#some drs and places just refuse to prescribe benzos 🤷🏻♂️
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taking an edible for me is “this is a bad idea. this is a bad idea. thisisabadideathisisabadideathisisabadidea. oh hey this isn’t so bad. this is nice. nice. nice. nice. aaaaaaaand I’m sleepy.”
#beforehand I look at them like I’m about to poison myself#’these are going to ruin my night and make me feel so anxious and sick’#but I still make myself take half of one bc I’m anxious now and I know deep down it’ll chill me out in an hour or so#drugs are bad mmkay#anyway I’m gonna chop a gummy in half and play Enter The Gungeon & listen to podcasts until it kicks in#I’m just so anxious all the time. breathing makes me anxious. thinking about falling asleep makes me anxious. being alone makes me anxious.#I have an appointment with a new psychiatrist tomorrow to talk about meds so fingers crossed#I KNOW I won’t get any immediate relief meds from them. well… I’m pretty sure I know I won’t#some drs and places just refuse to prescribe benzos 🤷🏻♂️#I get it I guess. sorta. I mean I have a long history of anxiety and ER trips for it and whatnot but nah.#naaaaah. someone might abuse a Xanax so I gotta get prescribed super Benadryl and an SSRI that I have to HOPE helps me in a couple of weeks#we’ll see what they say tomorrow. no sense in being negative before the appointments even started#hey… I like you and I appreciate you#goodbye forever#you can ignore this#text
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