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bradshawsbaby · 2 years ago

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Letters to My Love // Part V

Boogie Woogie Bugle Boy

Series Masterlist

Pairing: Bob Floyd x Female Reader

Summary: When you signed up to volunteer with the USO, you never anticipated that you would meet a man like Ensign Robert Floyd. Fate brings you together one balmy spring evening in Charleston—the night before Bob is set to ship off across the Atlantic. Pen and paper become your only means of sharing your heart with the naval aviator who’s captivated it, igniting a correspondence that spans the distance between you. Can love blossom even as war rages and thousands of miles keep you apart?

Word Count: 3.7k

Author’s Note: As always, if you’re interested in learning more about the historical context of any of the letters, or if you have any questions about anything that gets discussed, feel free to reach out! I will say that Bob’s mother’s remedy for influenza that gets mentioned in this chapter was a real “home cure” that people used to use back in the day!

Set the Mood: If you’re looking for some 1940s vibes, check out the playlist I made to pair with the story!

The title for this chapter comes from The Andrews Sisters song of the same name.

Dedication: As always, this story is dedicated to @luminousnotmatter. I could thank you endlessly for all the love and support!

Warnings: Alternating POV, references to war and its impact, mentions of rationing, discussion of war casualties and death, references to church and prayer, a ton of fluff as always.

October 12, 1942

Dear Peach,

First of all, I want to start by saying that I’m so sorry for the troubles your family went through at the end of the summer. Little Frankie sounds like quite the trooper, but I’m sure it must have been hard on all of you to see him so sick like that. I’m real, real glad to hear that he’s on the mend. Dottie, too.

It’s funny—even though I’ve never met her, it’s not hard at all for me to believe that your sister was one of the few babies who survived the Spanish Flu back in 1918. From everything you’ve shared with me, it sounds like it would take a lot to break Dottie Sheridan. I’d bet my last dollar that she gives Paddy a run for his money on a regular basis. Maybe don’t tell her I said that though. I do want her to like me, should we ever get to meet in person one day.

You know, a couple summers back, my little brothers ended up coming down with a case of influenza. It seemed as though they picked it up from some of the kids they’d been playing with. It might sound crazy, but my mother would take a handkerchief, sprinkle it with whiskey, and make my brothers inhale the fumes every night before they went to bed. I don’t know where she learned that remedy, but would you believe that the two of them were right as rain after just four days? I’m confident that everyone in your household is the picture of health now, but you might want to give it a try should anyone else come down with the flu. I can’t explain it, but it did seem to do the trick!

I’ll selfishly admit that the weeks that went by without receiving a letter from you were desolate ones indeed. I received a couple letters from home, which were wonderful, but I found that my mind kept wandering back to sunny Charleston instead of the farmlands of Iowa. When I finally saw your handwriting on the envelope they handed me during Mail Call, it took everything in me not to jump up and down like a fool and make a scene. Just like you, I’ve been rereading your letters each night before lights out. I know we haven’t been exchanging messages for long, but each one lifts my spirits more than you could know. And around these parts, that’s a real special thing.

Despite being so far away from home and from everything that’s familiar and comfortable, when I close my eyes and imagine sharing a slice of your mama’s peach tart or getting to dance with you again and hear your pretty voice, I feel as though everything’s going to be alright. Even if the feeling only lasts for a minute or two, it gives me something to hold onto in the moments when it feels like maybe the world really is going to pieces. So thank you for that. Your kindness and your sweet words of encouragement are helping me get through this war, minute by minute and day by day.

I think, if you’re agreeable to it, that I’d really like to take you up on your offer to show you the world one day. Maybe even from up in the air. I may be Paul’s backseat gunner, but I know a thing or two about piloting an aircraft. You can trust me. Any places in particular you’d like to see, Peach? I’m all ears.

I promise you that I am most certainly NOT remembering you through rose-colored glasses. If you remember, my glasses are very much of the non-rose-tinted variety. But they do aid my vision, which helped me to see that night back in May just how absolutely swell you are. I hope it doesn’t embarrass you if I say that I still remember the way your smile put the stars to shame that night on King Street. And though I know no rehearsal is necessary, it does make me quite happy to think that you’ll be practicing a song with me in mind. I know any song you pick will be beautiful, but how about “Someone to Watch Over Me?” It was the first song we danced to, after all. And I’m sure you’ll knock it out of the park. If Gershwin was still alive, I know he’d be thrilled to hear someone doing such justice to his music.

I’ll have you know that it took me quite some time to get the peace and quiet I needed to write this letter because Tommy Boy and Benny simply would not stop chattering in my ear. At first, it was just more of their usual advice—most of which, for your sake, I don’t actually take—but then I realized they were trying to pass along messages of their own to you! I very clearly, and perhaps a bit selfishly, told them that you were my pen pal and that they’d just have to go find some of their own. Benny pouted a bit, but Tommy Boy just grinned, slapped me on the shoulder, and told me he’d never been prouder.

They both say hello, by the way. I did agree to pass that much along.

Paul’s sitting near me right now, writing his own letter home to Natasha and the kids. He wanted me to thank you for your prayers and for your kind words. He’s not one to get all mushy most of the time, but I can tell that your thoughts for him and his family really do mean a lot to him. And he said he’s definitely going to take you up on that jewelry offer when we get home. He may have made some comment about buttering Natasha up when we finally return home, after leaving her alone with two babies for so long. Although, now that I think about it, my little goddaughter, Clara always insists that she’s a big girl. So I’m sure she would take great offense at me referring to her as a baby. Promise you won’t tell on me?

Peach, I hope you know how truly extraordinary you are. I find it just about impossible to believe that people don’t take notice of you. To me, that feels like people taking a stroll outside and not taking notice of the sun. But it means more to me than words can say that you can relate to me in that way. Feeling like you see me, like you really understand me—that doesn’t happen to me often. Especially not with girls as lovely as you. I’m very much looking forward to us getting to know each other better and better.

As far as childhood stories go, I want to make it very clear that Paul and Natasha were solely responsible for any and all mischief that was had in our youth. I was very much just along for the ride. I promise you that it wasn’t my idea to put frogs in our mean teacher’s purse during the school picnic when we were in the third grade. And I certainly wasn’t the one who kidnapped our class hamster so that he could “live a life of freedom in the great outdoors.” Though I will admit I may have been present when the crime was committed. I was a very nerdy and awkward kid, which I’m sure isn’t hard at all for you to imagine, so I do have to credit Paul and Natasha with providing me with some of the most exciting and interesting moments of my life. There’s hardly a memory I have that doesn’t involve the two of them. I think you and Natasha would get on wonderfully. Maybe one day, the two of you will get to meet.

What about you, Miss Peach? Were you a rebel growing up in Georgia, or a goody two shoes like me?

I’m glad to hear that President Roosevelt is keeping you all informed back home, but I’m sorry to hear that the prices are still going up. I know you already mentioned that they started rationing sugar. I hope more rations aren’t coming your way, but, truth be told, I have a sinking feeling that they will be. We’ve been burning through supplies like crazy over here, and it always feels like a scramble to get more of what we need. But I’d still hate to think of you or anyone else having to go without. It just doesn’t seem right. But then, I suppose a lot in this world doesn’t feel right at the moment.

Thank you for sharing the president’s words with me, Peach. I passed them on to the rest of the fellas, and we’re all mighty appreciative of it. I have to say, even if it was Roosevelt’s words, they sounded a lot sweeter coming from you. My safety and comfort feel like a small price to pay if it means that you and my family and the rest of the good folks back home get to rest well each night.

I hate to end my letter to you on a sad note, but thinking of men who aren’t concerned about themselves makes me think of some of the boys that we just lost recently. Just last week, in fact. They weren’t part of my squadron, but I did know several of them. They were a couple years ahead of me at Annapolis, and they were bunking on the carrier with my squadron. Good men, every single one of them. They were shot down during what was supposed to be a fairly routine fly-over. They leave behind mothers, fathers, brothers, sisters, fiancées, sweethearts, and friends. But I think a part of them will still be here, so long as those of us who remember them are still around. They were men, like President Roosevelt said, who put duty and country before themselves. And they deserve to be remembered.

We also recently lost some enlisted men—some sailors on a nearby carrier. We’d gotten to know them pretty well these past few months, and it was a tough blow. I was saddest to learn about the death of a boy named Timmy [REDACTED]. I say boy because that’s what he was. We got to talking one night, him and I, and he admitted to me that he was only sixteen. He’d lied about his age and somehow managed to squeak on by—my guess is that with the draft on, they’re willing to look the other way when boys jump up to volunteer. Sixteen years old. I tell you, I don’t think I could have stomached this at sixteen. I can barely stomach it now at twenty-two. I promised him I wouldn’t tell, and I feel a little guilty to be breaking that promise now that he’s gone, but I think someone else besides me should know how brave he was. He gave everything he had for the family and the country that he loved. I know I’ll never forget him. I know I keep piling more and more names on your list, but maybe you can remember him, too? That way, his legacy will live on. I think he’d be happy to know that.

If any of my letters ever feel like too much to you, Peach, please let me know. I don’t want to unburden my own heart at the cost of your peace of mind. I’m thankful for all the ways you listen and make me feel heard, even with the entire Atlantic in between us. Just getting these words down on paper, knowing that you’ll be reading them soon, fills me with a great sense of calm. Has anyone ever told you what a great pen pal you are?

My mother wouldn’t be happy if she heard me admitting this, but sometimes I’m so dead tired at the end of the night that I fall asleep without saying my prayers. On the nights that I do manage to stay awake, however, I pray for you right after my family, you and Paddy and Dottie and Frankie. I pray that you’re safe and happy and well. I’m always glad to hear that it’s so.

Goodbye for now, Peach. I look forward to your next letter, as I always do.

Very Sincerely Yours,

Bobby

November 3, 1942

Dear Bobby,

I was so thrilled to receive your last letter in the mail, but I admit that I was crying like a baby by the end of it. I’m so sorry for the friends that you lost, especially young Timmy. Sorry always seems like such a trite thing to say in the face of such a tragedy, doesn’t it? It doesn’t feel like it encompasses even half of the pain and the grief and the sorrow that follow in the wake of such horror. But for lack of any other words that would suffice, I’m afraid that “I’m sorry” is all that I can say. Please know that I mean it from the very bottom of my heart.

I hope you don’t mind, but I showed the last part of your letter to Dottie. She walked into the kitchen and was very concerned about why I was such a bawling mess, so I thought it would be better if she heard it directly from you. My big sister is much less prone to tears than I am, but even she cried when she read your beautiful tribute to that young man. We went to church the next day and lit candles in honor of Timmy and all the young men who were lost. I’m so incredibly touched that you would want to share their memories with me, Bobby. I will most certainly treasure them in my heart and pass them along to anyone I can. I don’t want them to be forgotten either. I don’t think anyone deserves to be forgotten. Everyone leaves their mark on this world, no matter how tiny it might seem to others. Even at just sixteen, Timmy clearly left his mark.

I can only begin to imagine what it must be like for you over there, flying dangerous missions yourself and watching those around you, men who you’ve shared laughs and good times with, make that final sacrifice. Please don’t ever feel like you can’t share it with me, Bobby. If you have to live it every day, and face that reality, then the very least I can do is lend a listening ear. I’m always here for you, whatever you need to get off your chest.

To be honest, you’re the first real pen pal I’ve ever had. I’m glad to hear that I’m doing a good job, because I happen to think you’re a terrific pen pal, and I wouldn’t want to let you down in return. It’s kind of funny—when I’m sitting down to read your letters or write one of my own, I sometimes forget that there’s an entire ocean between us. Sometimes, when I read your words, it feels like you’re right here next to me. I can hear your voice, even if it was so long ago now that we were last together. And it just makes it all feel so real to me. You’re a rather wonderful writer, you know.

Hm, now let’s see. Which part of your wonderful letter should I respond to next? I have it laid out in front of me right now, so that I don’t miss or forget anything. Should we discuss your mother’s rather unorthodox cure for the flu? I’d never heard of whiskey in a handkerchief before! I thought Paddy was going to split his sides from laughing so hard when I told him and Dottie. He said that he’s not so sure he should be sticking booze in his baby’s face, but that he’d be more than happy to try that remedy himself! We’d only ever been aware of good, old-fashioned chicken noodle soup and lots of rest. I’m hoping we don’t have another influenza scare any time soon, but we’ll be sure to try the whiskey trick if we do.

Now as for seeing the world—I’ve never been flying before. On the one hand, it seems very exciting and exhilarating, but on the other hand, it seems like the most terrifying prospect in the world. Bless those Wright brothers for being the first ones to give it a go. I suppose if I ever wanted to expand my horizons, however, I’d have to get on an airplane. Ocean liners aren’t exactly the most efficient means of travel. And if I’d trust anyone to take me up in the air for the first time, it would be you, Bobby. Like I mentioned once before, my parents went to Paris for their honeymoon, so I’ve always wanted to see it. Did you know that they call it the city of love? I suppose it must be very romantic with a nickname like that. I’ve also always wanted to see Italy—the Colosseum, the Pantheon, all that amazing art. I imagine it must be so magical. Maybe not right this moment, but Rome has certainly survived its fair share of catastrophes, if I remember my history correctly. I’m sure it will survive this, too.

How about you, Bobby? What parts of the world would you like to see when all of this is over?

“Someone to Watch Over Me” is one of my favorite songs. And now every time I hear it, I think of you and that dance we shared at the USO. If that’s the song that you’d like to hear, then I’ll happily start practicing it right away. Mr. Gershwin certainly knew what he was doing when it came to composing, didn’t he?

Don’t tell them this—we wouldn’t want them getting big heads now—but I always find it to be a delight when you share stories of Tommy Boy and Benny. It makes me so happy to know that you have such good friends over there with you. And I always get a good laugh, imagining their antics. You must have the patience of a saint, Bobby, to put up with all of it. As I’ve said before, I know all too well what it’s like to have to hide away to carve out a little peace for letter writing—Dottie is constantly trying to throw her two cents in whenever she can. I actually have Frankie to thank for my solitude at the moment. He’s been a bit fussy, so Dottie hurried off to check on him. I adore my sister more than life itself, but even I can admit that it’s a bit easier to concentrate when she’s distracted.

I absolutely cross my heart that I will never let it slip past my lips that you called our young Clara a baby. It will be our little secret. I’m sure she and Natasha and Paul, Jr. will be thrilled to receive the letter Paul’s writing to them. Paul sounds like such a wonderful husband and father. He reminds me of Paddy in that way. The two of them seem to have a lot in common. Tell Paul that I’m more than happy to lend any assistance I can to helping him pick out the perfect gift for buttering up his wife. Trust me, I’ve helped my dear brother-in-law do it on more than one occasion.

Speaking of Paul and Natasha, I’m shocked to learn they were such little hooligans when the three of you were growing up. Frogs in your teacher’s purse? Kidnapping the classroom hamster? What kind of trouble did you not get into, I should ask? I think that perhaps you were more of a little rebel than you’re willing to admit, Ensign Floyd. I myself was quite the prim and proper little lady growing up back home in Georgia. Believe me, I was much too shy to be getting into any sort of trouble with anyone. Truth be told, I really sort of kept to myself, even when I was a child. But I always had Dottie, thank goodness. She’s four years older, and she’s always looked out for me. She’s my best friend and my biggest champion. It would be lovely to get to meet Natasha one day, too. Any friend of yours must be a delightful person who I’m sure I would like very much.

Your words are sweet as honey, Bobby, and make me feel just as warm and cozy inside. Whenever I’m having a difficult day, or the weight of the world’s troubles feel like they’re pressing down on me, I read your letters and they never fail to make me smile. I always knew that there were good men out there in the world—my father and Paddy have always been prime examples of that to me—but I think I was starting to doubt that there were many men left who were truly kind and good-hearted. You put those fears in my heart to rest. You are such a good man. I know we haven’t known each other long, and that most of our conversations have been through letters, but your warmth and your kindness always shine through.

I may not be able to speak to how unhappy your mother would be to learn about you falling asleep before your prayers—I like to think she’d understand, given the circumstances—but I can say with total confidence, despite never having met her, that she would be very happy and proud to know just what kind of man her oldest son is. I’m sure she already knows and is already so proud.

I keep you in my prayers every night, too, Bobby. You and Paul and his family and Tommy Boy and Benny, and all the rest of your squadron. All I ask for is that you all come home safely. And soon.

You’re in my thoughts. I look forward, as always, to your next letter, whenever it may arrive.

Affectionately Yours,

Peach

P.S. I almost forgot to mention that it was Frankie’s first Halloween! Unfortunately, the annual parade in town was canceled, but everyone still decorated and the children in the neighborhood got to go trick-or-treating. Dottie made Frankie a little pumpkin costume—he was the cutest little pumpkin you ever did see! We still have some candy lying around the house, which I wish I could send to you. Did Clara, Paul, Jr., and your brothers dress up this year? I hope they had lots of fun!

#robert bob floyd #robert floyd #bob floyd #bob floyd x reader #x reader #x female reader #top gun #top gun: maverick #lewis pullman #WWII AU #1940s AU

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tellthemeerkatsitsfine · 1 month ago

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Thoughts on Taskmaster s18e07, written as I watch it:

- Genuine question: do we think Andy brought that outfit from home? Or did he tell Taskmaster that he wants to dress as a Roman soldier, and they let him use Alex’s costume from season 11? I’ve not gone to compare pictures or anything to check, that’s just my first thought when I saw what he’s wearing. Will it relate to his prize task? Or is he wearing it for no reason? Time will tell.

- If I saw Rosie Jones on the street wearing a papier mache head of Greg Davies, the only thing that would surprise me about that would be that I wouldn’t expect to see Rosie Jones in Canada. Otherwise, it would seem entirely natural.

- I was on board with Babatunde’s until he mentioned that he plays music without headphones in public. I always like when contestants try to genuinely answer the prize task’s remit, even if that means sacrificing being funny. And we can all relate to a genuine love of music. But… I know he was joking about playing music out loud in the park, but still. Even as a joke. All sympathy gone, for someone who would even joke about being that guy. Sorry Baba.

- I haven’t seen Emma’s prize yet, just seen her introduce it, but I can’t get over how intense she is when selling her prize tasks. Leaning forward in her seat. Jumping in the explanation like he’s been rehearsing it in her head for the last hour. I want her on every show.

- Actually, if you’re going for practical and accurate answers to the prize task remit, which everyone should be at all times, a hat’s probably the best answer. Wouldn’t require you to keep your hands busy carrying stuff for the entire rest of your life.

- And she took a video of herself adorably showing moisturizer under the hat. Well done Emma. The video with her in it really sells it, I think. The contestants aren’t usually in the pictures or videos of their prizes on the screen.

- I mean, well done to Jack for putting a bit of effort into this prize task, more than he’s put into most of his prizes. But also, that does not fit the task remit at all.

- Took me several moments to work out why Jack’s song sounded familiar. I think it sounds a lot like Stewart Lee’s folk song from Comedy Vehicle, the observational comedy in the style of Bob Dylan. Not sure how similar they are, and again, cannot be bothered to go check.

- We’ve all just been waiting for one thing, right? Greg, Alex, the other contestants, the audience, just going through the motions and pretending anything else is interesting while we wait for the man who’s dressed as Roman soldier to explain himself. So what the fuck, Andrew?

- And I write this next point after having seen his prize: Andy what the fuck? That… I mean it’s the least of my issues with it, but that had nothing to do with Roman soldiers. Who was that guy in the video, dropping cricket balls into it? I 100% believe that Andy Zaltzman owns that thing. If a different comedian, brought that up, I'd assume they just told production staff to find something like that. But I believe Andy owns this. How has he never mentioned it before? Where did he get it? Where did the video come from? Someone please submit some of these questions to the Bugle’s Ask Andy; I’ve already asked him about a BBC questionnaire he filled out in 2004 so I can’t submit any more weird stuff.

- I continue to love Emma’s unjustified intensity. And her pattern, throughout the season, of solidarity with Rosie Jones (an Emma + Rosie team would have been great), and of animosity with Andy. “I have to move boroughs” made me laugh.

- Yeah I agree with that scoring. But I hope we get an outtake where they further question Andy on what the fuck that was.

- I like Emma’s visor under her Clouseau hat. I re-watched the first couple of Pink Panter movies with my dad last week, and fucking hell, I forgot how funny they were. Still made me laugh so much, just like they did when I was a kid. And now that I’ve watched them so recently, I can really appreciate how accurate Emma’s costume is. And how appropriate a character it is to invoke on Taskmaster.

- Andy’s idea to “Call Ian Bell, the cricketer, on my phone” made me laugh out loud. It’s just that it’s such an Andy Zaltzman idea. All the way along he’s been trying to find the most absurd workarounds for tasks, and if any other contestant were doing that I’d think they were a highly competitive meticulous student of the game, who’d studied all previous workarounds and believed that every task is a trap, every trap is an opportunity. But I know that’s just how Andy Zaltzman’s mind works. That’s the root of so much of his comedy, just seeing a different way of interpreting words. I’d made several guesses about how his offbeat comedy style would translate to Taskmaster, but I hadn’t guessed this, the way that side of him would come out in the most absurd ideas for how to re-imagine tasks. Like a debater trying to squired a resolution. Like a man trying to claim that a piece of wood is a locket. Or that a cricket player is a bell.

- I mean… is the obvious guess not to think that the bell isn’t on any of the ropes? They wouldn’t make it purely a game of guessing the correct rope, so if there are no clues as to which rope it is, are they just a red herring? Even if there is a bell attached to one of those ropes, could you just go inside, find a bell, right it, and call the task done? The doorbell is right behind them, could Andy just turn around and ring that?

- Despite everything I just said, and how I’m finding it frustrating that Andy is always looking at tasks creatively but it has not occurred to him to try non-rope options, it is pretty funny to watch Andy Zaltzman keep pulling on ropes and having balls fall on his head. Some solid slapstick humour, in the style of those movies I’ve been watching lately. This is why Emma decided to invoke Clouseau.

- Finished Andy’s task now, that was quite funny. Cannot work out why he didn’t at least try ringing the doorbell. Just kept knocking stuff onto his head. I don’t really think of Andy Zaltzman as a slapstick comedian. Maybe he should try clowning. I liked it when he knocked down Patatas and said “Well that’s the cat, obviously.” And then mentioned that some breeds of cats have bells in the them. Even in the thick of stressfully knocking stuff onto his head, Andy can still pluck lies out of thin air.

- Well, I assumed Andy was isolated because he’d be the only person to ring every bell. Good to see Baba and Jack did it too. So does that mean the two women are the only ones smart enough to work out the trick before pulling on ropes? Or at least, before pulling on every single rope?

- Oh shit, I was joking about ringing the doorbell. I mean, sort of joking. I would genuinely try that if I were them, but I didn’t think someone actually would, or that it would work. It appears that it did, though. And in fact, that going inside and finding a bell wasn’t some clever workaround, it was the entire point. They got there eventually.

- I was thinking Emma was pretty clever for backing up, to try to see the top of the rope area without looking up (though obviously it would make more sense to back up into the driveway, where you can go as far as you want, rather than backing up into the house, where you’ll get blocked by the ceiling). Then she started explaining to Alex that what she’s doing is like when you zoom in a camera, except that in real life you have to do it with your whole body. And suddenly I was less impressed by her intelligence. I feel like that is a good metaphor for Emma’s performance in this entire season.

- Actually, Rosie has a good idea too. That would work if there are any bells there, just shaking the rope.

- Oh, and Emma has figured out that she can back up into places besides the front hallway. She actually looks very Clouseau-like in this task, when she was shuffling sideways in the house, and then standing on a chair and squinting, convinced this trick would work.

- Oh, and Rosie’s got it! The doorbell strikes again. Obviously. It’s right behind them.

- Emma Sidi: I’m just zooming out again.

Alex Horne: Okay. Don’t fall off the chair.

This is basically a Pink Panther sketch.

- There is no more Clouseau-like way to do a task, than to run around standing on chairs and squinting while convinced that if you manage to stand at just the right angle you’ll crack the case, and then, while trying to set up for your next angle in this stupid idea, you accidentally trip over the object you needed, pick it up, ring it, and accidentally succeed. Well done, Emma. Doing your costume proud.

- Emma jumping in to defend Rosie in the studio. “That is a good idea, though, isn’t it?” She’s right, it was a good idea. Emma Sidi/Rosie Jones dream team. Give them a sitcom. Or just a show where they chat to each other.

- And then she calls Andy a thousand years old, under her breath. I don’t fully know why Emma keeps applying her weirdly intense studio manner to solidarity with Rosie and animosity with Andy. But it’s really funny. One of the best things about this season.

- Oh, hot dog! Rosie in the hot dog! Is she going to win by cheating like Babatunde did when he was a hot dog? Let’s find out.

- Solid title drop out of Rosie there. Probably the best title drop of the season.

- Babatunde’s right. Being dressed up (sort of) as an old time-y ship captain does suit Andy Zaltzman. It’s amazing how many costumes suit Andy Zaltzman, as we’re learning.

- Task instructions: You must lie throughout the next task.

Andy Zaltzman: Born to do it.

Fuck yes! Fuck yes, giving Andy Zaltzman a special solo task that just tells him to lie. Alex, don’t you know that’s his specialty? That would be like having Adam Hills on Taskmaster and setting a task called “remove your leg and throw it into a tree.” That’s how big an advantage Andy has over anyone else in the art of lying.

- Ooh I love the way the lying task started when they entered the room. Technically, Jack nodded when Rosie said she was dressed as a hot dog. And she was dressed as a hot dog. That’s telling the truth, knock a point off Jack and Rosie.

- I actually really like the lying idea. I see how it messes with this task in particular, but it’s a good idea on its own. I think it might be funnier if they’d implemented it in some other task, where the whole thing doesn’t depend on them conveying accurate information, they just have to complete something while remembering not to tell the truth.

- Holy shit. Emma figuring out that Andy is lying, standing up, eyes shining with excitement as she expresses it, is up there for most adorable things I’ve seen on Taskmaster. So excited. So unnecessarily intense. Worked it out because of course Andy Zaltzman knows what velvet is. Cut through the animosity, and of course this man knows what velvet is! I take back what I said in the previous point; this was a great task for applying the lying rule, just for that moment.

- I think Andy broke a rule there, by speaking even though Alex hasn’t asked him a question. But surely they have to let that go, for how good a moment it is for Andy to say “The end of the world isn’t coming” in a task where he’s not allowed to tell the truth. Meaning technically, they could have a debate in the studio about whether to dock them points, and they get to keep their points if the end of the world is, in fact, coming.

- Very funny to watch Emma and Babatunde struggle while Andy’s helpless to do anything for them. Mostly Emma, really. It was funny when Emma got “lemons a five-pound note”, Alex said they were “half right”, and Baba jumped in with the excited voice of a man who’s just realized he could finally contribute something, that maybe it’s 2 pounds 50. Which doesn’t even work, because if 5 pounds were half right, that would be ten pounds.

- I can’t believe they actually got one lemon and a 5-pound note within under 40 minutes. I don’t think I could do that, even without the lying. That’s a really hard one. There was a tiny hint from Alex, when Emma kept guessing books, and Alex asked Andy if there were numbers in there, I guess to guide Emma more toward the right answer, possibly because they had to get out of that room eventually. But it wasn’t much of a hint. That was brilliant work by Emma.

- Not a single truth by Andy Zaltzman. Fuck yes, that’s how it’s done. He’s been training for this his whole career.

- Well first of all, the task said to only make silent facial expressions unless answering Alex’s question, and Jack is doing little giggles. Andy broke that rule maybe once, and it was to say something funny enough to justify it. Jack’s breaking it right off the bat.

- Okay, what the fuck? I was joking before, about Rosie Jones winning by cheating while wearing the hot dog, the way Babatunde did. But that was absolutely blatant. Jack Dee made noises all the way through that, when rules specified silent expressions. He also told the truth repeatedly to Rosie. He made a cursory effort to lie when Alex asked him questions, but all of his expressions – and his noises – that he directed at Rosie were truthful. Absolute bullshit. Arguably Jack and Rosie should be down like 50 points, one for every correct facial expression he made. Obviously you can’t do that, but at least that should be no points for this task. I will be genuinely annoyed if they win this, especially did Emma did so brilliantly to work it out by not cheating.

- Oh good, we’ve returned to the studio and Greg has immediately pointed out that Jack was “openly talking” and also not lying. Glad we’re at least discussing this one, unlike Baba running. They’d better not get points for this. Not fair to Rosie since it’s not her fault, but, you know, that’s what you get if you have so much faith in Jack Dee that you wear the hot dog for a team task because you think he’ll get you the double points.

- Emma, for the entire season: Unquestionably supportive of Rosie Jones, always jumping to her defence in the studio and charmed by her jokes.

Emma, as soon as they point out that Rosie's negative three points should maybe get doubled to negative six:

Hilarious. They are being generous as I think Jack told the truth every time Rosie made a guess, but they can't actually dock that many points, so I would accept three points docked, due to truth telling, and no points gained for completing the task, due to cheating.

- And that's what they got. Fair enough. I'd have been genuinely, honestly upset if Jack got away with that just because he's Alex's favourite.

- Technically, they could put the fortune cookies in a Ziploc bag before dropping them into the bowls of hot sauce, salty water, vinegar, whatever else. The fortunate cookies are still in a bowl. And they don't have to eat vinegar.

- Interesting idea, to shoot and edit Rosie and Baba's attempts at this task like it's a Saw-style, torture-based horror film (I've not actually seen the Saw films, but I assume that's exactly what happens in them, right?). This reminds me of the final filmed task of season 9, when Rose opened all the tasks in the correct order and it was easy, and then we see everyone else get the order wrong and it was torture. This one seems to be very much luck of the draw, which ones you open first.

- Ah, Jack's come up with an even more obvious solution than the Ziploc bag. Just don't put them in the bowl at the end.

- I would definitely go with covering one eye with my hand, rather than trying to wink continuously for the rest of the task.

- I enjoyed that Emma looked genuinely annoyed when they got back to the studio, and Greg said he's allow Jack's hot sauce avoidance trick. I think that one's fair enough, the task didn't say they have to obey the cookies in the order in which they opened them.

- Right, I wrote the above point before watching the beginning of Andy's task attempt, in which he says that right away, that he can save some for last.

Alex Horne: I think you have to do them in the order you open them.

Andy Zaltzman: [picks up the task, reread it, calmly put it down] No, you do not.

You tell him, Andy! All the information is on the motherfucking task!

God, I love pedant. I'm such a massive fan of pedants. You're the best, Andy. (I am reminded of an old Andy Zaltzman joke here: "Nobody likes a pedant. Well, actually, I guess it's not true to say that nobody likes a pedant...)

- Holy fuck. I am genuinely glad that my roommate is not home right now, because the volume of my gasp would have caused concern. That might be the loudest I have ever gasped while watching comedy. I've only heard the first couple of seconds of Andy's phone call so I don't know how far they get, but I know that voice. I am not usually great at recognizing voices, but I know that voice incredibly well. In the last few years, I have spent more hundreds of hours listening to that voice, in the last few years, than I have spent listening to my own mother's voice.

Guys. Guys. Guys. It's happened. Against his will - very much against his will - Daniel Kitson is on Taskmaster. And people thought it would never happen! Well it has! Daniel Kitson's on Taskmaster.

Technically this is Chocolate Milk Gang content. I'm going to be a pedant about it, which I am, I would have to cut out this clip and put it in my Chocolate Milk Gang folder. Oh my God guys.

- Having seen the rest of that phone call, I feel compelled to post this audio clip. It's from Daniel Kitson's 2007 stand-up show, It's the Fireworks Talking (brilliant and available on Bandcamp), in which he lists the friends he has at the time, and how he knows they're his friends.

He is, of course, referring to John Oliver, Russell Howard, Gavin Osborn, and Alun Cochrane. Andy didn't make the cut at the time, despite being in the Chocolate Milk Gang. But Kitson did explain, in that clip, that you know someone's your real friend if you can call them up to tell them about your genitals, and you won't need to give them further explanation about it. Does this mean that Andy is now on the "real friends" list, but the criteria has changed, in their older and wiser age/stage of life, to be that you can call someone up to say you're in the bath, and not need to give further explanation?

Food for thought. I'm going to be honest, I am so stuck on how cool it is that Kitson was on Taskmaster, I barely care what else happens in this episode now.

Also, it should be noted for the record that while this is the first appearance of Daniel Kitson on Taskmaster, it is not the first reference to him. That was back in season 1:

- Oh, Andy was doing so well until he got the "start all over" one. So well. Telling Alex off. Phoning the greatest comic mind of his generation. Not keeping his mouth open because he didn't have to.

- Every other person interpreted "shout the word yes for thirty seconds" as "say yes over and over". Not Andy. I think he actually believed he'd be able to sustain saying one word "yes" for thirty entire seconds.

- I'm going to be clipping several things from this episode. I want that phone call for my Chocolate Milk Gang folder. And I want the audio of Andy Zaltzman shouting "yes" for as long as possible to be the alarm that wakes me up in the morning. I'm like 40% kidding about that.

- Overall scores are getting closer. Going into this season, Andy Zaltzman was my favourite, but not my pick to win; I expected him to be langishing in last place by this point. Instead, he's tied for second, only six points behind first place. There's a lot of ground to make up, but he still has the hot dog in his pocket. And so does Emma. Emma actually was my pick to win, going into the season, I'd be very happy with either her or Andy winning. And very annoyed if Jack wins.

- It's been impressive how so far, for the vast majority of the season, they've had tasks that have worked just fine for Rosie Jones, to the point where normally I barely remember that there are major physical things the others can do and she can't. But this task... might have been made without taking the disability into account. It is funny, though. Pretty sure that's how Rosie wants it, just throw her into stuff with everyone else (when it comes to made-up points that don't matter, while giving her accommodation for things that actually do matter, like being able to sit on her chair comfortably).

- And the first few turns of that task bear out my view of it, but luckily, sitting on the elimination bench just gives Rosie more chances to talk shit to Jack Dee. Which has been great fun all episode.

- Yes! Jackie's also out on the first turn, Andy with a shot at five points. This could really narrow the gap in the overall scores. I hadn't gotten all that far into being competitive in this season, I guess because my favourite did not seem likely to win. But now that I see where we are with three episodes (and one live task) to go, and Andy's in with an actual chance - suddenly I am quite invested in the scores.

If Andy wins, we get him on Champion of Champions III. But I think I am almost more excited about the fact that if Andy wins, we get him on the podcast for the final episode. He was so fucking funny in his Taskmaster podcast episode, I want another one of those.

- Andy checks the wind like it's cricket. I've just realized there has been no explanation for the Roman costume, and in fact, it's barely been referenced all episode. He's just Like That.

- Fuck yes! You go, Andy! Both beanbags, perfectly calibrated!

- And Baba's out! Hell yes, Andy, you weird fucking Roman warrior!

- And another episode win for Emma Sidi! She reminds me of her buddy Rose Matafeo, wearing that hat.

- God, was that ever fun. This is a fucking amazing season. Obviously I'm biased because my all-time number one Taskmaster wishlist contestant is on it, but I think this season is amazing even without my bias.

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deandoesthingstome · 10 months ago

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Get to know me!

@itbmojojoejo I'm with you on the "starting a new post for these things" thing. So even though yours wasn't long, that's just how I'm rolling lately. So here's another get-to-know-me game!

Nickname: As an adult, no one doesn't call me by my given name, unless you count on Tumblr. Which, to be fair, is the name I gave. So nothing now. But as a kid, it was Bear.

Sign: Sagittarius baby!!!

Height: 5'5.5"

The last thing I googled: sexy 70's disco fashion. For reasons.

Amount of sleep: Fitbit says between 7 and 8 per night usually. But sometimes it's like 4. IDK. Never enough.

Dream job: I just had coffee with a friend this morning and chatted about this very topic. When I was younger I wanted to be a marine biologist, but these days I don't know what I want to be doing when I grow up. I know it isn't what I became.

Favorite song: I hate this question. But Sunrise by Simply Red is on constant repeat these days.

Movie/Book that summarizes me: I also hate this question. I have a feeling it's probably whatever the most mundane day-to-day story you've read or seen is.

Favorite instrument: Have I ever told you how much I love drum and bugle corps? So that's actually two (or more because all the different kinds of drum and brass, but IDK. The sound thrills me!)

Aesthetic: Comfy, cozy. Give me a blanket.

Favorite authors: Since I don't seem to actually read books anymore, I'll go with a few I used to love immensely. Jorge Luis Borges, John Barth, Steven King

Random fun fact: I'm a certified yoga instructor. whoops!

No pressure tags and fun only! @kittenofdoomage @raccoon-eyed-rebel @mayloma @geralts-yenn @dadralt @littlefreya @sillyrabbit81

#tag games #get to know me #sorry i'm off work today and killing time

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thosekillerheels · 2 months ago

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First, please don’t feel you have read this whole thing-it’s a stream of consciousness love letter. Dearest, dearest, dearest To Venus And Back💗 you are my second favorite Tori record, and my only “ all purpose” one, meaning I don’t have to be in a particular mood, I just push play and float in your interplanetary glow. If I had to describe you in one word, it would be LUSCIOUS. I’ll never forget Tori describing Venus on VH1 Women First as “a bleeding watercolor coning out of your speakers.” Listening this morning, I was taken aback by the perfection of every note, every breath, every sound. So I’m doing things differently this time-going song by song to luxuriate in your beauty.

-Bliss-the last cassette I bought “in real time.” Your dark, mysterious tone, your driving intensity of the last, repeated chorus, the timbre and tone of Tori’s voice (here and throughout the record), the “weird Tori-“ness of the verses, the “I said”’s. So freaking good

-Juarez-Bliss is fantastic, but it was when I heard Juarez for the first time, I KNEW this record would be thebomb.com. Only T could make just 3 piano notes so haunting and effective. The percussion, the “rubber band” twanging sound (obsessed) the background harmony, the lyrics, the breathy vocals and the way they trail off at the end of some of the lines. I always envision a purple desert(all the songs are purple. The songs and the album art mirror each other completely)

-Concertina-so light and airy, with some slightly jagged edges from guitar

-Glory Of The 80’s-it always tickles me that there’s HARPSICHORD in the very beginning. Another thing only T could do, make harpsi work in a song set in space. “Orbiting around”,always reminds me of Black Dove for some reason. Yaaaas Bugle Boy Models, Silicon Party Barbies, drag kings called Venus, and “karma drawn up in lines”-a nod to the prevalence of coke during the decadent decade! And yes, I bought The Story of O (in the wild at a used book store) because of this song

-Lust- my sweet, sweet, girl. You’re absolutely “one of my best friends out of all the songs,” and one of my most used phone alarms. Beautiful, ethereal lyrics, and a piano refrain that, like the slithery keyboard of Riot Poof’s chorus, never, ever, ever loses her shine. I listened to this song a lot when I was homesick at college. Love, love, love. She lives inside my bones

-Suede-subterranean, dark, purple and dull glowing green like electronic lights. The Pay Per View performance is my JAM. “Swallow her whole star intact-I mean!!

-Josephine-Such a dear heart. I love the stripped down recording against sparkling mental images of Paris at night, looking out over the city. And “empty like the Tuileries” always carries extra poignance as an illusionto Tori’s miscarriages

-Riot Poof- MY GIRL! sensual, reptilian, warm, a GROOVE. Another song where I love all the sounds. The chorus has been my ringtone since 2008. A VIBE.

-Datura-I mean!!! Epic in every sense of the word, withThe epitome of lusciousness. The Dionysian, ancient vibe of the the first part, with a pagan veneration of nature herself, flower by flower. The flowers of Tori’s garden in Florida at the time and a real moment for anyone like me who loves Tori’s speaking voice. Then “is there room in my heart…” I alway visualize flying through dark space among the stars. The zinging/shooting star sound is one of my favorite sounds on the whole album. Obsessed. Then we float out even further to the “Dividing Canaan” part-when the percussion, especially the cymbals, becomes a intergalactic ocean where we swim, and swim, and swim. The first time I listened to this song, I thought a new song had started, and was confused. Later during that time, “Dividing Canaan” became a vehicle for me for meditative, centering practice. I would balance a book on my head and focus my attention in a meditative gaze. I remember specifically using the book Naked Lunch, I think just because it was around

-Spring Haze-more amazing percussion. More purple land and skyscapes. I’ve always loved the slightly melancholy mood of this song, and the rhythmic interplay of the vocals, drums, and piano is a great example of the sonically detailed layering on the entire album-you really have to listen to SH to hear everything-like Datura, Riot Poof, GOT80’s, and Juarez. The deepening ocean is warm and lulling

-1,000 Oceans- Simple yet beautiful, the only landscape (Salisbury Hill) that evokes the color green. The piano mimics calm ocean waves. Another comfort song of love and protection

-Zero Point-This girl!! Another epic, another visit to a now apocalyptic Paris. I believe T made the right choice putting Datura on the record. I love how Zero Point was such a mystery for so long though. Datura and Zero Point are intrinsically connected because their “format” is exacttge same, and yet they are completely unique in themselves. I really took the litany at the end into my spirit and my identity when ZP first came out, and like Lust, she’s in my bones. I think a lot about the power of the ancient, universal, leaning feminine force the narrator has ascended into-she has access to the Om, the Vatican Library, and other “places”where sacred/secret knowledge of the universe and the self without Ego can be found for those who are dedicated to a spiritual quest of self and universal knowledge. Years ago, someone was collecting essays for a book about different things Tori. Zero Point/secret knowledge, involving the Mayans, Buddhism, and other shit. So, an exploration of a facet of The Divine Feminine. The project fell through, but I read a lot and researched, and I still have all those notes. Maybe I should restart that project for my own academic curiosity and achievement.

I think it took me about 2 hours to write this. This album lives behind me heart, a place Tori talked about while promoting the album. I love, love, love her. Happy Birthday, love; I’ll go anywhere with you(and back) always and forever 💜💜💜💜

#album anniversary #to venus and back #tvab #21 september 1999 #juarez #riot poof #spring haze #lust #datura #bliss #zero point

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thesinglesjukebox · 1 month ago

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FKA TWIGS - "EUSEXUA"

youtube

Forever 'til the end of time...

[7.70]

Ian Mathers: First part: I do wish more pop music sounded like its makers had heard "Windowlicker" at least once, yeah. Second part: why does it suddenly feel like we're freefalling without a parachute? Third part: you know what, they should have gone with "braindance" back in the day. [8]

Grace Robins-Somerville: Everyone should burn down their place of work and host a rave inside its charred shell. This song is so fucking good. Twigs can do whatever she wants forever. [9]

Will Adams: The office choreo clip that kept bouncing around my timeline upon the video's release was a fake-out; the stuttering boom-boom beat in the prelude is a separate song entirely, "Drums of Death." "Eusexua" proper is breathtaking in the way the best trance music is: strobing, nervous, euphoric all at once. The titular concept would seem overwrought were it not explicated as flawlessly as Twigs does here. Her voice is suspended in mid-air as the track swirls around her, until everything falls away and she is lifted to that higher state. [9]

Jel Bugle: It’s ponderous, and I had to google what "eusexua" is: "a state of being" and "the pinnacle of human experience." I didn’t really get to the summit of human experience with this one – it’s kinda Perrie Edwards x Yeule, and I feel this leaves a sort of electronic slop. Maybe it’s the kind of thing that gets played in a club, rather than on a cold drizzly afternoon, The last 40 seconds are good, where it’s more disjointed and ethereal. That should have been the whole song. [5]

Katherine St. Asaph: Putting my editor's cap on: Twigs used 167 words to describe the indescribable "eusexua" when one word existed and would suffice, "ecstasy." Zero words, even, would suffice: the last part of this song. [8]

Mark Sinker: Listening to this engenders a state of being and the description of that state of being is: pleasant! In a somewhat nervous and spooky way! It’s not really a new state of being though, because I’ve heard other songs by FKA Twigs. It seems a vaguely needless pressure for everyone to invent a whole new word for it. [7]

Taylor Alatorre: FKA Twigs is bad at naming things, including herself, but this is known. The syllables comprising "Eusexua" are an obstacle of her own making, which is apt for a song that portrays its (unfortunately) titular feeling as a state that must be fought and clawed for, even against one's better judgment. As depicted, the ascent to transcendence is a rather bumpy one, speckled with earthly crevices and frictions -- those chittering little clacks against the temple are what deny us an early exit from crass materiality. Twigs dances around her definitions because she knows that, despite what she says at one point, to transcribe would only tether her down further. She trusts in her voice, and its wide range of contortions, to do the real semantic lifting, and the trust pays itself back. Our reward for following her on this ersatz Eightfold Path is a guiltless surrender to the simple joys of trance, not in scare quotes but in full hands-up glory. It can't last forever, of course, but just long enough to have made the journey worth it under any name. [7]

Jacob Sujin Kuppermann: Maybe my standards are too high for her — at this point, I expect masterworks from Twigs every time, songs that will stop you in your tracks through novel stylistic choices or sheer emotive weight. "Eusexua" is instead merely a case of well-executed contemporary sophistipop, hitting all of the right semi-nostalgic synth tones and rhythms to feel like a moment of ecstasy on the dancefloor. Even when it slows down I don't get any more out of it; she phones it in a little, which is to say she does better than most working pop musicians. [7]

Nortey Dowuona: I already felt constantly alone. It's my own damn fault. I'm getting older, so it's my job to fix it. That is when you reach eusexua. You finally hit the end of your excuses, rationalizations, punching up and down and delusions, and you swim free into your own eusexua. Fear is a common process -- it happens often when others are trying to drown you with their own despair -- but fear not; eusexua is here for them too. Look past yourself to see the despair and regret you constantly feel just for existing reflected in another's eyes; pull them too into eusexua. Eusexua will be our freedom, our community, our life. You will not have to be rich, you will not have to be handsome, you will be healed of your disabilities and difficulties, you will need no power or gratification, you will become part of us, and be a greater whole that will have you complete and loved. You will finally have help. [10]

Alfred Soto: Putting aside my FKA Twigs skepticism was easy: I'm a sucker for boom-clap stutterbeats. She channels K-pop and Fever Ray for the sake of inhabiting a reasonable facsimile of euphoria. She's always been reasonable. [7]

[Read, comment and vote on The Singles Jukebox]

#fka twigs #eusexua #music #music writing #music reviews #music criticism #the singles jukebox #Youtube

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ajscico · 11 months ago

Note

For the fic writer ask game!

5, 6 and 13

For @nancyheart11 and @majorproblems77

You both asked for 5 and 13 so I combined them.

What fic surprised you with how much interaction it got this past year? The Incident. I didn’t think I’d get so much interaction from kidnapping Silver and Shy’s AU? Or even New Apartment New Landlord. I’m surprised that people outside the popcorn-devouring crowd who watched Silver and Shy bounce reblogs off each other would care about it?

What fic surprised you with how little interaction It got this past year. Either Betrayal? Or Minish Gifts, see below.

So with both most and little interactions—the gifted fics all did and usually do really well. Partially because in gifting them, it brings all the really popular writer’s readers over to read it? The not-gift fics never do as well. I probably need to tag better or something but… that’s effort and brain is more interested in screaming.

Do you have playlists for any of your fics or wips?

I could really use one. I have a Spotify playlist that’s just instrumentals (mostly OSTs and fan-covers) that is nice when I’m writing or in the mood to write. That’s about as close as I can get. Anything by Rozen or TSFH is great.

I do have specific songs tied to things though. I have to pull up Sound the Bugle if I’m trying to work on Town of Traitors for example.

youtube

Or Song of Healing (both versions) ended up happening because I listened to that one cover on repeat.

youtube

Lullaby for a Hero and Wild Heart both do fun things bouncing around my brain, maybe I should find fics for those when I can get the creative juices back for more potential fics?

youtube

What fic are you most excited to post in the coming year?

I want to publish at least one of my long projects. Either Twilight/Abandonment (really should officially rename it), Town of Traitors or Puppet Lullaby. One of them is all. More would be fantastic.

Bleh, sorry for the ramble. It’s a good thing I have mother-daughter date tonight. Self-care boost is needed apparently.

youtube

#asks and answers #nancy dear #lovely major!#ask game

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it-happened-one-fic · 1 year ago

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500 Followers Playlist Starter Pack: The Genshin Impact Version!

Thank you so much!!! As I said in the Twisted Wonderland version of this post, I'm afraid I don't have time to do a full event (Christmas and all that jazz) but I did want to say thank you to everyone. Since I have a habit of listening to music while writing, I used few songs (I aimed for four each but didn't always make it) from my playlists to form sort of a starter pack under the cut! Again, thank you so much!!!

(NOTE: The links go to Youtube. Songs only for characters I have written [though the fic may not yet be posted]!)

Twisted Wonderland Playlist Starter Pack

Venti:

Tubthumping - Chumbawamba (cursing)

Fly Away - TheFatRat & Anjulie

Scalliwag - Gaelic Storm

Run - Jasmine Thompson

Kaeya:

Honey Whiskey - Nothing But Thieves

Skeletons - Dihaj

Night Moves - Lissie

Break The Ice - Britney Spears

Diluc:

Going Crazy - Goo Goo Dolls (cursing)

Natural - Imagine Dragons

I Will Not Bow - Breaking Benjamin

Life After You - Daughtry

Zhongli:

Centuries - Fall Out Boy

House of Memories - Panic At the Disco

Pompeii - Bastille

Yours Forever (Reprise) - Phillipa Soo & Conrad Ricamora (From Over The Moon film)

Xiao:

Ain’t No Mountain High Enough - Diana Ross

Sound the Bugle - Bryan Adams (From Spirit: Stallion of the Cimarron film)

All The King’s Horses - Karmina

My Demons - Starset

Baizhu:

Icarus - Bastille

Cure For Me - AURORA

Die For You - The Weeknd

Kamisato Ayato:

Feeling Good - Michael Buble

Million Dollar Baby - Ava Max

The Greatest - Sia

Arataki Itto:

All Star - Smash Mouth

I Like it, I Love it - Tim McGraw

Let’s Get it Started - Black Eyed Peas

Good Time - Owl City & Carly Rae Jepsen

Thoma

Safe and Sound - Capital Cities

Just the Way You Are - Bruno Mars

Our Song - Taylor Swift

Fallin For You - Colbie Caillat

Kazuha:

I’m Like a Bird - Nelly Furtado

North Star - Tyler Shaw

Butterfly - SMiLE.dk

Mind Over Matter - Young the Giant

Heizou:

Sherlock (CLUE + NOTE) - SHINee

I Think We’re Alone Now - Tiffany

Troublemaker - Olly Murs (feat. Flo Rida)

Alhaitham:

Blow Your Mind (Mwah) - Dua Lipa

(This Ain’t) No Thinkin Thing - Trace Adkins

DJ Gimi-O Habibi Albanian Remix (Slowed and Reverb) - Ricky Rich

4 Minutes - Madonna, Justin Timberlake, & Timbaland

Kaveh:

Treat Her Like a Lady - The Temptations

There Was Sun - Nothing But Thieves

Let’s Stay Together - Al Green

Money, Money, Money - ABBA

Cyno:

Never Give Up - Sia

Arabian Nights - Will Smith (Disney Aladdin 2019)

Desert Rose - Sting & Cheb Mami

Whenever, Wherever - Shakira

Wanderer:

How Far We’ve Come - Matchbox Twenty

17 Crimes - AFI

Please, Don’t Leave me - P!nk

Don’t You (Forget About Me) - Simple Minds

Neuvillette:

Love Story - Indila

Don’t Turn Around - Ace of Base

Here Comes the Rain Again - Eurythmics

Ocean Eyes - Billie Eilish

Wriothesley:

Bones - Imagine Dragons

Warriors - Imagine Dragons

Daydream - The Aces

Animal - Neon Trees

Il Dottore;

Black Sea - Natasha Blume

The Wolf - SIAMES

Everything Black - UNLIKE PLUTO & Mike Taylor

One Hell of a Team - AmaLee & Divide Music

Childe:

Rasputin - Boney M.

Irresistible - Fall Out Boy

Don’t Blame Me - Taylor Swift

Hold Me Like a Grudge - Fall Out Boy

Dainsleif:

You and I - PVRIS

Never Really Over - Katy Perry

Die For You - Starset

Willow - Jasmine Thompson

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rubykgrant · 6 months ago

Note

If all of the Reds and Blues and Freelancers played instruments, what do you think they'd all play? All I can think of is Doc/O'Malley on violin (probably gets really into it like Devil Went Down To Georgia), Sarge on trumpet (cuz bugles but can actually play it nice too), Florida on ukulele, and Maine and Locus taking up classic guitar and cello respectively for therapeutic reasons and ending up getting really into it.

Those all sound really good!

Hmm... it depends on what kind of music they're going for. I think in general, most of them haven't had the chance to really practice much music, but in season 15, we saw some of them formed a band! Carolina sings (so good), and it looked like Grif and Tucker were both on guitar, while Caboose did drums (if I remember right).

Sarge is certainly musically inclined, in regards to how much he likes to make up songs about killing stuff he doesn't like. I'm gonna say he knows how to play guitar, generally classic-rock/folk/country with what he does, but he surprises people by listening to wide range of musical genres (he's got a big collection that includes heavy metal and hip-hop). Oh, and he rocks on the harmonica!

Grif is good with guitar, and he'd probably be good on drums as well, but I'd like to think he secretly hides a gift with piano. Like, he can just naturally do really amazing/complicated pieces with ease (but when he was younger, little jerks he went to school with called that "sissy music", so he was awkward about sharing it with anybody). He's good with a uke too, and a very nice singer (again, if he's not feeling embarrassed)

Simmons WISHES he could play something like the violin or cello... but he just doesn't have rhythm, and gets too frustrated to practice properly. He doesn't have a bad voice, but he's a nervous mess if he tries to sing in front of people. He's able to get decent on the piano (with some help from Grif), and since he's a tech guy, he finds his own niche with electric keyboards (nothing too extravagant, but still very good)

Carolina is the one who had fancy music lessons when she was younger, but she's out of practice (she used to be good on clarinet and violin). She gets back into music and singing, picking up some guitar and piano... but surprises everybody by randomly deciding to get REALLY good at the harp (just to show off, haha)

Doc and O'Malley would certainly learn to play violin and fiddle, but I think they'd also practice different kinds of unique instruments; the kalimba, the tabla, the veena, the dholak, the balafon, and various types of flutes (they both also know how to make small little instruments with woodcraft; various things that Doc knows from his own traditions and heritage). They also are very good singers, Doc being especially into acapella/using voices to simulate instruments (though, O'Malley tends to ham it up for "villain" songs~)

Kai is more into mixing music, creating beats, maybe making something new with samples, and she is a killer DJ (dance music, electronica, techno remixes, and all similar variations. she's pretty good at changing up the "tone" of a song, but still keeping the melody strong)

Church is kinda-sorta good at a few things, but nothing he's invested in/practices often. However, he's pretty good at writing songs when he can focus on it (the Fragments all help, and they have a variety of musical genres they are into)

Tex is also OK with certain instruments, but not especially passionate to play anything often (she can sing though, but is the opposite of Carolina, who tends to lean toward more energetic songs. Tex will sing lower and slower)

Wash learned how to play the recorder in middle school. He can also play a kazoo, and can shake a tambourine on the beat. That's about it... with some help, he's OK on drums (he likes to back-up sing/harmonize with other people rather than sing solo)

Caboose is good on drums, he can put all his energy into making a strong rhythm! He's also good on various horns/brass and woodwinds, and really vibes with free-form jazz

Donut gets more caught-up with performing, he loves two come up with songs, sing and dance. He mostly likes pop-rock, but gets into other genres occasionally (he knows how to play the melodica very well). His big dream is to write a bunch of musicals~

Tucker is very good at different kinds of guitar, and he's a great singer as well (he didn't think he'd be into it, but just for practice, he tries out some classical/opera, and he's actually VERY impressive, he can project his voice very well and change the tone/pitch easily, and so he plays around merging old-school stuff with newer themes of music)

Locus hasn't had time for music in years... but he learned how to play different things as a kid; quena, siku, and some percussion instruments

Lopez can play basically anything he wants. People outside the loop will think it is just because he's a robot, and is therefore "copying" music that is already recorded... but Lopez will combine two completely different instruments and use them together in ways most people couldn't think of (he also leans toward very sappy loves songs, inspired by his adoration for Sheila~)

I don't have too many thoughts for the Freelancers... but if they could have had a different life path, York would probably have done well in a boy band, and South would have been a punk-rock star~

#red vs blue #rvb #ask #answer

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tma-entity-song-poll · 7 months ago

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Battle of the Fear Bands!

B4R1: The Extinction

That Funny Feeling:

"20,000 years of this, 7 more to go"

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London Calling:

“The song is all about the world tearing itself apart through war, famine, and disasters. The sound intensity lends itself to a feeling of danger. At the end of the song, there is a repeating "SOS" (the international distress signal) in Morse code, implying an outgoing call for help at the end of the world.”

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Lyrics below the line!

That Funny Feeling:

I can't really, uh, play the guitar very well Um, or sing, so, you know, apologies

Stunning 8K resolution meditation app In honor of the revolution, it's half-off at the Gap Deadpool's self-awareness, loving parents, harmless fun The backlash to the backlash to the thing that's just begun

There it is again That funny feeling That funny feeling There it is again That funny feeling That funny feeling

The surgeon general's pop-up shop, Robert Iger's face Discount Etsy agitprop, Bugles' take on race Female Colonel Sanders, easy answers, civil war The whole world at your fingеrtips, the ocean at your door The livе-action Lion King, the Pepsi Halftime Show Twenty-thousand years of this, seven more to go Carpool Karaoke, Steve Aoki, Logan Paul A gift shop at the gun range, a mass shooting at the mall

There it is again That funny feeling That funny feeling There it is again That funny feeling That funny feeling

Reading Pornhub's terms of service, going for a drive And obeying all the traffic laws in Grand Theft Auto V Full agoraphobic, losing focus, cover blown A book on getting better hand-delivered by a drone Total disassociation, fully out your mind Googling "derealization," hating what you find That unapparent summer air in early fall The quiet comprehending of the ending of it all

There it is again That funny feeling That funny feeling There it is again That funny feeling That funny feeling

Hey, what can you say? We were overdue But it'll be over soon You wait Hey, what can you say? We were overdue But it'll be over soon Just wait Ba-da-da, ba-da-da, ba-da-da-da-da-da-da Hey, what can you say? We were overdue But it'll be over soon You wait Ba-da-da, ba-da-da, ba-da-da-da-da-da-da Hey, what can you say? We were overdue, oh But it'll be over soon You wait Ba-da-da, ba-da-da, ba-da Hey, what can you say? We were overdue But it'll be over soon You wait Ba-da-da, ba-da-da, ba-da-da-da-da-da-da

London Calling:

London calling to the faraway towns Now war is declared, and battle come down London calling to the underworld Come outta the cupboard, ya boys and girls

London calling, now don't look to us Phony Beatlemania has bitten the dust London calling, see we ain't got no swing Except for the ring of that truncheon thing

The ice age is coming, the sun's zoomin' in Meltdown expected, the wheat is growin' thin Engines stop running, but I have no fear 'Cause London is drownin', and I live by the river

(London calling) to the imitation zone Forget it, brother, you can go it alone London calling to the zombies of death Quit holdin' out and draw another breath

London calling, and I don't wanna shout But while we were talking, I saw you noddin' out London calling, see we ain't got no Hyde 'Cept for that one with the yellowy eyes

The ice age is coming, the sun's zoomin' in Engines stop running, the wheat is growin' thin A nuclear error, but I have no fear 'Cause London is drowning, and I, I live by the river

The ice age is coming, the sun's zoomin' in Engines stop running, the wheat is growin' thin A nuclear error, but I have no fear 'Cause London is drowning, an' I, I live by the river

Ooh, ooh, ooh, ooh Ooh, ooh, ooh Now get this

(London calling) Yes, I was there, too And ya know what they said? Well, some of it was true (London calling) At the top of the dial And after all this, won't you give me a smile? (London calling)

I never felt so much alike, alike, alike

#the magnus archives #tma #poll #the extinction #Youtube

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mornyavie · 8 months ago

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🎶✨when u get this, list 5 songs u like to listen to, publish. then, send this ask to 10 of your favourite followers (positivity is cool)🎶✨

Hello!

I probably won't do 10, that's a pretty significant fraction of my follower count, let alone the active ones! But I'll send a couple around and see if anyone wants to respond.

Only five... hmmm...

I'm not going to make any pretensions that this is a list of favorite; I'm just going to choose some songs that I think I can say something about, or whatnot.

Like all self-respecting mid-2000s Horse Kids, I was really into Spirit: Stallion of the Cimarron. I used Sound the Bugle by Bryan Adams as a sort of theme song for a character I played in a Call of Cthulhu campaign a few years ago, who was a disaffected WWI vet.

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On a completely different note, I have to include some Daniel Kahn & The Painted Bird. He does awesome klezmer with heavy influence from jewish and labor history. Rosen Auf Den Weg Gestreut is particularly good, though you could go for Arbeter Froyen or March of the Jobless Corps if you're looking for something lighter in tone.

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On a completely different note, everyone should listen to Mareridt by Myrkur. What's that? You aren't really a black metal person? Too bad.

[warning for minor examples of music-video-typical flashing/jump cuts on this one]

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Let's jump across the sea to The Halluci Nation (formerly A Tribe Called Red). "Like listening to" is a great description of this band. Their songs are fun as all get-out, hard to sit still to.

[minor flashing/jump-cutting in this one as well]

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Hmm, last one... let's grab some Steam Powered Giraffe. They're a group of performance artists who perform in robot personas. I'm particularly fond of Fire Fire.

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I'm a big music person, honestly, so if you want to ask more about specific bands or genres, please do!

#music #videos #about me #I feel vaguely like I should have used this to promo more obscure artists....#if you interact with this post I will consider that permission to send you the ask meme

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c-40 · 9 months ago

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A-T-4 042 Art Of Versions

The Art of Noise follow the Into Battle EP with Beat Box. As you've probably guessed from previous ZTT and AON posts releasing many different edits and versions was their m.o. The image (I got at least) was the technology (most noticeably the Fairlight) and time in the studio gave you the ability to churn out endless variations (AON released at least 11 'diversions' of Beat Box). It was great advertising for Trevor Horn as he and his partner owned one of the most sophisticated recording studios on the planet at the time. It's easy to see similarities with Jamaican producers and studios that in the previous decade created dubs and versions, although the closest AON got to producing a riddim would be Moments In Love which has been covered, remixed, and sampled a lot a lot. We have had pop music factory production lines before and I suppose this is where Trevor Horn crosses over with his contemporary Pete Waterman, according to Phil Harding "Waterman watched Trevor Horn so closely that he would strike a deal with equipment suppliers to furnish him with whatever state-of-the-art gadgetry Horn had." Before his hit factory had been established Waterman produced a Relax sound alike track, complete with a look alike sleeve, in 1984 called The Upstroke by Agents Aren't Aeroplanes. Nowadays trap music can be made quickly for very little money and production is more automated and streamlined than it ever has been

Beat Box was the first track AON worked on and it came from JJ Jeczalik messing around with recordings of Yes drummer, Alan White's drums with a Linn drum machine, a Fairlight CMI Series II and Page R (music sequencing software) while Horn was working on the Yes album 90125 (the similarities between the Red + Blue Mix of Owner Of A Lonely Heart and Beat Box are unmistakable). "So JJ was screwing around in the back room and I remember him playing me that 'Beat Box' drum loop and I said 'Jees, that's fantastic, they'll love that in New York.'"

...And they did, Beat Box did very well on the Billboard dance and black music charts in America, reaching number 1 and 10 respectively. Writer Simon Reynold's has written Beat Box was popular with breakdancers in the US, I believe it's still popular with poppin and lockin dads (and granddads)

In June 1984 AON released their debut album Who's Afraid of the Art of Noise? the title a pun on the 1962 play and later film Who's Afraid of Virginia Woolf? which is itself a pun on the song Who's Afraid of the Big Bad Wolf? from the 1933 Walt Disney cartoon The Three Little Pigs... would we call this a meme?

On the album is Close (To The Edit) which would be released as a single in October 1984. There were five different 12" versions of Close (To The Edit) released, including a picture disk. As far as I can tell AON put out six different versions of the track at the time, including the LP version (that's if I ignore the cassette single). To make matters more confusing Close (To The Edit) evolved out of the afore mentioned Beat Box. Beat Box Diversion Two is a version of Close (To The Edit) and vice versa, as are Diversion Seven and Diversion Eight. Close (To The Edit) was named after the Yes album Close To The Edge and they had fun with the names of the various versions of Close (To The Edit) that they put out, Close-Up, Closer, Closest, Closely Closely (Enough's Enough), Closed

Close (To The Edit) features Anne Dudley playing a very familiar sounding walking bass on piano, if we ignore the car ignition sounds they also use a sample of Boogie Woogie Bugle Boy by The Andrews Sisters. I wondering if this comes from the Duck Rock sessions the then unnamed AON did with Malcom McLaren? I'm thinking Buffalo Gals is taken from a song reference in It's A Wonderful Life, that film was made in 1946 when boogie woogie was the sound. It's either that or they love boogie woogie and swing. AON do love film genre recordings Peter Gunn, Dragnet, James Bond, Robinson Crusoe...

There's another diversion on the Close (To The Edit) singles, a track called A Time To Hear (Who's Listening). Of course there's a few versions, Who's Listening goes into Beat Box and then Close (To The Edit), as does the version called A Time To Clear (It Up) ("all together now") - there's very little difference between these tracks, then there's A Time To Hear (We're Listening) which is the first minute and a half of A Time To Hear (Who's Listening) - the variations of names is more fun the tracks themselves when there's very little to tell them apart... unless the lesson is to accept being resold more of the same stuff in a slightly different package and disappointment

Oh and all these records have come out and Marley Marl still hasn't sampled a drum beat

Art Of Noise - Beat Box Live on the Tube in 1984

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Art Of Noise - A Time To Hear (We're Listening)

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Art Of Noise - Closely Closely, Enough's Enough

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12 versions of Beat Box personally I can see more appearing in time, that's what RSD is for

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#1984 #art of noise #synth pop #hip hop #london #england #uk #80s music #ztt

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tellthemeerkatsitsfine · 3 months ago

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I have some previous posts that were about some other stuff that explain why I'm now going through my folder of Bugle clips I've saved for one reason or another, but these have nothing to do with those initial reasons, I've just found them and wanted to post them again.

First of all, am I the only person who finds myself frequently remembering the famous "confusing facts with emus" line, but forgetting its context? I feel like it's a famous line - is that wrong? I don't know why I think that, if I really have seen other Bugle fans reference it or if I just decided it was an iconic moment. But I remember the first time I heard that line, 81 episodes into the podcast, and thinking - this is the Zaltzman and Oliver sense of humour, distilled. It's also a joke that's equal parts Zaltzman-type humour as Oliver-type humour, even though it was just John who said it.

So now, when I'm going about my business in the real world, if the concept of "facts" comes up, I frequently find myself thinking - though not saying out loud - "You are once again confusing facts with emus." But when I remember that line, I don't usually think of the context that was around it:

And I also came across this post again, which I have definitely posted at least a couple of times before, but I'm sorry, I need to do it again. And I need to again tell my story, that I know something about this song!

Okay, okay, here's the thing about this song. And I've known this since long before I listened to The Bugle. I used to be really into following country music blogs - actual country music. Blogs by people who, like me, were fans of country music and significant anti-fans of pop music incorrectly marketing itself and country. The same way I feel about "professional wrestling". If you want to make entertainment that I don't enjoy for people who aren't me, then fine, whatever, go ahead and do that. But don't give it the same name as a thing I do like, especially if your thing is going to have far more broad mass appeal, to the point where it'll become the first thing most people think of when they hear that name. Leaving me saying "I like [thing] - no, no, not the commercialized manufactured bullshit that's also called [name of thing] and was was your first thought when I mentioned it, I mean the actual [thing]. Why the fuck do I have to clarify that? Why can't the people who make a completely different thing just give their thing a different name?"

Anyway. I hate "pop country" music quite a lot, far more than I hate other music that I'm just not into, but that doesn't call itself by the same name as music I am into. And I used to be really into blogs by other people who felt the same way.

I learned from those blogs about Jamey Johnson, the singer who put out a country album - an actual country album - that was very good, they thought. Or at least, it seemed good. It sounded good. It sounded like country music, and it sounded like good music. However, it was financed with the money that Jamey Johnson had made by co-writing a song called Honky Tonk Badonkadonk, and selling that song to Trace Adkins.

There was actually a huge debate in the country music blogs at the time, around 2006, and then again in 2008 when he released another album. Everyone asking - can we trust this guy? How could we trust this guy? He must be lying to us, claiming to be into country music. A spy, a traitor. I remember reading blog posts that would pick apart his lovely, quite traditional country songs, pointing out anything that could be read as secret signs of pop-country influence, to prove he was lying.

By the time he released his third album of lovely, proper country music, the controversy had mostly died down, and most people accepted him as a country singer. He did what he had to do. He wrote one shit song in 2005, and that gave him the freedom to make good stuff without worrying about money. Honestly, I'm surprised you don't see that sort of thing more often. I'm surprised I even associate this story in particular with Jamey Johnson, rather than it being so common that I don't even have any one name especially associated with the concept of people who write awful "pop country" songs so they can make good country albums. I'd probably do it, if I had that kind of talent.

Jamey Johnson is an absolutely beautiful singer and songwriter. The song Honky Tonk Badonkadonk was written by a guy who also wrote this:

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He also wrote this, which have lyrics that go into the issues with commercialism and the tension between going along with it when he had to before ultimately rejecting it:

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So that's the thing I know about Honky Tonk Badonkadonk. It actually caused a huge schism in country music blogs in 2006, with people disagreeing about whether they should accept Jamey Johnson as a legitimate country singer despite his previous resume. And I, as a teenager reading them all, was firmly on the side of "we can't hold a grudge against someone who did what he had to do to get this done, especially as that is far from the worst moral compromise I've ever seen someone make in purist of a greater goal." He made enough money to afford to make less commercially successful music. And then wrote several songs, including the two I posted above, explaining why he needed to do that.

Anyway, Honky Tonk Badonkadonk then became a running joke on The Bugle, starting in the audio clip I posted above from the last episode of 2009, but they continued to reference it for years. The frequently referred to it as being "by Trace Adkins", and never mentioned that Trace Adkins did not actually write the song. It's fairly silly that that annoys me, because I'm pretty sure Jamey Johnson doesn't want to be credited for that song. But still. The inaccuracy bugs me.

One reference I definitely did not get the first time I heard that Bugle clip is learning that that stupid song went around the Chocolate Milk Gang because Daniel Kitson and Gavin Osborn sent it to Andy Zaltzman, who sent it to John Oliver. All with insufficient information about who wrote it. Come on, guys? Do you really think Trace Adkins would be smart enough to write lyrics like "Lord have mercy, how'd she even get those britches on?/with that honky tonk badonkadonk/now honey you can't blame her for what her mama gave her"? Obviously it took a genius to write that.

#Youtube

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faithfromanewperspective · 1 year ago

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red desert arrangement brainstorm i guess

Heal and replace. Heal and replace. It doesn’t take too long to heal and replace; the demons we’re running from, they’re begging to stay. How do you capture that musically, when I’ve already got the parts all going on, the four-part harmony, the chords and the percussionbass rhythm going on underneath? What do I do when it sounds almost exactly like the first verse? The demons we’re running from, they’re begging to stay. I think I see the problem.

Pop music is notoriously repetitive; orchestral music is not. When you don’t have lyrics that change between lines and verses, when you have 40 or 50 people playing instruments who don’t want to play the exact same thing, on a 4-bar repeat that changes up a couple times depending on the section of the song, you’ve gotta get creative. And can I just say, of all the songs I’ve played covers for or even attempted, I chose this album because from a musical standpoint it’s not boring. It’s no cookie cutter I V vi IV or whatever chord combination with a simple drum beat and repeated melodies. The bridges, at least, of each song, are something else. They were clearly written to be fun to play, rather than easy. I wouldn’t recommend them to a beginner busker. Few people I know will cover 5 seconds of summer, for good reason too. It’s difficult. The chords are unpredictable, for example red desert, focusing on vocal harmonies and using simple melodies to bring them out, has a sneaky E major chord in a B minor piece, G sharps littered around the place that aren’t in the key signature, aren’t always there. It means you’ve gotta look twice before improvising, figure out what bar you’re in, what notes to play. E is the subdominant in a B minor piece, in making it major instead of minor, it’s harder to tell that the piece is in a minor key. It shakes things up a bit. It should make it easier to fill in with something interesting, a countermelody over the verse: should I give it to the flutes maybe, or should I switch some of the parts that people played in the first verse around? I can figure that out later.

In the meantime, note that the other commonly occurring chords in the song are B minor and A minor. This is clever: B melodic minor scale ascending adds a G sharp; and A minor has a G sharp in both its harmonic and ascending melodic versions. As a result, the song works smoothly and feels calming and resolved.

So imagine the creatures in the desert. You’ve got the hot wind blowing red sand over cacti and scraggly brown shrubs, the occasional bunch of desert trees, eucalyptus or acacia or mulga I’m not sure, I haven’t brushed up on my ecology quite that much. For the purpose of this exercise, it doesn’t matter. Imagine a bird flitting above the desert. A little spiky lizard or maybe a spinifex mouse flitting around. Can I write all of their parts, weaving in and out of the melody, so each instrument doesn’t get bored? Can I write the migratory birds that fly overhead in search of water, seeing the same landscape every year, never landing on it? how about the red kangaroo, and the western grey? Is there a brown snake sneaking around the bushes: ominous, how about a minor chord for it. I’ll fit it in the transition from A minor to E major, because the harmonic tone-and-a-half jump between F natural and G sharp, both accidentals in this piece (meaning F is meant to be a sharp and G a natural) gives just the sound I’m after. No one wants to be bitten by a brown snake when you’re miles away from the nearest road, let alone hospital. But the red desert is here to heal our blues. We’re safe. Snakes are scarier than they sound: they don’t actually want to bite you. Their venom is meant for the little prey they can actually swallow—they can’t eat a human. They’re not likely to bite unless they think you’re going to hurt them first.

In the recording, the bugle sounds I gave to the bassoons and brass in the first verse could be these animals peeking out. I can see a scorpion when I listen to it. They’re great for looking at from a middle distance, gorgeous, angry, spiky things. But the spiky grasses and desert leaves you can pluck and take apart for your liking. They’re not overgrazed: ecologically there is no problem with that. Some of them you can even eat, bush tucker, you should try it sometime. Connect with the land. Red, red desert, heal our blues.

These plants are the ‘ooh’s in the second verse in the recording. Lovely and ominous. Yet despite being first in the album, red desert is the last of eleven songs in my arrangement. It’s an album theme: every song has ‘ooh’s in the second verse. Well, at least three of them. I think they can be edited a little to wrap around our desert creatures. And our muse! Who is our muse? I’ll dive deeper for you. Who did we call to leave all their fears at the end of the world with us? Let’s make the little melodies dance around them, using the notes that we discussed. You’re the only one I do this for.

So now I have it. Ideas. Concepts, theories, imaginings, that I can build out of notes that somehow go with what I’ve already done. Do the same with the chorus. I don’t know when I’ll get to it all. But here is the framework. I hope we all learned something today. Had ideas. I know I did. I know this orchestral part is going to be better for it. One day. When I make the ideas a reality.

#red desert #music recs #musician #5sos #5 seconds of summer #silver arranges 5sos #silver arranges CALM

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andiinaraethtash · 1 year ago

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Chapter 27: There’s Not a Road I Know That Leads to Anywhere

Notes:

*sing-song voice* Guess who's back!!! Sorry for the wait, I got sidetracked by real life and then got derailed by a million other projects, because I am incapable of focusing on one fandom at a time. Which is weird, because I used to be a very well-focused individual, and now... Well. Now you get four months between chapters. Sorry. TW: none really, this chapter is just angsty (which chapters aren't at this point) and the beginning section shows grief, but otherwise, it's all good! Chapter title is from Sound the Bugle, by Bryan Adams and Hans Zimmer

He knows he’s not supposed to be out and about, but Xornoth can’t help but be curious. He knows now he is indeed in the Grimlands, but he also knows that none of the rulers he’s interacted with rule here. Given the wizard Gem’s fierce vehemence about involving someone, he would lay even money on the mystery involving that someone, even though he has no evidence. A gut feeling, maybe, or a buried memory.

(Hopefully the former.)

(Probably the latter.)

So he maybe, might have, possibly snuck out of his room in the late evening, just to explore and try to get an idea of why he’s here. His room leads directly into a hallway, and he starts checking the rooms on either side of the hall. A study, a bedroom that looks like only the bed has been used in recent years, another bedroom, a lavatory, another bedroom—this one covered in sheets, dust, and cobwebs—and an open door at the other end of the hall.

There’s light coming from said room, and he can hear the soft murmur of voices, and… and he knows he shouldn’t listen in, but he’s desperate to know what’s going on, he needs to know—

He peeks through the gap at the hinges of the door, and nearly gasps when he sees Gem sitting next to a man he vaguely recognizes. In his memory, the man is bloody, beaten, and broken; now he looks like he’s recovering from starvation. He’s been cleaned up, but there’s something vacant about his eyes that haunts Xornoth in a way he should be used to.

They’re the eyes of a man who knows he is dead, even if his body hasn’t quite gotten there yet.

Biting his lip, Xornoth takes a steadying breath an focuses again on the scene in front of him. Gem is holding fWhip in a way that reminds him of how his mother would hold him, whenever he was sick or hurt or scared. His head is on her shoulder, and her chin is resting on his head, and she’s crying softly.

“Please, fWhip, I know you’re still in there, please just… just wake up,” she’s saying, cradling him as close to her as she can. Next to each other, the resemblance between the two of them is uncanny, and Xornoth knows with a certainty that this is her brother.

No wonder she hates his guts. He did that to her brother, to someone she loves, and if that didn’t just make his conviction that he should be locked up or executed stronger, he didn’t know what would. This right here is proof that he is a monster.

“fWhip?” Gem’s voice is trembling. “Please? Just… wake up. I need you to wake up--”

She cuts herself off, takes a deep, shuddering breath, and starts humming. It’s soft, quiet, and slightly off-key, a lullaby if he had to guess, but Xornoth also knows it’s precious, something not to be shared, a way of grieving that he really shouldn’t be intruding upon. So with the softest footsteps he can manage, he pads away.

He hates it, but the song echoes in his mind, chasing away the screams of those he’s killed.

______

The days pass at a snail’s pace. Xornoth continues to make progress; fWhip doesn’t. Gem tries not to take it too hard, she knows what they went through physically and mentally was different, but it still stings.

Within two days, Xornoth is eating solid foods, is walking around the room without needing any assistance, and his wings have moulted away the blackened feathers; within three he’s starting to ask questions. Thankfully, they’re all safe questions, ones they all feel they can answer, so there’s never been an incident, but she’s waiting for the other shoe to drop.

It’s just Scott, Pearl, Sausage, and her staying in the Grimlands right now. The others have all promised to visit, and so far Katherine and Shrub have kept their word, but the others need time, they need space, they need to process everything that’s happened. Privately, she thinks they’ve had enough time to process, but she keeps that to herself.

Pearl tells her one day when she confesses how she’s feeling, “Yeah, I think you need time to process, too.”

Gem has to stop and think for a moment. Begrudgingly, she has to admit Pearl is right, but she refrains from doing so aloud. Instead, she says, “I’ll process when things go back to normal.”

She gets a disbelieving look in return, and raises her hands defensively, but before she can actually protest, Sausage pokes his head in. “There you are!” He says brightly. “Scott’s looking for you, Gem.”

Gem reluctantly tears her eyes away from Pearl, nods to Sausage, and leaves. Behind her, she hears Pearl start apologising to Sausage for the umpteenth time, and while she knows why, she’s just as tired of having to say it wasn’t her fault as Sausage is. You’d think by know she’d get the picture.

She finds Scott pacing the hall outside the bedrooms. He’s going back and forth between Xornoth’s room, which the other elf still hasn’t left, and fWhip’s room, like he’s trying to decide which one he wants to go into.

“You still haven’t actually seen him, have you?” Gem asks, trying to keep from sounding too exhausted as she gestures to fWhip’s room, and Scott startles before nodding.

“I know he’s alive, and that’s enough to let me sleep at night, but the rest of the time…”

Gem nods, understanding the anxiety of not knowing if he’s improving, of not knowing how bad it really is. “He’ll be okay. I have to believe that.”

Scott huffs out a heavy breath, then turns abruptly to face her. “I’m sorry,” he starts, and when she makes a sound of protest, continues. “If I had secured the crystal better before I left, if I had just gotten a handle on my powers sooner, I could have stopped—”

“Hey,” Gem cuts him off, a little frustrated. She’s tired of people feeling like they have to take the blame for what happened, when really the only person at fault was Xornoth. Well, Exor. Same difference. “We could play the blame game all day, but it won’t lead to anyone getting any better. We need to build each other up, not tear ourselves down.”

Scott hesitates, then sighs and nods. “I think it’s time I take Xornoth home,” he says, and Gem raises an eyebrow.

“You sure he’s ready for that?”

“He thinks he is.”

“But you don’t.”

“I didn’t say that,” Scott protests tiredly, and she gives him a flat look.

“Scott. I’d like to think we’re friends. So I’d also like to think you wouldn’t lie to me, and I’d really like to think you wouldn’t lie to yourself.”

Looking skyward, Scott takes a deep breath, then nods. “Alright, yes, I do think he needs to take more time to recover, but he insists he can do that in Rivendell, where he could very easily be triggered by something.”

“I’m more worried about the people,” Gem counters. “They see you bringing home the elf who killed your parents, and they get worried, scared, panicked—you could easily incite a rebellion or at least a riot if you’re not careful.”

Scott doesn't answer for a moment. “I’m aware,” he says slowly, “So I’m prepared to give him an official pardon, and make a proclamation telling everyone exactly what happened, if that helps. But he deserves a place to call home.”

“I thought the Royal Palace was torn down,” Gem says, tilting her head ever so slightly, and Scott nods.

“It was. He can stay with me.”

Thoroughly unimpressed, Gem makes a face. “You’re forgetting that he doesn’t know you. He doesn’t even know who you are. He might take your invitation the wrong way.”

He probably doesn’t like it, but he does suggest an alternative. “Then he can stay in the village, or maybe in one of the embassies.”

She can’t make him see reason, she realises, and sighs heavily. “Fine. He can stay in the Crystal Cliffs’ embassy. But if anything gets damaged, you’re replacing it.”

Scott smiles slightly. “Alright, Gem. But you know he’s not going to do anything to it. He’s too scared of you.”

Gem blinks, taken aback. He’s scared of her? Why would he be scared of her? She’s just Gem, he’s the monster. He’s the one who tortured and murdered and destroyed; she’s the wizard who’s trying to fix everything he broke.

Scott seems to understand her thoughts, and idly she wonders how he does it. “He’s not the one who did all that, Gem, not anymore. That person died with Exor. Of course he’s scared of you. You hold his life in your hands, and while I don’t think he wants to die, he thinks he deserves it, so really, putting his life in your hands is a risk either way.”

Oh. Oh. She hadn’t thought about it that way. He’s afraid to live but afraid to die. Of course, if she were in his shoes—

The next thought comes out of nowhere. Is that how fWhip feels? He’s done a lot of bad things as Exor’s puppet. If he remembers any of it, he’d know how close he got to hurting them-or how he did hurt them, in some cases.

Maybe she’s being too hard on Xornoth. For Scott’s sake, for fWhip’s sake, she needs to at least give him a chance.

“Okay,” she says quietly, and while she doesn’t elaborate, Scott seems to understand.

“Thank you,” he murmurs, then turns and leaves.

Gem stays there for a long moment, before heading off to fWhip’s room. She needs to see him.

_____

Xornoth is both dreading and excited about his return to Rivendell. When the elf king had sprung it on him, Xornoth’s immediate reaction had been dumbfounded silence. He’d expected more resistance. He’d asked, of course, which is what got the elf king thinking about it, but when the other elf had given a non committal answer, Xornoth had interpreted that as a no.

Apparently not, though. Instead, he’d been informed only an hour later that they would make the return journey tomorrow—or rather, today, as that day passed with lightning speed.

Right now, he’s sitting on the bed, feet planted on the floor, waiting for his escort to show up. He doesn’t know when they’ll be here, they just said to be ready by noon. And he’s ready as he’ll ever be, he’s just also terrified. What if the people revolt at the news that he’s coming? What if they try to kill him?

Okay, he’s not really worried about that, he’s more worried about them losing faith in their current ruler, who could only have been on the throne for three hundred years at the most. If he loses control because of Xornoth, if the kingdom falls into chaos again, it’ll be all his fault. Again.

He has no doubt that they fear him, that they hate him for what he did to his parents, to Scott—maybe even what he did to himself. He’d been told the night he was annointed Crown Prince that he was very much loved, so for him to turn away from them and betray them in such a significant way… For the new ruler to so easily accept him into Rivendell again, he must either be very secure in his reign, or very foolish. Maybe both.

Though, there’s not really anywhere else he can go. Except maybe for the Gilded Helenthia. Pearl seems to like him. So that’s an option.

He’s debating whether or not to just ask the elven king if that would be preferable, but he’s interrupted by the door swinging open. Looking up, he’s surprised to see the elf king himself. He’d expected him to have gone ahead and made the announcement that he was coming, but apparently not.

“Are you ready?” He asks, and Xornoth nods. What else is he supposed to say? ‘No, I forgot my everything?’ He has nothing but the clothes on his back, and he doesn’t even deserve those. So he nods, and he says nothing to protest when he hands him some rockets and directs him out of the room.

They come out of the hallway into a stairwell, then go down and out the door and they’re in a throne room.

Gem is waiting for them, as is Pearl, who beams when she sees him. “I’ll miss seeing you around,” Pearl tells him as he passes by, and he ducks his head, almost ashamed. He doesn’t know why she’s so kind to him, but he doesn’t deserve it.

Gem nods in his direction when he glances her way. “Good luck, Xornoth,” she says, which is the kindest thing she’s said to him, ever. “And to you, too. Take care of yourself,” she adds, looking over at her elven counterpart. “And remember, I might stop by the library soon, so make sure you keep an eye out for that.”

Xornoth isn’t sure what library she’s talking about, but decides against asking. If it’s important, they’ll tell him. Besides, the other elf seems to know what she’s talking about, so it’s not his problem.

With that, they leave, and head south. They fly over a large expanse of grasslands leading up to three tall peaks, which they skirt around. There’s a spruce forest, that bleeds into a dark oak forest, then they turn east and—

There it is. Rivendell. Just as beautiful as he remembers it, but at the same time, it’s different. There’s a statue that hadn’t been there before, one of a deer that can only be Aeor, and a lodge next to it, and…

And the royal palace is gone. Where it once stood is now an empty field. There’s evidence of life there, trampled pathways amid the tough grass, and fire pits, and lanterns hanging from poles, but the palace, Xornoth’s childhood home, is gone. Not even a trace of rubble remains.

He pulls up in shock, and the elf king notices almost immediately, whirling around and beating his wings furiously to remain aloft. “Xornoth?” He asks, an odd note of emotion in his voice, and Xornoth shakes his head slowly.

“What happened to…?” He manages, gesturing toward the empty spot, and the elf turns to look over his shoulder like he’d forgotten that the palace had ever stood there.

The other elf deflates slightly. “Oh. Right.” He clears his throat. “Exor burned it down that night. There were only a few survivors.”

Suddenly dizzy, Xornoth glides down to land at the base of a thick oak tree, then slides down to sit on a large root. Burying his face in his hands, he tries desperately to control himself, because the last thing he wants to do is show just how badly this has shaken him.

Just this one glimpse of his homeland, his kingdom, is apparently enough to make him come undone. He just can’t let the other elf know how far undone he’s become. If he finds out, he might not let him come home until he is emotionally stable.

He’ll never be stable, but he knows he’ll never be murderous, never be a danger. He can never risk becoming a monster again.

“I did that,” he whispers to himself, still barely believing it. So many people, servants, guards, their families, his family, all dead in one terrible night.

A hand on his shoulder makes him flinch, but he doesn’t look up. There’s only one person it could be, and why on earth the elven king is taking it upon himself to comfort him is beyond him. All he can do is act grateful and try not to wish bitterly that it were his mother, or his father. Or Scott. He’d die to have Scott with him again.

“It wasn’t you.”

“It was my hands, my body,” Xornoth tries to explain, “I did it, nevermind that Exor put the idea in my head. Why can’t you see that?”

“And why can’t you see that it wasn’t your idea or your will to do it?” The elf returns, just as insistent. “It’s not your fault. Never your fault, not this. No one blamed you. We… we mourned you.”

Xornoth looks up, peeking between his fingers at the cyan-haired elf. He’s hiding something, he’s almost certain of it; between the nervous twisting of fingers and the avoidance of eye contact, it’s slightly obvious, but Xornoth is also certain that he shouldn’t pry. He’s being given enough, he doesn’t need explanations.

(He needs a prison cell, a jail somewhere they can all forget about him like he’s the bad guy in a fairy tale who always fades into obscurity. He needs long torture to make penance for all his crimes, for all the hurt he inflicted. He needs a quick, sure death, a one-way trip to the deepest parts of hell.)

(He needs his family.)

(He’ll never get them.)

Instead, he scoffs, but heaves himself up to his feet. “I appreciate the sentiment, but you should never mourn the villain. That just comes back to bite you.”

“Thankfully, biting us is one of the things you didn’t do,” the elf jokes, “Though Joey might have been into that. I don’t know, though, that man is strange on a good day.”

He still has only a vague idea who Joey is, but he’s sure he’s someone important. He’ll ask later.

Instead, all he does is huff. “That doesn’t make things better.”

“No,” the elf agrees. “Only you can make it better. You have a second chance, Xornoth. Make the most of it.”

Notes:

I won't lie, Scott's line about Xornoth biting them and Joey being into it came out of nowhere but it gets me every time.

#creative writing #empires smp #fanfiction #how do I tag #writing #angst #fanfic #empiresblr #empires s1

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