#someone just euthanize him already

[57sfinest]

I know this must be a weird ask, you don't have to respond if you want but how would a poly relationship work with Jean and Harry? Like in general, not really specifics about who is with them or anything just like how a dynamic would work when they are still in the very codependent relationship but then they both fall for the same person. Am I the only one who sees the similarities to Rene and Gaston(?), Like that's how their relationship will end up.

NOT A WEIRD ASK I LOVE WHAT-IFS

since you're specifying the codependency i'm assuming we're talking a pre-martinaise j/h so that's how i'll be answering. i can definitely see where you're coming from about rene and gaston with the whole "constantly bickering rivals who both repressed the fact that they loved the other" thing but i feel like describing j/h as "in love" (the way rene & gaston were described) is a little too generous for a relationship that is based first and foremost off necessity and convenience. however the end of the rene & gaston situation definitely feels like how j/h could have ended if they both lived to that age without killing themselves or each other.

anyway like... i can't see them being able to rope a 3rd person into their bullshit. not without heavy coercion or substance abuse or some complicating 3rd factor because they genuinely are so toxic and fucked up that idk who could possibly want to be in the middle of that. BUT if it did happen, you have to keep in mind that harry is in control in the j/h dynamic. jean can bitch and moan all he wants but at the end of the day, what harry says goes-- he's got tangible authority at work + he's a decade older than jean + that's just the way their personalities collide. so it doesn't actually matter if jean likes this hypothetical 3rd person: if harry wants them involved he's gonna get them involved. and i can't see jean as wanting anyone else involved, so it would almost definitely be harry forcing it with someone he likes and jean doesn't care for.

harry takes up all the oxygen in any given room so it's going to be jean + Hypothetical Third supplicating to harry, essentially, and jean is going to make it known that he is NOT happy about sharing, but he's gonna put up with it anyway because harry threatens to leave him if he doesn't (harry wouldn't actually leave jean, they're too deeply enmeshed, there's too much between them. but he has no problem threatening to.) and neither jean nor harry will ever say they're in a relationship because that would be GAY, but they sure act like it, because if one of them ever gets attention from anyone else, the other one will immediately get jealous and defensive and possibly try to drive that 3rd away. even if they managed to get a 3rd involved who they did both like, i still think they'd be like 80% about each other and maybe a generous 20% towards that 3rd, so the 3rd would have to tolerate that. i guess also calling back to rene & gaston yeah i could definitely see them trying to take the Hypothetical Third for their own, but they'd be doing that to make the other jealous, not because they actually wanted the Third. anything that happens with that Third will always have some element of "is he looking? what is he thinking? what is he feeling?" like in the end it will always come down to the two of them and no one else.

[inbabylontheywept]

The Motherfucking Lizard King

No one at work trusts my boss. 

He's smart. He works hard. He's not trustworthy. He hasn't actually fucked anyone at work over, but he's ruined his last two marriages with affairs, and got dumped by his third fiance when he wouldn't sign a prenup. The fact that we all know this is just a hazard of working in a small town. 

Anyway: The thought process of the people in the lab is that if he screwed over his first wife, and his second wife, and was probably planning on screwing over his third wife, it would be insane for him not to screw us over. After all, what kind of idiot treats their employees better than their spouse? 

I dunno. His kind, I guess? He's had a few chances to fuck us over, and he hasn't taken them. Opposite really. When our parent company was doing furloughs, he stayed in the office almost a hundred hours, talking and talking and talking his way up the corporate ladder. And in the end, no one at our site got furloughed. 

He's pulled strings like that before. And it baffles me, right? Because it really does make zero sense. He'll move the heavens and the earth for us, but his wife and kids are afterthoughts. It feels like any moment, he's going to look into the mirror and realize how stupid that is. It feels like I'm betting on him making the same stupid mistake again, and again, and again - like it would be less cynical to believe he was, eventually, going to stab me in the back. But he hasn't yet, and as far as I can tell he's been making that mistake for close to fifteen years, and it's already cost him everything it can. If he was going to learn, he would have by now. 

So my position on him is that if he wanted to date someone I cared about, I'd warn them off. I don't trust him there. But I tentatively trust him to be my boss. Maybe one day he'll stick the knife in and twist, and everyone will say Ah, Babs, we warned you, but for now, I accept that he's doing a very predictable, very irrational thing, and I've made my peace with it. 

---

My job has glue traps. 

No one likes the glue traps, but we don't have a lot of options. Poison's banned by state law, spring traps are banned by company safety, and several non-lethal options tried in the past failed to work. The mouse problem can get pretty bad if it's ignored, and there's some real health hazards in that. Our site has never had a positive hantavirus test, thank God, but the big base about a half hour away has. That guy's gonna be on oxygen the rest of his life. 

If a mouse gets caught, we just euthanize it. But more than mice get stuck. Lizards can wander into those traps too, and the people working there have different feelings about the lizards. They don't pose nearly the same kind of risk mice do. They're chill little guys, and they keep the moths away, and they're just 

You know. They're friendly. There's something to be said about walking into a room, and hitting the light switch, and seeing two little guys on the wall start to do pushups as soon as they see you. 

People used to just euthanize the lizards too, but I had pet leopard geckos as a kid and I couldn't take that so I wound up googling how to free animals from glue traps. Now, when a lizard gets stuck in a trap - which happens once or twice a week - I get some vegetable oil from the breakroom, and a little plastic fork, and I'll spend fifteen to twenty minutes just kind of gently prying the little guys out. 

I have a team of technicians that help me operate one of the larger machines. They're real blue collar guys, ex-airforce, and they make me look like a little kid. Being an engineer means they'll look to me as a leader sometimes, which is a wild experience. And I started helping the lizards for my own conscience, but one of the crazier consequences of it has been that it seriously boosted my leadership cred. Because those guys see me, and they go: Hey. If he's willing to fight for a lizard, he's gotta be willing to fight for me. 

I cannot overstate how nice that is. Most engineers that want to make a change to a maintenance practice, or try an upgrade, they have to work their asses off to get the techs to buy in. But I can just ask. They already trust me to do good. They know I'm new, and they know I'm not the smartest engineer in the building, but they also know I'm the one who gets lizards out of the glue traps. 

And just because of that, they're willing to follow me. 

---

My boss has a meeting every month or two. It's typically basic house cleaning stuff - reminders about routines we've gotten lazy on, and updates on future projects. Maybe some warnings about problems coming from higher up in the company.

People are, in my opinion, a bit too cynical about the meetings. It stems from people not trusting our boss, which again, I understand, because it would make so much more sense if he wasn't trustworthy. It's a testament to the man's incredibly unhealthy priorities that he is. But as we made it to the end of the meeting, one of bullet points was: 

Do NOT mess with animals in the building. 

So I looked at my techs, and they looked at me, and when he got to the point, he was so scathing I actually just wanted to crawl under a rock and die. He said basically that he'd heard some reports about someone in the building handling animals that found their way in and got stuck, and that he just wanted to emphasize how insanely inappropriate that was, not to mention dangerous, and that if he needed to speak to anyone about it again, there would be severe consequences. 

I was willing to just take the shame and move on. I was. But one of my techs is old. Old enough he could've retired two years ago. And his actual literal goal is to one day get angry, yell at someone, and storm out. That's how he wants to retire. So instead of biting his tongue like everyone else, he stood up and said: I hate the glue traps. You hate the glue traps. We all hate glue traps. But we've all sat here for years, ignoring the little things that get stuck in them, watching them die, and then Bab's comes in, and he is the first person in decades to give enough of a shit to start pulling the lizards out. And I don't want him to stop. 

Get humane traps or shut up but we are not going back to the old way of just letting things starve. 

And my boss actually froze up. He got all wide eyed and stared at Marc, and then the other techs jumped in, and there was a very small but intense rebellion in the meeting and my boss kept trying to interrupt while getting absolutely bowled over by this gang of angry middle aged air force vets, and eventually he just went 

I will speak with Babylon about this afterwards! After! And then he will speak with everyone else, but I have more points to cover. 

So they went silent, and my boss rushed through the last five minutes, and we all adjounred. The techs really didn't like that I was going in alone - they thought our boss was going to try and shout me into compliance. Marc in particular was like, Look, if he tries bullying you, stand your ground, and if he threatens anything, just come get us, and we'll give him hell. 

So armed with that, I went to my boss's office. I sat in the chair across from him, and he kept his composure for maybe five seconds before just flopping back into his chair. 

I had no idea you were saving lizards, he said, but I'm glad you are. I always hated seeing them die in the glue.  

I wasn't expecting that. I was about to ask him what the comment from the meeting was about then, but he answered that before I even got the chance.

A snake got into the building last week, and - someone picked it up and chased a coworker around. Turns out that coworker was severely afraid of snakes, and now it's a shitshow. We're a small site, and now I can't ask those two to work together anymore, to say nothing about how the snake fared after all that. Being upset about that is a reasonable thing, right? 

And he gave me a look like he actually wanted an answer, so I said Yeah, totally, chasing a coworker around with a snake is a dick move. Especially if that coworker is already afraid of snakes. 

And he said Exactly! and then we sat there a few moments longer. He looked so incredibly tired that I did, actually, feel kind of bad for him. And then he somehow managed to sink even further into his chair, and said

Look, I know I'm not a good guy. But I'm not evil. I'm not some sort of crazy asshole that's going to demand that everyone watch lizards starve to death. When you go back downstairs, could you try to pass that on? That I'm not evil? 

I said Sure because it wasn't a hard request, and he looked relieved. I actually made it halfway out before I realized I had a question. 

Who grabbed the snake? I asked. 

Not supposed to talk about it, he said. But whoever comes to mind first is probably right. 

ThatGuy? I asked. And he looked me in the face, nodded his head yes, and said No. 

---

The techs seemed a little disappointed that they didn't get to storm the boss's office, but were otherwise in good spirits. They were actually a little bit embarrassed to hear about the snake story - apparently, it wasn't much of a secret. It'd just slipped their minds because it happened three weeks ago. 

We did maintenance after that, the same basic repairs we did every week. The meeting had been stressful and it was a relief to work with my hands. When the parts were reinstalled, everything cleaned and smooth and ready to go, Marc found me again. 

You know what the lesson of today is? he asked. And there were quite a few answers to that that I could have taken - from don't assume the worst of people to be careful with how you spend your trust - we all need it more than we think. 

But instead I said what? because I wanted to hear what his answer was going to be. 

That I got your back, he said. Then he clapped one very, very large hand on my shoulder, gave it a good squeeze, and walked back to dosimetry lab.

---

The next day, Marc gave me a package and told me to open it in my office. I was suspicious, but I followed the request.

Cardboard gave way to a small baggie, obviously full of fabric, which opened to reveal a t-shirt that read

"I Am the Motherfucking Lizard King."

I looked at it, I loved it, and then I got an idea. I went to my boss's office and knocked on the door. When he opened it, I asked him if he would be willing to allow something very unprofessional to happen for morale building purposes.

How unprofessional? he asked. I held the shirt up in answer. He gave the shirt a short look over and snorted.

You can wear it on weeks without customers, he said. Which just so happened to include that week.

I'll pass on that it came with your blessing, I replied, and he looked oddly relieved.

Thanks, he said. And then I went downstairs.

---

The techs were very, very happy to see the shirt. And while my boss's reputation remains in tatters, and probably will be until he moves (or dies), the next time there was a meeting, there was quite a bit less complaining about how mere presence. Which is, I guess, a start.

We'll see if he squanders it.

[l3irdl3rain]

Your place is already the Best Place for elderly cats, but I think it's especially so for Valentine with his dementia. There's plenty of comfy, warm spots, so he doesn't have to remember where one is; there's always food, so he doesn't have to worry about that either. Sometimes company passes through, suitable for a good cuddle or even a bath.

And then sometimes, when he's on one of the wide soft places, there's someone with a warm lap and clever hands, and he can wake up and go "Oh! There it is! I remember that!" and go snuggle.

We should all be so fortunate when we are old and tired and forgetful.

Thank you. I am so, so thankful and lucky that he has the kind of dementia where everything is good all the time. We've had to euthanize animals at the clinic before because they get senile and anxious and they just seem miserable all the time no matter what you do for them.

Valentine doesn't read any social cues from the other cats but for the most part everyone is nice to him. The only "bad" thing is he always thinks he needs to be fed. And then sometimes you feed him and he just looks at you all confused.

[all-pacas]

OKAY. 13 AND CHASE IN AFTER HOURS THO

The fact that when 13 needs help, she calls Chase. Why does she call him? Why doesn't she call someone else? She needs someone to deliver her a portable ultrasound, and okay, you could argue Foreman is a bad call because he's her ex and would pry. That House would just refuse. Taub would have been a good pick tbh, he would drop it off and just go home no questions asked. But no, she calls Chase

(And I love that call. "You doing anything?" "Oh, yeah, I'm just about to go out," Chase lies blatantly, asleep in bed with a book on the crusades on his chest. Like the loser he is. I don't know that it was done well but I love how S7 examines his Dumb Whore tendencies: it isn't really him, it's a rebound. He does it again when he gets stabbed.)

And of course the second he shows up he immediately sees through 13's excuses and pushes his way into the apartment. Because we love Chase's observation skills triumphing over his laziness.

13 tells Chase the prison backstory. Like! It's kind of glossed over. She hasn't told this to anyone else. She doesn't hide it. I killed my brother. It wasn't murder. Chase is just pacing, you just know he's twigged as hell, he's so anxious all at once as she tries to brush past it. The idea that 13 kind of had to tell him to explain Darrien's presence but she's also — House is the only other person who knows.

CHASE: Have you talked to anybody about it? I mean, are you okay?

Like we know this immediately triggered something in Chase, but 13 doesn't, and seeing him so anxious and pacing and ignoring the bleeding dying woman as 13 works, it's just. Incredible. It's good. He cares immediately, he's relating to this immediately.

But I love seeing them work together. Like they just immediately go in sync, Chase offering suggestions and 13 doing the work. They're just. It's nice.

SIDE NOTE: House says he called everyone before he called Cuddy. We see him call 13 and Taub. Chase is off picking up drugs, we don't see House call him, but like. He had to have called Chase first, right? Did Chase not pick up? Did he blow him off because he already was dealing with someone bleeding to death in someone's apartment??

The way they fight oh my god. The way 13 just is trying to fucking murder Chase. She punches him, she claws and shoves him, and then he just clocks her and stares horrified as she falls to the floor. Like it's an actual fight, it's brutal, it's so good. They hurt one another. I can't explain it but I love how brutal it is, that they both walk away with bruises, that it isn't pretty. Incredible. Amazing scene.

CHASE: You were defending your friend beyond all rationality, granting her the right to die in your bedroom. Was it really all because of a promise? 13: That word means something to some people. CHASE: Not that much. […] CHASE: You promised your brother you'd euthanize him and you think you won't feel bad about it as long as you can blame it on the promise. That's why you have this twisted obligation to keep all promises… or your carefully constructed defense mechanism could crumble down. 13: I saved my brother from a lot of pain.

!! Chase keeps bringing it up, he keeps bringing up her brother, not out of I can't believe you did a murder or I can't believe you went to prison but: you must hate yourself. He's calling her out on her coping mechanisms, he's calling her out on her guilt, and it's so fucking clear what he means is I get it but he's not saying that part. 13 killed her brother and now has to believe she did the right thing, no matter what, no matter how she feels. She's taking away her own agency: it was for a promise, it was his decision, she had nothing to do with it, it's fine, it doesn't feel bad. Chase killed Dibala and told himself it was for the greater good, it was morally just, it was the right thing to do, it doesn't feel bad. And it nearly destroyed him. And so he's pushing and pushing at it. He never goes 13 went to prison! he never goes it's so crazy you did that! Whenever he brings it up it's only in the context of how worried he is about her. Has she spoken to someone? Is she coping? Is this healthy? Is she okay? He's so worried. He cares so much.

I adore 13 and Chase running out of ideas with Darrien and calling dad. Most sibling coded of all time. Just. And the fact that House doesn't allude to also being in the hospital, actively bleeding and in pain, just, yes, we gotta help bail you two idiots out. Beautiful moment.

Chase getting 13 ice and coffee and still feeling guilty for punching her out, and 13 not blaming him at all. Like. You know. Don't beat people up. But in this one case I totally approve. Because I love it.

13: Darrien had to shoot that kid. It was the right thing. Completely justified. But it didn't matter. She destroyed her life trying to forget. I'm afraid that's what's gonna happen to me. CHASE: You really should talk to someone. 13: I've talked to a therapist. It didn't help. CHASE: Well, maybe you should talk to someone who isn't a therapist. 13: Do you really think you have any idea what it's like to live with something like this? CHASE: Let's grab a coffee.

Since the second Chase found out, this is what it's been leading towards. I love that he doesn't answer, he doesn't say a thing, but this is what he's been thinking all episode, why he's been pushing, why he's been so worried and caring: talk to me. Tell me you're not okay. Tell me everything isn't fine. And 13 holds it back until the end of the case, until it's over and she has no distractions. It's not at all clear Chase himself has talked to someone about Dibala, btw. He probably hasn't.

And how insane is that. He never told Foreman or House; they figured it out. He told Cameron: she left him. (Imagine being 13, hearing this. Realizing the timeline. She went to their wedding. What did she think happened when Cameron just … left? How quickly does she figure it out now?) House told Chase to talk to someone, Chase tried Confessing, but whenever he's tried to tell anyone it's gone terribly for him. I don't think he has talked to anyone. But he repeats House's advice to 13: talk to someone. (Talk to me.) He's offering her what he never got. And their situations are different, hers is much more sympathetic and easy to accept than his. Chase never goes I never got help or you have nothing to feel bad about or implies he doesn't think it's a big deal: his entire reaction is just empathy. He wants 13 to get what he didn't get, he wants to help.

The song that plays over the end of the episode is Bon Iver's Flume. And as much as you can apply it to House, and Cuddy, and Wilson, and all of that — it's a song about feeling isolated, feeling alone and being afraid of letting go. Of holding on to things that stain and hurt. The lyrics that play while 13 and Chase are having their coffee in the conference room, though:

i wear my garment/so it shows now you know

And I just! I love! Them! The ways 13 and Chase are so alike and so damaged, the way Chase reacts with empathy and care and wants her to have what he didn't, the way they know one another's secrets and worst moments and rely on one another so easily. 13's secrecy is a meme, in and out of universe, but Chase is absolutely no better: he won't even admit he's Catholic when talking to a nun. They're private to faults, they mask by sleeping around and taking risks and pretending not to care, they hide their hurts and then somehow, they punch one another in the face and know everything. I'm just. I'm so obsessed with them. I want them like this always.

[rowarn]

What shape/girth/length do you think the boys are packing? What are ur personal thoughts?

im rubbing my hands together like a fly as we speak. boy do i have THOUGHTS

i think i said this....somewhere.....maybe in DMs to someone BUT

konig........HEAVY cock. i mean like it's hefty. it hangs under his own weight when hard. fat and heavy i say!!!! uncut btw. nice, full, heavy balls !!!! im frothing. it hurts to take but its so worth it when he's halfway in and ur cumming ur brains out already and he's whimpering bc hes SURPRISINGLY SENSITIVE????????? those big, heavy balls slap against uR CLIT WHEN IN DOGGY?!?!?!?! omg i need to be euthanized

simon is thick and long and veiny. he's got the perfect upward curve that always lets him his ur g-spot when he's got u folded under him. DELICIOUS!!! his dick is............something. it's exquisite. god crafted him with special interest. uncut again it's just that vibe. he knows how to use it and its deadly

soap has got that coke can cock u know what i mean??? GIRTHY. if he slaps u with it, it will have force from how fucking fat it is omg. leaky cock too don't ask questions when he gets hard it starts DROOLING a fucking mess. his underwear will be a slick mess from all the precum WAH

price has an exemplary dick tbh. he's Older so he def knows how to use what he's got. hes not as big as simon or konig. his Older Man Syndrome makes it so that he can go for a LONG time before he cums. his sensitivity just isnt what it used to be u know what i mean? his cocks cut and he takes CARE of himself might i add!!!

GAZ!!! gaz is........omg if there was a competition for prettiest cock he'd win. it's something to marvel at!!!! a pretty, flared mushroom head and nice, sensitive balls. omg all of him is sensitive i swear!!! he moans so pretty when you mouth his balls and stroke his cock at the same time. not too veiny, not too big, not to girthy. it's a very nice, every day cock that anyone would enjoy bouncing on!!!! leaky cock 2, only second to soap btw

[the-last-thread-of-my-sanity]

I’ve been thinking lately about how much the ‘curse of Ymir’ really does affect the psyche of each of the nine shifters and how it impacts the ending of the story.

Up until the end of Season 3/Chapter 87-88, the reader and the viewer have no idea that the shifters have a limited amount of time to live. They seem to possess this god-like power and they can rejuvenate and survive almost any injury. They seem unstoppable.

This is what motivates Erwin to create a plan to take one of the nine shifter powers with the serum- having another Titan in your arsenal would make a difference in winning the war.

But what the Paradisians don’t know is how holding the power of the Nine just perpetuates a cycle of violence and cruelty. It’s a curse as much as it is a power. No matter how brilliant or grand your scope is for what you can do with this near limitless power, you have to contend with the fact that you will only have thirteen years to do it.

This revelation to me is the what colors the entire last arc of the story leading into and after the time skip.

For Zeke, it amps up the level of desperation he has for accomplishing the euthanization plan- relying on Eren was still a variable that was largely unpredictable, and he trusted him more than he probably would have if he weren’t running out of time.

Going back further in the story, it retroactively explains why Ymir (of the cadet corps) would go back with Reiner and Bertholdt at all- a seemingly nonsensical choice when it seems she has something to live for in her relationship with Krista/Historia. But Ymir knows she has little time left. She has no future. So she chooses to surrender.

For Annie, it shows her desperation to get back to her father, a man who showed her very little affection, and yet if she could just make it back maybe she could live at least a year or two with him and make at least one happy memory with the man who raised her to kill.

Armin, I honestly feel the most for, because what he and everyone else thought of as his salvation, was actually just saddling him with a curse. And heaps of responsibility to try and be grateful for it. He went from a character with a singular and wholesome conviction, to someone wracked with guilt and forced to solve the world’s problems with limited time and resources.

In Reiner’s case, I actually think the fact that he knows he is going to die is the only thing actually keeping him alive in the tail end of the story. He wants so badly to face retribution for his deeds, and he can only find the strength to keep towing the line because he knows his violent demise is guaranteed.

Characters like Pieck and Bertholdt seem to accept their lot in life- but deal with this internally and develop their own sense of morals despite it- albeit in different ways and in Pieck’s case with a shade of pessimism. Falco and Marcel stand out as a characters who see the farce for what it is- but still want to subject themselves to it in order to prevent someone they love from suffering through it in their place.

Eren, though, it’s easy to see how discovering he has already lived more of his life in powerless ignorance than what he has left is what ultimately causes the collapse in his character. Combine that with the way that he sees ‘future memories’ and doesn’t see any future beyond his own, and suddenly you have a naturally impulsive and violent person living in the most fatalistic reality ever. It makes perfect sense that his fall from grace is near immediate and precipitous.

What difference does all that power make if all it means is that you become a tool for destruction with no future? That you will be forced to curse someone else so that this cruel power will continue to exist? That is the true legacy of Ymir and the Eldian Empire- you can have near limitless power, but you will never have true control over your own life.

And it makes for such interesting discussions and questions about power and mortality and agency- and all the seemingly ‘correct’ and ‘incorrect’ ways to respond to their dilemma.

Anyway, it is always ‘thinking about the moral quandary of the titan shifters’ hours around here…

[tetsunabouquet]

Attack On Titan: Babydaddy Headcanons

A/N: This is just me thinking about how many they'd have, the gender and how they would raise them, etc.

Levi

-This man is a girl dad in the sense he only had one child and its a daughter. -It was a conscious decision. Whilst he loves you and would never deny you the joy of a child if you wanted to be a mom, he's also a man that lives a life of danger. Even if he's humanity's soldier, he has enough emotional awareness to know there are times where you or your daughter will worry and he wants to keep the number of people worried about him as low as possible. -He's not overprotective because she's an Ackerman but if someone even thinks of laying a hand on his daughter he'd chop their fingers off before they even reach her scalp. -As soon as she's old enough to fight, Levi will train her just like Kenny taught him because he knows the world is that cruel. However, any titan she interacts with until she's actually old enough to be a soldier will be none except for Hange's test subjects so she can see the danger she might choose with her own eyes to make an informed decision. -A secret reason he also shows her Hange's test subjects is that he wants to provide her with an example how not to interact with titans in Hange.

Eren

-Was a girl dad until his final kid popped out as a boy. -Armin pointed out the funny coincidence of his family unit being inverse to his own childhood; considering Grisha used to be a boy dad until adopting Mikasa. -Low-key looked good whenever his daughters would do his hair. Sometimes you wonder if looking like Carla is why Eren looks good with the sloppy feminine hairstyles. -He doesn't loves his son any less though. If anything, the way his daughters act towards him reminds him of how Mikasa used to treat him so whenever his son feels smothered, he understands his son and has his back. -In this scenario, his titan form obviously doesn't come with the 13 year curse limitations so he's somewhat worse as Levi when it comes to harming his kids. Because Eren would just squash them like bugs in his titan form.

Zeke

-Only becomes a father because he got drunk with you, who he already felt conflicted about loving. So like Levi, he makes the conscious decision to keep it at that one kid. -I do think Zeke would have a boy though. -He would play baseball with his son every day and try to be the father Ksaver was to him. -Zeke's plans to euthanize the Subjects of Ymir morphs into a plan to mutate all Subjects of Ymir into the same condition as the Ackerman clan and destroy the titan ability itself which would leave him as the final inheritor of the Beast Titan (speaking of which I might someday make a post with all the alternatives to the Rumbling that Isayama couldn't think of when he wrote himself into a corner) -Because of his negative experience with education and indoctrination, Zeke actually is an advocate for unschooling to a certain extent. He will teach his kid to read, write and basics but he's not fond of certain subjects like history because its in their world just filled with propoganda that Zeke is tired of.

Reiner

-Was very insecure about becoming a dad considering his own was happily a deadbeat but once he started having kids he couldn't stop at one so he had 4 kids. -Has two boys and two girls. -Because he was raised by a single mom, he works extra hard to be a good husband and father not just for the sake of the kids or his love for them. No, its also out of his devotion to you and not wanting you to know the hardships his mother faced in the slightest. -The sort of father who proudly displays the artwork of his children around his Vice Chief office at the Marleyan governmental building. -Teaches his sons to be better men and not make the mistakes he did as he teaches his daughters not to allow men to use them for their bodies in the way his mother was used and discarded. The way he goes about their gender roles and preparing them for life can be quite feminist for the time period AOT is set in but due to his upbringing and knowing so many powerful women, it shaped him quite a bit.

Armin

-A boy and a girl -Armin really wanted a mini you so when your first was a boy, he tried again and got what he wanted. -Not that he doesn't loves his son though, and thinks he's way cuter then he ever was as a child, which he reasons is your genetic makeup's doing. -Touch his children and he will find a way to poison you. He's way more clever and sneaky when it comes to taking revenge compared to Levi and Eren. -Similar to Reiner, he eats up anything his kids make and finds the most horrible drawings of a cat to be the best amazing artwork ever.

Erwin

-Just like Levi, being part of the scouts made him restrict himself to one child. -However, unlike Levi, he has a harder time as your child tempts him into wanting more of them as he loves seeing the union of yours and his features. -It's a boy -Hange often teases you and Erwin that he and Historia's daughter might become an item as they grew up together as babes of the Scouts regiment. -Has a habit of dropping asleep right next to his son after he's come home after a long day of titan slaying and reports about it.

[chuuyascumsock]

Whoever asked for more Milf/Dilf Reader x Characters— what about the Gilfs?

What about Gojo telling you “I’m going to fuck this pussy/ass so hard it’s going to cremate”?

What about Tojo only being in it for the life insurance and calls you his “little hag”?

What about Geto already planning on finding places that will euthanize you because he thinks the elderly needs to be put down after 60?

What about Nanami being there because in order to be a Boy Scout leader he needs to get his “helping the elderly” badge?

What about Choso who needs someone to make him milk and cookies and knit him ugly Christmas sweaters?

What about Sukuna planning on having you burned at the stake because it’s tradition back in his day to light the respected elders on fire to sacrifice for the people? (He just wants to see someone on fire.)

[hopelessdelusional]

matt sturniolo x influencer! reader

︵‿︵‿୨♡୧‿︵‿︵

reader is grunge! a singer! and on social media (this is very niche i apologize) i will be building this AU more so stay tuned!

｡･:*˚:✧

hey so i’ve hyper fixated onto an CIS. STRAIGHT. WHITE. BOY. someone put me down i cannot do this anymore please this is a cry for help needs to euthanize me-

｡･:*˚:✧

enjoy ദ്ദി(｡•̀ ᗜ^)

join the taglist

·˚ ༘₊· ͟͟͞͞꒰➳ homebase

to start, you have been close friends with jake for a long time, and thru him you met tara and johnny before meeting the triplets

jake pretty much always has you in his videos, so much so whenever you aren't in a video the fans have started to request for your presence on videos that don't have you in them

you're not all that active on social media, only posting random covers of your favorite songs on your youtube channel and random tiktoks

in jake's videos you are always making him laugh, and out of the two you're more calm with a dry sense of humor

'...do you like it?"

"yeah because me immediately spitting it out and chugging my drink after eating it obviously shows how much i love this fucking candy"

OR

"hey jake did you want to get dinner tonight-"

"..."

"why the fuck is johnny in a baby costume."

in tara's videos you and her literally talk for HOURS and the way tara could make four separate videos from one recorded hang out is ridiculous

with Carrington the two of you easily match each other's energy, always giggling in the back of videos

you've also done singing collabs with jake and johnny! there are a couple of songs that just have your background vocals and then others with actual verses

you haven't released any songs though due to stress and anxiety, feeling too pressured to write the

"perfect" song so you settle with being a feature

besides that you really just mind your business with college, your job, and hanging out with friends

tara was actually the one who introduced you to nick

and through nick….you met matt

.・。.・✭・.・✫・゜・。.

matt who was excited to meet nick’s new friend who he was talking abt nonstop

“hey guys! yn is here!”

nick swings the door wide open, smiling widely as he stomps in the house. you follow in quickly, nervous to meet nick’s brothers. your friendship with nick came naturally, having many things to connect with. that being said, you weren’t sure if you could create a relationship with his brothers as easily as you did with him.

fiddling with your clothes you wave politely at the boys, surprised to see both of them walk up to you and hug you. granted it was swift hugs, but it immediately created a softer environment, causing you to relax immensely.

matt who immediately noticed how you looked uncomfortable and took the first step to hug you

“i like your outfit,” matt said after chris broke away from you. he gave you a small smile, making you smile in return. before you could respond however, chris started talking to the group.

nick had already decided on having dinner at home, so you settled in leaning on the kitchen island watching nick and chris argue over what to make for dinner. matt walks over to you, putting his hands in his pockets.

“don’t worry i could never replace you guys,” you tease, when you see him across from you. he giggles in reaponse, his eyes never leaving your face.

“cool tattoos,” he points out which surprised you. looking down at your arm, you smiled admiring the work you’ve gotten done over the years.

“thank you! you also have some gnarly tats.”

matt smiled at you, flexing his arm a little bit to show off his whole sleeve.

“is that the only place you have tattoos?” you question, suddenly curious about his body art. matt nodded, then looked at you with a small smile.

“does that mean you have more?” the question made you laugh because he seemed almost shy asking you, so when you nodded enthusiastically and started to give him a quick tour all over your body. lifting your shirt up was funny for you, because you could tell matt wanted to be thoughtful and not look but when you reassured him he hesitated at first but eventually awed at them. his reactions were so lively, making you appreciate how focused and compassionate. he praised you for your own ideas and for the tattoos that meant something, and still thought your random and silly tattoos were interesting.

after you finished showing him you were practically gleaming, it had been a while since you had been able to speak so much of the tattoos that littered your body. every single one of them had meant so much to you and being able to share that with someone; especially someone as excited and appreciative as you are.

“you’re really cool, i can see why nick enjoys hanging out with you so much.”

you and matt were sitting down in the living room now, leaving chris and nick to prepare dinner for the evening. talking came easily after the tour of your tattoos, matt showing you his and the conversation flowed better than you dreamed it to be.

you chuckled at matt’s comment, finding his eye contact was making you squirmish in your seat.

“nick is so much cooler than me, but i don’t mind i really enjoy being friends with him. plus now i have two new friends so that’s a bonus.”

matt laughed at your response, running a hand through his hair now avoiding eye contact with you.

“yeah, i’m grateful nick brought you around.”

matt who couldn’t take his eyes off of you for the rest of the evening, which did not go unnoticed by his brothers

“don’t steal my new best friend from me matt!” nick yelled out dramatically after yn left, making matt shake his head.

“you should let matt have their number,” chris mumbled, still focused on the game he was playing. nick gasped dramatically before agreeing, making the boys laugh with how quickly he switched up his emotions.

“just don’t steal them!” nick threatened, but matt was already too excited to text you to listen.

matt who got your number and could not stop texting you, and he especially couldn’t stop smiling every time you texted him back

“matt i need backup,” chris said frantically, his eyes glued to the computer and fingers moving at the speed of light on the controllers. when matt doesn’t respond, chris huffs and repeats himself.

“matt seriously dude where the fuck are you?!”

matt finishes up typing and looks up, oblivious to the game that they were losing.

“oh shit,” he mumbled, putting his phone down and picking his controller back up.

“you weren’t even playing?” chris yelled out, frustrated with their status. nick pipes up from the bed, suddenly curious. he peaks his head over and sees matt’s phone light up, watching matt immediately lose his focus to look at his phone. matt straightens up, wanting to reach for his phone before chris cursed loudly, drawing his attention away from the text. nick squints, thankful that he was wearing his glasses and sees the name on his phone to his disbelief. yn sent a text, then another one, and then another one. his jaw dropped, and his gasp was so loud it startled his brothers.

“nick! oh my god,” chris started to laugh when his fear settled down. nick still had his mouth wide open, only causing chris to laugh harder.

“you’re gonna catch flies kid,” matt snickered. nick slowly turned his head to matt, mouth still open, in a very dramatic motion.

“yn? you stole my best friend?”

matt froze, a slow blush creeping up from his neck to his cheeks. chris eyed his brothers from his peripheral vision, jaw also dropping.

“that’s why you’ve been so preoccupied? damn my boy has a crush,” chris started to chuckle, causing nick to scream and matt to drop his controller covering his face in embarrassment.

matt who gets jealous whenever you and nick go out like he wants to hang out with u too :(

matt who finally gets the nerve to ask you to hang out with him, after nick decides he’s had enough of matt complaining about how “you never invite me-or chris!” (he has to add the chris part to not sound too obvious)

matt stood nervously at the door, fiddling with his keys in his hands. he finally knocked, immediately hearing rummaging around behind the door. matt couldn’t help but smile, wondering what you were doing right now. were you just as nervous to hang out with him one on one?

suddenly, the door swings wide open, and you’re in the doorway smilingly widely.

“hey! come in!”

matt who had so much fun hanging out with you.

the two of you went to antiques and thrift stores, grabbed some dinner and went back to your place to spend the rest of the evening together. the two of you got along so well he ended up staying until 12AM because you wanted to finish watching the show you started, not that matt was complaining. he was tempted to ask to stay over (and you were tempted to ask him to stay over) but he didn’t want things to be awkward. so he left late into the night, after you gave him a tackling hug, asking to hang out again soon

matt who started to call you every night, and although you two texted all day you never ran out of things to talk about.

matt who is really starting to fall for you

.・。.・✭・.・✫・゜・。.

k bye ily🩶

[gabessquishytum]

Johanna is a catpeople rights activist. So many humans treat them as their property and sex toys, but catpeople have feelings. Jo is appalled by this whole situation, and she does what she can to find foster homes and, eventually, new (good!) owners for catpeople in trouble. When she learns about catboy!Dream, it's an emergency. Dream attacked his owner, Roderick Burgess. Burgess was emotionally and physically abusive, but the law is not on Dream's side - if no one volunteers to take him in and work on his 'socialization,' he's about to be put down. They're already running out of time - since Burgess is severely injured (maybe he has his eyes clawed out?), it is ruled that Dream is highly dangerous and has only a few hours left to live. Johanna won't let anything happen to this traumatized catboy. Not on her watch! She already has a foster catgirl at home, Rachel, and she can't take another because Rachel needs much care and attention (they also might be heading somewhere romantically, so Jo doesn't want to fuck it up by bringing another catperson onto her territory), so Johanna asks her bff for a favor. Hob Gadling is well off financially, can take a vacation without notice because he is a business owner, and he's naturally friendly. Also, he lives alone - no human or cat partner in the picture. He's not very delighted with the prospect of taking Dream in at first, but Johanna really insists. So they come to pick Dream up and see him in a dire condition: bruised, injured, and malnourished, he hisses at everyone who even tries to come close to his cage. A cage?? Hob has never been involved with catpeople before, and activism has been entirely Johanna's shtick, but he quickly realizes how blind he's been. Hob organizes the best medical care for him, orders all the decent books on catpeople to educate himself, and buys all the stuff Dream might need. Dream is stunning and very clever, and his previous owner obviously was a sadistic prick. Hob wishes he could claw the fucker's eyes out himself when he sees the extent of Dream's injuries and starvation. Dream is very tense and afraid at first, but as time goes by, and Hob treats him like a person, he starts to hope that maybe he's found not only his forever home but also someone to love him this time.

New catperson owner Hob treating Dream just like he's a person - a person who deserves respect, personal space and love!!! When he goes to buy new catperson stuff for Dream, he's kind of disgusted by the fact that it's all spiked collars and wet food. Hob hates it. He walks right out the store and just goes to the normal shop instead. He gets nice comfy clothes, bedding, proper food with lots of protein. He organises a proper bathing and toileting situation for Dream in his own bathroom which Hob only goes inside to clean. Just decent stuff that any sentient being deserves.

Dream doesn't know what to make of it at first. He's gone from being moments away from being euthanized, to being allowed to just kinda... do what he wants?? He has privacy, good food, healthcare, and very pleasant company in the form of Hob. Because Hob is so kind. He takes care of Dream’s injuries and nurses him through the initial stages of refeeding. He lets Dream snuggle up to him under 3 blankets because he's so cold, still shivering sometimes. He never makes Dream do anything (except take his medication, which is very important), but he doesn't ignore him either. Dream has to wonder - is this what it's like to have a friend?

Dream recovers slowly, but he does gradually start to thrive. He wears comfy shorts and big hoodies, and takes long naps in the sun that pours through the window in the bedroom every morning. He eats fresh food that Hob gets at the market every day. He's finally learned to read! Sometimes he feels like he must have died and gone to heaven. But then the dog next door barks at him and reminds him that life is not quite perfect - but almost.

His relationship with Hob evolves slowly. They share a bed and cuddle up every night (Hob tolerates Dream’s 3am zoomies pretty well by now - they now have a treadmill for that exact purpose). Dream is also generally naked in bed, which has lead to one or two moments. The mutual attraction is undeniable. Hob just doesn't want to take advantage...

Luckily Dream is prepared to make the first move. He's a person, and that means that he's capable of choosing a life partner. It just so happens that he's choosing Hob. He's going to need some practice with kissing (he's not quite sure whether or not he's meant to bite?) but he's sure that Hob will be patient with him. He has been so far. And to Dream, that patience feels a lot like love.

[punkrogue]

ended up thinking about the magneto + wanda vs charles + david dichotomy and --

(house of m #1 / way of x 2 + 4)

magneto is 100% not a great dad and even HE knows it and he KNOWS he's put his war before his kids but at the end of the day he does love and care for them and has wanda's state deteriorates he both tries to help her bc she just fucking DESERVES it and also falls the helplessness of someone who just cannot find a solution but so desperately wants one. it's shitty that he has her manipulate things into a mutant utopia but idk man it was kind of a dogshit situation already. I mean people are literally planning to euthanize her and given how things are going at that particular moment there's almost an argument for it. what a horrific position for him to be in as a father and a father who's trying to do at least a little for his kids to make up for YEARS of being the WORST. he WANTS wanda to have a life, even if he's not allowed in it.

MY MAN EGG CHARLIE THO-- he has a similar kid. mentally unstable reality warper. has literally reshaped related twice with his unending bullshit. david is back and FULLY in his "i rule me" era. which is when he's the most together and lucid. He's as on top of his mental issues as possible and RIGHT out the gate xavier has decided he's too dangerous to live. he refuses to return david's consciousness to his body. when david does it himself charles suspects HIS OWN SON of being the psychic poison corrupting kraoka and when david refuses to tell him what he's plans are and simply asks his father to trust him because he's his son charles violates his autonomy and tries to hack his mind. (i know xavier's getting onslaughty but also.... lbr.... it's not off brand for him to pull something like that)

like-- i'm not a charles xavier hater but i'm a charles xavier hater you know? i love david so much and charles is such a deadbeat dad. i also think this is just-- it's very telling of the differences between mags and xavier. magneto will put his mission above all 9/10 but when dealing with a situation like these it's VERY clear that it's killing him and WANTS to resolve it in the less harmful way. meanwhile charles would prefer his son back in a coma before he's shown even a SECOND of supposed instability than allow him a life because of "what he might do to the mission". like no one here is getting the dad of the year award but jfc charles is sooooooo good at rationalizing and stomaching doing horrific shit to his own kid(s) just bc they're not controllable or palatable.

[astirysk2electricboogaloo]

p'nut (peanut) the squirrel and fred the raccoon were murdered by the new york state department of environmental conservation. these animals were not wild or rabid.

as if coming to kidnap someone's pets wasn't bad enough, the way they went about it was fucking ridiculous. they raided and ransacked mr. longo's house for 5 hours. in that time, the nysdec escorted mr. longo to the bathroom and back, checked the back of the toilet to see if he was hiding anything and wouldn't let him feed or give the other animals in the their care water. the longos were treated like drug traffickers because they had a squirrel and a raccoon.

supposedly when the agents took p'nut he bit one of them. i understand the concern after a bite, HOWEVER:

both of these animals lived with humans. when they weren't in the house in their own separate rooms they were in an enclosure. they were not running through the woods unsupervised. these animals were not coming into contact with animals that were actually wild. an outside farm cat would encounter more wild animals than these two would have.

no one, animal or human, were showing symptoms of any illness.

neither fred nor p'nut were showing symptoms of rabies.

they could have been quarantined and observed for a set amount of time to determine if they had rabies. the person who was supposedly bitten would have been vaccinated after a "wild animal" bite immediately anyway. if they had rabies the treatment would have already started, if they didn't then they would have just been vaccinated against rabies. it would not have killed anyone to wait till quarantine was over before making the decision to end their lives. killing p'nut and fred was not necessary.

fred was a high risk animal, but he wasn't the one that supposedly bit. p'nut wasn't even high risk.

(https://sciencing.com/signs-symptoms-rabies-squirrels-5578992.html)

and it was bullshit anyway because the agents raiding the house were in thick protective gloves and the longos never witnessed a bite happen.

some jackasses had reported mr. longo to the dec before about p'nut before fred came to live with them and then reported them about fred. some piece of shit targeted p'nut deliberately, and the authorities used it to raid and ransack the longos' house while:

not wearing their body cameras. (wonder why that is)

asking the longo's if they had security cameras and where they were. (why?)

interrogating mrs. longo over her immigration status. (also, WHY?)

below are links to news articles and a gofundme. the longos are pursuing legal action.

[thejujvtsupost]

Hi! I saw your requests and can I just ask a little red riding hood au where reader is little red and geto/gojo/nanami/toji are the wolves that eat you (out).

[They don't have to be literal wolves but just as wild. U can pick one but if you want to write for more than one it would be great]

Good Enough To Eat 18+ mdni

Anon your brain is beautiful! This was originally for Halloween, but my I present: full moon Nanami 😌

Notes: F!reader, sex in the woods, prey/predator play(+dom/sub?), oral (F receiving), light breeding kink bc it’s Nanami, minor injuries, reader is consenting/discussed beforehand- consent is v sexy!

Someone did a public service and pulled an audio of Nanami’s heavy breathing and I need to be euthanized. I’d also like to dedicate this to @pseudowho because they’re always on top of the Kento Agenda and sharing the audio with them was a MUST. Like that’s literally our husband. 💗

You weren’t sure how long you were running with your picnic basket but you couldn’t catch your breath.

You couldn’t stop, either.

What started out as a simple evening picnic in the woods with your lover turned into a chase, as you ran for your life.

Kento… Kento was different from other husbands…

His unique qualities weren’t a hindrance to your relationship aside from the few times a year his instincts took over- and the heightened senses around the full moon. Even then, you both were so careful to avoid any accidental injuries. His body was far stronger than yours, with his heightened strength and lack of restraint being around him during his most vulnerable moments was dangerous.

“You can’t run forever, my love. I can smell you…”

Despite his taunts you refused to respond. He would catch up eventually but you didn’t want to make things worse by alerting him with your voice.

Unfortunately, between the blood pounding in your ears and lack of oxygen in your lungs, you lost your balance and tripped over an exposed tree root- with a twisted ankle, you were now dinner.

“Poor thing, that looked painful. Let me see it.”

Kento sounded calm but you knew the truth. Inside he was a simmering, insatiable, beast that already expressed its intentions of eating you.

He was getting closer and closer with his inhuman speed, you tried to get up and run but he had you pinned face down to the forest floor in seconds. Fuck.

“Got you.”

His voice was raspy in your ear as he started mouthing at your neck, “Gonna take you apart right here, right now. Feel how ready I am to take you?”

And you did, his cock was straining in his pants when he harshly ground against your ass. Impatiently, he pulled your hips up and adjusted your legs, keeping a hand on your back to maintain a good arch. The draft of the cool night air hit the back of your thighs, reaching higher when Kento flipped your dress up.

“No panties huh? You like being a wet whore don’t you? Running through the woods from a beast and leaking from your cunt.” He leaned down to inhale your scent close to the source and growled. “This pretty cunt needs filled up.”

You couldn’t help but feel a little bit of shame at how turned on you were by all of it.

A high pitched mewl left you as his tongue flicked across your clit from the back, feeling the way it throbbed each time it lashed against you. His lips sealed around your sensitive nub, alternating between slurping up your growing arousal and suckling your clit.

Your body was on fire, pussy clenching, needy for him to fill you. “Kento please!”

With one last smack of his lips he moved his body over yours, completely dwarfing you under him and tangling your fingers together. “Gonna get you full of me, breed this pretty pussy.” His cock brushed against your folds for a moment before he thrusted into you in a single breath.

If you weren’t so wet, the stretch wouldn’t be as pleasant. Unlike now, when your eyes were rolling back from the feeling.

You could feel his cock grow harder, stretching you, his swollen tip rubbing against the spongy spot in your cunt, making you leak around him.

He’s panting in your ear, needing you to milk his cock, your whimpered moan of his name only spurring him on more. He moved your legs higher to fuck you deeper, thrusting into you in the most animalistic manner you’ve ever experienced with him. With every pass, he hit his target. You knew your knees would be bruised by morning and it would be a welcomed mark.

His grunting and panting rivaled your moans as you grew close to your peak- he wasn’t far behind you with the way your cunt was fluttering and slicking.

“Kento- gonna!” You couldn’t finish your sentence before you released around his cock, soaking the dirt beneath your bodies.

“Yeah that’s it, come baby.” He roared, spilling his spend into you with a few sloppy thrusts before stilling, his cock throbbing with its own heartbeat, an endless stream of cum filling your pussy.

He pulled out once his breath was even and carefully flipped you over, “Are you okay, sweetheart? Hurt anywhere?”

Your eyes were still glassed over when you smiled all dreamy at him. “We gotta do that again.”

Kento fixed his clothes with a chuckle and gathered you in his arms, putting the little picnic basket in your hands as he carried you back to the car.

He buckled you in and held your hand to his lips when he got in the drivers seat. “How about a hot bath and some ice for that ankle when we get home?”

While worth it, you’d definitely feel deliciously sore tomorrow, deciding then to take the day off work.

[kiawren]

Wren is usually pretty confident in expressing himself. EXCEPT THROUGH DANCE. THIS BOY CANNOT DANCE. And you know what Kiawe struggles with expressing himself through the Least? DANCE.

Ok but seriously I cannot for the life of me dance I just cringe at imagining myself dancing like any form of dance. I know it's fun to get physical but I don't know I just get a bit embarrassed and I'm not good at memorising dance steps most times.

I think Kiawe is most interested in Austronesian dances especially cuz Wren wants to learn the history too so he learns them to show him.

BUT how can someone like dance so much and not be curious about the popular western classics... The Waltz....

Of course he read up the steps at least once... And again after thinking about Wren. And thinking how best to ask them if they want to dance with him sometime. But Wren already said they're bad at dancing! So maybe they don't want to do it...

Well maybe one day Wren just asks "Do you know how to dance the Waltz" and Kiawe's a bit too quick to say Yes. And he clears his throat like yes. I know it well enough. <- he knows it Too well lol he's good at memorising dance steps (though his fire dancing mostly just needs repetition and immense skill of a set moves, he watches lots of types of dances and remembers a lot of moves) and he stared at the steps for the Waltz on his computer for like 20 mins he already memorised it but he was just picturing him and Wren doing it then he got so embarrassed about it.

Well so Wren agreed to do it (secretly also wanted to do this romantic thing) with Kiawe's guidance and he's so eager but he teaches them really slowly. AND WREN TAKES FOREVER TO LEARN FUCK and maybe at one point they're just really confused staring at their feet like "Ok give me a second to see where to step" and Kiawe looks at them staring so hard at their feet and the floor like Haha... he is so cute

Wren keeps getting it wrong and goes like Ok maybe let's just do it another day and Kiawe's like Noo... I promise you can learn it... And I guess he eventually does and Kiawe is so happy. <- finding more partner dances to teach Wren sometime

I need to be euthanized goodnigh

[necros-writing-stuff]

Yaaay Necro is back! Drop us some more Eden or Dare content to drool over! MOOOOOAAAARRR!!! It's never enufff!! Neverr!! Also someday can't promise when I'll get around making fanart for both and you'll be the first to see! If only my brain can pump some juice oho~ pump

More is always coming, don't you worry! Also I'd be honored to see the art, thank you very much for loving Dare enough to do that!

Okay okay so. Old dog man Darius. Retired (fired) police dog. Caucasian Shepherd.

Was a great working dog until one day he turned around and savaged his handlers arm. No one could figure out why, and he was about to be euthanized, until you came along and promised that you could safely house and care for him.

These dog people are much more intelligent than the general public believes, you know that. It's cruel how they're treated. The least you can do for Darius is provide him a safe place to recuperate until he can find a permanent home.

Or rather, that was the plan. Darius decided he'd never be leaving. This is his home now, and more importantly, you're his fucking mate.

The neighbours shudder in fear everytime they pass, Dare's ever watchful gaze glaring at them from the window. Any one of them could be a threat. His skin itches, the urge to snarl and bark to make them all leave powerful in his mind. But he's aware you could get evicted for that. So he stays in his spot, watching.

When he's not at the window, he's following you around. Satisfied and content as you make his food, always the absolute best diet you can manage for him. Always delicious. You aren't afraid to pet him, either, scratching at his chin before he rests it on top of your head so he can better see what your hands do as you work away at the stove.

He can't help how he hardens when you're so close. He's from a good breeding line, so he was never neutered like many other dog men. Your empathy for him and acknowledgement of his intellect stopped you from chopping the boys off, too. You could have. Hell, the vet recommended it.

But you ignore his less than sneaky humping at your backside. Just gentle little motions at first, testing you to see how you'll react. Most of the time you do act like nothing is happening, other times you give an excuse of needing your space for this or that to make Dare back away.

He's frustrated, you'd argue to yourself. He doesn't fully comprehend what he's doing. Not like dog people are taught sex ed like humans are. You add it to your list of things to approach him with. He's a diligent student in that class, already surprisingly knowledgeable in some parts but missing gaps elsewhere. His dry humping doesn't cease. If anything, now he's becoming bolder. Nuzzling against your neck, licking at the skin there and giving you hopeful eyes. But the answer is still no.

You're his guardian. You own him by law for God's sake. It's not fair. But maybe you can find him another dog person to be with, someone who wouldn't have power over the sweet old dog man.

It was the morning he woke up to find you cooking in nothing but one of his shirts that he snapped and just gave in altogether. Not the best mental health week for you. You'd lacked on laundry, he didn't know how the machine worked (you'd tried explaining, he just "never got it" - aka, didnt want to), so you'd thrown on one of his clean t-shirts to sleep. You'd do the washing today, had to, but breakfast was always first.

Poor thing. So tired, so lost in your own head that you aren't aware of the looming body behind. Darius practically salivated at what he was seeing, his tail wagging and his ears pricked forward. He's not one for oggling legs, they're just a body part, but yours look amazing that morning. There was no hesitation as he sank to his knees behind you, lifting the hem of his shirt to expose your core to his hungry eyes.

People ask you all of the time if you're scared that if Darius, as big and strong as he is, decided to attack you, you wouldn't be able to fight him off. You'd always laughed it off. You weren't now. Not with his hot tongue lapping incessantly against your hole, one arm pinning you to the counter (and keeping you bent at an angle) as the other holds a leg still. No, you're stuck whimpering and moaning.

The sounds it makes is obscene, the wet smacks too loud in your ears. Darius is ravenous in how he devours you, how his tongue pokes, prods and flicks, his lips suckling and kissing until your legs feel weak and you orgasm right there against the counter. Darius has to slowly lower you to the floor with him, pulling you into his lap as you both catch your breath.

"You-you can't do that again, Dare. It's not okay, its-"

"Mates take care of each other, no? You're less stressed now, aren't you? What's the big deal?"

There's no getting through to him. Not a chance. He's a dog with a bone, and he certainly has a resource guarding issue.

[jrueships]

tag yourself as some of my favorite players except if you can tag yourself, you may need help . Ignore the pronouns lol

Jaboobi

doesn't know how to hold a proper conversation if it doesn't involve at least one special interest

picky eater

do NOT interrupt when in the middle of doing one out of the many favorite monotonous tasks, WILL kill you

still has to hold mommy's hand when nervous

kills people who call sports 'sportsball'

actually really nice when not pissed off 24/7

' i don't have anger issues and to show how i don't have anger issues, i am going to roll this Giant Boulder over a Small Village.'

adopts random things/people when he doesn't know what to do with his life

Gay Bear

Says eep

Finds the lack of an amygdala extremely attractive

Considered a vip at furcon

Voted best babysitter in hometown, should be a school teacher if the economic state of the world wasn't corrupt

Repeats jokes that fail until someone pity laughs, will frantically look around to find anyone who might find it funny

Unironically exclaims 'it's so preppy in here!!!'

Should wear a shirt that says 'warning, will leap into your arms when frightened and WILL expect the catch to be bridal style on the whim'

Nba youngboy

' i can say 'OMG' bcs 'OMG' to me isn't an insult to God, it is my Friend'

Invites himself to parties

Eavesdrops with eyes as big as saucers and mouthing surprise. Shocked to find out his spying has been discovered

Will argue with you while holding a popsicle in the hot sun

Shameless when it comes to the opportunity of social media account growth

Would ask a stranger if they had a hysterectomy because they give hysterectomy vibes

Tried to use an egg as a drum and was surprised when it cracked

Gamer Twink

Kink is people that could kill him

Over-the-top filters over any image taken by a camera is more useful and used than oxygen

Has to do The Thinker pose when thinking

If he can't have his daily little treat or life reward for being alive on earth, considers k*lling himself

Never knows what's going on until he hears one word of what could be news and then acts like he was the primary witness at the scene

'I do really good voice impressions, wanna hear?' 'Not rea-' 'hi im spongebob'

Says 'ggs' after sex

Drew

'Skibidi toilet rizz!'

Will make a random sound. Look at you in morbid silence. Waddle away

Texts using only a single pointer finger while squinting

that one Tiktok of that one ruff n tumble man who lives in the desert and acts very disgruntled by the fact that he has now adopted a stray kitten who's crawled into his trailer, ignoring the fact that he's immediately spoiled it with a million toys and the best food, water, and care possible

Has to be euthanized to be stopped from telling people 'don't fall in' when they say they have to go use the toliet

' not reading that, sorry, not reading that, sorry, ... squeak now or forever hold your cheese ? LOL! liked :] ! ...not reading that, sor-'

Behind those beautiful doe eyes.. is a man so horny ..

Reeses Puffs

Considers 'ya'll' a worthy word to be written in all essays

Hates being hugged but loves giving hugs

Mystified by magic shows

Superhero media lover till he dies

Walks into random conversations already laughing then asks 'what's up :D!! What's funny! What are we talking about :D!!' After the people go silent bcs who tf is this

People think he's innocent from his humor but is actually very messy and lovesss listening to drama

Refers to his pets as his children

Doesn't know what a vacation is

Poo Dirt

' im not going to speak to you.. im just going to Stare at you. And hope. You are a telepath.'

Wants a bad gf but would fumble her so badly

Thinks beastmode is still a thing in 2024

Has like two friends in his phone. The rest of the texts are from his family

Quietly clingy

Scary looking bitch who is actually quite soft and enjoys watching a good episode of bluey after work

'Hey guys' *chat dies*

Doesn't know how to end conversations. Just kind of. Wanders off

Faggant

Having sex with himself would fix him

Doesn't know how to admit when he likes new things. Has to make fun of it first

Would move mountains for a goth bitch

Just Laughs and automatically agrees to things when he doesn't know wtf you're talking about

'Imma be honest... i stopped listening to what you had to say and started thinking about how quiet this restaurant got after that one noisy ass messy ass etiquette lacking ass family left 35 minutes ago, sorry'

Gets ice cream at crumbl cookie

Gets lost going to crumbl cookie

Doesn't want to say anything about that

Jdumb

Used to be that one kid who would immediately t-pose when he recognized his friend in the hallway

^ weird

His fashion and hair IS his emotional state right now

Haahahaa :]!! *face drops* im going to Kill you.

Attends the movie theater in full-out cosplay

'Milk does not belong in cereal'

^ sicko