#so they just accumulate. And i look at the list. whining.

[icharchivist]

Out of curiosity, how many FEs do you have to read? I currently have 45

I really need to set aside some time for that, that's so many potential crystals

ahah i actually answered an ask similar to that earlier today!

but the long story short is that there's 390 FE unread in my FE tab (which are almost all skill FEs, bc i skipped all of the crystal ones. There's a few misc FE like cross-FE or the eternal stuff on the list though).

and there's plenty of FE i skipped, for crystals' sake, or for skills sake. I haven't really made the count but in terms of skipped FEs i need to come back to, i have a few hundreds to read as well.

My "to read" list is a little less big in the sense that there's characters i really want to read so they're high in my priority list, but, yeah.

This is the reason i procrastinate those so badly, i just have. Too many of them. One day i'll manage to sort through it all but. yeah. OTL.

Good luck on your read list though!! you can do it!!! cheering for you!

[punkshort]

Home

Pairing: (Hallmark) Joel Miller x f!reader

Summary: You finally move in with Joel and Sarah.

Warnings: language, fluff (the cheesy hallmark kind), established relationship, reader has a previously explained nickname, smut (18+ MDNI), oral (f!receiving), unprotected piv sex

WC: 4.8K

Series Masterlist

Dividers by the lovely @saradika-graphics

Joel was nervous. He never really got nervous, but that particular day, he was nervous.

Sure, it was a big step in your relationship. Or maybe it was because months ago when he asked your father's permission to marry you, he promised he would wait until you moved in together.

And now, that day had arrived.

Where did the time go? He swore it just flew right on by, time that was filled with memories of dinners, parties, dates and holidays together. He hadn't planned what he would say and he felt woefully unprepared. He hadn't even talked to Sarah about it yet.

Just because today is the day you're moving in doesn't mean today is the day I need to ask, he thought to himself. Still, it was a big step. A big, symbolic gesture on both your ends. One that screamed, I'm in this for the long haul.

"Mornin', babygirl," Joel said sleepily as he entered the kitchen, Sarah already sitting at the table in front of an empty bowl and scrolling quietly on her phone.

"Hey," she responded distractedly. He poured himself a cup of coffee and looked around the room. It would be the last morning in his kitchen that didn't include you, and the thought made warmth bloom in his chest and excitement flicker under his skin.

"Big day," he said, but Sarah only nodded. "Y'know, been meanin' to talk to you 'bout somethin'."

She pulled her gaze up from her phone and cocked her head to the side. "Yeah?"

He nodded and took a deep breath before sitting across the table from her. He told her it was about you and she sat back in her chair.

"Bucky?"

He nodded, the silly nickname coming from his daughter's lips that only previously came from your immediate family making him smile.

"You know I'm cool with her moving in, we talked about it months ago. I think it's great. She's amazing and we have so much fun-"

"It's not that," he said, cutting her off before he lost his nerve. "One day - and I ain't sayin' today - but one day, I wanna ask her to marry me."

Sarah just continued to stare blankly at him, so he continued.

"I love her so much, babygirl. She means so much to me, 'n so does her family. I can't imagine my life, our life, without her."

"Yeah, duh," she replied, giving him an incredulous look. "Obviously if she's moving in I figured that would be the next step."

He frowned. "You did?"

"Dad," she whined, rolling her eyes. "I'm seventeen now. Soon, I'll be in college. I want you to be happy. I don't want to worry about you being sad and alone when I'm gone."

"Gee, thanks," he scoffed over his mug, and she giggled.

"What I'm saying is, I think it's great. Go for it. She'll totally say yes."

He scratched the back of his neck nervously. "Yeah?"

Sarah gave him a deadpan look. "Yes, Dad. She's moving in with you. She's not expecting friendship bracelets."

He smirked and looked down at his coffee. One thing was checked off the list, now he had to think about when and how he would ask you.

It was a long day.

You hadn't even lived in Texas for a full year yet but you managed to accumulate a lot more shit than you thought. Fortunately, between Joel, Tommy, your dad and Josh, your brother in law, all the furniture was quickly unloaded. The time consuming part was working out the angles in hallways and stairs. Since Joel and Sarah already had more than enough furniture, the two of you decided to put your old couch and television in the basement, an idea which Sarah excitedly jumped on board with.

You could hear the men grunting and talking through different ideas on how to get your couch into the basement all the way from Joel's - your - bedroom upstairs with Sarah.

"I am obsessed with this purse," Sarah sighed, tossing a red leather Michael Kors tote over her shoulder. Prior to living in Texas, you lived in New York City and had created quite the collection of designer clothes and accessories thanks mostly to your ex-fiancé. Since moving, you found very little use for most of it and your style evolved to one that was much more relaxed and comfortable. More you.

"Keep it," you told her as you opened up a box of your bathroom things. She gawked at you while you began to drag the box towards the bathroom, already smiling to yourself as you thought about Joel seeing all the girly face masks and perfumes cluttering his once rather masculine space.

"Are you serious?"

You glanced up at her and shrugged. "Sure. I haven't used it in a year and I have plenty more. It's all yours."

"Oh, my god," she murmured, holding the bag close to her chest. "Thank you!"

You grinned and pulled out bottles of shampoo and conditioner. "Don't mention it."

There was a loud thud that came from the basement and you both froze, waiting to hear panicked calls for help, but after a moment laughter erupted amongst the men and you both exchanged looks of relief.

"I bet Dad that Uncle Tommy would be the one to hurt himself," she told you, crouching to help unpack more of your toiletries.

You laughed and shook your head. "You're probably right."

Glancing at the time, you stood up and weaved your way through the boxes littering the floor to grab your wallet laying on the bed.

"Would you mind calling in a couple pizzas for delivery?" you asked Sarah, handing her your credit card. She nodded and patted down her pants.

"Shoot. I think I left my phone in my room," she said as she headed towards the door. "Ronny's Pizza, right?"

"Yeah, that's good," you called after her before stubbing your toe on a half empty cardboard box. "Shit," you muttered angrily, then squat down to scoop up what was left in the box and get it out of your way.

Wrestling with an armful of socks and bras, you carefully made your way to the dresser and yanked open a drawer. You mistakenly had opened Joel's underwear drawer instead of the one he had emptied for you, but right as you were about to close it, something caught your eye. Was that...? Slowly, you reached forward and nudged a pair of boxers out of the way so you could get a better look.

Your eyes went wide and your heart jumped into your throat when you saw the small, black velvet box nestled between his things. The fingers holding up the pair of underwear began to shake and you nervously swallowed the lump in your throat.

Maybe it was a class ring.

Maybe it was a piece of his mom's jewelry he saved for Sarah.

Or maybe it was a fucking engagement ring.

You heard creaking on the stairs and you quickly dropped the boxers back over the box and slammed the drawer shut. By the time Joel entered the room, you had successfully found your drawer and were halfway done putting your clothes away.

"Hey, darlin'," he murmured, sidling up behind you. He buried his nose in your shoulder and slowly circled his arms around your waist.

"Hey, yourself," you replied, hoping your voice sounded normal and he couldn't feel your heart slamming in your chest. Already got the ring he had said to you drunkenly the night before your sister gave birth. "How are things going down there?" you asked, trying to refocus and get your mind off what you just saw.

Joel breathed in deep and began to sway you both back and forth. "Good. Everythin's all set. Got a nice man cave set up now."

You giggled and closed your drawer before turning around in his arms. "Man cave, huh?"

"That's right," he said softly with a grin. "Gonna be great in 'nother month when football season starts."

"I don't know, I think Sarah was already making plans to have her girlfriends over down there. Might cramp your man cave style," you told him, arms draping loosely around his neck.

"'S'alright, I just give her a hundred bucks and let her borrow the car and then it's all mine," he murmured, pressing a soft kiss against your throat. "Be nice to have some privacy down there, too," he added, tilting his head in the other direction so he could give the other side of your neck the same attention.

"Yeah? Privacy for what?" you teased, chin lifting up to give him better access. You felt him chuckle against your skin.

"For anythin' we want," he replied, tearing his mouth away from your shoulder so he could brush his lips gently over yours.

"Mmm, like board games?" you asked, giggling when his lips froze and his face pulled away, giving you a look of disbelief.

"Is that what we're callin' it?"

You nodded and stretched onto your tiptoes so you could kiss him again.

"Okay, the pizza'll be here - oh. Gross," Sarah said when she appeared in the doorway. You pulled away and grinned while Joel looked over his shoulder with a frown.

"Gross?" he repeated, voice laced with disgust. "Seein' me happy is gross?"

Sarah rolled her eyes as she navigated the minefield of boxes in the room to hand you back your credit card. "Is this what it's gonna be like now? You guys sucking face in every room?"

"Hate to tell you, kiddo, but it's always been that way," you told her as you dropped your arms from around Joel's neck to take your card back.

"Pizza?" he questioned excitedly as if he just processed what Sarah said, and you nodded.

"Figured you guys would be hungry."

Joel groaned in delight and wrapped his arms around you once again, making you laugh.

"Alright, gimme a second to leave at least," Sarah said, turning towards the door as quickly as possible, but not before you caught the smile on her face.

"Hey, can I give you a hand?" Tommy asked as he entered your kitchen. You could hear Josh, your father, Sarah and Joel laughing in the living room with the television on in the background.

"Oh, Tommy, that's so sweet but I got it. You've done so much already today, thank you for your help," you said with a smile as you continued to clean up the pizza. Tommy leaned against the counter and watched you move around his brother's kitchen like you had been there your whole life, and he couldn't help but smile.

"You look right at home already," he told you, making your cheeks warm. You pulled out some foil and shrugged.

"I've stayed over a couple times, what can I say?"

He chuckled and continued to watch you work quietly for a moment.

"Say, what'dya think 'bout you and Joel goin' on a double date with me and Maria?"

"Oh, I would love that!" you exclaimed, meeting his gaze briefly as you moved towards the fridge. "Must be getting serious if you're ready to introduce her to family, huh?"

"Yeah, I think so," Tommy said, shyly looking down at the tile floor. "She's so pretty. Smart, too. And funny. We have such a great time together. I'll tell you, I ain't ever remember feelin' this way 'bout a girl before."

Your jaw hung open in shock after you turned away from the closed fridge. "Tommy! This is... amazing!"

He scratched the back of his neck and grinned. "Yeah, it is," he agreed warmly.

"He botherin' you, baby?" Joel asked as he strolled into the kitchen with a beer in his hand. He shot you a wink right after Tommy gave him the finger.

"I was just telling Tommy we should go on a double date with him and Maria," you said, leaning into the hug he gave you. Tommy gave you a thumbs up behind Joel's back and you smiled over his shoulder, knowing intuitively that his brother would tease him mercilessly if he knew Tommy was the one with the idea instead of you.

"Oh, yeah?" Joel asked, pulling back to look at Tommy. He nodded.

"Yeah, sounds like fun. Maybe grab some drinks down at Mike's. Play some pool."

"Alright. Set it up, can't wait to meet her," Joel told him before squeezing past you to get another beer from the refrigerator.

The men spent another hour or so relaxing in the living room while you and Sarah did the best you could to clear up the remaining boxes in your bedroom. You did rather well, too. By the time everyone was ready to say good night, you only had two boxes left, both of which you stacked and shoved into a corner to deal with the next day.

You were looking forward to collapsing into bed after a long, eventful day when Sarah asked if she could go to the movies with a few of her friends.

"Please, Dad? School starts up in a couple weeks," she begged, and Joel didn't have the heart to tell her she didn't need to bother to beg. He handed her some money from his wallet and she rushed up to her bedroom to get ready, announcing her friend Katy would pick her up in twenty minutes.

"Strange how Katy knew to pick her up before I said it was alright," Joel told you with a fake look of confusion. You laughed and plopped next to him on the couch, resting your head on his shoulder while he flipped through the channels on the television.

You wrapped your hand around his bicep and snuggled in closer as he wavered back and forth between two different action movies. When you really thought about it, it was funny. Your life was so different just a year ago. You were engaged to someone else, living in New York City, wearing expensive clothes and dining at restaurants you didn't really care for but your fiancé did, so you pretended to like them, too. Now you were living a completely different life. One of comfort and love and joy and you had never felt happier.

As if he could read your mind, Joel lifted his arm and tugged you closer by the shoulders, then planted a kiss on the top of your head, further emphasizing how perfect your life seemed now.

"I'm coming downstairs now! Stop making out!" Sarah warned as she stomped down the steps. You stifled your laughter and Joel shot her a scowl.

"We're just watchin' TV."

"And I'm just covering my bases," she said with a grin, holding her hands up in surrender. A faint beep came from the road and she grabbed the purse you had given her earlier that day and said, "don't wait up!" over her shoulder before the door clicked shut.

"Don't wait up?" Joel repeated with a snort. "She's seventeen goin' on thirty."

You giggled and gazed up at him from your place against his side. "You wanna play some board games?"

He looked confused for a moment before the realization dawned on him.

"Hell, yes."

The basement looked nicer than you expected. It wasn't completely finished but there was an area Joel had built a wall around and painted years ago. He had installed a drop ceiling and some laminate flooring but he never got around to actually doing much else with it until you moved in and had extra furniture. An area rug from your old apartment was in the center of the room, your old couch resting on top and your television was placed on your entertainment center across from the sofa. You had some floor lamps and end tables you could arrange in the space later on but for now, it was nice.

But all that didn't really matter that particular day. Not when your shorts dangled around one ankle, which was slung over the back of the couch, your legs spread wide as Joel kneeled on the area rug, his fingers gripping your hips as his tongue feverishly lapped at your pussy.

"Fuck, Joel... I'm close," you whined, hand clawing at his hair, your hips grinding shamelessly against his face. He just groaned, eyes fluttering closed as he drank you in, your scent engulfing him, absolutely loving the way you fell apart under his tongue.

"Joel," you gasped, mouth hung open as your gaze fixed on the top of his head. "Joel, d-do t-that thing-" you moaned loudly, cutting yourself off when he repeatedly grazed his teeth over your clit while working two fingers into your cunt, curling them so they pressed against that one spot he knew drove you crazy each time he dragged them in and out.

A moment later, your body went rigid and tears sprung to your eyes as you came, ragged groans melting into quiet little whimpers until he finally pulled away from the center of your thighs. His eyes were dark and wild as he panted for air, watching you with a cocky smirk as you struggled to come to your senses.

"Gonna let me fuck you now, baby?" he murmured, his pants already pushed halfway down his legs. You nodded in a daze, thighs trembling still when he stepped out of his jeans and kneeled onto the couch. He hovered over you, pressing his thick length against your pussy while he bent forward to bite and suck at your throat.

You gasped sharply and grabbed his shoulders when he first entered you. The initial stretch always took your breath away, regardless if he made you come first or not. You came to crave that feeling, those first few seconds of intrusion that made your mind go blank and your heart stutter before your body made room for him and relaxed. And because you knew he loved to hear it, your mouth found his ear and you whimpered, "so big," and you smiled when you heard his responding growl.

A few days before you moved in with Joel, you laid awake at night in your apartment, thinking back to your relationship before him. When you moved in with Will, it seemed like something shifted almost immediately, and not in a good way. The spark fizzled out as you adjusted to living with one another, putting up with each other's quirks and bad habits. Logically, you knew that spark was dying before you moved in together but at the time, you didn't want to admit it. But anxiety still crept up and you wondered if the same thing would happen with Joel.

What a stupid thing to worry about.

What you had with Joel was so different, it was hard to describe. But it was a feeling, something deep inside that couldn't be denied. This was special. This was unlike anything you ever experienced before and it was foolish to try to compare it to anything else.

As if you needed further proof, Joel sensed your mind had drifted elsewhere and he nipped at your lower lip to draw your attention back to him.

"What's wrong?" he whispered when you met his gaze. His hips had slowed down, worried you were uncomfortable and didn't want to say it. You slowly smiled and draped your arms around his neck, looking up at him with such love and adoration that he couldn't stop himself from smiling in return.

"Nothing's wrong. Everything's perfect," you told him. You tugged him down so you could give him a kiss, then mumbled, "you're perfect," against his mouth.

Joel flushed and shook his head gently, resuming his steady pace. Sometimes he had a hard time believing you were real. He spent a good chunk of his adult life thinking he would never find true love and after a few years of loneliness, he grew to accept that. He threw himself into his work and focused on raising Sarah but when he met you, it was like everything changed. He couldn't stop thinking about you to the point where he would have been content with just getting to know you better, but the moment he first felt your lips against his, he knew he didn't stand a chance. But when he first made love to you, it was all over. He knew within seconds he could never let you go, and he never did.

"You're the one who's perfect. God, so fuckin' tight," he groaned, flexing his hips with a little more force. You rewarded him with a sweet little moan and tipped your head back into the couch. "That feel good, baby?" he breathed, watching with pride as you writhed underneath him.

"Yeah," you whispered before sinking your teeth into your lower lip, skin already red and sensitive from where his own teeth had laid claim. "Again. Harder, Joel," you pleaded, and his eyelids fluttered as he tried to slow down his own orgasm that was already growing all too quickly.

He gave you what you wanted, hips snapping into yours roughly. Your whole body rocked beneath him, breasts bouncing free under your thin T-shirt, jaw slack and back arched so beautifully he had to look away before he came too soon.

"Oh, fuck, Joel," you whined, face pinching as he forced another orgasm to the surface with each powerful thrust.

"You like that?" he murmured, his dark eyes raking over your body greedily. "Tell me, baby. C'mon, wanna hear it."

"Yes," you whimpered, eyes still screwed shut, "feel so fucking good, Joel, fuck... so... so deep, I want more." You took in a deep breath, your release so close you could taste it. "More... don't stop, please... I-I need..." you were rambling now, unable to form a full sentence, barely aware you were saying anything at all and fuck, did he love being the one to make you do that. Make you lose control and give in, putting all your faith and trust in him to give you what you want. To make you feel good.

"I know what you need," he said through gritted teeth, then grabbed ahold of your hip and ground himself roughly against your cunt. Your eyes flew open and he smiled when you cried out, clenching around him after only two or three passes over your clit.

You were whispering his name mixed with something else incoherent as you came down and he couldn't hold himself back any longer. He slammed into you over and over, eyes fixed on the way your pussy strained around his girth, his cock all shiny and slick with your arousal and he came with a loud groan, thrusting into you deep and slow until he was spent.

His arms began to tremble so he slowly lowered himself down to rest the side of his head against your chest and instantly, your hands came up to card through his hair. He sighed and closed his eyes, soaking in your gentle touch as his heart began to slow.

"Do you think it will always be like this?" you asked softly, fingers still threading through his curls.

"Yeah, I do," Joel replied, eyes still shut as he nuzzled into your chest.

"Good. Me, too."

Maria was fun.

You knew immediately you would get along. Her sense of humor and her carefree attitude completely contradicted her profession as a newly appointed Assistant District Attorney, and you absolutely loved how full of surprises she was, especially how good she was at pool.

"Y'know, we just let you girls win," Joel teased when he put his pool cue down.

"Oh, yeah? Is that why I heard you and Tommy talking strategy on my way back from the bathroom?" you shot back. He grinned and tugged you into his chest, kissing the crown of your head before releasing you.

"C'mon, Tommy. Losers buy the next round," he said, giving his younger brother a playful shove. Tommy squeezed Maria's hand and gave her a warm smile before following Joel to the bar, leaving just you two to find an empty table. Maria spotted one right when a group of four were standing up to leave and she grabbed your arm, practically dragging you across the crowded floor to snag it before someone else did.

"Good eye!" you told her when you slid into the booth, the green, plastic cushion underneath you essentially useless after years of being flattened and never replaced. The table was sticky from spilled beer and droplets of hot sauce, so you each got to work yanking handfuls of napkins out of the dispenser at the end of the table and squirting hand sanitizer over the tabletop to clean the area as best you could.

"I don't think Tommy told me how long you two've been together," Maria said, her eyes lifting to search the bar for your dates.

"Uh, eight months or so," you told her, "we met right before Christmas."

She raised her eyebrows and smiled. "I would have guessed much longer. It feels like you know each other so well."

You could feel your cheeks warm from the compliment. It was clear to you what you had with Joel was special but it was always nice to hear others could see it, too.

"What about you and Tommy? He's been keeping you a secret but I want to guess... two months?"

"Three, actually," she corrected you. "We both agreed to take things slow. I had just gotten this job and I knew I would be putting in long hours, I wasn't really sure if I had the time to devote to a relationship but he stuck it out. I really thought he was going to bail when I kept having to call it early so many nights and cancel dates last minute but he's a trooper."

You leaned across the table and wiggled your eyebrows at her. "That's 'cause he really likes you."

She giggled and waved you off but you could see the delight in her eyes.

"I'm serious! I've only known him for as long as I've known Joel but from what I was told, Tommy didn't bring girls around often. Especially lately. You must be special," you teased, making her smile widen.

Unbeknownst to you, across the bar, Tommy and Joel were having a similar conversation.

Now that Tommy had a few beers in him, he was more open to telling his brother about Maria and how happy he was with her.

"I'm tellin' you, Joel, I think she's the one," he was saying, slamming down an empty shot glass next to Joel's on the messy bar top.

"I like her, she keeps you in line," Joel quipped, taking a sip from his beer to chase the shot of whiskey. "Girls are gettin' along real good, too."

Tommy nodded and looked across the bar. "And how's things goin' with you two? She wanna move out yet?"

Joel laughed and shook his head. "Nah, it's only been two weeks. It'll probably take at least a month 'fore she realizes she made a mistake," he joked.

Tommy chuckled but caught the fond look in Joel's eye when he thought about you.

"So, you think this is it for us?" he asked, and Joel glanced up from his beer. "We finally found the ones?"

The corner of his mouth pulled up into a smirk and he nodded.

"Hope so." Then maybe he was feeling a little braver, or maybe it was the alcohol, but he added, "got the ring already, be a little tough tryin' to take it back."

Tommy's eyes bugged out of his head. "You - what?"

Joel sucked in a deep breath and nodded. "Yep. Had it for a while now. Asked Paul 'n everythin'."

Tommy's mouth opened and closed like a fish, completely stunned.

"And Sarah?"

He nodded and took a nervous sip from his bottle. "Talked to her, too. She's thrilled."

Tommy broke out into a huge grin and tugged Joel into a quick hug before pulling away and giving him a playful shoulder shove. "So when are you gonna do it?"

Joel sighed and looked around. "I don't know. When it feels right, I suppose."

"Shit," Tommy replied, rubbing his chin. "Gonna be a hell of a year."

Joel nodded and looked down at your drinks sitting on the bar. "We oughta go find the girls."

"Yeah," Tommy agreed, shaking his head like he was snapping out of a trance. He reached for Maria's drink while Joel grabbed yours but before they began to weave their way through the bar, Tommy stopped him.

"Congrats, brother. I'm happy for you."

"She didn't say yes yet," Joel reminded him with a raised eyebrow, but Tommy just shrugged.

"She will."

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[jenneyquinn]

“who do you think you’re impressing with this stuff?”

“everyone. you wouldn’t understand.”

after adjusting his tie, pacifica looks up from dipper’s neck, her blue eyes meeting his brown ones. it’s the very first time she sees him without that lame pine tree cap on, so naturally, her eyes aim a little higher.

upon inspecting the brunette’s tufts of hair, she thinks to herself, he definitely doesn’t shower much, trying her best to not react too visibly to the accumulation of sweat. who knows, making him feel more awkward will just make things worse—after all, that suit must be stuffy enough as it is.

so, she remains indifferent as she continues inspecting his hair. despite a lack of showering, she thinks, he’s lucky to have fluffly hair… for a nerd, i guess.

before she backs off completely, walking back into the party to the ‘problem room’, pacifica notices something about dipper’s forehead. a blemish, perhaps? or maybe, a hint of acne.

acne makes sense for him, trying very hard to roll her eyes at the thought, obviously not the type to spare time for proper skin care, geez.

for all she knew, pacifica soon came to the conclusion that from all that sweat… the pores on his forehead being clogged thanks to his brown hair and that hat of his, she wouldn’t worry much about giving away some facial cleanser, mosturiser, and a trip to pick up some ointment (since she never needed any).

yet, before she could start on a list—first, she needed to know how bad it was.

pushing his hair back, dipper feels his whole body go stiff in a flash. what the heck was she doing?

“i don’t have time to give you a total makeover, but the least i can do is advise you on better personal hygiene.”

pacifica answers, which meant that dipper was definitely thinking out loud.

stupid! now that, he whines in thought, but refrains from physically face-palming himself.

when pacifica fully pushes dipper’s hair back, his forehead now bare to her, she observes it, her face remaining indifferent as she focuses on what lies before her. it’s… a big dipper?

behind that poker face of hers, she’s laughing inside; trying desperately to not let the corners of her lips twinge up and succumb to her amusement.

clearly embarrassed, dipper’s face flushes red, but finds himself staying still as he feels frozen under pacifica’s gaze. his doe-brown eyes are only glued to her diamond-hued irises, then glances a bit down to her glossed lips, awaiting the inevitable mean-girl cackle.

“so that’s why people call you dipper.” pacifica points out softly, showing the smallest hint of a grin on her face.

only, it isn’t malicious—dipper notes to himself. amused, yes, but not in a cruel, insulting way.

feeling awkward enough as it is, dipper breaks away from pacifica’s touch, backing himself away and heading towards the door; laughing inorganically.

“yeah, it’s just a dumb birthmark, started going by dipper so no one could tease me about that anymore, heh,” he tries to explain in a single breath, pulling out the third journal to avoid being further burned in her gaze, “anywaysweshouldgoaheadandfindtheroomwheretheghostwaslastspottedright?”

“i don’t think it’s dumb.”

the confession slips pass pacifica’s lips almost instantly, unable to stop the words from spewing out.

now, they’re both pink in the face, both in disbelief of the blonde’s admission.

[solarmorrigan]

Hands Where I Can See Them, Part 6

Part 1 | Part 2 | Part 3 | Part 4 | Part 5

The days pass like cold mud – slow, uncomfortable, and relentless.

But they do pass.

Eddie had said he could give Steve the time he needed, and he’d meant it; he would wait out the two weeks and be there on the other side to talk to him. To hope for a second chance.

They see each other here and there, mostly in passing: Steve comes to pick a few of the kids up from a gaming session; Eddie stops in at Family Video with Jeff, Gareth, and Oliver to grab a movie (where Jeff and Steve exchange a surprisingly friendly greeting); they occupy separate sides of the room at a group dinner.

Each time, Eddie is sure to at least acknowledge and wave at Steve, in spite of any protective hovering and scowling Robin might be doing if she happens to be present. Steve gives cautious nods in return at first, but as they near the deadline, he’s returning Eddie’s distant greetings with a hesitant smile and that ridiculous little finger-wiggle wave that Eddie had been reluctantly charmed by in the beginning.

And in the meantime, Eddie plots.

He is not, by nature, an optimist (strangely, between the two of them, that’s Steve’s area), but in this instance, he plans for the best: the idea that Steve will say yes and let Eddie take him on a proper date. And as improvisational as Eddie likes to be, he’s also a veteran dungeon master and plotter of all sorts of campaigns; if you want long-term plans to go off without a hitch, it pays to be prepared.

So, he plots.

He brainstorms and makes lists of all of Steve’s favorite things and schemes out elaborate romantic gestures and draws on all the knowledge he’s retained from the romcoms he’d whined about having to watch with Steve but had always given in over when Steve gave him that puppy-eyed look that Eddie has no defense against.

(And somehow, he’d continued to think they were just friends. His lack of awareness should be studied as a scientific anomaly.)

He thinks Steve would be proud of his accumulated work (and Eddie himself isn’t ashamed of it, but all the same, he makes sure to hide the notebook where none of the guys will ever, ever stumble across it, because they would never, ever let Eddie live it down).

In any case, the ticking down of two weeks finally comes to an end, and Eddie stands in front of the phone earlier than he’d normally care to be awake, hoping that his work will pay off.

Steve picks up before the fourth ring, just like he always does, and answers the phone like a dork, just like he always does.

“Harrington residence, Steve speaking.”

This is where Eddie normally makes a joke – says he’d been trying for the funeral home and asks if Steve happens to have a shovel and some time on his hands; says he thought he’d had the number for the Hawkins Gentleman’s Club and asks if Steve is much of a dancer; once, he’d even affected a terrible New York accent and spun some lines about how he’d been trying to call a speakeasy. He can always hear the laughter caught behind Steve’s dry responses to his nonsense, and he always loves it.

But now is not “normally,” and Eddie only just manages to sound like himself as he replies, “Steve. Just the Harrington I was hoping would speak.”

“Eddie,” is all Steve says for a moment; he sounds almost surprised, but not displeased. “Hey.”

“Hey,” Eddie says back. “So, I know punctuality has never been my strong suit, but it’s, uh. It’s been two weeks. Pretty much on the dot. And you said I should come talk to you again, so…”

“Uh, yeah. Yeah, no, did you – You can come over. If you want to talk, still,” Steve says – stammers, really, like he’s been caught off-guard, like he really hadn’t been expecting Eddie to call.

“Well, if I didn’t change my mind in two weeks, I’m not gonna change my mind in the fifteen minutes it takes to get to your house,” Eddie says.

“Sure,” Steve says, a little steadier now. “Yeah, I’ll see you in a bit, I guess.”

“You definitely will,” Eddie assures him. “See you in a bit, Steve.”

“Yeah. Yes. Bye, Eddie.”

It’s awkward, but – it’s something.

The only reason Eddie doesn’t break an egregious number of traffic laws on his way to Steve’s house is because he simply couldn’t bear the irony of getting arrested now, of all times. With his luck, he’d get sent up the river and Steve would be left waiting and waiting at his house before coming to the conclusion that Eddie had never really cared about him after all, only to be found surprised and jaded several years later when Eddie is finally released from prison and makes his first stop the Harrington house and – Christ, Eddie’s had romance on the brain too long. He’s going to have to binge reread Lord of the Rings or something to get his head back on straight.

He pulls his head out of the clouds and his van into the Harrington’s ridiculously massive driveway and heads up to the door with a vibrating surplus of energy sustained entirely by nerves and determination.

It seems like he’s not the only one running on anxiety power, though, based on how quickly the door opens after Eddie rings the bell.

It’s the first time Eddie’s really seen Steve up close since the trailer two weeks ago. He looks– better. He’s still tired, Eddie can tell; he’s got that slightly droopy look around his eyes and an almost painful set to his jaw that’s nearly impossible to spot if you don’t know what to look for – and most people don’t (but Eddie’s spent a lot of time learning Steve, even if he hadn’t picked up all the right tells). But he still looks better, and Eddie finds himself relieved.

“Hey, there,” he says, giving Steve a nod. “Just happened to be in the neighborhood, y’know. Thought I’d drop by.”

Steve shakes his head, a tiny smile quirking up at one corner of his mouth. “Come in, jackass.”

“Fine way to treat your guests,” Eddie drawls in return, gratified when Steve’s smile grows just a tiny bit more.

He takes off his shoes at the entryway (Steve hardly ever asks anyone to take off their shoes, because worrying about the state of your floors isn’t cool, but it bothers him all the same, and so Eddie takes them off) and follows Steve through to the living room, where they both perch awkwardly on the couch and sit in an equally awkward silence for about thirty seconds.

“So… you said I should come talk to you,” Eddie says finally.

“I did, yeah.” Steve nods.

“You said to tell you if this was still something I wanted,” Eddie goes on.

“I did, yeah,” Steve says again. “And… you’re here.”

“I told you I wouldn’t change my mind, Steve.” Eddie’s hand twitches, almost instinctively reaching out for a spot on Steve’s knee, or around his wrist, or threaded through his fingers, but he doesn’t think he can take Steve freezing up or pulling away again. “This – you, us – I still want it. I want to do it right. If you’ll give me the chance, I want to treat you how you should be treated.”

Steve nods. “Okay.”

Eddie blinks. “Okay? As in – just, yeah, okay?” He knows he’s not making much sense, but he’d been sort of prepared to have to make his case – to extol the virtues of the perfect dates he had planned, to sing the praises of all the things he knows now that he should appreciate about Steve, to lament the loss of trust and ease between them, but instead Steve is just sitting there, watching him with a funny sort of smile on his face.

“I was… I was never going to say no, Eddie.” Steve shrugs. “I just really needed you to think about it. To make sure this—a real relationship with… with me—is really what you wanted. Because if it’s not, if you took it back again, I don’t think I’d– I just really needed you to be sure.”

“Steve,” Eddie says, low and serious, “I have never been more sure of anything in my life. A real relationship with you is exactly what I want.”

Steve’s smile twitches, changes into something a little more familiar, a little warmer. “Okay.”

“You’re never gonna regret it, sweetheart,” Eddie says, can’t help bouncing a little in his seat as his nerves turn to excitement, to elation. “I have the corniest, most romantic dates planned, I swear, I’m going to knock your socks off. We’ll unlock your inner Molly Ringwald.”

Rolling his eyes, Steve shakes his head at Eddie. “You really don’t have to do all that. I’m not– putting you through a trial, or whatever, we can just go back to what we were doing, right? Just with… I dunno, more awareness.”

“Noooo, no.” Eddie shakes his head right back. “You said you didn’t want to pretend nothing ever happened, and you shouldn’t have to. I want to do this, Steve. Let me take you on a real date.”

Something unreadable flashes across Steve’s face, and suddenly his smile is wrong again. Sort of plastic – like he’s trying, but it’s not quite reaching his eyes. But before Eddie can ask what’s wrong, Steve is shrugging.

“If you insist…”

“I most certainly do,” Eddie says firmly. “I’m gonna romance the shit out of you.”

At that, Steve releases a helpless snort of laughter, and the plastic smile is gone, blown away by a real one.

“You’re making a super good argument for it,” Steve says, and Eddie grins.

“Aren’t I?” He bats his eyelashes. “So tell me: you free on Friday night?”

“I’m working, actually. Someone has to dole out dumb romances to other people out on dates,” Steve says drily, as if he himself hasn’t seen most of the films he’s maligning.

Eddie hums. “Saturday?”

“I could probably get someone to cover my shift,” Steve hedges, teasing and flirty and everything Eddie’s missed in the last few weeks.

“So you’ll be free?” Eddie asks.

“As a bird – as long as that bird isn’t a robin, considering who’s going to have to cover for me,” Steve says, and Eddie pulls a grimace.

“Yeah, maybe don’t tell her why you need the shift covered. I get the feeling she wouldn’t be as agreeable if she knew I was involved,” he says.

“I don’t think Robin’s ever been agreeable in her life, and she’d probably resent the accusation.” Steve smirks. “But as long as she doesn’t think I’m sneaking away to see you, and if I take the Monday morning shift she really hates, I don’t think it’ll be a problem. Let’s plan for Saturday?”

“Saturday it is!” Eddie pops up off the couch, both unwilling to sour the mood by overstaying his welcome, and suddenly overflowing with the need to set preparations in motion. “Six o’clock, sharp! I’ll pick you up.”

“Do I get to know where we’re going?” Steve asks, one eyebrow cocked.

“Absolutely not. The surprise is part of the experience,” Eddie says.

“Dress code, at least?” Steve wheedles, and Eddie supposes that’s fair.

“Casual. And bring a jacket,” Eddie says.

Both of Steve’s brows go up now, as he rises from the couch to follow Eddie back out towards the door. “Telling someone to bring outerwear to a date is usually a red flag, man,” he says, watching as Eddie shoves his shoes back on.

“But you love being outside,” Eddie counters, glancing up at Steve with a grin.

“I,” Steve pauses, blinking at him. “I guess.”

“And no more hints,” Eddie says, rising from the floor and reaching for the door handle. “I’ll see you on Saturday?”

“Yeah,” Steve says, his voice warming around a small, pleased smile, “I’ll see you on Saturday.”

“Can’t wait.” Eddie throws one last grin at him before stepping out into the brisk, late fall air.

He doesn’t stop smiling the whole way home.

Part 7

-

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The tag list is full at this time, but I'll be posting this fic to Ao3 soon, so hopefully people can subscribe there if they want update alerts?

[seethesin]

Shane x reader with choking or shame tying reader up? Only if you're ok writing that!!

pairing: Shane McCutcheon x F!Reader

tags/warnings: sexual content, established relationship, teasing, voyeurism/exhibitionism (kind of?), mirror sex, strap-on sex, clitoral stimulation, choking (18+, mdni)

a/n: choking for now, anon; i’ll cover bondage in a future fic 😉

“You look so precious like this.”

The sentence makes you shudder as you look at Shane in the mirror. Her face hovers just over your shoulder, leering at you like a starved animal. The both of you are situated at the foot of the bed, watching one another in the large wall mirror purchased for this exact purpose. You’re nestled in her lap, naked and with your legs parted slightly. The lewd display of your cunt swallowing her strap-on is enough to make your eyes roll into the back of your skull.

Shane pounding into your g-spot definitely helps hasten that.

Her pupils are blown out wide as her dominant hand is buried between your thighs, stroking controlled spirals into your clit. You feel her teeth press into the junction of your neck and you whine feebly. Chuckling, she runs the tip of her tongue across the newly forming bruise.

"You take my cock so well, sugar."

The two of you would try anything once. Mirror sex was on both of your bucket lists and it was so much hotter than you initially realized. Each time you and Shane shared a glance through the glass, your pussy drooled. The squelching was long forgotten as your nails dug into Shane's thighs, keeping yourself grounded. You pant, a groan bubbling from your chest as you begin to teeter in her lap.

"Words," she chides and you shake like a leaf. "What do you want, doll?"

At this moment, you couldn't even fathom the next sentence or sound that should come out of your mouth. The differing sensations were starting to get overwhelming and instead, you messily rutted off sync with Shane's thrusts.

She grunts, dissatisfied.

Suddenly, her opposite hand goes to your throat, fingers squeezing roughly your flesh. Your gasp comes out as a wheeze and your eyes go wide. The new pressure makes your clit throb and your thighs squeeze against Shane's wrist.

Oh.

Shane watches your reaction intently. A knowing smirk grows across her face at the way your eyes flutter and the tiny, contented smile that tugs at your lips. You reciprocate each other's gaze and Shane hums in the affirmative.

Thank god you didn't play poker.

Your face flushes as her fingers pinch tighter around your neck. Your breaths come out as labored huffs with each thrust of Shane's hips. She's slamming into you without abandon and with the wetness accumulating between your thighs, you can barely keep her pace. Instead, you roll your hips and move your grip from her thighs to her knees. Your orgasm was imminent.

"Gonna cum," you choke out, starting to lean forward as you let Shane continue to control the pace.

Immediately, she yanks you back upright by your neck, her chin planted onto your shoulder blade as she stares through you in the mirror. You whimper, pushing back into her thrusts.

"I want you to watch." Her demand knows no argument.

Dutifully, your eyes roam down your own body, watching the way your cunt sheathes the dildo. Sweat and slick cover your lower belly and drip down your thighs. The obscene display is too much and, with your eyes squeezed shut, your orgasm hits you like a truck. Shane's thrusts are shallow now, letting you hump her as you ride out the remnants of your climax.

Her fingers detach from your neck and you suck in a much-needed breath. Your eyes blink open and you are greeted by Shane's signature smirk.

"What is it?" Your breathlessness makes her laugh. Her palms slide to your hips, holding you close as she kisses up the slope of your neck.

"You closed your eyes at the end," she states simply, her hands crawling to your waist. The dildo is still buried in your cunt, stretching you deliciously.

You never wanted to leave this spot.

"I guess that means we'll have to go again."

The newfound confidence in your voice makes Shane's eyes sparkle, her smirk cracking into a genuine grin. One hand finds itself wrapped back around your neck, your chin caught between her index finger and thumb. She nudges your head up and keeps her grip steady so you're forced to look forward.

"I guess so."

[laviefantasie]

Video 2

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“… why are you turning that on?”

“Just because”

The camera starts recording both your bare and Satoru’s socked feet as you both lay in your bed together. The sunset light shining through your dorm’s window, brightening it all.

“You should be focusing!” Satoru whines.

“But i am!”

“Oh really?” He challenges, “What was i just saying now?”

“You were explaining to me why Kari and TK belong together, even when it isn’t canon” you roll your eyes.

“He is the crest of hope and she is the crest of light, you cannot tell me it wasn’t meant to be!” He exclaims.

“Didn’t their Digimons compliment each other?”

Satoru squeals, in a very girly non-muscular way, as he jumps to sit on the bed, making the camera move slightly before falling from your hands to the bed in the perfect position to record the exact moment Satoru jumps on top of you.

A groan leaves your body as Satoru’s weight ambushes you, his laughter doing nothing to lessen the pain.

“EXACTLY! YOU DO LISTEN TO ME!”

“Of course i do!” You groan, “Now… GET OFF!”

Satoru does, moving the video camera once again. It captures the exact moment Satoru sits beside you looking at you with a soft smile, even when you sit up with a frown, looking ready to scold him.

“You almost killed me”

“Oh, come on! Don’t exaggerate” he rolls his eyes.

“It felt like a tons of bricks fell on me!”

He gasps, “Are you calling me fat?!”

“Well, I’m just saying you don’t look what you weight!”

“TAKE THAT BACK!”

“NO!”

A pillow hits your face and an audible gasp leaves your lips as Satoru starts laughing hysterically.

“THAT’S IT”

You grab the pillow and start violently attacking Satoru, whose laughter stops abruptly and becomes girly squeals.

It doesn’t take long for him to get his hands on another pillow, soon both of you on a full on war as feathers start accumulating in your surroundings. Though neither of you mind it, too busy laughing out loud as you try and fail to shield yourselves from the hits.

It is only when Satoru hits you one last time, making you lose your footing, that you give up.

“I can’t… HAHAHA…. Bre-breathe…”

Satoru watches adoringly as you try to breathe properly, unable to do so because of your never ending laughter.

His heart thumps loudly in his chest and it makes him fear you may hear it. When had your laughter become his favorite sound? It was refreshing, peaceful… he was getting confused again.

“I WIN”

“NO” you scream, sitting up, “I was just on time out!”

“This is a war!” He smirks, “There are NO time outs! LOSER”

You groan as he starts his little victory dance, although you cannot hide the little smile on your face from the video camera still recording both of you.

Little smile that expresses a feeling you aren’t even aware of. A little smile that speaks volumes.

tag list: @gumiiiiezzzz

[thought--bubble]

It's ok to hurt me, I'm not worth much (one-shot)

Billy Washington X (Store Clerk Reader)

Warnings after the Break

Full Master list

Billy W. Master list

Banners By: @arcielee

A/N: this is by far the smuttiest thing I've ever written so please don't judge me too harshly 🤣🤣 I was inspired by the video someone posted of Billy whining and I couldn't help myself.🤣

Warnings: depression, self-loathing, oral sex (M receiving)

When you met Billy Washington, he seemed like a moderately happy guy. He must have had a flat nearby because he was in your cornerstore quite often. He would come alone, or sometimes he would be in the company of a pretty woman hands intertwined they seemed like a happy couple.

When he would come to the counter with his items for purchase, he would always have a friendly smile and ask how you have been doing. You loved it when he came into the store. Mostly because you could stare at him when he did. He was handsome. He had a tall, slender figure. A sharp jawline with piercing blue eyes and shaggy hair.

You didn't flirt with him because you were aware he had a girlfriend. A girlfriend who you surmised was one of the luckiest women you had ever met. She was as beautiful as he was. Light features and a soft laugh.

You always looked forward to his visits, though. You paid such close attention that you picked up on subtle changes. It started with the pretty girl. You noticed that for weeks on end, she had not accompanied him. Then, it was his smile. It seemed each time you saw him that beautiful smile of his got smaller and smaller until there was no smile at all. Then the fluffy hair on his head hung down in what looked like oily globs. His previously clean shaven face now littered with patches of mismatched hairs that looked like a young boy trying to grow a beard for the first time.

You couldn't help but wonder, what had happened to this cheeky adorable man?

You were getting ready to close down the shop. It was a Friday night and you planned on going to the pub with a few friends to unwind. You were counting the till when the little bell over the door interrupted your thoughts. You had thought you locked the door.

"I'm sorry were closing up" you said not looking up.

"Possible just to get a quick pack o smokes?"

You lift your head quickly at the recognition of his voice. Although it no longer sounded cheeky instead shakey and unsure you would still recognize it anywhere.

"Oh, sure. Can't deny you now can I?" You joke while grabbing his brand of smokes from behind the counter and placing them in front of you.

He looks an utter mess. Eyes glossy, hair disheveled, clothes unkempt.

He gives you a half smile that doesn't make it to his eyes. You put your hand over the pack and bite your bottom lip.

"I'll give you these.... IF you answer some questions" You feel a small burst of adrenaline you have never been this forward.

He looks at you confused "questions?" He scratches at his temple. You notice his hand is injured and wrapped in gauze.

"Yep. We have a deal?" You pick up the pack and wiggle it back and fourth in front of him.

"Yeah, alright, I'm not too interesting though"

"I'll be the judge of that." You move from behind the counter and flip the open sign to closed and lock the door. You pull down the blinds over the windows and the last one over the door.

"No interruptions." You go back behind the counter and pull out two stools, bringing them to where Billy is standing. He is shifting his weight from foot to foot. Running the flat of his palms down the front of his pants, no doubt, trying to wipe off the sweat that has started to accumulate there.

You move the two stools so they are facing each other.

"Sit" you motion to one of the stools.

He hesitates, looking between you and the stools with confusion.

"You're fidgety, sit"

He lets out a shakey light laugh and sits down on the stool and you sit down on the stool you had set up across from him.

"Ok.... first question" you look into his eyes he looks so nervous. It endearing.

"What happened to the pretty girl that was always in here with you?"

"Becky.... oh yeah that..... didn't work out" he looks down at his feet nervously tapping them together.

You fight the smirk that wants to crawl across your face. "Is that the reason for all of this?" You wave your hands towards him.

"All of what?" He looks at you confused.

"The dirty hair? Unkempt clothes? No longer shaving?"

"W-what? N-no. " he pats down his hair and brushes off his clothes self-consciously. "I've got a lot of different things going on at the moment"

"Explain it to me" you say gently.

He looks away, not wanting to make eye contact. "You don't want to hear any of this." he nervously runs his fingers through his hair.

"But I do" you scoot your stool forward so your knees are near touching as you reach down and squeeze his with your hand. "Tell me"

His eyes go wide as he stares at your hand on his knee and clears his throat. "U-umm... got rejected from the army"

"That's not a big deal loads of people do" you run your hand up his thigh and back down to his knee in a comforting gesture.

He keeps his head down watching your hand "no not my family. Not just once but a lot of times."

"So..... choose a different career path, " you say now using your thumb to rub circles on his knee.

"Can't keep a job." He lets out a huff mixed with a laugh

"Then you haven't found the right one"

He finally lifts his head and looks at you. "Why are you doing this?"

"Because that happy funny man I always loved to see has disappeared. I would like to find him and bring him back. " You get off the stool and stand in front of him.

"Trust me, I'm not worth it," he says, dejected.

"Hey," you put your hands on his cheeks and lift his face to look at you. His blue eyes are so sad that you feel yourself melt a little. You rub your thumbs along his cheekbones. "What has you saying a terrible thing like that?"

He allows you to keep his head in your hands and keeps looking up at you. "They all tell me. They ain't wrong."

You think he looks like a little puppy that needs to be rescued in this moment. "They hurt you, huh?" You continued caressing his cheekbones. He raises his arms as if he is going to rest them on your hips but instead lets them fall back into his lap.

"It's ok to hurt me, I'm not worth much," your heart breaks as he finally looks away from you, putting his hands over yours and lowering them off of his face.

You kneel down in front of him and place your hands on his knees. He looks at you completely confused.

"Umm.... ermmm.... what are you doing?" He runs the palms of his hands against his pants.

"I want to show you that you are important." He stays silent, eyes wide just staring at you.

You run your hands from his knees up his thighs and back down while you both maintain eye contact.

"H-how would you do that?" He gulps loudly.

"I have a few ideas." You scoot in closer, spreading his legs apart, settling yourself in between them.

"What makes you feel good" you say to him in your best sultry voice.

He's just looking at you, jaw slack. After a few minutes, he finally half responds. "Huh?"

"Well, you have been feeling bad. So -" You run both hands from his knees all the way up to his hips, lingering for a moment before running them back down."I would like to know what makes you feel good"

He makes a small whimpering sound as his eyes quickly scan your face. "If you won't tell me, I guess I will just have to figure it out. If what I'm doing makes you feel bad, you just tell me, yeah?"

He barely squeaks out an "Uh hu"

You run your hands up and down his thighs a few more times and click your tongue. "Tsk tsk so tense, Billy."

He makes another small whimpering noise lighting a fire in your belly. You bring your hands back up to his hips and then slide them under his shirt.

He holds his breath but doesn't pull away. Your hands slowly slide out of his shirt and over his waistband and down into his lap.

When your hands brush lightly over his manhood under his joggers, he lets out a slightly louder whine and his hips jolt forward. You start to caress him through his joggers as he is involuntarily bucking his hips lightly.

"So responsive, sweet boy," he whimpers again as you bring your hands back up to his waistband and start to shimmy them down just enough to free his throbbing member.

"Well, that's impressive" you say while looking and his fully erect cock thats already wet with precum.

Billy is breathing heavily but doesn't say anything he stares at your hand as you wrap it around him.

"Oh shit" he says in a whimper as you start moving your hand up and down in precise motions along his cock not fully gripping.

"It's so pretty" you say and fully grip him as he lets out a gasp. His hands gripping the sides of the stool.

You lean in as if you're inspecting it, making sure your breath can be felt on the tip.

Billy whimpers again, his hips slightly shifting. You give the tip a kitten lick and then look up at billy. His eyes are wide and his mouth open completely entranced.

You take his right hand and place it on the back of your neck before leaning completely forward and taking the head of his cock in your mouth. You feel the hand on your neck start to squeeze, and you hear him starting to pant above you.

You take as much into your mouth as you can and grip the rest with your hand as you start bobbing your head up and down, hollowing your cheeks. Billy slides his hand up from your neck into your hair.

"P-p-please don't stop," he says in between whimpers. You start to move your head more vigorously. Feeling his cock battering the back of your throat. His whimpering is getting steadily louder, and his hips start to buck up off the stool. His hand gripping your hair as if he is hanging on for dear life.

You lower your head as far down as you can until it causes you to gag. Billy moves to pull your hair back with both his hands, watching your every move intently.

"Oh, I'm gonna, oh no, I'm gonna." He doesn't finish his sentence before you feel his cock pulse I'm your mouth as his seed shoots down your throat.

You make sure to swallow everything he gives you and then rise to your feet. He sits on the stool face flushed with beads of sweat on his forehead.

"I bet you really need that pack a smokes now, huh?" You say cheekily as you walk back around to the back of the counter.

Billy is still speechless sitting on the stool, and he hasn't moved an inch yet. Only his eyes are following you around the room.

You go back over to him, sitting in the stool and handing the pack of cigarettes to him. He stares at the pack blankly, not moving.

You giggle, taking his hand and placing the cigarettes in them. This contact seems to wake him up, and he looks at you.

"T-thank you"

You smile sweetly at him. "I have to finish closing this place up now.

"Oh yeah, sure i should....." he looks down and gets himself back into his joggers.

"I should probably get out of your way then," he stands up. He looks over at you like he wants to say something else but can't bring himself to do so. He walks to the door and opens it to step out.

"Billy?" He stops and looks at you.

"I expect to see that happy smiling man back in here. I have a surprise. I can't wait to give him"

Billy dawns a giant cheeky grin that lights up his face.

"I think he will be coming to this store often"

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[blackfangedreaper]

PHOTOGENIC

Prompt: "Beach alliance party"

Pairing: Luffy x black!fem!info!Reader

Warnings: sexual content; dry humping, sex on the beach (literally) curse words, display of public affection (noone noticed though) and grammatical errors. Mdni.

Tag list: @closet-degenerate @luffyinlove @euphoficc @444katsuki @audreys-works @boa--hancock

The waves crashed onto the shore in a soft manner wetting the dry sand before going back once again. The clear skies and bright sun reflecting off the ocean to give it a bright blue tint. The strawhats-cough luffy cough- decided take a little break before sailing to the next destination; much to law's distain. He actually expected you to scold luffy but when he met your eyes you looked just as excited as luffy so he erased the idea off his mind.

After getting to the shore safely the strawhats and heart pirates bounded up on the beach donning they're swimsuits. Nami and robin decided a little sunbathing wouldn't hurt, sanji ran helping them in any way he could before setting up a cooking station for them but it all flew out of the window when luffy and co. rushed by, collecting everything deemed eatable as they ran past the stand. "CURSE YOU HEATHENS!" He fell to his knees crying as he apologised to nami and robin for being so careless.

Law seemed to be in the far side of the beach doing who knows what, he didn't seem to be alone though. Hmm? What about you? Well you found a shaded area to lay your beach chair. Luffy saw you and ran up to you, his face messy from earlier on. "Oh luffy! Your all messy." You scolded cleaning his face then him pushing him unto the beach chair and telling him to wait. "Don't move ok? I'll be right back!"

He whined watching you run towards and into sunny. "Oi luffy!! What are you doing? Come take a look at this!" He turned his attention toward ussop, penguin and a wheezing shachi, they were all holding their laugh as they patted down the mermaid tail they constructed on the sand. And if you shifted your eyes to the upper half you'd notice a sleeping zoro. Completely unaware that he was being casted as the little mermaid in this story.

"HAHAHA!!! Just what is that?!!" Luffy laughed falling off the chair and holding his stomach as he rolled around on the soft beach sand. "I know right!! Now come over here!! If we keep shouting he'll wake up!" Ussop said panicking. "Sorry i can't! Y/n said to stay put!" Luffy sulked turning to look at the ship and thankfully he saw you coming and boy was he stunned.

You had a on a red bra-top that flattered your breasts a whole lot, matching with some red bikini bottoms that accumulated your curves a little too well, this made your ass look round and plump- in short you were sexy as fuck. You had a light blue scarf wrapped around your waist flowing down to your thighs and brushing your calfs a bit. Your braids were taken out of its bun and fell down your back in a graceful manner, swaying with every step you took. "I'm sorry baby, did i take too long?"

"N-No- wait a minute, Yes!" Dazed for a second luffy snapped out of it and pointed towards your direction accusingly, his lips jutting out in a pout. "But honey, i only took two minutes. I was looking for the sunscreen, don't want you to get sun burnt like last time." You explained furrowing your eyebrows at his stutter in the beginning.

"Come on, I'll rub it on you." You insisted starting with his back first, you took off the scarf covering you and when you did luffy averted his eyes cause if he saw you, he would do unspeakable things to you right that instant and with no shame at all but whose to say he wouldn't do it later. You sat behind him and begun to apply the sunscreen. When you were done you stood up and walked to his front, he watched your hips sway as you walked past him, your hair brushing your butt as you did so.

You knelt down between his legs using your right hand to push him down the chair before straddling him properly. Your thighs side to side with his abdomen and your bum sitting comfortably on his thighs, that was until you felt his hands slither up your thighs to grasp your waist, pulling you forward so your ass could take rest on his crotch. You mewled feeling his light bulge, looking him straight in the eye you scolded him. "Not here luffy!"

"Awww why not?!" He pouted looking up at you with his puppy dog eyes, ugh you couldn't say no when he did that so you removed the black shades you kept on your head and placed it on luffy, shielding his eyes from your sight. "There, all better." You snickered feeling him tighten his hold on you. He's fingers digging into the fat of your thighs in frustration. He tried bucking up a little but you pressed your hands on his chest stopping him completely. "...Fine." He gave up sighing but his hands still remained on your thighs, closer to your bum this time.

"Good boy." You beamed sitting up straight, pouring the sunblocker solution into your hands and rubbing it on his body. Your body was slightly tilted forward as you worked up and down his chest without haste, making sure to leave no spot untouched. On the other hand it wasn't helping luffy's case as he watched your breasts bounce with every action you made. Fuck he would have thought you were out to tease him if not for the concentrated look on your face but he highly doubts that cause he was sure you could feel the tent growing in his swim shorts.

He was about to slip his hands into your panties to grasp your nyash ass raw but he was interrupted by ussop hollering at both you and him. "Oi! Y/n! Luffy! When your done let's have a sand castle competition! Not like you'd get 1st place that's my spot." Ussop said laughing smugly. "But it seems I'll cut you guys some slack, as a professional i can't be bothered with criticising your amateur sand castle." He puffed his chest not noticing his nose grew a little longer at his lie and false confidence.

"Yeah right!" You laughed not noticing luffy taking his left hand and returning it back briefly. Ussop turned to you startled. "Damn it! she figured me out!" He scampered away leaving a wheezing you. You turned your attention to luffy once again, looking back at him you were startled to see him looking right at you, Your sunglasses no longer covering his eyes but now rested on top his ebony locks. Now the shades were off you could see something glinting in his eyes and you felt like you knew what it was.

"Luffy?" You said tilting your head in question, your braids following your movements. Why was he looking at you like that, you weren't complaining but does he know what he's doing to you? "Why are you looking at me like that?"

His dark brown eyes where almost shielded by his lowered lids, his eyebrows at rest and his lips set in a straight and thin line. He eyed you up and down drinking your appearance for the nth time that day and damn... You seemed to look better with each and every glimpse.

"Stop that, it's turning me on." You leaned in almost hypnotised by his gaze. Didn't he know his burning gaze set every cell in your body alight. He must have known he had such an effect, if not he wouldn't be looking at you like that, like he was utterly in love and infatuated with you, like he wanted to do sinful things to you, like he wanted ravage you.

"Hmm, is it?" His voice taking a deeper turn than its usual light tone. His eyes switching between your beautiful (e/c) eyes and plump lips just begging to be kissed. Your hands trailed up and down his toned sun-kissed body before once again taking refuge on his chest as you leaned in closer to kiss him.

"Yeah..." You whispered, your eyes never leaving his. You were so close he could feel your breath lightly brushing against his lips. Your braids shielded you both from the outside world and just when the world seemed quieter your lips met, kissing with raw passion and lust, moaning at each others taste. Your tongues were intertwined and you didn't bother fighting for dominance, you knew luffy would always win.

"Mmph!" You whimpered into the kiss, feeling a smack land on your rear as he intensely made out with you. You felt so soft being pressed up against him, your palm flat against his chest and he could faintly feel your boobs through the space your parted hands left. Your back arched and butt slightly up allowing you to be comfortable and luffy to gain quick access to your behind.

Luffy cupped your ass and squeezed, gaining handfuls of your plump soft flesh as they spilled through the spaces of his fingers due to how much of a tight grip he had on you then processed to knead you cheeks together, packing as much fat as he could before squeezing and caressing to his desire. He spread his fingers wide, palming your ass then bringing you down to grind on him.

He bucked his hips, his clothed crotch rubbing against yours slowly and softly. You whimpered feeling your self get wet- dammit it hadn't been an hour yet but here was your bikini; soiled. Taking one hand off your bum he kneaded your breast, rolling the nipple that had made it's self know through your bra top. "Nngh!"

"Hmm..." You both broke apart and so did the thin string connecting your lips. You looked around to see if the coast was clear before you trailed your hands down to his shorts to pull his hard shaft out. Luffy's mouth part slightly to let out little whimpers from the pleasure he got from your strokes "ugh... Inside, i wanna go inside."

"Hmm? Now that's just rude honey, what the magic word?" You pouted rubbing circles round his pre-cum soaked head. "Nng! Please, please let me in y/n!" He begged pursing his lips at you. "Ok!" You beamed complying with his wishes. You sat on your knees shifting your soaked panties to the side as you rubbed his head up then down your slit before pushing his head past your clenching hole. "Oh!"

"So warm!" Luffy moaned at the feeling of your tight and wet insides while you threw your head back whimpering at his size, he wasn't even halfway in and you were already struggling. You swirled your middle and ring finger round your pearl in hopes to get you more wet as you continued to sink down on his cock. Too bad luffy didn't have that type of patience, he grabbed your waist. "What? Luffy! No-" and slammed you down, hard. "Hnngh- luffy!"

You froze, one hand on your clit and the other squeezing luffy's hand on your waist in shock. Your walls clenched at the sheer size of him almost bringing him a quick orgasm. He waited for you to adjust before grabbing your ass in a tight grip, pulling and pushing to make you grind down on him. "Y-Yes just like that y/n!"

His eyes halflidded, almost rolling back in pleasure when you started to bounce up and down on him. The cool shade the tree provided covered you both from prying eyes, the crashing waves doing the same to your moans and wails. You used his chest to stabilise yourself, your palm flat against his pecs as you rose up then down to grind against him, you repeated these steps careful not to go too high as to not separate from him.

The beach chair creaked at both your weights but still stayed stable taking both your masses like a boss. Your control was soon overtaken by luffy as he wrapped his digits round your thigh to lift you up a little, his veins and muscles becoming visible. Lifting you till his tip was almost out of you before slamming you back on him, thrusting upwards to meet you in the air.

"Oh Fuck! Luffy!" You wailed at his force. He laughed at your pleasure filled face, pistoning in and out of you like a hydraulic press. Pushing in and out of you at his desired pace loving how your head rolled back and how your throat forced a groan. "Faster baby! Please!" Running your palm up from the curve of your ass trailing to the dips of your waist and then the undercut of your bra top to grasp your breast, you massaged your boob before squeezing your nipple between your index and middle finger. "Oh!"

Luffy landed a smack on your ass before following your hand, trailing after the spots your hands traced on your body, rubbing your hand before slapping them off your breast. He lifted your bra-top up to tug and squeeze at your breast and nipples, watching them bounce to the rhythm of his thrusts. "Look how pretty they are."

He beckoned you closer, you obliged leaning down to captured his lips with yours before he trailed it down your jaw. He littered your skin with kisses and harsh sucks. You whimpered at the feeling before doing the same to the under side of his jaw. He groaned at the feeling of your hot tongue marking his skin.

Rubbing your butt he rocked you back and forth slowly on his dick as one of his hand found its way to your neck, pulling on your braids lightly to press his lips against yours. As your tongues chased after each other he began to move you faster chasing both your highs. His tongue leaving your mouth to trace your lips slowly, looking in your eyes as he scratched a particular itch in you. He landed a harsh slap on your butt watching you shudder and release a shallow breath. Your eyes rolled back in your skull due to your abrupt orgasm.

"Ouhh- fuckkk!" You whimpered your brows furrowing at the powerful orgasm that shook your body. Your pussy clenching tightly at its intensity and the still thrusting luffy. "L-Luffy! Wai- oh my!" Relentless he pounded into you his control snapping at how tight and wet you felt. You then bit his earlobe dragging it slightly before grazing the thin skin behind it with your teeth. Suddenly you felt him shiver, his grip on your ass tightening as he rocked you forward one last time before pumping his heavy load into you, his balls straining against his shorts as it emptied itself.

"Oh fuck!" He growled, panting in exhaustion and at the strain of his release. Feeling him pat your bum you took it as sign to sit up. You raised your hips letting luffy slide out of you and unto his belly, you sighed in relief before you jolted, feeling luffy palm your womanhood. You looked at him in question before you felt it, his cum sliding down your walls looking for the escape route due to how full you were.

Before you know it luffy shoves his middle and ring finger up your slot, spreading his essense on your walls massaging them in deeper. You gasped feeling his fingers come out to coat your slit in his cum before shoving them back in. After spreading his essence within you he pulled out, his fingers dripping with both his and your cum. You stuck your tongue out welcoming the taste of both his and your mixture on your tongue. You hummed licking his fingers clean the releasing them with a 'pop'.

You sat up straight on him, tucking his dick back into his shorts and fixing yourself. A smile formed on your lips as you brought out your camera. "That was fun! Wanna take a picture?" You laughed the sexual tension dissipating in the air as you said that.

"Hell yeah! Is it one of your post card thingies?" He tilted his head in question. You nodded thinking of what pose you could do. Then suddenly. "Ahah!". You lifted the camera up leaning forward with your back arched. Your right hand laid flat against luffy's abs, your braids framing your face as your lips took on a teasing smile. You took the picture and brought the camera to see the result and it was pretty good.

It showed you in your full glory; your red bikini set brought out your brown skin, little sun beams breaking through the tree shade highlighted you making your skin look a beautiful golden brown, the hickey on your neck showing clearly. Your butt your pushed out, bringing your curves out more, your thighs fitting snuggly against luffy's side with your palm laid flat upon his built abdomen.

To be honest you knew people would be more interested on who you were straddling. The picture only showed his delicious abs and you made sure not to get his scar in the picture, only from his abdominal region down to the hem of his red swimming shorts, so it was all good, it'll keep the fishes wanting more and that's exactly what you were going for.

"Haha! What's with the sinister smile." Luffy laughed sitting up to take a look at the picture before smiling in satisfaction before looking up to address you. "You look beautiful."

Your face heated up beaming as you squealed, glomping him, your soft mounds pressing against him and putting him in a bashful state. "Your so cute i could die!"

"Haha! Your so weird y/n, don't go dying on me though!" You pulled away looking at sweatdropping before commenting dryly."Funny coming from you."

"Shishishi! I don't know what your talking about! Come on let's go change then pester tra-guy to build a sand castle with us! He's such a grump." Luffy said wrapping your legs around his waist, carrying you by your ass then standing up abruptly causing you to bounce a little. He then took off to sunny with you in toll quite excited to disturb an unsuspecting law who was already dealing with his own... problems.

[justimajin]

The Profit & Love Statement » Pt. 6

↠ Pairing: Seokjin x Reader

↠ Genre: Fluff, Comedy, Angst

↳ (4.4k), Office AU (lowkey E2L vibes) 

↠ Summary: The workplace isn’t for everyone. It can be mundane and repetitive, with some describing it like a nuisance and others as a blessing. You’re the kind that leans more towards the latter and while it does make you an ideal candidate for many things, nothing could have prepared you for the whirlwind that is the new employee.

GIF credit.

↠ Next Update: Tuesday, August 22 (series masterpost here)

“One spinach dip appetizer and two mushroom soups.” 

Your brows draw together as you carefully scribble down the order. Pursing your lips, you lean forward and press a hand against your ear. 

“Do you mind just repeating that last part?” You raise your voice a couple of tones over the blasting music and loud chatter of customers around you. 

“One spinach dip appetizer and two mushroom soups.” The man repeats, despite you just not hearing only the end of his sentence. 

You hum, focusing on swirling your pen against the paper quickly even though there’s a customer across the room sitting with an empty plate and glancing around anxiously for a waitress. 

You look up, ready to ask the two men if there were any desert or drinks they wanted as well, only for the words never leaving you. 

“Look over it again sweetie, just in case your memory fails you.” 

You raise an eyebrow and meet with an annoyed expression on his face. There’s an endless list of sarcastic remarks and comments ready to escape you, but with a polite smile, you simply say‒

“I appreciate the advice, but I’d rather get down any deserts and drinks you’d want.” 

Even though his expression doesn’t change, he at least gives you the rest of the order properly. You promptly leave the table and hand the order in, swiftly moving on to wait for the table of seven the previous man was at. 

“The bill!” He blurts out right away and you take the cue to head over to cash to print out the bill, only for him to pause you. 

“We want to split it!” 

“How many?” You ask, assuming they were all friends and just wanted to pay separately in two bills. 

“Seven!” He announces and you blink. 

He wants to split the bill….seven ways? 

You politely nod with a smile, but there’s no mistaking the confused and annoyed expression you hold at cash.

Spending roughly fifteen minutes printing different receipts, you force yourself to ignore the pending stares waiting for their orders and head back, seven bills in your hand. 

But the real fun comes when there’s seven different people asking you to bring them a machine for their credit cards. 

Twenty excruciating minutes later, you are pacing around the restaurant and bringing orders back and forth. Sweat begins to accumulate at your temples and when there’s a customer loudly complaining that there’s a piece of hair in his soup, you nearly lose it. 

The door to the bathroom slams open and you slip in with a quick ‘bathroom break’. 

Your back falls against the tiled walls and you wipe away the sweat, a breath of relief leaves you. 

You stay like that for probably fifteen minutes, a stark difference arising in your demeanor. 

It’s only when there’s a soft knock against that you’re scrambling forward, fixing your apron. Planting a hand against the bathroom door, you’re expecting to see your Manager furious with your unplanned break, or worse a customer whining you haven’t gotten their order yet. 

As horrifying and unrealistic as that last scenario is, neither of them thankfully come true.

Jungkook grins as you emerge outside. To your disbelief, the entire store is empty. 

“Good news,” He says, “Boss had to rush home early today for his wife’s birthday so the restaurant closed early. New customers were turned away and old ones left after eating and paying.” 

“You’re joking.” You exhale, unconsciously pressing a hand against your racing heart. 

“Nope.” He picks up a mop and some rags, “We’ve got cleaning duty today too, so if you’re okay with spending the next hour scrubbing tables and floors with me, it might just be your lucky day.” 

A huge smile curls at the corner of your lips and you gladly take the mop away from him. 

***

The laughter practically spills from his lips. 

“So you’re telling me….” He points out in the midst of it, “He took the first opportunity to run away when you weren’t looking?”

Your chin is resting on top of the mop handle you were using, an annoyed look crossing your features compared to the giant bunny smile Jungkook adorns.

“Yep.”

“Wow.” Jungkook remarks, “What an interesting place I applied to.”

You lower your hands and grasp onto the mop handle again with a huff, “Don’t even! I had so much work to catch up on afterwards and it could have all been avoided if I hadn’t spent all my time trying to chase after him.”

“Like what I am doing wrong?” You wonder, “Forcing him to work?”

“They do say that some people aren’t naturally suited to certain professions.” Jungkook brings up, spraying down a table.

You snort, “And where’d you find that saying?”

“I discovered it when a customer’s kid threw up the other day and while cleaning it up, I realized–“ He pauses, “Man, I really can’t do this.”

You grimace, “That bad?”

“The kid threw up a second time during the night and it was all over the entrée.” He shakes his head, “Let’s just say taking two showers wasn’t even enough.”

“I don’t know who to feel worse for – you or the kid.”

“Honestly after seeing his mom scold him for ruining dinner, I would say the kid.”

You softly smile at that and Jungkook sighs, sounding like his patience was wearing thin, “I’m just hoping for any type of job response now. Good or bad.”

“Well, here’s to hoping for the best.”

You raise your mop with a smile and Jungkook laughs at the display. 

“Thanks.” He mutters, peering over at you, “Also, not to sound rude or anything, but I think I’ve been seeing way too much of you these days.” 

He pauses, “Did you take on more shifts?” 

You nod, “My landlord decided to generously hike up my rent recently.” A bitter laugh leaves you, “So either I take more shifts or find a new place to live at.” 

“Damn, that sucks.” Jungkook replies, “Just make sure you're not overdoing it though. Money or not, being around customers 24/7 isn’t the best.” 

“Why?” You quirk up an eyebrow, “You have a problem with customers?” 

Jungkook chuckles, “This is coming from the person that ducked into the bathroom to avoid them.” 

You laugh, well aware how strict your boss was at taking no breaks during dinner time rush hour, “You talk like you haven’t done the same.” 

“Hey, I took two showers. Two showers.” Jungkook emphasizes, “I think I’ve sacrificed enough.” 

Laugher spills out of your lips and Jungkook exhales like he’s seen too much. 

On the flip side, the office has been bustling.

In the midst of discussions circulating through the office of a new model being launched, you’ve been busier than usual. Not only do you have the stress of getting a bunch of new tasks done in evaluating and setting current sales goals, you’ve also been informed that the departments are expected to present information to their superiors for the new product launch.

As a result, your own work area is a disarray and you can’t remember the last break you took.

“Y/N, did you finish the customized report?” You hear Yoongi’s voice echo through the plastic.

“Not yet.” You deeply exhale, “I’m aiming to get it hopefully done by today.”

Yoongi hums on the other side and you could have sworn that if you looked over a little, the man’s work area would be in a similar disarray as you alongside with some empty cups of coffee. You haven’t spoken to Seokjin for much of the day, informed that he was to be in a meeting with your Manager.

Typing a few more inputs into your screen while stifling down a low yawn, you get up from your chair and head towards the printing room.

There’s many tasks you haven’t run through yet – with the most notable being running down to Marketing and Customer Service. You usually consult those two departments during this time and let them in on the impending budget, as well as assisting wherever you can.

You also typically go through the current sales goals and evaluate if they’re exactly what your company is aiming for this time around. You know the goals should be lower than before, since the company has already lost a lot of revenue from the previous product and don’t have sustainable–

There’s a shoulder that collides right into your forehead, sending you falling backwards.

The file in your hands splatters onto the ground.

“Oh my god–“ You instantly crouch down, attempting to quickly collect the contents and stack them together. “I am so sorry, Sir.”

You glance up meekly only to see Hoseok having the widest grin on his face. 

“Hoseok?”

“No, please.” He places an exaggerated hand on his chest with a grin, “You may call me ‘Sir’ from now on.”

You shake your head with a scoff, and he leans over, helping you stuff the remaining papers in your file. Rising onto your feet, Hoseok smiles.

“So I’m assuming the new product launch hasn’t spared you either?”

“Barely.” You remark, “Also sorry about that.”

“Eh, don’t worry about it too much. I think it’s because everyone’s been working extra hard lately.” He retorts, “I said hi to Yoongi today and even he seemed out of it.”

You knowingly smile and Hoseok points to your file, “Speaking of which, you really seem in desperate need for a break.”

“Oh no, I’m good.”

“You sure?” Hoseok raises a brow, your fatigued shoulders and drooped shoulders being far too much of an obvious sign. “Have you even had a break for lunch yet?” 

Before you can say anything, it seems like your stomach making noises is enough of a response.

Hoseok tries his best to hold down his laughter and you shake your head with an embarrassed smile, already gesturing to him to head towards the break room.

***

“You have meetings lined up too?”

Hoseok leans against the counter as you remain seated at one of the tables. The coffee machine behind him blends and churns, puffs of steam emitting from the top.

“Yep.” You grimace at the taste of uncooked noodles entering your mouth, “I think I saw an email of a short one scheduled this week.”

“I got that one too, my lead said it was going to just be an overview of the product launch for all departments.” Hoseok explains. 

“Imagine my relief.” You sarcastically retort and Hoseok snickers. 

“From a failure of a project launch to the next~” Hoseok wistfully says, turning around to grab his coffee. Despite his playful tone, there’s a dash of seriousness in his eyes.

“Can I ask you something?”

You hum, “Why did you take up the responsibility to train Seokjin? It seems like you already have a lot on your plate.”

Your hand freezes.

Normally, you wouldn’t want to discuss such matters with your coworkers and it’s information you would want to keep under wraps.

But this is Hoseok asking you.

Your voice drops into a whisper, “The good news came from Soyou saying she would monitor my work in the next couple of weeks and then hinted at higher opportunities.”

“Woah, really?” He says in astonishment, slipping into the chair in front of you, “That’s amazing, Y/N!”

You softly smile, “That, plus I could really use the raise in pay.” A sigh leaves you, “Aside from taking more shifts at my other workplace and this job, I don’t really have any other options to bring in income.” 

Hoseok attentively nods, “In a situation like this, the only two other options are taking on a third job or applying for a loan, but I’m not sure how you would feel about those.” 

“Both are ideas I did have.” You admit, “But both have other problems that I don’t know if I can deal with.”

Although doable, a third job would be far too hectic for you to balance. Alongside that, you weren’t keen on the various interest rates you would have to keep paying just in taking the loan. 

Hoseok hums, “Well, I’m glad Soyou’s giving you a chance, Y/N.” He looks at you intently, expression deadpanning. “But promise me you won’t push yourself too much and that you’ll take good care of yourself, okay?” 

You chuckle, “I will Hoseok, I promise.” 

He smiles and you quirk a brow at him. 

“Enough of my woes, how are yours doing?”

He pouts and leans forward on his hand, “You know, the usual – my mom’s still trying to set me up with someone and running away in protest doesn’t seem to be the answer.”

“Aw, you pulled a Seokjin.” You remark with a smile.

Hoseok chuckles, “Wow, the salt is still there, I see.” He spreads his arms wide, “Fortunately, the good old woes of Hobi are still going on and would definitely cheer you up.”

You laugh at that as Hoseok grins. “Remind me to visit your mom one time and try to convince her otherwise.”

“Will do.” He leans forward, “Speaking of visits….”

You blink, “What?”

Hoseok raises an intrigued brow, but you’re still confused by the implication. Suddenly, a light bulb goes off in your head.

“Oh, that visit.” You smirk, “Jungkook said the last time he came, you launched yourself on him.”

“Of course I did!” Hoseok loudly protests, “I haven’t seen the guy in centuries so of course the one time I see him, I’m going to hug him!”

Your shoulders are shaking with laughter and Hoseok pouts, “Come on, convince him please.”

“Well, word on the street is that he applied for a job here and is waiting for an interview.” You whisper, wishing you had a camera to capture the utter joy on Hoseok’s face.

“Yes! It’ll be like good ol’ times!” Hoseok reminisces, “Except Yoongi’s gotten a lot grumpier since he had his kids, Jungkook’s a lot older, and we’re no longer at an internship.”

“You forgot the part where we got older too.”

“Shh, we don’t talk about that.” Hoseok waves you off and continues rambling, something that just has your head shaking with a smile.

There’s a deep frown settled on his lips.

The door is closed shut behind him as he exits the room, the annoyance on his features clear as daylight. He wasn’t expecting much – perhaps a simple check in on his training or more so, to inform him that making a run for it during work hours wasn’t exactly very professional of him. In any sense, he assumed that he would be planted in front of Mrs. Soyou Kang.

But nothing could have prepared him for this meeting.

“You’re joking.” He says baffled, “You have to be joking.” 

“I thought you knew, Mr. Kim.” The finance manager had said to him, “We’ve mandated that you would be trained here as an employee…but ultimately, for a future position in the company.”

Seokjin’s eyes are as wide as they can possibly be.

“But that doesn’t mean I can become the CEO in just two month’s!” 

“Headlines have started to come out.” Mrs. Kang had said, “In two month’s time, your father will be officially retired and wants you to take up the position.” 

There’s a mixture of thoughts and feelings racing through his head, all of which he can barely comprehend. He knew all of this was eventually coming, but for it to be a mere matter of months?

How on earth is he going to manage an entire company by then? 

She had simply given him a soft smile, and he knows that there’s no use in saying anything to rebuttal.

He is the CEO’s son after all – the very one chosen to uphold the title. Of course it would soon be time for him to follow in the same steps.

A deep sigh leaves him outside the manager’s office.

“Well, this just all sucks.” He mutters harshly underneath his breath. Glancing around, he realizes he hasn’t seen you all day and it further drills into him the reality of what all this training has been leading up to.

He’s confined again, and for some reason the elevator at the end of the hall is all he can stare at. 

The elevator takes forever to come to a stop.

Your heel taps against the floor as your arms remain crossed. Hoseok is leaning against the door, patiently waiting with a sheepish smile.

“You’d think getting back up to the next floor would take less than five minutes.”

“More like twenty.” You say with a small laugh, scanning the structure, “Maybe there’s just a lot of people using it?”

Before Hoseok can answer, the elevator dings and your eyes light up. Hoseok practically scrambles away from his subdued posture, finally ecstatic to head down to his floor.

The elevator opens. You glance up unfazed.

“Seokjin?”

“Y/N!” He laughs in an instant – a little too quickly, you note, “What a surprise! How funny is it that we bumped into each other, right?”

He continues to laugh, “Well, nice seeing you around!”

Although petrified, he still attempts to make a run for it, but it’s not until your voice compels him does he stop.

“Wait.” You turn and Hoseok glances at both of you in confusion, “Aren’t you supposed to be on the Sales and Finance floor?”

He’s rendered speechless, no excuse coming to mind.

At his realization, your voice mimics his own cherry tone, “What a coincidence, we’re going the same way too.”

Hoseok slips into the elevator and you follow after him, “Are you coming…?”

Seokjin lets out the biggest sigh ever. He was so close, literally just one floor away, but of course he had to manage to bump into you somehow.

With a deflated sour look and slumped shoulders, he follows through and enters the elevator.

***

Throughout the elevator ride, there’s this odd silence that doesn’t go away. It’s not until you catch Hoseok smile amusedly in yours and Seokjin’s direction that you have to hush him down, and he gives you a huge thumbs up as a way to emphasize what a great job you were doing. Before you exit onto your floor and he leaves for his office, he wishes both of you good luck and you simply shake your head at that with a small smile.

You head down the hallway and towards your cubicle with Seokjin following behind you. Once you reach your work station, you notice Yoongi peer his head above the plastic and then lower it as he realizes it’s just you and Seokjin, refocusing on his work instead.

“Alright,” You turn to him, “Both of us should get back to work.”

He groans, “Not this again.”

You raise a brow at that, but then you notice the dismayed expression on his face.

“We have to get started on work.” You persist with a reminder, “You know, because of your training…”

You’re expecting some complaints here and there, but his lips are set into a firm line and his arms are crossed. Normally, you would have just continued on as usual, but it isn’t until‒

“Uh-huh.” The sarcasm in his tone is blatantly obvious, “That sounds fantastic.”

You blink wide-eyed.

Seokjin slumps against the desk, hand pressing against his cheek. 

His apathetic eyes dart over to you, taking notice of the confused stare you throw in his direction.

“What?”

“Do you…” You continue to probe, “Do you really hate working at the office that much?”

“Depends on my mood but generally, yes.” He honestly states.

But you’re still confused, “Not everyone has the luxury of getting such a good entry position in the office.”

“Well, not everyone wants to willingly kill off all their brain cells for that luxury.” He counteracts.

You frown, still taken aback from the sudden change. Things usually came easier for you because you like working in the office and you’re good at it, but that doesn’t take away the fact that you’re still chasing after a position that will most likely take a decade to come into your hands.

And yet someone with the opportunity that’s been handed to them, someone who won’t even have to work towards such a position, could quite literally hate it.

“I see…” You begin, your brows knitting together.

You know you can’t let this opportunity, this chance, slip so easily from you after Soyou finally acknowledged your skills. There has to be somethingyou can do to fix this. 

Thinking back, you wonder if maybe your approach is just wrong – if maybe there was a way you could figure out what makes him want to stay rather than run away, if you could just somehow negotiate–

Your eyes flicker.

Planting your two hands against the table, you lean forward.

“Alright then ‒ what’s your deal?”

Seokjin blinks, “What?”

“Five minutes.” You grin, raising your hand to clarify, “I’ll give you a five-minute window to negotiate with me as much as you want. To establish an agreement between us for you to want to work here from now on.”

Seokjin stares at you like you’ve just offered him the most bizarre idea ever, but you on other hand, know how to play the business card. Negotiations are common in creating contracts and making decisions, so if you could just create one with him in which both parties can be happy, you hope it’ll dim down his desire of hating the workplace.

“Okay…” He cautiously begins, as if testing the waters, “I guess…more breaks?”

He sits properly in his chair now, carefully considering, “I can’t handle just one break through the day. Constantly working is too stuffy for me.”

“That’s agreeable.” You fumble around your drawer for a moment as you listen to him, soon yanking out a blank piece of paper that you scribble the term on.

“What’s next?”

Seokjin places a finger against his chin, “We can’t stay in one place. I’d like to move around more so show me around other floors in this building or something.”

You write it down, “After seeing you run away at every opportunity, I can agree with this one.”

“I did that once.” He interjects.

“And I’m going to pretend you weren’t trying for a second time down at the elevator.” You say as you write, glancing at him, “Alright, next?”

“Um…maybe go easy on the work stuff?” He states, growing surer by the minute, “You kind of rush over things easily and it’s hard to understand.”

“Could have told me that on day one when I asked you, but okay.” You murmur.

“Once you admit I caught you staring at me, then maybe.” He retorts back with a wink and you roll your eyes.

“Just keep going.”

“Okay…oh!” He snaps his fingers, “You have to take me out to some nearby decent restaurant.”

You blink, “What?”

He shrugs, “I spend all my time here and the last time I escaped, I saw some places to eat around.” He waves at the paper like he doesn’t want you questioning him, “Just write it down.”

“Fine.” You state, adding it in. Staring at the paper in full, you nod. “Alright, looking good so far.”

“What are your terms?” He softly questions.

“Huh?” You stare at him, not expecting him to actually ask, “Oh, um–“

You smile knowingly, “I guess they’re just properly focus when you’re working alongside me and don’t run away again.”

He smiles, “Alright, that’s agreeable.”

You narrow your eyes, “Did you just mimic me?”

“I’m sorry, isn’t it your job to train me?” He chides.

You raise your hands up in defense, “Touché.”

After adding in some tweaks here and there, you solidify both your conditions and Seokjin’s. It surprised you how easily it was to negotiate and come up with an agreement that both of you were okay with.

You smile at the result, “Now all we have to do is implement this.”

***

Your fingers glide against the keyboard as your type, generating up a report. 

Seokjin furrows his brows, scrutinizing the paper before him for about five minutes before he clears his throat.

“Uh, so, in conclusion, sales have been rough…?”

You grimace, “Not quite….”

At his blank expression, you shift closer to him, “Gross profit is the region you need to look at, it’s essentially the total profit the company’s made once you take away the costs involved in producing the product and the services required to supply it.”

You flip through the papers and point to a particular page with a bunch of graphs, “This is the diagram that shows the amount of gross profit over the calendar year, with this,” You point over to the last product launch, “showcasing our lowest point.”

You peer up at Seokjin – who has a finger against his chin and his eyes are narrowed, like he was actually paying attention.

“I just have one question.” He brings up.

“What?”

“Why on earth do I need to know all of this?”

A loud exhale leaves you, baffled by the inquiry.

“Are you being serious right now?”

He narrows his eyes, “Do I not look serious to you?” 

Letting out another sigh, you try not to linger on his words and ultimately retract your steps, “Okay, so–“ You flip through the pages until you can locate the first graph again. “Gross profit is important to know in sales because it helps us understand how much profit the company can make from its merchandise.”

You point toward the multiple charts again, “And exhibit B, our profit throughout the years with the latest product being close to the worst since the product didn’t sell.”

“So it’s important because it tells us the current profit the company makes and looking at it throughout the years helps with figuring out the low points.” Seokjin literates.

“Aka the ones to avoid, which can help forecast and predict new ones for the future, which is the root of what my job is.”

Seokjin stares at you in awe, “That…actually makes sense.”

You knowingly smile, and there’s a head of russet hair peering over in your cubicle.

“You sound like you’re making progress.” Yoongi smirks, “Does this mean I can have a noise agreement made?”

Seokjin responds this time, “You can try, apparently Y/N’s really good at doing five-minute negotiations.”

You scoff, “Just interpret your sales or I’ll get Yoongi to tell you a dad joke this time.”

Yoongi snaps his head around, staring at you like you’ve just asked the worst possible thing from him. Seokjin however, beams with the news.

“I’d love to hear some from him!”

Yoongi doesn’t miss a heartbeat to shut down that idea, “No.”

“Oh come on Yoongiii.” Seokjin laughs, “I know you secretly love them~”

Yoongi helplessly peers at you, “What have you done?”

You laugh, “Hopefully, something good.”

[lchufflepuffcorn]

500 followers prompt!!

Happy 500 to me! Here is something for you to enjoy as a show of my gratitude.

Being Aemon Targaryen's wife

Words: 695

Warning: Just self-comfort and opinion.

Author's note: I hate the angst surrounding Aemon and the way people write Mean!Aemon as if it wasn't some shield of protection he shows people.

Masterlist OG W Masterlist

Being Aemond Targaryen's wife would not be a piece of cake. You'd have to come from a known and powerful family, raised in the proper ways deemed by the royal court. It's also probably (almost certainly) a marriage of convenience. 

Being Aemond's wife means being mannerly to each other and doing most of your duties without whining (almost because some aspects of marriage can be hard to conduct, especially when you don't know each other). Polite, but not without the coldness that Aemond shows everyone that he's not blood-related (or close to). 

Not that he's not trying to make you comfortable, mind you. He knows well that being wed to the disfigured member of the Targaryen family is not a feat many ladies would be proud of: If he's not to be pretty, he could be gentle with you to compensate. 

Bonus points for you if you're friendly to his mother and sister. That would help warm him up to your shared situation. He'd gladly escort you to the gardens, where you'd meet his sister for a walk. He'd linger near the doors of his mother's quarters if you're having tea there, etc. Aemond's the sort of guy that would prioritize friendship over love in his marriage because love can grow from comradeship. But he damn well knows you can't force love out of anywhere. 

Aemond remembers the little things. How you like your afternoon tea, what you favour to read most, how you ask for your bath. He buys the jewels that would compliment your garments best with the style you prefer. He'd show some unexpected act of kindness like proposing the plate of your most liked food during meals or giving you single flowers because that man knows that a whole-ass bouquet is troublesome to carry. He'd give you his arm when walking upstairs too. 

That would be your privilege as his wife. 

Now, if you'd become close enough for him to regard you as his lady wife, that would bring some changes. 

You'd now be private to his worst times, too, because Aemond does not have the merriest life. He wouldn't show you his eye often. Aemond doesn't like it and knows how his mother feels about his eyes. I'd imagine it's deeply ingrained in his long life-accumulated list of traumas. 

Now, like Helaena and Aemond's mother, you'd get your dedicated soft-eyed smirk-like smile from him when you're together. You'd get gentler and spontaneous touches at unexpected instants, and his hands would always touch you if he could get away with it. A warm hand on the small of your back. Gentle, feather-like touches on your cheeks when you smile, light kisses on your forehead when you embrace. Adoring looks were thrown your way whenever you walked by during the day. 

You'd get so many love-drunk and adoring professions, deep in the night, breathy promises and passionate kisses, reverent touches whenever you'd give him so much as a gentle kiss and loving touches in your shared chambers. 

Now, Aemond is not a kind man. He's cold, taciturn, and manipulative. He knows how to use a sword skillfully. When angry, he's not something you'd want for your worst enemy. There are moments you now know not to disrupt him, even if he tries not to muddle your life and his drama. Not too much. Aemond enjoys sword fighting with you to keep his mind off of things. Or have him watch while he fights, be it in training or during a tournament. 

Aemond doesn't care much for children. He likes them because they are the only humans still not corrupted by the world. But he doesn't really see the need to have them himself considering his own brother is the king. For Aemond's children to become legitim to reign, Aegon would need to die, they Helaena, if their children are not of age. Then the twins would have to die as well. Long story short, it's a long process or a tragedy. Either way, Aemond is convinced it cannot happen. 

 Aemond is content if he has children, and he doesn't mind if you ask to keep having moon tea delivered to your quarters. 

[the-trinket-witch]

Practically Perfect Ch. 10

(Ch 11|Ch 9|Ch 1) (YAY THE BEGINNINGS OF FISH LUVIN'S)

     “Well, it’s not bad. Think I could have done better, honestly, but between everything else, kinda surprised I had enough time to study,” Albert lamented among a sea of equally exasperated students, each with their attention to the Test Score Board. “28 out of the Top 50, what did you all get?”

    Ace sighed in relief, “I got a 94, where’s that put me in the ranking?”

    “Same here,” Deuce said, “We gotta place somewhere pretty high up there.”

    Ace, Deuce and Grim’s eyes all scanned the board; their expressions darkened as their eyes trailed further and further down the list. Ace didn't believe what he was seeing; back to the top of the list he scrolled but...his name didn't show amongst the top 50.

    “B-but if I don’t make it, I’ll be in breach of contract!” Grim said.

    “W-wait… ‘Contract’? Oh Grim, you didn’t…” Ace groaned.

    “Judging by the look on your face, Ace, don’t tell me you also-” Deuce said.

    “What? What did you three d-” Albert started, before being answered with the sight of anemones sprouting from his three friends’ heads. “What is that?! What’d you do?!”

    “Grim you cheater!” Deuce yelled.

    “Yeah, whatever, Deuce. You're just as guilty, 'keepin' your friends close and your anemones closer' over there!” Ace replied.

    Albert stifled a chuckle at the pun, just as Jack tore through the crowd.

    “Why am I not surprised all that commotion was you all? And what is that on your heads?”

    Ace replied, “Wait, you didn’t sign a contract too, right? You don’t have an anemone on your head.”

    “I’m completely lost, an anemone?” Al asked.

    “MROW! Ah, it’s pullin’ at my head! It's gonna rip my fur off!” Grim cried as he began stumbling away, seemingly not of his own accord.

    “Wait-is this what he meant by ‘absolute obedience’?” Deuce asked, his anemone seeming to reel him in as well as Ace.

    Albert, Jack and Yuu could only watch the trio stumble away, exchanging abjectly confused looks.

    “Is this dumb picture really worth 1000 words?” Jack asked.

    “Based on what I’m seeing, it might not even need 500. Should we see where they’re getting dragged to?” Albert replied.

    “You wanna drag me into this? Sounds a lot like ‘Not my Circus, Not my Tigers’.”

    Yuu egged Jack on, and with a resigned sigh, the three of them trudged behind. Their trail ended in the hall of mirrors, which seemed to accumulate quite a lot more students than just the three. They could only watch as the congregation migrated their ways through the Mirror to Octavinelle’s dorm. Yuu and Albert exchanged worried but curious glances; Jack trudged on, nonplussed.

    Albert and Yuu followed his lead, to be met with an unexpected change of scenery. What once was the Hall of Mirrors was replaced with a large glass dome at what seemed like the bottom of the ocean. Albert could only stare and drink in the scenery. He blinked to regain sense once he noticed his companions had already moved along. The three finally met back with the others in a rather extravagant lounge. Quiet ambiance played amongst the whispers and whines of the folks filling the space.

    “How many people are there?” Jack started, “1-maybe 200?”

    “There’s independent businesses running out of this college? Didn’t have anything like this in Royal Sword,” Albert whispered. A sign caught his eye, “Monstro Lounge? Wait! This is where-”

    “Welcome, everyone! Quite the throng of unfortunate souls, we have here. Everyone here couldn’t make the cut of the Top 50, I’d assume, so: Welcome to The Monstro Lounge! I’ll assume you all are aware of who I am, and for those who don’t, allow me to introduce myself: I am Azul Ashengrotto. Some would know me as Dorm Leader of Octavinelle, or even just the owner of this lounge. But, as of today, you will all know me as: your new boss. You’ve made a deal, and per your contracts, since you’ve not been able to fulfill your ends and break the Top 50, you are all under my orders.”

    “Hey! That's not fair! You gave us the study guide, and we were supposed to get over 90!” One voice rang out. “Right-if everyone got at least a 90, there’d be no way everybody would make it with the deck being so stacked!” Another cried.

    “Come now, all you fools- gentlemen -had your reasons for asking my assistance, and Client Confidentiality dictates the details on who had made a contract with me, for what reason and the type are all privileged data. I’d like to see myself as a man of integrity, so how could I divulge such private details, like how many of you asked for a study guide, to others? You would all also find this topic extensively listed out on page 127 of your contracts. I’ve just abided by the terms,” Azul stated.

    The room rumbled with questions. “What happens to my water magic?” “Give me back my signature spell!” and notably from Grim, “What happens to my fire magic that I put up as collateral?”

    Azul chuckled, “"Should you have earned a spot among the school's fifty highest achievers, your power would be returned to you, and I would continue to provide you with study guides for all exams until such time as you graduate." His expression darkened with a sick glee that Al didn’t know he could make. "However, in the event that you did not earn a spot among the school's fifty highest achievers, you will act with absolute obedience to me until such time as you graduate." Tones of protest drowned out the mellow tunes from the air. “As outlined in the contract, I now control every part of your beings down to the very last hair on your heads. In other words, your powers are mine, to return or not as I please.”

    The three exchanged worried looks, but Jack was quick to lash out. “Grrr, You all disgust me!”

    Azul’s attention darted toward the back, and with a sigh said, “Ah, and you might be? Hmm, No anemone on your head, so I’ll assume you have no stake in this. If you don’t, I would ask that you leave; as we are having a staff meeting.”

    “I do have a stake in it! I studied fairly, and had planned to outscore these guys just as fairly. And you ruined that!”

    Grim cried out, “Jack, Albert, Yuu! You guys’re here to save us?”

    Jack huffed, “Don’t get it wrong, you all disgust me-slimy back-room dealers and lazeabouts alike.”

    “I-ya know? You’re right. You’ve given me the wake-up call I needed. If you wanna win, you gotta snatch that victory yourself! In other words...If I can snatch my contract from him by force and tear it up, it's null and void!” Grim’s words rippled through the crowd, everyone whipping up to mob the one responsible for the whole affair. No sooner did the mob surround Azul were they all thrown back by either some magical force or the thrust of the twins who had since flanked him. Ashengrotto tutted, obviously foreseeing such an outcome.

    “No magic can harm these documents, no matter what kind of magic thrown at it. With those anemones on your heads, you all have no choice other than to obey, until I see fit to remove them. Now, if we’ve all had our fun,” He clapped, springing everyone with an anemone to attention, “You can all start by cleaning up the mess you’ve made. This group here can start ingredient prep. Now, off you go! Floyd, Jade, do lend a hand on instructing the new staff, please?”

    The two familiar-looking individuals in similar fashion to their boss swooped in to agree, only to scamper away with their orders. Azul, now free from distraction, approached Yuu, Jack and Albert, the smile not once leaving his face.

    “Ah, you must be Jack Howl. And Albert, lovely to meet again. And if I’ve heard right, you go by ‘Yuu’; while I would like to stay and banter, I have to kindly request you leave. I have some business to attend to-new hires and all-but please: feel welcome to drop by as customers whenever you’d like. If you three’ll excuse me, then…” Azul motioned the three to shoo.

    The three slowly retreated, still processing what just happened. Al hadn’t had much interaction with Azul outside of meetings so he wasn’t sure whether this was the ‘real’ Azul or some type of persona.

    “Damn...we’re gonna need to regroup; figure out what’s going on,” Jack muttered through gritted teeth.

    Albert stopped suddenly, the other two stopping shortly after. “Wait-I think I have an idea. Give me a moment with him. I think I know a way we can at least start trying to get a leg up on the situation.. I’ll try gathering intel from ‘the inside’-you two find out what you can on the outside.”

    “I don’t take orders from anyone but Leona…” Jack started, but quickly deflated, “But we don’t have anything else to go by. If you’ve got a plan already, meet up with us back at your dorm as soon as you can.”

    “Thank you, I won’t come back empty-handed.”

    At that, Yuu and Jack retreated, leaving Albert left in the lounge. He turned and marched towards the bar, his umbrella clasped at his side for his nerves’ stability. He gave a steadying exhale before approaching the steely-haired second-year behind the bar.

    “Hmm, my apologies, I must not have made myself clear. Regardless of Dorm Head, vice or otherwise, if you aren’t here as clientele, I have to insist you leave to allow space for paying customers,” Azul hissed.

    “And apologies from me, for the behavior of my compatriots. Please understand: Jack is a bit of a… ‘ruff’ personality, and I hope he hadn’t cause offense,” Albert started, “I was actually, quite honestly, on my way to this lounge, as you’d offered a while ago, before meeting up with the other two. I had heard, as well recently, you were in need of staff for this, might I say, rather extravagant experience you’ve built here. With your new ‘influx’ of faculty, I feel I may have missed out on being part of such an experience,” Albert feigned a sigh. “I had a mind to offer services-back of house-before convening with Yuu and Jack. Being Dorm Leader is definitely a fantastic item for anyone’s resume. but as someone trying to round out their skillset to be as esteemed a personal assistant that an Eastwind could be, this seemed like an ample foothold, but I feel in this case I may have just missed the boat…”

    Azul paused for a moment in polishing a glass. A smirk began to creep along his face at Albert’s words. “One dorm head serving another? Interesting proposition. You mention being an Eastwind, quite a prestigious name heading a company of assistants and secretaries many clamor to have within their service. You seem to have learned quite well how far flattery can bring you. I’d like to think of myself as a generous man, so, permit me to re-acquaintance myself on a better foot. I believe I am still in the market for, let’s say, a chef? Is that not a task in most personal assistants’ repertoire?”

    “If I weren’t able to cook under the pressure of volumes of clientele, let alone pressures of the bottom of the sea, then what kind of personal assistant would I be?” Albert cocked his head, a vulpine smirk on his lips.

    Ashengrotto paused, taking the moment to contemplate the offer. A quick laugh broke the tension, “Ha! In the face of everything, you would still offer services to me? Understand: nothing is ever catch-free. Should I take you on as staff, what would you ask of me in return?”

    “Straight to the point, I see: I ask that you permit me a week to provide outstanding culinary service. The deal is complete, no harm, no foul, and we maybe strengthen ties between dorms? Maybe provide a business reference once we graduate?”

    The silence between the two drowned out the chatter of the lounge as Azul contemplated. He resumed polishing glassware as he thought, eventually stopping to turn towards Albert. 

    “Seems a very one sided offer, Mr. Eastwind. A week of cooking for a business reference? Quite the offer in my favor-which I always like-but no mention of what you plan on offering as collateral? Say Something happens to where you aren’t able to fulfill that duty, or the service offered is shown to be lackluster. What do you bring to the table, should you fail?”

“Out planning ahead already? Kindred spirits, I’d think. I’d like to think I wouldn’t sully my dorm or family name by getting sacked of all things. If some unfortunate circumstance were to get in the way of me fulfilling my contract, I would say the best I could offer would be a taste of what the Eastwind’s business managerial services has to offer to the Monstro Lounge as well as your dorm, all on your order, until we graduate.”

“Interesting offer. Managerial assistance and dorm maintenance? You don’t believe you have any such magic that would serve as decent collateral?”

“Regrettably so-I wouldn’t want to waste your time with something so menial, even to me.”

     Azul had since moved to wiping the bar down to keep in sight of his client. He stopped to digest the offer, before cracking a knowing grin. “You have a surprising amount of gall, and an equally surprising way with words. Offering to cook for my lounge for a week, for a business reference, or your entire servitude to me, should you fail? Come with me; let’s draft the finer details of this negotiation in my office. Let’s Make a Deal~”

     Hours had passed in the lounge before the VIP door finally reopened. Albert was first to walk out, his umbrella in his hand like a marching baton, close to beaming with satisfaction. Azul followed close behind with his signature knowing smile. 

     “A pleasure doing business, Mr. Eastwind. I look forward to seeing you in action tomorrow. Please, allow me to have your new coworkers escort you safely back. Floyd, Jade?" Azul called before retreating back to his office. 

     "Ah, Hello again~Please follow us," one purred, both flanking either side of the man. 

     He maintained pace with the two, even with their height allowing for longer strides. At the door the two swung around to once again face him.

     Jade started, "This is our stop, so for now we bid farewell. Hope you enjoyed your time at the Monstro Lounge." Floyd finished, "See ya tomorrow, hehe, hope you're ready to keep up~"

     Albert gave Floyd a reassuring knock on the chest with the umbrella and juggled eye contact with the twins. "Rest easy on that, gentlemen," he said as he passed, "But I do hope my pace doesn't leave you too far behind, if our round of ‘tag’ was any indication."

     The twins exchanged looks, either in amusement or annoyance.

     "My my, he's quite tricky. But, sooner or later, all smallfry slip up, and he'll fall in line just like the rest," Jade said, his smile never wavering.

     "Ehh~Looks like fun~ I dunno what I wanna see more: how fast he actually is, or how fast he crashes and burns," Floyd replied with a barely contained glee. 

[chthonicathenean]

There's a couple different directions that this could go. One is someone whining about how they can't get their french fries boo hoo hoo, and yeah that's bad and they should feel bad.

The one that I feel is just slowly gathering a collection of places that I Do Not Patronize because of whatever evil reasons there are, and as they accumulate (because no one seems to be getting better) it starts to get hard to even remember who is bad for what reason. It's a boycott on top of an attempt to at least partially ethically consume. Most of the places on the list are already businesses I don't patronize because I have better options, but I can see the list growing longer being a cause of fatigue. I feel the solution to this is to narrow the focus down to the specific boycott of the moment and ease up on the other strictures (like don't eat at Jimmy John's or Papa John's because fuck those guys).

The really frustrating thing is to see people berating anyone who can't fully boycott every company on the list because of whatever situation they're in. I'm seeing all these supposedly "easy" alternatives that just aren't universal. Yeah, I personally have a billion options, but what about the person who works in a building that has a McDonald's next door and they have a 10 minute break and haven't been able to pack themselves lunch this week? Or someone who doesn't have a car and public transportation is shit where they live, so their level of effort to get somewhere else is much higher than someone who can just drive wherever they want whenever they feel like it. It's easy to say "There are so many other fast food places" but you don't know everyone's situation. Maybe look at other context to see whether someone is just doing the best they can or are an entitled jerk who won't sacrifice even the smallest thing.

"Boycott fatigue" what do you mean a boycott is literally where you DONT do something like how get fatigued from not buying mcdonalds

[becausemyheartfeelssoheavy]

9.17.24

I grab my tea as I make my way to the back door. Zoë shuts it behind me, alarms the house, and locks the door. I notice the rain as we make our way to the car and cover my glasses to prevent raindrops from accumulating on them. Zoë unlocks the passenger door and quickly plops herself in the seat.

"Woah! What are you doing???" I ask as she holds out the keys for me.

"Come on, I drove us to Louisville last time!" Zoë intentionally whines.

"Yeah, you drove us there because I didn't want to go!" I sigh, reluctantly grab the keys, and make my way over to the driver's seat. I start the car, pull out of the driveway, and make my way to the bypass, following it to I-75 north.

I'm thinking about COPE and how crazy it is that it has been 10 years since the record was released. So much has happened in these 10 years, and my life is not at all what I thought it would be. Most of it is good, but I wish other things had played out differently. When I was nineteen, I had hardly any tools in my toolbox for building a successful future. I had no idea what I was doing. I still don’t really know what I’m doing. As I merge onto I-75, I'm reminded of what I always think of when driving on this road.

"I can't believe you're making me drive to Cincinnati to see Manchester Orchestra for the 10th Anniversary of COPE."

Zoë analyzes me, trying to figure out what I could be referring to.

"Just so fuckin' rude," I joke, trying to lighten my mood.

"Ohhhhh," Zoë says as the connection is made. "I didn't even think about that."

"Of course you didn't. Why would you?" My thoughts are not created out of judgment toward her or disappointment. It's just a fact. Why would she think about a traumatic experience of mine that she hardly knows anything about, really? We weren't together, just friends. She didn't know about any of my dating history at the time and I hardly ever talk about it now.

November 23rd, 2013

"What do you mean Zoë and Adam are going to the show?" Sams asks me as her face begins to harden. I can't bring myself to look at her, so I just stare at the road.

"I told you that Andy put us on the guest list for the Newport show after we met him after the North Carolina show. What was I supposed to tell them? No, you can't accept Andy's offer to see the show for free because Sams is going to that show? Also, there was no way for me to be able to go without being put on the guest list! Newport was sold out!"

"What the fuck were you thinking?! What are we supposed to do now?! What's the story here? That we just planned to come together? We were supposed to go to this together without worrying about running into other people!" Her voice is growing angrier after every sentence until she's screaming at me.

I stop understanding words, and my whole body is on fire. I feel myself beginning to shake, so much so that all I can do to stop shaking is grip the steering wheel with everything I have.

"I just can't fucking believe you don't understand the gravity of this situation!"

"Well, it was getting there via the guest list or not going at all." I say quietly.

"Well, I'm happy for you, Niamh. I'm happy you're gonna get to go to this show with your fucking friends to see my favorite fucking band that I've been following since fucking high school at my favorite fucking venue without me!"

"Without you?" I ask, stunned and confused.

She picks up her phone and starts texting.

"You've made it abundantly clear that you cannot think through things like an adult. If you want me to be there, you better stop acting like a fucking kid and grow up!"

After another 20 minutes of what feels like an eternal silence, she breaks it.

"Turn off at this exit." She demands coldly.

"Why?" I asked as I begin to worry. I have no idea where she is taking me.

"Just fucking do it, Niamh!" She screams.

I pull off and follow her directions until we arrive at an apartment complex.

"I'm gonna crash here with a friend of mine. Come get me immediately after the show ends. Have a good fucking time." She says with pure disgust as she exits the car and slams the door.

I sit in the parking lot and watch her walk into the apartment. I drive the last 20-minute stretch in complete silence and shock.

"Do you want me to drive?" Zoë asks.

"Oh, no," I say, shaking my head. "I'm okay. I always think about that initial drive to see Manchester when I'm on this road, and it is bizarre that I'm driving it to see Manchester….on their COPE tour…again."

"Yeah, I get that," she says empathetically.

Once in the venue, we found a good spot to stand and wait for Sean, Bailey, and Tyler. I am very unimpressed by the opening band.

"Hello Cincinnati!" the lead singer screams into his mic. "We're Militarie Gun, and we are so excited to be with you tonight and on tour with Manchester Orchestra! Let's actually give it up for Manchester Orchestra!!!!"

The crowd erupts in applause and cheering.

"I gotta say, those dudes are the best guys on the planet,” The lead singer continues. “Andy was so kind as to respond to a message my band sent him, and we ended up singing a song together. After that, we flew from LA to Atlanta to hang out with the band and get to know each other. The rest is history. I'm so honored to know them, and this next song is the song Andy so kindly sang on for us! It's called My Friends Are Having A Hard Time!"

Zoë and I immediately lock eyes in utter disbelief.

"Yo, if they can do a song with Andy, we can," I say adamantly.

"That was my thought exactly," Zoë says.

"We need to reach out to him ASAP."

"Agreed!" she says.

Once the openers close, I desperately explain to Bailey and Tyler that Manchester is lightyears better than what we just saw, and Sean chimes in. "Yeah, Manchester is one of the few bands that somehow sounds so much better live than they do on their albums, and their albums are phenomenal. You're about to see the quality of the music go from here to here."

"One thing I love about Manchester is that they'll write this heavy rock album and name it COPE, and then, the next year, they will release acoustic versions of the songs that will rip your heart out and name it HOPE. The fact that Andy's music can translate like that from one genre to the next is amazing." Zoë says.

Sean and I begin reminiscing about various openers we've seen open for Manchester that were a way better fit than Militarie Gun. From Julien Baker to Michigander, Militarie Gun was the worst.

"Though, I will say that the best lineup I've seen Manchester in was when we went to New York to see them open for MCR and Blink."

"You're welcome!" I poke. There are few bands that Sean has adopted from me. Manchester is the one that actually stuck.

The lights dim, and the crowd begins to erupt once more as Andy Hull takes the stage with Robert, Andy 2.0, and Tim. Andy picks up his red telecaster and begins to play COPE from beginning to end, with a few surprises along the way.

Phone dials…

"Hello?!" Zoë asks on the other end.

"Hey, where are you guys? I can't get in without you all, and it's freezing out here." I say through my chattering teeth.

"We're still about 30 minutes out."

I throw my head back in disappointment.

"Okay, well, I'm in line for us."

Adam's car had been in and out of the shop, so Josh had to bring them to Newport. Earlier in the day, Zoë had asked me to come and pick them up to bring them to the show. I told them I wouldn't have enough time to pick them up between work and the show, which was not a good enough reason because I absolutely did. Zoë eventually told me that her Dad would take them up but might not make it on time because they had to wait for him to leave work. My stomach is twisted in knots as I think about the series of events that have taken place that have ultimately left me waiting outside in the negative temperatures alone. My loyalty to my best friends and partner is at odds, and I cannot explain why. There's no way for me to explain to anyone. No one knows about me. Even if they did, no one can know about us.

Half an hour later, Zoë, Adam, and Josh join me outside.

"Hey man," Adam approaches the doorman. "We should be on the guest list to attend the show tonight."

"Name?" the doorman asks.

"Adam Burge."

"Do you have an ID?"

Adam pulls his wallet out to prove that it is who he says he is.

"So, it's you and who else?" the doorman says while looking over Adam’s shoulder.

"Zoë and Niamh." He says, pointing to us.

"Okay, here are your wristbands." He says and puts them on us one by one while simultaneously putting x's on our hands.

"I'm not here for the show, but if you guys have a bathroom I could use really quick, I would appreciate that. I'm her Dad." Josh chimes in from behind us while gesturing toward Zoë.

"Yeah, man." The doorman says and lets us all in. "The bathroom is just down that hall and to the right."

"Thanks," Josh says and follows us inside.

Josh heads to the bathroom as Zoë, Adam, and I head into the sanctuary toward the stage.

"This is so crazy that we're getting to see them again!" Zoë says while looking around the room.

"Yeah, and this venue is sweet!" Adam says.

I am hardly present now as her words keep ringing in my ears.

I'm happy you're gonna get to go to this show with your fucking friends to see my favorite fucking band that I've been following since fucking high school at my favorite fucking venue without me!"

I can feel my anxiety trying to claw its way through my chest as I look around at The South Gate House. This venue used to be a church and has beautiful stained glass windows lining the walls, with the organ pipes still in the wall behind the stage.

"This place is cool," Josh says as if he just teleported behind us.

"Yeah. It is." I say to him.

"How did you get in here?" Zoë asks.

"I just walked in after I went to the bathroom. I probably don't need to stay, though. I should probably head back home."

My heart sinks into my stomach.

"Head back home?" I ask, trying not to panic.

"Yeah, I don't have a ticket, so I don't need to hang out. You can bring them home, right?" Josh asks, looking at Zoë and Adam.

"I mean, you're in here now! You like Manchester, right?" I ask him.

"Yeah, I do." Josh says, debating whether he should break the rules and stay.

"You should stay, Josh!" Adam says, attempting to hype Josh up.

"Yeah, if you're already here, you should stay, Dad. You'll love this." Zoë says, smiling at Josh.

"Well, I guess I can stay to see how it is and go from there." Josh nods.

I take a deep breath of relief. Sams would end me if I had to bring them home. She would be stranded at her friend's place.

We endure The Front Bottoms' opening act as I try my best to maintain my composure and avoid having a panic attack at the thought of Josh leaving at any point during the show. Once they exit the stage, we wait for Manchester. Zoë and Adam are beaming and look like they could combust due to their excitement. On the other hand, I can barely breathe, let alone crack so much as a small smile.

I can't live like this.

The show was incredible, as always. I'm not sure there has been a Manchester Orchestra show I've intentionally skipped out on. Andy is an entirely different level of raw talent. Everything he touches turns to gold. He is so genuine, honest, vulnerable… and so talented. I sometimes wish I could say that his fingerprints haven't been left on the music I've written, but I can always find traces of him in the layers of the music I write. He was the main musical inspiration of Me & You. It was a happy accident, I guess.

The crowd was so attentive that Andy stopped the show several times to thank the crowd for being the best crowd on the tour. I am always so star-struck that I hardly pay attention to anything else around me when Andy is on the stage. I would never dare to break the magical atmosphere that Andy creates. The idea of rowdiness or fighting during a Manchester show seems incomprehensible. It's just magic.

Once Manchester finished playing through COPE in its entirety, they exit the stage. I can't help but think about everything over the last 10 years that has placed me here in this moment. More painfully, where I was 10 years ago.

The lights dim, and the crowd cheers as Andy takes the stage. One of my all-time musical idols stands before me again, and I feel nothing. Nothing feels like it will be okay. He picks up his iconic red telecaster and instantaneously opens with Shake It Out. The crowd erupts into song with Andy as he begins to sing, and I can't bring myself to utter a sound for fear that if I allowed myself to feel anything, I would lose it.

Shake it out, shake it out

God, I need another and another and another and another

I could feel it now

I felt the Lord in my father's house

And I can see, I can see

Standing, we were seventeen, make it clean

Are you the living ghost of what I need?

Are you getting the best of me?

We will see

I wince as Andy sings, "Are you tired of being alone?"

'Cause I'm done being done with a funeral

At least for now

Are you tired of being alone?

Are you tired of being alone?

Shake it out, shake it out

Tired of another and another wasn't really what I wanted

So we bled it out

Over the floor of my neighbor's house

And I could see, I could see

God, I've never seen a thing so complete

I am the living ghost of what you need

I am everything eternally

God, just speak

If only God would speak to me, but I guess that's my fault too. He doesn't speak to people like me.

'Cause I'm done being done with a funeral

At least for now

Are you tired of being alone?

Are you tired of being alone?

So speak to me

Oh God, you got to shake it out, shake it out

You got to take it out, take it down

I've got to come around

I need it now more than I ever have

There is a small musical interlude here where the music drops out until it's just one guitar before Andy sings the bridge:

Oh God, you've got to shake it out, shake it out

You've got to break it down, break it out

You've got to come around

I feel it now more than I ever have

I could feel myself shatter at this moment. Suddenly, it is as though I'm hearing this song for the very first time. Or maybe it's never been made more apparent to me than at this moment just how broken I am. Something in me that was hanging on by a thread has just come crashing down.

I felt the Lord begin

To peel off all my skin

And I felt the weight within

Reveal a bigger mess

That you can't fix

I swear, I swear I'll go

Lead me into my home

Don't stop, don't ever go

I swear you'll never know

You'll never know

As the song builds back up, whatever hole was created in me starts filling with something else, something that's been slowly numbed over the last two years. Rage. And as that rage takes hold of my heart, I scream the last lines of the song:

What have I done? I can't fix this. Not on my own.

I'm trapped and don't know where to go for help.

There's no one I can go to for help.

I don't exit my rage as the show continues to throw themes of situational disasters, religious trauma, and loneliness in my face.

Oh god, you got to shake it out, shake it out

You've got to break it down, break it out

Wolves at Night:

I've got to crucify myself if I am gonna believe you

I've got to promise that I'll finish all the things I said

I'd do, to begin with too

I've got to make my bed if I am gonna lay with you

'Cause a disaster's a disaster

No matter what Christian language you drag it through

'Cause I confide in wolves at night

Well, have you seen my baby girl?

She's lonely, so lonely

Pensacola:

It took me all this time to get where I said I would never be

And I hope it's not even out there

I hope eventually you'll see what you've been turning me into

It's all for you

It feels like 37 years and I am nothing but a bank

If we could build our credit score, "Incredible," they'll surely say

But I can credit only one to focus all the fame

It has the first and last, even the middle of my very name

I am the greatest man that never lived and now I never sleep

I never lost a fight but never knew I started one the same

I never knew how capable I would become

I'm tired of talking to a wall when I could talk to someone else

It's got seven days without a word

And you're with someone somewhere else

Pale Black Eye about splits me in two:

Goddamn I'm tired of lying

I wish I loved you like I used to

So hold on, you pale black eye

No 'cause when I sleep, I sleep alone

My throat begins to close as Andy begins to play 100 Dollars. I am familiar with the story of why Andy wrote the song. One time, his Dad gave him a 100-dollar bill, and from the time he got from the kitchen to his car, he had lost the bill. He said that it was the first time his wife had ever seen him lose his shit, and it wasn't even really about the 100-dollar bill. It was about something else entirely, and the 100-dollar bill was the last straw. It feels like tonight is my final straw in a lot of ways.

So whatever you want

No, whatever you need

Take from me

Right from me

From me

I've Got Friends:

I can't play where I'm not supposed to anyway

Dirty on the ground is what I see

I need another reason why

I need another reason, tell me to breathe

The dirtier the sound, the best I breathe

I tried to do it all for you

It didn't do anything for me

'Cause I've got friends in all the right places

I know what they want

And I know they don't want me to stay

I've got friends in all the right places

I know what they want

And I know they don't want me to stay

Colly Strings is my favorite Manchester Orchestra Song. It always gets me, but it definitely hit harder this time around. One single line in that song has always shot me back to a different time in my life before any of this ever happened: Don't stop calling; you're the reason I love losing sleep.

Virgin:

No, it's never gonna be the same

Never gonna be the same

Cope:

There is a cost, my friends

Of living out some other dream to find the consequence

It comes and goes in seasons around here, I thought again

There's nothing left around to yield this sorry ignorance

There is a brief moment before Andy starts to play the intro to Everything to Nothing. I begin to sing along with him as he jumps into the song:

If I do echo I hope you never see

There is no one there that's waiting after me

And I hope if there is one thing I let go it is the way that we cope

Definitely not the things that I'm seeing

Did I think I'd see so instantly

I found a note on my grandfather's coat

When I read it out loud I got cold

As the song enters another music interlude, I think about when I hung out with Cloe Golding, and we were listening to Manchester Orchestra. She was the only other kid I knew who liked Manchester Orchestra, all because of the Sims. Apparently, the game has a Sims version of I've Got Friends on the Indy radio. This was only a few months ago, toward the end of senior year, and I was driving us to Kohl's. While we were on our way there, Everything to Nothing started playing.

'Cause he said: I'm not complaining

I was just saying I'm a man, I'm a lost one you see?

Come down with me to a place We'll get clean

And we'll meet with them eventually

You mean everything

"What do you think he means?" she asks me.

"What do you mean?" I ask her.

"Meaning everything to nothing?" Cloe says while pointing to my CD player.

"I'm not actually sure," I say while listening harder to the lyrics.

I'm instantly brought back into the moment as Andy begins to sing again:

I don't know much, but a crutch is a crutch

If it's holding you from moving on

I don't know what to do

Not anymore

Not anymore

I don't know what to do

Not anymore

Not anymore

And you

Well you mean everything

Of course, the band immediately goes into The River. This song also hits harder since I've been at odds with my faith and sexuality. It is during this song that as I sing the bridge, I think of Sams and mean what I'm singing:

You mean everything to nothing

You mean everything to nothing

You mean everything to nobody but me

I'm gonna leave you the first chance I get

After The River ends, Andy goes into his small cover of The Party's Over by Willie Nelson as the lights slowly dim:

Once the lights have completely faded, Andy and the band leave the stage as the crowd cheers. After thirty seconds or so, the crowd starts cheering,

"Turn out the lights, the party's over

they say that all good things must end

so turn out the lights, the party's over

and tomorrow we'll start the same old shit again."

"One more song! One more song! One more song!"

Eventually, the band returns to the stage, and Andy starts to play the intro to Simple Math. This puts knots back into my stomach as Simple Math was a song we dissected in Sams' class last year. It wasn't the first song I had heard of theirs. She had sent me another that the summer before.

After Simple Math, Andy starts to play the intro riff of I Can Feel a Hot One. It is heartbreakingly beautiful and always has the audience in tears. This is Andy's song about not feeling like he is enough to be a good musician. The faces always stay the same, but he lies to himself every night and says he's fine, but he is battling his own performance anxiety that would give him nightmares.

Once that song ends, The band begins to play Where Have You Been…which is Sams' favorite song from Manchester. That was the first song she sent me. Another song about being angry at God.

When the show is over, Zoë, Adam, and I leave the venue and wait by the tour bus.

"He's not going to come out, guys." The security guard says to us.

"That's fine," I begin to say through my chattering teeth as it is somehow even colder now than before the show. "We'll wait just in case. We just want to thank him."

The lights come back on as Andy and the band retake the stage for their encore set. They open with The Maze, a song about Andy's little girl, Mazie. It is an excellent intro to their incredible record, A Black Mile To The Surface. They continue into The Gold, which is such a solid crowd song. I remember when Pheobe Bridgers released her cover of The Gold way back in the day before she super blew up. It is so fantastic, as all of her covers usually are. After The Gold, they begin to play their top single from The Million Masks of God, Bed Head, another really fun crowd song and my favorite from that particular record.      

"We have one more for you all tonight,” Andy says. “Thank you again for having us and for being so kind to us. Seriously, we live in the carpool lane every day and forget that people still like our music, so thank you all for reminding us of that. You’ve been so good to us tonight."

And I can hardly believe it when Andy begins to play Shake it Out.

I shouldn't be surprised, really, but of all the songs to end on.

I take off my glasses as my eyes instantaneously begin to fill with tears in this full circle moment that is happening. I'm grateful now that my group of people is standing behind me as I am taking this final song in for all that it is and has meant to me over the years. I think about Sams sending me Where Have You Been all those years ago with a text that said,

"Someday, their music will become revelatory for you."

I can't believe it's been over ten years since that revelation came to pass. I hate that she was right but I’m also grateful because their music and the Newport show combined were the revelation that something was wrong. I was not okay or safe in that relationship. Their music helped me get out of that and understand the gravity of all of it.

Once the show is finally over, I try to snag one of Andy's guitar picks. Sean was fortunate to catch one for me and for himself.

"Walk with us, and I'll drive you to your car." He says to me as we make our exit.

We start walking and processing the show once we're out of the building. We make our way through the streets and over to Sean's car. We hop in, and he pulls out of the parking lot and begins driving on the opposite side of the venue. Zoë and I notice a small group of people by a gate who are chatting with Robert, the second guitarist in Manchester Orchestra, AKA Andy's best friend.

"That's Robert!" I say out loud, and Sean stops his car in the middle of the road. "Let me out!"

"Will you all be okay?" Sean asks.

"I hope so!" I say. "Drive safe! Thanks for getting us this far. Good to see you all!"

"Yeah, you all be safe!" Sean yells back at us as Zoë and I jump out of the car.

"Do you have any of our stuff in your wallet?" I ask Zoë as we jump onto the sidewalk.

"I'm not sure, but I'll have a look." She says as she pulls her wallet out.

By the time we reached the group, Robert had already walked away. This disappoints me, as I love talking with Robert. He is so sweet and also so insanely talented. There is a noticeable difference between Manchester's first record and the second due to the addition of Robert in the band. He adds so much to Manchester's sound.

"Well, there are still people here, so Andy probably hasn't come out yet." I say in an attempt to not only ease Zoë’s anxiety, but mostly mine.

"I don't think I have anything in my wallet. And, of course, this is the time I decide to leave my kavu at home."

"It's okay. Just getting to talk to him is what matters." I say.

We wait patiently through Andy 2.0 until Andy Hull exits the tour bus and approaches us. I can't help but laugh to myself at the sight of Andy in a t-shirt, shorts, and sandals. He has just transformed into "The Dad."

I've met Andy several times and asked him for advice, but my heart is pounding at the thought of meeting him now with an actual musical platform to refer him to. Slowly, one by one, everyone in the small group meets with Andy for signatures and/or a picture with him. He is so gracious with everyone and seems much lighter and happier than any other time I've met him. After what feels like an eternity, it's just us left.

"Hey! Nice to meet you. I'm Andy!" he says while extending his hand to me.

"Niamh," I say, trying to mask the shakiness in my voice and shake his hand.

"Niamh, okay, very cool!" He nods and looks to Zoë with his hand extended to her.

"Zoë…and it is nice to meet you again!" she laughs.

"We've met previously?" Andy asks.

"Yeah, we've seen you guys every year for like 11 years now or something," Zoë says

"Okay, amazing!" Andy responds.

"Okay, maybe not 11 years in a row." I clarify to dispel any worries about us being weird stalkers.

"But close?" Andy laughs.

"Yeah, the pandemic was in there somewhere." Zoë jokes.

"Ah, yes, I do remember that for sure." Andy laughs with us.

"Yeah, but we're musicians too-

"Sweet!" Andy interjects.

-and you gave us some advice years ago." Zoë finishes.

"Was it good advice?" Andy asks nervously.

"It was good advice," I say confidently while nodding.

"Alright, good, good...what was it???" He asks, looking between the two of us.

We're still standing in the cold an hour later in penguin formation, desperately trying to find a way to keep warm as we wait for Andy to come out of his tour bus.

"You all want to keep waiting?" I ask.

"We can't wait for much longer if my Dad is going to take us home," Zoë says.

Suddenly, the bus opens, and Andy walks out of the bus and over to the sidewalk to us.

"Hi," we all say, shaking from the cold.

"Hey!" Andy says, putting a cigarette in his mouth while joining our circle. "Did you all enjoy the show?" He asks while igniting his lighter. The heat from his lighter feels so nice on my frozen nose.

"Yeah, we did," Adam says.

"Awesome. I'm glad to hear it." Andy says while inhaling his cigarette.

"We don't want to keep you out here in the freezing cold, but we really just wanted to thank you for putting us on the guestlist for tonight. That's not something that happens every day, and it meant a lot to us." Adam says.

"Of course!" Andy says and exhales. "It's not every day people drive hours and hours to see one of our shows, so thank you all for that."

"Before we go, we just have one question for you," Zoë says.

"Okay," Andy says, still smoking his cigarette.

"We're musicians and we're trying to write more original songs. If you were to give us some life advice about writing music, what would that be?"

Andy is quiet momentarily and takes another puff of his cigarette, illuminating the contemplation on his face.

"Be vulnerable. If you allow yourself to get into that place and be vulnerable while writing, people will latch onto it because it's real."

"There's that word again." I think to myself. "Vulnerability. What does that even mean? I don't know how to do that."

“Thank you,” we say to Andy before leaving.

"Yeah, that's it.” Andy says to me after recounting his advice. “I think that…and what is funny is that it continues to be true." Andy says, locking his eyes to mine. "Like even from a self-assessment, I latch onto it. Like trying to be something else may be easier for other people, but it never feels right; it feels like poison to me. So, I dunno it just... it's good. Keep being vulnerable. Vulnerability is the key to the whole thing to obtain any kind of happiness of any kind."

"Yeah, and for sure, the key to creativity," I say.

"Yeah, I agree. And you know, connection to human beings, like this is actually who I am. Fully. Warts and all." He says still locking eyes with me.

"Take it or leave it." I nod in response.

"Yeah, this is it.” He says gesturing to himself. “And I think it makes the reward…like even though our band might not ever be a band that isn't doing something that isn't vulnerable...I dunno, I'd rather take the vulnerability and slowly build from that. I have too many friends who just-I would say, to be vulnerable with people even in your life and only have people around you who can accept...not your nastiness but like...when you become that thing that can like, I mean if I were to do that now...it would be my whole family and every single good friend in my life who would be like what are you doing, Mr. Bigshot???" We all laugh.

"Yeah, so I'm glad I didn't say something stupid," Andy says with a sincerity that makes me feel like I'm seeing a friend for the first time in a long time.

"Oh no, you absolutely did not, and we have held onto that for all these years," I say.

"And I just wanted to know if there were any other things that you would advise us because things are moving and it's going well-

"GOOD!" Andy interjects.

"Which is awesome!" Zoë says

"Yeah, that's so exciting!" Andy says.

"I mean, we aren't there yet, but we're getting there, I think." Zoë finishes.

"Yeah, yeah! I would stand by what I said and find good people around you. Like that's it. And the other thing is that if you get into a position where you have more power over people, try to eliminate that as a tool for getting what you need. Treat them as another human being." Andy says.

"Yeah, not power over power with," I say.

"Yeah, exactly. People working on our crew in our band have been the best and with us for the last 10 or 15 years. And we don't have enough money to put these people on retainers, so we are fortunate when they have a moment to actually come and do it, and the only reason they do it is because they like the feeling of us being together. Find your people. That's my next advice. Find your people. And then don't let it absolutely devastate you when some of those people have other ideas to do other things like celebrate everybody, have fun like we literally every single night we look at each other I say a prayer and then it's just like can we have fun what a gift it is to be able to go and play this show. It is a gift to us all five of us, and we say that to each other-

"And it's a gift to us!" a person from the small crowd interjects. I nod emphatically in agreement.

"Yeah! So, how good is that? We're working together, and that means the world to me. To all of us, man. Truly, we talk about it often. We're like the lamest, sweetest dues ever!" Andy laughs. "So, thank you guys."

"Thank you so much," I say.

"Of course!" he says.

"We'd love to snag a picture if that's cool," I say and hand my phone to a person in the group behind us.

"Yeah! Y'all send me your music. I'd love to hear your music. Please send it." Andy says, looking between us both.

"That would be an absolute dream," I say.

"Dude, please. Yes, done. Actually, let me write, can I see that again?" Andy asks while pointing at Zoë's ticket.

"Is this really happening right now?!?! Is Andy Hull passing along his personal information to us?!?!"

Zoë hands Andy her ticket, and he begins writing what appears to be an email on the ticket. My heart is pounding as I look off into the fourth wall.

I'm in shock and desperately trying to sit on all of the emotion building in my chest so I don't cry right there and then.

We gather for a picture, and then I turn back to Andy.

"That's a c, and that's an r; I'm sorry about my handwriting, but please send me your music, guys." Andy says while handing the ticket back to Zoë.

(For sure not crying. Just a twig in my eye or a branch.)

"Thank you, Andy," I say, and extend my hand out to him.

"Of course, guys,” He says shaking my hand and then Zoë’s. “Please be safe on your way home! Goodnight, everyone!"

Zoë and I begin to make our way back to the car.

"Are you all on Spotify?" one guy from the group asks us.

"Yes, we're fighting futures, and you can find us on all streaming platforms," Zoë says.

"Fighting Futures?" he clarifies.

"Yeah," I say.

"Perfect, just followed you all. Good luck!" he says before running off.

I pull out of the parking lot with I Can Feel a Hot One playing through my car's speakers. You would think I would be on a high after meeting Andy and obtaining his musical advice, but I can't feel anything anymore after the rage that tore through me throughout the show. I make my way back to Sams, hoping I can remember how to get back there.

I wait for a few minutes in the parking lot before she stumbles into my car, still enraged by me.

Drunk.

I just focus on the road as much as I can as I endure Sams's drunk, degrading comments shot at me until I've had all I can take and pull the car over.

"I'm this close to making you walk home or having your friend come pick you up from here because I'm done listening to you," I say, trying to hold back my rage.

"Whatever, Niamh." She says, and she leans her seat back.

I pull back onto the road and drive in silence until I know she is asleep. I turn the CD player back on and quickly turn the volume down. It's nearly 2am, and I'm beginning to nod off as I drive home. I usually get up for work at 2:30am. I start to tear up as I remember not having to go to work; I can just sleep when I get back to Lexington. I listen to I Can Feel a Hot One repeatedly as I drive home with the heat on, still shaking from the cold, or maybe it wasn't from the cold. There isn't much of a difference in the feeling. I only move to hit the back button on the CD player as the song ends and quietly harmonize with Andy to help keep myself awake. It was hardly a whisper, which was all I could muster anyway. I kept waiting for the numbness to set in and replace the gaping hole in my chest with a pain that was so strong I could hardly bear it. But it never came. There was nothing left holding me together. There wasn't enough of me to hold any of the pieces in one safe place.

I occasionally look over at Sams in the passenger seat as I think more about the record I'm listening to: Everything to Nothing. I let the songs continue until Everything to Nothing begins to play. I start sobbing to myself as I whisper along with Andy:

I don't know what to do

Not anymore

Not anymore

And you

Well you mean everything

It isn't until that moment that I understand what it means: You mean everything to nothing. At least what it means to me in this moment. I mean "everything" to someone who treats me like I'm nothing. Someone who is a dead end. Someone who is nothing. Someone with nothing to give me and only takes everything from me until nothing is left. And that is what I am now. Nothing. A shell of a person. She treated me like I was everything until I was nothing. And now she's nothing to me. I mean everything to nothing.

You mean everything to nothing

You mean everything to nothing

You mean everything to nobody but me

I'm unsure how I get us home, but we both stumble out of the car and into Sams's apartment. I think briefly about sleeping on the couch but reluctantly make my way up the stairs and to her room for fear of her becoming violent if I don't. We both collapse in bed and drift away.

"I'll drive," I say as I unlock the car for Zoë.

"Are you sure?"

"Yeah, I have my glasses, so I should be fine. I want you to write up the email to Andy."

"Okay, sounds good." She says.

We go home on the same road I took with Sams 10 years ago as Zoë is trying to decipher Andy's handwriting.

"Is it ragesails?” Zoë asks out loud. “I don't think that's an e because it looks like a c when you look at the .com at the end. Maybe it's an acronym? If it is, what does RAGC stand for???"

"Right Away, Great Captain," I say.

"Oh!!!! Yes! That's it. That has to be it."

I smile as my knowledge about Andy's music has saved the day.

"I just wanted to be sure the email was right before I sent it over. Ragcsails makes sense." She says.

It takes nearly the whole car ride home for Zoë to write and rewrite the email. She finally reads it out loud to me:

"Hey Andy!!

You gave us your contact information after the incredible show tonight up in Cincinnati, OH. We have been listening to your music for years and have met you a couple times along the way. You gave us amazing advice back then that we took to heart when writing our music, and I hope that our songs can show that.

We have several new songs we've been working on in the studio lately that aren't out just yet, but "Steps" and "Fighting Futures (Headfirst)" are great representations of our current sound. We would love to hear your feedback and any continued advice or directions for us on the next steps in this journey. Thank you SO much for always being real and so welcoming. It has honestly meant so much to us to get to continue to keep up with you & your music over the years. Keep being vulnerable and brave, and we'll strive to do the same.

Here are some links to our music and I have attached our EPK below. Please let me know if you would want us to send anything else.

"Yeah, I like that."

Love Always,

Zoë & Niamh

"Okay, I'm sending it…..now!"

"This is so crazy," I say in utter disbelief.

"I know."

"If you had told me 10 years ago after the Newport show that the next time I would come home from a Manchester show in the Cincinnati area after a 10th anniversary show of COPE, I would be crafting a personal email to Andy about my music, I would have never believed you."

Zoë is just looking at me empathetically.

"Those were dark days," I say as my throat tightens.

"I know." She says while nodding.

"Though, if anyone had told me that night that we would write our first song less than a month later, I wouldn't have believed that either."

We sit in silence for a moment before I speak again.

"Could you imagine if we got Andy to sing the third part of Stain Glass Window????"

"I would sob." Zoë says adamantly.

"Brooooooo, now that would be full circle." I laugh.

"It really would." "A girl can dream, I guess," I say as I pull off of I-75.

[jeonqkooks]

strictly platonic | jjk (teaser)

READ THE FULL FIC HERE. posted 17.07.22

Sometimes, Jungkook can be a little selfish; and sometimes, the lengths you would go to for his happiness mean relinquishing your own.

pairing: jungkook x reader

genre/warnings: best friends to lovers, college au, fake dating(ish) au, pining!, fluff, angst, smut

release date: TBD. hopefully by the beginning of july

word count: 788 for the teaser (final word count should be at least 10k, we shall see)

note: posting the teaser to actually put some pressure on me to finish this fic instead of letting it collect dust among my wips. also can y’all tell that i got lazy with the banner lol 😭

— if you’d like to be tagged when the fic gets released, go here and fill out the form ♡

Over the years, you have accumulated a list of annoying things about Jeon Jungkook.

He’s very loud, and has absolutely zero subtlety. He’s competitive—perhaps to an alarming extent—and chews with his mouth open sometimes. He’s way too stubborn for his own good and would rather eat soap than admit he’s in the wrong. He’s childish and full of pride at the same time, which is always a combination for disaster.

He can be selfish though he doesn’t mean to; maybe it’s just a side effect of being an overgrown baby. He needs to cuddle when either of you sleeps over, or else he gets agitated and won’t stop whining until you slot yourself into his side.

Jungkook hogs the blanket. He forces you to go on 6AM runs with him. He thinks everything you own is also his by extension, but not vice versa. He constantly blasts music while you’re trying to study, and only turns it down a couple notches when you threaten to tell his mom about that time he was in middle school and broke one of her precious vases, but somehow managed to pin it on the dog.

Despite all that, Jungkook is very charming, effortlessly so. Ever since he had that growth spurt at 14, girls started flocking to his side and vying for his attention, and surprisingly, his previously quiet self morphed into someone more confident and outspoken.

Throughout high school and now halfway into university, Jungkook has become the person that guys wanted to be, and girls wanted to be with.

He looks as if Apollo had descended from the heavens and made himself home among mere mortals. With fluffy dark hair, sparkly Bambi eyes, a jawline that can cut glass, and a well-toned body underneath his oversized hoodies, he’s the textbook definition of “boyfriend material”. Wherever he goes, Jungkook just exudes that charisma that makes people stop and say, “Wow. That. I want that. Where do I get myself someone like that? Do they sell them on Amazon?”

He’s smart in that casual and infuriating way where he still manages to ace all his classes without ever really trying. All his professors adore him even though he’s almost always late to class and hands in his assignments at least a few days after the submission deadline without giving any kind of notice or excuse.

Jungkook seems like the total package—someone that mothers would love to call their son-in-law. (But, not everyone is privy to all his flaws like you are.)

And if all of that isn’t enough to knock the pants off of every wide-eyed college-aged girl, he’s a Fine Arts major who looks like he came straight out of a Pinterest moodboard, who wears a pair of those thin-rimmed glasses in class that always makes the TA just a little distracted. Who carries around a leather-bound journal wherever he goes like he’s a Shakespearean protagonist, just in case inspiration strikes and he needs a place for his sketches. It’s the journal that you saved up for three months to get him as a high school graduation gift, but also the very same one that everyone on campus daydreams about having a page dedicated to them in it.

There are, however, a couple of downsides to having godly looks and being the campus heartthrob.

You reckon this inconveniences you more than it does him. You can’t recall how many girls have come up to you for advice on how to approach him. Or how many love notes you’ve been asked to pass since ninth grade, only for him to skim and toss them.

(Jungkook doesn’t actually throw them away; he just never responds to any of them, thereby bestowing upon you the honor of watching smiles drop from eager lips when you regurgitate the same lines of “Sorry, he’s not looking to date right now” to his admirers.)

The attention gets to his head sometimes, but at least he’s never contracted the same asshole disease that guys get whenever someone throws a couple of looks their way.

You’re his messenger of heartbreak, as he once so annoyingly called it. It helps that he’s your best friend, and you make him treat you to a nice meal after each time. If it happens to be someone especially persistent who would constantly badger you unless you gave them his phone number, he would throw in five extra coffees for all your troubles.

What doesn’t make it easier, though, is the fact that you’re also one of those lovestruck girls whose hearts he breaks on a daily basis, but you’ll never let him in on that little secret.

You’ve known him nearly all your life, and you’ve been in love with him for half that time.

— all rights reserved © jeonqkooks. reposting, translating and/or modifying is not permitted by any means.

[silverstonesainz-archive]

1. or 15. from list C (hurt/comfort) with mat barzal ☺️

i did both. i hope you like it! – in honor of me moving all day today

❃゜・。. ・°゜✼ ゜°・ . 。・゜❃

warnings: descriptions of an anxiety attack, and just mat being a soft!bf

Moving has been one of the most tiring experiences of your life. You aren’t quite sure when you had accumulated so many clothes, or when the furniture got so heavy. But now you’re sitting in your new apartment, alone in the midst of the chaos of your belongings. This is supposed to be exciting. You wanted to be excited. But the stress of unpacking and organizing your new home outweighs any possible positive emotion. 

Your fingers shake as you type your boyfriend’s name, pulling him up his contact and calling him. The phone rings until his voicemail plays. His sweet voice plays on the other end, reminding you to leave a message and you burst into tears. You try again, air getting caught in your throat and your body beginning to shake.

“Hey y/n.”

“B-beau?” You stammer, confused by the voice on the line. 

“Yeah. Sorry Mat’s filming right now, saw you called twice so I figured it was important.” 

You nibble on your lower lip, “Oh. Uh…” You inhale deeply, “No uh. Just tell him to call me back when he can.”

“Are you alright?”

“Thanks Beau. Bye.”

You click the red button and lay your phone screen down on the floor. You curl up onto your side, eyes screwed shut as all your anxiety rushes out of you. You sob quietly, arms wrapping around yourself in an effort to ease your emotions. You try every tip your therapist has given you, but nothing seems to work. You cry harder, hands moving to cover your face. You were beyond overwhelmed, and suddenly you were unsure of every decision you’ve made to get to this point. You aren’t sure how long you laid there, or how long you were crying for. But when your tears were dried out, you move to lay on your back and try to regulate your breathing. 

The doorknob of your front door jiggles, and Mat walks in. His heart aches at the sight of you, looking so helpless. He slides onto the floor next to you, picking you up and resting your body between your legs. Instantaneously, your body melts into his touch. You bury your face into his chest and he kisses the top of your head.

“I came as soon as I heard. Beau said something was up.” He mumbles against the top of your head. “You okay bug?”

You shake your head, “I’m overwhelmed. I don’t know where to put myself. I don’t feel like I’m doing the right thing Maty.” 

His hand moves to your back, rubbing it softly. “Being overwhelmed is normal. But remember how excited you were to get this apartment? When you first looked at it. And when you first showed it to me?” He hums and looks at the empty space. He points towards the wall opposite you, “You said that you’d put the TV right here, with some potted plants that you insisted I buy for you.” 

You smile as he carries on, repeating all the plans you had for your new home and his own ideas as well. Soon, he has you giggling on the floor, your worries long forgotten. 

“Feelin’ better?” He asks, looking down at you. You nod, leaning up to kiss him sweetly.

“I don’t know what I’d do without you.” You hum, pecking his lips. “Thank you.”

“Anything for you. Now c’mon, let’s start unpacking these boxes.

The two of you manage to unpack and put together your kitchen and bedroom, deciding that the living room would just have to wait til the next day. Your space was looking more and more like home, and you can’t help the warmth in your chest grow as you watch Mat move comfortable in the area. 

It’s nearly midnight when you flop onto the rug by your bed, absolutely beat and muscles sore. The long day behind you has finally caught up, and you are now feeling the effects of pushing and lifting boxes. Mat walks into your room, and amused smirk on your face as he looks down at you.

“You have a bed silly.” 

“I know I’m just… I’m so tired I can barely move.” You whine. He laughs, shaking his head and reaches down to help you onto your feet.

“Shower first, then bed.”

“Shower together?” You raise your brown, letting Mat lead you to the bathroom.

He looks over his shoulder, winking. “Yeah… you know save water or something like that.”

❃゜・。. ・°゜✼ ゜°・ . 。・゜❃

come join the sleepover!

[beneathstarryskies]

I love your work!! It's so sexy and you always do such a great job! Could I please request Jiraiya NSFW alphabet? I love the way you write him :)

A = Aftercare (what they’re like after sex)

Jiraiya is very sweet with his aftercare, but there’s still always a hint of sensuality behind it. He’ll give you a massage, spending more time than necessary to rub your thighs. He’ll offer to take a bath with you and then clean your body gently, again taking extra care to “wash” your tits or thighs.

B = Body part (their favorite body part of theirs and also their partner’s)

Jiraiya is very confident in his body. He’s big and muscular. He knows that there are very few people who could stand in front of him and not feel tiny. But being someone who is absolutely obsessed with sex, he’s the most confident in his cock.

On his partner, it would be very hard for him to choose a favorite part because he’s gonna love so many things. It can literally change by the day. One day he’ll be obsessed with kissing and nipping at your thighs, and he’ll swear they’re his favorite thing in existence. The next day he has his head buried between your tits and he’ll think, “This is my favorite.” Then you’ll give him a bright smile and he’ll surprise even himself with how much he melts, and he decides that’s his favorite.

C = Cum (anything to do with cum, basically)

Jiraiya cums a lot, and usually, it’s very thick. He’s not very picky about where he empties his load, because to him it’s all a win. He does have a particular fondness for cumming deep inside of you. It’s the territorial side of him that wants to claim you.

Jiraiya loves making you cum and as many times as possible. His favorite thing to do is bury his face in your pussy and have you gushing all over his face so you’re whining and needy before he even fucks you. Once he’s inside of you, he tends to drag it out for a while before letting you cum again. He loves, loves, loves making you squirt.

D = Dirty secret (pretty self explanatory, a dirty secret of theirs)

Jiraiya really doesn’t keep dirty secrets. Especially not from you. Anything he’s curious about trying or any lewd fantasies, he’s pretty much just gonna bring it up to you.

E = Experience (how experienced are they? do they know what they’re doing?)

He quite literally wrote the book on sex. The man has loads of experience, and he knows exactly what to do to drive you wild.

F = Favorite position (this goes without saying)

The mating press is his favorite position because he can still kiss you and play with your tits while fucking you. 69 is easily his second favorite because it’s such a win-win position. He can have your pretty mouth around his cock and your pussy in his face at the same time.

G = Goofy (are they more serious in the moment? are they humorous? etc.)

Jiraiya can be a little silly and over the top with his flirtations sometimes, but that’s only because he’s so confident that he can get the job done. However, if the mood is more intimate he can be surprisingly romantic.

H = Hair (how well groomed are they? does the carpet match the drapes? etc.)

Jiraiya has a patch of soft, white hair leading to his slightly more coarse pubes. He keeps everything well-groomed, or even shaved if that’s what you would prefer. As said earlier, his cock is his favorite part of his body so he’s definitely going to keep everything looking nice.

I = Intimacy (how are they during the moment? the romantic aspect)

Jiraiya usually is more light-hearted and fun during sex. He’ll still manage to make you feel like you’re the only girl in the world, but he doesn’t let things get too serious. However, there are certainly times when things are more serious and he can adjust to that as well. He can be surprisingly romantic when he wants to be. Like when he comes home from a mission all beat up and he knows you were worried about him, he’ll make love to you sweetly while whispering how much you mean to him.

J = Jack off (masturbation headcanon)

Jiraiya really loves jacking off, and he does it regularly even if he can fuck you whenever he wants. He just enjoys it. He also likes engaging in mutual masturbation. For one it helps you both learn each other’s bodies, but he also loves watching you play with yourself while he strokes his cock.

K = Kink (one or more of their kinks)

Oh boy, Jiraiya definitely has a “try anything once” attitude towards sex. He’s accumulated quite a long list of kinks. Lingerie, daddy kink, breeding kink, voyeurism, light exhibitionism, toys, bondage, overstimulation, edging...The list really just goes on and on.

L = Location (favorite places to do the do)

Anywhere, anytime. He really doesn’t have a favorite place because wherever he can fuck you is his favorite place at that moment.

M = Motivation (what turns them on, gets them going)

It’s really not all that difficult to get Jiraiya turned on, honestly. Usually just saying something flirtatious is enough for him to be ready to fuck you. That being said, he does kind of like it when you tease him a bit or put on a little show for him.

One thing which will absolutely guarantee that he’ll fuck you for hours is if he sees someone flirting with you and you seem to be flirting back. Woo, you’re in for it. He’ll drag you home, and the more innocent you try to act the more he’s going to punish you. He’ll push you against the wall and have his thigh shoved between your legs, “You think anyone can fuck you better than I can?”

N = No (something they wouldn’t do, turn offs)

Jiraiya wouldn’t play around with anything that could seriously hurt you. Things like knifeplay would be a no go for him. Also no scat or pissplay.

O = Oral (preference in giving or receiving, skill, etc.)

There’s not really much of a preference. He enjoys giving and receiving equally. Being buried between your thighs and lapping at your slick is heaven. He would happily suffocate while going down on you.

Blow jobs are definitely one of his biggest weaknesses, and he likes it when you get sloppy. Few things turn him on more than seeing you drooling around his cock and practically choking as he hits the back of your throat.

P = Pace (are they fast and rough? slow and sensual? etc.)

Jiraiya can really adjust to whatever pace you want, and usually, the pace can change multiple times. He might start out slow, but then get rougher as he gets lost in the pleasure. Or if he’s been rough and you’re starting to get overstimulated he’ll slow down and kiss you softly to let you readjust.

Q = Quickie (their opinions on quickies, how often, etc.)

Jiraiya loves quickies, and will definitely partake as often as possible. His favorite thing is having quickies in a situation where you know someone could be coming back shortly. If Tsunade knew how many times the two of you had quickies in her office when she’s taken breaks from meetings, she would murder you both.

R = Risk (are they game to experiment? do they take risks? etc.)

Jiraiya loves to experiment and take risks. He’ll always make sure you’re comfortable with whatever is happening though.

S = Stamina (how many rounds can they go for? how long do they last?)

He can last a pretty long time and usually can go for at least a couple of rounds before needing to take a break. It’s not uncommon, especially when he’s just returned from a mission, to have days dedicated to sex/fooling around with short breaks between rounds.

T = Toys (do they own toys? do they use them? on a partner or themselves?)

Jiraiya loves taking you out to buy toys, and he’s pretty much open to anything being used on him as well.

U = Unfair (how much they like to tease)

Jiraiya loves teasing you, but he gives in pretty quickly. He might make it seem like he’s gonna give you a hard time. When you start begging he’ll coo, “Oh, is my little princess begging to get fucked?” but as soon as you look at him with wide eyes and say something like, “Need your cock so bad” he’s done with the teasing.

V = Volume (how loud they are, what sounds they make, etc.)

Jiraiya is very vocal and he has a filthy mouth. He loves talking dirty to you, especially when he says something that makes you blush (as though he doesn’t have his cock inside of you) it’s the sweetest thing. He also tends to make a lot of noise, and definitely growls when he cums.

W = Wild card (a random headcanon for the character)

Jiraiya is a giant pervert, this can not be disputed. However, his biggest desire is to be loved and appreciated. Sex is wonderful and he could fuck you endlessly. But deep down, his biggest turn-on is how much you love him. Intimacy is very important to him, and not just sexually. Little things like you cuddling against him while he writes or begging him to just stay curled up in bed with you a little longer in the morning are really the things he lives for.

X = X-ray (let’s see what’s going on under those clothes)

Jiraiya is big. Easily 10 inches and thick. His cock has a little curve to it, and the texture is heavenly. Very veiny.

Y = Yearning (how high is their sex drive?)

Jiraiya has a very high sex drive. He yearns for you all the time, and sometimes it does get in the way of other things. He just wants to fuck all the time.

Z = Zzz (how quickly they fall asleep afterwards)

He doesn’t really tend to fall asleep very quickly afterward, especially since for Jiraiya sex is not strictly a nighttime activity.