#sobbing-space-trash
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richter-raccoon · 2 years ago
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blessed be the Powers That Be inside my dash
cuz same 💀
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pucksandpower · 8 months ago
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War Is Over
Lewis Hamilton x Rosberg!Reader
Summary: Lewis parks his car … right into his best friend-turned-nemesis’ little sister (and somehow reunites Brocedes in the process)
Warnings: descriptions of serious injury
Note: the fact that he not only won a race again but it was his home race … this calls for a Lewis Hamilton fic 🥹
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The Monaco sun glints off sleek sports cars lining the streets as Lewis navigates his Mercedes through the winding roads. He’s running late for dinner with some sponsors and the traffic is only making things worse.
Lewis mutters under his breath, “Come on, come on. Just need to park this thing ...”
He spots an open space in front of the restaurant and starts to maneuver in, glancing at his watch. The ticking seconds only increase his frustration.
“Bloody hell, why is parking always such a nightmare here?”
Lewis throws the car into reverse, not bothering to look behind him. He’s done this a thousand times before. What could possibly go wrong?
The sickening thud comes a split second before he slams on the brakes. His heart leaps into his throat as he whips around, praying he just hit a trash bin or something.
But the crumpled form on the ground is undeniably human.
“Oh God, oh God, no ...” Lewis fumbles with his seatbelt, hands shaking as he bursts out of the car. “Please be okay, please be okay ...”
He drops to his knees beside the prone figure, a young woman with long hair obscuring her face. Blood is already pooling beneath her head.
“Miss? Can you hear me?” Lewis gently brushes the hair back, and his world stops.
It’s you. Nico’s little sister. The girl he’s known since she was in pigtails, cheering from the sidelines at their early karting races.
Lewis’ jaw drops open as the full horror of what he’s done sinks in. “Y/N? Oh God, Y/N, please wake up!”
He cradles your head, heedless of the blood staining his designer shirt. Your eyes remain closed, skin alarmingly pale.
“Someone call an ambulance!” Lewis shouts, his voice cracking with panic. “Please, somebody help!”
A crowd starts to gather, murmurs of shock and recognition rippling through them. Lewis barely notices, focused solely on your still form.
“Y/N, come on, open your eyes. Please, you have to be okay,” he pleads, gently patting your cheek. “I’m so sorry, I didn’t see you, I swear I didn’t mean to ...”
Your eyelids flutter, a soft groan escaping your lips. Lewis nearly sobs with relief.
“That’s it, that’s it. Can you hear me? It’s Lewis. You’re going to be alright.”
Your eyes open, unfocused and confused. “Lewis? What ... what happened?”
“Don’t try to move, okay? There was an accident. Help is on the way.”
You try to sit up, wincing in pain. “My head ...”
“Shh, just stay still. I’ve got you.” Lewis supports your shoulders, keeping you from moving too much.
“Did ... did you hit me with your car?” Your voice is small, disbelieving.
Lewis swallows hard. “I’m so, so sorry. I didn’t see you, I swear. God, Y/N, I would never ...”
You manage a weak smile. “Always knew you’d be the death of me, Hamilton.”
Despite everything, Lewis can’t help but chuckle. “Don’t joke about that. You scared me half to death.”
“Sorry to ruin your evening,” you mumble, eyes starting to drift closed again.
“Hey, hey, stay with me.” Lewis gently taps your cheek. “Keep those eyes open, okay? Talk to me.”
You force your eyes open. “About what?”
“Anything. Tell me ... tell me what you’re doing in Monaco. Are you visiting Nico?”
You shake your head slightly, then wince. “No, I ... I moved here. Got a job at the yacht club.”
“Really? That’s great. When did that happen?”
“Few months ago. Needed ... needed a change of scenery.”
Lewis nods, desperately trying to keep you engaged. “I get that. Monaco’s beautiful. Although the parking situation leaves something to be desired,” he adds wryly.
You manage a weak laugh, then grimace. “Ow. Don’t make me laugh.”
“Sorry, sorry.” Lewis glances around anxiously. “Where’s that damn ambulance?”
As if on cue, sirens wail in the distance. Lewis breathes a sigh of relief.
“Help’s coming, Y/N. Just hang on a little longer, okay?”
You nod slightly, eyes becoming unfocused again. “Lewis?”
“Yeah?”
“Don’t tell Nico.”
Lewis’ heart clenches. “Y/N ...”
“Please. He’ll kill you. And then me. For being stupid enough to walk behind a car without looking.”
“This isn’t your fault,” Lewis insists. “I should have checked my mirrors. I was distracted, rushing ...”
You shake your head stubbornly. “Promise me. Don’t tell him.”
Lewis hesitates. “Y/N, I can’t just ...”
“Promise,” you repeat, gripping his arm with surprising strength.
Lewis sighs. “Okay, okay. I promise. But he’s going to find out eventually.”
“Let me handle it. When I’m not ... you know. Bleeding on the pavement.”
The ambulance pulls up, paramedics jumping out. Lewis reluctantly moves aside to let them work, hovering anxiously.
“Sir, can you tell us what happened?” One of the paramedics asks as they begin assessing your injuries.
Lewis runs a hand through his hair. “I ... I hit her with my car. I was backing up and didn’t see her. It was an accident, I swear.”
The paramedic nods, focused on taking your vitals. “Miss, can you tell me your name?”
“Y/N Rosberg,” you mumble.
The paramedic’s eyes widen slightly in recognition, but he remains professional. “Alright, Y/N. We’re going to get you to the hospital. Just try to stay still for me.”
As they prepare to move you onto a stretcher, Lewis steps forward. “Can I ride with her?”
The paramedic hesitates. “Are you family?”
“No, but I’m ... I’m responsible for this. Please, I need to make sure she’s okay.”
You reach out weakly, grasping Lewis’ hand. “Let him come. He’s ... he’s family.”
The paramedic nods. “Alright, but stay out of the way.”
As they load you into the ambulance, Lewis climbs in beside you, still holding your hand. The doors slam shut and the sirens wail as they speed towards the hospital.
“You didn’t have to do that,” Lewis says softly.
You give his hand a weak squeeze. “Couldn’t let you ... sulk all night. You’d probably ... crash into a street lamp next.”
Lewis chuckles despite himself. “There’s that Rosberg wit. You sound just like your brother sometimes.”
You grimace. “Don’t insult me when I’m down, Hamilton.”
The banter feels surreal given the circumstances, but Lewis is grateful for it. It keeps the crushing guilt at bay, if only for a moment.
“Y/N, I ...” he starts, then falters. “I don’t even know how to begin to apologize.”
You shake your head slightly. “Later. When everything ... stops spinning.”
Lewis nods, throat tight. He watches the paramedics work, feeling utterly helpless.
“Tell me something,” you murmur after a moment.
“What?”
“Anything. Distract me.”
Lewis thinks for a moment. “Did I ever tell you about the time Nico and I got lost in Ibiza?”
You manage a small smile. “No. Spill.”
As Lewis launches into the story, embellishing for comedic effect, he can’t help but marvel at your resilience. Here you are, cracking jokes and asking for stories while bleeding from a head wound he caused.
The guilt threatens to overwhelm him again, but he pushes it aside. Right now, keeping you conscious and calm is what matters. There will be time for apologies and recriminations later.
As the ambulance weaves through Monaco’s narrow streets, Lewis silently vows to make this right, whatever it takes. He may have destroyed his friendship with Nico, but he won’t let you pay the price for their rivalry.
The hospital looms ahead, and Lewis squeezes your hand. “We’re almost there, Y/N. You’re going to be okay. I promise.”
You meet his eyes, a flicker of something — trust? forgiveness? — passing between you. “I know,” you whisper. “I’ve got my guardian angel, after all. Even if he is a bit rubbish at parking.”
Lewis laughs, the sound catching in his throat. As they wheel you into the emergency room, he realizes with startling clarity that nothing will ever be the same after tonight.
But looking at your brave smile as the doctors surround you, he thinks that maybe, just maybe, that might not be such a bad thing.
***
The steady beep of the heart monitor fills the hushed hospital room. Lewis sits hunched in an uncomfortable chair beside your bed, his eyes never leaving your sleeping form. The stark white bandage wrapped around your head is a constant reminder of his guilt.
A nurse pops her head in. “Mr. Hamilton? There’s someone here to see-”
She’s cut off as Nico barges past her, his face a mask of fury. “You son of a bitch.“
Nico’s fist is already swinging towards Lewis’ face when a doctor in a white coat steps between them. “Gentlemen! This is a hospital, not a boxing ring!”
Nico’s momentum carries him forward, nearly stumbling into the doctor. He catches himself, chest heaving as he glares daggers at Lewis.
“What the hell are you doing here?” Nico snarls.
Lewis stands, hands raised placatingly. “Nico, I can explain-”
“Explain? Explain how you nearly killed my sister?” Nico’s voice rises, causing you to stir in the bed.
The doctor clears his throat. “Mr. Rosberg, I presume? I’m Dr. Moreau. Perhaps we should step outside to discuss your sister’s condition.”
Nico hesitates, clearly torn between getting information and pummeling Lewis. Finally, he nods curtly. “Fine. But this isn’t over, Hamilton.”
As they step into the hallway, Lewis sinks back into his chair, running a hand over his face. He glances at you, relieved to see you’ve settled back into sleep.
In the corridor, Dr. Moreau speaks in low, measured tones. “Mr. Rosberg, your sister suffered a severe concussion and a fractured skull. There was some internal bleeding, but we’ve managed to stabilize that.”
Nico’s knees go weak, and he leans against the wall for support. “Oh God ...”
“She also has three broken ribs, a fractured wrist, and various cuts and bruises,” the doctor continues. “Frankly, it’s a miracle she wasn’t more seriously injured. The impact could easily have been fatal.”
Nico slides down the wall, sitting heavily on the floor. “She ... she almost died?”
Dr. Moreau nods gravely. “It was touch and go for a while. But she’s young and strong. With time and proper care, we expect her to make a full recovery.”
Nico buries his face in his hands, shoulders shaking. After a moment, he looks up, eyes red-rimmed. “Can I see her?”
“Of course. But please, try to stay calm. She needs rest.”
Nico nods, pulling himself to his feet. He takes a deep breath before re-entering the room.
Lewis stands as Nico approaches the bed. “Nico, I-”
“Save it,” Nico snaps, but there’s less venom in his voice now. He gently takes your hand, his thumb tracing circles on your palm.
Your eyes flutter open. “Nico?” You mumble groggily.
“Hey, little sis,” Nico says softly, managing a weak smile. “How are you feeling?”
“Like I got hit by a car,” you deadpan.
Lewis winces, but Nico actually chuckles. “Well, your sense of humor is intact, at least.”
You try to sit up, grimacing in pain. Lewis and Nico both move to help, then freeze, glaring at each other.
You roll your eyes. “Oh, for heaven’s sake. Both of you, help me up. And then explain why you look ready to kill each other. Again.”
With their combined efforts, they manage to prop you up against the pillows. You look expectantly between them.
Nico breaks first. “How can you even ask that? He nearly killed you!”
“It was an accident,” you insist.
“An accident?” Nico scoffs. “He hit you with his car!”
“Which I’m pretty sure he didn’t do on purpose,” you retort. “Right, Lewis?”
Lewis nods emphatically. “God, no. Y/N, I swear, I never saw you. I was distracted, rushing ... but I would never intentionally hurt you. You have to believe that.”
Nico’s jaw clenches. “Maybe not intentionally. But your carelessness nearly cost my sister her life. How am I supposed to forgive that?”
“You don’t have to forgive me,” Lewis says quietly. “I don’t know if I’ll ever forgive myself. But Y/N is the one who was hurt. Shouldn’t it be her choice?”
You nod, wincing at the movement. “Exactly. And I choose to forgive you, Lewis. It was an accident. A stupid, awful accident, but still an accident.”
Nico shakes his head in disbelief. “Y/N, you can’t be serious. You’re lying in a hospital bed because of him!”
“And he’s been by my side ever since,” you counter. “He rode in the ambulance with me, held my hand through all the tests and scans. He’s barely left this room in hours.”
Lewis looks down, uncomfortable with the praise. “It was the least I could do.”
Nico runs a hand through his hair, frustrated. “That doesn’t change what happened.”
“No, it doesn’t,” you agree. “But it shows he cares. That he’s taking responsibility.”
“I’ll pay for all her medical expenses,” Lewis adds quickly. “And anything else she needs for her recovery. It’s the least I can do.”
Nico snorts. “You think you can just throw money at this and make it go away?”
“No!” Lewis insists. “I know nothing can undo what happened. But I want to help however I can.”
You reach out, grabbing both their hands. “Listen to me, both of you. I’m tired, I’m in pain, and I don’t have the energy for your macho posturing right now.”
They both have the grace to look ashamed.
“Nico, I love you, but you need to calm down,” you continue. “Lewis made a mistake, a big one. But he’s trying to make amends. And frankly, I need both of you right now. I can’t deal with you at each other’s throats on top of everything else.”
Nico’s expression softens. “I’m sorry, Y/N. I just ... when I got that call, saying you were in the hospital ... I’ve never been so scared in my life.”
You squeeze his hand. “I know. But I’m okay. Or I will be. And having you two fighting isn’t going to help me get better any faster.”
Lewis clears his throat. “She’s right. Nico, I know you have every right to hate me right now. But can we please call a truce? For Y/N’s sake?”
Nico hesitates, clearly torn. Finally, he nods stiffly. “Fine. A truce. But only for Y/N.”
“Thank you,” you sigh, relaxing back against the pillows. “Now, can one of you please get me some water? And maybe sneak in some real food? I’m starving and the hospital jello isn’t cutting it.”
Lewis jumps up. “I’ll go. Nico, you stay with her. I’ll be right back.”
As Lewis hurries out, Nico settles into the chair beside your bed. “You sure you’re okay, little sis?”
You manage a small smile. “I’ve been better. But I’ve also been worse.”
Nico raises an eyebrow. “When have you been worse than having a cracked skull and broken ribs?”
“Remember when I was eight and fell out of that tree in the backyard?”
Nico chuckles. “God, I thought Mama was going to have a heart attack. You were so stubborn, insisting you could climb higher than me.”
“Still can,” you tease.
“Maybe hold off on the tree climbing for a while, yeah?”
You pretend to pout. “Spoilsport.”
The banter feels good, normal. For a moment, you can almost forget you’re in a hospital bed.
Nico’s expression turns serious. “Y/N, are you really okay with forgiving Lewis so easily? You don’t have to, you know. Not for my sake or anyone else’s.”
You sigh. “I know. And believe me, I’m not thrilled about the whole getting hit by a car thing. But Nico, you should have seen his face when he realized it was me. He was devastated.”
“He should be,” Nico grumbles.
“I’m not saying there won’t be consequences,” you continue. “But I don’t believe for a second he meant to hurt me. And holding onto anger isn’t going to help me heal any faster.”
Nico studies your face for a long moment. “When did you get so wise, little sister?”
You grin. “I’ve always been the smart one in the family. You were just too busy crashing karts to notice.”
Nico laughs, then sobers. “I was so scared, Y/N. When they called and said you were in the hospital ... all I could think was that I couldn’t lose you.”
You squeeze his hand. “Hey, you’re not getting rid of me that easily. It’ll take more than Lewis Hamilton’s terrible parking skills to take out a Rosberg.”
“Don’t joke about that,” Nico says, but he’s smiling.
Lewis returns then, arms laden with bags. “I wasn’t sure what you’d want, so I got a bit of everything. Sandwiches, fruit, some pasta salad ... oh, and chocolate. Lots of chocolate.”
You beam at him. “My hero.”
Nico rolls his eyes, but there’s less hostility in it now. “Is this really the time for sweets?”
Lewis grins sheepishly. “Hey, chocolate has healing properties. I read that somewhere.”
“Sounds like solid medical advice to me,” you chime in, already reaching for a candy bar.
As Lewis unpacks the food, a tentative peace settles over the room. It’s fragile, built on shared concern for you rather than any real reconciliation between the two men. But it’s a start.
You watch them, noting how they unconsciously mirror each other’s movements as they fuss over arranging the food on your tray. For all their differences, for all the bad blood between them, there’s still an underlying connection there. Years of friendship and rivalry can’t be erased so easily.
“You know,” you say around a mouthful of sandwich, “this whole arch-enemies thing you two have going on is getting a bit old.”
They both look at you, startled.
“I mean, come on,” you continue. “You were best friends for years. You’ve known each other longer than most marriages last. Is it really worth throwing all that away over some stupid trophies?”
Nico frowns. “Y/N, it’s more complicated than that-”
“Is it, though?” You interrupt. “Because from where I’m sitting — or laying, I guess — it seems pretty simple. You both love racing. You’re both insanely competitive. And yeah, sometimes that caused friction. But at the end of the day, who else understands what you have been through better than each other?”
Lewis and Nico exchange uncomfortable glances.
“I’m not saying you have to be best buddies again,” you add. “But maybe ... I don’t know. Maybe you could try not actively hating each other? For my sake, if nothing else. I’m going to need both of you while I recover and I really don’t want to deal with World War III breaking out in my hospital room.”
There’s a long moment of silence. Finally, Lewis speaks up.
“She’s right,” he says quietly. “Nico, I know things have been ... difficult between us. And I know this situation hasn’t helped. But Y/N’s important to both of us. Can we at least try to be civil? For her?”
Nico hesitates, then nods slowly. “I suppose we can try. But Lewis, I swear, if anything like this ever happens again-”
“It won’t,” Lewis says firmly. “I promise you, Nico. I’ll do whatever it takes to make this right.”
You beam at them both. “See? Was that so hard? Now, who’s going to help me eat all this food? Doctor’s orders, you know. Got to keep my strength up.”
As they both reach for the tray, playfully battling over who gets to hand you what, you can’t help but smile. It’s not perfect, not by a long shot. But it’s a beginning.
And really, you think as you watch the two most important men in your life grudgingly share a bag of crisps, sometimes beginnings are the best part of any story.
***
f1-fanatic-2024
[Image: Lewis Hamilton and Nico Rosberg exiting a hospital, walking side by side]
OMG IS THIS REAL??? Brocedes spotted together??? What year is it???
#what is happening #f1 #lewis hamilton #nico rosberg #brocedes
---
brocedes-no1-stan
[reblogging f1-fanatic-2024’s post]
I’m sorry, but are we just going to ignore the fact that they’re leaving a HOSPITAL??? Is everyone okay???
#concerned #hope everyone’s alright #but also lowkey excited
---
vintage-f1-vibes
Okay but why does this feel like a glitch in the matrix? Haven’t seen these two willingly in the same frame since like 2016 😭
#blast from the past #what year is it #f1 #lewis hamilton #nico rosberg
---
racing-queen-93
[reblogging f1-fanatic-2024’s post]
BROCEDES RISE!!! 🙌🙌🙌
My 2014 heart is SOARING right now. Never thought I’d see the day. BRB, gonna go cry in a corner.
#i’m not crying you’re crying #brocedes #lewis hamilton #nico rosberg #f1
---
silverarrows4ever
[Image set: Multiple angles of Lewis and Nico leaving the hospital, including one where they appear to be mid-conversation]
New Brocedes content in 2024? Maybe miracles do happen 😭
But seriously, hope everything’s okay. Weird to see them at a hospital.
#concerned but hopeful #lewis hamilton #nico rosberg #f1 #brocedes
---
formula1-history-nerd
[reblogging silverarrows4ever’s post]
Okay, but can we talk about how neither of them has aged a day??? What kind of vampire magic-
#aging like fine wine #drop the skincare routine boys #f1 #lewis hamilton #nico rosberg
---
racingdaydreams
Me: I’m over Brocedes, that ship has sailed
Also me seeing these pics: 🥺👉👈
#i’m weak okay #f1 #brocedes #lewis hamilton #nico rosberg
---
fastcarsgovroomvroom
[reblogging f1-fanatic-2024’s post]
Everyone freaking out about Brocedes and I’m just wondering why they’re at a hospital??? Hope everyone’s okay!
#f1 #lewis hamilton #nico rosberg
---
f1-drama-central
BREAKING: Lewis Hamilton and Nico Rosberg spotted leaving Princess Grace Hospital together. Sources say they arrived separately but left at the same time, engaging in what appeared to be civil conversation. More updates as the story develops!
#breaking news #what’s the tea #f1 #lewis hamilton #nico rosberg
---
retro-racing-vibes
[reblogging f1-drama-central’s post]
2014 me is SCREAMING right now. 2024 me is cautiously optimistic but also kind of worried because ... hospital?
#conflicted feelings #f1 #lewis hamilton #nico rosberg #brocedes
---
formulaonefanatic
[Image: Close-up of Lewis and Nico talking, both with serious expressions]
Whatever brought them together, it looks serious. Hoping everyone’s okay. But also ... is it wrong that I’m a little excited to see them talking again?
#concerned but intrigued #brocedes #f1 #lewis hamilton #nico rosberg
***
f1-gossip-central
[Image set: Lewis, Nico, and Y/N on Lewis’ yacht. Another photo of Lewis kissing Y/N with Nico cringing in the background]
WHAT IS HAPPENING??? Lewis and Nico on the same boat??? Lewis kissing Nico’s sister??? I need answers!!!
#what timeline is this #i’m shook #f1 #lewis hamilton #nico rosberg #y/n rosberg
---
brocedes-ride-or-die
[reblogging f1-gossip-central’s post]
EXCUSE ME??? Lewis and Y/N??? When did this happen??? How did I miss this??? 😱😱😱
#new ship alert #what is happening #f1 #lewis hamilton #y/n rosberg
---
vintage-f1-drama
Okay but Nico’s face in that last pic is sending me 💀💀💀 Big protective brother energy
#siblings be like #f1 #nico rosberg #lewis hamilton #y/n rosberg
---
formulaoneobsessed
[Image: Close-up of Lewis kissing Y/N]
New F1 power couple alert? 👀 But also, how is Nico okay with this?
#f1 #lewis hamilton #y/n rosberg #nico rosberg
---
racingheartstrings
[reblogging formulaoneobsessed’s post]
I can’t decide if this is the best or worst plot twist of the 2024 season 😂
Either way, I’m here for the drama!
#pass the popcorn #f1 #lewis hamilton #y/n rosberg #nico rosberg
---
silverarrowsforever
[Image set: Lewis and Nico chatting on the yacht, looking relaxed]
Can we talk about how this is the most relaxed we’ve seen these two together in YEARS??? Whatever’s happening, it seems to be healing old wounds and I’m here for it 🙌
#f1 #lewis hamilton #nico rosberg #brocedes
---
f1-fanfiction-addict
Me: furiously rewriting all my Brocedes fics to include Y/N
The plot twist we never saw coming 😅
#f1 #lewis hamilton #nico rosberg #y/n rosberg #fanfiction problems
---
speed-queen-101
[reblogging f1-gossip-central’s post]
Y’all are focused on the Lewis and Y/N kiss but can we appreciate how GOOD everyone looks??? That Monaco sun is doing wonders 😍
#glow up #f1 #lewis hamilton #nico rosberg #y/n rosberg
---
formula1-history-buff
Imagine telling someone in 2016 that in 2024, Lewis would be dating Nico’s sister and they’d all be hanging out on Lewis’ yacht. They’d think you were crazy!
#how times change #f1 #lewis hamilton #nico rosberg #y/n rosberg
---
racingdaydreams
[Image: Nico’s cringing face as Lewis kisses Y/N]
Tag yourself, I’m Nico 😂
#third wheel vibes #f1 #nico rosberg #lewis hamilton #y/n rosberg
---
fastcarsgovroomvroom
[reblogging racingdaydreams’ post]
Petition for a reality show following this trio because I would watch the HECK out of that
#make it happen netflix #f1 #lewis hamilton #nico rosberg #y/n rosberg
---
f1-drama-queen
THEORY TIME: What if the hospital visit from last week was for Y/N??? And that’s what brought Lewis and Nico back together??? 🤔
#conspiracy theory #but makes sense #f1 #lewis hamilton #nico rosberg #y/n rosberg
---
brocedes-forever
[Image set: Lewis and Nico laughing together on the yacht]
My Brocedes heart is THRIVING right now. Yeah, the Lewis and Y/N thing is cute, but look at these two 😭❤️
#f1 #lewis hamilton #nico rosberg #brocedes #friendship goals
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sim0nril3y · 1 month ago
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Pairing: Simon 'Ghost' Riley x Civilian!Reader Scenario: After an incident in your home you made the decision to move in together. Warnings: No mask Simon (It's my personal headcanon in his regular life he probably wouldn't wear it), very soft, talk of break-in, canon-typical swearing.
It was late evening, Simon had just gotten home himself from meeting with Price and Gaz, they met up and caught up on everything they’d missed in each other’s lives. He still couldn’t bring himself to speak about you in front of them, still wanting to keep you a secret, keep you safe from any parts of his life that could put you in danger. He’d kept quiet even when Price spoke about some pretty thing he’d been seeing and when Gaz brought up the posh bird he'd met at a wedding.
He'd asked for you to call when you got home from work, his phone buzzing as he entered his home caught his attention. Smiling, answering and bringing it up to his ear as he asked. “Get home alright-” The words died in his throat as he heard the sounds of your little hiccups and sobs. “What’s happened? Where are you?” As soon as Simon had entered his home, he’d walked straight back out of it in the direction of his car. “I’m on my way…”
The story was that your flat had been broken into whilst you’d been out at work. The place had been completely ransacked, anything valuable was gone, mostly everything else was trashed and destroyed. The lock on the door was completely busted now and ultimately you just felt vulnerable in your own space, it simply didn’t feel safe anymore.
The whole journey to your block of flats Simon was cursing himself. The one night that he didn’t come pick you up from work, the one night he was busy and focusing on himself you’d fucking needed him, you’d been sacred and alone and come back to your flat to find the door kicked open and worried that whoever had gotten in there might still be in there.
He took the stairs to the flat block two or three at a time, chasing up them to get to you. Everyone in the block seemed to be stirring from the police being on the scene, all out to watch this all unfold. You’d been standing outside of your flat allowing the police to look around the small space inside, searching for anything that might have been left behind in the wake of the chaos that had happened inside. Simon approached and wrapped his strong arms around your trembling form, pulling you into his chest and kissing your forehead as he muttered. “I’m here… I’m here…”
He calmed you. He coaxed you into his arms. He silently seethed about whatever little prick had let themselves into your home, your sanctuary and made their way off with your things, your personal items. Simon would hunt them down given the chance but now wasn’t the time to be raging, all his energy needed to be focused on you. “I know, babe. I know.” He muttered quietly, pulled into his arms, warm and safe in his embrace.
Soon enough the police were done, they advised strongly to stay elsewhere for the night, with a busted door and the place already targeted it was more vulnerable than ever. Simon was collecting some of your clothes into a bag whilst you wandered aimlessly around the rest of the small home, pausing for a long moment at your art supplies, kneeling down to inspect the canvas’. It hurt to see them trampled and discarded like this, just completely destroyed by some heartless thug.
“Y’okay?” The small voice of Simon came from behind you, glancing over your shoulder in his direction. You certainly didn’t look alright, you look so vulnerable, so betrayed in your own place. “I know…” He muttered gently, moving towards you to gently kneel down beside you and look at your canvas. “You’ll make better-”
You mentioned. “I’m too tired to do this.” And he understood, you’d just come home from work to find this horrific event had happened. It wasn’t fair and you didn’t need to process these emotions right now. No, right now, he just needed to get you someplace safe where you could rest your head for a few hours and deal with everything else in the morning.
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Following that incident it didn’t take long for the two of you to come to the decision that moving in together would be for the best. Honestly, he thought he’d have a little more difficulty taking that step, but with all that had happened the idea of having you live under the same roof as him, having you around all the time, waking up together, simply knowing that you were safe filled him with this sense of relief and completion.
Everything was set into motion from then, you took to cancelling your tenancy on the flat and the process to move you into Simon’s home was put into effect. With all that was left in your flat it didn’t take much to box up all the remaining furniture and items, three or four trips back and forth from the flat to the house was all it took to move everything over. That was it settled; you were living together.
Simon was holding a box labelled ‘art supplies’ stepping past you to head upstairs. “You can just put it in the garage.” You suggested, after having most of your art destroyed the appeal to make anything new wasn’t inside of you, unsure if it was temporary or permanent you boxed your things away for now to deal with at a later time. “S’alright…” He mentioned, continuing to stomp upstairs. “I’ll put it in your art room.” He commented, now this was enough to make your brow furrow.
“What?” You then proceeded to chase upstairs behind him, following him into the spare room and coming to a stop to see Simon had kitted it out with all the supplies that had been destroyed in the break-in, even a new easel facing to look out the window into the beautiful back garden scenery. “This… is for me?”
It had been something that Simon had noticed that you’d been lacking expressing yourself creatively, usually he’d find you holed up creating something new, or working on an old piece… but since the break-in you’d been almost avoiding it. Placing down the box in his hands he replied. “Well, yeah… you don’t think it’s all for me, do ya?” He asked with a raised brow looking at you, a teasing tone to his voice which made you smile subtly. “Can’t put this stuff in the garage, anyway, got my weights down there.” He informed you with a non-committal shrug.
You watched him for a moment before rushing over and wrapping your arms around him, hugging onto him as tight as you could manage. Simon hugged your back, placing a hand on the back of your head and rubbing your back in a soothing way. “Thank you.” You mumbled into his throat. There was so much that you were thankful to him for but allowing you the space to find that creative side to yourself again was something you’d be eternally grateful to him for. “Thank you.”
“S’alright, babe.” Simon replied, kissing the top of your head and holding you securely in his arms. “You’re safe now.” He muttered, probably more to himself that even you. “You’re home.”
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Masterlist | Ask | 20-01-2025
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moody-alcoholic · 3 months ago
Text
On a Wing and a Prayer
Part 3 - The First 24 Hours
This 'short' dribble is getting out of control. Also reader is a medic now... I have a thing for medical dramas.. CW: PTSD, mental health, panic attacks, little bit of comfort.
Previous parts - masterlist - next
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You don’t want to stay in the med-bay. You want to get out of the sterile room to somewhere you feel comfortable. Which is hard to find while you’re still stuck on a base. You go to your room trying to ignore and avoid as many people as you can. 
You catch people whispering out the corner of your eyes, there’s probably not been anything this interesting happening in months. It’s not everyday special forces turn on one of their own, it’s not everyday they torture one of their own. 
You make it back to your room. It’s just the way you left it. Now it feels empty. 
There would be times when you would come back from a long day of training to find Simon laid on your bed with a cigarette between his lips, or Johnny sitting crossed legged with a book ready to talk your ear off about his day. 
That’s never going to happen again, you never want them in your space again. When you make it over to the bed you see a letter with your name on it. You recognise the handwriting it’s John’s. You don’t want to open it, your eyes go to the trash bin in the corner of your room. That's the only place it belongs. 
Your curiosity gets the better of you though. 
You sit down picking it up, your hands shaking, you’re holding your breath as you open it. You don’t even make it past the first line of the word vomit apology before you don’t want to read it any more. There is no use in them trying to reconcile with you. You fold it closed. Simon’s lighter is still there on the crate you turned into a bedside table. You pick it up, it makes you mad. 
You hate them, you hate what they put you through. You thought they loved you. You thought they would be on your side believing everything you said. Instead they hurt you, over and over for days. You found out from Kyle it had been 4 days. It felt longer. 
You bring the lighter up to the letter and set it on fire. You hold it in your hand watching as the flames disintegrate it into nothing. You drop it on the floor when it's about to reach your fingers and stamp it out. The knock at your door makes you jump. Your heart is pounding in your chest. 
“It’s me.” Kyle calls. You walk over opening it. He smiles at you but you don’t smile back. 
“He’s awake. He’s asking for you.” Kyle says. You let out a sigh of relief. He made it, thank god he made it. You follow Kyle in silence back to the med-bay. You walk past the room you slept in last night. Well slept wasn’t really the right word. Everytime you close your eyes, you're back in that room, with the snakes and the water. Two hours you think you go in total, spent the rest of the night having panic attacks until a nurse found you sobbing in a corner. 
The doctor wants you to speak to a psychiatrist. ‘Yeah? So I can be discharged? I want to work.’ That was met with sighs and a prescription for sleeping pills. Kyle stops just outside Johnny’s room. He turns to you and sighs.
“John and Simon are already here.” He says, it makes your stomach twist. You haven’t seen them since you left the room. You don’t want to see them, but you want to see Johnny. 
“It’s okay.” You lie. Kyle sighs again, you can tell by the expression on his face he’s sorry. 
“They don’t want to tell Johnny about what happened. They’re worried it will upset him. He’s only just woke up, the doctors want to give him a few days. Make sure he’s stable.”  
“Is that the doctor's decision on John’s?” You snap. You’re mad, you don’t want to lie to Johnny. Kyle doesn’t answer, instead he presses his lips together running his hand over his head. You sigh looking into the room, you can see John and Simon stood by the bed blocking your view of Johnny. 
It doesn’t matter who said it, they're right. Johnny needs rest, he needs to recover, he’s been in a coma for almost a week any stress could be dangerous. 
“I won’t say anything.” You say letting out a breath. Kyle smiles and reaches forward to grab your hand. You move it away so he can’t crossing your arms instead. You have to calm down or it’s going to be harder than it already is. 
Kyle walks in the room and you follow after. You try not to look at them but you can’t help it. Luckily Johnny pulls your attention away.
“Where have you been hiding lass? I thought you'd never leave my side!” He calls as you make it round to the other side of the bed and hug him. He groans in pain as he leans forward. You hope he can’t feel how hard your heart is beating. 
 “We were worried, for a while it looked like you weren't going to make it.” Kyle says as you break away from the hug. 
“Pff, not when I have the best medic in the world looking after me.” He says winking at you and grabbing your hand. You squeeze it tight and force a smile at him. It feels unnatural, it feels wrong, everything about this feels wrong. 
“What happened?” He asks suddenly, his eyes creasing together, his face going dark. You’re holding your breath, it feels like everyone in the room is holding their breath. He holds your hand up. You still have the hospital tag on. Shit. Panic rises in you. You don’t know what to do. You open your mouth to speak but words don’t come out.
“She hit her head.” Kyle says. You let out a sigh of relief as his hand finds the small of your back. 
“They wanted to keep me in for observation.” You follow up hoping he can’t hear the shaking in your voice. You look up at John and Simon, the colour drained from their faces. Simon clears his throat and Johnny turns to look at him. It gives you a second to squeeze your eyes shut and wish you were anywhere else. 
“You been pushing her too hard again?” Johnny asks Simon tutting. 
“Only what she can handle.” Simon says, it sounds cold in your ears. You feel sick bile rises in your stomach. You need to leave, your hand is sweaty, you pull it away from Johnny. You’re glad Kyle’s hand is on your back because without it you think you might pass out. 
“I have to go. Got this new rota that's kicking my ass.” You say trying to keep your voice level. It sounds so unnatural. You swallow trying to get the lump forming in your throat to go away but it wont. “I’ll come see you later. I promise.” You back up from the bed as Johnny looks confused. 
You can’t be here. You almost want to sprint out the room but you keep your calm walking out normally. When you leave and close the door behind you, that's when you run. 
______
You’re standing outside the washroom with a towel and a toothbrush in your hand. You want to take a shower scrub the layer of grease that's formed on your skin. You tried, you tried to take a shower in the hospital, the water brings flashbacks. Great, now you’re afraid of water. 
You have to get it together, if you can’t you’ll be sent home on leave, or worse discharged. You want to work, you enjoy work. Maybe not the people you work with but you’ve already thought about a transfer. You doubt John will have any issues with that, and if he does well there are always people above him. 
“Hey.” Kyle calls making you jump. He frowns coming towards you. “Didn’t see you at dinner, is everything okay?” It looks like he already regrets that question, no nothing is okay. Everything sucks and all you want to do is take a shower. 
“I want a shower.” You say looking back at the door. 
“Is someone in there? I can kick them out.” he offers, you sigh, shaking your head. He seems to get it and you hear him sigh. He steps up next to you putting his hand on your back. 
“I can help,” he says. You shake your head forcing yourself to be strong as your lip quivers. You have to try and do this alone. Your knuckles turn white as you grip your toothbrush as hard as you can. 
“I’ll watch the door, make sure no one comes in.” He says rubbing your back. You smile at him and nod, stepping into the room before you change your mind completely. 
The place smells damp as the automatic lights flicker on. It’s only been you and the rest of 141 using this space so their stuff is everywhere. You start to realise things about the room you didn’t even see before. It’s windowless, there’s a loud hum of vents. The place smells of aftershave and soap. 
You walk over to one of the showers, hanging your towel over the half wall. You’re stripping your clothes before you can stop yourself. This feels like a routine, showering in the freezing base showers only this time the thought of turning the showers on makes you feel sick.
You keep telling yourself you can do this, repeating the mantra in your head if only to keep your mind occupied. You’ve been taught how to deal with PTSD and triggers, what's the best way to help, or stave them away. You don’t have PTSD, you remind yourself. You’re just going through a rough patch.
As soon as you can get away from 141 and have a good night's sleep you’ll feel better. And now Johnny’s awake, that's one less thing to worry about. You reach over and twist the hot tap on. The water hits your arm and you pull it back like you’ve just been burned. 
You can do this. It’s just a shower. Kyle’s watching the door. No one can hurt you. 
You suck in a deep breath and stick your leg in, the water is surprisingly hot for once. That’s good, it will make things easier. One step at a time. Your hand and arm go in next, your breathing picks up, goosebumps rise on the parts of your body still exposed to the air. Now you’re shaking. 
You let out a long breath forcing yourself to move into the water. You turn letting it run down your back in an attempt to get the shaking to stop. It doesn’t work. Now you’re frozen you can’t move. You try to focus on getting your breathing to steady but it’s not working. You have nothing to distract yourself with. 
You force your eyes closed, that just makes things worse. Fear rises in you, you don’t know why but your head tips back. As soon as the water hits your face it’s like you don’t know where you are anymore. You’re not in the showers, you're back in the room. The water drowns out any sound in your ears. You don’t know what’s happening anymore.
The next thing you know you’re on the floor, your head throbs. There’s commotion, a noise you don’t recognise and footsteps. You open your eyes with a sob as tears escape. You turn, you must have slipped, Kyle is turning the shower off. He picks up your towel and comes over to you, bending down and wrapping it around you. He doesn’t say anything, just kneels down on the wet floor pulling you into his arms. 
You sob in his arms as he holds you tight. You get it all out, all the tears you’ve been avoiding over the last 24 hours. Maybe this is what you needed: a good cry. 
Kyle doesn’t let you go. Eventually he starts rocking you, stroking your hair, kissing the top of your head. He tells you everything will be okay. You want to believe him, you so badly want to leave this room and everything will be magically better. 
It won’t be though, and it won’t be for a very long time. 
As you calm down and your body stops shaking, anger burns in you. This should never have happened to you. Especially not by the people you love. You hate them, you never want to see them again. Kyle notices your change in body language and silently helps you to your feet. 
He walks you across to your room, closing the door behind him. 
“Want me to stay?” he asks as he helps you over to your bed. You nod looking up at him, he strokes your cheek smiling. “I’ll be back in a second.” He says going to leave the room. 
You don’t want to be alone, not right now. Maybe with Kyle here you can get some sleep. Or maybe it will be worse, right now you’ll try anything. You look over at Simon's lighter still sitting on the crate. You pick it up, turning it over in your hand before dropping it in the trash.
You never want to see them again.
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next
I could have kept going. I don't know when to stop... This is what happens when my main fic is on hold. I need a million projects or I get bored XD Banners by firefly-graphics
513 notes · View notes
vanteguccir · 11 months ago
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ㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤALL TOO WELL * CHRIS STURNIOLO
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SUMMARY :: where Chris misplace his priorities.
FEATURING Chris Sturniolo x reader REQUESTED? yes.
WARNINGS :: fighting, crying, cursing. ANGST with a happy ending.
AUTHOR'S NOTE :: that is my work, I DON'T authorize any form of plagiarism; copy, "inspiration" or translation! | english isn't my first language, so I'm sorry if there's any grammar error.
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Y/N felt her heart sink as she watched Chris frantically scrolling through his phone, barely paying attention to her. The silence in the living room echoed the tension that had been building between them over the past few weeks, the memory of the previous day's event still fresh in Y/N's mind.
༻﹡﹡﹡﹡﹡﹡﹡༺
Y/N sighed contentedly as she set the dark wooden table carefully, placing the plates and cutlery impeccably. She had spent the entire afternoon preparing Chris's favorite dish, with fresh ingredients, for the romantic dinner they had planned to have after the triplets recorded the video that would be posted next Friday. Everything was perfect, except for the emptiness that began to settle in her chest as the hours passed and Chris didn't appear.
At eight sharp, Y/N sat at the table, her heart filled with anticipation and anxiety. She watched the stairs leading to the front door with every sound she heard, willing him to come. But as the minutes dragged on, anxiety turned to despair.
Nine o'clock passed, and Y/N was still sitting alone at the table, her stomach churning with hunger and worry and her eyes staring into space, small tears burning her cornea. She tried calling Chris several times, but every call went to voicemail, as well as her messages going unread.
At ten o'clock, Y/N couldn't take it anymore. Thick tears began to stream down her face as she looked at the still untouched plate in front of her. The romantic dinner she had so lovingly prepared now seemed like a cruel reminder of her dashed hope.
With a choked sob, Y/N got up from the table, feeling completely desolate, her belly hurting from the weight and sobs that made her body shake. She carefully put the food away in the fridge, her hands shaking with disappointment.
That night, Y/N fell asleep in her boyfriend's room with a heavy heart and eyes swollen with tears, wondering if she would ever have the courage to take some initiative, before it was too late.
     ༻﹡﹡﹡﹡﹡﹡﹡༺
Y/N was standing in front of the cinema, her heart full of expectation as she held a bucket of popcorn in her hands. She looked from side to side nervously, trying to spot Chris among the crowds rushing along the sidewalk. Time was running out, and her nervousness increased as the clock on her phone showed just ten minutes until the start of the movie, and her boyfriend still hadn't appeared.
And then, as if a bucket of cold water had been poured over her, Y/N's phone vibrated, indicating a new message. She grabbed the device anxiously, hoping to see an apology or explanation from Chris for the delay. But what she heard was something that made her shake with rage.
"Hi, baby." Chris’s voice sounded through the voicemail, but instead of an apology, there was a note of indifference in his words. "I know we planned to go to the movies today, but a last-minute party came up that I really need to go to. Do you remember Tara Yummy? It's hers! Well, I'm sorry for canceling like that at the last minute. Maybe we can meet up later, okay? Bye."
Y/N felt her world collapse upon hearing those words. Chris's betrayal, his indifference to her feelings as he sent her the message just to break her as if it was some kind of promise, cut like a sharp knife. She clutched her phone tightly, fighting back the tears that threatened to spill over.
Anger and sadness consumed her, bubbling inside her chest like a volcano about to erupt. With a cry of frustration, Y/N threw the bucket of popcorn and the tickets into the nearest trash bin, tears streaming freely down her cheeks as she felt suffocated by disappointment and pain.
And that night, Y/N walked away from the cinema, her heart broken and her confidence destroyed.
     ༻﹡﹡﹡﹡﹡﹡﹡༺
"Chris." She began, shaking her head gently to shake the memories away, her voice trembling with the anguish she carried. "We need to talk."
Chris looked up from his phone for a moment, his tired eyes meeting hers briefly before returning to the bright screen in his hands.
"Not now, Y/N. I'm busy."
Those words hit Y/N like a punch in the stomach. She felt increasingly isolated and neglected, while Chris's world revolved around his career and his influential friends.
"You're always busy, Chris." Y/N murmured, fighting back the tears that threatened to escape her eyes. "There's never time for us."
Chris sighed, irritation rising across his skin like a shiver. He closed his eyes for a few seconds before looking up at the girl again, giving her a look full of hatred, which she had never seen before.
"I have responsibilities, Y/N. You know that. I can't just ignore my work to pay attention to you."
"I'm not asking you to ignore it." Y/N snapped, her voice rising in desperation. "I'm just asking for a little time for us. For our relationship. Yesterday you-"
Chris shook his head quickly, interrupting her, the traces of frustration deepening on his face.
"I already said I'm sorry! You always do this, Y/N. You're always trying to change who I am and what I do. You always try to change my priorities, like my world has to revolve around you. That's not how things work!"
Those words cut Y/N like a sharp blade, knocking all the air out of her lungs. She wasn't trying to change him. She just wanted to feel like he cared about her as much as he cared about his fame, but instead, he made her feel like a random crumpled up piece of paper.
"I just want you to include me in your life." Y/N whispered, her voice shaking with pain as her eyes blinked repeatedly, her eyelashes slowly becoming wet with tiny droplets from tears. "But it always seems like there's something more important."
Chris snorted, throwing the phone roughly onto his lap and turning abruptly to face her, an expression of disdain filling his eyes.
"You know what? Maybe it would be better if you took some time to think about what you really want, because it seems to me that everything I do isn't enough, and if you're not genuinely happy in this relationship, maybe you should evaluate your preferences!"
Chris' words echoed in Y/N's mind, leaving her stunned. She felt as if she had been hit by a train of conflicting emotions.
With a lump in her throat, the girl stood up from the couch abruptly, her legs shaking under the weight of her grief as her chest burned intensely, anguish gnawing at her insides.
"Maybe you're right." Y/N muttered, shrugging, her voice cracking with pain. "Maybe I need some time to figure out what I really want... Right?"
Chris watched in silence as Y/N walked away, her tears finally spilling freely down her cheeks, her lips pressed into a thin line tightly in an attempt to stop the sobs that wanted to escape.
The brunette frowned, watching his girlfriend's wet cheeks against the cool light of the room, feeling his chest hurt and his throat tighten, begging to call her back, and apologize, but the words seemed to get stuck.
And so, Y/N left the triplets house that night, taking with her a broken heart and a soul full of uncertainty about the future of their relationship.
     ༻﹡﹡﹡﹡﹡﹡﹡༺
The frigid night air bit into Chris' skin as he walked through the empty streets of LA, his body shaking not only from the cold but also from the anxiety and remorse that consumed him. He couldn't bear another night without Y/N by his side, without feeling her comforting touch and hearing her soft laugh filling the silence.
His steps were heavy and slow, each carrying the weight of days of loneliness and regret that piled up on his shoulders. The memory of Y/N's desolate and disappointed face haunted his thoughts, an image that haunted him incessantly, preventing him from finding peace even at bedtime.
Chris knew he had done wrong, that he had hurt the person he loved most in the world with his negligence and misplaced priorities. He blamed himself for his actions, for putting his work and his friends before her, for leaving her alone and helpless at times when she needed him most, or just wanted his company and love.
The mere memory of coming home on Thursday before everything fell apart, and finally seeing all the lost messages from his girl, along with a plate full of his favorite food neatly packed in the fridge made his heart ache as if human hands were squeezing it.
As he made his way through the deserted streets, the silence of the night was deafening, a cruel metaphor for the loneliness he had caused himself. Each step brought him closer to the home that had once been his refuge, the place where he found comfort in Y/N's arms and where he hoped he could right the wrongs he had done.
Finally, the brunette arrived at the door of the small, simple house, his heart beating wildly in his chest as he hesitated to ring the doorbell. He knew he didn't deserve Y/N's forgiveness, that his empty words and broken promises couldn't erase the pain he caused.
But he had to try. He had to show her that he was sorry, that he loved her more than anything in this world, and that he would do anything to have her back by his side.
With a shaky sigh, Chris finally pressed the doorbell and waited, his heart hammering in his chest as he crossed his arms, shifting his weight from one leg to the other in an act of nervousness, the cold of the night penetrating his bones.
On the other side of the door, Y/N hesitated, her heart beating wildly in her chest as she tried to gather the courage to face the stranger that was there. The last few days had been a storm of sadness and loneliness, her mind spinning in circles of anguish as she struggled to understand what had happened between her and Chris, where everything went wrong.
When she finally mustered enough courage to turn the doorknob, what she saw made her freeze in place. Chris was there, standing in front of her, his eyes red and swollen from crying. His face was contorted into an expression of pain and regret, and Y/N felt her heart tighten even more at the sight of the person she loved so much in a deplorable state.
"Chris." Y/N murmured, her voice barely above a whisper as she tried to process the scene before her eyes.
Chris didn't say anything, he couldn't. He just sobbed, thick tears flowing freely down his cheeks as he fought to contain the overwhelming emotions that overwhelmed him. His body shook violently, each sob a painful reminder of all the mistakes he had made in the last few weeks.
Y/N felt tears in her own eyes as she looked at him, her heart breaking at the pain she saw reflected in his eyes. Without thinking, she stepped forward and wrapped Chris in a tight hug, letting him cry on her shoulder as she gently stroked his hair, her own tears silently streaming down her cheeks.
For long minutes, they stayed there, lost in each other's arms that transcended the words and hurts. It was as if, in that moment, their wounded souls found a refuge in each other, a source of comfort and peace amid the chaos their lives had become.
"Baby! B-baby, I'm- I'm so sorry, so fucking sorry-" The boy's words came out in broken sobs, his words almost incomprehensible.
Y/N closed her eyes and took a deep breath, her heart clenching by her own pain. With a sigh, she pulled away lightly, holding his hand firmly and gently guiding him into her house, closing the door behind them, the warmth of the walls enveloping their cold bodies.
Y/N led Chris over to the living room couch, keeping a cautious distance as he sat down next to her on the cushioned seat. Uncomfortable silence hung between them, filled with tension and unspoken emotions, as Y/N waited patiently for Chris to find the words to express what was in his heart.
Finally, after a long moment, Chris broke the silence, his voice still cracked from his recent crying.
"Baby, I... I know I was wrong. I know I hurt you deeply with my actions, and I never wanted to make you feel that way."
Chris sighed, running a hand through his disheveled hair as he tried to find the right words, his right leg bouncing up and down in anxiety.
"I was so obsessed with YouTube, with my success, that I ended up neglecting the most important thing in my life: you. I got lost in the cool lights and the adrenaline of fame, and I forgot how much you mean to me. And I'm so fucking sorry for that." His lower lip trembled slightly, making him trap it between his teeth.
The boy's words cut deep into Y/N, reigniting the pain and hurt she had kept inside. She felt tempted to step away to protect her heart from the possibility of being hurt again. But something in Chris's eyes made her hesitate, something she recognized as genuine regret and love.
"Chris..." Y/N began, her voice shaky and filled with uncertainty. "You don't understand how much it hurt me every time you kept me waiting, every time you put your work and your friends before me. I felt so alone, so unappreciated."
"I know, Y/N. And I'm sorry, from the bottom of my heart. I would do anything to make things right, to prove that you're my real priority." Chris lowered his head, frowning and fixing his eyes on his legs, guilt weighing on his shoulders.
Y/N raised her right hand, taking it to his chin covered with the beard he had let grow in the last few days, pushing it up so that she could look into his eyes, seeing the sincerity and desperation reflected there.
She wanted to believe him and wanted to open her heart to forgiveness and the possibility of a future together again. But the pain of everything that had been done brought her such insecurity that she knew she needed time to heal.
"I don't know, Chris." Y/N murmured, the hand that was holding his chin falling with a thud onto her lap. "I'm still hurt, I'm still trying to process everything that happened. I don't know if I can just forgive and forget."
Chris swallowed hard, fear evident in his eyes as his mind screamed at him to do everything, anything. Even if he needed to kneel in front of his girl to get her back.
"Please, Y/N. I promise I'll do everything to make this right, to be the boyfriend you deserve. Just give me a chance to prove that I can change."
Y/N looked at him again, seeing the vulnerability in his gaze. She knew it wouldn't be easy, but there was something about Chris, something she couldn't ignore, something that gave her hope that maybe, just maybe, they could find their way back to the way they were before.
With a resigned sigh, Y/N reached her hand out to Chris again, taking his and intertwining their fingers tightly, her heart warming with the touch she had missed so much.
"I forgive you, Chris." She murmured, her voice sounding soft but her eyes carrying an indescribable firmness. "But know that things are going to have to change. Your priorities are going to have to take the right path this time."
© vanteguccir
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1K notes · View notes
morganaawriterr · 27 days ago
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˗ˏˋ ★ ˎˊ˗ Wildflower;
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Synopsis; Sunghoon loves you, but guilt eats away at him—because you are his best friend’s ex. Every time you say I love you, his silence cuts deeper, making you question if he truly wants you or is just using you. Torn between love and loyalty, Sunghoon struggles to move forward. But when faced with the possibility of losing you, he must decide—finally cross that line or risk destroying what you have.
Pairing; fem!reader X boyfriend!Park Sunghoon (ft Jake) Genre; Angst (happy ending...kinda) Words; 1.5k Warning; Brief mentions of sex; heavy feelings; JakeHoon kinda; — Inspired by the song 'Wildflower' by Billie Eilish Author's Note: HEHEHE im suprise dropping this because I feel like it. I wanted this to be a long story but couldn't make it happen so I made this small thing. I like it a lot, I think it's deep and vulnerable like I wanted to be. I hope you enjoy getting your heart broken! As always, thank you so much for all the love, likes, and reblogs are always appreciated! Masterlist
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Inside the large, cozy bedroom, warm sunrays reflected off your bare back. The scent of sex still lingered in the air.
“I love you…” you whisper, out of breath, as you turn your exhausted body onto your side. Your head rests in your hand as you glance at your boyfriend lovingly.
Sunghoon lies on his back, hands behind his head, still trying to catch his breath. Hearing your words, he turns his head to face you. As his eyes land on you, he thinks you couldn’t look more beautiful—flushed face, sweaty body, and a deep love dripping from your gaze as you stare at him.
Against his will, his mind shifts to him… Did you look this pretty in his eyes, too? Did you tell him you loved him after sex as well? He can’t help but think about it, the guilt swallowing him alive every time he gets closer to you. It’s his best friend we’re talking about—how could he not feel bad for loving you?
As you wait for Sunghoon to respond, you notice the way he’s focused on something else, his eyes locked onto yours but distant. His eyebrows are drawn together, his lips pressed into a thin line. This always happens—every time you tell him how you feel, he becomes quiet and withdrawn.
The sudden rustling of sheets shakes Sunghoon out of his trance, but when he opens his mouth to speak, he realizes you’re already walking toward the bathroom. He feels like trash every time he ignores your words because he knows how much they mean to you. He’s trying so hard to forget how deeply he’s attached to you, but you keep reminding him.
He closes his eyes and takes a deep breath, frustration building inside him. It’s been weeks since you first said you loved him—this was the fourth time. But he still couldn’t bring himself to say it back. Sunghoon knows it hurts you every time your words hang in the air, waiting for something in return that never comes.
Knowing he’s messed up again, Sunghoon gets out of bed and walks to the bathroom. His palms are sweaty as he faces the door, his heart skipping a beat in worry. He knocks softly, and after a few seconds of silence, you unlock it and open the door. Sunghoon knows you need space when you’re upset, but he can’t let you sit with the thought that he’s just using you.
“I’m sorry, baby…” Sunghoon murmurs as he steps inside the small, tiled room.
You stand in front of the sink, staring at your reflection in the mirror. Your eyes are red and wet, small drops of water weighing your lashes down. You don’t say anything as he steps inside—you just turn to face him.
It isn’t easy to look at him, not with this pain so heavy in your heart. Slowly, you lower your head, the weight of his words—or lack thereof—cutting even deeper. What is he sorry for? For not loving you? The thought of him using you for nothing but pleasure makes your stomach twist with nausea.
Tears form in your eyes, and though you try to keep them in, they start falling—hot and heavy.
The atmosphere inside the small bathroom was heavy, your quiet sobs echoing off the walls. Even the sun seemed to sense what was happening, fading away and leaving the space dim and moody.
Sunghoon’s hand reached for your chin, gently lifting it, forcing you to face him. As his eyes met yours—so sad and overflowing with emotion—he felt himself start to tear up. He hated seeing you cry, especially when he knew it was his fault.
His touch burned into your skin as your gaze never wavered from his. Your heart pounded, your palms slick with sweat as you gripped the sink for support. You watched as Sunghoon’s eyes flickered between yours, like he was trying to piece together the right words. You felt exposed, vulnerable—standing naked in front of him, crying. You hated the heavy feeling that always lingered after telling him how you felt.
As small, salty tears rolled down your cheeks, Sunghoon caught them with his fingers—a sweet attempt to comfort you. He had so much to say, the words lingering at the tip of his tongue, but he just… couldn’t. He was never good with words.
Instead, he wrapped his arms around your waist and pulled you into his warm embrace, hoping you could feel what he couldn’t say. As you rested your head on his shoulder and felt his grip tighten around you, you let your tears fall freely.
The guilt burned like a fever, consuming him. Sunghoon was terrified of what would happen if Jake found out he was dating you. You—Jake’s ex. You had dated two years ago. You were Jake’s first love, and Sunghoon still remembered the way his best friend had smiled when he told him you had finally said yes. He also remembered how devastated Jake had been when it ended. It wasn’t a messy breakup, but it had broken him all the same.
You and Sunghoon had only started talking two years later, on a random Tuesday at the library. You had ended up in the same study group. He tried to avoid you at first, unsure if you even remembered him, but your adorable smile was impossible to ignore. When you two became closer, he told himself he didn’t feel anything for you. He tried so hard. But you were so beautiful, so smart, so safe. And he fell. Deeper and deeper.
“What’s on your mind?” you whisper against his skin, unable to look at him.
“Jake.” Sunghoon finally confesses. That’s when everything clicks into place—the uncertainty he’s been showing you, the distance, the hesitation.
“Sunghoon,” you call softly, lifting your head from his embrace to meet his eyes. “I know you feel guilty—I do too. But we can’t stop living our lives because of the past. Jake and I are on good terms, you know this. It felt wrong at first, I admit it, but Sunghoon, I love you. So fucking much it makes my heart ache.”
“I know all of that, Y/N, but he’s my best friend. And he loved you.” Sunghoon insists, the burn in his chest melting his ability to think clearly.
“I loved him too,” you say, frustration creeping into your voice. “But I love you now.”
Deep inside his mind, he wonders—who did you love more? Jake or him?
He and Jake are so different. Sunghoon is calm and quiet, while Jake is energetic and talkative. Jake used to show you off, unable to keep his mouth shut, making you blush in front of everyone. But Sunghoon is more subtle. He holds you close all the time, though no words are said.
If he asked, you would tell him you love his peaceful kind of love. You love his small gestures more than Jake’s loud words—because you never felt them, not like you do with Sunghoon.
You stand still in front of him, your eyes wandering over his serious face. Somehow, he manages to look even more attractive—his jaw tight, his gaze intense as he stares right into you. Though you have so much to say, you stay quiet, realizing that maybe Sunghoon needs time and space to think about the two of you.
“I understand if you want to break up,” you say seriously, “but I would never forgive you.”
With that, you gently push past him, stepping outside to get dressed.
But Sunghoon grabs your wrist, stopping you. You turn back, watching his Adam’s apple bob up and down as he swallows nervously.
“I love you, Y/N. So much…” he finally confesses, his heart pounding in his chest. “I don’t want to break up. I want you. I’m sorry I couldn’t say it earlier.” His voice is deep, steady, his eyes locked onto yours, trying to assure you of his words.
It feels like all the weight on your shoulders has lifted, and you can finally breathe. You hold his gaze, staring into his warm brown irises, searching for any sign of discomfort or doubt. But you find none—just small, shimmering tears and a big, relieved smile.
Slowly, you lean in, needing to feel his warm lips against yours—to seal the promise. Sunghoon meets you halfway, pressing his lips softly to yours, the salty taste of tears lingering on your tongue. The kiss is slow, deep, his lips molding into yours with such passion it melts your mind. His arms tighten around your waist as you deepen the kiss, your mouth exploring his.
When you part to catch your breath, your hands travel to his hair, playing with the small strands at the nape of his neck. His forehead rests against yours, his breath warm against your skin.
He might have crossed the line—but at least, he had you.
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munsonsmixtapes · 5 months ago
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Put it on My Tab
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bouncer!!logan x bartender!fem!reader
summary: You’re a bartender at the club where Logan is a bouncer and he’s going to deny his feelings for you until he’s convinced himself that he’s lost his chance.
cw: hurt/comfort
“Do you really think you can get away with this?” Logan asked the girl who was standing in front of him. She clearly wasn’t of age and the photo on the fake she had handed him hadn’t even resembled her. And the cherry on top that was that “Minnesota” was missing one of the n’s.
“And do you really expect me to believe that you were born in 1988? You don’t even look like you could have been born in 1998. I can’t let you in, kid.” He could see that the girl was crying and to the untrained eye, she definitely could have been. But Logan had been in the business long enough to know that she was just trying to garner sympathy, which never worked on him. Crying, if anything, just made the man feel uncomfortable. 
“You’re such a dick,” she cried as she watched him bend the ID right before her eyes. It wouldn’t be the first time he was called that and it certainly wouldn’t have been the last. 
The ID was tossed into the trash can right next to him and he waved the next person forward as the girl slowly moved out of the way, making her sobs louder and more pathetic as a way to get him to change his mind, but he wouldn’t. He never did. 
“You’re good,” he told the man as he glanced over his ID before handing it back. The job got monotonous, but it was definitely better than being Wolverine, as far as how easy it was. And it definitely wasn’t stressful unless there was a fight he needed to break up, but security usually handled it before he got there. 
He actually loved his job, if he was being honest, but that was really only because of you. The second he laid eyes on you, he was convinced that he was in love. Maybe. He didn’t know what love felt like, but all he knew was that he liked you. A lot. Even though he was going to convince himself that he didn’t. He tried to be mean to you to make you leave him alone, but that only made you want to see him more. And let’s be honest, as soon as you flashed him that megawatt smile, he was done for. His legs felt like jelly and he couldn’t help but smile back even though it felt very foreign. 
And as soon as you told him he had a pretty one, he was smiling all the time for you, just begging for you to say it again, and you did. If it wasn't that, you were calling him nicknames which would have usually angered him, but since they were coming from your lips, he hardly minded.
The night seemed to drag on as he counted down the minutes until he could have a drink at the bar, just you and him as everyone else had gone home. You had insisted on staying, giving him a drink in exchange for a ride home that he always gladly gave you once the alcohol was out of his system.
He smiled as he saw that his glass of whiskey was sitting on the bar, but you were nowhere to be found. He supposed that maybe you were in the back, neatening up the space. But when he went to check the back room, his heart sank as he saw you giggling with Brett, the bar back.
He had seen the two of you doing that exact thing on multiple occasions and it made him sick, angry even. Even though he didn’t feel like he had a right to be because the two of you were just friends. And perhaps that was what he was convincing himself that he was to you. Even though he wanted to be more. Even though he often fantasized about kissing you right in front of Brett to show him what was what. And on some occasions, he imagined bending you over the bar and having his way with you. Pounding into you, making you tell him who exactly it was who owned your cunt.
“Oh, hey, handsome,” you greeted with that smile that always drove him crazy and he couldn’t help but mimic your actions. Because the truth was that he couldn’t be mad at you if he tried. You somehow had broken down his walls brick by brick and had even managed to thaw his frozen heart.
“Hi,” he replied, trying his best to not let his literal claws come out, trying to keep his cool and do those breathing exercises that you had worked on with him.
“Hey, Leonard, was it?” Brett asked, averting his gaze to Logan and the man was close to rocking his shit, you could see it.
“It’s Logan,” you corrected. “I’m all good here, Brett, if you want to head out.”
“Okay, cool,” he nodded and clapped you on the back before weaving his way through the maze of boxes, moving quickly past Logan and fleeing the room, leaving the two of you alone.
You stared him, covering your lips with the tips of your fingers in an attempt to hold back the laugh that was threatening to escape your throat. And Logan was not having it. The night was long and he was just ready to go home, his whiskey that he so desperately wanted, getting watered down by the second.
You stepped forward, pushing the boxes out of the way, moving to stand on front of him. Your arms wrapped around his shoulders and you gave him a warm smile only for him to turn away from you, his signature scowl making its way back upon his face.
Without a word, you grabbed hold of his chin and forced him to look you in the eyes, still trying to hold that smile, desperate to see his own, the one that was specifically for you.
“Smile for me,” you commanded, your voice still soft. He showed you his teeth, but there was no actual smile. “Logan,” you giggled. “Just for me? Please?”
He smiled then, showing you his teeth and you felt your heart swell, knowing that you were the only person who could make him do it. And your heart leapt as you saw it slowly appearing on his face, pulling him into a hug.
“I’m not with Brett, by the way,” you changed the subject rather quickly. “He’s just a friend. More like a brother actually.”
"What?" He asked, his eyebrows furrowing and you desperately wanted to smooth them out, to find a way to help his mind stop from reeling.
"I'm not with Brett," you repeated, closing the space between the two of you, reaching up to move a piece of hair that had fallen to his forehead, putting it back in place.
“You say that as if it’s supposed to mean somethin’” he muttered, his signature frown making a reappearance.
“I thought it did," you shrugged. "Because if looks could kill, he’d definitely be dead.”
He just glared at you and you smiled again, wrapping your arms tighter around his neck while his stayed by your side. His hands were itching to hold you and he was trying to fight it off, trying to convince himself that he wasn't so desperately, hopelessly in love with you.
"And it should mean something to you." Your finger poked his chest and he just stared back at you, clearly missing the point of what you were trying to get at.
"Why?" His head tilted to the side like a little puppy and you just sighed, wondered why he wasn't understanding what you were trying to say. Wasn't it obvious? Maybe you were being too vague, but you were sure that you had said everything you could to get your point across except the actual words.
"Because," you rolled your eyes. "Look at the facts, Logan. We both know I get a lot of people asking to take me home every night and I let the grumpy bouncer drive me home. What does that say to you?"
"That you aren't looking for anything." You let out a sigh of frustration and shook your head, making Logan even more nervous. What was it that you needed to tell him and why did you need to say it in the back room of your place of work?
"Oh geez, I guess I'm going to have to spell it out for you, aren't I?" You chuckled nervously and Logan felt his heart pound in his chest as it all finally clicked in his head. Your hands rested on his cheeks and you looked into pretty hazel eyes.
"Logan, I'm in love with you," you said, watching his his widen, his mouth falling open as the six words set in. He just stared at you in response and you were beginning to take that as rejection.
Your arms slipped from his neck and seeing the look on your face was enough to break his heart into a million little pieces. And as he watched you make you way your way out of the back room, he could have sworn that he could see you wiping tears away from your cheeks.
You were leaving. You were leaving and he was just going to let you. You were quickly slipping through his fingers as the seconds passed and he felt sick to his stomach thinking about the possibility of losing you.
So he ran. He ran as fast as he possibly could, following you out to the parking lot where you were heading to your car that you had actually driven there for once. You stopped to pull your keys out of your purse and Logan took the chance to stand in front of you, stopping you from moving.
"Get out of my way," you commanded, but he just stood there, staring you down.
"No," he said firmly. "Not until I'm done speaking. And then you can keep hating me, but I need to get this out, okay?" He took a deep breath before speaking again. "I'm in love with you," he said. "I'm so in love with you that it hurts. I've never felt this way about anyone and honestly didn't think that you reciprocated my feelings, so when you told me that you loved me, I don't know...I just panicked." He was talking a mile a minute and you honestly barely understood him, ut you got the jist.
"So please don't leave," he pleaded his hands finding your waist. "Stay, because I don't know what I'd do with myself if you left."
"You love me?"
"More than you'll ever know, doll," he replied and pulled you into a kiss, neither of you bothered by the loud sound of your keys and purse falling to ground as your arms found their way to his neck once again. "Now let's get out of here."
"But what about the whiskey," you asked against his lips and he just chuckled.
"Just put it on my tab," he replied before pulling you in for another kiss.
You stayed like that until the early morning, kissing and giggling to each other, sitting on the hood of your car to watch the sunset together then heading back to your place for some much needed sleep before talking about how you were going to move forward over coffee and breakfast.
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bookworrm1999 · 20 days ago
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How Far Away? Part 2
Caleb x Mc
Tags: unplanned pregnancy, presumed death, depression, miscommunication
Summary: Mc and Caleb fight right before he goes on a long mission into space. Caleb ends up MIA while Mc finds out she’s pregnant. She struggles to deal with the grief while Caleb is fighting for his life to make it back home to her.
Ao3
Part 1 | Part 2 | Part 3 | Part 4 | Part 5 | Part 6 | Part 7 | Part 8 | Part 9 | Part 10 | Part 11 | Part 12
Epilogue
2 weeks had passed but time dragged on slow for you.
You were back at your place and back to work. Being in Caleb’s home without him there was both comforting but so very lonely.
You didn’t know if it was the depression, the loneliness, or the memory of Caleb’s small sob that you had caught that last day you were together.
But you weren’t eating, your clothes felt a little looser but you felt a little bloated in your lower stomach.
Maybe it was your period coming…
This thought stuck with you as you filled out your report. Tara stopped by your desk, eyes glittering with worry.
“Are you doing ok?”
You muster up a smile and laugh
“Yeah I’m fine, why?”
“Your face looks worn and skinny. Are you eating ok?”
“Just had a bit of a stomach bug.”
The captain was walking nearby, she stopped hearing your words and turned to look at you with narrowed eyes.
“You’re sick?”
“Uh, I think so, maybe? I’ve felt like I have been anyways.”
“Go home early today and go see your doctor. We don’t need a virus sweeping through the association and leaving us with minimal staff.”
You sighed, you should’ve kept your mouth shut.
Typing up the last words on your most recent take down of a rogue wanderer. You catch a rare glimpse of your partner Xavier.
His eyes seemed to scan you as he asked
“Are you okay?”
You throw your hands up in exasperation and stand up to leave for the day.
“Not you too! I’m fine, don’t worry.”
He kept his eyes on you as you gathered your coat and bag.
“If you’re sure…”
“Yes I’m sure Xavier, good night.”
You didn’t bother putting on your coat as you left the building. You grabbed your phone and dialed the doctor's office.
“Akso Hospital, how can I help you?”
“Hi, I’d like to make an appointment to see Doctor Zayne as soon as possible.”
“Can I have your patient number?”
As you boarded the subway to head home, you read off your number. The city started to pass you by as you waited in silence.
“Actually he has an opening tonight at 6 PM, can you make it?”
You check the time, it’s 5:15 PM. Just enough time to stop somewhere and grab a protein drink since that’s all you can stomach.
“Yes I can make it, thank you.”
“We will see you at 6 then. Goodbye.”
“Bye.”
You slip your phone into your pocket and lay your head on the window. Your stomach churns, but you haven’t felt hunger since Caleb left.
All that food he had made, it was all wasted.
He had packed it up all neatly in the fridge for you but you had spent the few days left at his house over the toilet.
So it had gone into the trash, making you feel horrible. Who knows when you’d get to taste his cooking again?
Who knows what your relationship would be like when he got home?
Caleb had left you that little note saying he was sorry, it was tucked into the case of your phone.
A physical reminder for you that he had really been here.
He wouldn’t be back for 4 months though. Keeping yourself busy was the only way to avoid sinking into the deep rut you could feel coming on.
Your long sigh fogged up the glass, winter was coming.
Getting off the subway, you headed to a nearby cafe. Inside the atmosphere was warm but all your focus was on that sad beige drink in a carton inside the fridge rack.
You grabbed it and waited in line.
Spacing out at first but a familiar voice caught your attention.
“I’ll pay for her drink too.”
“Zayne?”
“Going to workout?” You glanced down at your protein drink and laughed a bit.
“No, just about all I can stomach these days.”
You followed him to the side of the counter where he grabbed his presumably sickeningly sweet treat in a box.
Zayne frowned a bit before asking
“Are you sick?”
“I think so. I actually have an appointment here with you soon at 6. My boss insisted I go check before I go back to work.”
He nodded a bit before holding the door open for you.
“I’ll walk you there then.”
Companionable silence follows you down the streets. As do all you thoughts of Caleb.
You can’t help but feel that the reason he was so scared to define your relationship is because of what the Fleet higher ups might do.
All the secrets and what they were up to. Caleb wanted to keep you out of it but he also wanted you next to him.
It was quite the conundrum, you got it.
But it wasn’t fair to either of you.
Sighing deeply, letting out a waft of visible breath in front of you.
Oh well, you’d have to wait for him to come home to even fix things.
No communication was possible between ground and deepspace.
You followed Zayne in silence up to his office. He motioned the receptionist to check you in as he watched you with worried eyes.
You were uncharacteristically quiet.
Zayne set his box down at his desk and took a seat, he motioned at the seat in front of him for you to sit.
Sitting without a word, you could tell your silence unnerved him.
But you didn’t have the energy to play polite right now.
“What are your symptoms?” He brought up your vitals while asking you specifics.
“I’ve been feeling nauseous all through the day, been a bit a dizzy but that’s probably because I haven’t been eating much. I don’t have much of an appetite and I think I’ve lost a little weight.”
“You look like you haven’t been sleeping well either.”
Averting your eyes, you deflect
“That doesn’t have to do with this.”
“Mmmm, if you insist.”
He flicks through your vitals before something catches his attention.
“Are you sexually active?”
This question startles you a bit but you answer hesitantly
“Yes… what does that have to do with anything. Wait…. are you saying?”
“Yes. I’m seeing evidence of you being pregnant. Looks like it’s 5 weeks along but we can do some more in depth scans to be sure.”
You don’t hear anything after that.
Feeling a mixture of dread, wonder, happiness, and wondering how the hell you were going to deal with this?
“Was this a wanted pregnancy?” This question snapped you out of your spiral.
“Well I didn’t even know that I was pregnant! But….. yes, I think so.” Caleb’s baby. You bring your hands to your slightly bloated abdomen.
Ah, that’s why.
You hadn’t even noticed that your period was late in all the turmoil.
“I can give you a referral to an OB if that’s what you prefer.”
“Yes thank you, I appreciate it.”
He sends you some virtual information and lets you know that you should read the e-book on what to expect.
“Thank you Zayne.”
“Right, well you should get home. The information I sent you should have some foods that may be easier to keep down. I would suggest reviewing those and actually eating something. The weight you’ve lost already isn’t great for the baby or you.”
You suddenly feel guilty, not that you knew that you were pregnant but it still made you feel bad.
“Yes thank you Zayne, good night.”
You start to head out but he calls your name out so you stop to look back at him expectantly.
He seems to swallow a bit harshly before uttering
“Congratulations”
Smiling for real for the first time in half a month, you glow at him
“Thank you!”
You head out and head home.
Caleb may be gone for now but he had left you something very precious.
You hadn’t thought that you would be pregnant in your relationship quite this soon but you did what this baby. It was Caleb’s after all.
Wait
Caleb.
He doesn’t know and you have no way of telling him. He won’t be gone for the whole pregnancy but he was going to miss a lot of the early important milestones.
You don’t even know if he wants the baby.
No no, you shake your head.
He would definitely want this baby.
Determined now, you reach your apartment and sit on your couch while sipping your sad protein drink.
Using your phone, you look at the list of foods in the information Zayne sent over.
Crackers, ginger, fruits, a lot of mild and still somewhat sad foods but it was better than a protein drink.
Quickly tabbing over to a delivery app, you load up on early pregnancy foods to be sent over that night.
Task completed, you stretch back over the couch.
What a long day.
Oh! You could write letters and send Caleb voice as well as video messages so that when he gets back he’ll have a total record of what happened.
That way he could still be a part of it in some way.
Settling down into the couch, you hold your phone up to record your face.
“Hi Caleb! Guess what!?”
Making a show out of it, you bring your face close to the camera and glare at the imaginary Caleb.
“You got me pregnant! All those times you told me you would just pull out have come back to bite you. I told you so!”
You laugh a bit before continuing
“But really, I’m excited. I miss you so much so this is like having a small piece of you with me always.”
You look down where you had been unconsciously rubbing that small bloat that really wasn’t a true bump yet.
“Oh do you want to see?”
You place the phone on the coffee table, propping it up against your fake plant.
“See! It’s not a true bump but you can feel the firmness and see my little soon to be bump.”
You run your hand over it to exaggerate it. Smiling down sadly before glancing back at the camera.
“I wish you had been here to find out with me. You would’ve probably fainted if I had taken a test to check and I showed you the positive result. And don’t tell me you wouldn’t have!”
You tear up a bit at the thought of him being gone for all this.
“I wish you were here…”
You grabbed your phone and brought it back to your face again.
“But I’ll send you lots of updates! So you can see them all when you get back! I love you Caleb. Come home soon okay?”
You stop the recording, sending it to him. Knowing he wouldn’t see it for a few months. But you were just glad to make him a part of the process somehow.
All the while, unaware that Caleb may never come home to you.
Tags: @moonberry69 @supermyeon22 @tinnyrabbit @gavin3469 @midiplier @tabi-callico
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revelboo · 21 days ago
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Revel my eternal saviour, I plead more tarn and my life is yours. Seriously that cliffhanger!!!!! Aaack!
Sure!
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L.G. Fuad Pt 9
Tarn x Reader
• Head lowering, he leans into your space. That anger still sizzling through him and you cringe, chirping fearfully as your head turns away, eyes closing. And you’re repeating something in your language, voice breaking. Freezing when he recognizes you’re trying to say his name amid whatever else you’re saying. Venting against you, he should take some satisfaction in your obvious fear. In scaring you into never trying that again, instead it leaves him unsettled. And still uncomfortably aware of his own frame’s response to you.
• “I’m sorry, Tarn, I’m sorry,” babbling apologies because he’s angrier than you’ve ever seen him. Snarling at you and you shudder when he presses his masked face against your throat and you can feel him venting against you, one of his hands pinning both of yours above your head. And you gasp when he catches your chin and forces your head to turn his way as his own head lifts. Growling something at you that sounds furious. “I’m sorry.” That little glimpse of his face hadn’t been worth his anger or your life. Because he’s that angry. “Tarn, please.”
• “Anyone else who tried that would be dead right now,” he whispers, tapping a servo against your soft cheek until you open your eyes. And his anger fizzles somewhat, those frightened eyes leaking. “Anyone else,” he repeats, voice strained. Still aroused and angry and frustrated with you, everything mixing together into a bitter confusion. And you’re still brokenly chirping his name, breath hitching and leaking even more. “Stop that,” he growls, unconsciously modulating his voice. Using his outlier ability on you.
• It’s like someone cut your strings, body just going limp. Aware of yourself, of the weight of your body in a way you’ve never been before. Unable to breathe. Lungs just refusing to draw in a breath. Unable to twitch a finger or blink. Just staring up at those red optics as panic claws at you. Him. It’s him. Hear him growl as your lungs burn and know without knowing how that he’d done this to you somehow. Trapped you in your own body while it slowly dies because you’d made him angry.
• Freezing when you just stop, eyes staring at nothing. Little chest no longer rising and he realizes what he’s done. Hadn’t meant to no matter how angry he was. Didn’t want this. “Breathe,” he growls. “Live for me.” Pouring his ability into the words, willing you to obey and you take a shuddering, terrified breath. And immediately go wild, trashing and bucking in his grip. Screaming at him as he hooks an arm around you and sits back to drag you into his lap. Pinning you as you fight to escape him, sobbing. He’d lost control. Used his ability without meaning to. That shouldn’t be possible. You shouldn’t be able to affect him like you do. To not only want you that way, but to let you get under his plating. Cupping your head against his chassis, his servos are shaking as it sinks in just how dangerous you are. You’re a threat.
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bluekidchaos · 1 year ago
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I don't need to know where we begin and end (I'd still know you)
there is so little haymitch smut so i made some myself :3 might write a similar fic to this but no smut only angst and fluff maybe..
Pairing: Haymitch Abernathy x reader
Warnings: 18+, fluff and smut, nightmares, panic, unprotected sex, technically age gap but it's not mentioned, pet names (sweetheart and baby), no use of pronouns but female parts mentioned
Words: 841
Can also be read on AO3!
Back to masterlist.
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You wake up with a scream, sweat dripping down your forehead as you pant. You feel arms holding you down and you trash in a panic trying to get loose, your ears are ringing and you look around the room frantically catching your breath and trying to reassure yourself that you are safe at home and not in the arena. 
Your eyes land on Haymitch, who is fully awake next to you, holding you in his arms and shushing you. His voice finally cuts through the ringing and you hear the panic in his own voice. 
"Sweetheart, you're safe, you're in district 12. Not in the arena." He's petting your hair and rocking you slowly. "I'm here with you, it's alright."
You turn in his arm and cling to him, sobbing into his chest and he holds you tight. The pressure of his arms around you grounds you as he keeps talking, telling you you are safe and he's there for you. 
When you had calmed down a bit more he asked what he could do to help you, always being so caring and gentle in moments like these. 
"Distract me, please?" You answered as you kissed him sweetly. He nodded and kissed you back, a bit more intensely.
Haymitch used his weight to position you on your back again with him leaning over you, still kissing you. One of his hands cupped your cheek, his thumb tracing your bottom lip and pulling it down a bit. He used the opening to slip his tongue inside your mouth, letting it glide against your own. You moaned into his mouth and bucked your hips against his thigh. 
His lips traveled down your neck, sucking and nipping at all the right places, leaving little marks in his path. Neither of you bothered undressing properly, only pulling up your sleep shirt to expose your chest so he could wrap his lips around your nipples. 
Haymitch was only in a pair of pajama pants so your hand dragged down his stomach towards his cock. Nails scraped over the sensitive scars there before dipping below his waistband and wrapping around his hard member. He let out a groan at the feeling of your warm hand around him.
His own hand slipped down to pull your panties down, fingers dipping into your heat. Spreading your lips apart and smearing your wetness over your clit. Rubbing his finger gently in a circular motion and adding more pressure with every swipe. 
Your head drops to Haymitch's shoulder as you moan out at his movements, panting into the space between his neck and shoulder. You plant light kisses over his neck, "Please, fuck me Haymitch..." Words trailing off as his hand once again quickens its pace. 
He groaned at your desperate whines and nodded his head eagerly. 
He moves his hand to reach back to his bedside table to grab a condom but you stop him and lock eyes with him. He looks at you confused for a second. "I really wanna feel you, just wanna feel you, all of you." 
"Fuck, sweetheart, of course-" Haymitch moves the two of you so your leg is slung over his waist and positions himself at your entrance, looking back up at you for consent before pushing inside in one move and moaning at the feeling of you. "God, baby, you're gonna be the death of me." Planting more kisses all over your face as he starts to move. 
Your hands plant themself on him, one around his shoulder to claw at his back with every thrust that hits your sweet spot, and one tangled into his hair. You used the leg not around his waist to help push yourself up and down on him, following his pace. Lips alternating between messy kisses and planting hickeys on each other, any surface of skin you could reach in your current position got covered in bruises and bite marks. 
Haymitch's hands hold you close to him, groping you and grabbing at your plush hips and ass to get you even closer. One hand lands on your thigh to help you move with him and the other sneaks down to your clit. Rubbing circles over you that makes you see stars. 
The room was silent except for the sound of your breaths and quiet moans. 
Your eyes lock with his, silently telling each other you're close, your cunt clenching down on him hard while his hips stutter in their pace as he's pushing the last few times before you fall over the edge. Haymitch's orgasm is just behind. 
Lips attaching as he fucks you through your orgasms. Heavy breaths, high-pitched moans, and low growls carry through the room as you both calm down. 
None of you bothered to untangle your limbs, just staying in each other's arms and laying in the afterglow. Haymitch's arms hugged you close to him, his hand stroking your back lightly. "You feel any better, sweetheart?" 
You chuckled in his arms, planting a final kiss on his lips with a smile, "Much."
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rikiislvr · 2 months ago
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unavailable - nishimura riki
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pairing: afab!reader x nishimura riki
summary: fresh out a relationship with a heavy heart, niki seeks comfort in his best friend, not knowing you were falling for him
warnings: cussing
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you had just finished showering, drying your hair off, you glance back at your phone, nope. no messages.
niki, your best friend since childhood, was on a date with his girlfriend, he was freaking out and telling you all the details until he suddenly just stopped, so you wondered what they were doing now.
you adored them together. whenever you saw them in the hallway giggling together or holding hands, you couldn’t help but feel so happy for your best friend that he found someone who makes him happy.
you check the time, 12 at midnight, you let out a long yawn and shut the lights, climbing in your bed and putting your phone aside.
before you could finally get the long awaited sleep you’ve been craving all day, your phone rang, you groan,
you grab your phone and answer it,
“hello?” you heard him, his voice shaky,
“niki? what’s up? how’d it goooo~” you say teasingly, but your smile quickly faded when you heard sniffs, was.. he crying?
“ki?” you say again,
“i’m.. outside.” he says, you quickly got up and ran down, quietly not to wake your parents.
you open the door softly, looking up, niki had his head down, tears streaming down his face and flowers that were drooped over in his hands. you couldn’t help but frown at his state.
“ki.” you walked up and pull him in a hug, which is took as a opportunity to cry in your shoulder, “cmon, my parents will wake up.” you pull away and step aside,
he steps in slowly and you close the door, going up to your room, he followed.
you close your bedroom door once you two were in, he sighed and threw the flowers in your trash bin, and sat on the edge of your bed.
you cross your arms, “what happened ki?” you say softly, “she uh..” he cleared his throat, “she ended things off..”
you felt your heart shatter, you knew how much he loved her. “my goodness.. why?” you sat beside him,
“i’m not what she was looking for anymore..” he shrugged, you furrowed your eyebrows.
not what she was looking for anymore? they’ve been dating for 5 months and she’s just now realizing it?
“that’s such bullshit. i’m sorry.” you sigh and rub his arm,
before you could open your mouth to say anything else, niki quickly lounged in your arms, sobbing softly into your shoulder, your heart broke.
you’ve seen and heard him cry before growing up but.. never like this. and it was killing you inside, because you only ever rooted for his happiness.
you rub his back, closing your eyes listening to his sobs, it was killing you but you knew he had to let it out somehow.
you decided to let him get more comfortable. “ki. cmon let’s get your in a more comfy state.” you tap his arm, he sniffed and pulled back, his face red with tears streaming down.
you frown and grabbed his hand and pulled him to your bathroom, you tuned in the light and looked up at him.
“i’m not gonna let you drive home like this.” you say, he didn’t reply, you grab a wet washcloth and wipe his face,
pushing back his hair to reveal his puffy red eyes, “i’m so sorry ki.” you sigh, he just blinked, you removed his jacket and pulled him back to your room.
“i’ll let you sleep in my bed, i’ll take the couch okay?” you tell him, on niki’s end, he wanted to protest, and he did.
“why?” he says low, “we’ve always slept together as kids.”
you chuckled, “i wasn’t sure if you wanted to be alone or not.” you shrug, he shook his head, “no.. not really. i can’t be alone with my thoughts right now.” he cleared his throat, you smiled softly and nod.
laying down, you lift your blanket for him to lay beside you, he slowly made his way over, laying down. you weren’t sure if you should comfort him or give him space.
you laid on your back, slowly blinking off, you were on the peak of sleep until you felt pressure on your arm, you look over, seeing niki laid his head there, sniffing softly.
you frowned, and wrapped your arm around him, pulling him to lay against you, “you’re gonna be okay, alright? we’ll get through this together.” you reassure him, he nodded and closed his eyes softly.
you waited for a bit, and until you heard his breathing slow a bit, you knew he was sleep, you smiled to yourself.
you were just glad you could be here for him when he needed a shoulder to cry on, it made you feel special. and with that, you closed your eyes next, falling asleep shortly after.
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a/n: debating if i should continue this or not, i lowkey want tooooo 😙
tl: @certified-ni-ki-lover @noblub-4ulolz @yourmyst4r @vixialuvs @ni-ki-ismyluv @judeduartewannabe @soobs-things @en-chantedtomeetyou @definitelynotherr @heyniki @wntersm @geniejunn @pkjay @baevsxii @k1ttylvr @geniejunn @pkjay @chaevibes @jiyeons-closet
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holylulusworld · 4 months ago
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Lumberjack Tales - The Hairy Bear (3)
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Summary: He ruins what you had...
Pairing: Lumberjack!Ari Levinson x fem!Reader
Warnings: angst, Ari being a douche for a moment, sad reader, unplanned pregnancy, pregnancy scare, mentions of being unemployed, money problems (implied), remorse, we love Bear
This story is part of my Lumberjack Tales masterlist
Catch up here: Lumberjack Tales - The Hairy Bear (2)
A/N: I added the first details of the following request to this part.
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Your days off flew by faster than you wanted. Ari and you spend every moment together, lots of cuddling and sex included.
Before you knew it, you called your boss to quit your job. Ari told you more than once that he wants you to stay – forever.
He seemed to be adamant about keeping you around. And you, well you, wouldn’t want to leave him, his cabin, and Bear for all the money in the world.
It was the first time in your life that you got the feeling you found your haven, a place where you belong, and are wanted.
“Ari,” you call for your lover and maybe future boyfriend. “Baby? Do you want to join me for a walk? We could take Bear too.”
Ari doesn’t answer. He came back from another grocery run half an hour ago. Ari didn’t say much. He simply carried all bags inside, and even ignored when Bear nuzzled his leg.
Assuming he had another encounter with the, in his words, annoying town folk, you snicker. Ari just hates having too many people around. You don’t know what happened, but he likes staying to himself – hence the cabin in the middle of nowhere.
A minute passes by, and another without a word from Ari. You sigh and decide to help him unpack the groceries. Winter is close, and Ari wants to restock his pantry.
“Ari?” You walk inside the kitchen, smirking as Ari is busy cleaning the counter. Last night you had sex on it, and you didn’t have the time to clean it yet. He huffs and snatches your panties from the ground to throw them into the trash can.
“Shit everywhere…” He mutters, still not looking at you. “Everywhere…”
“Can I help you?” You step closer to Ari, to hug him from behind and rest your head against his back. “We ruined it together. Let me lend you a hand.”
“Christ, can you leave me alone for five minutes?” He raises his voice, making you flinch. “It feels like you’re breathing down my neck all the time. Sometimes, a man needs time on his own. You’re suffocating me! Why are you so clingy all the time.”
You stiffen and immediately drop your arms. Stepping away from Ari, you feel like someone punched you in the guts. Not days ago, he told you again that he wanted you to stay forever, and now, Ari is telling you he hates having you around.
“Alright,” you try not to choke on the tears welling up in your eyes. “I’ll leave you to…cleaning.”
Ari huffs when you run out of the kitchen, and upstairs. He believes you’ll give him space and come back down later to join him for breakfast.
Bear whines as he looks at his owner. The Estrela Mountain Dog dips its head to watch its owner angrily scrub the kitchen counter. “Not now, Bear. I had a shitty day. My fucking ex-wife called, that blood-sucking bitch…”
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“Shoes, pants, wallet,” you sniffle while throwing all of your belongings into your backpack. You wipe your eyes and choke out a sob. How could you believe Ari wants more from you than sex? Of course, he’s already bored and wants you gone. “That’s all.”
Ari left the house to go for a walk with Bear some time ago. This way, you don’t have to say goodbye. You’ll just sneak out and find your way back to civilization and loneliness.
Grabbing your backpack, you sigh. For a few weeks, you believed you found a home. Now you know better. No man can be trusted. Especially not the kind looking like he came right out of a wet dream.
You slowly walk out of the room, not looking back. If you turn around, you’ll break down and cry. That’s the last thing Ari wants, a whiny and desperate woman clinging to him. Maybe he even believes after you quit your job for him that you are after his money.
Shaking your head, you decide to not think of him any longer. It was great while it lasted. You had a great time and awesome sex. You’ll remember your time with Ari for what it was – a late summer fling.
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“Y/N? Uh—I’m back. Listen,” Ari jogs upstairs to apologize for his earlier outburst. He was angry after hearing from his ex-wife after so long. The last thing he wanted was to yell at you. “Baby? I’m sorry for yelling. It’s just that…”
Ari stops in his tracks. He gasps when he finds the bedroom empty. “Y/N?” He rubs his scruffy chin. Something is wrong. All of your clothes are gone. Even the ones you carelessly dropped to the ground when you jumped at him to suck him off last night. “Baby?”
Bear trots inside the room. The huge dog whines loudly as you are nowhere to be found.
“Do you think she’s shopping?” Ari asks his dog. He furrows his brows as Bear lies down, and whines again. “Fuck…no…fuck!”
Sitting down on the bed, he buries his face in his hands. He screams your name, angrily stomping his feet. “I fucked up big time!”
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Ari aimlessly drives around the area. He searches his property, every inch of it. In town, no one saw you, and you’re not answering your phone.
“Bear, I don’t even know where she’s living,” Ari hits the brakes hard when he sees someone walking along the road. He cranes his neck, only to see the cashier from the store in town wave at him. “Not her.”
He slams his hands on the steering wheel, cursing himself for ruining the best thing ever happening to him. “She’s gone, and it’s all my fucking fault.”
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The first days back at your old place felt wrong—just wrong. You missed Ari's scent and his voice. You barely slept, not only because you felt like your heart got ripped out, but also because you found yourself in desperate need of a new job.
How foolish of you to quit your job for some guy you met not weeks ago.
“Fucking idiot,” you call yourself a needy and stupid bitch. “Only because his dick was good, you fucked up your career and will lose your apartment. Loser bitch. This is so typical of you.”
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Four weeks have passed, and you feel numb. Not only did you not get your job back, but you’ve got another problem, and your time with Ari left more than a bad taste in your mouth.
Hot tears run down your cheeks, realizing you took too many risks by giving in to the charming and sexy man. Again, you tell yourself that you should’ve known better.
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“Bear, come on,” Ari urges his dog. He finally found a trace of you. It took him almost six weeks to find out more about you, and your life. All he knew was your name. Nothing else was important while you were still around. Ari told himself, he could ask questions later and enjoy the blooming relationship you built. “We got to find her.”
Bear barks as Ari tugs at the dog leash. He sits down and whines loudly. “Stop making a fuss, you big beast. We have a job to do. Get up.”
The Estrela Mountain Dog remains where he’s seated. “What’s wrong with you?” Ari shakes his head. “We finally found her, and now you keep me from going to her?”
Ari huffs as his dog jumps up. Bear wags his tail and barks loudly. The dog suddenly starts running to chase after someone.
“Bear! Wait! Wait up!” Ari runs after his dog, dodging people here and there. “You stubborn beast. WAIT!”
Bear suddenly stops. Jumps at someone, making Ari yell his dog’s name louder.
“No! Stop attacking people. What are you doing?” His heart stops for a second watching Bear nuzzle your belly. The huge beast is whining for your attention as you carefully pat his head. “Bear, you beast found her!”
While you crouch down to wrap your arms around Bear, his owner steps closer. He watches you pat his dog while trying to find the words to apologize.
“There you are,” Ari huffs. “You must love watching me chase you.” He steps closer to grab Bear’s dog leash. “We will discuss your behavior on our way back.”
“What the fuck are you talking about?” You get back up to glare at Ari. “You wanted your freedom and silence back. I gave you what you wanted.”
You turn to leave, ignoring Bear whining louder. “I didn’t want you to leave. Y/N, I was having a bad day and yelled at you. I’m sorry.” Ari puts his hand on your shoulder, but you shake it off. “We could’ve talked things out, but you just ran. I needed weeks to find you. How could you just leave me?”
“How could you treat me like an intruder and a liability?” You snap at Ari. “All the time you told me to stay, and I believed you. I quit my job for you, only to get kicked out!”
“Y/N, I did not kick you out!” He growls. “You left! I came back and wanted to apologize, only to find you gone. I was scared to hell and back! Do you know how many nights I asked myself if you are still alive?”
You shrug. “You have a life to go back to, Ari. I suggest you enjoy your solitary, and I’ll take care of…” Biting your tongue, you look at the envelope in your hands. “Whatever.”
“Y/N,” he whispers your name when you are about to walk away. “Please. Let’s go somewhere else, and have a coffee. We can talk and fix this. It was all just a misunderstanding.”
Ari looks around the area, frowning as his eyes drift toward the building you left.
“There’s nothing to fix.” You want to walk away, but Bear blocks your path. “Bear, no!”
“A doctor?” Ari sucks in a breath. “Y/N. Baby, are you sick? Fuck.” Ari wraps his arms around you and buries his face in your neck. “How do you feel? What is wrong with you?”
You take a deep breath and say, “I’m pregnant…”
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Tags in reblog.
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laurfilijames · 7 months ago
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Breathe
Part 7
Pairing: Will 'Ironhead' Miller x female reader
Words: 6.9k
Warnings: Rated E, 18+. Swearing. Trauma/PTSD/nightmares/insomnia. Unprotected intercourse.
Summary: Unanswered questions amp up every emotion that time does nothing to lessen, and so much uncertainty raises the concern if everything will turn out okay or if moving on is the only answer.
A/N: Less hurt than the last chapter, I promise! Thank you to everyone who was so enthusiastic and responsive to it and made all that angst worth writing!
Photo by @avatarskingdom and edited by me. Please do not use without permission or credit. Headers by the wonderful @spaghettificationandpretzels!
Chapter Playlist
Part 1 Part 2 Part 3 Part 4 Part 5 Part 6
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---
You felt numb as much as you felt angry, scared and heartbroken.
It was all still so surreal, having to remind yourself constantly that Will broke up with you and was gone, the persistent sick feeling in your stomach growing with every thought of his life being at risk and that even though he was no longer yours, you might never see him again.
You did everything you could to understand his side of things, but with that your frustration increased wildly, the fact that he hadn't even given you the chance to be there for him stinging almost as much as him abandoning what you knew, or thought, you had.
Did he really believe you wouldn’t support him, that you didn’t care enough about him to give him space and time while he dealt with all the things he needed to, that your love for him simply wasn’t enough for him to want to hold onto while he was deployed, that everything you thought you had been building was broken and false?
The toaster popped, shooting your slice of bread out, making you jump after forgetting you were even waiting for it.
You ate because you had to, but food tasted bleak and flavourless, and everything that landed in your stomach felt like it sat there and made your nausea even worse.
You had made a whole lasagna earlier just because, giving you something to do for the better part of an hour, but the thought of eating it was so unappealing and you had the idea that maybe you would drop it off for Benny. Taking a bite out of the plain piece of toast, you thought how awful it might feel to go over to the Miller’s house right now, and decided against it, opting to freeze the lasagna for another time instead.
Another bite and the toast was in the trash, and you stood in the middle of your kitchen unmoving, not sure what to do with yourself next.
You hadn’t slept, and whether it was fatigue or just your grief pummeling you, you broke down and sobbed, your body shaking as the memory of Will holding you in his arms in this very spot flooded you, dancing one night while in the middle of cleaning up dinner, pausing almost anything in favour of stealing a piece of each other.
Work was a welcomed distraction, forcing you to go through the motions and function like everything was normal, able to allow you to bury your emotions for the course of a shift and nearly forget about what had happened, only to have it all come back the moment you got in your car and started your drive home, knowing you had nothing to look forward to.
You hadn’t been back to the gym since the day you saw both brothers there all beat up from their brawl with each other, your body too exhausted and weak to even consider working out, but as you sat at your kitchen table with nothing else to do, you went and changed into your gym clothes and drove over.
It was busy enough, observing the evening crowd enough to keep you entertained as you walked on the Stair Master, each step automatic and absent-minded.
Through a few people and machines you spotted Benny, resting on a bench between sets of chest presses, his smile and slightly awkward wave making you feel equally so, and as he stood and started weaving his way over to you, you felt bad that he probably felt obligated to talk to you.
You stopped the machine and stepped down, grabbing your things in the assumption you would probably feel like leaving after this conversation, your water bottle shaking in your hand that trembled with nerves and adrenaline.
“Hey,” Benny said, somewhat hesitantly.
“Hey, Benny,” you answered, smoothing your hand over your sweaty hair.
“How’re you doing?”
You sighed, looking down at the floor as you shook your head. “Do you want the fake answer or the honest one?”
Benny huffed a laugh in understanding. “You look like shit.”
You laughed out of disbelief, bringing yourself to look at him as he scratched his head and tried to recover.
“I mean- fuck.”
“No, I look like shit. Feel like it too,” you confirmed, reassuring his observations.
“Are you looking after yourself?” he asked, his face full of concern.
You shrugged, “As much as I can, I guess.”
He nodded, sympathetic to your feelings. “Are you eating? Sleeping?”
“Here and there. Not much of both if I’m honest.”
“Yeah, I get it. Just do your best even though it’s hard.”
You hummed. “Does it get any easier?”
He tilted his head a bit. “Does what get easier?”
“The worry, the waiting…”
“Oh, uh…” he pulled his ball cap up off his head, smoothed his hair back and placed it back on again, this time backwards. “Yeah, I guess we all just get used to it in a way. But I’d be lying if I said that everyday you’re half expecting to get that phone call…”
He saw the tears in your eyes well to the surface, and unlike most times, Benny felt a bit speechless.
“I can’t stop thinking about him,” you admitted, your words not even directed at Benny, but rather said aloud simply because you couldn’t keep them in.
“Ugh, I’m sorry,” you went on, wiping your eyes and shaking your head like it would suddenly shake away your feelings. “I’m gonna get going, see you later.”
“Yeah, of course,” Benny responded, his voice soft. “Hey,” he called after you, making you pause and turn half-way to face him.
“Just don’t give up on him yet.”
You gave a weak smile. “I couldn’t if I wanted to.”
You made it to your car before you really fell apart, the tears coming down your face so hot and fast you could barely see to unlock the door, and when you flopped down into the seat, you rested your head against the steering wheel and wept.
The most overwhelming sense of panic came over you, taking control over everything and trapping you in it, your mind racing with every horrible thought imaginable, and before you could realize, your breathing had turned short and gasping, your mouth desperately trying to suck in air between sobs.
Your hands wrapped around yourself, squeezing you tighter than the grip of the anxiety attack was, feeling your whole body shaking and trembling and all you wanted to do was scream.
That was when Will’s soothing voice popped in your head, urging you to focus on your breaths and count each one, the sound of the numbers in his even tone allowing you to stop the panic, and you began counting out loud until your breathing eventually leveled out.
How could the same person who was the reason you were feeling this way manage to help calm you, you thought, exhaling slowly as everything around you started to come into focus again.
You ran your hands over your face, your body still shaking with each inhalation though they had become more regular, knowing that as much as you were hurt and betrayed, you still loved Will more than you could imagine loving anything.
Benny’s phone rang not thirty seconds after he’d just hung up, Will’s number lighting up his screen suspiciously close to him ending his conversation with Tom.
He pressed the green button to answer it, and before he could even get out a ‘hey’, Will’s voice stopped him.
“Are you checking up on me?”
“Uhh-”
“I heard Redfly talking to you, idiot.”
Benny scratched his head, trying to gauge which way this was about to go.
“If you’re wondering how I am, just ask me, Ben.”
“Yeah, well, sometimes that’s easier said than done,” he quipped, recalling how many forced conversations they’d had lately where Will gave short, vague answers to everything.
“What the fuck does that mean?”
Benny sighed, lifting his arm up in exasperation before letting it fall and hit his side, “I dunno, man, I just thought I’d get a truthful answer out of Redfly over you. He’s with you every day and can tell how you are.”
He heard Will sigh, and Benny took the pause as a chance to give his brother the opportunity to tell him for himself.
“So, how are you, then?”
Will sighed heavily again. “I don’t fucking know anymore. Okay, I guess?” he said, his uncertainty clear.
“Tom said things are going well with the op, and despite it all you seem like you’ve got your head in the game.”
“Yeah, that’s all fine,” Will explained, like his role as a Captain on this tour was the least of his worries. “It’s everything else…”
“Yeah…” Benny agreed, holding space for Will to continue.
“How’s she doing? Have you seen her?”
“Saw her at the gym yesterday,” Benny said carefully, trying to decide if it would be better or worse to tell him she wasn’t doing well, but ultimately knowing if he wanted Will to be honest, he would have to be too. “She’s not doing good, man.”
Will was silent, making Benny pull the phone away from his ear to check if the call had dropped or not.
“I can’t believe I did this to her,” he said quietly.
“Yeah, well,” Benny said flatly, “What’s done is done, now you just have to focus on finishing this job and getting back home so you can fix it.”
“Do you think there will be anything left to fix?”
Benny blew the air out of his mouth slowly. “That’s up to you two. If you both want it to work out…”
“That’s what I’m worried about. By the time I get back she’ll have moved on and learned to hate me.”
“You don’t know that,” Benny countered. Able to tell the expression that would be on Will’s face right now, he continued. “She still loves you man.”
“I wish she didn’t. She deserves better, not this shit…”
Benny’s heart ached for his brother, hating that he was going through this on top of being back in action, praying his stress didn’t get the better of him or be the cause of any fatal mistakes.
“Listen, man, I gotta go,” Will spoke, his voice weak and quiet.
“Yeah, okay. Be careful out there.”
“Always.”
The beep of the call ending sounded in Benny’s ear before there was even the chance to consider saying anything else, and he hoped Will would hang onto the thought that maybe it wasn’t all lost yet.
Days turned into weeks, but the amount of time that was passing didn’t help to make things feel any better, making you wonder every day if it would ever stop hurting.
Anger grew as you wracked your brain combing through every detail of every conversation and act that could've led to this, wondering where it was that you went wrong, but you still couldn’t pinpoint the moment Will gave up on loving you or what it was that made him peel away. It almost hurt just as much as him being gone did, unable to know what the cause was so you could try to rectify it and simply get closure as to why it ended, your heart like an open wound that would never heal.
You looked at yourself in the mirror one last time before exiting your room, on your way to meet two of your girlfriends for a quiet drink, your attempts to refuse unaccepted.
You couldn’t deny that it would possibly help get your mind off of Will, but you knew it was futile as everything you did and everywhere you went, he was there.
“That guy can’t stop looking over here at you,” Grace said through a grin as she nudged you with her elbow, and you twisted in your chair slightly to follow her gaze.
You took a sip of your wine as you assessed the man with dark brown hair and brown eyes staring directly at you, his smile bright and clean, his lips plump and inviting.
You said nothing as you turned back to your friends, raising your eyebrows as if that was a response that would appease anyone.
“Come on, he’s gorgeous!” Nicole urged, tilting her head indignantly.
“I never said he wasn’t!” you defended, but in your head all you could think was how he wasn’t Will.
“You need a rebound fuck,” Grace suggested, and the thought made your stomach flip.
“I’m not ready for any of that yet,” you admitted, hoping they would understand how raw everything still felt.
“We know,” Nicole sympathized, giving your hand a squeeze as she placed hers overtop, and you knew they would support you in anything whether it was continuing to miss Will with every part of your being or hooking up with the next man who walked by.
“Oh shit, he’s coming over,” Grace blurted, adjusting in her seat as a wide smile appeared on her face.
Your heart plummeted in your gut, and you sighed, praying this wouldn’t be as horribly awkward as you were expecting it to be, trying to find the energy to be kind and cordial despite not wanting to.
“I hope I’m not interrupting,” a deep, smooth voice purred behind you, and you felt the demand of his presence as he stood beside your chair.
His eyes were even more alluring up close, and his crooked smirk was equally charming as it was sexy, the dark scruff around his mouth complimenting his olive complexion.
You swallowed, feeling unable to find words, and with a low chuckle, it prompted him to continue.
“I couldn’t help but want to come over to say hi and introduce myself.” He spoke with such confidence, his voice so seductive. “I’m Cam.”
He held out his hand for you to shake, and you did, feeling your hand tremble slightly before he took it in a firm grip and moved it up and down once on your behalf.
You introduced yourself as well as Nicole and Grace who you wanted to kick under the table for how they were gawking at him, but not as much as you wanted to crawl under it to hide away as he pulled out a chair from the empty table beside yours and took a seat.
“Can I get you ladies another round?”
“Oh, yes please!” the girls chimed, seeming completely enthusiastic about him joining you.
You assessed his hand for any ring as he waved the waitress over, requesting for the same drinks to be brought to the table, feeling relieved there was no band wrapped around his ring finger, but something about him still felt off to you.
He’s not Will, your mind reminded you, and you took a long drink of your wine to try to swallow the sour feeling stirring in your gut.
It was comfortable enough talking to him, even catching yourself laughing at some of the things he said and genuinely having a good time, but every time you felt yourself liking something about him, there was one thing you found you didn’t.
He’s not Will.
You found yourself lost in his chocolate eyes as he spoke to you, imagining instead they were clear blue and held a brightness that reflected the love you had learned to see shine through them, only to be reminded that that wasn’t something that existed for you anymore, and you blinked back to the reality you faced.
“Would it be too forward of me if I asked for your number?” Cam asked, his eyebrows raising on his forehead in a hopeful, but confident expression.
“Hm, yeah, sure,” you replied, picking his phone up from the table that he slid over to you and typed your number into a text message along with your name, sending it to yourself.
“I’ll call you,” he said, standing from his seat where he continued to smile at you.
Your eyes followed him as he walked over to the bar to pay his tab, feeling something stir in you as he looked back over his shoulder at you one last time before he sauntered out of the bar, everything about him charming and gorgeous.
But he wasn’t Will.
“Are you going to go out with him?” Nicole asked excitedly, the looks on both your friend’s faces confusing you like you missed something they hadn’t.
“Umm,” you pondered, trying to wrap your head around the situation, the three glasses of wine making your head feel fuzzy. “I- I don’t know.”
You felt like crying, feeling a sense of guilt and anxiety bubble up in you, like you were betraying Will and being unfaithful despite the reminder that he wasn’t yours slapping you in the face and twisting your heart in your chest.
A few days had passed since your night out with the girls, and as expected, a text from Cam had come through asking to take you for dinner, the invitation sitting ignored and unresponded to in your messages.
Every time you opened your phone to reply, you would see Will’s name a few spots down from Cam’s, the contrast between them and what was past and what was present making you wish more than ever that you could go back in time and try to mend whatever it was that took Will away from you.
You didn't recall ever being so irritable, your temper short and your patience gone, a toss up whether you would scream or cry at the drop of a hat becoming the daily gamble.
The gym didn’t even seem to allay these frustrations, and as you tried to adjust the height of the rack bracket and it got stuck, you felt that blanket of red creeping up through you.
Cursing under your breath, you wiggled the pin again and again, tugging and jostling it to try to get it to move, the clanking of the metal against metal drawing attention over to you by prying, judging eyes.
“Need help?”
You sighed with relief, hearing the familiar voice that belonged to Benny, closing your eyes and counting your breaths as he stepped in and adjusted it for you.
“Thank you,” you muttered, avoiding meeting his eyes as shame washed over you.
“You alright?”
You forced the air out of your lungs again, still not meeting his piercing gaze.
“I'm just so angry and there's nothing I can do about it,” you admitted, your tone defeated.
“I understand that,” Benny drawled, leaning against the squat rack.
You felt him studying you, almost as if he was debating saying something.
“He asks about you every time I talk to him…”
It felt like the wind was knocked right out of you, and somehow you managed to speak.
“He does?”
Your bewilderment seemed to confuse Benny, his face screwed up as he looked at you like it was the most obvious and normal thing.
“Yeah?”
You covered your face with your hands, letting out a growl that did nothing to signify your frustration at the situation.
“I still don’t know what I did wrong. He stopped staying the night and became more and more distant each time I saw him…” You paused briefly, trying to put your thoughts in order. “Then he just stopped altogether and the next time we spoke he ended it, and now you’re saying he asks about me?”
“He didn’t tell you about his nightmare?” Benny asked, his shock blatant.
You shook your head, your brows knitted tightly together. “No?”
Benny sighed and rolled his eyes, shifting on his feet as he crossed his arms over his chest. “Jesus Christ…okay,” he groaned, exasperated by his brother’s ability to consistently make things worse.
You stood there unmoving as Benny explained what had happened, going over all the details Will had told him of his nightmare and his reactions to it, and you felt cold despite having worked up a sweat from what you had done in your routine already.
“I told him he wouldn't actually hurt you but he was so messed up from it. I think it was days before he managed to sleep after that,” Benny said, his tone sad. “I've only seen him that distraught after a nightmare a couple times before.”
“Why wouldn’t he have said anything to me?” you asked, your voice a whisper.
Benny shrugged, “I think he was scared. And then knowing he was leaving on top of it…it was just too much for him.”
You nodded, rubbing your hands on your arms for some sort of comfort, feeling like your heart was breaking all over again, but this time for Will rather than because of him.
“I’m not making excuses for him,” Benny went on, leaning with his arms up on the barbell that hung across the rack. “I don’t agree with what he did, I just know how messy things can get in that head of his, and as his brother I kinda always have to have his back, but it doesn't mean I’m on his side.”
You nodded, at a loss for words as your mind tried to process everything.
It was a helpless feeling, having some sort of understanding now but unable to do anything about it, wondering if you should send Will a message or have Benny pass one along, but all you wanted to tell him was you loved him and that was probably something he didn’t need right now.
“Thanks for telling me,” you said softly, all of your anger replaced with sadness and worry, your heart aching in your chest.
Time continued to pass but did nothing to heal, each day marking another one gone without a word between you and Will, leaving you more unclear than ever at what to do, feeling that if he wanted anything to do with you, he would’ve reached out by now.
Not wanting to put Benny in the middle of it, you never once asked him to interfere or treated him as a messenger, only asking how his brother was doing when he hadn’t told you on his own and thankful that he usually would provide an update anyway knowing you were wondering.
The last time you saw the younger Miller you had dropped off a week’s worth of food, having prepped a variety of high fat and carb meals, helping to get him ready for his upcoming fights in a new weight class.
Cooking for Benny was just the type of distraction you needed, feeling useful and productive and able to put this latent energy into something good for someone else, offering to make his meals for him each week so he didn’t have to worry about his nutrition while focusing on his training.
He had told you as he helped unload all the food from your car that Will was due to return home soon, a matter of days or weeks but there was no exact date yet, and every time you went to the gym or to the grocery store, you braced yourself for a run-in with the man you couldn’t stop thinking about.
You finished washing your face and brushing your teeth, checking your phone one last time before leaving it on your dresser for the night, never getting used to the disappointment you felt at not seeing a sweet message from Will like you used to whenever he wasn’t with you, and still holding hope that whenever it did buzz with a text, it would be Benny saying Will was back.
Your anxiousness was getting the better of you, feeling like it was worsening each day to the point you were struggling to sleep even more than what had now become your normal, never resting for more than a couple of hours at a time if you were lucky.
So many things passed through your mind in those hours spent awake, some of which consisted of that outstanding offer for a date with Cam, not declining it yet despite knowing it was something you didn’t want anything to do with. Nicole and Grace would still bring it up whenever you talked but didn’t put any pressure on you, both of them knowing deep down you were happiest with Will, and you weren’t about to jeopardize any remaining chance with him until you knew for sure that there was an absolute finality to your relationship.
Not feeling tired but knowing you needed to try to sleep, you crawled into bed, nestling yourself under the covers on the side that Will used to occupy, closing your eyes in hopes your mind would drum up the memory of his arms wrapped around you.
You knew you shouldn't do it, knowing it wasn't helping you move on and that some might deem it unhealthy, but every time you laid in bed you imagined him with you and it was becoming the only thing that would get you to sleep.
It had been your haven; the warmth of his body and your limbs tired and wonderfully achy from sex providing all the comfort you needed to drift off, both of you usually able to sleep soundly with the exception of Will having the occasional nightmare until his mind plagued him with the one that he couldn’t get past.
How could it be so wrong to go back to a time when a version of you didn't haunt his dreams, when you had brought each other nothing but love and understanding and a sense of safety and security? You kept replaying what Benny had told you about his nightmare over and over, the sense of guilt you had over it working to torture you just as much as the dream tormented Will.
You sighed, squeezing your eyelids tight, doing everything in your power to recall the feel of his lips on your neck, his breath ghosting over your skin as he wished you goodnight, his beard scratching against you in the most addicting way as he tucked his face as close to yours as he could.
Tears started to spring from your eyes the harder you shut them, thinking how you would give it all up in a heartbeat so Will could be happy and live a life with all of his worries put at ease even if it meant you couldn’t be a part of it.
Will picked at the frayed laces on his boot as he listened to the dial tone, one leg bent to rest on his knee while waiting for Benny to pick up, excited to share the news that he was flying home tomorrow and to get an update on Benny’s training, knowing he had been working hard to put on the last few pounds needed to put him in the Light Heavyweight class.
“Sup, bro?” he finally answered, out of breath.
“Hey, Ben. You running?”
“Just in the middle of some light spars. Got my first fight tomorrow.”
“Tomorrow?”
“Yeah, buddy!” he hollered, his excitement palpable through the phone.
“That’s awesome, Benny,” Will praised, proud of his brother for reaching his goal.
“How’re you doing?” Benny panted.
“I’m okay,” he paused, planting his foot down so both were on the ground and scratching his head. “Coming in tomorrow.”
“Fuck, seriously?”
“Yeah…”
“Shit. The fight is in Fort Myers, I can’t pick you up, man.”
Will tried his best to disguise his disappointment, his leg bouncing as he tried to level his voice.
“It’s fine, I’ll take a cab or get Redfly to drop me off,” he suggested, knowing he wouldn’t even ask his friend since Tom would be so eager to be reunited with his girls.
Benny sighed, “You sure?”
“Yeah, it’s not a big deal. I’m just sorry I’ll miss that fight.”
“There will be more, don’t worry,” he assured. “Safe flight home, eh?”
“Thanks Benny. Good luck tomorrow. Knock ‘em dead.”
Benny chuckled, “Yeah, I will. See you soon, bro.”
Will ended the call and sat for a minute, the bit of excitement he felt about coming home diminished, feeling a sense of dejection that he officially had no one there for him.
He considered all of his options, the thought of reaching out to you even crossing his mind, but knew that he couldn’t and he would just have to settle for whatever warm welcome the cab driver wouldn’t provide him.
He blew air out of his mouth slowly, starting to feel like he couldn't capture a proper breath, closing his eyes as the sense of self-inflicted and well-deserved dread he was now accustomed to consumed him.
One, two, three…he counted, the numbers switching from the sound of his own voice to yours, repeating them with each breath in and out until he secured a consistent pattern.
Tomorrow.
You knew what it meant without any other context, the single word appearing on your screen from Benny making your heart jump into your throat, and you grabbed the edge of the countertop behind you with shaky hands as you leaned against it.
He had promised to tell you when he knew for sure and here it was, the day you had hoped for for so long, but one you were also terrified for.
Will was coming home.
As a slew of emotions ran through you, it dawned on you that his arrival happened to be on the same day as Benny’s fight, and you wondered if that meant anyone would be there to welcome him home.
You picked up your phone to reply to Benny, thinking of asking him who was planning to pick Will up from base, but as soon as you started typing the message, you hit the arrow to delete it, putting your phone back down on the counter.
It wasn’t your business, you told yourself, fighting every urge to make it yours, the thought of Wil returning home from the hells he faced with no one there for him breaking your heart.
You figured you were the last person he would want to see anyway, and knowing you had the potential to send him even more over the edge made you feel sick, thinking of how much had changed from when you were the one who used to bring him peace.
The flight was long, and it felt like every muscle in Will’s body ached as he walked off the plane and waited to board the bus that would bring them to the base station, feeling so close but still so far from being home.
There was continuous chatter around him, the excitement of all the soldiers about reuniting with their loved ones making Will feel happy and sad at the same time, and he did his best to seem enthused when asked if he was looking forward to going home.
He checked his phone more times than he needed to, having sent Benny a text that he had landed to which he responded with a thumbs up emoji, part of him hoping that there would be something from you, only to remember he didn’t deserve any grace for his actions.
He was getting everything he deserved, he thought as he pressed his head back against the headrest after sitting down, sighing out slowly while closing his eyes, finding it amusing that being alone was something he was both looking forward to and completely dreading.
It wasn’t long before the bus arrived at base, and Will remained in his seat until everyone else had gotten off, not wanting his fellow troops who were so eager to hold their loved ones to be held up by him who was only going to wait for a fucking cab.
He slung his bag over his shoulder and made his way through people hugging, a weak smile forming on his lips in seeing one of his friends holding his newborn baby, and not far off did he watch Tom embrace both of his daughter’s in his arms, picking them up and swinging them around until they were screaming with delight.
After making his way to the doors, he pulled out his phone and looked up the number for a taxi, rubbing his other hand over his tired eyes roughly, praying it wouldn’t take long for one to show up.
The area he stood in was quiet with everyone else still lingering behind, but he glanced up when he noticed a couple walking past hand-in-hand, pausing to steal a kiss.
Will was about to hit the number to dial for Taxi Tampa when he looked up again, his eyes landing on a familiar face and one he couldn’t forget even if he tried.
You had just walked in and were stopped in your tracks as you noticed him at the same time, your face a mix of so many emotions that Will could hardly pick one out.
You gave a small shrug and shook your head, silently explaining that you didn’t really know what you were doing there, and Will all but choked as he tried to take a breath, his shock in seeing you completely overwhelming.
He dropped his bag and let his phone fall on top of it, stepping toward you in purposeful strides, his eyes welling up just the same as yours were.
“I wasn’t sure if I should even come but…I had to show up for you,” you shook out, Will’s hands reaching to cup your face, his thumbs smoothing your cheeks as tears started to fall down them.
He nodded in response, unable to say anything, his own tears breaking their threshold as you grabbed onto his forearms, rubbing them through his shirt as he continued to hold onto you.
He pulled you into a hug, relieved when you embraced him just as hard, feeling himself relax into you, his face nuzzling your head.
“I’m sorry,” he cried, alternating his remorse with ‘thank you’ between pressing kisses onto your forehead and hair, your sobs making your body lurch against his.
Your hands pawed at his back, clawing at his fatigues like you were trying to hold onto him for good, and Will prayed with everything he had that you never would let go.
He wasn’t sure how long you stayed like that for, but he eventually felt himself calm down, relishing in holding you and being in your presence again, knowing he would do everything in his power to make every bit of hurt up to you.
Will inhaled deeply, letting it go slowly out of his mouth, feeling like he could finally breathe properly again after all this time.
It was surreal to be in his arms, his warm embrace something you missed more than you imagined you could have, the feel of his body on yours and his scent surrounding you so familiar.
His heartbeat thrummed in your ear as you continued to rest your face on his chest, hearing his breathing having evened out and realizing yours had done the same.
You reluctantly pulled away to look at him, still keeping your arms locked around his middle. “Should we get you home?”
Will’s mouth turned up on one side, his crooked smirk making you melt.
“Yeah,” he nodded, his hand falling to land on your lower back as you both turned to where his bag was left on the floor.
You expected a moment like this to feel awkward, but it was anything but, like you were learning each other all over again, standing in Will’s room with your arms around each other’s waist, your faces so close and your lips inches from touching.
Finally, Will leaned into you, softly pressing his lips on yours, making you hold your breath as you let your eyes close and kissed him back, a broken moan transferring into his mouth as you forced yourself to try to take in air again.
His hand ran across your back, pulling you close to him as he took a step into you, your shirt slipping up so his palm splayed out on your skin, that sensation alone making you shiver in addition to how good it felt to have his lips on yours again.
Kisses grew more intense as each second ticked by, only pausing when he lifted your shirt over your head, and despite feeling so desperate, you both continued to keep every touch slow and careful.
His fingers pinched the clasp of your bra together to release it, moving the straps down your shoulders until it fell from your body, returning his hands to your arms where he trailed his fingertips up them to your neck and then down to your bare chest.
You found the buttons on his shirt, blindly unfastening each one until you were able to peel it open, feeling his smooth chest and the defined muscles of his torso, his warmth radiating out onto you.
Will reached up to take hold of your face, angling your head to press his tongue deeper in your mouth, stealing every bit of air from you in the process.
Breathe, your mind begged, but kissing him was better than breathing.
The rough material of his fatigues brushed against your nipples, making your breath hitch in your throat even more, your body moving to rub against him again to replicate the feeling.
You were rid of your pants and underwear next, leaving you naked while Will remained in his uniform, but the intoxicating feel of your skin on his bare chest let him know that he needed to have as much skin-on-skin contact as possible, and he tore the garment off his upper body quickly before moving to his pants.
Once you were bared to each other, you returned to your slow caresses, touching and exploring with light fingers and hands, your pleasure brought on purely by love.
You stopped kissing him for a moment, teasing your lips on his until you managed to whisper, your voice thick with lust.
“I need you, Will. I need you inside me.”
His nose nudged your cheek as he agreed with the nod of his head, his hands clasping your face again like he feared if he went too long without kissing you, you would vanish.
He took your hand and led you to the bed, sitting down on it and shifted back slightly where you followed, straddling his lap and wrapping your arms around his neck, looking into his vibrantly blue eyes as he gazed at you lovingly.
His hands slid all along your back, bringing you closer to his body before they landed on your legs, guiding you to put them straight so they were behind him and you were seated flush against his lap.
You breathed out slowly as your forehead rested against his, feeling his cock settle at your folds, and when you moved your hips ever so slightly, you gasped at the sensation.
Will kissed along your jawline, his hands massaging your hips, ready to assist as you lifted yourself enough to reach between your bodies and take hold of his cock, guiding him to your entrance where you slowly sank onto his length.
Short, shuddered breaths were exchanged between you before you found each other’s lips again, and you gradually began to move together, finding a tempo that sang to you and helped display the love that had been missing.
Will held onto every part of you that he could, grasping at you as you rocked and rode him, his hips jutting up into yours in slow, meticulous thrusts to give you everything you needed, feeling your desperation grow while his did too.
Your clit rubbed against the coarse hairs above his cock, grinding until you were at the edge, the way your wet walls clenched around and encased him driving him to the brink what felt like faster than ever.
Even though you were both quick to arrive at your climaxes, nothing about it was rushed, savouring each movement to get there and not taking a single second for granted, every emotion felt transferred through your bodies.
Will kissed you hard, groaning into your mouth as he came undone, coating your walls and filling you completely with his hot cum that started to leak out of you as you continued to move on his shaft, your orgasm lagging just seconds behind.
Your fingers clawed at the back of his neck, scratching and digging into his flesh as your body took every bit of pleasure from him, the seal of your mouths breaking as you both panted for air, his head falling into the hollow of your neck while yours rested on the side of his, his hair soft on your cheek.
His mouth smeared wet across your collarbone as he moved his face, pressing sloppy, lazy kisses onto your skin as he continued to hold you close, feeling his chest and back expand and contract with each heavy breath while you kept your arms secured around him.
Will brought you with him as he laid down on his sheets, your bodies still connected, his fingertips tracing your hairline before he leaned toward you and kissed your lips again.
After a few more minutes of kissing, you tucked your face into his neck, your legs entwining with his, Will rolling over onto his back where he held your hand and brought it to rest on his chest.
A silent agreement seemed to settle between you to leave the talking until tomorrow, right now needing to simply be with each other, and like nothing had ever gone wrong, Will closed his eyes and fell asleep, his mind and body finding a peace he didn’t think he would ever have again.
---
Part 8
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Taglist:
@sotwk @dailydragon08 @sunnys-day @thedreadandthefugitivemind @glassgulls
@littlenosoul @glitterypirateduck @momia2910 @maggotzombie @rmwarn90
@paintlavillered @casa-boiardi @stealfromthedevil @kmc1989 @justreblogginfics
@spaghettificationandpretzels @whatever-lmaoo @steviebbboi @charethcutestory02
@christinhunnam @hp-hogwartsexpress
252 notes · View notes
nagaytoe · 5 months ago
Text
ULLAGONE
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Solivan Brugmansia X Reader
TWs/tags: Sol x reader, Crowe dies, murder, drugging, grief, mentions of guilt
@5herryx here it is! :D
Disclaimer: This is my first oneshot fully written in english (english isn't my native language) and published, if you guys have any advice feel free to tell me :D
This oneshot was inspired by @kierandayern post ( https://www.tumblr.com/kierandayern/762316734455791616/bad-end-pt1-you-cannot-decide-whether-or-not?source=share / check out their art, its amazing! :3)
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Word count: 1,869
Ullagone
(Noun) [irish] 'a cry of sorrow'
This was not how you expected your evening to go.
Just an hour ago you were eating dinner with your boyfriend, Jericho Ichabod. It was your first date as an official couple and you two decided to do something fancy.
Now his lifeless body is laying at your feet.
As you stare down at it in shock, you remain frozen in fear, not knowing whether running would help you in this situation or not, considering someone with a knife in his hand is blocking your way.
“I can finally have you all to myself…”
You recognize that voice but fail to place it due to the stressful situation you're currently in and the mask he is wearing, covering the lower half of his face. The figure in front of you is tall and clad in all black. The darkness of the alley certainly is no help in distinguishing his features.
The figure steps closer to you and over Crowe's body, like he wasn't a living and breathing human being mere minutes ago, but rather a pile of trash, blocking the attackers' way to you.
You instinctively back away, with each step he takes forward you take one back, leading to you being backed into a corner.
“[____], please, don't be afraid.” He's careful in his approach, almost as if you're a scared bunny he's trying to pick up and comfort. His right hand extends forward in a calming gesture as he keeps it low, his palm facing downwards.
“Stay away!” you croak out and up until now, you didn't even notice the tears streaming down your face. Since when were you crying?
“[____]...” he stops in his tracks, looking at you. What was he thinking about? The easiest way to knock you out? The most gruesome way to kill you? The best way to kidnap you? Now that you think about it, how did he even know your name?
“Why can't you see that I did it for you? That lowly scum… if you knew who his father is…” his voice turns from comforting to aggressive in the blink of an eye. He takes a deep breath before he continues, this time in a softer voice “I'm just trying to protect you…is that so wrong?”
You look up at him, a mix of emotions evident on your face: Sadness, Fear, Anger and now confusion as well. He can't be serious, can he? There's no way he truly thinks that there is nothing wrong with killing innocent people just for the sake of 'protection’ , not that you needed any protection from Crowe to begin with.
“I know you're confused, maybe even scared, but I have my reasons, you know?” he says as he steps closer.
“Don’t come any closer!” You yell and press yourself against the wall behind you in a feeble attempt to create more space between the two of you for the time being, causing him to stop in his tracks.
“Hey…I would never harm you…” The man in front of you almost sounds vulnerable, hurt even. In the back of the alley there is a dimly lit wall lamp, but it provides enough light to enable you to make out some of his features. His vermillion eyes stare intensely at you and long, black hair with green highlights peeks out from underneath his hood and frames his face…
Realization hits you like a train, your knees giving out underneath you as you slouch against the wall, hands moving up to cover your mouth in shock. Even more tears stream down your face now. How is Sol Crowe's murderer? This can't be real, Sol was always so nice and helpful, he would never harm and especially not kill another person without reason.
“Sol?” You sob, hoping immensely he won't feel addressed.
“[____]...” he whispers and hooks a finger under his mask, pulling it down and revealing the rest of his face. Safe to say, this was not the answer you were hoping for. You were hoping that this was someone who looks similar to him or maybe that this all is a bad dream or a really bad joke, but it wasn't. Sol's face looked back at you with his all too familiar warm smile.
You sink to the ground and cover your face with your hands, crying your eyes out.
Sol steps closer and crouches down in front of you.
“Please understand, I didn't do this with the intention of hurting your feelings, it's just…. I couldn't sit around any longer and watch him take what's mine” he gently puts his left hand on the side of your right calf, slowly stroking up and down in a comforting manner, smile still evident on his face.
You pull your legs closer to your chest in a weak attempt to shake him off, but to no avail - his hand keeps its position on your calf.
“Get away from me”, you manage to croak out in between sobs. Sol frowns at that, “I know you're scared but please believe me when I tell you that I would never harm you. Unless, of course, you leave me no other choice” he declares this as if it's the most normal thing in the world one could state, as if it doesn't make you freak out internally, especially since he killed a man mere minutes prior.
“Go away!” You yell at him, but he seems unfazed, “You know i won't do that, pumpkin”
You look at him, not knowing what to do. Your eyes are red and puffy, cheeks stained with tears and lips swollen, but despite the situation you two are in, Sol still looks at you with the same affectionate expression he always has. Up until now, you failed to notice it, maybe it wasn't even there before, but there was something dark, something possessive, gleaming in his eyes while looking at you like that.
You are not sure whether to run away or not, but staying here isn't really an option either. Gathering all your strength and courage you push Sol away with as much force as possible and quickly get up. You attempt to start running but don't get far as Sol twists around to grab your ankle, causing you to fall to the ground. It seems as though Sol wasn't exactly pushed to the ground, but rather caught off-guard and thrown off balance a little, unfortunately for you.
“Where do you think you're going?” He sounds irritated now.
You turn on your side and try kicking him with your other leg, but to no avail. Sol is quick to grab your other leg as well, now holding onto both of your ankles while you awkwardly lay on your side.
“[____]...” he says your name in a growling, almost threatening, way as you look at him with wide, scared eyes. Perhaps you actually are like a bunny in this situation, you sure feel like one at least. A bunny which has been caught in a trap and now has to fight for its life.
Sol pulls you closer to him and starts crawling on top of you, placing one of his legs atop of yours to restrain you from fleeing. You thrash underneath him but it's no use, his weight presses your legs down and he grabs ahold of your wrists, effectively pinning you underneath him.
“Don't make this harder than it has to be, [____]” ,Sol growls out, visibly agitated.
You cry bitterly, overwhelmed with the situation. You must be dreaming, there's no other way, no other explanation. Sol, your best friend Solivan, would never kill another human being.
“Why?” You cry out in between sobs, barely audible.
“Why? You're asking me why I killed that low-life?” he leans in closer, studying your face intently.
“He took something from me. The one good thing in my life was taken from me and claimed by someone else, someone who doesn't deserve an angel such as yourself. Don't worry though, pumpkin, he won't be a bother any longer.”
Sol nuzzles his head into the crook of your neck, muttering “Of course, if only you had chosen me over him right from the start it wouldn't have come this far… but it doesn't matter now anyways, it's just the two of us now, my dearest soulmate”
You can't seem to stop crying as you keep shaking your head. He was completely demented, Crowe is – was – an amazing person, a friend who always listened and comforted you whenever you needed it most and a loving boyfriend on top of that. He didn't deserve to die. Was it your fault? If only you hadn't been with him, if it wasn't for you he'd still be alive. Now his parents have to bury their son, his friends have to mourn the loss of their beloved friend, all because you were so utterly selfish. You had noticed Solivans interest in you, but chose to ignore it, you thought you were just imagining it, but it was as clear as day. Crowe was dead because of your negligence.
“Hey, no need to cry… I need you to calm down a little, alright? You're shaken up and freezing cold, we should get you home…”
Sol kisses away the tears running down your cheeks, causing you to move your head to the side. Sol frowns at that, moving both your wrists into his left hand and his right hand rising up to your left cheek, lovingly caressing it.
“Let me go…” you choke out amidst sobs, wiggling in his grasp, though this only causes the grip he has on your wrists to tighten.
“I love you. Do you understand that? I love you and won't ever leave you. I won't let you go, pumpkin, I'm here to protect you.”
Sol removes his hand from your cheek and reaches into his back pocket.
“If you refuse to acknowledge that then I will have to make you understand. But don't worry, we have more than enough time for that.”
He pulls out a small syringe, filled with some liquid. You struggle even more in his grasp, eyes blown wide.
“Sol, no no no, please, please don't do this. You… You're my best friend, please don't hurt me, Sol…” you cry out, scared to death. Will this kill you? At least it would be a painless death and you'd be reunited with your star-crossed lover yet again. Though something inside of you tells you that he won't release you from this situation any time in the near future.
Sol's face softens as he studies your scared face. “Shh, no need to be scared, pumpkin. All this will do is calm you down and make you sleep for some time. Remember, I won't cause you any harm, all you need to do is stay still”
He inserts the needle in the side of your neck and pushes down on the plunger, the contents of the syringe injected into your muscle. You grow dizzy rather quickly, your attempts at fighting growing weaker until they cease altogether and your body grows limp. The last thing you take note of is Sol kissing your forehead and whispering something incoherent before your world fades to black.
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moon7jay · 1 year ago
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Enhypen with a s/o who suffers from an ED (hyung line)
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Warnings : ed behaviours, body dysmorphia, low self esteem, self depreciation, suggestive in jay's, fluff, comfort, triggering content ahead, please proceed with caution<3
Requested by .・゜゜・ @onlyni-kis (I tried my best to make it realistic, I hope it helps you somehow)
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Heeseung
He'd be so attentive and accomodating to your needs. As someone with an Ed, you're often not taken seriously. Your mental problems are not considered valid. And so you usually avoid social settings where people can pass up unnecessary comments on your body or eating choices and heeseung never pressures you to get out if you don't want to. Because you lack confidence and even slight comments trigger you, heeseung makes sure that no one can do so while he's around. If he's around, you can freely go anywhere and do anything. He would have a reputation of a 0 tolerance boyfriend who did not like people perceiving you in anyway. So whenever he is around, people usually know to keep their words in check. He's your safe blanket. The only person you can be yourself with.
You were hanging out with heeseung's cousins in a family get together, sitting on heeseung's lap and indulging in oily food for once, trying to let go of the food guilt.
"y/n that's a lot of food for one sitting" one of them commented and even though the comment was harmless with no real intent to hurt you, it did hurt. Your appetite dying instantly as you gave them a sheepish smile ,standing up from heeseung's lap and excusing yourself from the setting, not wanting your useless tears to fall and ruin everyone's mood. Heeseung let you walk away to collect your emotions but the instant icy glare he shot towards his cousin was something his family would never forget.
"I thought I made it clear that when y/n comes over you better watch your fucking mouths" he gritted through clenched teeth, the nerve on his forehead throbbing with how much effort it was taking him to stop himself from punching his cousin's stupid face. He found you standing in the kitchen, the food that was previously on your plate was now in the trash can and you just stood there staring at it, your small sniffles reaching his ears. You jumped upon feeling two strong arms wrap around your waist but melted into heeseung's touch in an instant.
"Baby, it's okay, have you seen the amount of food that i eat? On the daily basis?" His words made you snort, how ladylike. It was true, heeseung always made sure to load his plate full, piling stuff to the top just so he could make you laugh and forget about your own portion size. It always worked.
"Let's get out of here and I'll take you to this new ice cream parlor I've been meaning to try, would you like that baby? Just me and you?" He peppered small kisses along the length of your neck tenderly, making you close your eyes and just bask in his love. "Yeah I'd love that" you whispered. He was enough for you. You could deal with anything as long as you were in his arms.
Jay
Watching yourself in the mirror was always daunting for you, having no idea of what you really looked like, just constant voices in your head chanting "ugly" were all you could focus on. The dress that you were trying on was tight, it was suffocating. Not thin enough, not pretty enough, starve, starve-
A choked sob escaped your lips and you covered your mouth instantly, realizing that you were in a public space and your boyfriend was right outside. Jay's thought made you cry more, all of your self doubts creeping in and you turned away from the mirror, unable to look at your distorted reflection any longer. You often questioned why he was with you, you were nothing but a mess of a person, not pretty, not normal... just a gaping wound was what you were. Always bleeding. A sudden knock at the changing room's door jolted you out of your thoughts and you quickly wiped your tears, breathing in through your nose to make your voice less wobbly "yes?" you asked, hoping it was just a staff.
"baby let me in please" came jay's sweet voice and you closed your eyes, a defeated sigh leaving your lips. He knew you were having a breakdown, of course he knew, he always knew. You trudged towards the door and yanked it open, presenting your tear stained face to your worried boyfriend. Jay took you in his arms in an instant, cooing and shushing you when you started sobbing in earnest. "talk to me love, I'm right here" he whispered, running his palms all over your body, caressing you with so much tenderness it made you tighten your hold around his neck.
"I just-i don't like this dress" you choked out in the crook of his neck and he hummed in understanding "but I think it looks stunning on you baby" He whispered. His words made you pull back, still sniffing but staring into his eyes to detect a lie being told to placate you.
"You do?" you asked softly, not trusting your voice just yet. He nodded and turned you around, a gasp leaving your lips while your back rested against his chest. Your eyes met his in the mirror and you shied away from the intensity of his gaze. You watched as he ran his hands all over your body, your breath hitching when he cupped your chest, travelling down to your waist, then to your hips "so perfect" he whispered in your ear, making a shiver run down your spine. "look at the way it hugs your curves sweetheart, and the vibrant blue which brings out the color of your eyes", your eyes widened upon realizing that he was right, the dress did do wonders in highlighting your eyes. " look at the way it hugs your hips baby, driving me crazy" and it did, it hugged your hips so snugly, the fit so perfect now that you were seeing yourself in new light. His fingers dug into your waist, his lips touching your earlobe while he told you how beautiful you were. "let me take you home and show you how much I like this dress" He groaned and you bit your lower lip at his suggestion, suddenly feeling so sexy and so desired. He was so good at making you feel like this gorgeous person that you never thought you were. But he was here. And he wanted you. He thought you were pretty and that's all that mattered to you. It didn't heal you but it did make things easier.
Jake
He would be the type of boyfriend who keeps you stacked with your diet soda and 0 calorie foods. After he started dating you he had quickly grasped the severity of your condition, and even though it was out of his hand to actually help you, he did try his best to just be there for you.
"Jake I didn't order these" you asked your boyfriend in confusion, pointing towards the two full boxes of konjac noodles sitting on the kitchen counter. He walked towards you with a smile and pulled you into him. "I did, aren't they your favorite noodles? I was just trying to be a good boyfriend".
Favorite noodles. No they weren't. And you knew that jake knew that, but he didn't like to make you feel like there was something wrong with you, and you appreciated that so much. Your lower lip wobbled upon seeing the new cans of coke zero stacked on the side counter as well. Never had anyone cared so much about your needs and it was making you choke on your emotions. You had been running out of your ed foods and were trying to push back buying them because of the increasing prices, not wanting to waste money on your own hunger because according to you, you didn't deserve to eat anyway.
"How'd you know?" you whispered through a sniffle, already feeling the onslaught of tears. "because I know you, and I love you" He whispered back, wiping your tears and capturing your lips in his own, kissing you through your breakdown.
Sunghoon
You didn't want to overthink it. You really didn't, but your boyfriend was gorgeous and so it was inevitable that he got female attention wherever he went. And most girls ignored your presence beside him, fawning over him as if he didn't have his fingers intertwined with yours. She was beautiful, the girl your boyfriend had been laughing with when you stepped into his office unannounced. That was your biggest mistake because now you couldn't help but compare. Compare the thighs, the arms, the waist... you were nothing like her. Were these the women sunghoon spent his entire day with? and he still chose to come back to your plain self? What were you even doing with yourself? You should be starving harder, you decided. Just a few inches more and your waist might start looking like her, and maybe a few more inches on your thighs would make everything better and the- you were spiralling again. Unable to stop it even though you knew the consequences.
"This is the 3rd order this week baby" sunghoon's voice made you turn towards your bedroom door, mentally cursing upon finding the packaged waist trainer in his hands. You panicked and snatched it from his hands, mumbling a quick thank you and not meeting his eyes. You could feel his probing gaze on you. "You haven't stepped outside of this house in weeks, care to tell me what's going on?"
You hadn't lost weight, you weren't pretty enough yet, didn't he understand?? You couldn't just go outside looking like this, was he out of his mind?. Warm hands cupping your cheeks pulled you out of your inner monologue and you looked up at his intense eyes staring down at you. He rubbed his thumbs onto your cheeks and rested his forehead against yours
"Do you remember the first day of high school? When you had the biggest zit on your nose?" He asked and you looked up at him confused, not knowing where this conversation was headed but nodded regardless. "I loved you then" he whispered and your throat tightened, remembering how he was probably the only one in your entire grade who didn't make a comment on your acne. "And the time when you fell face first into the muddy water before class cuz you were an idiot who never looked at the ground while walking" The memory made you giggle but sunghoon only smiled fondly , kissing your nose "you were drenched from head to toe but i loved you then. I loved you so much y/n". You could feel the moisture gathering in your eyes at his confession, knowing that you spent your entire teen years hating yourself so much to the point that you failed to see the love that was around you. Remembering how you would shy away from your own reflection in the class windows because you despised yourself to the core. "And I loved you when you slapped me, loved you so much that it hurt". Tears were falling freely now, the painful memory of you slapping sunghoon after he confessed his feelings for you because you thought he was trying to make fun of you, coming back to you. cuz in your head there was no way that a guy like him could ever want something to do with you, so you automatically concluded that it was a prank, a distasteful one. "and I love you right now y/n, I love you because you're you. I can't live without you because your soft snores are the only thing helping me fall asleep most days. Because your stupid jokes are the only ones I'd ever fake my laugh for- you gasped through your tears and slapped his chest lightly, making him chuckle. "I love you because I can't help it. It's that easy to love you. " he continued , wiping your tears, "don't you understand baby? You never had to try to make me love you, so why now?". You buried your face into his chest and sobbed, feeling like a huge rock had been lifted off of your chest. His assurance was what you craved the most. The reminder that you were enough for someone. For him.
"I want you just like you are sweetheart, flaws and scars intact. Raw and unfiltered. Now that I have you in my arms, please don't take that away from me" He whispered, wrapping his hands tightly around your heaving body.
"If it's hard for you to love yourself,please let me do it for you" and just like that, he was again fixing the parts of you that he didn't break.
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moonbeamsandmayhem · 8 months ago
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a/n: Eddie x fem!Reader. It’s been a while. Thank you all so much for bearing with me. This is a purely self-indulgent blurb/fic. Not beta read. Inspired after author watched Ghostbusters: Frozen Empire.
warnings: oral, penetration, dom/sub undertones if you squint, edging, reader with a vagina, Eddie being a little shit. I think that’s it! As always, please DM me if I missed anything.
October 31st, 1996 - 10:25pm
The candy had been eaten, scares given, and costumes put away for another year. You had gladly been on candy duty for a majority of the evening at the community centre, giving out treats, facilitating games for the little ones, and telling ghost stories to enraptured ten year olds who hung off your every word.
As for Eddie, he was running a DnD one-shot for the teens down the hallway. Occasionally you could hear raucous laughter and some profanities spew from the din. It brought a smile to your face knowing that he could still command a room like he had not-so-many years ago at Hawkins High.
But now, you’re home. In your shared apartment. Your legs are on his lap, while you balance a bowl of popcorn on yours. Your eyes are glued to the screen, watching as Dana Barrett and Louis Tully embrace, kissing passionately, the Keymaster and the Gatekeeper reunited at long last.
Your periphery catches movement as Eddie’s hand reaches for the popcorn before landing squarely (purposefully) on your thigh. You rip your attention from the TV to lift a curious brow at him, only to be met with a smirk. “Something on your mind, handsome?”
He croons, smirk growing to a full blown smile. “A few things, yeah,” Eddie admits, hand inching a little higher, “just thinkin’ about how killer you’d look in that dress.” He nods back to the screen, referring to the gown Dana’s wearing.
“You think I can pull that off?” You scoff.
“Sweetheart, you can pull off a god damn trash bag.”
“I’m not Sigourney Weaver, Eddie.”
“She’s got nothing on you.” He tugs the bowl from out of your grasp, placing it on the coffee table before giving you his full attention. Leaning over, he cages you in, forcing you full on your back against the couch. Eddie’s lips brush against yours, silently asking for permission, with a small peck against his, he surges against you like a man trying to quench his thirst. His hands are everywhere, as are yours, a whirlwind of disregarded clothes find themselves unceremoniously on the floor, but you’re both too distracted to care.
“You looked so hot in that witch’s outfit, babe. Was hard to keep it together tonight.” He latches on to the space where shoulder meets neck, sucking in a bruise.
“Y-you looked pretty hand - fuck - handsome yourself. The eyeliner, the fake-fangs, like something out of The Lost Boys, Christ, Ed’s.”
“Mhm. You like a bad boy, don’t ya, sweets?” Lathing the spot with the flat of his tongue. You shudder, eyes rolling back a little, losing yourself - did he say something? He nips at your skin and you gasp. “I asked you a question.”
“Could - could you repeat the - ah - shit - you’re distracting me, Munson.” You pout.
“Am I?” He looks at you with those big brown eyes, all faux-innocence and one-hundred percent mischief. “My bad.”
“Asshole.”
Eddie chuckles softly, “Guilty as charged. Now, are you gonna let me continue being a distraction or…?”
There’s a pregnant pause.
“Yes.”
You cum three times. First, on his tongue. And he makes you work for it, pay back for calling him an asshole. He lifts you higher and higher then pulls his affections away, leaving fluttery kisses around your clit before he starts again. He does this four times until you’re nearly sobbing. It’s a rather messy affair when he finally lets you cum, snapping like a taut wire, and gushing all over him.
Still dazed and trembling from the power of your orgasm, he pulls a second with practiced fingers. Playing you like he plays his guitar, making you sing into the howling night. You’re begging for his cock now, begging to cream all over it, but he shushes you as he works in a fourth digit. You arch your back clear off the couch like a woman possessed, you cum harder than you have in your life.
Or so you thought.
When Eddie eases into you, it’s the closest thing to heaven you can imagine. He stretches you and fills you just right, the piercing on the tip of his cock finding that spot only he knows how to he reach. He presses his forehead to yours, muttering to keep your eyes on him. And you do, because how could you possibly look away? Not only does he fuck you like tonight is the last night on Earth, he makes love to you as if you’re the only two people left on the planet. Slow, self-assured, comforting, everything else dissolves around you. You cum so hard you see stars. Your lungs burn, robbed of air, as you clench and cream and gush. He empties into you with such a guttural groan of relief at the exact same moment, sweat beading his beautiful brow. He pumps, once, twice, a third time, then lays on top of you, satiated, dipping his head a little to nuzzle his nose against yours.
“You absolute menace.” You tease, with an exhausted smile, leaning forward to capture his lips.
“What can I say? Bustin’ makes me feel good, baby.”
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