#so true sellout queen <3

[crjupdates]

carlyraejepsen: “Hooray, yippee, buttons and bows…” 🎀 @/hellokitty is making her 3D debut and I’m singing her new theme song!! Yes indeed.

You can watch Hello Kitty: Super Style! streaming now with @/amazonkids in the U.S., Canada, UK, and Japan @/sanrio #ad

Listen to Carly sing the theme song here!

[clefairymuke]

oiiii i have a request for a oneshot or maybe something fun to add to your regrets fic (whatever you find better) I think it would be funny a reader x the scouts drunk and levi finding them and being all cute taking care of reader :3

thank you for this request!! sorry for how long it took, but it managed to pull me out of some writers block that’s been kicking my ass lately. thank you for suggesting it and reading!

as always, much love! <3

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Red Wine | Levi x Reader

pairing: levi x reader

themes: fluff

tw: swearing, alcohol use

word count: 2511

True fun and relaxation is not something you typically experience.

Of course, when you signed up for this whole Scout Regiment thing, you weren’t expecting nights out in bars and plush queen-sized beds with wool blankets. You expected exactly what you got: exhausting days and mostly sleepless nights, demanding grief and waking nightmares. One thing you hadn’t expected, however, was how stale it would get. These thoughts are why you ended up where you are now: propped lazily against a wall surrounded by your friends, loud laughs bubbling freely from your ever-smiling mouth, and a bottle of wine in hand.

While the “why” is clear to you, the “how” is a bit more cloudy. Around the complete euphoria in your head stands a thick fog blocking your memory — that, or the fact that your drunkenly dwindling attention span can no longer support a thought lasting more than a second or two. All you know is that you’re here now, and you’re having the time of your life. Your eyes and ears skirt past Eren and Jean arguing without stopping to listen in as you pass the bottle to Mikasa.

For once, you aren’t thinking about how Levi could make this experience better. Although you love being in the company of your boyfriend, you can’t help but imagine his disdain if he were to witness your situation. You can almost feel the ferocity of his razor sharp-glare creeping up your spine as you picture it within your mind.

You lay your head back on the concrete wall that keeps you upright and close your eyes. Although you had shown to be quite social when the bottle first began to be passed, you now wanted nothing more than to take a nice nap — or to go vomit just to ease yourself of the queasy feeling that was overtaking your stomach. Either would suffice. You listen to your friends chatting mindlessly around you, their care to be inconspicuous slipping away with the wine. You watch Connie drain what was left in the bottle, leaving you to curse at the fact that you would be stuck in the uncomfortable kind of drunk that left you a bit nauseous while still conscious enough to be prone to anxiety.

You sit there in a dizzy oblivion for what could have been five minutes or fifty, tuning out the antics of the rest of the people in the room as they laugh and roughhouse. Your stomach stirs and turns, but your mind begins to clear: you notice Connie and Sasha choreographing a dance routine to music only they could hear; Mikasa and Armin sit quietly chatting behind Eren as he and Jean argue over who is more adept at fighting; Ymir and Christa are making googly eyes at each other over their giggles.

“Hey, guys?” you say, your brain lagging behind your mouth by at least a few seconds. “I’m probably about to throw up.” You quickly discover that you’re right, as your gut begins to bubble and your mouth begins to water.

“Oh, fuck,” Connie mumbles as he looks around the room desperately. Sasha looks disappointed as he stops dancing and approaches where you sit against the wall, gripping your wrists in his hands and helping you to your feet; with both of you being drunk enough to show it, stumbles are surely present. Time skips, and you’re kneeled in front of the toilet, Connie leaving to give you privacy — you’re decidedly much drunker than you thought you were.

Just as you start to vomit, you hear Eren defeatedly say, “Oh, fuck me.” That can’t be good.

The space goes silent save your groans. The most imaginative depths of your brain think that perhaps a titan is looking in the window, waiting to bring you all to your doom. How convenient for half of the newest scout recruits to be intoxicated and defenseless. When you hear Levi’s voice say, “Stupid fucking brats. Where is she?” you wish it were a titan instead.

A chorus of voices answer, “Bathroom.” What a bunch of fucking sellouts, you think to yourself. Your heartbeat begins to pound in your throat again as you hear his footsteps grow near; when he taps at the door a few times, you let it all out — out of fear or simple drunkenness you are unsure. “God damn it,” you hear him mumble before the door handle turns and his hands find your hair, pulling it back into a makeshift ponytail.

He rubs your back in a manner you can only describe as passive-aggressive. You can tell he wants to scold you — and you’re definitely in for it once you get to feeling better — but you can also tell that he wants to care for you. That’s why you try to pretend not to hear his curses as he lectures you on responsibility.

“Why the hell are you drinking with these idiots? I wouldn’t be mad if it was a glass or two, but there are three empty bottles on the floor in there. Three. No wonder you’re puking your fucking guts up,” he mutters, voice low enough for only you to hear despite his angry tone.

You feel your eyes watering as your stomach settles for another brief moment. “Levi,” you say, your breathing labored, “now is not the time.” You hear him scoff before you begin to dry heave, his hand moving a bit more caring across your back as he holds onto your hair. Your gut starts to feel a bit better as your brain realizes there’s nothing left. He places his hands under your arms and lifts you gently to your feet before flushing the toilet. You stumble awkwardly to his lead as he escorts you to the sink.

He reaches around you to turn on the water, which is cold to the touch as he holds your hand beneath it. “Clean your mouth out,” he says, nudging his hand around yours until you form a cup. “It’s disgusting.” You oblige him, lifting it to your lips. You feel it drip down your chin as you swish it around between your teeth, looking up in the mirror to see your blushing cheeks and droopy eyes. Levi stands behind you, dressed in no more than a grey t-shirt and some comfortable-looking pants. His hair is neat and combed, which doesn’t quite match the rest of his attire, but you aren’t complaining. He looks as ethereal as always. After you spit, he grabs your shoulder and spins you around to face him.

“You okay?” he asks, brushing the tears that had formed on your face away with his thumbs. You shake your head at him, your eyes trailing down to the ground. Here comes the scolding.

He sweeps you off your feet, to your surprise, holding you bridal-style as he carries you out of the bathroom. You lay your head against his shoulder, seeing the walls of the room and the faces of your friends go blurrily by as he strides to the door; they all look terrified.

“Laps,” you hear Levi announce to your friends, his voice icy. “At dawn. I don’t give a shit if you’re hungover.”

A chorus of groans is the soundtrack for your exit as the door slams shut. The walk back to Levi’s suite is spotty at best; you’re unsure of exactly how long it’s taking. The scenery around you feels more dreamlike than anything — you find yourself hoping that you’re still propped against the wall with your friends, sleeping soundly and dreaming of Levi catching you red-handed. When time jumps and he’s laying you down on his couch, you’re pretty sure you’re awake.

You hear rustling around as you lay there, still half waiting for a scolding. He rejoins you rather quickly, setting some things down on the side table and gently lifting your head. He sits, letting you back down slowly to lay in his lap. “I brought you bread,” he says, taking it from the table and placing it in your hands. “It’ll soak up the alcohol. There’s water over here when you need it.” You inspect the bread lazily before nibbling on it. The very idea of chewing something and swallowing it is enough to make you nauseous, but you trust his judgement.

You feel his hand fall atop your forehead and his fingers draw circles in your hair. You don’t fight the grin threatening your lips. “Are you okay, my love?” he asks, his voice soft. This is the tenderness you had fallen in love with many months ago; the one thing your friends are blind to. He carries himself with such coldness for the public — he is rude, and blunt, and insufferable, and unobtainable. With you, however, he could be kind. He could be loving. The speed with which his gentle voice melts your heart never lessens. This is Levi at his most vulnerable.

“I’m just drunk,” you tell him, your words slurring into each other. “I’m not dying.”

You hear a chuckle barely pass over his lips like a spring breeze, the sparkle in his eyes reminiscent of the way the sun reflects off the surface of a pond. The peaceful nature of your position is a worthy opponent to how your insides wage war on one another: nausea, dizziness, and the beginnings of what will become an absolutely splitting headache all contained within one disoriented body. “I would’ve gone with you, you know,” he says suddenly after a serene moment of silence. “I would’ve known when you needed to stop drinking.” He combs his fingers against your cheek, silvery eyes softening into pools of undeniable adoration.

“You would’ve been a complete buzzkill,” you reply, half joking as you close your eyes and enjoy the rare affection.

You hear a cross between a scoff and a laugh come from above you. “Keeping those brats from getting you so wasted that you start puking isn’t being a buzzkill. It’s called taking care of you.”

“I think I’m not drunk enough,” you say honestly. “We ran out of wine right at that stage where you could go to sleep or start throwing up, but there’s absolutely no chance of having a good time.”

He taps the top of your head with two fingers, prompting you to let him up. You oblige him, using the opportunity to lay down your bread and take a sip from the glass of water that rests on the side table. You watch as he saunters back toward the kitchen, wondering what he was doing somewhat, but mostly just trying to get a grip on your senses. You sit up as you wait on his return, laying your head back against the plush upholstery and taking deep breaths.

He’s back as quickly as he left, both hands behind his back in a feeble attempt to hide the wine glasses as their stems poked around to your view. You feel a smile creep onto your face as he unveils his master plan: a bottle of red wine and a glass for each of you. “Don’t expect this often,” he announces as he sets it all on the table, pulling a wine key from his pocket. He joins you on the couch, scooting in close so that your knees brush before you hear the satisfying pop of the cork and the relaxing swish of liquid on glass.

“You’re expecting me to believe that Captain Levi is offering to get drunk with me?” you giggle, almost nervous to reach for the wine in front of you. He laughs off your comment, reaching in front of him and lifting the glass to his lips; he takes only a sip before looking at you in expectation. You take yours as well, holding it up to his jokingly before you both bring them to your mouths.

After your first gulp, time begins to melt away. A movie-esque montage begins in front of your eyes: the sight of the man you love, once so stoic and so stiff, loosening and laughing the night away at your side; the feeling of typically isolated and scarce hands trailing carelessly along the length of your arms, warm against the sensitive skin of your wrists and your thighs; the smell of red wine spilled innocently on hardwood and upholstery without complaints or uprooting to clean it; the sound of his velvet and brass voice with his uncensored expressions of love, whispered and melodic; the taste of mint and jasmine tea on his unusually wandering lips.

What might be thirty minutes or three hours passes in a flash, leaving you sprawled across the couch with the drunken mess that is your typically reserved lover, legs utterly entangled so that you were unsure where you ended and he began. He’s whispering to you — that much you know — but his words are slurred, and you’re unbelievably distracted by the feeling of wet kisses being peppered along your jaw and ear. He grasps at your back, massaging and caressing and leaving no inch uncovered by his calloused hands as his touch reminds you why you breathe and laugh and plainly exist.

“Levi,” you whisper, your mind a tangled ball of twine save for the feeling of his breath on your cheek.

He hums in response, not bothering to look up at you. You can feel his grin against your jaw.

“We should get to bed, love.”

You’d be left to wonder how the two of you made it into the next room when morning came; rest assured there would be a trail from the couch to the bedroom door made from clumsily knocked-over knick knacks and your discarded clothes from the day to clue you in. If you were sober, you’d care enough about Levi’s wrath tomorrow to clean up behind the two of you; however, you aren’t sober, and you don’t care enough.

The two of you fall into the bed you share, intertwining your limbs like the threads of a tapestry, laying out plainly and beautifully the comfort you find in him. Your head finds his chest and his hands find your lower back, pulling you flush against him as his eyelids begin their threats to close before he is quite ready. He murmurs out your name, his hold on you growing more snug when it passes his lips. “I love you, s—” he falters, nuzzling his face in the top of your head. “So much.”

It’s short — and a pretty common thing for someone to say to the person they love — but it means everything coming from him. “I love you, Levi,” you tell him, praying to whatever is up there that you’ll remember this in the morning.

Soon, the two of you stop stirring and whispering. As you breathe him in, you try to hear his words in your mind as many times as you can before you slip out of consciousness. You begin to drift off to sleep, peaceful and content in his arms as you’ve ever been.

[monkey-network]

WarioWare: The Series Season 2 Episodes

52 Episodes, Season 3 Coming 20XX. Season 1*

Business is Booming: Wario’s house blows up and nobody wants to take him in except Penny... without Crygor Sr’s permission. So Penny does her best to hide the 200+ lb man from her grandfather while bots are sent out to fix the house.

WarioiraW: One of Orbulon’s pets, a gelatinous blob that can take the form of any being, escapes and takes the form of Wario. This fools everybody in the fact that the fake is friendlier than the actual one. Even Wario, who plots to take advantage of his impostor’s kindness.

Spare the Rod, Don’t Spoil the Child: 9-Volt must wait to see a movie, one 18-Volt saw at an early screening. Known to be a blabbermouth, 9V does his best to shut out 18-Volt and spoilers of any kind before the event, which puts a strain on their friendship.

Jimmy Two Shoes: Jimmy T. wants to watch a game, but his tendency to not say no gets the better of him when everyone suddenly needs him.

Cricket and the Octopus of Fortitude: Young Cricket has to take care of Master Mantis’s pet while he goes to the doctor. The octopus doesn’t take kindly to Cricket’s overprotective nature, so it tries to outwit the apprentice with some outside help.

You’re Not Funny: An anonymous joke is emailed all across DC and everyone is laughing themselves stiff... except for Ashley and Mike, the latter believing the joke wasn’t sent just for the heck of it. The two go to uncover the truth, and it may be up to the not funny Ashley to snap people back to reality.

Fronkenstein: Feeling inferior due to his size, Snag, 9V’s Fronk, goes to build a new body for itself.... using body parts from the WarioWare gang.

Taxidermy: A customer hops into Dribble and Spitz’s cab and must compress his urge to make stuffed animals out of them, while the driving duo are completely unaware of his serial reputation.

The Nunja: Kat & Ana meets Artie, a wolf ninja who’s confidence is more than her actual skill. They see that’s she’s talented in a different field, but are conflicted to tell her the truth when she truly wants to be a ninja like her family.

One Perfection: A new student arrives at Mona’s school, and is seemingly flawless in everything they do. Mona feels inadequate compared to them, until she finds out a secret insecurity about them that she wants to help them with.

Monday Night Manor Madness: It’s a rainy day and the WarioWare gang coup up at a reluctant Ashley’s house. All goes well until a haunting spirit starts to spook everyone, with even Ashley unexpectedly shuddering at the thought of encountering it. What’s the spirit’s true intentions, and how is Jimmy not afraid of ghosts?

Meet The Sellouts: One of Wario’s schemes causes massive damage and the animation budget crashes due to the medical bills. So Crygor comes up with a way to work around this while Wario spams a bunch of ads subliminal messages to hopefully make money back.

Animal House: Mona’s pets and Kat & Ana’s pets join forces to commit a supermarket heist.

Ode to the Stone: 9-Volt makes a new pal out of a rock, glue, a sharpie, and googly eyes at school. Immediately losing interest, he tosses it and it not only reaches the rest of the gang somehow, but their hearts as the lifeless friend helps them see a new perspective about themselves.

The “Hero” Gains: Lulu* feels like she lacks a special hero attack, so she goes around Diamond City to see if she can have one of her very own. But like Wario always implies, it’s what’s on the inside that counts.

Drone Alone: Doris 1, the robot Crygor rescued from Agate forest, is left to take care of the lab while the doctor and Mike go to Penny’s talent show. Time unfortunately puts Doris on an emotional journey when an hour feels like an eternity.

Sea of Green: After a successful treasure hunt, Wario is stranded in the middle of the ocean with little to eat besides a bag of edible cacti. The cacti might leave an effect on him, but it might be the big guy’s only chance of making it home.

Late Night Cruise Control: When not on the clock, Spitz hosts a talk show that gives the latest news and brought in tons of celebrities. But when ratings start to drop, will our mechanic resort to low hanging fruit to garner back an audience, or can Dribble the music pitbull pick the show up from this funk?

Full Metal Jacket: Manager Joe, Mona’s employer and friend, creates a clothing line based on the WarioWare gang and everyone is loving it. But business becomes an empire and Joe starts losing that generous side he had, leaving Mona to bring him back down to earth.

Krumpet Scouts: 18-Volt is trying to earn money for a limited edition video game cover, but is too young for a job. He tries joining a cookie selling gang, but it’s for girls only. So he asks 13-Amp to join in his place.... while dressing up as a girl to make double the money.

Pyoro Over: The creators of Pyoro are retiring and the WarioWare gang set out to give them an explosive send off celebration since it was the company’s inspiration.

Your Greatest Feeture: Cricket’s shoes wear out and the young ward is struggling to find the right pair. But is the loss of his slippers an opportunity to learn a new technique?

Two Fros on a Sofa: Jimmy T and Jimmy P encounter each other at a bus stop and luckily finds a comfortable sofa to wait. The sofa, however, is actually a prototype rocket Orbulon left behind and the two have to work together to land the couch safely.

Flavorful Fallacy: Orbulon, realizing he left his couch in the middle of the city, goes to see where it might have gone. He meets an old man, who has a prejudice against aliens, and the two start to fight over which flavor of ice cream is better.

The People v. WarioWare Inc. (Part 1): A chipper and well meaning cult leader creates a lawsuit against the WarioWare gang for their unintentionally ludicrous crimes in the city. Wario doesn’t believe there’s a case against them, but testimony and evidence suggests otherwise and even with Mona knowing the law by hand, the gang can’t find a loophole to their reckless nature.

The People v. WarioWare Inc. (Part 2): The gang is about to serve jail time for their pretty criminal deeds of the past, but Wario’s encouragement and a special hint from the audience helps them realize that while they’re guilty, scapegoating the right person can lead to a means of escape.

Bored Games: Since the trial put everyone on edge (and house arrest), Jimmy invites the gang over for game night. Wario can’t join them, and this creates a vacuum as to who is the 2nd most conniving opportunist in the group.

Scientifically Supernatural: Ashley and Penny team up to create a being of both magic and nature and get along pretty well. The project, however, starts to rampage the town and the two fight over who’s responsible, with Red as the mediator.

Double Dribble: Dribble and Spitz enter their cab into a Rocket League type derby that puts their driving and piloting skills to the test.

He’s Back, An Unfortunate Revenge Story: Wario escapes from prison and plots to get his revenge on the one who put him there. Or ones...

The “Hero” Movie: Lulu enters a home movie into a film contest and wins thanks to Wario’s meddling. So after getting persuaded into competing for state, Lulu turns to Wario and he agrees to help if she constantly pays him, resulting in the two making “Ryno Optimus II, A Sequel to the Chosen One: The Unreckoning”

Mona’s Stop: Mona finds out that her checks have been sent to the wrong address for a while and she becomes a multi-millionaire. Knowing she’s been working pretty hard already, she retires early to become the queen of Diamond City. This would be around the time Wario tries to swindle her out of her fortune, but he’s surprisingly happy for her.

Head Boppin’: Jimmy, Jamie, James, Papa, and Mama T. have switched brains somehow. Getting back to normal seems easy... if the family didn’t act and sound nearly the same.

The Lazy Day Saints: Another couch related episode? Yeah, except this time 9-Volt rebels against his mother and chore day by turning the sofa into a pirate ship with Snag, 18V, Penny, Kat, and Ana as his crew. Knowing 9-Volt won’t back down without a fight, 5-Volt and the neighborhood moms fight fire with fire, using lazyboys as their vessels.

The Ultimate Foe: Cricket faces the most horrifying challenge of his life: a slab of silly putty.

Awww... Crap, Love: Ashley falls for a demon she spawned from the Necronomicon. And while Red tries to stop the demon from unleashing hell unto town, 5-Volt and Mona try to teach the stone faced witch about love, romance, the birds an- wait she learned that already, so just the first two.

Your Opinion?: Wario posts a negative review on a movie he watched, and the city turns against him. He easily ignores them at first, until everyone becomes nastier than him and the internet comes to life to kill him.

Join us for T-Posing: Dr. Crygor accidentally sets off a gas that forces everyone to silently stand in tree position... except Wario because it’s too hard for him. So I GUESS it’s up to him to reverse this before they’re all stuck like that? Ouch.

Magic Mike ACT: 13-Amp works well with music on the mind, but a challenge has arisen in the form of a standardized test... in a soundless classroom. Desperate for a beat to work with, she looks to Mike to join her in staying cool while dealing with the work and the no nonsense teach.

Spacecataz: Does anyone know how fictional characters are able to breath in space without helmets or oxygen? Eh, doesn’t matter... cocky alien hunter Spiff Gibbous* is back to destroy Orbulon, this time the WarioWare gang is in tow. It’s Star Wargames, ya’ll!

Knitwit: Dr. Crygor takes a major interest in knitting and this makes him a laughing stock among other mad scientists. Discouraged at first, Crygor soon schools his hecklers about the ingenuity of threading and needling.

Wario Und Pantser: In a 60s style episode, Wario-Man and Dynogirl (Mona) are on the case to find the criminal who’s been pulling people’s pants down.  

Flipping the L: Waluigi gets to be in this episode... and doesn’t know what to with his screen time. So what’s a reject to do besides immediately erase the show’s universe all together and come up with his own?

The Shuriken Heart of the Cards: 9-Volt wants to join Kat & Ana on their special delivery, Ana more accepting while Kat worries about him being a potential burden. However, when they get ambushed by skilled ninja.... card players, it’s 9V’s time to shine.

Stereo Street Fighter: An old foe of Master Mantis returns with a new style of fighting that towers Mantis’s more ancient techniques. Cricket, with the help of Jimmy T, try to master a new style of martial arts with the power of funk. The perfect time for Cricket to sport a rocking afro of his own.

You Have to Go: Death has come for Wario, but continuously gets sidetracked by the gang when they’ve yet to find the special treasure he buried somewhere.

Cadillacs & Yoshisaurs: I forget this is also Mario’s universe sometimes. So anyway Yoshi eggs start appearing in Diamond City and everyone’s loving them. But they’re then caught between raising pretty rowdy animals and letting a Magikoopa poach them away.

The LIVE WAHundredth Episode (Yikes, this many?): Wario is eager to celebrate the show’s special episode on stage, but somebody kidnaps the gang and leaves them in the middle of a forest, forcing everyone to work together to head back to the studio. In the meantime, Lulu and Joe are forced to entertain the audience and start to have fun with it.

Quid Pro Wario: Young puppies look to Wario for lessons on becoming con artists, with Jimmy P not taking this well.

How to Stop Worrying and Love the Cruise: 9 and 5-Volt are on a ocean liner they won in a sweepstakes and aren’t taking it well, with 5V struggling to have fun and 9V getting seasickness.

Get Nasty: Mona makes a painting everyone has mixed feelings towards it for being too obscene, so she tries to go wild with her art to get better publicity by being more shocking.

Wario’s World (Hour Long Season Finale): A fart fueled nuke sends Diamond City into a post apocalyptic setting, where a grown up Lulu leads a resistance against the Immortan Wario’s greed fueled wrath, Empresses Kat & Ana are at war with Cricket, Dribble, Spitz, and Orbulon fighting off a colossal meteor, and the only one who could possibly bring everyone together is Mike, 18 Volt (now 21 Volt), Red, and Ashley, who is dying from the putrid radiation.

[cipzi-shop]

Daddy 2020 Mask The One Where I Was In Lockdown T Shirt

It will come out for another year they talked about a Daddy 2020 Mask The One Where I Was In Lockdown T Shirt lotand for those you estimate the LiveWire late last probably is one of the pioneer the pilot dealers so I will be getting the LiveWire for sure next year so if you’re interested in the electric vehicles that me out because I will have a lot of content with the LiveWire when it comes out but it will be out for the year person hears a some more trikes death to you got traction control is trike replacement braking system drag towards the control noted they went away from the air suspension guys they went away from their suspension on the like now know I glad to have you got an adjustable hand adjusted between preload now yes the audio also limits of the 114 guys the regular ultra classic they have a 107 still the blue say is gorgeous guys I shot the CVO’s at the beginning of this video so you want to seeand you can realign this videoand I publish it now by Mr Max on beer for sure I said is a good bid I like John I saw a lot of a last request guysand on to stop every sinand at 50 minutes yeah those are new socks that five I guide the reader to haul the suspense I try glideand add traction controland now the trikes got a big improvement this year were seeing Mario is Mario I night I severally know you got any magenta Chinese got major overall this year thanks guys every sellout thank you very much any last request some Mike legacy yeah I could figure out a is a 48 so I was out of the 48 as is the electric are on the Blue Max as they call it Blue Max nothing different on the Fortier guys you will you will come as a question of the details of the 48 know the 40 I’m sure use a custom paint color so that can you look differently at 48 the 42 usually painted on the minor regular 40 right now they added the case on a 48 the Blue Max different that the custom color that electricity lines on it my favorite like so farand I’m a fan so far the ethics field is newand fresh I think the mass by five to buy a brand new bike this year it was a CDL I like the new CVO road by Xeroxand I seriously but still it’s hard to say guys that I still love my street by special 35 guys in my history by special again yeah the diner is gone sorry I no more Dina guys for United guys out there the new soft those are better for as much as people don’t like to except that then you thought the frame is better than the old Dina’s so suck it upand gastric Bob or low rider Arafat Bob because they are better bikes I got close friend employees are giving her Dina’s right now to get a new soft out because they’re coming to the reality that the new framing is not the frame is better fly guys on the signoff in the uppermost in our if you want to see some new stuff you can realign this videoand check out some of the silicon thought you got The 2020 roadster which is’s performance focused sportsterand I think that indicator of performance is going to be the frontand despite got a outside our frontand from chalets need to build this breaks what those two things do get a lot of confidence under braking getting a lot of suspension performance in your rang a little bit more aggressively the way to achieve is with a little bit stiffer front suspensionand easily get really hard on the brakes not have a lot of break guide to help you control the movement of the bikeand is still this breaks they can really prevent any kind of break fate so when you Canyon Road stopping at high speeds overand over again experience that letter starting to get softerand softer we just saw there that we had Abdul lines going towards the front brakes what those dude is that it is indicated this bike is equipped ABS which is optional on this model the guy a low set of handlebars relatively low barley standards which was in a slightly forward leaning writing position does make you feel it’s for your overall security analog tachometer with the digital speedometer I think I really also indicates the performance focused nature of this bike making tachometer front center in day lets you know exactly where you are me the engine gradsand as you shiftand downshift more accurately little more confidence this is the 3. 5 million words according to Caro we’re taught Lord Acton’s axiom all power corruptsand absolute power corrupts absolutely I believe that when I started these books but I don’t believe it’s always true anymore what I believe is always true about power is that power always reveals when you have enough power to do what you always wanted to do NEC with the guy always wanted to do so that an email that quickly mean the thing we spent the last eight seasons assessing overand are now months late getting to our spicy hot takes a big thingand say the stories don’t need to have a point or weren’t intended to have a point that this was intended to have a point since it ended with Dragon burning the symbol for such a character driven show really the main issue down to that the charactersand we will start with the fact that by the end of the show the Indy outlined a lot of plot points without giving much thought as to how characters might be motivated to reach those plot points to a huge chunk of season eight is spent on dialogue rationalizing plot points that don’t really make sense the student be half as many as a beautiful green snow should do nothing today lifted the moment the case fell the battle was over to a friend that just burned 54 in the county know they don’t make sense of they have to spend a lot of time rationalizing them is on memory keep all the stories in order for the plot to progress as outlined everyone especially characters in earlier seasons were defined by the cunningand intelligent decayand a total dummy woman is my season eight this was you might say foreshadowed in season seven by little fingers downfall which only works of every character involved in the subplot took a bunch of stupid pills that you little finger doesn’t like that Ari is back so he tries to pit the two sisters against each otherand play some surviving for some reason despite knowing what an untrustworthy ass hat he is that I now switcheroo stand accused of metadata stand accused of treason how do you want charges Bayless hello everyone knocks down many an intelligence unit watches this worthless subplot bleed out on the floor because the character of little finger is redundant nowand we don’t know what to do with him so goodbye to it takes Ariand sunset entire season to realize they’re being played over nothing basically but here in season seven everyone cut a case in addendum’s which only worsens in season eight forgot about beerand sleep in the idea that the sisters were on the little fingerand were just playing along the whole time is good head cannon in theory by well here’s a quote from Isaac instead writing plays brand actually seen that clearly got cut a short scene with salsa where she knocks on brands doorand says I need your help or something along those lines so basically as far as I know the story was that it suddenly occurred to something that she had a huge CCTV department at her discretionand it might be a good idea to check with him first before she gets her own sister so he just ranand ran tells her everything she’s known she’s like oh no sounds you have been done duty after the should show that was season five sums onto stand there happy that at least one of the women got to be in charge without having to be put down Michael Geller that if we made for a moment be honest with ourselves her entire character has been one massive train wreck ever since season fiveand little fingers like hey Mary the son of the guy who murdered your entire familyand she’s like all okay this is the fast track to Raytown escapeand in season seven she completes her evolutionand the lady finger stripped of all Pecos because to be in the female empowerment shedding your humanity until you are a stone cold badass but you know the kind you only does some hideously inhumane executions to be clear I am not on the sponsor he trained I just think they popped a squad over her character just like they did everyone else my season eight everyone’s gushing over how smart something is she’s evolved into her final form unlike in earlier seasons where her intelligence would come out for these moments of her being more quick thinking that people expected and it would be bad the amount of ore by her playingand her enemies arrogance so you’ll be outside the gates the bank doesn’t discuss plans for super goes through grace to write to close reading about God’s they see my brother will you pretend she now gets these girl badass moments that built not on the lesson she learned includes landing is set on high sciences earlier defining attributes was her compassion that she cared about people despite the pain she was in the books she never loses essence of compassion but get smarter about figuring out who is worthy of itand who is playing her for their own advantage here in the show that warmth is totally extinguished compassionand appeals to goodness her friends not as a strength but as immature weakness that she needs to outgrow sheep little guy was she dreams you never learn new empowerment sunset doesn’t act like someone who would take pity on a drunk night in Joffrey’s wrath or someone who would have any ounce of empathy for someone like the house like she didn’t seem to something the Crips doesn’t bother trying to call me other womenand children what she did during the siege of King’s Landing in season two new empowerment song to spend the whole battle trash talking to NARA’s between final Dragon Queen who unlike salsa is out there risking her life out the tool will be dead season it keeps telling us what something is she thought that she smart that she shrewd but nothing in her actions support that earlier something would know to keep her mouth shut about someone she was suspicious of me while new empowerment sunset won’t shut up about how much she doesn’t like to NARA’s Y during some of the entire Kings landing storyline keeps herself alive by feigning loyalty to Joffreyand Circe with you paying for the cost have mercy on us all to me even if she did plan on undermining to NARA’s I guess the Indy kind of forgot that one of salsa’s most important lessons is when to feign respect to Delhi what dragons eat anyway whatever they want something evolution mirrors the Starks as a whole the compassionand ability to define the Starks is one of their biggest asset in the end they’re no better than the Lancers’s trust you will don’t know you know she’s not one of us change their house motto from winter is coming to you got mine because that’s female empowerment of the show runners I’m glad I got raped actually Mr the hound it made me a cool girl badass finger stayed in the so something is a northern separatist now for some reason even though now is not the time they remember what happened lost dragons both yet nothing nothing happened when a on the Conger invaded the North Bend the knee immediatelyand join the seven kingdoms without a fightand nobody died the countryside was not burning aided the time was called the King who knelt for a reason I guess someone kinda forgot they remember what happened lost dragons both sworn I read the lowest king in the north was tarring stock human needs my ancestor egg until Gary there are cases to be made for an independent North doing well in the past this whole situation in winter felt we have written for season eight data actually makes pretty good case for United seven kingdoms will you sure dead howling to feed the great the good thing we got to reach a part of the seven kingdoms which also happens to support the nurses claim it wasn’t even that they had it on lot before the NARA showed up with all these mouths to feed this time he wouldn’t have enough food special enough the armies of the North back to defend with how are we going to feed our own people was a problem at the beginning of the season is set upand promptly ignored what dragons eat anyway you know what salsa it doesn’t matter don’t worry your empowered little head about itand join us dragonsand supplies from other regions now that it’s winterand you all have a common enemy you seem determined to dislike like they did yesterdayand will get to the nearest but what they did the sauces depressing sauces only purpose the season is to have an unfounded suspicion of the nearest which only proves to be found in when the nurse does something completely nonsensical otherwise the nurse has essentially given all of her resources to defend winter felt east on the promise of the guy in chargeand salsa still like now I don’t like the cut of her gym Y by the end of the stupid dumb battle of winter felt the nurses prove yourself worthy of being a queen about as well as one can expect in this universe is forging alliances doing battle keeping her promises to her followersand to her allie The stink eye over to NARA’s makes no sense she never even lived to the target area is hurting her family the operative word Matt King burned her grandfatherand uncle to death but she sure did Circe you know their common enemy whose family wiped her own out sauces mistrust of the nurse only makes sense if you’re writing from the end forward telling us she is smartand her intelligence is really just writer clairvoyance giving salsa suspicions without giving her any reason to have them other than the writers know how the show will landand they want something to look smart Dragon Queen does not have to do them or maybe I do know sauces jealous because the nurse is pretty surely they would never come I anyway within the fan favorite recall that my seasoning held late season five is nothing to doand no reason to be here that people like him so here he is planning a different ending for bronze plate when I had some character development seven during the Lutra attack Ron loses his goal in a very symbolic moment even leaves it to risk his life in a big way to save Jamie with no mercenary reason for doing so is this a sign of character development is Braun changing his ways knowand guess who gets the worst subplot of all time you do you do you boys are of goldplated so Circe asked Bron to go murder her brothers as you do she do the trees Bron fast travels to winter felland holds the Met arrow pointand tells them he thinks their side will win because dragons so he blackmails Jamieand Terryand into giving him our God will hike better than okay so for those of you playing the home game high garden is the capital of the reach of the now extinct house Tyrelland the breadbasket of the seven kingdoms the most populous yes there are probably still many Tyrell’s next in line to claim the reach to say nothing of the other great houses in the reach with a much better claim to theand install certain no name is Lord of high garden because of black male under a queen that was only clean for five minutesand yeah that’s going to go over well with all these other lesser houses in the reach high God but okay we do not see Bron again into the finale where not only is now the master of coin money before the rules but hearing is apparently made good on that whole promise made it gunpoint thing so Braun will go to Fargo paramount reach of most of you should have written offand that good night liked Ariana Harris but okay here he is still cooland in a season has turned pretty much all the charactersand the stupid dumb dumb Zakaria situation for shit because the plot needs them to be open there is one character who tactical nosedive probably hurts the most one character was arguably done dirtier than the nearest season it’s Lord Ferris the best there is the master of whispers becomes the master of loud treasonous conversations great creek like Ron Taveras is a fan favorite but the show runners clearly had no idea what to do it after season for because his character starts wildly deviating from his passion but like to stuff you should select to pick up your shit out of I guess in his case they’d figure right around this laterand they did so by making the smartest guy in the realm of total dumb dumb there is in the books wants to instill a guy on the throne who may or may notand probably is not be the lost son of Ray Gardner egg on target areaand the next in line to the throne if we have a target area restoration fans call him saying on the show we don’t have they gone but there is need something to do so at the beginning of season five interiorand cross the narrow sea with the express intent to support the nurse now even though there is totally try to have her assassinated in season 1 last night it asked how to I do would have to be done apparently she’s willing to move past that is when the training of the Eno in a world where executions are routine this seems like kind of a reasonable threat he has tried to have her assassinated beforeand here we are one season later again with poisoning dragons but then in season eight he will she make a sad face at dinner meeting you’re not really getting to me runners I guess she does ignore his shitty advice which has no consistently been shitty ever since they got to West Roseand is in this case as it turns out wrong from a tactical perspective they do in the battle easilyand with minimal casualtiesand know they did next need to restand no food was never an issueand resources were never an issue so why bother having this conversation but there is finds out that John Snow is the actual egg on target areaand was he has the better claim to the throne does what he wantsand you know what is the season for some trees in the well I will dedicate myself to seeing you behind because I want to dragons in the best rationality can come up with Rivera’s wanting to support John over to NARA’s is the philosophy that the best person to rule is the person who specifically doesn’t want to rule if you consider the best to be someone who doesn’t want Robert was neither not local recently have no interest in being well meaning as John keeps failing upward so that tracks mentioned nominally being for the good of the realmand then immediately reversing your state the moment you see a young guy whose neighborhood County love him be like wow yeah that some leadership material right there is a map which makes them more appealing to the rules of Western the problem is only makes sense if you are the audienceand you seen John Snow’s temperament for the last eight seasons there is on the other hand has not there is no reason to like or trust John Snow other than he likedand trusted Ned gas who wasn’t actually his father anyway there’s only just met John Snowand in universe has no reason to think that he’s a better more tempered choice than to NARA’s unless he knows what the audience we the audience know about John Snow but from the outside looking in the narratives all over the place John Snow’s only been in charge of the North for like a weekand it’s kind of been a shit show came back sure what for the first three episodes of season she’s a war hero dragons that sacrifice half for troopsand one of those dragons to save humanity the only thing she doesn’t upset for that mildly questionable is the patient about wanting to takings landing except she’s not wrong about anything mentally have left exhausted the fight better if you have time to restand recuperate well clearly they don’t I promised you I would look you in the yardand speak directly if I ever thought you were making a mistake well maybe your advice shouldn’t have been so uniformly badand maybe he was mad that she went against his advice but that particular advice again ended up being wrong King landing was stupid easy to take because battles are easy now because we need to wrap this shit up the city last time it was attacked by note better than anyone it will for tomorrow’s based on what those dragons have the fortitude of hummingbirds up until now it seemed pretty evenly matched you know whatever Solaris who has sacrificed all the rally much power to the nearest immediately switches sides the second he discovers that there’s a poutyand decisive male alternative with great hair but the nearest has at this point done nothing to make Barris logically want to switch sides one time she went against her advisers advised before this was to save John Snow you know that guy that there is wants to betray to NARA’s forand so he starts telling everyone who John Snow is doing so makes more or less the exact same mistake that led start date in season one only way stupider this is way more recklessand way less motivated than what Ned did in season one John abdicated that other thing you can do I don’t want to never tell John Snow knew a guy who did abdicate until your mama screw this of John Snow Jones there’s a scene in the second episode of game of thrones season one in which John Snow asks Ned Stark met his motherand then responds with this stream burden motion to’s this is eventually going to come to something emotionally charged an important so are you even start with this long section from the moment in many ways John Snow is emblematic of everything wrong with the way the series handled its resolution a big emotional profound set up with the flaccid confusingand meaningless pay off from a plot perspective most of the major letdowns from all of the moment to set up are pretty much tied in the John Snow the Whitewater plot of which John was the key point of view character are plus L equals J the mystery of John’s parentage which kind of indirectly kicked off the plot of the whole show John Snow being brought back from the dead by the Lord of lightand of course John’s love for to NARA’s culminating with her murder done in an uncharacteristically dishonorable way after Johnson is resurrected they keep making this big deal about how he must’ve been brought back for a reason to you wants realize why I don’t know what indeed was the point well considering the call you did during the long night I’m guessing the Lord brought you back so you can blue ball to NARA making her go crazyand ultimately instill brand the broken on the throne good job Lord of late like her plot was this existential threatand been built up for eight seasons predicated on a historical long night that lasted an actual generationand nearly wiped out humanity last generation casos is making was John’s principal antagonistand his main motivation for the run of the show but not only was the big bus easily stepped away by a character that had nothing to do with the Whitewater plot the long night was about as long as a viewing of Titanic with a couple of bathroom breaks downand instead of merely living out humanity it wiped out about one half of one Army seamstress the author argues actually Western Markand we learned that after that’s done it doesn’t enter that the world of men was to preoccupied with political squabbles to worry about an endless fortified zombies because all you need to do in the existential threat is the one special knife of no importance is a recurring problem which ties in with what we were talking about the last episode subverting expectations despite the fact that it doesn’t work for the story are used training as a faceless man builds not at all to this could have been anyone with a strong tenure jump yeah the fact that the 19 focuses is wrap on Brandon John Snow means that Brandon John Snow should have been involved here is a Mina Jones now needed to do this but he needed some resolution other than spending the battle screaming at his new archenemy on the Dragon tended I also saw one idea that Shearman Cheney killed 19 you know bring that old Kingsley are thankful for that would’ve been cooland give Jamie a reason for existing but enough of it made sense John’s main motivation is farting out of existence without any of his involvementand after it’s overand the only thing that has materially changed apart from the bloodletting of a couple of supporting characters is that the nurse finds out about John being a target areaand which not only has nothing to do with the why walkers really think they have in this world it probably would have happened eventually anyway but with regard to John learning the truth about who he is never really reacts to it the King go talk to supervisionand protection of the realm of revelation is momentous especially someone like John Snow whose entire identity was wrapped around his pastor Ness starts Boston installed bus the dog Boston is about the ship. And I saw the importance of being awake and after I had my child I thank God every day for knowing what I know about these fucking every single one of them told their victims what we did is a secret don’t tell mommy or daddy that’s not a roll that’s how they roll but the story I wanted to you about my daughter was when she was an infant she was probably about a month or two old and you know they were people in the family that didn’t that had a problem with me for some reason they would always call DCF and send DCF to my house all the fucking time never came to visit the child will call DCF down these yet that child is sick and needs to be examined when this motherfucker has never been to the house to visit the fucking child once right now is ridiculous in itself so one day I get a call DCF and S Department of child children and families are important so I called these yet is cold it is rainy that they right and the DCM woman says we got an anonymous tip that your daughter was sick and we need to date we need to take a downtown for an examination

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Post #1: Totally Confused About My Aversion to Seduction

Items Reviewed: Beck -- Colors and St. Vincent -- Masseduction

I revered Beck when I was a tween and too frightened of most boys. He was youthful and non-threatening, his music was fun and varied, and his videos were endlessly entertaining visual collages. I saw Beck’s music as a humorous and bright alternative to dire post-grunge alt-rock, so when 2002′s more sober Sea Change came out, my yet to be heartbroken self didn’t get it. I became a distanced, more casual fan who continued to buy and half-heartedly listen to subsequent releases. 

(Actually, this is only half-true, because I probably listened to Guero more than anything else in 2005. I did not remember that The Information existed until I began writing this.)

Following another ~*serious release~* (the Kanye-angering Morning Phase), Beck is back to sonically sunnier climes on Colors. I was initially curious about it on this point alone, but eyeing a number of divisive reviews left me very eager to listen in order to see what side of the fence I fell on. Turns out I’m just stuck looking at the fence and thinking, “huh?” 

This is pure POP Beck and I feel mildly uncomfortable about it. To put it a bit harshly, I feel more uncomfortable about Beck delivering straightforward, trite lyrics than I do about Beck being a Scientologist (which is something I’ve come to accept and also ignore). Even the songs I genuinely like I feel disconcerted about. “Up All Night” is sonically engaging and the hooks are great, but hearing someone who used to spout colorfully stream of conscious lyrics sing something bland like, “just wanna stay up all night with you / there’s nothing that I wouldn’t rather do” is a bit jarring. But I hate saying this because the song creates an honest feeling of joy and, eight songs in, serves as a surprising highlight. Truly the album’s latter half holds more pleasures than its first half-hearted half. “Square One” sounds like Phoenix, which I don’t really mind at all, and “Wow,” even with a not-great freestyle, begins with a flute loop that will never get out of your head. The first half of Colors has an all right song that sounds like The Police (”Seventh Heaven”), one song with an amazing chorus (”I’m So Free”), one nicely melodic psych song (”Dear Life”) and that’s about it. 

All this said, I have already listened to Colors far more than I have the last three Beck releases combined, so the triteness and the pure POP of the whole thing may just be a mild distraction from some genuinely good tunes. 

Rating: 3 - More confused than disappointed

St. Vincent’s Masseduction is taking up the second half of this post because it reminds me in a lot of ways of Beck’s 1999 release Midnite Vultures (which, at the time, I found to be a delight). It has a similar flirtation with Prince-style sexiness yet feels wholly unsexy in the process. It also feels half like a joke, but that may just be my read on it -- this is the most mainstream Annie Clark has ever been, but I feel like it’s more a ~*commentary*~ on pop, rather than a sellout move. I want to appreciate a talented lady undermining the establishment but, I just can’t! I can’t! I’m sorry, I don’t get it! 

And, believe me, I have tried so hard to get St. Vincent. I’ve seen her live twice. Didn’t do anything for me. I’ve listened to all her records and found some things to really like about her self-titled, but they haven’t stuck with me. I love pretension and humor, but her brand of both leaves me cold. And, apart from her cool guitar playing and lovely voice, I just don’t find her songs that good. Critics seem to love her -- I feel like a lot of backhanded sexism and “Emperor’s New Clothes”-style shit is going on here. 

Let’s keep in mind, though, I get perturbed by really trivial things sometimes. So when Annie gives a “yass queen” delivery on the title track in reference to Nick Cave and the Bad Seeds’ The Boatman’s Call, I get irked to the ceiling. Same goes for slipping what is most likely intended to be a Pop Group reference (see their “I’ll hold you like a gun” and then Annie’s “I’ll hold you like a weapon”; also, she’s covered it before) into a sleazy-ass pop song. I love the Pop Group! I love sleazy pop songs! I don’t like either here!

So much of the album is so pointedly artificial and contrived that it makes the more human and emotional songs -- like “New York” and “Smoking Section” -- feel less effective. This does not seem to be the same reaction a lot of people are getting; I think the aim is to make these more naked songs all the more startling, but the effects are adverse on me. Simply the use of “motherfucker” in “New York” irritates me, like its purpose is to save the whole thing from becoming a Norah Jones song or something. “Smoking Section” just feels like Kurt Weill by way of Kate Bush  but done better elsewhere. It feels kind of mystifying to take that turn after much of the artificial glamour that’s come before (but again, I guess that’s the point). 

The artificial, excessive sexiness trope often has potential, but here it just feels embarrassing. “Savior” comes across winking and dirty, but deep down it sounds awkward (and that’s before I knew Annie’s aunt and uncle guested on the track). “Young Lover” is my favorite song on here, but the “I wish I was your drug” conceit of the chorus never needed revival. 

Although Masseduction’s post-apocalyptic, ambiguous and alien sexiness is causing it to be lauded like it’s an upgraded version of Diamond Dogs, the current artifice-intensive St. Vincent live experience is being met with mixed reviews. A lot of comments Annie may be trying to make on artifice and celebrity seem to be lost on the general public, just like a lot of the more accessible aspects of St. Vincent’s appeal is lost on me. I am all for subverting the charts, but maybe Annie Clark just hasn’t mastered it yet. 

Rating: 4 -- disappointed about being disappointed