#some of this art is from a few months ago

[autisticfaun420]

Autism and Fecal Smearing

I want to get this out of the way first so I'm just gonna say it, I struggle with this awful habit which is called diaper digging and fecal smearing, this post (and blog for that matter) I don't want to shy away from talking about this stuff. So yeah if I have a bowel accident, am frustrated/overstimulated/angry/sad, and am left alone for a few minutes I tend to do this. It's not as bad as before because I have preventative measures in place, like special onesies that make it so I can't remove my diaper myself (ughhh whatever...) and crunchy scented textured slime that my mom will add even more scent to just to make it overwhelming. The average number of episodes has been greatly reduced but I had one a couple weeks ago when my onesies were in the watch so the topic is fresh on my mind.

A lot of caregivers and autism parents are mystified and baffled by this habit and wonder why we do it. I can't speak for everyone, only myself, but to me personally the scent and texture of feces is so overwhelming and strong that I get a "high" from it. I take cannabis edibles daily and my parents let me get drunk once a month so I'll say its very comparable. I get a rush from it. My life can be so monotonous sometimes that smearing crap feels like getting away with a bank robbery, I go from extremely angry to feeling before then to like a happy giddy kid without a care in the world. I zone out so hard that I end up smearing it all over my face, walls, floor, and if it gets in my mouth I'm usually too far gone to care. I do not do it because I'm mad at my parents, I do not do it because I want to get back at them for something, I simply do it because my need for sensory input is so strong and when I'm about to go into a potentially violent meltdown I reach for the sensory nuke when my normal things to stim with just won't cut it. No high is complete without the crash and there's a crash. Seeing my parents and one of my unlucky friends SOOOOOOO unreasonably mad, it's terrifying. My parents got used to it and eventually just shrugged it off but I have heard them lose their cool over it several times and have heard my name and every cuss word in the book the room over where they clean. Not nice of them but I do not blame them one bit but the feeling inside hearing that is very real for me. I guess they got too good at shrugging it off. I had an incident where I smeared in the bathroom of one of my high school friends, very chill guy, look at me and scream at the top of my lungs, and punched a hole in the wall in the living room. I didn't know the painting he had in his bathroom was that rare but I ruined it completely and that's why he reacted that way. He could of done better but I do not blame him one bit. After that though seeing a side of that friend that I never seen before scared me into wearing the stupid onesie suit every day without fuss or a fight when before I would. Not only the suit but I have the replacement slime on me at all times, if I have a BM I tend to just pull it out and play with it. This doubles up as subtly letting my parents know I need a change, which I like cause I don't have to ask verbally which can feel kinda degrading sometimes. There is one good thing that has happened with this though. My hippie parents looked at my turd stained walls and thought I had some latent artistic talent and needed self expression and bought me art and painting supplies. They were misguided, it didn't prevent any incidents but I still took the art well. My therapist at the time had some art connections and the art I made was featured in what's known as an "outsider art" gallery. I sold a few pieces for 300-600 each. It's just a little bit bitter sweet cause if you've seen the King of the Hill episode about the Probots or just know a bit about outsider art in general, you'd know the way they market it is kind of, problematic to say the least. The gallery's artist profile for me made me out to be some kind of idiot dunce and made my parents look like heroic geniuses for spotting this talent or some shit and it's embarrassing that my artwork sold most likely cause of that over the strength of the art. Like oh wow look at this stupid R word who plays with poop his cool parents are soo smart, ughhhh. However I guess that's just the art game and I'm super proud of myself I made a couple thousand dollars of MY OWN money, it meant the world to me to have it. I'm not allowed to post my artwork on here and I wish I could share it with you on MY terms and not the gallery's but my parents are worried it could come back to my identity.

I want to end this post by saying if you engage in fecal smearing you are not stupid, broken, or filthy. You are a human being desperate for relief and you took the fastest way to get it. Shout out to all my autistic homies who smear or have smeared, I see you and you are loved.

[meanbossart]

hello again 🙏 back at it again with more art of your weird guy. i did a piece a few months ago and was redrawing it for some practice, so i figured you might enjoy :) i hope you have the most wonderful new year!

OOOOOOO YES I REMEMBER IT FROM THE POSE!!! Is the bun a part of the redraw or was that there originally 🤔 either way, he looks gorgeous, I love the highlights on his face and how nice and bouncy his hair looks. Beautiful job and thank you so much for drawing him again, have a great 2025 yourself! 🍾🍾🍾

[pbelfz]

Title: Lessons in Submission Pairing: Izuku Midoriya x Reader Includes: daddy kink, teacher/student, controlling behavior, stalking? PB's Masterlist

You peered through the crack between two books on the shelf.

He smiled again as he leaned over her, offering that gentle, warm chuckle you loved. You watched him gesture to something in her textbook, and the girl followed his finger diligently as he spoke.

An underclassmen. You didn’t know her.

You pulled back, sighing through your nose as you finally placed the book you were holding in its correct spot, blocking your view of Izuku. Wrapping your fingers back around the metal of the bookcart, you pushed it from behind the stacks, out to where Izuku could see you.

His current pupil was too enthralled in her work and didn’t notice the sudden slack in Izuku’s attention; he glanced at you, intending to catch your eye. His gaze lingered on your choice of clothing today, wondering if it was allowed to wear such a short skirt on campus. You paid him no mind as you reached upward, placing another book on the higher shelf. You felt the burn of his stare as you stood on your tip-toes, purposefully pushing your lower back out slightly, almost teasingly, as your skirt rose a little.

Izuku shifted in his place, looking back down at his student’s progress. He tapped his finger on the polished library table, pressing his weight into his palm as he watched her complete the rest of her trigonometry. Tutoring was one of his many side-gigs – one that led him to you. Izuku was a teacher at U.A. full-time and a pro hero part-time, but he found he enjoyed the art of helping others in more mundane settings. You started working at the Tokyo University library just a few months ago, and you grew closer with Izuku due to having to share the same space. At first, he hadn’t been here too frequently because of his other jobs, but now it was difficult not to run into him. You read him accurately upon first meeting, seeing him as the fidgety young staff whose button-ups fit his muscles just tightly enough.

So, this is the hot tutor that all of the girls have soaked panties for, you thought when you first saw him.

Except your soaked panties were the only ones Izuku wanted. You knew that now.

Something about keeping what you two had a secret always made Izuku want to push the boundaries. He glanced at you again; if you were in the same room as him, he always kept you in sight. He’d always been that way since before you introduced yourself.

You moved. You were no longer by the bookshelves. Where are you, my angel? Izuku peered around the library. Oh, found you. You’re back by the front desk. The inside of Izuku’s cheek rolled between his back teeth; if he were alone with you, he would’ve reminded you to let him know before you left his sight. You had a bad habit of wandering, and when you two were together, Izuku often found himself keeping a hand or arm resting on you to keep you near him. That, and maybe it satisfied a need to touch you.

“Mr. Midoriya?”

Izuku’s head snapped down to see that his student had finished her trigonometry worksheet a few moments ago.

“Are you okay? You just started staring off,” she observed. Izuku shook his head, leaning back over her to check her worksheet.

“Yeah, I’m fine. Sorry,” he skimmed her math, but it wasn’t exactly registering, especially as his gaze continued to flicker up to you.

A male student approached you at the front desk, giving you a familiar smile and nod. Izuku’s chest thrummed when he saw you return the gesture with your own lively magnetism, giving the boy a smile as he took some books out of his backpack. Izuku’s jaw tightened, and his student noticed his finger tap on the table again. Her gaze crept up his arm to his face, but by then, he had already looked back down, masking his previous irritation.

“I think you should look this one over again, Sai-san,” Izuku uttered, pointing to an equation in the middle of his student’s worksheet. “It looks like you mixed up your ratios for–,” your laughter over by the front desk suddenly cut Izuku off. It wasn’t particularly loud, but it was definitely over the preferred volume level of the library. Izuku’s eyes quickly found you, leaning forward in your chair, pushing your chest up just a bit against the library table, as that same boy from earlier continued to chat you up. A grin was plastered on your face as you talked to him, and Izuku knew you were doing all of this on purpose.

This is because I’m not giving you attention, isn’t it, (Y/n)?

Izuku sighed, standing upright and no longer leaning over his student. “I’ll be right back.”

He strode over to where you and that boy were at the front desk, and you saw him coming as soon as he left the small study table in the corner. He placed his hands in the pockets of his slacks as he approached.

“Excuse me,” he spoke professionally and quietly in tone. This was a library, after all. Other students were studying and reading here. You were already watching Izuku, but the guy you were talking to – one of your classmates – turned his head to see the tutor standing behind him a few paces. You sat back in your chair, almost trying to appear like the well-behaved library assistant Izuku knew you could be.

“I’m trying to teach one of my students over there, and you guys are just being a little loud,” Izuku flexed his authority, the same way he flexed the forgiving tug on the corners of his lips. Your classmate turned away, looking to grab the books he was checking out.

“I was just leaving, sir,” your classmate says before bowing and, true to his word, taking his leave. He must hate confrontation.

Unfortunately, that left you and Izuku together. You shifted in your seat as you glanced back up at him; his small grin fell into a frown, something you didn’t see often when you two were in the school buildings.

You anticipated a further scolding or at least a disapproving sigh. You didn’t expect him to simply turn around and head back to where his student sat in the corner of the library, hands in his pockets.

Somehow, that upset you more.

Izuku waited in his car about two blocks down from the campus.

Classes ended, and the extra study sessions were over about twenty minutes ago. He scrolled mindlessly through his phone, glancing up occasionally each time someone passed on the sidewalk. You were taking longer than normal today…

Gentle taps on his passenger side window broke him from his thoughts.

You smiled at him, waving and gesturing to the locked door. Izuku wordlessly unlocked the car for you.

You plopped down into the seat beside him, and with you came all of your temptations. You must’ve dabbed your perfume on rather generously this morning because Izuku could easily identify it as the Chanel Chance Eau Tendre you keep on the top of your dresser.

You place your backpack between your feet on the floor. Izuku doesn’t give much of a greeting as he starts his car, but you lean over, giving him a sweet kiss on the cheek. He doesn’t look over at you, only giving a small smile.

You’re cheeky. Eyeing him, you place a hand on his inner thigh, close to his groin; you always loved how dense with muscle he was. You hold back a giggle, biting your lower lip, as Izuku keeps his gaze forward on the road. He knew you wanted attention. His brow became taut as he brought a hand to his chin, letting the other one rest on the steering wheel, and that was your only hint that, perhaps, you should give him space.

“Izu,” you hummed, pulling your hand back from him. Izuku didn’t answer, but it was only because he was trying to decide how to best approach this.

“Daddy,” you mewled, turning more towards him. That got him to glance at you before looking back at the road. As he came to a stoplight, he ran a hand through his forest curls and down the back of his neck.

“Your new friend seemed to like your outfit today,” he grumbled, turning his head away from you. You blinked.

“What?”

Izuku turned a corner as the light turned green.

“At the library.”

“That’s just Kujou. We take Logic together.”

Izuku’s lip tightened. “When’d you get that skirt? I didn’t buy that for you,” he redirected the topic slightly. His tone was no louder than a mumble as he dragged on, his face contorting into a scowl as he kept his eyes on the road.

He heard the pout in your voice without even looking at you. “You don’t like it? I went shopping this weekend. I thought–,” Izuku cut you off.

“We’ve talked about wearing things like this outside, (Y/n).” He was stern, and you often struggled with reading between the lines of your relationship: was he actually upset about this? So, you did what you do best around him. You froze. You shut your mouth. Getting a little huffy, you settled further into the passenger seat, your arms crossing in front of you as you gaze out of the window.

Izuku shot you a glance out of the corner of his eye before shaking his head.

You looked down at your outfit. It’s not even that short, you wanted to argue, but you knew it would’ve been in vain. The hem of the cotton came up to your mid-thigh, and if you tried to tell him you honestly just wanted to tease him while he worked, it would somehow backfire on you. It has in the past.

Izuku unlocked his apartment, stepping back to allow you inside first before closing the door behind him.

You dropped your backpack on the floor and kicked off your shoes before pivoting, meeting Izuku’s eye, while Izuku neatly hung his messenger bag on the coat rack by the door. You were used to the routine. He vaguely gestured to your clothing.

“Strip.”

You did as you were told, keeping your eyes on him, gauging his reaction. Izuku looked unimpressed as he followed your hands as they first pulled your crop top over your head, exposing your chest and tummy. Izuku’s own hands found themselves inside of his pockets – perhaps as a self-handicap – as yours pushed your skirt down your hips. You shimmied, and the skirt fell down your thighs to your feet, soon followed by your panties. You reached behind your back to unclip your bra, letting it fall to the floor with your other articles of clothing, before you stood completely bare in front of your boyfriend.

Izuku approached, his gaze zeroed in on your chest, foremost. You stood proud and tall, even though he towered over you, letting him inspect you. You felt his eyes drink you in as he looked you over, searching for any imperfections. He circled you slowly, the tips of his fingers coming to gently stroke your side. He was around the back of you now. His light touch traveled to your neck, brushing your hair to the side, admiring the few hickeys he left the last time you were here. You closed your eyes, tilting your head to show him better, like a prized purebred. He always talked about how proud he was to have his very own virgin, after all. How lucky he was to have scooped you up – such a pretty, little, dainty thing. He cupped your neck, offering a small, loving caress as a reward for your compliance as he slowly moved to the other side of you.

He did this each time you came over. You knew to get naked as soon as you entered his apartment now. He always told you he just wanted to take time to admire you, but sometimes, like today, he didn’t seem happy about doing it. You often questioned what his true intention was.

Circling back to stand in front of you with a hand stroking his chin, Izuku finally pulled his eyes away from your nudity. He sent a nod towards the back of his apartment.

“Bedroom. Leave your phone on the table.”

You sat naked on the floor with your feet underneath you, just like he trained you, waiting for him to enter. You always found your nails digging into your thighs while you waited for him, wondering if today would be the day you two would go all the way; he normally pulls back after foreplay, insisting intercourse should be something memorable for you, considering it would be your first time. You didn’t know how tonight would go, considering he still seemed to be in a bad mood.

He entered the room a few minutes later, tie removed, and you straightened your posture for him, watching him from the corner of your eye. He wasn’t looking at you, though. He was scowling down at your phone, scrolling through your texts, contacts, pictures, anything he could find.

He did this from time to time. You let him. It was within the boundaries of your relationship.

He stood right in front of you as he clicked on one of your contacts. “Arata? That’s a name I haven’t seen before.”

You piped up immediately. “That was the boy at the library. Sir.”

Izuku’s frown deepened. “I’m deleting it.”

“Yes, Sir,” you nodded, keeping your head down. It was against the rules to make eye contact unless told.

Izuku set your phone down on the bed behind you two before finally taking you in. How perfectly docile you were, propping yourself up on the wooden floor for him. He gripped your chin, tilting your head upwards to look at him.

“All contacts have to go through me first. You know that, baby.”

Your eyebrows screwed upward as you tried to defend yourself, tried to tell him you two just had to work on a project together, but Izuku drew his free hand back and brought it down in a quick, sharp slap across your cheek, sending your neck in the other direction.

Your face stung with red hot pain as you winced, keeping your eyes closed. Still, you persevered, allowing him to yank your head back to face him.

“Tell me what you did, sweetie,” his tone carried a sweet remedy underneath his usual timbre, but you knew better. His thumb gave your aching cheek a light stroke. You blinked up at him.

“I,” you took a breath, steadying yourself as you tried to remain calm. This wasn’t the first time he struck you like this, but each time, you were always on the verge of pulling your safe word. “I got his number without your permission,” you met his eye, giving him a pout to lessen the punishment even the slightest amount.

Slap.

This time, there was no coddling. He let your head hang there for a minute, and it took everything in you not to cry in front of him. You knew if you took this, he would reward you. Your ears rang, and you felt the skin of your cheek swell this time. Still, you eventually straightened in front of him, lowering your head to appease him.

“Thank you, Daddy.”

Izuku was your first exposure to a relationship like this, and while he respected your desire to take things slow, he couldn’t help but push. He had needs, too, you know? Plus, he was a teacher of sorts, and teaching you about the world of pleasure made him feel that much more control over you.

“Spread your legs wider, baby,” he guided, his head nestling between your thighs. You always became timid with his face so close to your core like this, even with the sunset dimming the light in his bedroom. He tied your arms behind your back in an armbinder knot with the shibari rope you two use. You ached, but the blankets beneath you provided some sort of comfort that Izuku didn’t give you.

Alas, you did as he told, and opened your legs more, welcoming the pecks he gave down your inner thigh which eventually reached the lips of your cunt. You shuddered, your back arching.

“Already dripping, I see…,” Izuku muttered. He liked to talk to himself, and you only answered with a whimper as one of his thick, scarred fingers swiped up your cunt, collecting some of your slick. Izuku sucked it into his mouth with a satisfied moan. He leaned up, giving you a deep kiss so you could taste yourself.

“You like when I’m a little rough with you, don’t you?”

You nod anxiously, wriggling beneath him. The mattress dipped as he moved back down between your legs, his lips fully enveloping your pussy. You gasped, your legs tightening around his shoulders.

Izuku liked to take his time with you. He could be mean, but fuck, did he worship you. His tongue lapped at your lower lips, dipping inside from time to time and sucking at your clit. He pulled back only to add his fingers, slowly finger-fucking you as he watched his work with hungry eyes. You wanted so badly to grab his head and shove it back down into your needy cunt, but the rope only dug into your skin, preventing you from moving. So, your hips made up for your lack of control and gyrated against Izuku’s fingers, circling them in time with the curl of his digits. Izuku licked his lower lip, coming back down to flick his tongue against your clit as he sped up his pace.

“Cum on my face, baby. Now,” it was a command.

You let out a throaty moan as you came, shuddering and pulling Izuku closer into you with your legs. He sucked on your clit, relishing in how you gushed on his fingers, down his wrist, and all over his mouth. Once he felt your thighs loosen around his head, he sat up, removing his briefs fully, as they’d been the only things left restricting him.

He lifted both of your legs to rest on one of his shoulders, and your stomach fluttered. You two have grinded before, and as you come down from your high, you felt yourself almost flinch at how the head of cock brushes against your clit. You almost wanted to push him away from being too sensitive, but yet again, the rope prevents you.

“Izu–,” you started to say, but the man in front of you – the man with your legs hoisted on his shoulder – glances up at you, sending you a scowl you weren’t prepared for.

“Daddy,” you quickly corrected yourself, wriggling your hips against him, feeling his cock catch on your cunt before pushing up between your thighs. Izuku bit his lip, his gaze flickering between your pussy and your face.

“Yes, babygirl?”

You didn’t want to break your role, but you sent him a knowing look, one that asked him, ‘Are we doing this?’

Izuku didn’t offer a complete answer, only bending forward and giving you a slow kiss on the lips, followed by another peck. “You know the safe word.”

Your stomach tightened, even as Izuku glided his cock up and down your slit. You practiced breathing. Deep inhale, deep exhale. Izuku watched his cock slowly enter you, your pussy lips stretching so beautifully around his thick cock. He felt your body tense, and that was when he glanced up at your face. You strained, eyes closed as you tried to make room for him.

“You’re doing so good, my good little girl,” Izuku praised as you slowly, very slowly took him in inch by inch. “Oh my god, you’re so fucking tight,” he groaned. “So fucking warm.”

You whimpered, squeezing your eyes shut as Izuku just couldn’t keep his mouth from overflowing with praise.

“Fuck, look at you swallowing me up,” he shifted, leaning over you and pressing your legs back, exposing both of your sexes. “Look,” he demanded.

You opened your eyes, tears quickly coming to the surface as you looked down between you two. His cock was only about halfway inside of you; he didn’t know how your tiny little cunt could take him. He pressed your thighs back against your chest as far as he could; he wanted to watch your pussy as he fucked you for the first time.

Once he was entirely seated inside of you, his jaw tightened, and he relished in your warmth. You breathed through your mouth, throwing your head back and feeling so, so fucking full. Izuku tested the waters, pulling his hips back slowly, and you whined.

“It’s Daddy’s turn now, okay?” Izuku reassured you, coming down to kiss away the stray tears that fell down your cheeks. You nodded, your eyes clamping shut as you felt his cock slowly stroking your inner walls.

“Fuuuuck,” Izuku dragged, leaning back and watching as his cock disappeared inside of your cunt with each thrust. He held back for you at first, but it was getting harder and harder with each buck of his hips.

His pace increased, and eventually, the pained expression on your face loosened to one of pleasure, and Izuku knew he had you. He felt his balls tighten as the sloshing sounds of your pussy echoed throughout the room.

“Such a sloppy little cunt,” you heard him grunt from above you. His endless pounding had your eyes rolling closed.

“Just,” his thrusting interrupted your speech, “Just for you, daddy.”

Izuku’s grip on your thighs tightened as his hips slammed into you at an unforgiving pace, leaving you almost screaming his name.

You felt his thick cock twitch as his pace suddenly slowed, his hips only rocking steadily as he shuddered. He let out a deep groan, and you gasped as you felt warm spurts of cum hit your cervix for the first time. Izuku pressed his legs into your chest, trying to catch his breath as a light sheen of sweat covered both of your bodies. He gazed down at his cock still inside of you, letting himself finish releasing inside of you. You whimpered as he slowly pulled himself out of you, and as his cock left you, his cum dripped out and down your cheeks, making him groan.

You watched the sight with him, wriggling your hips as best you could.

“Daddy, you made a mess…,” you managed to whine, still breathless.

Izuku couldn’t tear his gaze away from your beautiful, dripping core, covered in a mixture of your juices, as he slowly knelt between you two, releasing your thighs. You let your legs rest on the bed, and Izuku pulled one over his shoulder as he gave a kiss to your clit. His tongue swiped up your messy cunt.

“Shhh, Daddy will clean you up, babygirl.”

[minzis]

Ghost Snippets pt II

Art credits: Le Baiser Nacre (The Mother Of Pearl Kiss) by Yves Pires

ꨄ︎༻Summary: After having shot a man in self-defense, as a medic you struggle to come to terms with having taken a life. Ghost tries to offer some comfort.

ꨄ︎༻Tags: mentions of blood and death.

ꨄ︎༻Authors note: ngl forgot this was in my drafts lowkey thought I posted this months ago my fault y’all but if you’ve ever watched “The Punisher” series you’ll see exactly where I got my inspo from anyways love yall and happy new year😘

•┈୨♡୧┈•

Your hands pressed more guaze into the wound but the blood it just kept pouring out. You let out another choked sob, your hands leaving crimson red smudges on the man’s clothes along with your own. You knew you had fired your gun in self defense but you couldn’t help the riddling thoughts of having killed him. You knew you had no choice, it was you or him and yet you were still trying to save him.

You kept apologizing even though there had been no choice. The man’s eyes met with yours and you couldn’t really tell if he was actually looking at all. You shook your head insisting he would be okay. Your hand gun was long tossed aside, you couldn’t even bear to look at the thing.

There wasn’t going to be enough gauze to pack the wound, he wouldn’t even make the trek back to a reasonable enough place to be properly treated. He coughed harshly blood spilling out the corners of his mouth. You muttered another apology tearing at his clothes to get a better look at his wound. The bullet hit in his lower abdomen, it definitely hit something vital. You were trying to thinking straight but considering the amount of blood loss, and the lack of supplies. It was obviously he wasn’t going to make it.

Your movements slowed at the realization, it seemed he had already come to terms with that fact by the distant glow in his eyes. You were ready to cry when the crunch of sticks and leaves caught your attention. It was almost on instinct how quickly you rushed for your gun, by the time you flipped over the figure was already in front of you. You knew his familiar outline anywhere.

“Ghost?” You muttered in relief of no longer having to be the biggest person in the room. You dropped the gun as it thudded onto the ground. The sinking feelingly it left behind was deep. His eyes took in the scene in-front of him, he reached for you but you ignored him going back to the man.

“Come on help me,” you ushered him a spark of hope that maybe with his help you could in fact save the life you were slowly taking. Killing was different when it was your own hands, you were always on the field with them. Close enough to witness the death and destruction that war was but never close enough to use your own gun.

You were trained just enough to use a few guns, most of your brain was over filled with medical knowledge. To think you’d have to fire one of the bullets that had collected dust in their chamber. Ghost always insisted on training you more just to be safe, sometimes he’d bother you enough to where you’d allow just an hour of training before scurrying off back to saving parts of people the world tired so hard to break.

“Kid there’s nothing you can do, you know that,” he meant to speak more gently but nothing ever came out his mouth in a nice tone. You felt angry with him how easily he could brush off a life, this life. So you ignored him again reaching for more gauze, there was hardly any left you couldn’t remember when you used most of it. He tried to reach for you again but you pushed his hands away.

“But he someone’s baby, he somebody’s person,” you felt sick, your stomach churned uncomfortable. Your spilled medical supplies laid sprawled out by the same medic bag you always carried. The words ‘Medic’ engraved on the bag seemed to feel like an awfully cruel joke now.

“Hey hey hey look at me,” he spoke softly his hand tugged you upwards moving you away from the man. His hands rested on your arms shaking you slightly. You wanted to yell and scream tell him of how wrong it was.

“I killed him, fuck I killed him,” you rubbed your hands off on your pants over and over but the blood still sticked. It felt horrible, how could a person have that much blood?

“No you just shot him,” his gun suddenly fired off making you jump. “See I killed him,” you glanced down at the man’s now unmoving body. A bullet hole edged through the middle of his forehead. The blood poured around him, not a twitch was left in his fingers as he laid eerily still.

“I killed him, you hear me? Not you. His blood is on my hands not yours,” he stared at you burying the words in your head before you could think any different. His decision was simple and easy. He would always become the monster, be the worst person if it meant you never having to. Never having to deal with the aftermath of killing another person. He would forever keep his hands dripping in blood if it meant yours staying clean.

He knew better than anyone how much you didn’t deserve to live with that. Not now and not ever because you were taught to treat wounds, to restart a un-beating heart. He would rather it be him if it meant keeping the spark in your eyes that you would inevitably loose. Everyone does when they experience war first hand, but yours lasted longer than others. The team had almost become reliant on the breath of fresh air you would bring. He refused to lose that version of you so he’ll always decide without hesitation to be the evil so you can stay being the good.

[the-hasegawa-fan]

I am genuinely on the brink of tears what the actual fuck. I'm gonna rant abt this and go insane bc i cant do this shit

SPOILERS FOR TETRO CH3 BDA

i genuinely dont even care that it wasn't ken what the actual FUCK. i dont think i've been this distraught since smth rlly fucking personal a few months ago happened. and its over kamimura. holy fucking shit, whoever killed him i will NEVER FUCKING FORGIVE THEM. I DINT CARE IF THEY HAD A GOOD MOTIVE- IDGAF IF KAMIMURA TOLD THEM TO KILL EM, OR IF KAMI CAME IN GUNS FUCKING BLAZING AND TRIED TO KILL THEM.

Like- some really shitty stuff had happened and made me realize "Damn, Kamimura's really fucking relatable" and the thought of that calmed me down. I look at fucking tetro uploads after the shitstorm that was my last class, see MULTIPLE PINGS FOR ME, AND THEN KEN SCREAMING.

He was right there, he was just at breakfast, he was genuinely RIGHT THERE. TALKING, HAVING FUN. HE WANTED TO GO VISIT HIS AUNT, HE WANTED TO SEE HER. HE FINALLY HAD SOMETHING HE WANTED TO DO. Out of everyone in tetro I genuinely believe he should've had the CHANCE to escape and one day learn to love life. Shit maybe I am Ken the way I'm having a fucking mental crisis over Kazutoshi. Istg no one send me any fucking "AHAHHA NO HEAD" bc this shit has me actually shaking and im in fucking school.

Sooo I'm taking a break from tetrocord bc the jokes r already making me so fucking uncomfortable👍

Please, for my mental's sake, do not reply to my art or posts with "There's kamimura's head!!" or some shit like that, please and thank you.

[ljesak]

art summary for 2024! I'm incredibly happy with my output this year, it was quite difficult to choose representatives for each month as I love a lot of stuff I made (basically everything?). I feel like I've grown visibly comfortable and confident in my painting technique which is also probably because I've finally gotten a zero-delay monitor a few months ago which made drawing feel much smoother and removed the issue of judging contrast I used to have with my old one. I just feel "in complete control" of my strokes now, stuff looks less "struggled" even though I still enjoy my art from previous years. I have little to no issue replicating and simplifying the shapes I see when I do studies or try to catch the "essence" of what I'm drawing. My two main characters have also been an endless source of inspiration including some incredible art I've experienced this (last) year (Disco Elysium!!!)

I feel like what I want to see is in line with what I'm able to do which makes me want to make so many things and I just don't have enough time which is very frustrating. Still, I'm excited to work on the many projects still waiting for their turn (and new ones!)

My main goal is to try more complex interiors/backgrounds, overall just go "wider" with what I'm able to do as I feel like my focus (expression, color, light, atmosphere, energy, versatility) is something I'm decent enough at. Some art still ends up more "successful" in what it tried to do than other but that will always be the case I think, I stopped worrying about it

[onecentpie]

2025 Project Updates!

Heyyy people! It's been a busy few months and a while since I've given any public update on what I've been working on, so here's that now woohoo.

ODDBALL ADVENTURES

FINAL EPISODE: EVICTED

We're still working on storyboards, but I have a little jump on animation. We posted a preview of it on the channel back in November. We also wanna get started on a special side project for it too, and that'll be a surprise teehee. Here's a few more board previews oooh.

SUBWAY HOTDOGS

Also shared a preview for this back in November. We've had this audio laying around for a while and we finally got to it boarded by the amazing Anselmo and staticbrain_tv. This will be a slightly longer short and have limited animation like the Christmas Spirits video last year.

You can find it's own Tumblr blog here with comics and more updates galore yay.

WORK IN PROGRESS

PILOT

So what's going on with WIPToon? Last year I got the first quarter of it all animated! 2 and a half minutes of animation are done. Before I got back to boards, I wanted to do re-write of the second half. I think it flows much better now thanks to the help of @commanderrcat.

Everything is thumbnailed and I'm working back on storyboards in-between my other freelance work. Here's some previews!

SNOW DAY SHORT

A few months ago I had a cute little idea for a WIPToon Snow Day short. A few weeks ago, @commanderrcat, @fishiecomics and I finally got around to writing it. Without those two it'd probably stay just in my head haha. It still needs a board artist but hoping I can work on that on and off in-between the pilot.

Here's it's own dedicated Tumblr blog too!

MORE STUFF

I've been working on a music video on and off for about a year or so- actively since about November (A lot of that time was just finding a visual style I liked for it). I'm like 60% animated with it and hoping to finish it soon :D

I've been busy on a lot of projects last year. I was a cleanup artist for The Boys: Paranormal Paranoia, I've been doing a lot of animation for TheAmaazing, and I was even the lead animator for Eddsworld's latest episode, Pinheads. Aside from one post I didn't talk about it much because I took my break right after, but it was great to lead the team as a proper animation director and have an even more direct hand in designs and visual style. Maybe I'll post a few concept arts and layout drawings in a future post, who knows.

Been a busy few months working on stuff behind the curtain. I'm excited to share all these new things coming. Have a happy new year everyone!! xoxo -PB

[diamxndsdroog]

regretevator art dump part 2

[vynnyal]

I've been having a delightful time stumbling over my emojis being used in random servers, so here's more

[humans-are-tasty]

[astearisms]

Seeing the sky islands for the first time

[toffeebrews]

So, exactly a week from today, I will be entering college!!

In other words, I may become less active. Knowing myself, though, I will still try to drop art and stuff, but my motivation will definitely slow down LMFAO.

[cozylittleartblog]

chat imma be honest that project diva PC release has had lasting consequences ,

[starrysharks]

remember that i'm ALIVE but minty isn't unfortunately

[caffichai]

I've got a BlueSky page! I forgot to post it anywhere! Tumblr is a stickler for only allowing "advertiser friendly posts" (I'm not even gonna get into that, you've probably already heard), so I'm gonna be putting some of my more advertiser unfriendly content on BlueSky, along with the rest of the stuff on this blog!

[tereferka]

Worry is like a rocking chair, it keeps you occupied, but it gets you nowhere

I am very happy to present to you all my fanart I made for @vashwoodbigbang event! Made in collaboration with @snowpoet123 - author of the absolutely amazing bittersweet fanfiction that you will be able to read on her AO3 account! And here is a direct link to her work❤

Thank you @snowpoet123 for everything, it was fun to illustrate your work 🧡