#something was wrong enough to knock off a star and lower the average rating but not wrong enough to message me or put text in the review!!

[sergle]

oooooOOH you lil binch...

[gaystardust]

Twelve Weak Lies 1/? [Kanera Week Day 2]

Synopsis: An injury forces Hera and Kanan to land on Eso, a planet neither of them have heard of. Neither of them expect to fall undercover as a young couple expecting the first child, just because the people of the village are so convinced that’s who they are. Rating: Teen and Up Warnings: Discussion of pregnancy and pregnancy loss, although neither of those actually happen. Some discussion of poverty and existence. AO3 Link: [link] A/N: There is a host of made up fruit/vegetables (or our-world food given a slightly warped version of its name), some made of Twi’leki culture. This is Chapter 1, and the rest of the chapters will go on AO3 at some point after Kanera Week because I am waaayyy behind.

 ----------------

 “What about that one?” Kanan asked, making a stab at something on the star map Hera couldn’t even see.

She leant forward, squinting at the… planet? Moon? Speck of dust caught in the projector? “I’m not sure I even know where that is.”

He shrugged. “Doesn’t matter where it is. I’ve got a feeling.”

A feeling. It was always ‘a feeling’, a phrase Hera couldn’t parse well enough to know when it was just a hunch, or something a little more concrete.

Of course, concrete generally meant something mysterious and borderline magic that she would never be able to understand and Kanan would never explain.

Hera sighed, turning back to the ground slowly rising towards them. It was a powdery brown colour, muted across the whole of the planet bar thick splotches of green and blue in a band around the equator. A quick scan showed few life forms, unsurprising based on the size of the planet, centred around several obvious sentiments.

She’d spent a good few hours in hyperspace trying to work out what exactly this planet was and if there was any infrastructure they should be aware of. But it was still just a blank pinprick in the middle of nothingness, with absolutely no information past a name and an export listed anywhere on the holonet.

Eso. Main export, something helpfully named the Eesu fruit, and wood from something called the Uko tree.

So basically there was nothing. Absolutely nothing. And yet, Kanan wanted them to go there, so they were going.

Or maybe Hera was just tired of arguing. They’d had nothing but fights the last few days, the stress of their repeated failed missions rubbing them both the wrong way over and over.

The wound on her side still stung, and her leg wouldn’t hold her full weight unless she was leaning on something.

It had been an eventful tenday, to say the least.

The atmosphere seemed pretty good, rocking the ship a small amount as they entered. The gravity felt… fairly average, which made sense for the size of the planet.

Hera tapped the intercom button on the control panel, leaning forward. “Almost ready to land, Kanan. If you could come up, that would be great.”

It would take a little while for them to reach the ground, but having them both up front would help. There was so little they could do without the pretence of a fully functioning crew - or even a family unit, in some cases. It stopped people questioning how two people so young had ended up with a ship of their own, travelling the galaxy instead of enlisting or settling down to start a family.

There were no prizes for guessing which comment was directed at who.

By the time the landing legs of the Ghost had fully extended, Kanan was finally in the cockpit. Whatever he’d been doing in his quarters had apparently held him up, but nothing past the “sorry, I was busy” indicated what exactly that was.

A dark-skinned Kiffar waved them down, her dark hair tied up and fluttering behind her back. Hera could already see the pouch on her belt, likely heavy with credits and whatever else people were paying in.

Kanan sighed, standing without prompting. Sometimes, his Force sensitivity came in handy. “I’ll go get it.”

The minute they were securely landed and shut down, the Kiffar was stepping up to meet them. She was tall, as tall as Kanan if not more so. She looked somewhat strict, but nothing they couldn’t handle.

“Y’new here?” she asked, voice rough under her Outer Rim accent. Kanan nodded, immediately stepping up to his usual role. They’d practised this too many times to slip up. “Yes, Ma’am. Looking for somewhere safe to dock our ship, likely long term.”

“You planning to stick around?” “We hope so,” Her added, moving to stand slightly behind Kanan’s shoulder. “We could do with a fresh start.”

For a second, the Kiffar considered them. “Work?”

Kanan nodded to himself. “For me, not for her,” he shrugged towards Hera. The Kiffar gave her an odd look, analysing something between them that was a little uncomfortable. “She’s not well at the minute.”

It wasn’t a lie, and it wasn’t hard for her to see. Hera knew she was washed out, skin grey-ish as she recovered from the obnoxious injury on her side. Even when she tried to stand straight, she was hunched to one side.

Whatever the Kiffar was looking for, she clearly found. “Well, if you’re sticking around, call me Mihra. Now…” She glanced to the Ghost, the cogs ticking behind her eyes. “Y’planning to stay on the ship, or are ya looking for a house?”

They looked between each other, considering for half a second. “Yeah,” Kanan spoke up, turning back to Mihra. “Yeah, somewhere to live would be great.”

She nodded, turning to call something over her shoulder. It sounded like Huttese, but it might not be at all - definitely derivative though. One of the attendants rushed off somewhere.

“Tiss will see what she can find. Let’s get your ship settled, and then we’ll get you somewhere to stay.” She must have noticed the confusion in Hera’s face, unsure why they were willing to help. “Relax. You aren’t the first people to turn up like this, and y’won’t be the last. We’re a community of people on the run from something or other. If you’re willing to work, we’re willing to help.”

She said it with finality, as if she expected neither of them to ask any more questions.

And so they didn’t.

—

They were barely settled an hour when someone knocked on the door. The wood rattled its metal fixtures, a noise neither of them were particularly used to, before opening easily.

Hera reached for her blaster automatically, Kanan doing the same. She already had it trained on the doorway when a tall, Rodian woman stepped forward. Her eyes trained on the blasters for a moment, but she didn’t react.

Her bright, star-field eyes watched the two of them before she half turned towards the doorway. “Maar? I would stay outside a little longer, if I were you.”

Hera half-lowered the blaster, but not completely.

When the Rodian turned back, she smiled. “Apologies, I clearly should have waited. Mahra told me you were looking for work?”

Kanan stepped forward, nodding. “I am.”

She nodded. “The name’s Tsiin, I work in one of the forests just out of town - fruit picking. Not necessarily difficult, but we mainly pick for ourselves so it’s fairly rewarding.”

There was a moment of quiet while Kanan considered it. “And the pay?”

“I should have guessed,” Tsiin laughed, shaking her head. “It’s fair. Some of the payment is in food, we pick a variety so it doesn’t get too bad. Otherwise, it’s pay based on quantity. 30 credits per bag, we normally get a handful done between us a day.”

Kanan clicked his ton. “So, why do I pick that instead of the other options?”

“Three things,” she held her hand up, four fingers curled up into a fist. “Safety. Shorter hours. Less Imperial pressure.” Something about that made Tsiin look directly at Hera. “More time at home, supporting your partner here.”

“That’s four things,” Hera pointed out sharply, but Kanan half spoke over her.

“Fine. When do I start?”

“Day after tomorrow. Get yourselves settled tomorrow. I’ll come and collect you an hour after dawn, and you’ll be back before sundown.”

To Hera, they sounded long hours of physical labour, but Kanan seemed to think it was fine. “Okay. Deal. I can’t promise how long we’ll hang around, though.”

“Oh, we’re used to that.”

The new voice was deeper, raspier, strangely melodic for the near-human body it came from. Their hair was so dark, it stuck out against the almost white colour of his skin and their clouded eyes. In one hand they held a bag of interlocking ropes, metal containers swinging low.

The cane in their other hand tapped on the floor just in front of him.

They smiled vaguely into the room, mostly looking towards them but not perfectly. “Apologies for interrupting, but we are more than used to people coming and going in our community. Fast friends are common here.”

Tsiin sighed from where she should. “This is Maar. They run one of the market stalls in town.”

Kanan stayed quiet, but Hera forced herself to smile, hoping he could hear it in how she spoke. “Nice to meet you, Maar.”

“Likewise,” they replied, before holding out the rope bag towards her. It was more direct than previously, her voice helping them pinpoint a little more accurately. “I brought you some necessities to last you until at least tomorrow. Hopefully, you will find them helpful. There is not much, but I checked with some locals for what you would need to eat, Miss…”

“Hera,” she supplied quickly, hoping against all odds that this wasn’t a bad idea.

“Miss Hera. I asked what you could eat, while Kanan, I can guess myself,” they smile was a little too wide, but not threatening in its strangeness. “Hopefully you will find something to your liking.”

“There’s bedding in here as well,” Tsiin said carefully. “And spare clothes. Like I’m sure Mihra said, we are more than used to strangers arriving on our doorstep.”

Hera stepped forward again, letting Kanan take his time. Whatever he was reading into the two, it was taking all of his focus. “Thank you, honestly. It’s incredibly generous of you.” She stepped forward to take the bag, surprised by how heavy it was, and how little effort Maar had been exerting.

Tsiin looked between both of them, before nodding .”Alright, well. We’ll let you get settled. Come on, old man, I’ll walk you home.”

The near-human turned sharply, putting their arm out to take Tsiin’s. “You two had best come and visit me soon.”

Now, Kanan replied. “Of course, Sir. As soon as we can.”

“And I shall hold you to that!” Something in their tone was completely serious.

Just as they crossed the threshold, Tsiin twisted back. “Day after tomorrow, kid. Me and the crew will come and get you.”

Kanan nodded, giving her his best grin. “I’m looking forward to it.”

—

The house was small and dark, thankfully cool despite the high humidity outside. It almost reminded Hera of the buried houses on Ryloth, chasing away the burning sun and the impending dessert by blocking out the sunlight that most humanoids were desperate for.

Kanan, she knew, hated it. He’d told her often enough in the week they’d been based on Eso. Something about the lack of natural light, and the strange feeling of being half-buried in clay and hay walls.

Still, Hera had forced him to stick with it, pushing through the wobbliness in her right thigh as she ran more whitewash across the peeling wall. One of the neighbours had given it to them, with instructions to paint their new home before the peeling paint cracked through to the wall and the smell of dung crept from its prison.

She hated painting, had since she was a child, but even Hera had to admit there was something nice about painting walls. There was no precision to it, covering such a large space in a single colour, but she could still see where she’d succeeded to cover it.

It was more than a little satisfying.

The twinge in her torn rib muscle reminded her not to lift her arms too high, but there was no way she could balance on one of the stools they’d found. The wound in her leg was healing quickly, but it had been a nasty shot, with metal hooks digging into her leg before she’d had a chance to think. Even now, weeks later, it twitched and ached whenever she put weight through it.

Taking a deep breath, she hobbled over to the mats they’d been using as a bed (two of them, layered over each other for some comfort, even if it meant sleeping next to each other). The drop to the ground was further than she would have liked, her leg giving out halfway as she hit the mat with a thump.

At least, she mostly made it onto the mat - before decided that was far enough. The mats themselves weren’t thick enough to hold her at an uncomfortable angle, even half hanging off them, and moving much further would take more energy than she had. Pausing there would work which better

Hera reached for the comm tucked into the waistband of the shorts she’d claimed from Kanan (she tried not to think of them as underwear, because they weren’t - he just slept in them). They were easier to move in while she renovated the space they would be living in for the next few weeks at least.

“Kanan?” she asked carefully, listening for the telltale bzzzzz-click to say she’d connected. “Make sure to get eggs for tonight as well.”

A laugh came from the other end, covered in static but completely Kanan. “I know, Hera, I’ve already got them.”

“And the vegetables I asked you to get?”

—

Kanan stared down at the pile he was carrying. “Okuru, gulalung, solum and greens.”

“And the annuum?” Hera added, the lecture obvious in her tone.

“Of course,” he lied through his teeth, doing his best to sound exasperated. “How could I forget?”

The sigh on the other end of the line made the comm crackle unpleasantly. “Just remember to pick them up before you come home. And the persipan. Can’t make sweet curry without them.”

“I know, I know, you tell me often enough.” He absolutely did not know, they had never discussed this, but there was something about admitting that that felt like it would blow their cover. After all, the people of this community had decided they were an established couple, and he wasn’t about to make them question that.

He could hear Hera moving around on the pallet they’d been sleeping. It creaked if you moved to hard. “Can you get some alata as well? I fancy some. We can cook them with porridge in the morning.”

It had been way too long since they’d eaten fresh fruit and vegetables instead of the rations they mainly ate while travelling, and the first time they’d had a steady income in even longer. He was already heading back to the market anyway, so he might as well.

That didn’t stop him filling his voice with exasperation, the fake tone he used for chores he would do without her even asking. “Of course, your highness, I’ll get you what you want.”

A hand reached out, catching him around the back of his head. “Wha- hey!” He spun around, face to face with a fairly old Nagai, who had already caught him at their market stall that morning. “Maar?”

The comm in his hand crackled. “Kanan?” Hera’s voice was filled with concern.

Maar’s eyes were greyed over with cataracts, but they still landed on the comm. “Apologies, I have interrupted you. Continue.”

Kanan watched them carefully, not sure how to take this interruption. Still, he returned the com to in front of his mouth. “Don’t worry, Hera. It’s just a friend being a pain-” Beside him, Maar laughed as if that was the best joke they’d ever heard. “I’ll be back soon. I’ll speak to you later.”

“You’d better, Jarrus, or you’ll regret it.” The comm pinged once more as the connection was severed. Immediately, he spun to the Nagai.

“Really?”

“You shouldn’t complain about your partner, Kanan Jarrus. She is trying her hardest to keep her spirits up while shut inside.”

Of course, Maar knew nothing about why Hera was shut inside, past that she was unwell. That was a lie they kept spreading - not that it was completely a lie, just an oversimplification.

“I know, Maar,” Kanan said with a shake of his head. He knew she was struggling, but what else could they do. She could barely walk, never mind anything else. “She’s trying to keep herself busy, painting the house while I’m at work, but- OW!”

This tap on his shoulders was barely a tap. “Kanan Jarrus! You should be more careful. Your wife-”

“Partner,” he shot in quickly, trying to stop that instantly.

Maar nodded almost immediately. “Your partner is in a delicate position.”

Something clicked in Kanan’s mind, that perhaps telling everyone Hera was unwell would end badly for them both, long term. “No, no, she’s not that kind of sick. She’s just making sure to give herself plenty of time to rest.” Then he laughed, brushing his hair back out of his eyes. “Besides, I’m not sure I could get her to stop if I tried.”

The Nagai seemed to consider this, before nodding again. “Still. She should not exert herself, no matter how tempting.”

“Try telling that to Hera,” Kanan continued to laugh.

They arrived back at Maar’s stall, which they had left completely unguarded while they wandered off to… hopefully do something other than following Kanan, but he honestly couldn’t be so sure.

Each of the shelves and crates was practically overgrowing with local fruit and foraged roots, along with cheaply imported items. The whole place smelled like overheated sweetness, with a side of acidity.

Maar didn’t say anything as they placed food items into Kanan’s arms, and the robe bag they had given them on the first day that had arrived there.

“No, Maar, we don’t need any meiloorun you’re fine, or any eesu, I’ll be getting some from work later this week, I don’t have the money to-”

Maar shook their head. “Take them, from me to you. I have seen many like your partner here, and fresh food is always good. After all, she will need her strength, and you will need to be prepared. The next generation are always particular in their wants.”

Kanan blinked. “I’m sorry, what?”

Maar watched him carefully. A few skinny black braids falling in front of their eyes before they spoke again. “Apologies. I assumed you already knew - it has been the talk of the town for the last few days.”

Thoughts swirled in the back of Kanan’s head. Yeah, okay, the town wasn’t that big - maybe a few hundred people maximum, and most of them lived identical lives to all of the other’s around them, so gossip was a bit of a thing.

They were meant to be laying low.

“That… Hera is pregnant?”

Maar nodded as if that was obvious. “Of course. That is why she is in seclusion, yes? Not a practice I would use myself, but I know many species - including Twi’leks, she is a Twi’lek, yes? - use them as standard practice.”

The townspeople thought Hera was pregnant. They had taken the fake relationship between the two alongside Hera’s ‘illness’, and decided that meant they were going to be parents.

It took a few seconds, and a few deep breaths, for Kanan to pull his thoughts together. “No, no, she’s… she’s not in seclusion, Maar, she’s just more comfortable at home.” Maar gave him a look of complete disbelief, and Kanan made himself press on. “She has an injury to one of her legs that’s playing up.”

They nodded as if a grave secret had finally been explained. “Well, I’m sure she’ll be up and walking in no time. Just make sure you get her the food she has requested - the body knows what it needs better than we could ever understand.”

All Kanan could do was nod. If Maar wasn’t going to understand that Hera wasn’t pregnant, he wasn’t going to push it. Stars, he couldn’t even make himself think about it fully.

He handed over the credits to pay, Maar handing him back the chunk that would have covered the extra fruit. Kanan didn’t bother arguing, quickly taking his leave and ending their conversation abruptly. The Nagai wasn’t at all putout.

It was only when he was sure they were out of earshot that Kanan felt safe to react. “Shit.” At least Maar had covered Hera’s requests - he wouldn’t have to face anyone else that day. “Shit.”

—

“You didn’t tell him I wasn’t?”

Hera stood with her hands on her hips, poised like she was ready to fight. She had him quite literally cornered, standing in the centre of the room while he was sat on the bed.

“I told him you weren’t secluded, I just didn’t specifically say you weren’t pregnant.”

It had seemed logical at the time to let the cover the town had invented for them fly, but Hera was taking this much worse than Kanan had thought she would. He’d assumed that he would come home, explain what had been said, and they would laugh about it - but, no, Hera was taking personal offence to it.

She threw her hands in the air, lekku barely bobbing behind her. “That’s the problem! You should have just said I wasn’t, corrected him before it went any further.”

Kanan shrugged. He wanted nothing more than to pull his knees up to his chest, but he’d been trained better than that. “Does it really matter? They’ll work it out soon enough, once you’re well enough to wander around and they realise you clearly aren’t pregnant.”

“They’re just going to assume I’m not showing yet,” Hera added almost too quickly. “Or worse.” Her voice cracked as she said that. Then she shifted, dropping onto the mat beside him. Her head fell into her hands. The defeat in her voice was obvious “I don’t want to be involved with this, Kanan.”

Kanan shifted himself to put his hand on her shoulder. “I’m sorry, Hera. I didn’t think about the impact this would have - to be honest, I’m not sure I even thought. I was so caught off guard, I’m not sure I was planning anything.”

Hera made herself breath, lekku still unnaturally calm. “I know.” She sighed, pushing herself further forward. “I know you didn’t mean it, I just… I don’t know how to deal with that.” There was another pause before she let out a frustrated, grumbling sound. “But I don’t know how we get out of it without sounding awful, especially with people giving us free things because they think I’m pregnant!”

He nodded, looking towards her carefully. “We could always let them have their rumour. Leave before they realise you’re not showing because you’re not actually pregnant.”

“That’s a terrible idea,” Hera said quickly. “We’d be breaking their trust, making them think something about us that we’re not. It’s one thing to keep saying ‘partners’, it’s another to actually commit to that.”

“But you’re considering it.”

“Yes. Yes, I am.”

Everything dropped away for a moment, except the bubbling of the curry over the fire. It smelt deliciously spicy and sweet, filling the room around them.

For the first time in a long time, Kanan wondered if he should meditate.

He immediately pushed that out of his brain.

Hera sat up a little straighter. “ Can humans and twi’leks even have children together?”

“I mean, yeah, of course they can?” Kanan couldn’t help the question in his voice, wanting to know how he knew that when she didn’t. “I’ve never met any properly, but I saw plenty of blended families when I was growing up.”

Her body stopped moving, even though it barely was in the first place. For a single breath, she was just looking at him, and he was looking at her, and something around them shifted.

“I’m never letting you near me again,” she said finally.

“What?” Kanan huffed, gesturing towards her where she stood in front of him. “I’ve never even been near you! At all! What- I- You-” He took a deep breath, staring towards the shuttered windows. Hopefully, no one could hear them. “Look. If it bothers you that much, I’ll start correcting people.”

Hera sighed, flopping back on the mat as if she’d given up. She tried to hold back the wince, but Kanan still noticed. He didn’t comment.

“I can’t believe I’m saying this, but you shouldn’t. Start correcting people, I mean.” She didn’t look completely convinced, but something must have done it. “It might be easier if they think I’m staying at home because of morning sickness. We wouldn’t have to explain why it’s taking so long to recover from a minor injury.”

“Do you think we can pull it off, though? No offence, but we’ve known each other for - what, a year? Do we know each other well enough to pass for a couple who would be having a kid together?”

Hera shrugged where she lay. “I don’t think it matters, Kay. Not every couple is physically affectionate in public - some aren’t affectionate at all. Hopefully no one will notice.” Then she laughed, bright and filling the room. “Besides, we wouldn’t be fake dating, we’re just… not correcting their assumptions. It doesn’t mean we have to actually pretend we’re together.”

Kanan hummed to himself, trying to find the line in his head. It would be incredibly difficult to find the line where people would just accept their relationship, and not ask any questions.

“So we have… what? Two, two and a half months here then?”

Hera nodded. “That would be the plan. We can probably go for more if we need to, but let’s aim for that.”

Two and a half months. Just two and a half months.

He could probably manage that.

[xroamywoamyx]

Sleep My Sweet Prince (Spoilers)

Fandom: Sander Sides

Rating: K+

Genre: Hurt/Comfort and Fluff

Word Count:1785

Pairing: Creativisleep (Roman/Remy)

Roman Sat On The Floor Of His Bedroom Knees To His Chest Face Hidden As He Sobbed Quietly. He'd been there for hours. He knew that at this point he was just being dramatic, but dammit. It still hurt. If Jay had said literally anything else he would have been able to take it. Even if he had said Roman was foolish or unnecessary it would have been fine. He already knew these things, Logan made sure he knew it after all. Though with Logan it wasn't genuine and he knew that... and even if it was he couldn't say that he was wrong. He was stupid, he typically prided himself on it actually, most Prince's weren't known for their high intellect. Heroes use to be brave, heroic and charming without being overly bright. If they needed something done that required more then an average IQ then the lovable nerdy sidekick would do it. It wasn't until recently that his brand of heroics became out dated and... And Toxic... He'd only needed to be good looking and strong before, he stuck by a strong moral code...

A Moral Code He Doesn't Understand Anymore...

If Patton...

No.

If Thomas.... No longer Needed Him Or His Brand Of Heroics Anymore...

What Was The Point.

Thomas did have Remus after all and if Janus fit into Thomas' new found sense of morality.\

Who's to say his Brother wouldn't also...

After all Jay had said he couldn't tell them apart....well...those weren't his exact words but that's what he said.

If He and Remus were truly so similar then surely Remus could handle things on his own. He didn't really need to hang around, he contributed the least out of everyone else and he had a ready to go replacement. What was the point of him staying around?

He clearly wasn't wanted...

He continued to sob letting his thoughts run wild each one doing more damage to his fragile self worth. He continued to sob quietly for several more minutes feeling more and more alone as each minute passed.

After awhile there was a soft knock on his door "Go away'' Roman called out ''you're not wanted'' he said voice sounding muffled

The person behind the door scoffed in fake offense ''Well babe I know that can't be true because I'm always wanted'' The door creaked open slowly and as the light streamed in to reveal the hyper insomniac Remy Sanders. Roman glared at the caffeine fiend "I Am Not A Liar Remington!" he spat angrily still fuming in no mood for jokes ''Well someone's in a mood'' Remy said in a slightly softer tone taking a sip of his drink.

'' Rough day?'' Remy asked plopping down next Roman ''buzz off sleep demon'' Roman insulted weakly Remy lowered his sunglasses and quirked his eyebrow at Roman "oh really, you wanna do nicknames right now'' Roman hugged his knees a little closer ''sorry..''. Roman felt something heavy get placed on his shoulders ''Nah Princy you're fine'' Remy yawned wrapping his jacket around Roman before kicking back against Roman's bed '' just don't call me Remington again'' he picked up his drink and offered it to Roman ''want some''. Roma ignored him ''You know I'm not a coffee person Rem'' Remy cracks a smile "who said it was coffee" Roman looked at Remy with genuine surprise and curiosity. Remy laughed to him self smirking and taking another sip "Your loss, ma petite frère".

Roman loosened his grip on his knees continuing to sulk "What are you even doing here..." Remy signed " well it's not like I want to be here or anything" he twirls his cup sarcastically "and besides there's this prince who's keeping me up" he nudged Roman gently."I'm sorry..." Roman said quietly "don't" Remy looks at Roman '' don't do that Princy'' Roman laughs and lets his head fall back and rest against the bed ''I'm not much of a prince anymore" he smiled as silent tears fell down his face these not from anger or frustration at the days prior events but do to real pain and hurt. "Maybe..." Remy sighed ''or maybe, just maybe you're just tired'' Roman laughed ''you can't take credit for everything Rem'' Remy scoffed ''or maybe, I can'' he gently wraps his arm around Roman making him rest his head on his shoulder Roman yawns ''don't Remy...''.

He Took slight offense to that scoffing as he shoved Roman back off of him ''I wouldn't dare do such a thing  Princy, not even in your dreams'' Roman readjust himself removing Remy's jacket from his shoulders. ''I'm sorry'' he says trying to give it back to Remy ''Uh-uh'' Remy holds his hands up setting his drink down properly. ''Remy..'' Roman whined ''no!'' Remy fussed ''Remy I'm burning up'' he looked at him with a pouty face. Remy cupped Roman's face and placed a hand on his forehead ''Yeah but you're cooling down fast and you'll start to shiver, so put on the damn jacket'' Roman wiped his face and crossed his arms shaking Remy off before shaking away "Roman..'' Remy softened his voice. ''It's okay, you're okay Roman'' Remy grips Roman's shoulder making the distraught prince look at him. ''Listen to me Princy'' he places his hand on his chest applying the slightest amount of pressure to calm him down '' you have one of the kindest and bravest hearts of any person I know, please for the love all the shirtless hot male strippers out there, let me passive aggressively take care of you". A chill ran down Roman's back, Remy was right, his body temperature was already beginning to drop and he was getting cold. He tried to stop himself from reacting to the chill and not shiver but unfortunately failed...

Remy smacked his shoulder "I told you bitch, now put on the fucking jacket and let me run my hands through your beautiful hair while you do that feelings thing and tell me your problems" Roman laughed giving in and putting on Remy's jacket. It was actually really comfortable and calming then he had thought it would be. "Feelings things?" he quirked an eyebrow at Remy "that was such a Logan thing to say" he mentions as he carefully slumps himself sideways and lays down in Remy's lap. Remy takes off his sunglasses and glares at Roman playfully '' How very rude of you to imply I am anything like that nerd'' Roman yawned ''I dunno you guys are kinda similar'' Remy tugs his hair a little harshly in response. ''What are you doing here Remy'' Roman asked sounding pitiful, Remy returned to soothingly stroking Roman's hair gently '' I came to check on you'' ''I came to check on you...'' he sighed ''I was worried'' . ''You shouldn't of been'' Roman continued to sulk, Remy rolled his eyes ''oh get over yourself Roman'' Remy chose his words poorly, Roman turned away from him and onto his side in Remy's lap ''sorry...''. Remy sighed in slight frustration at his Royal fuck up ''No Roman that's not what I meant, I mean'' he pauses for a moment thinking hard about his words. ''Don't think you're the only one who, don't think...Dammit'' he ran hand through his hair '' let people care about you Princy you're not Logan and he shouldn't stop people either'' he finally pushes out. ''And I, I care a lot, so I'm going to worry weather you want me to or not, I'm a stubborn sleep deprived coffee gay, you will not be able to out argue me on the ways you're amazing and worthy'' he let out a long breathe after spitting out his mismesh of words that he really wasn't proud of. Roman continued to sulk refusing to rollover and look at him '' Roman...'' he nudged him gently ''talk to me...please'' no response. Remy's heart sunk and he went to remove his hand from Roman's hair disappointingly feeling like he'd failed. ''Don't stop...'' Came a mumbled whisper ''what!?'' Remy asked surprised ''you can mess with my hair...I like it...'' Remy laughed at Roman's resistant response ''Okay'' he smiled returning his hand to Roman's hair. They sat like that for several minutes in silence Roman staying closed off and Remy just patiently waiting for if and when he'd be okay.

After awhile the quiet broke ''You think I'm amazing'' Roman sniffled ''hell yeah I do'' Remy smiled ''I think you're wonderful Princy'' Roman readjusted slightly still keeping his back to Remy. ''Why'' he asked needing validation, Remy was happy to oblige ''Well'' he began ''you're charming and kind, I really did mean what I said about you having a good heart. You're just filled with so much love and hope, It's really awe-inspiring and you come up with the most beautiful dreams for my nights with Thomas'' his voice was low and soft. ''Oh..'' Roman doesn't know how to respond "but honestly that's not enough, you try so hard to make everyone happy, even more then  Patton does, a lot more actually. You care so much about other people and what they think, I've seen you literally hang the stars for people'' Remy went on ''Logan wanted them..'' Roman mumbled again slowly loosening up. '' And you spent many dreamless nights collecting them and then setting them up for him...'' he trailed off. Roman finally rolled over and looked up at Remy ''How do you know that?'' Remy's cheeks tinted pink ''well-I...You weren't there to help me with dreams...and Remus..did it...instead'' the coffee fanatic was having a hard time getting his words out, something that was Very unusual.

''Anyways..are you feeling better'' he tries to hides blush summoning his sleep mask and lazily flopping it on his face ''I'm tired and out of coffee'' . '' Hey Remy'' Roman readjusted so his weight was entirely on Remy's legs. ''Hmm?'' He responded taking off the sleep mask ''thank you'' he yawned snuggling up to Remy still wearing his jacket. Remy was silent for a moment heat rising in his face ''Yeah- anytime Roman..'' he stays rigid at attention coming from Roman not really sure how to process it.

''Rem'' Roman Whispers again into Remy's neck, ''Yeah Ro'' he responds. Roman lifts his head for a minute and kisses Remy's cheek before laying his head back down on again ''Can you stay and help me sleep tonight please''.

Like he'd even have to ask..

Remy smiled to quietly resting his head on Roman's head ''Of Course Princy, You Can Sleep Peacefully Tonight, I Got You'' Remy curled his fingers around Roman's hand and brings it up to his lips and kisses it peacefully putting the prince to sleep.

''Goodnight''

[junker-town]

Tulsa football, 2017 AAC champs? If this offense is truly plug-and-play, maybe so

If the Golden Hurricane have a QB, look out.

“College football is so better when [Historically Great Team] is great.” We hear statements like that quite a bit. We all have our own definition of what makes this silly sport so enjoyable, but it frequently has to do with guys in certain helmets playing good ball.

Typically, that stems from who was good during the formative stages of our fandom. When a team is dominant as your impression of a sport is taking shape, it’s just going to feel natural when that team is dominant again at some later date.

That goes for salty mid-majors, too, at least in my book.

I grew up in Oklahoma, and while my formative years skewed more toward the mid- to late-1980s, when OU and Miami were running college football, my umbrella was only beginning to expand. Catching a mid-major — or even a lower-tier power conference team — on television was a rarity. But when I did catch one, I was fascinated.

I remember being fascinated by a school called Tulane when the Green Wave (coached by a young up-and-comer named Mack Brown) took on Washington in the 1987 Independence Bowl. I remember them taking the lead in the second quarter before succumbing.

I remember Maine playing on TV and loving the black-and-sky-blue uni combination.

I remember Tulsa falling in a tight one to Oregon in the 1989 Independence Bowl. And I remember Tulsa wrecking shop on most of its opponents two years later.

Dave Rader’s 1991 Golden Hurricane beat Oklahoma State, then knocked off No. 15 Texas A&M two weeks later. They lost only at a decent Kansas and to eventual national champion Miami at home. (It was scoreless after the first quarter before turnovers helped Miami ease ahead.)

They wrapped the season up by taking down San Diego State and running back Marshall Faulk, 28-17, in the Freedom Bowl in Anaheim. Faulk rushed for 153 yards, but Tulsa’s Ron Jackson rushed for 211.

Tulsa didn’t do anything special; the Golden Hurricane were just good. And it seemed natural for them to be good. Though they would never again reach similar heights under Rader or successor Keith Burns, my impression was that it was Tulsa’s place in the world to be a salty mid-major capable of taking on anyone.

The program has lived up to that reputation more in the last 14 years than ever before. Steve Kragthorpe took the Golden Hurricane to three bowls in four years, then left for Louisville. Todd Graham engineered three 10-win seasons in four years, then left for Pitt. Bill Blankenship kept the ship sailing for two years before falling off, but Philip Montgomery needed almost no time at all to get the program back on course. From 2-10 in 2014, Tulsa has risen to 6-7 in 2015 and 10-3 in 2016.

Last fall saw the best Tulsa defense in three years and the best Tulsa offense in five. Most of the key defensive pieces are back, and on offense, the run game should be excellent again. The remodeled passing game will determine whether the Hurricane fall back toward minor bowl territory or threaten for the AAC crown.

Montgomery’s rebuild has been impressive, and it has begun to look comprehensive. Montgomery was Art Briles’ quarterbacks coach at Stephenville (Tex.) High School in the late-1990s and took on the same role at Houston in 2003. He followed Briles to Waco and served as offensive coordinator until he moved to Tulsa in 2015. Granted, being a Briles mentee has taken on different meaning over the last year or so, and the fact that Montgomery spent seven years with Briles in Waco leaves a “what did he know, and when?” impression that’s hard to shake, fair or unfair. But from a football perspective, what Baylor did on the field is an effective example to follow.

Montgomery’s version of the offense has just about reached plug-and-play automation (something that will be tested this year with the rebuilding of the passing game), and the defense fits the same aggressive mold that Baylor pulled off in Briles’ peak. The Hurricane get division rivals Navy, Houston, and Memphis at home — Temple, too, for that matter — and are basically a quarterback away from being a potential AAC favorite.

2016 in review

2016 Tulsa statistical profile.

One positive effect of teams that combine offensive efficiency with defensive aggression: it’s pretty easy to tell where they stand. If they have the athletes to make disruptive plays and force turnovers and three-and-outs on defense, then they do so. If they don’t have an athletic advantage, they probably don’t.

This is a pretty good recipe for manhandling inferior opposition but getting pushed around by better teams.

Tulsa vs. S&P+ top 60 (1-3): Avg. percentile performance: 47% (~top 70) | Avg. yards per play: Opp 6.2, TU 5.9 | Avg. score: Opp 40, TU 33 | Avg. plays per game: Opp 78, TU 77

Tulsa vs. No. 61-plus (9-0): Avg. percentile performance: 63% (~top 50) | Avg. yards per play: TU 6.2, Opp 5.1 | Avg. score: TU 47, Opp 29 | Avg. plays per game: TU 90, Opp 78

Against lesser teams, Tulsa controlled the ball — both through offensive efficiency and the ability to make aggressive defensive stops — and wore opponents down. Against better opponents, their defense got burned more, and opponents were able to play keep-away enough to derive an advantage.

Granted, this effect was magnified by the fact that all four of Tulsa’s games against top-60 teams came on the road, but it’s pretty easy to see where the line was for the Hurricane. And it’s easy to see how important ball control was. That won’t change in 2017, but the onus might shift more to the offense.

Offense

Full advanced stats glossary.

Maybe my favorite Ian Boyd piece for SB Nation is one from 2013, in which he lays out all the minor details of Briles’ offense, a.k.a. “college football’s most unstoppable system.”

First is Baylor's employment of the spread offense. Baylor's spread is more intense than most, with even the inside receivers lining up outside of the hash marks. Most every team in college football utilizes some aspect of spread tactics, but everything Baylor does is built around spacing out defenses so that individual matchups can be hammered.

On the outside, speed is king. Baylor sends every receiver vertical early and often in every game. In particular, they love that most defensive schemes match safeties or linebackers in coverage against their slot receivers, so they make a habit of using play action or vertical routes. That makes safeties have to turn and run with 4.4 sprinters like Reese. [...]

The Bear attack to the middle of the field is all about power. ... Baylor's run game is primarily based in inside zone and power-O blocking. Meaning, defensive linemen are constantly getting blocked at an angle or by double teams coming straight at them.

Baylor then pairs these running concepts with quarterback reads. Bryce Petty can either throw a perimeter screen or quick pass or keep the ball himself, based on his read of "overhang" defenders. These are the players who are being stressed to choose whether they'll align outside to run down a screen pass or inside to fill an interior running play. Read-option concepts guarantee those defenders are always wrong.

Of course, Baylor also has some of the best play-action as well. Old school, new school, it's all there in Waco.

Tulsa’s 2016 offense featured most of the necessary pieces for this dominant attack. The Golden Hurricane’s top three receivers combined to average 14 yards per catch, and their top two rushers averaged 5.9 yards per carry with above-average explosiveness. Quarterback Dane Evans didn’t quite have the mobility component necessary for full Baylorization, but this got pretty close. Tulsa ranked in the top 40 in both Rushing S&P+ and Passing S&P+ and combined third-down conversions (20th in FBS) with big plays (244 gains of 10-plus yards, 71 of 20-plus) and a relentless tempo in a way that made the attack unstoppable against most teams.

Brad Mills-USA TODAY Sports

Justin Hobbs

It’s easy to assume that an offense like this becomes plug-and-play after a while? You lost your QB? Well, the next guy will do as well. Two 1,000-yard receivers are gone? Two more will emerge.

Montgomery’s only entering his third season in Tulsa, though. We don’t know for sure that he has been able to put together the pieces he needs for seamless production.

We don’t know that former star recruit Chad President is ready to begin living up to hype. He worked with the first string quite a bit this spring and went 12-for-20 in the spring game. He has potentially high-end mobility, too. But can he hit the vertical passes? And if he can’t, are sophomore Will Hefley III or redshirt freshman Luke Skipper ready to take over?

We don’t know if D’Angelo Brewer has a battery mate this year. Brewer and James Flanders combined to rush for 3,000 yards, but Flanders had the edge in both efficiency and explosiveness. Can senior Rowdy Simon or a sophomore like Corey Taylor II or big Javon Thomas live up to that standard?

We don’t know that the next two in line will match the production of inside receiver Keevan Lucas and outside receiver Josh Atkinson. They averaged 14.1 yards per catch with a 53 percent success rate; granted, junior Justin Hobbs averaged 13.7 per catch at 52 percent, but who steps up at inside receiver? Sophomore Keenen Johnson (10.2, 60 percent)? Senior Bishop Louie (7.0, 17 percent)? A three-star redshirt freshman (Josh Stewart, Jordan Brown) or true freshman (Sam Crawford, Keylon Stokes)?

We do know that Tulsa will have one of the best lines in the AAC; four of last year’s starters are back, including three all-conference guys: center Chandler Miller, guard Tyler Bowling, and tackle Evan Plagg. But we’ll pretty quickly find out if Tulsa is at plug-and-play status everywhere else.

Rob Ferguson-USA TODAY Sports

Chad President

Defense

The philosophy of the post-Baylor defense is simple: you’ve got an explosive, relentless offense that is going to take a ton of snaps and score a ton of points. In theory, you just need to break serve a few times with your defense. You will allow points and yards, but if you can flip the field with a few three-and-outs and a couple of turnovers, it will be almost impossible for the opponent to keep up.

Tulsa lived that in 2016. The Golden Hurricane ranked eighth in FBS, allowing a 35.1 percent success rate; they also ranked 121st in IsoPPP, a measure of the magnitude of those successful plays. They forced three-and-outs on 30 percent of their possessions (ninth) and forced 21 turnovers (53rd) while giving up 33 gains of 30-plus yards (92nd).

Relatively speaking, the pass defense was further along than the run defense, though really, only three teams ran the ball well, and two (Ohio State and Navy, which combined to gain 658 yards at 5.9 per carry) ran well against most. That leaves only one abnormally awful performance: Tulane gained 355 yards at 7.2 per carry.

Tulsa returns six starters and most of its second stringers, but this could be a situation where strength gets stronger and weakness gets weaker. The run defense will certainly struggle to improve without its backbone — tackles Jerry Uwaezuoke and Hayden Carman, middle linebacker Trent Martin, and strong safety Jeremy Brady are all gone.

Granted, their departures could allow for a few veterans to thrive. Tackle Kolton Shindelar and linebacker Petera Wilson Jr., both seniors, combined for 12 tackles for loss last year in limited action. Of course, 9.5 were sacks. That doesn’t say much about run support.

If run defense does improve, it will probably be because of young heft. Sophomore tackle Shemarr Robinson (6’3, 307 pounds) is an exciting prospect, and three-star redshirt freshmen Johnnie Williams (6’3, 309) and Tyarise Stevenson (6’3, 340) packed on the pounds in their year off of the field.

Steve Mitchell-USA TODAY Sports

McKinley Whitfield & Jesse Brubaker

Either way, though, the pass defense should be stupendous. Losing Brady hurts, but corners Kerwin Thomas, Reggie Robinson II, and Keanu Hill (combined: 22 passes defensed) all return, as do safeties Jordan Mitchell and McKinley Whitfield (14 passes defensed, 3.5 tackles for loss). The defensive backs didn’t create as much havoc as you’d like to see in this type of defense, but they could with better experience.

Meanwhile, a pass rush that ranked a disappointing 90th in Adj. Sack Rate should improve. First, Shindelar and Wilson are both excellent pass rushers who will see the field more. Second, senior ends Jesse Brubaker and Jeremy Smith (combined: 21.5 TFLs, 9.5 sacks) return, as does linebacker Craig Suits (9 TFLs, 3.5 sacks).

Assuming Tulsa can actually leverage opponents into passing downs, they should be able to capitalize. But that’s assumption is far from certain.

Steve Mitchell-USA TODAY Sports

Craig Suits

Special Teams

Tulsa ranked 49th in Special Teams S&P+ in 2016 despite a couple of sketchy coverage units. Place-kicker Redford Jones is excellent in the field goals department (17-for-18 under 40 yards, 67-for-67 on PATs), but he rarely reached the end zone with his kickoffs. Meanwhile, punter Dalton Parks averaged a decent 41.8 yards per kick but also allowed 8.3 yards per return.

Parks is gone, which could be an issue if Tulsa has to punt a hair more. Still, this unit should be a net positive. Jones assures Tulsa of points even when scoring opportunities stall out, and both Bishop Louie (kick returns) and Keidrien Wadley (punt returns) are somewhere between solid and awesome.

2017 outlook

2017 Schedule & Projection Factors

Date Opponent Proj. S&P+ Rk Proj. Margin Win Probability 2-Sep at Oklahoma State 22 -17.8 15% 9-Sep UL-Lafayette 112 12.0 76% 16-Sep at Toledo 59 -8.3 31% 23-Sep New Mexico 110 11.8 75% 30-Sep Navy 71 1.1 52% 7-Oct at Tulane 94 3.1 57% 14-Oct Houston 49 -4.4 40% 21-Oct at Connecticut 125 11.5 75% 27-Oct at SMU 81 -0.1 50% 3-Nov Memphis 61 -3.0 43% 18-Nov at South Florida 56 -8.5 31% 25-Nov Temple 67 -1.8 46%

Projected S&P+ Rk 77 Proj. Off. / Def. Rk 78 / 68 Projected wins 5.9 Five-Year S&P+ Rk -3.8 (87) 2- and 5-Year Recruiting Rk 87 / 84 2016 TO Margin / Adj. TO Margin* 0 / 2.5 2016 TO Luck/Game -1.0 Returning Production (Off. / Def.) 52% (29%, 75%) 2016 Second-order wins (difference) 9.7 (0.3)

What I see in Tulsa: a team that is led by one of college football’s better offensive minds and features a defense with enough experience to improve on last year’s No. 77 Def. S&P+ ranking.

If we assume a high floor for the offense, and defensive improvement offsets minor offensive regression, then Tulsa is a potential top-50 team that could be favored in up to 10 games and will have a serious role in the AAC West race.

What S&P+ sees in Tulsa: a team that has to replace a disturbing amount of its passing attack with no proven replacements. The Hurricane return only 29 percent of last year’s offensive production, a level that almost guarantees regression, and they are projected to fall to 78th in Off. S&P+ because of it.

With a No. 77 overall projection, S&P+ sees Tulsa laboring to reach bowl eligibility, thanks to a schedule that features lots of tough home games and trips to Oklahoma State, Toledo, and USF.

Really, then, this season comes down to the plug-and-play status of the offense. If Montgomery’s system is to the point where it can function at a high level no matter who is throwing or catching passes, then Tulsa’s going to be an excellent team this year. But it’s hard to get a read on what this team has in the receiving corps, and it takes a lot of trust in Montgomery to assume the best.

Of course, Montgomery has earned some trust on offense, hasn’t he?

Team preview stats

All preview data to date.