#so my ex! who was my first like serious bf and dumped me for no reason and then went around and had sex with a bunch of girls after texted

[herejusttosufferalong]

Y'all, I've been glued to this saga because L and R are so similar to what I went thru with my ex, like down to the sleeping on the couch thing, only reversed, that I don't know whether to laugh or cry. A and S don't know what they're in for.

Storytime: My ex's Rory is called Mike and they met playing a sport in college when X was a freshman and M was a super senior, so he's ~4 years older. M took X under his wing and they became bros for life I guess. M is super nice and goofy but a hot mess as a person, can't be trusted with the simplest of tasks but gets by by being beloved by everyone. X has consistently thrown him bones, brought him on to projects and recommended him for gigs at the expense of his own career and reputation. You can't make this shit up.

X and I were long distance for the first ~year of the relationship, I moved out to him to a small ass town an hour away from anywhere because of his job and because it was cheap. We were in a 1bd apartment and the first little while was bliss, hot and heavy, amazing. It was my first time living with a partner. Maybe a few months in, M calls X - he got a job in the city an hour away and he's moving down. X gets the brilliant idea to invite him to stay on our couch until he finds a place. I was fine with it at first because he was a super nice guy but I had no idea what I was getting into. Ladies, when I tell you I became the 3rd wheel in my own relationship and a ghost in my own home, I'm not being dramatic.

I was working from home so I was alone all day in a town where I knew no one who wasn't connected to X in some way and when the two of them would get home, they'd bro out with each other and I basically had to compete for my bf's attention. We stopped doing anything that didn't include him and constantly had to be mindful about how loud we were in the bedroom because he was on the fucking couch. I couldn't relax in my own home that I was paying rent and bills for. Mind you, M at this point was further along in his career than X and making way more money. Two months pass, he still hasn't found a place and instead commutes an hour each way to work. Then the fucking pandemic hits. I was the only one working initially and I was at home with the two of them playing video games, working out, watching TV, yelling, laughing, on TT, on Zoom with their other buddies 24/7 while I was trying to work. We'd constantly end up doing whatever they wanted to do. Dude stayed on our couch for like 10 1/2 months, only paying for groceries, takeout and activities here and there. I kinda snapped during the holidays, I drove across the country alone to be with my family and didn't go back, my dad then made a round trip to go get my stuff because I just couldn't even look at X. Only then did it occur to X and M that maybe M should move out. But you know what the narrative in his friend group is about me? That I'm a cold bitch who broke his heart.

I look back on it now and I'm angry at myself for being such a dummy, I was a total pushover. My X wasn't a bad dude, he was just too much of a bro to know how to be a bf. He always felt a need to include everyone but that cut into the little time we had together. In my defense, he was really hot lol.

It's crazy to think how different my life is now with my fiance, we just bought a house earlier this spring, which wouldn't have been possible with my X because he spends all his money on his hobbies. X literally did the same HBS thing L did after I dumped him, hit the gym like crazy, he follows like a thousand half naked girls on IG, likes all their posts and thirsts in the comments, it's beyond cringe. This is also on his fully public IG account that he also uses for work. He hasn't been in a serious relationship since, I'm told he's become quite the fboy, but he's collected a seemingly infinite amount of new bros judging by his posts. M is still in the picture, of course, although he has his own place and a serious gf now, while my ex has a new roommate who he plays an expensive, niche equipment sport with that he spends every penny he earns on. My ex was a Leo, so I'm not surprised L has it prominently in his chart.

This stuff is not uncommon among younger Millennial men. My now fiance is 5 years older and he is a Man. He shows up for me the way I show up for him, he doesn't make plans without considering me and he's on top of his finances. He's a serious person. I never knew I could be at peace like this. I know what I'm building towards with him. A and S are just sidepieces to the main love story that is L and R and if/when one of them gets dumped, the other one will as well. They're there because they go along with what L and R want. It'll come back to bite them in the ass but they'll learn an invaluable lesson the way that I did - don't date a manchild who won't prioritize you over his friends.

some good advice for the youngins

thank you for sharing 💜🥃

[tropicalscream]

cant sleep depressed and longing and wish I could have a relationship where i could get ti experience the joy of "firsts" again. first date, first kiss, etc

last relationship with ex bf just treated everything had like mundane and unnecessary. One of the major sticking points is I'm an ooey gooey cheesy romantic at heart. I love giving flowers for no reason, saying poetry, showering them in kisses, just holding hands and being clingy saying "I love you (romantically) " over and over bc each time saying it and hearing it makrs.me.giddy...

but

the viewd all of that with such disdain, would refuse to hold my hand in public, never wanted to do any dates either out or at home, never did foreplay or aftercare or would refuse to engage in sex outside just fuckin me

after not even a year of treating me like an dirty secret dumped me (and later implied they may have not seen menas a girl girl the whole time)

and ever since then well..

y'all know how my track record for dating/hookups/friendships have been ever since...

im so fuckin touch starved, and affection starved and attention starved and like yeah I'm horny and easy but

I've never been wooed, never got asked out on dates, never got the flowers, never been made to feel like a pretty girl, or even a girl someone is legitimately happy and excited to be with

and the vwry very few ppl who did didnt want anything serious or wasnt sexually compatible and like i know sex isnt the end all be all of things but

god i miss sex, i miss not being forced to compulsory Dom top, ive never had someone actually exploring my body with them and taking time to figure out whay makes me tick (I still dont even know how my transition body works)

i miss feeling wanted and loved snd desires and pursued

but looking back I realized I've never experienced any of that to even begin with...

[fgslt]

Hey Babe, I finally found a bottom for our 3some.

A Bottom? I thought we agreed on a Vers guy?

Well you see, there aren’t any Vers guys who are attracted to both of us.

What do you mean?

Babe, look at my pfp!

All Bottoms and Vers guys, even some Tops are going wild on me!

Then were is the problem in choosing a Vers?

Damn! You are the FUCKING PROBLEM!!!

Excuse me?

Excuse me!?! Yeah!!! No fuckable Vers wants to do you! No one likes your fem ass!

S-sorry I guess? i am sure there are some dudes out there, maybe they don’t text us cuss your pic is first!

For sure, there are guys asking for you! Especially old guys in their 60s and 70s. Oh and 3 obese guys and a frat bro.

See, a frat bro!

Yeah, ONE frat bro and he asked to pay me so there frat can use you for a golden shower in their initiation ritual.

I think you are getting unreasonable mean right now, but anyways… so there is a bottom who agreed. What does he look like?

Are you fucking serious? That’s my ex! Also he is not a bottom!

Well he wants to bottom for me.

Have you forgotten what he did to me? He called me a shitty fag and dumped me for being to fem.

Well maybe he was right.

Is…is this how you think?

Kind of! Look you have been my first bf and I thought a gay couple should have some sort of … woman… but now I realize that I don’t have to settle for a sissy. I am hot! I am masc! And I can do better than you! I can go Masc4Masc.

OmG, please don’t break up with me 😭🙏🏻

I think I should fag.

Please babe, I do anything for you.

Well maybe you would like to become our houseboy?

Yes!!!!

And you will call your ex Master!

What? No!

Than I dump you.

Okay, I will call him Master.

And you will tell him every morning that he was way to hot for you!

Yes.

And that you are happy to serve him after all!

Yes.

[alsjeblieft-zeg]

073 of 2024

Getting on a personal level.

Created by shestoohonest

Stage one: Emotions. How often do you take actions you regret?

Rarely, but not gonna lie, it happens.

Do you often feel guilty?

Yeah. I tend to feel guilty of everything.

Do you have a short temper?

Yeah. It's not hard to get me irritated.

When was the last time you lashed out at someone?

Long time ago.

And why was that?

I don't remember, honestly.

Does it always seem like the entire world is out to get you?

No. I just don't care.

Have you ever had a serious mental break down?

Yeah, a few times. Thankfully not more.

What led up to this? (sadness, depression, fury, confusion, etc)

Lack of stability and the death of my beloved cat.

Do you believe it is just natural for humans to feel lonely?

It's been said that we're social, but then, not everyone is extroverted and not everyone is introverted. It depends on a person.

Do you ever feel lonely, even in the presence of those you know or love?

Yeah, sometimes.

Do you believe that these are the "best years of your life"?

Certainly filled with more appreciation.

Or do you follow the "the best is yet to come" philosophy?

No, not really. I'm optimistic, but I try to live day by day.

Does it sometimes feel like your life is being wasted or not going anywhere?

Not anymore. Having my incident has made me realise some things.

Tell me about the last time you were truly, truly happy.

When my kitty Victoria was born. She was my most loved cat ever.

Stage two: Relationships. How long was your longest relationship?

6 years and counting.

How old were you when you had your first boyfriend or girlfriend?

20 or 22, I don't remember well anymore.

Do you (or have you ever) had feelings for the SAME sex?

Always. I never fell for a girl.

Do you consider yourself gay or bisexual? How strongly do you feel about it?

I'm a gay ace, that's just it. I don't overthink it, it's just who I am.

Have you ever had your heartbroken?

Yeah, two times.

Did you ever honestly believe you were going to marry your highschool bf/gf?

I've never had high school love, not to mention there's no such thing as high schools in my education system.

Is it harder to get dumped or do the dumping?

Both are hard, although I've never experienced one of these.

Have you been able to stay good friends with any of your exes?

Yeah, Nielsje is still one of my best friends.

If so, is there any tension (sexual or not) between the two of you?

No. We're just friends. We love each other, but in platonic way.

Does it seem like "all the good ones are taken"?

No, it's rather "all the interesting guys are straight" XD

Would you ever date someone that your friend liked or HAD dated?

I mean, love doesn't choose. But I'm not that easy to fall for others.

When was the last time you were kissed?

Today.

Are you a virgin? Do you believe virginity is "sacred"?

No and no, but I just rather not care about it.

How many times have you been in love? Was it always real?

Three times, but only once for real. That's what I think anyway.

Stage three: Friendships. Would you say that you have a lot of friends?

Not a lot. Time always verifies who is the real friend.

Have you ever been considered to be a "loner"?

Yeah, when I was younger.

How often do you hang out with your friends?

Every once n a while.

Do you have a specific hang out or house that you go to?

Yea, we mostly go to Brussels.

Have you ever done anything illegal to help a friend?

No, I don't think so.

If not, would you be willing to? What would be your limit?

Never thought about it.

Who is your best friend? VERY best. Choose.

My husband. It was easy.

Have any of your friends ever stabbed you in the back?

Yeah. And then they blamed me.

Did you forgive them? Are you still friends?

No. I don't give a shit anymore.

Are your friends the only people that "get you"?

Sometimes.

Do you think your friends know you better than your own parents?

It's hard to say, really. My mum doesn't know me at all.

Have you ever lost a close friend because they died?

If animals count, I just lost my beloved feline friend last year and I'm still not over it.

Have you ever lost a friend because they gained a bf/gf and dropped you?

Yeah, kind of. I moved on.

Are your friends your support system? =]

Otherwise they wouldn't be called friends, right?

Stage four: Family Life Are both your parents alive?

Yes, they are.

Were you raised by your biological parents?

Yeah. They've been married for 35 years, too.

Has your family ever been broken?

Not that I know of.

Do you think your parents respect your space?

My dad does, my mum didn't. She doesn't even seem to know what privacy is.

Are you close with you siblings, if you have any?

Yes. Me and my sister are really close.

How often does your family fight or have big arguments?

Not often, but yeah, it happens sometimes.

Does your family hold very high religious beliefs?

They do, but my parents don't practice. I come from mixed religion family, too.

Are you the "black sheep" of your household?

I was to some family members and my mum lol.

Have you ever in anger told your parent(s) that you hated them?

No, never.

How often are you diciplined or punished or grounded?

I don't even live with my parents and I'm too old for that anyway.

Do you feel like you are allowed to express yourself inside your own home?

Yeah, why wouldn't I.

Are your parents very controlling of the person "they want you to be"?

My mum was controlling, my dad has always been laid back.

Your family really does love each other, doesn't it?

Hm. Better stay silent :P

Are you planning to move away when you turn 18?

I'm 34. Big shock yeah :P

[soleilees]

bruh y/n wants what i have stg😳😳

[tatlandtaelsurveys]

Twenty

Are you happy with the way things are going at the moment? If not, what’s the problem?

Mhhhhh as far as my attitude and my perspective of things as far as being in a better places, yes. My relationship is good and definitely am glad not to be as jealous. But I would like to move out and not be with my parents and be more financially stable..I want to do more with my life.

Have you ever kissed someone whose name started with a letter P? I have not no.

Did you talk to one of your best friends today? What did you talk about? Just texting about dropping her off some coffee.

Do you get on better with funny or serious people? A sense of humor or some sort. I am not great with stern and serious people.

What is something you’re good at? Piano.

Do you still speak to the person you fell hardest for? Yes :D.

Do you have mood swings around the time of the month? Not really but I mean the cramps put me in a less energetic mood.

Have your friends met the last person you kissed? Yes. He is part of the friend group. We were all friends first and then he and I started dating.

How old is your oldest cousin? Pfttt 40′s, in their 40′s somewhere.

If you’re straight, have you ever thought about kissing the same sex? If you’re gay, have you ever thought about kissing the opposite sex? I have thought about kissing the same sex and am interested what it’d be like.

What if you saw your best friend holding hands with your ex? Uh it depends on context. Like if we were playing a group game where we held hands, like that one you untangle yourself as a group, that’s not problem. If it was just because, I obviously wouldn’t like it. But I would probably ask him calmly first.

Your last relationship, who dumped who? We kind of both were at a point we knew it was failing and mutually ended it. However, when we started talking again a year after we broke up, had sex he decided to tell me he didn’t mean for us to talk to each other go this far. SO, I told him let’s just stop talking and move on with our lives. 

How old were you when you had your first boyfriend/girlfriend? Hahaha 12. But if you don’t count. it, I was 16.

Do you have chocolate in your house? YES a bowl and it’s so dangerous I keep going back for more.

What does your laugh sound like? Do you have a loud laugh or a quiet laugh? I find my laugh to be weird but been told it isn’t. Sometimes I do this weird laugh and am like where did that come from, like a e hehehe. I wouldn’t say my laugh is loud.

Do you have a friend whose name begins with a K? Tell me about him/her. Yes. Katelyn and we met in anime club and she would be my drinking person that pumped me up to want to drink haha. She is really nice.

Do you think the last person you texted loves you? Yes :) he is my bf.

What color is your phone? Purple.

What’s the closest object to you that’s green? The light green on the blanket underneath me.

Which of your friends lives the closest to you? Haha I guess one if she lived back at home. 

Is there a reality TV show you would consider taking part in? Comedy or challenges.

Have you ever fallen out of love with someone? Why do you think your feelings for that person changed? I moved on. 

Is your home town nice? It’s pretty and has it’s beauty of scenery is nice.. Otherways it’s ok.

What if you got stuck in a lift with the last person who Facebook messaged you? We’d kiss, be silly, kiss some more and try to get ourselves out of the lift

Anyone toying with your emotions? No.

When/where did your last hug take place? My room, my brother stopped by and gave me a gift and I gave him a hug.

Do you consider yourself mature enough to make your own decisions? Hahahaha I spend too much. But in more ways, yes. I don’t always know if I am making right decisions or not. To be an adult.

Have your parents ever told you about their love lives, and any previous relationships they had before they met? Yes. My parents are childhood sweethearts but they talked about crushes and dates. Especially my mom but I enjoy telling stories too.

Who has made the biggest difference in your life? My boyfriend. Moving here.

You get a text from someone saying that they want to hang out - who would you most like it to be from? One of my friends.

Do you and your friends have any inside jokes? Hahaha. Black card deck.

Do you think someone has feelings for you? Are these feelings returned? Yes my boyfriend. I love him :).

What if the last person you texted were to ask you out? He might do a shocked face or blush face.

Do you believe in love at first sight? Explain. I don’t, In love at first I don’t see it. I think being mesmerized and intrigued is strong but not knowing the person, I think you can love things about them, or care deeply for them but not be IN love with them.

What kind of programs does your significant other/crush like to watch? Do you like them too, or would you prefer to watch something else? A lot of online anime, and throw back shows he grew up with. We watch throwback stuff and reminisce a lot. He has his shows he likes as well I have mine.

Can you remember what color underwear you wore yesterday?

It was white with small pink polka dots. Would you prefer to be somewhere else right now? If so, where? And why would you prefer to be there? I am content atm.

When you listen to music, do you ever find that the songs affect your moods and change how you feel? Hahaha yes like I find the songs if I want to cry or songs if I want to think of random scenarios.

Can you remember what you dreamed about last night? OMG. So not last night, even though I told my boyfriend this morning. The night before though....I was at this school and on our field trip we had tasks and this lady was killing of people. If we didn’t do it right or broke a rule. It was disturbing. I get these dreams where I am controlled or tortured and I don’t know where they come from.

Where is the person you want to see? At his apartment.

Do you believe that you’re a good person? Yes.

What would you say is your biggest achievement in life so far? What else do you hope to achieve in the next few years? Studying abroad, working on myself, kind of..um. Working and switching jobs because I was unhapoy at my previous job and I was stuck. Felt stuck.

What do you have planned for this evening? Watch a Jdrama or anime.

[sometimes-i-write-4-you]

I was wondering if you could do a John B one where he is jealous of the reader and her boyfriend and wishes he would leave the friend zone. Then one night or day something happens that causes John B to comfort the reader and she sees that John B was there all along.

only one for me - John B x redaer

triggers: cheating bf (not our John B of course)

--

(y\n) and John B were always friends. They knew each other for such a long time, (y\n) saw him as a brother. John B, however, saw her in a different light. They were 14 when he realized that.

"I can't wait to see (y\n) today, I miss her" said the young boy with the brown hair. "do you like.. like-like her?" his blond best friend asked. "I don't think so, I just wanna hug her already, haven't seen her in a while" John B replied, and the third boy laughed. "dude, to me it sounds like you like-like her" JJ said, and Pope nodded. "I can't believe I'm saying that, but JJ is right" he said. "no guys, it's normal. I want to hug my friend, cause I miss her" John B insisted.

She finally arrived at John B's to hang out. John hugged her, like kids do, but then he realized he doesn’t want to ever let go.

She wasn't really a part of the group, but she hung out with them a lot, especially during Kie's Kook year, then it was her turn to branch out. He couldn't use the "no pogue on pogue macking" as an excuse really, but he did. He used every single one until it was too late, and she met Gabriel.

Gabriel was a Kook, but she met him at a beach party and they didn't know about the social status difference until later, when they exchanged numbers and his phone was the newest iPhone and her's a Xiaomi. Neither of them cared, at least not enough to ignore the connection, and they started dating soon after. Their friends did care, but love is stronger than anything, right? Wrong.

She was hanging out with Gabriel's friends – drinking, talking smoking and whatever. "so, Gabriel, how's Rosemary liking (y\n)? like, is she not worried (y\n\n) is a just a gold digger? Because I know (y\n\n)'s great, however…" Alice said, sipping on her cocktail. She was laying on the hammock in Gabriel's back yard next to the pool. "she hasn't met her yet" Gabriel replied, flipping the burgers for the BBQ. "oh" Alice said, smiling her devilish smile. "I'm going to, right? Tonight" (y\n) said, "we said I'm staying for dinner". "sure babe" Gabriel said, kissing his girlfriend of 3 months.

"you two are so cute, like Romeo and Juliet or Tony and Maria" Alice said, hiding her hatred towards the couple in her sweet tone. She liked Gabriel, obviously, but that was exactly the problem. "you know that it's basically the same, right? Arthur Laurents based 'west side story' off of Shakespeare's original story" (y\n) corrected Alice. "how do you know it wasn't Shakespeare who copied from Arthur?" Alice said, trying to prove her smarts but failing miserably. "because west side story's first production was after Shakespeare died" Gabriel replied, laughing, "Alice, you truly shock me with your brain". "whatever, nerds" Alice sighed, sipping on her drink once again.

"let's play 7 minutes in heaven" offered one of the guys. If (y\n)'s memory was correct, he was Don. Or was it Daniel? Or was Don the other Blond guy, and this was Ernie?

"Don, we're not 14, we don't need a game to kiss someone" said the other Blond guy, Ernie. (y\n) smiled at her small victory of remembering the names of her new circle. "I'm down" Alice smiled, "I'll make the notes" she added as she got up, and Ernie changed his mind. "yeah, ii guess it can be really fun" he said, scratching the back f his head. Alice rolled her eyes at the love-struck boy and took a notebook and a pen out of her bag to make the notes.

-2 hours later-

John B stood in his kitchen, staring at the nearly expired rice and tying to remember how to make it. With his dad away, he should probably learn how to make food, right?

A knock on the door made him smile. Hopefully it will be one of his friend who can make food, or even better – one if his friends with food. He opened the door almost too fast, the smile on his face turning to a look of worry at the sight of crying (y\n).

Before he got to ask what's going on, the red-eyed girl wrapped her hands around him and pushed her head against his shirts. He felt her tears being soaked in his shirt, and rested his hand on her back, shushing her softly. "hey" he said, hand reaching for her cheeks to both wipe away the tears and make her look at him. "hey" he repeated to remind her to turn her eyes to him. she finally looks at him.

"what happened, (y\n\n)?" he asked, "tell me what happened" he added. They stood at the door, quietly, still sort-of-hugging. She broke the hug to walk into the house and sat down on the couch. "Gabriel" she said, "he— we were at a house party, and then— we—well, one of the guys offered to play 7 minutes in heaven and I got Don and he tried to kiss me but I was like… no, cause you know, I'm dating his friend, but when he got Alice… when Gabriel and Alice went into the closet, they—" (y\n) said. John B sat down by her side, pulling her into him. she leaned her head on his shoulder. "I can't believe he kissed another girl when he has you" John B said, even though he could defiantly believe it. He never liked Gabriel, and now he had a good reason. Stealing the girl that was never really his is not a good enough reason.

"if you were my girl, I'd never do that" he said quietly, tempted to tell her she should be. "yeah, you're a great guy" she said, "I don't deserve to be your friend". "of course you do, you deserve everything" John said, "you're a great person, and you shouldn't let stupid Gilbert make you think differently". "his name is Gabriel" (y\n) corrected, "like the angel. His parents gave him the wrong name, he's no angel" she sighed. "but you are, so don't let him make you cry" John insisted, stroking her side to comfort her. She slowly calmed down, but he had to ask something. "so you two are done?" he asked. she nodded, "yeah, I dumped his ass right in front of his friends. Most of them laughed, but Alice seemed satisfied" (y\n) said. Her phone ringed.

Don (?): hey, now that you are single, wanna reclaim you're 7 minitues in heaven? 😉

John laughed at the text; both did. "this is ridicules" he said, "I mean, wow". "yeah" (y\n) said, "wanna help me reply?" she asked, biting her lip. The perfect payback. "uh, yeah?" John said, half-asking. She opened the camera and made him turn to her. Face to face. They were close, and John B found it hard to resist temptation, but turns put he doesn't need you. (y\n)'s lips locked with his for a split second, and she sent the picture to Don.

"what the fuck?" John said, a little pissed. His dream came true, but this is not how he imagined their first kiss to be. He had this whole thing planned out where he'll tell her to close her eyes because he has a surprise and then he'll kiss her. "I'm not a toy for Kooks to pass around, I'm done with those fart boys-" "you mean frat boys?" "-no, fart boys, because they stink" she said, making John B to laugh even though he wanted to be mad at her.

"just.. look, (y\n), you can't go around kissing people as pay back on your ex, I have feelings. Give me a heads up next time" he sighed. "don't be a baby, it's not like I was leading you on for a moment there, right?" she said, wiping away her tears. John looked at her, and she realized something. well, two things to be exact.

One – his eyes had a pain she recognized from the mirror she looked at on the way here to see how ugly crying made her. The pain of understanding the person you love doesn’t love you as much. Second thing was is beautiful, kind and he's always there for her. It was always him.

"I was, wasn't i? shit man" she laughed sadly, "good job, me". "it's okay, I guess. My bad for never telling you" he said. "no, I fooled myself, not you" she says. He looked at her confused. "let me make it up to you" (y\n) smiled, ignoring John's confusion. Her hand reached for his cheek to pull him as close as possible, and her lips crashed against his. He kissed back without questioning it, until he started to overthink.

"wait, are you just looking for something because of Gabriel, or is this for real?" he asked, pulling away. "for real, John B, as real as it gets. I'm kind of stupid for never seeing that you were the only one for me" (y\n) said, slightly offended. Her serious tone convinced John B, and led to understand she likes him back. Finally. He smiled and pulled her back into the kiss.  

[cloudykaii]

In The Wrong Direction

pairing: jeon jeongguk x reader

summary:  Sorry I love angst😂can I request 14 16 112 with jungkook where yn is best friends w him then he starts ignoring her bc he gets a gf so he ignores her so she gets a bf to distract herself but he turns out to be abusive ? (If ur comfortable w abuse!) warnings: mentions of abuse (not descriptive but still), swearing, please be careful I tried to make it as unintense as possible but its still pretty degrading, the reader’s way of thinking is warped due to the way she’s been treated

14. “Can you shut up for once in your life?” / 16. “Are you hurt?” “No.” “Then why are there bruises all over your face?” / 112. “Stop it you’re bleeding.”

“You need to move on,” your friend had told you. “I know a guy I can set you up with, you just need to forget him.”

At the time it had been easy to listen to her, the idea of forgetting your best friend seemed so appealing. After all, it had become so exhausting, battling away the insecurities you felt about not being good enough every time he left you on delivered, or declined your calls, or lied to avoid seeing you. You had just wanted the heartbreak you felt at the idea of your best friend, the guy you’ve had feelings for for so very long, having a girlfriend that seemed to be replacing you to end. 

Now, you wished you hadn’t shoved down your urge to try your best to remain his friend so easily. The guy your friend had introduced you to, wasn’t who you thought he was. At first, he was practically perfect. He called you when you felt down, texted you randomly to keep the conversation going, opened doors for you, told you you were special. It only took about a month and a half, around three weeks after officially making you his girlfriend, for his true colors to show. 

Which led to where you are now, wincing in the mirror as you did your best to dab lightly to bend your makeup to cover your bruises. You weren’t stupid, you knew you should leave. You just didn’t know how. It wasn’t like you could just walk up to him and say, “I’m breaking up with you.” There was no telling what he would do. 

You were interrupted from your train of thought when a series of knocks sounded on the door. “Just a minute!” You double checked your reflection in the mirror before going to open the door. You almost fell back when you opened the door to reveal Jeongguk himself on the other side. “What are you doing here?”

Your voice came out softer than you wanted, but you weren’t even sure what to say to him as he stood on the other side of the threshold, his hands nervously stuffed into his pockets as he looked up at you with a look you couldn’t figure out. “Can I come in?”

Your mouth was still open in thinly veiled shock, but you still found yourself moving to the side  so he could come in. He strode past you, looking around like he hadn’t seen the inside of your apartment multiple times before. Granted, it did look different, even to you, ever since you were forced to take down all the you had of you and Guk. 

He visibly winced when he noticed. “I see you’ve changed your place up a little bit.” His eyes fell, and you saw the uncomfortable frown on his face. You followed his gaze to the framed picture of you and your boyfriend on the wall. “I forgot about him. I thought Jin hyung was joking when he told me about you getting a boyfriend. Guess I should have seen it coming, after all-”

“Jeongguk, what are you doing here?” Your voice was still quiet, almost timid even, as you cut him off. 

You watched him sigh and retreat back into himself. “I just missed my best friend. I needed you.”

You felt a tightness in your chest, like you were about to cry. “I needed you, too,” you whispered. “But you left.”

“Y/N, it wasn’t how you thought it was. I just got so tired of you not being able to return my feelings, and Jimin suggested that I needed a distraction, and then I met her, and she seemed like the perfect way to try to move on from you.”

He needed to move on from you? He thought you couldn’t return his feelings? This conversation was giving you so many plot twists that all you could do was stand there and stare at him as he continued, “And I’m sorry to dump all of this on you, but you’re my best friend. You’ve been there for me more than anyone I know. I’ve missed you so much, and if me liking you makes you uncomfortable in any way-”

“Can you shut up, for once in your life?” You interrupted him. What were you supposed to say though? You didn’t know, but despite everything you still managed to speak, the tears that had welled up in your eyes earlier finally spilling over. “You have feelings for me?” 

You didn’t wait for his response. “It hurt so much to learn that you had a girlfriend, because I’ve liked you for so long, and just when I started thinking that the possibility of you liking me back wasn’t so unrealistic, she came in,” you scoffed. “And she was perfect. She was sweet, and even called me sometimes to talk. I couldn’t hate her, not just because she hadn’t done anything, but because she was literally perfect. And then I heard she cheated on you, but you had been avoiding me for so long, I didn’t know if it would be a good idea to pick up the phone or not.”

“And now you have a boyfriend,” he scoffed, turning so that his body fully faced yours.

You wiped at your eyes, unsure of how to tell him that you wished you could leave him. How were you supposed to say that no matter what, he would always have your heart? Apparently you didn’t need to, because suddenly straightened up, striding over to you. Halfway there, he asked you, “Are you hurt?”

You frowned. “No.”

“Then why are there bruises all over your face?” Your eyes widened. You had rushed to finish your makeup when he had knocked, the concealer must have been cried off. “I’m fine,” you tried to say as you turned away, but all you managed to get out was “I-” before you burst into sobs. 

He turned you face him with a gentle hand on your shoulder, before cupping your face to look closer. “Come on, you’re bleeding.” He tugged you to your bathroom, before pulling out your first aid kit. You shouldn’t have been surprised that he remembered where it was. 

He cleaned up the cut on your cheekbone softly, eyes focused. “It was him, wasn’t it? Don’t lie to me, the proof is in the hole in your living room wall that you obviously failed to cover up.”

You stared at your legs, trying to figure out what to say. “Yeah,” you finally decided. “It was him. He realized I have feelings for you, and didn’t really like that, because I was lucky he decided to love me.”

He threw away the wet tissue he had used to clean up the blood. “That’s ridiculous. Anyone would be lucky to love you. You’re the best person I know.”

You found yourself letting a scoff, and he shook his head, “I’m serious. I am so in love with you it makes my head spin, and I know you deserve everything beautiful. I just wish you still saw that, too.”

“I love you too,” You chewed your lower lip. “But I can’t do this, not with-”

“Your ex boyfriend? Oh, don’t look at me like that, did you honestly think I would let this relationship continue after learning what’s going on? Before I fell in love with you, I was your best friend.”

Honestly, no. You didn’t expect him to, you just weren’t sure what you were supposed to do now. “Should I.. pack a bag or something?” Your confusion was evident on your face as you struggle to understand what was running through Jeongguk’s head. 

He scoffed this time, “The lease to this apartment is in your name. You’re not leaving your own home. No, we wait for him to get back, I kick his ass, and you move on with your life in a happily ever after that doesn’t include anyone degrading you or your sense of self worth. You go back to being the most badass person I know, and the person I’m in love with, then we move on from there.”

There seemed like a lot could go wrong with that plan, but he was right, and you appreciated it. It would take some time, because even though you loved him like he loved you, you had some wounds within yourself to fix, but at least you weren’t alone. You had moved on, just in the wrong direction, but that was okay because now you had him to help you come back. 

[sinhnhi678]

His Majesty's Dark Queen Chap 3

Note: yeah, got me whole week to write this chap. It's like 4A.M in my country now, and I'm still typing :D Oh and I forgot to introduce the background of the series. Let's assume everything in this fanfic is just like the main series, except that Star doesn't erase magic in the end, okay? Good. Now, let's enjoy chapter 3 ^^

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“So, what's that all about?” In the end, Tania can’t just let her friend out of the bar, and because this time seems kinda serious. She gets Tom the “dumped-seat” then comfort him.

“About what?”

“The GIRL, man!! The GIRL! It must be a girl, who dumped you, so you were so sad like this! No, this time must be very serious. I have never seen you sad like this ever since… since… you broke up with that Nana…”

“It’s Jana.”

“…. That Jana. The weird lady from Erath, you said. Man, maybe I have never met your Starship and know about you two’s past, but I've heard enough about your Janna. You two were like… born for each other. What could be better suited for a demon, like a demon lover? You talked to me about Jana like this, Jana like that. You were so happy, I thought when I finally get a chance to met your girlfriend, is when I received the wedding invitation. But then you came here, told me that she broke up with you, and you was sad for a long time. I also had to take you to places like Amethyst Arcade or Quest Buy to make you feel better, even introduce you new girlfriend. It took you half a year to get over it.” Tania tried to sound dramatic. She stretched her voice, deliberately pressing, waving, rolling her eyes. Tom could not resist this, hugging his stomach and laughing non-stop. Tania is always a caring friend, she does not care about her image getting worse, every time Tom is sad, she always uses this way to comfort and make fun of Tom. And it works every time. That is the first step.

“Stop, Tania, stop. You crack me up!!!” Tom tries to stop laugh, “And… what makes you think this time is worst like that?”

“The eyes, my friend. You can try to look sad, try to look happy, but your eyes always tell me the truth. That’s the reason I make friends with you in the first place. Because there is no way a ‘heartless demon’ can have eyes like that. Your three eyes, especially this one,…” Tania pointed to her forehead, “are very honest. Outsiders might think every time you broke up, you sad the same way. But those eyes tell me when you really sad, or just annoyed.”

“This is the reason why sometimes I said I just got dumped, but you still kick me out?”

“Yes. Because your eyes said you just a little bit annoyed, so I just kick you out. No one can stand after see their friends broke up like… 4 or 5 times in one month, you know? It’s very annoying. I am your friend, not your mama, remember that.”

“I guess. But you are the only one left I can talk, literally. I have few friends, but only two of them are my BF. One is very busy with her life, I can’t just chat with her hours about my relationship like that…”

“And you think I can?”

“Tania, that’s Star. She’s my ex. Even now we are friends, but I still can’t talk with her about that stuff.”

“Good point. And what about another one? If I remember correctly, that’s a he, right? What his name again? Ma… Marcus…? No.. no… co… MARCO! Right, Marco. Why wouldn't you told to him? He is, well, a guy. Sure, he has a feeling for your Starship, but you said you are cool with that, and this thing is 5 years so far, and you two still be friends. Why not?” And there we go, step 2: Make Tom said the problem. Make he feels comfortable, then draw a way so he could go with the flow, says the problem so Tania can help him. Usually, this step took quite a lot of time, since Tom is just want drinking and whining, avoiding the problem, having to lure him to say it takes half a day. But this time, Tania did not expect Tom to speak from the beginning.

“The truth is…” Tom stopped talking. He closed his eyes, rubbed his face, took a deep breath, and sighed, seemingly pondering something extremely difficult to say. “The truth is… I'm here today has something to do with him.”

“Shit!” This is what Tania doesn't want to hear the most. “This is worse than I thought!” She thinks. In fact, Tania didn't really understand Tom's romantic relationships before the two knew each other. Tom didn't tell, and neither did Tania because she knew it was a sensitive issue. That great battle took many people away, some lost their loved ones, some lost their possessions, Tania herself struggled hard to rebuild her Lily Dog bar. As for Tom, he didn't tell much about it, but Tania sensed that he seemed to have lost himself in the great battle. He still looks normal, but Tom's change in such a short time cannot be due to the fact that he is trying to be an intern king, only love. From a kid who was grumpy all day with everything (despite trying to be normal), he turned into a calm gentleman, only talk to solve the problem. Maybe for Tania, Tom has always kept the attitude as when he first befriended her, warm and cheerful, but with strangers, his attitude and way of talking are different. He is calm and aloof when talking to them, even talk to them in a voice has a semi-sarcastic style imbued with nobility to normal people, like in the movie. “This love triangle thing is really troublesome!!” Look what it did to Tom, made he looks miserably.

Miss Star Butterfly is a trouble-maker. But this Marco boy is also one, too. Tania only knows him through Tom’s story. She gave a good impression with him at first. To Tom, he is a dear friend, the one who always helps him to keep calm, when he needs and has the same hobby with him. Even when he was dating Janna, the conversation between Tom and Tania always have Marco in it, more or less. If it wasn't for Tom dating only girls, Tania thought he had something with Marco. But then, Tom starts to open with her, starts to talk about his relationship with those two. It’s broke his heart to realize that he and Star can’t belong to each other anymore, and the fact that she and his best friend have “a thing”. He chooses to broke-up with her, told them he is cool with this, hopes them would go on with each other. Poor little one still tries to smile with those two. “I swear to God, I gonna kill that damn brat right…”

“Four days ago, me and he met. We drank and talked about the old days. I don’t know how, but we end up have sex.” Tom confessed.

The silence is in the air.

“Have sex… with who?” Take long enough for Tania to dare ask him again.

“With Marco.” He answered softly.

“Ho… ho… How?? How??” Tania can’t believe what she just hears.

“I don’t know. We were drunk, and… and… Love Sentence! Tania, it’s Love Sentence! Everything was dizzy. I'm pretty sure he took the initiative first, but it was me who did the last step. I mean, how could I not? He looked cute at that time. And honestly, I've wanted to do that to him for a long time...” Tom kept on babbling and dreaming about that night, unaware that Tania was having a huge shock at his side. “This can be true!” Tania denied, “If it’s true, then…” the whole thing about love triangle that she knew, the whole time, will completely different. She quickly squeezed his shoulders, turned him back to her, asking slowly: “Tom, dear! So, what are you saying, is you have feelings for him? For… that Marco boy?”

Tom did not answer immediately but looked directly at Tania. In his eyes filled with many things, there is heartache, there is love, there are concerns, feeling like about to spill out of the eyes.

"You DO have feelings for that boy." Tania did not need Tom to speak, his eyes answered for him. She let go of his shoulders, immersing herself in her thoughts. She knew Tom had suffered because of that relationship, she also blamed the other two for making Tom change himself so much like that. But what Tania can’t think to, even in her wildest dreams, Tom is indeed being hurt by that love, but not because the person he loves cheats on him with his best friend, it rather because he has feelings for that friend. But, for how long? Since when did he have that kind of feeling? Is it ever since that great battle? Or, worse, even earlier? She didn’t dare to think. How did her friend, after all, endure himself so he could suppress his emotions all those years? “Oh, Tom…” There are some tears in her eyes, she feels sorry for Tom. “And… and then what? What did he say? Is he said he hated you or something?”

“No. He doesn’t say anything. The next morning, we woke up. Then he ran away. I haven't said a word to him yet.”

“Wha… So you mean, you haven't spoken to Marco, like at all, since that night? Even just texting?” Oh no, he better be NOT.

“Yes… because I’m…”

“And… and you said you ARE the one who done it, right?”

“Yeah… Yes?”

“…”

“…”

The silence is in the air. Again.

“OMG! OMG! OMG! I make friends with a dumbass demon. OMG! OMG! OMG!” Tania muttering. “Tom, do you realize the seriousness of this?” She turned to stare at the demon. Tom became extremely confused by his friend's fast-changing attitude.

“Uhm… Tania? I… I do realize. So I must talk to you about this, then find out how to solve this problem…”

“No, you DON’T. Because if you do, you wouldn't wait until 4 days, then come to my place to ask me how to solve this problem. Tom, I know you have suffered greatly from this love, you are also very confused, but try to stand under that boy's perspective. Suddenly his best friend done that thing with him, and then the subject went silent without any explanation or inquiry for 4 days. If it were you, do you suffer?” Tania stopped, she should not go too deep. Saying more will only make things confusing. Tom endured that was enough. She patted his shoulder, then went out to settle the bar, giving him space to think for himself.

Tom was left alone. He took a deep breath, trying to calm his mind to think. None of this would have happened if that damn instinct didn't inspire him. But Tom knows, he can't blame all on instinct. Marco Diaz, that name also made him sleepless all day and night. From the beginning because of jealousy with Marco when he was a close friend of Star, until he knows that for the first time, he had made a close friend besides Star. He treasured this friendship very much because not everyone could stand his normal temperament. Tom treasured it so much that he didn't want to break it. At one point, he almost lost this friendship. Luckily, Tom tried to calm down, so nothing happens. But now that he thinks about it, if at that time, he passed that point, maybe everything will be better.

Tom took another deep breath, took up his courage, and opened the compact. Before going to see Marco, he needed to talk to this person first.

___________Marco’s POV___________

Marco's whole body was exhausted after that night, his head was hot, stomach still felt yoke and burning hot don’t know why, but these injuries are nothing compared to Marco's feeling right now.

“Tom, what is he doing right now? Why doesn't he call me? Is it ... he hated me because I had proactively kissed him first?” Marco kept muttering like that. That morning, he was embarrassed so he runaways, but he still wanted to see Tom again. He had hoped Tom would come to see him, scold him, or take pity on him, whatever. But he didn’t come. Marco felt extremely uncomfortable, wanted to cry but couldn’t because doing so only made his parents more worried. He had been lying in bed for 4 days, taking the excuse that he had a cold, taking some medicine, and then resting was fine. The discomfort in his abdomen became increasingly uncomfortable. The lower was getting hotter and burning, and sometimes the pain was throbbing so he had to bend over to hug his stomach. This discomfort continues even in dreams.

In the dream, he was swimming in a black sea without a shore. Above the black border is a blood-red moon, as red as the Blood Moon night that Tom once determined to invite Star to attend. Blood moonlight shone on the surface of the dark, turn one spot in the black sea into dark red. Marco hurriedly swam there, feeling that if he could swim there, he would be safe. But every time, every time he swam near that red spot, there was a hand holding him back. He tried to pull away, but that hand clung too tightly. When that thing saw him still trying to swim to the blood moon, it got angry, decided to drag him down. Marco could not breathe, that thing still pulled him further and further away from the red light, down to the bottom of the black sea. He tried to turn to look, but could only see three bright lights gleaming on the black seafloor. Then, he woke up.

He wanted to sleep, but if he slept he would have to go through that dream again. But if he didn't sleep, his body would collapse. Marco closed his eyes again, really determined, certain this time, he would win that light, to swim to the red light.

___________The Present___________

Tom crouched in the Star's bedroom at Butterfly Castle. Star is pacing in front of him. Her face was completely distorted, hard to describe the feelings of Star right now. Several times she turned to look at Tom, frowned, then turned away, muttering to herself, pacing the room.

“No! No! No! Tom, why? Why is this thing happen??” Eventually, Star stopped pacing, turning to ask Tom. “It’s only 4 days, Tom. 4 DAYS. Then you just called me, saying, ‘Oh hey, Star! I accidentally have sex with Marco on the evening of your birthday party and I have run away for like 4 days. What should I do now?’ WHAT SHOULD YOU DO? What should I say, you tell me?”

"Star. I don't need you to do much for me. It's just ... you heard, I haven't seen Marco for almost a week. And to be honest, I'm more scared now. Listen, you're the best friend of ours. As it turned out like this, having a friend like you with me was better than I go alone to see Marco. And to be honest, I didn't dare to imagine Marco's angry form. Maybe he's cursed and never wish to see me ever again. ”

“He better be! You deserve it! ” Star angry said.

“Star, I know it. I should have died hundreds of times. However, Starship ... " Tom stood up, holding Star's hand earnestly," ... Please, just this once. The truth is, I have feelings for Marco too.”

“You… do?”

“I ... I ... Do you still remember the day I said I wanna break-up with you? The truth is ... I discovered that I liked Marco before that, liked… a lot. But I know that you and Marco had something at the time, I couldn't say it, or else I would not only hurt you two but also lose both my best friends. ”

“Oh… Tom…”

“So at that time, I made the best choice is to break up with you and encourage him to be with you. But Starship, I didn't expect him to choose not to come with you. He even decided to return to Earth, finish his studies, and live a normal life. For years, I tried not to say anything. I'm like a madman, trying to find a relationship like our old relationship, hoping that thanks to it, I could forget about Marco, about my love for him. But in the end, the new left faster than the previous one. And during those years, Marco was always single. I thought I had a chance. Just unexpectedly, things were happening so quickly... So fast, I didn't know how to handle them."

"Tom ..." Star softened, hugging his friend tightly. She was too heartless, didn’t realize Tom's feelings were so confused. Five years, neither long nor short, but enough to torment a person into crazy. She still knew that Tom's relationships were usually not last long, and she used to worry about him, but come to think about that… “Tom, about your feeling with Marco, is Janna know any about that? Is that the reason you two broke up?” Every time Star have a chat with her girls, and if she told about Tom’s relationship lately, Janna just laughs and telling that he deserved that, nothing to worried. At first, Star thought Janna was still angry with him because of the breakup thing, but after that, Janna still met Tom when the whole meeting and didn’t show any discomfort. That always confuses Star.

“I… I don’t know… Everything between me and Janna is fine, can say it’s perfect. The two of us enjoy doing weird things to her liking. To be honest, she’s the only one that made me think, maybe I can move on with, and someday, I can over Marco. I even prepared everything, told my parents, introduce her to those two. Everything was so smooth, but suddenly one day, she called me out to talk, then said nothing, just punched me in the eye… Then… after that… she said she wants to break-up… She doesn’t even answer my phone. If… if it’s true, that she knows about my feeling for Marco…” Tom held his head, not sure what to say. “Oh my god, I’m such a jerk!”

“Tom! We can talk about Janna later. I know she, if she can still show up at our group meetings without complaining, it means she wasn’t too angry with you. You still can find and apologize to her later. Now, MARCO!”

Encouraged by the Star, Tom felt that he was calm. He thanked Star, saying, “Thank you, Starship. You really are the best friend a demon king can ask for. Can this good friend follow me now to Marco's house to talk with him? ”

She smiled at him.

___________About 2 hours later___________

“ARGHHH! Can you just hurry up? How the hell does your dressing take two hours to complete?”

“Relax, Star! Bathing, choosing clothes, beautifying yourself need time. Not to mention I'm about to talk to Marco. I want to be beautiful in front of him.” As he said that, Tom remodeled his tie, though it looked perfect.

“Ohmygod! Don’t tell me, that EVERY TIME our group meeting, you always like this. No wonder you always look so… fancy like that. Turn out you want to flirt Marco ~~” Star pulled Tom while giggling teasing him.

“Star!!!!” Although it is true, but being so explicitly made Tom blush. His cheek turns to purple quickly.

Star still giggled, pulled Tom to Marco's door, and quickly rang the bell. She turned, instructed him. "Listen, maybe Rafael or Angie will open the door, just let me talk to them. While I was talking to them, you said you had something to tell Marco and…."

“Creak.”

The door opened, but behind it wasn't Rafael or Angie, but Marco. Neither Star nor Tom had expected it, since the one who opened the door was still one of the Diaz couples, they love to have someone visit them. Marco looked extremely tired, his red eyes looked like sleeplessness, even the puffiness became black. He was very pale and lethargic, but his hair was still neat, and in his arms, Marco was holding a cup of coffee, Star guessed that he had just washed his face and was drinking coffee to regain consciousness. Marco pulled back his bathrobe so he wouldn't get cold, intentionally not paying attention to Tom who was standing next to him, only smiling at Star: "Star! What are you doing here?"

“Oh, hi Marco! Uhmm… WE are here to talk. Can we… come in?” Star tried to smile brightly.

Marco glanced coldly at Tom. His brown eyes once full of affection are now as cold as ice. It hurts Tom's heart, he feels more guilty for ignoring him for 4 days.

“Sure, why not? Come on in, it’s cold out there.” Marco stepped aside, inviting the two to go inside. Both of them noticed Marco's cold attitude, but still went inside the house. The heat transfer between cold and hot made them shudder.

“Marco! Who is that?” It’s Rafael, resounded from the kitchen.

“It’s Star! She has something to tell you and mom!”

“Is she? Then tell her to sit down and wait a minute. We are in the middle of something!”

Both Tom and Star were amazed at Marco's attitude. Marco is a lousy liar, if not basically he can't lie. But just now, Marco lied extremely smoothly, even choosing an extremely natural reason without any loopholes. The two were not yet over surprised, Marco returned, coolly speaking. “Star, you're here waiting for my parents to come out and talk. And Tom, I need to talk to you.” Then he turned upstairs, seemingly unwilling to hear any more words

“Okay, we know for sure that Marco is extremely angry at you now. You go up there, trying to console him. Acting very sorry for the ‘incident”, trying to appease as much as possible. If he takes the bait, you go ahead. If he gets really angry, remember to call me, I'll go up there.”

Tom nodded, then gathered his courage, went upstairs. Tom has never felt so scared like now, as if he's now fighting thousands of monsters, not going up and talking to Marco. He tried to reassure himself, hypnotizing himself that he was just going to talk. Ah, wish it was just a simple talk. This conversation means a lot to him. It was not just his own show of affection for Marco over five years, but also its result. If Marco agrees, then he and Marco can finally be together. But if not, then he feared that even friendship would be gone. Who would accept that his best friend has feelings for him, and then willfully did such a thing like that to him?

Tom took a deep breath, then turned the door handle. He saw Marco standing with his back to him, his face turning to the window. He felt Marco was skinny and gloomy than before. He sighed, closed the door, and said his line: "Marco..." But before he could say anything, Marco quickly turned around and walked in front of Tom. And then, he leaned up, wrapped his arms around the back of Tom's head, and kissed him.

Tom was very surprised. He could not guess this was coming. Marco is proactively kissing him. His full lips are plastered on Tom's lips, soft, cool, and extremely real. Tom was overwhelmed, but he quickly regained consciousness, his hands quickly hugging Marco’s waist, picking him up to press the kiss deeper. Tom could smell the scent of his shampoo and shower gel, and felt the bitter coffee he just drank as they both kissed. It all made Tom infatuated. He leaned against the wall completely, one hand lifted Marco's butt, one hand pulled his leg around Tom’s waist, then kissed him passionately.

“Tom, do you love me?” Marco stopped the kiss, but his forehead rested on Tom's, their lips only a few centimeters apart. Tom looked into his eyes. It was not as cold as it used to be, it was glittering with emotion, reflecting Tom's image in it. Tom felt revived, the whole body energized. He hurriedly kissed small kiss on Marco’s face and lips, answering: "Yes, Marco. I love you. Love you very much. Love you till the day I die."

“Is that so? So if I want anything, you can give it, right?”

“Yes, anything, even my heart.” Tom hurriedly answered. Marco giggled, rubbing his ear. "You goofy, I don't need your heart." He gently kisses back, “I just need you to love me, with all your souls!”

“Yes, I will.” Tom leaned over, kissing Marco once more time.

___________Down stair___________

Star sat opposite the Diaz couple, holding the teacup they were invited to and extremely confused. If Marco was said to be a lousy liar, then Star lied worse, the truth proved that. Star tried to smile, asking some silly questions to the couple. She was hoping Tom would comfort Marco soon to get herself out of this situation, or she was afraid she might flush it out. But before she could tell the truth as she feared, Rafael changed the subject. He looked confused and worried when asked Star. “Star, on your birthday night, did something happen to Marco?”

“Wh… What~~? No… No! Nothing happens! Everyone is fine. No one gets trouble or something… hahahaa…Ha!” Star negated in a soaring high voice. “Oh shit! Oh shit! Help! Tom, hurry up!!!” She tried to keep calm but her forehead was still sweating, even a sip of tea she just drinks couldn’t make her throat less dry.

“Is that so?” Rafael sighed. He looked hesitant, even giving Angie a look when he saw her nod, he turned to Star and continued. “Star, we really don't want to say this, for fear you will be worried. But before we start, we just want to say that everything is okay, everything is under control. No need to be overly worried.”

“Yes?” Star realized the strangeness of the two.

“It’s about Marco. He has severe depression.”

“Severe… depression?”

“Simply put, it is a disease caused by long-term stress. It causes patients to have trouble sleeping, tired, irritable, and especially thinking about committing suicide.” Rafael explained. “At first, the two of us just thought that Marco was not used to normal life, maybe it would be fine later. But he is getting more and more strange. He often has insomnia, cries often, and the teacher at school often complains about his distracted attitude. And then one morning, Angie found him holding a razor blade in front of the mirror, right at his neck as if about to cut down. Although Angie had stopped Marco at that moment, and he didn't seem to recognize or remember that suicide, but we were forced to take him to a psychiatrist.”

"The doctor concluded he had severe depression." Angie burst into tears, trying to hold back her tears but unable to. “At that time, we did not know what to do. Oh, our mijo! Marco promised us he would try to get through, telling us not to tell this to anyone else. But how can it be overcome so easily? He had been miserable for a long time, only when he went to meet his friends, he seems to have returned to normal. It took more than two years for Marco to no longer have the thought of committing suicide. But the depression is still there. We were so afraid that one day, he couldn’t think and then commit suicide like that morning.”

“Two years? That… the time when Tom and Janna...?”

“For that reason, we forced him to stay with us, even though he went to college now. Maybe with his friends, he said that he wanted to save up for student’s loan, but actually it was because of his depression that we couldn't stop watching him.”

“Lately he's been better than before. We were extremely excited, thinking that he might have returned to being old Marco. But, four days ago, after your birthday party, it became strange again. Even though he told me he only had a cold, he tried not to cry and sleep well, but why didn't we realize that.”

“That why, we want to ask you, do you know what happened that night?”

Being looked at by both Diaz and the couple, Star felt like a criminal being questioned. She couldn't keep her word, sorry Tom, but she had to say it.“Uhm… Actually… That night…”

“STAR!” Glossaryck from nowhere naturally appeared right next to Star, screaming her name.

“AHHHHHHHH! Cheese and crackers! Glossaryck?! What are you doing here?” Star feels confusing. A few days ago, Glossaryck suddenly said he has something important to deal with, then disappeared from that moment. But now, he suddenly appeared here.

“No time to talk! Where is Tom? We need to save him. NOW!”

“Tom? What are you talking about? He is fine. He with Marco now. The two of them were talking about their problems…” Star quickly turned to the Diaz “… at the previous four days. But it’s like 10 minutes has passed, and there was no sound of fight or argument, so I think we're okay, it's all right. You two can be chill. Marco will soon…”

“No, Star! Marco IS the problem.” Glossaryck protested.

“What are you…”

BOOMM!!!

A loud bang, coming from upstairs. The four of them stopped talking and quickly ran upstairs. Star went upstairs first, and quickly ran to Marco's room, she realized that loud noise came from the direction of his room. But when she got to the door, she felt something amiss. The door of Marco's room was still closed, but there were cold, chilling breezes coming through the door, along with a frightening green light. Star recognized that light.

“Star, you better be prepare beforehand.” Glossaryck flew close, reminding Star. Star took a deep breath, then turned the door handle.

Behind the door was a scene, that perhaps until the end of her life, Star can not forget. Tom was lying near the door, unmoving, his pale lilac skin even paler, almost becoming white, as if he were dead. The room was disturbed by a hurricane, everything was lifted by the wind, scattered in the air. The roof has a very big hole, snow poured everywhere. Looking up, Star sees something even more terrifying. It was Marco, float in midair. But that was not normal Marco, it was a monster with Marco's face. His eyes are completely black, from the pupil to the sclera. Marco grew a small horn on the right, which resembled Tom's. There was a crescent moon shaped magic mark on his cheek, but it was not like what she had ever seen. Marco's magic mark is shown in bright red, but now it shows in the formidable green of dark magic.

“Mar…Marco?!” She couldn't believe it was her friend.

“Oh, princess Butterfly! We meet again.” "Marco" smirked, responding softly.

“Be careful, Star. He was no longer Marco.” Glossaryck appears, alerting Star. He also quickly closed the door to prevent Rafael and his wife. Can't let them see this situation. “So I guess you were the cause of the disturbance in the Realm of Magic, right?”

“The Realm of Magic has its own consciousness, Glossaryck. You can't blame us because it's been unstable lately. It simply... is welcoming a new member of it. A Prince! Prince of Darkness!”

“Marco” laughed maniacally. And, he began to change again. Two pairs of huge wings sprouted from his back. It has color of purple and green, with skull and hypnotic patterns on it. He also grows 4 more arms. He looked exactly like one of the Butterfly members when they transformed. “Marco” tried flapping the butterfly's wings and pleased to see it flap naturally.

“You… Who are you? Why did you take Marco? Give him back to me!”

“Ouch! It’s hurt, princess. After all, you did KILL us! Remember?”

As if something awakened, Star was scared, unable to believe in the truth. “You… you… Toffee?!” It can’t be! It can’t be! Toffee is dead!

“Close enough! Actually, it takes more than just one spirit to get this form, you know. But luckily, thank to you, this boy had absorbed enough evil spirits. But still, it takes a little more energy to convert. And then, you brought that guy to me, just in time.” He pointed to Tom, who was lying motionless on the ground, laughing. “Oh, men! I have nothing to say. You are just like my guardian angel. Tricking him is really too easy, it was like taking candy from a child's hands. All that because he loves 'me'! Hahahahahaha….!”

Star felt unprecedented despair and regret. If that's what he said, was that her fault, so Marco turned into that? And also because of that, so Tom got involved? Did she harm her loved ones?

“No! Give him back to me!” Star screamed, transformed, and took the magic wand, rushing towards “Marco”. But before she could get close, she was repelled by a wave of dark magic, shot back.

“Oh, Princess Butterfly. Although we would love to stay here to have a little chat with you, but unfortunately, we have to go. See you soon!” Marco smiled tenderly, then created a portal. Star has never seen such a gate. It was similar to the gate she went to the Realm of Magic, but instead of the inherent color, it was black and green. “Oh, one more thing. Send Tom a kiss for me. He really loves me with ALL his souls. Well, half of it is enough. Hahahahaha… Bye~~!” Marco chuckled, then disappeared behind the portal.

As soon as Marco disappeared, the whirlwind in the air gradually dissipated, the furniture gradually lowered, scattered everywhere. Star sat motionless on the ground, unable to believe what he had just heard or seen. She just sat there, staring into the air, enduring every wave of snow and wind blowing in her face. Outside, Rafael and Angie, despite being prevented by Glossaryck's magic to prevent them from entering or hearing anything, but they were too nervous, standing outside and try to knock the door.

Glossaryck sighed. He removed the magic from the door, letting them enter. Upon entering the room, both of them were rendered speechless by the scenery. But before they can be saying anything, Glossaryck took the initiative to say it first. “Star, we need to go now. Bring Tom and the Diaz family back to Mewni. I'm afraid this is not gonna end well.”

_______________

From this chapter I will post on tumbler too. Because the previous 2 chapters are too ... hahaha...

[lovemesomesurveys]

Have you ever hugged someone for over a minute? Hm. I don’t think I have for that long, but maybe. 

Would you ever get a tattoo on your collar bone? Nooo.

Would you take the 3 minute beatdown to be in a gang? Um, no... Do you check your texts right away when you receive them? Not always.

Has the last person you texted ever been mad at you before? Yes.

Have you ever searched for your house on Google Earth? Ha, yeah. I remember when that was the new thing the first thing a lot of people did was search their own house. Out of everything we could look at lol.

How old do you look? Early 20s.

Do you like movie nights? Yeah.

Is there a trampoline in your backyard? Nope.

Does the thought of having children scare you? I’m not having children.

Are you nice to everyone? I think so.

Would you rather date someone older than you or younger? Older. Not by a lot, though.

Are you excited for anything happening in the next week? No.

What will you be doing in the next 2 hours? I should try and attempt sleep.

Who did you talk to on the phone last? My mom.

Does it make you uncomfortable when you receive a compliment? It’s just awkward cause I’m awkward. 

When you are home alone at night and hear strange noises, are you afraid someone is going to break in? Thankfully, I’m never home alone at night.

Do you wake up cranky? Sometimes. I’m typically just a zombie, though, until I’ve had coffee.

What is on your wrists right now? Nothing.

Are you a beach, country, or city person? Well, I live in the city but I love the beach.

Are you an official couple with the last person you kissed? Nope. Never was.

Looking back, did you ever think you would be where you are now? No.

Do you like someone? I’m not interested in anyone in the romantic sense, currently.

Are you happier now or three months ago? Wasn’t happy then or now.

What’s the greatest thing that happened to you today? Nothing has really happened so far, it’s only 5:45AM.

How old do you think you will be when you finally have kids? Sigh.

Are you waiting for something? For the weather to finally feel like fall.

If you could change your eye color would you? Yeah. I wish I had blue or green eyes.

What was the weather like today? It’s supposed to be 93F today aka too hot. Sighhhh.

Do you think you’ll be married in ten years? Nope.

Does your ex still love/like you? Nope.

Are you stubborn? Ohh yes.

Do you tend to hold a grudge? No.

Where were you at 9am this morning? It hasn’t been 9AM, yet, but I know I’ll be right here in bed.

How has the week been? It’s just starting.

Did you go out or stay in last night? Stayed in of course. I don’t go out anymore, even pre-covid. It’s been a few years.

Something you do a lot? Worry.

How many states have you lived in? Just one.

Can you commit to one person? Yes.

Who was the last person to hold your hand? My doggo, ha.

How many chances do you tend to give people before enough is enough? I give out many chances. Do you think you and your best friend will be friends in 10 years? My mom has and always will be my best friend.

What do you miss most about your ex? He made me laugh like no other. He was just a fun guy to be around. That was also part of the issue, though. We could never have a serious conversation because he turned everything into a joke.

Are you attracted to the last person that kissed you? Not anymore.

What’s a fact about the last person you kissed? He’s into writing, photography, and drawing.

Something you really want right now? My back to stop hurting.

How long have you liked the person you like? I don’t like anyone in that way.

Does any part of your body hurt right now? Yes.

Did anyone see you kiss the last person you kissed? Probably.

Can you recall the last time you liked someone? Yeah, back in 2016.

Are you happy with the way things are going? No.

Do you think you will be in a relationship 3 months from now? Nope.

What plans do you have for tomorrow? Same stuff, different day.

Has a friendship ended recently that you wish hadn’t? Not recently, it’s been a few years now. 

Have you ever given your ALL to someone who walked away? Yes.

Have you ever kissed the last person you texted? No.

Do you and your last ex hate each other? No.

When was the last time you were sick? I feel crappy in some way or another all the time, but as far as like a cold or something not since earlier this year.

Are you one of those people who are always cold? No, I’m always hot.

Do you tend to waste a lot of money? I can get carried away sometimes with stuff I don’t need, but this year I think I’ve been pretty good for the most part.

Have you ever regretted kissing someone? No.

When was the last time you got a haircut? Back in February.

Did you sing at all today? Not as of yet.

Would you rather be able to control the weather or control traffic? The weather, most definitely.

Do you own any articles of clothing with skulls on it? Yeah.

Are you faster at text messaging or typing on the computer? Typing on the computer.

If you won a trip to a nude beach would you go or give the trip away? Aw, it can’t be a regular beach? lol. I don’t care to see a bunch of people in the nude and I certainly wouldn’t be nude.

In your opinion which is the stronger emotion: love or hate? Both are very strong, intense emotions.

Tongue piercings - cute or trashy? Not my thing.

When it comes to jeans: skinny, flared or boot cut? Only skinny jeans.

Would you rather be a star ballerina or a star break dancer? Neither would be possible for me.

When it comes to Baseball would you rather be on the field or in the stands? Neither.

I’ve got to know, who do you prefer: Mario or Luigi? Luigi.

Have you ever changed clothes in a public area (not a dressing room)? Nooo.

How many months apart is your birthday from your best friends? Two months.

Yes or no: Techno music? No.

Yes or no: pigtails? Not for me.

They say diamonds are a girls best friend; what do you say? I mean, they’re beautiful but I’m not super into jewelry.

Has anybody ever told somebody one of your secrets? Yes.

Have you ever kissed anybody who had a mustache? No.

If you were famous do you think you could handle the popularity? Noooo. I never would want to be famous.

Have you ever kissed someone whose name started with a letter P? Nope.

Did you talk to one of your best friends today? What did you talk about? Not yet, but later on.

Do you get on better with funny or serious people? I like people who know when to be funny and when to be serious. <<<

Do you have mood swings around the time of the month? Yeah, I always did. I don’t have “the time of the month” anymore, but I’m moody all the time.

Have your friends met the last person you kissed? The friends I had at the time did, yeah.

What if you saw your best friend holding hands with your ex? My mom would never.

Your last relationship, who dumped who? He ended it.

How old were you when you had your first boyfriend/girlfriend? 16.

Is your hometown nice? No.

What if you got stuck in a lift with the last person who Facebook messaged you? I’d be freaking out cause claustrophobia, but at least I’d be with my aunt, who I’ve always been really close to.

When/where did your last hug take place? Here at home.

Do you consider yourself mature enough to make your own decisions? At 31 I should be, but I certainly have made a lot of bad ones...

Have your parents ever told you about their love lives, and any previous relationships they had before they met? My mom has told me about a high school boyfriend.

You get a text from someone saying that they want to hang out - who would you most like it to be from? I don’t have any friends, so. 

Do you and your friends have any inside jokes? My family and I do.

Do you think someone has feelings for you? Are these feelings returned? At this time, no one likes me romantically and I don’t like anyone romantically.

What if the last person you texted were to ask you out? Uh, no they would never. The only people I text with are my parents and brother...

Do you believe in love at first sight? Explain. Nope. I just don’t see how you can love and have such strong, intense feelings for someone you haven’t met or just met. You don’t know them. You don’t know if you even vibe or connect. They may have the shittiest personality. You gotta get to know a person first and see if you have a connection.

Would you prefer to be somewhere else right now? If so, where? And why would you prefer to be there? No, I’m perfectly fine with being in bed right now.

When you listen to music, do you ever find that the songs affect your moods and change how you feel? Sometimes.

Can you remember what you dreamt about last night? No, but I know it was something super weird and random cause they always are.

What’s one thing about today that you didn’t like? It’s only 6 in the morning, too soon to say.

Who is the last person that you said i love you to, besides family members? There hasn’t been anyone other than my family.

Are you mad at anyone right now? No.

Is there one thing all of your ex’s had in common? Sense of humor.

What’s a compliment you receive often? I don’t receive compliments often.

Have you ever had a friend that got a bf/gf, and then completely ignored you? No.

Would you ever go back to any of your past relationships? No.

Who was the last person to comfort you when you were upset or crying? My mom. Do you prefer to text or talk on the phone? Texting over talking on the phone for sure, but I don’t text much either.

Do you know anyone that’s gotten an abortion before? Yes.

Do you think you could forgive someone for cheating on you? I don’t know.

Have you ever been arrested? No.

Who’s the last person that gave you roses? I haven’t received roses, but I’ve received flowers of a different variety by family for graduations, hospital stays, and birthdays.

Do you still talk to the first person you kissed? Nope. It’s been like 10 years. What if you had a baby with the last person you kissed? Nope.

Do you have a picture of you kissing someone? Yeah.

Who was the last person to comment one of your pictures? My aunt.

What’s a cuss word you use often? “Damn”, “shit”, “hell.” If I drop an F bomb then I’m really upset and in a bad mood.

Have you learned from your past mistakes? I keep making them.

Who’s the last guy you texted? My brother.

What about the last girl? My mom.

Who was the last person to make you cry? It was just out of frustration with stuff I’m dealing with.

Have you ever not been able to get someone out of your head? Yeah, for a long time. I wouldn’t think about my ex nearly as much, if at all, anymore if surveys didn’t keep bringing him up. I mean, I would randomly now and then, but surveys won’t let me go a day. Although, the thoughts don’t tend to last too long after the survey is over, so. They’re gone until the next batch f surveys, ha.

What is one quality that you really appreciate in a person? I admire people who are passionate about something. I love how animated people get when talking about something they love; their whole face lights up.  I also really envy that quality.

When was your first real relationship? Technically, I’ve only had boyfriend and that was when I was 16. It had the title anyway, but it wasn’t what I’d consider to be a real relationship. It didn’t last long, like seriously it was 2 months, so it never got very serious at all. My heart wasn’t really in it either, I wasn’t ready. Then there’s the whole Joseph situation, which lasted 3 years and in a lot of ways is the closest thing I have to a relationship, even though it never was one. The feelings and intensity were definitely there for me. But honestly, I have yet to actually experience a real relationship. 

Have you ever cried over an ex? Yeah, too many times.

Do you ever think about your ex and cry? Not anymore.

Is there anyone in your life who you won’t ever want to lose? I don’t want to lose any of my loved ones. Have you ever snuck out of your house? No, I was a good kid. <<< Ha, same. But also, I wouldn’t have had to anyway. I could have hung out, I just didn’t. I was such a homebody then, too. My social life came when I was 19 and into my early and mid 20s. Then I became a total hermit crab.

Have you ever snuck someone into your house? No.

Have you ever kissed someone of the same sex? No.

How many people have you kissed? Three.

What’s the craziest thing you’ve done on a dare? I’m usually too much of a chicken shit to choose “dare”. Haha. <<< Hahaha. We’re so much alike.

Have you ever cussed someone out? Not to their face.

Have you ever cheated on someone? No. I was loyal even to Joseph, who I was never officially with, so I definitely would be to someone I was actually in a relationship with.

Have you ever had a friend-with-benefits? Yes. Have you ever spread a nasty rumor about someone? Nooo.

Have you ever broken someone’s heart? Yes. :/

Have you ever been physically abused? No.

What’s something you really regret saying to someone? There’s many things I wish I could take back.

Is there something really bad that you’ve done, that only YOU know about? I’m pretty boring, so I don’t think so..

Does it take a lot to make you feel guilty? No.

Have you ever broken a really important promise? Yes. 

Have you ever gone out with a best friend’s ex? No.

Have you ever made out with someone who was just a friend? Yes.

Have you ever cheated on a test? No.

Have you ever told someone’s deep, dark secret? No.

Do you ever lie to make yourself sound better? Ha, based on my survey answers I clearly don’t. I’m open with ya’ll, and it’s not pretty.

Have you ever made up a false rumor to get back at someone? No.

Have you ever gotten in a fist fight? Nope.

Have you ever purposely hurt yourself? Yes.

Have you ever mooned/flashed someone? Nooo.

Have you ever caused someone major embarrassment? I feel like I’m just embarrassing.

Have you ever pushed someone into a pool? No.

Have you ever got in a fight with someone and never made up? Yes.

Have you ever farted and blamed it on someone else? Um, excuse me I don’t fart.

Have you ever copied someone else’s homework? No. I was the person people tried coming to so they could copy mine. I hated that.

Have you ever skipped school to do something more fun? I have for family vacations.

Have you ever skipped school to get out of a test? No. I wouldn’t have gotten out of it, I would have gotten a zero.

Have you ever kissed someone the same day you met them? No.

What’s under your bed? Nothing.

What’s on that way top shelf or in the very far back of your closet? Medical supplies.

Do you have a super-secret hiding place and what’s in it? Now why would I share that if I did?

Have you done something recently you hope no one finds out about? No.

What is your last thought before you fall asleep? My mind goes to some random places.

Have you ever you shop lifted? No.

[hamonsurveysoverdrive]

Abomination

Have you ever hugged someone for over a minute? I mean, maybe?

Would you ever get a tattoo on your collar bone? I don’t know.

Would you take the 3 minute beatdown to be in a gang? No thankssss. Do you check your texts right away when you receive them? Absolutely not.

Has the last person you texted ever been mad at you before? Justin has been mad at me multiple times lol.

Have you ever searched for your house on Google Earth? Yes.

How old do you look? Early to mid-20s.

Do you like movie nights? Always.

Is there a trampoline in your backyard? I don’t even have a backyard.

Does the thought of having children scare you? I already have two, so yes, the thought of having more sounds like a nightmare.

Are you nice to everyone? No.

Would you rather date someone older than you or younger? Justin is younger than me.

What will you be doing in the next 2 hours?

Probably driving home.

Who did you talk to on the phone last? Actual talking? I think the kids’ dad.

Does it make you uncomfortable when you receive a compliment? Sometimes.

When you are home alone at night and hear strange noises, are you afraid someone is going to break in? Yes.

Do you wake up cranky? Sometimes.

What is on your wrists right now? A bracelet that says “Redrum” on it.

Are you a beach, country, or city person? City.

Are you an official couple with the last person you kissed? Yes.

Looking back, did you ever think you would be where you are now? No.

Do you like someone? My boyfriend.

Are you happier now or three months ago? Now.

What’s the greatest thing that happened to you today? Nothing great has really happened.

How old do you think you will be when you finally have kids? I was 19 when I had my first kid, 22 with my second.

Are you waiting for something? Sure.

If you could change your eye color would you? Maybe to grey.

What was the weather like today? It sunny and nice.

Do you think you’ll be married in ten years? I hope not.

Does your ex still love/like you? Probably.

Are you stubborn? Oh yeah.

Do you tend to hold a grudge? Yes.

Where were you at 9am this morning? In bed.

How has the week been? It went by so fast!

Did you go out or stay in last night? I went to Justin’s house, so I’m not sure if that’s considered going out or staying in lol.

Something you do a lot? Worry.

How many states have you lived in? One.

Can you commit to one person? Yes.

Who was the last person to hold your hand? Justin, or one of my kids.

How many chances do you tend to give people before enough is enough? Way too many. Do you think you and your best friend will be friends in 10 years? Yes.

What do you miss most about your ex? Nothing.

Are you attracted to the last person that kissed you? Yes.

What’s a fact about the last person you kissed? He’s an only child.

Something you really want right now? A million dollars.

How long have you liked the person you like? For about 3-4 years.

Does any part of your body hurt right now? My shoulders and neck, a little.

Did anyone see you kiss the last person you kissed? I assume not, since it was just me and him in his garage.

Can you recall the last time you liked someone? Now.

Are you happy with the way things are going? Yes.

Do you think you will be in a relationship 3 months from now? Yes.

What plans do you have for tomorrow? Nothing in particular, I think.

Has a friendship ended recently that you wish hadn’t? Nope.

Have you ever given your ALL to someone who walked away? Yes.

Have you ever kissed the last person you texted? Yes.

Do you and your last ex hate each other? Nah.

When was the last time you were sick? Like a year ago.

Are you one of those people who are always cold? Not really.

Do you tend to waste a lot of money? Yes.

Have you ever regretted kissing someone? No.

When was the last time you got a haircut? In July.

Did you sing at all today? Yeah.

Would you rather be able to control the weather or control traffic? Weather.

Do you own any articles of clothing with skulls on it? Yes.

Are you faster at text messaging or typing on the computer? Typing.

If you won a trip to a nude beach would you go or give the trip away? I probably wouldn’t go.

In your opinion which is the stronger emotion: love or hate? Love.

Tongue piercings - cute or trashy? Neither?

When it comes to jeans: skinny, flared or boot cut? Skinny.

Would you rather be a star ballerina or a star break dancer? No thanks.

When it comes to Baseball would you rather be on the field or in the stands? The stands.

I’ve got to know, who do you prefer: Mario or Luigi? Mario.

Have you ever changed clothes in a public area (not a dressing room)? Yes.

How many months apart is your birthday from your best friends? Kelsi’s birthday is six days before mine, Krystle’s is 6 months before, Needles is 5 months before, Carly’s is 10 months before.

Yes or no: Techno music? Nah.

Yes or no: pigtails? Nah.

They say diamonds are a girls best friend; what do you say? I think that’s stupid.

Has anybody ever told somebody one of your secrets? Yes.

Have you ever kissed anybody who had a mustache? Yepp.

If you were famous do you think you could handle the popularity? Probably not.

Have you ever kissed someone whose name started with a letter P? My high school boyfriend’s name was Phillip.

Did you talk to one of your best friends today? What did you talk about? I talked to Justin, Krystle, and Carly.

Do you get on better with funny or serious people? Funny.

Do you have mood swings around the time of the month? Yes.

Have your friends met the last person you kissed? Yes. Most of my friends are his friends too.

What if you saw your best friend holding hands with your ex? I’d be very, very confused.

Your last relationship, who dumped who? I ended it.

How old were you when you had your first boyfriend/girlfriend? 13.

Is your hometown nice? Some parts.

What if you got stuck in a lift with the last person who Facebook messaged you? Ugh, I’d rather not.

When/where did your last hug take place? Earlier today, at my mom’s house.

Do you consider yourself mature enough to make your own decisions? I’m 31...

Have your parents ever told you about their love lives, and any previous relationships they had before they met? Yes.

You get a text from someone saying that they want to hang out - who would you most like it to be from? Justin.

Do you and your friends have any inside jokes? Sure.

Do you think someone has feelings for you? Are these feelings returned? I know my boyfriend does, and obviously they’re returned.

What if the last person you texted were to ask you out? Well, he’s already my boyfriend, so.

Do you believe in love at first sight? Explain. No, that’s dumb.

Would you prefer to be somewhere else right now? If so, where? And why would you prefer to be there? Yes, like, in a room surrounded by millions of dollars, where it’s free for the taking?

When you listen to music, do you ever find that the songs affect your moods and change how you feel? Sure.

Can you remember what you dreamt about last night? No.

What’s one thing about today that you didn’t like? Feeling nauseated.

Who is the last person that you said i love you to, besides family members? Probably Justin.

Are you mad at anyone right now? Nope.

Is there one thing all of your ex’s had in common? Sarcastic assholes who can carry a good conversation. And they all have daddy issues.

What’s a compliment you receive often? My eyes, my lips, or my hair.

Have you ever had a friend that got a bf/gf, and then completely ignored you? Yepp.

Would you ever go back to any of your past relationships? No.

Who was the last person to comfort you when you were upset or crying? Probably Justin. Do you prefer to text or talk on the phone? Text.

Do you know anyone that’s gotten an abortion before? Yes.

Do you think you could forgive someone for cheating on you? Not anymore.

Have you ever been arrested? Yes.

Who’s the last person that gave you roses? Justin.

Do you still talk to the first person you kissed? No. What if you had a baby with the last person you kissed? NO THANKS.

Do you have a picture of you kissing someone? Yes.

Who was the last person to comment one of your pictures? Rey

Have you learned from your past mistakes?

Am I supposed to list everything I’ve ever learned for every mistake I’ve ever made, or...?

Who’s the last guy you texted? Justin... jesus this whole survey is becoming about him.

What about the last girl? Krystle & Kelsi in a group text.

Who was the last person to make you cry? Myself.

Have you ever not been able to get someone out of your head? Sure.

What is one quality that you really appreciate in a person? Honesty.

When was your first real relationship? Well, I don’t really count high school relationships as real relationships, so I guess when I was 20.

Have you ever cried over an ex? Yes.

Do you ever think about your ex and cry? Not anymore.

Is there anyone in your life who you won’t ever want to lose? Of course?? Have you ever snuck out of your house? Not really, no.

Have you ever snuck someone into your house? Nope.

Have you ever kissed someone of the same sex? Yes.

How many people have you kissed? Way too many to try and count.

What’s the craziest thing you’ve done on a dare? Idk

Have you ever cussed someone out? Yes.

Have you ever cheated on someone? Yes.

Have you ever had a friend-with-benefits? Yes. Have you ever spread a nasty rumor about someone? Not intentionally.

Have you ever broken someone’s heart? Supposedly.

Have you ever been physically abused? Yes.

What’s something you really regret saying to someone? Nothing.

Is there something really bad that you’ve done, that only YOU know about? I don’t think so.

Does it take a lot to make you feel guilty? No.

Have you ever broken a really important promise? Probably.

Have you ever gone out with a best friend’s ex? Yes.

Have you ever made out with someone who was just a friend? Yes.

Have you ever cheated on a test? No, but I’ve helped others cheat.

Have you ever told someone’s deep, dark secret? No.

Do you ever lie to make yourself sound better? Not really.

Have you ever made up a false rumor to get back at someone? No.

Have you ever gotten in a fist fight? No.

Have you ever purposely hurt yourself? Yes.

Have you ever mooned/flashed someone? Yes. Got sent to an alternative school because of it lol

Have you ever caused someone major embarrassment? Not major, no.

Have you ever pushed someone into a pool? Yes.

Have you ever got in a fight with someone and never made up? Yes.

Have you ever farted and blamed it on someone else? Yes lol

Have you ever copied someone else’s homework? Yes.

Have you ever skipped school to do something more fun? Yes.

Have you ever skipped school to get out of a test? No.

Have you ever kissed someone the same day you met them? Yes.

What’s under your bed? The banisters that are supposed to go on my bed, the ceiling fan is in the way.

What’s on that way top shelf or in the very far back of your closet? Games.

Do you have a super-secret hiding place and what’s in it? No.

Have you done something recently you hope no one finds out about? Nope.

What is your last thought before you fall asleep? It varies.

Have you ever you shop lifted? Yes, in my angsty youth.

[nostalgiaispeace]

1824.

Stage one: Emotions. How often do you take actions you regret? all the time

Do you often feel guilty? all the damn time. Do you have a short temper? depends

When was the last time you lashed out at someone? idk And why was that? -

Does it always seem like the entire world is out to get you? yeah Have you ever had a serious mental break down? yes What led up to this? (sadness, depression, fury, confusion, etc) none of your business Do you believe it is just natural for humans to feel lonely? no Do you ever feel lonely, even in the presence of those you know or love? sometimes Do you believe that these are the “best years of your life”? no Or do you follow the “the best is yet to come” philosophy? no Does it sometimes feel like your life is being wasted or not going anywhere? sometimes Tell me about the last time you were truly, truly happy. idk Stage two: Relationships. How long was your longest relationship? 7 years How old were you when you had your first boyfriend or girlfriend? 18 Do you (or have you ever) had feelings for the SAME sex? no Do you consider yourself gay or bisexual? How strongly do you feel about it? no. Have you ever had your heart broken? yeah Did you ever honestly believe you were going to marry your high school bf/gf? - Is it harder to get dumped or do the dumping? i’ve only been dumped so idk Have you been able to stay good friends with any of your exes? yeah If so, is there any tension (sexual or not) between the two of you? no Would you ever date someone that your friend liked or HAD dated? no When was the last time you were kissed? today Are you a virgin? Do you believe virginity is “sacred”? no, yes How many times have you been in love? Was it always real? once and yes. Stage three: Friendships. Would you say that you have a lot of friends? no Have you ever been considered to be a “loner”? yes How often do you hang out with your friends? never Do you have a specific hang out or house that you go to? - Have you ever done anything illegal to help a friend? no If not, would you be willing to? What would be your limit? probably not Who is your best friend? VERY best. Choose. Sami and Britt Have any of your friends ever stabbed you in the back? yeah Did you forgive them? Are you still friends? yeah and yes Are your friends the only people that “get you”? sometimes Do you think your friends know you better than your own parents? probably Have you ever lost a close friend because they died? no Have you ever lost a friend because they gained a bf/gf and dropped you? no Are your friends your support system? =] Yes. Stage four: Family Life Are both your parents alive? They are. Were you raised by your biological parents? by my mom Has your family ever been broken? yes Do you think your parents respect your space? they have to Are you close with you siblings, if you have any? yes How often does your family fight or have big arguments? i don’t find with them anymore Does your family hold very high religious beliefs? no Are you the “black sheep” of your household? basically Have you ever in anger told your parent(s) that you hated them? yes How often are you diciplined or punished or grounded? a lot Do you feel like you are allowed to express yourself inside your own home? yes Are your parents very controlling of the person “they want you to be”? not controlling in that way Your family really does love each other, doesn’t it? i suppose Are you planning to move away when you turn 18? i moved when i was 24

[purplesurveys]

787

Stage one: Emotions. How often do you take actions you regret? Not super often, but it’ll come up once in a while.

Do you often feel guilty? As someone who was raised in a verbally abusive household and was always blamed, corrected, or shamed for not knowing any better, you bet your ass I feel guilty all the time. ‘Sorry’ is probably in my top 50 most used words haha. Do you have a short temper? A little bit, yeah. I got my mom’s impatience for most situations and I’m also a bit of a perfectionist, so if I’m in work mode and I see that something’s askew I’ll be fussy about it until it’s fixed.

When was the last time you lashed out at someone? This afternoon when I was feeling super stressed and was venting to Gabie, but I had the vibe that she wasn’t all ears. And why was that? Because I would assume anyone would feel shitty when they’re ranting to someone they trust and that person acts like they aren’t listening?

Does it always seem like the entire world is out to get you? I have weeks like this, but it’s not constant. Overall, I think the world is mostly decent with me. Have you ever had a serious mental break down? Yeup, tons. What led up to this? (sadness, depression, fury, confusion, etc) I’m not getting into them lmao? Do you believe it is just natural for humans to feel lonely? Of course. Everyone goes through their own battles that makes them feel this way, and sometimes the physical presence of other people or having a packed schedule wouldn’t be enough either. Do you ever feel lonely, even in the presence of those you know or love? Yeah, that’s what I was just trying to say in the last question. There’ve been a few times I wasn’t feeling my best, and I thought going to Skywalk was going to fix stuff but it didn’t. Do you believe that these are the "best years of your life"? High school and college were, but I'm expecting to stumble a bit in the next few years as I try to navigate adulthood and make the best of my 20s. I think it’s normal though as I know most people feel the same when they’re in their mid-20s, so I’ve come to terms with the fact that it might not be the best years for a while. Or do you follow the "the best is yet to come" philosophy? Yeah, but I also don’t just depend on the future to be great. I’m able to realize when there’s good things happening in the present too. Does it sometimes feel like your life is being wasted or not going anywhere? Occasionally. Nothing good comes out of those thoughts though, so I never entertain them. Tell me about the last time you were truly, truly happy. Sometime in January. I drove my girlfriend to her place and there was no one home, so we used that time to catch up and talk and watch Titanic haha. Being it was the beginning of the sem, I still didn’t have any class requirements or org deliverables so it was really just an evening to spend time with her. I love moments like those the most because it’s when I’m reminded how much I love having her around. Stage two: Relationships. How long was your longest relationship? My current one, which is running at four years. Though we’ve been linked together for much longer than that, so whenever I wanna impress people a little bit more I also sometimes say six years hahahaha How old were you when you had your first boyfriend or girlfriend? I was 16. Do you (or have you ever) had feelings for the SAME sex? Yes, that’s my situation right now. Do you consider yourself gay or bisexual? How strongly do you feel about it? For a while I thought I was bi because I liked Gab and had small crushes on some guys we were friends with in high school. It was also because everyone in school who also liked girls considered themselves bi, so me thinking I was bi was mostly an environment thing and I just thought I was one of them as well, because it was all I heard about. Through the years other orientations were given awareness, and eventually I found that demisexuality is most fitting for me. Have you ever had your heart broken? Many times in a lot of ways. Did you ever honestly believe you were going to marry your high school bf/gf? I mean, I still think that until now. Is it harder to get dumped or do the dumping? I’ve only been on one side of this so I wouldn’t know how to compare. Have you been able to stay good friends with any of your exes? Yes, but it took a while before we could mend our friendship. We couldn’t talk to each other for a couple of months but we patched things up after realizing our friendship was too important to throw away just because of a breakup. If so, is there any tension (sexual or not) between the two of you? There was, after a short while lol. Hence us getting back together anyway. Would you ever date someone that your friend liked or HAD dated? I wouldn’t do that. When was the last time you were kissed? First week of March. Are you a virgin? Do you believe virginity is "sacred"? No and no. How many times have you been in love? Was it always real? Once and yes. Stage three: Friendships. Would you say that you have a lot of friends? Yep. I’m really glad I’ve met a lot of progress when it comes to this. All I wanted in Grade 6 was one friend and now I have more friends than I ever imagined having, so it feels pretty awesome. Have you ever been considered to be a "loner"? Yeah, throughout elementary and some parts of high school. People would only talk to you if you shared the same interests, and back then I couldn’t find anyone who was like me. It made it hard to talk to anyone period because everyone already had their own set of friends. How often do you hang out with your friends? I obviously can’t now, but before the lockdown I would hang out with at least one friend a day. There’s always at least one person at our org lounge so it was easy to find someone to study with, get street food with, have lunch with, etc. Do you have a specific hang out or house that you go to? Yeah, the org lounge that we call Skywalk. It’s habit for anyone in the org to just drop by there when we have free time, or if we wanna hang out together. If my orgmates and I don’t feel like being at Skywalk, we go to a nearby bar called Tomato Kick. I have another friend group that includes Angela, and for that bunch we typically go to another local bar in the area for cocktails and shisha. Have you ever done anything illegal to help a friend? Other than giving them movie files I’ve pirated...no not really lol If not, would you be willing to? What would be your limit? Eh, I don’t like breaking the rules so I probably wouldn’t go all that far to begin with. Who is your best friend? VERY best. Choose. Angela. Have any of your friends ever stabbed you in the back? Yes, but they’re not my friends anymore. Did you forgive them? Are you still friends? No and no. Are your friends the only people that "get you"? I don’t think so. I’ve become pretty flexible through the years and can mostly adjust depending on who I’m with. Do you think your friends know you better than your own parents? They absolutely do. Have you ever lost a close friend because they died? I didn’t count Nacho as a close friend (cause I’m super particular about that title lol), but he was my friend all the same. Have you ever lost a friend because they gained a bf/gf and dropped you? No, this hasn’t happened. Are your friends your support system? =] Yes. Stage four: Family Life Are both your parents alive? They are. Were you raised by your biological parents? Technically I was raised by my grandma for most of my childhood haha, but yeah both my parents were present. Has your family ever been broken? I have an aunt (dad’s sister) who has had a couple unsuccessful relationships, but nothing in my immediate family. Do you think your parents respect your space? My dad does, which I hugely appreciate. My mom doesn’t know the basic rules of privacy and has never even learned how to knock. She just barges in, which puts me in a sour mood literally every single time she does it. Are you close with you siblings, if you have any? I’m a little close with my sister, like we crack jokes together and never fight and stuff, but not emotionally close. For instance I wasn’t able to physically comfort her when her cat died, but I made sure to flood her Messenger with messages to let her know I cared. I don’t have any relationship with my brother whatsoever. How often does your family fight or have big arguments? We don’t normally fight as a family. It’s mostly me and my mom who butt heads. Does your family hold very high religious beliefs? My mom does... we’re just forced to go along with it because she’s a bit of a brat and if we don’t do things her way, she’ll slam doors and bump against us on purpose, petty shit like that to let her know she isn’t happy. Are you the "black sheep" of your household? I used to be. I was a handful to deal with and there was just a lot of angst inside of me; and I attribute that to the abuse I got from my mom early on, which I’ve never gotten a resolution or closure to. Throughout my teen years she was able to twist the story and surface as the wonderful mother while I was the troubled teen that would never amount to anything, so it definitely looked like I was the black sheep. Thankfully I rose above it as I got older. Have you ever in anger told your parent(s) that you hated them? No. How often are you diciplined or punished or grounded? This has only happened a handful of times. Grounding isn’t common here and as mean as my mom was, she liked sticking to verbal abuse than punishment. The worst thing my parents did was take my gadgets and that only happened like twice. Do you feel like you are allowed to express yourself inside your own home? No. I have a whole-ass four-year relationship my parents have no clue about. Are your parents very controlling of the person "they want you to be"? Nope, they give me freedom which I give them credit for. They never told me what course they wanted me to take in college, what career they want for me, none of that stuff. Your family really does love each other, doesn't it? I guess. It could always be a little more, though. Are you planning to move away when you turn 18? I’m 22 now and I’m still here, so.

[alicedoessurveys]

Stage one: Emotions.

How often do you take actions you regret? not often, im very much someone who thinks things through first (sometimes too much) but will occasionally do things regret 

Do you often feel guilty? yes Do you have a short temper? sometimes, depends on how my emotions are and what time of month it is... 

When was the last time you lashed out at someone? I cant remember  And why was that? I cant remember

Does it always seem like the entire world is out to get you? right now yes Have you ever had a serious mental break down? im living one right now tbh

What led up to this? (sadness, depression, fury, confusion, etc) not coping well with my illness, then covid invade and lockdown happened, I lost my job, im living with parents that don't like each other and cant afford to move out  Do you believe it is just natural for humans to feel lonely? yes, I think we have this natural thing in us to find people to share our lives with Do you ever feel lonely, even in the presence of those you know or love? all the time yes Do you believe that these are the “best years of your life”? absolutely not. I know people say your twenties are supposed to be but mine have been pure shit. I was diagnosed with a incurable illness literally right before I turned 20 and ive been dealing with that since Or do you follow the “the best is yet to come” philosophy? I try to believe that the best years are ahead  Does it sometimes feel like your life is being wasted or not going anywhere? yes, right now especially because I want to be out there working but ive lost the job I loved and cant find another because everything locked down Tell me about the last time you were truly, truly happy. the day I met my niece and cuddled her for the first time. I remember looking down at her as she held my finger and I just was so excited for all the adventures we are going to have together

Stage two: Relationships.

How long was your longest relationship? 3 months... cant believe it took me that long to realise he was a dick How old were you when you had your first boyfriend or girlfriend? 23 Do you (or have you ever) had feelings for the SAME sex? I have yes but I don't get the urge to act on those feelings Do you consider yourself gay or bisexual? How strongly do you feel about it? I don't know. I have more crushes on guys but have had the occasional girl crush too, but I wouldn't want to act on anything. but then again, I don't get the urge to act on feeling towards guys either so maybe im asexual? I honestly don't know but im not stressing about it Have you ever had your heart broken? yes Did you ever honestly believe you were going to marry your high school bf/gf? I didn't have one so nope Is it harder to get dumped or do the dumping? both hurt just the same I think  Have you been able to stay good friends with any of your exes? yes, although we don't really talk anymore If so, is there any tension (sexual or not) between the two of you? we did kiss once but it was nothing  Would you ever date someone that your friend liked or HAD dated? it depends on the situation but doubt it no When was the last time you were kissed? last year, I miss having someone to kiss ngl Are you a virgin? Do you believe virginity is “sacred”? I am. I don't think its sacred and honestly don't see the big deal but I am one of those wait till marriage or at least wait till you're certain this is your person kind of people How many times have you been in love? Was it always real? never Stage three: Friendships.

Would you say that you have a lot of friends? I have a lot of acquaintances, a few friends and two best friends Have you ever been considered to be a “loner”? not really  How often do you hang out with your friends? usually like every other week but cause of lockdown I haven't properly in months  Do you have a specific hang out or house that you go to? usually the cinema, or round at once of our houses Have you ever done anything illegal to help a friend? don't think so, if I did it would be something minor  If not, would you be willing to? What would be your limit? depends how major it was. like if he said rob a bank with me or commit murder then nope. but like, drive a bit faster because im running late then yeah but even then id still be safe  Who is your best friend? VERY best. Choose. rhys Have any of your friends ever stabbed you in the back? yes Did you forgive them? Are you still friends? some yes, some no  Are your friends the only people that “get you”? no Do you think your friends know you better than your own parents? yes Have you ever lost a close friend because they died? no Have you ever lost a friend because they gained a bf/gf and dropped you? yes Are your friends your support system? =] yes Stage four: Family Life

Are both your parents alive? yes Were you raised by your biological parents? yes Has your family ever been broken? not my immediate family, but right now they're close to breaking  Do you think your parents respect your space? not really  Are you close with you siblings, if you have any? very close How often does your family fight or have big arguments? right now every bloody day  Does your family hold very high religious beliefs? yes Are you the “black sheep” of your household? no Have you ever in anger told your parent(s) that you hated them? no I never use that word directed at someone  How often are you diciplined or punished or grounded? never, im 25. but even as a kid I was well behaved  Do you feel like you are allowed to express yourself inside your own home? to a degree yes, but also no. im not allowed to swear around dad and im not allowed to get a rabbit Are your parents very controlling of the person “they want you to be”? not really Your family really does love each other, doesn’t it? I hope so  Are you planning to move away when you turn 18? im 25 now and desperate to move into my own space but cant afford to 

[ongfreestyle]

Coffee and College

A Jaehyun college coffee bullet au that ZERO people asked for

So anyway, you're in your second year of college and you're in the groove of things (kinda) and all is well

You're on your way to your 9am French I class on the first day and you feel your phone vibrating

It's your bf and you smile thinking "aaww it's our 3yr anniversary n he's calling already to say good morning"

More like... goodbye

Yep. 8:45am he calls you to dump you in the driest most uncool way

"listen. I just ... I know this is random, but....I don't wanna do this anymore."

"oh. Uh. What? Sorry I didn't hear you?"

"I'm sorry, I just can't do this anymore I want to break up with you. I'm sorry."

"oh. Ok. Fine. Sure. Umm...if you wanna talk about it later. Then...yeah..I have French class now bye."

End of call and start of class

Yep you're third row from the back and you plan to pay attention to the syllabus talk and following lesson but

You're definitely tearing up

Like literally WHO DOES THAT?? Just dumps you at 8am no explanation??

So anyways there are teardrops on your notes now and ink isn't tear proof so...rip

Anyways thirty minutes in and your head in kinda just down and you're kinda just crying quietly

And then this kid slides into the seat next to you

He's v late

And v cute even through the tears

And he's smiling really big even though the teacher just scolded him

He sets his coffee down and looks at you wiping snot and tears away and he hands you a napkin from his bag

You take it and mutter a "thanks"

And a moment later he slides his coffee to you too

"I didn't drink it yet"

"it's an espresso, extra caffeine"

"I made it myself"

And he's back to taking notes

And you're still kinda pouting, but it's been 45+ mins so you try to at least write down the homework assignment

And you decide to sip the stupid espresso it's actually pretty good

The next day you find yourself at the school cafeteria and guess who it is??

Espresso boy!!

And it turns out that he's even cuter in uniform!

You go to order some food and he greets you with a big smile

"feeling better today?"

"kinda"

"rough day yesterday, huh?"

"yeah. Can I have a breakfast burrito?"

"no coffee?"

"no, but thanks for the free coffee yesterday. It helped. I owe you one"

"no you don't, it's on the house. And so the one I'm about to make you next. It's today's special!"

Who are you to deny another free coffee? So you take his offer and a few minutes later you're at your table eating your breakfast and doing your French homework

And the special coffee is really good

Then one of your friends comes by and is giving you a weird look

"are you drinking the nasty coffee from the cafeteria??"

"yep. Its actually really good"

And your friend's like ??? "It's usually bitter and gross tho ?? Like 10 times outta 10"

And you shrug and get back to work and your friend grabs some food and starts doing their work too

The day goes on and finally you get some time to yourself to think about yesterday

Your ex hasn't called or texted. Nothing. And it just hits you like wow. I'm. Single.

Cool.

Except not cool because you got no closure or explanation and ouch.

So you hate it but just like yesterday, you're crying again. Just. Uglier crying.

And your roommate comes back and is like "awww sweetie, fuck him"

And she says if you wipe your face she'll take you out for ice cream

So fuck the snot and tears, you want some damn ice cream

And out you go!!

Free ice cream you two stop at a park on campus and there's a basket game going on

And your roommate is like SKSSKDJS "LOOK IT'S JOHNNY SKSJDJ"

English??

"that means holy shit it's the hottest tallest nicest guy in school and he's playing basketball look at his ARMS BITCH"

So guess who's watching a pickup game of bball while eating ice cream?

You two!

Oh and guess who else is playing and is red and sweaty and had a nice jump shot?

Coffee boy.

Yup and you might not be interested in the Score, but dammit the view was nice

The game ends and Johnny is the first to come over to the side lines n greet your roommate

She's batting her eyelashes and telling him he did amazing even tho they lost

And he's smiling and chugging water as he goes on talking and coffee boy and a few of his friends are on the sidelines now looking at you

Coffee Boy is the first to say hi and all you can do is say hi back

And thank him for the coffee again

He shrugs, "no problem. Coffee fixes almost everything in college"

Almost everything. And there's an awkward silence

"see you around." He says and he walks away

Like that you never find out his name and life moves on

French class is going well and you sit in the front now and coffee boy is always late and sits in the back

You really don't do anything except exchange glances

Then midterms are coming up and you are a bit panicked bc u definitely neglected French studies

So like any good college student you cram like hell

In the library at midnight you're trying to learn vocabulary, conjugations, grammar points

You look insane by 1am bit you can't stop then you hear someone coming I'm the library

It's (literally if you can guess by now) coffee boy

And he's got 4 coffee cups in a holder with him and a huge backpack

He spots you and waves

"mind if I sit with you?"

"mind if I claim two of the coffees?"

"there all yours" and he sits next to you and slides the holder to you just like when you first met

"I made them myself"

"so you make these awesome brews?"

"yeah the schools coffee recipe is shitty."

"well maybe you should major in business and open a coffee shop. They're really good."

"maybe I will"

And you two study quietly and you peek over to see him going over French vocab

"let's quiz each other?"

"sure"

And it's 2am and you guys realize you're both fukced

Like. No vocab is sticking and the coffee had you two literally SHAKING

And by 3am you guys are just cracking up

"I never learned your name coffee boy"

"Jaehyun. Jung Jaehyun."

"well. Good luck with the test tomorrow because I. Give. Up."

And you get up to leave and he offers to walk you home and you accept for safety reasons

"I'm glad to see you so happy. You're pretty like that."

"I'm an ugly crier, huh"

"kinda."

"okay, not the gentleman answer, but I admire your honesty"

"thanks. I hope you have a good night"

Yeah the walk back was not long at all. Too bad because you really were enjoying your time

But 9am French !!!

Midterms are over after a week and it's back to the daily grind

But days are way better when you have French now bc Jaehyun sits next to you (when he's on time and the seats open) and you guys joke around alot during speaking practice

He's brings you a new coffee everyday and asks you how it tastes and what he should add or take away

And you kinda hang out at the cafeteria now so you can talk to him while he's working

Ooppsss you have developed a small™ crush on Jaehyun and it's not going away anytime soon

You even open up to him about why you crying the day you met (tho u vowed to NVR speak of it again)

Yeah now the crush is nvr dying :)))

Bc your friends notice that you always go watch him play b-ball even tho it's not a REAL game

And he always has a coffee for you

And you two are always studying French

But like...you guys are making questionable grades...so...what's up??

NOTHING

French I finals are coming and you and Jaehyun are at your usual spot in the library, except this time YOU bought HIM coffee

"what brand ?"

"gross school brand that you didn't make, but is LOADED with caffeine"

"gross. Hand me one"

"cheers!"

And it's study time

But he's not focused

Like he never is and neither are you, but it's really off now

"is it that bad?"

"the coffee? Yeah. And my French grade? It's even worse. I won't make French 2."

And you're like WTF WTF NO FRENCH 2 WITH JAEHYUN YOUR CRUSH WHO LITERALLY GOT YOU THRU THIS SEMESTER ????

"Jaehyun. We are going to fix your grade with this final. I SWEAR."

You're like REAL STUDY MODE: ON

And he has this small smile on his face.

Sly....

"what?"

"you WANT me in your French 2 class don't you?"

"uuhhh-duhh free coffee to keep me up during le snooze fest"

"you know it's not free. It comes outta my pay check"

"okay, then I owe it to you to get you to pass this class and get to French 2"

"I guess."

Yeah. You're DRILLING info into ur heads ,,,, but Jaehyun is like ____ blank.

So you kinda snap

"yo do u wanna fail??? At least TRY!"

"I can't focus. I'm confused about something."

"past tense conjugations?"

"you."

Pause.

"I can't tell if you're over your ex. You took it hard and I'm trying to wait, but..."

???????????

"my ex? My ex is my ex...I'm over that"

"you never really brought it up much. I wouldn't know."

"Past tense."

"and also. The coffee."

"your coffee is good! I'm serious, Jaehyun!"

"yeah, but do like me...? Or my coffee?"

"both?"

Jaehyun is not making this easy for you okay

"I mean, if I didn't bring you coffee, would you still hang with me? Teach me French n stuff?"

"of course."

"so you...........like......me?"

HELL YES, but you settle for a simple yep

Then he just looks at you seriously

"you LIKE me LIKE me..like....LIKE LIKE?"

"uuhh...if I understood all of the likes right, then....yeah. I do like you."

OH AND THAT DOES IT

He is so reeeeeedddd

Like this boy GONE

You. His crush. Likes. Him. Wtf

Yeah he cannot quit grinning

And when you move on from the topic he can't focus on a single word you're saying

Finals day comes and you feel okay about your score and Jaehyun said he wants to leave it in the past

And you two go hang out at the cafeteria

And he's looking at you across the table

Randomly he just smiles at you

"I..wanna be your boyfriend...."

bc y'all nvr because s/o's officially soooo

Your heart rate

Lemme draw it

/\/\/\/\_______💀

Wow

He said it so cutely

Damn that's crazy bc you would love if he was your bf

And when you say that!!

Reference to drawing

After becoming official you two are like the cutest couple ever

And you go to French 2 and he's back in French 1

He got a 58 on the final :/

But OH WELL you're his tutor now

And you guys actually study

And he doesn't feel like he has to bribe you with coffee to make you like him

So with some hard work you both kick your caffeine addictions

And you guys spend the days making stupid jokes and playing basketball together

Cramming for French while high on 4 coffees each

(old habits die hard)

And you two tease each other so much

It's a miracle you get any work done really

Jaehyun passes his French 1 class with an A+ and he literally runs to your dorm to tell you

You crash into each other

He holds you to steady you

And hes like "babe I passed"

"that's great!"

"it's all thanks to you I could kiss you, but I have coffee breath and-"

"that's nothing new"

Okay and cue the totally cheesy kiss

Where Jaehyun's like "you're right, but our first kiss should be special"

Valentine Boy is a ROMANTIC okay

But it doesn't matter

You can't resist leaning in

And he lets out a fake groan like he hasn't been dying to kiss you since he first saw u snotting all over your notes

Yep he liked you then.

And the lean in was so slow, but when your lips met it was worth it

And the coffee taste.... wasn't so bad anyway

[niksixx]

Momma, I need your call on this

So, I dated this guy long distance for 2 and a half years. He was my first truly serious bf and I was his first truly serious gf. July of 2019, he breaks it off because he didn't think I could handle the lifestyle of a military wife. We keep in contact, more or less.

A couple months later, I've got a new bf and he's still single. But then he tells me drunkenly one night that he wants me back and that he fucked up. I try to console him cause I'm a people-pleasing doormat, but he's just so desperately trying to get back with me.

For months after, he keeps trying to seduce me and get me to cheat. I block and unblock him a few times, but he always finds a workaround and I end up pitying him and reopening contact because he was still my first love and I do still care about his well-being.

April this year, my new bf dumps me and I inform my ex. He thinks it means I'll get back with him, but after them two and other guys before, my trust issues are seriously fucked. Ex spends the next couple of months begging me to try again. I tell him I'm not interested, but I want to keep him as a friend cause at this point, he's one of my only friends who's talked to me almost once a week for 4+ years.

About a month ago, he tells me about a girl he met and I'm genuinely pumped for him. She's adorable and sweet-looking and actually lives near him. I hoped we could keep talking, but he's pretty much cut contact.

I'm super happy for him, but some part of me feels like I lost a best friend. What's worse is that he never saw me as a non-sexual friend if he feels he can't talk to me when he's not single anymore. I just miss him, but I can't say that, or he'll think it means I still love him and I don't. I just want the guy I sent memes to back and I want the one who told me I was being stupid if I had a ridiculous idea. Is it reasonable to feel heartbroken over something like this?

You can’t control how you feel, and I do think it’s reasonable to feel like you’re heartbroken and lost someone special. However, ask yourself a few questions: Would a true friend try to seduce you and get you to cheat when he knows you’re in a relationship? Can you truly be just friends with someone you had romantic love for in the past? If he never saw you as a non-sexual friend, what does that say about him?

Maybe he shouldn’t have cut off contact so abruptly, but there absolutely needs to be boundaries and it’s not a bad thing. Try to place yourself in his new girl’s shoes. There’s a good chance she knows you and him had something in the past. It’s okay to remember the past, but you can’t let it affect your future. Truthfully, cutting off contact with you most likely came from him and his new girl discussing boundaries. My opinion? I don’t believe people can be friends with a past romantic partner. There will always be some type of feelings. It is okay to miss him or better yet, some of the great memories you guys had together. But as you’ve mentioned, you don’t want him back (romantically). And just remember, there’s a reason you don’t love him anymore. Unfortunately what happens, at least in this generation, friends get pushed aside or completely forgotten about when others get into a relationship. And sometimes there’s nothing we can do about it except hold onto some good memories and be happy for them. I hope this brought you some clarity 💖