#so they have a tendency to get backed up when backups happen in Everywhere Fucking Else (could specify more but i dont wanna doxx myself :p

[indigo6f00ff]

funny update a couple of months later for People Who Want to Know: i dont have the car that got me into this Incredibly Minor Accident anymore. while after the accident, i did have to get the brakes serviced (wow, they were faulty, who knew!), it proceeded to have Several More Issues, such as: the transmission being fucked up and Trouble With Turns. i still drove it regardless because i needed that shit to get to college but eventually the radiator fan stopped working on it (where it would start overheating if the car wasn't moving (if the car was moving then air could still blow over the engine, cooling it down)) and My Mother deemed it too dangerous to drive. RIP to the shitty 2012 jeep liberty hand-me-down with 200k miles that led to the creation of the Kim Moment(TM).

need to share an experience i had 30 minutes ago

(edit: thanks to @walks-the-ages for providing and reminding me to put alt text, sorry it slips my mind alot lol)

[wildernessuntothemselves]

Noona, Do You Have a Boyfriend? | Part 1

Genre: Smut 

Word Count: 3.7k

Summary: You hate brats. Jisung is a brat. So why the fuck are you blowing him in a dirty bathroom in the middle of a concert? A/N: I hope this is better than the clusterfuck that was Born Sick. This is supposed to be a small series but knowing me, who the fuck can tell? 3racha don’t read this!

Warnings: femdom, sub!jisung, brat!jisung, dom!reader, dancer!au, dancer!reader, very mild dub-con, jisung doesn’t ask for permission before he does something and you should always ask for permission.

Part 2 Han Jisung is insufferable. The boy didn’t know how to take no for an answer. He was always bothering you, using any spare moment he had to hit on you or try to seduce you. He would do the craziest things to try to get your attention, ranging from dropping the cheesiest pick up lines on you to giving you what basically amounted to a lap dance. It’s not even that you didn’t find him attractive, he certainly was. He might not have the stunning good look of Hyunjin or Minho, but he possessed an abundance of charisma that just drew people to him. The only problem is that he knew that too well. As someone who thrived on praise and received it from everyone, everywhere, it was natural that he’d know how attractive he is and use it to his advantage, but it seriously got on your nerves how arrogant he could get sometimes. Guys who think they’re the shit are so off-putting to you—you’d take a well-behaved baby boy over a brat like Jisung any day. The only problem though was that Jisung is right, he really is irresistible, try as you might to deny it. He got away with displaying a multitude of opposite charms because he embodied them so carelessly. When he’d do aegyeo—puffing his cheeks out so he’d look even more like a cute squirrel—his awkwardness would make it endearing instead of cringey, and the stupid kissy faces he’d make at you would be almost too tempting to ignore. You wouldn’t guess it by looking at him, but Jisung could be real suave when he wanted to. He is shameless and he is cocky and that was a recipe for one very rude boy who would stop at nothing to seduce you. As a backup dancer for JYP, your job allowed him ample opportunity to get physical with you. You frequently had to stay late at the practice room with him in order to teach him dance moves that you knew he was messing up on purpose so he could get you alone and make his moves on you. Those late night dance sessions were filled with heated gazes, unnecessary lip bites, and overly sexual dance moves. Han Jisung is nothing but an undisciplined boy who doesn’t know how to take no for an answer. So why the hell did you think it was a good idea to blow him a bathroom right in the middle of a concert?

They boys were on a short break in between sets in which they could catch their breath and get seen to by the stylists in case they needed to get anything fixed. But as soon as they went off stage, Jisung ran off to the bathroom and locked himself in there. It was none of your business. As far as you were concerned, the more time he spends in there, the less time he has to bother you. Unfortunately for you though, Jisung’s ceaseless attempts to hit on you were known to most of the staff by this point and, after multiple unsuccessful attempts by other people to get the boy to come out of the bathroom, the head stylist asked —i.e. ordered—you to give it a try, hoping that Jisung would hurry up whatever he was doing in there and come out so he could bother you a little before the next set begins. You were totally against it, a man’s bathroom time is his own and even though he annoyed you endlessly, you didn’t want to embarrass him. But the woman was adamant and you couldn’t say no to a senior staff member so you, begrudgingly, accepted. Clearing your throat awkwardly, you knock on the door, and call out for him. “Noona! What are you doing back here?” Jisung answers in a panicked voice that immediately raises suspicion within you. You understand he could be embarrassed about taking too long in the bathroom, but his tone was less embarrassed and more freaked out.  “Siyeon-unnie asked me to come get you… what is taking you so long anyway?” “Nothing!” He answers too fast. Realizing how squeaky his voice sounded, he coughs and tries again, this time in an unnaturally deep voice, “Uh, nothing. I’m just… fixing my… hair.” You roll your eyes, “Oh, yes, because you don’t literally have an army of stylists whose entire job is to fix your hair for you. What is really going on, Han?” He’s silent for a long time, clearly hesitant to tell you which only piques your curiosity further. You hadn’t been interested before but now you certainly were, especially after what he says next. “If I tell you, you’ll beat my ass up.” “That’s very possible.” “Noona! That’s not funny.” “It is, but okay, I won’t hit you or whatever, just tell me what’s wrong.” You hear the sound of the door unlock before the round-cheeked boy sticks his head out to say, “Promise you won’t hit me.” You roll your eyes and mockingly hold your pinky finger up, “I promise.” As the door creaks open to reveal a bashful Jisung cupping his hands over his crotch, you could almost smack yourself for not realizing the problem sooner. Of course a horndog like Han would pop a boner right in the middle of a damn concert. He seriously is hopeless. “You promised you won’t hit me.” He quickly reminds you, probably seeing the annoyance on your face, and you sigh. “Han, we have no time for this. Just jerk off or something.” “You think I haven’t tried!” He exclaims in exasperation, “It won’t go away. It hurts, noona. I can’t—” And then something curious happens—Jisung whimpers—whimpers!—and his expression settles into one of pain and desperation. It was an entirely new look on him—a vulnerable, soft side that you’ve never see on him before and honestly? The rush of arousal that shoots down to your heat at seeing him like this almost makes you pass out. The Jisung you knew was always so cocky and bratty that you’re ashamed to admit that you’ve touched yourself to the thought of breaking him—making him so damn needy that he’d take anything you give him and say thank you. It was the ultimate guilty pleasure that you never intended to actually act upon. It was just an outlet for all the sexual frustration he put you through and all the your pent up sadistic impulses that you’re too afraid to indulge in. That’s why Jisung was so dangerous; he makes you want to wallow in those tendencies. He makes you want to tease and punish him, and tease and punish him, until he apologizes for everything and begs for mercy. So yeah, you try to avoid that at all costs. But could anyone really blame you for pushing him inside, locking the door behind you, and getting on your knees to give that hellboy the suck of his life when he finally acts just a little bit subservient? You think not. Maybe this will help you flush out your desire for him. You know, getting over something by letting yourself be consumed by it? That’s a thing that works, right? “Noona, what are you doing?” Jisung gasps when you reach out to pull his already unbuttoned pants down. “You want this to go away, right?” He stares at you dumbly as if his brain short-circuited and he couldn’t figure out what you meant and you sigh as if you didn’t fucking adore this new side of him. “Do you want me to suck you off, Han?” “Do I…” His mouth hangs open, making you worried that drool would start leaking out, before he snaps out of his dim-witted haze and stumbles to answer, “Holy shit, yeah. Fuck yeah!” You chuckle and lower his pants and boxers down, revealing the painfully hard member that was causing him this much trouble. As soon as you wrap your hand around it, he jolts and cries out. “Shh, be quiet or you’ll get us in trouble.” Despite your rebuke, you don’t hesitate to start a rapid pace with your hand on his cock, aided by the fact that he was slick and lubricated already. Boy must’ve been trying for a long time. To his credit, Jisung tries to listen, biting down on his lip to keep quiet, his moans coming out in muffled whimpers. He only lasts for a few seconds though, because when you flick your wrist, your palm sweeping over the leaking slit, he breaks right away, moaning out your name. You know, just in case whoever catches you won’t mistake your identity. Clearly, he was too wound up and horny to be expected to actually follow orders—not that he would’ve listened either way— so you quickly take him in your mouth, figuring that you’d get him off faster this way, hopefully before anyone catches you. But it wouldn’t be Jisung if he didn’t find another way to cause trouble for you, and when you start sucking him off, he not only moans super loudly but he starts talking too. “Shit, shit.” He groans, watching you with blown out pupils as you take more and more of his cock in your mouth. He was fucking living for this. “Ah, fuck, noona’s mouth feels so good around my cock." That little shit. Why did he have to sound so sexy saying that? No matter what, you can’t let him know how much this is affecting you—how his cock feels so good in your mouth too, all hot and hard and oh-so-very responsive. He was moaning and squirming at the tinniest brushes of your tongue, and leaking so much precum that you could literally taste the need on him without him needing to say it. “I’ve wanted this for so long. Why did you have to be such a tease, noona?” 

You grip the base of his cock just a little too tightly, and pull away to snap at him, “I’m not a tease. You’re just a brat. Now, shut up or I’ll stop.” “No, no, don’t stop. I’ll shut up. Just please put your mouth back on my cock.” He says, clearly not shutting up, and grabs the back of your head to push your face towards his crotch, thrusting his hips slightly to press the head of his cock against your lips, silently demanding to be let in. 

“I will if you don’t stop being a brat.” You threaten, using your tight fist to give him a rough jerk that is just on the painful side of pleasurable. Of course you wouldn’t actually leave him like this, you needed to see how he looks when he cums almost as much as he needed to cum. It would be great fodder for your nights of shameful masturbation at the thought of this boy. But he didn’t need to know that, and with the way the wet heat of your mouth is now wrapped just around the very tip of his dick, you don’t think he’ll be figuring it out soon. Instead, he asks you the stupidest question in the history of questions.  "Can I take a picture?” Your jaw almost dislocates from dropping so low. What the fuck is wrong with this boy? “I won't show it to anyone. I promise.” He quickly adds on, as if that might convince you. “Are you crazy or just stupid?” The frown on your face was so intense, you think it might actually scare the boy for once. Truth is, you find the fact that he wants to save this moment so he can get back to it later—just like you undoubtedly will—so sexy. It makes a new gush of arousal coat your already drenched underwear. But you would never let him do that because you’re not a dumb horny teenager, no matter how much Jisung is forcing you to reconnect with that long-forgotten side of you. But even as you glare at him, he presses on, “Please, I don’t know if I’ll ever get you like this again.” It’s only when you start to get up that he finally backtracks. “It’s just a polite request! I’ll stop asking. Please, don’t leave.” “No, you’ll stop talking.” Slipping off your underwear, you mentally congratulate yourself for choosing to wear a skirt today, and stuff the fabric in his mouth. You hoped that your makeshift gag would finally shut him up, but even through the fabric, you could heal his garbled voice saying, “That’s hot.” You sigh, getting back on your knees and taking him into your mouth right away. You start bopping your head up and down his length again. Jisung wasn’t big, but he was a bit thick and it made it a little hard to continue taking in more of his length when he reaches the back of your throat. But you keep going anyway, the thickness of his cock only adding to the pleasurably tight sensation for him. When you’ve fit his entire length inside, the head nestled snuggly down your throat, you swallow. It hurt, but it was worth it to feel the way he spasmed under you and cried out loudly even through the panties in his mouth. You don’t give him a break after that, alternating between licking up and down the underside of his cock and taking him down your throat and swallowing around him, all while your hands played with his balls and your fingers rubbed the sensitive patch of skin between them and his asshole. Your pace was fast and hard, making Jisung approach his high very rapidly. It was all going so well. He was so, so close and he was finally being nice and pliant for you, letting you do what you needed to do to get him off. But then someone knocks at the door, and a voice that you recognized to be Chan’s calls out for Jisung. You quickly yank the now drool-covered scarf from his mouth and gesture for him to answer, hoping beyond hope that the lust-dazed boy won’t give you both away. “Yes?” “What the hell are you doing in there?” Chan immediately pick up on the way Jisung’s scratchy voice trembles. “What’s going on? And where the hell did ___ go? She was supposed to fetch you—you know what? Never mind all that, It’s almost time to get back on stage so hurry the fuck up.” “I’m trying to!” Jisung whines, pouting down at you like this was all your fault. That brat! Narrowing your eyes at him, you press his cock against your mouth and sink down on his length in one go. He almost screams your name, but for once he had the good sense to bite down on his tongue as soon as the first letter came out.  “Seriously what are you doing in there?” Accusation was clear in Chan’s voice, and you realize it probably wasn’t helpful to try and push Jisung right now, no matter how much of a brat he was being. So you move to pull away but he stops you, his hands grabbing the back of your head and pushing your mouth all the way down his length again. “Shit,” He curses quietly, before calling out to Chan in a louder but clearly strained voice, “I’m almost done, man. Just go and I’ll come quickly.” You would roll your eyes at the double entendre but you were a little short on air right now. Before Chan’s receding footsteps can no longer be heard, Jisung tugs your head back, pulling his cock out of your mouth so far that you think he’s gonna let you breathe, but just when the tip is at the edge of your lips, he slams his hips forward again, stuffing his length fully down your throat and choking you with it. “You’re always so—ah—mean to m-me, noona.” He cries out, fucking your mouth none-too-gently. You would bite his dick off if his moans didn’t sound so damn delicious, so whiney and broken and high-pitched. You could sit him and let him use your mouth however he wanted for hours just so you could hear the sounds he made, but you were starting get dizzy. Not to mention that the little brat didn’t even ask for permission before he went ahead and made your face into his own person blow-up doll. So to get back at him and get some much needed air, you use your long nails to claw at his skin harshly, digging bright red trails down his thighs. You expect him to scream and try to get away but, to your surprise, he does the exact opposite; his hold on your hair gets even tighter, his fingers yanking the strands right at the root while he rams his cock in and out of your mouth. He only lasts a few more seconds before he cries out your name and empties himself in your mouth, but damn were they brutal on your poor throat. You’re gasping for air as soon as he pulls away, which—unfortunately for you—only makes you choke on his cum that was too much for you to swallow. So there you lie on the dirty bathroom floor, throat burning and hair stinging, gasping for breath through the tears, cum and saliva that were staining you face. “Holy shit, are you ok?” Jisung kneels down next to you, looking comical with his flaccid cock out and a dazed look on his face as he tries hard to concentrate, apologize and make sure you’re alright all at the same time. “I’m so sorry for being so rough… But also, that was so fucking hot.” He holds your head in his hands and uses his thumb swiping up some of the mess on your chin which he then presses to your lips, probably trying to get you to lick it off. You smack his hands away, furious. “You brat!” You hiss, your voice hoarse and gritty, something that Jisung apparently also finds ‘so fucking hot’ if the way he licks his lips and stares at you hungrily is any indication. He really was a horndog. “You don’t deserve my kindness. I should’ve let you go up on that stage hard and horny.” “I’m sorry, noona.” He cowers, pouting and trying to make himself look cute and small so you’d let him off the hook. “It just felt so good and I needed to cum fast before anyone caught us.” That still wasn’t enough of an excuse but you didn’t have the time to tear him a new one right now. You both needed to try and make yourself look presentable enough for the next set, which should be starting any minute now. “Whatever.” You dismiss, getting up to wash your face in the hopes that it will make you look less like someone who just had their face fucked by a horny teen. Jisung stand up too, but instead of fixing his own clothes, he just watches you. “What now?” You scowl at him through the mirror. For a millisecond, you think he looks a tiny bit embarrassed that you called him out. But then he opens his mouth… “So that’s still a no on the picture thing?” “Hey, you said no hitting!” He squeaks as you pinch his ear and drag him to the door, throwing him out. “You better fix yourself up quick because if someone finds out about this you’re dead.” •❅���─────✧❅✦❅✧──────❅•  The entire remainder of the concert, Jisung couldn’t keep the shit-eating grin off his face . He looked ten times cockier than ever and he threw suggestive looks at you every fucking chance he got. Every time he did something to make the fans scream, he’d turn to you, chest puffed and an arrogant smirk on his face, showing off. You wanted to slap him right there on stage. When the concert ended and you all went backstage, he heads straight to you, wearing  a lop-sided grin that is somehow made even more infernal by his squirrel teeth. “What did you think, noona? How was that for a first concert?” “It was great. You guys did so well.” Your tone, despite being cheerful, had an edge to it intended to let Jisung know that you weren’t in the mood for his shit right now. But as always, he completely disregards you. “Who cares about them? I’m asking about me.” Jisung quips, and god help him, you know he doesn’t actually mean that. He cares about his members immensely but the boy was just too dumb to think his words through before saying them. “Did you see me on stage? I think I gave the best performance of my life out there. One fan actually took off her bra and threw it at me.” “That’s great, Han.” You deadpan, willing the conversation to end. You were still so sticky from the ordeal in the bathroom and you couldn’t wait to go home and wash your fuck-up away.  But your fuck-up was incredibly tenacious. “Maybe I should bring her backstage.” He prattles on. “Uh-huh.” “But why go through all that trouble when you’re right here, noona?” He steps up to you, placing his hands on your waist and bending down to whisper in your ear, “Plus I owe today’s performance to you. It’s only fair that I return the favor.” You poke a finger at his chest and push him away in disgust. “Yeah, thanks but no thanks.” “Why not?” He pouts, stomping his foot. Rejection always had a way of making him revert to his more juvenile ways. “You’re not my type.” He snorts, “Oh yeah, and what’s that?” “A good boy who knows how to listen.” Jisung throws his head back, laughing, “You mean a boytoy who will let you do whatever you wanted to him. What’s the matter, noona? Scared of a little challenge? Are you worried that you might actually end up under me?” You look around to make sure no one was paying attention to you, then you lean in to whisper, your tone menacing, “No. I’m worried for you. Bad boy who don’t bend, will break.” “You can’t break me.” “Yeah? Maybe try to say it without shivering next time and I just might believe you.”  •❅──────✧❅✦❅✧──────❅•  A/N: As always, feedback is greatly appreciated.

[sunlightdances]

One Good Reason: (3/5) - Dean x Reader

Pairing: Dean Winchester x Female Reader Chapter Warnings: No major warnings, a shorter chapter this time as Dean and the Reader get used to living together. Also - something strange is happening at the bunker, and it’s not just Dean and the Reader pretending they’re not attracted to each other. Series Summary: Dean never brings women back to the bunker. It figures the one time he breaks his own rule, the state issues a lockdown. Navigating the next month is an exercise in trust, patience, and falling in love. Author’s Note: I don’t own Dean or Supernatural, but the plot and writing is mine, so please don’t repost it without my permission. Also: my new page divider is by the amazing @writeyourmindaway​!

Series Masterlist / Complete Masterlist

2.5 weeks later

You hiss as you get out of bed, the cool floor underneath you a shock first thing in the morning. You rifle through your suitcase, grabbing a hoodie and pulling it on, as well as a thick pair of socks. Yawning, you open your door and head down the hallway to the kitchen.

“Morning,” you say quietly to Dean, who’s already dressed at the table, a steaming cup of coffee in front of him. You narrow your eyes at him. Who looks that good first thing in the morning? His shirtsleeves are rolled up on his forearms, the veins there distracting you.

“Hi,” he says back, meeting your eyes briefly. It’s always like this - the two of you a little shy during the first conversation of the day. “Did you sleep okay?”

“Yeah,” you say, sighing, “I kept hearing noises. Were you and Sam up late?”

Dean looks up curiously. “I mean, we were up later than you.” He frowns, “Didn’t mean to keep you up.”

You start to get stuff together for your coffee, and scowl when you realize the almond milk you like is empty. And back in the fridge.

“It’s fine,” you tell him absently. You roll your eyes to yourself as you grab the now empty milk carton out of the fridge and set it on the counter with the rest of the empties waiting to be recycled - two empty boxes of cereal, and half a dozen beer bottles.

“Is it too much to ask for someone to not put an empty carton of milk in the fridge?”

Dean glances up from his laptop. He and Sam have been working on something for a few days, but he hasn’t mentioned details, and you haven’t asked.

“Don’t look at me,” he replies, “You and Sam are the only ones who drink that crap.” He makes a face at the carton of almond milk.

You sigh, and add the carton to the pile. “We have to go to the store again.”

“See, you say we, but you mean me.”

You smile sweetly, tilting your head. “But Dean. Think about how much you want to drive your car. Might as well run an errand, right?”

You can tell he’s trying not to smile. “You’re trouble.”

You hum, trying to figure out what else you’re going to have for breakfast now that milk is out of the question.

“Lactose intolerant?” He asks, going back to typing.

“Oh, not sure, actually. Just like the taste better.”

He hums. You stare at him for a bit, trying to figure him out. Dean is so mysterious, but still makes himself open, makes you feel comfortable and safe. It’s such a strange feeling. Still, you will not let his or his brother’s good looks make you forget why you’re a little irritated this morning.

Living with men is…. Hard. They’re constantly leaving messes everywhere (even though Dean has tendencies to clean everything when he’s bored) and the volume at which they play video games together…. Astronomical.

Your point is proven a few hours later when you’re on a call with your work team and even though you’re muted so they can’t hear Sam or Dean, you can’t hear a thing being said to you. “Can you guys excuse me just one minute?” You ask apologetically, and then take your headset off, storming down the hall.

You burst through the door and they barely even glance at you. Fuming, you walk right in front of the TV and stand there, arms crossed as they sputter.

“Hey! You make a better door than you do a window, you know.” Dean says, leaning to see around you.

“You are children.” You huff, blowing the hair that has escaped your ponytail out of your face. “I am on a work call. It’s important, and I can’t hear anything.”

Sam looks a little sheepish. “We thought with the door closed--”

“We can’t be that loud.” Dean interrupts.

You look at him like he’s grown another head. “All I’m asking is for a half hour of quiet. That’s it. I’m begging you.” You say, trying to turn on the charm. “Dean?”

He grumbles under his breath, but you can see the fight leaving him. “A half hour?”

“Maybe less,” you reason with him.

“Fine.”

You manage to finish your work call without any other disruptions, but by the time you’re finished, Sam and Dean are watching the news and you’re slipping into a worse and worse mood.

You’re more homesick than you’ve ever been. The weight of all of it is too much, and you excuse yourself from the room before you can burst into tears.

You hate this - you hate the whole state of the world and you hate that it’s forced you into the most awkward situation of your life, all because you couldn’t resist a pretty pair of eyes and a sense of humor.

You find your way to your room and curl in a ball on your bed, the unfamiliar texture of the blanket under you making your heart clench.

You start a YouTube video on your laptop, some mindless cooking videos that play on a loop until you manage to fall into a restless sleep.

.

.

.

Dean approaches your door hesitantly. He has no idea what he should do - if he should leave you alone, or try to apologize. Though if he’s honest, he’s not even sure what he should apologize for.

He’s just got a general guilty feeling coursing through his body. It’s his fault you’re stuck here, after all.

He notices the door isn’t shut all the way, so he pushes it open gently. The room is dark except from the light coming from your computer, and you’re curled in a ball on top of the covers.

Dean finds that he can’t stop staring at you, and wills himself to stop standing there like a creep. He pulls a throw blanket off the end of the bed and covers you with it, reaching over to push your laptop closed.

His mind has been flashing back to that first night with you, trying to understand what made you so different. He’s liked having you around, even if he won’t admit it to anyone who asks. He still feels that connection he felt the first night, but he has no idea what you’re thinking, and he doesn't want to push or pressure you, especially when you can’t leave even if you wanted to.

Leaving the room, he finds Sam and Cas in the kitchen. Cas has an armful of groceries.

“You better wipe those down,” Dean says, and Cas rolls his eyes.

“I can’t get sick, Dean.” He says it like he’s talking to a child.

“And what are you going to tell her when she wakes up?” He asks, gesturing towards the hall where you’re sleeping. “We don’t have any backup plan if things get weird.”

As if on cue, the lights above them flicker. Just once, but enough that the three of them freeze, eyes suddenly sharp.

“You’re kidding me.” Sam says.

A flutter of wings, and Cas is gone.

“What the fuck?” Dean asks, and Sam shrugs.

“Went to check it out? He’ll be back.”

“He can’t keep flying off. He’s going to slip up one of these days and appear in front of her and she’s going to pass out.”

Sam snickers. “You’re awfully protective.”

Dean ignores him, but he can’t deny it either. He feels it in his gut, to make sure you don’t find out the truth about him and Sam, and to make sure you feel comfortable while you’re here. Maybe it’s his innate need to take care of people, but the small voice in the back of his mind that he rarely listens to tells him it’s something else.

The lights flicker again, and Dean moves to the doorway, sighing. “We better figure this out, and soon.”

“You think it’s possible she brought something here with her?”

Dean stops, because he never even considered it. He just figured it was his own bad luck that while he’s trying to conceal who he really is from a girl he maybe sort of likes, a ghost would start haunting the bunker. Maybe it was Charlie here to finally give him the ass kicking he deserves for getting a girl like you stuck in this mess.

“I have no idea.”

Suddenly there are footsteps, and Dean shushes Sam before he can reply. You come into view a minute later, rubbing your fingers through your hair, and Dean finds he wants to do it for you. He shakes it off.

“Problems with the electrical in this place?” You ask.

Sam makes a choked noise that has you looking at him in alarm. “Uh-- yeah.” He recovers, “It’s an old place. You know.”

“Uh huh.” You look back at Dean for confirmation, and he shrugs.

“Slept okay?” He asks, changing the subject completely before he can put his foot in his mouth.

You nod. “Needed a nap.”

Dean looks a little closer and thinks he can see dried tear tracks on your cheeks. It has him reacting automatically, taking a step closer, but he sees you shrink back and he stops immediately, snapping back into awareness of what he’s doing.

“I’m going to take a shower,” you mumble, and then you’re gone, leaving Dean staring at his shoes, clenching his jaw and trying to figure out how you’re all get through a month more of this.

Cas appears back in the kitchen, and Dean glares.

“You have to stop doing that.”

“I think there’s a spirit in the bunker.” Cas says, ignoring Dean’s warning.

Sam groans, head tipping backwards. “Great. Good. Couldn’t be better timing.”

Dean puts his hands on his hips, sighing. “Look, tonight we’ll hunt it. Just-- we’ll wait until she’s asleep and hope it heads to the opposite end of the bunker.” He turns to Cas, “And you. Walk. You have to walk.”

Cas rolls his eyes, and Dean truly wonders if he’s going to make it through quarantine without killing his best friend or his brother, and if he can keep them all and you from being murdered by a vengeful spirit.

[ifonly4mynallas]

NIGHTMARES: PART 5 w/@BellaRAhgony

Bella: *I woke up from my nap with Nalla with a start. Nalla was snoring lightly beside me hugging her baby dragon Rhage had given her concentrating on her face as if she was trying really hard to grow.

I wiped the sweat from my brow and realized that these nightmares were getting out of control. Zsadist was worried about me. I he needed all his concentration out on the field. I’d never forgive myself if I ever became a distraction for him causing him to be hurt.

I picked up my phone and texted Mary to see if she wanted to have some coffee or hot chocolate with me in the library. It was time to talk to someone about these dreams. @IfOnly4MyNallas

Zsadist: Wrath had allowed me to cut back on my hours, but that didn’t mean that I didn’t have things to do. Tonight, I was on rotation, but I had nothing scheduled for after that, no training of, or driving the trainees home, no one-on-one sessions, and no sparring with any of the other males of the manse. Tonight I would actually be able to come home after fighting, put my young to bed, and see my shellan before she fell asleep. This was going to be a first in a very long time.

I took care in strapping on my gear. It was something I did almost every night, but I was methodical about it. Mary has said that my OCD tendencies spark from all the past trauma in my life. Now, my brain wants to control anything it can, right down to where and how all my weapons are strapped onto my body. A slight smile crossed my features as I thought about all that Mary had helped me with, over the years. She made me realize why I did a lot of the things I did, and it made me come to grips with who I was and who I wanted to be. She made me face things I didn’t want to, and head on. It took a while, but I was in such a better place now, then I had been for over two centuries. Well, recently I had been having some issues, but I was still better off than I had been a decade ago. I could only hope that once Bella spoke to Mary, Mary could do the same for her. I knew it was going to be an uphill battle, and it wouldn’t happen overnight, but if anyone could help Bella with what she was going through, it would be Mary.

Bella: *It was almost time for Last Meal by the time Mary and I were done talking. We spent hours in the library talking about those weeks I had been kidnapped those many years ago. Mary went down the hall and stairs and straight into the kitchen. She apparently wanted to see if could get away with baking cookies for Rhage before Fritz catches her.

I shook my head and the image of my head of Fritz keeping track of Mary will preparing the rest of Last Meal. For such an older doggen, he could still multitask like a young vampire. I head towards the playroom where Beth was watching the kids and see if Nalla needed to change clothing before Last Meal.

Walking into the playroom, I witness Nalla just as she flicked some blue paint at LW with Beth laughing at their antics. My head fell back in laughter as I pulled my phone out to take a picture. Nalla was covered in all sorts of colors. “Mama!!” she yells with a big grin. “How beautiful, baby.” I commented as she proudly showed me her artwork. Beth hands me a towel I could wrap around her so I wouldn't get paint on myself and we said our quick see you laters as we retreated to our suites to get the kids cleaned up for dinner.

As I gave Nalla a bath, I thought about Mary’s suggestion to perhaps start training with the trainees. At least in self defense. She thought that if I could defend myself that I would feel more powerful and more confident. Then perhaps in my dreams a different outcome would manifest. Nalla was singing and playing with the bubbles as my mind wondered about how Z would react.*

Zsadist: It had been one of the craziest nights I had experienced in a while. I had been paired with Phury and it was as if we had walked into a hive of lessers. We barely had time to call for backup before the action got rough. There were about twelve of them, and the two of us. Thankfully, Phury and I knew how to work as a team. We may not have been raised together, and may have lived a lifetime apart, but we were twins to our marrow. He zigged and I zagged. We were Yin and Yang when it came down to fighting. I was lean and fast. He had strength and power. Together we were virtually unstoppable. But, twelve were just a couple too many for the two of us to handle. We were warriors, we weren’t stupid. We knew when to call for backup and tonight was that night.

JM and Q were the two that showed up in an instant. As much of a hothead as Q was, I respected him. He was almost as scrappy as I used to be. And, JM was the one that saw the fight as a whole and plotted it out before he jumped in. Between the four of us, we had the situation under control in about 15 minutes.

It’s amazing how fast things can happen. A battle that seems almost insurmountable can be won in the blink of an eye. Yet, when it comes to battles of another nature, like the mind, they can take years, sometimes decades to barely gain a footing.

At the end of the fight, Phury called for Butch to run cleanup. As soon as Butch’s feet touched the ground, I was gone, dematted back to the manse. I could do my debrief tomorrow. Tonight, I was going to see my shellan and my young to bed.

*****

It took me all of ten minutes to scrub the lesser blood off my body down in the training center. I never took this shit to my quarters. I kept anything to do with the lessers as far away from my family as possible. It was kinda like church and state. There was work and there was life. It wasn’t so long ago that my life was encapsulated by fighting. Now, I had my life with Bella and Nalla. If it weren’t for them…

I quickly tossed my soiled clothes into the laundry room, on the way by, and raced up two sets of stairs to my bed chambers. As I slowly opened the door and walked in, I called out, “Bella?”

Bella: *I was still lost in my thoughts as Nalla said “Papa” and I realized that Zsadist had returned home. Relief washed through me as I could her his baritone voice echoed into the bathroom.* In here! *I responded as I finished rinsing Nalla’s hair from the shampoo as she continued to play with some bath toys. Z walked in and his beautiful citron eyes focused on me and he kissed my neck on both sides before giving me a kiss. Then he pulled a towel from the rack and opened it up for Nalla to snuggle in and dry off. I smiled as Nalla giggled as she shook her hair making all the water goes everywhere. Z teasingly scold her for the mess but smiles. I picked up another towel to dry off her hair as we both starting drying her off together and getting her ready for bed.

We had a routine, after a bath and brushing her teeth, Z and her laid in our mating bed to read a book until she fell asleep and he carried her to her nursery. I watched for a bit as I got myself for bed. I could hear their voices together, him reading and her babbling in baby talk with a few words here and there. Zsadist had come a long way since she was born and I’m forever grateful to the Virgin Scribe that our family was whole and healthy.

I wondered how to broach the subject that Mary had suggested. I wasn’t sure if Zsadist would take it as thought he could not protect me. Of course he could. Mary’s thought was that perhaps it would build my courage and confidence in myself. It was about me and my nightmares and what I needed to get rid of them.*

Zsadist: I can’t even tell you how good it felt to be able to do all this again. On nights that I actually made it home from work early enough to see my young to bed, this had been our routine. However, those nights had been few and far between for quite some time, so to be able to lie back, in my mated bed, and read to Nalla as she fought to stay awake, was like what I expect walking into The Fade must be like, pure fucking heaven. She cooed and babbled on, as if to respond to what I was reading, and every time I thought she was asleep, her eyes would pop back open and she would start all over. She didn’t realize that this wasn’t one of those rare nights that she would see her sire before bed. She had no way of knowing that tomorrow would be the same, and the night after that, and the night after that. She would take some time to get into this new routine.

Finally, after two books, both read twice, she finally knocked out hard. So, I quietly put the books down on the bedside table and slid my arms under her tiny frame. For a second, I thought she might wake up again, but she didn’t. She just rolled over in my arms, slinging one around my neck and started snoring again.

Gently, I walked her into the adjoining nursery and laid her down in her crib. I stole a few minutes to watch her sleep before heading back into Bella and my part of the suite.

“She’s out.” I let Bella know before walking over and wrapping my arms around her waist and kissing her neck from behind. “So, how was your day, my Nalla?”

Bella: *I was just finishing up brushing my teeth when Zsadist came up behind me. I turned my head to kiss him sweetly as we greeted each other.* It was … productive.

Mary spent some time talking today. *I waited to see if he would respond. He stayed quiet as waited for me to continue. I turned around in his arms so I could look up at him and fully gage his reactions.*

She feels that perhaps the nightmares stem from my insecurities. Everyone has been so busy lately so it’s just been Nalla and me mostly. So we’re by ourselves most nights while your out in the field. *I shrugged, I didn’t want to make him feel guilty about doing his job. The Brothers were out there protecting the race … savings lives. They saved mine not too long ago. So I fully understood the importance of what he did each not personally.

I had no idea how Zsadist would take what she suggested next. I never wanted him to feel that he wasn’t enough to protect me or Nalla. I took a deep breath and quickly told him what we discussed.*

She thought perhaps I need to train in self defense. Learn how to protect myself.

Zsadist: Once she turned, I leaned in and began to kiss down Bella’s neck as she spoke. I loved the way her head would ever-so-slightly lean toward me when I did that. I don’t know if she was even aware of it, but it was just one of those endearing things. However, when she mentioned being home alone all the time, I pulled back. This was something I was working on. I had already gone to Wrath about it, I had cut back on my hours, I was here now, and I planned on being here most every night from here on out. Was this a guilt trip? I know I haven’t been around, I’ve made a point to correct that. Is she upset that it took her nightmares to make me realize. Well, maybe so, but she also could’ve mentioned them to me. She could have spoken up long before. She didn’t have to suffer through all the nights she did and not told me there was a problem.

I knew that my thoughts were flying off the handle, but I already felt guilty enough. It was bearing down on everything and wearing my patience thin. I took a deep breath as I waited for the other shoe to drop. I had no idea what it would be, but I was expecting some long, drawn out night of this to escalate into, “You just haven’t taken my feelings into consideration, lately.” or maybe, “What about your young? Doesn’t she matter to you, at all.” I certainly wasn’t expecting what did come out of her mouth.

Instinctively, images of another Brother’s arms wrapped around Bella, as she tried to get herself free of him, flashed across my mind and I began to see red, pacing the tiled, bathroom floor like a caged tiger. There was no way in fuck this was going to happen! Absolutely, fucking, not!

Then memories of my conversations with Mary creeped in. Talk about trusting in oneself. I had the utmost respect for that woman, and if this was what she was recommending… Shit! I stopped and scrubbed my face with my hands. If this was what Bella needed, I needed to stand behind her...but, the training she would be doing would be with Payne, or Xhex, or even with the other female trainees. She would not be training with any of the males. I loved most of my brothers, but they were not laying a finger on my shellan! “Nalla, if that is going to be what makes you feel comfortable, better, and stops these nightmares from happening, then I’m good with it. But, I will have conditions.”

Bella: *I looked up at him and watch his expression stay tight and all emotion gone unless you paid attention. His citron eyes giving him away. Imperceptible. Barely. If his eyes had been midnight black … you could only see darkness at the surface. You had to look deeply.

I could see curiosity, anger, guilt? He seemed relieved. Which was odd. Not an expression that I was expecting. Anger. Disappointment in me maybe. As I looked into his citron eyes all I could see was concern now.* Conditions? Wait, you’re not angry? Or offended?

*I was pleased that he knew that I never doubted his ability with protecting me. I knew he would lay his life for me. Mary and I spoke about my fears about his doubts. Zsadist and I have come a long way since we came into each other's lives. I thought back at those weeks I spent in this very manse after being rescued. I had felt so guilty that I could stop from being near him when I knew he didn’t want anything intimate with me. My need to feed … I could still feel my surprise with finding him scrubbing his wrists raw … cleansing himself of unseen contamination.

My memories were jarred from the past and back into the present, as Z’s voice penetrated through my woolgathering.*

Zsadist: Angry? Offended? More like anger and guilt… at the fact that as much as I wanted to be, I couldn’t be by hers or Nalla’s side 24/7. There would be times in their lives when it was going to be up someone else to put their lives in front of my Nallas. That thought gutted me to the core. It was my responsibility to keep them safe from any kind of harm, however, it was also my duty to keep the race safe. I couldn’t do both, 100% of the time. So, as much as it did anger me, and yeah, maybe it offended me in some small part, I understood why this subject had come up.

The other thing was, after all my years of treatment with Mary, I had to remind myself that none of this was about me. This was all about Bella and her sense of security, and as much as I would like to be the knight in shining armor in her dreams, she has to be that for herself. I wanted her to be that for herself. I wanted her to feel that no matter what, she had the ability to stand on her own two feet.

Reaching back out and pulling her close again, I looked into her eyes. “Nalla, as much as I want you to trust that I will always be there to put myself in harms way to keep you safe, I know that in all actuality, I can’t be there, with you 24/7.” I pulled back just a tad, “That kills me, by the way!” Offering up a soft smile, I continued, “Also, after all my time with Mary, I understand that this isn’t about me. It has nothing to do with me. This is all about you, you and your ability to trust in yourself. I know that in here...” I put one palm on her chest, right above her heart, “is a warrior’s heart, and if you doing a little bit of training is what you need to believe that truth, then I’m all for it.”

Bella: *I knew this would be hard for Z. I can also understand it may get harder for him. Especially after my first bruise … I remembered what it was like for the boys at the beginning with they were pre-trans and after. It made me happy though to see them now. I guess I needed to talk to Xhex and Payne about seeing if they could make some time for me in their schedule. Cause sure as Dhund … none of the Brothers would ever consider it.*

Are you sure? Are you ready to possible see bruises on me? *Dame watching those eyes go from citron to obsidian in a blink of an eye was something else.* Baby, you know it will happen when I start sparring. I have to engage to learn. *I said slowly as I watched the blackness slowly disappear into the yellow I love after a few moments of contemplation.* Just know that it just means that I’m growing stronger … hopefully. Unless you want to teach me? *I asked knowing that he would no doubt refuse. He would never be able to strike me. I could however see him instructing me with the punching bag or something.*

Zsadist: At the mention of bruises, every single muscle in my body went rigid and fire sparked in my soul. The very thought that my Nalla was going to be marred in any way, shape, or form made me think twice about my compliance in the whole idea. How was I going to lie next to my shellan every single night, seeing these wounds all over her body, and just be okay with it? How was I going to handle her flinching at my touch? A low rumble radiated from my gut at the thought. Then I saw the look in her eyes. She needed this so fucking much. How could I say, “No?”

Taking a deep breath, I closed my eyes to process everything that was running through my mind. I was going to have to make peace with this. Then she dropped the next bomb.

Me teach her?! Was she fucking mad?! I took a step back, held up my arms, and shook my head once. “Absolutely not! And don’t think of asking any of my Brothers. Training will be with Xhex, or better yet, Payne. You probably shouldn’t work with any of the female trainees. Most of them don’t know how to fight their way out of a wet paper bag yet, and you’d only get hurt.” I took a step back in and put my finger to Bella’s chin, “Can we agree on Xhex or Payne?”

Bella: *Smiles as I predicted his reaction correctly.* I was thinking of you teaching me techniques like a punching bag or something, Z. *Shakes my head knowing he would never be able to hit me in any form.*

But yes, I can agree with Xhex or Payne. I’m sure they both wouldn’t mind. *After a few moments of further contemplation his eyes finally returned to the beautiful citron. I knew it would be difficult for him to see me hurt in any way. I remembered once when he wouldn’t even let me dematerialize when I was pregnant before I was unable to. A bonded male always protects their mate regardless sometimes of the ridiculousness. I smile and give him a kiss.*

Try not to worry baby, ok? And let’s avoid watching any of my training sessions, shall we? *I suppressed an internal cringe at the thought of him watching me spar with Xhex or Payne. I highly doubt that he would ever strike a female but one was a symphath with her own set of hidden assets and the other was half deity also with her own special gifts.*

Zsadist: Leaning in, I returned her gentle kiss. I wasn’t sure how I was going to handle all this. Saying I was okay with it and being okay with it was going to be two entirely different things. Right now, I could spit out the words. Living through it all was going to be next to impossible, though.

Throwing my head back, I let out a hefty groan. “Me, watch? Seriously?” There was no way in Dhund I was going to step foot in that gym while anyone was putting their hands on my shellan. Someone might end up hurt. The only female I ever dreamed of doing harm to was my mistress. However, I couldn’t promise that my instincts wouldn’t take over were I to witness any harm coming to Bella. I think I might just see red and lose all sense. “Bella, no need to worry about that. I won’t even be stepping foot downstairs on nights you are training.”

Reaching an arm around Bella’s waist, I pick her up and carry her off to our bed. “Now, less talk … “ I suggest as I drop her on the bed and lean in to indulge in my female.

#Nightmares #PartFive #SaintsNSinners #BDB  #SASBDB

[oftacyeons-blog]

helloooo !! it’s ping, aka i play rex as well !! HERE is my new character, finally, yoon taeyeon !!! if u would like 2 meet her, please cont under the line !!

i will try to squeeze in as much as i can in the briefest way possible so i can properly start writing her bio !! keep in mind this intro is gonna SUCK fhisudhf 

she was adopted at two years old and was given the surname smith before she changed it back to yoon years later

her adoptive father is a retired municipal deputy who inspired her to pursue a career in criminal justice. he taught her everything she knows about justice, and especially everything she knows about injustice. 

her older brother, who was the only child the couple was able to conceive before adopting her six years after his birth, committed a crime that resulted in an innocent girl's death when taeyeon was twenty two and fresh out of university.

he was found not guilty by the court, however a couple of months after taeyeon found out the truth when she overheard a conversation in between her brother and her uncle where they confirmed the crime, and admitted they were still doing fucked up shit, taeyeon framed both of them for a different crime they didn't commit and they both got sentenced to fifteen years in prison.

she had a huge falling out with her family, especially with her dad. during the trail, he tried to force her into lying on her brother's behalf so he'd walk out a free man. her image of him completely shattered, and even though she felt guilty for framing them, she wasn't going to let them get away with what they did and it hurt her incredibly to see her father turning his back on justice and on her for the sake of her brother.

after everything happened, she changed her surname to yoon, her birth name, despite never having met her birth parents and not having a clue onto who they were. she didn't identify with anything anymore, and instead decided to build herself back up without a family's backup.

completely on her own, she became a cop and has been one for the past four years now. she lived in columbus before being transferred to the police department here in pickaway creek.

it had been steadily building up but what finally made the higher ups make the decision to transfer her was after she was stabbed in an alleyway trying to arrest a guy involved in a robbery case that she totally went undercover for when she wasn’t supposed to. later, the guy who stabbed her tried to sue her for aggravated assault, and when the defense attorney said the guy "allegedly" stabbed her at court, she stood up and took her dress off to reveal the injury and basically went OFF.

she also has a general problem of obeying the rules and goes off on her own, getting herself into really dangerous situations, so they decided that the best thing for her was to get out of the big city for a while and calm the heck down in a small, tranquil town. 

SO that's her backstory summed up very briefly, now time for little facts and personality traits! also summed up very briefly.............

that can't-stay-still cop

will do anything for justice

always gets her way

the most cynical

trust issues

married to her job

self-defense goddess

the end justifies the means

very private

allergic to good advice

neglects emotional needs

biggest realist

not one romantic bone in her

very impatient

tendency to jump in head-first

thinks she's always working (aka always carries her badge and tries to arrest people everywhere)

worst cook in the universe

doesn't really have any hobbies aside from shooting guns and mma

has a knife collection

doesn't deal well with failure

has had two (2) serious relationships in her life

relationship one (1): the guy thought he could control her and he became abusive though she totally beat the crap out of him when he got physical 

relationship two (2): longest one, he broke it off because she was way too into her job and he just wanted a lil quiet family life

bisexual

not very into drinking and partying but doesn't always abstain

not good at intimate relationships or being intimate at all

terrible at apologies, 0/10

rides a motorcycle and is always seen wearing a leather jacket

also wears those faux leather fingerless gloves when she rides bc she's That dramatic

owns two cute lil' rescued pitbulls, 10/10 would die for them

easily angered and will not hold back

you'd think that after getting stabbed she'd want to live a little more carefully but she just became aNGRIER

is working up to be a detective, always trying to do everyone else's jobs

hates small talk, terrible at it

thinks everything and everyone is suspicious

WAY !!

TOO !!

INTENSE !!

ABOUT !!

HER !!

JOB !!

WELL there it was, this terrible lil intro that i hope at least gave u an idea about her !! if u’d like to plot, hmu !!!