#so when i was a freshman in high school we took a field trip before christmas

[every-sanji]

[waitimcomingtoo]

Interception

Pairing: Peter Parker x Best Friend!Reader

Synopsis: Flash’s pool party turns into a kissing party and Peter fears you’ll kiss someone else

Masterlist

“Hobo. Bride of hobo. Are you coming to my party Friday?” Flash said as he held up a bright orange flyer that had the details of a pool party at his house on it.

“What party?” Peter asked as he shut his locket.

“The party you weren’t invited to. Later suckers.” Flash laughed obnoxiously, flipped you both off, and then ran away. You and Peter looked at each other before shaking your heads in disbelief.

“Wow. I haven’t been called a sucker in…ever.” You realized.

“Me either. I thought it was one of those fake high school experiences that only happens in movies. Like a bully asking for your lunch money or dunking your head in a toilet.” Peter replied.

“Or making a volcano for the science fair.” You added, making Peter smile.

“Yeah. Exactly.” He said as he looked at you fondly for understanding him.

“So what are we gonna do Friday while the rest of our school goes to Flash’s super cool party?” You asked as you threw some books in your locker.

“Oh, we’re hanging out on Friday? I didn’t know that.” Peter blushed at your nonchalant invitation. You’d never hung out just the two of you before and the fact that it seemed like an obvious choice of plans for you made Peter happy.

“Well, duh. Neds definitely gonna be invited ever since him and Flash bonded over getting left behind on the field trip freshman year. We should do something.”

“Just you and me?” Peter asked with a hopeful smile.

“Yeah. It’ll be fun.” You smiled back and wondered if the thought of alone time was as exciting for you as it was for Peter.

“Maybe we can grab some ice cream and then hang out on my roof. It’s pretty nice up there once you scare the bats away.”

“I love that idea. It’s a date.” You replied without thinking. You face dropped when you realized what you called it while Peter turned bright red.

“Or whatever we want to call it.” You quickly added with a forced laugh.

“We can call it a date.” Peter shrugged, taking you by surprise. You smiled at him just as the bell rang.

“Well then it’s a date. Catch you later, P.” You squeezed Peters arm before going to your next class. Peter watched you leave with a dreamy smile on his face. This Friday, you’d finally be going on a date. Whether it was an ice cream date, a friend date, or a date date, he was just happy to be going with you.

The next day, Flash caught up to you on campus and walked with you to your next class.

“Hey, pookie. I would like to formally invite you to my pool party.” Flash said as he held out a flyer for his party.

“Really? What made you change your mind?” You laughed in surprise and took the flyer.

“I realized something and had a change of heart.” He replied.

“Oh yeah? What did you realize?”

“That inviting you gets I mean to see you in a bathing suit.” Flash said, making you laugh in shock.

“Gross. But thanks. For the invite, I mean. Not for the other thing.” You said and shoved the flyer in your backpack.

“You can bring Parker too. Since you two are dating or cousins or whatever.”

“Neither.” You chuckled. “But yeah, I’ll bring him.”

“Perf. See you Friday, my little cinnamon apple.” Flash blew you a kiss and walked away just as Peter approached you.

“What did he want?” Peter faked a laugh and hoped it hid the jealousy he felt when he saw Flash blowing you a kiss.

“Good news. Flash kindly extended the invitation to us.” You said and took the flyer out to show Peter.

“Oh, really? So we can go?” Peter asked and hoped he didn’t sound as disappointed as he felt. He could care less about a stupid party. He just wanted to be with you.

“Yeah. If you want.” You shrugged, also not really wanting to go. Your date with Peter sounded much more appealing.

“Sure. It’ll be fun.” Peter lied through a smile.

“Maybe we can still get ice cream after. Just the two of us.” You suggested, making Peters smile turn genuine.

“Yeah. If the party’s lame, we can just slip out and go on our date.” Peter said just to use the word “date” again. You smiled sheepishly and nodded your head.

“It probably will be lame. We can stay for the food and then have some real fun. Just me and you.”

“Ned will probably want to come with us, though.” Peter realized as his disappointment returned.

“Too bad.” You shrugged. “He can hang with us anytime. But he can’t come on our date.”

Peter grinned as you said everything he hoped you would. Your date was still on the table and he might even get to see you in a bikini before it. That was the only thing making either of you want to go to the party.

When Friday came, there was prep to be done. You and Peter went to your dorms after class and began to prepare for the evening ahead. Peter laid out all his swim trunks before trying them all on to see which one he could best impress you in. Meanwhile, you were looking in your floor length mirror and making an important decision.

“I’m gonna shave my entire body.” You whispered to yourself. When MJ came home from class a little while later, she found you covered neck to toe in shaving cream with a razor in your hand.

“Should I even ask?” She asked when you froze at the sound of her opening the door.

“Pool party.” You told her. “Peters gonna be there. I don’t want him to know I have body hair. He can’t see the hair on my upper thighs. He just can’t, MJ.”

“Every single person literally ever, including Peter, has body hair covering their entire body. He already knows you have hair on your thighs. Everyone does. Why do you have to do all this?” She couldn’t help but laugh as she gestured to your shaving cream covered body.

“Look, you don’t shave your armpits and that’s amazing and more power to you for not caring about society’s expectations for female body hair, but tonight, I do care. I care enough to need Peter to think I’m as sleek and slippery as an exfoliated baby dolphin covered in baby oil.”

“Fine. Give me a razor. I’ll do your back.” MJ sighed and held out her hand. You fist pumped before giving her a spare razor.

Peter was back in his room making sure he looked his best for you. He ended up in navy blue swim trunks and a fitted white T-shirt that you complimented once. He twirled around in front of his mirror and made sure everything looked right. When he was satisfied, he drenched himself in body spray, grabbed a towel, and headed to your dorm.

You rinsed off the shaving cream and put on a perfume that Peter said he liked once before changing into your bathing suit. You put your hair into two braids and threw a big shirt on over it just as Peter came knocking on your door. You gave MJ a look before throwing on a smile and opening the door.

“Hey, P. Oh, I like that shirt.” You complimented him as you leaned against your door.

“Oh, thanks.” Peter blushed even though he only wore that shirt for you. “I, uh, like your hair like that.”

“Thanks. I didn’t want the chlorine to dry it out.” You shrugged and tugged on one of your braids to draw attention to it.

“It’s cute.” Peter said in a weak voice, making your smile.

“Yeah? I’ll have to do it more often then.” You did your best to flirt. Peter laughed shyly and rubbed the back of his neck.

“You should. It looks really good on you.” He said without making eye contact. Something was most definitely in the air between you tonight and you both felt it. You touched your braid again not to draw attention to it, but to feel beneath your fingers what Peter was seeing.

“Damn. I thought the awkward friend hook up happens after the party. Should I leave?” MJ said from behind you. You hung your head in shame as Peter turned red.

“We’re leaving. Bye.” You gave her a look as you grabbed your bag and shut the door.

“Use protection! And I don’t mean sunblock.” She called after you from inside your dorm room.

“Oh my God. We need to get out of here.” You laughed in embarrassment and took Peters hand to pull him towards the elevator. Once you were in the elevator, you stood side by side and avoided eye contact since MJ had now made things awkward. You didn’t know how tonight was gonna go, but going to sleep as more than friends with Peter would be nice. Even if all that happened was a kiss, you’d be satisfied.

You and Peters hands bumped a few times as you walked to Flash’s house. You had a feeling in your gut that once you walked into this party, things were going to change. You could only hope they were changing for the better.

“Well look who it is. Frick and Frack. Welcome to my party.” Flash greeted you and Peter as you walked in through his gate. Flash’s house was naturally enormous and his pool looked like a lake. There was a water fall on one end, a diving board, and a tray of drinks going around on an inflatable table. Flash himself was in the tiniest pair of swim trunks you had ever seen. They were golden and had his name stitched across the butt, making you and Peter burst out laughing when you saw it.

“Hey Flash. Thanks for the invite.”

“My pleasure. Or, it will be once you drop that shirt.” Flash winked at you. “Anyways, hope you guys brushed your teeth before this.”

“Why?” You frowned. You had, of course, and so did Peter.

“Because this is a kissing party.” Flash said like it was obvious. Your eyebrows went up and you looked at Peter who was just as confused.

“Sorry, what? What the hell is a kissing party?” You laughed, thinking he was kidding.

“Duh. It’s a party where you kiss as a competition.” Flash rolled his eyes. “The person at the end of the party who kisses the most people wins.”

“Wins what?” Peter wondered.

“The Cuban Rizzle Crisis.” Flash shrugged. “You’re crowned Rizz Khalifa. The Rizzly Bear. You get a degree in Quantum Rizzics. You become the Rizzard of Oz. You star in Harry Potter and the Rizzoner of Azcaban. You feel me?”

There was a long, long silence as you and Peter stared at Flash. Flash’s gaze was piercing as he looked back at the two of you with no shame.

“What?” Peter said finally, making Flash roll his eyes.

“Just kiss as many people as you can and keep count.”

“But can’t multiple people win if they all kiss everyone at the party?” You pointed out.

“Not everyone plays.” Flash shrugged. “Plus, people are always coming and going. There is never a fixed amount of people here. And you can deny a kiss if you think the person is gross.”

“So you probably won’t get any kisses then.” Peter said, making you laugh.

“Suck my balls, Parker.” Flash scoffed before turning to you.

“By the way, cutie pie, that’s an open invitation.” He said with a wink.

“Hard pass.” You replied.

“All right. Let me know if you change your mind, pookie.” He winked at you again and you looked away.

“I won’t. And I don’t think I’m gonna play. I don’t really get down like that.” You told Flash. Peter internally sighed in relief. He had feared that you were gonna play and end up kissing other people while he had to watch. But luckily, you were on the same page.

“Me either.” Peter added. You looked at him in surprise before smiling.

“Fine. You two can just make out in the corner or call your grandma or something.” Flash grumbled.

“Again, not dating and not cousins.” You corrected Flash.

“Whatever. I don’t judge.” Flash held up his hands and walked away. Once you and Peter were alone again, you looked at each other and laughed.

“Kissing party? Come on. That’s not a real thing, is it?” Peter asked you.

“I think he got it from a movie or something. There’s no way people really do this. Imagine the germs. Bleh.” You stuck your tongue out and then pulled your shirt off. Peters whole world stopped as he saw you in a bathing suit for the first time since sixth grade. He didn’t realize how much he was staring until he heard you laugh uncomfortably.

“Peter? Are you still with me?” You asked and waved a hand in front of his face.

“Yeah. Sorry. I thought I saw a bug on your leg.” He lied before tugging his shirt off. You stared at him shamelessly until the shirt was over his head and then pretended you were looking somewhere else. It had slipped your mind that Peter got randomly jacked one day and he had just reminded you with a full view. You’d only ever seen his muscles through his occasional tight shirt but this was much more revealing than that. You snuck one more glance and gulped before throwing on a smile.

“Do you want to get in the water?” You asked. Being in the water mean you wouldn’t have to fight for your life trying not to stare at Peters body for a while.

“Sure.” He smiled and held out his arm. You wrapped your arm around his and walked over to the stairs of the pool.

“Ah it’s…not cold. It’s actually the perfect temperature.” You realized after bracing yourself for the cold pool water.

“Of course he has a heated pool.” Peter grumbled and walked in. You swam over to a spot near some people but also a little isolated. The people behind you were making out and once you both noticed that, you blushed.

“Wow. They’re earning points already.” You chuckled.

“I know. I wonder who’s gonna win.”

“Us. Definitely.” You joked, making Peter laugh.

“Oh, for sure. I’m already making a list in my head of all the people I’m gonna kiss.” He played along.

“Oh yeah? Who’s at the top of the list?” You asked as you swam closer to Peter. Peter looked at your lips and then into your eyes before smiling shyly.

“The list is actually just your name written a hundred times in your handwriting.” Peter joked. You smiled in shock and wrapped your arms around his neck.

“Really? Tell me more about that?” You asked. Peter gulped and wasn’t planning on telling you anything. Instead, he’d show you how he felt by finally kissing you.

But before that could happen, Brad Davis swam over and tapped your shoulder.

“Hey, Y/n. I didn’t see you come in.” He smiled.

“Oh, yeah. Peter and I just got here.” You smiled in disappointment and let go of Peter.

“Cool, cool. So, I’m sure Flash told you what kind of party this is.” Brad said, making Peters senses go off. Brad wanted a kiss and as the captain of your schools basketball team, he might get it.

“He sure did. Which is when Peter and I told him we aren’t playing.” You said through a fake laugh to dilute the uncomfortable situation.

“Oh, my bad. I came over here to kiss you but I didn’t realize you guys were dating.” Brad said apologetically. You and Peter exchanged a look and he gulped.

“We’re not dating.” Peter forced a laughed as well.

“Ohhh. Cool. So I can kiss you?” Brad asked and moved closer. Peter felt white hot jealousy in his veins and looked at you to see what you were gonna do.

“Like I said, not playing.” You laughed awkwardly and moved away from him.

“No sweat. Let me know if you change your mind.” Brad smiled at you and swam back to his friends. Peter blew out a breath he didn’t know he was holding and looked at you. You had your hands over your mouth and wide eyes.

“Oh my God. That was so awkward. I need to get out of here.” You whispered to Peter.

“Let’s go get some food.” Peter suggested. You agreed and got out of the pool together. Peter put a hand on your back and got a towel for you so you could cover yourself when you went inside.

“Uh oh, my Virgin alarm is going off.” Flash said when you and Peter walked into the kitchen where a group of your classmates were. Peter rolled his eyes as Flash walked towards the two of you with his hand flat like a metal detector.

“Beep, beep, beep. I found them. I found the virgins.” Flash gasped as he waved his hand over you and Peter.

“Knock it off, Flash.” Peter grumbled as his face flushed.

“I had to. You two are the only ones not playing.” Flash replied. Everyone looked at you and you suddenly felt insecure for not participating.

“Really? I thought you said other people weren’t playing.” You asked.

“They dipped.” Flash shrugged. “Everyone here is a part of the game. Expect for Chastity Mary and Pete the Prude over here.”

“I’ll play.” You blurted just to make everyone stop staring at you like you were a giant loser. Peter looked at you in confusion and you gave him a stressed look.

“Me too.” Peter nodded to back you up. You didn’t actually want to play, but the peer pressure had gotten to you. That and the fact that this little game might be the perfect excuse to get Peter to kiss you.

“Oh, shit. You’re really playing? In that case…” Flash closed his eyes and leaned in to kiss you with his lips puckered. You picked a strawberry off the table and shoved it in his mouth while Peter laughed.

“Guys, Neds here.” One of the boys in the kitchen gasped.

“NED! NED! NED! NED!” Everyone funneled out of the kitchen in a mob while cheering for Ned.

“Did you know Ned had a cult following?” You asked Peter.

“Kinda. He’s famous around here ever since he got them to reinstate all day breakfast in the dining hall.” Peter explained.

“That was him? Shit, I’d cheer for him too.”

“I should go say hi to him. If he had time for old friends, that is.” Peter joked.

“Y/n, over here!” One of the girls in your grade came over and took your arm. You gave Peter an apologetic look as she pulled you away.

“I’ll catch up with you later!” You told him before disappearing back outside with the girl.

It was almost an hour before you and Peter were reuniting. Now that you were in the competition, Peter could not relax. He was on high alert all night as he tried to spot you in the large crowd. He couldn’t enjoy the party because he was too busy fantasizing about the worst case scenario of you kissing all the popular boys and falling in love with one of them. After you’d been mingling in your respective friend groups for a while, you spotted each other on either side of the pools waterfall. You swam under the waterfall and stayed close to the wall so you were protected by the wall of water but not getting wet.

“There you are. I’ve been looking for you.” Peter smiled and swam to you.

“Have you?” You smiled in return and swam closer to him.

“I have. The boys started wrestling each other and I wanted to give it a go with you.” Peter joked. You laughed and swam even closer to him so that your chests were touching. A comfortable silence fell between you and the rest of the party fell away. You couldn’t really see or hear anyone outside of the waterfall so it felt like it was just the two of you.

“So have you kissed anyone yet?” Peter asked and held his breath.

“No. People keep asking me but I keep declining. I don’t think I’m winning tonight.” You clicked your tongue.

“Me either.” Peter laughed in relief.

“So you haven’t kissed anyone?”

“No. No one’s asked me.” He admitted.

“So kiss me.” You shrugged and held your breath for his response. Peter turned around and looked behind him but didn’t see anyone.

“Who are you talking to?” He asked you.

“You, you dingus.” You laughed. “I’m asking you.”

“You want to kiss me?” Peter asked in disbelief and pointed to himself. You nodded your head and Peter felt a panic rise in his chest.

“N-no.” Peter weakly stammered.

“No?” You asked as your eyebrows went up.

“Sorry. No, thank you. Is what I meant.” Peter corrected himself.

“Oh. Right. Sorry.” You laughed awkwardly and swam back a little.

“Just because-“

“No, it’s totally cool.” You cut him off. “You don’t have to explain anything to me.”

“I just-“

“I’m gonna go get a drink. See you later?” You smiled at him and quickly swam away. Peter was frozen under the waterfall as he processed what happened. Suddenly, Ned burst under the waterfall with urgency.

“Dude! What the hell was that?” He asked and swam to Peter.

“I panicked! I didn’t think she was gonna ask me that!” Peter whispered harshly.

“Why wouldn’t she? This is a kissing party!”

“Kissing parties aren’t real! That’s not a thing that exists. This is a made up concept. Think of the germs! You haven’t thought of the germs you bitch!” Peter exclaimed. Ned jutted in his back in surprise and Peter felt bad.

“Why are you yelling at me?” Ned whispered.

“Because I just blew my chances with Y/n and I’m angry!” Peter whispered back.

“Well why didn’t you kiss her?”

“Because.” Peter whined. “I don’t want our first kiss to be because of this gross game. I wanted it to be because we wanted it.”

“Dude, she hasn’t kissed a single person tonight. You’re the only one she asked.” Ned pointed out.

“Your tone makes me think you’re leading me to a profound conclusion.”

“Clearly she only agreed to play so she could kiss you. That’s why she’s been saying no to everyone else but asked you. She’s not playing the game. She just wanted to kiss you.” Ned said and smacked Peters chest.

“No. That would mean she likes me. And there’s no way she likes me.” Peter insisted.

“Then why would she agree to play this game if she was gonna say no to everyone but you?”

“Because she’s a silly goose? I don’t know. I don’t have all the answers, Ned. Maybe she was just being a silly little guy.”

“Dude, she’s likes you.” Ned groaned. “And she just shot her shot. And you shot her down.”

“That’s way too many shots.” Peter whispered in fear that Ned was right.

“You need to go smooch that girl before you lose her forever.” Ned told him.

“Oh God. Do you think that will happen? Do you think she’ll kiss somebody else?” Peter gulped and chewed his nails.

“Probably. If I’m right about her liking you, that means she just got rejected and is probably super hurt and embarrassed. She’ll be looking for someone to distract her and remind her that she’s desirable. Plus, I heard Brad and Flash are tied and Y/n is the only girl they haven’t kissed. If they get to her before you do, you’re done.”

“Oh God. I can’t let that happen.”

“You might be a little late for that. Turn around.” Ned looked guilty as he pointed over Peters shoulder. Peter turned to see you and Flash sitting on the edge of the pool together. You were laughing at something he was saying, making Peters stomach drop.

“Oh no! She can’t kiss Flash. I’ve never seen him apply chapstick once in his life. And he licked the back of the bus seat in fifth grade during a game of Truth or Dare so he’s definitely carrying some sort of disease.”

“I remember that. He picked truth and then randomly licked the seat top to bottom.” Ned recalled.

“She can’t kiss that mouth. He has cooties. He can’t give my beloved cooties.” Peter said as determination filled his body.

“You need to do that think football players do when they catch the ball that was thrown at a different player.” Ned told him.

“Interception?”

“No. That’s the show about sitting down your family member who has an addiction and sending them to rehab.” Ned waved his hand.

“That’s Intervention.”

“No, Intervention is the Tom Cruise movie where he goes to space and his daughter is Renesmee from Twilight.”

“For starters, I’m not really sure why you called her Renesmee “from Twilight” as if there is any other character in any other movie with that name, but you also just described the movie Intersteller. Which is with Matthew McConaughey, not Tom Cruise.” Peter corrected him.

“So what movie am I thinking of?” Ned wondered.

“Fuck if I know. I’ll be right back.” Peter said and swam over to you and Flash. He saw Flash starting to lean in and in a panic, grabbed a beach ball and threw it at him.

“Ow. What was that?” Flash looked around once the ball hit him in the head.

“Hey guys. What’s going on?” Peter smoothly slid into the convo.

“Hi, Peter.” You smiled shyly and then looked back at Flash.

“It was Inception.” Ned said suddenly as he joined Peters side. Peter face palmed and you just looked confused.

“What was Inception? What did that mean?” Flash asked in genuine confusion.

“The movie I was thinking of. Inception starring Leonardo DiCaprio. That’s what you have to do to Y/n.” Ned explained. He slowly turned and realized you were sitting right there on the pool edge and smiled sheepishly.

“Oh, hey Y/n. Lovely weather we’re having, no?” Ned asked.

“What about an inception?” You playfully narrowed your eyes at Peter.

“He means interception.” Peter mumbled in embarrassment.

“Intercept what?” You asked as you slipped into the pool to be closer to Peter.

“Your kiss with Flash.” Peter admitted as he looked into your eyes. His big brown eyes were full of guilt and you couldn’t stay mad even if you wanted to.

“Ew. You thought I was gonna kiss Flash?” You laughed. “Not after what he did to that bus seat in fifth grade. No offense, Flash.”

“Was it that bad? It tasted like dry Ramen.” Flash shrugged.

“Who eats dry Ramen?” Ned asked.

“People who question the status quo and reject the suffocating confines of the shell society puts us in.” Flash stated.

“What the fuck are you ever talking about?” You whispered to yourself.

“Who knows? Did I hear Y/n wanted to kiss little old me?” Flash batted his eyelashes and pretended to tuck hair behind his ear.

“No, you didn’t.” You told him.

“Wait, so you didn’t come over here to kiss Flash?” Peter asked you.

“Ew, no. Why would you ever think that?”

“Because you wanted to forget that I rejected you.” Peter said, making your eyes widen.

“You rejected Y/n?” Flash laughed in surprise. “That is an M.Night Shamelan level twist right there. That shocked me more than that one Black Mirror episode where it turns out he was a pedofile after I spent the whole episode feeling bad for him.”

“What are you talking about now?” You whined.

“I actually know what he’s talking about.” Peter admitted. “That episode was crazy.”

“Right? When the mom was like “Kids, Kenny? You were looking at kids?” I nearly threw my phone at my TV. On God. I was rooting for him. And best believe, that is the last time I will ever root for a white man.” Flash shook his head. Everyone in the pool was looking at you guys now and trying to peer into the conversation. There was an awkward silence and even more awkward eye contact before Flash spoke again.

“So why didn’t you want to kiss Y/n?” He asked Peter.

“I was kinda also wondering that.” You admitted and looked at Peter for answers.

“Can we talk somewhere else? In private?” Peter asked you quietly.

“You’re just gonna let me hear that much of the conversation and then leave at the end? Talk about edging.” Flash scoffed.

“Fine. He can hear. In fact, everyone should hear this.” Peter decided and got up on the pool steps.

“Hey, everyone. I have an announcement.” Peter said as he cupped his hands around his mouth.

“I like Y/n. As more than a friend.” He announced as he pointed to you. You smiled in delight while everyone else gave each other the side eye.

“No one gives a shit, Parker.” A boy shouted after a long moment of silence.

“Everybody knew that.” Another girl added.

“Do a flip!” Someone shouted.

“He thinks he’s the main character or something, I swear.” Someone else muttered.

“Oh. I thought that would get a bigger reaction.” Peter frowned and walked back down into the pool to go back to you.

“You like me?” You smiled softly.

“I do. A lot.” Peter admitted with the same soft smile.

“Then why didn’t you kiss me?”

“Because I didn’t want our first kiss to be apart of this stupid game.” Peter told you. “I also wanted to be wearing underwear the first time we kissed. I guess I’m picky.”

“I’m never wearing underwear. Ever. Even when I wear jeans.” Flash said, reminding you that he was there. You turned your entire body to look at him because of how shocked you were by that statement.

“Why not?” You asked him.

“It blocks the flow of my mojo.” He said and pointed to his crotch before moving his hand it and outward flow. You blinked a few times and then turned back to Peter.

“Peter, I only played the game because I wanted to kiss one person. You.” You told him.

“That’s why I started playing. But when you came up to me and asked me, I was so caught off guard that I panicked and said no.”

“Is your guard up now?” You asked him.

“Probably not. Peter could never afford a guard. Get it? Because he’s poor.” Flash said and then laughed at his own joke. Peter rolled his eyes before looking at you again.

“If you asked me again, I’d say yes.” He told you.

“I’m not gonna ask you again. But that’s good to know.” You smiled at him, making his smile drop.

“Y/n, over here.” A girl on the other side of the pool called.

“See you around.” You waved to Peter before swimming to the girl. Peter and Flash stood there in shock as the processed what had happened.

“Dude, that was brutal.” Flash said. “That was worse than the staph infection that hospitalized me after I licked that bus seat.”

“I can’t believe she didn’t ask me.” Peter whispered in disbelief. “And who the fuck keeps saying “Y/n, over here?””

“I can’t believe you rejected her, announced to the whole party that you liked her, and then she rejected you! That’s gold, man. You can’t make this stuff up. Anyways, later loser.” Flash hopped into the pool and started to swim away. He suddenly popped up in front of Peter, this time, with goggles on this time.

“Unless you wanted to play mermaids?” Flash asked him. Peter stared at him for a minute and then nodded.

“I do, actually. Yeah.”

“Amazing. My tail is blue. What’s yours?”

“Please let me be blue.” Peter whined. “I just got rejected by my best friend.”

“Fine. I’ll be orange.” Flash rolled his eyes.

Once the party had started to fizzle out, Peter got out of the pool and went over to where he had left his stuff. You walked over to him and he tensed up.

“Hey.” You said as you approached him.

“Oh, hi.” Peter said cautiously. He had no idea what you were here for after all of the bizarre interactions you had tonight.

“Towel?” You asked and offered him a fresh towel.

“Yeah, thanks.” He accepted it and eyed you skeptically before drying off.

“You should really try to ring your hair out. Chlorine might damage those curls.” You said and nodded towards Peters hair.

“Oh, thanks.” He said and rubbed his towel all over his head. When he was finished, he noticed you staring at him with a fond smile.

“What?” He wondered.

“You missed a spot. Here, let me help.” You said and took the towel. You rubbed it all over his head to dry his hair and then moved it to reveal his face. He was blushing, like always, but had a sad look in his eyes. You let the towel fall to around his neck and then pulled it to bring him closer so you could kiss him.

“Did you really think I was gonna kiss you for the first time with Flash Thompson sitting between us?” You asked once you pulled away.

“So that’s why you didn’t ask me again?” Peter smiled as he connected the dots.

“I’m like you. I wanted it to be special.” You shrugged.

“I think it would be even more special if it happened again.” He replied. You laughed and kissed him again, which he was ready for this time.

“So.” He said once you pulled away. “You still down for that ice cream date?”

“It’s a date.” You nodded and smiled.

“I know. I literally just said that.”

“Don’t ruin the moment, P.” You warned him.

“Fine.” He smiled. “Let’s go on our date.”

Tag List 🏷️

@awesomebooklover17 @thebookwormlife @imanativeofswlondondahling

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@whatareyouhidingpeter @takenbyheartstrings @ultrunning

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[givethemsmut]

The Pack | Chapter Eight

“Her mom use to swim when she got sick. She swore by it. Every time she’s not feeling right, she swims.” Alex didn’t ever whisper and I was close enough to still hear every word.

“What about that guy?”

Dylan heard Posey’s question and sat down to listen cracking open another beer.

She told them, “They grew up together. Everyone thought they were together. Would end up married or whatever. That just never changed how she felt about sex… he was the perfect boyfriend in public but in private he was fucking everything that had two legs. We were all acting up and she was saying no to drugs, sex and a good time. It was complicated.”

Dylan was annoyed with the same info, “Complicated like how?”

Alex sat up, “She loved him but she led him on. Do you want the dirty details?”

“Yeah, I do actually. You don’t date someone you’re whole life and say no to sex.” Dylan wanted the truth to be ugly.

“Everything but pussy. You’d be surprised how long someone will hold on to the hope of scoring her. Now you get why he was so pissed off.”

I did lead him on.

We took advantage of each other.

Alex went on to explain the Big Bear ski trip his senior year and I got lost in my own memories…

In school, the two years we had high school at the same time, he’d use me as a pretend girlfriend and behind closed doors I would get to experience sex without sex. I remember one year our school did a field trip to Big Bear for Seniors, Juniors and Sophomores only. It was his last year of high school and he was already crowned king of senior year. Everyone treated us like the world’s best couple as soon as people found out I knew him pretty much since birth.

We weren’t suppose to have a room together but the senior boys had their way around the facility and I was put in the same room as Brody. At this point in our relationship we had showered together and had been fooling around since I was a Freshman. We never discussed dating or even loving each other romantically but we did immediately start fooling around because we thought that’s what you do at that age.

Up until then I was able to play pretend, let people assume, be the perfect girlfriend for everyone around us. In the privacy of my room we knew the truth. The lines were clear until now. I was so nervous and I didn’t want to blend two worlds nor let anyone else notice. All day I had to hear about the way people thought we were perfect and so cute together. I was ready for a break from the world. The first night of the trip

Brody and I went to the hot tub after hours. It finally felt normal to talk, the closeness without being forced and without people watching our every move.

I was comfortable with Brody, I took my bikini top off and his hands guided me onto his lap. We fell right into our private world that was just ours and quickly explored each other. He picked me up quickly switching positions as my arms held onto his neck. Our tongues twisted together as I felt him pull down my bottoms and pluck them out of the water. Brody had touched every inch of me before.

I whispered against his neck as he kissed mine, “Slow down.” He had been hearing this from me since we started fooling around. I could fool around but giving him my virginity was a whole new game. He was breathing heavy as his hands grasped my hips and teased my legs.

He whispered to me, “We’re on the big ski trip. We’re all alone. We’ve been fooling around for two years. What are you waiting for?” I looked up at him with my arms still around his neck, “Just not like this. A hot tub? We can do better.”

I was lying and saving face from telling him I was terrified. I was nervous, I wasn’t sure, I didn’t know how I felt about him beyond friendship and what sex would mean to him because it matter to me. I felt his fingers push inside me as I gasped and I heard him whisper as he watched me react, “Better like our room upstairs?”

I swallowed hard and knew there was only so long I could avoid this talk, “Brody, I’m scared.” His kisses were venom, poisoning my mind against my heart’s desires. He hot breath on my skin he spoke, “I’m not a virgin baby. I know how to take care of you.”

My lips couldn’t hold back the moan from his fingers, “Brody.” His hips slightly moved against my leg showing me he was hard. He knew I was close, he’d made me cum before, I gripped his biceps knowing I was climaxing. “That’s it, good girl. Ride my fingers.” He nearly smoothed out all my wrinkles with his voice.

We went back to the room and fooled around more, I blew him and he didn’t bring up penetration again. The next morning was when all hell broke loose. That was when the rumors started that I was basically a whore willing to fuck in public.

We commandeered the continental breakfast like a high school cafeteria. As I walked in and the room went silent, everyone was looking at me. Alex ran up to me shoving her phone in my face showing me a video of myself moaning against Brody in the hot tub. I wanted to curl up into a ball and disappear. I scanned the room for Brody but his best friend said he was skiing the mountain. I hid in our room all day until he was back.

The video captured it all – me taking off my top, him taking my bottoms off and what looked like Brody fucking me because his hips were moving. He almost laughed when I showed him and inquired who could have done this. He told me, “People we’re getting suspicious. The guys were asking me why we don’t kiss and shit. I had to babe. Nothing is showing.”

My blood boiled immediately, “Did you film me blowing you in our room too?! What the fuck Brody! Your leaving for college but I have two years left of being called some whore!” He tried to touch me but I pushed back. Smirking like he knew he’d get away with it, “Its me babe! Your boyfriend. No one is gonna think that! They’re just not gonna doubt we do shit now.”

I felt betrayed, exposed knowing I came on camera and now my whole school has seen. He tried to kiss down to my lips but I stood frozen as he said, “We minus well have sex now. Right?” I pushed him away and locked myself in the bathroom. I only came out later for our friend’s room party and Brody was already gone.

Once I was at the party I down as much alcohol as readily available. By the time I ran into Brody I was drunk. I pulled down his T-shirt forcing myself on him, covering his neck and jaw in kisses. His friend who were never far away started cheering for him. He was their fearless leader, king, all around Mr. Popular. His eyes looked concerned at me being drunk but he knew better then to ask that with his friends there.

Straddling him lap as he sat down on the couch I lightly suckled his skin until I made a hickey. He kissed my lips quickly, a peck, before pushed my hips down, giving us space, “Hey, it’s a party, later we can do that.” I slipped off my crop top revealing a black strapless bra underneath. Brody immediately pushed me off his lap and we both stood up as he tried to cover me with his flannel he had over his shirt. I laughed, “They’ve already seen me topless and getting off Brody so who cares.”

Brody laughed bumping firsts with his friends before telling them, “That’s my cue. She needs that vitamin D.” The room was spinning some when I threw myself on our bed. Brody slammed the door, “What the fuck was that?!” I slipped off the bed losing the flannel and my skirt before I crawled on my knees to the edge of the bed where he stood.

I touched his belt and kept my voice low, “It minus well be true Brody. They all saw.” I dragged him down to me and I could feel his hard cock against my panties as my skirt pushed up. I looked up at the ceiling as he kissed me neck and the room was as dizzy as I was. I leaned up pulling my band bra off and letting my body fall back down. Brody took the opportunity to pull his shirt off and push his jeans down leaving on boxer briefs. I watched him undress as I pushed my own panties down my legs with the most effort I have ever used. I laid there naked once again with Brody hoping for exploration without giving away the ultimate prize. We resumed kissing, our tongues hungry and eager.

His hands grabbed my breasts and hips as he positioned himself still in his underwear. He stopped holding himself above me just looking at me before I said, “What?” His head dropped to my chest before he said, “You’re drunk. I can’t do that to you.”

That was also the first night he found out I knew about the other girls. I pushed him off me covering myself with his flannel, “Can’t or won’t? Your just gonna go fuck some random call who obeys everything you say!”

He leaned back against the pillows, “What are you talking about?”

I was angry and drunk, “I know about the other girls Brody. I know you fuck around because we don’t have sex.”

He laughed trying to deny it but I had the hard hitting questions he can’t ignore, “Then why aren’t you a Virgin too Brody? When did you have sex? Why didn’t you tell me?” Brody sighed deeply, “I have sex. It’s difficult to do what we do and not get sex. I lost my virginity Freshman year when you were in 7ths grade. I never told you because I didn’t wanna hurt you.” I raided the mini bar drinking the miniature alcohol with the same punch as a full size. I sat in a chair and said, “We were suppose to do this together. Be awful together. Your my best friend Brody.” That was the night I learned about make up sex.

Brody got on his knees in front of me telling me, “I knew you wouldn’t be awful after all we did. You weren’t ever gonna be awful. I wanted to be a pro for you.” I shook my head in disagreement as he continued, “I’m not your best friend. I’m your boyfriend. Do best friends do this?”

I felt his kisses cover my legs and finally make it to my pussy. He licked, suckled and teased my clit the way he always did. I forgave him instantly, melting into the chair as I orgasmed. The next morning, our last full day in Big Bear, we got breakfast together. As soon as we walked in his group of friends stood and started clapping before Ian announced, “To the guy who got laid most all weekend!”

Brody laughed and playfully pushed Ian. Ian kept joking telling Brody while we ate, “You have a real minx on your hands here. First the hot tub and then those moans last night bro. She’s a freak!”

I looked at Brody and Ian kept talking, “Babe those tits. Supreme. I gotta thank whatever geek put your sex tape out there!”

Brody filmed us and released it, Ian was the catalyst and the student body would keep it relevant for months. Brody kept eating letting his friends praise him while degrading me and what seemed like us having sex more then once in a few days. His other friend chummed in hitting his shoulder in praise, “That’s why your so calm during games, huh? Constant relief!” I got up trying not to cry as everyone stared at me again. What did the whole student body listen outside our door for moans? Wasn’t a tape enough?

Brody got high fives while I got called a slut. It lasted for months. I was the crazy horny girlfriend that guys would wink at and girls would talk shit about.Our relationship didn’t change behind closed doors, I still wasn’t ready for him to be the one and he still pushed for more. That was his own battle he was willing to fight as long as our peers deemed him a King. Dylan stood up and put his beer down, “Enough. Fuck. I already hate him without the image of him fucking my girl in my mind.” He started taking off his pants and shoes. Next was his shirt. He sat on the edge of the pool waiting for me to notice him. I swam to him and moved between his legs. “What’s the deal with the swimming?” My heart dropped knowing it was part of my mom, “My mom got sick with cancer. She refused chemo. Instead she lived in the water. She said it always helped, like a cleanse and believed it could healed anything.”

“Shit… he was more serious then I thought, huh.” “It wasn’t. He was just a close friend. The person I navigated the world with, I knew he wasn’t a virgin and was cheating on our agreement. You dated Britt for how many years?” “I don’t like knowing some asshole pressured you for sex. I also don’t like knowing he’s seen you naked, touched you and shit.” Shifting gears, he snaked down into the pool taking me close, “Let’s not talk about him.”

“It’s not easy seeing you make out with hot red heads mister. Which is probably a good time to tell you my dad wants me to produce and direct an episode. 3 from now. I read the script…” “I haven’t even read it! Babe. That’s amazing!”

“Apparently Stiles finally has sex…” “What! Seriously? Shit.”

Posey polled his head out, “Bro just don’t fuck in the pool, okay? We’re gonna head to bed.” Dylan shouted, “Hey Posey! Did you hear us last time?”

Posey shook his head and looked down, “Dude. Just keep it down. Didn’t you two just fuck before we got burgers? Slow down.” “I’m off tomorrow. We’re gonna get drunk and fuck bro. Celebrating! My girl is gonna direct next month’s episode!” “Congrats! Let’s do shots! But have your girl put on a top. I’ll get the whiskey!”

Dylan jumped out putting the fire pit on and grabbing me one of the throws on the chair. I wrapped myself up as I sat down in one of the chairs. “We’ve been up like 24 hours now.” Dylan laughed, “That’s why I sleep the whole day after 17 hour days.” Posey gave everyone shots and we cheers to the long day. Alex was well rested and laughed at our delirium.

It was the first time I witnessed Alex and Tyler kiss. “Everyone always asks about us. What about you two?” Alex said, “What? We hang out. We have sex. I don’t think either of us want a relationship. Not everyone is hopelessly in love.”

Dylan looked at me without saying anything but I knew we weren’t fooling around or wasting our time. Posey shouted, “Never have I ever! Yes! Great way to know each other without sex. And we’re all delirious now. I’ll start, never have I ever made YouTube videos.”

Dylan and him locked eyes and Dylan drank. Dylan poured more whiskey into his shot glass, “I never had sex in high school.” Both Alex and Posey drank but it was Alex’s turn, “Never have I ever been caught having sex by my dad.” I drank with Dylan and said, “Never have I ever been drunk and high in the same night.” They all drank up but Posey went next, “Never have I ever… lost my keys.”

We all drank except Posey and Dylan went next, “Never have I ever had a girl ride me… except tonight.” Posey stood up shocked, “What the fuck! No ones rode you except her?! Damn baby!”

Dylan grabbed his own crotch, “Too big man. They complain.” They both died laughing. And we were all at least 6 shots in by now. Dylan shouted, “I dare you two to make out!”

Posey easily took the challenge as Dylan leaned over whispering, “It’s our chance. Come on.” They’re tolerance was high because I felt drunk already, “Dylan I’m a light weight!” He laughed, “Oh yeah? Do a little boxing in your off time?”

I almost crawled up the stairs, “I’m so tired and drunk. Save me.” Finally, in his room I dropped the throw I had covering me and slide into his bed. Laying on my side I felt

Dylan’s body against mine, kissing my shoulder, “You’re amazing. I’m really glad you didn’t pick him.” I turned over on my back and Dylan leaned over me while I asked him, “If we’re making love, doesn’t that mean we’re in love?”

He licked his lips, “It’s crazy. Some part of me knows I’m gonna love you.” I asked him, “Was it always making love with Britt?” He laughed, “No. God no. It was always quick, rough – like before we got burgers. We hardly saw each other because of acting.” I felt his body adjust between my legs, “It’s another world with you. I lose control. I forget everything else. The way you feel – I can’t describe it. The way you react to me.”

Leaning up to kiss his neck, my hips were moving heading him talk and he was getting hard between my legs. I whispered, “How do I feel? How do I react baby?” I felt his finger tips push into my panties rubbing me, “Like this. Already wet for me. I love that. And when you feel my tip like this when I push your panties aside your hips beg for me.” A small sigh left my lips, “Dylan.”

“Yeah? You want me to put this inside your pussy baby?” I felt his hand holding his tip and rubbing it against me. He stopped quickly taking my panties off and tossing them as he leaned down kissing me on my lips.

My legs bent our tongues touched and I felt him push inside me and I moaned. “Oh fuck.” I knew he felt good the way he pushed inside me and slowly dragged out painfully slow. I kept kissing his neck and chest. Torturous or not, he still felt like heaven. Nothing like Brody. After we climax we both laid there just talking, cuddled up like we would die if we weren’t touching. I asked him, “What is your family like?” He smiled a little thinking of them, “My dad is a camera operator. My mom teaches. Married for like 30 years. My sister is a year and a half older then me. She’s also a lesbian.”

I was shocked and didn’t know why, “Wow. Super close in age. Was that hard for your parents or they’re open minded?” Dylan pulled out his phone scrolling until he found a photo of them both, “No. My mom missed out on girly stuff but she had me.”

I asked him how he felt about the sex scenes coming up and he said, “You’ll be directing the sex. Shouldn’t I ask you?” I was already jealous which wasn’t good. That must mean I liked him more then I was willing to admit. “I’m not thrilled to see it. You’d feel the same if I had to do sex scenes.”

“Yes I wouldn’t wanna see that. My experience with Brody the ex was enough for me. I’ve never gotten into a real fight.” I knew that wouldn’t be the last time I saw him. We both grew up in LA, going to the same places. We’d been up more then 24 hours now and I felt my eyes close as I was cuddled up against Dylan.

[eepyb33]

Chapter 1

This is just a story that I'm gonna be posting gradually. None of this is based on real events, and anything that is similar or coincides with real events is a coincidence.

TW: implied sa, borderline stalking, loneliness (kinda?), non-consensual picture taking, mentions/implied abuse

This started when I was in high school, freshman year. I became friends with this girl who was a year older, and in my choir class. She called herself CG. We weren't really close until halfway through my freshman year, though.

She seemed nice enough at first. She had a nice smile, a funny way of phrasing things to make me laugh, she was sweet. She was way taller than me, but that never really bothered me unless she brought it up to poke fun at my height.

The first time I met her was a big shock to me though, despite how nice she seemed, it was strange. Within our first conversation, she told me her entire life story, from her concerning home situation, to her escape called school.

She and I were friends, in every way girls can be best friends.

I lost almost all my previous friends that year, including two people I had known for more than ten years. They pretended like everything was fine between us, but I knew it wasn't. Nothing was really fine, because why would it be?

How could it possibly be fine if they didn't talk to me for more than six months, ignore my quiet presence in the stairwell that they were the cause of?

They caused me to be alone. They caused it. I stayed in that stairwell reading to escape from that loneliness. That was my escape. CG, the one I had met in choir, seemed nice, so I turned to her. I mostly hung out with her.

It was a school friend situation where you only talked in school, not through text, and maybe calling for plans outside of school once in a blue moon.

I remember when the joke started. It was the rare time when I actually invited someone over. CG came over and we were killing time before going to the movies, she wanted to put on a show, so I let her. I remember being so tired I could hardly keep my eyes open, but I tried to watch for her.

That week I had been doing so much, and I needed a break. My mom had been the one to suggest CG coming over, and me having a sleepover with her. Mama said I was stressed, and that a girls night would make it go away. So I invited her over.

The first few minutes of the show went by fine, but then I fell asleep. I woke up maybe twenty minutes later to CG waking me up, telling me to pay attention to the show. It was obviously pretty important to her, even though I didn't really follow along with the storyline or the characters.

I fell asleep, again. By the time I woke up, it was time to go to the movies. CG was laughing over something in the car on the way there. It was pictures of me sleeping from various different angles. I thought it was funny at first. She said she'd delete it if I wanted, but I brushed it off. I thought it was a one time thing.

Then it happened again on a field trip. I fell asleep on the bus, and she took more photos. I still thought it was funny.

Then it happened, again and again and again and again.

At sleepovers with friends, all the way through sophomore year. She made a collage of these photos. I began to think it was incredibly weird at this point in time.

I was the second most pictured person in her photo's on her phone. Which was a lot of photos. She had many thousands of photo's. She had a whole album dedicated to me.

This was the point when she began to remind me of Ash- and ex-friend of mine. Ash was similar to CG in many ways, but Ash changed at a point in our friendship. And Ash took a dark turn. Ash and CG being so similar is actions should've raised a red flag in my head.

CG began holding my hand randomly, despite telling me she hated touch. CG began hugging me, and being more touchy. She began joking that we were the two gay girls that were best friends, but everyone thought was dating. I laughed it off.

Then something bad happened, and I found comfort in my new friends. My new friend group with CG. New school year, new me, new friends I guess.

I was comforted by my new friends though. They were nice, and made me feel seen. I cried and they hugged me. It was nice. About a week later, CG asked me to date. I said yes, and we only dated for a little bit before going back to just friends.

I was in a musical, and one of my friends, Tal, was running tech. It was getting closer to opening night, and I was spending more hours at the school. It was verging on fifteen hours a day (tech week led me to eighteen plus hours).

"What's up between CG and Lillith?" I asked Tal, both of us having a break in the long hours of theater. Lillith was in the friend group too, and both of them were having a falling out.

"Everyone is dropping CG, haven't you heard?" Tal asked me.

"No... not really. What's... uh... what's going on with her?" I said slowly, my phone vibrating from many messages, probably from CG. CG messaged me so much, that it could be considered concerning.

"CG has been a jerk to Lillith. Well, more specifically Lil's mom. CG has just been so rude to her." Tal went into more detail about what CG has been saying. "People have also been dropping her because she's been a bit obsessed with you."

"What?" and I swear my heart was beating in my brain. It was in my throat, pulsing through my veins instead of in my chest. "She doesn't really... what do you mean?"

"All she talks about is you in conversation with us, she only texts you, she has a concerning amount of pictures of you. There is so much more." Tal said.

"I'm just having..." I brought my panicked breathing down a bit, and stopped my hands from shaking. I wiped some tears from the corners of my eyes, all within a few seconds. Some commotion happened and I noticed another girl breaking down. She was in my choir class this year, and I developed a slight crush on her throughout sophomore year. "Looks like everyone is having a rough night," I commented humorously.

This was when I realized CG was obsessed with me. I realized not only that, but I had allowed this to happen, and that in order for it to stop, I had to remove myself from her.

That was the night I stopped viewing her as a friend.

[balletandbow]

Never in my life will I tell anyone else that their feelings or experience with homeschooling are incorrect or invalid or wrong. What I will say is that homeschooling can be and is done right, and that I think I was lucky enough to experience it myself.

My mother was a kindergarten teacher before she had kids, and worked as a nanny once I was born so she could stay with me more. By the time I was ready for kindergarten (my birthday is in August, I was barely 5) we were living in the middle of nowhere and I would have had an hour round trip bus ride every day. Our state had few laws prohibiting homeschooling, and this was literally what my mom's degree was in, so she just taught me.

We moved a couple years later, and by the time we hit the upper years of my mom's ed degree we had enrolled in the local school district's homeschooling supervision program. Every year my mother made a list of the curriculum she had chosen for me (and eventually my two brothers) and turned it in to a certified teacher who was assigned to supervise us. We did pretty much anything you can think of. English was separated into reading and writing (so many different books and so many essays oh my god), math (with a textbook fear not), history (my mom pulled out weird Manifest Destiny books out and added extra books from indigenous authors), science (I got my iPod taken away for pretending to do my work when I didn't lmao), and so many field trips and fun things that are so much easier to do when most kids are in school.

We participated in the weekly class that the supervision program offered starting when I was in 5th grade. Every Wednesday afternoon we would spend 3 hours with other homeschooled kids, doing theatre, art, or some kind of history or science project depending on the time of year. The middle and high school groups put on a full play in a semester every year. A few other kids and I who were supervised by the same teacher formed a little club and made our parents let us meet up a second time a week and we got to help make the play sets and generally were little nerds.

In middle school I started taking classes at our public middle school. I was there for math because my supervising teacher had me take a placement test when my mom decided to change math curriculums and they had decided I was ready for Algebra a little early. I also went for choir, because I liked to sing. I ended up taking math at the public school all the way through high school because our district had an advanced math track that let me take Algebra 2, Pre calc, and Calc AB in 3 years and I liked math too much to say no to that. I also took 4 years of Spanish, AP Lang, chemistry, art, theater, and lots of choir.

I had friends at school and I had friends at my homeschool stuff. I got to do a year of history curriculum learning about the early day of the Christian church. My freshman year of high school the writing part of my English curriculum was literally to write a novel. It sounds crazy looking back on it but it was so much fun, and I learned literally so much, which was indeed the point.

When the pandemic hit in the spring of my junior year our public schools all closed for the year. We kept homeschooling. I took all my senior year public school classes from our basement. It was hard, but not all that different than what I did with my other subjects. I started college in the fall of 2021 and discovered that it's really very similar to what I had already been doing. Go learn from the professor. Do your work on your own time. Come back, get feedback, and do it again.

I move in for my senior year of college in a week. There's a lot of discussions about pretty much every aspect of education happening in the world, from the pandemic to asynchronous classes to homeschooling and indoctrination to free lunches. There's a lot of bad homeschoolers out there, and there's a lot of kids who were never taught what they needed to learn to be successful adults. This is just what me and my family did. It definitely shaped me as a person, but as I'm getting older it's becoming less important to my life, which to me signals that my parents and various teachers did a good job.

[boredright]

They were meant for each other 💚

Around 5k words (sorry not sorry 🙃)

Gojo Satoru x reader

Yn has always known the boy named Gojo Satoru. Because she had the biggest crush on him. Gojo was the heartthrob of high school not only because of his looks but also he was the captain of the basketball team. And it happened to be that yn was the head of the cheerleader group. They both attended the same high school and had known each other since freshman year. However, they were never close until they were forced to work together for a school project in their junior year. It was a great opportunity for Yn to be at least a little bit close to Gojo.As they spent more time together, Yn started to notice the little things about Gojo that she had never noticed before. Maybe because she had never talked to him in the past. She admired his passion for basketball and his leadership skills on the field. Gojo, on the other hand, was drawn to Yn's beauty, intelligence, and her incredible cheerleading skills.He had never felt a kind of feeling in his stomach,that he felt whenever he was near Yn.

One day, after a long day of school, Gojo and Yn found themselves walking home together. It's because they spent hours working hard on the presentation of the project. It was the first time they had ever walked home together, and they found themselves laughing and chatting along the way."Yeah right.And then he was like why did you do that" said Gojo laughing .Hearing Gojo laugh would always make Yn fall in love with him harder. As they approached Yn's house, "So um..Yn would you like.Go out with me on this Saturday. You know more like a date." Gojo said as he winked at her. Yn was way to surprised to speak. She had always dreamt of going out with Gojo but a date. A FREAKING DATE!!A lot was going through her mind.

To her surprise she said yes without thinking twice."Sure a 'DaTe' sounds fun to me."

On the day of their date, Gojo was nervous and excited. He even asked his best friend Geto Suguru for help.(how to act confident when you are in love 😉) He had planned a very simple date. A picnic in the park .

As they sat under the shade of a Sakura tree, eating sandwiches and chatting, Yn felt like she was on top of the world. To Gojo Yn was everything he had ever wanted in a girl, and he never imagined that he would be so lucky as to be sitting there with her.

As the sun began to set, Gojo put on the mixtape he had made for Yn and asked her to dance."Wanna dance with me, pretty". "Sure handsome " Yn tried her best not to stutter.They danced to the slow songs, twirling around each other, lost in the music .It was then that Gojo knew he was falling in love with Yn. Unbeknownst that Yn was already in love with him.

Over the next few weeks, Gojo and Yn went on more dates, and their love continued to grow. But none of them dared to confess afraid that the other would not feel the same .They went to the movies, out for dinner, and even took a day trip to the beach.

Their relationship was not without its challenges, however. Gojo's basketball season began to ramp up, and he found himself spending less time with Yn. On the other hand Yn's cheerleading competitions also began to take up more of her time, and they struggled to find time to see each other between their busy schedules.

One day, Yn came to Gojo's basketball game, but he was so focused on the game that he didn't even see her in the stands. His jersey sticking with his rock hard biceps almost made Yn choke on air. "Fuck. Gojo you are killing me." She murmured bitting her lower lips.

On a random Monday Gojo took Yn to the rooftop."So what do we have here . Let me guess . Hmm..." You said acting like to be thinking of something ."Ok Yn fun aside I need to tell you something." "Hmm, sure go ahead." Clearing his throat he said

"So um Yn Ln ever since I got to know you PROPERLY I knew You were the most beautiful girl that I have ever seen. You made me complete and put a smile on my face every single day that no one else could ever do and would never do. You are the most amazing girl I know, a model, and as sweet as can be. And now I want to make it official.

I like- no I love you."

Yn couldn't take it anymore.Tears started to fall down her cheeks. "This..Is this a dream, it can't be real, It doesn't feel real." She barely whispered. But Gojo was quick to hear it. "Oh I am so sorry I didn't mean to hurt you. We can still be frien-".Before Gojo could finish his sentence Yn pulled him by his collar and passionately kissed him. Gojo could not hold it anymore.He snaked his arms to Yn's waist and kissed her back. Their lips danced , taking in each other's taste. As they broke apart , Yn tried catching her breath. Touching Yn's head with his own head he said "I Love You" and smiled."I love you too .I have always LOVED you Gojo Satoru."

As the end of their senior year approached, Gojo and Yn knew that they would be going off to separate colleges. They were both excited for the future, but also sad to think about being apart. However, they made a promise to each other that they would make it work, no matter what.

On the night of their senior prom, Gojo and Yn got all dressed up and went to the dance together. Yn wore a emerald green silk dress with black high heels.They danced the night away, laughing and taking silly photos. As the night came to a close, Gojo said "I am going to miss you so much." He fake pouted.

After prom, they went out to a dandelions field where they could look at the stars. They laid down on a blanket and held hands, feeling the cool grass beneath them. As they looked up at the stars, they talked about the future and all the adventures they would have together."I would love to breed you with my kids ..but in future" he seductively said and winked."Yeah, right." Yn blushed and tried to hold her smile."You look cute when you blush like that."Saying that Gojo pulled strand of hair behind Yn's ear and gently kissed her forehead.

In that moment, they knew that their love was meant to be and that they would always find their way back to each other, no matter where life took them. They fell asleep under the stars, wrapped in each other's arms, knowing that they had actually found their real love.

[purplesurveys]

1778

Do you ever have days where you just don’t do anything? That's the way my days flow on weekends, for the most part. The only reason I've been more out and about lately is because my dad's home and we do tend to go out as a family more when that's the case.

But, yes. Embracing getting older also means increasingly enjoying my time at home and having no agenda.

Have you ever been extremely tired but refused to go to sleep? I do it all the time – it's revenge bedtime procrastination and I stick with it whether weeknight or weekend.

What is your favorite episode of True Life, if you have one at all? I've never seen any bit of that show before.

Have you ever experienced something paranormal? Nah.

What’s the longest amount of time you’ve been stuck in traffic? That was the time I attempted to join Leni Robredo's thanksgiving rally last year. I just needed to drive the same distance from my house to university, but my time in the car ended up being 5 hours because apparently the whole of Metro Manila was headed the same way. Suffice it to say I missed the entire event and just made the most out of my efforts to drive out by going out for drinks with friends instead.

Best field trip experience? All my favorite field trips were the ones that were museum-heavy. In Grade 5 we went to Intramuros and 2-3 other museums in the area; in freshman year of high school we went to two museums in Makati.

Have you ever been to New York City? I have not.

If so, is it all its cracked up to be? I know it's not the urban fairytale the movies make it out to be but I'd still love to have the chance to visit.

What is the most amount of money you’ve spent on a meal before? I don't know about individual meals, but my biggest bill was when I took my family to Blackbird and everything came up to a bit over 10k.

What museums have you visited, if any? Well, a lot. I like museums and I even try to visit at least one when I have vacations overseas.

Have you ever had a group project and one of your partners bailed on you? Yes that was quite common especially in college.

What’s your worst traveling experience? It was a plane trip headed to Kuala Lumpur and there was a horrible fucking toddler who cried (read: shrieked) the whole 4 hours. It got increasingly loud and reached an untolerable climax during the latter part when the family needed to strap it in its own seat. I think I may have shed a tear or two myself towards the end...

Sims 1, 2, or 3? Why? Idk I was never a big gamer even of the Sims so I don't really have a favorite.

Have you ever dealt with noisy neighbors or roommates? How did that go? We've only had noisy neighbors once but tbh we just let them be because as Filipinos we're largely nonconfrontational. Plus those neighbors moved out after only a few months so things turned out fine.

Who was (or is) the teacher that gave you the hardest time in school? Oh there were a lot! Students these days are very fortunate that the world has softened for them, because in my time it was very common for teachers to wind up being the bullies, and for complaints about them to land in deaf ears. In Grade 4 I had a science teacher who took every opportunity to embarass me publicly; in Year I my history teacher always looked like she wanted to pinch the shit out of me lol; and in Years III and IV I had an English teacher who made me feel like she was always wishing I wasn't her student.

I'm grateful for the memories I made with my friends in that school, but were the elders and system absolutely awful. Transferring into a liberal and progressive university was the easiest non-adjustment I had to go through.

Best muffin you’ve ever had? Not a big fan of muffins. I've had a few chocolate ones but nothing has stood out to be the best.

Have you ever taken a woodshop class? Nope.

If so, was it required? That is not a thing here.

How much time do you spend on Facebook, if you have one? I don't know...maybe an accumulated 1 hour a day? I go through FB multiple times daily but it's always in very very quick checkins.

What area of math are you best at? Worst? I'm okay with algebra and statistics, but I've never understood the point of geometry and that directly translates to how I struggled with the subject in high school haha.

How do you feel when you meet someone with the same music taste as you? It's fun when I find a K-pop fan because we can automatically relate on so many things. We don't even have to both like BTS; the K-pop fan culture is enough to start hours' worth of conversation and jokes. Other than that it's impossible to find local Beyoncé, Paramore, or punk rock fans so I kind of just wander those worlds on my own lol.

How often do you “half-ass” things (put little effort in)? I'm not sure about frequency but that's something I'll sometimes do when I can't bring myself to give a crap about work tasks. I'm done showing passion in every single thing because I'm super burned out at this point.

Do you ever feel self-conscious when you eat around other people? Not really.

Has a teacher ever made you hate yourself/your work? Not necessarily, but some of them made me just ask a bunch of questions about the way they treated me. Like why did they hate me so much? Why do they seem so miserable so as to target their own students? stuff like that.

How reliable is your internet connection? We've actually been out of internet since Thursday and our service provider has been very useless and helpless and scum of the earth, so I've been using data since then and 100% worsening my phone battery.

Have you ever missed a meeting/event that was required/necessary? Yes. Work is not everything and if I can't be in a particular meeting or event, it's not the end of the world and I'm done feeling guilty about the whole thought of being absent lol.

What’s something that makes you incredibly nervous? Work.

What’s the latest you’ve ever stayed up to finish homework/a project? There was one time I had to pull up an all-nighter for a project, and unsurprisingly it was a group project. Like of course it would be a project that involved other people, because if it was a solo thing there never would have been a need for me to stay up all night. That gig soured me from group projects for the rest of college.

If you don’t have glasses, how would you feel if you had to get them? I do have them.

If you do have glasses, how would you feel if you didn’t need them anymore? It'd be refreshing but idk, I've had glasses for 14 years now. It's a part of my identity and how people remember me that I'll always choose to have them on, even if I had the opportunity to undergo some magical procedure that'd totally fix my eyesight.

How many vegetarians do you know? Less than 10.

Have you ever considered going to art school? Kind of. I passed an art management program in one of the universities I applied to, but chose to go to my dream school instead.

Is there anyone in your life who consistently angers you? No.

How quickly can you write an essay? Probably an hour if you gave me enough background info to work with, and time to research.

Have you ever had problems falling asleep in class? Never fell asleep while in school.

Have you ever been on the barrier or front row at a concert? Sure! I was for Paramore. I guess I was too for Se So Neon but that was sort of a given since it was a much smaller show and it had been very easy to squeeze my way to the front.

What bug frightens you most? Cockroaches, bees, and wasps.

Are your parents supportive of you? My dad is. Idk what to think of my mom's form of support. It seems she shows it when it benefits her or when it's something she can show off in social media. I stopped looking for validation from her a long time ago.

How often do you take the train to go places? I don't.

Do you play with your phone in awkward situations Sure.

Have you ever participated in a mock trial, or a real trial? No.

[jungwonenthusiast]

Field Trip

A/N: I’ve been working on this pic for a while, I hope you guys like it :)

Pairing: Jake Sim x fem! reader

Word count: 5.2k

Genre: fluff, high school au

Warning: mentions of virginity loss and porn, occasional swearing, nothing else I think

“How many shirts should I take?” Jake asks you through your phone. 

“Uhm, we’re there for three days so take four just incase.” you reply and you pack your suitcase as well. 

You two were preparing for your five day field trip to New York which was happening tomorrow. 

You packed your favorite jeans and hoodies and even a dress just in case. You can't help but romanticize the hell out of New York after being stuck in this small town all your life. 

“How many pairs of underwear should I take?” he asks again and you giggle. He’s like a kid sometimes.  “How many times do you think you’ll change your underwear?” you say while sitting on your suitcase to get it to zip closed.

“Probably three but I’ll take four just in case.”

“What a quick learner.” you say and you hear him scoff. 

Jake has been your best friend since elementary school when you scraped your knee during tag and he took you to the nurse’s office. He’s been a sweetie since day one. 

“I doubt I’m gonna get any sleep tonight,” you sigh. “I’m too riled up.”

“Same,” he sighs. “I wonder how many flashers we’ll run into.”

You laugh. “Why is that the first thing you think of you creep.”

“Hey now,��� he chuckles. “I thought that was the stereotype.”

You hop onto your bed and pick your phone up, it looks like Jake’s doing the same. All you can see are his eyes and a bit of his nose bridge. His dark hair has started to grow out and it was poking at his eyelids. 

Your phone pings with a text from Jake. It’s a horrendous screenshot of you climbing over your phone to get into bed. You gasp.

“I’ll kill you.” you tell him as he’s holding in his laugh. “I will do it.”

His laugh bursts out of his throat, jolly and warm. “Why I love it.”

“I hate you so much. Delete it.”

“No way,” he bunches his brows. “You have an entire photo album dedicated to bad pictures of me.”

“And I also have an entire album dedicated to good pictures of you.” you roll your eyes.

“You do?” he asks. “That’s a bit fangirly of you.”

“Me? A fangirl? Maybe Madeline but not me.” you scoff.

“Madeline?” his voice perks up. “She likes me?”

“Yeah, I thought you knew this.” you swear that you’ve brought this up before. Maybe he just forgot. 

“Nuh-uh.” he says.

“Well...” you say. “do you like her back.”

“I mean she’s nice but,” he hesitates. “not really.”

“Why not? She’s smart and super pretty. I'm so jealous of her hair.” you say. Madeline was a tan ginger girl with curly fiery hair down to the small of her back. 

“You have nice hair.” he says nonchalantly. 

You touch it and rub it between your fingers. “It’s whatever.”

He scoffs. “You’re too hard on yourself all the time.”

“I’m a teenage girl, I can’t help it.” You defend yourself, but he isn’t lying. 

“I’m bored, can I come over?” he says suddenly. 

“Tonight? We have school tomorrow.” you reply. 

“Maybe I’ll just sleep over.” he says while turning over in his bed. “I don’t think our parents would care.”

Sleepover? You two hadn’t done that since you turned eleven. 

“Where would you sleep?” you ask him, already imagining how this would go.

“I don’t know on the floor.” he shrugs.

“I’m not letting you sleep on the floor I’ll feel bad.” you argue.

“I don’t care, I’m the one who suggested it, plus I miss you dude, I wanna hang out.” he says and you smile.

“I saw you on Friday.”

“Yeah, a whole two days ago.” he gets up off his bed. “Okay I’ll be there in ten.”

“What-” you start but he cuts you off.

He brings the camera up close to his face and he flashes you a smile. “Bye!” he hangs up. 

Your palms feel a bit sweaty and you brush them off on your pants. Why am I nervous? You guys have had plenty of sleepovers before but the rest of the boys were always there, probably passed out from beer or a sugar crash. 

You tidy your room up a bit and prepare a little blanket bed on the floor right next to your actual bed. 

You hear knocking at the door right when you expected, Jake was hardly ever late. 

“Hola~” he says as he walks in with his backpack on. He takes his shoes off before skipping over to your room. You giggle to yourself. 

He falls back onto your bed with a big sigh. “I missed being here.” 

“Why? There’s nothing cool here. Your house is way cooler.” you say and he smiles.

“Well I can’t deny that,” he shrugs and you punch him in the arm. “you’re the one who said it.”

“We get it rich boy.” you roll your eyes and sit down next to him.

“I’m just playing,” he sits up. “you know that.”

“I hope you showered after practice,” you say. “I don’t want you stinking up my bed.”

He whips his head to you, looking a little bit offended. “I am very clean alright? Here smell my hair.” he shoves his head into your face. 

You let out a strangled noise and try to push him away. “Okay, okay!”

“No smell it,” he keeps his hair up in your face, it’s tickling your nose. “smells like mangos right.”

Admitedly, he's right. It smells like mangos.

“Yes it does,” you squeak out. “now please respect my personal bubble.” you spread your arms out and create an imaginary bubble between you two. He tries to tug at your arm but you bellow in a robot voice. “PERSONAL BUBBLE PERSONAL BUBBLE.”

“Fine, fine.” he falls back onto your bed again, laughing. “Lets watch something.”

You follow suit and tug your laptop into your lap. 

“Hold on,” you get up and close your window, it was starting to get too cold.

You shimmy under your covers and pull up Netflix.

“Scary movie?” you click on the horror section.

“Sure but you probably won’t be able to sleep.” he teases and you roll your eyes. 

“That was years ago.” you start to scroll through the movies. 

“Mhm, and I’m never letting you live it down.” he says with pride. 

During freshman year the gang decided to go to Jay’s house to watch It together and it freaked you out so much that you went to sleep in the boys room rather than the guest room. 

You click on Hush, a movie you’ve been avoiding because it’s about one of your biggest fears, a home invasion. 

“I thought you hated this movie.” Jake says, crossing his arms.  “I do, but I need to face my fears eventually right?” you click on it and get up to turn the lights off. 

Jake soon gets under the covers as well. You both cringe and slap each other every time your feet touch. 

“Yo yo yo yo watch out!” Jake whispers and pulls his hood over his head, something you both do when you’re nervous. You weren’t wearing a hoodie so you settled with a spare blanket and draped it over yourself like a cloak. 

“Oh shit,” you whisper. “look behind you!” you yell at the main character. 

By the end of the movie both of your bodies are stiff and sore from being so tense for two hours straight. 

“I thought she was gonna die.” you sigh and you shut your laptop. 

“Nah, they couldn’t kill the main girl.” Jake says, comfy and cuddled up in your duvet. “She was so smart.”

“Yeah she was.” you yawn and then kick Jake in the side. “Go to your bed.”

He groans. “It’s warm here though.”

“Go and I’ll make pancakes tomorrow.” you say.

He perks up and follows your orders. 

You relax into your mattress, but you miss his warmth next to you. You ignore that. 

Your alarm goes off at 6:30 and Jake sleeps right through it. 

“How the hell does he get up in the morning?” you whisper. “Probably Leila.”

He’s sleeping on his side, cuddling a stuffed animal he must’ve stolen from your bed while you were asleep.

You stretch your back before washing up. 

Jake’s POV

My serene sleep is interrupted by pokes at my shoulder. 

“Get up poop.” she says. I almost forgot that I was at her house. I crack my eyes open to find her crouching next to me. 

“Good morning.” I croak out.

“You stole ginger.” she points at the stuffed bunny in my arms. 

“I was lonely.” I say before sitting up and rubbing my eyes. “What time is it?”

“7:30,” she says holding in a giggle. “go wash up so we can eat.”

“What’s so funny?” I ask her as she walks away. “You’ll see when you look in the mirror.” she says.

My eyes widen. Did she draw a dick on my forehead or something? I thought we swore to never do that.

I scramble to her bathroom to meet some gnarly bedhead. I have no clue how guys have good messy hair, my hair is either boring and flat or just messy. 

“Jesus.” I say to myself and try to run my head under the sink. 

I brush my teeth and secretly use her facial cleanser. 

“So fancy.” I whisper while lathering it up on my face. 

I can already hear her voice in my head when I’m drying off saying “don't forget to put lotion on, and face lotion, not body.”

A stack of pancakes is waiting for me in the kitchen, just as she promised. 

“Thank you mom.” I say to her before digging in.

She sits across from me with her own plate of flap jacks. She looks so pretty this early in the morning. Her face is fresh and sparkly and her eye bags somehow just make her prettier. It’s cloudy out and I can tell she’s cold she way her body is bundled up in her chair. 

I still remember the moment I realized that I liked her. It was seventh grade and we were at our town’s annual fair. She got a bit sick after a ride with a lot of loopdey loops so I stayed behind with her while the rest of the boys continued to go on every ride they pleased. She told me to go with them and that she didn’t want me to miss out but I said that it was fine and that I liked hanging out with her anyway. She smiled her bright smile at me and rested her head on my shoulder for a moment. Then she threw up on my shoes. Like projectile cotton candy, funnel cake, and other miscellaneous fair food vomit. And I didn’t even get that mad, I was more concerned for her. After that I figured I liked her, because if it were Jay I would’ve beat him up. 

“Did you have any nightmares?” I ask her and she shakes her head.

“Nah, I dreamt that Sunghoon married a dolphin. It was weird.” she sighs.

I choke on my pancakes. “A dolphin?”

“Yeah,” she laughs. “his name was Jerry.”

“And it was a guy too?” I hold my chest, trying not to choke.

“Don’t judge their interspecies homosexual marriage. It was beautiful.” she laughs and takes a big gulp of water.

I’m almost crying at this point. “Best dream ever. I can’t wait to tell Sunghoon this.”

“No!” her eyes widen. “He’s gonna think I fantasized about it or something.”

“What?” I cock an eyebrow. “Everyone knows that dreams are uncontrollable sometimes.” “Still it’s weird. Imagine if someone told you that I dreamt of you marrying a dolphin. It’s be weird.” she says through a mouth of pancake. 

“Did they have kids?” I cackle,

“I don’t know. How would that even work?” 

“Maybe they had a surrogate or something.” I suggest.

“Oh god,” she shakes her head, smiling. “we need to stop. I feel like I'm violating him.”

“Alright, alright.”

“Should I wear this shirt or this sweater.” she asks me as we’re getting ready in her room. 

“Sweater. It’s probably gonna be cold.” I say while tugging socks on. 

“Shit you’re right. Then I won’t be able to wear this dress.” she holds up a little dress that flows out a bit from the waist. 

“Bring it anyway and maybe you can wear it for a second so I can take pictures for you.” I suggest and she smiles. 

“Good idea.” 

We both settle of hoodies and jeans and say goodbye to her parents before hopping in my car. 

We get to school right when people start getting on the bus to the airport. We throw our luggage into the bottom carrier and get in line. 

“Yo!” I hear a familiar voice call as we get on. “We saved seats for you guys.”

Jay, Sunghoon, Heeseung, Jungwon, Sunoo, and Niki have already gotten comfortable in the back of the bus. Niki was already asleep. Y/N couldn’t help but pat his head before settling down next to Jungwon. The bus wasn’t a school one but one of those fancy ones they bring out once a year. 

I sit down next to Sunghoon and dap him up. 

“What’s up.” I say while putting my backpack down by my feet. 

“Tired.” he says. “Valentina kept me up all night.”

I raise an eyebrow and he smirks. 

“For real?” I ask and he nods. “No way.”

“Yeah way.” he says and holds up a fist.

I fist bump him and pat him hard on the shoulder. 

“You’re a man now Sunghoon.” I congratulate him and he snickers. 

“What does that make you then?” 

“I’m taking my time alright? I’ll get there eventually.” I say, a little embarrassed. 

I look back to check out what she’s doing when we start to drive off. She’s fast asleep with her cheek pressed against Jungwon’s shoulder. He looks like he’s about to dose off too. Cute. 

Sunghoon and I watch a couple episodes of Death Note before we arrive at the airport. Sunoo shakes Y/N and Jungwon up. 

She’s still groggy as we walk into the airport and grabs onto my arm for leverage. My heart jumps a little. It’s not often that we touch despite how much I think about touching her. I could stare at her back all day. She could ignore me for the rest of my life and I’d still be happy to be in her presence. Mental note to all of you: do NOT let your feelings get to this point.

Soon we’re on the plane and she chooses to sit next me. I silently celebrate. Sunoo and Sungoon behind us, Heeseung and Niki next to us, and Jay and Jungwon in front of us. Sunoo pokes his head over her seat.

“Do you have chapstick I can borrow.” he asks with his blonde hair flopping over his forehead. 

She digs into her bag and hands him a small tin of lip balm.

“Thank you!” he says and she nods. 

“Are you that tired?” I ask her.

“Mhm,” she sighs and shuts her eyes. “I forgot to drink coffee this morning.”

I put in my AirPods and start to watch Lady Bird. She looks over and takes an AirPods out of my ear. 

“I wanna watch too.” she say and puts it in her own. 

We take off for the six hour trip and soon Y/N is sound asleep. Her head kept dropping forward so I pushed it up and pulled it to rest on my shoulder. This was not on purpose. I can’t help but snap a picture of her and add it to the good pictures of her album. She looks so peaceful and comfortable and gorgeous. I lay my head on hers for a moment before continuing the movie. 

Y/N’s POV

After two hours of unsatisfying sleep, and hour of gossip with Sunoo, and three hours of chit chat with Jake you finally arrive. You sit up and stretch as best as you can in the plane. You pull you backpack onto my back and get you luggage down from the overhead bin. It’s already five p.m. when we get off and your stomach is growling. 

We take another bus to the hotel and you can’t help but admire the city life as we drive there. 

You’re roomed with two other girls at the hotel but you don’t even bother unpacking. You know you’re gonna be in the boys’ room anyway.

Mrs. Gilroy gave us tonight to do whatever we wanted as long as we were back at the hotel by ten p.m. 

You sneak into Jake, Jay, and Sunghoon’s room as soon as you can. And when you get there, it’s already a mess.

“Good lord.” you say as you’re met with clothes all over the floor and mini bottles of liquor on the beds.

“You guys are drunk already?” you scrunch your nose and drop your stuff in a corner of the room.

“No.” Sunghoon says to you lazily with a little smirk on his face. You can’t help but giggle. Sunghoon is pretty adorable when he’s drunk. 

“Are you drunk too?” you turn to Jake and he shakes his head. His pink cheeks give him away though. “You’re all bad liars.”

“Lets go swim.” he says excitedly. 

“There’s a pool? I didn’t bring a swim suit.” you say, bummed.

“Can we go later, I’m hungry.” Jay says and you agree.

“Me too.” 

Jake tugs at your arm. “Come on~ we can order room service or ask Jay to get us something.”

“We can get you guys something.” Sunghoon says, pulling a hoodie over his head. 

“Please?” Jake looks at you with shiny eyes. He’s and adorable drunk too.

You purse your lips and sigh. “Fine. But I don’t have anything to wear.”

“Just wear shorts and a shirt.” Jake says as he tugs his swim trunks out of his suit case.

“I didn’t bring shorts because you said it was gonna be cold.” you complain, crossing your arms. 

“Uhm,” he stops for a moment. “you can wear my boxers then.”

You raise your eyebrows. “Huh?”

“What?” he looks at you. “They’re basically shorts. And they’re clean.”

You hesitate but then comply as always. He tosses you a pair of black Calvins.

You steal one of Jay’s shirts and make your way into the bathroom to change. You’re wearing a simple cotton bralette which should be fine for the pool. You bundle up the rest of your old clothes and stick them behind your backpack before heading out with Jake. 

The pool is empty and huge and is only light by the lights inside. 

“It’s so cold.” you rub at your arms as Jake sets your towels down at a seat.

“I’m sure the pool is heated.” he says and dips a toe in. “Yeah, it’s warm.” Before you can even reply, he tugs his shirt off and canon balls in. You turn your face to avoid getting splashed.

“How is it?” you call out as he emerges from the water. He shakes his hair around like a dog. 

“It’s warm so come in, you look funny standing there.” he teases and you roll your eyes. You kick your sneakers off and try to make a peaceful jump in but you didn’t realize you were in the deep end. It takes you a moment to get your senses together and swim to the surface.

“Why is it deep?” you say, a bit out of breath. 

Jake giggles at you. “Remember when we used to play and you were the mermaid and I was the-”

“Turtle companion.” you finish his sentence. “Yes, as clear as day.”

“Why couldn't I be a mermaid too? Why was a I a lame turtle.” he fusses.

“I’m sorry okay?” you laugh. “I was a mean child.”

“Yeah you were. I’ll never forgive you for shoving that clump of dirt in my mouth.” 

You burst out laughing, flailing your arms in the water to try to stay afloat. “You deserved it!”

“I did not!” he protests. 

“You cheated in handball! It was one hundred percent deserved.” you say, swimming over to him.

“I barely cheated!” he calls out, starting to swim away from you.

“Barely? I would’ve won and been champion of our grade if you hand’t pulled that shit!” you say, still laughing and swimming after him.

“Why are you chasing me?” he says while hopping around the pool where he can touch the ground.

“So I can shove another clump of dirt in your mouth.” you try your best to get him but your heavy cotton shirt is holding you back. You don’t let it stop you though. 

You finally get to him and tug his arm. He yells as you push him underwater. He finds the ground though, and shoots up soon after. 

“Are you trying to drown me?” he looks at you, astonished but giggly. 

“Maybe.” you shrug before tackling him again. It had been a while since you two wrestled like this. 

You’ve got him under water for a bit until he finds your rib cage and plunges you in. It’s hard to hold your breath while you’re laughing. You feel around for him and pinch his thigh only semi hard. He lets you go after that. 

“I won!” you celebrate with your fists in the air.

“You used pain, that isn't fair.” he rubs at the area that you pinched. 

“Don’t be a sore loser. I won fair and square.” you cross your arms.  “Fine.” he admits his defeat. “that pinch hurt though, come kiss it better.”

Your face twists. “Nuh uh.” you say plainly. 

“Please?” he asks. “I will drown myself right now.” You laugh at him. 

“I will do it!” he insists.

“Okay, okay! I’m not to going to kiss your leg you weirdo but I’ll give you a hug.” you float over to him and wrap your arms around his shoulders. “I even pinched you lighter than I normally would.”

“I’m sensitive.” he says into your neck and you giggle. 

His arms feel so right around your waist and you struggle to decide when to let go, so you just don’t, and neither does he. He holds you decently tight and you feel him pat your back. 

You’ve hugged plenty of times before but it felt a little different this time. Probably because you’re pressed up against his bare skin. It makes you feel a bit sheepish. 

You pull away from him. “Feel better now?” 

He nods with a smile. His cheeks are pink, but this time it’s not from the liquor. 

Jake’s POV

I can’t help but feel disappointed when she lets go of me. 

I shouldn’t have patted her back that's a dad thing to do. 

Her makeup has started to run down her face which makes me giggle.

“What?” she asks.

“Your mascara is making you look crazy.” I say and her hands fly to her face.

“Shit I forgot I had it on.” she attempts to wipe it away but all it does is smear it across her face. 

“Here,” I say and float over to her. “I’ll help you.” this was not on purpose.

I hold her face as gently as I can in my hands and rub the runny mascara off with my thumbs. I dip my fingers into the water to get all of the bits off. 

I want to kiss her so badly, but I know that I’ll never do it. Sometimes I get irritated at myself for not being able to confess. I think Jay and Sunghoon get irritated about it too. 

“You talk about her all the time man just ask her out.”

I don't know why I can’t do it. If she rejects me she’ll do it nicely and things would go back to normal pretty soon. But I don’t think I could live knowing that my feelings would never be reciprocated. Sometimes I get a feeling that she likes me too but I can never be too sure. 

“All gone.” I say and she thanks me. 

She lets her self float on her back. She has a small smile on her face and she’s so pretty I could cry. There have been multiple times where I nearly cried over how much I like her.

“What are your thinking about?” I ask.

“You know I never know how to answer that.” she bleats. “My mind always goes blank when you ask.”

“Well try to remember what you were thinking about then.” 

“Us.” she says plainly.  “Us?” I questioned. “What about us?” “I don’t know, just how I met you guys and how happy I am to be friends with you all.” she says. 

Oh. She meant all of us. 

“Yeah me too.” I agree, trying not to sound down. “Who’s your favorite?”

She snorts. “I don’t have a favorite.”

“Of course you do,” I say. “and it better be me.”

“Why would it be you?” she jeers. 

I frown. “Because we met first.”

“I’m kidding, of course you’re my favorite.” she admits.

“And why is that?” I egg her on and she rolls her eyes. 

“Because we met first.”

I sigh. “Is that all?”

“Mhm.” she says. 

Y/N’s POV

You’re met with InNOut that Sunghoon and Jay got and also a room full of teenage boys. The younger ones were laying on their stomachs on a bed together, watching something on a laptop. Sunghoon and Jay were trying to watch t.v. You say trying because of the furious clicking on the remote. 

“What the hell are you guys trying to do?” you and Jake plop onto the one empty bed.

“Trying to find the porn.” Jay grumbles.

“Infront of the children?” you look over at the younger ones.

“They don’t care they’re watching YouTube.” he says, still clicking. 

You take a bite of your burger. “You have an endless arena of porn on your phone why do you want the t.v. one?”

“The t.v. makes it special.” Sunghoon says. 

“Weird.” you mutter to yourself.  “They’re probably gonna make you pay for it too.” Jake chimes in. 

“Do you think it’ll go to the school’s credit card or whatever?” Jay asks with wide eyes.

“I don't know but if it does they’ll know it’s from our room.” he says through a full mouth. 

You grab pajamas out of your bag and head to the bathroom to shower. 

You come out feeling fresh and the younger ones have gone back to their room now. 

“My turn,” Jake says, walking into the bathroom. 

You sit next to Sunghoon on his bed and start scrolling through your phone. 

“Should I get this sweater or this one.” he holds his phone up to you and shows you light blue sweater and a black one.

“Second one.” you say.

“Really?” he questions. “I feel like it’ll make me look emo.”

“You should become emo honestly. It would look good.” you reply and he chuckles. 

“You’d have to help me with my eyeliner every morning.”

“Yeah,” you giggle “wait can I do it right now? I wanna see how you’d look.”

“Right now?” he cocks a brow and you nod. “Okay but don’t give me raccoon eyes.”

“I won’t I won’t.” you rush over to your bag and bring your make clutch to the bed. 

“Hold still.” you tell him as you give him smokey winged liner.

“It tickles.” he says, trying not to blink too much.

“Beauty is pain.” you clean up the wing with your nail. 

In a couple minutes you’re done. “Finished." you say.

“Lemme see.” he grabs a hand mirror from your clutch and holds it up to his face. “Hold on. This looks kinda good.”

“Right?” you had to admit it; he looked gorgeous.

“Why are you so pretty?” Jay says from his bed. 

Soon Jake came out of the shower and it was hard to deny how good looking he is especially with his damp hair. How could someone make a t-shirt and sweats look so good? He dumps his laundry by his bag. 

“Does Sunghoon have makeup on?” he asks, settling onto his bed.

“Yeah doesn’t it looks nice?” you ask and he agrees. 

“Y/N are you gonna sleep here or in your room.” Jay asks.

“I thought I would just sleep on the floor here.” you suggest and he furrows his brows. 

“No that’s mean. Share a bed with someone.”

“You should sleep with Jake.” Sunghoon elbows you in the side and you shoot him a dirty look. “We all know he wants you to anyway.”

“Fuck off Sunghoon.” Jake looks over at him with a piercing stare, a contrast to his pink cheeks. 

“Is it okay if I do?” you ask him and he nods.

“Yeah for sure.”

Sunghoon snickers. 

“I hate you.” Jake scowls. 

After a couple hours of watching movies and horsing around it’s nearly midnight and your eyes are getting heavy. 

You crawl under the covers and scroll on your phone a bit before trying to sleep. Despite how tired you are it’s hard to sleep with the boys chatting and snickering to each other. 

“Can you guys quiet down?” you ask them.

“Sorry.” Jay says. 

After maybe an hour of sleep, you feel someone get on the bed. Probably Jake, you think to yourself. His little sighs as he gets comfortable are cute. 

“You awake?” he whispers. 

“Mm?” you turn on your side to face him. “Yeah.”

“Cool.” he says. The room is dark but the moonlight helps you make out the outline of his face. 

‘What’s up?” you ask.

“Nothin.” he says and you giggle.

“Okay weirdo. Go to bed.” you close your eyes, stilling facing him though. 

“I’m not tired.” he says.

“Count sheep.”

“That never works for me.” he sighs. “Sing me to sleep.”

You try to slap him in the arm but you end up hitting his face. “Oh shit sorry!”

“Ow!” he whines. “Why do you keep hurting me?”

“It was an accident!” you whisper and rub at his cheek a bit. 

“Now I actually deserve a hug.” he pouts and you roll your eyes.

“You are not five years old.”

“I still want the hug.” he says plainly and you sigh.

“Fine.” you scooch over to him and pull him into your chest. You pat his back. “There there. Better now?”

He shakes his head. “It still hurts.”

“You’re embarrassing yourself.” you scoff. 

“I have no shame when it comes to your affection, you should know that by now.” he smiles.

You feel his arm fall over your waist and his hand slide up your back. It gives you goosebumps.

You’re cuddling with him. You guys are cuddling right now. You think to yourself. No you’re not, you’re just...hugging. Right?

Jake pulls away to look at you. “I need to tell you something.”

“Are you gonna say your mom again?” you ask and he shakes his head. 

“No,” he says giggling. “it’s something for real.” 

“Okay what is it?”

He takes a sharp inhale. “I like you.” he winces. 

Your heart jumps a bit. “I know.”

“What?” he laughs.  “You’re very obvious about it.” you chuckle.  “Are you rejecting me?” he asks and you shake your head. 

“I would never.” you pull him in by the back of neck and push your lips against his.

[ghstandpucks]

You Are Gold ~ Tyson Jost

I hope you like it! Requests are open!

Request/Summary: Perhaps a request? 👉🏻👈🏻 I couldn’t choose so I’m bringing you two songs 1. You Are Gold -The National Parks 2.Happy Accidents -Saint Motel I’m not picky about players but josty with one of these songs would kill me I think but it’s really up to you I’m down for whoever @tysojost

I hope you enjoy it girl!! I chose You Are Gold by The National Parks. I am now in love with this song also!

Master List

We wandered lost beneath the lights I felt small under the galaxies It was one of those familiar nights I felt big with you next to me Oh my, oh my, I think that I am falling

You were in the stands the night Tyson made the overtime goal that secured the Avs’ place in the playoffs. Cheering as loud as you could for your curly haired best friend, Tyson immediately found you in the stands after being bear hugged by his linemates. He pointed up at you and you pointed back, continuing a tradition you had going since you started watching his games in high school. Tyson was ecstatic to have had the chance to help his team make the playoffs, and with you in the stands, he felt like he could conquer the world.

When you had met Tyson your freshman year of high school, you would have never thought your life would end up like this. You were new to the school, and of course managed to trip and drop all your books in the hallway on your first day. Amid trying to hold back tears from embarrassing yourself in a new place, you saw another set of hands helping you gather your things. As you stood up, you came to face a boy with a soft smile, concern in his eyes. He asked if you were alright, and introduced himself. Turned out the two of you had your next class together, and he walked you to your class after that so that way you knew where to go. Over the next couple weeks your friendship grew, and when hockey season started you attended a few games at Tyson’s request. One game he scored the final goal that would send his team to the championships, pointing at you after and claiming you as his lucky charm. The day he was drafted you both cried, knowing he would be leaving you behind, but kept in touch. Talking every day, Tyson was able to convince you to move to Denver when you graduated college. Finding a job in your field, you packed up and joined your best friend in the States.

A year later here you were, waiting for Tyson to get out of the locker room so you could go out with the team for the night. You were talking to JT and Cale when you felt arms circle your waist and a kiss planted on your cheek. This wasn’t an unusual way for Tyson to greet you, but it always made you giggle and lean back into him. Those around you two always rolled their eyes at how oblivious you were to each other’s feelings. JT rolled his eyes and shook his head, starting to walk off with Cale. He always brought up the fact that you both had feelings for each other to Tyson, and Tyson would always wave him off. You were his best friend, that was that.

It never really was ‘that’ though. Tyson had a crush on you the second he met you. Over the years though, he was able to convince himself that it wasn’t there. It was just a high school crush that he got over. You two were comfortable with each other, which explained the closeness. When one of his friends teased him for always having an eye on you, he would explain it away with it just being him watching out for you. When he got chirped for the cuddles you two shared, he would roll his eyes and chirp them all back.

Sitting in a booth that night though, with you tucked under his arm and laughing at the dumb jokes he was making, Tyson felt invincible. He was already riding a high from his goal, but there was something different about how you felt against his side; about how you whispered how proud of him you were when he pulled you into a hug before walking into the bar just because he wanted you close. You let out a buzzed giggle at something Andre said, leaning your head on Tyson’s shoulder and all of a sudden it was like he couldn’t catch his breath.

Tyson Jost was in love with his best friend.

'Cause you are gold You are all I see You are aurum scarce and meant for kings You are gold

Tyson tapped your hip, letting you know he was going to head to the restroom before everyone took off for the night. You smiled up at him and his heart felt like it jumped. It always did when he saw you smile, but this time he couldn’t help but admire it a fraction of a second too long, everyone around you two noticing and chuckling at the oblivious pair. Standing outside the bar, you shivered against the early morning chill, hugging your arms to yourself. A moment later a set of arms were back around you pulling you back into their chest. “Whose place?” Tyson asked softly.

“Yours. Your bed is softer,” you mumbled, yawning while you turned in his arms to wrap yours around his waist. Tyson let out a low chuckle and ordered the Uber. Going home together was a regular occurrence that just added fuel to the fire for the team. Neither of you saw the point in going to your own places though when you would just end up at breakfast together the next morning. Nothing ever happened, but it didn’t stop the comments that you and Tyson would just end up rolling your eyes at.

Upon arriving at Tyson’s apartment, you changed into one of his t-shirts and sleep shorts that you had there for occasions such as this. After washing your face and brushing your teeth, you crawled under the covers as Tyson made sure the front door was locked. He climbed into bed next to you, leaving space in the middle as you both always did. “So proud of you Tys,” you muttered as your eyes were falling, your breathing becoming even.

“Couldn’t have done it without you Y/N. My lucky charm,” he whispered as to not wake you. Reaching his hand out, he brushed a few strands of hair behind your ear and rested his hand against your cheek for a moment. Retracting his hand, he chuckled in disbelief. As he let himself drift off to sleep, he found his situation so cliched. Nothing ever really prepared you to fall in love with your best friend, did it?

And there's something I need to say But I feel too afraid 'Cause when it's real there's a risk A chance that I'm nervous to take Oh my, oh my, I think that I have fallen

When Tyson woke up you weren’t there. He sighed, rolling over to get out of bed, smiling to himself when he heard a faint cuss coming from the kitchen. You were always a mess in the kitchen. A good cook, but a mess. Shuffling into the kitchen, Tyson could smell bacon and pancakes. Whipping around you smiled at him, admiring his hair that was all ruffled from sleeping. Realizing you stared a little too long, you turned your attention back to the pancakes, hoping your cheeks weren’t turning too red. The thing was, it wasn’t just Tyson falling for his best friend. You always harbored feelings for the boy, but kept them shoved aside as to not ruin your friendship.

“Breakfast is almost ready if you want to get the plates down,” you spoke, hiding your thoughts. Tyson brushed past you, a hand on your lower back as he leaned around you.

“Smells delicious,” he commented, going to set the table.

“I hope it’s good,” you said, plating the last pancake.

“If you’re cooking it’s always good,” Tyson swooped in to kiss your cheek before taking the rest of the cutlery over to the table. You giggled, knowing that this was why everyone always assumed you were together. Eating breakfast, you both rehashed the happenings of the previous night. You were laughing at how Tyson was mimicking something Landy had said in the locker room, and Tyson couldn’t help but admire you. Even with your hair sitting in a sloppy bun on top of your head and in your pajamas, he had never managed to find someone that made him feel the way you did.

'Cause you are gold You are all I see You are aurum scarce and meant for kings You are gold You are gold

'Cause you are gold You are all I see You are aurum scarce and meant for kings

You cleaned off the table and changed into your jeans from last night, knotting Tyson’s shirt that you had on at the side so it fit you better. Tyson always insisted on doing the dishes if you cooked. You walked back into the kitchen and hopped up on the countertop next to him, laughing as he splashed a little water on you. “You butt, knock it off,” you screeched.

Tyson finished the last dish, returning to your side and started to tickle you. As you laughed and tried to push him away, you slipped off the counter. Looking up, both you and Tyson froze. It wasn’t that you had never been this close before, but in that moment you both felt something in the air shift. You were pressed up against Tyson’s chest, back against the counter. Tyson was looking down at you, for once his playful deminer gone, replaced by something you really couldn’t put your finger on. Tentatively, he brought his hand up and swept a piece of hair that had fallen into your face. He didn’t want to hold back anymore. Tyson took a deep breath, thinking it was now or never. “Y/N” he whispered, lowering his head toward yours.

You were thrown by how quickly it all seemed to be changing. Lowering your head to stop Tyson, he rested his forehead on top of yours. “What’s wrong?” he asked, his voice no louder than it was a moment ago. You took a shaky breath and slightly shook your head.

“I don’t know Tys,” you whispered.

“About what?” he pried, hand dropping from your face and settling on your hip.

“What’s happening right now,” you admitted. Tyson nodded slightly and took a step back, providing you some space. He was about to walk off, go to his room and change and hope this moment could be forgotten, but it was already out there, His feelings were seeping through and now that he recognized them he didn’t want to hide them away anymore. He knew this moment was all or nothing, and when it came to you, he was always all in.

“You know you mean the world to me right?” he asked, and you nodded, looking at him apprehensively. “I don’t think anyone has ever meant anything to me as much as you do.” Tyson took a small step toward you again, reaching for your hand. You let him grab it, rub his thumb over your knuckles. Staying silent, you let him continue. “You’ve always been the person that I can turn to; rely on. I’ve never hid my true feelings from you; except that I’ve been hiding my true feelings about you because I didn’t want to believe them,” he stopped, and you nodded slightly. He took your other hand in his, now holding them both and brought one up to his lips, placing a light kiss on it. “The truth is Y/N, I can’t picture my life without you. I want to be with you, and I mean actually be with you. I think you’re so beautiful, and smart, and sweet, and annoying when we watch your favorite movie because you quote the whole thing but I love it. I love how comfortable you are around my friends, how easily you fit in with them. I love how easily you fit into my life in Denver, like you were always meant to be here with me. I love how you get shy around new people and how you lean into me for comfort. I…” he stopped, knowing this was it. “I love you Y/N.”

You looked down at your feet at his confession, completely overwhelmed. There was no way your best friend was in love with you, he couldn’t be. You didn’t realize your eyes had started to water until a tear slide off your cheek and landed on your shoe. Your thoughts were shooting back and forth between confessing the same to him, or running. Fear crept up that if it didn’t work out between you two, things would never be the same; you would lose your best friend. After his confession though, would things ever be the same again? Scared and overwhelmed, you looked back up and met Tyson’s gaze. He seemed worried that he had said too much, and you panicked. You couldn’t lose him, but were you ready for this new dynamic with him? Anxiety started to creep up in you as you shook your head and pulled your hands out of his. “I can’t do this right now Tyson. I’m sorry,” you hastily said walking over to his door, grabbing your purse along the way and exiting his apartment.

And I will wait If it's time you need What I see in you I hope you find in me

Tyson stood in his kitchen, looking at the door you had left through. What just happened? Everyone said you felt the same as him, even when he would deny it. After the disbelief settled, fear took over. Had he just lost you? His best friend, the one who meant every thing to him? He started to pace around his apartment, not sure what to do. Should he go after you, pretend it was all a joke? Should he call you? Would you even answer? He was pulled out of his thoughts an hour later by his phone ringing. Praying it was you, he ran to grab it, disappointed when he saw it was JT. “I fucked up,” he answered, and there was a chuckle from the other end of the line.

“That’s a hell of a greeting. What do you mean you fucked up?” the ginger was ready to laugh at his friend’s expense.

“I told Y/N I loved her,” Tyson spoke, quietly and quickly.

“Oh shit. How did that go over?” JT stopped what he was doing, realizing Tyson wasn’t joking around.

“She started crying and told me she couldn’t do this right now,” Tyson sat on his couch, head in his hands. JT was silent for a second, stunned that that was your response also. He would have sworn up and down, left and right that you had feelings for Tyson.

“Well if she said right now, maybe she just needs some time to think it over?” he tried to suggest as he knew Tyson was beating himself up.

“What if she thinks it over and that’s it though. I just ruined our friendship,” Tyson was on the verge of tears himself, and JT could hear it in his voice.

“Josty, I’m sure you didn’t ruin your friendship with her. Give her some space, you guys will work it out,” JT replied sympathetically. They talked for a little while longer before there was a faint knock at Tyson’s door. He stood up and sluggishly walked over to open it, freezing when he saw you standing there. Your eyes were red and puffy from crying and you were still in the same clothes you left in.

“I got to go,” he said into his phone, completely cutting off JT and hanging up on him. He would explain later. Moving aside, you walked past him and into the apartment quietly, setting your purse on the table by the door as you always did. “Where have you been?” Tyson asked you, noticing a chill run through you and running to get one of his sweatshirts for you to put on without thinking. You smiled softly at him, putting it on and letting the warm, worn in fabric envelope you.

“The stairwell. I never made it out of the building” you admitted quietly. When you had left Tyson’s, you opted for the stairs, not wanting to deal with people in the elevator. When you got a flight down though, your legs crumbled in on themselves as you started to sob. You had spent the past hour in a half crying and trying to pull yourself together in that same spot before realizing what you needed to do.

“Y/N…” Tyson reached out for you sympathetically, his heart breaking at the sight of you.

“No, I’m okay really,” you sniffled while trying to make light of the situation. “I need to tell you something.” Tyson nodded, preparing for his heart to be broken. “You mean the world to me too. I’m sorry for how I reacted. You know I hate change and I got scared. I don’t want to lose you, because I don’t want to know a life without you,” you started to cry as you spoke, the tears just flowing freely at this point. Tyson smiled as he tried to swallow back his own tears. Closing the distance between you two, he brushed away your tears with his thumb and leaned his forehead on yours. “I’m so sorry for just walking out earlier Tyson,” you whispered.

“It’s okay,” he tried to silence all the doubts he knew were swimming in your head. You shook your head ever so slightly, and tried to look him in the eye from the position you were in; your nose brushing against his.

“No it’s not. I should have told you…” you trailed off.

“Told me what?” Tyson pushed, pulling back so he could look at you correctly. It was your turn to take a deep breath, steading yourself before you uttered the words that would change your dynamic forever. There would be no going back for either of you.

“That I love you too,” you smiled softly. Tyson grinned at you, before cupping your cheek and pulling you into him. Your lips met a little clumsily, the both of you giggling into the kiss. Of course your first kiss would end up in a fit of giggles instead of being all romantic and passionate like you see in moves. But it felt right, it felt natural to be kissing him. It felt like home.

'Cause you are gold Gold You are gold Gold

Tyson was still wiping your tears away as he pulled back, the both of you grinning like a pair of idiots. “Why are you still crying?” he chuckled softly, kissing your cheeks, the tip of your nose.

“I don’t know, you know me” you giggled slightly, intertwining your fingers with his.

“That I do,” he whispered, leaning back in for a kiss that was softer this time. When you pulled back he chased your lips, wanting to make up for all the years he didn’t spend kissing you. You both spent the rest of the day at his apartment, cuddling together and enjoying each other’s company. Nothing felt much different, beside the fact that you could now kiss your best friend, and Tyson took full advantage of that. As the evening came about and you were both ready for bed, Tyson pulled you into his chest under the covers. No more was there an imaginary line when you slept, and Tyson was fully ready to never let you out of his arms again.

“This feels right,” you commented, yawning while you snuggled closer into him, if that was even possible.

“I never want to let you go,” Tyson spoke softly, lifting your chin up so he could look at you.

“Then don’t,” you matched his tone, smiling sleepily up at him and Tyson knew he was a goner, he always had been for you. “I love you Tys,” you leaned up to kiss him before settling in for the night.

“I love Y/N. Always have and always will,” he muttered, falling asleep with a smile on his face.

'Cause you are gold You are all I see You are aurum scarce and meant for kings You are gold

[cloveroctobers]

SHEA BUTTER BABY | S. James

Requested by: @theshyprincess “Can I get a spencer James getting married and smut biracial if I’m not bothering you I really like your writing”

A/N: decided to do this in hc form, hope that’s cool? And it’s been my thing lately anyways lol. Hope you like this one! I also hope I channeled Spencer well 🙃

WARNINGS: light smut + some curse words ofc!

We all know Spencer takes the world on his shoulders; when his finds you, you become his world

You meet freshman year in university, specifically on the football field and decided to invite him to a sorority party because what’s the best way to start off your freshman year? A little party never hurt nobody

Except it did, things got rowdy resulting with a huge ass knot on your forehead and losing consciousness for a few minutes

You expected Spencer to dip like any other asshole dude would have but you were shocked that he actually came to your aid and walked you back to your dorm even tho you had a “big ass egg” growing from your forehead

You could laugh about it a little then, but more so now

He actually asked for your number before you departed, even tho you thought you majorly screwed whatever this was up but he wanted to see you again and you were more than happy to oblige

It was instant friendship with a touch of flirtations but you knew that he recently got out of some heartbreak from his senior year of high school and you had no choice but to respect that he wasn’t looking for a relationship right now

Day by day you became the best of friends spending majority of your time together while also getting to know each other’s outside friends and family, you became each other’s family

It was end of sophomore year where Spencer decided he wanted to give it a go but it was your turn to be leery since you watched him go through some girls but he never flaunted that in front of you, yet you always knew

You didn’t want to be his last option

“You could never be that, y/n. You’re so much more than what you think I think of you.”

Words of affirmation is definitely Spencer’s love language and he had no problem saying how he felt about you

He openly admitted that he was confused at first, trying to fight with his inner self on taking your friendship into the love zone. He’s always gone the friendship route first before it turned into romance—well maybe not with Kia but his past two relationships he did

He was not only confused but nervous and you made him work a little bit to get a date from you but you didn’t hold out for too long since you felt Spencer was your person

You took things slow but you still felt like friends except now you held onto each other a little longer and touches seem to burn now but you liked it, really liked it

Senior year is when he proposes, he’s actually the second out of his group of friends back home to get engaged...JJ was the first and actually went through with the marriage after one drunken night in vegas with some girl who was studying physical therapy

Sure it’s only been two years but like your grandmother always says, “when you feel a pull in your heart whenever they’re not around, they’re the one baby.” And your grandparents got married only after knowing each other for four months. Every love is different

You were a sappy mess and Spencer found it humorous while slipping the ring on and embracing you, “we not doing that. Save it until the wedding, huh?”

And he gets a few nice whacks to the chest but he can take it ofc as he’s kissing you so gently

It’s a private moment and you wouldn’t have it any other way

A year and a few months after you graduate, Spencer gets drafted into the NFL and you’re still searching for a job you majored in

You’re both living apart with you going back to your hometown in Arizona and Spencer in Cali. Things aren’t easy but you’ve been planning your wedding and it feels like Spencer is just saying he’s okay with everything which is frustrating. You don’t want to do this alone and you need to find a place to live together, you didn’t want to live with Spencer’s mom and brother as much as you loved them. You were both adults and needed to take the wheel

Yet it always felt like Spencer was busy planning on putting further distance between you since he was secure in his career and you just felt stuck

That caused a riff between you two but Spencer didn’t like that silent treatment bs. You were gonna talk to him one way or another

Once you get through it, which you definitely do!! it’s pure heaven and you couldn’t be happier

You get married at a banquet hall

You both have a lot friends and family that’ve invited

Your best friends + sibs are your best men, bridesmaids, maid of honor

Spencer leaves a chair open for his dad up front with his mom and brother 🥲

Initially you were going to have your guests pick whatever seat they wanted and just have your immediate family have the front areas but you knew that would probably end up hectic with the strong personalities you had within your friend and family group so you kept it traditional. Your family/friends on one side and spence’s family/friends on the other

Memorable wedding, you were gorgeous and he was so handsome. You loved when Spencer got dressed up, it did something to you and you couldn’t wait for your honeymoon

It wouldn’t be anything over the top like The Bakers tried to gift you with, you just wanted something simple but nice with the man you loved

You were going to Palm Springs the next morning!!! Spending the night in the hotel

You were going to hold out even longer until the night you reached your honeymoon destination 😌

Spencer wanted the both of you to write your own vows and you sure didn’t know how you would compete with this guy. Spencer James always had a way with words!!!

He ofc had you a sobbing mess again but you knew it was never about out-showing the other

when you seal your marriage with a kiss, his hands rest securely on your hips with your hand cradling his jaw and you’re all smiles as the hall fills with cheers

“I love you, Mrs. James.” He’s got that smirk of a smile on his lips and love in his eyes

“As do I, Mr. James.” And you can’t wipe the smile from your own lips even if you tried

One thing you both know how to do is party so the reception goes on for awhile, until about 3 am even tho you both have to be on the road by 10 or a little later since check in isn’t until early afternoon

You’re both so giddy you can hardly sleep but you eventually do, you in your dress + Spencer in his dress shirt but he’s lost the tie and loosened his pants

Since Palm Springs is a 2 hr drive you’re reminiscing on how you basically taught Spencer how to drive and look at how far he’s come now with the rental you’re both using for 4 days and 3 nights

“so it’s my fault you don’t know how to instruct?” Which leads to harmless bickering over spencer’s road trip playlist

it’s been agreed that you each had an hour to play your playlists then for the left over minutes you’d listen to the radio once you got to your destination

your airbnb is REAL colorful and modern, not exactly your tastes but nonetheless it was your getaway from home. You were used to the desert while spencer? Not so much

“the hell was that?” Spencer is dodging and weaving especially if they fly

“looks like fire ants.” keep your distance.” “Why do you know what that is?” “I get stuck watching discovery channel with my dad when I can’t sleep and he’s always up. I saw one episode about them and we don’t want to mess with those bastards.”

you don’t do much with the rest of your day there, just enjoying each other’s company in the air bnb

You decide to shower while Spencer is ordering y’all your dinner from grubhub and deciding what you’re going to watch on firestick that you bought with you

you tend to take long showers so you’re just about done rubbing shea butter into your skin when Spencer announces that the food is here through the door

when you step out you’re on a mission with your silk robe, bustier, and garter

although you kept your own values of saving yourself until marriage—while Spencer was way more experienced you didn’t feel as nervous to get intimate with the man of your dreams

but that changed the moment his set his eyes on you

“what’s this?” He smirks, popping a fry into his mouth

You’re playing coy as your skin shines, leaning over to steal one of his fries. “My pajamas.”

He’s amused but definitely turned on, “oh aight, so that’s just the norm for you now?”

“I could change.” You pointed back to the where the bathroom sat

“I ain’t say all that, Mrs. James.” Spencer blinks then lifts his head upwards, “c’mere.”

And you move to sit on his lap with excitement even tho you think you hide it pretty well. You’ve always pictured how this would be and you knew from stories from your cousins and friends that half of them didn’t have the most romantic experience...

You didn’t need the rose petals and candles but you knew Spencer was a romantic at heart, plus you had plenty of time to see what was up his sleeve and knew this wouldn’t be the only time as of tonight. You were hoping!!!

“Are we starting dinner?” You ask, wrapping an arm across his shoulders but his eyes are set only on you

“I’m hungry for somethin’ else right now,” his nose presses against your beating throat, “and it just walked in here, looking good enough for this appetite.”

Now he’s kissing on your neck and when he gets to that sweet spot behind your ear he’s got the confirmation he needs but he needs to hear you say it. And he asks with his eyes which you reply with a dip of your head

Now he’s got his hands underneath your thighs, locking your legs around his waist for you and he’s off to your temporary bedroom

He’s always so gentle with you, even when he’s laying you down on this bed

“I promise the next time we do this, I’ll make the place look special for you.” He says into your neck and your nod as you feel the weight of him against you

You’re gasping for breath before he’s been fully touched you yet, “we still have the tub and a couple of days.”

He breathes out a laugh, “that we do. That we do.” Before your lips are brought back together

You know you are loved with the way Spencer touches you and speaks to you even in your most intimate moment

He builds you up before he gives himself all to you. It’s something you heard about, SEEN and knew it was crucial but you didn’t want to put too much logic in this moment. You don’t think you can even think straignt with the way you’re on fire for Spencer rn

And he’s know that but he needs you to be patient, he knows how to take his time. And he should know what he’s doing...he does

He’s seeing what your body likes, he’s watching his face even when you begin to whine for him

He knows when you’re truly ready even when you’re begging

He gives you your first climax with his mouth and you know you need more because you knew how much you loved his lips but you loved them even more now

“even better than I imagined,” he says with a lick of his lips from below before pressing a kiss on your abdomen and you’re still seeing stars

“you okay up there?” He asks. He’s always seeking reassurance from you. That’s too important to him, you’re too important to him

You have to say it as your vision slowly starts to splat back to normal, “I need you i-in— but there’s heat pooling in your cheeks. You’re a bit shy now as you’re getting in your head wondering how you must have sounded or looked in that moment of your first climax but it didn’t seem as if Spencer was disappointed. He seemed just as happy to please

He knows what you need. He worked with your body up to this moment

So he’s kissing up your body, slow and soft. He looks into your eyes before he glances over to grab his wallet from the night stand to grab protection

you didn’t think this far ahead but part of you wanted to know if there was a difference without, ofc you knew the risks without and you had forever to try so you made no comment about the choice to use protection

You wanted to do the honors, and so you did

You were surely in awe to be this close and personal with something you get to have for a lifetime

“Careful, something might fly in there.”

You can’t help but you roll your eyes and snort as Spencer places a kiss to your cheek before he reaches up to lock your hands together and up over your head, your wedding bands contrasting against the bright orange walls and your shea butter skin

“I’m ready.” You whisper, your eyes shifting from Spencer’s deep brown eyes to where your bodies would connect

Spencer hums as he keeps his eyes on yours before lining up, he has to free one of his hands to guide

and your mouth falls open with a slight arch in your back

He doesn’t move right away, he needs to be sure

when you lock both legs around his hips, tugging him closer than close to you, fully allowing him in your space, you then squeeze your hands tighter together, never wanting to let go

Spencer James was all you ever needed and you were more than thrilled to continue this journey of life with him

[obx-paradiseonearth]

Could you do kook boys x reader (reader dating rafe but best friends with all 3) pls🥰

Absolutely! I made it a headcanon I hope that’s okay! Enjoy lovely!

// Dating Rafe and Being Best Friends with Kelce and Topper //

You started out as best friends, you’ve known them all since middle school, you were ridiculously shy and they were the type of boys who were super loud, always trying to make the shy people speak

You know the type, the idiot boys who are always like “why don’t you talk? You know you can talk, right?”

Yeah, the idiot boys

Well one day you just weren’t having a good day, bad hair day, homework done but not well, and you tripped on your way in the door; you were basically verging on a level five meltdown and god help the people who push you over the edge

A.K.A. Rafe Cameron, Topper Thornton, and Kelce Smith

“Hey, Princess-” that’s what they’d been calling you for weeks, it made you seeth and blush at the same time, “saw that fall earlier, it looked kind of nasty. You ok?”

You had rolled your eyes, closing your locker a little louder than you had intended to but you honestly didn’t care, “what do you care, Thornton?”

Their eyes had widened and you would have laughed if you weren’t already fuming, your fingers clamped around your biology textbook- that’s another thing for the list, you despised biology- half a second away from slamming someone’s head into the ground, yours included

“We’re just worried, Prin-”

“Don’t you say it, Cameron. Don’t fucking say it.” You had bit out, stepping towards him, your free hand curled in a fist

Kelce had laughed at that, slapping Rafe on the back, “you fucking heard her man. Little mama finally found her voice. I’m proud.”

Your cheeks had gone hot instantly but you didn’t step down, “not much better, Smith.”

“Yeah, well tough,” he had grabbed your textbook, stacking it on his identical one, “you coming or what?”

That was it, that was all it took for you to be one of them, it all happened super fast to be honest, after that you started sitting with them at lunch- well, they started sitting with you- and hanging out after school, they started closing ranks around you in every class and in the hallway, you were untouchable from that moment

They were pretty hardcore too, always around- not that you minded- and always tensing when other people gave you weird looks, Rafe especially, always ready to swing at someone for simply walking past you wrong, his jaw always tight in the cafeteria and hallway

You would ask them for the first year a lot why they even hung out with you

One night the summer before freshman year of high school you were especially persistent

“I’m serious guys, what’s the deal?” You were at the beach, digging your toes into the sand as you watched the sun set.

Rafe and Kelce were rough housing, rolling around on the surf and howling with laughter, Topper was next to you, handing you a diet coke with his eyebrows furrowed

“What do you mean?”

You had bitten your lip, feeling a little ridiculous, “why are we friends?”

At this point Rafe and Kelce were listening too, their eyes glued to you, “why not?”

“I just said I’m being serious, Top. I mean it, I don’t understand. I’m a nobody and yet all of a sudden you guys are always around, in full force, a fucking brigade. Is this a joke or something? Make the loner girl part of the club and then drop her? Are you guys fucking hazing me? I'm going to go into freshman year thinking everything will be rosy and you guys are going to dump pigs blood on me or some shit.” All of a sudden you were crying, shoving the bottle into the sand and standing, feeling like the biggest idiot on the planet

“Woah, woah, woah,” Rafe had stood when you did, clearing the space between you much too quickly, “where’s this coming from, Princess? Did someone say something to you? I swear to god if someone fucking said some-”

“No one said anything, ok? Chill out. It just doesn’t make sense. None of this makes any sense.”

The tears were freely flowing by this point, fuelled by both embarrassment and anger, all of the boys speechless, Topper verging on tears himself as he dug his fingers into the surf, trying to think of anything at all he could say but nothing was coming to mind

It was Kelce who finally spoke first, wrapping his arms- sticky from the ocean and hinted with the dregs of sunscreen from earlier- around your shoulders and squeezing tight, “what’s gotten into you, mamas? You’re spiraling on me. Take a breath, yeah? We’re friends with you because we want to be. Does there need to be more reason than that?”

You had thrown your arms around him, your whole body shaking from the tears, “I’m sorry, Kels. It’s just so much. I’m confused.”

Rafe and Topper had pulled it together by now, circling around you, their hands on your back

“We don’t need a reason to be friends with you, What’s so confusing about being liked. You’re fucking amazing.”

“I’m not kidding, Princess. If someone fucking said something.”

“I know, I know. You’ll kick their ass.”

High school rolls around soon after that and things only get more intense, but in a good way, you’re always busy, weekdays and weekends, day and night, always with one or more of them, doing everything together

They get more popular in high school, Topper joining the football team and Kelce joining the track team, leaving you and Rafe to spend more time together alone, going to their games and track meets together, dressing up in the school colours and cheering like mad, sitting in the front row together

One night, during one of Topper’s games, you’re on the edge of your seat watching the constant back and forth of the game, tapping your foot and fingers relentlessly, your eyes glued to the field, and all of a sudden you feel someone grab your hand

When you glance down you see a ring- Rafe’s ring- and he rubs his thumb over your wrist, neither of you say anything but that’s the first time you realize you feel something different for the boy, he’s your best friend but he’s also more

All of a sudden you start getting nervous around him, dropping your books and stumbling over your words when he’s around, feeling your heart pick up whenever he sits next to you, especially when Kelce calls shotgun in Topper’s Range Rover and the two of you get shoved into the backseat together

One night in particular you guys drive out of town to go to a drive in movie theatre that Kelce has been raving about and like usual you and Rafe are forced into the back- lately that has been happening more and more- and you zone out, lost in the movie, when you feel a hand on your thigh

Obviously it’s Rafe’s, warm and curled around your leg, and he leans over, his mouth right next to your ear, “come cuddle, Princess.”

You nod at him, not trusting your words, and he wraps his arms around your hips, stretching his legs on the back seat and pulling you onto his lap, his head on your shoulder, his hands now around your stomach, you’re certain he can feel your heart pounding through your back which is pressed against his chest

He smells like oranges and you can’t even pretend to focus on the movie anymore, your attention fully on the way his hands smooth up and down your sides, eventually dipping under your t-shirt and splaying against your ribs

“Rafe-” you have to whisper in order to not catch the attention of Topper and Kelce who are absorbed in the movie- “what are you doing.”

“I like you,” his lips find your jaw, his hands squeezing your ribs, “like a lot. I can’t stop fucking thinking about you.”

Your breath catches when he says that, tensing on his lap, wondering if he’s being serious or if he’s just playing at something, “don’t play games with me, Rafe. It’s not nice.”

He grabs your jaw, pulling your eyes to meet his serious ones, “haven’t I more than proven that I don’t mess around when it comes to you? I like you, Princess. Fuck, I could say I lo-”

“Don't say it, Rafe. Please. We’re best friends.”

Your heart is pounding, your heart in your throat. You want him to say it, more than anything, but it’ll complicate things in your circle and these boys mean more to you than anything in the world and you don’t want to risk losing Topper and Kelce in the process

“I don’t care, I love you.”

Your whole body lights on fire when he says it, your veins singing to life in the dark backseat as he tightens his hold on you, his eyes searching yours for any indication that you feel the same way

“Rafe, I-”

“Just say you love me back. I’ll let it go but I need to hear you say it once.”

“Of course I love you, Rafe Cameron. You’re an idiot if you think for a second that I don’t.”

He doesn’t waste any time opening the door, pushing you gently out of the car and tossing a quick “we’re going to get popcorn, be back in a few” to Topper and Kelce

He tugs you behind the concession building, pushing you against the brick, his hands on your hips, his blue eyes dark and burning into yours, his eyebrows pulled together, his lips pursed, like he’s trying to figure something out

Meanwhile your heart is pounding so hard you’re pretty sure it’s trying to escape your chest, you feel like you could throw up from all the adrenaline pumping through your veins, every second feels like minutes and by the time a minute passes you feel like you’ve been staring at Rafe for hours, on edge and wanting nothing more than to pull him impossibly closer to you

“Rafe come on what are you-”

Just like that he snaps out of it, pulling you by your hips towards him and planting his mouth against yours, kissing you like a madman, his lips hot and surprisingly soft, his mouth tasting like the candy he had bought at the gas station on the way here, pushing your back against the brick and slipping his hand around the back of your neck, every movement desperate and perfect at the same time

“I thought you were going let it go,” you mumble between kisses, your hands tangled in his hair

“Changed my mind, Princess,” he quips back, his mouth never leaving yours

You head back to the car a few minutes later, quite reluctantly, your heart pounding still but this time from the thought of sharing what you had just done with your other best friends. You obviously can’t keep it a secret- that never works it only makes the rift bigger- but the thought of them distancing themselves is terrifying

You silently slip back into the backseat, your hands shaking and your lips swollen, it’s silent for a few seconds, the air tangibly thick, your stomach rolling once more, until you’re ready to snap

“So, where’s the popcorn, huh?” Topper’s eyes meet yours from the rearview mirror and you almost barf, your eyes starting to water

And then they laugh

They fucking laugh

Like hooting, barking, howling laughter

And you’re beyond confused, your body buzzing, until you finally force a “what?” out of your mouth

“Mamas, you didn’t seriously think he wouldn’t tell us did you?”

“He’s been planning this for like a whole two months you idiot. Surprised you didn’t see it coming actually. It was so fucking obvious.”

“Gee, thanks Top. Love the support.”

“Stop you know you love me.”

Rafe just slides an arm around your waist, pulling you back to him and laughing with Kelce, “had to keep it a secret.”

“So does this mean none of you hate me?”

“Mamas, chill, you could kill a city of people and I still wouldn’t hate you.”

Nothing really changes after Rafe tells you he loves you, you start dating but you’re still as thick as thieves with Kelce and Topper, still hanging out with them as you always had before, going on drives with Topper and helping Kelce study for his English homework

Really the only thing that changes is that you make-out more with Rafe, it’s a notable change too, that boy is dangerous with his mouth, but he’s still your best friend at the end of the day

If anything you’re less nervous now that you’re out of that weird confusing period of time where you didn’t know what you felt

When winter formal rolls around you all still go together as you had planned at the beginning of the year, Kelce spikes the punch- also as planned- and you spend the whole night giggling with them about the most stupid shit

“Has anyone else seen Tommy Galagher’s tie? I think I’m going to seriously barf if I have to keep looking at it.”

You slap Topper’s chest lightly, trying not to laugh at the true statement, “then stop looking at it, Top. You’re an idiot.”

He slings an arm over your shoulder, scoffing lightly, “says the girl looking at it right now like you want to burn it.”

You do laugh this time, tugging on his jacket, “I didn’t say you were wrong, did I?”

“Okay, but has anyone checked out how fine Mrs. Campbell is looking this evening?” Kelce pipes in and all four of you burst into a fit of giggles

You dance with Rafe to all the slow songs, your head on his chest and his arms tight around you, smiling when you hear the occasional “go get her tiger” from Kelce

Eventually you ditch the event, going back to Kelce’s place and changing into casual clothes before heading to the beach for a bonfire, just the four of you despite the fact that all of you- including you- had been invited to numerous after parties

You bring a few beach blankets, spreading them near the dunes and falling into a huge pile of limbs and more giggles, the top half of your body on top of Rafe’s chest, Topper’s head on your lap, Kelce sitting next to you, his hand in yours, pleasantly drunk and pretending like he knows anything at all about palm reading

Topper points at a few stars, spouting out names and stories about them that he definitely made up, causing everyone to laugh again, Rafe’s chest shaking under your cheek, his arms falling around your shoulders as you slowly drift off to the lull of your best friends and your boyfriend

You couldn’t ask for anything better than this

I hope you like it and feel free to send in ideas <3

[max1461]

what if, we locked eyes across the room for but a second, sharing a single moment of intimacy before i glanced away, blushing and escaped to another room to calm my nerves? 😳

ooh yes definitely. actually this reminds me of a story.

so when i was in high school, i was reasonably sheltered and also went to a tiny tiny school with literally 40 other students total, the upshot being that i felt i was severely lacking in variety of human engagement. and in light of this i came up with a mental list of things i wanted to do in college, most of them being like "have interaction of type X" basically, because i had not had many types of interaction.

and one of them was "have a deep conversation with a total stranger in which we share our most personal thoughts with one another and muse about life etc, and then never see each other again". right because that's the sort of thing that people who are LIVING LIFE etc do in movies and so forth.

and anyway, i honestly didn't expect most of the things on my list to actually happen. they were all like that, highly romantic (not in the sense of love, but in the sense of like ya know, romanticization). BUT, my freshman year, i took the the class "basic acting" (also the only class i ever got a B in, because apparently my acting was too fucking basic even for them). and anyway one of the things we had to do for this class was go see this play at a theater like several hours away, in which (not coincidentally) our acting professor had the leading role. and they had a buss for us to take us all to the thing right, and i guess there was another class that had an entirely unrelated field trip in the same place, and so guess what we were all going in this same bus.

anyway i sat towards the back of the bus, and somehow started up idly talking to the girl from the other class in the seat behind me. but this was like a multi-hour buss ride. and anyway our conversation just... kept going. and i'm not sure what it was, but we talked about like every conceivable subject. over the course of this like 4 hour bus ride we talked about philosophy and politics and sex and like our life aspirations and shit. it was like, a WOAH DUDE moment. and then when the bus came to a stop, we were like "ok i guess i'll see you around, !" and realized we had not at any point asked each others names. and so we told each other our names, but i don't think we ever ended up meeting again, and i now don't remember what her name even was. she probably doesn't remember mine either but i bet she remembers that conversation.

1000/10 life experience, would do again.

[invisibleanonymousmonsters]

I used to be seventeen.

Character: Steve Rogers x Tall!Reader – High School AU

Summary: Steve Rogers doesn’t think fondly of his teenage years. Well, there was one thing he did remember fondly – or, more specifically, one person. 

Word Count: 4,300 - One Shot

Warnings: Bullying, homophobic themes 

Steve always hated coming back home. Yes, he loved seeing his mom and friends. But even the glamour of the holiday glow couldn’t get rid of the bitterness Steve held for his hometown.

He didn’t know how Bucky convinced him to meet him at the one of the town’s few bars. But there he was, walking into the divey establishment. To be fair, it did feel cozy with all the wood and the hundreds of Christmas lights that probably had nothing to do with the holiday season.

Steve was grateful when he spotted Bucky at the bar, not wanting to be the first to arrive.

Before he made it to Bucky, he felt someone jump on his back in an involuntary piggyback.

“Who could this possibly be?” Steve joked when he heard the giggle in his ear.

They jumped down, and he turned to find Rebecca Barnes smiling up at him.

“Stevie! I haven’t seen you since last Christmas! What the fuck?”

Steve narrowed his eyes. “I believe Bucky and I have both invited you to New York multiple times.”

“I know. I know. It’s just hard getting enough days off of work to make the trip from San Francisco worth it.”

“I hear ya,” Steve said as he pulled her in for a proper hug.

They both made their way to Bucky and ordered some drinks.

Bucky and Steve had both lived in New York City after college.

Steve had gone to SAIC in Chicago for art school. Bucky had gone to Columbia for engineering.

They both hated the 4 years where they were apart. Bucky told Steve that he would love New York City and convinced him to move into a place in Brooklyn together after college graduation.

Bucky enjoyed going home to their small town. It didn’t hold the bad memories for him like it did for Steve. It was all healthy nostalgia and a place of comfort to him. He had been popular, a jock. Even though he was smart and nice to everyone, he was a golden boy at their high school.

Why Bucky ever befriended him was still a mystery to Steve.

Steve’s high school experience was rather different. His puberty was delayed. He was short and scrawny. He preferred the arts over sports. He was on the shyer side. All of these things mixed together apparently made him an easy target for the bullies. Not even his friendship with Bucky Barnes could save him.

It hadn’t usually happened in front of Bucky. And if it did, he stopped it countless times. But no matter how hard he tried, Bucky couldn’t put a stop to the bullying completely nor could he be Steve’s full-time body guard.

That time was past Steve now. 

But he still hated coming “home.” Besides his mom, there was nothing left for him in this stupid town. The only people he stayed in contact with from that time were Bucky and Rebecca, and he lived with Bucky now.

“We’re doing tequila shots!” Rebecca cried out.

“Dear God, Becs. Calm down,” Bucky groaned.

“Nope! The three of us haven’t been together in forever. We must get properly wasted. Tis the law.”

Bucky gave Steve a look and just shrugged with a smile. It wasn’t like they had to work tomorrow. It was Christmas Eve and they were technically both on vacation for the holidays for the whole week.

An hour later, Steve was happily buzzed. Rebecca was talking to friends she had kept in touch with after high school. Steve and Bucky kept to themselves. Every so often someone would come over and say hi to Bucky.

No one said hi to Steve.

He couldn’t figure out if it was because they didn’t care to or because they legitimately didn’t recognize him. 

Steve was a different person since high school. He finally had his growth spurt during his freshman year of college, now standing at 6’1. And it seemed his body decided to actually hold a few pounds instead of keeping his frame stick thin. On top of that, Steve started taking his health to a new level. Bucky would tease him that he looked more like he was a Big 10 football player than an art student. The beard probably didn’t help his past peers from recognizing him either.

Bucky was in the middle of telling Steve about his most recent date when the bells chimed, signaling a new person entering the bar.

Steve did a double take when he instantly recognized her.

He swore his heart dropped to his stomach.

Bucky caught his friends expression and how he was staring over his shoulder. He quickly turned around to see what Steve was gawking at.

“Oh, Jesus,” Bucky muttered under his breath.

Y/F/N Y/L/N.

Steve would never forget her name, even with his passionate efforts to forget all of high school.

There was a cry of cheers from a group of girls at her arrival. Steve recognized them as her friends from back in the day. They were some of the few people that hadn’t harassed him. They seemed to pity him…just like she had.

Y/N looked amazing.

She stood out for multiple reasons. The first being her height. But Steve noticed she wasn’t slouching like she had in high school, always trying to make herself appear smaller and getting down to everyone else’s level. Now her shoulders were back and her head was held high. Then he noticed the heeled booties. She had never even considered wearing heels when she was in high school. Now she wore them proudly.

The second reason was her clothes. They were far too stylish for their small, close-minded town. But she didn’t seem to notice the second glances or the judgmental looks.

The final reason was because she was beautiful. At least, Steve had always thought so. Turned out, even after 10 years, Steve’s heart still beat a little faster when he saw her.

“You’re staring,” Bucky pointed out.

Steve cleared his throat and forced himself to look away from Y/N as she hugged all of her friends and had a beaming smile.

“Shut up,” he muttered as he took a big gulp of his drink.

“Why don’t you go say hi?” Bucky asked with a mischievous smirk.

“As if she’d even remember me…” Steve mumbled.

“I wouldn’t be so sure about that.”

Bucky didn’t push him more and kept talking. 

But Steve was thrust back into memories he hadn’t repressed for quite some time. But seeing Y/N just thrust them to the forefront of his mind.

———————

Steve was struggling to put all his sketches back in his folder as he rushed through the halls. There were just a few finishing touches that needed to be made on one of them when the bell rang. Now he was going to be late to his next class.

He was about to turn the corner when someone slammed his books and folders out of his grasp. His jaw dropped as he saw dozens of his loose sketches go flying around the hall.

He looked up to see his assailant.

Brock Rumlow.

Next to him was his best friend, Jack Rollins, and a few of the other guys on the football team.

Steve ignored them and crouched down to pick up the papers, taking the higher ground for once. He wasn’t in the mood and he didn’t want to get another tardy. Nor did he want to get another detention for fighting.  

But Brock wasn’t letting him go so easily. He crouched down and picked up a drawing. It just happened to be one of Bucky. Steve had asked him to sit for him a couple of weekends to practice his portrait drawing skills.

“Fucking Christ! You really are in love with him. I don’t understand why Barnes lets your gay ass hang out with him,” Brock growled before ripping the drawing into pieces.

Then he picked up another one, it was of a woman. But just her lips and down to her clavicle. Steve prayed Brock wouldn’t recognize who it was based off of. He should, if his crush on Y/N was as strong as he pretended it was. In Brock’s mind, she belonged to him despite her never reciprocating the feelings.

Steve didn’t want that one to get ripped up.

He lunged forward, trying to grab it from Brock’s grasp.

This was exactly what Brock wanted. He picked on people he knew he could beat to make himself feel strong.

Before Steve could even tackle Brock to the ground, he pushed Steve to the ground so hard that Steve’s head slammed back onto the hard tile, even blinding his vision for a moment. 

“Is that a fucking joke, Rogers?” Brock laughed at him

Then he reached for Steve’s collar and pulled him onto his feet again.

“You really think you could even land a hit on me?” Brock whispered. He raised his hand to hit him, most likely in the gut. Brock seemed to like watching Steve keel over in pain.

“Brock!” A voice screamed from behind Steve. “What the fuck is wrong with you?”

Steve stopped breathing when he recognized the voice.

Y/N.

“What?” Brock asked innocently and immediately let Steve go.

“I saw what you did,” Y/N accused, making sure to put herself between Steve and him.

“He was asking for it,” Brock shrugged. “He was walking to class, asshole.” She glared at him. “Just because your shit got rocked on the football field last game doesn’t mean you can just take out your embarrassment and anger on another person.”

“Whatever,” Brock rolled his eyes and then walked away with his friends. But he gave Steve a final glare that said, ‘You’re lucky this time.’

Y/N finally turned to look at Steve. “Are you OK? I saw how hard he shoved you.”

“I-I’m fine,” Steve stuttered.

“Are you sure? Maybe you should go to the nurse. I really think you could have a concussion.”

But Steve just shook his head.

Y/N sighed but didn’t continue arguing. Instead, she started helping him pick up all his papers.

“You’re really good at drawing,” she said as she looked at a portrait of his mom before handing it to him.

Steve blushed. “Thanks.”

The bell interrupted them.

“Shit,” Steve cursed under his breath. “I’m gonna be late again.”

“What class are you going to?” She asked.

“Math.”

She bit her lip. “With Foster?”

He nodded.

“I’ll walk you there.”

Before he could protest, she grabbed one of his folders, the one with all of the drawings and started walking towards Mr. Foster’s classroom.

The class had already started when they walked in.

Steve’s cheeks blushed once again as all eyes in the classroom went to him and Y/N.

“Y/N, what brings you here?” Mr. Foster asked pleasantly instead of reprimanding Steve for being late once again.

“I ran into Steve in the hallway – literally. I made a mess of his papers and was just helping him pick them up.”

Steve watched as she gave him a shy smile and played up her guilt.

“Well, that was nice of you,” Mr. Foster said.

Steve went to his seat before he could remind his teacher that he wasn’t on time. He looked up at the doorway to give Y/N a thankful look, but she had already disappeared and the door was slowly closing.

And that wasn’t the last time she saved him from bullies.

The next time was a month or so later. It wasn’t Brock that time. He’d learned not to pick on people while Y/N was present. He knew he’d never gain her affections that way.

This time it was one of his lackeys.

“Hey, Rogers? Can’t find any clothes that fit you properly?”

Steve ignored him.

“Have you tried looking in the little boys section? Maybe try Babies R Us!”

That didn’t make Steve turn around. What made him turn around was the sound of someone being shoved into the lockers.

Steve whipped around, fully expecting Bucky to be his savior.

Instead it was Y/N, who had her forearm crammed against his bully’s throat. Y/N was towering over him. She was taller than most of the boys in their school. But somehow no one picked on her for it.

“What the hell?” The kid said, struggling to say words with the pressure on his throat.

“I hear you pick on him again and I’ll make sure the whole school sees me kick you in the dick,” she told him.

Steve was stunned, convincing himself he was imagining all of it. 

But the kid nodded his head.

Y/N knew none of the guys would ever hit a girl. Even if they wanted to, she was taller and probably stronger than most of them. So she used that privilege to her advantage.

She let him go. A group of her girlfriends laughed at the bully as she returned to them. Before she disappeared down the hall, she gave Steve a small, reassuring smile.

Steve wondered if she felt the same way about being tall as he felt about being short. Maybe that’s why she felt the need to defend him.

But Y/N’s attention toward him didn’t stop there.

Steve wouldn’t consider them friends. But Y/N did acknowledge him at school quite frequently. If she managed to meet his gaze, she’d give him a little smile and maybe a wave.

When Bucky caught on, Steve waited for him to tease him about it, since Bucky could tell Steve’s crush immediately. But he gave Steve his space and they never really fully talked about it. It was just known from then on. 

————

Steve’s mind raced through all his memories like flashes. But then it seemed to settle on the last time he ever talked to Y/N.

————

It was the night of prom.

But Steve wasn’t there.

Bucky begged him to tag along with him and his date. But Steve knew Dot would not be fond of that, despite her forcing a smile and nodding when Bucky recommended it.

So Steve decided to go to a coffee shop. It was one of the few places he liked in their stupid town. It was open late and had plenty of space. Every once in awhile, he’d go there to just sketch or read. It was just an excuse to get out of the house and go somewhere.

Now he sat at in his usual corner that had good lighting and a bigger table, which was good for drawing.

Steve was listening to music, drinking coffee, and sketching away. 

But for some reason, a new patron coming in made him look up.

He did a double take when he recognized Y/N.

She walked in and looked a bit like a tomboy. She was wearing boyfriend jeans, a graphic tee, a baseball hat, and a zip-up with the hoodie pulled up. Yet Steve recognized her immediately.

He tried not to stare, but definitely wasn’t successful. He watched as she ordered a latte and two chocolate chip cookies.

Why wasn’t she at prom?

She turned and her eyes were going around the coffee shop, trying to find a table she wanted. That was when she spotted Steve.

With her latte and cookies in hand, she slowly made her way to Steve.

“Hey,” she said quietly with a smile, as if not to disturb the few other customers. 

“Hi,” he responded.

For the first time, he didn’t feel ridiculously nervous talking to her.

“Do you mind if I sit for a bit?” She asked.

Steve was shocked.

“You can say no. I won’t be offended,” she laughed.

“N-No, of course. Please, sit.”

She smiled and sat down.

“Shouldn’t you…uhh…be at prom?” Steve asked shyly.

Y/N let out a breathy laugh. “Well… no one asked me.”

Steve’s brow furrowed. That seemed impossible. “That can’t be true.”

She rolled her eyes will a smile. “Think about it, Steve. Yeah, I have some guy friends I could’ve gone with…but they all have girlfriends.” She took a sip of her latte. “It’s fine. I don’t really like dances. I only really like the whole dressing up part.”

Then she looked down at her tomboy outfit and started laughing. “Not that you would know by how I’m dressed right now. I look like a little boy.”

Steve smiled. “No, you don’t. You always look beautiful.”

Y/N sat up straighter, completely taken by surprised from his compliment. Steve shifted in his seat and dipped his head. “Sorry, I didn’t mean to make you uncomfortable…”

“You didn’t make me uncomfortable,” she replied with a grin.

He let out a sigh.

“So, why aren’t you at prom?” She countered.

“Ummm…doubt anyone would’ve said yes if I had asked,” he mumbled.

Y/N squinted at him.

“What?” Steve asked.

“You do realize that you’re like the sweetest guy in our grade, right? I know so many girls who didn’t get asked that would’ve loved to have gone. And they would’ve been more than happy to have gone with you, too.”

Steve blushed. “Whatever you say.”

Y/N then looked around them shyly. “Do you mind if I just stay here and read my book? I won’t bother you. You can just keep drawing.” Then she smiled at him. “Again… you can say no and I won’t be offended.”

“No, no, no,” Steve quickly said. Then he winced. “I mean, ‘no, I’m not going to tell you no.’ Not ‘no to your offer.’”

Y/N smirked at his fumbling.

So the two of them sat together in a comfortable silence. Y/N read her book and Steve continued his drawing.

He wanted to ask her a million things. He wanted to get to know her. The real her, not the the person everyone at school thought she was. But this – this whole just appreciating each other’s quiet presence was nice too. Steve didn’t know how to explain it, but it made him think it was more meaningful than asking her a million questions.

At one point, she pushed her plate toward him, silently offering him her other cookie.

That was the last time Steve talked to her. 

He saw her at graduation, but they were never close enough for any sort of interaction. She was surrounded by her friends and family. He was just with his mom and the Barnes family.

————

And that was it. 

They both went off to college and Steve never saw her again.

Until tonight.

The bar got a bit more crowded. But Bucky, Rebecca, and Steve stayed in their little area. Every so often, Rebecca and Bucky would get pulled into other groups of old friends, but they’d always find their way back. Steve didn’t mind.

It was towards the end of the night when Steve went to the bar to get another round of drinks for them. He was very happily buzzed. The miserable feeling of being back in his childhood town was just a bit weaker – for the time being.

“I don’t know why I expected you to come over and say hi. You always were so shy.” A voice said beside him.

Steve quickly turned to find Y/N leaning on the bar waiting for his attention.

“Hi,” was all he managed to blurt out.

“Hi,” she laughed. “I gotta be honest: I almost didn’t recognize you.”

Her eyes went up and down, taking in his tall frame. She used to tower over him. Now, even with her heels on, he was just a tad bit taller than him.

He chuckled awkwardly, never knowing what to say when people noted how much he’d physically changed.

“Can I make up for it by buying you a drink?”

She smirked and nodded. “You may.”

They chatted for a bit, friendly banter. Before Steve could use Rebecca and Bucky’s drinks as an excuse to leave the conversation, Becca practically came skipping over to take them away and return to her brother. She gave Steve a look that said, ‘Don’t you dare try to leave this conversation, idiot.’

“So what are you doing now? Where do you even live?” She asked Steve.

“New York. I’m an artist,” he decided to keep it generic.

“No way. I live in New York, too.”

Steve paused. “No shit? I’m in Brooklyn – Williamsburg, actually.”

“Ahh… Well, that would explain why we’ve never run into each other. I’m in Nolita.”

“So trendy,” Steve teased. “Though, I’m not surprised.” Then he gestured towards her outfit.

She acted offended. “And what is that supposed to mean?”

“You were always stylish. Nolita suits you. It’s a compliment, I promise. What do you do for work?”

She hesitated for a second. “I’m a stylist.”

“No shit,” Steve said in awe. “Like celebrities or…?”

“Yeah, a lot of celebrities, actually. They’re pretty much all of my clientele.”

“I’m sure you’ve got some crazy stories,” he pointed out.

She laughed and shrugged.

“You seeing anyone?” Steve asked then. “In New York, I mean.”

It didn’t feel awkward or forced, just like it was the natural next step in their conversation.

Y/N winced slightly and sighed. She didn’t look him in the eye. “Being a tall, successful, and independent woman doesn’t exactly have men lining up in New York City…”

Before Steve could say anything, Y/N laughed. “It’s like prom all over again,” she joked. 

But he wasn’t laughing exactly. “Well then, I think the same thing I did that night at the coffee shop.”

She tilted her head. “And what’s that?”

“Men are fucking idiots. All of them.”

She threw her head back and laughed. “Even you?”

“Oh, me more than any of them.”

“What! Why would you say that?”

Then his laughter died down and he took a sip of his drink, a little liquid courage. “Because…if I had known no one had asked you to prom, I would’ve taken you – in a fucking heartbeat.”

“You didn’t know,” she pointed out in a sigh. “But you did know so many other girls who didn’t have dates.”

He shook his head. “They weren’t who I wanted to go with.”

Her smile dropped ever so slightly, catching on to what he was trying to say.

Y/N cleared her throat. “We probably shouldn’t live in the past. It’s not like it would do us any good.”

“But I’m the same person,” Steve challenged suddenly.

She looked at him, waiting for him to say he was joking. “You’ve probably changed more than anyone we went to high school. I mean, look at you!”

Y/N grabbed her coat and Steve stood up without thinking and helped her back into it. The gesture seemed to catch her off guard.

Then they realized how close they were standing to each other because of it.

“You didn’t ask me,” Steve said quietly.

Her eyes flickered from his eyes down to his lips without meaning to. “Ask you what?”

“If I was seeing anyone…”

She sort of scoffed at the idea. “I’m sure you’re seeing many people, Steve.”

“That’s not even remotely accurate,” he chuckled lowly.

Her eyes softened then. “You’re one of the good guys, Steve Rogers. And sadly, the older I get, the more I realize how few of you there really are in the world.”

Steve didn’t know how to respond to that.

A beat passed between them. It was filled with opportunity. Make a move, a part of his head was screaming at him. No, don’t be an idiot, was the other part.

And then the moment passed just as quickly as it arrived. And Steve missed his chance.

“Well, it was really nice seeing you again,” she told him.

“You too, Y/N.” He blinked. “Here, let me get you an car home.”

“Oh, you don’t–”

“If I hadn’t been drinking, I’d drive you myself,” he cut her off before she could actually argue.

5 minutes later, he was closing the passenger door for her and he watched the car drive away.

When he walked back into the bar, Bucky and Rebecca were giving him a sympathetic look. They already knew he let her go without trying. Because they knew him better than he knew himself sometimes.

“Don’t,” he warned them both.

“I think…we should do another round of tequila shots!” Rebecca announced.

“Fine. But then we’re going home before I have to carry you back home over my shoulder,” Bucky warned his little sister.

“Yeah, yeah, yeah. Whatever,” she shooed as she went to the bar.

Steve was quiet for the rest of the night, thinking about everything Y/N and him had said to each other that night.

---------------

Steve woke up the next morning with the worst headache of his life. That’s what he got for drinking the world’s cheapest alcohol.

When he grabbed his phone from the nightstand, he noticed he had a text from a number that wasn’t in his phonebook.

He opened it to read: “Barnes told me to text you so you didn’t ‘make the same mistake twice.’”

Steve swore his heart stopped. There was no one else it could be .

With a smile, he texted back, “I’m gonna beat that punk up later.”

To his surprise, she texted back right away. “So, are you saying he was wrong to give me your number?”

Steve thought for a moment. “No, he was definitely right to do so. Apparently, I’m incapable of doing anything for myself.” He hesitated. Enough of being safe and careful. Might as well go for it. “As soon as I closed that car door, I regretted not asking for your number.”

“You know...we don’t have to just be people from each other’s past.”

“What are you doing for New Year’s Eve?”

“Nothing.”

Steve smiled. “Well, that’s not the case anymore. I’ll see you in NYC, Y/N.”

-----------------

So, a lot of the reader was basically me in high school and a lot of it was not. I’ll let you guys figure that out for yourself. 

Let me know what you thought of it!

Oh the title was inspired by “Seventeen” by Sharon Van Etten. 

[everybodyscupoftea]

hockey!jj: road to the nhl

the ncaa and the stress of being an nhl prospect

@sunnypogue​​ and i are back at it folks - and with this, we’ve finally established all of jj’s backstory

(the next thing we’re working on is the masterlist linking all of our hockey!jj and coho!rafe content - we’re posting on both of our blogs and @sunnypogue​ has a ton of coho!rafe stuff written already for you to catch up on his backstory)

warnings: cursing

Ward knew the Major-Junior leagues were a great opportunity and that they funneled players straight into the NHL - JJ’s end goal

The OHL came knocking as soon as JJ was draft eligible, but the idea of leaving the outer banks during high school to move somewhere way up north to play with even richer kids than he already did was intimidating to him

Then Rafe started looking at college hockey and opened the ncaa option to JJ, which he much preferred

As soon as Ward learned that JJ was considering college hockey, he started contacting coaches from the top hockey schools in the nation

Ward had a whole whiteboard full of schools and corresponding contacts posted up in his office

He sent out JJ’s highlight tape to any D1 school he could get in touch with

(JJ was oblivious - just playin’ hockey & working at the mechanics in his free time)

Actually, outside of playing hockey, JJ had very little to do with the process

Ward would send the emails, field the calls, etc.

Ward even accompanied him on a few recruiting trips, asking all the right questions.

(Did Ward miss one of Rafe’s games to attend the BU recruiting trip? Yes.)

And it paid off - JJ had a lot of college offers from some really good schools

Most of which JJ had no idea existed - Quinnipac? Northeastern? Clarkson?

Of course, there were a few he recognized - Michigan, BU, Denver

(tbh his favorite was Arizona State, but Ward refused because - “what kind of hockey did they play on the West Coast?”)

(JJ imagined it was similar to the hockey they played in North Carolina, but kept his mouth shut - for once.)

After much debate, he decided to attend University of North Dakota

JJ had grown up watching Toews & Oshie college highlights - he couldn’t help but have a soft spot for the school

Plus, the concept of living in North Dakota was hilarious to him

Ward moved JJ in mid-June, sticking around for an additional week to “keep an eye on him”

Despite Ward practically adopting JJ, he still didn’t really trust him

JJ caught Ward hovering at his practices, chatting up the coaching staff, the Athletic Director, his RA - JJ could only imagine what Ward was instructing them to do.

JJ dealt with it the way he dealt with most Ward-related things - he put his head down and played hockey.

JJ’s birthday was mid-September, so he had the luxury of being able to enroll at UND without worrying about the upcoming draft - he wasn’t eligible for another year.

UND was great, the guys were really nice and it was like a fresh start for him - no Ward, no Luke.

No one knew he was just a poor kid from some beach town on the Atlantic Coast with a deadbeat dad - he was “just JJ”

Road trips were his favorite - he’d never really gotten to travel in this region of the US before

He loved the bus rides with his teammates - even the early morning ones.

Plus, his teammates actually LIKED him - unlike his travel team back in NC, who never really embraced him as “one of their own”

(Ward said they were jealous - JJ knew better.)

The team was significantly more laidback than his travel team - despite being one of the best teams in the country

Most of the guys weren’t actively trying for the NHL and were a lot more chill which helped his nerves

Some of the older guys were already drafted, allowed to return back to UND for a year or two before joining their respective clubs

They took JJ under their wing, recognizing his talent immediately

They were always willing to hang around after practice, offering an opportunity for JJ to get a couple more drills in, or hit the gym with him a little extra.

They were full of advice for what to do and what not to do as a prospect

One thing they all advised? Attend the combine

JJ got an invite, late his freshman year, opting to attend despite being pretty unknown.

No one was really talking about him, this scrappy kid from North Carolina, who somehow got a full ride to UND.

He had a pretty impressive combine despite being on the smaller side; the physical testing went well, even though he almost threw up after the Wingate Test

(The kid before him puked twice)

The team interviews were harder, he was unfamiliar with it, unlike the junior hockey boys, his only experience coming from meeting with college coaches

JJ definitely said the Wrong Thing more than once

Ward had always handled the harder questions, the harder conversations - suddenly JJ was getting asked about his attitude issues, what he thought about legalizing marijuana, what he would do if there was a 25 foot python in a room with him - JJ was LOST.

(Also if he got ONE MORE question about his size, he was going to Lose It.)

He felt really alienated because they all seemed to know each other; it was like an exclusive clique.

Thankfully, one of his older teammates from UND was there too - they stuck together despite not really being good friends.

Somehow, he survived the combine (even after he snarked off in an interview when they questioned him about his height - JJ aptly responded with a “well, I’m taller than you, aren’t I?”)

Ward did not like that one.

His prospect status grew. Teams were very interested in him and he got on the media’s radar. Analysts predicted him going late first round, early second even.

Some of his UND teammates got wind of his newfound popularity and googled his name + elite prospects to check out his page

JJ was a little astounded to see how in depth they’d gone on his stats and a little embarrassed by all the teasing, but it was never mean-spirited

Kinda helped him feel like one of the guys which was unfamiliar after being ostracized in his younger years for not having the same economic status

JJ felt a little sick when he entered the draft.

He had been having a recurring dream where he attended the first and second rounds, only to not get picked at all, left sitting in the stands, desperately waiting to hear his name.

Deep down he knew he’d get selected by someone, but there was the inherent fear that teams hated him and would pass on him.

What if he didn’t get picked at all?

Of course, several teams were interested in him - he had a great freshman year, an excellent showing in the Frozen Four (UND lost in the semis, but JJ really put the team on his back), and his name was popping up all over Twitter as a “sleeper first round pick”

He had been in contact with scouts from Philadelphia, Columbus, Nashville and Dallas - he knew they were interested.

Ward regularly kept up with JJ, checking in to make sure his grades were good and he was getting his workouts in to stay in top form for the draft.

“Scouts are going to start attending your games, if they haven’t already.”

“They’ve even popped up at a few of Rafe’s games - they’ll be at yours.”

(That’s how JJ found out Rafe was interested in trying out for the Canes after graduation)

JJ felt stupid, but he was really praying Carolina wasn’t interested in him - he’d rather go undrafted than end up on a team with Rafe again

Hell, he was hoping they wouldn’t be in the same division, much less the same conference - the less he saw of Rafe, the better.

Silly boy thought he’d be in the AHL

JJ didn’t attend the draft because he wasn’t predicted to go super early (also, you know - the nightmares)

He ended up staying in North Dakota to keep practicing and working out with some of his teammates who stuck around

The night of the first round, the group of them ordered food and hung out in one of the boys apartments to watch together. JJ was pretty sure he wouldn’t go in the first round, but his curiosity won out.

He sat in a corner chair, staring blankly at his hands the majority of the evening, too nervous to really even watch

To his surprise, his name was called late in the first round, the Dallas Stars using the 28th pick on him.

(JJ was pretty dejected at this point - Philly and Nashville had passed him up, despite showing a ton of interest earlier in the week)

He was struck still and wordless, barely registering the boys jumping up and down, shaking him, and screaming all around him

“Fuck, dude, you get to play with Seguin and Benn”

Soon after the first round ended, the Stars GM called and he put it on speaker to talk to him

“We love your game, son, we feel you’ll be a good fit for our team. I’m calling to invite you to prospect camp this year, we want the opportunity to see what you can really do. Can’t wait to see you in a Stars uniform.”

Ward called him next, already talking about getting JJ an agent and flight details to get down to Dallas for camp. It was all a blur, and the fluttering in JJ’s stomach got stronger as he realized he’d really made it.

Well, almost made it.

Prospect camp was insane. He felt like he barely slept, it was just eating, media, and hockey. The facilities were amazing and the other guys were so talented.

The competitive atmosphere was nothing like he’d ever felt before, and he thrived, consistently rising to the challenge.

Everyone wanted an invite to training camp, but spots were limited.

The practices were on another level - JJ was bone tired the whole week, body aching from the constant skating & checking.

Scrimmages were fun - JJ loved playing with guys outside the NCAA, enjoying the challenge that came with playing with talented, older prospects.

At the end, he got an invite to training camp

Playing with actual NHLers, some that he’d even grown up watching, was insane.

He was legitimately starstruck when Joe Pavelski checked him into the boards during a practice scrimmage - it took him a couple of seconds to recover.

JJ was the youngest at training camp by far - living out of a suitcase in a random Dallas hotel, trying to figure out whether he needed to re-enroll at UND or not, fielding daily calls from Ward - it was stressful.

(And apparently, his stress was palpable, because the next day, after practice, Tyler Seguin smacked him on the head, demanding that he meet him for dinner that night at Nick & Sam’s)

(JJ did not know what the fuck Nick & Sam’s was, but he figured it out)

Tyler sat JJ down, ordered him a big ol’ steak, & told JJ to tell him what was on his mind because “you’ve been looking constipated for about a week, now.”

JJ just...unloads on him. Tells him everything he’s stressed about - leaving school, moving to Dallas, whether he’s actually good enough to stay on NHL roster - he’s nearly panting by the time he’s done talking.

Tyler, shockingly, is an excellent listener. He offers advice about signing a contract & reassures JJ that he’s talented (“dude, you’re not going down to Austin. They’d be insane.”).

They also discuss the merits of maybe playing an extra season of NCAA before committing fully to the NHL because he was young and it was intimidating

Tyler gave his perspective and mistakes he made as a bit of a warning to starting too young

If anything, the dinner made JJ more confused about his future - would he fuck everything up if he waited another year? What if he got injured at UND, and never actually made the NHL?

He didn’t sleep that night - or the night after.

Ultimately, Ward ended up deciding for him, pushing him into signing an ELC & leaving UND.

“At least you’re guaranteed some money, son. That’s gotta be enough inspiration.”

[thewickedkings]

Between the Two of Us ~ Chapter 4

Masterlist || Previous Chapter || Next Chapter

Summary: Jurdan High school AU. Rivals Jude and Cardan are forced to partner up  for a history project, and drama ensues. Filled with banter, pranks, an unhealthy amount of pining, and Jude being clueless as usual.

Trigger Warnings: I don’t think there’s anything so far, but please let me know if there’s anything I missed!

It was Thursday morning, and Jude’s nerves thrummed with anticipation. She leaned against a pillar in the school hallway, slowly sipping her coffee. Students milled about, grabbing their books before first period, and Jude stood still, waiting.

Any minute now.

Her eyes caught a head of dark curls in the crowd, and she smiled. Cardan walked obliviously towards their first period class, maneuvering swiftly through the clusters of lingering students.

And then came Amanda Williams from the other end of the hallway, striding purposefully towards Cardan. Amanda Williams was perhaps the most ambitious student in the school, involved in almost every single club in the school and volunteering in all her free time. Jude both admired her and feared her.

Amanda approached Cardan, and Jude watched the scene play out from afar. It made it exceedingly funnier that she couldn’t actually hear what they were saying but had to go off Cardan’s confused, awkward smile and Emily’s enthusiastic hand gestures.

She nearly snorted her coffee when Cardan started backing away, his hands held up in confusion, while Emily followed him unrelentingly.

The bell rang, and Cardan took the opportunity to bolt. He turned around, heading in her direction, but Jude slipped into the crowd before he could spot her.

By the time Jude got to her fifth period class, Jude’s spirits were exceptionally high. She took out her fancy colored pens out from her pencil case cheerfully while she waited for class to begin.

Her careful organization was interrupted when Cardan barged in, storming towards her desk.

“Duarte, you are going to pay for this,” he seethed. He slammed a Save the Turtles flyer on her desk.

“For what?” she responded innocently, rearranging her pens on her desk noncommittally. She looked down at the flyer. “Awww, this turtle’s so adorable. I didn’t know you cared about endangered species. Maybe you do have a heart somewhere in there.”

His palms flattened on her desk as he towered over her. “Jude, I do not have the time to convince thirty people that no, I did not start a club to save the sea turtles, and no, I didn’t know who put up flyers with my name and email on it all over the school saying I did.” He paused, eyes narrowing. “Except wait, I did know.”

It took everything she had not to laugh in his face. She silently thanked the girls she had overheard at lunch a few days ago having a passionate conversation about saving the turtles and metal straws. Still seething from the coffee incident, a plan had begun to form in Jude’s mind. After 10 minutes designing a flyer with a cute little sea turtle and a trip to the school printer, Jude’s plan was in place.

She kept her expression completely serious. “That must have been so hard for you. People can be so annoying sometimes. Just last week, some guy knocked over my coffee, and he didn’t even apologize. Can you imagine?” She bit her lip to stop her smile.

Cardan’s dark eyes flashed. “Jude, I swear I’m going to-”

“Mr. Greenbriar, it seems you’re in the wrong class,” the teacher interrupted.

Jude chirped in. “Sorry. He was just telling me about the club he was starting to save the sea turtles. He’s very passionate about it.”

The lethal glare Cardan sent her way promised vengeance, and she felt a tingle make its way up her spine.

He swallowed, unclenching his fists. When he turned back to the teacher, his expression cleared. “Sorry. Just clarifying something. I’ll leave right now.”

He walked over to the door and shut it carefully behind him, as if resisting the urge to slam it.

Jude leaned back in her chair, satisfaction thrumming through her. Pissing off Cardan just so, so fun.

 ~~~

Jude’s breath came out in pants as she sat on the bench and drank from her water bottle. The soccer game was tied with five minutes to go, and it was taking everything Jude’s team had to keep it that way. Tisdale High was much more formidable than Jude had expected, and Jude’s team was barely managing to stop all their goals, much less make any of their own. 

The referee blew the whistle, and Jude wiped her brow and went back into the game with a renewed vigor. She wasn’t going to settle for a tie, not yet at least.

Jude had started soccer in her freshman year so she could have an extracurricular on her resume and to have some sort of stress-relief, but she’d come to love the adrenaline that came with the sport.

The clock ticked as a girl with neon orange cleats stole the ball from their team again. When the girl made to pass the ball across the field, Jude anticipated her move and shot forward, blocking the ball before it could reach her teammate.

With the ball back in their possession, Jude dribbled up the field, working the ball around the defense. Out of the corner of her eye, Jude saw Nicasia standing to the left of the goal, the perfect angle to make a goal.

Jude hesitated. Just last week, Nicasia had chosen to take a shot for a near-impossible goal instead of passing to Jude, who had been in a clear spot to make the point. They had ended up winning after Jude had scored a goal in the last half, but Jude was angry that Nicasia had brought their antagonism to the field. She’d thought they’d gotten over their differences, but apparently they hadn’t.

All this passed through Jude’s head in a split second. The defense player she had tripped out was gaining on her, and Jude had to make a decision.

In a move they’d trained hundreds of times in practice, Jude faked right and then passed to Nicasia. Nicasia shot the ball straight into the net, and the crowd broke into cheers. Apparently, there was little Jude wouldn’t do if it meant winning.

As the team swarmed her, Jude walked the other way to the side of the field. Just because she had let Nicasia make the goal didn’t mean she would be happy about it.

She flopped onto the grass, letting the adrenaline of the game fade. She looked up at the soft crunch of grass next to her.

“Hey, that was a good game you played. Your pass basically saved the game,” said Locke, sitting down next to her.

“Thanks,” Jude replied, shrugging. His arm grazed hers, and Jude remembered what the Bomb had said, and wondered if her words could be true, if Locke could actually be interested in her.

She suddenly felt self-conscious about the sweat on her body and hoped she didn’t smell too bad. “Do you come to watch our games a lot?”

“I come every once in a while. But I’ve started to come a lot more recently,” he said, giving her a meaningful look.

“Oh.” Jude flushed. Ok, so maybe he was interested in her.

Locke ran his hand through his hair. “Ok, so the real reason I came today was because I was wondering if you would maybe want to get dinner with me tomorrow? Like a… date?”

“Really?” Jude said, before quickly adding, “I mean, yeah, sure!”

Locke grinned at her, and Jude’s mood immediately rose. It was definitely nice to have a guy’s attention, to feel wanted.

After they exchanged numbers, Jude walked over to the bleachers where Vivi and Oak sat. Oak was waiting at the bottom for her.

“Jude, that pass was so good! You stole the ball and then faked to the right, and then…” he chattered excitedly, mimicking her performance with a practice soccer ball.

She felt a rush of affection for him and ruffled his hair. “Thanks, Oakey.” Even though they weren’t related through blood, Jude loved him more than anything.

She spotted Vivi on her phone at the top of the bleachers but stopped when she saw who was sitting in the second row.

“Nice pass,” Cardan said wryly, leaning back and stretching his legs. “No goals today?”

Jude’s eyes narrowed. All of the anger he had shown on Thursday was mysteriously absent from his eyes, meaning he had something planned.

She ignored his comment and asked, “What are you doing here?”

“I can’t show some school spirit?”

“No.”

He huffed out a laugh. “Ok, ok, there’s something I have to talk to you about.”

“Yeah, no thanks.” She didn’t have the patience for Cardan’s antics right now. She was in actually in a good mood after Locke had asked her out and wanted it to last.

She moved to maneuver around him, but he snagged her wrist. “Wait.”

She paused at the touch, the warmth of his skin seeping into hers.

When he noticed her gaze on his hand, he dropped her hand as quickly as he had grabbed it. “I need your number for the project.”

She looked at him suspiciously, wondering if this was for one of his schemes.

“Jude, we have assignments due. How else are we supposed to communicate?”

“Fine. Give me your phone.”

He pulled it out of his pocket and stood up, and suddenly they were standing too close, only mere inches separating them. She shuffled backwards, forgetting they were on bleachers, and the back of her thighs hit the row behind her. She stumbled, her hand flying out instinctively and grabbing Cardan’s arm for balance.

She quickly pulled her hand away, but not before she felt the muscle beneath her palm. Her body suddenly became hyperaware of his physicality, making her cheeks burn.

“If you wanted to touch me, you don’t have to pretend to fall over.” He looked down at her, eyes sparking playfully. His voice was low, just for her, and she swallowed and stepped back farther.

“I didn’t pretend to fall over,” she shot back without thinking, unnecessarily flustered. This conversation was quickly veering out of her control.

He looked at her teasingly, as if he knew what effect he was having on her. “Right.”

“Just give me your phone.” She quickly typed her number in and gave it back to him. “There.”

“That wasn’t so hard, was it, Jude?”

Something about the way he said her name grated on her nerves. Instead of responding to him, she lifted her middle finger at him from behind her back as she climbed past him on the bleachers, and Cardan laughed.

When she reached Vivi’s spot on the bleachers, Vivi gave her a curious look, but she just mumbled, “Let’s go home.”

As Oak chattered to Vivi on the car ride home, Jude slumped back into her seat, her feet sore after a long day at school and a grueling game. Her mind wandered aimlessly, and Jude found her thoughts repeatedly flitting back to a certain boy, and it wasn’t the one who had asked her out.

A/N: I hope you guys like the chapter!! We love to see Jude and Cardan being ‘enemies’ and pissing each other off. This scene literally came to me at 4 am and I had to get up and write it.

I also mentioned the endangered sea turtles in this so if you’re interested in learning more, here’s a link to a post with more information about the struggles of green sea turtles and what you can do to help :)

Tagging: (Some tags didn’t work. I don’t know why, it might be your settings or just tumblr acting up, but I’ll tag you in the comments for now! If I forgot to tag  you our messed something up, just send me an ask and I’ll fix it as soon  as I can!)

@jurdan7 @cardan-greenbriar-tcp  @amoosewithflannelforfur @aneuwin @mercrutiodidntdieforthis  @hizqueen4life @mi-mavencalories @simonelovesff @b00kworm @nope-has-lied @andromeddea @aesthetics-11 @queen-of-glass @runnybabbit9  @afexiss @the-keen-queen @yesimtheslytherinwitch @fizziefaerie @abigneignenn @storiesandschemes  @aelin-queen-of-terrasen @words-of-the-wise @thedazzlingheights @magicalbookwyvern @kittkatandbooboo @queen-of-no1 @iminsanenotobsessed @dorkzrul @snusbandxknifewife  @aknymph @clouds-and-peonies @thefolkofthefic

[sunflowerhae]

Lifeboat

N.J (2k)

A/N• this is purely indulgent. It also has quite heavy themes, but at this point are any of us surprised. I want to make something clear, the reader doesn’t do what she does bc of what happens with her and Jaemin (I’m trying not to spoil). I mean, that’s just a tip of the iceberg type situation. That being said, if you are having similar thoughts as our dear reader, please call your countries suicide hotline, and/or talk to someone you trust in your life. ALSO, I am not trying to romanticize any of the topics I wrote about, I’m trying to show that even the people that seem to have it all can be just as lost and broken as the rest of us, also that the most important thing you could be to a person is someone who asks them if they’re okay. Sometimes, that’s all a person needs - Someone to listen.

READ!⚠️angst, suicide,character death, drugs, heavy self-hating words, depiction of depression/mental illness, not specified, but insinuates⚠️

{🎵SOTS☁️; Lifeboat, Elle McLemore}

The world seemed to close in on you as you stared at the boy who stood before you with a hardened gaze in his eyes. While you only stood a good 3 feet away from him, you could feel the anger and helplessness radiating off of him, transferring itself onto you in sadness and heartbreak.

“Why?” Was the only thing you could manage to get past your lips.

“Y/n, it’s not that I don’t like you, of course I do. We’ve been dating for 2 years, but I’ve just been... uncomfortable almost the whole time. It’s not your fault, it’s just, your life. I can’t handle being with one of the most popular girls in school. You seem to have it all figured out, and everyone loves you, and I feel pushed to the side sometimes.” You didn’t understand why Jaemin was mad, but the small space under the bleachers where you both stood was enough to suffocate you to the point where you didn’t care to ask.

He didn’t understand.

They never understood.

No one.

You wanted to fight to save your relationship, but the words choked into the back of your throat, just like they did when Soojin would bully people in front of you, and you wanted to scream at her and pull the other person into your arms and whisper that it will all be okay and apologize apologize apologize, but you stayed rigid on her flank, silently trying to survive until you could get to Jaemins arms, or to the bottom of a beer bottle at yet another house party you were constantly forced to attend with your other two friends.

You choose to swallow your spit, and ask him, “is this because of soojin? Did she say something to you?” You knew your “dear” friend had a certain distaste for your long term boyfriend, because - as she had worded it - his kind doesn’t belong next to someone that Soojin had deemed acceptable enough to befriend (you); “His kind” being not necessarily the most popular. Him and his other friends were amazing people, and you wished you would have befriended them on the first day of freshman year, instead of the blonde girl in your Art 1 class that always had a red scrunchie. When Jaemin introduced you to them, you could tell they were hesitate to let you into their life - what with your position within your schools hierarchy system. You honestly didn’t blame them. However, after a while they warmed up to you, and you felt like you finally fit in with people. You thought these people would become your life long friends; long after you’ve left high school and forgotten all about the life you unwillingly lead.

You suppose that is no longer the case.

“No, yes, god I don’t know, y/n. It’s just, everything! You have friends that are bitches, and I never know when you’re just going to leave me and spread some terrible rumor about me!” He was silently yelling now. It was after school, and the football team was on the field - the other side of where you stood - practicing. There were people running on the track, cheerleaders practicing next to the field, leftover students wondering the grounds. Everyone was living, moving on with their lives and turning along with the Earth - why did you feel frozen? Why did you feel like nothing was ever going to keep moving and be okay and the world was never going to be beautiful again?

“Is that what you expect me to do, Jaemin? After two years of knowing me, is that what you think of me?”

“God, y/n, maybe! I see who you align yourself with so I wouldn’t be surprised if you were a bitch just like them!” You understood he was just hurting, like you, but that didn’t make the words hurt any less. You took a couple steps back from his figure with slow nods, before turning around fully and booking your way to your car.

Jaemin watched your retreating figure with tears curling into his eyes. He left not long after you did, still thinking about you on the way home. He didn’t know this at the time, but that was the last time he ever saw you. His first love, his first heartache.

You felt guilty.

You always did. You always had this insistent chewing at your intestines; this constant voice in your head telling you that everyone was better than you, and that you didn’t deserve the praise you got for being a good person.

You tried to fight the words and the icky feelings off with trips to the volunteer center - usually with Jaemin. You went that night, hoping that this constant pain in your heart after hearing jaemins smooth, venom-filled words would choke back and leave your system, like the terrible feelings usually did when you helped people. However, no matter how many people smiled at you, and no matter how many lives you got to help, the feeling only grew more and more.

You are worthless, y/n.

You only do charity work for your own need.

No one likes you.

You’ll never be loved.

Not even Jaemin loves you.

These ill thoughts were a normal occurrence for you. Usually, Jaemin would lay you down, rub your stomach, and whisper in your ear how beautiful you were to him, inside and out.

You were a nuisance and a waste to him, y/n.

The feelings never left, and you could tell people knew something was wrong with you, so you chose to leave the center early. On your way out, a familiar face had asked you where Jaemin was. You pretended you didn’t hear them.

Your room was dark. Usually, if you couldn’t have Jaemin, you would go to your parents. However, they were away at a dinner event for your mother’s work. You would never go to Soojin, and while you loved Haeyong, she had a tendency to tell Soojin about what you two privately talked about; always trying to get brownie points with the blonde girl who seemed to secretly hate her. You figured there was someone you could go to, and it didn’t hurt to try.

Y/n [10:57pm] u up???? I kinda need someone to talk to rn hAha. Read

Y/n [10:59pm] hello? 👉👈 Read

Y/n [11:02pm] Haechan why r you leaving me on read bro?? Ik he’s your best friend, but we don’t have to talk about him, I just need someone to talk to pLS pls. Read

[MISSED CALL FROM Y/N] 11:02PM

Haechan [11:03pm] listen y/n we shouldn’t talk anymore, I’m sorry. You were a good friend, but Jaemin was and always will be first to me. And he’s right, we never know when you’re going to do a 180 on us and tell all of our secrets to everyone. We can’t - and never have been able to - trust you. I’m sorry, really. You’re a popular girl. You don’t need us, you’ll forget. When we became friends with you, we didn’t really want to, Jaemin kinda forced us to, I hope u understand. :/ we’ll forget about u, u forget about us. Deal? Read

Y/n [11:04pm] um ok. Sorry for bothering you all, have a good night Read

Y/n [11:03pm] when will u be home?Read

[MISSED CALL FROM Y/N] 11:04PM

Mom [11:06pm] not for a while, ask Jaemin to come over if you’re scared of being alone. Read

Y/n [11:06pm] mom i hate to be annoying but can u and dad come home rn??? I need u Read

[MISSED CALL FROM Y/N] 11:06PM

Mom [11:08pm] are you dying? Has someone broken in? Are you unsafe?Read

Y/n [11:08pm] um,,,,no Read

Mom [11:10pm] well then no y/n. You know how much this award means to me, I’ve been constantly working lately and finally might get recognized for it. If I leave now, I might not get it. Can whatever you need wait? Read

Y/n [11:11pm] Um yeah. I love u Read

Mom [11:12pm] u too💖 Read

Why were you never first?

Why was there no one who asked you if you were okay?

If there was, what would you say?

See y/n? No one likes you.

You’re a bother to them.

Maybe you should fix that.

Maybe if you made their lives easier, they would love you.

You didn’t deserve their love, but maybe?

Maybe the pills could love you.

They were always there for you.

Maybe, they could help others love you too.

Love love love love.

Maybe.

Maybe.

They say your parents found you in bed.

They thought you were sleeping. I mean, all your lights were off, it was late.

But in the morning, when your mother came to wake you up and saw that your eyes were wide open, well....

They found the note on your desk across the room.

It was dated a year before.

You had written it a year before.

Everyone admitted that it was such a beautiful note. Heartbreaking? Yes. gut-wrenching? Of course. But beautiful, absolutely beautiful.

They gathered everyone into the gym the next day in intervals. Freshman, who didn’t understand what was really happening, but had heard your name and definitely knew who you were, and could put two and two together.

Next, the sophomores. Like the freshman, they only had heard of you. Some had met you, some cried. You were kind, they knew.

After them, the juniors. Chenle and Jisung were sitting in the corner. Jisung was sobbing into Chenle’s lap, while silent tears fell down the olders’ face. You had always been willing to play video games with them, and were such a kind hearted person. They remember last night, when they were all sitting together and haechan had read your texts you sent out loud, and all of them were so busy feeling for Jaemin, that they blindly informed Haechan on what he should say. On how to break your heart. Chenle wished Haechan had called her.

Finally, the seniors. Soojin and Haeyong sat in the back, as always. They were both upset because you had not been answering their texts.

Renjun, Haechan, Jeno, and Jaemin were sitting on the other side. They had not been told what the assembly was about, but when the teacher got the call about it, halfway through math, she sat at her desk for a couple of seconds with her head in her hands. They knew whatever the assembly was about was not good.

Haechan was the first to react out of the four.

He whispered your name silently with wide eyes rounded on his face. His mind went to the first time you met him. You played him in a round of Overwatch to get him to warm up to you, and easily beat him. Besides Jaemin, he was probably the one you were closest to.

Jeno just kept looking at his lap with evident tears denting dark spots onto his jeans. Renjun, who was sitting next to Jaemin, couldn’t take his eyes off the boy to his right, terrified that he would faint.

Jaemin felt sick. He knew he looked pale, and his head felt a bit dizzy. He tasted metallic in his mouth, and finally registered that he was biting the inside of his cheek so hard, he was drawing blood. He wanted to leave, but he was too far up on the risers to get down.

Soojin cried. It was uncharacteristic of her, but at this point she didn’t care. How had she not seen it? Was she that self centered that she had really not seen it on you? Her best friend?

Haeyong wished you had called her, wished you had told her. But why would you? She knew she didn’t deserve to hear your heartache, but she still wished.

They read out your note. Your beautiful, heartbreaking, gut-wrenching note. They read it. And the student body listened.

I float in a boat

In a raging black ocean

Low in the water

And no where to go

The tiniest lifeboat

With people I know

Cold,

Clammy and crowded

The people smell desperate

We’ll sink any minute

So someone must go

The tiniest lifeboat

With people I know

Everyone’s pushing

Everyone’s fighting

Storms are approaching, there’s no where to hide

If I say the wrong thing

Or I wear the wrong outfit

They’ll throw me right over the side

I’m hugging my knees

And the captain is pointing

Well who made her captain?

Still, the weakest must go

The tiniest lifeboat

Full of people I know

The tiniest lifeboat

Full of people I know

Lemme know if you’d like a part two? Idk. Like I said this is purely indulgent so it’s not that good sorry :///