#so universe hey make it happen
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A belief in Nominative Determinsim
#mira & isa sitting at the other side of the room: oh that cannot be a healthy rationalisation. someone should deconstruct that QUICKLY...#change's strongest soldiers VERSUS one guy echo chambering themselves about a susperstition-based retributive model of the world. GO!!!#isat spoilers#isat#isat fanart#isat siffrin#isat loop#sifloop#sloops#in stars and time#in stars and time fanart#lucabyteart#hey look now. this is softer than usual isnt it? ignore the. ignore the subtle damnation of blame unto the self. its fine. theyre fine#this is in fact a slight adaptation of that headcanon of mine i linked! yep! turns out the way to comic-ise it was to. make it like#90% speech bubble and get kinda weird with the formatting. it's clunky and experimental but hey. im experimenting.#the next ones gonna have even more fucking speech bubbles if it goes how im planning. christ#then its gonna get followed up with something wordless so. all things in perfect balance.#DISCLAIMER: i like to write loop and siffrin displaying the maybe not so great logic-holes their seeming fear of 'retribution for not#sticking to (the script) what the universe intends for them' entails. i do not agree with their weird philosophising.#i in fact think this is . bad for them. and am exploring how fucking unhealthy their mindset seems to be even when 'mundane'#OCD siffrin real as hell whats with the doing arbitrary actions in specific ways lest Something Nebulously Bad Happen little dude?#anyway if you caught the extremely blunt symbolism of kissing a hand with a knife in it you win a prize! it's called self-satisfaction 🎉🎉#hmm. do people realise i kept calling this type of back and forth between siffrin and loop a socratic dialogue bc socrates was also just#arguing with himself? like he was just making up the other guys. complete thought experiment. i also call them that because theyre WORDY!!!
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i posted abt this on my tiktok story but i need to rant more so im putting it here 😭😭 the way a lot of mikosai shippers (on tiktok, pinterest, reddit, etc) are is such a big reminder to me of why i hate the strictly romantic soulmates trope with every fiber of my being 😭😭😭 people who interpret soulmates as "that means theyre canonically together" regardless of how the characters actually feel about each other and if they ACTUALLY get together is so fucking gross to me oh my god its so fucking gross i hate forced romance so bad 😭😭 someone cant just say "hey, we're soulmates so you HAVE to date me and its literally weird and impossible for you to like anyone else because i said so!!" and also aiura WOULDNT do that anyway ???? HELLOOO???
you have no idea how many people ive seen call all saiki ships with anyone other than aiura "problematic ships" just because "theyre soulmates"
#SOULMATES DOES NOT MAKE A COUPLE CANON <333#'she SAID theyre soulmates so that means hes HERS now and its gross for u to think he liked anyone else'#hey thats actually... really bad!! hey she actually cant and wouldnt force him to date her!!! hey what the fuck!!!#not a mikosai hate post#only weird forced romance likers hate post <3#if someone doesnt like someone then they dont like them... them being soulmates doesnt change that...#thats actually just not how it works and the idea that that WOULD be how it works is gross#and a lot of the fics ive read of them end up with aiura being all 'ha i told you so! i knew id break u eventually!'#'i knew id get to u if i just kept calling u my boyfriend without permission and saying we're soulmates!'#which like not only would she not do that... its also just really gross#like u really thought 'he doesnt like her so she wears him down and doesnt leave him alone until he relents' and like... u went with that?#oh...#weird...#idk maybe im crazy and also im having a hard time phrasing any of this#but it just brings up so many consent issues and it makes me really uncomfortable#like according to THOSE shippers it wouldnt be by his own will or feelings if he eventually fell in love with her#it would just be because the universe said so and he never had any choice#mikosai is so cute when u think of it in like the totally opposite way#in MY opinion i love mikosai AFTER aiura accepts that soulmates doesnt mean he HAS to date her#that HAS to happen before they date and THEN theyre really cute#saiki k#tdlosk#the disastrous life of saiki k.#meows post
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I went into bg3 fully ready to have a good time and have done so despite many ways in which the game is not good and have not worried too much over various dramas about patch changes but my chill streak has finally ended and I am wailing gnashing my teeth etc. about patch 7 (the supposedly final one with story/content changes) not adding companion reactivity for any of the durge content in act 2
#gotta regain my chill about this. it doesn't change the good version of bg3 that exists in my head#but like. durge is literally the protagonist character. and a huge chunk of story is just bizarrely missing from act two#all the baddies recognize you and no one reacts#warden says you were an important guest no one reacts#kressa says she had a great time torturing you for weeks no one reacts#and it's so misaligned with companion reactivity for everything else. like#I am one of those players who goes around the camp circle talking to every single companion after anything even mildly important happens#to hear the couple of lines of dialogue they have about it#because they've got a couple of lines of dialogue about every plot development and significant moment in other companion storylines!#but they don't have a single word for enormous central plotline revelations about the player character#it makes the act 3 reactions bizarre too because everyone's shocked by what gortash says and it's like#literally everyone in moonrise was like 'oh hey it's you again' what did you THINK 😭#a lot of people complain about the resist!durge final scene after killing orin being lackluster#and yeah sure I feel it's lacking in a few ways but like. at least it exists.#a cutscene does play and afterwards the companions do react. ymmv on whether those reactions are impactful or fitting#but they do--crucially--exist#whereas in act 2 there is straight up nothing#when people say right in front of the companions 'hello fellow villain fancy seeing you back here again'#there is not even so much as a 'dude are you okay' after kressa talks about keeping durge prisoner and torturing them#okay okay it's fine I'm getting it out of my system I'm gonna be normal about this again#the companions had reactions in the good version that exists in my head 😔#scribblingface plays bg3#okay actually also like larian has made so many changes based on fans complaining a lot about something#often changes that made the complaining people happy but pissed off everyone who already liked the current version#not weighing in on the merit of various specifics but it has struck me as a sometimes odd and unwise degree of#listening to what the players want. like just tell your story and accept that some parts won't please everyone#but THIS THING is universally agreed on by every durge player#because it's not something 'wrong' it's something completely absent that should have been there in order to align with the rest of the game#and yet. we don't get this change in the final update.
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This has been a long day. But I am on my way back. Other Alfred told me what needs to be done.
#cassandra cain rp#cass comments#cassii dimension saga#(ooc: I haven't been posting much due to just being busy tbh but then I figured hey why not make a lore reason#so I'm gonna say there's some time shenanigans happening due to being in another universe and for Cass it's still the same day she arrived#and she's bringing back a piece of that Gotham that holds some significance to Cassii.#i was thinking a rock or mineral or something but cassmeifyoucan should probably be the one to decide what it is#anyway yeah she's on her way to the portal now. How long will that take in her home universe? ¯\_(ツ)_/¯#sorry for the wall of text)
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okay so i could write a very long essay on what i like and dislike about the dark phoenix movie but the tldr is that while i end up pausing the older films so i can let out my excitement about them i end up pausing this one so i can let out my rage
#el talks#seriously the only reason why the timeline got fucked with was so they could in-universe retcon the events of last stand so why the FUCK#did they then go and make this film anyway#new timeline charles - who knows exactly what his counterpart did and what it led to - would not have been this stubborn about fucking up#i can buy that he would've edited her memories! he'd have seen it as better than what his counterpart did before#but the moment it went wrong he would've ALREADY KNOWN where it could lead. he fucked up! he knows it! why is he acting like he was right!#HE ALREADY KNOWS HE'S NOT HE SAW THE OTHER FUTURE HE KNOWS WHAT HAPPENED THERE#but hey if you're here for jean/scott then this film is about all you get. at least she doesn't kill him this time#every single one of these characters deserves better than this#in all her scenes it's so deeply obvious that jennifer lawrence does NOT want to be there. and she's right
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hehe. crackling
#just me hi#hey do your ears crackle and get kind of uncomfortable when people yell lol#sometimes regular loud noises do it but not really#it started happening like a year or so ago and blahh hfh#and then like a chill goes down from my ears to the back of my neck ? it's weird man#do i probably know why that is? yea lmao. do i wanna speculate anyway? Yes it's fun ehehehehegh :33#the fairies dropped some dust on my bed during one visit and now it makes my ears itchy on the inside i guess#the ocean is whispering but reception is poor#old tissue paper from some birthday some years ago is still hangin around#tv static lives in my head and goes for walks sometimes :)#the characters stored inside are opening their packages#Thought Blender 3000 (Guaranteed Blending (Max Puree)) has been invoked#my neurons are playing musical chairs#brain is doin a little jig#the possibilities... Endless.........#//anywhoooo i have GOT to write#not because i have to but because i Need to. you understand#so i'm going to see which part of the universe will decide No. Not Now when i start hbvfhs :3#let's seee#ofc i'm going to reblog a handful of things beforehand though. it's just the way things are done lol :33#toooooodles :>>
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I think at this point, I just need to accept that if I accidentally lean into a canon idea that I didn't know/forgot was canon at the time but still found it amusing enough to use in my own work, it's safe to say I'm a good writer who understands this universe and the characters in it
#Hayley Speaks#Anyway my friend was talking about Lost Legends yesterday#And how Pacifica accuses Dipper of wanting to make out with aliens#I was just looking over at my alien kiddo Dev like 'This is why they're best friends'#(Yes I'm sure Pacifica was joking but that's an in-universe line that I just completely forgot about)#(And YET now I can tie it into the stuff I've already come up with!)#This keeps happening to me so I'm starting to think hey! Maybe that means I'm a good writer! :D
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I think in a Pokémon au William and Henry wouldn't be trainers at all (at least at the start of the story) n be more like non-trainers or low level characters who just have 1 or 2
#on a pokemon kick my apologies#normally i love connecting every character possible to a legendary but i think its funnier if theyre doing all their normal crimes in the#pokemon universe without a legendary whatsoever#everythings the exact same but william has a buneary and azumarill now#do you think William could have a mimikyu. i think i could force it to work#it represents his jealousy#hmm. his need to be better too. based on the anime#so like what happens when you die for 30 years and come back as a ghost. all his pokemon are gone no doubt#hey how good of a typing is ghost/steel#dark/steel? ghost/dark? fairy is so hard to explain. maybe it could represent remnant. heyyy ghost/fairy just like mimikyu-#thats crazy hows that happen . wild how that fits so perfectly for springtrap and is also the same type as mimikyu#(i am blatantly making things up and forcing connections because mimikyu is my favorite)
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I have such. a difficult time trying to actually make my aa inserts because I have this brain disease called 'everything has to be realistic' and I'm not actually that creative, so something like aa where things are just a little batshit and continue to do so, i am at a complete loss at making characters who are simultaneously universe-appropriate, abide by the laws of absurdity, and also appease my logical brain
#like. aa is funny. theres terrible shit that happens ofc but its always offset by rule of funny.#like the universe does NOT have laws set in it that i can abide by#its mostly just hey is this a pun or how would this character fit set-lore wise#and then you can go insane. like making a ghost a witness to a crime or cross examining a parrot#also i have like no legal experience so blehh. i do work for the city though womp womp#i guess i could make my new insert a librarian. my older one is a private investigator and master of disguise#no elaboration on charon cole until i get a backbone tho. or replay the pw games#meanwhile. hello new insert.#when i inevitably continue playin tgaa i will make another insert. & when i play the investigations collection i get to work on charon more#I GUESS. whatever. dont look at me.#val.txt
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for months now i have had this little story idea bouncing around in my head for an AU of Jetpack Joyride where Barry is stuck inside a big expermental time loop conducted by Legitimate Research to create an army of randomly selected time-travelling soldiers. the idea is very much still rough and i dunno if and when i'll develop it into a bigger thing, but it's a pretty cool idea and it's a twist on the JJ game that i've never really seen much exploration on.
basically, it focuses on Barry, who is the sort of Patient Zero of an experimental concentrated time-fuckery technology LR is working on. every single day, at exactly the same time, Barry goes out to work his salesman job, discovers the jetpack, breaks into the laboratory, takes it for a joyride, eventually gets hit by an obstacle and dies. the next day, Barry goes out to work his salesman job, discovers the jetpack, breaks into the lab, takes it for a joyride and dies. and he does the same exact thing the next day, and the next day, and the next day, and the next day... he's pretty much stuck in a loop of the exact same events happening repeatedly every single day, and he has absolutely no idea about it. that is, until there's a glitch in the system, and Barry progressively becomes a lot more suspicious and paranoid about the situation he's in. the rest of this post is gonna be REALLY spoilery (like i literally just explain big important chunks of the story for several paragraphs) if i ever make this into a full-fledged fanfic, so i'm gonna put it under a keep reading thingy. also it is... quite long and convoluted lol.
as the story goes on, it focuses more on the mental degredation of Barry as he starts uncovering all these weird clues, slowly trying to piece together what's going on and driving himself insane, because every time a reset occurs, his memory of the previous loop ever happening is completely wiped and everything he did that day goes all the way back to square one. since the malfunctioning of LR's technology though, Barry has been getting little nuggets of deja vu and half-remembered fragments of dying before a reset. this eventually becomes him repeating things to himself, little phrases and codes over and over and over in hopes that it will persist into the next reset. this eventually becomes symbols stuck up on the walls of his room and then progresses to entire rituals to help him remember and little behaviourisms like tics and stims to let him know he's in another loop. he becomes more and more panicked and unsettled, paranoid that someone - or something - is watching him closely. additionally, he keeps having disturbing dreams in the early hours of the morning before he gets up to go to work, ones that are symbolic and prophetic, as if they're trying to warn him about something. i've had concepts of him waking up on top of a pile of millions of mangled carcasses that all look exactly like Barry, and having on them them forcefully grab onto his leg and pull him down with the rest of them. it's kinda like the nightmare Woody has in Toy Story 2, but like, dead guys everywhere, lol.
the backstory of this whole thing is kinda insane. basically, Legitimate Research is a sketchy government funded facility that's doing secret time experiments to create the strongest beings for a purpose that's somewhat similar to Brains' Zomb Bomb plan from AOZ (i haven't fully decided yet). Barry is someone who has been randomly selected for their newest version of the concentrated time loop experiment, where patients will be put under looping tests to extract data about their strength, agility and performance and decide what they need to supplement them with in order to create the perfect soldier.
Barry was 22 years old when he was selected. he was actually a relatively normal local Fish N' Chips vendor living in New South Wales, but one day, when he recieved an exciting letter in the mail about a new ambitious job opportunity, he completely disappeared without a trace and seemed to have been entirely erased from the minds of everyone he had ever known. Barry had actually been kidnapped and ensnared into a mind-experiments facility of the laboratory, where they proceeded to wipe his mind, proof of his existence and his entire personhood up to this point, and replaced all of it with fake memories to fill in the gaps. he was then placed in stasis and to be injected with high doses of strength drugs as they crafted a new life for him behind the scenes. a new house, in a new state, all with new stories and memorabilia meant to be lived out by new person. now, he was Barry Steakfries in Queensland, a rough-around-the-edges guy with a passion for action movies and destruction. he was a revel with a thirst for chaos and freedom, but he just didn't have the means to achieve it yet. it was all according to plan.
a big part of the story i want to tell that involves him is that at some point, Barry tries to break free from the time loop by doing something different. this takes a lot of pre-planning, memory rituals and repeating details to himself, but after he wakes up from a reset and gets out of bed, he hesitates, choosing to go to a different place to sell his gramophones that day. he deliberately tries his best to avoid Legitimate Research's headquarters as much as he can, and while he doesn't completely remember why he's doing it, he has a deep gut feeling that he should stay away from them at all costs. so he does. and at first, it goes well. the day is different, his choices seem to actually matter and for once, the feeling of deja vu isn't tearing him apart... until a crazy freak accident happens that forces Barry to die and reset the time loop again, wiping away everything he had done that day. Legitimate Research is now forcefully trying to stop him from knowing what the hell is going on by forcing him to die with each now discovery he makes, and Barry has to figure out more and more creative solutions to averting their surveillance and trying to get the hell out of the loop.
Craig will also be involved with the story too!! i'm not exactly sure what exactly the events leading up to Barry discovering and meeting him would be, but it'd be kinda halfway-late-ish into the story where Barry manages to cut off LR's surveillance of him, breaks into the laboratory and searches through its archives for anything relating to time. during this raid, he accidentally discovers the true Patient Zero to this time experiment: a broken, decrepit shell of a man who has been hooked up to a set of wires and locked away deep into the laboratory, never meant to be discovered by anyone, only known simply as #000 'Craig'. Craig was the very first human they used to run an early prototype of these experiments, but through malfunctions in the threads of LR's technology, he ended up knowing too much and tried to break free from his time loop, which resulted in him being dragged out of reality and becoming completely detached from his own time, stopping his aging process completely and practically allowing him to exist forever and persistently through every reset unaffected. LR relocated him and considered him a catastrophic failure, locking him away in a cell deep in the bowels of the laboratory before destroying and erasing every archive of him ever having existed in any point in time. and now, the same thing is about to happen to Barry if he doesn't figure out a way to stop what's happening quickly. Barry, outisde of LR, is the only one who is aware of Craig's existence in this timeline. Barry makes a vow to make sure that he will never ever forget Craig, no matter what happens to him, no matter how many times his timeline gets reset, because he is the only other person on the whole world who truly understands what he's going through.
at the very end of the story, when Barry finally escapes the time loop and is about to enter into a new reality where none of this ever happened, he reaches out a hand to Craig and offers he come with him to live. Craig, however, rejects the offer, sadly confessing to Barry that because of his disconect from the threads of time progression itself, Craig must stay behind and be erased along with everything inside this one and let Barry live his life. Barry protests, insisting that his life wouldn't be complete without him and that they've already gone through so much together, but Craig assures him that this is the best for the both of them, and that Barry must leave him soon before the window to escape closes. Barry gives Craig once last goodbye, holding him close and basking in his presence for the final time. he closes his eyes, presses his head against Craig's and whispers "I promise I'll never forget you." before he slowly lets him go, not breaking their locked gaze on each other for even a second as he steps into the portal and ventures into an entirely new reality, never to return.
i want there to be an epilogue part where Barry starts his new life and goes looking for a place to stay, and he comes across the place where LR used to be, which is instead occupied with a big square fence plot and a sign that says "UNDER CONSTRUCTION: NEW RESTAURANT TO BE BUILT". Barry stares at it for a moment and reflects on everything that has happened. all the hellish experiments that were once held inside this very plot of land, all the trauma he went through to get to this point, Craig's sacrifice, everything has lead up to him standing here, in the right place, at the right time, to finally live the life he should've had to begin with. eventually, he turns away, continuing to walk down the street. he should go check that place out sometime.
(insert "what a fucked up dream for a baby to have" ending from 'then what' here)
#barry steakfries#jetpack joyride#fanfic idea#alternate universe#this is really just an idea dump post. y'know just throwing eggs everywhere and hoping one sticks to something#also i like how every au idea i've had for jetpack joyride always involves a deep queer-coded relationship between barry and craig#the aoz total apocalypse au has them go through hell together and become closer bfs who would die for each other as a result#the timeloop au has barry and craig destined to find each other but are separated from each others' timelines and must eventually let go-#-of their bond with each other and have barry sacrifice the existence of craig so he can go on and live a normal life without him#the toni/revenge au is literally just barry and craig/toni having a messy breakup ffs lmaooo#every au i'm making for this game is so unequivocally gay and i love that#we got the 'i'd kill for u' gay. we got the tragic destiny love story gay. we got the bad blood by taylor swift gay. it's all here#now that i think about it the relationship that barry and craig have in timeloop kinda reminds me of kirk and spock always being destined-#-to find each other across space and time.....#i will make sure every au i make deliberately goes out of its way to have something so very gay in it and you can trust my word on that#i wanna draw all three of my au barrys at group therapy with each other sharing their traumas#and canon barry is just there looking at them like ''what the fuck happened to you people....'' lmaoo#toni/revenge au barry: my bf turned evil and broke up with me...#timeloop barry: my bf literally got erased from existence for me...#total apocalypse barry: .... my bf is a hardened professional zombie hunter. wtf is happening in your universes???#canon barry: *taking a slow sip of coffee with an extremely concerned look on his face*#anyway yeah. barry is stuck inside a timeloop and that's why jj always starts the same way after you die#not even kidding this whole au was spawned from me playing the game again in late 2022 and thinking ''hey isn't it interesting-#-how barry always dies at the end but then bursts through the wall again just fine when you start again? like a loop? hmmm''#i'm gonna sleep now. it is. 11 pm and i have been writing this for god knows how long. good night snoorrrkk mimimimj
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you know there's a real missed opportunity of not making versions of like the real housewives franchise in comics. you look me in the eyes and you goddamned tell me that the real housewives of gotham or central city doesn't fucking SMACK in the dc universe and give atlanta and rhony a run for the crown
#kazoo noises#superhero posting#dc#can YOU IMAGINE how good real housewives of gotham would be? my GOD#better tv than early rhonj! i am so serious that shit would be REVOLUTIONARY!!!! oh the reality tv scholars in superhero universes are#SICK. like. play with me in this space guys. please. gotham is famously corrupt and chockablock of villains and the only good wealthy perso#is basically wayne and affiliates. who despite waynes freewheeling pretty boy idle rich energy is not reality tv trashy (SOMEHOW)#why isnt he on the show? isnt he with a new gal every month? ''guess he never gets passed to the housewife crowd''#one of the season plotlines involves a messy divorce a disgraced mayor and like idk *spins wheel* city comptroller of gotham that happened#during a local election year and the city gathers together for the inside scoop in between this poor fuckin rich lady who while kinda..#sketch (real housewives vibes truly) is still sympathetic and raked over the coals by national media and HEY THATS ONE OF OUR FREAKS! who#has a home renovation. a divorce. her kids! and is really trying the poor gal. crazy season. theres still another plotline#and you KNOW central city breeds folks weird. like gotham has the sketchiness and the weirdness. central city is kitsch#central citys housewives are all balls to the wall wild. theres the workin ladies and the vaguely old money ladies and They Dislike Each#Other but u know they'll circle them wagons when an out of towner gets involved (this is me projecting bc i view central city as superhero#stl) do you think someone ever gets wrapped up in a supervillain plot? just this housewife and the camera guy for bravo out shopping and OH#FUCK! ITS CAPTAIN COLD! and now we got a hostage situation#and you knooooow that whichever speedster comes to save the day is making small talk during the rescue. you just know it.#bet that episode of housewives won an emmy tbh. theres like five different phd dissertations on it. in an oral history of the franchise#someone does fucking bag an interview with the flash about the Captain Cold Episode. its the most peaceful fucking reunion andy ever hosts#dont ask about my opinions about drag scenes in comics im worse about that
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@beatingheart-bride
"Maybe..." Randall murmured, still perplexed by Renfield's reaction-all the time he'd known the little guy, he'd been friendly to everyone, even people who didn't like him. Minnie constantly scooted him and the other strays away, but Renfield adamantly rubbed up against her legs when she was out on the sidewalk, undeterred by her dislike for him. So for him to just randomly get all worked up about someone he'd never met before was just...odd.
Still, he tried to brush it off-he also didn't miss the way Emily put on a smile and tried to laugh it off, a part of his heart sensing she was a little hurt by this response. Hoping to make her feel better about it, he said, "I'm sure he's just having an off day; don't take it too personally. I've had cats crawl all over me one day and want nothing to do with me the next, it's just how they are. Renny will probably be back later-maybe he'll be in a better mood by then."
"Since when did you get two lunchbreaks, Randy?"
"Just having a little something extra, Dave," Randall groaned, pausing to grab a napkin as he finished his sandwich, just as one of his coworkers had come downstairs for a smoke break-Dave was one of the more irritating coworkers he had to put up with on a daily basis; he insisted he was just an easy-going guy who liked a good joke, but his jokes were often hurtful and very seldom funny. Considering his idea of comedy was calling Randall "Randy" (which he had never gone by, even as a boy, and couldn't hardly stand as a nickname), it told him a lot about Dave's sense of humor (or lack thereof).
"And can I help you find anything, beautiful?" Dave asked, having noticed Emily and put on a smile, leaning up against the counter, his cigarette tucked behind his ear. "Maybe a date for Friday night? Pretty flower like you shouldn't have to hang out with a real weed like ol' Randy here."
#((very glad to hear that; very glad to hear they were understanding; and that you've got some time off!))#((and honestly; randall and emily's love for one another is downright indestructible!))#((across all these rp's; all these au's; all these different timelines and universes))#((where they've found each other in different ways; one or the other has been a supernatural being))#((and that hasn't stopped their love for one another at all! the revelation that emily is a vampire))#((will be no different! you're right! emily lost him once; she's not gonna lose him again!))#((randall himself will do his best to make sure of that!))#((and good question-maybe they'll come slowly at first; but maybe something will happen))#((that triggers a rush of them back for him?))#((and hey; count me in with the nerdy names for cats too! i've always named cats nerdy things))#((even the stray ones that hang around my neck of the woods-a new one just popped up a little while back))#((he's very skittish and has black markings around his face like a mask; so i've named him erique!))#((so i'm defidently just as much a nerd as you *and* randall!))#outofhatboxes#beatingheart-bride#V:Dark Shadows
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@mondscheinprinzessin
LAURA LAURA LAURA
.... I might need to revise my meme. I haven't even slept yet but all this song makes me want to do is... idk, get better? Rob a bank and be able to pay for therapy and go get better? Get better and go to their concert and dance and sing along to the "oh damn it will get better even if I have to claw my way to it with my bare hands" song?
#what is happening. i haven't slept yet and I'm overwhelmed with university and other stuff and mental health and whatnot#and still laura's buam are not making me cry but actually.... give me a vague sense of oh damn yeah it can get better and on god it WILL#even if i have to claw my way to it#hold on that might just be a quote from a tv show. which one was it. a woman saying it to someone about someone else#uuuuuuuh#oh. shadow of bones; nina saying she'll claw her way to a happy end if she has to#damn laura your boys are not making me cry when i'm tired what is happening#tell them to keep it up#how do i rework that meme now#well not now. now i need to get back to that goddamn stupid paper and somehow find 1600 more words to bullshit in#but in the evening today maybe#not like i should write another paper then that's also already overdue but hey. we know me by now#mine#lauras buam#lonely spring#sad weather kids#the line i wasn't ready for a line that is so challenging still stabs me though#i would once again like to have the energy and time to try to draw something. not sure what with that line but. something.#brudi i'm doing worse every day how is this not making me cry but actually making me happy wth is happening#is this like when pets get a last burst of energy and love before they die? am i about to crash really badly as soon as i've handed in my#papers?#yeah yeah i'd say sorry for the tag rambling but it's my tags and we know by now i'm not capable of shutting the fuck up
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it's okay guys we just have to get through thursday and friday we're good
#and also hobie brown exists#hey rant warning#more like feverish mumbling#i had such a stressful and annoying day today#everybody say fuck robert from the marketing department👍👍#uahwghhhh im just tired#gotta wash my hair and i just ate some pizza its good#i have to be seriously thinking abt what im doing abt my masters#im so ducking stressed#do i do it on the side and work in the meantime <-would have to find a new job in the city i might move to. i have no portfolio nothing#do i go into it fully and not work <-i could be making money by im not. not that im in desperate need it would just be very nice to#be building a stash yknow#dude holy fuck what do i do#also if i were to move and change my job would i try to keep the current one until i find another or do i just drop it end of sept#like i planned#oh and also!!!! do i go and do a masters in programming which will probably give me a more universal chance of employment in IT#or do i go into gamedev whoch would be more up my alley i think but i also think would limit my chances in the general market outside gamed#if i did just programming i could take some gamedev courses on top#but god fucking knkws i wont unless thereatened with a knife thats just not gonna happen#and also i will be miserable the whole way through in programming bc i assume its just gonna be 2 more years of what i did for bachelors#while im hoping gamedev would be kinder to me but have no realistic way of knowing since we only had one class in game making for bachelors#i did like it though (as opposed to literally everything else past the first 2 lectures)#also im passionate abt games and gamedev (as in i love to look at it amd listen abt it. not that im deeply in love with doing gamedev and#This unsure still. like i like it from the outside. v much. havent had the chance to say for sure whether i love it from the actual doing p#rspective#also besides all that i need to buy an outfit for a wedding thats like 3 weeks away <-may be alot but not to me and not for buying clothes#and also also a persons hitting on me over dc and theyre getting me overwhelmed (i dont mind it mostly. i just think its pointless and they#e not getting the hint)#im so confused like how do u hit on a person literally the only thing u know abt is that theyre gay and youve exchanged like. 70 words tota#dude im in a fever dream
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it would be nice if actually NMH4 was smart and pulled a whole 'actually the real villain was inter-generational trauma all along!' and that it re-contextualised the overarching narrative of NMH to be about the about the Touchdown Family's struggle to end the toxic cycle of violence that their family has been stuck in.
#I DOUBT NMH4 will be that smart. (assuming it will ever happen) but it would be neat if they did lean into that#the reason why the ending of the cycle is so important is that it kinda adds a nice book end / call back to alice twilight#the whole ‘free us from the red crimson sea of madness!’ as a cry for help by assassins asking Travis to help them leave the life#of being an assassin still kinda gets to me#I mean the whole reason why NMH2 happens is that many of the characters are there BECAUSE of Travis. many envy him because he was the one#that became number one. AND WALKED AWAY.#plus in NMH2 travis says ‘we may be fucked up but assassins are human too’ and GAH HES SO RIGHT ABOUT THAT#like really one thing that does bother me about flesh and blood episode is that Travis is VERY NONCHALANT about killing henry. like hey.#that’s your brother who literally just told you not long ago that he saved you and (their) sister jeane from their father!!!#like?? wouldn’t you have a mental breakdown about that revelation?! like I get human emotions are complex#but like at least SOME FORM OF REMORSE WOULDVE MADE THE SCENE BETTER. even him perhaps scolding Sylvia for being nonchalant about the death#of Henry would have made the situation go from ‘oh god the horror’ to ‘don’t you dare say that about my brother#’he did everything to keep me and my sister safe and you have the audacity to think I was okay with killing him?!’#like seriously where did that small bit of familial bonding/friendship development with Henry and Travis go after NMH2?????#like Henry didn’t just save Travis in the Nick of time with the jasper batt jr fight for NOTHING.#Travis failed to save jeane! so make him at least try to help Henry!! he’s his only real blood relative and knowing the person who’s done#their best to keep you out of very specific life threatening danger - I think you owe your sibling to try and save them from whatever#is happening to them that’s making them take irrational decisions of world domination#SUDA HIRE ME TO BE YOUR WRITER TRUST ME I CAN FIX YOUR SILLY LITTLE UNIVERSE I SWEAR#nomoreposting#suda51posting#nmh3 spoilers#shallow rambles#sorry I’m have deep thoughts about this series and it’s implications sorry#yeah I’m kinda in denial of the whole Henry’s domination of the world thing (not that I hate it!! good for him!!)#but also I wish there was much more build up and development before hand you know? the last time we got development was in NMH2#<- NMH2 was released… 13 years ago and even then henry still doesn’t have that much screentime either so is that even character development#if you’re reading tags. dear goodness thank you for putting up with my ramblings. /GEN
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sometimes a character isn’t secretive they just have like so many secrets y’know?
#Snow#Universe Ends Posts#sometimes! a character deflects and lies constantly but that is not indicative of anything#dfgdfg i don't know how to describe it. its like. like if you went up to Snow and went 'hey you like yellow right?'#she'd be like Yeah I Do :)#and also if you went up to Snow and went 'youve lied and deflected about x and y and its actually z right?'#she'd be like Yeah It Is :)#sometimes you just gotta work past the lies and deflections and persona and also a character is totally open and honest#it. it makes sense in my head.#bc i also play characters who ARE secretive and would rather die than share One Single Fact about themselves#and i also play characters who are very open and will answer any question honestly on the spot without hesitation#and Snow just so happens to be. like. somewhere. in the middle. kind of. and she's very normal#that's the most important thing here actually Snow is SO normal
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