#so very excited to be out through the ringer it’s my favorite kind of book

[bookwyrminspiration]

“she had gathered up the matter of Ortus Nigenad’s soul and not been able to choke him all the way down” “there had been another girl who grew up alongside Harrow—but she had died before Harrow was born”

[that--unusual-person]

Hello. This is for a friend. They wanted to know how Santana would treat his pregnant mate and what happens when the baby is born.

My little baby boy is a good father if not a perfect father (sorry, Kars, im playing favorites tonight)

After Santana admitted to starting a family of his own, curious to other human families and how he was raised, he wanted to raise a child of his own and what better way to do it than with you.  This came as a shock to you considering how uninterested Santana had been around most traditions but the thought of starting a family with you gave you joy and excitement.  It was a rough beginning but there was plenty of time to make up for it.  Beforehand, he came to Kars and Esidisi seeking some ‘parenting wisdom’, and he got more than enough knowledge on how to care for you and the child.  Pillar Men style, that is.  Least to say you didn’t like his plan after he told you about how he was going to start training the child to be a warrior at a very young age just as Kars and Esidisi did with Wamuu and him.  So he had to find out the ‘hard’ way, the human way, and how to do it.  And now, he’s an absolute professional.

Your many months being pregnant with him have gone tremendously smooth.  He’s kept an eye on you and cared for you very well, but your last couple months have put you through the ringer.  Santana wants you to be happy and healthy.  Learning how uncomfortable a woman can be during pregnancy, so this final stretch puts him in ‘making a nest so comfortable you won’t want to leave’ mode.  Bringing in all different types of blankets and furs you find comfortable and pillows upon pillows enough to make a fort or more.  You seem more and more hungry each day, him knowing he must take charge of feeding you while you rest comfortably.  He gathers your favorite foods and well prepped meals, they all are rich in flavor and perfect sustenance for you and your baby.  He studied a cookbook and experimented in the kitchen, now look at him… he puts Gordon Ramesy to shame.  And to top it off he brings your favorite entertainment, whether it be books, your laptop(he might rip your pc and tv out of the wall), your phone, puzzles, games and all kinds of things to make you feel more at home in one small spot.  In pain?  No problem, Santana is on it.  He has a list you helped him memorize what medicine you need to ease your troubles.  He brings them straight to you with a glass of water and cuddles to cure you of any stress.

You’ve been out for a few days to the hospital leaving Santana alone.  He insisted he’d wait until you return, the poor boy is secretly scared out of his mind but does his best not to show it and is failing miserably.  ‘Will you be alright?  Will the child be safe?  Can you trust those other humans?  What if something goes wrong?  What if you don’t make it?  What if…’ the thoughts in his head race one after another.  Kars offered to accompany you to the hospital, seeing as Santana wasn’t ready for being around other humans.  He ordered Santana to stay back at home and promised to protect you at all cost.  He trusts Kars with protecting his mate, but he feels so itchy about being without you.  Hours go by as he is still pacing around in the room where you said your goodbyes.  Finally the door opened and Kars was the first thing Santana saw.  He comes to a halt from his pacing staring at Kars waiting for him to say something.  “She’s waiting for you.  You may go now,” he says as he leaves.  Santana immediately leaves the room making his way back to your nest, he knows you’ll be back there, but will you be alone?  As you lay on the nest of blankets, pillows and furs you see Santana enter and quickly and quietly hush him.  His relief is turned to confusion before seeing your new born child in your arms making him freeze.  You don’t see it but he is swelling with emotions, he just stares for a moment before approaching where you are seated on your nest.  He doesn’t say anything but his eyes scream happiness and shock.  Slowly he reaches for the baby's hand holding it gently his, the size difference between his palm and the childs are almost hysterical.  You giggle as he jumps at the baby gripping his finger.  He still hasn’t said anything, but it looks like he’s examining the baby before finally looking up at you.  Your smile, the baby, everything is going at him like a train, his chest feels like it’s about to explode with happiness seeing how happy you are with your child and him.  Carefully he leans forward into you, pressing his forehead on yours, a smile forming on his face.  “Beautiful.  You have done… so well, my mate,” he speaks softly as you two enjoy the silence with your newborn.

“They grow up so fast… at least for Pillar Men standards.” - Von

[votsalot]

tagged by @queentoad​ <3

🎃 Pumpkin: Favourite season?

I like them all for their respective things! I like summer the most because I am literally allergic to cold weather. But in the spring I like watching everything melt and turn green, in the summer I like to go outside (lmao), in the fall I like all the seasonal flavors and all the trees that change, and in the winter I like the energy surrounding December.

👻 Ghost: Do you get scared easily?

I don’t like jump scares but I have a high stamina for other kinds of things. In terms of real physical things that can scare me, spiders. In the adult-fear sense - losing control of things. This past year has been. A ringer.

🎃 Candy Corn: What’s your favourite kind of candy? 

Raspberry and chocolate together, sour things generally! I got some sour gummi bears in a Halloween pack and they’re my favorite right now.

👻 Vampire: What is your favourite supernatural creature? 

Ghosts. I like the stories associated with them.

🎃 Witch: If you could have any superpower, what would it be? 

I would like to be able to shapeshift.

👻 Trick or treat: What was your favourite Halloween costume? 

My favorite Halloween costume was when my parents dressed me up like baby Simba. It had a little bonnet shaped like Simba’s face, and a tail, and it was the best thing I’d ever experienced in my four years of life.

🎃 Black cat: Are you superstitious? 

It depends on what it is.

👻 Ouija Board: If you could change your name, what would you change it to? 

If I were to change my name, I’d probably go by my middle name. But personally I like all the parts of my full name. They all have the same number of letters and share the same third letter, so if I changed my name it’d have to fit lmao.

🎃 Graveyard: Do you know any good scary stories?

I’m reading a really good book with my partner called Her Body and Other Parties ( @queentoad​ there’s a retelling of the green ribbon story in there you might be interested in) and it’s good so far. We haven’t read it in a while because the last one we read was about a pandemic that destroyed the world and it felt a little too real hhhhhhhhh.

But I used to live in a mildly haunted house, according to my mom. Nothing wild happened but she swears there were ghosts there. I was too young to remember.

👻 Skeleton: Have you ever broken a bone? 

I’ve broken my right wrist twice - once from falling down the stairs, and another time from jumping from the top of a slide. I thought it would be a good tag strategy. In high school I sprained my ankle so badly I passed out because I..........jumped off the top of stair landing because I......thought it would be a good cat-catching strategy. We call that a through line. 

🎃 Werewolf: What is your favourite urban legend?

My favorite urban legend is the one we made up as a class in third grade. There were trails in the woods behind our elementary school and we used to be able to go on them during recess (used to being the operative word). These woods were close to residential houses but to 8-year-olds, it was the wilderness. Long story short, someone heard a chainsaw revving and then boom! We were all convinced there was a killer stalking everyone who used the trail. Did this stop us using the trail. This all came to head when my teacher told one of the boys in my class to bring a scary mask to school and hide on the trail, and then he convinced some of the students from our class to go explore it. I don’t know what happened because I had to sit at the punishment wall for getting a bad grade on a spelling test or something, but I watched all of them come running out the woods with the other kid chasing them. We weren’t allowed back on the trails after that, thanks for nothing Mr. K.

👻 Horror flick: Do you like scary movies? 

Yes! I have a very special place in my heart for horror-comedy movies especially.

🎃 Haunted house: Would you prefer to live in the city or the country? 

City over country all the time.

👻 Zombie: Do you think that you could survive a zombie apocalypse?

Nope! That one post about wrapping yourself up in all the cashmere you own and dying in bed during the zombie apocalypse is what I envision for myself, but without the cashmere because I don’t own any.

🎃 Cauldron: What kind of potion would you make if you had the opportunity? 

Potion of no more periods. One-and-done. Boom. No health coverage necessary.

👻 Full moon: Do you prefer nighttime or daytime? 

Early morning when the sun is up, and the evening when the sun is setting.

🎃 Corn maze:  What is your favourite autumn activity? 

My favorite autumn activity is all the stuff with apples and pumpkins. And going to orchards, watching scary movies.

👻 Broomstick: What exciting places have you travelled to? 

I loved going to Edinburgh, I loved the weather and the architecture. We also got to go to Loch Ness, which was incredible. Dresden was also beautiful, and bright. Berlin was very modish and had excellent kebab. I’m going to remember Munich until I die. I got to visit Tuscania in Viterbo, Lazio Italy because we had a friend who was studying abroad there at the same time we were travelling - they filmed parts of the 1968 adaptation of Romeo and Juliet there. Her boyfriend gave us a midnight ghost tour 👀 She was also taking a cooking class and her professor invited us to dinner at her restaurant/resort...honestly it was like living in someone else’s life. We went to France, spent a week in Barcelona. We wound up in Amsterdam on King’s Day completely by coincidence and it was the coolest experience. If I was going to pick two places to go back to, it’d be Edinburgh and Amsterdam. I regret not going to see Highclere Castle when I had the chance, because I was literally living 20 minutes away from it for four months. I can’t believe I told myself I didn’t really care about it that much. I also regret not making time to go to Ireland.

My sister also got first-class trip to Disney World in high school. It was probably a $15,000-$20,000 dollar experience and we would NEVER be able to do that unless she’d wished for it.

tagging @kiahexploration and anyone else who is interested <3

[buriedinbleach]

You are amazing! Please fill my pervy mind with images of Kensei spending alone time with himself. I need to know all the details! Thank you for doing god's work 😁

Um… I love this. So delicious! I’m so glad there’s so many people that share my overwhelming thirst for that babe. Bless. This got a bit long too. Forgive me, I love him and got carried away. Its part HC, with a dash of smutty drabble at the end because I lack impulse control and we all know what kinda detailed smut you expect from me by now.

Let’s go over a day in the life of Kensei while you’re away, shall we? We shall. Just know, your absence affects a lot of shinigami - not just Kensei.

*You just had to go off on a mission and leave him at home by himself, didn’t you? Well, its your job, of course you did. Kensei has a high sense of duty and honor, so he understands. But that sure as shit doesn’t mean he has to like it, ok? How the hell is the poor man supposed to sleep now? He’s gotten used to having you snuggled up around his body at night - he likes it - and now he’s on his own until you get back. What the hell is he supposed to do by himself?!

*As previously established, Kensei has a high sex drive. I’ll say it again: High. So it wouldn’t take long for the nagging itch to start needling his body, making him even more edgy and irritable than normal. But Kensei also prides himself on his resistance and ability to delay gratification (he’s a pro), so he’s not going to give in easily. He’s a Captain. He has shit to do, damnit.

*Kensei is an early riser, even more so when he’s been lying awake half the night because his cuddle buddy is gone. (Kensei: “Shinji, you’re a dead man if you ever mention you heard that. Dead.”) So he’ll make himself a quick morning protein shake and head down to his home gym for a lengthy workout - blasting Pantera, scowling adorably while he puts those muscles through the ringer.

*After some good exercise, he’ll squeeze in a quick cold shower. The water was a normal temperature for all of two seconds, but as he faced the wall, his thoughts inevitably trailed back to the shower you took together yesterday morning before you left. He picked you up and held you against the smooth tiles, railing you nice and slow while you gripped his shoulders. He can still see the faint red, crescent shaped marks from your nails. Still feel you clenching around him, hear you crying out... ‘Shit. No time, I’m gonna be late.’

*Work is rough. For everyone. You were kind enough (to the rest of the Ninth) to send Shuhei a quick message when you received your mission orders though. He’s been around long enough to read the early warning signs of Kensei’s moods and knows that any significant absence from you makes for one seriously grumpy Captain Muguruma. (Note: you’ve been gone roughly 24 hours at this point. And that counts as significant absence in Kensei’s book.)

-Mashiro is absolutely banned from approaching within 50 feet of Kensei. Shuhei takes it upon himself to give her the day off. She doesn’t argue and for once, Kensei doesn’t ask where she went. Its a winning combination.

-The rest of the division isn’t so lucky. The effects of the strenuous workout Kensei put himself through that morning have mostly worn off. The sound of leather cracking as he clenches and unclenches his fists can only mean one thing: Extra Training. All Day. For Everyone. No Excuses, pansies.

-By the time Kensei is finished with them, a third of his division is visiting the Fourth for medical treatment. Kenpachi would be proud. Their injuries range from minor scrapes and bruises, to a few serious gashes and broken bones. More than half the shinigami receiving treatment are merely faking it in order to escape any more punishment from Kensei.

*Eventually, he’ll have to return home though. Still very much alone. He’ll make himself dinner, read over the mission reports he brought home to pass the time, then eventually head off to bed when he’s run out of other things to do. But in your shared bedroom, he can’t stop himself from thinking about you anymore.

*Kensei’s first hint of trouble comes as soon as he drops down into bed. Your scent surrounds him, as if its woven into the threads of the fabric. He’ll tilt his head to your side of the bed, discreetly smelling your pillow. He might be alone, but he’s not about to admit how much he’s missing you - even if its only to himself. Kensei takes a long, deep breath and holds it, picturing you before exhaling. Your face, your smile, your laugh, even the satisfied smirk you’d be giving him if you knew what he was doing and how much he’s missed you… he’s already half-hard. Fuck.

*He’ll grit his teeth, mentally admitting defeat, and reach for his phone - quickly preparing to type out a message, or dial your number just to hear your voice, but he stops himself. Once more, he can hear your teasing voice delighted with his current ‘predicament’. It sounds so clear, Kensei could swear you were right there with him:

“Are you that excited just thinking about me? You’re already hard, babe.” He can picture your confident smile, feel the heat from your body as you prowl up the bed over him. Imaginary or not, the warmth of your lips - your tongue - as you kiss and lick up his neck feels all too real. His imagination seems to become more vivid the longer he tries to hold out.

He shifts his hips restlessly, his throbbing erection now straining his shorts uncomfortably. Kensei groans, closing his eyes, and turns his face away - still feeling your tongue glide up his neck before your heated breath hits his ear. He inhales deeply through his nose, opening his eyes, but he immediately catches a glimpse of a sheer lace nightie you had left hanging on the back of the door.

“Mmm, that’s your favorite, isn’t it Kensei? Its the only one you haven’t ripped off me yet.”

Kensei pictures you moving to straddle his hips, touching his cheek to pull his dark gaze back to you. His dick throbs, while his mind quickly races over images of you wearing the nightie. Your nipples turn to hard pebbles as he sucks and teases them through the fabric. You grind your hips over his shaft, gripping his hair and holding his mouth against your breast.

‘Fuck it. This isn’t going away.’

Kensei quickly shoves his boxer briefs down his hips, tossing them from the bed. He strokes his hand steadily over his hard shaft, mimicking the precise pressure and the maddeningly slow, delicate roll of your hips as you tease him. He cinches his eyes tightly shut, his tongue moves languidly in his mouth as he pictures the point of it flicking over your lace covered nipple again. Your sharp hiss is followed by a combination of breathy sighs and moans that make him grin while his cock twitches, begging to be deep inside you instead of wrapped in his own hand.

He watches you with hungry, heavy-lidded eyes as you peel the lingerie off your body, giving him a seductive smile - never once stopping the torturous grind of your hips. A low groan rolls through his chest feeling you grip his shaft, imagining you biting your lower lip, before finally rising up to your knees and sinking down onto him - impaling your body with his.

Kensei’s hand tightens and slides down his girth in his best attempt at matching the vice grip of your inner walls around his cock while your muscles stretch to accommodate him. He grinds his head back against the pillow, arching his hips up at the mere memory of thrusting into your delicious heat. His breaths come faster - heavier - and he quickens the pace of his strokes. Kensei licks his lips, his fantasy becoming clearer the closer he comes to his release.

He can almost feel your fingers sink into the hard planes of his chest as you ride him. His ears hear nothing in the empty room but the ghost of your panting moans mixed with his own ragged breaths. The warmth pooling in his gut begins to spread. Kensei grits his teeth, his jaw strains, holding out until he hears your blissful cries and feels your walls pulsate around his cock, gripping and pulling him - over and over.

‘Fuck!’ Kensei growls sharply as his own hand mimics the rhythm of your body until he finally gives in to his own release, spilling over his hand with a final, deep groan.

Kensei lies in bed, taking a few deep breaths to reorient himself before doing a quick bit of clean up and sinking back down onto the soft futon. With one arm propped behind his head, his other drapes over the firm muscles of his abdomen, and he stares up at the ceiling.

‘Two more days. Shit.’

[citizenscreen]

When you find out Turner Classic Movies (TCM) is spotlighting la grand dame of movies as their Star of the Month in November, you know you have a lot to be thankful for. Few actors can help you take your mind off your troubles more effortlessly than Bette Davis and few could be as bitchy doing it. Bette Davis was a gem. I invite you let me know what your favorite Bette Davis movies are as you watch them on TCM. I’m @CitizenScreen on Twitter, Citizen Screen on Facebook, or simply leave a comment down below.

The TCM Bette Davis month-long festival begins on Tuesday, November 5 with films starring Davis from the 1930s. Each week features a different time period of her career through the 1960s. I’m particularly excited about the Davis films I’ve yet to see like William Dieterle’s Fog Over Frisco (1934) and Bretaigne Windust’s June Bride (1948), but the month is replete with Davis standards everyone must see. To me this is a perfect opportunity to turn people into classics fans. Bette Davis has the kind of presence that makes it impossible to ever forget her.

“That’s me: an old kazoo with some sparklers”

I should mention that William Wyler’s The Letter, one of my favorite Bette Davis films will not air as part of the November festival. It will be featured on TCM in December instead. During this festival, however, you will be treated to such enduring classics as Jezebel, Dark Victory, All About Eve and cult favorites like What Ever Happened to Baby Jane? in addition to many less known features plus a few surprises. As you plan for family gatherings, include a Bette Davis movie or two or three. They’ll bring you closer together.

in ALL ABOUT EVE

in JEZEBEL

in MARKED WOMAN

in DARK VICTORY

in DEAD RINGER

in OF HUMAN BONDAGE

  There are a few other interesting festivals on TCM in November: Wednesdays will feature movies celebrating the 100th anniversary of the American Society of Cinematographers, Dennis Miller and Friends offers an eclectic array of films from various eras, and daily spotlights include the films of the great John Ford, to name a few happenings. It will be a busy month for movie fans. Have fun.

Quotable Davis:

Bette Davis remains one of the most quotable Hollywood figures in history. At least by my estimation and with good reason as you’ll see. I can’t resist her and offer some of my favorite Davis quotes about life, the film industry, Hollywood players, acting and Bette Davis. This should hold you over from Tuesday to Tuesday during her Star of the Month tribute.

I’d marry again if I found a man who had fifteen million dollars, would sign over half to me, and guarantee that he’d be dead within a year.

Old age is no place for sissies.

Everybody has a heart. Except some people.

I was a person who couldn’t make divorce work. For me, there’s nothing lonelier than a turned-down toilet seat

I’m the nicest goddamn dame that ever lived.

With the newspaper strike on, I wouldn’t consider dying.

I am just too much.

From the moment I was six I felt sexy. And let me tell you it was hell, sheer hell, waiting to do something about it.

[referring to her parents’ divorce when she was 7] Of course I replaced my father. I became my own father and everyone else’s.

[on Greta Garbo] Oh, Garbo was divine. Soooo beautiful. I worshipped her. When I became a star, I used to have my chauffeur follow her in my car. I always wanted to meet her.

Acting should be bigger than life. Scripts should be bigger than life. It should all be bigger than life.

I never did pal around with actresses. Their talk usually bored me to tears.

There was more good acting at Hollywood parties than ever appeared on the screen.

Hollywood always wanted me to be pretty, but I fought for realism.

In this business, until you’re known as a monster you’re not a star.

Today everyone is a star – they’re all billed as ‘starring’ or ‘also starring’. In my day, we earned that recognition.

[about Katharine Hepburn‘s tie for the 1968 Oscar with Barbra Streisand] I wanted to be the first to win three Oscars, but Miss Hepburn has done it. Actually it hasn’t been done. Miss Hepburn only won half an Oscar. If they’d given me half an Oscar I would have thrown it back in their faces. You see, I’m an Aries. I never lose.

My favorite person to work with was Claude Rains.

[on John Wayne] I certainly would have given anything to have worked with John Wayne. He’s the most attractive man who ever walked the earth, I think.

[on Errol Flynn] He was just beautiful . . . Errol. He himself openly said, “I don’t know really anything about acting,” and I admire his honesty because he’s absolutely right.

Davis’ most memorable quotes pertained to Joan Crawford with whom she shared a legendary rivalry.

[on working with Joan Crawford in What Ever Happened to Baby Jane? (1962)] We were polite to each other – all the social amenities, ‘Good morning, Joan’ and ‘Good Morning, Bette’ crap – and thank God we weren’t playing roles where we had to like each other. But people forget that our big scenes were alone – just the camera was on me or her. No actresses on earth are as different as we are, all the way down the line. Yet what we do works. It’s so strange, this acting business. It comes from inside. She was always so damn proper. She sent thank you notes for thank you notes. I screamed when I found out she signed autographs: ‘Bless you, Joan Crawford.’

[After hearing that Joan Crawford cried copiously over “Dark Victory”] Joan always cries a lot. Her tear ducts must be very close to her bladder.

[Of her longtime rival] We must hand it to her. Where she came from and all that–she accomplished *much*. She became a movie star, and I became the great actress. There is of course a need for both in this business, but you have to know *when* to put a stop to the nonsense that goes with the job. Stars are people *too*. They have to eat, sleep, and go to the bathroom too, without applause or a standing ovation. But I don’t *think* Joan Crawford ever sleeps. She never *quits* being Joan Crawford. I find that tedious and quite insane.

I was not Miss Crawford’s biggest fan, but, wisecracks to the contrary, I did and still do respect her talent. What she did not deserve was that detestable book written by her daughter. I’ve forgotten her name. Horrible. I looked at that book, but I did not need to read it. I wouldn’t read trash like that, and I think it was a terrible, terrible thing for a daughter to do. An abomination! To do something like that to someone who saved you from the orphanage, foster homes, who knows what. If she didn’t like the person who chose to be her mother, she was grown up and could choose her own life. I felt very sorry for Joan Crawford, but I knew she wouldn’t appreciate my pity, because that’s the last thing she would have wanted, anyone being sorry for her, especially me.

[when told by director Robert Aldrich that the studios wanted Joan Crawford as her co-star for Hush…Hush, Sweet Charlotte (1964)] I wouldn’t piss on Joan Crawford if she were on fire.

[on Joan] She has slept with every male star at MGM except Lassie.

Why am I so good at playing bitches? I think it’s because I’m not a bitch. Maybe that’s why [Joan Crawford] always plays ladies.

[on the death Joan] You should never say bad things about the dead, you should only say good . . . Joan Crawford is dead. Good.

[Joan Crawford] and I have never been warm friends. We are not simpatico. I admire her, and yet I feel uncomfortable with her. To me, she is the personification of the Movie Star. I have always felt her greatest performance is Crawford being Crawford.

The best time I ever had with Joan Crawford was when I pushed her down the stairs in Whatever Happened to Baby Jane?

“I have been uncompromising, peppery, intractable, monomaniacal, tactless, volatile, and oftentimes disagreeable. I suppose I am larger than life.”

  Bette Davis Spotlighted on TCM in November When you find out Turner Classic Movies (TCM) is spotlighting la grand dame of movies as their Star of the Month in November, you know you have a lot to be thankful for.

[postguiltypleasures]

JANE THE VIRGIN Finale Articles Links Round Up

Jane the Virgin, a show I never missed and affected my emotions on surprising ways wrapped up last week. It did well by plots that I feel like I’ve only ever seen done badly. The finale was pretty perfect in that it highlight what was special about the show and giving us the viewers a loving goodbye. I don’t know where the show will ultimately fit in with the direction in which television is moving, it kind of feels like an end of something and the beginning of something. Going through these fair wells might be a first step.

I’m actually starting with a couple of articles that really weren’t about the show’s finale. The first is technically a review of Emily Nussbaum’s I Like to Watch, as she has been a great champion of the show, as well as generally insisting that the what is considered “serious” vs “frivolous” be reconsidered. This response to Nussbaum’s book starts in particular about her essay “Jane the Virgin isn’t a Guilty Pleasure”. Nussbaum’s essay does a great job at praising what the show does well as connecting it to earlier television shows. (Interestingly she doesn’t associate Jane with camp the way she did with Ugly Betty, nor does she list that as one of Jane’s predecessors despite the fact that both are US primetime networks adapting Latin American telenovelas. I’ll get more into why I think that is interesting and probably for the best later.) The article about her book does more to talk about how it’s been frequently overlooked for shows that seem created for men. In a lot of her book tour Nussbaum has spoken about how the way Buffy the Vampire Slayer and The Sopranos were discussed around the time that they debuted drove her into tv criticism. If I were to pick something to be The Sopranos to Jane’s Buffy I’d probably go with Breaking Bad, as it had a notoriously difficult time getting its fans to care about/not hate Walt’s home life. Walt’s home life was about the slow consequences of his drug dealing and gangster activity. There was always a fair amount of gangster activity on Jane, but from watching Breaking Bad could leave you with the impression that there’s no way to make caring for an infant as exciting as the chaos of organized crime. Jane proved that isn’t true.

Also before the finale, The Ringer published this article that is sort of half praise/ half interview with the creator. It gets into the ways it played with the crime drama story types but never really treated it like that’s what it was about. It also gets into the writer’s room, and I was happy to learn that some people there have worked on telenovela’s in the past. It also has some quote’s from Jaime Camil who plays Jane’s father Rogelio de la Vega, which I thought were an interesting contrast to an interview he gave earlier in the show’s run. The Ringer article misleadingly identifies Camil as having starred in the “Spanish language version of Ugly Betty.” There were three Spanish language versions of Ugly Betty, or rather there were three Spanish language versions of the Colombian telenovela Yo Soy Betty La Fea which was the source material for Ugly Betty. Camil starred it the Mexican one, La Fea Más Bella, which debuted around the same time as Ugly Betty. (Fun fact, between LFMB and the later Por Ella Soy Eva, Camil has twice starred in Mexican remakes of Colombian telenovela’s in roles originated by Jorge Enrique Abello) I was at one point obsessed with the whole constant remaking of YSBLF phenomena and Ugly Betty in particular. It was taking on one of the most popular IPs of all time and had to do it in a very different format than the original. (Producing one episode a week for an indefinite number of years is very different than five episodes a week for approximately a year. For starters, there’s going to be a much smaller ensemble.) I never watched the original Venezuelan telenovela Juana la Virgen. It wasn’t remade internationally with anything like the regularity as Betty, and ultimately that may have been in the American show’s favor. Part of me wants to say that Jane learned from some things Betty tried but didn’t necessarily execute so well. And another part of me thinks that not having the burden of massive international popularity allowed them to jettison some of the things that made it a harder to adapt for a different audience. In the original YSBLF, Betty’s family life and work life have this great tension where some of her more questionable decisions (specifically, choosing to help her boss commit fraud to the board of the company) are partially based in some disillusioning parts of her home life (namely, her father loosing his job due to the boss selling the company and never paying out his pension). Ugly Betty never played those two aspects of Betty’s life against her like that. In some ways it was much better to the character. (American Betty had professional ambition in a way that the original didn’t.) But in this not knowing how to connect her family and professional lives, it often felt like it was struggling to make the family life stories matter. Jane the Virgin never had this problem. Partially because it was much more interested in emotional reactions than plot twists, but also, because it didn’t need to follow an original’s example of making the work place drama the engine of the show. Between the different relationships they had with their source materials and how they mined the work/life balances of their character’s they were different shows, from different times. Too much comparison is just counterproductive.

Kathryn VanArendonk wrote beautifully about how the fantastical elements of the story made the more mundane plots like finding a good school for Mateo, and balancing child care and a burgeoning writing career, really work. VanArendonk doesn’t focus on how badly many other shows do on making the housekeeping side of life interesting. The fact that as a tv watcher you’ve been through so many examples of shows that feel like the drag or are just aimless when it comes to the personal life side of the work life divide does contribute towards the sort of miraculous feeling Jane sometimes created, but it’s probably for the best not to focus on the negative examples.

I also want to highlight this great personal essay about how the show dealt with both being an adult and having anxiety around sex, mostly because of cultural baggage. The show didn’t so much reject the things that we associate with the baggage (ie no one abandoned the Church. (Also not discussed was the fact that all three of the Villanueva women had anxiety about sex at some point in their stories, but as Xiomara’s was more about the aftermath of cancer and chemotherapy than culture created anxiety, so it doesn’t fit with Mariya Karimjee’s larger theme. Just bringing it up to say, I liked how Xiomara’s post-cancer story worked out.)

A final one from Vulture about the reveal that the narrator is the adult version of Jane’s son Mateo. I’m highlighting it because the Mateo has ADHD plot was one of the most moving stories the show did during the final season. ADHD is so misunderstood and there were so many ways that this could have gotten a too pat, wrong message of an ending. I’m glad voice over actor Anthony Mendez talks about how even as an adult it’s something with which he struggles.

I cheered for Petra for most of the series. However, due to things in my real life, I currently have a pretty low tolerance for stories about bad bosses. Petra’s worst quality was she was a terrible boss, mercurial and abusive. Inkoo Kang’s tribute to the character is good, and gets at why I’ve been interested in her, and her relationship with Jane, for so long. Despite finding Petra less likable in the final seasons than in earlier ones when she was more villainous, one of my favorite moments of hers did come this season. At one point she says that her “worst nightmare” is turning into her mother.  It could have been just a throwaway one, but then the narrator tells us it’s true and shows us what it looks like, and it manages to be hilarious, heartbreaking a you get why this would be Petra’s worst nightmare.

(The Toast once dedicated a “Femslash Friday” to the Jane and Petra dynamic. Here’s the link if interested.)

After the finale aired Slate also published an article about how the Michael is not dead plot didn’t work and was a disservice to the way love works. I mostly agree. I never really cared with whom Jane ended up.  The show was always more about figuring out haw to build and maintain relationships than proving who was more right for each other. And I did kind of like the “each in their own time” resolution to the love triangle. (I felt similarly to the one in Lost Girl.) I get why the show did it. I do agree it was why the final season dragged in some parts. I do think Michael coming back from the dead reinvigorated the Sin Rostro story just in time to climax on the penultimate episode. Whether or not that was worth it is up to you.

I do want to take this moment to point out that while watching Jane walk down the aisle in the final episode, I realized that there never really wasn’t a moment in the entire where I felt doubt that Jane was loved, or felt unlovable. The closest it ever got to that’s in its depictions of how growing up without a father affected her. But, as connecting with her biological father Rogelio and developing a very deep bond was such an important part of the show, that anxiety was never really felt for Jane. (Petra, on the other hand…) This makes her kind of an outlier of most of the series I watch, whether the was the point of the series (You’re the Worst, Crazy Ex Girlfriend) or kind of a side affect of the surreal and chaotic universe in which it’s set (Broad City, Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt). I’m not sure what to make of this. Is it part of why it would be more likely to be misidentified as a guilty pleasure? Is it a sign about changes in what makes a heroine “relatable”?

I’ve repeatedly said here that I’m thinking about tapering the amount of tv I watch until it’s none. In Margaret Lyons’s review, she talks about how Jane was in some ways the show that replaced Mad Men in her heart, which reminded me that when Jane started I wasn’t sure I wanted to start any new tv shows. Also both show’s care about episode structure in a way that feels undervalued these days.  I do kind of have to agree with Lyons that some of the final season felt like treading water. (Something that seemed to affect the more character than plot driven shows I’ve watched that have ended this year. This runs counter to most of my theory of what’s going on with tv these days.)

“Have you ever loved something so deeply it was almost impossible to talk about?” Jade Budowski wrote over at The Decider. And yes, for a while now, the things I like the most are the things I have the hardest time trying o talk about. It’s satisfying enough that you kind of want to just point and say “go, experience it for yourself.” Even though that runs the risk of letting it be taken as froth.

Over at Vox, Constance Grady wrote about how the finale worked, despite the fact that most of the conflict was resolved on the previous episode. It’s a loving tribute to how the show knew how to work and give us the happiest of endings without being too saccharine.

Finally, I want to day thanks for making Jane and Rafael’s wedding song Ximena Sariñana’s “Todo En Mi Vida”. Sure, I’ve been following Sariñana since her debut, Mediocre, so this is likely to appeal to me personally, but it’s also a beautiful song about learning to love the unexpected and build a new life around it.

[nerdyhuntress]

Of Blood and Betrayal (Part 3/5)

Thanks again for all your reviews and kind words! You have no idea how happy they make me :) You're the ones who give me the inspiration to keep writing and I cannot do it without you all. I truly appreciate it.

Special thanks again to @cssns and @kmomof4 

Just a warning that this fic IS rated M. It does get kinky a bit here, so you have been warned. Without further ado, here's another chapter.

It took a couple days for Killian to reply back. She would never admit it to anyone, but she grew worried for him every passing day. A part of her feared that, as a wanted criminal (for crimes he hadn’t committed), he had a target on his back. Thoughts raced in her head about what could have happened to him, each idea as unlikely as the next. So when he called back and offered to cook dinner for the two of them the next night, Emma let out a sigh of relief.

She counted down the hours until it was time to head to his apartment (of course, Emma would never admit that either). Checking the address he had given, she took a taxi to his apartment building, excited by the prospect of having dinner with him. A part of her also hoped that she could stay the night. Granted, she considered it a slight possibility, especially after what had happened last night.

The taxi dropped her off right in front of the apartment building. A fancy structure with dozens of floors, Emma Swan could never imagine having enough money to live there. Growing up in the foster system made her even more certain that she didn’t belong in such a fancy, swanky place. Upon arriving at the lobby, the building’s residents frowned once they caught sight of her.

Emma had changed into jeans, boots, and her favorite red leather jacket. She didn’t think his apartment building had a dress code, but apparently it was an unspoken rule to dress more impressively. Avoiding eye contact with those in her vicinity, she took the first available elevator to the 22nd floor and arrived there swiftly.

Walking briskly to his apartment door, she raised her hand to press the doorbell, but paused. She was a tad early and wondered if he would comment on that. He would, no doubt, use it as an excuse to flirt with her more. Brushing the thought aside, she rang the bell and patiently waited for him to open the door.

The door opened, bringing in the putrid smell of booze. Emma frowned and took a step back as the scent wafted into her senses.

“About time! Why the hell are you - ?”

A second later, she gasped. For a moment, the guy at the door was a dead ringer for Killian Jones. However, his facial features were much lighter and less maintained. He wore a green scarf around his neck and looked very tired as he leaned against the doorframe, a bottle of beer in his hand. When he spoke, his voice had a similar accent to Killian’s.

“Killian? Is this your girl? Quite gorgeous, ain’t she?” he said slurringly, leering at her lecherously.

Killian’s voice rang out a second later. Emma caught sight of him in a suit and tie; she was relieved to see that he wasn’t drunk. He wore a white apron over his clothes and she was pleased that he was actually cooking for her. A night with a well-cooked meal would definitely put her in a better mood than the tense anxiety she had experienced for the past couple days.

“Robin, where are your manners? Let her in,” Killian said irritably, crossing his arms.

Thankfully, Robin behaved as he asked and moved aside. She walked in, finding the apartment the same as always. A pleasant smell of spices and meats came from the kitchen and her stomach grumbled. She couldn’t remember the last time a guy had cooked for her and she was finding his culinary skills one of his most attractive assets.

“Darling, I must apologize for my mate. His girlfriend kicked him out and he’s decided to crash here,” he explained, looking a little embarrassed. He blushed and looked absolutely adorable, especially when he began scratching the back of his neck.

“It’s fine,” she said, hanging up her red leather jacket on the coat rack. “It was a little funny, actually.”

“Very rude, though,” Killian said, throwing Robin another pointed glance that he didn’t notice. His friend had deposited himself on the couch and began watching a soccer game on the TV.

“Trust me, I’ve met guys way worse than him,” she assured Killian, taking a seat on the leather divan.

“Like that strip club you work at?” Killian reminded her, smirking.

It was her turn to blush. She was about to explain when Killian’s friend cut in.

“You’re a stripper? Damn, Killian. You get all the good ones,” Robin said enviously, taking a swig of beer.

“I’m not a stripper,” she said defensively. “That was just a cover so I could….well, you know.”

The oven dinged and she was grateful that she didn’t have to explain anymore, “Come on, love. Dinner’s ready.”

Their meal passed uneventfully. For a vampire, Killian really knew how to make a good steak: juicy and succulent. The creamy and flavorful mashed potatoes actually made her moan in delight, making him squirm. She was grateful that Robin had quieted down with his lewd comments. Instead, he chose to occasionally yell or curse at the television if his team made an error. Pretty soon, he was on the couch fast asleep, snoring obnoxiously.

“So….you want to help me then?” Killian said at the end of their meal as he sipped his drink.

“What are you drinking?” Emma asked curiously.

“Rum….and animal blood,” he said with a wink.

Emma wrinkled her nose, “Uh, ok….what do I have to do then?”

“I think we should arrange weekly meetings. My friend Belle works for a legal firm and has….experience with Gold,” he said, frowning. “Does that work with your schedule?”

“It’s alright. I’m usually free at nights, unless I’m working a case.”

Killian took out a notebook and began scribbling something. After he finished, he shoved it to her.

“I want you to write every detail you can about Gold. His habits, where he goes, who he talks to. Just anything you know.”

“I can do that,” Emma said, taking the notebook. “You know something strange? I’ve been in the elevator with him a couple times and I noticed he sometimes goes to the basement level. I wonder what’s down there?”

“A torture chamber for his enemies, no doubt,” Killian muttered darkly. “Disgusting bastard.”

“Hey, we don’t know for sure,” Emma reminded out. “I’ve also been meaning to ask….when Gold stabbed your Milah, was there any security footage? Any evidence that could point to him?”

Killian leaned back in his chair, face looking pensive and mournful. “Unfortunately, love, he stole them away from me. I don’t know how he did it, but they were gone the morning after he killed her.”

Emma stood abruptly, a thought forming in her head, “They must be in his safe. I’ve been in his office a dozen times and that thing’s always heavily locked.”

Killian frowned, taking in her words. “To steal that would be quite a challenge.”

“Leave it to me,” Emma said, grinning. “I have experience with thieving. I could get the tapes by the end of the week.”

Killian’s expression changed to a tone unfamiliar to Emma. It wasn’t until he spoke that she realized he was worried about her. Her heart filled with joy, for even if they didn’t know each other that well yet, she was impressed with how much he cared for her.

“Be careful, lass. Gold isn’t a merciful man. And I shudder to think what punishments he has in store for those who disobey him.”

“I’ll be alright,” she reassured him, polishing off her glass of wine. “What do we do now then?”

Killian slowly placed his hand on her thigh, gently stroking it. Emma felt herself grow wetter, just by his touch.

“I might have….some ideas, love.”

After washing up the dishes, he drew her in for a passionate kiss that made her grow even more wetter with excitement. She jumped into his arms and he caught her as she put her legs around his waist. Carrying her through the hallways, she broke their kiss as she took in the sex room; it was the the same as it was when she had left. However, she noticed that he had placed a flogger and paddle on the silk bedspread. She released herself from his arms and walked over to the bed.

“Cocky, are we?” she smirked, holding up the paddle.

“My assumption was correct, was it not?” Killian said lowly, voice growing sultrier by the second.

Emma rolled her eyes, “Ok, fine. I do enjoy spanked. It does make for good foreplay.”

“Then what are we waiting for?” he said. Emma squealed as he grabbed her around the waist and bent her over the edge of the bed. Unbuttoning her jeans, he shoved them down her legs and grinned when he laid eyes on her lacy white panties.

“If I didn’t know any better, Emma, I would say you knew what to expect from our meeting tonight,” Killian said.

“Could you just get on with it?” Emma said exasperatedly..

She was rewarded with a harsh slap on her ass that caused her to jolt forward and gasp. She couldn’t remember the last time a guy had realized her kinks and read her like an open book. His superhuman strength made this kink of hers even more enticing. She shivered in excitement as he picked up the paddle.

“How many do you think you can take, love?”

She paused and thought; Emma wanted to impress him, but at the same time, she hadn’t done this in a long time. She trusted him not to go too far, but still couldn’t settle on a number. Seconds passed and she didn’t give an answer. Killian gave her another spank, making her yelp in alarm. His fingers sought out her warmth and groaned when he realized just how wet she was.

“For making me wait, I will add another ten spanks,” he growled into her ear. “Now, answer me.”

She grew more aroused as his voice became darker and more angry. “Ten, please.”

Killian rose up, “Twenty in total then. You remember our safe word from last time?”

She nodded and with that, he began spanking her.

He held her tightly with one arm so that she wouldn’t move as much. He gave her the first ten in quick succession, leaving no room for thought as to who was in charge here. She grew even wetter with every hit, her arousal soaking her thighs. Emma tried to keep her voice down, hoping his walls weren’t paper thin, but she couldn’t help it. Every spank made her gasp and scream in pleasure.

“Ten more left. I think I’ll spank you over my knee this time.”

“Oh yes,” she moaned, failing to keep the arousal out of her tone.

Emma clenched her legs tightly, fighting off the urge to press her fingers to her wet heat. He sat on the bed and maneuvered her so she was in his lap. From this angle, she could feel his growing hardness and resisted the thought of taking him into her mouth.

“Ready, love?”

She nodded and groaned in pleasure as he gave her the last ten spanks slower. His forearm rested upon the small of her back; he even teased a couple hits, causing her to flinch before he even touched her. He never hit the same place twice and varied the strength of each one. When he released her from his lap, she was at the very edge, desperate for an orgasm.

“Swan, I have never seen a woman so soaked,” he said, lighting fingering her clit.

Emma moaned, “Can you just fuck me already?”

He wasted no time in divesting his own pants and shirt. She shoved her panties down her legs and laid her head down on the pillows. Killian drew her into a fiery kiss, making her melt into him. Emma could feel his hardness pressing against her thigh, just as aroused as she was. Right before he was about to penetrate her, he paused.

“Love, I wish to bite you again….your blood is so delicious and enticing. Would you allow me the pleasure again?”

Emma nodded, “Yeah, yeah, just fuck me, Killian.”

She moaned passionately when he entered her and thrusted in deeply. She grabbed onto his shoulders, wanting him as close as possible. His chest brushed against her, making her pale nipples harden.

“You’re so big….I really love this,” she gasped, struggling to find words to describe how she felt.

“I too, lass,” he grunted, pushing deeper into her.

It took only a couple more thrusts to bring her to orgasm. He bite down on her neck nearly a second after she started coming. Emma screamed in pleasure as she grabbed the back of his neck and urged him forward, giving him access to drink more. He wasted no time and the taste of her blood drove him to his own release too.

Emma gasped as the last vestiges of her orgasm subsided. Despite achieving their releases, Killian was still drinking deeply from her, occasionally muttering praises for her blood. Unfortunately, even if he had fed from her before, she still felt herself passing out, falling into darkness. She heard him whisper her name as he withdrew from her throat, but she couldn’t speak. She drifted farther away….

The first thing Emma registered when she woke up was the cold.

It surprised her, for it was summer after all. She opened her eyes slowly and turned her head, finding an entire breakfast platter laid out for her. He had tucked her into another one of the bedrooms, probably one for guests. It looked bare and unused.

“Love, you alright?”

Killian stood in the doorway, arms laden with blankets and hot water bottles. He looked fearful for her again, much like he had when she had suggested stealing the tapes from Gold. Her heart filled with joy again, for she couldn’t remember the last time someone had cared for her like this.

“I think so,” Emma muttered, pressing a hand to her head. “I’m just a little cold and tired, that’s all.”

He came over to her and laid an extra blanket atop her body. Fussing over the state of her health, he put hot water bottles under her to bring up her body’s temperature. She wanted to tell him to stop, because the cynical side of her started placing those thoughts in her head again. He was just going to leave like all the others had. He wouldn’t really care for her once their work was over.

“I’m ok, Killian. I should probably get to work.”

She made to get out of bed, but even swinging her legs to the edge of the bed made her feel woozy. Killian placed his hands on her shoulders and shifted her head back onto the pillows. Even if she wanted to resist, it would be difficult to. A vampire’s superhuman strength was unmatched by any supernatural creature.

“Rest, darling,” he said softly, brushing her hair away from her face. “I’ll bring you coffee too. Dark roast?”

“Yeah,” she muttered, lying back down as he left the room.

On second thought, she could definitely get used to this….however long it lasted.

Emma went to work the next day and tried to go about her work normally. Mary Margaret, in particular, kept asking why she looked so pallid and tired, but she just brushed her concerns aside as she went to Gold’s office to deliver some copies of a case report.

“Ah, Miss Swan. Thank you for those copies. Please file them in the right cabinet. I’ll be heading out to lunch.”

She frowned, but didn’t say a word as he left his office. Such a task was for his secretary, but since had fired the last couple, he waiting for next one. The guy certainly wasn’t good with people.

Her heart nearly skipped a beat when she realized where she was. In Gold’s office. Alone.

Her eyes scanned the room carefully, hoping to catch a glimpse of a security camera. Surely he wouldn’t place one in his own room? She spotted one on his desk, disguised as a pencil sharpener. Smiling at the cleverness, she casually placed the copies right in its line of sight. She scanned the room once more, even the ceilings and cracks in the walls, but she couldn’t find any else.

Heart pounding, she took out a hairpin from her braid as she made her way to the safe. Thankfully, it was composed of a series of simple locks, rather than a combination. That made this whole process much, much easier. Emma also took out plastic gloves from her pocket, so that she wouldn’t leave any fingerprints. Keeping her motions as silent as possible, she began picking the five locks of the case.

The first one was relatively easy to pick, a classic pin and tumblr lock. The next two were a bit more difficult, costing her a couple more valuable minutes, but she managed to open them. The last two, however, nearly made her scream in anger. She kept her cursing to a minimum and tried her best to concentrate. Any minute now, someone could walk in and find her doing this. They would, no doubt, be far more loyal to their boss - who paid their salaries - rather than a random coworker.

Emma nearly cheered when the final lock was opened. The safe creaked ever so slightly when she opened the door, but thankfully, didn’t set off any alarms. She pushed down a gasp when she laid eyes on the contents of his safe.

It was nearly full to the brim. Everything one could think of was stashed in that tiny place, struggling to get out. She wondered how on earth a man could be so secretive. Just as she had scanned his room, she scanned the safe to find the tapes, careful not to touch anything or change where anything was. Finally, she found a memory card labeled in Gold’s tidy handwriting.

January 26, 2007

That was the date of Milah’s death; she was positively sure of it. Carefully removing it and placing it in her pocket, she went about re-locking the five locks of the safe. This proved to be less challenging and she finished it in just two minutes. Taking off the gloves and replacing the hairpin in her braid, Emma picked up the papers she had to file.

Just as she was about to open the cabinet, an irate voice rang out behind her.

“Miss Swan?”

[tink-bell]

Name: 

Jaby/Mom

Characters: 

Tink Bell (closed rip), Rita Saluki-Sykes, Duchess LaBlanc, DeSoto Sykes, Adam Best, Soleil (closed rip)

Pick one of your characters and talk about their growth (we recommend choosing an older character, but it’s up to you!) What about their story has surprised you? What are you proud of? How have they changed from their original inception to now? 

Tink Bell: These three years have been one hell of a roller coaster for Tink. It seems like just yesterday I was writing my town alcoholic hell-bent on having a good time even though inside she was a mess. When we first saw Tink, she was your typical punk-rock rebel without a cause. Her idea of a good time was a good lay, a bottle of tequila, and whatever drugs she could find. She was an absolute mess. And as the years progressed we saw Tink sort of lose herself. She got lost in the bottle and the drugs and the dark spiral that was her mind. She lost some good friends (Simba) in the process and made some unexpected ones (Copper, I’m talkin’ about you). But like a phoenix she rose from the ashes and repaired herself and those friendships she lost. She got an amazing girlfriend who literally went through hell and back with her (pun intended). And now as the year closes, so does this chapter of Tink’s life. Her life of adventure with Sophie is starting and it’s the ending I always wanted for Tink. Cue girl walking into the sunset with a bag slung over her shoulder ready to take on the world.

Adam Best: My babe I’ve had the second longest, not counting the time I dropped him for personal reasons. He’s also a character that has been through a lot. We’ve seen Adam be the surly young man who only wants to punish himself for all the death and destruction he’d caused. He was grappling with the loss of his parents and the loss of his first serious girlfriend. That’s a lot for a dude. He made mistakes, hurt people he grew to care about. Then he got himself a best friend and then a boyfriend and things were looking up for our dear Adam. Then Jaby had an existential life crisis and all that went to shit. Adam found a journal that said you could get rid of the curse by killing the wolf that killed you and guess what? Adam went to Greece and got his ass kicked. But it was a brand new starting point for me and my boy. It allowed me to delve into Adam’s need for a normal human life and try to figure out a way to reconcile it with the fact he will never have that. I expected Adam to remain very surly when I picked him back up and to an extent he has. But he’s also moved away from that. He’s no longer filled with the same angst. Instead it’s changed and evolved into something so much more. He’s no longer mourning his parents and Jennifer but instead mourning the life he’ll never get to have. It’s something I never expected from him and I’m honestly very excited to see where it takes us.

Pick another character and talk a little about where you WANT them to go. What are your plans for them going into the new year? 

DeSoto Sykes: Ugh man, I have so much planned for DeSoto. Lauren and I have actually talked out a lot with these brothers and where we want them to end up. I know he’s going to stay a big presence in Swynlake. I’d love for him to become one of the big kingpins in town. It would be hilarious because that’s what his father was back in New York and it’s what he’s been running from for nearly three years. I want him to grow and realize that having people you care about isn’t necessarily a weakness. Des has a long long way to go and his story is far from over.

Rita Saluki-Sykes: It’s no secret that Rita has become my loudest muse, slowly taking the place of Tink if I’m honest. I’ve only had her for a year or so but she’s already been put through the ringer. Her marriage went from one of necessity to one that was almost over to finally something that resembles what she’s always wanted. Even more so now that she’s got her own little kiddo on the way. I’d like to see Rita settle into that mother role. From what we’ve seen she enjoys the night life, partying and eating up all the attention she can get. But with her little one all that is going to change and she’s going to have to become that mother figure. And she’s going to have to balance care and attention for Ollie with the new baby. It’ll be interesting to see how she juggles being a businesswoman, wife, and mother.

Pick a thread or a plot that you’re proud of and talk about why you loved it.  

UHM HELLO INTO THE FOREST. Two years ago I did one of these and said how I wanted Soleil to tap into her powers and channel her rage and this is the result of that. This plot was hands down my favorite plot I’ve ever done. It gave me a chance to break Soleil down to her darkest depths, fueled by the loss of Zero and then the fact KNIGHTS or whatever were hurting things in her forest. It was a slow burn plot and one that took a lot of work from everyone involved and it culminated into the best thing I’ve ever witnessed.

In terms of your own writing, identify 1-3 strengths and talk about why you think it’s one of your strengths.

Voice. I still think voice is something that I have a good grasp on when it comes to my characters. From Rita’s and DeSoto’s New York accents to Duchess’ French lilt and prim and proper upbringing, I think it’s something that shows distinctly in my writing.

Villains. I love my villains, I love devling into their minds and figuring out what makes them tick. And I’m tooting my own horn when I say that I’m pretty damn good at it. From Taka to Oogie (however brief he may have been), I’ve brought some pretty interesting villains to BDRP and I hope to continue to do so. I’ve got a few character ideas at the ready that I am more than eager to bring to life.

In terms of your own writing, identify 1-3 areas of improvement.

Plotting! I am the absolute worst when it comes to coming up and approaching people with plots. And I think a big part of that is because I really love for things to develop organically. I’m not one to nudge my characters into something I’m not sure of. I need to break out of that so that I can actually accomplish some of the things I want to for my characters.

Direction. It’s easy for me to lose direction when writing. A reply will start off as one thing and then before I know it it’s shifted to something else entirely. It makes writing an arduous process and often irritating. 

Pick one of your plots, or even just a character, and come up with a list of 3-5 “mentor texts” where you can look for inspiration or research, then write a short (2-4 sentences) why you picked those texts. (For example, if I picked Apollo, reading “Akata Witch,” “Children of Blood and Bone,” “Trials of Apollo” series, and Homer’s Iliad might provide inspiration for different reasons– the former two for Nigerian culture and magic and the latter two for a deeper look at Greek Mythology. No, you don’t have to have read these books– maybe you just want to read them!)

Okay so picking Soleil’s forest takedown these are the things I’d look into:

Batman comics featuring Poison Ivy - Mainly because Poison Ivy is one of the few female baddies that have the same sort of magic that Soleil has. And she’s gone down Soleil’s path of wanting to take over the world with plants. It’d be a way to get inside of angry Soleil’s mind.

BtVS s6ep22 “Grave” - This is actually the episode of Buffy that sparked this desire to have Soleil go down that path of evil. It was a possible ending for Soleil in which she didn’t turn into a tree and feed her magic to Enchantra as a way to make amends. This episode showed the power of true love (even if that love is platonic) and how it can stop evil. And it was something that I had wanted to experiment with in Soleil.

The Master Book of Herbalism - Okay this book would give insight to what Soleil did. How, even before she was the spring sprite, she had a vast knowledge of plants and how to use them. 

And now, a wishlist! Jot down a few themes or stories or genres etc that you want to maybe pursue in the upcoming year! (i.e. a good ol’ fashion forbidden romance, maybe you want to dig deep into racial identity etc) This doesn’t have to necessarily be attached to any characters or stories you have now– it’s just meant to help you see for yourself what kind of stories call to your heart.

F O R B I D D E N RO M A N C E- like please guys, you don’t know how badly I want one of these. What’s more drama filled than two people who should not be together at all? C’moooooooooooon Drugs- I have always always been involved in the drug scene in Swynlake. Taka, Lock, Tink, and now Des. I love fucking people up with drugs and exploring those motivations. Coffee shop au type romance/bromance Slow burn, something that starts as nothing and then sooooo slowly turns to something more Friendships Frenemies

OPTIONAL: Why do you RP?

I RP because it’s still my escape. I enjoy it more than I enjoy most things. It gives me an outlet to channel whatever it is I’m feeling and don’t we all need that. Not to mention Mk and Lauryl own my soul at this point and there is no hopes of me ever actually leaving this place.

[aurimeanswind]

Friends and High Places—Sunday Chats (7-9-17)

I’m in the sky. Yes, I can fly and write at the same time. No, but really, I am currently on my flight back home from Austin because apparently Sunday Chats don’t stop for NOTHING. Not since I missed a couple weeks in a row, because apparently people miss this when it’s gone. So let’s chat.

Friends from Far Long and Far Away Places

This weekend was incredibly special for me. Though I’ve definitely mentioned her on Sunday Chats before, today she gets a big dedication. It’s story time.

A little over three years ago my would-be friend Jazz started following me on Twitter because of a mutual love of Game Grumps. Some DMs later we’d be chatting back in forth together ever since August of 2014. It’s not often for me to have someone kind of ethereal, who you can hold a conversation with for almost three years without ever meeting them, but Jazz was that person for me.

It’s been a long time, and I often referred to her in my head as my “pen pal”. Sometimes you can meet people by total happenstance, and it all started with her DMing me about what I went to school for. From there, I found one of the best friends I’d have in my life, and like I said, a near-continuous conversation with the same person for almost three years.

I’m very privileged in this life. For a number of reasons, but one such is that I always try to avoid taking for granted are the folks I have befriended on my journey through writing and gaming. Jazz is a friend I made almost entirely separate from that, separate from any specific community or event. Separate from any one moment and almost entirely through luck and serendipity. It was just a lucky mutual follow.

This weekend I took a trip to Austin so I could finally meet her in person. It’s a trip I had been playing around with for a long while and decided to book on the same weekend as RTX so that I’d be able to see some other friends while I was in town.

I’m lucky that Jazz was totally okay with me selfishly wanting to take up her time and spend plenty of one-on-one time together. What did we do? Well, we talked of course. But more so, I listened. I got to sit and listen to her stories, to her life, about her friends, her opinions, her experiences, and just like that, the continuous conversation that’s already been going on was championed through this weekend. We even sat and watched her favorite movie of all time, Clue, which I had never seen before, and is really pretty great.

Listening to her, I can’t begin to convey to you all, you wonderful Sunday Chats readers, how incredible a person she is. She is fierce. She is strong. To me, she is power embodied. She is inspiring. She takes no bullshit, she is protective, and she is a total and complete badass. To list all the things I admire in her would be to carry on for far too long, and considering she is probably reading this, I’m sure she’d be suuuuper embarrassed if I did, but I’ll try and keep it succinct.

She’s an award winning journalist. She’s incredibly witty, smart, and balanced. She is an excellent conversationalist. She is maybe the funniest person I have ever met. She is gorgeous and has a fire that burns on the inside and out. She’s one of my best friends. She was even kind enough to listen to me rant on about my life, my troubles, and things I’ve never told anyone else in my life, because I can’t help but say too much around her.

I’d count her amongst three that I depend and rely on truly and completely. Through this last month and a half, where my depression has been incredibly troubling and I’ve been in one of the worst places of my life since 2012, she has been an endless resource of support and comfort, even though she herself is has been through the ringer. She inspires me, makes me smile, and reminds me of how lucky I am to be here.

There are truly only three people in this world I can speak so highly of. She is one of them. I know it’s incredibly sappy, I know it’s a weird thing to splooge about in a massive public post, but I feel like I’ve brushed this friendship to the side like it’s some big secret, this distant friend from the internet. If she will proudly brag about me to her friends in the anticipation of my visit, then guess what? I’m gonna do it to my wonderful readers on my way out of Austin.

Thank you Jazz, for your support, for letting me be a part of your life, and for being an inspiring, fierce, and unendingly kind and caring badass.

Love you lots, J.

What I’ve Been Working On

My workflow is still pretty stilted. I think there is definitely something I’m held up on, and while I’m writing every day with insistence, I don’t know if it’s a help or a hindrance at this point. I’m playing around with getting to the 1000 day mark, which should fall sometime in this coming December, and then stop writing for a little while. We’ll see where things go and if any projects lift off the ground between now and then, but tentatively, I want to throw that out there.

I’m restarting a piece I was working on a long time ago on Overwatch, and I’m retouching up my first Case Study. I’m going to reshoot the first episode of Case Study, and now that ExtraLife is out of the way and I have a super nice new computer, I’ll be able to edit video ago. I’m definitely very concerned for the process, since I’m more than a little rusty, but I’m excited to see how it turns out. I need to reconfigure a few things about how I shoot the show, but I think it’ll look pretty good and sound great.

I also wrote a few one-off blog posts this week, which you can read HERE. One was on the Fourth of July, and the other was after watching the first episode of Netflix’s Castlevania series.

What’s on Tap

Overwatch

Yo I’m still playing Overwatch

I think i am generally winning a bit more now

That new character Doomfist looks pretty goddamn awesome doesn’t he?

I really like Overewatch still. It’s now pretty much all I play until I get into Nier Automata and Splatoon 2.

Castlevania Netflix Show

I have now watched all four episodes of the first season of this show. And it is, in my humble opinion, fantastic.

It definitely has a bit of a Game of Thrones vibe, in that it feels like a lived in world that has an established history, but it doesn’t boggle itself down too much in character names and family houses.

It just jumps into a world and it’s first episode, which is all about setting up Dracula as a villain, is just absolutely fantastic.

The rest of the series is about Trevor Belmont, the protagonist, who ends up being just as interesting as Dracula, but has a much longer arc, and seeing him slowly evolve as a character is really great.

The show is definitely gory and brutal, which I expected, and I think with the artstyle and the animation it does it super well. I was definitely a bit triggered by the graphic scene of *spoilers* someone being eaten. But y’all know that’s my weird specific phobia, whatcha gonna do?

The way it ends leaves me begging for more, and it’s already apparently been renewed for a second season. I cannot wait for more of this show, and I am totally hooked. I really recommend it, because it is a very good interpretation of the Casltevania universe and the way its tropes and ideas, like the whip, are conveyed into visuals, is fucking awesome.

Tomba 1 & 2

So I finished Tomba 1! Yay! I’ve been replaying that after finishing Alundra

Tomba is a great game! I think for the first time I ddi every last one of the quests in the run, all 130, which was a ton of fun.

I started Tomba 2, which was in the big switch from 2D to 3D, and it actually still looks pretty great.

For a 3D game from that era, it’s definitely super chunky and blocky, but the characters are very distinguishable, and it is 100% fully voice acted. The voice acting isn’t amazing, but for the time period it’s actually relatively stellar!

Tomba 2 is just such an amazing Metroidvania/RPG/Adventure game. I cannot recommend it enough.

Zelda Breath of the Wild

Oh look at this one cropping back up. I decided to get the DLC before shipping off to Austin this weekend, and it was a great idea.

Though I haven’t really dipped me toes in any of the new content, using the new map feature, I’ve been able to explore the areas I missed before. In my initial 110-ish hours I was uh… surprisingly thorough, let’s say. But goddamn.

I still have a few shrines left, 17 now, I believe, and I really want to find all of them. I have yet to consult a guide.

Questions

As always you can get your question in Sunday Chats by replying to my tweet on Sunday afternoons with the hashtag #SundayChats in it!

Hrm. I really like them as they are, I’ll be honest. I don’t think they’re necessarily perfect. I think, and I had a recent conversation about this with Jazz actually, that the effort to make Snape a redeemable character all at the last minute felt a little forced. It worked for me, but I think if you wanted to make it really believably, for everyone, folks like Jazz who really hates him, you could have layered it out a lot more. We get a little bit of it in book 5 and the rest in book 7. Now I think the opposite works super well for Dumbledore, where you kind of learn about his troubled past in book 7, and it works so well because you can clearly tell he is aspiring and working toward redemption so much throughout the rest of his life. The kind of breaking down of his character in the final entry of the series hits so hard because we get to see that so well reflected through Harry.

I think there are plenty of characters that could have been fleshed out. I honestly would have loved to just spend more time in that world, more time in the classes, more time learning the history, but I don’t think that is a thing that would have worked in this story, Harry’s story, specifically.

I also haven’t read Cursed Child yet, still. And I’m still maybe a little concerned it’ll ruin a bit of the magic for me. I really enjoyed Fantastic Beasts though, in spite of its issues.

I mentioned it a little bit above, but yeah, I thought it was fantastic. Just the character work specifically worked so well for me. There was a lot of attention given to make Dracula such a sympathetic villain. Even though it’s essentially a trope we’ve seen before, I think it’s used really well, because beyond the incidents that set up his villainy in the series, we get this nice little glimpse at his past distaste for humanity. It leaves you with questions about history, ones that don’t need to be answered, but you want to be, which are always the best questions because consulting them in your mind engrosses you even more in the world.

And good god is everything about the last episode just fucking perfect.

This is a really hard one. If that’s something you’re going through, I’m sorry. It isn’t easy. I am someone who has never been broken up with, I am the break up-er. Not that that’s something to brag about, which I’m not, I just want folks to know the position I’ve been in.

I’ll say this, and please hear me out on this. Assuming things didn’t end with cheating or murder or physical/emotional abuse, assuming it was a thing where it was distance, fighting, anger or animosity, or just things not working out, remember this: empathy. Whether you’re the break up-er or the break up-ee, I think it’s really important to remember that the other person is a human being, and what’s more, they’re going to handle this in their own way. Intimate companionship is really hard to manage and it’s not a one way street. If both folks aren’t on the same page, it’s just not going to work out. This doesn’t mean you need to pocket blame, or hate the other person, or look for reasons why things aren’t working or didn’t work out. In my history, the moment you’re really questioning whether things are worth continuing means you at the very least need to have that conversation with your partner.

They’re human and you need to respect that. I don’t think either person should lob insults or take enjoyment out of a breakup. Again, we’re excluding the worst case scenarios here.

I think you should take a deep hard look at yourself, at your feelings, and genuinely ask yourself: do I still want to be friends with this person? I know for me the answer has always been no. I need that distance because being close to them would either fill me with guilt or pain, or just a general concern that the other is in pain any time they’re around me. That’s what’s worked for me, but if you or the other make that decision, I really believe you need to respect it.

To kind of top it off here, I think a lot of distance can do a lot of good. Stop checking their social media, unfollow/unfriend/or even block them if you need to. Get them out of your view and focus one what you need to do to get yourself in a stable and happy place again. You both need to do this, you both need to figure out how to make yourselves happy without the other again, and that’s not easy, but that’s the best advice I can give.

I know that’s pretty contrary to a lot of modern advice of be friends, be cool, be amicable, but I just don’t think that shit happens really. I’ve seen it, I’ve seen it myself, but it’s very hard, and it’s very rare, so don’t be afraid of opting for the easier choice. Do what’s best for you. Take care of yourself.

Haha, well this is hopefully my last trip for a hot minute. I don’t know. I don’t want to make any promises. This most recent trip to see a friend was special because I had never actually seen them before, so it was really important for me to meet them and spend time there. The next one? I really don’t know. I think I need to spend some time figuring some of my own shit out now. I have a lot on my mind lately and a lot of things I want to start and get done.

Oh, and very little money.

Ahh this is a really hard question.

I like the standards and the fast food burgers. I could go for any. But the best burger, that’s tough.

I’ll say this, I take my burger a very specific way. One, it always has to be a cheeseburger. If it’s not a cheeseburger you can just leave thank you. I always take my burger with Lettuce, Mayonnaise, and Ketchup. I know, it’s a weird combo, but it’s the best. I got it from my older brother Brady, though his included a tomato, which I just don’t fuck with, so that is my perfect burger wherever I go. I sometimes throw grilled onions on there if it’s an option too.

I don’t know if it’s my all time favorite, but there is this eastern chain near me called Cheeburger Cheeburger, and their 1/3 pound burger with my chosen toppings on it was really good. Their bread was always super flakey, and they were real-ass thick burgers too.

As a general style of burger that I love, you can’t go wrong with a good patty melt. My go-to usually if I’m at a new diner.

So my friend told me to listen to this song and now that I have, I see why. I know a bit of the story behind it and it is very... powerful. I mean, it’s hard to imagine the girl that did Tik-Tok is doing this song years later, but I think it really is reflective of her and her soul and her pain.

I thought it was really beautiful. I thought it was very poignant.

This is a tricky one. I’ll say I have two. I really love the triggers nowadays. Obviously the Switch does not have analogue triggers, which is unfortunate, but I get it what with it being a handheld console as well. But man do those Xbox one and PS4 triggers feel reeeeeal good. If i had to pick a specific one, it’d be the right trigger, because it usually does the shooty-bang-bang in the video games.

Outside of that, you can’t go wrong with the bottom face button. Usually jump, or hit, or fuck-up, as I like to call it. That’s A, or B, or X, depending on which controller you have, and it’s a rad button. Don’t futz with it.

Having been in Austin all weekend I have not gotten the chance to see Spider-Man Homecoming, but after hearing the words on it, it has skyrocketed up my must-see list. I may even go to see it tomorrow morning before I go to work. Goddamn do I want to see it. I did see Clue this weekend though! That’s a great movie!

But really, Peter Parker is like, my legit hero. I loved him as a kid. He is for sure my favorite Marvel hero, and probably my second or third favorite superhero in general, behind Superman and Batman, depending on the day. I wanted to be a photographer when I was younger, before I wanted to be a doctor and then enthusiast press, so when I found out that Peter Parker was a photographer too, I thought it was even more rad.

Did you know that the Polar Bear is the largest land carnivore? Or land predator, one of the two. When they stand on their hind legs, Polar bears can measure over 12 feet tall.

Polar Bears are fucking. Awesome.

The vacation was incredibly helpful. Being around someone who has been helping me get through such a troubling time in my life and also just sleeping in and relaxing was so, so helpful.

Of the Clue characters, it’s so goddamn hard to choose. I almost want to say Mrs White because of her absurd monologue in the last ending alone. I don’t know if I’ve laughed that hard like… ever. Good fucking god. Like holy shit.

I also just love Mr. Green because of every absurd physical thing he does in that movie, and Tim Curry is incredible. Just incredible. They’re all great, but those are the three standouts for me, I’d say, with maybe Mrs. White taking it.

Trevor is the villain in Clue. Though I see him as more of a Mr. Body character, who is playing everyone behind the scenes. He is the villain because he loves his power too much.

Jesus Christ Roger. I can only wonder what the people who don’t know you but only see your tweets in Sunday Chats must think you’re like.

I have never seen Grown Ups 2, nor do I think I ever want to. It’s an infamously bad movie, from what I understand. I mean, there is a podcast about watching it every week for an entire year that is literally called “The Worst Idea of All Time”. Also I take great offense to being compared to David Spade and I’m not 100% sure why.

I can’t speak to Star Ocean 3, but I loooove replaying old favorites. You can see from what i have on tap this week that I’m going and playing Tomba 1 and 2 as is. Those are two very old games, and while a little rough around the edges and certainly not perfect, they hold up for me quite a bit.

I think there is definitely a level of nostalgia that can get you through certain things. Like, when I went back and played Tales of Symphonia again within the last few years, it’s a lot less dynamic and fun than I remember it being. The voice acting is also a whole lot worse than I remember it being too, but I still really love that game. I still finished it and played it through to the end. I am someone who regularly goes back and replays games, and just like gaining something from a movie on a second viewing or reading a book through again, you’re almost guaranteed to get something new out of it. If you’re open to the idea of something maybe not holding up as well as you remember it doing, than I say go for it. Just don’t let that be all your time like it has been for me recently.

I think it totally is. Especially if you have an emissary of that nostalgia to boot. For example, I think Tim Gettys really reps the Crash games as far as nostalgia and looking-back-love is concerned.

I think knowing where you’re at with something is also super big though. Like, are you into 3D/2D platformers, or more importantly, platformers from that PS1 era? Because Crash Bandicoot sure as shit is one of those. I went back and played the first Crash again recently and I know it’s not a super great game. I just know that in my heart of hearts. But I also remember really liking Crash 2 and 3, especially 3, and I want to go back and see those two very much. I have yet to get back into the N-Sane trilogy, but I’m excited to, and I think I’ll get a good amount out of those later two games. Just set yourself up with the right expectation and know that if you’re trying to specifically “buy into someone else’s nostalgia” that you need to see those games through the same scope that they did.

This is a mean question. I mean honestly, if I could hangout with you every week you know I would.

Okay real answer time. It’s probably that fucking Mrs. White monologue. You hyped it up to me while we were watching it but good fucking lord. I cannot overemphasize this: it was solid gold.

Also, I want it to be known that Jazz was fucking saying the words along with the movie as we watched it, and multiple times I had to stare at her until she stopped and then apologized. She has seen that movie waaaaay too many times.

Spelunky and Overwatch. Both are incredibly well made and I’ve been revisiting both time and time again, with months of distance between play sessions, and they have not let me down.

Okay, well I’m not about to sit here and make some declarative statement like that. I think for me, yes, it is my favorite Zelda game. It even beats out A Link to the Past, and if you want to know specifically where I’m at with it, you can read my review here: http://irrationalpassions.com/review/the-legend-of-zelda-breath-of-the-wild/

I think to deny the ingenuity, courage, and grace by which Breath of the Wild is executed would be incredibly inept of any video game player out there. I understand that a lot more folks than I have issues with it, many of them being hosts on my very own podcast. I get it. I get that the story isn’t 100% there for them. It really was for me. I get that the gemaplay doesn’t seem as new and original to them. It was for me. I think Zelda refines and executes on ideas barely even approached in other video games, and it does it with grace, style, and little to no issue. Especially in a post-performance-patch world, it is something incredible.

I think there is an argument there. I don’t know if I am even the one to make it though.

At least... not yet.

The Checklist

It’s all about MBMBaM for me this week. If you’re not familiar, My Brother, My Brother and Me is one of my all time favorite podcasts. In fact, it’s my favorite non-video game podcast. I love and adore it, and I think you should go listen to it. When I’ve been depressed recently, I’ve just been re listening to old episodes of MBMBaM and it’s made me very goddamn happy.

https://itunes.apple.com/us/podcast/my-brother-my-brother-and-me/id367330921?mt=2

I also started watching Polygon’s Monster Factory this week, and hoooooly shit is it funny. In this series, McElroy brothers and Polygon staff Justin and Griffin McElroy make horrific creatures in video game create-a-characters and go ham with them. I’ll provide my favorite episode so far (not that far into the series), which is probably the disaster that Fallout 3 became pretty much immediately.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=LHBzVTCO3nM

I sat and listened to Nick Scarpino do a couple of great one-on-one GameOverGreggy Shows this weekend in my downtime, and I can’t pick between the two, so I am just linking both.

Overcoming Anxiety - https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=taPC2fOx5BY

Brian Altano - https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=QD8W-kpK3ew

Okay. I’m done. I’m writing this at home, finishing everything up, formatting, and then posting. I know it’s posting super late, and I’m sorry about that.

I have a melancholy weight with me now. It’s time to start looking ahead and I really don’t know what’s ahead for now. Both exciting, but right now, I find myself more anxious than excited. It’s a somber note to end Sunday Chats with, but it’s an honest one.

But hey, thanks for reading, and do me a favor, eh?

Keep it real.

[couchedthoughts-blog]

A Song of Ice & Fire: Bran and Tyrion in A Game of Thrones

I finished them six years ago, but I still spend a good chunk of my time thinking about these dumb books. With a podcast on the horizon, I’ve decided I need a place to organize my thoughts before recording each episode. So, I’m creating an ongoing series of A Song of Ice & Fire-related blog posts. This week, I’d like to examine Bran and Tyrion in the first book, A Game of Thrones.

Why these two? Well, when my cohost, Daniel, and I were brainstorming ways to bring the books to life, we decided to pair up characters in each episode. There was no major reason for doing this, but we knew we wanted to examine the books through characters rather than chapters. By pairing characters, we could observe and analyze their stories in refreshing ways. And after way too much of my life devoted to analyzing these books, I’m all about refreshing takes.

For example, if we track Jon and Dany’s arcs side-by-side, we can see them both grappling with power and uncover the complexities of leadership by comparing them to one another. It didn’t take us long to pair off each A Game of Thrones POV character, Jon and Dany being the obvious first pairing. But at the end we were left with two outliers who seemingly had little in common: Tyrion Lannister and Bran Stark. Upon further inspection, however, I found that this “outlier” status is sort of the crux of who each of them is and how they function within the story.

In Bran, we have a younger son of a powerful noble who is paralyzed and bed-ridden for much of the book. He’s quickly abandoned by most of his family, left to figure out what it means to be crippled and dealing with dark prophetic dreams that involve a three-eyed crow. All of this adds up to a plotline that operates very much outside the world of the other POVs.

Tyrion is also the younger son of a powerful noble, a dwarf, and loathed by most of his family. And pretty much everybody else in Westeros, but not us! He’s taken prisoner in the middle of A Game of Thrones and never receives credit for his many talents and successes. These circumstances all but guarantee his operating on the periphery of the other characters, too.

The first and most obvious connection between Bran and Tyrion is that they’re both disabled. We see this connection play out sweetly when Tyrion stops by Winterfell on the way back to King’s Landing to give Bran plans for a saddle that will allow him to ride a horse (despite not having the use of his legs). This encounter brings together a boy at the beginning of his life as a disabled person and a man well-versed in the daily degradations of that kind of life. But it’s a moment of hope shared by two characters who have been sent through the ringer. Although Bran is fresh off the horror of his "accident," he feels true excitement for the first time since it happened. And even though Tyrion generally meets optimism with derision, he takes a real pleasure in providing happiness to somebody in a sad state he’s all too familiar with.

Both characters—at least by the end of the book—are pessimists. And how could they not be? Life has dealt them a cruel hand. But in this moment — and throughout the book, really — we see how desperate for hope they both are. In the beginning of A Game of Thrones, Bran dreams of being a knight and even after those dreams are crushed, he still finds joy in that forest ride and a tingling thrill in the crypts of Winterfell. Bran didn’t fall to his death, he chose to fly. 

And despite Tyrion’s rampant cynicism, the moment he’s thrown in the sky cell, he’s begging for his life. This is a man unhappy with his lot, but also a man who feels that lot is very much worth living. Hope propels Bran and Tyrion throughout the series, though neither of them would acknowledge its presence in their lives.  

I like to think of Tyrion as a roadmap for where Bran’s life could go. Not that I think Bran will end up like Tyrion, but the latter is an example of how cruelty and belittlement manifest in a person for better (and for worse). We can see the sense of abandonment Bran feels and see its effects in Tyrion’s self-sufficiency. We can see the restlessness Bran experiences because of his immobility and see its effects in Tyrion’s intellectual appetite. These conditions will have an impact on who Bran becomes, and we get a sneak peek at that future person by examining Tyrion.

The difference, however, lies in their familial relationships. Where Bran has a loving (though absent) family, Tyrion has only bitter resentment and a valuable name. For this reason, I don’t think Bran will ever travel the path of hatred and vengeance Tyrion is currently on. This is a good thing, knowing where Bran's journey takes him in later books. He has a moral compass in the shape of his father that Tyrion never had, and I think this will keep him on a noble path for the rest of the series. As for Tyrion? Well, we’ll have to see…

Aside from their physical disabilities, there’s another similarity these characters share, which I mentioned briefly: Bran and Tyrion are both second sons. We could talk about the significance of “Second Sons” throughout the series, but I’ll save that for a later discussion. For the purposes of this conversation, however, I’d like to examine its significance for the two characters at hand. The “spare” typically enjoys less pressure from parents and deals with the pros and cons of getting less attention. Both Tyrion and Bran seem to enjoy flying under the radar and both have something of a rebellious streak. Crucially—because the older son’s path is predetermined—the second son has a bit more freedom to create their own path. And we can see this dynamic at work in both their stories. Robb must set out at the head of his father's army, thus Bran is left at Winterfell to find his own path and purpose. And Tyrion, though desperate for the same trust Jaime receives from Tywin, diverges from his family obligations in all sorts of interesting and entertaining ways. They aren't required to risk their lives for duty or inherited power, and that frees them up to risk their lives for something greater.

When I think about Bran and Tyrion, I think of them as The Storyteller and The Reader. Bran is our first POV of the series and he opens the world up to us, like a guide or a narrator. And our first introduction to Tyrion is in the Winterfell library where he’s reading into the early hours of morning. Immediately, we’re meant to identify with him, and we do. Throughout A Game of Thrones, he sees beyond what’s presented to him, "reading between the lines." He notices and enjoys irony. He gathers knowledge, not only from the stories he reads, but also within his own story. We’re always in on the joke with Tyrion, always two steps ahead. And that’s what makes his chapters so compelling. 

Bran operates more like an omniscient narrator. Just look at how his story arc kicks off: He sees something he’s not supposed to see. For most of the book, he can only observe rather than “do.” Most of the in-series legends and fables are told in his chapters. And as we get into the rest of the books, we’ll see his “omniscience” grow stronger and stronger, not to put too fine a point on it. 

When speculating about the conclusion to A Song of Ice and Fire, the first concern fans have is what will happen to our favorite characters. For Bran and Tyrion, in particular, I wonder if their adversity prepared them well for the ravages of ice and fire to come. Or can no amount of physical and emotional endurance prepare a person for the horrors of war (a cataclysmic one, at that)? Maybe Bran and Tyrion are the physical embodiment of the horrors of war, crippled by conflict, abuse and neglect. If so, these scars continue well beyond war, so maybe—just maybe—we’ll see Bran and Tyrion alive at the end, after all.

[books-n-wine]

~**~ Series Review: Lucky Series by Carly Phillips ~**~

***3.5 Stars***

With a premise similar to that of one of my favorite movies, Practical Magic, but with a slight twist I was definitely looking forward to diving into the book and for the most part enjoyed the journey and the special kind of crazy that occurs in a small town, but boy did Derek frustrate the hell out of me. He is a great father and when he isn’t letting the “curse” rule his life a great man, but he put me through the ringer with his “saving” everyone thing. Thank god for Gabby and Holly, Derek’s daughter, they saved this book for me. I loved Gabby’s strength, determination and heart. This woman put herself out there and I loved her for it. Holly was all kinds of precocious goodness and I loved the insight she brought to what was going on, even when she didn’t know it. Gabby and Derek’s journey was sweet and smexy, even with the “curse” hanging over their heads, and though I would have like a little more groveling, I did like how Derek cleared up any lingering doubts about how he felt about Gabby in the end.

There is a suspense/mystery element running throughout the story and though the who wasn’t so much a mystery, I liked how everything played out in the end. Despite my frustration with Derek, this was fun little read filled with fun and interesting characters and I’m looking forward to reading Lucky Streak and finding out how the next Corwin will deal with the curse.

~ Copy provided by the author & voluntarily reviewed ~ 

Long ago, as revenge on a Corwin who stole her son’s fiancee, a witch proclaimed an eternal curse that every Corwin male who married for love would be destined to lose his love and his fortune …

Derek thought he could outsmart the long-standing Corwin curse by breaking up with Gabrielle, his first love— and marrying someone else. Now, divorced and broke, all he has left is his teenage daughter and a healthy respect for ancient sorcery. But then Gabrielle returns, determined to defeat the curse and rekindle their passion. But will her stubborn streak and her unwavering love be the lucky charm Derek so desperately needs?

Release Date: June 6th, 2017

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***4 ‘It’s All About Edward’ Stars***

Is it a bad thing when one of the secondary storylines captures your interest more than the main one? Maybe, maybe not, but that’s kind of what happened with Lucky Streak. For the most part I really liked Mike, the man is all kinds of upstanding, smexy as hell alpha male with a really good heart. Amber was a bit of a mixed bag for me. I admired how dedicated she was to her family and how good her heart truly was, but it took a long time for me to warm up to her. With my feelings towards Amber being all kinds of mixed up, it made it difficult for me to want her and Mike together for the long haul, but then THAT moment hit, which admittedly took a while to happen, and then I was more open to the idea of them together.

That moment actually comes in the form of Edward Corwin, Mike’s father. His character and story was what caught my interest and kept me turning the pages. Even though he wasn’t supposed to be the focus of the story, I felt as if he was the catalyst for a lot of the twists and changes that occurred in the story and I simply enjoyed the hell out of him, even when my heart broke for him.

It’s not everyday where a secondary character takes over a book for me, and I’m a huge fan of well written secondary characters, but it happens and it happened here and I gotta go with my gut.

~ Copy provided by the author & voluntarily reviewed ~

When Mike Corwin awakens after some wild partying in Vegas $150,000 richer and married to Amber, the gorgeous woman he met the night before, he thinks he's hit the jackpot. The bad news is that Amber's a con who takes his money and runs. Seems the family curse has finally hit him. Hard.

But to Amber, Mike isn't business as usual. If only she didn't need the money to ensure her father's safety, she might actually have fallen for the intense lawman. Instead, she's forced to betray him.

Now Mike's hell-bent on divorce and Amber's on the run…but when a twist of fate reunites them, can they turn their run of bad fortune into a lucky streak?

Release Date: June 6th, 2017

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***4 Stars***

Of the three books in the series, Lucky Break is hands down my favorite. Not to say that I didn’t enjoy the first two, because I did, but this one just had that thing that drew me in and held my interest more than the first two. It was sweet, smexy and I enjoyed how the curse was finally dealt with in the end.

I liked Jason and Lauren and though I there were quite a few eye rolling moments with them, I wanted them to find their way back to each other in the end. The biggest obstacle in their way was themselves, not the curse. The amount of over thinking going on was crazy, but I liked how things worked out in the end.

Edward and Clara are hands down my favorites of the series. Even though we didn’t get a lot of time with them, I thought their story was very well done. I liked how they evolved throughout the last two books and how they ended up moving things along.

As for the “curse” I do like how it was finally put to rest. There was a good amount of crazy that happened before it happened, but it was well worth the wait.

While this isn’t my favorite Carly Phillips series out there, it was still an enjoyable read filled with very interesting characters. So if you’re looking for a fun read with a Practical Magic feel to it, then this is the one for you!

~ Copy provided by the author & voluntarily reviewed ~

Jason Corwin knows he should resist his attraction to Lauren Perkins. After all, it was one of her ancestors who came up with the curse that has plagued every Corwin male to misery and the single life. But after one night of mind-blowing sex with his supposed—and very seductive—enemy, he can't bring himself to stay away.

All Lauren wants is to sell her late grandmother's old house and leave the past behind forever. But that's not an easy thing to do with gorgeous contractor Jason Corwin whispering sweet, sexy somethings in her ear. About staying. Can she be the lucky break that Jason needs?

Release Date: June 6th, 2017

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Carly Phillips is the N.Y. Times and USA Today Bestselling Author of over 50 sexy contemporary romance novels featuring hot men, strong women and the emotionally compelling stories her readers have come to expect and love. Carly's career spans over a decade and a half with various New York publishing houses, and she is now an Indie author who runs her own business and loves every exciting minute of her publishing journey. Carly is happily married to her college sweetheart, the mother of two nearly adult daughters and three crazy dogs (two wheaten terriers and one mutant Havanese) who star on her Facebook Fan Page and website. Carly loves social media and is always around to interact with her readers. You can find out more about Carly at www.carlyphillips.com.

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[books-n-wine]

~**~ ARC Review: Without Words by Delancey Stewart ~**~

***4 Stars***

Ahhh this book. This was one of those books where I spent half the book wanting to give the MC’s high fives and the other half wanting to reach through my Kindle and shake some sense into them, but regardless of how much my eyes hurt from all the rolling and the mild case of whiplash Dani and Rob gave me, I enjoyed their journey in its entirety. It brought out all the feels with the sweet and frustrating moments and kept me turning the pages until the very end.

My heart went out to Rob and Dani, it did, because they both have such huge hearts, but these two definitely put me through the ringer. They are both dealing with their own demons and have, in their own way, shut down pieces of themselves in the name of self preservation. I really liked both Rob and Dani even though they did drive me crazy in their own ways, they were genuinely good people who fate decided to toss into the frying pan and see how’d they fare once pulled out of it. And although it took them both a while to figure things out, once they did it was exciting to see where they went with it.

Their journey, both separately and together, was a bumpy one, aka frustrating as h*ll, thanks to both of them loving to have conversations in their head with themselves instead of out loud with each other, but considering what they had both been through up until they met, it was to be expected. What kept me turning the page was that despite the numerous starts and stops they kept evolving and working through their issues, even when they didn’t consciously realize it. When they were just being themselves and shut out the reasons why they couldn’t be together their interactions were sweet and funny and I really liked where they found themselves at the end of the book.

The writing was engaging. the pacing of story was good and liked the dual 1st person POV. There were a couple of secondary storylines I would have like to have gotten a little more out of, but since the story was very concentrated on Dani and Rob and their relationship I can understand why they were left as they were. The secondary cast of characters were done well, though my favorite is Sampson. This is my first read by the author and even with the rollercoaster of a ride Rob and Dani took me on, I really enjoyed it.

~ Copy provided by the publisher via NetGalley  ~

Sometimes love speaks for itself…

After an accident in the line of duty, firefighter Roberto DeRosa’s life is turned upside down. His career fighting fires is over, and he’s left with an uncertain future and an injury that makes communicating difficult for him. The only time words flow easily is when they’re lyrics and he has a guitar in his hands. Talking to women is definitely out, especially if they have bright blue eyes that seem to see right into his soul.

Dani Hodge is on the brink of realizing her dream of opening a small combination wine and book store in San Diego’s funky Ocean Beach neighborhood. But before she can open the doors, there’s work to be done, more work than she can do herself.

When the tattooed guy who completely ignored her at a bar walks by and offers her a hand wrangling a tile saw, Dani can’t afford to say no—and why would she say no to Mr. Strong and Silent when his stare conveys more than words could?

Book Summary

Genre: Contemporary Romance

Published By:  Entangled Publishing

Release Date: May 22nd, 2017

Pages: 245

ASIN: B071HD98GP

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Hello! I'm Delancey Stewart, and I'm glad you found your way to my books and my website.

I write several different series, but they all have one thing in common -- romance! I actually didn't set out to be a romance writer, but that's another story...

I love writing...but my life includes a "day job" and kids, so when I'm not writing, I'm wearing one of many hats around the house. Literally. We have a lot of hats here. I've got two small boys, so these include cowboy hats, knight's helmets, pirate hats, superhero masks (kind of a hat, right??), and fireman hats, among others. My personal favorite is the coonskin cap with the raccoon tail hanging down the back.

When I'm wearing the writer hat (which is a huge white bonnet festooned with purple ribbons and flowers... okay, not really. But that would be cool), I'm usually trying to work my love of travel, wine, and history into a romance that readers will enjoy.

I'm represented by Nalini Akolekar of Spencerhill Associates.

I hope you enjoy my books, and I'd love to hear from you!

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