#so that's everybody else's problem now
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babsaros · 9 months ago
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hey. when cis society is oppressing a trans man, what he is experiencing is. In Fact. misogyny. i'm sorry i know none of us like to be reminded of our agab, and it hurts whenever people perceive you as the wrong gender. but a cis person hate-criming, assaulting, verbally abusing, etc, a trans man is not doing "transandrophobia" because they do not perceive him as a man.
they perceive him as a woman failing at her gender, as a woman who has been seduced and lied to and manipulated because women are so easily led astray, just like it says in the bible. they perceive him as a woman who has been mutilated. they perceive him as a dyke that needs to be fixed. if they are hate-criming him because they *do* perceive him as a man, because he passes well enough they aren't thinking he could be trans, then they're doing so out of homophobia, perceiving him as a gay man, a pervert, a sissy, a danger to children. OR, they are being transphobic but specifically because they think he might be transfeminine instead. when cis society oppresses a trans woman, they are able to do it on multiple levels at once. She's a woman failing at her gender, a dyke that needs to be fixed. Or she's an evil and grotesque crossdressing pervert, a rude caricature, a danger to polite society. she will never be doing enough to escape oppression entirely, no matter if she gets every surgery she can and wears makeup every day and passes perfectly, because she lives under a patriarchy, and she's a woman, so she lives in a panopticon, and HAVING to get surgery and wear make-up to be respected IS oppression, especially if the alternative is being hate-crimed.
trans women (and trans men who pass) are not experiencing "transandrophobia" when a 'queer women and nbs" event turns them away at the door for being too masculine. they are. IN FACT!! experiencing the byproducts of misogyny in a patriarchy!!! where the terfs and coward cis women running those events and occupying those spaces have been taught (sometimes through experience, sometimes by men, sometimes by women) throughout life that men = stronger and more dangerous than women ALWAYS. That they need to protect themselves at all times and always be vigilant. That men and women can't be friends without sexual tension (and so as queer women the mere existence of what they perceive as a "man" is a threat). That women need a separate sports league because they can't possibly compete with someone who has even a little bit "extra" (an unquantifiable amount actually because there isn't a standard range) testosterone. That women should cook and men should fix cars. i promise you, i promise i promise i promise. it's misogyny. like!!! you don't say cis gay men experiences "androphobia", bc that's not a thing!! you sound like fucking mens rights activists guys please! you don't say a black man experiences "misandrynoir"!! because living in a patriarchy fundamentally means men do not experience oppression based on their gender. its not happening. shut the fuck up. stop walking us back to 2014 can we please take a step forward and stop bitching about this. there are genuine issues in the world and i'm frankly sick of people who should be smarter than that needing to be gently hand-held through this fucking explanation for the millionth time and still stomping their feet.
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cerbaros · 20 days ago
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sideblogformentalhealtshit · 2 months ago
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The most ??? experience is when you struggle your whole life with something you don't know the name of and nobody else does it and you feel all weird and outcast and Othered by it, and then you find out what it's called and start finding out about other people's experiences with it... only to find out that, compared to them, what you have is actually mild in comparison. So then it's like. You're too weird for "normal" people but too normal to feel like you really fit in&belong with the more "weird" ones.
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iratusmus · 2 years ago
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scourge unleashed aus mean nothing to me unless he is a catboy
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uncanny-tranny · 1 year ago
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This might be a very specific experience, but I think a huge reason I didn't even realize or even want to be bisexual was specifically because of this intersection of my manhood and the way it's viewed
There's this toxic merry-go-round I find myself riding where I am so desperate to not be one of those guys to a woman that it winds up being an inability to connect to women* because of this hyperpolicing I end up doing. For the longest time, I repressed myself because of this impulse, and I find it interesting. It's interesting seeing how this aspect of patriarchy impact me in such a way that I was too afraid of myself and the people around me.
As a trans man, I felt the pressure to prove both that I'm not one of those men, but also, that I wasn't this predatory trans man, that anything I did was in service to proving why I should (or should not) continue to exist. Simultaneously, I am both not a man, but also a predatory man because of my transness, a threat to be contained. I felt this before as somebody who is multisexual, but it somehow affects me more in the aspect of how I interact with women* and womanhood* from the outside.
There isn't an overarching theme to this post, a message about what you can do. It's mostly reflecting on my experiences and thinking about where my impulse to think myself as guilty until proven innocent plays into how I've started viewing myself. I don't want to overgeneralize, but I've seen this expressed by many a trans man*.
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soothedcerberus · 1 year ago
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Speaking of Team Fortress 2…
I just remembered that like in 2012 I made my whole youth group watch all the TF2 “meet the” videos on the big projector we had downstairs at my church
I’m pretty sure it was during a service too janbsjxn
Everyone upstairs learning about jesus and us cool kids downstairs I made watch wacky cartoon men explode each other 
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franthonyofficial · 2 years ago
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anybody else up thinking about this……
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kkoct-ik · 1 year ago
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i can def relate to having an abusive mother, the worst part is that people always assume mothers to be good people. thankfully my dad and mother don't live together so i chose to stay with my dad permanently but my dad's girlfriend is constantly talking about how i should make up with my mother because "you only get one mom" and she completely ignores me when i try to talk about how abusive my mother was
yeah. ugh. sorry about your situation anon. it sucks and im sending sympathies
#ask#i just dunno what to do with myself#as if complex trauma isnt enough im now dealing with a lot of complicated situations regarding what to do now#i dont live there anymore. but my siblings do. hi guys i have 4 younger siblings#and me as much as everybody else just wishes there was a nice family to help us develop stable and normal#so im doing my damn best. im trying to stay in contact with the kids. im hoping they have a better support system than i did#but family policy means the teens get no texting privacy no internet time. so as if i can fucking stay in touch and look out for them anywa#i dont think i can do anything. it feels inevitable that every kid is gonna get completely fractured like me#and the only other alternative risks making it worse and uncomfortable when its none of my business anymore#(taking up my therapist on calling cps. lol)#i cant talk about it with my siblings (no real access to them) and it makes me insane#i cant talk to my dad because he has enough shit and i dont want to drive the family to pieces#i cant talk to my mum because she has a habit of abusing the kids and then telling them its because *I* made her mad; blame me#what am i meant to do#as if the past isnt a lot to process right now. im also dealing with the present that this is probably ongoing and theres fuck all i can do#sorry for venting. im in hell. im trying to be normal and failing spectacularly#abuse#domestic abuse#for cw#i wish i didnt have to worry. i wish this was never a problem in the first place
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depressedzelda · 1 year ago
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i haff 2 complain abt somrthing DUMB going on basically a close friend who has been best friends with my bf their Whole lives wont stop hitting on me and making gross comments abt me behind my back and its peeving literally everybody off and now EYE have to be the one to deal with it and im ANNOYED!!! oh well
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townofcrosshollow · 2 years ago
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Idk man if you're constantly talking about your crushing loneliness and feelings of being ostracised and left out when you ostensibly have a bunch of friends around you then maybe the feelings of loneliness aren't the problem there
#i would always feel really empty and distant and 'act out' after our hangouts#and i always framed it as like 'i get the high when i'm around people and then i crash afterwards'#and didn't really consider that maybe sitting in a vc for 4 hours feeling left out while other people have fun is just soul sucking#it was always framed as my behaviour that was the problem. 'you did this and you did that.' so i just kinda internalized that#if i felt like shit it must be my fault. everybody knows i'm the one who causes problems so i'm just causing more problems#if i say that something made me uncomfortable and the response is 'i wont make accomodations and how dare you even ask' it must be my fault#idk. we filled out consent forms in the game i'm really not excited to play and i was reminded that nobody ever asked my consebt#and when i tried to advocate for myself and voice that i wasn't consenting it was treated like i was causing problems by trying to say that#and i saw that as a reasonable reaction at the time cause i had been so deeply convinced that i was broken and horrible#that if i was trying to revoke my consent or even just negotiate it then i was ruining everything for everybody else#that if i was uncomfortable with what was going on i needed to just shut up and live with it#i wish i had realized that and dropped out months ago. maybe that could have preserved some semblance of my relationships with those people#far too late for that now. i'm trying to accept that#and all that effort was wasted anyway#i tried to say once that i was putting in a massive amount of effort and i felt like nobody was recognizing that fact#and i still kind of feel that way#i put hours of mental energy into trying to be enough for people who kept demanding more from me and kept giving me less in return#did that do me any good or did it just cause me 3 months of grief and an empty bank account from therapy?#the problem is that i still wish things had turned out better even though i know i had no control over that#if i had kept advocating for myself it just would have been over far faster. i guess that might have spared me a bit of money#if i tried to talk about the problems it would have just been dismissed with some quick quippy therapy phrase amounting to 'not my fault'#we're already living in the universe where i put all my effort into changing in the ways i was told to change and look how well that went#idk. the attitude was never 'let's fix the problems.' it was always 'you need to fix it.' and then when i did it was#'now there's a new problem. fix that one too. and this one. and that one.'#and to do all that work for somebody and then be told they thought you never even cared about them. man it just stings#idk. it's in the past now. but i can't build new relationships. i'm trying and it's impossible#i try meeting new people and they all suck. i try strengthening relationships with old people and they all get too busy or leave.#the only reason i post these things on tumblr is cause i don't have anybody else to talk to about it#the only person i could talk to has their own shit going on. there really just isn't anybody else#personal
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kidfoundonstreets · 2 years ago
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literally aware of hearing loss bc tinnitus felt extra like a bitch this time so gonna try my fuvkling best not tolisten to music as much as i can for a week or two wish me luck
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cutter-kirby · 2 years ago
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haven’t been able to have a dnd session in like a month which means I’m analyzing my character to myself in the bathroom mirror for no reason
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kavehater · 1 month ago
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THIS IS SO HUMBLING FR CAUSE the only ppl who did reach out were Hal dahlia and meto (out of the billions of ppl ik)
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#and raisa but I didn’t get back to her so that makes me a bad friend in that regard#I should fix that#idk I don’t think I have a valid excuse per se but like it’s a bit valid bc she disappointed me and it kinda added fuel to the flame of wha#everyone else was doing#dora daily#it was just insult to injury even tho she always said oh sorry I couldn’t reply bc ….#you do realise I can tell when someone is making a legitimate excuse and when someone is making up a dumbass excuse ? most of the time it i#not a legitimate excuse it’s just a dumbass excuse#and if you think I’m so stupid as to not see right through that you’ve got another thing coming#you don’t need to make excuses to me out of social nicety you know#if you don’t gaf that’s completely fine I will not hound you to gaf abt me more 🤷‍♀️#like idk why ppl make it seem we’re tied by some indestructible tether#we’re not exactly bound for life if you don’t like me that much#and I wish ppl would be less reluctant to cut ppl off even if there’s no problem apart from the fact that they realise they do not like the#that much !#like istg if you don’t like me that much idm I swear I don’t just cut me off is all I ask#and it’s strange bc it’s like this is the exact same issue with almost everybody I know right now#it’s strange bc I don’t know why everyone’s like this and#it’s odd to see the way this is at such high frequency like ??? questions all around fr#eh whatever#and the thing is I can tolerate rlly bad abuse without a word so I can endure A LOT. but the reason I just stopped was bc my health actually#plummeted really really bad I’d get panic attacks every time I’d think of speaking to someone#it just felt like every time I’d go to sleep and wake up I’d not get any rest or reprieve from that feeling#then came the heart issues like I swear I genuinely in all ways you look at it I COULDNT speak at all#and if you’re like oh well texting is different to speaking#no I COULD speak irl But it’s the texting that couldn’t happen#like if I tried to even if I was miserable I can do things while utterly miserable it’s fine#but this wasn’t even the miserable benchmark it was something so completely unexplored uncharted territory#I’ll never be able to explain what that period was#but do know I hold all who even asked or remembered I existed in very high regard
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traumagenica · 10 months ago
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being plural is honestly a wild experience because every time i think i understand whats going on in here i come to find out something even weirder than before and like. im not even mad at this point it's just like can someone just tell me what's going on instead of letting me piece it together on my own?? can somebody in here gimme a goddamn hand???? creepy ass motherfuckers doing shit in the background and whisper whispering in my ear until i Realize IS NOT AN EFFICIENT MEANS OF COMMUNICATION. USE YOUR WORDS SPEAK WITH YOUR WHOLE CHEST goddamn!
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bimbopawz · 10 months ago
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i feel bad, current self reflection includes i do miss everyone and feel bad and want to apologize and everything, but i'm processing in like. reverse so i can't even be as heartfelt as i wish i could be
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carebearbussy · 5 months ago
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𝙨𝙖𝙡𝙩𝙮 & 𝙨𝙬𝙚𝙚𝙩
ᥫ᭡ 𝙨𝙮𝙥𝙣𝙤𝙥𝙨𝙞𝙨: 𝙞𝙣 𝙬𝙝𝙞𝙘𝙝… 𝙨𝙪𝙠𝙪𝙣𝙖𝙨 𝙥𝙧𝙚𝙜𝙣𝙖𝙣𝙩 𝙬𝙞𝙛𝙚 𝙜𝙚𝙩𝙨 𝙫𝙚𝙧𝙮 𝙨𝙩𝙧𝙖𝙣𝙜𝙚 𝙛𝙤𝙤𝙙 𝙘𝙧𝙖𝙫𝙞𝙣𝙜𝙨.
ᥫ᭡ 𝙥𝙖𝙞𝙧𝙞𝙣𝙜𝙨: 𝙝𝙚𝙞𝙖𝙣 𝙚𝙧𝙖! 𝙨𝙪𝙠𝙪𝙣𝙖 𝙭 𝙛𝙚𝙢𝙖𝙡𝙚! 𝙧𝙚𝙖𝙙𝙚𝙧
ᥫ᭡ 𝙘𝙬: 𝙋𝙪𝙧𝙚 𝙛𝙡𝙪𝙛𝙛 <3
ᥫ᭡ 𝙬𝙘: 1.3k
𝙬𝙖𝙣𝙣𝙖 𝙨𝙚𝙚 𝙢𝙤𝙧𝙚? 𝙝𝙚𝙧𝙚𝙨 𝙢𝙮 𝙢𝙖𝙨𝙩𝙚𝙧𝙡𝙞𝙨𝙩
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✦ .  ⁺   . ✦ .  ⁺   . ✦✦ .  ⁺   . ✦ .  ⁺   . ✦✦ .  ⁺   . ✦ .  ⁺   .
Your cravings have been going wild.
Ever since you had fallen pregnant by an absolute gargantuan of a man, you are forced to carry twice the amount of nutrients and food stored in your body. The local doctors had recommended that your usual meals be doubled in size, in order to support the extra weight it carried by having a child under Sukuna. And even Sukuna had chimed in, adding that maybe his diet would work for you. But you quickly declined the offer, taking into consideration the life growing inside of you. You did not want your child to grow up to be a cannibalistic monster, much like his father.
But your food choices have been much more bizarre as of lately. Things ranging from huge one course meals that could feed a family of 7, pickled everything, anything covered in cheese, and any regular foods you ate had to be made a specific way, or served in larger portions. Which is why you had decided to wake Sukuna up in the middle of the night, one of the cravings you had pondered on being at the top of your to do list.
Every now and then, your cravings would get really bad. To the point where it was now everybody else's problem. But you truly couldn't help it.
"Kuna, 'Kuna wake up!" You whispered, as you lay spooned beside him. You shook his body from behind you as you spoke, making sure he could hear you. You felt him stretch awake with a low groan, letting you free of his grasp. "Are you awake? Its important..." you ask, awaiting a response out of him. And to your avail, he is awake, but not with the attitude you were initially hoping for. He seemed annoyed that his rest had been interrupted, but those concerns were to be put to rest, as you stepped out of bed, sliding your slippers on by the edge of the bed. He looks at your standing form with half lidded eyes, clearly making the first of many signals of his annoyance with you at the moment.
"What is so important that you wake me from my rest, woman? Im giving you six seconds to speak." He says, as he props himself upwards, sitting at the edge of the bed. With you standing near him, he seizes your hips with his lower set of hands, forcing you into his proximity. "I'm not waiting all day." He ushers you on to speak, but as you think about his possible answer, you start to rethink telling him what you truly want. You look away, clearly starting to get nervous with the attention. But as you do, he grabs your chin, forcing you to look down at him, as he searches for answers. "Go on."
"Well... i've been having cravings lately, and I wanted to know if maybe the kitchen could make me something..." You say, fiddling with your thumbs, as you feel your stomach start to growl lowly. He looks down at your stomach, as you quietly protest his decision to be made. He closes his eyes for a couple seconds, before responding.
"If this is what you really need, then I will indulge this once, brat." He says with a low sigh, as he lets go of his hold on your waist, getting up from his spot on the bed. You look up at him eagerly, silently squealing to yourself as you jump up and down slightly. You wrap your arms around your husbands neck, as you reach up on your tiptoes to pepper kisses all over his defined face. He looks down at your cheerful form, looking unaffected by the attention you give him, but deep down is smiling on the inside. He knows that as long as you stay his sweet, happy wife, then he can get a good nights rest after this.
He picks you up by the back of your thighs, as you are lifted off the ground what seems suddenly. He hoists you on his left side, one hand holding your ass up, the other acting as a back rest. Letting yourself be carried, he opens the door with his right hand, walking into the large hallway to your favorite place since becoming pregnant, the kitchen.
✦ .  ⁺   . ✦ .  ⁺   . ✦✦ .  ⁺   . ✦ .  ⁺   . ✦✦ .  ⁺   . ✦ .  ⁺   .
It seemed as if you had started a national crisis.
With the way you had Uraume, as well as a team of the estates chefs working like dogs in the kitchen. All that could be heard from the upper left wing of the estate was the clinking and clanging of pots and pans, as well as chefs scurrying to prepare the food you had requested. Because it was well known that any request of yours, was to be taken as seriously as if it were from Sukuna.
Uraume seemed to be the only calm one, with them being used to your shenanigans. They were the head of the kitchen, as they lead all of the preparations for the 'big feast', as they like to call it. That big feast being for your pregnant self, of course.
As the kitchen was torn shred by shred trying to prepare you the perfect dish, you stood by the entrance and watched, one hand on your stomach. Standing besides you was Sukuna, with lower arms crossed, as his upper arms conducted the kitchen staff with whats right and wrong. Your eyes lit up with excitement, as you watched all of these people cater to your needs.
"Kuna, how about... chocolate filled dumplings?" You asked, looking up at your focused husband. He was busy keeping an eye on everything, making sure not to mess up your multiple requests you had made in the past twenty minutes. He looks at you with upper set of eyes, his lower ones hyper focused on the kitchen staff.
"That sounds disgusting. But if that is what you wish, so be it." He tells you, scoffing at all of the ridiculous things you had said so far. He then watches as Uraume heads your way, a silver platter in hand, holding what seemed to be at least thirty pieces of bacon, covered in chocolate and sea salt. To any sane person, this would look downright vile. But to you? Sukuna watched as your mouth practically dropped. You squealed in excitement, looking at the dish in hand. "Please enjoy, my lady." Uraume says, still holding out the dish to you as you happily devour it.
But you pause as you look over at Sukuna, still looking down at you. And thats when a lightbulb flicks in your head. You grab a piece of bacon from the tray, as you step in front of Sukuna. He looks down at you, wondering what you're up to, when you reach up on your tippy toes to try and pry open his mouth. "Pleaseeee try it!" You say, pouting your lips, still trying to open his mouth with your fingers. He looks down at you as he furrows his eyebrows, curling his lip upwards. "No, that is repulsive."
Your pout lowers into a full frown, your eyes glossy with the want for him to try what you are offering him. He rolls his eyes, as he picks up the piece of bacon you are holding with two fingers. He looks at it, as he scoffs, swallowing it in one go. "See! Its good right?" You ask him, a smile crossing your face. He looks at you with a 'are you serious?' look, before ruffling your hair, amused with how happy you were that he divulged you.
"It was horrible. Never again are you going to make me do these kinds of things for you, brat."
✦ .  ⁺   . ✦ .  ⁺   . ✦✦ .  ⁺   . ✦ .  ⁺   . ✦✦ .  ⁺   . ✦ .  ⁺   .
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