#someone has said this before so I'm not taking credit I just want to reiterate it because i love it sm

[jcs-singular-slut-strand]

L*n W*ngji doesn't laugh at Wei Wuxian's jokes because they're all perfectly crafted to Jiang Cheng's humour 😌

[golbrocklovely]

Didn’t Elton trash Colby’s first car and asked to show his wrists when he knew he was harming himself?

All in all. I watch both accounts but Elton is just crazy. I also think he’s desperate to prove himself and to prove the paranormal like Sam. But then again, they both want to spread a message. But they both differ I guess.

He was at the Hellfire 3 days after I went there. So crazy!

this turned into such a rant omg i'm so sorry

he did wreck colby's car, but a lot of us personally believe he actually just trashed a car that looked like colby's since in the end he "gave" colby a car that look suspiciously like his and was just slightly nicer looking.

and the wrist thing NEVER happened. i've had to reiterate this on several occasions so if i seem a bit snippy about it, my apologies. but this has never happened. colby has never self harmed before, and elton has never made him show scars… since they don't exist.

here's where the rant starts in case anyone wants to read it:

the only reason this rumor infuriates me so much is that it wasn't until last year that ppl started talking about it and bringing it up but there is literally NO PROOF of it's existence. and when you ask ppl where they heard it from, they say "oh someone said it was in a video that got removed" or you also get "someone said it was in a livestream that's been deleted". my issue with this is that the last time snc collabed with elton was in 2019. and it took until 2022 for anyone to talk about this event. if that's the case…. you don't think someone would have brought it up before?? like the ENTIRE fandom just let elton make colby "show" self harm scars and it took three years for anyone to say that wasn't cool? if it happened in a livestream, which notoriously never gave saved or screen recorded all that often, how do you know it happened unless you were there and watched it and WAITED three years to say something about? and if it was in a video that only got deleted recently, no one… not a single person…. recorded it??? i've been in the fandom since 2018, this did not occur bc i've heard NOTHING about it ever until 2022 and the only place i've heard it from is tiktok.

idk who started the rumor, but i really wish they didn't. bc elton is an asshole for a lot of reasons, but this is not one of them.

sorry this is turning into a rant about elton and the tiktok fandom but i gotta vent a bit: i get that some of elton's pranks back in the day were a bit intense. and if you want to harp on the ones that got snc hurt or really emotional, also valid. but some of these fans are being upset for snc when snc don't fucking care about these pranks and SIGNED OFF on them existing and being posted in the first place !! you are talking about the same boys that did the killing best friend prank. clearly, snc can handle a douchebag who possibly destroys their car or slams a hand into their face or whatever. again, i agree that elton went above and beyond with his pranks, but like…. dear lord, please dislike him for the actual bad shit he's done.

he made a rape joke in 2020 and then tried to argue with fans about the semantics of it since he didn't "actually" make a joke about sexual assault. then he bitched about have to remove the video since the clip was at the tail end of it and only lasted like 10 second or whatever. he can't take a lick of criticism and will block fans that don't kiss his ass just bc they have something to say that isn't positive. for YEARS NOW, he has been petty and shit talking snc's name just bc of a video series they haven't done since the early half of 2021 that he believed they copied off of him BUT HE WASN'T CORRECT ABOUT THAT. tfil and 25x25 were not copies of one another. similar? sure, kinda. but not copies. and the single time snc went to the same place as elton THEY GAVE CREDIT IN THEIR VIDEO. but since then, elton has made it his mission to shit on snc any chance he gets and literally has bad mouthed them to crowds of his fans during tour (and most likely to the owners of some of these haunted places since snc weirdly can't go to some of these places for one reason or another but elton and other creators can). elton was BANNED from the conjuring house, and that alone tells me all i need to know about him. when demons can vibe in a space, but not you…. that's proof that you suck deeply as a human being. the only reason he was allowed back recently was bc of it having new owners.

everyone is harping on the old fucking pranks and dumb made up shit and not focusing on ACTUAL shit elton has done. it's like when the anons i had a couple years ago where focusing on shea lying about her age…. who CARES? there are bigger things to pay attention to !

sorry, none of this was directed at you, anon. i've just been really annoyed about tiktok and the dumb shit the fans on there say and it's getting on my last nerve that ppl are focusing on shit that does exist or lying about elton when there is plenty of proof of him being a dick irl. no need to lie on his behalf.

i just realized i never got to the rest of your ask. my bad lol

personally i can't sit thru elton's content bc i deeply don't like him. but if other ppl like him and his content, that's fine ! watch whoever you enjoy more of. my whole thing is elton is the reason i know who snc are, and i don't want to hate him. i would much rather live in the world where they're all still friends with one another and collab when they can. instead we live in the world where elton did all of that and then on top of it didn't even wish colby well when he was going thru his cancer treatment... so fuck him :)

and that's kinda cool that he was there after you. he was definitely copying you, you trend setter haha

[chloecherrysip]

WE ARE SO CLOSE TO THE MARIO MOVIE so here's one last wishlist/theory-fest from me! I already wrote a more robust one of these that was Mario and Luigi-specific that you can find on my blog. This one is still fairly specific to them but does feature a couple of other things. :)

(Just to be clear, these are all just theories! If I touch on something that really happens, it is pure luck, I swear.)

Someone else recently said this but just gotta reiterate because it is incredibly important: SOME KIND OF REPRESENTATION OF MARIO AND LUIGI AS KIDS, PLEASE. A full-fledged flashback would be INCREDIBLE but even just a meaningful photo would be truly delightful. I would also love to see where they live even briefly! I want character details, items strewn about, family photos, just a sense of really strong, lived-in comfort between them, etc very badly, even if it's just a few blink-and-you'll-miss-it shots.

(Also, this is specific but: if there IS a flashback at some point and it is ~*~thematically relevant~*~ AKA Mario taking care of Luigi in some way or Mario being told by a parent to "look after your brother" or something similar, i WILL cry right then and there)

Quality Luigi & Peach interaction, even just a tiny bit! I'm sure there will be some passing moments of this at the very end, but I've also been thinking a lot about the possibility of them meeting up in the airship before Mario finds them??? I do think the writing is on the wall that Peach will be taken prisoner in the third act (although I would honestly REALLY respect it if the movie just never goes there at all with her). Maybe she frees herself or is saved by Luigi & company and joins their jailbreak in progress. It's cute to think of some of Mario rubbing off on Peach during their trip and her being instinctively protective of Luigi right away. He tries to step in front of her when danger strikes at first because he is a gentleman but it quickly becomes crystal-clear that she's got combat training and he has exactly none. She is very nice but also insistent that he should stay behind her instead, haha. (and then Bowser recaptures both of them just as Mario shows up I'M SORRY I WANT THE ANGST)

(Also, I don't think this is likely to happen at all but just a potentially angsty thought: if Mario IS missing in action around this time like many people suspect after Rainbow Road (considering Peach and Toad seem to drive back alone in the commercials) and Peach assumes the worst, it's sweet and sad to think of her encountering Luigi in the airship and taking full responsibility for him right then and there because she promised Mario they would save his brother and she intends to fulfill that promise no matter what, even if he's gone)

Another kinda specific thing but I could see it happening and if it does, my soul might leave my body for a second: there being a moment in the final confrontation with Bowser where Mario seems completely down for the count, but then he hears Luigi call his name or cry out in general and that's the spark that gets him back up!!!

In general, I really hope there gets to be a TINY, TINY BIT of time at the end of the movie where Luigi is shown happy and having fun after his ordeal, please. He deserves it!!! Even if it's just some art/snapshots over the end credits or something. I want him and Mario to get to go to some of the places we throughout the movie together and actually enjoy them (maybe they have a picnic with Peach and Toad in the fire flower fields, maybe they race karts for fun with the Kongs, etc) or even if they're shown exploring Toad Town, that would be enough (And for the record, even if they don't show this, I'm going to believe it happens IN MY HEART)

Also it would be funny to see Luigi trying out Peach's training course and/or experimenting with powerups if he never gets to use one in the course of the movie and struggling (but Mario cheers him on and is there for support!) (or maybe he's even GREAT at the training course - in a chaotic way - because guess what, he lived it already!!!)

I'm not holding out much hope for this at all, but man...I just really want Daisy to exist in this universe. Even just MENTION her. Even just have her in a crowd or party scene at the end for the briefest second! I am begging u for the slightest little scrap, movie.

[mistresseast]

can you explain in more detail why you think the PT weren't good friends for akiren? i'm not asking out of hate or to start drama, i just never interpreted things that way and i'm genuinely curious. i don't think them being brainwashed by maruki makes them "bad friends", but i don't know if that's what you meant either. i'd love to read a proper explanation on this that isn't just people arguing in the notes of that post.

Hi! Yeah, I know the ~discourse~ climate is pretty touchy and not a good place to exchange ideas, so I’ll do my best to put my thoughts on this matter into words. 

Settle in, bc this one is long.

I’ll start off by saying I don’t dislike the PT, nor do I think they’re bad people, and honestly I think they love Joker a lot! Ryuji calling Akira after his fake death and talking about how his ideas on what makes a hero have changed because of Akira genuinely makes me emotional, along with dozens of other scenes with the thieves! They’re good kids who could be really good friends to Akira but that’s not what’s shown in the game. I don’t think it’s controversial to say Akira’s relationships with all of his friends are transactional. That’s kind of the point, all of his confidants arise out of deals, give and take, and in the metanarrative of the game, that’s how it works. You as the player help these characters solve their problems, and through ranking their confidants up, you get access to more gameplay perks. So it’s pretty even!! But like,,Akira, the character, isn’t the player. There’s no in-story mechanic by which he can cash in friendship points for being-good-at-killing-things prizes. Yes, he uses those abilities to not die in the metaverse, but there is no literal, in-universe way to explain how hanging out with someone translates to [insert gameplay perk here]. So you have to look at what is physically happening in the story. Akira hangs out with the PT, stands there while they have drama with another irrelevant character, and then one way or another their problems get solved and they swear to be Akira’s blood brother or whatever. Akira is a crutch for these characters, and they say multiple times that they wouldn’t have been able to do what they did without him. So all of their shit gets handled and Akira gets?? Like actually gets?? What? Inquiries about his well-being? Offers to help him? Questions about his life, his interests? No,,,not really,, But he gets access to a super powerful persona!! Yay!!! Bc everyone knows he’s just a little shadow-killing machine, right? And even the relationships he does get something tangible (as in separate from the mechanics of the game) out of, like Kawakami’s, are built on the notion that if Akira stops providing for whatever reason, the relationship will end. So essentially, Akira is under the pressure of filling whatever role his friends need him in for however long at any time, and he’s been led to believe that if he stops or fails, he will stop receiving any reciprocal care and acceptance.

(And I know this is all gameplay stuff, I know it has to be like this to codify the complicated process of human relationships, I know all of that, I’m just trying to find a deeper layer bc that’s what I do.)

This whole thing comes into pretty clear focus for me during the third semester when you visit everyone in the false reality. Everyone is happy to see him, of course, but they’re clearly wrapped up in their own happiness. Which is understandable, again, I’m not saying the PT need to be attached to Akira to be good friends, but it all still feels off to me.

If they know Joker, then they’d know it’s weird that he just shows up and starts asking these pointed questions while they’re in the middle of something. All of their other interactions with him have been led by them. Yeah, Joker approaches them bc the player has decided to hang out with them, but the other character always chooses the activity and leads the discussion. Akira showing up out of nowhere and asking them to “remember” and “move on” and whatnot should be raising some major red flags. And it clearly does, since their memories do start to return, but they’re all too scared of losing their happiness that they nope out of the conversation as soon as possible, without stopping to consider why Joker might be trying to reach out to them like that. They’re his friends; they should know he wouldn’t just be trying to hurt them or make them unhappy. After all, their entire relationship with him up til that point has been exclusively about Joker trying to help them. This doesn’t make the PT bad people, running away is a totally natural reaction in that situation. They’re just kids, and their minds have been manipulated to a point, but it’s not like they don’t remember Joker or the way they’ve grown since meeting him. In fact many of them mention how much they’ve matured recently, but they never actually relate that back to Akira, despite him being the primary driving force behind most of their personal arcs, even though they definitely remember him. Translation vagueness or deliberate nod to the idea that the PT don’t actually credit Akira with all the hard work he did after their initial lip service? Hmmm. Anyway, their failure to recognize that Joker is struggling just demonstrates to me what was set up all throughout their confidant links, that their relationships are transactional and that they don’t necessarily consider Joker and his individual needs outside of what he provides for them. And when they no longer need him bc that hole has been filled, he simply doesn’t occupy the same place of importance in their lives. 

Makoto’s flashback in particular stood out to me, bc it was from a moment where she was specifically talking about feeling like she finally found a place to belong with the Phantom Thieves (and by extension, with Joker), but then she desperately tries to brush it off. Obviously that sense of belonging wasn’t meaningful enough to her for her to want it back. And I’m not blaming her, of course, any teenager would choose to have their father back over being in a vigilante group lmao, I just thought it was telling that the devs decided to show us a scene that was originally meant to be heartwarming as an example of the harsh reality Makoto wants to forget. All of the flashbacks are from defining moments for the thieves, but that one specifically got me like *thinking emoji*

So his friends are hesitant, despite the fact that they must know something is wrong. It’s understandable, they all stand to lose a lot if someone messes with the status quo. I genuinely don’t think I would react any differently. But there is someone who reacts differently and against his own self-interest. It’s Goro, the one who has arguably the most to lose, who doesn’t turn away from Akira. He seeks Akira out and teams up with him to uncover what’s really going on, even though he has every reason to believe that prodding too deep will literally mean the end of his life. He forces Akira and himself to face the truth because he knows anything else would just be an insult to what they’ve suffered so far. He’s the only one who never flinches, and that, more than any of his friends’ come-to-jesusing (which Akira still has to initiate) is what Akira needs in that situation. For the first time (outside of the brief instances in the tutorial levels), we see a situation where Akira is actually the dependent one, the one who needs help, who needs support. And the only one who has ever provided that, unconditionally, without demanding anything in return, is Goro. I could go into how Goro’s confidant blows all of the others out of the water in terms of building both himself AND Akira as characters, but it’s been said already and by smarter people than me. But basically, despite competition being a core theme of their relationship, Goro is the only character who is portrayed as Akira’s equal. Their contests are all in the name of improving not just Goro, but Akira too. Goro is the only character who expresses an interest in Akira’s inner life and development, and as such he knows Akira better than anyone else. So when Maruki tries to trap them all in a gilded birdcage, Goro won’t stand for it and he knows Akira won’t stand for it either. That’s why he’s so betrayed if you choose to accept the dreamworld. You’re negating the basis of your entire relationship with him and going against your own principles. Out of every character in the game, the one who knows Akira best and refuses to abandon him even when that could mean his own death is Goro Akechi.

I want to reiterate: I do not hate or even dislike the PT!! And tbh I don’t really think they “abandoned” Akira. That post, imo, is supposed to be kind of hyperbolic. Unless it’s referring to how many of them literally sprint away when he comes to talk to them lol. I look at it more like a commentary on how thoughtlessly the PT act as soon as their wishes are granted. I know it’s set up linearly for story purposes, but isn’t it kind of sad how no one checks up on Akira in the week he’s going around talking to people? Especially after he’s been acting so comparatively weird? It’s not unusual that they might be caught up in other stuff, but while you’re going around and visiting everyone, you don’t get a single text or call from ANY of the thieves, for a whole week!! Goro even comments on it directly with his pointed little “I’m sure you’re just as close as you were before” comment. God, he’s such a bitch. Ultimately, the PT do get their acts together, and it’s partially out of the realization that Akira is struggling alone against something and needs their help, which I love and appreciate. I think they are good friends who want to support Akira, but they can’t understand him past the role they’ve placed him in, and until they do, they’ll never be able to be what he needs. Akira loves his friends and knows he can rely on them in most ways, but those relationships will always be dogged by the pervasive fear that he must constantly earn the right to have the relationship at all. What he needs MOST is someone he doesn’t have to perform for, and from what we see in the game, none of the thieves fit that bill. Except Goro. 

I know this was long and rambly and probably pretty disjointed but I wanted to be as thorough as possible and all of my thoughts just sort of gushed out. Obviously ymmv about all of this depending on how you interpret the game, but this is what I arrived at thanks to my analysis so this is what I have for you! Thank you for coming to my Ted Talk

[xxisxxisxxis]

AU: Gateway Drug | "Forty-Something" [PT. 1]

[Pt. 2 HERE]

**This was not my idea, the credit goes fully to an anon that suggested it!!

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1988

"Shh!" I try not to laugh at Izzy as he nearly trips coming around the corner, bracing himself against the wall as I'm tucked under his arm to help him keep his balance. 

"When the hell did this get here?" He asks in reference to the wall, fumbling for his key when we get to his room. 

"You gotta slow down some, Izzy." I tell him softly as he struggles to get the door open but he eventually does. 

"I know, I know, I hear Axl bitch at me about it constantly, trust me I know." He rolls his eyes, careful not to drop his cigarette as he reaches for a lighter. 

He can't steady his thumb enough to light it, though, and I sigh and snatch the lighter from him, lighting the cigarette before he can complain. 

"Thanks." He falls back on the bed, chuckling a little as I stand at the foot of the bed, my arms crossed. "Don't take this the wrong way but you look hot even when you're knocked up." 

"And you're high." I roll my eyes. "And drunk." I add. "And I'm leaving you to it because I'm tired." 

I go to leave but he sits up. 

"You can crash here." He offers and I raise my brows. 

"Izzy, if this is a part of some grand scheme to be the next in line to have sex with me--"

"--You're pregnant. I don't fuck pregnant chicks." He wrinkles his nose, laying back down. 

"Gee, thanks." I mumble, crawling onto the bed and laying on my back beside him. 

In a moment of quiet I glance over at him smiling smugly. 

"What?" He questions, taking notice. 

"You love me so much you don't even know how to handle it." I tell him. 

"Like hell I do." He denies it in a sharp scoff. 

"You don't want me to leave you."

"That doesn't mean anything." 

"We're friends." I say next. 

"No, we're not." 

"You love me." 

"Whatever helps you sleep at night." 

I keep my smile for a few more moments, before I close my eyes. 

I feel him scoot the tiniest bit closer to me before settling down, too.

"Psst," he says in a few minutes and I open an eye and look at him. 

"What is it?" 

"You wanna get married?" 

I furrow my brows and turn to face him fully. 

"How the hell do you go from denying we're even friends to wanting to marry me?" 

"I'm high and drunk, like you said." He admits and I sigh, shaking my head a little as he clears his throat. "You and Nikki are getting divorced, you and Duff aren't together, either...everybody I know is getting hitched. I'm left out." He shrugs. 

"Be thanking God." I tell him and he chuckles. 

"Oh, c'mon. It wouldn't be that bad." He argues. "It would work out because Duff's in the band so he'd get to see the baby all the time so you wouldn't have to worry much with working in visiting and stuff. My mom would fucking love you, your dad already likes me...we've already seen each other naked so we know what to expect." He adds.

I hit his arm and glare at him. 

"Well, we're together a lot so we know each other's habits and stuff...I think it could work." 

"You're high. And drunk." I reiterate, getting back on my back. "And full of shit." 

"Okay, what about that old pact that desperate lonely people make? Like, 'if we're forty something and neither of us are married, we'll get married to each other'?" 

Knowing that by the time we're in our forties we most definitely won't be single, I humor him. 

"Izzy, if we even make it to forty-something, and you're sober and have your shit together, I'll marry you." I agree. 

"Deal," he holds his hand out for me to shake, and I do.

"Now go to sleep." I urge, turning over to face away from him. 

"The cold sex shoulder is already starting to settle in and we aren't even together yet." He aggravates and I reach my hand back and swat at him, making him laugh. 

1989

"Izzy, stop touching it!" I bark, hitting at his hand.

"Viv, I'm good, that fucking pixie stick didn't do shit." He bites back, his fingers on his nose as I'm holding ice to it. 

"Jeffrey Dean Isbell." I snap. 

"Vivian Estine Kinston." He says right back. 

"Fine!" I shove at his nose and he winces. 

"Jesus fuck, Vivian, I said it doesnt hurt to touch it, not fucking reset the bone, damnit!" He gripes in pain. 

"Oh, no, that fucking pixie stick didn't do shit." I remind him. "And you deserved it, by the way." 

"Here we go," he grumbles, leaning his head back in the car. 

"No, I mean seriously, Izzy. Drunk or not you can't go one night without being a complete asshole to a woman? Especially if they're your friends' wife, you're supposed to have extra respect for them, jesus." 

"I'm not friends with that little squealy bitch." He declares. 

"You still respect his wife. You don't pull her dress up and then hit her when she raises hell at you for doing it." 

"I didn't hit her, I karate chopped her. There's a fucking difference." He informs. 

"Either way, you're a moron." 

"And you're a bitch." 

"I don't take anything seriously from someone who snorts so much coke he only has one nostril because the size of the hole burnt into his septum." I hiss. 

"That's perfectly fine because I never took anything you've said seriously just because." He doesn't miss a beat before he drops the ice for a moment to light a cigarette.

"You're such a jackass."

"Are we saying vows right now?" He asks in reference to our insults. 

"I said when you're sober and forty-something, although right now I don't see you making it to forty-something."

"We should probably go ahead and consummate it, then." 

"Oh, gee, how tempting, I don't know how I'd possibly ever resist such an idea." I sarcastically let out and roll my eyes. 

"Vegas is only a few hours away," he points out. 

"The loss of blood from your nasal cavity is definitely getting to you." I scoff. 

"Viv, what could possibly be so bad about marrying me?" He blows smoke put of his mouth. 

"Well, for one, when you want a girl to marry you, you don't ask her while you're strung out or on a coke binge or drunk. You don't ask her while blowing cigarette smoke in her face, and you certainly don't ask her after getting your face beat in for sexually harassing and physically assaulting your acquaintance's wife." 

"I was fucked up, and that doesn't make it alright or whatever but I really do feel like shit about it, you know."

"Then you need to call Vince as soon as you can and explain that to him and apologize to him and Sharise. Because it really embarrassed her and hurt her feelings." I tell him. 

"Then will you marry me?" 

"I'm not talking about this anymore, Izzy, drop it." 

"Fine." He doesn't argue...but I do see him glance at me from the corner of my eye, a smirk on his lips. 

1990

"Tommy, I can't just up and fly out to Toronto tomorrow because me and Duff are going up to visit his family for a few days with Monroe." I explain, putting mascara on. 

"Well, think about it alright?" 

"Tommy, I'm not thinking about it, there's no way for me to go to Seattle and Toronto at the same time." 

"Well--"

"--I'll see you guys in a couple weeks, anyway, so what's the deal?" 

"The 'deal' is that you act like you don't want anything to do with us now that you and Nikki aren't togther anymore." He accuses. 

"That's not true." 

"Anytime you come out to a show is if Sharise or Heather are out on the road, too, and you just hangout with them the whole time and avoid us." 

"Gee, Tommy, could that possibly be because you idiots wore me down so much over the course of six years that I just don't have the energy to even be around you too much even when you're sober?" 

There's silence on the other line. 

"Not trying to be an ass, Tommy, but it's the truth. I love you, but I can't make it to Toronto. I'm sorry." 

More silence. 

I just sigh and hang up, finishing my makeup before I hear a horn honking out front.

"Monroe," I peek my head into his nursery, seeing his butt up in the air, thumb in mouth, tiny snores coming from him. 

I gently shake him awake, picking him up when all else fails, heading to the car. 

As soon as I get out there, I hand Monroe to Izzy, who's behind the wheel, as I get Monroe's carseat in his car. 

Once the toddler is locked in, I get in the passenger side and let out a breath. 

"You alright?" He asks me. 

"Yeah, just...a lot...I told Tommy I didn't want to go see them because I don't have the energy to be around them now that they're sober due to how they acted for so long when Nikki and I were together." 

"So...you don't want to be around them, but you'll come be around all of us." He points out. 

"I'd rather be in a room full of messed up Guns N' Roses than sober Mötley Crüe." 

"Ouch." He mumbles. 

"So, where we going?" I ask him. 

"The courthouse." He explains. 

"For what?" 

"To get married." He answers casually. 

"Ha, ha, funny...seriously where are we going?" 

"To the courthouse to get married." He says, again. 

"Izzy. That's not funny." I state. 

"I'm glad it isn't because I'm being serious, Viv." 

"Izzy, no you're not." 

"Yeah, I am."

"Stop the car." I order and he sighs, slowing down. 

"Damnit, Viv." He says as I open the door and get out, feeling too trapped in the car. "Now, you know I've been asking you for the past two years, Viv, I'm tired of hearing, 'no'. You think I'm kidding when I ask you but I'm being serious." 

"You can't be serious, Izzy, because it literally came out of nowhere the first time you even suggested it! 'Everybody else is doing it and I'm left out' is a shitty reason to want to marry someone--and you're not even four months sober! The last time a high idiot told me he wanted to marry me, I said, 'yes,' and I was in hell for it for years! So, yes, Izzy, I apologize if I wasn't taking you seriously all the times you've asked me about it because the idea in itself is just so freaking ridiculously stupid, I thought surely you'd have more sense than to think we could!" 

"Fine!"

"Fine!"

"Good!"

"Good! We aren't even friends anyway so screw you!" He throws at me. 

"wE aReN't EvEn FrIeNdS aNyWaY sO sCrEw YoU." I mimic his voice, walking around to get Monroe, who's still sleeping, out of the back. 

"Viv, get back in the car." 

"No."

"Vivian, get back in the damn car." 

"No!" 

"Why do you have to be so fucking stubborn?!" 

"The same reason you have to be so full of shit!" 

1991

"Monroe don't run!" I chase after the three year old backstage, grabbing his sides before he can get away from me. 

"Where's daddy?" He asks me with a chuckle, fingers in his mouth, his eyes switching over people passing by. 

"I don't know, baby, but we can go find him." I suggest. 

"Yeah!" He excitedly exclaims. 

"Yeah!" I reply, laughing…

"I said 'this' much cranberry and 'this' much Vodka, man!" I hear Duff complain, followed by the splattering of liquid hitting the floor. 

I turn the corner to see Duff face to face with their manager.

"Daddy, daddy, daddy!" Monroe kicks his legs, wrestling to get down. 

"Monroe—"

Duff looks at us, this look coming to his face. 

"H-Hey, man." He walks over to us, smiling at me. "When'd you get here?" He asks me, going to kiss my check but I lean back, wincing. 

"You smell like b-o-o-z-e, Duff." I scold him as he takes our son from me. 

"Yeah, don't worry about it." He assures me easy-goingly as Monroe hugs him tightly, grinning and laughing. 

His girlfriend...more so drug buddy, Linda, walks by and he glances at her. 

"Babe, you coming?" She asks him, raising her brows. 

He looks at Monroe, then me, then her again, before frowning slightly. 

"Go, we'll be okay for a few minutes." I insist. 

"Are you sure?" He questions.

"Duff, we just got here. You don't have to spend every second with us right away. You've got stuff to do." 

He sighs, looking at me, then Monroe again. 

"C'mon, baby, daddy's gotta get back to work." I tell Monroe and he reaches for me again. 

I take him and Duff kisses his head, and mine. 

"See ya before the show." He tells us, waving bye to Monroe. "See ya in just a few minutes, Roe." He assures him as Monroe waves back. 

I sigh, Monroe looking around again. 

"When's daddy coming back?" He asks me. 

"In just a few minutes." I assure him.

He's soon looking over my shoulder, his eyes wide and bright, a wide smile on his face as he brings his finger to his lips and goes "shh." 

Before I can turn to see who he's looking at, a sharp pinch on my ass has me snapping around, ready to throw a punch, only to be met with Izzy. 

He and Monroe laugh together at my expense and I hit Izzy in the arm. 

"Tailhole." I hiss out, watching my language and he chuckles some more. 

He looks so much healthier than he used to. 

He used to be scraggly and high looking all the time...now he's filled out a little more and his skins glowing. 

Of course that also probably has to do with him finding a girl he's full blown in love with.

"Duff leave you out here?" He asks and I shrug. 

"We just got here, he's with Linda." 

Izzy wrinkles his nose the slightest. 

"Duff's to Linda like Nikki was to Vanity." He mumbles. 

"Don't I know it." I state, knowing a crackhead girlfriend/boyfriend when I see one now that I've had experience with Nikki and Vanity, and Tansy and Sparkie. "Where is she at?" I ask once we get to his dressing room and see a picture of the Aneka girl he'd been telling me about in bits and pieces the past couple months. 

"Visiting her family." He tells me as there's a small knock at the door. 

"Yeah?!" Izzy calls and the door opens. 

"There he is!" Tansy says excitedly, Monroe laughing and showing a mouthful of teeth, getting down from me and running to her. 

"Tans!" He replies to her, just as happy to see her. 

"Oh, my goodness, you have gotten so tall since I last saw you." She tells him and he puts his bicep up and she grins, squeezing him to her. "You wanna go see uncle Axl?" 

"Yes!" 

"Is that okay? Just for a little bit." Tansy asks me and I nod.

"Yeah, that's fine." I say and she picks him up. 

"Alright, c'mon." She giggles and he waves at me. 

"See you in just a little bit." I tell him, waving. 

When she shuts the door, I fall back on the couch and groan, making Izzy raise his brows. "When we first got here, all I could hear was, 'daddy, daddy, daddy!'" I refer to Monroe and Izzy takes the cheap shot. 

"Sounds like you on a good night." He says before I can finish and I glare at him, making him laugh. 

"Sorry." He shrugs. 

"Anyway...we finally get here and all he sees is his dad throw a fit because he didn't have the perfectly formulated ratio of Vodka and cranberry juice." I state and he lets out a soft breath. "And then Nikki's drinking again, and I know he's drinking again because he calls me in the middle of the night, drunk, to complain about his wife--which I told him not to marry her because he barely had time to really get to know her but nope. Nobody ever listens to Viv. And Tansy said that tweedle-Duff and tweedle-Slash wake up and start their morning with alcohol, which is comforting...I've been talking to Steven's mom a lot and she said he's been going down hill again after he tried to sober up some…"

"Yeah, I heard." He rubs the back of his neck. 

"Axl's keeping Tansy from seeing anybody, he won't even let her call to check up on Steven right now. He thinks it'll trigger her to go off the deep end and get back on smack." I add. "Everything is just a shitshow at this point." 

"Yeah…" he mumbles, before a long pause sits between us, and he finally clears his throat and sighs. "Um, I need to tell you something that I haven't told any of the guys yet, and I don't know how you'll feel but just know I've thought about it a lot and think I should do it." 

"Izzy, I don't care if you're gay." I tell him and he sighs, giving a little smile…

"This is pretty serious." He says and I furrow my brows a little. "I want outta the band, Viv." 

I feel a punch in my stomach. 

First Steven, now Izzy...this is not how this was supposed to go…

"W-What?" 

"Izzy, c'mon!" Their manager calls. "You're on soon!" 

"We'll talk about it later, alright?" He says and I'm at a loss for words.

"Izzy," 

"It'll be alright, we'll talk about it." He assures me before stepping out.

Later that night, after Axl finally got on stage and the show was barely completed, Izzy and I split a room, Monroe and I taking a bed while Izzy takes the other. 

Once Monroe is tucked into bed after passing out on the way to the hotel, I sit and wait for Izzy to get out of the shower and end up dozing next to Monroe.

I slowly blink awake when I feel fingertips tapping at my forehead, and Izzy's crouched down by the bed beside me...a little smile on his lips. 

"Hey," he chuckles. 

"Hey." I say back, blinking once more…

"It's not about the music anymore, Viv. The egos and drugs and booze and pussy--it's all coming first. I'm tired of having a show at 8:00pm and not getting onstage 'til 11:45pm, and only staying on stage until 12:30am before Axl gets breathed on the wrong way and storms off." He says softly not to wake Monroe up. "And it didn't help when my royalties were in talks of getting cut...and then when Ax is constantly coming up with lawsuits or contracts or NDA's, it's bullshit. It started out as five of us against them. Now Steven's gone, Axl's God and Slash, Matt and Duff are killing themselves. I just want out." 

"You're breaking my heart, Izzy, you know that?"  I sniffle tiredly, trying not to cry. 

"I promise I'll be okay. This isn't gonna spring me into a relapse or anything." He assures me.

"I'm sorry for all of this happening." I admit and he shakes his head. 

"Nah...it doesn't have anything to do with you. Me and the guys just have our own things going and it's just time for me to go my own way." 

I just sniffle again, wiping a stray tear, and nod. 

"And we'll still stay in touch and stuff." He adds. "You'll still see me around."

"Promise?" I ask. 

"How else are we gonna keep tabs on each other to see if we gotta go through with our plan at forty-something." He shrugs. 

"Oh, please, you'll still be with Aneka and won't even be bothered with me." I tell him and he shakes his head a little. 

"Viv, I harassed you for nearly three years to marry me--even thought I didn't even fucking like the idea of marriage. If I went through that much trouble, I'm not gonna up and leave and only talk to you every blue moon." 

I smile a little, rubbing my lips together before saying, "does this mean you're finally acknowledging that we are, indeed, friends?"

He rolls his eyes and stands back up. 

"I didn't say that." He tells me and I chuckle. "G'night, Viv." 

"Goodnight." 

[mo-mo-and-porkchop]

Umbrella academy fiction

Chapter 1

Canon and OC; Deigo x OC, Klaus x OC platonic

*as always I do not own any part of the canon characters or show. I am merely writing my own adaptation to the storyline. Nor do I own any gifs/gif credit.

**I do own all things related to the OCs and additional story elements. And apologies, I couldn't find any "young" gifs of them, but they are all meant to be young adults to show age in this fic.

Tagging: @imcrowley , @wicked-bitch-of-the-west

On a typical sunny day in 1989 a girl was born under extraordinary circumstances - her mother beginning the day not pregnant and ending it with a newborn girl. Reginald Hargreaves was unable to purchase their gift from God, but as fate would have she would still become linked to the obsessive billionaire through Klaus, his disappointing Number Four.

One fateful night in her bar thrust the two into each other's life and they soon became close friends, their tragic pasts a common denominator. Emily tried to aid her friend and his family in thwarting the apocalypse, but her life ultimately lost when the shit inevitably hit the fan.

This is not that story.

Our story takes place five years after the Hargreaves family jumped back in time after unsuccessfully saving the world; bringing with them all the knowledge gained from their first chance at life.

-----

"I'm telling you Diego. We can do this," Klaus said pleadingly to his brother. "She said if she had only gotten out a few years earlier, she would have had a better chance at life. We can give her that chance."

Diego stopped just outside his room. He eyed Klaus as he begged for him to agree.

"Please Diego. She is...was my friend," he corrected himself. This time travel thing was hard to get used to. "I owe it to her to at least try."

It was true that Emily had been as good a friend as someone could to Klaus back then. He'd beena raging drug addict who brought nothing but chaos. There weren't many people who could handle something like that. She'd been one of the few; even managing to get him into rehab a few times.

Not that it had mattered. Klaus had a standing bed there back then and the staff a running pool on how short his next break would last.

But it had been obvious she at least cared for him. And that was more than Diego could say for himself. Klaus was his brother and he had given two shits at the time if he lived or died.

"Fine," he finally agreed.

"Yes!" Klaus said quietly, but triumphantly.

With his second time around, he wanted to get it right. Make amends for his previous infractions.

Starting with this.

"But we do this my way. You got it," he said definitively, getting close enough to stop Klaus' little victory dance. He wanted to make sure his brother understood just how serious he was.

"Got it," Klaus said with a mock salute. "If I remember correctly, right around now would be the 'Halloween lockdowns' as Em liked to call it," Klaus said with a small smirk Diego's way.

His brother looked at him confused "Lockdowns? Where is she? A prison?"

Oh, that's right. He doesn't know.

It had taken Klaus awhile to pull what nuggets she had revealed of her past. He knew, without a doubt, Diego hadn't gotten shit out of her. The few times they'd met his brother was partial to being an asshole to anyone who even remotely took Klaus' side and she had been no different.

"She's at a religious boarding school," Klaus explained quickly. "A real scared straight kinda one. From what she told me though, the night before Halloween the nuns do one final sweep of the grounds, leaving the front door unlocked."

"Pfft. Morons," Diego huffed, the fact that he was speaking of godly women lost to him completely. "So it's a dash and grab. Easy."

"Yeeaa...about that," Klaus began tentatively. Diego had only just agreed to spring Emily from Hell.

"What?" Diego asked lowly. He knew he shouldn't have gotten his hope up so easily. Nothing was ever so cut and dry with Klaus.

"She's also, sort of, kinda in her own lockdown. We may need Five to help us too," he added reluctantly. "Which is fine," he quickly continued, keeping Diego from immediately changing his mind. "Ever since we got back Five has really been a team player. I'm sure if our little heist idea came from you he'd be on board. A hundred percent."

Diego couldn't take this shit with Klaus a second go 'round. He wanted to break Emily out of school? Fine. He needed Diego's help? Also, peachy fuckinf keen. But if he insisted on keeping secrets along the way then Diego would walk his happy ass on out the door and Klaus could go fuck himself.

He grabbed hold of his brother, who flinched more from shock than fear, and drug him into his room, away from listening ears. He tossed his brother onto his bed as gently as he could. Klaus watched as he pulled his desk chair over, sitting on it backward and leaning against it.

"Before I ask Five anything you are gonna spill your guts and give me all the Intel you have on Emily. Otherwise, I'm out and you're on your own."

Klaus groaned with Diego's ultimatum. "Fine," he grumbled. "I'll tell you everything. But you have to swear you'll get Five to help no matter what," he countered holding up his pinky.

"What are you, six?"

"Nothing is more binding than a pinky swear," Klaus said, wiggling his fingers enticingly.

"You never quit do you?"

"Nope," Klaus said with a satisfied grin.

"Jesus Christ." Diego sighed with a roll of his eyes, but nevertheless he linked pinkies with his brother.

"No matter what," Klaus reiterated.

"No matter what," Diego reluctantly agreed before immediately letting go of him.

"Good," Klaus said clapping his hands together and rubbing them conspiratorially. "Now. What do I know about Emily?" he asked himself, feigning an attempt to really dig deep into his thoughts. "Em, Em, Em."

"I'm losing my patience Klaus."

"Alright, fine," Klaus said with an exasperated sigh. Nothing much had changed with Diego this time around - he was still far too serious for his own good. "I know she was one of the few dad couldn't buy, obviously. I deduced that one myself," he admitted proudly.

Diego rolled his eyes and sighed. Even without drugs Klaus' mind still ran a million miles a minute. "Focus," he said keeping his brother on track.

"Right," he replied forcing himself back to their present storytelling session. "She was unbuyable. Her parents were religious and pure," he said mockingly, throwing up the the scouting sign of three fingers. "When Em didn't fit it to their perfect life, they shipped her off and forgot about her. To St. Christopher's School for the Misguided to be exact."

"You mean that old school convent on the outskirts of the city?"

"That's the one," Klaus said in agreement. "She's been there..." he checked his wrist as if a watch sat upon it. "Twelve years now," he added looking back to Diego.

"Twelve years?! What the Hell Klaus?? I thought she was just sent there."

"Yea. When she was six," Klaus said with a snort. "That was after all the exercisims failed," he added nonchalantly.

"Exorcisms!?" Diego was beginning to regret his decision to help. "Look. I don't know what kind of "school" you're taking me to, but how do we know Emily even wants to break out?" he asked in a half-hearted attempt to back out.

"Because she makes it out on her own after another three years anyway. But she always said if she'd got out just a few years earlier she'd have gone farther in life. Between you and me, I thought she turned out just fine the way she was," he added leaning in conspiratorially.

"I don't know about that. She was friends with you."

"Hey! Unfair!" Klaus said feigning offense. "Trust me," he continued, shrugging off the insult. "Once Five is on board, everything will be fine," he said reassuringly, but with little affect. "Then it really will be a dash and grab. Five will just do his little time warp thingie and..." He sucked air through his teeth and gestured for in-and-out. "We'll have Em out and free as a bird in no time," he added with a sigh and a smile.

Diego stared at him, only reacting when his wide grin faded. His mind had already been made up, but it was sti fun to see him sweat. He promptly grabbed him up and pulled toward the hallway - and all the way to Five's room.

------

"Klaus has something he wants to ask you," he said pushing past their brother when he answered the door.

"And what might that be?" he asked, confusion evident on his face as he shut the door behind them.

Once through the threshold doego released his grip on Klaus and took solace off in the corner, waiting to see how well he did with Five. Their brother would be a much tougher sell. He'd never even met Emily.

"Well," Klaus began with a nervous laugh, glancing back to Diego hoping to get some backup. His brother simply urged him on. Klaus sighed and his entire being deflated with his refusal.

"Klaus, what the hell is going on? I don't have time for another one of your ridiculous pranks," Five complained impatiently.

"I need your help rescuing a friend," he admitted freely, turning back to Five.

Five laughed freely at his request. "No," he said letting his facial expressions fall flat. "The last time I tried to help you I ended up having to warp out of police custody."

"But you did get out," Klaus cut in trying to avoid a retelling of their most recent mishap.

"And I had to be the one to explain it all to dad. Alone," he added with rising anger.

Klaus grimaced. "Yea. Sorry about that. I wish I could have been there, really, but something important came up. Real now-or-never type stuff."

"What? Like avoiding the inevitable end of the world? Because last I remember we've already fixed that problem and I can't think of anything more "now-or-never"," he threw back at him.

He knew Five was right. "I guess when you put it like that, I could have made it," he admitted almost sheepishly.

Five merely scowled at his admission.

"But this is different," he added quickly, pushing past Five when he went to kick them out of his room. Klaus shut the door and leaned on it for added security he would finish hearing him out.

"How so?"

Klaus' smile returned. His interest was piqued. "Because we...are gonna..."

Diego rolled his eyes. His sales pitch was quickly dying. "Because you're gonna have me," he stepping forward.

"Not that I don't doubt yoir abilities, but how does that any different? Other than your presence of course."

Their brother's smile widened. "Yes!" he exclaimed before Diego could answer, outstreching his arms toward him and crossing to be by his side. "Because Diego here is an extra set of eyes and ears," he added, cradling his shoulders and endearingly placing his hand on his chest.

Diego glared at Klaus. "Because I will make sure Klaus doesn't screw anything up this time," he answerd shaking himself free.

Five remained silent, considering Klaus 'mission'. He had become anxious lately to do more than just train and follow daddy's orders - even if it was what they all agreed to before their jump back. Not that he would ever admit that to Klaus, but he supposed it could be worth it of Diego was on board.

Klaus stated expectantly and his brother who eyed the two of them. "Say I help you. What is your grand plan to save...who exactly?"

Klaus smiled widely at Diego, ecstatic that things might actually go his way for once.

"Emily," Diego answered, ignoring Klaus.

"Emily?" Five asked surprised with a slight laugh. "You mean the bartender psychic?"

"Telepathic," Klaus corrected him. "But yes. Her. So will you help me? Please?"

Diego rolled his eyes at the duo. "Just say yes already. I can't take much more of this," he added exasperated, dropping down onto the chair at Five's desk.

"Alright fine," he finally agreed.

Klaus began to shower his brother with thabks. He sure hadn't been as appreciative of Diego's allegiance. He huffed to hide his offense. "Klaus!" He pointed at his wrist when he had his brother's attention.

"Oh right. So. Now that I have the best two brothers on board..."

"Klaus," Diego warned.

"Alright, alright. Stop getting your panties in a bunch."

Diego jumped up ready to strangle him.

"Hey! Calm down!" Five intervened. "Don't make me regret helping you," he scolded his brothers. "Now," he continued once the two had parted ways. "When and how are we supposed to save Emily? And from what?"

"I'm glad you asked," Klaus responded slyly before repeating the plan to Five

------

"There it is," Klaus whispered to his brothers, pointing out their entry point.

They crouched hidden among the bushes just outside the point of no return. A nun came out of the front door, followed by two others, and just as Klas said left the door open. Diego huffed quietly to himself and rolled his eyes. Klaus smiled widely.

"Okay," Five said shifting his jacket and bit and readying to jump. "Where is her room?" he asked staring at the building.

It was your typical, old-school convent turned boarding opp. The layout would be easy to figure out.

Klaus shut his eyes and mimicked going over a map with his fingers. "It should be, if memory serves me right, last one on the left, second floor," he said opening his eyes and looking toward the building too. "She always said one of the only good things she remembered about this place were the sunsets," he said quietly to himself with a sad sigh. "West side," he added.

And just like that Five was gone.

-----

He reappeared with a small pop in a girl's room. She was sound asleep, her back to where Five now stood. He crept to her bed and gently tried waking her.

"Emily," he whispered. "Emily wake up."

The girl began to stir, turning toward him. The sight of a boy by her bed had to be a dream. She rubbed her eyes and yawned, sitting up to wake up further. The realization that he was real hit her. Her eyes grew wide in terror and she screamed.

Five quickly covered her mouth. "Emily, please."

She quieted her screams realizing who he was and the fear in her eyes grew to confusion. She mumbled something into his hand.

"What?" he whispered, uncovering her mouth.

"I'm not Emily," she managed to stammer out quietly.

[lunamanar]

Ask for you to get your mind off unpleasant things: I'm sorry if you've done it before, if you're repeating yourself or just sick of this, but could you please tell us in detail how you think the first father-son exchange would happen between Laguna and Squall. Would Laguna be telling Squall? Would someone else have already told Squall? Would Squall have figured it out on his own? Would they both already know and know each other already knows? How does "The Conversation" go down?

Oh geez, haha. Well…again, this is another thing that could go a lot of different ways, depending on a hundred variables. I can tell you my personal headcanon but it’s not necessarily that I think that’s the only way it could go–I don’t think it is–but it’s the one I ended up liking best when I was exploring all those possibilities. 

First, my Squall…doesn’t really like Laguna that much. Not even that he thinks he’s a bad person, or anything. But he’s embarrassing. And, in Squall’s head, a screwup, of massive proportions, who failed his way to the presidency and now lives in comfort and gets to be reunited with Ellone while Raine is six feet under and a bunch of other people have had to go out of their way to save his sorry ass times and again for him to enjoy the life he now lives. 

But for all that, it really wouldn’t be so bad, just so long as Squall never has to have anything to do with him, personally. 

My Squall, perhaps unfortunately for himself, was smart enough to figure it out on his own, although he did so post-game. He was in the middle of finalizing his report about the entire experience of what we think of as game time, when he realized he was missing a detail he’d be asked about if he didn’t include it: Raine’s last name. So he does his research and manages to find it (he didn’t know if she’d taken Laguna’s name or not, and he wasn’t about to ask). What he found, however, was dated; not her married name, but her maiden name. I personally like the idea that Leonhart was originally hers. 

All the pieces fall in place. Everything about everything suddenly makes sense, and Squall hates what he now knows must be true. Laguna’s lucky he was nowhere nearby at the time. 

To reiterate, it’s not that Squall thinks Laguna is a bad person. He just thinks he’s a bad everything else. Bad soldier. Bad friend. Bad romantic interest. Bad climber. Bad boyfriend. Bad uncle…and non-existent father. 

He’s a screwup from start to finish. He’s a fool who exists on charisma and everyone else’s charity. A klutz. A moron. He’s literally everything Squall aspires never to be. And now he’s related to him. It’s a living nightmare. In Squall’s head. 

And the expectations. Now he knows what it was that Laguna had said he wanted to tell him about, back on the Ragnarok. And he doesn’t ever want to hear it. He doesn’t want anyone to ever link the two of them, in any way. And he sure as hell doesn’t want Laguna claiming any sort of credit for Squall’s accomplishments. He’s afraid that people will start looking for similarities between them just because they’re blood related, and the very thought makes him feel ill. 

Because, he’s not a screwup. He didn’t leave anyone to go gallivanting around the world pretending to be a journalist. He didn’t shrug off his family to be president. He hasn’t abandoned anyone. And in his mind, Laguna has. Over, and over. 

He doesn’t want to make amends, or give Laguna some sort of second chance (there was never a first) with him. He doesn’t want to find out what he was missing, because as far as he’s concerned, he wasn’t missing anything at all. He had Ellone, and Matron. That’s all he knew, and that’s fine. He couldn’t miss Laguna or Raine because he never had them to begin with. And he’s sure as hell not planning on starting, now. 

So, he sits on the knowledge, and stews in it. Tells no one (though Rinoa does pry it out of him in private, which leads to a an interesting discussion on how she empathizes with not wanting to be anything like your dad, but, well, that’s another story). Hopes no one else says anything, no one else figures it out. And meanwhile, wonders why–why didn’t Ellone tell me?

The first meetup he does have with Laguna afterward is pretty cold. Everything to the point. Get in, say what you wanna say, get out. But…eventually, they have to discuss it, and when they do, it’s not too pretty. A lot of I’m-Not-Mad-I-Just-Don’t-Care sentiments from Squall. And oh, by the way–don’t you dare tell anyone, ever, about it. You don’t get to fix this, because I’m not broken. Thank you and goodnight. 

He leaves Laguna all but cowering in a corner. But for what it’s worth, Laguna does what he’s asked, and never breathes a word of it in any public sense. Even the friends who followed him in that Great Ultimecia Adventure don’t learn of it for months. 

And it’s best, anyway, if Squall and Laguna’s names are never confused; after all, it would be a PR nightmare if the world learned that one of the most influential SeeDs in Garden is…the President of Esthar’s son. Talk about corruption accusations. No, thanks. 

It takes time–somewhere around a decade–of uncomfortable visits with Laguna and other interactions, before Squall finally calms enough to acknowledge Laguna as his progenitor, if not his father. Part of that was just growing up some, and part of it was the fact that Ellone genuinely, truly loves Laguna, and wants more than anything for the three of them to be a family. It’s a hard discussion to have with her…that he can’t share her dream. It’s hers…not his. And that’s a painful thing to realize, when you’re talking about the long-lost sister who was your Everything. Shouldn’t he want what she wants, shouldn’t he be willing to suffer in her name? It takes a lot of soul-searching to arrive at his final answer: Suffering in her name wouldn’t actually give Ellone the reunion she wanted. If it wasn’t genuine, she’d be able to tell. So, he had to let her down, and it was one of the hardest things he’d ever done: This is your dream and I don’t want it. It’s your past, and I don’t belong there. 

He belongs in the present, her grown brother who still, after all this time separated, remembers her and cares about her. There’s an entire lifetime ahead of them, and that’s where he wants to be, as her family. Not in the past, pretending to live out things that never happened. It’s a sort of turning point, for the both of them, and allows them to reclaim a lot more of the familial closeness they’d thought they’d lost to time. His opinion of Laguna has warmed somewhat by this point…he still thinks the guy’s a screwup, but at least he’s a well-meaning one, rather than someone who just doesn’t care. He’s still not fond of being associated with Laguna or compared to him, but he’s able to talk to him, at least, without leaving the room in a huff. 

So that was maybe a bit more than you asked for, but it was fun to type up while I was damn near falling asleep. And yes, this helps…all of it does. Thank you.