#so. i mean. you can't blame me.
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My most fleshed out group of clans was inspired by my favorite area to walk in at my old college. I literally drew clan borders on satellite images from Google maps.
guys will see a location and think wow thats a great place for a clan of warrior cats
#in my defense - it actually was the perfect location for a set of four clans#it was a line of four incredibly distinct habitats:#a dense forest with lots of logs and fallen trees and plenty of brush and brambles#the school compost piles which may or may not have been illegally maintained#(they would just throw the carcasses of dead livestock onto the piles. the place was covered with carcasses and bones)#a section of open fields and crop fields with a small triangle of forest behind it#and a large section of very open forest very few hiding places.#a fairly short walk away (for a human) is a large pond that is usually very reflective#(which would be a perfect 'moonpool' type of location - there also were some big koi that lived there)#near to that was an old meeting spot with a wall decorated with colorful stones and etchings-#and an area of cobblestone in front of it and a stream that flowed by it and was a perfect place for clan meetings#situated behind two of the clans is a large grassy field with absolutely no cover which has a unique purpose for the clans#the open forest clan borders a fairly busy road and there is a pavilion with a picnic table between the forest and the road in one spot#and on the other side of the road is a significant area of forest that tends to be very dark and shaded.#so. i mean. you can't blame me.#the area lends itself absolutely perfectly for a group of clans with different adaptations and cultures.
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do you also hate the fact that there are so many people standing there and the only person bam called out for was khun?
and khun's 'why were you not answering me? do you even know how worried i was?'
then endorsi herself pointing out that they forget about everybody else when they're talking to each other.
this arc keeps on feeding me.
#lari reads tog#tower of god#tog#season 2#episode 255#khunbam#the 25th bam#jue viole grace#khun aguero agnis#endorsi jahad#iykyk#yes i caved#yes i'm reading the webtoon#and yes i already passed half of the second season#YOU CAN'T BLAME ME OKAY#I COULDN'T WAIT FOR THE ANIME#I WOULD DIE#so i started reading it#and just to be clear#when i say i hate it#i mean i actually love it#it's soulmatism with them
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To me personally, R*ck could've done more for Percy's and Nico's relationship better than just the "You're not my type." Not only because it just felt like a rush fill-in for closure and not even being true, and the irrepetible damage it did to the fandom who wore the line out among many other things, but also because it felt so lackluster (but many things in HOO felt that way). Like R*ck could've done so much more with these two and their history rather than just brushing it off with this dumb line and Percy being confused in the end like he had any control over the situation. R*chard, I'm in your walls!
#percy jackson#nico di angelo#pjo#rr crit#pjo critical#bc there are also still people who put blame of nico's crush on percy even tho it's not even his fault & i feel like rick could've given#better closur but just fed into it#like you mean to tell me (if percy found out what happened with cupid) he wouldn't try to comfort nico even if awkwardly?#you mean the two of them don't at least bond over tartarus? not even a conservative?#tho it's been a minute since I've read hoo (im still on pjo) so if i miss anything pls correct ne#*me#and pls if u want to debate at least keep it respectful#i also feel like this unresolve has some fans of both characters making them ooc for some reason#like some nico fans still placing unconscious blame on percy especially for things he can't control and making nico seem overly bitter#while some percy fans do ignore how certain things about nico that percy could've handled better amongst other things#like there are LAYERS to these two besides some run away line and nothing else#come on richard 😒
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dandadan fills the well-written-female-characters shaped hole in my heart.
#*head scratch* well#i mean i had to say it#you can't blame me you know where i came from#but i mean even with all the other shows i casually tune into. dandadan stands out a lot 😭#this also helps the (equally well-written) dynamics between female characters!#it's so surprisingly refreshing considering it's an action shounen#but ahhhhh i'm not even close to catching up with the latest manga release and man...even with acro-silky and turbo granny's backstory aside#it's so lovely to see how well the female characters are written outside of major plot-progression events#i'm so excited to keep reading you have no idea like.#AND THE ROMANCE????? THE ROMANCE!!!!!! oh my god.#i've heard about the intensive research that went into writing it and IT WAS WORTH IT WOW#DORKS IN LOVE#dandadan#i feel like a starved dog fed well for the first time in a long while.
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reminding myself that Nurm is actually just a cluster of cubes and not this silly goober I imagined 😖😖


#He looks so much warmer 😞#mcsm#minecraft story mode#mcsm nurm#nurm mcsm#mcsm fanart#Lemme just say I was fighting for my LIFE drawing him accurately#I can't do cubes y'all#Also I'm convinced the colours are wrong no way is he that cold and dead looking#Blaming the render I colour picked from 🫵#What do you mean my design isn't cannon aha yeah it is that's Nurm#He told me himself guys trust me 🤞#By the way I just wanna tell y'all#I love rambling in hashtags so much#Why isn't this a big thing on other social medias I'm on#On tiktok we don't even get spaces!!! No spaces#I have to tag stuff like “mcsmnurm”#???#That's so impractical#Born to be a yapper forced to use tiktok
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watched wind breaker, found a ship to obsess over, then checked tumblr to see if it exists and thank goodness it does

(that being said i hope i don't end up liking another ship more than this along the way because i am Tired of being in rare pair hell in every single fandom)
#wind breaker#togasaku#kamesaku#sakura haruka#togame jo#i mean i Know it's the most obvious ship to see there and my post is probably ridiculous to read#but i've been in MASHLE and the most obvious ships there weren't even popular it was Insane#so you can't blame me for worrying ok (」°—°)」
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#Fangs of Fortune#大梦归离#Bai Ze Ling#Fangs of Fortune bts#cdrama#Tian Jia Rui#Cheng Xiao#Yan An#ab-FoF-mine#ab-TJR-mine#douyin#20240628#my notes for keeping track of all these videos say things like '2 idiots dancing' '3 idiots dancing' '3 other idiots dancing'#but i mean look at them#can you blame me?#it is so cute though#I said for a long time that Zhang Linghe can't sing but now he can#so maybe Tian Jiarui will learn to dance
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im bored and i don't wanna sleep yet but i can't seem to write today so i'm just gonna start rambling a little bit about my felix + turbo (i say it like this bc it's not inherently romantic the point is moreso that they're close in some shape or form) fic i'm writing bc as awkward as i feel about it i just think i'd feel weirder dropping it completely out of nowhere whenever i do finish it sooo
rambling go !!
it's essentially about that one headcanon where they exchange awards bc i love that hc c: the entire fic is gonna be made up of 5 different scenes - the first two are showcasing how the initial trade-off came to be , the next two are about them reminiscing about each other , and the last one is after all the sugar rush stuff happens
i don't really wanna give toooo much away mostly bc i am a very secretive person and i like being weird and vague about the stuff i'm working on bbbuuuuuttt i am veeeerrrrrrryyyt close to being finished . i think . pretty sure ? ive been working on this for almost a month already and i pretty much have the first three sections done with constant editing and small changes here and there , im currently finishing up the fourth , and i need to start working on the fifth ... which the latter is gonna be tough bc ... im not even entirely sure how it's supposed to play out yet ive kinda been putting it off entirely until i had everything else written since it depends a lot on what happens before then so im still trying to figure out what exactly im trying to get out of the scene .:. i'll get there eventually tho no idea when
oh yeah btw . i hope you like angst . bc i LOVE the stuff and there is a loooooot of it . like 8k+ words of it hEhEheHeGe ok like tEchNiCallY the first 3k or so are mostly fluff the first 2 parts are kinda sweet i think but there is an overhanging feeling of dread for the pain that is to come ... c:<
ig that's enough rambling about the premise for now , although i'll share just a few out of context authors notes unfortunately i don't have very many bc i was way too worried with how everything was turning out so most of it was like 70% worrying and 30% plotting
'what actually is on felix’s medal like … is it a number one … or his name … or a hammer … why is it both the latter in the movie … that doesn't make any sense … i can work with any of these i just need to know which one it actually is …IM ORETTY SURE ITS BOTH ugh im going to scream … ok i think like on the screen it's his name but in the actual game it's a hammer .. ? kill me what the fuck do i go with ' (decided to go with the name bc i had more to work with)
'one of the nicelanders is like ‘you have a visitor’ and he's like ‘wow already .. ?’ and there's like only one person he can think of that that's fast . SONIC SPEE- no '
'to roadblasters or not to roadblasters … that is the question ..'
'he can get a little overwhelmed by emotions right as a treat ?'
'ppffftttt i was just thinking random thoughts and my silly brain thought of that one thing that's like 'annoying gay couple + annoyed lesbian' with fucking hammertastic and gene pppfpfffftttt that's so stupid lmao'
'feel like this is kinda sweet ... this looks like a good spot for my roller skate and my marbles ... it's just such a shame i'm going to RIP IT ALL AWAY HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA i love angst <333 you gotta have some lovely happy moments to maximise the pain'
'... i do not know a fucking thing about clothes is what kc's wearing under his tailcoat a waistcoat or am i stupid ... is it a normal shirt idk ... is that immersion ruining if i just keep it im going to die' (didn't end up using it)
'i really love it when my brain gets excited and goes hehhehehehehahahahahahHhdeHgff do EEEEAAAAA i don't know if i can utilise this power properly tho :C i can try tho … hey looks like the worrying is back on yayyyy (boooo)'
'fuck it we ball we go into the liiiIIIIII'
there is also a whole bunch of evil laughter in the notes and i noticed i use a LOT of italics especially when it's from turbo and especially especially during king candy's section lmao ... he just feels the need to be very expressive and emphasise the way he says and thinks things lol
yknow what just for fun - and bc i have no idea where else to put this - i did once have a very . interesting . bunch of authors notes i wrote a few years ago for something else but i never ended up writing it . it makes absolutely no sense at all and it's completely out of context so hopefully it's still kinda funny
'pictures of giirrrllss are noooot for meeee you seeee
she be down in hollywood (that's not the words) (idc)
ur actually insane yeah thanks i know
WE GET GIRLS !!! WE ARE CUTE !!! WE ARE COOL !!
dom
i eat sand
shut up
metroman finally starts falling for megamind but oopsies poopsies it's too late he's already fallen for the hot reporter roxanne (what the fuck why did you make this comparison) (also that just sounds like a normal megamind fic)'
i would draft similarly to ^that in school too with my boring essays and once i accidentally submitted one of those drafts and i got sent to the counsellors office for 'concerning behaviour' lmao
anyways i might maybe perhaps ramble some more and let loose some more details perhaps maybe another time dunno uhh but i think that's enough for now ... bonus rambling in the tags
#wreck it ralph#hammertastic#80s boyfriends#i think one of the hardest parts of writing is getting so used to your work you can't tell what's good anymore#like ... when i came up with a few lines i was like AAUUUGGHHH IM SO EVILLL but since i'm so used to it now i can't tell#it's just kinda sad you can't seem to enjoy your own work as much bc you know all the entire process of making it#or at least that's how i feel idk#my brain has also been very inconsistent with how much progress i can make each day#like sometimes i get a total brain blast and get like 2k done#and others i can't seem to do much at all it's been kinda like this every other day and it makes me scream#but ig that's just how it goes#oh yeah i think im also most nervous about my characterisations and dialogue#i mean i thiiink ? it's ok ? but there's some parts im not really entirely happy with but i mean#there's always gonna be stuff you're not entirely happy with#but you gotta settle with some things soemtimes otherwise you'll never be done#i have gotten less nervous more recently but there's yknow always anxieties lol#on a more positive note i think my favourite part so far is definitely kc's section i mean can ya blame me hes so interesting funny guy#i'm really sorry about all that#if i think of more interesting things i wanna share maybe i might idk im kinda fickle and tight-lipped about what and how much i share
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If you were to look into my mind, you would probably see 2 goat-like things having a fight over something that doesn't matter with Starman just sitting in the background and playing with something.
#foxok vents#not in a plural way (I think). characterizing (is that the word?) my thoughts with contradicting opinions just makes it easier#to express myself and such... those guys are all still me.#Could these guys shut up... this random thing does not matter.#bro you don't even like this stuff who cares if someone wrote somewhere that you are a bad person or deserve to die if you do like [thing].#this is not about you my guy... even if you did like this stuff this wasn't directed at you specifically so who cares...#that person doesn't know me. People tend to like me. So shut up.#stop trying to find prove that I'm bad...#That does have a function#so I can't blame it. Like- if you did like [thing] people would hate you and try to make your life worse. This seeks to prevent that.#It does it's job.#Still does it have to react to something that doesn't concern me? Or I mean... I guess it could... So maybe it's good actually.#Still makes me feel bad...
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Drew some of THE BESTEST oml I watched this yesterday with my brother and it was ABSOLUTELY AMAZING!
The Amazing Digital Circus is all that's on my head right now.
It's the only thing motivating me to draw currently so imma just forget my responsibilities and hyperfixate over this forever. <:)
#the amazing digital circus#tadc pomni#pomni#fanart#digital art#THE PLOT IS AMAZING#I've never felt so invigorated IN MY LIFE since i started my Undertale AU hyperfixation#also#yes#I'M A JAX SIMP#you haven't seen the beginning of it people#0_0#But i mean you can't really blame me can you 🤭#anywhooooo#its been a long day im going to bed
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Hmm I apologize again for the rant !
It is not the first time I am doing it. I might forgot to put "please don't tag it as ship" under my drawing of tighnari cyno. Please, do not !
I love them as best friend, I love them as brother/found family, I don't mind the queerplatonic relationship at all
But their romantic side make me pretty uncomfortable. No hate ! It is my own taste.
Shippers are always welcomed and I am so glad you like my content 💕 but all my art concerning them (unless I tag the ship) are purely platonic. I just ask for some respect of my taste and not reblog my art with the ship tag.
I don't want to block, because I am genuinely glad you enjoy my work and as a young artist, it means a lot for me. Thank you so much 🙇 !! But as a human, I can't deny how uneasy it makes me feel.
Thank you for understanding !
#rant#I blame nobody#i am clearly not used to block ): I should tho but I know those who tag ship are not mean at all </3#it is fine if you don't know.#but i saw people reblogging my art with shiptag even if i said “do not”#my art is like my only safe place please respect it#this ship is so popular and I clearly stop to interact with the fandom because of that#i clearly ignore when I saw one in my timeline /dashboard becausz I can't do nothinf against it except masking the account#but I beg you. not. under. my. post.#not in my DM#why i feel obligated to justify myself 😭#but yeah !!! the ship is valid and full of greenflag !! wholesome !!#but I only enjoy them platonically !!! please respect 😭😭😭 I SWEAR I AM DESESPERATE WHY IT IS SO HARD FOR SOME TO RESPECT THAT OMG#gosh on twitter someone said me “ignore ??? what did you expect ??? it is the most popular ship”#I AM TRYING I AM LITERALLY NOT SEARCHING FOR FANART 😀#feeding myself with my own food#that's why I am so grateful for people who support me. thank you. 😭#and how could I ignore a comment under my post ??? interaction are so important for me I read everything#ANYWAY SORRY FOR RANTING !!! IT IS CLEARLY A /NOTMEAN POST !!!#next time I won't forgrt “do not tag it as ship”#but urgh if I do this I have to do in every post ???? 🤨#and what if I draw tighnari cyno kaveh but I don't mind ship with kaveh ??? 🤨🤨🤨 (plz still don't)#tHERE IS PLENTY OF CYN0N4RI ACCOUNT IF YOU WISH TO SEE MORE CONTENT OF THEM !! Please support them <<3 mine are platonic !#but clearly. imagine you are obsessive about two characters <<3#but their popular ship is the one who make you the most uncomfy 😀#so you decided to just stop looking at fanart and not bothering anyone 👍👍#but it came under your post and your DM 😟#AAA SORRY I AM SALTY I SWEAR I AM NOT USED TO FEEL LIKE THIS ):<#anyway plz take care ilove you mwah 🥺🥺🥺🥺💕💕
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I occasionally wish to reach out to old friends/acquaintances I haven't spoken to since high school/some other even earlier time in my life, but I have SOOO little social energy even for required tasks (like making dr phone calls or etc), I never have any leftover for extra ones, and it would be very odd to message someone I haven't spoken to in like 5 years out of the blue but then take 4 entire months to respond back lol.. My natural curiosity with nostalgia/collecting details of the past/etc. (literally if I were born a little earlier I would definitely do scrapbooking or something lol) is very strong, but, alas, not strong enough to beat out the Social Issues Demons apparently
#facebook always does that 'here's a post from this day 8 years ago' thing. and I see old comments interacting#with people and it's so like.. OOOOO~~ where are they now?? what's going on? how much have they changed as people?#how much are they the same? this is fascinating. i should contact them!!' but then it's like... take that to it's logical conclusion though#you would contact them and then IF they even responded it would take you 80 years to respond and then they would#think there was something wrong or that you were trying to be insulting or something. To contact anyone I need to include an 85 page#disclaimer of all of my social issues & mental illness things. 'If i take 3 weeks to reply I promise it has nothing to do with u' etc lol#THIS is why more people need to be into phone calls/voice calls/some form of audio real time communication/etc.#I think one of the main things that's hard about messaging through text for me is it's so unscheduled and open ended#(plus it takes forever if you're talking about anything in detail and gets very long very quickly)#because like you can send a message and then just get a reply whenever. and then you're expected to reply back whenever#so it's like you never know when the response will come or when a new obligation to reply can come up? so it's like this sudden thing with#no outline?? if that makes sense. whereas a phone call is very like 'hello let's schedule a call from 10am - 2pm on thursday'. And you know#EXACTLY when the interaction will start and EXACTLY when it will end and you can plan around it in your schedule easily.#I have the reverse thing of a lot of people (how people don't pick up phone calls/hate calls/only text)#I would literally talk on the phone with a stranger. I would have a discord voice chat with someone I barely know.#if someone I hardly even remember from elementary school asked to have a voice call with me out of nowhere I would do it.#but if a stranger MESSAGED me?? or someone I barely know sent me a TEXT or something?? I will never reply probably#It's just too vague and weird. and you can't read voice tone over text. and the interaction could last forever with no clear end#point and etc. etc. But a call is like. set. established. clear boundaries. you can read the flow of conversation better. rapport. etc. etc#I get that I guess people feel more anonymous or distanced over text?? but you can have fake phone numbers on the computer. or do like disc#rd calls. or zoom without a camera or etc. etc. Also the distance that's present in text is BAD distance because it just means that tone is#not conveyed properly and you will never truly get a sense of the person's conversational vibe or mannerisms or how well you really click.#ANYWAY ghgjh...... I'm so so so interested in concepts of like.. How did that one kid I used to talk to in elementary school#but then they moved away in 5th grade - how did they end up? what are they doing now?? etc. etc. Like despite the severe social anhedonia#and general lack of connection with others I'm just really fascinated in like.. idk. the human development of it all and like#the concept of how we're actually a million different people through the course of our lives ever evolving in different iterations and etc.#PLUS again. i love nostalgia. sometimes old peple you know might remember a shared memory or can tell you about something you forgot#or etc. like it's SUCH A COOL THING in CONCEPT but I am too socially inept generally speaking lol. which people I still talk to today are#familiar with my 'phone call once every few months' communication style. but strangers would just be like... wtf. And I don't blame them#Sure I literally cannot change the physical health + brain issues i have - but also I know enough to not put others through that lol
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"woah i can't believe you've read blue sky!"
hoho. my dear followers. i have done more than read it. do you have any idea what you are dealing with.

#portal#blue sky#not art#there are two fanfic authors works i would want printed. waffles is one and i did it.#these are levels of tism you cannot even BEGIN to fathom. this book was my Personality in high school.#i mean so was portal in general but 9 years later and I've still not read a better fanfic#i've read some banger fics but blue sky remains its own level#this thing is like two inches thick. it has art in it. its beautiful. i could kill someone with it though. phonebook#alarmingly some people don't even know i like portal which is really funny#because my youtube has a bunch of crappy portal fan animations and my sona's orange hoodie is an Aperture hoodie#but i never draw myself from behind. so. actually can't blame you dhjbfjhdsfghj#my most popular video has over a million views because i edited glados into a cafeteria as a school project#i was Not Normal about portal or blue sky. not even remotely#i LOVE portal its my FAVORITE videogame#IF YOU'VE BEEN FOLLOWING ME SINCE MY CRAPPY PORTAL FANART DAYS YOU ARE A REAL ONE !!!!!!!!!!!!
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I feel like alice might've wanted to kick the pond in the shins but how do you kick an eldritch pond in the shins
#actually I think elliot wants to more than her#he is So Done#he has so much understated trauma that no one seems to understand or acknowledge it's absolutely wild#those were really some fighting words from him#I just. need to rewatch this a dozen times to really unpack his character it's just. wow.#and the 1814 arc?? not disappointing#like augustine? you mean THAT augustine??#“it's okay I got shot ” sksksksksk#also I have got to know what happened in that house#the amount of lore and interconnection is crazy#I lowkey feel bad for brady he doesn't get to see his daughter he doesn't understand he doesn't know that she and kat are literally#so obsessed about the past that they're basically throwing away their present!!#“don't worry about it” you should worry about it#can't trust the pond#what. an episode.#I thought tonight would be my relaxing time after a weekend full of homework. Wrong. I am a Fool.#I need two to three business days to process this#but can you blame me?? I kinda keep waiting for this to start acting like a hallmark series (you know. hallmark.) but it's not!!#oughhhh#the way home hallmark#earl crow ramblings
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Why am I having a crush on this guy? /rh /nm

#I MEAN COME ON YOU CAN'T BLAME ME#AND I HAVE A SOFT SPOT FOR SHY PEEPS OKAY#IT'S NOT EVERY DAY YOU RUN INTO A CHARACTER WHO'S A GENTLE GIANT#AND THAT MEANS HE'S VERY HUGGABLE#SO MY TOUCH STARVED SELF GETS ATTACHED TO HIM IMMEDIATELY#(I really need therapy ;w;)#inside out#inside out 2#inside out fandom#inside out embarrassment#txt
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Ooof
Looking at old posts, sometimes you just ask yourself what was I thinking 😅
#only then you realize maybe i did change a bit#i'm feeling embarassed about some of the things i said#maybe i really was an insufferable person at times 😅#but maybe that retrospective opinion is also normal#i really really should have worded some things better#altough i still stand with some of my opinions but i definetly would argue in a different way#like god was i overdramatic i know i might still be sometimes today but not as much#i feel like now i'm much more logical and level headed in comparisson also in how i try to get my point accross#and i got so worked up over things i got no control over like yeah sure some things may be very unfair but you have to move on#like i still feel my rants about gregor's treatment from ösv and it makes me very upset when i think about how it ended#but at the end of the day there's no way you could influence such decisions in any way altough ranting helps yes#but like now in football if i get worked up over some coaches decisions which harm my team in my opinion ... yeah frustrating but ...#i can't change it#or some athlete who is hard done by their club or whatever no matter how unfair it might be i can do nothing#can only hope they make the best of their situation but ultimately no things i have no controll over are sth i should think abt all day#doesn't mean i never get upset ... i still do sometimes very much but i'm much better at distancing myself from these things after some time#tbf it does help gregor my alltime favourite isn't involved anymore but i still believe i would act differently#like yeah some things sucked but he was a more than capable and great athlete and smart person who had to deal with all that stuff -#and i could do nothing about all the things i felt were unfair#also not just related to these things i remember in school i blamed my teachers sooo much for bad grades#i had some really bad teachers one who i am sure disliked me but i underestimated the hand i played in this#like sure she was all that but i completely put all blame on her and convinced myself there was nothing i could have done better#when now i know SURELY i could have studied more bc i really didn't know what studying a lot even meant in school#i was so lazy and also instead of trying to make an effort to get on my teachers good side like hers i just thought it's pointless anyway#... thinking to myself she won't ever like me no matter what i do ... not that i'm the person now to kiss up to others but just be polite#and put in your best effort it does wonders ... like if your uni professors like you makes life sm easier and getting better grades as well#or extensions on papers lol#i almost did the opposite in school i was not outright rude or smth but i don't think i was very good at hiding my dislike for here#well anyways#besides also so many of things i liked and hobbies i had i really couldn't imagine having this life anymore 😅
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