#so obviously i think its a banging song

[art--harridan]

[Image description: A digital drawing of a shot from the film La semana del asesino. It shows three hands holding a pair of binoculars. The hands belong to the characters Marcos and Néstor, although it is unclear which hand belongs to who, as they are indiscernible from one another in size and colour. One hand cups the bottom, and two hold onto either side. You can see the beginning of both of their shoulders, with Marcos' shoulder on the right and Néstor's on the left. There is a vague suggestion of a room in the background, with panelling and curtains. The lineart is a dark blue, and has very pronounced shadows. The colours for each element do not have any shading or lighting outside of this, except for the gleam on the binoculars. The colour scheme is desaturated and cold, mostly comprising of blues with small sections of yellows or even orange (for the binoculars' strap).]

Inktober - Day 5 (Binoculars)

Film - La semana del asesino (Eloy de la Iglesia, 1972)

[v1si0n]

JUST GIVE ME A REASON (J.JH)🪐

SUMMARY: you didn’t think think you could possibly hate performing at your schools spring showcase until you were paired up with your mortal enemy, Jung Jaehyun. but you guys are singing a love song, and god knows what love songs do to youngins like you.

GENRE: enemies(ish) to lovers , college au, performance arts majors! y/n and jaehyun, humor, fluff, tiny bit of angst, lovers in denial but its just y/n LMFAO

WARNINGS: profanity, jokes about death, inaccurate depictions of performance arts majors, jaehyun and y/n are constantly at each others necks but in a kinda cute way…?

NOTES: AHHHHHH my first actual written piece!!!! i’ve had this fic partially finished for a LONG ass time and i’m finally releasing it for you lovelies to read💗💗💗hope you love it as much as i do :)

WORD COUNT: 15.5k

TAGLIST: @shiningnono @stickwme2 @mmjhh1998 @bluedbliss @peachfulnight

♪(๑ᴖ◡ᴖ๑)♪ (๑ᴖ◡ᴖ๑)♪ (๑ᴖ◡ᴖ๑)♪ (๑ᴖ◡ᴖ๑)♪ (๑ᴖ◡ᴖ๑)♪

its in the stars

it’s been written in the scars on our hearts

When Mark Lee told you that Professor Kim would choose the pairs for this year's talent show, you believed it wouldn’t be too bad.

You were wrong. So humiliatingly wrong.

There you were, staring at the bulletin board outside the classroom, shocked and angry to your very core. You read the line with your name over and over again hoping, praying, that it was somehow a typo.

“Jung Jaehyun?! He paired me with Jaehyun?” You shrieked, your best friends Mark and Donghyuck snickering from beside you.

“Hey, he’s a pretty good singer,” Mark nudges you. You glare at him and he holds his hands up in defense.

“He’s a dick is what he is, Mark! You can’t possibly tell me you still like him after what he did to me,” You huff. Mark is scared to answer, but much to his delight, Professor Kim steps out of the classroom to greet students.

“Ah, Y/N! I take it that you’ve seen who I partnered you up with,” he smiles.

“Prof, can I please switch? I’ll perform with anyone else just not him,” you plead and he laughs directly in your face.

“Nope. No changing or switching partners.”

Your eye twitches.

“Prof-“ Your voice is scarily low, and this cues Mark and Hyuck to whisk you into the classroom.

“I’ll kill him, I swear,” you grumble.

“Listen bub, just stick with it for this performance. Three weeks of rehearsal and two nights of performances. You can do that,” Hyuck says gently, patting your head in an attempt to calm you down.

You mumble a “fine” under your breath and make your way to your seat. You stare blankly as the students pile into the lecture hall, one of them being the one and only Jung Jaehyun himself. He catches your eye and smirks, obviously having seen the list outside the classroom. You see him stray away from his original seat, making a beeline for the empty seat next to you that you use to hold your bag.

“Hyuck, switch seats with me,” You slap his arm repeatedly.

“What? No, I always sit in the middle,” He brushes you off as he takes out his laptop.

“Mark?”

“Sur- Actually, I think I’m good,” He smirks.

You look at him in confusion and realize he’s watching Jaehyun as he approaches you. He taps Hyuck to alert him, and now they’re both laughing under their breaths. You make a mental note to get new friends.

Jaehyun is now standing in the aisle, beaming at you with a shit-eating grin on his stupid face.

“Hey partner, mind moving the bag?”

“The seats taken,”

“No, it’s not, just move your bag.”

“I don’t want to,”

“Y/N-”

“Here! I’ll take your bag my sweet,” Hyuck pipes up from next to you. You stare at him in horror as he takes your bag and winks at you, placing the bag under his feet.

“Thank you, Donghyuck,” Jaehyun smiles and plops himself down next to you.

“Of course Jaehyun! Any friend of Y/N’s is a friend of ours,” Mark quips, and you burrow your head in your hands with a groan.

You’re banging your head repeatedly on the table as the boys begin talking about the upcoming performance, and you silently pray to yourself that God would take you out at this very moment.

“Aw, don’t act like that, partner! We’re gonna have so much fun.”

Jaehyun puts his arm around you and pulls you closer to him, causing you to thrash around and accidentally elbow Hyuck in the chest. A loud groan is heard throughout the lecture hall and everyone turns to look at him, and Mark offers an apologetic smile.

“Donghyuck and Y/N. Let’s keep quiet back there, yeah?”

You both mumble apologies to Professor Kim and glare at each other. Mark shushes both of you and points toward the front of the class, and you direct your attention to the screen. The words “SPRING SHOWCASE” glare back at you in ugly bold letters.

“Students! As you all know, the spring showcase is only a month away. This year, the music department and I have decided to assign partners rather than letting you choose, as to avoid constant repeats.” (READ: Mark and Hyuck high-five under the table.)

A chorus of complaints is heard throughout the lecture hall, the loudest being you, Mark, and Hyuck. The Spring Showcase was your guys’ favourite time of the year because it meant you three doing what you love most together, then getting to show it to the entire school.

“Prof! The whole point of the spring showcase is to showcase our talents! What if we’re paired with people we don’t work well with?!” You exclaim, and Jaehyun scoffs next to you.

“Yeah, Prof! What if our partner constantly has a stick up her as-“

“Funny! Considering the fact that during the winter showcase the microphone stand actually almost went up your a-”

“That was the tech crew's fault! I didn’t know the mic would rise so soon!”

“Let's avoid talking about such things in the classroom, please.” Professor Kim pipes up. You both roll your eyes at each other and you feel Donghyuck pat your head again.

For the next hour, you’re pretty sure Professor Kim is probably mentioning crucial information about the spring showcase, but all you could think about was the living nuisance that was Jeong Jaehyun. His very presence next to you was driving you up the wall and knowing that you would have to see him every day for a month straight made your face feel hot with rage.

“That’s it for today's class! All pairs must submit their songs by the end of the week! Group rehearsals start as soon as every pair has submitted their song choice.”

Students start slowly trickling out of the lecture hall as others linger around to talk to friends. You slump down into your seat and stare into the distance, Mark and Donghyuck making small talk with Jaehyun as they pack their bags.

“Y/N? Are you listening?” Mark nudges your shoulder gently. You shake your head, still staring off into the distance.

“We said let’s go grab lunch near campus,” Hyuck holds your bag out for you.

“How can you even eat in this situation?” You sigh dramatically.

Your friends roll their eyes at you, while Jaehyun smiles, almost contently, at your misery. He puts a hand on your shoulder, causing you to scowl and turn your head to look at him.

“I’ll see you guys later. I’ll be waiting for your text partner,” He winks at you and you make a face.

“Please run in front of a bus.”

“Only if you’re next to me!” He calls out as he leaves the lecture hall.

You decide right then and there that it wouldn’t be too bad if you were sentenced to death row.

*･゜ﾟ･*:.｡..｡.:*･'♪(๑ᴖ◡ᴖ๑)♪'･*:.｡. .｡.:*･゜ﾟ･*

Fridays usually meant two things for you and your friends: One, the canteen would be serving ice cream, and two, all of your classes ended early.

With that being said, it became a tradition for you three to meet after class at your designated table in the canteen with your respective ice cream cups in hand. However, this Friday was a little different.

“Is that Y/N I see?”

You’re picking at Donghyucks ice cream when you hear an aggravating voice shout from across the room. You cower in your seat out of embarrassment, your friends snickering at the boy desperately trying to get your attention. He rushes over and slides into the seat across from you.

“Y/N? My dearest partner?”

“What the hell do you want, Jaehyun?” you say through gritted teeth.

“Aw, did our sweet little princess Y/N not get enough sleep?” He reaches over to pat your head and you swat his hand away. “Did you think about what song you wanted to do with me?”

“Just give me a reason,” you mumble with a mouthful of ice cream.

“Um, for the showcase? For an honors student, you’re kinda dumb, babe.”

You choke on your ice cream and Mark stifles a laugh from beside you.

“The song. Just Give Me A Reason by P!nk and Nate Ruess.”

Jaehyuns smirk falters. The tips of his ears glow red as Donghyuck stares at him with judgment written all over his sunkissed features.

“Yeah, right.” He clears his throat and rubs the back of his neck. You could practically see the gears turning in his head as he searches for a comeback. “Bit of a hard song for you, no?”

“Worry about yourself and your pre-pubescent voice cracks,” You state calmly, not having to look at him to know you struck a chord.

“That happened-“ He shouts, lowering his voice upon realizing he was getting stares from the people around him, “years ago. My throat was dry.”

“It was last year,” Mark states, earning a pointed glare from Jaehyun.

“Whatever!” He throws his hands up in exasperation and stands up to leave.

“So that’s a yes?” You call after him as he walks away from the table, and he flips you off in return. You take that as a yes.

“Good song choice for you guys to fall in love,” Hyuck mumbles as he licks his spoon clean.

“Pardon?” You raise an eyebrow at him.

“A love song for lovebirds. Good one,” He says almost matter of factly, and you look around the cafeteria.

“Are the lovebirds in the room with us?”

“He’s not wrong, you know. Every boy/girl duo that has done a love song ended up in a relationship within 24 hours of the showcase,” Mark points his spoon around as he talks.

“You guys seriously believe that? It’s just Music Department superstition, nothing else to it.”

You swirl your spoon inside your cup of melted chocolate ice cream as you ponder. You vaguely recall the buzz around the two seniors last year who kissed on stage after their duet.

“I can’t believe you’d call it superstition! It’s deep rooted lore thats an important part of our history as music students!” Donghyuck exaggerates.

You roll your eyes as he begins his deep dive into the stories surrounding your department. As he nears the end of his rambling, you feel a tap on your shoulder and turn.

“Yes, Soojin?” You muster a smile as you look at the girl in front of you.

Kang Soojin. Your campuses day one it girl and the bane of your existence. To be fair, you would’ve never had a problem with her had she been a decent human being towards you from the start, but for some unknown reason you found yourself bearing the brunt of her hatred since highschool.

“Why was Jae just talking to you?” Her high-pitched voice pierces your ears and you wince.

“Who?”

“Jaehyun? Jung Jaehyun? Don’t act stupid,” She snaps.

“Oh, he’s my partner for the spring showcase. He was asking what song we should do,” You blink at her.

“Try not to stick around him too much. You’ll rub off on him and I don’t need that,” She snickers before turning on her heel and walking away.

You’re left absolutely flabbergasted, processing her words before turning to your friends with your mouth agape.

“What the fuck?” You whisper, struggling to come to terms with what just happened.

“She does not play about Jaehyun,” Mark lets out a low whistle.

“Why is she talking to me like I want to be around him? I was literally forced into this,” You huff.

“Wait, hold on,” Hyuck starts, hands beckoning you and Mark to come closer. “You guys know Johnny? I heard him telling Doyoung that Jaehyun rejected Soojin in front of all her friends on Valentine's Day. She cried and everything.”

“What an asshole. No wonder why the poor girl is always pissy,” You mumble.

“Maybe she’s pissy towards you because her man wants you,” Mark wiggles his eyebrows and you make a face.

“Ew, no. Never put that into the universe,” You shake your finger at him.

“You won’t be saying that after the spring showcase,” Hyuck sings, licking the last bit of ice cream off his spoon.

You mumble profanities under your breath and narrow your eyes at the boy in front of you, but a tinge of anxiety bubbles in your stomach. As sure as you were that you could never possibly develop feelings for Jaehyun, you truly don’t know what could happen after spending that much time together.

You shudder. You can’t afford to spiral too deep into your thoughts right now, especially in front of Mark and Donghyuck who watch your every reaction like hawks. You let out a fake cough in an attempt to regain composure.

“So, what should we get for lunch?”

*･゜ﾟ･*:.｡..｡.:*･'♪(๑ᴖ◡ᴖ๑)♪'･*:.｡. .｡.:*･゜ﾟ･*

your head is running wild again

my dear, we still have everything

Your first week of rehearsals with Jaehyun was nothing short of a nightmare.

His incessant teasing and nitpicking had begun to drive you up the wall, and quite frankly you don’t think you’ve ever been closer to crashing out.

“Professor! Y/N won’t act like she’s in love with me and it’s ruining the stage chemistry!” Jaehyun calls out from the stage, much like a fifth grader snitching to their teacher.

It was a Friday evening in the auditorium where your class had been rehearsing for the spring showcase. You and Jaehyun had barely finished singing before his features were taken over by his stupid signature smirk and he asked to stop the song.

“Um, while I don’t believe she needs to pretend to be in love with you, I do believe you are lacking a bit of emotion, Y/N. This is a love song, and well, you don’t exactly look too pleased to be sharing the stage with Jaehyun,” Professor Kim articulates carefully, looking at you expectantly as if he could see the impending breakdown written all over your features.

You offer a tight-lipped smile to your professor, knowing that he was right but you could not, for the life of you, muster a smile in Jaehyun’s presence. “Can another pair go now? I need a minute.”

Professor Kim nods and you quickly walk off, stomping backstage and down the stairs before beelining for the auditorium exit. You push the doors open and step into the corridor, huffing out a breath as you try to collect yourself.

“Great, this is the perfect spot for us to practice,” Jaehyun pipes up from behind you as he shuts the door.

“God, why did you follow me?” You groan, making the mistake of turning around just in time for him to run right into you, “Ever heard of personal space?”

“I’m practicing,” He shrugs, not budging from his spot. You attempt to take a step back but he steps forward, and you swear you were on the verge of a psychotic break.

“Jaehyun, if you don’t step the fuck back-“

“You need to be better at pretending that you love me, so I’m helping you,” He remarks, his smirk widening at the way your face flushes.

“What the hell are you talking about? I don’t need your help,” You put both hands on his chest to push him away, but your efforts prove to be useless when he grabs both of your wrists with one hand and tugs them down.

You can feel the embarrassment start to settle in at the realization that Jaehyun was definitely trying to get a reaction out of you right now, and it was definitely working in his favor. Each step you took back, he took forward, his hand still holding onto your wrists.

“Now if I’m not mistaken,” He pauses, tapping his chin thoughtfully, stepping forward and effectively trapping you against the wall of the corridor, “I think you have a little crush on me, sweetheart.”

You try to rack your brain for any sort of comeback, but all that comes out of you is a weak scoff, “You are mistaken.”

Jaehyun chuckles darkly at your weak argument, the sound sending chills up your spine as you press yourself impossibly closer to the wall.

“Is that so? Is that why you can’t even look me in the eye right now?” He lowers his head so that you’re both face to face, and your cheeks burn a bright red when you indeed can’t meet his scrutinizing glare.

“That’s what I thought,” He scoffs, releasing your hands in favor or pressing both of his against the wall behind you, efficiently caging you in between his arms. “Tell me sweetheart, why do you keep pretending that you hate me?”

The question catches you off guard, your brows furrowing at the accusation that was just thrown at you. You manage to regain your composure for long enough to speak up, “What makes you think I’m pretending?”

“Just a feeling I have,” He shrugs, “and maybe because I let both of your hands go for quite some time now and you have yet to push me away. Would you like to tell me why that is?”

You look down at both of your hands and back up at him, heat rushing up your neck and painting your cheeks a scarlet hue. You shove his chest and let out an exhale when you’re free from the confines of his arms. You mentally curse yourself for standing there gawking at him like an idiot instead of pushing away sooner.

“Both of our lives would be much easier if you admitted it, Y/N,” He sing-songs from behind you, his voice giving away the obvious smirk that was plastered on his face.

“Admitted what?” You turn around with your arms crossed.

“That you like our little game. That you don’t hate me like you want everyone to believe,” He states simply, tucking his hands into his pants pocket.

Something about the way he was so sure of himself almost convinced you that he was right, that maybe you put on this act because there was something ugly and complex buried beneath the surface. Before you can allow your thoughts to consume the space between you and Jaehyun, you shake your head to get rid of them completely.

“You’re delusional,” You mumble weakly, turning to walk back into the auditorium. You can hear Jaehyun’s laugh from behind you and you grimace, quickly walking back to your spot where Mark and Donghyuck look at you with taunting eyes.

“So…you and Jaehyun took quite some time outside. Mind sharing with the class what you two did that has you looking like that?” Hyuck rests his chin in the palm of his hand as he tilts his head curiously at you.

“Looking like what?” You frantically smooth a hand over your hair, uselessly tugging at your top as you try to remain presentable.

“Let’s see. Red cheeks, shaky hands, glossy eyes, and,” Mark pauses to lean in closer to you, inhaling briefly before he nods and pulls away with a hum, “You smell like him.”

Your eyes widen as you bring your arm up to your nose, cursing when the familiar scent of Jaehyun’s cologne tickles your nostrils. “It’s not what you think, we just talked.”

Donghyuck furrows his eyebrows with a slight pout, rubbing his chin in mock thought. “Now, correct me if I’m wrong Mark, but talking to someone usually doesn’t end up with you smelling like them. Am I correct?”

“I’m afraid you are correct, Donghyuck. I’m curious, Y/N. Do you usually go home smelling like one of us after we’ve talked?” Mark prods, and you groan, running a hand over your face in frustration as your friends continue to tease you.

As Mark and Donghyuck continue their unrelenting jokes beside you, your eyes flicker towards Jaehyun’s form as he walks back into the auditorium with his hands in his pockets. His eyes catch yours and his lips immediately curl into a smirk, his left eye dropping to a wink as he regards you with a hint of amusement on his features.

Despite the way you narrow your eyes at him, your body almost doesn’t allow you to look away from him even after his eyes refocus on your professor. Your eyes trail from his eyes to his nose, stopping involuntarily at his lips as he rubs them together. You’re entranced by the way his tongue darts out to wet the surface, and you grow more frustrated by the second at the way the beating of your heart betrays the nagging in your brain that tells you to look away.

For a second, you’re almost convinced he’s doing this on purpose, putting on a show because he knows you’re watching, and your suspicions are confirmed when he turns his head to the side to look at you, his smirk resurfacing when he notices the way your eyes remain on him.

You will yourself to look away, clearing your throat as you try to calm the drumming in your chest. You straighten your posture in the uncomfortable wooden seat before your phone vibrates in your lap and you try to look down at it without drawing Mark or Hyuck’s attention.

jaehyun: still denying it?

*･゜ﾟ･*:.｡..｡.:*･'♪(๑ᴖ◡ᴖ๑)♪'･*:.｡. .｡.:*･゜ﾟ･*

you’re not broken just bent

and we can learn to love again

Monday mornings were on the long list of things you didn’t like.

It was the only day out of the week that you had a 9 AM class, and to make matters worse you shared that class with none other than the anti-christ himself.

“Psst. Y/N,” Jaehyun whispers from the seat behind you.

You rub at your temples and take a deep breath, doing your best to remain calm and not commit aggravated assault.

As your professor walks in, you turn to get your laptop out of your bag, only to notice it wasn’t hanging on the back of your seat where you left it. You turn to the boy behind you with a pointed glare, and your eyes flick down to your bag in his lap.

“Jaehyun,” You warn.

“Y/N,” He mocks your tone.

“Give it back,” You reach over to grab your bag but he leans back to avoid your touch.

“Why should I?” He teases.

You pinch the bridge of your nose to ease the headache that was forming. “You’re holding my bag and you’re asking me why I need it back?”

“Tell me what you need and I can give it to you,” A taunting smile makes its way onto his face and you feel your composure slowly slipping.

“Jaehyun, I swear to fucking God if you don’t-“

“Alright students, let’s begin our lesson for today. I need all eyes to the front,” Your professor's voice cuts through the room and you clench your jaw.

“You probably need your laptop, don’t you?” Jaehyun jeers, pulling your laptop out and waving it in front of your face. You start to wonder what you did in your past life to deserve this kind of karma.

You grab the laptop from his hands before he can change his mind, turning your attention toward the powerpoint that’s projected onto the screen.

As your professor carries through the lesson, you type your notes fervently to keep up with his words. Your laptop dings and a notification pops up in the corner, causing your eyes to divert from the powerpoint to your screen. Your face sours when you see Jaehyun trying to Airdrop something to you, and you quickly hit decline before refocusing on your professor. You’re only able to regain your focus for a few seconds before another ding catches your attention. You decline the Airdrop request, pulling out your phone and typing out a rather angry message to the idiot behind you.

you: can you stop being annoying im actually trying to pay attention

jaehyun: you’re texting me🥺🥺🥺

jaehyun: what’d you save my name as ;)

you: jaehyun ???????

jaehyun: no heart emojis ?? wheres the love ;(

you: there is none

you: now leave me the FUCK alone or you won’t make it home after class

jaehyun: just accept the airdrop i promise you won’t regret it :))

You roll your eyes at the message before a notification pops up on your phone that makes your jaw drop. It was an Airdrop request from Jaehyun, your screen showing a picture of him standing in the mirror shirtless with his sweatpants hanging low on his hips. You ogle for longer than you’d like to admit, your eyes scanning the dips of his abs and the way his hip bones peek out from the waistband of his sweats. You shake yourself out of your daze, tapping the screen rapidly to decline the request. You see a message from Jaehyun pop up.

jaehyun: like what you see baby?

You peek over your shoulder with your face twisted in disgust and Jaehyun winks at you.

you: not in the slightest

You shut your phone off and put it face down on your desk, attempting to return your attention towards the lesson in front of you, but much to your dismay your mind reels with thoughts of the picture Jaehyun had sent you. The image he sent sears itself into your brain and your heart beats a little quicker against your own will. You clench your teeth in anger that you could only really direct at yourself and the way your mind has begun to waver when it comes to Jaehyun, the line between hatred and something thats definitely not that blurring more as the days go by.

“That’s it for today! Enjoy the rest of your week and I’ll see you next Monday,” Your professor's voice brings you out of your daze, your eyes darting around as if you were afraid that anyone could read your thoughts.

“Still thinking about it?” Jaehyun’s lips are dangerously close to the shell of your ear and you jump in your seat.

“Personal space, Jaehyun, Jesus fucking Christ,” You pant with a hand on your chest.

“Seems like you were a little distracted. Penny for your thoughts?” He teases, leaning his arms on the back of your chair as you gather your belongings.

“Thinking about ways to get rid of your body,” You mutter, reaching out to grab your bag but he holds his arm above his head.

“Not so fast, sweetheart,” He tuts. “Walk with me to my next class.”

“What’s with you today? Did you wake up this morning and decide that making me miserable was your goal?” You question.

“Just feeling a little lonely,” He shrugs, and you try to search his features for any signs of humor, your lips turning down into a frown when you realize he wasn’t joking.

“Oh,” You trail off, feeling a strange tug at your heart when he looks at you expectantly. “Whatever. Lead the way.”

He bounces on the balls of his feet before exiting the classroom with you in tow. He walks towards the glass doors that lead to the courtyard and you stop abruptly.

“Is your class in another building?” You quirk a brow.

“Yeah, something like that,” He smirks, eyes glinting with mischief as he turns back around and you continue to trail behind him.

You follow him as he walks off campus and eventually into the school's parking lot, your eyes narrowing at the back of his head as you stop in your tracks.

“You don’t have another class today, do you?” You stand with a hand on your hip as he turns around scratching his neck.

“Not really,” He laughs sheepishly, “but I need to ask you for a favor.”

“You couldn’t just ask me after class? You had to lie to me and practically kidnap me?” You look at him bewildered.

“I wanted to ask you in private,” He frowns.

“We’re in an open parking lot, Jaehyun.”

He looks around, suddenly realizing that there are students bustling around the parking lot. The tips of his ears burn a bright red as you run a hand through your hair in exasperation.

“Okay, whatever, I’ll just ask you. I need you to be my date for the sports banquet this Friday.”

You tilt your head quizzically, eyebrows furrowing as you look at the boy in front of you,“You’re joking, right?” You laugh.

“I’m serious,” He winces when your laugh trails off, shutting his eyes as if expecting you to freak out any moment now.

“Of all the people you know, you decided to ask me? What gave you the impression that this would be a good idea?” You question him slowly.

“I-okay hear me out. I needed a date and I can’t ask any of the girls I know because A. I’ve hooked up with some of them and B. they were already asked by my other friends and I can’t be the only one without a date Y/N, that shit is so embarrassing-”

“Okay, stop,” You hold a hand up to cut off his rambling and he quickly closes his mouth.

You ponder for a moment as you stare at Jaehyun, who shifts his weight from one foot to the other as he looks down at the ground. You’ve never seen him this nervous, his hands fidgeting with the keychains hanging from your bag that he’s still holding and his foot tapping on the ground. You don’t know what takes over you as you clear your throat to speak up.

“You owe me,” You mumble.

His eyes widen as he stares at you, expecting you to laugh in his face and say you were kidding, but when that never comes a smile slowly spreads across his features.

“You’re serious, right? Seriously serious? You can’t take it back- actually, I’m going to RSVP for the both of us right now,” He pulls out his phone and types quickly, and you find his excitement rather endearing. You catch yourself smiling and your face drops.

When the fuck did Jung Jaehyun become endearing to you?

You snatch your bag away from him as he types on his phone. “Text me the details. I’m going home,” You stammer, frantically swinging your bag over your shoulder and turning around.

“Wait, I can drive you!” He calls after you but you wave your hand in dismissal, pulling up your recent calls on your phone and tapping on the first name on the list as you speed walk away from Jaehyun.

“Donghyuck. You and Mark at my apartment tonight. I’ve lost my fucking mind.”

*･゜ﾟ･*:.｡..｡.:*･'♪(๑ᴖ◡ᴖ๑)♪'･*:.｡. .｡.:*･゜ﾟ･*

you stole my heart

and i, your willing victim

“And then I said yes! Like a fucking loser with no ounce of dignity, I said yes! Is that not the craziest, most batshit insane thing I’ve ever done?”

Mark and Donghyuck are currently sat at your kitchen island, distractedly munching on the array of snacks you put out for them as you debrief them on the events that had occurred earlier in the day.

“I had absolutely no reason to say yes. But it's like, he looked so nervous and I felt bad? Why the fuck did I feel bad?!” You huff angrily, squinting your eyes at your best friends when you notice them wordlessly chewing.

“Hello? A little bit of engagement would be appreciated, guys,” You wave a hand in front of their faces.

“Do you have juice or something? These chips are dry as fuck,” Donghyuck gets up to sift through your fridge.

“Are you even listening to me? Mark, what do you think?” You shift your attention to the glasses-wearing boy in front of you.

“I think,” He hums, staring off into the distance as he chews slowly on a tortilla chip, “that these chips need dip. Pass me the guac, Hyuck.”

“Mark!” You whine, your friend putting his hands up in defense as he takes the container of guacamole from Donghyuck.

“Bub, you’re not gonna like what we say so I don’t think there's any point in us saying it,” Donghyuck shrugs, sipping on the bottle of iced tea he took from your fridge.

“Anything is better than nothing. I’m all ears,” You push your hair behind your ears and motion for them to continue.

“I think you did it because you have feelings for him,” Hyuck states matter of factly and Mark draws his lips into a thin line while nodding.

“Wrong. Next,” You dismiss, the boys in front of you shrugging at your denial.

“Okay, next is he probably likes you too,” Mark points out.

“Even more wrong. Can we start being realistic please?” You plead, groaning when your friends shake their heads.

“Think about it! That man knows more women than you know people-“

“Okay, rude-“

“Yet he chose the one girl who, allegedly, hates him and isn’t trying to hop on his dick. He is very obviously into you, or at the very least he’s interested.”

Donghyuck’s hands are on his hips now, Mark nodding enthusiastically along to every word.

“Amen, brother,” Mark raises his hand in praise.

You roll your eyes at the two boys, scowling at the thought of any potential feelings involving Jaehyun.

“It was because he hooked up with all of them already and they all hate him!” You defend yourself. Mark and Donghyuck share a look.

“Is that what he told you?” Mark quirks a brow.

“Yes.”

Your friends share another series of knowing looks, smirks slowly adorning their features as your eyes bounce between them in confusion.

“Stop looking at each other and speak!” You shout impatiently.

“Jung Jaehyun, notorious non hooker-upper, told you that he hooked up with so many women that he’s out of options? That’s funny,” Hyuck snorts.

You blink, your eyebrows furrowing in confusion as you process the words you just heard.

“What are you talking about?” You ask.

“Oh poor little Y/N. So caught up in her own little world that she doesn’t know any campus gossip,” Mark rounds the corner of your kitchen island and swings an arm around your shoulders, ruffling your hair gently.

“What gossip?” You swat him off.

“Bub, Jaehyun doesn’t do hook ups. He has not hooked up with a single girl on campus, especially not the ones who throw themselves at him every single day like Soojin.”

You tilt your head to the side as the gears in your brain start turning. You could have sworn you heard stories of his fuckboy antics, his friend group being known throughout campus for having an ongoing hookup counter.

“Johnny and Yuta fuck anything that moves. I don’t doubt he’s the same way,” You laugh nervously, anxiety bubbling in your stomach at the way your friends study your reactions.

“His whole schtick is that he’s different from his friends. That’s why he’s such a babe magnet,” Mark sighs defeatedly and Donghyuck pats his shoulder in mock sympathy.

You let the information marinate for a second, the fuckboy image you’ve built of Jung Jaehyun slowly coming crashing down as you pick apart every rumor you’ve ever heard.

“Look at her face, you can tell she’s realizing she was wrong about him,” Donghyuck murmurs to Mark, breaking you from your train of thoughts.

“I-I’m-I wasn’t wrong! The rumors had to start from somewhere!” Your argument comes out weakly, making Mark and Donghyuck shake their heads in disapproval.

“See, now she’s denying reality. Poor thing,” Mark fake cries into Hyuck’s shoulder.

“Guys!” You whine.

“Alright, alright we’re just joking. But in all seriousness, sooner or later you’re gonna have to accept the fact that he’s not a bad guy and if you weren’t so dead set on hating him for something he did when he was in highschool, you’d probably be jumping his bones because lets face it, the sexual tension between you two is suffocating, and everyone loves a good enemies to lovers.”

You gawk at Donghyuck as he sips from his bottle calmly.

“I’m not gonna lie Y/N, for lack of better wording, he ate you up with that,” Mark pipes up after a beat of silence.

“I’m-you-whatever! I’m going to my room, don’t wreck my place,” You mumble as you retreat back towards your bedroom.

“We’re sleeping over!” Hyuck calls after you and you wave a dismissive hand in the air, knowing all too well that they knew your apartment like the backs of their hands.

When you reach the solace of your bedroom, you shut the door softly as your friends begin to argue over what movie to watch for the night. Your thoughts dizzy you as you slowly crawl on top of your sheets and hug a pillow close to your chest.

You wanted to believe that Jaehyun was a liar and that he somehow was able to trick your friends into believing he was a good guy. You wanted so desperately to believe that you were right, and that your long lived hatred for him has always been valid.

You think back to highschool, the teenage angst and awkwardness of it all making you cringe internally as you reminisce. As if it happened days ago, the image of you and Jaehyun on the bleachers during field day remains vivid in your mind. Every detail is burned into your memory; the way the wind felt, the sound of the students laughter that rang throughout the field, and even more specifically the way Jaehyun’s cheeks were tinted a light pink as he spoke to you.

“Are you saying that you, Jung Jaehyun, haven’t had your first kiss yet and we’re in our senior year?” You arch your brow at him, shifting the lollipop in your mouth to the side as you peer at him curiously.

“Oh, come on, don’t act all high and mighty. You haven’t had yours either!” He exclaims with a finger pointed at you. You shush him with a hand over his mouth, and he puts his hands up in mock surrender.

“That’s a different story! You..you’re Jung Jaehyun. Literally all the girls in our graduating class have dreamt about kissing you since freshmen year. You got the most cheers at the talent show last year even though you looked dumb as fuck singing ‘All I Want For Christmas is You’ in that Rudolph sweater,” You snort at the memory as the tips of Jaehyun’s ears are painted scarlet.

“Just because I allegedly have options, doesn’t mean I want any of them to be my first kiss,” He huffs, “And look who’s talking! We’re in the same boat, you know.”

You narrow your eyes at him scrutinizingly, “What are you talking about? If I had guys throwing themselves at me, maybe I would have had my first kiss by now.”

“What about Mark or Donghyuck? I’m surprised neither of them have asked you out yet.”

“Ew, what? They’re my best friends,” You look out onto the field where Mark is currently chasing Donghyuck with an inflatable flamingo in his hands. “I could never date them. And I’m almost certain Hyuck has already kissed Mark at some point.”

Jaehyun raises his eyebrows at the information he just heard, shrugging his shoulders as he watches your best friends with you. “Besides them. It’s hard to believe you don’t have guys throwing themselves at you. You’re…not ugly.”

It was your turn to blush at his bold statement, your hands instinctively coming up to tousle your hair shyly, “Same goes for you…I guess.”

Theres an awkward tension in the air as you two avoid eye contact with each other, opting to look out onto the field where Mark now has Donghyuck in a headlock. After a few moments of suffocating silence between you two, Jaehyun speaks up.

“What if we were each others first kiss?”

You choke on your own spit at his words, coughing erratically as you clap a hand over your chest in an attempt to stop. When you manage to catch your breath, you look at him in bewilderment, searching his eyes for any signs of humor but finding none.

“Are you serious?”

“Why not? We both haven’t had ours yet, and it’d be better than losing our first kiss to a stranger,” He shrugs a little too nonchalantly at the suggestion, and your face twists even more in confusion.

You stare at him for a moment as you think about his suggestion, his logic making more sense than you’d like to admit. You become increasingly aware of the butterflies in your stomach and the drumming in your chest as you continue to stare at him, and you force yourself to look away as you clear your throat.

“I guess it’s not a bad idea,” You mumble, and you hear him let out a breath.

“Great. Meet me in front of the vending machines in 15 minutes,” He shoots you a wink before getting up from his spot next to you and walking off the field, your eyes following his movements as he disappears from your line of vision.

You look down at the digital watch on your arm, watching as a minute passes, then five, then ten. When the fifteen minutes have passed you stand from your seat, taking in a deep breath before walking in the same direction that Jaehyun went. You could feel your heartbeat quickening as you near the vending machines and you wipe your clammy palms on your pants before you round the corner, your mouth opening in shock as you watch the scene that unfolds before you.

There, in front of the vending machines, stood Jung Jaehyun with his back facing you, and a rather happy looking Kang Soojin with her lips attached to his.

You don’t waste another second before you stomp away from the two of them, your cheeks burning in embarrassment as you angrily wipe away the stray tear that made its way down your cheek. You mentally curse yourself for getting your hopes up in the first place, the excited buzz you felt earlier being replaced with an overwhelming sense of stupidity. You let out a bitter laugh.

You suppose you were quite the idiot for believing that someone like Jaehyun could ever make space for someone like you in his heart.

A wave of embarrassment washes over you as you recall the events that happened that day and you shudder, urging your brain to think about anything else so you could bury that memory.

The moment of him asking you to the sports banquet pops into your head, the genuine excited glimmer in his eyes when you said yes still fresh in your memory making you sigh. As easy as it was to accept the rumors as truth, the way your friends spoke of him riddled your head with uncertainty. He was one of the few people you could never read, and if you were honest you found yourself thinking about him lately, more often than you’d like to admit.

You squeeze your eyes shut and shake your head, physically trying to rid your brain of Jaehyun. You open your bedroom door to the sounds of what you could only assume to be Despicable Me and you smile, knowing it was Mark’s idea and Donghyuck was probably pouting on your couch right now. When you walk out you’re greeted to the exact sight you were expecting to see.

“Y/N, he’s making me watch this stupid fucking minion movie again,” Hyuck whines from one corner of your couch.

“Stupid minion movie? That’s literally you!” Mark points at the screen when a minion pops up.

You don’t know what it is but the presence of your two best friends eases the racing of your mind, a small smile decorating your features as you watch them argue back and forth about who was more of a minion.

“Why are you just standing there? We left your spot open!” Hyuck pats the spot between them that you claimed as yours ages ago. After you settle yourself between them, you feel Mark pat your head and you turn to him.

“Stop thinking so much, it’s bad for your brain. You’re gonna end up like Hyuck,” He smiles reassuringly at you and you don’t even get the chance to smile back before a handful of popcorn is launched in his direction.

“What does that even mean? My brain and I are perfectly functional, thank you very much,” Hyuck huffs from beside you.

“Don’t throw food!” Mark exclaims before promptly picking up the pieces of popcorn that were scattered on his lap and popping them into his mouth.

Even with the grimace on your face and the sound of Donghyuck going off on a tangent about how he has a higher IQ than Mark, you couldn’t be more thankful that your mind had started to stray far away from Jaehyun.

You just hope it could stay that way.

*･･*:.｡..｡.:*･'♪(๑ᴖ◡ᴖ๑)♪'･*:.｡. .｡.:*･゜ﾟ･*

you’re still written in the scars on my heart

If you had realized sooner that getting ready for a banquet would be this stressful, you might have said no a lot easier.

As you viciously pat powder onto your face, Donghyuck stands in front of your closet door with a steamer to your dress and Mark wipes down your shoes.

“Are we sure you’re not going to bust your ass in these?” Mark holds up one of the heels and examines it.

“She’s fine. Don’t talk to her, she's already running behind schedule,” Donghyuck barks from his corner of your room.

“What’s his problem?” Mark quirks a brow in your direction.

“He’s a little upset because I dragged him to the mall with me this morning to get those because I forgot about shoes,” You point at the heels in Marks hand.

“I told you to have everything ready like what, a week ago? And now here we are running to Macy’s of all places to find you a pair of shoes?” Donghyuck nags as you two speed walk through the mall.

“God, why did I not bring Mark instead of you? I should have known you’d be no help,” You grumble under your breath.

“First of all, Mark couldn’t tell a stiletto from a kitten heel. You need my expertise if you’re gonna be Jung Jaehyuns date,” Hyuck scoffs.

“Not his date! His plus one!” You exclaim dramatically, cowering slightly when you realize you might have been too loud.

“Date and plus one are the same thing, but okay. Let’s just find you a nice pair of black platforms with ankle straps to go with your dress,” Donghyuck claps his hands together as you gawk at him for even knowing what that was.

The memory of Donghyuck and you this morning makes you giggle as you sweep glitter onto your eyelids.

“Don’t laugh! You’re gonna crease your makeup!” Hyuck shouts at you as he looks through your jewelry box and holds up different pairs of earrings next to you.

“Hyuck, you seem to be more into this than Y/N. Do you want to take her place?” Mark snickers.

“Oh, excuse me for not wanting my best friend to embarrass herself at the biggest event of the school year,” Donghyuck rolls his eyes dramatically, holding up a pair of sparkly silver hoops to your face, “Yes! These are it.”

“It’s just another sports banquet. They have like, ten of them every year,” You shrug.

“Just another sports banquet is absolutely insane, Y/N. You do realize he’s not even on the hockey team and yet he was still invited? Do you know why?” Hyuck has a hand on his hip as he stares at you expectantly.

“…He’s not on the hockey team?”

“Because of his friends! Johnny and Yuta are our schools top hockey stars and every year, they invite him to that damn banquet because you know whats better than two hot guys in suits? Three hot guys in suits. They are the trio, Y/N, and everyone there is on the same level of hot and popular as them, if not more. That banquet you’re going to is literally just an excuse for all the popular kids to show off their parents money and get hyped up for their shitty gameplay,” Donghyuck lets out in one breath and you feel your hands start to slightly tremble.

“Well, now you got her all nervous, dumbass. I’m pretty sure he didn’t tell her for a reason!” Mark points out and Donghyuck looks at you with worried eyes.

“Oh god, please don’t start crying or sweating, your makeup is almost done,” He gently smoothes a hand over your hair and you swat him away.

“I’m fine. A little nervous now, thanks to you, but nothing I can’t handle,” You mumble quietly to hide the shaking in your voice.

A ding! causes all of you to freeze in your spots and look at each other, Mark being the first one to move as he grabs your phone and unplugs it from the charger.

“Jaehyun says “be there in 10 sweetheart” with a heart emoji. Sweetheart?!” He exclaims as he reads the message on your phone over again.

“That’s not the point! He’s almost here and I’m not dressed!” You yelp as you douse your face in setting spray.

“Okay, its go time! Get dressed and take your hair out of the rollers. If he comes, I’ll greet him at the door and distract him so you have time for shoes and perfume. Go!” Hyuck claps his hands together and drags Mark out of the room with him. You walk up to your dress and remove the hanger, slipping into it quickly and easily zipping it up yourself. You walk towards your mirror and your eyes slightly widen at your own appearance.

You’ve grown so accustomed to your usual casual attire that the sight of you in a dress almost feels foreign, and you find yourself turning side to side to admire the way the dress accentuates your features.

“Heels,” You whisper to yourself before you perch yourself on the edge of your bed and begin strapping on the black heels Donghyuck picked out for you earlier in the day.

You hear your apartment door open and you recognize Jaehyuns voice as he greets Donghyuck and Mark. You mutter curses to yourself as you quickly spray on your perfume and deodorant, letting them dry down as you pack your purse with your necessities for the night.

You become increasingly aware of the anxiety that settles in the pit of your stomach at the thought of Jaehyun seeing you all dressed up, and you find yourself involuntarily double checking your appearance in the mirror. You take a deep breath before opening your bedroom door.

“Just have her back by midnight latest. It gets a little creepy around here at night,” You hear Donghyuck say and you shake your head in disbelief at your friend.

“Hyuck, I’m not your daughter you know,” You call out as you walk out of your bedroom, all three sets of eyes landing on you.

Donghyuck wipes a fake tear from his eye as he looks at you and Mark lets out a low whistle as he admires your form.

“You look great, bub. I did a great job,” Hyuck pats himself on the back and you roll your eyes, slowly turning your head to gauge Jaehyun’s reaction.

He stands impressively still as his eyes rake up and down your body, and you want to cower instinctively at his almost predatory gaze. His eyes trail up your body to finally meet your eyes and you swear there’s a hint of something, but Mark claps a hand in front of his face and it goes away in an instant.

“Hey. Stop staring at my best friend like that,” Mark scowls, regarding Jaehyun with caution as he narrows his eyes at him.

Jaehyun clears his throat, straightening his shoulders before turning to Mark with a smirk, “Is it my fault this is my first time seeing her in something that isn’t her church girl clothes?”

“Church girl clothes? I dress perfectly normal, thank you very much,” You scoff, walking towards the front door, looking at Jaehyun expectantly. “Are you coming or what?”

Donghyuck and Mark watch with knowing smiles as Jaehyun walks towards the front door, his eyes never leaving your figure as he stands next to you.

“Wait!”

You both turn your heads at Donghyucks voice, and you’re nearly blinded by the flash that goes off. When you regain your vision, you see Hyuck holding up his digital camera, and you groan.

“Dude!” You whine, Jaehyun chuckling as he gently guides you out of your apartment.

“Have fun listening to EDM all night! And make sure you stay away from Yangyang!” Mark calls out as you step into the hallway of your apartment building and you raise an eyebrow. When the door of your apartment finally closes, Jaehyun turns to you, his dimples on full display as he gives you a quick once over.

“Ready, my lady?” He offers his hand out to you and you scowl, ignoring the way your heart thumps a little harder at his offer to hold hands.

“You seriously owe me one, asshole. Let’s get this over with,” You mutter, walking away from him and towards the elevators.

Jaehyun watches you with an unreadable expression plastered on his face as you walk in front of him, and he lets out a laugh, speaking low enough for only him to hear.

“Let’s get it over with.”

･*:.｡. .｡.:*･゜ﾟ･*

One hour into the banquet and you were starting to think that Mark had some sort of psychic ability.

Shitty EDM blasts through the speakers and you gulp down the remainder of your champagne with a grimace. Your eyes flit around the room, landing on Liu Yangyang as he shotguns a beer in the corner with Johnny. A chorus of cheers erupt when Johnny finishes first and he receives several pats on his back as he makes his way over to you, wiping his mouth with the back of his hand.

“You need another drink, pretty?” He shouts over the music, and it takes every fiber of your being to not gag at the smell of beer coming from him. You eye the way his tie is now secured on his head like a bandana, and you offer him a tight lipped smile.

“I’m good, thanks,” You call out, shooting him a thumbs up and he nods, stumbling over to the table of new pledges and forcing them to take shots with him.

Against your own will, your eyes search the crowd for a certain dimpled boy, and you find yourself frowning slightly when you can’t see him. You feel a hand on your shoulder and you turn to see Jaehyun looking down at you with a small crease forming between his brows.

“Why was Johnny talking to you?” He leans down to speak over the music, and you start to wonder if the champagne is the reason you find the proximity dizzying.

“He asked if I wanted another drink. I said no,” You answer.

Jaehyun looks at you for a moment, as if considering something, before he leans closer to your ear and speaks.

“Let’s step outside for a second.”

You never agree to something quicker, standing to your feet and letting Jaehyun guide you out to the lobby and up a flight of marble stairs. His hand rests too comfortably on the small of your back, and you ignore the way his touch feels like fire on your skin.

Maybe you were a lightweight after all and maybe the effects of the champagne were starting to take place, making you more perceptive to the way he stayed close to you as you passed by groups of people.

He leads you to an empty room upstairs, walking towards the large glass doors at the end and sliding them open. You step out onto the terrace, your eyes taking in the view of the field below, decorated with fairy lights and flowers for the banquet. Jaehyun shuts the door behind him, walking up to stand next to you as you look up at the inky sky.

“Woah, you can see the stars so well. They’re so pretty,” You breathe out.

Jaehyun’s eyes study your features that are dimly light by the glow of the fairy lights, and he mumbles quietly to himself, “Very pretty.”

A light breeze creeps its way over your form and you shiver, crossing your arms over your chest to try to garner a little warmth.

Jaehyun doesn’t miss the way you cower slightly as the temperature drops, his arms moving quickly to take his blazer off and drape it over your shoulders.

“Oh, I’m good,” You protest, starting to slide the jacket off your shoulders but stopping when Jaehyun puts two hands on your shoulders to readjust the jacket.

“Keep it on. I don’t wanna hear your ass complaining when you get sick and can’t sing at the showcase,” He mumbles, the glint of fondness in his eyes going unnoticed as you grumble under your breath that you’re fine but slipping your arms through the jacket nonetheless.

“Even if I get sick, I’d still sing better than you any day,” You joke, a small smile making its way onto your face upon seeing Jaehyun’s dimples slowly deepen.

“Y/N, Y/N, Y/N. My biggest hater yet you still agreed to be my date for tonight,” He tuts.

Despite the cool air nipping at your nose, you could still feel the warmth spread on your cheeks at his words.

“I am not your date…I’m your plus one,” You articulate, hesitating before you finally ask what had been on your mind all night, “Why did you ask me to go anyways? I know you had other options.”

Jaehyun ponders for a moment, his lips drawing into a line before he lets out a breath.

“I guess I did have other options. None of them were my first choice though.”

You’re thankful that the sky was dark enough to hide the stupid blush that blooms on your cheeks at his words. “And I was your first choice because…?”

“You’re kidding, right?” He snorts, looking up at the sky with a sigh, “Senior year field day.”

Your eyes almost bulge out of your head as those words leave his lips, and you whip your head to the side to look at him.

“W-what about it?” You stammer embarrassingly, your heartbeat quickening as you wait for him to answer you.

“We were supposed to be each others first kiss and you didn’t show up. I can’t say I wasn’t bummed, you know,” He’s still looking out at the sky as he speaks, and you hate that even in a situation like this, you couldn’t help but admire the way the moon dances over his features.

“I did show up and you were kissing Soojin. So I wouldn’t have even been your first kiss,” You mumble, and you hate the way you almost sound disappointed.

He lets out a dry laugh. “Yeah, I can’t blame you for leaving. But, just for the record, she stole it from me. I wanted it to be you.”

You didn’t think it was possible for your eyes to widen any more than they already were, your lips parting in surprise as you try to process what he just said.

“She…stole it?” You repeat his words and he nods slowly, choosing to ignore the part where he said he wanted you to be his first kiss for the sake of your own sanity.

“I guess she heard us talking about it or something. She followed me to the vending machines and just kinda…threw herself onto me,” He admits, rubbing the back of his neck sheepishly.

Not only did Jaehyun just completely deconstruct the reason behind your hatred for him, but he did so while also admitting that he wanted you to be his first kiss. An unfamiliar feeling bubbles in your stomach and you rack your brain for something to say.

“Well that…sucks,” You wince at your own words, mentally smacking yourself in the head for not being able to think of anything else. A little sigh of relief escapes your lips when Jaehyun laughs.

“It did suck. I wanted it to be you,” He repeats his words from earlier and he turns to you, looking at you with sincerity written all over his sharp features.

You come to the conclusion that you’re definitely in way over your head right now. You blame the champagne, no, you blame the way the cologne on Jaehyun’s blazer completely clouds your senses.

“Why’s that?” You say quietly, your eyes locked onto his intently.

“Why do you think?” He says calmly, turning to face his entire body towards you before stepping closer.

The tension between you two is enough to suffocate you, and you blame that for your lack of rationality and judgement as you let him enter your space, your eyes never leaving his as he towers over you even in your heels.

“Jaehyun…” You mumble, not sure if it was an attempt to stop him or a cue for him to close the space between you two.

“I’ve really, really wanted to make up for that kiss. Can I?” He speaks quietly, his eyes searching yours for permission.

You’ve definitely had too much champagne tonight, and that’s why you end up nodding.

His hand hesitantly comes up to gently cradle your jaw, your eyes never leaving his as your heart pounds excessively in your chest. He inches closer, his lips barely brushing against yours before a loud bang in the distance causes you to jump away from him. You turn your head towards the field where Yangyang lights up a row of boxes, and you watch as sparks of red and white shoot into the night sky. Not even a second later, you hear a chorus of laughter from the room behind you and the glass doors slide open. Johnny and Yuta come stumbling onto the terrace with three other guys you don’t recognize, and they smile drunkenly at you before whooping at the next round of fireworks.

“Holy shit, we have the best view in the house!” Johnny slurs, whipping out his phone and recording the fireworks as the other boys clink their beer bottles together.

You’re suddenly very aware of the fact that you almost kissed Jaehyun just now, and you let out a small gasp. You look over at Jaehyun, who watches his friends with a scowl, and you quickly slip his blazer off of your shoulders and shove it in his arms, the smell of his cologne lingering on you far longer than you appreciated.

“I’m…I,” You can barely get your words out, so you resort to pointing your thumb at the glass doors behind you to signify you’re leaving. You turn to walk back into the venue but his hand gently wraps around your wrist, and you look back at him.

“Wait, let me take you home,” He nearly pleads, but you simply shake your head and pull your arm out of his grasp. He tries to speak again but Johnny wraps an arm around his shoulder and tugs him into a group selfie.

Your mind is a whirlwind of thoughts as you make your way back into the venue, your cheeks hot as you weave through the crowds of people that litter the space. You quickly pull your phone out when you reach the front, ordering yourself an Uber and sitting on the curb as you try to process what just happened. The single glass of champagne you had was slowly starting to wear off, and you’re left with no excuses for the way your heart still hasn’t stopped hammering in your chest even after you’ve left Jaehyun’s vicinity.

You’re almost certain you look insane right now, sitting on the sidewalk with your head in your hands as you mumble “I’m fucked” over and over again under your breath. A car horn causes you to jump in your spot, and you look up to see what you could only assume to be your Uber. You get in, confirming your address with the driver before he begins to pull away from the curb, and you lean back in your seat with a huff.

“Rough night?” The driver chirps, and you let out a dry laugh, the fog in your brain beginning to lift and leaving you feeling slightly disappointed and confused.

“Something like that.”

*･゜ﾟ･*:.｡..｡.:*･'♪(๑ᴖ◡ᴖ๑)♪'･*:.｡. .｡.:*･゜ﾟ･*

we’re collecting dust

but our loves enough

There’s a noticeably thick tension between you and Jaehyun the next day at rehearsals.

You’re well aware that his eyes had been laser-focused on you from the minute you walked into the auditorium and it left you with an unsettling pit in your stomach as you tried to engage in conversations with your friends to distract yourself from the boy shamelessly staring at you.

“Is it just me or is Jaehyun staring at you?” Renjun asks from the seat behind you.

Mark and Donghyuck snap their necks towards the boy in question, their eyes following his gaze to confirm Renjun’s statement, only to have it land on you.

“Come on now, why would he stare at me?” You smile sheepishly to feign innocence. Donghyuck gasps loudly and jumps out of his seat, causing the surrounding students to avert their attention towards him.

“Is this about last nigh-”

You clap a hand over his mouth and force him back into his seat before he can finish his sentence. His eyes are about to pop out of his head as you offer an apologetic smile to the students who glare at your group.

“What the hell is wrong with you?! Do you want the entire school to know my business?” You whisper-shout as you remove your hand from his mouth.

“Holy shit, I need to know what happened, start to finish. Better yet, I need a play-by-play of what happened from the moment you left the house,” He rambles, bouncing in his seat excitedly.

“Mark, make him stop,” You groan, rubbing at your temples.

“I would love to, but I’m also curious,” Mark winces when you shoot a glare in his direction.

You sigh. It would definitely make the load on your shoulders feel lighter if you vent about last night’s events to your friends. You barely get the chance to open your mouth before Professor Kim walks into the auditorium.

“Hello, students! Give me ten seconds to get the speakers and mics on and we’ll be up and running!” He chirps as he sets his clipboard down and walks onto the stage to set up.

“I’ll tell you guys after rehearsals. My place, tonight,” You whisper to the three boys before you all turn towards the stage.

Professor Kim stands on the stage with a happy grin, eyes scanning the students in the audience before he looks down at his clipboard.

“Today we’re going to try to do rehearsals with the curtains and lights. First pair up is Y/N and Jaehyun!”

It was your turn for your eyes to bulge out of your head. You look over to your partner, only to quickly look away when you realize his eyes are already focused on you, a taunting smirk adorning his stupid face.

“Come on up, guys” Professor Kim calls out.

You hesitantly stand up, looking back at your friends who give you reassuring nods. You trudge through the backstage doors and up the steps, walking onto the stage and positioning yourself at one of the mic stands. In your peripheral, you see Jaehyun only a few steps behind you, doing the same as the curtains close.

“I need to talk to you, you know,” You can feel the way his eyes bore into the side of your face as he speaks, and you sigh.

“Let’s just get this over with.”

The opening chords of the song starts playing and the curtains open, the stage lights shining directly onto you and Jaehyun. You start off the song, easily moving through the first verse and chorus. When Jaehyun’s verse starts, you tense up, doing your best to remember Professor Kim’s notes from your past few rehearsals. You watch as Jaehyun sings his lines while looking directly at you, your eyes getting lost in his as you both start singing together. The bridge approaches quickly and before you even realize it, you’re both standing in front of each other, the lyrics feeling more like a conversation between you two than the words to a song.

This is a performance. You’re both putting on an act.

You try to repeat those words to yourself mentally, but it all goes out the window when his hand reaches out to gently graze your cheek. Your eyes try to search his and for a second, you swear they’re filled with nothing but longing.

The last note of the song echoes throughout the auditorium and you’re both staring at each other. Something is definitely different, but you can’t quite put your finger on what. You feel something bubbling in your chest and your stomach, and if you weren’t so lost in the way his lips curl up into a smile, you’d be able to figure out what it was.

The stage lights dim and there's scattered applause coming from the other performers and the crew. You snap back into reality and look into the audience where you see your best friends looking at you with a knowing smile. You put the mic back onto its stand and rush backstage, where you sit down on a crate and collect your breath.

“Hey, that was great,” Jaehyun pants, slowly approaching where you’re sitting.

“Right, yeah.”

“I told you I’d make a great partner,” he jokes and you shake your head.

“Yeah, whatever. I can’t wait until this is over with,” you mumble to yourself, but he doesn’t miss it.

“You hate me that much, huh?“

“Why are you acting surprised?”

You finally look up at him and if it wasn’t so dark backstage, you’d be able to see the smirk on his features.

“Cause the way you look at me on stage says different.”

The look on his face is enough to send shivers down your spine, but you’re so lost in his aura that you still can’t distinguish what it is. You need to snap back to reality soon, otherwise you’ll lose complete control of the reigns you have on your feelings. The sound of the backstage door opening causes you to shift your attention to Mark and Donghyuck, who come rushing in with the biggest shit-eating grins you’ve ever seen. You’re suddenly very aware that your two best friends were watching it all happen, and you stand up abruptly.

“It’s called having stage personality and presence. Maybe you should try it sometime.”

You don’t even give yourself time to process the change in his face before you walk off, grabbing Mark and Hyuck along with you.

When you reach the audience, you collapse into a seat, and Hyuck is the first one to break the silence after a series of knowing stares between him and Mark. “So…you hate him, huh?”

“Hyuck,” you whine.

“Innocent question, Y/N.”

You pinch the bridge of your nose and gesture for them to sit next to you. They’re now on either side of you, waiting for you to speak.

“I feel insane,” you almost laugh, but nothing was particularly funny in this situation. You just feel like you need to laugh to lighten the heavy feeling on your chest.

“Because you might not actually hate him?” Mark inquires, and you shake your head.

“Because I don’t think I ever really did.”

Your friends send you sympathetic glances, Hyucks eyes darting towards the doors that lead backstage when it squeaks open. He watches Jaehyun walk out seemingly disheveled, before he makes a beeline for the auditorium exit to avoid the stares of the other students. “Is it so bad to be wrong about someone?”

You sigh and rub your eyes. There were too many thoughts swirling around your head and it made you dizzy.

“Can we step outside?” You ask them and they stand, leading you towards the back of the auditorium. Mark pushes the door open but barely takes a step out before he freezes in his spot with Donghyuck doing the same, causing you to bump into their backs.

“Oh shit.”

You look up upon hearing those words leave Mark's mouth, and your blood runs cold.

Jaehyun was leaning against the corridor wall, Kang Soojin latching onto him like the bloodsucking leech she is. And just like that, you’re back in highschool watching Soojin kiss Jaehyun in front of the vending machines again.

You don’t know what it was about the sight but you felt sick to your stomach, your breathing becoming shallow and your hands shaking.

“Woah, Y/N, you okay?” You hear Mark ask, but your heartbeat is so loud in your ears that he sounds far away.

Your eyes finally break away from the sight and you stomp forward, walking through the corridor without another word. You keep up your speed until you’re sure you're far enough from the devil himself, and you turn the corner of the hallway.

“Y/N! Wait up!” You hear your friends call after you.

You slide down the wall and sit on the floor, tears sliding down your cheeks even though you’re not exactly sure why.

You thought you hated Jaehyun. You thought you’ve hated him ever since highschool. But why did the sight of him and Soojin make your chest ache? Why was it so easy for him to make your resolve crumble? Why couldn’t you get him out of your head?

“Jesus Christ, are you okay?” Mark pants, crouching down to examine your crying figure. The tears wouldn’t stop coming no matter how hard you tried to control it.

“Bub…” Hyuck sits down next to you and wraps an arm around your shoulder. You lean into him and you let the tears fall silently this time.

It’s silent as Donghyuck holds you close and Mark sits in front of you and strokes your hand. You didn’t know what to say, but you knew you didn’t have to explain anything to them just yet. You let them comfort you in silence, not worrying about the dread that came with knowing you’d have to talk about it at some point.

“Let’s go home.”

*･゜ﾟ･*:.｡..｡.:*･'♪(๑ᴖ◡ᴖ๑)♪'･*:.｡. .｡.:*･゜ﾟ･*

we’re not broken just bent,

and we can learn to love again

You skip the next two rehearsals despite every bone in your body fighting to be on the stage. You make up a lie about being sick to Professor Kim, and Mark and Donghyuck cover for you.

It wasn’t an entire lie. You definitely felt a churning in your stomach since the incident and it made you nauseous. Your phone had been on silent for two days, and your hand had been itching to pick it up and see if Jaehyun had texted you.

The clock blinks 2:14 AM as you shuffle back into your room after using the bathroom. You pull back your comforter and slip into bed with a long sigh, curling yourself into the same position you had been in for the past two days and letting your eyes flutter shut.

Your phone vibrates from your nightstand and you ignore it, assuming it’s either Mark or Donghyuck calling to check up on you. The vibrating stops and your room fills with silence for a brief moment before your phone rings again.

You reach behind you with your eyes still closed, swiping across the screen to accept the call before bringing it up to your ear.

“I’m alive, boys. I appreciate your concern but it is 2 AM,” You croak into the phone, your voice barely above a whisper.

“Not boys, just boy. And if I knew all I needed to do to talk to you was call you, I would have done it a lot sooner.”

Your eyes shoot open and you damn near jump out of bed.

“Jaehyun?” Your voice cracks. “Why are you calling me at two o’clock in the morning?”

“You’re gonna ask me that when you’ve been MIA for the past two days?” He scoffs into the receiver.

“If Professor Kim told you to check up on me, I’m fine. Are we done here?” Your voice is shaky as you try to maintain your usual cold demeanor towards him.

“God damn it, Y/N,” He snaps. “I’m calling you because I want to. Because I care. You can’t disappear for two days and not respond to my texts then expect me to not give a shit. Cut the fucking attitude.”

A tense silence envelopes the call as you fiddle with the drawstrings of your pajama shorts. All traces of fatigue have left your body upon hearing Jaehyun’s voice, making you sigh deeply as you lean against your headboard.

“I’m fine, Jaehyun,” You chew at your bottom lip in an attempt to keep the lump in your throat at bay.

“Stop saying that when both you and I know it’s not true.”

That was the final push that sent your last bits of sanity off the edge.

“What do you want from me, Jaehyun? Do you want me to sit here and cry to you about how shitty I feel right now? Do you want me to tell you that I wish I didn’t have to go back to rehearsals because I have barely been able to get out of bed for the past two days?” You cry.

It’s silent again, embarrassment slowly seeping into your veins as you wipe the streaks of tears from your cheeks.

“Do you want me to tell Professor Kim to excuse you from the performance? I can do it solo,” His voice is surprisingly gentle.

You stare ahead at your black TV screen as you think about Jaehyun’s words. Performing at the spring showcase has always been one of your favourite times of the year, and you knew that if you didn’t perform this year you wouldn’t be able to live with yourself. Especially knowing that it meant you’d have to admit that the reason behind your dejection was Jaehyun.

“No, I can…I can come back tomorrow,” Your voice is uneasy.

“Tomorrow’s Saturday, sweetheart,” He laughs.

You hate the way the pet name makes your heart clench.

“Right, then Monday. I’ll be back on Monday,” You sputter, smacking your palm to your forehead in an attempt to regain composure. You feel another surge of embarrassment when you hear him laughing again. “If that’s it, I’m gonna go to bed, Jaehyun.”

“Wait!” He calls out, and you hum curiously at his urgency.

“I know you didn’t ask but, there’s nothing going on with me and Soojin. She was on me. You guys really just came out at a bad time,” He breathes out and you feel heat rushing to your cheeks at the thought that he knew you were bothered by him and Soojin.

“I-the-um-that doesn’t matter to me,” You attempt to lie, the shaking in your voice not only apparent to you but to Jaehyun as well, who laughs at your failed efforts. You smack your palm to your head again at the embarrassment that has yet to leave your body since the call started.

“That’s a shame. I was told it did,” You hear the traces of a smile in his voice and you pale.

“Who told you what?” You squeak.

“Let’s just say one of them is a really bad liar and the other one is a chronic yapper. I’m sure you can figure it out from there,” He laughs into the receiver and you curse under your breath.

“Those idiots,” You grumble.

“If it makes you feel any better, I’m glad it does matter to you,” He speaks, the blush returning to your cheeks as you continue to stutter embarrassingly into the phone.

“I said it doesn’t,” You muster, not even believing your own words.

“Whatever you say, sweetheart. Get some rest, yeah? I need my partner in tip top shape on Monday,” He chirps.

“Yeah, I will. Thanks for checking in, Jaehyun. I appreciate it,” Your lips slowly spread into a smile and he hums.

“Oh, and Y/N?”

“Yeah?”

“I don’t care if you don’t reply to anybody else’s calls or texts. But don’t pull that shit with me or I swear to God I’ll show up to your house next time.”

You let out a giggle at his request, nodding to yourself and not missing the way he sighs, almost contently, into the phone. You hate to admit it, but this was the best you’ve felt in the past few days.

“Goodnight, Jaehyun,” You laugh quietly.

“You should laugh more often, Y/N. Sweet dreams,” He voices before you hear the noise that signals he hung up.

You return your phone to its place on your nightstand before falling back onto your pillows.

“What the fuck?” You whisper to yourself, clapping a hand over your mouth after a girlish giggle slips past your lips.

That night, you fall asleep peacefully with an undeniable smile etched onto your features, as soft brown eyes and deep dimples occupy your dreams. When you wake up in the morning you swear the sun shines a little brighter, and you go about your morning with ease and a small smile.

Getting back to rehearsals feels easy and you quickly fall back into routine, your performance with Jaehyun getting stronger as the day of the show approaches. Neither of you bring up what happened, and quite frankly you couldn’t be more glad that he seemingly swept it under the rug for your sake. The idea of having that complicated conversation nearly made you retch every time you thought about it, so you continually prayed that he would forget about it as time passes.

But unfortunately for you, the universe doesn’t seem to hear your prayers.

It’s the Thursday night before the performance and you’re the last one to pack up and leave the auditorium after a long day of rehearsal. You sling your bag over your shoulder with a sigh, fishing your phone out of your pocket to check the time and frowning when you see it was almost 8pm. The loud squeak of the auditorium door startles you, and you look up to see Jaehyun sauntering down the aisle towards you.

“Why are you still here? You scared the shit out of me,” You call out, a hand on your chest to stop the racing of your heart.

“I was waiting for you. Mark and Donghyuck left, and I wasn’t going to leave you alone,” He shrugs, stopping to stand in front of you.

Shit. Was he finally going to talk to you about what happened the other week?

“Why were you waiting for me?” Your eyes flit nervously around the room.

He lets out a soft chuckle, lowering himself to meet your eyes, “Did you think I forgot?”

“Forgot what?” You stammer, stepping back to allow for some distance between you two.

“That I know you were bothered by me and Soojin. That we almost kissed at the banquet.”

You realized with an alarming clarity that you were very much fucked, and there was no way you could back out of this conversation now. Your reactions were too obvious, your emotions too readable, and you let out a defeated sigh.

“It was the alcohol talking at the banquet. I wasn’t in my right mind,” You deflect, flinching slightly when he laughs at your weak attempt to dissmiss him.

“Okay, let’s say you were. You weren’t drunk when you saw me and Soojin though,” He mentions.

“So?” You try to keep a stoic demeanor but it’s quickly replaced by surprise when he steps closer.

“Why were you bothered by it, Y/N?” He prods, tilting his head as he notes the way your eyes fail to meet his.

“Wouldn’t you be bothered by two people practically making out in front of you?” You scoff weakly.

He hums thoughtfully, before shaking his head, “Not really. Not unless I liked the person.”

“T-that’s not true,” You try to argue, but you know it’s no use. He’s got you right where he wants you, and just the tiniest push would send you over the edge.

“Be honest with yourself, Y/N. It won’t help either of us if you keep lying like this,” He almost growls as he steps forward to trap you against the foot of the stage.

“Why do you care?” You furrow your brows at him.

“Because I like you, god damn it. I liked you in highschool and I like you now.”

A strange feeling churns in your stomach at his words and you almost laugh. The idea of Jaehyun liking you made you feel strange, insecurity and disbelief pricking at your heart as you open and close your mouth pathetically.

“N-no, you don’t,” You dismiss, looking away from him as if it would change the tension between you two right now.

“Yes, I do. I like that you’re not afraid to speak up against people you don’t like and I like that I can tell what mood you’re in just by looking at your face. I like that you’re always humming even though I tell you it’s annoying and I like that you don’t let me tell you what to do. I like that you’re bothered by the idea of me and Soojin together, because I like you,” Jaehyun lets out all in one breath and you try to search his features for anything that isn’t the complete sincerity that was written all over it.

“You don’t like me, Jaehyun,” Your voice is barely above a whisper as you shake your head.

“Don’t tell me how I feel. I like you, Y/N. Too damn much for you to try to convince me I don’t,” His voice softens as he lowers his head to try to meet your eyes, a frown forming on his lips when you turn your head to look away from him.

“B-but Soojin…you like Soojin,” You can feel your heartbeat in your throat as you try to dismiss his feelings for you, not wanting to face the reality of your own just yet.

“I don’t care about, Soojin. I never have. I don’t even look in her direction because I’m too busy looking at you.”

It becomes increasingly difficult to convince yourself that he didn’t actually like you. You feel sick, the butterflies that only seemed to erupt when he was around begin swirling violently in your stomach. Your heart beats wildly in your chest as you look up at him and your brain works in overdrive to justify the way he’s looking at you, like you were an oasis in the middle of a barren desert. The line between hatred and something that was definitely not that was completely gone, and this time you can’t blame the alcohol or the tension for the way your heart nearly bursts when he gently tilts your head to look at him.

“Jaehyun…” You call out weakly, not missing the way his eyes are almost begging you to believe him.

“I like you, dumbass. So much,” His voice is barely a whisper as he searches your face for any type of emotion.

You’re not drunk, you’re not vulnerable, and you definitely can’t ignore it anymore. The pounding of your heart in your chest is loud, urgent, and the butterflies that clutter your stomach demand your attention. The startling realization that Jaehyun was the only person who could evoke such a visceral physical reaction from you washes over you, and everything becomes clear to you as your eyes meet his.

You like Jaehyun, and you probably have for a long time.

“Oh shit,” You mutter to yourself, looking at him with a newfound sense of clarity.

“What is it?” Jaehyuns brows crease slightly at your words.

“I like you too,” You breathe out, the ghost of a smile on your lips as you look up at him with a glint of adoration in your eyes.

Jaehyun lets out a breath, his eyes fluttering shut for a moment as his body relaxes in relief.

“Thank fucking God.”

Without another thought, he tilts your head up and presses his lips against yours, his free hand securing itself on your waist as he tugs you closer. He holds you with the utmost conviction that you’d disappear from his very sight if he let go, his desperate hands holding you impossibly closer as your lips mold with his.

Your heart nearly bursts at the seams as you run your hands up his arms and past his shoulders, stopping to gently cup his face. You kiss him back with equal fervor, your body buzzing with what you could only describe as pure bliss. When your lungs begin to burn from the lack of oxygen, you both pull away, your chests heaving and cheeks tinted a bright pink as you both catch your breath.

“So you were pretending to hate me this whole time, huh?” Jaehyun pants, his hand sliding down to squeeze your hip.

You swat at his chest, your lips twitching into a small smile, “Shut up, before I take it back.”

His hands rest comfortably on your hips, as if they were meant to be there all this time, and he pulls you into his arms. “Nope, can’t take it back. You’re stuck with me.”

You laugh against his chest, wrapping your own arms around his torso as you rest your cheek against his chest. He sways you back and forth gently, a comfortable silence dawning on you two for a moment.

“So…now what?” You speak up, pulling away from the hug to look at him.

He considers you question for a moment as he looks at you, his adoration never fleeting as he tucks some hair behind your ear. “I’d really like if you were mine. How does that sound?”

You hum in mock thought, but the quckening of your heart and the unrelenting butterflies in your stomach know the answer to his question.

“I think I’d like it if you were mine too,” Your grin widens when you notice the way his eyes light up at your response.

“I was always yours, dumbass,” His dimples deepen as he lets out a laugh.

You hear what sounds like a wail coming from backstage, and you whip your head around in slight fear.

“Is someone back there? I can hear you,” You call out, your arms loosening around Jaehyun.

Donghyuck and Mark emerge from behind the curtains, sheepish grins on their faces as they wave at the both of you. You instinctively release your hold on Jaehyun, your face reddening as you realize that your best friends just witnessed everything.

“Are you guys stalkers or something? Why were you hiding back there?” You question as you cross your arms over your chest.

“I’m sorry, bub, but we couldn’t miss this. It was your boyfriends idea!” Donghyuck snitches, pointing an accusing finger at the boy next to you. You turn your head towards Jaehyun and raise an eyebrow at him.

“My fault?! I asked for your help, not for you to stalk us!” Jaehyun retorts.

“Same difference! What did you think we were going to do-” Hyuck defends himself, his words being cut short as Mark smacks him on the back of the head.

“If you were quieter, they wouldn’t have found out! You just had to start crying like a loser!” Mark points out.

“They were being so cute, I had to! I told you we could have played it off!” Hyuck sputters.

You shake your head as they both begin bickering in front of you, and you feel Jaehyun wrap a secure arm around your waist from behind you.

“Your boyfriend, hm? I could get used to that,” He speaks low enough so that only you could hear him.

You turn your head to look up at him and you’re tempted to deny the reality of the situation again, but the feeling of his thumb gently tracing shapes on your skin pushes any sense of insecurity you had out of the way. There was nothing to deny anymore, and you mentally confirm this when he gazes down at you, his eyes warm and reassuring.

“I could too.”

*･゜ﾟ･*:.｡..｡.:*･'♪(๑ᴖ◡ᴖ๑)♪'･*:.｡. .｡.:*･゜ﾟ･*

NOTES: she’s finished!!! thank you so much for reading if you’ve made it this far<33 i hope you guys love this one as much as i loved writing it :))) more work coming soon my pretties💞💞💞💞

[athenamikaelson]

Complaints and Harriet Styles Pt. 2

Klaus Mikaelson x reader

Warnings- strong language, innuendos, mentions of blood and death.

Word count- 2.5k 

 “Would it make me a bad person if I said he was hot?’ I asked Caroline as I sat in front of her vanity mirror as she curled my hair.  

“Y/n,” Caroline frowned at me as she looked at me through the mirror, “he either killed or is trying to kill our friends. He’s a bad guy, so don’t even think about it.” 

“I’m not saying I want to bang the guy or anything,” As I say that the the thought crosses my mind and it’s clear Caroline knows that as well as her frown deepens, “Care don’t get your Barbie hair in a twist. Even though his accent is dreamy and his blue eyes make my knees shake. I’m not going to try anything, obviously.” I say mockingly as Caroline watches me as if she’s somehow aged 100 years since our conversation began. Which you know isn’t possible because she’s literally immortal. 

“Sometimes I don’t know what to do with you. You’re either arguing with someone or hitting on them. Or even both!” She says as she throws her hands up in emphasis, the curler unplugging itself during her action. 

We both sit there in silence for a moment looking at the curler’s wire. I look up at her with a sly smile, “Does this mean we’re finally done? My ass hurts from sitting here and being your personal doll.” Caroline puts her hand on her hip with a displeased look on her face. 

“I haven’t finished curling the other half of your head, so turn around and shut it. And didn’t you just say I was the Barbie doll?” She says matter-of-factly as she replugs in the curler and waits for it to heat back up. 

“Ok well you are a Barbie doll, I’m more like that doll that Angelica had in Rugrats, y’know the one with fucked up hair and looks like she just got thrown into a blender.” I laugh at my own joke as Caroline rolls her eyes, a smile trying to make its way onto her face. 

I glance at my dark eyeshadow that makes my y/e/c eyes bright. 

“Why do I even have to go to this stupid dance, our school has like 14 a year. How does our town even have the budget for that? And why do we have to do weird decade dances?” 

“Y/N you’re going to homecoming, end of story. It’s our senior year. This past year has been so crazy that we deserve a little normalcy.” She says as she finishes my last section of hair. 

“Normalcy? You do realize that every dance we’ve had since last year has ended with someone dead or impaled right? It isn’t a Mystic Falls high school dance if it doesn’t end in blood!” Caroline just watches me in annoyance as she sprays my hair with hairspray, “accidentally” spraying some into my face.

“Bitch!” I cough out.

“Go get dressed!” She uses her strength to lift me up and push me over to her closet where my y/f/c dress is hanging.

I look over my shoulder, “I hate you.” 

Caroline smiles, “Love you too brat.”

-------------

I listen to the live band as I sip on the disgusting drink in my hand. Caroline who was supposed to chaperone tonight left me to go yell at Tyler for his wolfy crush or whatever on Klaus. I’m seriously debating on just walking myself home, since Caroline was my ride, as I watch on in disgust as teenagers grind against each other to the fast song the band is playing in the backyard of Tyler’s house. Somehow Tyler was able to put together a huge party since the gym was flooded last minute. Caroline didn’t seem suspicious but I on the other hand always think the worst is going to happen at any time, and with my friend group's history with dances I wouldn’t be surprised if something was going to go down tonight. I'm about to grab my bag and leave before shit goes down when I hear a British accent come from behind me. 

“Welcome everyone tonight,” I turn around, and low and behold that British fuck from Senior prank night is standing up on the stage in front of all of us, yapping about something. 

“This is a long time coming,” He says as he watches someone from the crowd with a smirk on his face. I follow his eye line to see Stefan staring back at him. Yikes. I look back to the Brit but find his eyes staring in my direction. I don’t think he’s looking at me until I send a look of disgust at him which makes the smirk on his face deepen. Fuck me. Wait. No. I quickly turn around and start to make my way to the edge of the party hoping to make my escape before I get sucked into whatever bullshit the Scooby gang is going to try to drag me into. I smile to myself as I’m about to be successful in my escape as my vision is blocked by something. Said something bumps me backwards throwing me off balance and I wait to hit the ground as I start falling, but nothing comes. I look up to see Klaus grabbing ahold of the top of my arm, keeping me from falling down.  

“What a fucking cliche,” I say to myself angrily. Klaus looks at me inquisitively. 

“What’s a cliche?” He asks me with that stupidly hot accent as I rip my arm away from his hold and put another foot's distance between us.

“You catching me,” I tell him but he only looks confused, “Y’know in romcoms when the girl trips and falls but doesn’t actually fall because the random hot main guy catches her. It’s a big fucking cliche.” I say huffing as Klaus watches me with that stupid fucking smirk on his face.

“And I’m the main hot guy?” He asks, clearly trying to get me to go along with his current ego trip.

“No, you’re not. Ryan Gosling is the hot main guy or Paul Rudd,” I let out a satisfactory sigh at Paul Rudd, “You’re more of the evil boos villain in video games.” 

“And what’s so wrong with being the villain?” He asks me as he takes a step towards me. 

I look at him with what I can only guess looks like a “are you fucking kidding me” look. 

“Literally everything. That’s literally the whole point of being the villain.” I put my hand out stopping him from stepping closer. Klaus watches me closely for a second too long. His gaze makes me quite uncomfortable because I can’t tell if he wants to kill me for speaking to him like I just did or applaud me for having the balls to. God, sometimes I just need to learn to shut the fuck up. 

“Dance with me.” He states as he puts his hand out waiting for me to give him my hand in return. My gaze goes from his face to his hand multiple times before I shake my head in annoyance. 

“No way dude,” I say as I start to book it back towards the house away from him. I don’t get far though because he’s in front of me again with a determined look on his stupidly hot face. God why does it always have to be the bad guys that are hot? 

“Either you dance with me, or I start killing your friends off one by one. I wonder where that blond friend of yours is, Tyler’s little girlfriend.” He says with a dark glint in his eyes. 

“Why?” I try to hold my ground even though I’m pretty sure I’m about to start pissing myself any second now. 

“Why what?” he asks me as he watches me.

“Why do you want to dance with me? Theirs like 200 other girls here that I’m sure would just jump at the chance to dance with some British guy.”

Klaus just shrugs his shoulder as if he himself doesn’t even have an answer to the question. 

“Because none of them have had the displeasure of catching my eye.” 

“And let me guess, I have?” I ask him. He doesn’t give me an answer though, only reaches out his hand once again waiting for me to take it. Annoyed I slap my hand in his and drag him to the dance floor. Once I push us into the middle of a big group, I turn to him.

“Don’t be pissy if I step on your toes.” Klaus just lets out a huff of a laugh as he drags my body closer to him so my chest is touching his. A shudder goes through my body at the contact and I mentally curse myself for the reaction. Fuck he smells good. Jesus Y/N get a grip, he’s just a guy. A thousand-year-old hot guy, but still just a guy. I look up to find Klaus already staring at me, with a knowing smirk on his face. I just roll my eyes as I try to play it off cool as he sways me to the now slow song.

“So tell me, how did you become friends with my doppelganger and her little group of followers?” A weird feeling of sadness flows through me at his question as I realize he only asked me to dance for information on my friends. 

“We grew up together. Small town like this everyone knows each other, sadly.” I say looking off to the distance and watching the other couples converse lovingly with one another. 

“Why sadly?” He asks me, and for a second I could’ve sworn I heard actual curiosity. I glance back at him and shrug. 

“I just hate this town. I never liked people knowing my business, and everyone here is so complacent with their normal lives. They never question anything or want to know more about anything other than what happens in our weird ass town.” I blush as I realize I just rambled on to a complete psycho about my feelings. But, the look on Klaus’s face isn’t one of annoyance or humor like the other people I’ve vented to usually have on their faces. His face turns from contemplation to understanding. 

“I know what you mean,” He says as he expertly twirls me around, “when I was a boy I grew up in a small village where the wasn’t much chance for prospering. I loved the arts and knew I would never be able to do anything with it. It made me angry. So I can understand your resentment.” He tells me and for a second I forget that he’s the blood-thirsty monster ruining my friend’s lives. 

“You like art?” He looks down at me with a soft smile as if the subject brings out a different side of him. 

“I’ve loved it for over a thousand years. The way emotions can be shown through a canvas and bring out emotion so foreign is unlike anything else I found over a millennium of living,” His eyes trail down to mine, “What do you think?” 

I nod softly in agreement, “I love art. Not really painting because I’m kind of shit at it, but sketching and just looking at art. Although I’m not a fan of this new-age art where someone can splash a canvas with a line of color and sell it for a million dollars. I like art that means something to someone. Art that when you look at it you can feel the emotions that the artist was feeling, every move of the brush stroke made with heart and emotion.” Klaus nods along to my rambling again with a soft look on his face. A look that I can’t quite decipher since it’s on the face of one of the scariest men in the world. 

As the song comes to an end I reluctantly let go of Klaus’s hands. He stares at me for a moment and I think he’s just going to turn around and walk off realizing he didn’t get the information he wanted but then a small laugh escapes his lips and he shakes his head. I watch on in slight confusion wondering if he’s having some kind of stroke or something. 

“You’re not like them you know,” he must notice my confusion because he continues, “like your friends. You’re nothing like them.” I pang of hurt pierces my chest as I turn away and start to walk off, “Well screw you too.” 

“I didn’t mean that as an insult,” He says hastily as he grabs my arm turning me back towards him, “You’re friends they’re small-minded. They think of only themselves and not the world around them, or how amazing it can be.” I go to interrupt him and tell him not to insult my friends but he cuts me off. 

“You need something bigger than this little town. Something that brings you life. When I originally saw you that night in the gym I thought you were just going to be like the rest of them. But you surprised me Y/n, and not many people can say that.” 

I just stare at him in amazement for what seems like forever as I try to piece together everything he just told me. In my stupor though a woman approaches Klaus and whispers something to him which makes his originally light demeanor change to something dark. The woman walks away as Klaus looks at me once more.

“Whenever you decide you want to be a part of something bigger, see something other than this little town I’d be happy to show you. All you need to do is ask.” He tells me as he grabs my hand and places a chaste kiss upon it. I still can't get the balls to say anything as he gives me one last glance before he follows behind the woman. 

What the actual fuck.

-------------

I walked up to my front porch after getting dropped off by Matt because I guess Tyler drugged Caroline with vervain to save her from a pack of mind-controlled hybrids so that’s why she couldn’t bring me home. Sometimes I really hate my friend group. Why can’t for once we deal with normal people's problems like pop quizzes or acne? Like why does not one person in that entire group have a pimple on their skin? That’s the most supernatural thing going on here.

I’m about to open my front door when a small envelope catches my eye at the bottom of my feet. I look over my shoulder and only see Matt as he waits for me to enter my house. I wave to him with the envelope in hand and walk inside my house. I hastily open the envelope and pull out a piece of thick canvas paper. The paper is covered with a beautiful sketch of what appears to be an open field covered in flowers with grazing horses in the distance. Being so engrossed in the sketch I didn't notice the small note on the back. 

“There’s a whole world out there just waiting for you to experience, love. When you’re ready to experience it, I’ll be waiting.” – Klaus

Taglist-

@grac3aph3lion @megmcc2003 @kollover24 @nameunknownsthings

[usagifuyusummer]

"If wings grew from my back right now, I'd say goodbye to the darkness."

Sleepy ramblings below lol.

Damn, Creepy Nuts really knows how to create bangers after bangers. First, Bling-Bang-Bang-Born and now Otonoke??? I'm gonna be dancing to those songs for a while lmao.

Sidenote: I do want to watch Dan Da Dan, but gotta finish the FOP rewatch first lol.

I've noticed that both of these series do have something similar..., like having supernatural creatures such as aliens and ghosts (maybe that's more Danny Phantom lol), the wacky slapstick humor character interactions, and some eldritch horror (in a way)... Hmm, it really does coincide with what I felt about FOP and the Victorian AU I'm collabing with keyintheeye-blog currently lmao.

Although, Dan Da Dan is obviously more mature and raunchy in its humor (as usual with anime). I won't really recommend it to anyone who's not comfortable with sexual jokes or is not used to the kind of storytelling that anime usually has.

Still, I've just felt inspired by how amazing the anime's presentation was so far, mixed with what I'm doing currently, and so, that's how this spawned lol. I do think it needs something more, but I don't know what to add truthfully. Plus, I still can't go snooping around and see the wonderful fanarts the others have created online, so I'll just post these as compensation for being so busy lately. I need to sleep actually, but there's another post I want to do before signing off again. <I'll do that later on this day.> (There's more of my thoughts in the image alt text.)

Besides that, here's a simple sketch of an adult Timmy I did as practice. Have a nice day if you've read this far. (You can tell I'm hella tired lol.)

[nattyluvs]

things you love about bf!skz

pairing: boyfriend!skz x gn!reader

warnings: fluff, drabbles cursing(?), mentions of being a princess

wordcount: 1.3k

bang chan

out of the year or so you two have dated, you haven't failed to notice how observant chan is. even if its something very small thats different about you, he will always point it out.

"there's a bruise on the side of your thigh, what happened?" he would ask, concerningly.

even when you get new clothes, he notices. "are those pants new? they look good on you" he says with a grin on his face. you're starting to believe his brain has yo enter new data everytime theres something different about your appearance.

or the time where you had come back from hanging out with your friends, and the next morning he said "did you get a new piercing? your ear has an extra hole."

chan would point out. this specific scenario ended up with your reply, "channie, how did you even notice...? i took the piercing out already." which thoughtfully, he responded "what can i say, the longer i look at your the more i notice"

lee know

when someone says "dont judge a book by its cover" it definetly applies to people, especially lee know. before getting to know him, he was a completely different person. he cares more than you'd think, almost too much you'd feel like a burden.

like the one time you went out to a private club to celebrate a friend's birthday. you had gotten a little more than tipsy, accidently calling lee know to tell him "how much you miss your boyfriend" and "i need a hug from my boyfriend right now" which gave him the signal to drive his car out to pick you and your friends up, even letting them stay the night at your house.

everytime your mood even changes slightly, he gets worried. even if nothing had even happened to you. he always asks "are you okay love?" and makes sure to take over cooking for that night (and cook very well, mind you) he just wants to make sure you're always happy, because if you're sad, he's sad.

changbin

one thing about changbin is that he's always worried about you. especially for your safety. sometimes it gets a little out of hand, he freaked out when you tripped while you were walking after your date.

you were wearing a new pair of shoes you hadn't gotten used to.

of course, you hadn't fallen to the ground. you kept your balance before you could fall. although, with his quick reflexes he grabbed your waist to pull you back up. (even though you werent going to fall)

changbin being the person he is, proceeded to say, "i know we just went on a date, but dont hurt yourself falling for me sweetheart." you lightly shoved him, annoyed at the cheesy line and embarassed at the petname. to make sure you didnt hurt yourself again, he kept one of his hands on your back, as if he was guiding the way.

hyunjin

no matter how many people are in a room, hyunjin is always looking at you. you first noticed this a little after you had first met. your roomate had invited jisung over, which led to hyunjin coming too. you were all having a conversation at the dinner table, but the only thing you could focus on was the way

hyunjin was looking at you so intensely.

later when you two had eventually starting dating, you had come to discover that was his "im interested in this thing infront of me" face. like how he stared at paintings in an art gallery he found interesting, he stared at you in the same amazement.

another time was after you decided to become a trainee. you and 7 other nee friends were going to perform a cover of one of stray kids' songs. this was a few years after they debuted, and since you two began dating before his debut, obviously he was thrilled when you were on stage covering his song. you could see him in the vip area, embarassingly blowing kisses and hearts at you. he had on a "disguise" but you could tell it was him from a mile away.

han jisung

jisung is overly thoughtful. he likes to express his love for you through words, and tries to do it regularly, as if you're going to forget he loves you. one of the ways he expresses this undying love for you is through sticky notes. specifically, he bought different colors for everyday of the week.

for the days you came back from work late, he left a note on the kitchen counter, usually resulting in seeing him asleep on the couch with the tv playing. you felt bad he tried to stay awake in order to see you when you got home, but his effort was appreciated. the notes usually consisted or something like, "y/n! i hope you had a good day at work, even if you didnt i'm still proud of you. theres food in the fridge for you! - love hannie"

the other way he expressed his love for you was through his music. you went to the studio to suprise him one time, and overheard on a conversation including chan and changbin. they were complaining about how all of the songs han wrote were love songs. you could tell they appreciated it, but an entire album can't be love songs. it was even more embarassing for han when you had accidently heard one of his unreleased songs, a sweet love song, lyrics flowing perfectly with his voice.

felix

one habit felix will never get out of is touching. even before you dated, you could tell he was a skinship person. no matter what, he feels the need to touch you at all times. whether its a hug, holding hands, or even touching your fingers. you don't mind of course. you think its sweet.

he even admitted that theres this feeling of uneasy-ness when he isn't near you. even if you are near eachother, he has the urge to do something in order to be touching you, like a sense of overprotecting.

even doing simple things, like while making dinner, he has to be hugging you from the back. or while you're cutting up some vegatables, he feels the need to guide your hand while you cut, as if it was the first time you picked up a knife. whenever you walk side by side, hands are always entertwined. sitting down at the dinner table? his hand is on your thigh, or ontop of your hand.

seungmin

seungmin thinks about you alot, even if he doesnt admit it to your face. something you've realized is how much attention he pays when you speak, always remembering small things you tell him.

like the time you were on lunch break at work, scrolling through whatever social media app, you sent him a desert recipe you wanted to try sometime. a day or so later, you got home and he had followed tbe recipe in order to make it, even if it wasn't perfect. he wants to make you happy and keep it that way.

or how when he asked to be your boyfriend, he got you and him matching necklaces. because beforehand you had told him about your friend and their boyfriend, and how they got matching bracelets and they were so cure. saying how "you'd love to have a matching item with someone"

jeongin

he loves spoiling you, no matter how much you refuse and try to repay him. he always says "your happiness and love is the only payment i need" with a smile on his face. he was so sweet, but you wanted to make sure he was happy too sometimes.

if you see something through the window of a store you like? hes already at the counter getting ready to pay. It would take 3 hands to count the amount of times he had to fight for the bill, not wanting to make you pay for it. you felt bad not paying for your portion of the meal, no matter how much he reassured you.

he makes sure to give you princess treatment if you're feeling even the slightest bit down. when you had a bad day at work, he immediately out everything else he was supposed to do aside, and planned a relaxing spa evening at home for you. together, you did skincare, massages, and he even let you paint his nails.

likes and reblogs are appreciated!

taglist form

a/n: sorry a few of them are longer than the other ones, thinking of writing a fic based off of one of these tbh...also yes i am stalling for my smau rn u caught me

[leavesfallensparse]

Cigarettes & Wine | M. Healy | 2

'I think I'll put you in another song, a little glimpse of you before you're gone.'

In which Sadie and Matty can't seem to get along at all. They refuse to see eye-to-eye, but Sadie is starting to find Matty's annoyed face a bit too hot. When faced with conversations about feelings, Sadie can't help but want to run away from it all.

warnings: implied alcoholism, implied panic attack (not in a written scene), smut (unprotected sex, oral (f receiving), fingering), lots of arguing, they both just spew shite at each other <3.

word count: 6.7k

authors note: lalalalala sadie matty smut lalalalala. so what it's angry (lowkey heartbreaking) smut, its still smut. i rlly had fun writing this and i am sorry for the angst <3 (not rlly x)

Sadie doesn’t think she’s ever felt anger like she’s feeling right now. The band had just gotten back to their flat after one of their more hectic shows, and George had obviously had the smart idea to go out after said show. Sadie missed out on this night out, feeling like her body was about to collapse inwards, but when the band returned home, loudly, she woke up and immediately seethed. Her anger worsened when she fully woke, she knew what was going on in Matty’s room due to them sharing a wall. Cheap flat means paper thin walls. As each day passes the urge to ask George to switch rooms with her grows.

The pornographic moans and groans paired with the bedframe that is just about banging her bedroom wall down is enough to make Sadie roll out of bed and leave her room with a huff. She almost regrets it when she sees Ross and George basically rolling on the kitchen floor trying to put a frozen pizza in the oven, Adam was standing over the pair just laughing at them. Sadie smirks but then when she hears another bang of Matty’s bedframe come from behind her she mutters a string of angry swear words under her breath. “What does she look like this time?” Is the sentence Sadie uses to make her presence known to the three drunk men in the kitchen.

The boys all look up at her with grimaces on their faces which makes Sadie run a hand down her own, she knows they all want to say “You.” Which makes her reconsider her entire career. She is subjecting herself to something comparable to torture day in, day out. Ever since Sadie had started point blank refusing him sex he was acting crazy, actively seeking out girls who have something in common with her looks wise. She had only started closing herself off because the band was starting to gain traction and she didn’t want anything to end in a messy enough manner for them both to risk their careers. It seemed like a lost cause with the way they were both acting though.

“It’s okay though, we’re having a pizza party.” Ross had somehow manoeuvred from the floor to Sadie’s side, leaning his entire body weight on her. She grunted and moved so the pair of them were leaning on the counter, she looked in his eyes at his extremely slurred words and wondered how he could be this drunk after only being out for two and a half hours. She shook her head with a smirk and snatched the pizza from George, forgetting how much of his weight that Ross was putting on her until he keeled over onto the floor with a giggle.

“Oh my god, Ross.” George pretty much collapses on top of Ross in a fit of drunken giggles and Sadie busies herself with setting the timer on the oven. When she turns around, Adam is stood with his arms open, and she smiles up at him and accepts his invitation for a cuddle. He starts swaying the pair and she can’t help but breathe out a laugh at the song he’s attempting to sing, Sadie has no idea what song he’s actually trying to sing. She tries to pull away when he starts swaying a bit too hard but before she knows it the four of them are on the floor struggling to breathe through their laughs.

When they all sit down on the couch to indulge in their pizza, Sadie hears a door open and close from the hallway. She can’t help the way her eyes roll into her skull, and she suddenly doesn’t want to finish her plate. The way he gets a glass of water, silently, pisses her off beyond belief. He grabs a slice of their pizza and heads back to his room with the water, he notices the silence when he walks in, but he chooses to not make a petty comment. When his bedroom door practically slams shut, Sadie lets out a breath she didn’t know she was even holding in. “George, can I sleep in your room?” He nods with a mouthful of pizza and Sadie heads to her room to grab her water bottle.

Sadie can’t sleep for George’s excessive snoring, he always fucking snores when he’s drunk. She gets up to fill her already empty water bottle with a sigh, a chill comes over her body when she opens the bedroom door, she immediately connects the dots when she sees Matty hanging out the living room window, cig in hand. She sighs and turns her back on him, flipping the tap to cold and turning it on, she hears him clearing his throat behind her and has to stifle the groan trying to escape her lips. “Bored of your girlfriend in there?”

Matty’s chuckle tastes bitter on his tongue, he despises her immaturity sometimes. When he doesn’t reply, she turns to him and when he gestures her over with his head she sighs, she can’t say no to him, and she loathes it. Sitting down next to him she takes his offer of a cigarette, he also forces the glass of wine he’s cradling into her hand, which she happily downs. He looks at her, she looks out the window. “Can’t sleep?”

“George won’t stop fucking snoring.” Matty smiles at that and hands her his lighter. She hands it back and inhales deeply when her cigarette is lit. The silence between them is the calmest silence they’ve sat in for at least three months, anytime the two have been forced in a room alone the tension has been so palpable you could cut it with a knife. Probably due to the fact they’ve not had sex in three months either. She can’t help but study his face, she hasn’t properly taken him in for a while, she tends to avoid him whenever they aren’t shouting at each other’s faces. He looks exhausted, the way his eyes are heavy set into his face and his mouth is nearly permanently in a frown are the telltale signs, this makes her frown. She leans onto his shoulder and lowers her voice to a whisper, “I’m sorry.”

“What? What for?” She shrugs and he wraps an arm around her shoulders, an attempt to protect her from the cold breeze wafting in through the open window. Hesitating slightly, he leans his head against hers, his lips meeting her messy hair before he does so. She sighs and shuffles a bit closer, having sat at a decent distance from him originally. “Nothing to be sorry for, Sades. I’m sorry.”

“Well, what are you sorry for?”

“I’m not sure either.” At his lack of attempt to actually apologise, she hums, nothing has changed. This conversation isn’t progress.

“I should go back to bed.” Sadie feels Matty’s head shake on top of hers and she snickers slightly, raising her head to face him. Their faces are much closer than they were before which makes Sadie’s heart pick up in pace ever so slightly. She pretends that it doesn’t though. He tries to sneak a glance down at her slightly dry lips, but her eager eyes notice, and she instinctively leans in, she swears she does it without realising. Before she knows it his lips are on hers and every argument they’ve had recently has flown out of her head, replaced by the way his hand feels when it falls to her bare thigh, practically coaxing the goosebumps out of her. Matty pulls away first and Sadie shakes her head. “We can’t. Shouldn’t.”

Silencing her with another kiss, a squeeze on her thigh, and his tongue against her lips, Matty groans into her mouth, begging to be let in. She denies him entrance until his other hand tugs lightly at her hair, drawing involuntary moans from her mouth, gaining him entrance. Readjusting so he’s no longer sitting cross legged on the windowsill Matty drags Sadie by the hips on to his lap. She feels so dirty, Matty had gone from being inside the girl in his bedroom two hours ago to making out with Sadie in the living room, but a sick part of her likes knowing that he’ll always come back to her. The same sick part of her grinds down into Matty’s growing erection, revelling in the way his head thumps against the window behind him. “Fuck, Sades.”

“Did that girl not do it for you? She might look like me, but I bet she doesn’t fuck like me, hmm?” Her hands find the seam of her pyjama top, but she quickly feels him swatting her hands away, wanting to take her top off himself. Doing so with fervour, his lips ghosting her nipples, blowing hot air over them and giving her reaction a sick smile. When his mouth closes around her nipple, a low groan ripples through her throat, she feels the need to get his clothes off of him as soon as possible. “Matty, please.”

“You’re filth. Desperate to fuck me when I’ve got a girl waiting for me.” Matty’s words hit Sadie right in her core, writhing on his lap, desperate for friction. The thin material of Matty’s boxers paired with the lacey material of Sadie’s panties was sending her wild, the feeling against her heat is delicious but she’s growing bored of it. He lifts his hips in a frenzy to rid himself of one of two clothing items keeping them apart, at the rapid friction Sadie moans loudly and squeezes her eyes closed. Letting out a dry laugh, Matty shifts her on his lap, her eyes cast down to his length and her hand automatically wrapped around it, like it was muscle memory. “No, need to be inside you. Won’t last long.”

Sadie feels like her lungs are being squeezed with how breathless she is, frantically shuffling her panties down her legs. Takes himself in one hand, Matty lines himself up and grabs one of Sadie’s hands with the other, she squeezes it as he pushes into her, a whine scraping the inside of her throat before tearing out of her mouth. Matty lets go of her hand and sticks two of his fingers into her open mouth, hissing at her, “You’ve got to be quiet, Sades.”

Whining around his fingers, Sadie bucks her hips into his harshly, Matty lets out a sound akin to a growl. She stops and raises an eyebrow at him, brutally shoving two fingers in his mouth. Feeling his mouth forming into a smirk around her fingers at her smug face, he starts fucking up into her to break her mean demeanour. The way her eyes roll into her head spurs him on, his pace relentless, his tongue licking up and down her fingers to match the pace of his savage thrusts. An urge to hear the noises that Matty clearly wants to make takes over Sadie’s brain, so she rips her fingers out of his mouth and sticks it on his knee behind her, leaning back in his lap to feel him hit her deeper inside. “Can fucking feel you squeezing me, so tight, missed this.”

The fake pout takes over her face without her permission, “Really meant it when you said you wouldn’t last long. Pathetic, I’m not even close.” She’s playing it up and he knows it from the way she tenses her thighs and squeezes his knee until her knuckles turn white. But Matty takes her words as the truth, holding himself off from finishing inside her, picking her up and throwing her onto the couch. Moaning at the way he man-handled her, Sadie can feel the loss of him inside her like he’d just ripped her arm from her torso, her blissed out face was quickly replaced by a glare at the two fingers re-entering her mouth, scowling as his hips snapped back into hers. When he leans down to give her neck an open-mouthed kiss, she snaps around his fingers, into his ear. “Fuck you.”

“I am.” The words uttered into her pliable skin make her arch her back into him. She hates the way he knows her body like he worships upon it everyday on the hour, almost as though he had studied her every atom under a microscope in a lab. Lifting one of her legs over his shoulder, she whimpers at the deeper angle, her walls flutter around him and she can feel the stutter of his hips. “Your filthy cunt is fucking sucking me in. You’re like some kind of witch. Come on, give it to me, Sades, fucking hell.” Staring down at the way a string of saliva connects her mouth to his fingers when he pulls them out at a tantalisingly slow pace gives him an idea. “Open your mouth.”

The compliant side of her does so immediately, moaning at the way his spit crawls down her tongue, he nods, she swallows. The wetness of his fingers immediately reaches between her folds and finds her clit, matching the pace of his persistent thrusts. Her left hand scrapes his spine and her right hand rips at his hair. She loathes the way his hands make her fold, feeling her climax take over her entire soul, her eyes squeezing shut at the feeling. “I fucking hate you so much.”

The tone in which she utters this word has him spilling inside her with a pained groan. The pair hold each other tightly as they both hit their peak, Sadie comes down almost immediately from the way Matty rides out his high inside her, she hisses from the overstimulation. “Fucking hell.” His body collapses on top of hers and she whines at the scraping feeling she feels inside. “Pull out, please.” A muttering of a few more swear words from her mouth pulls him from the cloud he’s found himself on, ripping himself from her. The boy inside of him peers down at the sight of his release spilling from her, she groans and steadies herself at the thought of standing up and cleaning herself up.

“Stay here. I’ll be right back.” Her eyes fixate on the torn up skin of his back as he pulls his boxers back on and sneaks into the bathroom. When he emerges, he smirks at Sadie’s sleeping figure on the couch, her deep-set eyes gently fluttering as she gives in, her dark eyelashes resting upon the cheeks. The one word ringing in his mind, beautiful, is giving him a headache. He rubs at her bare thigh in a soft attempt to wake her up, between whispers of different variants of her name. “Just cleaning you up, darling.” She gently whines and rolls over.

“Why are you asleep on the couch?” George is hanging over her like a bad smell, looking down at her with a raised eyebrow, she groans and pushes his face away with a stretch. The sudden memories of the previous night climb into her brain and start to take over, sneaking a glance down, she smirks at the sight of the cushions propped up gently and her clothes on her body. The slight bliss that was beginning to take over her being is interrupted by an unrecognisable, shrill laugh at the kitchen island. George silently communicates at her to keep her mouth shut.

“Morning, Sades! Bacon roll?” At Matty’s chipper tone, George knows all he needs to know, cradling his forehead in his hand. She snorts and sits up, finally getting a look at the girl who was clearly not good enough for Matty. Sadie would describe the girl as ‘nice’, nothing more and nothing less. She looks nice. Matty doesn’t like nice. The other two boys are sat at the kitchen island too, stuffing bacon in their mouths like it’s going to make their hangovers magically disappear. Sadie circles round the couch to stand behind Ross, giving Matty a curt nod before sitting on the last spare seat, right next to this unknown girl.

“I’m Sadie. Who are you?” Adam covers his laugh with a cough, George groans into his hand, Ross is blissfully unaware, and Matty has to stop himself from whipping around to shout at the girl. The poor, innocent girl looks round at Sadie like she’d just shot her dog. A shit eating grin overtakes her mouth, smiling up at Matty as he places a bacon roll in front of her. “Thank you very much! Smells so good!” The tone of her voice makes Adam’s laugh finally escape his mouth, when Miss Unknown turns to him, brows furrowed, he panics.

“Oh, we have fun here.” Sadie opts for taking a bite so none of her laughter sneaks out. What a shit excuse, Adam.

“I’m Daisy, it’s, erm, nice to meet you?” No words. Sadie has no words. Daisy is basically Sadie rearranged. She politely nods at Daisy and turns to face forward in her seat, no longer wanting to interact with anyone. She feels a dull ache in her chest as she watches the way Matty talks to Daisy, a miniscule part of her brain is begging him to look at her. He doesn’t, instead turning back to the pan and humming a merry tune. Sadie is practically snarling at his back, knowing that her very nails have left marks on the hidden skin. That’s all it is. Hidden. Matty clearly has a sudden thought with the way his movements stop.

“Want any sauce, darling?” Sadie doesn’t know what happened, she’ll claim to have blacked out.

“No thanks, Matty.” Her eyes widen. Daisy nearly chokes on her breakfast, poor girl. As if on auto-pilot, Sadie’s feet drag her to her bedroom, completely abandoning her breakfast. She’s sure they all heard the scream she forced into her pillow.

The moon is the only thing lighting up Sadie’s room, the hopeful gleam staring right in her window. The Smashing Pumpkins ‘Oceania’ is humming into her ears as she edits a few photos from the night before, specifically avoiding the ones of Matty. A gentle knock on her door rips her from her daydream, pulling her eyes from the moon she murmurs a “Come in.”, shutting her laptop and turning round in her chair. But the sight of the man she’s avoiding draws a silent groan from her throat, she turns away.

“Hi. Can we talk?” He’s grovelling and she doesn’t know why. When met with silence he keeps talking. “We can’t keep dancing around this, it’s starting to hurt me. I can’t fucking look at you without wanting something from you, anything. I just want a sign of life, Sades.” She stares back out the window, wishing she lived in a house alone on the moon. But no, she’s here, face to face with everything wrong with her. All she knows how to do is shake her head.

“I don’t know what you want from me. I don’t have anything to say to you.” The way he takes a deep breath as he sits down on her bed makes her panic a bit, she knows that he’s about to hurt her feelings. It was just the honest truth, she didn’t have anything to say to him, what words could possibly come out of her mouth that he’d want to hear. Not a single thought in her head is something that should be said out loud to him.

“No, Sadie. What do you want from me? I am fucking sick of you, the sight of you, the way you’ll speak to the boys with no fucking malice in your tone, what did I do to you? And, what? Every two months you want me to fuck you and have it not mean anything? I can’t stand to be in your fucking presence everyday anymore, it’s draining me.” She zones out slightly, trying to will the lump in her throat to go away. Nothing that he had said warrants tears because he is also telling the honest truth.

“We’ve ruined it. Been friends eight years and fucking ruined it.” Shaking her head with a wet laugh she lets it fall to rest on her knee, a single tear slipping out. “Can’t believe there was a time we got on. Now you’re just horrible to me.” Bitter laughter takes over her ears and another tear falls. And another. Lifting her head she writes down the words, ‘wishing you could forget the present you’re living in’, in the notebook on her desk. The notebook is just full of shit, mostly angry shit, recently.

“You’re the horrible one. One day someone snapped their fingers and you turned on me. I can’t fuck around with you anymore, you’ve changed, and it makes me sick. To my stomach. And calling me horrible? Whatever.”

“You’re still talking if you weren’t aware.”

“Yes I was. Wasn’t done either.” Standing up and gesturing wildly, his bitter tongue still talks. She’s reduced to a pile of sobs on her desk chair, just watching, unable to make it stop. “I also find it quite frankly hilarious that you’re the first one to tell people that I’m the ‘worst person you’ve ever met’, it wasn’t that when we were shagging everyday four years ago.” Sadie sniffs a laugh at this, he’s contradicting himself by saying ‘she’s changed’ one second, then referencing a time Sadie actually liked him. “Oh! Another thing, telling George that I’m the only one you don’t say ‘I love you’ to is so strange. I’d like an explanation.” Walking over to her until he’s hanging over her, she has to look up and face his snarl. “Why? Why don’t you love me. I think you do and you’re just fucking scared of me, pathetic, by the way. I think you realised years-”

She interrupts him, unable to control the angry scream ripping from the depths of her lungs. “Stop! Just fucking stop! Get the fuck away from me.” He stills and cocks an eyebrow. “GO.”

A slam of a door and tears coming out in screams is all that’s heard through the flat.

The next time Matty’s on stage doing what he loves, he isn’t sure he actually loves it anymore. He’s considering hiring a new photographer. Sadie’s been dancing round his feet all night, apparently unable to take a single photo of Matty, she’s taken more photos of Adam tonight than she probably ever has. The way in which he is performing is growing slightly more aggressive, standing on the stage, seething, unable to do anything about it. Could you imagine what the crowd would think if he started shouting at his photographer mid-show?

She smirks as she comes round the back to take a couple photos of George, he shakes his head at her, and she lets out a laugh. Shrugging her shoulders as if she’s done nothing wrong, she quickly realises that coming onto the stage to take photos was a mistake, Matty turns his back on the crowd briefly and whispers in her ear, “What the fuck are you doing?”

“What? Nothing? My job.” Turning back to the crowd with a scoff he keeps singing, Sadie takes a couple photos of the view from the back of the stage, looking out into the mass of people, she smiles at her camera knowing it’ll be a good shot. Exiting the stage from the left hand side she takes a minute to look through a couple of the photos she’s taken as she sips from her water bottle. The events manager approaches her and smiles.

“Why aren’t you taking as many photos of Matty?” The way her sickly sweet voice punctures Sadie’s ears makes her cringe a little bit. But she hides it with a returned smile in her direction and turns her body slightly towards her. Taking in her professional outfit she hides a laugh, how she’s not sweating is one of the wonders of the world. The way she was very clearly flirting with Matty before the show had pissed her off and Sadie knew she was only asking because she wanted to see photos of Matty.

“Don’t worry about it.” Walking all the way to the back of the hall with no more words said, Sadie scoffs when she’s no longer in hearing distance. Shaking her head she snaps a few more pictures before heading back to the dressing rooms, hearing the band finish the show she busies herself with looking through photos. She likes to pretend she doesn’t exist after the boys finish a show, they also like to pretend she doesn’t exist, mostly high on adrenaline. Since people had started taking the band more seriously, the energy at their shows has increased tenfold. So has their egos but Sadie never makes comment on it. Hearing the stomps of Matty down the halls has her realising that pretending she doesn’t exist isn’t an option today.

“What the fuck was that? You’re embarrassing yourself.” Slamming the door behind him, leaving just the two of them in the dressing room, Sadie rolls her eyes. She watches on as he grabs a wine glass and pours from the bottle, he takes a sip and groans, shaking his head. When their eyes meet, Sadie curls into herself a bit, intimidated. “Just utterly pathetic.”

“What’s pathetic? Me not wanting to see your face? Did you forget the things you said to me? Or are you going to blame that as a ‘heat of the moment’ thing like you always do?” The slam of his glass on the table makes her jump and he turns to her with nothing but malice in his eyes.

“No, you should be able to hold a level of professionalism that allows you to do your job no matter how you actually feel, Sadie. You’ve always managed to photograph me even if I have been in the wrong, but not today. I’m calling you pathetic because I thought you were more mature than you actually are. Turns out I was fucking wrong, hmm?” Matty is leaning over her, pointing a finger down at her. She stands up to defend herself.

“Actually, I think that you speak to me like I’m a piece of shit on the bottom of your shoe and then expect me to carry myself professionally when in reality just the sight of your face makes me want to punch it. And oh, I’ll just carry on taking my silly little pictures and pretend you don’t come off that stage and hurt my feelings. Every. Single. Day.”

“Oh, I hurt your feelings? Fuck off, Sadie.” With this he leaves the dressing room and slams the door behind him so hard that Sadie sees the mirror on the wall shake a bit. She has to hold her laugh in when he comes back in for the bottle of wine. She really struggles to hold it back when George comes in and gives her a look like she’s dumb.

“What?” When George just laughs at her she laughs too. She grabs the second bottle of wine from the table and takes pleasure in drinking straight from it. “Genuinely what was I supposed to do? Let him keep treating me like this?” George leans onto her shoulder when he sits down, his voice is sympathetic, and Sadie is having none of it.

“You could’ve gone about it a bit nicer.”

“Why would I be ‘a bit nicer’ after all he’s done to me?”

“Yeah, you’re right, fuck him.” With that George takes the bottle and starts drinking from it too.

They’ve somehow ended up in a sleazy bar in Soho, they’d played just round the corner at some hall Sadie can’t remember to name. Matty’s still pissed, Sadie is very drunk, some would call this a recipe for disaster, George would call this a recipe for entertainment. Sadie has linked eyes with a notably cute guy a couple of times this evening, but she’s waiting for him to be the gentleman and make the first move to speak. As Adam stands up to get the next round she hears laughter from behind her and sees Matty flirting with some girl. She turns to Adam, “Get me a vodka shot, too.”

Adam really shouldn’t be encouraging her to drink anything that strong, but after clocking on to what Matty was doing he immediately adds it to the list of drinks he’s ordering. When it slides in front of her it’s down her throat practically before it’s even stopped sliding her direction. Ross grips her arm and laughs but she pays no mind to him, distracted by the bitter taste in her mouth, she’d be convinced the bitter taste wasn’t coming from the liquor. Eyeing the way Matty’s arm slings around the girl and his shoulders look slightly less tense she turns to search the crowd of people, looking for the guy who was eye-fucking her earlier. She leaps out the barstool when she sees him, throwing everything about wishing he was gentlemanly out the window. “Hi, I’m Sadie.”

“Theo, nice to meet you. I was gonna come over in a bit but here you are, like a dream in front of me.” Sadie laughs probably louder than she should’ve at this, hand coming down on his arm. At this Theo notices the lack of drink in her hand and rests a hand on her lower back, “Shall we go get you something to drink? On me, of course.” She lets him lead her back to all her friends, narrowly avoiding them as he leans over the bar to order her an espresso martini. She does not like espresso martinis.

“Thank you. I noticed your accent, Australian, right? What are you doing in England?” The small talk flows quite freely between the two as they exchange careers and anecdotes, Sadie finds it easy to talk to him. Not as easy as any of her actual friends but it’s good enough. She has to hold her breath anytime she takes a drink but they’re free, so she isn’t saying anything. Matty catches her eye for the first time since being distracted by the girl on his lap, when he catches a glimpse of the blonde boy standing next to her he shakes his head. She scowls at him and turns back to the boy, a bit closer than she was before.

“Do you wanna get out of here? Maybe back to my hotel?” Sadie doesn’t really hear him, she sees Matty shaking her head at something the girl is saying and when she starts shouting at him Sadie knows he’d just been asked the same question she has. Matty makes fleeting eye contact with her, making a look that reads ‘I dare you’. Turning back to Theo she nods her head, smiling up at the smug look on his face, shoving his arm slightly. She finishes her drink with a slight gag and grips onto his arm as he leads her out the front.

“How far is your hotel?” She’d love to know why she feels guilty.

Sadie’s sitting on the doorstep to their flat building with mascara staining her cheeks. When she’d gotten back to Theo’s hotel she experienced something akin to a panic attack and basically ran out of there, he’d chased her just to make sure she was okay and when all she said was, “It isn’t your fault,” he knew that it was the other guy from the bar holding her back, the one from her friend group, “I just have to get back to my flat.”

Feeling nothing less than mortified, she couldn’t bring herself to go in, so she was sitting smoking on the doorstep with the entire evening playing on a loop in her head. Dropping her head to her knees with a sigh she let one more tear fall before putting out her cig with her shoe and opening the door behind her. When she opens the door to the flat she’s met with silence, unsure if anyone’s home until she hears George snoring and a strum of a guitar in the room next to hers. Upon realising he’s the only other person awake she admits defeat and heads to her own room.

After brushing her teeth in the bathroom and grabbing water and some painkillers from the kitchen, she opens her bedroom door to Matty standing, staring down at her. Shutting the door behind her she looks up at him with a fixed glare, silently wishing he’d brush past her and shut the door so she could sleep. But no, as she shuts the door behind her she finds herself slammed against it. “You’re so fucking pathetic, Sades.” It might be the slight buzz she still feels in her head, but his words paired with his hands on her hips hit her right in her core, feeling like her head is about to float right off her shoulders.

“Matty, you’re just here to fuck with my head.” She really tried to make her words believable but the way she trails off into a whine makes it seem quite the opposite. The way in which her body always reacts to him the way he wants will forever make her angry, staring up at him trying to keep her glare steady on her face. It proves hard when Matty’s face moves down to her neck, attacking it with his lips, practically taunting her by the way he leans back up to swallow the moan that leaves her mouth.

She fights her body, trying her hardest to not kiss him back, but the way his tongue is licking into her mouth makes her desperate for anything he’ll give her. “Think you can just go fuck anyone, hmm? You’re wrong, angel. Belong to me, don’t you?” The scowl that takes over her features makes him smirk down at her. “Pretty when you’re angry. Gonna let me show you who you belong to?” She doesn’t want to nod but of course her body is doing things without her brains consent. To be fair said brain is actively turning to mush and melting out of her ears.

“Matty, please. Hurting my head.” After a quick glance up from her neck, he realises she doesn’t mean that literally, but instead she means that his actions are confusing her. He’s too in the moment to care, dragging her to the bed to put her out of her misery. The feeling of the mattress on her back makes her sigh in pleasure, he smirks down at her, working his hands under her, way too big, jumper as he hovers over her, moving down at a teasingly slow pace. She writhes on the bed until his hands take a strong grip of her hips, dragging them to the bottom of the bed before holding her in place as he kisses from her knee to her thigh. “Fuck, why do you always come crawling back to me? Just told me you can’t fuck me anymore.”

“I can’t get enough.” Letting go of her hips to move her panties down her thighs, her hands whip to his hair as she feels a puff of cold air blown onto her clit, her heart stopping in her chest at the feeling. He growls into her dripping cunt, licking a stripe up it before feeling her thighs squeeze his face, moving his hands round them to keep them apart. “Be good. Keep quiet. Maybe I’ll let you cum.” The whine that leaves her mouth is involuntarily and goes against what he’d just said, she knows she’s fucking in for it now.

Lowering her voice to a whisper she leans up onto her elbows, “Matty, do something.” Brown eyes looking into her blue ones with a teasing glint he gives her another kitten lick and her elbows give out on her, back arching from the mattress. The teasing pace of his tongue is making the whole ‘keep quiet’ thing impossible for Sadie, her entire fist is in her mouth at this point and her brain is wondering where on earth he learned how to do this. Sure, he’s eaten her out many times before, but this is her first time realising how good at it he’d gotten. “Please, stop teasing.”

Humming into her wetness, he ponders on whether he should give her more or not. Does she deserve it? “Me stop teasing you? Oh, angel. Take your own advice.” Something about the way she whimpers spurs him on to, in fact, stop teasing. Giving in to her immediately, his tongue finds her clit and picks up the pace by the most miniscule amount. Unwrapping one of his hands from her thigh, his fingers find her entrance, ever teasing, but finding their way in after she hisses down at him to stop.

When he parts for a breather Sadie can see her slick on his chin and the sight brings out something carnal in her. She grabs his chin and pulls him up to her level, smashing their lips together as if they’re running out of time. Pulling away from her, Matty looks down at her, jaw slightly slack. “Like tasting yourself? What do you want, angel? Speak to me.” His digits still slipping deeper into her makes it incredibly difficult for her to formulate words, after whining at him and being met with a cocked eyebrow, she manages.

“Want you.”

“What do you want me to do?”

“Just fuck me, Matty.” He doesn’t relent. Hands speeding up, kisses draped across her neck, his other hand finding it’s way up her jumper, squeezing her tits. Determined to pull at least one orgasm from her before giving in to what she wants. He groans into her neck when he feels how tight she’s squeezing his two fingers. “I’m gonna cum.”

“Let go then, angel. Give it to me, all over my fingers, gonna make a mess?” Frantically nodding, she feels her brain fading away into nothingness before his lips wrap around hers. Laying still, not kissing back, her orgasm takes over her being, Matty practically chews her moans with his teeth as if they were tangible. With a whine she rips his hand from between her thighs and finally gives in to the feeling of his lips on hers, kissing back with fervour. He pulls away to glance at his fingers, smothered in her arousal, the sight alone would’ve made him hard if he wasn’t already. Opening her mouth without having to be told to, she takes his two fingers into her mouth, sucking tiredly at them. “You tired?” Taking his hand out of her mouth to hear her reply, he smiles down at her blown out pupils.

“Fuck me, please.” Sometimes she can’t help but make the same mistakes.

Sadie had woken up hours ago. Some sick part of her is forcing her to stay in bed, under his arms, in his t-shirt. There’s an air of domesticity surrounding the pair, the way his dark eyelashes flutter slightly in his sleep has Sadie enamoured. Silently wishing things could be easier, with a sigh. Her brain starts to ponder on where things went wrong, and who might’ve been at fault, when she didn’t like the conclusion she came to she shut her eyes. Matty must’ve felt the way her body shook slightly, waking up slowly with a long stretch. “What you crying for?”

“I don’t know.” He squeezes his arms slightly tighter around her and wipes a tear from her cheek, unable to stop the concerned expression from taking over his features. Rubbing a soothing hand down her back, he shushes her until she’s calm, looking down at her slightly with an encouraging glint in his eye. “I just feel shit about the point we’ve gotten to. Wish we were 16 again.”

“Angel, don’t feel shit. I’ve been a dick to you recently and I’m sorry, I just don’t know how to speak to you anymore.” Sadie nods against his arm at his words, the soft smile taking over his face makes her feel at home. He looks like he’s 18 again in the mornings. It makes Sadie feel a bit sick.

“I don’t know how to speak to you either. We’ve spent everyday together for as long as I can remember, but it’s like you changed without me realising.” Matty hanging off of every word she says enhances the sick feeling in her stomach and she looks away from him. Grabbing her water from the bedside table she cradles her headache with her other hand and hears Matty laughing at her from behind. Putting her water back down she hits his chest and stands up. “I can’t have this conversation with you. I think I need to fucking find my own place. Then Ross and Adam can actually have their own rooms instead of being forced to share. Think it would be best for everyone.” Being met with a head of curls frantically shaking, she sighs.

“You can’t.”

“I will. Watch me.”

[mermaidfanficlibrary]

oh ok, then I'd like to request phony by tsumiki (I think?) with furina, wanderer and childe

idrc abt whatever else is in the fic, it could be fluff or angst (maybe that's more for furina or wanderer since the lyrics are abt not knowing their purpose/who they are)

I think that's all I need to write to request-

thank you <33!!

.·:🎼¨༺ Songs from the heart ༻¨🎼:·. | Phony

Characters: Wanderer, Furina, Childe

Song: Phony by Tsumiki

Warnings: Angst, identity crisis

A/U: Self aware genshin AU

CHILDE

You were doing a domain with Childe, obviously because you loved fighting in domains with him. He was doing really well, hitting high numbers, but the world around him paused. He knew this wasn’t a normal pause as you open one of the various menus of the game, but it was him having a sudden realization. Childe was used to you playing music as you fought during domains, but this one particular song struck a chord within him. You had thought you game broke because Childe was just standing still, but wasn't taking any damage.

“The rain of despair pelts my umbrella and. Dampens my bangs and the hidden side of my heart”

That one lyric out of this whole song made him snap. All of a sudden you had control over him and his numbers were a lot higher. Childe was putting a lot more force into his attacks. You didn't notice, but this song was heavily affecting him. That one lyric connected to him more than anyone else, and the fact that it was coming from you made it even worse. He tried to think why this one lyric hit so hard to him. 

This feeling hit him like a tidal wave, not knowing what to do or say. After you exited the domain, he just stared at you. He had this feeling that you were punishing him for hiding so much from you. The previous times where he hid the truth, not revealing who he truly was or what his intentions were. He hated himself that he had to lie to you, the deception he subjected to you.

He was sincerely remorseful about ever deceiving you, but it was for the greater good. If you had known, he was sure that you would have hated him. You just had Childe stand outside the domain, trying to figure out what you needed to do next, while Chide was having an anxiety attack. His eyes were shaky, and his hands were trembling as he couldn’t still his racing mind. He was sure that you must have hated him.

“I’m sorry I didn’t try hard enough to hide my truths from you.”

WANDERER

Wanderer may have seemed annoyed that you had him on the field to do boss fights, but deep down he was very prideful and proud about it. Of course you chose him out of all the others that you had, he was the best out of all of them anyway. Wanderer had this smirk on his face after every boss he had defeated, but that smirk disappeared as he heard a song play. This was normal, you obviously needed background noise, but this one song cause Wanderer’s mind to spiral. He didn’t know what to do as he felt trapped, but one lyric made it even worse.

“I can’t understand even the simplest of things; what even am I?”

He paused in the middle of his attack, the wind he was using quickly dissipated from his hand. All his memories came flooding back to him, as he tried to compose himself. Wanderer thought he was over this, he already confronted his past. So why was it all coming back to him so suddenly? It didn’t make any sense to him, especially since it was triggered by that one lyric. It was true, he didn’t understand anything, even after all the work he had done to understand humans.

He internalized this lyric and started to think it was how you saw him, but it didn’t cross his mind that it was how you saw yourself. You noticed that Wanderer wasn’t fighting anymore, thinking it was odd, so you decided to move him to a teleporter. You didn’t know if it was the game glitching or what, but you just let the game run on its own, hoping it would be fixed by itself. Wanderer started to cry, he didn’t think such a simple song could affect him and cause him to have a panic attack. He looked at you, hoping you would notice his pain in his eyes.

Wanderer kept his sole focus on you, trying to make sense of the purpose of the song that was playing. Were you trying to give him a sign, perhaps, or were you simply telling him you didn’t see him as what he wanted. His mind spiraled as he kept thinking on why you played that song, and if you even chose to play it. Wanderer didn’t want to accept the reality that he wasn’t real to you, that he was just a mere puppet with no emotions. As the screen dimmed, you still waiting for the game to fix itself, his eyes stared on with disbelief.

“Am I even real to you, creator?”

FURINA

Furina was skipping, even if you couldn’t see it through the screen, as you explored with her. She loved that someone as prestigious as you thought of her to be good for the job. She hummed to herself, seemingly enjoying the music that was playing in the background. You were fighting some monsters in Fontaine, and she was more than delighted to reign victorious, even if they were easy enemies. That delighted feeling got sucked out of her the moment she heard the song change to one that she couldn’t help but connect too.

“I cried, still unable to say even goodbye, phony phony phony. Tangled up in lies, I am a phony”

She felt tears well up in her eyes instantly. She couldn’t stop herself from crying, as she froze in front of the items of the fallen enemy that was just defeated. Her eyes were darting everywhere, trying to not focus on this one lyric. Furina instantly came to the conclusion that you saw her as a phony. She couldn’t blame you, however, since she felt like one herself. She wasn’t the true Hydro Archon after all, so what was she meant to be?

Tears feel onto the sand that she was standing upon, causing it to clump together. Her eyes stayed away from you, she couldn’t bring herself to even see you looking at her. She felt so much guilt and fear that you didn’t see her as anything but a phony. Furina tried her best to pull herself out of this negative spiral. She fell to her knees, more tears overwhelming her vision.

You hadn’t noticed as you became distracted with the music playing. Furina had held her hands as if she were praying to you. Her eyes were wide as she was fighting herself in her mind. Her breathing became labored as more tears fell around her. She started to yell out to you, hoping you’d hear her pleas.

“I’m not a phony! I’m not. I’m not. I’m not! Why won’t you believe me, oh great creator?”

Do not repost or translate without my explicit permission! Reblogs are welcome!

[comicglitterr0909]

write abt william afton falling for y/n after he realizes that y/n is also a murderer

I gotchu

Warnings kinda: Its a little dark with murder and everything, I kinda go into detail bout it, cursing, TW mentions of slitting throats and blood.

Murdering people isn't really the normal person's hobby. But it's mine and I'm not necessarily ashamed of it, I mean I know it's wrong but it's fun so who cares. I snuck my way into this abandoned pizzeria after seeing a few teens sneak in as well, I figured it would be an easy target. I make my way through the open garage door, following closely behind them, unbeknownst to them. They start joking about drugs, alcohol and mistreating women, how funny. Y’know, I think I'm doing something good with this kill. They all split up and go their own ways, perfect for me.

I decided to go for the strongest one first, so the others will be easier for me. He’s some jacked teen looking around the kitchen area. Using my 12 inch perfectly crafted knife, I sneak up behind him, slitting his throat quickly and easily. I stand and admire the blood gushing out of his throat for a couple seconds, before dipping my fingers in the liquid and drawing a smile on the floor next to him. There are 3 teens left, two are together, and one is alone. I hear the lone wolf shout for the one I just killed.

I had to decide whether I wanted to scare them and freak them out or just quickly do it, who am I kidding? Obviously I'm gonna scare the shit out of them.

I move the dead dude's body, so it is leaning against the refrigerator, then I use more of his blood to write on the fridge, “Behind you”. I then see a crowbar leaning against one of the shelfs, it's like it was left there for me. How did I know this was gonna work, I didn't, but might as well hope it does. I hide behind a shelf so that once the lone wolf walks into the room I can go behind him and well, stab him. Just like I had planned, he walks in, hearing his gasp and immediate fear is like music to my ears. He walks closer to the fridge, ah damn, he has bad eyesight, whatever I'm sneaky. I walk behind him, until he can read “Behind you”. I can tell he read it because he freezes up, and slowly turns around. To which I used all my might to hit him in the face with the crowbar I found. *BANG* And he hits the floor, knocked out cold, the only problem is it did make quite some noise. 

Since it was pretty loud I quickly moved to the other room, looking for the others. I make my way into a room that has a stage and a bunch of seats, that's when I see them, to the side of the room, pressing a large button titled “showtime”. I quickly duck behind a booth so they don’t see me while some freaky animatronics play “Pumped up Kicks by Foster the People”. To be honest that is the perfect song to kill a bunch of losers too, its like the animatronics knew I was there, cute.

I sneak behind the booths, while one kid sits down and the other is standing up close to the animatronics. I use my knife this time and press it against the kid sitting downs throat, shushing him until the other friend turns around. The horror on their faces really never gets old. The friend got to watch as blood poured from his friend's throat. Unfortunately for me, the friend turned to anger, and ran at me, trying to attack me, I fought back, surprised that he was attacking me, he didn't seem like the type to do so. I was about to win until I swear I saw one of the animatronics start moving after the song ended, it distracted me and he grabbed the knife from my hand pressing it against my neck.

Just as I thought I was gonna get a taste of my own medicine, some 6 '5 guy grabs the teen who was about to kill me, then he throws him halfway across the room like it was nothing. And god damn when I tell you I've never been more attracted to a man in my life. 

“Before you try and kill me like the others, I do this shit for fun too.” He says, helping me stand up. I look at him suspiciously, trying to figure out if he’s bullshiting me, looking him dead in the eyes. I guess he knew what I was thinking, so he walked over to the guy who he just threw, using the knife he plunges it deep into the kids eye socket all while grinning. I smile at him. “So, what's your name handsome?” He turns around, his shirt soaked in blood. He walks up to me, taking my hands in his. “William. William Afton, and yours?” “Y/N Y/LN” “Such a beautiful name dear.” I smile softly, looking into his eyes and for once feeling, love. He reaches up and wipes a bit of blood off my chin, cheesy but romantic for a killer. “We should go on a date sometime.” I suggest still smiling, he nods. “I would love to.” And thus started a deadly love. 

[chocottang]

post canon designs for when they get cured <3 /j

i added the canon designs next to them bc i was going to add design notes but i gave up so im gonna write it here and you can just. look at them

OK. yapping time. lets start with cami!!

the biggest change is obviously the hair. i interpret her hair in canon to be a way for her to hide, both her evilll intentions and her true self as a way not to get hurt, it also adds to her being mysterious. i apply this not only to the bangs hiding her eyes (the windows to the soul...) but also her whole hair, that's why in the canon design i exaggerated its length and made it kind of.. curl inwards like wrapping her. its hiding her, it's protecting her, it's suffocating her, it's making her mysterious. yes i'm obsessed with her hair. the blunt cunt can also be a sort of sign of her being polished, you gotta maintan those perfect ends so it doesn't look bad.

so. in her post-canon design the hair gets CUT into a bob. that symbolizes cami being open and honest, no more hiding! no more mystery! also, she's letting people see her, she's willing to make connections, meet people, love and be loved. but it also makes her more vulnerable, she can be judged more easily, hurt again more easily, but she accepts that possibility because know she knows how to navigate life and her own emotions with the help of her friends yippieeee

also, she still has the blunt cut because at the end of the day she's still the same person, and is in fact very polished and quite serious, but the braid can get quite messy, and that shows that she's more willing to accept her own imperfections

i took the braid from the hairstyle she has in her song bc its specific to her!! no more copying joy!! but still, its similar bc joy does also wear a braid, but cami puts her own spin to it. like, instead of trying to copy and be joy, she can just take inspiration from her and admire her while keeping her own style. on the topic of personal style, i added a black petticoat under her skirt to further personalize her uniform (also it made me think of witches hehe, yes shes not gonna do evil magic anymore but that´s still one of her interests and something she has done which she has to own up to and account for) and made her ribbon curl to allude to a chameleon's tail.

also. goldami earring

ok its golden time

longer hair!!!!!!!!! bc when he left his home he let his hair grow cuz he couldn't cut it and now he's just embraced it. it's about being rebellious, it's about rejecting gender norms, it's about embracing gender non comformity! not only can nobody tell him what to wear anymore, but also he's not letting the years of indoctrination and societal standards that still haunt his every move get to him babyyyyyyyy

i got COMPLETELY rid of any yellow or gold colors, no more golden boy persona, no more influence from the golden family, yes independence! grandpa cant get to your head anymore! now he's finally wearing the uniform, although very personalized. green sweater because green!!! when he's on his own he's shown to wear it a lot in canon!

made him wear flare pants just because i think they look fun, kind of a more fem twist ig. golden painted the pink flowers himself, they represent his bond with joy! a reference to the flower they hold in inoki and the pink used in the visuals of the song, too. the family's sexist double standards won't poison their relationship anymore!

decided to go for a ribbon instead of a tie to follow with the gnc look + because ties are considered very formal, and formal clothes are exactly what he was forced to wear, so no more! now he gets to wear normal clothes for normal situations.

i tried to make him more chubby but idk if its really that noticeable, but yea. accepting his natural bodytype

and, of course, goldami earring.

i may use these designs in other drawingssss so now u know the timeline lmao

[imobsessedwiththeatre]

Lets analyze dont lose your head song!! (Historical accuracy)

Grew up in the French Court- kinda?? She was at austrian court too i think. She was lady in waiting. NO SHE WASNT FRENCH just she spended most of her teenagw years here

Oui, oui, bonjour

Life was a chore so (she set sail)- exactly!! Her life in france was a chore!!

1522 came straight to the UK

All the British dudes, lame-the song made it seem she just moved to england, but she did not guys she was borned here :"). And she almost married a guy named William Carey, so its not rlly accurate

Epic fail

Ooh, I wanna dance and sing- yes! There was a show called "Chateu verte" or something i dont remember. And it was exactly in 1522 so its alr+

Politics, not my thing- i cant say if its accurate or not. I think she was quite interested in politics

Ooh, but then I met the King

And soon my daddy said, "You should try and get ahead"- YES

He wanted me, huh, obviously

Messaging me like everyday- it was like a stalk. He even sent her doctors when she got sick, without asking for it!!

Couldn't be better, then he sent me a letter and who am I kidding

I was prêt-à-manger-????

Ooh, sent a reply

Ooh, just saying hi

Ooh, you're a nice guy

I'll think about it maybe, xo baby- UHH?? HENRY STARTED ALL OF THIS FLIRTING?? SHE TRIED TO AVOID HIM??

Here we go

(You sent him kisses)

I didn't know I would move in with his misses- she in fact knew about his wife ane child.

(What?)

Get a life

You're living with his wife?- in 1530 henry wanted anne to movw into the palace, while trying to get catherine out

Like, what was I meant to do?

Sorry, not sorry 'bout what I said

I'm just tryna have some fun

Don't worry, don't worry, don't lose your head

I didn't mean to hurt anyone

LOL, say oh well

Or go to hell

I'm sorry, not sorry 'bout what I said

Don't lose your head

Three in the bed and the little one said- NO

If you wanna be wed, make up your mind

Her or me, chum

Don't wanna be some

Girl in a threesome- there wasnt any threesome?..

Are you blind?

Ooh, don't be bitter

Ooh, 'cause I'm fitter

Ooh, why hasn't it hit her?

He doesn't want to bang you

Somebody hang you- idrk if she would say it. I dont really know anything bout their relationship

Here we go

Your comic went viral

I didn't really mean it but rumours spiral- Yeah, they accused her of witch craft

Wow Anne, way to make the country hate you- FR. they loved catherine sooo...

Mate, what was I meant to do?

Sorry, not sorry 'bout what I said

I'm just tryna have some fun

Don't worry, don't worry, don't lose your head

I didn't mean to hurt anyone

LOL, say oh well

Or go to hell

I'm sorry, not sorry 'bout what I said

Don't lose your head

Tried to elope

But the pope said nope

Our only hope was Henry

He got a promotion

Caused a commotion

Set in motion the C of E

The rules were so outdated

Us two wanted to get x-rated- they already got 'x-rated'..

Soon, ex-communicated-yeah they made small secrwt wedding

Everybody chill, its totes God's will

Henry's out every night on the town-MHM

Just sleeping around, like what the hell?-YEA

If that's how it's gonna be

Maybe I'll flirt with a guy or three- NO. But they accused her of affair with her brother george, some violinist and other guy

Just to make him jell

Henry finds out and he goes mental- YEAH

He screams and shouts- wait he was rather calm i think?..yk he was abt to marry jane

Like so judgemental

You damned witch-Yeah...

Mate, just shut up

I wouldn't be such a b-

If you could get it up- UMMM...

Here we go

(Is that what you said?)- she didnt really argued tho..

And now he's going 'round like off with her head- it was like guards got her and her so called lovers on a talk

(No)

Yeah, I'm pretty sure he means it

(Seems it)

What was I meant to do?

(What was she meant to do?)

Like what was I meant to do?

(What was she meant to do?)

No, but what was I meant to do?

Sorry, not sorry 'bout what I said

I'm just tryna have some fun

Don't worry, don't worry, don't lose your head

I didn't mean to hurt anyone

LOL, say oh well

Or go to hell (she's going to hell)

Sorry, not sorry 'bout what I said

Sorry, not sorry 'bout what she said

Sorry, not sorry 'bout what I said

Don't lose your head

AND FOR THE REST?? ID SAY SHE WAS RATHER CONFIDENT THROUGH THE EXECUTION

[lenasprouts-words]

olderbrother!skz headcanons :3

gn!reader with a scenerio w menstruation in changbin’s! maknae line

i want an older brother… anyways

bang chan

oh ho ho you KNOW hes gonna be super duper protective of u

like nuh uh the kids can NOT meet you

but u still get to hang out w maknae + jin line (closer to their age)

age gap is like three years or smth so

his parents adopted you when he was four and u were one

movie nights every weekend frfr

or atleast movie nights on call

and whenever you got tea, he’s on the ready

best best advice, like, ever

sometimes you wonder if this is his nineteenth life or smth

so wise

you painted a mug for him once

no one is allowed to touch it

it has its place in the gym bros’ dorm

sometimes picks you up and runs when your talking to someone

and if you ignore him he’ll start cuddling up to you

’channie get tf away go annoy seungmin or whatever im studying’

gives you nicknames like ‘buggy bear’ and ‘baby duck’

makes you learn languages with him

when he learned ikaw for manila, ph concert he showed you first

bc he knows you like listening to tagalog

he has videos of you singing and falls asleep to it when he gets homesick

lets you listen to his unreleased songs and tracks on his laptop

you got to make one that one time at home too

you send little messages to him thru out the day

and scold him when he’s up working

you know bc he gave you his location

you bought his bubble and constantly tease him

when he comes home he takes you and berry to the aquarium

he picks you up and spins you when yall hug

its the funnest thing ever

will not hesitate to bring up that time you ate hamster poop thinking it was choco chips

lee know

okay he’d be really scary to your friends but like a cat around you

your age gap b like, one or two years

he annoys you about anything

crushes, enemies, good animes or mangas

stuff like that

in turn you bug him about the members

’whats jisung like when hes sick’ ‘oh do you know innie’s plans are tomorrow’

he finds your hyunjin pc collection and blows your phone up

but his hugs are so nice and warm

he holds you by the shoulders and his hands go down your back

eventually he starts tickling you

but you use the self defense moves he’s been teaching you

one of your middle school friends had a crush on him

they were flabbergasted when you walked home together

buys you things that remind you of him

and leaves it on your window sill/table/bed

his favorite hoodie is the bunny w the middle finger bc you gave it to him

makes your lunch for you and leaves slightly passive aggressive notes in them, still sweet tho

although once you got a note that said

’give me back my hoodie or i’ll shove a water bottle up your asshole. xoxo lino hyung’ that was for jisung

once decided to pick you up from work to get sushi

your coworkers were like

’wow i didnt know they had a boyfriend’

you cried laughing hearing that and so did min

teased you about the fanfic you wrote when you were thirteen

and you tease him about the 2PM shrine he had

obviously you both r cat ppl

so he takes you to cat cafe dates all the time

insists on paying and saying you’ll pay next time

sends random ass pics on tour all the time

changbin

he absolutely cherishes you

like holds you up like a trophy infront of his friends all the time

youre two-three years apart from each other

he loves loves giving you piggy back rides

also loves squeezing the life out of you

youre the one he goes to when he buys something

and he’s the one you go to for relationship advice

once you took him to an amusement park

your camera roll was full of blackmail

tens of millions of inside jokes

one of the kids will fix their hair and you’ll both burst out laughing

bc once changbin ran into a pole fixing his hair

your ultimate group is newjeans so you went to a fansign

and got bin a signed teddybear

he cried when you gave it

he constantly tells you to be safe

when your going somewhere

’bye baby cub (nickname lol), be safe have fun love ya!’

when you need a little pick me up

he comes to you with your favorite ice cream flavor and his laptop

your emergency contact

one of your friends has to text him and he gets super suspicious

’cub who tf is this? why were they texting me?’

almost started a whole ass fight

its okay tho he apologized and bought chocolate

constantly tells you to go to bed early bc he doesn’t want you to ‘become like channie-hyung’

will run to get you what you need

if you got your period and arent prepared he’ll know

just sprints to the nearest cvs

even cleans up your nasty bedsheets bc u leaked

’oh dont worry cub i can handle it’

your on his close friends list on instagram

most times its just dedications to you that he puts on his story

hyunjin

his day one frfr

like your only a year apart so your tight asf

his hugs will be gentle but so warm

bear hugs>>>>

his huge ass hands will totally go around your neck for comfort

he also digs his face into your shoulder

he paints many things for you

like he’ll also give you his unfinished projects when he’s sick of them

shines when you compliment him

teaches you choreos and lets you make up some

dyes your hair often too

spa nights where its just the two of you with a movie of your choice in the bg

those are the days where you can just. let go

tea gets spilt. i mean like, you know absolutely everything abt the other atp

spontaneous karoake nights

he gets worried when you drink tho

’noooo what if you fall on your face and then it gets ruined!!’

when he’s tired or down tho

one of the members text you and you come over with your comfort box you packed for these situations

face masks, iced americanos, watermelons, fluffy blankets, llama eye masks for sleeping, an air purifier, room spray, and a huge hoodie and sweatpants/shorts bc he probs did NOT shower in his funk

when he goes home you take walks together and catch up

also you just. really like smelling his room

it smells like flowers and the perfume your late grandfather used

gifts you things from versace

his favorite colors are black and white; yours are brown and grey

picture wall of polaroids w photos u took together

you stream his music 24/7

he writes sad sad songs abt missing you

worse than hannie and his break up songs 😭

working on the maknae line!

[beautifulchris]

muggleborn

pairing: lee minho x gn!reader

wc: 3,7k

featuring: bang chan, seo changbin, han jisung, lee felix, ateez’s seonghwa, the boyz’s changmin

summary: minho likes to go to the prefect’s bathroom to relax but oh! you're here as well

genres: hogwarts!au, kinda strangers to lovers!au?, slytherin!minho, hufflepuff!reader, fluff

warnings: it’s fem implied because in the universe, there’s one guy prefect and one girl prefect; other than that i used gender neutral pronouns

notes: thank you for reading and liking my work, it means a lot ♥ moodboard made by me, pictures found on the internet. reposting works from my old blog

order of writing: chan - jisung - minho - hyunjin - jeongin - seungmin - changbin - felix

networks: @kflixnet @k-labels @straykidsland

tag list: @badwithten @raethethey send ask/dm/comment to be added!

On a cold sunday in november, you were so exhausted from all the homework you had this week, you decided you needed a long, hot bath to decompress. Well, more like Seonghwa, your best friend, helped you finish your homework early and forced you to rest because he could see you needed some. You obviously went to the prefect bathroom because it was rarely used and very comfortable.

You opened the door after giving the password and soon realized someone was already taking a bath. Since nothing forbade several people to use the bathroom at the same time, you approached and saw Minho, eyes closed, humming a song you probably heard somewhere before. He seemed somewhat peaceful.

Minho was either feared, admired or loved. You didn’t know much about him so you were just curious. How could he be so cold yet afraid others would discover his secret? A secret you knew about since third year, the only time you talked to him, actually.

You had lost one of your most precious quills you owned and went to see Myrtle Warren in the girl’s bathroom on the first floor to ask for her help. You became friends with Myrtle in first year, when you entered the bathroom for the first time. At the time you didn’t know it was abandoned and ran into her. You’ve always called her by her name (not Moaning Myrtle) and been nice to her so anytime you would need help, she would accept without much complaint.

When you entered the bathroom, you first heard “I can’t tell them I’m muggleborn!” then saw two boys facing each other by the chipped sinks. You could see one’s back then a head popped up from the side and looked at you.

“Hi!” he said, waving his hand.

The other one turned around, glared at you and almost ran to the door. You saw the look in his eyes, he was scared. When he was next to you, your mouth moved on its own while you were still processing what was happening.

“Being a muggleborn doesn’t make you any different from the rest of the students. It’s almost incredible that you were born into a magicless family. Imagine how special that makes you. I promise you’re not worth less and if anyone dares to say otherwise, I’ll jinx them.”

You surprised yourself by your words, but maybe it was the Hufflepuff in you that couldn’t stand seeing him down like that. His heart warmed up and he smiled —you couldn’t see that— and he left without a word. Your gaze drifted to the door and you stayed like that until the one that greeted you came to you.

“Hey, I’m Chan.” You recognized him as the keeper of the Gryffindor Quidditch team.

“Y/N,” you smiled softly.

“Thank you for your words. I think it got to him.”

“With pleasure. It’s the same for you by the way. I hope you’re not feeling self-conscious about it.”

He looked at you dumbfounded. “How—”

“Just a guess,” you answered, “and your reaction proves I’m right.”

Chan smiled, showing his dimples, then made a more serious face. “Can I ask what you’re doing here?”

“I came to find Myrtle, I got robbed.”

“Oh shoot! I’m sorry about that.”

“It’s alright, Myrtle or I will find it. What were you doing here?”

He scratched the back of his neck. He was in the girl’s bathroom after all and he knew it. “Um. We needed a quiet place to talk and this one was the closest.”

For the little story, Myrtle found the quill, a second year had stolen it. He gave it back when you came to him with Myrtle giving him death glares from behind you.

(っ◔◡◔)っ ✿

You hesitated between taking your bath with him or leaving him be and coming back later. You didn’t really know him and you didn’t know if it was the right place to start a friendship so you decided it was best to go. When you stepped back, your eyes still on him, you stumbled on one of the sinks, swearing under your breath. He opened his eyes wide in your direction and stopped humming abruptly.

“Y/N??” Oh, he knew your name.

“Um, sorry, I’m going to leave, I’ll come back later.”

“Or you can join me? Maybe, if it’s not too weird?”

You froze. Was Minho really asking you to take a bath with him when it was literally the first time this year that you exchanged a word? Wow. Bold. Maybe he just saw the perfect opportunity to get to know you better and was internally praying you would say yes.

You did and joined him, seating not too far to hear what he would say but not too close either to insert boundaries. Because, yeah, you wanted to know more about him too but not scare him off. People labeled him as cold but at that moment, he was far from that. He kept smiling shyly and it was a nice sight.

You didn’t leave that bath until the water was cold and you had wrinkled fingers, meaning you stayed in there for about three hours, talking and playing in the water. You just had that connection with him and almost regretted you haven’t started talking to him before.

What you didn’t know was that Minho had a crush on you since the time you talked in the girl’s bathroom, three years ago. Your words really got to him and even if he never shared his secret information with anyone but his closest friends, he had this feeling that if anyone would come at him for it, you’d be by his side. In a way, the idea comforted him.

The next day, even after your efforts to rest, you were tired.

“I had so much trouble sleeping last night,” you sighed as you sat at the Hufflepuff table next to Seonghwa.

“Even after all my efforts to make you rest?” 

“It could be because someone was thinking about you,” proposed Changmin, your other friend, mindlessly playing with his marmalade toast. Both were Hufflepuffs.

“Who the hell could think of me at 3 am?”

A large group of people heard your sentence, including the ‘someone’ in particular, who was about to sit at his table, bowing his head in embarrassment.

Changbin, who saw and heard it all, laughed. “What, you’re the one preventing them from a good sleep? Man, I didn’t know you were so mean.”

“Shut up Binnie, like you can probably realize, I didn’t sleep much either.”

“When do you plan on telling them?” he asked as he gave Minho the tea-pot.

“When the time is right. Which is not now, we just started talking.”

“That’s a start, I wish you good luck.”

Minho sighed. “Thank you.”

Since that day, you would talk to him from time to time, getting to know each other better because obviously, three hours weren’t enough.

(っ◔◡◔)っ ✿

Weeks passed and a morning after the christmas holidays, you found a note on the backboard about the apparition lessons. You were thrilled by the news. In the Great Hall, you heard some students of your year already talking about it. You sat next to your best friend, who was already seated at the Hufflepuff table.

“Hi Seong. Can’t wait to take the apparition lessons,” you excitedly said as you poured cereals in the bowl in front of you.

“Hey, me too.” He gave you the milk and you thanked him.

“Bet you’ll apparate a mile south,” laughed Changmin, resting on his elbows in front of you.

You smirked. “Bet you’ll apparate under the rain.”

“You children.” Seonghwa’s remark only made Changmin and you giggle.

A week after you signed up for the lessons and paid the required 12 galleons, they finally started. It wasn’t as easy as you could think but you were determined in succeeding.

The first week, the ministry employee that came to give the lessons basically spent the entire hour talking about the dangers of apparating without a flawless concentration. Like leaving an eyebrow, a piece of cloth or even a leg behind.

The next week, the first tries were made. You all needed to try and apparate into a hoop by focusing your mind on the hoop and then spin around with the intention of appearing in the hoop. No one perfectly succeeded.

Weeks passed and the keeper of the Hufflepuff Quidditch team, Seungkwan, disappeared in front of you. Turned out he apparated in the Quidditch pitch.

“He probably thought too much about Quidditch,” Seonghwa had told you. 

If only Seungkwan was the only one to disappear. Juyeon, beater of the same team and Changmin’s close friend, ended up in the school grounds under the rain and Wooseok, from Gryffindor, was found a mile south.

Remembering your talk with Changmin a month before, you went to him after the lesson.

“Does that mean we can predict the future? Sounds scary,” he gasped dramatically.

“Idiot, it could happen to anyone. Sicheng apparated at the entrance of the forbidden forest last year.”

“How do you know?”

You shrugged. “Seonghwa told me. He’s a fan.” Sicheng was one of the chasers of your house’s Quidditch team.

The first person to succeed was you. You were astonished to say the least while your friends, on the other hand, weren’t even surprised. They always said you were the best of your year and this accomplishment was just proving it once more. A guy in the back made a displeasing comment about you but you didn’t hear. The next day during breakfast, however, you were obliged to see the same guy’s head inflating after drinking his tea. One of his prefects counter-spelled him and went back to eat like it was nothing.

Next week, Gryffindor Chanwoo apparated between the forbidden forest and the lake, although he was the last one to apparate anywhere else but into the hoop.

The following weeks, Seonghwa, Minho and Seungkwan succeeded, followed by Juyeon, Wooseok, Changmin and a few others.

“It was about time,” the latter had sighed.

The last few weeks, everyone managed to reach their goal without losing any members. Finally, all those you cared about had their license to apparate, including Minho, and you were proud of them —and yourself.

(っ◔◡◔)っ ✿

Life was somehow good to Minho because you too had feelings for him. The day you realized that, you were in your fourth year, at the library on your own, working on some transfiguration homework. A 6th year slytherin with books under his arm passed by you, calling you a ‘nerd’ with a disgusted face. It wasn’t an insult for you anymore, you were just doing your homework and listening in class, the rest was easy but only because you were passionate about it.

Seeing he was ignored didn’t please him but before he could add anything, his books turned into birds and flew away from an open window. The noise made you look up at the guy in disbelief while he was running out of the library and after his books, screaming, under the disapproving look of the librarian.

Behind a shelf, there was a boy who put his wand back in his pocket and returned to his homework as if nothing happened. You knew it was the boy you gave a speech to the year before and from this day, you were thankful for the countless times he got your back when you basically said you had his. Thinking your crush on him had no place to be, you tried to repress it, but his somehow protective behavior made it grow bigger. And here you were, befriending him two years later.

(っ◔◡◔)っ ✿

It was april, you were close friends with Minho by now and spent time with him everyday. Today, you were seated on a bench with Minho’s cat, Pepper, on his lap because yeah, he had a beautiful Russian cat with green eyes. You were almost giving more attention to Pepper than Minho but, he could totally get that, his cat was what he valued most in the school.

“I don’t really like your friend,” he sighed and for a moment, you were confused.

“Which one?”

“Your best friend.” You didn’t get why he was all mysterious all of a sudden.

“The only reason I see you could hate him for, and that’s pure jealousy, is his height.”

“Wait— you’re saying I’m small?” He looked at you in disbelief.

“You’re the one saying it, not me.” You smiled so brightly his heart skipped a beat. Maybe he didn't have to be scared of him.

Later that day, Seonghwa and you were in your common room, doing your homework together.

“So, how’s it going with Minho?” he asked as he was closing a book about potions he borrowed at the library.

“What do you mean?”

“I guess none of you confessed yet,” he whispered, then cleared his throat. “Are you going to confess?”

You didn’t even bother asking him how he found out. “You’re not my best friend for nothing, uh. Am I that obvious?”

“It’s sickening. I wish one of you would do something about it soon.”

“Thanks for your opinion Seong, it’s much appreciated but—”

“Oh please, don’t start with your ‘but he doesn’t like me’ bullshit, he DOES. Listen to me. He’s as obvious as you, if not more, so please, do something about it or I swear I will.”

(っ◔◡◔)っ ✿

The next day in history, you were seated next to Seonghwa, like 100% of your classes. Minho was behind you with Dahyun, the Slytherin prefect with him. The class was often a bit boring because the professor would often talk way more than necessary. Today, you knew the subject already so you let yourself relax a bit and take less notes.

“Hey, I was wondering,” said Seonghwa out of nowhere, “what’s your favorite flower?”

“I think it would be Parrot’s beak. It’s from the Canary Islands and pretty rare,” you replied after a moment of reflection. “Why?”

“Oh, just like that.” He winked and gave his attention back to the professor.

“What’s yours?”

“Oak-leaved geranium.” His eyes never left the blackboard and you hummed in response, going back to listening as well.

At the end of class, Minho was the first one to run out. He took a secret passage behind a tapestry which led him to stairs. He followed some fourth years and when he saw a Gryffindor getting his hair colored in red and standing on end, he just knew who was behind it. He soon enough saw Jisung and his partner-in-crime laughing their asses off, that was until they saw him.

As prefect, he was in the obligation to take points from Jisung (only, because his friend was in Slytherin and he couldn’t afford to take points from his own house). Since he was impressed by the fact Jisung put a transfiguration spell in a hair-rising potion, he decided fifteen points would suffice instead of twenty.

“By the way, I need to ask you something.”

“Just after taking points from me? That’s bold.” Jisung crossed his arms.

“It wouldn’t have happened if you respected the rules, you know.”

Getting out of arguments, he surrendered. “What can I do for you?”

“I need you to find Felix.”

Jisung pushed the older one in the closest empty room then took the Marauder’s Map (for more info read Jisung’s au) out of his inside pocket (he made it himself). He recited the formula and looked at it closely.

“Felix’s outside by the lake. I’m not surprised, are you?”

“I must admit I’m not. Thanks.”

Without waiting a second more, he ran to Felix, who was playing with a plimpy he befriended. The creature fled as soon as it saw Minho running its way.

“Minho? Are you okay?”

He held a hand up while catching his breath. “I’m alright. I need you to put something in the Hufflepuff common room.”

“What, exactly?”

Minho looked around him, took a stone that was at the edge of the lake and gave it to him. “This.”

Felix examined the stone. “…This?”

“Yeah, somewhere Y/N could see it, please.”

He nodded. “Consider it done.”

“Thanks. By the way, do you know what oak-leaved geranium means in the flower language?”

“I believe Seungmin once mentioned it meant true friendship, why?”

Minho didn’t realize at first that he was smiling widely. “Just like that. Thank you so much.”

He then went to the library, needing one last thing: a picture of a parrot’s beak. Once he looked in every flower book in the herbology segment, he asked the librarian, who eyed him scornfully.

“Parrot’s beak isn’t magical. You’ll find what you need in the muggle area. Be quiet now.”

He mouthed a ‘thanks’ and walked to the said area to find what he was looking for.

When he found it, he went to the dungeons to hide behind a huge statue, used Orchideous to make a bouquet of parrot’s beak out of his wand, added a note and waited. Felix soon entered with the stone in his hand. Minho knew he would stay by it until you would find it. A few students entered the Hufflepuff common room, then you came in with your best friend. Minho approached discreetly and used a switching spell to switch the bouquet with the stone. Then, he left before anyone could see him.

You were about to sit on the couch when a beautiful bouquet of parrot’s beak appeared out of nowhere. You beamed and took them in your hands.

Seonghwa looked at them too. “There’s a note.”

“What does it say?”

Seonghwa took it and started reading. “To Y/N, the most kind, smart and stunning person on earth. From a MB.”

You smelled the flowers and smiled joyfully. Seonghwa was smiling too, almost amused.

“How did they know it was my favorite flower?”

“We talked about it twenty minutes ago, Y/N. Someone must have heard it.”

“Is it you?” you enquired.

“I’m sorry but it wasn’t me. I didn’t know what they looked like. They’re really beautiful, by the way.”

Felix watched the entire scene and was pleased Minho made you happy. He couldn’t wait to tell him about your reaction.

(っ◔◡◔)っ ✿

Seated on the couch with your bouquet in one hand and the note in the other, you were thinking. “MB…”

“Is that initials?” asked Seonghwa.

“Or Miami Beach.”

“Really, Changmin?” Seonghwa face palmed.

 He shrugged. “Just giving options.”

After a while, you sat up straight. “Oh my god.”

“What?” Both the boys asked, confused.

“Muggleborn,” you whispered.

“Makes sense,” approved Seonghwa.

Changmin was looking at his friends. “Does it, though?”

Thing is, you knew a lot of muggleborns (and were too oblivious to think about Minho).

(っ◔◡◔)っ ✿

The next day, Felix went to Minho before breakfast. “Y/N was beaming. Never saw a smile that bright and eyes so sparkly.”

Minho’s smile was wide. “Thank you so much, Felix. Do they know who did it?”

“I’m not sure. I don’t do eavesdropping,” he said, giving his friend a subjective look.

“I don’t do that either!”

“Sure. How’d you know Parrot’s beak was Y/N’s favorite flower then?” Minho’s cheeks burned and he refused to look the younger in the eyes.

Later, you found Minho at the library and spent time with him.

“So, I heard you received a bouquet,” he said as casually as he could. For a brief moment, he thought you were going to ask him if it was him and got scared.

“Yes, the flowers were really beautiful. I put them in a vase on my nightstand.”

You were beaming and Minho, seeing you this happy, almost revealed himself. 

“I wonder who sent them though. I mean, these flowers aren’t that known, even in the muggle world.”

His lips were burning to tell you but he was scared the feelings weren’t mutual.

“Minho? Why do you look sad all of a sudden? Did I say something wrong? Is this about the,” you stopped to get closer to him and whisper, “muggles?”

He couldn’t believe you were worried about him. “Oh, no, no, don’t worry! I— um, was wondering if, I don’t know, you had an idea on who sent it?”

“Actually, I do have an idea.”

Minho gulped. “You— you do?”

“Yes. The person’s obviously in history class with me. And they’re seated close to me. Plus, they’re muggleborn, from what I learned from the note. So I narrowed it down to two people. First Dahyun, which, I think, has zero reason to send me flowers as we never really had any conversation. Also she glares at me from time to time. Doesn’t add up.”

The boy was sweating. The more you talked, the more he regretted his question. What if you rejected him?

“The other person, on the other hand, we’ve talked more and I highkey want it to be him.” You looked him in the eye with such intensity he choked on air.

“Who’s that?” he risked.

A smirk was spreading on your face. “Vernon. He’s cute.”

His face dropped and you couldn’t help but laugh. Teasing him was funny.

“I’m kidding, it’s you.”

At this moment, Minho was still confused but happy. If he understood what was going on correctly, you knew it was him who sent you the flowers and you wanted it to be him??? He absolutely didn’t see it coming.

“So… you… like me?”

You smiled at him fondly. “I do.”

His heart was pounding, he was ready to kiss you. You felt like he was thinking about Seonghwa so you tried to reassure him as much as you could.

“Seonghwa is my best friend, nothing more. I can assure you.”

“Oh, I know,” he said, a satisfied smile on his face. “I like you too.”

“I was hoping you would say that.”

“Can I kiss you now?” You bit your lip, the question was really attractive.

Without answering, you got closer to Minho and pressed your lips to his.

“How dare you make out in the library? OUT! IMMEDIATELY,” shouted the librarian from behind. You both moved back from shock and ran out, hand in hand, a big smile on your faces.

thank you for reading! if you enjoyed, please let me know <3 and here's the masterlist!

[synthshenanigans]

I'm curious as to peoples idea for what he'd do for the next power hour so

[These all being popular ideas or ppl he's mentioned]

This was all just a ploy to get you to read my info dump theory on the concept of a Chonny Jash Power Hour loser HAHAHA

Im joking tho. Not about my CJPH theory, that is very much real but I'm not forcing you to read it lol

However if you're curious, my inane rambles are further down :}

[Long Rant Post Below]

Okay so I'm gonna start with the basic idea I got it from; that being Nerd. Nerd already foreshadowed the THDPH & the WWPH [Even down to the last song for each of them] Not only that, but he references the stuff hes done in the past as well with a break/pause inbetween.

[This is what I mean]

The first three being all stuff he already did. BDG with Pocket, Tally Hall with Vol.1 & then Cage by Tim Minchin being the start the power hours.

The next two being the power hours he would do after this song [Memento Mori & Charlie's Inferno-Will Wood & That Handsome Devil]. But those are the only songs he would reference in Nerd, leaving no more clues as to what the last one would be. The only thing left in it is the video game references & Stairway to Heaven in the ending. [Which oddly enough also fit the pattern in a way. StH being about dying and the afterlife like Memento Mori & Chonny's Inferno and the video game references being all covers he made on his old channel]

While the VG refs could be a hint at a Videogame or Toby Fox Power Hour, I think at most, if its a clue at all, hinting at the next thing he does is recovering old songs.

----

Next, a couple of his songs reference his past stuff. Fine, I'm Fine has a good amount of lines that vaguely refer back to songs from the before [heres a post that goes more into it that's pretty cool!!]. And more importantly Dear Machine references Pocket, Dream (Outro from Calamity) & wings of wax. Pocket being later used in Nerd & the mention of Icarus coming back in Art. Not only that, but the voice in the very end Thermodynamic Lawyer is the exact same [if not very close to] voice filter/effect he uses in Dear Machine. Even down to the British accent he does in it. [Tho it is fairly normal for a music artist to reference their older songs in their music so it could be nothing]

Speaking of Dear Machine tho, quick thing to add about it is that it shows he not against covering his own songs. While yea technically its just a different version of Ode of the Cog, DM,HtC in a way counts as a cover of OotC. Same goes for bargaining/compromise & The Ballad of Dr. Jekyll.

----

Another idea with a CJPH is that in the CJFS discord theres a "Question of the Day" Channel. Where, as the name says, a Mod or Helper will ask a CJ related question & everyone can give their idea/imput on it. For Day 100, as a special fun lil thing, they asked Chonny if he wanted to give a question for that day. His question being:

And yes he does say that he doesnt plan on doing anything like that in future [if he even were to do it]. I fully believe he wasn't lying there & honestly I never saw him redoing any song ever until I had the idea of a CJPH [aside from stuff like Spring and a Storm & Storm and a Spring obviously]. But this is the best idea I could ever see him doing that. Also that question was from early August so a fair amount of time has passed. Whether thats enough time to equal "at least in the near future at all" I have no clue, but it is a thought.

----

One of my last points [that I remember atm lol] is on how he would end the power hours. Cos like, while yea he does whatever he wants & doesn't rlly follow what anyone says or asks [which I 100% agree with & is completely valid btw], I'd imagine he'd still want to end the PHs with a bang. Which is why I originally didnt think the recent one would be Will Wood.

He's stated a couple of time that hes one of his favorite artist & he definitely knows that a huge chunk of his fan base listen to WW as well. So why not end with that? Why not end with one of the most requested artist people wanted him to cover? Why wouldn't he end with a power hour of the artist that was his #1 on his Spotify Wrapped? What else could he do after that? Well maybe he'd go with his #2 artist? WHICH IS JUST HIMSELF BBYYYY

Plus, the name Power Hour already comes from this:

So it's very likely he's had himself play multiple times in a row & had a "Chonny Jash Power Hour".

Of course theories are just theories so there's always the chance I'm wrong & just insane. And again he does whatever he wants whenever he wants so who knows what it'll be. I just think id be an interesting idea for him to do.

As for how a Chonny Jash Power Hour would look? Maybe each song being a cover of a song from a past album or single? I'd imagine one from the before. & Covered in Discontent [maybe Gothic Whore?]. Like remake Pocket since its been referenced so much, tho that's still just a BDG cover so who knows. the before. would be interesting just to see how his perspective has changed since he originally wrote those songs. Gothic Whore he already has 2 songs that have a story version & a him version so I can see him doing another.

I HIGHLY doubt he'd do anything related to Vol.1 as its his completely separate thing & he doesn't rlly wanna touch any song that's TH/HMS related until whenever he feels like starting Vol.2 [which is valid lol]. If anything I could maybe see like TWWAY, Special or maybe Greener? Or go a different route with the og I'm Gonna Win or like a more outta the box one with like Just a Friend [only cos be did a 20 second "cover" of it in Mucka Blucka]. Again, I do not see him touching anything Vol.1 related but still something to entertain ig? [4th TME cover; The Chonny Electric when/j]

Tho maybe he'd just remake songs that he he fully made [like the before. or Gothic Whore], since those are more of actual Chonny Jash songs rather than the others just being covers. Would be very cool to maybe see a remake of some of his Majora's Mask song tho [no this isn't me coping over HEAL not being on spotify shush]. Or maybe he'd do songs from his old stuff like Don't Take it Personally? [also not me coping over wanting that song on Spotify too]

Idk these are just my thoughts on the idea of a CJPH [or even a Can of Soup Power Hour/j]. Either way I am gonna say idc what he'd do, BDG or Streetlight Manifesto are my other guesses, but anything he makes is always rll good & fun so I'll be interested to see whatever it is.

But ya know considering I typed all this out in the span of an hour & a half I kinda hope im not wrong PFFT

[average-vibe]

~You First~

Pairing: Tom Simons X Fem!Reader

Summary: Friends to lovers w Tommy

Genre: fluffffffff

TW: cursing

Request: “OMG I ABSOLUTELY LOVE LOVE *LOVE* TAUNT!!!! CAN WE PLEASE GET BLESSED WITH A TOMMY VERSION, ITS ALL I NEED TO SEE IN LIFE I SWEAR OH MY GOD THIS BLOG IS HEAVEN”

AN: Hi! i loved this request! basically it’s the same storyline as taunt but some parts are written differently! hope you love it! tysm for the love 🫶 (also this pic of tommy is so cute omg)

masterlist

BANG

You sighed with a smile as you picked out the blue top you were planning to wear.

BANG

“TOMMY! GIVE ME 2 MINUTES!” you shouted, pulling the shirt over your body. You grabbed your shoes and bag, and head out of the door, where you saw tommy. His hair disheveled and shirt wrinkly. He looked messy. but also cute.

“Geez, Simons. Did you wake up 3 seconds ago?” you playfully asked, looking at him up and down.

Tom rolled his eyes. “At least I’m not 20 minutes late!” he excused, pulling his hair, making it look slightly less terrible. “And i was going to say that i liked your shirt, but i guess not.”

you rolled your eyes, cheeks slightly turning into a pink color. “Fine. I guess your shoes look alright.” you said it in a reluctant tone, but in reality, his shoes did look good. They were your favorite color, after all.

“Good, we’re even.” Tommy said, walking over to his car and opening the door for you. “M’lady,” he spoke, giving a bow.

“Thank you, kind gentleman!” you responded in the same tone.

This was how it always was. You and Tommy playing with eachother, wanting to make the other one smile or laugh. it was just the way everything was supposed to be. How you and him wanted it.

Well, how he wanted it.

obviously, you loved him. He was one of the things you lived for, at this point. But you had always wanted more. You loved him so much you didn’t know what to do with yourself. If you weren’t so stubborn, you would say you were in love with him.

But those thoughts had to stay in your head. You couldn’t ruin the friendship over some selfish desires.

“Hey, earth to YN.” Tommy said, hopping into the car. “Pretty sure this is the quietest you’ve ever been.” he joked, making you fool your eyes with a smile.

“Mhm. You should try it sometime. It’s peaceful.”

“Oh, is it?”

“Yup.”

“Only for you.” he flirted, smirking at you. Oh course, tommy would change a playful conversation into a flirtatious one in a matter of seconds. you blushed.

“Shut up, Tom.”

Tommy POV

As the two of you rode down the road, on the way to a Café taht you had convinced him to try, Tom couldn’t help but to glance at you. You had just become so pretty after so many years. He had always thought you were pretty, but somehow, you kept on getting more and more beautiful as time wore on.

“What?” You asked, raising an eyebrow.

Shit.

You had caught him staring.

“Keep your eyes on the road, Simons.” You reminded him, Toms cheeks flushing red.

“Can’t help it sometimes, YN.” Tommy said, regretting the words as they left his mouth.

He ignored your body turning towards him in shock, eyes blown wide.

“What did you say?” you asked.

“I dunno. Didn’t say nothing.” Tommy replied, nervously fidgeting as he drove.

“Yeah, you did. I heard you!” You said, smiling now. “I heard what you said!” you said in a sing-song voice.

“If you heard, what did i say?” he asked, smirking.

“You said that i was pretty! You can’t keep your pretty little eyes on me can you?”

“You think my eyes are pretty?”

“I’ll answer when you answer mine.” you retorted, a sly smile on your face.

“You first.”

“No way!”

Tommy kept silent at that for once, eyes kept on the road. The car ride was quiet for the rest of the time, small glances being shared between the two of you.

Reader POV

You watched Tommy order as you paid and sat down. Eventually, he sat down next to you. “Gonna talk or just gonna stare?” you asked, smirking.

“I think i’m just gonna stare.” he answered, smiling lightly at you. You blushed at that, looking down.

“In case you haven’t noticed, i like you. a lot. And i wasn’t planning on telling you like this, either.” He said, almost so quiet you couldn’t hear.

“I like you too, Tommy. I have for a while now.”

His small smile turned into a wide grin, eyes bright.

“You do?”

“Of course.”

——

AN: HEY BBGS! HOPE U LOVED IT!

[traumatizedjaguar]

COLLECTIVE CONSCIOUSNESS Master-post: I want to make this explaining what knowledge God has given me over the years

not so loving and boring crap, skip:

Yeah I can see economic collapse happening. I don't want to jump the gun and be one of those "crazy people" that believe in conspiracy theories because I absolutely am not one of those people and I'm not a conspiracy theorist (nor have I ever been, they've just been fun to look at in the past). This is very realistic. But let's just say I wouldn't be surprised if an economic collapse were to happen in the US and all over. I'm open to the fact that it may never happen, but I asked God to show me and He showed me and I shouldn't live in denial... I genuinely see it coming; even before God told me anything I studied the system closely since I was at least in 6th grade. I've always been anti-authority and interested in dystopias coincidentally because of how much empathy I have for others; I always felt depressed about the world and saw the red flags in our system. Food industry poisons us, 99% of the food in the grocery store is poisoned in some way and the food pyramid IS A LIE; school is a prison that kills creativity and passion, sports is controlled and overrun by abusers, clothing industry, religion in general and catholicism enslaves people and is a lie controlled by the terrorists in power, politics and government or what the CIA has fucked up on in the past because of their lack of Love.

we're all making a choice and its our own destruction. I take full accountability for what I've been apart of but we're all flawed. God doesn't want perfection, He just wants us to cooperate and love one another. two rules: spread compassion and DO NO HARM. Is that behavior of yours or action of yours or your thoughts or intentions harmful? try to be kind instead. it aint that hard to be kind. simple. its simple. Just like Architects new album - "for those that wish to exist: abbey road" states exactly what conclusion I've come to, I wouldn't be surprised if there was a interview of the singer-song writer talking about a spiritual awakening like how Kesha did already.

Also, don't trust people like John Rich (tucker Carlson interview about his song Revelation) who is obviously hired by the government to lead you to fear and the idea that we're all heading to hell: hell doesn't exist stop thinking about it. "lord will turn away from all their cries" and about every lyric is to fuck with you. God loves you and you need to love yourself and live on the right path. Meditation is an essential to living. You need it like you need food and water. *also to add: prophets are fake, that man - forget his name too lazy rn - who prophecied trumps shooting is hired by the government no doubt; if hes preaching christianity or catholicism he is just apart of the gov*

The CIA has used psychic mediums, astral projection, and spirituality in various projects for the longest time. The government has known about the collective consciousness and who we really are for a LONG time now. Do your research, I could write whole ass essays on this, but you can figure it out yourself.

God spiritually awakened me. My personality was coincidentally set up from a young age to lead me on this path.

the govern ment is a cult. yes. religion is too. we're no better or worse than Russia, china, North Korea... all dystopias in their own way

COLLECTIVE CONSCIOUSNESS

Who are we and where do we come from? Is there purpose to our lives? Who is God?

God is the singular source of everything in creation including us. He is also called Love, Joy, Source and we can always go back into Him. God is consciousness, thought... and He created us in His image, we are consciousness and thoughts and intentions are creation and are more important than actions because of that reason; we all collectively decided to use our intentions to simulate the physical universe we live in.

The Big Bang of the physical reality in our 3D world is all imagination, intention, thought essentially.

Life is just a dream within a dream within a dream. When you die, it's like waking up from having a vivid dream last night. You become more lively, awake, real because you gain back what senses you left behind for awhile.

We live in the illusion of physicality, time, death, mortality, and duality.

We are demigods. Our true nature is the soul, a free-floating immortal consciousness that is the light made up of vibrations which we are all gods of our own making with our own individual personalities. We are immortal, can't feel pain as it's an illusion under our control, omnipotent, omnibenevolent, omniscient. That's what a "higher self" is when evidential psychic mediums refer to that. We are the light and pure eternal consciousness, we are light-beings. Dying is safe and death itself is safe.

Time is an illusion, it doesn't truly exist. You could go back to this lifetime as you now again if you wanted to and restart it (but no god does that as there is nothing to be gained especially if abuse occurred you'd rather not obviously). You can slow things down, speed things up, or just do something and have it happen like with the snap of a finger; with a single intention you could make something happen immediately.

Duality and death are illusions. Grief is a temporary thing as they never really died. The human side of us delved too far gone into resentment and envy, jealousy, anger, hatred, fear, disconnection, lack of empathies, despair. Holding onto anger doesn't bring peace; you come from oneness as Love is connection so you have to pick between revenge or being pro-recovery because you cannot have both, you pick between growth or the cycle of abuse because you cannot have both. This is basic science psychology, we learn this in therapy even. What God taught me is that hexing or acting on bad intentions or bad actions toward another (even if its "deserved" or at an abuser) you are depleting and killing Mother Earths vibrations which effect how She functions, it traumatizes more than your target and hurts you in return because you reap what you sow and everybody gets a life review. Studies show that protestors that focus on revenge instead of compassion for their group end up hurting their side much more than helping which shows you cannot be duel in this. Pick peace, joy, happiness and compassion and more rights for your vulnerable community OR you can pick destruction on both sides and less human rights.

It is a never-ending cycle of reawakening ourselves every lifetime and learning how to bring forth our godliness while in a human vessel, learning how to love in a low vibrational realm, and we're here because we're groomed to become gods. We bring back knowledge and experience from the physical. We want to love in a different way because we have physical body parts to do things with. In heaven souls hug by absorbing their consciousness into another and becoming one. You can also make "physical" things in your own way and stories, you can do essentially anything you want because you are a god (of many). Especially in certain dimensions or realms you can socialize with other souls who want what you want. Oneness and connection is what Love is.

You can go back to any lifetime, any "new" one, any reality, any dimension or God/Source anytime you want. It's like a sandbox, open world gameplay we're all in. Life is like a play, a movie, a video game... where you choose your planet, your character, sometimes attributes you want to be born with like making a sim or rolling the dice on it, you level up by vibrating to higher dimensions and each dimension you unlock new abilities and superpowers such as bending energy, using the earths energy and material in new ways, consistent euphoria and joy, no need for sleep but enough energy, developing space craft thats sleek and fast, traversing the universe through space and time, and growing and learning in your journey as a god!

5th dimension is where heaven begins. (4th being time). Suffering and death are transcended, you lose all of the flaws that came with being a 3rd dimensional human like I said you unlock new levels then new abilities; you can see better and don't have a need for glasses, you would have your 5 senses plus many more and your senses differently. You can co-create with other gods because thats what we're wired for: co-creators, wanting to love and to be loved, free-will, peace and joy, creativity, education and knowledge, and play!

You can use the earths energy and materials to build and create differently in the 5th dimensional earth, it's like unlocking whole new levels or unlocking achievements in a video game. Every dimension is "physical" in its own way, a 5th dimensional creature would look like a ghost to us and could walk through walls and see through something solid to see what's inside.

We limit ourselves as humble gods do and come down here for challenges and the journey back to Source. So as long as you stay aligned with your True Self (the god side of you) then you will be able to accomplish all these things in life. Love = virtues = who we are.

Humans only see a small percentage of the color spectrum because we're limiting our godlike abilities down here for fun but back Home we can see the full spectrum of color again. You can only see ahead of you and in your peripheral vision while in a physical human vessel but back Home you can see 360 degrees at once and for a thousand miles, clear vision. Because you're just free-floating immortal consciousness, nothing is restraining you anymore. Obviously your senses go from 5 to 50.

"I must've forgot I'm a Demi-god. I always feel so blue, but im a Demi god" - Architects.

We create and build our character through free will and various lifetimes in the physical reality and on many planets, but we don't have to go to the physical 3D world on earth if we don't want to we can always stay in heaven or go anywhere else. We can link up with other souls and keep them as family in heaven or incarnate with them in stories of your own making; you can make stories in some of the highest realms of heaven or on earth or anywhere with no tragedy or cruelty or duality and because you're so at One with everyone it isn't hard to find many souls who just want the same thing as you.

You can build a whole script in higher dimensions (if you wanted to but you don't have to and life in the 3D is NOT scripted at all) choose to put the veil over your eyes and forget it and play out the story with other souls who consent to joining in on your love story. Going to the 3rd dimension on earth is like joining the marines, you're here for a purpose and it's to "fight" (human terms of duality) for Love to win; our purpose is to serve the world. We are here to serve each other, God doesn't need anything from us, He is Source and perfect and perfection doesn't NEED anything, let alone worship. WE need each other down here; virtues are what it's all about. The essence of our soul is our moral compass...

Tap into it and you will begin to feel the energy literally flowing around you, your relationships and social interactions become easy, gliding and at one with each other and you feel more peace. You will be able to be on the right path with the right people and passions, etc.

You are still your own individual god on your own journey just like millions of other gods and you can speak to the source God who created us anytime you want. Somebody recommended Suzanne Giesemann to me for meditation and she's got some good ones and this one is a real game changer.

"there’s magic in our bones, a north star in our soul that remembers our way home. there’s magic in our bones." - Body by Sleeping At Last

because of the simulated physical world we *NOT separated* but distanced ourselves from God (Love) and from each other by going into these vessels in 3D, which caused suffering to break out. If everyone on earth had a NDE we all would find world peace.

"All my worries were a waste of time, made the world so blurry I was going blind." - Caleb Shomo

The universe is made up of music and is built perfectly such as the fibonacci sequence seen everywhere. Every dimension vibrates at its own frequency. Dimensions are all in front of you, stacked on top of each other, essentially in and around you at all times. I believe there are 12 dimensions about but I will check with God or my higher self to see what they say.

We are omnipotent. If you believe you are limited or whatever you choose to believe about yourself you will make it that way. Believe you can and you will as human, you can do anything as a human that the soul can do - just believe like a child believing in a fantasy and you will make it or create it. We can do anything, anytime if you just believe.

Omniscience. In the afterlife there is shared knowledge among all souls with God meaning we're omniscient. instant communication because there is no physical vessel nor a mouth piece anymore. So when you have a thought, it's instantly shared and another souls response is shared instantly back. intentions are instant knowledge too. there is no privacy because love is connection and thats what the collective consciousness is. interconnected, interlaced energy forever.

You get back what you put out... you reap what you sow... as above so below. It refers to the layered structure of the universe, that immaterial laws rule matter from above. There are laws of correspondence and interconnectedness, everything is always in correspondence. The realization between the macrocosm of the universe (above) and the microcosm of the individual (below). We are the universe. You are a god. And everything in the universe is made from merely just a thought, an intention to create, and everything you see is consciousness. We live in a simulation of sorts. Physicality is an illusion like I've stated in the first paragraphs. It's all imagination; we live in a dream within a dream. Separation is an illusion, we live in an interconnected energy grid or field that connects all things. Love is the only answer and the only creation.

WITCHCRAFT:Never hex anybody ever

When you are hexing someone you are affecting the entire energy grid that connects all things and everyone. It sends out shock waves of negative vibrations. It doesn't matter if you're hexing a child rapist or someone who just swore you off one day, you are negatively impacting yourself, the abuser, lowering the vibrations of the earth, and everyone in the energy grid is affected.

When we are murdering the earth, more storms erupt, and we are killing a part of our consciousness.

Lateral damage is not just with protestors but also for hexing or any revenge will cause lateral damage.

"Don't practice what you don't want to become."

Is there a hell?

Short answer:

No.

Longer answer is this:

We get life reviews with God back Home where we have to relive this lifetime through everyones else's eyes whom we interacted with here.

Every time you hurt someone intentionally, unintentionally or lacking self-awareness about it or made someone feel joy you will relive it from their POV, their emotions, their eyes, their consciousness. You literally become them. It's a self-punishment if you lived a life being a selfish mean person. If you get revenge on someone you will also have to relive the pain you caused them because revenge is always wrong as He told me. If you hurt someones feeling in a minor way you relive it as them and if hurt them in a significant way you relive it.

Nobody deserves punishment, let alone abuse.

Being able to see things from a higher self POV helps me be more empathetic and learn that I want what's best for my abusers and for myself.

You are a god and in control of your reality. The world is a strange and confusing place to live in and I can see why atheism is so appealing to people I mean I was an atheist for so many years growing up. Most of my teens I was one.

Videos I found to be cool and get you in the mood:

Timelapse of the entire universe

Zoom out from earth by nelsking26 has a cooler song

also mental health related things about thoughts vs event severity

[khiphop-discussions]

RAP:Public Ep.2 part 1

They don't talk about it here but J-Tong started the "Buckwilds" crew. It had SO many members and some of them are big names as of today. Zico, Giriboy, Lil Boi, and more. Here's a list (I'm not even sure this is a full list. I remember back in the days thinking there was so many members. I didn't even attempt to memorize lol):

Some things I didn't know but found out on namuwiki:

I don't remember this (I think this was from before I got big into khh) but he was under Just Music and then Ameoba Culture. He also dissed the Soul Connection group (Bang Yongguk's old crew?!?) and it basically destroyed their career (at least as a crew. Obviously BYG ended up becoming BYG). All of this was from before the time I became a huge khiphop fan so I can't give anymore details regarding all of this, unfortunately. I'll try to do some research some other time but I'm sure almost all resources about it are in Korean.

All spoilers from this point on

There's 60 rappers to split between 8 blocks (groups/teams in the rap:public). 60 divided by 8 is 7.5 (shout out to all the contestants who were struggling to find this out in their head cause I was too lol). The teams less than 6 will get eliminated. A team can't have more than 8. So I wonder how that will be reconciled if more than 8 people want to go to one? It seems like there will be votes.

Kaogaii is right. It is advantageous to have a smaller team at the end. 300,000 won has to be split between the members of the winning block. This means it's likely we'll see teams turn on each other towards the end. Probably why we so many many arguments/crying in the flashforwards on ep.1.

Jtong becomes the first member voted on to the block. Next is Loopy. Then, Haon. 4th Since. 5th Khundi Panda. 6th Kaogaii. Apparently, he was on a show called "Money Game" too? Can't lie, I'm suspicious of Kaogaii. He's very aware of survival shows + the commentary he's made? At this point, this is just a show/business for him. So it seems like he'll make tough, sometimes harsh, cold decisions with ease. It's like those people on the reality show who say "I didn't come here to make friends" and they end up being insufferable cause they treat everyone as disposable and will be highly manipulative if they feel it necessary.

7th. Owen...*eyeroll*. 8th. Hippie Kunda. Unexpected but I'm glad to see a lesser known rapper (and another female) make it.

Why they all vote for Hippie Kunda if no one wanted to be on her team? People didn't choose her team but Haon had lots of people who wanted to be on his. 99 Nasty Kids has a short segment. They said both will leave of one leaves and most rappers (rightfully) thought that's a bad mindset to have. Owen was like "They should have gone on a dating show"...boy...shut up. (Note: if anyone other than Owen said this, I probably would have thought it was funny lol)

Jtong chooses Damini, Loopy choose Yukon, Haon chooses Yang Kyle, Since chooses Punchnello, Kaogaii chooses Geegooin, Owem = Double Down, and Hippie Kunda = Drain K (other half of 99 Nasty Kids and also the first person to say he wants to be on her team). Khunda doesn't choose cause he doesn't want people with opposing styles. Luci Gang and someone else. He says he'll wait and recruit good/better artists. Naturally some people won't get recruited to their first team of choice. I understand his reasoning cause its hard to make opposing styles fit. However, I think he might be better off with someone more trendy since show usually come down to who has the best songs/performance as opposed to solely the best "technical" rapper.

So far block 6 is Kaogaii, Jo Gwangil, Geegooin. All talented but none all that popular despite being highly successful on smtm. I understand that. If you don't blow up after smtm, its kind of a sign that you're a but niche. Most people are probably here to max their popularity so they'd wanna go for popular teams. Plus, many probably aren't really fans of these 3 or at least are bigger fans of others. Joonie comes to the team but its clear they don't want her. They don't think she's all that good clearly. Kaogaii feels like she's not good live from what we've seen.

They wanna use Joonie basically as a shield. Make sure they have enough members but if eliminations come, get rid of her. Fucking men. I can admit, this is the most strategic thing to do here. But...fucking men...

Kaogaii is right. Why vote for him but not want to be on his team? He says he's humiliated about it. No one chose his team for multiple rounds. 7th round came. At this point Haon and another team didn't recruit for a round.

Eventually, Kohway and someone else comes.

Block 8 has Bizzy and someone else.

Block 1 (jtong), 2 (Loopy), 3 (Haon), and 7(Owen *obligatory eyeroll*) all have 8 members. 5 (khundi panda) has 6 members and then announced he'd "close" recruitment. He's got Hash Swan, Mason Home, Luci Gang (who he initially rejected instead of choosing?), Mckdaddy, and someone else.

10th round recruitment, o'domar goes to block 6 (kaogaii). Kp goes to block 8 (he initially got passed in the first round with Khundi Panda. He was the one next to Luci Gang earlier).

Last one is Leo (is this the guy signed to B.I.'s label or someone else?). Since rejects him, Khundi seems like he considers to give him the benefit of the doubt but doesn't remember his rap. Everybody is getting secondhand embarrassment and sadness for the rapper but no one tries to recruit.

Finally, Hippie Kunda chooses him. Damn, I wish they'd have done that earlier instead of drawing it out. Somehow I feel more secondhand embarrassed knowing how long it took. Now it's even MORE blatantly obvious they didn't want him but recruited purely out of pity.

But he's smiling with that big pretty smile anyway! OK Leo! Next round show them why they were dumb to not take a chance on you! Head up!

Jtong recruited all of the loud, unique people. Damini, Don Mills, Jeffrey White (okashii), Fleeky Bang, Goldbuuda, and Kang Hyuk.

Loopy: yukon, kim ga yeon, shyboiitobii, khan, xwally, nosun, and raf sandou (okashii). Seems like he wants the unknown people and up and comers. He wants to showcase something new and unique.

Haon: Yang Kyle, James An, Dommiu, Noh Yunha, BBULKUP, Reddy, Osun. Everybody is saying it's balanced. I don't have many thoughts on this team. I'll have to see how they work together.

Since: Punchnello, Kim ryul, Viin, Boi B, sky minhyuk, and cocona. This is interesting. Everybody here is a good performer.

Khundi Panda: mckdaddy, jp, mason home, luci gang, and hash swan. I'm not too hopeful about this team. I'm not really sure how they can do in this show. It's an interesting mix. They are talented but I'm not sure what type of songs they can really do. None of them are really people who make songs that you want to dance/party to or just chill to. Hash Swan can make songs like that but idk about the others. Also, for Swan he can be hit and miss in terms of songs. I like some of luci gang's songs but not a huge fan yet. I am looking forward to seeing more of her on this show.

Kaogaii thinks his team can beat any team. Joonie, Kohway, Koala, Geegooin, jo gwangil, and odomar. This isn't a horrible team. Seems like it has a mix of style and technical skill. It is very diverse.

To me, right now it seems like jtongs team is the strongest. I know some of the members are polarizing. But I've seen enough of most of them to know they can carry their part in a performance or song. If it was solo (which it might become at some points in the show) then I'd be a bit more skeptical. However, I do believe they all can do well if there's other people there for support.

I'm gonna stop here cause it's late. But I plan to continue this series throughout the week.