#so that’s cool!!! didn’t make me emotional !!! made me normal and cool and chill !!! | Explore Tumblr posts and blogs

ametrictonofaudacity · 10 months ago

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Okay so consider!!!

Yandere platonic Geralt!! Generally very cool!! Very nice!! But if you fuck up you have to deal with (what you have dubbed) the get along cuff. Which is literally him just making you sleep next to him and tying your leg to his with a bit of leather cord. It’s thin so he can easily snap it if there’s a danger, but he’ll wake up if you move it.

Also Jaskier being completely fine and okay with this would be hilarious, I would love to see you write a scenerio!! (Idk why but I picture a modern reader, like one who got dropped in the Witcher from the modern world)

I love this ask!! I also love the trope of a modern character in a medieval setting, I think it was all the ‘Modern Girl IN Middle Earth’ fanfics I read (an actual tag on ao3) so I have a weakness for it!! Also Jaskier just going ‘eh’ is so funny to me.

Warnings: forced proximity, captivity, kidnapping, some level of being infantalized, being tied to another person as a form of being restrained, future Stockholm syndrome. Jaskier is complicit, up to you whether he is also a yandere or not. Also the fact Geralt can smell emotions

“You know this could be like, an actual danger?”

You try and reason your way out of your situation, like reason has ever worked on Geralt before. He ignores you, mostly, concentrating on tying the knot around your wrist in a manner that you cannot undo the knot but it also didn’t cut off your circulation. He slips a finger under the cord, testing the knot and the cords strength, and you hear him make a satisfied rumble. You were still getting used to that, to the various sounds the Witcher made to express emotion.

“No it’s not. The cord’s thin, and if I have to fight I can snap it easily. Plus this area doesn’t normally have monsters, not this time of year.”

He stands, towering over you from you spot on the ground, near the fire, and you tilt your face up. The yellow light throws his features into a harsh countenance, makes his face all angles and scars, golden eyes reflecting the light the way a predators would as he glared down at you, scowling. You tighten your fingers in the wool cloak he had given you, so long ago, the fibers catching in your nails.

He must see something in your gaze, or maybe it’s the way you know you probably reek of anxiety right now, but his stance softens, the scowl melting away into something softer, not a smile because you knew he was still very, very upset with you, but not a harsh frown that made you feel small and stupid and like all the things he thought about you were true.

He crouches, making himself smaller next to you, and you feel your shoulders start to unwind. It was strange, being around someone who was so perceptive to your emotions, but seemingly had no clue how to address or handle them, beyond his own instincts as a Witcher and his limited interpersonal skills. His very limited interpersonal skills.

Seriously. You were pretty sure the guy only had two friends.

“You’re going to try and run again. Maybe not tonight, but I clearly can’t trust you to behave without me keeping my eye on you at all times. Since I can’t do that while I’m asleep, this is the solution.”

He motions to the thin leather cord, and you scowl, face twisting into something you know is ugly but doing it anyways. He wouldn’t be intimidated, you knew, he seemed to view you as some helpless kid, even though you were a fully grown adult who had been attending college.

“You wouldn’t have to watch me if you just let me go, Geralt. You can’t… you can’t just not let someone go home, that’s not right.”

You snap, fingers burying further into the cloak to stave off the chill that was only getting colder, creeping up your arms and legs to your torso and making you shiver. It had just gotten dark, the little fire Geralt built crackling away and too small to provide much warmth but rapidly gaining strength, and you shiver, leaning toward the fire and away from the Witcher.

“We’re not having this conversation again. You can’t survive out there on your own.”

Your face flushes, angry, and you bury your face further into the cloak. He had a point, to some extent. You weren’t used to the world of the Witcher, with its monsters and it’s hardships, weren’t used to the roughness of medieval life and all of its struggles. You were used to the modern world, where distances could be travelled by car, not horse, and you didn’t have to endure biting cold in the winter and blazing heat in the summer.

“That doesn’t mean I can’t at least try, Geralt. What kinda person would I be if I didn’t at least try to get home?” You protest, and there’s the sound of rustling, a muttered curse. Looks like Jaskier was back with wood.

“Ah. Seems I walked into a horribly tense situation.”

Jaskier remarks, but his voice is light, not taking your predicament seriously, even as his eyes land on the tether around your wrist and Geralt’s as he feeds wood into the fire, which licks up the logs and sticks eagerly, hungry for fuel. You scowl, face buried in the cloak to hide your sour mood as much as possible. Geralt didn’t care if you were pisses off or not, he cared when you were afraid not when you were mad, but Jaskier would do everything in his power to pull you out of your bad mood. From telling stories to playing little tavern songs, he would be relentless in making sure you cracked a smile at least once, and you didn’t feel like having to endure the bards attempts to cheer you up right now.

“Is tying them to you really necessary though, Geralt? They look like a kicked pup, can’t you be a bit more lenient?”

Jaskier wheedles, and wow, he might actually be your favorite person right now. You peek up from the fold of the cloak, and he’s got a hand on a hip, shifting his weight with a concerned frown. He looks entirely disapproving of the whole thing, which makes your heart soar. Maybe he would actually be able to get Geralt to listen to him.

“They’re lucky I don’t tie them on Roach all day.” Geralt grumbles, setting up the bed rolls. You could feel every small movement he made, the motion tugging gently on the thin tether.

“Oh you grump. Stop being so rude.” Jaskier huffs, sitting next to you, and you quietly despair how easily he gave in, how quickly he yielded to what Geralt wanted to do. You tuck your face back into the cloak, dejected.

“Hey now, it isn’t all bad. There are worse places to sleep. I can recall a few of them myself.”

Jaskier’s hand lands on your shoulder, and you glare, annoyed. You didn’t want company, or comfort, or any of it. You wanted one thing, and it was something that the both of them were denying you.

Jaskier, because he was Jaskier, seemingly didn’t notice. Which wasn’t the greatest.

“Yeah, sure, I guess. Never slept tied to somebody, though.” You say pointedly, and the annoyed rumble Geralt gives is almost worth it. Sharp gold eyes narrow at you slightly, before Geralt huffs, turning back to his task.

“I have! Well, it was more I had been knocked unconscious, but it still applies, I think! And those ropes were rather coarse, my wrists were aching for days!” Jaskier recalls. “Geralt had to rescue me, it was quite the adventure. I wrote a song about it, at some point, although I never published it. I really should rework that song, actually, come to think of it.”

He rambles, his voice filling the tense silence between you and Geralt, and you feel your shoulders start to relax. He was good at that, chattering to fill the silence that would drag on for hours between the two of you if it wasn’t for him. You sigh quietly, leaning into the warm hand clasped on your shoulders as the fire grows in strength, the bedrolls almost fully prepared.

“Alright. Jaskier, you take first watch, and I’ll take over in an hour or so.” There must not be many monsters around, you think, for Geralt to be so comfortable letting Jaskier take watch. Jaskier nods, slipping away your side as Geralt approaches.

“Not a problem! I was feeling wired tonight anyways, a few more hours though and I should be able to sleep well enough.” Jaskier agrees amicably. “Although I am a bit surprised, you normally insist on first watch.”

“Wanna get (Y/N) down.” Geralt huffs, and Jaskier nods.

“Fair enough, I suppose. They are criminally lacking in the sleep department, they’re beginning to get bags, poor thing.”

You scowl at Jaskier, annoyed.

“I’ve had these since middle school, first of all, not my fault I have insomnia.” You scowl, and jerk when Geralt all but drags you to the bed roll, barely waiting for you to finish talking.

“Hey!” You protests, annoyed, but he’s too busy ‘getting you settled’ as he liked to call it. Fussing over the blankets and the best roll, making sure your body was protected from the harsh winds that even the fire couldn’t stave off.

“Jaskier, stop keeping them up.” Geralt grumbles, sounding more tired than annoyed. He drags you closer, and it must be a Witcher thing to radiate heat like a furnace, because he was chasing off the cold without even trying, the same arm that you were tied to securing you against his chest.

“Pretty sure I can sleep on my own.”

You snark, and Geralt rolls his eyes.

“Not for the next week you aren’t, if that. Now go to bed.”

You scowl, glaring up at him. With the blanket over you, the fire, and the heat radiating off his body, you were tired, sure. But not tired enough not to say something, not when you were being treated like an idiot who couldn’t do anything for themselves.

“You can’t just- Geralt this isn’t right, and you know it. You can’t just- keep me here!”

You protest. Arguing with Geralt was much like arguing with a wall, honestly. Stubborn and just as likely to listen to you as the bricks that made up the walls of your old college.

But walls could come down. You just had to get through to him, make him realize that what was doing wasn’t going to work. You weren’t strong enough or fast enough to escape him, not without some clever plan or tricks up your sleeve, and you were pretty sure that an Olympic level athlete would still have issues trying to outpace him. So your only hope was getting him to listen.

It was a fragile hope, but it was the only hope you had.

“We’re not talking about this right now. Go to sleep.”

Geralt grumbles, and you open your mouth again. The warning rumble in his chest cuts you off, and you swallow.

The sound was exactly that. A warning. Geralt had never hurt you before, not really, but whenever he got mad things were miserable. Jaskier would be irritated with you for ‘putting Geralt in a mood’ as he put it, and you would be without the bard’s chattering to fill the heavy silent between you and Geralt. Not to mention the awkwardness of being forced to ride atop Roach with Geralt, the silence thick with tension between the two of you, or the way you would hope desperately for the day to end so you could go to sleep.

No, it was better to keep the Witcher happy. For all parties.

“Alright. Good night.” You finally mutter, and he sighs, the tension leaving his body. You feel his torso loosen, relaxing behind you, and you feel your hand shaking, just slightly. Or a little more than slightly. Your stomach twists, and Geralt sighs.

“I know you don’t understand. But you’ll realize this is what’s best for you.” He says it like it’s supposed to be an assurance, smoothing a hand over your hair like you’re a particularly fussy child, and you consider, for a second, twisting and biting that hand. Driving your teeth deep enough to draw blood and make him listen to you, for once.

You don’t, mainly because you know he would just move it fast enough your teeth would just snap at empty air.

You close your eyes. With the almost stifling heat behind you, and the too-heavy weight of the cord on your wrist that logically shouldn’t feel as heavy as it did, sleep does not come easy. Eventually, though, you feel your consciousness slip away into oblivion.

#yandere platonic Geralt of Rivia #yandere witcher #yandere platonic Geralt #platonic yandere x reader

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aquagirl1978 · 11 months ago

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Snow Angels - Cyran Rose x Reader (Ikemen Prince)

A/N: Day 11 of my 12 Days of Christmas event.

Pairing: Cyran Rose x Reader

Prompt: a walk in the woods

Word Count: 941

Tags: fluff

Large snowflakes drifted down from the dark skies as you walked through the woods. Soft and fluffy, the snow quickly covered Cyran’s fiery red hair.

You weren’t quite sure what possessed you to ask him to join you on your walk that evening, but you did. And you were even more shocked that he agreed to come. Maybe it was the tired look on his face when you saw him leaving the training grounds that made you think that maybe he needed a friend to talk to.

Come to think of it, you had only seen Cyran around Clavis. Or Sariel. Or the other knights. You at least had Rio, but did Cyran have any friends?

Maybe you could be that friend to Cyran.

At least, that’s what you told yourself as you both headed out as the snow began to fall.

That proved to be harder than you had thought, though, you quickly discovered.

“How was your day today?” you asked, genuinely curious.

“It was ok,” he replied plainly, his face devoid of any emotion.

“So…” you pondered, as you rubbed your hands together, thinking of something to talk about. “I love it when it snows. Everything is so pretty.”

Cyran replied with a derisive snort. “You don’t like the snow?” you asked.

“Never said I didn’t like it. Just it makes extra work when I have to help with his traps, is all.”

Ah, the famous Lelouchian traps. Even you had heard of them in your short time in Rhodolite.

“You and Clavis…you’ve made a lot of traps together?”

“Enough that I wouldn’t mind seeing that hellcat fall into one someday,” he said with a smirk. His eyes crinkled as he glanced at you, your face felt warm as you wondered if this was the first time you saw Cyran smile.

A comfortable silence fell as you continued your walk, the snowflakes – now resembling fluffy balls of cotton – getting larger the longer you walked. The path between the dense trees began to narrow, forcing you to walk closer to Cyran. On occasion, your hands brushed against one another. Each time with Cyran quickly pulling away.

There was a large clearing ahead, with long, snow-covered branches criss-crossing, creating a canopy. You were quiet as you approached save for the sounds of your boots crunching the now thick snow on the ground.

You walked towards the clearing’s center, your body moving as if it was drawn by a magnet. With your hands outstretched, you slowly spun in a circle like a child trying to catch a snowflake.

And as you spun, you could have sworn you heard something in the cool, chill air.

You continued to spin, the sound of Cyran’s light laughter ringing clear like a bell in the woods. His laughter was infectious; it wasn’t long before you were laughing, too.

Lost in the moment, you tried to stop spinning when you began to feel dizzy. But you were unable to stop, and soon you found yourself down on the ground in the snow. Cyran quickly came rushing to your side; he peered down at you, perplexed to find you were still laughing despite lying in the cold snow.

“Are you okay?” he asked, his hand outstretched, offering assistance. “Please let me help you up.”

Any other day, you would have gladly taken Cyran’s hand, your knight in shining armor. But not today. Today, you were having fun playing in the snow.

And you wanted Cyran to partake in the fun, too.

When you ignored his offering of assistance, Cyran frowned. “What pray tell are you doing right now?” He let out an exasperated sigh as he watched you.

“I’m making snow angels,” you replied, as if this was the most normal thing an adult could be doing. You moved your arms and legs a few more times and then stopped, sat up and gazed up at Cyran. “Please tell me you made snow angels at some point in your life.”

Cyran rolled his eyes so hard, you thought they’d roll right out of his skull. “I was raised in Obsidian. What do you think?”

“Really? Obsidian?” your eyes went wide as you asked your question.

Cyran grumbled and shook his head. “Another story for another day,” he muttered. “Could you please just take my hand and let me help you?”

Still sitting up, you mulled over his offer for a moment. With a smile, you reached out your hand to his; your fingers slid against his palm, his skin rough against yours. And with one quick tug, you caught Cyran off-guard.

With a disgruntled sound, he fell to the ground next to you. After dusting off some snow, he turned to you. “That wasn’t very –”

You held a finger to his lips, shushing him. ‘Please. Just lie here. Would you lie here with me and make snow angels and forget everything else in the world?”

Your eyes met; you couldn’t be certain, but you thought you saw a twinkle in his eyes as the corners of his lips curved ever so slightly. Wordlessly, he fell back onto the snow, your heart swelling with pride as he did as you asked.

When enough time passed – enough that you both forgot about how late it was – Cyran stood up and offered his hand to you. And this time, you gladly accepted it, allowing him to help you up. You made your way back to the palace much the same way as you did going – with a comfortable silence. Only this time, the distance between you was shorter.

And when your hand brushed against his, this time he didn’t pull away.

Tagging: @redheadkittys @alixennial @rhodolitesroseforclavis @kissmetwicekissmedeadly @chaosangel767 @queengiuliettafirstlady @ikemen-writer @talfollowingstuff @kpop-and-otome @kisara-16 @altairring @lucyw260 @umi-adxhira @crypticbibliophile @lancelotscloak @tele86 @nightfoxqueen @melodiousramblings @wendolrea @aceuuuu @randonauticrap @aria-chikage @nightghoul381 @judejazza @maries-gallery @xbalayage @xenokiryu @alydra @drachonia @ranhanabi777 @silver-dahlia @lunaaka @portrait-ninja @sh0jun @wordycheeseblob

#12 days of christmas #ikemen series #ikemen prince #ikepri #cyran rose #ikepri cyran #ikemen cyran #ikepri fanfic #ikemen fanfic #otome #otome games #otome fanfic

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oleander-nin · 2 years ago

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Idk if I already asked you this but could you do headcannons for how Mikey,Leo,Raph,and Donnie would react to begin told by draxum that they belonged to y/n before he stole and mutated them

(you could do separate or together Idc)

A/N, not important: Sorry it took so long, I've been busy and I'm currently quite sick. Also, just didn't really know how to go about this. Reader is at least 5 years older than the TMNT, or else it wouldn't make sense. So no romance in this one(don't know how I'd stick it in anyway.) I also kinda just, didn't know how to do this one? It was a special ask, I'll give you that anon. Sorry it's such sucky, I struggled. Any criticism is welcome, constructive or not. This is supposed to be a gender neutral reader, so if I screwed up somewhere, please tell me.

Tw: mentions of the turtles being pets, feelings of unease, emotions, idk what else

Words: 723

Summary: The ROTTMNT turtles find out they once belonged to you.

All:

Completely flabbergasted.

Not expecting this at all.

Confused.

Upset.

All the emotions.

You had told them about the four turtles you lost 13 years ago.

That’s why they all bonded with you, you all thought it was funny they were all the same species.

They saw you as another parental figure at this point. Or at least as an older sibling.

They also all felt very weird about this.

You technically owned them.

That didn’t really sit right with any of them.

Very much unhappy and confused turtles.

Mikey:

Very much upset

He really liked you, and he knew how sad you were when your turtles were stolen because you confided in him about it.

Knowing he was one of those turtles made him feel icky.

Wished Draxum never told him this.

In the back of his mind, he knows it’s not that deep

That everything’s still the same.

But he can’t help but feel sad about it.

Ends up buying you a new turtle to ‘replace’ him and his brothers.(After asking if he could of course. He doesn’t want to just bombard you with a new pet you don’t want or can’t take care of.)

Probably is the one to tell you the news as well, probably when giving you the turtle.

Feels weirded out by the situation, but is glad you’re understanding.

Drifts away from you a bit, not really knowing how to go about being near you for a while.

Donnie:

Despite the initial panic and unease he feels, Donnie’s mostly chill about it.

He knew he came from somewhere before all this, but he just wasn’t expecting to know he was stolen from you.

Never really brings it up to you.

In his mind, it doesn’t matter anymore. He’s no longer a pet, and he is his own person.

Everyone comes from somewhere, he just happens to come from the pet shop down the road you visit frequently.

Oh well, at least he now knows.

Tries to ignore it to the best of his ability, not wanting to acknowledge it much more than he has.

He ends up being a bit more distant for a while, mainly accidentally.

He just doesn’t know how to talk to you for a while knowing what he does.

Gets back to normal a bit more once he learns Mikey spilled the beans.

He just ignores that it happened and brushes it out of his mind to the best of his ability.

He has more important things to worry about, where he came from doesn’t matter.

Raph:

He thinks it’s weird, but is more on the chill side.

He has no idea how to feel about it, so he just…. Doesn’t.

He, like Donnie, ignores it.

Doesn’t bring it up, refuses to comment on it when asked, and changes the subject when prompted.

He doesn't distance himself from you at all unlike Donnie and Mikey.

He still enjoys hanging with you, and wouldn’t lose that for anything.

Especially not over something so stupid.

Probably forgets after a couple weeks honestly.

It just doesn’t matter to him at all.

He’s still the same Raph and he knew he was once a normal turtle, so why would it matter where he came from?

Is admittedly a bit disappointed he wasn’t some cool wild turtle before, but he gets over it quickly.

This is how he ended up, and this is how he’ll stay.

Leo:

Straight up doesn’t believe Draxum.

One, why would he remember who they were stolen from?

Two, why would Draxum steal from a person instead of a breeder, or a pet shop?

It just didn’t make sense to Leo.

Either way, he didn’t care too much.

Even if they did belong to you at some point, and that was a big if in his mind, he thought it was hilarious.

If he gets to you before Mikey, he’s telling you through laughs and jokes.

Can not and will not take it seriously.

Finds it even more hilarious if it’s somehow proven to be true.

Constantly brings it up when you’re near.

Jokingly asks you to re-adopt them if he and his brothers ever get turned back into normal turtles.

All in all, after the initial shock wore off, he genuinely doesn't care and sees it more as a joke than anything.

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jinkoh · 1 year ago

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heartbreak anniversary

jinho x gn reader

summary: you're not quite over your break up with Jinho—but neither is he

tags: angst, hurt/comfort, exes to lovers, suggestive, word count: ~2,5k

a/n: guess who really isn't normal about the last magho (and the way he pushes down his hood at 2:45 no i ofc do not know that time stamp by heart haha i'm cool i'm chill) yes it's another joji fic but who is going to write silly little fics about him that i can read before bed if not me? also i know i've used pictures from the same video before but i just couldn't make pictures from the actual magho look nice so 🤷🏻‍♀️🤷🏻‍♀️🤷🏻‍♀️

Masterlist

You tried not to be a sentimental person. Getting so invested in your feelings was surely a waste of energy. But you’d never been good at controlling your emotions. Jinho had been better at that, or at least that’s what he’d liked to say. Maybe it wasn’t always true, but what he’d truly been unbeatable at was snapping you out of your anxiety spirals. It happened often—you had a tendency to overthink and get yourself worked up and Jinho had always, always noticed. He knew how to tiptoe the line between telling you the blunt truth you needed to hear without being too harsh or hurting your feelings. You could probably use that right now.

It was stupid to dwell on the past like this—Jinho would certainly have something to say about that. But you weren’t dating anymore, so it wasn’t like it was any of his business. Surely he wasn’t thinking about you nor about the fact that today was your anniversary; that exactly 3 years ago you’d made it official at that small pavilion by the beach (which honestly wasn’t half as romantic as it sounds like).

No, he surely wasn’t thinking about any of these things. Jinho didn’t have to try not to be a sentimental person. He just wasn’t.

You on the other hand couldn’t think of anything else. You were laying awake even though it was late and you had to work the next day. But you missed him so much, it felt like it was physically tearing you apart. You missed him on his side of the bed, and you missed the way he’d let you cuddle into his chest. The bed felt cold and lonely without him there.

Almost on autopilot, you slipped out from under your warm sheets, and threw on whatever clothes you found laying around before you slipped out into the night.

The walk from your apartment to the beach wasn’t that long, ten, fifteen minutes maybe. It wasn’t midnight yet when you reached the pavilion, so technically it was still your anniversary. The weather was cold and rainy and the stars were hidden behind thick clouds, but that seemed to match your mood perfectly. You’d been here so many times, taking walks along the shore and enjoying the breeze.

That day too hadn’t been anything special. You’d been on a walk together, like you’d been a zillion times before. As friends, of course as friends, except neither of you had felt that way anymore. You’d stopped at that pavilion, chuckled about how pitiful and shabby it looked, but with the sun setting on the ocean, you’d thought it was a tad bit romantic. So you’d said just that, almost immediately regretting it. You’d started walking again, fully expecting Jinho to snort at the sappy comment. But he hadn’t. He’d reached for your wrist, making you stop in your tracks.

Yeah, it’s romantic.

You still remembered the sound of his voice, trembling a little with nerves. It was clear that he’d wanted to say so much more. But that’d been enough, at least for the moment.

You wondered when the two of you had stopped being enough.

For a while you blankly stared out into the night, watching the waves roll onto the beach; the white foam visible despite the darkness. It was silent, as to be expected at this time on a regular work night, especially in a small town like yours. All you could hear was the sound of the ocean and the pitter-patter of the light drizzle against the roof of the pavilion. From time to time, a seagull squawked in the distance.

You stayed until the cold felt like it was biting your skin, and then you stayed longer still, waiting for the rain to stop. It’d picked up significantly, now more of a steady shower rather than a light drizzle and you didn’t fancy getting drenched.

The rain was also the reason you hadn’t heard the sound of footsteps coming closer, only spotting the hooded figure approaching you over the promenade when he’d almost reached the pavilion. It wasn’t like there was anything intimidating about him per se, and surely he was just coming over to seek shelter, but it just seemed a little scary to share this small space with a stranger at the dead of night when no one else was around. So you stepped out into the pouring rain, leaving the pavilion in the opposite direction of the person approaching. You felt anxious, but you forced yourself to walk calmly, casually.

When you dared to steal a glance over your shoulder though, it almost seemed as if the figure was coming after you. With a racing heart you picked up your pace more, trying to put some distance between the two of you, until suddenly a familiar voice cut through the rain.

“Y/n! Wait!”

You stopped in your tracks, your head snapping around. The guy had stopped, leaving a huge gap between the two of you. Full of disbelief you just stared at him for a moment.

“It’s me.” He carefully stepped closer, his arms held up in front of his body in some sort of pacifying gesture.

“Jinho?”

He nodded, lifting his hands to slowly push down the hood of his gray sweater, as if to prove that it was really him, as if you hadn’t recognized him from the moment you’d heard his voice. Your eyes followed the movement, and there was a weird sense of intimacy about it all that you weren’t supposed to share with him anymore.

You helplessly opened and closed your mouth a few times, wanting so desperately to say something but not a single sensible thing came to mind.

“I didn’t know you’d be here,” Jinho broke the silence eventually. “I didn’t think you would be.”

“Why did you come?” It sounded colder than anticipated, but you genuinely just wanted to know. It didn’t make sense that he was here.

“It’s our anniversary.”

The way he said that, as if it was a given, made your heart ache. He wasn’t supposed to think about that. He wasn’t supposed to be a sentimental person who dwelled on the past like this. And yet, it seemed as if he was, and he admitted it so easily too.

“There is no us anymore,” you replied, frail and breathy.

He nodded, averting his gaze and staring at his shoes instead. You thought his eyes looked teary, but you couldn’t be too sure, not with the rain and the darkness surrounding you. “Right.”

It got quiet except for the rain that was still pouring down on you, until he raised his voice again.

“Why did you come?”

You shrugged, tears brimming your eyes. “It’s our anniversary.”

It was barely a whisper, your voice breaking before you could even finish the last syllable.

Jinho rushed in, stepping closer and pulling you into his arms, as if on instinct, as if he couldn’t help himself. He held you while sobs escaped your throat and tears streamed down your face, and you clung onto him, your fingers clutching his hoodie like your life was dependent on it.

“I miss you. I just miss you so.”

“Yeah,” he choked out, burying his face in your hair. “I miss you too.”

The rain wouldn’t let up at all, but it hardly mattered now that both of you were already completely drenched. You weren’t sure how much time had passed with the two of you just standing there, holding onto each other. You didn’t want to know either. All you wanted was for the moment not to end. Despite shivering from the cold, you didn’t let go, too scared you’d both part ways again as if nothing had happened tonight.

It was Jinho who pulled away eventually and you wanted to stop him, pull him back in, but you couldn’t.

“I think it’s time to go home,” he whispered, raindrops running down his cheeks like tears.

You weakly shook your head. “Not yet.”

“You’ll catch a cold out here.”

“So will you.”

He sighed and there was this weird, uncomfortable tension between the two of you. Every word and every move felt like a risk, as if you were walking a tightrope and the tiniest breath of wind could make you fall.

You knew as well as he did that you couldn’t stay out here in the rain forever, but if he left now, nothing would have changed.

“Walk me home then.”

His eyes widened in surprise but then he nodded and there was the hint of a smile tugging at the corners of his lips.

“Okay.”

The walk was quiet, the two of you just walking side by side. You were close enough for your hand to brush against his from time to time, until he reached out his pinky and intertwined it with yours. You felt your heart stop at that tiny gesture, your head turning to look at him. But Jinho didn’t meet your gaze, pointedly focusing his eyes anywhere but on you.

You didn’t let go when you reached your apartment and when he stopped outside your doorstep, you lightly tugged on his hand, urging him to come in with you.

“You’ll catch a cold out there,” you repeated his words from earlier back at him.

Still, he hesitated, his eyes searching yours for reassurance. “Are you sure?”

“Just come in,” you replied, but what you really meant was Just come home.

The door fell shut, leaving the two of you in your half dark hallway, wet clothes sticking to your skin.

Your fingers were still intertwined, cold hands holding onto each other. You were standing way too close, but neither of you moved. Instead, you just looked at each other, taking in every detail of each other’s faces as if to make up for lost time.

His gaze briefly darted to your lips, just for a split second, but you noticed it either way. You also noticed how he swallowed, his Adam's apple bobbing in his throat and the corners of his mouth tensing a bit in the way they always did.

It was just a tiny movement, but it was so him. It made you realize that you must have seen it a zillion times before and more importantly that you wanted to see it a zillion times more.

When you tore your gaze away from his lips and back up to his eyes there was so much longing in them, leaving no doubt in your mind that he missed you just as much as you did. You wanted to kiss him.

“We should dry up,” he whispered.

“We should,” you replied but you didn’t really care.

His gaze wandered to your lips again, and he tentatively leaned in a bit, but then pulled away again, meeting your eyes in a question, asking for consent. Your heart was hammering in your chest so loudly you were convinced he must have heard it too.

“Kiss me,” you pressed out, your voice trembling.

And he did, careful and hesitant, just a brush of his lips against yours, as if it was your first time all over again.

When he broke the kiss way too quickly, a small frown spread on your face. “Do it right.”

Jinho chuckled, reaching up with his thumb to smooth out the crease between your eyebrows, before he cupped your jaw and pulled you in again. He wasn’t as hesitant this time, kissing you until you felt breathless and weak in the knees.

“Was that right?” He asked with a smug smile tugging at the corners of his mouth.

“Almost,” you whispered against his lips. “Better do it again.”

He captured your lips once more, and it felt so familiar, almost habitual, it was as if you’d gone back to the past, as if you were an us again.

Without letting go, the two of you stumbled through the hallway into your bedroom, shoes tossed aside somewhere along the way.

“I think—,” you breathed out between kisses, your hands tugging on the wet fabric of his hoodie, that felt cold against your fingers and must have felt even colder against his torso, “I think we should get rid of this.”

“Should we?”

“Mhm,” you hummed, pushing the hem up just a little bit. “It must be cold, right? Can’t have you getting sick.”

Jinho huffed a laugh and you felt his breath fanning over your lips. “Right, that’d be no good.”

He pulled his sweater over his head, leaving his wet hair all ruffled and sticking up and you couldn’t fight the urge to run your fingers through it and fix it. He let you, catching your wrist in his hand when you pulled away.

“What about you?” He pressed his lips against the palm of your hand. “Aren’t you cold as well?”

“Very much.”

You peeled yourselves out of your clothes, both of you chuckling when your wet jeans clung to your legs so badly, you struggled to get them off and stumbled back onto your bed. It was clumsy but it didn’t feel awkward, not when Jinho shook his head in amusement, nor when he helped you out of the jeans, pulling at the fabric until it finally let go of your legs. There was no room to be uncomfortable or embarrassed, you knew each other too well for that.

Once he’d tossed the jeans aside, you scooted back on the bed and reached out for him, urging him to come closer. He followed suit, propping himself up on his arms as he hovered over you, your faces mere inches apart.

“I missed you,” you whispered as you took in his face, from his dark eyes to the little mole on his upper lip. “I really, really missed you.”

A small smile spread on his face. “Me too. I missed you.”

You kissed him again then, your arms wrapping around his neck to pull his body close to your own. Most of your clothes discarded on the floor, you could feel the goosebumps on your skin and on his, your bodies chilly after being in the rain for so long. You didn’t mind though. You were shivering and trembling, cold touches against cold skin, but your bed felt warm and so did kissing him.

The rain was still pattering outside your window, coming down endlessly. You weren’t sure how much time had passed but you knew it wasn’t even close to morning yet. You rested your head against Jinho’s chest, listening to the steady sound of his heartbeat.

“What do we do now?” you whispered eventually, breaking the silence that had spread between the two of you.

“Sleep?” Was his simple response even though you both knew that wasn’t what you meant.

“And after that?”

“I don’t know,” he whispered and you felt your heart sink at the unsatisfactory response. Before you could say anything though, Jinho pulled you a little closer, resting his chin on top of your head. “We try again.”

Masterlist

#jinho x reader #pentagon x reader #pentagon scenarios #pentagon imagines #pentagon headcanons #pentagon reactions #pentagon fluff #jinho fluff #kpop scenarios #kpop reactions #kpop headcanons #pentagon #pentagon drabble #pentagon fic #kebbis.writing

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prickly-bulbasaur · 1 year ago

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Candied Fruit

Katsuki didn’t know what he wanted, and it was driving him nuts. He knew he wanted something sweet, but not heavy like ice cream, pure sugar like cotton candy or marshmallows, hell not even an oatmeal cookie. He even asked Sato if he had any sweets he made, but Bubbly Kirby took all of the baked goods, dammit.

Sato did say he could make more, but it would take several hours, something Katsuki didn’t have time for. So, he resigned to heading back down to the kitchen to grab the ice cream to eat instead. He knows it is Izuku’s favorite but he didn’t care at the moment and will deal with it tomorrow.

He got out of his thoughts when he heard the clinking of dishes and peeked in to see Sero in the kitchen, standing over a stove keeping an eye on a pot that seemed to be boiling something. Katsuki took a sniff but didn’t smell anything so it was either water or something else that was odorless. Curious, he walked in and leaned over the pot as Sero left to get a tray of assorted fruits that were drying next to the sink. His mouth suddenly watered as he realized his classmate was making Tanghulu, and that was exactly what he was looking for.

“Oh hey, Bakugou! Didn’t see you sneak up behind me.” Sero said as he set the skewered fruit down. He then tilted the pot slightly and dipped the fruit quickly before placing them on wax paper. “What brings you down here so late? Usually, you are in your dorm to sleep away.”

“Y-yeah, I was a little hungry but I don’t know what to eat,” Katsuki grunted, eyeing Sero doing nimble work with the Tanghulu. The clear melted sugar drips back into the pot as the chill from the fruit begins to cool and harden the sugar into a glass casing. Not a single crack or fog in sight, it was the perfect sugar glass.

Sero briefly looked at his dormmate, noticing the red eyes dilate bigger than he had usually seen them when the blonde gets excited when he gets to blow things up. “You ok, Bakugou? You uh…kinda drooling over there.” He chuckles as he gets the rare red embarrassment flush from Bakugou as he turns away to wipe the evidence. “You know, I am making a big batch today where they will most likely last past the fruit’s fresh-by date. I will give them to everyone tomorrow, maybe the extra to Uraraka. She does love her sweets.”

Bakugou growled and pouted, surprising Sero. “Pink Cheeks already had her fair share of sweets. I went to Big Lip’s room to grab some sweets but he straight out told me that she took everything.”

Sero shook his head, “I know I shouldn’t comment on a woman’s diet but she does eat a lot without a thought to share or ask the others if she can have some. I mean, she still had a black eye when she ate Midoriya’s peppermint candy ice cream. Those things are hard to come by and Sato made them just for Midoriya.”

Bakugou paled as he suddenly remembered. “Oh yeah, she was surprised when he did that too. He normally keeps his emotions in check, but when it comes to dessert that is a different story.” He shuddered when an image of a pissed-off Izuku began to berate Uraraka. “He verbally grilled her too and told her all of her flaws both in Quirk and impulse. I don’t think he cared if he made her cry and the other girls were angry at him for a few days.”

Sero chuckled and handed Bakugou a plate of 5 Tanghulu, showing a shine surrounding various fruits like pineapple, strawberries, and most impressively, watermelon. “Yeah, I would have hidden underground if I angered the girls. He fought a war and apparently won.”

Katsuki took the plate and nodded. “Yeah, well, the Midoriya’s have a quiet temper. If you push their buttons enough they will tear you to shreds.” He and Sero sat at the dining table and he picked up one with pineapple, eyeing it and his mouth watered again telling his brain to take a bite. The sheen was so perfect, the glass sugar so clear and not a crack as it cooled it was at the perfect temperature.

He then took a bite and the sugar casing broke with little resistance, the sugar dissolving onto Katsuki’s tongue as the sweet and tangy combo of the pineapple melded into bliss. Katsuki sighed as his craving began to purr in satisfaction, stating that it was the perfect light yet sweet dessert that he needed.

“Hehe, didn’t think you could purr, Bro. I should tell Izuku about this.”

“You do, I will find a way to barely kill you as you are too good at Tanghulu to die.”

The raven-haired teen again chuckled at the blonde before the duo ate their treats in silence. Sero had to wrap the others in separate bags and bring them to his fridge so no one could eat them, especially Uraraka. Bakugou decided to help him with that as a thank you.

#flufftober2023 #flufftober #day11 #my hero acedamia #katsuki bakugou #sero hanta #sweet treat

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silly-plush-corner · 1 year ago

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I know it’s past 9pm and all (you know the image) but it’s so hard to not listen to these feelings when they are just chilling there!!! Like what the fuck am I supposed to do? My brain keeps forcing the same dish in my face, saying “you can’t play mario until you eat your broccoli” but instead of broccoli it’s the fear that everyone knows about the weird stuff I do or is wary or some shit like that and I have no idea what I’m doing in almost any conversation or social situation like I know it’s the autism but I still haven’t figured out how to reconcile the sheer discomfort I feel with the thought that I’m just choosing not to try to figure it out because I fucking freeze up and shit and I get too scared of making mistakes because I have no idea how lenient other people are on things and I have no idea how bad (to them) whatever stupid stuff I’ve done is, it’s like fuckin evangelion, you never truly know what’s going on inside someone else’s head, there is always some separation, fuck I need to watch evangelion again and fuck I need therapy. Fuck, I need therapy. I need to take the time to go get therapy because these thoughts are so fucking sharp and painful and I have no idea how brains are supposed to work, - is it normal that I struggle to remember a lot about my childhood? It could just be that I’m rarely in situations that click the right hyperlink in my brain to land on the right wikipedia page - fuck I need to get therapy because they’d know what brains normally do and how people normally act and yeah I know that nobody’s truly “normal” but I wanna know how I can fit in a little bit. Yeah I’m still gonna be myself but I want the overall artstyle to be cohesive, even if my character looks out of place. I don’t want to look like I was just shittily green-screened in from a different movie I want to be a little more normal I’m so tired I’m so tired of this ok I’m being a little overdramatic about this but I am so tired of it and I am tired of being overdramatic but it takes so much energy to dial it back especially because it’s late and I’m not rerouting this post, this is direct stream of consciousness fuck now it’s getting meta (I fucking hate that word sometimes) and self-conscious fuck why do I have to get so self-conscious I’m even getting fucking self-conscious about getting self-conscious right now I don’t even remember the events that made me this way I don’t know exactly why I’m so self-conscious I just have this vague concept, this abstract fucking anxiety cloud of “people will think you’re weird in a bad way” and “I don’t want to fuck anything up” and “you have no idea how to interact with people” I’m just remembering that time in early high school when my leading philosophy was “don’t be a burden” and my mom was like “oh that’s so sweet” and I was thinking “yeah this makes sense I’m just some fuckin guy I’m not that important” and while yeah that’s true I’m not like super important, that is such a degrading mindset to have, even if I didn’t realize it at the time. Change and conflict is scary and I’m still fucking terrified of it. I was about to say “I should change that [end of post]” like “haha yeah such a deep and cool ending” but like I realize that being afraid of things isn’t necessarily going to change but how I handle that fear can change but I don’t know how to do that and fuck I’m getting self-conscious again and ok I’m getting off topic I think a lot of my current intense yet nebulous insecurities come from 1) that period of “I don’t want to be a burden on anyone” and the conflict avoidance, emotion bottling, complacency, etc. that came with it; and 2) the constant felt need to hide what I was doing because I feared the consequences or didn’t want my parents to get upset at or about me, I would always be like “yeah mom I did my homework” when 10 seconds ago I was thinking to myself “yeah I can get that done soon” and I would have but then mom popped in and if I said “I haven’t done it yet” she’d get stressed out - even if I’d had it under control - and then that would fuck me up because -

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onerabong · 1 year ago

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Chapter 38

I’m gonna keep this super short cuz i have no TIME im so mad but i have to get it out

I totally forgot about the vision Boros saw too, it’s so chilling getting reminded like this wtf

That Iryo/Boros conversation was gold, it’s just so good i don’t even know what to say. Boros still very uncomfortable as fuck around Iryo, wanting him to get out of his room(he’s so cute oh god), but Iryo just staying there. Listening. Staring Boros down with that red, red eye of his. And i loved how for Iryo, that vision he kept seeing basically led him to his doom. Like, i didn’t think of it that way, Boros hasn’t either, but for Iryo, what he said was true. Exodia was the catalyst of his failure. And it was the vision that led him to it.

‘,,But it helped you, too,” Boros points out, all discomfort of talking to Iryo gone – and replaced by the unnerving unknown of what appears to be their mutual stalker.

,,It did. It led me to you.”

A pause.

,,And what happened then?”

Iryo’s voice is cold. Freezing, even.’

I got chills reading this. It seems like such a clever twist of pov for the reader like myself, who only thought of Boros’ perspective. I just love this so much. And then right after Iryo mentions Zael himself.

Look, whenever Iryo even says ‘him’ I die. So this scene was just a continuity of emotional blows for me. It was perfect. I wanna scream. I really can’t put into words how good this conversation was. Just read the fic and you will understand.

Elazar is the cutest character in DM. No I will not take any arguments.

He’s cute, he’s tiny, he’s adorable, and I haven’t even gotten to his personality yet. Why is he so passionate about everything. And so normal. He’s just a regular guy that can get hurt pretty easily and that is so endearing. Why must you be such a babygirl professor. And you put that next to Einaros. Einaros. Probably the horniest motherfucker in the fic(barring Caleb), a total badass, tall, intimidating, and just exudes dominance- i don’t know what you expect me to do Lara they were made to be shipped.

‘,,Take a final look at the pretty pictures if you want – we’ll fly back to Atlas, and you’ll work on your theories or whatever while I’ll try to find out where the pirates are.”

As Einaros expects, Elazar takes his suggestion literally. He turns to the murals, looking at them one by one, spending the most time staring at the picture of the strange creature.’

I might die.

And the fight. THE FIGHT.

Are you KIDDING me why was that so good.

‘He flies out on the other side covered in bits of blood and flesh, and releases a burst of heat that evaporates all of it away in the span of mere seconds.’

This is the coolest fucking thing ever. I was bouncing on my seat reading this whole scene it was so COOL. I was blown away with how much this scene slapped.

‘Einaros changes the flow of his stellar force again – directing it as if he were conducting an orchestra-‘

I have to sit here for a few moments just to appreciate how every line in this scene is a line to marvel at.

And I dunno if I’ve mentioned this before, but the action sequences involving the Xar in this fic is phenomenal. There’s no other way to put it than to say it’s perfect. Because in the anime, everything’s all flashy and quick and you can only appreciate the magnitude of what’s going on when you really think about it. But with this fic, you truly understand the destructive force of every hit these monsters deliver. Like the way the sand crystalizes into glass with the heat. The body parts evaporating. The wind whistling. And to top it off, a recount of what happened from a regular person’s perspective. And he didn’t even see it. I’ve seen a few action sequences in fics, and none of them come even close to what DM delivers. It’s perfection.

I already had this chapter on my top three favorite chapters in DM, even before the fight, but then the ending comes out of nowhere to make sure i’m really dead.

There’s so much to say about the ending but really, and I keep saying this, but the best thing is to just read it. Just read that scene and you’ll see, how difficult it is to articulate what it made me feel.

If I say all the stuff I wanna say this is going to take forever so again, I’ll keep it super short and just make a list of things that killed me.

Einaros and Zael’s interaction.

-‘Crazy little dude but really entertaining. You’d hate him.’ (That ‘you’d hate him’. It shows Einaros knows Zael so well and I can’t get over this)

-‘Surprisingly, Zael feels himself gradually relaxing.’ (I must scream)

-‘it’s been a quality of his brother’s that’s been familiar to Zael since their earliest childhood days.’ (I must scream)

-‘Contemplating thoughts that he kept locked behind some very expertly reinforced doors of his mindscape.’(this fucking man)

I just realized that I want to copy paste literally ALL of the lines from after this and that would not be a good idea.

Zael asking who Einaros met. I’m really not kidding when I say I was shocked, and so very emotional when I read this. It really was like getting hit in the head.

And everything that comes after. I am also realizing that no, I’m still not calm about this to write a coherent review about it. Not sure if I ever will be. I can only say that it was the most emotionally painful thing to read only second to that flashback for the brothers.

I really, really love Zael. He’s one of my all time favorite characters in all the fandoms I’ve been in. I don’t draw him much so it might not show most of the time but it’s true. So seeing him like this, this character that’s supposed to be strong and scary and antagonistic, it’s absolutely heartbreaking. In the best fucking way of course.

So along with this new development for Zael this chapter ends, having thoroughly beaten me though this rollercoaster of a ride.

I will remember this chapter for months and months.

#dm #dark matter #dark matter rambles

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puppy-the-mask · 2 years ago

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We finished season 4 and I immediately clocked Azure as Elfman from fairytail and then found out his va is also All Might

Gonna put all my thoughts about it in one post under the cut

I’m so happy MK’s past is being touched on as a main plot line and also- Pigsy literally being MK’s adoptive dad made us emotional ;w; HE CALLED HIM SON- MK CALLED HIM DAD I’m fucking sobbing ;;;A;;;

Also I’m about to throw down with this fucking bird- even in the brotherhood he wouldn’t shut the fuck up and kept giving Macaque shit FOR NO REASON- how tf can you call yourself someone’s friend and just keep calling them a coward when Controlling Shadows and Sneaking Around is LITERALLY THEIR STRONG SUIT. Imma make a fucking duck roast out of him

On the topic of Macaque homeboy made a fucking bootleg of wukong’s game XD with the ‘I just picked up a ‘how to draw anime’ book’ artstyle I love him so much and he’s so genuinely nice helping MK out with his issues I’m so happy. He came to cause havoc and slander Wukong and then the moment he saw Mk glitching out and struggling with his power he got serious. *Bangs my fist on the table* THIS MAN!!! *ahem* I am completely normal about this

On the flip side we are DISTRAUGHT over what happened with the demon bull family. I think my mom is gonna kill Azure for trapping Redson- we’ll tag team ‘em XD I love how much they genuinely adore each other. They fought against each other and fell in love enemies to lovers style I swear these are the best characters and they don’t even get touched on half the time It’s A Travesty

Also it annoyed me that Azure immediately blamed Mk for trying to get Wukong back and blamed him for the tablet breaking when HE WAS THE ONE TO SLICE IT- IT LITERALLY WOULDN’T HAVE BROKEN HAD THIS BITCH NOT WHIPPED OUT HIS SWORD. He’s so quick to judge others and is blind to his own hypocrisy, if he stopped for one moment to talk things out before hand things wouldn’t have gone bad but then he gets all sad that others didn’t act according to his plan. I can somewhat understand him but homeboy needs to take a step back and look inwards for a hot sec. I do appreciate that he was trying not to involve the group in the matter since they aren’t their ancestors, and let them choose to involve themselves though. So I kinda like him but his lackeys not so much, especially that fucking bird >:(

Also idk about anyone else but during S3 when Nezha (?)was teamed up with Mk -for like a single fight- my brain went ‘big bro vibes’. Cause I can’t not put everyone into the found family like a buncha dolls in my new lmk doll house XD but I’m excited to see how he’ll fit in the group dynamic and if he’s gonna be a bigger character next season. He seems really cool!

ALSO THE DRAGON- MEI’S DRAGON ANCESTOR- OMFG HE’S SO CUTE. Dude is adorable- they gave him oversized sleeves and he’s so chill XD 10/10 character design he was so nice homie was just chilling in the dungeon unbothered. ‘Just make a new sword? 🙂’ and he was so right- he’s so incredibly based I love his vibe and he was only here for like 5 minutes

#lmk liveblog #I looked it up and it seems S5 drops in December? hopefully #idk if my info is reliable #lmk spoilers #lmk season four

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addictedtostorytelling · 2 years ago

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I miss your csi insights so I thought I’d post a question…

What do you think Grissom meant when he asked Sara if she has completed her counseling?

I’m reading a fic and the author’s take is that Grissom doesn’t want to be part of a twelve step program for closure.

This question has really stomped me as to what Grissom meant...obviously everyone is allowed to have their own interpretation, but I'm interested to hear yours 😊

hi, anon!

so my take on that line is that grissom is trying to remove unnecessary guilt from sara.

i draw this interpretation not only from grissom’s body language and tone—while some fans read him as trying to shut her down, to me, he seems much too bright-eyed and forward with the way he’s talking to her to really be in that business here; as he says the line, he looks her right in the eye and nods at her encouragingly—but also from the wider gsr context of early s5 and where they’re at in their relationship trajectory at this point.

back in s4, grissom had been trying to impose arbitrary social distance between himself from sara in order to “set them both free;” however, he had been wildly unsuccessful in his efforts to do so, not only in the sense that he was never actually able to move on from sara emotionally or to encourage her to do the same from him but also insofar as he eventually ended up causing damage to sara by being so aloof/curt/harsh with her over the course of the year.

come the events of episode 04x23 “bloodlines,” he finally realized just how badly he’d stepped in it with her when she narrowly escaped getting a dui.

from there, he decided to change tacks: to step up and show her how much he actually did care for her, as opposed to trying (and failing) to pretend that he didn’t.

so going into s5, we see a much more open grissom when it comes to sara—one who is personally involved with her, who wears his heart on his sleeve, who not only unabashedly flirts with her but who is quick to remind her just how much she matters to him and to check in with her emotionally.

and, thankfully, it makes a world of difference: while all of sara’s life problems aren’t magically solved just because grissom is giving her the time of day again, she does really benefit from having his friendship and support, and their relationship at the start of the season especially is very strong, perhaps easygoing as it’s been since late s2.

so.

cut to episode 05x12 “snakes.”

on sara’s side of things, i think she’s looking at the last few months of interaction between her and grissom and going, “okay, so, i fucked up and scared the shit out of grissom with the whole drunk driving thing. immediately afterward, he felt like he had to be very hands-on with me and check up on me all the time. it took me a while to convince him that i didn’t need the kid glove-treatment, but now (after months of me toeing the line) i think he feels pretty confident in the fact that i am okay™—and not only okay but cool. i’ve shown him that i am capable of being friendly, collegial, chill, etc. honestly, things have been going pretty well for us. we’ve gotten to a place where we can be friends again. but now i have to be careful, because this is the point at which i would normally screw things up by coming on too strong with him. having his friendship again has been so amazing, and i don’t want to do anything to jeopardize it. i need to make sure that i don’t overstep, so i’m going to just talk to him and be up front—to tell him flat-out that i understand what’s what so he’ll know that i’m capable of maintaining the good status quo and not pushing.”

meanwhile, on grissom’s side, i think he’s looking at everything from the perspective that he was the one who was in error leading up to sara’s near-dui because he was being a weird, standoffish jerk who didn��t know how to manage his own hang-ups and emotions around her and that now it’s on him to “do penance” for it. while he knows he’s made progress toward being a better friend to sara ever since that turning point, he also feels as if the burden is still very much on him to finally do right by her. he knows he has a long way to go before he will finally undo all the damage he did to her self-esteem.

so then she walks into his office one day and starts apologizing to him for all sorts of things which he knows are not actually her fault, acting like she’s the one who’s not only to blame for the team split but also for whatever awkwardness there has been between them in the past (and, certainly, here, grissom can’t help but think about how he treated her during s4).

not only is she apologizing on professional grounds, but she’s also apologizing personally, insinuating that her personal feelings for grissom are part of the overall problem.

and, honestly—

grissom hates that he’s made her feel that way.

he’s given her such a guilt complex about their whole relationship dynamic, putting it in her head that she’s the one who’s been out-of-bounds, when in reality he’s been the one who’s been leading her on and confusing her and constantly changing the rules up on her for years.

so.

to break the interaction down:

sara comes into his office and leads off with, “we really haven’t had a chance to talk since the staff changes. i, uh—i wanted to let you know that i said some things to ecklie that might have done the team a disservice.”

grissom, quite sensibly and accurately, assures her, “ecklie wanted to break up the team, and he did.”

in no way is the team breakup her fault.

however, sara still feels (undue) guilt. she admits, “he asked me if you and i had had our post-peap counseling session—”

“—and we didn’t,” grissom acknowledges. however, the fact that they haven’t is hardly on her, and he tells her as much. “regardless, you should never have to cover for your boss. i’m sorry.”

here, sara’s façade of professionalism slips.

she starts to get personal.

very personal.

“you’ve always been a little more than a boss to me,” she tells him, offering a timid smile. “why do you think i moved to vegas?” she smirks, trying to play off the enormity of what she’s just said. however, grissom isn’t oblivious; he realizes the nature of what she has just admitted to—not only in the sense that she’s just told him she’s (still) in love with him, but also in the sense that she’s attempting to take the blame for their whole impossible situation, which is exactly what she tells him in the next breath. “look, i know our relationship has been complicated. it’s probably my fault. it’s probably definitely my fault.”

check out sara’s body language and tone here: she is so skittish, blinking a lot, stammering; the self-consciousness is rolling off of her in waves.

but here’s the thing: in the past (and particularly during s4), grissom might have allowed sara to feel as if her feelings for and behavior around him were the problem—that she was the one who’d been out of line; that they had so much trouble being “just supervisor and subordinate” because she couldn’t rein herself in and just act normal™ in his presence.

not now, though.

grissom knows that he’s the one who has spent the last four and a half years giving her the runaround, always keeping her at arm’s length from him while at the same time never letting her fully go. he’s sent her so many mixed signals. been simultaneously too much and not enough. prioritized his needs at the expense of hers. made her feel guilty about things that never would have even been an issue if he could have just been honest with her from the start.

so to hear her sitting there, castigating herself, making it out that she’s the problem—

all he can think is that she needs to know it isn’t her fault.

that she isn’t in the wrong.

they’re not in the right environment and he’s not quite brave enough for him to tackle the larger implications of what she’s said regarding their feelings for each other and the course of their overall relationship immediately in this moment. however, he can talk about the more micro-level issue—which in a way is symbolic of the larger thing, anyway.

“you, uh, completed your counseling, right?” he asks, and he’s trying to point out to her is that she hasn’t been remiss in anything; that there’s no reason for her to feel guilty.

he means to absolve her: not only did she complete her required counseling, just like she was asked to, but, lest she forget, she even tried to approach him to talk about it earlier in the year (see episode 05x01 “viva las vegas”).

—he’s the one who failed to follow up.

so when she can honestly answer yes, she did do all her sessions, he hopes that it will make her feel better.

he also hopes, when he asks her how her sessions went, that he’s repenting a bit of his misstep—finally doing now what he should have done back in september.

that’s been his whole mo with her, ever since he picked her up from the waiting room at pd eight months ago: to try to undo whatever harm he’s inflicted a little bit at a time, as much as he can; to apologize for the things he’s able to; to change his behavior and do better.

and his hope is that eventually he’ll get to a place where he’s not just in a position to try to make up for past mistakes but where he can proactively be the thing he needs her to be—where he can finally step up and be brave and own up to their feelings for each other in a way that would really mean something.

he doesn’t quite make it there in the course of this conversation—though, personally, i think that if sara had given him just a few more seconds before she got scared and cut the conversation off abruptly, he might have—but he’s definitely trending that way.

the very next episode is, of course, episode 05x13 “nesting dolls.”

he’s working up to finally saying what he should have told her years ago, to finally doing what he should have done years ago.

it’s a process.

“it’s not your fault” > “it’s my fault, and i’m sorry” > “now i’m going to do what i should have done before.”

anyway, that’s my take:

“you, uh, completed your counseling, right?” is grissom’s way of reminding sara that despite what she might think, she’s not the one who blew it. it’s him shifting the blame off of her and back onto himself—or at least that’s what he means it to be.

thanks for the question! please feel welcome to send another any time.

#answered #anon #asks: csi #**#my meta #meta: csi #meta: grissom #05x12 #let's talk shop #csiverse

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asseater3k · 1 year ago

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Metal Gear Mania Day 3

Game: MGS2

Major spoilers below the cut!

Today started with an unfortunate back to back case of forgotting to save I hadn’t saved the previous night after learning about the patriots and had to repeat the Nikita puzzle and acquisition before i went of to save Emma I did the Vamp boss fight and got to her and brought her back to the boss arena where I then accidentally cartwheeled into the death water and then accidentally pressed exit instead of continue so i had to repeat the boss fight and do the cool water level again. The E.E. Part of the game was welcomingly straight forward and simple after really getting blasted with patriot knowledge and especially in contrast of what’s to come I like Jennifer Hale in just about anything and she did a really good job here, enough to make me forget she was Naomi in the last game. She was charming enough though on a side not i found the conversations with with roses Mary weird at this point some of them make sense later and some of them didn’t I really didn’t like the one were she get jealous of Emma no real big judgment on the scene just made me uncomfortable as did a the serene where she’s dying and says stuff about her wanting otacon to see her as a woman and then otacon says he had affair with their mom both things I really want to gloss over. I did get pretty effected by Emmas death. A combo of seeing otacon just get totally ruined and myself being close with my siblings made me feel some type of way also final heroic gesture being ineffective or halted despite the effort they took always guts me in stuff since I was a kid and we got that with the computer virus, also The Fucking Handshake. Ive seen gifs of it before but when you hear the meta gear theme playing for the first time in the game and the emotions of the proceeding scene fresh it just hits in a such a way, and I think that might be the last normal cutscene in the game. The last like 40-50 minutes of this game is fucking insane. I talked earlier about the slow unraveling of threads and this point they take the spool and yank leaving you spinning. Revealing that Olga is Mr. X was pretty cool i dint see it coming but i also didn’t really think about Mr.Xs identity a lot and had zero theories still i really liked Olga by the end her kid being held by the patriots and her willing to get super own zoned because only raidens life signs needed to be up for her kid to survive was cool and I liked that it wasn’t like super overplayed and didn’t overstay its welcome. I like when a charter is like “oh I’ll for sure die to achieve my goals / save my friends” but is chill about it. The fucking Russian nesting doll of reveals on top of arsenal gear made me feel things I can’t articulate some combo of getting hype fro the reveal in terms of like narrative and gameplay execution and the first person bewilderment to match raidens. A while back my brother watched a documentary about Hawkeye a program used in tennis do determine out of bounds calls and some other stuff and he came back from it kinda shaken something about objective reality and perceptions of it or something I didnt get what he meant then. I think I do now. The last part of that game deals a lot with stuff about the self and personal identity and if we can really know anything about ourselves other or the world around us even though it leaves with an assertion that to an extent what we choose to believe and be is just as real as any objective truth, I really liked that the face of all these big uncertainties and questions from raiden snake just said “fuck that we are what we are our beliefs thoughts and actions subjective as they are make us people and people should and can do so much good if they put themselves to it”

The last things i want to talk about are how well done all the stuff with Campbell turning out to be an AI was and how the reveals of the s3 plan recontextualize the fucking design of the game. I talked at length yesterday about how effective Campbell is at creating this sense of unease in the early and middle parts of the game. I love scenes of layered flashbacks revealing stuff at the end of mystery stores and hearing Campbell acting goody towards the end and raiden saying how he realized he’d never met him in person gave me, the player on of those in real life every sitlted response every out of character action replayed in my head that was now also armed with the knowledge that the patriots have AI capabilities and I went nuts the best kind of mystery story telling lets you have these moments and similar things happened to my brain during the first s3 plan reveal. The fact that the game having a lot of similar set pieces moments and structure to the first went from an understandable if unremarkable product of making a sequel to making real diagetic sense and having a naritive purpose is insane. Ive never seen a game weaponize the fact that during gameplay you’re at some point going to see things as they which is to say designed by a person. That’s just a fact of the experience its not good or bad it just is but using that as a part of the story is geniuinly brilliant and some of the best example of something very uniquely suited to the medium

That’s about all I have I dont think i was able to put my feelings into words as well as i was yesterday but thats most likely cause so much of them are still very fresh and raw right now

If your able you should absolutely play MGS2 its one of the best games Ive played in a while and I’m so unbelievably excited to move on to

#metalgearmania #mgs2 spoilers #excited for 3 haven’t played it outside of the dress up sequence on my brothers 3ds copy ages ago

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mirrorballwhoistrying · 1 year ago

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The month of Mental Health Awareness (08.06.2023)

May is the month of mental health awareness, funny how that was also the month that I was and still am mentally at my lowest.

Coming back from Vietnam, life didn’t slow down that much. We were preparing to go to KS trip. I don’t know why I can’t behave normal at all around people I’m attracted to. Especially, when that person is not available. What the hell?

It was the trip with the company but V brought her bf. He’s the typical perfect good guy that takes care of everybody. Too bad, I lack the stupid skill to make friends with guys. I felt a sense of emptiness. What was I trying to do exactly? Cause a scene? Tried to make a show to get some attentions from available guys? What was I thinking? Was I trying to prove how good I am just so to “show” I’m a worthy person that got to know to? I don’t know, well the trip ended and I’d never see him again, and why did I make this whole company trip experience about him anyway? The trip was fun and I took some nice photos. Then boom, my mom asked me to go to VN for health check-up the very next week, while I also need to start the first session for M4I. Like Can I get a break? I agreed to go to VN with mom anw. and what the hell? I suddenly got an email about the AFP interview?! Make it make sense! I also had like only 2 days to prepare for the interview!

I drafted the answers. It took me quite awhile. I tried to reach out to alumni. Too bad the time was really short and I couldn’t get much done. The interview didn’t go as well as I expected. The judges looked bored. One of the judges made it clear that they don’t want the interview to be too scripted. Too bad I’m a robot and don’t have much personality. I said I don’t care about AFP anymore. but I still f-cking care! The whole interview kept replaying in my head for awhile!

I also bought a new pair of glasses. It didn’t look too good on me. Another episode of me making rush decision.

I went to the first session of M4I. It was cool to meet all these amazing people. It’s something I’m going to look forward next few months. Except the crack between our team is showing. The thing is I got to meet and talk to b VV. I was truly inspired how chill he was and how he started his page! He did all his videos on CapCut!

I went to Vietnam without much expectation. I know my energy was really low. I wasn’t energetic at all. I planned to sneak out at night but I was too tired already. I don’t know. I feel like I’m 17 all over again around my relatives.

The good part was talking to J K and got to hear her stories, struggles and encouragements. She’s the reason why my parents are less worried about my career although they don’t know much. It’s so emotional to hear her stories and struggles. I wish her all the best.

The days after coming back from VN, my life didn’t get any much better. My mental health was at it’s lowest. I wanted to consult the therapy but it was too expensive.

I forgot to address the elephant in the room. CH stopped messaging me. I should have seen the sign after the first date. He became less and less responsive. Seems like I can’t keep anyone in my life. Why it affected my self-esteem so much? Was the problem about me? Or maybe I should focus on a good version of myself before expecting people to come and stay in my life? Or maybe I should take things less personal and think of more about compatibility.

I also went to Pride Fest. It was okay. Funny how my senior saw me there and texted me online. Well, I can’t seem to keep any connection going.

This month is my birthday month and it makes me depressing than ever. On a good side, one of my videos reached 100K views on Tik Tok and I posted my first vlog too. The worst part is my freelance work. I owe Chef N’s work for quite some time now.

I also spent the first week of June, stressed myself out to complete 2 applications which I think I might not likely get selected at all. It really took a toll on me mentally.

I feel like this month is like an epilogue. Wait last month I said it was an epilogue too! Well, I feel like it’s a transition phase. I plan to post videos on FB soon, while I haven’t edited the videos.

Seem like a lot happened this month but doesn’t guarantee much good things. I feel so empty before my birthday. I’m a living death currently. I think I’m going to focus more on freelance work and my page more in the next couple months.

I just want to be happy!

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seireitonin · 8 months ago

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Idk how or why my name is being dragged into this and idk much about what’s going on w tomb and his gf??? But I’ll say this: I’m a very emotional person. Ppl didn’t just shit talk me in private as I’m just discovering now, but ppl also indirected me and made hate posts about me. And it just made me so hurt and sad. It reminded me of how the Creepypasta fandom was back in the day when it was full of drama and I hated it. I also just hate being involved in drama/ conflict of any kind. It’s sad bc I thought me and OutKast were cool bc we are/ were mutuals and I didn’t shit talk anyone. (My video wasn’t aimed at anyone specifically so I don’t think that counts as shit talking)And I didn’t know that they were shit talking me w other ppl. I didn’t deserve hate over a lighthearted video stating my opinion about a ship made over a decade ago. What I should’ve said is “I’ve had bad experiences with ticviwork fans” because I have. And it’s happening again:( im so sad that I associate ticciwork with SOME ticciwork fans being mean af to ppl. As I mentioned before I have autism so maybe my tone/ language was off in the video and for that , I apologize. But the hate against me was unwarranted. I would normally try to not say anything and just move on, but if I’m being honest, this just really hurts my feelings. And ik it’s the internet and no one is obligated to care about my feelings. But really I’m not even mad. Just really hurt. That whole “situation” hurt my feelings because I get really anxious when ppl are mad at me. I just want to talk about my special interest and chill. Idk. Anyway me and Tomb literally talked everything out the same day and it should’ve ended there. Idk literally anything about Tombs personal drama and I’m only speaking for myself. But again, finding this out just honestly hurts my feelings, especially bc I really like OutKasts art :(. (Idk about any “drama” besides the one me and tomb had and it ended the same day so everything else mentioned in this post idk about!) . To all my followers please be nice to each other. That’s all I ask atp. I also know that me saying them hating me hurts me and being vulnerable like this isn’t the best idea because it’ll give ppl more room to mess with me. But I just want to be honest in saying I’m very a very emotional person and my feelings are just so hurt. And over something as small as a ship :( (I’m not speaking on/ researching ANY drama mentioned here not involving me bc don’t want to be involved. Idk anything about Tombs drama, OutKasts or literally anyone else’s. I’m speaking for me and only me and my feelings so don’t ask me about anything else mentioned. Also don’t hate on all ticciwork fans, not all of them are like this. God I hope none of this comes out wrong TLDR: my feelings are hurt and it’s making my anxiety flare up kinda lol)

My call-out post on Necroromantics (Tomb)

Necroromantics on tumblr here has done nothing but be kind n supportive to all the ppl outkast, angelwowings n all those ppl have harassed and called names like freak, dm'd horrible things to, shittalked ppl who arent even friends w tomb.

Heres all the horrible things he says to ppl 🥺. Heartless monster!

Even after all theyve done w the death threats n the bullying and harassment all he does is try to move past it n be a better person n look out for others. How dare he!!

N as someone w bpd dont get me started on how he treats me. Its so abusive how he always makes sure im alright n reassures me constantly. N how ive dated him for 4 yrs n have seen his growth. Despicable! How dare a mentally ill person have times where they dont follow social norms n act on whats right/wrong omfg.

Lets cancel him for having bipolar next. Or is that too obviously ableist? No bc we cant say we're cancelling him for being manic we js have to cancel him for what he does while manic right? Bc thats how it works? Nd lets lie and ignore his paragraph form apology bc we dont care abt him actually getting better, we js care about the drama!

Lets not even start on how he put in the effort to talk to Seireitonin(?) during their mini "drama" to talk things out w her while all of u guys shittalked her in private and tried to create more drama while tomb wanted to hear her out. Or how ppl have come out n said that outkast n angelwowings r literally weird as fuck to other ppl who lack empathy.

Or should we talk abt how its so morally wrong that tomb lacks empathy n cant care abt ppls issues? Say that abt people with NPD too then. Not js the watered down versions u guys see on fuckin tiktok or tumblr. Accept ppl with NPD and ASPD n every other disorder where u cant experience empathy. Keep calling tomb ableist for not understanding social norms when ur actively hiding behind the "good victim" act js so u can be ableist towards him too. At least tomb had the balls to fuckin apologize to u nd still fuckin wish u all well.

Wtv this is literally so dumb. I know tomb very well n i would not fuckin put up with him if he was a bad person. He is literally so sweet n a good guy who hears ppl out and wants peace in life. I have seen him w his little sister how hard he tries for her. Ive seen how hard he tries w his friends, n with me even when my bpd acts up. U guys dont even fuckin know him n ur manipulating everyone w cropped screenshots n not saying how much u guys have bullied, threatened, manipulated, n harassed him. Ur pathetic

#creepypasta #creepypasta fandom #seiretonin #creepypastahcs #creepypastahc

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aggravatetheaxe · 3 years ago

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Hey! Saw your post and saw you said you were upsettie spaghetti so I wanted to cheer you up!

Slashers who stop everything they’re doing because their “My S/O needs me” senses are tingling and go to their rescue to comfort their angry s/o?

I was hoping to come up with A way for you to get your emotions out through your writing- 😅

Hope you feel better! 🖤

I've never done a post in this style before so hopefully I do okay! I think I covered pretty much all the slashers I write for so far (I didn't do Billy Lenz because I still need to read the novelization). I may have gone way overboard, so if I do these in the future, I'll probably just pick a few instead of doing the whole roster 😅 (or you can pick for me). But doing this much work did distract me!

Above the cut:

Bo Sinclair

Vincent Sinclair

Lester Sinclair

Included below the cut:

Michael Myers (OG)

Jason Voorhees

Leslie Vernon

Thomas Hewitt

Bubba Sawyer

Brahms Heelshire

Erik ("The Phantom")

Deacon Billings (OC Ghostface)

Courtney Dwayne Delmont (OC slasher)

Kathleen Montgomery (OC slasher)

Masterlist

***

Bo Sinclair

Despite being autistic, Bo is very in tune with peoples auras and body language. He has to be to manipulate and deceive people with any modicum of success. He's trained himself when it comes to these things; even besides masking or manipulation, he needed to be keenly aware of when his parents were in Bad Moods so he could either avoid them or prepare himself.

The mood he's probably best at when it comes to this, for those reasons, is anger. He can smell anger a mile away. So if you're fuming, you better believe he notices.

At first he's annoyed and will demand to know what your problem is. He's not a very tolerant person, and he can be a bit of a hypocrite. He's allowed to have big, messy feelings, but when it comes to others having big, messy feelings ... he's not so comfortable with that. He gets overwhelmed.

Once he realizes that this is more than an attitude problem, he'll take it much more seriously. And assuming you're not mad at him, he'll want the rundown on the whole situation from beginning to end. He wants all the dirt.

He'll let you rant, and honestly, he'd think you being this angry (when it's not directed at him, but even still sometimes) is kind of sexy. And don't expect him to shut his mouth, either; he'll be ranting right along with you, affirming you and insulting whomever/whatever you're angry about.

He doesn't wanna cuddle. He genuinely thinks you can't cuddle anger away. He'll put on some loud-ass music and let you vent your frustration however you prefer. Maybe suggest a long drive down to the lake or into town or just ... picking a direction and going. He has fantasies of running away from his anger sometimes. He knows how it is.

Depending on what you're angry about, it could definitely get to the point where he's angrier about the situation than you are. And if it really hurt you, he will not let it go as long as he lives. The best he will ever do is maintain a grudging neutrality or distance from the person/situation that made you angry.

He's very protective. If you're angry at someone you need to maintain a relationship with, you're going to have to keep an eye on Bo to make sure he doesn't deliver revenge for you behind your back. If it's something he can solve, he'll do it, so if you don't want him running his mouth, watch him.

Vincent Sinclair

Vincent is in the same boat as Bo when it comes to sensing auras, though his handle on body language and facial expressions is not as keenly honed. While Vincent was not physically abused as brutally or as often as Bo, this wasn't because of some sterling quality he had that Bo lacked. He was always The Good One because he saw what his parents did to The Bad One and knew he needed to protect himself. He tried not to do anything that might provoke his parents.

You can feel anger before a fight like you smell ozone before a storm. Vincent is attuned to the feeling not just because of his parents but because of Bo's temper, too. Because of this, like Bo, he can very accurately sense anger in particular.

His initial reaction is to observe you, gauging if you need time to cool off. If you need space, Vincent is the Sinclair for you. He's used to being quiet and deflecting and riding out anger.

However, once he realizes that your anger is not directed at him or isn't explosive enough to become a problem for him, he's concerned. Rather than asking what happened, he will ask if you're okay, and leave it up to you whether you'll tell him about it or not.

If you vent, he'll sit and listen patiently, maybe even thoughtfully working on a sculpture while you rant. He's not judgemental and he can be very emotional himself, so you could say the most ridiculous, dramatic things and he wouldn't even bat an eye. Let out all your messy, destructive thoughts and feelings. Just try not to throw or punch anything; that's when he shuts down.

If you decide you just want comfort, or decide you need comfort after ranting, art is his first suggestion. It may seem cold to you at first, that his instinct isn't to hold you or kiss you but rather to redirect you to a project - once you got to know him, however, you'd know that's his most genuine way to show he cares. Redirecting to something creative calms him down more than platitudes ever could, and he wants that for you. He's nonjudgmental about the art you create as well, even if it's objectively terrible. It's not about the quality.

He won't turn you down if you need physical affection, however. His twin is extremely tactile, so it wouldn't be the first time he held someone after a breakdown. He prefers to do this if he's certain you won't lash out physically, but if you were in a really bad way and needed to be touched, he'd do it regardless.

Lester Sinclair

Lester witnessed his parents' anger, but it was usually indirectly; if Bo was the Bad One and Vincent was the Good One, he was the Overlooked One. He's not a perfect person, probably not even a good person, but of the three brothers, he's the most normally socialized. He isn't trained to be tuned into everyone's every shifting mood in order to survive.

It takes Lester a little longer to pick up on your anger than his brothers, but not too much longer. It takes him a couple tries at trying to talk to you or get your attention before he realizes something is really wrong.

His first reaction is to get upset. He soaks up emotions like a little sponge, so he's suddenly cranky, too. He also jumps to conclusions and assumes that you're angry with him, and he does not take rejection well. He might be bitter and passive aggressive. You being angry just makes him want to go in another room and not be around you, and yet at the same time, he wants your reassurances. It's messy and sad.

Once he realizes - either through observing you or through you communicating with him - that you're mad at another person or situation, then he'll feel comfortable enough to approach you and ask you about it. You'll definitely need to reassure him that you're not mad at him though.

If you wanna rant, he'll take you on a long drive and let you vent your heart out to him. He won't be quite as aggressive as Bo, but he'll be on your side, frowning with disapproval, telling you "Ya can't fix stupid." If you want only comfort or need comfort after venting, he feels much more equipped for that. He'll put something relaxing in the VHS or let you play his old Super Nintendo, get you a beer, just let you chill out. And he'll let you win at Doctor Mario.

If the situation is something really serious, you best believe he'll be talking to his brothers about it the second he gets a chance. He may be a sweet guy, but he can be real nasty, and he doesn't fuck around when it comes to you. You might have to keep an eye out to make sure he doesn't tell someone off or punch out someone's lights.

Michael Myers (OG)

In 1978, Michael is not very in tune with any emotions besides fear, and even then he only really understands it in an abstract way, as his condition and upbringing haven't really been conducive to him learning about emotions. Unless you're screaming in terror, have tears running down your face, or are shouting angrily, he really can't read your moods. Without any obvious change to how you normally act or look, there's a huge chance he might just not notice if you're angry. He spends a lot of time in his own little world.

In 2018, even though he's spent over 50 years institutionalized, Michael has had time to take in the world, and he's seen a lot more. He understands fear much more than he did when he was 21, but what he understands most of all is anger. His anger fuels him. He would pick up on yours right away and be curious, though he wouldn't verbalize it.

If you tell him how you feel, he'll take note of it. If he witnesses you doing something destructive because of your anger, he'll simply observe. He would be fascinated with this thing you're doing, because it's not something you normally do, and though he might not notice emotions, he certainly notices routine and pattern. Either way, you'll have to tell him how you feel, because he'll simply watch you otherwise.

One thing that can be said for Michael is that he's a good listener. He may not internalize everything you say, but he will remember what he thinks is important. You may be surprised; he may remember tiny little details that seem inconsequential to you but loom large in his mind.

Unless you were caused serious physical or mental harm, he would not be angry on your behalf. He would, however, do nothing to assuage your anger. He thinks it would be kinda neat and interesting to see you snap. He's not 100% sure why you don't just do it.

In 1978, he won't be much help beyond listening to you, but he would be curious to see what you do to vent your anger. You may find him by your side more often, observing you. He may also want to find and observe the object of your anger, especially if it's a person. In 2018, he would, in his own way, suggest you solve the problem by murdering someone/something. He's insatiable, but killing is the closest he's ever come to satisfaction. You should try it.

Jason Voorhees

Out of all of the slashers, Jason is the most likely to actually literally sense your anger, especially if you're psychically sensitive/powerful like Tina Shepard. I'm talkin'—assuming you have a pre-established relationship—he'll be doing something else and just get this itch that tells him you're out there somewhere, pissed off.

Obviously this is untenable. As long as he's not super busy or Pamela has other plans, Jason will stomp his way through the woods to get back to you, regardless of the urgency of your anger. If Pamela doesn't approve, well, he'll let a little anger go and assume you're okay. If he suspects you may be in danger, though, he's sprinting regardless of what Mom says. There's time for both things, Ma!

The first thing he'll do when he returns to you is scan your dwelling, then you, making sure nothing is broken. At that point, you'd probably be able to sense his confusion even without him signing. Jason doesn't experience emotions quite like a human anymore, and he's quite tactile besides, so a lack of tangible or visible clues as to why you're upset would trip him up for a second.

He doesn't want to comfort you at first, he wants to know what's wrong. He'll listen to you vent only long enough to understand the situation and identify his target. His immediate next move would be to eliminate the problem. You'll definitely have to hold him back, and it may take a bit of convincing. Earthly consequences don't really apply to him.

Before comfort comes blowing off steam, for you and for him. His first choices would be mangling some trees (you can pretend it's for firewood) or skipping/throwing stones into the lake. You're welcome to join him if those things calm you down; watching him get his stone to skip like 11 times on Crystal Lake may make you feel better, at least.

You might hang out there for hours before he suddenly decides it's time to go home. He'll do what he can to make your comfortable or stay out of your way while you make yourself comfortable, then comfort you as you please. His go-to choice is always foot or hand massages.

Leslie Vernon

Leslie is extremely observant and surprisingly analytical given how silly he is in the day to day. His intuition makes it pretty easy for him to read people, but especially you, since you two are so close. Especially-especially if you're his Survivor Girl (gender neutral term of course). You two are in sync, so he knows if something's up. Maybe even before you fully figure it out.

God, you're so hot when you're angry, you really are. He almost wants to let you scream and holler and go nuts. But he prefers you only get angry like that at him, especially if you're his Survivor Girl, so his first move is to comfort you or talk you down to a place where you can be comforted. He'll speak to you calmly and rationally, reassuring you and touching you if you wanna be touched—on your upper arms or shoulders or face, or with one arm around your back.

He doesn't just want to comfort you, though, he wants to calm you down enough that you can tell him what happened. Even if you claim you don't want to talk about it, he will coax it out of you eventually. He's gotta know what got you so upset. It's his business to know everything about you!

Assuming you're angry at someone/something that isn't him, he'll talk it through with you. If you're upset about an argument with someone, he has the capacity to see it from the other side, but ultimately, he's there for you. He'll let you bitch as much as you want, still touching you, and he'll be disgusted and/or disappointed with the situation.

Above all, though, what he wants is to see you smile again. The only worries on your mind should be the ones he comes up with, and man, he's not even halfway done grooming the next batch of unlucky teenagers. He'd pat your face or touch your hair and tell you to cheer up, and probably defuse the situation with a stupid quip or joke. Take you out somewhere fun, maybe.

Once you were cheered up, he'd humbly suggest you solve your problem with a little murder. "I mean, I know killing's not really your thing—you're really good at it, though, a talent! You know that..." Pause, considering you. "You want me to do it? 'Cause I can clear my schedule for the rest of the night." If you decline, he'd be like "Suit yourself" but may or may not still murder whoever upset you. If you agree, he'd be super excited to make a romantic night of it. His mind would be going a million miles an hour planning everything out.

Thomas Hewitt

Tommy knows anger when he sees it. Not only does he have loads of internalized anger, he's been on the receiving end of it plenty. He's far too large to be scared of anyone in a physical sense anymore, but he's been shouted at countless times. To know when to shut up and do as he's told versus arguing back, he's learned to gauge intensity and direction of anger, and he well knows that anger can be redirected to him.

So, he instantly recognizes your mood, but it might be a while before he approaches you. When he does approach, he'll let you decide what to do, whether that's throwing your arms around him or banging your fists on his chest to vent your anger. You won't hurt him.

Eventually, once you're all hugged or cried or screamed out, he'll wrap his arms around you and give you a reassuring squeeze. There's no need to tell Tommy what's wrong—he won't ask unless you're obviously in serious distress or injured—but if you decide to speak, he'll listen, brows drawn tightly the whole time. He's thoughtful about the situation.

If you're mad at someone in his family, there isn't much he can do for you besides comfort you and assure you that whoever upset you—Hoyt, probably—didn't mean what they said. If you were hurt physically, it would be another story, but his family gets in shouting matches all the time.

Rather than offering help, he'd wait for you to request it of him. Whatever you ask, shy of hurting his family, he will do. Murder someone? No problem. Make you some food? You got it. Bring you a blanket? Sure. Give you some quiet alone time? That's fine, too.

If you need to vent, he's got plenty of ways to get out your frustration. Plenty of farm work to do, or you could work on something around the house with him. He might suggest knitting or sewing or some other handicraft you enjoy. It always makes him feel better to buckle down and use his hands for something.

If you're still preoccupied/upset by the time you two bed down, or heaven forbid the next morning, then he starts taking it more seriously. Something that disturbs you for that long is bad news. He'll watch you carefully the next couple days to see how you're doing, waiting for you to need him for something.

Bubba Sawyer

Like Tommy, Bubba has been on the receiving end of anger many, many times, so he's familiar with what it looks and feels like. Despite his size, he's still susceptible to physical violence at the hands of his loved ones, so he's very wary of anger.

However, he doesn't have a female presence in his life like Luda Mae, who expresses her anger through passive aggression—so, he's more used to shouting and screaming. If you aren't prone to screaming and shouting, it might take a little bit for him to realize you're not just sad or upset, you're angry.

Bubba will be over you. He'd give anyone else their space because he'd be afraid of retaliation, but you're his special person, and he's pretty sure you're not going to hurt him. He'll touch your hair, your arms, your wrists; he'll babble as he tries to figure out what's wrong. He just wants to comfort you and let you know everything is all right.

If it's too much or you're overwhelmed and you snap at him, he'll ease back. He'll blubber like a kicked puppy, but he won't give up. He'll still try to comfort you, just in other ways, such as getting you a comfort item or article of clothing, or maybe some food. And boy will he helicopter.

There's no need to tell Bubba what's wrong. In fact, it might be better if you didn't; if it's something he can't fix, it would do nothing but majorly stress him out. If it was one of his family members who upset you, as with Tommy, he wouldn't be able to do much. Even if you were hurt, he's just not in a position to stand up for you. That fact would absolutely kill him, though. He'd end up getting even more upset than you.

He doesn't know what help to offer you beyond comfort, but like Tommy, if you requested something specific, he'd try to carry out your wishes. He'll also try to cheer you up with some music and dancing, or just being silly like you like.

Need to blow off steam? He's got plenty of coping mechanisms! Bubba's idea of a perfect de-stress session is turning up the radio and getting lost in crafts. He's got lots of supplies, mostly to create clothing and accessories, and you're special, so you can have your pick. A drive and the radio might be nice, too. If neither of those appeal to you, he'll try cooking or baking with you. He loves sharing the kitchen with someone.

If none of that works and you're still upset, be prepared, because he's gonna be an anxious mess until you're better.

Brahms Heelshire

Brahms is somewhat familiar with other people's anger. He certainly has a whole fountain of internalized anger brewing just beneath the surface, but that's different. He knows that when Mummy is angry, she yells and cries, and when Daddy is angry, he seethes and stews. The former would be obvious to him, but the latter would take him a few minutes to be quite sure about. You're not acting how you usually do. Are you being stern or are you angry? Are you cross with him?

He does not have a lot of empathy for other people, so if your anger gets in the way of his routine or the attention he wants, he'll be irked, cranky, sad. Not necessarily at you—though that is possible—but the situation in which you find yourselves.

Much like Bo, he's allowed to have big, messy feelings, but it makes him uncomfortable and scared when other people have those feelings. He might even hide from you for a while, especially if you screamed and cried.

Once he realizes something is really wrong and you're not mad at him, however, he'll start thinking of ways to cheer you up so things can go back to normal. He hates having his routine interrupted; he's very particular. And he cares for you, so seeing you in distress is very scary and uncomfortable for him.

He'll start by fetching you something you like—something manageable for him like your favorite juice or a sandwich, or if you have a special item or article of clothing, that. He's quite shy, though, and like I said, he'll probably be hiding, so he'll leave it somewhere he knows you'll find it (on the bed, outside your door, on your desk, etc.)

If that doesn't calm you down and your anger is really getting in the way of his routine, or otherwise making him uncomfortable, he'll finally make an appearance. Very bashful and timid at first, using his little boy voice. "What's wrong, Y/N? Did something bad happen?"

If it's something that can't be helped, he'll suggest you do something together to take your mind off it (most likely something he likes to do). He may even be coaxed into taking a walk around the grounds, though he doesn't like to leave the manor at all, so you'd have to convince him. He prefers quiet playtime, maybe some coloring books or loud music to vent your emotions. It would intrigue him to see someone else use his toys to calm down. As long as you recognized he was being very nice, sharing them.

If it was an argument you had with someone, he would want more information. Are they likely to leave you alone, or will they come to the manor? Will he have to deal with them? Because it's scary, but he'll do it for you.

If, for some reason, none of those things work, he may cry or throw a fit. Either way, he'll be frustrated. Adult Brahms may make an appearance and try to help you in more Adult ways.

Erik

Though he lives five cellars beneath an opera house now, Erik hasn't always been entirely reclusive. Even these days, when he can stomach it, he sometimes goes out to see the world. As a younger man, he observed people's lives and moods with a hungry fascination (that has now mostly been replaced by melancholy and longing and bitter anger). Like several of the other slashers here, he's had to train himself to sense fury to protect himself. He's also incredibly wrathful, so you could call him an expert!

He has a very keenly honed sense when it comes to you specifically, since he's watched you so much. He notices the change in your demeanor immediately.

If you know him as the "Angel of Music," his voice will appear to you once you're alone, asking you what's wrong and assuring you you can confide in him—he will insist you tell him, though. "There are to be no secrets between us, Y/N." He will listen without interjection as you vent your heart out, and when you're done, soothe you. Don't let his calming voice deceive you, though; behind that mirror, he's seething, planning to take matters into his own hands.

If you know him as Erik, he will go to you the second he recognizes the shift in your mood and take you from what you're doing, regardless of your wishes. He'll sit you down, kneeling before you with your hands in his, and gaze into your eyes, imploring you to tell him what's wrong. He'll absolutely allow you physical comfort, but he will also absolutely insist you tell. He'll need reassurance that you're not angry at him, because that thought would break his heart.

He will let you vent however you wish. You could have the most dramatic breakdown ever—throwing things, beating your fists on his chest, wailing—and he wouldn't judge you. He would be awfully concerned, though.

Will be 110% on your side. You are his poor little meow meow. "My poor love, my poor Y/N!" He is beside himself with sympathy for you and you only, and is very offended on your behalf.

He will always suggest music as an outlet for your anger, but he will have taken note of your other hobbies and interests as well. He'll fetch your things for you without being asked, as long as it won't separate him from you for very long. If you'd rather just have comfort, that's fine, too. He could hold your hand and caress your face for hours on end under normal circumstances, so no problem there. He may also suggest a little time on the surface, if you normally live in his home. Fresh air will do you both good, he reasons, and he enjoys spending time with you where others can witness it. It fills him with pride and love.

Otherwise, he's at your service for any other soothing activities you need. A calming bath, some sweets, shopping, anything. Perhaps avoid asking for any sexual contact, however. First of all, being asked directly makes him very skittish and nervous; second of all, his method of love-making (when you can coax him) is very intimate and tender, which may be tedious if you're in an angry mood.

Unless the situation is extremely serious or dire, his first priority is making sure you're soothed. Once that duty is fulfilled, however, he is absolutely angrier about it than you are. If it's not that serious, he won't skip straight to killing, if only because he knows it upsets you. He will definitely be writing an extremely strongly worded letter, however. If someone slighted you seriously, they're getting threatened. If someone hurt you physically, they're meeting the Punjab lasso.

Deacon Billings (OC Ghostface)

Deacon definitely knows when people are angry. His step-mom was a passive-aggressive laundry-folder and his dad was a storming out of the house kinda guy; when the two of them were together, they were all hushed but heated arguments at night when they thought he couldn't hear them, or else extremely embarrassing passive-aggressive arguments in public. Growing up, he found himself around a lot of angry people. And there's no shortage of anger in him, either.

So yeah, Deacon knows when people are pissed, and he knows when people are pissed at him. The thing is, he just thinks it's fucking hilarious. He was that kid that would goad peers and teachers just to be an asshole and had virtually no friends as a result. He's a menace on the internet, too: a horrible troll for no reason, stirring the pot even when he doesn't have a stake in the argument. He's trained himself to find people's weak spots so he can strike at them. He does it to make himself feel more in control of his life and his own anger.

So when you're ticked off, he's gonna notice the change immediately. If you made a vent post on social media, he probably knows you're angry before you even see him. He follows all your social media (even if you don't realize it) and checks it constantly. He'd call you out of curiosity to ask what happened. He's open about his stalking tendencies: "I saw your post, babe, who do I need to stab?"

If you otherwise come home angry, he'll be up on his feet, following you around the house and pestering you, trying to get you to tell him what's wrong. If you try to hug him, he won't push you away, but he'll be distracted, trying to needle answers out of you the whole time.

There's no question in his mind as to whether or not you're angry at him. He just assumes you're not; he has a pretty good handle on how you act when you're angry at him specifically.

He'll let you rant all day if you want. You could talk about the shit that's pissed you off for hours and he'd still listen. Outwardly, he might poke you a bit and play devil's advocate for the other side of the argument, if there is one. This is purely for the purposes of being a little shit.

Internally, he's already going down his pre-murder checklist. If it was someone at work, they're dead. Someone in the neighborhood, dead. Online? It'll take a couple days, but they're dead. Even if you're not angry at anyone in particular, just a situation, he'll find someone to menace. He'd walk through fire for your approval.

He's not good with soft, emotional comfort, so instead he'll try to think of something to help you let off steam. His go-to is something competitive, especially if it involves you chasing each other. A Nerf or water gun war, a PVP game with you on opposite sides. He'll put up a good fight, but you always kick his ass.

Once the immediate situation is addressed and you've ranted your heart out to him, he can't keep his hands off you. "Seeing you all pissed off drives me crazyyyyyy." He's grinning, brown eyes sparkling. "Come onnnnn ... I'll get it off your mind!"

Courtney Dwayne Delmont (OC)

Courtney is a hunter of all manner of game, so he's used to interpreting non-verbal cues and body language—when an animal is in distress, when an animal is about to attack, etc. His grandfather was a very angry man, as well, in a simmering sort of way. He would seethe about something before suddenly delivering one decisive strike. Courtney himself is not a particularly angry man, unless some prey is really giving him a hard time, but he can read your body.

If you come home angry, he'll stop in the middle of what he's doing and watch you, still and quiet, just confirming his suspicions. If you leave the room he's in to go collapse on the sofa or something, he'll follow you, looming over you and waiting for you to tell him what's wrong. He's patient.

If you want to vent, he'll sit and listen thoughtfully, doing something with his hands while you speak—probably cleaning his gun or some other weapon. He doesn't look at you. He wouldn't demand greater context to the situation but he would ask "Why?" and "Who?" until he understood Enough.

If you want comfort, he'll sprawl on the couch and let you lay on top of him. He'll probably pull a blanket on top of you to try and encourage a nap. If the nap doesn't make you feel better, he's feeding you protein. Do you like homemade jerky?

Sex is also on the table (not literally ... unless). He's found it's a great way to blow off steam, and he's more than happy to make all worries, troubles, and other thoughts go away for a little bit. Expect that to be the rest of your night, though, because he doesn't do quickies.

Generally, he trusts you to handle your own shit, so he would be more focused on you than whatever made you feel the way you do. However, if days passed and you were still angry/upset/sad, or if it plunged you into a breakdown or was an otherwise extremely serious situation ... just give him a target. It's up to you, but if you tell him to take the shot, it'll be quick and clean. If you're unable to make the decision, he'll decide for you without hesitation.

Kathleen Montgomery (OC)

I'm still developing her so this one won't be as in-depth and is subject to change.

Kath makes it her business to know everything about you. Chances are she's seen you explode screaming while stalking you ... chances are, if you've been in a relationship for a while, she's made you explode screaming. She knows what you look like when you're angry. Besides, she's strong for her size, but she often has to take down people who are much bigger and stronger than her; she uses manipulation and trickery to help ease that divide, so she's good at reading people.

Like Deacon, she also monitors all your social media, so if you made a vent post, she already knows you're in a shitty mood before you come home. Unlike Deacon, she doesn't tell you how she knows, so you're left to assume she's just all knowing. Considering her god complex, that works for her.

She'd probably text you to come home, and she expects you to answer. If you're unable to come home, she'll call you to ask what's wrong.

Once you're together, she wants to know everything about the situation. Even as you're speaking, she's already on her phone or laptop, looking up the people involved. Instead of getting mad on your behalf, she laughs. She's a fan of emphasizing how pathetic or weak the opposition is.

She takes your feelings on the subject seriously, but everyone else in the situation? Insects. Not even worthy of your time or concern, let alone hers. You're obviously in the right here (even if you're not). She'll tell you as much, and say some pretty intense, over-the-line things about whomever/whatever you're angry at.

Overall, however, she's calm and collected about the situation. Your bout of anger is a chance to get you to be reckless with her. She'll do your hair and makeup and dress you up nice, then take you out. Fast driving, drinking, baiting people at bars, menacing neighborhoods ... maybe a little killing, if you'd like.

***

Masterlist

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bloodycassian · 3 years ago

Text

anon request - READER X AZRIEL - sorry if this wasn’t exactly what you want! I got a bit carried away in my own idea of Azriel being supportive but protective at the same time!

some hurt/comfort with Azriel where he and the reader get in a huge fight over protecting Elain (like they travel to a different court and Azriel is overprotective) and then the reader goes scouting to also cool down a bit and they get ambushed, the reader gets injured and the mating bond snaps. Hope it's not too much trouble!!

Elain was absurdly still as the conversation played out. Conversation being a loose term for the shouting happening around her. You didn’t leave her side though, even though your anger flourished while they spoke as if she wasnt there. Azriel was packing her things, shoving them haphazardly into a bag. The bag that Feyre had given her from their first trip down to the markets after Elain had started acting somewhat normal again. The happy memory seemed so distant now, compared to the anxiety ridden emotions that played about in the room.

“We are not going to the continent.” Az’s tone shift was abrupt, a snap of anger leaning into it. He tied the top of the bag closed and set it roughly atop the living room table. The scattered odds and ends of survival gear and weapons scraped against the wood. You watched the stare down between the high lord and his shadowsinger patiently. Waiting for your moment to speak rationally to them.

Rhys’ power roiled above, his eyes did not hide his frustration with his brother. His gaze was simmering with that dark power he possessed. Azriel did not back down. “The continent is the only place that may be safe. If the King finds out she’s a Seer he will never let her go. We can’t risk losing her as a hostage.”

You knew she would be a hostage too. Feyre would never let her sister be taken without a fight. Rhys knew his mate well enough to know not to risk just Elain, but Feyre too. Cauldron knew what Nesta would do if she were in that room during the conversation. Likely spitting fire and shoving Elain out the door to wherever she seemed to think was safe. Thankfully, both sisters were scouring deep in the library for any way to help win this battle.

Azriel did not break eyecontact with his brother as he made to speak again. You interrupted before he could make the situation worse. “I have somewhere in mind.” You spoke softly, urging the staring contest to end. Azriel looked away first, and you were surprised at that. His eyes met yours with something like relief. “Autumn. We have Eris on our side if we’re caught. I have a spot we can stay until-” Azriels scoff sent anger shooting through you. You clenched your teeth together to keep from lashing out at him as he had been doing just moments before.

“Autumn is possibly the worst place we could send you right now. We’re on the brink of war with them potentially being on Hyberns side. We would be sending you straight to Hybern himself.”

“Exactly. It’s stupid and they would never expect it.”

“You’re not going. Beron exiled you. Don’t you remember what that means?” He looked at you with actual concern now that he knew you were serious. As if you had been injured and you were speaking a different language.

“It means we will be safe from Hybern when they come here to look for Elain. Isn’t that the point?” You wrapped an arm around her small shoulders and pulled her close. Az couldn’t argue with that. The other courts were not an option, as it would be harboring a target against one of the Night court Allies. And Winter court was nowhere to be spending the night. Not many survived the night there without shelter.

Rhys’ sigh was long and exhausted. Left without another option, he nodded to himself. He held out a hand and summoned two necklaces, both with pendants of black onyx that shimmered in the firelight. Az’s brows pinched together at the sight of them. The dull glow behind him shone through his wings, highlighting all the delicate structures there. You found his wings more beautiful than the enchanted stone Rhys handed you.

“Hybern won’t be able to sense your magic. Keep these on.”

Azriel was already tensing, his fists balling at his sides ready to make it physical if Rhys refused to listen. He knew with his entire being that something was off. Something would go wrong this night. His shadows warned him of something. And he couldn’t shake it no matter how hard he tried. “Rhys-”

“And you will be going with them. Keep them company while Feyre and I investigate just how many ships and forces they plan to bring.” He ordered in that indisputable tone of the high lord. With only a hint of friendliness. He gave Az a long look before turning back to you and Elain. “Do not take those off.” The nodded to the necklaces and started to winnow. Elain stood abruptly, startling you.

“Thank you.” She said softly to the high lord. He seemed taken aback for a second, before giving her a gracious nod and finally disappearing. You rose to Elain’s height and took her hand in yours. It was warm, welcoming. “We’re going to be fine.” You promised, not caring if Azriel saw the care you gave her. She had been there for you just as you needed to be now. She had practically kept you alive with her soft humming and reading to you when you were at your worst after being exiled.

“I know.” She said, voice soft as rose petals. But that dark power within her were the thorns of that pretty, perfect rose. The reason Hybern even knew to look in Velaris for Elain. That cauldron calling power that she couldn’t control to save her life. You grimly smiled at her.

“We need to leave.” Azriel ordered, tone neutral. Just a warrior needing to move troops.

“Let me get your bag.” Elain said, giving you a squeeze of her hand, disappearing up the stairs. Leaving you with the brooding Illyrian. You grimaced in his direction. He ignored you as best he could, hoping that the time for babysitting would pass quickly. He had always found it strange how you and Elain moved like magnets together. Found the soft way you comforted each other somehow upsetting. He paced quietly in front of the fire while you gathered your gear. Two small blades - one for Elain - and your sword. You rubbed at a speck on the hard steel of the sword.

Perhaps his lack of family had made that rivaling jealousy turn into hatred for the display of affection. He contemplated to himself. Had he become cold to everyone? Too harsh? Had the darkness he possessed taken him over? He tore his eyes from your short sword and locked them with yours. The thrill he felt wasn’t from anger or terror. His cheeks flushed slightly and you fought the grin that you wanted so badly to flaunt at him. The innuendos regarding the sword that you wanted to say were cut off by that look he gave you.

“Do not get into a situation where you have to use that.” He warned with a stern look. You couldn’t help the angelic smile you gave him.

The smell of rotting apples and decaying leaves was all you needed to sense to know you were home. You took in the court border slowly, adjusting to your orientation after being winnowed. Elain clutched your hand tightly, the bag in her other hand quivered only slightly from her shaking. Your hands became slick with sweat at the familiar sights and smells of Autumn. You hadn’t been back since being exiled.

“We wont be able to have a fire.” Azriel stated, gazing towards the sky. It was far too clear of a day out to risk it. The slight chill in the air filled your stomach with dread for the night to come.

“This way.” You pulled Elain along with you, leaves crunching under your feet as you entered Autumn court. She didn’t move. Her eyes were blank, staring lifelessly into the orange and yellow forest. “Elain?” You asked softly.

“Five foxes will die tonight. Three more in the morning.”

Her words sent a chill down your spine.

Az took the lead, territoriality putting himself a few paces in front of you. He wasn’t subtle about it either, occasionally jogging ahead to scout for any enemies around piles of bramble when you came across it.

By the time you found your hideout, you were fed up with waiting for him to give you the all clear everywhere you went. You let you go of Elains now calm hand and stormed into the small shack with familiarity. Azriel hissed and seethed when you lit a lantern inside. “Get over yourself, Shadowsinger.” You laughed, taking in the small piece of home you made for yourself long ago.

It indeed was a long time ago when you’d last been there. But it still felt homey to you. The small space was just big enough for a stove, the table you’d found, and a bed pushed against the far wall. The fireplace hadn’t been used in years. Soot marked small animal prints along the light plank floors.

The dusty blankets on the makeshift bed were pocked with holes from mice and moths. The fireplace was nearly caved in on itself. The bramble covering that acted like a second roof was growing through the actual roof in some places. But it was still home. Your small exit from the world when things got too tough. Even after being exiled Beron hadn’t known about this place. He would have had it destroyed if he did know of it.

Elain pushed in passed Azriel. His shadows went wild. Searching every surface of the cabin. The long beams of the floor were hardly visible through the darkness he brought.

You knew you should have brought more blankets. You held back the teeth chattering as best you could, letting Elain sleep. She would need all the rest she could get. You could tell she’d been tired after the days walk. She rested peacefully under the layers while the wind shuddered the leaves outside. You pulled your coat tighter to your body.

“This was a stupid idea.” Azriel muttered from the corner. He didn’t seem cold, but the dark curls of shadow wrapped around him protectively. While you were left with nothing more than a coat. Your own magic couldn’t save you from the stormy wind, the necklace Rhys had given you also weakened your power enough that you couldn’t use it. Even in your homeland. It bothered you endlessly, feeling so useless in such a dire situation of needing to help Elain.

“Then maybe you should just leave.” You barked back simply. He didn’t have to come in the first place if he was going to be so bothered.

“I just mean-” He sighed, and sat on the creaky old table that took up half the small kitchenette. “We could have done this better. We could have planned… Differently.”

“We didnt have the time. We’re here now, so we just need to deal-”

“I know that. I’m just bothered that you’re so recklessly looking for danger everywhere we go.”

“What the hell is that supposed to mean? I’m from here Azriel. I know what areas are dangerous.”

“Maybe once.” His eyes were not angry when he said it. They were full of pity and doubt. Your rage spilled over, and you were ready to shout. Ready to scream at him about what a piggish idiot Illrian he was being. But Elain turned over, sighing softly to herself.

So instead, you clamped down on that burning anger and walked out. And of course he decided to try to follow you. He made it a few steps outside the cabin before you turned on him, ready to roar. “Be safe at least.” He tossed his red jeweled dagger to you. Your heart squeezed, choking you up slightly. You brushed it away as best you could before he could see. You couldn’t yell at him.

So you took the dagger and walked briskly away, into the brush of autumn forests. Laced with the smell of heavy fruits and warm trees. Leaves fluttering in your wake as the wind tossed with ease.

You held his knife close at your side the entire aimless walk. Then, the sound of twigs snapping and males laughing heartily made you pause.

Far to your east was a dull glow beyond a knoll. You backed away slowly. Trying to be as soundless as possible in case they could scent you. The breeze whipped at your skin, blowing in their direction. The trees above you shuddered sharply, and you swore as a heavy weight fell upon your shoulders.

Azriel paced in the kitchenette, his shadows swirling around him relentlessly, waiting for a target. It felt wrong letting you go. It felt like letting his hope sink. His shadows even seemed upset about it, as they now whipped around him angrily.

He swore he was going to run a rut through the plank floor. He sighed, glanced to Elain’s sleeping figure and forced himself to sit. You had the dagger. You were capable. You knew the area and knew what you were doing. He tried his best to soothe himself. It didn’t help much.

The old chair creaked under his weight, and he smiled. For someone who claimed they couldn’t work around the house, you were quite the crafter making such a nice hideaway for yourself. He finally took a moment to pause, and actually look at the cabin.

The stove may have been older than he was. The missing burners on top were replaced with a few forks placed carefully around them. The ancient shelves were dusty, along with all the jars and cups atop them. Cobwebs spotted the entire house, but his shadows had gotten rid of most of them after the first one clung to his face upon walking in.

Then he came to the table he sat at, the four unmatching chairs circling it. The table itself was solid oak, he could tell that much. But he wondered how you’d gotten it inside at all. Out of curiosity, he pulled on it. It didn’t budge. His eyebrows knitted together, and he stood slowly. The curiosity consumed him. He gave the table another tug. Still, no movement.

He crouched down, and noticed the planks around the single leg of the table had been cut out. Then he noticed the intricate roots weaving their way up the trunk. The table wasn’t just a table. It was an entire tree - or what was a tree once… And you’d built the entire cabin around it. His awe was quickly quieted by Elain.

“A part of you is missing. The foxes will die.” She muttered sleepily, her eyes blank. And he lay back down as if it hadn’t happened. “Elain?” Azriel called. Dread, cold and stinging coarse through him. “Elain?” He asked quietly, approaching her side. She flung the covers from her lithe body. Azriel jumped back, holding his hands up defensively. “It’s okay, its me.” He calmed her, noting the wild look in her expression.

“Find yourself.” She breathed, her eyes going wide with concern. Azriel’s heart sped, and he felt like he’d been dunked in a cold ocean of dread. Terror drug him under the deep waves and threatened to drown him the first chance it got. He took Elains hand and started walking the direction you’d left.

Leaving behind the supplies and the living table that you’d created.

A glance at the oversized uniforms told you all you needed to know. The fox sigil pinned to their tunics proved that the uniforms were stolen from Autumn soldiers. Your blood boiled. Elain had been right. But they would die. Five of them, at least. But you had only glimpsed at three so far. You tugged at the ropes that bound you. Firm, and not able to be broken.

Their campsite was large, and full of small boxes of different fruits. Several different types of weapons leaned against their low lying tents. And with how many scars their fae leader had, you knew the rest of their story in an instant. Bandits. Filthy trade merchants that lived for thievery and making a quick gold mark.

And you’d be worth their weight in gold once they turned you in to Beron.

“We’ve got a live one!” The male shouted to his comrades. They cheered drunkenly, their voices carried far by the wind. Their fire sparked and popped against the blue night sky. And you knew that your death may not come in glory of battle, or in the name of your home. But in being stupid enough to be caught by bandits. You could have died that instant if it would mean you didn’t have to feel that kind of shame.

The male cut the opal from your neck, and you felt your magic explode from you. Your thoughts were racing, searching. Finding something cold and dark in the depths of your mind and tugging on it. Then, it was a live beast beneath your mental hands. It coiled and rose, ready to strike.

The same one cut a long line down your cheek with the blade that had just cut your only protection against Hybern from you. You prayed to the mother that Hybern was too busy to notice a small blip of magic from an Autumn fae like you. You hissed in pain as the blade stung its way down to your neck, stopping at your collarbone.

You pulled on that coiling beast that called to you. Beckoned it to find you, to help you from this pain. Maybe you were begging for death, or at least unconsciousness so you wouldnt have to feel the pain anymore. The male stood back to let another scaled lower fae get a look at you. His tongue lashed out over your bloodied neck. He hummed in approval, letting his forked wetness slither across your wounds.

You felt them seal and itch with every pass as he took your blood. “Good.” the one with the blade ordered, then… to your dread, he pulled a glowing rod from the fire. They would brand you. Then take you to the high lord. Only after they’d humiliated you though. The males clucked at your involuntary reaction. They huddled close around, waiting for the screaming to start. Their excitement coated the air with a tangy adrenaline filled scent.

You reared away from the burning metal as best as you could. The ropes around you seemed weaker now that you had your weak magic back, but still too constricting to do much with.

You closed your eyes as the glow approached your chest. It warmed your face with the heat. They were going slow on purpose. Wanting to savor your reaction. It made your stomach go queasy. You hoped you would pass out. Better yet, just die of the agony. That way Beron wouldn’t have the satisfaction of killing you himself.

There was a thump, and sizzling. You cracked open your eyes, waiting that searing pain to hit you. But it didnt. The males stood back, bewildered. Across the camp in the dull glow of the fire as the one that had been lowering the branding stick to you. It was speared through his chest, pinning him to a tree. His mouth gasped, eyes wide and glowing a haunting orange from the fire. You would never forget the sight of it. The smoldering that came from the tree behind him as the hot iron burned into it. The wet sounds of his mouth opening and closing.

Then, the gasp and thump each male that Azriel incapacitated before you. Elain stood at the edge of the trees, her eyes still puffy from sleep. Azriel kept the kills quiet and concise. None resembled the one pinned to the tree, now sagging under the weight of death. No, the rest of them had easy deaths at the hands of one skilled at dealing killing blows. The wet splatter of blood leaving a body pulled you back to the scene in front of you. Az’s scowl as he cleaned his blade was that of a warrior who had seen much worse. Done much worse.

“I told you not to fucking-” He snarled, his hands on the rope at your wrists. He stopped though, and stared. The shadowed light of his eyes seemed to be blooming with awe. You couldn’t look away. The beauty in the deep irises, the way small freckles played about his dark skin. All new and exciting things you’d never noticed before. His scent alone was like a punch to the gut.

Him. Azriel. It had been him to find you. Him to respond to that silent plea that you so badly needed to be heard. He was that coiling darkness that had saved you. Your breath was a gasp, and you nearly fell to your knees before him.

His hands didn’t work anymore. The world stopped turning all together. His heart was no longer his own and his soul belonged wherever you were. It didn’t matter that you were in the middle of a foreign court’s borders. It didn’t matter that Elain trembled in the corner of the clearing. He was yours, and you were his.

He vowed it, for eternity that was how it would stay. He’d never leave your side again. Never choose to be without you for as long as he may be alive. His very being was now shared. With you. His soul intertwined your yours, wrapping delicately around your earthy light that contrasted his darkness so perfectly. If you were the sun he was the moon, always chasing, always following and living in your light.

The words weren’t needed but he managed to utter them. Around a shuddering breath and a shattering explosion of love he managed it. “My mate.”

#azriel #azriel x reader #acotar #acotar fic #reader x azriel

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