#so that when some hot sexy lady feels insecure about her body i can be like “Your body weight is half my bench press”

[minhosimthings]

you give me alpha boss bitch weight-lifting ssenunni vibes 💅🏼

Idk about the alpha boss bitch but I do weight life hehe

[disturbedbydesign]

Take Me Home - Part 2

PAIRING: Dennis Baker x Reader

SUMMARY: It’s been nearly a year since your ex-boyfriend dumped you and left you with a laundry list of insecurities, and you haven’t been able to really put yourself out there since. But when Dennis shows up at the adoption fair you’re running for your job at the animal shelter, there’s just something about him that makes you feel like you’re ready to try again.

WORD COUNT: 6K

WARNINGS (more to come): Body Issues (Dennis and Reader), References to Past Animal Abuse, Emotionally Abusive Exes (Dennis and Reader), Eventual Smut. 18+ only, no minors.

Series Masterlist

Part Two

You’re still in shock as you leave Dennis and Jax at a table outside and go in and order your coffees, holding the $20 that Dennis insisted you pay with. Your brain is overloading because you don’t know how you ended up here, using Jax as an excuse to basically throw yourself at this poor guy. You know Dennis is just being nice—it’s just coffee, after all, and he probably just wants to get to know Jax a little better and ask you some questions about him before he brings him home. You need to pull yourself together and start acting professional instead of asking a client personal questions about his dating life and telling him he’s hot. What the fuck were you even thinking?

“Who’s the beefcake?” the cafe owner, Cassie, asks from behind the counter. She waggles her eyebrows at you and you shake your head.

You’ve been coming to the cafe at least once a day since you started working at the shelter and Cassie has become one of your good friends. She’s also a major cat lady and has adopted three of your kitties. She might know more about your life than even Mal does, and she clocked Dennis the second you sat him outside.

“Just a client, Cass,” you say.

“Well he’s a hot client,” she replies. “He’s got that whole sexy nerd thing going on.”

“He’s adopting Jax,” you say and you can’t help the dreamy smile that spreads across your face. Cassie notices because of course she does.

‘Oh, so you’re in love in love.”

“I am not,” you snap. “I don’t even know him.”

“Sweetie, with a body like that, what else is there to know? And he’s adopting your baby boy? I know you’re thinking about it. Don’t even try to lie to me.”

“Maybe,” you admit. “But I can’t just, like, ask him out.”

“Why the fuck not?”

“Because… I- I don’t know. He’s obviously not interested.”

“He’s been staring at you with his damn mouth open the entire time you’ve been in here, sweetie. I think he’s more than interested.”

“He probably just wants his coffee,” you reply.

“He’s thirsty for something,” Cassie says, “that’s for sure.”

The man waiting in line behind you clears his throat impatiently and Cassie scowls at him before getting your coffees. You hand her the $20 but she refuses.

“You’re not paying today,” she says. “It’s for good luck.”

You roll your eyes, knowing it’s pointless to argue with her when she’s got her mind set on something, so you pocket the $20 and grab the coffees. When you turn around, you see Dennis focused on Jax, not you. Of course Cassie was exaggerating, you think to yourself as you walk towards the patio. You hand Dennis his coffee and the $20 back.

“On the house today,” you say. “The owner is a friend.”

“You can, uh, just keep it,” Dennis says, and you furrow your brows at him.

“For what?” you ask.

“I- uh, I dunno. Next time?” He scratches the nape of his neck and shakes his head. “I’m sorry, I just… uh…”

You wait for him to say something else but he doesn’t finish. He turns his focus to Jax and it’s like he wants to pretend you’re not there. You need to fill the silence, so you just start talking—telling him every possible thing he could ever want to know about Jax and what you would recommend for when he takes Jax home. He barely looks at you the entire time, just quick glances out of the corner of his eye, and you feel so incredibly stupid that you thought even for a second that he might be interested. You’d even entertained the idea of asking him out on an actual date? Are you crazy? What the hell has gotten into you?

Dennis clears his throat and you think you must have been rambling on too long.

“Sorry,” you say. “Too much information?”

“No, not at all. I just… I was wondering if you’re working on Saturday? Like, if you’ll be there when I take him home?”

“I’m always working,” you reply. “I don’t really have much of a life outside work, honestly. It’s pretty sad.”

Dennis gives you a tiny smile. “Same. I mean, since the divorce…” He trails off and shakes his head and mumbles something under his breath that you don’t quite catch. “Sorry, I’m sure you don’t want to hear my sob story.”

You would actually very much like to hear it and anything else he wants to tell you about himself but you just nod. “You don’t have to tell me anything you’re not comfortable with, Dennis.”

You see his leg bouncing and you want to reach out your hand to still it, to calm him and feel the corded muscle underneath the fabric of his pants. You don’t, of course, because that would be insane and you have to remind yourself that you are not the crazy, clingy, needy person that your ex convinced you you are. He takes a deep breath and he’s about to speak when your phone rings—Mal’s ringtone—and you remember you’ve got dinner plans with her.

“Shit,” you say. “Sorry, I have to take this.”

“Where the fuck are you?” Mal asks, and you can hear the bustling restaurant sounds in the background. “We were supposed to get drinks at 6.”

“I know, I just…” You look up at Dennis and he turns his head quickly to Jax, who is very much enjoying the head scratches Dennis is giving him. “I got caught up at work. I’ll be there soon.”

“I’m starting without you,” she says and hangs up.

“I’m so sorry, Dennis. I totally forgot that I’m supposed to meet my roommate for dinner. I have to go.”

“No,” he says. “It’s my fault for keeping you. We were just supposed to go for a quick walk and I’m taking up too much of your time.”

You smile at him. “Hey, coffee was my idea, remember? I’m the idiot who forgot I had plans.”

He speaks low, down into his lap, and you almost can’t hear him when he says, “I’ll get out of your hair.”

“I’m really sorry about this. I was… this was nice. And I’ll see you on Saturday, yeah? For the big day?”

He gives you a smile but it doesn’t reach his eyes. “Yeah, ok. See you then.” He turns to Jax with enthusiasm and tells him, “You too, buddy. I’m gonna get the house all set up for you.”

Watching the two of them together almost makes you lose it. You feel like you could cry happy tears seeing Jax find his person after all this time, but it’s something else, too. You’re really going to miss him, and it’s only just occurred to you that you won’t get to see him every day anymore.

“What’s wrong?” Dennis asks. “Did I do something?”

You realize you’ve let a tear slip out and you wipe it away.

“I’m fine,” you say. “I’m just… I’m gonna miss him.” You feel your cheeks heating up with embarrassment and you sniffle and shake your head. “I should be used to this by now. I don’t know why I’m crying. I’m such a fucking mess. This is… embarrassing.”

“Well,” Dennis says, shifting uncomfortably in his chair. “You’re, uh, you’re welcome to come see him any time you want to.”

You know he doesn’t mean it, that he’s just saying it to make you feel better. After all, Jax is his now (or will be in a few days). He’s going off to start a happy new life with Dennis and he doesn’t need you anymore. You’d just be an imposition, an interruption, an intruder—someone for Dennis to tolerate for a little while until he can politely kick you out of his house and go on living his life.

“Thanks,” you say. “That’s sweet of you to say.”

“I mean it,” Dennis says, and his tone is dead serious. “Anytime.”

You still don’t believe him, but you appreciate his kindness.

“I gotta get Jax back,” you say. “But you can come by any time after 10 on Saturday.”

“I’ll see you at 10:01 then,” he replies.

You laugh as you take Jax’s leash from Dennis’s hand, and when your fingers brush against his, you feel a spark shoot through you, leaving the hairs on your arm standing up straight. You can’t look at him. You’re so fucking touch-starved that just that one brief moment is enough to have your desperation written all over your face. He sees it, though. You know he does, because when you finally look at him, he’s flushed bright pink up to his ears. You’re so fucking pathetic that you’ve managed to embarrass him. You’ve got to get the fuck out of there.

“I- I, uh, I gotta go. I’ll see you Saturday,” you stammer, and you grab Jax and double-time it back to the shelter to put him away for the night.

By the time you make it to the restaurant to meet Mal, you’re an hour late and she’s three martinis in and flirting with some hipster at the bar next to her.

“I’m so sorry,” you say as you rush over to her.

“Don’t be.” She’s wearing her naughty drunk smile and you know you haven’t seen the last of the guy next to her. “I made a friend. But I’m fucking starving so can we eat?” She turns to her friend and puts her hand on his shoulder. “Call me,” she purrs, and hops down off her stool, waltzing over to the hostess without a backward glance.

Mal makes it look so easy. All she has to do is bat her eyelashes at a guy and he’s a goner. Mr. Hipster probably asked her out before she said two words to him, but you… you can’t even manage to make it through coffee without making a complete ass of yourself. After the hostess guides you to your table, you plop down in the booth opposite Mal and put your head in your hands.

“What’s wrong?” she asks.

“I’m just… I’m so fucking sick of being me. I wish I could be you for a day.”

“What the fuck are you talking about? Why? What happened?”

You sigh and grab her martini glass, taking a big sip before returning it to her. “There’s this guy…”

“Oh my god, fucking finally,” she says. “Show me.”

“I don’t have any pictures. He’s just a client. He’s the one adopting Jax.”

She whips her phone out. “Name?”

“Dennis Baker.”

“Hmm, ok. Lots of Dennis Bakers.” She hands you her phone with the Facebook search results open. “Find him.”

You hadn’t let yourself look for him on socials. You’d thought about it a few times, but every time you almost sought him out, you’d hear Brad’s voice in your head: crazy, clingy, needy, desperate. But now Mal is forcing your hand, and when you see his profile, you click on it and smile. His profile pic is very him—glasses slightly crooked, awkward smile, same fucking polo shirt and khakis he always wears that do nothing to hide the body he’s got underneath it all. You hand her the phone back and she laughs.

“This is the guy you’re spazzing about?”

“What?” you say, slightly offended on Dennis’s behalf. “He’s cute.”

Mal considers him for a moment. “Ok, I kind of see it. He looks like a total dork, but that bod…”

“You have no idea.”

“Ok, so what happened that’s got you all turned around?” she asks, setting her phone down on the table. “I mean, no offense, but this guy doesn’t look like he’s turning women away at the door.”

You sigh. “He came by to see Jax this afternoon and I asked him for coffee-”

“Wait, you asked him?” Mal is beaming as she looks at you over the top of her menu. “I’m so proud of you!”

“Well don’t be, because I was totally awkward, and I’m pretty sure once he gets Jax on Saturday he’s never going to talk to me again.”

Mal rolls her eyes. “You’re doing it again.”

“I’m serious, Mal. It was bad.”

“First of all, I’m sure it wasn’t. Second of all, he wouldn’t have gone with you if he wasn’t into you.”

You shake your head. “He was just being nice. I’m sure he just wanted to know more about Jax before he takes him home, and then my pathetic brain turned it into a date even though it totally wasn’t at all.”

“I really hate that you do this,” Mal says. “You always fucking do this. I don’t know why you can’t just accept the fact that you’re gorgeous and sweet and funny and that any guy would be lucky to have coffee with you. Brad really did a number on you. I swear to God if I ever see that fucker again they’ll be cleaning his teeth off the floor.”

“Well as much as I’d love to see that, it doesn’t change the fact that Dennis isn’t interested.”

“Bullshit he’s not. What did he actually say?”

“Not much,” you reply. “I was rambling on about Jax and he barely got a chance to say anything. I mean, Cassie said he was staring at me but I think she was just saying that to make me feel better.”

Mal scoffs. “Cassie has never in her life said anything just to make someone feel better.”

You laugh because she’s not entirely wrong, but still—if Dennis liked you, he certainly wasn’t showing it. When the waiter comes by, you both place your drink and dinner orders before Mal picks up her phone and resumes scrolling through Dennis’s pictures.

“There’s not much here,” she says. “Kind of a red flag, honestly.”

“He just got divorced a couple months ago,” you reply. “He probably deleted a bunch of shit.”

“He got kids?” she asks, and you shake your head no. “Well then he’s probably lonely as fuck. I bet you a million dollars that if you asked him out to dinner, he’d say yes.”

You shake your head vigorously. “I can’t do that.”

“Why not? What’s the worst that can happen? He says no? Then fuck it and move on.”

“That’s not the worst thing that could happen,” you mumble.

“Then what, then, because I really don’t understand what you’re so afraid of.”

You’re grateful when your cocktail arrives and after taking a big sip, you decide to tell Mal the truth.

“I’m scared of, you know, being with someone again.”

“What, like sex?”

You nod. “I just… I feel like, if he does actually like me and we went out then he’s obviously going to want… you know…”

“To fuck you. Yes. I would think so.”

“I’m just not ready.”

Mal sighs. “It’s been almost a year, sweetie. What the fuck is going on with you? Is there something you’re not telling me?”

There’s so much you haven’t told her and you still can’t bring yourself to go into details but you know you have to give her a little something, if only so any of this makes sense to her.

“I just feel gross. I hate my fucking body. I hate so many things about it and I just… the idea of someone else seeing it makes me sick. I get so anxious even thinking about it. So why the fuck would I go out with him if I’m just going to end up disappointing him?”

Mal reaches across the table and takes your hand and you feel the tears start to well in your eyes.

“There is nothing wrong with your body. I’ve seen you naked, you idiot. You’re fucking hot. Where is this coming from?”

You sniffle and wipe your eyes. “You know where.”

“What the fuck did that asshole say to you?”

“I don’t want to talk about it, Mal. Please don’t make me talk about it.”

She lets go of your hand and takes a sip of her drink. “Fine. I won’t make you. But just know that whatever it was, he’s wrong.”

“Can we talk about something else now?” you ask.

“Of course, but let me just say one last thing. This guy… he might surprise you. I mean, he’s divorced. He might want to take things slow, too. Not every guy wants to fuck on the first date.”

“Just the guys you date,” you reply, and she gives you a wicked smile.

“Yeah, but if I didn’t want to fuck on the first date, most of them would be willing to wait. And something tells me that this Dennis guy would be willing to wait for you. So promise me one thing. I’m not going to pressure you to ask him out, but if he asks you, I want you to say yes.”

You take a deep breath and release it as your food comes. “I will,” you say. “I promise.”

***

Dennis pulls up to his old house Thursday morning before work dreading having to deal with his ex, but he made a promise and he keeps his promises. It feels strange to ring the doorbell to his own home—the home that he paid for and which he should have kept in the divorce if he wasn’t such a fucking pushover. But he didn’t want to fight over money and assets and all of that. By the end, he just wanted to get it over with. He couldn’t stand one more day of her toxicity and constant degradation, his days filled with nothing but her insults and cruelty. In the final weeks of his marriage, he felt more alone than he does now as a single man.

Dennis grips his toolbox tightly as his ex-wife opens the door in her robe, hair all messed up and a smug smile on her face.

“You’re late,” she says.

“Sorry,” he apologizes, even though he’s right on time. “So, uh, what’s the problem?”

“Same shit. It’s not draining right. Just take care of it, will you? I have shit to do.”

Dennis hears a man’s voice call out from upstairs—from the bedroom, his bedroom. “Who’s that, babe?” the man asks.

“No one important,” she calls out to him, smiling at Dennis as she twirls a strand of hair around her finger.

“Yeah, uh, so I’ll just… take a look at it then.”

Dennis heads straight to the kitchen with his head down, not wanting to give his ex the satisfaction of seeing the heat blooming on his cheeks. He knows she did this on purpose, that this is what she wanted. He wouldn’t be shocked to find that there’s not actually anything wrong with the dishwasher (although there is). He’s halfway done fixing it when he hears the thunk thunk thunk of the headboard on the wall upstairs, the stranger in his bed moaning and his ex-wife shouting all sorts of filth as he fucks her.

“You fuck me so good, baby. Yeah, just like that. God I love your fucking cock. Feels so good.”

Dennis tries to drown out her sounds by turning on the tv in the kitchen but he’s heard enough already—enough to bring him right back to that dark place he used to live in. He hears her voice in his ear.

You have a bad penis, Dennis. All that cock and no idea what to do with it. You’ll never be able to fuck me right. You’re the worst I’ve ever had. Don’t kiss me. Don’t touch me. You disgust me.

Dennis leaves the dishwasher job unfinished as he walks out the door and slams it behind him. He knows she’ll laugh when she sees he didn’t finish, probably make some joke to her new man about how she never finished when she was with him. But this was a new level of cruelty, even for her. He’s angry, sure, and he wants to hate her but he doesn’t because Dennis doesn’t hate people even when they deserve it. Instead, he takes all that hatred and turns it on himself. But today, at least, he took a stand. He walked out the door, telling himself that she’s not worthy of his help or his kindness, and she will never get it again. He makes a promise to himself to reserve his kindness for people who deserve it, tells himself he’s done letting people walk all over him. He thinks about Jax coming home in a few days and he decides to dig deep and find some strength. He’ll need it for what is sure to be a tough transition.

Because he’s worried about bringing Jax home. Dennis has been preparing the house for his arrival, buying him the type of treats and toys you said he likes, a brand new Casper dog bed and a nice fuzzy blanket for his spot on the couch. He’s been cleaning like crazy (even though he keeps his place very neat to begin with) and all the while he’s been thinking the worst. What if he doesn’t like it here? What if he doesn’t like me? What if he misses you and wants to go back?

Dennis wouldn’t blame him. He wouldn’t want to leave you either. When he’s not worrying about Jax’s homecoming, he’s thinking about you—how desperate you seemed to get away from him after you’d made the mistake of inviting him for coffee. That call from your roommate was a convenient excuse to leave, but he stops short of believing you a liar. No, you just got a lucky break, because what reason would you have for wanting to stay? You’d given him all the information he needed; that’s what you were there for. And what did Dennis do but talk about his ex and his fucking divorce?

Dennis replays your “date” over and over again in his mind, only in his fantasy conversations with you, he is the man he wants to be instead of the man he is. He asks you questions about yourself. He tells you how smart and sweet and beautiful you are. He tells you that he wants to take you out anywhere you want to go and do anything you want to do. And in his waking dream, you say yes and you tell him how handsome he is, how much you want him, all the things you’d let him do to you. And the man he wants to be can actually do those things instead of just having a sad wank watching other men do them in pornos.

Which is exactly what he spends his Friday night doing. With only a few short hours left until he goes to pick up Jax (and sees you again), his mind is racing with thoughts of everything that could go wrong. He tries to distract himself by having a few beers and watching baseball but he can’t quiet his mind. No, there’s only one thing that’ll put him right to sleep. He grabs his phone and gets in bed in just his boxers, scrolling his favorite Twitter porn account until he finds a girl who looks enough like you if he squints. He pulls his cock out and strokes himself hard and slow as the man in the video eats the girl out until she’s shaking and pulling his hair. It’s only 2 minutes long but that’s more than enough time for Dennis, especially once he closes his eyes and pictures your face and what it might look like contorted with bliss and moaning his name.

He wants to make you feel that way, wants to taste you on his tongue and make you scream for him. He knows he can’t, though. Even if by some miracle you’d let him anywhere near you, he could never make you cum like that. The last time he tried to go down on his ex, she laughed at him, told him he was no good at it, and made him watch as she used her clit suction toy on herself—talking shit the whole time about how easily replaced he was by a piece of plastic with a motor. The idea of trying with you, of disappointing you, makes him want to curl up and die.

But Dennis would give anything just to touch you again—just another brush of your hand like the one that set him on fire and had him half-hard in his pants in public within seconds. And he’s sure you noticed; you were so horribly embarrassed and practically ran away from him, because you’re a nice girl who doesn’t need to associate herself with a touch-starved loser who pops a boner when a woman’s fingers graze his knuckles. As badly as he wants to see you in the morning, he’s dreading it, because he knows it’ll be the last time. Once he has Jax home, there are no more excuses for him to text you or come see you, and he knows he doesn’t have the balls to ask you out. Even if you said yes, you’d realize soon enough it was a mistake. No, tomorrow is the end of his delusions of you and him. He just hopes to God he can make it through without embarrassing himself.

***

You get to work early Saturday morning, wanting to spend as much time with Jax as possible before he leaves. You feed him his breakfast and take him out for his morning walk—a nice, long one today, because it’s the last one—and you start to cry on your way back inside. When he hears you sniffle, Jax looks up at you with his sweet eyes full of concern.

“It’s ok, Jax,” you tell him. “You’re gonna be so happy.”

He nuzzles up against your thigh as you walk him back to his pen and part of you considers leaving now just so you don’t have to watch him walk out. If you’re honest, though, it’s because you’re scared to see Dennis after making such a fool of yourself. Mal is convinced he’s going to ask you on a date today but you know he won't. He hasn’t texted you since your disastrous coffee date—not that he has any real reason to, but you thought that maybe he might have some last-minute Jax-related matters to discuss. But nope. Nothing. Radio silence. As much as it’s going to rip your heart out to see Jax go, you stare at the clock, wishing you could speed up time and just get it all over with. Once Jax is gone, so is Dennis. Then you can stop thinking about him and all the what-ifs and just go back to normal. You can stop wanting things you can’t have.

You’re in your office reviewing a new application when you hear his voice at the front desk. Your heart starts thumping in your chest because you know you have to go out there and slap a smile on your face for him and for Jax and make sure everything goes smoothly but you just want to hide in the bathroom and cry. You take a quick look at yourself in the mirror and see the complete mess you’ve made of yourself—all puffy eyes and smudged mascara. You’re such a wreck that you have to laugh, and even though you try to do a quick touch-up on your makeup, it’s pointless. You look like shit. You feel like shit. You just want to go home and curl up with Badger and a box of wine and watch sad movies until you pass out.

“Hey Dennis!” you say, thinking that the false cheer in your voice and in your smile must be completely obvious. “Today’s the big day!”

He looks as nervous as you feel, standing there with his hands shoved into his pockets and shuffling his feet. “Yeah,” he says. “So, uh, how does this-” He stops talking when he finally gets a look at you, and he furrows his brow. “Are you ok?” he asks, his concern genuine, and you almost start to cry again.

“Oh, totally!” you lie. “Just… uh… you know. High pollen count today. Anyway, why don’t you come into my office and we can fill out the final paperwork and then we’ll get you boys home.”

You can feel his large presence a few steps behind you as you walk to your office, all the way telling yourself keep it together keep it together don’t be crazy keep it together. Dennis sits opposite you in a folding chair that is much too small for his broad frame and you almost laugh. You can’t keep the smile off your face, though.

“What?” he asks, his blue eyes wide behind his glasses.

“It’s just… you’re a little big for that chair. Do you want me to get you another one?”

He looks down at his body, as if he’s only just realizing how massive he is in comparison to the seat, and he shrugs. “I’m ok,” he says, but you can see you’ve made him self-conscious and you’re already wishing you’d kept your damn mouth shut.

“Here are the papers. Nothing too complicated,” you say, handing him a few sheets. “You just fill those out and sign them and I’ll go get your boy!”

You rush out of the room before he can say anything and make a pit stop in the bathroom. You talk to yourself in the mirror. “Get your fucking shit together. What the fuck is wrong with you?” And then you hear a toilet flush and Betsy comes out looking radiant as always. She takes one look at you and she knows.

“Jax leaving?”

“Yeah,” you answer. “I just… I need a minute. Can you make sure he’s all ready to go? Dennis is in my office filling out the final paperwork and I just… I can’t go out there yet.”

“Sure thing,” she says. “And, hey, if it’s any consolation, I’m pretty sure Dennis would let you see as much of Jax and of him as you want to.”

You spin around to face her. “Why do you say that?” you ask.

“I saw the way he looked at you,” she replies. “That dopey lovestruck look. That’s how Jack used to look at me.”

“He still looks at you like that, Bets.”

“Yeah,” she says. “I guess he does. Anyway, just thought you should know. I’ll go take care of Jaxy. You stay here and get that shit of yours together.”

You take a minute or two to just breathe, and when you return to your office you find all 80 pounds of Jax sitting on Dennis’s lap in the tiny chair.

“Oh my God,” you say. “I have to take a picture. Can I take a picture?”

Dennis is all smiles and giggles as Jax licks every inch of his face and neck.

“Yeah,” he says, coming up for air. “Go for it.”

You grab your phone and take a few shots and then a video, telling yourself they will be great for the website but really you want them, too—a memory of a happy Jax on his way to his new happy home.

“Get down, Jax,” you say. “That chair is about to collapse.”

Jax does as he’s commanded and bounds over to you, jumping up to give you a few kisses, too. And that’s when you lose it. You try not to, but it’s pointless. The dam breaks and the tears pour out and you fall to your knees in front of Jax, wrapping your arms around him.

“I’m gonna miss you, buddy,” you say into his fur. “I love you. You’re gonna have such a good life. I just know it.”

You hear Dennis get up out of the chair and come kneel next to you, and when he places his big hand on your back, it just makes you sob harder.

“I’m so sorry,” you say. “This is so unprofessional. I never do this. I usually just cry at home like a normal person.”

“Hey,” he says, his deep voice soft and soothing. “I meant what I said the other day. You can come see us any time you want.”

“No,” you say. “He needs to adjust. It would just confuse him.”

“What… What if… I want you to come see us?”

You look up at him and wipe the tears from your eyes and you can see his Adam’s apple bob as he swallows deep.

“You… you’d want me to?”

“Yeah,” he says. “I would. I really really would. We both would, right Jax?” Jax barks right in your face and you laugh. “See? How can you say no to that?”

“Well, I never could say no to this guy,” you reply, pulling Jax’s ears down and letting go so they pop back up into place.

“So you’ll come over?” he asks, all nerves again like you hadn’t already agreed. “Once we get settled in?”

“I’d love to come visit,” you reply, looking from Jax to Dennis. “The both of you. Now get the hell out of here before I start crying again, will you? Time to take this good boy home.”

Dennis stands up and holds his hand out for you to hoist yourself up off the floor, but you both pull a little too hard and you end up stumbling into him, catching yourself on the hard muscle of his chest. You let your hands linger a beat too long as you stare at him, his hand still holding yours and his other hand cradling your elbow. He licks his plump bottom lip and your whole body feels like its throbbing.

“Sorry,” you whisper, unable to find your voice. “Clumsy me.”

You both let go at the same time. Dennis straightens his polo shirt where you’d bunched it with your fists and you wipe your hands on your jeans because now you’re starting to sweat. You haven’t been that close to a man in months, and you’d never been that close to one so fucking huge with such pretty eyes who smells so good.

“I’ll see you soon,” he says. “Yeah?”

“Yeah,” you reply, still breathless from your little accident.

You lean down and give Jax a kiss on the head and you watch the two of them walk down the hall and out the door, your heart still racing from the absolute insanity of what just happened. You need to call Mal. You need to call her now. You shut the door of your office and dial her up and she picks up on the second ring.

“So,” she says, “what happened? Did he ask you out?”

“Sort of,” you say. “He wants me to come over and visit and I may have accidentally felt him up.”

You have to pull the phone away from your ear because Mal is cackling so loud. “Oh, yeah, ‘accidentally’—right.”

“No, I sort of just… I don’t know… stumbled into the great expanse of his chest and maybe I stayed there longer than I should have.”

“And what did he do when you groped his man titties, hmm?”

“Nothing,” you say. “He just sort of… stood there and, like, held my… I don’t know, Mal. It was an accident. It doesn’t mean-”

“Shut. The. Fuck. Up. It does absolutely mean whatever you think it doesn’t mean. Now hurry up and finish work because we’re going to shopping to get you something cute to wear over to Big Boy’s house.”

“Mal, it’s not a date. And don’t call him that.”

“It’s a fucking date. It counts. And I’ll call him whatever I want. See you later, you minx.”

Mal hangs up before you have a chance to tell her she’s wrong. It’s not a date. He’s just being nice. He saw how upset you were and he wanted to make you feel better. If anything, he’s a friend. Yes, a friend, being friendly. And the other part… well, that was an accident. Best to just forget about it. It didn’t mean anything. You fell, he caught you. That’s what friends do.

PART THREE >>>

Taglist: @littlelioncub43

[iamdarkness]

Taboo

Alfonse x Summoner.NSFW 18+

This one goes to the people who wanted an Alfonse Summer atl. At least we got Freyr.

 Taboo: from Tongan tabu ‘set apart, forbidden’

 Summoner POV

As a person who comes from the “World of Steel” I am be very used to most levels of nakedness in people. I mean, when you do P. E. at school or when you go to the gym or running at the park, or the beach, and watch TV; we are all bombarded by all kinds of nakedness. We are used to looking at other people’s bodies as something normal.

   When I got to Askr I met heroes of all kinds and many of them are just like me in that they find levels of nakedness normal. Take Hawkeye for for example. He is quite a gentleman and in his culture it is quite normal to be half naked.

 Leading the heroes I got used to them and their bodies enough that I view most of them with a more clinical eye, like a doctor would. When they are wounded and I help treat them, I see their bodies just as a doctor would. The same goes when I see them in the beach or the spring. This make them much more comfortable around me. So much so that some of the heroes have tried to play tricks on me and see me crack.

  Like the time the most unlikely pair, consisting of Niles and Henry played a trick on older Ike. They took his clothes when he was in one of the baths, locked his room and hid his clothes in my office (which is attached to Alfonse’s). They told him not to worry “ The Summoner is asleep.” I was definitely not asleep and saw the guy in all of his muscular glory. Did I get flustered? Not really. I mean at first it was like “WTF”, but I was not ogling the guy! He was all freaked out, and I got worried. Besides, I have seen him almost naked before. What is a little more skin? Well it wasn’t little to be fair…it was actually quite a lot…

  I was quietly reading a report on my writing desk, all hunched over, when he came silently in and stood right in front of me. I waited for him to talk. I thought it was Alfonse at first, coming to get my report, so I did not even say anything. I am used to him just coming in and sit to wait for me to finish my work quietly. Then Ike stands just in front of the desk and I look up to see a mop of dark blue hair over his “Ragnell”. I look all the way up to see Ike looking over at the bookcase behind me. He was not yet aware I was awake.

   -Ike? What are you looking for?- I ask calmly looking back to the bookcase behind me to see what he was looking for. I hear a yelp and something heavy falling down. I look around and find him on the floor covering himself with his hands. His eyes were wide opened and he could not talk for a second. He just kept opening and closing his mouth and said “ I can explain.”in a strangled voice. Alfonse chooses that exact moment to come inside and finds me standing up to give Ike my coat so he can cover himself up. What does he see? I am undressing my self in front of Ike and Ike is naked on the floor.

 ...NICE…

   Yes we were able to clear that up. Alfonse even laughed about it and still does sometimes, but that was only the beginning.

   Some time later Dieck comes inside the study Alfonse and I use in the library. Now we all know Dieck always uses the bare minimum on clothes, but this time he is wearing only his pants and boots. As soon as he comes in, he starts taking his pants off (And of course he is not wearing underwear) and looks at Alfonse and say.

   -Oh Your Majesty is here too? Oh don’t worry; I don’t mind.- He now is butt naked and kicking his boots off. I turn to Alfonse with a ‘WTF’ face and I see him tomato red and very angry. He looks at me and…Why…is he angry at me too? What did I do?

   -Dieck… what the hell is going on?- I ask calmly because I feel Alfonse is going to blow a gasket and any loud noise will set it off.

   -I am here for the check up.- He says simply and his smile falters a little, looking sideways at Alfonse. I focus on his face like it is a normal conversation. Doctors and nurses can do this and so can I.

   -What check up?

   -The one you ordered to check our birthmarks and scars, just in case we are killed and there is no other way to identify our bodies.- I turn to Alfonse and I give him a questioning look, but he appears to not have heard anything except the “the one you ordered”. He is looking at us both angrily back and forth.

   -Umm…Well now that you mentioned it… It sounds like a good idea, but I have never given that order. Whoever told you that? -Still focused on the face.

   -One of the soldiers…so it is not true?- He asks now red in the face, which is very weird because this man has no sense of shame when it comes to showing off. Then he goes to cover himself with his hands, but too late Dieck, I already saw it all.

   -Well no, but it is a good idea, right Alfonse?- I say thoughtfully. He seemed to have regained his senses and is now still red, but his face is lowered and he just nods.

   -Oh…I should go then and find that (he whispers some curses under his breath)…I… -He takes his pants and puts them on. I start making a note about the idea to tell Anna.- I am sorry ______.

   - Don’t worry Dieck. No harm done. This has happened before and just so you know I liked the idea, but if we do make it happen, it would be a member of the healing team doing the check up.- He looks skeptically at Alfonse who is pinching the bridge of his nose and has his eyes closed. You know, that face he does when he is about to lose his patience? Well that one.

   -Oh! Thanks for letting me know.

   -I want to know if you can identify the soldier that told you this. Please see me tomorrow after breakfast,at the training ground.- Alfonse tells Dieck and there is a determined look on his face. Dieck looks back at him and with just the same look, agrees to it.

   At the end we did use that idea, but meanwhile I had four other heroes coming in to undress in my presence. One of them being Lady Camilla who agreed to dismember whoever was the culprit of the trick. The other was Libra who looked about to faint when he was informed he had been tricked by someone. King Claude, who laughed about it and congratulated whoever had bested him in his kind of game; and finally Sonia, who paraded around the room, even after I told her it was not necessary for her to undress. The culprit ended up being Xane ,and Marth was not lenient with him. Neither was I. I mean whoever plays a trick like that on Libra?! Yes! He is a guy!

 This keeps happening periodically, specially with new heroes. It is like some kind of hazing ritual.

   At this point I have seen at least one version of all the heroes naked for one reason or another and like I said before, they seemed to be very comfortable around me and my professionalism.

  Yet I, being myself can’t get used to showing much of my own body due to my insecurities. I mean I may exercise and maybe train but I keep myself still kind of covered up almost all the time. It is a uniform after all. I even have to wear that tiara they gave me. I look like royalty XD

  Askr itself has it’s own norms and they are far more conservative when it came to dress codes and overall behavior. I mean Alfonse sometimes sounds like I imagine my great grandpa sounded back in the day. And this is when I realized something. I have never seen Alfonse in any kind of undress and…It kind of bother me. Why? Because he was the only one person I was attracted to in all of Askr. I loved that man’s mind, heart, personality and skill…in everything he did.

 I knew I was in love with Alfonse at this point, but it had taken another Alfonse showing a little chest to understand that I was the the most sexually frustrated of all my life and that looking at his chest was doing things no one else had done in their entire nakedness. Hell not even porn or hentai had given me the high I got from imaging my Alfonse in that outfit. I mean…not that I used to watch porn or hentai. I know what they are, but the time I did watch, it was all meh. I even thought it was funny. I mean, who isn’t curious about that ? I suppose we have all gone at least once and taken a look at it? Right?…right?

   I remember plain as day I stood there stunned into silence, and probably mouth agape the whole time. I must have looked like an idiot or a pervert! My Alfonse was red as a tomato and trying so hard to avoid my gaze. At the end of the day, the only thing I got out of him was a little laugh and a small  “I am so glad, we do not share that costume here in Askr.”

 …..FUCK!

   I find my self starting at his UN-globed hands when he is drinking tea or eating. I try not to, but the white smooth surface of the back of his hands contrast with the rough calloused fingers, so used to gripping sword and shield. They can also play the sweetest of sounds on a violin and I find that so sexy. Those same long white fingers so tempting and beautiful in their strength and skillfulness. Sometimes I stop my self from wondering how they would feel and...<<What them fingers do Alfonse?!! No ! Stop!>>

  It is true I touch him often. Touch is my love language and even though I always make sure to give people that do mind, their personal space, I do know that Alfonse does not mind. Alfonse may not be a huger, but it does not mean he does not enjoy being touched by people he holds close to him or for them to be near him. Also yes, I have helped him with his wounds but, most of the time I am to damn worried to actually take time to enjoy the touch of his skin and to be hones I find that quite a violation of trust, so I do not indulge in it.

   Sometimes he has caught me starting at the brim of his scarf and under-armor for a glimpse of his neck and I feel so embarrassed by it, but the thought of kissing him there is so tempting to me and I long so much to see past that barrier. He always covers himself again when he sees it is revealing more that that fraction of his neck… And Lord above! Is he smiling?

   The curse of all of this is, that yes we have Summer here in Askr, but it is not as hot and you have to travel to the beach to be seriously hot. He has never gone to the beach with us, since I arrived here.  I am not counting the times we do go, because Anna comes up with some scheme to raise money for the order, because we all wear the uniform then. Whenever he goes to the hot spring; he does it by himself, when Sharena and I are doing something else. Even while going to the river he wears long sleeves, because …bugs. I have asked Sharena and she just answered that she had not noticed and why I was interested….Oh you know…scientific purposes Sharena…

  At first I feel so sad and rejected. Fine…I get it. You are not interested in me and do not welcome my intrusive looks…but…he gives me so many mixed signals! Why is he so close at meetings and I can feel his fingers touching mine. He has taken my hands in his many times. When another hero flirts with me he always appears out of nowhere with knitted brows and a disapproving stare. Prince Hrid came to say ‘Hi’ once and to talk to me, and next thing I know Alfonse drops everything to be next to me as well. Hrid even asked me if we were engaged ! I wish Hrid!

 Well I suppose that is what friends do right? Maybe he does not want me falling in love with a hero and leaving Askr while they need me here. But I talked to him already. I am not returning “home” and I am not leaving…because…How can I leave and not see him again? Not that I wanted to return “home” to begin with, and it seemed impossible to fall in love with someone else other than him.

   I have seen heroes flirting with him as well, and he seems unimpressed by any of them. I have heard other heroes telling the rejected ones, “He has eyes only for the Summoner.” …But what had they seen that I don’t? So I go and ask Sharena and she just laughs it up and says to give him time. He is shy and self conscious.

 …So he does like me, but is very shy and very busy and very self conscious and insecure? OK…I can work with that. Like a great elf king said once; “I am patient; I can wait.” But not that much cause I’m not an elf.

   Then Lif came and I thought “Hell! Even his grandpa show more skin than him!”

 Lif came like a shadow from the grave that will take your last breath. To be honest, he looked more like Death than Hel herself. Except… He was HOT. I felt bad for even thinking that, when the Goddess of Death was trying to end us all, and most specially Alfonse. And you see, that is when I got angry. How the heck was an ancestor of the Askr royalty helping that crazy witch, end his descendants?

   Lif attacked us and tried to, I suppose…kidnap me? He made a bee line to where I was standing and fell all the soldiers on his way. It was weird! I was about to bolt, because the training I had, would not stop the guy who just felled like twenty guys on his way, but something, not fear, took hold of me and I just…those eyes… It was like ten seconds in which I looked into his eyes and saw so many emotions in them, that I could not understand and then I could not move….ten seconds and he was already there in front of me, not attacking but there!

   Alfonse came before Lif had taken me or whatever he was going to do. He ended up with a bruised knee and ankle. I went to help him with some salves and bandages when we were done with the rest of the more serious injured people. He took off his shoe and rolled up the under armor. His ankle was not swollen and his knee was bruised but it was not swollen. I put some salve any way.  

  -What happened? I saw it from afar and felt I would not get there fast enough. Where was Dimitri?- He said a little angry, since King Dimitri was one of my supports alongside him and he was tasked today with being my guardian. I was still massaging his ankle not even thinking about it.

  -They were circling us from the back and Dimitri had to fall back to take care of it…Umm…I don’t know what happened. It was weird. He looked at me and he just…

   -I saw it too.- Said Sharena who came to stand behind Alfonse.- It was like he hit you with a spell.

   -It didn’t feel, like a magic attack. I was more like… I don’t know…- I felt weird about it, so I just made some stupid joke to lighten the mood- Why didn’t y’all tell me your grandpa was so hot? Heh , heh, heh heh! What? It’s not my fault! He kind of looks like you Alfonse.- Hey I was nervous and I do this when I get nervous!

   At first They gave me their “ Seriously?” stare, but Sharena catches on quick and starts laughing out loud. Alfonse? Well he scowls and close his eyes and then takes his foot away from my hands. What?? wait I didn’t get the chance to enjoy that! Damn! Next thing I know, he is taking his sock and starts putting in on. I see his smooth white skin peppered with… is that golden hair? Does it have a blue in it? and my throat closes dry. I follow his movements, as hypnotizing as a dance, rolling up that white sock that is taking away my hopes and dreams. Then the under armor goes down and boot on. It took him like ten seconds, that I totally did not count. Then his hands were covered as well.

 I look up at him with my hands still hovering in the same place as when he took away his leg and see him smiling sideways. I compose myself and…Wait…What? Is he doing this on purpose? Seriously? And the worst part is, that it should not bother me at all, but the truth is…I am very bothered by it. He has become a some sort of taboo to me and GOD how I love the guy! If it was someone else like Robin who never looses that coat of his and globes; I would not care! But I love him Lord. Why is he like this? I used to thank God I was not one of those feet fetishes people, and now I will be dreaming of his feet.  Thanks Alfonse!

 Joking. I respect feet fetish people. To each their own.

 The point is that I feel like those people in Victorian novels, where they get all hot and bothered by someone’s ankle showing more than normal! Oh but what an ankle that was tho’. Stop. Focus!

   I resolve to see him as clinically as any other hero and not stare at the shape of his ears and think of how I want to whisper how much I love him while kissing it…Grrr…I’m doing it again.

   Days later we see Lif again and Alfonse is cursed…We have nine days. Good thing Hel has not seen The Ring or it might have been only seven. Yeah I joke now, but back then I was about to commit murder and then kill myself…or something just as dramatic.

 We searched for days, a way to undo the curse and we found nothing. You’d think I would have taken a page from Dean Winchester's book and played the “last days on Earth” trope to get into his pants; but to be honest nothing like that even crossed my mind at the time! I was so desperate to keep him alive that nothing else matter to me. He could have paraded naked in front of me at the time I was at the library and I would not have noticed…Well, maybe I would have, but it didn’t happen so it doesn’t count

   Until the sixth night of the curse.

   There was a knock at the door to my chamber. Oh! Did I mentioned we have a shared study? Because we do. It is between our chambers and it can only be entered from our rooms. It was his idea and it was for safety reasons. The nights I have spent sitting by the chimney staring at his door…but never mind that. He knocked at my chamber door and when I opened it, he was about to leave. He was wearing sleeping pants, a long sleeve night shirt and socks, all in white.

   We had fallen asleep next to each other at the library before of course, especially during the days he was cursed. And yes we used to huddle together during our march through Nifl. It was effing cold OK. We also usually had our sleeping rolls next to each other during campaigns, because we fall asleep while talking or after a watch,but we had never slept together on a bed. Beds are…intimate to him I suppose.

This night however, he came in and he just goes on and sit on my bed. He said nothing. I sat next to him and reached over to give him a hug. He took this as his cue and hugged back and didn’t let go. He clung to me with such force I was starting to feel dizzy. I asked him to stay the night. He nodded and still said nothing. I blew out the candle I was using to read and we went to sleep while he hugged me tightly. It was no surprise to me, but it was not so much fear that I could see in him. It was so many emotions, that fear seemed to be the least of his problems; but of course he was afraid. We spend together the following nights of his curse. Funny thing is …all those nights I dreamed of his Grandpa, watching over from my balcony window.

  And did I had a glimpsed of something while sleeping together? No. He came in and blew the candle out and by the time I woke up he was already awake. Not like I would have gone and taken advantage of his sleeping form to explore or something. I just thought later that if I had woken up before him, then may be I would have seen his shirt riding up or his pants lowered a little or maybe his sock had fallen off or something. Oh well…They were still the best nights of my life, even if they didn’t feel like that at the time. I mean, I got to be held like I was the most precious and sacred treasure in the world by my beloved. I would care for nothing else.

 Then…Grandpa is actually Alfonse from the future…

 Lif, as he goes by now, told us everything that had happened in his Askr. Which is weird because I had been dreaming of something like that and I thought it was stress.

 We spent some days in that dead world and I got to see Lif a few times. He looked curious about me, but at the same time I noticed he was avoiding me. The way he looked at Sharena really broke my heart every time I caught him starting at her. In turn Sharena looked ready to adopt him, if only he would let her do it.

One of those night I was having a nightmare about me dying while I saw Anna drop dead as if by magic. I woke up to find Lif watching me from afar. I got up and went to talk to him before he ran away.

 We talk for a while. I do not want to intrude on painful memories, but he seems to know me so well it feels natural to talk to him, just like it is to Alfonse.

 -You two…you are not lovers yet?- He asks eyeing me sideways.

 -No. Where you…?

 -Yes. After the first attack. We spent some weeks fighting Hel together. Is he still playing hard to get then?-Oh and there it was.

 -Oh! So it is not my imagination! God I thought I was going insane! Oh that Bunny suit messed me up! I love that chest!…wait. Is that why you have your chest out? - He nods.- And the glow…I noticed Thrasir does not have that glow and I love glow in the dark…ermm… It is an awesome design I have to say. I like it. It is sexy.- I felt bad for the lack of tact but at the same time he needed to know I did not find him ugly or scary any more.

 -You were always odd like that Summoner.- He says that in his deep voice, and it conveys a lot of feelings.

 Did he let me touch his chest? No…and I didn’t really ask to be honest. My respects to Lif. He gave up everything for us. I owe him a lot.

 Well, now I knew for sure and I could confront him or let him keep doing it, or maybe just seduce him. It was strange. I always thought it only worked on men, but I guess it does work goes both ways! At least it help me to fall in love with his mind and heart first, not his body.

 Next day we were walking out of Lif’s castle when the floor gave in and Alfonse and I fell through it. Luckily it was not even high, but I am not as tall as Alfonse and with my luck, part of my coat and shirt got caught on a sharp part of a broken stone pillar, and I was left hanging about one feet off the ground by one shoulder. I tried wiggling off the coat but I could not do it.

 -Are you hurt _____?- Alfonse asks worriedly getting up from where he landed on the floor.

 -No! I think I just got scratched! But I can’t unhook my self.

 - Only you _____.- Says Alfonse smiling and getting dust out of his uniform.

 -Thanks Alfonse…Can you help me down?

 He looks around and up for a while and then stares at me for a few minutes. Probably thinking how to approach the problem, but seriously I think he could just reach up and unhook me. He is tall enough for that.

  He comes close to me and circle my waist with his left arm and places his left leg between my legs to find leverage on the pillar behind me. He reaches over my head with his right arm to unhook my coat. Being this close to him is so exiting. My heart begins to race and I start feeling kind of hot. I try not to think about it and avoid my gaze from his face, but I can’t help looking at him.

 There was not much light coming down from the hole above us, but I could see the side of his face and ear…yeah the same ear I wanted to…OK! Not now! He took this time to move his leg up to hold my weight up, and I was left straddling it. He kind of wiggled it to adjust and…Oh boy! It felt good, good.

<< Oh no! Don’t move it anymore…>> I was praying for him not to move that leg, because God in heaven, I was going to come right there and then.

 …And he moved it again but higher and harder…

 -Mmmn- Oh GOD! I did not just moan into his ear. I mean, I am not horny all the time, come on! It is just that, he is so close I can smell him. He smells so deliciously manly, and his leg is touching just the right places!!

 Meanwhile he is frozen in place. It seems like he is thinking about what to do or maybe just not thinking at all. I personally think he will be leaving me hanging there to be hones. I am so embarrassed, I lower my face to hide it, but we are so close, I end up hiding my face in the crook of his neck.

 He gasps and I can feel his arm tightening on my waist and I get even closer to him. I feel him moving his head a little as if to see my face and then…he moves the leg again as if testing it. This time slowly. I tried and fail to stifle another moan but it still comes out. He moves his hips upwards and keeps moving the leg. It creates just the right amount of friction needed. I feel my hips move on their own to meet him.

 -Alfonse…- My legs tighten around his and when I come close to his manhood I can feel his arousal as well.

 -_________- He whispers my name softly as my leg touches him. All this while he is still moving that blessed leg back and ford. I am panting at this point and he feels like he is in the same situation. All of this brought me to my knees. I came hard. I sat there shuddering in his arms and biting my hand because the stone caused every little noise to sound louder. I felt him kissing my hair.

 We heard some loud footsteps up above us and then…

 -Hey! You need help down there!- I hear Barst’s voice over my head. He does not sound or look like he heard anything.

 -We are fine…I just need …to get her down.- Alfonse’s voice sound a little strained but Barst takes it to mean he es working on helping me down. Just like that, he unhooks my coat and lowers me down gently, still not letting go.

 -I’m getting a ladder!- He’s gone and we can hear his footsteps getting farther away.

 Alfonse steps forward still with me in his arms ,until my back is against the pillar and then looks at me and kisses me hard.

  I am dizzy by the time he lets go. - He is coming back.- He says against my neck and bites into it. I am sure they could hear that whimper that left my mouth. And can you blame me? He just bit into my neck and at the same time moved his hips in a way that I could feel his manhood rub against me. Both his hands were lowered to my hips and he used them to have me closer to him. All this while, he gave this utterly sexy guttural sound that almost sounded like a growl… He lets go, takes a step back and turns around, a moment later a ladder is lowered.

 -You go. I will explore down here a moment.- He says in a firm voice not looking at me.

  I go up the ladder still a little shaky and flushed. I tel Barst to let him explore to see what he can find, but to leave the ladder for him to get up. Darn I wanted to go “exploring” with him. Just imagining what he is doing down there is doing things to me. Good thing everyone thought I was scared of what had happened. I only had a scratch to show.

 He came back much later.

 …Well that was a lot of “exploring”.

 He comes to the camp outside the castle and we are ready to leave just after lunch. At first he seems reluctant to be near me. I am freaking out because well, overthinking and anxiety mixed with insecurities is a bad mix. Finally after half a day of travel, we make camp and post the watch. He comes and sit by my side when I am eating. We don’t talk about it until we are left alone to go to rest.

 -I…I apologize Alfonse. It wasn’t my intention. I…it just happened.- I tell him when he doesn’t speak.

 - It wasn’t my intention either…you don’t have to apologize. I have been wanting to tell you. I…have feelings for you. I just did not want to say it in a situation like that and not at a time like this. I wanted it to be special. I am in love with you _____.

 -I love you too Alfonse. I have for a long time… I’m sorry I ruined it…but I could not help but enjoy having you so near.- He is scarlet red, but smiling.- Which by the way, is your fault.- He looks puzzled.- Sir you are playing dirty.

 -How so? - He asks.

 -You are playing hard to get with my heart.

 -Oh that game you started playing with mine?-He asks arching an eyebrow.

 -What? Me? When? You don’t even let me see your hands for God’s sake. I never saw you flirting with me.

 -I…hold your hands.- He says blushing. Well that was so Alfonse of him.-…erm…You used to never take off that coat or those pants. You were all mysterious and unreachable- Mysterious? Well, firs time someone said that about me.

 -You wanted me to take off my pants?- He turns red again -I was…insecure. I mean look at those gorgeous women out there and I get all jealous and insecure. I felt safe with my coat on. What was your excuse?

 -The same…I am jealous and insecure…Well, I was at first, but then I noticed something about you. - I give him a questioning look.- You could look at any hero in the nude and not get flustered by it. When I asked you why; you told me they where just natural human bodies to you. You sounded like they were nothing special; like you had analyzed bodies so much you did not find them beautiful or sacred any more. You said you studied them at school and everyone paraded half naked in musical shows and the like. Later you told me you did find them beautiful in an artistic or scientific kind of way but it did not make it better to me.

 How to make someone like you fall in love….with me? I listened to you and how you praised my intellect and skills, and I knew you were attracted to those qualities, but there are other men with intellect and skills at home too. I needed to find a way to be special to you.

  It was only when we met that other Alfonse dressed in a bunny costume that I understood. The way you looked at him made me so envious and jealous. What was so special about him? I saw you ogle his body like he was the most sinful of apparitions, and he looked just like me! I was frustrated. That same evening I saw you looking differently at me, and I could not help but feel elated about it.

 I spied you looking intently at my naked hands and when I put on my globes, that look of disappointment did not escape my eyes. It occurred to me that you had never seen me in any state of undress and it must have been strange to you. I understood how you felt now. I have been watching heroes for years. Beautiful women I have been watching on a daily basis and none of them feel spacial, even if they have beautiful bodies,or incredible skills. Yet the day I saw you wearing regular clothes I …well I…- He blushed, lowered his face and left the sentence hanging.

 I flirted with the idea of letting you see more of me, but then I would just become like any other hero, and I wanted more than that. I want so much more.- Now he looked at me, and there was so much love and affection in his eyes, I could have melted in the spot.

 I have to confess I enjoyed seeing you flustered when you could see a little of me. That made me feel special, but I did not want to be just a mystery to you either. I wanted your heart and soul,your love not only your lust. I needed to to know you loved me.

  I had a talk last night with Lif. He told me they were lovers …His summoner and him. He told me I was being a fool just wasting time. He said that if you were anything like his ______, then you loved me, jut like his summoner did him. _______, I want what they had…I want everything, but I am afraid. Between this situation and the war with Embla…You understand me, don’t you?

 - I understand you. I suppose the time is not right. I don’t want to look back on the day we finally are together and remember all these tragedies. You know Alfonse. You were right about me and my take on “nakedness”. I guess we are on the same page now about desire too. To us, Desire comes from love. That is what makes you and your body especial to me. I fell in love with your sharp mind and your heart first, but also thanks to your “efforts” I can understand and appreciate how special a lover’s body is. You made me understand, that what I feel for you is true love, not just infatuation or lust. Thank you. We can wait if that is your wish…if not…I will not say ‘no’ to that to be honest. I leave it to your discretion…But Alfonse, next time you go “exploring” , I want you to know, I can always lend you a hand. ;)

                                     ~*~

  I write this on the day of Devotion. Alfonse and I had another talk and at the end, we decided to wait. Alfonse’s position is a little difficult, and now even more so after his father’s death. His personality makes me forget he is royalty, but the weight of his crown is a lot. He has more responsibilities and images to uphold. I want to think we have time to enjoy each other’s company, hearts and mind before we rush things any way.

 Well, I have to go, my family (Yes they are my family now) is waiting for me. Sharena informed me there is a huge surprise for me. Well, Anna did owed me some favors and she designed the costumes for the Royal family.I can’t wait see Alfonse! I hear he is wearing sandals XD Wink, wink!

 PS: Wait! I just realized something! Lif was actually spying on us!?

[juminsmysticmc]

So it happened again... Again some people mistook me for a pregnant woman... And having to say "I'm not pregnant, I'm fat" After they insisted took a toll in me as I'm really insecure on my body...

So I was wondering if you could do the RFA + trio reacting to people thinking or saying that MC is pregnant? It could be right or wrong, MC could be insecure or not, I'll leave it to your criteria

Anyways thank you!!! I really love your writing n.n

RFA + Minor Trio reacting to people thinking or saying that MC is pregnant

Hello Baby! Trust me, it happened to me too ahaha, I don’t understand why people are like that like - don’t ask a lady, just don’t do it! I will mix it ( pregnant and non pregnant ) I hope you like it!

Jumin

After the birth of your wonderful son, you and Jumin were more than happy. Your life was filled with love and perhaps too many sleepless nights.

Slowly you were feeling the pains of a mother as you felt angry and stressed.

Your self esteem was going down and that’s when Jumin decided that it was time for you to take a break and he was with you.

,,Are you sure that we can leave our six month old daughter with a nanny?’’ you asked him nervously.

,,Mc, we will be gone for two days and one night. This is the best nanny and I made sure that three guards will be around her day and night. I promise you nothing will happen. We will just have a good sleep and go to the hot springs,’’ Jumin assured you, slowly making you agree to his idea.

And so the two of you went shopping and afterwards to the hot springs where Jumin wanted to make sure that you were able to take a good rest.

However, instead he saw you crying - something he hated.

,,I… I can’t believe that the staff at the info desk thought I was pregnant!’’ you sobbed, looking at him in disbelief.

,,Do I look fat?’’ you asked him with trembling lips.

Jumin quickly hugged you, pressing your head against his strong chest. ,,Never forget that your body is beautiful. I don’t think that you are fat. I never thought that. This person was just rude, Mc… please don’t cry. I love you so much…’’ he whispered.

Of course your husband didn’t allow this to pass. The staff was fired and the both of you enjoyed the last hours of the day in your room, watching some movies and eating chocolate.

Zen

You looked at yourself in the mirror as you turned around several times.

The red dress was so sexy. It looked very beautiful on you and you loved it. Just seeing it made you fall in love with it again - if it wasn’t for a little detail - your belly.

Lately you had a pretty bloated belly, which made you uncomfortable.

But the dress made it look even rounder.

You thought about changing when Zen entered the room and began to touch your body with his soft hands.

,,I love you in this dress. I would love to undress you just to see you even better… your body makes me so crazy…’’ he whispered.

Like always, Zen’s words helped your insecurity. Without knowing, your boyfriend made you feel proud so you decided to let the dress be the one which would make all eyes fall on you. Well, at least you tried to leave it on since Zen couldn’t stop undressing you again.

But you didn’t know that once at the party, a guest would be able to make you cry.

You almost greeted everyone together with the RFA when suddenly a guest approached you. It was an older woman who was invited because she took good care of children without parents.

,,You are the reason why I have a job! How can a pregnant woman drink? The baby in your belly will get sick!’’ she hissed, making your heart stop.

,,Pregnant?’’ Zen and the RFA asked…

After the misunderstanding was cleared up, the lady apologized several times. However, no apology could stop your tears.

You felt just so uncomfortable that even as the host of the party, you decided to go home. Zen supported you with his all, cuddling with you for the whole evening once the both of you were at home.

Yoosung

,,It’s my turn this time,’’ you told Yoosung as you took the car keys and walked to the car.

The both of you were invited to a party of old friends and gladly accepted the invitation.

You and Yoosung both had a deal - the one who would drive wasn’t allowed to drink alcohol while the other was allowed, but of course had to try not to get drunk.

You and Yoosung both were totally fine with the deal. You both switched who would drive regularly and it helped your marriage to improve somehow.

Today you were the one who wouldn’t drink, but of course Yoosung wouldn’t even drink that much - but it was just in case.

,,You look stunning,’’ Yoosung said after the both of you sat in the car, making you smile at him.

,,You are so cute, thank you, handsome hubby!’’ you said and made a grimace, noticing how cringey you were.

Once you arrived at the party, the both of you quickly adjusted to the party, greeting friends you hadn't seen in a long time and laughed a lot.

The waiter passed by for the third time when you took a glass of orange juice and passed Yoosung the glass with champagne.

,,Mc, say, I noticed that you aren’t drinking…’’ a friend said.

,,Yes, Yoosung and I-’’ you couldn’t even finish explaining when she happily announced loudly that you were expecting, making Yoosung choke on his drink. 

,,No… no, stop!’’ you whimpered when everyone began to clap, making your cheeks turn red.

,,Really?!’’ Yoosung asked you and you weren’t really sure how to get out of this mess…

It took the three of you an hour to clear up the misunderstanding.

,,Hee Won, already in the past you liked to make fake rumors because you never let people talk. See what you did?’’ another friend hissed, patting your shoulder to motivate you.

Jaehee

,,I didn’t do my workout once again,’’ you sighed as you put on your working uniform.

,,Your body is just perfect as it is and if you skip once, it won’t kill you, really!’’ Jaehee tried to motivate you as she too began to change her clothes to open the shop.

You smiled at her, happy that she was so positive and was able to make you smile.

,,Thank you,’’ you chuckled and blew a kiss towards her which made her blush.

The both of you took about an hour to finally get ready, but unfortunately you almost tripped, falling towards her, which led you to kiss her and tease her. This almost made you late.

Of course the guests who were always the first to get their coffee on their way to work, noticed that the both of you took longer, but of course weren’t bugged by it as you were on time.

However, the first guest did wonder what happened.

And when Jaehee said that the morning was a bit more hectic than usual, his eyes immediately went to you.

,,Ah, I see, when are you due?’’ he asked you, his eyes on your lower belly.

You blinked about two to three times before you finally understood his question. 

,,I… I am not... I’m not pregnant!’’ you said, loudly, shocked to even get asked.

The man looked up to you, in his eyes showing pure panic.

,,I- Oh dear, I’m so sorry,’’ he gasped and quickly took his coffee after paying.

,,I’m so...oh my God!’’ you laughed, turning to Jaehee in disbelief, who was holding back her laughter.

,,I don’t know if he understood why it was hectic and was embarrassed because of that or because he made a mistake,’’ Jaehee laughed and began to prepare the cakes for the other guests.

Saeyoung

,,I‘m pregnant,“ two words Saeyoung never knew he would hear out of the mouth of his lover. Well, with the amount of sex you two had it was no wonder. However, he still couldn’t believe that one day he would be able to have a family of his own.

Of course at first he had to manage his fears: fears of losing you, not being ready, putting his family in danger… but you took his fears and instead made him almost crazy with your mood.

You were either angry, sad, happy, or sleeping, but for the well being of his baby, he could accept everything.

Even though you didn’t want other people to tell you to be pregnant, Korea was a country, in your eyes, which treated pregnant women as if they were sick and you didn’t want to be treated like that.

You didn’t want to cut lines, you didn’t want to sit on the pink chairs for pregnant women, you didn’t want people to touch your belly with their dirty hands.

And he accepted it.

The two of you were standing in the line to pay your goods, Saeyoung‘s hand around your waist, when suddenly someone turned around- your neighbor.

,,MRS CHOI! PLEASE PAY FIRST! YOU‘RE PREGNANT! WHY SO HUMBLE?“ she asked you.

And she didn’t yell to tease you, her voice was simply so loud to make everyone turn around.

,,Open the jacket! No one will see! How rude of me, please get in front of me!“ she said.

And just like she made you cut in line, the other guests did so too until you passed everyone and were first.

,,I never finished so quickly,“ Saeyoung whispered but you too were dumbfounded.

,,I thought I would hate it but…“ you opened your jacket, your big belly was now easier to see. ,,Guess this also has good sides.“

Saeran

The day was shitty, your week was shitty, and you just felt bad and just like you felt you made people around you feel that you were having a rough time.

The cashier at the supermarket wasn’t greeted by you. You ignored your neighbor and you cussed loudly in your car when someone wouldn’t drive the way you wanted it.

Even though it was hard, Saeran accepted it because you too had your bad times and at such times, especially now, he wanted to support you the best.

And since you still knew that he was trying his best, you tried to not be mean to him, noticing that he still did his best.

However, people around you didn’t see it the same as Saeran and one day someone hissed at you, ,,Are you pregnant?! I mean, you do look like it and you behave like one!’’

These words were implanted into you and you grew embarrassed of your body and kind of angry at yourself that you couldn’t control your feelings well.

But you weren’t the only one who felt bad, Saeran, who was just next to you, felt angrier and angrier.

,,I don’t understand what you wanted to achieve with your comment! You just made her feel worse!’’ he hissed and took your hand, pulling you away with him. 

,,I’m sorry,’’ you whispered, but your apology wasn’t needed. Saeran knew the best that these feelings you were showing were totally normal and accepted them warm heartedly.

Jihyun

No one, just Jihyun, knew that you were pregnant.

One of the reasons was that you learned from your mother that a woman shouldn’t openly announce her pregnancy before she hit her third trimester.

The second reason was that you and Jihyun wanted to enjoy this news alone for the time being.

Besides, you were trying to figure out how to tell Lucy and how to make her react the best with the new baby on the way.

You and your little family, as well as the RFA, were walking together as a group.

Lucy, who was pretty clingy towards Jumin, walked hand in hand with her godfather while you and Jihyun observed the black haired man and the brown haired girl.

Saeyoung and Yoosung were first, talking way too loud while Saeran followed right behind you.

Jaehee just turned her head to you and was about to say something to you when suddenly a random lady approached you from the other side of the street, leaving you surprised for a short moment.

,,Mrs Kim! Nice to see you here! How are you and your baby? Having a little family reunion?’’ a sudden voice asked you and suddenly you recognized the lady as your doctor.

You were so surprised and perplexed that Jihyun had to answer for you.

But as soon as she was gone, all your friends around you waited for an explanation. Of course they still congratulated you and were more than happy.

,,Maybe this time I will become the godfather…’’ Zen mumbled as he rubbed your shoulders.

Vanderwood

Hand in hand, you and Vanderwood entered the big red decorated hall where the RFA party was supposed to have its peak.

You were able to invite a lot of people, making it possible to reach something the RFA thought was impossible.

,,Let’s have a good evening and do our best!’’ you said happily and loudly before you opened the doors for the real guests while you and your group stood together, ready to drink a sip from the champagne Jumin bought.

Just when the cold glass touched your lips, someone held your hand, which stopped you from drinking the alcohol.

,,Why are you touching my girlfriend?’’ Vanderwood asked, annoyed as he looked at the red haired man who just held his fingers around yours.

Saeyoung looked straight into Vanderwood’s eyes.

His big golden eyes looked at him in shock as he realized that he perhaps saved the life of your unborn.

,,Don’t drink alcohol, Mc. You’re pregnant but the hospital still didn’t call you! It could hurt you! And I’m touching your woman to save your child!’’ Saeyoung said, making everyone look in pure shock.

,,Me…? Pregnant?’’ you asked him and while you asked him, Vanderwood quickly took the glass out of your hand, which allowed you to touch your still flat belly.

,,That’s why I felt so sick!’’ you whispered and teared up, making Vanderwood smile happily.

,,I understand that you have to do some background checks on us, but isn’t it illegal to check our medical records whenever we meet?“ Yoosung asked his red haired friend after he hugged you and cried with you out of happiness.

,,I have to make sure that whatever happens, I‘m updated on your health. I just want the best for you and like you saw, Hero 707 just saved an unborn child… they should name him after me!“

ᗰᗩᔕTEᖇᒪIᔕT

16.10.2021// 23:05 MEST

[whoiwanttoday]

A while back I got a message on my phone that just red, “Why is the blue lady so hot”. Now, I’ve been on the internet a long time so that sort of statement could be asking about Mystique or Smurfette or even someone from Avatar though very likely not, the internets porn obsession with that was very short lived. I happened to know it was about Riae though because I had recently posted her but also because the message was from my dear, sweet @thunderstormofoblivion who very much has a type so I was not surprised she saw Riae and could only get out, “Why is the blue lady so hot”. I tried to answer it even though I am relatively certain, and by relatively I mean absolutely, she was not looking for an answer or for me to explain to her why she was attracted to someone. And there are lots of reasons that sort of stem from the hair, which is great, the tattoos, which are great, the body, which is great, but mostly I think it’s confidence and experience. Riae is a lot older than a lot of the people putting pictures of themselves up on the internet. She’s been doing this for 15 years and to be honest, she looks way better now than she did in 2008. That’s not a slam against 2008 Riae but this is just an example of how someone can sort of grow into themselves, develop a distinct style, and really just become more themselves. And so as long as refining her look and aesthetic she has just gotten better at her job because most people do and being a model is like anything else, it’s work and it takes a mix of skill and talent. Talent is often a have it or you don’t situation but skill is something you can work on and if I am honest, most things in life are more skill than talent. Some people are talented enough that they can just get by but they are very rare creatures and skill can really, really fill the gaps. There is one more thing about getting older though is confidence grows. It isn’t that you don’t still have your insecurities, or you know, aren’t just a heaping pile of insecurities in general, but as you grow into yourself you tend to have a pretty good sense of what you are good at and what you aren’t and your confidence really grows in the things that both you know you can do and the things you also know don’t matter (it’s shocking but it turns out that burning embarrassment I felt in 7th grade when I realized this girl I liked did not like me but just saw me as a friend and I felt so stupid for imagining it was more, that doesn’t matter at all. No one cares. I don’t even care). And confidence is sexy and I feel like her work drips with confidence now. She is sexy and talented and skilled. And I think that’s why the blue lady is so hot. I could be wrong though, it could just be boobs and hips because well, @thunderstormofoblivion has a type. Today I want to fuck Riae.

[jamilelucato]

The Duff  || Fred Weasley

pairing: Fred Weasley x reader (any house)

summary: your life became too stressing lately, and Fred Weasley, although generally very annoying, manages to distract you just enough when he stops talking.

A/N: completely based on the book The Duff. Like completely. So reader may have some issues with her appearance. Sorry about my other fics! It’s just that, when an idea pops, I have to write. It’s a big fic. (feel like it’s one of my brightest works)

words: + 11k

warnings: insinuations and mentions of sex; body insecurities; sick father, etc

Harry Potter Masterlist ||  Musical Hogwarts Series

You couldn't understand what could be the fun in going to Three Broomsticks to party. The place is one of the oldest bars in Hogwarts, but not long ago, Madam Rosmerta decided to add a dance floor in one of the darkest sides of the pub, and she got one of those muggle music machines. It was very nice if your thing was dancing in sweat and rubbing your body in people.

Easy to say it was most definitely not your thing.

"Okay, that's it for you," said Madam Rosmerta, taking your mug away. It once was filled with butterbeer, but the barmaid seemed to think you had gotten it filled way too many times for a night.

"Oh, come on," you complained, "there's no alcohol on those."

"I know. But it has sugar, and you had one too many," Rosmerta said, ignoring your pout and walking away from your side of the counter so she could serve other costumers.

Your brain fought a battle to decide if it was worth contesting and explaining that not offering you more butterbeer was causing the barmaid to lose money when the stool next to you cried with the weight that was jumping on it.

"Good evening, y/n," said the boy who now sat next to you.

It was inevitable when your eyes rolled just by smelling his cologne. There was no need for you even to turn to know who it was. Only one boy in the whole Hogwarts was confident enough to wear such cheap cologne as if it was holy water.

"Get the hell away, Weasley," you cried, wishing, profoundly, to have another butterbeer with you.

Madam Rosmerta noticed the new client sitting close to the counter, and she quickly came back to serve him.

"Fred Weasley," she greeted him with her playful smile. She knew the Hogwarts teenage boys only flirted with her in hopes of a discount, but she enjoyed it, considering it rather fun. "What can I get you?"

"My usual butterbeer, Ro," he said, charming her with his smirk. She chuckled, while he passed her a coin.

"If you're getting him one, you're getting me one too," you warned the barmaid, raising a brow. Your serious approach worked because, with a sigh, she walked back with two drinks.

You tossed her your coin.

"That is officially your last one, young lady, so you better enjoy it," she threatened before leaving and playing with her hair solemnly for Fred to see.

He was still smiling when you decided to look at him. He was a bastard, but, boy, was he handsome.

"You have five seconds to disappear from in front of me now that you have your drink," you warned. Even though Fred's eyes followed the back of Rosmerta, yours was still staring at him. Maybe the amount of disgust you felt for him could pass on with a look.

"Chill, would you?" Fred took a sip from his mug, supporting his arms on the counter, finally looking at you. "If you're so bothered, the dance floor awaits."

You chuckled, frowning right after. "Look, Weasley, don't you have any other girl to fuss around?"

He smirked, thinking you were falling for his game. "Do you have friends you'd like to suggest?" he played, raising his brows. "Is Jess still single?"

"I'd be dead if I let you stay even one meter close to my friends, do you hear me? I don't want them catching any diseases," you shivered just with the thought of how many girls (and STDs) this boy before you might have encountered.

"So they are here," his eyes narrowed as if he was scanning the dance floor, searching for your girls.

"Go away, Fred," you sighed, tired of that conversation. You took one sip of your mug, but the butterbeer was no longer enough to keep your mind away from Fred Weasley's affairs. "And stay away from Jess and Casey."

"Oh, y/n, just put a good word for me, please. I mean, it is your job," Fred leaned in, closer to you and his scent attacked your nostrils again, making you lean back.

"It's not my job to help you, Weasley."

"Well, as their duff, I think it is," he drank from his mug, ignoring your confused look.

"Duff?"

Asking him what the word meant called his attention back to you, but he seemed surprised you hadn't heard about it yet. "You know, designated ugly fat friend," he replied, making a peculiar gesture with his neck as he spoke the last term.

You couldn't possibly have heard him right. "Excuse me??"

"Look, I don't mean to offend," he shrugged his broad shoulders, a gift from all his years playing Quidditch.

He noticed how fast your expression was changing.

"It's not like you're an ogre or anything, but in comparison…" his eyes wandered back to the dance floor, this time yours followed, seeing Jess and Casey — your longest-time best friends — dancing with some other students. "Think about it. Why do they bring you here if you don't dance?"

"Shut it, Weasley. They bring me here because I'm their friend; stop with your nonsense," your mind was working incredibly hard to stop you from believing that you were the ugly friend. Because that could not be the truth. Especially if everyone already knew and the one to tell you about it had to be the most annoying Gryffindor.

Fred had the nerve to reach over and pat your knee, but you jerked away from him. "Look," he said, "you have hot friends… really hot friends."

All the butterbeer you had drunk was starting to make you sick. Perhaps Rosmerta had been right, but if you had to bet in a guilt part, you'd bet on the ginger.

"The point is, in a group of friends, there's always a weak link, a Duff. And girls respond well to guys who associate with their Duffs."

"Where are you getting this info? The Quibbler?" you never meant to offend the Lovegoods, but Fred Weasley was speaking rubbish at this point.

"Don't be bitter," Fred pressed his lips together, pausing. "What I'm saying is girls find it sexy when lads show some sensitivity and socialize with the Duff. So, please, help me here, and just pretend to enjoy our talk."

There it was, in front of you, the living, redheaded proof that stupidity is capable of making people persevere for years. You already knew that Fred was a womanizing asshole, but it was unexpected to find out how worthless as a human being he is, too. Pretty faces definitely aren't everything.

With one swift motion, you jumped to your feet and flung the contents of your mug in Fred's direction.

The remaining butterbeer flew all over him, splattering his striped polo collar shirt. The liquid got his ginger hair wet entirely, which surprised you because, usually, you wouldn't have such great aim.

His face burned with anger, and his chiselled mandible clenched angrily. "What was that for?" he snapped, wiping his face with the back of his hand.

"What do you think it was for?" you snapped.

"I have no possible idea."

Madam Rosmerta appeared again, giving Fred a white cloth to dry himself, but it wasn't enough. Part of you wanted to be mad at the waitress for helping Fred, but you knew she just didn't want him to ask her to take you out.

"If you think I'm letting one of my friends leave this place with you, Weasley, you're very, very wrong, " you spluttered, staring at him with fire in your eyes. "You're a shallow jackass, and I hope that we never cross paths again."

The stupid muggle music played so loud that no one but Rosmerta overheard you, and she probably found you awsome. She loved some teenage drama.

You grabbed your friends as quickly as you could. They were about protest all the way to the secret passageway back to Hogwarts, so you decided it was best to explain what was happening.

"What's wrong?" Casey asked. Her once perfect dark hair was now wet — part of you wondered if the sweat even belonged to her. For such a smart Ravenclaw, you expected more of her.

"Let's get back to school; I just can't stand to be in this hellhole for one more second, " you said, dragging their reluctant bodies along behind you.

"Why are we leaving so early? It's only, like, nine-fifteen," Jess asked, frowning a bit, looking at you with her sad big blue eyes. Her Hufflepuff charm was about to work on you when you remembered why you were living.

"I got into an argument with someone, " you said, and Jess puppy eyes quickly disappeared, opening the place for her angry face to emerge. "I threw my Coke on him, and I didn't want to stick around for his response."

"Who?" Casey asked. You'd been dreading that question because you knew the reaction you'd get.

"Fred Weasley." two girly sighs followed your answer. "The guy is a man-whore. I can't stand him. He sleeps with everything that moves, and his brain is located in his pants—which means it's microscopic."

"I doubt that, " Casey said with another sigh.

"He's a jerk," you said, hoping your voice sounded like it was final. The tunnel back to Hogwarts seemed endless.

"That's not true," Jessica inserted. "Katie Bell told me he talked to her when she was alone at the Yule Ball. She was with Angelina and Alicia, and she said he just came up and made conversation, really friendly."

That made sense. Katie was definitely the Duff if she was out with Angelina and Alicia. And you knew for a fact that Angelina left with Fred that night.

"He's charming, " Casey said. "Give him some credit." Her smile slowly faded when she remembered that you threw at him your beer. "But what the hell did he do to you tonight, huh?" Now she sounded concerned. Took her long enough.

You sighed, noticing that saying something would only make their worry and you really wanted to avoid their pity. "Nothing, " you lied, "Fred just pisses me off."

Duff. The word bounced around in your mind as you three reached Hogwarts. When you took a last look at your friends before each parted to your houses, Fred's statement that you were the unattractive, undesirable tagalong seemed to be confirmed.

Jessica's perfect hourglass body and big brown eyes. Casey's athlete's features and impeccable skin. You definitely weren't like them.

"Well, see you tomorrow for the feast?" Jess asked the two of you.

You and Casey shared tired smiles. Although Casey would've like to stay a little longer at the Three Broomsticks, she welcomed extra sleeping hours. Her Quidditch player schedule didn't leave her much time to rest.

"See you," you stated, walking away slowly, letting your feet lead the way to your dorm where you'd try extra hard to forget the whole Duff thing.

 -

You picked your blanket up to your chin, not wanting to get out of bed so soon, even though you could very much get late for Snape's class.

Fred Weasley words were hunting you like a ghost. They shouldn't be, because you sure didn't care about his opinion. But the courage he had called you that disgusting abbreviation and how you seemed to find the one out from every single group of friends you walked past.

It had been a week and a half, so why did his words bother you? You were brilliant and a good witch, always there for your friends. Thus, who cared if you were the Duff?

If you were charming, you'd have to deal with lads like Weasley hitting on you. Ugh! That could be a Duff benefit, right? Being unattractive didn't have to suck.

Damn Fred Weasley! You couldn't believe he managed to pack your head with such superficial bullshit. Getting out of bed with a jump, you were committed.

You wouldn't think about Duffs ever again.

-

Thursdays were homework day, at least for you and your best friends.

When classes were over, the three of you would meet at the library for a long late afternoon, reading through books and doing assignments. And, of course, spilling some tea with whispers.

That afternoon was being way bored than you expected. It was like Jess and Casey interrupted your reading all the time to tell you something new, but that day they seemed to have nothing to say.

And when I say nothing, I mean nothing.

Suspicious.

You stared at them, who pretended they hadn't been facing you all along and turned back to their essays.

"Okay, what is it? You two are awfully quiet," you whispered, leaning closer to them, scared the librarian could hear you.

They exchanged looks before, sighing, Jess gave up on her silent treatment.

"Remember when we planned on going to Three Broomsticks tomorrow?" she pouted, trying to work her big eyes on you.

"You two planned, you mean. I never agreed on it."

"We kinda find dates to go with us," said Casey, ignoring your comment on the matter.

You stared at your two best friends, holding yourself to not laugh.

"Thankfully. I never said I wanted to go," you pointed out with a smile, turning back to your book.

Jessica didn't seem satisfied with you looking away just yet.

"We can find you a date," Jess suggested.

You chuckled. "Alright," you spat — the possibility sounded ridiculous; principally when Fred's words still echoed in the corner of your mind.

"y/n, you have to come," Casey's tone was more serious. "You never go out unless we force you. So, if you don't want a date for yourself, you are thrid-wheeling."

"Not in Askaban, I am not!" you protested, raising your voice way too much but thankfully nobody was around.

Jess tried to work her puppy eyes again. "Please," she sobbed. "If you don't come, I'll feel guilty. Do you want me to ditch Cormac?"

"You are going with Cormac??" you asked, genuinely concerned because he was younger than you, but then you recalled he wasn't younger than her.

"Just show up," said Casey, not really allowing you to object. "I'll pay you a butterbeer."

Her offer was very, very tempting. You had no idea if one could become addicted to butterbeer since yours never had alcohol, but you're getting closer to that.

"But I'll only stay 'till nine," you informed.

The two girls smiled, and Jess had to hold herself from clapping in excitement.

"That'll be enough," said Casey.

 -

"Is your father okay?" Casey asked you as soon as Jess left, and she had the open opportunity to corner you.

She was the only one in the school that you were brave enough to confess what was happening to your father. He had been recently attacked by some Death Eaters, and the Cruciatus curse left him with severe brain damaged.

It happened during the summer, before the start of your seventh year, so you had a couple of weeks to recover from that news before going back to school.

But when your mom's first letter arrived, saying your father was getting more insane with time, no amount of preparation was enough to hold back your tears as you ran out of the Great Hall.

You were able to lie to Jess, but with Casey, you weren't so lucky. Besides, her mom worked at St. Mungo's, so she already knew about your dad way before you told her.

It had been two months since you've been ignoring your mom's letters, all of them. You are too scared to read what they've got to say, and she doesn't let you go back home anyways.

You wanted to be with him, your father, hold his hand, make him better. But your mom was firm on her decision about you graduating Hogwarts.

So, when you stared at Casey's beautiful face, you had no idea what to answer.

"He can't get better," you said, in tone way harsher than you were planning. Who knew that not speaking about a matter would make you feel more painful towards it?

Casey gulped — she was always like that: she would touch the wound, but she had no idea what to do about it later.

"Do you want me to write to my m..."

"No," you quickly answered, not even letting her finish. "I just need to graduate — then I'll deal with my dad."

"It will take longer while 'till graduation, y/n," Casey pointed out. She knew you were convincing yourself it was just a couple more months, but that was a terrible lie you no longer could satisfy yourself with.

Casey wanted to do something, but taking you out was all you allowed the girls to do to you. You hated the new club atmosphere of Three Broomsticks, but you had to admit, it was pretty distracting.

"Promise I'll see you tomorrow night?"

"Promise," you said, before leaving your best friend alone in the hallway.

 -

Snape's latest assignment stood before you, with a lot of notes from the Professor, pointing out all of your mistakes.

And there were a lot of them.

When class ended, you walked up to the Professor, gulping and shaking. You knew he didn't dislike you, but you were never too careful with Severus Snape.

"Professor, can I talk to you for a minute?"

"Yes?" he turned to face you; his black robe swirled with his movement.

"I just want to know if this essay was, hm, a big part of this year's grade?" you asked, avoiding looking in his dark eyes. "If so, can I do something else to improve my grade?"

He swallowed before answering, his serious tone implicating he didn't want to be having this conversation.

"You used to be my best student, Miss y/l/n, but this year you turned into the worse," he said, pausing in that terrible way only he knew. If your last year's grade hadn't been an Outstanding, I would have written you off my class by now."

You stared at Snape, unsure of what to do next and terrified of the man before you. He never treated you that way.

"Sorry to bother, Professor," you said, leaving right away, knowing very well that he had just ruined your rest of the day, including the night with your girls.

But what would you tell them? They would say that Snape was always like that. And even Casey, who was bloody smart, didn't have classes with Snape anymore. She would say for you to drop it too.

Your mind led your feet to the Moaning Myrtle's abandoned bathroom. There, your cry could be confused with hers by those who passed by. Thus, no one would disturb you.

The ghost wasn't even startled when she heard you come in, crying, and throw yourself on the floor near the sinks. Myrtle has seen you there since the school year started when you read your mother's first letter.

You usually went there at night, when you were sure you wouldn't see anyone. But after years of trusting Professor Snape — and believing that he would never mistreat you — what you heard today was the culmination.

When you decided you had cried enough, you headed out of the bathroom, holding your Potions (terrible) essay closer to your chest. You walked around the castle, but, perhaps, your eyes lost contact with your brain — the next thing you knew, you ran smack into Fred Weasley.

As if I needed more reasons for wanting to die.

You stumbled backwards, and your essay slipped from your arms, heading straight to the floor.

The ginger boy grasped you by both shoulders, his big hands catching you before you had the chance to slip over your own feet.

"Watch it," he said, steadying you.

You two were standing way too close to each other, and once again, you could smell his cheap cologne, this time it seemed to spread all over your body. Bloody hell, am I gonna smell like Weasley now? You shivered with disgust, but he misread it.

"Trouble standing up?" he joked, looking down at you with a cocky smirk.

He was really tall — you'd forgotten that, sitting next to him at the Three Broomsticks that night.

"Do I make you weak in the knees?"

Ignoring his stupid question, you knelt down to get the essay, and he did the same, grabbing it first. You forgot how to breathe for a second, hoping he wouldn't try to read it — and notice all the corrections Snape had made with permanent ink.

However, as soon as he grabbed it, he was handing it over to you.

You took it and brought it back closer to your chest, stepping away from him and his stupid perfume and stupid touch that sent weird and uncomfortable chills through your spine.

You were starting to walk away, leaving him behind when you heard:

"Thank you, Weasley," he attempted to copy your accent. "See you around, Weasley."

But you rolled your eyes and didn't even venture to look at him again.

-

How you managed to get out of your dorm and show up was all Jess and Casey's fault. If they hadn't been talking about you going out all week, and then Jess almost crying for you to appear, you would've rather very much stayed in bed.

You drummed your fingers on the wooden surface of the bar, your mind far away from the muggle music and your very dance-pants friends.

Your mind was tricking you in remembering about your father, something you were really trying to push away. Why hadn't you insisted on staying with Dad? Why hadn't you read mom's letters?

You kept imagining your dad, wallowing in his misery… alone. You wondered if at least your mom would visit him at St. Mungos. They were never the clingy type of couple, but maybe now she could be more sentimental.

But neither you were sentimental. So why now? Why care so much for your dad when he was never that much of an extraordinary parent?

"Evenin', Duffy."

Why did that nitwit have to sit next to you?

"Go away, Fred," you scolded, looking down at your fingers, playing with your empty mug.

"I can't, " he said. "First of all, the only reason you're here's that I taught you and your friends how to scape Hogwarts," you rolled your eyes while he continued, "besides, I'm not one to give up easily. I am set to snog one of your friends," he shrugged as if he was the biggest gentleman on Earth.

"Then go talk to the one," you suggested, not even turning to see his face.

"I would, but Fred Weasley doesn't chase girls. They chase him."

His sentence stayed in the air around as for a second before you burst in laughter. He couldn't be sober to say something like that. You faced him, finally, and confirmed — he very much had just arrived, so he wasn't drunk. He was just stupid.

Handsome, but stupid.

"Til they come to me, you get the honour of my company," he said, and then he took your mug away from your restless fingers. "Lucky for me, it doesn't look like you're armed with a beverage tonight."

You awaited for his laugh, but it never came.

"What is it with you today?"

"Already told you I'm not in the mood, Weasley," you reminded him.

"What's wrong?"

"Go...away," you warned, slowly.

You no longer good handle the tension burning inside you, it had to be released in some way, and it needed to be right then. But you didn't want to cry, not in front of a bunch of students partying, and there was no way you were going to vent with the dimwitted next to you, and punching someone would just get Rosmerta disappointed.

"Are you okay, y/n?" Fred asked, touching your shoulders carefully. He was forcing you to face him, even though he was being too gentle for his usual. "y/n?" 

Then it was like your systems had stopped working — like a magic spell went wrong. Your only excuse is that you were under an unbelievable amount of stress, and you detected an exit.

You needed a distraction, and your chance was staring at you with sparkly eyes. Regret was the last thing you were thinking about.

An opportunity sat on the barstool beside you, and you lunged at it, literally.

You kissed Fred Weasley.

You grabbed him by polo neck of his red t-shirt, pulling him closer and locking your lips on his. He froze at first, but it didn't take him more than three seconds to understand what was happening, and the hand once on your shoulder was now on you cheeks.

Fred returned your urge, biting your lower lip, making his way inside your mouth with his tongue. Your hands left his neck and went to his hair, surprised to find soft hair.

His hands flew to your sides and pulled you toward him as if his hair was the secret to his horniness. As you wrapped your fingers in the strands of red hair, his fingertips dug into your waist.

It worked better than punching someone would have. Not only did it help you release the tension, but it distracted you. It's hard to think about your dad when you're making out with somebody.

He leaned into me, and I hauled at him so hard that Fred nearly fell off his bar stool. At that moment, both just couldn't get close enough to each other. Your separate seats seemed like they were miles apart.

Nothing existed, but the physical connection — there were no emotions in the way. It was amazing not to think. Nothing! Nothing… until he screwed it up.

His hand slid up from your waist, lingering along your back, and came to a stop around your boobs. Everything flooded back, and you suddenly remembered who had his lips on yours.

As fast as you jumped on him, you leaned away, taking your hands from his hair and shoving him away.

His hands dropped, one landing on your knee, as he pulled away. He looked astonished but weirdly pleased.

"Wow, Duff, that was—", but he never finished. You were already gone, running out of the bar and rushing to get to the secret passageway.

You didn't look back. If Fred followed, once you got to Hogwarts, he turned around.

When you reached your dorm and jumped on the bed, your heartbeat was impossible to keep track. You told yourself it was because of the run back to the school, but your mind was still playing flashes of the snogging session that had just happened.

It wasn't fair to remember his touch and how out of limits he was —good kisser, but still a jerk.

You didn't want to admit it, but you were madder at yourself than at him.

 -

Two days.

That was the amount of time you managed to stay away from Fred Weasley since the little "incident".

One thing was for sure: it had numbed completely any stress your father situation was afflicting him. It had even made you forget about your recent bad grades.

Now, every time you got distracted, the only thought that filled your mind was a non-stop replay of the kiss you and Fred shared. It made you feel weirdly sick in the stomach, and you swore you could feel his disgusting touch as if it dirtied your body forever.

Jess and Casey didn't even bother arguing with you about leaving early that night — they felt guilty because they left you alone at the counter. Of course, you didn't tell them about the whole Weasley situation, but, even though Jess seemed clueless, Casey noticed your change in action.

How defensive you were towards their questions, more than usual. How you avoided spending too much time at the Great Hall.

So, when she purposely asked you to watch her Quidditch practice, you knew she was testing you. Perhaps Casey thought something worse was happening to your dad and if that was her bet, you wouldn't be the one to make her see the other side of the coin.

"Came to watch me play?" an annoying voice asked, calling your attention to your left where Fred Weasley stood flying up in his broom. His torso was tilted towards you, who was sitting in the stands.

One look was all you took for your mind to fill with disgusting memories, and your stomach was killing you once again. You faced back the field, where Casey was supposed to be practising, but, apparently, the thing was over because she and her teammates were nowhere to be found.

That explains the Gryffindor in his robes, you thought, sighing and gathering your things before getting up.

Fred was still staring at you, analyzing, expecting.

"I'm not here for you, Weasley," you spat.

Your temper surprised him, but he managed to recover before you could notice.

"What a pity," he sighed, letting the corner of his lips turn up. "I thought you wanted a second dose of fun."

You stared at him, with your angry issues burning up. If before kissing him he already had his ways of pissing you off, now it was like he was power was ten times stronger.

Your first thought was to hex him right there and then, but he wasn't worth that much worry.

"That wasn't fun, Weasley," you decided to state the obvious; something Fred seemed to have been having trouble understanding.

"You seemed very entertained twirling your fingers in my hair," he smirked, holding a chuckle while your eyes widened and you closed your fists.

"That was a mistake; I wasn't in my right mind," you said, clenching your teeth in rage. That boy was driving you crazy.

From behind him, you recognized Casey, walking on the field, already out of her Quidditch robes and holding her broom with just one hand. You knew that was your way out.

"Fine, blame it on the butterbeer," he sighed, "if it's what makes you sleep at night."

"What makes you think, Weasley," you paused, stepping closer to the end of the stands and closer to the ginger, "that I think about you at night?" you raised your tone involuntarily, letting your emotions get the best of you.

"Your body language, for one, Duff," Fred smirked again, feeling his win just because you were getting out of control.

Last time you were raged like that you had kissed him, so perhaps it could happen again.

But the nickname set you back. You were still bitter, but now you remembered why — it was because of that shallow nickname and that stupid boy.

You turned around and stepped away, to the end of the stands. You needed to get out of there as fast as you could.

"See you around too, Duff," you heard Fred shouted, but you didn't dare look back.

Casey met you at the end of the stairs, where a bunch of Gryffindors were crossing paths with the Ravenclaws leaving.

"Was that Fred Weasley? Talking to you?" was the first thing Casey asked when you were close to her enough to hear.

"Yep," you sighed, still tense because of your conversation.

"Godric! Is he hot in his Quidditch uniform!" she gasped, but different from you, she had that romantic, girly look on her face again. It made you wanna vomit.

"Please, Cass, you can find someone hotter than him," you protested, frowning.

"Someone hotter doesn't take Fred's hotness away," she argued, raising a brow towards you. She was messing with you, of course, but knowing it didn't make it easier. She didn't know about the kiss, so for all purposes' sake, she still thought you would never even touch him.

"Can't you just pine over — hmm, I don't — George Weasley, his twin?" you said, sarcastically. "If you think Fred's hot, George is too, and I'm pretty sure he's a better person."

"Too vanilla," she replied as if it proved her point.

"How would you know?" you asked, but couldn't help but burst in laughter with her, both very sure this conversation wasn't going anywhere.

Casey was right again. Not about George being vanilla — that you couldn't be sure, being that you had never talked to the chap. You couldn't manage to say more than three words to George, his presence always made you kinda weak in the knees.

But George didn't know about it, and neither did your best friends, and you intend in leaving thing at that. George was kind of your platonic crush, it was healthy to have one (probably), and he was never cross that line.

Funny, huh, how George made you feel starstruck, and Fred made you wanna kill yourself.

The thing Casey was right was about Fred being hot and charming. He was appearing more times than often in your mind, and for the rest of the week, he no longer popped as a replay of a kiss. Fred was appearing in your mind as new sexy scenarios, things a deep part of you wanted to experiment. And apparently, with him. Yikes.

You tried to convince yourself that those scenarios were with George (had happened before) but, at this point, you knew how to differentiate the two very well. And, deep down, you knew who was the ginger biting your neck and intertwining his legs in yours.

And that infuriated your guts.

 -

"You did that for what?"

Your question echoed to the Great Hall, with a dozen of heads turning to what the little show you were putting on.

It was not your intention to make a scene, but, at that moment, you were more enraged than you'd ever been your whole life. Casey was your best friend, and you knew sometimes she was bold for the greater good, but you doubted that doing what she did was for the greater good.

Because you were feeling like shit.

She had intercepted your owl with your mom's letter about your father's condition. Casey had observed that you were ignoring your mom's messages — last night she went to your dorm room with Jess for a girls night, and ended up finding accidentally a box packed with the parchments unopen.

So she planned on getting your owl before it dropped its letter over you and she managed to sit next to you and starting reading it aloud, without telling you what she was reading.

It was only when she got to the second line of the thing — "they say they are doing everything they can and they don't want to raise our hopes, because his chance of recovery is almost none"— that you realized that it was your mom's words.

You got so angry as never before, shouting at Casey to shut up, and without overthinking, you cast a fire spell on the thing. Thankfully she dropped the parchment before it burned her hands, but that doesn't mean that she didn't get angry at you too.

Jess watched and came closer, trying to find words to say, but she didn't know what was happening and she didn't want to side with anyone.

You felt the urge to cry, but, not in hell, you were doing it in front of the whole school. You gathered your bag and ran out of that place, not looking back — even though Casey was screaming "I'm sorry", and Jessica was asking you to wait.

"Hey, wait up," a voice called, this time it didn't belong to a girl.

You froze at your spot, your feet slowly turning to face the boy following you in the empty hallway. Traitors, you wanted to say to your feet.

"Not now, Weasley," you said, trying hard to look away, but once his dark eyes met yours, you just couldn't bring yourself to walk away.

"Then, when? You need to talk," he pointed out, taking his hands out of his pockets, not yet breaking the eye contact. It was like he knew that he looking at you was the only thing keeping you there.

"You heard the show, huh."

"Just saw you, angrily walking away," he said while you nervously grabbed your bag's handle. "Thankfully, there was no butterbeer in your hands."

His attempt to joke went not as smoothly as he expected. You faced your shoes, biting your lip with the stupid idea that popped in your mind. You knew what you planned wasn't right.

But when he stepped towards you, it felt natural.

"Just shut up, Weasley," you said, before getting on your tiptoes and leaning in to kiss him.

He was surprised, again, but this time he was quick to respond and somehow smarter — he grabbed your waist and guided you to a door that only he knew existed in that hallway.

It was a broom closet, probably the brooms first-years use to train flying.

This time there was no inhibition. Fred's mouth in yours was not going to be enough to forget you fighting with Casey and your mom's words about your dad. You needed more. Thankfully, Fred Weasley was more than pleased to serve, fastly taking your white shirt off while you unbuttoned his pants.

"Are you sure of this, Duff?" he asked before pulling your black skirt up.

"I said shut up, Weasley," you reminded him, in a bossy tone. And in case he tried to open his mouth again, you locked it with yours.

 -

Things were worse than ever before.

After Casey's episode, you hadn't talked to her ever since. She tried, the first few days, but she saw you were ignoring her and with time, she gave up. Jess attempted to convince you to talk to Casey, and for that, you started ignoring Jess too.

Your grades weren't getting better any time soon — Professor Snape was now no longer the only one complaining to you about it. Thankfully, the other Professors were more understanding about it than Severus — the school knew about your father situation.

Oh, yeah. About your parents: since Casey attempt to read you a letter, you haven't touched one yet. And you weren't going to do it anytime soon.

The only person you were hanging out with — by Merlin, you never thought that would happen — was Fred Weasley.

It was easygoing with him because there wasn't much talking to do. He knew better than to ask you anything related to your personal life — even though he tried, a lot.

You two would meet primarily at the Room of Requirement — it usually provided a bed for you, so that was more comfortable than any broom closet. If he ever attempted to make conversation, you'd shut him up with your lips and locking your fingers in his hair — that was his soft spot for sure.

You noticed he was trying to be your friend, more than just a hookup because he was lately scheduling your meetings in places where more people were around — therefore you couldn't just kiss him.

Today, you two were meeting after his Quidditch practice. In his defence, you had indeed mentioned how hot after-trainings sex could be, and that was, probably, where he got the idea.

You were waiting for him in the ground leaned in the entrance to the stairs to the stands, laughing with yourself, because, not long ago, when he mentioned you waiting for him at the Quidditch field, you thought the idea was absurd.

"There he is," you said, placing your hands in the back pockets of your jeans, walking side by side with a just showered Fred Weasley.

"You came."

"You said for me to come," you replied, tilting your head towards him and chuckling. It wasn't like you and any other places to be, but he didn't need to know.

"Hey, Fred, what are we..." started George, rushing to Fred's side and gasping at the notice of you. "Oh, hey, y/n."

So nice to have a Weasley calling you by your name instead of the stupid "duff" thing Fred seemed to love.

But that was George — the George Weasley — and all you managed to do was blush and nervously say hello back.

"Well, brother, got do something with y/n first, but, later, we can..."

"— don't bother with me! I'm sure we can hang out the three of us," you interrupted Fred, glad this time you didn't stutter.

Fred practically spat out a laugh, looking at you like you were crazy. "We? With my own twin?"

You pushed Fred by the shoulder, disgusted by the bullshit he had suggested.

"We can change our plans," you elaborated. "That's what I meant, Fred."

George's eyes went from you to Fred, not sure of what to say next. He didn't know what was going on between the two of you — you'd threatened Fred that you'd kill the whole Weasley family if he decided to say something.

"Are you sure? Fred and I can do the prank later."

"It's a prank? Then count me in!" you smiled, pushing Fred's shoulder again. "Why didn't you tell me?"

There was one exact reason why Fred didn't tell you — it's because you weren't interested, especially in personal stuff and principally in pranks.

"Wow, y/n, I reckon I've never seen you so excited," George commented, smiling.

The three of you started walking away from the Quidditch field while Fred mumbled something about him being the reason for your excitement — for that you replied with pinching his left arm.

-

You had never laughed so hard in your life. Fred, George and you were sitting on the floor of the empty library, leaning your backs against a dusty shelf in the dark corner of the room.

"Did you see his face?" George giggled, placing a hand over his chest where his heart was beating extra fast.

All of the hearts there were beating fast.

It was almost midnight, and by the school rules, you three should be in bed, but the amount of enthusiasm you were feeling was convincing you being a reckless student wasn't so bad.

You were sitting in the middle of the twins, your hands tossed on the floor — the left one just a couple of centimetres away from Fred's. He was watching you, paying very close attention at how the red slowly painted your face back, since it had been white because of all the running from Filch to not get caught.

"Thanks for tagging me along," you said, with a small smile, looking at George.

"Anytime," George said, thinking it was the right thing to do. "You're fun to be around. I see why you wanted to hang out with her, Freddie."

You would've teased Fred about the silly nickname if it wasn't gonna ruin the beautiful moment you and George were having.

Fred watched his twin and you, giggling with each other, talking about random funny stuff related to Argo Filch, but he couldn't hear the conversation quite well. He could only focus on how you were leaning towards George, and how, involuntarily, your hand ran away from his.

"Well, chaps, I've gotta keep going," George announced, getting up and shaking the dust out of his clothes. You pouted, saddened by the departure of your favourite twin.

Fred didn't even breathe, scared that would make his brother want to stay. It wasn't like he was addicted to you — Godric, no! — but he was really looking forward to spending some time with you. Just with you.

"So soon?" you replied, noticing that one prank and you now could speak perfectly well with George. You had no idea why it became uncomplicated, but spending time with him only made you notice what you already knew — he's very different from Fred. "See you later, then."

"See ya," George then turned around and walked out of the library, making sure he wasn't being heard.

As soon as George was away, Fred turned to you, using his hand to bring you face towards him. You allowed it, not really having much choice when he touched you like that.

"Why did want to prank with us?" he asked, looking straight into your eyes.

You shrugged, saying nothing. But something in your expression — maybe the quick thought of George — gave you away.

"George," Fred sighed, surprisingly angry, but not enough for you to notice. His hand fell from your face to his side. "You like him."

"Puff! What? No. What?"

Yeah, your reaction wasn't the best. But Fred shrugged, letting his jealous side hide and acting like a jerk because it was so much easier than caring.

"Are you only with me because I look like him?" he asked, making sure his tone sounded like he was playing with you instead of really curious.

"No!" you replied, faster than you expected. "First of all, I'm not with you. Secondly, no, Freddie," — you used the nickname to mess with him — "I didn't pick you because of George. I picked you because you were there."

Fred stayed in silence, absorbing your answer.

You were suddenly lost in your thoughts, remembering that first kiss not so long ago. And then you remembered all of those lonely nights at the Three Broomsticks, where your only companies were Rosmerta and... Fred.

"You are always there."

"Yeah," Fred sighed, not sure of what you meant with that. However, he was still in jerk mode, and for that, his hand flew back to touch you, this time choosing more sensitive regions, like your belly, particularly, above the waistband of your jeans, a place that Fred had already learned to be one of your weak spots. "So, is now when you're doing what we had scheduled to do?"

You turned to face him, making it easier for him to reach your abdomen.

"Do you only think about that?"

He pretended to be thoughtful.

"Yes."

 -

It came as a hell of a surprise when you were called to the Headmaster's office. You had been doing nothing — aside from escapades with Fred, and trying to get back to your studies, you haven't been doing much — so you didn't stall to see why they needed you.

You were even more surprised when the person awaiting fro you in the office was your mom.

"Hi, sweetie," she tried to smile but failed.

You didn't move since you opened the door and saw her, because her visit probably meant something you didn't want to be true.

"Is he dead?"

"What, sweetie? What did you say?" she asked.

"Dad. Is he...?" you whispered again, not brave enough to say it too loud.

"Oh, Merlin, no! That's why I'm here, actually. He called for you yesterday," she explained, stepping closer to you since you haven't been moving. "I sent you a letter, but you didn't reply, and I was so anxious..."

"Father called me? He said my name?" you were shocked because last time you saw him, he had no idea who you were.

"Yes, sweetie. I guess he remembers you," she smiled. "And me," she added.

"Can I see him?" you were fighting tears at this point.

"Of course, sweetie! That's why I'm here," she smiled, and opened her arms, knowing very well that all you wanted to do was bury your face on her chest, just like when you were little and scared. But this time, all you felt was happiness.

 -

Returning to Hogwarts was hard. Not because you were sad — Merlin, that had been your best weekend ever! You father was almost completely recovered, although now and then he was saying some gibberish.

It was hard to come back because you wished you'd stayed longer with your dad, but your mom knew you needed to finish your school year before anything else.

A conversation that you had with your father kept replaying in your mind since you walked in the school. It was before you left when he encouraged you to enjoy your life because he wished he had enjoyed his more — especially when he thought he was dying, having Death Eaters play with his mind.

So when you saw George in the hallway, you knew you had to do something about your whole starstruck situation.

"Hey!" you called him.

"Hi, y/n," he faced you, a smile appearing in his lips. "Haven't seen you all weekend."

"I had to be away. Dad's stuff," you really didn't want to tell him about it right there. "Anyway... I don't know how to say this, but I've been feeling incredibly confident lately, so here it goes... Would you like to go on a date with me?"

You had no idea how you manage to say it. Perhaps pranking someone together does change a person, but while you waited for his reply, George didn't seem so hard to talk to.

"You want to go out... with me?" he played with his hair while saying it.

"Yep," you gulped, suddenly regretting you recently discovered confidence.

"Okay," he frowned for a second before smiling lightly. "Three Broomsticks, Wednesday?"

"Perfect. See you there?"

He shook his head in response, then turned and walked away. You stayed there, expecting a wave of happiness to come, but it never did. That's odd, you thought, before heading to your dorm, which, weirdly enough, you had missed.

When you pushed the door open, you saw the two figures sitting on your bed, as if they had been waiting for you for a long time. Jess and Casey looked at you as you walked n, with sympathetic smiles on their faces.

"What are you two doing here?" you asked, but you weren't mad. Just curious.

You had missed them too.

"I'm here to apologize. Should've done it sooner, but you didn't allow me," said Casey, getting up and stepping closer to you. "I now know your father is better, but you were right, that letter could have something horrible written on it and had no right reading it."

You stared at her, unconsciously reaching for her hand, anxious to meet her hot touch again. You were still happy, of course, but that talk made you bit sentimental.

"I'm sorry, y/n," she said, allowing you to hug her and hugging you back in the way only she knew how. Jess jumped out of bed and embraced the two of you; although you couldn't see her face, you'd bet she was smiling and crying at the same time.

The three of you stayed like that for a while.

"But, thank Merlin, he's okay now," Casey continued, slowly pulling away from the group hug.

"How do you..."

"Fred told us," said Jess, sitting back on your bed and suggesting you two did the same.

"Fred? Fred Weasley? How did he know?" you were completely startled.

"He asked about you. The three of us were confused because, well, he was right, nobody had seen you," Jess explained. "Long story short, McGonagall told him about your dad, and he told us."

You gulped, taking in that new information. Fred worried about you, that was new. Well, you did leave with no warning, but for a not-a-friend with benefits, you never consider he would care if you disappeared.

"Did he say anything else?" you rounded, suddenly worried he could have told them about your little escapades.

"Should him? Your father is okay, right?" Casey entered a worried-mom mood, and Jess seemed to be concerned too.

"My father is getting better, yes," you replied, but now it was too late. They were curious, you sighed, knowing very well that, as your best friends, they had all the right to know what was going on. "I may — or may not — have started a no-strings-attached relationship with Fred Weasley."

"You did what??" Casey widened her eyes towards you.

You spend half an hour explaining to the girls what was going on in your sex life, and they were good listeners, never interrupting unless you paused. You missed those girly talks so much that you wondered how you managed to spend weeks not talking to them.

"Wait. But your date for Wednesday is George?" asked Jess, clearly confused with the end of your story.

"I never had the guts before," you said, remembering how only the idea of asking George out would've made you weak in the knees a year ago.

"But you like Fred," she stated, convinced she was correct.

"What? No. Why did you...? Merlin, no," you rambled. You thought you had made it clear that being around Fred longer than necessary made your stomach sick and everything.

Jess and Casey exchanged looks as if they knew something you didn't.

"Fred's repugnant. He still calls me Duff, can you believe it? I mean, 'hello, honey, if I'm such the disgusting, ugly friend, why do you sleep with me?' " you said, laughing with yourself, imagining you facing Fred and telling him that. But the girls kept with their suspicious stares. "I did explain what is Duff, right?"

"You did," said Casey.

"Still not convinced you don't like Fred, though," added Jess, raising a brow towards you.

"I don't! Besides, now, I don't need him. I'm going on a date with his brother, and my father is fine. I have no worries," you reminded them, getting up from your bed. "Well, maybe one problem. I still need better grades."

"That I can help," said Casey, allowing her nerdy Ravenclaw shine.

 -

You tried to corner Fred the whole Tuesday, but he seemed to be nowhere to be found, until after dinner, when you approached him when he was leaving. Thankfully, he was alone.

"So you are back," he said, looking you up and down in that way that only he knew. You looked around the hallway, scared that students leaving the Great Hall could hear you two talking, so you gesticulated for him to follow you to the broom closet — coincidently, where it all started was going to be its end too.

"Fred, we need to talk," you said, closing the door behind you and trying to find the light switch.

"You finally realized?" he sounded hopeful, with a playful smile on his lips.

"Realized what?"

He was set back with your response. Fred was thinking of something else when he asked you that, but he wasn't going to let you win. Although you really didn't have any idea what he was talking about.

"Realized you can't live without me."

"HA! Very funny, Weasley," you said, rolling your eyes.

He stepped closer to you, expecting you to do what you generally did in that closet, and, even though, his perfume made you lose your senses for a second (that didn't use to happen before, did it?).

"Well, I brought you here because... You see, we aren't doing this anymore," you swallowed after saying it — it was as if a knife was held in your neck.

He leaned in, looking down at you. His playful smile was long gone.

"You want to do it the right way. I get it," he said, pressing his lips together for a pause. "We could just jump to the fun part."

"Fun part? There isn't a...", but you weren't able to finish. His lips met yours mid-phrase, and as usual, you couldn't care about anything else but his lips.

What was the thing I need to tell him? Never mind now.

Your hands were playing with his hair, but something was different this time. There was still an urge — one that shouldn't be there, giving that you had no problems to forget right now — but you two were acting slowly, appreciating every touch.

When with Fred, you never felt ashamed of your body, but somehow this time you were very self-conscious, afraid that he wouldn't like you. Which was stupid — he had been... with you for too long to now started caring about your form.

What you didn't know what was that, if anything, he was finding you even more beautiful tonight, with the weak light of the closet highlighting every gorgeous curve of your body.

While you two undressed (with his lips away from yours), you were able to remember you shouldn't be there, snogging him and well, about to do other things with him. You had gone there to end this thing.

You sighed, too perplexed at the view of the ginger boy's body. The light was also highlighting his best spots.

A good-bye, you concluded with yourself. You were allowing yourself one last night, before staying away from Fred.

And if it was going to be a good-bye, you were sure you wanted to make it the best yet.

 -

When you asked George out, he had been puzzled, and really scared of what to do next.

You had never jumbled him with Fred before — and after spending so much time with his twin doing Merlin knows what he expected you to never do it.

He thought it was rather cute that you took the first step and asked Fred out. Well, you did confuse the twin, but George assumed you probably were too nervous with your own feelings.

So using his best "hey, brother, this is gonna sound funny" voice, he went to find Fred to tell him that he had a date with the girl he had pining over for the last month.

George had never seen Fred say no to other girls, neither had George seen Fred stay in the castle for a Friday night, then a skip a Hogsmeade trip. You had changed Fred, even though George was sure Fred had not noticed it yet.

"What is it, George?" Fred asked, anxious to leave and meet you, no matter where you could be. He had heard that you had just got back in the castle and he just... he wanted to make sure you were alright.

"y/n, she... well," George nervously giggled. "She mixed us. She thought I was you."

"Really?" Fred was not expecting at this stage for you to mix him with his brother.

"Yeah, and hm, this is funny," George gulped before continuing. "I think she asked you out. On a date."

"She what??"

"Yeah, I guess she was on a rush, because of her father, and she said something about feeling confident," George went on. "Anyway, I said yes because I knew you'd have said yes. It's Wednesday. At the Three Broomsticks."

Fred stared at his brother as if he had solved all the problems in the world.

"She really did that?"

George shook his head yes and pointed out: "Don't mention she mixed us. It will probably make her feel worse."

"Are you sure she thought you were me?" Fred asked, overthinking it.

"Well, of course. Why else would y/n ask me out?"

-

You had to borrow a foundation from Jess (your skin tones were not so similar, but it was enough) because on the last night, Fred had exaggerated a little.

He never left a mark on his body, but yesterday he had overcome himself. As the brush rubbed the foundation on your neck, you remembered the night before.

 "You are mine, Duff," he said, between one hickey and another. "Just mine."

 Unintentionally, you lost yourself in thought, your mind continuing its replay from the night before, as you brushed your sensitive skin.

 "Only I can make you feel this way; only my touch makes you shiver," whispered Fred, and incredibly, it was true. But he was Fred, and it couldn't go on.

So when it was over, and you both were too tired, you got dressed and stared at him, knowing what was coming next.

"Thank you, Fred, seriously. For everything," he watched you as you gulped nervously. "But this really can't go on. I have a date tomorrow."

"I know."

You were about to leave, but you immediately turned, facing him with wide eyes.

"You asked George out. I know," he seemed sad. And you have never seen Fred sad before. You wanted to do something, but what could you do really?

"Fred, I..."

"Look, you had your good-bye, y/n. You can get out now," Fred said. "Go hide. It's what you do, right?"

"Hey, don't turn this on me!"

"Somehow, this is my fault?" Fred asked while putting on his pants. Although angry, he didn't seem scary. "What you want me to do, y/n? I'm the jackass womanizer, aren't I? Go get the better twin."

"Fred Weasley!" you shouted his name, trying to shut him up. "We were never a couple; don't act as if you care now! Don't act like you're jealous!"

"Why? Because I can't be jealous of you? I can't care about you?" he shouted back.

"Care about me? You call me Duff, Weasley. All the damn time! How am I supposed to know you care about me if you keep reminding me how ugly, fat and disgusting I am?"

Silence fell upon the two of you.

That was the knife in your neck all along. The stupid nickname, it all came back to it. Fred had no idea how much power that nickname had over you.

"I never meant it that way, y/n," he said, gulping slowly.

"No?" you asked sarcastically. "Really? I remember you telling me I have hotter friends."

"But that was before!" he protested.

"Before what?" you asked, but his reply never came. The words he couldn't say died in his chest — buried forever. "See you around, Weasley, " you said, before opening the door and leaving, without looking back.

 You shook your head, slowly coming back to reality. The hickeys were enough hidden. It didn't look perfect, but the Three Broomsticks had terrible lighting, so it would be okay.

You wanted to stay in, curled up in bed, playing in repeat your good-bye, and blame yourself for that sadness in your chest, but you were too embarrassed to dump George.

The place was crowded — Hogwarts older students were practically all there, having the time of their lives on the dance floor. You wished George could never find you, so you went to the counter to hide behind a mug of butterbeer.

"Hey there, pretty," said Madam Rosmerta, who have missed you all those nights without you. "Butterbeer?"

"You know it," you said, about to throw her a coin when someone pressed a hand on your shoulder.

"Make it two," he said, and he didn't even need to speak to you know who it was. That cheap perfume was going to be the death of you. "It's on me," he told you, tossing his own coin to Rosmerta who disappeared to get the mugs.

"He's not coming," he added a second later, hating the silence around you two.

"I figured it. When I saw you," you explained, gulping.

Rosmerta brought two mugs back, and both of you took a sip from it, unsure of what to say next.

It wasn't like you two fought last night because you hated each other. In fact, it was probably the complete opposite, but both looked like stupid cowards, afraid of your own feelings.

"Look, I..." he started, but you interrupted him, placing your hand on his arm over the counter.

"Let me say this first," you said, locking your eyes on his. "I shouldn't have asked your twin out. Even if we were just friends; what I did was a jerk move."

"You liked him first," Fred pointed out, trying to defend you from yourself.

You chuckled. "Oh, Merlin, no. I thought he had a pretty face," you explained, tilting your head towards him, and he understood your joke right away, joining in the laughter. "And he seemed like a nice guy. Like, huh, I thought he could treat me nicely," you looked away from his big eyes, facing the shelves with liquor.

"But?"

"What?" you asked him, turning to face him once again.

"I feel like there was a 'but'."

You smiled.

"But you also have a pretty face, and recently, you've come to treat me nice too," you said, and he pressed his lips together while slowly shaking his head up and down. "Well, actually, if it's just between you and me, your face is prettier."

He raised his brows. "Is it?"

"And your body too," you added, just to make him smile.

"Is mine bigger?" he asked, back to his normal joker self.

You pushed him lightly by the shoulder, not hard enough for him to fall off the stool.

"Never saw his, sorry," you decided to tease, and you both giggled.

"I'm sorry. About the Duff thing and all," he said, swallowing. "I kept the nickname because I thought it was cute. If I knew it bothered you so much, I'd have stopped. And I wouldn't have used it during sex."

"I'm okay with it now, I guess," you said. "It wasn't that bad hearing it during sex if I'm honest."

You tilted your head to the left, biting your tongue to not laugh because it was not funny. But Fred just had a way to ease your mood.

You thought silence was going to hunt you two again when Fred spoke.

"Is this the part where you admit you have feelings for me?" he smirked, placing his hands on your knees, relaxing you even more.

"Maybe," you chuckled. "Is this the part where you admit you have feelings for me?"

"Yes," he said, surprising you. "I have feelings for you."

"Well, I have feelings for you too, Freddie," you smiled, passing your fingers through his strong arms.

"You're not gonna forget that nickname, are you?" he faced away while asking.

"Nope."

"Fine by me, Duff," he replied, messing with you too. He then leaned closer, pressing his lips on yours, and it didn't take long for his hands to find your waist and bring you as closer to him as the stools allowed.

"But we are going slower this time, Weasley," you warned, parting your lips for just a second.

He smiled in the kiss.

"It's always better that way," he replied, probably remembering the soft, slow sex from last night because you were sure remembering that too.

You slapped his arm just strong enough for him to pout, but you kept kissing him anyway. When you two kissed, nothing else mattered— it was only the two of you in the world.

[queenxxxsupreme]

I was wondering if you could write something with a plus sized reader? It can be any of the witchers and/or Jaskier (although I think esk, lam, & jask would work best). Can be more focused on them finding the reader attractive/hot? I see lots of fics and headcannons abt plus size readers that are all about insecurities and finding the reader beautiful and aethestically pleasing. I'm plus size and I think I am beautiful, just not... attractive. looking hot and looking pretty/beautiful are different. idk if that makes sense I just want someone to think I'm hot. It can be NSFW or funny and fluffy. if you aren't comfortable writing this that's cool too. I just really like your writing. You have created a really welcoming community/page and I felt comfortable enough asking. I appreciate it so much. Thank you. 💜

A/N: I love this ask!!! Though I’m not sure I followed the prompt properly…. :( I wanted to do Lambert very badly which is part of the reason why it took so long to do but I couldn’t make it work with the prompt so I ended up doing Jaskier. I hope you liked it babe!

Warnings: no smut but Jaskier is a cheeky bastard and suggests NSFW 18+ things so if you aren’t into that please don’t read! also mentions of poor self image but Jaskier makes it better

***

You watched the tailor and seamstress murmur to each other in a language you didn’t understand. The seamstress said something, gesturing to the skirt you wore. Then she looked back at the tailor who shook his head disapprovingly. 

Their eyes seemed to drill holes into you. You suddenly felt so stupid for letting Jaskier talk you into coming to this expensive shop to be professionally fitted for a dress to match his outfit for the gala in two nights. 

But he was just so excited about the gala. It was the first time you’d be meeting the famed Geralt of Rivia as well as a few of Jaskier’s other friends he had met on his journeys with the witcher. 

You felt saddened that he was so eager to take you to the gala. Surely you'd only make him look like a fool in front of his friends and comrades. 

“Dear? Are you listening?” Jaskier placed his hand on the back of your calf as he moved around the stool you were balanced upon. 

You brought your eyes down to him. 

“Hm? Oh, erm, yes. Of course, I-I was.” 

He frowned. 

“No, you’ve got something else on your mind. What is it?”

You shook your head, smoothing out the material to your dress. 

“Nothing, Jask. It’s fine.”

“Tell me, please.” He reached up to take your hand in his, brushing his thumb along your knuckles. 

You kept your eyes on him for a few moments before looking in the direction of the seamstress and tailor. They no longer looked at you but they were still gesturing in your direction. 

“It’s just silly, Jaskier.” You shook your head. 

“You look upset, darling. It’s not silly if it’s upsetting you. Step down for a second, my sweet.” Jaskier held your hand as you stepped down from the stool. He tucked a piece of your hair behind your ear, looking at you with furrowed brows. “Please tell me. Did something happen?”

You shook your head, chewing on the inside of your cheek. 

“Can you understand what they’re saying?”

“Of course.” Jaskier nodded. “They’re talking about putting ruffles in your skirt. Alma thinks a few would be a good idea to add some at the bottom but Derion is completely against the very thought of ruffles.”

You could practically feel the weight lift off of your shoulders. You almost laughed. 

“Really?”

“I know. I don’t think ruffles are a good idea, but Alma is an incredibly talented seamstress. She has an eye for creating beauties. But sadly ruffles will not be happening today.” Jaskier waved the two over. “With all do respect to you, darling Alma, I think we should pass on the ruffles this time.”

“Bastard.” Alma swatted her hand in his direction. 

“Let’s move on from the skirt.” Derion waved his hand dismissively. “For the bust. It’s the most important part. It will take Alma hours to bead together intricate detailing to match your doublet, Master Julian. She needs to know how you’d like it done in order to begin working.” 

“Right.” Jaskier placed his hand on the small of your back. “I’m thinking a rather cheeky neckline. Perhaps an off the shoulder neckline that goes a little deeper than what’s traditionally seen.”

“Jaskier!” Your cheeks flushed as you looked at him. 

“Darling, it will be absolutely fantastic! Show a bit of your chest off! Show everyone how sexy you are.”

“Jaskier.”

“It appears as though you have yet to come to an agreement on a top.” Derion spoke, looking between you two. “When my lady decides on what style of top she’d like, please do let us know. Until then, Alma, let’s continue with the skirt while they chat.” 

You watched the two move towards the desk off to the side of the room. 

“Jaskier–,”

“Just picture this, my love.” Jaskier cut you off, his hand leaving your back as he moved to stand in front of you. “The corset is supporting your bust, holding the girls up and putting them on display–,”

“For the entire gala to see?” You widened your eyes. “What are you trying to do? Make your friends think I’m some strumpet?”

“No! No! Of course not! I think you’d look sexy like that.” Jaskier put his hand on your hip. “And the corset will accentuate your figure–,”

“The figure I don’t have.” You turned away from him, making your way towards the chairs that sat near the windows. You were thankful the curtains were drawn. This gave you some privacy from the outside world. 

“What? That’s ridiculous. You have a figure. A marvelous one at that.” Jaskier followed behind you. 

“I have the same figure as an apple, Jaskier. Or a pumkin. Round and-and large and just.... There’s nothing you should be so eager to show off at the gala.” You sat down in one of the seats, your voice quivering as you fought to keep your emotions at bay. 

Jaskier knelt down in front of you, his hands taking yours in his own. His touch, calloused from years of playing instruments, was warm as he gave you a squeeze. 

He didn’t know what to say at first. He was upset with himself for having not noticed that you were uncomfortable earlier. He was upset with himself for making you uncomfortable.

“Love-,”

“And don’t- Jaskier, please don’t try to tell me I’m not.” You whispered, unable to meet his gaze as tears blurred your vision. “I know I am. If you deny it, it’ll be like denying that the sky is blue or that-that grass is green.”

Jaskier nodded softly, understanding your words. He let the silence sit between you for a few more moments. He reached up to wipe your cheeks. Then he moved to sit in the seat next to you, keeping your hands in his.

“You know, my favorite shade of blue is just after the sun sets.” He murmured. “It’s dark and it’s ominous, but it’s stunning to see planets begin to show even though the sun hasn’t set yet. It’s like they’re beginning to come out of hiding. And my favorite shade of green is much more specific than that. Do you remember that time we laid in the lupin field just outside of Cintra all day?”

“Of course I remember that.” You sniffled, a little smile coming to your lips. “You read and sang to me all day. It was a beautiful day.”

“That day is my favorite shade of green.” Jaskier rubbed the back of your hand. He leaned in to kiss the corner of your eye. “And that night…. That night was when I realized my favorite shade of blue, you know?”

Your heart began to race a little quicker. That evening in the lupine field had been rather romantic and intimate. It was one of your favorite memories with the bard. 

Jaskier took a deep breath, looking across the room to the seamstress and tailor for a moment to make sure they were occupied with something else. 

“Dear heart, you know I would make sure the dress they create makes you look nothing short of the goddess you are.”

“I-I don’t…. I don’t have that same faith, Jaskier.” You shook your head, looking away from him to one of the paintings on the wall. It was of a beautiful woman in a stunning violet dress. She was thinner than you and the dress she wore made sure to show what curves she had off.

“You don’t have faith in me?” He asked softly.

“I don’t have faith in myself. You keep saying I’m going to look sexy and that you want to put me on display-,”

“Y/N, I was only joking. I’m so sorry if it made you uncomfortable. I meant absolutely no harm by it.” Jaskier put his hand on your knee. “I just- My gods, Y/N. The very idea of you in the dress I envision. Everyone is going to be fucking staring. On second thought, perhaps it wouldn’t be a good idea to put you in a dress similar to that. In the off chance that I’d be able to take my eyes off of you, I’d have to fight anyone who dared to look at you.”

He wore the biggest grin on his lips and you knew he meant well by it. He really did. But your stomach churned at the thought.

“They’ll be staring because I’ll look absolutely ridiculous.” You turned your head away from him. “Ladies like me weren’t made for galas and ballgowns.”

“I happen to think you are perfect for a ballgown, my dear.” He leaned over to kiss your ear. “I know you don’t see it, but you are absolutely sexy. Hell, if I had a say in it, you wouldn’t even be wearing a gown. But there are going to be other people there and I can’t have anyone else seeing your gorgeous body.” 

Your cheeks flushed.

“Can I offer you a little deal? A peace treaty?” Jaskier suggested. You looked at him, meeting his blue gaze. “They have a dress cut similar to the one I’d like to be made for you. Can you try it on for me before we make any decisions today?”

You nodded your head, letting out a little breath. You would at least try it on and let him see how ridiculous you’d look. If you proved him wrong now, maybe he’d listen to you in the future. 

“Will it fit me?”

“They can make it work for you so you can at least get an idea of the style.”

“Okay.”

“Excellent.” He gave you a kiss on the temple before going across the room to Alma and Derion. He spoke to them in the language you didn’t know. It was a beautiful language. As he said the words he had the ability to make it sound otherworldly. How could one man, a human no less, make words sound angelic? 

Derion and Alma left the room together. Jaskier clasped his hands behind his back, leaned forward to watch where they had disappeared. Alma returned moments later alone. In her hands she held a dress. 

The dress was dark green but that was all you could tell.

“I’ll give you a moment to get dressed. Take good care of her, Alma.”

“I will. You worry about yourself, Master Julian.” Alma waved him away. 

You wanted to object, to say that you could get dressed by yourself, but you knew very well you wouldn’t be able to. You didn’t want to rip the dress. The material was probably more expensive than you could afford. 

“Take off your dress, darling.” Alma placed the dress over a nearby chair. “I’ll grab pins so that we can pin the dress in place.”

“Pin?” You repeated. “In place?”

“Yes, darling. It wasn’t made for your body. We need to make the dress work for your figure so we do that by manipulating the fabric with pins. Don’t worry, you won’t feel a thing.”

***

Alma called for Jaskier after the dress was situated properly on you. 

You nervously moved back and forth as you shifted your weight from one foot to the other to get a better look in the mirror. 

The dress fit you decently. It was loose fitting in the chest but Alma fixed that with pins. She pinned a few other spots too but they were in the back so you couldn’t see all that well. 

The material was a beautiful emerald green silk with darker green embroidery around the bust. The off the shoulder neckline wasn’t terribly low in the middle where it dipped down, but it was lower cut than what you would usually wear. 

“Now remember, darling. The corset will be tighter on you and be providing support.” Alma spoke as she moved around the stool you were resting on. 

“My gods, Y/N! I love it!” Jaskier clapped his hands together. “Just wait until we get it in the blue to match my doublet!”

“Alma!” Derion called for Alma. 

Alma excused herself, leaving you alone with Jaskier. 

He moved around the stool, admiring the dress on you. 

“Before I lose myself in my own thoughts, love, what do you think?” Jasier clasped his hands together and held them near his mouth. 

You looked back to the mirror, shifting a little. 

“I don’t…. hate it as much as I thought I would.” You admitted. 

“But do you like it? Are you comfortable with the style? Be completely honest with my, darling. If you aren’t, there is no worry at all! I’ll have them make a style you are comfortable in. I want you to be comfortable first. No matter what you wear you will be absolutely gorgeous and breathtaking and I will be ripping the dress off of you come the end of the night.”

“Jaskier.” You scolded. He gave you a cheeky smile. “I do like the cut and I like the off the shoulder part, but perhaps if we could add sleeves to it?”

“Of course! Oh that would be stunning! I’ll let Alma and Derion know. Anything else you want to add or take away?”

“I don’t think so.” You looked back to the mirror. “I think I’ll like it more once it’s in the blue. I do like the green, but the blue will match your doublet for the gala. And the green makes me sort of feel like a melon.”

Jaskier frowned.

“I wish you’d stop comparing yourself to fruits.” 

“Would you rather a toad? ‘Cause I look like one of those in this dark green too. A rather large toad.”

“If you are a toad, then what would that make me?” He held his hand out for you so he could assist you in stepping down from the stool.

“My pretty princess.” You giggled. 

“Hmm. Well you are the sexiest toad I have ever seen.” He pulled you into his arms. “But I rather like calling you a fruit. You taste just like one-,”

“Jaskier!”

Taglist: @pressedinthepages @mishafaye @whitewolfandthefox @wolfyland07 @belalugosisdead @persephonehemingway @keira-hulmaster @dinonuggs69 @greatestauthorofmygeneration @shadow-hunters-lover @dancingwith-thesunflowers @tedi-fach-las @thecomfortofoldstorries @natkowaa @disasteren @weathervanes-my-oneandlonely @onlyhenrys @wackylurker @criminaly-supernatural @magpie343 @permanently-exhausted-witcher @genderfluid-ho @the-space-between-heartbeats @havenoffandoms @carriebee1 @ger-bearofrivia @naominami @writingawaymylife @reaganjenelle @theawkwardpedestrian @scarlettwitcher @badassspaceprincess @just-a-sad-donut @summersong69 @an--actual--human--disaster @rubyqueen819 @omgkatinka @c-a-v-a-l-r-y @vonxcon @mazakeen @bravelittlesunflower @thereagles @awkward-turtles-world @menalliha @cotton_mo @maan24 @thefirelordm @monkeymo @krenee1drful @nympha-door-a @unadulteratedtreecrusade @Aquarius-pisces-rose @mentallyscreamingsincebirth @fl0ating @sometimesiwrite @you-fxcking-wish-bish @thanks-bruh-for-nothing @maan2442 @thegaydeath @creatingstuffinpeace @wellthisstinks @andyrazzledazzle @ameliasmistake @winterwolf @caraqas @bluscryn @thefirelordm @y-napotat @henrycavillbesty @ta-ka-shi-ma @sulkyshengshou @spaced-out-state @thecollection @mayday1284 @babietrain @wandering-poetess @redneckstrash

If your name is in italics, it wouldn’t let me tag you :(

[jenomark]

➔Pairing: Taeyong x Reader ➔Other Members/ Characters: Ten | Johnny  ➔Genre: Smut (w/ plot!) ➔Warnings: Weight is mentioned a lot | Self-esteem & Self-worth issues | Could be triggering for people with weight issues | Fingering | Vaginal sex | Oral (M) ➔Word count: 4,321

➔Summary: For many reasons, you haven’t had sex in a long time. Though you love yourself and your bigger body, you’re always aware that other people might not. After a bad night with someone who didn’t want to be seen in public with you, your best friend Ten offers to set you up with his friend Taeyong. 

*This is very body positive, but it does deal with a lot of negative things that are very close to reality for most people. I tried to portray things as accurately as I can, given my own experiences. I know not everyone’s experience is like mine. It’s a very honest outlook on having a one-night-stand or FWB relationship while being a bigger girl. 

  Mr. No Name. He hit all the right notes and strokes. He was attractive and mildly interesting. More importantly, he said he didn’t care what you looked like, or that it had been awhile since you’d had sex. His clothes flew off mid-air, and you watched them land here and there. Mistakes never landed in one spot, you thought. They peppered your life like seasoning, and even so, life had been tasteless, as of late. You still found yourself craving the morsel that would poison you.

“Can you give me a moment?” you asked.

  Nameless stretched across your bed like a God, his arms draped out in what he must have pretended was satin. IKEA might have felt honored. When he spoke, he told you to hurry back quickly. He said he didn’t have that much time, but you suspected he was the type to fuck and leave. 

  “Okay.” you said.

  You left your bedroom, not really thinking that you’d just left a stranger to rummage through your personal belongings. You went into the bathroom and turned off all the lights. You didn’t want to look at your body stuffed into the lingerie you carefully picked out for the occasion. You didn’t want to know what he saw when he looked at you. You hated that you were that girl, but old habits die hard, or rather, they come back from the dead and pick you apart until you’re just bone.

  Sex. It never mattered much to you. You would consume it when it came, just a notch above feeling grateful that someone would stick themselves inside of you. You didn’t know if it didn’t matter because it didn’t, or because you couldn’t fathom caring so much about someone that didn’t care for you back. It was easier to skip the hurt altogether and go straight for the parts where you ate the ice cream without the excuse.

“Get a grip.” you told yourself in the darkness.

  It had been awhile since you’d had sex because, despite being happy in your own skin, you were still terrified of someone seeing you naked. It was hell to explain how fulfilled you felt as your own person until a man looked at you and diminished your worth by calling you the most unfuckable person in the room. It was so easy for someone to tear down years of hard work and self-reflection for a two second shame fest by a stranger in a passing car, yelling about your weight, or what you should and shouldn’t be eating. And, yes, you hated that you cared what people thought of you, even after all this time.

 Enter: Mr. No Name. You called him that because he gave you an alias to call him by, and the fake name didn’t sit well with you. You wanted to ask him why he didn’t want you to know him, but deep down, you already knew. No one wants to be seen with the fat girl. You knew you were completely right when you asked him for coffee, and he looked as if you’d asked him to march around town with a parade float tied to his leg. Not everyone would look at the straight-sized man and the plus-sized girl and think negatively, but there would always be people who were still looking. Maybe you didn’t want to be seen as much as he didn’t want to be seen. Maybe you were also the problem.

 Still, you were horny and touch starved. After all, all you wanted from him was sex. That was the agreement. And you loathed yourself for briefly wanting more, for looking at him and his desire for you, and thinking that it could extend beyond the bedroom. Silly you for wanting what some people had. You had to forgive your own poor self-esteem and hope that others would, too.

 When you went back to your bedroom, he had passed out on your pillow. He was hugging the other one, his naked body smooth against the fabric. In his sleep, the prospect of him didn’t seem as scary as you thought. You wouldn’t hold it against him. You woke him and told him to put his clothes back on. 

“So what?” he said. “Things don’t work out. It wasn’t meant to be.”

  You looked over at Ten and felt that he was completely missing the point. It was your fault. You were never honest about how you felt because you didn’t want to bring attention to it. He knew your lingering insecurities as well as anyone, but there were things he could never truly understand. Last thing you wanted was for someone to pity you, or worse, think you’re just making it all up in your head. 

“I want sex,” you said. “I think I’m drying up down there.”

“Dating apps.” Ten said, as if his genius idea would save you. 

“Absolutely not.”

“You have to start somewhere.”

“I’m not a fetish,” you said. “Dating apps make me realize why I don’t date in the first place.”

“If you wait for things to happen organically, you might miss out,” Ten said. “Do people still do newspaper ads?”

“Are newspapers even a thing?” you asked.

  You and Ten looked at each other and shrugged. There were so many things you understood about each other. You sat down and wiped sweat from your forehead. You were supposed to be cleaning your apartment. There was something about deep cleaning that soothed you. And Ten was supposed to be helping, but he was sipping his hot tea and playing around on his phone.

“Can I be honest with you?” you asked.

  It felt like now or never. He didn’t need to know everything, just a little bit where you were coming from. There were sirens going off in your head telling you not to say anything to him. Your big mouth couldn’t stop once you were dead set on something.

“Always,” he said, putting his phone down. “Is this about the date?”

You nodded. “It’s about me, too. I’m..I don’t love the body I’m in..sometimes..other times, I love her. She gets me from point A to B. She makes me feel sexy. Forget what makes you healthy and what doesn’t. I don’t listen to anyone else but my doctor. All I know is that I love myself, from my ridiculous long second toe, to my double chin. All of it. And I think that scares people away, and I think I let them scare me away, too.”

“Was he that bad?” he asked.

“He didn’t want to be seen with me. Before we entered my apartment, he asked if anyone knew he was there,” you said. “ I would have cried if I was any other person. You know, I’m not even mad that he was like that. At this point, I expect that more than I don’t. I’m mad that, for one moment in time, I really expected him to be different. He kept saying how much he loved my body, and I didn’t get fetish feelings from him. I thought, “Wow, he could really be the one. He could be the fuck buddy of a lifetime.” Despite fucking it up in so many other ways, he made me feel like a person. I felt wanted.”

“He sounds like a dick.” Ten said.

Slowly, you nodded in agreement. At the same time, you and Ten sipped your drinks, lost in thought. 

Then, as if he remembered something important, Ten tilted his head and said, “I know a man.”

“That’s great,” you said, dryly. “I know a lot of men, too.”

‘“No,” he said, slapping the table. “I have a friend.”

  You raised your eyebrows. You thought about being sarcastic, but Ten wasn’t paying attention. It was no fun if he didn’t play back. He was excited by his own thought process, the wheels in his head spinning. 

“You just want sex!” he said.

“Correct.”

“With someone who will be seen with you in public,” he continued. “So they don’t kill your lady boner. I know a friend who will do that for you.”

“No.” you said, flatly.

“Why not?”

“I’m not a charity case,” you said. “I don’t want a man to fuck me just because he feels bad.”

“This guy isn’t like that.”

  You wanted to say that all guys were like that, but that way of thinking didn’t help anyone. It wasn’t true. You knew there were men out there who were what you wanted, you just didn’t know why they were halfway around the world. You thought of Ten’s friends, which were also your friends, by default.

“Which friend?” you asked. “All of them are with someone. Besides, I wouldn’t have sex with any of them. It would be too weird.”

“You don’t know him.”

“But I know all of your friends.”

“Not this one,” Ten said. “He’s in my art class. You’ll love him. Come to Saturday’s class. I’ll introduce you.”

  They say fat girls shouldn’t wear overalls. You looked at your tummy in the reflection of a car and pressed your hands against it. Your thighs looked like they were bulging in the little shorts. You shook your head to rid yourself of the thought demons that tried to make you think you were anything less than sexy. Whenever it came to the opinion of men, unfortunately, they liked to show up and rear their ugly heads. You looked adorable in your overalls, and you’d look smokin’ hot out of them.

 You weren’t good at art, so you didn’t know how to dress up, or how to behave. You showed up and stood by a bunch of people smoking cigarettes and gossiping. You thought the atmosphere would be more like the movies, and you thanked yourself you didn’t show up in some ridiculous scarf and a beret. 

“You’re earlier than I am,” Ten said, hugging you from behind. “That’s not something I can get used to. You look like an art ho.”

“What is an art ho?” you asked.

  Self-consciously, your eyes started going towards your reflection. Ten took your arm and led you inside, past the smokers, and right through a door into a cool and brightly lit studio. Ten came every week, and you could see why. The place had a cheery vibe, and everyone around you was smiling and sitting down at an easel. There was food in the corner of the room and all of these prints on the wall that you could look at for hours.

“So,” you said, sitting down. “We just...paint things?”

“Yes, “Ten said. “We get a theme for the day. No rules. No stress or worries. It doesn’t matter what it looks like. All that matters is that you have fun.”

“That’s easy for you to say, you’re a great artist.” 

Ten blushed. “I try my best.”

  Taking your place and watching everyone slowly trickle into the class, you noticed how attractive everyone was. You didn’t know what Ten’s friend looked like. You didn’t even know his name. You imagined him in your head, building him up like a clay figure. He had eyes and a nose, he was tall and resembled a beautiful marble statue. You looked around the room and realized there were mostly couples, their eyes finding each other wherever they went. Your eyes kept swimming around the room, too, even as the class began. And that’s when you saw him.

“Whoa.” you said underneath your breath.

  He was beautiful. He was tall, like you imagined. So much of his broad shouldered body peeked out from behind his easel. He had black hair, which he swept back from his forehead. He had a smile permanently fixed to his face, and the warmest brown eyes you had ever seen. You physically gulped before nudging Ten.

“Who is that?” you asked. 

Ten smirked. “That’s Johnny. All the girls love him.”

  You were all the girls. You couldn’t stop staring at him. You wondered if painting him would be too creepy. As class began, you tried focusing on the project at hand, but your eyes kept going back to him.

“I need to get laid, “ you whispered. “I need to get laid so badly.”

“Will you relax,” Ten whispered back. “I don’t need you climaxing in front of my class. I think that’s frowned upon.”

  You forgot about Johnny as best as you could and painted the sexiest fruit bowl of your life. You were proud, tired, and most of all, itching at the chance to talk to Johnny. You were thankful for Ten in that moment, so thankful that you could have kissed him. But, your attention was not on Ten. You were thinking about Johnny’s big body slamming you down onto your bed and fucking the still life out of you.

“I want you to meet him now.” Ten said. 

  You stood fast, your knee knocking into the easel. Several people looked your way because of the loud noise. You waved and tried to shake off the embarrassment. Johnny stood too, his face a model of perfection. He was so happy that it was infectious.

“He’s a little too attractive.” you said. 

“Johnny?” Ten asked. “I guess so.”

  Ten ushered you forward. As you were getting ready to extend your hand out to Johnny, Ten kept pushing until you were in front of the easel at the end. A man stood up and wiped his hands on his jeans.

“Hello, “ he said. “I’m Taeyong.”

  You were speechless. You cursed yourself for automatically thinking it was Johnny. The look on your face must have said it all, because Ten needed to cover for you. He told Taeyong your name after fixing you with the longest side-eye in human history.

“Taeyong,” you said. “Right. I’m sorry. I’m just...so..in love with your painting.”

  You looked at his painting. It was chaotic. The fruit were different colors and they were all smashed, the seeds ripped out, and the juices flowing. He had more paint on his hands and arms than what was on the canvas. 

“This?” he asked. “Thank you. Painting gives me energy.”

  Ten put his hand on your shoulder and said he was going to clean up his station. You couldn’t recover from the initial embarrassment, so you offered to go help him.

“It’s okay if you don’t like what you see,” Taeyong said. “I understand.”

  Ten gave you one last “I will fuck you up if you ruin this for yourself” glance before disappearing. Everything in you felt apologetic towards Taeyong. It wasn’t even about him. 

“It’s not you.” you said.

Taeyong laughed. “That’s usually how the saying goes.”

“No!” you said. “Really, it’s not you. You’re wonderful.”

  And you meant it. Though he was different from Johnny and different from what you expected, Taeyong was very handsome. In your mind, you didn’t judge the way he looked because you didn’t want him to do the same to you. You knew how it felt too well, which is why it hurt you that he was feeling that way.

“Can I be honest?” you said. “I think I fucked this up. Ten didn’t tell me anything about you, and I thought you were someone else.”

“Ahh,” Taeyong said. “Imagine the disappointment.”

  You could feel yourself growing dizzy.  You took a seat in the chair next to Taeyong. When you stood, you were a little taller than him. When you sat, your body felt massive in front of his smaller frame. You looked into his face, into his eyes which didn’t look as upset as they should have been.

“I’m an idiot,” you said. “All these years wanting people to censor themselves for me, and I end up doing it to someone else. Can we start over?”

Taeyong sat. He placed his hands between his thighs and nodded. The way he moved was so cute that you couldn’t help but smile.

“Taeyong,” you said. “Would you like to come home with me?”

“Y-e-eesss.” he said, drawing the world out cutely.

  You found yourself back in your bedroom, in a role that seemed too familiar. You were starting to feel scared that Taeyong only came back because of some fat fetish. He had been seen with you in public, had even reached for your hand on the walk back to your apartment, but fear had a way of resurfacing in intimate spaces. 

“This is nice,” Taeyong said, gesturing up at the painting above your bed. “I draw on my walls, but this is much more sophisticated.”

  You couldn’t seem to talk. Your mouth was dry. You asked him if he wanted a drink so that you could have one to loosen up. He said he didn’t drink much because his neck got all splotchy and red. You skipped the drink and disappeared into the bathroom, like a coward.

“We’re here again,” you said to yourself. “Just fuck him al-”

  There was a knock at the bathroom door. You turned on the lights and opened it slowly to see Taeyong standing there. 

“Are you okay?” he asked.

“I’m good.”

“It’s just that,” he said. “You’re talking to yourself. I talk to myself sometimes, too. Do you want to do this another time?”

  He looked so sweet that something in you just toppled over the edge. You didn’t say no. You didn’t say yes. You crossed the threshold and kissed him, grabbing the back of his head. The kiss itself was so soft and tame that you kept trying to make it more aggressive. Taeyong released his lips from yours and rubbed his mouth. He laughed nervously and looked down at the floor. His lips were red and swollen, his eyes more lustful than before when he finally looked back up at you. He stepped forward and kissed you, pressing his body up against yours. Normally, feeling someone's tummy against yours would make you retreat, but you were so lost in the moment that you didn’t notice. 

“Bedroom?” Taeyong asked.

“Yes.”

  It was Taeyong who guided you to your own bedroom. Your eyes went straight to the painting above your bed. There was a new appreciation for it. When you looked back to Taeyong, he was looking at you like he was looking at art: admiring, questioning.

“You’re nervous,” he asked. “Why?”

“It’s been a long time since I’ve been with someone.” you said.

  You and Taeyong sat on the edge of your bed. You were itching to kiss him, but you felt that the questions on the tip of his tongue would get in the way.

“Being nervous is okay,” he said. “But I want you to know that I’ll take my time and make it enjoyable for you.”

  He leaned in to kiss you, his hand pushing your hair out of the way so that he could rest it on your cheek. Your hand was on his thigh. Things started escalating, like you were both trying to one-up the other. Taeyong’s hand was on your breast, trying to figure out the machinations of the overalls. You were rubbing his leg a little too much. He had to ask you to stop or he'd explode. You laid back on the bed and let him hover above your body. Your thighs felt extra jiggly when his hands caressed you. You felt yourself clamming up, and Taeyong sensed it and stopped.

“I’m not entirely comfortable with my body sometimes.” you admitted. 

“Do you want to stop?” Taeyong asked. “We can watch movies or play board games?”

“Board games?” you asked.

He shrugged. “I like games.”

 You wanted to laugh. Taeyong was much different from Mr. No Name. Being with him felt less like a performance. It was like you were being intimate with a friend, only intimacy looked a lot like awkwardness. 

“I don’t want to stop,” you said. “Do you?”

“No.” Taeyong said.

  He sloped down to kiss you. His hand continued moving up your thigh and into your shorts. Having someone's fingers inside of you after not having anything for so long felt like an epiphany. You moaned and stopped kissing Taeyong. Not because you wanted to stop exploring his mouth, but because you couldn’t contain your excitement. You opened your legs and let him finger you, his skinny and long fingers jerking in and out of you with zeal. 

“Don’t stop,” you moaned. “Don’t stop.”

  You came around his fingers quickly, your hand reaching out to grab his wrist. He delicately kissed the side of your neck, double chin and all. You took a minute to catch your breath, but Taeyong was all over you. He unhooked your overalls. He lifted up your shirt to reveal your stomach. Checking to see if it was okay with you first, he kissed your soft flesh. You moved further up the bed so that his face was down below. He helped you remove the outfit, and you finished it off, sitting up on your bed naked and fighting the urge to cover yourself.

“Don’t tell me I’m beautiful,” you said. “Don’t say anything at all about my body. Tell me about yours.”

  Taeyong smiled in understanding. He yanked his shirt over his head and pointed at his scar. The pink jagged line was shiny. You yearned to place your lips against it. 

“A scar,” he said. He brought his hands up his body, his ribs noticeable. Seductively, he brought his hand back down until his fingers caught on his zipper. It didn’t take much for Taeyong’s baggy pants to fall to the ground. He slipped off his briefs to reveal his soft cock. “Can I show you my body?”

“Yes.”

  He was going to come to you, but you scooted to the edge of the bed. You didn’t love the way your body looked while you were sitting, but your attention was saved by Taeyong’s cock. You took over, working him in your hands, and watching as he came to life. You leaned down to suck him, enjoying how he whimpered from the warmth of your mouth. You stopped momentarily to kiss his scar before you were back at it, drawing him closer and closer. Before he could spill, you let him go and climbed back onto the bed on all fours, your ass facing him. The position was easiest for you. You didn’t have to look at men when they fucked you, your fat moving rabidly, and your mind wondering how distracted they were by your body. You waited for him to come to you and thrust his cock into you from behind, but Taeyong didn’t. 

“I want you on top,” he said. “I want to see you.”

  You watched Taeyong lay on your bed, his body just below the painting. He was relaxing in a bunch of pillows, and he was smiling. If you went on top of him, his small frame seemed like it would disappear underneath you. The thought of your thick thighs rubbing against him made you queasy. Yet, there was something so sexy about him wanting you that carried you forward. It was an interesting situation. 

“Are you sure?” you asked.

Taeyong lifted his arms behind his head. “Ride me.”

  You gripped his thighs and climbed on top of him. You were hyper aware of your body touching his. You lifted your ass up and tried to situate yourself. As you did, Taeyong’s hands were all over you. He poked and prodded you, smoothing his fingers over your skin and exploring everything there was to see and not see. At first, you froze in place. You had never had anyone feel your body like that, like a painter painting a canvas. You could feel his brush strokes as you closed your eyes, his fingers moving over your nipples, and the way he touched you when he went between your legs. 

  Lowering yourself down onto his cock, you had to slowly let him in. Every inch was felt, moving inside of you so intensely that every time you moved back up just a little, you wanted to lurch forward in pleasure. Taeyong held your waist and kept his hands there as you rocked over him slowly. 

“I forgot how good this felt.” you said.

  You hadn’t ridden someone since university. It was the second time ever, and the first time with someone you could actually see yourself liking. You tried pushing the L-word thoughts out of your head. You and Taeyong were only having sex, not dating. 

“Faster.” Taeyong said, the words coming out of his mouth surprising him.

  You rode him faster, trying not to think too hard about the way your body bounced, or how it looked. He touched you as you fucked him, his hands getting increasingly more desperate. The way he looked up at you made you feel bold. You pressed down on his chest and started fucking yourself on his cock with a new pace, your body slamming down on him hard. The sounds of your bodies slapping together was loud, and at one point, you slowed down because you were scared you were hurting him.

“No,” he moaned. “Keep going.”

  You fucked him until you came, throwing your head back and riding the wave. Taeyong watched you with awe, even when you didn’t stop moving. You wanted him to come, wanted to finish him off the way he deserved.

“Give it to me,” you said, fucking him. “I want it, Taeyong. Come for me.”

  You pushed your breasts against his chest and kissed him. The moan that broke free from his lips was loud and whiny. You kissed his neck and kept taking his cock until he came, his body stiffening before relaxing. You let him stay inside of you long after he had come, his fingertips drawing love hearts on your skin.

“I was thinking,” Taeyong said. “Tomorrow we should get that drink.”

[ssa-sugar-tits]

i missed you

request : this one

pairing : derek morgan x cadet!reader

summary : an fbi cadet reader asks her old friend, derek morgan, to help her train and suppressed feelings surface.

content warnings : annoying time jumps (leave me alone), swearing, awkward ass reader, insecurity, good old sexual tension

gif credit : @rewrotethestars

-

All it took was a call to an old friend. One who'd left for the FBI not long after you'd met. Communication didn't completely fizzle out, every once in a while you'd see how the other was doing. You'd crossed each other's minds as something that could have been but simply weren't-- and that was okay. So why did you reach out? You can't really say.

-

Derek's phone rings in the back pocket of his jeans, barely noticable over the blaring music of the dim lit club. The name appears in large letters and he redirects his attention with dark furrowed brows, earning pouts from the women fawning over him.

"Y/N?" His deep voice questions and you almost hang up. He doesn't sound very happy to hear from you.

"Hey Derek, it's me. I mean clearly it's me, since you already saw my caller ID. What I mean is..." you trail off, fumbling over your own words. Surprisingly he chuckles and puts you at ease.

"It's nice to know you're still you, hot stuff. So what's up?"

Hot stuff.

His stupid nicknames always felt like home in an odd way.

"Sorry if you're busy but I'm finishing up my time at the academy and I was wondering if you'd help me train." God, you sound ridiculous. "S-Since you're all badass and built and I'm not, you know?"

You wince at your sentence. Why didn't you stop talking? A warm laugh escapes him and you can hear a smile in his voice that makes you smile too, despite the fact that it's probably at your expense.

"You think I'm badass and built? I'm glad that's what stuck in your mind about me after all these years. I'd be more than happy to help you, just let me know when."

"I will, thanks Derek."

And you did. The rest is history.

-

Derek was ecstatic to hear from you. Your presence always lingered in his heart like a beautiful ghost.

"Okay, spill." Penelope's flirty tone sings to the unsuspecting profiler in the elevator.

"Spill?" Derek cocks an eyebrow.

"Spill about where you've been so excited to go. It doesn't take a profiler to figure out when someone captivates the Derek Morgan."

"It's not like that, babygirl. I'm helping a friend in the academy train, that's all."

That's all? Rich, Morgan.

"A female friend I presume? One who makes the sexy biceps of your heart flex?"

"I'm going to pretend I didn't hear that last part but yes, Y/N is a woman. It doesn't mean anything."

An exaggerated sigh leaves the blonde and she taps a finger on the desk.

"Whatever you say, twelve-pack. Just know that your girl's rooting for ya. Not that she'll be able to resist you exercising."

Derek laughs heartily at her wink and steps out of the building.

"Is that her?" she gasps, seeing you leaned against his car awaiting the dark man. "She might just be sexier than you are."

You wave innocently and give a hopefully not too awkward, tight lipped smile. Penelope smirks at Derek's obvious awe of you, taking in the sight as if you were a vivid sunset about to disappear. You'd never guess that though, would you? Why would a man like him want you? The answer is he wouldn't. But a girl can dream.

"Took you long enough," you laugh and turn to the brightly dressed woman beside him. "You must be Penelope? Der's mentioned you before."

Der? Penelope taunts with silent feline eyes.

"The one and only! I've heard about you too, Y/N."

"Oh!" you're startled when she brings you into a hug and whispers, not at all subtly.

"Have fun training."

Derek scrunches his face in embarrassment. You must know why she's teasing.

"Goodbye lovelies, enjoy yourselves!" She waves goodbye.

"She was... interesting," you say playfully. "I like her."

Is that all you have to say? Judging by the way you open the car door and plop down, yes. Yes, it is.

-

Arriving at the Quantico gym, you turn to your new trainer and beam.

"Alright. Where do we start, teach?"

"The fitness test is going to put you through core challenges and test your overall endurance out in the field. It's best to take this at your best level so we'll start wherever you want."

How does he make an FBI qualification sound sexy?

"Uh... core is a good place to start. Give me a sec to change."

"No problem."

Of course he'd change too. But it still catches you by-- very pleasant-- surprise when you return to see him in gym clothes. His dark, toned arms are completely exposed and the built pecs of his chest are barely covered by his tank top. It grips to his abs and the shorts he's wearing... they do not leave his calves to the imagination.

"Like what you see?" he teases confidentally, showcasing his perfect white teeth. Shit, he caught you staring. And of course had to taunt you.

As if he isn't enjoying the view too. Your sports bra and active wear shorts aren't exactly modest.

"No! I mean yes! I was just admiring, you're very fit."

You want to cringe at yourself. Way to go Y/N, not creepy at all.

"Not so bad yourself, Y/N. Why don't we start with stretching?"

"Okay," you nod and follow his movements. Bringing an arm up over your head, you turn and gasp lightly at the sight of his tank top lifting. If one thing hasn't changed, it's those fucking abs. Being distracted while exercising isn't such a good thing however and you topple over into his arms.

"Woah! I got you," Derek reassures and steadies you.

"Yeah I'm alright-- thanks."

His eyes are so pretty. They scan yours with a love you wouldn't comprehend. So chocolate and ocean like. You could lose yourself in them... Oh god. You are losing yourself in them.

"So, what now?" you blurt, jumping back from his grasp and almost making him frown. He'd rather be close to you but he'd never let you know. A womanizer, isn't he? He's on Reid's level of charm when it comes to you. You're different, somehow, some way.

"The best core exercises to begin with are crunches and sit ups, we can move on to variations afterwards." he explains, lips moving with silk precision.

"Got it!" you nod enthusiastically. Derek lays on his back for a demonstration, allowing you to enjoy the show as his arms bend behind his head and his body curls up to his knees.

Always the charmer, always the angel.

Something about him right now, whatever it is.

It's too much to ignore anymore.

With a burst of confidence and passion, you hop onto his lap and rest your hands on his racing chest.

"I really missed you Derek."

As scandalous as this would seem to anyone who walked in right now, the moment was nothing if not pure.

"I missed you too baby."

You lower your body and gently brush his lips with yours. His hands find their rightful place in your hair and his tongue guides yours into bliss. Tilting your head, you melt deeper into the long overdue kiss and breathlessly pull back.

"Training's a lot more fun than I thought it'd be." You whisper and rest your head against his.

"We should do it again sometime." He returns.

"Is that a promise?"

He chuckles and brings music to your ears.

"It always has been, pretty lady."

And it always will be.

-

masterlist

-

[ticklikeabomb]

One-Shot : Unique

Pairing: Angel Reyes x Plus Size Reader

Request Anon: Can I request a EZ or Angel imagine where the girl is plus size of course but she’s insecure about her body in a lingerie set she got and EZ or Angel tell her and show her how beautiful they think she looks? Can be smutty and fluffy?

Warnings: Language, SMUT (18+), fluff

Word Count: 1.5k

A/N: I hope you’ll like it :) 

You were an extremely stubborn person. Every time you would hear someone comment on an issue that concerned you or how some type of people, physically speaking, would be able to do things that you couldn’t, you would do everything in your power to prove them wrong. That’s how you ended up knowing how to do splits, gymnastics, pole dance, wear (tight-colorful-stripped-bikini) clothes that were deemed unflattering to your figure. Everything that would go against your capacities as a plus size person, you would stubbornly prove how wrong they were.

That was what seduced Angel. Your ability to stay calm, composed before showing up days, weeks, months later with the ability to show how some people’s conceptions were wrong. Well that but also the fact that he finds you gorgeous, sexy, funny, kind, compassionate, open-minded and so much more.

You were finishing cleaning up your work desk before making your way out to pick up Leticia. Coco had asked you if you could spend some time with her while he had some club business to attend to. You happily accepted, using the opportunity to get to know her more. The first time you met, you noticed she was reticent towards you but she quickly warmed up thanks to your joyful and confident personality. Besides, she noticed how much the club loved you and realized if they did, then you truly must be someone great and deserving of a chance.

Here you both were, walking around the store’s aisles, trying to find some outfits for Letty’s coming up first day of school. “What about this?”, you asked her while showing her the slim jeans paired with a simple white t-shirt and a leather jacket. She analyzed the outfit and smiled content. “It’s not bad. I’m sure Coco will approve”, she said. You chuckled and nodded in agreement. You checked some other stores before you noticed her eyes longing on a particular store. Turning to where her gaze was fixed, you slightly smirked. “Come on, let’s go check”, you said and entered the lingerie store. You choose a set each. A sober, simple ensemble for Letty and a sexier one for you.

After dropping her off, you headed home surprised but happy to see Angel’s bike at the porch. “Babe?”, you chanted when entering your apartment. You found him on the couch watching soccer, at the crossover of taking a gulp of his beer and yelling at the players. A smile graced his face when he saw you staring at him. “Hey, didn’t hear you come”, he stood up and captured your lips in a small kiss. You hummed, your hands circling his neck to intensify the kiss. “Missed me?”, he teased. You bite your lip and nod. “I’m gonna take a shower”, you tell him while he goes back to his game.

You did the full combo: hair, body, shaving, body lotion, face mask. Immediately you felt more relaxed and decided to try on the lingerie set you bought at the mall. Since the store was almost closing you decided to take it and return it the next day in case you didn’t like it. Lifting the stripe of your bra, you looked yourself at the mirror. Your smile faltered by the second, your brows frowning and your eyes scanning your figure in it. Something was bothering you. Was it the color? The sizing? The design, maybe? You didn’t know but you felt uncomfortable, insecure even. A negative feeling you tried to battle for years. In a world where the beauty standard body was thin, you felt invisible. That feeling of invisibility deepens every time a brand uses the body positivity movement to expand their clientele by showcasing an “acceptable” plus size body. Rarely one like yours. You were round, soft, plus size, curvy, voluptuous, fat – chose your word but not in all areas. Looking at yourself you felt like your body wasn’t well proportioned. Hips, ass, belly, arms to large completed with micro-tits. It never really bothered you before but, in that moment, and in that lingerie set, it did.

“Are you ok?”, you hear your boyfriend’s voice, his worried features looking at you from the door. You blinked several times, trying to make the incoming tears vanish. “Yep”, you lie and he knows it. Positioning himself behind you, his arms sliding around your waist and his chin resting on your shoulder, he fixes his eyes on yours. “You’re a terrible liar. Come on, tell me why my gorgeous lady is on the verge of tears while looking this hot?” You clean the falling tear from your face and feel his grip on you tightening. “I… It’s nothing, it’s stupid”, you say and try to disengage from his hold but he’s not having it. “If it leaves you in this state, then it’s not nothing. Please talk to me. I know I’m not always around but I’m here for you, no matter what.”

You sigh and finally have the courage to look at him in the eyes. “I look dumb. In this set. Some areas are too big and others barely non-existent”, you confess. He frowns but doesn’t dismiss your feelings. He doesn’t say anything, showing you his complete attention. “I mean, wouldn’t I look better with bigger breasts? Because, like breasts are supposed to be ‘THE’ feminine attribute and I don’t have it. I don’t like it”, you ramble until the room stays quiet. He slowly turns you to face him, lifting your chin up. “You want the truth?”, he asks to which you nod. “First, I don’t think you look dumb at all. I think you look hot ass fuck and I’ve got a long and thick muscle that agrees with me.” His statement makes you chuckle and he smiles. “Second, I love your small cute breasts and besides I’m an ass man and querida you are serving”, he whispers closely to your ear, his hands sliding down and squeezing your behind. You feel the atmosphere change in the room, heat invading your body. “Angel”, you moan while his lips kiss your neck. “Third, who said that breasts are the feminine attribute. That’s bullshit.”

He grabs your face and makes sure you’re looking at him, the intensity in his eyes showing you how serious he is. “And finally, the things you’re looking at and feeling insecure about, are the things that make you unique. Choosing me to share your uniqueness with, makes me the luckiest and proudest motherfucker in the world. I love everything about you and so much more.” Your breath gets stuck in your throat, his declaration giving you chills and burn your heart. “You’re wrong about one thing. I’m the luckiest. Hor having you”, you exclaim before capturing his lips in a passionate kiss. Touching every parcel of your skin, he walks you to the edge of the bed and lays you on it, crawling in between your spread legs. Instantly, his mouth is on you, kissing your chest, biting and licking on your collarbones, groaning when feeling your knee rub against his hard and eager member. He slides the bra’s straps down, freeing your breasts from their confines. He makes eye contact while his tongue slowly circles around your already hardened nipples, making you arch your back and moan. He keeps his ministration, while his other hand, slides down your body and circles your clit. “An—g—el, please”, you plead him.

He lifts himself up and discharges his shirt, while you unbuckle his pants as fast as your trembling fingers can. He kisses your body down again but this time with compliments attached to his mouth while doing so. “I need you baby, please”, you moan and hope he’ll get the clue. He chuckles before his arms grab your waist and reverse the position, leaving you on top of him. You grind on his cock, creating some friction before leaning and licking the vein on the side. Angel’s body shivers from your tongue, his cursing and moaning being heard in the room. Slipping his hand around your hair, he lifts you up and tells you to ride him. You position him right under your entrance before sliding down and gasp in unison. Your hips quickly find their rhythm, his hands on your ass, pressing you down with each thrust. “Like that Y/N. So beautiful, so good”, he moans and lifts himself up in a sitting position, making him go deeper inside you. He thrusts up meeting you, your mouths on each other. The moment not only erotic but passionate and true. “I’m close”, you whisper in his ear. “Let go, I’m here, right behind you”, he moans and you do. You let yourself go, your orgasm provoking his, your bodies pressed insanely close, molding like marble sculptures.

“Te queiro mucho, mi amor”, he hears you say before falling asleep a few minutes later. “I love you too, future Mrs. Reyes”, he replies with a kiss on your forehead.

*gif, credit to the owner*

PERMANENT TAG LIST : @arrowswithwifi @poetic-pixie @theshortegg @kyber-hearts-and-stardust-souls @prettybubblesintheair @yafriendlyfangirl @marshmallow-witch @ms-cellanies @the-feckless-wonder @cfisher290 @thefangirltheycallviolet @river-fics @lilulo-12 @fanfictionrecommendations-com @spetzerfehn @angieptt @wayward-timetravel-collecter​ @ashley17jacobs @lokithedancingqueen @wildsoul1221 @introvertedsin @robertconradjr​ @francezka10  @titty-teetee @breezy1415 @nerdypinupcrystal @hhiggs​ 

[cosmiccandydreamer]

Insecure chapter 3

Otis driftwood x Reader

( I do not own these gifs)

Masterlist is here. Please see warnings ⚠️

The next day the eve before Halloween, you were at work; you worked about one or two days a week at Captain's Spalding's gas station and chicken roadside attraction. Spalding had become a father figure to you in the years you've known the family. He knew your father too briefly when home; this is where your dad would always fill up his truck before leaving again. You'd still hang out in the shop with your dad while he chatted or killed time. He knew you were a good kid; that’s why when he found out you were dating his adopted son Otis he was overjoyed. You would help him outrunning the register while he would make fried chicken in the back. It was a fun environment, you talking with Spaulding for hours and laughing until your sides hurt. So that night, you're sweeping the gas station/ art exhibit while admiring Otis's art around the place. It filled you with pride that your guy was so talented and creative. 

The shop bell rang, and in walked two young men who were not from around here. You listened in on their; conversation, and apparently, these groups of young people were on the road in hopes of writing a book on offbeat roadside attractions. You watched and held in a laugh from behind one of the shelves as Spaulding messed with one of the young men you learned was named Bill; he always liked to press people's buttons, and this time was no separate thing." oh, I'm just messing with ya son! Look take a load off. I’ll have y/n get ya some refreshments or something. At the same time, I set up the ride y/n Darlin c'mere would ya" you set down the broom. You walked over to the men, your boots clacking on the wooden floor. " Evening gents, I'm y/n does anyone want any water, sprite … burdon?" 

You chucked a bit, which seemed to loosen the guys up; you learned the other was named jerry. " Oh, we're good; we’re just gonna go get our friends who are out in the car. I'll be back" as Jerry leaves, you turn your attention to Bill, you lean slightly against the counter "so roadside attractions, huh? Seems interesting" "Yeah! It's been pretty cool so far being to a lot of interesting places," you noticed Bill was giving off some you assumed to be nervous body language, I mean, you couldn't blame him; this was placed in the middle of nowhere with a loud clown gas station owner. " Is Spaulding making you nervous? He's a lot, but I wear he's just a pussycat he won't hurt ya ``'' oh no no he's fine it's just been a long drive, so how long have you been working here you like it ?" Bill asked while seemingly eyeing you up and down " I like it's it's.." your conversation was cut short by the two women coming inside. They seem to turn their nose up at the place before setting their sights on you with an unimpressed expression, sigh, so it was these types of girls. " Evening ladies! Can I get you anything? We have " " Jerry Bill, when are we going to leave? We don't want to go on this stupid ride," the one you later learned was named Mary said. You took this opportunity to walk away, passing Spaulding toward the backroom; he winked at you as he passed, " everyone ready for the ride; let’s go, people ''.

Afterward, you got your coat and waited for Baby; usually, Otis picked you up from work when you worked nights at the gas station and call him old-fashioned. Still, the idea of you driving alone didn't sit right with him. But this was different; you insisted o. Still, the picking you up because 1. She was already heading into town to get people from red hot pussy liquors, and 2. You knew Otis wanted to work on his art and let off some steam with the cheerleaders there 3. You suddenly saw your guests for the evening event tomorrow. While the group was on the ride, you decided to call the house and inform Baby of the plan. While the guests loaded up into the ride, you pulled Spaulding aside and informed him of what you planned to do. He smiled wide and said, " this is why you're one of our kiddos.” Baby agreed to have you drop her off on the road toward the path of the tree and instructed Rufus to blow out the tires while you went along to the house. 

Everything went off without a hitch. As everyone sat down for dinner, you hurried down the stairs from freshening up in the bathroom; you eyed Otis sitting at the front of the table, god he was so handsome, and you were so in love. You walked over to him when you heard your name "y/n wow hey!! You live here what a small world" you turned to see Bill smiling at you, " oh hey Bill! What a small world indeed" you turned back to Otis ``honey you want a beer?", Otis didn't answer at first; instead he looked back and forth to Bill and you, eyes shifting ever so slightly, he cleared his throat " yeah sure Darlin I'd love one" as you passed him he grabbed your belt hook and pulled your toward him, " give me some sugar first" you happily obliged leaning down to give him a soft kiss on the lips. He kissed you back, never taking his eyes off Bill, who awkwardly looked away from the scene. 

You came back with a beer for Otis and went to take a seat next to him; he instead pulled you down into his lap. You quickly got comfortable not minding the PDA at all; this was your family; they were used to this kind of affection between you both. You looked over to Denise's ring on her hand; it was beautiful, a ruby, you thought. " Wow, that is a gorgeous ring! Is that a ruby" you leaned forward a bit to get a better look, to which Denise pulled her hand away and set her hand on her lap. " Um yeah, it is, and it's a real Ruby too it's from Jerry '' she looked over to him "wow, that was a nice gift," you said " yeah, well I deserve it," Denise replied. " You want a ruby someday y/n? '' Otis asked, causing you to turn back to look at him " I'll get you one day if you want,” “ I wouldn't say no to a ruby someday,” you replied. The rest of the night went on as planned; the group was tied up and used for the family's party favors. 

As the night winded down, you stood out in the backyard smoking; the house had been pretty humid with the rain and hot air; it was a nice stillness standing under the porch watching the rain. " There you are the fuck you doing out here, shoulda told me you were going for a smoke" Otis appeared behind you, standing in the doorway biting his lower lip. "Sorry handsome, you looked so focused and didn't wanna intrude on the art project" he sat down next to you on the porch bench as you passed him the joint. " This was a good day, '' you told him, leaning Into him as he put his arm around you. " Yeah, it was huh," he takes a long drag of the joint and slowly blow it out, " you think you could see yourself doing this forever?" " Doing what? smoking in the rain, yeah, of course ``'' I mean spending your days doing fucked up shit with me"  you take the joint back, also taking a long drag, " nowhere else I would rather be ''.

 He removed his arm from behind you and turns to face you. "I've been thinking," he scratches his face and looks down at his hand all stained with blood, " I know I ain't the most attentive or expressive kinda guy. I'm not good with the mushy shit," you start to protest. He puts his hand up " let me finish like I was saying I ain't good at the mushy shit or telling you how I feel. I know I can be a pain in the fucking ass to deal with, but you are the greatest thing I've ever come across." He looks at you fully this time with sincerity and vulnerability you've never seen; it was rare to see this much from Otis, usually only showing you got some pieces of his soft side when you two were alone. 

You didn't Dare move or speak after that. It was almost like you were seeing a baby deer in front of you. You didn't want to spook him, the forgotten joint just burning between your fingertips." For one, you're as sharp as a tack; I can't talk to anyone else about what I can talk to you about. You're patient with the fact I'm a grumpy asshole; you like my huge art; most people can't stand to look at it, but you not only encouraged me to do it, you offer to help. You're loyal and don't ever show signs of hightailing it no matter what you see here. You're funny; you got some comebacks that I never thought would come out of Lil ol, you mamas, and you're sexy as fuck like God damn, I saw the way Bill what's his face was looking at you, and I don't blame him. I don't even know what I did to have you. I mean, look at me, I look like shit," he chuckles; you still hadn’t moved from when he began talking. " I guess what I'm saying is I know I have made you feel insecure this past; weeks, but like I'm sorry ok, and I don't want you to ever doubt how I feel about cha" he then reaches into his pocket and pulls out the ruby ring.. "so I was wondering" " oh my god! " This pulled you out of your trance. “ Are you... I what are you" " hey, can you shut up and let me finish?" " Sorry, sorry," he starts again, " I want you to know I'm in this for the long haul your mine forever, alright? So you ok with that or no?" " You nodded a huge clumsy nod feeling the tears start to form in your eyes, " I'ma need a verbal yes or no here you are crying doesn't tell me shit" " yes a thousand times yes" he slipped the ring on your finger which shockingly was a perfect fit, you jumped onto his lap and straddled him linking your hands around his neck into his long hair, he rested his hands under your butt gripping them, " I'm your forever Mr. Driftwood." 

You both sat this way for a while, just taking in each other's smells and listening to each other's heartbeat; the only sound to be heard was the falling rain. "Otis?" "Hmm," he hummed, buried in your neck, nuzzling. " Can I help today?" You usually helped with the artistic side of the whole ordeal, helping him assemble, get supplies, clean the bodies. Still, you never joined in on the actual killing despite all the time you've been here, but something about today seemed like the right time to jump in. How eyes shot open, and he looked up at you with a wild surprised, yet aroused look, " you sure sugar? You don't have to know, but God damn, it's so sexy to hear you say that '' he gripped his hold on your waist, leaning forward, and kissed you slowly yet profoundly, sliding his tongue into your mouth. You moaned into his mouth, tightening the handle on his neck; you pulled back, gasping for air " yeah, I'm sure I wanna do this with you" " shit mamas, let's go then HELL YEAH'' he hoisted you up bridal style and carried you into the house down to the basement. 

[inevitably-johnlocked]

Hi Steph! How you’re doing? First of all, I wanna say that I love your lists. So, I was wondering, do you have some long Johnlock fics? Like, with a bunch of chapters and all that. Thank you!

Hey Nonny!! 

I absolutely do! And you know what?? I’m gonna be selfish: No one has ever EVER asked me for my shorter long fics, so I’m going to take this opportunity to finally release this list, because it’s been sitting in my drafts for YEARS lol. BUT you can check the list below for the links to all my longer-fics lists! Happy reading!!

NOVELLA LENGTH FICS: 20-25K

See also:

Novella Length Fics: 25 to 50K (Aug. 2019)

Novel Length Fics: 50 to 100K (Nov. 2018)

Novel Length Fics: 50 to 100K Pt 2 (May 2020)

Novel Length Fics: 100K+ w. (May 2019)

Novel Length Fics: 100K+ w. Pt 2 (Aug 2020)

Through the Clouds by Mazarin221b (E, 20,004 w., 6 Ch. || Retirement, Home Improvement, First Time, Romance) – Sherlock takes a remarkably early retirement at 47, and convinces John that a change of pace would do them both good. They buy an old cottage on the South Downs, and exchange their nonstop life in Baker Street for quiet contemplation, bee studies, and book writing. They might go completely insane, but sometimes it takes stepping outside of the life you're living to find the life you want. Part 1 of Through The Clouds

A Life Well-Lived by Kate_Lear (E, 20,121 w., 1 Ch. || Original Male Character, Sherlock Woos John, Jealous Sherlock, Reluctant Bi-John, Past Abuse, Insecure John, Reassuring / Caring Sherlock, Protective Sherlock, Understanding Sherlock) – John got scared off men by an abusive past relationship. Sherlock has to try and woo him while not scaring him off with protective possessive rage.

The White Lotuses by SilentAuror (E, 20,340 w., 1 Ch. || Slow Burn, Domestic, Romance) – One day John realises that he just isn't where he belongs, which is back at Baker Street with Sherlock. So he goes back and Sherlock, in his own way, courts him. Romance.

Out of the Woods by SilentAuror (E, 20,471 w., 1 Ch. || Post S4, Romance, Slow Burn, Flirting, Drunk Sex, Practical Jokes, POV Sherlock, Bottomlock, Possessive John, Pining Sherlock, Frustrated Wanking, Frottage, Hand Jobs, Blow Jobs, First Kiss/Time, Virgin Sherlock, Love Confessions, Soft Sherlock, Dancing, Bum Appreciation, Hanging out with the Yard) – Sherlock is fairly certain that John has taken to flirting with him of late, but can't be entirely certain of it. At least, not until a case takes them into a forest, along with Lestrade's team and something happens that will change everything about their lives...

You're On the Air by prettysailorsoldier (M, 20,616 w., 1 Ch. || Unilock, Matchmaking, Radio, Christmas, Christmas Fluff, First Kiss, Friends to Lovers, Sherlock POV, Pining Sherlock, Flirting, Bisexual John) – The Consulting Detective and The Woman dominate the airwaves of their university radio station, doling out advice on everything from meeting the parents to sexual positions. When their ratings start to dip before the holidays, however, manager Mike thinks it's time for some fresh blood, and who better to fill in the gaps than rugby captain--and notorious flirt--John Watson? Part 1 of 25 Days of Johnlock

whiskies neat by Ellipsical (E, 20,660 w., 15 Ch. || Alternate First Meeting, POV Second Person Sherlock, Slow Burn, One Night Stand, Rimming, Blow Jobs, Anal, Soldier John, Crying, Emotional Lovemaking, Switchlock) – Home and hearth and whiskies neat, or, alternatively, Sherlock Holmes falls in love.

Achieving the Together-Coloured Instant by teahigh (E, 20,776 w., 1 Ch. || Est. Rel, PTSD, Codependency, Fluff & Angst, H/C, Smut, Demisexual Sherlock, Experiments) – John wonders if this is how it’s going to be: A life speaking in code, because they’re both too stupid to figure out how to say, “I love you.”

Winter's Delights by Kate_Lear (E, 21,173 w., 1 Ch. || Holmes Family, Christmas, Fake Relationship, Friends to Lovers, Bed Sharing, Domestics) – Sherlock takes John home for Christmas to meet the extended Holmes family. Part 1 of Winter's Delights

Once More, With Feeling by cellard00rs (T, 21,178 w., 7 Ch. || John’s Family, Fake Relationship, Romance, Fluff, Humour) – To put off his meddlesome, matchmaking mother, John convinces Sherlock to play the role of his significant other. Unparalleled awkwardness ensues.

Love Is by SilentAuror (E, 21,508 w., 1 Ch. || Angst, UST / URT, Post HLV, Romance) – At Mrs Hudson's urging, Sherlock finally decides to tell John how he feels about him. Part 1 of Love Is

echoes through time by chellefic (E, 21,619 w. || First Time, Romance, ACD & BBC, Epistolary) – Mummy sends a trunk from the Holmes cottage in Sussex to 221B. Its contents alter the way John and Sherlock see themselves and one another.

The Real Meaning of Idioms by feverishsea (T, 21,691 w., 1 Ch. || Texting, Humour, Post S2) - After two weeks away, John finally texts Sherlock. He doesn’t expect Sherlock to respond. He doesn’t expect Sherlock to keep texting him. And he really doesn’t expect things to spiral out of control so rapidly.

5 Times John Got the Girl (and lost her) and 1 Time John Got the Guy (and kept him) by LiviKate (M, 21,695 w., 6 Ch. || 5 and Ones, Kissing, Oblivious / Awkward Sherlock, BAMF / Sexy / Stud John, Embarassed John, John’s Scar, Hurt/Comfort, Jealous Sherlock) – John has always had good luck with the ladies. He's charming, friendly and funny, not to mention great in bed. However, his usual skill with the opposite sex is constantly being thwarted by Sherlock and his outbursts. How will John ever get a leg over when Sherlock is always cockblocking him?

Brief Conversations with the Woman by May_Shepard (E, 21,906 w., 20 Ch. || Pining, Love Fairy Irene, Filler Fic, UST/URT, Drug Use, Clueless Sherlock, Relationship Advice, Angst w/ Happy Ending) – Sherlock has a puzzle to solve, and his name is John Watson.

When to Let Go by KendylGirl (M, 22,109 w., 8 Ch. || Friends to Lovers, Reverse Reichenbach, Sacrifice, Forgiveness, Angst, Love, Implied Drug Use) – What if it were John who had to die to thwart Moriarty's plans? John's supposed death shatters Sherlock, and when he returns, it will challenge the pair to forge a path of forgiveness, to peace, and to find a way back to each other. Part 1 of When to Let Go

A Shipless Ocean by myswordfishmind (M, 22,135 w. 4 Ch. || Post-TRF, John has a Kid) – Ten years after the fall Sherlock goes back to London to find that John no longer lives there. Instead, he resides in a seaside town, a widower, and the father of a seven year old son. Now, Sherlock must struggle with the fact that there may no longer be a place for him in this new world.

Ghost Stories by SwissMiss (M, 22,256 w., 1 Ch. || Pining, Holmes Family, Christmas, Friends to Lovers, Slow Burn, Bed Sharing, Fluff, Hurt/Comfort, First Time) – Sherlock's parents think he and John are a couple. They might be onto something.

The One With the Proposal by kim47 (E, 22,375 w., 3 Ch. || Fluff, Romance, Marriage Proposal) – Proposing shouldn't be this difficult.

Sonatina in G Minor by SilentAuror (E, 22,574 w., 1 Ch. || Case Fic, POV Sherlock, Angst, UST, Sherlock’s Violin, Post-S3, Romance) – John has come back to Baker Street, but Sherlock doesn't understand the strange tension between them, even after he begins teaching John to play the violin at John's request.

Dear John by wendymarlowe (E, 23,031 w., 64 Ch. || Post-TRF, Online Dating, Pining, Epistolary, Cybersex, Long Distance Romance) – With Sherlock dead, John eventually (under duress) makes a profile on an online dating site. And falls into a long-distance relationship with an enigmatic partner who reminds him of Sherlock in all the right ways. (Hint: it turns out to be Sherlock.) Part 1 of Dear John

Knotted by naughtyspirit (E, 23,166 w., 4 Ch. || UST/URT, Cuddling, Sharing Body Heat, Confessions, Kissing, Mastrubation, Frustration, BAMF!John) – John has to cancel a date because of Sherlock's case, which leads them to be tied up in a basement from which they have to escape. They get wet, get tied up close and John has to step up and save them. Because he's pretty. And hot. And just a little bit of a BAMF.

You Can Imagine the Christmas Dinners by ardenteurophile (T, 23,584 w., 9 Ch. || Pre-Slash, Drama, Fluff & Angst, Humour, Romance) – Sherlock takes John along for Christmas dinner with Mycroft and Mummy (And "Anthea", too). Over the course of the evening, John realises that everyone in the room - apart from him - seems to think that he and Sherlock are a couple. Part 2 of Xmas Dinners Verse

Once Upon a Beast Becoming by antietamfalls (T, 24,042 w., 6 Ch. || Beauty and the Beast AU || Magical Realism, Folklore, Celtic Mythology) – An act of pride, a druid’s curse, an enchanted leaf; Sherlock’s torment has lasted an age. Hope arrives in the form of one John Watson, a man uniquely suited to break the spell. But with a single night to win his affections, Sherlock finds his carefully laid plans disrupted by a monstrous killer whose sights are set on the only thing he has left to lose: John.

The Kepler Problem by kinklock (E, 24,270 w., 1 Ch. || Sci-Fi AU, Alien Sherlock, Space Repairman John, Alien Biology, Horny John) – Working in uncharted space exploration was not as exciting as John had hoped, especially when it turned out to be mostly bot maintenance on uninhabited planets. However, the mystery of the repeated, unexplained malfunctions on planet BAK 2212 might turn out to be exactly the kind of adventure he'd been craving.

Maintaining A Personal Life by Gingerhermit (E, 24,284 w., 6 Ch. || Alternating POV’s, Bisexuality, BAMF!John, Jealous Sherlock, Romance / Drama, Sort-of Case Fic, Peril & Angst, Love Confessions, Toplock, Soft Idiots in Love, Post S3) – Sherlock and John discover some interesting revelations about each other’s sexuality, which lead them both to question the assumptions they've made about one another for years. In the midst of their mutual discoveries, a dangerous psychopath looms on the side-lines who threatens to destroy their new beginning.

The Sexual Awakening of Sherlock Holmes and Dr. John Watson by suitesamba (M, 24,579 w., 10 Ch. || Post-TRF, Case Fic, H/C, First Kiss/Time) – Sherlock owes Mycroft a favor. Mycroft calls in that favor by offering Sherlock's consulting services in a charity auction. Sherlock and John soon find themselves at the country manor of Mrs. Ives-Patton Smarmington III - not very coincidentally a long-time friend of Sherlock's mother - where they are reluctant participants in her Murder Mystery Weekend. It's a play within a play for Sherlock and John, and their roles for the weekend event bleed over into their real lives, waking the sleeping dragons within.

Tomorrow's Song by agirlsname (M, 24,645 w., 5 Ch. || Post-TRF, POV Sherlock, Angst with a Happy Ending, Virgin / Repressed Sherlock, Love Confessions, Slow Burn, Pining, Jealous Sherlock) – How can he think a relationship with me would be a good idea? I am the sort of person to take a break from my life and when I come back after two years, I expect to find it exactly as I left it. In reality I find it shattered to pieces. (I actually equate you with my life. When did I start doing that?)

State of Flux by Atiki (E, 24,655 w., 4 Ch. || Sherlock POV, Slow Burn, First Kiss/Time, Friends to Lovers, Frottage, Cuddles and Snuggles, Awkwardness, Insecure/Virgin Sherlock, Romance) – John’s marriage is over and he is finally back home (i.e. at Baker Street, where he belongs). Sherlock is awfully insecure and John is awfully hesitant, and they're both awkward idiots, of course, but they figure it out. Many First Times happen.

[saeyoungs-sunflower]

Hello!! I like your hc so much! So i was wondering can i request the rfa+v, and saeran with an mc who is really insecure with her body so she starve herself on accident? If you’re not comfortable than you don’t have to!! Thank you tho :)

Hey there! Thank you so much, I’m glad you enjoy them😊I hope it’s okay but I mainly left out the eating part/made it brief. I’m really sorry, it’s just a bit of a delicate topic for me to write about but I really hope it’s still okay for you.

Just a reminder that it’s okay to feel insecure, but remember that you are not defined by your insecurities. I also don’t believe that there is one definition of beautiful, nor do I believe that thinking you are beautiful is vain or arrogant. Please be kind to yourselves, and if you are going through a rough patch with your body image or self-love, then I sincerely hope this can be a comfort for you and, if you can, I encourage you to reach out to someone or talk to a professional. My DMs are always open, if you ever need a chat or to rant then I’m here to listen. You are welcome and loved here💛

***

RFA with an insecure MC

Zen:

❤︎ now, if you’ve done his route, then you know that this man understands

❤︎ and we also know that his looks are very important to him, so he completely acknowledges your feelings and in no way invalidates them

❤︎ but that being said, this man worships your body

❤︎ if you guys weren’t together he would be the best wing man because he LOVES to praise you and lift you up, even if you aren’t feeling particularly insecure

❤︎ you got a new outfit? “YES GIRL YOU WORK IT” you do your makeup different? “YOU ARE SO TALENTED AND ARTISTIC YES” you’re in your sweats and your hair’s a mess you feel totally gross? “THAT’S MY GIRL RIGHT THERE WOW YOU ARE GLORIOUS”

❤︎ he’s very vocal about his love for you and his love for your body

❤︎ sometimes it can be a bit embarrassing and usually comments on your appearance can make you feel uncomfortable/self-conscious, but for some reason when he does it it gives you a lil confidence boost <3

❤︎ we’re no stranger to the fact that he is hot as fuck

❤︎ honestly makes a little mad like who gave you the audacity to look like that hMMM?

❤︎ so when you first started going out, your confidence plummeted

❤︎ and it didn’t help that, whilst the majority of his fans loved you and loved the relationship, there were a few that really got to you

❤︎ they would post some not very nice comments about you on the forum

❤︎ they were just jealous fanatics, but you didn’t know that and took what they said to heart

❤︎ you started working out a lot after that, probably a bit too much

❤︎ Zen picked up on this, and he was all for exercising with you but bbygirl you’re over doing it and you really don’t seem to be enjoying it

❤︎ so he decides to teach you how to dance!!!!

❤︎ that way, you still get the endorphins from exercise, but you also learn a great skill which gives you loads of confidence because guess what!!! you’re a natural and you look gorgeous when you dance!!!!

❤︎ teaches you that working out doesn’t necessarily need to be done for aesthetic purposes, and you can have loads of fun with your boo whilst you do it!

Yoosung:

★ bit like Zen, he kinda understands how you feel

★ he often expressed it in the chatroom that he was jealous of Zen’s looks, so I think this boy is also a little insecure

★ poor lil chicken nugget you’re beautiful too

★ but when you chose him over Zen?? oh boy the confidence boost

★ it was then that he got to appreciate that his looks didn’t mean everything, and he was grateful that he got to learn that from you

★ so when he found out you were insecure, it made him sad because??? you’re literally perfect????

★ he noticed that you were always second guessing yourself

★ you would always try on and so many outfits/do your hair over and over until giving up and throwing on whatever, but you always looked so defeated

★ he made a note from then on to always show you off to his friends like yeah bitch this is my hot ass girlfriend who also happens to be the most amazing person on earth what about it?

★ his social media is flooded with candid photos of you and the captions were always about how beautiful you were and how lucky he was to have you

★ however, he was still a little suspicious about your insecurities

★ when you were together and he asked if you want to grab something to eat, you had always “already eaten”, which started to seem unlikely especially in some situations

★ so whenever you came over, he would cook you SUPER delicious food

★ this boy is a cooking GOD

★ he also tried to make sure they were fairly healthy and balanced meals so you wouldn’t feel guilty about eating

★ little by little, your relationship with food became healthier once you discovered how good it could be when you cook properly

★ but also insecurities and bad eating habits don’t go away over night

★ so he always leaves post-it notes around reminding you to eat and take care of yourself, and also one’s that tell you how much he cares and loves everything about you

★ he’s so damn cute somebody hold me

Jaehee:

☞ GIRL SAME

☞ i know i’m repeating myself but this lady gets you

☞ we know that when she started working for Jumin, he made her cut her hair and wear fake glasses, and even though she looked HOT AS HELL (yes baehee work it) she just felt wrong and uncomfortable about her appearance

☞ so she could pick up on the fact that you were insecure from the get go

☞ she noticed how you would shy away from pictures, and you always wore clothes that would hide your body

☞ well that just won’t do

☞ something must be done

☞ you wILL FEEL THE LOVE MC YOU WILL

☞ organises a shopping trip for you to try on some hella cool outfits

☞ invites Zen along because, as stated above, he is very vocal with his praise and is just really good at hyping you up

☞ pretty sure everyone in the shop hates you because Jaehee and Zen do not hold back whenever you come out of the changing room lmao

☞ you may have been kicked out of one shop but let’s not worry about that

☞ you came home with some pretty fire outfits that were really flattering on you and just made you feel great ya know?

☞ Jaehee is usually pretty shy when asking you personal questions

☞ but she wants to help you, so one night over dinner she manages to get you to open up to her

☞ and man Jaehee is a good listener

☞ as a woman, i feel like she is able to understand where you’re coming from more than any of the others, so you’re in good hands :)

Jumin:

♚ this man…

♚ he just doesn’t get it i’m so sorry

♚ it’s not that he doesn’t care about your insecurities or thinks you are ridiculous for feeling that way, not at all actually

♚ looks were just never something he really thought about it in general

♚ he knew he was ‘good-looking’ and he knew what was considered ‘good-looking’, he just never cared about it much

♚ at first he was just like??? but you’re literally MC??? what is there to be insecure about???

♚ you had done pretty well at hiding your insecurities at the beginning of your relationship

♚ which was helped by the fact that Jumin would never assume that you had anything to dislike about yourself, so he never looked out for/noticed the signs

♚ it took a whole year guys damn

♚ it had been a year since you got together, so he wanted to take you out for a lovely meal

♚ but he also bought you a beautiful dress

♚ haha…

♚ this was where it went tits up lmao

♚ you were so grateful for it, it was a really stunning dress and you were actually pretty excited to try it on

♚ and so was he hehehe

♚ but when you came out of the bathroom and looked at yourself in the mirror, he noticed that your eyes were welling up and boi your face did not look happy

♚ Jumin’s like: ??????

♚ Jumin.exe has stopped working

♚ instantly takes you in his arms, shushing and cooing you as he rubbed your back

♚ “My love, what is it?”

♚ after a few sniffles, you knew you just had be honest with him

♚ “I’m sorry, Jumin. It’s the most beautiful dress I’ve ever seen but I just ruin it…it belongs on someone else, not on me.”

♚ holds you so much tighter and even starts to feel tears prick his own eyes

♚ he takes a different approach to compliments

♚ he finds a way to compliment your appearance without sounding superficial or fake

♚ instead of “you’re beautiful”, he goes for “your smile lights up the room” or “you carry so much warmth and kindness in your eyes”

♚ it’s his way of letting you know that he thinks you’re the most gorgeous thing to walk the planet, but while also telling you that you are so much more than what you look like

Saeyoung:

☀︎ hoo hoo boiiiiii

☀︎ i’m just gonna cut to the chase

☀︎ he found out during some ~sexy times~

☀︎ i’m not going into graphic detail it’s not that kind of post ;)

☀︎ things were getting hella heated like damn

☀︎ so he started to ya know like…unbutton your shirt

☀︎ why am i actually getting embarrassed while writing this i need to get a grip

☀︎ spot the virgin lmfao

☀︎ but then you stopped him and he’s like P A N I C

☀︎ terrified that he crossed a line bby chill for a sec

☀︎ but then you ask if you could turn off the light and he starts to suspect that you don’t want him to see your body

☀︎ he’s so gentle about the topic it’s very sweet

☀︎ he wants you to know that he loves every fibre of your being, but he also doesn’t want to push you if you’re uncomfortable

☀︎ “MC, I adore every part of you, including your body. If you want me to turn off the light I absolutely will, but if you let me, I want to show you just how much you mean to me.”

☀︎ you hesitated, but eventually agreed to leave the light on

☀︎ and JESUS CHRIST HE DID NOT DISAPPOINT

☀︎ Saeyoung has an incredible attention to detail, as well as patience

☀︎ and he took his sweet time with you lemme tell ya

☀︎ you’re pretty sure he kissed every inch on your body whilst also whispering his praise as he did so

☀︎ he honestly made you feel like a Goddess

☀︎ everything he said was sincere and he just treated you with so much care and love and that shit is contagious

☀︎ ever since then, he was more physically affectionate with you until eventually you didn’t even think twice when undressing in front of him

☀︎ hello yes i would like to order one Saeyoung pls thank you

☀︎ actual love of my life

V / Jihyun:

❁ he asked you to be his model for one of his paintings

❁ and you were like ummmm……okay maybe it won’t be too bad????

❁ but this man has no chill

❁ he wanted you to be semi-nude and you were like h e l l  n o

❁ he was also Confused™

❁ you tried to make up some excuse but it was hopeless

❁ so you just told him that being nude in front of him was already difficult for you, but for you body to be on display for others to see was just too much

❁ this sweet man

❁ his heart broke

❁ it hurt him so much to know that someone with such a kind soul ever doubted her worth, especially because of something like your looks

❁ you were absolutely stunning to him, but he wanted you to believe that yourself

❁ he made a deal with you that if you modelled for him and were still uncomfortable with the outcome, then it would only ever be seen by you two

❁ you reluctantly agreed, and he made it his mission to make you see yourself through his eyes

❁ it took him a while to complete, but when he did oh man

❁ you full on started sobbing

❁ OH SHIT HE MADE MC CRY PANIC PANIC

❁ someone help this man

❁ you managed to tell him that you weren’t crying because you were upset, but because you never thought that you would ever see yourself as beautiful

❁ but the way he painted you GOOD G R I E F

❁ he made you look ethereal, and you couldn’t believe that this was how he saw you

❁ you didn’t even focus on the parts of you that you would usually hate because he made them look so heavenly and like,,,they belonged there???

❁ “Jihyun, you made me look so lovely.”

❁ “No, my love, that’s just what I saw. Everything you see here is you, nothing else.”

❁ okay great he made you cry even more goOD jOb jIhYuN

Saeran:

☽ ha ha ha ha ha

☽ you thought Jumin was bad?? oh i am so sorry my guy

☽ he just has no clue

☽ “What do you mean? Why do you care about how you look? You’re not ugly or anything.”

☽ gee thank you Saeran

☽ but also you are not helping in the slightest

☽ he’s REALLY not good at expressing his affection okay pls give him a break

☽ but he’s not heartless come on now

☽ it took him a while to fully understand where you were coming from, and even then he struggled to find a way to help

☽ Saeran is a very quiet supporter

☽ it’s hard to spot to the naked eye, but you know when Saeran cares for you because you feel it

☽ the first thing he notices is your body language

☽ and since he doesn’t really know what to do, he kinda just...adjusts you

☽ for example, if he sees that your body language is very closed off, almost like your trying to hide your body, he’ll silently move your shoulders and fix your posture so you are more open

☽ and if he sees you bow your head or try to block your face, he’ll silently lift your chin up

☽ but the most important part is that when he does this, he always smiles at you

☽ now Saeran is very careful with expressing his emotions. so when he does show his feelings, you know he means it

☽ so you started to hold yourself with more certainty and confidence, because it made him smile to see you not hiding away

☽ ‘fake it til you make it’ is a very real thing, and eventually it became natural to embrace every part of you

☽ when he became more comfortable, he told you that he was proud of how far you’d come and how he loved to see you feel good in your own skin

***

Thank you anon for the request, I hope you’re doing okay. Once again, anyone is welcome to message me if you’re struggling and need a friend to talk to <3 x

[confused-stars]

hawksweek2020 - Day 5: Insecurities

@hawksweek2020

__

Pretty Bird

(or: someone just give him a hug please im begging you)

It had been eight months since the Winged Hero Hawks had made his debut. The spotlights hadn’t let up since then, and he hadn’t stopped moving.

At his first hero ranking, he’d already made the top twenty, popularity polls adding a huge bonus to the sheer number of successful rescues he’d already pulled off with seeming ease. And it was easy, to him. Saving people came as naturally as breathing after all the training he’d gone through.

 Charming the masses? That was also easy. A smile that was just smug enough to make him interesting, and just warm enough to have people believe he was genuine. Words that sounded a little too blunt but were carefully picked and made the public love him for his honesty. A wink thrown in at the right time, a strategic placement of his wings in front of the cameras. All of that had been training.

 This was just another one of those things, another side of hero work that he hadn’t experienced before but should have been fine with.

He should have.

So why exactly did he find himself hiding away in a storage closet?

Well.

Fuck.

Keigo pulled his wings tighter around himself and tried to count to ten under his breath. He got to seven before there was a knock on the door.

 “Kid?”

Ah, shit. They knew where he was.

Of course he was already going to have to answer for running out and messing up the schedule the way he had, and he didn’t even know how long he’d been here, but he still didn’t want to be talked to.

 “Go ‘way!” he called back, and his voice sounded way too shaky and not enough like his hero persona at all. “I’m fine! I just need a minute!”

 A pause. “… Hawks.” The voice was softer now. He knew he’d heard it before, but his panicked mind wasn’t supplying him with anything. “Can I come in if I close the door behind me?”

 Keigo furrowed his brows. Why would she do that? Wasn’t she here to drag him back out? But saying no would probably make them break down the door or something. He twisted the feather he’d kept stuck in the lock around until he felt it click open.

 He straightened up where he was sitting in between a bunch of nondescript storage crates and cleaning supplies, his wings folded neatly against his back even though he just wanted to curl them around his body again.

 The door opened a moment later, and Keigo could have slapped himself for not recognizing Midnight’s voice when she’d been outside the door.

She must have had a photoshoot here today, too. He vaguely remembered that this was supposed to be the place where she most often did her modelling work. She was in her hero costume, though lacking her usual accessories, and she was holding the shirt that he’d left when he’d hurried out of the studio.

 He caught it when she tossed it at him and freed his wings of feathers for a moment so he could pull it on, slotting them back in place after.

“… thanks.” He flashed Midnight one of his trademark smiles, and from her furrowed brow she wasn’t buying it in the least.

 Keigo wondered just how much of a persona she was putting on for her hero work, and how much of it was real. There was no way all this 18+ nonsense could be her entire personality.

 Keigo thought she was fun to watch, sure, and definitely capable, but she’d always seemed very… fake to him. There were just some heroes who were so obviously playing a role, and unfortunately a lot of the female pros who were being pushed into the ‘sexy lady hero’ stereotype came across like that. Keigo was always glad he was a man, or this might have very well been his fate.

And he’d proven today that he was not cut out for that.

 Midnight kicked one of the crates aside and sat down on top of it, one leg over the other, and watching him closely.

“First model shoot?” she asked, “They can be a little awkward.”

 Keigo sighed and dropped his smile, shrugging a shoulder. “It’s not… I’m good at what I do.” That sounded very defensive. But he was! He was good at this! He had no problem with the posing, even though he hadn’t exactly practiced that before. It had actually been a lot of fun, in the beginning.

 “I didn’t say you weren’t,” Midnight pointed out, “Just that it can be awkward. I’ve been doing this since I was your age, and don’t tell anyone, but that was a while ago.” She winked at him and Keigo huffed a laugh. “But, even for me it can get… a bit much at times.”

 Keigo looked back at her with more intent this time, studying her face. Did she enjoy what she did? Well, she had picked her own brand, and she got more choice in what she did than he ever had, but she’d also picked that brand as a teenager. Playing into the R-rated hero thing got her a lot of fans, of course, and modelling contracts, and adult merch, and a ton of other things, so it had been a clever move for her career. But to constantly be seen like this? Keigo nearly shuddered at the thought.

 Midnight met his eyes and smiled, a little more gentle, and Keigo remembered that she, in fact, was also a high school teacher. “Don’t look at me like that, bird boy. I love what I do. It’s normal to get overwhelmed. Happens to the best of us. Just last week, I witnessed Present Mic screaming into a pillow for almost ten whole minutes.”

 Keigo pulled one of his wings across his lap and smoothed out some feathers. They’d been groomed extensively before the shoot, but he’d gone and gotten them all ruffled up again. “… is the pillow okay?” he asked after a moment.

 Midnight snorted. “That’s what we keep Eraser around for.”

 Would Keigo ever have any real friends among other heroes? He sure hoped so. He had never really had the opportunity to make friends.

 He looked down at his wing. “… I don’t like being on camera shirtless.” And in a room full of people, too. He pulled up his shoulders a little. “I mean. I know I’m objectively hot, right? This is all… very marketable.” He gestured down at his body, and then at his face.

 He'd been lucky to grow up attractive, he’d been told that many times. And yet.

“It doesn’t make sense. I just… they didn’t warn me beforehand, and so when they told me to, I just took it off and I started feeling worse.”

Letting go of his wing, he instead traced his fingers along his chest, where there weren’t even visible scars. “It’s stupid.”

 “The way you feel about your body is never stupid,” Midnight said, voice surprisingly firm.

Keigo jerked his eyes up to look at her.

“It’s unreasonable. I should be fine with it. Plenty of people are gonna look at these photos, and they’re not gonna think ‘oh, look at Hawks, he’s way too skinny to be attractive’ or ‘he’s tiny, how’s he supposed to save people’ or ‘hey, doesn’t Hawks look kinda like a girl?’. That’s just me thinking that.” He waved a hand in the air vaguely and sighed, feathers fluffing up as he did so.

 Midnight was still watching him. Keigo hated it. She seemed to be seeing right through him, and he himself didn’t even know what she was seeing.

“I have a feeling it won’t help any if I say I think you’re cute,” she finally said, “Because this is about you. This isn’t going to change, no matter how many crazy fans in the streets scream that they’d love to have your babies.” She paused. “Or… eggs.”

 Keigo couldn’t help the surprised laugh, and he tried to give her a half-glare. “I’m pretty sure I’d have perfectly human babies, thanks.”

 “I’ll believe that when you prove it,” Midnight teased, and Keigo realized she’d done that very much on purpose to distract him from his doom and gloom.

 She was a pretty good hero, he decided. The best heroes had to be the ones who knew how to help other heroes, and not just civilians. “I should probably get back out there and finish the shoot, huh?” he asked, glancing at the door.

 Midnight clicked her tongue. “Or you walk out there, apologize, and fly home like a good boy.” She met his eyes and winked, and Keigo blushed maybe a little bit, though he would deny that to his dying day. That was just how she was though, and her flirty nature was enough to keep him somewhat grounded and from letting his thoughts spiral again.

 “… I have responsibilities,” he protested half-heartedly, though home sounded very good right now. He hadn’t been living in the apartment long, but it was his and it was safe. He didn’t have to be Hawks there.

 Midnight waved a hand at him. “They must’ve gotten a bunch of pictures they can use. You’ve been here all morning, and it’s almost four now.”

 That late? Oh, shit. Keigo had a patrol at six. He’d need to pick up some food on the way. But, hey, at least patrol was going to make him feel less shitty about himself. He stood up and brushed himself off. “You’re probably right, Midnight. Thanks.”

 Midnight got to her feet as well, and Keigo nudged her arm with his wing.

“Kayama is fine, you know? No need to be all formal with the hero names.”

 Keigo never liked when this happened. He shifted. “I prefer Hawks.”

 Midnight’s gaze was too knowing, but he didn’t think that she knew the full extent of why he didn’t use his other name.

“Hawks it is, then. It’s a good hero name anyway. Very catchy.” She nodded her approval, and he smiled as he moved past her – only to be stopped by her hand wrapping around his wrist.

 “Okay, I know you barely know me, but I want you to listen to me. Because you’re just a kid, and you’re taking your first steps into this mess of a professional world. Are you listening?”

 Keigo nodded.

 Midnight’s gaze was serious. “No one can tell you who to be, Hawks. No one can tell you what to do with who you are, either. You want to save people, you’re good at that. You clearly don’t like this aspect of it all, and that’s fine. Not everyone is born for this. Being a hero isn’t about looking sexy, or letting them treat you like a piece of meat. It’s about finding danger and facing it to keep others from getting hurt. And you’re doing that. So you can damn well decline any of these publicity engagements that have you doing things you’re uncomfortable with. They’ll tell you to just go through with it, and not make a fuss, but they’re wrong, okay? Set up your boundaries now, because you’re allowed to. Do you hear me? You’re allowed to.”

 Keigo nodded again, a little dazed from her intensity. Or maybe her quirk. But she wasn’t using it right now.

 Midnight let go of his wrist, and placed both hands on his shoulders. “I look forward to seeing more of what you can do. Up in the sky, not on some advertisement for a product neither of us is ever even going to use.” She raised a hand and put a finger under his chin, forcing his head up a little. “Now, don’t look like a scared little bird that’s just been a cat’s plaything for the past ten minutes. Or else there’ll be rumors about the two of us and this closet.” She laughed, and Keigo swallowed.

 “Uh… yeah. Okay. Okay.” He was very off kilter now. Did she have that effect on everyone?

 Midnight looked him over, and then gave a satisfied nod. “Good. Now, remember that you’re an ass kicking, whip smart, devastatingly handsome young man, and get out there.”

 Keigo blinked at her, stood still for another second or so, and then turned and opened the door, his shoulders set, and the weight of his wings still heavy on his back.

He couldn’t wait to spread them again and get back to doing his actual job.

[xxmyhomexx]

Hazbin Hotel: The Club

This is my first story based on a new series that caught my interest, Hazbin Hotel. I haven’t watched it all, but I like the idea of Charlie and Alastor. And this is AU, meaning it has no revelation to the series! Enjoy :)

~~~

Charlie’s black eyes danced uneasily through the waves of people on the dancefloor. It was another stressful day at the Hazbin Hotel, and after feeling overwhelmed with such somewhat of a poor start, Vaggie and Angel Dust decided she needed a night out in Pentagram City. Dark Abyss, a new club that just opened, was the place they settled on, even though Charlie was against it as it was the weekend and there were still many things to prepare for Hazbin.

Despite her protests, here she was now sitting at the bar watching Vaggie and Angel Dust swinging their arms and twirling their hips to the loud music the DJ played in his booth. She shifted one leg over the other and pulled the skirt of her black sleeveless cocktail dress down when it shifted upward, exposing her long white legs. She tucked a strand of hair that fell from her braided bun behind her ear, tapping one of her kitten heels nervously on the floor.

Why was this a good idea again, she asked herself mentally. Clubbing was not her scene, and although she always loved a good drink once in awhile, dancing and wasted brought a bad taste to her mouth. She remembered for her birthday, Vaggie and Angel surprised her with a day out at a casino, and the night ended with them forcing her arms over their shoulders so she could actually stand in her room at Hazbin.

“Ugh,” she shuttered. “Never again.” 

“What can I get you, my beauty?” a black male spider-demon with four arms caught her attention. She saw two arms handing out drinks to other demons while the other two carried a pen and note pad.

“Uh...I’m sorry, I’m not in a drinking mood tonight. Perhaps something fruity and nonalcoholic?”

“One strawberry mocktail coming right up!” the spider demon smiled at her showing a row of red pointed fangs. “And uh, don’t worry about payment, pretty thing. It’s already on the house.”

“Really? That’s so sweet of you!” Charlie smiled.

“Sorry, honey, I wish it were me, but the owner actually beat me to it. He’s sitting right beside ya.”

Charlie tilted her head and swiveled in her seat, gasping and almost falling out when she noticed an all-too-familiar radio demon downing a shot of liquor beside her. Alastor, one of the most powerful demons in Hell, gifted her a sharp-tooth smile while adjusting his monocle above his right eye. Instead of a red suit and bowtie, Alastor opted for a more casual approach. Charlie’s red cheeks reddened deeper at his half-sleeve white collared shirt, tan khakis, and brown loafers. He didn’t remind her of the bartering demon who promised to help her with Hazbin, he appeared a total stranger.

His red eyes danced on her like a lion ready to pounce on its prey. His ears perked up and his antlers grew three inches in size as soon as Charlie spotted him. His radio-like laugh boomed in her ears as he rested his chin in his hand, tapping a finger against his cheek fondly.

“You and your friends enjoying your evening, my dear?”

“Alastor,” Charlie regained her composure. “You’re the owner?”

“A demon can enjoy pleasuring others without devouring souls, darling. And of course I am! Welcome to Dark Abyss, Charlotte Magne!” 

He jumped out of his seat and wrapped one arm around her, addressing the business around them. Demons tapped glasses together, and Vaggie and Angel Dust were busy conversing with strangers. Angel Dust caught the attention of a random orange wolf-demon while Vaggie was laughing with two other girls. Charlie groaned as Alastor raised her fruity mocktail to her lips, urging her to have a drink.

“It’s ok, Charlie,” he tilted his head as the demon princess gulped. “Relax, my dear. You don’t have to be drunk to have fun, child.” 

Charlie’s body went rigid in his arms as he leaned the glass closer to her mouth, parting her lips so she could take a few sips. The taste of strawberries was tarte and desiring on her tongue, running all the way down her throat when she took another swig. Alastor chuckled as he handed her her drink, his eyes observing her when she threw her head back to finish it all. Her curves danced out on her dress, and he could see her eyes were painted with light coats of mascara and winged eyeliner. Her face was round and poised with her hair back, a snicker leaving his throat. 

“Wow, that was good!” Charlie laughed. “Thank you for the drink, Alastor.” 

“No problem, darling,” Alastor scratched his chin. “Charlie...am I sensing...insecurity?” 

Charlie’s smile faded at the word “insecurity.” What the hell did he mean by that? After opening Hazbin, her hard work wasn’t exactly met with praise and commercial success. Katy Killjoy humiliated her on the news after her song, and almost the entire town mocked her and her friends. It was almost enough to bring her spirits even lower, and without her parents, it felt she was alone if it hadn’t been for Vaggie and Angel Dust. The demon princess clutched her glass tighter in her hands, turning away from Alastor and frowning. Even when her mother couldn’t answer her phone, she always left her daughter voicemails of encouragement and lighthearted notes.

And on top of the stress, clubbing wasn’t really much of a scene for her. She thought a nice night in her room or making rounds in the hotel were another way of destressing, a huge contrast from Angel Dust and Vaggie’s idea of fun. Alastor sensed her sadness and harrumphed, tilting her chin with a lift of his index finger to direct her attention back to him. Charlie gasped when she was suddenly pinned between the bar and the radio demon, a demonic purr emanating from his lungs.

“Let loose, Charlie,” Alastor urged her. “Have fun.”

He took her hand and lead her through the crowd of dancers until they were in the middle of the floor. Charlie’s chest grew heavy and images played in her mind, imagining the distasteful looks and angry eyes of partygoers. They were judging her, no! She couldn’t live with the rejection. She shut her eyes tight until Alastor’s hands massaged her shoulders, his head burying into the crook of her neck until his breath was hot in her ear. 

“Relax, sweetie,” he assured her. “They’re not looking at you.” 

One arm wrapped around her and brought her closer, her chest pressing against her back and his hands sliding down her front until they were planted on her waist. He started rocking his hips back and forth, his hands urging her hips to move in motion. Charlie rested her head against his muscular chest and did just that, running her fingers up Alastor’s arms until her hands were wrapped around his neck. She closed her eyes and smiled as she grinded against him, bucking herself against him. Alastor groaned and twirled her around, sliding his hands down her back.

Charlie’s legs started to kick, and Alastor smiled at her. She ran her hands through her hair, untying her braided bun and letting her long locks fall over her shoulders. he threw her hair back as the music took to her soul, her hair fanning around her as Alastor backed up slowly to watch her dance.

Every shift of her leg, every twirl of her hips, his gaze was on her. Charlie’s skirt fanned before her as she spun on her toes, a huge smile on her lips. Alastor growled and grabbed her again, dipping her in his arms close to the floor before helping her up in a bow. One of Charlie’s legs wrapped around his waist, and Alastor leaned forward just inches from her face.

“Charlie,” his voice cut deep. “You’re beautiful.”

“Take me away, Alastor,” Charlie wrapped her arms around his neck to hoist herself up. “Just you and me.”

“What about your friends?” Alastor challenged. “You know how protective Vaggie is with you.”

“They can take care of themselves,” Charlie insisted. “I just want you.”

Alastor hissed and widened his already huge grin. “As the lady wishes.”

~~~

Alastor locked the door to the VIP room and flipped on the light, a huge couch surrounding two tables. Charlie watched as he sauntered to the main seat, crossing one leg over the other and leaning back, motioning the demon princess towards him. Charlie gulped and her legs began to shake when she started to amble towards him. Her weight caught up with her when she stopped in front of him, shifting nervously at what to do. 

“You’re beautiful,” Alastor ran his fingers through her hair. “Even after seeing you on that picture show.”

“Ugh!” Charlie grunted when he flung her on her on the couch, straddling her like a cat. The cool black leather chilled her bare back, or maybe it was Alastor’s fingers sliding up her curves. Charlie gasped and arched her back when they rested on her chest. Alastor caught the front zipper between his thumb and index finger, jingling it for some time.

“Ah-ah, Charlie,” he eased her on the couch. “You’re mine. And tonight...I get to do whatever I want.” 

Her eyes darted when he dragged it down slowly and painfully, exposing her lingerie. She sat up so she could help him out of it, sliding it to the floor until she felt bare. It killed Alastor to see her in all black, dangerously licking his lips. He knelt on the floor and unstrapped her kitten heels, tossing them to the side before climbing on top of her. Charlie groaned when he started to rid himself of his own clothing, first his shirt followed by his pants. 

She had no idea that a radio demon could look this sexy. His six-pack and biceps stood out, and when he ran a hand through his hair, she was about done for. She suddenly felt exposed, almost covering herself before Alastor grabbed her wrists and pinned them above her head making her yelp.

“No covering yourself!” he warned her, his eyes flashing dangerously. His glare rocked Charlie’s nerves, only turning her on more. Nodding, Charlie closed her eyes and surrendered herself to Alastor’s demands. He kissed her deeply, interlacing his fingers in between hers. He parted her lips with his tongue, exploring her mouth thoroughly and decisively. Charlie moaned when he pulled away and worked his lips across her jaw and down her throat.

“Alastor!” she gasped. He started to kiss his way down her ridgeline, hands kneading at every single sensitive area he could find. His fingers payed extra special attention, amused at hearing her yelps and whimpers. After he was finished, he kissed his way down her navel. 

“Oh no!” Charlie gasped, arching her back. This torture was doing it in for her, and she just wanted him now. She rolled her hips to his, silently begging him to end his reign of terror. Alastor ignored her quiet please as he pecked at her ribs and trailed his teeth across each ridge, causing the princess to grate her teeth.

“You’re quite sensitive here, aren’t you?” Alastor whispered.

“Alastor...p-please...” Charlie begged. 

“Please what, princess?”

“Ugh...um...I...” 

“Sssshhh,” Alastor caressed her lips with the tip of his finger and smiled. “Good girl.”

He closed the distance between them and that was it. Soon, Alastor collapsed on top of her, his chest lowering and rising. He cradled Charlie in his arms, both exhausted but happy in their blissful moment. 

“You’re mine now, Charlotte Magne,” Alastor cupped her face and smiled kindly. “You beautiful woman.”

“I love you, Alastor.”

“Not as much as I you, princess.” 

Charlie kissed him and her fate was sealed. 

[imjeralee]

Wallflower: Chapter 15 - Goodnight (NSFW)

Raihan x F!Reader

Disclaimer: Do not own Pokemon

Note: This is my first Pokemon fanfic. I hope you enjoy it :) Originally posted on Archive of Our Own.

Summary: You’re an unassuming Pokemon breeder who works at the nursery in the Wild Area and he’s Raihan, the fearsome gym leader of Hammerlocke who has more than a million followers. You don’t want anything to do with him but he’s…persistent.

Rating: Mature/Explicit

Warnings: Lemon, smut, violence, language. This chapter is very NSFW

GOODNIGHT, SLEEP TIGHT,

SWEET DREAMS, TILL MORNING LIGHT"

...

...

A few days ago, Unova.

"Tell me how you're feeling. And try to be as honest as you can."

"...Well, where should I start?" She says, fidgeting in her seat, ".....I've noticed that nothing makes me happy anymore. The things I used to like to do - I don't feel anything for them. It either feels like a chore or I can't bring myself to do it. In fact, I don't have the energy to do it and I don't know why. I used to have a lot of hobbies; I had pokemon, I trained them, I travelled all over Unova, but gradually those went away one by one and it's getting really out of hand. I mean, I can't even get out of bed somedays. It's affecting my work, my life... My best friend recently told me she's dating a gym leader and I helped her look up her boyfriend's ex-girlfriend online and it turns out she's a supermodel. My friend got really insecure and I told her she shouldn't compare or feel lousy about herself. But hell....look at me. Don't get me wrong! I'm not jealous. I just...well...I feel useless. Out of all my friends, I'm the only one who is still single. I feel so lost and confused and I don't know who I am anymore and I keep feeling like I'm such a failure and I don't know why I'm here. I-I mean I feel the world is better off if I'm not in it."

There is a silence following.

A very long silence.

"I think you're depressed." The counsellor says, writing some notes on her notebook.

"...Oh."

"Have you tried antidepressants?"

"No."

"Then let me prescribe you some. It'll make you feel better."

"Are there any side effects?"

"There are some, but you shouldn't worry about them. Is there anything else you want off your chest?"

"Um, I'm not sure, I think that's about it." She mutters, before she exhales silently, throwing her gaze to the floor. "Actually, I don't think I can do this. Sorry, I don't mean to waste your time but this isn't really my sort of thing. I should get back to work."

"Are you sure?"

"Yeah." She picks up her bag and coat and thanks the lady, then leaves the counsellor's office hurriedly.

Well, she gave it a shot and it was pretty awkward. There really is far more to talk about, of course. Work sucks, her boss is horrible, her colleagues are backstabbing bitches, her pay is low. She's burnt out, exhausted - both mentally and physically. Her life is an endless loop - get up, go to work, go home, go to sleep - rinse and repeat...

There must be more to my life than this, right?

She walks down the street and stops at a pedestrian crossing; whilst waiting for the green Cacturne to appear, she takes out her phone and opens up a message that contains a picture of Leon, the Champion of Galar - her friend is trying to set her up with him. She hasn't officially met him yet because they're waiting for Opal to get the deets from Leon himself, and she forces out a laugh, wondering how things will change should they ever meet.

I guess this is the only good thing going on in my life right now. I can't afford to mess this up.

The green Cacturne appears and she slips her phone into her bag; she takes a few steps forward...and the sound of screeching brakes is the only thing she hears before a force slams into her from the side and everything goes black.

Present.

Espeon wakes up.

The front door is being unlocked. She sits upright, stretches in her basket and trots over, cocking her head to the side. On the frosted glass, she can see two shadowy figures and she can hear muffled conversation. It's her owner and her shiny new boyfriend. Espeon knows what this means and heads over to Goomy who is sleeping underneath a potted plant.

They're the only pokemon left in the lounge and Goomy wakes up after she prods him awake; Espeon meows once more just to get the message across. Goomy lets out an impossibly loud yawn before he inches to his pokeball, using a horn to push down on the button, returning to his capsule to sleep in peace. Espeon does the same, finding her capsule which is kept tucked near her basket and pressing down on the button.

She does this just in time when the front door finally opens and you step in with Raihan; he has his arms wrapped around you, pressing his lips over your neck heatedly whilst you close the door behind you. The living room is dark and you don't see your pokemon around - which means they're in their pokeballs and that's a good thing because you don't want them to witness this and also, they respect your privacy.

Reaching for the lights, you flip the switch and the lounge is lit up at once. You walk yourself and Raihan over to your sofa as he concentrates on applying light kisses over your jaw. You can pull the bottom of the sofa to turn it into a bed but Raihan plops himself down over a plush seat and pulls you into his lap, grinning up at you. You can only smile in return as he begins to remove your clothes, starting with your t-shirt whilst you begin to pull his headband and hoodie off.

Whilst Rose was admitted to hospital and Oleana, Leon and a few gym leaders accompanied him, you and Raihan gave some testimony to the police and then you were pretty much free to go.

The situation at the hotel is now under the control of the police and generally, everything's calming down now and returning back to normal therefore there’s no need to return. You didn't need to go to hospital either so you decided to go home and Raihan declined all interviews and photos with the paparazzi to go with you. Luckily, you weren't followed on your way back.

He hasn't been able to keep his hands off you and in the Corviknight taxi, he was tense, his hand never leaving your thigh. You were both throwing quick, somewhat flirty looks to one another from the corner of your eyes before your gaze would unexpectedly land to his crotch and his hand would slide up over your leg just an inch higher.

You wonder what might lie in store for you tonight as he was eager to get the both of you to a quiet and private place where you would be undisturbed. His home was really the closest option but you've both decided that he will spend the night at yours for a change.

And now that you're here, he wastes no time in getting the both of you naked as soon as possible.

As you kiss fiercely, he takes off your shirt and you have no choice but to break apart briefly so you can lift it over your head before tossing it to the ground somewhere and soon the rest of your clothes follow along with his. He pulls you back into his arms, his lips capturing yours in one intense kiss.

You’re wearing one of your sexy lingerie sets again which he appreciates as he occupies himself, running his fingers over the thin material of your panties and the black lacy cups of your bra although the garments are quickly pulled off your body in a few moments and before you know it, you're completely naked before him.

“Too bad you’re not wearing that dress I got you for the party,” Raihan mutters with a grin, “I was looking forward to ripping it off your body.”

You blush heavily in response as he looks at you from head to toe, using his hands to explore your body thoroughly. He caresses your ass and thigh and fondles your breast; he cups your plump mound in his palm then uses the tip of his thumb to brush over your nipple and tweaks it between his fingers and you gasp softly, closing your eyes as he leans forwards and feeds each of your breasts into his mouth, sucking your nipples keenly. You clutch onto his shoulders and dig your fingernails into his skin, holding him close to your bosom as he suckles and licks.

His erection nudges against your inner thigh, and you gently grasp his stiff organ and he hesitates as your fingers close around his length and begin to slowly pump. He sucks harder on your breast as you circle the tip of his arousal with your thumb and Raihan releases you with a wet pop, chuckling at your audacity.

Pulling you even closer to him, he begins to guide his aching member towards your entrance and you lift yourself off his lap slightly. He’s not using a condom this time and admittedly, it’s a better experience as long as you’re still on the pill. When he's angled himself properly, he eases himself inside you, prodding the tip against your folds and pushing them apart.

You're already wet for him and you let out a contented moan, biting down on your lip as he penetrates you with his engorged tip and slides all the way in and to the hilt, stretching your walls as much as possible. You lower yourself back down and he slides his hands from your waist and down to your ass, squeezing on your cheeks and grasping firmly which makes you flush even more.

Raihan begins to thrust immediately, forcing you to emit a satisfied moan. You gingerly rest your hands over his knees to keep yourself steady as you straddle his lap, riding him and meeting him thrust for thrust, rotating your hips and moving back and forth sensually.

He groans with pleasure, closing his eyes as he continues to pump upwards into your soft, warm core. With each thrust, he disappears deep inside you and withdraws, his cock coated in a slick sheen of juice, and he promptly thrusts back in, pushing your hips towards him so he can go even deeper. You moan loudly at the delicious friction, throwing your head back as you take all of him in, sheathing him with your hot, velvety walls. You let a ragged exhale as the pleasure begins to build up again.

You grab onto the sofa behind him, your hips knocking together as you're forced to pull your legs up due to the close proximity. He draws you into his embrace regardless, where you can feel his heartbeat against his ribs.

He buries his nose between your breasts as you move in unison, his hands clamping down firmly on your ass to control you, forcing you to move up and down on his cock whilst drawing a nipple between his teeth and into his mouth, running his tongue over your stiffening bud.

You moan his name, toes curling as his cock presses inside you deeply than ever before. He continues to tease, exploring your sopping pussy with his thick shaft whilst sucking on your breasts, lavishing you all over with his tongue.

When he finally lets go, you’re left panting and he hungrily presses his lips against yours, your tongues tangling once you open your mouth for air, allowing him entry. He pumps inside you continuously whilst you grow still, allowing him to take over, enjoying the feel of his arousal stroking your walls until you're raw.

You groan shamelessly before you begin to rotate your hips around his shaft, grinding your hips against his and rubbing your ass over his balls and Raihan grunts loudly, holding you even closer and pushing his cock inside you thoroughly, ensuring you are able to feel him as much as possible when he comes.

His legs twitch and you cry out as he holds onto you tightly as he cums, his seed shooting inside; Raihan loosens his grip with a satisfied groan, throwing his glance to you and your eyes meet. Panting, you cup his jaw with your hand and he leans forwards, your lips pressing together in a passionate kiss before you both pull away.

He searches your eyes for a quick moment before withdrawing, and you take this time to inhale a deep breath and brush your hair back before he moves you close to one armrest of the sofa; your heart beats wildly as you try to get up but he stops you by towering over you from behind, his chest pressing over your back.

He's never taken you in this position before and you emit a sigh as he presses a soft kiss on your shoulder and another on your upper back, trailing gentle kisses along the sinewy outline of your spine and you arch instinctively in response.

With a smirk, Raihan moves to his knees and you throw a curious glance behind you just as he abruptly pulls on your waist and your ass is pushed firmly against his hips.

You swallow down, shuddering all over as he begins nudging your legs apart. Gripping the armrest, you whimper as he grasps his arousal with his fist and angles it towards your dripping entrance, prodding his member against your swollen lips before entering you once more albeit from behind and with more force than usual, pushing his cock firmly inside and you hiss under your breath at the intrusion, your walls stretched to their maximum once again.

Raihan begins to thrust and you squeeze your eyes shut, holding onto the armrest for support as he grasps you by the hips again and pulls you towards him. "Do you know how long I’ve wanted to do this to you?" He growls, and your cheeks go pink.

You bite down on your lip as he pounds into you, hard. A fierce pace is set already which he controls with his hands on your hips, guiding you to move with him.

However, his large hands abandon your hips to rest on your back and you’re left to rut against him, letting yourself be pleasured by him. He caresses you all over, hands trailing over your shoulders before they find your breasts. He fondles and massages your chest, squeezing your nipples and pushing your breasts together before letting go briefly only to squeeze them together in his palms once more. You pant heavily as his hands return to your hips and ass, caressing you sensually before giving you a light smack.

You hang your head low, panting and groaning with pleasure whilst he lets go of your waist to grab your breasts once more, cupping them as they bounce into his palms from his forceful movements. Your brows furrow tightly before you decide to lower yourself over the sofa even further, moaning with content as he pinches your nipples.

As he thrusts, you rut back and forth against his hips and you grip the armrest tightly, your knuckles turning white.

He watches as he disappears inside your body and increases the pace, his thrusts becoming more intense and aggressive. Releasing one of your breasts, his hand travels down to your clit, fingers rubbing you furiously where your bodies are joined and you can't help but cry out.

The sofa begins to protest loudly from your movements, the legs of the couch scraping against the floor but he doesn’t stop. Lowering himself over you, he brushes your hair over one shoulder to nibble on the shell of your ear and over your temple, before finally pushing his lips against yours in a harsh but passionate kiss when you turn to face him.

Soon, he abandons your very sensitive clit, wrapping his arms around your waist and burying his nose into the side of your neck, thrusting into you fiercely from behind. Your fingernails dig into the leather, your legs threatening to give way. You can hear him grunting loudly against your ear although they sound rather feral, almost like snarling. You almost forgot how aggressive Raihan could be when it came to making love.

The sounds of his flesh slapping against yours and his wet cock driving inside your pussy fill your living room, along with your desperate pants and moans.

“Raihan, I...” You moan helplessly, squeezing your eyes shut.

You’re about to say it. You’re about to come but you discover words cannot escape your throat and you cry out louder and louder as he drives into you mercilessly; Raihan presses himself against your body firmly in one final thrust and spills his seed inside you.

You gasp uncontrollably, collapsing over the sofa with his arms wrapped around you. You ride the tremors that follow, enjoying the feeling that settles in your lower regions, your walls contracting firmly around his member.

Your heartbeat thunders as Raihan plants his face into the crook of your neck, kissing your nape affectionately before he grunts and lifts himself off your body, withdrawing from you at the same time.

Slowly sitting up beside him, you let out a hiss of pain, rubbing your back and thighs which are damp and laden with a mixture of cum and sweat. As you stretch, Raihan draws you into his lap, wrapping his arms around you securely until he notices the bite marks he inflicted on your body, ”Was I too rough?”

"Nope.” You reassure him, wrapping your arms around his neck; Raihan leans down and presses his lips firmly against yours whilst pulling you closer to him and you melt in his arms, closing your eyes as he pulls away for a split second to grin, before capturing your lips once more. You moan against him as he nibbles on the corners of your mouth and sucks on your bottom lip.

You believe another round might begin which you won't object to but you hear your stomach growling and all those thoughts grind to a complete and utter halt; Raihan begins to chuckle whilst you grow red.

"Let's order some food." He mutters, "What do you fancy?"

"I heard The Captain's Table is really good."

"Alright, let's order from there. Hey, Rotom." Raihan calls, and his phone flies out from his bag and in front of him.

"Zzzrt, yezzz?"

"Get me The Captain's Table menu."

"You got it!! Bzzzt, here ya go."

Raihan reaches for his phone gently and gestures for you to have a look; plucking the phone off him, you look through the online menu, particularly at some of the prices. It's pretty expensive - far more pricey than you realised and you inwardly gulp. "Tell me what you want and I'll get it for you." Raihan murmurs, giving you a tight squeeze.

As much as you're inclined to order the cheapest dish on the menu, you think it's best to order something which you can share with him. "What do you normally get?"

"The fettuccine."

"Let's order that then."

"Alright." He mutters, "It says we can get a free appetiser if we spend an additional hundred pokedollars."

"Well, um...let's see here....we could get a dessert?"

"They're very small portions though."

You both continue to scrutinise the menu intensely, hunching over the bright screen of his phone.

"What about the Malamar inspired squid'n fish curry?" He suggests.

"Okay, that sounds good." You reply with a smile and suddenly, Raihan gazes at you intently for a fraction longer than usual which makes your cheeks feel warm, "...What's wrong?"

Chuckling, he shakes his head and plops a hand on top of your head, ruffling your hair. "Nothing."

You don't think it's nothing but you decide not to press him on this matter; Raihan promptly calls the restaurant to order, but along with the curry and fettuccine, he orders a few more dishes and as you gape at him, he grins at you. When that's done, you and Raihan pull out the sofa bed properly and you grab a few pillows and the blanket from your bed and return to the lounge to join him, crawling into his lap and switching the TV on. You attempt to contact your boss - you try calling and messaging her but you receive no response. Recalling what Opal said to you at the party, you also try to call and message your friend, but to no avail.

Having had utterly no success in reaching anyone, you put your phone down and sprawl in Raihan's lap whilst he wraps his arms around your waist and you slide your hand atop of his. As he entwines your fingers together and holds your hand firmly with his, you throw your glance up to him but he merely smiles and presses his lips against your temple.

On the TV, the newscaster goes over the events at the Rose of the Rondelands before it shows a recording of your group outside the stadium being surrounded by the press. You're all too familiar with this scene when you see the journalists bombarding your group from every possible direction. You see Chairman Rose along with Leon, Kabu, Piers and Allister. And then there's you and Raihan but a tall journalist with a big camera blocks the majority of your face. Oh well, that's lucky....? The news quickly changes to show Eli being led away in a police car along with some captured members of Team Rocket and the newscaster reports that he's facing ten years in prison.

"Holy Beedrill." You croak. "Ten years?"

"...Eli and I used to be really good friends. I can't believe he's a Team Rocket Executive." Raihan mutters. He seems bothered by the news report so you change the channel.

"I'm sorry for what happened."

He doesn't reply, choosing to give your hand a tight squeeze. This new channel you've switched to is another news channel which proceeds to inform you that the gym challenge is to be put on hold in respect to the injured Rose, who has announced that all gyms are to be closed for a week. Stunned, you and Raihan quickly exchange glances.

"Rose has never given us a break before. He must be in a good mood."

"Really?"

"Yeah. Why don’t we visit Hoenn?" He adds, "Or we can go to Johto. We can visit the Dragon's Den in Blackthorn City."

"You've never been?"

"Nope."

"I trained there; I tried to catch a Dratini but they kept running away from me."

"Let's catch one together."

"Okay." You smile fondly at him and he grins in response, "But I'll need to check with my boss first. She hasn't messaged me yet."

Whilst Raihan begins looking up prices, you switch to a different channel again and it's also showing a brief recap of tonight's news albeit the presenter is dressed in casual wear and overall, it's an informal show.

"Team Rocket reared their ugly head tonight, but they were swiftly defeated by none other than Galar's gym leaders including our beloved Champion, Leon! Also, Hammerlocke's gym leader - who has recently confirmed he's dating - was seen this evening with his mysterious girlfriend. Looks like there's no more secrecy - the couple were photographed directly outside of Hammerlocke stadium and even posed for the camera - " The presenter exclaims, before the photograph of yourself locking lips with Raihan appears on screen, "Believe it or not folks, Galar's dragon tamer is officially taken! Chairman Rose himself has credited Raihan's mystery girl to have been a vital asset in stopping Team Rocket..."

There's canned applause in the background and live comments are shown in a display ticker at the very bottom of the screen. Most of the comments are.... positive, surprisingly enough. The photo of yourself and Raihan appears on screen for a second time yet you merely stare.

Raihan glances at you, noticing your impassive reaction. "Are you okay?"

"Yeah, I'm fine." You mutter; previously, you wondered whether you should tell Raihan about your encounter with Giratina, but you're not quite sure if it was all a dream.

You continue watching TV, sitting in his lap with his arms wrapped around you. There's nothing interesting on tonight. Occasionally, Raihan will smother you with kisses all over the side of your face, stroke your hair and nuzzle the top of your head. But most of the time, you just sit and chat. Then he'll caress your hand and squeeze your fingers. The takeout's still not here yet so eventually you climb out of his lap and Raihan begins looking at his phone as the TV plays in the background, and you grab your laptop off the side table until he spots the box of The Patrats game and picks it up.

"What's this?"

"The Patrats; it's a really popular game."

"What do you do in it?"

"It's a life simulation strategy game; you create a Patrat and make it do whatever you want."

"Can I try?"

"Sure, go ahead."

You hand him your laptop which he props up in front of him and you slot the disc inside; when it loads, he begins playing around whilst you go through tonight's photos on Rotom. Before your group split up, you had taken a selfie with Raihan, a selfie with Leon, a selfie with Raihan and Leon, and finally, a group photo with Rose, Oleana and the gym leaders. What a night to remember.

You take some time to inspect each and every photo before you fondly gaze at your photo with Raihan. This would be the first photo you've taken with him. It's a great photo, but perhaps using a few filters wouldn't hurt... You're about to go into your photo-editing app until you realise Raihan's gone pretty quiet. You've left him to his own devices for a while so you quickly turn to him.

"How are you getting on?" You ask, and Raihan's eyes are glued to the screen and you glance at your laptop as well - he's still playing the game and it's then you notice something's not right. "What are you doing?"

Raihan chuckles and grins widely at you, pointing at a random patrat that's running on a treadmill on the screen. "Look."

You stare as he cancels the command to go to the fridge to ‘make protein shake’; it's his Patrat which he's named  'Raihan'....and he has moved it into your neighbourhood and most specifically, he's moved it into your home. Somehow your Patrat's husband is gone and so are her ten pups - Raihan's gotten rid of them, kicked them out somehow - and now he makes his patrat interact with yours (your patrat is busy painting upstairs in her room). You watch as Raihan clicks on a command to 'flirt' and soon his patrat is busy courting yours with a variety of ‘kiss claws’ and ‘nuzzle noses’ commands before the meter fills up and they hastily jump into the burrow together and fireworks start shooting out.

You turn to Raihan with a frown whilst he laughs and grins at the interaction, "Stop making them WooHoo. There's more to the game than that." You peel the laptop out of his hands, deciding to take it away from him. You let the patrats finish woohoo-ing and they settle into deep sleep. The game proceeds to fast forward so you take this time to look around the house. "What happened to the pups?"

"They turned into Pidoves and flew away."

"What!" You exclaim, before you check out the rest of your patrat's details. "What happened to her job?? She was a CEO."

"She decided to work in a daycare."

"No, she didn't. She couldn't have." You shoot a warning look at Raihan but he merely chuckles louder and scoops an arm around you. You close the game before further mayhem can ensue and then the doorbell rings.

It should be the takeout. You're about to leave bed but Raihan says he'll get the door - and he pulls on some clothes before he gets off the sofa and heads over to the door, opening it to reveal the deliveryman on your doorstep, holding three bags in hands. Raihan greets him cheerfully, pays for the delivery and shuts the door.

Instead of going to the dining room to eat, you settle all the dishes on the sofa bed. Raihan has treated you to the Malamar-inspired squid'n fish curry, exotic Alola sushi rolls, beer battered finneon fish fingers and chips with gravy sauce, the Crawdaunt lobster fettuccine and the free appetiser, garlic prawn and avocado crostini. He's gone all out, ordering some of the most expensive or most popular dishes on the menu for you. You're surprised that Raihan makes an exception when it comes to dining with you because you were worried that the food wouldn't be healthy.

And after the late dinner, it's time to finally retire for the night. You both take a shower together and return to the sofa bed to sleep. You've always been alone in your little cottage house so it's nice to have someone here with you.

Under the covers, Raihan spoons you from behind, snuggling you affectionately and you drift off to sleep.

...

Later.

Raihan wakes up when he feels something wet on his hand; it's Espeon, and she stops licking his fingers to purr affectionately at him. He chuckles and strokes the top of her head before turning to the side where his girlfriend is - only to realise she's missing from the bed. He sits up at once and calls her name. There's no response. Espeon meows loudly and jumps on top of the blanket and she's shortly followed by Drifloon who floats over.

"Where'd she go?" He murmurs, and Drifloon points a stringy hand towards the direction of the kitchen.

Peeling the covers off himself, Raihan swings his legs round and gets off the bed to stand, stretching. Espeon and Drifloon follow him into the kitchen where he sees the cupboard of the kitchen sink is open, and she's sleeping inside, huddled up and curled into a ball. The way how she is sitting looks rather uncomfortable, with her legs tucked to her chest and the side of her head pressed against her knees. Despite all this, everything she does reminds him of a cute little Skitty. Now he understands why her Espeon and Drifloon had woken him up; they stop at her side and Espeon paws at her head but she doesn't stir. Drifloon tries to tug at her arm as well, but to no avail.

Raihan heads over; the Pokemon inch backwards to let him through and he squats down to her level, reaching for her and pulling her out of the cupboard and into his arms.

She finally wakes up, opening her eyes groggily. "...Huh? What..."

"Hey..." He sits cross-legged on her kitchen floor where it's terribly cold, "You okay?”

She looks up and around in the darkness, blinking in confusion before her gaze lands on him. "Oh...I...." Rubbing her head and neck, she groans, "Shit. You're not....Rai, you weren't supposed to see....I....I mean, this is...."

He chuckles as she exhales in frustration. She's too tired to move and remains slumped against his chest whilst he bundles her up, rubbing her arms, "It's okay..."

She shakes her head. “No, it’s not... you’ll think I’m weird and messed up...”

"No. You already told me about this," He murmurs as he peers down at her, “The DVD, remember?”

She hesitates before throwing her despondent gaze to her lap.

"It's okay." Raihan whispers in her ear, trying to soothe her, "...It’s okay. C'mon, let's go back to bed."

A brief silence follows; eventually, she nods and Raihan lifts her up, carrying her back to the lounge. She wraps her arms around him in response, burying her face into his neck. Espeon and Drifloon follow them and Raihan settles her over the bed before he slips in beside her, wrapping an arm around her shoulder and pulling her into his chest. He brushes her hair and tucks it behind her ear, then holds her hand and threads their fingers together where occasionally he'll press a kiss over her knuckles. Meanwhile, Drifloon tugs and pulls the covers over them; Raihan thanks him whilst Espeon jumps onto the bed and curls up near their feet.

"Rai?"

"...Yeah?" He fights back a yawn, but he's becoming sleepy already.

"...I saw something back at the energy plant: Giratina." She murmurs tiredly, "I was in this weird place....everything was upside down or backwards...and I looked up and it was there. It saw me and came over...and I looked into its eyes..."

He gives her a squeeze, encouraging her to continue.

"I don't know what happened but since then...It's weird...it's like...the small things that used to be bother me, I'm no longer scared or.... I don't care."

"Is that a good or bad thing?"

"I don't really know..." She grows silent, her sentence trailing and he quickly peers over. Her eyes are closed and she's breathing gently but quietly. Raihan returns to snuggle her, and they're about to drift off to sleep until her Rotom sounds off, indicating a message. Either way, she's forgotten to mute or switch off her phone for the night. She stirs again with a groan, having been disturbed.

He feels her shift slightly in his grip, reaching for Rotom; once she grabs her phone, she swipes the screen and scans the message wordlessly.

"Who is it?" He asks, exhausted.

"It's Allister. The police told him that my boss' son...the cause of death was not natural," She slowly lowers her phone, turning round to lie on her side facing him. "...My boss' son was murdered....and whoever killed him could be still out there."

Meanwhile, somewhere in Galar.

A man pulls up to his driveway, carrying a bag of groceries as he gets out of his car. Usually at this hour, everyone's at home and snug in their bed, warm and cosy, but he likes shopping at this time when there's not many people and it's quieter.

He heads over to his front door and unlocks it, entering the living room. Checking his phone quickly, he sees a social media page he follows has posted up news about the body of a six year old boy being discovered deep in the Glimwood Tangle.

"Well I'll be..." He mutters.

Meanwhile, another social page he pulls up shows a photo of a missing child. He moves to the kitchen, switching on the lights and he can see his neighbours outside in their backyard, enjoying a late night barbecue. They wave at him from their seats around the fire and he smiles and waves in response, then he draws the blinds shut. There's a door to his left with five locks which he proceeds to unlock as silently as possible.

Opening it, a thin stream of light floods in, revealing a staircase that leads to a basement.

Most houses in Galar don't have a basement, but his does.

And the basement is reminiscent of a bedroom, the walls covered in crayon drawings. A little boy sleeps soundly on a bed in the corner; he looks no older than five.

The man goes down the stairs, treading on each step quietly and approaches the bed. The boy's leg has slipped out; a shackle is looped around his ankle, attached to a long chain that is fixed to the wall. The man tucks the boy's leg under the covers and smiles.

"Goodnight, sleep tight," He whispers, "Sweet dreams, till morning light."