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asirensrage · 3 years ago

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The Art of the Steal - Billy Russo x You

Title: The Art of the Steal Rating: Explicit Fandom: The Punisher Pairing: Mafia!Billy Russo x female reader Warnings: Sex. Violence. Threats. Kidnapping. Unprotected sex. Summary: An old friend throws you under the bus.

Notes: This started with @vixenofcourse asking for a distraction and me going "okay, imagine this...you're in the office..." I rarely write this pov but I have a couple requests in my askbox for my 800 follower celebration and I continued this for practice. It's unbeta'd. Please let me know what you think. Thank you. Hope you enjoy!

Masterlist

It's been a terrible day.

The hours are dragging on. You're back to daydreaming about quitting while you refresh the email, waiting for the one thing you need to reply to in order to finish the rest of your tasks so you can go home. It has yet to arrive and you already called the person asking about its status. They promised it within the hour but it's looking more like it'll be the actual end of the day before you get it. You shouldn't be surprised.

A shadow passes over you. Half expecting it to either be your boss or the creep down the hall who keeps trying to shoot his shot, you look up slowly. It's neither. The man standing there is tall, handsome and looking way too good in a suit that fits perfectly. You've never seen him before but he's watching you with a small smile on his face.

"Can I help you?" You ask.

"I hope so. I'm looking for someone." He gives you your name.

"You found her."

He grins. "I was hoping it would be you."

Your eyes narrow in suspicion. “For what?”

“She didn’t tell you.”

“Who?”

“Your friend, Sarah, set you up. Gave you up might be more accurate.”

You haven’t spoken to Sarah in months. The two of you fell apart because she kept running off to parties and getting herself in trouble and got pissed when you didn’t want to join. You had no regrets over that friendship ending, though you did worry she would get herself into hot water.

“I don’t know Sarah.”

He grins slightly at you. “Sure you do. Just like she knows you and what you’re capable of.”

You glance around. There’s no one else standing about though you catch some of the others still in the place glancing at both of you. “You got the wrong girl,” you tell him.

“I don’t.” He leans forward, hands resting on the desk. “I hear you’re quite the artist.”

“Sure,” you say dryly. “I’m great at painting pets.”

“We both know it’s more than that.” His voice lowers slightly. “Now your…not friend Sarah got herself into some hot water and owes something specific. She can’t pay it.”

Somehow, you’re not at all surprised. “Sounds like a her problem.”

“It is but she gave me you. Now either you’re going to help me or I’m going to have my men start removing pieces.”

You’re tempted to tell him to go ahead and take them. Sarah did this to herself. Maybe it would help her finally realize there are consequences to her actions. You sigh though. Years of friendship linger enough to make you feel guilty about it.

“Say I do decide I know Sarah,” you say slowly. “What exactly are you looking for?”

“I suggest we don’t talk about this here.”

“Well, hate to break it to you, I got another couple hours here. You’re going to have to wait.”

He straightens. “We’ll see.” He moves past your desk, heading towards the office where your boss resides, closing the door behind him. Something tells you this is not going to be good.

When he returns, your boss follows him. They both stop at your desk and you note the way your boss keeps wiping his hands on his pants. He’s swallowing nervously.

“There you are,” your boss says. He glances at the man next to him before turning back to you. “Why don’t you leave early today? In fact, take the next week.”

“A week?” the suited man asks, raising his eyebrows at your boss.

“Come back when you’re ready,” your boss corrects.

“Are you firing me?” you ask carefully.

“No, no,” your boss reassures. “Of course not.”

“I’m not finished with my work. I still need the email from Accounting.”

“I’ll take care of it,” your boss says. “Don’t worry. Just…go.”

Your eyes narrow at the two men across from you and you calculate your choices. Something bad happened in that office. Sarah clearly ran her mouth about your extracurricular hobbies and now is attempting to drag you down with her.

Your boss retreats back into his office, turning to look at the other man with something that looks like fear in his eyes.

You turn back to the man who is still standing across from you.

“Shall we?” he asks, motioning for you to get up and move.

“No.” You lean back in your chair and stare up at him. “I don’t know you. You came in here looking for me, on the word of someone I haven’t spoken to in months, and clearly just threatened my boss and ex-friend. You’re going to have to give me at least a name.”

He smirks at that before holding out his hand. “Billy Russo.”

You take it carefully and shake it, feeling the calluses on his fingers. “Let me get ready. I’m going to need to grab some stuff if I won’t be back for a while.” He nods and you take the time to close your computer and pack up your bag. “I just need to make sure my work is covered. I’m going to hand it off to my coworkers.” You pick up a stack of files, making sure not to look at him as you head over to some of the others in the office who have been keeping an eye on what was happening.

You walk over to the nearest desk, handing over a file and mentioning that something came up. You can feel his eyes on you. You continue on, stopping at a couple of desks before heading to one that you know is out of the eye line from yours.

You drop the files on the top of one of the cabinets and quickly move for the stairs. Fuck this. Old friend or not, you are not getting roped into whatever this is. Sarah made her choices. You are making yours.

You get down to the ground floor without anyone following behind you. It’s luck you weren’t aware you had and you’re suddenly grateful that you’ve moved since the last time you saw Sarah.

You open the door, ready to sprint if you have to for the nearest exit. You don’t get the chance. Billy Russo is there, pushing you back into the stairwell and covering your mouth with a cloth. You hold your breath.

“Nice try but you’re not quite fast enough.”

His grip on your face tightens over the cloth and before you can stop yourself, you gasp for air. The smell of chemicals fills your nose and your sight goes dark.

Waking up with your head already pounding sucks. Everything already feels like it hurts, like you're hungover despite the fact that you know you weren’t drinking. It’s the feeling of someone brushing your hair back that makes your eyes snap open.

It takes a moment before you recognize the face that’s near yours. You recoil automatically.

“Sleeping beauty wakes.”

You groan at the way he already seems pleased with himself. He moves back and you try to sit up. The world spins.

“What did you do to me?”

“You tried to run,” he says. “Admirable effort but you didn’t think it would be that easy, did you?”

“I hoped,” you admit. You turn, planting your feet on the ground as you sit on the cot you were laying on. Your stomach revolts at the movement and a bucket appears in front of you in time for you to heave into it. You grip the bucket like it’s a lifeline until it finally feels like there’s nothing left to throw up. You wipe at your mouth and grimace before finally looking around.

The room you’re in is dark aside from the light hanging from the ceiling. It’s enough to show you that the place is empty aside from the cot and the chair he’s sitting on. It’s a bit of a relief considering the way your head is pounding. “What do you want?”

“I already told you. You’re going to do a job for me and in return, your friend gets her debt cleared.”

“And if I refuse?”

“Then things are going to get more…unpleasant.”

Considering you were already attacked just for trying to run for it, you’re not really willing to press it. Your face, head and stomach already hurt and that was from one encounter. You didn’t want to have more.

“What’s the job?”

“A simple forgery, one I’m told you have the skills to do. I need a piece of art replicated.”

You consider it. It isn’t something that you advertise. Very few people know what you’re capable of. Unfortunately, Sarah was one of them. She likely told him everything you could do.

“I’m going to need everything you know about the piece in question, all my tools and some very specific things to do this. Including a workspace.”

“Give me a list. You’ll get it all.”

“It’s only the one job,” you say. “One job and I’m done. You don’t bother me again.”

He smirks, looking like a shark in the dark. “You want me to leave you alone when you’re done, I will. But sure. One job.”

“And the next time Sarah fucks up, it’s on her. I’m not her get out of jail free card, got it?”

He grins. “Sure thing, sweetheart.”

He keeps to his word and gets everything you ask for.

You’re set up in a room that has all the tools, paints and information on the painting you’re meant to replicate. You demand that you be left alone. You work best when you’re not interrupted by others. He gives the orders to everyone to leave you be…he just doesn’t heed them himself.

“I told you I needed to be alone.”

“You said you needed silence,” Billy counters. “I’m not saying a word.”

You give him an unimpressed look. “I work best alone. Don’t you have other things to do?”

“And deprive you of my company?” he grins. “Maybe I just want to get to know you better.”

“I’d rather not.” You peer carefully at the canvas in front of you. Any fear you had of the man faded once you started to get involved in your work. It also helped that he kept showing up, occasionally bringing snacks and asking questions. It did a lot to endear him to you.

You grab a little more paint with the brush, adding bits to the shadows in the grass. It’s a constant back and forth between your copy and the original, adding the bits that really match it. This isn’t the most important part. The type of canvas and paint is important to match the time period it was created, but it’s the wear and tear that really make it authentic. You have to match any small ticks that the original artist had.

“Why are you working in an office when you can do this?” Billy asks, standing close behind you as he watches.

“Because this is a hobby and I don’t do it for money.”

“Could be well off if you did.”

“Could also go to jail if I got caught. I like my freedom.”

“Don’t we all.”

You can feel him reach out, touching the ends of your hair that is pushed back out of your face. “Will you stop? Go bother someone else.”

“They’re not as fun or as pretty. Why? You want to see me covered in blood? I can make that happen.”

“I’m sure you could.” You put the brush down and turn in your chair to look at him. He’s not wearing a suit today. In fact, he looks more comfortable than ever in jeans and a sweater. If your meeting hadn’t been tarnished by him kidnapping you, you might have been more inclined to his interest. Or at least more polite. “Billy, I can’t work like this.”

“Like what?”

“With you hovering!”

He stares at you for a moment before he leans forward, hands resting on the arms of your chair. You lean back as much as you can. Billy is attractive and you can smell the spicy scent of his cologne with how close he is. Your breath hitches slightly as you see his gaze dart to your lips.

“You’re right,” he says softly. “I’ll leave you be…after you take a break and come eat with me.”

You swallow tightly. He still hasn’t moved back and he’s close enough that he just needs to lean forward a little more and his mouth will be on yours. Not that you should be thinking that. Especially with him. “I shouldn’t.”

“I ain’t asking. Come with me.”

There’s an innuendo in there and you know it. “Okay.”

He grins at you and finally moves back, giving you some space that you feel like you can breathe again. “Good girl.”

Something flares low in your stomach at that and you try to ignore it. “Give me a second.” You turn back, cleaning off the brush and covering the paints to make sure they don’t dry out while you’re gone. When you’re ready, you turn back to him. “Let’s go.”

He offers you his hand, helping you to your feet before he moves it to sit at your lower back. He ushers you out of the room, clearly pleased to have gained your compliance. It makes you want to punch him in his stupid perfect face.

You pass the guards outside the room who don’t even look at you. They murmur greetings to Billy, who ignores them, more content to lean towards you. He says something softly but you’re not entirely paying attention. You can barely focus with the warmth of him against you and his voice in your ear. He knows it too. You can tell by the smirk on his face.

He leads you down a hall before opening a door and motioning for you to enter. You do. Whatever you were expecting, this isn’t it.

The room is softly lit with a lamp and a few candles. There’s a table that’s already laid out with place settings. If you’re completely honest, it looks like a rich date. It makes you want to run but the door closes behind you and he’s touching your back again.

“Come on, sweetheart. Let’s eat.”

Billy Russo is driving you insane.

At first, it was the way he hovered, giving not so subtle threats as he watched you work, pushing your irritation to its limits until you snapped at him. Now it was because you were keenly aware of him when he was around and the way he kept trying to take care of you. It was the snacks and demands to join him to eat when he was here. It was the way he kept finding ways to touch you that sent shivers down your spine.

You are nearly done with the painting. It feels like a blessing and yet…you find yourself a little hesitant. When you finally get free and the threat of Sarah losing fingers is no longer hanging over your head, you’ll be going back to an office job that you hate. Then again, your boss looked terrified the last time you saw him. You might be able to use that. At least to get more vacation days. You aren’t above using what opportunities are given to you.

Billy stands behind you, staring at the latest process in aging the canvas. He’s been strangely silent now that you’re almost done.

“What do you think?” you ask quietly.

“I’ll get an appraiser. Test the quality.”

“Of course.”

He keeps staring at the painting. “You’re very good.”

“I know.”

He smirks at you. “Might take a few days.”

You try not to roll your eyes. “Are they going to be aware that it’s a fake?”

“Course not,” he says. “Where’s the fun in that?”

“It’s a better challenge that way,” you grin as you say it. You know you’re good at what you do but you haven’t been tested in a long time.

He shifts slightly, moving closer to you. “You gonna miss me when you’re done here?”

“No,” you lie. You won’t admit the ways you’ve actually enjoyed this. It’s been a while since you’ve been able to focus on your art like this.

He smirks like he knows. His hand touches your arm, stroking down it softly causing goosebumps to prickle in its wake. His eyes meet yours and for a moment, you think you can see his thoughts. So, before he can make any threats, any promises, you decide to do something that you’ve been thinking about. You kiss him. Just quickly, just to know what it feels like. It doesn’t mean anything, you just want him out of your system before you leave so you don’t sit around wondering.

He’s faster.

His arm goes around your waist, hand pressed against your back, pulling you into him. His other hand cups your jaw, kissing you harder. You can’t help but react, opening your mouth to deepen the kiss. Your arms go over his shoulders, trying to get closer. You want to feel this. Just once.

He breaks the kiss first, murmuring against your lips how he’s waited, how he’s wanted to kiss you since he saw you glaring at your computer. Since you ran. You pull him back to your lips.

Billy kisses you over and over, moving until you’re leaning back against the table and away from the easel. He lifts you to sit, moving between your legs as his hands tilt your face up to his. His lips move across your cheek and down your neck, taking his time to kiss and suck marks into your skin. It feels like he’s trying to brand you as his.

You arch into him, letting your head fall back as you lose yourself in the feeling. One of his hands moves, sliding up your thigh slowly, back and forth. It’s just enough to keep you aware of him. It feels as though you’re being consumed by him, bit by bit. For a moment, you’re almost tempted to thank Sarah for the problem she brought to your door. If only because the man could kiss.

It’s only when he tries to get you to lean back that you stop him. “I’m not messing up my paints,” you tell him. “Not here.”

He kisses you again. “‘Course not, sweetheart. Let me take care of you. Properly.” His hands go to your waist, helping you off the table before he leads you to the door. Your awareness of him is still heightened. He keeps a hand on you, slipping under the shirt you’re wearing so that he can touch your skin. You’re so lost in how it feels, still a little drunk on his kisses, that you don’t actually pay attention to where he’s bringing you. At least until you recognize that it’s an entirely new area.

Before you can question it, you’re led into another room. The door closes and locks behind you. Billy’s chest presses against your back as you look around the lit bedroom. It’s not too opulent but it’s also larger than your apartment.

Billy’s lips are back on your neck, just for a moment before you feel him lift your shirt. You raise your arms to help before you turn towards him. His hand goes under your hair to the back of your neck, gripping just tight enough as he pulls you into him. His lips meet yours again.

“Undress, darling,” he says when you finally break the kiss. “Let me see you.”

“Quid pro quo,” you counter. He grins at you and there’s just enough sharpness in it that something flutters in you. He raises his eyebrows, looking at you pointedly. You take the hint.

You undo your bra first, letting it fall to the floor before pulling down the yoga pants you had requested to wear. You liked to be comfortable while creating. His eyes watch every movement and they somehow seem to grow darker as he stares.

“Fucking beautiful,” he says.

Heat flares in your stomach in response. “Well?” you ask, ignoring the way you feel way too exposed in comparison.

“Get on the bed.”

Part of you wants to argue but there’s something in the way he’s looking at you that compels you to move. You’re not one of his minions, but it’s your choice that makes you go. You both know it.

You watch as he pulls off the shirt he’s wearing. You catch sight of the scars on his shoulder, chest and abdomen, but you don’t ask. You’re more focused on the way he unbuckles his belt before unbuttoning his jeans and letting them fall to the floor. You could feel him hardening against you when you kissed, but seeing it was always different.

He comes toward you, bending down to kiss you again. He guides you to lie down, mouth still moving against yours. You really shouldn’t be doing this but any argument is lost as his hands move against your bare skin.

“Tell me you want this, sweetheart.” His lips move back against your neck, nipping lightly at your skin. He grabs one of your legs, hooking it around his waist and pressing closer. He grinds against you.

You moan softly. “Please, Billy. Stop teasing.”

“Tell me,” he says again. His mouth goes lower, leaving marks against your chest. He covers one of your nipples, sucking softly. “You want this?”

“Please.” Your hand goes to the back of his head, trying to gain more friction.

One of his hands cups the breast his mouth isn’t on. His fingers tweak at the nipple, squeezing lightly. “Sweetheart, you gonna play with me?”

“No,” you moan.

He grinds against you again. “You want me? You want this?”

“Yes.”

He grins against your skin before moving lower. Your head falls back as he goes between your legs. It doesn’t take long before you’re arching up against him. He grabs your hands before you can touch him, pinning them against the bed. He doesn’t relent.

You hook a heel against his back, trying desperately to keep him there, even as the pressure grows. He continues, using his tongue against you until you’re keening and begging and rocking your hips, trying to gain more friction. It’s not enough. You need more.

He finally pulls back, just as you get close to the precipice that would send you over the edge. You can’t help but whine at the loss. You feel him chuckle against you.

“Now who’s playing?” you ask.

“Don’t worry. I’ll let you win.” He shifts then, angling himself before pushing into you slowly. Your mouth falls open, eyes closed as you try to breathe against the intrusion. He groans before burying his face in your neck. “Feel so fucking good,” you hear him say. “So fucking good. Knew you would.”

You can barely concentrate. You are pinned by him in more ways than one, surrounded and lost in the sensations he creates. Especially when he pulls back just a bit so he can thrust forward.

“Let me hear you.”

He moves slowly, muscles tense as he pulls out and pushes in. It’s not enough and he knows it. You’re left trying to reach for him, even as he pins your hands down again. This time over your head.

“You’re taking me so well,” he punctuates it by grinding his hips against yours. It’s not enough friction. You need him to move more. “Doing so good.”

His words make you clench around him. “Please,” you beg. “Please, please, please.”

“Please what?”

“Fucking move!”

He laughs slightly but he lets go of one of your hands to hook his arm under one of your thighs. He shifts his angle with it and increases his pace. Your orgasm finally hits.

Your one free hand clings to him, digging your nails across his back as he kisses you hard. He doesn’t stop though, dragging out your release as he chases his own. He moves the leg he’s holding up against his arm up onto his shoulder and leans closer to you. You’re going to be sore but you can’t bring yourself to care. Not when the feeling is building back up. You move your hand to your clit, trying to get there faster. Billy grabs it, bringing it back above your head and shifting his grip so he’s holding both your wrists with one hand. He moves his free hand to your clit.

“I wanna hear you, sweetheart. Come for me.”

You break around him, crying out. His pace increases, hips jerking forward as he kisses you before swearing and groaning against your mouth. When he finally slows, both of you are covered in sweat. He doesn’t move, preferring to lazily kiss you over and over. You can’t help but return it, still reeling from your high.

He finally moves and you feel the loss of him instantly. You know you need to get cleaned up, and it takes a moment before you realize you didn’t use a condom.

Fuck.

Thank god you had an implant. It saved you at least from the fear of getting pregnant.

You look over at Billy who looks as though he’s about to pass out. You need to get out of here. You need to clean up, go to your cot and get some sleep before finishing the last touches on the painting. You shift sideways, closer to the edge of the bed.

“You won’t get out,” Billy says without even opening his eyes. “There’s a bathroom there if you want to clean up.” He motions to the left. You look over and see a couple of doors. You get up, going through the motions automatically to clean up before you come back to the bed. Billy moves past you, completely confident that you won’t run while he’s in the bathroom. Not that there’s much point. He proved that in the beginning.

He comes up behind you, kissing your neck softly. “Come to bed.”

You follow automatically. There’s no other option.

Your forgery passes inspection.

You watch as Billy thanks the inspector. It’s been two days since you slept together and thankfully, he’s been busy. You’ve been left alone to your own devices, finishing the painting and counting the moments until you can leave. You have a life to get back to, after all.

Billy comes back and stands before you. He looks you over and you try not to shift under his gaze.

“Well?” you ask.

“Excellent work,” he tells you. “It passed.”

“I know,” you tell him. “That means Sarah’s left alone and I get to go home.”

“Maybe I’ll just have to keep you,” he teases.

It makes you scowl. “We have a deal.”

“No,” he says, stepping closer. “The deal was for one job. I said I’d leave you alone if you wanted me to, but you don’t want me to, do you?” He steps forward again until he’s right in front of you.

You swallow tightly. “I’m not a part of this.”

“Sweetheart, you’ve been a part of this since Sarah gave your name.” His hand moves to the back of your neck.

“I’m not.”

He smirks at you. “You’re mine. You’ve been mine since I saw you, since you ran from me. Since I caught you.” Emphasizing each point with another drugging kiss. He pulls back and his eyes meet yours. “And I’m yours. Do we have a new deal?”

Taglist: @raith-way @lokitrasho @zeleniafic @jvstjewels @reggiemantleholdmyhand-tle @chickensarentcheap @residentdormouse @borg-queer @delicateblackrose @stanshollaand @itscapokaybye

Billy Russo: @profoundme444

#more smut #lol #billy russo fanfic #billy russo x reader #billy russo x you #billy russo oneshot #billy russo smut #billy russo x female reader #billy russo fic

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asherloki · 3 years ago

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It's about being happy

Steven grant x reader

Requested by @honeyx666x

Friends to lovers

Part 2

Part 3

A/N :- I'm doing request works. And I enjoyed writing it!

You dressed up a little to visit the museum. As you're quite fond of it, also because you've made a friend there, a self claimed tour guide who explains things better than the actual tour guides. He actually works for the gift shop at the museum. Steven grant! As you entered you saw your friend explaining things to some kids, as usual of course. You went to him tip toed and covered his eyes from behind which startled him and made the kids laugh.

"Guess who it is Mr tour guide" you whispered.

Trembling fingers touched your hands. He can never not know which one's you and which one's not. Especially your voice made it clear to him.

"Y/N" said he.

You let him open his eyes again and said "you bustard ! How is it everytime you know it's me"

He got stunned and said "please mate kids are here and also...." He couldn't tell you how could he not know you? He has loved you since he saw you and he still does. When you became his friend he was over the moon. Why won't he ? He isn't much appreciated, much loved. But you love him as a friend. He enjoys watching movies in your laptop with you in his messy flat, you're the only one who doesn't complaint about his flat, you love spending time with him there.

"Anyways" you startled him " I have to meet someone today so wrap this up we need to talk"

No wonder it was your boyfriend whom you wanted to meet. Steven wanted to tell you how much he loves you but you're in a relationship with a guy, well not a perfect relationship though, you two were kinda on and off all the time.

"Yes give me half an hour please" asked he and you agreed.

After half an hour,

He then came and said "so who's this you're meeting?"

"Andy"

"As always"

"Yes ! He says he has a happy news"

"You might be pretty happy then ?"

"Well Steven! I don't feel so happy about him lately but I think I love him so... I don't know he's just perfect, perfect eyes , hair, smile ... So perfect"

"Unlike me" muttered Steven to himself

"What's that?"

"Nothing! You deserve someone perfect look at you, I've never seen anyone as pretty as you" said he

You wished if Andy said it too, you love him... Well maybe but he doesn't make you as happy as Steven does. You both stared into each other's eyes when you felt something you haven't felt before until Donna interrupted "Stevie! Take these , do a ruddy job you fool"

"Oh Donna can I take Steven with me today i mean can you grant him half day please?"

"Why would I?"

"Well I need him, please Donna"

"He can finish these works and go"

That made you wait for one hour more and finally you two can move.

You both reached the meeting spot,

You saw Andy was already there "sorry Andy for keeping you waiting "

"It's alright, hey Steven "

"Hello mate! Hope you're doing great " they shook hands.

"So what is it?" You asked

"So" started Andy"I wanted to tell you that I've been a fool to let you down a few times but I promise to never let you down again" he got down on one knee , took out a ring "will you marry me Y/N?"

Steven felt like he's been hit hard , he still tried to smile but you? You were totally out of your mind, he's perfect his proposal is what you've been waiting for all these days but you didn't feel happy, being with him and letting him disappoint you all the time didn't felt right so you were silent you could only think of Steven somehow, you wanted someone like Steven.. wait someone like Steven? you thought until Andy woke you up from your daydream "you alright?" said he in his proud manner .

"I don't want to" you said

"What" said both Steven and Andy

"Yes I, I think I love someone else"

"You must be joking, we've dating for a long time"

"I know but I wasn't happy with you, I am happy when I'm with him" you said looking at Steven

"M..me?" Stammerd Steven

"This? This dumb gift shop guy you choose over me? You're out of your mind" said Andy

"I'm might be, to let you go even though you're perfect but it was never a matter of being perfect. It was , it was about me being happy"

You came and held steven's hand "you make me happy, don't you love me? Won't you love me?"

"Oh Y/N ! I've loved you since our eyes met i never thought you would ask this but yes I love you"

Andy stood there and you looked apologetically.

"Ok then live in his messy flat, don't say then I didn't warn you"

"I won't Andy"

He went away, you looked at Steven and kissed him,

"I might've done something good to get you"

"You've done nothing wrong really" you replied.

"you think you can handle my DID?"

"I can, when I have you Steven with a V".

#loki x reader fic #loki x reader smut #marc spector #moon knight #steven grant #jake lockley

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peakyblindersxx · 4 years ago

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drunk in love - john shelby x reader

a/n: hello my loves :) here is the john fic that i'm personally really excited about bc i fucking love him & i hope you guys like it!! i'm taking requests if you guys want me to write anything in specific and as always, feel free to message me :)

love, abi xxx

gif by: @deeptheon

prompt: you're john's secretary & he takes you on a trip.

warnings: nsfw!! smut with a teeny tiny bit of fluff if you squint, choking, power play, john being generally irresistible

There were many words to describe John Shelby. Cowardly was not one of them. In the short time you had known him, you had seen him fight god knows how many people, in countless bars across Birmingham. You had seen and heard stories of John blowing up buildings and setting bars on fire. And of course, there was the matter of his arrogance. John dripped confidence from his shoes to his slicked back hair. So cocky, in fact, that you almost wanted to tell him to shut up as much as you wanted to ride his face. Almost.

So, there you sat wistfully at your desk, sneaking glances of him in his office whenever you could. Not that you would even have a chance if you tried; you were his goddamn secretary. Despite the fact that he oozed arrogance, John was a good boss, who always approved your requests for days off. Sure, you were at his beck and call pretty much 24/7, but this also meant you had a front row seat to all the girls he fucked. The women were always stunning, making your hopes deflate even further. However, for the last month, there had been no women. You chalked it up to him finding some sort of girlfriend, so you kept your interactions with him as businesslike as possible. Deep down, through every meeting, phone call, and even just through the windows of his office, you drank in every second of John you could get. He was intoxicating; the smell of his cologne nearly brought you to your knees.

You snapped out of your thoughts, training your eyes back on the work in front of you and taking a drag from your cigarette. Suddenly, you felt a tap on your shoulder. It was Lizzie, a cigarette between her slightly pursed lips. “John wants you in his office. He doesn’t seem mad, but then again, who knows,” she stated. You stood, smoothing out your red pleated skirt and black blouse and quickly opening your compact to make sure your lipstick hadn’t smudged. “Thanks, Lizzie,” you replied, shooting her a smile as she made her way back to her desk. You made your way across the open office space to John’s office, knocking softly on the frosted window pane that read Shelby Company, Ltd in gold lettering.

“Come in,” John called out, his voice muffled behind the wooden door. You turned the doorknob and entered his office, shutting the door behind you. John sat at a tufted leather chair, puffing from a cigar, flipping through a folder. His suit jacket was abandoned on the velvet settee that sat in front of the fireplace, the gold chains of his sleeve garters glistening in the light. The glow from the fireplace glinted off of John’s profile, catching the frame of his jaw just right. You admired the way the light reflected off of the rings on his hands, making you want to feel the cool metal against your body. His hair was neatly slicked back as usual, along with his dark grey vest, white dress shirt, and tie, making him command the attention of the room.

“Lizzie said you wanted to see me?” You questioned, standing at the back of the room.

“Have a seat, Y/N,” John responded, gesturing towards the empty chairs that sat in front of his oak desk. You sat, crossing your legs and tucking them under the chair. John took another puff from his cigar, smoke billowing through the room. “I need to go to London, and

I need you with me.” You were a little surprised at this, since John had never asked you to go somewhere this far with him before.

“For how long?” You asked, taking a cigarette out and lighting it, your lipstick staining it a dark pink as you took a drag. John’s blue eyes bored into yours as he absent-mindedly flicked his cigar, ashing it into the crystal ashtray on his desk. It was almost as if he could read your mind and see all the filthy things you were imagining him doing to you. God, he was fucking irresistable.

“A week,” John replied, shooting his glass of whiskey as he stood, making his way to a locked cabinet and pulling out a wad of pound notes. He peeled a number of them off, making his way towards you and holding them out for you to take, leaning back against his desk facing you. “Buy yourself some nice dresses, eh? There’s going to be a lot of dinners, and I need you there to take notes.”

You accepted the cash, taking a long drag from your cigarette as your eyes met John’s. You couldn’t bring yourself to resist the urge to flirt back. “What’s your favorite color?” John seemed a little surprised at the question, but his normal confidence quickly returned as he smirked. “Black. I’ll pick you up tomorrow morning, eh?”

You nodded as he poured himself another whiskey, daydreaming about the way his rough hands would feel around your throat. “Is that all, Mr. Shelby?” You asked, black kitten heels tapping against the carpet.

John nodded, taking a sip from his glass. “I’ll see you at eight tomorrow.” You stood, turning to walk out of John’s office as you felt his eyes on your figure. As you closed the door behind you, you shivered in expectation. A week alone with John Shelby. How were you going to manage to keep your hands to yourself?

***

The rest of the work day passed quickly, and you headed to the nearest department store, choosing three different black dresses. As much as you hated to admit it, you wanted to look good for John. You wanted him to want you; to feel that longing that you felt between your legs every time his eyes met yours. You chose a longer formal black dress made of silk, a black sequined dress for a party, and the last, a short black dress with fringe that made you look almost like a burlesque dancer. You knew it was risky, exposing that much skin, but then again, John Shelby wasn’t a normal man. He knew what he wanted and he took it, never paying mind to what others thought.

As the rest of the night flew by, you found yourself tossing and turning in bed. No matter how many times you touched yourself, you couldn’t get the image of John’s smirk out of your head. You wanted him to bend you over right in his office, and you didn’t care who heard. You wanted him to take everything you had to offer. Eventually, you fell asleep, waking up to the sound of birds chirping loudly outside your apartment window. You almost jumped out of bed, blood pumping with excitement. You got ready, slipping on a dark purple silk dress with black tights and purple pumps, stuffing your cigarette case and pocketbook in your black handbag. You poured yourself a cup of tea, hurrying to get all your bags ready as you didn’t want to keep John waiting.

Right as eight o’clock arrived, you heard a knock on your door. It was John, smelling sweetly of cologne and wearing a freshly pressed black pinstripe three piece suit with a grey tie. His cap sat tilted on his head, and dangling from his lips was a cigar. He was a fucking vision to behold, and your head spun at the thought of the two hour car ride in close quarters that you were about to endure. The driver came in to take your bags, leaving John to walk you to the car. He held out his hand to help you step into the Bentley, your skin buzzing with electricity where his fingers touched yours. John closed the door, making his way to the other side and sliding into the leather interior while the driver finished putting the bags in the trunk and made his way to the driver’s seat, starting the engine and taking off.

John’s blue-grey eyes met yours as he puffed at his cigar, cracking the window slightly to let the smoke waft out. “You pack everything we need?” You subconsciously pressed your legs together, filthy images swirling through your brain as you managed to ignore them. “Yes, Mr. Shelby, I got the list you sent me for what to bring. Did you need anything other than that?”

John shook his head no, putting out his cigar in the ashtray. A comfortable silence settled over the two of you as the car rumbled along over the brick roads.

“What’s your favorite color?” You looked over at John in surprise. He must have understood your confusion as he added, “You asked what mine was. I want to know yours.”

“Red,” you replied, fumbling for a cigarette, and when finding one, striking a match to light it.

John’s eyes fixed on your dark red stained lips. “Red, aye?”

Your instincts got the better of you. “Is there a problem with that, Mr. Shelby?”

“Call me John,” he said, words muffled by the cigarette in his mouth that he was lighting. After he finished, he took a drag, fixing his eyes back on you. “And, no. The opposite, actually.”

You weren’t brave enough to ask what that meant, so you let silence take over once again. Maybe later, when you had had a few drinks in you. What the fuck were you doing?

Finally, the dirt roads underneath once again turned into cobblestone, and you knew you were in London by the smell and smoke that hovered over the city. The Bentley rolled to a stop in front of a massive factory building, stretching blocks long. You could hear the yells of the workers from inside the car. John reached for his gun, loading it and affixing it back into his holster.

“We’ve got a meeting first, then dinner. Driver’s going to drop off our bags at the hotel. C’mon sweetheart, and stay by me. Who knows what these fuckers are going to pull around here,” John said, opening the door and reaching his hand out for you to take. You blushed at the pet name, taking John’s hand as he quickly whisked you off the street and into the building, up a flight of stairs where two men directed the two of you into a meeting room with a large table and dark leather chairs. John sank into the chair at the head of the table, and you slid into the seat next to him, taking out a notebook. Before you had any time to even write the date, John’s hand was on your waist, pulling you close to him. Your skin prickled with goosebumps at the proximity.

“If anybody pulls a fucking gun, you get behind me. You understand?” You nodded, crossing your legs at the ankle as you tried to focus your thoughts on something other than how fucking amazing John smelled. John’s hand left your waist as the door opened, the men whom he was meeting with entering the room. The meeting was uneventful, John successfully closing the deal with these men, who you found out were the Chinese. The driver picked you both up out front, taking the two of you back to your hotel to get changed for what you found out was a French restaurant in London’s downtown. The hotel room was a suite with two rooms, one for you and the larger one for John. You decided to wear the short black dress with fringe along with black fluffy kitten heels, and when John walked out of his room, the first word out of his mouth was “Fuck.” Your cheeks blushed a bright pink as John’s eyes traveled down your body.

“You look amazing.” John held out his arm for you to grab, leading you into the car as you took off. It didn’t take long to reach the restaurant, passing through busy streets packed with people of opulence. As John held the door for you to walk in, you almost gasped in amazement at the massive gold chandelier that hung from the ceiling. The waiter led you and John to your table, and as John pulled out your chair for you and walked around the table to sit at his, you almost couldn’t believe you were here, let alone with John Shelby, one of the biggest and by your standards most certainly the most handsome gangsters in Birmingham. Yet, there he sat across from you, looking fucking delectable in a dark grey three-piece suit and black tie.

The dinner was amazing, time passing quickly as the two of you fell into conversation. John Shelby was funny, you realized, and at the heart of it all, sweet. Soon, a glass of wine turned into five, and the driver eventually dropped the two of you back off at the hotel, as the other customers had complained about the raucous laughing coming from your table. You burst into the room giggling, John following close behind, as the two of you flopped onto the velvet settee, knees and shoulders brushing.

“God, you’re fucking pretty,” John said, eyes locking with yours. Your jaw almost dropped as your cheeks turned pink. “What?”

“You heard me,” John said, lighting a cigarette. “You’re fucking pretty.”

You stared at him, alcohol fueling your confidence. “Then why don’t you do something about it?” The words spilled out of your mouth. John wasted no time in pressing his lips against yours roughly, picking you up and setting you on the bed. You moaned into his mouth as he pressed himself against you, feeling his cock hard against your lower stomach, earning a grunt from John as he ripped off your dress, sending buttons flying across the room. You opened your mouth in protest, but John beat you to it. “I’ll buy you three new ones, yeah?” He questioned before running his hands down your hips, a finger slipping underneath the waistband of your black panties. Goosebumps ran down your skin and John chuckled, pressing a kiss to your inner thigh.

“God, you look so pretty all spread out for me. Better than I fucking imagined,” he said, pulling your panties down your legs and rubbing his thumb in circles on your clit. Your body jolted in response. “John,” you panted. “Oh fuck John, please don’t tease me..”

John grinned up at you, pushing one finger in you slowly. “What do you want? Tell me, darling.”

“Your mouth, John, please,” you gasped, squirming for some sort of relief. John responded by licking slowly up your cunt, flicking his tongue in circles around your clit before returning his attention to your pussy, his right hand rubbing your clit. You cried out, back arching as you pushed against John’s mouth. You felt him growl in response, vibrations pulsing throughout your body and sending you over the edge and you came all over John’s face. You attempted to catch your breath as John stood with a boyish smirk, wiping the back of his mouth with his sleeve before discarding his clothes, his large cock standing at attention against his taught stomach muscles.

“God you taste good,” John rumbled, wiping his mouth with the back of his hand. “I think I’ll have you tomorrow for breakfast too,” he grinned. You laughed in response, John cutting that laugh short by running the head of his cock up and down your dripping cunt.

“Sir, please,” you whined, eyes widening when you realized what had just left your mouth. Before you could apologize, you felt John’s hand wrap around your throat.

“You going to be a good girl for me, hmm?” John’s blue eyes bored into yours.

“Yes, sir,” you whimpered, crying out as John entered you at a ridiculous pace, covering your mouth with his. He kissed like a starved man, hungry for everything you had to give, and you gave it gladly. John’s cock bumped up against your g spot with every thrust as he fucked you, your moans echoing throughout the hotel room.

“Your pussy is amazing,” John groaned as he fucked into you relentlessly. “Fucking mine now, yeah?”

You nodded, unable to form the proper words as John chuckled darkly. “Pretty little thing, can’t even talk when I’m fucking you this good, hm?” Your only reply was a moan as John gripped your throat tightly, causing you to see stars.

“That’s right, sweetheart, come all over my cock,” John crooned as you reached your release, continuing to fuck you through your orgasm. You cried out as John fucked you even harder, eyes locked with yours. “Mine,” John grunted, hips snapping flush with yours as he continued to thrust inside of you, your pussy squeezing around his cock as you neared your second orgasm.

“I want you to come in me, sir, please,” you begged, hands clawing at John’s back. John groaned in response, fucking you at the fastest pace he possibly could as your cries echoed off the walls before eventually releasing inside of you, falling onto the bed next you as the two of you caught your breath. John slung an arm around you, pulling you close to him as he locked his eyes with yours.

“I meant what I said, you know.” “What did you say?” You asked, brow furrowed with confusion.

“That you were pretty,” John said, sitting up to grab a cigarette and light it, his blue eyes glistening in the light of the fireplace. “I’ve thought about you more than I’d like to admit.”

You couldn’t believe what you were hearing. “And I’m not just drunk,” John continued, eyes meeting yours again. “I think I’m in love.”

“Me too.” You couldn’t stop the words from coming from your mouth. John followed them with a deep kiss, pulling you on top of him.

“I’m gonna fuck you until the sun comes up,” John grinned as you laughed, covering your mouth with his.

#john shelby x reader #john shelby smut #john shelby imagine #peaky blinders #tommy shelby smut #tommy shelby imagine #peaky blinders imagine #peaky blinders smut #john shelby

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ialwaysknewyouwerepunk · 4 years ago

Text

fine line - a close reading

gonna cry bc i’m at the end, gonna cry bc it’s fine line.

(x x x)

want to give the same disclaimer as with lights up: this song is so layered, so multi-faceted, that i could never hope to give an exhaustive analysis. due to its vagueness and openness for interpretation, i assume that everyone, just like me, has their own ideas about it and has attached importance to it in ways that no one else’s words can or should alter. this song means the world to me for reasons that aren’t necessarily in this post, and that’s how it is with art that touches us deeply. i’ve tried my best to pull it apart, lay it bare, spread it open, if you will, so it’s almost as free as it can be for you all to form your own opinion on it. in the synthesis i will make my own conclusions, but feel free to ignore that if yours are totally different. i’m just one set of brain and heart taking in fine line and projecting whatever i think is right onto it. alright, let’s go

fine line, track 12

sung in falsetto

live version at the form: first verse not sung in falsetto - after first chorus goes into falsetto - like “thinking of her” has summoned her

Put a price on emotion

pouring emotions into the art you create: how much is genuine / how much do you show - line between being authentic to your audience and giving away too much, wanting to keep things to yourself and not feeling truthful with what you’ve written

exploits of the industry: lay your soul bare - or the exact opposite, some pretend emotion - to score that hit

I'm looking for something to buy

cynical. emotions aren’t genuine, right? where can i go buy some?

～ lights up themes. fake life, industry, being a sell-out

You've got my devotion

But man, I can hate you sometimes

“you” = career, music, Harry Styles™. devoted to the craft, to the job, all the ups and downs of it, despite the hardships it brings

“man” is deliberate: can be seen as an offhand interjection, like “man, that’s rough”, but nothing is casually placed in this song. “man” is: The Man, the heads in the industry, the people pulling the strings. The man in Harry, the man he’s been in the media all these years, the part he’s played/had to play, the man that’s in him

⟶ “hate you”: hate for industry shit, self-hate created by having to play pretend (～ only angel analysis, the persona of the Bukowski womaniser)

“sometimes” - it’s not fucked up all the time

“you” could also be a lover, but the sudden “hate” there then would be for that person, which is absent in any other song about them, doesn’t make any sense

I don't want to fight you

And I don't want to sleep in the dirt

like there’s a choice to me made, but he doesn’t want to make it: either I fight this “you” or I sleep in the dirt

“you” as the industry: if he doesn’t fight them, he might end up being a beggar, lose all his self-worth bc he gave in to everything they asked/told him to do

“you” as himself: fight your instincts, part of who you are/the persona. if he doesn’t fight to figure himself out, though, he fears he’ll also lose

“sleep in the dirt” as a sense of rejection, as well

We'll get the drinks in

So I'll get to thinking of her

drinks to cope - falling, only angel, from the dining table - or to be braver and confront emotions better - tbsl

who is “we”? who is “her”?

narrative of “you” as “lover” further disproven: if “I” and the lover get together over drinks and “I” starts thinking of “her”?

⟷ “her” could be the lover, but then who is “you”? the industry? some other person, besides that lover, harry is devoted to? multiple lovers, all of a sudden? no.

⟶ “I” and “you” are all harry, that get to thinking of “her” because she is in daydreams with him. the narrative that harry is fighting a part of him, the persona he has (had) to play bc of industry limits, makes most sense. that persona is within him now, and part of his work, but all of him, “we”, is begging to come into the light - of which she is a huge part

We'll be a fine line

balancing act. let everything coexist but pay attention that those lines don’t get crossed the wrong way. what we are, what i am, is a fine line between what makes us go under and what lets us thrive

we will be: determination to fulfil this prophecy, statement of fact “we always will be”

“we’ll be a fine line”: other way of interpreting it is that on both sides of that line is what entails “we”, all that is harry. what merges on that fine line is where it’s just right, when harry is fully himself in every way

“fine line” can also be an echo of criticism, bigotry, in the style of: it’s a fine line between being simply flamboyant and queer, between dressing like that and people thinking you’re a transvestite or summat (cause we wouldn’t want that, now, would we) - “we’ll be a fine line” could be owning all of it. putting himself in the middle of all those messy lines, as someone queer without a category

Test of my patience

patience with himself - kindness to self - took a long time to figure shit out and it was a challenge

waiting for change: industry and its allowances/openness

There's things that we'll never know

my favorite line

“we” = harry / harry and company / us in general, all of us listening

～ tpwk “i don’t need all the answers”: deep sense of acceptance

peace to be found in accepting this!!

You sunshine, you temptress

“sunshine” - as in all the love songs (blue skies, sunflowers, summer days…): lover - possible that there are multiple “you”s in this song?

sunshine could ofc also be directed at the temptress, still

female “temptress” - “i’ll get to thinking of her” - she - it’s tempting for harry to think of her all the time, to lose himself in the “her” in him

other interpretation for “temptress”: woman he knows with negative influence in his life - resemblance to woman “you flower, you feast”, so echo of Bukowski ～ only angel, kiwi (my sunshine, my love, who is involved with this temptress…)

My hand’s at risk, I fold

⟷ tpwk “dropping into the deep end”

not showing his cards just yet / forfeits

anxious to show all of him, to take the chance, with all the risks and consequences involved

Crisp trepidation

I’ll try to shake this soon

nervousness, anxiety - about (not) taking (enough) chances, (not) laying himself bare (release of the album that reveals much more than before)

“crisp” fresh, this feeling is unfamiliar - change is coming “soon”

sense of agency: I can get rid of this feeling by my own volition and make these changes - hesitant, insecure: “try”

wants to be braver. he’s not going back, but still needs to calmly coax himself further and further into the light, out into the open (“we’ll be alright”)

Spreading you open

Is the only way of knowing you

(can anyone else hear “spread thin” like a whisper under “spreading”? or am i imagining things.)

“you” is back - the only way of knowing “you” is to spread them open - the physical

to spread someone open - very literal, don’t need to paint the picture, or to lay bare, to lay it all out

⟶ “you” as himself - the only way of knowing who i am is by doing this: writing this album, performing these songs, letting others listen in and form their own interpretations, let this world grow where i’m laid bare and OPEN and exist as this person who has issues, who is angry, who doesn’t know who he is a lot of the time, but is still so happy to be here - let it spread and let it all circle back to me so i can grow deeper into myself

We'll be a fine line

We'll be alright

“we” = h & self, h & lover, h & fans

collectiveness from tpwk

(notes on a piano sounding like drops, like he’s emerged from the water and dripping dry)

SYNTHESIS

Everything about this song is plural. Personal pronouns are all over the place. I, you, her, we. The sound is incredibly layered, with Harry’s own voice echoing through its verses like he’s singing to himself in an empty cave. Meanings can be attached to every word like it’s a wax tablet used too many times. What Harry has said in interviews for once holds pretty true to the actual meaning, in my opinion.

“It felt like it described to me the process of making it and how the album felt in terms of the different kinds of songs on it.” (Capital FM)

This can mean a lot of things, and I think it means all of the things, of course. It means Fine Line is a summary of all of his emotions he visited on the album, of the things he’s laid bare. And it means that the actual process was also described, as one that can be frustrating and challenging, with added industry shit.

Harry has expressed straightforward gratefulness to his label for "leaving (him) alone” while making the album and that speaks volumes. This time, he had the chance to make his art without the constant interference of a label, which meant he could weave in criticism as well. “Put a price on emotion” is first and foremost a critique on the industry. It’s the first line of the song, setting the tone for the interpretation of this song is about the risks I took while making this album. It involves criticism on an industry that creates such an atmosphere that only a certain type of music and artist breaks through or can be successful, that limits people in their personal expression. Convinces them that it’s better that way. That it’s better to hide who they love because the general public won’t accept them. That it’s better to create a song about a fake emotion than be honest. Harry loves writing songs and being on stage, but it’s taken a while for him to be fully comfortable there as a solo artist and bloom into the person that could make Fine Line. He loves his career, but it’s also limited his freedom in ways beyond our comprehension, and it’s exploited him to the point where he didn’t know who he was, in ways that have clearly taken a toll on his mental wellbeing. To a point where he finishes this album reassuring himself, most of all, that everything will be alright.

That process of making Fine Line obviously includes Harry confronting emotions he hadn’t before. He has stated that he experienced the highest highs and the lowest lows while making it. There are things he hates, he was fighting but doesn’t want to (anymore), uncertainties he was trying to figure out but had to accept he couldn’t, risks he still doesn’t know he can take without shaking. At the centre of it all is this sense of “knowing you.” The different personal pronouns in the song paint a fractured picture, which is ultimately deliberate. That the “you” Harry is devoted to and can hate sometimes doesn’t line up with “her,” that the end focus does seem to be this “you” that is mentioned in the same breath as “man” and “temptress,” forming the “we” together with “I”.

After having songs like Lights Up, She, Falling and even TPWK, one of the central themes on the album has undoubtedly been self-discovery, in all its pain and glory. There are no female pronouns on the album besides, obviously, in She, and then here, in Fine Line. She is about a man living with a woman “just in his head”, who “sleeps in his bed while he plays pretend.” It is very clearly a trans narrative, the story of someone struggling to put into words what they’re experiencing in terms of gender. To a point that they fantasise about running away. Fine Line brings the ideas of knowing what it all means, which Lights Up kicks off (“do you know who you are?”), Falling deepens (“what am I now?”) and Treat People With Kindness turns on its head (“I don’t need all the answers”), together. Harry is still doubtful, and the questions asked earlier in the album haven’t disappeared, but he has accepted that “some things we’ll never know.” His aim, however, is still “knowing you.”

To have Fine Line, as the summary of these emotions of self-growth and self-discovery, echo that one female pronoun, speaks volumes. It is a direct reference to She, to that story about gender. “Her” in this song refers to “she (who) lives in daydreams with (him).” The one who still only fully comes out when they’ve had a drink. The one he’s still working to include in who he is, as he tries to figure out who he is, all of it. The song where he sings in falsetto, just like on Fine Line. Of which he sang the first verse an octave lower live at the forum, switching between those voices, those perspectives. That’s also why “you” in this song is also Harry to me. We get this fractured sense of self, this “I” and “you” conversing over a drink, this “you” Harry is devoted to and wants to figure out. “You” and “I” form “we” and all of them are Harry. The lines are blurry on purpose, there is no way to figure out where “you” ends and “I” begins.

“You sunshine, you temptress” is the most enigmatic line in that respect, and to me blurs those lines even more between the pronouns. “You” is suddenly also identified by a female noun. And no this isn’t about some kind of love triangle. “Sunshine” aligns with all the odes to his lover in the rest of the album. So what does that mean? That there are multiple “you”s in this song, meaning that Harry is addressing both his lover and a temptress? So “her” he’ll get to thinking of, the only other female pronoun used in the song, is identified as a temptress, but tempting to do what? To take risks? And no I won’t forget the “man, I can hate you sometimes,” where "man” is not a casual interjection but an identifier of “you.”

Or is it an echo of “the light” from Golden’s “bring me back to the light” and Light’s Up’s “step into the light”? So that the “sunshine” symbolises being in the clear, being out of the darkness running through his heart, the darkness caused by not knowing who you are. “You sunshine,” you beacon of light. “You temptress,” risk-taker and source of anxiety. You, one I need to spread open to figure out, to know about, source of happiness and despair, one I’m devoted to but also hate. You, man, you, temptress. You there, in the mirror looking back at me.

All of you, and myself included, we’ll be a fine line. And we’ll be alright.

This song is about all of that. The self in art, the self on its own, the other, the journey, the chances, the fears, the passion. Hope. Reassurance. Confidence. And, most importantly, that everything will be alright in the end.

read all my lyric analyses here

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thatgirlwritingficsatnight · 4 years ago

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Gift exchange

It’s Christmas Eve, and you’ve forgotten about your Christmas company party. Even worse you forgot to get a gift for the “not so secret Santa” - your company’s tradition. Wanna top it? Make it even worse? No problem. The person you were supposed to get a gift for? Your crush. Defsoul - the most talented, kindest and hottest person alive. What are you going to do now?

pairing: Lim Jaebeom (Defsoul) x reader

genre: smut, fluff, Jaebeom is a producer, Y/N is a manager

warnings: smut: daddy kink, light choking, ass play; foul language (please don’t read it if you’re not old enough)

words: 4989

A/N: TFW you try to write a GOT7 reaction, and you end up with one-shot. I know I’m kinda late with whole christmas theme but i wrote it last night and figured out I could post it anyway.

***

You barely got to shut your eyes before your alarm tore you up from your dreams. It was nine in the morning, and you went to sleep at six AM because of your work. You groaned as you shuffled in bed cursing your job, three hours of sleep was not enough for anyone. Being manager of K-pop girl group was hard enough but being the manager in December when there was award show after award show and festivals - that was a nightmare. To other people December was equal to Christmas, gifts, parties, New Year's Eve but to you, it was synonymous with constant state of tiredness, your biggest wish right now was to spent Christmas break alone, just you and your bed. You sighed as you dragged yourself to shower. Girls had only slept for 5 hours, and you felt bad for them — not only were they invited to each award show that existed they also just have had a comeback. You could see how exhausted they were and yet your superiors still pushed for them to go to some stupid TV show on Christmas Eve. You got yourself ready and went to pick them up and get them to set.

The recording went smoothly, and you were already daydreaming about coming home early and passing out on your bed. It was six PM already, but you still had to drive girls home and step into the office for a bit. You sighed you'd be home eight PM at best - well it was still better than coming home at two or three AM. You were about to go and thank everyone for their hard work when your phone vibrated. It was your best friend and coworker.

"Hey Inha. What's up?"

"I wanted to check if you remember about the company party tonight."

You hit your forehead and groaned.

"OMG! You forgot! Have you bought a gift at least?"

"No..." you whined. You wanted to die. You had so much work lately that you've absolutely forgotten about that party — it was for staff only and each year you'd drew lots to pick the person you were supposed to give a gift to. It wasn't even secret Santa your boss simply came to conclusion that gift exchange would help out with forming friendships...

"Girl... Do you at least remember who you drew?"

Of course you remembered. How could you not. This was your lucky year, you got Defsoul the hottest, kindest and most talented person working for your label. You had a small crush on him since that day he gave up his coffee for you. You were falling asleep standing while girls were recording their vocals, and he chuckled at you before telling you to sit by him and drink some coffee. It probably meant nothing to him but that was one of the most stressful weeks in your life, and you weren't sleeping at all during that time — ITZY were about to make a debut, and you couldn't stop worrying over it. You remember how touched you were by this simple gesture, after all no one ever gave you coffee, usually you were the one getting it for other people. His looks certainly didn't help with your hopeless crush. He was H O T and not even simply hot, more like "I-look-like-an-idol" hot. He had a black mullet, piercing under his eye, he also had his nose and ears pierced to make matters worse for you he also had most hypnotizing almost feline-like eyes. Honestly you wondered why didn't he become an idol with a face and talent like that. After that one time, he would buy you a coffee whenever he had seen you and you two became somewhat close - you'd swing over his studio when girls had to train and talk about everything and nothing. He told you about his cats, his favorite restaurants, his passion for taking pictures and well you mostly told him about your job since you basically didn't have any private life - it really felt pathetic. He even took your photo once - telling you that the picture would help him later when he would be looking for inspiration (it is a mystery till this day how you haven't fainted that evening). One day you were waiting for girls to finish up their dance practice and fell asleep on one of the benches — it was difficult day for you since you haven't slept for twenty hours already (you had to fight off some crazy sasaengs and didn’t sleep whole night keeping an eye on their dorm — some would say you were overdoing it, but to you members of ITZY were like your little sisters). You woke up in his studio on his couch. He carried you there while you were asleep and tucked you in, covering you with his jacket. You were extremely embarrassed, apologetic and thankful at the same time. He chuckled at you before saying that it was okay and forced you to promise that you'd oversleep to work the very next day. Inha claimed he had a crush on you since he never treated her with the same kindness or anyone really. But you knew better, he was a good colleague. A good, extraordinarily attractive colleague you wanted to kiss and lick and...

"Hello? Earth to Y/N??" your friend snapped you from your thoughts.

"I have to go Inha! Thank you for reminding me! Love you!" You checked the time, there was no way you'd manage to drive girls back, buy a gift, get ready for a party and do all that without being late. You sighed you will have to improvise. You drove off girls and came back rushing straight to your apartment. The party started at 10 PM and you had to shower, somehow fix your sleep-deprived face and figure out how you're going to apologize to Def... You were home a few minutes before 8 rushing into your bedroom - at least you knew what you were going to wear. That would be the most expensive, or more like the only expensive piece of clothing you had — a birthday gift from girls. It was an oversized tuxedo jacket from Alexander Wang and you haven't worn it yet. You tried it on, it had quite deep cleavage, and exposed a lot of your legs, but you figured it would be ok for tonight. You smoothed out black velvety material before stepping out of it. You still had to shower and do your makeup. An hour later you were looking at yourself in the mirror — the mask Inha got you really helped out with bags under your eyes. You did good with makeup as well: it was soft brownish smoky eye, orange toned lipstick and some shimmers here and there — you actually looked healthy and well rested (a true Christmas miracle really). You looked even better after getting in your outfit — Ryunjin was right, the tuxedo like dress fitted your vibe. You even wore some black heels which didn't often happen since you always chose comfort over looks when at work.

Fortunately you got to the party on time even though you couldn't catch a taxi for twenty minutes or so. People inside were already mingling and drinking, and you decided to grab something to drink before looking for Def. You located a small table with champagne in the corner of the room. You downed two glasses as quick as you got there, and were already grabbing a third one when a voice spoke up startling you so much you jumped a little.

"Rough day?" Defsoul was standing next to you, whiskey in his hand, smirking at you. You immediately blushed and gawked at him. He was so handsome it was simply unfair. This man clearly woke up today and chose violence. He was wearing a silky black shirt — and it was quite unbuttoned, so you had a chance of seeing his broad chest (you were currently having a heart attack), and slacks he also styled his hair so that his forehead was exposed with one defiant streak of hair falling onto his brow bone. You wanted to groan. You fucked up — this could've been your chance to get him to like you more...

"Y/N? Are you alright?" he was genuinely concerned, and here you were, basically salivating and staring at him like a starved, nasty man. That was so embarrassing. You cleared your throat and looked away.

"Yeah, sorry. I'm just really tired today..." He smiled at you warmly, and you wanted to punch yourself for not getting him something, anything.

"That's great!" You gave him a confused look, and he bit his lip nervously while scratching the back of his head. He was so cute you could kiss him. Well to be fair you felt like you could kiss him any time. Why...why did you have to forget that bloody gift...

"I mean it's not great that you're tired... It's just… ah, shit I suck at this. Here." He handed you a plastic card, and you read it absolutely puzzled. Lifetime pass for coffee with Jaebeom — it also had a cute chibi character that looked just like Def, except it had some cat ears.

"Now you can get coffee whenever you want. I mean I know you can have it whenever you want anyway, I just thought that maybe you'd like someone to get it with... I mean get it for you… It's ok if you don't like it really, oh by the way I'm Jaebeom, I don't know if I already told you my real name or not…" he was rambling, and you were screaming inside your head. That was so cute. So kind. You wanted to hug him and kiss him so badly. "Ah, shit. I really do suck at this." he said more to himself than to you. You finally looked at him and grinned.

"I love it." you said and his eyes turned into big orbs before light pink colored his cheeks.

"You do?"

"I do. It's a perfect gift." you smiled, your heart swelled with happiness. You could technically go on a date with him whenever you felt like with this handy piece of plastic. That is if he wouldn't start to hate you in the next few minutes for forgetting his present.

"I'm glad." he grinned and it took your breath away. How come he was so perfect? You got even more nervous looking at the gift from him.

"Ah... I was your not so secret Santa as well…" you started.

"Really? So what did you get me?" he was genuinely interested, and you wanted to go back in time and kill yourself for forgetting about this party. You looked up. His eyes were gleaming with curiosity — you were fucked.

"It's me! I'm your gift!" you joked and looked down to cover your nervousness. You were about to say that it was just a stupid joke and apologize before he spoke up.

"I love it." his voice was deeper than normally, and you looked up shocked by it. He was checking you out, his hungry eyes traveling up and down. You've never seen him like that. You could feel warmth spreading on your cheeks under his intense stare, a tight knot forming somewhere near your core in excitement.

"Y-you do?" your voice faltered, and he chuckled while moving closer to you. He smelled musky with a hint of citrus. Your legs were about to collapse under you.

"I do." he hummed he was so close you could feel the warmth radiating from him. His hand brushed against yours as he bent down to reach your ear. You were sure your skin was burning where he touched you. "So, tell me Y/N, when can I unwrap you?" his tone was dark and dangerous and when he straightened up you've seen this gleam in his eyes as he smirked. Your legs felt like made from putty and you'd collapse if his hand weren't already wrapped around your waist. You couldn't believe it was happening. Your heart was beating so hard it was about to spring off your chest — you were wondering if he could hear it. You certainly could even though blood ringed in your ears. You felt your throat going dry and your panties getting moist.

"Def…" you started weakly. Shocked by your own voice — it sounded so needy.

"Call me Jaebeom.." he purred. "Would you like to go to my place? I don't think I can wait any longer to enjoy my gift…" You quavered from excitement, his voice was laced with a promise of sleepless night.

"Yes, let's go." you said and he smiled at you. You were sure you lost any oxygen you still had in your lungs at that moment. His hand left your waist, and you wanted to catch it and wrap yourself with it again. Instead, he grabbed your hand and interlocked your fingers with his, smiling at you sweetly before he led you outside. You couldn't focus on anything else, but his fingers wrapped around yours. His hand was warm, and he held you firmly, his skin soft and delicate. You managed to quickly catch a taxi and through whole drive Jaebeom's hand lazily travelled up and down your thigh. His gentle fingers sending sparks to your core every time he brushed the inside of your leg. You glanced at him, eyes filled with desire — he shivered, and it made you feel a different kind of excitement — you didn't know that you had this kind of effect on him. You got out of the taxi and his hand was instantly on yours, he was almost dragging you skipping every other step as he rushed upstairs to his apartment. He opened the door and let you in. Immediately three cats came in and brushed against your legs. You smiled softly.

"They like you.." Jaebeom murmured against your neck while taking off your coat for you, you gasped at the feeling, and he released low chuckle before he started planting soft kisses against your neck — each time his lips touched your skin your muscles clenched with anticipation. You couldn't wait any longer. You turned around and looked at him, his eyes were glued to your lips and excitement bubbled somewhere below your stomach.

"I waited so long for this..." he started but never got to finish as your lips were on his in a second. Even his lips felt like cotton, and you sighed against him when he kissed you back. He was clearly enjoying slow kisses. You grew impatient once again and licked his lower lip, he gave you access you asked for, and your tongue brushed against his hungrily. You could already feel how wet you were, arousal making your panties stick to you painfully. Jaebeom's hand travelled around your back dropping dangerously low now and then but never grabbing you — you really wanted him to hold you and take you roughly. Once again you grew impatient this night. You took his lower lip in between your teeth, you bit it hard and moaned. That seemed to make him lose his cool, he let out a growl that travelled straight to your core.

"Bad girl..." he said before he turned you around and pushed you against the wall so that your back was facing him. His tongue already on your earlobe, you sighed and shivered when he licked it and let out breaths against wet, sensitive skin. "I wanted to take it slowly, but you're so eager, so impatient…" he was purring into your ear, and you were aching down there more and more with each syllable.

"Jaebeom..." you moaned as you pressed your ass against him. He sucked some breath in when you pushed down against his hard length, his body working on its own accord, one hand already on your hips pressing you harder when the other one cupped your breast. This is not how he envisioned tonight, he thought that he'd at best confess his feelings not have you here crumbling in his hands while moaning his name. Your hips bucked against his by itself as soon as you felt how hard he was. His hand grabbed your clothed breast, and you regretted wearing anything. You wanted to feel him against you naked skin not through layers of clothing.

"Jaebeom-ah..." you moaned his name again, and he rewarded you with sucking on your neck — it was painful yet pleasant, and you almost forgot what you wanted to say before he licked the fresh mark and kissed it. "Didn't you say you wanted to unwrap me?" You said in weak voice still affected by his mouth on your neck. He laughed against your skin, and you thought that's how paradise would sound like.

"You really are impatient... do you want me to fuck you so bad?" he asked rubbing into you, his dick almost in pain from the friction.

"Yes...please..." you panted out, and he let out some animalistic sound upon hearing how needy you were. He made you face him and unbuttoned your tuxedo-like-dress before he tossed it somewhere behind him. You shivered under his stare. He pulled you into him and his hands immediately travelled to your ass, grabbing it and lifting you up without effort. He began kissing your jaw, neck, collarbones, and you tilted your head, so he could have better access. He carried you to his bedroom and laid you down carefully on the mattress before he took a step back. His sheets smelled just like him, and you sighed in pleasure, sinking deeply into his fragrance. He bit his lip seeing you in his bed, wearing nothing but lacy underwear. However, you didn't want just lay and wait, you got up and reached out to his own shirt undoing the buttons hastily, but he didn't let you, he was in control. He held your hands and pushed you back on bed. You bounced and your hair created a sort of crown, spreading around your face �� it emphasized your features even more, and Jaebeom felt as if he was making love to some kind of goddess. Your lips, eyes, hair, body everything was perfect. He wanted to taste you already.

"You need to ask me nicely." He smirked at you and you pouted a bit before a mischievous gleam appeared in your eyes. You let one of the straps fall from your shoulder and gave him an innocent look before taking off the other one as well. Just one move and Jaebeom would see your torso naked. He bit his lip unintentionally, when you pushed your breast closer while also moaning.

"Pleeeaaase... undress already and fuck me... daddy." He groaned - you'd be the end of him. He quickly tore any clothes that were on him leaving only his boxers on, and you stared him down hungrily. Saying he was beautiful was and understatement. He was perfect. His skin was light and smooth, it gleamed in the moonlight that illuminated the room through a small window located right above the headboard. It was still dim, but you could clearly see the outline of muscles on his stomach, and a tempting v line, waiting for you to be licked on his abdomen.

"Take off your bra." he ordered and you obediently followed. His eyes devoured your glistening breasts, two darker beads already hard and inviting him in. He licked his thumb and brushed it against your nipple watching intently for your reaction. You didn't disappoint him as you arched your back hungry for his touch. He took another one into his mouth, his tongue making circles around it for what felt like forever. The sound of his wet licks and your quickened breath feeling the silence of the room. You squeezed your legs looking for any kind of release, it didn't help much. Your core was aching and since you could only wait for him to bring you pleasure you closed your eyes and focused only on the sole path of his tongue. It was almost like a torture and Jaebeom seemed to enjoy it greatly, lazy licks, circles around your nipples, blowing cold air on them to hear your whines. And so when he finally sucked on your swollen nipple you moaned his name so loudly his neighbors could hear you. His dick twitched in his boxers. He couldn't wait for much long either, you were the most beautiful person he ever saw, and you were squirming under him, waiting for him to fuck you. He was honestly shocked he didn't take you against that wall in his hall when you pushed your ass against him. He smirked at you, he haven’t even fucked you yet and you were already having this kind of expression. His lips travelled from your breast lower and lower before his face hovered above your panties, hot breath on your wet, clothed pussy sending you almost over the edge. You looked down at him, his eyes were full of lust. He was so beautiful you felt like it was just a dream, not reality. When he pressed his nose against your wet folds you moaned again. He inhaled it a few times as if it was the most ravishing smell in the world.

"You smell so good I might go crazy." He actually was going crazy as his cock let out a bit of pre-cum only upon him smelling your pussy.

"Daddy... please..." you pleaded looking him in the eyes, he couldn't take it any longer. In one swift move he tore the panties off you, they were soaked, and he sniffed them one last time before throwing them out. He took off his own underwear, and knelt between your legs his cock in his hand already.

"You're so wet for me. Such a good girl, I'm going to fuck you so good." he purred out, and you could go off his words only. He put on condom quickly and teased your entrance before sliding into you slowly. He was watching your face intently as he didn't want to cause you pain.

"Just don't move for a second, you're so big I need to get used to the stretch." It was painful a and pleasant at the same time - the way he filled you up. He didn't buck his hips as you asked, instead he kissed your lips, your jaw, neck, and you kissed him back with passion. Soon he started rocking into you and you moaned into his mouth.

"Harder." you managed to say between the panting and kissing. He straightened up and increased the tempo, sweat building on his forehead.

"Harder..." you said and his hand went to your throat while he almost crushed into you. He choked you lightly, and you felt the orgasm building already.

"Daddy... harder..."

"You dirty girl. On all fours." You obediently followed his order and soon he was fucking you doggy style, his hand spanking you lightly. "You like that? You like when daddy takes you hard?" His voice was so low you shivered under him.

"Yes, daddy." you moaned out when his huge dick filled you with each thrust.

"You're so dirty and good to your daddy. I will reward you and play with your other hole." Before you could say anything he spat on your ass and his finger danced around the other entrance. Just that was enough for you to see white. Your toes curled and your head went back, you screamed his name like it was the only thing keeping you alive, and you could feel how he twitched inside you when you clenched around him in orgasm spasm.

"Y/N, ah... I'm cumming, I'm…" he said through gritted teeth while pounding into you. You both reached your highs and fell onto the bed. He discarded the condom and started kissing your back lazily.

"Do you want to shower together?" he asked.

"Yes, but I don't think I have enough energy to go for another round…" you said while turning his way. He was looking at you lovingly, his expression completely fucked out. He was beautiful, the most handsome you've ever seen him actually. You sighed when his fingers brushed off hair from your face in sweet gesture.

"That's ok, I'll just shower you and we can go to sleep." You nodded, and he took your hand and guided you to his bathroom. He switched on the shower and pulled you under the water when it was warm already. He was so delicate with you, soaping your body, shampooing your head. You smiled at him warmly, and he chuckled.

"You're really cute." he said with a smile after making and weird shapes out of your shampooed hair.

"Stop it, I'll blush." you said while getting under the water, he was quickly spooning you, kissing your back almost with devotion.

"Good, you're even cuter when you blush."

You both towelled yourself dry and Jaebeom even brushed your hair for you before pulling you back to bed. You cuddled your face into his chest and he closed his arms around you. You didn't know if it was one-night stand only, but you'd worry about your possibly broken heart in the morning since his scent was already inviting you to the dreamworld.

You woke up to some rumbling. You opened your eyes and shot up, fear washing over you — that wasn't your bedroom. Memories of last night came next, and you fell back to the sheets squealing quietly into his pillow. That's when the realization hit you. What if it was just one-night stand, and you were rolling around his bed happily in love like an idiot? You sighed but before you could do anything, the man in question came to the bedroom smiling at you warmly.

"You finally woke up sleepyhead." He sat next to you and bend down to kiss your cheek. You looked down. "What's wrong? Have I done something?" He looked concerned.

"I.. no." You said sitting up, and he raised his brow on you. Ugh, he was looking great wearing a plain gray hoodie. You sighed.

"Was that one just for one night? If it was a one-night stand tell me now before I do something stupid."

"One-night stand?" He looked at you offended. "One-night stand?! Do you even know for how long I've been crushing on you? It was few years of my desperate attempts to ask you out, buying you coffee, looking for you constantly. Hell, I even made Yugyeom exchange the stupid lottery draw with me, so that I could give you that card. I actually thought that would helped me out with asking you out. One-night stand?! Jesus, Y/N, he made me basically his slave for a day, and you're asking me if it's one-night stand?" He was angry, and you looked at him shocked, you have never seen him like that. "Do you want this to be one-night stand?!" he raised his voice again.

"No!" you answered him immediately.

"No?! Great, then you can... wait you said no?" He cleared his throat, and you could actually see him smiling like an idiot before he cleared it again. "Well… good because I made us lunch already, and it would go to waste otherwise." He tried to act cool. You giggled at him and pushed him down before sitting on top of him.

"You're cute." You said and he blushed looking away.

"I'm not."

"Yes you are. You are the cutest actually." He groaned in response getting even more red, and you giggled once again. It was the first time you got him to blush so much, usually it was just light pink appearing on the apples of his cheeks. You kissed his face leaving pecks all over it, he chuckled before speaking again.

"I don't want this to be one-night stand. I like you I was actually planning on asking you out yesterday."

"You were?"

"I was. So would like to go out with me?" he wiggled his brows at you and you grinned before nodding.

"Mmm. I'd love to." you answered and he pulled you for a lazy kiss.

"Come, I prepared some food for you. It's hardly festive, but it's something"

"I'm sure it's great. I just need to put something on myself first."

"You can have my hoodie and sweats." he said while looking through his cabinet. "Here." He handed you clothes and blushed once again mumbling that he will wait for you in the kitchen. He got embarrassed — that was just too cute.

You slipped in his clothes, his smell wrapping around you. You got out of the bedroom only to be greeted by three cats purring and brushing against your legs. You smiled and petted them, scratching them on their chins. Jaebeom was just standing and staring at you, still not believing his luck. You were wearing his blouse, it was hanging on you like a dress basically and his heart ached at this picture. You looked up and grinned.

"They like me!"

"I'm pretty sure they're going to like you more than they like me." He chuckled. "Now come, let's eat."

You nodded and entered his kitchen, there was kimchi jjigae and rice prepared for both of you. You smiled and sat down already salivating because of the delicious smell.

"Merry Christmas Y/N." He said looking up from his dish.

"Merry Christmas Jaebeom." You smiled at him lovingly. "So what did Yugyeom made you do?"

"Don't even ask." He said and you giggled. Let's just say you didn't get to spend the Christmas break alone in the bed like you wished.

#jaebeom fanfic #Jaebeom fanfiction #jaebeom x reader #jaebeom x you #lim jaebeom #lim jaebum fanfic #lim jaebeom fanfiction #jaebeom smut #lim jaebeom smut #got7 smut #got7 scenarios #got7 imagines #got7 reactions #jaebeom daddy #got7 #GOT7 fanfiction #got7 fanfic #jaebeom scenarios #thatgirlsfic

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smol-and-grumpy · 3 years ago

Note

Hello hello, there! I've been wanting to do this for quite a while but ever since I turned 21 life's been going INSANE for me and it seems like I never get a break to come by and say what I wanna say, but here I am now! So brace yourself because I'm going to say everything I wanted to during these last months but never had time to do so! I've always been a kid that was obsessed with books and reading but I never was the fanfiction type of person, it seemed like every time I tried to read one it would just made me upset because it just felt like the characters were always SO OOC and the storylines always seemed to be the same with the same annoying stereotyped readers that bottered me so much (perhaps I was just dumb and didn't knew yet how to actually look for stories and always ended up giving up before founding the ones that were for me), so it was never "my thing". I've been a Supernatural fan ever since I was 12, and a few months ago I was just missing Dean SO BAD and I desperately needed some distraction from my current life, so I decided to give fanfiction a try again (best decision I've ever made). I was feeling in a very specific mood (don't even ask why, my mind sometimes just get in very weird maladaptive daydreaming moods that I CANNOT explain) I felt like reading something linda "soldier" like, and that's how I've found Home To You. OH.MY.FUCKING.GOD. WHAT WAS THAT? NO, LIKE REALLY? I've read it SO GODDAMN FAST and ALL AT ONCE because once I started I just COULDN'T STOP IT! Everything pulled me in the story so much, the characters, the plot, the fantastic job you did with the reader, the goddamn long ass slow burn (and I mean that in the nicest way possible because I LOVE ME some slow burn). Do I even need to say that after finishing this one I absolutely binged every single one of your works? BECAUSE I DID (and now I regret it because I'm ADDICTED to your stories but I've read everything already 😭😭). Your writing it's so captivating and entertaining! I'm not exaggerating when I say that I'm IN LOVE with your stories and I just HAD to come here to let you know how absolutely fantastic you and your fanfics are! From now on I'll just be in my seat waiting for the uploads of the new stories (which by the way, they're AWESOME, I honestly could go on in another whole huge ass ask just to talk about what I'm loving in each one of them) and make sure to come here to talk to ya and give the feedback your deserve! Take care darling and have and amazing day! 💘 (This ask was supposed to be sent almost one hour ago but of course Jensen had to post that video and completely kill every single functional braincell out of my head, so the delay is his fault!) -🐿️

Oh my 🐿

You got me bawling when I first read your ask, and not gonna lie, I didn’t answer right away because I wanted to come back into my inbox to read it over and over and over again. It came at the right time too, because I’m in need of some serious pick me ups lately.

Thank you. Seriously, THANK YOU. I can not say this enough… you made one gal really happy. I feel honored that you think so highly of my writing. Home To You is one of my fave babies. And I know that it was soooooo slow, but it was all worth it, right?

The thing with OOC characters is just I think the way you interpret it in your head. In my head, Dean’s just like the way I write him, and I am humbled to know that I’m not too far off in the eyes of some readers 😅

Yes, please, come by more often. Scream at me, swoon with me, I would be so happy about it.

I hope you’re having a great weekend, my sweet 🐿

Love you ❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️

#nat answers #feedback

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nose-bandaid · 4 years ago

Text

a hug per dollar

hello! it's me, the platonic anon from before... may i request a non-romantic, changgu & gender-neutral reader, coffee/study date? and maybe you could work in a reassuring hug 🥺 thank you so much 💛

Yeo One (Changgu) x (gender neutral) Reader | Platonic fluff + comfort?! | 1.8k words

synopsis: overworking can sometimes be an easy, but terrible habit to fall into, but luckily, changgu is there to drag you out when you do.

a/n: lol i think i projected this to have 1.2k but it ended up with 1.8 but i am not complaining !!!! to my dear platonic anon, sorry this took so long ksdhfkdsj i hope you enjoy it !! i may or may not have done an uno reverse on stud.hui.o fanatic because now it is the reader who's overworking BAM 💛

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"Don't you think we've been here for long enough?"

Your hand stopped writing the flurry of notes and you looked at your friend, who peered back at you over his laptop. "Changgu, it's literally only been..."

You flipped your phone over to look at the time on its display and faltered when you realized just how late into the day it was. "I guess we have been here for a while."

"Which is exactly why I think we should—"

"But I'm not ready to leave yet!" You snapped back, immediately backing off when you realized how harsh your voice was.

"You didn't get much sleep last night, did you?" He pressed on and you buried your face back into the piles of work laid in front of you.

"We don't talk about that either."

He let you be and the two of you went back to working in silence for the next while until Changgu eventually got up from his seat. Your eyes followed him as he stretched and let out a sigh. "I'm gonna go to the bathroom."

"Okay." You replied, and returned to your work.

=====

Not long after, a juice box slid into your view and you looked up at Changgu who returned after his bathroom break that took much longer than a usual bathroom break would've taken. You quirked an eyebrow in his direction.

"You got juice from the bathroom?"

He laughed and you took note of the other juice box in his hand — the exact same flavour as yours. "Of course I did. They added vending machines in the bathroom recently, didn't you know that?"

You decided to play along. "Is that so? No, I didn't know that. But do enlighten me as to why you would ever trust a vending machine located in the bathroom."

He laughed at your small jest. "Nah, I just went on an adventure to grab us some fuel." He dropped back into his seat and let out a relieved hum as he stared at his laptop. "After finishing that stupid essay I think I deserved the treat."

"You know, if you're done working you can always head back first. I'm fine on my own."

He shook his head adamantly at your offer. "This is our study session, you know? It's a we thing," he emphasized that with a point to the table. "So I'm not leaving until you're also done."

You sent him a small smile in appreciation and returned to your textbook, taking a small sip from the juice box as you did. It was refreshing and in the back of your mind, you wondered how he knew this was your favourite flavour. You didn't recall ever telling him.

"Though I think you've done more than enough work for today."

You didn't miss the next thing he muttered quietly.

"Look, Changgu, I'll just finish this chapter and we can call it today, okay?" You desperately held up a finger to assist in your pleading.

"One chapter and one chapter only." He reluctantly gave in, deciding to get a head start on another assignment in the meanwhile. Once again, you settled back into a comfortable silence, listening to the distant voices of others in the library.

You ended up finishing that chapter quicker than you initially thought you would and it flared up a new flame of determination within you. You could cram in a few more chapters then, right? You'll get them done in no time, especially with the flow you had now.

Agreeing with yourself, you got started right away.

You're pretty sure Changgu noticed when you flipped the page again.

And again.

Surely he's noticed the way you're slouched over a bit more now, the way your eyes were drooping and your gaze became unfocused. The way you've hardly touched the bag of snacks since he opened it. But you kept on going. Your determination knew no limits and you kept on going despite all the rational part of you that screamed at you to stop.

...Now, where did you leave off before you started daydreaming?

Right, at the end of this paragraph. You returned to staring at the mundane words in the textbook. You swore you were almost finished with this page but you also told yourself that what felt like hours ago. No matter how many times you read the same sentence over and over again, the words never seemed to stick in your mind. Your hand couldn't figure out what to write and what to leave out. All of it seemed important and you cursed the way your next exam weighed so much and yet gave you such vague preparation instructions. If only you had started studying earlier... but wasn't one week enough? Maybe you just weren't fit for this? Probably, because —

Changgu placed his hand onto yours. He gently pulled the pen out of your grasp and gestured for you to look at him.

"Let's take a break, you have no say in it. Seeing you like this makes me exhausted, I can't take this anymore."

No matter how many times you've drilled into your mind that it was absolutely not okay to take a break, the moment you heard the words from someone else, your composure crumbled.

You let out a deep sigh and let your weight rest on the table. "Yeah let's."

Changgu helped you pack your work away after cleaning up his own and waited until you were fully ready. When you slid the chair back to its former home, he held out a hand for you to take and you happily took a place by his side.

"Are you going to take me on another adventure?" You playfully asked, already feeling a little better now that your work was tucked away.

He shrugged. "Honestly, I had no clue where I was going to take you 'cause I didn't think you'd actually stop studying. But sure! Let's make this an adventure."

Stepping outside, you realized how much nicer it was to have a change of scenery. It was already late afternoon, the sun shining brightly above, engulfing you in a pleasant kind of warmth.

You sighed inwardly, this would've been more relaxing if your mind would just stop drifting back to all the work you still to be done. Hadn't you done enough? You worked so hard for the past who-knows-how-many-hours and yet it only left you unsatisfied and even more stressed.

Maybe it just wasn't enough.

A gentle bop on your head brought you out of your thoughts and you stared at Changgu, his hand still raised from bonking your bad thoughts away.

"Stop thinking so much." He crossed his arms and looked at you pointedly.

"Huh?"

Squinting his eyes, his face leaned into yours, getting closer and closer, and you found yourself edging away from the intrusion. Just as quickly as it started, he suddenly disappeared, straightening his back again and letting out a huff.

"Just as I thought."

"What?" You asked again, still lost.

"You're thinking bad things about yourself again! Stop that."

"How did you know?"

He playfully punched your shoulder at that. "I'm your best friend, you think I wouldn't notice these things? You always have this expression on your face when you're beating yourself up. Looks kinda stupid."

Your mouth gaped at his remark. "Hey!'

"I'm kidding, you never look stupid," he smiled and continued. "But what is stupid is you thinking that you're not good enough because you can't keep up with everything that's going on. Can you really blame yourself if some uncontrollable force decided to dump an unreasonable amount of work on you all at once? You're doing your best, which is one, really paying off because I swear you've covered like a billion chapters today. And two, is extremely cool — I heard the group studying behind us gush about how hard you were working and guess what?"

"...What?" You asked hesitantly, still trying to recover from your friend's spiel.

Changgu grabbed your shoulders to keep your attention. "I also think you're really really cool!!" He announced loudly, capturing the attention of a mother and her daughter nearby. They walked away after the initial surprise.

Your lip trembled, not even having it within you to be embarrassed by his public confession. Instead, you were overwhelmed by his kindness. "Changgu..."

He pulled you into a hug and you basked in his presence. The faint smell of fresh laundry lingered on his hoodie and you melted into his comfort. "You're doing great, and you'd be doing even better if you let yourself breathe for a moment. As overwhelming as it may feel, the only thing that's going to bring you down is yourself if you keep on going at this rate — not your work." He gently scolded before he pulled away and cupped your face, eyes boring into yours.

"Got that?"

You nodded hesitantly. "Yes."

"I don't know... that wasn't really convincing..."

You laughed lightly and pushed his hands away from you. "I got it, I got it, Changu. Thank you so much." You found yourself much more relaxed after your talk. "From studying with me to buying me snacks and comforting me... aargh, I appreciate it."

Changgu simply gave you a bright smile. "Anything for you."

That was all he said, but those 3 words were enough to express just how much you meant to each other.

"Besides, I don't think of it as a chore, any time spent with you is great."

You pouted. "You're too good for me, seriously. How can I make it up to you?"

In all honesty, you expected him to dismiss the question, but instead, Changgu's eyes wandered off as he placed a finger on his chin. "Well, I did notice that my favourite drink is on sale when I passed by that cafe on the way here..."

You sent him an amused look. "The juice wasn't enough?"

"Are you telling me to pass on a sale that takes a whole dollar off?"

Once again, you found yourself playing along with his act and your eyes widened. "Oh geez, you're right, we can't miss out on that." Pushing Changgu from behind, you ushered him forward. "Let's get moving! We spent so much time in the library the shop's going to close by the time we get there."

Changgu chuckled as you caught up and fell into step with his movements. "I'm glad to see that you're back to normal."

"And I'm glad we get to save a buck on overpriced drinks. Thanks for everything, Changgu." You swiftly replied and he sent a smile your way.

"Anytime."

#newskynet #kdiner #pentagon #pentagon yeo one #yeo one #yeo changgu #pentagon x reader #changgu x reader #yeo one x reader #pentagon fluff #changgu fluff #yeo one fluff #nose-bandaid

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wellbafineline · 5 years ago

Text

official

(1.7k) / feedback! / other writings!

a.n. hiii, this is my first full length fic, no one asked for this but this is the concept that i’ve been daydreaming about so here you go :) hope you enjoy and feedback is always appreciated <3

how you and harry make things official

You'd been ‘seeing’ Harry for about 3 months, he’d been introduced to you by your mutual friends in London. The only thing was, you weren't really together, not as far as you were concerned at least. Your and Harry's relationship was seemingly casual, you hooked up, slept over at each other's places, ordered take out and watched shitty reality tv every Friday night while complaining about your shitty weeks at work (after hearing about her for three months he’d began to really hate Rachel from your office) and most other things people in relationships did. Just you guys did it without the labels and strings.

And you'd had no problem with that at first, you understood. He was busy, wasn't always around, or had the most reliable schedule. But as you approached 4 months of whatever you and Harry had going on, you started to get more questions from both of your friends about the more intimate and logistical details of your relationship. You had begun to get pretty good at getting around them or changing the subject, but that didn't mean the nagging feeling in your gut went away when they asked.

That's exactly what's happening currently, you’d gone out with your two best friends to a bar in the city. They’d been begging for a catch up for a week, but you'd been at Harry's for the week because he wanted ‘all the time he could get’ before he had to go to LA for a couple of weeks to put finishing touches on his album.

But now you were all squished together into a tiny booth in the corner of the bar, and you were listening to your friend Lindsey complain about the new project she was doing in work and how it was way below her pay grade when Destiny jumps in when she’s finished turning herself to face you

‘So, how’s your boyfriend’ she asked you. Knowing she emphasized the ‘boyfriend’ to get you to spill if you and Harry made it official yet you sighed.

‘He's not my boyfriend, you know that, no strings’

‘Yeah I know that, but I also know you’re delusional. You just spent a week straight at his house and you're both not seeing other people so… what's the harm in labeling it.’ she trailed off ‘do you want that with him?’ Lindsey asks when you don't start talking

‘Of course, I want that, at least think I do, just what we've got going on is good, y’know, there's no pressure on it and it's easy’ you sigh ‘plus he’s Harry and there's a lot more that comes with being in a relationship with him than just anyone else’

‘So find someone else, no drama, sorted,’ Lindsey says ‘no-i- that's not what I meant, just meant it'll be harder’ ‘have to ask yourself if this is what you want, you two can't go on like this forever’ she explains ‘And if it is, talk to him, now backing out this time, ‘cause you said you were gonna talk to him about this like a month ago too.’

‘I know, and i will, promise this time, but he's gone for a couple of weeks anyway don't want to do it over facetime so it'll have to wait till he's home’

After your meet up with Lindsey and Destiny you spent a lot more time than you probably should've thinking about what to do, about you, about harry and about your relationship with harry, if you can even call it that.

He gets back from LA on Friday now, it was your plan to go over to his house, order take out, watch a film or help him unpack like you two always do when he gets back from long periods away because he ‘missed you the most and needs to see you asap.’

But this time you were going to talk to him, no chickening out.

You’d agreed to meet Harry at his place on Friday, you finished work around 3pm and he wasn't going to be home till at least 7 maybe 8pm. But you went over anyway letting yourself in with a key he gave you about a month ago saying ‘f’ emergencies love, or when your flat mate’s getting on your fuckin’ nerves’.

Truthfully you didn’t know what you were going to do at Harry's for 4-ish hours alone but you figured it was better than sitting anxiously at home or at your desk at work. At least it gave you time to think, make a plan of action, because as you'd realised sometime in the past two weeks, there was a very real chance that this was all Harry wanted, that this is where you’d end. Because there was no way you could lay it all out for him just to go back to glorified friends with benefits.

Leaving your coat and work bag at the door when you arrived, you make your way to his kitchen to make some tea before getting comfortable on the couch in the living room, appreciating what you assume is the calm before the storm.

At around 7pm, exactly when he promised, you hear a car pull up the driveway and what can only be Harry's heavy footsteps in the hallway. ‘Love, you here, got taken away on the way home’ he called out as you got up to go meet him in the kitchen.

‘Mm, missed you’ you reached up to peck his cheek ‘but I missed this more’ as you started taking the containers out of the take out bag ‘but I missed this more’

‘Heyyy!, not true and you know it.’

‘Yeah, keep telling yourself that.’

‘C’mon, jus’ shut up and eat.’

You’d been like this for a few hours. He was laying on the couch with you on top of him. Your head on his chest, with the tv playing in the background. Harry was drifting off to sleep, jetlag finally catching up to him but you were wide awake. Sighing a bit too loudly and moving to get up you suddenly felt a pair of hands gripping to your waist.

‘Where y’ goin’ love’ Harry murmurs, his eyes still closed. ‘Just to get some water, go back asleep.’ You answered him but he didn't let go of you leaving you sat in his lap with you looking up at you from his position laying down.

‘Are y’ alright, seem, um, stiff’ He questioned, you could tell he knew something was off and he was harry so he probably wouldn't give up till you told him, so now or never you thought. No chickening out.

‘um, Harry, I've, um, been meaning to talk to you about this for a while’ You started, pausing after to properly think of how to do this, you hadn't thought it’d go like this in your head. You thought it’d be in his kitchen maybe bedroom but definitely not when you were basically straddling him on the couch.

His voice interrupted your thoughts, prompting you to carry on ‘C’mon spit it out love, what's wrong.’

‘Nothings wrong, well I don't think anything wrong, i- just. Harry what are we?’ You finally just ripped the bandage off, thinking there was no point to really skip around it.

‘Oh, well,’ he paused. ‘We're us.’

‘No, H, I mean are we like, together’

‘Where's this comin’ from love’ as he started to stroke your thigh feeling that you were starting to back away from him, as much as you could at least.

‘Just, y’know, friends, people, are asking. We've been doing this for a while, H, bound to come up at some point’

‘Well, what do you want to do about it then, have t’ tell me, not a mind reader love.’ He chuckled.

‘Are we together, or I don't know can we be.’ After everything you’d done together, he still seems to make you nervous, both butterflies from being giddy and deathly terrified of his answer.

His reaction to that was not what you expected at all his face erupted into one of the biggest smiles you've ever seen him wear. ‘Like boyfriend and girlfriend?’ He grins at you

‘Yeah, I guess, yeah like boyfriend and girlfriend.’ You’d moved back to lay on him, and now your face was buried in his neck, even with the smile on his face the still small chance that this was the end was still eating at your nerves.

Harry sat up suddenly, with you now sitting in his lap he tightened his arms around your waist almost as if he knew you'd try to squirm out of his grasp, and tried to coax you to look at him.

‘Y’ askin me yo be ya boyfriend, babe?’ he's got a shit-eating grin on his face now and that's exactly the reaction you needed for the weight of rejection to be lifted off of you.

‘Guess I am, what's your answer.’

‘No no no, never actually asked me did ya can’t answer if y’ don't ask’

‘You're really making me do this h?’ You stared and raised your eyebrows at him.

‘Yeah, c’mon love thought there was somethin’ you wanted to ask me.’ You could tell he was enjoying this, and you tried to completely let your guard down and play along.

‘Okay, will you, Harry Styles, do me the honour of being my boyfriend?’ your voice was dripping with sarcasm but you both knew what you were asking was sincere.

‘Thought you’d never ask babe’ he said while his hand cupped your jaw moving your face to finally kiss you.

As you pulled away he was smiling at you, bigger than you’d seen him smile for a while. ‘Think I'm gonna be good at this boyfriend thing, don't you?’

‘Yeah I do’ you sighed as he lay back on the couch where you guys were sitting. You had your arms wrapped around his waist as he was tracing up and down your back. You really couldn’t remember what you were so nervous about 3 hours ago.

#harry styles blurb #harry styles x reader #harry styles fic #harry styles imagine #harry styles concept #harry blurb #harry fic #harry imagine #harry concept #boyfriend!harry #my writing

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littlestarofthewest · 5 years ago

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Gahd I love your kinky fics!! Pls can u do one with a younger femreader & arthur? Like they like each other but she's younger so he's hesitant to start but then just shows her how a man his age gets it done *wink wink* I'm not into the daddykink but I do like an age gap haha I know youve just done creampie (it was so daamn good!!) but pls pls creampie & dirty talk �� how Javier opened her up....I can imagine Arthur loving that 😂 ps. Honestly best fics out there! ♥️ Thanks for the prompts again!

Thank you for all the love, dear <3 I went through major writer’s block and nasty real-life stuff while writing this, so I hope it was worth the trouble.

Also dedicating this to @emily-strange who had a very similar request (you two should talk xD). Sorry I kept you waiting for so long (since freaking December).

Title: Young Love | Word Count: 9352 | Rating: Explicit!!! (18+)

Pairing: Arthur Morgan & female reader | Tags: angst and fluff and smut

Arthur has no idea what it is that makes you so different. Back when he and John rescued you, you were just a young girl that needed help, and by now, he wishes he would still feel about you this way.

For months, Arthur tried to treat you like Mary-Beth or Tilly, a young girl that could very well be his sister. It’s just that you make it so hard for him. You’re not naive and silly like some 19-year-olds Arthur met, and although you’re more on the shy side, you still have a way of teasing him with winks and smiles that shouldn’t affect him as much as they do.

In the beginning, Arthur fell headfirst into your trap. He rescued you, after all, so you tended to stick to him, and Arthur let you. You were easy to talk to, with a hunger for knowledge and a good sense of humor, not easily offended when he spoke out of tune.

When it became clear that you would stay with the gang, Arthur and John taught you how to shoot, and you went on hunts with Charles. After a while, Hosea also allowed you to take part in little heists, Arthur always by your side to make sure you were safe.

It started then that he began to see you in a different light. You were smart and cunning, using your innocence to lure people in. Men, in particular, are unable to withstand your shy smile, and Arthur found himself to be one of them.

It’s not that you used it against him, but whenever you asked something of him, there was no way for him to say no. Soon, Hosea found bigger jobs for the two of you, calling you a great team. You ended up on the road a lot, often just the two of you.

Arthur did his best to act respectively, but you seemed so comfortable around him that you sometimes didn’t care much about decency. He got to see more of your long legs and your cleavage than was good for him, and you had no trouble touching him or sleeping closeby when sharing a tent.

Slowly but surely, Arthur got more and more enticed by you, and it got so bad that he dreamt about you in ways that were anything but decent. Soon, those dreams and reality blurred together, and Arthur found himself staring at you at the worst of times, imagining all kinds of inappropriate things.

Today, Arthur would give anything to not be in camp. It’s your 20th birthday, and since it’s your first one since you’ve joined the gang, Dutch announced a little celebration. Arthur gave you his present, a new hunting knife, early in the morning, and ever since then, he tried to stay away from you.

Now, Arthur‘s sitting on a log farthest away from the fire, nursing a beer in his hand. The others are going to town with whiskey and rum, the alcohol taking its toll. Karen is sitting on Sean’s lap, the two of them the loudest but not the best at singing along to the songs Javier plays.

Once in a while, Uncle chimes in with the banjo, causing some laughs. Soon, most of the gang is drunk enough to dance around the fire. John and Abigail do a surprisingly decent job, not arguing for a change, while Lenny tortures your feet.

Arthur can tell that you’re soldiering on, but while Lenny is kind and wicked smart, he’s still not the most skilled when it comes to dancing. When Hosea gets up from his seat, Arthur hopes that he might release you, and he actually claps Lenny’s shoulder.

“My dear boy, I fear you need some more practice before we can let you dance with the ladies.“

Everybody laughs, and you give Lenny an apologetic smile, but he just shrugs, not taking offense. Arthur’s sure Hosea will take over now, showing Lenny how to do a better job, but instead, he turns around.

“This lady deserves a decent birthday dance,“ Hosea says. "Arthur? Would you be so kind?“

All eyes dart to Arthur, and he wishes the ground would open up and swallow him whole. He loves Hosea with all his heart, but sometimes he would like to smack him.

"Arthur can’t dance,“ Sean blurts out, saying out loud what everybody else must be thinking.

Dutch laughs at the heartfelt announcement. "No see, there’s a big difference between not being able to do something and deliberately denying the world your gift.“

Arthur shakes his head, ready to disappoint both Hosea and Dutch, but then Hosea points at you. "Come on, you can’t say no to a birthday dance with this lovely young lady.“

That’s exactly the problem. You’re young, way too young for Arthur, and he can’t say no to you, not ever. Looking into your curious face, Arthur puts down the bottle and gets to his feet. Hosea pats his shoulder, and Dutch applauds as if they already watched a great show.

"Now watch and learn, gentlemen,“ he cheers.

Arthur does his best to ignore everybody else, his eyes focused on you. A tingling feeling rushes through his body the second he takes your hand, and he leads you away from the fire to have more room. Besides, it will be easier to talk to you without the others hearing what he says.

"I’ll have to put my hand on your back,“ Arthur warns you, wishing he could say something that would turn you away, but you just smile at him.

"It’s alright, Arthur,“ you say, amusement in your voice, "I know how dancing works.“

Arthur swallows hard when he puts his hand in place on the small of your back. You rest your hand on his shoulder, and just like so many times before, you have no problem with being near him. Taking a step forward, you close the gap between Arthur and you, and he feels like dying when your body presses warm against his own.

Counting in a whisper, Arthur tries to give you an idea when to start, and then you’re off. Although Arthur hasn’t danced in years, it all comes back to him now. Just like shooting a gun, it’s something you do without thinking. Lead by Arthur, you have no trouble following along, and some of the gang members even whistle and cheer.

By the time the song is over, Arthur has a hard time letting you go. Still pressed against him, your chest rises and falls with the exhausted breaths you take, your face flushed, and your hair a little looser and out of place from being swirled around. You look as if you and Arthur did something way more indecent than dancing, the picture searing itself into Arthur’s brain.

To make the torture complete, you smile at him as if he just hung the moon, going on tiptoes to press a kiss on his cheek. "Thank you, Arthur.”

There’s clapping from around the campfire before Dutch and Hosea take turns telling stories about heists where their dancing skills were essential. When Arthur is sure that nobody focuses on him anymore, he takes the chance to sneak away, heading into the nearby woods.

On the first day at the new campsite, Arthur found a hidden arch in between two big trees that leads to a small meadow. He leans against a tree with closed eyes, filling his lungs with fresh evening air, trying his best not to think about the dance. Of course, he ends up thinking just about that, and especially about how you looked afterward.

“Arthur?"

Your voice draws Arthur out of his daydream. It’s not you in his imagination, but you’re really in front of him. "What?”

“I’m sorry,” you say in that timid voice you use when you think you did something wrong, “I didn’t mean to disturb you.”

“No, it’s alright.” Arthur pushes himself off of the tree. “Just didn’t think anybody knew of this place.”

“I found it a day after we made camp,” you say, twisting the fabric of your skirt with your fingers.

Arthur knows that it’s a habit of you that only shows when you’re nervous. He’s not used to seeing it when the two of you are alone.

“Is there something you need?” he asks, thinking that you might have some sort of problem.

“I wanted to ask you something,” you say, still fidgeting with your skirt. “I know you’ve already given me a great present, but there’s something else I wish for, and you’re the only one I want to ask for it.”

Arthur’s heart pounds faster. It’s as if you know that he won’t be able to say no, and since you’re asking him in the middle of the woods, it’s probably something more than just a request for more shooting lessons. Still, Arthur can’t help himself. It’s you, after all, so he has to ask. “What is it?”

“In Mary-Beth’s novels, people always have these great kisses, but all the boys I’ve met were just-” You don’t finish the sentence, but Arthur has been a 19-year-old boy himself. They often aren’t that great with romance and tenderness.

You take a step towards Arthur, making his heart almost leap out of his chest. “I’m 20 years old now,” you continue with a sigh, looking up at him. “All I want is one real kiss. With a real man. Like you.”

Arthur can tell how hard it is for you to say this, your voice getting quieter with every word while the blood rushing through his veins becomes so loud that he can hardly hear you. Still, you manage to hold his gaze when he’s looking for words.

“Those are just books, ya know?” Arthur says.

It’s the wrong thing to say. You shrink like fruit in the hot sun, all hope draining from your face to be replaced by sadness. Arthur hates to see you like this, especially when he’s the reason for it. But what else can he say? It’s not his place to give you any kisses. The way he thinks about you is already shameful enough.

“You’re right,” you finally say, your voice near tears. “It’s stupid. I shouldn’t have asked.”

You turn around, and Arthur’s heart stands still. He failed you. After promising to protect you, he hurt you more than anybody else. And why? Because of stupid rules. It’s not like you’re asking for something terrible. Just a kiss. Just a favor from a friend.

“Wait,” Arthur says, the word barely more than a whisper.

You turn back around, and Arthur takes your hand, tugging just enough to have you come back to him. You look up to him, waiting for an explanation, but he knows he doesn’t have the words for this. Instead, Arthur cups your face with his hand, pulling you closer.

He feels like he’s drowning in your eyes, unable to stop now, so he leans in to close the gap between you. Arthur can hear you taking a shaky breath, his own chest feeling like it’s about to burst. He’s never considered himself a great kisser, but he tries to be gentle with you, knowing all too well what novels you’ve been reading.

At first, your lips barely touch, Arthur still giving you a chance to stop. Instead, you lean into it. Arthur puts his hand onto the small of your back the same way he did during the dance, drawing you in before pressing another soft kiss to your lips. Your hands come to rest against his chest, sending waves of heat through his body.

Arthur knows that this should be it. You got your kiss after all, but something deep in his soul keeps him in place. It kept screaming and clawing at him for months, telling him how much he wanted to be with you. You mentioning other boys kissing you awakened a horrible ache in Arthur, raging like a fire that consumes him.

Despite telling himself over and over that he can’t be with you, Arthur longs to have so much more with you. The thought that someone could take you away is killing him, forcing him to hold on to you.

Arthur teases your lip with his tongue, and you eagerly open up for him, giving him a sweet taste of what could be. His hand runs down from your face along your neck, touching soft, warm skin before it ventures deeper. Arthur caresses your side, his fingers trailing along the curve of your breast and down to your hip.

With his other hand moving down to the swell of your ass, Arthur pulls you even closer, deepening the kiss. Your hot tongue brushes against his own, the sensation so overwhelming that everything around the two of you blurs.

Arthur gets lost in your kisses, the warmth of your body, your scent, and all the promises your body makes, pressed against him like a second skin. His fingers claw into the flesh on your hips as he rubs himself against you, lust tightening his pants.

You let out a soft moan, and from one second to the next, the world shifts back into focus. Searing pain shoots through Arthur’s body as if hit by lightning. This isn’t one of his fantasies where he’s allowed to be with you. It’s real, and it’s you. A girl who deserves so much better than him.

Arthur steps away from you in a hurry, his tone harsh as he barks at you. “Go back to camp!”

You take a step toward him, reaching out. “But Arthur-”

“Goddamn, girl! Go back to camp, right now!”

Arthur’s never thought that he’d be able to even raise his voice when talking to you, but now he shouts, making you freeze on the spot. You stare at him for a few seconds before you finally come to your senses. You turn around and rush through the trees, running from him like a startled deer.

With a growl, Arthur turns around, punching his fist against the nearest tree at full force. He’d hoped the pain would drive out the thoughts about you, but even with his knuckles bleeding, it’s not enough. Memories rush into his mind, of you looking at him, talking to him, touching him.

Arthur remembers the dance with every detail, and even worse, the kiss you just shared. Usually, it’s a gift to see something and be able to draw it right from his memory, but now it becomes a curse. He’ll never forget the taste of your lips, the way you held on to him, how your body melted against his. In dark, lonely nights, he’ll remember that enticing sound you made when he pushed himself against you.

You didn’t shy away from his touches, and Arthur realizes with horror that you might have let him do even more. You asked him for a kiss, but that’s rarely where the stories end. Maybe, you would have wanted more. Maybe, you would have allowed him to have you, right then and there, on the forest floor.

With a grunt, Arthur frees himself from his pants, stroking his cock so hard that it’s more painful than pleasurable. The thoughts consume him, the memories of you so vivid as if you were still there.

It doesn’t take Arthur long to reach his peak, his cock throbbing, hot spurs of come shooting against the bark of the tree in front of him. Tucking himself away, Arthur watches as it trickles down. Out of control as he is, he could have done such horrible things to you.

Consumed by shame, Arthur walks back through the trees, a plan forming in his mind. If he wants to protect you, he can’t be near you until he’s ingrained it in himself that he can never have you. Arthur has to go - far away.

——–

You have a hard time focusing on your work, looking up again and again to sneak a peek at Arthur across camp. If you keep going like that, the water will be ice cold until you’re done washing all the clothes, and Miss Grimshaw will have your head. Still, you can’t keep yourself from doing it, almost like you need to have your fill of Arthur before he disappears again.

With a sigh, you remember the time after your kiss. In the morning, Arthur was gone, only Hosea knowing where he went. He didn’t come back for four weeks, and when he did, he avoided you at all costs. You barely got to see Arthur at all for about three months after that. He either was in his tent or out of camp altogether.

Over the last month, Arthur stayed more often and didn’t leave the second you showed up. You at least got a “good morning” out of him every day, and once in a while, you had brief conversations about the weather or the latest successful jobs of the other gang members.

You feel like it still might take quite some time before things could go back to normal, if at all. You don’t blame Arthur, though. You risked your friendship over a stupid crush, using his kindness to trick him into getting what you wanted.

Of course, you should have known that Arthur didn’t feel the same way as you. To him, you must be nothing but a stupid little girl that needs constant supervision and help. You asked Arthur for a real kiss from a real man, ignoring that you didn’t even come close to being a real woman.

After all this time, you still can’t forget how Arthur kissed you, giving you all that you wanted while you had nothing to offer in return. All you could do now is to apologize and beg Arthur for forgiveness.

With another sigh, you go back to scrubbing the laundry. When you carry the basket with the wet clothes through camp to hang them up to dry, Hosea and Arthur walk past you. You give them a quick nod, keeping up appearances for Hosea’s sake. Arthur looks up, and it’s the first time that you get to hold eye contact with him for more than a second.

“Mylady,” he says, his voice soft.

The two men keep walking without pause, but you almost trip, your heart pounding. It’s been so long that Arthur had a kind word for you, but the familiar greeting brings you right back into the time before the kiss when everything was alright.

Your eyes fill with tears, and you do your best to quickly blink them away, but when you begin to hang up the clothes, Mary-Beth walks over to you.

“Are you alright?” she asks, leaning over to get a better look at your face.

“Sure,” you answer, focusing on the laundry.

From the corner of your eye, you can see Mary-Beth looking over to Arthur. “I didn’t mean to say anything. After all, it’s your business if you get along with Arthur, but this? If he makes you cry in the middle of camp, I’ll have a word with him. I mean it.”

You’ve never seen Mary-Beth talking so fiercely, and usually, she adores Arthur. That she would pick a fight with him over you makes your heart melt.

“It’s not him, it’s me,” you explain. “I did something foolish, and Arthur is right to be angry at me. I appreciate that you’re trying to help, but please don’t say anything to him.”

“But the crying,” Mary-Beth insists.

“Happy tears,” you say, giving her a big smile. “I think it’s going to be alright again.”

Mary-Beth looks back and forth between you and Arthur before pulling out a handkerchief and giving it to you. “Fine. But if there’s anything you need, please tell me.”

“I will. Thank you, Mary-Beth. You’re the best.”

She blushes a little and finally walks away, giving you another chance to look over to Arthur. You almost get caught when he and Hosea come your way.

“Can we have a word?” Hosea asks you with a smile, and you almost drop the shirt you’re holding.

You can’t believe that Arthur would tell Hosea about the kiss, but you can’t think of anything else they would want to talk about. “Sure,” you say, your fingers playing with the wet fabric in your hand while your heart pounds so hard that you wonder if they can hear it.

“I’ve got some information about a rich couple that moved from the city into a cabin up north. Really secluded, good spot if you know how to live off the land,” Hosea explains, giving you a chance to breathe again. It’s about a job. Nothing more.

“And they know how to do that?” you ask.

Hosea smiles. “Not from what I hear. I want Arthur and you to go up there and check it out. You might be able to charm them, offer your help. Maybe you can find out if they still got more riches left in the city.”

“Or we could just rob them,” Arthur says, his voice barely audible, but Hosea nudges his elbow into Arthur’s side.

“Don’t act like the brute, Arthur. We both know you’re much more than that.”

You know that to be true, but Arthur just grunts as if he doubts Hosea’s words. You wish you could tell him otherwise, but you don’t even dare to look at him.

Hosea takes a piece of paper out of his jacket and hands it to Arthur. “That’s the place.”

Arthur studies what looks like a hand-drawn map while rubbing his beard. “I say we head out right now. If we make camp when it gets dark, we should be able to reach the cabin tomorrow by noon.”

You wait for Hosea to answer, but when he stays silent, you look up to find the two men looking at you, and you realize Arthur’s talking to you, not Hosea.

“Oh, sure,” you hurry to say, “just let me finish up here, and I’ll get my things.”

“Great,” Hosea says, “glad to have the two of you on this. I was worried I’d have to send Bill.”

He winks at you and walks away, leaving you alone with Arthur. You rack your brain what to say, but Arthur beats you to it. “I was kinda planning on wearing that again.”

You stare at him, drowning in his eyes until he nods to your hands. You’ve been wringing the shirt between your fingers, only now seeing that it’s one of Arthur’s. “Oh, of course. I just-"

You turn around on the spot, hastily going back to work. "I’ll meet you at the horses,” Arthur says behind you. His voice is warm, flowing down your back like a sweet caress. It tightens your chest how much you missed him talking to you.

“I’ll be just a minute,” you manage to say, only able to catch your breath once you hear Arthur walking away.

After finishing the laundry, you pack what you’ll need for the trip and say goodbye to the other girls. Mary-Beth gives you a wary look when she hears that you’re riding out with Arthur, but you give her a big smile to reassure her that you’re alright.

Not that you are. On the one hand, you’re looking forward to working with Arthur again, and the trip might finally give you a chance to apologize, but on the other hand, you’re nervous as hell. It’s been so long since you’ve been alone with Arthur, and he might still be angry with you.

With your heart almost beating out of your chest, you walk over to Arthur. He already saddled up your horse, checking if everything is in place on his own mare.

“Hey,” you say, trying to make him aware of you.

“You ready?” he asks, not looking up from what he’s doing.

“Yes, I am,” you say, and when he stays silent, you feel the need to keep him engaged. “Where are we even going?”

Finally, Arthur looks at you before handing you the map Hosea gave him. When you reach for the paper, your fingers brush over Arthur’s skin. It’s warm and so weirdly familiar that this brief touch tightens your chest again while Arthur gets back to his work.

You stare at the map, trying hard to level your breathing without Arthur noticing. Finally, Arthur pulls himself up on his horse. “Ready to go?” he asks, and you quickly climb onto your mare.

As you head out on the narrow path, you hold the map out to Arthur. He takes it back, his fingertips trailing over your skin this time. Arthur doesn’t react at all, but your body fills with heat, brought on by the memories that have been haunting you for months.

Your horse keeps pace with Arthur’s while your mind drifts off, remembering how everything started. At first, you were just thankful for Arthur saving you. Even in your short life, you had to learn that there were evil people in the world, especially men when faced with a young girl. Arthur was nothing like that.

Despite his own claims to the contrary, you can’t bring yourself to think of him as bad. He might be robbing people, but he doesn’t lay a finger on them. Just like he always respected you. At first, you thought of him as a good friend, a little bitter or sarcastic at times, but also funny, kind, and awfully sweet if he wanted to be.

Your feelings for him changed one day when Arthur helped you down from one of the wagons when the gang was moving camp. He waved at you with outstretched arms before lifting you down. You held on to his broad shoulders while his large hands closed warm around your waist. He set you down on the ground and smiled, having your heart pounding like crazy.

Maybe you’ve read too many of Mary-Beth’s books, hoping for so much more than there was, but everything changed after this moment. You found yourself staring at Arthur at all times, and somehow he turned from a friend to a man. You were always aware of his body and his voice, your body reacting to him in ways that often took your breath away.

After a while, you found yourself wanting more, and when Hosea sent you on all these jobs together, you even tried to seduce Arthur. Not that you had much experience on how to do that, but usually, a little naked skin and closeness does the trick for most men. Arthur didn’t react at all, not even when sleeping with you in the same tent, making you want him even more.

And then there was your birthday. The dance put a final nail into your coffin. There was something about the way Arthur held you, how he effortlessly made you follow him, and twirled you around. You wanted for him to do more, to take you like those confident men who swept the women off their feet in the books.

Arthur disappearing into the trees was a siren’s call to you, and when he walked to that secluded meadow, it seemed like fate. This could have been your fairytale, so you put up all your courage, offering yourself to him. You imagined it many times, but then Arthur kissed you in a way that was beyond your wildest dreams. You asked for a real kiss but never thought that it could be that good.

Despite Arthur’s anger, you still can’t fully regret what you did. Now that Arthur showed you how he feels, you have to make your peace knowing that you’ll never be with him. But no matter if you die alone or find another man, you’ll at least have the memory of one perfect kiss.

“Are you hearing me?”

Arthur’s voice only slowly reaches your ears, stopping you from wallowing in your memories. “What?”

“Let’s head for the saloon over there. They might have rooms.”

You stare in the direction of his outstretched hand, your mind racing. You planned to apologize to Arthur once you made camp, in the silence of the night. You won’t have a chance for that in a noisy saloon.

“But it’s still early,” you say. “We can make a few more miles until dusk.”

Arthur’s already steering his horse off the road. “We don’t have to. We already made more than half of the way. You’re better off with a real meal and a bed to sleep in.”

You bite your lip, hating that Arthur messes up your plan by looking out for you. It’s infuriating and sweet at the same time, the embodiment of Arthur.

After hitching your horses outside, you venture into the saloon. For such a secluded place, it has quite the amount of customers, even more so considering the early hour. You walk to the bar with Arthur, where he orders two whiskeys, but before you’re able to drink, he suddenly taps your shoulder. “Excuse me for a second. I know these men over there.”

He walks over to a table where a bunch of rowdy fellers play poker, leaving you with a burning sensation where he touched you. You make up for it by downing one of the two glasses in one go, contemplating to drink the other, too.

“Now, who would let a sweet girl like you drink alone?”

The high pitched voice behind you sends a shiver down your spine. You’ve had men talk to you like this many times, but it hasn’t happened since you’ve joined the gang. When you were out, you always had someone like Arthur or Charles with you who kept idiots at bay without even trying.

“I’m not alone,” you say, trying to spot Arthur, but you’re suddenly surrounded by four men.

The one who spoke to you before comes closer, putting an arm up on the bar to box you in. “I don’t see nobody.”

“My husband will be back any second,” you say, hating how weak your voice sounds.

The man gives you a wide grin, presenting his half-rotten teeth. “He’s not here now, missy. Only you and us.”

He trails his fingers over your hand, and you react without thinking. Using the element of surprise, you duck below his arm, sidestepping another guy before he can grab you. Basically flying through the room, you reach Arthur, immediately clinging to his arm.

Both Arthur and the men at the table are staring at you in surprise, but nothing in this world could make you let go off Arthur now. “I missed you at the bar,” you say, trying to sound casual, but your voice is shaking a little.

Arthur takes a look at them, and his eyes narrow, a wild look appearing in them while you can see the muscles of his jaw clenching. He reaches into his pocket before turning back to the men at the table. “Anyway, I just wanted to pay back what I owe,” he says, handing a few dollars to one of the men, “no hard feelings, right?”

The man counts the money, a smile coming onto his face. “Of course, no hard feelings,” he says, sharing the money with the other men.

“Have a good day, gentlemen,” Arthur says, tipping his head.

As Arthur turns, he pries your hand away from his arm, prompting you to protest, but then he puts his arm around you, his hand resting on your hip as you walk back to the bar. Arthur orders more drinks and keeps standing so close that you can feel his body against yours.

“So that’s your husband, missy?” the man with the high voice asks from the other end of the bar, letting your blood run cold. You forgot to mention that little detail to Arthur.

“Excuse me?” Arthur asks, an edge to his voice that you know. It never ends well for the person he’s talking to.

The man sneers at him. “I’m talking to her.”

“You don’t talk to my wife,” Arthur says, the words making you shiver. Then he steps in front of you, shielding you from view with his whole body.

The two men stare at each other in silence, and you know that something terrible is about to happen. The man moves his arm, there’s a loud bang, and then he falls backward, blood trickling down his forehead. All eyes are on him as he collides with the floor, his gun slipping out of his hand.

Deep down, you seem to relive every lesson about shooting a gun that Arthur and John have given you. You step around Arthur, pulling his second gun out of its holster and pointing it right at the man’s face nearest to you. He stares down the barrel with wide eyes while Arthur trains his gun on one of the others. You know you’re outnumbered, but you won’t go down without a fight, and everybody in the saloon just saw that Arthur might be quicker than them.

The men look back and forth between you and Arthur, contemplating if they can take you. Before it can come to that, the poker players get to their feet, taking position behind you and Arthur. The man who took Arthur’s money rests his hand on his gun.

“The way I see it, your friend here was outta line. That’s really no way to talk to a married woman.” He looks around, and the other men in the saloon give small nods to agree with him. “I suggest you take him out of here and be on your way. We wanna play in peace, you understand?”

The men don’t move until Arthur slowly lowers his gun. You follow his lead, and the man in front of you steps back. They put their guns away to pick up the body and quickly make their way outside.

“Thank you,” Arthur says to the poker players, and the man who spoke just shrugs.

“Never liked those fellers anyway. You fancy a game?”

“No, we’ll better be on our way.”

“Suit yourself.”

The men go back to their game while Arthur puts his hand on your back, leading you outside. He unties the horses, constantly looking around.

“Why are we going?” you say, your heart still pounding from what just happened. “Wouldn’t we be safer with these guys?”

“These guys are only friendly for a prize,” Arthur says. “And the men who left was O'Driscolls. I bet they’ll be back in numbers. We don’t want to be here when that happens.”

Arthur gets on his horse and holds out his hand to you. “Come on.”

“I have my own horse.”

“I won’t let you ride alone when those guys might come up behind us.”

Arthur just shot a guy because he didn’t like the way he talked to you. It’s probably useless to argue with him now. You take his hand, and he lifts you up with ease. “Hold on,” he says, and you happily reach around his waist, pressing yourself against his back.

Arthur spurs on his horse, quickly bringing it into a gallop, barely giving you time to whistle for your own horse to follow. You ride hard until the sun begins to go down. Arthur checks both sides of the road to find a good spot for camp, and you end up on a hilltop. A few large boulders shield you from view while the higher ground lets you see for miles in any direction. There’s no chance that anybody could sneak up on you here.

You get a fire going, and Arthur sets up a tent while you try to make a decent meal out of the provisions you brought along. When Arthur is done, he sits down on his bedroll, and you hand him a steaming bowl.

“It’s not the decent meal you were talking about earlier,” you say, feeling guilty that Arthur’s plans got all messed up because of you.

“I’m sure it’s fine,” Arthur says, bringing the bowl closer to smell its content. “I remember the great meals you used to make on our last jobs.”

You almost joke about that being a wife’s job, but while Arthur backed up your lie in the saloon, he might not find it funny. Instead, you eat your food in silence. When Arthur’s finished, he takes out his journal and writes, leaving you to stare into the fire. Everything is so nice and peaceful, you’re not quite sure if you should apologize to Arthur at all. What if that only rips open old wounds?

Sneaking a look at Arthur, you can see the difference in how he moves his pencil. He’s no longer writing but draws something. You tell yourself that it’s none of your business, but you’ve always loved Arthur’s art, and you are one of the few people he sometimes shows it to. Hoping that this might be something you can talk about, you crawl over to Arthur.

“What are you drawing?”

Arthur puts the pages together for a moment, looking like he’s embarrassed, but then he opens the journal and hands it to you. The drawing shows a campfire with a woman sitting in front of it, staring into the flames. You.

“You’re so good at this,” you say, your eyes fixed on the page.

“Good at something useless,” Arthur grunts.

You have to disagree. It’s still a mystery to you how someone can capture life and emotions with a pencil and paper. The woman in the drawing looks lost, though. You won’t be able to just forget what happened, you have to talk to Arthur.

Putting down the journal, you take a deep breath. “Arthur, I’m sorry.”

He studies your face for a long moment, deep in thought. “Sorry for what?”

“The kiss,” you blurt out before you lose your courage. “You’ve always been such a good friend, and I took advantage of that. I asked you because I knew that you wouldn’t say no. I shouldn’t have done that.”

“I shouldn’t have yelled at you,” Arthur says, and you feel like hitting him for taking any of the blame.

“You were right to be angry. I should have known that you’d never feel the same way about me.”

Arthur takes a deep breath as if it’s hard for him to say the following words. “If you was a little older, or I was a bit younger-”

Arthur trails off, but your heart is already pounding. You thought that Arthur doesn’t feel anything for you, but here he is, drawing your picture and worrying about your age, not angry about the kiss at all.

“I thought you didn’t like me, Arthur.”

“Jesus, girl,” Arthur huffs, almost amused, “of course I like you. You’re right out perfect. It just doesn’t matter what I feel. It’s just not right.”

“It matters to me,” you say, your voice breathless as hope blooms in your heart, “I don’t care about the age difference.”

Arthur’s lost for words for a moment, but then he shrugs. “It’s not just that. You deserve way better than me.”

Usually, you’re not one to get your way. You accept what others tell you and move on, putting their wishes above yours. This can’t be one of those times. It’s too important, and you couldn’t live with yourself if you didn’t try everything to be happy.

“I might be young, but I’m not naive or stupid. I know that you’re not perfect, but neither are the ranchers who hurt their cattle or the merchants who draw up the prices when the poor can barely pay them,” you say, talking yourself into a frenzy. “Unlike those fancy dressed crooks in the big city, you are so much more.”

Arthur lifts his hand as if to interrupt you, but for once, you don’t let him, continuing your tirade. “I fell in love with you because you’re kind, funny, and caring. You’re not lining your own pockets, but do whatever you have to to help your family and even strangers. You don’t take pleasure from cruelty, but manage to ease other people’s misery and pain. You’re a good person, Arthur. I really don’t see how I could possibly do better.”

Staring at you out of big eyes, Arthur opens his mouth, but nothing comes out until he clears his throat, his voice still hoarse when he speaks. “In love?”

It’s unnerving that this is the one thing Arthur took from this, but you said it, and there’s no point in denying it. “Yes, I love you, Arthur,“ you say, shrugging your shoulders. "I’m old enough to know that I want to be with you. Not a better or younger version of you, but you just the way you are.“

Arthur drops his head, his eyes fixed on the flames in front of him. You would give anything to know what he’s thinking, but you won’t ask. You said everything you wanted to say, and if that’s not enough for Arthur, then there’s nothing you can do.

When Arthur looks back up at you, there’s an expression on his face you’ve never seen before. You can’t tell if it’s good or bad, your heart racing in your chest. All you know is that whatever Arthur’s about to say next will decide your future together.

——–

Everything you said to Arthur is swirling around in his head, making him dizzy. For months, he tried to get over you, and Arthur only agreed to let you come along because he was sure he finally got his feelings under control. He should have known better.

What happened in the saloon showed Arthur how afraid he was to lose you, and calling you his wife, even as a ruse, made him happier than anything in a long time. After what you just told Arthur, the two of you can’t go back to things how they were before, and he has to admit that you’re right. You’re able to make your own decisions, and if you decided – for whatever reason – that you wanted to be with him, then who is he to take that away from you?

Arthur‘s heart sings at the mere thought of giving in. No matter his feelings of right and wrong, nobody can blame him for losing this battle, not if you’re sitting there, begging him with all that you have to allow the two of you to be happy.

When Arthur looks into your eyes, the longing in his heart grows so unbearable that he can’t take it anymore. He opens his arms, inviting you in. "Come here.“

You fly into Arthur’s arms without a second of hesitation, proving once more that he’s doing the right thing. Arthur pulls you into his lap, and you put your arms around his neck, making him look up into your beautiful face.

"I tried for so long,“ he says, defeat in his voice. "I can’t get you out of my head.“

Arthur trails his fingers along your cheek as you smile at him. "You’re not supposed to.“

He draws you in, and you follow, letting him kiss you. Arthur thought there could be nothing better than your first kiss, but nothing compares to this one. This time, there’s nothing bad or shameful about it.

You melt against Arthur’s body, your hands running through his hair while he holds you close, not wanting to let go ever again. Arthur wouldn’t mind staying like this forever, but you roll your hips, grinding against him.

"Arthur, I want you,” you say, looking at him in a way that makes his heart miss a beat, but then you cast your eyes down as if ashamed. “If you want me, too.”

Every impure thought that Arthur had about you rushes through his mind, and he has a hard time not to throw you down to the ground and have his way with you. After all, you deserve much better than that. He’ll respect your wishes, but he still feels like it’s his responsibility to protect you.

“Of course I want you,” he says, his words getting you to look at him again, “but we have time. There’s no need to rush anything.”

“Rush?” I’ve been thinking about this for a long time.“ You let out a little laugh before running your hand over your face as if you want to hide. "I even tried seducing you when we were alone, but you never seemed to care.”

Arthur can’t help that his mouth falls open, thinking about all those times he had to hold himself back. “You did that on purpose?”

“What do you think? I don’t just undress in front of everybody,” you say, playing with the buttons on Arthur’s shirt.

“You gave me such a hard time with that,” Arthur says with a sigh. “This is already bad enough.”

He’s holding you by the hips, feeling how you begin to move on top of him. “Then maybe I should try one more time,” you whisper.

You reach down to unbutton your dress, pushing down your chemise. This time, Arthur looks without reservation before leaning in and kissing the exposed skin. You bury your fingers in his hair, still rolling your hips, and Arthur has to admit to himself that you might not be as innocent as you seem. It makes no sense to treat you like a delicate flower when you’re actually the storm.

Arthur reaches down to hike up your skirt, his fingers trailing along the soft skin of your thighs. You hold still but reach down to help him, pulling your dress up right over your head. It takes a little fumbling, but it’s worth it. Having you sit on top of him in your thin chemise brings heat to Arthur’s whole body, and he can’t help that he’s getting painfully hard in his pants.

There’s a knowing grin on your face, almost as if you’re mocking him, and Arthur can’t take it anymore. He lifts you up and leans forward, carefully putting you down on his bedroll. Without hesitation, Arthur pulls up the skirt, and you wiggle under him, letting him undress you fully.

Arthur can’t remember having seen anything so beautiful in his entire life. In the dim light of the fire, your skin has a lovely glow, your body a perfect combination of straight lines and inviting curves. If he wasn’t so desperate to touch you, Arthur would have loved to draw you like this.

With his fingers, Arthur follows a line from your cheek along your neck, tracing your collarbone and climbing up the swell of your breast. Your nipple hardens under his touch, and Arthur can’t help but lean in and suck it into his mouth. You let out a surprised gasp, soon followed by barely audible moans when Arthur keeps teasing your breasts with both lips and hands.

You reach for him, eagerly pushing down his suspenders, and Arthur comes up for a moment to let you get him out of his shirt. Your eyes roam over his naked chest while your hands massage his muscles, coming to rest on his shoulders. You draw Arthur in, letting him kiss your breasts and stomach while your fingers dig into the skin on his back.

Arthur moves even lower, his hands closing around your thighs. You eagerly open your legs for him, giving him a first look at the sweet locks that cover your mount and lips. Arthur traces his fingers in a swirling line through them before touching your soft center. You gasp again when Arthur pushes between your folds, enticing wetness greeting him.

He wouldn’t mind teasing you some more, but you reach for him, beckoning him to come back to you. “Arthur, please.”

Arthur follows your plea, crawling over your body, his arms propped up next to your face. You pull him in for a kiss, your tongue licking into his mouth as if you might die without his taste. You keep him close like this while your hands wander down his chest and to his pants. You pry them open, getting hot waves to roll all over Arthur’s body.

The anticipation is unbearable, and Arthur moans against your lips when you finally close your fingers around his cock to get him out of his pants. Free from the enclosure, you reward him with slow strokes along his whole lengths, making Arthur bite his lip.

You soothe him with soft kisses, but you’re just as desperate, your hips moving under him. “Take me, Arthur, please.”

Arthur wishes he could show more restraint, but he’s dreamed about this way too often in too many ways to hold back now. He runs the tip of his cock through your folds, using your wetness to get himself slick as well, and when your fingers dig into his shoulders, Arthur pushes in.

You’re so hot and tight, he hopes he can keep this up and goes as slowly as he can. You still gasp in surprise, and more sighs and moans break out of you when Arthur conquers you inch by inch. Once he’s fully sheeted inside of you, Arthur holds still, enjoying the feeling of being close.

“You okay?” he whispers against your lips, and you take a deep breath before being able to reply.

“God, yes,” you sigh, rolling your hips again.

Arthur dares to move with you. You kiss, again and again, hands roaming over heated skin, while Arthur pushes into you at a steady pace. Your hands wander around Arthur’s neck, and soon you seem to hold on for dear life. With your breathing speeding up, Arthur knows you won’t make it much longer, and the harder he thrusts into you, the more desperate become your moans.

Leaning in to kiss and bite your neck, Arthur finally throws you over the edge. Your thighs shake as you come, your muscles clenching around Arthur’s cock. You cling to him, whispering profanities he never thought you capable of knowing, and it becomes harder and harder for him to hold back.

Still, Arthur tries not to overwhelm you, but you keep moving, spurring him on. “Please, Arthur. I want you, I want all of you.”

With your beautiful, young body moving under him in ecstasy, Arthur can’t hold back his lust. His fingers dig hard into your flesh as he buries himself deep in your hot core, filling you up with his come.

You’re both drenched in sweat and breathing heavily. Arthur wishes he could ask if you’re alright, but he doesn’t have enough air. Instead, you share a few soft kisses. Despite that first wave of satisfaction, Arthur can’t stop touching you. His fingers trace over your smooth skin, leaving goosebumps in their wake.

Arthur’s been thinking about being with you for so long, he feels as if he’s in a dream. He kisses his way down your body, and when his hands massage your thighs, you open his legs for him. Arthur trails his fingers over your soft lips, making you roll your hips.

Teased like this, Arthur can see how your muscles work, and his come is swelling out of you, trickling down. The sight steers something inside of Arthur. It’s as if he marked you, finally making you his.

He can’t help but touch you, and the urge to taste you as well overcomes him. Arthur leans in, running his tongue over your clit, and you let out a surprised moan. With his hands on your thighs, Arthur keeps teasing you with his tongue.

He doesn’t mind his own taste that’s soon replaced with yours, your moans and soft cries growing more urgent. The way you move under Arthur steers up his own arousal. Caught between your legs like this, he can’t hold in his own moans.

You bury your fingers in Arthur’s hair, lifting your hips and urging him on with pleas for more. He happily indulges you, teasing you with his fingers as well as his mouth until you let out a frustrated groan.

Arthur stops and looks up to you, and before he can ask if you’re alright, you already push him back by the shoulders. The second he’s on his back, you crawl on top of him, rubbing yourself against his hardening cock.

You lean in and kiss Arthur, taking heavy breaths in between. All he can do is hold on to your hips as you lift yourself up to push him inside of you again. Trapped in your tight heat, Arthur lets his head fall back.

He might have marked you today, but at this moment, Arthur knows that you did so long ago. Arthur’s been yours from the start, and that won’t ever change, not as long as you’ll have him.

———

You dreamed about being with Arthur many times, but none of it compares to the real thing. His every touch sets you on fire, waking a lust inside of you that you’ve never known before. Longing to be close, you keep kissing Arthur, your body pressed against his as you move your hips to feel him deep inside of you.

All of it still seems like a dream, and you have the urge to make the most of it, feeling and tasting Arthur, desperate to make as many memories of this moment as you can.

Your eager cries fill the night, mixed in with Arthur’s moans, the both of you too desperate to hold back. You claw and bite, leaving marks on each other’s skin. The thought of the other gang members seeing them turns you on more than you ever thought possible.

Now that Arthur finally agreed to be with you, you want everybody else to know. You kiss along Arthur’s neck and suck the skin between your teeth, biting down enough to make Arthur growl. His fingers dig hard into your hips, and he holds you in place while he thrusts into you.

Arthur’s cock hits you deeply as he slides in and out of you with lewd sounds, and from one second to the other, everything becomes too much. You bury your face against Arthur’s neck as you fall over the edge, waves of pleasure rolling all over your body.

You cling to Arthur, and he holds you tight, his hips bucking as you shake on top of him. He moans against your ear, filling you up with his come as your clenching muscles tighten around him.

For a while, you just stay like this, enjoying the warmth of Arthur’s body against your own. His fingertips trail softly over the skin on your back, and when your eyes threaten to fall shut, Arthur gets you to move.

After helping you into your chemise, Arthur carries you into the tent, and the second he lies down, you cuddle up to him. Arthur kisses your forehead and puts his arms around you as if he never wants to let go again.

You just lie there for a while until Arthur lets out a long sigh. “I fell in love with you, too, you know. Pretty much from the start.”

Warmth spreads in your chest, and you bury your face in the crook of Arthur’s neck. “I love you, too, Arthur.”

“Do me a favor then?” Arthur says, the words turning into a question.

“Anything.”

“Next time, just tell me right away what’s good for us. I’m an idiot most of the time.”

You laugh, but run your hand over Arthur’s chest as if to wash the thought away. “You’re my idiot now, so don’t worry, I’ll tell you.”

“Thank you, darling,” Arthur says, squeezing you slightly.

You close your eyes, feeling safer and more comfortable than ever before in your life. Everything bad in your past just drifts away, making room for happiness and a future you only ever dared to dream about.

“You were right,” you say. “It’s just books. This was so much better.”

Arthur chuckles, and you fall asleep to the sound of it, the first time of many over the years to come.

#arthur morgan x female reader #arthur morgan x reader #rdr2 smut #rdr2 fanfic #my writing #fulfilled request #emily-strange #Anonymous

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wearenot7withu · 5 years ago

Text

pairing : jungkook x reader

genre : fluff,bestfriends!au, friendstolovers!au

warning : maybe some swearing, a little bit of jealousy

word count : 2,420 words

summary : Do you know what’s better than summer? Having a summer job as a lifeguard. You are by the water, the sun is making you look tan and of course, your lifeguard partner isn’t a bad thing to see either. Luckily - or well not so much, you’re not the only one thinking that. Will the bad green monster come out or can you be on your best behavior?

masterlist

a/n : so here’s my jungkook as a lifeguard scenario. i hope you like it, your feedbacks are welcome. i really enjoyed writing this, tho i’m more of an angst type of girl so this was challenging for me. nevertheless i’m kinda happy with the outcome hope you are too ♥ also thank you for your feedbacks for the business trip

July is the month of water. The perfect time to go to the beach, take a vacation at some seaside city, or if you don't have a seashore near you, you can enjoy the swimming pools at the local thermal spa.

Since you were a child, you loved swimming. You were waiting all year round for summer so you can finally swim. So when you were nine years old, your parents signed you up for the local swim team, and in high school, you became part of the school's girl's swim club too. When your first working summer came, your choice was obvious. You applied to be a lifeguard, and ever since you were sixteen years old, you have come back every summer.

Your first two years went by uneventfully. The first year you got to know the other workers, so during the second year, you were already familiar with everyone. The third-year was a little bit interesting. Jeon Jungkook, the school's number one swimmer, captain of the boy's swim team, the boyfriend of the school's cheer captain joined your little lifeguard group. You two went to the same high school, enjoyed the same sport, but you’ve never really talked with each other. He was the top of the school's social ladder, and even though you were a swim captain too, you liked to be in the background. But that summer - which was already three years ago, oh God time flies by so fast - you two became friends. Best friends actually. You can imagine everyone's face when on the first day back in school he asked you to sit next to him and his friends at lunch.

Before Jungkook, you had a few friends, was in a good relationship with everyone, and didn't despise anyone. But as said, that was before Jungkook. The first person you lowkey hated was Jiha, his girlfriend. She was a bitch to Jungkook, and even though he knew how to handle her behavior, you still didn't like her. Thankfully they broke up. Jungkook dumped her before the winter formal and asked you to go with him - but strictly only as friends. Although life had another plan because by the time spring formal came, you were together.

Like it was said before, it's been three years since that. It's again a summer working as a lifeguard with your boyfriend, which is getting harder and harder every year. Have you seen his body? Besides having a masterpiece face, his body is just the cherry on the top, and sadly you're not the only one enjoying the view.

"You know, you're a lifeguard, right?"

A voice pulled you back into reality. You turned your head towards the source of the sound with a confused look on your face.

"Jungkook, we've been doing this for summers... I think pretty much the whole town knows that" you said matter-of-factly.

"But you can't save lives if you're daydreaming"

"I wasn't daydreaming" you defended yourself.

"Admit it, you were daydreaming about me"

"Keep on dreaming, pretty boy"

"You think I'm pretty?"

"Well, I'm not with you because of your brain" you smiled at him.

"Careful y/n or I might throw you into the water" You put your hands up in front of your chest, showing that you're stepping down from this fight.

"I'm gonna go check the kids' pool" He leaned towards you to give you a kiss.

"Bring me a bottle of water on your way back please"

As he was walking away you looked around. You saw a few ladies' heads following your boyfriend, but you can't really blame them. As long as they're only looking, you're kind of alright with that. As you were waiting for your partner to come back, two girls started jumping into the pool. You blew your whistle, which made everyone look at you. You signaled an X with your arms to the girls, who only rolled their eyes. You hate these I'm the center of the world type of girls. They think the rules aren't for them.

As Jungkook was walking back, he blew his whistle too. The girls were now giggling. He gave you the bottle of water and sat beside you.

"You know I was thinking" you hummed so he can continue. "I don't want us to come back next year" he shrugged.

"What? Why?" you looked at him with a surprised expression.

"Boys are looking at your tits, checking out your ass, and like yeah, I know they're good and everything but you're still my girl" he gestured around us as if you're not dealing with this same issue.

"Kook, those girls were just now giggling at your attention and are keep on jumping into the pool just so you can acknowledge them again" And because it was true, you blew the whistle. Again.

"And you're fine with it?" You shrugged.

"I'm not fine with their presence, but only because they're annoying. Those who only look at you are can't be blamed" you stood up and sat in his lap "You know, that's what you get for having this gorgeous badass lifeguard girl as your girlfriend" you kissed his cheek both side, then gave a little peck on his lips. "And that's" you pointed towards the jumping girls "what I get for having one of the towns most chased man as my boyfriend"

He gave you a kiss, and another one, and another one. "They're still jumping" you sighed at that.

"Come with me?" With him, you arrived next to the girls. "I kindly ask you to continue your jumping at the swimmer's pool, this pool isn't for hopping"

"Oh, really?" the two girls looked at each other, then the taller one with light brown hair and tanned skin took a step towards Jungkook. "Can you show me where is that? I think I don't know" Calm down y/n.

"It's two pools away" you answered.

She took another step and now started to play with her hair. "I still don't know"

Jungkook stepped aside, lifted his arm and pointed towards the swimmer's pool "Right there, in front of you" The girl seemed to understand he's not interested. You smiled at her, with a smile which said HA! Told you to go away!

The day went by after that calmly. A few kids crying, one person bumped into another underwater but nothing major happened. When your shift ended, you two went to take a shower - separately, of course, then Jungkook took you home to your parents' house. "You coming in?" you asked him.

"I promised my brother I will go with him looking for an engagement ring"

You squealed a little "Is he planning to propose Mayah?" He nodded.

You bid him goodbye with a kiss and went inside. You've been living together off-campus during school since starting college, but for the summers, you always go back home to your roots.

The next day you woke up a little later than you should've, which meant total chaos for the morning. On top of that, you didn't have time to eat, because when Jungkook pulled up in front of the house, you were still in your sleeping clothes.

"Your hair looks like you've been fucked through the whole night" greeted your dearest boyfriend. You rolled your eyes at that

"Yeah my other boyfriend visited" you said sarcastically. "Where are you signed today?"

After figuring out you weren't on the same pool duty, you didn't talk that much, not that you were in the car for a long time. "See you at clock-out" He gave you a kiss on your cheek and we said bye.

Today you'd been paired up with Josie, she was your partner for the first time when you started back in the days. "Are you ready for the old people?"

Her question made you snicker. "I would rather be at the kids' pool for a week"

You replied with a sigh, and Josie erupted in a laugh. It's true, little kids might be louder and more energetic, but old people are on a whole new level. They usually want to play matchmakers for their grandchildren.

"So how you and prince charming have been?" you laughed at the name Josie gave to Jungkook.

"I still don't get why you're calling him that, but we're good" you nod your head with a fond smile on your face "better than ever actually"

"That's good to hear"

Your stomach made some strange noise, signaling it's time for food. You told Josie you're gonna go grab something to eat from one of the food stalls. As you were waiting for your kung pao, you felt someone's presence very close to you. When you turned around, arms were caging you and the familiar smell hit your nose.

"Thanks for the baguette babe, but how can you not know I don't like pickles?" What? What baguette?

"Mmmm what are you talking about Kook?" you grabbed your meal before turning towards him and motioning towards the benches.

"Your memory is not that good anymore, you're getting old" He joked, and you kicked his leg under the table which made him chuckle with a boyish laugh.

"I slept through my alarm Jungkook, I didn't have the time to eat or buy a meal until now" you sighed, somebody must've been trying to get his attention with this. You have to say this is a new boldness, like this has never happened before.

"I have a secret admirer!" you clapped your hands yaaay because my mouth was full.

After finishing your breakfast slash lunch, you went back to Josie. You asked her about her new job and talked about college. She told you some funny stories which have happened to her there and you laughed a lot. From time to time some elders came up to you, showing pictures or pointing towards their grandsons. Sadly for them, both Josie and you are taken so you had to decline their propositions. You would be surprised how disappointed they can be once they find out they plan won't work out. OR how persistent they can be, they can't take no for an answer. That's the two end, no between. When that happens, you feel better with either Jungkook or one of the male colleagues. They're pretty much all Jungkook's friend, which means yours are too.

Clock-out quickly came, and you were cleaning the pools where you were assigned through the day for the other shift’s workers. To get to the locker rooms, you have to go beside the pool where you're boyfriend is on duty for the day. You thought you two will go to the changing rooms together, but as you get there you only see Taehyung cleaning.

"Did Jungkook leave you in the dirt alone?" You beamed at him. He turned his head towards you with a smile but quickly replaced it with a confused expression.

"Why aren't you at the bar?" he asked,

"Why would I be at the bar?" You asked back.

"You left a note to Jungkook to meet you at the bar at 3" You pointed at yourself asking him that you left a note.

"I didn't leave any note, is the note here though?" Taehyung pointed towards the trashcan.

Thank God it was at the top so you didn't have to rummage through it. Reading the note, you didn't know if you should feel offended because he didn't recognize your handwriting, or to be furious because someone actually dared to ask him on a date. You crumbled the note in your hand and made your way towards the bar.

Arriving at the bar you saw your boyfriend and the girl from yesterday. That made your blood boil so much more than before. Poor guy was looking around, searching for someone - you, while the girl was trying to make a good impression on him. You counted to twenty in your head, so you wouldn't jump at the girl first thing. Jungkook's face lighted up seeing you, although he realized something's not right.

"Excuse me" you tapped on the girl's shoulder "I would really appreciate it if you wouldn't try to shoot your shot with my boyfriend." You stepped beside Jungkook, who automatically back hugged you.

"He wasn't really rejecting me though" You’re gonna tear this bitch hair out

"Listen here you little - " a hand muffled your mouth.

"I didn't really give you the time of the day, I was just being nice and answered you" The girl's face turned red and stomped away from the bar.

"I should've known you wouldn't write me a letter" you hummed while turning towards him.

"Yeah, and you should've recognized my handwriting. I mean c'mon, how many times did I give you my notes in school."

Jungkook mumbled a quiet sorry. He looked like a kid, who was told not to eat any sweets until his vegetables were off from his plate. "What do you think about you, me, in my room doing a Frozen marathon?"

"Alright, but we have to stop at my parents' house first"

So that's what you did. After taking a shower Jungkook drove you to your childhood home. While you packed away your things, Jungkook had a quick chat with your dad ... about the lawn? You said bye to your mom and joined the two men at the porch.

"I'm ready" you said hugging your dad. He tightened his grip around you and with a serious expression he said to Jungkook

"No funny business" For a minute neither you nor Jungkook could say anything.

You couldn't tell why did your dad say that, and Jungkook probably shit himself. He started to stutter when your dad let out a big laugh. Hearing his laugh, Jungkook also let out an awkward chuckle.

"Alright dad, bye" You said and pulled Jungkook by his hand to his car.

"What the hell was that?" Jungkook asked once you were in the vehicle.

You shrugged "it's not like he doesn't know we do funny business"

"Don't call it that" He commanded, which lead you to repeat it like ten times.

Arriving at his house you helped his mom to make dinner. Following dinner, you started to watch Frozen.

"You know I love you right?" Jungkook asked after a while.

You were already half-asleep, you didn't have the strength to answer properly. You mumbled a quite love you too and snuggled closer to him. You were happily asleep after only moments.

#jungkook scenarios #jungkook drabble #jungkook x reader #jungkook fluff

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