#so now is a great time to send in bot requests if u want!!

[honeyskiies]

i think vro forgot about the blog again…

would u believe me if i said no.......

[titilationexpress]

Sweet Dreams are Made of Screams Ch.3

You awoke with a start, gasping as you found yourself back in your bed, heart racing and sweat beading down your forehead, yet you were clearly where you had last been when you fell asleep.

Rising from your mattress, you looked down at yourself, seeing that you were back to your human self. Or...were you your human self in that...dream?

You couldn’t really remember, suddenly feeling quite tense. “God, what WAS that?” you said aloud, rubbing your temple.

You checked your phone and saw yet more requests for Starscream popping into your messages. You flopped back on the bed with a groan. It seemed that you wouldn’t be getting away from him, whether it be your dreams OR wide awake!

Yet what you had experienced…

Throughout the day, you found yourself unable to focus on anything. Whether it be at school/college/work or in your free time, the Decepticon would not leave your brain. That wasn’t really new, the constant requests for him made his presence in your mind a regular, yet this was different. You didn’t know how to explain it, but Starscream seemed to make his presence known. As in, ridiculous as it sounds, like he’s always over your shoulder, watching you.

A fictional character was somehow transcending reality and subtly manipulating you into doing his bidding. Or was it yours, as, despite the feeling of eyes on the back of your head, you have been wanting to write about him for some time.

Yet unlike before, something had changed. True, that dream you had left you rather flustered (not to mention quite wet that morning), but also...inspired? Was that the word? Well, whatever it was, it eventually managed to get you going on churning out more reader insert entries. You went through your requests, going down the list of bots and scenarios when finally, one snags your attention.

Vampire!Starscream X Reader.

Well, that was quite the challenge, wasn’t it?

Sure, you had experimented with that in the past, yet once again, Starscream seemed to haunt you everywhere you went. Just what was it that...that made him so difficult for you? Why couldn’t you just write something?!

It was then though that your mind went back to the dream and your...intimate encounter with your favorite version of the character. His words regarding your doubts, your insecurities regarding your ability to write for him….how all of it was true. And how, to overcome it, you had to cast aside your inhibitions.

You just had to “do”.

It was an hour later or so that you were still at your computer/laptop, trying to figure out where to go from here. You had the scenario in mind, now to build a plot off of it. So far, all you had was that it was in G1 (or at least some version of it at least. Hey, headcanons and AUs were serious business, you had learned), and that you somehow became Starscream’s vampire bride in the end. It was kinda stupid, but hey, G1 was known for equally crazy shit.

The only problem was where to start.

True, you knew what the end result would be, but how to get there was the question. Better yet, how the hell do robots turn into vampires?! Ugh! You couldn’t do this! You just couldn’t! You were doomed for failure! You slapped your hand against your head, trying to keep yourself from getting too frazzled. But how were you going to do this?

It was then that you heard something. Or rather, thought something.

‘Shockwave this, Shockwave that. All I ever hear about is how great Shockwave is!’

You knew that quote! Starscream’s brigade! It grew to be one of your favorites of G1! But what did that have to do with…wait a minute. Shockwave...Shockwave was left on Cybertron but was also somewhat of a scientist. And there had been references to other planets and aliens in the series (hell, Season 3 had barely anything to do with Earth at that point), and there were such things as Petro Rabbits, so why couldn’t Shockwave have a collection of live specimens to study?

And you, the Reader, we’re going to be his assistant.

From there, more and more came to you, you typing like mad as you clicked and clacked the keyboard, everything just pouring out of you at once! You were doing this, you realized. Holy shit, you were doing this! On and on you wrote, getting the outline and first part done. Then came the second, third, and so on.

And when you finally gained the courage to post them (you had not submitted them quite yet, having held back), you saw that the reception was...good.

It was good.

Sure, the first part only had a few likes so far, but it seemed to be ok. Still, you didn’t get your hopes up too high. But it wasn’t long after that you found yourself aboard the abandoned ship again, only this time, there was no one in the cell. You knew well who should’ve been in there.

“S-Starscream?” You stammered, voice echoing off the walls. It was then that you felt a servo trail it’s way up your spine, causing you to nearly leap out of your skin. Turning, you saw the amused, chortling form of your favorite Starscream, clearly pleased with himself in having given you a fright. “Don’t do that to me!” you held your chest, feeling your heart beating.

“Welcome back.” The Seeker greeted. “It looks like we’re in for another eventful night.”

Your eyes widened. “We are?” You remembered last time well. How bizarre the whole situation was...but also how good it felt. How good he felt.

“Yes, you’ve been aching for another night with me, haven’t you?” He whispered in your ear, sending a chill down your back. “Don’t bother denying it. I can see into your thoughts, remember?” His eyes then began to glow red. “And I also know what you’ve written about me recently.”

“Oh, that.” Your cheeks grew red. “Yeah, well...it was my first time writing for you, and...well, I’ve never done anything with vampires before, so…” it was then that you noticed Starscream’s eyes seeming more...red than you remembered. And...and since when did he have fangs?! “The hell?!”

Starscream only chuckled. “Don’t you remember? This was from what you had written but a short time ago.”

Oh, right. “It’s…kinda stupid though, the story I mean,” you shifted nervously. “I mean, it’s not really meant to be taken seriously.”

“But,” Starscream approached you, holding your chin gently. “You DID finally face your fears, right?” You nodded. “But yet, you’re still unsure.” Sighing, you nodded. “Well,” his optics glimmered. “We’ll have to fix that, won’t we?”

You stiffened, knowing where this was going. The environment around you changed to that of the Nemesis’ brig, you in a cell with Starscream. The same position the Reader was in near the end of the story. You knew well what was about to happen, Starscream slowly backing you up against the wall. And yet not once did you tell him to back off. True, your heart was racing, yet it wasn’t entirely out of fear. No, you feared what would come next.

“Relax, my dear.” Starscream assured you. “I’ll be gentle.” He opened his mouth, revealing pronounced canines on his upper set of dentas.

You released a heavy sigh and let it happen. The Seeker bit down on your neck and into your flesh. There was slight pain, yes, yet you could stop this anytime you wanted. You let it continue. The sting from his fangs entering you lasted only a few seconds though, as there was a rushing warmth that overtook you.

“Ah, found your courage, have you?” Starscream questioned. “Well then,” he lowered his hand to your lower regions, lightly stroking it. “Shall we take things one step further?”

Honestly, you didn’t see why not.

That night, you two had another session, the Decepticon exploring and driving you crazy with his methods, you, in turn, responding in kind. Turns out a tongue savoring his spike was one of the things you did that could make him, fittingly enough, scream. And then, you woke up, a kiss bringing out of the dream once again. More requests, and yet...and yet, this time, you felt somewhat more...confident.

You decided to try out another scenario, taking your time with this one, yet not allowing anxiety to have as much of a hold over you. And, to your surprise, this Starscream x Reader fic got good reception too! True, you still wrote for all the other Autobots and Decepticons, yet the Seeker, whatever incarnation he was, proved to be some of your most popular.

Which, in turn, led to you getting more and more visits from him.

It wasn’t each night, yet sometimes, especially when you were either in the midst of writing one, or were struggling to come up with a scenario, he would appear. Luring you into the darkness to join him, allowing yourself to cast away the chains that once held you back.

And thus, you found yourself here again. The same ship, and same voice calling you. It seemed he wished to repeat how you two had met the first time.

“I know, I know...you belo-o-ng to so-omebody ne-e-w,” you heard his voice echoing all around, you recognized the song. It was an older one, one that your mother liked, remembering it from your grandmother’s vinyl collection. What was it called? Patience and Prudence’s…

“But toni-i-ght, you belong, to me…”

Ah, yes. How...oddly fitting. You followed the Seeker’s surprisingly bearable singing, listening and taking note of which direction it was coming from. What would it be tonight, you wondered. A dive into a new situation for the Reader, aka yourself, or something new? Sometimes Screamer himself came up with ideas, of which you would do, if not just to allow him to let you finish. Though you did get your revenge mostly, there were times where you were just wanting some smooth pillow talk. Starscream frankly made you exhausted. In a good way? Honestly, even now, you weren’t sure.

And yet, here you were, about to indulge him yet again.

“My honey I know, I know,” the source of the voice was close. “With the da-a-wn, that yo-o-u, will be go-o-ne,” you saw the cell, yet Starscream wasn’t confined. You couldn’t confine him now, even if you wanted to. “But tonight…” and, if you had to be honest, “You belong,” you didn’t want to. “To me.”

[ramblingthoughtsofayoungadult]

Nev, Max, Help!-Nate Jacobs Oneshot

Requested: Yes

Warnings: aggressiveness and rudeness from Nate and a brief panic attack scene

A/N: The reader is gender neutral since the requester did not specify what they wanted and I did not want to disrespect the storyline from the show. Also, it’s a long one. 

  For once, Amy Winehouse’s low, melancholy voice did nothing to soothe my nerves as I typed what I was looking for in the designated box. “Love is a Losing Game” was definitely not the best song for the mood but I loved her voice so much; it was like a really messed up security blanket for me. My thumbs shook as I kept typing and quickly deleting my words. 

  Someone to have fun with.

  No, that’ll bring every single creep to my profile.

  Someone to watch Netflix with.

  Ew, no, they won’t want to go anywhere or do anything. 

  Someone to discuss Maya Angelou with...

  This could go one of two ways: attract a sensitive, nice person or the ultimate softboi who was really just an f-boy in a sensible cardigan.

    Okay, Y/N, just add to it.

   ...and have adventures, great conversations, and watch the best movies.

   That seemed broad enough and, potentially, weeded out all the weirdos. Patti Stanger would approve of this. I took such a deep breath that I could feel the oxygen in my feet as I pressed the green check mark. An adorable buffering sign appeared before being quickly replaced by a CONGRATULATIONS, Y/N/N, ON COMPLETING YOUR PROFILE. 

   The air came out of me slowly, like a balloon, and I tried to make myself relax as I swiped through different matches. One person was too short, the other too tall, another had way too many pictures with reptiles in his profile, and one’s bio simply read: DM and you’ll find out. 

  Serial killer much?

  “That’s part of your problem, Y/N,” Jules had chastised me a few day prior.

 “What do you mean by ‘part’?” I’d replied.

 “Well, for one, you barely leave the house anymore unless I drag you out,” Jules argued.

  “I’m busy,” I’d defended. 

  “Rewatching Breaking Bad for the eighth time does not count as being busy. Plus, you’re so picky.”

  “Am not!” 

  “You said you’d only do DiCaprio in his Great Gatsby days,” Rue had added.

  “Did you see him in that suit?” 

  Jules then shrugged. “All I’m saying is if you aren’t careful, you will end up all alone.”

  “That’s not true, Y/N might get cats.” 

  That conversation had haunted me since and had driven me to making a dating profile after the required Saturday night family dinner. While my parents and brother were downstairs watching a movie, I was holed up in my room, cringing and regretting accepting any chat requests. 

   Half an hour on the app caused the images of various male genitalia to be burned into my mind. I would need my brain soaked in holy water for it to be erased. I huffed and kept scrolling, vainly hoping and wishing for a decent guy to pop up on my radar.

  Maybe Jules and Rue were wrong. Maybe I had all the right in the world to be picky, I thought harshly to myself. 

  I dropped my phone on my nightstand and flopped against my pillows as Me and Mr. Jones began playing. I sighed and felt myself being lulled into the comforting abyss Amy created. 

   Ding!

   I jumped out and glared at the source of the noise. Another chat request, another picture to ruin my young brain? 

  “Be positive, Y/N, this might be good,” I stated as I grabbed the phone. 

  Tyler wants to chat!

   I frowned and opened up the app, only to be met with the most sculpted six-pack I had ever seen. My heart began banging against my chest and my thumbs fumbled for a moment to answer the chat request. 

  Whoosh. 

  My stomach dropped as I stared at my first chat to Tyler: Shg.ismtle

  I’m. Going. To. Die. Alone.

  I quickly typed: Please ignore that, I’m so sorry!

  Seconds later, my phone dinged.

  Tyler: Really? I thought you were trying to send me a secret code and I liked that we were that cool already.

  This was not real, this could not be happening. Tyler had to be a bot, that was why he didn’t show his face in his profile. Bots were supposed to have a hard time recognizing and creating faces, right? 

   But, on the off chance Tyler was real, it would have been rude to leave the conversation so abruptly? 

   Y/N: Who knows? Maybe it was a secret code and I’m just testing you.

   Tyler: Ok, let me guess what it means.

   Tyler: Hi? 

   Y/N: Haha, you really thought I’d use such a simple code as a first message?

   Tyler: It’s my bad for underestimating u. I should have known u were smarter since you read Maya Angelou.

  Y/N: U a fan? 

  Tyler: “You can’t use up creativity. The more you use, the more you have.” 

  He knows Angelou? He could have Googled a quote though. Still, it’s a good quote to use if he had Googled it.

   Y/N: Nice, but, doesn’t get u out of the guessing game.

   As Tyler helplessly guessed wrong for several minutes, I couldn’t stop myself from smiling. I used to think online dating was a last resort or a breeding ground for predators. But, maybe there were decent people looking for something (or someone) meaningful after all. 

  Tyler: I give up, you’re really good. 

  Y/N: Thx. But, I can tell you what I meant to say. 

  Tyler: The suspense is srsly kiilling me. 

  Y/N: I meant 2 say hey.

  Tyler: I guessed that!

   Y/N: No, u guessed ‘hi’, there’s a difference.

  Tyler: C’mon, barely.

   For the rest of the night, Tyler and I chatted. He told me that he plays baseball at a school across town and he doesn’t like anyone around there. He liked John Mulaney stand-up, lemon bars, going to the gym, hanging out with his friends, and reading good books. He was an only child and his parents tended to spoil him. I told him about my friends and how I liked being on the swim team at my school as well as the different YouTubers and books I enjoyed. When I finally fell asleep, I dreamed of talking to him. 

   On Monday, Jules and Rue were hanging out outside the school as other people either headed to class or relaxed on the lawn. I could not stop my feet from bouncing as I walked up to them.

   “...and that is why Sailor Mercury is the most underrated character of the whole show,” Jules affrimed. 

   Rue seemed halfway interested as her head nodded slowly underneath the hood of her burgundy hoodie. “Cool, all I asked was who’s your favorite but, cool.” 

   Jules rolled her eyes playfully and straightened up when she saw me. “Hey, Y/N, nice shirt.” 

  “Thanks.” I wore a sky blue tie dye shirt with ripped jeans and white Converse.

  Rue leaned forward and squinted at me. “You’re not wearing black, something’s wrong.” 

  “Nothing’s wrong, she’s obviously been influenced by me!” Jules teased as she wrapped a slim arm around my shoulders.

  “Yeah, you can only hang out with this literal rainbow human so long before she starts influencing your outfit choices.”

  We started heading inside, which was really just Jules and me dragging Rue into the building.

   “But I don’t wanna be here. It’s so stupid that I have to wait six more months before I can legally decide where I spend my time,” Rue muttered.

  “It’s fine, you have us!” Jules insisted.

   “Yup!” I agreed.

  “Hey, Y/N, Rue, Jules!” Cassie greeted as she sidled up next to me. 

  We all greeted her.

  “Have a good weekend?” Rue asked. 

  “Yeah, there was this great party that Nick Davis threw. I swear, everyone there was on acid.” Cassie stopped herself and bit her bottom lip. “Sorry---” 

   Rue shook her head. “It’s fine.”

  “How were yours?” Cassie asked as we continued to our lockers. 

  “Fine,” Jules said.

  Rue shrugged in response.

  I opened my mouth to reply when my phone beeped and I wrestled it out of my pocket. 

  Tyler: Is it 2 late 4 a good morning text? 

  I smiled. 

  “You’re so cheesy,” I muttered under my breath. 

  “Who’s that?” Cassie asked, peeking over my shoulder.

   I jumped and cradled my phone to my chest like it was my child. “No one.” 

   Jules pulled open her locker and cocked a bleached eyebrow. “‘No one’ does not cause huge smiles like that!” She jabbed a sparkly-manicured finger at me. 

  “Yeah, show us,” Rue said. “We are your friends.” 

  “It’s nothing,” I insisted as I weaved around them. 

  I pushed myself against my locker and managed to open it with my free hand. Rue was on one side of me and Cassie was on the other. 

  “Is it a boy?” Cassie sang.

  “Or a girl?” Rue questioned.

  “It’s none of your business,” I gritted out as I grabbed my necessary books. 

  As I shuffled the books in my arms, Jules came from behind and slipped my phone away from me. I gasped, whirled around, and watched as Rue tried to look at the phone while Cassie playfully blocked me.

  “Guys, this is not cool! This is such a serious invasion of privacy,” I argued as I tried to move around Cassie.

  “We’re besties, there’s no such thing as privacy!” Jules retorted. 

  “Wow, Y/N, these are so----” Jules cut Rue off.

  “Adorable!” Jules squealed and turned to face me.

  Cassie took the opportunity to glance at my phone and she smiled. “Aw, this Tyler guy sounds so sweet.” 

  I snatched my phone from Jules. “Well, now you know. Can we please go to class now?” 

  As the other girls grabbed their things from their lockers, I got out my phone to reply to Tyler.

  Y/N: It’s never too late...until noon technically.

   Somehow, I started wandering away from the girls until I ran into someone. I tried to jump away, but they grabbed me by the forearms.

  “I am so sorry, I should have looked where I was going---” I stopped speaking when I recognized Nate’s direct gaze on me. I was pretty tall but I always felt like he could throw me into the lockers if he wanted to.

  “Watch it, Y/N,” he muttered. 

  “Nate, let go of them,” Maddy chided, her hand resting against one of his arms. 

  She seemed to have the magic touch because he relaxed and I joined my friends. As the couple continued down the hallway, I couldn’t help but admire them. In a very messed up way, they worked. Kat had told me only a little about what Nate would do whenever Maddy upset him and I felt so bad for her, angry at him, and then conflicted. Nate just had to have that stereotypical amazing all-American look.

  “You okay, Y/N?” Cassie asked.

  “Yeah, is it weird that I can still feel his eyes on me even when he’s not looking?” I asked. 

  “No, his need for dominance permeates everyone’s sense of autonomy,” Rue assured.

  “Nice,” Jules said. 

  “And scary accurate,” Cassie added. 

  Jule looped her arm with mine and steered us in the direction of our first classes. “Anyway, if he tries anything, I’m sure Tyler would gladly kick his butt for you.” 

   Throughout the day, Tyler and I chatted and I even had to get creative with responding. In English, I kept my head down during quiet reading time and made sure my phone was positioned just right in my lap. During geometry, I told Mrs. Packer that I was having some digestive issues and spent most of the class outside the bathroom, texting Tyler. At lunch, I could barely focus on my friends’ conversation.

   “Hello, Earth to Y/N?” Lexi waved her hand in front of my face and I blinked.

   “Sorry, I was----”

   “Texting her boooyfriiiend,” Jules sang.

   “He’s not my boyfriend, we’re just talking.” I started poking at my sandwich. “What did I miss?” 

  “Oh, nothing, just the fact that I nearly blew up the school during chem,” Cassie said. 

  “Magnesium chloride isn’t an explosive,” Lexi argued. 

  “Well, the tube overflowed and everyone was freaking out,” Cassie argued.

  “Yeah, because magnesium chloride can have bad side effects,” Lexi continued.

   “I wonder what would happen if the school exploded and we weren’t all here? Would they have to give us our diplomas?” I thought outloud.

  “Ooh, and I could go to fashion school early!” Jules cheered. 

  “I’d be happy not coming here anymore,” Rue admitted. 

  It was quiet for a moment as we all ate but that quiet was broken when Maddy yelled.

  “WHO ARE YOU TEXTING?”

  I couldn’t help myself but look. Maddy was standing behind Nate, who was sitting with his teammates at the center table. Bebe and Kat flanked Maddy a little behind. Everyone stared at them. Nate’s jaw tightened. 

  “Maddy, calm down,” his relaxed, controlled voice nearly echoed in the silent cafeteria. 

  “DON’T TELL ME TO CALM DOWN! YOU’VE BEEN ON YOUR PHONE ALL DAY!” she snapped. 

  “Maddy---” 

  “ARE YOU TEXTING OTHER GIRLS?” Maddy shouted.

  “Can we talk about this somewhere else?” Nate asked. 

  Maddy sighed. “Are you gonna let me see your phone?”

  “Maddy, we need to talk.” 

  “Don’t talk to me again.” 

  Before Nate could respond, Maddy dumped the contents of her lunch tray over his head and threw the tray aside. Kat and Bebe followed her as she strutted out of the cafeteria amid the shocked gasps. 

   “I’m gonna go check on her,” Cassie whispered.

  We all nodded and she quietly exited the room. As I stared at Nate, the supposed king of the school, drenched in soggy salad and fat-free milk, I wondered why he could never stay broken up with Maddy. Their relationship was not just toxic, it was volatile. Their breakups were always public and outrageous, but they always ended up back together. No one questioned it either. I never understood why people could continue to choose relationship they knew was bad over pursuing something new. I told Tyler as much that night. 

   Y/N: It’s like those dogs that get killed by electric fences because they keep walking into them.

  Tyler: U have a good point, but, that couple’s relationship is more complicated than u think. 

  Y/N: Probably, but, it doesn’t look that way. They hurt each other a lot.

  Tyler: How do u know? 

   Y/N: Bc I’ve seen it. I don’t mean 2 b judgy, but, I could never be in a relationship like that. 

  Tyler: Well, I don’t think anyone would b if they knew it would b bad. 

  Y/N: Good point. But, why would they get back together so much? 

  Tyler: Idk them, but, it could b bc it’s familiar and it’s what they know.

  Y/N: Still, it’s messed up.

 Tyler: Yeah, but I don’t wanna talk abt them anymore.

 Y/N: K, what do u wanna talk abt? 

  A few seconds later, Tyler sent me a picture so graphically beautiful that I was convinced I passed out.

 The next day, I showed Rue and Jules the picture during break time.

 “Holy crap!” Jules took my phone and leaned into it for closer inspection. 

 “Tyler is packing,” Rue agreed. 

  Jules slid my phone back to me. “You haven’t replied to him?”    “No, and he hasn’t talked to me at all today.”

  “He’s probably expecting a reply that’s similar to what he sent,” Rue said.

  My face warmed up. “I can’t send him nudes,” I hissed.

  “Why not? It’s like the greeting cards of our generation,” Jules stated.

  “Really? You’d send your grandparents a greeting card of your naked body?” I replied sarcastically.

  “Relax, if you’re uncomfortable, we can help you,” Jules assured.

  “We can?” Rue asked.

  “We can.” Jules gave her a look and Rue relaxed. 

  “It’s still weird, but, I guess you guys can come over after school.”

  “Sweet! Your mom still bakes cookies for you after school, right?” Jules asked.

  I nodded.

  “She might stop once she learns her darling favorite older child is sending nudes,” Rue snorted as she spoke.

  I recoiled in my seat, taking a second to bask in the sun’s warmth. “Don’t remind me.” 

  After swim practice, once my teammates left the locker room, I eyed my naked form in the mirror. I had nothing to be ashamed of, really, thanks to all the swimming, but, I just felt weird being naked in front of people. There was something so vulnerable about it, like, being on display in a museum or lying on a cold surgery table. But, online dating was supposed to get me out of my comfort zone and I’d found someone who’d made me feel comfortable enough to do it. With this resolve, I changed into a hoodie and some sweatpants and left the school. It was dusk and I typically walked home after practice since it wasn’t far. Plus, I’d told Jules and Rue to just go to my house after school. 

  The late breeze rippled past me and I dug my hands into my pants’ pockets as I started walking towards the parking lot. There was barely anyone around, except stoners hotboxing their cars, some couples making out, and dance team members and football players getting out of practice.

  I kept my head down as I maneuvered around the few cars and people around. It felt like someone could spot what I was about to do once I got home and it was nervewracking. All I had to do was get home, let Jules make me look even better, take these pictures, and never thinking of it again.

   “Something on your mind, Y/N?” Nate called.

   I froze and snapped my head up to look at him. He was leaning against his truck, looking like a model for Ford in only a tshirt and jeans. Ford should hire him. 

   “No, not really,” I said. 

   I started to side step the truck, eyeing the sidewalk that was only a few yards away as though it was a lifeline. 

  “Get in,” Nate ordered.

  I paused and looked at him. “Excuse me?” 

  “I see you walking home all the time, let me do you a favor, one athlete to another.” Nate was about halfway in the driver’s seat of the car and all I could do was stare.

  “We’ve...never really talked before,” I stated. 

  “We can talk during the drive.” 

   I stepped back and my eyes flittered around, like the best decision would hit me in the face. Then, I saw Maddy across the lot. She was standing with a couple of dance team girls, including Cassie. She stared me down as though daring me to do it. I glanced from her to Nate, who started the engine loudly. 

   I quickly climbed into the passenger’s seat and stared into Maddy’s reflection in the rearview mirror as he pulled out of the parking lot. 

  “How do you know where I live?” I asked.

  “You forgot that I gave you a ride before?” Nate asked.

  “When?” 

  “After Cassie’s sweet sixteen. You blacked out, your friends were panicking, and I offered to take you home. For some reason, you remembered your address,” Nate recalled.

  “Oh, thanks?” 

  “Sure.” 

  We pulled up to my house a few minutes later, Lil Wayne bragging about his conquests filling the quiet. I hopped out of the truck and grabbed my bag. 

  “Thanks for the ride, this one, I mean, I owe you,” I said.

  “Yeah, see you around, Y/N.” 

  I closed the door and headed inside.

  “I’m home!” I called.

  My mom poked her head out from the kitchen. “Y/N, how was school and practice?” 

  “Fine.” 

  “Was that Nate Jacobs outside?” 

  I hesitated. 

  How did she know what Nate’s truck looked like?  “Yeah, he gave me a ride today.” 

  “Aw, isn’t that sweet? Rue and Jules are waiting for you in your room. They took the cookies with them.”  

  I nodded and went to my room. As soon as I walked in, they bombarded me with questions.

  “Why did Nate give you a ride?” Rue asked.

  “What did you guys talk about?” Jules inquired. 

  “Don’t you hate him?” 

  “He’s kind of a dick, but, unfortunately, super good looking.”

  “Did Maddy see?” 

  “Do you think she’s gonna kill you?” 

  “Guys, I don’t know but I do know that if you do not take amazing pictures of me with no clothes on soon, I will delete my entire profile,” I interrupted. 

  They both nodded. 

  “But, we will ask for details later,” Jules insisted.

  “Okay, but, please give me a cookie, I’ll need it to get through this.” 

  Rue extended the plate towards me and I bit into the melty goodness as Jules began doing my makeup. It was simple, only bringing out my best features. I made them both turn around as I undressed. Once I had, Jules encouraged me.

  “You look amazing, I would be shocked if he didn’t jizz in his pants,” Jules said.

  “Lower your voice, Y/B/N can only play Five Nights at Freddy’s so loud,” I hissed.

  Jules held her hands up and Rue direct me to lay on the bed, my phone held up in front of her.

  “Okay, look sexy,” Rue said.

  I tried to smolder, but, by their expressions, I did not achieve it.

  “No, like, pout your lips, like, you just heard that TheOdd1sOut is not uploading for a month,” Jules directed.

  “And give the camera bedroom eyes, you know, as though it’s Tyler.”

  “Okay.”    After a few pictures, I slowly got the hang of it and even started posing a little naturally.

  “Oh my gosh, Tyra is shook!” Jules cheered. 

 “Yeah, these are pretty good if I do say so myself.” Rue handed me my phone and I flipped through the pictures. 

  She was a talented photogrpaher and I joked that maybe she should go professional.

  “Yeah, I’m sure I’d have a nice clientele.” 

  I laughed as I changed back into my hoodie and sweatpants. “Okay, help me pick one to send.” 

  Jules took my phone and she and Rue began scrolling.

  “No, the lighting’s off in this one,” Jules muttered.

  “No, it’s never off in any of these,” Rue argued. 

  “I’m not shading your talent, I’m just trying to find the best thing for Y/N to send Tyler.” 

  After a little more bickering, we all agreed on the picture and I sent it to Tyler.

  “Should I follow it up with something?” I asked.

  “Maybe say ‘Wrong person’? Guys want what other guys want,” Jules suggested.

  “Or say ‘Sorry for the late reply’,” Rue added.

  “I’ll go with Rue’s, sorry, Jules.” 

  Jules shrugged. 

  I sent everything off and my friends and I watched as Tyler typed a response.

  Tyler: It was worth the wait ;).

  We squealed so loud that my mom yelled for us to keep it down. We apologized as we descended into a fit of giggles. Through it all, I could not help but feel so bouncy and light all over. Was I...falling for this total stranger? 

  “What do you think he looks like?” Jules asked during lunch later that week.

  I shrugged. “It’s different every day, if that makes sense.” 

  “I guess that’s the nice thing about interacting with someone who doesn’t show their face,” Jules thought outloud. 

  “How do you see him now?” Lexi asked. 

  I sighed. “Right now, I think he’s tall, six feet at least. He’s got a mix of blonde and brown hair like a surfer because it’s lightened from all the time he’s spent in the sun. He has green eyes, freckles, and he dresses well.” 

  “Sounds amazing,” Jules said as she rest her chin in her hand. 

  Rue nodded slowly. “You’re not nervous or anything?” 

  “No, this is so cheesy, but, I feel like I know him, you know? He’s so easy to talk to and has so much to say.”

  “Y/N’s blushing,” Jules teased. “Do you love him?” 

  “I really, really, really, like him.” 

  “Do you think you’ll meet soon?” Lexi asked.

  I shrugged. “I don’t know, neither of us has brought it up.”

  “Well, it just matters that you’re comfortable, okay?” Rue said.

  “Okay.” 

  If I was honest, I did not know if I wanted to meet Tyler. I knew that I liked him more than I liked anyone before, but, there was something strange about breaking this wall the internet provided us. It was freer to talk on the internet than it was in person. What if I said something stupid in front of him? What if he thought that I looked different in person? What if he looked different in person? 

  I managed to keep these thoughts at bay for the rest of the day until I got home. Post-dinner had been officially declared Talk to Tyler Time. None of my family knew what I was doing besides blasting Amy Winehouse in my room for about an hour. My laugh nearly overpowered her high note in “Best Friends, Right?”. I had to blink away my happy tears as I replied to him. 

  Y/N: That did not happen!  Tyler: Yes it did! Do u want 2 c the scar????

 Y/N: No, I think I’m good.

 I wiped away my tears and settled under the covers. I wondered if his friends would agree that Tyler gets into some weird situations as well. Just as I started typing, Tyler beat me.

 Tyler: I want 2 meet u.

 The speed that I launched my phone away from me almost shocked me more than the text.

  Almost.

  My heartbeat thrummed in my ears. This was it, I knew I couldn’t avoid him much longer, but, I felt like I couldn’t move. All I could do was stare at my phone like it was the most offensive object in the world. Slowly, I regained mobility and grabbed my phone. I took a deep breath.

  “Take a chance, Y/L/N,” I whispered.

  Y/N: When and where?

    “You’re meeting him tonight?” Jules squealed the next day.

  I hushed her as people in the hallway paused to look at us. “Not so loud.”   “But this is so exciting. Please let me help you decide what to wear,” Jules pleaded with a pout. 

  “Sure,” I said. 

  Jules hugged me. “This is going to be so fun. I won’t go crazy with glitter since this is the first time you’re meeting this guy.” 

 “Thanks?” 

 “Do your parents know?” Rue asked.

 “No,” I replied as I slowly pulled away from Jules. “They’re coming Senior Night tonight, though. and I’m going to meet him at Mercy Park an hour before it ends.” 

 “Are you sure you even want to do this? I know that Jules and I tease you about your love life, but, this is risky,” Rue said. 

 “You weren’t saying that when you were helping me with those pictures the other day,” I shot back.

  “That was different. You’re...you’re actually meeting him now and he could be a psychopath or a sociopath or, just, a creepy old guy who likes to look at teenagers!” Rue insisted.

  “Rue, relax, everything’s going to be fine.”

  “You don’t know that!” She turned on her heel and hurried into the bathroom with Jules and I on her tail. 

  When we entered, Rue was leaning against the wall, panting and staring up at the ceiling. Jules and I approached her slowly as the girls who were in the bathroom quickly filed out. 

  “Rue, slow down your breathing,” I said slowly.

  “I...I can’t. You-you could get hurt or something and-and I would know about it an-and I-I couldn’t live with that!” Tears burst from her eyes as Rue began pacing and Jules and I were close but gave her room. 

  “Rue, Y/N is going to be okay, we both know what time she’ll be at the park. If anything happens, we’ll know the area she could be in,” Jules assured her.

  Rue shook her head and stopped in her tracks. Then, she looked between us helplessly before bowing her head and sobbing. Jules and I carefully hugged her and let her cry.

  “I’m sorry that I’m scared and I care about you and I don’t want you to get hurt,” Rue mumbled into my shirt.

  “It’s okay, I appreciate it. I really want to meet Tyler, though, and, I promise I will let you know if something happens, okay?” 

  Rue nodded and sniffled.

   It took Jules about an hour to make me look amazing. I had no idea my hair could be so fluffy and put together until she was done with it. She used eyeliner to make eyes look bigger and rounder and added sparkly lip gloss to make my lips look plumper. After she contoured and highlighted the best places she deemed that her work was done. My outfit, a fitted forest green long-sleeve shirt and fitted black pants with Jadons, was also approved by her.

  “Tell me everything later!” she insisted.

  Rue couldn’t join us since she had “prior commitments” but I texted her that I would let her know when I head to the park and when I leave. My nerves didn’t let me focus on the soccer game my parents insisted I joined them and my brother at. I couldn’t care less that the forward on one team got a yellow card or that the goalie on the other team made illegal blocks. I was practically buzzing with excitement and fear so much that I had to give my pretzel to Y/B/N. Finally, the third quarter arrived and I told my parents that I would meet them at home since I’d promised Lexi that I would help her with some homework. 

  Lexi wouldn’t mind being used for a lie this one time; it was an emergency.

  I tried to practice some calming deep breaths as I walked over to the park. The dark night sky provided a little bit of comfort to my walk. I wondered how different Tyler would look from the picture in my mind. I wondered if he thought I would look any different. Maybe (hopefully) it wouldn’t matter to either of us.

  Finally, I reached the park. It was empty, save for the oak trees scattered throughout the lush green scenery that seemed mysterious under the mooonlight. A few benches and wooden tables were around as well, but, Tyler and I had agreed to meet at the fountain which was further in the park. The breathing exercises had to have helped because I felt much more relaxed and I hoped that everything would go all right. 

   When I got to the fountain, there was a tall person facing it. All I could make out were dark clothes and broad shoulders. I took another deep breath and kept walking.

  “This is a nice spot, you have good taste,” I commented. 

  “I could say the same for you.” I stopped in my tracks as Nate slowly turned to face me. His face was unreadable but his eyes stayed on me. 

  “What? Wh-where’s Tyler?” I asked, my voice already hoarse. 

  Nate glanced down at his shoes. “I’m sorry, I didn’t know how else to talk to you.” 

  I shook my head. “No.” My vision got blurry but I could tell that Nate was looking up at me now. 

  “Just let me explain,” he requested softly. 

  He took a step towards me and I took two steps back .

 “I don’t wanna hear it. This....this is some sick joke to you or something?” 

 “No, never, Y/N, just listen to me.” 

 “I don’t want to!” The tears rolled down my cheeks and I swiped at them so hard that I thought I scratched myself. At least I could feel something because my heart felt numb. “You catfished me!” 

  “I just wanted to talk to you, I really do like you, Y/N. Tyler and I are the same, just different names,” Nate insisted, coming closer.

  For some reason, I didn’t move. I didn’t know if it was from emotional exhaustion or stress, but, I let him approach me. I kept shaking my head. 

  “No,” I hiccuped. 

  “I wanted to meet you tonight because I was tired of lying. I want to figure this, us, out,” Nate said.

  I sniffed. “Us?” 

  At that moment, I could actually see his face and Nate seemed so hopeful. There was a slight smile on his lips and his eyes seemed light for once. Maybe he wanted there to be an “us”. Maybe, despite all logic, he wanted to talk to me seriously and could not do it offline because of his reputation. Maybe, he was over the on-again-off-again situation with Maddy. Maybe, this was my chance, our chance.

  I wiped my face again, mentally cringing at how upset Jules would be for my ruining her masterpiece. 

  “Yeah, us.” Nate stepped closer to me, gently wrapped his arms around my waist, and pulled me into his chest.

  Gradually, my muscles relaxed and I relished in the feeling of his strong upper body and his warmth. Then, I began to feel pressure on my waist and gasped as it intensified. 

  “Nate, you’re...squeezing...too hard,” I rasped out. 

  And he started laughing, no, cackling. As he laughed, his grip tightened and I continued gasping and clawing at everything I could. 

  “Nate...stop!” 

  But he kept laughing and squeezing. When he finally released me, I looked up and saw nothing behind his eyes. Everything in me told me to run, but, I knew he could have easily caught up to me.

  “I really thought you were smarter than that, Y/N. C’mon, you couldn’t honestly think that I would do all this to be with you,” he sneered.

  “So why do it then?” I asked, my voice so small that I could have kicked myself for it. 

  Nate sighed and folded his arms. “Because you made it so easy and, to ask for a favor.” 

  “What? That makes no sense,” I argued. “I told you I owed you one that day you gave me a ride!” 

  “Yeah, well, I needed to make sure that you were available when I needed you.” 

  “Whatever, screw you,” I hissed as I pivoted on my heel. 

  “Too late for you, you’re already screwed.” Nate pulled out a folder from inside his jacket pocket. “Remember those special pictures you sent to Tyler? Well, they count as distribution of child pornography, which has a hefty fine and sentence.” 

   My mouth opened and closed several times before I faced him and responded. “But...but you held them, doesn’t that count towards possession? And, you’re extorting me!” 

  Nate glowered at me and stormed over. “Heresay, no solid evidence for your case. Plus, I’m a Jacobs, so, who are you kidding?” 

   I felt so sick to my stomach that I could have thrown up, fainted, or cried at that moment. This was not real, this could not be real.

   “What do you want?” I asked.

   “Like I said, just be available when I need you.” 

  “Fine.” 

  “Sorry, what was that?” He gripped my chin his hand and forced me to look up at him.

  “Okay,” I said softly.

  “Hmm.” His eyes scanned my face before he released me. “And if I ever hear you judging my relationship with Maddy again, these pictures are going to be the least of your concern.” 

  I nodded weakly, regretting every single thing I ever told him. Nate Jacobs was truly the devil. He wandered off into the night like a centurion leaving a victorious battle. It seemed like he always won. 

  I managed not to start crying until I was on the empty sidewalk. No, I sobbed so bad that my throat went dry. 

  How could I have been so stupid? I should have known it was him that day Maddy yelled at him for texting all day. 

  Stupid, stupid, stupid!

  My sobs continued as I grabbed my phone and texted Rue. 

  Y/N: U were right. 

[imagining-in-the-margins]

Anon Asks ! (+one NSFW one below)

1. Awe, you're not selfish. I completely understand why you feel left out. Unfortunately, people already read my SFW stuff at such a lower rate that I'm afraid a SFW Series would totally bomb. Unless I was extremely motivated, I don't see myself being able to do it.

Do me a favor and send me another Anon about SFW Series recommendations. I just asked my Discord, but I want to give them some time to respond!

2. You are so wonderful. Thank you for sending me such a lovely message not once, but twice. I appreciate you taking your time to read my work and then go even further and tell me about it.

I hope you have the best day ever 😭

3. They've been friends since they were teenagers! Las Vegas is a surprisingly small place, all things considered. They promised him back then they would let him direct a music video if they ever made it big. It's very cute.

4. Who, me? Naaah, I'm just a worm 😉 (does anyone recognize this reference? or do I just look silly?)

5. I'm assuming this is about Quid Pro Quo (although it could also be about Fuzzy Pants, lol), and I'm so happy you think so! I was worried it'd be a bit too niche, but it's great to see people enjoying it 🤗

6. I don't think I'll be able to swing a whole series of that, but I do have a couple Virgin Post-Prison Spencer WIPs. I also plan on writing a Virgin Spencer mini-series after TB&TB (called Centerfold), but it takes place when he's in graduate school/ten years later.

7. Ah, you are so sweet. And yes, I have been writing quite a lot of that lanky fucker, huh... The truth is, my answer is very simple and can be summed up in a very funny way. How do I keep writing him?

✨ a u t i s m ✨

I can honestly say I have never, ever bored myself out of anything. Other things just became more interesting for a little while. Matthew was one of my first ever special interests as a young teen. I cycle through mine for periods of a couple years at a time (I popped in here hot off my Naruto re-emergence).

Whereas a lot of people go through interests in much shorter bursts (especially those with ADHD), autistic people have a tendency to fixate for much, much longer periods. There is nothing wrong with you, we are just different ☺️

I use the "Other" MGG characters to grant myself the freedom to do other things. I honestly really wanted this to be a multi-fandom blog, but I was immediately inundated with Spencer requests that never stopped.

Maybe one day I'll introduce another obsession, but I don't see it in my immediate future. I usually have a pretty good warning that I'm slipping out of the fandom. Right now I'm mostly just sad people are leaving. I'm still going strong though, lmao!

8. I'm a firm believer in the idea that Laziness Does Not Exist, but I totally understand. You're actually describing something experienced by ALL writers, although having ADHD will no doubt exacerbate the problems. I do not have ADHD, but the good news is that ADHD has a large number of treatment options (both pharmaceutical and otherwise).

I think you can talk to a trusted adult about it if you'd like. I know very little about the diagnostic process of ADHD, but I do know that it's significantly more straightforward than most autistic testing. A number of my friends got a diagnosis in less than a month (granted, they are all adults, and their parents were willing to cooperate).

A diagnosis won't make your parents (or anyone else) believe you, though. It's just one of those things you have to learn to deal with. But with the case of ADHD specifically, because there are pharmaceutical treatments, it might be worth it. I personally absolutely abhor stimulants (and am also medically contraindicated). But I'm autistic, so they don't help me, lol!

As for being more motivated generally, I think a lot of it is literally just forcing yourself to do it. You have to get over this idea of writing it perfect and just start writing SOMETHING, even if it's garbage. You can always edit it.

Fanfiction is so much easier with this because it doesn't have to be perfect, or even good (lol). It's just for fun! It's not an easy thing to do, but it is so rewarding. I know a lot of people in my Discord like utilizing our Writer Bot to have writing "sprints" where you are timed and see how many words you can write in short bursts.

Not how I function, but it works for some people! We are all different, and that's what makes us wonderful 🥰

9. Awwwe, I have so many Hozier songs on their playlist! I listen to him whenever I need general inspiration. Like most basic white bitches, I do love me some Hozier. Also, I am honored.

NSFW WARNING, MINORS DNI

Hahah, good news is I have a number of fics about that premise! H2M, Different Kind of Daddy, Big Bad Wolf, Protege, sections of the NSFW Alphabet, Thimble of Honey, aaand... Spoiled. I think that's most of them.

It will come up VERY briefly in TB&TB. I'm positive I have other Spencer WIPs that include it, but I couldn't tell you which ones. It's requested of me very often 😅 which is fine, it is a kink I have IRL!

I agree, though. It makes me feel things.

[tinycrow]

I don’t believe in miracles

Chapter 1: This secret

She was speeding down the highway, a plain black vehicle, weaving around traffic where she safely could. In the driver’s seat, a woman with green eyes and messy black hair pulled back into a tight braid flickered in and out of reality minutely before stabilizing with a grimace. Bouncing excitably in the passenger seat was, unmistakably, a baby of a non-human race. Their fragile protoform was bare for the world to see with no armour to speak of. The seatbelt clenched tighter around the precious bundle of metal and youth, a gentle reprimand emanating from all around them. The young one stilled, but their little helm turned curiously to look back through the rear window.

From around several cars’ worth of space behind them, a silver car quickly approached. They were stalled by the traffic between them, for now.

~ Ray to Shawn. I’ve got someone on my tail. Evacuate through the ground bridge. I don’t want anyone hurt if I end up having to fight. ~

~ Shawn here. Gotcha, sunshine. Just come home, both of you. ~

The silent communication ended, and her engine revved as she sped up. An exit was coming up, and she wanted to give as little indication as possible as to her intentions. Her sensors let her know that the silver car was almost directly behind her now, doggedly matching her lane for lane. She wondered if it would try to run her off the road.

At the last possible second, she swerved onto the exit ramp, barely missing the barrier. She knew the other car would be forced to take the next exit or risk an accident to double back. In comparison to the other car, she wasn’t the greatest driver, but she was fiercely protective and maybe a tad reckless. Her passenger chirped in excitement, unaware of the danger they were in.

The woman’s brow wrinkled as she flickered in and out again. Not relaxing in the slightest, but not wanting to crash, she reluctantly slowed down. She may not see her pursuer anymore, but she wouldn’t put it past them to surprise her. She decided to take a roundabout way to the warehouse that was her target destination.

Perhaps luck was on her side because she made it without incident. Tapping into the controller that opened the door, she wheeled herself in and closed the door. She then encoded a request to the Gate Room. Soon, a portal opened in midair toward the back of the room. The dark vehicle hurried through with her enclosed passenger.

==

:: Unknown Location ::

Once on the other side, the vehicle visibly sagged on its axels in relief. The woman in the driver’s seat blinked out of existence.

“Sunshine! You made it!” A man with long hair pulled back called from a nearby console. With a few more presses of his fingers to the on-screen keyboard, the portal closed behind her, and a loud humming from a nearby machine quieted.

The sound of shifting metal and displaced air filled the quiet, and the black car stood up. In its place was a feminine figure of softly curved metal and dark armour plating. Two black door-wings twitched anxiously behind her. Her pedes daintily stepped forward with the youthful bundle now held in her arms.

“Shawn,” she greeted the smiling human. The ‘baby’ chirred in curiosity at the man, though she held them firmly.

The man turned from the console, hands on his hips and no visible fear on his features. Kneeling her much larger form down, she let the curious bundle meet the man.

“And that must be our new kid,” he said gently, “Cute fella’. Hey there, little guy. I’m Shawn Jenkins. Everyone calls me Shawn, except for… well, you’ll meet them later.”

The young one simply stared for a second, and then chirped happily, reaching small hands to touch him. The large, metal woman muttered a “No touchy,” and quickly stood up again. The looks of disappointment from both the baby and the man caused her to laugh.

“I can’t tell who’s more disappointed, you or the kid.”

She rocked said kid slowly, smiling down at her young one apologetically. “Sorry, my little one. Not until I’m sure that you’ve learnt to be gentle with humans.”

“I don’t mind. I’m not made out of glass, y’ know.”

“I know, Shawn. However, I don’t let any of my youngest interact with humans until they’ve gotten more control of their motor functions, just as a general rule. The cleanup is messy.”

It was a topic that had been discussed before, but no one wanted to argue with ‘mama bear’. Instead, Shawn shrugged, and the two headed toward the doors. A set of doors matching the estimated max heights of each species was available, though Shawn went toward the big door. They exited the building into a small but bustling community.

The buildings were big, but not reaching the heights of skyscrapers. This tight-knit community was sectioned into roughly three parts around a central power source, all within a tall dome-shaped forcefield protecting them from the raging storm outside its perimeter. The three sectors were: Industrial, Residential, and Business. Dividing the buildings and sectors were wide streets able to comfortably fit large vehicles moving both ways.

People, robotic and human alike, peppered the streets, sometimes hauling equipment or other supplies. Each one had their own set of tasks to fulfil, so they tended to move with purpose toward their destinations. Besides, no one wanted to be caught out in the cold, and boy it was cold outside.

They talked as they walked.

“I’m headed to the Nursery,” Ray said, “Where are you headed?”

“I’m going to grab some more people to help me with the crates in the warehouse.”

“You could com’ them. That way you wouldn’t need to leave the building.”

Upon closer inspection, every human could be seen wearing an earpiece of some sort. They came in all sorts of shapes and colours—some of them looked very much like earrings, and some like hearing aids—but everyone had a piece that served as the ‘speaker’ and then a ‘mic’ part (not always attached). It wasn’t just a fashion statement. Every earpiece was designed to look innocuous and perform as a communication device. There were a few public channels separating business and social. Then there were the private calls. They were all generally referred to as “the com”, or in other words the ‘communication servers’.

He shook his head. “Nah… I’ve been meaning to say hi to Brian anyway.”

She hummed in response, giving more attention to her young one who shivered in the cold. Transforming, she said goodbye to Shawn and hurried to Residential. Luckily, the Gate Room was on the border between Business and Residential, so the Nursery was practically next door.

This was done on purpose in case of evacuation. Most people were working in Business or relaxing at home, so it would be easy to quickly run to the Gate Room to be teleported to safety. The only problem was that the portion of the population working in Industrial would be the furthest from the gate room.

==

:: California, America ::

Sideswipe revved his engine in frustration. He was going in circles trying to find out where the strange bot/con could have gone to. The nearest district seemed to be mostly industry and warehousing... Not the worst place to hide, but it shouldn’t have been possible to be this good at hiding, not with the kind of radiation that the stranger was giving off. He knew he had to call it in.

~ Prime, I lost the unidentified Cybertronian. I followed their strange signature to what seems to be a set of warehouses, but the trail suddenly ends. There’s nothing here but scrap. ~

Optimus Prime was silent for a bit, then asked some questions.

~ Did they attempt to fight you or harm any humans? ~

~ They didn’t do either. They just fled as soon as they noticed me. ~

~ We will reconvene with the human soldiers. Send me the unidentified’s readings then. Prime out. ~

Sideswipe did a quick U-turn and headed back to the highway. The ‘con might’ve escaped this time, but now that he could identify them, they wouldn’t manage it a second time.

As he drove, Sideswipe spared a thought to his brother Sunstreaker, who he had been separated from since a mission at a Con compound on a very distant moon. They worked fine alone, but their teamwork was unmatched when it came to fighting. He knew if he were paired with his brother, there would be little chance for this new foe to escape.

Well, there was not much he could do about his brother. He could only hope that Sunstreaker would hear the transmission from Optimus Prime, wherever his brother is, and come to Earth. Though he imagined Sunstreaker would find this planet a little gross. It was covered in dirt particles and saltwater... not great for keeping clean and rust-free. Sunny was admittedly very vain.

==

:: Unknown Location ::

A weekly meeting containing a small number of individuals was in session, and it was not going well. The current topic of discussion was the possibility of letting in some of the non-hostile aliens into their community.

Max Wilson, a tall and bulky man with shortly cropped dark hair and bronze skin, said on the verge of shouting, “The community has been safe over these past few years because we have kept to ourselves, kept it quiet. The only thing keeping us safe is our lack of presence in their war, Ray!”

“I realize that! But, as aliens on a planet that is mostly populated by humans that hate anything remotely different, don’t you think they could use a place to call home?”

“What about your babies, huh?!”

Despite the warmth of the central heating flooding the building, everyone shivered. The one person that didn’t was the so-called mama bear. She didn’t take insults to her babies or her ability to care for them lightly. She didn’t take threats lightly.

She asked coldly, “Where are you going with this, Max Wilson?”

He paused at the tone and backtracked a bit. “I’m just saying, they’re- they’re not going to like what you’ve been hiding from them this whole time. They’re not going to understand.” Max took a breath, and seeing as no one was stopping him, he continued, “And just think, what if we do allow a few in? They’re obviously going to want to share it with their friends.

What then? How can we possibly maintain our secrecy then?”

Reluctantly, someone else piped up in agreement, “Chief has a point. As soon as our secrecy is blown, we’ll be forced to choose sides in their conflict.”

“Not to mention various governments’ reactions to tech they could only dream of.”

“We’re gonna get nuked,” joked a pale, redheaded woman next to Ray.

Ray’s cold exterior melts a bit. It’s a running joke, admittedly a lame one, but the fact that her friend Linda (the readhead) was trying to ease the tension breaks through her anger a bit. Ray’s digits meet her metallic face with a small clatter that causes scattered laughter amongst the group.

Ray sighs, and then speaks with a surprisingly soft tone. “I get it, I really do. I want to preserve our way of life here as much as possible. This is not just an experiment, it’s a home, and I would never want to jeopardize that.”

They all sense a “but” coming, and the non-human continues...

“... However, you can’t possibly think that we were going to stay hidden forever. Eventually, through one of our own, overheard conversations, or governments piercing through the storm barrier... We have to be prepared for the eventuality that they’re going to know we’re here.”

The room was very silent.

Despite the cold, despite the lack of direct sunlight, despite the layers of secrecy that prevented them from sharing the existence of their home with anyone, and despite the many problems they faced daily, everyone present had chosen to be here because it was a chance to be accepted as who they were and be cared for despite it all. It was a chance for humans and non-humans to live together in a technology-enriched environment unlike anywhere else on earth. There was no real worry about money except for those that handled the collective finances, as most wants were handled by the finance crew. And because of the vetting of each member of their community, there was a feeling of safety that didn’t come with living ‘outside’.

There were many reasons to be upset about the idea of sharing all that with unknowns.

“How about this. We agree to let this go for now, as it seems there’s no pressing need for it right now. All I ask of you is to think about it. Please.”

Gradually, people started grumbling their assent.

“I think Max had some other issues to bring up, before everyone starts leaving,” Linda announced.

The rest of the meeting passed quickly without commotion.

==

The Nursery was a big building with many wide and tall rooms. From the front door there was the central room or rec room where all could mingle and play. Connected to that central room were the shower room, Ray’s bedroom, and the children’s ‘bedrooms’, the latter which contained multiple beds as well as a ‘couch’ and tables for relaxing or working. All of the bedrooms were a motley of kids of various stages/frames in order to ensure there would always be an older child for the younger ones to turn to in case Ray was not around. She called these groups ‘families’.

The room directly opposite the front door was one the children were not allowed in. The very first frames were kept in that room, some sparked and others not. Other than the electronic locking device on the door, there were alarms as well as monitoring equipment to add some security.

Ray swept her gaze across the living room, the excited baby babble bringing a smile to her metal face. Her children mostly understood English, though she knew that the youngest would still be talking in chittering, beeping, and chirring. She stepped cautiously around the young ones on her way to a couple of kids squabbling loudly. Putting a servo/hand on her black-plated hip, she eyed them quietly until they started to get out of hand. Mindful of the newly acquired child in her arms, she stepped between the children and pushed them apart, breaking up the scuffle they were getting into.

“This isn’t the first time I’ve had to separate you two,” she commented, disappointment thick in her voice, “you know, it makes me sad when my children fight.”

One of them, Moonrider, sulked. The other, Sunstorm, looked unrepentant and seemed to bristle in response.

“Tomorrow, I am assigning each of you to older siblings no longer living in the Nursery. I expect you to listen to them. If I hear good things about you from them, I won’t force you to continue working with them.” She wouldn’t let them do work that was too hard. Most punishments for rowdy youngsters would be either light cleaning or monitoring, quite boring jobs.

“No, please mama.” The previously sulking child now pleaded.

“Oh, whatever will I do? I am so sad. My children want me to be sad.”

“No, I’m sorry mama. Don’t be sad,” Moonrider said.

The other, bristly child looked over to her with a slightly guilty face.

With a sad look on her face, Ray crouched down to their level. “I could really use a hug right now.”

Two smaller bodies attempted to hug her, followed by more, and she cracked a smile above their tiny helms.

==

:: Somewhere in America ::

After the events in Egypt, Sam returned to college to finish his education. The Autobots returned to base, though after Egypt the human government was pressuring them a lot more than before. The Decepticon threat was not enough reason to continue as they were before, considering the All-Spark was gone as well as the harvester. Now the ever-looming government liaisons were pressuring them for weapons technology and using their status as aliens on a ‘human’ planet against them.

It seems some people were just determined to be intolerant. Was everyone like that? No, they had humans that really cared. But it was admittedly disheartening to see the negative responses from both government officials and civilians alike. Optimus Prime grit his dermas and held his helm high, however.

How long ago was it since he said Earth could be home? A few months? Years? After everything that’s happened, it felt much longer.

==

:: Unknown Location ::

Because of the tentative status of the aliens on the planet right now, Ray was reluctant to let her older children help out in the warehouses. She reflexively clenched and opened her servos again and again, super aware of the rifle just out of reach. Her human team working the warehouses said they would appreciate the extra muscle. It made sense for her sturdy, strong children to help with the heavy lifting. It would mean they wouldn’t have to rent and store as many forklifts. Things would be done much faster. It was also a chance to show them the world while being carefully watched by her human team, who had all promised her their safety.

Cycling air through her vents, Ray turned her attention back to the plot of land that would become a park. They had dug up and flattened the area with dirt, then piled the material she would need in neat stacks in the centre. It would be a greenhouse of sorts, temperature and humidity carefully controlled to encourage growth. The knowledge she had of the tech behind it wasn’t that complicated, so she didn’t foresee any problems.

Clapping her servos together with a clank, a small spark flashed over her digits. She stood in front of the metal and did a pulling motion with a servo. The metal seemed to almost melt or fall apart, tumbling outwards in little streams and flowing around her to where large beams were beginning to construct themselves. Pivoting on a heel strut, she raised her hand in a lifting motion as it built supportive arches and arches for the doors. Pivoting again, she reached for the glass and similarly called to it. It melted like ice to water and formed the outer shell of the greenhouse. Lastly, she used the leftover electronics and material to create the advanced system to control the climate inside the thinly walled park.

All in all, much faster than teaching her people how to make it themselves. Stretching idly, she looked over her work, scanning a few places to determine its integrity.

“That is cool every time I see it.”

Ray turned to see a familiar redhead with blue eyes, Linda Davies, one of her dearest friends. “Linda, I didn’t see you there.”

She smiled good-naturedly, “Yeah, you seemed pretty occupied. So, how’s the build?”

“Structurally, it is good. But I really don’t know how well the climate control turned out. We’ll have to run it for a day to see.” Ray sheepishly scratched the back of her helm with rounded digits.

Linda walked over to the controls, which came in two pieces of differing sizes for each specie. Going to the smaller one, she examined the screen and buttons.

“So, how does this work?”

Ray ambled up to the smaller control and pointed out how to adjust various things. It wasn’t too difficult, and soon Linda had set the temperature to be comfortable enough for a human to be without a jacket or sweater. Deciding this would be a good test, Ray set the humidity on the bigger control, and they waited for the temperature to start changing.

“This is nice. All it needs now is grass.”

Feeling slightly distracted, Ray hummed in agreement.

Eyeing her large, metal friend, the redhead asked, “Are you worried?”

“I’m always worried.”

“You know Jenkins and all them... they won’t let anyone hurt your kids.”

There was only silence on Ray’s part.

“Besides, they’re only going to stay near the warehouse. All the delivery is still handled by other companies.”

She slowly admitted, “Yes, that’s true...”

==

:: California, America ::

~ Incoming truck. ~

The whirr of transformations filled the air as the human workers made their way to the wide metal door. Things were going well for the warehouse crew. With help from the ‘bots, moving things through the ground bridge was a lot easier. It was a little messy until they got the hang of hiding whenever a delivery arrived, but once the truck left, the stacked boxes were lifted into the ground bridge. They still required the use of machinery for the delivery trucks, and it wasn’t as fast as the ‘bots moving things straight from the truck into the warehouse, but there wasn’t much they could do about it unless they made their own deliveries.

A red-blue Peterbilt truck backed carefully but skillfully toward the warehouse door. Once the truck was in position, the driver’s side door popped open and a fairly young but muscled man stepped out. He shot the workers a half-hearted greeting before opening the trailer door.

“So, what do you guys do with all this metal?”

Eyeing the curious truck driver with a niggling suspicion, it’s Shawn that answered with practiced ease, “The company stores materials for construction.” Before the driver can ask another question, he immediately asked, “How long have you been a truck driver?”

There was a small pause, before the driver smiled and answered, “About 3 years and counting.”

“You’re pretty young. What’s your name, kid?”

The driver laughed, before trying to walk through the warehouse door. The small feeling of suspicion started blaring a loud warning and Shawn intercepted with a sharp smile.

“Sorry, kid,” he said, “Only company employees are allowed in there.”

The suspicious trucker stopped but didn’t back up. “Sorry,” he said, though Shawn was sure they weren’t at all, “just wanted to check on the load I’ve been carrying for days across Cali. Why the secrecy?”

At this point, the other workers were staring at Shawn and the unnamed trucker with cautious looks. Shawn raised a hand to the trucker and waved him back. Reluctantly, the trucker backed up, but not before spying the headlights of a vehicle around a stack of metal.

“Do you usually park your vehicle inside the warehouse while you work?” There was a look in the trucker’s eyes that screamed suspicion, though his mouth was curved into a constant smile.

“I’m sorry, but I’m going to have to ask you to go back to your vehicle while we finish unloading. I’m not sure what other companies you’ve worked with are like, but we’re very busy, and company policy says I can’t have you snooping around our wares.”

The suspicious individual raised their hands in a placating gesture and let themselves be herded back to the driver’s side of the cabin.

“Woah, didn’t mean to step on anyone’s toes.”

Shawn held back a biting remark, and simply hummed in response.

Though he helped the workers until they were finished unloading, he kept a close eye on the trucker. The closely watched man disappeared briefly into the cabin of the truck before exiting again to watch the workers from afar. Eventually, when all the metal was unloaded, the trucker sauntered over to close the trailer door before going back to the cabin to drive off. Shawn made sure to watch for the truck’s disappearance before going back into the warehouse and signalling the other workers.

The warehouse door closed and locked before the hidden bots transformed back to their bipedal selves. Their vocals whirred nervously, but they were otherwise silent.

“Hey, hey, it’s okay. They’re gone.” Shawn reassured them.

Another worker piped up, “Though that guy was really suspicious. We should report him.”

“Hey Shawn, what was that guy’s name?”

He frowned as he answered, “When I asked, he avoided the question, so I don’t know.”

The warehouse became noisy with conversation before Shawn decided to take charge and whistled loudly, grabbing their attention. “Okay, I know that was exciting, but we need to get our ‘bots out of here and get back to work. I want ‘bots to grab as much metal as you can carry before you leave. Stay on the other side of the ground bridge, moving things to storage. As for the rest of us, we’ll have to move the rest.”

Sending the request for the ground bridge to activate, Shawn clapped and sent everyone back to work. He knew neither mama bear nor Max (their chief of security) were going to like hearing about the incident. Hopefully, he could convince them that they had things under control, so that the ‘bots could remain to help.

==

[gg-astrology]

🥺😔☀️💓❤️💓

a rambly all-over-the-place personal note! Incase you just want to hear from me and talk to me!! I know i’ve been gone for a while so if any followers old/new wants to hear what I actually say when Im not answering posts, here it is! 💓❤️💓 

the main point so you don’t have to see any of the mess: any asks that talks to me like im google will be deleted! 

note: the main part of this isn’t even about the above so if u’re looking for drama or me angsting you may not find it here!! i think i sound more like im fatigued and on my last brain cells.. talking about everything and being v sappy and mellow.. so!!! 💓❤️💓 no drama. not here! not today! 

ok now, consider:

what do u guys think about me just taking it easy... i dont know if you’ve been here for a while or for long.. but I usually do pretty detailed research posts?? about topics like moon phase in astrology, basics on essential dignitaries, etc. 

Astrology ‘topics’... stuff like ‘what is x chart what does it mean’ or ‘what is x concept how does it work’ -- not about placements usually!!! 💓❤️💓Asks about placements I just answer for fun from my inbox.. but posts I actually make.. those are the type of things!!! 💓❤️💓

And well.. I just came back.. not in the mindset right now.. so i was thinking.. would u be ok/interested if i take a break from those posts and maybe post more idol astrology stuff?? nothing serious, I just want to have fun and talk about placements and gush over people who may have similar placements to us and how good they are + how we can learn from them... 

Its just fun stuff?? very light-hearted (dont talk to me about crying through them sometimes, bc theyre so good even when i see harsh aspects/them going through manifestation of that throughout their careers) -- idk!! I just want to maybe talk about girls for a while and like, ask people to love girls and support/appreciate girl groups and asian soloists and artists... 

idk!! just a thought.. like.. i’ll still answer astro stuff and maybe i’ll slip astro posts in there as well.. 90% of my blog is still main astro stuff.. just that 10% maybe i’ll do more idol readings.. it lifts my spirits and i like talking about them!! i know its a niche in tumblr, esp the kpop gg astro stuff.. but like... girls...!!! and seventeen members (im nearly done oh my god theres 3 more left!!!)

I know i put a lot of effort into the bangtan readings bc theyre like-- the semi between my usual intense stuff and the light-hearted ones so im-- probably not gonna touch them yet (for now)  -- I always have high expectations for them because they have to be a certain Standard. There’s alot of great bangtan astro posts out there -- part of that is also v pressuring. But another part is that I want to contribute to something in the community as well! That is like, new and welcomed and good and Not Bad... so... I’m holding off bc I have to have like, a week to actually write, edit, re-edit, check myself before I (usually) publish them.. so... this is ur warning my bts inner readings wont be coming out soon!! 

im just talking about gg stuff -- or other idols, thinking about twice and gfriend and oh my god.... girl groups...

I rmb I used to do it to promote solo artists that might not have gotten alot of attention as well.. I still have drafts about Bolb4.. now consider: younha... also consider: xiao zhan, wang yibo... oh my god... but what if-- idk!!! idk!!!!!!

Anyways I just want to let u know whats been on my mind!!! I honestly dont really know? I posted the bangtan answer today (with a warning beforehand) and AS SOON AS I PUBLISHED 4 people left -- to be honest its pretty funny,,, its kinda funny right?? i think its funny,,, like kpop repellent,, but also i Get it!!! its not for u its ok dont take this social media thing so seriously... its fine i do it all the time too, dont feel guilty over blocking or unfollowing someone - do it as soon as you feel uncomfy tbh its a safe place for u make it ur safe spot!!

But!! Yeah!! 💓❤️💓 Idol things, thoughts? 💓❤️💓 

And this is not related but I was looking at old questions/asks in my inbox (some that ive alrdy answered but its still there -- like 6 asks? so thats... 6 out of the current 122 asks oof) and people are So Nice and So Polite to me!!!! amazing!!! fortunate!!!! One lucky bitch!!!!! Thats me!!!! Im the lucky bitch, who?? people are just so courteous towards when they request or asks for something?? wow---

Its only like, half way in the middle of my old asks that I realize once its more mainstream astro ppl start sending asks in like im google search... rip anyone who does that i deleted the ask bc i have a faq.. my only rule is that be nice.. not playing by the rules!!!!! 

Its also a little introspective to think about it now.. how back then when I didn’t realize it was happening I carried through and answered them anyways bc like... atleast people were asking?? they’re curious?? right?? keep the public fed! there’s people out there who does enjoy my actual answer than the ask itself...but like... now that i’m back and Refreshen: any asks that talks to me like im google will be deleted. I’ll quote this and put it up before the read more so thats the main meat of this long rant!! 💓❤️💓

basically what im saying about all this is: don’t let people treat you that way, or anyway you don’t feel absolutely positively happy about. I’m still keeping some asks that I do want to answer/I think can be turned into great points. But marie-kondo yourself, you don’t deserve to be treated like someone’s encyclopedia, dictionary or google!!!!!

they don’t really care, and it doesn’t really matter if you answer or not -- bc they can just type in the same thing to other astrologer out there and mayb someone will hit it and answer for them. So!!!! dont compromise, delete anything that doesn’t treat u like human. Bc u’re not a bot!!!! Do better!!! This is from future nita to past nita!!! Do better!!! This is why u burnt out and went awol for like a month!!!!!!!! Dont let this happen again or get into the habit, cry to ur friends!!! Ask ur beta for help!!!!!!! Add some people in as ur admin so they can clearly tell u what is right and whats wrong!!!!! dummie you’re too soft and kind!!!!! stop making excuses for others!!!!!!! do better in 2020!!!!!

So this is my rambling over!!! Answered 42 asks in my queue, know that around 30 of them have already been posted. That’s 72 done today!! Not to mention the 30 yesterday -- I was v dumb and didn’t close the ask box, thus I had +10 asks in my inbox today but its ok!!!!!!! Let the people Speak!!!! I’ll post this PSA now and go I hope u enjoy hearing from me even if I’m just rambling -- love u!! take care of urself!!! i hope this helps or entertain anyone who’s looking to know me better or hear some words from me personally!!!! this is me, signing out!!! 

[moonwalkertrance]

Russian operatives used a fake Twitter account that claimed to speak for Tennessee Republicans to persuade American politicians, celebrities and journalists to share select content with their own massive lists of followers, two people familiar with the matter said.

The list of prominent people who tweeted out links from the account, @Ten_GOP, which Twitter shut down in August, includes political figures such as Michael Flynn and Roger Stone, celebrities such as Nicki Minaj and James Woods, and media personalities such as Ann Coulter and Chris Hayes.

There is no evidence that any of them knew the account was run by Russians. Independent researchers had suspected the account was Russian, and their work was confirmed Wednesday by two people familiar with the investigations into the Kremlin’s meddling in the 2016 U.S. election.

The spread of links from the account shows the remarkable reach of a disinformation campaign that harnessed the power of American celebrity and the immediacy of social media to propel messages further, faster and more cheaply than possible even a few years ago.

At a time when public scrutiny has focused on Russia’s exploitation of Facebook, the new discoveries about the reach of @Ten_GOP underscore the role Twitter and other social media platforms also played in reaching audiences, including people influential in shaping political narratives.

“They were trying to influence influencers,” said Jonathan Albright, research director at the Tow Center for Digital Journalism at Columbia University. Like several other researchers, Albright has used analytics tools to map the spread of the reported Russian account. “They’re creating buzz,” he said. “It’s a buzz machine.”

Michael Sullivan, executive director of the Tennessee Republican Party — whose verified Twitter handle is @TNGOP — said his group had complained to Twitter about the account in September of last year, as well as in March and August.

We’ve done a significant job trying to improve our digital footprint, so it’s very frustrating when you see something like that come out and continue to impersonate you,” Sullivan said.

He said he never tweeted back at the account to set the record straight. “We didn’t want to give them credit for getting under our skin,” Sullivan said.

The Russian news site RBC named @Ten_GOP in a report this week on the disinformation campaign. The account was created, according to archived versions of its account page, in November 2015 and included Tennessee’s state seal.”

Twitter declined to comment for this report.

In terms of sheer numbers, Twitter is a fraction of the size of Facebook, with fewer than 70 million U.S. users logging in monthly, compared with 210 million for Facebook. But Twitter’s reach extends far because so many celebrities and media personalities use the platform to share their views and embed tweets into their own content. That made it an ideal target for Russian operatives seeking to shape public opinion in the 2016 election, said Clinton Watts, a former FBI agent and senior fellow at the Foreign Policy Research Institute.

“Twitter can spread conspiracies much more quickly” than Facebook, Watts said. “These accounts show that they were engaging at the highest levels of the campaign. If they [Russian operatives] can get their messages into the feeds of the leaders of campaign narratives, it has tremendous weight.”

A tweet by @Ten_GOP on Oct. 10, 2016, the day after the second presidential debate, was featured in an online People magazine article on prominent online reactions. “Trump slaughtered Hillary,” tweeted @Ten_GOP, with the words followed by images of knives and the hashtag #debate.

Another widely traveled tweet came from Flynn three days before the election and linked to an ad bashing Democrat Hillary Clinton as dishonest. The ad, showing an African American actress in what at first appeared to be a pro-Clinton campaign spot, abruptly changed tone halfway through, with the actress stopping the action to say that she can’t deliver scripted lines praising Clinton because they were so at odds with the truth. “I’m not that good of an actress,” said the unidentified woman. Written on the screen, in red, are the words: “SOME PEOPLE ARE BETTER LIARS THAN OTHERS. STOP HILLARY.”

That ad — produced by Make America Number 1, a super PAC largely underwritten by conservative hedge fund executive Robert Mercer — was featured in an October 2016 article by Breitbart and reportedly played on television in the battleground states of Ohio and Pennsylvania.

The account @Ten_GOP also tweeted about it in then. Flynn linked to that tweet on Nov. 5, calling it “great” and saying it deserved to be shared widely. More than 5,300 accounts retweeted it or hit a heart-shaped “like” button to pass a link to the ad onward to their followers, according to Twitter data available on Flynn’s tweet. He later served a brief tenure as President Trump’s national security adviser and now is being scrutinized by federal investigations probing possible links between Russia and Trump’s campaign.

Flynn, through his attorney, declined to comment on the tweet.

Stone, an informal adviser to the Trump presidential campaign and another figure in the Russia probe, linked to a tweet and a picture from @Ten_GOP that has been deleted by Twitter and is not available on the Wayback Machine, an online site maintained by the Internet Archive, a nonprofit group in San Francisco. Stone said in an email that he recalled tweeting about a photo.

“There’s no way of knowing the province of the image,” Stone wrote.

Those who shared links from @Ten_GOP tended to lean conservative, according to Albright’s research, but included some liberals and others.

Minaj, a pop singer and rapper, tweeted a link in April 2017 that originated from @Ten_GOP. An archived version of the original tweet focuses on the disturbing shooting of an elderly man in Cleveland and live-streamed on Facebook Live. The tweet said of the killer, “He has claimed on Facebook to have killed 15 people in an ‘Easter Day Slaughter.’ ”

Minaj, whose representatives did not respond to queries from The Washington Post seeking comment, appeared to be reacting to the events themselves more than the tweet from @Ten_GOP, which she linked to in her tweet. “The video u posted is so disturbing,” she said. “Be safe in CLEVELAND today everyone. He just killed this old man live on social media. Jesus have mercy.”

That tweet was retweeted and “liked” more than 24,600 times. The original tweet was shared nearly 8,700 times. The content also appeared in news reports that ricocheted across the Internet, in outlets such as Daily Beast, Vanity Fair, the Huffington Post and Fox News.

But those numbers almost certainly undercount how many Twitter users saw the tweet. When a celebrity such as Minaj retweets or “likes” a link, it can potentially end up in the feeds of all 21 million of her followers. There is no way to know how many read it.

Investigators, lawmakers and propaganda researchers have said that the Russian disinformation campaign was shrewd in its use of trolls, who are people often hired to push certain types of content, and bots, which are automated accounts that can be programmed to post particular types of messages to amplify the spread of favored narratives.

Bots and trolls are most effective, experts say, when they find ways to interact online with actual people — an especially those with large followings.

“By getting a celebrity or someone famous to retweet what a bot or troll network is sending out gives an illusion of legitimacy and allows it to get picked up by the broader public,” said Samuel C. Woolley, an online propaganda researcher and research director at the Digital Intelligence Lab at the Institute for the Future, a Palo Alto, Calif.-based think tank.

Hayes, the MSNBC host, linked to an @Ten_GOP tweet, calling it “the best #EarthDay tweet so far.” The original tweet said, “Nothing says more about environmental ‘activists’ at #MarchForScience than piles of trash they left behind. #EarthDay.” It showed pictures of two overflowing garbage cans.

“I vaguely remember the tweet being pretty bonkers and thought it was the actual Tennessee GOP account because of the name,” Hayes said.

Coulter retweeted @Ten_GOP content in March on the way Trump’s handling of U.S. attorneys was being portrayed by news reports. Actor James Woods retweeted @Ten_GOP several times, including one from February in which Woods added the words above the link, “Paris resonates with the sweet sound of Islamist terrorism.”

Neither Coulter nor Woods responded to requests for comment.

[black-strike-otp]

AUs~

Heeyy here’s two things. The first one I daydreamed about late yesterevening and the other was a fever dream but I really liked it.

So you know Primus and Unicron and all the Thirteen~ No, this isn’t a Rudolph sing along. I came up with a another ‘god’ of sorts and it’s hecka stupid. But we all know there’s god(dess) of love and god(dess) of dreams well what about a Cybertronian ‘god’ who does both? Imagine a god that enters bots dreams and tells them all the bonds they’re going to make over their lifetime. (conjunx endura, emica endura, partner bonds, offspring bonds, etc). Sadly, 99.9% of bots never remember their dream in which this god visits them. The .1% chance that do recall waste their lives trying to chase down these SPECIFIC bots that they were shown, so in a way, it’s probably for the best most don’t remember. A very few 5-10% percent will get a vague sense of deja vu when meeting certain bots in their life that was shown to them in this dream, but they tend to think they just  crossed paths before. I got some srs shits n giggles imagining Blackout, during the height of his career in the Pits of Kaon, being visited by this god. And he’s like whoa what the heck why are you showing me this stuff? What is that? Is that a bug? I’m confused. What? Why are you showing me these things? Then he sees Novastrike. “No. No no no no no.” he says. The god is confused. “Something wrong? Not what you expected?” And Blackout’s like ya damn right who??? would want this?? vague gesture @ self. I’m not gonna settle ur crazy. Single Mech Life (TM). Also wow that femme is gorgeous af she must have some low standards. Like do you see her??? Damn. That is a fine lookin’ femme. Is she a goddess????? priMUS wow. For kicks, imagining Nova eventually being visited by this god and when she sees Blackout she’s like “he’s terrifying.” and then pauses and is like “but he’s handsome wow.” and then being nervous cuz he doesn’t look like the gentle type but wooOWWW look at that mech. How?? this gonna work?? When they do meet in the future they both end up with a strange deja vu experience. q;

~

The fever dream au that I ended up loving way too much for my own good~

There was a Goddess. She remains unnamed throughout the story except by her god-children, whom call her Mother. She is the creator; making the world, the humans, and Her children. The children we meet in this au are the Daughter of Fire (unnamed), the Daughter of Water (unnamed), the Son of the Underworld (unnamed). As well as a special Daughter of Persuasion.

I’ll cut out the beginning of the story since it’s unnecessary here (Fire and Water’s feud, eventually coming together, Persuasion’s birth during the war, etc). Basically after this continuous bickering between Fire & Water was finished, Mother went to sleep amongst the cosmos, giving humans the opportunity to grow on their own and her lesser-god children the ability to grow on their own.

Now being a very young new goddess, Persuasion (whose name we never get but well- ya’ll will recognize her quickly) starts spending her life persuading humans to do the right thing. They can’t see this goddess among them, save for sometimes glimpses out of the corner of their eyes. She is basically invisible among humans otherwise. She tells people not to cheat on their spouses, advises children not to steal, etc. Basically, she offers good to those who consider doing not-so-good things.

A man becomes absolutely obsessed with this goddess. From the glimpses of long flowing hair he’s seen out of the corner of his eyes, the stories of her grace and beauty, he must have her. So he goes on an adventure, and finds ‘wishing well’ per say. He casts a bounty of riches into this lake, and a humanoid merman of sorts emerges.

“What is your wish?”

“I wish for the Lady of Persuasion (name here) to become mortal,” he smugly demands.

“Your wish has been granted,” the merman echoes in a gurgly voice. “But be warned: your wish is temporary. No amount of magic can destroy a goddessof her true self forever.”

Pleased with himself, the man goes on his next adventure. Now mortal, the goddess has no ability to shield herself from humankind. Within a few days, the man somehow manages to hunt her down.

Taking pity on his sister, the God of the Underworld sends his leading and most trusted demi-god demon out to protect her.

This demonic being looks damn close to human, unless he is using his powers or grows furious. Then he becomes a frightening figure; foul, dark, frightening. Emerging from a portal into the human realm, the demi-god strikes down the human as he tries to steal away with Persuasion, saving her from the greedy human who tried to ensnare her.

Devastated that she was now human and unsure how, if it was even possible, for her to return to normal, Persuasion is reeling. She thanks the demon, who pities this poor youthful goddess. He goes to speak to his Lord, requesting that he stay and help the goddess. Although a bit upset to lose his best officer, the Underworld god agrees to his demi-god’s request.

While the demon is off speaking to his master, Persuasion gets a brief meeting with her Sister’s. Fire and Water temporarily use humanoid guises to greet their mortal sister. They offer her words of kindness; that she is brave and strong and will get through this. Unable to sustain their holoforms long however, they leave Persuasion shortly before the demon returns. She feels a little easier at heart, but still scared and worried.

This starts a grand adventure between the demon and the goddess as they try finding a ‘cure’ to fix her. They speak with human priests and priestess, shaman and monks. They pursue endlessly for months and hints on how to return her to her goddess form. At one point, Persuasion gets sick, and they visit a medicine woman of sorts. She blesses the goddess in the name of the Mother, using however a name the humans use. Persuasion at one point calls her ‘Mother’ in front of his older woman, who seems surprised. No one had referred to the great Goddess as ‘Mother’ in a long time. She seems to realize that this mortal woman is not in fact ‘mortal’ and wishes her luck on her journey when she leaves with the demon.

I could write literally a story based off their journey but the important notes throughout is their growth and understand towards each other. When the demon grows ‘ugly’ per say; his ghoulish form showing, the goddess is no less gentle and soft with him. She never shows fear; is willing to argue with him even like this and hold him. And he sees through her courage to her fear and confusion. Young, naive, willing to trust anyone she meets so easily; he tries his best encourage her to stay open to the world even when it tries to break her but to be cautious and accepting of herself. For although some thought of her as a trickster, she was really just a soft voice of reason, and she was filled with good.

They end up kissing and it’s sweet af and I died ;u; And there’s even a point when the demon is going all angry fueled asshole beast mode at one point and she still kisses him later like that and!! yes I’d kiss a monster too tbh.

Clearly THINGS were developing between them. Edgy protective buttwipe and soft but determined cute stuff.

Strangely enough, what ends up curing the goddess is that she is fatally stabbed by a jealous human man who desires her affections but she refuses to accept his advances because she’s grown feelings for her demon friend. After a swift murder of the human, the demon goes to remove the spear from the goddess only to find light pouring out of her wound. He stays away, admittedly worried the light would destroy him (he is a child of darkness  more or less).

As the wound heals, a white light cleanses over Persuasion and she’s ‘reborn’ back into her goddess self. :3 And instead of the demon going back to his master, he asks for freedom to stay with the goddess he loves. Deeply saddened to see him go, the Underworld God agrees. He has other exceptional warriors, it’s just disappointing to lose his best, but he understands.

Idk it was a cute au. I didn’t realize it was even going off track and becoming an otp au until we got the demon boi in on this and I was like “oh my god”. The amount of love and affection that peppers throughout this was hecka cute tho hng I’d put it all down but my will to type it all out is zero.

[chocobro-hijinks]

Android AU: Lunafreya - Ardyn

HELLO YES THANK YOU FOR THE REQUEST I’M ITCHING TO WRITE MORE (rest of Lunafreya, and Ardyn under cut because it’s long)

Mental Health Assistant Series: Oracle Model: Lunafreya (ST11a N0X 2.0)

you see her every time you go to the veterinarian but never talked to her in person

you thought she was just a basic receptionist android, put there to look nice and cover for the human receptionist whenever they leave the front desk

until the day you have to put your beloved pet to sleep after a long battle with sickness

the doctor allows you to stay with your pet as long as you need, and sends Lunafreya to sit with you

she smiles softly and asks permission to stay with you, you’re all alone and have nobody to support you through the ordeal, so you let her

she answers all your questions, medical and not, with an understanding smile and glossy eyes

you didn’t know a lot about androids but this one didn’t feel like a machine at all

she held you when your pet was eventually euthanized, telling you how brave you are and that your pet must have had a great life being with someone who loved them so much

she sits with you in the reception area with an arm over your shoulder until you’re ready to go 

outside, you tell her something you wouldn’t admit to a human: you felt that your pet was the only thing that cheered you up anymore

Lunafreya engulfs you in a tight hug and tells you “come see me anytime you want!”

turns out she’s lonely too, her job is to help visitors of the clinic but nobody wants to talk to her because she’s a ‘droid’ and her emotions are inherently invalid

the next day you get over your anxiety to seek her out, precisely because she wasn’t human.

she won’t judge you for being needy and emotionally dependent

when you get to the clinic you find her with flowers in her arms and she waves in greeting, she’s been waiting for you all morning!

 she sits with you in front of the clinic and listens to how your day went, waving at the doggos that pass by on their way to appointments and petting whichever ones she had permission to touch

she tells you about herself, too, how she loves blue flowers and Tenebrean breeds of dogs, and hates slimy eels and people who hate cats

and that she really likes forks (yes the actual food utensils) and wishes to someday own a fork as tall as herself

you talked about your late pet and how lonely it was to spend the night without them, how strange it feels not to fill their bowls with food and water

she doesn’t tell you to get a new one, she doesn’t tell you that you’ll get used to it, she listens and nods and holds your hand when you start crying again

for two hours it felt like someone actually cared

so you visit her everyday, just to vent about your stressful job, and to look at the pets

after a while you realize that the Lunafreya android has helped you grieve for months and now you have no more tears to shed

the day you decide to see her for the last time you try to delay the inevitable for as long as possible, just sitting with her in silence and watching people and their pets come and go

the veterinarian steps outside for some fresh air and asks if Lunafreya was any help, you tell them how happy it made you to be able to talk to her and come to terms with your loss

they tell you that the current receptionist had given in their resignation because they’re moving to a different area within Insomnia, and if you’re up for the task, you could take their place and be with Lunafreya and all the animals while working the front desk

people don’t own a Lunafreya android, she is a public figure with a noble mission to perform, but you can be with one for as long humanely possible because she is a sweetheart who would accept any and all those who need them

Independent Surgery Unit Ophillia Only Unit Ever Produced: Ardent

is the very first android to be made, named Ophillia to mean ‘help’ and ‘savior’

Project name is unofficially shortened from Independent Surgery Unit Ophillia to IN-SU-NI-IA

produced with the best technology available at the time for the sole purpose of doing highly detailed, dangerous and/or lengthy surgery

his software was a multi-million commission with Astral Tech. designed to be airtight and impossible to hack into, with a learning algorithm to automatically accept and learn new information as science progresses

all the trials were successful, it did wonderfully on cadavers and live animals, and responded well to the little changes in the patient and vitals during actual surgery

was heavily advertised as the miracle of the century, the beginning for a new era in science! now friendly androids can cure any ailment!

Lucis corporation was already putting in large orders for a whole line of them: female-presenting androids for ob/gyn, baby-faced androids for pediatrics, different skin colors and facials structures were planned for all branches of science

three patients died in the first year Ardent was an official member of the hospital staff, a small number compared to the 149 patients it saved

nope!

The media went wild with the annual report, painting the heartless robot as a murderer and giving megaphones to conspiracy theorists

“the soulless doll was unfit to handle our precious children! how could a piece of software be trusted with the life of a human? what would a machine know about the pain and suffering of illness?” 

it didn’t matter that a normal human surgeon could have a higher body count without facing any repercussions, that it was just the nature of operating on dying people

one benefactor in Lucis corporation’s council pulled their funding, making all the others anxious and unsure, stocks started plummeting

Lucis corporation immediately cancelled all orders, scrapped the whole IN-SU-NI-IA project and ended the contracts of every member of the production team, including the contract with Astrals tech.

but the android wheel was put into motion after the handsome specimen was the face of the new century all the years it was in development

the market responded, piggybacking on all those charming tv interviews and the aesthetic of human-like machines after decades of bulky imagery

instead of getting into dangerous moral struggles with the law and media, factories started selling what diverse units they already partially produced for entertainment and companionship, this time with basic software anybody can modify

Astrals tech. went on to be hired to make software for luxury series NOCT-1.5 and mental-health-medic Oracle, but under a different alias every time

The Ardent Unit disappeared from storage one day, but the hospital covered it up by publishing papers confirming it’s destruction, erasing any and all traces that the android had learned how to escape on it’s own

out in the streets, it picked up bad trait after the other from the actual humans of the land, people were pitiful, deceptive, disgusting creatures and the learning algorithm picked up on it immediately

you met this beautiful stranger in a bar one night and sat listening to his story between sips of Duscean Mesmenir

he didn’t drink, just talked and observed with a permanent smile, like your face was the most interesting thing in the world

“is that why you look like you’re falling apart?” you point to his frayed clothes and the brown wig that had lost it’s luster “how old exactly are you?”

“I’m not old, I’m vintage!“ he laughed without answering your question

bleary-eyed and very drunk, you ask for his name again before you begin to head home, planning to google some of the stuff he said just to make sure it was all real

he jumps to hold you before you trip on your own feet, you slam hard into him and slur an apology, vaguely aware that you’re never this dizzy after just a two drinks

he must have done something to you, your limbs won’t cooperate!

the sudden motion must have jostled something inside him because suddenly he’s spilling black engine oil out of every gap in his face, still smiling

“Ardyn Izunia, I’m just a bot of no consequence.”

[wornwood-blog]

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[verdigrisprowl]

May 22 Dancitron Movie Night - Alien Vs Predator

Whirl hailed it as the most romantic movie he’s seen this year. Swoop was just glad they didn’t spend half the movie talking. Starscream showed up for the express purpose of trying to cockblock Prowl. Prowl was Out Of It the whole movie and Soundwave and Tarantulas are worried.

Today ItsyBitsySpyers 8:20 pm This message has been removed. ItsyBitsySpyers 8:25 pm *Soundwave's done everything in his power to minimize the expected fidgeting today. It hasn't really worked. He sits at his usual spot and turns one arm to casually cover his abdomen. Won't hide the rest of his lights, but it's something.* Ratchet 8:26 pm *pops in* ItsyBitsySpyers 8:26 pm *Rumble and Frenzy are there to welcome everyone with a huge stash of snacks, this time closer to the crowd and not at the bar.* Tarantulas 8:26 pm *whoa wait is tarantulas early this time?? good job spide. he'll come over and lean on soundwave from behind, with a casual cheery mental hello* Ratchet 8:26 pm *aaaand.... it's only Soundwave and co. so far.* ItsyBitsySpyers 8:26 pm [[Ratchet.]] Nod. Ratchet 8:27 pm *and Tarantulas okay that's not much better. is Zori about, at least.* Tarantulas 8:27 pm *excuse u ratchet* ItsyBitsySpyers 8:27 pm *Looks up and sends a curious ping. He's usually not the one getting leaned on.* [[Welcome, Tarantulas.]] *Zori is NOT about because this movie would terrify him to pieces. Chimera is perched on a chair back as a bird though.* Ratchet 8:28 pm *excuse urself, u know Ratchet don't trust ur ass* Tarantulas 8:28 pm *he's in a good mood that bleeds over into soundwave a little, heh* B 8:28 pm *trundles in and moves immediately to a seat where she can see the rest of the room and not be in the way. waves to the twins as she goes* ItsyBitsySpyers 8:28 pm \\BIG BIT.\\ Ratchet 8:28 pm *he should probably at least return the greeting, though. politeness and all.* Evening. ItsyBitsySpyers 8:29 pm *Well, good moods are welcome. Soundwave motions to the side of himself Prowl doesn't usually sit. For now?* boomtank 8:29 pm -wanders in and plops down somewhere- B 8:29 pm *grins at the nickname* Windchill 8:30 pm *Appears, and swoops in to pick a seat.* Tarantulas 8:30 pm *for now! seems amenable enough that tara takes a seat. he'll let go of soundwave in order to keep his thoughts private while he squints at ratchet* ItsyBitsySpyers 8:30 pm [[Blaster, Bevel, Windchill. Good evening to you all.]] boomtank 8:30 pm -tired wave- Hey Windchill 8:30 pm Gee, Soundwave, you make it sound all. Late in the day or something. B 8:30 pm Hi! Ratchet 8:31 pm *arches an optic ridge at the squinting* *can he help u, spide* ItsyBitsySpyers 8:31 pm [[It is, here.]] Windchill 8:31 pm Yeah, but I don't like having to deal with reality. ItsyBitsySpyers 8:31 pm \\THEN YOU SHOULDA BEEN AN AUTOBOT.\\ {{Neheheh.}} Windchill 8:31 pm Hey now, that's rude! B 8:31 pm *tempted to double check outside to see if it really is late* Ratchet 8:31 pm >:| Tarantulas 8:32 pm *the squint looks amused now, ratchet gets a ping hello* ItsyBitsySpyers 8:32 pm \\WHAT, LIKE WE DON'T GOTTA HEAR ALL THEM TRASHIN' WHO WE WAS ALL THE TIME TOO.\\ ItsyBitsySpyers 8:32 pm *Frenzy is snickering. He's clearly poking fun here at worst* Windchill 8:33 pm ...True. Ratchet 8:33 pm *pings back* Evening to you, too. B 8:33 pm It is sad trash talk isn't the worst thing any side ever did. Ratchet 8:34 pm *snort* It's war, not a ball game. B 8:34 pm Sad but lucrative. boomtank 8:34 pm ........ ItsyBitsySpyers 8:34 pm *Rumble choke-laughs.* Tarantulas 8:34 pm *pings back, it's a ping war now* It's lovely to see you again, Ratchet - I don't even know how long it's been anymore, hyeh boomtank 8:35 pm -he's getting a headache and the movie hasn't begun yet- Ratchet 8:35 pm [[ i can't believe the first comparison i wrote was 'not a BALL GAME' fuck me, i'm still not over that stupid murder night ]] ItsyBitsySpyers 8:35 pm ((looool)) Ratchet 8:35 pm Since the last time you dropped by, I expect. Whirl 8:36 pm *trots on in; he is empty-clawed tonight* FakeProwl 8:36 pm *appears; immediately sits, pulls his knees to his chest, wraps his arms around them, and zones out.* B 8:36 pm *pleased there's so many bots around tonight* Ratchet 8:36 pm *brightens; suddenly TWO choices of people to sit with* ItsyBitsySpyers 8:36 pm *Again? But they're not even in Blurr's ship. This is HIS place. It's supposed to be a safe place.* Windchill 8:36 pm Oh look who's just arrived, everyone, it's *he drops the bass* JOHN CENAAAAAAAAA. Tarantulas 8:36 pm Not true! I've been sparse in the past, but lately I've been making time. *prowl!! prowl. prowl gets a spide arm petting him* Ratchet 8:37 pm Since the last time you dropped by /my/ place. Windchill 8:37 pm *Rocks back in his seat, trumpeting that godawful theme to the ceiling. It's all for you, Whirl, appreciate it.* Whirl 8:37 pm What is this horrid noise. Is this supposed to be MUSIC. FakeProwl 8:37 pm *flinches at surprise touch* Hm? ItsyBitsySpyers 8:37 pm //Yo, Whirl!// Ratchet 8:38 pm *where's Prowl sitting tho. Ratchet would LIKE TO SIT WITH HIM but he might go for the Whirl hammock that's not a hammock here, it's just wherever Whirl sits.* Whirl 8:38 pm And it's finally happened. Windchill's gone senile. I knew this day would come. Windchill 8:38 pm *Stops when he's trumpeted as much as the Earth meme calls for.* FakeProwl 8:38 pm *prowl's sitting next to soundwave* best decepticon leader 8:38 pm ((sorry I dropped out technical issues)) Whirl 8:38 pm *and he will cheerily bob his head at Rumble in greeting* Windchill 8:38 pm It's my horrid noise, don't you recognize me? ItsyBitsySpyers 8:38 pm ((np ss mun)) boomtank 8:39 pm -and yet Blaster finds this more relaxing than his office- Whirl 8:39 pm No, not you. The other horrid noise. Whatever nonsense THIS is. *gestures vaguely around in an attempt to indicate the music* ItsyBitsySpyers 8:39 pm {{Bird likes it. Peh.}} Ratchet 8:39 pm *well in that case, Prowl gets a wave, and Ratchet drops down next to Whirl.* Windchill 8:39 pm *Squints, not sure if sarcasm or if music is really that bad.* Whirl 8:39 pm Bird has no taste, clearly. FakeProwl 8:40 pm *doesn't notice* ItsyBitsySpyers 8:40 pm {{You shut... speaker!}} Whirl 8:40 pm *he will take a seat near Windchill, Ratchet is welcome to join, as is the usual crowd* *snickers, amused by Laserbeak's slip-up* I call em like I see em. Ratchet 8:41 pm *ping ping at Prowl* Evening, Whirl. Good to see ya. ItsyBitsySpyers 8:42 pm @Prowl: (txt): Confirmation requested: Prowl certain Prowl wants movie appearance? *He doesn't want Prowl to be here just because he thinks he has to be or something.* Whirl 8:43 pm You too, mech. Been a dog's age. *nods cordially at Ratchet* ItsyBitsySpyers 8:43 pm *Rumble and Frenzy pack in with Whirl, away from Ratchet. They know when they're not that liked anymore.* FakeProwl 8:43 pm *vague shrug tag* Windchill 8:44 pm *Surrounded by a bunch of weirdos, and Ratchet.* ItsyBitsySpyers 8:44 pm ((ALL RIGHT let's warning it up: As expected from movies of this nature, we've got violence, gore, body horror, and EGG. And also Aliens (ha) Built Civilization, I suppose.)) Windchill 8:44 pm (( What film is this. )) ItsyBitsySpyers 8:44 pm *Small nod. It's not a no. He'll take it as is.* Ratchet 8:44 pm *hey now, Ratchet's weird.* ItsyBitsySpyers 8:44 pm ((It is Alien Vs. Predator. 😄 )) Tarantulas 8:44 pm (( EGG Windchill 8:44 pm (( I LOVE THAT MOVIE. )) B 8:44 pm [[pft egg Windchill 8:44 pm (( LET'S DO IT. )) boomtank 8:44 pm ((AWESOME Whirl 8:44 pm (9I'M SO HYPE)) Ratchet 8:45 pm Been busy. You know how it is. Windchill 8:45 pm (( I watch it when I get sick it makes me feel better about myself. )) Whirl 8:45 pm *Whirl is quite happy to have his weirdos around. and Be a weirdo* God, I wish. I'm about to literally die of boredom. boomtank 8:45 pm -settles in to watch- Windchill 8:45 pm *A prime example of weirdo.* ItsyBitsySpyers 8:45 pm *Soundwave vents quietly and tries to be settled. Keyword: tries.* *And he's already leaning forward again.* Ratchet 8:46 pm *also he'll just be. scooting a little farther down the couch. away from the others on it.* Tarantulas 8:46 pm *tara's gonna move around to in front of prowl, he seems to like that spot. nudge nudge, ping with the word CUDDLE? attached* Windchill 8:46 pm It's...a thing, everyone. boomtank 8:46 pm -and picks up his data-pad to read- Ratchet 8:46 pm *sorry kiddos thanks for sitting on that side but it's a little close still* B 8:46 pm *pulls out something to work on during the movie* Whirl 8:46 pm *if Whirl notices Ratchet's discomfort, he doesn't in any way react* You seen this? *looks to Windchill* FakeProwl 8:47 pm *it takes Prowl a while to react to the ping* Windchill 8:47 pm The movie? No... Heard of it. Heard it was like, one of those horror movies or something. Thriller, maybe. Scary movies bore me. ItsyBitsySpyers 8:48 pm *Right. The ice. A tarp. He wishes he had a tarp.* \\IT'S GREAT.\\ best decepticon leader 8:48 pm Who comms someone that close? Windchill 8:48 pm Humans, obviously. ItsyBitsySpyers 8:48 pm [[It's done for effect.]] Ratchet 8:48 pm Bumblebee. FakeProwl 8:49 pm *finally responds. negative ping.* Ratchet 8:49 pm Bumblebee does that. best decepticon leader 8:49 pm Effect of looking like an aft? boomtank 8:49 pm ....? Windchill 8:49 pm Damn you, Pepsi-Cola! Ratchet 8:49 pm *and Ratchet will go ahead and ping Prowl again* Windchill 8:49 pm *He shakes his fist.* Whirl 8:50 pm I Tarantulas 8:50 pm *nnnoooo... well, tara will leave him alone for a tiny bit then* FakeProwl 8:50 pm *what? oh. pings ratchet back.* Whirl 8:50 pm *to Frenzy* I'll take your word for it. What've you two been up to? More renovations? best decepticon leader 8:50 pm He's going to die ItsyBitsySpyers 8:50 pm *Come sit with him again for now.* Windchill 8:50 pm Oh no, not this trope. You know he's dead. ItsyBitsySpyers 8:50 pm \\US? NAW. JUS' SAME OL' WORK.\\ Ratchet 8:50 pm @Prowl: You okay? Windchill 8:51 pm *Reaches and lightly prods Whirl's shoulder.* FakeProwl 8:51 pm @Ratchet «Fine.» *BLATANTLY LYING* *even as an avatar he looks tired* Whirl 8:51 pm Look at THEM, traveling in STYLE. best decepticon leader 8:51 pm Humans aren't very good at surviving cold water Whirl 8:52 pm The ONLY way to fly. *nudges Windchill back, swiveling his helm to look at him* ItsyBitsySpyers 8:52 pm {{PEH.}} Windchill 8:52 pm If we like, go on an adventure and I try to show you pictures of my kids, it means I have to die. So don't let me do that. Whirl 8:52 pm Okay, okay, I'll give some concessions for analogue flight--nearly as good as rotors. Nearly. Ratchet 8:52 pm @Prowl: Uh-huh. You wanna talk about it, or...? Whirl 8:52 pm Well, presumably, I'll already know what your kid looks like. B 8:53 pm Helicopters are pretty neat. Ratchet 8:53 pm *fair's fair, Prowl listened to Ratchet complain about his issues* Whirl 8:53 pm *PREENS SHAMELESSLY* We are. B 8:53 pm *laughs* best decepticon leader 8:53 pm not as good as jets Whirl 8:53 pm Better. Windchill 8:53 pm *Scratches his chin in thought.* It might be enough to save me from doing that. best decepticon leader 8:53 pm nope FakeProwl 8:53 pm *long pause.* @Ratchet «... No.» best decepticon leader 8:53 pm wings are elegant Whirl 8:53 pm Okay. I'll make sure not to let you show me any pictures of your horrid little beast. Tarantulas 8:53 pm *scoots over on the floor and sits on soundwave's pede, if he can't have prowl he'll have someone else entertain him* B 8:54 pm Being both is even better. best decepticon leader 8:54 pm rotors are... ugh Windchill 8:54 pm Okay, thanks. Ratchet 8:54 pm @Prowl ::All right. Lemme know if you need anything.:: FakeProwl 8:54 pm *acknowledging ping* ItsyBitsySpyers 8:54 pm *Carefully nudges Tarantulas with his knee and sends acceptance.* Windchill 8:54 pm *snorts.* ItsyBitsySpyers 8:54 pm \\YA BRAGGER, BIG BIT.\\ Whirl 8:55 pm *waves a claw* I don't listen to the opinions of second-rate fliers, sorry. Direct your incorrect opinions to another department, please. B 8:55 pm Can if I want. Whirl 8:55 pm *looks to Bevel* You a triple-changer? best decepticon leader 8:55 pm frag you Whirl 8:55 pm Ew, no thanks. I've got better taste than YOu. B 8:55 pm *tilts palm back and forth* Kinda. Windchill 8:55 pm *Keeps his mouth SHUT* best decepticon leader 8:56 pm I'm perfect, you however are far from it boomtank 8:56 pm -snorting laughter at Starscream's remark- Whirl 8:56 pm *ALSO SNORTS* B 8:56 pm *currently very much a steam engine train because reasons* Whirl 8:56 pm *but ignores it in favor of looking over Bevel; he's seen her about, but he hasn't given her a close look yet* So, what's your story, mech? best decepticon leader 8:56 pm I'll have you know my wings are considered very attractive Ratchet 8:57 pm Tcch. By who? best decepticon leader 8:57 pm fliers seekers Ratchet 8:57 pm Biased. boomtank 8:57 pm You're not in the company of seekers Windchill 8:57 pm *Raises hand.* I'm a seeker. best decepticon leader 8:57 pm people who can appreciate a nice set of wings boomtank 8:57 pm Or many Windchill 8:58 pm And I think Starscream is a putz. Ratchet 8:58 pm I've seen nicer. B 8:58 pm Mercenary and multiverse traveler. best decepticon leader 8:58 pm 😕 Whirl 8:58 pm *LAUGHS* boomtank 8:58 pm I prefer blues ItsyBitsySpyers 8:58 pm //Multiverse traveler. Pffft. Ya got lost, kiddo, c'mon.// best decepticon leader 8:58 pm ((that face does not look how I thought it would Whirl 8:58 pm Yeah, wings are overrated. They're so goofy-looking. No offense. *to Windchill* ItsyBitsySpyers 8:58 pm *Rumble flicks a treat at her and grins.* Windchill 8:58 pm I'm far beyond giving a damn about your opinion, Whirl. Whirl 8:58 pm Sounds like a good gig, mech. *nods to Bevel* ItsyBitsySpyers 8:59 pm [[He prefers his wings where they are.]] B 8:59 pm *flicks it back with a smile* Got unlost nyeh Ratchet 8:59 pm *see, look, a nicer pair of wings right there.* best decepticon leader 8:59 pm my wings are gorgeous FakeProwl 9:00 pm *he would be strongly objecting to the blatant disregard for safety in this movie if he were paying more than 10% attention to it* ItsyBitsySpyers 9:00 pm \\AS A WHAT?\\ //Firewall, bro.// \\AHHH, OKAY.\\ boomtank 9:00 pm Not really Whirl 9:00 pm Integrated weaponry is SO much more interesting that wings, or wheels, or what-have-you. And MUCH more attractive. best decepticon leader 9:00 pm the hunter moon boomtank 9:01 pm Less of a target ItsyBitsySpyers 9:01 pm [[You speak that Earth language?]] Tarantulas 9:01 pm *ohohoh whirl* Ratchet 9:01 pm Wheels are nice. best decepticon leader 9:01 pm yes Whirl 9:01 pm *shrugs* I mean, I don't DISLIKE wheels. ItsyBitsySpyers 9:01 pm *Pleasantly surprised nod.* Windchill 9:01 pm I don't know, I kind of like treads. Ratchet 9:01 pm Treads are nice too. ItsyBitsySpyers 9:01 pm [[They are attractive, on the right mech.]] Ahem. boomtank 9:02 pm ....... Whirl 9:02 pm Yeah, okay, that's fair. Treads are cool. Tanks are pretty sweet all-around. Badass machines. Tarantulas 9:02 pm *on prowl u mean, sw* Whirl 9:02 pm *shockwave, excuse u* boomtank 9:02 pm -has treads- Lord Starscream 9:02 pm *GUESS WHOS HERE TO FLOUNCE ON IN* Whirl 9:02 pm ((GEE NEDDLES)) ItsyBitsySpyers 9:02 pm *NOT YOU, BLASTER. PRIMUS.* FakeProwl 9:02 pm *whoooosh. flew right over prowl's head.* Windchill 9:02 pm Yeah, tanks. Among other things. Tarantulas 9:02 pm *tires on prowl, treads on shocky* Whirl 9:02 pm (9WHY DO YOU GET TO HAVE -TWO- STARSCREAMS?)) boomtank 9:02 pm -HE KNOWS OR HE'D BE OUTTA THERE- best decepticon leader 9:03 pm ((because we are perfect B 9:03 pm *neither of them are the best Starscream, Bevel is disappointed in both of you* FakeProwl 9:03 pm ((check out all these NOT BEST STARSCREAMS)) ((*preens*)) best decepticon leader 9:03 pm ((now we are 2x perfect B 9:03 pm [[:D [[You'll always be her favorite ItsyBitsySpyers 9:03 pm *Soundwave is surprised his comment didn't inspire more of a reaction from Tarantulas. Ah well. Everyone knew anyway.* Whirl 9:04 pm *glances to the newly-entering Starscream, and lowers his head to mutter at Rumble* You might wanna spray, mech. Looks like you guys've got an infestation. Lord Starscream 9:04 pm ((Sorry Bev you're just going to have to settle for second rate starscreams)) ItsyBitsySpyers 9:04 pm *Rumble laughs into his cube and nudges Whirl.* //Shhhshshsh.// Windchill 9:04 pm Oh no, guys. It's getting spoopy. Whirl, I'm scared. FakeProwl 9:04 pm *vaguely notices starscream. hm.* B 9:05 pm *nods to Starscream anyway because he is a Starscream and even working with different ones hasn't ruined her admiration for them in general* ItsyBitsySpyers 9:05 pm *Soundwave nods to Starscream and sends a respectful ping on private line.* Whirl 9:05 pm I'll comfort you, Windchill. Lord Starscream 9:05 pm *Starscream.. probably does not even notice Bevel. Another mech that doesn't matter yet. Soundwave gets a nod, though* Windchill 9:05 pm Thanks, bro. Hold me. Whirl 9:05 pm *leans back and plants his feet on Windchill, where they belong* Lord Starscream 9:05 pm *Starscream is just going to take up a seat near the back where he can keep an eye on just about everyone* B 9:06 pm *not even a little offended* Windchill 9:06 pm *Thrums with satisfaction. All is as it should be.* FakeProwl 9:06 pm *... oh wait. starscream.* Whirl 9:06 pm *also, Rumble, he's not gonna stop* At the very least, keep them away from each other. The last thing we need is them multiplying. ItsyBitsySpyers 9:06 pm *As well as progress updates on Metroplex. All four limbs have a very basic system set up now (with plans to improve them later). He still has upper torso and head to go.* Tarantulas 9:06 pm *wait shit* @Prowl «Should I be here if Starscream is here? Does he have any information about me that - as in -?» Whirl 9:06 pm *oh wait what's with all those blades o the screen* FakeProwl 9:06 pm @Tarantulas «Do not visibly interact with me tonight. At all.» Whirl 9:06 pm *briefly interested* Tarantulas 9:07 pm *DAMNIT* B 9:07 pm Whoa helmet. Tarantulas 9:07 pm @Prowl «....Noted.» Lord Starscream 9:07 pm *that's right~ Continuing his pettiness from the other night, either he observes Prowl's mysterious beau or he cockblocks him* *Both are acceptable outcomes* B 9:08 pm *grumbles at stupid selfish dads* ItsyBitsySpyers 9:08 pm @Whirl: //Naw, that's the other... OTHER red Starscream.// Windchill 9:08 pm That borehole looks really..interesting. *He's gonna stop himself right there.* Whirl 9:09 pm @Rumble: Oh god, you know THREE Starscreams? My sympathies, mech. Ratchet 9:09 pm *snerk* FakeProwl 9:09 pm @Tarantulas «It might be better for you to leave completely. Or at least get small enough he can't see. You don't exactly blend in with the crowd.» ItsyBitsySpyers 9:09 pm *Soundwave pings Bevel. She's not his spawn, but he has a distant interest in her ongoing safety. She okay?* @Whirl: //Oh, naw, we know more'n three. Jus' three red ones.// Whirl 9:09 pm Heh. I like her. Windchill 9:09 pm She's pretty cool. Almost took his head off. Whirl 9:10 pm @Rumble: I am even more sorry to hear that. *places a claw dramatically on his chest... which probably looks odd to the rest of the room* You lot have suffered much. Tarantulas 9:10 pm @Prowl «I - damnit. Alright. I'll leave and come back in miniature form. I'll - stick with Soundwave, then.» *forwards this comm to soundwave also* best decepticon leader 9:10 pm If she was cooler she would have taken his head off Windchill 9:10 pm *Is used to Whirl being weird, thinks nothing of it.* ItsyBitsySpyers 9:10 pm @Whirl: //Right? Fraggin' awful. I oughta get a medal.// Whirl 9:10 pm That's the opposite of her job, idiot. B 9:10 pm *pings back with a stubborn affirmative* boomtank 9:11 pm She was trying to save him, not kill him best decepticon leader 9:11 pm No one would have to know. "Oops I missed." ItsyBitsySpyers 9:11 pm *Soundwave is now terribly interested in why this is necessary, but he settles for an acknowledging ping. For now.* Ratchet 9:11 pm What else do you expect from a Starscream. Of course he advocates killing the boss. boomtank 9:11 pm Then she should have let him fall if she wanted him dead Ratchet 9:11 pm "By accident". best decepticon leader 9:11 pm Damn right boomtank 9:12 pm No blood to clean or attract anything best decepticon leader 9:12 pm True, but then you couldn't say that it was your doing boomtank 9:12 pm And? Windchill 9:12 pm I don't think Antarctica has much for landbound predators. Whirl 9:12 pm See, this is why it's an INCREDIBLY BAD idea for Starscream to be in charge. *slooowly swivels his helm around to regard Lord Starscream* best decepticon leader 9:12 pm And I would want to gloat later ItsyBitsySpyers 9:12 pm //Listen. If we ever learned stuff from pokin' in the Underworld durin' the war, it's ya don't trust no fraggin' underground cities.// Windchill 9:12 pm *Little does HE know.* Whirl 9:12 pm Can't make good decisions. A real idiot. Lord Starscream 9:13 pm If you dislike my rule you should have campaigned against me. Windchill 9:13 pm I don't trust underground ANYTHING. Lord Starscream 9:13 pm You didn't and I'm in charge, so suck it up. ItsyBitsySpyers 9:13 pm [[The one here seems to be leading Kaon well enough.]] boomtank 9:13 pm Gloat about killing him when you were trying not to get blamed for killing him Whirl 9:13 pm I wasn't in your dimension at the time, GENIUS. boomtank 9:13 pm Really? Whirl 9:13 pm I'm not from your timeline. Lord Starscream 9:13 pm Not my problem~ best decepticon leader 9:13 pm Later, when it was safe to gloat Lord Starscream 9:13 pm In fact it's completely your own problem. boomtank 9:13 pm Uh-huh Whirl 9:13 pm Considering I'm not living in your little city of idiots, it's actually not. Ratchet 9:14 pm When's he next election? best decepticon leader 9:14 pm It becomes safe eventually ItsyBitsySpyers 9:14 pm *IMMEDIATE LEAN that he tries to make look more casual once it's already too late* Ratchet 9:14 pm Maybe Whirl could still give it a shot, hehhehe. boomtank 9:14 pm Sounds like that has a few flaws that would get someone iced ItsyBitsySpyers 9:14 pm [[Queen...]] *Murmured telepathic voice.* Tarantulas 9:14 pm *yep, gonna say a goodbye to the general vicinity, leave as quietly as possible, and sneak back in in tiny spide form, crawling around in shadows til he can inconspicuously hide somewhere close enough to poke soundwave* Whirl 9:14 pm Lord, no. I don't want anything to do with those stupid NAILs. B 9:14 pm *looked casual to this unobservant af bot* best decepticon leader 9:14 pm That thing is hideous Whirl 9:14 pm ..oh! Hey! boomtank 9:14 pm ...... yikes Whirl 9:14 pm It's that neat monster we looked at, that one time. Cool. Windchill 9:14 pm Wow. ItsyBitsySpyers 9:14 pm [[It is not.]] *Glance at Blaster. He WOULD have bad taste.* Res 9:15 pm *rolls in* *literal roll* ItsyBitsySpyers 9:15 pm *Starscream, rather.* boomtank 9:15 pm That thing was huge Lord Starscream 9:15 pm *who you looking at, son* ItsyBitsySpyers 9:15 pm *The other one, don't worry.* boomtank 9:15 pm ...what was it? Whirl 9:15 pm Hey, mech! *bobs his head at Swoop* Res 9:15 pm *bobs back* Ratchet 9:15 pm Hiya, kiddo. best decepticon leader 9:16 pm My taste in monsters is fine. Keep them away from me. Whirl 9:16 pm *squints at the screen* best decepticon leader 9:16 pm All of them FakeProwl 9:16 pm (("this wall has writings from three different languages therefore clearly the culture predates those cultures" THAT'S NOT HOW LANGUAGE WORKS, GOD. FRICK.)) Whirl 9:16 pm *softly mimics the Predator noise* ItsyBitsySpyers 9:16 pm *Soundwave's attention flickers to Whirl, then back to the screen* B 9:16 pm Oh, it is invisible. FakeProwl 9:16 pm ((IF SYMBOLS FROM THREE VERY DIFFERENT LANGUAGES ARE WRITTEN ON A WALL TOGETHER THEN THAT MEANS THREE CULTURES COLLABORATED)) Res 9:16 pm *chitters with whirl, no idea why, just gonna do the thing* Windchill 9:16 pm *Almost rhymes Swoop with poop, keeps his mouth shut again.* Lord Starscream 9:16 pm ((or alternatively one person that knew three languages incompletely)) FakeProwl 9:16 pm ((IT DOESN'T MEAN THE CULTURE DIVIDED INTO THREE CULTURES THAT EACH MAGICALLY ONLY LEARNED ONE THIRD OF THE LANGUAGE)) best decepticon leader 9:16 pm Well that's a cool weapon I need ten ItsyBitsySpyers 9:16 pm \\I LOVE THESE FRAGGERS. LOOKIT THEM GO.\\ Whirl 9:16 pm This movie just got interesting. boomtank 9:16 pm Wow Res 9:16 pm Dead boomtank 9:16 pm Thermals FakeProwl 9:17 pm ((your anthropology is bad and you should feel bad)) B 9:17 pm ...I like it. Whirl 9:17 pm Hot damn. That guy's awesome. Res 9:17 pm This predator movie. It like Mirage! Keheheh. If Mirage big fighty bot keheheh. boomtank 9:17 pm He tried ItsyBitsySpyers 9:17 pm //Right?// //Mirage is a cryochicken. He wouldn't fight nothin'.// Windchill 9:17 pm Damn. ItsyBitsySpyers 9:17 pm //Jus' creeps around here all the time like we don't know it's him.// Whirl 9:18 pm hey, Windchill. boomtank 9:18 pm Oh! More of them? Ratchet 9:18 pm Mirage is a great fighter. Windchill 9:18 pm Me? Res 9:18 pm Me Swoop see Mirage kick seeker in face before B 9:18 pm Should have grabbed a rope. Whirl 9:18 pm You. Windchill 9:18 pm Oh, damn. It's always me. best decepticon leader 9:18 pm Sure you did Whirl 9:18 pm Guess what. Windchill 9:18 pm ...What? ItsyBitsySpyers 9:18 pm *Fidget. Fidget.* Res 9:18 pm ((Teenage warriorbros in a murder themed dick measuring contest? This is the song of Swoop's people.)) Whirl 9:18 pm *leans forward. Stares* ItsyBitsySpyers 9:18 pm ((has Tarantulas settled on Soundwave yet? i mighta missed it)) Whirl 9:18 pm *Predator noise* Tarantulas 9:18 pm *tara's hiding behind soundwave's pede now, just kinda casually tapping him with thoughts every once in a while. sounds like you really ARE gonna be his only entertainment for the night, sw* boomtank 9:18 pm ... B 9:19 pm Mirage still creeps around? Why? Res 9:19 pm This good movie, Soundwave. This much much much better than all talky movies before. ItsyBitsySpyers 9:19 pm *Soundwave will make damn sure not to move that pede. No squishing the spide.* Windchill 9:19 pm *Stares back at Whirl with one eye.* Res 9:19 pm WHERE BIRD? :V ItsyBitsySpyers 9:19 pm \\WHO FRAGGIN' KNOWS WHY.\\ Windchill 9:19 pm *Quietly blows a raspberry.* Whirl 9:19 pm *snickers* FakeProwl 9:20 pm ((how do they know something broke out of the body Whirl 9:20 pm ... Lord Starscream 9:20 pm ..the hell is that. Windchill 9:20 pm I like the translucent teeth on that thing. Whirl 9:20 pm So. Windchill. Is this/ Windchill 9:20 pm Um. FakeProwl 9:20 pm ((maybe something stabbed up from beneath the ribcage and jerked up)) ItsyBitsySpyers 9:20 pm *Tarantulas gets a long, extended, vaguely... respectful? [[Queeeeeeen]] in his head.* Whirl 9:20 pm Is this what it was. Y'know. best decepticon leader 9:20 pm NSFW ew Whirl 9:20 pm Is this how.... boomtank 9:20 pm ...... Windchill 9:20 pm *Strokes his chin, watching the movie sidelong.* boomtank 9:20 pm Uh....she didn't sound happy Lord Starscream 9:20 pm *looks faintly disgusted* Ah. I attended alien pornography night. Tarantulas 9:20 pm *frick. soundwave gets a millisecond of EGG!?!!!?! before tarantulas lets go immediately* Whirl 9:21 pm It's just egg-laying. Windchill 9:21 pm I'm pretty sure it doesn't involve a conveyor belt, if that's what you're asking. Lord Starscream 9:21 pm For now FakeProwl 9:21 pm *slow blink at the movie* ItsyBitsySpyers 9:21 pm *....Pings Tarantulas.* Res 9:21 pm Predators awesome :> FakeProwl 9:21 pm @Tarantulas «... Is that what you're into.» Whirl 9:21 pm I don't see what the big deal is about eggs. best decepticon leader 9:21 pm I don't want to see creepy organics laying eggs Res 9:21 pm Eggs where little birds come from :> Windchill 9:21 pm I think we can all agree that wasn't very sexy. Whirl 9:21 pm Yes, I know. Some Cybertronians hatch from eggs. Lord Starscream 9:22 pm *mutters* You, probably. Tarantulas 9:22 pm @Prowl «No, not like - no. No.» best decepticon leader 9:22 pm I'm aware of that, but we aren't creepy organics FakeProwl 9:22 pm @Tarantulas «Okay.» Res 9:22 pm Creepy? Windchill 9:22 pm I don't know. Tarantulas 9:22 pm @Soundwave «...Ignore that.» Whirl 9:22 pm I mean, you're half right. Organic? No. Creepy? Hmmm. Can't verify it, nope. ItsyBitsySpyers 9:23 pm @Tarantulas: (txt): ...Request returned. Whirl 9:23 pm *nudges the twins* Verdict? He's pretty creepy, right? B 9:23 pm He figured out that calendar really fast. FakeProwl 9:23 pm *returns to vaguely seeing the movie images flash by without processing them* best decepticon leader 9:23 pm I'd say he was smart, but he did open it so, not smart Windchill 9:23 pm *He's just going to keep quiet about eggs for the moment.* boomtank 9:23 pm Hmn? Whirl 9:24 pm I wonder what kind of mechanism is supposed to be moving all that stone around. boomtank 9:24 pm Oh. Weapons Are they gonna......nope B 9:24 pm Look like blasters. Res 9:24 pm Him sick ItsyBitsySpyers 9:24 pm //Naw. Creepy's, like. Ya gotta get the strut shivers.// Lord Starscream 9:24 pm He's dead. boomtank 9:24 pm They don't know what they are. Great. Res 9:24 pm Him get butt kicked if him bad at breathing keheh Whirl 9:25 pm Yeah, yeah. He's more like.. nauseating. ItsyBitsySpyers 9:25 pm \\PTCHHAHA.\\ Tarantulas 9:25 pm *...k tara's got his thoughts reined in enough to touch now* @Soundwave [You mean regarding the QUEEN business?] best decepticon leader 9:25 pm Genius Res 9:25 pm *bounces* Fighting time Her have pointy hair :> Windchill 9:26 pm This is one of the many reasons why anything underground is not to be trusted. boomtank 9:26 pm Eggs? ItsyBitsySpyers 9:26 pm @Tarantulas: [[...And your EGG. Yes.]] Whirl 9:26 pm *clicks his claws in anticipation* About time! boomtank 9:26 pm Why are they there? Windchill 9:26 pm Yeah, Swoop. She looks like an Anime character. ItsyBitsySpyers 9:26 pm //Here we go!// Whirl 9:26 pm I wanna see those other guys in action. Windchill 9:26 pm Oh, um. Boy, those sure are some eggs. Tarantulas 9:26 pm @Soundwave [Deal.] *aaaaand he's promptly letting go again* best decepticon leader 9:26 pm Not eggs, eggs don't open like that Whirl 9:27 pm So. boomtank 9:27 pm What...the...!!!!! Whirl 9:27 pm I'm guessing that's not what--HA LOOK AT 'EM GO. Res 9:27 pm Keheheh them catch with FACE Whirl 9:27 pm That's not what it looked like when your little one hatched? boomtank 9:27 pm -scrambles backwards and noooope- Windchill 9:27 pm No. Trust me, when she hatched, there was more screaming. ItsyBitsySpyers 9:27 pm *Yeah, he's not gonna be able to look Tarantulas in the visor for a little bit.* best decepticon leader 9:27 pm Who's little one? Whirl 9:27 pm Heh. ItsyBitsySpyers 9:27 pm [[There will be more screaming soon enough.]] Windchill 9:28 pm But beyond that, I guess. Pretty close. boomtank 9:28 pm That's not...that's not...oh I don't like this Whirl 9:28 pm *nods* Windchill 9:28 pm Lots of slime, translucent body...you can still see her insides. I don't know why. Res 9:28 pm Oh it cave Whirl 9:28 pm Sounds... weird. But I guess no less weird than the way I was born. FakeProwl 9:28 pm *... oh, wait, the jumpy things. prowl remembers the jumpy things.* Res 9:29 pm How you born? Windchill 9:29 pm ...Were you see through? Res 9:29 pm Me Swoop built in cave :> With Snarl boomtank 9:29 pm -nope. NOPE- Whirl 9:29 pm Nah. Windchill 9:29 pm *Raises eyebrows.* Lord Starscream 9:29 pm *NOPE* Disgusting. B 9:29 pm :| Whirl 9:29 pm Just a little white cone. I'm told, though, that my legs developed first. And I ran around. best decepticon leader 9:29 pm ew FakeProwl 9:29 pm ... These are the... Ratchet 9:29 pm You were not built in a cave. ItsyBitsySpyers 9:29 pm //Wait really?// Windchill 9:29 pm Aw. ItsyBitsySpyers 9:29 pm *Soundwave looks over at Prowl. He's talking again?* Ratchet 9:29 pm You were built in the Ark's command center. Res 9:29 pm Me Swoop was TOO built in cave Whirl 9:29 pm Took 'em a while to catch me. Res 9:30 pm Me Swoop see picture Windchill 9:30 pm Like a wild ostrich? Whirl 9:30 pm ((which... who was rumble's comment directed at)) Ratchet 9:30 pm I would know, kiddo, I was there building you. ItsyBitsySpyers 9:30 pm ((at whirl)) FakeProwl 9:30 pm *gestures vaguely at Soundwave* The... baby version of your costume? Whirl 9:30 pm *looks to Rumble and nods* Yep. best decepticon leader 9:30 pm I was built in a lab Windchill 9:30 pm Oh no it's the stabby guys again. Whirl 9:30 pm I mean, I developed the rest of my everything later on. Lord Starscream 9:30 pm That was just pathetic. ItsyBitsySpyers 9:30 pm *Soundwave is silent for a second before offering a slow nod.* Whirl 9:30 pm Ohh, I like the stabby guys. Lord Starscream 9:30 pm Just blunder right on into a wire hoop in the air why dont you. Res 9:30 pm KA Nice Dead boomtank 9:30 pm I...really? Windchill 9:31 pm It was invisible to humans. FakeProwl 9:31 pm Hm. Tarantulas 9:31 pm @Soundwave [...Costume?] Windchill 9:31 pm Wow. Res 9:31 pm Him bad at climbing keheh FakeProwl 9:31 pm *well, now he knows what the movie is about. not that he'd really had the presence of mind to wonder before now, but.* Windchill 9:32 pm Hold me, Whirl. ItsyBitsySpyers 9:32 pm *Soundwave sends Tarantulas an image of the full-frame armor he wore to make him resemble a Cybertronian version of a xenomorph a few months back. Very detailed. Buzzsaw's work.* Whirl 9:32 pm *lifts his feet and then plops them down again* Res 9:32 pm Them need flier on team next time. Or tank. Keheh. Windchill 9:32 pm *Why is he watching a movie about being underground again?* Thanks. boomtank 9:32 pm -snorts- Res 9:32 pm Oh triangle cave Windchill 9:32 pm Lovely. boomtank 9:32 pm -calmer now- Res 9:33 pm That not fun. You have to drag wings. Other cave better Whirl 9:33 pm Only a problem if you've got big, clunky wings. ...no offence, Swoop. Res 9:33 pm Me Swoop wings very big keheh Little clunky Tarantulas 9:33 pm *soundwave gets a pulse of oohneatwowadmirationintriguedamused* Res 9:33 pm *flops them* Maybe very keheheh Whirl 9:34 pm *snickers; see? Swoop can admit it* ItsyBitsySpyers 9:34 pm *Buzzsaw seems to puff up from across the room* Whirl 9:34 pm You're an analogue flier, though, right? boomtank 9:34 pm All that coughing is gonna get them all caught Whirl 9:34 pm You flap to fly? Res 9:34 pm Analogue ItsyBitsySpyers 9:34 pm *Soundwave just sends him amused-grateful.* Res 9:34 pm Yah Me Swoop flap to fly Whirl 9:34 pm *nods* I can respect that. Windchill 9:34 pm *Stop saying analogue.* ItsyBitsySpyers 9:34 pm *His focus is... a little elsewhere.* Res 9:35 pm Keheh. New pterodactyl called "flaplings." ItsyBitsySpyers 9:35 pm *His biolights flicker brighter, drop too dim, and finally settle a few degrees above where they originally were.* boomtank 9:35 pm ....oh Whirl 9:35 pm Pfft. boomtank 9:35 pm That's...that's not good Whirl 9:35 pm Reminds me of you, Windchill. Windchill 9:35 pm Oh man, it drools almost as much as I do. Res 9:36 pm Me Swoop have to 'watch weight' for flying *pats his belly* Whirl 9:36 pm *LAUGHS* Looks cool, but man, are they messy little guys. B 9:36 pm *welp so much for the dads* Res 9:36 pm Dead boomtank 9:36 pm Whoops Res 9:36 pm Two dead Windchill 9:36 pm *Snickers.* ItsyBitsySpyers 9:36 pm [[They're organics. It is to be expected, even from them.]] Windchill 9:36 pm I told you, don't show people pictures of your kids on a mission. best decepticon leader 9:37 pm Who does that anyway Whirl 9:37 pm Yeah. but that's a whole lot of drool, even for an organic. Tarantulas 9:37 pm @Soundwave [Not all organics huff huff] Res 9:37 pm Oh! Net MEAN. Keheh. Nice. Windchill 9:37 pm Probably people with kids. Idiots like me. B 9:37 pm I want a net like that. Whirl 9:37 pm Haha, damn! She went right for him! Res 9:37 pm Slag pick me Swoop up that way before. It sucks. KAH! Sweep the leg OH Dead ItsyBitsySpyers 9:38 pm @Tarantulas: (txt): Present company understood superior. Lord Starscream 9:38 pm Now kiss. Whirl 9:38 pm Neat. Res 9:38 pm No kiss Windchill 9:38 pm Wow, even my tongue can't do that. best decepticon leader 9:38 pm You would think they'd be more worried about the other aliens than the humans ItsyBitsySpyers 9:38 pm //Heh. We can.// boomtank 9:39 pm Yikes ItsyBitsySpyers 9:39 pm \\FIGHT! FIGHT!\\ Whirl 9:39 pm Oh, yeah. You guys got that thing. *begins to bring his claws up, but remembers not to just in time* boomtank 9:39 pm Awesome, but still. Yikes Res 9:39 pm OOOhhhhh! :V ItsyBitsySpyers 9:39 pm *SUSPICIOUS LOOK FROM FRENZY... seems satisfied by the failure to go through with it* best decepticon leader 9:39 pm Humans are so easily breakable and live such short lives there isn't much point hunting them Windchill 9:39 pm *Blinks. He doesn't want to know.* Whirl 9:39 pm If I ever got a mouth again, I wouldn't mind a spring-loaded weapon in it. B 9:39 pm Ha ItsyBitsySpyers 9:40 pm [[Such a delightful defense mechanism.]] Whirl 9:40 pm Ha! Res 9:40 pm Kahaha! Whirl 9:40 pm Look at him GO! *click click click* ItsyBitsySpyers 9:40 pm *STOP CLICKING FOR PRIMUS' SAKE* boomtank 9:40 pm Acidic blood FakeProwl 9:40 pm *mumbles* It's very useful. ItsyBitsySpyers 9:40 pm *Soundwave fidgets slightly.* boomtank 9:40 pm Useful B 9:40 pm I caught a lot of bots off guard with it. Whirl 9:40 pm *CLAW CLICKS THIS TIME* ItsyBitsySpyers 9:40 pm [[..."Very useful?"]] FakeProwl 9:41 pm Bleeding acid. Res 9:41 pm Ka! Him jump into net. Dumb. Windchill 9:41 pm So many bones. best decepticon leader 9:41 pm what's with the net Res 9:41 pm KAHAHA! DEAD Lord Starscream 9:41 pm ... *rubs chin at alien* Whirl 9:41 pm Gruesome. *approvingly* boomtank 9:41 pm Two down ItsyBitsySpyers 9:41 pm [[How do you know this?]] Res 9:42 pm Old guy sucks at running FakeProwl 9:42 pm Combat experience. ItsyBitsySpyers 9:42 pm \\THIS STUFF MAKES ME WANNA GET INTO A FIGHT, PRIMUS.\\ Windchill 9:42 pm I have an idea. B 9:42 pm Yeah. Windchill 9:42 pm Fight me. Res 9:42 pm Me Swoop fight you :> Windchill 9:42 pm HEY. ItsyBitsySpyers 9:42 pm [[...You. Bleed acid?]] *He knew most Prowls could fire it in pellets, but...* best decepticon leader 9:43 pm See it's hunting, it doesn't want the weak one Res 9:43 pm KAHAHA! Nice. Flame thrower. Oh, him not do anything with flamethrower.... Whirl 9:43 pm Those helmet guys are awesome. Res 9:43 pm Predator Windchill 9:43 pm *Winces.* I almost died watching that. Whirl 9:44 pm Predator? ...well. It's to-the-point. ((HE HAS THE GLAIVE)) FakeProwl 9:44 pm Spray, mainly. But depends on where I'm cut. Lord Starscream 9:44 pm ..wait. Res 9:44 pm Badass :V Whirl 9:44 pm *laughs* best decepticon leader 9:44 pm Predator implies eating, it doesn't appear to be eating them B 9:44 pm This Predator is awesome. Whirl 9:44 pm i LIKE THAT ONE. Lord Starscream 9:44 pm *swivels head around to stare at Prowl* You have acid blood?!? Whirl 9:45 pm ((oops all caps)) ItsyBitsySpyers 9:45 pm *Is Tarantulas touching Soundwave right now? Actually, he doesn't need to be. The air around him just got several degreeshotter. And his lights might be just. Blaring. Now.* Windchill 9:45 pm (( Whirl calm down please. )) Whirl 9:45 pm ((he scream)) Res 9:45 pm ((no whirl calm UP)) boomtank 9:45 pm -Why all the sudden screaming?- FakeProwl 9:45 pm *... was he talking that loud? thought he was just talking in soundwave range.* Whirl 9:45 pm ((he didn't actually scream)) ItsyBitsySpyers 9:45 pm [[He sees.]] Entirely too level a mental voice. Tarantulas 9:46 pm @Soundwave [Are you QUITE alright?] Lord Starscream 9:46 pm *he heard bits and pieces* *hence the question* ItsyBitsySpyers 9:46 pm *...And out of nowhere, on SUCH A PRIVATE LINE, an affection ping. Don't question it. Just. Just accept it.* boomtank 9:46 pm ignore that then)) B 9:46 pm *didn't hear anything but would think it was cool if she had* FakeProwl 9:46 pm ... As I said. Depends on where I'm cut. Whirl 9:46 pm Well, damn, looks like he's going to get one of those. Chest guys. FakeProwl 9:46 pm ((booooo let the humans build their own damn pyramids)) Windchill 9:47 pm Damn, and he didn't even show off kiddy pictures. Look at them go! Res 9:47 pm Dead ItsyBitsySpyers 9:47 pm @Tarantulas: [[He's fine. He dislikes snow. It is comforting to be warmer.]] Res 9:47 pm OH very dead Whirl 9:47 pm Pretty neat. ItsyBitsySpyers 9:47 pm *Lying like hell.* FakeProwl 9:47 pm *confused blink at soundwave* ItsyBitsySpyers 9:48 pm *Rumble bumps Whirl.* //Chestbursters, mech.// Windchill 9:48 pm Oh wow, that';s some goo. ItsyBitsySpyers 9:48 pm //Descriptive, ain't it?// Tarantulas 9:48 pm *yep, soundwave gets a little disbelieving nudge* Whirl 9:48 pm Pfft. As to-the-point as "predator," yep. Between the two.. *taps his helm with a claw* I think I like the Preds more. Res 9:48 pm Slimey keh YAH them awesome *bounces* Windchill 9:49 pm Oops. ItsyBitsySpyers 9:49 pm *Soundwave refuses to dignify that nudge with a response.* Windchill 9:49 pm I like the slimy ones. Whirl 9:49 pm But the babies are kinda cute. The little jumping guys. Windchill 9:49 pm They remind me of me. And my slime monsters. ItsyBitsySpyers 9:49 pm [[He admires the sleek ones more, himself. But the predators are excellent hunters.]] *Looks back at Prowl. Yes?* Whirl 9:49 pm They're pretty all right. I like their tails. And acid blood IS neat. Windchill 9:50 pm I like the drool. Res 9:50 pm Predator armor cooler. It got skulls. Whirl 9:50 pm I... don't. Not so much. FakeProwl 9:50 pm *... well, if soundwave isn't going to explain.* ItsyBitsySpyers 9:50 pm *Well, Prowl didn't ask.* B 9:50 pm I like their blades. ItsyBitsySpyers 9:50 pm //They both got blades.// Whirl 9:50 pm But, only one of 'em can THROW their blade. ItsyBitsySpyers 9:51 pm [[Only one of them is physically inferior and in need of doing so.]] B 9:51 pm The ones on the Predator is cooler. Whirl 9:51 pm Pfft. Defensive, much? FakeProwl 9:51 pm *looks back dully at the movie* best decepticon leader 9:51 pm ((I wish that was louder, I could have translated ItsyBitsySpyers 9:52 pm ((he basically said "i can't wait to get out of the pyramid with you because i'm shitting myself" Res 9:52 pm That why team need flyer. Team fall. ItsyBitsySpyers 9:52 pm \\YEAH, THEM ARM KNIVES IS PRETTY WICKED.\\ //Humans can't fly, mech.// Whirl 9:52 pm *nods* No expedition's compete without at least one flier. B 9:52 pm Bet I could make 'em. Res 9:53 pm *nods with Whirl, he gets it* boomtank 9:53 pm ..... ItsyBitsySpyers 9:53 pm *Abruptly wonders what Prowl would look like in mostly black paint. Just as abruptly shoves the thought as far back into his mind as he can.* boomtank 9:53 pm and humans are down to one Whirl 9:53 pm I mean... I think the arm blades LOOK cool, but I don't personally need any. *clicks his claws demonstratively8 Mine're built in. ItsyBitsySpyers 9:53 pm *Distraction. Distraction. He pings Tarantulas.* Windchill 9:53 pm Can you throw your claws though? Tarantulas 9:54 pm @Soundwave [Hmm?] Res 9:54 pm Take arm off. You can do anything. Keheheh. Whirl 9:54 pm Nah, but distance weapons are what my guns are for. ItsyBitsySpyers 9:54 pm @Tarantulas: [[Why -did- you choose the spider?]] Windchill 9:54 pm Fair enough. Whirl 9:54 pm HA! ItsyBitsySpyers 9:54 pm //Hey, she killed one of 'em!// Tarantulas 9:54 pm @Soundwave [Is - hyeh - is now really the time for that?] Whirl 9:54 pm Hot damn! Windchill 9:55 pm She's lucky if that blood doesn't get on her. Res 9:55 pm Dunno. It pretty cool scars. Windchill 9:55 pm Look at that drool, it's beautiful. ItsyBitsySpyers 9:55 pm @Tarantulas: [[They were discussing appealing organic traits. It seemed fitting.]] Whirl 9:55 pm Ugh. *shudders* Res 9:55 pm Why you drooly bot? That weird. Whirl 9:55 pm No, I can't do all that drooling. Windchill 9:55 pm It reminds me of my boyfriend. Res 9:55 pm ?? Him gross? ItsyBitsySpyers 9:55 pm //Hot damn, what a gun!// Whirl 9:55 pm Hell yeah! Windchill 9:56 pm He's very gross. I love it. Res 9:56 pm Oh that REALLY GOOD shoulder cannon Tarantulas 9:56 pm @Soundwave [File available for film? That infrared shot of the xenomorphs was - intriguing, needs inspection] ItsyBitsySpyers 9:57 pm @Tarantulas: [Available.] Whirl 9:57 pm *tilts head* Res 9:57 pm KAHAWESOME ItsyBitsySpyers 9:58 pm //...Oooooo, he likes her.// Whirl 9:58 pm Is he making--is he giving her weapons made out of its corpse? Windchill 9:58 pm I have to admit, that's kind of cool. B 9:58 pm Awesome weapons. best decepticon leader 9:58 pm cool Whirl 9:58 pm ...that's the most romantic thing I've seen all damn year, Res 9:58 pm Romantic? Whirl 9:58 pm Yep. best decepticon leader 9:58 pm ew Res 9:58 pm *head tilt* Windchill 9:58 pm FREE HER. boomtank 9:59 pm Oh, that's bad ItsyBitsySpyers 9:59 pm *Note to himself. Prowl can probably break out of handcuffs.* Whirl 9:59 pm They're going on a HUNT together, too! ItsyBitsySpyers 9:59 pm *Rumble puts his chin on his fists and grins at the movie.* Whirl 9:59 pm Soundwave, I didn't know you were showing is a love story. You rascal. Res 9:59 pm Love story??? ItsyBitsySpyers 9:59 pm *Soft huff laughter.* FakeProwl 10:00 pm *... interspecies communication is nice* Whirl 10:00 pm Yeah. This just became, like, a date. Windchill 10:00 pm Eh, the alien has a chest bug thing so I imagine it'll be short lived. Tragic. Res 10:00 pm *confused pterodactyl noises at Whirl* Whirl 10:00 pm Look, the moment the other person dismembers the corpse of a monster you've bested and presents you with weapons and armor made from the sundry body parts, it's a date. End of story. ItsyBitsySpyers 10:00 pm //Ain't nobody killed nothin' for me before. Or shared huntin'.// //She's real lucky.// Res 10:00 pm Oh Whirl 10:00 pm *nods* Same, on both counts. FakeProwl 10:01 pm *wouldn't call it "romantic" but the moment when the tall alien showed the human that he was giving her armor and weapons by demonstrating what it does got to him a little* ItsyBitsySpyers 10:01 pm @Tarantulas: [[What intrigues you about the scan?]] Windchill 10:01 pm *Scratches his chin.* Do dead animals count? Res 10:01 pm *mental note for Bird* Whirl 10:01 pm I mean, only if it's an impressive kill. FakeProwl 10:01 pm *about the only part of the movie so far that reached through his fog* Whirl 10:01 pm ((SAVE ME FROM THIS YAUTJA, his had tilt)) *HEAD FakeProwl 10:02 pm (("lil bitch")) Windchill 10:02 pm Hmm, nevermind then. Nothing on Earth is that impressive. Ratchet 10:02 pm [[ okay i gotta sleep, night friends ]] ItsyBitsySpyers 10:02 pm ((awwww night fabu)) FakeProwl 10:02 pm ((gnight)) Tarantulas 10:02 pm @Soundwave [Provided a better anatomical perspective, detailing] B 10:02 pm [[night ItsyBitsySpyers 10:02 pm *Look at her GO.* Windchill 10:02 pm (( Goodnight! )) Tarantulas 10:02 pm (( night fabu <3 Whirl 10:02 pm Pssh. I'm sure your junxy would be happy with whatever you brought him. ((gnight!!)) Get him a whale or something. Res 10:02 pm Junky? Windchill 10:02 pm Eh, nah, he's the one who brings home the dead things. Ooh, she said a baaaaad word. Whirl 10:02 pm *predator noise* Windchill 10:03 pm I guess she means it. ItsyBitsySpyers 10:03 pm @Whirl: [[Please. Desist.]] Res 10:03 pm Oh, bomb Whirl 10:03 pm *jerks and looks over at Soundwave* @Soundwave: Huh? ItsyBitsySpyers 10:03 pm @Tarantulas: [[What use is that to you?]] *Curiosity-intrigue-surprise* Whirl 10:04 pm ((just like the super mario bros movie...)) Windchill 10:04 pm (( Oh my god. )) ItsyBitsySpyers 10:04 pm @Whirl: [[It is unpleasant.]] Tarantulas 10:04 pm @Soundwave [I won't know until I look, will I?] *amusement* Whirl 10:04 pm @Soundwave: Oh, gotcha. Didn't know it gave you the heebie-jeebies. ItsyBitsySpyers 10:04 pm \\RUN FOR YOUR FRAGGIN' LIVES!\\ boomtank 10:05 pm -flinches at the explosion/collapse- Windchill 10:05 pm Gee, it sure would be helpful if they could fly. Whirl 10:05 pm *snickers* Windchill 10:05 pm At least it's not underground anymore. ItsyBitsySpyers 10:05 pm @Whirl: [[It doesn't. It is merely grating.]] On his ability to sit still, maybe. *Leans forward again.* Whirl 10:05 pm *shrugs; he'll stop* PFFT. Look at that face! Windchill 10:05 pm *Raises eyebrows.* ItsyBitsySpyers 10:05 pm //HAHA!// Whirl 10:05 pm Pretty cool. Tarantulas 10:05 pm *hooo boy* Windchill 10:06 pm It's...awfully familiar. ItsyBitsySpyers 10:06 pm *The twins are gone. They're down.* Res 10:06 pm Oh yeah, predator have, uhh, things. On face. ItsyBitsySpyers 10:06 pm {{Oooo, her get hunt mark!}} Res 10:06 pm Bird :V Hi Bird Hi boomtank 10:06 pm !!!! ItsyBitsySpyers 10:06 pm {{Hi!}} Whirl 10:06 pm *gestures to screen* Romantic. Tarantulas 10:06 pm @Soundwave [Queen~?] *can't help himself* Windchill 10:07 pm Huge, huge is good. I approve of huge piles of drool. Whirl 10:07 pm *clicks his claws* *LOOK AT THEM FIGHTING THE BIG HORRIFYIGN QUEEN TOGETHER* ItsyBitsySpyers 10:07 pm @Tarantulas: [[Hmph.]] Windchill 10:08 pm *His queen is bigger and more horrifying.* Whirl 10:08 pm nICE! B 10:08 pm Yay! Res 10:08 pm KAHA good one!! Windchill 10:08 pm Right in the head. Whirl 10:08 pm ((dangit all caps)) ItsyBitsySpyers 10:09 pm //Aw, no! C'mon, they was jus' gettin' to know each other!// Windchill 10:09 pm He's dead. Whirl 10:09 pm A tragedy. B 10:09 pm 😞 Res 10:09 pm Dead ItsyBitsySpyers 10:09 pm *Rumble throws energon slivers at the screen* Windchill 10:09 pm He was dead anyway. Whirl 10:09 pm Yeah, I'm pretty sure he's got a chestburster in there. FakeProwl 10:09 pm ... We don't know where his vitals are. Maybe it's non-fatal. Res 10:09 pm KAHA Him FLY ItsyBitsySpyers 10:09 pm //It killed the frag outta the other two.// Tarantulas 10:10 pm *flurry of distress @ soundwave's foot* *poor aliens* best decepticon leader 10:10 pm Maybe with decent medical attention it wouldn't be FakeProwl 10:10 pm All the stab wounds were slightly different angles. boomtank 10:10 pm ...so everyone dies ItsyBitsySpyers 10:10 pm *Half-smothered return of said distress mixed with somewhat comforting pulses.* best decepticon leader 10:10 pm We don't know where their medics are Windchill 10:10 pm Twitchy mouthparts, look at them. Whirl 10:10 pm He was the coolest fragger in the film. boomtank 10:10 pm Aside from the one human ItsyBitsySpyers 10:10 pm //Well, he's dead now--hold up.// Whirl 10:11 pm Damn. boomtank 10:11 pm ooooooor not ItsyBitsySpyers 10:11 pm //They been standin' aroun' the whole time?// Res 10:11 pm them late to fighting ItsyBitsySpyers 10:11 pm \\...OHHHHHH.\\ Whirl 10:12 pm Nice, Windchill 10:12 pm They're still assholes. boomtank 10:12 pm She's one of their warriors now, huh? ItsyBitsySpyers 10:12 pm *At least these organics are also designed well. Proper mouths, almost.* Whirl 10:12 pm Hey, he didn't pass the test. *shrugs* Tarantulas 10:12 pm *yis, good mouths* B 10:12 pm *almost* ItsyBitsySpyers 10:13 pm //She gonna drive to the boat, I guess?// Windchill 10:13 pm Now what, they just come back in a century and almost kill everyone on Earth for their dumb games again? ItsyBitsySpyers 10:13 pm //Aw frag, frag, frag, he's got the--// boomtank 10:13 pm So. All good, for another 100 years? Windchill 10:13 pm I don't appreciate that. boomtank 10:13 pm OR NOT Res 10:13 pm Them got things like You Bird *reaches a claw tip out to boom a mandible* best decepticon leader 10:13 pm Yeah, how does she get back? Or does she die there Whirl 10:13 pm HA. Well, luckily, Windchill, i ItsyBitsySpyers 10:13 pm *Bird pinches his finger. Rude!* Whirl 10:13 pm t's justa movie. Res 10:14 pm Keheheheh <3 FakeProwl 10:14 pm ... I guess he's not going to be getting proper medical attention, then. Whirl 10:14 pm Pfft, nope! FakeProwl 10:14 pm *well. now he's depressed.* Windchill 10:14 pm Yeah, but still. They're assholes. Whirl 10:14 pm That was decent. Very romantic near the end. best decepticon leader 10:14 pm They must have been intending to hunt the alien in him boomtank 10:14 pm Hopefully Windchill 10:14 pm Or maybe they were too stupid to scan him. boomtank 10:14 pm Because, if not? That's gonna be one rude surprise B 10:14 pm Hope they wanted to hunt it. FakeProwl 10:15 pm *he was starting to like the tall guy after he adopted the human.* Windchill 10:15 pm (( This is so much better than the sequel was, GOD. )) Whirl 10:15 pm ((i know man. i know)) ((i saw the sequel in theaters... i still have the pre-release movie poster about, somewhere)) Windchill 10:16 pm (( I refuse to acknowledge that film except when talking crap about it. )) boomtank 10:16 pm I love this movie)) B 10:16 pm At least the cool warrior lady lived, even if her friend died. ItsyBitsySpyers 10:16 pm ((i forgive the sequel on account of the predalien)) Whirl 10:16 pm Yeah, I liked her. ItsyBitsySpyers 10:16 pm *Rumble sighs and flops back on his seat, slouching* //Can't nobody get a happy endin' no more.// Windchill 10:16 pm (( If it hadn't been little better than a sci-fi channel original with TEENAGERS -I don't like teenagers, okay- it wouldn't have been half so bad. )) I still like the drooly ones. Because of the drool. I'm really superficial that way. Whirl 10:17 pm *nods in sympathy to Rumble* Yeah, I feel ya. Windchill 10:17 pm I liked the uh, other guy's mandibles though. Whirl 10:17 pm Still that? THAT is how you do a first date. Res 10:17 pm *looks at bird* Windchill 10:17 pm ...It's not how I do a first date. Whirl 10:17 pm Yeah, well, you know my feelings on excess drool. Ugh. B 10:17 pm Without the dying part though, right? Whirl 10:17 pm Preferably, but go big or go home, right? ItsyBitsySpyers 10:17 pm *Soundwave retreats into his own helm, intending to focus on calming his systems down.* Windchill 10:18 pm *Looks rather smug. He's a drool machine, take it or leave it.* ItsyBitsySpyers 10:18 pm *Just a couple minutes.* ((obligatory mocking of own muse)) Tarantulas 10:18 pm (( omg sw best decepticon leader 10:18 pm ((I have to go, thanks for the stream 😄 Whirl 10:18 pm ((PFFT)) ItsyBitsySpyers 10:18 pm ((bye!)) Whirl 10:18 pm ((seeya dude!)) B 10:18 pm [[bye Windchill 10:18 pm (( Bye! )) ItsyBitsySpyers 10:19 pm //Next time, I'm gettin' me a date like that.// *Look! Progress! He's actually had a thought about future dates. Finally.* Whirl 10:20 pm *nudges* Hell yeah. I'm rooting for you, mech. Tarantulas 10:20 pm @Prowl «...It seems likely Starscream is staying longer than I feel comfortable doing, so - I... I'll see you soon?» Windchill 10:20 pm *Stretches, but not enough to dislodge Whirl's feet.* B 10:20 pm Yeah. ItsyBitsySpyers 10:20 pm //Yeah?// *Bop.* //You too. Don't be takin' nothin' less, I say.// FakeProwl 10:21 pm @Tarantulas «Mm.» Whirl 10:21 pm *snorts* I appreciate your wishful thinking, mech. Lord Starscream 10:21 pm *sort of. zoned out there for a while. Had an interesting spirit journey into a shed* boomtank 10:21 pm ....that was interesting Whirl 10:21 pm Soundwave--after this, would you be willing to take a request? Windchill 10:21 pm I was wondering when we'd get to see a decent movie. Whirl 10:21 pm Now that you're playing something recognizable as music again? ItsyBitsySpyers 10:22 pm *Well, he's got his lights back under control. The temperature will just have to stay, it seems.* [[Hmm? Yes. Of course.]] Whirl 10:22 pm Make Me Lose Control, Eric Carmen *salutes with a claw by way of thank-you* ItsyBitsySpyers 10:23 pm [[And it pleases him to provide decent movies.]] Tarantulas 10:23 pm @Prowl «Is that a - *sigh* ...oh Prowl. Nevermind. I'll comm you.» FakeProwl 10:23 pm @Tarantulas «What?» Tarantulas 10:23 pm @Soundwave «Don't forget to send me the file, now, hyeh.» Whirl 10:24 pm *does not burst into song, but he will squint his optic and contentedly tap the table with his claw* FakeProwl 10:24 pm *prowl's pede is up on the couch, he's got his knees pulled up to his chest. not to say tarantulas CAN'T nudge his pede but it'll take a little climbing.* Lord Starscream 10:24 pm *looks faintly pained again* ItsyBitsySpyers 10:24 pm @Tarantulas: (txt): Not forgetting. Egg. Tarantulas 10:24 pm (( edited. also SW STOp ItsyBitsySpyers 10:25 pm *FAIR'S FAIR* //Kinda gushy for ya, ain't it? It ain't no Kokomo.// Whirl 10:26 pm Hey, I'm in a mood. Who wouldn't be, after that? Tarantulas 10:26 pm *tara pings sw a number that just happens to be sw's peak temp for the evening. take that* Whirl 10:26 pm It's got a good beat. ItsyBitsySpyers 10:26 pm //Yeah, all right.// *RUDE* Lord Starscream 10:26 pm It's awful. boomtank 10:26 pm .... Lord Starscream 10:26 pm It can't decide if it wants to be a ballad or power so it's neither. Tarantulas 10:26 pm @Prowl «I'm - simply worried. About you.» ItsyBitsySpyers 10:26 pm [[What do you suggest, Lord Starscream?]] Lord Starscream 10:27 pm Or /barber shop/. Whirl 10:27 pm That's what makes it fun. It's all over the place. And, it's got a good beat. Lord Starscream 10:27 pm Isn't the theme of the evening Queen? Or, rather, Queens? ItsyBitsySpyers 10:27 pm *TARANTULAS DID YOU TELL STARSCREAM* Windchill 10:27 pm *Leans over, snorts on Whirl with his frightening nostrils once the song is over.* Whirl 10:27 pm Are you sure you wanna do this, Starscream. because odds are good, I'll sing it. FakeProwl 10:28 pm @Tarantulas «There's nothing to worry about.» Whirl 10:28 pm If it's Queen, and I know the words. Are you ready to deal with these consequences. Lord Starscream 10:28 pm *smirks* Sing and I'll join you in a duet. Windchill 10:28 pm *Squints.* boomtank 10:28 pm Please don't FakeProwl 10:28 pm *pre-emptively covers audials* Lord Starscream 10:28 pm Are YOU prepared to deal with the consequences? Whirl 10:28 pm *squints at* Windchill 10:28 pm That's MY job. B 10:28 pm *much more interested in squishy love ballads if there's going to be terrible singing involved* Whirl 10:29 pm ((HOW DARE YOU MAKE WHIRL SING THIS WITH STARSCREAM)) *deep breath* ItsyBitsySpyers 10:29 pm ((HAHAHA)) Whirl 10:29 pm Okay. If you guys know the choral parts. Join in. B 10:29 pm Um. *nope* Tarantulas 10:29 pm @Prowl «Are you labeling my concerns irrational, then?» Whirl 10:29 pm *he's gonna launch right in; and Whirl's no Freddie Mercury, but he's got a shockingly pleasant voice* *YOUR MOVE, MISTER PRESIDENT* FakeProwl 10:30 pm *suddenly looks 3x more tired* Windchill 10:30 pm *Shakes his head.* Lord Starscream 10:30 pm *This is amusing, and what Starscream lacks in any ability to sound like anything actually plesant, he's definitely got the range needed* *no one will enjoy this duet* ItsyBitsySpyers 10:30 pm *Rumble will join in. Why not.* *Soundwave just shakes his helm.* Whirl 10:31 pm *he's gonna pick his feet up off Windchill and plant them on the floor cos he's got to get into it now* Windchill 10:31 pm *Good luck, bro.* FakeProwl 10:31 pm *lacks the mental fortitude to deal with Tarantulas's—guilt tripping, manipulation, whatever it is he's doing this time.* boomtank 10:31 pm -tempted to join- Whirl 10:31 pm *SOME OTHER BRAVE SOUL JOIN US* FakeProwl 10:31 pm *disappears* Whirl 10:31 pm C'mon, mecha, I KNOW you know the words! Windchill 10:31 pm *He's not interested in singing with Starscream.* Tarantulas 10:31 pm *...damnit* @Soundwave «What. Is. Wrong. With. Prowl.» Lord Starscream 10:32 pm *think of it as screaming with Starscream* Whirl 10:32 pm *he's tapping his claw to the beat of the clapping* Lord Starscream 10:32 pm *or at* Windchill 10:32 pm *He also doesn't like much Queen, so.* Whirl 10:32 pm *TIME FOR THE BIG FINISH* boomtank 10:33 pm -pffff- ItsyBitsySpyers 10:33 pm @Tarantulas: (txt): Unknown. Worrisome. Soundwave cannot pry more where not wanted, will not pry when Starscream here. Waiting. *Rumble is on his knees being dramatic and everything* Whirl 10:33 pm *this side of the room goes hard in the paint* Lord Starscream 10:33 pm *just listen to those high notes. feel the blood run from your ears* ItsyBitsySpyers 10:34 pm *And Prowl has gone?* Whirl 10:34 pm *dissolves into laughter* B 10:34 pm *claps* ItsyBitsySpyers 10:34 pm *Cautious ping to him.* boomtank 10:34 pm ....... Whirl 10:34 pm Thank you, thank you. You killed it, Rumble. ItsyBitsySpyers 10:34 pm //Heh.// Windchill 10:34 pm He really did. boomtank 10:34 pm ow Whirl 10:34 pm And Starscream killed the rest of us. *perks up* Another good one by Carmen. Lord Starscream 10:35 pm *snickers. it was almost fun, actually* FakeProwl 10:35 pm *it takes a while before the ping is answered. with another ping.* B 10:35 pm *this song doesn't sound as funny as the title suggests* *disappointed* Windchill 10:35 pm *This is a little more his speed.* Windchill 10:37 pm (( One day, I promise u, Chill and Whirl will have a proper duet. You will regret. )) ItsyBitsySpyers 10:37 pm *Not. Entirely sure what that means. Gonna test a question.* @Prowl: (txt): ...Prowl finished tonight? Whirl 10:37 pm ((when it's time for the elmo song0) Windchill 10:37 pm (( Or Bangkok, don't forget that one. )) FakeProwl 10:37 pm @Soundwave «Yes.» Whirl 10:37 pm ((true)) Windchill 10:37 pm (( But yes, The Elmo Song. )) Tarantulas 10:37 pm *tarantulas is by soundwave's pede poking him with irritable worried thoughts about prowl now. can't access prowl, must divert frustration elsewhere* Windchill 10:38 pm (( It is their destiny. )) ItsyBitsySpyers 10:39 pm @Prowl: (txt): Future circumstance adjustment required? Cannot - want - apologies; assistance urge. Worried, both. Windchill 10:39 pm (( Ew I can hear...an anime...wafting up from downstairs. )) FakeProwl 10:39 pm @Soundwave «... "Future circumstance adjustment"?» ItsyBitsySpyers 10:40 pm *Soundwave casually lets one hand drape down off the couch with a finger touching the floor. Settle in his hand, Tarantulas. It's more comforting than the floor.* boomtank 10:41 pm -now what is going on?- ItsyBitsySpyers 10:42 pm @Prowl: (txt): Cannot identify departure reason. Understanding within permitted boundaries sought - if problem: here. Tarantulas 10:42 pm *sure thing, tara's taking that hand opportunity. he's even tinier now though since prowl's gone, roughly digit-tip size. pokepokepoke, more thoughts. heard anything from prowl?* FakeProwl 10:42 pm @Soundwave «Tarantulas was being Tarantulas. Didn't want to deal with it.» B 10:43 pm *pulls out something to work on* ItsyBitsySpyers 10:43 pm @Prowl: (txt): ...Understood. Prowl wants silence...? Whirl 10:44 pm Anyway, I'm out. See you guys. *bobs his head to Windchill and the twins* And you. Mercenary. Didn't catch your name. ItsyBitsySpyers 10:44 pm *Soundwave sends a [[Please hold]] and another pulse.* Windchill 10:44 pm Bye, you saggy boob. B 10:44 pm Bye, Whirl ItsyBitsySpyers 10:44 pm //Aww. Okay, but next time you're singin' more.// Windchill 10:44 pm *He is free.* Whirl 10:44 pm Excuse you. My boob is eminently perky. boomtank 10:44 pm -waves to Whirl- Windchill 10:44 pm *Waggles his eyebrows.* I'll show you perky. Whirl 10:44 pm *looks to Rumble, amused* I will, as long as the good music keeps flowing in. Windchill 10:44 pm But we're in public/ FakeProwl 10:44 pm *vague shrug tag* Whirl 10:44 pm Oh, go home to your junxy and your kid, you rascal. *waves a claw at* Windchill 10:45 pm I will, it's probably about feeding time anyway. Lord Starscream 10:45 pm *this might be Starscream's cue to leave too* Whirl 10:45 pm *and he will bob his head at Blaster, too* Windchill 10:46 pm *Sits there, trying to calculate the least effective means of getting out of his seat.* *Short of not actually leaving, that is.* B 10:46 pm Bevel Whirl 10:46 pm Gotcha. As you might've guess, I'm Whirl. Lord Starscream 10:46 pm Right, that was an adventure. B 10:47 pm It was hard to miss. ItsyBitsySpyers 10:47 pm @Tarantulas: [[He is receiving mostly vague shrugs. Give him time. If you wish to rest here awhile, you may. Remain in his presence.]] Whirl 10:47 pm I tend to make an impression. Windchill 10:47 pm Like my butt made an impression in your berth? *Please stop him.* Whirl 10:47 pm Lord. You still haven't fixed that. Windchill 10:47 pm *He's acting out.* Whirl 10:47 pm You're in A MOOD tonight. ItsyBitsySpyers 10:48 pm @Prowl: (txt): If shrug: vague, not no, yes. Question: Topic forbidden outright if prying attempted? Windchill 10:48 pm It's not as funny to reference if I fix it. Lord Starscream 10:48 pm I think I'll take my leave. ItsyBitsySpyers 10:48 pm [[Very well. Goodnight, Lord Starscream.]] Lord Starscream 10:48 pm I'll contact those of you in my employ later for a status update on your various tasks. Goodnight. ItsyBitsySpyers 10:48 pm *He technically sent his earlier.* Lord Starscream 10:48 pm *a casual wave and he's sashaying outta here* Windchill 10:48 pm *He decides to slide, slowly, to the floor. Yes, good.* Heh, glad I'm not working for that guy. boomtank 10:49 pm Yeesh FakeProwl 10:49 pm @Soundwave «... I really don't know or care if I want silence.» *that's the topic we're talking about, right?* Whirl 10:49 pm ...*pauses* Yeah, me too. ItsyBitsySpyers 10:49 pm *One of them.* Whirl 10:49 pm But that begs the question of who the hell he was talking to. B 10:49 pm *finally gets a couple pieces to work right and set the whole thing skittering slowly across the table with a small nudge* boomtank 10:49 pm Glad I don't have to deal with him ItsyBitsySpyers 10:49 pm *Primus damn it, Starscream.* Windchill 10:50 pm *Pretends to melt into a pile of sludge.* Whirl 10:50 pm *swivels his head about and eventually pauses on the mech who called him "Lord"* ItsyBitsySpyers 10:50 pm *Meets Whirl's stare with a (falsely) curious glance before resuming his usual music-listening pose* Windchill 10:51 pm *Sits up on his elbows.* Whirl 10:51 pm *his antenna flicks, and he looks down at the twins, instead* Tarantulas 10:51 pm @Soundwave [Acceptable] *settles in, little tapping, restless thoughts. what if he spun a web between sw's fingers* ItsyBitsySpyers 10:51 pm *Rumble looks up. Hmm?* *Soundwave would be faintly grossed out but probably also impressed.* B 10:52 pm *good thing the one she calls Lord didn't show up or Whirl'd have an aneurysm* Windchill 10:52 pm *Crosses his ankles, casually. He's going to wait this one out, just to see.* Whirl 10:53 pm *one Starscream is more or less like the other... or so he thinks, anyway* ItsyBitsySpyers 10:53 pm @Prowl: (txt): If silence desire not known, then test proposed. Soundwave 'speaks', Prowl listens, answers until decision made. Whirl 10:53 pm *he looks away again, not saying anything, but the cogs are quietly turning* ItsyBitsySpyers 10:54 pm *Soundwave did choose to teach Whirl bridges for good reasons. Being sharper than he appears was one of them.* Whirl 10:55 pm All right, later, losers! *waves a claw and trots off for real* Windchill 10:55 pm Bye, loser! B 10:55 pm *catches automata before it walks off the table and sets it back down in the middle of the table* FakeProwl 10:55 pm *............ vague shrug ping* *he's too tired for this complicated nonsense but also too tired to have the presence of mind to articulate this* ItsyBitsySpyers 10:56 pm //Seeya!// Whirl 10:56 pm *bobs his helm one last time* Windchill 10:56 pm *Grunts and rolls onto his front before pushing off and climbing to his feeties.* ItsyBitsySpyers 10:56 pm \\BIG BIT. DO THAT ON THE FRAGGIN' BAR, HUH? IT'S GONNA BREAK.\\ *Primus grant him patience.* boomtank 10:57 pm -stretches and stands- Ugh, ow, too long in one position ItsyBitsySpyers 10:57 pm //Gettin' old, huh?// boomtank 10:57 pm Getting stressed ItsyBitsySpyers 10:58 pm @Prowl: (txt): Prowl state changed between meetings. Prowl hurt, damaged? B 10:58 pm Will not. *gets up anyway and heads to the bar, longer surface might be better to see that it keeps working* FakeProwl 10:58 pm @Soundwave «No.» Windchill 10:58 pm Well, at least, despite everything, nobody puked this time. ItsyBitsySpyers 10:59 pm [[Fortunately.]] B 10:59 pm That was gross. Windchill 11:00 pm Not to worry. *He places a meaty hand on his chest.* Should you ever decide you're in need of more puke, I can oblige. B 11:00 pm Ew. Windchill 11:01 pm I have talents. ItsyBitsySpyers 11:01 pm @Prowl: (txt): Internal, external source? Other mech caused state? B 11:01 pm Better talents than vomit. Unless it is acid vomit. ItsyBitsySpyers 11:01 pm *NOT NOW, BEVEL.* Windchill 11:02 pm Hey, I can vomit, scream, AND hit on Whirl. That's at least a few talents. *None of them are good, but he has them.* FakeProwl 11:02 pm *long pause* *what is this interrogation prowl is tired* Tarantulas 11:02 pm *impatient little taptaptaps on sw's hand* Lord Starscream 11:02 pm ((I really thought this was gonna be Hallehjuah)) B 11:03 pm Sonic screaming? ItsyBitsySpyers 11:03 pm @Tarantulas: [[Trying. Trying.]] FakeProwl 11:03 pm @Soundwave «I'm tired.» Windchill 11:03 pm ...Depends on the atmosphere. FakeProwl 11:03 pm *no. that's not good enough. soundwave can ask why prowl is tired.* @Soundwave «I want to not talk about it.» ItsyBitsySpyers 11:04 pm *Vents. Damn it.* boomtank 11:04 pm -and on that, he's leaving- G'night ItsyBitsySpyers 11:04 pm //Night, mech.// Windchill 11:05 pm *Waves at the back of Blaster's retreating head.* ItsyBitsySpyers 11:06 pm @Prowl: (txt): Other talk wanted? Complete distraction? Silent company? ...Anything? boomtank 11:07 pm thanks for the stream, bye now!)) ItsyBitsySpyers 11:07 pm ((you're welcome!! see you next time 😄 )) Tarantulas 11:07 pm (( bye!! B 11:07 pm [[bye Windchill 11:08 pm (( Bye! )) FakeProwl 11:08 pm *long pause* B 11:09 pm *automaton makes it 3/4 of the way down the bar before grinding to a halt. picks it back up and sits on the floor to see what went wrong* I got hit by a sonic bullet once. Hurt really bad. FakeProwl 11:09 pm @Soundwave «... Nothing.» Windchill 11:10 pm Yeah, bullets hurt when they hit you. *He says this as gently, yet condescendingly as possible.* Tarantulas 11:10 pm *...alright, tarantulas is too invested in this situation to leave and he wants company, he's going to stick around a while if soundwave lets him...?* ItsyBitsySpyers 11:10 pm *Soundwave said he would.* *The hand not holding Tarantulas visibly flexes and twitches with frustration. But.* Tarantulas 11:11 pm *good. he's gonna cling* ItsyBitsySpyers 11:12 pm @Prowl: (txt): Understood. If something needed, Soundwave listens. Until then, space given. Will see when Prowl wants seen. Goodnight. Take self-care. FakeProwl 11:12 pm *ping* B 11:13 pm *stares at Windchill for a moment before shrugging and looking back at what she's doing* Yeah. Windchill 11:14 pm *Manages to look even more smug than usual.* I'm off, got a wiggle worm to feed. Windchill 11:16 pm Good night, suckers. *aaaaaand he's out!* ItsyBitsySpyers 11:17 pm [[Farewell.]] @Tarantulas: [[Prowl has not been hurt or damaged, but he is tired. The reason is still unclear. He does not wish to be assisted or bothered.]] Pause. Should he tell Tarantulas about the other thing? ... No. That's Prowl's to talk about. [[Prowl knows we are worried, and to speak when he is ready. We can do nothing else for now.]] *He buzzes Rumble and Frenzy. They immediately hop up to head over to Bevel and keep her company a while.* B 11:18 pm *company appreciated* Tarantulas 11:19 pm @Soundwave [He IS hurt somehow, not physically. If he would just TALK about it...] *weh weh much unhappy feelings* ItsyBitsySpyers 11:20 pm @Tarantulas: [[He meant physically.]] *Believe him, he gets it. The helpless frustration is strong with this one.* Tarantulas 11:20 pm @Soundwave [What if he NEEDS to be pushed. Sometimes when in a slump - need stimulus to revitalize -] ItsyBitsySpyers 11:22 pm *Fretting, uncertainty, and an interesting touch of revulsion at the idea of overriding Prowl stating 'nothing'.* Tarantulas 11:23 pm *random thought, does he have to stay tiny, should he stay tiny, hmm what does sw think* ItsyBitsySpyers 11:23 pm [[He cannot disregard what he was told.]] Be big if he wants. Starscream is gone. [[He must not.]] Tarantulas 11:24 pm [Why not?] *gradually he'll crawl off soundwave's hand onto his lap and become medium-sized spide pillow* ItsyBitsySpyers 11:27 pm *Image of petting. An offer, while the mun looks fo rsomething.* Tarantulas 11:28 pm *yis, eager assent. petting is good* ItsyBitsySpyers 11:30 pm [][][]I would appreciate if you didn’t make unilateral decisions about what activities and conversations I am and am not comfortable with on the basis of your own assumptions about the meaning of ambiguous statements. I would appreciate if you’d let me decide for myself.[][][] [[Prowl decided. He will not disrespect that. To do so would be assuming that he controls Prowl.]] A HARSH shake of his helm. [[He does not. He will not act as though he does.]] B 11:30 pm *mun is going to leave but Bevel will hang out with the twins by the bar for a little while yet* ItsyBitsySpyers 11:30 pm *They'll ask her plenty of questions about her automaton, and later, offer to play a game upstairs on the screens with her.* B 11:31 pm *yay questions and game* ItsyBitsySpyers 11:32 pm *That was a painful quote to share, but he doesn't have anything better to expressly illustrate his reasoning.* *He distracts himself with the petting. The fur is still - it's so overwhelming, but that's probably more helpful than frustrating right now.* Tarantulas 11:32 pm *difficult-to-read thoughts are percolating for a minute before tarantulas answers* Tarantulas 11:38 pm [It's - not a matter of control, so much as doing what's /best/. That lies outside of anyone's control. Prowl can decide what he wants, but he might not even know the POSSIBILITIES - that is, he may hurt himself by isolating himself - and what is our - my - responsibility to Prowl other than to make sure he doesn't do such a thing? Clarity is impossible, but doing nothing while waiting for the smoke to clear - no. Not acceptable. That is to say, also, I don't know exactly what to do or suggest, but nothing - nothing is not - not enough.] ItsyBitsySpyers 11:40 pm *His hand goes still.* ItsyBitsySpyers 11:45 pm [[You do not know what is best. You -cannot- know, because we do not know what is -wrong.- If he hurts himself by isolating himself, then we offer to help repair him. And it is -our-]] he heard that "my" [[responsibility to assume that the mech who helped direct the -entire Autobot army- can direct himself for some time without our interference.]] [[He said nothing. Nothing -will- be enough.]] ItsyBitsySpyers 11:47 pm [][][]You might know a lot - but not even you know everything.[][][] Yesterday Tarantulas 11:52 pm [Just because someone skillfully directs others doesn't necessarily mean they can direct themselves as neatly! That - that is to say - he is highly competent, but not infallible, and - if there is something we can do, we should take that opportunity - of course, something that doesn't go against his wishes , but -] *a quote? ...it goes in one audial and out the other* [I DON'T know everything, I'm painfully aware of that fact, and I want to know! I /need/ to know. For - for Prowl.] ItsyBitsySpyers 12:01 am *The old urge to crush the spider under his hand briefly resurges in a locked-off part of his mind. He pushes it aside. It might solve his current irritation with Tarantulas' refusal to listen, but it'd destroy a valuable resource, one of the only ones who doesn't judge him for his own interest in Prowl, and he really, really doubts Prowl would be happy that he did it when he found out.* [[No. During the war, we encountered countless "opportunities". Not all of them are meant to be taken. A truly intelligent mech knows the difference... or else is willing to learn. And when the wish is 'nothing', -all- things go against it.]] ItsyBitsySpyers 12:02 am [[And you do not need to know for Prowl. You need to know for yourself. As he does.]] Feel that roiling urge to pester and pester and pester until he finds out - and the tight leash on which it is kept. [[We cannot have everything we want, Tarantulas. It is unwise to seek that.]] Tarantulas 12:03 am *oh, the 'willing to learn' part bit stung a little for reasons he's not disclosing* ItsyBitsySpyers 12:04 am *Good. Half of these are barbs simultaneously directed at himself. They can sting together.* Tarantulas 12:08 am [Nothing, one person's nothing - where do the lines end? What ARE we allowed to do? Must we sit here and bicker, bide, waste? Because -] *ugh, no. nnnno. he does not like that last bit. he's literally just going to suppress a swell of thoughts and emotions and keep going down his other path* [What if - the Constructicons? They might know something, and we wouldn't have to bother Prowl?] ItsyBitsySpyers 12:15 am [[The nothing of the person you claim is your -entire world.- We are allowed to sit and be patient, and perhaps learn to speak to one another instead.]] He shifts uneasily when Tarantulas brings up the Constructicons. That's... that's a good point, and while he suspects they don't exactly like him, he's pretty sure they don't hate him either. They like Rumble well enough, anyway. [[...No. They are part of each other. It is a backdoor. A cheat.]] Tarantulas 12:15 am *a thought flickers through in a millisecond - he could step off soundwave's lap and selectively touch him in order to parse his thoughts secretly, but that would mean he would be being shady* *thankfully he doesn't worry about it with soundwave's response right now* Tarantulas 12:23 am [We - we could. Speak. It's just uncomfortable -] *that gush of feeling is easily read* [- to wait. Even if it's not 'doing nothing'. Prowl is - distressed; I'M distressed. YOU'RE distressed. What is there to speak about? A distraction?] ... [And I - suppose... Would it REALLY hurt to comm them, though...? I...] ItsyBitsySpyers 12:33 am [[Of course it is uncomfortable.]] The vague sense of wanting to find someone and punish them for this. Nobody should be making the ones he wants to protect feel this way. Maybe a hint of failure in there as well? [[It does not change what is true. And it would hurt. Prowl will know if you do, and he will be displeased. You know that. He has been before.]] [[A distraction would be most welcome, if you are amenable to one. He can think of several.]]

At this point I left the stream for the night. Apparently Soundwave and Tarantulas are still talking.

[brianobrienny]

5 Reasons Automation is the New Reality in Digital Marketing

When you hear the term “automation,” you typically associate it with the latest technology, AI, and computer data science.

However, automation is actually not that new. Humans have always been searching for ways to make our daily lives easier by getting machines to take over various tasks.

In fact, the earliest examples of automation can be traced back over 2,000 years when the Chinese developed trip hammers powered by flowing water.

Our more modern understanding of digital automation really started in the 1980s when engineers started to look for ways to automated the entire manufacturing process. Since then, computers started to become a part of our daily lives, and thanks to modern tech, automation is now more common than ever – especially in the business world.

There is surprisingly a lot of controversy surrounding marketing automation from both marketers and consumers. Apart from the fear that automated robots will steal away millions of jobs, many claim that it eliminates the human touch in marketing that is so critical for lead nurturing.

But the reality is that digital and content automation is here and it is here to stay. After all, three out of four marketers are now using automation in some capacity in their strategies. But if you need a little bit more convincing, here are the top five reasons why you need to be ready to embrace digital marketing automation right away!

1. Increases Brand Recall

We live in a world of instant gratification. We can use our phones to instantly give us answers to questions, pull up directions, stream music and videos we want, and order food straight to our front door. We are also constantly distracted with notifications and advertisements – with the result that the attention span of today’s consumers has become shockingly short (although not quite down to a goldfish’s) – they are likely to forget an interaction with your brand unless you make it remarkable (or screw up).

Automation allows your company to use promotion techniques like remarketing to keep your brand or product at the forefront of their minds. We all remember that moment we discussed a certain product or brand over the phone with our friends and saw a Facebook ad for it the next minute!

The thing is that after a certain amount of times, this brand name actually sticks and it can influence your purchasing decisions. Research from Red C Marketing shows that 4 out of 5 customers are likely to gravitate towards a brand that they are familiar with compared to a new one. So, establishing this recognition with automatic retargeting is going to help boost conversions.

2. Improves Personalization

Obviously, personalization is on the forefront of most marketing strategies due to the high demand for customized experiences from consumers. Unfortunately, though, many are struggling to keep up. According to a report titled Decoding Personalization from Sailthru, most experts agree that a shortage of resources, issues with data collection, and an overall lack of internal knowledge and expertise stand in the way of effective personalization for their company.

The only true solution here is intelligent automation. Technology like AI and machine learning can gather, segment, and analyze data also instantaneously and turn those numbers into actionable strategies that influence consumer behavior. Automation can be used for the simplest acts of personalization (such as product recommendations) to the most complex (AI-powered sales bot and customized webpage layouts for effective lead nurturing).

3. Helps Meet Customers’ Expectations

Consumer demand for instant interactions and assistance is making service and support a burden for many companies – they simply cannot keep up with rising customer expectations. Smaller companies cannot afford to pay for round-the-clock customer service; even larger corporations find it hard to respond to every request in a timely manner.

Consumers want instant assistance from businesses and they are becoming unwilling to wait on the phone or for a response via email or even a social media DM. Automated live chats can instantly answer common questions, solve problems, and connect customers with the right “real” person if they need further help. Whether it is a guided live chat that offers various options for answers or an intelligent AI bot with NLP capabilities, automated customer service is going to drastically improve the customer experience.

4. Creates New Roles in Marketing

Although it is certainly true that automation will put people out of work in some industries and traditional roles, it is creating new job roles in the technology as well as business realms. Many companies are expanding their C-Suite with new roles like CAO (Chief Automation Officer), CUEO (Chief User Experience Officer), CDO (Chief Data Officer), and CPO (Chief Privacy Officer). Each of these C-Suite positions will play a critical role to ensure that automation is helping both the business and the customer all while protecting consumer data.

The demand for data scientists and marketing automation experts is also on the rise, with salaries of specialists averaging at around $50,000 a year. What’s even more exciting is the opportunity for many people with these skills to work remotely as independent contractors or consultants for businesses that need assistance in this area.

5. Can Be Used By Businesses of All Sizes

Typically, when emerging technology arrives on the scene it is only accessible to large corporations with massive budgets. But automation is a great leveler, especially in marketing; companies of all sizes can incorporate automation in varying degrees. It allows small businesses and startups to offer customers a better UX with personalized experiences and automated communication for lead nurturing.

Martech is becoming more accessible and affordable for SMBs – many tools offer price tiers based on your business’s size and application. On the other hand, enterprises can use automation to connect with customers on an individual basis through ABM and hyper-personalization.

Embrace the Reality

If you’ve been holding back on going all-in with automated marketing, it’s time to ask yourself why. Automation is driving the future of digital marketing, whether you like it or not (but thankfully, there are a lot of reasons to like it).

If you need a good starting point, begin by looking for the aspects of your company where simple automation can make the biggest impact. This includes

Document collaboration and sharing

Email marketing

Task scheduling and management

Invoicing

Project management

Lead generation

Lead nurturing

Customer service

Remarketing

Automation is here to help your business grow – if you’re willing to give it a chance.

If you are ready to get more traffic to your site with quality content that’s published consistently, check out our Content Builder Service. Set up a quick consultation, and I’ll send you a free PDF version of my books. Get started today–and generate more traffic and leads for your business.

The post 5 Reasons Automation is the New Reality in Digital Marketing appeared first on Marketing Insider Group.

5 Reasons Automation is the New Reality in Digital Marketing published first on http://rssmix.com/u/11592782/rss.xml

[luxus4me]

SitePoint http://j.mp/2roJNqL

This post was originally published on Medium and reposted here with the author’s permission. Why not head on over there and give them some ❤️?

This tutorial will walk you through the full process of building a bitcoin bot with PHP – from setup, on to your first execution of an automated trade, and beyond.

Cryptocurrencies

I should not need to tell you but, a couple of months ago you could buy the cryptocurrency Ether for $11, it rapidly went up to $43 (I bought in between those prices) and has now gone to over $335 as of June 2017. Those kinds of gains are nearly unbelievable to a traditional investor and yet these are across the board in this space. Excited yet? So here is a scenario:

You made a ton of money on cryptocurrencies and have some concerns about shuffling it through your bank because of potential capital gains tax issues. There are places that have a solution for you if you want to be able to use this money for other investments. These places won’t make you photograph your license and send it in, just use an email and they provide you with a BTC deposit wallet, demo accounts, APIs, then when you are ready, you send money in and it’s ‘go time’, you can trade everything from treasury bonds to Forex using Cryptocurrencies as your base monetary instrument.

But, you say, I am a coder who likes to automate things, surely we can fire up some BTCbot and we can have it just do the work for us, it will make us millions in our sleep, right?

Probably not.

My solution

I don’t want to write a bot and publish it with a single strategy and just say “here, use this”, I don’t think that is helpful to anyone, I would rather give you the tools and show you how to write strategies yourself, show you how to set up data collection for the strategies and how to implement them in a trading system and see the results.

Also, I don’t want to create this in a new or arcane language, I want this written in PHP which the biggest number of people are familiar with and in a framework (Laravel – here’s a great premium course for sale, and a bunch of free articles if you’re not familiar with it) that is simple to use but powerful enough to let you can create what you need. If you think PHP is just for web pages, read on, this should surprise you.

I like to build systems. I have been working on this post for a while and it represents a good deal of non-derivative custom work. If you have read some of my other tutorials you know that I like to write tutorials that “I wish that I had found instead of having to to write”, so you are in for a thorough read, with a lot of copy-paste style recipes.

Let’s get started.

Steps we are going to take:

Get boilerplate/framework installed.

Walk through the core parts of the system, see what is where.

Install and configure the software we need.

Account creation at the brokerages we will be using, setting up the API keys for the scripts.

Run tests and examples.

Set up websocket streams to get data.

Finding strategies for our automated agents.

Deep dive into Indicators and Candles available to us.

Coding up our first agent.

Testing the agent.

A few closing words about the risks you are taking.

Get boilerplate/framework installed (Bowhead)

You can find the repository for the Bowhead boilerplate at it’s Github repository. It’s a full application already, but we’ll be using its functionality to get the stuff in this post done.

It is recommended you use the extremely Laravel-friendly Homestead Improved Vagrant box for a good, isolated development environment you can get started with in under 5 minutes. If you’re unfamiliar with Vagrant, here’s an excellent re-introduction, and if you’d like to dig deeper, this premium book will teach you amazing things.

git clone http://j.mp/2rp7sam cd bowhead composer install cp .env-example .env sudo pecl install trader echo "extension=trader.so" | sudo tee /etc/php/7.1/mods-available/trader.ini sudo phpenmod trader

Now let’s explain the the current folder structure of the app.

app/Console/Commands/

This is where all our console commands are located.

BitfinexWebsocketCommand.php – Stream market data from Bitfinex

CoinbaseWebsocketCommand.php – Stream market data from GDAX

ExampleForexStrategyCommand.php – Forex example strategy

ExampleStrategyCommand.php – Our example of a strategy

ExampleUsageCommand.php – Basic usage examples

GetHistoricalCommand.php – Pull in historic data from broker

OandaStreamCommand.php – Stream market data from Oanda

app/Util/

Is where all the utility classes that are available are found.

Bitfinex.php – Bitfinex API wrapper

BrokersUtil.php – Utilities for various brokers

Candles.php – All 60 TALib candle methods wrapped

Coinbase.php – GDAX API wrapper

Console.php – Console color, tables and progress

Indicators.php – 21 TALib indicators and moving averages.

Oanda.php – Oanda API wrapper

OneBroker.php – 1Broker API wrapper

Other.php – possible indicators, not implemented yet

testStrategy.php – Here is your test strategy

Whaleclub.php – Whaleclub API wrapper

app/Scripts

Extras and some testing data, these scripts are SKLearn price forecasting scripts taken from a study on beer consumption I thought was really useful, these might be used for market price predictions.

close_prediction.py – SKLearn script to predict a closing price

ohlc-btc.csv – Sample CSV data, if needed

open_prediction.py – SKLearn script to predict an opening price – a python script in the root dir called ‘streaming.py’ which is part of the Oanda streaming command.

If you execute php artisan, you should see something like the following, the part you are interested in is below.

Redis and MySQL

Redis really does not need any tweaking out of the box, it’s installed and ready if you’re using Homestead Improved.

MySQL will need a database and a few tables. Change the credentials in the .env file (create it from .env.example if it doesn’t exist).

DB_CONNECTION=mysql DB_HOST=localhost DB_PORT=3306 DB_DATABASE=homestead DB_USERNAME=homestead DB_PASSWORD=secret

Let’s add the DB dump into MySQL:

mysql -u homestead -psecret < app\Script\DBdump.sql

Open up the database in a tool like Sequel Pro and you will the sample data in the bowhead_ohlc (open, high, low, close) table.

API accounts we need in order to set up automated trading

Full disclosure: Where possible, I have set up bonuses for you on these links, all sites below offer free accounts which do not require ‘verification’ and do not require a deposit. The links are referral links which also bring me some perks if you sign up.

1) Whaleclub is the main site we want to trade on for this tutorial. They key their market data off of the Bitfinex websocket and match with Oanda streaming data for Forex. This site allows you to trade many instruments and commodities with BTC at up to 20x leverage, Forex up to 222x as well as providing BTC-based binary options. They have a simple, easy to understand interface and an excellent API. The API key is found by clicking on your name in the upper-right, and clicking on API. (use DEMO API key to start)

2) 1Broker the secondary site we want to trade on, they are similar to other BTC-based market makers and have a ‘trader follow’ system as well that is fairly interesting, particularly to get people following ‘you’. The API key is found on the right, just under the email icon, there is a small box with what looks like sliders on it, then click on Access & API Management.

3) Oanda is where we get our streaming Forex data, you need an account. API access is found here.

4) Coinbase/GDAX is what used to be called ‘Coinbase Exchange’ and is now called GDAX. I have been automated-trading there since they first opened. The API key is found at the far upper-right, then click on API and create your keys.

5) Bitfinex – you need an account here with an API key so we can get Cryptocurrency quotes. API keys are found under ‘Account’ then click on API.

6) Poloniex is like Bitfinex but supports many alt-coins. API keys are found under Settings – API Keys.

7) TradingView is not mandatory, but you will want an account there because all the indicators bowhead uses can be viewed on charts to help you build your strategies.

The reasoning behind this combination is that the Whaleclub and 1Broker APIs are rate limited, WC only allows 60 requests per minute, if we want to make sure we have streaming real-time data to work with we need to stream from a BTC brokerage. Same with Forex.

Definitely look around on these sites and see what they have to offer, I’ve been around the block with a lot of brokers and market maker sites and for BTC, these are all good as of June 2017. For Forex, Oanda is great, but for the purposes here of trading using BTC we just need their streaming Forex data.

Once you get the API keys for these sites, you will want to put them in your .env file.

NOTE: Start off by using DEMO/TEST API keys, DO NOT use real money API keys with untested trading scripts.

Let’s test that we are set up right.

Bowhead has a testing script to verify that everything is set up correctly and that you have the right API keys, PHP version and the Trader extension is correctly installed.

php artisan bowhead:example_usage

This script will stop on any issues that you may have and provide commands to run to fix the issues or links to get API keys you might still need.

Let’s get data flowing in

We have two things we need to do for data here so we can create an automated trading system that can trade both Crypto and Forex pairs. We will be using this data to trade on BTC market maker sites in real time.

Get streaming Forex data coming into our database from Oanda.

Get streaming Cryptocurrency data coming into our database from Bitfinex

Note: You should have the screen command installed on the server the app is running on. Screen is a terminal tool for detaching windows and keeping them running in the background. You can detach a screen, log off and come back and reattach to it from another location at another time.

screen python streaming.py screen php artisan bowhead:oanda_stream

This is what the Forex streamer looks like if you turn the echo back on.

Now if the Forex markets are open (U.S.A Eastern time, Sunday 5:00pm to Friday 4pm) you will start to see data flowing into the bowhead_ohlc table for the currency pairs that are traded on Whaleclub. The list is in streaming.py and can be modified there. The following pairs are all streaming into your database in real time now. USD_JPY, EUR_USD, AUD_USD, EUR_GBP, USD_CAD, USD_CHF, USD_MXN, USD_TRY, USD_CNH, NZD_USD

Now we have regular Forex data, lets add in the BTC/USD currency pair.

screen php artisan bowhead:websocket_bitfinex

Crypto markets are open 24/7 and you should begin to see current data flowing in immediately.

To see these running processes and reattach to them use screen -list and screen -r

~$ screen -list There are screens on: 4604.ttys005.Joels-MacBook-Pro-2 (Detached) 4636.ttys005.Joels-MacBook-Pro-2 (Detached) 4652.ttys005.Joels-MacBook-Pro-2 (Detached) 3 Sockets in /var/folders/bq/79z2kd916hbd39n5bckb5_s00000gn/T/.screen.

The numbers on the left are the screen IDs so in this instance you can reattach to the latest (Bitfinex) screen by using the following command.

screen -r 4604

We are only using screen for the purposes of this tutorial on a local machine, for a server environment we put these on supervisord to make sure they are always running on our server and if they die, then they are restarted.

This is the supervisord conf I use for this, you may need to change the directory for your user. From /etc/supervisor/conf.d/crypt.conf:

[program:oanda] command=/usr/bin/python streaming.py user=ubuntu directory=/home/ubuntu/bowhead startretries=3 stopwaitsecs=10 autostart=true [program:o_stream] command=/usr/bin/php artisan bowhead:oanda_stream user=ubuntu directory=/home/ubuntu/bowhead startretries=3 stopwaitsecs=10 autostart=true [program:wsbitfinex] command=/usr/bin/php artisan bowhead:websocket_bitfinex directory=/home/ubuntu/bowhead startretries=3 stopwaitsecs=10 autostart=true

You can see what these look like in Supervisor with

~$ sudo supervisorctl o_stream RUNNING pid 31644, uptime 1 day, 22:15:24 oanda RUNNING pid 31645, uptime 1 day, 22:15:24 wsbitfinex RUNNING pid 31646, uptime 1 day, 22:15:24 supervisor> help default commands (type help <topic>): ===================================== add exit open reload restart start tail avail fg pid remove shutdown status update clear maintail quit reread signal stop version supervisor>

note: Currently, bowhead only supports BTC/USD from Bitfinex, I will be adding ETH and LTC in future revisions. You can create an ETH version of this if you want by copying and modifying the BitfinexWebsockCommand.php file to use ETHUSD and renaming the class. You will need to add any new commands class to the $commands array in app/Console/Kernel.php

Finding strategies

So, we have our boilerplate/framework set up. We have accounts and we have data flowing into our database. We also have our indicator/signals and candles working. Let’s jump in and see how to create a very simple strategy.

Now that we see how we can use this, we need strategies and we need to know how to find more strategies. Quantopian is a great resource for strategies.

For instance, two that I was recently looking at: “Stocks On The Move” and “Trading on multiple TA-Lib signals” are both interesting, however saying we use TALib methods in bowhead, lets go with the latter, additionally this will only be for BTC as Oanda does not return Volume with forex pairs.

You will notice that this strategy uses three signals to determine if a stock (or in our case a pair) is overbought (sell) or underbought (buy).

Money flow index (mfi)

Commodity channel index (cci)

Chande momentum oscillator (cmo)

This is a simple technicals strategy where if all three of these indicators agree then we go the direction they say to go. Here is the core part of the strategy in code.

$indicators = new \Bowhead\Util\Indicators(); $recentData = $util->getRecentData('BTC/USD'); $cci = $indicators->cci($instrument, $recentData); $cmo = $indicators->cmo($instrument, $recentData); $mfi = $indicators->mfi($instrument, $recentData); /** instrument is overbought, we will short */ if ($cci == -1 && $cmo == -1 && $mfi == -1) { $overbought = 1; } /** It is underbought, we will go LONG */ if ($cci == 1 && $cmo == 1 && $mfi == 1) { $underbought = 1; }

Don’t worry about putting this anywhere, this strategy is included in bowhead as a console command

php artisan bowhead:example_strategy

NOTE: DO NOT RUN THIS ON YOUR LIVE ACCOUNT UNTIL YOU HAVE TESTED IT, USE YOUR DEMO API KEY TO START.

The output will look like this!

If you would like to see what these look like on a chart, then head over to TradingView and add the indicators. TradingView idea stream is another great place to find strategies and see what other people are doing and you can view the strategies in the source code section of of TradingView.

Bowhead Indicators and Candles

I provide two classes in bowhead for checking signals on data: Candles and Indicators. Each class has an all method which will run all the methods in its parent class over the data you provide.

To keep things as simple as possible without sacrifice of functionality all methods in both of these libraries provide a return as -1, 0 or 1. Where ‘1’ will always be the buy or ‘bullish’ side and ‘-1’ will always be the sell or ‘bearish’ side, where applicable. There are a couple which return -100 and 100 as returns, please read the comments above each method and in each class for more info about abnormal return values as there are links to explain what they do and why we use them as well as what they represent and how you can use them in your scripts.

Candles.php —  the allCandles() method will check for the presence of 60 specific candles across your dataset. It returns a complex array which will even provide the data point location of the candle and data points around the candle. For purposes of automated scripting, the current array in the return is the candles that are currently active.

Indicators.php —Provides multiple indicators over a dataset, these are all the common technical indicators such as Bollinger bands, RSI and many types of moving averages. These include overlap studies, momentum indicators, volume indicators and volatility indicators. There are no cycle indicators yet. The core methods are adx, aroonosc, cmo, sar, cci, mfi, obv, stoch, rsi, macd, bollingerBands, atr with MA methods of sma, ema, wma, dema, tema, trima, kama, mama, and t3 which can be combined using macdext() fairly dynamically.

SMA methods are typically called by themselves as they cannot respond with a buy or sell signal

These two sets of indicators and candles can be combined in many different ways that have been noted in the comments at the top of each class. Combining MA cross overs with Bearish/Bullish candle patterns (which would not be apparent to a moving average), you can pinpoint your entries and exits much better.

Packaging these trader methods in this way provides a lot of flexibility to you to be able to use them very easily and as you notice above, translating a strategy is very simple when you have only buy(1)/hold(0)/sell(-1) signals.

Code it up

So, lets do another quick script that will showcase what we do, this time lets do a Forex bot that trades all the pairs on WC, and it will use the following technical strategy.

Average directional movement index (ADX) is a trend indicator that typically returns a number from 0–100. Under 20 it indicates a weak trend, over 50 it indicates a strong trend. Bowhead returns a -1 for under 20 and a 1 for over 50;

Two simple moving averages, on period 6 and period 40. Period 6 SMA will follow the price very closely and just smooth out any spikes. An SMA 40 is a much more smoothed average which will cross the period 6 at various points when movements start taking place. The ADX is a check that we are indeed in a trend and not in a ranging (sideways) market.

When ADX registers a trend (over 50), and our SMA(40) down-crosses the SMA(6) we can buy as the trend is now moving up.

When ADX registers a trend and our SMA (40) up-crosses the SMA(6) we can sell as the trend is now moving down.

Here is what this looks like on TradingView, orange in the bottom is the ADX, the green line is the SMA(6) and the blue line is the SMA(40). You can see where you would most likely want to do your trades and lo and behold, we have some line crossings at or near those exact places.

Seems kind of complicated? Not when you are working in bowhead. The main thing is we need to get the data off the stack for checking previous and current values, that way you can tell when a moving average has crossed another moving average.

$recentData = $util->getRecentData($instrument); $adx = $indicators->adx($instrument, $recentData); $_sma6 = trader_sma($recentData['close'], 6); $sma6 = array_pop($_sma6); $prior_sma6 = array_pop($_sma6); $_sma40 = trader_sma($recentData['close'], 40); $sma40 = array_pop($_sma40); $prior_sma40 = array_pop($_sma40); /** have the lines crossed? */ $down_cross = (($prior_sma6 <= $sma40 && $sma6 > $sma40) ? 1 : 0); $up_cross = (($prior_sma40 <= $sma6 && $sma40 > $sma6) ? 1 : 0); Now you can just if ($adx == 1 && $down_cross) { $buy = 1; } if ($adx == 1 && $up_cross) { $sell = 1; }

Testing it

Okay, so I provided this as the following file, ADX will spit out errors (-9) without at least 21 data points, so keep that in mind.

app/Console/Commands/ExampleForexStrategyCommand.php ~$ php artisan bowhead:example_forex_strategy

This is what it looks like.

Closing words and a note about risk

Now you can find strategies and quickly build your own scripts to trade cryptocurrencies via technical indicators and candle patterns. The sky is the limit.

Because this is within the Laravel framework, you can create web pages to manage your automated trading, easily create strategies using web-based tools. You can use the queues and jobs system to have strategy ‘workers’ (I will be adding this as I update it), broadcasts, and so on.

Now to talk about risk.

I would like to point out that there is SUBSTANTIAL risk involved in cryptocurrency trading and you need to make sure you are in demo mode when testing and working out your strategies. This is of paramount importance as I would hate to hear of someone who lost any amount of money because of this.

I am personally fairly risk tolerant and sometimes it pays off. I use Bowhead to do WC ‘Turbo’ trading (which is Forex Binary options), these are a ‘guess’ if the price will be up or be down in 1 minute and 5 minute contracts. If you guess right then win up to 75% return, if you guess wrong then you lose your entire bet. There are some Forex strategies specifically for Turbo trading that I have had some good luck with. However, be aware that most require you are in a trending market. So an indicator like ADX on a longer period is not a bad choice.

Here is an example of one strategy that was working.

Final note

Part 2 will go over making your bot talk to all the exchanges and even attempt to discern price discrepancies, building real-time GDAX straddle-bot using about five Forex strategies and even setting up Bowhead as an API.

If you notice any errors here or have any issues with the code, please let me know, make a comment here or open an issue in the Github repository and I will address it.

— Keep in mind that this project is under active development.

http://j.mp/2roF3kZ via SitePoint URL : http://j.mp/2c7PqoM

[t-baba]

How to Build a Cryptocurrency Auto-Trader Bot with PHP? 💰

This tutorial will walk you through the full process of building a bitcoin bot with PHP - from setup, on to your first execution of an automated trade, and beyond.

Cryptocurrencies

I should not need to tell you but, a couple of months ago you could buy the cryptocurrency Ether for $11, it rapidly went up to $43 (I bought in between those prices) and has now gone to over $335 as of June 2017. Those kinds of gains are nearly unbelievable to a traditional investor and yet these are across the board in this space. Excited yet? So here is a scenario:

You made a ton of money on cryptocurrencies and have some concerns about shuffling it through your bank because of potential capital gains tax issues. There are places that have a solution for you if you want to be able to use this money for other investments. These places won’t make you photograph your license and send it in, just use an email and they provide you with a BTC deposit wallet, demo accounts, APIs, then when you are ready, you send money in and it’s ‘go time’, you can trade everything from treasury bonds to Forex using Cryptocurrencies as your base monetary instrument.

But, you say, I am a coder who likes to automate things, surely we can fire up some BTCbot and we can have it just do the work for us, it will make us millions in our sleep, right?

Probably not.

My solution

I don’t want to write a bot and publish it with a single strategy and just say “here, use this”, I don’t think that is helpful to anyone, I would rather give you the tools and show you how to write strategies yourself, show you how to set up data collection for the strategies and how to implement them in a trading system and see the results.

Also, I don’t want to create this in a new or arcane language, I want this written in PHP which the biggest number of people are familiar with and in a framework (Laravel - here's a great premium course for sale, and a bunch of free articles if you're not familiar with it) that is simple to use but powerful enough to let you can create what you need. If you think PHP is just for web pages, read on, this should surprise you.

I like to build systems. I have been working on this post for a while and it represents a good deal of non-derivative custom work. If you have read some of my other tutorials you know that I like to write tutorials that “I wish that I had found instead of having to to write”, so you are in for a thorough read, with a lot of copy-paste style recipes.

Let’s get started.

Steps we are going to take:

Get boilerplate/framework installed.

Walk through the core parts of the system, see what is where.

Install and configure the software we need.

Account creation at the brokerages we will be using, setting up the API keys for the scripts.

Run tests and examples.

Set up websocket streams to get data.

Finding strategies for our automated agents.

Deep dive into Indicators and Candles available to us.

Coding up our first agent.

Testing the agent.

A few closing words about the risks you are taking.

Get boilerplate/framework installed (Bowhead)

You can find the repository for the Bowhead boilerplate at it’s Github repository. It's a full application already, but we'll be using its functionality to get the stuff in this post done.

It is recommended you use the extremely Laravel-friendly Homestead Improved Vagrant box for a good, isolated development environment you can get started with in under 5 minutes. If you're unfamiliar with Vagrant, here's an excellent re-introduction, and if you'd like to dig deeper, this premium book will teach you amazing things.

git clone http://ift.tt/2rhggPO cd bowhead composer install cp .env-example .env sudo pecl install trader echo "extension=trader.so" | sudo tee /etc/php/7.1/mods-available/trader.ini sudo phpenmod trader

Now let's explain the the current folder structure of the app.

app/Console/Commands/

This is where all our console commands are located.

BitfinexWebsocketCommand.php - Stream market data from Bitfinex

CoinbaseWebsocketCommand.php - Stream market data from GDAX

ExampleForexStrategyCommand.php - Forex example strategy

ExampleStrategyCommand.php - Our example of a strategy

ExampleUsageCommand.php - Basic usage examples

GetHistoricalCommand.php - Pull in historic data from broker

OandaStreamCommand.php - Stream market data from Oanda

app/Util/

Is where all the utility classes that are available are found.

Bitfinex.php - Bitfinex API wrapper

BrokersUtil.php - Utilities for various brokers

Candles.php - All 60 TALib candle methods wrapped

Coinbase.php - GDAX API wrapper

Console.php - Console color, tables and progress

Indicators.php - 21 TALib indicators and moving averages.

Oanda.php - Oanda API wrapper

OneBroker.php - 1Broker API wrapper

Other.php - possible indicators, not implemented yet

testStrategy.php - Here is your test strategy

Whaleclub.php - Whaleclub API wrapper

app/Scripts

Extras and some testing data, these scripts are SKLearn price forecasting scripts taken from a study on beer consumption I thought was really useful, these might be used for market price predictions.

close_prediction.py - SKLearn script to predict a closing price

ohlc-btc.csv - Sample CSV data, if needed

open_prediction.py - SKLearn script to predict an opening price - a python script in the root dir called ‘streaming.py’ which is part of the Oanda streaming command.

If you execute php artisan, you should see something like the following, the part you are interested in is below.

Redis and MySQL

Redis really does not need any tweaking out of the box, it's installed and ready if you're using Homestead Improved.

MySQL will need a database and a few tables. Change the credentials in the .env file (create it from .env.example if it doesn't exist).

DB_CONNECTION=mysql DB_HOST=localhost DB_PORT=3306 DB_DATABASE=homestead DB_USERNAME=homestead DB_PASSWORD=secret

Let's add the DB dump into MySQL:

mysql -u homestead -psecret < app\Script\DBdump.sql

Open up the database in a tool like Sequel Pro and you will the sample data in the bowhead_ohlc (open, high, low, close) table.

API accounts we need in order to set up automated trading

Full disclosure: Where possible, I have set up bonuses for you on these links, all sites below offer free accounts which do not require ‘verification’ and do not require a deposit. The links are referral links which also bring me some perks if you sign up.

1) Whaleclub is the main site we want to trade on for this tutorial. They key their market data off of the Bitfinex websocket and match with Oanda streaming data for Forex. This site allows you to trade many instruments and commodities with BTC at up to 20x leverage, Forex up to 222x as well as providing BTC-based binary options. They have a simple, easy to understand interface and an excellent API. The API key is found by clicking on your name in the upper-right, and clicking on API. (use DEMO API key to start)

2) 1Broker the secondary site we want to trade on, they are similar to other BTC-based market makers and have a ‘trader follow’ system as well that is fairly interesting, particularly to get people following ‘you’. The API key is found on the right, just under the email icon, there is a small box with what looks like sliders on it, then click on Access & API Management.

3) Oanda is where we get our streaming Forex data, you need an account. API access is found here.

4) Coinbase/GDAX is what used to be called ‘Coinbase Exchange’ and is now called GDAX. I have been automated-trading there since they first opened. The API key is found at the far upper-right, then click on API and create your keys.

5) Bitfinex - you need an account here with an API key so we can get Cryptocurrency quotes. API keys are found under ‘Account’ then click on API.

6) Poloniex is like Bitfinex but supports many alt-coins. API keys are found under Settings - API Keys.

7) TradingView is not mandatory, but you will want an account there because all the indicators bowhead uses can be viewed on charts to help you build your strategies.

The reasoning behind this combination is that the Whaleclub and 1Broker APIs are rate limited, WC only allows 60 requests per minute, if we want to make sure we have streaming real-time data to work with we need to stream from a BTC brokerage. Same with Forex.

Definitely look around on these sites and see what they have to offer, I’ve been around the block with a lot of brokers and market maker sites and for BTC, these are all good as of June 2017. For Forex, Oanda is great, but for the purposes here of trading using BTC we just need their streaming Forex data.

Once you get the API keys for these sites, you will want to put them in your .env file.

Continue reading %How to Build a Cryptocurrency Auto-Trader Bot with PHP? 💰%

by Joel Degan via SitePoint http://ift.tt/2s1Qbaa