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lonely-moons · 4 months ago

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♡୭something good | sam winchester x reader, pt. 1

title: something good, pt. 1 (read pt. 2 here)

pairing: stanford!sam winchester x socially anxious!reader

warnings: lotssss of overthinking, reader is awkward and a nerd but also lowkey a little cool, social anxiety, sam winchester being a cutie patootie, references to fandoms i'm not in rip lotr fans and dnd players my bad

summary: when you're forced to tackle a group project, you briefly debate throwing yourself in a pit of fire - you're not much one for working with other people. but maybe this is something you needed after all

wc: 2,412

masterlist

when your professor first mentions the words 'group project,' you have to physically bite down on your tongue to avoid groaning. they're the bane of your existence, and you allow yourself a moment of wondering whether education is really worth all of this. but you force it down as your class ends and make your way to where the list of names has been tacked to the wall, a sigh crawling its way up from deep in your chest.

you find your name next to one you can't place a face to. it's not surprising - you don't really have any friends in college, something that's followed you through from school even after you'd tried so hard to evade it. the college emails of each student are in a column beside the names, so you take note of it and hope to god that whoever sam winchester is, he's at least going to pull his weight.

you get the email from him before you're done with classes for the day, a simple one asking you when you'll be free to discuss the work. you both decide on tomorrow evening in the library, you moreso hoping to just get this over with rather than being particularly eager.

the time rolls around quickly, and at 7 p.m. the next day, you're heading to the library with a dread roiling in your gut. it's not that you hate meeting new people - you're just bad at it. you never quite know what to say, and even if you think you do, it always seems to come out wrong. like the words somehow scrape along the sides of your throat as they crawl their way up, get tossed about on your tongue until they're coming out completely unrecognisable from how they started. it's something you've always dealt with, but it seems to get worse as you get older, while everyone else prances ahead and you're left behind in the dust.

you don't have much hope as you're greeted with the musty smell of the library, your eyes scanning around for someone who looks like they could be there for a group project. you spot three candidates, three guys on their own, but two of them you vaguely recognise from classes.

it's a brief moment, but the panic sets in so entirely that the seconds seem to stretch on for minutes. you're so desperate to escape the embarrassment of going up to the wrong one that you consider leaving, sending sam some message about an emergency coming up and hoping that this goes better next time. but then one of them turns around, his eyes catching on you, and he smiles in your direction.

he shifts in his seat to face you a little more, his hand raising into small wave. your panic flushes out entirely, and you mentally chide yourself for being so dramatic. you're okay, you tell yourself as you head for the seat at table. you don't need the adrenaline levels of someone being hunted for sport.

"hey," he says when you're close enough, slinking your bag off of your shoulder. "y/n, right?"

"yeah, hey." you send him a smile that you hope looks okay. in your head it's still tinged with the remnants of some of your previous panic. "sam, i hope?" you wince; who the hell else would he be at this point?

but his smile remains intact. "yeah. it's nice to finally meet you. i mean, i've seen you around in classes and just on campus, but you usually look pretty busy."

you've slid into your seat, the uncomfortable wood making you want to shift around, but you remain still. if you were on your own, you'd probably have your feet up on it by now, shimmying around to find some kind of position that works. but you are not alone. "busy time of year." you shrug, knowing that he probably hasn't seen you around and is just being polite - maybe he has, but you're positive he wouldn't remember. you've never been one to make much of an impact.

"hey, i get it," he says. "sometimes it feels like they expect us to just give up on sleep entirely."

you think of the dark circles under your eyes that you'd half-heartedly tried to cover with make up. "tell me about it."

he perks up a little, remembering something. "by the way, speaking of, i got us some fuel." with the pen in his hand, he gestures to the share bag of m&ms that's beside his water bottle. "apparently chocolate helps with concentration levels."

you look at the bag, and somehow your simple comment of thanks turns into - "isn't it dark chocolate that does that?"

sam doesn't miss a beat. "yeah, well dark chocolate would make this even more miserable."

your lips twitch slightly. "fair."

"so, anyway, you wanna get started on this?"

you begin to look at the project guidelines, silently reading over the instructions even though you've done it about ten times today alone. but you appreciate the minute to gather your thoughts, trying to keep your eyes on the paper and not glancing at sam.

he's sweet, is the first thing to come to mind. you've witnessed plenty of college boys who act as though they run the place, who treat anyone different than them as lesser creatures. you thought people were meant to grow out of all that crap after high school, but evidently they had missed the memo.

you think that sam would be a nice friend to have, if only you knew how to go about doing that. the entire future of your interactions play out in your mind: you'll meet up a couple more times to do this project, maybe say something to one another in the class where you submit it. at most, any passing greetings will last a week before he manages to shake you off, and then you'll be back to another face in his class once again. even if you did ask for his number under the guise of project work, you know you'd never be able to text him after it was submitted. he wouldn't text you either. not only would you be a forgotten name, but also a random set of digits in his phone. the thought feels heavy in your head, refusing to budge.

"hey, are you okay?"

you blink, startled slightly, and find sam looking at you. there's a small crease between his eyebrows that makes it look like he genuinely wants to know.

"yeah." you clear your throat, wondering how you'd managed to zone out for so long. not for the first time, you wish the ground would swallow you whole. "yeah, i'm good. sorry, just got lost in thought."

"no, don't worry about. have you thought about which sections you want to cover?"

you spend the next few minutes dividing up which of you will cover the different topics of the paper. he's sweet about that too, always letting you have the first choice and triple-checking that you're okay with what you've landed with. by the time you're getting ready to move onto the next step, he's opened the packet of m&ms.

you worry that he's noticed your glance in their direction, because he takes a few for himself and then nudges the bag in your direction.

"concentration myth might be a bust, but they do taste pretty good."

you let a reluctant smile crawl up your face and grab one to pop into your mouth. turning it down would feel mean and, besides, you do really want some.

"so what classes are you taking?"

you glance at sam, not that surprised. the typical round of polite questioning has happened before, mostly during the first weeks, but they still pop up occasionally. especially when you don't have your crowd and every exchange is with someone new.

you list off your modules like second nature. "and for extra credit this semester i'm doing occult studies."

his eyebrows raise, like he's a little surprised at the fact. "occult studies, huh? like supernatural stuff?"

your polite smile turns a little sheepish now. "yeah. i've always kinda been into that kinda thing and they had space, so..."

he nods a little, like he finds it interesting, like it answers something he's been wondering. "oh, i get it."

"get what?" you ask, taking another m&m if mostly just to give yourself something to do.

"you're a nerd."

you crunch down on the shell in your surprise at his words. but they're not laced with mockery or any kind of insult. if anything, they're just a little teasing, interested, and the grin on his face makes you believe he doesn't mean any harm.

you look down at your outfit on impulse. "was it the spider-man shirt or occult studies that gave you that impression?"

you hadn't noticed that his grin was a little tight, but now it loosens completely. he seems glad that you're leaning into this. "actually," his eyes flicker down to your backpack, "it was more the 12-sided dice key chain."

"technically it's a die because it's only one -" you cut yourself off at the amused look on his face, wondering why you were becoming so free with trusting your mouth to open. it's all his fault, stupid sam winchester and his stupid smile. "never mind."

"no, tell me about it. you play, uh..." he thinks for a moment, "dungeons and dragons?"

it's the first time you've given in to shifting in your seat. you know how people view the game, how often people make fun of it. your small group in high school hadn't even lasted two years before disbanding. you'd kept it up as a solo hobby ever since, even if it'd been way more fun with the extra three people.

"... a little." you hate that it comes out almost defensive, like you've been conditioned into having to explain yourself. you wait for a follow-up comment, something you'll dissect late into the night as you look from every angle at how it's further ruined his perception of you.

"what's it like?"

your pre-prepared wince isn't needed. "the game?"

he nods.

you wonder if he is genuinely curious or just that good at acting. "oh, um... it's fun, i guess. kinda like an interactive book or something, you know?" now you get to use that wince.

"you like to read?"

"you've already called me a nerd, i think you know the answer to that."

his laugh comes out as a huff of air. "i'll join the club, then, i like to read too."

"what kind of stuff?"

"oh, you know, just the classics. i don't really go near anything written after the nineteenth century."

"oh." you clear your throat, any hope of relating vanishing. "that's, um... cool."

"i'm kidding," he says lightly, eyes flickering to your hand that's still clutching the pen you haven't even used in fifteen minutes. "i like lord of the rings."

your hand clenches, the ring on your finger suddenly feeling heavy. for your last birthday your parents had gotten you a replica of the one ring. you wore it almost every day. you're surprised sam had noticed.

"you like fantasy?" it comes out more bewildered than you'd like, but you really wouldn't have guessed it to even be in his top three genres.

"yeah, i've read a lot of it."

"huh."

"what?" he raises an eyebrow, amused.

"didn't take you for a fantasy guy."

"why not?"

you know your real answer, the one that remains firmly locked inside your head: he's attractive. annoyingly so. and, yeah, you know that looks don't dictate what's inside and all that crap, but from your experience, people who look like him don't go for that kind of stuff. then again, lots of people who look like him aren't generally so nice either.

you shrug. "you're a law guy. that usually means pretentious."

"we take the same classes, you know."

"which means i've witnessed all that pretentiousness first hand."

he releases a small laugh and something about it warms your chest. it hits you then that you're really just having a normal conversation. maybe it's sad, but it's been a while since it's come this easy. you blink and go for another m&m so that you can tear your eyes away from his face.

"you're something else," he says.

your hand pauses for just a second in the bag and you ask, as though the answer doesn't even matter to you, "is that a good thing or a bad thing?"

"good," he answers, like he hadn't even considered the alternative. "it's definitely good."

you grow a little uncomfortable under how genuine he sounds, and it certainly doesn't help that his stupid smile is still there, still directed right at you.

"you'll take that back once i've eaten all your m&ms." you steal another for good measure.

"well, what chocolate do you not like? i'll bring that next time."

the dig is what registers first, which you're glad for as your body automatically releases a mock gasp. it's a much better reaction than being surprised he wants to meet up again, which is what sinks in now. this project doesn't focus too much on the group aspect; you easily could've gone your separate ways and just emailed one another if you needed to check anything. one more meetup, max, if any problems came up, but nothing long enough for a study snack. you half assume he just said it for the joke - you usually would - but there's something that tells you he means it.

"and here i was thinking you're not half bad."

his smile is more of a smirk now. "is that a good thing or a bad thing?"

"bad." your expression half matches his. "definitely bad."

the conversation keeps up until before you know it, the librarian is ushering you out for closing time. you don't even know how it happened, but somehow underneath those fluorescent lights and across from sam, you actually enjoyed meeting someone.

sam asks for your number before you head your separate ways. you try not to act surprised, but something about the way his own smile widens at the light in your eyes makes you think that he knows you'd been hoping for it.

you go to bed that night the lightest you've felt in weeks, with sam winchester's number in your phone and his stupid smile ingrained in your mind's eye.

#about half of this was written during a class while i was dreading an upcoming group project lmao #spn #supernatural #sam winchester #sam winchester x reader #sam winchester x you #sam winchester x y/n #sam winchester fanfiction #sam winchester fanfic #sam winchester fic #winchester #stanford sam

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zegrasdrysdale · 7 months ago

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“who did this to you?”

with jamie drysdale

part of the 1k celly event

summary : after an encounter with an ex that leaves her with some bruising and feeling unsafe, she finds herself in Jamie's apartment, where her best friend is there for her like he always is

warning(s) : mentions of abuse / an abusive event, a past toxic relationship, oc made up for the plot

author’s note : i felt v inspired to write something for jamie so here y'all go

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She shouldn't have come out tonight. That's the only thing she can think of as she sits on the back of an ambulance. Her friend is talking to authorities while her face, wrist, and hand get checked out. Her ex-boyfriend is cuffed and being put in the back of a police car.

Her cheekbone stings and she can barely see out of her left eye. Her wrist is sore from landing on it awkwardly when she fell, and her hand hurts from being able to land one punch in self defense. She spoke to the same authorities as she was making sure her hand wasn't broken from that punch she landed.

The officer she spoke to made it clear that she wasn't in the wrong. He started everything when he came up to her and harassed her. She gave him several chances to walk away when he approached her. All she did was gently push him away from her when he got too close, and he started going off on her. That's how she ended up with a bruised face, busted up hand, and sore wrist.

It was all worth it though because she's been waiting for her asshole ex to finally go to jail for what he did to her during their relationship. She has all the pictures and proof they would need to put him away for awhile when she sends it to authorities.

For now though, she needs to go home and shower. She feels gross since her ex put his hands on her. Plus, a warm shower sounds like a dream.

Her friend comes over to her when she's done talking with the officer. The EMT looks between them as he finishes up his exam.

"I don't see a reason to go to the hospital tonight," he explains. "The cut on your cheek is superficial so it doesn't require stitches. I don't suspect any broken bones but if things feel like they're not getting any better by next week then head to an Urgent Care or the emergency room. Your neuro function is intact so I don't suspect brain injury. Ice and heat on your wrist and hand, and maybe even ice your cheek and eye to keep swelling down. Over the counter meds like Ibuprofen should be strong enough to keep pain at bey but again, if it gets too painful or things don't improve, seek medical help. Any questions?"

Both girls shake their heads. "Thank you," she tells the EMT. "Glad I'm not going to the hospital tonight."

The EMT packs up the medical kit. "I wouldn't drive until the swelling around your eye goes down," he suggests.

"I drove us here today so no worries," her friend replies. "Thanks for checking her out and keeping her out of the hospital."

He nods and the girls head to the car. She looks at her friend as they approach her car. The duo get in and heat immediately greets both of them as soon as the car is turned on. She hums at the warm air. It was too cold outside in her tiny dress and now broken heels.

She looks out the window as the police car with her ex drives off.

Her ex-boyfriend is probably not happy that he's going to jail, but he'll probably get out on bail until whatever happens next. The thought of him getting out of jail makes her stomach do somersaults. She gets very nervous going back to her apartment all by herself.

As her friend pulls out of the parking lot, she asks, "Can you drop me off at Jamie's instead of my place?"

"Yeah, sure," her friend replies. "Don't feel like going back to your own apartment?"

She shakes her head and looks out the window at the passing buildings. "I don't feel very safe going there by myself," she explains. "Security isn't exactly the best."

"I get it. I'll take you to Jamie's. I was thinking about doing that for the same reason."

The car ride gets quiet after that comment. She plays with her fingers and rubs her wrist when it gets too painful.

She thinks back to the events of the night and thinks that maybe she provoked him. She did shove him away from her so maybe it is her fault that she ended up in this position. It's always her fault anyway. It was always her fault when they were together so why would now be any different?

It wouldn't be any different.

Fifteen minutes after they leave the bar, the car pulls up to Jamie's apartment building. She thanks her friend for the ride and gets out. Shaking from the cold and the night's events, she pushes the buzzer to his apartment.

Hopefully he lets her in because it's kind of late. She has to push the button for a second time and slowly begins to lose hope that he's up.

"Who is it?" Jamie's voice suddenly comes from the intercom.

"It's me," she replies. "It's cold. Can I come up?"

The door in front of her buzzes and she lets herself into the building. She takes the elevator up to the fifth floor. She makes her way down the hallway to Jamie's apartment.

She only has to knock three times before the door swings open.

Jamie's eyes widen as he takes in her appearance. The sight of him is enough to make her lip wobble as she holds back tears. He reaches up and gently cups her face. His thumb grazes the cut on her cheek.

"Who did this to you?" he asks, voice soft. "Oh my God."

"I'm okay," she tells him. "Bruised and in a little pain but I'm okay. No broken bones, no concussion. It was Evan. I went out tonight with a friend and he was there and he-" She cuts herself off. "He got too close and I pushed him away and he attacked me."

"Come here."

He pulls her into his arms and envelopes her in a hug. She buries her face in his chest, ignoring the sharp pain that accompanies her action. Her tears begin to flow, wetting his t-shirt.

The door shuts behind her. Jamie's fingers run through her curls as he just holds her.

Neither of them speak, but his hug is enough to make her feel safer than she ever has. Since their breakup, she's been terrified that Evan was going to pull something like this. She never got a restraining order because that meant she would've had to actually file a report, and that would've only pissed him off.

Being here with Jamie though, she feels incredibly safe. His arms are her home. They've always been her home. She's always wanted them to be her home.

"Let's get you changed and into bed," Jamie says. "I'm sure you want to get into something more comfortable. Plus, you look a little cold. and my bed is nice and warm."

She pulls back and looks up at her best friend. Jamie reaches up to gently dry her cheeks, avoiding the cut and bruises on her face. She leans into his touch and Jamie doesn't move his hands. She wishes she could see out of both her eyes because all she wants to do is look at Jamie.

Feelings have always been there for him. She's had some kind of feelings for Jamie for years, but it was recently when she realized that she loved him. The only place she wanted to be was here after Evan attacked her at the bar.

Her first thought when Evan was landing punch after punch was how much she wished Jamie was there to protect her. He probably wouldn't have gone after her had Jamie been there.

"Thank you for letting me crash here," she whispers. "I know it's kind of a burden with your schedule-"

"You'll never be a burden," Jamie interrupts. "You could've shown up here at three in the morning on a game day and I'd still be up and opening the door for you. You're more important than hockey, and you always will be."

Her vision gets blurry all over again as she looks up at him. "I don't deserve you," she tells him, voice cracking in the process. Jamie tries to say something but she shakes her head. "I don't, Jamie. You've always been here for me despite your crazy life. You've always made time for me no matter where you are or what's going on in your life."

"Because you're my best friend," he explains. "And I-" Jamie cuts himself off, shaking his head. "You're more important than anything that's going on in my life."

The tears fall over and roll down her cheeks. Jamie's thumbs wipe them away. "Really?"

"Really," he softly tells her. "I would drop whatever I was doing to make sure you're okay. I mean it, okay. I'd even leave practice if you called and said you needed me somewhere, even if it meant that I got benched the next game. It kills me that I wasn't there to protect you tonight. I could've prevented this."

That's what she's wanted to hear. She's been waiting for those words to pass his lips. "I wanted you there tonight," she admits. "All I wanted after was you. Jamie, I wish you could've been there to protect me, but you're protecting me now by letting me be here."

He tucks a loose curl behind her ear. "You're welcome to stay as long as you want," he tells her. "Stay until you feel safe going back to your apartment by yourself. Hell, I'd be okay if you moved in if that would help you feel safer."

She nods and sucks on her bottom lip. "Thank you."

"That's what I'm here for," Jamie whispers. "Let's go get you changed, okay? We can talk more when you're more comfortable. I'll go grab you something to wear from my closet."

She nods for a second time and Jamie lets her go to go get her some clothes. Her eyes follow him before her feet begin to move. She follows him into his bedroom and he digs through his closet to grab something for her to sleep in. She leans against the doorframe.

Jamie tosses a t-shirt and pair of gym shorts onto the bed. "I'll let you get changed," he tells her. "Come out when you're done and I'll make you something to eat or get you a snack. Whatever you want, okay?"

"Okay," she agrees. "Thanks."

He nods and pushes past her to leave the room. She grabs his wrist as he walks by. Jamie stops in his tracks and looks at her, eyebrows raised in question.

Without an exchanged word, she pulls him toward her gently. Jamie looks down at her while her eyes scan his face. She reaches up and cups his stubbled jaw, tracing his cheekbones with her thumbs. Her heart races in her chest as she gets on her tiptoes to press a kiss to his cheek, dangerously close to the corner of his mouth. She lingers longer than she should before she pulls back and flattens her feet.

Seconds seem like hours as the two of them look at each other in the doorway of Jamie's bedroom. Neither of them have moved in a little bit. She doesn’t think she wants to move at this point.

Jamie makes the first move though. He returns the same cheek kiss and she closes her eyes, taking in his touch. She turns her head before he can pull back. His face is super close to hers, and he doesn’t move.

He mumbles something then crashes his lips to hers in a kiss that makes her head spin. Her fingers slide into his hair and cradle the back of his head.

She used to dream of his kisses when her feelings for him started to develop years ago. She had sweeter dreams where they would share soft kisses. There also were dreams where she would wake up and need a cold shower to calm herself down.

This is nothing like those dreams. She imagined their first kiss thousands of times, but she never imagined it would happen like this. It’s soft, yet heated. He’s being so careful not to hurt her.

That’s Jamie Drysdale.

The kiss is short, but it makes her want more. Just not tonight. It’s already been a long night.

“Get some sleep,” Jamie tells her. “I’ll talk to you in the morning.”

“Stay.”

“Not tonight. I want to make sure you’re safe first.”

“I’d be safer with you here with me,” she admits. “Don’t sleep on the couch. Stay with me. Jamie, please.”

He thinks about it for a second before he nods. “Okay. I’ll stay.”

If Jamie is going to do anything, it’s be there for her. He’s always there for her, no matter what.

And that’s what she loves most about him.

༺──────────────༻

MASTERLIST | 1K CELLY EVENT

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psychotrenny · 1 year ago

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There's a real unearned confidence to the way that Social Democrats talk about their ideology, like they've cracked the code and found the perfect way forward and the only reason people disagree is because they're misguided or evil. Like they'll correctly point out problems within Neoliberal Capitalism before spouting some absolute nonsense about how uniquely evil and dysfunctional Communism was (nearly always in the past tense too; they take it for granted that the end of the USSR was the end of all Communism) and then going "Don't worry though, there's a third way; a mixed regulated economy. We can have a free market in consumer goods while making sure that corporations pay their fair share in wages and taxes that can fund the welfare that looks after everyone". And like putting aside the fact that such a model relies on the super-profits of imperialist exploitation to actually function, and the inherent instability of an arrangement where the Bourgeoisie make concessions even while maintaining ultimate control of the economy, there's the simple fact that much of the Imperial Core did indeed had Social Democracy but does not anymore.

Like these Social Democrats never think about why that might be, why their ideology failed and what they can learn from it going forward. They just act as though some dumb individuals (i.e. Ronald Reagan, Milton Friedman etc.) managed to slip into power and make bad decisions and like the best way to fix this is to vote good people in who'll change it back. Like hell a lot of these people take the previous existence of these policies as like a good point, the whole "We had them before so we aren't being radical by wanting them back. We don't want anything crazy we just wanna bring back The New Deal or Keynesian Economic policy or whatever". There's never any thought about why those policies failed (how often do you hear these people even talk about "stagflation" or "the oil crisis" let alone the impact of the fall of the soviet union) and what implications this might have on the viability of bringing it back. They also love talking about how Social Democratic institutions are still largely intact in the Scandinavian countries, but rather than even consider what specific factors in their political-economic situation led to this these people just go "Damn isn't Sweden great. Why aren't we doing exactly what they do?"

And sure some people might compare this to Marxism-Leninism, the whole "trying to bring back a defeated ideology", but for one it's stupid to treat the dissolution of the USSR as the end of Communism as a global political force. It may have been a major blow, but even if you write off like Cuba and Vietnam as too small and insignificant to matter you can't just fucking ignore that over 1/6 of the world's population continues live under a Marxist Leninist party. Whatever concessions these countries may have made to global Capitalism, it's just plain ignorant to act as though Communism suffered anywhere near the humiliating loss of global power and credibility that Social Democracy has. Sure the latter may be more politically acceptable to toy with in "The West", but "The Western World" ≠ The Entire World. Also, nearly every ML on the planet is painfully aware that Soviet Communism collapsed and that it collapsed for a reason. There might be plenty of contention about why exactly it died and what exactly we can learn from this, but nearly everyone agrees that we need to learn and ideologically grow. No serious Communist wants to "bring back the USSR" in the same way that many Social Democrats want to "bring back The Welfare State". Far from being a form of "best of both worlds" mixed economy, Social Democracy is nothing more than a flimsy tool to stabilise Imperialist Capitalism at its moments of greatest strain. And if people are still gonna promote it wholeheartedly as the best possible solution, I wish they'd be a little less arrogant about it. It's not as though they have history on their side

#Stella Speaks

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kai34902 · 2 months ago

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Addiction to Tranquility

Blurb: When all eyes are on you, you are forced to preform. till your legs bleed, your heart torn apart, and your mind goes numb you must not stop. Until a boy who has no interest in anything but science and space becomes a safe haven for you.

Or alternatively

When two people realize their feelings too late, and now must rebuild civilization while also try to get rid of their feelings for the other. Just one problem: they're addicted to each other

°❀⋆.ೃ࿔*:･°❀⋆.ೃ࿔《✽✽✽⋆⁎⋆☽♡☾⋆⁎⋆✽✽✽》°❀⋆.ೃ࿔*:･°❀⋆.ೃ࿔

Paring: Senku x reader

Can be found on

Ao3

Quotev

Chapter 5: King of the Stone world, Shishio Tsukasa

summery: after days of experimenting the revival fluid is made. Taiju and Senku went to revive yuzuriha while you stayed behind to clean up. You should've went with them.

Word count: 3874

Warning: not proofread, and senku's pov isnt cute <\3

°❀⋆.ೃ࿔*:･°❀⋆.ೃ࿔《✽✽✽⋆⁎⋆☽♡☾⋆⁎⋆✽✽✽》°❀⋆.ೃ࿔*:･°❀⋆.ೃ࿔

Taiju and Senku were standing around the contraption that Senku made a few weeks ago when waiting for the wine to ferment. I stayed at the top of the house, near the ladder, as I didn’t trust that thing to stay intact. After all it was Senku who made it, and his luck is usually in the negatives.

It did in fact break while Senku explained its origin in mesopotamia. It had gotten all over him, his hair included.

“Oh my god are you ok” I was trying to sound concerned but I was just laughing inside. I grabbed some extra deer skin that we were not using and wiped the wine from Senku’s face and then blotted it to get any excessed wine off of him.

“I’ll be fine” He forced a smile. I knew he was lying

“Don't lie to me” I quickly stripped him from his clothes as more time passes the more the wine will stain the deer skin.

“I’ll go wash your clothes down at the river, you guys clean up while I'm gone.” I scurried away not waiting for a reply. It was totally not because I didn’t want to be around a naked Senku.

Washing the clothes was a pain. I would normally not clean them but knowing the boys it’d be best if I take over. Cleaning off the wine was a challenge, it was even more so because I didn’t have any soap or detergent. Not only that I didn’t have any hydrogen peroxide for a proper soak that’ll have taken most of the wine off.

After a while of painful handwashing I finally got the remains of the wine off of the skins. After twisting as much of the water out of the skins, I went back to the treehouse. While I was gone Taiju went out to collect some more grapes, and Senku cleaned up from the accident.

Taiju started a fire and then got some food cooking beside it. Senku on the other hand was getting mad at stirring the pot filled with freshly made grape juice, though he was most likely mad at the fact that he would have to wait another three weeks till we can make that nital he talked about before.

I fully took advantage of the fire and hung senku’s clothes and the deer skin that I used to blot the wine off. It took until noon the next day for them to be fully dried. I caught him once again making that strange contraption, but this time I offered to help him. He gladly accepted it.

The experimenting finally commences when Senku made that brandy wine he wanted. Since not one of us didn’t know the ratio needed for the cracks to form We ended up mixing random ratios and testing them on the petrified birds. It took a couple of days, and I could see Senku’s motivation diminish slowly. Knowing him, he would think that this hypothesis was wrong and we would have to go back to square one.

It wasn’t often that you would see him like this. Which is why I always try to help him in any way shape or form. Many would argue that I already do that, but I disagree. I’m just a simple spectator, just living through someone else’s story through my own eyes. So I’ll watch the protagonist till he needs my help, in which I’ll do anything.

The sound of rocks cracking silenced all tension around us. The feather I was experimenting on finally cracked, and the culprit was in my hand.

“Oh my gosh (y/n) You did it!” Taiju shook me. If I was a baby, I would’ve had baby shaken syndrome.

“Do you remember the ratio, doll?” Senku asked. I gave him a smile in response, that was all that was needed. He asked me to make some more and we’ll all meet outside. It was weird since we were already in the shack, but I didn’t question it as Senku was acting a bit weird.

I did as I was told and I met him and Taiju outside surrounding a petrified bird. Senku asked me to pour it onto the bird. The slightly familiar faint sound of stone cracking silenced all of us who were anxiously awaiting to see the outcome, and to see if the first try wasn’t a fluke.

“Listen up, big oaf. Doll already knows this lesson so I keep brief so as to not bore her. Lesson one: It's not that there are things science can’t explain, not in the least” Senku started talking which caught our attention.

“There are rules behind everything that happens science is just the name for the study pain in the ass effort that goes into finding out what they are”

Then the stone opened around the bird’s eye, that was the moment when we all realized that we had done it. We made a cure. All thanks to science.

The bird fully broke free and started to fly up into the sky. Then it started circling around us as if it was saying “thank you.” That moment made my heart swell and my lips curving brightly. The sound of Taiju’s signature scream of joy added to the moment.I looked around for Senku who went to sit down.

“Are you ok there genius, you seem a little lonely” I sat beside him

“Couldn’t be any better, doll” He replied. “It just took us a little over a year, it didn’t take as long as I’d imagine”

I looked at him and smiled. He didn’t get to see it as he looked up into the sky, probably watching the bird. Decided to change my mind and place my head down onto his shoulder. “Slow and steady wins the race, no?”

“yeah…I'm gonna beat fantasy with science as my only weapon. So get excited.” I just hummed in acknowledgement, still smiling.

I know Senku isn’t the type of person to lie about things, so unless he changed or he doesn’t know, I know for a fact that he would tell the truth a hundred percent of the time. So when I looked at the both of them, happily content in their own bubble, I made my final conclusion.

Senku definitely likes (y/n). I just hope he lets me be his best man at their wedding like how I'm gonna have him be mine on my wedding day.

Taiju came up to us, eagerly awaiting to ask his question: “So who are we bringing back first?”

“We’ll we’re gonna bring back everyone sooner or later, so it doesn't matter much on who is first but-”

“But I think we know who's first” I finished his sentence. Zuri, My best friend. The guiding lamp in a world full of chaos(the Boys). I can’t wait to hug and talk to her again. But first I had to clean up.

It was my least favorite thing but someone has to do it, and it sure ain't the girl who just revived or the boys who’ll probably misplace things. So I offered to stay behind while those two go ahead.

“Are you sure (y/n) I know you're dying to see her again!” Taiju tried to convince me to come.

“No I can’t have Zuri come back and see this mess, but you have better things to worry about like your confession” I tried to turn Taiju around but failed.

“You sure about staying here Doll. You’ll be all alone, and besides Im sure Yuzuriha wouldn’t mind”

“I'm sure now go! The more time you two waste the more Zuri has to wait!” I turned Senku around which was much easier.

Thankfully they finally listened and started walking towards the tree that protected Zuri. I wished them one final good luck before they fully disappeared from my sight. Once I couldn’t see them, I headed back to the shack and cleaned up.

Moved the petrified birds on the shelves, moved the used pots to the side for washing, and sealed off the rest of the wine so no bugs could get inside. I whipped off the tables with a damp deer skin that became our towel.

Then I moved onto the outside. All I really needed to do was organize and move things around so it wouldn’t seem all scattered like. Once I moved inside the house to clean it up a bit, it has been about two hours since the boys went off.

Unfortunately for me, they’re two hours away from me and an important item that I had forgotten to send them off with….Zuri’s clothes

“Damn it” I cursed out loud.

Lets just hope they have the decency to just bring her back and then revive her, or just make her temporary clothes till they come back.

“Good luck! Come back safely!” I heard her yell.

“I don't know why (y/n) didn’t want to come with us. I mean she cares for Yuzuriha just as much as I do, right Senku” Taiju started questioning her actions.

I don't blame him, not even a single percent. It's easy to figure out a person’s next course of action or even their thoughts from their personality or past actions. But Doll has always thrown me for a loop. Whenever I think she’ll do something, she’ll end up doing the complete opposite. It makes me laugh, though it sometimes infuriates me.

“We can’t dictate what our Doll thinks or what she does so it's best if we don't dwell on it”

That thankfully shut him up for now. Lately he's been more talkative than usual. It all started with my remark in the cave, and ever since then he hasn’t been letting it go. He's been staring at (y/n) and I for the past month or two. It was so obvious that it's almost as if he's trying to prove a point.

I wasn’t wrong nor out of pocket, and besides I've made the worst remarks around (y/n) and she would always play into it. Though lately she’s been acting strangely. She's been running away more, wanting to be by herself, and a bit more protective in a way. If I knew any better her mood swings are due to puberty, but she's already passed that.

“Senku” Taiju spoke seriously. “Tell me the truth, do you or do you not like (y/n) that way”

“You still onto that” I scratch my ear, “I obviously like her if I didn’t I wouldn’t have put up with her”

“NO NOT LIKE THAT! I mean you guys act differently with each other compared to when you act with other people!”

Similarly like in the cave he once again went on and on about my relationship with (y/n).“AND WHAT THE HECK! HOW DO YOU EXPLAIN THAT MOMENT EARLIER”

I was thinking back to earlier moments of today. I figured that he was talking about when (y/n) placed her head on my shoulder. It wasn’t anything that important. I knew she was tired, tired of all the experimenting and tired of surviving in a hardcore world. Heck I don't think she ever played minecraft without being in creative mode and building her house first before she actually starts playing.

“She was just tired you big oaf”

“Yeah I know but why did you let her rest on your shoulder, you don't like physical touch, and yet she's always the exception!” He started yelling which bothered all the birds around us. “Even when we were kids you’d let her rest on you.” He paused trying to make the next part dramatic.

“Till you confront your feelings about (y/n) I'm not going to back down! I'll make you realize them even if it takes a century!”

I just chucked in response. It’ll take him more than a century since I don't like her.

It didn’t take long until Taiju and I walked up to the tree where Yuzuriha was encased. The tree protected her body from erosion, and the unique looking headband that (y/n) gifted her also still was intact on her head.

“Alright, I'm ready. It's go time! Let's pour that miracle water! It's gonna turn her back right!” Taiju asked excitedly

“Yeah, I believe that it will. I tried it on a piece of broken stone and it turned into a hunk of dead flesh” I chuckled maniacally, remembering the face when (y/n) saw what I did. It looked like a mixture of horrified, scared, and grossed out. She took the bottle away from me and forbid that I would experiment on petrified people unless they’re whole.

“Try and have a little respect for the dead would you?!” Taiju scolded me.

“I did make the effort to put them back together at first, obviously but it seems that once someone has died reviving them is not an option, I value their sacrifice, and Doll has already prayed for them, perhaps you too should follow suit.”

He gasped, realized that I had a point, and then started praying for them so fast that I thought he was casting a spell. Once that was done he turned around and started pulling the branches away from her. I tried to pass him the miracle fluid since I figured that he would like to do that. But instead of taking the bottle he turned around and started yelling.

“Hold on Senku! She’s naked! Don't look at her” He was so fast that I didn't have enough time to dodge. He poked both of my eyes and went on something about how inappropriate it is to wake her up without clothes. I tried to give the same reasoning as I did with (y/n).

“I know it's tough but would it kill you to try to use some logic for once?! There's absolutely no one to care if your butts showing or even if your dick’s hanging out”

“Yuzuriha does not have a dick!” a point completely missed but reminded me of a similar answer that was given to me.

“I care about this you stupid genius!” she yelled at me from behind the treehouse’s doors, “I'm a modern person, so I don't want my butt, dick, or chest showing!”

(y/n)’s first day in the new world was rough. But she adapted quickly, it was a trait that I admired. Even back in the modern world.

“We need to take her back to camp and get some clothes on her first” Taiju lifted Yuzuriha on his shoulder as if she weighed nothing.

“Okay but how heavy is that statue anyway?” I genuinely asked. Camp wasn't that far but walking that distance with a statue could be too much for someone.

“You’d better not be calling her fat!”

“Way to completely miss the point again, what I mean is that it would be ten billion percent efficient if we woke her up and have her walk there with us. man I can’t deal with this illogical thinking” I muttered.

The sound of a growl coming from the forest made me turn around. “Hey wait, you big oaf!”

A lion appeared from the trees.

“Why is there a lion walking around japan!” Taiju yelled while running

The answer was obvious. It was a descendant from a zoo animal that escaped when there were no more humans to maintain them or to keep them in check. Because of that all the herbivores were likely on the menu. Not only that once it got out to the city it was a pet buffet.

“They are now literally the king of beasts, so we mustened forget that: humans are not the top of the food chain anymore” I wasn”t sure if he gotten the gist of that, but we had no time. We were coming onto a cliff with no choice but to jump. We survived thanks to the tree vines that took most of the fall but it still was still a pain in the ass. We didn’t have time to rest; however, since the lions were still chasing us.

“Why haven't they actually killed us” Taiju spoke with Yuzuriha still in his arms

I chuckled, “They probably have never seen bipods before. I bet we look creepy as hell to them, running on two legs”

“Yeah we are the only humans in the world”

“We definitely spooked them, but they’ll go in for the kill soon even if we get super lucky and make it back to camp, all we got to fight them are spears, Doll may stand a chance since she’s beaten a hundred men once in a fight before. But beasts are different from humans” I explained.

It was game over from the moment it first saw us. “Good luck! Come back safely!” Her voice echoed in my head. I'm sorry Doll but I don't think we will be able to come back safely.

Taiju stopped running and threw Yuzuriha’s statue at me and told me to run. He was willing to sacrifice himself and become lion food. Using some dumb logic that I was humanity’s last hope. It's was only partially true, but Taiju’s brawn is just as important. Humanity needs both of us in order to survive, and I can’t stand to think (y/n)’s tears over Taiju’s bead body.

“If humanity is gonna live on then the three both of us need to survive” I yelled at him. “If we’re gonna make a run for it then it's imperative that we do it together!”

“Yeah! I got it!” He looked back, grabbed Yuzuriha and we started running again. He may be an athlete and strong as an ox, but he's not a fighter. That fact has remained since we were kids, and still continues to be true as we grow.

“Hey if we can’t outrun them then there is something we can do instead” He started deviating from the path back to the camp. He led us to another tree where a bulky guy sat under.

“I found this guy earlier, we have called “the strongest primate highschooler” Shishio Tsukasa.” The title reminded me of something in the past.

He placed Yuzuriha’s body against the tree and started apologizing for not being able to revive at this time. It was taking too much time.

“Don't waste your breath, and let's just pour it on him” I took out the bottle that was originally for Yuzuriha and poured it on him.

The sound of a lion's growl cut through the suspense of the revival fluid’s function. The lions surrounded us, with no choice but to take out the axe I was carrying.

“This is it” I warned Taiju, but the sound of stone cracking took our attention away from the lions. Brown eyes peaked through the stone.

“Sorry! I know this isn't what you wanna wake up to after sleeping for a few thousand years” Taiju apologized.

“What's the situation?” He replied as if he had already adapted. Which is great since there was no time to explain it over tea. “Your whole body is covered in stone. There are lions from your nine o'clock to your two.”

“Yeah ok” He spoke with a tinge of familiarity. He quickly broke free from stone as the lions charged at us.

He used the remaining stone fragments that were on his body and launched them at the lions which knocked them back a bit. Then he used his fist to punch the male lion into the tree with such force that it surprised Taiju and I. In one punch the biggest lion was dead.

The defeat of the head lion made all the others retreat. It was also the fact that Tsukasa glared at them that made them run faster.

“You can fill me with all the details later but I owe you, so I make you this promise the two of you will not be in danger again. From now on I’ll take care of all the fighting.” He glanced back at us, which riled up Taiju.

“You hear that Senku, we had brains, brawn, and talent, but now we’ve also got brute force on the team! We’re just like the four musketeers!” Taiju cheered. But I thought differently.

“I got a feeling that our new guy may be a little bit too strong.”

“How could that be a bad thing like don't we need that kind of help.” He obviously missed the point again.

“What if it turns out that he’s actually some evil homicidal, sex-crazed, wannabe tyrant?” I explained further, “dude’s overpowered, he just killed a lion with his bare hands. We’ve only seen that happen once, remember?” I was hinting to when we first saw (y/n) brother. Daniel (l/n), he had a pretty face that attracted men and women alike. It was something that (y/n) was often jealous of.

When I first met the man he defeated over six hundred men that were twice his age. Because of that he was often revered as “The strongest man in existence.”

Then it hit me, “The Strongest Primate Highschooler” was a title he was meant to receive before he turned it down. I brought my attention back to explaining the circumstances to Taiju.

“Not only that, in a world where guns have not been invested he’s ten billion percent unstoppable”

I let my words carry into Taiju’s head. He’s probably thinking about Tukasa on a throne with women beside him and him telling Yuzuriha to come with him.

“Oh no way we can’t let that happen!”

“Hey guys do you have anything I could use to butcher this with? A knife or at least something sharp if that's all we got” We heard Tsukasa speak from where the lion laid.

“Are you thinking of eating that thing that's nasty!” If (y/n) were here then she would’ve explained that lion mean is not poisonous. But rather it's super tough, reeks of ammonia, and that it tastes bad. but alas I had to explain that.

“When the hell did you eat a lion?!”

“When I was in Africa doing research on Ebola, Doll was there”

“What kind of highschool kid are you?! And why was (y/n) there”

“Did you say (y/n)?” Tsukasa suddenly asked

“Yeah why”

“Nevermind, it might not be the same person” He evaded to the topic of the lion. “Although it was attacking us, I took this noble creatures’s life, so I want to give back to the circle of life by putting all of it to use…I owe it that much”

Taiju screamed once again, completely convinced with his speech. But for me it doesn’t move me one millimeter.

“Come on we’ll lead you back to our camp, its time to introduce to you our, Doll”

“Doll?” Tsukasa questioned

“It's a nickname for the girl he likes” Taiju butted it

“For the last time you big oaf I don't like her like that!”

“I told you before i'm not going to stop till you realize your feelings for her”

“What did I get myself into?” The long brown haired man thought while staring in disbelief of his saviors.

Next>

#dr stone #dr stone senku #fanfic #ishigami senku #senku #senku x reader #senku x y/n #senku ishigami x reader #dcst #dcst senku #dcst tsukasa #dcst taiju #tsukasa shishio #dr stone taiju #taiju oki #drst #dr stone x reader #dr stone x y/n

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hunters-vigil · 5 months ago

Text

Marry Me - Mavuika x fem!Reader

request: if you're accepting requests, could i request a fic where mavuika is planning to propose to her very shy gf, but her gf ends up unexpectedly proposing first? thank you!

A/n: this request gave me a lot of happy thoughts, it's also vague enough that you could read it through the lens of a modern!AU if you wanted to. Not sure if I made the reader shy enough but definitely flusters easily and can succumb to peer pressure... not to be associated with any writing from The Archon's Baby universe. Enjoy<3 happy early valentines to anyone who reads this...

Fic under the cut, don't repost my stuff on other platforms, i have ao3. Reader is not the traveller.

She had been planning this for a while now, sneakily gathering all the details she needed to make her proposal to you perfect. She knew you weren't one for the spotlight, so a proposal in front of everyone would no doubt leave you uncomfortable...

It needed to be private, it needed to be perfect, if it all went well... you will say yes, and you would be granting Mavuika the honour of marrying her...

But there were still some things she needed to arrange. Commissioning a ring from Xilonen, she had drawn up designs down to the most specific details, and getting your ring size had been...

It had taken Mavuika a couple of attempts to get your ring size, unable to get anyone to help or distract you for her to get it undetected, but her attempt to find your rings had fallen flat, finding that you were wearing them instead. Another option was to try with her own rings, while some were designed to fit over her gloves, Mavuika had others that would work.

"Is there something wrong? You're... staring at my hands? They're clean, I swear-" you could feel embarassment tingle in your bones as you tried to continue eating dinner, but Mavuika's gaze had been locked on you for a while now.

"No, no, it's not that, I just- is that one new?" Mavuika gestured to a random accessory that didn't seem super familiar to her.

"Hm, oh, it was a birthday present, I found it in some stuff... is there something wrong with your magmic ode?" you changed the subject quickly, noticing how Mavuika's favourite dish was currently still intact.

"Ah, I was distracted by your beauty," Mavuika's tone turned playful as you began to shy away, mumbling to eat her dinner. Gods above, Mavuika adored you.

She decided to try get your ring size while you were sleeping, but her first attempt at that didn't go well. She could recall it with ease, shaking her head at the memory.

Mavuika had rolled onto her side, believing you to be asleep as she woke up just before she needed to get up to begin her day. Her tasks were never-ending, but she loved any and all time she could spend with you.

"Oh-" the noise escaped her lips before she could help it, realising you were looking right at her with a soft smile, leaning in to press a quick kiss to her lips.

"Good morning..." you whispered, nuzzling closer as Mavuika let herself dissolve into your embrace. Her plan would need to wait for another time.

Her next attempt wasn't as perfect as Mavuika wanted it to be. The piece of string had gone easily around your finger as you slept, your deep breaths coaxing Mavuika into a sense of security. You hadn't woken up yet at least, carefully taking the string to try for the measurement, but she only could frown to herself. This wasn't super accurate, for her liking, or for Xilonen to create an accurately sized piece.

Her third attempt was the one she was the most confident in, although Xilonen would most likely give her some grief over it. Four words. Multiple pieces of string. A bigger sample size would mean more possible validity when it came to the accuracy of measuring your ring size, right?

"Mavuika, seriously? Did you think to just ask for her ring size?"

"But then she would know what I'm doing, Xilonen. How can I surprise her with a proposal if she knows I'm planning on proposing?" Mavuika grumbled, standing in Xilonen's workshop as the smith went over the plans' details.

"You've put a lot of detail into this... just how long have you been planning to propose?"

"You'd be surprised." Mavuika replied ominously, but Xilonen only eyed something off to the side carefully when Mavuika wasn't looking.

"I doubt that..." Xilonen muttered under her breath, only hoping that you wouldn't turn up early to pick up your commissioned piece.

"Is something wrong?"

"Well, your timing could be better-" her ears twitched, hearing Nepecha happily talking to someone outside of her workshop, quickly rolling up the plans Mavuika had given her and grabbing an old one of Mavuika's sunglasses.

"Xilonen?" Mavuika raised an eyebrow, before turning her head, spotting Nepecha run through the door with her hand in yours, "uh-"

"Hey, I came to pick up that commission, but it can wait, you're clearly busy," giving Mavuika a quick grin, you nodded to Xilonen, who understood seamlessly, "Nepecha, come on, I'll play with you outside if you want?"

"Yeah, sounds good, I'll wrap up with Mavuika quickly. But, actually, Nepecha's been wanting to show you a piece she helped me with in the forge, so why don't you two run along while I deal with Mavuika, and her ability to break the unbreakable." Xilonen held your gaze for a moment, before looking to Nepecha, who gently tugged on your hand to lead you outside again.

"Nice save." Mavuika let out a breath of relief, unaware that she was not the only one who had needed saving.

It was only after Mavuika left, hopping on her bike to go talk to Iansan that you headed inside with Nepecha following you.

"Thanks for that. I knew she had broken some of her sunglasses, but I thought she already had them fixed by you." You let out a nervous chuckle, watching as Xilonen grumbled under her breath about Mavuika, before heading over to where she had finished your commission.

"It's all there, your design was nearly impeccable, just keep it hidden until you want to give it to her. Any ideas or plans for that?" Xilonen stated, opening the box to reveal the ring to you, a warmth in her chest developing as she saw your eyes light up.

"Thank you so much for this, it means a lot to me." You grinned brightly, carefully showing Nepecha the ring as she stood on her tip-toes to look, "and everything else is sorted, I just needed this and the final piece of the puzzle."

"What's the final piece?" Nepecha inquisitively asked, Xilonen gently kneading her ears with a soft smile.

"Mavuika is the final piece." You felt your cheeks warm up, knowing what you needed to do, but Mavuika's schedule could be unpredictable sometimes, and coordiating everything had taken some work.

Chasca had helped you scout out the perfect spot, and you had already spoken to Chanca at Zakan's Street Bites for advice on foods too... now you had the ring. All you needed to do was bring everything together, and bring Mavuika into the equation. Hopefully, the end result would be her saying yes.

///

Meanwhile, Mavuika had arrived at the beach to scout out locations with Iansan, Mualani being quick to join them.

"Of course, depending on the time of day you want to do this, you have to take into account where the tide will be, and the day itself, especially the weather, so, when are you planning on popping the big question?" Mualani rambled and skipped ahead, while Iansan and Mavuika followed her.

"I passed on my plans for a ring to Xilonen today, so the sooner she's done crafting it, the sooner I can ask my beloved for her hand in marriage." Mavuika explained, eyeing the beach carefully for the most perfect spot.

"She'll say yes, I have no doubts." Iansan affirmed, Mavuika grinning at the prospect, her hair almost spontaneously combusting with her excitement.

"I hope she says yes too."

///

"Thank you for helping me get everything set up... I know it's a bit more short notice than the original plan, but Mavuika was at Xilonen's today, and that sunglasses excuse was flimsy, so-"

"It's fine, don't worry about it. This is no trouble, plus Chuychu worries less about me when she knows we're hanging out. She's been saying for years that you're a good influence on me, somehow. Probably with how shy you can be."

"Anything to give your baby sister less heart attacks, hm?" you chuckled, fixing the picnic blanket down carefully, "not like we've been best friends for years or anything, Chasca. Wait, what do you mean 'somehow'?" you felt your body flare up with heat, still easily susceptible to your friends teasing you, even after knowing them for years.

"How about we focus on your proposal to Mavuika, rather than our messy childhoods? Since those will no doubt come up during the speeches anyway." Chasca shivered at the idea, while you grimaced visibly at the idea. Sitting through long speeches, all the attention on you... at least at your wedding, you could look at your wife?

"The elders know far too much about us all, don't let Citlali drink too much, okay? She always teases me when she's drink."

"You have a lot of faith in me that I can somehow stop her..." Chasca deadpanned, "Chuychu's here with the food. Want me to go track down your woman?"

"Track or hunt?" you chuckled, before your eyes widened, "track or hunt, Chasca?"

"She's going to be marrying my best friend, so-" Chasca replied, smirking until she was cut off.

"What do you mean 'your' best friend?" Chuychu pouted, having overheard as she carried the food for you and Mavuika.

"Whoah, okay, let's not start this again. Chasca, please bring Mavuika here, unharmed, and wearing something nice." You emphasised 'unharmed' as Chasca let out a playful huff that almost felt uncharacteristic of her, while Chuychu's pout disappeared the moment you turned to her, "thank you so much for bringing the food, you are a lifesaver. Mavuika was at Xilonen's today, so we're speeding up the plan."

"You're that worried?" Chuychu asked as she helped you arrange the food to keep it protected from the air until it was time.

"She had Kinich keep an eye on me earlier in the week, that was enough for me to realise she's up to something -what are you doing?" you froze as Chuychu's hand reached up to your face, staring at it in slight horror.

"Fixing your appearance, if you think I'm letting you propose with whatever that is, on your face, you are mistaken." Chuychu huffed as you tried to duck away from her hands, eventually she got to fix the issue, despite your squirming.

"Sometimes I forget who is supposed to be the older sister between you and Chasca- but then you pout like that and I see the little girl who just wanted saurian crackers so, I know it's you." You playfully pitched Chuychu's cheek as she pouted at you.

"You and Chasca are so- I can't believe I thought you were a good influence on her. You kept her quiet with your quietness." Chuychu grumbled as you let out a laugh.

"Correlation, not causation. Chasca hanging out with me meant she got into less fights, and it gave you less stress. Win, win, your parents approved of me too."

"Yet you're going to marry Mavuika." Chuychu deadpanned before shaking her head, "That's probably for the best, actually. I don't want to see you and Chasca kiss ever again. That one time at that party when we were younger was enough."

"Yeah, let's not go there... in my defense, it was Mualani's idea to play spin the bottle, then give me the puppy eyes when I tried to leave, also first kisses are awkward!" Chuychu gagged at that while you felt your body screaming to retreat into its metaphorical shell like a tortoise.

"You looked like you were ready to cry too, even if it was gross seeing my sister kiss *my* best friend, it would have been weird if it was anyone else, since we didn't even know Mavuika well enough yet."

"Speaking of, I think I can see Chasca on the horizon, so that means Mavuika is on her way here," You turned your head to acknowledge the younger girl, "you and Chasca are my best friends, you know."

"How can you see Chasca from here-Wait! So does that mean I could be your maid of honour? Or maybe a bridesmaid if you already asked Chasca, or Xilonen?" Chuychu asked, her eyes glowing with hope as you smiled shyly, opening your mouth to answer, but the incoming revving of an engine drowned out your thoughts. Mavuika was nearly here.

"How do I look? And we can talk wedding stuff as much as you want, as long as Mavuika says yes to marrying me," you hurriedly looked at Chuychu, who quickly adjusted one last thing before she hurried away to meet with Chasca nearby with a kamera in the bushes.

"You can do this!" Chuychu's exclaimation made you flinch, your face full of horror as a shaky breath escaped your lips. Slipping the box between your fingers, you checked that the ring was still there before hiding it in your pocket.

"My love? What's all this?" Mavuika looked over the set-up in front of her, biting the finger of her glove between her teeth to tug it off, followed by the other glove as you adjusted your footing, moving from one foot to the other nervously.

"Lunch?" your hand rubbed the back of your neck, your stomach trying to twist itself in knots, "I hope you've not eaten yet..."

"As a matter of fact, I haven't yet, so this is perfect timing," her sunshine eyes gazed over the foods, carefully removing the covers to see what was available, "and you got both of our favourites!"

"Of course," you felt heat creep into your cheeks, a soft smile crossing your face at the joy on Mavuika's, but the awareness that Chasca and Chuychu were nearby in the bushes, watching, had a nervousness running through you.

Did you propose now and let the food go cold, or wait and hope neither of you make a mess-

"Napkin?" Her smooth voice cut through the jaggedness of your thoughts, relief washing over you as you gave her a grateful smile, taking the napkin and gently unfolding it to lay in your lap.

"Did your conversation with Xilonen go well?" Mavuika asked nonchalantly as she covered the bowl of magmic ode, her favourite, while you moved the volcano cake, reaching for the grainfruit wraps.

Chuychu held back a sigh as she was stuck with her sister in a bush, trying not to watch you and Mavuika nearly feeding each other lunch, waiting for time to speed up so she could photograph the proposal instead.

Chasca's fingers tapped against her thigh as she waited, trying not to squirm too much even as her legs began to ache. Sitting still for so long wasn't exactly a strength of hers when having to watch something so... intimate.

You'd talked about your dates with Mavuika before, Chasca had even helped you get ready for your first one, reluctantly, since she knew how nervous you were, and worried that Mavuika would hurt you somehow.

How things had changed... unfortunately Chasca's reminiscing was cut short as Chuychu elbowed her in the ribs, gesturing to how you and Mavuika were done eating, tidied up the food, and had gotten up to observe the view better.

"Beautiful views like this... remind me that everything is worth it." Mavuika remarked quietly, her fingers brushing yours as she turned her head, catching your gaze resting on her.

"I like this view too." You chewed the inside of your cheek momentarily, your nerves getting the better of you as the weight of that little box in your pocket grew heavier.

"If only you were looking at the view, and not at me." Mavuika chuckled, squeezing your hand as you flicked your gaze away for a moment, looking back to meet her sunshine eyes.

"Well, I'm looking at the woman I'm in love with, so I think my view is even more beautiful than the view of Natlan." You stated unashamedly, a small grin on your face as Mavuika let out a nervous chuckle that felt almost uncharacteristic for her. The usually stoic woman who hid her playful side, yet somehow you were able to make her blush.

"Mavuika... I'm really glad you're here," keeping ahold of Mavuika's hands in yours, you were able to bypass the shaking of your fingers, squeezing her hands comfortingly as she gave you a soft smile in exchange. Relief flickered in your eyes as you were able to keep talking, no interruptions, no mistakes or fumbles, you were going to do this.

"I have loved every moment that I've spent with you, and I hope we can continue that going forwards, but as more than just girlfriends. Mavuika, I wondered if you would grant me the blessing of your hand in marriage, and the honour of becoming your wife?" you let go of Mavuika's hands, getting down on one knee and removing the little box with the ring from your pocket, opening it to show her.

"So that's what you've been up to," Mavuika let out a chuckle, her fingers gently hooking under your chin to look up at her, "I never predicted you would beat me to it and propose first, but yes, I would love to marry you, my love. If I could, I would marry you right here, right now, with Chasca and Chuychu as our witnesses."

Your eyes widened, turning your head to spot where Chasca and Chuychu were hiding with the kamera.

"Wow they could have picked a better bush to hide in..." you muttered to yourself, your face burning as Mavuika guided your gaze back to her, gesturing to the ring with her eyes, "ah, you said yes!"

"That I did," her face mirrored the joy on yours, as you helped her slip the ring onto her finger, "this design... it's beautiful."

"Ugh we should leave." Chasca grumbled as Mavuika pulled you in for a kiss that was lasting longer than necessary.

A yawn caught your attention as you broke away from Mavuika, turning your head to spot Xilonen in a nearby tree.

"Uh-" you raised an eyebrow, leaning into Mavuika's touch as she wrapped her arm around your waist, keeping you close.

"Xilonen, how quickly do you think you can make the ring for my fiancee?"

"Ugh, seriously? You gave me the plans this morning, while your fiancee gave me her plans weeks ago." Xilonen's eyes fluttered shut again, whether you'd accidentally picked one of her napping trees to propose near, or Xilonen went out of her way to witness your proposal... you had no idea, especially as Mavuika's eyes widened. Weeks ago? When- oh, near your anniversary...

"I sped up my plan when I realised you were up to something with Xilonen this morning. My speech probably could have been better but-"

"It was perfect, don't worry. But I still plan to propose to you in return, since you beat me to it." Mavuika's eyes lit up with a competitive fire as she made her declaration, only getting distracted as you pulled her in for another kiss.

"Told you you could do it." Chuychu interrupted, making you flinch into the kiss, hiding your face in your hands as Chasca let out a snort.

"We're leaving now, Xilonen, you coming?" Chasca looked up at where the name engraver began to move, climbing down the tree.

"Sure, sure, do you want to get some food? I know a place that does great barbecue, and alcohol." Xilonen suggested as she went to leave with Chasca and Chuychu, "congratulations you two."

"Now we're alone..." Mavuika smirked slightly, pulling you in for another kiss, "you surprised me today, I never expected you to propose first."

A hum escaped your lips as you leaned into her, "it took a lot of planning, but I'm glad it was worth it. I love you, Mavuika."

"I love you too, my fiancee." Mavuika grinned, holding you close as she looked into your eyes, "I can't wait to marry you."

#genshin x reader #mavuika x reader #genshin impact x reader #requested fic

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star-lights-up · 5 months ago

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OKAY OKAY OKAY BUT: Cherik "The Martian" AU

So I'm rereading the martian today because i am sick again, so obviously I need hard science fiction to combat the existential dread, and my brain just kept latching onto dialogue bits and going "CHERIK! MAKE IT CHERIK"

My thoughts are:

Charles and Erik were friends at one point, maybe during college, maybe at the beginning of training, IDK, at some point they had a bit of a falling out. They're civil enough to still get put on the mission together but it's well known they don't get along.

Though there was that one night, where they were both kinda drunk, and they got together......... ("We can't do this again." Erik said, angrily, in the morning. Charles left without so much as glancing at him, let alone responding.)

There's a sandstorm on sol 6, and the team is trying to evacuate (probably the first class team because that's just easy. Hank = pilot. I bet you moira is the leader lady, lewis, military trained or whatever. And everyone else is there too, but i'm on my asthma medication so I can't think clearly, so they don't get specific roles)

The radio dish comes off, impales Charles, he blows backward while unconscious (lower gravity or some shit idk physics) and crashes into Erik, who then gets hit by more debris. The thing that impaled Charles also impaled his biotelemetry reader, and Erik's got crushed on impact/by the debris, so both of them read as dead to their crew members, who have to leave or else they die too.

Erik wakes up first, since he's not actively bleeding and his suit's not impaled and loosing air. The sandstorm is over, the HAB (think space station/tent) is intact (yay!), but the MAV (think small spaceship good for like, a round trip to and from a larger vessel) is gone (fuck).

He tries to wake Charles up, but ends up dragging him back to the HAB on his own. He takes out the antenna that impaled him and sews up and bandages the cut, while Charles is semi-conscious. It's painful for now, but he'll live. Erik's exhausted, so he goes back to his own bunk and falls asleep, kinda hoping this is all a nightmare.

It's not gone in the morning. He's still stuck on mars in a glorified tent with limited resources and his least favorite person on the team.

They talk to each other, Charles thanks him for helping him, and they decide that they're just going to have to work together to get off of mars alive.

Charles = botanist, erik is the engineer (basically gonna have them split the original main guy's braincell. They already share one anyway).

Potato farming

Along the way, they kinda sorta start becoming friends again. They're relying on each other to survive, they're the only people each other can talk to... They play chess on the computers and watch Moira's awful 70's television and listen to disco that she brought along with her. They farm potatoes and jerry rig rovers and then oops, they fell asleep in the same tiny bunk watching tv together. Oops, they hugged after the potatoes germinated. Oops, they kissed in celebration when they finally made contact with NASA again.

Just like that, they've fallen into a new rhythm. They still argue a lot, but now there's also a good amount of kissing and little fleeting touches while they work together and they put their bunks together and fall asleep in each other's arms ("Do you realize," Charles says one night, Erik curled against his chest, pressing slow kisses to his collarbone, "We're the only people to have made love on a planet other than Earth?" Erik snorts softly, "NASA's not going to be hearing about that, if I can help it." "You realize that the HAB's always recording us, yes? They'll get the footage when we get back to Earth." "...Right. Huh." Erik frowns, then shrugs, "Worth it." Charles laughs.)

Erik gets stuck inside the airlock when the HAB deflates and they loose all their potatoes. Charles is in the rover and, for a while, was convinced Erik was dead. Until he saw the airlock start to roll towards the HAB, and then he started steering the rover over.

After they got the HAB back up, NASA tells them they're sending a supply probe called "Iris." (Transmission goes like this: [08:31] JPL: Keep us posted on any mechanical or electric problems. By the way, the name of the probe we're sending is Iris. Named after the Greek goddess who traveled the heavens with the speed of wind. She's also the goddess of rainbows. [08:47] LEN/XAV: Gay probe coming to save us. Got it. Erik heads back to the HAB. "Hello, darling. How's Houston?" Charles says, not turning from his soil samples or whatever the fuck he's been doing for three days. "They're sending us a pride-themed probe full of granola bars." Erik answers, shoving off his EVA suit. Charles turns to give him a quizzical, are-you-joking kind of look, then bursts out laughing upon seeing Erik's dead serious face. "Well, it's certainly fitting," He says, walking up to Erik and wrapping his arms around his neck, pulling him down for a kiss.)

Anyways. Iris doesn't make it, shit keeps going wrong, BUT eventually their team catches wind of a plan -- a risky plan, but one that could save cherik. So, without houston's permission, they pilot their ship on a course back to mars. They'll do a flyby, and if Charles and Erik can get to the site of Ares 5 and the MAV for that mission, retrofit the MAV, make it to their team's ship without dying/miscalculating and shooting off into the depths of outer space, they can get to that ship and on a course back to earth by sol 549.

They spend a bunch of time retrofitting their rovers for the trip, and so begins the classic cherik roadtrip -- martian style!! (I just want to mention that there's like no space, so just picture them cuddled up for a good night's sleep on the front bench of the rover. there. cuteness among the science).

They flip at one point. I could add details but it's been a while of me writing this and my brain is slowly dying and i'm tired so. that's it.

They make it to ares 5, they retrofit the MAV, then they do The Riskiest Space Flight of All Time. Random shit goes wrong, everyone's improvising, it pretty much seems like they're done for...

They get back to the big ship. They're safe!! (well, as safe as you can be in space.) But they get a hot shower and full meals and much more comfortable bunks (in separate rooms, technically, but Erik refuses to leave Charles's side so they end up in one bunk that first night. Usually they'd try to be a bit more discreet, but what the fuck. They've been stuck on mars. They almost just died. They deserve to fall asleep in each other's arms.)

They are HEROS back on earth. They get married almost immediately -- it seems quick to a lot of people, but they're so trauma bonded that, like, it's necessary. they go to paris on their honeymoon and get lots of free stuff. They never go to space again lol (and gladly)

THE END (fucking finally, it's 12:00 am on the dot and i've been writing this for 45 minutes.)

EDIT: some art I did for this au

EDIT: I fucking did it. I started writing it. Oops.

#cherik #charles xavier #erik lehnsherr #x men #magneto #xmen #professor x #x men movies #xmfc #cherik au #cherik fic idea #the martian #the martian au #andy weir #crack fic

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skele-bunny · 8 months ago

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Thinking about Aether and Dew baby...

This follows Calida's timeline!

CW - Pregnancy, Mentions of past Traumatic Pregnancy (but this is a fluff post!)

It's been a good few years, now. Calida now a rambunctious teenager, the ministry settled down while there's no tours for a good while. It's comfortable! The topic comes up one night, Dew settled in the bed with Aether on their day off together;

"Firefly?"

"Hm?"

"Promise you won't bite me if I ask something?" An eyebrow raise but Dew promises. "How would you feel about another baby?"

"Another?" Dewdrop sits up a little, resting more on the headboard as he grimaces some. "I dunno, Aeth... Calida's was rough as is. I had her early, and all the complications, and just the mental side of it? I'm not sure... Why?"

"Just been thinking, that's all. Maybe something in the air, all the babies I've been helping deliver with the siblings. I dunno either. Just thought, maybe, it would be nice to have tiny feet running through the den again."

Dewdrop just chews his lip and nods, eventually going into silence before going to the bathroom suddenly. Closes the door and stares at himself in the mirror for a bit, so many thoughts racing. He doesn't realize how long it's been until Aether knocks to check on him, Dew opening the door and looking up, holding his breath.

"Okay."

"Okay, what?"

"Let's have another. But on my conditions."

"What- Oh, okay! What's your conditions?" Aether can't help his tail wagging.

"We're gonna go talk to my therapist and double, triple, fucking quad check that this isn't just a breeding thing for you... A-and I only want you, or Phil, or- or just that really nice midwife you introduced me to at the Halloween party, Alexa... If... If I get pregnant again. No one else."

Aether just nods, taking Dewdrop's hand, leading him back to bed. "Those are all reasonable. I can call for an appointment in the morning. Sound fair?"

"Yeah... Sounds fair."

It's about two months worth of sessions, both privately and together, making sure that YES. They want this! Dew is mentally ready for this again, Aether isn't in some kink phase, etc. They even talk to Calida who's more than excited about a little sibling! Dewy gets off his testosterone and starts taking supplements, and circles his first heat for them to start trying. They keep everything quiet for a while, and even more months of failed attempts to conceive. It's about month four when Dew wakes Aether up, sitting on his lap with two positive pregnancy tests.

They're SO fucking excited but keep their expectations mellow. Dewdrop's health has much changed since Calida, plus they don't know if the egg will fully stay intact. Still, it is exciting for Aether to smell how fruity Dewdrop is. Constantly scenting him to see if there's any changes but also to cover the smell around the others. Every night Aether has his eyes full of stars and a gentle hand on Dew's stomach, whispering to Dewy what he sees, how small it is, but still so full of fluids and cells.

Two months, they agree to tell the others. It goes as they expect, excitement and extra affection, a ghoul pile that even Copia makes time to join.

"Have you started thinking about names or anything like that?" Sunny is laying her head on Dew's thigh, smiling SO wide.

"No, not just yet. Things can still change so we're waiting at least until near the end of the second trimester."

"Makes sense," Swiss chimes in. "Does Calida know?"

Aether is the one to laugh, leaning over. "That girl scared the birds away from how excited she got. She was the first to know."

Now, Dewdrop wouldn't trade Calida for the world. But he wishes he had this gentleness when he was expecting her. The kindness and a huge pack so that he doesn't have to strain and try to keep up, that he knew early, how accommodating everything's been. There's times he'll just hold his stomach and look in the mirror, so much deja vu of when he did it in hotel bathrooms while on tour. Speaking to Calida and telling her she was going to be the light of his life, and now he's doing it again. Just another piece for a puzzle he didn't know wasn't completed yet.

He's put on bed rest once more, too many high risks going on, and he starts eventually experiencing... Symptoms.

"What do you mean they're weird?"

"They're just fucking weird, Aether! Just, okay, tickle me."

He blinks. "You hate being tickled."

"I know! Just do it!"

He shrugs and does a little wiggle of his fingers before attacking Dew's sides and armpits. Listening to him squeal and laugh, grimacing and eventually - the TV turns on. Aether is staring at it while Dew catches his breath.

"See? Weird fucking shit! If I sneeze the lights turn on and off, when I get headaches my phone's battery dies, and like... It's so strange!"

Aether whistles a little, rubbing the back of his neck. "Oh we're so having a quint."

"Huh?"

Aether looks him dead in the eyes, but a big goofy smile. "You're having magick surges. Little bit is reacting to you, and quintessence is a hell of a thing. Starts while still in the womb, my mother in the pit had almost the same things happening. Less technology and more of like, levitation. We're having a quint!"

Dew blinks before breaking into cries. "Woah, woah! What's wrong, my love?"

"I'm gonna look like a fucking watermelon you ass-wipe!" Hitting him softly but still crying.

Poor thing isn't even six months yet, but he looks like he's eight! Mumbling about his feet hurting, his legs more swollen than normal, cravings that are insanity to even be thought of. It's when he's in the nursery, tying ribbons on the crib when he gasps at a feeling, holding his stomach... It happens again.

He doesn't even get the full trill out before Cumulus and Mountain are RAMMING into that door.

"What's wrong?!"

But, he's smiling, beckoning them over. Takes both of their hands and puts it on his bump, shushing them every time they try to ask. There's a kick and their eyes go wide, Dew just as much. It's much softer than normal kicks, but that's to be expected from the egg sack still around them.

Then, finally, a gender reveal. Expecting a tiny little girl, Aether excited as he's always been a girl dad, adjusting some of the things in the nursery to match her.

"Teddy."

"Hm?"

Dew is playing with a tiny onesie, keeping his eyes locked on it. "What do you think of the name Starshine?"

"Starshine?"

"Yeah," his thumb going over the embroidered star on the onesie. "For our daughter."

Aether hums, thinking it over a little before he nods. "Yeah... Yeah, I like that."

He makes it to full term, after an agonizing day and a half of his water being broken and no dilation. Clutching to Aether and Mountain, Alexa between his knees to help course their daughter out. Mountain's fur is sticking up from the amount of electricity from Dew holding him, then with how hot he is. There's a bit of a power surge at the final push before the lights come back. Dewdrop sobbing as he dead weights against the two, staring at the ceiling but ears completely focused on Starshine's mad cries as she's cut from the sack.

Good god they though Mountain was furry? That poor girl is gonna need haircuts WEEKLY. Aether and Dew laughing a bit as they're holding this purple blob of fur, some soft white on her belly and in her ears. Hair blonde, just like Dewdrop's.

Mountain congratulating them and helping Alexa clean up a little while the new parents again bask in the afterglow with their new daughter :3

#the band ghost #ghost band #rabrev writing #ghoul kits #dewdrop ghoul #aether ghoul #dewther #cw pregnancy

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justagalwhowrites · 1 year ago

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Yearling - Ch. 31: Warmth

You cope with the aftermath of patrol. A continuation of Yearling ch. 1-30 found on Tumblr here.

Pairing: Joel Miller x Female Reader

Warnings: Fall out from canon-typical violence. Plot points from TLOU2. No use of Y/N. Minors DNI 18+ Only

Length: 8k

A/N: Hi y'all. This does have a continuation of the spoilers from TLOU2. Again, I'm so sorry for not warning about these further in advance. If you have any questions, feel free to shoot me a DM (or you can always yell in the comments or in my asks. I don't delete things if they're not the kindest so I'll leave whatever you want to send my way up, I totally get it.) Thanks for being here ❤️

AO3 | Chapter One | Previous Chapter | Next Chapter

It shouldn’t be this hard to stay conscious when the world is ending.

You’d had the thought before, in the early days of the outbreak. When you were trying to find someplace safe and had no idea where to start, when you were just riding and riding and hoping you’d be alive to see the next morning.

But now was different. It wasn’t your life, it was Joel’s. His was so much more important than your own and the fear of losing him was keeping you awake. You’d nod off for a second - you thought, anyway - only to jerk back awake when your grip on his wrist slipped and his pulse wasn’t a constant - if weak - drumbeat below your fingers.

You weren’t quite sure how long you’d been on the floor with him. Things were fuzzy. You’d lost a lot of blood, you were familiar with that sensation now, you could identify it even as your mind was foggy. You still weren’t entirely sure what had happened. You remembered Joel screaming - you didn’t think you’d ever forget that horrific sound - and running to find him. You remembered watching as that girl swung the golf club down on his body. It wasn’t until you were already in the room, fighting for control of your gun with someone who looked like he was about Ellie’s age that you realized this was probably a mistake. You’d charged in without a plan to get backup, you were hugely outnumbered, no one knew where the fuck you were. You should have at least gone back for your horse, you were pretty sure she could have fit down here and you could have used sheer size and weight to clear the room.

But they were killing him. That’s all that could force that sound from someone, life and death, and you couldn’t risk it. If there was a chance, even a tiny one, that you could save him, you were going to take it. Even if it killed you, you were going to take it.

The threat was gone now - or you hoped it was, at least. Gatling was still on guard. You could feel how tense she was behind you, her body engaged and ready to strike. If they came back armed to the teeth before help arrived, though, you’d be finished.

Joel’s wrist, the one you’d been holding, relaxed some and you forced yourself to sit up.

“Joel?” You managed, adjusting your hold on him. His whole arm was limp now. Your heart beat faster. You released his wrist and pressed your fingers into his neck, where you liked to kiss him and feel the vital thrum of his pulse through his skin. It was faint but it was there. You adjusted yourself, propping yourself up on your elbow as your cut side screamed in pain, and you ran your fingers through his hair. You took comfort in the fact that you still could do that. While the rest of his body had been brutalized, Joel’s head was intact outside of where it looked like someone had landed a punch on his cheek near his eye, a bruise blossoming on his skin but no blood shed. It was like the girl had been saving his head for last, like she was trying to draw it out, make sure he was alive and awake while she hurt him. It turned your stomach.

“You’re OK Joel,” you held face gently in your hand. “Gonna get you out of here, get you back to Ellie. You’re OK.”

You stayed propped up like that for a while, just talking to him and running your fingers gently through his hair and feeling his breath on your skin until you were too weak to hold yourself up anymore. You collapsed alongside him then, trying to shield his body with yours as much as you could in case the people came back.

Just a little sleep. That’s all. That’s what you needed, just enough rest to be able to think straight. Then you could figure out how to get Tommy and Joel back to Jackson.

“Gatling,” you managed before you passed out. “Guard.”

You woke up to snarling.

Your head was swimming and you could feel the strength of the dog at your side, her body pressed back against you as she growled and barked. You tried to get your bearings as quickly as you could, fumbling for the rifles you’d brought to Joel’s side.

“Bambi!” You recognized Ellie’s voice. “Bambi, call off Gatling, she won’t listen to me, we can’t get close enough…”

“Gatling,” you gritted your teeth, your cut side burning and pulling as you tried to sit up. “Down.”

You felt her relax and she gave a little whine before curling up against you and giving you a lick. You managed to prop yourself up on your uninjured side, eyes fighting to focus as Ellie, Jesse, Julie and Gene came in. Ellie ran for Joel, Gatling giving a little whine as she tracked her with her eyes.

“Jesus Christ,” Gene said as he got a good look at Joel.

“He’s alive,” Ellie said, her voice cracking. “I thought…”

“I know,” you adjusted so you could see him, check on his bandages. Your side protested, damaged skin pulling painfully. “But we have to get him to the doctor, we have to move him now…”

“I don’t know that we can,” Gene knelt next to Ellie, looking Joel up and down.

You frowned.

“The fuck do you mean you don’t know.”

“I mean,” he said gently. “We need to move quick, already been here too long, and we only have so many hands. I don’t know that he can make it back to Jackson and we should focus on…”

“Fuck you,” your teeth were clenched, sweat starting at your temples from the strain of sitting upright. “We are not just gonna leave him out here…”

“If we can save you and Tommy?” Gene said. “Then that’s what we should do. That’s what he’d want.”

“Fuck you!” Ellie looked murderous. “Bambi’s right…”

“C’mon,” Julie’s hands gently enveloped your shoulders. “Let’s try to get you up…”

“I’m not going!” You wrenched yourself out of her grip and cried out in pain, a gush of blood coming from the wound at your side. “I’m not going without him, I’m not leaving him here!”

Julie’s hands were on you again but you pulled yourself free, forcing yourself to your knees.

“You’re gonna get yourself hurt,” Gene warned, moving for you, too, but you ignored him.

“Gatling!” You managed through clenched teeth. Her head sprang up. “Guard!”

She jumped to her feet and jumped between you and Gene.

“Bambi,” he said cautiously, hands up, as your dog snapped her jaws and snarled at him.

“I’m not going anywhere without him,” you were panting for breath. “You can’t make me, not with her like this. She’ll kill you and I’ll fuckin’ let her. Take him. Now.”

Gene looked back at Jesse, who was helping Tommy sit up. He just shrugged. Gene looked back to you.

“Fine,” he said. “But you gotta give us some space to work, can’t move him with her like this…”

You struggled to your feet, using Julie’s shoulder as leverage, and you limped to the wall, all but collapsing against it. Gatling stayed on you, staring Gene down, seeming to trust Julie as you leaned against her.

“She’s guardin’ me,” you said. “Won’t bother you over there. Move him. Do it.”

You watched as Gene, Jesse and Ellie got Joel off the floor and out of the room. There was a perverse spot on the ground where his body had been, his blood pooled there. There was so much of it, so much it didn’t seem like there would be any left inside of him. You remembered, suddenly, Justin on the night of the outbreak. How you’d tried to put his blood back inside of him in the hopes that it would save him. How could you save the man you loved if all his blood was on the floor?

“He’s alive?” Tommy asked from his place propped against the wall. There was a streak of blood down his face.

“He’s alive,” you said. He closed his eyes and nodded, leaning his head against the wall.

“Thank you,” he said, quietly enough that you could barely hear him. “I can’t…”

“It’s OK,” you said. “We’ll get him back. He’ll be OK. He will.”

You weren’t sure you believed it.

Jesse came back down and helped Tommy up before stopping near the door, keeping a safe distance from you and Gatling.

“We got him on a horse,” he said. “We gotta move.”

You gave him a nod and watched him get Tommy started on the stairs before you looked down at Gatling, her body drawn tight, ready to spring into action.

“Gatling. Heel.”

She looked up at you, muscle relaxing, and licked her lips.

“You’re a good girl,” you said, trying to imbue as much praise into your voice as you could manage. “You did real good.”

She wagged a little uncertainly and watched, waiting to follow you. Julie looped your arm around her shoulders while hers slipped around your waist and she helped you toward the stairs, taking it slow. You had to stop and rest once, not able to breathe, the warm gush of your blood when you pulled the air down low in your lungs making your head spin.

“Think you can make it?” Julie asked, concerned.

You nodded, wincing.

“I’ll make it,” you said. ��I know, we have to move.”

She held you a little tighter and the cold air burned your lungs when you made it outside. Joel was draped over Ares, Gene mounted up behind him. Tommy was on his own horse, blood still on his face as he stared blankly at Joel’s limp body.

“You can ride with me,” Julie said but you shook your head. You weren’t about to not be in control of a horse, not in this situation. You needed to have the power if something went wrong. You couldn’t trust anyone else to make Joel a priority if there were infected or raiders or, worst of all, the people who had attacked him to begin with. You needed to be able to move to protect him.

“I’m fine,” you said through gritted teeth, even though you knew getting on Renaissance was going to hurt something fierce. “Don’t need to be slowin’ us down any more by putting two of us on a horse.”

She went to protest but you pulled away from her and swallowed the sounds of your pain as you went to Renaissance and pulled yourself onto her. You called Gatling onto your saddle, too, and she settled there, still on high alert. You guided the horse to be alongside Gene and Joel and stared Gene down, almost daring him to fight you on it.

“I want to get everyone back,” he said gently. “But if it’s not everyone, I want as many as I can get.”

“Then let’s go,” you bit out.

The ride back to Jackson felt long, longer than it really was, you were sure. Every step Renaissance made was painful. It was hard to stay conscious when you’d lost so much blood and the pain was blinding. You were terrified that something was going to happen, that someone was going to pick now to attack people from Jackson and that you wouldn’t be strong enough to save Joel. The thought was constant and overbearing, hollowing out your chest and making your stomach clench.

By the time the walls of the city were in view, you were barely able to stay on your horse. Dina had ridden ahead to tell the doctors and the council what was happening and you were thankful for it as your head spun and vision grew spotty as you neared the gates. You were too out of it to notice that someone was there to catch you as your strength started to give out.

“Woah there!” You vaguely recognized Ryan, a guard you regularly saw when he went out on patrol, stomach turning as he lowered you to the snow. “Hey Doc! Got one here!”

“No,” you shook your head, words starting to slur. The blood on your clothes was cold against your skin. “M’fine… Joel, need to help Joel…”

“They’re getting him,” he said, looking down at you. He had a nice face, you thought. Pleasant and calming. “You got him back here, it’s OK. We’ll get you taken care of, it’s alright…”

“Joel,” you closed your eyes. At least things were warmer here. It hurt less. “Need… Joel…”

“We’ve got him,” Ryan said. His voice sounded so far away. “It’s alright, we’ve got him.”

You barely remembered nodding before you passed out.

You were warmer when you woke up.

Sound came first. It took a moment before you could open your eyes but you could hear the muffled sounds of bickering not far away. For half a moment, you thought you were in Joel’s bed. That he and Ellie were in a tiff just outside his bedroom door, going back and forth about some harebrained scheme that one of them had latched onto. You thought about pressing your face into the pillow and trying to go back to sleep, hoping that Joel would come in once one of them wore the other down. He did that sometimes when he woke up before you, bringing you a cup of tea and setting it on the nightstand before wrapping around you, pulling you into his broad chest and burying his face in your hair or your neck, kissing you and breathing you in until you stirred in his arms.

And then you remembered. Waking up next to Joel. Going on Patrol. The storm. The blood.

You tried to sit up before your eyes were open, side pulling and head spinning.

“Hey guys, she’s waking up!”

Your eyes had never been heavier but you forced them open anyway, already reaching and groping to figure out where you’d ended up.

The room was bright, the bed soft. It was the third time you’d managed to dodge death and awoken, confused and lightheaded, in Jackson’s clinic. The other bed was empty.

“Joel,” you started trying to get up but two small hands held you in bed and you frowned, ready to fight whoever was holding you back, but it was Savvy, her eyebrows drawn tightly together, curls springing in every direction.

“Mom, you have to be calm, you’ll rip your stitches…”

She was here. She was with you, willing to talk to you, touch you. The sound of her voice, all gentle concern, made your chest tighten. You just looked at her for a moment, seeking out the minute changes in her since you’d gotten a chance to see her - really see her - last. You thought she might be having her last growth spurt. She looked a little longer, her face a little thinner. There was a scratch on her cheek that you wanted to kiss like you did when she was little. There were tears in her eyes.

“Savvy…”

“I was so scared,” her voice cracked. “I thought you might be dead, I thought…”

“Oh honey,” you pulled her against you and held her to your chest, one arm looping around her waist, the other hand cradling her head to you, the wet of her tears on your neck. You kissed her temple and tried to keep the tears that were starting to cling to your eyelashes from falling. “It’s OK, you’re alright, I’ve got you. Don’t have to be scared, you’re OK.”

“I’ve never seen you like that,” she sniffed from her place against your skin. “You’re always so strong, you’re never hurt, not like that…”

“I know,” you said softly, rocking her gently. “I’m sorry, Honey, I wish you hadn’t seen that. I promise, I’ll do everything I can to make sure you never see it again and we can talk all about it but baby, I need to know where Joel is. Is he here? Is he OK? Is he alive?”

She sniffed and started to pull back from you as the door opened, Ellie, Tommy, Maria and Dr. Livingston coming in. They moved slowly, cautiously. Like they were worried you would startle if they behaved normally. Tommy looked washed out, Ellie exhausted, both with grim looks on their faces. Your arms went limp and Savvy sat back from you, looking between you and them.

“No,” you shook your head, a lump growing in your throat. “No, no, you’re wrong, he’s not…”

“He’s alive,” Dr. Livingston said gently. “Barely. But you got him here just in time, it was very very close while we worked on him…”

“Where is he,” you tried to get up again but Savvy held you down. “I need to see him, just for a second, please…”

“He’s still unconscious,” Dr. Livingston continued.

You frowned, looking between everyone.

“That’s bad,” you said, reading their expressions. “Why… How long has it been?”

“We’ve been back about two and a half days,” Tommy said, his arms crossed over his chest.

You nodded slowly. That made sense to you.

“He was hurt bad,” you said, looking between them again. “He lost a lot of blood…”

“He did,” Dr. Livingston said. “But… well, we’d normally expect to see more from him by now. He’s breathing on his own - we don’t have the facilities to keep him alive if he can’t - but that’s the best we can really say for him. He’s… he’s unresponsive.”

You processed what she said for a moment.

“You’re sure?”

She nodded, her mouth a thin line.

“Are you…” You had to close your eyes and focus for a second. None of this came easy or naturally. It was utterly unnatural, thinking of Joel in that way. He was so strong, so vital. He couldn’t just stop being like that. He couldn’t just fade away into nothing like that. “Are you saying he might not wake up?”

“The longer he’s like this, the more likely it becomes,” Dr. Livingston said.

“But he’s still alive,” you said, looking back toward Ellie and Tommy again, looking for that reassurance that you weren’t crazy. They knew him, they knew that he wouldn’t just disappear from his body like that. “He’s still breathing.”

“He’s alive,” she said. “But he might be brain dead, we have no way of knowing right now, no way of scanning for brain function like we did before… I’m so sorry, but you have to consider the possibility that…”

“Take me to see him,” you cut her off. She looked at Maria, worry in her eyes, like she thought you might be unstable. “Please.”

Dr. Livingston sighed.

“You’ve got a fair few fresh stitches and you’re still down plenty of blood yourself. We’ll have to take it slow.”

Ellie and Savvy helped you stand up and you could feel the wounds on your leg and stomach protesting the movement. For a moment, you thought you might be able to count the number of stitches in your skin because the way it pulled and strained. You hissed and clutched the girls’ hands, squeezing their fingers so hard that you could only hope it didn’t hurt them.

They helped you across a short hallway to a room that was almost identical to the one you’d been in, just with one fewer bed, giving people more room to work. Joel was there, flat on his back, his arms down straight at his sides over the top of the blanket. But he looked strange, unnatural.

It took you a moment to recognized the part of it that was wrong. His chest rose and fell, the worst of his injuries hidden by the quilt. He looked like he was sleeping. But it was off. He never slept like that, straight as a board with his arms at his sides in that way. It wasn’t like him, it wasn’t the way his body arranged itself when he was relaxed. Even when he wasn’t curled around you, he slept on his side or, if he was on his back, his hands were folded and resting where his chest met his stomach. He napped on the couch that way sometimes, when he was sleeping lightly, waiting for you. You could come in and press a kiss to his forehead and he would open one eye and cock a smile at you, just big enough that his cheek would dimple.

But if your lips touched him now, you knew he’d be still. He wouldn’t look at you like you made him happy just by existing. His cheek wouldn’t dimple.

You made your way to a chair near the head of the bed and lowered yourself into it slowly. His skin was pale, his face totally lax in a way that wasn’t peaceful and was, instead, like an echo.

“Oh God,” you breathed, one hand going to your lips.

“We’re doing everything we can,” Dr. Livingston said gently. “We have ways to get him fluids and nutrients but… it’s nothing long term. We’ll just have to hope he makes a turn for the better.”

You nodded, not able to stop looking at him. His body was so empty, so unlike him.

“Can I stay with him?” You asked quietly. You weren’t sure when you’d started crying but you were.

“Sure,” she said. “For now. But you need rest…”

You just nodded. You’d fight that battle when the time came.

The doctor left you with the girls, Tommy and Maria. Joel’s family and yours. All the people you had in the world in this one, small room.

“I was going to go home and get changed, take a nap…” Ellie said quietly. “Can I bring you something?”

“One of his shirts?” You asked.

“Sure,” she said. You heard the door open and she paused. “You did everything you could, Bambi. We all did.”

You nodded, not willing to argue with her.

“I think Tommy and I will get out of here for a bit, too,” Maria said. “Give you some time. We’ll be back in a few hours unless I can actually get my husband to get some real sleep…”

“He wouldn’t be sleepin’ if it were me,” Tommy said, voice sharper than you were used to hearing.

Maria sighed.

“Come on, honey,” she said. “You need rest, too.”

The room was quiet for a moment, so quiet you could hear the sound of Joel’s shallow breaths. You wanted to put your head on his chest and listen to the life inside him, reassure yourself that he was still in there somewhere, but you didn’t want to hurt him. You’d already done enough.

“Mom?” Savvy’s voice was soft. “Is it… can I stay? For a bit?”

You managed to pull your eyes away from Joel to find her, standing to the side, her arms tight over her chest.

“Of course baby,” you said, looking for another chair. She found one first, moving it to be beside yours. She settled in there, taking a deep breath and letting it out in a heavy sigh. She was looking at Joel, her face drawn. “How have you been?”

She shrugged noncommittally.

“Alright, I guess,” she said. “School is OK. Math is stupid.”

You laughed lightly once.

“Math’s not stupid but… I know what you mean. Wasn’t ever my strong suit. I liked history best. And music, of course.”

“Course,” she smiled a little. “I like Ellie and… I like staying where I have been but… I missed you. Missed home.”

You swallowed the growing lump in your throat.

“I missed you, too,” you said, voice wet. “So much. More than anything.”

She nodded slowly, not looking at you.

“I heard the doctors and some other people talking,” she said hesitantly. “What they were saying… It’s not the first time they’ve seen you hurt like this.”

You waited for a moment, to make sure she was done.

“It’s not,” you said.

She nodded again.

“How did you end up here?” She asked quietly.

“I…” You sighed and tried to find the best way to phrase it. “I’d wound up with some bad people. I got hurt. Joel found me when I was in real bad shape. He brought me here. He saved me.”

“When was that?”

“About two years ago,” you said.

“So you weren’t just here the whole time,” she said, more like a statement than a question.

“No,” you said softly. “I wasn’t.”

She nodded again. You could see her processing the information, her eyes slightly squinting as she did, so like her father used to do. It still tugged at your heart, bits and pieces of a man you’d loved still alive in his child.

“I’m still not sure how I feel,” she said, gnawing on her lower lip. “But… I don’t want to keep being mad at you. I miss you. I’d… I’d like to find a way to see you. At least some. For now.”

“I’d like that,” you said, sniffing a little. “I’d like that a lot. As much time as you want, honey, I’m here.”

“OK,” she smiled a tight lipped smile at you before looking to Joel. “Do you really think he’ll wake up?”

You sighed, looking at him, too.

“I don’t really know anything about medicine,” you said. “But… I do know Joel. And I don’t knot that there’s anything that can keep him from taking care of the people he loves. And I know he knows Ellie needs him, you need him. And I…” your voice cracked. “I need him. He’s strong. He can pull through.”

She nodded and slowly, gently, rested her head on your shoulder. You froze for a moment, not wanting to disturb her. But, eventually, you had to take a breath and she stayed there beside you, keeping vigil over the man who had become her guardian.

Savvy ended up staying until after dark. Ellie came back only about an hour and a half after she left, bringing some clothes for you. You immediately put on the shirt, pressing your nose to the collar and breathing in Joel’s scent. She told you then that Savvy hadn’t left the clinic since you’d come in, always at your bedside, nearly ripping off the doctors’ heads when they dared suggest that she go home and get some rest.

Ellie got her to go home that evening, though, after she gave you a delicate hug that, you thought, might be one of the best ones you’d ever gotten. Dr. Livingston wanted to keep you there for another few days, not something you were going to argue with since you weren’t about to leave while Joel was still there, anyway. She did make you move back to the other room and you gave up the fight quickly, waiting until you heard her leave for the night before going back across the hall, anyway. It was tricky, walking on your own when you were still healing, but you made it without any more blood leaking from you. You pulled your chair close to Joel and looked him over, tracing one finger over the soft skin of his cheek. He still looked so unnatural in this position, so unlike himself. You ran your fingers through his hair, arranging it just so, before you gently took his hands and put them at the base of his chest, one on top of the other. Not quite right, but better. It felt like his body was more his that way.

“I’m here, Joel,” you said quietly, wanting more than anything to be able to curl up in his lap. “I’m here.”

You sat on the floor next to the bed - not able to get comfortable enough in the chair to doze off - and rested your head on the mattress near his hip. This wasn’t exactly ideal, either, your stitches itching and pulling as you settled in, but you didn’t care. You had to be close to Joel. Some pain was worth that.

The next day, you were shaken awake by a frustrated Dr. Palmer who was taking over so Dr. Livingston could get some rest.

“You are bound and determined to be your own worst enemy,” she muttered, forcing you back to your own bed. She checked you over, reluctantly told you that you were healing well with no sign of infection. The second her back was turned, you were back in Joel’s room.

Ellie, Tommy and Maria came by again, all of you sitting in near silence, watching Joel, waiting for him to do something - anything - to indicate that he was still in there.

The next day was less quiet. You were in your usual position in the seat by the head of Joel’s bed when Tommy and Ellie started getting into it. It didn’t sound like a new argument and, you realized, the bickering you’d been only vaguely aware of as you regained consciousness was probably them.

“I’m not going to sit around here and fucking wait forever,” Ellie snapped. “I’m going out there, I’m going to find them and I’m going to kill every last fucking one of them.”

“We need to wait,” Tommy said, voice strained. Ellie didn’t seem to care.

“Wait for them to get further and further away?” She snapped. “Wait for them to come back with more people? No, it’s too big of a fucking risk. I’m going out there.”

“Need to wait until I can go with you,” Tommy snapped. “Need to wait until we know…”

Tommy’s voice trailed off.

“Until we know what?” Ellie demanded. “Until we know whether or not they successfully murdered him? No, fuck that, I’m going to beat the shit out of her with a goddamn golf club, make her fucking feel it…”

“No, you won’t,” you cut her off.

“I won’t?” She asked, brows raised, almost daring you to argue with her. “You’re not my fucking mom, Bambi, you don’t get to tell me what the fuck I do or don’t get to do.”

“You ever killed anyone, kid?” You asked, chin resting on your fist as you watched her. She just blinked at you for a moment. “And I mean people. Real people, not infected.”

“Yeah,” she said, though her voice was less sharp. “Yeah, I have. Two.”

“Alright,” you replied. “You torture them? You like killing them?”

She was silent and just looked at her feet.

“That’s what I thought,” you looked back to Joel. “You’re not going after shit, kid…”

“I’m not a fucking kid!”

“You’re his kid,” you shot her a glare before looking back at Joel. “And he wouldn’t want you murdering and torturing people for him.”

“But…”

“No,” you said. “If… If he… If someone needs to handle it, it will be me and Tommy. We can take them and we can make it hurt. You’ll stay here. Not gonna just let you turn into a killer for him, he’d never forgive me. He’d never forgive either of us. One of the last things he said to me was to look out for you and you better goddamn well believe that’s exactly what I’m gonna do. You’re not going any damn place.”

She stormed out but Savvy came that evening. She brought a deck of cards and the two of you played Go Fish like you used to when she was little. She told you Ellie was cooling off but she thought she’d be OK.

“I don’t blame her,” she said, arranging some cards in her hand. “If someone did that to you, I’d want to kill them, too.”

You looked at her for a moment.

“I wouldn’t want you to,” you said gently. She looked at you over the cards, skeptical. “I mean it. You hear that something bad happened to me, you take it and move on. Don’t hurt yourself thinking that will fix it. It would only make it worse.”

The day after that, Ellie brought you your guitar. It made Dr. Palmer look nervous but you promised to take it easy and that music was how you relaxed.

“Just don’t get all worked up and play Freebird,” she muttered, leaving you alone with Joel and your instrument.

“Why is everyone so obsessed with Freebird?” You asked a silent Joel as you delicately arranged the guitar on your lap, dodging the stitches in your stomach and leg as you did. “There’s better shit out there…”

You played for him whatever came to mind. The song you’d written for him kept cropping up. So did the songs you’d played with him, slower and gentler things that you tried to pull from memory, even Take on Me because it got stuck in your head.

“Do you think he can hear me?” You asked Dr. Palmer that afternoon.

She stepped back from him and sighed for a moment, looking at you as though she were going to gauge her answer around your demeanor.

“No one knows for sure,” she said eventually. “But… if he could hear anybody, I think it would be you.”

By the end of the second day with your guitar, your whole body was sore and tired but you didn’t move to go back to your own room. Both doctors had given up on forcing you. You nearly ripped their heads off when they suggested you go to your house for a day or two, try to get some real rest. It was bad enough that they’d surrendered to your stubborn need to be where you could see Joel at all times, no longer willing to fight over what they thought was better for you.

It was quiet, dark. You weren’t entirely sure what time it was but you thought everyone in town besides those on watch were at home. You were as close to home as you got now, home could only be where Joel was. You weren’t sure how to find home without him now.

You played the song you’d written for him one more time, soft and slow, before propping the guitar against the wall and sitting delicately on the edge of the bed, careful to not disturb him. You adjusted his arms a bit, putting them where you knew he would rest them if he could move them on his own. You gently brushed his hair back. His patchy beard was getting long in spots and you wondered if Ellie could bring scissors and a razor the next time she came so you could trim it for him, keep it how he liked. You drew the shirt of his you wore tighter to yourself and just looked at him for a moment. He was so beautiful, even like this. You needed him so badly, needed him to be OK. You needed to be able to wake up next to him again, kiss him on your way out the door again, make love to him again. He couldn’t be gone, not now. Not like this.

“Joel,” you said softly, barely even a whisper. “I know… I know I should probably tell you that if you need to go, it’s OK, that we’ll be OK but… I don’t think I can. I don’t know how to do this without you, I don’t want to do this without you. I need you, I’m not sure I can be a real person without you. If you’re already gone then… then knowing you was one of the best things that ever happened to me and I’m thankful for every goddamn second of it. But if you’re still there, if you can hear me… I need you to come back to me, Joel. Just… please. Don’t leave me, don’t leave the girls, I just… I will do whatever you want, just stay. Just come back to me. Please.”

He was still below your touch but you leaned forward and pressed a kiss to his forehead, anyway, his skin soft and warm. A tear slipped from your eyelash and fell to his cheek but you didn’t move to wipe it away. You had the odd thought that maybe he would absorb it, that his skin would soak up your salt and your sadness and then, even if he didn’t come back, at least he’d have part of you in him when you put him in the ground. You wondered if you’d be able to join him. You slid off the bed and tucked your legs up against yourself, crossing your arms atop the mattress and resting your head there, drifting off to the sound of his breathing.

***

All Joel really knew was that he was somewhere warm and soft. Warm and soft and kinder than where he’d been before, though the memory of just before was fuzzy. He remembered you, waking up with you, being inside of you, kissing you goodbye. He remembered watching Ellie ride off with her friend for their patrol. He remembered laughing with his brother about something but didn’t remember what. Everything after that was a haze of blood and pain.

But he was warm now, somewhere that was familiar but he was having a hard time placing it. Grass and trees and a park bench that was more comfortable than it had any right to be, the sound of birds and cicadas on the air. But there were no other people. None that he could see, anyway.

He heard voices now and then. There were some he knew were familiar but he couldn’t quite place. Others he’d have known anywhere. You, Ellie, Savvy, Tommy, Maria. It was a haze, he could make out the tones and the melodies of your speech but not the words. But that was OK. He knew all of you were close and that was enough.

There was music, too. He would have recognized your playing from anywhere but it still seemed so obvious from wherever he was. But your music sounded sad, some kind of longing in it that wasn’t there when you usually played for him. He wanted to fix it, wanted to come from wherever he was and make it better. He just wasn’t sure that he could. But he kept hearing the song you made for him. That song was clearer than any other, so present he almost thought it was the version of it you’d recorded for him. But it wasn’t followed by the words he’d come to know so well in the months without you, the ones you’d added to the end of the tape that he listened to every night since you left. Every night until the one you came back to him.

Come back to me, Joel.

“Dad?”

Joel looked around for a moment, heart pounding. He knew that voice, had heard it inside his head so many times through the years. But never like this, never this close. And then Sarah was in front of him, her curls a halo around her head, skin almost glowing in the golden sun.

“Baby girl.”

He realized where he knew this place from. It was a park in Austin that he took her to all the time when she was a little girl. The skyline was at his back if he could turn to face it, a playground down the hill to the right. She’d loved the open field, though. She loved being able to just run and run and run with nothing to hold her back. He tried to make himself get to his feet but he couldn’t. She just smiled. It was warm, gentle but more knowing than he’d remembered it being. But then, maybe he’d forgotten. Because otherwise, she looked exactly the same as the last time Joel had seen her, down to the clothes. Except her purple shirt wasn’t bloodstained now, her ankle wasn’t hurt. She was whole, healthy, the way she always should have been.

“Long time no see,” she sat beside him on the bench and he was able to reach her then. He reached for her slowly, cautiously, but he didn’t need to worry. She reached back, putting her arms around his neck. He held her, close and tight. She was warm and soft but the heat wasn’t coming from her. Instead it was like she was part of the place where he was, warm like the sun. She pulled back from him before too long but left a delicate hand on his knee. He tried to memorize her, make sure he knew the precise constellations of her freckles and the way her lashes framed her eyes. She looked him over and smiled that beautiful smile of hers. “You’re getting old, old man.”

“Yeah,” he laughed a little, still not sure what to say to her. “Yeah, I know, baby girl. I know.”

“I’ve missed you,” she was still smiling but it was sadder now. “A lot.”

“I’ve missed you too,” he said, his voice wet. “So, so much. You have no idea how much…”

“I know,” she said. “I’ve seen. You’ve been through a lot, Dad. So much. I wish I could have been there, I wish I could have helped you.”

“That’s not your job…”

“I know,” she said again. “But I still wanted to.”

“How are you?” He asked. “I want to know everything, everything…”

“I’ve been good,” she smiled. “I met your friend Tess. I like her. I liked her before, too, but even more now. She’s a lot like you, I’m glad you had her.”

“How…”

“Dad, I would love to tell you everything,” she cut him off. “But we don’t have time.”

He frowned.

“No,” he shook his head. “No, we didn’t get enough time before, but we should now, we…”

“We will,” she reached out and took his hands. “Eventually. But not yet. You’ve gotten old, old man, but not old enough. You’re not supposed to be here yet. You still have a lot to do. You have people who need you, people who love you. They really, really love you, Dad. You need to go back for them. You’ve been here long enough.”

Don’t leave me.

He looked up, looking for where your voice was coming from. Sarah just smiled.

“She needs you,” she said. “And you need her.”

She was right. He could feel that in every inch of him. He wanted to be next to you, wanted the life that he could have with you that had been so close when he’d left Jackson that morning. Just you and him and your girls. He wanted it so much it hurt. But how could he leave his daughter? His baby girl, the first baby girl he’d held, the first one he’d failed. How could he leave her again?

“Baby girl, I love them, too but I can’t just leave you here alone…”

She smiled gently.

“I’m not alone, Dad. And it’s OK if I’m not your whole world anymore,” she gave his leg a squeeze. “It’s OK if you have another purpose. I want you to be happy. Her, Ellie, Savvy… they make you happy. They’re your purpose now. You deserve that. Go be happy. I’ll be here when you’re done. We’ll have time then, too. I promise.”

Just stay.

“Go be with them, Dad,” she said. “Go be happy. We’ll be together when it’s time.”

Just come back to me.

“I love you so much, Sarah,” he said, reaching out and holding her face in his hand. “So, so much.”

Please.

“I know,” she smiled. “And I love you too.”

There was a wet spot on his cheek but he wasn’t crying. He frowned, touching his skin there, a tear clinging to his finger when he pulled it away. The place he was glowed brighter. Sarah’s face was somehow further away though neither of them had moved. He could feel himself fading from here, going back to where he was before. Part of him hurt with that, clinging to Sarah so hard that it seemed as though he was going to leave that part of him behind. But the rest of him was bringing him back, desperate to get to you, be beside you. That’s where he was supposed to be. He knew that now. He was always supposed to live. He was always supposed to flinch. He was always supposed to find you.

“I’ll see you around,” she said. “Take care of yourself. Take care of them. I love you.”

“I love you, too.”

He didn’t have a chance to say goodbye.

Everything hurt.

It was sudden and sharp, the place where he was abruptly dark and cold. He wasn’t sure he could move much, every part of him impossibly heavy. But he forced his eyes open, at least. He was flat on his back and in a bed. It took him a moment to realize where, but the fact that there was medical equipment near his head narrowed it down. He heard a soft, sleepy sound and forced himself to lift his head enough to look for it. It didn’t take him long to find you there, head resting near his waist. He smiled to himself. Part of him was just relieved that he hadn’t dreamed you coming back to him, relieved that you’d want anything to do with him at all now.

He forced his arm to move, the limb unnaturally clunky, every motion pulling and tugging on damaged skin but he didn’t really care. He rested a hand on your head, smoothing your hair down, thumb brushing against your forehead. You startled and jerked awake, sitting up quickly and blinking sleep from your eyes. His hand fell to your arm when you did and looked around for a moment before your eyes fell on him, the glow of the moon on the snow illuminating your face in the dark. You frowned for a moment, your brows knitting together.

“Hey sweetheart,” Joel managed, his voice dry and cracking.

“Joel!” You scrambled to your feet, taking his hand and clinging to it as you did. “You’re here, you’re alive, you’re…”

“I’m alright, baby,” he said gently. You sank slowly onto the bed at his waist, clutching onto his hand. “You OK?”

“I’m OK,” you nodded quickly, your voice wet. “Tommy’s OK, Ellie’s OK, we’re all OK. I was so afraid, Joel. I was so afraid. I thought you were gone, I thought I lost you…”

“I know,” he winced as he reached the hand you weren’t latched onto over to cup your face. “I’m so sorry, baby. Wasn’t tryin’ to go anywhere…”

You lifted his hand to your lips and kissed his knuckles before holding his arm to your chest, clinging to it like a child does to a security blanket.

“How are you feeling?” You asked, looking him up an down. “I can go wake up a doctor and…”

“M’fine sweetheart,” he said, brushing a thumb over the arch of your cheekbone. “Don’t… don’t go anywhere, need you close. Just…” He did his best to shift himself so he wasn’t in the middle of the bed, wincing as he did. “Just be here. Let me hold you, OK?”

“I don’t want to hurt you…”

“You won’t,” he said gently. “Need to feel you. Just stay with me, baby. Please.”

You sniffed but nodded before you moved gingerly to slip into bed beside him. You lay your head gently on his chest and he wrapped an arm around your shoulders, giving you a squeeze. It took a moment but he felt you relax against him, body molding to his own. He turned his head enough to brush his lips against your forehead.

“I can’t lose you, Joel,” you said softly. “I can’t, I need you to stay.”

“I’m here, baby,” he whispered, holding you as close as he could, everywhere your body met his a welcome distraction from the pain. “Not going anywhere.”

Next Chapter

A/N: Yeah, sorry, I can't bring myself to kill Joel lol I love him too much, I need to let him have all the beautiful things he deserves to have.

Thank you so so much for being so patient with this chapter. I promise, I didn't intend to leave you hanging for weeks on end and I feel so bad that I did. Thank you for still reading and for being here. I feel like I've messed up a lot on how I've handled this fic lately - between not understanding how many folks didn't know the TLOU2 stuff and not giving proper warning and then posting that last chapter and not having this one lined up and ready to go - so thank you for not ditching me and this fic. It really does mean so much that you spend your time here with these characters.

Thank you again ❤️ Love you!

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#fanfic #joel miller x female reader #yearling #joel miller x reader #joel miller x you #joel miller x oc #tlou2 spoilers

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