Tumgik
#so this will give her time to heal (physically) and be helped (mentally and emotionally) before actually moving on to a new adventure
thefreelanceangel · 5 months
Note
Mistake and Wound!
"...all she said was that she needed to say goodbye to a couple of people before heading to the New World."
Tumblr media
"Something about leaving a memento behind for two people she loved? I don't know, Michael, I can't read Meli's mind. She looked the same as always. Yes, that means mopey."
Tumblr media
"I'm sure we can ask how she's feeling when she comes back."
mistake: What's the worst mistake your OC ever made? What led to them making it? Have they been able to fix it? How have they moved on? / wound: How does your OC handle being wounded? Are their wounds mostly physical? Mental? Emotional? What's the worst wound your OC has ever experienced?
Meli feels her life as a Warrior of Light is just... a series of mistakes. Grave mistakes that lead to other people paying the cost. Every friend hurt is another failure on her part, another cut that digs in just... a little too deeply to ever really heal.
She managed it for quite a while, years even. Despite watching the man she loved die, Meli bit down on her pain, embraced her own darkness and forged ahead. Ignoring the gaping emptiness inside her that she'd felt briefly filled, she did what needed to be done.
And then she fell in love again.
Only this time, his death came at her hands.
A necessary evil. She grieved it. Continued grieving silently while celebrating victories with those who fought at her side. Racing from one crisis to another doesn't leave anyone much time to brood over the past.
Until the hurt is torn open again, ripped wide and scoured raw, by facing the long ago echo of what her soul, fragmented as it was, had been missing for centuries. Meli's heart broke beyond repair at that point, and when she finally trudged to the ends of the universe to save what was left...
She woke, alive, after that last battle with her own dark reflection, and wished desperately that she'd never opened her eyes. And yet, even then... Another crisis. Another battle. Another rush of adrenaline to stave off the crumbling weakness hollowing her out from within.
Meli needed those frantic moments to keep herself going. Not the heady joy of combat or exploration, not the burning flicker of hope that she nourished in others, but the pressure of an encroaching deadline, of a deadly trap about to be sprung.
Without them... All she could do was return the pearl earrings she'd treasured to the two men who'd made them meaningful. To the memory of her soul's ancient love, and to the grave of her living self's lost love.
And then seek solace in one last rush.
5 notes · View notes
helen-with-an-a · 4 months
Text
The Object that stood in the way of a World Cup pt. 5
Hi. So here is the last part of the official story, but I do want to do another part of some cute moments and things like that. Also thanks to @lyak12 for the big sister moments with Lucy ahaha. <3
Ona Batlle x Reader
Part 1 : Part 2 : Part 3 : Part 4 : Part 5 : Epilogue
Flashbacks are in italics
TW: Suggestiveness
Description: R returns to playing football
Word Count: 3.7k
Tumblr media
You didn’t have to send the letter. But you did. Sort of. You left in her cubby for her to see after practice. It was the last day before your first match back. It was the last match of the domestic league and you had been promised at least the final 10 minutes. Was it the best timing for something of that magnitude? Probably not. But you needed her to know how you felt before the summer breaks began, and she went off the Olympics.
You hadn’t been ignoring Ona like you were at the beginning of the season, but you weren’t friends either. You still remained in your separate friend groups, but you didn’t avoid her like the plague, and she had gradually left her little corner of the gym during sessions. You were still in love with her. That much was definite – you often stared at her during matches, allowing yourself to reminisce over your memories. But you wanted to do it properly, with full communication and honest answers. You decided that the letter was an olive branch; she could do with it as she pleased.
She could ignore it. That would hurt, but you would endure it.
She could acknowledge but reject you. That would be painful but survivable.
She could accept it. That thought made your heart happy.
Since That Day with Lucy and the time away to repair yourself, everyone could see how much better you were doing. You were laughing again, smiling brightly as Patri joked around, giggling at Pina for tripping over the cones, chatting softly to Esmee or chasing after Mapi as Ingrid shook her head. Lucy was happy that the bubbly girl she considered a little sister was returning.
That Day, she had taken you to her house and laid you in bed. You were exhausted – mentally, emotionally, physically – and so fragile. She couldn’t remember a time when she had seen you so small. She had called Keira; she was frightened by your outburst, disturbed by what you had told her and saddened to think you thought you couldn’t talk to her. Keira had done an excellent job in calming her - promising it wasn’t her fault and that she was there for you now, and that’s all that mattered. The pair had set up the guest bedroom for you to stay in as you got ready to go back to England. They had given the heads up to the Lionesses that you would be coming home for a while – Leah got the full story, but everyone was told that you weren’t doing ok and needed more support than they could give you at Barcelona.
Ona was also taking the months to heal. She was talking to a therapist that helped her regulate her emotions, particularly when she was scared. You could see the change. It was nothing drastic, nothing too noticeable, but you knew. She was working on herself, and that was all that you wanted. You still watched all of her games for Spain. You had promised her you would always support her, and you always would. You hadn’t watched the matches in person, but they were always on your TV – sometimes favouring watching her matches over the Lionesses.
“Ugh, I don’t want to go,” Ona complained as you packed her suitcase for her. She was lying on your bed with just a big T-shirt on. It was one of your old England training tops.
“Because of what happened last time?” You knew bringing it up was a risk, but you couldn’t help yourself. You wanted to protect her from everything bad in the world.
“I mean, yes, there’s that, but …” She looked a little embarrassed as she turned her head away from you. You reached over and gently grabbed her chin, forcing her to look you in the eye.
“But?” You raised an eyebrow.
“Te voy a extrañar.” You heart softened at her confession.
“Oni,” you cooed as you flopped on top of her. I’m going to miss you too—so much. But I will still be supporting you. I promise.” You littered kisses over her face, ignoring her squeals and laughter telling you to get off
“You’re playing on the 7th, right?” You breathed into her ear as you gently bit her earlobe
“Sí” She all but moaned out.
“Well, my match is on the 6th,” you drifted over to the other side of her neck. “So, I will be watching your game; I’ll always watch your games. Forever and ever.” You drifted down her body, pushing her t-shirt up as you went.
“Si us plau, fot-me,” she begged.
“I don’t speak Catalan, Oni.” You reminded her as you tugged off her shirt.
80 minutes into the last game of the season, your number flashed green on the screen held up by the 4th Official. This was it. All your hard work had finally paid off. Marta ran over to you and smacked your awaiting hands, using them to pull you into a brief hug. “Vamos, chica,” She whispered in your ear. You ran onto the pitch as the crowd clapped and cheered for you. You looked to where you knew some of the Lionesses sat; they had made the trip over to Spain to watch your debut. You knew it was in your mind, but you would swear on your life that their cheers were the loudest. This was your happy place, finally back on the pitch. You felt the final pieces of tension melt away. You were finally home. All the emotions of the past 18 months were forgotten. The heartbreak, heartache, anger, fear, and frustration were all gone in a moment as the ball fell to your feet. You always felt the most at peace on the pitch.
“Ok, listen up.” It was media day for United, something you had mixed feelings over. You always liked the video side of media day, but you hated the photos – you always felt so awkward doing them. “On videos, we have Toone and Russo, and Blundell and Galton. On photos, we have Ladd, Zelem, and Parris. On interviews, we have Turner and Williams, Batlle and Y/S/N …” You stopped listening. Thank god you didn’t have to do photos straight away. And you were with Oni – sure, it would fuel the flame about whatever you were for the fans. But you were with Oni.
“Vamos, amor. We’ve got an interview to do.” Ona tangled her fingers with yours and pulled you over to the interview station.
“It’s pretty simple, introduce yourself, then just read the cards and answer them. We’re already rolling, so just start whenever you’re ready.” A man said from behind the camera. You looked at Ona for confirmation before introducing yourself. It was simple. The questions were nothing you hadn’t seen or answered before.
“Ok, amor, what is your happy place?” Ona read from the card.
“Hmm … lemme think ... um, is it cliché to say the football pitch?” You laughed, looking at Ona as she rested her head on your shoulder, groaning at your answer. “What? It is. It’s always been the place that calms me down. I don’t really get nervous on the pitch either, even for important games. Beforehand, I’ll be absolutely bricking it, but on the pitch … cool as a cucumber.”
“Bricking … it?” Your phrasing confused her. You always forget that she was speaking her non-native language; she was so fluent in English now.
“Oh, um … nervous, I guess? Oni, you know how I get before games, especially the big ones, but I'm absolutely fine once that whistle goes.”
“I do know how nervous you get. Do you remember our game at the Arnold Clark Cup? You were so nervous. Leah had to come get me before the match.” She smiled teasingly at you.
“Stop,” you whined. You said you’d take that to the grave.” You didn’t like people knowing how panicky you could get. You also didn't particularly want to spill how Ona had gotten you to calm down —she had kissed you—long and hard and deep. It had calmed you down instantly.
They say that history repeats itself, and you think they might be onto something. Your team was finishing the domestic season in typical Barca fashion. You were 8-0 up with 10 minutes still to play. You set a pass to Lucy as you began to push forward. It was a perfect cross back from Ona as you entered the penalty area. You controlled it with your chest to the ground. You swung your leg back. This time, there was no clash of studs. No horrific pain. No blood. This time, you released the ball into the back of the net.
You didn’t care what you looked like as you ran around like a headless chicken. You may have looked silly celebrating this hard for the ninth goal of the game, but you didn’t care. You were back. You leapt onto Ona, legs wrapping around her waist as her arms came to support you under your thighs.
“Estás de Vuelta, amor,” she shouted. With that response alone, you knew she had read the letter.
“I’m back, Oni,” you laughed as she put you down and straight into the arms of Lucy and the rest of the team.
The match ended 9-0. The match had been won long before that, but everyone assured you you got the winner. Medals were handed out as you cheered with the rest of the squad, music blasted, and shouts were heard from all around. You didn’t bother looking for your parents; you knew they weren’t there. But you did see the smiling faces of Alessia, Ella and Leah, with Mary and Georgia on Facetime. After promises to find them later you found a relatively quiet corner in the tunnel and allowed yourself to fully process your feelings. Elation. Happiness. Love. Everything was so different compared to this time last year.
Someone cleared their throat, drawing your attention to them. It was Ona. “Um … can we talk?”
“Yeh, yeh. Do you want to sit?” You gestured to the floor against the wall. You both got comfortable and sat for a few heartbeats.
“Felicidades … your goal, it was beautiful.” She was clearly a little awkward.
“Oni, the letter –” you started
“I’m sorry. I’m so, so, so sorry for what I did to you. I was looking for a fight. I was terrified you’d leave me behind. And I was jealous Barca wanted you. There will never be a day where I don’t regret what I did to you, and I hate myself for it. For hurting you so badly. You didn’t deserve any of what happened. I was a raging bitch, and I was so awful to you, and -” She gushed out.
“Oni, stop,” you said gently. "It’s ok. I forgive you. You need to start forgiving yourself, too.” You rested your head on her shoulder. You did forgive her. She had done a horrible thing, but she wasn’t a horrible person. She leaned her head on top of yours, enjoying the closeness she had craved for so long.
“Did you mean it?” she said after a long pause. Her voice was fearful that you might reject her—which was perfectly within your rights, she reminded herself. “That you’re still in love with me?”
“Yes. I am still absolutely head-over-heels in love with you. I never stopped," you answered honestly. "But if we are to try again, we’re going to need to be friends first. So, I’m reintroducing myself to you.” You stuck out your hand. “Hola, I’m Y/N," you repeated the words you said to her so long ago back in Manchester when you first met.
“Hola, soy Ona.” She laughed as she shook your hand, letting it linger for longer than she should have. Her hand was warm, rough, soft, and perfect.
"Got any nicknames?" Her lips split into that beautiful wide grin. Your smile matched hers.
“Um, hola.” You said as you stood in front of her cubby.
“Hola?” She was sceptical of you. Not many people had made an effort to talk to her, let alone talk to her in Spanish. It was the end of her third day at United, and she was homesick and terrified about whether she had done the right thing.
“So, I overheard you in the lunchroom earlier about Spanish food being so different from English food, and I was going to make paella for my tea tonight anyways, so I was wondering if you wanted to come round? I can’t promise it will be any good; the recipe I’m supposed to be following says it's ‘Spanish Rice’, not even paella, but … yeh.” God, you were so awkward; you hadn’t even let her answer the question. “You don’t have to if you don’t want to. You probably have plans. So … anyways … I’m gonna now,” you went to turn around before her fingers caught your wrist.
“You didn’t let me answer” She smiled. Your heart fluttered in a strange way. Were you having a heart attack because a pretty girl smiled at you?
“What is tea? I thought it was a drink.” She asked. Oh, god – that voice. You thought you had died and gone to heaven.
“Tea? … oh, yeh. Sorry, I forgot I’m northern,” you laughed. “It’s how you say dinner if you’re northern. Um, I think it’s ‘cena’ in Spanish?”
“Ah, sí, sí. Yes, I shall come for tea.” She giggled. You knew you had just fallen in love right then and there.
Ona was slightly nervous as she knocked on your flat door. A pretty girl had asked her to come round. She wasn’t used to this; she was usually confident, always knowing who and what she wanted. But you had surprised her with your gentle smile, quick ramblings, and soft laugh; you had stolen her heart and didn’t even know it.
“Hey, sorry to leave you hanging.” You said as you answered the door. Your expression confused her, but she ignored it as you ushered her into your flat. It was exactly how she expected, a perfect physical representation of you. She never wanted to leave.
“Ok, so I’ve already cooked it, so it’s ready when you are, really. I don’t particularly like seafood, so it’s chicken and chorizo. I know that Barcelona is famous for its seafood. And there are peppers and peas in there, too. I hope that’s okay,” you said as you gestured for her to sit at the table.
“Sounds deliciosa,” she commented, looking around. Your flat was clean, neat, and tidy, but not to the point that it looked like no one lived there. You had a lot of pictures of friends dotted around, but it didn’t seem like many of your family. You clearly took pride in your home. Ona could respect that. She always thought that you could tell a lot about someone based on how they decorate and treat a space.
“Here you go,” you said as you handed her a bowl of steaming rice. “So … this might come across as rude or something, and I really don’t want that, but … um, how do I ask this? How, um … howdoyousayyourname?” You said it so quickly it was a blur. Ona clearly didn’t understand you.
“Qué?”
“Um … how do you say your last name?” You asked sheepishly. “I want to get it right. It’s important to me that I say people’s names right,” you explained. Her heart melted at your kind gesture.
“Oh, um, it’s like bat-jyay.”
“Batlle,” you said slowly. “Batlle,” you said quicker, reassurance in her accompanying smile.
“Cool … now that that’s out of the way, do you have any nicknames or anything?” It was clear to Ona that you were trying to get her to feel more comfortable around you.
“Um … not really. It’s common in Spain to add 'ita' at the end of words, so sometimes Onita? Or Oni, I guess?”
“Oni, I like it.” The nickname rolled off your tongue so effortlessly that Ona swooned.
“What about you, any nicknames?”
“Oh, no, not really. I mean beyond the standard English love, or darling, or pet, or duck or anything really,” you laughed.
“Well, I won’t call you love. But I will call your amor, sí?” Your heart was doing backflips as you looked down at the table, hiding your blush.
The summer that followed was unforgettable. You hadn’t had a summer off since … you couldn’t remember when. You and Ona had used the few weeks before she left for camp to reacquaint yourself. There were lots of laughs shared over coffees and slightly too-long hugs. It was easy to fall back in love with her and rediscover your dynamic.
You didn’t go to Paris, no matter how much you wanted to see her. You watched every game, though, sending her a steady stream of your consciousness through text. You knew she couldn’t see them when she was playing, but you wanted her to know you supported her like you had promised to do all those years ago. Ona adored the fact that she would look at her phone after the match to hundreds of messages, reading every one as she chuckled at your play-by-play.
She didn’t attend preseason, but you did, obviously. You used the time to add the final touches to your new style of play. You were ready to prove to the world that you were back and better than ever. You had seen some comments on social media speculating about your return. But you knew you were ready. When Ona returned, you lingered behind the group who swarmed the Olympians. She had quickly extricated herself and came to join you. “Congratulations, Oni. I’m very proud of you,” You said as you hugged her tightly, dropping a series of light kisses on her head.
The final Friday before the season officially started was full of drinks and laughter. You had one final blowout before settling in for the next season, and naturally, you ended up at Manuela’s.
“You did good, kid,” Lucy said as she wrapped an arm around your shoulders. You were at the bar, sipping on a fruity drink.
“Thanks, Luce. For everything. I know I didn’t exactly make it easy on you, but …”
“Hey, no, don’t do that. You were in a bad place. I didn’t do it because I needed to; I did it because I wanted to. You’re like my little sister. I love you more than I love my actual little sister.” She promised you.
“I know, but still. Thank you. I appreciate you, truly.” You rested your head against her shoulder as she squeezed you gently.
“Y/N,” Someone called for your attention. It was an incredibly drunk Patri. “Ven a bailar, chica.” You made your way over to the group; almost everyone was incredibly drunk; even Alexia had the tell-tale flush on her cheeks, but that could have been more to do with Olga dancing in front of her than the alcohol. The only people that you think weren’t drunk were you and Ona.
“You’re not drinking?” You asked as she came to stand next to you.
“Not really, don’t want to be hungover tomorrow,” she answered. “What about you?”
“Same. This is probably the only drink I’ll have.” Your therapist had advised you to stay away from drinking as much as possible, telling you that it could affect you in negative ways. You didn’t really mind; you liked being able to remember everyone’s drunk antics. It was useful for blackmail purposes, and at least one other person remained sober during nights out anyway.
You spent the night splitting yourself between the dancefloor with Patri and Pina, the booth with Ingrid and Mapi, or the table Marta and Caroline had claimed. It was fun, but you forgot how hot Barcelona nights out could be, even in the late summer, when the temperature rarely dipped below mid-teens. It was hot and loud, and sweaty. To escape, you pushed your way outside, taking deep breaths of the fresh night air.
“Esta todo bien, amor?” It was Ona.
“Always so concerned, Oni.” You laughed.
“Lo siento. It’s just, I saw you leave … and I wanted to check on you and …” She was starting to panic, thinking she was overstepping a boundary.
“Hey, Oni. It’s ok. I like that you're so concerned about me.” You reached for her hand, holding it tightly to reassure her. “I keep forgetting how hot Barcelona can be,” you explained. "I’m still not used to it.” She laughed lightly.
“You’ll have to get used to it. I don’t want you to leave Barcelona” she trailed off, “because of the weather” she added quickly.
“I don’t want to leave Barcelona either … especially because of the weather,” you teased.
“Callate,” She groaned as you tugged her closer, arm going around her shoulder as hers came around your waist. “I like your outfit.” She murmured as she played with the lace on the bottom of your bralette. “It’s the same one you wore in Manchester the first time we…” she whispered, trailing off again. You knew exactly what she was referring to.
“Do you want to go dance?” You asked after a few minutes of soaking up her closeness.
“Sí, vamos.” She led you back to the dancefloor, her back coming against your front as you held her close. It felt like the most normal thing to press your body closer. It felt right as she turned around to face you, her arms looping around your neck. It felt normal as your eyes flicked from hers to her lips and back again. The way your heart pounded felt nice when she stepped even closer, somehow managing to pull herself even more against you. Like always, the way the world slid sideways as your lips pressed against hers. It felt like the most natural thing in the world.
“Vull això. ens vull. Si us plau, porta'm a casa.”
“I still don’t speak Catalan, Oni.”
Yeh, so that's the end of the proper story, but I want to do an epilogue/final chapter thing about cute moments between R and Ona and stuff. So, yeh. I hope you enjoyed it.
227 notes · View notes
jenflirts · 7 months
Text
mending my broken heart
Tumblr media Tumblr media Tumblr media
pairing: tara carpenter x fem!reader
theme: angst :)
summary: maybe you're the one...
warning: profanities, grammar, no ghostface and cheating
a/n: based on my feelings :) | enjoy.
Tumblr media
Falling for someone isn’t for weak people,
Nor being attached,
Nor loving someone.
These are the feelings that will make you mentally and physically weak, just because you would do everything just to have them, just to give them all your attention, love, and hell, even your soul, but why isn’t it for the weak? Well, only emotionally controlled people can survive these challenges. These are the obstacles that we face when we’re in love and this makes us vulnerable.
We’ve always thought that if a partner loves or falls for you it means they’ve accepted your flaws, insecurities, clinginess, stupidity, good days and bad ones, but sometimes don’t you think that they accepted that because they needed too? Out of pity? Or sometimes just to play you cause they’re just bored. I’ve always thought about falling in love and being vulnerable to a person, but then my overthinking mind stops me from doing so.
Yeah, taking from my perspective—a person that’s been played and got attached too many times just because they showed affection—I’ve been hurt so much that I don’t even count how many times that they scarred my heart and still gave them another chance. I did everything I could just not to fall for someone, but I just can’t stop myself ‘cause it feels like an addiction I cannot control. I keep thinking about the past relationships I had and even thought about the times that I let my heart heal and mend it by myself and yet, I keep longing for the wrong people and their fucked up affections.
And then there’s Tara, the girl that makes me feel special, the person that let me believe that love is worth waiting for, and love really does exist. Tara is the type of person that would really make you fall in love with her and not in the bad way, but because she’s the type of girl that you’ll feel comfortable to be around with, rides with your antics, will help you in any possible way, and makes you love your true self.
Tara and I have been dating for almost 2 years and the truth is I’ve fallen deeply in love with her, she already accepted my vulnerability and I accepted hers so there’s really no turning back. I’ve thought about these feelings thoroughly ‘cause I don’t want to hurt her nor she wants to hurt me, I’ve always wanted to feel vulnerable around someone I trust and love the most ‘cause I don’t want to let people see my true facade. Tara saw something in me that people don’t and she’s been helping me to cope up with that.
Everything has been great ever since I dated Tara.
December 09
It's our finals and both of us are stressed out since both of us picked a hard course and I actually want to do something special for her since it’s our anniversary so I’ve prepared dinner, movies and gifts just to surprise her. I went home earlier than she did so I could prepare the things I wanted to give and the words that I wanted to say; Thankfully, Sam and Mindy helped me to do everything.
“Minds? Do you think Tara would like it if I gave her a promise ring on our anniversary?” I asked the girl as we strolled through the jewelry shop. She stopped her tracks and looked at me surprised “A promise ring? Really? Doesn’t that curse relationships?” She asked as she glimpsed the rings.
A promise ring breaks relationships? Now what kind of fuck-mind would believe that. “And where did you get that information? Is it one of those crazies at the uni?” I joked.
“I’m just telling you that rings don't mean forever,” she said. That’s actually true, but I’m not gonna listen to her and Tara deserves a promise that I will love her forever so I picked out the ring and necklace for our anniversary tomorrow.
I helped Tara go inside our apartment and took the blindfold off. She engulfed me into a hug and kisses all over my face. "Tara, we need to eat" I said as I put her down on the floor.
Everything went smoothly and both ended with a promise to love and hold forever.
December 14
The day that feels eerie and gut wrenching, it feels so slow and bothering. "Minds, Tara hasn't texted me for the last few weeks and it's concerning me" I said as I tossed her my phone to check Tara and I's conversation.
"She also hasn't been going home" I added and groaned loudly.
"Yeah, I noticed that. You didn't confront her about this? But I always see her at the uni tho" She said.
Is Tara avoiding me? Did I do something wrong last week? Did she do something wrong? Did something happen that I didn't know? A lot of things suddenly hits me, I thought about everything that I've done last week ago, but nothing really came into my mind.
It's already past midnight and I'm still going on about Tara. I heard the door open and keys tossed on the counter. I went outside and checked if Tara's here or just Mindy wanted to crash by.
"Tara? Baby? Where were you?" I asked as I sat beside her on the living room coach.
"Sam's and did some thinking, so can we talk?" she said.
Why does it feel so suffocating? The way she looks at me feels so different; it feels empty and drained. I nodded and sat in front of her.
"For the last few weeks I've been isolating myself to you and it felt different after what I did. It's been perfect for the last 2 years and I loved every single moment that we've done, but I think we must part our ways and fix ourselves" She cried.
What? Just like that? After 2 fucking years? She's just going to throw it all away? I was too stunned to speak, my brain was spewing out words, but my mouth can't function properly. I felt my eyes stung and tears rolled down on my cheeks.
"So? That's it? Gonna throw away our 2 year relationship out the fucking window like its nothing? Damn Tara, I don't know what to say nor to react" I said as I wiped the tears that keep continuing running down on my cheeks.
She doesn't say anything, but her eyes tells me differently like she's guilty for not telling me the reason why.
"Tara, what's the sudden break-up? what's the reason? 'cause I know for a goddamn fact that it's not about self improvement shits. Tell me so that we could fix it" I assured her
She shook her head no and keeps sobbing uncontrollably. I went to her and wiped her tears; I held her hands, "Love? what happened? tell me so we could fix it" I said as I gently squeeze her hand.
She slowly stopped crying and let me wiped her mascara tear-stains. "It was at Wes's parties and you were studying for your final lesson at that time. Amber snuck me out and helped me unwind by bring me to Wes's parties then I got drunk and I couldn't control myself and so did Chad" she explained.
I couldn't believe it.
The love of my life, cheated.
The girl that I trusted the most, cheated.
I felt my whole world fell apart. It feels like my heart just shuttered into pieces, it feels like there's a new cut to it. I feel betrayed, angry and disappointed all at the same time.
I stood up and went back to my seat and comprehend what just Tara said. I can't do this right now, my mind is all over the place.
"babe? hey? I thought we were gonna fix these" she said
does she really think there's something to be fix? I gave her my everything and this is how she repays me. cheating on me with my other best friend? damn, that's another form of betrayal.
"tara, get out. I can't right now. I just want to be alone for a moment"
She doesn't understand what pain I'm going through right now.
After Tara closed the apartment door, I tried smashing everything so that I could somewhat calm down.
I sat on the living room floor and thought about the things that I have done on why Tara have to do this. Wasn't I enough? Am I that easy to replace? Is our relationship just out of pity? There's so much unanswered questions that I have on my mind, but right now I just want to be alone and mend my broken heart.
I thought she was the one that’s going to help me mend up the open cuts that people leave on my heart, but I would never predict that she was going to leave a big one.
Tumblr media
(part 2 of my lovely, jenna is on-going)
339 notes · View notes
xuhuihuis · 1 year
Text
All Too Well | Jeon Wonwoo
Tumblr media
warnings: angst, asshole wonwoo, cheating?, bestie mingyu, swearing
The kitchen was filled with silence, nothing could be heard but the repetition of the clock on the wall clicking away as your foot tapped on the cold title. You were struggling to sleep tossing and turning trying any way to sleep but it wasn’t working. Even counting sheep didn’t help you. Thinking about Wonwoo ever since you saw him with his arm around another woman as you were coming home from work. His tall stature leaned over her protecting her from anything that could hurt her in any way. Reminding you of how he did that for you when you were dating for the six years, those six years filled with happiness and joy. Now your whole world was dark and damp with nothing giving you joy you had when you were dating Wonwoo. 
Going out to the places Wonwoo took you on dates trying to heal that part of your soul that got left that day he broke up with you. It was the worst break up you have ever had to go through in your life shedding floods of tears that night breaking your heart crying not understanding a word he said to you after he broke the news to you. Wonwoo’s harsh words stabbing you in the heart like a knife stabbing your heart deeply making you bleed tears in return. Leaving his house that night leaving your happiness and a little part of your soul there too.
Rubbing your eyes snapping yourself back into reality before you start crying when you really should be sleeping as you do have work in the morning which you weren’t mentally ready for. Seeing Wonwoo at the office and having to put on a fake smile like in the relationship to get you through the day emotionally. Getting up from your seat on the barstool walking over to the cupboard reaching into the back to get a glass but pulling out the one glass he got you for your first anniversary together. The lipstick marks are still on the rim of the glass filling your head with unwanted memories for the early hours of the morning but your body is not letting them go as you really thought Wonwoo was the man you thought you were going to marry. 
As you were filling the glass up you saw your car keys on the side of the counter that had fallen out of your hand bag. The keys reminded you of all of the late night drives with Wonwoo, taking you out to anywhere with no plan in mind. Wonwoo always had the playlist he made for you in the background as he took you down the winding roads to nowhere. His large hand resting on your thigh whilst his main attention was on the road in front of him.  A shock of pure joy shooting through your veins as the beat of the song started. Both of you singing all the wrong words at the top of your lungs not having a care in the world and if someone came and judged you that never stopped you enjoying the small moments like this with Wonwoo.
It hurt you to know that he was now doing all of this with another woman….
Trying to go on other dates after Wonwoo felt like a stab to the heart, something worse than rubbing salt in the wound after you hurt yourself. No one compared to Wonwoo emotionally or physically as he really was your lover. You miss seeing the way his glasses lay on the bedside table in the mornings when he slept in and the used mug with the remnants of the coffee still in the bottom of the cup. It was the small things that made you love him even more, never taking the time to appreciate these things when you were in the whirlwind of the relationship before he whisked you off to your fantasy land. 
Being so young and oblivious you didn’t know he was talking to someone else behind your back when you went to sleep. He gave you a goodnight kiss and left you in dreamland before he went to sit in his home office to ‘work’ but he was really talking to someone he met on the internet. She was tall, dark and beautiful, everything you weren’t…
This dark horse was the dream woman that Wonwoo really wanted to marry. Both of them spent hours talking right in front of your face but you trusted him when he said that he was talking to a ‘friend from school’ but it was a snake personified. 
Messaging back and forth with you thinking it was his best friend from school that he hasn’t talked to in years. Wonwoo thought you were so cute for thinking this for the whole two years you didn’t know about her. Letting you go away for the weekend to relax on the beach where you had your first kiss while he has his dirty hands all over another woman. Leaving her scent all over the house that was a haven to you and Wonwoo it was your forever home with your supposed knight in shining armour. 
Entering the bedroom after the long drive back from the beach to lay on the bed still covered in her sickening perfume. It felt like the whole world stopped when you inhaled the disgusting scent from the sheets for the first time. All the blood in your body stopped as it hit you that the man you had adored all these years has been sleeping with another woman. You could feel the fury light up in your veins as it hit you that he was sleeping with while you had no idea. 
You were oblivious to the situation…
It pissed you off that he took advantage of you being away to get her into the house and sleep in the same bed where you both slept at night and made love to each other. But now he’s doing all these things with another woman when he’s the only one that was your light in the darkest times but now he’s ruined it. The makeup on your face was melting off as the tears rolled down your cheeks leaving tear stains in their trail. Getting up from the bed looking into the mirror next to you seeing the mess of your hair and makeup really did show your feelings. You were a mess.
Wonwoo was nowhere to be seen in the house, he was probably all over this new girl while you were pulling your heart out over him. He was. In her bed snuggled up with her basking in each other's presence playing with her hair watching whatever channel was left on the TV last only caring about making each other laugh and not what's going on around them. Wonwoo’s lips were covered by her lipstick and his neck was covered in red and purple bruises from the night before. That was the one thing he never gave you permission to do, leave marks on his neck. Always making some excuse that he wasn't allowed them as his work would freak out but this new girl could claim him as hers all she wanted to.
Picking up your phone to ask Mingyu if you could come over and of course he said yes when he heard the way your voice was cracking. Mingyu was the only real friend you have had since you were young, making him know everything about you. He has been sceptical about Wonwoo from the first day you introduced them to each other in the college cafe. The looks they both gave one another was enough to tell you that they didn’t like each other at all…
Mingyu was an intimidating guy at first with his tall stature and his strong build, it’s enough to put people off him making people appear timid towards him when he really is puppy like under all his muscle. Wonwoo was the opposite of Mingyu, he was quiet and kept to himself but they met each other in height so it made it easier to give dirty looks to one another behind your back.
Picking your keys out of the dish on the counter before heading out of the door to spend the night with Mingyu not caring about the way you looked around him one bit. Locking the door behind you running to your car not wanting to get wet because of the rain. It wasn’t a long drive at all letting out a sigh of relief pulling into his driveway trying your best wiping your tears away before locking your car and knocking on his door waiting for him to answer. 
The tall man opened the door and was greeted by the sight of your melted makeup and wet clothes getting you inside as quickly as he could. Mingyu looked too good in your eyes even when he is dressed like he is now, black tank top and sweats with his glasses resting on the top of his pushing his hair back out of his flawless face. It was obvious that you were jealous about how gorgeous his skin was without trying hard. Sitting down on the couch watching the soccer game he left on the TV before you arrived before Mingyu went and looked for spare clothes for you to change into. 
“Sorry this is all I have for you…”
The man apologised but it was the least he could do making sure you don’t catch a cold staying in your damp clothes. His attention diverted back to the screen of the TV as his soccer team score erupting in cheers and a beaming smile almost losing his glasses from excitement. Both of you laugh the moment off as you sneak off to the bathroom getting changed into the clean clothes while he sat and watched the game hearing cheers once in a while.
Mingyu's shirt was that large on you it didn't fit you the best but it made it more comfortable to wear and it still had the strong smell of his cologne through the fabric. Double checking you looked acceptable before going back out into the living room throwing your clothes in his washer before sitting on the couch with him. Mingyu held his arms open for you to sit by his side giving you the comfort in a time like this where you need it most. His strong vanilla scent filled your nostrils as you snuggled closer to him as he was engaged in the soccer game in front of him.
No words had to be said between you both to know you are loved, Mingyu just wanted to give you the space and the time to recover from the heartbreak without having someone barging in on you and your feelings. Wonwoo was the one guy Mingyu never trusted with you alone when you were at parties or out in public together even if he was your boyfriend at the time. It wasn’t until he looked down he saw the wet patch on his tank top and the tears rolling down your cheeks slowly finding it hard to hold back the tears any longer. 
Mingyu pulled you into his lap to hold you in the vulnerable moment turning the TV off paying his full attention to you. His warm puppy eyes met your tear filled ones with a pout in his face as he felt bad that he could do nothing to help you in this situation but be there for you. A large hand cupped your cheek running his calloused thumb over the apple of your damp cheek. 
“I've got you angel. I’m here for you”
Something changed in the air the longer the both of you sat in a comfortable silence looking into eachothers eyes. You could feel the butterflies in your stomach doing your best trying to ignore them but the feeling was only getting stronger over time. Eyes darting from his eyes down to his chapped lips fighting the urge to kiss him and get lost in him and his body. Taking your chances moving in closer to him feeling the tension in the air get thicker the closer you get to his face. Mingyu was that close you could feel his warm breath fan over your face smirking at how small you looked on his lap. 
Fuck it you thought leaning in kissing him on the lips gently pulling away before he could react. All the muscles in Mingyu’s body stopped working for a moment feeling your soft lips against his realising that everything going on was real to him and was actually happening. Kissing back resting his hands in the back of your neck never wanting this moment to end. 
It was all you could ask for after the day you have had…
170 notes · View notes
sailorgundam308 · 4 months
Text
Being the angst sucker that I am (but also a coward that doesn’t want to feel too depressed about bad endings), I headcanon a lot about the dynamics and end/post game canons for Astarion and Karlach as a couple (no shit!).
I know a lot of people ship Karlach with Dammon. I obviously don’t, but not because I think they don’t fit well together or whatever. I have this thing in my head of how I view Karlach which puts her relationship with Astarion as more realistic, more fulfilling, and more attractive to me (duh).
Dammon as a character is a nice, hard working guy. He’s also crazy handsome, has the hots for Karlach and some mechanics knowledge to be able to help her a bit. So yea, cool. I like him a lot so that’s not it.
BUT.
Just gonna blurt it out: I think Karlach is too fucked up to be with him in the canon universe we have. It’s a similar reason I have for how I see her reaction to the love test in the Circus in Act 3, which I made a post about. Had Karlach never been betrayed by Gortash, had not been irreversibly damaged (in more ways than one) and not been transformed by her 10 years ordeal, Dammon would be the ‘perfect pairing’ for her - a gentle, good hearted, generous and hot piece of ass. Thumbs up.
HOWEVER.
She’s not that girl anymore. She keeps it bottled up, pushes it down and shuts herself to what her trauma did to her and while it’s commendable, imo, it’s not real. She wants it to be so bad because she’s got so little time and is desperately clinging to her life before she started making mistakes (now being back in the Material Plane after so long). If she doesn’t die, though, she won’t keep this up forever. She’s carrying pain, remorse, ANGER, jealousy, self pity. A LOT of it. Much more than she let out in her post-Gortash breakdown. All these are very human emotions, and very understandable in her situation. She also changed, physically, mentally, emotionally. She grew, she learned- and it wasn’t all pretty and nice things. I like the idea that she’s being the most genuine character in the game while ALSO being the one wearing the most impenetrable mask. It’s wild and damn cool to see her through that lens.
Which brings me to Astarion.
He is also wearing a mask, but a much more frail one. He’s cracked. He tells and shows us these ugly emotions, his selfishness and hurt, much more directly than Karlach does. He’s broken, wicked, mean. It’s clear his trauma completely changed him (though I don’t think he was a good guy before it either), and is entrenched into who he is when we meet him - and will continue to be part of him even after he heals.
I think Karlach is attracted to him not in spite of how mean he is - but because of it. I don’t think she’s aware of it, though. She says something about Astarion having a good heart beneath it all - and while he might have something like a better heart inside that can be rescued, he’s not inherently good, nor he was before being turned (nor he wants to be). The dynamic of Karlach using goodness and positivity as a lifeline, as if to counter the decade of (literally) pure evil she’s been forced to endure, while also ‘surprisingly’ getting along so well with Astarion from the start, also being attracted to his wickedness, gives an incredible depth to their relationship. I see not only the idea of Karlach’s kindness, non-judgement and patience being a refuge for Astarion, but Astarion’s grey personality being a refuge where Karlach will be able to let her walls down - show the ugliness bottled up inside - without fear or shame, and knowing it will be completely and utterly understood. Astarion will never judge her for whatever impulses or thoughts she might have, for displays of selfishness, jealousy or violence. Imo, they can even work some of those out together (wink wink, but not only in that way lol). At the same time, I do believe Astarion saw from the first glance he had at Karlach (or in the first couple of days) that she carried a pain much like his. It’s why he respects her, why he is so quick to apologize to her and only to her, why he feels empathy for her suffering while being absolutely cold to the others. She’s the first one who gives him the opportunity of allowing himself to feel safe, to let his guard down if only for a night. His connection with her might be based on a selfish start (it’s about him - she is like him), but it grows to be more complex as they grow closer. I see him slowly falling in love with her as a parallel to him slowly learning to love himself, to forgive himself.
It’s all so beautiful, poetic and layered and shit (wow, me so eloquent).
But in all honesty, that’s all to say, while I think Karlach and Dammon look nice together, I see him as being the person who’d have been the one for her if she was just Karlach Cliffgate. However, she is not. She is Karlach Cliffgate and she is also Karlach Demonsbane - and for that ‘her’, Astarion - with his imperfections, his wicked ways and his darkness - is the one who truly fits her perfectly (or imperfectly, which imo is even better).
Thank you for reading all this rambling. I love rambling and will (can) never stop so good for you :V
AGH I LOVE bittersweet gritty messy romanceeeeeeee (but I wanna give them a better ending than the one in game - though if the patches weren’t broken, it’s improved a bit already)
49 notes · View notes
starguardianniom · 9 months
Text
The Paris Special and Cataclysm
So the special happened right after Destruction ended, so right after Monarch deliberately made Chat Noir use Cataclysm on him so Ladybug could not longer have any leverage on him and escape with the Lucky Charm, dooming himself.
A bit later the same night Claw Noir, while fighting Chat Noir, Cataclysm himself and doesn't seem bothered after letting out a scream. Or the physical pain doesn't even reach the level of emotional pain he feels during that time, who knows.
So Chat Noir has his own father and an evil alternate version of himself who literally had him hurt themselves and he's horrified.
They are willing to hurt each other if it means they can win in the long run, showing their goals have past reached their own wellbeing. It just shows how unhealthy they are mentally and how it poisons their minds.
Cataclysm here seems to be the symbolism of their destructive grief and negative emotions, they let it consume and hurt themselves rather than trying to heal and move on. And grief can literally kill you, dying of a broken heart is a real thing, and I feel that in the special it showed us the 2 possible outcomes of it.
Negative emotions can lead you to spiral that can end with you also destroying yourself emotionally and physically, though I don't feel like I need to go into details, I feel the special kind of showed some ideas well enough.
In the first one outcome, which would be Gabriel since he got Cataclysmed first before Betterfly, Shadybug and Claw Noir showed up, Gabriel never let go of his grief and negative emotions, doesn't want to move on from Émilie and wants to bring her back no matter what, that's the outcome of letting grief and negative emotions consume you entirely.
The second outcome is Claw Noir not minding to get Cataclysmed himself and keeps using his power all the time, but in the end after a talk with Adrien, he choose to let it go and finally start to heal rather than stewing in his bitterness, sadness and loneliness and the all consuming, numbing pain of grief and all the dark emotions that comes with it. Of course he still has work ahead of himself, but he did the first most important step, and it was to accept that his mother was gone and would have prefered him to be happy rather than being miserable and mourning her loss for the rest of his life, and sure you can keep mourning your loved ones, but it doesn't mean that you can't learn to live with it and move on and be happy yourself, they still stay with you in your heart, and they would want you to live a long and happy life even if they're aren't around anymore.
I think this is why in the end (apart from the other reason of plot device since we still had the rest of season 5 to go through) Claw Noir got healed from his Cataclysm wound by Shadybug's Miraculous Cure, whereas Monach wasn't, because Claw Noir was ready to let go of his grief, Monarch wasn't, so Claw Noir got healed cause he wanted to stop hurting over his mother's disappearance after a talk with his alternate self who completely understood his feelings and situation and told him his own experience and offered advice that helped him be in a much better mental state that he was, but Monarch didn't want to give up on Émilie after getting most of the miraculouses after he feels so close after all this time so he wasn't healed because he couldn't let go, as he is obsessed over Émilie and his goal.
Which brings to their fate, Claw Noir lives, while Monarch at the end of season 5, dies, well choose to die and join Émilie and fix Nathalie rather than facing the consequences of his actions more would be it, getting what he wanted and also not entirely, given he was supposed to bring Émilie back and sacrifice someone else so that they could be a happy family again, but instead he chose to orphanate Adrien and be with Émilie and have Nathalie guard Adrien at the last second, he's still a horrible excuse of a parent and while I'm beyond pissed at this ending I'm also beyond done watching him do anymore crap for the following seasons.
So in the Paris Special there was the lowkey message of either you let your grief and negative emotions destroy you or you choose to accept them and start moving on to heal, and it was symbolised by Cataclysm.
It doesn't mean you aren't allowed to feel grief or negative emotions, you can't be happy 24/7 for your entire life, but letting them out in a healthy way instead of stewing in them without letting them go is what I feel the Special was about.
Thoughts?
Feel free to add your own piece of interpretation to it too.
100 notes · View notes
saturnrin · 9 months
Text
The miraculous affecting their users outside transformation is one of my favorite concepts because it has so much potential.
For my sake, I'm going to use the ladybug miraculous as the sole example in this post. Otherwise, I'd never shut up.
The ladybug miraculous is the miraculous of creation, good luck, order, and ladybugs (duh).
Maybe the ladybug miraculous gives its user extreme good luck outside transformation.
Or, it could do the opposite; give the holder bad luck outside transformation for cosmic balance or whatever.
As the miraculous of creation, it's not hard to imagine that living beings (plants and animals specifically) would feel pulled towards its holder. Not entirely dissimilar to the way sunflowers follow the sun's light.
The holders could also gain creation magic, if you'd like. The ability to simply create whatever they'd like out of thin air. (This can include the ability to create pocket dimensions.)
Healing magic is also not-farfetched as the ladybug is used to heal injuries and revive thousands of people almost daily in the miraculous universe.
✧・゚: *✧・゚:* *:・゚✧*:・゚✧
Developing traits of a ladybug is also an option;
• Maybe the holder has thicker skin than the average person, a mimicry of a ladybugs protective shell. (Harder to bruise, takes more to break through the skin, etc.)
• Or maybe they're more susceptible to the cold (not a positive aspect, but it's good for angst, i suppose).
• a newly found fondness for flowers, nature, and sweet fruit (like strawberries)
• Ladybugs hibernate, so an increased need for sleep could be possible?
• An increased diet, as ladybugs are considered insatiable.
• you could toy with the idea of vitiligo/skin discoloration as a mimicry of a ladybugs warning spots.
• toxic blood is also a really cool idea for a ladybug-like trait.
• ladybugs secrete a pheromone to deter predators when scared or threatened. This could also be a trait the ladybug holder could inherit.
Or maybe ladybugs just regularly land on the users of this miraculous.
The side effects could be so cool! Or inconvenient! Or debilitating! Or they could be completely and totally underwhelming.
Or there could be no side effects, but where's the fun in that?
✧・゚: *✧・゚:* *:・゚✧*:・゚✧
The Miraculi don't just affect their users physically or magically, but also mentally and emotionally.
Let's dig into that.
The Ladybug Miraculous has a fixed alignment with order. (This fact can be reflected in Tikki, the kwami of creation, as well.)
When transformed, this alignment is more obvious as the influence of a miraculous and its kwami is stronger in transformation.
The holder of the Ladybug Miraculous will gradually feel the need to take control of situations around them. Whether this be in battle (there's a reason the ladybug holder is always the leader) or in their personal life.
Things being out of their hands or control, especially when it directly affects them, can make the ladybug holder feel anxious or uncomfortable.
The ladybug holder may find themselves having a harder time loosening up or calming down. Being on high alert 24/7 isn't exactly an expected side effect, but, unfortunately, it is one.
Lists are friends to the ladybug holder; checklists, bullet-point lists, numbered lists, and even lists scribbled across the corners of notebooks in teeny tiny handwriting. Lists help keep everything in order, which is in the comfort zone of a ladybug user.
Plans are also friends. Planning is already a required skill for using the ladybug miraculous in general, as it's very important to know what to do with a lucky charm. But planning is also another way for the ladybug holder to know what to do if something happens.
Take Marinette, for example. She has backup plans for her backup plans. Marinette has plans for when things go right, plans for when things go wrong, plans for when things go semi-right, and/or semi-wrong. She's prepared for every possibility she can think of.
✧・゚: *✧・゚:* *:・゚✧*:・゚✧
Also!
The idea that the ladybug costume has to be based on the classic red and black-spotted ladybug is ridiculous! Utterly ridiculous!
Don't get me wrong, the original ladybug suit and the lucky charm suit will always hold a special place in my heart.
But.
There are so many variations of ladybugs!
There's even a pink ladybug! Pink is Marinettes favorite color.
The Large Leaf Eating Ladybeetle is pretty darn cool as well; it's a static grey with gradient yellow to orange spots. (Which would make such a pretty suit if done right)
Some other ladybugs have white rings around their spots. Some have white spots, or red spots, or no spots at all!
And they come in so many colors?!?! Red, orange, yellow, green, blue, white, grey, or black.
One of my personal favorites is the Steelblue Ladybird. A shiny, blue ladybug. I keep imagining an armored ladybug suit based on it.
Also, ladybugs have wings, which would be pretty cool to incorporate into the ladybug costume.
In conclusion, the ladybug miraculous is cool as fuck and I'm tired of pretending that it isn't.
60 notes · View notes
astragreenwoode · 4 months
Text
♡Treasure (Adventure Time Petrigrof AU)♡ PT 4/?
Tumblr media Tumblr media
(A/N: Part 4. We're getting into heavy angst territory, so be prepared. Sorry to put you guys through heartbreak.
If you are sensitive to themes such as child loss/miscarriage, suicidal ideation, extreme grief, and hospitals, either proceed with caution or feel free to avoid this part altogether. Remember to look out for yourselves.)
♡ My AU where pretty much everything is the same as in canon except Betty is unknowingly pregnant with her and Simon's daughter when she jumps through the portal.
Italics - A/N
Slashed Text - NSFW
Bold Text - Sensitive Topics
A Bump in the Road
♡ When they got to the Emergency Room, the nurses immediately wheeled Betty to an examination room once they saw the trail of blood behind her and Simon. But they needed him to stay behind. They needed help from the hospital security to practically pry them away from each other so they could treat her.
♡ After an hour of waiting when Betty was finally stabilized, Dr. Olson, came out to give Simon the bad news; Betty experienced a late miscarriage. But during their treatment, they had to strap her down to the bed and give her a sedative so she wouldn’t worsen her injuries.
♡ Betty’s situation was time-sensitive. She was in danger of getting an infection, so after updating Simon, Dr. Olson performed a surgical evacuation immediately.
♡ "Princess, we can have another baby. But I can't have another you."
♡ Given Betty’s medical history, a recorded suicide attempt when she was 13 years old, and how she was so distressed that they had to sedate and restrain her, Dr. Olson put her on Suicide Watch, just to be on the safe side.
♡ Up until this point, Simon didn’t know her struggles with her mental health were this severe.
♡ In the meantime, he called Betty’s mother and told her what was happening. She was at the hospital within five minutes.
♡ Alice Grof had trouble warming up to Simon from the beginning. She never liked how he stopped Betty from going on that trip to the Outback. But her daughter was happy, and that’s what mattered the most. And while their relationship wasn’t the warmest, they respected each other. She comforted Simon whilst Betty was still in surgery.
♡ Betty recovers in the hospital for five more days, drained both physically and emotionally. When she first wakes up following the procedure, she’s unresponsive, almost catatonic, and withdrawn from reality to process all the trauma of the whole situation. Simon and Alice make sure she’s never by herself during those five days.
♡ Alice stays with her daughter one day so that Simon can go to their apartment and bring some of Betty’s stuff to the hospital to help her not be as anxious during her stay.
♡ The day before they were ready to go back home, Alice offered to tidy the place up so Betty could recover in a clutter and stress-free environment. She cleaned the blood off their sheets and carpet, made everything neat, stocked their fridge and pantries with food, and made sure their bathroom had the necessary medical supplies to help the healing process. She also hid all items related to their lost baby in a trunk in their hall closet, out of sight, and waiting for whenever Simon and Betty were ready to try again.
♡ When they came back home, they took three weeks off of work so they could mourn their loss together.
♡ Betty returns to taking all her regular antidepressants and antipsychotics. They stabilize her mood and help keep her focused and ‘normal’ when she returns to work, but she’s still numb and withdrawn for a while.
♡ She visits with her mom more frequently, going over to her and her partner Suzanne’s house once a week. The visits help her in her grief.
♡ When Betty started getting her period again, her heart shattered all over again. Simon asked her mother to come over for a few days. 
♡ Proceeding with caution, Simon asks her about what he discovered in the hospital. He wants to understand her past struggles with her mental health; the suicidal ideation in her childhood, the self-harm tendencies, the OCD, the ADHD, the bipolar disorder she inherited from her mother, her past of pain, all of it. He wants to know so he can fully understand how to help her if she spirals again in the future. 
♡ It’s hard for her to open up about that.
♡ Betty avoids intimate and vulnerable situations with Simon for a while. He doesn’t mind at all and is willing to wait as long as she needs. The farthest she’s willing to go is cuddling with him in her underwear. Two months after coming back from the hospital, they graduate to taking showers together again.
♡ At night, Betty still holds Simon’s hand to her stomach as they sleep in bed.
♡ She can still feel their baby kicking from time to time, like experiencing phantom pain after losing a limb.
♡ In an effort to help Betty heal and get back to her old self, Simon surprises her by taking her on a two-week vacation to Ireland; Betty’s dream trip.
♡ A week into the trip, they retire to their suite early after having dinner at the hotel restaurant along with a bottle of wine. And for the first time since their loss, Betty lets Simon all the way in. That night, they unknowingly conceive their future daughter.
♡ The day before they fly back home to Seattle, Simon proposes. Betty says ‘yes.’ And after three months of sitting with their heartbreak, they feel hopeful for what the future might bring them again.
♡ Two months into their engagement, Simon embarks on a solo journey to follow up on a lead for an especially rare artifact.
♡ We all know what happens from here; what was meant as an innocent and playful gesture sparked earth-shattering consequences.
♡ Betty is absolutely petrified by her fiancee’s abrupt personality switch once he puts on the mysterious crown. That wasn't her Simon. So, when a portal to the future opens showing her the fiancee she knew and loved, she doesn’t think twice before she impulsively jumps through a thousand years and into the land of Ooo.
♡ She's blissfully unaware that she didn't jump through that portal alone.
Reblog, follow me, and come back for Part 5!
26 notes · View notes
Text
Burnin’ Up - Firefighter!Chris AU (Part 10: Burning Bridges)
Summary: Recovery is never easy when broken hearted
Word Count: 6.2k
Warnings: ANGST! Talk of Divorce!  Language! Major Injury! Lots of Trauma being dealt with!
Dividers by @firefly-graphics​​
Meet the Characters!
Series Masterlist / Masterlist
Tumblr media
Part 10: Burning Bridges
Chris hurt.
Chris hurt physically, mentally and emotionally. He had been signed off from work for 6 weeks so he could recover from his broken ribs, a relatively small price to pay considering the life he saved. That being said he got an earful from both his captain and his dad about taking unnecessary risks, he’d been suspended for 7 weeks effective immediately, which thankfully meant only 1 extra week on top of his recovery time.
But no matter how much he hurt he didn’t regret any of his actions. He didn’t regret running into the building to save that little girl. He didn’t regret saying what he said to you, because it was the right thing. Every time a sliver of doubt wavered through his mind he had to remind him that, he did the right thing, it was better this way, no matter how much he hurt.
It had been a couple of weeks since his accident and he was trying to act positive. His family had been taking it in turns to visit and help him recover, doing jobs around the house that he couldn’t do while his ribs were still healing. He forced a smile whenever they were over, playing the act he needed to play. But as soon as they were gone he went back to being his miserable self, not even dodger could pull him out of his foul mood.
He tried to keep the act up for as long as he could but he was getting more and more frustrated and irritable, snapping and growling in frustration when things didn’t go his way.
“oh for fuck sake!” Chris growled when he knocked a bag of pasta onto the floor, he let out a sigh before bending down to grab it “shit” he winced when pain shot over his chest.
“here let me get it, go sit down,” Lisa said gently, putting her hand on his shoulder and pushing him towards the island.
“I’m fine let me help” Chris protests trying to step back towards the stove.
“Christopher go sit down” Lisa states pointing over to the stool she wished he’d sit on.
Chris huffs in annoyance before moving to sit down at the island like he’s told. Lisa watches him with a concerned eye before picking up the bag of pasta and returning to the meal they were cooking.
“do you need more painkillers?” she asks as she adds the pasta to the boiling pan.
“no, I took some recently, just waiting for them to kick in” Chris huffs rubbing his forehead tiredly.
“Okay, well why don’t you go lie down while I finish up cooking dinner? It won’t take long” Lisa offers.
“fine” he mutters pushing himself up and sulking out of the kitchen and into the living room.
Sitting down on the couch he rested his head back closing his eyes as he took a couple of deep breaths to rid his brain of all the noise. It was impossible. His despair was interrupted when he left something land in his lap, opening his eyes he found a tennis ball in his lap and Dodger sat waiting expectantly.
“no dodger not now” Chris sighs pushing the tennis ball off his lap.
Dodger quickly scrambled after it, grabbing it only to drop it back in Chris’ lap “I said no Dodger” he grumbled putting the ball down on the couch next to him.
Dodger then lept onto the couch after the ball, his buffy tail repeatedly hitting Chris in the face. Chris growled in frustration trying to get dodger to stop but the mutt just wasn’t listening, Chris had never had an issue with Dodger disobeying him before which just made his frustrations worse. He was close to completely snapping when Lisa walked in.
“Dodger down” she commands, dodger instantly listening and jumping down off of the couch “good boy”
She walks around the back of the couch holding out two bowls “I gave you an extra large portion to help recover” Lisa says passing him a bowl of her famous meatballs.
“Thanks ma,” Chris says giving her a small smile.
He begins tucking into his dinner, normally he absolutely loved his mom’s meatballs, it was arguable his favourite meal. But now it just wasn’t hitting the mark and he found himself wishing he was eating your meatballs instead. As soon as he realised what he was thinking his heart clenched because he couldn’t have that, not anymore. His fork fell from his hand cluttering into his plate.
“oh goodness, you scared me Chris” Lisa gasped clutching her chest.
“sorry ma” Chris muttered picking his fork back up and continuing to eat.
Silence fell in the room with the exception of the noise of forks clanging against plates, and the TV program he had put on in the background. He tried to focus on his meal but he could feel his mom periodically glance over at him, studying him.
“what’s wrong sweetheart” Lisa finally asked.
“apart from the obvious, nothing” Chris huffs keeping his eyes solely on his dinner.
“Something is clearly bothering you, dear, you’re short-tempered and irritable” Lisa pointed out turning to face him.
“no I’m not” Chris grumbles in response.
“Chris you snapped at Stella the other day” Lisa reminded him making him sigh deeply.
“I’m just tired and sore and I dunno… feeling kinda trapped” Chris sighs, it wasn’t the full story but it was enough.
“I understand, I know I’d be getting cabin fever if I was stuck inside,” Lisa says moving closer so she could rub his back.
“I just wish I was recovering faster, able to get out a bit more” Chris sighs putting his plate down on the coffee table.
“I know, but think about all the positives, you get some time off of work to relax and do whatever you want, and you get to spend time with the kids and friends you don’t get the time for usually” Lisa reminds him, Chris giving a non-committal hum “look why don’t you invite your friends over instead of your boring old family”
“you’re not boring ma,” Chris says shaking his head.
“I know” Lisa chuckles “but you’ve seen a lot of us recently and I know we get overbearing sometimes”
Chris couldn’t help but let out a small huff of a laugh at that one. He loved his family but his mom wasn’t wrong with that one.
“so why don’t you see some friends instead, invite Y/N over if she’s free” Lisa suggests.
“she’s not” Chris states sharply.
Lisa frowns at him “if everything okay? Have you guys had an argument or something? I thought you guys were finally on the right track, despite everything I could tell how happy she was to be with you at the hospital”
Chris’ shoulders dropped upon hearing that. Chris could remember the smile on your face when he woke up, he could tell you were worried for him but you were so happy too. But then he remember the look on your face when he told you he didn’t love you. he felt his heart clench as he replayed the memory over and over, hating every second.
“Chris sweetheart what happened?” Lisa presses gently.
“Nothing, she’s just busy” Chris sniffs shaking his head.
“I doubt she’s too busy to see you though, I know she’d find time,” Lisa tells him.
“it’s fine I don’t need to see her” Chris mutters.
Chriss c’mon-“ Lisa starts before Chris interrupts.
“ma just drop it alright! I don’t want to see her! ever!” Chris snaps his jaw set as he stared back at her.
“Chris- what- what happened” Lisa mutters shaking her head at him.
“nothing! It’s- it's nothing” Chris sighs pinching the bridge of his nose.
“it's clearly not,” Lisa says gently getting him to look over at her.
It's- it's complicated” Chris mutters.
“well let's start at the beginning and go from there” Lisa suggests.
Chris sighs nodding his head “okay fine, so about a week before the accident we did have an argument over her father and how horrible he was, I’d gone about it the wrong way and I apologised about it in the ambulance when- when I told her I loved her” Chris sighed.
“oh, Chris” Lisa muttered under her breath.
“yeah but it was wrong, so I told her I lied in the hospital- and that it was better when we didn’t like each other” Chris admits his gaze dropping to his fiddling hands.
“Why would you say that? We both know it’s not true” Lisa says shaking her head in disbelief.
“it is true, it was better, easier” Chris sighs shrugging his shoulder.
“Chris it's not true, you were so happy when you guys were friends, you both were, I know how much you care for her so why did you lie and say you didn’t love her,” Lisa asks.
“I didn’t lie, I don’t love her” Chris states but even he could hear his unconvincing tone.
“You wouldn’t have told her you loved her in the first place if you didn’t, and you can’t blame the smoke inhalation because the doctor said you’d gotten lucky,” Lisa says pointing a finger at him in warning.
“it doesn’t matter, it's better” Chris sighs running his hand down his face.
“How? Chris if it’s making you miserable-“ Lisa says shaking her head.
“It just is okay! It's better for everyone, it might suck now but it’s better in the long run” Chris huffs feeling his frustrations getting the better of him.
“why though?” Lisa pushes.
“because of you!” Chris snaps standing up from the couch “you and dad!”
“what?” Lisa mutters staring up at him in shock.
“I saw it all! I saw how he broke your heart over and over again! I heard you cry so many fucking times because he missed something again!” Chris vented throwing his arms out “I saw how worried you’d get and stressed not knowing if he’d come home safe! Just like how Y/N was scared when I went into that building, saying she wouldn’t know what she do if something worse had happened!”
“you heard us” Lisa muttered dropping her gaze.
“yes! And it took me straight back to every argument you and dad ever had, every time I saw the look on your face when a firetruck drove past the house! And I couldn’t let that be Y/N!” Chris exclaims.
“you don’t know that Chris, she-“ Lisa starts before Chris interrupts.
“yes I do! Because of you and dad! You guys were my definition of love! And you broke up! Firefighting and relationships don’t work! You guys proved that! And if you guys couldn’t do it how the fuck am I going to be able to do it” Chris shouts his chest heaving as he tried to hold back tears “because all I’ve ever heard is how I’m just like dad, so all I’m gonna do is hurt Y/N like he hurt you”
Silence falls in the room, a tense energy atmosphere and Chris’ words hung in the air. He felt like a weight had been lifted off his chest, but a sadness settled inside him. Especially when he heard sniffling and realised it wasn’t his.
“right well… I don’t really know what to say so I’m just going to head home” Lisa says quickly wiping her eyes and standing up from the couch.
“Ma” Chris mutters, guilt washing over him.
“Not now Chris, emotions are too high and we all need to calm down” she sniffs not looking up as she grabbed her jacket and started making her way through the house.
“ma, I’m sorry,” Chris says following after her “I just didn’t want to break her heart”
Lisa pauses by the front door finally turning to face him, Chris’ breath caught when he saw the tears in her eyes “well Christopher you did it anyway, and not just hers” she says before quickly walking out the door.
Tumblr media
Thump
Thump
Thump
The sound of your feet landing on the treadmill was the only sound you were paying any attention to. The speed and incline are higher than what you normally set it as, you wanted your lungs to burn, your heart to pound and your body to ache in a different way. You needed a distraction. Anything to stop the pain that had been caused by Chris, you had tried everything, your go-to happy TV shows and movies, throwing yourself into work, but the only thing that worked was to make yourself hurt in a different way.
The precinct gym was deserted, everyone else working or getting an extra hour of sleep instead of exercising. It was only you and Ben, who had been running next to you the entire time but at a much more leisurely pace. You were vaguely aware of him talking to you, telling you various stories but you weren’t really listening, just humming along at all the right places.
“and then when we arrived at the Captain’s house and it turns out that girl I met the same night I met Matt is his daughter! which made it super awks at least until she suggested a threesome” Ben shrugs.
“wait what?” you state finally hearing what he said, your step faltering making you stumble.
If you hadn’t managed to grab the handles and hit the emergency stop button you would have ended up in a pile of limbs on the floor. Ben presses a couple of buttons on his treadmill reducing the pace down to a stop before turning to face you.
“and she’s back in the room,” he says giving you a knowing look.
You narrow your eyes at him “so no threesome was suggested” you say.
“nope,” ben says shaking his head.
“and the girl from the bar was the captain’s daughter?” you clarify.
“no, no relation at all” he answers.
“then why did you say that?” you exclaim shaking your head at him.
“Because you weren’t listening and it was the first thing that got your attention,” Ben says giving you a knowing look.
You sigh giving him an apologetic look “I’m sorry- wait the first thing? As in there was more?” you ask.
Ben hums nodding his head making you sigh “sorry, I was just in the zone” you apologise setting your treadmill to a walking pace.
“I get that” Ben hums setting his to the same speed “but you know if you want to talk you can always just talk to me,” he says side-eyeing you.
You knew exactly what he meant but you weren’t gonna bite, so you frown over at him “yeah I know” you murmur.
“so if there’s a certain someone you want to vent about…” Ben says trailing off at the end.
“ben I’m fine, I’m over it” you state hitting the button to increase your speed.
“you don’t have to be though you know that right? You can be as mad or as sad as you want to be for as long as you need to be you can take longer than a couple of weeks” Ben tells you.
You resist the urge to look over at him because you knew that he’d been able to tell by the look in your eye that you weren’t okay. That the pain hadn’t even begun to subside. You acted like you were fine around others because you needed to, you could save the emotional moments for when you were home alone.
“I’m fine, I’ve grieved you were there in my apartment when I did so, I’m over it” you mutter looking straight ahead, recalling when you had come home from the hospital to find Ben in your apartment packing a bag for you that you never ended up needing.
Ben hums before reaching over to turn your treadmill off “let's do some boxing” he states stepping off the treadmill leaving you no room to argue.
You groan in annoyance but step off and follow after him, climbing into the small boxing ring that the gym had. Ben gave you a small lopsided grin as he chucked you some pads.
“I’ll go first and then we’ll swap,” Ben says as he straps on the gloves.
You sigh raising the pads ready for Ben to start, jabbing at the pads, throwing in the occasional uppercut. You tried to stay focused but you soon found yourself zoning out, your mind wandering to places you were desperately trying to avoid.
“Alright, I’m good, your turn” Ben pants pushing some hair out of his face.
You just hum, still not completely present, pulling off the pads and passing them to Ben. Taking the gloves and strapping them on, taking a deep breath before starting to lightly punch the pads. You began slowly and lightly, not really putting in the effort. Your mind was still elsewhere, completely stuck on Chris despite your attempts to distract yourself. The more you thought the tougher your punches became, your anger at the situation bubbling to the surface.
“I just don’t get why” you huff, not noticing the small smirk on Ben’s face “if it was better when we hated each other why was he so adamant about becoming friends”
Ben remained silent as you continued to punch and work through your emotions “he was the one who came to me, not the other way around! I wanted to keep him at arm's length but he pushed his way in, maybe that was his plan all along… work his way in and make me lower my guard so he could get his revenge for me slapping him”
You saw Ben bite his lips as if he was trying to stop himself from saying something, but you weren’t done, you didn’t give him a chance to speak even if he wanted to “but either way I shouldn’t care, I shouldn’t feel like there’s been a major loss because I had nothing to lose, he was a friend I’ve only had a couple of months, we weren’t a thing, we were a one night stand I- i- shouldn’t be feeling this fucking heartbroken because he wasn’t mine anyway” you say your chest heaving as you struggle to hold back anymore.
“he looked after me after the RTC or during that storm, he let me feel safe and let me lower all my defences and it meant absolutely nothing because I never got to call him mine, I finally found someone who I could spend the rest of my life with and it was taken away by me and I just don’t get why!” you exclaim sending one last hard punch before bending over to catch your breath trying to stop yourself from crying but there was no use.
“c’mere,” Ben sighed opening his arms out to you.
You stood back up and moved into his embrace, completely breaking down in tears grateful that it was just you and Ben alone in the gym. You had been crying almost every evening for the past couple of weeks but this time it finally felt cathartic, you finally felt that pressure that had been sitting on your chest lifting.
“I’m sorry I wish I could say or do something that could make this easier but I can’t” Ben sighs running his hands up and down your arms.
You nod your head sniffling back your tears “you’re a dude, aren’t you able to get into the mind of other guys?” you joke weakly.
Ben gives you a small chuckle “not straight dudes no” he says making you laugh weakly.
“it was worth a shot” you sigh rubbing your forehead as you turn and take a few steps away, putting your hands on your hips and looking up at the ceiling.
“how do you feel now?” Ben asks looking over at you.
You let out a long sigh “better” you said honestly as you look back over at him.
Ben gives you a small smile “good… that’s good, I know it doesn’t feel like it right now but it’ll get easier and someday you’ll be with someone that makes you feel so much happier and you won’t even remember this”
“I know… I guess I’ve just had a string of bad ones recently” you sigh shaking your head.
“yeah but you’re one less frog away from your prince” Ben offers making you snort with laughter.
“that was bad” you chuckle feeling much lighter.
“I know but it made you laugh” Ben smiles.
“thank you Benny” you smile moving over to hug him.
“it's nothing, and look how about on our next day off we have a movie marathon, any movie you want” Ben suggests putting his hands on your shoulders.
“Sure that sounds good” you smile nodding your head.
Tumblr media
Chris took a deep steadying breath, his mind running over the speech he had been preparing in his mind for the past couple of days. He knew exactly what he wanted to say, what he needed to say. He needed to do this, but he was absolutely dreading it because he didn’t want to see the pain he caused.
Looking down at the flowers in his hand he took another breath before knocking on the door. It took a couple of moments but soon the door opened and he saw his mom, first, she looked surprised before her face settled and Chris could see the apprehension in her eyes. He hated it, he hated that he caused that, it made him want to fall to his knees and beg for forgiveness.
“I’m so sorry ma, for everything” Chris starts holding out the bouquet of flowers.
Lisa took a deep breath, reaching out to take the flowers from him “c’mon in and let’s talk” she says stepping aside to let him.
Chris swallowed nervously nodding as he stepped inside, this was also something he wasn’t looking forward to. he’d almost prefer it if his mom ripped into him, let him know how angry she was. But Chris knew she wasn’t angry, she was disappointed and that was far, far worse.
Chris followed Lisa through the house, glancing at the photos on the wall as he passed them. His eyes gravitated towards one of all 6 of them on a family holiday to Disneyworld when Chris was 10. Life was so much simpler then, nothing had gone wrong yet.
He tore his eyes away from the photo and moved to sit down on the opposite end of the couch to Lisa, his hands rubbing together nervously as silence settled in the room.
“I’m so sorry ma, I didn’t mean what I said, i-I was angry at myself and the situation I’d put myself in and I took it out on you” Chris apologises shaking his head unable to look at Lisa in the eye.
“don’t say that,” Lisa says making Chris look over at her in surprise “don’t say you didn’t mean what you said when we both know that isn’t the case”
“But ma I-“ Chris starts but Lisa put up her hand silencing him.
“you meant it because it’s true, I tried so hard not to believe it, telling myself your bachelor ways would end as soon as you met the right person but I was wrong and the divorce has hurt you and I’m so sorry for you” Lisa apologises shuffling closer of the couch to put her hand on Chris’ knee.
Chris's eyes widen in surprise, this was the last thing he expected to happen “no, no I’m sorry I didn’t mean to hurt you” he says shaking his head.
“you didn’t” Lisa reassures him “not really, I was just upset that you got hurt when I tried so hard to try and protect you”
Chris blinks a couple of times trying to comprehend what his mom was telling him but he couldn’t “Chris I have never been fully honest with you kids, and I realise now that it was wrong” Lisa starts before taking a deep breath “my marriage to your father was over long before we actually got divorced, we had been effectively separated for years but we played the part of a happy family for you kids”
Chris’ jaw dropped, his entire world had been turned on his head, a whole period of his history re-written and his mom was only just getting started “but the arguments…” he mutters shaking his head.
“were always about you kids,” Lisa tells him “we argued because he missed out on stuff that was important to you like your school plays, I can remember how devastated you used to be whenever he never showed up after he promised he would and you were so good at acting and I’ve always wondered what your life could have been like if you never gave it up,” she says before sighing deeply “it’s why I didn’t initially like the idea of you joining the fire department because I knew you were only doing it because it was the one thing you knew he'd always show up for… but it made you happy and that’s all a mother could ask for”
Chris was completely stunned, his mind going back to all the times he’d run off the baseball field, or from backstage hoping to see both his parents and only ever seeing his mom. He’d always tried to hide his disappointment but he should have known he could never hide anything from his mom.
“All I’ve ever done is try and protect you guys from heartbreak, and I’m sorry, if I’d been more honest with you this could have all been avoided and you could be happy in love with Y/N” Lisa sighs dropping her head “but I can’t,” she says looking back up at Chris, her eyes meeting his “so just know this Chris… I never stopped loving your dad,” she says shaking her head “I will always care for him, our love just changed and evolved and we loved each other better as friends than we did as husband and wife”
Chris’ heart hammered in his chest as he remember how you had told him the exact same thing. He didn’t want to believe it at the time, but he knew you were right, he knew his parents still loved each other despite everything. He began to blink back the tears as his mind strayed to over memories of you, ones he knew he would never experience again.
“I’d still end up hurting her” Chris mutters shaking his head “because I’m just like dad”
“no you’re not Chris” Lisa sighs her hand moving to his back to rub comforting circles.
“yes I am, I’ve heard it all my life, from family members to people I barely know, even he said so himself!” Chris exclaimed quickly wiping away a stray tear “so even if me and Y/N did get married and had kids I’d end up doing the exact same thing that dad did”
“no you wouldn’t,” Lisa tells him shaking her head “yes you share many qualities with your father like your stubbornness and your sense of duty, but you also have compassion and loyalty,” Lisa says “how many times have you dropped everything to go help Carly and _ with the kids? You make time for people Chris, you have created a balance between your work and your family already even if you don’t realise it, and I know for a fact that if Y/N or your kids needed you, you would be there in a heartbeat”
Chris nods looking down at the floor as he failed to hold back his tears, Lisa sighs gently as she moves even closer to wrap her arms around him. Chris instantly responded and hugged her tightly just like he did as a kid whenever he was upset.
“And I know it’s a frightening sweetie, and scary to open your heart up to someone but fear should never be the reason not to do something, it should be the reason why you do something because it means you care, and care deeply,” Lisa says rubbing his back.
“do you think I could actually get her back?” Chris asks sniffling back his tears.
“yes, but you need to work out exactly what you need to say,” Lisa tells him “you hurt her really badly Chris and she might not take you back if you don’t do this right, so don’t mess it up”
Chris nods his head “I won’t, thank you ma and I am still sorry” he says with a sheepish smile.
Lisa gives him a small knowing smile “you wouldn’t be you if you weren’t” she chuckles.
Tumblr media
It had been a few days since Chris spoke with his mom about everything. As soon as he left her house he wanted to run straight to your apartment and beg you for forgiveness, but he knew that wouldn’t have been a smart move. He’d learnt a lot about his own past that day and he needed a bit of time to fully process it, let it all sink in so that maybe he’d have the best chance for growth.
He also wanted to get his life back on track, he’d spent the last couple of weeks being a miserable asshole wallowing in his own self-pity. He knew he needed to have a few wins, so he visited his niece and nephews, and called some friends that he hasn’t spoken to as recently as he would like. He took dodger out for a few walks, slowly building himself back up. He even cleaned his house from top to bottom. He was finally being productive in the longest time off from work that he’ll probably ever get.
But most importantly he needed to work out exactly what to say to you. he had a lot of explaining and grovelling to do and he knew if he didn’t have it all planned out he would panic and not get out what he really needed to say. He needed a second chance and he knew it wouldn’t be easy to get, you were just as stubborn as him after all… and with a mean swing. The only problem was that he couldn’t work it out, everything he came up with sounded confusing and convoluted. Even he wouldn’t take him back.
After another evening of lying on the couch trying to get his mind to form coherent sentences, he decided to give it a break. He’d been meaning to go grocery shopping and since his chest was still sore he decided to go late in the day so he wouldn’t get in other people’s way.
When he got to his usual grocery store he grabbed a cart and started making his way up and down the aisle. He grabbed everything he knew he needed, as well as a couple of extra things on top. He also decided to grab some ingredients so he could make his ma dinner, even though they were good now, Chris wasn’t going to stop trying to make it up to her too.
He was just standing in the snack aisle grabbing some chips and sweets for the next movie night with the kids when he heard your voice. He froze in his spot, his heart pounding in his chest because he wasn’t ready, he didn’t know what to say. He hoped that he was hearing things but then he saw you appear at the bottom of the aisle phone pressed to your ear as you spoke.
“Well, you’re the one who ate all my snacks, Benny! Really you should be the one doing the snack run not me” you chuckle shaking your head clearly unaware of Chris stood only a few feet away.
Seeing you here right now only solidified it in Chris’ mind how desperately in love he was with you. He had missed you so goddamn much it hurt, he wanted to just surge forward and wrap his arms around you and never let you go ever again.
You were his beacon of light, dressed in an old Boston PD sweatshirt and leggings, looking like an absolute Greek goddess to Chris.
“I know you just said to get popcorn but I wanna know if there’s anything else you want!” you exclaim, laughing gently as you shook your head “because a popcorn alone is not going to last long….. no Benny I am not calling you fat, we both know you have the physique of a GC model” you add rolling your eyes, and it was at that moment that you finally spotted Chris, the smile on your face instantly falling “I have to go, just text me what you want” you mutter into the phone, your eyes set firmly on Chris’.
Chris took a big steadying breath, neither of you moving or saying anything. He noticed how your eyes darted from his to the shelves right beside him where the popcorn was. Your feet shuffle on the spot before beginning to turn away and Chris knew he was about to lose his chance.
He quickly grabbed a couple of boxes of popcorn from the shelf “Y/N wait!” he called out as he moved to follow you.
“Chris no I don’t want to hear it,” you say keeping your back to him as you move into the next aisle down.
“Y/N please I-I just wanna talk” he presses quickly moving around you and blocking your path.
“yeah well I don’t so leave me alone” you state spinning on your heel and walking back the way you came.
“Y/N please I messed up big time and I-I just want to explain,” he says following after you again, he was already stumbling over his words and losing track of what he wanted to say.
“I don’t want to hear your pathetic excuses,” you tell him refusing to turn around and face him, walking down aisles that Chris knew you definitely didn’t need anything from, namely the pet aisle.
“Y/N can you please just wait and let me try and explain” Chris begs finally getting you to stop and turn around and face him, he gulped nervously when he saw the look in your eyes, they were filled with so many emotions that you were trying to hide, like anger and sorrow “I uh-“ he says glancing down and spotting the popcorn in his hands “here,” he says holding it out.
You look down at the box in his hands, frowning in confusion when you glanced back up at him “you came here for popcorn so here” he explains.
You shuffle on the spot, wearily glancing back down at the box of popcorn before slowly reaching out to take it from him. Chris’ lips twitch upwards, okay maybe he was getting this back on track. His eyes then met yours and he felt himself get all nervous again, scratching the back of his neck as he tried to think of what to say.
He sighed deeply before deciding to just go for it “Look I know you hate me-“ he starts before he gets interrupted by you scoffing and shaking your head.
“hate you? you think I hate you?” you ask astonished, Chris blinked a couple of times surprised at your question, nodding his head quickly “I don’t hate you, Chris, I hate how you- you have made me feel the happiest I have ever felt, I hate how you looked after me when I needed it, I hate that you know me so fucking well that you let me tear down every defence I have ever built, let me feel safe for the first time in my life! I hate how even after everything my heart still skips a fucking beat whenever I see you!” you rant throwing your arms out, your chest heaving as you got everything off your chest.
Silence falls between the two of you and Chris didn’t know what to say or do. He wanted to wrap his arms around you and tell you it would be okay, that he was sorry but he knew that it wouldn’t end well. It would only push you further away.
You took a deep and shaky breath looking up at Chris, tears in your eyes “… But I could never hate you Chris… even if I desperately want to” you whisper shaking your head.
Chris’ heart broke as he shook his head trying to hold back his own tears, he couldn’t be losing you for good, he just couldn’t “Y/N please… please give me a second chance” he mutters his voice breaking.
You screwed your eyes shut taking a shuddering breath as you looked away, the pain you were feeling clear on your face “No, I- I did that and got hurt worse than before, I can’t let it happen again, so just leave me alone and forget about me” you say glancing over at him, unable to bring yourself to look at him.
“Y/N…I-” Chris muttered but you had already turned and walked away from him, disappearing around the corner and out of his life for what felt like the final time.
Tumblr media
😬 I’m sorry!!!! I couldn’t let this all be fixed so easily! Feel free to shout at me in the comments or my ask box!
Sharing is caring so please reblog if you enjoyed this and maybe even leave a comment to make my day!
Series Masterlist / Masterlist
I don’t have a tag list but follow @secretswiftymarvelfanlibrary​ and turn on post notifications to stay up to date!
223 notes · View notes
moonlit-positivity · 2 months
Text
Things ppl will say to a minor who shows signs of anxiety, depression, eating disorders & self harm:
"Get real! You're too young! You're faking for attention! Go back to your coloring books! Children can't be depressed! You have no reason to be that way! So disrespectful! I bet your parents need to beat it out of you! Wait until you get some "real life" experiences and then we'll talk!"
Things I personally experienced as a minor that gave me those symptoms:
drunk, abusive, physically volatile parents, household full of arguments and physical violence on a daily basis to the point of constant police intervention, child sexual assault perpetuated by all adults in the household, child sexual assault perpetuated by other children in the neighborhood, sexual assault perpetuated by other adults in the community, emotionally unavailable & emotionally immature, volatile, neglectful, and reactive mother who constantly put me down and blamed me for all of her problems, absent father figure, resentment and shame and humiliation at how many other children at school had better families and opportunities than I did, my own mother's eating disorder and dysfunctional diet culture forced onto me from middle school age, growing up in an environment rampant of drugs and alcohol use, growing up in an environment of unstable mental health, growing up in an environment of poverty, having to sacrifice my own childhood and adolescence to work a job at 14 years old to help pay bills because my mother was too drunk and spending all the money we had on beer and drugs, and then having teachers listen to me talk about it and nothing ever got done about it.
Yes, children experience real life symptoms of abuse. Yes, it happens right in front of you. Let's stop downplaying child abuse and call it for what it is- every day life. it's the shitty, abusive, volatile, emotionally regressive parents, home environments, poverty, and lack of community supports. It's the way you yell at your kid for being "lazy" and beat them to distill discipline and "real world" experiences. It's the way you mock and belittle their hopes, dreams, interests, hobbies, personal autonomy, and call them dumb and stupid for ever having dreamed they were worth the effort. It's the way you indoctrinated and condemn them to your own belief systems. It's the way you yell, scream, neglect, and refuse to heal your own generational trauma and bias towards how to raise a child. It's the way you ignore the fact that child sexual abuse exists and it doesn't look like the stereotypical "man with a van" but rather the football coach that works at the local YMCA, the grocery store manager, the church deacon, the woman at the PTA. Its the way you invalidate, deny, enable, and refuse to acknowledge your own part in raising an unsafe home environment. It's the way you gaslight and pick sides when children come forth and speak about their experiences.
Child abuse is not a myth limited to the likes of prime time TV shows and Hollywood documentaries. Child abuse happens every single day. Right in front of you. Let's work harder to call it out. Let's work harder to give children a voice in a society hell bent on taking it away.
9 notes · View notes
nightowltribe · 3 months
Text
Tumblr media
Therapy recap
Tumblr media
So we've brought up in therapy that we struggle with keep up with platonic relationships because we feel like we have to constantly be earn friendships and good graces, but we don't have a lot of time and energy to offer after work, home, physical health, and mental health. We don't feel like we have any positive qualities that someone would want to be around us for without us doing something to earn it; we don't think we are kind, positive, fun, funny, or enjoyable to be around, we feel like we are a downer, needy, a burden, an awkward joykill. This is because we were raised by traumatized parents that didn't get help for their issues, an emotionally immature father and covert narcissist mother, we were never enough but at the same time 'better off than they were'.
Our issues were treated like we weren't trying hard enough, being lazy, or us trying to make excuses and not the cry for help they were. We struggled so fucking hard but no adult around us seen it, Kat is hung up with how our teen years were the darkest part of our life where we tried to turn to self harm as a way to manage the emotional pain we were in and suicidal idealation because we felt like this was the best life had to offer and we deserved so much worse. Kain used the dissociative barriers to hide the pocket knife when Ash would want to self harm because that would've just made our life harder, and Kat had numerous caretakers through that time because he needed to feel loved even though they couldn't give him the physical love he needed. There is still so much pain from that part of our life that needs to be healed because the only reason we didn't become another teenage suicide statistic because we have DID, but its hard because the ones that want to heal it can't access it.
Our father grew up, matured some, and apologized for what he did back then, he still wasn't a model dad before he died but he did change some of his toxic behaviors. Our mother refuses to take accountability for her part in our trauma, she will emotionally manipulate, get defensive and turn it around on us, try to make it out like we don't want her to be happy, change history by claiming it didn't happen that way or she didn't do that, claim to be a victim, and try to spin it to make our father the perpetrator. She continues to reinforce our negative thoughts about us by making us feel like shit for doing what she told us to, not be able to do something she asks of us, for making a mistake that results in something unfavorable; no 'you don't have a lot of experience so that is going to happen' or 'this is a good learnjng experience, just use this to get better at it', its all 'you should've known better' and 'you should've tried harder'.
She feels the need to have control over things in the lives of the people around her, and if she is helping then you shouldn't have an opinion about it and do it her way. Her image and reputation are improtant to her and anything that could stain it needs to be handled with with severe prejeduce, but while she can seem friendly and generous she will be talking shit about other people in her life but make you feel like that won't happen to you because those other people are just bad people. In reality she is kissing up to others while talking shit about someone else and no one is safe from her shit slinging because she will find something in everyone to complain about to someone else.
When she said she was going to start therapy I talked with my therapist about it and he said that a therapist can only treat what their clients admit they need to improve and she will likely play the victim and avoid accountability; that she might wield therapy as another way to try to control the people in her life. We talked about how we already thought of the scenario of her trying to do co-counseling to 'fix things' and that we would say no because anything we'd bring up in counseling would be seemingly met with grace in front of her therapist but it would be used as ammo against us outside of the office.
While I understand and agree that somepeople that are diagnosed as narcissists don't harm others there are those that do and do so intentionally in a very specific way to make the term narcissistic abuse a thing, something we have had to grow up with and something that nearly drove us to suicide if not for our own mental illness being how we cooed with it. We have been deeply traumatized by that kind of abuse and it has changed the person we could've been so drastically for the worse to the point we see ourselves below everyone else and we have no idea where to even start healing it.
8 notes · View notes
thatweirdocat · 3 months
Text
Here’s my contribute to the Aphmau Fandom 😭🤭 I’m gay.
Katelyn gently pushed the coffee cup into the slot, pushing a few buttons on the machine and listening to it whirl to life. If you told Katelyn years ago that she would be here, making coffee and waiting for the day to start, she would have laughed and called you crazy. She didn't think she would survive their trip from Starlight Wonderland, but here she was.
The woman moved her mug from its confinement and nursed it in her hands as she made her way to the porch. The spring morning air hit her hard. It was cold and dewy out. More of a reason for her to be outside. The bird chirped softly. It was nice. She preferred this over another trip the group could plan. She swore to herself she would never leave for a trip like that again. At least not for a few years. She was too hurt -physically, mentally, and emotionally from Starlight. She wanted to rest for the rest of her life. No more fighting. No more trips. No more anything. Just home. Where she belonged.
It took her months to build the confidence she has now. She lived under her father's roof for those months. Both Katelyn and her father knew she couldn't be trusted at home alone.
"Katelyn?"
The voice was soft and sweet. It pulled at her heart, making it flip. She smiled, placed the mug down, and turned to look at the voice.
Nana stood in all her glory. The blue button-up hung loosely on her shoulders and barely covered her thighs. It left everything to the imagination. Katelyn cleared her throat and beckoned the female.
Nana smiled, shuffled over, and sat in the blue-haired girl's lap. Katelyn's arms snaked around her hips and hummed, kissing her bare shoulder.
"You okay?" The meif'wa pulled away and sat down completely, legs on either side of the older one. "You woke up a bit earlier than normal," she pouted slightly, her hands cupping Katelyn's cheek.
Katelyn couldn't help but lean into it. Nana was always so warm, almost a walking furnace, she liked to blame it on her cat genes. "I'm more than okay,"
"You took your meds, yeah?"
Katelyn nodded, letting her free hand trace some of the jagged skin near Nana's collarbone. She watched the other shiver. "You put your cream on?"
"Mmm, not yet," Nana watched her girlfriend stiffen a bit. "but I will," she added. "Promise,"
The human grew quiet again, just staring at the beautiful woman before her. Nana let her, purring softly.
The moment was broken when a yell was heard. Both girls snapped their heads to the source. There stood Aaron and Aphmau. Aphmau waving. Aaron, like always, staring dead on. Katelyn couldn't help but wonder when his eyes would heal. Nana laughed and smiled. Waving back. Katelyn held her waist to keep her from falling, the shirt slid up a bit, showing the light pink undergarment.
Katelyn laughed and pulled the shirt back down, glancing at Nana. "Hey, sit down, you're gonna give them a show if you continue," she chuckled.
Nana squeaked and sat back, hiding her face in Katekyns neck. "Katelyn~Sama," sometimes Nana's old ways slipped, and every time Katelyn's heart skipped a beat.
"Good, you're so cute," She held the meif'wa closer, kissing her jaw and looking up at the other two. "Good morning!" Aphmau shouted something back before she was pulled away.
After a few moments: "Katelyn?"
"Nana?"
"I love you,"
Katelyn blushed and pulled away so she could see Nana's face. Both their faces are bright red. "I love you too,"
8 notes · View notes
hydn-jpg · 10 months
Text
hello!! i am alive !!!!
how have y'all been? i've definitely been better lol
so... i can explain. or maybe not. i've never been good at talking about things but i'll do my best
under the cut bc a bunch of things happened and this'll probably be very long:
honestly where do i even start?
it has been a very rough almost month and a half for me, it was as if whatever god or entity out there went "lol wouldn't it be funny if we made this person go through several bad things all within the span of a few weeks" and then did just that
in early august i got a call from my mom that my grandmother had passed away. i had just gotten home from class at the time, but i immediately went out again and took the soonest available flight back to korea for her funeral. losing her hit me pretty hard honestly, she was the one i turned to when things were hard, and was also the only one who was generally supportive of my identity and sexuality. she didn't really get it, but she never made homophobic or transphobic comments, and was always kind and unconditionally loving. chuseok this year will be difficult without her around but at least she is in a better place i hope.
i took two weeks off from school to stay with my family after that. when i got back i was mostly catching up on all the classes i missed so i had very little time to do anything else. the stress coupled with all the physical exertion and everything else lead me to have the worst asthma attack i've experienced as of yet, it could've gotten a lot worse if it weren't for my kind neighbours who rushed to help me when they saw me struggling in the hallway
then in late august i got into a car accident. i was driving home from campus (which is an hour away), it was raining very heavily and i guess i lost control of my car. i am not sure what exactly happened honestly, one moment i was driving peacefully (and at appropriate speed for driving in the rain) and the next moment my car was spinning around and hitting the guardrails before crashing. it sounds cliché but everything was in slow motion and i literally saw my life flash before my eyes. i'm really thankful that the highway was basically empty, so no one else was affected. i somehow came out of the accident with only a concussion, a badly sprained arm and neck and some cuts and bruises. those will surely heal with time but the trauma of it will probably stay for quite a while.
so that's what happened. my mental health has not been great but i've been feeling a bit better lately! so that's good. i've been too physically, mentally and emotionally drained to do anything haha.
i probably won't be able to draw for a while thanks to my injury so you won't be seeing any art from me for at least another month or so,, to people i still owe commissions to, i will have to give you an IOU because again, i can't draw rn but also because i lost basically all the art that i haven't backed up during the crash, which unfortunately includes the commission sketches :( i'm so sorry, i'll redraw them as soon as i'm able to. i really wish procreate had an automatic cloud backup system so at least the sketches i did were saved but we can't always get what we want i guess,,
thank you to everyone who reached out and asked about my wellbeing and i'm really sorry for ignoring your messages and tags. i'll get to them as soon as i can!
tldr; my grandma passed, i had a bad asthma attack and i got into a car accident but i am okay. not really but i'll be okay maybe. lmao.
21 notes · View notes
its-a-me-lia · 9 months
Text
Scars are Stories to tell in the dark
LA!BuggyxFem!OC
Part 3 of Darling, why are you crying Darling?
Part 1| Part 2| Part 3| Part 4| Part 5| Part 6| Part 7
MDNI
Warnings: Scars
Buggy is starting to fall in love with his new friend
🌼🌸🌼🌸🌼🌸🌼🌸🌼🌸🌼🌸🌼🌸🌼🌸🌼🌸
Buggy was glad that Ava had started to open up much more around him. He was beginning to think they were going backwards in their progress, but she had proved him wrong once again. After the night they spent on deck, he began putting pieces together. She was injured. Physically, and emotionally. A little bit of mentally but he won’t conclude that yet unless she gives him the go to analyze her. 
He didn’t mean to stare at her, he didn’t mean to watch as she began to change her clothes with her door cracked open. Did she want him to catch her? Was this a game of trust for her? To see if he would act upon his wants and needs as a man? Try to seduce her, with his witty charm and clever smile. That’s all she ever saw men as. Sex fiends that want women to be nothing but a toy to them. Not buggy. No Buggy didn’t know what he wanted. Not yet at least. 
The faint red marks on her body, the way her back curved ever so slightly. The scars from one side to the other. What had she gone through? When he mentioned scars to her earlier when they had met on the beach, he was speaking metaphorically. But this woman; she had physical scars to show her story. He just didn’t know if she would tell him. He wasn’t going to beg her to tell him. No, he was going to wait. 
And waiting is what he does. 6 months at sea with the Captain. 6 months and Ava had grown closer to Buggy, allowing him in her life little by little.She would sneak into the captain’s room and sit on his bed, as he brushed his long hair. She didn’t realize how long his hair was. It was always tucked up under his bandana, she would sometimes see strands of blue coming from underneath. But tonight, he let it down and brushed it.It was also around the time she found out he had a devil fruit curse. 
The Chop Chop Fruit. 
The man could split his body into pieces and she was amazed by that. He didn’t struggle with high or low places. She liked that about him, he would tease her and hold her things up high, making her jump for it. He liked to see her smile. She laughed once and it was so beautiful to him. It was like snow falling for the first time, where snow never fell. He gave in then and just enjoyed her voice. He did everything he could just to see her smile. To hear her laugh. It was healing. 
Ava walked over to him, standing behind him and looked through the mirror to meet his gaze. 
“Can I brush your hair?” She asked him. 
He stopped, he never had been asked before. Of course, he never insisted on ever needing help. He didn’t. 
“Why?” He questioned. He wasn’t suspicious, just curious as to why she wanted to. 
“My mother used to brush my hair when I was younger. She brushed my hair right before-” She paused and licked her lips, “-right before she passed.”
Buggy nodded and handed her the brush. He didn’t know why he just handed over the brush to her, he just did. She took it with ease and began to brush his ends and ran it through root to ends. His hair was so soft, and thick. She smiled as she watched him close her eyes. This moment was intimate, it changed the course for their relationship. He trusted her, she trusted him. She ran her fingers through his hair and started to hum a song. She braided his hair, the way her mother used to. 
“What’s that song called?” He whispered, he didn’t want to ruin the moment between them. 
She tied the end of the braid and looked at him. “Ava’s lullaby.”
His heart pounded, he could feel the world spinning just a little. “Who’s Ava?”
“That’s my name.” He turned to look at her. Ava, the taste of her name on his tongue and lips, were delicious. Her name was so beautiful. 
“Ava” He tested it again, but this time outloud. He liked the way it sounded out of his mouth, 
She liked the way he said it, as if it was so precious he didn’t want anyone else to know. Like it was his secret. Her eyes caught his, he reached his hand up slowly, to not startle her. She didn’t flinch this time. She looked soft, delicate. Like a dandelion that will blow away in the wind, if he breathed too hard on her. Touching her face with the tips of his fingers, she felt just as soft. 
It was like she was seeing the sunshine for the first time in a long time. The dark haze that was covering her gaze these past 6 months has finally gone away. She could see clearly now, she could see Buggy. His hand laid flat against her cheek, she pressed it into his hand, taking in his scent. He was in fact alluring to her. He smelled of wood, and face paint, and whatever he used to wash his hair, he was so addicting. 
Opening her eyes to catch the man before her; taking her in. His eyes never left hers. She never left his gaze. They didn’t know how long they were staring at each other. 
“I know.” She broke the silence. 
He raised a brow. “Know what?”
She smiled sadly. “That you saw my scars, my body.”
“I’m sorry, I didn’t mean to look. I was just looking for you and your door was opened, Your back was turned and I just happened to gaze a little longer than I wanted to.” He was quick with his words, trying to defend himself. 
“It’s okay, really. I wanted you to see them. One of your crew members had told me you were looking for me. I kept my door open on purpose. I knew you were curious, you speak aloud and you’ve been curious for a while.” Her smile never dropped,
She had wanted him to see her? She trusted him that much that she was willing to let her in. Just like that. He couldn’t stop the frown on his face. “You don’t have to tell me now, or you don’t have to tell me at all. Just know that I will never hurt you, lay a hand on you. I’m not that kind of guy.”
She let out a soft laugh, dammit that laugh again. Buggy was ruined for anyone else. “I know, your crew told me what kind of guy you are.”
“And what kind of guy am I?” He was interested in what his crew had to say about him. 
“You actually care, for some reason even though you are a feared pirate, you care a lot. You don’t like what you do. But you do it, to keep up a reputation.” She looked into his eyes. “You are so sweet to me. You’re scared to be near me, you act all brave and fearsome in front of your crew, but around me. You’re scared of me.”
Buggy swallowed and released his hand from her face, Ava frowning at the loss of warmth on her cheek. “I didn’t like the look in your eyes when you thought I was going to hit you. You flinched and fell, coward  away from me and cried. I hate what that man has done to you. He broke you, and I want to help put you back together. I know I won’t be able to fix you 100 percent, some broken things are meant to have cracks and missing chips, nothing is ever fixed fully from being broken. But I can help pull those pieces together, and hold them together. It’ll take time. I don’t expect to be the remedy, or a cure. I want to be the reason that you smile, that you laugh. God, I love your laugh.” 
Ava had tears in her eyes, why is that a feared pirate knew much more about love than a regular old human? How is it that this man has shown her more love and kindness in 6 months then she did in the 5 years she was with her ex? She couldn’t exactly place the right words together, she didn’t know how to feel or what to do in this exact moment. She just cried, and laughed. 
She knew this was the life she wanted, he was going to bring her happiness, but not just yet. She had more healing to do. She wanted to go along on this journey with Buggy. She had no doubt about that, this man was going to be her end game. She could feel it. 
Night fell, and Ava had retired to her room for the night. Both her and Buggy had come to the understanding that from this point on they were just friends. Just for now. She knew how he felt about her, and he knew how she felt about him, they just had to wait a little while longer. 
On the other side of the ocean, a man had gotten a call that they had spotted the woman, on the Big Top. The name of Buggy’s ship. He smiled and ticked his head to side, letting out a breathy laugh. 
“Finally, I’m going to make sure she comes home for good this time. And that Pirate. Is to die. At my hand.” His voice was hoarse as if he spent hours smoking and yelling. He wasn’t going to stop until every town is turned up and every pirate knew who they were dealing with. “No one is to touch Ava, I will be the one to bring her home.”
Jeremy stared out the window as his cohort nodded understanding the plan this man had made. He didn’t quite understand his obsession, but nonetheless he wasn’t going to be useless.
Back at sea, two souls slept peacefully with the thought of a new future.
🌼🌸🌼🌸🌼🌸🌼🌸🌼🌸🌼🌸🌼🌸🌼🌸🌼🌸
this story is coming to me like clockwork! aaahhh
12 notes · View notes
cookiesncreamlover17 · 10 months
Text
Yandere! Older! Billy Batson x Reader
A Yandere Alphabet, Part 9/60 (In Alphabetical Order)
Tumblr media
youtube
(The Songs Under The Yandere Characters Are The Songs That They Remind Me Of. They’re Strictly Going To Be From Taylor Swift.)(Hugeeee Swifty, If You Couldn’t Tell)
⚠️Warnings⚠️: Swearing, Broken Legs, Physical Abuse, Mental Abuse, Mention Of Death,
🇺🇸Word Count🇺🇸: 1,515
👾Characters👾: 9,623
𝔸 - 𝔸𝕗𝕗𝕖𝕔𝕥𝕚𝕠𝕟, ℍ𝕠𝕨 𝔻𝕠 𝕋𝕙𝕖𝕪 𝕊𝕙𝕠𝕨 𝕋𝕙𝕖𝕚𝕣 𝕃𝕠𝕧𝕖 𝔸𝕟𝕕 𝔸𝕗𝕗𝕖𝕔𝕥𝕚𝕠𝕟? ℍ𝕠𝕨 𝕀𝕟𝕥𝕖𝕟𝕤𝕖 𝕎𝕠𝕦𝕝𝕕 𝕀𝕥 𝔾𝕖𝕥?
After all of those years training and working payed off. He was apart of the Justice league. Since he’s been through all of those years of training and survived the dark apocalypse, he’s even more clingy when it comes to affection. He’s extremely intense.
𝔹 - 𝔹𝕝𝕠𝕠𝕕, ℍ𝕠𝕨 𝕄𝕖𝕤𝕤𝕪 𝔸𝕣𝕖 𝕋𝕙𝕖 𝕎𝕚𝕝𝕝𝕚𝕟𝕘 𝕋𝕠 𝔾𝕖𝕥 𝕎𝕙𝕖𝕟 𝕀𝕥 ℂ𝕠𝕞𝕖𝕤 𝕋𝕠 𝕋𝕙𝕖𝕚𝕣 𝔻𝕒𝕣𝕝𝕚𝕟𝕘?
He’s had to fight people for along time. Now he doesn’t even feel guilt when it comes to hurting others just so he keep you safe.
ℂ - ℂ𝕣𝕦𝕖𝕝𝕥𝕪, ℍ𝕠𝕨 𝕎𝕠𝕦𝕝𝕕 𝕋𝕙𝕖𝕪 𝕋𝕣𝕖𝕒𝕥 𝕋𝕙𝕖𝕚𝕣 𝔻𝕒𝕣𝕝𝕚𝕟𝕘 𝕆𝕟𝕔𝕖 𝔸𝕓𝕕𝕦𝕔𝕥𝕖𝕕. 𝕎𝕠𝕦𝕝𝕕 𝕋𝕙𝕖𝕪 𝕄𝕠𝕔𝕜 𝕋𝕙𝕖𝕞?
He would only mock you if it would lowering your babbling. As much as he loves your beautiful voice, all the smart remarks get old after a while.
𝔻 - 𝔻𝕒𝕣𝕝𝕚𝕟𝕘, 𝔸𝕤𝕚𝕕𝕖 𝔽𝕣𝕠𝕞 𝔸𝕓𝕕𝕦𝕔𝕥𝕚𝕠𝕟, 𝕎𝕠𝕦𝕝𝕕 𝕋𝕙𝕖𝕪 𝔻𝕠 𝔸𝕟𝕪𝕥𝕙𝕚𝕟𝕘 𝔸𝕘𝕒𝕚𝕟𝕤𝕥 𝕋𝕙𝕖𝕚𝕣 𝔻𝕒𝕣𝕝𝕚𝕟𝕘𝕤 𝕎𝕚𝕝𝕝?
He will make you his on personal therapist. He worked for so long and he worked so hard, he needs someone to talk about it with. And that ‘lucky’ person was none other than his ‘wife’, you!
𝔼 - 𝔼𝕩𝕡𝕠𝕤𝕖𝕕, ℍ𝕠𝕨 𝕄𝕦𝕔𝕙 𝕆𝕗 𝕋𝕙𝕖𝕚𝕣 ℍ𝕖𝕒𝕣𝕥 𝔻𝕠 𝕋𝕙𝕖𝕪 𝔹𝕒𝕣𝕖 𝕋𝕠 𝕋𝕙𝕖𝕚𝕣 𝔻𝕒𝕣𝕝𝕚𝕟𝕘? ℍ𝕠𝕨 𝕍𝕦𝕝𝕟𝕖𝕣𝕒𝕓𝕝𝕖 𝔸𝕣𝕖 𝕋𝕙𝕖𝕪 𝕎𝕙𝕖𝕟 𝕀𝕥 ℂ𝕠𝕞𝕖𝕤 𝕋𝕠 𝕋𝕙𝕖𝕚𝕣 𝔻𝕒𝕣𝕝𝕚𝕟𝕘?
After all of the wars he doesn’t want to appear weak, but sometimes he can’t help it and spills out all of his feelings and thoughts. And it could go from a bumpy plane ride to Wonder Woman’s arm being ripped off (her scream still brings me nightmares to this day).
𝔽 - 𝔽𝕚𝕘𝕙𝕥, ℍ𝕠𝕨 𝕎𝕠𝕦𝕝𝕕 𝕋𝕙𝕖𝕪 𝔽𝕖𝕖𝕝 𝕀𝕗 𝕋𝕙𝕖𝕚𝕣 𝔻𝕒𝕣𝕝𝕚𝕟𝕘 𝔽𝕠𝕦𝕘𝕙𝕥 𝔹𝕒𝕔𝕜?
He DID NOT push through the most painful experience of his life to come home to you screaming. For once in his life, he’s smack you to the floor and drag you to the basement. Prepare to stay there until he lets you back upstairs in three days.
𝔾 - 𝔾𝕒𝕞𝕖, 𝕀𝕤 𝕋𝕙𝕚𝕤 𝔸 𝔾𝕒𝕞𝕖 𝕋𝕠 𝕋𝕙𝕖𝕞? ℍ𝕠𝕨 𝕄𝕦𝕔𝕙 𝕎𝕠𝕦𝕝𝕕 𝕋𝕙𝕖𝕪 𝔼𝕟𝕛𝕠𝕪 𝕎𝕒𝕥𝕔𝕙𝕚𝕟𝕘 𝕋𝕙𝕖𝕚𝕣 𝔻𝕒𝕣𝕝𝕚𝕟𝕘 𝕋𝕣𝕪 𝕋𝕠 𝔼𝕤𝕔𝕒𝕡𝕖?
He’s worked too hard to deal with your constant protest, screaming, and escape attempts. He just gets really sick and tired of it. He might even permanently damage your legs so you can’t run. He’ll do it with his bare hands and no anesthesia.
ℍ - ℍ𝕖𝕝𝕝, 𝕎𝕙𝕒𝕥 𝕎𝕠𝕦𝕝𝕕 𝔹𝕖 𝕋𝕙𝕖𝕚𝕣 𝔻𝕒𝕣𝕝𝕚𝕟𝕘’𝕤 𝕎𝕠𝕣𝕤𝕥 𝔼𝕩𝕡𝕖𝕣𝕚𝕖𝕟𝕔𝕖 𝕎𝕚𝕥𝕙 𝕋𝕙𝕖𝕞?
On his last attempt of stopping your escapes he not only broke both of your legs on the spot, but described all of your friends who died during the war. He will go into very specific details about how they brutally died. You never healed the same physical and emotionally after that experience.
𝕀 - 𝕀𝕕𝕖𝕒𝕝𝕤, 𝕎𝕙𝕒𝕥 𝕂𝕚𝕟𝕕 𝕆𝕗 𝔽𝕦𝕥𝕦𝕣𝕖 𝔻𝕠 𝕋𝕙𝕖𝕪 ℍ𝕒𝕧𝕖 𝕀𝕟 𝕄𝕚𝕟𝕕 𝔽𝕠𝕣/𝕎𝕚𝕥𝕙 𝕋𝕙𝕖𝕚𝕣 𝔻𝕒𝕣𝕝𝕚𝕟𝕘?
He has the same wanted future since he was a kid. You two have foster kids as well as some biological kids of your own. You visit your ‘family’ on the weekends and live happily ever after!
𝕁 - 𝕁𝕖𝕒𝕝𝕠𝕦𝕤𝕪, 𝔻𝕠 𝕋𝕙𝕖𝕪 𝔾𝕖𝕥 𝕁𝕖𝕒𝕝𝕠𝕦𝕤? 𝔻𝕠 𝕋𝕙𝕖𝕪 𝕃𝕒𝕤𝕙 𝕆𝕦𝕥 𝕆𝕣 𝔽𝕚𝕟𝕕 𝔸 𝕎𝕒𝕪 𝕋𝕠 ℂ𝕠𝕡𝕖?
Now that he’s a lot older and more mature and over half the worlds wiped out, he’s matured a lot. Whenever he’s jealous it mostly about paparazzi giving you attention. If you’re not allowed out, he’s get slightly jealous if you spend more time with his family than him himself. His best way to cope is to get you away from this person.
𝕂 - 𝕂𝕚𝕤𝕤𝕖𝕤, ℍ𝕠𝕨 𝔻𝕠 𝕋𝕙𝕖𝕪 𝔸𝕔𝕥 𝔸𝕣𝕠𝕦𝕟𝕕 𝕆𝕣 𝕎𝕚𝕥𝕙 𝕋𝕙𝕖𝕚𝕣 𝔻𝕒𝕣𝕝𝕚𝕟𝕘?
He’s still as clingy as ever. If you two already have a kid (or multiple) together, he is already near your twenty-four/seven. He would smuggle you and your child/children in gifts.
𝕃 - 𝕃𝕠𝕧𝕖 𝕃𝕖𝕥𝕥𝕖𝕣𝕤, ℍ𝕠𝕨 𝕎𝕠𝕦𝕝𝕕 𝕋𝕙𝕖𝕪 𝔾𝕠 𝔸𝕓𝕠𝕦𝕥 ℂ𝕠𝕦𝕣𝕥𝕚𝕟𝕘 𝕆𝕣 𝔸𝕡𝕡𝕣𝕠𝕒𝕔𝕙𝕚𝕟𝕘 𝕋𝕙𝕖𝕚𝕣 𝔻𝕒𝕣𝕝𝕚𝕟𝕘?
He doesn’t really understand privacy, and since you live under his roof, no matter how unwilling you are, he believes that he should be able to come and go as he pleases. He’ll just come in whenever. If you’re in the bathroom or changing he doesn’t care. When he needs to tell you something he needs to tell you something.
𝕄 - 𝕄𝕒𝕤𝕜, 𝔸𝕣𝕖 𝕋𝕙𝕖𝕚𝕣 𝕋𝕣𝕦𝕖 ℂ𝕠𝕝𝕠𝕣𝕤 𝔻𝕣𝕒𝕤𝕥𝕚𝕔𝕒𝕝𝕝𝕪 𝔻𝕚𝕗𝕗𝕖𝕣𝕖𝕟𝕥 𝔽𝕣𝕠𝕞 𝕋𝕙𝕖 𝕎𝕒𝕪 𝕋𝕙𝕖𝕪 𝔸𝕔𝕥 𝔸𝕣𝕠𝕦𝕟𝕕 𝔼𝕧𝕖𝕣𝕪𝕠𝕟𝕖 𝔼𝕝𝕤𝕖?
When he goes out as Shazam he doesn’t really need to be rough with people unless they’re criminals. He’s quite transparent but he’s a lot more mature. He’s very friendly but he’s more affection around you.
ℕ - ℕ𝕒𝕦𝕘𝕙𝕥𝕪, ℍ𝕠𝕨 𝕎𝕠𝕦𝕝𝕕 𝕋𝕙𝕖𝕪 ℙ𝕦𝕟𝕚𝕤𝕙 𝕋𝕙𝕖𝕚𝕣 𝔻𝕒𝕣𝕝𝕚𝕟𝕘?
If you still act up after all of these years, then maybe you need to see just how helpless you are. He’ll murder people in front of you. He might comfort you if you begin to cry, but he considers it necessary in every aspect.
𝕆 - 𝕆𝕡𝕡𝕣𝕖𝕤𝕤𝕚𝕠𝕟, ℍ𝕠𝕨 𝕄𝕒𝕟𝕪 ℝ𝕚𝕘𝕙𝕥𝕤 𝕎𝕠𝕦𝕝𝕕 𝕋𝕙𝕖𝕪 𝕋𝕒𝕜𝕖 𝔸𝕨𝕒𝕪 𝔽𝕣𝕠𝕞 𝕋𝕙𝕖𝕚𝕣 𝔻𝕒𝕣𝕝𝕚𝕟𝕘?
He would take away your name. If you were able to walk around with him in public, without drawing attention, he’d change your name and all of your looks. He couldn’t have anyone taking away the mother of his children/future children.
ℙ - ℙ𝕒𝕥𝕚𝕖𝕟𝕔𝕖, ℍ𝕠𝕨 ℙ𝕒𝕥𝕚𝕖𝕟𝕥 𝔸𝕣𝕖 𝕋𝕙𝕖𝕪 𝕎𝕚𝕥𝕙 𝕋𝕙𝕖𝕚𝕣 𝔻𝕒𝕣𝕝𝕚𝕟𝕘?
Now that your both older his left over patience has vanished. He’s matured, why can’t you?! He has no tolerance to deal with your ‘childish’ behavior.
ℚ - ℚ𝕦𝕚𝕥, 𝕀𝕗 𝕋𝕙𝕖𝕚𝕣 𝔻𝕒𝕣𝕝𝕚𝕟𝕘 𝔻𝕚𝕖𝕤, 𝕃𝕖𝕒𝕧𝕖𝕤, 𝕆𝕣 𝕊𝕦𝕔𝕔𝕖𝕤𝕤𝕗𝕦𝕝𝕝𝕪 𝔼𝕤𝕔𝕒𝕡𝕖𝕤, 𝕎𝕠𝕦𝕝𝕕 𝕋𝕙𝕖𝕪 𝔼𝕧𝕖𝕣 𝔹𝕖 𝔸𝕓𝕝𝕖 𝕋𝕠 𝕄𝕠𝕧𝕖 𝕆𝕟?
If you die, he’ll bring you back from the dead every time. And each time he does, you’ll be watched more and more. If you escape you’re still gonna need to run fast and far. You as well need to change very thing about yourself. Even your actions. He would still only move on for his family’s sake.
ℝ - ℝ𝕖𝕘𝕣𝕖𝕥, 𝕎𝕠𝕦𝕝𝕕 𝕋𝕙𝕖𝕪 𝔼𝕧𝕖𝕣 𝔽𝕖𝕖𝕝 𝔾𝕦𝕚𝕝𝕥𝕪 𝔸𝕓𝕠𝕦𝕥 𝔸𝕓𝕕𝕦𝕔𝕥𝕚𝕟𝕘 𝕋𝕙𝕖𝕚𝕣 𝔻𝕒𝕣𝕝𝕚𝕟𝕘? 𝕎𝕠𝕦𝕝𝕕 𝕋𝕙𝕖𝕪 𝔼𝕧𝕖𝕣 𝕃𝕖𝕥 𝕋𝕙𝕖𝕚𝕣 𝔻𝕒𝕣𝕝𝕚𝕟𝕘 𝔾𝕠?
He’s been through hell and back. There’s no possible way that he would want you to go through that, and in his mind, the only way to prevent that is by keeping you with him forever. Saying that, he would never let you go.
𝕊 - 𝕊𝕥𝕚𝕘𝕞𝕒, 𝕎𝕙𝕒𝕥 𝔹𝕣𝕠𝕦𝕘𝕙𝕥 𝔸𝕓𝕠𝕦𝕥 𝕋𝕙𝕚𝕤 𝕊𝕚𝕕𝕖 𝕆𝕗 𝕋𝕙𝕖𝕞 (ℂ𝕙𝕚𝕝𝕕𝕙𝕠𝕠𝕕, ℂ𝕦𝕣𝕚𝕠𝕤𝕚𝕥𝕪, 𝔼𝕥𝕔)?
He’s always had family problems. Since he was young and sometimes to this day. He did everything as a kid to prevent this cruel event to hurt you so he took you. You still will never have to face the kind of pain he was put through. His main goal is/was to protect you.
𝕋 - 𝕋𝕖𝕒𝕣𝕤, ℍ𝕠𝕨 𝔻𝕠 𝕋𝕙𝕖𝕪 𝔽𝕖𝕖𝕝 𝔸𝕓𝕠𝕦𝕥 𝕊𝕖𝕖𝕚𝕟𝕘 𝕋𝕙𝕖𝕚𝕣 𝔻𝕒𝕣𝕝𝕚𝕟𝕘 𝕊𝕔𝕣𝕖𝕒𝕞, ℂ𝕣𝕪, 𝔸𝕟𝕕/𝕆𝕣 𝕀𝕤𝕠𝕝𝕒𝕥𝕖 𝕋𝕙𝕖𝕞𝕤𝕖𝕝𝕧𝕖𝕤?
If you scream at him he’ll try his hardest to not throw a fit, but he will if it’ll get you to stop drawing unnecessary attention to yourself. If you cry he’ll talk to you about how wonderful life is and how everything will be okay. He’ll even rub your back and massage your shoulder for some bonus points. If you isolate yourself, you’re gonna have to suck that pain up. He needs you their for him and your future/current kids.
𝕌 - 𝕌𝕟𝕚𝕢𝕦𝕖, 𝕎𝕠𝕦𝕝𝕕 𝕋𝕙𝕖𝕪 𝔻𝕠 𝔸𝕟𝕪𝕥𝕙𝕚𝕟𝕘 𝔻𝕚𝕗𝕗𝕖𝕣𝕖𝕟𝕥 𝔽𝕣𝕠𝕞 𝕋𝕙𝕖 ℂ𝕝𝕒𝕤𝕤𝕚𝕔 𝕐𝕒𝕟𝕕𝕖𝕣𝕖?
Considering that he lets you out after ten years is surprising on its own. Let alone the benefits of being able to go place you’ve never been too.
𝕍 -𝕍𝕚𝕔𝕖: 𝕎𝕙𝕒𝕥 𝕎𝕖𝕒𝕜𝕟𝕖𝕤𝕤 ℂ𝕒𝕟 𝕋𝕙𝕖𝕚𝕣 𝔻𝕒𝕣𝕝𝕚𝕟𝕘 𝔼𝕩𝕡𝕝𝕠𝕚𝕥 𝕀𝕟 𝕆𝕣𝕕𝕖𝕣 𝕋𝕠 𝔼𝕤𝕔𝕒𝕡𝕖?
If you want to escape him you can just honestly escape his house or, when you’re in public, go to the bathroom and sneak out of the window. Considering all the woman in the bathroom would freak the fuck out, it would give you more time to escape.
𝕎 - 𝕎𝕚𝕥’𝕤 𝔼𝕟𝕕, 𝕎𝕠𝕦𝕝𝕕 𝕋𝕙𝕖𝕪 𝔼𝕧𝕖𝕣 ℍ𝕦𝕣𝕥 𝕋𝕙𝕖𝕚𝕣 𝔻𝕒𝕣𝕝𝕚𝕟𝕘?
He’s grown a lot and finds that hurting you emotionally will give him more of a benefit than hurting you physically. He’s kind of selfish when it comes to this aspect.
𝕏 - 𝕏𝕠𝕒𝕟𝕠𝕟, ℍ𝕠𝕨 𝕄𝕦𝕔𝕙 𝕎𝕠𝕦𝕝𝕕 𝕋𝕙𝕖𝕪 ℝ𝕖𝕧𝕖𝕣𝕖 𝕆𝕣 𝕎𝕠𝕣𝕤𝕙𝕚𝕡 𝕋𝕙𝕖𝕚𝕣 𝔻𝕒𝕣𝕝𝕚𝕟𝕘? 𝕋𝕠 𝕎𝕙𝕒𝕥 𝕃𝕖𝕟𝕘𝕥𝕙 𝕎𝕠𝕦𝕝𝕕 𝕋𝕙𝕖𝕪 𝔾𝕠 𝕋𝕠 𝕎𝕚𝕟 𝕋𝕙𝕖𝕚𝕣 𝔻𝕒𝕣𝕝𝕚𝕟𝕘 𝕆𝕧𝕖𝕣?
He worships a lot of the things you do. Knowing that he was able to turn you into a strong and beautiful woman warms his heart. He’s your husband so he knows that he doesn’t HAVE to win you over, but will anyway.
𝕐 - 𝕐𝕖𝕒𝕣𝕟, ℍ𝕠𝕨 𝕃𝕠𝕟𝕘 𝔻𝕠 𝕋𝕙𝕖𝕪 ℙ𝕚𝕟𝕖 𝔸𝕗𝕥𝕖𝕣 𝕋𝕙𝕖𝕚𝕣 𝔻𝕒𝕣𝕝𝕚𝕟𝕘 𝔹𝕖𝕗𝕠𝕣𝕖 𝕋𝕙𝕖𝕪 𝕊𝕟𝕒𝕡?
When he first met you, which keep in mind was ten years ago, he took you once you hurt yourself. You were so fragile back than, and he couldn’t find it in himself to stand and watch you or others hurt you.
ℤ - ℤ𝕖𝕟𝕚𝕥𝕙, 𝕎𝕠𝕦𝕝𝕕 𝕋𝕙𝕖𝕪 𝔼𝕧𝕖𝕣 𝔹𝕣𝕖𝕒𝕜 𝕋𝕙𝕖𝕚𝕣 𝔻𝕒𝕣𝕝𝕚𝕟𝕘?
Only emotionally. He definitely needs you with him, so harming you is harming himself. Plus he gains your love and partial affection if he harms you enough emotionally.
Written: Friday, September 15, 2023
18 notes · View notes
astroyongie · 9 months
Text
Everglow October Reading 2023
Note: please take it lightly and enjoy <3
Sihyeon
Love: She is coming out of a breakup and at the moment she is still going through all the whiplash from the hurt that this breakup is giving her. Sihyeon isn’t in her best condition and I believe that her heartbreak is actually causing her physical symptoms. 
Career: She is limiting herself a lot. I don’t think her career is something she is passionate about and more like a work she has to do to receive money. She is very organized on what she has to do, but she feels like she doesn’t have a lot to do anyways 
Self: She has so many priorities in her life that she sometimes doesn’t know what to choose or what to start with. She jungles a lot between things and I hope that her erratic way of living will find balance so it doesn’t impact her health 
E:U
Love: She is dating someone at the moment, probably an old friend of hers or someone who has always been around her. This person isn’t an artist or working in the industry. In any case, she is very happy with them and they have a rather stable thing 
Career: Things seem to be going relatively good. She has strong support inside the company and he is very close to her manager, which helps her create a good working environment and a rather stable and healthy relationship with everyone else who works with her 
Self: She lacks self-esteem and she doesn’t believe she is that good to be an idol (she thinks people only like her for her looks). EU have probably some type of impostor syndrome and I also see that she isn’t really a truthful person, almost like she keeps secrets all the time and lies rather easily to others 
Mia
Love: She is single and not looking for love relationships at the moment. Mia likes her independence and she rather stays that way. However she does talk and flirt with some people through her media and text, but that’s about it 
Career: I believe that there’s a male energy in her life in the workspace that is extremely manipulative towards her and makes sure to always put her first among other members (which creates a lot of conflict). This person is also emotionally abusive and very moody but the thing is that his energy goes through Mia. So rather than taking action, she too gets muddy and manipulative toward members when work is related 
Self: She isn’t on her best days. I see that she went through a lot mentally and still today she fights against her mental health as she tries to improve. I also see that a major event happened in her life that caused her to completely sink when it comes to depressive states. Something she hasn’t healed yet 
Onda
Love: I believe she is in a relationship with an idol but things are a little complicated here. The person she is with is very impulsive and hast, they want to do things always like they want and quickly, pushing her through her boundaries. Onda has been ruthless with her high expectations and only gives these people what they want if they exceed her expectations 
Career: The way she has been saving money is no joke. Every time she receives something from her work or her company she keeps it away and tries her best to have some financial background to help her out. Onda is scared to have to go through other difficult times financially 
Self: She has been a little bit lost lately. I don’t think she knows what she wants for herself, for her career, or just for her family and her future in general. Onda feels like simply following the flow and the rules and she hasn’t been thinking about herself. 
Aisha
Love: Rather happy, Aisha is in a relationship that lasts for a long time now and everything seems to be going very well for her. She is happy, healthy and her relationship is stable and it seems that it’s meant to continue as it is
Career: She has been very inspired, almost like she wants to work and do her own lyrics and stuff for the group. But she is also a little bit impulsive with what she does and some people might not like how she works 
Self: Moving forward with her life, she doesn’t dwell on her past or on things that have happened to her. She tries her best to keep going and leaving what isn’t necessary for her behind her 
Yiren
Love: She is still healing from her breakup earlier this year (with that 4th gen idol) and things with her love life as just erratic since her relations with Korea aren’t the best at the moment and it does seem that all that concerns her heart is giving her more headaches than joy 
Career: Her career seems to be going well, mostly because she receives so many opportunities and projects to work on (mostly in China) and the money they pay is way better than in Korea. Yiren has also been generous and helping those in need (friends and family). 
Self: She has been having a lot of arguments and disagreements with people around her (friends, family, co-workers, etc). It seems like Yiren has a hard time communicating with people and making her voice heard
19 notes · View notes