#so yk the guy ive got a crush on right. so i think his friend is trying to flirt with me and i just havent noticed. like at all until now

[vengeful4ever]

ALSO I MADE A TERRIBLE REALISATION EARLIER

[thxnks4themrms]

i know you're not going to answer this ask for a bit bcs its like 3 am at the time of sending this, but yk ive been thinking thoughts for the past 20 minutes or so

like ive been dressing actually kind of emo for the past week or so, if not dressing like it im at least wearing eyeliner and this guy that im in a weird situation with (mutual crush, no relationship typa thing) has just been entirely acting weird abt me, even at one point during lunch pointing at me and talking to his friends abt me

prior to the emo-ness he was completely normal about me, just being cringe (pos) towards me and stuff

but the change in attitude got me thinkin

no matter how much i like him back, if he doesnt like how i dress or my eyeliner, i dont care about him. like if eyeliner is the one thing that gets in the way of talking to a girl, then do you really like him? like my confidence has fucking SKYROCKETED in the past week and i rather have a bunch of confidence on my own than no confidence and with somebody

sorry for writing an entire essay in your inbox, im just thinking a lot of thoughts right now

-🐧

No no no I like totally get it it’s okay. Like what I got from that is like he’s kinda weird and like he’s sort of a dick for like talking abt you after you started dressing a little different. THATS JUST ME THO OFC

N yeah you’re right abt the eyeliner thing getting in the way being stupid n shit. Like I personally think of shit like that as that one saying that goes “if u truly love someone then u wouldn’t be weird abt things u use to be weird abt before” or some shit along those lines n it it’s veryy true

Anywaysssss you should do what makes you happy and what makes you feel good abt yourself and I think that’s so real of you for like sayin you’d rather have a bunch of confidence on your own than with somebody

[short-black-diamond]

DIA MY FRIENDS ARE ENABLING MY FEELINGD!!!!!!

H is so nice.

(Below is almost direct copy paste of what i sent friends)

Dog omg we went to charity shops to try get a shirt for his halloween costume and we got food, but i had to hold his stuff while he tried on a jacket and oml not to sound weird but like just holding his jacket was so nice 😭 like it was warm and he generally smelled nice NOT TO BE WEIRD I SWEAR i just aghhhh plus he treats me like an actual friend yk? Cause he makes fun of me for datinf J n all lmao

Lmfao made a joke today, i said how im gonna give friend name a big smooch on her birthday and im gonna do the same for friend name and Friend name and he joked by saying “I expect big things on march 21st”

(End of copy paste)

BROOOOO

I think i might start trying to colour code the messages i send so they aren’t as grammatically horrible!! Tehehe

Me manifesting feelings away cause i don’t wanna weird him out:

I swear its platonic

Its platonic

Its platonic

We’re just friends

Just friends

My friend said it’s obvious we both like each other as a joke

A JOKE RIGHT???

Im helpless dia!!!

(Im denying everything but you know i do)—

-🍓

(Please read the paragraphs I’ve wrote about him in the past!!! Then you’ll know how damn long ive had this subtle crush that is 100 percent platonic snd not any real feelings (i am avouding them) )

hvwecmthzwncuhr

ye you better avoid it. but he seems to be a chill guy.

Dia...approves H as a friend.

NOTHING MORE.

-your dia <3

[mayonakano-archive]

btw this is also a cry for help bc i dont know how to. like deal w this this kind of stuff never happens at my school!! i think. maybe i just dont care enough

but basically theres this guy he's my friend right. he's leaving class (we had an exam today so we left early today and he goes by the buses while my parents pick me up so. yeah) and then he stops and is like

"Hey neo (he didnt actually call me that he said my name but yk) there's someone I like. She's in this class. You can ask [friend 1] or [friend 2] but I cant tell you her name because I'm shy. Can you ask about her grades and tell me on Thursday?" thursday's our next exam btw

this is like. sort of paraphrasing but contains the gist and I just want to scream BECAUSE WHY IN HELL DID HE TELL ME. IS THIS SUPPOSED TO MEAN HE HAS A CRUSH ON ME??? I DIDNT ASK HIS FRIENDS BC HOW DO YOU DO THAT LIKE HEY YOUR BRO TOLD ME HAS A CRUSH ON SOMEBODY. WHO IS IT. WHEN YOU DONT CARE

AND WHAT IF HE DOES HAVE A CRUSH ON ME??? I DONT HAVE ACRUSH OTHER THAN ON LIKE. FICTIONAL CHARACTERS. THIS IS ASIA MAN WE ARENT ALLOWED TO HAVE CRUSHES BY LAW!!! (law as in. parents. haha i am one of the supposed to be smart kids woo)

AND IF ITS SOMEONE ELSE. WHY DOES HE WANT ME TO ASK. IS T THAT HARD TO TALK TO YOUR CRUSH IVE NEVR HAD ONE IM CONFUSED. HE DOESNT EVEN NEED TO TELL HER SHE'S HIS CRUSH HE CAN JUST ASK HER LIKE HEY HOWRE YOUR EXAMS GOING

okay i got that off myc hest what do you think bc youre the first person ive told!! its been 5 hours since he told me and ive been getting increasingly worried

understandable. but. i can speak from experience: this is like A Thing that happens over here. people will make other people talk to their crushes for them??? it's. so weird. i don't get it either. i also don't tend to get crushes on anyone aside from fictional characters. hewwo????

BUT LIKE??? WHY DID HE TELL YOU??? IS IT YOU??? it seem sus that he's like "haha go ask my friends" instead of just. t. telling you who it is. why did he do that. tbh if you don't care i think you should just. continue ignoring it. like...... what are you realistically gonna do with the information????? in a way i get it tho it can be scary to talk to your crush but at the same time like??? JUST ASK HOW HER EXAMS ARE GOING??? THAT'S THE LEAST SUS TOPIC OF CONVERSATION EVER???

godspeed neo. i'm wishing you luck. crush drama is so weird.

[bellamygateoldblog]

i will never be over the way this show has continuously tried to frame bellamy and clarke as heroes and good people, or the way the fandom has almost completely embraced and supported that narrative

the amount of times i’ve read “[clarke] saved everyone’s ungrateful asses” makes me seriously consider turning evil. like aren’t y’all bored? don’t you have a different sentence you would like to say for a change?

i want to talk about this but i probably don’t remember a lot of the details of this show so if im forgetting something or get something wrong i apologise, but i never have any desire to rewatch past s2.

clarke isn't even the hero of her own side, she took power of them using the military force of the grounders, someone else’s people, she’s forced them into alliances without their knowledge that weren’t in their best interest (while she literally had no idea what they were even going through because she’d abandoned them after upsetting their entire political structure, and this leader she’s bowing to is responsible for the slaughter of their children, has broken an alliance previously with them, has hung the threat of genocide over their heads, and who isn’t even wanted in power by her own people- dragging skaikru into that conflict, too), she’s sacrificed them and what’s best for them in order to cater to/concentrate on the grounders newest demands or pursue her own personal mission, she’s lied to and patronised them, she’s abandoned them and surrendered them to die while they were under her protection and responsibility, and in Book 2 (and these aren’t her people but in canon she’s their leader anyway apparently despite trying to blow them all up a few days before...) she’s abandoned them again, and is speaking for them without consent or any connection to what’s happening with them again,.........her inner circle/her ‘friends’ have to be extremely careful to remain important to her or on her team or they’ll be sacrificed, harmed or become acceptable losses to whatever her newest goal is too (but hey at least she says she cares about them) all while acting very ‘woe is me’ about the whole crushing weight of responsibility she shouldn’t have.

but she’s the hero, she’s beloved, she’s special, she has relationships that were never built, she and only she saved everyone again and has all the lines telling us so no matter how dishonest those statements are.

like this is where i personally see what you said in your ask most: when it concerns clarke.

bellamy on the other hand...i don’t place him at all on the same level as clarke when it comes to this. clarke has privilege that bellamy just never had as a character. and i think that does probably play into why i like him.

him being a hero to the delinquents/the 48 is completely believable to me. he was the original leader, he got them through a tough time, he chose to put himself on the line for them, and he’s the one who stayed. i also think it’s reasonable that fandom might romanticise him this way because he is one who has been shown to value the one life as well as the many of his people, a guy doing his best and making big mistakes along the way, a mixed complex bag of good and bad, i find him very likable and i love the toxic/pained/vulnerable ones lol but more than anything i find him to be one of the more interesting/entertaining characters on the show (Book 1).

we also see him torment himself with his own mistakes instead of just having other people do it for him/remind him like we see happen with clarke- and we all know fandom loves equating that with a “redemption arc” and as much as i personally dislike seeing pity parties i do like self-awareness and responsibility in characters that goes beyond a 3-second-long puppy dog look or straight dismissal of someone else’s pain, and for the most part bellamy’s expressions of this don’t come across as demanding sympathy from others but from genuine self-loathing and an honesty to himself, internalising the effects of his actions/childhood.

i know i personally prefer The Flawed Protector over The Tortured Saviour nobody asked for (same white male hypocritical moral hero in a woman’s body).

i don’t believe in assigning “hero” to any of them though like that’s the whole entire point of the show lol “there are no good guys.” and i also think a major chunk of fandom/shippers have warped bellamy’s character so much that it isn’t even him anymore, so this man they’re celebrating as a hero/good person isn’t even bellamy sometimes.

all of the genuinely “good” and kind people are dead.

i don't think i'd say bellamy was ever framed as a hero. like he was just never important enough to be, he’s just not put into those positions (despite being the male lead), clarke is. as the protagonist ig. bellamy...he’s the protector/knight of the heroes, but not the actual hero himself (applies to octavia too i think, where she acts and he reacts).

like take mount weather, clarke becomes empowered by her “wanheda” status, bellamy’s (and monty’s) part in that is lost...clarke is “bearing it so they don’t have to” (rme) which simultaneously strips the other boys from claiming the ‘victory’ of saving the 48 while still leaving them with the guilt, like it suits how i see clarke perfectly that she’s the only one to refer to the genocide (and shutting down the CoL, i realised) as “i” while monty and bellamy say “we” and it was clarke’s actions that got them to that point in the first place, but this is one of those times she’s clearly The Protagonist. if that makes sense lol.

bellamy is on the opposite side to clarke in s3 and s7 and he needs to be moved to her side in order to be on the ‘right’ one. now i don’t agree with that one bit mind you (when it comes to s3, idc about s7 lol) and i didnt see it that way but imo that’s how the show wrote it, to the point he was either demonized endlessly by fandom or woobified in a way that denied him his own agency. during s5 i don’t i think anyone was framed in a good light. i can see this applying in s6, though- where he was his absolute worst self yet, betraying his own development, failing at every point to “do better” despite claiming it, but still was given that reasurring line that they did better and saved people and was in that “heroic” position i guess? but is that because he was back to being clarke’s “good little knight” tho? (but do we claim s6??? do we really??? do we claim it ladies???)

s6 was 100% dedicated to making clarke look good/like a 'good' or sympathetic person. the bodysnatching plot (and the s6 sheidheda plot because if it was supposed to be about bellamy and address his s5 actions he would’ve been present to experience/observe those consiquences himself but he wasn’t lmaoooo. instead it was to tell the audience ‘actually clarke was right last season and here’s another reason to feel bad for her and how those ungrateful bitches were treating her’) has no other purpose for existing. clarke's character has consistently been elevated at the expense of everyone else's. but im not sure the writing did a very good job convincing me she was a good person if it was trying to do that LMAO like my interpretation of her is so fitted to canon, and no amount of throwaway lines telling me how good she is did anything to change what i saw yk? and in s6, combined with being patronised by the writers, i found her to be at some of her most obnoxious.

i don’t agree with placing bellamy and clarke in the same boat tbh. like they just come from completely different places and come across differently, especially in the way they interact with other characters.

in my experience this fandom (on tumblr) is extremely skewed in favour of clarke, like ive never seen a fandom so obsessed with their protagonist. there’s A LOT of clarke stans who stan her for being one of those “deserves better :(” characters, selfless and heroic, and support that view that she’s the superior character, entitled to other character’s devotion, love and validation yet doesn’t have to reciprocate any of it. the CL/BC ship war was just a bunch of people fighting over clarke, who deserves her more, which character is more toxic to her, which other character would 100% be her bff supportive of that relationship, treating her as a passive whose actions don’t take affect. im not sure how much i blame the writing for that because if so many of us are capable of recieving her character in this way then...why aren’t so many other people? how is there such a massive disconnect between the ways we see her?

and imo a lot of the bellamy love in this fandom comes from shipping him with clarke too rather than being because of who he actually is.

[tendouluvr]

Share some hcs you have about Karasuno please ! Literally anything. 💕🥺

where do i start😪

ok high school, pre timeskip hcs

tanaka and nishinoya will hold doors open for you but you’re like 20ft away so you have to awkwardly speed walk

i think they would also coordinate roaming the halls together at specific times. they would both ask to go to the restroom and if theyre in different classes they’ll just pass by each other in the hallway and laugh for the fun of it

if they’re in the same class then the teachers tell them one person at a time because they know not to let them out together

you always see at least one of them in the hallway any time you need to use the restroom or refill your bottle, you’re all friendly with each other so they would def stop to talk to you in the hallway and youre just tryna get back to class

yamaguchi knows everything about everyone. he just happens to overhear a lot of things even if he didn’t mean to (lowkk be gossiping but he just knows too much he has to tell someone)

yK HOW HES Really Tall. Ugh he helps you reach for books if you can’t reach it. that’s so polite of him 🙄 also helps you carry books and boxes if he sees you in the hallways

yamaguchi is in theater club.

hinata (& bokuto) is emotionally intelligent. my smart boy💭💭

i wanna say he waits for you when you need to tie your shoes, but he might not even notice you stopped walking in the first place until he’s like a bit ahead and realized you weren’t there to answer his question

but dw he sprints back and apologizes a lot and waits for you

on the other hand, daichi does notice if you stopped walking and would politely wait for you while you finish tying your shoes

also waits for you at the end of lunch to walk back to class together

one time you forgot your water bottle with him and only realized when you were already in class so you walk back out to get it but daichi was actually walking towards your class to give it to you at the same time so you guys were going in circles and you came back into class seeing your water bottle on your desk </3

sugawara is happy to help you always but he’s kinda passive aggressive about it for whatever reason

intentional or not, everything he says always sound like it has subtext and you’re just ,,,, 🕴🏻

he is helpful though so you just ignore whatever you think he’s trying to say

tsukishima actually slacks off on schoolwork a lot, he’s smart and has really good grades but he’s also tireeeeddd

if it’s due the next day, he’ll start on it late at night because he claims he’s more productive at night. if it’s not due until a few days later, he’ll keep it till the day before. he does get everything done eventually but he puts it off and it stresses him out even more

comes to school purposefully looking stressed sometimes so no one bothers him

kageyama would unintentionally remind the teacher about homework.

he didn’t mean to.. all he did was asked, “is there homework?” to the person beside him because he genuinely didn’t know, but he was a bit too loud and the teacher heard

he can’t decide whether he’s sorry or not :// he doesn’t care about his classmates honestly, but now he has homework too :((( not like he does it

asahi gets mistaken as a teacher by new students all the time and the other third years just laugh while he stands there trying to tell the newbies he’s also a student

yachi 😆 always has the best looking projects, slideshow, presentation, poster, etc. her teachers are always looking forward to seeing what she comes up with every time. she never runs out of ideas. the people who takes school seriously are jealous of her, and the ones who don’t care still thinks it looks nice but they don’t really care lol

she’s like 4 feet so some people who don’t know her thinks she’s like some super smart middle schooler who got to skip grades and go to high school early

you see her in the hallways a lot and she will always wave at you. it’s so cute

kiyoko,, hmm she takes any school assignments a little too seriously. it’s not a bad thing, she’s doing this to keep her good grades, but if the class/assignment is something that can just be quickly googled and the teacher doesn’t care kiyoko would still research as much as she can and then memorize everything she wrote to do a maximum-of-5-minutes presentation

in which the teacher does allow you to look at your notes if needed TT

ennoshita he thinks anyone that looks at him a bit too long has a crush on him

whether they do or don’t, he doesn’t do anything about it either way but he would definitely subconsciously start acting mysterious so he can seem hard to read,, -_-

lowk thinks this way cuz it helps him with his confidence

idk abt kinoshita and narita that much D: they got like 10 mins of screentime and all ive seen them done is react during games and play a little :/

but i assume they’re best friends (all those bench warming bonding moments am i right) so hc that they have a third bff who’s not on the team but you guys hang out together all the time

they play a lot of video games

hang out together on saturdays a ton

the typical neighbor friend

kinoshita secretly says pog and epic a bit too much :// his little sisters are tired of him