#so they didn’t need to follow their destiny
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The Time Blades Sang Karaoke With Optimus Prime
"Oh oh oh, and have I ever told you about the time Optimus and I sang karaoke?" Why no Blades. You did not. Allow me to tell everyone for you. So- That's all this one-shot is! More fun with Blades, Ratchet, and Orion!
"C'mon Ratch! Sing with me!" Blades tugged on Ratchet's arm. The ATV had picked up a whining tone that had quickly started to get on Ratchet's nerves. "No. I'm not singing." "But it would be funnnnn," Blades hung off his roommate's arm. Ratchet pried Blades's servo off and let the smaller bot fall to the floor. "Go find someone else to pester," Ratchet stepped over Blades's frame. "But Jazz is busy DJ-ing and nobody else wants to sing with me!" Blades whined as he pulled himself off the floor. The bot looked miserable. "Pleeeease?" Blades widened his optics and gave a small pout, trying to look cute. Cute had never worked on Ratchet before and neither were under the impression it would start now. Ratchet sidestepped his rather pathetic looking roommate and swiped a cube of high-grade before returning to the party. Blades sighed and slumped to the floor once again. Ratchet was usually more open to partying with Blades, but the taller medic wasn't up to Blades's type of fun. Probably off talking to- Blades shot up from the ground. "ORION PAX!" Blades popped his wheels out of his pedes and darted into the party. He found the blue and red archivist downing a cube of high-grade, as expected. Most everything Blades knew about the mech, outside of these parties, was through Ratchet. That is to say, Blades didn't know Orion very well at all. Good thing you didn't need to know someone to drag them into karaoke. Blades grabbed Orion by the arm and dragged him up to Jazz, who was in charge of all the music. (It did not occur to Blades that Orion so easily followed because Blades, much like Ratchet, was white and orange. And Orion was overcharged as per usual.) "Jazz! Orion and I would like to sing-" "Shut Up and Dance!" Orion had a wide grin on his face. "Got it! The mics are all yours!" Whatever high energy song Jazz had been playing transitioned into a familiar beat that had Blades more than excited. Surprisingly, it was Orion's voice that started tham off. The archivist was tapping his pede to the beat, his optics bright from overcharge. "Don't you dare look back, just keep your eyes on me. I said you're holding back she said shut up and dance with me," Blades watched Orion at the mic, not yet having joined him. The ATV let out a shaky vent and adjusted his hold on the mic. "This woman is my destiny she said-" "Oo ooo~ Shut up and dance with me!" Blades joined in, singing the lyrics with all his spark. "We were victims of the night, the chemical, physical kryponite! Helpless to the bass and the fading light, oh~ we were bound to get together! Bound to get together!" Singing together was so fun! Ratchet didn’t join Blades enough. He really ought to remedy that.
--
Ratchet watched as his closest friends danced and sang together. The song was catchy, a pop tune he was sure he had heard before. It was also likely Orion's choice, as the mech was the one to start singing first. The medic took a small sip of his cube. Hopefully, this would prevent Blades from asking karaoke from him too often. Ratchet had no place in the center of attention. And neither did Blades, outside of these parties.
--
Blades needed to get Ratchet on this stage next. This was so much more fun than usual! Orion had wound the mic cord around his leg, somehow managing not to trip over it. Blades twirled his cord like a ribbon. It was as elegant as it was an uncoordinated, overcharged dance.
--
Back in the audience, a young enforcer was snickering into his cube. Streetwise loved these shindigs. Good high-grade, good entertainment, and if the way Orion was already struggling with his mic cord was anything to go by, something funny too.
--
Blades hadn't actually considered how dangerous the mic cords were. He still twirled his like it was an extension of himself. He should consider adding a winch to his frame. But the winch could wait for another time. He'd say a time after karaoke but- It was like slow motion, the cord just a bit tighter, Orion, who made the wrong step, and then- CRASH! Orion was sprawled out on the floor, still rather happy, but a bit bruised up. Blades let out a squeak and hurried to help up his fallen friend. Both of them were laughing, as were most others who bore witness to Orion's blunder. Ratchet was absolutely cackling, he had likely seen this coming.
--
"Ratch? You up for karaoke?" Blades asked, though there wasn't any party this time. There was a mischievous twinkle in his optics Ratchet set his datapads down with a soft thunk. There was no way that Blades would be getting Ratchet to join him any time soon. "You can return these." The taller medic left the room without another word. "Wait! Ratchet!! I'm sorry!" Blades scrambled after his roommate. Ratchet laughed to himself as Blades chased after him. With luck, Blades adopted Orion as his new karaoke partner.
#one shot#transformers#transformers prime#rescue bots#rescue bots blades#ratchet#orion pax#i love how any time we see orion#its through the blades's optics#and because blades only saw him at parties#his views of the archivist are extremely skewed#its hilarious#oh almost forgot#blades+hisroommate#< an official tag for this series!#gotta go add it to the others as well
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I'm curious, who named the sparklings? Did Alpha Trion named them all or Sentinel named some of them?
Alpha wanted sentinel to name them but after everything, alpha gave them names in the dark and damp cave they resided in
Names that gave him hope
#PrimesSparklingsAU#d-16 and b-127 were given those names Cus they were born with serial codes#d-16 on his bottom(lol) and b-127 on his arm#I made it so that if you were born with a serial number you were meant to be a worker bot#luckily these two were born to a prime#so they didn’t need to follow their destiny#they will be able to name themselves in the future
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“Occasionally I’ll have a beer after work and break out the sketchbook. But I had wanted to be this great painter. I wanted to do these grand things: big, huge oil paintings. But those days of painting all the time were such a roller coaster. There were these periods of extreme depression, followed by manic states of trying to put myself out there. I couldn’t do it anymore. I mainly felt sorry for my dad. I know it was rough for him. My mom hadn’t wanted me to go to art school. She wanted me to do something more practical, but my dad said: ‘No. This is what he wants to do, and I want to support his dream.’ And then I abandoned it. That was the first time I had to deal with real failure. A lot of times when you’re an artist, it’s your job, it’s your lifestyle, it’s your entire fucking identity. It wasn’t like I failed to do a thing. It was like: I failed to be something, you know? It was a failure to live up to what I thought was my destiny. But then on the other side of that, there was this figuring out that there was nothing wrong with me the entire time. I didn’t need to be something else to have meaningful friendships, or a good relationship. I didn’t need to be something else to be loved and cared about. After work tonight I’m going to meet up with a person who’s in love with me, and I can’t wait. And that person met me long after I gave up on being a full-time artist. They met me when I wasn’t even a chef yet. I was a piss-poor, part-time line cook. But even then, they decided I was worth it. So you know, there’s something there. There’s something there that’s enough.”
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"Did the love affair maim you too?" | Part ii
Joel Miller xf!reader
part one | next part
chapter summary: After getting back his memories, Joel and you slipped away again.
word count: 15,3k (yes, it's longer than the first chapter)
warnings: angst, perhaps fluff, mentions of death, mentions of blood, and more angst, you will find out why Joel is mean in this chapter. I know I'm a teacher, but I didn't proofread, so I apologize for any mistake. paragraphs in italics indicate flashbacks.
a/n: Hello! The awaited part 2 of this story is here! I want to say thank you for the amount of love the previous part received, it was so nice to see all your reactions to this one! It was also my first fic reaching 1k> in less than a week and was overwhelming (positively). THIS IS NOT THE LAST PART, so stay tuned for the next! Reblogs and comments are always appreciated! happy reading and PLEASE tell me what you think. 💌
dividers by @/saradika-graphics
For a mere second of time, wanting was enough for you. In a harsh reality where a tender love couldn’t be part of the writing pages of a tragedy that had changed the plans destiny had for humanity, even a simple glimpse of a spark was enough to initiate the fire.
Finding a reason to wake up was enough. Joel was enough for you, even when it was a path with not a clear ending.
A lie.
A maim affair engulfed in fire burning your lungs.
A tragedy.
You looked up from your work as you sensed people entering at the place, your eyes meeting Joel’s for the first time. His expression was hard, his eyes narrowed as he sized you up. He didn’t say anything at first, just watched you with a guarded look that made you feel like you were being evaluated.
“Can I help you?” you asked, trying to keep your voice steady under his intense gaze.
“She needs that looked at,” he said, his tone brusque as he gestured to Ellie’s arm.
You nodded, motioning for Ellie to sit down. As you began to clean the wound, you could feel Joel’s eyes on you, watching your every move. It was as if he was waiting for you to make a mistake, to prove that you didn’t belong there.
“So, you’re infamous nurse” Joel said after a moment, his voice still cool and distant.
You looked up from your work, meeting Joel’s eyes briefly before returning your focus to Ellie’s wound. His words hung in the air, a subtle challenge beneath the surface.
“Infamous?” you repeated, trying to keep your tone neutral. “I didn’t know I had a reputation.”
Joel shrugged, leaning against the wall with his arms crossed, his gaze never leaving you. “Small town. People talk.”
You nodded, understanding that this was as much about sizing you up as it was about Ellie’s injury. You’d heard about Joel—everyone in Jackson had. He was a protector, a survivor, and not someone who trusted easily.
“I’m just here to help,” you said, keeping your voice steady as you wrapped Ellie’s arm with a bandage. “That’s all.”
Ellie, sensing the tension, glanced between the two of you, her eyes wide. “She’s okay, Joel,” she said, trying to ease the atmosphere. “It’s just a scratch.”
Joel didn’t respond to Ellie; his focus remained on you. There was something in his eyes—a guardedness, a wariness that told you he was waiting for you to prove yourself, or perhaps waiting for you to slip up.
“I’ve been in Jackson for a few days” you continued, finishing up with Ellie’s bandage. “Just trying to do my part.”
“Everyone’s got a part to play,” Joel said, his tone still clipped. “Just make sure you know yours.”
You felt the sting of his words but didn’t let it show. Instead, you nodded, stepping back as Ellie hopped off the table.
“Thanks,” Ellie said, giving you a small smile.
“You’re welcome,” you replied, managing a smile in return.
Joel pushed off the wall, his eyes still on you as he motioned for Ellie to follow him. “Let’s go,” he said, his voice softening slightly when he spoke to her.
As they walked towards the door, Joel paused for a brief moment, his hand resting on the doorknob. He turned back, his eyes meeting yours once more. There was something in his gaze, something more than just suspicion. It was as if he was searching for something in you, trying to read who you really were beneath the surface.
For a second, the hardened lines of his face softened, but just as quickly, the guarded expression returned. Without another word, he turned away and led Ellie out of the infirmary, the door closing behind them with a quiet thud.
You felt like breathing again.
By the moment you had reached your house, the sun had barely risen, casting a pale light over the quiet settlement. A few people were starting their duties as you walked with dried tears on your face, just wanting not to be perceive and being able to take a shower and follow your routine as you always used to die it since your arrival, but the ache was bigger than your wiliness and you ended up lying in bed, staring blankly at the ceiling, the horror on Joel’s face kept replaying in your mind. The heartbreak was raw and overwhelming, making it hard to breathe, let alone face the day.
You didn’t even notice you had fallen sleep until a knock came at your door, it took a moment for you to register the sound. You dragged yourself out of bed, wiping at your newly fresh tears from your eyes and trying to compose yourself as best as you could.
Opening the door, you found Maria standing there, her expression concerned. “Hey,” she said softly, her eyes scanning your face. “Ramirez told me you didn’t show up at the infirmary this morning. Thought I’d check on you.”
You forced a weak smile, stepping aside to let her in. “Thanks, Maria. I just... fell asleep”
Maria nodded, stepping into the room and closing the door behind her. She glanced around, taking in the disarray before turning back to you. “You don’t look like you’ve slept much.”
“I had a pretty good sleep” you said, voice breaking at how you so could still picturing Joel’s eyes looking at you with adoration last night “But morning came” you said, voice breaking “Joel got his memory back.”
Maria's eyes widened with concern and understanding. She moved closer, gently placing a hand on your arm. "Oh, honey, I'm so sorry.”
You nodded, tears welling up in your eyes again. "He doesn't remember loving me, Maria. He thinks I took advantage of him. He hates me."
Maria's expression softened, and she pulled you into a comforting hug. "I can't imagine how painful that must be for you. But you didn't take advantage of him. You both shared something real, even if he doesn't remember it now."
You clung to her, "I don't know what to do. I feel so lost right now."
Maria pulled back slightly, looking into your eyes. "Take it one step at a time. Give yourself permission to feel what you're feeling. And remember, you have people here who care about you. You don't have to go through this alone."
You nodded, trying to find some comfort in her words. "Thanks, Maria. I just... I don't know how to face him now."
Maria squeezed your hand reassuringly. "You don't have to figure it all out today. Take some time for yourself. Maybe stay away from the infirmary for a today? give yourself a break."
You sighed, feeling lost. "Yeah, maybe that's a good idea."
Maria smiled softly. "We'll figure this out together, okay? You're stronger than you think, and you have a lot of people who care about you."
You managed a small smile. "Thanks.”
She nodded, giving you another comforting squeeze before standing up. "I'll check in on you later, alright? And if you need anything, don't hesitate to ask."
As she left, you felt a small sense of humiliation, as if what had just happened was just a small piece of gossip to feed a community.
You stare at the wall for a minute, getting your stuff together. If you could get over what happened before arriving to Jackson, you could follow your life. That’s what you were making yourself believe.
So, you changed into new clothes, placing Joel’s shirt under your bed to not having sight of it again. And with a deep breath you left your house, walking to de infirmary to get your job done.
A broken heart wasn’t really a big issue in an already broken world.
As you walked to the infirmary, the weight of the morning's events lingered in your chest. The usual bustle of the settlement seemed distant, like a muted backdrop to your internal turmoil. Every step felt heavy, but you kept moving, determined to focus on your responsibilities and find some semblance of normalcy.
Upon arriving at the infirmary, you were greeted by the familiar soft hum of activity. People glanced at you with curiosity, but no one asked any questions. You were grateful for their unspoken understanding, and you quickly immersed yourself in your tasks, finding solace in the routine.
Hours passed in a blur of tending to some Jackson residents, organizing supplies, and ensuring everything was in order. The work kept your mind occupied, though it couldn't completely drown out the ache in your heart.
As the afternoon sun cast long shadows across the room, you felt a tap on your shoulder. Turning around, you saw Maria standing there, her expression gentle yet firm.
"Hey," she said, her voice soft but steady. "How are you holding up?"
You managed a small, tired smile. "I'm getting by. Staying busy helps."
Maria nodded, understanding in her eyes. "I'm glad you're here. I just wanted to check in and see if you needed anything."
You shook your head. "I don’t want to talk. It’s over” you said, avoiding her gaze.
She placed a reassuring hand on your arm. "I know you said you don't want to talk, but I'm here if you change your mind," she said softly. "Sometimes it helps to just let it out."
You looked at her, the pain still fresh in your eyes. "Thanks, Maria. Maybe... maybe later. I just need some time now."
She nodded, respecting your need for space. "Take all the time you need. Just remember, we're here for you."
You closed your eyes, taking a deep breath, a bit of rage simmered.
“You all were the ones who told me to go for it. You told me Joel was in love for me and him recovering his memory wouldn’t break what was there, but this morning he treated me like a whore and broke my heart.”
Maria's eyes filled with sympathy and regret. "I know, and I'm so sorry for what you're going through. We all believed it would be different. Joel... he's complicated. The things he's been through have left deep scars. But that doesn't excuse how he treated you."
You took a shaky breath, the pain still fresh and raw. "I just don't understand how it could change so quickly. One moment, we were so happy, and the next... he hates me."
Maria reached out, placing a comforting hand on your arm. "Joel's been through a lot, and sometimes people lash out when they're scared or confused. But that doesn't make it any easier for you. You deserve better than that."
You nodded, tears welling up again. "I just wanted to be happy. I thought we could be happy together."
Maria's grip tightened slightly, a gesture of support. "You will be happy again. It might not feel like it now, but you will. You're strong, and you have people who care about you. We'll get through this together."
Maria gave your arm one last reassuring squeeze before stepping back. You watched her leave, feeling of sorrow. The pain was still there, but you knew it would take time, but you also knew you wouldn't have to face it alone.
Later that evening, the emotional turmoil still roiling within you, you decided to head to the bar. You hoped the familiar atmosphere and a drink might help numb the pain, even if just for a little while. As you pushed open the door, the hum of conversations and the clinking of glasses filled the air, a stark contrast to the quiet despair you felt inside.
You made your way to the bar, trying to avoid looking around too much, but it was impossible not to notice Joel sitting at a table in the corner. His arm was wrapped around Lori, and they were laughing together, looking every bit like a happy couple. The sight hit you like a punch to the gut, the wound from the morning’s confrontation ripping open all over again.
Taking a deep breath, you walked up to the bar and ordered a drink, trying to keep your hands from shaking as you waited, Rick, the bartender, sensing your mood offered a small smile.
“What’s wrong with your face, darling?” he asked, concerned on his eyes.
You graced him with a small, tired smile at the question. “Just a rough day,” you replied, your voice barely above a whisper.
He nodded understandingly, setting your drink in front of you. “Well, here’s something to help take the edge off. If you need anything, just let me know.”
“Thanks,” you said, taking a sip of the drink. The warmth of the alcohol spread through you, momentarily dulling the pain.
As you sat there, trying to lose yourself in the comforting anonymity of the bar, you couldn’t help but glance back at Joel and Lori. Their laughter and closeness were a stark contrast to the emptiness you felt. You turned away quickly, not wanting to see any more.
“Is it Joel?” Rick asked gently, his voice cutting through your thoughts.
You nodded, not trusting yourself to speak without breaking down.
He sighed sympathetically, shaking his head. “Love can be a real mess sometimes.”
You chuckled bitterly. “Yeah, tell me about it.”
The bartender gave you a knowing look. “It’ll get better, you know. It might not seem like it now, but time has a way of healing these things.”
You took another sip of your drink, hoping he was right. “I hope so.”
“If you need anything, just ask me, okay?” he said, smiling at you before going back to his task.
You took another sip of your drink, hoping he was right. “I hope so.”
You nodded, trying to muster a smile in return. As the Rick moved away, you felt the weight of the day pressing down on you again. Lost in thought, you barely noticed the person sitting next to you until you felt their presence.
Turning slightly, you saw Joel, his expression unreadable. Your heart skipped a beat, a mix of emotions surging through you, all the pain, anger, and a lingering trace of love.
Perhaps he was here to apologize.
Joel cleared his throat, looking almost as uncomfortable as you felt. “Hey,” he said softly, his voice carrying a hint of uncertainty.
You stared at him, trying to gauge his intentions. “Hey,” you replied, your voice strained.
Joel shifted in his seat, glancing at the drink in front of you. “I didn’t expect to see you here.”
You shrugged, not trusting yourself to say much more. The sight of him so close, the contrast memories of his tender touch last night and the harsh words from the morning still fresh, made it hard to breathe.
He took a deep breath, his eyes finally meeting yours. “Look, about this morning…I was asking myself if I should let my door open tonight for you to come in the lure or something?”
The laugh he made after that cracked your already broken heart. The sound was harsh, cruel, and it cut through you like a knife. Your eyes widened in disbelief, and you felt your entire body tense.
“You think this is funny?” you asked, your voice barely above a whisper, trembling with hurt and anger. “You think what happened between us is something to joke about?”
Joel’s laughter died on his lips as he saw the hurt and anger in your eyes. “I- “
“What did you mean? you interrupted, your voice rising despite your efforts to keep it steady. “Because it sure as hell feels like you’re entertaining yourself by making jokes right now.”
Joel's face twisted into a bitter expression. “What do you expect me to say? That I suddenly remember everything and I'm head over heels for you? Life doesn't work that way, princess”
Your heart sank further, the cruelty of his words stinging more than you wanted “You don’t have to be cruel to be funny, Joel. You could at least try to understand what I’m going through.”
He leaned back, crossing his arms defensively. “Understand what? That you’re upset because you tried to rewrite a history that doesn’t exist between us? I’m sorry, but I can’t change how I feel—or don’t feel.”
You shook your head, feeling an anger bubbling within you. “You don’t get it.” You said, simply. Taking a seat on the stool, again.
Joel’s expression hardened. “You’re too busy living in a fantasy to see that whatever you think happened between us is over. I don’t remember it, and I don’t care to. Move on.”
You looked at him, fighting the tears. “I will move on from you. You’re not that important.” You looked towards the direction he had come from, not breaking the façade. You immediately spotted Lori who seemed amused at Joels treating you badly. “Go back to your woman, Miller”
Joel’s jaw tightened at your words, and he leaned in closer, his voice low and laced with anger. “You know what? I will. At least she knows where we stand. Unlike you, clinging to some fantasy that never existed.”
Your vision blurred with anger and hurt as you stared at him. “You really think you’re better than me.”
He smirked, a cruel glint in his eyes. “I’m done with your drama.”
The words hit you like a slap, and before you could stop yourself, you balled your hand into a fist and swung at him. The punch landed squarely on his jaw, causing him to stagger back, a look of shock and pain flashing across his face.
The bar fell silent as everyone turned to witness the commotion. Joel touched his jaw, his eyes narrowing as he looked at you, anger and something else—something more vulnerable—flickering in his gaze.
“Don’t you ever talk to me like that again” you spat, your voice trembling with the intensity of your emotions. “You are the worst mistake I’ve done here.”
Joel's eyes blazed with a mix of anger and shock, but he didn’t say anything. You could see his jaw clenching, and the vulnerability in his eyes vanished, replaced by a cold, hardened look. The silence in the bar was deafening, every eye on you.
You didn’t wait for his response. You turned on your heel and marched towards the door, your heart pounding in your chest. The weight of your emotions threatened to overwhelm you, but you refused to let Joel see you break down.
As you pushed the door open, the cool night air hit your face, offering a small respite from the intensity of the bar. You took a deep breath, trying to steady yourself, but the tears you had been holding back finally spilled over. You wiped them away angrily, not wanting to show any more weakness.
As you stormed out into the night, the tears mingling with the cool air, you heard the door swing open behind you. Heavy footsteps quickly followed, and you knew who it was before you even turned around.
"Hey," Tommy called out, his voice filled with concern. "Wait up."
You spun around to face him, your anger and hurt bubbling over. "What do you want, Tommy?" you snapped, your voice trembling with emotion. "Did you come to see the fallout of your brother's words?"
Tommy stopped a few feet away, his hands raised in a placating gesture. "I came to check on you," he said softly. "I saw what happened in there. Are you okay?"
You laughed bitterly, the sound harsh and broken. "Do I look okay to you, Tommy? Your brother just ripped my dignity there?”
Tommy's eyes were filled with sympathy. "I know Joel can be a real asshole sometimes. But he's just confused. This whole memory thing has messed with his head."
You shook your head, the tears streaming down your face. "No, Tommy. This isn't his memory. He doesn't care about me. He never did. He never will”
Tommy took a step closer, his expression pained. "That's not true. I know my brother, and I know he cared about you. He's just scared. He doesn't know how to handle this."
You scoffed, the anger boiling over. “Care about me?” you laughed. “He was just dumfounded. What you saw inside is the real him.”
Tommy's face twisted with concern, his eyes pleading for you to understand. “Look, I know it seems like that right now, but Joel’s been through a lot. This memory thing has him all messed up.”
You shook your head, your voice trembling. “No, Tommy. You didn’t hear the things he said. He thinks I took advantage of him. He doesn’t remember any of the good times, any of the moments we shared. He just sees me as some... some opportunist.”
Tommy sighed deeply, rubbing the back of his neck. “I don’t know what to say. Joel’s always been stubborn, and this whole situation is making it worse. But you’re not alone in this. We all care about you.”
“Caring about me doesn't fix what he did," you said, your voice breaking. "He treated me like I was nothing.”
“I get it. I really do,” Tommy replied, his voice softening. “Just... give it time. Maybe things will get clearer.”
“Time won’t change what he said. It won’t change how he made me feel,” you replied, the bitterness in your voice evident.
Tommy opened his mouth to speak but then closed it, realizing there were no words that could ease your pain. He took a step back, giving you space. “I’m here if you need me. Just remember that.”
“I don’t need the baby miller protecting me.” You spoke. “From now on, I’m just the nurse and if you need me patrolling, I don’t want Joel near me.”
Tommy's face fell slightly, but he nodded, understanding the gravity of your words. "Alright. I'll make sure to arrange things so you don't have to cross paths with him."
You could see the concern in his eyes, but you didn't have the energy to address it. "Thank you," you said, your voice hollow. "I need to be alone now."
Tommy hesitated for a moment, then gave a small nod. "Take care of yourself, alright?" He turned and walked back towards the bar, leaving you standing alone in the quiet night.
As you watched him go, you felt a mixture of relief and sadness. The night air was cool against your skin, a stark contrast to the turmoil inside you. You wrapped your arms around yourself, trying to find some semblance of comfort.
Turning away from the bar, you started walking, not sure where you were heading but knowing you needed to move. Each step felt heavy, but you forced yourself to keep going. You would find a way to heal, even if it felt impossible right now.
One step at a time, you told yourself again. One step at a time.
Week one.
You had promised yourself to not having. And Joel had had started to have punctuating headaches.
When he arrived, he noticed another guy standing where you used to be. The unfamiliar face caught him off guard, and a sense of unease settled in his stomach.
"Where's the nurse?" Joel asked, trying to keep his voice steady.
The new guy, a young man with sandy hair and a nervous demeanor, looked up from his preparations. "She asked to be reassigned. Said she didn't want to do patrols anymore."
Joel's heart sank. "Did she say why?"
Before the guy could answer, Tommy walked over, overhearing the conversation. "I'll take it from here," Tommy said, looking at the new guy, who nodded and walked away.
Joel turned to Tommy, his expression a mix of confusion and worry. "What's going on, Tommy? Why'd she ask to be reassigned?"
Tommy sighed, crossing his arms. "She didn't want to be around you, Joel.”
Joel felt a pang of guilt and frustration. "I didn't mean for things to get this bad. I was just... I was trying to deal with everything, I think I handled it wrong."
Tommy nodded. "Yeah, you did. And now she’s moving on as you asked her to.”
Joel's chest tightened at Tommy's words. "I didn't think she'd actually was…I- I thought she’d... I don’t know, understand.”
"Understand what, Joel?" Tommy asked, his tone sharper than usual. "That you were scared and hurt, so you took it out on her? You made your bed, now you’ve gotta lie in it."
Joel ran a hand through his hair, feeling the weight of his mistakes. “Okay what’s so wrong? Since when she is in love with me?”
“Did you know she was the one who brought you back here when you feel and hit your head so hard you forgot about her? Or about all this past year?” Tommy said exasperated, “She was there for you every single day and man, she was scared of letting you in because she knew all this was going to happen.”
Joel's mind reeled as Tommy's words sank in. "She brought me back?" he echoed, a wave of guilt washing over him.
"Yeah," Tommy said, his voice heavy with frustration. "She did everything for you. Every single day. And you just pushed her away like she meant nothing."
Joel felt his heart constrict. He had been so consumed by his own confusion and pain that he hadn’t stopped to consider what she had gone through. "I didn't know. I didn't remember."
"That’s the point, Joel. You didn't remember, and instead of trying to understand, you lashed out at her."
Joel nodded slowly, trying to absorb the pieces of new information.
"You can't just fix this with a few words, Joel.” Tommy added, as if he had just read his brother’s mine. “She had gone through much already.”
“What do you mean by that?” Joel asked, concern came from nowhere.
Tommy sighed deeply, looking away for a moment before meeting Joel's gaze again. "She went through hell before she even got here, Joel.”
Tommy’s words hung in the air, heavy with the weight of unspoken pain. Joel's brow furrowed as he tried to grasp what his brother was saying.
"What do you mean?" Joel asked, his voice low and hesitant, the concern now unmistakable.
Tommy looked at him for a long moment, as if debating whether to reveal something he wasn’t sure Joel was ready to hear. Finally, he sighed, his expression softening with a mix of empathy and frustration.
"She was on her own for a long time before she found Jackson," Tommy began, his tone measured. "Lost her family, everyone she ever cared about. Saw things that would break most people. But she survived. She made it here, and despite everything, she decided to stay and help us. She didn’t have to, but she did. And when you came back hurt and lost, she put everything into helping you, even though she knew it was a risk."
Joel felt a lump forming in his throat as Tommy spoke. He had been so wrapped up in his own struggles that he hadn’t seen the depth of what she had endured.
"And you," Tommy continued, his voice thick with emotion, "you were her last straw, Joel. She let her guard down for you, and you crushed her.
Joel’s heart ached at Tommy’s words. He felt the sting of regret deep in his chest, knowing that he had only added to her pain.
"Tommy, I..." Joel started, but the words failed him. What could he say that would make any of this right?
"You need to understand something, Joel," Tommy said, his voice firm but not unkind. "She’s not just some woman who’s here to patch us up and send us on our way. She’s a survivor, just like us. And she deserves a hell of a lot better than what you gave her."
Joel nodded, feeling the full weight of his actions pressing down on him. He realized now just how much he had taken for granted, how much he had failed to see.
That same afternoon, the weight of his guilt and determination pressing heavily on his chest, Joel made his way to the infirmary. He had rehearsed what he would say a hundred times in his head, but the closer he got, the more uncertain he felt. He needed to talk to you, to apologize, to start making things right.
When he arrived, he hesitated at the door, taking a deep breath before pushing it open. The familiar smell of antiseptic and the soft hum of activity greeted him as he stepped inside.
You were at the far end of the room, organizing supplies and preparing to leave for the day. Your back was turned to him, and for a moment, he just stood there, unsure of how to start. But then you sensed his presence and turned around, your eyes meeting his.
For a brief second, something flickered in your gaze—recognition, maybe even surprise—but it was quickly replaced by a cold, distant expression.
"Hey," Joel said, his voice sounding more tentative than he intended.
You didn’t respond right away. Instead, you continued with what you were doing, organizing a stack of medical supplies. It was clear you were trying to keep busy, to avoid engaging with him.
"Can we talk?" Joel asked, taking a cautious step closer.
You paused, your hands stilling for a moment before you turned to face him fully. Your expression was unreadable, your eyes guarded. "I'm busy, Joel," you said, your tone clipped and distant.
Joel felt a pang in his chest at your coldness, but he knew he deserved it. "I know. I just... I wanted to apologize. For everything. I know I hurt you, and I’m sorry."
You looked at him for a long moment, your expression hard. "I don’t need your apologies," you replied, your voice steady but laced with an edge of bitterness. "What’s done is done."
Joel swallowed, feeling the sting of your words. "I understand that, but I still want to make things right. I want to try."
You shook your head, a small, bitter smile tugging at the corner of your lips. "You can’t just fix this with a few words, Joel. You made it clear how you felt. I was so pathetic for seeking tender love in a world like this, and I was so pathetic for accepting it from you."
Joel flinched at your words, the harsh truth of them cutting deep. He opened his mouth to respond, to say something—anything—that might reach you, but you were already moving past him, grabbing your coat and heading for the door.
"Wait," he said, reaching out to stop you, but you brushed past him without a second glance.
"I’m done with this conversation, Joel," you said over your shoulder, your voice cold and final. "If you have something to say, save it for someone who cares or maybe for when you fuck Lori.”
For a long moment, he didn’t move, his heart pounding in his chest as he replayed the conversation in his head. The way you looked at him—so detached, so unlike the sweet person you were—shattered any remaining hope he had of mending things between you. Joel clenched his fists frustration welling up inside him.
And with that, you were gone, leaving Joel standing in the infirmary, the empty room echoing with the silence of everything left unsaid.
Week two.
The distance between you and Joel grew even wider. You kept yourself busy with your duties at the infirmary, throwing yourself into work to avoid thinking about him. Jackson was large enough that it wasn’t hard to avoid each other, especially since you made a point to steer clear of any places where you might run into him.
Joel, on the other hand, wasn’t faring as well. The days felt like they were dragging on, each one heavier than the last. The guilt and the lingering regret of how things had ended between you, was starting to take a toll on him. He found it harder to concentrate on anything, his mind constantly wandering back to you, replaying your last conversation over and over again.
Things hadn’t started bad between the both of you. There was a time, not too long ago, when things between you and Joel had been different—better. When you first arrived in Jackson. He was wary, of course, just as everyone. People with big walls up for protecting the same from the dangers from the outside.
Initially, he had kept his distance, observing you with a cautious eye. But as days turned into weeks, something shifted. You’d taken on the role of a nurse with a quiet determination, and your compassion and dedication gradually began to break through the walls Joel had built around himself.
There was one particular evening when you both found yourselves at a small community gathering. It was one of those special moments for people to unwind and reconnect. Joel, usually reserved and gruff, had shown up with Ellie in tow, and you were surprised to find him engaging in casual conversation, a rare sight indeed.
You and Joel had ended up chatting while sitting around a makeshift bonfire. The conversation had started with practical matters—how best to handle a certain type of injury or a recommendation for new supplies—but soon it evolved into more personal topics. Joel had shared stories from his past life, and you found yourself opening up about your own one.
The old versions of two people trapped in the endless tragedy
The atmosphere was relaxed, and for the first time, you saw a different side of Joel.
Joel was seated across from you, a relaxed look on his face that you rarely saw. His eyes, usually so guarded, were softer tonight. Ellie was nearby, occupied with a makeshift game she’d crafted from scavenged materials.
“So, you actually went through all that trouble for a single, mediocre meal?” you asked, chuckling at Joel’s tale of a particularly botched cooking attempt.
Joel grinned, a rare and genuine smile that lit up his face. “You’d be surprised what we went through to get even a half-decent meal back then. We were pretty desperate.”
You laughed, shaking your head. “I can’t imagine. I’m just grateful for what we’ve got now, even if it’s not gourmet.”
Joel nodded in agreement. “Yeah, things are better here. A lot better than they were.”
There was a comfortable silence between you, punctuated only by the crackling of the fire. You glanced at Joel, noticing how his eyes softened as he spoke. “I’m glad you’re here. It’s nice to have someone who understands what it’s like out there.”
Joel met your gaze, his expression sincere. “And I’m glad you’re here too. You’ve done a lot for everyone. For Ellie, especially.”
For Joel, dealing with all of this started to become unbearable the moment migraines hit. They had started as a dull ache, a constant pressure in his head that he could push through if he focused hard enough. But as the days went on, the pain intensified, becoming sharp and unrelenting. The pounding in his skull would come in waves, leaving him dizzy and disoriented. He tried to hide it at first, not wanting anyone to see him weak, but it wasn’t long before people began to notice.
He’d find himself gripping the edges of tables or leaning against walls to steady himself, his vision blurring as the pain surged through him. He hadn’t had migraines like this in years, not since the early days when the world had first gone to hell. But these were different, more intense, and he couldn’t shake the feeling that they were somehow connected to something else.
Maybe someone, his thoughts screamed.
Tommy noticed too, of course. He had been keeping a close eye on his brother ever since the confrontation in the infirmary, and it didn’t take long for him to realize that something was wrong.
Joel had just returned from patrol; his face pale and his movements unsteady. As he walked through the door of the house, he winced, his hand pressing against his temple. The migraine had hit him hard, and he was struggling to keep it together.
Tommy was already in the kitchen, grabbing a drink when he noticed Joel’s distress. He set the cup down, crossing the room quickly. “You okay, Joel?” he asked, his voice laced with concern.
Joel tried to force a casual shrug, but the pain in his head made it difficult. “Yeah, just—” He hesitated, trying to find a plausible excuse. “—just got a bit of a headache. My new patrol partner’s been causing me more stress than usual. You know how it is.”
Tommy raised an eyebrow, skeptical. “Your new partner? We’ve only had him for a few days. Doesn’t seem like he’d cause this much trouble.”
Joel rubbed his temples more vigorously, trying to stave off the waves of pain. “It’s been rougher than I expected, okay? Just one of those days.”
Tommy didn’t look convinced, but he didn’t push the issue further. “Alright, if you say so. But if this keeps up, you should get it checked out. Don’t let it go too long.”
Joel nodded, grateful for Tommy’s concern but unwilling to admit the full extent of his struggle. “Yeah, I’ll be fine. Just need to rest.”
Joel couldn’t even convince himself. He just didn’t find strength to face you.
That evening, the bar was lively, filled with the hum of conversation and laughter. Joel sat at a corner table with Lori, Tommy, and Maria. He was trying to focus on the conversation, but the throbbing pain in his head made it difficult. Lori, noticing his discomfort, kept a concerned eye on him, occasionally reaching out to touch his arm reassuringly.
As you walked in, the bar’s ambient noise seemed to momentarily quieten, and Joel’s gaze instinctively shifted toward you. You moved with purpose, but your demeanor was cold and distant. Tommy and Maria spotted you first and greeted you warmly.
“Hey, it’s good to see you,” Tommy said, waving you over.
Maria offered a friendly smile. “Yeah, come join us.”
You returned their greetings with a nod, but when your eyes met Joel’s, you turned your attention elsewhere, ignoring him completely. Joel shifted in his seat, trying to hide his discomfort, but the strain was visible in the tense lines of his face.
Lori noticed the awkwardness and frowned. “You could at least hide you jealously and stop being a mean bitch” she said to you, loud enough for everyone around to shut.
The bar’s noise seemed to drop as Lori's words cut through the air. You felt every eye on you as the tension escalated.
You turned to Lori, your face hardening. “I’m not here to entertain you or play nice.”
Lori’s face flushed with anger. “Well, if you can’t be civil, then maybe you shouldn’t be here at all.”
Joel, trying to defuse the situation, interjected, “Lori, that’s enough.” His voice was strained, both from the growing migraine and the emotional weight of the confrontation. “We don’t need to make this any worse.”
“No! I’m tired of this bitch being a pain to us just because you don’t love her back” she continued, calling you out.
Joel’s face tightened with a mix of frustration and pain. “Lori, seriously, stop. This isn’t helping anyone.”
You stood tall, your voice icy as you spoke. “I don’t need a lecture from you or anyone else. I’ve been nothing but professional, and this—” you gestured between yourself and Joel, “—is a personal matter. I’m done being the target of everyone’s frustration.”
Joel’s gaze wavered, his eyes reflecting the hurt from your words. “You don’t have to be like this.”
“No,” you snapped, “I don’t have to be here at all. If you want to know why I’m acting this way, it’s because I don’t want to be around someone who can’t see my worth.” Your voice cracked with emotion. “You can keep Joel. I don’t want a man who can’t appreciate me.”
You sighed, taking a deep breath. “I’m so done with all your pity because the man I’m in love with doesn’t remember loving me. But life moves on, and so do I. I’m done being the center of anyone’s misplaced sympathy.” You sighed a little, embarrassment creeping up your body “I’m just- I want you all to stop talking about me as if I’m a broken little girl, please.”
With a final, resolute glance at the group and the rest of people inside, you turned and walked out of the bar. The door swung shut behind you, the muffled noise of the bar fading as you stepped into the night.
Joel froze there, the harsh sting of your words lingering.
The man I’m in love with.
Why did you even love him?
Joel’s heart pounded in his chest as he processed your words. The sting of your rejection mixed with the searing pain in his head, making it hard to think clearly. He stood frozen for a moment, watching you leave, his mind racing with regret and confusion.
After a few seconds, he shook himself out of his daze. He could feel Lori’s eyes on him, her frustration still palpable. Ignoring her, Joel pushed himself up from the barstool, his movements tense and hurried.
“Sorry, I need to go,” he muttered, his voice rough and distant. He didn’t wait for a response and headed for the door. As he stepped outside, the cool night air hit him, offering a brief reprieve from the oppressive atmosphere of the bar.
Joel saw you standing just outside the bar, leaning against the wall with your arms crossed tightly over your chest. The cool night air seemed to accentuate the solitude you radiated, and the flickering streetlight cast uneven shadows over your face. Joel’s heart ached as he approached, the intensity of his migraine fading into the background compared to the weight of his regret.
He stopped a few feet away, taking a deep breath to steady himself. "Hey," he said, his voice rough but gentle. "I didn't mean to... to make things worse tonight."
You looked up, your eyes meeting his. They were red-rimmed, a sign of the emotional toll the evening had taken. "What do you want, Joel?" Your voice was quiet but edged with defiance.
Joel shifted uncomfortably, the words coming out in a rush. "I know I screwed up. I know I can’t undo what’s been done. But I want you to know that I’m sorry. I was a damn fool, and I didn’t see how much you were hurting."
You shook your head, looking away. "It’s too late for apologies. You made your choices."
“I know,” Joel admitted, his voice heavy with sorrow.
“Go back inside to your woman” you said, voice steady yet the truth of the words cut your throat.
Joel looked at you, his eyes filled with an aching with regret and yearning. He could feel the pounding in his head lessen, as if your presence, though tense and fraught with pain, was soothing the storm within him.
He swallowed hard, trying to find the right words. "I don't want to go back inside. I came out here to talk to you. I need to explain—"
You cut him off, your voice colder now. "I don’t want explanations, Joel. I want you to be honest with yourself and with me."
Joel's expression faltered, his usual resolve wavering under the weight of his migraine and the emotional strain. "I don't know what to say," he admitted quietly. "Every time I try to make things right, I just seem to make it worse."
"Look," Joel said, taking a step closer, though he kept a respectful distance. "I know I can’t fix everything right now, and I know I’ve hurt you more than I ever intended. But if there's any chance at all to mend things, I want to try. I need to try."
You glanced at him, feeling the strange mix of emotions. His presence, his apology, even his struggle, created a confusing pull. You nodded, not trusting your voice.
"Just... take things slow," you said finally, your voice softening slightly. "Show me, don’t just tell me."
You gave him one last, lingering look before turning away, the night air feeling strangely lighter as you walked back toward your house. Joel watched you go, a fragile sense of relief mingled with the lingering weight of his migraine.
Joel nodded, his heart aching.
Week three
The situation between you and Joel remained tense and unresolved. Despite the brief moment outside the bar, there was still an emotional chasm between you two. Meanwhile, Joel's migraines continued to worsen, each one more debilitating than the last. The pain had become a constant companion, gnawing at him, making it difficult to focus on anything else.
Tommy had been watching his brother closely, his concern growing with each passing day. He had noticed how Joel winced at the slightest noise, how he gripped the edges of tables to steady himself, and how he often retreated to dark corners to try and alleviate the pain. Tommy knew something had to give, and he wasn't sure how much longer Joel could keep this up, especially with patrols still on the agenda.
During the morning, as the patrol assignments were being handed out, Tommy pulled Joel aside. “You sure you’re up for this?” he asked, his voice laced with concern. “These migraines… they’re getting worse, Joel.”
Joel nodded, though the movement sent a sharp pain through his temples. “I’ll be fine,” he muttered, not wanting to admit how bad things had really gotten. “Just need to keep moving, keep my mind off it.”
Tommy sighed, not entirely convinced. “Alright, but I’m pairing you up with someone who won’t hesitate to call for backup if things go south.”
Joel raised an eyebrow, wondering who Tommy had in mind. His answer came when you walked into the room, your expression unreadable as you glanced at Tommy, then at Joel.
“You’re on patrol with Joel today,” Tommy said, his tone firm, leaving no room for argument. “Consider it part of the consequences for that little outburst at the bar the other night.”
You opened your mouth to respond, but then closed it, seemingly deciding against saying anything. Instead, you simply nodded, surprising both Tommy and Joel.
Due to your situation with Joel, you would have argued, pushed back, but you didn’t. Whether it was out of a sense of duty, or because you had your own reasons for going along with the assignment, neither man could tell.
Joel looked at you, his expression hard to read. He wasn’t sure what to expect, but he knew that this patrol was going to be anything but ordinary. The tension between you two was palpable, and the fact that you hadn’t fought the assignment left him uneasy.
As the two of you geared up and headed out, the silence between you was thick, neither of you willing to break it first. The path ahead was familiar, but the atmosphere was charged with unresolved emotions and the weight of things left unsaid.
As you and Joel prepared to head out for patrol, Tommy pulled you aside, his expression serious. “Listen, I know things are tense between you two, but if Joel starts feeling bad, you come back immediately. No heroics, no pushing through it. Understood?”
You nodded, not meeting Tommy’s eyes. “Understood,” you replied, your tone neutral. The truth was, you didn’t know how you felt about being on patrol with Joel, but you weren’t going to argue with Tommy’s orders.
Tommy looked at you for a moment, as if he wanted to say more, but he held back. Instead, he just gave you a small nod before turning back to Joel, who was adjusting his gear a few feet away.
Joel caught Tommy’s eye, and there was a silent exchange between the brothers—Tommy’s concern evident, and Joel’s stubborn determination clear.
Once outside the gates, the silence stretched between you and Joel, heavy and uncomfortable. The forest around you was quiet, the only sound was the crunch of your boots on the dirt path. You kept your eyes ahead, focused on the task at hand, but you couldn’t help but be aware of Joel’s presence beside you.
As you walked, you noticed something strange. Joel, who had been rubbing his temples and wincing in pain earlier, seemed to be a bit more at ease. The tight lines of pain on his face had softened, and he wasn’t clutching his head like he usually did.
You didn’t want to think too much about it, but you couldn’t help but wonder if your presence had something to do with it.
Joel, too, was aware of the change. He had been bracing himself for another wave of pain, expecting the migraine to hit hard as it had been for days now. But instead, he felt… better. The pain was still there, lurking in the background, but it was muted, manageable. And the only thing that had changed was that you were with him.
As you continued walking, the strange shift in the atmosphere didn’t go unnoticed. Joel glanced at you every now and then, his brow furrowing slightly, as if he was trying to figure out what had changed. You kept your focus straight ahead, but the weight of the unspoken tension between you two was hard to ignore.
After a while, you slowed down and finally came to a stop, gesturing for Joel to halt as well. Without saying anything, you walked over to your horse and untied a small bouquet of flowers that had been carefully wrapped and secured to the saddle.
Joel watched, puzzled, as you held the bouquet tightly in your hand. "Just... just wait for me here for a bit," you said quietly, your voice barely above a whisper. There was a softness to your tone that caught Joel off guard, and he nodded, sensing that whatever you were about to do was important.
You walked a short distance off the path, through the dense trees and underbrush, until you reached a small clearing. The air was still, and the only sound was the rustling of leaves in the gentle breeze.
Joel stayed where he was, leaning against his horse, but his eyes followed you, curiosity and concern mingling in his expression.
In the clearing, you knelt down beside a small, unmarked grave, the earth slightly raised from where you had buried your boyfriend two years ago.
You placed the bouquet gently on the grave, your fingers lingering for a moment on the petals. Your heart ached with the familiar pang of loss, the pain of carrying love for someone who was no longer here. It was a pain you had learned to carry with you, but it never really went away.
As you knelt there, a few silent tears slipped down your cheeks, and you quickly wiped them away. This was a private moment, one you hadn’t shared with anyone, not even Joel. He had no idea about the depth of your loss, about the man you had loved and lost before arriving in Jackson.
When you finally stood up and turned back toward the path, Joel was still waiting, his expression unreadable. You walked back to him in silence, feeling the weight of your emotions pressing down on you.
"You alright?" he asked, his voice soft as his eyes studied your expression.
You didn’t answer right away, your fingers brushing lightly against your jacket. Finally, you spoke, your voice barely above a whisper. "This is where I buried him. My fiancé."
Joel’s heart sank as he remembered the voice of Tommy telling him some things he didn’t even remember about you. And now seeing you here, in this quiet, sacred place, made the weight of your grief all the more real.
"I didn’t know," Joel said, his voice laced with regret. He felt a pang of guilt for not being there for you when you had gone through this, for not understanding just how much you had carried with you all this time. "I’m sorry."
You nodded slowly, still staring at the grave. "It’s been a long time since I’ve come here. I didn’t think I’d be able to handle it, but… I guess I needed to say goodbye again. Properly."
Joel stepped closer, his presence a comforting warmth at your side. He didn’t know what to say, but he knew he needed to be there, to offer whatever solace he could.
"He was a good man," you continued, your voice stronger now. "He was kind, patient, everything I could have asked for. But this world… it takes everything good and leaves you with nothing but memories."
Joel clenched his jaw, feeling the familiar ache of loss that never truly went away. He knew all too well the pain of losing someone you loved, the emptiness that followed, the way it changed you forever.
"He deserved better," you said, your voice cracking slightly. "He deserved a future, a life. But instead… he got this."
Joel rested his hand gently on your shoulder. "I’m sorry," he repeated, the words feeling inadequate but all he could offer.
But instead of finding solace in his touch, you flinched, the weight of everything crashing down on you all at once. The grief, the anger, the overwhelming sense of loss—it all came flooding back, and you couldn’t handle it, not right now.
“Don’t touch me, okay?” you said, your voice trembling as you pulled away from him, putting a small but significant distance between you. You didn’t want to hurt him, but you needed space, needed to breathe without feeling like you were suffocating under the weight of your emotions.
Joel froze, his hand lingering in the air for a moment before he slowly lowered it, the rejection hitting him harder than he expected. He swallowed, trying to push down the rising tide of guilt and pain that your words had stirred up.
“Okay,” he murmured, his voice barely above a whisper. He knew better than to push, knew that you needed time to process everything on your own. But it didn’t stop the sting of your words from cutting deep, reminding him of all the ways he had failed before, all the ways he had let the people he cared about slip through his fingers.
“Peter was the only man who deserved my love,” you said, your voice laced with a mix of bitterness and sorrow. The truth of it stung, cutting through the air like a blade. You didn’t mean to be cruel, but the words slipped out before you could stop them, a reflection of the turmoil swirling inside you.
Joel swallowed hard, the hurt in his eyes evident as he processed what you had just said. He knew you were grieving, that you were speaking from a place of pain, but it didn’t make the words any easier to hear. For a moment, he didn’t know how to respond, his mind reeling from the sudden shift between you.
“I get it,” he finally said, his voice tight with emotion. “You loved him. And he was… he was a good man. Better than me.”
He looked away, unable to meet your gaze, feeling the weight of his own inadequacies bearing down on him.
“Yes, he was” you said without a doubt. “And that killed him.”
Joel’s heart clenched at your words, the blunt truth of them landing like a blow. He kept his eyes fixed on the ground, the weight of your statement pressing down on him. The silence between you grew thicker, charged with the grief and anger that neither of you could fully express.
“He and I had a kid” you confessed, you heart clenched at the memory of that little boy you took care of for five years of your life.
Joel’s head snapped up at your confession, his eyes widening in shock. The weight of what you had just revealed hit him hard, leaving him momentarily speechless.
“He and I… we had a kid,” you repeated, your voice trembling as you forced the words out. Your heart ached at the memory of the little boy you had taken care of, loved, for five years of your life. The pain of losing him, of losing the family you had built, was still fresh, a wound that hadn’t even begun to heal.
Joel’s expression softened, the anger and frustration that had been simmering beneath the surface giving way to something deeper—compassion, understanding, and an overwhelming sense of sorrow for everything you had lost. He could see the pain etched into your features, the way your shoulders slumped under the weight of your grief, and it broke something inside him.
“I’m so sorry,” he whispered, his voice thick with emotion. He didn’t know what else to say.
Tears welled up in your eyes, and you quickly wiped them away, not wanting to break down in front of him. “His name was Sam,” you continued, your voice barely above a whisper. “He was just a baby when we found him, abandoned… we took him in, raised him as our own. And then, one day” you sobbed, “They killed him…Those fucking soldiers killed him.”
“Peter and I had planned on how leaving all behind, he had hear about Jackson from a friend, and then he trusted the wrong people.”
Joel’s breath caught in his throat as he listened to you, the horror and anguish in your voice cutting through him like a knife. He could see the pain etched deeply into your features, the way your body trembled with the force of your grief. The image of what you had endured—losing not just your partner but the child you had raised together, taken away in such a cruel and senseless way—was almost too much to bear.
“They killed him,” you repeated, your voice thick with emotion as tears streamed down your face. “They took everything from me… from us. We just wanted to be safe, to give him a life that meant something. But those soldiers… they didn’t care. They saw us as a threat, as nothing more than collateral damage.”
Joel’s fists clenched at his sides, anger surging through him at the thought of what had been done to you and your family. He knew the kind of world you were living in, where trust was a dangerous thing, and hope could be ripped away in an instant. But knowing it didn’t make it any easier to accept.
“I’m so sorry,” Joel murmured, his voice thick with emotion. He wanted to say more, to find the right words to ease your pain, but everything felt inadequate in the face of such a profound loss.
You took a shaky breath, trying to steady yourself as you continued. “Peter and I… we had it all planned out. We were going to leave everything behind, start over in Jackson. He had heard about it from a friend, and it seemed like the only chance we had. But… he trusted the wrong people.”
Your voice broke again, the sobs coming harder now as you relived the nightmare. “They promised us safe passage, said they’d get us out. But it was a trap. They turned us over to the soldiers, and Sam… he didn’t stand a chance. He was just a little boy. He didn’t even know what was happening…”
Joel felt a lump in his throat, his own emotions threatening to overwhelm him as he watched you unravel before him.
Without thinking, Joel stepped closer, pulling you into his arms and holding you tightly against him. He didn’t say anything, didn’t try to offer empty words of consolation. He just held you, letting you cry against his chest, his hand gently stroking your back in an attempt to soothe you.
The world had gone eerily quiet after the gunfire ceased, the only sounds left were your ragged breaths and the distant cries of crows circling overhead. You could still feel the heat from Peter’s body fading beneath your hands, his blood soaking into the earth beneath him. The image of his lifeless eyes, staring blankly up at the sky, was seared into your mind, a horrific reminder that he was gone, that the man you loved, the father of your child, was never coming back.
You had been too stunned to cry, too numb to feel anything beyond the cold realization that you were alone.
Hours seemed to pass in a blur before you finally forced yourself to move. You couldn’t stay there, not with Peter’s body cooling beside you, not with the knowledge that those men might come back to finish what they started. So, you rose on shaky legs, your heart pounding in your chest, and stumbled away from the scene of the massacre, your mind numb as you left him behind.
The sun had begun to set by the time you found the old cabin, hidden deep within the woods. It was small, decrepit, with broken windows and a door that hung askew on its hinges, but it was shelter, and that was all that mattered. You pushed open the door and stepped inside, the musty smell of decay filling your nostrils as you surveyed the dark, empty space.
It felt wrong to be alive, to still be breathing when Peter wasn’t, when Sam wasn’t. But survival was instinctual, and something inside you kept pushing you forward, kept you searching for a way to stay alive, even when all you wanted was to curl up and disappear.
You sank to the floor, your back pressed against the rough wooden wall as the tears finally began to fall. They came slowly at first, like a trickle, but soon they turned into gut-wrenching sobs that echoed through the empty cabin. You clutched your knees to your chest, rocking back and forth as the storm outside began to roll in.
The wind picked up, howling through the trees and rattling the cabin’s fragile walls. Rain began to pour in heavy sheets, drumming against the roof and leaking through the cracks, pooling on the floor around you. Lightning flashed, illuminating the dark interior in brief, blinding bursts, and the thunder that followed was so loud it shook the very foundation of the cabin.
You were alone for the first time in years, truly, devastatingly alone. The weight of that realization crushed you, making it hard to breathe, hard to think of anything other than the emptiness that stretched out before you. The storm outside mirrored the chaos inside you, the violence of it a reflection of the torment that raged in your heart.
Maria and a group of people found you two days later
And you had become terrified of storms ever since.
You stiffened in Joel’s arms, the overwhelming flood of emotions too much. You couldn’t let yourself be comforted, couldn’t let someone else get close, not after everything you’d lost. The fear of opening up, of allowing yourself to be vulnerable again, was suffocating.
“Don’t,” you whispered, your voice cracking as you stepped back, pulling away from him. “Don’t touch me.”
Joel’s arms fell to his sides, the rejection clear in his eyes as he took a step back, giving you the space you needed. The hurt in his expression was evident, but he didn’t push, didn’t try to reach out for you again.
“You just feel pity because you see me as a broken doll” you said.
Joel’s expression tightened, his brow furrowing as your words cut through the air like a knife. He opened his mouth to respond but closed it again, clearly struggling with how to convey what he was feeling. The accusation hung between you, heavy and bitter, and the silence that followed felt suffocating.
“I don’t—” Joel started, his voice low and rough. He took a breath, trying to gather his thoughts, but the hurt in his eyes was unmistakable. “I don’t see you that way.”
“Then why are you here, Joel?” you demanded, your voice rising with the pent-up frustration and pain. “Why are you trying so hard to be… whatever this is? You didn’t care before, but now you do because I’m broken?”
“How were you so sweet to everyone after what happened?” he finally asked, his voice tinged with a mix of confusion and a hint of disbelief. It was as if he couldn’t comprehend how you managed to keep going, how you could still find kindness within you after everything you’d endured.
You looked at him, your expression softened by the lingering sadness, but there was a strength behind your eyes, a resilience that had kept you moving forward. “Because I didn’t lose them because of you all,” you said quietly, your voice steady despite the pain that laced your words. “I wasn’t going to become angry at the people who gave me another chance.”
The truth of your statement hung in the air, a stark contrast to the turmoil you felt inside. You had chosen to protect the small bit of humanity you had left, to hold onto the kindness that others had shown you when you needed it most. But that didn’t mean the anger, the grief, or the pain had disappeared—it was still there, buried deep, threatening to consume you if you let it.
Joel looked down, his shoulders sagging slightly as he absorbed what you said. He understood the weight of guilt, the way it could twist inside you, making you question everything. He had carried his own burden of guilt for years, but hearing you speak those words, seeing the strength it took for you to hold onto the good in the face of so much loss, it humbled him.
“I’m sorry,” he said again, the words barely above a whisper. “I wish I could take it all back, change what happened. What I did to you and how I treated you the morning you woke up in my bed” he sighed, “Sorry for not remember what happened between us”
You looked at him, your eyes filled with a quiet, resigned sadness. “It doesn’t change anything, Joel. It’s done. I can’t change the past either.”
Joel’s shoulders slumped, the weight of your words settling heavily on him. The finality in your voice, the distance between you, made him feel even more lost, and he turned away, the ache of regret and loss deepening with each step he took.
Joel walked away, his steps heavy and deliberate. The weight of your words hung over him, a constant reminder of the things he couldn’t change, the pain he had caused. Each step felt like a step further from any hope of repairing what had been broken.
You watched him go, the solitude of the moment pressing in around you. The quiet was suffocating, filled with the echoes of the past and the weight of unspoken words. You turned back toward the grave, the memories of what you had lost mingling with the present pain.
A simple affair, torturing you.
+
Grieving the death and grieving the living were taking a tool on you.
Week four
A week had passed since that tense confrontation. The days had been a blur of activity and emotional exhaustion, the storm within you a constant companion. The quiet conversations with others and the daily routines in Jackson offered little distraction from the lingering sadness, but they kept you moving forward, one step at a time.
Everyone could say than a simply affair would dissipate with the time, that each week would make you unlove Joel, but you couldn’t take a complete distance from your lingering feelings.
And Joel? Joel had kept his distance, following your request for space. His presence was felt in the background, a reminder of the unresolved tension and the feelings that had been left hanging in the air. You had seen him around, in passing, but there was an unspoken agreement that he would not intrude upon your space.
He couldn’t bear to face you.
One morning, as you prepared for another day at the infirmary due to Tommy’s request, you found yourself in the familiar surroundings of the clinic. The routine was a small comfort amidst the chaos of your emotions. The soft hum of medical equipment and the scent of antiseptic filled the air, offering a sense of order and control.
As you were organizing supplies and checking on your patients, a familiar voice broke through the calm. “Hey.”
You looked up from your tasks to see Joel standing in the doorway, his expression a mix of hesitation and resolve. He seemed slightly out of place in the clinical setting, but there was a determined look in his eyes.
“Joel,” you greeted, your voice steady but tinged with surprise. “What are you doing here?”
Joel took a step inside, his gaze scanning the room before settling on you.
“I’ve been trying to find the right time to give this to you,” Joel said, his voice a bit rough, as if he was struggling to find the right words.
Curiosity mingled with the apprehension you felt. “What is it?”
Joel took a deep breath, stepping closer but still maintaining a respectful distance. “It’s a little something I thought might help. I know it doesn’t fix anything, but I wanted to offer it to you anyway.”
You hesitated for a moment before reaching out to take the package from him. It was small and wrapped simply, the gesture surprisingly thoughtful given the circumstances. You carefully unwrapped it, revealing a worn leather-bound journal. The cover was embossed with a delicate pattern, and as you opened it, you found pages filled with blank lines, waiting for your thoughts and feelings.
“You can write on it,” Joel said softly. “And I thought maybe, if you wanted to, this could be a place for you to put everything that’s been on your mind. It’s not much, but I thought it might help.”
The gesture was unexpected, and as you looked up at Joel, you could see the genuine care in his eyes. It was a small attempt to bridge the gap between you, to offer something meaningful despite the unresolved pain.
You took a deep breath, feeling a mix of gratitude and sadness. “Thank you,” you said quietly, your voice almost choked with emotion. “It’s… thoughtful.”
Joel nodded, a small, almost relieved smile touching his lips. “I hope it helps, even just a little.”
There was a moment of silence between you, the weight of the past week settling in the air. Joel’s eyes searched yours, looking for any sign of the connection that had once been there, while you felt the tug of conflicting emotions—appreciation for the gesture, but also the lingering pain of his actions.
“How are your migraines doing?” You asked.
Joel looked slightly taken aback by your question, the personal nature of it a stark contrast to the more distant conversation that had been unfolding. He studied your face for a moment, perhaps surprised by your concern.
“They’re getting worse every day,” he admitted, his voice carrying a weight of weariness. “But today, I’m feeling a bit better. It’s been rough, though. The migraines have been relentless.”
You felt a rush of blood to your cheeks, concern and embarrassment at the question. “Tommy mentioned it,” you said quickly, wanting to clarify your source of information. “I just—well, I wanted to know how you’re doing.”
Joel nodded, his eyes softening slightly. “Thanks for asking. It means a lot. It’s been tough, but I’m managing.”
The vulnerability in his admission made you feel a pang of empathy. It was hard to see him struggling, especially when you had your own unresolved feelings and painful memories.
“Well, I’m glad you’re having a better moment today,” you said, your voice steadying as you tried to offer some comfort.
Joel’s expression grew more thoughtful, and he gave a small, appreciative smile. “Yeah, I’m holding onto that. Thanks for checking in.”
The silence between you was charged with unspoken emotions. You both stood there, the weight of your recent conversations lingering in the air. Joel looked like he was about to say something else, but instead, he gave a nod and started to walk away.
“Take care,” you called after him, the words carrying a genuine warmth despite the emotional distance that remained between you.
You had settled onto a barstool, a glass of whiskey in hand. The amber liquid was smooth and comforting, its warmth spreading through you as you took a sip. The effects of the alcohol were starting to take hold, making everything feel just a little more relaxed, a little more bearable.
Joel was at the bar, nursing a drink of his own. He hadn’t been particularly social that night, just sitting in his usual spot, lost in his thoughts. As the evening wore on and you became tipsier, you found yourself drawn to him, the comfort of familiarity outweighing the shyness that normally kept you at a distance.
You slid off your stool and made your way over to Joel, the room spinning slightly as you approached him. “Hey,” you said, your voice a bit louder than intended, carrying the cheerful buzz of someone who’d had a few too many drinks. “Mind if I join you?”
Joel looked up from his glass, his expression a mix of surprise and curiosity. “Sure, have a seat,” he replied, gesturing to the empty stool next to him.
You plopped down beside him, the warmth of his presence surprisingly comforting. “You know,” you said, leaning in slightly and grinning, “I don’t think I’ve ever seen you in here this early before. You’re usually so… serious.”
Joel chuckled softly, the sound of a low rumble that was both soothing and grounding. “Yeah, I guess I am. Just needed a drink tonight.”
In the afternoon, the usually calm atmosphere of the infirmary was disrupted by the sound of the door swinging open with a sense of urgency. Joel stumbled inside, his face pale and etched with pain. He moved slowly, his usual steady gait faltering under the weight of his unbearable migraines.
You looked up from your work, your heart sinking at the sight of him. He was clearly in distress, his eyes squeezed shut as if trying to shut out the world. You quickly set aside what you were doing and hurried over to him.
“What do you want?” you asked, intending to sound too rude.
“I—” Joel started, but the words were interrupted by a sharp grimace of pain. “I can’t take it anymore. The migraines… they’re just too much.”
“From one to ten? How much is the pain?” you asked.
“What’s that bullshit?” He cried out.
You took a deep breath, trying to keep your own frustration in check. Despite the roughness of Joel’s response, you could see that he was in genuine distress, and you needed to get a handle on his pain level to help him effectively.
“It’s just a way to measure how bad the pain is,” you explained, your voice firm but compassionate. “On a scale from one to ten, where one is no pain and ten is the worst pain, you’ve ever felt, where are you right now?”
Joel clenched his teeth, his face twisted with agony as he tried to focus. “It’s… it’s an eight,” he finally managed to say through gritted teeth.
He had saved that ten.
The ten was the amount of pain he had when he lost Sarah.
A ten was the pain his heart felt when he looked at you from the distance.
You nodded, quickly assessing the situation. “Alright, I’m going to get you something stronger for the pain. Try to sit down and breathe slowly. I’ll be right back.”
As you hurried to prepare a stronger medication, you felt the weight of the past few weeks pressing heavily on you. The bitterness in your words and his pain seemed to intertwine, creating a tense atmosphere that was hard to ignore. But your focus remained on getting Joel the relief he needed.
You quickly gathered the necessary medication and made your way back to Joel, who had seated himself on one of the examination tables. As you approached, you noticed his breathing was uneven, and his eyes were squeezed shut as if he was trying to block out the pain and your presence.
"Let me check your head," you said softly, your voice gentle despite the tension that hung between you. "I need to make sure there's nothing else going on."
Joel nodded slightly, his face still contorted in discomfort. As you leaned in to examine his head, your proximity made his breath catch in his lungs. The closeness between you seemed to amplify the charged atmosphere, making the air around you feel heavy.
You carefully placed your hands on his temples, your touch light but firm as you assessed his condition. Joel's breath became shallow and uneven, a sign that he was acutely aware of your closeness. He tensed under your touch, the intensity of his pain mixed with the vulnerability of the moment.
"How's that feel?" you asked, trying to keep your voice steady as you moved your fingers over his forehead and the sides of his head.
Joel swallowed hard, his eyes still closed as he tried to focus on your touch rather than the pain. "Feels… a bit better," he managed to say, though his voice was strained. "Just… don’t know if I can handle this much longer."
You gave a reassuring nod, trying to offer comfort despite the lingering tension. "You're doing great. The medication should help soon. Just hang in there a little longer."
You both could feel your breathing mingling together, the agony of the closeness taking everything from you.
Joel closed his eyes for a bit, feeling you scent and your fingertips on his temples. In the haze of his agony, there were fleeting glimpses of a night that felt both distant and achingly familiar. He remembered the warmth of your touch, the softness of your lips against his. The kiss you had shared the night before he got his memory back began to resurface, bringing with it a surge of emotions he had long tried to bury.
The kiss had been tender. Joel could almost feel the echo of that moment now, a soft, lingering taste of intimacy that was both comforting and heartbreaking.
He remembered the way you had looked at him, the way your eyes had softened with unspoken words. The image of your face, so close to his, the way you had smiled before the kiss, replayed in his mind with a clarity that cut through the pain. It was as if your closeness was pulling these memories to the surface, forcing him to confront them once more.
Joel’s breath caught as he recalled the warmth of your lips, the way it had felt to hold you close. It was a vivid contrast to the overwhelming pain he was experiencing now, and it made him realize just how much he had missed and lost. The memory of that kiss, the feeling of being connected to you, made his heart ache with a mix of longing and regret.
He let out a slow, shaky breath, trying to ground himself in the present while the memories swirled around him. As much as the past few weeks had been a struggle, this moment of closeness with you was stirring up feelings he had tried to keep buried. Joel’s eyes opened slightly, looking at you with a vulnerability that he hadn’t shown before.
“Sun…” he started, his voice barely above a whisper.
The sound of "Sun" coming from his lips felt almost foreign, yet deeply familiar. It was a term of endearment he had used before his memory loss, one that had held a special place between you two.
“Sun…” he repeated, the word carrying tenderness and longing.
Your heart skipped a beat, the nickname a bittersweet reminder of the bond you had shared. It was a small yet significant piece of the past surfacing, offering a glimmer of connection despite everything that had happened.
You felt a rush of conflicting emotions, the glimmer of hope mingling with a deep-seated fear of revisiting old wounds. The nickname, the touch, the faint echo of past affection—it all stirred up feelings you weren't sure you were ready to confront.
Taking a steadying breath, you stepped back, your hand moving quickly to hand him the medication. “Here,” you said, your voice steady as you handed him the small packet of pills. “This should help with the pain. You should head home and rest.”
Joel looked up at you, a flicker of understanding and disappointment in his eyes. He could sense the shift in your demeanor, the way you were putting distance between you both. “You sure you don’t need any help?” he asked, his voice laced with concern.
You shook your head, forcing a smile that didn’t quite reach your eyes. “No, I’m fine. Just… please, go home. A storm is coming, and you should get back before it hits.”
Joel hesitated for a moment longer, but the look in your eyes told him that you needed space, that pushing further would only cause more pain. With a reluctant nod, he took the medication and turned to leave, his steps heavy with the weight of what was left unsaid.
As he walked out of the infirmary, you watched him go, the storm outside a stark parallel to the storm brewing inside you. You closed your eyes for a moment, trying to steady yourself against the wave of emotions that threatened to overwhelm you. The fleeting connection, the memories stirred up—it was all too much to handle right now.
You were a bit tipsy, the effects of the whiskey making your steps a little unsteady. Joel walked beside you, his presence a steady anchor amidst the haze of your inebriation. You were both quiet, the conversation from the bar having dwindled into comfortable silence.
As you approached your house, you turned to him, a small, tipsy smile playing on your lips. The intimacy of the evening and the warmth of his proximity were too comforting to ignore. Without thinking, you leaned in and pressed a soft, lingering kiss against his lips. The action was impulsive, driven by a mix of affection and the blurred boundaries of alcohol.
Joel's reaction was immediate. He responded to the kiss, his arms finding their way around you as he deepened the connection. There was a brief moment where the world seemed to hold its breath, the kiss a sweet and tender promise of something more.
When you finally pulled back, your faces were flushed, and you looked at him with a mixture of uncertainty and contentment. Joel’s eyes were filled with a mix of surprise and warmth, the kiss having ignited something within him that he hadn’t anticipated.
“Good night, Joel,” you murmured, your voice soft and slightly slurred as you turned to go inside.
Joel watched you enter your house, his thoughts swirling in the wake of the kiss. He felt a strange blend of hope and confusion, uncertain about what the kiss meant for both of you. But the feelings were there, undeniable and strong.
The morning light streamed through the curtains, casting a soft glow in your bedroom. You woke up with a throbbing headache, the remnants of last night a blurry haze. As you shuffled through your routine, the details of the previous evening remained frustratingly out of reach. The bar, the tipsy laughter, Joel walking you home—these were fragments, but the kiss itself was a complete blank.
When you encountered Joel later that day, you greeted him cheerfully, assuming nothing out of the ordinary had happened. “Hey, Joel. How’s it going?”
Joel’s response was curt, his eyes avoiding yours. “Hey. I’m alright.”
You noticed the shift in his demeanor, the coldness in his tone. It was as if he was keeping you at arm's length, his usual warmth replaced with a frigid distance. You tried to brush it off, attributing it to a possible bad mood or personal issue.
Joel had resolved never to bring up the kiss, his feelings of hurt and confusion simmering beneath the surface. He’d come to see the incident as a miscommunication, a misunderstanding that he’d decided to keep buried rather than confront. The bitterness of feeling forgotten and dismissed had solidified into a quiet, unspoken rift between you.
Joel found himself unable to shake the feeling of the day's events. The migraine had ebbed slightly during the patrol, but as soon as he was back in his house, the pain returned, gnawing at him with a persistent, dull ache.
The house was quiet, save for the steady patter of rain against the windows. The storm outside was fierce, the wind howling and the rain pouring down in relentless sheets. Joel’s mood matched the tempest outside—stormy, unsettled.
As he was trying to organize his gear and get ready for bed, his eyes fell upon something on a chair near the door. It was the blouse you had lost that morning when he pushed you away from him, a soft, familiar fabric that he recognized immediately. He picked it up, holding it gently, and his mind replayed that morning events.
Joel held the blouse up to his face, breathing in deeply. The scent was faint but unmistakable—a mix of the outdoors, a hint of your perfume, and something more personal, something that reminded him of you. As the scent reached his senses, it hit him with a wave of emotions he hadn’t fully processed until now. He felt a rush of regret and longing. The migraine that had been a constant presence in his head now seemed to fade slightly as he held the blouse. The emotional weight of his actions, the pain he had caused you, and the gulf that had grown between you all came rushing back
You sat in the dimly lit living room of your small house, wrapped in a blanket, trying to find some semblance of comfort amidst the chaos outside. The storm had intensified, the wind howling and the rain slashing against the windows with a ferocity that made the walls tremble. Every rumble of thunder and flash of lightning felt like a jolt to your already frayed nerves.
You tried to focus on something—anything—to distract yourself from the fear that had settled deep in your chest. The living room was sparsely decorated, the bare walls and simple furnishings reflecting the practical, no-frills life you had tried to build for yourself. But tonight, it all seemed cold and empty, unable to offer you the comfort you so desperately needed.
You glanced at the clock. It was well past midnight, and sleep was elusive. The noise of the storm outside seemed to drown out any thoughts of rest. You wrapped your arms tightly around yourself, trying to stave off the chill that had little to do with the temperature and everything to do with the lonely feeling that had enveloped you.
As you huddled on the couch, the flashes of lightning illuminated the room in brief, stark bursts. Each flash cast eerie shadows on the walls, making the storm outside feel even more menacing. You found yourself jumping at every crack of thunder, your heart racing with each one.
Part of you wanted to reach out to someone, but who? The distance between you and Joel felt insurmountable, and you had made it clear that you wanted to be left alone.
The living room was filled with the sound of the storm, punctuated only by your occasional sighs and the rustling of the blanket around you. You tried to focus on breathing deeply, calming yourself in the midst of the chaos. But as the storm raged on, so did the turmoil within you.
It was during a particularly intense flash of lightning that you heard a knock on the door. Your heart leaped into your throat, and you froze. Another knock, louder this time, followed by a faint call. “It’s Joel. Can I come in?”
The voice was muffled by the storm, but it was unmistakable. Your emotions were a whirlwind of confusion and surprise. You hesitated, wondering why he would come here, why he would seek you out now, but the desperation in his voice made you move towards the door.
You opened it cautiously, the cold wind rushing in and mingling with the warmth of the living room. Joel stood there, drenched from the rain, his face lined with worry and a mixture of other emotions that you couldn’t quite place.
“Joel,” you said, barely above a whisper. “What are you doing here?”
He looked at you with an expression that was a mix of regret, concern, and something softer that you couldn’t quite define.
Words weren’t need for moments like these. Two hearts beating as the silence felt like freedom of the remised prisoner love victim of the passage of time, the destiny or perhaps the fate of cursing spells.
It was there for you to see it and it was there for him to see it, but blindness was his curse. Not remembering was his curse. Joel wasn’t incapable of loving someone, but he was terrified of the pieces of the old him coming to the present where losing people was a daily occurrence.
Joel was terrified of loving and losing the last flame of goodness left in this mad world that had tainted people, but you. There was a pure innocence in your eyes, in your actions and in your kindness and he had come to face his old him through you, the old him that had died with his daughter years ago.
Joel’s gaze lingered on you, his eyes reflecting the soft light from the flickering candles. His voice was a murmur, almost lost in the howling of the storm outside. “You’re afraid of storms.”, he said quietly, his voice low and gentle. It wasn’t a question. He was stating a fact, something you had confessed to him when the love affair between you was burning.
You looked at him, the realization dawning on you like the slow break of dawn. “You remember.” You whispered.
And you could only hear the steady beat of your own heart and the sound of Joel’s breathing.
I tagged everyone interested in part 2 but I couldn't tag everyone because all got mixed () if you don't want to be tagged you can tell me, if you want to be tagged, you can also tell me
💌 tags: @dreamtofus @paperstarzzz @chewie-bars @hotleaf-juice
@riedswifts @dizzyforyou @prideandaesthetic @chateaujoon
@18dmlk @orcasoul @whirlwindrider29 @frogjumps-world @camy-nyancat @sarahhxx03 @jasminedragoon @cuteanimalmama @eleganthottubfun @skysmiller @nana90azevedo @astralqueenoc
@missladym1981
#joel miller x reader#joel miller x you#joel miller x y/n#joel miller fanfiction#joel miller x f!reader#pedro pascal character fanfiction#joel miller series#the last of us fanfiction#joel miller#joel miller imagine#joel miller angst#tlou fanfiction#joel the last of us#joel x reader#Joel Miller#pedro pascal x reader#pedro pascal fanfiction#the last of us#pedro pascal imagine#pedro pascal
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—In fates eyes
Summary: You're the victim of a weird red string that won't let loose of your finger. And you don't know that your stalker is wrapped at the other end, already on the chase.
Tags: Soulmate AU, slight stalking
Words: 0,5
⊹₊ ˚‧︵‿₊୨୧₊‿︵‧ ˚ ₊⊹
Ever since you landed in this strange place, you couldn't rid yourself of the pesky scarlet string tied around your pinkie.
It clung stubbornly, snug but not tight enough to cut off your circulation. You’d tried everything—cutting it, biting it—but whenever you attempted to sever it, the string seemed to turn to steel, defying your efforts and leaving you frustrated. It stretched on through the strange landscape like a guiding line, silently inviting you to follow it. Whether you chose to do so was up to you.
What you didn’t know was that someone else was on the other end of the string, far away in another room. Mr. Scarletella had grown quite fond of the little red thread wrapped around his own pinkie. He understood what it meant—it tethered him to you, his beloved. With eager determination, he followed the string’s pull, feeling it occasionally go taut or slack, each shift only deepening his resolve. To him, the string wasn’t a nuisance; it was a blessing.
In your desperation, there was even a moment when you tried to sacrifice your finger to Mr. Gap, thinking it would free you. But to your astonishment, the string merely shifted to another finger, as if mocking your attempt. That was when you realized: you were stuck with it. Perhaps it was time to accept that fact.
Unbeknownst to you, Scarletella was closing in, watching from afar. He wondered if you were following the string as well, and hoped your curiosity would lead you to him. Eager to nudge you along, he tugged on the thread, leaving subtle hints in his wake. Yet you continued to ignore its presence, pretending it wasn’t there.
Scarletella’s patience, while immense, was not without its limits. The string was a bond he cherished, but the lack of response from your end was beginning to gnaw at his resolve. Each time he tugged, hoping for even the smallest acknowledgment—a pause, a turn of your head—he was met with silence. It stung more than he’d care to admit. Still, he pressed on, following the crimson line like a lifeline, his anticipation tempered by a growing desperation.
Meanwhile, you trudged forward through the unfamiliar terrain, the string tugging ever so gently at your finger, a persistent reminder of something—or someone—waiting at the other end. Yet, your wariness of this unexplainable connection kept you from fully committing to its path. What if it led to something dangerous? Or worse, something you weren’t prepared to face?
The chase came to an abrupt end when he suddenly appeared behind you, his eerie smile stretching wider as his excitement overtook him. Before you could react, you found yourself pulled into his arms, a crimson umbrella unfolding above to shield you both, casting everything around you in its scarlet glow.
Truth be told, he never needed the string. It was merely a symbol, a connection that fate had woven between you. But he was content—no, happy—that destiny had decided you were meant for each other. The string was just a reminder that, in the end, he had always been right where he needed to be.
#⊹₊⟡⋆satori.speaks#⊹₊⟡⋆writings#homicipher fanfiction#homicipher x reader#homicipher x you#homicipher#mr scarletella#mr scarletella x reader#homicipher scarletella#homicipher mr scarletella#mr scarletella x you
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Dom!abby cockwarming you during a scary movie ☽
CW: smut, MDNI, dom!abby, sub!reader, cockwarming obv, hair pulling, little degradation, spit??, sleeping with fingers inside, no y/n, no pdor
A/N: is this me procrastinating a full fic or me missing Halloween you pick your fighter!
☽ ☽
She knew you hated scary movies, she knew you’d get so freaked you’d jump into her lap and shove your face in her neck to avoid any jumpscares.
What you didn’t know was that the entire time she was strapped underneath her baggy grey sweatpants. Her clit throbbing in anticipation as you inch closer to her slowly.
She just wanted to make you feel safe, and how much safer could you get with her six inches deep into your cunt?
You were practically already on top of her, legs splayed over her muscly thighs, head nudged into crease of her neck, and eyes barely peering at the screen, hidden by the golden pieces of hair that framed her face.
She was so close to picking you up and moving you there herself, she couldn’t even focus on the movie, gawking at your bare thighs. She couldn’t wait to have you whining on top of her cock.
One last jump scare and you were done, crawling up onto her lap in search of comfort, little did you know you it would only get worse.
She giggles as you realize the destiny she set out for you. Widening your mouth at the realization and staring at her shit eating grin.
“Abs you- are you-“ before you can even finish she’s gripping the back of your neck to pull you into her open mouth, using her free hand to shift you into a straddle.
You can’t help but to grind onto the bulge over her sweats, moaning into her mouth. She takes the opportunity in stride to watch how pathetic you already are, “let’s make a deal-“ she says shoving her hand down your pajama shorts to drag agonizingly slow circles at your clit, “you’re gonna wrap this needy little cunt around my cock for the rest of the movie, and if you can finish it, I’ll let you cum.”
You whine at her proposal, just wanting to throw out the movie completely and let her split you open already. “B-but what if I can’t,” you pout.
She removes her hand to shimmy down her sweats just enough that the plastic cock springs out. Gripping into your thighs she turns you around to face the screen. She pulls the thin cloth of your pajama shorts to the side and guides you onto the strap, following a guttural plea pulled from your throat.
She pulls you gently by the hair so your back is flesh with her chest, “then I’ll sleep inside of you tonight,” she finishes her deal.
You whine at the sensation, the threat, and the desire to bounce on her cock without her permission. She loved doing this to you- seeing how needy you’d get for her to move.
But you knew your consequences, if you moved without her permission she’d just edge you over and over again, ruining every orgasm she was nice enough to bring you close to, but mean enough to never let you finish.
You were being so good, now that you were focused on her cock stuffing you full you, the movie wasn’t bothering you. You tried not making any noises knowing she’s get bored and thrust into you for her own amusement.
Your teeth were breaking the skin of your lip as she gripped into your hips and pulled you back harshly onto the plastic once. Almost drawing blood into the palms of your hands from your fingernails you try not to break. Thank god it wasn’t a real dick because you could feel yourself pulsing around the plastic.
She leans back into the shell of your ear, “you can play cool all you want, you’re soaking my fucking cock,” she says driving another thrust into you.
This time you can’t help but let out the whine pent up inside you, “awh there’s my slut, tell me how bad you need it,” abby coos.
“Please abs- please, I need you,” you beg as she lets out pleased sighs. This is exactly what she wanted, breaking you into a desperate mess on her cock, begging for friction.
“Be a good girl and suck on my fingers,” abby says, placing her two fingers at the entrance of your mouth, waiting for you to take the initiation.
Which you do, rolling and lapping your tongue around her thick fingers, knowing exactly what I’d get you in return.
Once she was pleased she removed them, taking them back to her own mouth, shooting her own spit on them and wrapping her forearm around your hip to rub circles on your swollen clit.
“Now show me how badly you need it,” a relieved sigh leaves your mouth at her approval. This is her way of showing you can finally use her cock to please yourself.
Bouncing up and down onto the soaking plastic as she shows no remorse on your clit. Even after you come, until the movie is over you have to keep her inside of you. She gives you a moment to regroup after an orgasm since you were good, but when she’s ready for another one she thrusts back in to signal you to start again.
She was nice this time, letting you sleep with her two fingers nuzzled into your cunt instead of the strap. 
#abby anderson#the last of us#abby anderson smut#abby x reader#abby tlou#abby anderson tlou2#abby angst#abby the last of us#abby x fem!reader#dom abby anderson#abby anderson x reader#abby tlou x reader#abby x you#abby anderson x f!reader#abby anderson x you#abby anderson x female reader#abby anderson fanfiction#abby anderson fanfic#abigail anderson
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be still my heart — jjk [two]
the one in which Jungkook lets his imagination run wild and you confront Jimin about your past.
genre : childhood best friends to enemies to lovers, physical therapist!reader x hockey player!jungkook, slow burn, smut, fluff, angst
word count : 5.1k
chapter warnings : strong language, kissing, jungkook is again nervous around Destiny. That's it i guess lmk if i missed anything.
a/n : ohmygod the first part got so much love i just couldn't wait to post this. This one is a bit intense. I love my babiest baby jungkook so much. Please enjoy my lovely people and remember you're so loved :> feel free to send asks. kisses.
Jungkook
During Jungkook’s college days, there was a guy named Oscar who’d sit beside him in class with his round glasses resting on his face. He would bunk classes almost every day which led the ever so curious Jungkook to follow him one day in order to find out what’s so special that he’s even willing to bunk classes for? Listen, the nerdy Jungkook thought bunking classes is bad manners. Don’t come at him.
Eventually, he found himself watching Oscar playing the guitar inside the vacant auditorium and he can swear he’s heard nothing more melodic than that. He figured the guy escaped so he could do what he loves. It was his passion.
If someone were to ask him, what’s his passion? Jungkook would say, Hockey. It pumps him up, it brings him back to life. He was born to do this.
He has seen his older brother playing hockey for as long as he can remember but trying the sport for himself? That never came to him, until his brother thought handing out a hockey stick to a 15 year old would be funny.
Newsflash, it wasn’t funny and as much as he doesn’t want to, Jungkook has no option than to give him the credit for him being here. It’s only right. The moment he held that hockey stick it was like the clouds parted and angels started singing.
This life right here is something he has built with hours and hours of practice, diet, diligence and working himself out until he’s a sweaty mess.
It’s not like every other 28 year old’s life, it’s different as well as demanding but every other 28 year old is also not being thrown into the penalty box like him right?
On a good day he would even call himself a conflict-avoidant guy until it comes to his teammates. Then, he’s an animal, ready to tear down every motherfucker who dares to touch them. Dramatic? he doesn't think so.
Yes, they piss him off but they’re a team, it’s a unified responsibility that they have. You stop at nothing to protect your own. The spark of defensiveness is bound to come to the surface given he's the defenseman of the team.
This is why he’s in here, trapped behind this glass shield as he watches the guys do their worst performance till date. The forward of the opposite team tried to get a fight started making Jungkook see red. His instincts led him to act immediately. He had to do something to put an end to it and breaking the guy’s nose seemed like a nice option.
The lions are not an easy team to play with, they’re hard hitters and show no mercy. That’s what coach has been telling them ever since they landed here. Seems like nobody listened. Fuckers.
Sweat drips from his hair as he watches the game, ears filling up with screams behind him.
“Jeon Jungkook I’ll have your babies”
“Jungkook you’re so hot it makes me insane”
“Oh god this man will be my death”
“He can slap me and I’ll thank him”
God help him. The thing is, the shitshow before him is not the only reason behind him being a mess today. Destiny has been… weird lately. At the risk of sounding like a goner, she’s not acknowledging him at all, like at all.
She used to grab the seat in front of him on the plane whenever the team flew for the games but this time she didn’t so much as look at the poor guy let alone sitting before him. Is she hurt because of last time? Did he fuck up again? This proclivity of fumbling every time he’s around her needs to be checked.
“Dude, we couldn’t have held a candle to them.” says Taehyung.
Ah yes, the guys lost the game if it wasn’t predictable enough and now the coach will have their heads on a platter ready to serve. Well, he doesn't want to do that any more than Jungkook himself does.
Jungkook gets rid of his shin pads, placing them on the bench. “Try saying that in front of coach”
“He’ll understand”
Yoongi glares at him, “The fuck he will. He’s been in our faces telling us how wild it might be over there. Who listened? Because you sure not did, Tae”
Taehyung chuckles in disbelief, propping his hands on his waist. “Dude, you’re targeting me as if I was the one breaking noses and all.”
He gives Jungkook a side eye. Oh he’s so gonna get Tae later.
“You might as well have. And as for you,” he glances at Jungkook, "I'll just hope you come back in one piece."
“Alright, cut it out” Namjoon says as he slips into his practice jersey. That’s so like him. Heading straight for practice after a big game, whether or not they win.
He’s one of the most dedicated people Jungkook has ever seen and you can’t generally get a praise out of him like this.
He blocks out their bickering and focuses on getting out of his hockey pants. A sharp pain shoots up in his knee making him cringe. That’s strange. He doesn’t remember his knee getting involved in the ruckus. Anyway, he makes a mental note of letting Destiny know about it and not repeat the same douchebaggery.
“Hey bud, you doing okay?” Namjoon asks as he’s rubbing the painful spot.
He looks up, “Yeah it’s… it’s just a slight pain. Might be a cramp for all I know”
He pats Jungkook’s shoulder in support, a kind smile plastered on his face. “I hope so and hey, don’t be picking fights like that anymore. You understand?”
Jungkook is quick to defend himself. “But that asshole–”
“I know,” he nods, “Just be careful. That’s all I’m saying. Let it be your last.”
He gives up, nodding his head. “Yeah. I’ll resist”
Namjoon is right. Jungkook did not pick a fight and he knows it. He also knows that Jungkook is always ready to come at his players’ defense, however that might be.
After all, it all boils down to a nasty fight on the rink which is nothing to be surprised about. There have been plenty of fights down here, some resulting in broken limbs and some going as far as a person on a stretcher.
˚୨୧⋆。˚
Nightclubs are hands down Jungkook’s least favorite spot ever. He hates the smell, he hates the crowd and he hates how loud everything gets. If it weren’t for Yoongi, he would be at home chilling or overthinking. No one can tell.
Although, he’s not sure if he can even call that four walled room his ‘home’. It’s not home, it’s just a place he was given to stay at when he joined the federation and while he’s more than grateful for it, an empty, emotionless space where he only exists in can’t be qualified as a home.
However, he can’t stop wanting a place which is only his. A place he can share with someone he loves, wakeup next to her, cook with her, make memories with her. A home overflowing with laughter and giggles only.
Clearly, that murky ass house can never live up to that expectation not when it consists of a bathroom smaller than his fist, a bedroom which can’t fit more than 3 people at once and a kitchen he, for some reason, can’t get himself to cook in. He believes someday he’ll have that albeit the wait.
“Do you think I’m joking?” Taehyung’s voice is louder than ever before because of the surroundings. Sitting beside Namjoon as his hands fist a glass of old fashioned, he acts like he just spilled the most expensive beans.
He dramatically places one hand on his chest and turns to Jungkook, “Dude, tell him. Tell him how I got my dick pierced last week”
A chuckle leaves him, “Better yet, you can lose those pants and give him a live show”
The guys break out in fits of laughter.
“Don’t act like you haven’t seen my dick already, you twat. I did it for my girlfriend alright? Was this close to tattooing her name too but didn’t,” he holds up his thumb and forefinger to show how much,
“I don’t want my guy to swell and look like I accidentally got it stuck between a door or something.”
From his peripheral vision, Jungkook spots Destiny walking up to them looking like an absolute goddess. She’s wearing a shoulder strapped bodycon dress tonight with her hair curled in such a way that it makes her face look more feminine. He has seen so much of her in those scrubs that she’s doing things to him now. Hold your damn horses, Jungkook.
The poor guy can’t so much as look at her for too long or he’ll get hard. That’s something he can’t allow himself to do right here when all his friends are gathered. They’re never gonna let him live that down.
Maybe, when he’s alone he can fuck his hand with the thoughts of her taking him into that sweet mouth she’s got a bold red lipstick look going on. His cheeks turn crimson and he fights back a smile.
“Hey, guys” she greets them as she tucks a hair strand behind her ear. A gold hoop adorning her. God, she’s trying to kill him. She's like Jungkook’s own version of heaven.
The guys all smile up at her like she just asked them to give her a foot massage. Meanwhile, her eyes never land on Jungkook.
“Jimin, can I steal you for a second?” she hesitates.
“Sure” Jimin places down his drink and stands up. He walks up to her and rests his hand at the small of her back making Jungkook’s smile drop. Nice, he's getting jealous over a kind gesture now. Next thing you know, he'll be ending anyone who dares to breathe in her direction.
Namjoon shakes his head as he follows them both with his gaze. “Am I the only one who thinks they’re fucking?”
Yoongi dissolves into laughter while Taehyung spits out his drink. Almost. Jungkook? He finds nothing funny about it but refrains himself from saying something stupid in the heat of the moment.
“There’s some tension, yes. Can’t say anything about the fucking part though” says Yoongi.
“What do you think?”
“What?”
“Do you think they’re shagging?” asks Taehyung in a hushed voice.
“I think you assholes need therapy” With that he rests his own glass of drink on the table and walks away. Their voices calling out to him become more and more faint as he goes on.
He needs to find out what is it that gave rise to this sudden change in Destiny and if he’s the reason for it. His stomach churns as soon as the thought of her having something going with Jimin crosses his mind.
The guys were joking back there and given their proclivity of joking around, he takes their statements with a grain of salt. Howbeit, he can’t help but wonder the same.
The worst thing of all is he doesn’t have any right to feel this way. She’s not his and she might never be for all he knows. So maybe this is for the best, maybe if she keeps on discounting him like this, it would be slightly easier to forget her. Right?
˚୨୧⋆。˚
Destiny
“What do you think you’re doing? This is a men's bathroom?” A guy who must be in his early twenties nearly pokes his finger in Jimin’s eyes. His gaze darts over to you as he gives you a disgusted look.
Jimin levels him with an intimidating glare, “Why don’t you mind your own damn business and we’ll be good. Yeah?”
He flashes you another appalling look, his nose flaring before he walks out. For a second you might even endorse with the guy but in your own defense, the club is buzzing with commotion and there was not a single space Jimin and you found where you both could have a proper conversation without anyone bumping into you. You spent quite the money on this dress and it'd be bummer to ruin it. It’s insane how crowded it is. So, here you are.
Jimin turns to you, his fingers still laced through yours for the sake of your safety. “I’m sorry for that”
You snatch your hand back. “No it’s totally fine. I mean it’s not usual for a guy to bring a woman in here” an awkward chuckles leaves you.
“It is”
Your smile drops, “Huh?”
“They do bring women in here. Well, let’s just say they do everything except have a talk”
Of course they do. God, this is more awkward than you imagined it would to be. You could die of embarrassment right now but if you don’t clear things up with him, it would be more humiliating to simply exist around him. You roll your shoulders back, plucking up enough courage.
“Let’s discuss the elephant in the room, shall we?”
He steps closer to you, just enough to catch you off guard but not enough to knock the breath out of your chest. There is someone else who's been doing that job lately.
“What elephant Destiny? The one about us having the best time together or how you left me the next morning? Alone and pathetic” he demands.
Well, knock me down with a feather.
Your mouth parts in shock, “I left you? You sneaked out, Jimin and you know it”
You wonder if he’s gonna come clean about that. If he’s gonna stop blaming you and take accountability for once. You guys did have the best time together and as short lived as it was, you regret nothing about that night until this point.
Now that he stands in front of you, accusing you of being so cowardly that you dared to leave him, it makes you question your own integrity.
He takes another step forward, automatically making you take one back as he searches your face. “So where were you when I woke up? Where were you when I reached my hand out and didn’t find you lying next to me, huh?” his voice barely a whisper.
Enough. You wouldn’t have bothered to stop the scream that’s begging to leave you had someone pointed a gun at your head. A gal can only take so much before she snaps.
“I WAS OUT THERE SEARCHING FOR MORNING AFTER PILLS”
The vacant bathroom echoes with your own words. The words you were holding back from saying out loud.
“I went in search of those, Jimin. Apparently, that’s what you’re supposed to do when you fuck each other and not take necessary precautions”
He stills, backing off as if you had slapped him. A heavy silence hangs in the air around you.
Jimin’s eyes flash with barely contained astonishment as he looks around trying to find words. When he doesn’t say anything, you take it as an opportunity to continue.
“You weren’t lying about us having a great time together. I accept that, we did have fun and I don’t regret it which honestly, I’m not so sure of now.”
A quick look of hurt passes through his face before he recovers.
“I was planning on staying back too oh… how badly I wanted to stay back but you have to understand that I was also at the prime of my career as a professional physical therapist. I couldn’t afford having a child, Jimin. Back then even the thought scared me. So, I left for a while, mentally promising you to come back. You were sleeping so soundly and you looked so beautiful and I didn’t want to disturb you—”
Your words come to an abrupt halt as he takes a long step towards you, backing you up against the white wall behind.
It’s not the same, your chest is not rising and falling rapidly like it did back then. Gosh, you couldn’t even speak in front of him. This time you’re immune to his eyes, his closeness and his warmth. Is this what they call healing?
“You should have” his brown eyes flash with hunger, “You should have disturbed me, Destiny. I would have woken up, ate you out, maybe fucked you again while wearing a condom, cuddled you and then accompanied you to the medical store.”
Oh fuck no, this is not happening. You’re not getting yourself back into this situation where he charms you with his mere words and leaves you cold. You deserve better than that.
You push him back with your palms on his chest, “Maybe, but I think I wouldn't have it any other way,”
You look straight into his eyes and nowhere else to make him feel how serious you are, leaving no room for uncertainty.
“Bella, my assistant, keeps saying that everything happens for a reason. It’s written up there," you point your forefinger up, "I feel the same about what went down with us. There was a reason why you left, there was a reason behind me not bothering to wake you up."
A bitter chuckle slips through your mouth, “Although, I can’t seem to grasp why the hell are you here?”
The way your heart is beating inside your chest, you might end up on a ventilator. It’s because you haven’t had much control of anything in your life, this feels particularly massive. This is one way for you to take back control, because it’s your choice and yours alone.
You try not to let the tears spill, “I asked you to spare me a few minutes just so I could talk to you about it but this isn’t how I imagined this conversation to go, Jimin. Regardless of that, I need you to do me a favor”
He holds your gaze. “What favor?”
You clear your burning throat, “I’m requesting you to please not initiate any conversation about our past with any of the guys. That could pretty much cost me my job and yours.”
He offers you a stern nod, “You have my word”
With that you turn and walk around just like you always do and always should when it’s time. Only this time, you don’t feel victorious. Instead, the feeling of utter shock rushes through your body because standing outside is the only person you had been avoiding to say the least.
You flinch. “Jungkook?”
He’s leaning back against the cold wall with his hands inside his front pockets, head hanging low. You can’t make his face out because of the darkness.
He frantically lifts up his head when he hears you calling, looking as surprised as you, “Hey, I— wait, why are you coming out of the men’s room?”
You shift on your feet, folding your hands in front of you. “What? OH !! Well, I had some business with Jimin and this felt like a nice place to.. you know”
You can’t talk for the life of you. How do you explain yourself to him without word vomiting? But then you think better of it and just shake your head.
“You know what? Never mind that. What about you? Why are you standing here like someone just broke your heart?”
No fucking way did you just say that. What is this? A bollywood movie? You immediately feel like you hit a nerve when his face falls, causing you to curse yourself.
He’s silent for a moment before he stands up straight. “You could say that”
“Wait, really?”
Yet again you’re struggling to breathe, a spark of curiosity threatening to rise up. Why do you care about his heart? He’s been all but rude to you every day since you’ve begun working by his side so why would you care if someone put his bloody heart in a blender? You have been assigned to take care of his body, what happens unrelated to that is none of your business.
Except, you do. There is a teeny tiny part of you that cares. Though, you can’t say if it’s the doctor inside of you or something else. Something which could ruin you and save you all at once.
“Who is it?” you ask in a small voice.
His eyes rank behind you and he pulls you close to him by grabbing your arm. You see a man passing by, faltering on his own under the influence of probably the sheer amount of alcohol inside him.
When you look up, you have to swallow a gasp. Jungkook’s face is so close to you, you can almost count his moles. The one under his lips is begging to be kissed and you hold yourself back from grabbing him by his jacket as you kiss the hell out of him.
Wait what?!
He looks down at you, his eyes burning with something you can’t pinpoint. It’s like a mixture of anger and adoration. Soft lips brush your temples as your heart beats out of your chest.
“It’s not safe here. Why don’t you go join Bella? If I break another nose it’ll cost me good”
You lean back, still in his arms. It would be nice if you get out of his hold. You should shove him away too exactly like you did with Jimin but for some reason, you can’t. His hold is safe, cozy. It reminds you of your grandmas cookie recipe. Warm and lovely.
“Another nose? Did you get into a fight?”
He breaks away, turning his back to you but you clutch his forearm as you hold him back before he can bolt.
“You know the PR is gonna make your life a living hell. What did you do?”
His jaw sets instinctively as he looks at you for a moment before speaking.
“Destiny, if you don’t want me kissing that sweet mouth of yours and imprint my name on it for once and for all, get the fuck out of here.” he rasps.
That's it. Flashbacks of that night and that fucking dream consume you. It doesn't help at all that he looks so dashing tonight in all black. Black leather jacket, black pants and his black boots. You're having visions you shouldn't have. They're nice. Farfetched but nice, nonetheless.
You release his hand like it will set you have you combust if you keep holding onto it for even a moment longer. You turn around, with the intent of getting out of his proximity when his voice stops you.
“Destiny”
You don’t turn around because something is telling you if you do, you will never be the same.
“My life turned into a living hell the moment you stopped looking at me”
˚୨୧⋆。˚
Jungkook
Jungkook is dying.
Figuratively, of course.
He should have taken Destiny seriously when she said that the PR is going to make his life miserable once he gets to know about the mess he had made. His phone is buzzing on the kitchen counter. He knows who it is but he doesn’t pick up.
Instead, he just waits until it stops ringing. Jungkook can see it all playing out in his head. He will be called to the PR’s office as soon as he enters the academy and the PR is gonna ask him why he did what he did, Jungkook will then tell him that he's a a man of virtue, he will ask him to repent and tell him to fuck off. Very classic. Been there, done that.
He drops his head low, palms splayed in front of him. Calling last night chaotic would be an understatement. He said things he shouldn’t have and heard things he hoped he wouldn’t. It was not deliberate, of course. He would like to call it a spur of the moment.
Alright, he was fucking jealous. There he said it. He was jealous of Park Jimin because that man was touching who Jungkook had been longing for, he was talking to the women Jungkook had been begging to look at him once and allow him to breathe.
When he reaches the academy, he quickly asks about Destiny’s whereabouts and goes on to find her. He thinks his knee needs to be discussed because he can’t risk not playing the next game.
He's not sure if he's prepared for the uneasiness that's about to welcome itself but– god if you’re listening, help him, he prepares himself as much as he possibly can.
Raising his hand to make a fist, he knocks on her office door. This would be his first time inside, if she would even let him in.
“Come in” her voice reaches Jungkook.
He takes a long deep breath and pushes the door wide open. Stepping inside he looks at her sitting in her chair with glasses resting on top of her button nose. She looks so adorable. He doesn’t think he has ever seen her with glasses on but he approves.
“Jungkook? Is everything okay?”
Is it? Why is she acting like everything about last night was a dream? Did I imagine it all? Jungkook wonders.
He slips his hands inside his front pockets and nods, “My knee is acting a bit weird. I wanted to get it checked. See if there’s anything serious.”
She takes her glasses off and rises to her feet. Pointing to one of the chairs, she says, “Sit down and let me have a look”
He does what she asked as he leans back to make himself comfortable. An eerie silence surrounds them, making every inch of Jungkook's body stiff as he grips the armrests of the chair a bit tighter. He doesn’t let it appear that way of course. He’d rather die.
When she’s satisfied, she gets down on her knees and looks up at him. The visual is lethal but not something which he hasn’t already imagined.
He's not entirely proud to say that he has had the privilege of seeing her on her knees in his dreams, in the darkness of his bathroom, in his fantasies. He's seen it all but the real sight nearly makes him blow his load.
What do you think happens to a man who witnesses a queen getting down on her knees for him? Ask Jungkook. Mentally thanking himself for not wearing the sweatpants, he prepares to answer any of her questions.
“Do you wanna tell me what caused this?”
“There um, there was a fight back at the game. I felt a slight pain in the changing room but didn’t think much of it. Thought I’d let you know about it.”
She smiles, “Well I’m proud of you for that minus the fighting part. I’m sure you’ll be discussing that in the PR’s office”
As she’s examining any possible pulls or cracks, he thinks about apologizing to her about last night. To be very honest, he's tired of this awkward silence every time he's around her. Not talking is one thing, walking on eggshells around each other is another. He wants her to behave the same way she does with the rest of the boys.
“Destiny, I needed to talk to you about something”
She looks up again, her eyes filled with curiosity.
“Sure. Was something else hurt during the fight?”
“What? No. I wanted to talk about last night”
She stiffens as her mouth forms an ‘O’ shape. Fuck, why is his heart beating so fast? Wait, is he sweating?
Then she shrugs, talking in a casual tone. “I don’t think it’s worth talking about”
“Why?” Jungkook can’t help but ask.
“Well,” she smiles but it doesn’t reach her eyes, “You and I both were drunk and people do stupid stuff when they’re drunk so.”
“There was not a single drop of alcohol in my system. However, whatever I said was in the spur of the moment.” he says wording his previous thoughts, “I shouldn’t have talked to you like that. I’m sorry”
She’s quiet for a moment before she lowers her head and mumbles something.
“WellIhadasexdreamaboutyousoweareeveniguess”
He lowers down his own head, trying to listen clearly, ‘What was that?”
“I said I had a sex dream about you so we’re even” as soon as the words slip out of her, she claps a hand over her mouth. Her eyes wide as saucers. Meanwhile, he just sits there wondering if he heard her right or his brain is as fucked as his knee.
His mouth goes dry as he keeps looking at her. He feels like someone just dumped a bucket full of ice water on his head. She had a sex dream about him? When? How was it?
“It was uh okay”
Kill him, kill him now because he said that out loud. See, this is what he means when he says he messes up every time he's in front of her. That’s exactly what the last thought that crosses his head before he pulls her by the back of her neck and smashes his lips on hers. Fuck it, he can’t take it anymore.
When she kisses him with the same amount of passion and hunger, he resists himself from hoisting her up on the table and eating her sweet cunt. She matches every movement of his lips. Hers suck his before his take her pink and pillowy ones.
Within seconds, he has her caged in his arms. A low moan slips past her lips as she clutches onto Jungkook's shoulders for support, his fingers digging into the sides of her waist. Is this what feels like to kiss Kim Destiny? Is he actually touching and tasting her?
She tastes like cherries and bubblegum and he swears he's tasted nothing sweeter. He wants to have this taste every day on his tongue, and wants to remember it till the day he takes his last breath. Maybe, even longer than that.
He pulls back and cups her cheek, running his thumb along her lower lip as she catches her breath. She’s got her eyes closed, her chest rising and falling against his. Jungkook can feel her hard nipples through her scrubs.
Someone shakes him by the shoulders and he snaps out, blinking rapidly. He looks around and finds himself sitting on the very chair Destiny asked him to but when a feminine voice calls out his name, it's not hers.
“Well, watching my best friend on her knees in front of my step brother was not the visual I thought I needed”
Turns out, it takes a lot to make that someone up there 'happy' because standing in front of him is his only step sister. It's hilarious how unpredictable life happens to be. After all, not only did he imagine kissing Destiny after she told him about her little sex dream but will now have to figure out how to face his sister without wanting to hurl himself out the window.
Can he catch a break?
Taglist - @keylime4eva @xumyboo @jash719 @dmstoyangyang @pitchblack0309 @withluvjm @chaelvrx @httpjeonlicious @lovingkoalaface @rpwprpwprpwprw (ilusm and thank you for reading <3)
#jungkook x reader#jeon jungkook#jungkook#jungkook fanfic#bts#jungkook scenario#jungkook smut#jungkook scenarios#jungkook x you#bts x reader#jungkook imagine#bts scenario#bts fanfic#bts scenarios#bts smut#bts jungkook#jungkook fluff#jungkook angst#jungkook drabble#jungkook series#jeon jungkook x reader#jungkook oneshot#fluff#caramelkoo
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𝐼𝑅𝐼𝑆 — 𝑀𝐴𝑇𝑇𝐻𝐸𝑂 𝑅𝐼𝐷𝐷𝐿𝐸
↳ short mattheo riddle drabble based off the song “iris” by the goo goo dolls.
─── ⋆⋅☆⋅⋆ ───
and i’d give up forever to touch you
cause i know that you feel me somehow,
mattheo riddle never let himself feel anything other than hatred, until you came into his life. before you, he was just numb, nothing that pure rage and darkness. but with you, everything changed. he didn't need words or grand gestures, just being near you was enough to make him feel...something. it was like, for the first time, someone actually saw him. and the first time you touched him, when he let his guard down and let you in, something deep inside him shifted. you buried your face in his chest, and he froze, not knowing what to do. the only touch he’d ever known was violent and cruel, so he didn't know how to handle the soft, soothing way you held him. but once he gave in and wrapped his arms around you, he knew he’d give up everything for just one more second of this.
✩✩✩✩
you’re the closest to heaven that i’ll ever be
and i don’t wanna go home right now
everyone else saw mattheo as nothing but trouble, like he was born bad. darkness seemed to follow him everywhere, and he figured that was just how it was supposed to be. hell had probably been his destiny from the moment he was born. but then you came along. you, with your golden heart and warm soul, gave him a taste of something pure, something he knew he didn’t deserve. somehow, he had found his way into your life, into your heart, and for the first time ever, he understood what “home” meant. he never had a real home before, no place or person to run back to. but now, you were becoming that for him. his safe place, his shelter.
✩✩✩✩
and all i can taste is this moment
and all i can breathe is your life
and sooner or later it’s over
i just don’t wanna miss you tonight
mattheo wasn’t stupid. letting you in gave him hope, but deep down, he knew the truth. no matter how much he tried, he’d never be good enough for you. the connection you shared felt like a temporary dream, something that could disappear at any second. he promised himself he wouldn’t let anyone see him weak, but you made that impossible. the closer he got to you, the more he feared what would happen when it all fell apart. that’s just how he was, doubting everything, second-guessing every feeling. because he’d always been broken, and he couldn’t imagine anyone seeing past that. but with you, he wanted to try, even if it meant risking everything. because he found himself missing you everytime you weren’t around.
✩✩✩✩
and i don’t want the world to see me
cause i don’t think that they’d understand
when everything’s made to be broken
i just want you to know who i am
mattheo never cared about what the world thought of him. everyone saw him as ruined, a lost cause. they couldn’t understand the storm inside him, the pieces that never fit together quite right. he knew he was broken, and he had grown to accept that. but you saw through the cracks, past the sharp edges, and somehow, you still wanted to know him. he didn’t want to hide from you, didn’t want to pretend to be someone he wasn’t, but he didn’t understand why you stuck with him even after seeing his dark side. for the first time, he wanted to be seen. not as the person everyone else thought he was, but as the person he really was, deep down. he just wanted you to know him, the real him, the one who was scared, vulnerable, and maybe even a little bit hopeful. because in a world full of chaos and brokenness, you made him feel like he could be someone else, just for a moment.
─── ⋆⋅☆⋅⋆ ───
a/n : i thought about this after making the moodboard the other day, iris is literally the theme song of my life and i listen to it 24/7. anyways my requests are open, please like/comment/reblog and tell me if you wanna be tagged !!!
@iris-qt @tateshifts @myunperfektstorys @yikesitslush @sp7-mr @shiftingwithmars @redeemingvillains @helendeath @larmesdevanille @fluffycookies22 @reys-letters @mattheosdior @sylviaonyx @fbvreadingblog @moonlightreader649 @jolly4holly @elsie-bells @bellatrix-lestrange5 @icantkeepmyplantsalive @dexoq
#mattheo riddle oneshot#mattheo riddle fanfic#mattheo riddle x y/n#mattheo riddle imagine#mattheo riddle x you#mattheo riddle drabble#mattheo riddle fluff#mattheo riddle x reader#slytherin boys react#slytherin boys x you#slytherin boys pov#slytherin boys x reader#slytherin boys imagine#slytherin boys headcanons#enzo berkshire#lorenzo berkshire#theodore nott#theo nott#blaise zabini#draco malfoy x reader#lorenzo berkshire x reader#theodore nott x reader#shifting to hogwarts#shifting realities#shifting stories#harry potter#marauders#fictional characters#iris goo goo dolls#mattheo riddle
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Affinity (Various OP Characters x Reader)
Characters: Brook, Buggy, Beckman, Crocodile, Zoro, Mihawk, Corazon, Shanks, Law
Rating: SFW
Word Count: ~4k
A/n: Reader is GN! I kinda made this after hearing about a special thing in my religion, and decided I wanted to do this. I of course made it more romantic in nature than the original idea goes, but hey, romance! I had my followers choose 7 originally but it went to 9, which is a very lucky number in my religion so maybe it was a sign? Who knows! Please enjoy <3
Tagging: @fanaticsnail @gingernut1314 @undeadeurydice @i-am-vita @kiribuchi @therosietoesy (sorry, I forgot who asked for Law my bad)
———————————————————————
There is a belief that before you are born, you were once a soul that had existed with other souls. Souls who had an affinity for each other would find that affinity carried in their time as a human. Souls who repelled each other would find that distaste carried over as well. Perhaps it was preordained, fate, destiny- whatever you’d call it. Regardless, it seems your soul has met with someone who once had an affinity for you…
Brook
Being an undead figure unable to pass on was not what Brook had in mind. In some ways, he was grateful for another chance at life, another chance to do what he previously was too dead to finish. Albeit, being a pile of bones did have its drawbacks.
While he could still function and do things many humans did, fact was, he was anything but. One look at him would easily make him stand out as something like a freak of nature.
Skeletons cannot love and be loved like a human. He could hold, but could not be held like a human. Admittedly, it had bothered him on occasion, but he always tried to brush it off with a simple hum or shrug. After all, he had his friends and crewmates- and he had a promise to continue fighting for. That should be enough.
But he couldn’t stop his eyes (if he had any) from wandering… couldn’t stop the way his mind wondered…
Just what could it be like if I too could fall in love?
Ah, but that’s such a silly thing for a skeleton to consider. Who could ever love the undead remains of someone long forgotten?
He’d practically given up on such silly notions like love or a relationship- it didn’t fit his current predicament.
So Brook focused on his music and his performances instead. He held up his violin and decided to waste some time on this sunny day playing for his audience of a few blue birds chirping at this green park. It was beautiful and reminded him of his day with the Rumbar Pirates- agh, nostalgia was always his weakest attribute, he thinks.
His fingers drift along the strings of the instrument, peacefully playing his weary heart away. He doesn’t recognize he has another guest until he hears slow clapping.
“What?” He turns his head, surprised to see you on the bench, smiling and clapping.
“That was lovely,” you comment. Time slows still and your eyes meet, shining (e/c) eyes with hollow black sockets.
If he had skin, perhaps he would’ve been red or sweating buckets. As a skeleton, he was not able to do things. But Brook was still a man through and through, and he couldn’t help but freeze at seeing the way your eyes were soft and full of admiration.
“I’m glad you thought so. Music is my pride and joy.”
“I can tell,” you reply. “I felt like I forgot to breathe for a moment when I heard that. I’m sorry for watching, though, if you weren’t looking for an audience.”
“N-no, actually it was…” he was too caught up in the way his soul was resonating and burning within him. “I appreciate it actually. Would you like me to play a song for you?”
“Would you? I’d love to hear more!”
Buggy
Buggy never believed in things like soulmates or fairy tales or blah blah blah- it was all junk! The only thing he ever could trust was treasure- shiny, bright, treasure! What else did a pirate need or want?
Is what he would say out loud- Buggy, even at a young age, was secretly a romantic who refused to let himself be swept up in the sentiment. When him and Shanks would sail together on Roger’s ship, Shanks would often ask what he thought about love.
Unlike Buggy, Shanks was pretty honest and confident about his assertions. Buggy would stumble and try to keep the bravado up, pretending as if he didn’t secretly yearn for a person who could look past his red nose and maybe possibly sorta kinda like him? Was that too much to ask? If you were Buggy, the answer was yes, because he would never allow himself the chance to be soft or vulnerable with someone. Especially not when he was already so sensitive about his looks and attitude. The thought of letting his guard down to be loved terrified him- what if they left? What if they made fun of him, too?
It was just too much for his fragile ego, so he brushed it aside and continued his hunt for treasure.
“Now where the hell am I?” He yelled, tilting the map in his hand left and right, as if that would somehow make his destination clearer. “Kinda crappy treasure map is this?”
He glared and shoved the map back in his pocket as he stomped around this town. He hadn’t ever bothered to come to this place before, so everything was new for him. He glared at the kids who were pointing at his nose to scare them off (mission accomplished), but his foul attitude still didn’t lessen.
As Buggy turned a corner, he accidentally rammed into someone. They shrieked, and his hat fell off his face and covered his eyes.
“Watch it, will ya? I’m walkin’ he…” he pushed his hat back up and came face to face with perhaps the most gorgeous person he’s ever met. His mouth was wide open, gawking at you as you gave an apologetic smile.
“Sorry. I didn’t see you there,” you said sheepishly.
“Y-yeah it’s… it’s cool. No biggie,” he mumbled in a daze.
“Are you alright?”
“Huh? Oh, yeah,” he returned to normal. “I mean, yeah, totally.”
You chuckle at his behavior, and something within Buggy’s chest makes it feel like there’s a million butterflies flapping inside his ribcage. He can’t help the dumb grin on his face as he laughs along.
“Sorry again, sir. I’ll keep an eye out for you next time,” you wink and begin walking away, making Buggy flabbergasted. N-next time? Was that a promise? He didn’t even realize what he was thinking before he turned around and tried to jog back to you.
“H-hey, wait up-!”
Beckman
Beckman was fairly ambivalent to the idea of a “soulmate” or “affinity”. Sure, he humored his often childish captain with those notions, but the fact was, Beckman was simply a sailor at heart. He didn’t think being “stuck” to someone was the life he wanted, and he was fairly sure a sane, rational person would not want to be the lover of a first mate to perhaps one of the most infamous pirate crews on the sea.
Now, this would imply you were sane and rational, and this would also imply that he was also not a sucker for you. Perhaps that was what made him attracted to you in the first place, or maybe it was something that gave him the idea that his captain wasn’t so off base.
When it came to you, Beckman was eager, a bit too eager, the others would joke. Whenever you called, he came running and answering like a loyal servant. Whenever you wrote, his lips would form a large smile while he refused to let the others look at the letter you sent. Whenever he was away from you for long periods of time, he drank a bit too much.
It was common place enough for the others to notice and tease him about, even if Beckman was adamant there was nothing there. You guys were just… friends, or something ambiguous like that. You didn’t need a label for your relationship. This was completely normal, you were normal, he was normal- nothing was out of the ordinary, so if they would please stop asking and make him confront those pesky feelings he-
Maybe he had a problem. He never felt this way for anyone else he encountered. You knew of his philandering, not seeming to care all that much, but damn it, even he couldn’t continue that streak because his mind would get occupied with you, you, you. Love was too complicated. Maybe this was the alcohol talking. Or Shanks getting in his head about “souls being attuned” or whatever spiritual jazz the red-haired captain would spout.
No, it really made sense, all things considered. There was no one else but you to make him quit fooling around with others on the islands he stopped at. There was no one else but you who invaded his thoughts, who plagued him day and night with those eyes, that smile, the way you hated that red cologne he once bought and-
Oh dear god, he was deep into this, wasn’t he?
Crocodile
Love? Spirits? Souls? Soulmates?
Yeah right, add that to the list of stupid things weak poets say to make their miserable lives have some meaning. You could jump through a million hoops to try and blame encounters and relationships on things like “destiny” or “fate”. To a man like Crocodile, however, “destiny” was just something he could control. Whether through bribes of money or through making them submit with his fearsome powers, “destiny” was nothing but another means of his affluence.
Only those who were weak and had nothing could not control their lives.
Something like love was a crutch used by those who had nothing to pretend they did. What was love to power? What was love to wealth? To fame? To greatness?
Love was the longest-running scam that Crocodile almost could be impressed with, if not for the fact that the sentiment around love made him want to gag.
Except, now he was actively looking for jewelry to buy you, flowers to deliver to your doorstep, and outfits to clothe you in for when you visited him.
It was almost disgusting how Crocodile was eagerly awaiting for your next arrival, for when he could be able to see you on the street or at his casino so he could see that face he adored so much. Those eyes that made him want to melt, that voice that echoed in his head, that smile that made him want to have an image of you adorned on his wall so he could always see it.
Something, he could never place what it was, drew him to you. Something made you seem to stand out to him in ways that no other could. He was Crocodile- world famous business man and pirate- he had no shortage of people throwing themselves at him or fearing him. Only to you was he trying his luck attempting to woo you to give him that look he loved. Only for you was he making excuse after excuse to continue seeing you, lying over and over that he had a reason to use you, that it was just a part of some master plan.
He exhaled another puff of his cigar and rubbed his temples.
Gods, why was he acting this way? He was Crocodile. Not a lovesick teenage boy, not some lonely man, not some simpering-
“Sir, (Y/n) has arrived.” His ears perked up as he quickly slicked back his hair.
“Is that so? Send them up,” he orders, grabbing his expensive cologne to spray onto him again.
Zoro
Zoro had never heard of the idea of soulmates or anything like that. When one lives, breathes, and dies by the sword, something like “soulmates” is just comical. He doesn’t need love to become the best swordsman. He didn’t need love to teach him how to pick up a sword and kill another with it. That was, in fact, the complete opposite of love.
Survival of the fittest, he thought. Nothing more, nothing less. You kill for bounties, bounties that pay, pay that gives you a chance to eat food. Nothing more to it. He never did more than he needed to, never worked harder for anything outside of his sword training and hunting. What else did a swordsman need to live?
He was currently drinking his fill at a local tavern of some random village he washed out upon. He didn’t care to get names, not when he was always moving, always killing, always leaving. “Zoro” was a passing chance encounter few got to ever meet or understand. He was fine with that. A bounty hunter didn’t need attachments. A bounty hunter definitely didn’t need someone weighing him down.
At the tavern, a few rowdy pirates were acting up. Yelling obscenities, throwing food and liquor at one another, making rude gestures- nothing out of the ordinary for drunk pirates. Zoro had no business with them, so he ignored them, continuing to order pint after pint.
It wasn’t until he heard a crash that he looked up. You were angrily yelling at one of the pirates who threw a drink at you, and his mates were drawing their weapons. It was clear you were outnumbered, so you looked around the bar for anyone that would help.
Normally, Zoro wouldn’t bother, figuring you dug your own grave by messing with pirates like that. However, when he glanced to your eyes, he found himself… staring. Lost. Entranced?
He didn’t know why he felt like he should protect you, but he always had a good intuition when it came to these sorts of things. He sighed, placed his mug down, then stood up, drawing his swords from their sheathes.
“Zoro,” he stated. A rare thing for him to admit so casually to a normal person. The pirates heard his name and shriveled up in fear. Zoro didn’t pay them any mind, instead tapping his sword against his shoulder impatiently. “Need me to shut these guys up?”
Mihawk
If you had asked a young Mihawk about love, he would have most certainly called you a fool for daring to think of such illogical things instead of focusing on one’s own strength and potential. While he had heard of the sentiments about love and soulmates before, he didn’t place much value into it. Love was a distraction from the training he could have done. Love was a waste of time. Love was just for weak-minded people who let themselves be vulnerable or gentle with another. Love wasn’t for people like him.
Which was why he was now trying to instill the opposite into his foolhardy protege, Zoro. Yes, yes, unfortunately, Mihawk was proven wrong from his earlier ways of thinking, and ever since then, he’s been doing his best to be a good man for you.
“I didn’t think a guy like you would have a partner…” Zoro would mumble.
“Of course I would. Do I not look like a suitable husband?” Mihawk replied as he was sipping his wine. “A marriage is only an aspect of your training and power.”
“How does cooking dinner help you train?” Zoro raised a brow, not believing a word.
“If you cannot handle a routine for even the most mundane and domestic of tasks, you cannot expect to be disciplined enough to train. If you think something like making your love a cup of tea or folding laundry is too hard or not worthy enough, you are not worthy enough to hold a sword.”
Zoro nodded, impressed by Mihawk’s reasoning (or maybe impressed at how you somehow made the world’s greatest swordsman so whipped and happy to make you dinner).
“Well, when you put it like that,” Zoro scratched his cheek, looking back at his mentor to see him staring at you longingly from the window. You and Perona were outside picking some of the vegetables at the garden, an activity you insisted upon doing despite Mihawk’s protests. You and the young lady were joking and laughing about something Perona said, and Mihawk sighed.
“Something wrong?” Zoro asked, unsure what Mihawk was thinking with his stoic appearance.
“No, not at all,” Mihawk shook his head, taking another sip.
“Then why did you sigh like that?” Zoro questioned. A smirk grew on Mihawk’s lips as he chuckled, continuing to look at you. You… you who were so special, who had become the apple of his eye, his strength, his joy, his passion.
“Oh, you wouldn’t understand it right now, my student,” Mihawk closed his eyes. “Fate is… it’s simply a humorous thing.”
Corazon
He always was a sensitive soul, despite his outer appearance and harsh exterior. But even as a child, Law could tell something was up with Corazon.
“Why are you always looking at them?” Law grumpily asked, folding his arms and raising a brow at his benefactor.
“Hm? At who?” Corazon dumbly responded, cigarette in his lips.
“You know who I mean! Don’t act stupid!” Law shouted. Corazon chuckled and exhaled the smoke.
“Sorry, gotta be more specific.”
Of course, Corazon knew who Law was referring to. It wasn’t like Corazon had hidden his affection for you, but that was for another time. You were something special, something that Corazon yearned for but could never have. Not when Doflamingo’s influence was so large and looming over his life. But even if Corazon himself could not love you so freely, he always did like to tell the young boy stories. Of course, Law, being a jaded little boy, had never really given thought to such things like “soulmates” or “souls knowing each other”. That was stupid and impossible.
Corazon liked to believe, though. It comforted him. It made him feel happy that, hey, even if this life perhaps didn’t work out for him and you, at least he had known you before. At least he was able to see you again. At least he got you in his life for a moment, even if it would end in nothing but heartache and pain. At he least, for just a bit, he got to see that smile, those eyes, and feel your hands over his.
It made his life a little less hard, a little less dull. The romanticism that despite Doffy meddling in his life, Corazon still had a chance with you, was meant to know and be with you… well, that was plenty enough for him. It made him happier, too, knowing Law was perhaps a soul he was acquainted with before. It made him feel like he was always going to be guaranteed love and kindness with you and Law, even if the world was unkind to him.
Yes, this new family he had found was perhaps where he belonged the most. With you and Law by his side, there was nothing more he could ask for.
Shanks
“You’re obsessed.”
“Am not!” Shanks yelled childishly at Beckman, before turning back to face the island they were planning on docking at soon. The wide smile on his face made it clear he was beyond excited to be there, and the other men chuckled.
“Don’t tell me you’re planning on running off to see em?” Yassop asked, knowing the answer.
“Oh, stop bugging about it! It’s just a little reunion with (Y/n), not anything crazy,” Shanks waved off. He breathed into his palm and winced at the smell of his breath. “Crap, does anyone have any mouthwash?”
“I don’t think anything can get that stench out. If they hadn’t run away cuz of your smell before, I think you’re good now!”
“Haha, very funny guys. Besides, it’s just between friends. Nothing weird.”
Of course, that was a bit of a fib, but who doesn’t tell little white lies? Surely he’d be forgiven for saying that by whomever was possibly in charge of making this happen?
Shanks, even with his overwhelming power and influence, did believe in superstition. It would be foolish not to, especially in such a dangerous world that a pirate inhabits. Sure, some of them were old wive’s tales from scared-straight sailors, but he did find them having some merit. He didn’t like to discount the seemingly impossible, not when it made even the most outlandish things possible.
He believed it was fate he got to meet Buggy and be a part of Roger’s crew. He believed it fate he met little Luffy in Foosha Village. He also believed it was fate he saved you that day. Some things just “made sense” like that to Shanks. It certainly made his life more interesting while also giving him a chance to bother you as always.
“Oh, come on, you can’t really kick out your soulmate, can you?” Shanks would tease.
“Soulmate?” You laugh. “Is this your attempt at proposing to me?”
“Hey, if you’d like it to be, I can absolutely make it happen,” Shanks replied, an earnest look in his eyes. You smile at him- crap, how do you always manage to make him ache and miss you? It’s gotta be fate, because no way could anyone have his heart in tight vice like this.
“Well… if you’re insisting, Captain,” you begin, smirking at him. “Why not take me with you? As your soulmate.”
Shanks’s eyes widened and the look on his face was a mixture of bewilderment and excitement.
“You know I can always make room for you,” he answered, trying to steady himself.
“Good. Although, we could share a room.”
“You drive a hard bargain, dear,” he chugs his rum. “Cheers to us!”
Law
Since he was a young boy, Law always tried to remain by himself. You couldn’t really trust anyone in a world of piracy and violence like that. Corazon, of course, always recommended otherwise. He even shared stories about a place where souls all were together.
It didn’t sound plausible or even remotely make sense. How would you even know if your soul was supposedly affiliated with someone?
It had been years since those days and the loss of Corazon, and even though he tried his hardest not to, Law still kept those stories in his mind. They were pointless and silly, but they were something Corazon believed wholeheartedly, even saying it was a miracle he got to meet a young Law. In some ways, Law felt somewhat similarly.
Love wasn’t for someone like Law. Too damaged, too cold, too logical, too afraid to ever let that feeling grow. It was how he stayed and remained for his life, and how he was planning on operating for the rest of time.
Until you, quite literally, crashed into him.
Jeez, you had to be a pest. Or a virus. Or a parasite. Something like that, but gosh, you were contagious. When you smiled, he found himself wanting to smile back. When you talked, he found himself thinking over every word you spoke in great detail. Maybe he was overthinking things, maybe when you said you were happy to have met him that was just you being friendly. Or something.
Almost always his mind drifted to you, feeling a certain way for you that he didn’t feel with the others in his crew or from the Straw Hats. You were different.
Perfect? Maybe. Definitely too good for someone like him, he’d think. But even with that self-loathing and apprehension, he found himself being drawn to you like a magnet.
Cora, if this is what you meant before…
Damn it, now he was letting things like soulmates and affinity cloud his judgment. He was a grown man, not a young boy, he didn’t need those silly delusions and ideas growing in his head and making him think he had a chance with you.
“Tora-o!” Luffy called. “Come here!!”
“No,” Law grumbled.
“Law,” you asked right after. “Do you mind helping me with this?”
“...yes,” he replied, stoically walking up to you to see what your problem was. Luffy gawked and pouted from the side, while a few of the others chuckled at Law.
#one piece#one piece x reader#one piece oneshots#x reader#reader insert#benn beckman x reader#benn beckman#shanks x reader#shanks#law x reader#trafalgar law#trafalgar law x reader#dracule mihawk x reader#mihawk#mihawk x reader#sir crocodile x reader#crocodile x reader#crocodile#rosinante corazon#corazon x reader#rosinante x reader#zoro x reader#roronoa zoro#buggy x reader#buggy the clown#op brook x reader#soul king brook x reader#soulmate au#roronoa zoro x reader#soul king brook
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FIRST LOVE
pairing : harry potter x weasley!reader
genre : fluff
warning : -
summary : harry potter has always noticed you, ron’s younger sister, but it’s only as time passes that he starts to develop feelings for you. determined to get closer, harry finds himself struggling, especially with other boys always around you.
harry didn’t believe in love at first sight. it was an idea that felt too dreamy, too far removed from his reality. but that was before he met you.
the first time harry noticed you wasn’t in any dramatic moment. it was simple, really. on the train to hogwarts, he’d just been looking out the window, lost in his own thoughts, when he noticed you sitting with ginny, laughing at something that had been said. the sound of your laughter caught his attention before anything else. you were warm, glowing, and there was an ease to the way you carried yourself that made harry’s heart beat a little faster.
he didn’t think much of it at first. after all, you were ron’s younger sister, and they were all just getting to know each other. but over time, his feelings grew.
it wasn’t just the way you smiled or the way your hair caught the light. it was how kind you were to everyone around you, how you made others feel seen and heard. harry found himself noticing the little things. like how you always had time to help someone with their homework or how you would slip off to the library when you needed a quiet moment, always finding the perfect books to recommend to others.
and it made harry realize just how special you were. how different you were from anyone else he’d met.
but how could he get close to you? how could he, the boy who was always in the shadow of his own fame and the weight of his destiny, break through the wall that seemed to exist between them?
so, harry did what he always did. he watched. he’d find himself sneaking peeks at you, listening to your conversations with ginny or luna, just wanting to understand you better. but every time he tried to speak to you, the words seemed to slip away. it was never the right time. there was always someone else there.
he began to ask ron more questions, though not directly. he'd bring up random things like how his sister was doing in classes, or if you had any big plans for the holidays, always steering the conversation back to you.
ron noticed. "why do you always ask about her?" he asked one evening, his tone a bit suspicious.
"i’m just curious," harry said quickly, but the blush creeping up his neck gave him away. "you know, y/n's really smart. i was just wondering how she does so well in everything."
ron, ever oblivious, shrugged. "she’s always been like that. don’t know how she manages it. but don’t get your hopes up, mate, she’s got plenty of blokes around her."
harry hadn’t really considered that. the idea of other boys showing interest in you made something in his chest tighten. he wasn’t sure what it was, but it made him uneasy. he tried to push it aside, telling himself that he wasn’t the jealous type. but the more he saw you with other guys, michael corner, dean thomas, even lee jordan, the more that tightness in his chest grew.
it was stupid. he was harry potter, the chosen one. why did this feel so difficult?
one day, harry pulled out the marauder’s map and quietly followed you, careful not to be noticed. he wasn’t stalking you. well, maybe just a little. but he was trying to figure out where you went when you had time to yourself. maybe then, when you were alone, he could finally find the courage to speak to you.
he checked the map. you were in the great hall, sitting with the weasleys for dinner. harry’s heart skipped a beat.
he made his way there, trying to keep his steps quiet, hoping you wouldn’t notice him. but as he entered, he immediately spotted you. sitting with ginny, fred, george, and ron, laughing over something, her face glowing in the warm light. harry couldn’t help it. he found himself smiling. in fact, he was so lost in watching you that he didn’t notice ron glaring at him from the other side of the table.
"mate," ron’s voice suddenly cut through his daydream, "what are you doing?"
harry blinked and quickly wiped the goofy smile off his face. "what? nothing."
ron raised an eyebrow, glancing at you across the table. "you’re staring at my sister. again."
"no, i’m not," harry quickly muttered, avoiding eye contact. but it was too late. ron had already noticed.
"you’ve been doing that all evening," ron continued, his tone half teasing, half annoyed. "just... stop it. it’s creepy."
harry flushed, suddenly embarrassed. "i wasn’t... i didn’t mean to..." his voice trailed off. he had no idea how to explain why he was so interested in you without sounding like a fool.
ron just rolled his eyes. "she’s got a lot of attention already, harry. you know that. and she’s not interested in you like that, so don’t get your hopes up."
harry’s heart sank. "i wasn’t. i’m just... i just wanted to know how she’s doing. as a friend."
ron gave him a long look, his expression unreadable. "yeah, sure," he said with a shrug, returning to his food. but harry could tell that ron didn’t quite believe him.
a few weeks later, harry was invited to the burrow for the holidays, and after a day spent helping mrs. weasley in the kitchen, harry found himself wandering upstairs to your room. he knocked softly at the door.
"come in," you told him to, from the inside.
harry pushed the door open, his heart thumping as he saw you sitting by the window, a book in your hands. you looked up and smiled when you saw him. "hey, harry. what’s up?"
"just thought I’d come see how you were doing," harry said with a casual shrug, walking in and sitting on the edge of your bed.
"doing good," you replied, placing your book down. "busy with all the holiday stuff."
they started chatting, mostly small talk at first. it was easy. harry felt like he could just be himself around you. your presence was calming, like nothing else mattered when they were together.
as their conversation went on, harry found his gaze drifting to your lips. he didn’t want to rush things, but it felt like the moment was right. without thinking, he leaned in, his breath mingling with hers. you didn’t pull away.
the kiss was slow, gentle, the tension between them building. harry’s hand gently cupped your face as he deepened the kiss. he could feel your hands on his chest, pulling him closer. it was everything he had imagined and more.
but before either of them could process what was happening, the door flew open.
"blimey, harry," fred exclaimed, poking his head in, followed by george, both wearing mischievous grins. "we leave you alone for five minutes, and.."
"you two are unbelievable," george added, shaking his head.
harry and you pulled away quickly, both flushed and trying to hide their smiles. "you’re not supposed to be here!" you protested, laughing nervously.
fred and george just laughed, exchanging glances. "oh, we know," fred said. "but it’s too funny to miss."
harry’s face went red, and you laughed, your eyes sparkling with amusement. it wasn’t exactly how he had imagined their first kiss, but at least he had finally made it happen.
and maybe, just maybe, it was worth the wait.
#harry potter#harry potter fluff#xreader#hp x you#fluff#gryffindor#hp fanfic#hp x reader#gryffindor boys#hp imagine#harry x reader#harry potter imagine#harry potter fanfiction#harry potter x you#harry potter x reader#hp fandom#harry james potter#golden trio era#harry fluff#harry james potter x y/n#harry james potter x reader#harry james potter fluff#harry james potter imagine
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Mini PAC n° 2: 3 things to happen in the next 3 days.
Pile 1 - Pile 2
Pile 3 - Pile 4
You can pick more than one! Just follow your heart!
What will happen in the next 72 hours of whenever you find this reading?
*This is a source of entertainment, your destiny is in your hands.*
Pile 1
1 - Nine of Cups , Wheel of Fortune , Seven of Cups. Garden , Clover , Coffin. - LION: Time to act.
2 - The Star , Four of Swords , Three of Swords. Ring , Child , Fox. - BOOT: Increase your efforts if you want to achieve your goals.
3 - Ace of Wands , Six of Pentacles , Two of Pentacles. Clover , Garden , Letter. - LILY: Spiritual love.
You will take action regarding a wish of yours or something you have been only thinking of doing for a good while; you will take action. There will be the right place or opportunity, or simply, the time is now because it is. I believe it's you putting an end to a situation. It can be the end of a relationship, but I feel more that it’s you actively putting an end to a feeling or a situation so you can move on. This is a deliberate move of yours; you do it willingly, and it will bring more luck into your life.
You had expectations that something would happen, or high hopes for an outcome, but it will be postponed or you won't hear back from a person, until you realize this promise was false or that it won't be as you expected it to be. You are disappointed by this, but maybe more so by a person who made you a promise that they could make something work, but they didn’t do their part of the agreement. You may feel like you were taken for a fool or someone sees you as naive. I don’t think it’s a big matter, though. I think it’s work-related or related to something in your studies where someone said they'd give you their part of the work but didn’t. I don’t see it as a big disappointment in a close connection. But someone will let you down regarding something.
The first and second events may be related, but they could also be about different situations (I feel it's two different things).
Despite this previous event, you will feel better when you receive an invitation to a place you didn’t think you could be invited to. Maybe you needed a ticket to get in, and a friend will give it to you. A good person will do something nice for you, and you know their intentions are pure.
☆.。.:*・°☆.。.:*・°☆.。.:*・°☆.。.:*・°☆
Pile 2
1 - Page of Pentacles , The Hanged Man , Two of Swords. Tower , Bear , Scythe. - DESK: Pay attention to your work.
2 - Six of Wands , Temperance , King of Pentacles. Heart , Letter , Coffin. - TEARDROPS: Great personal sorrow.
3 - Justice , Wheel of Fortune , Seven of Pentacles. Stars , Rider , Child. - COINS: Money will be coming to you.
You may say "no" to your boss or to someone who wants you to do something for them because you already have a lot to do. You will prioritize yourself and your tasks, no matter how high up the other person is. You may fear you will fall sick because of your work. Maybe your boss will take leave or give you extra responsibility temporarily, and it can be heavy on you for the next three days. For some, your boss/an authority/an institution may say they cannot meet you or talk to you now, and you'll have to wait.
You may receive the closure you want from a past relationship. If you want to break up with someone, it’s a good time to resolve it peacefully. There is both a sense of victory, maturity, and spiritual intervention, so this closing of a connection will feel good.
Work-wise, you may receive the news of a raise or a change in position that was long earned and well-deserved. An offer of a prosperous new beginning for you; it will be long-lasting as well. It may not start immediately, but you will spot this opportunity.
☆.。.:*・°☆.。.:*・°☆.。.:*・°☆.。.:*・°☆
Pile 3
1 - The Lovers , Knight of Swords , Seven of Swords. Birds , Dog , Sun. - KNOT: Unsuccessful plans.
2 - Two of Pentacles , Two of Wands , Page of Cups. . Snake , Child , Ship. - LEG: Stepping into a new experience.
3 - The World , The Tower , Page of Wands. Key , Ship , Dog. - CLOUDS: Temporary problems.
If you have something scheduled with a friend in the next three days for leisure and fun, know that your friend is truthful to you, but your plans may be postponed, or the person may be delayed when arriving.
You will start something new that will make you feel like an adult, that you're growing, or simply makes you realize you've come far in your personal transformation. It may be related to a new job, new place of study, a solo trip, or going abroad to study. These themes are favored in the next 72 hours.
Related to the previous message, I think anything that was blocking it will be removed, and this new thing will come to you. A helpful person will help fix it; don’t worry. You will have support during a meaningful transition phase in your life. You will also feel free.
☆.。.:*・°☆.。.:*・°☆.。.:*・°☆.。.:*・°☆
Pile 4
1- Three of Swords , Page of Wands , Judgement. House , Sun , Birds. - DARK WOMAN: Dealings or relationship with a woman with dark complexion or hair.
2 - The Fool , Four of Wands , Eight of Cups. Tower , Heart , Book. - DIAMOND: Gift of jewelry.
3 - Three of Cups , The Sun , Ten of Swords. Birds , Man , Fox. - TARGET: Goal-oriented person.
You will make peace with your mother or a family member. For some, it can be reconciliation with a friend, but I think the person is older than you. A boss is more likely than a friend. For fewer of you, your family will be supportive and make you see things about a relationship that only brought you pain, and now you’ll make a decision to move on with their support. For most people, I just see reconciliation.
Someone will make a sweet gesture toward you and reveal their feelings for you. It is not a love confession, but an action or token of affection that shows sentiment—maybe more sentiment than you thought existed. This will make you let go of an old situation or person that no longer suits you. Maybe this gesture from the person will remind you of your worth.
For some, after some realization, you will let go of the past—let go of someone who doesn’t open up about their feelings, even if it is a peaceful and stagnant relationship—and you will move on from that. You may read or see things online that give you insights into your sentiments and help you deal with your emotions.
You will hear gossip or third-party confirmation about someone's true intentions. You will end a fling or flirting situation to chase your goals.
You may say "no" to your friends so you can attend to work matters or study.
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(Dark!) Robb Stark as a husband
Pairing: Dark Robb Stark x (female) Reader
▶ This is a yandere/dark work and it may contain triggering content so please READ THE WARNINGS before. Do not read if minor.
More at Masterlist
SCENARIO: How Robb Stark is as a husband.
WARNINGS: Toxic Marriage.
Please, reblog and give me feedback.
A little treat cause tomorrow college starts and I'm nervous :) hope you guys like it.
--
Robb married you for duty but he fell for you in the most passionable way there is.
How smithen he is by you soon becomes obvious, not just by you but even to his family. His siblings taking great pleasure in teasing him for being so whipped for you already.
It’s endearing to have such a handsome, kind spouse and you couldn’t be any happier, thanking the gods for granting you such a fortunate destiny, one that not many women receive.
Not only did you receive a wonderful husband but also supportive in-laws.
Life is nice.
A good husband, a caring family, you have food in your belly and a warm castle to live in. What else could you possibly ask for?
Each day you fell deeper for Robb, your heart content with the love that quickly blossomed between you two.
Maybe that’s why you remained blind for so long.
Robb's devotion quickly becomes overbearing, completely enraptured by you. Your love for him doesn’t allow you to see it clearly but there are few instances that leave a bitter memory.
Like when Theon hugged you out of contentment. It was a brotherly gesture, no lust behind it yet it didn’t stop Robb from landing his fist in the poor man’s face. The guilt you felt as Theon’s eye bruised into a black eye in the following days had eaten you away.
Peace was soon restored, Eddard Stark would never allow the boys to remain upset with each other, but it bothered you that a simple touch could arise such an angry reaction from your gentle husband.
You remember it when you had difficulty adjusting to the freezing winter and the constant snow, you asked Robb if you could visit your parents. Only for a few days, you assured him.
You felt homesick so seeing your family and the warm weather from your hometown would definitely cheer you. Your wishes were left unattended, an apologetic kiss being pressed to your temple as innumerous apologies come out of his lips.
He couldn’t leave Winterfell at the time being.
His family needed him.
He had too many responsibilities at that time.
Robb promised you that he would take you there one day but that’s a promise that never came to fruition.
The mantle of ignorance slowly starts to disappear as the months drag by, the realization that Robb wasn’t nearly as perfect as you painted him to be.
Constantly hovering by your side, keeping an attentive eye on who you talk to, restraining the places you’re allowed to go. The lack of privacy and power gradually bothers you more and more, feeling yourself getting smothered by your husband’s protectiveness.
His family notices it, his protective behavior. But all of their reasonings and pleas fall under deaf ears.
Robb doesn’t listen to them.
He does what’s best for you, without needing the meddling of his parents. He knows what’s best for your marriage, not them.
And right now, Robb thinks what it needs is something to reignite the flame of love between you, just like it was when you married him, less than a year ago.
He does need an heir, after all.
#@mrsdarkandyandere7#robb stark x reader#dark game of thrones#dark got#robb stark imagine#dark!robb stark#dark robb stark#dark!robb stark x reader#dark robb stark x reader#tw: toxic marriage#tw: dark content#tw.dark content#yandere x reader#game of thrones x reader#game of thrones imagine#yandere robb stark
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Destiny (m)
synopsis. You can’t say no to him, it’s his birthday after all.
warnings. söft yändērē, sïmp bëhävïöür, öbsëssîvë thoughts, öbsëssïön, hê ïs sö përsüäsïvë, ünhëälthy rëlätïönshïp, yändêrê jk 10x.
note. HAPPY BIRTHDAY TO THE MAN I LOVE. please send asks for my jk’s, what do you love the most about jk? I love him, I hope you guys will love this as well, so what’s your answer going to be?
He just loves you so much.
Jungkook knows it’s unhealthy but he doesn’t care. You are everything to him, you’re his reason for everything, you’re the centre of his universe.
He wants to be with you forever, you’re both perfect for each other, God made you for him, and him for you.
Jungkook is a firm believer in destiny and he believes that you’re his destiny.
So that’s why he’s going to make you his tonight, forever.
You are nervous,
When it comes to your boyfriend you’re always tense.
You want to be happy, excited for your date tonight with him but all you feel is nervous, maybe it’s because you’re not sure about how he’s going to react to what you’re about to tell him.
Jungkook was always unpredictable.
As you sit right across him, you feel his eyes on you, you can’t really look at him without looking away, or playing with your nails. Your anxiety is rising through the roof.
Maybe you shouldn’t today, it’s his birthday after all, but it’s really now or never. Your courage is barely enough today, you’ll chicken out the next day.
“Baby? You okay?”
The feeling of his right tattooed hand on yours and his voice pulls you out of your inner dilemma, you blink twice, he looks so happy and beautiful. His eyes are filled with love for you, he looks at you like you’re his whole world.
And that scares you a little.
You nod to jungkook and he squeezes your hand again. “Just thinking about you, kook.” You reply, the night is so calm, the atmosphere is so peaceful yet Jungkook’s eyes don’t let you calm down.
“The food was so delicious right YN???? Also I ordered their top desert too, I hope you’ll enjoy it! I know we have my birthday cake too but I thought you should taste their special too, it’s so tasty I love it.”
“I am so happy I am spending my birthday with you YN.” The man gushes like a teen boy, never leaving your hand, “you know I love you a lot, so much.” He sighs like this is a dream he never wants to wake up from.
“You love me too right?”
Your breath hitches in your throat, why does he always ask you this question? His need to be reassured drives you insane sometimes, he knows the answer yet why?
“Of course.”
A huge smiles breaks out from his lips, his eyes crinkle so sweetly, his cheeks are almost red, your boyfriend blushes softly and giggles.
“Then, you’re going to love my surprise YN.”
Your furrow your brows.
“Actually Jungkook I need to tell- no YN. Not now please.” You close your mouth, anxiety rushes through you as you watch him stand up from the table, what is he doing?
You don’t get it, it’s his birthday yet he’s giving you a surprise? 
Your eyes follow his as you watch him walk closer to you and you are too focused on him to utter a word, he looks at you and halts his movement, looking at you with his deep brown orbs.
“B-Babe what are you doing??”
It’s all too quick, he’s on one knee, as he puts his hand into his pocket, and takes out a velvet black box. Your heartbeat is going crazy.
No no no!!!
“JUNGKOOK!- YN. Will you make me the luckiest man alive, will you marry me?”
You can’t breathe, it feels so suffocating suddenly, his words hit you like a brick, ringing repeatedly in your ears. You want to cry.
You didn’t want this, not right now.
You stare at him dumbfounded, your mouth feels too dry to say anything, Jungkook stares back at you with eagerness jumping in his eyes, they are sparkling so much.
You watch as he openes the box, the ring takes your attention away from him, it’s gorgeous, it’s too big.
It looks too expensive.
“YN do you see the ring? I had it custom made, do you see these stones? These are yours and mine birth stones, and the diamond is in the middle of them. Do you like it?”
You stand up, speechless, “J-Jungkook….” He doesn’t move from his position, “please say yes YN. I want to spend the rest of my life with you. I love you so much, please fulfill my birthday wish and marry me.”
You feel so helpless right now, he’s making you feel so weak, the look in his eyes is too strong. He loves you so much.
“I’ll make you the happiest woman YN, I’ll always take care of you and love you unconditionally, please baby, marry me.”
Jungkook is quick to grab your hand. “Baby say something, you know you can’t say no, I won’t accept it, say yes, say yes to me.”
this is exactly why you don’t want to marry him.
“I…I…”
“Just one yes YN, I’ll do anything… please marry me.”
#jungkook smut#bts smut#jungkook x reader#yandere bts#yandere jungkook#yandere x reader#yandere x you#yandere jjk#jjk smut#yandere smut#smut#jungkook x yn#jungkook ff#jungkook fanfic#jungkook fanfiction#jeongguk x reader#jeongguk smut#bts yandere#yandere kpop#jungkook fluff#jungkook au#jungkook angst
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Are Katara stans more likely to become Zutara?
To be fair: I also saw Kataangers, other- or non-shippers who care at least a little about Katara and did complain about the nerfing of her character. But still…maybe it is because of the communities I visit, but it appears to me that most Katara stans are more likely to become Zutara.
The reason I prefer this ship is that I’ve become a Katara stan first. I love every side of her, the loud one precisely, when she stands up for her ideals. And, as for Zutara: There is a deep understanding of each other’s needs along with mutual respect and a special bond those two share with no one else in the Gaang. They are equals—Zuko respects, accepts and loves Katara as a whole, and the same goes the other way around (canon-platonically or headcanon/ship-baiting-romantically doesn’t matter).
So, here’s what I don’t understand: if someone ships, I would assume they care about both characters and how they fit with each other. Yet, I’ve seen many Kataangers care only about Aang: What Aang wants. What his intensions are. That he is just flawed when he kisses Katara without consent…never how Katara feels about his actions, never how she is presented at the end of the OG, in the comics and in Korra.
Regarding The Southern Raiders in this case: I truly believe that Aang just wants to help, as many Kataangers argue in defense of his behavior. The teachings of the monks helped him during his dark times, plus, he is just a kid. He panicked, bc he thought Katara would follow the same dark path, and didn’t know how to express his worries. However, this is also my point against Kataang: He is just a kid. He still has so much to learn before even thinking about a serious relationship; especially with Katara whom he still sees through rose-tinted glasses—including that forgiveness to receive closure is not the right path for everyone.
If you mention this to some Kataangers, even very carefully, they immediately become defensive, saying that it’s just about making Zutara look better and demonizing Aang. And don’t get me started on the kiss by the end. 🙄 I’ve never read anything from them beyond “Katara is clearly happy.” But what makes you think she is happy? No explanation. People who agree with me, showing that they care about Katara, are mostly Zutara- or non-shippers.
Me, on the other hand: I can easily say that Katara has every right to hold a grudge against Zuko after The Crossroads of Destiny, bc he wronged her the most. Totally understandable that he had to go the extra mile with her to receive her forgiveness. I won’t sugar coat his actions to make him or Zutara look better, so much for their complaints—that isn’t necessary anyway. The difference: Zuko stood up for his mistakes, helps Katara to find her closure without asking for forgiveness, even if that is what he hopes. Let’s not forget how she opens up to him, even during this process; more than she did to anyone else.
Aang’s mistakes weren’t that huge, and it would take a scene of maybe a minute or two to truly show the regret of his actions towards Katara.
I believe that if you care about a character like Katara with such huge beliefs and intensions to create a better world, you wouldn’t be okay with reducing her to nothing more than an attachment whose world revolves around her boyfriend/husband—or her sweetie *ugh*. Yet, some Aang-stans seem not to care about this side of Katara and really consider her happy when her life is nothing more than pampering her partner.
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🐚 Message you are meant to hear right now. 🐚
“Carry me into the infinite night. Beyond all earthly limit.”
- Rabindranath Tagore
Masterlist
: ・ෆ・┈・┈・ᕱ⑅ᕱ・┈・┈・ෆ・ : ✦ : ・ෆ・┈・┈・ᕱ⑅ᕱ・┈・┈・ෆ・ :
Pile 1
I get the idea that there is a new direction that you are wanting to take your life into. A new passion or dream that you want to follow. I feel like you’ve been wanting this for a while, but didn’t feel confident enough to persue it. Your energy now feels very optimistic and motivated. This is something that you are really passionate about and have been dreaming about for a while.
I feel like that you are in a very secure place right now that gives you the opportunity to explore this new venture. I feel like there is a lot of support available for you if you might need it. This new direction will bring more abundance and prosperity into your life. It will allow you to be more at ease and to feel more comfort. I do think this process will take a while, but you’re probably already aware of this. This is something that you need to built slowly over time.
It might feel a bit risky and I think that you sometimes worry about the future because you are not exactly sure about how your dream will manifest. The best thing is to trust the universe and to embrace the unknown. I get the strong message that you should really continue to pursue this, because it will be so worth it in the end.
This new direction feels very inline with your destiny and purpose.
: ・ෆ・┈・┈・ᕱ⑅ᕱ・┈・┈・ෆ・ : ✦ : ・ෆ・┈・┈・ᕱ⑅ᕱ・┈・┈・ෆ・ :
Pile 2
I feel like you are in a phase of learning and growth. You are very focused on yourself, but not in a narcissistic way. You are trying to improve your life and to become more confident. I think your goal is to become more attractive and magnetic and to overall just be the best version of yourself. A lot of this is happening subconsciously. I feel like you are doing a lot of inner work to improve and better yourself. You are really putting in the work of analyzing your behavior and trying to understand why you are the way you are. This is really good because as you heal yourself and become more balanced, this will reflect itself on your physical body and outer world. Your internal and outer state are very much linked to each other. So as you become more harmonious internally this will mirror itself in your material reality as well.
I feel like you’ve already made a lot of progress. You are a lot more emotionally balanced than you were in the past. You have a lot more control over your emotions now and I feel like this is allowing you to tap into your intuition and to trust the universe more.
I feel like the message overall is to just keep going because the more you work on yourself the more abundant you’ll be in every aspect of your life.
: ・ෆ・┈・┈・ᕱ⑅ᕱ・┈・┈・ෆ・ : ✦ : ・ෆ・┈・┈・ᕱ⑅ᕱ・┈・┈・ෆ・ :
Pile 3
I feel like you are in a time of exploration and forward thinking, focusing on growth and expansion. There is a surge of optimism and a desire for fulfillment driving you forward. The plans you had are now in motion. You can expect success and growth.
There is a very strong focus on the future and the potential that lies there. But at the same time, I feel like there is a message of going within. There is a need for inner reflection and introspection in regards to the past and your childhood specifically. I feel like there are some emotional blockages that could be holding you back that stem from past memories.
It’s important now to seek solitude, so that you can spend some time with your inner child. I feel like there is a lot that your inner child wants to communicate with you, and there is a lot that you could learn. This is a time to be vulnerable and it’s important that you are really honest and open with yourself, so you can go very deep within. I feel like you might think that you already know yourself well or that you’ve already done this period of introspection in the past, but I’m getting the message that there are still some aspects of you that you are unaware off. It’s necessary now to explore and face these sides to you, so you can have more understanding of who you really are. Its important to remember that healing and growth don’t happen in a linear way.
By taking this time away and focusing on your inner development, it will really help you in your journey going forward. It will give you more clarity and ultimately more wisdom and make you feel more empowered.
: ・ෆ・┈・┈・ᕱ⑅ᕱ・┈・┈・ෆ・ : ✦ : ・ෆ・┈・┈・ᕱ⑅ᕱ・┈・┈・ෆ・ :
Thank you for reading my tarot message. I would love to know if this resonated. 🩵
#divination#free tarot#pac reading#pick a card#pick a photo#pick a pile#tarot#tarot cards#tarot reading#tarotblr#spirituality#tarotcommunity#tarot witch#tarot readers of tumblr#divinity#spiritualgrowth#spiritual journey#spiritual development
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SOULMATE
Lando Norris x Reader F1 as romance tropes Masterlist
If anyone asked Lando always knew he was going to be an F1 driver. It was his dream, his destiny. Not the words imprinted on his arm.
“At least he’s an F1 driver” were the words that appeared on his 16th birthday. At first, he was ecstatic it was proof not only he had a soulmate but he achieved his dreams. It wasn’t until he’d been at McLaren for a few years the words almost haunted him seeing the other drivers meet theirs and he was still walking down the paddock alone, well almost.
“At least you’ll know immediately when you meet her, mine says “hello” that could be anyone!” His best friend Max spoke seeing the dark look in Landos eyes watching Alex and Lily.
Lando scoffed shaking it off “And she'll only care that I’m a driver not about me.” That was the problem the longer you took to meet the worse his thoughts got.
“You don’t know that, she might just think you’re stupid,” at his friends' words Lando turned to glare at him who held his hands in surrender, “You say stupid stuff sometimes”
“You’re not helping you know.” Anything else Lando wanted to say got cut off by a new visitor.
“How’s it going gents, wait Lando what’s with the murder face?” George spoke as he joined the two men, the black Mercedes race suit a stark contrast with the orange of Landos.
“Lando is pouting watching the happy couple over there.” Max's thumb jutting over his shoulder towards the Williams garage and the other British driver understood while Lando tried to look anywhere but the the man now looking at him with pity
George knew how he felt, he felt like half of himself before he met Carmen. “Carmen has a friend in town for the race Lewis and I were going to all go to dinner why don't you come along and get out of your head for a while”
“Appreciate the offer mate but I don't think being a fifth wheel sounds that fun.”
“Lewis had a last-minute meeting he can’t make it now, you should come so Y/n isn’t lonely” lies George spoke before he thought, Carmen would kill him for this.
“He would love to text him the time and place! See you later George.”
Max shoved his friend who was silently thinking of an excuse so he could go home and drown himself in his sorrows so he was ready to go for the race.
“I'm not going,” Lando spoke as soon as they were alone and started walking again towards McLaren hospitality and into his drivers' room
“No, you’re not going home to sulk this dinner will be good for you, get out and socialize.”
“I don't need to socialize I’m fine where I am” the driver huffed stuffing his clothes into his bag ignoring the look his friend was giving.
“You like George and food this seems like a win-win to me!” Max spoke trying to convince him “And maybe the friend is hot plus you need to get out of this funk it’s depressing now go home and shave that god-awful goate and make yourself presentable”
Ignoring in insult Lando swung his bag over his shoulder and caved.
“Fine I’ll go but only to get as drunk as I can on George's tab” and maybe his friends were right and an easy night out would soothe the ache in his chest.
“I am so glad you’re finally here I’ve only been begging to get you at a race for years!” Carmen exclaimed from her spot on your bed while you picked through your suitcase for something the wear.
“Well this might be my last chance to meet Lewis so I figured I'd take it.” You joked, flashing the 44 hat you brought for the race waving it like a flag as she rolled her eyes at your behavior.
“Better not wear that to the garage George might feel offended.” Carmen sang a smile on her face showing she didn’t mean it
“Listen I love George but just like with Toto Lewis is first in my heart George second.” You laughed dodging the pillow she flung at you.
“Alright come on George will be here soon we can wait downstairs.” Grabbing her bag you followed behind her making small talk as you both waited for the Mercedes to pull up
You fake gagged as George immediately jumped you to open your friends' door with a kiss. “Y/n always a pleasure good to see you again.” He said giving her a quick hug while opening the back door for her to get in the car. Returning the sentiment
“I wonder if they have any shawarma at the restaurant” your friend spoke you could hear the smile in her voice as she teased you obviously payback for your comment earlier.
“Oh wow, that joke still hasn’t gotten old.” You deadpanned making George look at the both of you in confusion not getting the inside joke of your soulmate's words.
Choosing to change the subject you felt excitement filling you the closer to your destination you got
“George I cannot thank you enough for setting this up it’s a dream come true I’ve been watching Lewis race for years!” You smiled while Carmen laughed
“She’s been geeking out over meeting Lewis” she spoke as her boyfriend’s shoulders stiffened.
“Well about that….Lewis had a meeting but don’t worry I already took care of it everything is fine and I promise I’ll introduce you tomorrow.” He rushed out white knuckling the steering wheel as you deflated, you were disappointed but it wasn’t his fault.
“Who’d you invite?” You asked before he could answer he was already parked, he turned in his seat looking back at you.
“We’ve been friends forever… I’m sure it will be fine” You would’ve had more confidence if he didn't pause and have such a nervous smile on his face
Lando who was leaned against the building next to the entrance he’s pretty sure he’s accidentally scared off a few couples from entering with his brooding. He glances up hearing a car pull up his back suddenly straightened as if he was struck by lightning when the back car door opened.
His feet moved faster than his brain as he rushed to hold a hand out helping you out of the car.
A soft smile slid across his face uncharacteristically for his recent mood, but before he could dwell on it he locked eyes with you.
Shyly taking the offered hand you got out of the car slightly shocked by the turn of events not having expected George's friend to behave like that.
“Hi, I’m Y/N nice to meet you.” You spoke looking into a pair of awestruck brown eyes. “Umm hello?”
“Lando!” George shouted when you looked around the group when the other Brit failed to respond in choice of staring
“Lando yeah I’m Lando hi.” The man rushed out then mentally kicked himself when you nodded with a smile that made his mind go black again as you walked ahead with Carmen.
“Mate, what was that?” George spoke staring at the fellow driver whose face was covered with his hands “I don't know….” He groaned.
When they entered the restaurant you and Carmen were already seated Lando ungracefully jumped to the empty seat in front of you as if someone else would take it. Huffing out a smirk when you looked up at the sudden noise.
“Y/n this is Lando he drives for McLaren we grew up karting together along with Alex,” at the mention of Alex, Lando recalled the scene from that morning at deflated back into his seat.
“Nice to meet you I haven’t met to many of the grid yet so I’m glad to have started small.” You smiled across the table, still slightly in a mood he just politely nodded back
“You went golfing with Lily a few months ago didn't you?” George asked hoping to spark Landos' interest which worked flawlessly as the man perked back up.
“You like golf? I played in a tournament with the PGA guys for Netflix”
Out of all the things he had to brag about the Netflix cup is what he chose, god, Max was right he does say stupid stuff sometimes.
“You must be pretty good.” If Lando wasn’t proud of his previous answer his next one wasn’t any better. “Oh yeah, practically just hole-in-ones.” He smiled ignoring the look from the other driver, who tried to subtly yank on his sleeve to get his attention away from the two women who were giggling at his poor attempts at impressing you.
“Anyone who’s played golf with you knows that a lie pull yourself together” George spoke his tone hushed “I’m trying I don't know what’s wrong.”
The two men straightened up as if their little conversation never happened and looked over the menus. Lando who was reading over every sentence trying to collect himself.
“What in the world what is chicken shar-sharwarma chicken shar warma.” Lando stutters out thinking it was surely a typo.
George slammed his menu down on the table and looked over at Lando with the most disappointment he had ever seen on his face.
“What did I just say to you!”
“I’m sorry it’s confusing!”
“Chicken shawarma Lando it is not hard if you can’t say it don't order it!” George barked any rebuttal Lando had gets cut off by Carmens' loud gasp. Making both men turn.
“Oh my god!”
“I know he's a muppet” George who thought she was baffled by his friend just waved it off and went to change the subject before you spoke
“At least he's an F1 driver” Lando froze at your words swearing he felt a tingle on his arm where those very words sat. “Oh my god!” Carmen squealed in excitement at what she was witnessing.
“Plus he's pretty.” You lightly spoke still in shock at finding your soulmate who whined “See why wasn’t that part on there.” Lando threw his hands in the air wishing that’s what he stared at for years.
“Wait you think I’m pretty?” He smirked snapping back into the personality he was known for. His question made a flush appear on your cheeks and Lando is sure he just fell in love harder at the sight.
“Can someone tell me what’s happening?” George demanded seeing his girlfriend tear up and you and Lando doing whatever it was you two were doing.
Lando still on a high leaned his arm on the table rolling his white button-down sleeve to his elbow revealing the words you spoke, not taking his eyes off you the entire time.
“That George, was me meeting my girl.”
The rest of the dinner passed by in a whirlwind, all you could remember was the feeling of meeting your soulmate you never thought you’d say this but you’re glad Lewis had a work obligation or you wouldn’t be walking down the paddock hand and hand with Lando a brand new McLaren hat on your head.
“I’m still upset you threw my hat across the room.” Your words did little to dim the smile on his face, glancing at you from the corner of his eye.
“I’m sorry love, would a first-place trophy make it better?” He boasted feeling as if he was on top of the world with you by his side.
“Oh big ambitions today, huh, feeling good?”
“With you here, babe I'll be unstoppable, and once I win you have to throw out that dreadful hat I’m the only British driver allowed in your heart now.” He declared, his hand sliding down your arm to grab yours. Pulling you to a stop outside his garage.
“There’s the happy couple!” A new voice shouted from the sea of papaya. Max ran out, making Lando roll his eyes and you smile. You spent the last two days glued to each other so you knew all about his best friend.
“Finally so nice to meet you thank you for showing up and fixing this muppet!”
“I wasn’t a muppet, you muppet!”
“It’s very nice to meet you as well Max.” You interrupted the two before they could get started on the back and forth. Landos attention switching as you spoke threw his arm over your shoulder, a smug expression on his face getting to show you off.
“I know what lover boys words were but what was yours?” Max ashed almost bouncing on his feet in excitement. Lando groans immediately holding his head in your neck.
Rubbing your hand through his curls knowing this was going to be rough on him, you showed Max your other arm. “Mate you wonder why I said she probably thought you were stupid!”
Lando felt your head nodding in agreement making his shoot up to pout at you. “I’m sorry but come on it wasn’t your best moment neither was spilling wine all over the table.”
“He spilled wine! Come tell me everything.” Max gasped, pulling you away from Lando lacing your arm with his leading you down the paddock. Leaving the driver to trail behind the two.
A year later.
A hand came into your view as the car door swung open revealing your fiancé.
“For old times sake huh?” you teased refusing to the time he nearly tripped over himself to get to your door the night you met. Lando fondly rolled his eyes. “You act like I don't always get the door for you.” He bowed exaggeratedly pulling the large glass door open leading to the restaurant.
“Like how you acted like you were a golf expert?” Lando's jaw drooped in mock offense before collecting himself pulling you closer to whisper in your ear.
“Got a hole-in-one with you though didn't I?” You giggled hitting his chest as you reached the table. Lando left to greet George while you sat with Carmen and caught up.
Eventually, the men joined you both again, you only noticed when your chair was dragged to your right until you were pressed against Landos side, who held a menu for you to share. You smiled at his determination to keep you close.
Squeezing your arm which you now knew as his ‘watch this’ motion he winked.
“I think I’ll have the chicken shaworma chicken shar warma!”
“Mate not again!” George groaned while Lando laughed in mirth. Looking around the restaurant hasn’t changed a bit since the last time you were here and yet your entire life had, you now travel with your best friend around the world, and most importantly, found your soulmate
Hey guys we are back! After a very long break i got inspired to write again and while this one isn’t the best the other parts of this series are some of my favorites I’ve written so go check them out here but i do hope you all liked it
<< Charles Leclerc as brothers best friend
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