#some war hero/veteran thing lmao

[alarrylarrie]

Amanda, I love you❤️ please don't leave the larrie fandom. I swear, you and some other vet larrie blogs are the only ones keeping me sane here✌️😘

Hey love! I love you too! I’m not planning on leaving? If someone else said I was, they’re a silly goose.

[jcollinswrites]

Hiii! Jumping on the trauma wagon, you said the OC had to deal with trauma growing up. Which of the protags would you say is the least and most traumatized? Asking for a friend and not because i love angsty heroes 👀

Hmm, they all had to deal with hardship in different ways.

I think the least traumatized in general might be the thief. The thief grew up very poor but they always had a loving family that supported them in every way they could.

The priest has some trauma from early childhood that still bothers them, but their circumstances changed drastically soon after and they quickly managed to get the emotional support needed to get (almost) over it.

The most traumatized... is a debate between the captain and the noble 🤔 If you're playing the captain (in the future, it's not out yet), then you'll be able to choose if your character is a war veteran or not. So if you are, then... there's gonna be some shit you have to deal with. If not, then the character is not gonna feel that angsty.

For the noble however... Yeah, the noble is definitely not completely sane lmao. Out of all of them, the noble had the worst childhood, and they are still very restricted in everything regarding their personal life. They are in denial about their own mental problems, they deflect all the time because nobody taught them how to deal with these things, and depending whether you chose to be a widower or not, the noble may or may not have started to realize this.

It's definitely gonna be an experience when the noble starts building up genuine human connections for the first time in their life :D

Thanks for the message ❤️ (and sorry for the long answer 😅)

[altocat]

Ever Crisis: The First Soldier CHAPTER 5 Recap

Now that Sephiroth has joined the game, expect a lot more rambling/inane bias.

We open back up in the cave. The trio is resting when Sephiroth whistles to them to round them up. Glenn is pissy at the idea of them taking orders from a kid.

We meet up with Seph, where he tells us we'll be cutting through Cawpine Caverns. He said he spotted the Rhadorans there, so he thinks there's probably a base. He's got a mind to go run in there and kill shit.

Glenn keeps calling him a "cyborg", though he said he'll accept Seph's leadership since Seph is a big hero. He also threatens to kick Seph's ass if he whistles for them again. Seph pouts and trails unhappily behind them.

The group walks along a long trail thick with Mako. Seph holds them up and APOLOGIZES about whistling before, saying it was rude. He didn't realize. He admits he hasn't really had many opportunities to actually interact with people. This is his first real field assignment. Sheltered lab rat Seph confirmed??

Seph says him being a hero is a LIE. He said Shinra made him the face of the program and manufactured all of his "achievements". It was all one big recruitment ploy. He doesn't think he's a hero and he doesn't WANT to be one.

Glenn warms to this slightly and tells him now's his chance to prove himself to be a REAL hero. After all, he's freakishly strong in combat.

Seph doesn't want to be a hero. He says he just wants to live a normal life. But he mumbles it so the others can't hear. He said it's "never going to happen anyway". My heart is actually breaking??? OW.

They move to a waterfall. Natural materia has formed here. We have a very familiar Nibelheim-esque callback scene. Matt infodumps some familiar dialogue and Seph practically winks at the camera all "HUH NEAT".

Glenn reveals he got into trouble a lot as a kid, acting out how often he had to apologize for screwing around. Seph...doesn't understand him acting goofy. But it actually makes him laugh a little. AWWWW.

Oh god here we go. Sephiroth very awkwardly shows them a PICTURE of HOLY FUCKING SHIT LUCRECIA IT'S LUCRECIA OMFG. He calls her "Jenova". Seph asks if they've ever met or seen her before. It's a really detailed Remake Trilogy-esque pic of Lucrecia.

He said HOJO gave him the picture, but wouldn't tell him anything about her. That's surprising. Now Seph goes around asking everyone he meets if they've seen her.

Anyway, monster time. I finally get to fight as Seph! Little baby boy is so weak and pathetic compared to my way over-leveled FS trio lmao. His model is also very smol in comparison to them. Runty Seph!!! I'm gonna have to max this boi out.

After the fight, Glenn asks if Seph showed them the photo because he figured they'd die before he got to ask. Seph says no, but giggles about it. Precious angel baby boy.

Seph says that talking to the three of them must be what "having fun" is like. And that he enjoys it. Guys, I'm gonna die. I'm fucking crying. AND LUCIA PATS HIM ON THE HEAD GUYSSSSSS.

They enter the base. Seph tells them they are to eliminate all monsters and Rhadorans. He said this includes kids and old folks, rationalizing for both--SEPH'S also a kid, and the old folks could be veterans. YIKES Seph. He spouts some propaganda about this island belonging to Shinra. The boy is brainwashed.

With that said, they're keeping him pretty balanced so far. He goes between being genuinely sweet and endearing to ruthless war weapon. As he should be. I like morally gray Seph.

I attempt to navigate the base with a severely under-leveled Seph. Thanks, Square. Lots of Rhadorans and filler monsters slain. Many sections have annoying gates you have to unlock.

This caps off with a fucking STEAMPUNK MECH weapon thing. And of course it's a somewhat hard fight so it's grinding time with Seph.

After the fight, Sephiroth runs ahead in pursuit of the Rhadorans. He tells the group they should split up in different directions. When Glenn protests Seph going off by himself, Sephiroth says it's his "cyborg instinct". So he's still sore about that brief bit of bullying. Aww.

While the trio is tangling with the Rhadorans, who shows up but fish-goblin STAMP! He keeps following the trio and tears into the fray.

The whole place starts to fall apart thanks to explosives. Our trio books it, where they find Sephiroth outside, a huge pile of Rhadoran bodies all around him.

Here we go. The emotional climax of the chapter. Sephiroth says they were trying to evacuate everyone who couldn't fight, which Seph evidently took care of. Glenn asks if this violence was necessary and Matt equally says that they could have been used as bargaining chips.

Seph says they have to kill. SURPRISINGLY, Seph managed to get hurt! The so called "kids" Glenn mentioned earlier apparently had some combat training and backstabbed Seph.

Seph says that people make assumptions about himself as well, so he tries extra hard to prove them wrong. He says that his training proved to him that he needs to be strong, smart, and ruthless in battle, a hardened heart. It's kill them before they kill you. Obviously Shinra brainwashing. But also, Sephiroth has obviously seen a LOT of trauma at this point.

To which Glenn steps towards him and gives him The Hug. It's life or death out here. But Sephiroth has nothing to prove. He only needs to show compassion.

Sephiroth sadly shakes his head and is either crying or having something close to a mini-breakdown. To which he whispers the heartbreaking finisher of all finishers: "...I'm not a cyborg."

Glenn gives him another hug while Sephiroth stands there and cries. FuCK. I'm dead. Like, absolutely gutted. Jesus christ.

Sephiroth murmurs "I never wanted to be." A cyborg, obviously. GAME CALM DOWN I CAN'T KEEP CRYING LIKE THIS.

A bit later, the trio and Seph spot the other island in the distance. Glenn says there's someone who lives there who is "kind of like" Sephiroth. There's those parallels.

We cut to a brief scene of Rosen and his dog, lighting the chimney. White smoke. Lucia points out that when all the Rhadorans are gone, it will just be Rosen by himself.

This chapter was agony. Pure, undiluted agony. Almost up there with Zack's death. Almost. It's somewhere in the top 10 FF7 tearjerkers. FUCK.

[cloudninetonine]

“If something happens to me, nothing will change. But if something happens to any of you, things will start to unravel.”

“You don’t know that.”

“I really don’t want to find out.”

———

They were stuck. They were stuck and everyone knew it, there was no option that hadn’t been covered and then swiftly turned down.

Scout turned to the group, having let out an exasperated sigh “Haven’t I proven myself capable enough?” They crossed their arms in front of themself standing up a little straighter as if a stronger stance would change anyone’s mind.

“ You have, but that’s not the issue here.” Time was the first to respond, eyebrows knit together in a stern glare. The only response he got was another huff of indignation. The eldest hero brought his hand up to pinch the bridge of his nose- hoping to alleviate the growing pressure in his head.

Wars moved a step forward pushing past Time to look Scout in the eye, they turned their head away refusing to meet his gaze.

“ You just admitted willingness to sacrifice yourself for this-“ his tone was accusatory, but the concern was not hidden. “ You do realize that, don’t you?” He turned back to the group, looking for backup. Wild just looked away, shuffling awkwardly in place. He knew saying anything now was pointless. Scout looked to him, quietly begging for him to side with them. But there was nothing, dropping their hands to their sides they gave up on the attempt to look brave.

“ I’m just saying,” Scout started again. “If one of us should stay behind. It should be me, it’s more important that you guys get through this-“

“No one's staying behind, we already decided that.” Twilight cut them off, it was clear he was not up for a compromise. Scout shot him a dirty look, opening their mouth to argue. Not getting the chance to voice their disdain before being spoken over once again.

“I say if they wanna get themselves killed that’s their choice…” everyone turned to look towards the voice, Legend, who had been trying to avoid the conversation was leaning in the stone doorway. He met Scout's eye before looking away, not wanting to think of what could happen if they did stay behind. “ They shouldn’t have come with us in the first place.”

Hyrule turned to the veteran, surprised by his words, and seemingly a bit offended. “ Why would you say something like that?” He began, trying to defend his new friend's place in the group. “ They have just a right to be here as you or I.��� Legend turned to him snapping back “ Maybe you-“ the argument started to pick up and everyone was growing more tense. Scout turned back to Time as Four tried to break up the argument in the corner, some about ‘friends not fighting’ but no one was really paying attention.

“ I’m not saying leave me here to rot, I'm just trying to help you. I'm always expecting to just stay back so why won’t you let me when I actually want to? What matters is you all get out. Just let me do this.” Time pulled his hand away from his face. After another sigh he looked around the group opening up the floor for anyone else to speak. Wind moved closer to Wild, having decided best to also not bring attention to his thoughts on the subject. The last voice spoke up finally. Sky moved from behind Scout, offering nothing but another look of concern.

“ You’re not worth less than us…” he didn’t get to finish before they stepped away. It was clear they were not getting through, and each of them knew despite Twilight's statement. Someone would have to stay behind.

————-

This is just for you to read since I promised lmao- this is just the intro portion for you, fleshed out a bit more

__________ THIS GAVE ME SUCH HEART ACHE, GOD I RELATE TO IT SO MUCH BUT IT STILL HURTS ME IUGHRIGUG

[mermaidsirennikita]

Any books with pathetic man? I love pathetic men

I also love pathetic men!

Historical:

A Lady for a Duke by Alexis Hall. Now! Gracewood has good reasons for being pathetic, but he is... not in great shape when Viola meets (technically reunites but he doesn't know ssh) him. He's like, a PTSD-ridden, depressed war veteran who's def killing the pain with alcohol. And of course, he's also super pathetic over Viola. This book has a trans heroine, and he and Viola were besties before she faked her death in the Battle of Waterloo. He initially doesn't recognize her; but when he does, it's because he recognizes her FRECKLES. Tell me that isn't both romantic and incredibly "DUDE. GET UP. GET UP MAN."

Daring and the Duke by Sarah MacLean. Ewan is basically attempting to make up for some PRETTY abhorrent behavior, and he's flopping!

Dreaming of You by Lisa Kleypas. I personally find Derek Craven very pathetic. Like, he's competent, but he's an emotional wreck. Again I say "you've had me like a drawn dog" is one of the most vivid descriptions of a boner in romance history. If someone said that to me I would marry him immediately.

Seduce Me at Sunrise by Lisa Kleypas. Oh Kev. Oh Merripen. You self-loathing mess of a man. Honestly, one of the best moments in this book is when Kev requests a sex worker right after Win comes home, and Win has decided to visit him and DOES NOT KNOW THIS, and she's wearing a hood so she shows up like "hello!" and he thinks she's that sex worker and bends her over the table, only to realize it's Win and do like a six foot jump backwards. LOSER BEHAVIOR.

Shadowheart by Laura Kinsale. Obligatory "first sex scene is noncon" warning but dude Allegreto is like... SO dramatic. Like, he's a very effective assassin and all that. But he's also like "I hate myself please beat the shit out of me during" and she... acquiesces.

The Bride Goes Rogue by Joanna Shupe. Preston Clarke does some truly pathetic groveling, and I personally love a hero who's like... pathetic AFTER we see what kind of competence he's capable of? Like, she destroys him.

Contemporary(ish):

Preferential Treatment by Heather Guerre. Not because the hero is a sub, but because he's a pathetic individual who enjoys being pathetic lol. There's a chess scene in this book that is..... so good.

All of heroes of Kings of Italy by Mila Finelli are pathetic, especially the first three. But special shoutout to Enzo D'Agostino (Mafia Madman) for being like *SIGH. SIGH. SIGH.* when Gia's not around... to the point that in a bonus scene you get his internal monologue where he's like SHE'S A SICKNESS. I LOVE HER SO MUCH and his brothers are like "he has a goldfish brain when she's not around, just let him go find her".

Aaaand Alessio Ricci in Mafia Target because he is the world's greatest sniper and he's sent in to kill this mob boss and then he sees the mob boss's son and is like "THAT. Is the hottest man I've EVER. Seen" and ruins the shot. Literally was too distracted by the hot man to do his job. (Also: Giulio being sickeningly hot saved his father's life and it is hilarious.)

New Camelot by Sierra Simone. Ash is not pathetic lol. Embry, my beautiful baby man, is DEEPLY PATHETIC and he knows it, and he hates it, and he loves it, and I LOVE HIM. Embry constantly being [belabored sigh] "you're probably wondering how I got here" in his POV chapters is one of my favorite things lmao.

Auden Guest from the Thornchapel series by Sierra Simone also deserves a callout, because though he is quite a dominant figure in a lot of ways, the amount of INSANE. SHIT. This man does and is like "is this being a good boyfriend? :)" .... deeply pathetic and desperate. (OOOOOH THERE'S A "LET'S DO A MOCK HUMAN SACRIFICE BUT SEXY" MOMENT IN THIS SERIES WHERE HE'S THE SACRIFICE. OH IT'S GOOD.)

The Master by Kresley Cole. Russian mafia book, the hero is a powerful billionaire and literally ends up staring at her through a window in the rain texting her like "WELL I HOPE YOU DO WELL ON YOUR TEST :("

Heated Rivalry by Rachel Reid. Shane and Ilya are both very pathetic over each other, even though they're super amazing athletes, even though Shane is like, a perfect player, even though Ilya is so charismatic and well-liked. I think Ilya even has a line where he calls himself pathetic because he's so in love that he's become a loser. Shane is like... very.......................... into being MANAGED lol................... and his internalized monologue is always like "here I go again, being an idiot".

Paranormal:

Dreams of a Dark Warrior by Kresley Cole. This is, uh, definitely a dark book, but so good. The hero is introduced in a previous book, and you're like omg he's so dangerous, he's so competent. Then you get in his head and it's like a) he's super depressed b) he's incredibly traumatized c) he's basically being controlled by this organization via a crippling addiction d) he's so dead to the world that he doesn't even have hookups UNTIL HE MEETS HEEEER. Super enemies to lovers. He hates what she is (or does he?). There's a really delicious moment where she's like "you can touch me" but he doesn't want her to see his bare hands because he has super bad scars from the Trauma Thing... So he has her like, naked on a countertop, blindfolded with his tie, so he can touch her without her seeing his scars. AMAZING. I'm a Declan Chase apologist. Also??? Later in the book he's trying to get Regin back and takes advice from a) Thad, a seventeen-year-old boy who calls him "DC" (DC!!!!) and b) Lothaire, who at this point hasn't slept with anyone in like 3,000 years and is, it must be said, canonically CRAZY. Declan can't talk to girls.

Lothaire by Kresley Cole. I recommend Lothaire a lot but that's because it's everything. I don't know that I've ever read a scene as vividly pathetic as Lothaire being presented with the opportunity to sleep with his only supernatural equal (superior probably lol) at that time in the series, the stunningly gorgeous Nix, leaning in, being unable to kiss her, and like punching the wall and going "SHE'S RUINED ME!!!!!" He can't sleep without Ellie, he can't think without her, he can't even think of other women, he spends his evenings inhaling her pillow lmao. Also, on another level, he's deeply into puzzles, which isn't pathetic inherently but is when you realize he's like, one of the most feared characters in this universe and is actually like. That guy. Also, there's a scene where Ellie is tanning in a bikini and he traces (like, teleporting?) back to his apartment in order to grab a pair of sunglasses to see her better from the shadows. And then offers her crucial information in exchange for her moving the top a little each time to show him more skin. LOSER.

Moonglow by Kristen Callihan. Begins with our Victorian werewolf rake man having a... dysfunction... with a woman, after which he meets the heroine, who he's besotted with. At one point they're at a tavern and someone begins singing a song about his rumored performance issues and she's like *eyebrow raise*.

A Demon's Guide to Wooing a Witch by Sarah Hawley. The hero is a demon who was the villain of the previous book, and he now has amnesia and begins the book getting his ass kicked by another demon, only for our heroine to run in and reluctantly save him. He does that thing where he's very powerful but also basically a baby, which is MY DEAL.

Fantasy:

The Winter King by C.L. Wilson. Wynter is extremely powerful, but also an extremely sad loser man who makes elaborate ice sculptures of his ENTIRE DEAD FAMILY in order to like, have them around still lmao. When the heroine finds out she's like "this is so sad and sexy of you".

[itsadragonaesthetic]

Was taught about the atom bombs in middle school in grave detail with bits of brainwashing and then never learned about it that intensely until now and uhhh just wanted to share some thoughts. (I'm actually trying to cope right now and I feel like blabbering lmao) Trigger for general discussion of the bombs, personal fears and feelings, and mentions of Nazis. Please tell me if I should add more/different tags.

I was very thoroughly brainwashed about WW2 when I was in middle school. No doubt. Full blown "it was a necessary evil" and "Americans are the heros" and "the greatest generation" all taught by an asshole boomer (no literally) who forced me to watch reconstructions of people being vaporized by the bombs (I asked to not participate and he refused).

I genuinely look back on that similarly to how my mom looks back on the similarly brutal education she got. It was traumatizing. After that I just blanked it all out of my mind for years. I got to it in high school but didn't pay much attention and the curriculum didn't go in depth as to not be opinionated or traumatize anyone being forced to read about it against their will.

I've been learning about it again over the last few days out of curiosity, prime timing with a WW2 movie being released, and because I could feel some kind of weird wound in my psyche about those bombs that I wanted to explore.

Something new that has happened is that I'm beginning to comprehend that WW2 actually happened. I was told about it when I was a fucking child as to lessen the impact of how crazy it was. To make it impossible for me to fully process and question it. To make the event sound normal. Later I knew of the horrors of the Nazis, especially cuz some idiots currently decided to bring it up into politics again. I'm not sure if I'll ever fully process any of that honestly. I learned a lot about it in high school, but nothing too crazy.

That bombing tho, and the entire situation of the US relationship with Japan... it's hard to think about. I think it's hard because of that brainwashing. Even if I say I don't like America or whatever, I have to admit that there are some patterns in there that will always need weeding simply due to my education. Ableism, racism, harmful nationalism, disconnect from other countries, all of that doesn't fix itself when you yell "fuck america".

I was initially taught with the American pride ideas. We had no choice, the Japanese were evil savages, and America is the greatest thing since sliced bread. Woo pride for our troops or whatever. I grew up and realized it was all bullshit but I had a sort of... apologist perspective on the horrors. Those people were brainwashed. Those marines thought they were doing the right thing. Those poor Americans just wanted the war to end. They didn't know what that bomb did.

But I only thought that because that's the America I choose to see in the present day. I still talk respectfully to veterans simply because I pity them, and many realized they were duped by the Iraq war propaganda. I give them respect because they didn't deserve to experience that, nor did they want to. I also generally think of Americans as ignorant. They only think these wars are justified because they've been led astray by assholes at the top who want more money. Were all just a bunch of roaches at the bottom of a barrel being swayed by the tides of our upbringing.

This was not how it was in WW2. People were victims of propaganda, but many were truly evil. I liked to imagine people felt shock and fear after the first test, but no. People cheered. People were given medals after dropping the bomb. They had the mushroom cloud and news coverage play on TV and people said "we should bomb them again". They saw survivors years after the event and laughed at their deformities. Americans whined and bitched about the war effort, then took full credit for being good humanitarians after we won. Japanese Americans were treated like less than animals.

The Nazis were just... that shit is enough to give you nightmares for sure. But that evil feels far away. It feels like it's fueled by mythical monsters and misinformed people. Maybe the bombs are only shaking me so bad because it's close to home, but hearing about those bombings makes me feel... haunted. The power of the sun, creation itself, was released and it birthed a thousand demons that still stalk every person even remotely affected. Generations down, it feels like the spirit of some lost soul is looking for someone to blame. As an American, it feels like it must be me. The fact that I knew so many kids in high school who chose the WW2 special courses that unpack those horrors and many still came out as white nationalists reminds me that WW2 wasn't even 100 years ago. The mindset that unleashed the most atrocious horrors upon the earth isn't long dead like I was taught it was. Nor is it in some far off land. I am indeed superstitious, and it makes me afraid of demons disguised as people. When they said learning about this stuff is enough to make you feel like half of a human for an afternoon, they weren't kidding.

[felassan]

Thoughts on Dark Fortress #2

(This post is under a cut due to spoilers.)

So late with this one! some stuff irl was keeping me really busy and hyper-distracting me lately, but it’s finally over now so I’m back on my bioware bullshit. :D

Overall there were a lot of beautiful or awe-inspiring scenes in this issue, and a lot of great, meaningful / poignant character interactions and moments between characters. It’s pretty impressive actually how much was able to be packed in. I posted some of my favorite panels here. also omg! the action sequences! the big reveal! the ending!! woww

cool scene-setting, panned out shot of Neromenian and behind it, the Dark Fortress, to immediately pull you back into the world and ‘where we left off’. the combination of ruined dead trees, red lights, lightning and fire/smoke is very atmospheric and hints at what’s ahead

“From this... city, if we can call it that” is a sick burn and reminds you that the Qunari are technologically more advanced than most of the rest of Thedas, from their cannons to their aqueducts

more individually distinct Qunari soldiers, sth I again appreciate

! last issue there were big ‘You haven’t seen the last of Tractus!’ vibes, naturally, but I didn’t expect him to escape by stabbing and killing the Qunari using a chair-leg..!!

the last panel on the first page of Karasten is really good. the way it’s colored, the way it’s lit, the light and shadow, the fiery backdrop, cinders floating, the details of his expression.. 👌 it also makes me think to the possible future, to DA4 when mainland Thedas may be continuing to face the entirety of the Antaam

in Vaea’s acrobatics scene on the bridge, I know rationally that she’ll be fine but couldn’t help but worry for her. again I like how they don’t shy away from showcasing Vaea’s specific abilities. also the attention to detail - you’d think some rocks are just some rocks, but it highlights the risk she’s undertaking that if she falls it’s into rough seas which could dash her against the jagged rocks :’S. Vaea, gooooo!

Fenris’ “Enterprising girl” line has big “Clever girl” meme energy :D

my heart can’t take Fran and Autumn leaning over the edge after Vaea in worry ;; or Aaron looking back in concern over his shoulder ;; or Fran’s tender reassurance ;; or Autumn’s Worried expression ;; the care and bonds which have grown between this group of characters ;;

notice Aaron starts drinking when Vaea’s away from them and they’re beginning to grow worried about her safety. the poor man’s nerves and stress levels

Fran touching the vegetation while she’s considering if she could use her magic to open the entrance from the outside is a nice touch

did Marius leap in front of Fenris and Fran there when the entrance opened?? damn, he’s quick. and the three of them look all scary and formidable here ready for combat. notice how the curve of the door and the spikes that go into the ground, and the composition of this panel, make it look like they’re standing in front of an opened dragon’s maw? ‘teeth’, a rumbling ‘roar’.. some nice foreshadowing here.

the reunion panels are so cute. Autumn’s lil tum as she jumps and Fran and Fenris’ lil smiles of relief and at Autumn’s reaction to seeing Vaea, then a rare happy beam from Aaron.. feel.. the love ;__;

red lighting in the tunnel sets a dangerous, dramatic build-up mood

👀 more info on Fenris’ past, on the specifics of the process which gave him his markings. in the panel where he says that it took a long time, his shadow on the wall behind him reminds me of the shadow of his past that has dogged him for so long :(

Fenris and Marius height difference

discussion of the process shows the power difference between blue and red lyrium. blue lyrium took a long time, red lyrium is almost instant

Autumn is such an intrepid little explorer and alert scout, tail and ears up, head forward. good girl!

“I just... worry about you, my girl”  ‧º·(˚ ˃̣̣̥⌓˂̣̣̥ )‧º·˚  I’ll be so sad if these are death flags for Aaron and he doesn’t make it out of here. also note Fran in this panel, who recently had to kill her own father and is still dealing with that, watching the strongly paternal moment between Aaron and Vaea :(

love Vaea’s faith in Aaron and her sense of humor. also I don’t know why, maybe it’s because Vaea met Sebastian, but her “Maker, no!”, although in a completely different and light-hearted context, reminds me of Sebastian’s “Maker nooo!” at the end of DA2 hh

the reference again to Hawke, who Fenris saw haunted by what they tried to do - save their mother - and couldn’t :’(. also with the shadow in this panel, here’s another person struggling with the shadow of his past qq. this is later emphasized again in Aaron when he continues to talk about his past and in the panel is a chain and manacle. smart visual metaphors, a must in the comic medium with limited space

mushroom skull 💀🍄

“It isn’t about what I’ve done. It isn’t about my failures. Or my choices. It’s about their impact�� - he’s misty-eyed here as he thinks back to Ostagar.. does this line btw seem almost meta to anyone else btw? :D it feels like a meta reference to the experience of DA players and PCs, who are always having to deal with the impacts of their choices

I wanna point out that I was right on reading issue #1, when I said “I’m positive that in panel 2 here, it’s the exact moment when he sees Cailan die” ;;

So Aaron is also a veteran of the Battle of Denerim

reference to the Hero of Ferelden - “Those were someone else’s battles”. I’m being captain obvious here but I can’t help but [heart pitter-patter] at any and all references to the HoF

I like the.. parallel? is that the word? Aaron’s stories were him trying to inspire people to make a change, or him trying to convince himself of that. and now here’s Vaea, inspiring Aaron with her words in these panels. the little guys can make a difference! in the world of Thedas, you don’t need to be a big bombastic hero or a Player Character to have an impact 

lmao Fenris right on cue. the moments of humor/light-heartedness are nice because they break up the tension and are sprinkled throughout without derailing build-up or taking away from dramatic story impact. yknow?

yeah Aaron!! leave it behind. leave it to rot with mr mushroom skull (and hey the mushroom skull was there for a reason). again tho if this is a death flag i 

Fenris straight down to business with the tactics

its cute how close Autumn has been sticking to Fran

Tessa checking in on Fran again, as she did in issue 1

Could Vaea’s “Well, shit” be an homage to Varric? :D they have met

I also wanna point out that I was right on reading issue #1, when I said “My guess is that the thing Tractus shows Marquette and Nenealeus is probably a chained up dragon or similar”

the poor dragon :’( big dragon the Qunari had in Trespasser vibes

the sword has a really cool design, kind of reminds me of something a samurai might be depicted wielding

👀 lore-drop! so ancient elven arcane warriors used lyrium-infused swords. this seems to confirm the sarcophagus is an ancient elven artifact, no? makes sense, wasn’t it said that the sarcophagus’ design was based on the architecture/outfit-design type elements of a specific faction, and that this was done intentionally? it looks kinda ancient elfy in make, right? also about the lyrium-infused swords of the arcane warriors, well well well.. remember that the Evanuris and the ancient elves mined the bodies of Titans for lyrium, for power and to use as a resource. here’s an example of that use

as I read through this portion I became increasingly concerned for my boy Shirallas.. we really are in it now aren’t we 😭

the Qunari are launching STRAIGHT-UP ROCKETS ohhhh

pretty ‘lightshow’ over the wall in the “Let’s hope the fortress is as secure as Danarius boasted” panel hh

protective older brother Fenris, impish younger sister Vaea. love that dynamic, we love to see it. sheepish and exasperated Fenris is so cute

the Bone Pit dragon fight with Hawke and co reference!

I wonder how long the dragon has been captive here, and how Danarius/Tractus was able to capture it

lore-wise what are the implications here? when Fenris’ ritual was being undertaken, the sword and the sarcophagus were bombarded with magic, fire spells. in this one they aim to have the dragon bombard it with fire-breathing. is it just fire that makes it work/powers it, or is there magic in dragonfire, in dragons? it reminds me of “Your heart beats with the old blood, as well. Where do you think it comes from? It sings of a time when dragons ruled the skies. A time before the Veil, before the mysteries were forgotten. Can you hear it?”

purple color for the dragon’s growling sounds/typeset is a great idea

lets.. goooo!!!!

Marquette is such a nerd. later on when he activates the sarcophagus he has mad scientist vibes

the dramatic reunion face-offs begin!! as the prophecy foretold!!!!1

true to form, Marius DOES have nothing to say ahahaha, even at this, his personal climax. maybe Marius dies in the next issue, but Tessa lives and gets to go back to Charter

these Venatori look almost Star Wars

Shirallas my boyy.. nooo... don’t do it 😭

ah ah ah! try casting magic with no ARMS

Francesca a beacon of blue light and goodness

the splash combat page is masterful. everyone playing a part, so much going on, everything happening at once. a thing that sticks out to me about it is Aaron’s outstretched hand and alarm as he watches Fran fall 

Autumn with her lil hackles raised

“The Venatori have returned” dun dun dunn

goodbye Shirallas 😭😭😭

the composition of the second to last page with triangle/diamond-shaped panels and the framing of dragon wings is awesome

the Dread Wolf rises, “the Tevinter Imperium will rise again”.. on-point on-point cohesion

there he is, the red wraith

Super Saiyan Shirallas

what a note to end an issue on

wow wow wow!!

and separate to the above, some speculation based on the cover of Issue 3: the piece of metal looks like a broken collar coming off Shirallas, like the one there was on the cover of Issue 2 coming off the dragon. also he’s all bulky now with draconic talons/claws (reminds me of in-world legends of Reavers who dug too deep of their own power after drinking dragon blood and whose bodies consequently began to manifest subtle reptilian traits actually). I’ll be interested to see what results of this allusion between Shirallas and the dragon!!

[anxiousbean33]

What’s the AU? -Chandelier (don’t worry about me being off anon)

i am annoyed rn i just fully answered this and then my computer decided to shut down so i need to redo this ._.

so basically is called The Black sails, has nothing to do with the movie tv show whatever i just thought it was a cool name lmao, and so shameless self promo i have the prolouge and the first chapter complete idk if you have read it yet tho

heres the main gist of the story tho

People can have something they wear that gives them their magic, these are called gems. Most everyone has a different ability but some people can have the same things. When they work with their magic more they can get stronger and be able to do more things with it. If you get strong enough you can use your own energy to use the magic and not the gems energy, although when you do this it is extremely dangerous as it can easily kill you. When you turn 5-7 you get your gem, and some people don't get gems. A thing that is popular among veterans and heroes is that they give their gems to a person they trust, so the other chosen when they go back to war. There is also shifters and hybrids, Kristin is a shifter and can shift between a human and a crow without needing her gem, and Phil is a bird hybrid what type idk but he has wings. Also gems can have a hidden verision so they can be blank when using magic many people use this as to not get theirs stolen.

but that the basics of it

[narkinafive]

this one’s a doozy

(i feel like i should have done sth like this for the prequels/the clone wars but oh well. i'll get around to it eventually! maybe! gotta do something while waiting for ix right lol)

oh, rebels. rebels rebels rebels. i know it's probably unbelievable, but i was so gutted by the clone wars cancellation that i really Did Not Like rebels at. it took... idk about two years for me to give it a real chance (and i was still deep in a previous fandom hole, so i didn't really get into it until like. the start of s4) (if you can guess what fandom it was you get a cookie) i am so glad i tried it again.

of course, ezra bridger is, was, will always be my favorite boy. i really did not expect him to waltz away with my heart! anakin has always been my favorite (and he still is, tbh), bc that kind of character and that kind of arc is so on brand for me, like. i LOVE my dark tragic messiah demigods, i really really do!!! but then this doofy dumbass kid with big blue eyes and a big blue heart and his many cat friends just punched me in the gut!

it's been a year and i've had time to digest the whole package. let me preface by saying that rebels is absolutely 100% perfect and my favorite piece of expanded sw media by a LONG mile. NOW. that doesn't mean that there weren't things i didn't like (going under a cut!)

many times, it tried too hard to tie into the greater saga - bringing in palpatine, the wbw, all the saga cameo characters, like... some of them worked better than others. the r2d2 and c3po cameos were the worst, w obi wan coming in at a close second. the best saga character cameo was definitely mon mothma (and bail). i really liked leia's episode, but. idk. it still felt a little shoehorn-y

i wish ezra's descent into the dark side had been more ... present? he gets some great, great moments. but it's kind of sudden (i've touched on this before so i won't keep going)

someone else has brought this up (and i ................. do not remember who sdfkjlsdfjlk) but pushing aside the Great Rivalry of thrawn and hera for the force stuff is... idk. that's a whole other thing

now i love the force shit. like i LOVE it. but i think rebels might have been stronger if it focused less on force shit and more on the early war effort, in the same vein as rogue one. i know it'd be more difficult to fill out four seasons rather than one movie, but as it got into s4 and closer and closer to episode iv... idk, put the force shit at the beginning of the season? idk. i really love how they did it, but... idk! it's complicated

oh, and speaking of complicated - maul. i love what they did with him, i love this sad garbage pile and watching him recreate his trauma onto others as a way of dealing with it... but i think it was a weird choice. maul is so... idk, grimdark? for such a lovely sweet show

kallus going to lira san better be bc he's being tried for war crimes lmao

sabine staying on lothal is... a choice. not one i hate. but i still don't quite understand it

and my biggest gripe, ironically one of my favorite parts of the show: ahsoka lives.

dont' get me wrong; i was so happy that ahsoka lived, i nearly threw my computer across the room when ezra yoinked her into the spacetime continuum. i am a diehard ahsoka fan and i will fight somebody to defend her honor. THAT SAID. the narrative of ahsoka going down at the hands of her former master? as he desperately tries to erase every part of his former identity? the great commander tano, clone wars veteran, an early casualty of the rebel alliance? it's so good. it's SO good. having her story end there would have been just some phenomenal shit. just superbly poetic. i'm glad she's alive! and the emotional impact is still the same, even with her coming back, but my god.

now. the things i love.

the character arcs. all of them. ezra bridger, war orphan, street thief, cast out by his people, finding he is stronger than he ever thought could be possible, giving his life for his people because he forgives them, and because it's the right thing to do. kanan jarrus, jedi knight, reclaiming his heritage and his jedi legacy (and yes, watching him die still hurt just as much as the first time aroundd) (and also, thanks to @aspiringwarriorlibrarian and @greatlakesrebel for pointing out many many many things, but first and foremost tonight, that dume the wolf was of course voiced by fpj) (i’m slow ok shut up). hera syndulla, who unfortunately had to learn the hard way how to balance love and war so she didn't become her father, pushing away everyone she loved for the greater cause. zeb orrelios, finding his people, learning he's not the last of his kind, leading the refugees to their ancestral home. sabine wren, forgiving herself and freeing her planet from oppression. and not just the hero arcs - the villain arcs, too!!!! darth maul's single minded obsession that kept him alive for 30 years ending in a 3-hit fight on a backwater planet because he just couldn't sustain that hate for so long. all of thrawn's cleverness couldn't predict the force. i don't have an issue with a single one of these!

THE FORCE (TM)!!!! there is so much delicious crunchy force nonsense, i could DROWN in it

among my many, many issues w the old EU, one of them was demystifying the force, quantifying and trying to label it too much. some things were quantified bc they needed to be (the holocrons, the sith code, etc) but most of it was kept as vague and nebulous as possible, which is GOOD. when it comes to mystical magic, less explanation is mostly always more

i love that we don't have clear cut answers for the loth wolves and the lothal temple, i could ponder that shit for WEEKS and never get bored

it does feel like a mostly self contained story. "been there made history" can get overused very easily (see: hbo rome) but rebels used it just enough to fit it into the larger saga

having rex survive both the clone wars AND the galactic civil war??? fuck yeah

kanan and ezra. kanan and ezra. there is so much i could say about kanan and ezra. it's everything to me. war vet finds plucky young orphan and adopts him? sign me tf up!! their relationship as it grows from mentor/mentee to peers is really really well done

and speaking of growth, ezra and sabine going from obvious romantic interest to battle forged siblings is not something that i was expecting but is definitely one of the best parts of the show

kevin has some really incredible tracks in this show: top of the list is 100% kanan's end credits, followed closely by it's over now. wow

and speaking of, the entirety of the last ten minutes of twilight of the apprentice deserves its own bullet. that shit is right up there with vader v luke round 2

the planet designs, mostly malachor and lothal, but when hera and sabine launch the dome, and the lothal sky suddenly turns to blue as the pollution is leeched out and destroyed... that shit is breathtaking

and so much more. like so much

this show holds such a special place in my heart :") now if only dave could bring back my son... like. PLEASE 

see you all in rogue one!

[elvhenahhh]

Fic blurb

This fic is set in a world where my Mahariel joined the Inquisition as a companion. It started out as a banter scene between Mahariel and Iron Bull where she teases him about Dorian, but it became this kind of sprawling, introspective thing???? Anyway, it’s still a work in progress, but I’m sending a portion out in the void anyway. Any feedback is appreciated lmao  

When he first found out that the Inquisitor was related to the Hero of Ferelden and that she was coming to aid them at his request, Bull was definitely intrigued. The Hero of Ferelden united a country on the brink of civil war, defeated a fucking archdemon, and most incredibly, lived to tell the tale of it all herself! While Bull wasn't the type to write it all off as a fluke, he was still interested in seeing the kind of person who would be able to do all those things within a single year.

Turns out, all of Warden-Commander Soufei “Just Call Me Mahariel” Mahariel could be boiled down to three defining character traits.

One: A bleak but realistic view of what the world is and her place within it.

Two: A steadfast, unrelenting determination to do what is right.

And three: A subtle, almost insidious charisma.

The one thing that surprised the Bull was how affectionate the Hero of Ferelden could be. Dorian often said that a face like his deserved to be carved in marble, and most of the time, Mahariel's face truly appeared to be made of the stuff. She seemed to look upon everything, from scouting reports to beautiful, anonymous bouquets, with the same unchanging expression.

And yet.

During their brief moments of respite at Skyhold, Mahariel was often seen in the company of her fellow Fifth Blight veterans. She was the only person who could coax the Inquisition's spymaster into leaving her tower of crows and spies. The guards have yet to become used to seeing the Hero of Ferelden and Sister Nightingale stroll around the fort, arms entwined and heads bent together like gossiping school girls. Based on the laughter they often shared and the knowing glances they sometimes shot at passers-by, perhaps “gossiping” was an accurate descriptor for their liaisons together.

Other days, she could be found in the gardens in the company of the equally beautiful and equally enigmatic Morrigan. Those visits were spent in one of two very different but equally intriguing ways. Sometimes, the two women would sit close together on a bench, legs crossed, bodies turned inward. Unlike the walks with Leliana, no attention was paid to the world around them, other than sharp glares to ensure no one wandered too close or lingered too long near the pair. It wasn't uncommon to see the witch conjure dark lights between her fingertips which would then leap to the warden's willing, outstretched hand. Some onlookers even began to whisper that perhaps the Hero of Ferelden was a mage all along, thus allowing her to survive her slaying of the archdemon. It definitely made the Inquisitor's more... devout followers uncomfortable, seeing an apostate and a well-known mage-supporter openly wielding magic like that, especially when the women's only response to complaints were to stare the complainant down until they walked away. Mother Giselle refused to leave the garden entirely, but she quickly learned to retreat to a particular corner when she saw the elvhen woman passing by.

(She wasn't by the way. The Iron Bull had Dalish check. And Dorian. “There is as much magic in her as there is water in a piece of rock,” he had said as he absently pet at Bull's chest. Bull, for his part, just grunted an affirmation, too concentrated in bathing in the afterglow as it were. At least until Dorian's fingers turned wicked and pinched a nipple. “I would have told you sooner if someone hadn't distracted me.” Bull groaned then chuckled, grabbing the offending hand, and well... Distractions.)

[everbrilliantheartbreaker]

Also was tagged by the wonderful @kmaknation <3

1. What was your very first anime ever? Have you ever finished it?

Naruto. Lmao I’m so original. Um I finished the manga but no way have I finished the anime. 

2. What’s the longest anime series you’ve ever watched?

Fricking One Piece omg. Currently sitting at 816 episodes and no end in sight, but I love it to death so you won’t catch me complaining. Also I haven’t actually watched all of it. Just a very large chunk lol

3. Do you listen to music or anything while working/writing/drawing? What is it or why not?

If I’m drawing/working I’ll listen to whatever I’m into at the moment. But if I’m trying to write usually I’ll listen to kpop or anime/Japanese music so I don’t get as distracted singing along to it (bcus I don’t know the words as well lol).

4. Who is your most hated pairing? The never-gonna-happen-paring(NGHP)?

Oh geez. Elv u tryin to get me in a fight with somebody lol

I hate just about any pairing that is a kid/teen with an adult. Like a few years’ gap is one thing but like a full-grown with a teen, even a legal teen just creeps me out. Pretty much any incest ship as well, obviously. So for example pretty much any Attack on Titan pairing that has the kids with the veterans, or certain ships from Vampire Knight (with the exception of one that I didn’t realize was incest until after I started hardcore shipping it and finished the manga and I’m still mad omg). Idk I know I got some hardcore NOTPs but I can’t think of most of them rn ugh. Ok I’ll just say it tho I hated Kaname/Yuki from Vampire Knight there we all happy now? Ill hit u up if I remember the others lol

5. What anime/manga did you first draw/write for?

Narutooo. Except I never actually finished or published any of those fics so idk if that counts haha.

6. Subtitles or dubbed anime?

Usually subtitles, although there are a very few where I can’t stand the Japanese voicing and gotta watch the dub to save my sanity XD

7. What anime/video game/manga world would you not mind living in? One that you would never in a million years go to?

Oh geez too many choices options here. Okay you’re getting one of all if I can think of them lol.

Anime/manga/video game world I would like to go to:

Haikyuu!!

My Hero Academia

Idk man I don’t actually play a lot of different video games I just play a bunch from the same half a dozen or less series um. Idk I’d like to say Darksiders just cause those worlds are rad but also I would die like 20 minutes in so um. That would not be a good idea. But also it would be awesome.

Anime/manga/video game world I would not like to go to:

Attack on Titan

Zodiac Wars 

The Evil Within

8. Do you ever use song lyrics in actual conversation? What song?

AHAHA. Yes. I frequently make references to Kesha songs. Um “Tik Tok” (”Party don’t start til I walk in”, obvs) and a couple others but I can’t think of them rn...also I frequently make references to that song line “Haven’t you people ever heard of closing the *coughs* goshdarn door” (sorry Elv no swears this time haha)

9. What’s your worst/funniest injury story?

The worst one is the one where I was in a really bad bike crash and split my face open really bad. It took ages to heal omg I was so miserable. I can’t really think of any funny ones rn but I’ll hit u up if I think of anything.

10. Who are your top three Voice Actors?

Khary Payton

I’ve watched a couple shows that he voices in and he plays a lot of neat black/black-coded characters but lbr here the biggest reason I like him is because he voices my fave Young Justice character Aqualad so uh yeah. Also funny story he also apparently voices Aqualad’s father which must have been both amusing and awkward bcus a) they share a lot of scenes in s2 and b) they end up fighting so he had to argue with himself like that must’ve been entertaining 

Kevin Michael Richardson

Legit my favorite voice actor ever omg. One of the few I can almost always pick out even tho i.d.ing vcs ain’t my greatest skill. Voices Martian Manhunter (one of my fave superheroes) in Young Justice. Plays tons of other big bads and just bigs like. Is it a big tough guy with a deep voice in an action TV show? It’s probably KMR. He plays in tons of shows I love, Transformers stuff and tons of DC superhero stuff and Thundercats...Star Wars and Avatar the Last Airbender too apparently. This guy is in everythiiing. Fave voice actor forever honestly he’s sooo good.

Fff I almost couldn’t think of anyone else but then. How could I forget wow

Liam O’Brien

A fave vc since before I really paid attention to that kind of stuff because he voices absolutely my favorite Naruto character ever, Gaara. He’s done a bunch of other big stuff I enjoy too like Transformers, Bleach, AND OMG. Kay I went through their IMDB pages to do this part and omg. He also plays War from Darksiders aka my favorite video game franchise ever how did I forget that. Did I even know. Anyways. He’s played in tons of other big video game and anime franchises too but honestly whenever I hear his name my only thought “hey that’s the guy who plays Gaara!” Also he’s really funny, too.

[vardasvapors]

gurguliare replied to your post:              Right. Any headcanons on the edain in the war of...                

   i always think about the fact that the generation that founded numenor would have been people born like, simultaneously in the middle of the Worst War and also ‘under the protection’ of the valar’s host—this is the closest humans GET to having elf-like contact with the valar, even though presumably we’re to assume there was a minimum of actual interaction, just… proximity……. no wonder the shadow of THAT is what hangs over numenor, it’s not just automatically   

   following the peremptory chasing-after-the-gods pattern for Mythical reasons    

YEAH definitely!!! the whole thing with the numenoreans’ huge thing for the elves and valar and god and the gift of men etc doesn’t seem to have its root in any of the events of the silmarillion before earendil & the war of wrath imo...it’s the topsy-turvyness of this period plus its generation-long length...and one could see how it would become divorced from context and turn into traditions that they no longer relate to very well after many generations of a totally different life

although....I think since the edain stuck around in ME for 32 years after the war before elros sailed with the first wave of ships (i presume there was a balancing-act going on there, between ‘want to gather and ship over as many ppl as possible right off the bat’...or maybe they weren’t sure yet if any more could come afterwards at all...and ‘want to male sure the veterans of the war themselves get their peace and healing before they die of old age’) it would mostly be the people who were youngish right during the huge massive battle at the end, with ancalagon etc...? or is that what you meant!

simaethae replied to your post “Right. Any headcanons on the edain in the war of wrath?”     

  aaaaaa, yeah, these people who've spent their entire lives trapped in someone else's war... i was going to say you don't get any edain heroes in the war of wrath, but no wonder they imprint on earendil and his kids so hard?                    

Eeeeeee!!! :) I agree totally (no surprise lmao!) Yeah, though I feel like by that time, it had kind of become their war as well. But then otoh i think...yeah, some distinct strains of a ‘we weren’t even supposed to BE HERE’ sort of mentality as well. And the way numenor is framed -- in the Appendices it’s like “as a reward for their sufferings in the cause against morgoth, the valar gave the edain a land away from the dangers of ME.” And the whole Land of Gift thing. It seems very ‘we’re sorry. you didn’t deserve this. you deserve better. here’s restitution and and a do-over and second chances’ sort of a thing. anyway yeah god the passage about earendil fighting ancalagon is amaze and has such a edain-pov feel imo <3

gurguliare replied to your post:                   Right. Any headcanons on the edain in the war of...                

   also the relationship with the tol eressea elves initially being the friends and allies they were JUST FIGHTING ALONGSIDE in the war, however ineffectually, and who they may also have grown up among        aww… fuck… veteran reunions in early numenor this is upsetting me now  

IKR??? :) :) :)

though ALSO...a lot of the tol eressea elves would be newly-returned exiles who didn’t fight, and would be strangers to the numenoreans, but like, a little the elf-equivalent of the numenoreans in terms of leaving ME, but with a completely different sort of status, like they were pardoned and allowed back onto a proto-aman halfway-house island in spite of all the stuff they did, and being in the doghouse. whereas the numenoreans are rewarded and esteemed and stuff. idk the tol eressea elves helping the numenoreans out and gardening for them and giving them stuff always felt a little like a mass-apology on the part of the ex-exiles as well, for sucking their ancestors into the aforementioned doom and war, like simaethae saidbut anyway yeah...veteran reunions <333 and bridging the gaps in lifespans or communicating “what happened over there?” back and forth with storytelling first-hand accounts <333333

[brie-n-kat-write]

Freedom Part 4 (Greaser!Peter Parker x Reader AU)

Request: hi doll i was wondering if i could request a kinda greaser!peter parker au? like he saves you from your dick boyfriend and idk fluffy shit lmao sorry if this prompt sucks

AN: WOW! We have come really far and there is still so much to do! Thank you to all the readers and followers, I love writing for you all! I hope you like this one. As always let me know what you like, what you don't, and what you would like to see in the future!

MASTERLIST

- Written by Kat - 

Your father had always told you that motorcycles were death traps, and those who rode them were just as dangerous; both were to be avoided. But the hum of the bike under you, the air rushing around you, the boy pressed against you, it was intoxicating. Being this exposed and so close to danger was thrilling, filling you with and emotion you had never felt before. It was addicting.

Buildings and street signs blurred together as Peter sped through the city. You clung to his back, your cheek pressed against his shoulder, your arms wound tightly around his waist. You could feel his heartbeat next to yours, which was rapid and excited, pounding against your ribs. Whenever he would make a sharp turn, your arms would tighten, fearing that you would fall from the bike. But every time, his hand would reach back to grip your thigh, reassuring you, while at the same time making your heart beat faster for an entirely different reason.

When Peter finally stopped  it took you a moment to realize you were at the outskirts of the city. The hill he stopped on was surrounded by overgrown weeds and wildflowers. You could see the Hudson river glimmering in the midday sun, a tree was perched at the edge of a drop off, its roots dangling over the abandoned scrap yard beneath, a picnic table sat under its low hanging branches. Cutting the engine, Peter removed his helmet hanging it over the handlebars, before stepping off the bike. Turning to face you, he unclasped your helmet, his eyes caught on your hair. His lips twitched upward, struggling to contain his laughter.

“Your hair's’ a little…” he gestured around his head to imitate your messy hair. Your eyes widened, rushing to fix your mused hair. Before you could attempt to tame your hair, Peter caught your hands, his smile growing.

“No, it's fine.” he gently brushed a strand behind your ear. “I like your hair.” he mumbled, his fingers tracing through your hair. Butterflies fluttered through your stomach. The way he was looking at you made you feel dizzy. Pulling his hand away, he cleared his throat, a light pink painting the tips of his ears. You couldn't explain why, but as his hands moved to your waist to help you off the bike, you placed your fingers over his, stopping him from moving away. His gaze locked on yours, his eyes held the type of kindness that some would search centuries to find, and you felt grateful to those eyes.

“Thank you.” You said, keeping your eyes locked on his. You weren't entirely sure what you were thanking him for, but it needed to be said. You felt stupid for putting so much weight into the words when he had just helped you off the bike, but it wasn't just for that, it was for everything he had done for you. His eyes searched yours, and for a moment something flashed through them, something indescribable, and it set your skin ablaze. Then, for an instant, you felt his hands tighten on your waist, but as soon as you felt it, they were gone. He gently pulled his hands from under yours, a sheepish smile masking his face.

“No problem doll.” He gently took your hand and pulled you towards the edge of the drop off. “I like to come here when I feel stressed. When it feels like the world is pressing down on my shoulders, it’s nice to just stop and count the boats.” As he looked out over the bay, the smile on his face looked out of place with the sadness in his eyes. You wondered what was going on in his mind, how could someone so young have that kind of sadness in their eyes, the type of sadness that shows through the smiles of war heros and veterans.

Turning your gaze back to the water, it was easy to see why he liked to come here. The sun reflected off the water, casting a bright light across the city front, making it look shiny. The wind blew off the water, catching your hair, sending it dancing around your head. Taking a step closer, you peered down at the twisted scrap metal below. You felt your pulse pound in your neck and for a moment you wondered what would happen if you jumped. Just stepping forward falling into the open air, the wind rushing over your body as you fell, watching the glistening water disappear. The feeling was similar to what you felt on the motorcycle, but as you leaned further out, you felt Peter’s hand tighten around yours, snapping you back to reality. For a moment you saw yourself in his eyes, you saw what he saw, and it didn't look good. It looked like a rich girl, standing on a cliff, too close to the edge, looking for a way out, looking down. Coming back to your senses, you took a step back, trying to calm your racing heart. Looking back at Peter, you couldn't help but laugh at yourself.

“Sorry, lost my mind for a sec there.” You chuckled. Peter continued to search your face, and you wondered what he was looking for.

“(Y/N), are you happy?” It was a simple question but it caught you off guard. Were you happy? You had everything you had ever wanted; you had a house, food, clothes, why shouldn't you be happy? But in your heart you felt the weight of your family’s eyes, their standards and expectations tied around your ankles, drowning you, making your blood run cold.

“I don’t know.” You answered honestly. Your eyes turned back to the bay, and you focused on the glistening water, the wind gently rustling the leaves of the tree whose shadows danced across the ground, and on the feeling of Peter’s hand around yours, and once again your heart felt warm. Your lips twitched upward again as you looked back to Peter. “But, I think maybe I could be.” Peter’s face brightened at your words, flashing you a dazzling smile. Something pulled at your heart at the sight of his smile, how had you gone so long without it, when the world seemed so dull without it.

“I’m sorry.” you blurted out without thinking, Peter tilted his head in confusion. “I mean I’m sorry it took you beating the shit out of someone for me to meet you officially.” It sounded silly, but you truly regretted not knowing him sooner, and wondered if you had known him, if things would have been different. Peter simply laughed in response pulling you over to the picnic table allowing you to sit on the tabletop while he stood in front of you, his thumb gently tracing over your fingers.

“Don't be sorry. If I’m honest, I was always too scared to talk to you.” He admitted, his gaze focused on your hands, refusing to meet your eyes. Your anger flared for a moment, thinking of all the times Jake had ushered you under his arm any time Peter was around.

“Because of Jake.” It was more of a statement than a question, the irritation in your voice unmistakeable.

“No, it wasn’t because of Jake…” he paused, running a hand through his hair, glancing up at you sheepishly. “It was because you were so classy and beautiful, I thought that someone like you would never give a guy like me the time of day.” Your chest tightened at his words. You hated to admit it, but it was true. Before yesterday, Peter was an alien, seemingly from a different planet, his world so different from your own. Leaning forward, you wrapped your arms around his shoulders, pulling him closer to hug him properly. Peter only hesitated for an instant, then his arms were around your waist, bowing his head slightly to nuzzle into the crook of your neck.

He smelt like lavender and soap. His breath tickled your neck, as he held you tightly.

“I hope you don't mind talking to me now.” You mumbled into his shoulder. You felt Peter’s shoulders shake as he pulled away gently tucking another strand of unruly hair behind your ear.

“I don't think I could ever go back to not talking to you, doll.” He chuckled. It was impossible not to smile along with him. You suddenly became aware of the position you both were in; he stood between your legs as you sat on the picnic table, your arms wound around his shoulders, and his wrapped loosely around your waist. In any other circumstance, you would have pushed him away, apologizing for your inappropriate manners. But the look in his eyes stopped you, they watched you intently, sparkling with enthusiasm, it was making it hard to breath.

Just as you were about to speak, the sound of a roaring engine cut you off. Both of you looked towards the road at the base of the hill, and your heart sank at the sight of the familiar Buick. The car sped up the winding road heading straight for them.

“Jake.” You heard Peter growl next to you, his fingers tightening on your hips. You glanced at his face, it had transformed into a harsh grimace, his eyes cold and piercing. Your blood turned to ice as you watched the car pull to a stop down the road. Jake stepped out of the car, looking worse for ware, followed by the rest of his goons.

“If anything happens, run to the bike as fast as you can, don’t wait for me.” Peter whispered leaning forward to slip the keys into your jacket pocket while placing a soft kiss on your cheek. “Don’t worry, I’ve got that Parker luck.” your heart was beating too fast to laugh at his joke. Pulling back he flashed you a wink before taking a step back to face Jake, keeping one arm around your waist.

As Jake got closer, you saw the extent of his injuries, his bloodshot eyes were rimmed by big purple rings, spreading over his nose. The small bandages on his face doing little to hide the damage. You swallowed you panic and pushed down the desire to grab Peter’s hand and run, instead deciding to trust Peter and whatever he was planning.

Jake and his gang came to a stop in front of the two you. His eyes landed on Peter's arm around you, anger flashing through them as the turned his glare back to Peter.

“We have unfinished business Parker.”

This couldn’t be good.

AN: OH SHIT!!! IT’S ABOUT TO GO DOWN! Hope you all like it! Requests are OPEN!

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