#some people are in his tag every damn day. multiple times probably i just don't scrowl that far back lol

[laufire]

speaking as someone who makes everything about jason todd lately, some of you could stand to hear that not everything has to be about jason todd... if you dislike the guy, I promise you don't have to mention him in every post you make about the characters you supposedly care about... you can *gasp* make posts about the things you enjoy about THEM!!! if there's any you can not link back to jason, that is. he's living rent free in your mind and that has to be so fucking exhausting lmao.

[mikalara-dracula]

❣️ The type of girl the Sakamakis want to spend the rest of their lives with—

Warning: 18+ content below; don't read if you're a minor and aren't comfortable with this topic and slight NSFW. This is a fictional work and should not be taken seriously.

Caution: Unfortunately, Tumblr has a history of admins quarreling over completing carbon copy asks due to users sending the same request(s) to multiple admins, thus, resulting in unintentional plagiarism. With this, please DO NOT send the same request to multiple blogs as it can cause unintended plagiarism discord to other blogs across Tumblr. The word “plagiarism” stems from the early 17th-century Latin word, “plagiarius,” meaning “kidnapper.” So please, do not send in the same request to multiple blogs and make admins appear to be “kidnapping” other people’s work when it isn’t their intention. If this is to occur with any of my posts, please contact me so we can work something out.

This request is a re-upload bc tumblr deleted my post... wtf.

Tagging: @liannelara-dracula

- Shu -

❣️ When Shu was a kid, Beatrix always told him that he’d have to marry a girl his father grants him.

❣️ She probably implemented the toxic belief into him that he’d have to marry a docile girl who always listens to him.

❣️ Since Beatrix always kept reminding him that he would be married one day, he sometimes wondered what that would be like as a child since he was curious.

❣️ But as we know, after a bunch of childhood trauma, he got to the point of not caring about anything, so marriage was the last thing on his mind.

❣️ He never even focused on an ideal type, and didn’t ever think about how he could come across someone he’d want as a lover.

❣️ So, he’d probably meet his partner in a very unexpected way and not in a typical setting.

❣️ Shu’s seen it all throughout the centuries and knows when a girl is interested in him—cliché stuff is just a turn off, and so are suitresses and girls who have obvious interest in him.

❣️ Karl has probably tried to hook him up with different suitresses throughout the centuries, but he’s probably put off marriage so many times that it seems impossible to get him hitched.

❣️ He’s just not interested in matchmaking and makes a game out of it every damn time. He once made everyone think he was actually going to pick one of the suitresses Karl presented, but in the end, he called it off and said he wasn’t satisfied nor ready to make his choice.

❣️ Beatrix grew angry every time he’d reject the girls offered to him, but Karl always reassured her that it would happen, it would just take some time. I see that Karl’s just more patient when it comes to this—afterall, he probably took his time when it came to picking three wives, but that’s none of my business lmao.

❣️ Despite suitresses, there have been other women that Shu's 'dated' or 'courted' (for the older days sake), but it was never enough to keep him interested, or it was just a fling.

❣️ Anyways, going back to the topic, Shu is mainly interested in a girl that catches him off guard, especially when he first meets her.

❣️ If he meets a girl that isn’t interested in him at all, and even flat-up dislikes him, he’s honestly into that.

❣️ And as an added bonus, if she’s mean to him, it’s a turn-on. He’d honestly find it to amusing if he kept meeting her coincidentally at school. He’d treat it like a game, and would love to annoy her to see what smart remarks she’d give—he just loves the tension.

❣️ So, girls with a smart mouth are his thing—he just finds it amusing on a girl, especially since he and his brothers are from times where girls had to hold their tongues. So a sweet, docile girl, just ain’t gonna cut it.

❣️ A girl who surprises him by wearing lingerie to bed from time to time, hence my post about it here.

❣️ Wants a girl who will stroke or ruffle his hair to lull him to sleep. He really enjoys this. And if he’s resting his head in his s/o’s lap while being stroked in such a manner, it’s just heaven to him.

❣️ If a girl babies him, he’s all for it since he’s just a man-child.

❣️ Cooking his favorite food, making him snacks, he really appreciates it even though he’d never admit, at least not easily.

❣️ And if a girl feeds it to him, it only turns him on, plus it gives him the perfect excuse to bite her fingers and have a small taste of her blood.

❣️ A girl that will lay down next to him when he’s sleeping or resting, or allow him to rest his head on her shoulder when sitting next to him.

❣️ Enjoys forehead kisses or even if a girl places a kiss in his hair.

❣️ Also loves kisses on cheeks. If by any chance she kisses his cheek unexpectedly, he’ll never let her live it down and will tease her endlessly about provoking him.

❣️ A girl who defies or blushes at his teasing, he just loves it and only makes him continue.

❣️ Girls that don’t mind keeping him warm by skin-to-skin contact.

❣️ One who doesn’t mind making out with him on the couch, and if it’s in front of his brothers—Reiji especially—Shu’s all for it and thrives on it, and only intensifies the moment to make whatever audience he has extra annoyed.

❣️ Girls with thick thighs and ass—like this is a die hard for him since he likes to grab/clutch both parts.

❣️ Is into girls who will allow him to record their moans when he’s getting intimate with them and listen to those lewd tracks on an endless loop on his MP3 player.

❣️ A girl who has a dominate side. Shu doesn’t mind being submissive every once in a while, but he leans more towards the dominate side. So a girl who can do both, but lean more towards the submissive side is his type.

❣️ Although outside the bedroom, he likes a girl that takes the lead in the relationship. He finds it amusing in all honesty.

❣️ Despite his laziness, he can be quite passionate with a girl he loves, so he definitely wants an s/o that will return the passion just as equally.

❣️ A girl that likes laying in bed naked with him until morning, especially after sex, is his Achille’s heel.

❣️ And speaking of sex, he’s definitly into that after sex talk, and if you lay there naked in his arms, he’s all for it.

❣️ So with this, Shu secretly hopes that Reiji will walk in on him and his s/o in bed sometime, better yet in the actual act so he can rub it in. After all, as I’ve mentioned in other posts about Shu, he lives for the risk of getting caught.

❣️ Oh, and bare in mind that Shu goes to bed in his underwear sometimes (this is canon!).

❣️ (In one of the game routes, Yui went to go wake him up for school and he was in that state since he asked her to dress him.)

❣️ So because he sometimes goes to bed this way, he’s into a girl who won’t mind dressing him. He’ll tease her endlessly about it and won’t let her live it down.

❣️ Girls that like being kissed when no one’s looking—he finds this really amusing, especially if he can kiss his lover’s shoulders or neck. And if they react in a way that sounds or looks lewd to him, he’s even more amused. ;))))

❣️ As the heir, he has to attend lots of events his father forces onto him, and that includes balls.

❣️ So, he’s into a girl that’s into ditching the ball and going into a secluded, closed off room with him for a bit of intimacy before going back out to face all the guests again.

❣️ And if she forgets to fix her hair and comes out looking like a mess that’s been under the touch of Mr. Heir, he’s all for it and will send her seductive stares from afar even if he’s busy conversing with other noblemen.

❣️ Just being able to sit on a bench with his lover is enough for him when it comes to quality time—he does’t really care for fancy dates.

❣️ Getting him out in public is hard and quite rare since he doesn’t have the energy to do much, so if his s/o can drag his ass out of the house, he’s actually quite happy despite him complaining that it’s a pain to go out.

❣️ Secretly, he actually likes the fact that someone is putting so much effort into making him move and not calling him a good-for-nothing like Reiji does while doing so.

❣️ A girl who likes to go on walks. He’s not the biggest fan of walking but if it’s with his s/o, he doesn’t mind it.

❣️ And here, he’ll decide to get lively and decide to pick up his lover in his arms and spin her around out of nowhere. It’s really so he can hear her laugh since the cheerful sound is literal music to his ears.

❣️ It is canon that he likes going to concerts involving classical music or orchestras, so you can best bet he wants a girl that will appreciate going to places like this with him.

❣️ She doesn’t have to have a love for classical music like he does, but her having an appreciation for it is something he deeply appreciates.

❣️ That way if he decides to take his lover to a classical music concert, he doesn’t have be concerned about her being bored. Appreciation is something he rarely gets since Reiji’s constantly calling him useless, so a girl that appreciates these dates is something he cherishes.

❣️ During an orchestra, he’s into a girl that will kiss his cheek or pull him in for a kiss in the dark while the music plays.

❣️ And of course, you can bet he’ll tease her endlessly for provoking him and promises that she’ll be paying for it when they get home.

❣️ Girls that are willing to undress him before sex. He’ll undress the girl he loves too, but her taking his clothes off tells him she’s eager for him as well.

❣️ We all know how much Shu loves his baths, so a girl that likes to bathe rather than shower is a plus.

❣️ If a girl is into the idea of bathtub sex.

❣️ I’ve said this in another post, but I want to mention here as well. Shu’s especially into the idea of having his lover lay next to him bare while he’s still clothed in the tub since he enjoys the thrill of her being laid there naked for him. So if she’s willing to do this for him, he’s sold.

❣️ A girl that's into showing off her legs and wearing short or cropped things. And if she wears short shorts that show a bit of her ass or if they ride up and she has to adjust them, he’s all for it and will tease her relentlessly.

❣️ A girl that will give him the most amusing reactions when he’s acting like the perv we all know he is. For example, if he sees that his s/o is really into a movie they’re watching together, he’ll catch her off guard by lifting up her skirt, and her reaction is the key that makes him want to keep her on the edge.

❣️ Shu’s into giving his girl hickies, so if she tries to cover them up he’s beyond amused.

❣️ If his girl allows him to use her as a body pillow, and if she allows him to lay his head on her chest, it’s utter heaven to him.

❣️ A girl that doesn’t mind being teased under the table, and what I mean is him running his foot up and down his lover’s leg and/or attempting to get their skirt to go up so he can see her panties.

❣️ Likes it if his girl initiates kisses, it really riles him up.

❣️ Girls that wear dresses or skirts with high slits.

❣️ Or if she wears jeans that have rips where the thigh or ass area is.

❣️ Girls that tie their long shirts into knots about their waistlines, and if they pair this look up with short shorts, he's done.

❣️ I've said this once, but I'll say it again, Shu’s into a girl that has dishelved hair since it gives him the image of what she’ll look like if she wakes up with him.

- Reiji -

❣️ Reiji has always hoped to meet someone worthwhile, someone he could dedicate himself to without finding it to be a waste of time.

❣️ Has hoped to meet his love in a mysterious and seductive way.

❣️ He wants to meet a girl that just puzzles and entrances him all at once. He wants to be able to find all the pieces in order to get to know her, and he’ll drive himself mad doing this.

❣️ And also, on a more psychological level, he wants a girl that will help him accept things as they come and as they are since he has a hard time with this.

❣️ (In one of the game routes, he said to Yui that he has a hard time accepting things, and that he was only able to because she taught him that.) 

❣️ Aw, my bae Rei :’)

❣️ Reiji has dated before and this is canon, so he definitely knows what he wants in an s/o.

❣️ He probably met his one and only at one of the balls Karl hosted and pursed her from there.

❣️ A girl who is somewhat witty and clever in personality.

❣️ Wants a girl who will listen to him talk about his scientific theories.

❣️ Likes it if his partner will just sit down in his lab and converse with him while he works.

❣️ Girls that have a classy fashion sense—there’s nothing better to him than being with a woman who knows how to present herself.

❣️ And if she surprises him by wearing a garter belt and garter socks under her outfit, he’s sold on her.

❣️ Especially if it’s under her school uniform.

❣️ A girl that wears red lipstick, especially during special gatherings. He just loves this on a woman.

❣️ Wants a girl that’s into being hugged from behind unexpectedly, so he can whisper sweet things into her ears and place soft kisses on her shoulders and neck.

❣️ If a girl calls him ‘dear’ or ‘dearest’—he just loves the formality and that it holds such sweetness.

❣️ Girls who tie their hair up into buns or have it styled in a short, rather sophisticated, style.

❣️ A girl who teases him—I know this sounds strange since we always see Reiji being so serious, but deep down, he actually likes to let loose, especially with a woman he loves or is in fact interested in.

❣️ (In the manga, he once got a little careless with Yui. He was about to drink her blood in the school’s hall. Yui of course said no and warned that someone could catch them since they were out in plain sight, but Reiji simply responded with ‘I don’t care’—so this is an example of how Reiji lets loose and that he in fact does from time to time.)

❣️ Now going back to the teasing, he’d love it if his lover would slip off his glasses while getting intimate with him.

❣️ A girl that walks with an elegant stride—he just loves this, especially if she’s wearing heels.

❣️ And if they’re red bottoms, he’s done.

❣️ Is entranced by a girl who invites him into bed while he’s busy. That’s definitely something our bae Rei won’t refuse. Right, @liannelara-dracula?

❣️ If she’s into carriage rides—there’s just something he loves about the aesthetic, classiness, antiquity of it all.

❣️ (This is actually how transportation is the demon world—yes, they still use horse pulled carriages to get around—so you can assume that Reiji would definitely be into taking his lover on an old carriage ride from back home. He went on a carriage ride with Yui once so…)

❣️ A girl who’s into taking long walks with him under the moonlight. Reiji finds this romantic, plus, it gives him the excuse to be alone with his lover. Also likes to hold his lover’s hand in this scenario.

❣️ And if he senses that she’s in the mood, he might try something frivolous. ;))

❣️ Likes to lay down with his lover and talk under the sheets.

❣️ His hair is soft as hell, so he enjoys it when his lover runs their fingers through it while he’s the little spoon—just don’t let any of his brothers see this, they’d never let him live it down.

❣️ A girl who will be appreciative of his the bento boxes (it’s canon that Reiji likes making them). In one of the drama CDs, he made boxes for everyone and spent so much time making the food in the bentos look like each of his brothers (the listener included), it was honestly so wholesome.

❣️ Oh, my bae rei :’).

❣️ A girl who's sorta oblivious to his sexual passes sometimes. For example, she's busy doing something and he'll give her a look as he's coming towards her and goes into initiating sex.

❣️ A girl that likes having tea with him—this is a must since we all know how much Reiji enjoys his tea.

❣️ And having it with a girl he loves or is interested in, is a big thing for him. He just loves it.

❣️ Sometimes however, Reiji likes to try something different for a beverage and that would be coffee—Chemex coffee more so.

❣️ My favorite type lmao.

❣️ Anyways, he prefers this method of making coffee because it reminds him of lab related stuff. It involves a lot of precision, which he loves.

❣️ And if his s/o is interested helping him prepare it, he’s definitely into teaching them.

❣️ Apart from coffee, Reiji is definitely into the culinary arts—so he’s always trying out new recipes.

❣️ Loves it if his s/o does taste tests for him—it means so much to Reiji that someone likes his cooking and compliments him for it, along with the work he’s put in.

❣️ This man needs love, oh my-

❣️ Reiji secretly likes shooting stars (this is canon), so having an s/o that’s into stargazing and watching for shooting stars is someone he wants by his side eternally.

❣️ And you can bet that during stargazing, Rei is pretty romantic.

❣️ Initiates lots of kisses in this scenario, so an s/o that likes this type of intimacy is something he’s into.

❣️ Carnivals! It’s no secret that Reiji loves carnivals, and it’s in fact canon that he loves rollercoasters. So an s/o that’s into this type of entertainment, he’s definitely on board.

❣️ Will buy his lover anything they desire at a carnival, he’s just too precious.

❣️ A girl who shares their cotton candy with him while exchanging sweet-tasting kisses—oh yeah, he’s all for it.

❣️ Even though he loves rollercoasters, he doesn’t mind if his s/o doesn’t, but it would be a plus if she did so he could enjoy riding them with her.

❣️ If his s/o is afraid of rollercoasters, he enjoys comforting them. It’s the little things that make our bae Rei who he is. 🙂

❣️ A girl that will appreciate his motherly side such as when he gives her his blazer when she’s cold; when he brings her a hair tie because she forgot one; or when he picks her up bridal style because her shoes get soaked from the rain, or when she’s tired of walking in heels.

❣️ A girl that likes to drink wine or champagne with him. Rei not only deems this as classy, but also romantic and secretly hopes it leads to a passionate night.

❣️ Honestly, Reiji’s into a girl who starts sensual sessions.

❣️ And if his lover pulls him in by his tie, he can’t handle it. ;))

- Laito -

❣️ The girl he wants to spend the rest of his life with is someone he hopes to meet in an oblivious or adventurous way since he’s all about suspense and scandal.

❣️ He probably met his one and only in one of two ways: they were friends for years and never looked at each other that way until later, or they were strangers and had a one night stand and he couldn’t stop thinking about her afterwards and pursued.

❣️ Likes girls who are witty and wicked in humor, mostly because he’s playful in nature.

❣️ Wants a girl who can paint him like one of her French boys. xDD

❣️ A girl who is open-ended and fluid with her sexuality.

❣️ A girl who can be both dominating and submissive, and if she leans more towards the dominant side, he’s all for it.

❣️ Is into girls who can make him cream and scream in bed. xDD

❣️ A girl that will argue about who’s the bigger slut in the relationship.

❣️ “If I’ve told you once, baby, I’ve told you a thousand times—but I’m the biggest slut.”

❣️ “Oh, really?” She’d tease.

❣️ “Are you challenging me?” He’d say.

❣️ A girl who is shameless with him and will whisper seductive things into his ears—this really gets him.

❣️ And if his lover gets into a conversation with him about having children, let’s just say he wants to play Picasso. ;)))

❣️ “All this talk of about babies has inspired something in me.” She’d say.

❣️ “Oh, is that so, baby?” He’d coo, enticing further. “What could that be?”

❣️ Pulling him closer by his collar, she’d deviously whisper, “I suppose we could let that bed over there speak for us.”

❣️ A girl who wakes up on top of him, or if they’re just napping together and she sleeps on top—he really likes this and won’t hesitate to run his hands up and down her body.

❣️ A girl that goes to bed naked.

❣️ A girl who plays with his hair and running her fingers through it.

❣️ And if she takes his fedora and runs off with it, he thrives on the chase, especially if she keeps telling him to catch her.

❣️ A girl who undoes the tie of his uniform when making out with him, and if it’s at school against the lockers, it’s just his favorite.

❣️ If his one and only by any chance slides down her underwear/garter in class and passes it to him under the desks as a temporary souvenir, he simply can’t contain himself and will get her for it later.

❣️ A girl that invites him for sex and make out sessions at school is definitely his type.

❣️ Is into a girl who passes him notes that range from “you look so cute today” to “you’d look even better with your clothes off.”

❣️ Is into girls who are into ditching class to do something scandalous with him.

❣️ Girls who grab his hand while walking with him, he likes the dominance remember?

❣️ Girls who spank his ass are big turn-on for him. He just loves the amusement and the fact that they can’t keep their hands to themselves when around him.

❣️ Laito will definitely throw his lover onto a bed and get on top of them when the moment is intimate. And if his s/o takes the initiative and flips him onto his back for reversed dominance he’s all for it. Let’s face it, this dude is all about dominant women.

❣️ Girls that are into being fed, and if she feeds him, he’s done.

❣️ Girls that aren’t ashamed of lifting their skirts or dresses to heat their bums by a fireplace (refer to this image). Laito’s into a lot of weird things, so a girl doing this is just too amusing to him.

❣️ If she does this secretly at balls while by a fireplace in the grand hall, he can't resist the view and whatnot. He'll totally take advantage of this on the spot.

❣️ Or better yet, if she does it and tells him to look without doing anything, it takes everything in him to hold back.

❣️ In fact, it might inspire him to pull down his pants and try it with her.

❣️ Oh dear, I’ve said too much.

❣️ Girls that are into wearing form fitting dresses---he's all about the curvature of a woman, so this is a big turn-on for him.

❣️ Matching manicures and pedicures with his lover.

❣️ An s/o he can do the unthinkable with, such as getting nipple piercings together.

❣️ Girls that like getting caught while intimate, it only riles him up.

❣️ Girls that like breaking all the rules, especially something like curfew just to hangout with him.

❣️ If she plays the role of the “good girl” and is actually “bad” or rebellious by nature, he can’t contain himself. He loves it if his s/o plays this duo life so he can tease her for it. And he especially thrives if she’s only “bad” for him.

❣️ A girl who’s into being surprised in bed. For example, she’ll be like half asleep and he’ll wake her up by planting kisses all over her body.

❣️ A girl who laughs during sex—he finds this cute.

❣️ But why do I get the feeling that it’s mostly him who’s a laughing mess since he’s weird like that xDD.

❣️ As we all know, Laito likes to play the piano, so a girl that knows how to play is definitely a plus.

❣️ He also likes to softly tease her by laying kisses on her neck while she plays, and you can best bet this will lead to a much steamier session since he’s all about intimacy. So a girl that’s into this type of affection is someone he definitely wants as a one and only.

❣️ A girl that will pull him in by the tie, he can’t take it.

❣️ A girl that’s not ashamed of being naked, even if it’s in front of others.

❣️ A girl that will wear his hat during sex. If she pushes him down on the bed, takes his hat, puts it on, and rides him with his hat on, he’s all hers.

❣️ A girl that runs through the sprinklers in her underwear and he joins.

❣️ It happened in the front yard of the mansion once and Reiji was mad. xDD

❣️ A girl that doesn't wear underwear, even when she goes out.

- Kanato -

❣️ Girls who are into wearing transparent night gowns.

❣️ It’s the type of girl he likes to pull into bed with him anyday.

❣️ Food play—this is a big one for him, so a girl that’s into this, he’s all for it.

❣️ Like Laito, he’s into girls who are into being fed. Kanato’s very much into feeding his lover his cakes and other sweets.

❣️ Likes a girl that’s into sitting on the school stairs or benches and just talking about whatever with him.

❣️ And if the girl makes him raspberry pudding (it’s canon that this is his favorite dessert), he’s so taken back by this.

❣️ Is into a girl that’s into exchanging soft kisses and getting into steamy sessions with him.

❣️ A girl that can sing him to sleep—he’s a big fan of lullabies so being able to fall asleep to a sweet tune sung by his s/o is more than a treat to him, it’s a literal paradise.

❣️ Girls that are into wearing flower crowns, and if she wears one that he makes her, it really means everything to him.

❣️ Girls that wear bows in their hair and lean more towards a cutesy style of attire.

❣️ When it comes to romance, this boy wants to be bewitched.

❣️ He loves the game of entrancement a girl can subject onto him, mostly because he likes the mystery concept like Reiji.

❣️ When he met his s/o, it was probably by attraction at first sight and he kept it secret for a while.

❣️ Location wise, he probably met his lover in the garden outside the mansion. She was probably a guest at a party Karl was hosting and when Kanato saw his s/o, he didn’t pay much attention to them at first, but boy, was he physically attracted to them.

❣️ Stargazing—it’s simple, but rather romantic when alone with a partner.

❣️ And here, Kanato takes the opportunity to get intimate even if he’s out in nature with his lover. He’ll claim that he wants to give the stars and moon a show by making his lover drown in ecstasy. So bear in mind, he’s into a girl that’s all for this.

❣️ Is into a girl that’s into poems and if she’s into hearing them be recited by him.

❣️ Kanato really digs deep into poetry since he’s deeper than most think, so reading poetry together with his s/o is a must. It’s something he deems romantic.

❣️ Is also into a girl that will accept poetry he writes and bare in mind that what he writes it is for her and her eyes only.

❣️ Just don’t let any of his brothers read what he wrote to his lover. All hell will break loose.

❣️ Lots of pillow talk.

❣️ This man is all about those after sex talks and they range from being teasing to downright lewd, there is no awkwardness/weirdness here.

❣️ Prefers that his s/o wears a see-through slip to bed, to which he can take/rip off.

❣️ A girl that gives him devious looks from afar that hint towards sexual intentions.

❣️ If a girl has silky soft hair, he loves to run his hands through it any day.

❣️ A girl who’s scandalous but only for him.

❣️ Teasing is something he’s all for, like if she pulls the strap of his overalls to get his attention, he’s really hooked.

❣️ If a girl takes the lead in sex—that is, she's making out with him she always aims to pull down the straps of his overalls with a lot of force—and it’s quick!

❣️ Although he likes being sensual and taking his time, he likes that sometimes she rushes things because she’s eager for him. This brings out the animal in him.

❣️ If she uses lotions that smell like a fruit or soft flower. He really likes this and will compliment her for it.

❣️ Likes it if a girl goes by her full name rather than a shortened version (ex. Lian vs. Lianna). Kanato claims that a girl’s elegance and beauty is only heightened when she uses her full first name rather than something abbreviated. Hopefully that makes sense lol.

❣️ Kanato’s very much into touching his lover’s neck or stroking it in a delicate manner when a moment gets soft, or if he’s trying to get their attention. So, a girl that’s into this type of affection is someone he’s sold on.

❣️ A girl that doesn’t mind being reeled in for a sudden kiss. This man is all about passion, so he’ll randomly cup his lover’s cheeks, pull them close and kiss them, even in front of his brothers.

❣️ Idk why I didn’t mention this sooner but, tea parties are an absolute must with Kanato.

❣️ He especially likes making his lover teas that smell like flowers.

❣️ And if the universe is on his side and his lover ends up having tea drip down from the sides of their lips, he’ll take the initiative by suddenly licking it off them.

❣️ And as devious as he is, he’ll claim that he was just trying to prevent the tea from falling on their clothes ;))).

❣️ Speaking of clothes, he loves a girl who appreciates the clothes he sews for her. He’s really big on this and will sew his s/o stuff he thinks they’d look great in. After all, this man could be a fashion designer, hence @liannlara-dracula’s post about it here.

❣️ Girls that don't wear a bra to bed, mostly because it gives him the excuse to caress or grope their boobs if he decides to get initmate with them.

❣️ If she sits across from at the small table, he’ll lift up her skirt/dress with his foot—and if she returns him a devious look or smirk, he’s definitely turned on.

❣️ Likes a girl who’s into heavy eye contact, especially if she’s dancing or with someone else and he's looking from afar.

❣️ Girls who wear knee/thigh high socks.

❣️ If she pouts or gives puppy dog eyes—it really gets him. (It’s ancient, but I have a post on this subject here.)

❣️ A girl who is really sweet but maybe fragile in some sense.

❣️ He likes a girl who will allow him to brush her hair and apply makeup on her. So here, he kinda holds her by her chin and has her looking up at him. He does it in a way where he can be really close, and this invokes a lot sexual undertones since he likes to be suggestive.

❣️ Likes a girl that will be turned on by his whispers or mummers in her ear.

❣️ Likes it she plays with his hair in bed.

❣️ If she sits beside him and rests her head on his shoulder.

❣️ A girl who looks pretty when she sleeps.

- Ayato -

❣️ Ayato wants someone he can be obnoxious with and vice versa.

❣️ Is definitely into girls with attitude—and I mean attitude, it’s a turn-on for him.

❣️ Cliche but he’d probably meet his girl at school.

❣️ She’d probably someone he’d constantly try to impress from the start.

❣️ A girl that he can call “bruh” and have “bruh” moments with lmao. xDD

❣️ Pillow forts all the way—he loves a girl who’s into this.

❣️ Fuck yeah! Pillow forts society!

❣️ A girl who he can have friendly competitions with. And if she’s competitive like him, it’s a bonus and only riles him up more.

❣️ “Babe, I’ve told you a million times. You’re no match for me.” He’d boast.

❣️ “Oh really? We’ll see about that.” She’d challenge.

❣️ He claims he always lets her win in competitons, when realistically, he just lost those matches.

❣️ A girl that catches him off guard with her comebacks.

❣️ Girls that wear strappy things and that act innocent about it, he's so turned on he can't contain himself.

❣️ Pretends that he gets whatever they’re talking about sometimes (like if they’re talking about math or science for example), but he really doesn’t get it. So a girl that can see through this and still stay with him is a plus.

❣️ Cordelia probably gave him the bs talk that the girl he dates has to be ‘below’ him in every way.

❣️ She also probably told him that the girl needs to be absolutely flawless because she has to ‘represent’ him since he’s ‘the best’ but she can’t be ‘above’ him. It’s kinda like ‘the best should have the best, but not better than himself’ hopefully that makes sense haha.

❣️ We’ve all heard that some couples keep each other’s shirts/hoodies, and Ayato’s all for this.

❣️ He’s especially into keeping his lover’s bra too whilst they keep a pair of his boxers lol.

❣️ If his girl leaves her bra in his locker as a souvenir to keep instead of a shirt, he just gets off on this. It’s untraditional, but he’s all for it.

❣️ Or he may even steal his girl’s bra and keep it in his locker as a souvenir to annoy her. He’s obnoxious so an s/o that can tolerate this is a plus.

❣️ A girl who’s into wearing his clothes, he’s so into this.

❣️ Wearing his cologne—he just loves the fact if his girl smells like him, which serves as another way of him claiming his girl as his.

❣️ A girl that likes to game it. Ayato loves video games as we all know, so a girl that’s into gaming is quite the turn on for him since he can play against or with her.

❣️ A girl that forces him to go to the mall with her. He’ll act likes he’s so annoyed, but realistically, he actually likes going shopping with his girl.

❣️ He carries all the bags, especially because yours truly has to “prove” his strength haha.

❣️ And if they go into Victoria’s Secret, it’s taking everything in him to not die. Remember, boobs are his weakness.

❣️ If his girl tries on new clothes and models them, he finds this hot.

❣️ A girl who’s always trying something new with her hair, especially if she’s into dying it new colors. Ayato’s really into this.

❣️ In fact, he’ll volunteer to dye her hair and claims he’ll do a better job than anyone.

❣️ But in the end it all goes to shit because he doesn’t know what he’s doing even tho he claims to.

❣️ A girl that’s into watching TV—horror movies specifically. He tries to act composed when he watches them with his girls, but fails.

❣️ Secretly likes a girl that strokes his head/hair while watching a movie—he just has to be absoltely sure that his brothers are not home because if they are, his ego goes out the window.

❣️ Likes a girl that cooks for him, and if they make kick-ass takoyaki, he’s never letting them go–no really.

❣️ Likes a girl who forces him to help her in the kitchen.

❣️ Is into a girl who babies him. He may act like he doesn’t like it, but secretly, he likes the coddling.

❣️ A girl he can show off his strength to, and be complimented for it. He’s all about being acknowledged.

❣️ Likes a girl that leaves him love notes in his locker.

❣️ A girl that’s willing to pass frivolous notes to him, especially if she’s inviting him to a heated session in the locker room.

❣️ A girl that likes being a strip tease or posing as a thirst trap, he can’t contain himself.

❣️ A girl who’s confident in every way.

❣️ A girl who’s dominating. Yes, Ayato is perceived as the dominant one, but tbh, he can’t handle it if a girl dominates him.

❣️ Likes a girl he can be the little spoon with. Sometimes it’s hard being “the best” or least making everyone think that, so Ayato prefers a girl he can let loose with.

❣️ A girl who allows him to pat her head or scruffle her hair playfully. He likes babying his girl so.

❣️ A girl who’s into taking showers with him in the locker rooms at school, especially after those sweaty practice sessions or basketball games.

❣️ Likes to surprise his girl by walking in naked after showering and giving them an adrenaline rush.

❣️ “What’s the matter babe? Is it that jaw-dropping?” He’d smirk.

❣️ “Shut up!”

❣️ A girl that likes being carried bridal style, he just loves holding his girl like this.

❣️ Even though he has bad memories of swimming because of certain purple-haired jezebel, he likes a girl who’s willing to go swimming in the lake by the manor with him, or in the manor’s indoor pool.

❣️ And you can bet he’ll challenge her to do fancy flips to jump into the pool or racing her from one side to the other.

❣️ Like Kanato, he's also into a girl that doesn't wear a bra to bed. He likes that his girl is in this raw state, and if she’s wearing something strappy or seethrough on her chest area, he’s really riled up because he likes the view.

- Subaru -

❣️ Growing up, Subaru honestly never thought about “caring” for anyone.

❣️ He grew up in a pretty tarnished household and was subjected to a lot of trauma because of it, so loving someone was definitely the last thing on his mind.

❣️ He probably always told himself that love wasn’t real and was something only found in fairytales, or it was only a “human” thing since vampires don’t hold human emotions.

❣️ Since he’s a loner, he’s always stayed at the back of things, in the shadows more specifically.

❣️ Despite this though, don’t think that this boy hasn’t caught the attention of a few women throughout the centuries.

❣️ I mean, you can’t tell me this boy is virgin considering the way he acts with Yui. He’s more of a fuckin perv that you’d imagine, just read the manga. He’s been around for centuries, there’s honestly no way.

❣️ He’d probably meet his girl at school.

❣️ Or, if we really wanna be dramatic, he’d probably meet his girl through having to save her in a dark alley from some drunk fucks who were harassing her.

❣️ He kinda follows the trope of “I didn’t think I’d ever fall in love with that person.”

❣️ Bear in mind that our bby car is kinda oblivious to his own feelings and will not admit them easily.

❣️ Anyways, with this, he’s into girls that entrance him without saying a word to him.

❣️ This literally drives him crazy since he can’t figure out why they’re constantly on his mind.

❣️ A girl that notices him and at least says hi to him if she sees him at school, it makes this undead vampire’s heart skip a beat.

❣️ A girl that wears flowy dresses or skirts that encompass her figure beautifully if she spins. This just takes his breath away.

❣️ Girls that wear their hair in cute, short styles, but he honestly doesn’t care. He likes long hair too.

❣️ Girls that are into taking car rides with him/cruising.

❣️ And if he gets her skirt to go up while going fast, he's all for it.

❣️ If she looks out his convertible while he's driving and catches a glimpse of her ass while she's leaning over, and if she's wearing shorts, you can best bet he'll clutch/smack her ass even if he's driving just to get a reaction out of her.

❣️ A girl that doesn't mind him keeping a garter of hers in the glove box of his car.

❣️ A girl who's into car sex—there's something about the small secluded space of a car that he just loves to get intimate in.

❣️ Girls who wear hairpins and barrettes—he really thinks girls look cute with them.

❣️ A girl that has to get on her tippy toes to kiss him. He likes the height difference and that she has to try that hard to be intimate with him.

❣️ It amuses him in all honesty and he'll definitely tease her about it, saying that she's needy and eager for him.

❣️ Girls that are into having their clothes ripped off when getting intimate—like, literally.

❣️ A girl who’s confident in both body and mind. He’s insecure so he admires a girl that thinks of herself in a positive way.

❣️ A girl that likes getting drunk with him and doing stupid shit together when wasted.

❣️ If it’s a full moon, he likes to play a game of trust with his s/o–that is, by having them jump from the roof of the mansion so he can catch them.

❣️ Since the asshole can fly, he’s able to catch his girl quite easily. He’d never let his girl hit the ground, but sometimes he likes to really scare them by catching them before almost hit the ground to give them a scare since he likes teasing them.

❣️ Fuckin’ ass-

❣️ Stargazing—Subaru likes watching stars with his girl. Mostly because he can be a bit intimate with her and kiss her here and there. So a girl that’s into this, he’s all for it.

❣️ Likes a girl that will listen to him talk about his coffin (this is canon!).

❣️ Is into a girl that doesn’t mind to have sex on the couch with the tv on.

❣️ Definitely likes girl that showers with him.

❣️ He likes to tease his girl by holding things above her head so she can't reach them. He also makes things out of reach on purpose and likes it when she jumps for them, to which he comments on her being small compared to him. So a girl who can tolerate his obnoxious behavior in this sense is something he treasures.

❣️ A girl that is ticklish, he loves hearing the sound of a girl laugh as it low-key turns him on. And with that, he begins to wonder what she sounds like in bed.

❣️ Like Kanato and Ayato, he’s into a girl that doesn't wear a bra to bed.

❣️ I wonder where this preference came from? Karl maybe lmao. xDD

❣️ A girl that initiates kisses. Remember, he likes a girl who’s confident so yeah.

❣️ Is into girl he could tease to no end. He literally lives her reactions.

❣️ A girl that surprises him every once in a while with her dominance.

❣️ A first, he’ll act like he doesn’t like it, but secretly, he’s living for it. And when he gets comfortable, his girl can be prepared to be under his touch every five minutes.

❣️ Fuck I wanna be that girl jk ahaha!

❣️ A girl that doesn't mind sleeping in his coffin with him

❣️ Afterall, it’s one of his favorite places to have sex.

❣️ Is into stealing a kiss from his girl or placing one on her forehead while she’s sleeping in hopes that she don’t wake up. So a girl that figures this out, but doesn’t give him a hard time about it is something he likes.

❣️ Enjoys being in the rose garden alone with his girl where he can either drink her blood or share sweet kisses with her. So if she’s into this, he’s hooked.

❣️ It’s rare, but Subaru’s more romantic than most think. He’s into giving his girl a rose, most likely from the mansion’s garden, but this is not often. And if she accepts it, it’s more than enough for him to blush like an idiot.

[hellyeahsickaf]

I worded this the way I did for a reason:

"when you're in need of immediate treatment" "especially if you think your life is in danger or something could at least cause severe harm if untreated."

I didn't say make shit up. To be clear, do not make up symptoms you don't have. But if you need to cry to be believed, then fucking cry if you can.

Doctors often do not believe you if you don't appear to be in pain (many pw chronic illnesses are not looking like they're at a 7-9 when they are bc pain is their normal). Or sometimes they're unconvinced for one reason or another. This could have cost me my life on multiple occasions. I have a dissociative disorder so sometimes I can't play it up, it doesn't show because I'm so far removed from my pain. On top of that I'm allergic to NSAIDs. Sometimes addicts experiencing withdrawals say the same so many times I've had to wait hours for any sort of pain relief while they looked over to see if I seemed to be telling the truth. They often don't believe me when I do.

When I was 7 or 8, I fell off of my scooter and landed on the handlebar- directly on my orbital. Half an inch or so further and it would've gone right through my silly little brain. Had every symptom of a concussion but I didn't show the pain much. They just scolded me for not wearing a helmet (would not have prevented the injury). I told them I was in a lot of pain but it didn't show and they didn't believe me. Over a decade later I get an MRI for migraines and they pick up what they believe is a congenital defect or a sign of an old fracture. Essentially "this is probably just a defect but ask the patient if he's ever broken his face" (they didn't ask lol). Looking at the images I knew exactly the injury I was looking at. I was concussed, broke my skull, and they sent me home and told me I was irresponsible

Few days after that injury I passed out, and ate shit and paramedics had to show up. And still all they had to tell me was to drink Pedialyte.

In the post I also added, "This goes much extra if you're black, and doctors and staff have biases, sometimes awful ones. Some even still believe that black people have a better pain tolerance"

I can attest to this as I'm half black (a little less like 40%ish idk). I've been told that I should have a better pain tolerance but I must not have inherited that 🙄. I'm racially ambiguous in appearance (though sometimes if I flare up really bad I get so pale people have thought I was just white lmao) but it is a legitimate belief that some have, that black people just have a better pain tolerance. As mentioned this dates back to slavery. It was used as justification for beating slaves.

Hell my shitty ex even believed it. He was no doctor but he said he learned it in health class. Said some stupid shit about how I should have a better pain tolerance than him and he wasn't joking.

So yeah I agree with you for the most part. Be honest about your symptoms. If you think you have a stomach issue don't tell them you have chest pains if you don't. But if you're not being believed and you have reason to believe something serious is going on, you may need to cry, you may need to hold your stomach and double over. Medical neglect like this could've killed me as recent as last Summer. It wasn't the first or second or even fifth time it was that urgent and they treated me like shit.

Doctors think they know when you're lying and sometimes they're right. Sometimes they're not. I have a lot of experience with them being wrong actually and my first memory of that happening is when I broke my god damn skull. The most recent was when I was laughed at over the phone for asking for pain medication days after I was in the hospital for like 6-8 hours before I was given anything more for my pain than Tylenol

And to address your tags:

The situations I'm talking about is when you are the patient in need of life saving care. Again I'm not saying act like you're having a heart attack when your symptoms allude to appendicitis. I don't understand why you seem to have interpreted this as "pretend you're dying even tho you're clearly not lol"

Lying doesn't make doctors treat me better because I don't lie to them. They also already treat me like shit. But playing up my symptoms (when I can, sometimes I don't have the ability to) has saved me potentially several hours of traumatizing levels of pain and at times probably my life or severe consequences

It's not that I've been manipulated by the hating doctors website. It's just what I've had to do to survive or at least minimize the trauma of the experience

Play up your symptoms in the ER and urgent care when you're in need of immediate treatment. No I am not kidding. This goes much extra if you're black, and especially if you think your life is in danger or something could at least cause severe harm if untreated. Doctors and staff have biases, sometimes awful ones. Some even still believe that black people have a better pain tolerance but that was a lie created to justify American slavery.

[kkusuka]

CONGRATULATIONS FOR 3K!!!! i am really happy for you! i love your writing and i believe you deserve each of your followers.

please, headcanons for jujutsu kaisen! i'd like king of curses sukuna, where he marries the reader, which is a princess from another continent to expand his territories (we all know that if sukuna wants territories he would just take them by force, he is the king after all, but that's just a detail) — unaware that he would find a tough woman, who does not like the idea of ​​marriage and hates him. it would be funny to have some dynamics queen x king. like hate sex; an important dinner with the court and they start throwing food at each other; the reader doesn't like the idea of concubines and send them away; how would he react? how did they fall in love? you don't have to write about everything i said, choose tree of them by the rules, but just seeing this idea here would be incredible! oh, and she/her pronouns please. thank you so much!!!

<3

a/n:  I……….. love this. I really hope I did the ask justice!

Well firstly, he probably takes a wife because he needs someone to clean the temple, and he’s sick of the town’s sacrifices. And what better for him than taking more land! That’s where you come in, lovely princess Y/n of the northern continent!

He was sure you would be some frail, shy little lamb that would do anything he says. Like a little maid for him to order around.

So his first opinion of you was that you were going to be a bore. And, in his defense, you gave him no reason to think otherwise. The first day you were there, you didn’t say a single word… to anyone. Not even a maid. So he really thought he would just kill you and tell everyone that you went missing.

He tried, on the sending night in the mansion he invited you to a diner with him. (aw, your first dinner as a married couple!) well- that’s if you had bothered to show up. For an hour, 12 minutes, and 17 seconds he waited for you to arrive in the dining hall. He was just fed up. How dare you? Did you know who he was? What he could do in a split second?

He was at your room door within seconds--- since you both refused to sleep in the same room-- and you opened the door like you hadn’t done a thing.

“Where the fuck were you?” -- he was already barging his way into your room, you calmly closed the door and waltzed back to your couch. Where he assumed you had spent your time before he came. “When I invitee you to dinner, you will be there”

“And if I don't want to?”

“Excuse me?” He was shocked. Angered. Deadly. Turned on? He really didn’t know but he was truly infuriated you even spoke back to him, never mind questioned his authority.

“I said,” you sighed. sling over the arm of the couch, tilting your head to the Demon before you, “what if I don't want to? I had no intention to entertain you over dinner this evening, nor do I any other time. So if you are here to berate me or spout about your authority, I suggest you take your leave.”

Spoiler alert (not really, just the expression) - you guys fucked until the sun came up, all over the same couch.

Somehow this became a common occurrence. Him doing something o annoy you, you doing something back, then taking your anger out on the other in a night full of moans and the sound of skin slapping.

And you held your word too, you didn’t show up to anything. But you did start sending people to tell him you wouldn’t be coming and repeatedly told him how disgusting you thought he was and how you hated him. Eventually, he was just fed up, he didn’t care what you thought of him and if you were only going to fuck him when you were angry, he would just firn another lady to fuck.

And, lord knows you hate him, but you were fucking married. And if you really hated one thing, it was infidelity. Your father had multiple concubines and you saw what it did to your mother and you would be damned if you let the same happen to you.

“Who the fuck is this, Sukuna?’ you were livid. The bastard looked so proud of himself, having some random commoner on his lap.

“This is Yui. I plan to make her a concubine this coming Sunday.” in all honesty, you should have expected this. A true heartless monster he was. You knew all about his womanizing way and how many women he went through, and you couldn’t exactly say he couldn’t have a concubine.

You really were stuck between a rock and a hard place. Reminded of your mother, you take the action you wish she did, “Fine, but if I see her- in any sense- I will have her head.”  his laugh echoed down the hallway until you reached your wing.

And true to your word, only two months later, she was seated in your seat at the dinner table. Unfortunately for her she never got to see the rest of the meal- a new lesson was learned, your warnings were not to be ignored.

Now, there was one event, not even you could evade; the monthly council dinner party. The most annoying party either of you had ever been to.

It was boring and was clearly just a hoax for nobles to get in your good graces. But, somehow, you both bonded over how much you hated it. You spent the whole time making fun of people’s outfits and how fancy all the food was- small portions really are the worst.

“Who let her walk out of the house like that?” you laughed into your wine glass. Sukuna doing the same, eyes darting to a woman fake laughing somewhere in the corner of the room. Clad in all brown the woman was an eyesore at best.

“The same person who allowed Dutchess Haruknuka out in that hat.”

You guys really just spent the night fooling around and talking shit. It was also the time you started playing games with him, predicting who would finish their food first, seeing who could catch more cheese cubes in their mouth, how much wine you could down in one go.

You still held a strong resentment against him, but he was becoming more and more tolerable.

So, falling in love wasn’t really falling. It was more like a crash through a glass store window into a china shop.

It didn’t happen often, but the mansion gets attacked by some “heroic” people trying to save the people from the demon king.

But this was the first time they had directly attacked your wing of the mansion. It was late before he heard a word about the attack, rushing over to protect his queen- when he began to call you that he didn’t know. The sight that greeted him was you fighting off grown men- covered I their blood, with barely a scratch, though he knew you beginning to be fatigued.

Just as you struck another man down, you let your guard down and was open to a blow to the back of your head, if he hadn’t stepped in the shielded you with his own body- the man falling dead at your feet.

Something in your eyes told him that protecting you with his life would become a pretty common occurrence.

A tiny little headcanon bonus:

Your first baby was a son and when he first learned to walk Sukuna would push him down every time he stood up near him and the only way you could get him to stop was by throwing baby toys at him.

tags: @diamond-3 @rinsangel @heyheyitsne @angelalje @monisi @crystal-lilac

[genshin-obsessed]

Him as a Genshin Player | Haikyuu & BNHA

☽ UGHH I FINALLY FINISHED IT TOOK ME SO DAMN LONG TT^TT anyways! the thought i had yesterday was during when i was choosing the next character I was like "kenma would get Diluc" and then this idea hit me! Like I said, it's ironic how I didn't think of this earlier. Also yes, this is my first thing for my "multifandom" (it's 99.9% still genshin :')) blog now ^w^

☽ Anyway! Enjoy, I worked really hard on this ;-; the format's a little messy I didn't wanna make a list for it... but I ended up doing it anyway halfway through

☽ Side note: I don't remember the tags so it looks like a mess down there. don't worry about it :')

☽ Includes: Kenma Kozume, Tadashi Yamaguchi, Yu Nishinoya, Hitoshi Shinsou, Tamaki Amajiki, and Eijiruo Kirishima

☽ HAIKYUU!! ☾

» Kenma Kozume

Lmao.

Has every single character. Multiple constellations if he wants for the five stars. Gaming is his job sooo technically, he’s just excelling at his work ^w^

Sadly though, he’s got shit luck with the gacha. It’s like losing the 50/50 is tradition with him. If he doesn’t lose the 50/50 something in the world has gone horribly wrong. So yeah, he’s constantly swiping that credit card- His weapon luck sucks just as much.

His artifact luck is amazing though, he doesn’t have to suffer as long as some other people. But then again… he has so many characters-

He has a solid main team but those alternate teams are also pretty much perfect, too. He gets bored and his stream chat recommends he build some character and he’ll do it. Going off this, he’ll also build any characters for you if you want. For example, you don’t have time but want to build that Venti, let him borrow your account. He’ll stream his progress and before you know it, you’ll have Venti all built!

He knows all the secret chest locations, he can find all the anemoculous, geoculous, electroculous, he knows the farming routes, easiest way to make mora, level characters, get those friendship levels up- ok, you get.

He knows everything. Probably quite a bit of the lore too.

He’ll whale for you. What’s that? Zhongli just came out and you want him? Log in the next day and you might have a C1 Zhongli :)

He’ll carry you through all the domains and through the bosses. He wants your team to be as strong as his!

Co-op for days with you and probably only you.

If you’re new or still learning, he’s the best because he knows everything! And it’s so fun to play with him!

He’ll stream while he plays with you but if that makes you uncomfy, no worries! He’ll find time!

Yes, you can play on his account, just try not to switch artifacts around TOO much. You can, though! For example you want to play on his Diluc- just move around whatever you want and use whatever team you want- he’s already got his stuff memorized. That last team preset is for you! Use it how you want!

He’ll let you decorate his tea pot if he can decorate yours. He loves showing it off.

» Tadashi Yamaguchi

It takes him a minute to learn. He takes his time and you can’t rush him.

He has a few five stars cuz he’s lucky but he will opt to save up for one he really wants.

He does have favorites: Zhongli, Albedo, Bennett, Xiao, and Keqing. He’s got a c5 Bennett but no constellations of the 5 stars. He does have a c1 Jean, though.

He’s actually lucky with the weapons. He’s got Wolf’s Gravestone on a single pull, Skyward Spine with like 25 pity, and Primordial Jade Spear.

It takes him some time to learn about the game. He might miss an anemoculi here and a geoculi over there, but he’ll get them in the end.

Super invested in the lore. Like you’ll wake up to a text about a new theory he learned and it’s just so adorable to watch him gush. And of course, every now and then he has his own theories.

He’s not a whale, because he has his solid team and doesn’t roll unless he REALLY wants a character. This man will have like 12k primogems saved up for a future character. His luck is better than average, so he’ll roll for you too if you want.

He’s slow and he takes his time with the game- so you’re probably carrying him through the domains. But it’s ok! He doesn’t mind and it’s all about having fun.

You two learn together! You have plenty of giggles when you realize you missed an obvious chest, or that the tree in Inazuma levels up your electrogranums so you can get to those hidden electroculous- it’s just a lot of fun.

Whenever he has time, he’ll try and play with you. However, if you’re busy one day- or even for a few days- he’ll play on your account. He’ll do your dailies, weeklies if you can’t do them, and will even try finishing some events so you have the primogems at least. If you really want something from an event (i.e an outfit or a namecard) he’ll play and try to get it for you!

Of course you can play on his account! He’d never stop you! Just like him, you’ll often jump just to make sure his dailies are done and he’s caught up on certain events. Other than that, you find it fun to run around on his account, collecting the materials he’ll need for a certain character. Please don’t move the artifacts around too much, he’ll forget and try to fight a boss only to do 179 damage.

He loves to decorate the Serenitea pot with you. You two will often switch accounts and just decorate each other’s homes, adding cute little things that have been previous inside jokes.

» Yu Nishinoya

He was pretty excited for Genshin Impact to come out. Like he already had the game downloaded before launch. He definitely got you to do the same because he wanted to play with you as soon as possible. He forgot co-op unlocks at level 16.

He does have a couple of five stars, but they were accidental. As in he lost the 50/50 and got them. He has a c4 Mona, c5 Jean, c1 Keqing, Venti, paid for c1 Zhongli, Childe, c1 Kazuha, and got SUPER lucky with Klee, Eula, and Ayaka. His luck with characters is horrible. He plays so much that he has enough primogems to lose to a 50/50 only to spend money to get more.

He can’t count the times he’s had to spend money because he really wants a character but ended up getting a Jean instead. He cried once. You actually ended up buying him Venti for his birthday- well early birthday.

His luck with weapons isn’t bad. If he gets a gold he wants it to be a character, but it can end up being a book. Best believe it was like 89 pity too. Artifact luck is ok though. He actually gets decent artifacts- he was bound some good luck lol

He’s got a solid team and doesn’t like switching much from them. He might just to level up a new character or try a new character out, but certain ones like Barbara and Zhongli never leave his team.

He doesn’t pay attention to the lore very much- he just wants to fight bosses and win! But then at some point when you talk about lore he’s completely lost, “Signora the Cryo Archon?” “No, baby, Signora is not the Cryo Archon.”

He whales for certain characters. Because of how bad his luck is, the last thing he wants to do is sink thousands of dollars into this game, therefore he’s half a whale.

He’s learning the game’s mechanics pretty quickly! He might know a few farm routes, where some hidden chests are, and the like. He’ll teach you as much as he can, but then again you two did level together so it’s not like you were way too off.

He LOVES to co-op with you! Kenma, Yamaguchi, and Even Hinata have asked to play and he says yes, but he’ll literally quit on them the second he can play with you. You have joined him and his friends when one of them can’t play. You’re often Hinata’s replacement (not exactly, you have a place in their lil group!) since he’s pretty busy with practice and games- not that anyone minds.

He’s more than happy to do your dailies or weeklies and even some events and vice versa! There will be days where neither of you will have time to play so you’ll just let Kenma handle it. Kenma’s also willing to roll for both of you in the event you guys want a character. For your birthdays one of your gifts is 100% the character you want. If the character comes out months after your birthday, Kenma will use his streaming as an excuse (like wanting to play on a friend’s account) then get your characters!

Of course, you can play on his account! But good luck. If his team is nothing like yours, you have to get used to it because he hasn’t built anyone else. He’s leveled them, so his Eula is level 90 but he doesn’t use her very much because he prefers Childe and Bennett. So her build isn’t all that great. You can cheese your way around it though if you want. You also don’t mind if he plays on your account- you just ask that he doesn’t move around artifacts too much.

You love to decorate his Serenitea pot and he doesn’t mind letting you! He loves to see how creative you can get!

☽ BNHA ☾

» Hitoshi Shinsou

He heard about the game through another friend and wanted to try it out. You agreed, saying you’d play with him because why not?

He’s a really fast learner. He picks up on mechanics really quick, understands the lore/story- like it’s surprising. He gets to AR16 very quickly and has to wait a little bit for you. He can play for you, but he wanted you to play to that point just so you could get used to the game.

His luck with the gacha is actually pretty damn good. He hasn’t lost a single 50/50 yet. As far as he’s been rolling, which was on the following banners: Venti, Klee, Albedo, Zhongli, Eula, and Yoimiya. He also has all the five stars from the standard banner. He doesn’t need to put much money into the game because he’s gathered all the primogems he can from every chest, event, quest, achievement- everything. He also doesn’t always need to hit pity, he gets his gold around 40-50 rolls, which is about 8k primos which he always has. He DID, however, put money in the game for Baal.

He doesn’t really need to spend money, he usually has enough primos- sometimes he’ll need to buy a little bit extra but not enough to be considered a whale.

He has two teams and a couple of backup characters built. The thing is, different bosses require different characters so he can’t just stick to one character. Plus he likes shaving all his 5 stars at 80/90.

He knows what lore is provided by the story and just a little bit through the items and whatnot. He doesn’t necessarily get into the details or theories, but if you’re going to share one, he won’t stop you.

He knows the farm routes, hidden chests, exactly where every single anemoculi, geoculi, and electroli are hiding, he even knows all the secret chests from those weird quests. He’s really good at fighting bosses. He can do the “x character solos Azdaha with 1 hp��� easily.

He only co-ops with you. Denki has asked to play many times and he keeps saying no. You two have a lot of fun together and he really only prefers to play when you’re online cuz he’ll get lonely otherwise.

He will log in for you if you can’t and vice versa. He’ll wait to do weeklies last minute in the event you did want to do them. But as stated earlier, he doesn’t play much without you. He’ll only do events since they give lots of primos and you’ll both need them.

Of course, you can play on his account! Just be careful with the builds. He’ll always forget about them and try to fight something then get his ass kicked.

He loves to mess with your Serenitea pot. Like… mess with it. You’ll log in and everything’s been put away or something. He will 100% fix it for you. He will leave cute little things there for you though.

» Tamaki Amajiki

He had heard about it but he started pretty late- around the Zhongli banner. He really enjoys the game and plays it whenever he can. He has it on both his phone and pc.

His first five star… was Zhongli. Zero pity. First ten-roll and he got geo daddy. He was super happy and called you to show you. He’s since then collected Xiao, Ganyu, Hu Tao, Venti, and Eula.

You could say he’s a bit lucky with the gacha. He gets characters and weapons really easily. He’s only ever lost one 50/50 and it was on Ayaka’s banner and he got Diluc instead. Yeah, he was a little sad.

He doesn’t spend money for characters. He saves enough primogems and if he doesn’t get them, that’s fine. He really wants Scaramouche so he’s waiting for him right now.

He’s got plenty of really well built characters. He doesn’t like sticking with one team for too long so he’s always working on someone new. Besides, he’s always getting someone new so. And yes, he’s got good luck with the artifacts too-

He loves the lore and he will stay up til 3am just watching videos about all the theories there are in the game. He sorely regrets it the next day because pro-hero work requires him to be fully rested!

He’s ok with the bosses, his team’s really good so he can afford to mess up. Besides, he’s got a super good Zhongli so he doesn’t need to worry too much. He knows the farming routes since he has to do them very often. He’ll still be surprised when he hears there are some daily chests or secret achievements.

He ONLY co-ops with you. He has anxiety and so he can’t even think about playing with other people. Mirio said he’ll play one day so maybe Tamaki might co-op with him, but that’s about it.

Of course, he can log into your account and do your stuff. He’ll do the gacha rolls for you and yes, his luck follows him there too! There have been certain quests that he did for you because you couldn’t do them. You’ll literally sit beside him or lay on him while he plays. He secretly likes having you on his lap, he just won’t say it.

You’re more than welcome to play on his account! Since all his characters have decent builds, you can move the teams around however you want. He can fix that later. He likes to sit and watch you play- especially if it’s a character you don’t have. And no, he doesn’t get jealous. He thinks it's adorable when you gush over (character).

He likes messing with your Serenitea pot. He’ll leave you cute little messages with bushes or flowers or something. He’ll even put your mains together (if he has both characters) next to the tea house!

» Eijirou Kirishima

He heard about the game from Shinsou and Denki and decided to play. He really enjoys it, like it’s one of his favorites and he’s even gotten you to play as well!

He has all the standard banner 5 stars, plus a few of the event ones: Hu Tao, Ganyu, Albedo, Kazuha, and Yoimiya.

The reason he has all the standard banner 5 stars is because he got unlucky on the event banners. He’s lost the 50/50 a few times. For the weapons, he did get the Staff of Homa, Amos’ Bow, Wolf’s Gravestone, and Mistsplitter. So he’s pretty lucky with the weapons. His artifact luck is meh compared to his gacha luck. He needs to work a little bit harder to get decent artifacts.

He tries to save up primos for characters. He doesn’t want to spend too much money (lol) so he’ll work for those primos.

He wants to level up all the characters just cuz, but yeah he has one solid team plus a couple of backup characters for bosses and such. Never know when your pyro main is gonna need to fight a pyro boss.

He likes the lore! He’s not crazy about it, but he does like listening to some theories and coming up with his own. He’s not all that into it though.

He always forgets farming routes. Like he needs to look them up every few days. He always finds secret chests and achievements AND IMMEDIATELY RUSHES TO TELL YOU. He’s ok with the bosses, he really likes the cryo regisvine. It’s his favorite. He’ll uhh find all the “oculi” by accident.

He loves to co-op! He’ll play with strangers, Denki and Shinsou, and even you! He doesn’t mind. He will quit on everyone to spend time with you though! You guys even set up your PCs next to each other so you can play right next to each other. Some days, you’ll lay in bed and play mobile genshin! You two will literally lay on each other- it’s goofy, it just is.

He totally doesn’t mind logging in for you for the day or something. If you can’t get your dailies/weeklies done, he’ll help. He can do events too if you’re that busy but chances are if you’re busy he is too. Besides, he is a pro hero. So more often than not, you’re logging into his account. But if you’re both busy, you’ll ask Denki to help.

Of course, you can play on his account! He’s got two team presets dedicated to you! Use them how you want! You can even mess with his, he’ll just laugh when he logs in and finds something you’ve done.

He also loves it when he logs in and you’ll set up something cute in his Serenitea pot. You two DEFINITELY have a couple’s setup.

[patrickztump]

i really hope it is okay for me to share your tags in a post, you put so much thought and emotion into this that i don't want to simply reply via prev. but you shared some personal notes, and if you want this taken down and left in the tags, please let me know!

i did place it all below the cut for the above reason, but also because it’s quite long 😅

#my favourite song is probably the phoenix #I’m not usually the type to say yeah the hits but like. I’ve heard it a million times and it still gets me so amped #it just goes so hard. every line. but I really love the bring home the boys verse #get hitched make a career outta robbing banks the world is just a teller and we are wearing black #trawled my fob tag from the start to see if I ever posted anything when I first got into them (I did not)

the crazy thing about this album is, i know there are multiple singles, "the phoenix" being one of them, but "light em up" was played relentlessly for years that i never heard another track off this record on the radio. as far as i was concerned for absolute years, the entire thing was essentially deep cuts with one single – which is an insane thought.

i also listened to the commentary on spotify again the other day, and for the band to say "light em up" sets the mood of the album and most of the songs can tie back to that one in some way makes sense. but i really think the song that sets the mood for it is "the phoenix," absolute solid choice for an opening track. very in your face and says, "hey! we're back, re-energized, and won't be stopped!"

#but apparently at some point alone together was my second fav for the got room for one more troubled soul line #idk if I connect so hard to it now #but it’s /always/ been you are what you love not who loves you that’s hit me hardest #I discovered fob about the time I was coming to terms w being ace and that was really so powerful to me at the time (and still is really) #that being different from everyone else in terms of love/relationships wasn’t going to be the end of the world and I could be dfined by more #than just the relationship I had with someone else or whether I had one at all.

both of those lines are disguised as throw away lyrics in a way; in the sense that maybe it takes a few listens to notice and appreciate them, or if you're in just the right headspace and you hear them, it's like a being hit by a train. and they are so relatable on so many different levels for so many different people, because we're all troubled in some way, right? and we all need to be reminded that others do not make us who we are.

#miss missing you is a classic obviously. hot whiskey eyes bend the flame. met a guy with actual hot whiskey eyes in the right light last yea #and was like /damn/ Pete /didnt/ just make that up that is actually a thing and oh my god. #the rest of the song isn’t relevant to the situation but yes I spent much time thinking about that one line. shant say any more on that.

i have yet to see anyone who has eyes that fit that description, but if it's anything remotely close to what my mind envisions i know it must be breathtaking. (closest i have come, however, is a photo i took of canon i believe where the sun was hitting his eye Just Right lol)

#rat a tat is a fun song at the right time.

it took me a little bit of time to truly appreciate "rat a tat" mainly because i wasn't overly fond of courtney love's part. and there's nothing wrong with it or her, i just didn't vibe with it for a long time. but "we're all fighting growing old in the hopes of a few minutes more" is so powerful to me and makes up for her parts. honestly the entire chorus when thinking about it out of context from the song can sometimes tear me up, because we as humans want more time and never notice when we are in moments that become fond memories, so it's a reminder to step back and appreciate what we have right now.

#it is for sure in every way a red album. it’s too upbeat adrenaline goingandgoingandgoing (and blood) for anything else. #(I made the terrible mistake of choosing it as a running album years ago. I fucking hate running and I regret that so much bc hating running #is too tied to the album now that I don’t listen to it much despite how good it is)

okay, side note, have you seen that person on instagram (and i presume tiktok) that makes the treadmill videos with albums, artists, genres, etc? she takes for example taylor swift, makes a playlist of x number of songs (usually around an hour i believe) and you start at a comfortable walk and with each song change you up it .1 mph, .2 mph, whatever you're comfortable with until reaching the middle where you run, jog, brisk walk (again, your comfort) for a song or two, then start dropping the way you went up with song change?

yeah, i need to get back into exercising and was thinking save rock and roll and soul punk would be excellent albums to use for that, but lol i Do Not want to do to them what you just described.

#it’s got some amazing lines in it and is a massive step in every way from Folie. beloved Folie starts sounding the same if you listen to it #for too long. you start hearing why it’s the last gasp of a band breaking down. srar comes out of the gates galloping and beats and beats #and beats the whole time. and then slows down into the title track in a way that feels both like aftercare and a promise of beginnings in a #way that’s so fitting and so good.

i absolutely love and adore folie but you are so right about that. it's my go-to for if i want to suggest a fall out boy album to someone, because it has variety and i think paints a good picture for what the band can do, but it can be worn out over time.

and i couldn't agree more about the closing track. i've said it before and i'll say it again, "the phoenix" is the little brother to "save rock and roll." both are full of determination but "the phoenix" comes out as rage, whereas "save rock and roll" is more settled and wiser.

#so. she’s not my pick (abap was /my/ first fob album) but she is phenomenal and I’m happy to listen to her #herbcitty meows #fob #(had this languishing in my likes for days and days while I listened to srar a hundred more times to formulate a response lol)

and i thank you so much!! i love hearing people's connection with music, because it can be so different but we all share a common thread with it in that it makes us feel something.

“diamonds are a girl’s best friend” wrong. save rock and roll by fall out boy is a girl’s best friend

[athena-is-a-chaotic-lil-shit]

Feral Fatality

(Part 1)

So this has been in my works for a week now. You see, it was a typical day for me scrolling through Tumblr and visiting some....tags, and then a short drabble inspired me to write about a feral reader totally not because I was craving violence and murder no, which reached more than 4k words on the first draft so here we are! Shitty title, I know. The proofread work went over 7k, and it's not even finished yet. Once I'm done posting this and my main orc fic, I will get into the requests so please be patient!

Pairing: Jason Voorhees x Fem!Reader

Word count: 3k

Warnings: Brief blood and violence at the end of the first part

Contains: Swearing, mentions of neglect and abuse (not graphic)

Part 1 Part 2 Part 3

-

Screams slit through the twilight as the frigid autumn wind blew harshly through the trees of Camp Crystal Lake. The rustling of bushes and cracking of twigs echoed as foolish teenagers attempted to escape, running for their lives when they were the ones who dared step foot in the place, tarnishing it with their sins.

Jason Voorhees, the innocent kid who died several years ago; pushed to the lake by his bullies and left to drown for being different and unsightly— all because the counselors were busy with their fucking business—, returned as an undead killing machine right after his mother murdered them and died. His sole purpose: to protect the land and purge the people who had no right to be here, sentencing them to a horrendous death.

One by one, they struck the ground, lifeless, either chopped into pieces, beheaded, or stabbed countless times by his trusty machete.

Limbs...ripped off with his bare hands.

-

The muffled snapping of branches reached your ears as the vehicle's wheels ran over them, stirring you from your nap. You rubbed your chilled skin under your clothes as you looked out of the window, thumping your forehead on the glass when you leaned forward the moment you saw the scenery. Trees, both ancient and young, their leaves varying in hues of green, orange and red, filled your line of sight. It was still early in autumn, your favorite time of the year, not hot but not too cold either. You watched in awe as the warm-colored leaves cascaded down from the branches and down to the ground, some carried by the wind farther from their origin.

The view did its best to distract you from a couple in session a seat before yours. They always seem to do that all the time, regardless of place or occasion.

This was a week-long getaway after graduation, they said.

Nothing but a white lie.

An excuse for the girls to hook up with their campus crushes, a week of fucking and smoking drugs.

You, however, just got invited —forced— by your "friend" Eloiza, the self-proclaimed hottest girl in the entire school, typical captain of the cheerleading squad; blonde and curvy. Her words were much too sugar-coated that even a deaf person could tell she had ulterior motives.

She only planned to use you as a tool to raise her fame. A stepping stone for her own gain.

That wasn't the only reason though.

Everyone knew who you were, but only by your name. News and rumors alike spread like wildfire through gossipy mouths. Your deeds were known throughout campus.

(Y/N)(L/N), top academic competitor and multiple-award winner, a straight-A student for five years in succession. Some believed you were a genius, the rest called you insane.

You wouldn't call yourself a genius though, you did not possess the obsessive need to acquire eternal knowledge and discover the secrets of the universe as most of them do, to effortlessly solve every problem that comes their way.

If that were the case, then you wouldn't be here in the first place.

You only love learning and indulging in the beauty of Mother Nature, plus a handful of hyper-fixations.

Fine, a buttload of hyper-fixations. And such came in handy in various situations.

You were unrivaled, not one of your peers could come close to your level of wit. Many people wished to have a brain like yours, and just as many hated you for even having one, praised you just as much as slandered your name and judged you.

Despite your reputation, the poor school didn't broadcast it, at least every time. The staff probably got tired of repeating the same phrase over and over again. Which caused more than half of the whole campus to never believe you to be the one behind all of that, laughing at your face when you said your name.

"You? The (Y/N) (L/N)? Ha! As if I'd fall for that! Everyone knows how she looks. You're the absolute opposite!"

"You got to be kidding me."

"You're a joker, aren't you? Is this a prank? If so please stop it, don't pretend like you're her."

Yep, and it goes on and on and on. They were right, you didn't look like someone who would win contests or excel in class.

You constantly wore clothes that hid your form, silent unless spoken to or asked to answer, distant and reserved, you preferred the company of books and nature to the rowdiness and prying hands of humans. A sociopath they deemed you. Quite an extreme word to use when you simply wanted to enjoy the only things that made you happy in this living hell.

You only know a handful of people who approached you first-hand and praised you genuinely, even asking for an autograph, which really surprised you.

Yet, they would never understand you even if you explained, because you can't, words evade you when it comes down to voice out what you feel. Even if you can, no one would care. And even if they did? You doubt it was real. Everyone wants to use you, and they seem to believe you'd let them. You didn't trust anyone. The last time you did only left you sobbing on the dirt.

You wanted to be left alone.

To connect with nature and get as far away as possible from your parents. Parents who kept shouting profanities at each other, the main cause for your depression and anxiety levels to skyrocket, the shaking turning into trembling, 7 hours of sleep to barely a blink.

That's why you agreed to go in the first place.

You hated your household—despised it— a mess of broken shards of bottles and ceramics littered your kitchen floor more often than not. You didn't bother cleaning it up anymore, your mother would just waste away her money on more things to break and throw them at your joke of a father when they fought anyway.

Not only that, you thought...No, you believed if you worked hard to be the best and win countless competitions, your parents would give you recognition and reconcile for your sake, but no, no, no. They didn't care one bit about you or your medals, it was as if you were never even included in their lives at all. Even birthday celebrations ceased to exist in everyone's books after your 13th.

So you gave up.

Down into the void, your wishful thinking went, that they'll become better people over time, that the attention and love you deserve will be given one day. Instead, you wallowed yourself in your studies, besting everyone in everything academic. Oh, but you weren't athletic. Far from it. Damn, you were getting thin and sleep-deprived from being neglected, dark circles under your eyes every time you looked at your reflection. People hating your existence wasn't helping, some teachers even suspected you of cheating.

There's no way in hell you'd let yourself get dragged down to end up like them! You were of legal age now, a fresh graduate from high school, you doubt your parents even knew that since they didn't fucking show up on your graduation day. You were moving out of that shithole of a town. Anywhere is better than where they breathed and spat their poison.

And so here you are. Standing in this breath-taking and mysterious place. Camp Crystal Lake, it is named, secluded, barely touched by modernization as it is hidden between mountains and trees as far as the eye could see. Not to mention its namesake, the lake, you imagined it would mirror the sky, be it day or night. You loved it, you adored the fresh, breathable air that went through you the moment you stepped out of the van.

You also knew about him.

Resolved to never go back to that goddamned house, you took everything you had and needed; the special little trinkets you've collected through the years shoved into a box, the few clothes you had, art materials, and your precious books carefully packed inside a big travel bag, along with your stocked up canned goods, convenience food, snacks, and toiletries.

And other, important things.

You hauled your baggage out of the van and got off, immediately moving to the side and away from everyone.

You got used to people ignoring you that you didn't care anymore.

Why waste your time with them when you can have all of it to yourself?

Eloiza led the group into the larger cabins, the others went straight into the lake for a swim. You even notice some teens disappear into the trees, most likely for a quickie.

In return, you stayed out of their way, fully satisfied being invisible and with your own company as you trudged to a cabin, the one you caught a glimpse of earlier in the van. It was a long way's separated from the rest, closest to the forest and hidden behind a few trees.

You were panting when you finally stopped in front of it, clearly not used to walking long distances and carrying stuff near as heavy as your weight.

Upon closer inspection, you found yourself gaping at its appearance. The wooden walls lost their color as they aged, white and brown mushrooms grew on the ground along with green moss sticking to the beams, and a few vines crawling their way up and on the roof. Despite all of that, the cabin looked sturdy still.

There's this "one with nature" vibe that drew you to it, like a string pulling you closer and inviting you. Ominous most would say, but you almost cried when the rich scent of earth and oxygen filled your lungs as you took one big inhale, sighing in content for once. It was a lot smaller compared to the others, but you didn't care. As long as you were left alone with your stuff you were a-okay.

Perfect.

You turned the knob and peeked inside, letting out a small gasp and opening the door wider to see the whole thing.

Old as it is, it was proper and neat, regardless of the tiny cobwebs on the upper corners. A small, square dining table sat in the middle of the first part of the place, two wooden stools placed underneath. There were cupboards on the wall and a simple sink with an empty space to the side. You went to the next room, doorless and separated with but a wall of thick plywood. It had a single bed in the corner, off-white cotton sheets sitting atop, not a wrinkle in sight. No pillow though. There's a decent-sized closet along with a small table on one side of the bed. One of the windows had a hole in the middle, a ray of sunlight streaming in through the cracks. It was too big for the size of a gunshot, so maybe a rock.

A bit hesitant, your fingers traced the wood, feeling the inconsistent texture. When you went through the back door, your smile reached your ears when trunks of trees and bushes greeted you...

Wait, is that what you think it is?

Stepping closer to the treeline, your jaw dropped when you spotted a thicket of fruit-bearing plants past them, gathered in a tiny clearing.

Blueberries.

Purple little cuties poked out of the green shrubs, sporting a vibrant hue that caught your eye. The sun shone overhead and providing the energy they needed. Blueberries managed to grow in the area despite the trees fencing them.

Tempted and suspicious, you crouched down, inspecting the shrub if it really was a blueberry plant and not a deadly doppelganger. Once you were sure it was, (it would be hilarious if you simply died from nighshade poisoning), you plucked one and brought it to your mouth. It was sweeter than you expected, with a slightly bitter aftertaste. You hummed in delight, wiping the juice with your thumb when it dribbled out, staining your finger and lips.

You didn't want to anger anybody. Hell, coming here was already trespassing, so you didn't push your luck and left it alone, hoping they'd forgive you for picking one. They surely didn't look wild with the way they lined up.

You scanned the rest of the area, eventually going back inside to unpack after your little evaluation.

-

The sun was a hand's away from setting when you finished. Pride swelled in your chest at the work you did, your things stocked and organized with care inside the cabinets and drawers. You won't have to worry about your food for now as cupboards were filled to the brim with them. You also had a decent amount of money left from your savings account that your parents weren't aware of. Prize money, allowance, and the salary you got from doing online jobs all went into it. The camp was a few miles off the road, and a couple more to the nearest gas station with a convenience store. Very far yes, but it's better than living with the people who made you do this in the first place.

You just hoped you wouldn't die walking.

Everything was worth it, anyways. You were free now, at least that's what you think.

You trudged to the bed, eyeing the cushions, wary and a little scared to touch the sheets that appeared to be cleaned just recently, you didn't even lay a finger on them ever since you got inside. Oh, but your tired muscles were screaming to just flump down and relax.

So you did.

You dumped yourself face first and inhaled. It wasn't smelly nor fragrant, just the simple freshness on the cotton fabric. You felt beat but ain't sleepy, yet, so you reached to the drawer beside the bed and pulled out a book to pass the time as you waited for the sun to go down and give way for the moon. Its spine and pages had creases, worn out and yellow-stained from age and use. It was a horror-mystery novel told through a first-person narrative, a story of a middle-aged detective and her Maine coon in their attempts to solve a murder case of a young European lady named Cassandra Chase.

You dozed off in the middle of chapter 21, the part where Dinnie, the cat, discovers a valuable clue to the crime, a rotten limb in the dried basement well.

—

—

Jason settled down on the stairs of his porch; shoulders relaxed and hunched as he leisurely sharpened his machete with a small whetstone. Lines of sunlight kissed him through the leaves of trees, the birds in the area chirped on their perches, and the grass swayed, gentle, as a cool wind passed by.

His day be so fine. No troublemakers to deal wi—

The alarm rang, announcing unwelcomed arrival. As if a switch flipped inside, he's already on his feet, making his way swiftly to their location.

A new batch of wretched youngsters, another day ruined. Hunting them down makes his blood thrum in his veins, yes, but they soured his mood, just when he was at peace. He's dead set on slaughtering them in the most gruesome ways possible, only then he could go back and enjoy the serenity the nature around him brings.

He surveyed the area, camouflaging with the wilderness, silent as he watched and counted the soon-to-be corpses, his mother's voice at the back of his mind, guiding him.

They decided to go either to the main cabins, or the lake...even into the trees.

All but one.

Jason already planned to cut down the couple later as they lose themselves in the forest, doing nasty, dirty things to his camp. The killer shifted his attention to you, curious as to why you didn't join the lot. Instead, you walked back down the road. He followed and saw you approach the small cabin, separated from the rest, your eyes widened...

Adoration?

You were quiet— except for the little gasps of awe you let out in between pants—as you looked around and over the place. The ones you came with were rowdy and destructive, a complete opposite. He hid as he observed you from afar, moving around to adjust his vision on you. You smiled every time you looked to the trees, he noticed.

Why were you smiling like that? Why did you pick this cabin? Were you planning on defiling it?

The last question in his mind made his blood boil. He'll kill you first if that was the case. That cabin you chose was special, it was where he and his mother used to stay. He occasionally visits that one to keep it clean and free of dust. If you even think of—

Jason, sweetie...look closer. She does not have such intentions.

His mother's words rang in his head. Even from where he stood, he could see what you did inside. You looked a little hesitant, touching and drawing back your hand before letting your fingers feel the wood as if it was something delicate. Despite the initial...shyness? You proceeded to make it your home, somewhat, dropping the large duffel bags you carried on your front and back, and a similarly large roller case on your left. It was as if you planned to stay for a long time.

Jason hears you take a long breath and sigh as you went out the backdoor. You grinned wider when you saw the nature around you. You stepped forward, straight in his direction...

For a moment he thought you saw him, seeing your jaw drop. You moved closer, and he just froze there, until you crouched down.

Oh, his plants.

He watched you as you gently picked a fruit, your gaze...soft. You brought it to your mouth, some of the juice spilling on the side and you wiped it with your thumb.

Cute.

You went back inside and continued to unpack your things, carefully maneuvering around the cabin.

Maybe he'll spare you if you continue to be good. You didn't do anything dirty, yet. It's only a matter of time before the camp is shrouded in darkness and his hunt will begin.

Let's see what you'll do before that happens.

-

Jason tracked down the three that went into the forest. He knew the place like the back of his hand, and it was easier to pinpoint them as he heard moans.

What he saw was utmost disgusting, two girls pleasuring a male with their mouths in broad daylight.

Kill them, my boy! Such foul beings need to die! Kill them, kill!

He circled them, steps soundless. Jason gripped his machete and brought it down the guy's neck, embedding the weapon into the bark, the head rolled down, oozing with blood, and fell against the women, drenching them in red. Not a single cry left from their mouths as he sliced both with one swing, blood pouring out of their throats and staining the ground. Jason dragged their bodies and tossed them into a pit he dug beforehand, making quick work in burying them.

A swift end. Now he waits.

[xxisxxisxxis]

Gateway Drug | Part Ninety-Three [PT. 1]

Words: 3k

Warning(s): explicit language, drug abuse

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NIKKI

1987

I throw another drink back not long after yelling obscurities at Viv as she stomped out of VIP to leave and go home, between more lines of blow, a trip to the bathroom to get a fix and some drinks, we decide to take the party to Steven's new place. 

"You guys just can't be too loud, though, got it?" He says as sternly as he can as we get inside and he fumbles for his key. 

"Alright, alright, alright," I mumble, stepping inside, grabbing his bottle of Jack off the counter before getting comfortable on the floor by the window. 

We all talk--as best we can--for a little while, Steven and the boys making some calls to get some dealers here, and the only thing on my mind is getting a potent fix, until I hear something...very faint, very familiar...very, very, familiar...I furrow my brows to focus more, ignoring the guys' laughter and voices, my eyes training on the wall opposite of me. 

My subconscious puts it together before my conscious does, like smelling a blanket from a childhood home and immediately being taken back before your brain can quite grasp the feeling. 

Multiple memories shrouding that sound of Vivian that only she can really pull off. 

It doesn't take rocket science equation solving skills to put together why I'm currently hearing her soft, pretty moans carry on next door. 

I'm pretty sure more members of Guns, aside from Steven, are staying here right now. 

Apparently Stevie hears it not long after and slips into the next suite, where the sound is coming from, that's connected to his suite. 

I don't hear it anymore after he gets back in here. 

"Dealer's coming or what?" I ask Steven, my high starting to get blowed from the fact that my wife is next door on her back for someone who isn't me. 

I'd be jealous if I weren't numb to it by now.

"They're all tied up, man." Steven tells me and I groan, thinking for a second. 

An idea comes to mind that makes me want to bang my head against the wall, but I'm desperate and left with no option at this point. 

"I know a guy," I mumble, dragging myself up to the phone in the little kitchen area, reluctantly dialing a number I never wanted to dial again. 

It rings once...twice...three times… 

"Hello?" He answers and I roll my eyes. 

"'Sup man, it's Nikki." I reply, trying to put on my best "friendly" voice, even though it's making my blood boil that the bastard I could see myself killing is ultimately the one that's gonna be able to save the day. 

"Hey, dude." He replies. 

"Me and a few buddies of mine are out here at the Franklin Plaza Suites and need a few things." I rub the back of my neck. 

"Yeah?" 

"Yeah." 

It's quiet, and he reluctantly breathes out. 

"I'll see what I can do." I can hear the satisfaction in his voice that I'm having to call him. 

Within the next forty minutes there's more people here than I'm comfortable with, groupies, and hangerson, and other drug adoring morons, and then my saving grace comes through the door once Steven lets him in. 

Slash is already slipping into a Jack induced stupor. Sally came in a few minutes ago screaming at all of us guys for leaving her at the Cat House. 

We didn't even realize we'd forgotten her. 

She's in the bathroom, probably keeping herself in there to keep from starting an argument with Slash in front of everyone. 

Robbin's on the phone with Laurie.

Apparently it's just in men's nature to get fucked up, call our wives, and profess our undying love for them despite the fact we cheat on them nearly every time we hangout with our friends. 

I wonder what would happen if I went in there on her and Duff right now. 

What would she say? 

Probably nothing. 

She'd just look at the floor and try not to cry, probably. 

What would I do? 

I know that I know what's going on between them, but if I actually walked in and saw them together, caught in the act…

I'd either be a pussy and cry over it, or kill them both--him first and make her watch, and then just slowly torture her or something. God, I'm fucked up. Even though I'm pretty sure being married to me is torture enough to her. 

I know it's torture to me, too. 

"Here dude," Sparkie hands me a syringe and a spoon, and I look at him, too out of focus to concentrate on getting it right. 

"Fix me." I say to him and he scoffs. 

"Okay, dude." He starts getting it ready and I look at that wall again. Staring at it, taking a sip of my drink. 

Fucking Vivian. 

Of course. Her. Of all the women I've hooked up with and dated in my life, she--the most harmless, at least in my dumbfuck mind when I first met her--is the one to screw me over like this. 

And I've let her. 

If I did what Vince does to Sharise and have that whole, "no hanging out with your boy friends without me" rule, this wouldn't even be an issue. 

That's the problem. Somewhere along the way I loosened her leash a little too much and now she's chewed her way through it entirely. 

"You look like you're in hell, you know," Sparkie tells me, fixing the tourniquet around my arm… "But that's okay, you're about to be in heaven in just a few seconds." He assures me. 

I know he's right. I just need to hang on to that. 

In just a few seconds, I'll be--

I hear Vivian, again, and I reach around my neck and grab onto her cross I've been wearing for weeks, now, squeezing it at the sting of the needle going into my skin. 

I feel him shoot me up, my mind waiting to chase and catch the high that I just know is about to come. 

My fingers slip from the crucifix, and I feel myself fall back before a weightless feeling washes over me.

Present

I keep rereading the damn paper, repeatedly, trying my hardest not to throw a fit...

Nikki Sixx and his wife, Vivian, recently confirmed that she is indeed pregnant issuing a simple and straightforward,"Yes, it's true," statement earlier this week through Nikki's manager, and--as speculated--her pregnancy is not with Nikki. Many fans and some friends of the couple are blown out of the water by this sudden turn of events, others who are familiar with the rockstar and his band but never really paid much attention to his personal relationships, are now curious as to who exactly Vivian Sixx is. Well, in an open letter, rumored to be intended for print in Rolling Stone, a few anonymous former roadies of Mötley Crüe--who partook on their Girls, Girls, Girls, tour in 1987--are here to introduce who they saw behind the scenes of flashing cameras and public sweet moments with husband Nikki. 

"This is a letter to Mötley Crüe fans, we're a mere handful of people out of the many who witnessed monstrosities behind the scenes while on tour with the Crüe since Summer of 1987, none of which were caused by the band or any members, themselves, but one woman in particular. We had no reason to really bring any of this up, but in light of recent news, we are disheartened and angered of the betrayal against one of the four men who gave us an opportunity to live several months in our lives that will forever impact us in the best way known, and provide heartwarming memories by the dozen. This is not an attack on Nikki Sixx, especially given his past struggles with opioid addiction, alcoholism, as well as his abusive wife. The first time we met Vivian, she was polite and friendly, but very assertive. It was obvious it would be her way or no way,  and often times she and Nikki would go back and forth with who was running things. It was obvious Nikki was unwell at times, whether it'd be hungover, sick from withdrawal or simply tired from a show the night before. Vivian would choose these times when he was at his most exhausted to pick fights with him. He'd tell her to go away or 'f**k off,' and she'd continue to verbally and mentally beat him down more than he clearly already was. When Rolling Stone came to interview the band shortly after the wild rumor Vanity started publicly, we were told Vivian had tried to physically attack the reporter working on the story, simply because he made the comment that Pepsi wasn't good for her. Small things like that would often set her off, leaving security, managers, and band members to try to dodge fists while pulling her off of her unsuspecting victim, who was typically Nikki. Many times we'd hear them arguing in the hotel rooms, dressing rooms, bathrooms, tour bus, etc., usually followed by sounds of what we can only describe as 'pitchy, hungry, pornstar moans' on her part--clearly using her body to get back in his good graces after wearing him down. After their fights, Nikki would always have a bottle of alcohol on hand, some kind of drug, and would keep to himself. Our comradery with him soon began to dwindle with each month because it was obvious she was beginning to suck the life out of him. He was more introverted overtime, and higher more often than he was at the beginning of the tour. It really got bad when Guns N' Roses came on tour for a month, because Vivian's attacks on him and the other members of Mötley Crüe, began to pop off as randomly and explosively as fireworks. We'd witness some foul exchange (brought on by Vivian)  between her and Nikki backstage, either verbal or physical, nearly every night. People can talk down on the Crüe for being bad boys, but they've shown everybody that's helped them on tour, gratitude. All the wives and girlfriends that would come on that we'd offer food and drinks to would always express gratitude with a smile and a warm heart, but Vivian would always stay silent and cold towards us. She's a trashy, bitchy, whiney, hateful, spiteful, conniving, plotting python that now has her cold-blooded grasp around not only Nikki's neck, but also Duff's. Her game is to find the most well rounded guys while maintaining under her guise that she's a kind, Christianly woman, and see how far she can push them until they work themselves to death, literally, with trying to please her. We aren't surprised that she's pregnant, she probably video taped herself conceiving the damn thing and sent it to Nikki. We hope she did so it can be practice  for her inevitable low-budget porn career when she runs out of rockstars to f**k and kill, as we've mentioned, she already sounds like one in the throws of passion. Anyway, Nikki, we're hoping you decide to kick her aside and start fresh. Duff, get a paternity test, dude. Crüe fans, don't let that red-headed bitch fool you."

"Who the hell is Page Six to give these bastards a platform in the first place, Doc?!" I snap.

"Nikki, I am handling it, I'm on it--"

"--You tell the L.A. Times and Rolling fucking Stone if they take this shit and run with it, too, I'm personally coming to their offices and fucking them up. Not the publications themselves, but the people trying to put this out there in print, individually." I hiss.

"Nikki, just--" 

"--And who the hell--what roadies did this?!" 

"I don't know, Nikki, but I'm trying my hardest to get it cleaned up." He assures me. 

"'She's a trashy, bitchy, whiney, hateful, spiteful, conniving, plotting python that now has her cold-blooded grasp around not only Nikki's neck, but also Duff's. Her game is to find the most well rounded guys while maintaining under her guise that she's a kind, Christianly woman, and see how far she can push them until they work themselves to death, literally, with trying to please her'?!" I read that snippet, just so he can be reminded how fucked this is, trying my hardest not to start pitching a fucking fit. 

"Fucking AJaxx isn't even cleaning this up! Press mongrels are gonna be humping these bastards legs for giving them sales for the next nine months!" I outburst. 

"Sixx, don't worry about it, alright? It won't go past this shitty Page Six story, okay?" 

"It's fucking horse shit." I ignore him, trying to keep my cool. "Fuck." I kick at the leg of the table, running a hand through my hair.

"I guess one decently positive thing is that Viv doesn't know about this," he says next and I shake my head a little, feeling a migraine starting to come on, strong. 

I was tempted then to check myself out of rehab and 'handle' it myself, but decided it wouldn't be worth it. I hoped it would go away and it would all blow over eventually.

"Vivian, don't listen to any of it, alright? Me and you and everyone on that tour know damn well it wasn't just you being a bitch and us being the innocent victims." I say through the phone as Viv tries to calm down, her breathing shaky and ragged from crying so much. 

"I know that but the fans and other people don't know that." She says to me, her voice quiet and tired. "I'm so embarrassed, Nikki." She adds. "I'm already embarrassed that everybody knows I cheated on you but now this whole thing…" she trails off and I feel guilt tug at my heart. 

I don't know what the fuck to say. 

I'm used to criticism from the press, but none of them have tore into me or any of the guys--except Vince after the Razzle accident--so personally and extensively as they're tearing at her. 

Calling me a devil worshipper and saying my music is shitty gets annoying and frustrating and even infuriating at times, but attacking my wife and calling her a low budget porn star and telling me to kick her aside? 

Fuck that. 

"I'm sorry, Viv. I really am." I assure her, honestly, closing my eyes when I hear her stifle a little sob out. "Where are you at right now?" I ask. 

"Duff wanted me to meet his family." She tells me. "I'll be back Saturday." 

I'm relieved she actually has a reason for not being here, but I'm also hurt that she didn't give me a heads up. But I don't want to talk about it right now. I think she's been punished enough today. 

"Okay...you didn't show yesterday and I was just worried." I admit. 

"I know, it was just a spur of the moment thing. He asked me last week and I didn't think it'd be an issue." 

"Oh." 

I glance around and let out a breath. 

"I, um, I'm gonna go. I got a group thing with the guys at 3:00." I tell her. 

"Okay." 

"Are you gonna be okay or do I need to break out and kick someone's ass?" I ask her, half-joking, and she laughs, making me smile. 

"I'll be okay." She tells me. 

"I'll see you next week, Sixx." 

I can practically hear the smile in her voice when she says, "see you next week." 

We hang up and I rub my lips together, taking a few deep breaths before heading to where me and the guys meet with Amber three times a week now. 

Tommy and Vince are waiting for me, and I plop down beside them, leaning forward, elbows on my knees, hands running over my face…

"Psst," Tommy nudges me and I look at him as Vince gets up to grab a cup of coffee. 

"What?" I ask him, and he puts his finger over his mouth. 

"You seen the shit they're on Vivian for?" He whispers and I furrow my brows, looking around. 

"The room is empty except us, dude, why are you--"

"--Shh," he says. 

"Why are you whispering?" I finish my sentence. 

"Because they probably have this motherfucker bugged out the ass." He replies, glancing around again. "I'm thinking of breaking outta here, man." He whispers very, very quietly. 

"You do know we're not being held here by legal obligation, right? They won't chase us down and have the cops on us if we just check ourselves out." I point out and he furrows his brows a little. 

"Oh." 

"Why do you wanna 'break out'?" I ask. 

"I miss Heather and my dogs and I wanna be able to be there Viv, dude. She fucking needs us right now and we're, like, over an hour away--disconnected from shit. I mean we wouldn't even know what the fuck was going on in the world if Doc wasn't keeping us in the loop, ya know?" 

I think about it for a second. 

"We're over a month into our three month stay, dude." I state. "We can't just throw in the towel, now." 

"I don't mean ditch it and stay gone. I just mean check out for a few days, go back home, see what all is going on and come back." He shrugs. 

It seems oddly appealing. 

Way too appealing, actually. 

"I don't know, Tommy…" I rub the back of my neck.

"I already talked to Vince about it and he's down."

"Of course he is." 

"And we wouldn't be doing it tomorrow or anything. I'm thinking next week." 

"Does Doc know?" I ask. 

"Fuck Doc." He scoffs. 

"Agreed." I nod, chuckling. 

"So, you in or not, man?" 

"Just for a few days?" 

"Just for a few days." 

"Then we're all coming back in?" 

"Like we never left to begin with." 

"No drugs, no parties, not even alcohol." 

"Just spending time with our families and then back to the grindstone." He states. 

"...I'm in."

 ...You know when you're on a shitty diet, eating boring, tasteless, "healthy" food, and then decide you've been stuck to your diet long enough that you can have one slice of cake because you're disciplined enough to control yourself? And now, two years later, you're still telling yourself you'll get back on your diet because after that slice of cake you just said, "fuck it," and never thought about forcing yourself to eat lettuce again? Let's just say leaving rehab prematurely works the same damn way.

[imo-chan-imagines]

『 Haikyuu!! Week 2020 | Day 2 』

· Sept. 26th → One Ball, Heart and Soul ·

Characters: Sawamura Daichi, Testurou Kuroo, Bokuto Koutarou, Ushijima Wakatoshi, Oikawa Tooru, Terushima Yuuji

Prompts: A. favourite position/role + B. travel/journey

Tags/warnings: Haikyuu!! (anime), PG, fluff, crack, headcanons, HaikyuuWeek2020

A/N: I found it so hard to pick a favourite position/role, because they're all so interesting and important, and I love everyone 😭 But I settled on the role of captain because of the headcanons I thought of. Captain Sqaud, assemble! So, want to find out what these boys are like on a road trip?

(Just to be clear, I do love all these guys. None of this is hate 😂) All my Haikyuu Week 2020 posts will be SFW, but I have some NSFW stuff on my blog, too. Feel free to check that out~ Thanks for reading! Please enjoy ♡ Imo~

☆ Sawamura Daichi ☆

Dad-chi™

Comes prepared with all the food, drinks, snacks, med kit, camera – literally everything you could possibly need on a road trip

Plans out the route beforehand down to the tiniest detail nothing gets past this man

As well as multiple backup routes in case there's diversions etc.

Plans for regular breaks at two-hour intervals where everyone can pee, stretch their legs, buy anything they need, etc.

He's the one who's driving he's not letting anybody else get a scratch on his van, lmao

And he's good at it

No speeding he's a cop, y'all but he doesn't dawdle either, no running red lights, turns corners well, keeps an even foot on the gas, etc.

Just a good time, tbh

Nobody is getting car sick because of him that would be a damn disgrace

"Stop fighting right now, or I'm turning this van around"

And will actually do it if you don't stfu, lmfao

Don't even think about making a mess and dropping your rubbish in the van you'll be walking home

Everyone else thinks his music is boring and for old people, but Daichi honestly doesn't care

Besides, it's either that or no music at all, because he needs to concentrate on the road

He takes this shit seriously. People's lives are in his hands, dammit!

☆ Testurou Kuroo ☆

Likes to switch between driving and riding shotgun/being designated navigator

Is fairly decent at both

Is constantly eating something but, like, he probably doesn't even know what it is

Some kind of edible is shoved towards his mouth by whoever's riding shotgun, and in it goes shut up. Not like that, you cretins 😂

Somehow manages to behave like an overbearing grandparent and an overexcited child at the same time?? Nothing new there, I guess 😂

I'm sorry, Kuroo, I love you. Please don't be mad 😭

Has a banging playlist full of throwback songs from the 90s and early 2000s

Drums along sofly on the steering wheel or dashboard constantly

HATES driving in rain he's low-key terrified he's going to aquaplane

Likes driving with the windows wound down and feeling the wind in his hair

Will plan the route, but then forget to save it/print it off, etc.

Cannot work Google Maps or SAT-NAVs to save his life Kenma, please help him

Actually packs properly balanced meals, but is heavy on the snacks, too

You'd think he'd drive too fast, but he's actually really responsible

Constantly telling dad jokes to try and keep people amused the groaners are the best

Would probably fight someone at the gas station if they started being a dick and causing trouble

Kuroo, baby. I love you, but please don't get arrested 😭😂😭

☆ Bokuto Koutarou ☆

Dear God, do NOT let him drive leave it to Akaashi, I'm begging you

Has really bad spacial awareness in a vehicle and drifts all over the place

Probably speeds without even knowing it, too

Likes to ride shotgun, but is a terrible navigator, so is nearly always made to ride in the back

Is the loud one that moves around too much and blocks the rear view mirror strap him in tight, Akaashi

Belts along at the top of his voice to whatever music is playing, he's not fussy

Was told to pack essential items in his backpack and proceeded to fill it with sweets and snacks and a pack of condoms??? and thought he did good

Bokuto: Bro, you said they were essential

Akaashi: NOT FOR EVERY SITUATION

Rarely ever has to pee, but when he does, it's always miles away from any service station, and he has to hold it for hours

Has definitely peed at the side of the road multiple times because he couldn't hold it any longer, but he wasn't even embarrassed as numerous cars zoomed past

Likes sticking his head out the window like a dog on the motorway which gives everyone else heart attacks

Like, get the hell back inside you maniac 😭

If the car has a sunroof, he's 100% standing up through it with his hands in the air just you try and stop him

And they will. Everyone will try

"HORSES!!"

Will get out of the car in traffic jams to find out what's going on and end up chatting with random strangers until it starts moving again

And he's very sad when he has to leave his new friends. Droopy hair and emo Kou for the next 2 hours :(

Unironically enjoys playing 'I Spy' for hours at a time

Is a bit much to handle in such a confined space for hours on end, but he's just so excited for the road trip

Will fall sound asleep in a matter of minutes if you set him up with a travel pillow and it's freaking adorable!!

☆ Ushijima Wakatoshi ☆

No music whatsoever it's distracting. Why would he want it?

Okay driver, brilliant paper-map navigator

Will sit and do absolutely nothing but stare out the window the entire trip if he's neither

Breaks too hard and accelerates too fast, though

Is also kind of heavy-handed with the gear stick he may or may not have snapped one off before...

Never give him a SAT-NAV, though, because he will follow the directions with 100% accuracy and end up driving through a wall or some shit don't try and deny it

Does he ever even blink when he's looking at the road? We may never know

Might be astral projecting, who knows

Forgets people need toilet breaks but refuses to make unscheduled stops

"Just hold it in"

Uh-huh, sure. That's how that works, Toshi

No snacks

Or rather, no fun snacks. Protein bars and mineral water all the way, babyyyy 🙃🙃🙃

Could probably drive all through the night without taking any breaks but that's irresponsible

Don't do it, kids

Will likely devour the entire KFC menu at the service station he's big, okay? He eats a lot

Is prone to leg cramp after long drives oh look, he needs a massage 😏

Doesn't get car sick. Ever. Upset stomachs are for the weak

Has garbage and recycling pouches on the backs of the front seats use them correctly, or feel his wrath

Isn't exactly a barrel of laughs, but it's somehow endearing just like always *happy sigh*

But it's actually a good thing

There's no hidden side to Ushi or any bad or annoying habits that come out of the woodwork on a long road trip

He's just the same old reliable, adorably straightforward Ushijima ❤

☆ Oikawa Tooru ☆

Calls shotgun and demands the aux cord every. Single. Time but it's pretty decent music, so no-one really complains

Not that he's any good at navigation pray for Iwa-chan

Is constantly taking selfies, making TikToks, and documenting the trip on his social media

#ROADTRIP #SQUAD GOALS #BETTER THAN YOU

Will send all the photos in the group chat when it's over, and they actually come out pretty well

Will not stop complaining if the air conditioning is busted and Iwa-chan will threaten to dump him in the middle of nowhere if he doesn't can it 😂

Iwa-chan: I shoulda left you on that street corner where you were standing

Oikawa: But'cha dIDN'T

Bonus points if you get that reference, lmao

Has to keep taking breaks because his butt hurts when he sits down for too long because it's fLaT

I'm sorry, Tooru 😭😭 Forgive me. I love you, really

Is constantly on his phone

But he points out pretty views and interesting sights to everyone all the time awww

Low-key needs to pee all the time, but gets defensive if someone brings it up please stop bulling him, travelling is hard

"Are we there yet?"

Seems kind of annoying, but is actually just genuinely excited to go on a road trip and spend time with his friends 😭😭

Buys matching souvenirs for everyone in secret to surprise them with 🥺

When people complain about all the photos, souvenirs, and enthusiasm, etc. and ask why he has to keep doing it, Oikawa says:

"I want to remember as much of this as possible. I want us all to remember as much of this as much as possible," with a sweet little smile 😭😭😭

And that's when everyone realises how mean they've been to him about being over-the-top and irritating, and they all feel terrible

Just like in the freaking anime, man

☆ Terushima Yuuji ☆

Will hijack the aux cord to play his incredibly niche music taste

Feet up on the dashboard when he rides shotgun

Shoes on is bad enough, but shoes off just stinks up the entire car you have to roll all the windows down, lmfao

Will break all sorts of road laws if you let him behind the wheel please don't

Daichi will come and arrest him 😭😭

Lives on energy drinks

That's all the drinks he packs. Nothing else

Travels in sports wear and sliders yes, even though you reallly shouldn't drive in sandals

Like he knows or cares 😭

Will chat to girls at the gas station and ask for their numbers, even though he's never going to see them again

"You never know, man! It could be, like, fate or something"

Yes, Yuuji, you do. And it's 'or something'

Thinks it's a good time to sext his current booty call because, like, he has hours of free time. What else is he going to do?

Probably forgot to pack actual food

Has to live off of snacks and cheap service station food for the duration of the trip

But not his own snacks, of course. Everyone else's one doesn't keep friends and buy one's own snacks

Genuinely doesn't realise if he's being gross or annoying, so let him down lightly like a bro and he'll probably make an effort to stop

Doesn't plan the route or anything, even if he's driving. Just punches it into Google Maps as he sits his ass down on the day and trusts it to get him there in one piece and on time

Entire Johzenji team: Yea, though I walk through the valley of the shadow of death...

For some reason knows how to change a flat tire, though, so he's good for something, I guess 😂😂

Probably saw a YouTube video on it. Maybe a WikiHow article

Somehow still manages to be an endearing part of the trip??

He smiles a lot and makes a lot of jokes, particularly when things go wrong, so it keeps everyone's spirits up

It definitely wouldn't be the same without him

© imo-chan-imagines 2020

[bumblewarden]

First! Your tags are so right! Every Warden-Companion configuration of them is sooo much fun. The solidarity in "nobody asked them but damn if they're going to let the world fall to shit while they can do anything about it" when they're both companions. But also the unchallenged loyalty of only one of them being a Warden and the other choosing to follow them against the Blight despite lacking their protections from it!! The Garahel and Isseya of it all of them both being Wardens!!!!

Imagine for one second though the heartbreak for Cyrion if they both become Wardens (does that imply a triple wedding? oh dear oh dear hopefully one of them was just wedding party bc that's too much). They both tried to take sole blame and got dragged away by the Wardens. Bad timing :(

Also, when both are companions, they probably give similar approval drops and gains (those similar values striking again!) so i'd be curious where they differ. Even if Astala isn't strictly a fan of the Chantry, she's much less opposed than Novhen. Novhen might also give greater approval gains for general skulduggery. Another spot they might differ is blood magic. Idk Astala's exact thoughts on it, but he wouldn't disapprove unless it harmed an innocent. To him, it's just a tool like any other (So Merrill would be in the clear but not, say, Caladrius. That guy's in his crosshairs before he even brings up the blood magic)

With Warden Astala-Companion Novhen, another thing i've thought of to look out for is that while his companion verse is a lot under construction, one thing that's fairly consistent is that he's present at Ostagar and recruited in Lothering. For that timeline to work, he would not be able to be present for the wedding, but that could all be worth it for a reunion under only slightly apocalyptical cirumstances with her twin brother whom she may not have seen in months

Also! The "this hair turned gray when" routine seems like it'd be super funny. I can't decide if it's better if there's any overlap between Valendrian's last days pre-gray and these two's shenanigans or not, but Cyrion obviously would have that overlap. Baby Novhen might be a little innocently insufferable about it tho on account of the 'tism XD

Novhen: But, hahren, that hair was already gray when we did that. Valendrian: Do you know that for a fact? Novhen: Yes. I was there.

As for how there's only two of them, maybe Adaia had difficulty conceiving? I've already implied there was a considerable gap between her marriage and pregnancy in one of my fics, and irl a lot of people with difficulty conceiving end up at a higher chance for having multiples when they do give birth. Yes, that's just a consequence of how current fertility treatments work, but we don't know what knowledge Fereldan midwives possess! Either way, she got lucky with her twofer. That or just hesitance to have kids because of financial stress and how they keep collecting their cousins might be the most pleasant answers

In his canon, Novhen was a bit of a ringleader as a kid. This could very well result in some early power struggles that may temper Astala's attitude some, but it's also a possibility that he would frequently take a role not unlike a chancellor whispering in a king's ear. The adults will find it a bit amusing when you have little Astala trying to make them agree to something then her shadow leans in to whisper something and she suddenly spouts another condition or compromise

I imagine hide and seek was not typically allowed to leave the alienage, and when they did sneak out, they didn't stray too far. But after Adaia's death, for those two days, he was decidedly outside of the alienage, so finding him would be a real task :( Thankfully, he does come home of his own will, but only because dehydration was setting in

Re: Adaia's disappearances. In Novhen's canon, the first would have happened no later than 9:25 to get her in position for Leliana's Song, and the second where she died was in the summer or fall of 9:25. We can kick these dates around a bit if need be to help align with your canon (or toss in a third disappearance if need be 👀)

And honestly, if the kids get a little too attached after her final disappearance, it's probably still better than what happened in his canon. For a good while, he fell into a pit of alcohol abuse and dissociation and lost his sense of self-preservation. I don't think the cuddles would fix that exactly, but it may make the landing less painful. Unfortunately, he's too dissociated to be much good for helping her keep the household afloat, but he may start stealing more to help cover necessities. It's not an ideal solution, but it's what he does

As for heights, Novhen is about 5'0 or 152cm! Converters never directly equate those two, but i'm pretty sure there is a narrow range where they overlap. Funnily enough, i hc most elves range between 5'0-5'5 with a very small (compared to humans) standard deviation, and little-to-no gender-based difference, so they've got the lion's share of the range between them lol. Of course, that headcanon is not vital for shoving these two into twinhood. Just some fun trivia :D

He would be Astala's biggest enabler. She would wonder aloud if she could climb to the top of the vhenadahl in under a certain amount of time, and he would immediately volunteer to count. It's a good thing they existed in a time before smartphones and Vine. Forget about the headaches they're giving their parents and elder, think of poor Soris!

He's also a bit of a mama's boy, so when he was inclined to disobey (which to be fair probably wasn't nearly as often, he's more a loophole guy), it would usually be against Cyrion or Valendrian. If Adaia is the one telling him he can't let any of them climb the vhenadahl, then he might actually try to dissuade her in that case. That said, quiet kids can definitely cause trouble of their own when the mood strikes (see: that time Novhen stole Valendrian's shield but he promises it was for a very important game and he was gonna give it right back once he was done!)

They probably did wrestle quite a bit! Especially when Adaia was unavailable, it's a fun way for them to practice. And then they keep inventing new variations of the game like only being able to use one arm! His favorite variation is blindfolded until Astala realizes he's been cheating by keeping his eyes open under the blindfold. She'd never let him suggest that again XD That might be something that leads to less-voluntary wrestling, but he should've rouged better if he didn't want that to happen ¯\_ (ツ)_/¯

Also, i am imagining Mama Astala hovering over his rogue lessons one day when she gives her reminder that carrying weapons is not to be taken lightly, and the kids look over to Novhen like "C'mon, Uncle, tell her she's wrong" but then he agrees with her! The betrayal!!!

The in-game presentation of UITA has to be an underestimation of how many elves are in the hospice. From memory, there were probably like 6ish people across 3 cages, each with a full 5 square feet to themselves like they're living in the Forgotten Realms. More realistically, there was probably just one cage (metal is expensive) packed far denser than healthy (they aren't going to care about the welfare of their captives more than enough to keep them just barely alive (and even that's a maybe). Novhen would not have taken the moment to consider trampling as a possibility, so hopefully he can sweep (sweeping is good) Cyrion out of the way as soon as possible and control the traffic enough to make sure no one is hurt any further

Polyamory seems to be accepted in Thedas, but one person dating two people related to each other would probably still be taboo. If they're both Wardens and Novhen cottons on to that Astala has even the slightest interest in Zevran, he'll back off. (So in that case, it's really just a matter of who's more obvious first. If it's her there will still be the price of him teasing her for her crush tho lol.) If Novhen's not a Warden but Astala is, i doubt he'd make a move towards Zev. There is a way for him to become involved with Zev as a companion, but the method is only available to non-City Elf Wardens

It does do him great relief to hear she's not diving in immediately tho XD XD (Tbh he probably starts dating him sooner on his timeline, but what's a little hypocrisy now and then? He'll insist he's only allowing himself to do it after Zevran's proved he won't take the opportunity to kill him when he could've gotten away with it scot-free but c'mon, man. A little more reservation would not be misplaced.) If it's been that long, he might still question her about that but it will involve much much less eyebrow raising. By that point, Zevran would be pretty well integrated into the group, and even Novhen would forget to keep his guard all the way up around him. That doesn't mean Zevvo will be escaping his grilling though. It may not be a marriage but if he's to be going to be family, he's going to need to survive an interview or two! I'm sure Zev'll take it in good humor tho lol

With Morri, Novhen's as confused as anyone. He can't help liking bad boys (gender neutral). There are the elements to contend with that there were no other elves in the party at the time and that as a Warden, it's not like he can marry anyway. It started as a distraction on both of their sides, but then the fools caught feelings. I'm sure you can figure out which of them realized they had it bad first, but he's too much a romantic to have avoided it XD Realistically, i don't think they would have started seeing each other if he weren't a Warden because 1) an accidental pregnancy could mess up everything and 2) there's no use in getting him used to taking off his pants for her if she can't use him for the ritual

"Granted, she would at first be a bit confused as to what Novhen sees in Morri" She's not the only one! She and Alistair (and most of the camp honestly) should start a club! But also i can only imagine how Morrigan would react to being sat down XDXD I hope Astala can time it right to get it in at a time where she can't turn into a bird and fly away

But Astala having his back and "if she hurts Novhen, she'll also have a problem with Astala" ohoho now that is a delightful avenue to explore. Because while Morrigan decidedly did not *physically* him, that was one hell of a break up she put him through at the end of the game. There's not much Astala can do at that point to her, and he'd make it clear that he wouldn't want any harm to come her way, but i think having Astala around would do so much to help him cope with the break up. He ends up holding it in way longer than is healthy in canon but that's because his options to talk it out with were A. Alistair (hates her guts), B. Zevran (would probably be willing to talk but Novhen won't even broach it because it'd be such an awkward position to put him in! Novhen dumped him for her!), C. his subordinate Wardens (feels like an inappropriate topic for commander and soldier), or D. his family in Denerim (yeah, he's not confessing to them that he got involved with a shem and got his heart broke- oh! and also she was pregnant. congrats on being a grandpa now btw, Da, not that either of us will ever meet the kid). So yeah, i think having Astala around would give him the outlet he needs to come to terms with it in a healthy manner ^_^

I think Vhen would be a funny nickname (especially especially while with the Dalish >v<), and that's the thing about siblings is they can't really say no to each other's nicknames XD With respects to elven linguistics and the elements put into his name, i feel like Novris would be the logical nickname, but who said logic matters here? Vhen is fun, and that's what he gets for being so caught up in the old ways

I think that honestly Broken Circle was what shook him the most. The Blight was horror after horror, so it was far from the only thing to get to him, but it was custom-made to emotionally ensnare him 😔 And also!!! I just remembered how i was definitely planning to heavily imply when i wrote that he meets Adaia's actual spirit in the Fade! She actually stays with Warden Novhen for most of the sequence! Sweet Maker, that's definitely going to be one for the fireside feelings talks

So!! I've been wanting to do this for a while, but life got in the way, so now I'm here to take that thing up again because!!! Fun!!!! This is about the relationships between OCs, and I don't want to impose anything but. Regarding how Novhen and Astala would get along:

What if they HAD grown up together? Maybe not in the same family (although, it would be fun 👀👀👀👀👀👀 they are very similar and very different from each other in different aspects. For example both are very loyal and community oriented, but also Astala is loud and boisterous while Novhen is quieter and more underhanded), but definitely the same Alienage. They'd know each others' quirks and habits. Maybe Novhen got frustrated with Astala because she'd always hide in these really obvious spots when playing hide and seek and Astala in turn would never be able to find Novhen? Maybe Novhen would at some point have stolen a plum tart for her and maybe Astala would've helped him against another kid who made fun of Novhen? Maybe, if we wanted them to meet up later during the Blight, Astala had to move away from Denerim at some point. I think she's a bit older than Novhen; maybe she got married elsewhere. Or, if not, now we gave more elves storming Vaughan's estate, which is alwats fun. I think Novhen would get to lead that one operation until Nelaros's death, because before that, stealth does seem to be the best option.

I think these two would get along well, differences aside. Astala would make an effort to lower her if needed, and having a familiar face to lean on during the Blight year would probably be a big comfort to them both. I think they'd be comfortable enough with each other to talk about the recruitment and how it didn't exactly happen willingly; they could gripe about nobles and politics; they could just. Sit in silence after Broken Circle and try and digest Sloth's nightmare. They could kill the slavers at the Alienage together!!! I think having a like-minded person from the same cultural background would help enormously.

One thing Astala probably wouldn't be on board with is the Cult of Fen'Harel. She'd let Novhen practice alright and defend him if accusations about this were levelled against him, but I think she would either have fallen out of it if she'd ever been introduced to it (it didn't save Adaia after all, so...), or never warmed up to the idea of this elvhen trickster god

These are my thoughts as far as they go. What do you think? Also I hadn't thought of it, but if you want to move this conversation to DMs, they're open ^^

(And if this doesn't tickle your fancy anymore, feel free to ignore ^^)

👀👀👀👀👀 I am eating this ask up like breakfast. Or, er, ramen. Which is the thing i am actually eating atm. But yes yes yes to all of this, i love it so much

Full response under the readmore for length, but i'm realizing now my response is mostly about them as kids 😅 Oops

[Ask Game]

The way i play with companion!Novhen, i'd assume he and Astala are probably either siblings or cousins (i waffle), except this time on their mothers' sides. I don't know Astala's exact age, but Novhen was born in *pulls out notes* Wintermarch of 9:7 Dragon. If we try to stagger them based on Adaia's death, that's probably close to a decade between them which seems a tad bit higher than it should be. We'll just have to dance around that matter

Even if Astala isn't significantly older, there's probably never a single moment where he's taller than her XD Add onto that that girls tend to hit puberty first, there's gonna be quite the height difference around age 10

But yes, their personalities go in very different directions but are probably pretty compatible, especially if given the benefit of a shared childhood! They're both very sociable, but i suspect most people like Astala more, especially authority figures. She's much less of a troublemaker, and Novhen definitely took a while to come into his own as a social mastermind. (This also would make her the ideal candidate for a distraction whenever Novhen’s a-scheming. That’s gonna do her a lot of favors when trying to get him to steal plum tarts for her XD These two are the real blight as far as anyone in the alienage is concerned XDD)

Oh, actually! If they knew each other, i can imagine pretty well him practicing with or studying Astala to get better at social situation! And clearly it worked! (A: "Ok now make an angry face... You just look like you can't find a chamberpot. You have to scrunch your eyebrows like this." *jams her thumb down his forhead*)

Astala seems to prefer her hair shorter during the Blight, but how was it as a child? Because if it were in some sort of puff, i can imagine her child-level object permanence resulting in her hiding in an empty barrel with the puff still peeking over the top! (Artist's Rendition Below)

I don’t think he’d be too frustrated with her poor stealth outside of team games at least! (If they’re partnered is another story…) He does sometimes tease her that she’s not going to be a very good criminal when she gets bigger. Idk, how would she respond to that? Because how does she feels about the fact that she's not going to follow in her mother's footsteps (or how aware of that she'd be as a child) or maybe she would retort about how she’s already bigger or something else? Definitely a lot of ways to take that one lol

But also the idea of Novhen as alienage king of hide and seek is kinda cute. He's usually the last one left (all that damn thief training), so it’s not unheard of to see a parade of Astala, Shianni, Soris, and whoever else they've wrapped into their game (which with Astala could be quite a number) turning the alienage upsidedown to find him. There's probably at least one time he gets found in the first minute, and he thinks he's going to die of embarrassment. Because of that, they almost never let him be a hider in the first round. Sometimes when he’s hiding, they'll accidentally pick up seekers who weren't even playing along the way because they want to see him knocked down a peg XD That's what happens when you win too much!

Astala probably has him beat at wrestling tho! And the game where i imagine they’re most evenly matched would be arm wrestling. As an archer, Novhen has insane upper body and especially shoulder strength, but Astala has insane everywhere strength

On the less competitive side, imagine them as dance partners as little kids ☺️ Astala’s probably the more enthusiastic one about it, but i’d imagine she could drag him into it Easy whether through blackmail or Ole Reliable (puppy dog eyes). There have to be lots of events in the alienage that call for dancing, so it’s good to have a go-to dance partner! And if they ever get a Silly Urge while dancing, the one thing that i’ve found little kids most reliable to do is spin so fast they nearly make themselves sick, and when there’s two of them spinning each other, there’s no stopping them until the centrifugal force throws them both to the ground. At least they’re having fun lol

The Cult of Fen'Harel thing makes sense. I wouldn't expect Astala to be into that. I imagine in this case that Cyrion and Adaia agreed to expose the children to both sets of beliefs, so they could choose once they got older

It's a good thing Novhen's good at keeping matters hush because otherwise Astala would likely get stuck constantly mediating between Novhen and Ilanlas on matters of religion 🤭

Tbh Novhen would slightly begrudge her for choosing the Chantry, but i don't think he'd ever let her know if he could help it. It's just not worth it, and you can't talk about that without talking about Adaia's death which nobody is excited to talk about. Still, it's a potential source of drama, esp as the politics of DA:D are winding up

Back in the present day, if the endgame configuration is one where they live in the same location (which i think could only be the case if they were both companions), Novhen would offer her once for him to educate her child/ren in the way of the Cult of Fen'Harel and/or the Vir Banal'ras fighting style, probably get denied at least on the first one, and never bring it back up. He knows she's Andrastian and also wouldn't expect her to teach them that fighting style herself (too rogue-based), but if he had permission, he'd want to at least try to expose them to their family's traditions, so they could make a choice themselves like Novhen and Astala did

And honestly, if he's present for the origin, once Nelaros dies, Novhen would more than happily hand leadership of the mission over to Astala. Stealth only goes so far, and she has first dibs on revenge #SupportWomen

And with Unrest in the Alienage! As soon as Caladrius is dead, Novhen is scampering over his corpse to pick the lock on Cyrion's cage. Doesn't even wait for someone else to pilfer the key. Astala is free to react to that little scene however she wishes, and we get the whole Tabris family reunion after

Whoever’s Warden, i imagine those two leaning on each other a lot for emotional support during the Blight because not only are they the only alienage elves in the party, they’re family (or at the least childhood friends). Once we personalize the Broken Circle dreams, they get upsetting fast. If either of them get sent into that mission (or Maker forbid both of them), they’re definitely going to need to share a blanket by the fire for a minute

EDIT: the paragraph looks like it's been eaten but also! Novhen would be very cautious about Astala's Zevran romance at first. ("Yes, Stala, he's very dreamy, but let's not forget he's only here because he was hired to kill you.") We know he's very protective, and they're both so eldest sibling-coded

[lokaneiscanon]

Mighty Thor in Thor: Love and Thunder rant

Seeing Natalie Portman returning to reprise her role as Jane Foster, nevertheless wielding Mjolnir, finally getting the treatment this character deserves, was surreal to say the least. I had just started reading Lords of Midgard, the 8th issue of Mighty Thor (2015 - 2018), and had fallen in love already. But I didn't suspect at all that Taika Waititi would pull this card in Thor: Love and Thunder, considering Jane was barely mentioned in Ragnarok. The news about my favorite actress portraying one of my favorite characters coming out of the blue - you can imagine the excitement. Alas, I quickly remembered what the fandom thought of that comic (at least on tumblr) and imagined it now growing tenfold, cuz not everyone in the MCU fandom reads comics but pretty much everyone wants to watch another Thor movie. And yes, many fans weren't ready for this step, still recovering from Sam Wilson getting the shield in Endgame. Which is completely fine. We're not obligated to like everything Marvel throws in our faces, we're allowed to criticize and express our opinion on the internet or wherever. What is not okay is mindlessly hating, and even worse - using false facts to support said opinion.

I have seen some people using the argument that it is one of Marvel's worst selling comics. Which has already been proven wrong by multiple sites, including Comichron, just Google it, as I did myself. I read multiple posts, ones saying how good Jane is doing as Thor in sales, others disproving this, so I checked for myself the numbers at the site mentioned above month by month to be sure. The comic truly had its downfalls as the story progressed but in my opinion it's normal for the 1st issue to have more sales than the 21st. If we compare it to Unworthy Thor, which started running a bit later and followed the now unworthy Odinson, the data shows the latter had more sales. But then again, while Might Thor was at its 17th issue, Unworthy Thor was at its 2nd. Also, they later crossed paths, shared comic issues, it's fair to say they go hand in hand and Jason Aaron, the author, probably doesn't want us to compare them, as they complete and compliment each other's stories. Still I decided to check the comic that made Thor unworthy in the first place - Thor: God of Thunder (2012 - 2014), which seemed to me more "comparable" to Might Thor (2015 - 2018). *I keep putting the years it was being released so as to not be confused with previous Mighty Thor issues, whole Odinson was still Thor, please bear with me* So yes, the numbers were pretty close, but from what I saw, Mighty Thor had the upper hand if we compare first issue to first issue and so on. (In defense of Odinson, we have to take into account that this data is only from the US and does not include digital sales. Also, he's been around since the 50s. We could argue Jane was a breath of fresh air that some Marvel fans were indeed ready for. As a non-American, and also a person without a hint of knowledge in economics I cannot take into account inflation and whatever else has prevented or enabled Americans to get their hands on the comics or has affected prizes through the years. Bear that in mind.) Moreover, from what I saw on Comichron, both comics had much competition - God of thunder was released along with Avengers vs the X-men, the Uncanny X-men, pretty popular at the time, and the Goddess of Thunder faced Civil War 2 and DC Universe Rebirth (yes, DC is in the game too), also dominating with tremendous sales for the longest time. Yet I stick with my original statement - both Thors are valid and shouldn't be put against one another regardless of profit. Because at the end of the day what will matter the most is the story. And boy, what a story it is.

Now, I haven't read the Thor: God of Thunder, but as I was doing research I found one very well written summary and explanation of Thor's arc and his becoming unworthy and I will post a link below, because I honestly feel I wouldn't be doing this comic a favor by describing it without having read it. Which I plan to do in the future, tbh. It's a fantastic prelude to the Mighty Thor (2015 - 2018) that I've come to love. First, I'd like to ask you all to stop hating on the comic without having read it first. It doesn't make any sense and being petty for the sake of being petty won't benefit neither you, nor anyone, really. Now, about the comic itself - the art is magnificent. It's just gorgeous. Mighty Thor isn't , thank all the gods, sexualized, she is pretty buffed and generally looks like a warrior. As it is with the other characters, I dare say. The background truly captures the essence of every world Jane finds herself on. Action scenes are just the right amount and balanced with dialogue well. On a side note, it's pretty funny to read/listen to in your head the Shakespearean English cursive in which Jane talks as Thor. The plot line branches beyond this comic, starting from Thor: God of Thunder and leading to the War of Realms. And it is elaborately built in every issue. You don't know what to expect, yet it makes sense when it happens. Which leads me to the characterizations. My God, what a treat Loki is in this. Clearly, my opinion is kinda biased, since he's my favorite character, but you never know which side he's on. What his motivations are. And it just feels so... Loki. His writing is brilliant. Almost makes me forget what the MCU did to him. Also, he gets some daddy time with Laufey (not as kinky as I make it sound). Frigga/Freyja is just as awesome as in the MCU, even more, at least in the comics she calls Odin out on his shit, who btw is I guess an asshole in every version and universe. Malekith, the main villain, is unbearably despicable, I want to tear every page he is on. He really was mishandled in the Dark World, if you want some true action with the dark elves, you are welcome to enjoy. I saved the best for the end - Jane Foster/ Might Thor. Now, if you think Dr. Foster spends her time boasting about her worthiness and how Odinson is just called Thor, but she is Mighty Thor, you are horribly wrong. She just... does her job. Because the hammer chose her. Because there's no one else to do so. That's it. If you think there's some feminism involved, yes, there sure is, but it certainly isn't the reason Jane became Thor in the first place. It was not the creators going SJW because it's trendy, as such a mindset is honestly offensive to any descent creator with any self respect, but a well thought out story arc, which, I repeat, you have to read the comic to understand. Jane is not at all whiny about the hate she gets in-universe, not only from foes like Odin and who-not, but from Shield and generally people whose asses she's saving. Her having cancer is not something they pulled to provoke sympathy and make her look like a victim - on the contrary, she is a damn hero and a victor. I don't want to give out spoilers, but her being Thor is actually a giant sacrifice that no one really appreciates (both in-universe and in the fandom). She is not Thor to prove she can be, or just to prove "women can be heroes" - she doesn't have to. She is simply needed by the realms and so she does her job, even though she is called a thief, persecuted and generally hated. All that matters is that the hammer finds her worthy - the beauty and simplicity of that fact you will find out, for the last time, if you read the comic.

I'm not making you read the comic or watch Thor: Love and Thunder. I myself don't know what to make of this film yet because there's barely any information about it. I only know it will be based on the comic so that's a reason for my hopes to be up already. On the other hand, since I didn't like Loki's characterization in Ragnarok, I'm not sure what to expect from Taika. There are valid reasons to not like the idea of Jane returning to the MCU as Thor, which you are entitled to. However, reasons such as "why does everything have to be political these days" are not. Because if I had to make a list of everything politically related in the MCU, it would take forever. Steve Rogers kills nazis is the most blatant example. Make of it what you want. But I think we're far enough into the 21st century to realize art and real life are not that separable. It's undeniable that art affects people and that is to say, people everywhere. And they all have different opinions and aren't gonna like everything media is offering to them. And I wish I could simply tell you not to watch the movie but I'm a Marvel fan too and I understand that I can't just take away Thor from you because I want Mighty Thor as well. But none of us can stop Marvel from producing it. So, to quote an image I saw recently, I don't know how to explain to you that you should care about other people. Let the rest of the fandom enjoy what they want to enjoy. Yes, ik I can play around with the tags and avoid posts that unnerve me but, for example, I'm looking up Mighty Thor fanart, which obviously isn't anti-Mighty Thor, yet I get attacked in the comics for anticipating a movie that doesn't even have a full cast yet. Ik I'm not asking for too much when I wish to get the same internet experience (not only tumblr, but also insta, YouTube, Twitter, any site) as the Thor Odison fans, for example. I'm aware I cannot stop all the toxic fans and the trolls but I hope this post has inspired those of you who simply can't envision Jane as Thor, or don't like Natalie Portman in the role, or whatever eles personal preference that doesn't involve political issues and isn't harmful to the community, not to attack every post on your dash with hate. The movie is called LOVE and Thunder, for God's sake. (on a side note, is a franchise that is too afraid to show LGBT characters for more than 1 minute so as to not lose profit from China, THAT politically correct)

Anyway, that was a veeeery long rant, sorry to whoever reads this but, like, please, I put effort into this, hoping this time around I won't be the only positive reviewer of a movie, like I was with Solo: a Star Wars story (yes, I'm still bitter about this), which was boycotted for no apparent reason but was a decent film in reality, and I'm only bringing it up because it has a similar experience to Love and Thunder for getting hate before even being released. I'm not defending a billion dollar company that flopped in box office once, I'm defending the viewer's right to media they are interested in. If you don't like the character, remember - that's your opinion, not a fact that the character sucks. Kudos.

Not very easy to navigate, I advice you to do the research month by month individually for comics you'd like to compare. Also, if you happen to find more reliable data, pls say so in the comments.

Here you have the summary and explanation of the greatness of Thor: God of Thunder, Jesus, I'll go bankrupt if I buy this one too.

Yes, I want to end the sales dispute once and for all, I'm tired of seeing it on my dash. This guy probably explains it better than I did.

@awesomejenlawrence you said you'd like to read this and I delivered