#someone come talk to me about this i have too many thoughts

[henry7931]

Billy’s College Adventure Part 3

Samuel:

“Good Morning,” says Billy to me from my body.I almost have to do a double take after seeing myself laying next to me.

“Morning,” I say with a grin.

“So it’s Saturday, what do you have planned for us Mr. Bodythief?,”

“Well you’re gonna just have to dressed to find out,” I say back.

“Booooo!!!”

I stand up and Billy tosses a pillow at me.

“Relax! I’ll tell you more, let’s just get ready,” I say winking at him.

We both get dressed and it took all of my energy not to ask him if we could hook up in the shower.

I’m starting to really like Billy but I have this weird thing about getting too attached to a guy. Especially with the assholes I’ve dated in the past. I’ve just been burned too many times although Billy seems different…

I don’t know…I just don’t want him to think I’m too clingy. Which I now realize is an oxymoron since we are literally in each other’s bodies.

Anyways enough about my feels.

Billy and I head back to my apartment.

“This place looks familiar,” says Billy sarcastically.

“It’s not much especially compared to your place but it’s my temporary home,” I say back.

“Ohhh come this isn’t bad at all!”

“Billy you’re in a full ass house,” I say rolling my eyes.

“Okay, you’re right. I’m just the rich privileged kid.”

“Well, I’m glad you’re at least aware,” I say pushing your shoulder.

“So what’s the game plan? Are we just gonna stand around in your apartment?”

“ No. I need the book that my great uncle left me.”

I head into my room and open up my closet. I grab the book from the top shelf.

“So Billy, are you ready to put your powers to test?”

“Geez, I think so.”

“Good!”

I start scrolling through the book digging for the part where it talks about the power of having to swappers.

“Here it is!”

I’d start skimming through it and get to a specific part.

I start reading aloud, “ one swapper is powerful, but their abilities can be limited… but with two swappers now that’s some real power. Rarely in our culture you will see two swappers who are capable of getting along… But if two swappers can conjoin powers together, they can do some really interesting things. For instance, swapping and creating a new reality . Two swappers have the ability to swap two individuals bodies, and change the perception of reality where both individuals think that the body they are in has always been their body. Essentially, neither one of them know that they are swapped and everyone else around them thinks that has been their body the whole time.”

I stopped reading for a second and look up a Billy to see what his thoughts were about what I just read.

“ are you gonna keep going?”

“ well yeah, what do you think though?”

“ I think that’s pretty freaking cool. I mean it could be a little bit messed up, but I’m kind of interested to try it.”

“ Really? Are you 100% sure?”

“ yeah let’s do it!”

I continue to read the rest of the page and I get through all of the instructions.

“ OK Billy, now we have to find some guinea pigs.”

“ I mean, should we start with someone we know or try it with a stranger first?”

“ Well I think I controlled environment would be best. Somewhere where we cant let them walk away and lose them immediately after the swap.”

“Smart!”

“ I’m a genius right? Also, Billy, this doesn’t have to be the first one we try.”

“Wait, what else can two swappers do?”

“Do you want me to tell you about all the other swap powers or can I jump right to the one I really want to try?”

"HOW MANY MORE ARE THERE?!?"

"Let's start with this one, third party possession. Or I like to call it-- a person puppet. Basically one of us can take over someone body without leaving the one we are in habiting. It's like two bodies at once."

"Does that person know that you or I have taken over their body?"

"No... I have read this one over a couple of times now. Basically they will be in a unaware state while one of us are in control."

"Okay, I guess that one sounds less chaotic. Who should we try it on?"

I thought about it for a minute and then I had someone in mind. I peaked out at the window to see if my neighbor was home.

"I got someone who could work," I say with a mischievous grin.

“Who?”

“My neighbor Reid, you’ll like him or at least his body lol.”

“Wait am I going to possess him?!?”

“Yeah, I think you’ll like it.”

“Fuck, fine! Let’s do this!!”

I grab Billy’s or I guess my hands and say, “I want you to focus. Thinking about all of your powers almost like you’re about to swap with someone, okay?”

“Got it.”

“Now close your eyes and picture a part of yourself floating out of my body, not all of yourself… just a part.”

“Okay…”

“Can you see it?”

It takes a minute for Billy to focus but then I see our hands and they start glowing a bit.

“I can see it,” he says softly.

“Great, now picture that second half of you floating out the window to the house door.”

Billy’s closed eyes move shut.

“I’m in the neighbor’s house… I can see everything inside. Wait, I hear someone… sleeping… now I’m in his room. Holy shit! I can see him!!”

“Really?!? Now Billy this is what you’re going to do next, float into him. Doesn’t matter how you do it.”

Billy’s eyes spring open and he says, “I’m in him. I feel his body… it’s so strange Sam. I’m him and I’m me.”

“Well come on over lol!”

“Okay one sec.”

A few minutes later and our front door swings open. It’s my neighbor’s body.

“What’s up you sexy fellas!!”

I turn to Billy and then back at Reid’s body as they are both grinning cheek to cheek.

I watch as Billy coordinates Reid’s body over to a chair.

“Look at these muscles Sam!,” says Reid’s body

“Fuck this is so hot! I’m watching myself control him, it’s like I can do some kind of strange role play. Wait a minute!!”

Reid’s body tugs off his tank top and then his shoes and socks.

He stares down at the giant feet and says, “they’re big.”

I watch as he picks up foot and smells it. He rubs Reid face all over his massive foot.

“This is so wrong but I’m so turned on. You’re gonna either have to watch or join us.”

Billy still in my body walks over to the giant hunk and reaches into his shorts.

They say in unison, “that feels good.”

I was starting to get hard just watching both bodies interact. Billy started running my hands over Reid’s muscles.

He pulls off Reid shorts and underwear. His dick comes out and both of us marvel at the giant cock.

“Let’s take turns with it,” he says from Reid’s body. “Shit I meant to say that from your body!”

We both laugh and I say, “All good lol, bedroom?”

“Great idea! You fellas are gonna have fun with me aren’t you? Especially this giant cock!,” says Reid’s body standing up while shaking his dick.

“Yes sir,” I say to him.

Billy picks me up in Reid’s arms and carries me to my bed.

We all three climb in and Billy asks me, “could you tend Reid’s junk.”

“Sure!!”

I grab onto the massive dick girthy dick. It’s surprising to see just how big it is.

“Are you gonna just stare it or suck it?,” says Reid’s body.

I turn to Billy down by Reid’s feet. He’s giggling and says, “sorry, I have two hard dick right now!”

I try to take as much of Reid’s I could fit in my mouth. It’s just so big. I get the entire thing wet and use a hand to work the shaft and his big hairy balls.

Billy on the other hand pulls off my pants and begins using Reid’s feet for a foot job.

Both of them moan in unison and say, “FUCK! You have no idea how amazing this feels!!”

I pump Reid’s dick faster and faster…

Both of them moan louder and louder….

Billy in my body reaches up under his ass cheeks and fondles his my body’s cock for me.

“LET ME FINISH IN MY MOUTH PLEASE SAM!,” he screams out.

I’m forcing Billy’s throat down on Reid’s dick.

Both of them scream out, “FUCKKKKKKKK!!!!”

That’s when rounds of cum squirt down my throat. It fills my throat and I can’t take anymore.

I look down at Reid’s dick and it’s still pouring more and more out.

Billy in my body cums all over Reid’s feet both of them grinning.

I fall back on the bed and both my body and Reid’s body with Billy still in control use themselves to give me every inch of pleasure.

Billy in my body climbs to my face and start making out. He twist’s his actual body’s sensitive nipples. Meanwhile Reid’s body sucking me off and tickling Billy body’s ballsack.

I can’t only take so much before I blew my load into Reid’s mouth…

All three or two… I don’t know… we just lay back cuddled up.

I turn to Billy in my body and say, “That was amazing.”

Billy grins and says, “we are definitely going to try this again!”

[emsdevs]

🎁 14 with quinn 👀

a/n: kirby my love, this one is for you 🧡 i know you love your angst

Prompt 14: "Please. Please just listen to me."

Birthday Celly 2025 Masterlist | masterlist

You never thought it would come to this. You thought you and Quinn were forever. Everything had been perfect until you had started seeing less and less of him. You couldn’t remember the last time you’d been on a date, and he barely held a conversation with you now. You knew bringing it up would be difficult, but you hadn’t imagined it would blow up like this.

“Quinn, we barely talk anymore! When was the last time you kissed me? A real kiss, not some reflexive kiss on the cheek when you get home from a roadie!” you weren’t sure when it started, but the two of you have been shouting back and forth so long your throat is starting to feel scratchy.

“That’s not fair! Do you know how busy I am?”

“Oh, trust me I know! The only thing I hear about anymore is the Canucks! The team needs this! The team can’t do that! God, Quinn, even when you were hurt and had absolutely no business being on that ice, you couldn’t shut up about your team! Sometimes, it’s like you forget I even exist! Like I’m just some housemaid or someone to come to when you need relief! Except we don’t even do that anymore do we?”

“Maybe it’s because you’re so clingy! I mean, Jesus, I barely get a moment to myself! You’re so obsessed with me! This isn’t even that serious!” 

Your face goes blank the second the words leave his mouth. This isn’t even that serious? He didn’t tell you he wanted to break up, but with those five words, Quinn just ended your relationship.

“It isn’t that serious?” you’re fuming now, and he can tell by how level your voice is. “So what? You’ve been stringing me along for over two years? Let me move in? You remember me having to get permanent residency for this right? All of that and it’s not serious?”

“Babe don’t-”

“No you’re right, Quinn. I’m leaving. You can have your space back. I’d hate to take it anymore since you so obviously don’t want me here,” you head to what was a shared bedroom not even two hours ago. You pack all your bags, at least what you would need for a couple of days, and Quinn does nothing but stand there and watch. He doesn’t speak up again until you’re leaving the bedroom and heading for the front door with your suitcase in tow.

“Baby, c’mon. You’re being dramatic. Where are you even gonna stay?”

“Oh, no! Clingy and dramatic! Guess I really need to get out of your hair then. And where I’m staying is not of your concern anymore,” you roll your eyes, attempting to continue on your path to the door when he blocks it.

“Please. Please just listen to me. It doesn’t have to end like this. We don’t have to end like this,” he’s begging now, and as pitiful as he looks, you can’t find it in yourself to care anymore. You’re tired of sitting around, waiting for him to give you attention like some dog sitting at the door waiting for its owner to return. You have to get out.

“Just stop, Quinn. It’s done. We’re done. No second chances. I’ve given you too many to begin with. If you didn’t want this to end, you should’ve tried harder to keep me before it was too late. Hopefully, you can find someone a little less clingy and obsessive.”

You walk away, not looking back once the door is shut. You just closed a huge chapter in your life. Anyone else would probably be rejoicing right now, basking in the feeling of being free from a situation that wasn’t good. Somehow, though, you can’t help but feel like this might have been a mistake.

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[dellamortethelesser]

The Wigmaker Job

Notes and Thoughts - Part 3

pt1 | pt2 | pt3 | pt4 | pt5

DISCLAIMER: These posts I'm doing are my own analyses and are done with the intentional eye to examine the relationship between Lucanis and Illario. I try to source all my assertions from what the text is giving me. This is not Lucanis critical nor should it be taken as such.

Going to be a shorter post today because I have things to do this morning!

Starting off strong in the next scene with me… loving on the fashion notes <3 So glad to know that we get stiletto heels clicking against cobblestone. Surely hoping that no magister twists their ankle and falls and breaks their fucking neck because their shoe got caught in a gap!

Also, velveteen is in? Someone who knows fabrics weigh in and tell me if that would be an appropriate material for the climate.

"So the Wigmaker. Tell me about him." / "He's weird." ← Lucanis goes on to say that he 'finds the moment before a job crucial for focus, but Illario was never one for comfortable silence'. To me, that beggars the explanation that the following passage is Illario goading him a bit.

I: "Specifics, cousin. No one hires us to kill normal people." L: "I gave you a dossier." I: "Yes, but I want your assessment." L: "I wrote it. It is my assessment." I: "Humor me." L: "You'll see soon enough."

There was a little bit of debate in my previous post about whether or not Illario actually read Lucanis's dossier. I don't think that the text supports that interpretation, but everyone is allowed to interpret what they want.

I'll argue that Illario has read the dossier: throughout the story up until this point, Illario has made comments about the job that implies he has SOME understanding of what they are doing—even going out of his way to make arrangements with a tailor so that he can be prepared for the part of the contract that Lucanis asked him to help with.

He knows that they need to be in Minrathous, at a party, facing a 'premiere wigmaker', and aware of the fact that they're up against Venatori. He knew they needed to be at a mansion and all of this comes up previous to this point when asking about Lucanis's assessment.

Additionally, asking for more clarification on something that someone else wrote is actually normal when the plan has clearly changed several times. Illario has increasingly expressed confusion on how the navigation is being handled, and, when asking for more information, is specifically asking after the Wigmaker himself, not the entire plan.

Also, the narrator is telling us that Lucanis prefers to be quiet while Illario likes to talk. It was pointed out to the me that this is close third POV, so why would the narrator bring that difference up, and not reference the idea that Illario has a tendency to not read documents?

(A few paragraphs later, while balancing on the rooftops, it's stated that 'At least Illario was too busy concentrating to ask questions'.) ← I wonder why he'd need to ask so many… I'm not trying to be snarky, but I am trying to make a point and using the text to support it. This also is NOT Lucanis crit and I'm worried some people are interpreting it as such.

The commentary from Lucanis about the previous Minrathous parties is insane btw. Retching vases? Acrobats? An orgy? No wonder they kept us in Dock Town in VG… (shakes fist)

First mention of Lucanis's sensitivity toward the Veil. "The backs of his eyeballs itched like he hadn't blinked in days". I think he says this primarily about blood magic at some point in VG? Which tracks and keeps up with WMJ.

"Something's wrong." / "Yeah. We're up here, away from the fun." ← insane of illario to say this i'm sorry. bro there are blood mages down there.

L: "Focus." I: "I am." L: "On the job." I: "To be fair, you never told me the plan."

You guys get it at this point. (That last sentence loops back up to my previous point… Illario has read the dossier. He knows the contract. He does NOT know how Lucanis is going to HANDLE it beyond what he's been asked to do re: getting Lucanis inside).

Lucanis shrugged. "Find Ambrose. Slit his throat." "Sounds complicated." "It will be. The Veil's thin here. Thinner than I expected."

Illario seems pretty fine with this explanation so I am not going to keep dragging it out. I do like how in-tune Lucanis seems to be with his abilities! I wish we could've seen more of that in VG; iirc he doesn't comment on the state of the Veil or magic very often?

This is the part of the story where we get to see their back-and-forth and how Illario is a bit of a rake! Which I personally enjoy. I love a manwhore (*said affectionately). Sorry.

"Plenty of time for some good, old-fashioned debauch—" I think he's funny. And maybe a bit distracted.

The narrator describes Ambrose as 'of average height and build' which is a description that pisses me off when fanfic does it and published works are not immune to my ire. What the hell is 'average'. That's so subjective.

The rest of the description is nice, though: hawkish gold eyes and a jaw that could break teeth. ← I know I said this was a breakdown of the brothercousin dynamic but I need to weigh in on other things sometimes. <3 Heart.

"They're never what you envision, are they?" Illario noted. "What did you expect?" "Hair, for one. Maybe a funny little dog." That got a chuckle out of Lucanis, if only briefly.

Stop being funny!!! I do like this banter back and forth because this feels like it's the least… leaden with underlying, complicated dynamics? I like it a lot and it feels natural for them.

Making notes on the fashion of the guard-captain. 'She wore an emerald gown with a high-waisted, low-tiered skirt and a fitted tulle bodice studded with champagne-colored crystals. Metallic body paint shimmered on her exposed arms and legs'. ← Fascinating.

It sounds like it might be a reference to the women's fashion from the Tevinter concept art. Bit gaudy.

Also it's described as silk-brocade. AGAIN PEOPLE WHO KNOW FABRICS WEIGH IN.

[shrek meme] she's not even wearing velveteen.

Lucanis "I need those keys" Dellamorte and Illario "your wish is my command, cousin" Dellamorte you will always be famous to me. Also it says that Illario 'flipped forward' which . why are we doing all that

Quotes are either paraphrased or taken directly from The Wigmaker Job, written by Courtney Woods.

[mawlbone]

PLAYBOY BUNNY - KÖNIG

[SNIPPET: Never in your life had you paid much much interest towards the more… pet-ish sort of outfits. You know, the type of stuff you’ll find in the bedroom to be a little more wild from ears embedded headband, tail plugs, and hell, even collars. Though, when one of your older customer dropped off their old collection of Playboy magazines as an “extra tip” for your work, who are you to deny such a gesture?]

[CW: gender neutral reader, domtop reader, possessive reader (it’s mutual), flemish giant hybrid König, mention of childhood bullying, mild hunting description, praise kink, fingering, non-specific penetration (could be interpreted as dick or strap), sloppy riding, dry-humping, breeding kink, overstimulation, biting, missionary sex, doggy style, and sleepy sex.]

[COMMENT: Promised sequel to Lucky Rabbit’s Foot, please read that first. Apologies for how overdue this is, this month had kept me terribly busy, have fun kissing the big guy. I promise to be nice for the most part! But then I got angry at my draft being deleted and writing too much in the exposition… Sigh, on a final note, don’t ask for any kits, do you want to cause an overpopulation problem in this world! /lh]

Out of the many things you had learned since you had taken over your grandfather’s cabin and many long ago car rides together, one that constantly proves itself true time after time again is that people are utterly talkative when they’re lonely.

Year after year, when the town brings its daily rounds of tourists to celebrate the holidays, many of the residents will speak about you, the hermit that resides in the depths of the forests with nothing more than their gun and bags to send to the local butcher in town.

At least, that’s what the bar regulars say.

An unconventional job bad brought words of envy from your local bar’s residents as they swing over heavy jugs of cheap watery beers. Half fizzled from the barley with eyes that once spoke of brighter dreams, you hear them murmur within their daze as they take your ear to complain about the newfound loneliness in their lives now: the emptiness they feel in their 9-5 jobs, the lack of friendship they can keep, and disappearing free time to go explore life more. All of it they lament to you how nice it would be constantly outside and surrounded by nothing but the warm silence and greener grass every time you come and visit.

You have half a mind to protest those thoughts.

There’s nothing admirable in what you do: between the daily rounds of shooting, harvesting, and selling whatever scraps of meat and bones after sustaining yourself— what exactly is so admirable about it? With bloodied clothes rotten into a grimy brown when you’re done for the day and a heavier heart knowing all of your catches were simply a wrong-place-wrong-time as you once again steadied your rifle at the wounded creature for a quick death with a soft click.

But you don’t, no point in arguing about something like this, wondering about the limits of a “necessary sacrifice” too much.

And when you have to deal with months of being left on your own for the majority of the year, eventually you will learn to tune out your peers never-ending nagging for you to find a companion to accompany you in that empty cabin of yours before it’s all too late and you’re too grey and aching to settle.

”Wouldn’t it be nice to have someone waiting for you at home with a hot plate and to warm your bed while you’re away?”

From doctors and far-away friends, those type of sentiments never ends. While you are comforted by their worries, you never expected your long-time customers to join in as well when they hear about you in the bar as well…

Especially when one of them placed the box of indecent mags into your arms with the most shit-eating grin you ever seen saying the stuff will keep you company before driving off in a puff of clouds with that stupidly big red truck of his. You can distantly hear some midwest emo band booming out of the windows as he fades away into the distance with nothing more than the vibrant autumn leaves blowing behind him.

Usually you would had typically complained about such junk being left behind for you to deal with but— ‘the bunny suits are quite cute…’

You quietly thought to yourself, when you made your way back home, comfy on your worn leather couch with a mug in hand flipping through thick raunchy pages filled with hundreds of women dolled up in their colorful 60s cocktail suits in their complete bunny ensemble. From the fluffy yarn tail and bent bunny ears as they decorate themselves with big ol’ lashes and lace, honestly you felt a bit endeared by it.

The sharp cuts of skin as they prance around on the wide spread of pages and contort their bodies to meet the camera’s gaze to appease whoever is behind it, perhaps was a bit silly in your eyes.

While their intimidation will never come close to your big rabbit’s adorableness, you had to admit, those suits were quite a sight for sore eyes. Page by page, you moved from complete nudes to admire the cutesy blues and pinks to admire the classic black satin bunny suits tightly hugging the women’s figures snuggly.

Perhaps it’s a bit amusing to you, as a huntsman to watch the way people tried to make themselves more approachable: smaller, weaker, cuter— something worthy of being loved despite how non-animalistic they were. With naturally rounded nails, blunt teeth, and a lack of proper fur on skin to protect oneself from the cold, it’s no wonder why humans moved to advancing themselves to be stronger, all while attempting to return to a state of harmlessness just for the sake of being adored.

Maybe you’re just being critical.

There’s no harm in wanting to be liked, everyone does. Such is the nature of men. Perhaps you once felt that way before, but you’re older now, simply content with the hermit life you with your fewest closest friends to keep you company for the few times you all are able to meet throughout the year.

Plus, your big rabbit will be coming back soon. It’s nearly winter now, you can tell by the way the crisp winter breeze over your bare face every time you come outside to talk a walk around the forest.

It been three years since you made an unlikely relationship with König, the giant flemish rabbit that got his foot stuck in one of your traps. Yes, your giant huffy rabbit who is much too smart for his own good.

Sure, you never heard of a rabbit who can somehow open and closes doors when you shut him out to do work, or a rabbit who somehow can tell the time for meals, or even one that learned to wipes his paws on your floor mat before walking in your home after you scold him for bringing dirt onto your floors.

But he’s yours even if it’s just for the winter.

No way you’ll sell your long-eared friend, even if he breaks your wallet when you splurge on importing out of season berries for him to munch on. Though you do worry about him eating your meats occasionally, remembering the multiple occasions where he’ll furiously bounce off your lap to chase after your sandwich despite your complaints, but you did find a little laugh in you when he goes immediately bouncing away whenever you needed to change your dirtied clothes while he was in the same room as you.

It’s whatever, you don’t want no mad scientists knocking at your door to dissect your rabbit’s brain. If anything, they might take you and him if they see your sticky note galore all over your bedroom’s walls, something that you long had reduced after watching König chew on them. After watching you fuss and shoo him away from them, you could had sworn you remembered him smiling from beneath his fluff after he watched you cleaned up your cluttered papers.

Taking one last sip of your mug, you made sure to make a mental note to place the magazines somewhere high so that he won’t chew on them as well as you had long learned your rabbit is not fond of indecency…

Changing in front of him one time after getting your clothes covered in dirt from gardening had led him to flee under your couches and refusing to meet your eye or even cuddle you that entire winter, but you managed to cox him with treats finally when he came back around again.

Oh well, as your hands slammed the magazine shut, you made a note to place them high above your shelves so König won’t find them.

Winter is coming soon after all, and you can’t wait to see your fluffy friend once more.

—

While winter will bring its usual cheer and shimmer with carols and bells ringing up everyone’s doors, but for a lonely hunter? The cold snow will rush in a giant black rabbit squeezing his head into the dog door, something you had installed before when you didn’t made it home in time to let him in and leaving him to deal with the elements.

It’s something you had long cried about, furiously apologizing to the rabbit while clutching him to your chest before he butted your mouth shut, tired of hearing you sob for so long. He has a thick coat, he was fine, so be quiet now won’t you? There’s no need to feel bad.

So upon stepping into your empty cabin, he figured you had long been out dropping off last minute orders again.

Busy human you are…

It won’t take long for him to snoop around in his human form as he shifts, making sure to take his sweet time to stretch around. He can feel the way his bones crackle as his limbs bend and fold underneath his weight. Oh well, might as well through your shelves, just go and see if you added anything new since the last time he came.

Perhaps he shouldn’t been nosy, maybe that would had saved him from finding the the dozens of dog eared pages on your shelf littering his vision as his eyes dart back and froth at the scantily-clad ladies dressed up to the nines in the cheekiest bunny suits König had ever seen.

With the tight satin bows and lace wrapped around their forms, König could feel the heat arising onto his cheeks as his hands suddenly dropped the magazines with a loud “plop” onto your floors to rub his heated face, suddenly feeling very bothered, fiddling around occasionally squeezing his floppy hanging ears for comfort.

Why was he acting so shocked for? It’s not like you were some saint. Neither were you and him were something more than friends— So why is he so upset for?!

Humans and hybrids were already forbidden from interacting in the first place, that’s the one rule he had engraved into his brain until it became nothing more than another wrinkle on it. It’s what all hybrids learn as soon as they could speak, safety and survival, survival and safety. Do not approach the humans.

But König had never been the best listener, especially when he already been outcasted for being so big. Eating too much, growing too much, there was little he can do to appease his colony. A nuisance really, how can one grow so big?

‘He’ll do horrible in the winter, why bother keeping him around…’

Perhaps that’s why he’s so attached to you— you’re nothing but a giver of easy affection. Long cold days are filled with you cuddling him on your lap as you stroke his ears and kiss his face, calling him your baby and such.

He had to put a foot down at some names however when you poke his behind, calling him a “little mop” while he was eating some of your leftover egg salad.

But back to the present, as he takes one final glance over the playboy magazines on the floor, he wonders deeply of whether you’ll accept him like this. Half rabbit and human and all, something more in between that props couldn’t do… You seem to really like a half rabbit based off the pages so— you shouldn’t mind if he became your only choice, right as his equally large hands begin to crumble the photos.

There’s something funny squeezing his chest, he isn’t sure what it is, but it’s quite uncomfortable and all stuck in his throat as he breaths, only relieving itself more and more as he rips another magazine underneath his nails.

Maybe it’s something that he had been long avoiding. Something that is undeniably rabbit in his skin beneath covers back at the base. A heavy hand pushing down on the tent in his place thinking about how you’re strong enough to provide for him with all your territory in his dumb little rabbit brain.

He’ll be well protected. He won’t have to worry about safety anymore. It’ll be nice. So nice. He won’t have to come back to the dens anymore to appease his needs anymore.

It must be simple instincts for why he’s falling so fast.

Yes, that’s what must be it…

No such thing like fickleness of love awaits for him. It’s a rabbit’s nature to live fast and breed fast, no room for anything else.

But surely you can come to accept him in this form too if you have these lying around. Even if he is a little more realistically than the bunny girls in the magazines, right?

—

There’s very few things that makes you frustrated with life.

Whether that be taxes or bad customers, coming home to a mess of ripped and scattered papers at your door is the newest thing on that list when you came home from your orders to see what looked like an absolute tornado had ran though your living room.

Ripped bits of your playboy magazines scattered your vision as piles and piles of spewed about your home. Your once clean rooms now stuck in disarray with nothing more than the lingering mess of an upset rabbit.

Well, guess he was able to grab the box after all, you contemplate to yourself as you set your bags down.

Kicking aside a barely holdable magazine by your feet, you decided to follow the trial of scattered papers into your bedroom already wondering what ways you can appease your rabbit.

As you twist the knob, you can distantly hear the sound of claws scratching against your mattress as you sigh, pressing forward to swing the door open. With a loud “thump”, you step back, taking a moment for your eyes to adjust to the darkness of your room as your eyes scan over the familiarity of your aligned drawers and astray piles of unfinished laundry before your eyes fall on the abnormally large bump hidden beneath your bed covers as you stared, confused.

‘Surely a giant flemish can’t go through another growth spurt. Is that even possible? Did you fed him too much?’

You thought as you slowly, you approach the bed making sure to make your footsteps apparent to not scare him before gently patting the giant bump.

“König~”, you cooed, softly shaking the massive figure underneath your blankets. “What’s wrong baby?, I wasn’t that late. Don’t be too mad at me…” Attempting to coax your friend

Your hands smoothed over the wrinkles of the blankets, gliding them over the massive form. You really didn’t want to go through another winter without being able to cuddle him, he’s pretty much the only warmth you have regularly.

But when an undeniably human sob escaped from your covers instead of the usual sniffles your rabbit makes— immediately you didn’t stop yourself from ripping away your covers.

Your mind races as the downpour of cold sweat shrivels down your spine as you grabbed the sheets off. Cursing and all as you wrestled with the man underneath as you rustled with the sheets.

Please, anything but him— You beg to yourself. Stricken with the immediate grief of losing something dear once more in this sad life of yours.

But when your sheets were pulled away to reveal an awfully large man with huge floppy black ears running down on the side of his face as he stares at you with the saddest baby blue eyes you ever seen on his droopy face desperately trying to cover himself, ashamed as he squirms around in your grasp.

He struggles madly, almost like a buck on the loose as you fought with the stranger as strong nails caught onto your arms, not enough for you bleed but held yourself back from pinning down the man further when a familiar red collar wrapped around the fluff of his neck quickly caught your attention.

You aren’t exactly dumb to not connect the dots… But heavens, could someone give you some grace when you had to take a few moments to collect yourself! The last thing you could had expected is your dearly beloved rabbit is to turn into some— man-rabbit-thing overnight.

Well… That explains his abnormal intelligence and all now. Slowly, you let up your hold on König, still placing him firmly underneath you. Just in case if your friendship with him suddenly means nothing to him and he’ll go forever missing from you.

You decide to gaze upon the man once more, taking a long deep moment to take in the sight.

From the short black hair and wide blue eyes staring you down, you dared to caress his face as the man shivered. Smoothing your hand over his soft cheeks, your thumb brushes upon his brow and then down to the leftover scruffiness of his beard. Gently, softly, and slowly you moved your hands all over, admiring the strangeness he possess. You hear König begin to stamper as a widening smile begins to form upon your face. It’s strangely nostalgic, this moment between you two. Having him in your grasp, something hot rushes in your skin as you begin to laugh loudly, joyously at your friend’s new form.

He’s terribly cute, what is this nonsense? How dare he keeps this sight away from you! You complained silently as you reached down to begin kissing his forehead and squeezing those velvet laid ears of his to your heart’s delight as he squawks, embarrassed at your shamelessness once more.

Truly animals evolved to be too adorable to kill…

After much half-hearted struggles against your hold to satisfy your touch addiction with one last bite of his ears before dodging a swift punch, both of you finally settled upon your bed again.

You silently thank your past self for investing in a larger bed because no way can you and him can fit on your old twin size bedding.

König lays beneath you. Not meeting your eyes. Never moving, still. You could’ve mistake him for some poor road-killed animal as you laid between his strong legs, letting you enjoy yourself with squeezing the thick muscles underneath all that fat and the strangeness of rabbit hair brushed across that human skin.

Perhaps a moment had passed.

Maybe two.

You weren’t keeping count, too amused with squeezing his flesh as he laid, stiffed up in what looks like his deathbed.

But between the dead of the room, slowly those small warbled whispers beings to pour from your friend of how deeply sorry he was for deceiving, how he never intended to mask himself this long within the quiet. He was scared, he says, of what you’ll think of him, of when you’ll cast him away into the bitter cold to die because you couldn’t stand such a freak inside your walls. He continues, confessing his shame, how he was sorry for ripping up those magazines when he came back home because he got vicarious angry at the thought of someone taking his place. For those thoughts blistered inside his chest until it blackened and decayed into a gruel mush, something that was familiar to him once long before he had to run away from it. He explained how he tried to sleep it off while waiting for you to sooth his worries like you always do, he wasn’t expecting to shift during his nap and when you came in— it was just too late to hide from you.

And with those bated breaths, he now waits, still, once more for you. And from above, you take a moment to take in everything around you. You can hear the rumbles of your old radiator heaving outside your room, the drips of your constant sobbing sink, and mad winds banging against your windows to be let in your warm home.

All of it, you take in as König lays underneath you.

There are many things you can say in this moment. But there are also many things you can also just keep secret. You can say how you understand him, how you too are constantly afraid of other people around you, just thinking and existing within the same space, struggling and wondering if you are breathing too loudly, blinking too little, or looking a bit too unkept for them to harbor a dislike for you. But vulnerability is a soft organ gutted with nothing but squishy mass with nowhere to defend itself, and you aren’t too willing to expose such a soft jelly thing. So you decide to keep it short, merely saying how you will never abandon him because he’s your friend as his eyes widened, dead stiff hands now finally moving to properly hold onto you.

Maybe you’re going insane in your isolation but— he’s pretty much the only comfort you have, and he never did anything malicious to you as a rabbit so you’re not really keen on letting him escape. What hunter does such a thing when a pretty thing falls onto their lap?

He chose to be yours.

Not anyone else.

You hear sobs escape König lips when you press down your face to rub against his own. A gesture, familiar, he recognizes.

It’s what he does to comfort you as a rabbit. Yes, indeed you’re terribly fond of him. That, you can’t deny no longer as you brushed the tears down his round pink-ed cheeks. For you, a human, hunger for flesh the same way all men do. And when a lingering hand presses down his thigh, terribly close to the tent in his boxers, you grinned with glee when he quickly raised his hips in turn, pushing you closer to him with an endearing tilt of his head as those strong legs begin to gather around your waist, daring you to continue down your little trek.

Can anyone blame you when you jumped for the bait?

Oh well, looks like you’ll be in for a long warm winter.

—

You distantly remembered visiting a country fair at some point during one late summer when your grandfather was still alive and hearty and breathing with a characteristic pipe in his hand as you both strolled down the booth, looking to sell your small hunts for the day.

“Something to get you ready when you’re older and out all alone there. You suck at talking, y’know? Can’t charm customers with that shut-mouth of yours”, he said with a little attitude on his tongue. You huffed at his bluntness, too tired from chasing after pests yesterday before you two stepped into a tent-laid alleyway to peer into the petting zoo with its glamours of piglets, sheep, and hamsters all in their caged fences, staring bright-eyed and bushy for you to step in.

Though when you grandfather finally stopped to talk to a familiar face, some acquaintance that came by the cabin often, your eyes wandered about the room, hearing the clatter of voices blending away to an incomprehensible language as you grow grumpier at the uncomfortable heat of the room.

But something had caught your attention from afar you can see a tall wooden sign with splashy red letters listing in embolden letters that there are “Rabbits for Sale!” Curious, it led you wandering over to awe at the sight of sleeping rabbits inside their pen, just hidden within the back and all wrapped up in their hay, obscured and cozy within their own world as you creeped over to watch them.

You aren’t sure why you were so fixated on those creatures. Maybe because you were too used to the occasional possum banging up the cabin’s attic that made you interested in those small creatures. As you stared upon them, too long for you to admit, you can distantly hear someone chattering in your ear. You tuned out most of their words, flying into one ear and out the other, too accustomed to random strangers giving their mind when it’s not needed. But as you stared at those fluffy small rabbits, you distantly hear some snippets, something about “keeping them separate” and them being “fucking maniacs” because they’re so weak that they will keep breeding under any circumstances to continue their lineage.

And today?

You’ll laugh at how true those words are every time you pull on those stupidly soft ears of his, earning you a small squeal at the jolt of pain-turned-pleasure as his screams fall on deaf ears with every sweet thrust against his ass, switches between pleas for more and more outta you before attempting to run away as his feet kicks violently at the sheets as you push more soft little noises from his chapped lips..

‘How silly, your little bunny is’, you thought to yourself, as you paused to reach over to bite his meaty arms and cover them anew with deep marks up and down his arms as he moans into your ears, mewling as he takes this moment to catch his breaths. Long hefty gulps of oxygen rattles his lungs as he cries and complains at your bullying as he rubs his sore ears. The pleasure still had not left his bones as he tenses his hole, still feeling the remnants of your presence inside him when you pulled out to admire his debauchery. It wasn’t long before he begin meanly snipping at you to pick up the pace once more as he spreads his legs wider as a mixture of lube and cum sloppily drips down from the loosened opening before his head falls onto the mattress, passing out in pure exhaustion.

Fucking hell… You sigh at the sight, as you moved to take care of him.

There must be some sickness inside your head telling you to pick apart König more and more as the time flies by for it. For it been days since you two had left the house. Your back aches from strain. Muscles sore from repetitious movements. And there is a small festering headache arising slowly within your temples but— you can’t stop.

It must be an addiction now when you can feel your mouth salivate like a trained dog every time you see those strong hard-earned muscles collapses underneath you from exhaustion. And you can’t say it should be a surprise to you when you come to the eventual realization that König is utterly so damn needy. Despite your best attempts to sooth his libido with prepping his hole as much as you can at the start, bumping thick knuckles against his good spots only left him on a torturous edge as he fussed around and threatened to leave if you don’t put something in him already.

That of course, pissed you off.

What a fucking brat he is, coming into your house and asking you to appease more of his demands? Who does he think he is?! You finally had enough of that attitude of his that day, deciding to wrestle him to tie his arms together onto his back before you flipped him over onto his stomach to use as a handlebar. And just raising his hips high enough with some pillows for you to slam in immediately as you pushed many nerve-racking releases out of hm.

And oh boy, did you redeem yourself when you pulled those arms back into your hips, forcing out a small cacophony of deep groans and curses out of his throat before making him let out a sharp cry when you grab that fuzzy tail of his to maneuver him around as his dick rubs against the soft covers. Immediately starting his little tirade of how horrible you are before you shut him up with a few hard slams against his prostate and praising him when he did closed his mouth to stop those cute cries from spilling, embarrassed and too angry to give you the satisfaction of teased him as you laughed. That didn’t stop you for noticing how his ears perked up when you called him a “good boy” for “listening to you” as his hips subtly rose to press against you.

Or when you got him to ride you for a bit, thinking how pretty he’ll look atop of you as he crushes your hips. Though… You had to put a foot down when you realized how much he absolutely sucked at riding. With reddened eyes and nose dripping with snot, you watch as König barely raises his body up and down. Weakened from the onslaught of the bruising you had done to his bottom, he could do nothing more than hump against you, pleading you to take over for him. He’s too tired, please do it for him. He can’t, everything burns inside and you’re the only one who can make him feel better he says. Struggling to shake himself awake as those bunny ears flop around his face, and making him look so much more fragile in his ruined galore, freshly fucked and all shiny with afterglow.

You’ll have to ask him later to wear some mascara or eye black next time to watch them drip down his face as you mess him up again.

However, for now, you have to clean your big rabbit while you still can. In those small hours of rest, you’ll bathe and feed König to his heart’s content, nothing more than wiping wet towels across his skin and cleaning the covers as you feed some light foods and water to refresh him.

He had been good and you always will make sure to let him know that. But if he dares to say he’ll leave you one day?

There’s nothing but a little trap that wouldn’t do the trick for a big catch…

[aveli-li]

HEADCANNONS OF GRAYSON X PREGNANT READER (ilysm😼)

Grayson and the Haven

warnings: established relationship, gender neutral reader, pregnant r!, pregnancy mentions, fluff, no smut, minors dni

a/n: LOVE YOU DOLLIE THANK YOU FOR THIS ASK I LOVED MAKING THIS AAAAA the baby fever this gave me is unbearable

♡ be prepared not to move a single finger.

♡ Grayson will not let you do anything that might take risk in the first months of the pregnancy, although you can perfectly do your chores just needing to add care to not force your body a lot, Grayson prefers to have you rested.

♡ If someone makes an offhand comment about your pregnancy or about you, she will make the person who they are talking to.

♡ Grayson will have to balance work with her personal life. It has been a great development since you two got together but since you are carrying her child she makes sure to come home earlier to have more time with you, and of course, checking you all the time.

♡ She understands how suffocating that might be and that you have your life and know how to take care of yourself, but please, this woman is protective by nature. It won't change her in such a vulnerable moment to leave you alone.

♡ She refuses and does rather not take risk quests and situations. Fearing her job could cause some harm to you and your baby, even in the future. If she has to go, she will take double care about it to not worry you and the baby about the mission and as soon as she returns she calls you to hear her voice and how things went well, or a bit tough but most important is that she is safe.

♡ The most lovely place in the world for her is next to you. Her muscled arm marking room for your head to rest, one hand caressing your hair and the other resting on your growing belly, she couldn't ask for anything better.

♡ He helps you build a nest to accommodate your belly once it grows bigger, and you found victory about the many pillows you wanted to buy that she found unnecessary. She helps you through your sleep, rubbing your back, caressing your belly, or massaging your sore legs and hips until you fall asleep again.

♡ Maybe, just maybe, for Grayson, the moment it all became true and realized that you were carrying her child was when she felt their first kick when she was baby talking to your belly. A late moment, but something on her switched, and she realized what she would become in a few months. She had a moment to process it, and couldn't believe that the baby gave this sort of signal when she talked to them.

♡ Grayson doesn't get emotional often, but since the thought of starting a family lightened up on her, you could see her emotional moreover. She doesn’t cry or have outbursts like you (and those damn hormones messing with your feelings), but she tears up in adoration, of finding someone that trusted her, and wanted to start a family with her.

♡ She has moments of doubt. You catch her staring at your belly, lost in thought, but your reassurance words saying that she will be a great mother eases her mind.

♡ And when the moment gets too tough for you, seeing your body changing so much over the weeks, Grayson pulls you into her lap and presses kisses all over your body, saying in a whisper and proudly how breathtaking you look.

♡ Buying clothes and the furniture was tiring but both agreed on the colors and decoration for the room. Grayson built everything, from the small wardrobe to the little crib, a teddy bear placed on the pillow that they will soon hold to sleep.

♡ Some nights, you find her in the baby's room, taking a moment to appreciate everything both are building together.

♡ A pillar of strength, respected by her peers, even feared by some. But with she's was something else, something softer. Grayson had all her love dedicated to you and only you. And now, for the little baby growing bigger every day.

☆ Small bonus, but imaging enforcer Grayon coming home to her pregnant partner, very housewife scenario aaa 🩷🩷

[leashybebes]

fic: blue and gold (14/28)

today's @bucktommyfluffebruary prompt, fittingly, is valentine's day. my fill is here

not me getting my valentine's is a scam agenda all over a fluff prompt. come back, come back, i promise it's still sweet! there's even a hint of spice at the end. tumblr version below.

At the other end of the couch, Tommy looks comfortable in Buck's space, relaxed in a way Buck's only now realizing was unfamiliar to him on their first go around. He doesn't want to rock the boat, but a question has been gnawing at him. He snags the remote and pauses the documentary that's playing on the TV, causing Tommy to look at him questioningly.

"What do you think of Valentine's day?" Buck asks.

Tommy frowns. "I think February was months ago."

When we were still broken up, he doesn't say, and Buck feels fond. They've talked it out so thoroughly, but he knows Tommy still feels bad about it, no matter how many times Buck promises him he doesn't have to.

"Yeah, yeah, okay," he says. "I mean, the concept."

"Oh, the concept," Tommy says with a grin. "I don't know. What do you think of it?"

"Uh-uh, no uno-reverso, I asked first."

"I thought you said mutual self-disclosure was key."

Buck rolls his eyes, climbing into Tommy's lap and kissing him. Tommy's hands settle onto his waist, his eyes darkening. Never let it be said Buck doesn't know how to get what he wants from his man.

"I did say that. I also…" He pauses to drop another kiss onto Tommy's mouth, quick and brief as a blink. "...asked first."

"Okay, okay," Tommy says, his fingers curling into Buck's shirt. He pauses, considering. "The rom-com fan in me wants to like it."

"But…?"

Tommy slumps a little so they fit closer together, fiddles with the seam of Buck's sleeve.

"My dad got my mom flowers every Valentine's."

"Ah," Buck says.

"Mm-hm. Every anniversary, too. He was an asshole the rest of the year, but it's like he checked that box in his mind. 'I have done my relationship duty according to the Hallmark overlords'."

Buck scratches his fingers through the short hairs at Tommy's nape. "You love Hallmark."

"I do," Tommy admits easily. "But it's not real life. I always used to tell myself…" He trails off and tugs on one of Buck's belt loops.

"What?"

"That if I found someone to love, I'd love them all year round. Treat them right all year round."

"You do," Buck says, leaning down to kiss Tommy again, firmer this time, lingering. "You're so good to me."

Buck feels Tommy melt, tastes the sigh that escapes him.

"Yeah?" Tommy asks, like he's checking. "I'm - I'm good for you?"

Buck's ears perk up at the tone and he gives a gentle tug where he still has his hand in Tommy's hair. Sure enough, the sound Tommy makes is almost a groan this time.

"So good. Do you - " Buck swallows, presses a kiss to Tommy's cheek. They've played around with this dynamic a little more since they got back together, but it still makes Buck's head spin. "Do you want me to show you how good you are for me?"

Tommy nods, firm, breathless, and Buck grins, pulling him in for another kiss.

[m1ssu2p1an0]

OMG HELLO!!! I have a request...

you dont have to do this if you dont want to! but basically, can you do PLATONIC awakened pure vanilla cookie comforting anxious/quiet!reader?

Things have been tough and honeslty I think we all need to cry into his arms and be comforted by him </3 fatherly pv hugs would be so soothing and could make anyone feel better,,,

Of course I can, my friend! I truly hope you feel better, we all love PV around here (Because gender isn’t specified, reader will be GN!) But I hope you enjoy it, and hope you feel better as well, only wish the best for you! <3

“I am here..”

Awakened PV & GN!Anxious/Quiet reader

To say you didn’t feel great was an utter understatement. It’s like you fallen ill. Ever since arriving to the kingdom, it’s like you couldn’t help but have sickening thoughts cloud your senses. The mere feeling that someone’s watching you and judging your every move gets so draining, even tiring.

Your behavior slipped past many as you just adjusting to everything around you and what’s ahead for you in the following days, but your actions didn’t seem to go unnoticed by the sweet cookie that had nothing but worries for you.

You were sat at a bench, looking into the water, sub-cautiously looking around as you let out a small huff that could pass as a sigh. The previously mentioned cookie had approached you unknowingly as it took you a bit to notice him. Looking to your left you see him facing what was ahead before turning to look at you, noticing your tensed posture and anxious actions.

“Well hello, my dear. I apologize for startling you, it truly wasn’t my intention..”

His voice was smooth like butter as it seemed to ease your worries a tad, your mind racing as you began to overthink before you were interrupted by his voice once more.

“What seems to be the matter? You always seem so.. scared.. is there anything wrong?”

His question overwhelmed you, causing you to cower away slightly, saying nothing. It was like there was a lump stuck in your throat, no matter what you did you couldn’t seem to escape it. You watched as he eased up, as if he was shrinking himself to look less intimidating, the bright light that seemed to emit from him dimming. Yet the warm feeling from it was still very evident. Your mouth opened but no words, causing you to hesitate as you shook your head.

“I really don’t try to pester, but just know I’ll be here as a shoulder to lean on, and even cry upon..”

Those simple words made your chest clench, your hand coming up to grasp right over your heart. It was pretty cheesy, yet nobody has ever tried to even attempt to ask if anything was wrong. But that was probably due to you being like a turtle in a shell. You’re always clammed up, too afraid to say or do something wrong. Just thinking about it brought you to tears as they slowly fell down. The sight caused him to worry, hesitantly getting closer, unsure if you were okay with it. But not seeing you move away, and instead lean in was practically a green light for him.

He placed his staff down, hands going up to, very carefully, hold you in his arms. His fingers ran through your hair in a soothing way as you softly mumbled small things, about how you felt, your worries, your fears. It was all too warm, like a parent’s hug after you fell and hurt your knee. It only made tears fall quicker.

“It’s okay, my child.. I’m right here..”

Small hiccups left your lips as your hold tightened around the king, his hold unwavering as well.

“There’s nothing to worry about, you’re safe here.. you are a blessed child of light, never let worries drag you to your lowest. Trust me, my child, I’ve been there before.. Now, when you’re ready to continue talking about how you feel, I’ll be here still. I’ll wait for you.”

I apologize if this was too short, or it wasn’t amazing :’(

I attempted to do it within the reach of my abilities, but I hope you still enjoyed it! I’ll never stop repeating this, but you are loved, nothing on earth will change that. There’s always someone who loves you, even when you don't realize it. You are infinite <3

[luzyuvu]

Amphoreus worse romcom. Ch 1.

Thinking about Anaxa.

First time writing in a long time! Also I did this because I couldn't sleep, tell me if is trash, thank you and maybe should I do a part 2?

------------------------

Everyone knows how Anaxa is. Logical, calculative, rational.

Just even thinking about it is redundant. Extremely. Maybe to an offensive extent. And you know it, he knows you do, and even if you didn't he would still treat you like anybody else. Because you are. A random girl that somehow and some way got involved with the Chrysos heirs, by mere chance, luck, or like you like to call it, destiny.

One thing let to another and you two regularly talk, mostly because of how people use you as a messenger when it comes to tell things to Anaxa. You are easy going, quiet, and don't get offended easily. Or at least, you don't seem to show it when it comes to him. Silently dealing with his judging gazes and all the list of reasons why people don't like him in the first place.

You don't mind. Well, maybe you do. It's not like you liked having to deal with someone like him, but you felt bad for the people who asked you to talk with him for them, so you would do them the favor.

After so many times and talks, you tried to get closer. Key word, tried, but it always ends with uncomfortable silences, cold words, emotionless or in best case, judgmental gazes... It's not like you didn't try, you did. Kind words, patience, even trying to crack a joke, but after you tried the latter a few times, only to receive the most awkward silence you ever had, you gave up. It's not like you wanted to, but you weren't dumb. You can't beg someone to befriend you, you just can't. That's why, if Anaxa doesn't like you, you won't push it any further. There's more people in the world, after all.

Anaxa didn't think much about, too focused on his own research and problems. Something someone like you couldn't understand, so he thought.

You don't know how much you treasure something until you lose it, typical, so typical he wants to puke.

He doesn't mind when you start to slowly make more distance, somehow even more than there already was, he tells himself. He curses the humanity on his heart, and he also curses the destiny for making him feel this way.

It's so cliche, so, so cliche it feels disgusting. Is this the karma for all the times he dissmised this kind of behavior? For how brutally he rejected this part of himself and everybody else? He doesn't believe in karma, but this is what comes to his mind right now.

He doesn't understand why he feels this way, and the more he thinks about it, the more reasons pop up of why he does feel this way. Much to his disgust.

Was the way you looked at him? With so much patience and kindness even with his sharp tone and glares?

Maybe how much he got used to you after seeing you over and over for such a long time? The possibilities are endless, and the more he finds, the more he gets angry at himself.

Soon enough, his mind start to wonder, and he thinks of the endless ways he could lose you.

You are a hopeless romantic, he knows it, it's probably one if the first things he noticed. How you daydream about finding the perfect husband, about a romance out of the most cheesiest fairytales that could ever be made, how you fell in love with this fictional characters, dreaming about how happy would you be with them, about finding your knight in shining armor, how you seem to have a new crush every now and then...

It makes him feel sick. Because as soon as he thinks about it, his mind starts to wander.

Aglaea is out of the list of people you would date. She is your idol, your goddess. The way you look at her reminds him of a young child looking at their hero, their patents. With so much admiration and care, as if they were the most perfect and incredible person in the world.

You had looked at him with admiration in your eyes, but it never matched the way you did when it came to her. And it makes his fists clench.

Castorice is out too, she is your best friend, your sworn sister. So much, people often find themselves mistaking you for real sisters. Even when you don't share blood or the same physical features like biological ones do, the bond you have and the way you know each other is undeniable. You even sew, with Aglaea's help, clothes and another accessories to match her in special occasions, or maybe when you feel like. You even have a matching bracelet that you never take off. The only day you lost it, he never saw you sadder, and when you found it, he never saw you happier.

He is not as special as Castorice is to you, not even remotely, will he ever be?

Phainon... He is a particular case. He is kind and the perfect man, in the eyes of the people. The man of your dreams. Only thinking it makes him sick. But he has a lot secrets behind his kind and charming smile. Things no one knows, hiding his own loneliness and revenge. He doesn't think Phainon has in mind love and relationships right now, or if he is willing to expose the secrets he so much dearly keeps to himself.

Anaxa feels relief.

But then... Mydei. He is probably the one you'd least be into a relationship... at first glance. He doesn't have the most approachable personality, and is in general more grumpy and angry than Anaxa. But, he has something Anaxa doesn't, a softer side that can be seen if you reed between the lines and pay enough attention. Something Anaxagoras never showed you, something your sharp eye could notice, and you definitely did.

That's why you were closer to Mydei than you were with him. You are not best friends like you are with Castorice, don't see him as a god like you did with Aglaea, nor appreciate him the way you do with Phainon, but you are in good terms. Anaxa also knows that his softer side defenetly gained a special spot in your heart.

He also noticed the sneaky glances, according to you, that you couldn't help but give Mydei. Sometimes to his chest, others to his arms and others to his back. You were at least a little attracted to him, it was obvious. But now is when Anaxa cares.

You were also aware that he trained kids, and that he had a sweet tooth, it makes you more drawn to him that you ever were to Anaxa, and now, he never felt more jealous.

As he thought about it, his mind started to think more and more about you and Mydei.

It would certainly be difficult and a slow burn but, what if Mydei developed feelings for you? What if you also had a crush on him? The scenario starts to develop.

Out of the two of you, Mydei would h ave to do the first move, you are shy, and probably wouldn't notice Mydei's affection. In this hypothetical case, unless Mydei properly decided to court you. Then, it would be over.

He can see it so clearly, the two of you, slowly getting closer and closer. How even with Mydei's straightforward nature, he would definitely conquer your heart, like he did many battles. How he could hold your smaller frame so easily, how you would burry your face in the chest you already like so much, hearing his heartbeat, looking for comfort in his warmth. How even if he is a warrior, he would hold you with such tenderness, look at you with so much passion. His love would definitely out burn the sun, and consume you until yours burn as bright as his.

You would be his queen, and him, your king and world.

He doesn't know what love is, but he knows what it's heartbreak.

He thinks of another possibility, and then, his thoughts go back to Phainon.

If you somehow got Phainon to open up, and he decided to be genuine with you... As he thinks about it, Anaxa notices, if thinking about you and Mydei was a slow torture, like a knife in his stomach, slowly sinking in and twisting as he gets more and more immersed, then, thinking about you and Phainon it's like and entire mountain fell over him.

The thought disgusts him.

At least, Mydei is kind of like him, and the possibilities of him falling in love with you and actually doing something are low, so low it makes Anaxa feel better, but if Phainon were to do so... By the time Anaxa tried to reach you, you'd already be in Phainon's arms, whispering sweet nothings into each other's ears and kissing in a way only in dreams could ever happen.

He is helpless.

Phainon is perfect, so perfect it's insulting. He got everything, the appearance, the personality... All Anaxa doesn't have, all that you love and ever could dream of. He is a knight in shining armor, a prince, a golden retriever kind of guy, he can't compare.

You'd be so perfect for each other, like a match made in heaven. You are so sweet, so caring, yet with a little twist of sassynes and dark humor. If you ended together, he knows people would think how lucky you would be for being with Phainon, Okhema's hero. But all Anaxa can think is how lucky Phainon would be for being the one who has you, and it offends him how people wouldn't see it, even if it's in front of their faces.

He can even picture a wedding, how beautiful you'd be, in a dress made by Aglaea herself, with Castorice as your maid of honor and Tribios giving you your rings.

He wouldn't even bother to attend it, as much as he doesn't even bother to imagine how Phainon would propose you, it would be as disgustingly sweet as this what if wedding he is imaging right now. And if somehow someone, Aglaea, got him to go to the wedding, he would be sitting in the very end, watching with a gaze that could kill, never leaving Phainon's frame.

He wishes his mind stopped there, but he imagined how he could lose you to every one else and every single person in Okhema, because love is a war where everyone is your enemy.

-------

Phainon noticed how someone was watching him, it was not like the usual gazes he receives when he is walking around or saving someone. No. This one is deadly, and sinister in a way that makes his whole body shiver. He wonders if he did anything to get Anaxa so angry, he never saw him this way, not even with the people he despises. But he chooses to ignore it, even when your happy face can't eliminate completely the hole that Anaxa's eye is leaving on the back of his head.

-------

Mydei has to resist the urge to comfort Anaxa right there and then. It's getting annoying, but he knows you don't like fights and that you'd rather not have to interact with Anaxa if not needed, at least recently. He respects your decision, not asking why or if anything happened between you two. Instead, he just rolls his eyes and enjoys the sweets you baked. It was a new recipe you were trying and you thought he was a good test subject, it's not like he was going to die or get sick if it was bad anyway.

--------

Aglaea is aware of the way Anaxa is behaving, it's painfully obvious, at least for someone with the Titan of romance's coreflame. Besides, the others already told her that Anaxa was acting weird and his sharp gazes were more deadly than usual, specially since you started recently to avoid favors to talk to him in behalf of other people.

Maybe he could use a little of help to conquer his beloved, even if he wouldn't admit it.

-------

Anaxa is not having it.

It's not like he is surprised that Aglaea herself noticed, he would actually be surprised if she didn't. But at the same time, he doesn't like when people get into his business, especially as personal as... Whatever is this.

He reluctantly listens to her, he still hates the idea of help or even recognize his problem, even in his mind, but he can't help to be slightly curious. He curses his curiosity.

Aglaea really cares about you, more than he thought. It kind of annoys him. She cares so much, that knowing your dream is to get married and have a family, besides your own carrier, of course, she personally would help out into getting the relationship you so much desire.

You are so shy and coward, and also, so oblivious, most people would give up trying to court you. And that gives him relief. A part of himself wants you to stay single for him. And realizing this makes him want to shoot himself with his gun. If he doesn't have you, it's fine, as long as no one else does.

He is possessive, he is jealous and selfish. You don't want a lover to own you, you want one to take care of you and cherish you. It makes him feel guilty of his own feelings, he notices. He feels stupid, he doesn't know if it's because of having the feeling in the first place, or because how much he cares about you in this moment.

Love is stupid.

He just admitted he loves you for the first time.

He never felt dummer.

At half of Aglaea's speech his mind starts to wander again.

In the hypothetical case you could fall in love with Aglaea and she was also in love with you, he doesn't know if it would be worse than trying to fight with Phainon for your affection.

She is mature, elegant and romantic, she has the coreflame of romance for a reason. He imagines, she would make you fell in love with her in such a perfect way, it would be slow, caring and breathtaking, such as herself. He stops himself halfway through, thinking of how superior she would be compared to him in terms of courting you it's humiliating and it feels pathetic.

And she notices his jealousy and tries to talk about it.

Even Castorice crosses his mind as they speak, and thinking of how pure your love for each other already is without being it romantic makes it even worse thinking how much you'd love each other if you were lovers.

So, he decides to indulge Aglaea. Because he wants to love you, and make you love him. And if for that he has to change and follow Aglaea's guidance to gain your heart so it be.

Even though he cringes a little of how cheesy it sounded on his head.

[eddiegettingshot]

genuinely can i ask why you're so against people viewing eddie through a woman coded lense and finding it interesting to compare his own experiences traits and storylines with other female chracters? seeing as you yourself speak frequently about your headcanon for how much "buck diaz" wants to be eddie's submissive housewife who grows a magic womb and gives him tons of miracle babies or whatever and a lot of people use buck liking cooking/ wanting children/being emotional as evidence for this (which what the hell, sure) id thought you'd be open to the feminization of eddie the same way so many people for years have been feminizing buck. the only difference between the two is i see buck feminized more with sexual connotations while eddie's feminization comes from a more societal and familial analysis i think which don't get me wrong both have their heteronormative moments (single parent (which like it or not is most often applied to female characters)/eldest "daughter" parentification/denying himself what he wants etc are the arguments i most see for eddie) not trying to start a fight i just am curious about why you feel one's ok and not the other cause gotta be honest your vehement reaction to this kinda gave me a bad taste in my mouth considering how passionate you are about your headcanon of eddie being this macho dom top which im sure some people also feel is a gross mischaracterization as strongly as you feel about this like,, long story short i guess im just saying let people enjoy things! lol

i think woman coded is stupid as an actual character/tv analysis 😭😭 if someone said buck was woman coded id fucking laugh too because it’s not actually a useful way to analyze his character whatsoever and genuinely have you ever seen me make this claim in earnest for buck? because i don’t do that, ESPECIALLY not citing the reasons you included here, and i also don’t write him as a submissive housewife in my serious creative work.

as you pointed out yourself for eddie it comes from “societal”/“family” which to me feels obnoxious because the ENTIRE point of eddie’s character and specifically his relationship to fatherhood is that he is a man who’s raising his son in a way that he wasn’t allowed from his own father. people yell so much about eddie’s toxic masculinity or his relationship to masculinity or whatever but in the face of choices he makes/ways he behaves that are in active opposition to those kinds of ideals the response is ��ok so this means he’s being coded as a woman” … not to mention the flip side of this seems to be a way of looking at SHANNON that’s patently ridiculous considering that her entire story (what we have been allowed of it) is specifically tied up in motherhood, her feelings of failing as a mother, etc. viewing these canon storylines in this way and making claims about these characters like that is patently different from a widespread half-joke about how getting struck by lightning made buck impregnable… i’m sure you see that?

and suggesting that i think eddie is a macho dom top is like actually kind of hilarious considering literally the one thing i’m always talking about is how he ISNT macho 😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭 at every turn i am on this blog arguing about how this man is emotional and vulnerable and goofy while the fandom at large insists that he’s not. i’m sorry like. hello?? i also outright said i don’t care about being progressive, i didn’t say anything was problematic, i just think this is an obnoxious and hilarious way to intellectually look at things (and deeply transparent but i digress).

[deesseshesca]

PAC: What would your broken heart feel about your nuptial union ? (18+)

PILE 3 

SONG : Georgia on My mind - Ray Charles

2 wands, World, 3 cups (reverse), Emperor (reverse) 

Y’all ate your 12 red grapes under the table this year. 

The reading is you take down your wedding day hairstyle while your husband is setting up the room (whatever that means …) and you look at the mirror, there's a flash of your older self. 

(You are caressing your wedding ring.) 

I was pissed when they brought him back into my life again. When I ate the 12 red grapes we had just broken up … I know I am the one who decided to end things because I could not handle the purity of his love. Yes I know it was probably a very bitchy move to eat the grape under the table but I thought that maybe with someone else I would be able to open my heart more easily. I was so scared to break him. I’ve been broken so many times before. I did not want to be the reason that turn him into an helpless in love like the loser that I am. Maybe it is the red string theory or maybe it is the karma because I try to play in the Universe face but here I am proudly married to my first and last love. Is all thanks to him. He came back into my life, while I was starting to date around (tears of disappointment are making their way on your cheeks. You are so disappointed that you almost fall into an old cycle because you could not handle the goodness of his love) again. Can’t believe  I told him to wait his turn. Can't believe I told him that he was not  the only one. Can't believe I told him that it will pass. People always love me before I become too much and other times I destroy it  myself before it can destroy me. In all seriousness, I think I first ran away because I was scared of the pain that was going to come when it would all fell apart, like it usually does. How fucked of me to think so lowly of our union at first ? My sweet boy used to text me when drunk just to tell me how much loved me. How much he loved my brown skin, my curly hair and my curves and if he could he would ditch his boys and come hug me or just stare at me but he knows I need space and space is essential in a relationship. My sweet boy would ask anybody walking our way to take a picture of both of us so that if anything happens to him, he will not just remember to love me, but seeing both of us will show us how deeply he cared for me. My sweet boy has a parent with dementia which scar him, so he can't seem to go a day without writing me a letter, taking a picture or telling me ‘’I love u’’ . His words : ‘’ I will never forget to love you. You hear me ( your name), I will  forget how to breathe before I forget you’’. My sensitive baby is always so emotional. Never afraid of letting the tears flow. Always expressing to anyone who wants to hear him how much he loves me even when  the conversation has nothing to do with me ( ME: lol). It was so hard to make my way back into his family and friend group which I understood when I saw him again. He lost weight, he had such huge under eye bags and yet he called my name with much sweetness. I heard from  the grapevine, he drank so much more trying to make it hurt less and his friend would hide his phone because he would try to text me and call me. Which would end up with him sobbing (not u trying to keep it in… Is ok baby …). One day, I allowed him back. He asks for a hug, pleads for it,  promising that after that he would forever leave me alone. If that's what I wanted. I hugged him, cried, he cried, holding on strongly to me while comforting me and I promise myself to never ever let go again. 

(HIM: BABE … BABE … you can come out … I have a surprise for you. You can't answer because you are still crying and you don't want him to worry. HIM : (he knocks) Babe are u ok ? Can I enter ? Talk to me … baby ..; You open the door mascara running) 

Couple days before you let him see you again, you're going to make out with another boy. Claiming you are ready for something new. When the boy will try to make a move on your inner thigh, you will panic. I even think that you will kiss him, a loud voice in your mind will remind you how wrong it is. Also you are an amazing kisser but babe this is a very poor performance … I feel bad for the dude making out with you. Too much lips (is that even possible) and too much tongue. 

Your future husband loves kissing your whole body as a form of foreplay. Love caressing you, always checking up on you while sharing the intimate moment with you. Even when his inside you and your eyes are close, he makes sure that you feel good. He always checks your mannerism to make sure he isn't hurting you. Y’all dirty talking is more like love making affirmation. Is it not dirty or degrading, still very sexy but is more emotional than vulgar. 

Y’all were raised in different ways. You both have similar financial background but different parenthood. When I channel him, everything around him is orange and yellow. I can clearly see his friend and I can feel the love of his parents. There's a warmth that radiates from him. Also he grew up seeing his parents very much in love. The fact that their love survives the illness of one of them is like an ultimate confirmation that he wants the same for himself. He always wanted marriage, the house, kids and dogs, let's not forget the close group of friends. It will not surprise me if in one of his graduation speeches he commented, only really caring  about finding a wife. On your side is a light cold blue. Maybe your childhood bedroom was painted blue. The house is cold, so you may enjoy staying by yourself. Side note : U is very pretty. I know you may be tired of hearing that but babe your beauty is too strong for me to just move on. Actually for anyone to move on. Anyways back on track, your parents were never home busy with their career. Like you grew up on your own, no noise, lonely silence. Still very financially stable. Is not like they're working to keep a roof over your head. I think they told you multiple times in some way shape or form  that their career is more important than you. 

[nakylvr]

— ALL THE THINGS I NEVER SAID

sophia laforteza x fem!reader

summary જ⁀➴ you've had a crush on sophia for a while now. on the week before valentine's day you write a letter confessing your love to her, but hide it away. until one of your friends finds it and gives it to her on valentine's day without you knowing.

warnings/tags જ⁀➴ fluff, college!au, mild language

wc જ⁀➴ 2,4 k

you were a person with a lot of thoughts. a lot of words left unsaid because they weren't important or you didn't have the confidence to say it out loud. you were quiet, you didn't have a big group of friends, but you had the ones that counted. you weren't exactly seen in classes unless you answered a question and then the moment would pass and you would be forgotten again. but, you didn't mind it a whole lot.

valentines day was one of the most obnoxious days in the year. at school, at least. you thought once high school was over that it would tone down but no, it got worse if anything. you’d have to sit through multiple classes of boyfriends coming in and asking their girlfriends out on dates, you’d have to deal with girls giggling about what their boyfriends did for them for the holiday, shit, you even had to sit through your roommate being serenaded by her girlfriend first thing this morning. you weren't big on the holiday. what was the point if you didn't have someone to celebrate it with?

and as much as you would hate to admit it, you hated missing out.

-ˋˏ✄┈┈┈┈

you didn’t have crushes on a lot of people. a few here and there throughout the years, but none of them went farther than admiring from afar. you never confessed, too afraid of it backfiring and ending in a mess. and it was the same this year.

sophia laforteza, aka the girl so far out of your league that you would rather die than admit your feelings for the girl. you had spoken to her a few times with you being in technical theatre and her being the star of all the musicals and plays alike, and you ended up falling for her. her warm smile, her sweet voice, her beautiful eyes. it was hard not to. especially once you saw just how many people were pining for her.

you walked into the theatre with your binder in your arms filled with all the things you needed to get finished before rehearsal for “romeo and juliet”. could you guess who juliet was? pretty easy. but it still surprised you when you saw sophia sitting on the edge of the stage looking at papers in her hands as the door shut loudly behind you.

sophia’s head perks up upon hearing the door close, and a smile grows on her face at the sight of you. “sorry, i didn't think anyone would be coming in this period,” she says apologetically.

you could feel your heart skip a beat just at the sight of her smile towards you, feeling your anxiety creeping up the closer you approached the stage clutching the binder in your hands like a lifeline. “oh, it's okay!” you assure quickly, shaking your head. “i’m usually in here during free periods when a show is coming up. there's a lot to get situated.”

“i’m sure.” sophia nods, setting the papers down next to her and crossing her leg over the other. “you do a lot of work in tech, don't you?” she asks, tilting her head to the side.

“uh, well, i guess you could say that,” you respond shyly with a short nod. this was the longest you've held a conversation with sophia without one of you being dragged off, and you didn't know what to do. “but, i mean, you do a lot too. i’m sure memorizing all the lines and stuff is hard.”

sophia just shrugs her shoulders lightly. “i guess, but it's nothing technical, literally, like you do. i may be the one on stage, but you're the one who lights me up.” she smiles at you, not a hint of hesitation in her voice as she talks.

“well when you put it that way…” you mumble, glancing down at the ground. your face is heating up the longer you feel her gaze on you, your heart practically beating out of your chest. when you finally meet her eyes again, you quickly look away again. “i uh i need to get some things done before rehearsal today so uhm, yeah,” you manage to say. “you can stay though! or do whatever it was you were doing! i don't mind!” you quickly add, not wanting her to think you were kicking her out.

the giggle that comes from sophia makes your face turn redder than it already was as she smiles at you. “if you don't mind me talking to myself repeating the same lines over and over again, i’ll stay.”

“i don't.” you shake your head, shifting your weight from one foot to the other.

a moment of silence fills the large theatre before you clear your throat and make your way to behind the stage, scurrying off like a scared cat having a showdown with another. once you were behind the stage and sophia was out of your line of sight, you let out a sigh of relief as you set your binder down on the table with a thud. running a hand through your hair, you started to get things ready.

you heard a few people talking about thirty minutes into you doing your work, leaving you confused as you overheard a few things. but, you tried not to think of it too much. that was, until a ginger-haired girl crashed into the back room, literally.

“megan! jesus christ!”

you stare at the scene in front of you, wires in your hands that you were trying to set up for the lighting as sophia rushes in after the ginger.

“holy crap! there's all this shit back here?”

“megan!” sophia grabs megan by her arm, yanking her up off the ground before her eyes land on you. “i’m sorry! my friends wanted to help with my lines. i told them not to come back here.” she shoots a look at megan who puts her palms together.

“i’m sorry! please don't kill me, pretty theatre tech lady!” megan apologizes immediately.

“what?” you let out in surprise, your face turning red.

“it's her words, not mine!” megan continues.

“and we're leaving!” sophia smiles, but her eyes are wide with an emotion you couldn't recognize as she then drags megan back out onto the stage.

what the fuck was that. you stand there frozen for a few minutes trying to process what just happened, hearing the faint voices assumingly yelling from you being able to distinguish a few of the voices. shaking your head, you quickly finish what you were doing before going to your bag.

searching through your bag, your eyes widen when you realize something is missing.

every time you had a crush, you wrote a letter. it was the easiest way to express everything you were feeling rather than mess it up by not knowing what to say at the moment. you poured your heart out into every one you wrote, and it was only a few.

so when the letter you had in your bag is now gone, you obviously were going to freak out.

“shit, shit, shit,” you curse, pulling items out of your bag to see if it was at the bottom or in another part of it only to find it nowhere. “oh my god…” you mumble quietly.

and then, you remembered something. your best friend, danielle, had asked to look in your bag for a spare piece of paper, and you were too busy doing something else that you didn't even notice she never took paper. she probably took the letter.

grabbing your phone you call her, waiting a minute until she picks up.

“yn? what's up?”

“did you take the fucking letter?” you angrily ask quietly.

“what letter?”

“don't even right now!” you try to keep yourself from yelling, knowing that sophia and her friends were still out there. “did you take it?”

“maybe. you needed a push! i’m that push! i’ll give it to her after rehearsal. i know you signed it so it won't be weird.”

“oh my god, danielle, what the fuck?” you sigh dramatically. “this is insane!”

“no, it's me being an amazing friend and getting you a girlfriend!”

“it's not going to work! it never does!” you say, your voice getting louder without noticing.

“because you don't try! trust me, this will work.”

you didn't even respond, just hanging up instead and setting your phone down. letting out a loud sigh, you put your face in your hands.

“i’m doomed.”

-ˋˏ✄┈┈┈┈

rehearsal went well. or, you assumed it did, seeing as no one texted you saying things were going wrong. you couldn't even show up. not when you knew danielle would give sophia your note at the end of the day.

you sat at the bleachers of the field, looking at your phone with your headphones on, not paying attention to anything else around you. you tried to keep your mind off what was probably going to go down tomorrow. word will probably go around, you’ll end up rejected, and you’ll move schools as a result. you knew it was a dumb idea to write the letter in the first place, but to be fair, you were never going to give it to her! it just had to be danielle to take matters into her own hands. for your sake. little did you know just what had happened after the rehearsal, or how the day would finish.

feeling a light tap on your shoulder, you jump, turning your head and sliding your headphones off to see sophia standing there, making your heart drop to your stomach.

“oh, h-hey!” you mentally curse at yourself for stuttering right off the bat.

“you weren't at rehearsal today,” sophia says, sitting down next to you.

“yeah, i got caught up in some stuff,” you lie, looking away from her.

“not because of the letter?” she asks.

your heart is beating so fast you think you're going to pass out in a minute or the next at her question. you don't even know if you're breathing at this point. you can't even think of how to respond.

sophia hesitantly reaches her hand towards yours, gently grabbing ahold of it, causing you to slowly look at her and see the small smile on her face.

“you didn't want danielle to give it to me, did you?”

“no,” you whisper, shaking your head. “i-i didn't want you to have it anyway.”

“why?” her expression turns confused, eyebrows furrowed together.

“because i knew you wouldn't like me too,” you mumble quietly.

“you thought i don't?” sophia asks you, her eyes softening once realizing you were serious.

“i mean, yeah.” your voice gets quieter. “i thought you didn't even know i existed until this play.”

sophia hums and nods her head. “i guess i was pretty bad about it at first. but i saw how much work you put into phantom that i kept trying to get a part even if i didn't really want it. i just wanted to see you, even if i was just awkwardly staring from afar and messing up my lines multiple times,” she admits, letting out a short laugh. “i read your letter, and i thought it was really sweet. you have a way with words, y’know. and i’m glad danielle gave it to me, because it made this whole thing a lot easier. i really like you, yn.”

“what?” you accidentally say. to say you're shocked would be an understatement, because you weren't even believing the words that left sophia’s mouth. “are you serious?” you question.

“yeah,” she answers with a nod.

there's a short silence then, as you try to come up with what to say. you couldn't find any words. thankfully for you, sophia speaks up.

“can i kiss you?”

your eyes widen subtly in surprise, and you ultimately nod your head, not trusting your voice. sophia’s other hand cups your jaw as she slowly leans in before softly pressing her lips against yours. the kiss is slow, almost hesitant with both of you not wanting to push it too much, and when she pulls back, her smile is wide and she giggles at the dazed expression on your face.

“you're so cute,” she says fondly, her thumb wiping off a bit of the lip gloss that transferred from her lips to yours. “are you doing anything tonight?”

“no.” you shake your head.

“then be ready by six, and wear something nice,” she tells you, her smile widening. “i’ll be waiting outside your dorm.”

“how do you know where my dorm is?” you ask, looking at her confused.

“your roommate kazuha is my friend daniela’s girlfriend. i was told how irritated you looked when she and megan showed up this morning," sophia answers.

“oh my god.” you shake your head. “okay well, i’ll make sure to be ready.” you smile at her.

“good, cause i don't want to be waiting outside in the hallway all night.” sophia stands up, still holding onto your hand. “you don't mind if i keep the letter, do you?”

“huh?” you look up at her. “uh, no. why would you want to keep it, though?” you ask.

“like i said, it was really sweet. i want to remember it,” she answers like it was nothing. “promise you’ll meet me at six?”

“yeah, i promise.” you nod, trying to ignore her answer to your question. “as long as you don't kidnap me.”

“you think that low of me?” sophia gasps dramatically, acting hurt. “all i’m doing is taking you to a nice dinner, nothing more! unless you want to–”

“okay!” you cut her off, laughing. “i’ll be ready, i swear.”

“you better.” sophia leans down, kissing your cheek. “i’m really glad today turned out this way.”

“me too,” you respond quietly.

“i’ll see you later, pretty.” sophia smiles, pecking your lips before walking away.

watching her walk away, you let out a breath you didn't know you were holding, missing the warmth from her lips on yours and her hand holding yours. your phone buzzes in your pocket, and when you take it out you shake your head. “loser,” you mumble under your breath reading what danielle sent you.

you hated to admit it, but you were happy with how things went today, even if it wasn't how you originally planned it to be. it went better than you expected, and you were thankful for that. even if it was because your best friend stole your letter and gave it out. but you would never say that out loud.

[coldlovehotblood]

Heyyy, i LOVED your writing so if possible, could you write a Izzy x rockstar! reader where the reader is the frontwoman of an all girl band, and she's like, a femme fatale yk those vibes

Izzy/ gnr and her/ her band have know each other for about 1 year, but these two are like, OBSSESSED with each other so so in love but they prefer to just keep flirting subtly and blah blah blah until in her birthday, they have their first time (finally)

Ma'am I'M BEGGING for some filthy eye rolling juicy smut (only if you're comfortable ofc) and some fluff to keep the balance hihi 🧘‍♀️

˗ˏˋ✩ˎˊ˗

PRETTY TIED UP (p.1)

the persona you’d created as front woman of a major band comes crashing down. strong liquor paired with your hungry heart lead you to places you thought never possible: the other side of your crushes bed.

w/c: 3,205

warnings: steven is a little shit, alcohol consumption

a/n: so umm.. *gulps* hello anon from december! this spiralled completely out of control and somehow ended up so big it needs to be split into two parts. life, writers block and working on too many things at once have all been eating at me. sorry for the wait. i hope it was worth it😇 big thank you to @rocknrolldecadence for being a star as always

dividers by @/strangergraphics

Your manager threw open the door and launched a folded magazine at you with a growl.

“When will you lot be done with this heartthrob bullshit?! You know, I can’t clean up for your asses forever.”

You grimaced as he paced (read: stomped) back and forth by the doorway of the dressing room your group had been given. It felt as if someone was chipping at your skull with a chisel, and the addition of your manager’s huffing and puffing wasn't helping to ease the harsh thump between your temples. 

The poor makeup artist's hand started to tremble slightly above your bandmate's brow at the sight of the man’s agitation. You couldn't really blame them. He was intimidating. It took years to become used to seeing how easily he flew off the handle, and a couple more to realise that it was all in good faith. He was tall and brawny, made of sharp edges and biting words, seemingly built for battle and not spitting through phone receivers for the majority of the day. There was this eternal furrow to his brow that made him look as if he was glaring at every person he met, and honestly, he probably was.

“Quit your whining. You read the job description years ago.”

“Yeah, well nowhere did it say ‘convincing the media every story they catch wind of is fake news’ would be on the daily agenda.”

Your drummer groaned and reached to grab a water bottle from the floor, voice snarky as she commented, “Read the fine print next time, then.”

“You shut up,” he snarled through his teeth, jabbing a finger in her direction as she rolled her eyes, “because I'm not just talking to miss centre stage here. All of you need to be a bit more careful about where you show your faces and who you hang around. I’m only after seeing this headline, and I swear to God, if even one word of it is true, I am disbanding you.”

“Sure you will,” you yawned, reaching for the magazine that had landed beside you.

'ROMANCING ROCK STARS REUNITE: Pour Femme members photographed once again sharing drinks with rock and roll powerhouse Guns n’ Roses, further feeding fan theories of unspoken courtship. Read more on page 5!'

“Ooh, what have they said about us this time?” your bass player wiggled a bit in excitement from the other side of the sofa, “Did they get my good side?”

You flicked through to page five and turned it in her direction. Some other members craned their necks to have a peek too.

“See, this is why I don't mind that magazine. I look great—”

“It doesn't matter how you look! It's your other image I'm worried—” he sharply exhaled, pinching his nose bridge to centre himself before continuing, “What I'm getting at is that we've been through why you shouldn't be seen with some other artists in public, especially those guys. If you had even an ounce of common sense, you wouldn’t have to put up with me giving you an earful every minute!”

You gazed down at the spread. Your bandmate was right, she looked amazing. You all did in the low light of the Whisky A Go Go, smiling and laughing. Your lead guitarist was leaning over the table to pour another round of whiskey into everyone's glasses, beaming wide at something, if you remembered correctly, Duff had said. Slash was leaning in towards your drummer’s ear, probably shouting over the electric buzz of screaming people and loud live music. It had been a good night out. You smiled, recalling the trek home being full of cheers and laughter.

That smile dropped as soon as you spied yourself. Your glass was raised to your lips, eyes cast to the other end of the table. No, towards Izzy Stradlin.

In the previous year, you and your band met Guns n’ Roses at an award show. The interaction caught the eye of the public, as you couldn't turn the radio on without hearing the gritty drone of electric guitar from one of Pour Femme’s hit songs or really any GNR song at least once. The two were big names, so of course, fans went bonkers when they saw their favourite bands conversing.

You admired GNR. They were great, their music was phenomenal, and you had to admit, all of them were handsome as well, but someone that you couldn't seem to stop thinking about was Izzy fucking Stradlin. You loathed that fact.

You hadn't really spoken to him that night, and in general, very few words had ever been shared. But there was no need for them, for the tension that hung thick like smoke when you shared a room said enough. He was alluring in every sense of the word. You wanted to know more, but he never gave you the chance. In fairness, you didn't give him one either…

Look, you pranced around the idea of having a proper conversation with him because you had a reputation to uphold. You earned the title of notorious heartbreaker many magazine issues ago, and fans went insane for it. You were keeping up an image, and clearly, nothing ever stays private when you live in LA.

You closed the spread up hastily, pages warping at the sides from how tight your grip had become, and dropped it beside you, reaching for your temples instead. You’d had enough of thinking about him. The focus should've been on the performance just minutes away, and your birthday the day after. It was supposed to be a good day. You weren't about to let yourself ruin it by thinking about something so trivial. He was good-looking, yes, but there was a time and a place to be admiring him that wasn't in the dressing room before going on stage. 

Some small, needy thing in your brain called out to you ‘Would there ever be a time when you'd let yourself truly look at him?’

One of the stage crew peeped their head around the door frame to give a five-minute call. You heaved a sigh and pushed yourself up off of the sofa. You’d settled on thinking about it later.

The next day, your bandmates woke you up with a shout, jumping on your bed and singing silly, screechy versions of ‘Happy Birthday’.

You don’t know when it happened, but you got to an age where you didn’t see a point in doing anything on your birthday. It was a great excuse to eat a little more unhealthy than usual and go easier on yourself, but you saw no reason for extravagant celebrations.

“Fuck off,” you mumbled, pulling your quilt up over your head.

“It's your birthday and you're acting like a grump?! Booo!” your bassist teased from your bedside as they shook you back and forth.

“Get up! I didn’t make a cake this morning for you to not even look near it,” a voice called firmly from the doorway and you made your displeasure known with an overdramatic groan, muffled by the covers.

“Come on! We have a couple of things to do before tonight so get your ass up!”

Someone pulled the covers fully down and you blinked rapidly, trying to adjust to the sudden burst of light. “What’s happening tonight?”

“Obviously we’re all going out. I refuse to let you sit in this apartment and be all sad about getting older like last year. No chance.”

Of course, it was your guitarist who was taking charge of this assault. You knew how stubborn she could be, and therefore simply did as you were told, slipping out of bed and wandering to the kitchen with the rest of them trailing you like ducklings. You wanted to be mad at all three members for ganging up on you, but you couldn't find it within you to keep up the irritated furrow in your brow. It was nice to know they cared and wanted to see you happy, and they looked so pleased with themselves when you lit up at the sight of the cake, squealing and nudging each other excitedly. How were you ever supposed to be firm when they had such good intentions?

The three of them took you to lunch, afterwards tugging you in and out of an absurd amount of shops, telling you to choose something and insisting they would pay. You ended up back at the apartment with more bags than reasonable. They were having none of it when you started to argue that all of the presents were entirely too much, instead pushing you into a chair and playing dress-up, adding to your makeup, doing your hair and making you model all the clothes they’d bought you.

One thing you had managed to stand firm on saying no to that day was going to a club. They had wanted so desperately to bring you to one, begging with big, sparkly puppy eyes.

“Come on!” your bassist pleaded, actually clasping her hands together and leaning your way, sweetening her voice the best she could, “It’ll be so good. We promise to go easy on the booze–”

“Uhh no? That's the point–” your drummer was silenced by an elbow to the ribs.

“We promise to keep it light until we’re home again.”

You shook your head at the two, a smile creeping onto your face against your will.

“It would be fun to go to one. I know she was talking about going to the Whiskey tonight,” you jerked your head towards your guitarist who was rifling through every item of clothing you owned, “But I just don't think I would enjoy myself. I want to have fun with you all, but where can we have fun without the media breathing down our necks and watching every move we make?”

“I mean,” your bandmate spoke with a raised voice, knowing the sound would be slightly dampened by her position. She was basically downing in clothes at that point, “we could always go to The Cathouse.”

“Yeah, sure, let’s go to another habitat of GNR’s. Our manager would rip us a new one.”

“No, that's actually a good idea. I like it in there.”

“What?! You’ll go to The Cathouse but not The Whisky?”

You shrugged your shoulders before simply replying, “Apparently the Whiskey can't be trusted. That spread had a great picture of us, but it’s proof we’ll get no privacy.”

Just then, your phone rang, buzzing against the vanity you sat beside. You picked up and were met with your manager's gruff voice.

“Happy birthday.”

“Thank you, but I'd like to think I know you a bit better than that,” you spoke, admiring your bandmates' artistic skills in the mirror as you did, “What's wrong?”

He had his moments in which his well hidden soft spot for you all shone clear as day, but he never called just to say nice things.

“You lot better behave yourselves tonight. If I wake up tomorrow to your faces all over the news or on the front page of another magazine for the wrong reasons–”

“I’ve told them already to be sensible. We’ll be fine.”

“Who is that?” your drummer questioned leaning closer to hear the voice coming through.

“Our dear manager telling us to behave.”

“Oh for fuck sake! Get off our backs and mind your own business!” your guitarist yelled, coming towards you with an outfit in hand and signalling for you to give her the phone. You traded items. She leaned against the vanity and sighed deeply in annoyance. Even from a slight distance, you heard your manager's static voice ring loud and clear.

“Shut up you!” he bellowed back, loud enough your guitarist flinched slightly and had to pull the phone further from her ear, “You all need to start listening to me! Some of these days, one of you is going to get into bother for one reason or another. I will not take any shit from anyone on that fateful day because I have done nothing but try and keep you all on the straight and narrow–”

“Yap, yap, yap! Go jerk off or something!”

She quickly hung up as his outraged roars became deafening, putting your phone back in its original position.

“Put this on and then we’re leaving.”

It was relatively quiet as the four of you walked in, expected for a random Wednesday night. You may have been a bit overdressed for a mostly empty bar, but getting ready was half the fun. It was worth it when you were able to strut through the entrance knowing you looked hot. The outfit your bandmate put together, highlighting your best features. The makeup another had carefully done for you, making you look striking. Head-turning even. Dressed up, you felt confident. That was all that mattered.

You all filed in one after the other, talking and laughing as you went, but the smile on your face dropped when you saw who was sitting at the bar, sporting a brilliant grin of his own and tilting his head back to swallow the rest of his drink. You watched his Adam’s apple bob up and down in his throat, watched as his dark hair fell back around his face once upright again, unaware of your group, instead focused on something his own bandmate, whom you recognised as Steven, had said.

The night suddenly didn’t look so fun anymore, and it hadn't even started yet. You did not expect them to be there. It was an odd night in the week to be out drinking in a bar. Why on earth would they be out having drinks?! It was only three of them sitting there on the bar stools: Steven, Axl and him, but two of their unit missing didn’t make you feel any better about it. You might not have even minded it, but Izzy's presence made you unsure, a nervous shiver making its way through you.

There was a reason you kept yourself a distance away from him. You knew that if you got to know him properly, you'd end up in it too deep because you found him devastatingly attractive. From the shape of his lips to the way he carried himself, he was flawless in your eyes.

You longed to chat casually over a drink or two. You longed to charm him a bit and see how, if he was even interested, he'd reciprocate that curious flirting. But you felt like you had to stay away as you feared both of your reputations. Celebrities dating was nothing new, but when things went south it left a bruise on each of their images.

At the height of Pour Femme and Guns n’ Roses’ careers, that was a far from ideal situation.

Your bassist noticed how your steps had become hesitant, leaving you half-hidden behind the other two. She asked if you were okay, eyes worried. You looked at her, bit your lip and looked back to the three men sitting at the bar. She followed your gaze and sighed when she realised, slowing a tad to match you as your other two bandmates walked on. They either didn’t notice or just didn’t care, too engrossed in an argument over something no doubt ridiculous. Your drummer's eyebrows only ever furrowed like that if they were trying to explain something, which was not an area they excelled in.

“Ignore them,” your bassist whispered, leaning very slightly towards your ear.

“I love you, but that might be one of the stupidest things to ever come out of your mouth.”

“Okay fair. But look,” she said your name gently, “You can't run from him forever. I get why you are doing this, but… why not loosen up a bit? Just for tonight.”

Your face twisted up against your will and she playfully pushed your shoulder with her own.

“Come on. There's no media here, you look smoking and it's your birthday. You should be allowed to have a bit of fun on your birthday of all days.”

You considered her words. Maybe you were a bit too cautious when it came to him, but so what? You had good reason to be! Although your worries were justified, she made a good point. You should've been allowed this at least. If you weren't going to get shitfaced, you'd let yourself have that wiggle room.

Just for the night.

You sharply inhaled through your nose and straightened your back, looking your bandmate dead in the eyes and nodded. She let out a quiet squeal and threw an arm over your shoulders, tugging you in for a side-hug.

“Go get 'em girl!”

You rolled your eyes and walked towards the bar, stride more sure than before. If you were going to do it, you needed something in your system.

Your two other bandmates had already taken their seats, of course, sitting right beside the three men your gut screamed at you not to look near for even a second, so you didn’t, instead going to the free seat right beside Izzy at the other end of the bar and ordering yourself something strong.

You were shuffling your stool in when you heard his voice.

“Brave choice for your first drink.”

“Well, you’ll get nowhere without bravery.”

He hummed and a beat passed before he spoke again, “Who taught you that?”

“No one. I learnt it with time.”

“Interesting.”

Your drink was placed in front of you and you thanked the bartender, winking at them.

“I don't think I've ever properly introduced myself, but I also don't think I need an introduction.”

“Cocky,” you said with a smirk, raising your glass to your lips and taking a swig, ”I assume I don't need one either.”

He said your name. You’d imagined him doing this, shaping his mouth to fit around the word, low timbre making it sound almost like a purr, but your imagination did a poor job at doing the real thing justice. You liked how it sounded coming from his lips. Very much so.

“Of course, I know you. Those magazine journalists can't seem to keep your name out of their mouths. They say a lot about you, you know.”

“I'm aware.”

You felt him looking at you before spying him doing so from the corner of your eye, observing you as you studied the liquor bottles lining the wall behind the bar. You waited for the prickling sensation like insects burrowing under your skin that often came with unexpected eyes, but it never came. His gaze didnt feel as… intense as you imagined it'd be. Actually, it felt good. You liked knowing he was taking a somewhat interest in you. It was exciting.

“Magazines talk a lot of shit,” he started suddenly, and you giggled.

“Tell me something I don't know.”

“It’s unbelievable the amount they've spewed, and yet, after all of those paragraphs, I still don't really know anything about you.”

“Well then. Here’s your chance to shoot,” you said quietly, looking him straight in the eyes as you went for another sip of your drink, an easy grin still on your lips despite the sweat gathering in your palms. He mirrored your expression.

part 2 coming soon…

[queen-of-deans-booty]

Misjudged

Pairing: Dean Winchester x Female!Reader

Word Count: ~2.2k

Warnings: angst, car accident, getting hurt by car accident, almost dying, minor fluff at the end

Summary: A confrontation at a party sends you racing back home in anger. Dean follows behind you and watches the unthinkable happen. Now it’s up to him to save you.

Square Filled: enemies to lovers (2021) for @spndeanbingo

Author’s Note: any and all comments are greatly appreciated <3

x

Normally, you love a good party. You love getting loose and forgetting what a shitty week you’ve had, but tonight is different. You’re on a mission and you’re not going to stop until you get what you want. Luna called you twenty minutes ago crying because she wanted to get picked up, and you immediately rushed over at the thought that someone hurt your little sister. She’s newly eighteen but she shouldn’t have been at this party in the first place. She’s too nice and naive for her own good, so you do your best to look out for her.

Too many bodies litter the living room holding homemade drinks and joints, causing the room to stink of stale marijuana.

“Luna!!”

There's no point in yelling when the music is enough to deafen a person, but you still try in hopes she’s close enough to hear you. Once you get past the mosh pit, the room becomes more open with fewer people. On the other side of the room is one person who makes your blood boil in rage.

Dean Winchester.

Of course, he’d be here. Suddenly, the thought of Dean making your sister cry is the only thing you can think about so you stalk over to him. He’s playing pool against his friends and winning, but not for long. You swipe your hand over the pool table, messing up the balls and Dean’s shot.

“Hey!” Dean whips his head to face the culprit and smirks when he realizes it’s you. “Oh, hey, sweetheart. Come to play?”

You bring your open palm back and slap Dean across the face. His friends go still with shock, and Dean moves his jaw back and forth as he processes what just happened.

“How dare you bring Luna here after I told you not to!”

Dean sets his pool cue on the table but otherwise doesn’t react to you slapping him.

“How do you know it was me who brought her here?”

“You’re our neighbor, Dean. She heard you talking about the party and you offered to bring her here.”

“She wanted to come here, Y/N. I was already on my way when she asked me to drive her. I didn’t see the big deal.”

“The big deal is that this party is full of drugs and alcohol and men with granny hands.”

“Last I checked, she’s eighteen. She can think for herself.”

“Last I checked, she’s my family, not yours. Stay out of my goddamn life and out of my business. You don’t see me going to your house and bringing Sam here.”

Dean tips his head back and laughs. “Good luck trying to get Sam over here. This isn’t really his scene.”

“I don’t care. Don’t ever go near Luna again.”

“Damn, man, you need to have a drink. Unwind,” one of Dean’s friends comments. 

You lunge toward his friend but Dean wraps his arms around your waist to prevent you from attacking. For a split second, you like having his arms around you. They feel strong and safe but then reality sets in and you push Dean off you.

“Let go of me. Where is Luna?”

“I don’t know. It's a big party.” Dean sees the glare on your face and fights back a smirk. “Relax. I saw her on the phone with you so I told Cas to give her a ride home.”

“Oh. Good.”

Castiel is a good guy so you’re relaxed at the thought of Luna being in his care. It’s the only part of Dean you tolerate. Castiel keeps him in check. With that, you turn on your heels and start to head toward the front door. Dean abandons his pool game to chase after you.

“Why don’t you stay?”

“Over my dead fucking body.”

You push through the crowd and leave out the front door. The ground crunches underneath your feet from how crispy the ice makes the grass. You press the button on your car which makes it unlock, and you sigh when you hear Dean still chasing after you.

“Wait, Y/N!”

“Leave me alone, Dean. Go away.”

“I don’t get why you hate me so much. What did I ever do to you?”

You spin on your heels to face him and he stops right before he collides with you.

“Hate you? No, I don’t hate you. You piss me the fuck off. Do you really think you can flash that smile of yours and call me sweetheart, and I’ll forget what an arrogant bastard you are? Not going to happen.” You open your car door. “Now, if you’ll excuse me, I’m going home.”

“Wait. Let me drive you. It’s icy out there.”

“That’s nice of you to care, but I don’t need you, Dean.”

You get into your car and turn it on. Dean curses when you back out of the crowded driveway and start to drive away. What kind of friend man would he be if he let you drive off into the icy night?

Dean curses when he sees your tail lights disappearing around the corner, and he runs over to his shiny black Impala that he often catches you checking out. Wherever he goes, it’s a chick magnet but he only wants one chick in there.

You.

He leaves the party and follows you down the road, stepping on the pedal to keep up with you. He wouldn’t forgive himself if something happened while driving home, and he didn’t know about it.

Yes, the roads are icy and it’s dark in these mountains and your headlights don’t really work well, but you’re doing fine. There isn’t any ice that you can see so as long as you continue at the speed you’re at, you should get home safely.

Key word: should.

Your phone rings but instead of taking your eyes off the road to answer it, you blindly swipe the screen until the call connects. Before you can say anything, Dean’s deep voice comes through the phone.

“Slow the fuck down, Y/N.”

You look in the rearview mirror and see the sleek headlights belonging to the Impala right behind you. For some reason, you’re in a mischievous mood that wants to piss him off. 

“You want me to slow down?”

Instead of doing what he wants, you press down the gas pedal.

“Y/N—”

“I know how to drive, Dean. I’ve been doing it since I was sixteen.”

“You’re going to fucking crash. Slow down.”

“Bite me,” you growl and hang up on him.

Just to piss him off, you go faster on the slippery mountain roads. You’re not going to admit this to Dean, but you’re kind of scared. With going downhill, you’re finding it harder to slow down. Your brakes work but the ice on the roads makes it hard for your tires to grip anything. Dean would only rub it in your face that he was right and you don’t want to hear it.

You’ve driven these roads all your life in worse conditions, but there’s something about this night that makes it more dangerous. The news has been warning residents of black ice on the roads, more so in the mountains than anywhere else.

Dean keeps a steady distance behind you which is a comfort because if something happens to you, at least you’ll be found. You press on the brakes only slightly but that causes your tires to swerve, and you grip the steering wheel with a deathly grip.

The deadliest part of black ice is that you don’t know you’ve hit it until it’s too late, and it’s too late for you. Your car starts skidding on the icy roads, and you try your best to get out of it by turning your wheel toward the direction the car is going in. That doesn’t seem to help, and your eyes widen when your headlights catch something.

A tree. You’re not wearing your seatbelt.

In the blink of a second, the front of your car smashes into the thick tree trunk, causing it to spin out of control. The side of your head smacks against the hard ridge of the window, and you lose your grip on the steering wheel as the car skids closer and closer to the cliff’s edge. You press down on the brake as hard as you can but that doesn’t seem to help.

Either you’re going to die by falling off the cliff or by plunging into the icy waters below. Your car comes to a stop right before you fall off the cliff’s edge, but the front half of the car is teetering over the edge. One false move and you're going to go over. You’re still-shocked and gripping the steering wheel with a deathly grip, afraid to let go. Tears roll down your cheek that mix with the blood coming from your forehead. Silence and then you hear his voice.

“Y/N?”

“Dean?” you cry.

“I’m right here, sweetheart.”

“I’m so scared,” you whimper.

“I’m right here. I’m not going to let you fall.” The back window was shattered when it hit the tree, so he is able to climb inside if he wanted to. “Can you get your seatbelt off?”

“I’m not wearing one.”

“Fuck. Okay, when I get you out, we’re going to have a serious conversation about proper car etiquette.”

The car starts to spin but Dean doesn’t say anything about it which makes you realize it’s your vision that’s spinning. Your head throbs in pain and black spots enter your vision.

“Dean, I hit my head. It hurts.”

“I know, sweetheart. I need you to stay awake for me, okay? Can you turn around?” With slow movements, you look back at Dean. He doesn’t shine the flashlight directly on your face but he can see the river of blood on your face. He’s fucking scared but if he starts to show it, you’ll start to panic. “I’m right here.”

Dean removes his jacket and lays it over the edge of the window where it broke to prevent glass from sticking to his skin. He keeps one leg on the ground and puts his other leg inside the car to get closer to you. He leans in as far as he can and stretches his hand out to you.

“Grab my hand and I’ll pull you out.”

“What if I fall over?”

“I won’t let that happen.”

Tears spring to your eyes at the thought of never seeing your family again. “Please tell my mom I love her. Tell Luna that too. Tell her I’m sorry.”

“Y/N, you’re going to be fine. Just grab my hand.”

“I’m scared,” you cry.

“I know you are but I need you to be brave right now, okay?” You nod shakily. “I can’t go any further so you’re going to have to climb over the seat. No sudden movements.”

You slowly rise and put both feet on the clothed seat. You grab the back of the seat and turn to Dean who is patient and calm. You know he’s freaking out so you appreciate him keeping a calm head. You sling your leg through the small gap over the center console and the car starts to sway lightly. You halt your movements and calm down when the car doesn’t fall over the edge.

You slowly lift your other leg over the center console but you step on one of your dogs’ toys that squeaks. Your foot slips and you slam into the back of the driver’s seat. The car immediately tips over and you jump to grab Dean’s hand. He pulls you out of the car just as it falls over the edge. You gasp and clutch onto his hand with a death grip because not only did the car go over the edge, but you did as well.

Dean is the only thing keeping you from certain death.

Dean uses his God-given strength and pulls you up from the edge and onto the safety of solid ground. You fall into his arms and cry, the adrenaline already starting to wear off.

“You’re okay,” Dean mutters. He strokes your hair to not only calm you but to calm himself. “You’re okay.” You pull away from him and he finally can see the damage done to your head. “You’re bleeding.”

“You saved me.”

He tucks a strand of bloody hair behind your ear. “I’ll always save you.”

You look down at his lips. Maybe it’s because of what just happened or maybe it’s because your emotions are all out of wack but you’re seeing Dean in a new light. As much as he wants to kiss you, you have more pressing matters.

“I’m not a doctor and you need to get that checked out. Come on.” He helps you to your feet and wraps a strong arm around you. “I’ll call your parents from the car.”

What would you have done if Dean didn’t follow you? How long would you have been out here for? Would you have died? He could have let you go off that cliff but he didn’t. Maybe you’ve misjudged him. Maybe, just maybe, he’s not as bad as you make him out to be.

x

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[berryispunk]

What I Didn't Say

pairing: Frankie Morales x gn! reader

tags: mention of mental health struggles, depression, inner turmoil, comfort, fluff, Frankie being the best boyfriend ever, soft! Frankie

notes: This was written mostly for myself but if even one person finds comfort in this too, my job is done. unbeta'd

word count: 1,9 k

It is a regular Tuesday. Same process at work. The same dumb questions, the same people. But something is off, something inside of you. Something buried so deep you almost forgot yourself it was there. But it crawled onto the surface slowly and gradually over the last days, tinting everything darker, muting the colors around you. 

The signs were there for a while now, building up one by one. You should have known better, but you decided to ignore them all instead.

Throwing yourself into work, listening to music on your earphones constantly, never a minute alone with your own thoughts, too afraid of what they might reveal.  

It makes you feel heavy, slowed down and every day feels endless. 

Tasks you’re usually able to solve in minutes dragged on for hours. 

You feel numb, dissociated and irritated and after a while you weren’t able to lie to yourself anymore. 

Your unpleasant visitor inside your mind unpacked its baggage once again, making himself comfortable in your brain and wouldn’t check out any time soon.

When it is finally time to go home after work you feel particularly drained and still the thought of returning home into your tiny apartment, which mirrored your inner mess perfectly at the moment, makes you feel even more uneasy.

So you drive around the city for a while with no real destination in mind. 

Your window pulled down, the cool evening air a welcoming distraction of your whirlwind of thoughts. Your mind wandering around, not able to form one clear thought, too many voices but still you feel utterly alone. 

As alone as ever. Isolated even if you’re not. You have friends, colleagues, a loving boyfriend but you feel miles apart from all of them. Nobody is able to understand your pain and you are too tired to explain. It’s not that you didn’t think about opening up to someone, you did. But how can you explain this big sadness inside of you when you don’t know how to put it into words?

After a while your bluetooth speakerphone ringing brings you back into the present and without even knowing, or caring, who’s on the other end of the line you pick up. 

“Hello ?”

“Hey, beautiful” the voice on the other end is rich and warm, making you smile for the first time today. It was your boyfriend Frankie. 

“Hey… sorry I didn’t call you earlier,I-uh…was busy” you try to lie, masking your inner turmoil. But he does know you better or at least he knows something is off.

“You’re not at home, are you?” he asks, a hint of doubt in his tone.

“No, I'm still driving. Why?”

There’s a deep rumbling laugh on the other end.

“Well, I am in front of your apartment door and nobody’s opening, so safe to say no one’s home…”

Your first instinct is to ask why the hell he’s standing at your apartment door without telling you first, but then you remembered that’s just who Frankie is. He always let actions speak louder than words. Showing up when you least expect it is just one part of the Morales package. He’s a rare gem in the world of macho-dickheads. Sometimes you still wonder what he sees in you out of all people he possibly could’ve be with ? But you count your blessings every day. 

“I’ll come home now. Give me about…” you glance at the digital clock in your car dashboard “15 minutes” you add and he hums in agreement before you hang up. 

Honestly you’re not really in the mood for small talk or any other form of human interactions in general, but you’ve been avoiding Frankie for a few days now. Mostly for selfish reasons but also because you don’t want to drag him down into your abyss so you decide to dive in head first.

15 minutes later on the dot you kill the motor in front of your apartment complex, making your way up to the third floor with heavy steps. 

You can’t shake the tiredness off, it still lingers even when your heart flutters in your chest as soon as you spot Frankie leaning against the wall next to your front door. 

His signature cap worn deep, his arms crossed over his chest, making him look as broad as ever and whistling some melody to himself. 

The moment he spots you his whole face lights up, his eyes crinkling and his face so full of genuine joy by just seeing you it makes you feel incredibly guilty for not wanting to see him just seconds ago. 

He steps towards you, his smile only widening and making your stomach do somersaults.  

He wraps his arms around your waist and dips his head to kiss your cheek, the visor of his cap touching your temple. 

“Sorry you had to wait for so long… I–” you contemplate telling him the whole truth, but decide against it, not wanting to drag his mood down too. 

“Work was a lot”, you lie again and he just shakes his head. 

“‘s alright, I don’t mind. I mean, I could’ve at least texted you beforehand, but where’s the surprise in that?” he laughs as you fumble with your keys to let you both inside. 

It just dawned on you that your place isn’t particularly tidy right now and you feel heat creeping up at your cheeks in embarrassment. 

“Sorry.. didn’t have time to tidy up. I know it’s a mess…” you sigh as you let your bag slump  to the ground and kick off your shoes, trying hard to not let him feel how disappointed you are about yourself, but Frankie doesn’t say a thing. 

He just kicks off his shoes as well and places the plastic back he was holding onto the kitchen counter. 

“I brought some Chinese take-out” he says, making it sound like the most obvious thing to do when in reality it is not. You’re not used to this kind of attention and it makes you feel all kinds of emotions. Mostly good of course, but it also makes you question if you’re able to give him the same amount back or if you’re losing in the partner department, especially the last few weeks.

“Why did you do that?” you ask, the words coming out quicker than your mind has time to process it.

“Do what?”

“This” you point onto the bag of food he’s just about to unpack and he stills his movement.

“I thought you like chinese…” he says, his brows furrowed in confusion. 

“I do, it’s just.. you could’ve texted first,you know” you say irritated, regretting your harsh voice immediately as you see his shoulders sag slightly.

“I am sorry, it’s just–” he trails off, rubbing his neck sheepishly. 

“I had the feeling something was off and you’re kinda short and snippy the last few days. I just wanted to check on you and… “ a short breath “I’m sorry if I overstepped or anything I’m just, argh, i don’t know… worried?”

His rumbling leaves you speechless for a moment. Too much to unpack for your depressed mind. You slump onto the stool next to your kitchen counter, running a hand through your hair. You should’ve known he notices your change, he’s a really attentive person after all.

“I am sorry, Frankie” you simply say and you mean it but the words have greater meaning than just an apology for your behavior.

“You have nothing to be sorry for” he assures you and it doesn’t ease your mind in the slightest instead it makes you feel even worse. 

You don’t know how to bring this up because you’re not good at communicating your feelings, you never learned how. So you say nothing in return and the silence is deafening. 

You feel his big hands gently caressing your arms and it almost causes you to sob, the gentleness of his touch unlike everything else. 

“Please, talk to me” he pleads, his soft brown eyes searching yours and you can’t stand it any longer so you rise up from your seat and wrap your arms around his midsection, burying your face against his chest. 

“I’m not good at this, Frankie… I wish I would be but I am not. I am a mess, simple as that” you mumble against his shirt, your voice muffled by the fabric. 

He stays silent for a moment, his hand crawling the back of your head before he murmurs against your hair “It’s okay… you don’t have to explain anything if you don’t want to. I am here, even if you don’t wanna talk at all that’s also fine with me” 

The tears prick hot in corners of your eyes, his voice like a balm for your troubled mind but it doesn’t stop your inner world from colliding. He should run as long as he has the chance, find someone better that isn’t as broken and as complicated as you are. The next words start to bubble up before you have the chance to stop them.

“I’m sorry for pushing you away the last few weeks, it’s just my default response, you know. Didn’t want to burden you with my shit.”

“You don’t burden me with this, lemme’ carry some of that weight with you, okay?” he reasons softly with you, his hand still cradling the back of your head gently, placing a soft kiss on the top of your hair. 

“I don’t know how.. everytime I tried to share my darkness with someone, they left. I’m scared to lose you too, because you–” the following words are chocked “You are the best thing I ever had and I really don’t wanna fuck this up” you admit. 

“You won’t lose me just because you have some demons to face, beautiful. We all have, believe me I do too. It’s getting easier once you’re able to talk about it, I promise. I am here to stay, okay?” he lifts your head gently from his chest, his thumbs stroking your cheekbones and the honesty of his words written all over his face. 

You nod as he kisses your forehead, his lips lingering for a moment on your skin. 

“Let me in, okay? That’s all I ask. We figure the rest out as we go…” 

“Okay” you ultimately answer, your voice strained with barely contained emotions. 

“But don’t say I didn’t warn you, yeah?” 

“I served in the army. Nothing scares me off that easily anymore, trust me” he chuckles deeply before he lets go of your head to get some silverware. “Let’s eat something okay? And afterwards we can watch some movie you like.” 

“Even a cheesy romance movie?” you retort with a smirk as you take a seat on the kitchen stool once again. 

“Even a cheesy, cringey romance movie if that lifts your spirits, but you have to at least let me make some comments…” he grins as he places some fried chicken and noodles on your plate first like it’s the most natural thing to do. Which for him it might be. 

“Deal” you say as you start munching on some of the food, watching him putting some Chinese food on his own plate. “Thank you” you murmur and words aren’t enough to express the extend of your gratitude.

“It’s nothing” he shrugs off while taking a seat next to you. 

“Wrong, it’s everything”, you correct and he holds your gaze for a long moment before he smiles warmly and starts eating.

And for the first time in a while you feel like maybe happiness is in reach again. 

[reverd-ck]

valentines with choso <3

wc: 1.5k (i yapped too hard)

cw: kms exaggeration/joke

Choso knew he liked you the moment you walked into class.

He knew he was in love with you the moment you sat beside him. Asked for his name. Got his number. All of that.

Seriously, when was the last time a girl he knew from no where asked him for stuff like this? And a pretty one at that?

He couldn’t help but have you in his mind from time to time. 

And you couldn’t either.

He was, objectively, cute. You loved his hairstyle instantly when you saw it. Spacebuns?! In a university class? Sign me up. 

You soon began loving more parts of him the more time you spent with him. The tattoo on the bridge of his nose? The rough eyebags? You hoped he didn’t catch you staring all the time, because holy this man was hot.

You were intrigued. You wanted to know more about him, so you talked to him.

Was it a talking stage? Or did he think of you guys as just friends? Is it normal to be enjoying someone’s company this much? 

You both had your own friends, and your own social circles. But as you and Choso grew closer, they slowly realized what was going on.

His friends were jealous that he got a girl before them, no matter how many times Choso tried to insist you guys weren’t dating. Your friends were ecstatic over the fact that you finally tried seeking a relationship, no matter how many times you said you guys were “just friends.”

But the teasing of your friends didn’t drive you guys apart. It didn’t make you guys be embarrassed to hang out with the other. It might of even made you like each other more.

So when the chill of fall slowly turned into the biting cold of winter, you found yourself coming over and hanging out at his place a lot, and the same vice versa. 

Watching movies, laughing together. On one occasion, you did Choso’s unique hairstyle for him and you put little stickers and hairclips on him. The picture of him in the cute little get up was secretly your home screen wallpaper. It was too cute, him wearing a scrunched up expression because of the tackiness of the accessories. 

Your friends say that you’re dumb as hell.

His friends say that he’s an idiot.

Just about anyone could see the romantic tension between you two, yet neither you nor Choso would admit it out loud to each other. Left to pine in “secret”. 

₊˚⊹♡

Soon enough, February 14th was getting a little too close, and you were panicking if you should ask Choso out.

That was basically a confession. And you didn’t want to make the first step. What if he thought of you guys as only friends? What if the teasing from his friends were just a joke? 

You spent a lot of the time in your day overthinking. Choso saw during the classes you had together, you always seemed preoccupied with something in your head, and never really looking at him directly in the eyes for more than a few seconds.

Now he was overthinking. Did you not like him anymore?

The class was spent with you two together in silence, staring into the polished wood of the desk, lost in your own thoughts.

Thursday, February 13th felt like you had the most pressure in your life. It felt more than just 4 assignments all due on the same day. It felt more than two tests back to back that you didn’t study for.

You decided that you were going to ask him out. You were going to be brave, say “Do you want to be my valentine?” on text, then power off your phone and bury yourself alive.

A great plan. Foolproof, maybe. 

But what would you do after? If he said yes, you didn’t even have any chocolates or teddy bears to give, and now you just seem like a total loser and a leech. 

But what if he said no? Now, you just lost a valuable friendship and someone who made going through each day just a little easier.

You flopped down onto your bed. It was so tiring, thinking and planning and worrying. 

Yes, you needed to think this through. But now, you should just go to sleep and be indecisive in the morning, and not late at night. That was way more doable than asking someone out.

Choso, on the other hand, was in the same predicament as you.

Same “What if?’s”, same “But’s ” were also plaguing Choso’s brain. But Choso was more prepared. He already had his chocolates, with the same brand you loved. He had his small plushie, which was your favorite animal. It was annoying to get them, as he needed to hide them from his peeking friends and, of course, you.

Yet, he had no plan on how to present them to you, and how to even ask you. Would he just go blunt? No, that will make it seem like he put zero effort into it and just wanted someone with him on Valentines Day. A long, heartfelt message would be too tacky, but it would certainly be romantic, only if you returned the feelings. It would be awfully embarrassing if you didn’t like him in the first place.

He covered his face in his hands. Seriously, why did it have to be so hard?

He should man up, for gods sake. Just ask you and get on with his day, whether or not you said no or yes. Rejection is something everybody should experience. 

But he couldn’t take rejection, especially not from you. He didn’t want to take the risk of losing the friendship that was so precious to both of you guys.

But he bought the chocolates. And he already liked you for about 5 months.

It was now or never.

₊˚⊹♡

Choso was about to kill himself. 

Sorry, exaggeration. He was about to bash his head against the wall.

He sent the text. Dear God, why did he send that? And why did he let it just stay? Why didn’t he just unsend it right away? 

Was it for the hopes that you would actually get to see it? 

Well, now it was too late to go back. The text message is forever engraved into the data of his phone and yours. 

Stupid, stupid text message. Did his fingers have to hit send?

It was supposed to be him practicing sending that. Type out the message, then delete it. Paraphrase his sentences before actually sending it. 

There was no possible way he sent a text message that looked that desperate.

Choso slouched onto his bed and groaned, throwing his phone across his desk.

It had already been 15 minutes. That dragged into another hour. Then two hours. Then it was almost midnight and you still haven’t even opened the message yet.

Choso was panicking internally. You would’ve checked your messages at least once during the four hours that had passed. 

Have you already read the message by looking at the notification? Were you so disgusted by the fact he asked you out that you completely neglected to respond?

His hands were in his hair, pulling at the shoulder-length strands. 

Seriously, how much of a dumbass did he have to be?

He couldn’t sleep much that night. He was half awake, overthinking and looking over to see if his phone screen had lit up. But it was always just a random notification, coming from an app Choso barely used anymore. He sighed and turned his phone off, spending the rest of the night not catching a wink of sleep.

₊˚⊹♡

Luckily for you, he asked first.

And luckily for him, you agreed.

You only saw his message in the morning of Valentines. Of course, you immediately replied yes, saving Choso from spending another sleepless hour after seeing his message get left on delivered.

The few seconds after replying to that message felt a little unreal. You collapsed onto your bed, unable to stop smiling. 

You did it.

You were going on a date with one of the best people you knew. The one you not-so silently chased all these months.

Life was perfect right now. You didn’t want anything to change, not after this one.

₊˚⊹♡

Six PM. Friday. 

To say you were excited wouldn’t be accurate.

Actually, it was more of a jittery nervousness. 

You wondered why, actually. Why were you nervous meeting up with a guy you were friends with for almost this whole year?

He opened the door before you could finish gathering your thoughts. 

You looked up. 

Perfect.

He was perfect, just like how you saw him your first class the day you met. Perfect, with his signature hairstyle, never once changing it. He looked the same as if this was just a regular hangout you guys had almost everyday.

As if it’s anything like that.

You greeted him nervously and stepped inside.

He returned the favor, looking just as bit as awkward as you felt. 

Shit, what if confessing to you made you guys as awkward as strangers now? 

But it didn’t.

The rest of the night went smoothly with him. The one you were half-chasing since the start of the school year. 

You couldn’t be anymore happier. 

And Choso couldn’t either.

a/n

happy valentines day guys!!

got lazy writing the last part

and it got way too long so i had to delete some parts of it

thx for reading sigmas!

dividers by @.enchanthings-a @.saradika-graphics

[violasghost]

The Exes and Oh’s of Chenford-The Rookie 7x06 Review

So, they went there! I wasn’t sure if they would. With past history, was kind of thinking it would be a tease and maybe there would be a kiss and then one of them would get cold feet and poof, we’d have to be tortured for a while longer. But guess now that they did cross that bridge, I’m kind of experiencing mixed emotions as a result.

On the one hand, Chenford is sizzling! I mean c’mon, everyone can see it. Hell, even my mom who is a casual viewer walked in the room when the gala scene was on and happened to notice Chenford and questioned off handedly when she saw them acting awkwardly around one another, ‘I thought they were a couple?’ in reference to Lucy and Tim.

And honestly, that said, Exes aside, they really do act like a couple, do they not? If a casual bystander were to observe them leaning in speaking to one another or intimately gazing across the room, they would likely assume they were an item or at the very minimum, very close. So, packing that little observation aside—we still have our purple elephant in the room. The thing they dare never to speak of the big reason for the breakup. Don’t know why its so taboo. I’m hoping this will be explored down the line, and the writers have not decided to gloss over everything and just treat them like two horny exes, since we still don’t have any answers as to really—why? (Other than, perhaps it may have brought it more ratings because it creates more drama and added bonus-drives the Chenford fans nuts.)

I think what frustrates me (and it’s not just this episode, this has been building slowly over time) and don't get me wrong, I did appreciate the many lovely intimate moments between Lucy and Tim and Melissa and Eric did not disappoint in the slightest (they did phenomenal with the material they were given), but the part that is missing, that has always been missing, is communication. They had a few opportunities to open up and maybe even dive a bit into the postmortem of their relationship. Like at the ‘Turn in your Ex’ booth. The writers could have easily cut out one of the many ‘grumpy Tim’ clips in lieu of one heartfelt admission from either Lucy or Tim about something they were feeling they felt short on when they were a couple, even if it was something funny/annoying about what they thought about the other. Then they get to the surveillance van, another close intimate moment—and another opportunity missed for some kind of personal admission of true feelings; and when Lucy is sipping the glass of wine at the Gala and they have a moment to kind of reflect and pause and still, nada about their personal feelings, and then lastly it’s the morning after and they both walk away awkwardly—yeah I get it was weird and they are both afraid to go there, but someone’s gotta crack (my money’s on Tim doing it first btw).

There were heaps and tons of longing looks, angst, all that. So much I almost wonder where was this Tim and Lucy in S6 when they were quarrelling all the time? S7E6 version of Tim and Lucy was flirty, sexy, and had chemistry off the charts (chemistry has never been their problem), but as far as talking about their feelings go, I’m sorry but Chenford gets a big fat ‘F’ from moia. There has been no improvement since their breakup and really no resolution or growth shown to prove they are ready for Chenford 2.0. (SPOLER CHAT: Wasn’t there an interview awhile ago from Eric saying Tim was doing the work and going to therapy or something?) Maybe that’s still coming up, but this really needs to be shown, and I think this needs to 100% be his focus if he ever wants to have a chance of getting back with Lucy. And honestly, I think our girl Lucy needs to own up to her feelings too and stop hiding behind what’s comfortable and safe and confront it head on. I still have hope for our star-crossed duo, but I think they have to get their sh*t together first. They can both pretend that they are focusing on their careers or whatever, but they both have some growing up to do emotionally and mentally if they ever want to be in a real adult partnership and relationship.

Taking a step back, I truthfully go back and forth on the better scenario, because although I do like the other characters, I’m sorry but Nolan and Bailey got married what less than a year ago and their romantic scenes are pretty much non-existent at this point, so perhaps allowing Lucy and Tim to play in the kiddie pool is a good thing, for now? I mean some of what they are doing appears pretty immature for where they were couple-wise, but they are getting a lot more action and screen time this way. I guess we as the Chenford-nation can’t always get everything we want. But we are getting lots of sexy time and angst. And when we want more, we just turn to fan fiction, right? 😉

For the other characters, my heart went out to Miles. He really did try his best to be honorable and be there for his girl. I hope he finds someone soon. Actually, I kind of saw a small spark between Miles and Celina, not sure if anyone else saw that but they might be kind of cute together, no?

I did like Nolan and Bailey having a rare fight. It was refreshing to see the perfect couple with flaws. Kinda feel for Nolan on that one though, but also Bailey since she was the one who had to deal with her psychopathic ex. I think Nolan was smothering her though, making her stay at Lucy’s place and all. It was her way of having her own power, so it was understandable. And yey-Jason’s dead, end of that storyline, so even better. Thanks Malvado!

I love Wesley and Angela but Wesley dude, needed to relax a bit about the detective, man Wesley was really obsessed with that guy. Yeah, he admitted he had sexual fantasies about Wesley’s wife but it was in the confidence of his therapist and Wesley has to trust Angela to know she wouldn’t act on it and Angela is totally capable of defending herself. Anyhow, stupid macho behavior IMO.

Looking forward to next week. Also really hope when Tim tells Nolan “Don’t screw up like I did with Lucy,” that maybe not right away but at some point, Nolan tells Tim back that, “It’s never too late.”

And just cause I couldn’t resist, leaving the below gif here too because Viva la Chenford! <3