#so torn idk how to feel
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landosjpg · 4 months ago
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today’s race has been so bittersweet :(
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SET SIX - ROUND ONE - MATCH THREE
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"Electric Fan (Feel it Motherfuckers): Only Unclaimed Item from the Stephen Earabino Estate" (1997 - John Boskovich) / "Untitled" (Portrait of Ross in L.A.)" (1991 - Félix González-Torres)
ELECTRIC FAN (FEEL IT MOTHERFUCKERS): it makes me literally insane that’s all that’s left of him and he made sure it would stay remembered, something something the last trace of a breath immortalized the only way it could be. Feel it, motherfuckers. (courfeyracs-swordcane) (also submitted by callixton and weeweewhirlwind)
UNTITLED (PORTRAIT OF ROSS IN L.A.): It fucks me up SO MUCH. The artist's partner was named Ross, and died of AIDS in the same year this was created. The ideal weight is roughly the average of an adult man. The allegory there... people taking the candy, decreasing the weight, the same way people took away from Ross and every other victim of the AIDS crisis by refusing to help, to do anything at all. Except this has an "endless supply" of candy. People can take and take and it keeps coming back. They can't get rid of us forever. We will prevail and we will rebuild and I WILL be fucked up about this forever (ceaseless-rambler)
("Electric Fan (Feel It Motherfuckers): Only Unclaimed Item from the Stephen Earabino Estate" is an electric fan encased in plexiglass with vinyl faux etching and a plexiglass base with casters by gay American artist John Boskovich--Stephen Earanbino's partner. It was the last item left in Stephen Earabino's estate after his death by AIDS and measures 56 7/8 x 22 3/4 x 12 1/2 in. (144.5 x 57.8 x 31.8 cm). It is held by The Museum of Contemporary Art in Los Angeles.
"Untitled (Portrait of Ross in LA)" is a modern art installation consisting of wrapped candies (constantly removed and replaced) by gay Cuban-American artist Félix González-Torres after the death of his partner, Ross, by AIDS. The weight is equivalent to a healthy human male - approximately 175 lbs (79kg). It is located at the Art Institute of Chicago, Chicago.)
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gophergal · 1 year ago
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Life on the farm
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bunnihearted · 2 months ago
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being too weird and unlikable and off putting and always being shunned and turned into an outcast everywhere i go and not having felt the connection and healing friendship has on you for so many years has really done a number on me
#irl mostly. but even online. i cannot connect or find communities or support systems the way most of u can#even if i do have found great connections and one connection in particular im more than grateful for#but i have had so much of my humanness torn off for so long that i am awkward and useless in handling it#but yeah idk :/ im just so profoundly jealous of how everyone can just fit into a slot#even online when ppl talk abt being anxious and stuff they still have ppl to talk to#or ppl irl to hang out with and im like.. wow... i cant even do that :/#it is just so lonely in general. and it has made me confused and incapable of knowing how to be a human#and fully realise and actualize the one connection i do have#if i had gotten to learn and now know how to be a human and a person i would've... been a person#but now i feel so removed and far away from that idek how...#like im at a point where i cant even have simple and shallow conversations online bc im like so useless#maybe only other ppl with avpd and who have been socially rejected and isolated and alienated can fully understand what i mean#it is so scary and weird and i feel such deep envy for how people can just like... talk to eo. irl and online. i dont get it#and like the connection i do have that i mention bc it is so important to me.. that does all of those things#but it is like im so not used to anyone even keep wanting to have a connection with me#that i feel like bambi on ice 💀 for lack of a better metaphor#and inside of me idk how to dare to open up to it bc i've been numb and shut off i just dont know#i dont know. but i want to but idk how.#ahhhhhh wanna scream bc just trying to describe it so i can make sense of it is frustrating!!!!#it also sucks bc other ppl really dont seem to get how fkn weird and scary it is to feel so removed from humanness#and not even be able to do most basic human people things most ppl who are mentally ill or anxious do.. i cant even do that idk#talking and communicating is the main thing like ppl do not understand how fkn hard it is for me to even have a simple convo#and i cant explain it bc theres no way someone who doesnt feel the same and have avpd could get it...#but idk. i just hate all of this and i wish i had a normal functioning brain. i just wanna be like everyone else#even ppl w social anxiety are capable of having friends. and im terrified of losing the only connection i've somehow been lucky to get#in my hands??? im so scared of losing that but idk HOW to be a person and idk!!! idk!!#other ppl dont even think abt these things im so fkn jealous lmao#anyway whatever 😔
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thefabledpheasant · 4 months ago
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Let me know your thoughts/reasoning in the tags!
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maegalkarven · 5 months ago
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In light of Alicole reveal, let me just say that I will absolutely LOSE my mind (in the best possible way) if the reason Daeron was sent to Oldtown is because he has brown hair.
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glitterghost · 9 months ago
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Belle (2023) 🌹
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agapestricken · 29 days ago
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hello, hello, you all — so... i hope you all are having a great thursday thus far, and i thought i'd bring this up now since i hadn't before; but with ana's zombification comes some noticeable differences to his behavior as well as appearance. because, and don't get me wrong, he was already pale before... but now anastasiy's skin now has this pallor that takes on a sickly look. and it has become necessary for ana to have to apply some concealer to his skin daily to hide the fact that his lips are, indeed, sort of tinged blue + some veins (particularly around his eyes and mouth) can clearly be seen and it definitely isn't the most uhh. natural look, to say the least JSJSJ
now, i'll probably cover more about his behavioral differences later, but one thing is that this man does have these SICK and TWISTED urges to consume human flesh as a zombie would in typical fiction would... so that's lovely / j LMAO nahhh, i'm totally being sarcastic with y'all right now as that is actually horrifying. but anastasiy does try his darndest to resist giving into this temptation because cannibalism is a BIG no-no in society for a reason (because its absolutely terrible and extremely gross) + with... slightly mixed results 😬
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screechingfromthevoid · 3 months ago
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"I don't think I have anymore hard nos" EXCUSE ME MR. O'BRIEN CAN WE TAKE THAT BACK A SECOND
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marsixm · 4 months ago
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well that was….. A Movie
#i have too many thoughts. unfortunately#its kinda hard to see this so long after it came out bc the humor feels soooo mid 2010’s and its debatable how well its aged#all i know is personally i feel like the dc mvoie#*dc movies have done a better job in recent years doing this specific r rated humor focused anti hero stuff#also like i for one love a comedy and love things having a humorous streak#but this is like a really standard grey action#*movie but then it puts all the humor on one character and that doesnt worklike at all lmao#like the really good parts are when hes with the other 2 funny characters (the bartender and the old lady)#they also like didnt do enough at all with lampooning superhero tropes? like at all???#it would have been so easy to have a standard superhero#movie but just lampoon it the whole time and instead they just… had that movie and like idk#fmcndkfndk like???#one of the few saving graces was in universe acknowledging that deadpool is annoying lol#but yeah generally it had a lot of ELEMENTS of good stuff just. not mixed well together#this truly is the granddaddy of reddit movie tho#like its not le epic win bacon bc thats more early 2010.#this is like. those milennial cookbooks that are hiphopified by just adding swear words. for some reason#torn bc i feel like i should judge ppl for this being so popular but im like not surprised that it would have mass appeal#on the surface i get the appeal of ‘a superhero BUT HE CURSES OOOOH’ and just generally taking things less seriously#it just sucks that the entire rest of the movie takes itself perfectly seriously#but not enough to have weird little annoying plot holes#also cant rly judge the guy who said he loved these movies hes a nerdy 38 yr old mild mannered white man. this was made for him.#this is elder milennial dadsk Wells For Boys
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pearly-sims · 1 year ago
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Looking suspiciously vampiric tonight girl
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haven-of-dusk · 5 months ago
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The thoughts nobody asked for on the much discussed 7x10 Tevan/Bucktommy/Bummy/whatever you wish to call them dinner date:
From a character perspective it's...fine. i really struggle to come up with an alternative word for it, because I struggle to have strong feelings at all about it. We've known since last season (at the latest, arguably sooner) that Buck has a kinky side. Now we know Tommy has one too. And they flirted about it. Neither of them were really acting out of character, and the scene was perfectly tolerable. But...that's sort of the problem.
From a writing standpoint, this scene is...kind of an abysmal failure. Or at least I presume it is, but it depends on what the writers wanted to accomplish with the scene.
If the goal was to solidify the Bucktommy relationship, bring more people on board, end the season strong, etc, then it failed. Miserably. Because in an episode full of story-essential moments, emotional beats, drama, and so forth, there's just this date scene doing...nothing. It doesn't push Buck or Tommy forward as characters, it does nothing meaningful to develop their relationship beyond the surface layer we've known it's had since their first episode together, and its only tie to the episode's main plot is a transition into a joke. They set Tommy up to finally develop his character, give some backstory, have him comiserate with Buck, build their rapport...and then we skip right to 'teehee, daddy issues.' It feels like the middle of the scene is missing.
Like...stay with me here, and don't jump away just because I'm bringing up Buddie, but the 3x9 kitchen scene is a prime example of what it seemed like the 7x10 date scene was going for. We start with a connection to the episode's plot, framed semi-light heartedly ("So she shoots him, and then takes him back?"), we transition into them having a serious, meaningful conversation, with Buck apologizing for his absence during the lawsuit arc and them discussing Eddie's boxing crisis, and then the scene ends on a lighthearted note with the infamous "wanna go for the title?"
So the issue with the 7x10 date is that the middle section, the emotions, the bulk of the conversation, just isn't there. It's like making a sandwich but ending up with just the pieces of bread. Yeah, you can still eat it, but it's not really the same thing, is it? It's lacking the SUBSTANCE.
And this ties into a larger problem with Tommy...he just never gets ANYTHING to do or say beyond surface level comments or observations. I hear the defense repeatedly that "it's a short season" "give them time to flesh him out more" "they didn't have space to include all the development, but they've got good seeds!", but this date scene is the very blatant counterpoint. This was a PRIME chance to do something with him, in an already story heavy episode, a season finale no less, and to tie his discussion of his trauma in with Buck's and have them bond over painful memories, give them a dynamic about HOW they approach those discussions, ANYTHING. But instead we skip past the development and end on a passable joke. This is a short, condensed season, yes. It's why I accepted them cutting most of the bachelor party because it was just fun and the episode needed to focus on development and story. But this date has no more story or character weight than the party did. They giftwrapped an oppurtunity for themselves, and then squandered it.
Which brings me to the question...do the writers even want me to root for Buck and Tommy's relationship? Because if so they are doing a TERRIBLE job of it. Tommy barely appears, and when he does they do nothing with him. They feel as though they are actively avoiding giving Bucktommy a dynamic or developing anything about why Tommy in particular is a good fit for Buck. Saying "he's good for you," doesn't cut it. Having them kiss twice, doesn't cut it. All of it leads me to wonder if they're just setting the couple up to break up cordially next season, Buck having learned more about himself, and Tommy...having a boyfriend for a few months I guess.
The daddy issues joke has caused a stir that overshadowed the real issue with the scene: Tommy still doesn't have a character, or a motive, or a dynamic with Buck, or anything. And it's starting to feel like he never will. And it's a bit frightening that I can't tell if it's intentional or not.
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laviejaguardia · 6 months ago
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Update!!!
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breezere · 2 years ago
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fuck u -tears off their sleeves-
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fakeoutbf · 5 months ago
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.
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piplupod · 4 months ago
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pretty sure i just got a spider bite while trying to fall asleep 🧍
#i thought it was just a stray hair on my elbow under the blanket and kept trying to shake it off#and then i finally went to brush it off w my hand and felt a bump there#and then it was unbearably itchy so i turned the lamp on to apply some anti-itch stuff bc it was driving me nuts#and i was trying to see where it was on my elbow bc wtf when did i get bit#and then i looked at it and it was very pale like a fresh bite and then there was some skin torn like a spider bite#i cant tell if theres two little holes or not and honestly idk if spiders always leave two fang marks fjdkdl#but it doesnt look like a mosquito bite unless i tore the skin myself from scratching at it#but the way it is looking... very similar to past spider bites#anyways i just removed everything from my bed and methodically searched Everything. looked all around the bed too. cannot find a spider#so. shrug. <- actually very afraid#but the thing that makes me Really think it's a spider is that the bump was super pale and now after a little while it is regular skintone#so that makes me think it was a brand new fresh bite the way it was a different colour and now its normal looking#which is uhhh scary! to have had a spider possibly in my bed!#and I can't find it so i simply do not Know and that is going to make it so hard to sleep tonight fjfkdl#man i barely ate today too so im just... really not doing well at this very moment fjfkdl#i cant eat anything rn though bc i already brushed my teeth and i dont want to do that again tonight fjfkdl#but i am. so hungry. augh. idk what I'd even eat anyways im too anxious to stomach anything#WHERE IS THIS SPIDER. WHY DID IT CHOOSE MY BED TO BE IN 😭#im in bed so often ... it should avoid places where ppl are ....#i feel like such shit rn fjdkdl i just rly wish i didnt have to deal w all these bugs#in the past month I've had a couple spiders and Several(!) weevils and a centipede and a clicker beetle and a couple earwigs#im just so tired of bugs i rly am fjfkdl idk why they choose to come inside and idk HOW they're getting inside#i hate living in a basement!!#i just want to sleep so i dont have to deal w being awake for a while fjdkls but now im all freaked out#i want to curl into a little ball and blink out of existence I'll be so honest rn. im just. idk.#✨ I don't think I have a place in society ✨ i am not a good enough person to exist in the world ✨#i dont want to go to sleep bc what if the spider comes back fjfkdl i wish i would've found it so i could've trapped it#and then let it outside tomorrow! i wouldnt have even killed it. the universe should've given me that one bc im so niceys#unfortunately the universe doesnt play nice w me fjfksl#spider tw
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