#so much. i hate him i hate him!!!!! ... but also i really don't... BUT ALSO I HATE HIM! he's mean and so smug

[quicksilversnails]

It's so fun how the Princess and the Dragon acknowledges and plays with game mechanics that are assumed to be non-diegetic, and uses them to add insight to the story/characters.

The title card is a really obvious example, being something that TLQ actually sees and can comment on, and something that the Princess hadn't ever seen. What most would assume is just a framing device for the player is a real element of the world/construct.

I think it emphasizes how the story that the Narrator constructed is only "meant" to be told to TLQ. After all, The Narrator only appears in TLQ's mind, providing elaborate descriptions and attempting to contextualize the events of the game as a heroic task to save the world. Meanwhile the Princess is all alone, with no title cards or exposition, no context for why any of this is happening to her. The story revolves around her, but it doesn't care about her beyond her designated role, as something to be slain and hated. Her perspective is irrelevant to the Narrator's plan, so she doesn't get the fancy presentation or necessary context: she doesn't deserve it.

There's also those long stretches of dialogue where the voices talk to each other in TLQ's mind without progressing the story. They're occasionally acknowledged by the Princess elsewhere (Prisoner, Nightmare) but P&tD makes it very explicit and confirms that time is actively passing during these conversations, with TLQ staring in silence for who knows how long.

(Personally I don't think all of the voice dialogue is necessarily in real time, if only because some Princesses wouldn't have had the patience for it. Like if you had really stood still for that long, the Beast would've definitely eaten you... she's not waiting for you to finish thinking lol)

This one I think is more for humour, but it also draws attention to how much of the inner conversation the Princess is missing in normal chapters, when the voices aren't actively speaking to her through TLQ's body. Where we're having vibrant debates or key information revealed by the Narrator, she just sees a silent, staring figure. Speaking of the Narrator, He's completely absent from the Princess' POV, either because He doesn't want to speak to her or is somehow unable to (He does say in Tower that she's not supposed to be able to interact with Him...) Again, the story was not made to be told to her, so she isn't given His context, and because the player is usually so immersed in TLQ's perspective, they probably wouldn't realize just how much she's missing until they see things from her perspective.

One other example: if you choose to [Say nothing] immediately after you excise yourself, the Princess reacts to it:

I just find this so hilarious tbh, and the fact that she repeats back those exact words implies that she literally senses the text written in brackets. If you do it once you're back in the basement, she says this:

I wonder if it's the same for the Narrator/voices... do they also “feel” your actions while you’re choosing them? Do they hear you say (Lie) before you lie? When Skeptic said "Wink" out loud did he actually choose a dialogue option with [Wink] in brackets?? Ok that last one's a joke but there's lots of potential here

I just think it's cool because the average player wouldn't think twice about any of these things, because they seem like simple stylistic/game design choices. In a game where all player input is through dialogue options, the square brackets are an immediately understandable way to convey action, as opposed to plain text. In a game structured around repeating loops, it makes sense to make those loops distinguishable for players by separating each loop with a title card, and the chapter naming convention works as a nod to the fairytale storybook aesthetics the game draws from.

But by placing you into the Princess's head and acknowledging those design choices as diegetic elements that change depending on your perspective, it forces you to reevaluate your experiences: the things you didn't think were really "part of the game" and the experiences you didn't realize weren't universal. It exposes your hidden privileges, the luxuries and structural supports you have compared to the Princess that you don't even notice because you've never experienced the alternative.

It might make you realize how the way you perceive and conceptualize the world might be very different from how others conceptualize it (Tony's recent ask about the multicoloured glass in HEA could also play into this in a fascinating way, with the mismatch in perception between TLQ and the Narrator's script). It's all just very cool for a game that's based on perception.

It also makes me wonder... what other elements of this game are diegetic that we just haven't paid attention to?

Well, I think that the captions are probably also diegetic. TLQ occasionally refers to the voices by their complete titles despite them not ever referring to each other by those titles, instead opting for descriptors like "jumpy one" or "the worst one" or "rage boy" or "chilly little freak" lol. For a direct comparison, Paranoid exclusively calls Smitten "the lovesick one" or some variant in HEA, but TLQ refers to him by his full name using quotation marks, as if he's quoting something he's read:

The voices don't seem aware that these titles exist, while TLQ does, despite them sharing a mind. Also, when the Princess shares a body/mind with you, she never uses their titles either. In the Spectre/Princess and the Dragon, she calls Hero "the nice one", Cold "the quiet one" or "cold little freak", and the Narrator "the bossy one" or "that murder-happy know-it-all". Spectre describes the voices as shards of broken glass on the floor, so she likely perceives them completely differently to how we/TLQ see them.

Even The Narrator isn't aware of His title. If you call Him that in the mirror conversation, He says "'The Narrator'. I suppose that's my job, isn't it?", reacting to the title as if it's His first time hearing about it. There's also this question from the fourth Shifty encounter:

It seems like the titles are presented specifically for The Long Quiet/decider, and that they somehow reflect how TLQ perceives the voices/Narrator, since TLQ takes credit for "calling him" that. If the captions were specifically shown to TLQ in the same way that the title cards are, it'd explain how he has this information without it ever being verbally told to him, and why the Princess doesn't know their titles even when she's sharing your body.

But besides the captions, I think it could be fun to interpret the game as if most, if not all of its game mechanics exist in-universe. The choice menu, the music, the cursors, the save/load icons, saving/loading in general, the title screen, the Clown Princess living in the walls (game files), you name it. Let’s peel away these game mechanics cell by cell! Let's see what meaning we can find together, let's see what we're made of!

[genderqueerdykes]

For the transmasc voices: (tw suicidal thoughts, transandrophobia)

I'm messaging on behalf of my son. I'm NB, wife is transfem, our child is transmasc. He's only 11. He came out a few years ago, is allowed to freely explore and express, and at home he has a great support system.

But he has ALREADY struggled with suicidal thoughts, anxiety, and stress, not just from cishet classmates but from queer peers. He has ALREADY tried to APOLOGIZE for IDing as masc, due to intracommunity reactionary hate. We are ALREADY doing damage control, we have him in therapy, we make sure to celebrate him and lift him up at every opportunity.

He's fucking ELEVEN YEARS OLD and is already being heavily negatively stressed by our own fucking community. His PEERS are also, only 11-13 years old.

This intracommunity bullshit, this deliberate misandry and transandrophobia, is contagious. The children are ALWAYS watching and the vast majority of them do NOT have parents 'in the know' or even supportive, let alone any kind of digital supervision; they SEE YOU. They INTERNALIZE WHAT YOU SAY. They SPREAD IT and they are MIMICKING YOUR FIGHTS.

And when our community screams 'fuck men' 'men are trash' 'yes all men' 'they deserve this' those little caveats of 'oh but not trans men!!' don't actually do shit for anyone except make y'all pat yourselves on the back for being soooo progressive and inclusive. Worse still when they don't even bother with the caveats and just straight up refuse to ever consider nor allow anyone ELSE to consider the unique intersection (yes!! Intersectional fucking theory have y'all heard of it!!!) of both privilege and oppression experienced by transmascs, which is different from the unique *intersection* of oppressions experienced by transfems, which is still different from the unique *intersectional experiences* of still others, and insist no, actually, they're all only the same and actually only transfems can speak at all about any of this and trans men don't have unique experiences and can't have their own language and blah blah blah blah fucking blah.

I can literally see (and foot the bill for!) the harm y'all are doing to yourselves, each other, and to the next generation of queer kids and allies and I am so fucking tired of it. Reactionary hate is communal fucking poison and it ALWAYS involves friendly fire.

oh my god i am mortified but thank you so much for sending this. first of all, i wanted to deeply apologize for what is happening to your son, i have more to say about and to him later, but i want you to know i am very glad you chose to reach out. this affected me in a very real way. i'm not being funny here. a lot of asks don't really get to me, but this struck me like an arrow to the heart and i seriously need people to very carefully read this ask and internalize it. im serious. even if it makes you cry, please re-read it a couple of times. even if you seriously think it's okay to hate men. read this.

men don't just pop into the world men. they're boys first a lot of the time. would you people seriously fucking rather see dead trans boys than living trans men? because that is what you're doing. your incessant gender essentialist bullshit is legitimately getting trans CHILDREN scarred for fucking life and potentially killed. you are potentially actually for real taking a life when you say these things- but are you so happy knowing that there's childrens' blood on your hands?

your son deserves so much better than this holy SHIT. an 11 year old should NOT be having suicidal thoughts, especially over their GENDER. this is not petty internet drama anymore. this is affecting the real world. this is affecting real people. y'all seem to forget that there's a living, breathing person behind every single account you interact with (aside from obvious bots). there are people behind these posts. and you are genuinely affecting them. sure it sounds like a quirky clapback to say "all men should die" or whatever but what about when you say that to someone and it actually kills a man? what about when you're genuinely responsible for ending a life by what you've said and done?

are you prepared to console that man's family? are you prepared to apologize for what you did? are you prepared to understand that this has real life consequences and can literally tear families apart? are you prepared to understand that many parents, including mothers, love their sons? that many people love their relatives who are men? that many people love their husbands and partners? that this would hurt women in a very real way? whether or not you hate all men doesn't matter, but not all women think like this, and this can and will devastate real people in real time. this will hurt women way more than you think.

i wanted to say that i'm glad he has a good support system with you. it must be very comforting to know he has a NB parent to help advocate for him as a trans child. a child. i can't get over that. he should be living his life carefree. he should be playing with other kids, discovering new hobbies, learning about how other people go about their lives, and having fun, but instead he's getting tortured and mocked? for what reason? he's not a tyrant now. he's a boy. boys don't have any power in society. children are not an oppressive class. holy shit

you are doing a great thing by advocating for him. i will do my best to make sure i can, too. i don't need to know your or his name for right now, but i will make sure that i tell his story, because this is beyond fucked up. people need to understand this isn't about views on tiktok and likes on instagram. this is about real people who are hurting. you don't deserve to have to see your child go through all of this intense therapy and pain and suffering. this needs to come to an end.

if you want to share this part of the message with him, i'd like to address him directly. i just wanted to say, that i'm 32 years old, and i realized i was a trans man when i was about 20. i didn't learn the word transgender until i was 19 years old. if i had an awesome NB parent who helped me learn about it at your age, i would've been out as transmasculine, too! i was scared for a while, but some of the happiest years of my life have been while i've been out as a trans guy. i wear what i want now, i talk how i want to, i present how i want to, i love who i want to, and i don't let any of this invalidate me for who i am as a man. i only talk to people who respect me, and there are tons of people out there who love us and see us for who we really are

you're not going to deal with this forever. people are being really, really mean right now, but it's not going to be like this forever. there are a lot of other transmascs out there. if you find other trans boys around your age, do your best to stick with them if they're good to you. it's okay to be a trans boy and its okay to want to be friends with other trans boys. you're not a bad person. you're not mean. you're an awesome kid who's taking the time to explore gender now that it's something you can understand. that's really cool, why wouldn't that be cool?

try not to let them get to you. they are not confident in how they identify and how they feel about themselves. they're taking it out on you. your life matters, it matters so much. other trans boys out there will be so happy to know you exist. you deserve a long, happy life. there's nothing wrong with being a boy or man. we're not bad people. we're capable and deserving of love just like everyone else. your gender isn't anyone else's business. chase your happiness.

[missdynamighttt]

This is not a request or anything like that, I just wanted to know which MHA guys would be willing to have a threesome, as canon and as less OOC as possible in your opinion!

⋆˚࿔ kia's note ˚⋆ FINALLY FINALLY OH MY GOD IVE BEEN WAITING FOR THIS, THANK YOU SO MUCH NONNIE. THE REQUESTS I GET ARE NICE BUT THEY ARE KINDA OOC AND PURE ON HARDCORE PORN IM NOT SURE IM USED TO YET.

NO TO THREESOME:

katsuki bakugo, shoto todoroki, tenya iida

honestly? i get these requests but i dont believe they'd be into that or want to do it. its a nice thought but its more that they just want you all to themselves.

they dont believe in sharing. plus, with the lack of intimacy they grew up with, it took AWHILE before yall have mindblowing sex. they won't let another person see how beautiful you look, when its supposed to be all for him.

its more of an ego thing for katsuki. even if you wanted to, his pride couldn't take it. besides, he can take care of you all by himself. he doesn't need another dick, or even a dildo to have you screaming and crying out in pleasure. and if it was a girl, he'd probably just ignore her anyway.

"sure as hell ain't sharin' you, sugar, thats for sure. tch, c'mere, gimme a kiss. i'll show you why my dick's all you need. gonna fuck these stupid ideas outta that pretty little head of yours."

meanwhile, shoto and iida is just reluctant. like i mentioned, it took you awhile in the relationship before hes fucking you so good. it also just feels weird when another person sees him like that, when its only all for you to see.

"my love... as... exciting, as the idea is, i don't think i like it. is that okay? i'm sorry. i'll make it up to you. now spread these legs for me, c'mon. i'll eat you out real good, i promise."

WILLING TO TRY:

sero hanta, kirishima eijirou, midoriya izuku

they wouldn't say outright no but not outright yes either. they're reluctant because another person would see you all vulnerable like that but the idea of bringing you more pleasure gets his dick really hard.

"it.. depends who its with, mi amor. i dont like it but i don't hate it. let's make a list, yeah? narrow it down and shit and we'll see." (y'all end up picking denki.)

"that's.. not what i was expecting. don't get me wrong, i don't hate it. its hot but its a little weird, y'know what i mean? okay, good. who to ask? bakugo would kill me... mina? she would too. but i'll ask." (she said hell yeah)

"oh! um... sure, why not? i'm not sure who we could ask, though.. maybe kacchan? oh! or, uraraka-san maybe. i'll call him and you call her." (both of them said yes but y'all decided on katsuki. you got drunk on both of their dicks real good.)

YES TO THREESOME:

denki kaminari

i think y'all know why he says yes. this man is kinky as shit, no denying that. he's a pervert but he's not a maniac like mineta. the image of you all fucked out taking on 2 cocks or kissing another woman while you're bouncing on his cock and he's eating her out.. its hot.

the challenging thing here was finding someone who was willing to have a threesome with him though. the person who ended up saying yes was sero. i imagine using both of their quirks to real good use, like bondage or shocking your needy clit.

"fuck, fuck, fuck. yeah? you like getting fucked by that, don't cha? c'mon baby, fuck his cock like you mean it, c'mon."

‎‧₊˚✧[ it's me, kia ! ]✧˚₊‧ ｡ﾟ•┈꒰ა ♡ ໒꒱┈�� ｡ﾟ ‎‧₊˚✧[ more of katsuki ! ]✧˚₊‧

[jinlin-at-the-moon]

so a few days ago i was thinking about this post+comic, and i thought that while svsss luo binghe probably wouldn't try to Actually kill liu qingge, pidw luo binghe absolutely would. ergo, imagine, if you will. an au where peerless cucumber doesn't transmigrate in as shen qingqiu, but airplane still becomes shang qinghua. due to plot differences, airplane-bro doesn't really care about what the hell kind of drama the other peak lords are getting up to, but still somehow happens to knock over a book or something- something that, through bullshit plot contrivance butterfly effect, somehow manages to let shen jiu actually save liu qingge in the lingxi caves.

some years pass, years where liu qingge is going through a fantastical knightly enemies to ??? where he slowly learns he may have initially misjudged this man who may not be the paragon of virtue but is nonetheless a person worthy of respect with a possible sordid past that resulted in a difficult disposition and now has to kneel down and admit then make up to his failures, as shen jiu is like "what kind of fucking scheme is he trying to pull", which results in like a weird strained kind of coworkers who Don't Talk About It type relationship. the immortal alliance conference still happens, everything proceeds as in canon, except- when bingge comes back from his 5-year internship in tartarus and does his pidw-canon-typical "destroy shen jiu's reputation and lock him up in the water prison" shenanigans, it turns out that liu qingge Can and Will try to break shen jiu out -not because he really likes the guy all that much, necessarily, but he has a life debt to pay back and also has already dragged his one (1) braincell through the grinder in order to realise his assumed-evil coworker is probably not actually one-dimensionally evil, so he feels complicated enough about it to try and get some actual answers in here - and if that involves kicking demon ass that's just a fun bonus. normally, all this would not be an issue for demon emperor luo binghe who has recently basically come into nigh full power if you discount xin mo being grumpy, because, as established he would not hesitate to kill his former shishu! in fact, he'd be very glad to do that! however, for item out of designated boundary reasons, liu qingge Will Not Fucking Die.

...cue clown music.

liu qingge has already sacrificed his last braincell to trying to comprehend his shattered worldview of shen jiu as a person and therefore he does not examine why he is Actually so determined to break him out, and also doesn't have enough brainpower to feel torn by the fact that duelling luo binghe every week is actually kind of fun (and also why he kind of has a boner about it). shen jiu has a moral crisis about the fact that the man who he's first hated then avoided for like over a decade is now the one guy who keeps trying to legitimately come back for him and is willing to risk death over and over in order to do that, and also that somehow this pisses the beast off enough to distract him from the whole revenge/ripping off limbs thing- except now he's for some reason coming down to the water prison to rant about it? luo binghe, for his part, does not know why he's ranting about it to shen jiu of all people (it started as taunting! then it became some kind of weird routine because that one guy just cannot cease being alive and what is UP with that) and while he does have enough braincells to question why fighting liu qingge every week feels more stable than any other relationship he's had in his life since his mother died, he absolutely refuses to examine it. none of them are making it out of this normal. the clown music gets louder every time they're in one location. huan hua keeps having to dish out more and more repair funds for the bai zhan war god's going ham most destructive. the three clowns are locked in a mario/peach/bowser dynamic stalemate none of them actually want to be in, but it's what fate has dealt, and some god is probably laughing at their miseries.

(meanwhile, god is not laughing. god is wondering what the fuck happened here and how it got to this point and also if this means he might put some of his fake-his-own-death plans on hold just to see what kind of bullshit happens next. ...god also really wishes he could invent popcorn.)

[dellamortethelesser]

I'm interested in your thoughts on Illario as the First Talon. Do you think he'd hate the position at first or he'd slot right into it as a natural? Do you think he wants the position just because Lucanis is going to have it or he actually wants it because he thinks he'd be good at it? Always interested in thoughts on him from people who also love him as a character! Especially since Wigmaker gave us so much of him, but so little too.

Illario and Lucanis are both presented to us in the Wigmaker Job as very capable assassins for very different reasons; Illario is charming, cunning, and diplomatic, meaning that he can talk his way in and out of most every situation and has an innate understanding of the politics of a situation, particularly of the Crows. Lucanis is quick on his feet, adaptive, and the more talented fighter, meaning that when it comes to an actual killing, he's going to get the job done.

I don't think Illario would be bad at the role of First Talon--in fact, I agree with the general consensus that he would be good at it, maybe even excel. I think his own evaluation of his own capabilities are accurate and that he has the drive and edge to lead the Crows as an assassin's guild. I don't think he's motivated solely by the fact that Lucanis is going to have it.

It's less about Lucanis 'having' the role of First Talon and more so about the fact that it's being GIVEN to him. It's not really about Lucanis at all in that sense, it's about the oversight from Caterina. It is obvious to everyone that Lucanis is the favorite pick for the role, including Lucanis, and Lucanis doesn't want it. But he won't tell Caterina that, and even if he doesn't say it, he does show it--and Caterina ignores it. A lack of willingness to consider Illario from either of them is what really pushes some of that ambition; when no one considers you, YOU must consider you.

I don't think he'd hate the position; I think he'd do well! I think he would hate what he would have to do to GET the position. We see that in Veilguard; to get what he thinks he wants he has to abandon what he has, and it nearly kills him. Lucanis and Illario and Caterina are all that the other has; Illario grieves that Lucanis didn't die and was tortured, Lucanis can't bring himself to kill Illario only maybe imprison him, and Caterina absolves the responsibility of deciding his fate onto Lucanis.

It would be a lonely outcome for Illario but I do think he meant it in the Wigmaker Job when he tells Lucanis that if he were First Talon, he wouldn't have to do "this" anymore; the Crows, the politicking. Maybe Lucanis would be free to do that whole freedom-fighter hero thing he's always trying to emulate. But they're both under Caterina's thumb, and until she's gone, we won't know.

[eclipseberrycake]

Poly! MoonBerryCake x Reader Pt. 9.5*

AN: The poll isn't over juuussst yet but I'm pretty sure of what is gonna win, so here we are <3 I do appreciate those voting for Roo's choice! Kissing your foreheads so softly rn /platonic So I kind of split the diff, you know? This was my choice was this part right here. Bc it makes me laugh. We get more MBC too, since I'm also going to start Part 10! Yay! Then I'll get back to requests! So, you'll get this today, then maybe part 10 either later tonight (Probably Tomorrow), then on Thursday I'll start requests again since Wednesday is my rest day!

ALSO also, people are figuring out my little clues and like I'm so proud of all of us. We're killing it, y'all are great at picking up the small nuances, Kissing you so gently on the forehead right now.

ALSO ALSO, also, I think the general consensus was that it's okay to give Reader a tail? I might hold off just for now to see if any objections come from it, but if there are none come part 11, I'll add it permanently! For this chapter, it's just a trial run! It's totally okay too if thats not something you guys want too, let me preface! If it turns out you guys try it, hate it, and want it gone I can come back and edit this part! Hence the "*" in the title!

Part One -> Part Two -> Part Three -> Part Four -> Part Five -> Part Six -> Part Six 1/2 -> Part Seven -> Part Eight -> Part Nine

Warnings: None, really, except for some of my personal ships. I don't wanna see any debate about them, this is mostly my preferences.

☁ He's watching you.

☁ He's watching you and you know it. You're momentarily ignoring it as you're elbow deep in the cookie jar, newly filed nails just barely brushing against a cookie at the very bottom. It makes you huff in annoyance at it before you're moving to kneel on the counter, hoping to reach further into the frankly too-larger-to-be-normal cookie jar. It just evades you're hand once more, and your tail gives a whip in annoyance.

☁ You would use the additional limb, but you've gotten in trouble more times than you could count with using your tail in the kitchen. Something about it getting too close to the Twisteds for it to be sanitary at all. You rolled your eyes at that, but since returning from your time as a Twisted, for a second time, you obeyed where you could.

☁ All while he's watching you struggle, hiding a poorly concealed snicker behind his blanket. It makes you huff once more before finally getting a finger on the cookie, making you grin. You hook it to the side, gently dragging it up so you can grab it, only for it to crumble.

☁ You let out a cry, retracting your cookie-less hand to stare in the jar, bewildered at the absolute audacity.

☁ This time he can't stop the laugh that spills out of him, making you glare at him. "You could've helped."

☁ "I could've." Astro agrees, standing from his chair, where he has a glass of milk and his own trio of cookies on a plate in front of him. "But where's the fun in that?"

☁ He walks over to the cookie jaw and reaches a longer arm in, making your tail wag behind you as you watch him grab one of the larger chunks of your broken treat. You quickly grab your set aside plate and hold it out for him to set the piece on the plate. One by one, every piece is set on the plate before he's pulling his arm back and putting the lid back on. It's flipped upside down so the top of the jar is facing the inside, signifying it's empty.

☁ With so many toons living in one area, it was easy for small things like an empty cookie jar to make tensions rise, so small things like that just made everything flow so much easier.

☁ You thank Astro with a happy little kiss, making him hum contentedly at your actions before you're both returning to the table. You have your own cup of milk as well, both of you picking up the tradition of a pre-bedtime snack a few months back. Or so you thought that's when it started.

☁ For Astro, this had always been the two of you's thing. Sprout and Cosmo baked, himself and Sprout went through old episodes together and the other handler rooms, even Cosmo and himself had scary movie nights. Everyone had their thing with each other, and cookies in the kitchen late at night was yours and his. This was the first place you told him about the Teagan and Rodger tension, which had grown exponentially. And as much as he tried to pretend he wasn't, he was a huge gossip.

☁ The familiar action of just you and him talking about everything going on, debriefing if one would, was something he held so dear and close to his chest, and he's sure you knew it too as you would never let more than three days pass before shaking him awake with a cheeky grin, nodding to the doorway.

☁ It reminded him of when he came back in all honesty. Never would that Astro ever have thought he would've been where he is now, with you and Cosmo and Sprout and Blu and everyone back, but as he is now, he would rather turn into a twisted again then give it up.

☁ His own tail gave a wag as he slid one of his cookies onto your plate, giving you The Look when you tried giving it back. You took it with a humored rool of your eyes, before rewrapping yourself in your own blanket, crossing your legs on your chair as you settled in.

☁ The lights were down low and gave your cheeks the softest orange tint and your eyes the softest of amber highlights. It made his tail wag at the sight of it, the silly thing giving away all of his emotions before he even had the chance to stop it.

☁ "So," You begin, folding your hands in front of you like it's a business meeting. "Check-in. How is Mr. Novalite doing?"

☁ He guffaws at the drop of his name, but copies your seated postion anyway with one pair of hands holding his blanket while the other twists with his tail to stop it from wagging like a lunatic. "I'm...content. Honestly. Sprout and I found some more sealed documents in Delilah's old room and are planning on looking through those soon. Cosmo and I have plans to watch that new Heretic movie that just came out. You and I are having our own date night. Plus, I know we all have a big date night coming up. Did you and Cosmo decide on what you wanted to do?"

☁ You nod, grinning happily as your own tail gives a wag. "Spa treatments then a movie night! We have it all planned out and ready to go, with a few special treats ordered for the night!"

☁ Your excitement is palpable and contagious, so much so Astro has to tighten his hold on his own tail, even if the moon at the end continues to move regardless. "That sounds perfect." He gives a sappy grin. "Other than that, myself and Shelly started a new book Brightney recommended to us, so we've been doing that to reconnect. And I think...that's really it from my end."

☁ You soften at the new information, leaning on one of your hands as your elbow settles on the table. "You sound happy."

☁ "I am. Immensely." He returns, reaching a hand. You give your free one eagerly, letting him hold it and trace his thumb over the knuckles of your hand. "Now, what about you? You've been busy."

☁ You nod, watching his thumb before thinking back to what you've been doing lately. "Well, Cosmo and I have started getting into art lately. We spent last night painting with music in the background, and it was nice. We got to talk without really thinking about it-oh, by the way, we decided you would be the boot in monopoly."

☁"...The boot." He has to take a second, mentally going through the pieces before realizing he never cared enough to know them all.

☁ "Yeah, we originally thought thimble because it sounds like thumb and you have the most thumbs, but it was way funnier if you went with the boot." You explain as if any of that made any sense whatsoever. "Also, did you know he wants like eight kids? Not happening." You scrunch your features before shaking his head. "Like, don't get me wrong, I liked the kids when Gardenview was in it's prime, but eight? All the time?!" You grimace, making him chuckle before your shaking your head.

☁ "Anyway, Sprout and I, what have we been doing?" You think for a second, before perking right up. "A few things! We've been playing games a lot! It started with Mario Kart, and then we found mini-gold clubs on one of the runs and now we set up increasingly difficult holes. It's great! I kick his ass!" You beam. Astro's sure half the problem for Sprout is that the mini-golf clubs made for children are much too short for him, but he doesn't bring that up.

☁ "And with friends, Goob's going through something- which I'll tell you in a second-, but Glisten and I have gotten closer lately. He joined our tag runs recently and he actually kills it! Especially with his teleporting? I don't think he's been tagged once." You explain, raising your head so you could use that hand to gesture as you speak. "We're thinking of doing some sort of Geo-caching too, but it's hard because we can't really leave Gardenview. That's okay though. As for now, I'm here with you, moonshine."

☁ His cheeks dust navy at the compliment, squeezing your hand tighter. "Do you remember the first time we did this?"

☁ You hum, thinking back before nodding. "I think I do. It was before we started dating. I think I remember being pissy because people kept saying Cosmo and I were dating but we weren't. But it wasn't because people were saying it, but because I had a huge stinkin' crush on him at the time and he could not pick up the hint."

☁ He chuckles. "Yeah. I was a little relieved at that you know. I had a 'huge stinkin' crush' on this cute distractor that had come to visit me. Imagine how crushed i would've been." He teases and you stick your tongue out. "Please. You were just as bad. I was doing the same goofy moves to you and Sprout literally within the same week and you didn't pick up on it either."

☁ "Neither of you picked up on anything, don't you fool yourselves." A new voice startles you both, making you look over at the doorway. Sprout is there, raising a brow at you both. Cosmo is hanging off his side, looking like he's seconds away from collapsing, eyes bleary and slowly blinking. Both of you wave at them, even if Sprout's eyes dart to the cookie jar and he gives an exasperated groan. "Again?"

☁ "In our defense, most of this batch were eaten by Goob. He's going through some stuff." You wince, watching as Astro pulls a chair to his side with his foot, close enough they make a soft clink when they hit, opening his blanket the duo. Cosmo takes the invitation, slumping forward as he practically crawls on the chair and burrows into the celestial, who wraps his arms around the cake roll, covering him in his cloak-blanket. At this point, you aren't even sure which it is.

☁ Sprout raises a brow at you, grabbing an apron off the hook and quickly slipping it on as he steps towards the cabinets. "What do you mean? Goob is the last person I'd expect."

☁ "Me too!" You exclaim, gently easing your hand from Astro's so you can turn to the side, making talking to both Sprout and Astro (and Cosmo by extension) easier. "But- Pause. Rewind. What do you know of the Teagan and Rodger drama? I know Astro is caught up because I told him and Cosmo knows because he's been here since it started, but I don't know if any of us have caught you or the other mains up."

☁ "Not much." Sprout responds, pulling out the butter and sugar in practiced motions as you bite into your cookie, nodding as if this was the answer you expected. "What kind of cookies do we want this time?"

☁ "Double chocolate. There's a new cocoa powder-" Cosmo suddenly pipes up, even if his eyes stay shut, interrupting himself with a yawn. "That I ordered specifically for that recipe we were looking at."

☁ Sprout nods at this, preheating the oven as he passes to grab the larger electric mixer. He measures out the butter and two types of sugar before letting them mix, going back to the pantry for the powdered ingredients. "Okay, so what is the reason? Like I know obviously the other day in the elevator there was a nerve hit."

☁ "Yeah," You dip a piece of your broken cookie in your glass of milk. "So I'll start from the beginning. When we first recovered Teagan, her and Rodger were like...inseparable. I mean, they had Toodles, so like we kinda assumed they'd be. Toodles was ecstatic to have them both back too, so we were all like 'great, perfect.' It was not in fact great or perfect." You throw the piece into your mouth as Sprout sifted said cocoa powder, flour and a few other things into a separate bowl.

☁ "It was fine for the first little bit and then we started recovering more and more people, then they began fighting, like a lot. Like more than I would classify as normal for...any couple really. It was silly, small, petty things too like Rodger didn't say good morning to her first." You continued. "He normally said good morning to Toodles first, but he was far from perfect either. I remember once, he like lost his shit because she picked up a research capsule."

☁ "He called her all sorts of names, didn't he?" Cosmo piped in, poking open an eye. You nodded at this. "I wasn't convinced they weren't gonna get physical that run. They were so loud I had to work double time to keep the twisteds occupied as Cosmo had to do twice as many machines."

☁ This made both Sprout and Astro grimace, the latter rubbing the cake roll's shoulder in sympathy even if this was long in the past.

☁ You're thinking momentarily, trying to decipher when it truly turned to shit when it hits you. "It was when Glisten came back that they broke up. Rodger made it this whole thing too in the middle of the run. I don't really blame Glisten as he was unaware of Toodles like...being their kid, we hadn't had the chance to fill him in. He was spending a lot of time with Rodger though, so we just expected him to fill Glisten in. Turns out, he didn't. In retaliation, Teagan started seeing Shrimpo."

☁ Sprout is gaping behind you as he pauses where he's adding an egg to the mixer. He recovers quickly, throwing out the shell before adding vanilla to the mix as well. He turns down the mixing speed before turning to you. "Shimpo? And Teagan?"

☁ You nod, watching Cosmo take one of Astro's cookies, making the Celestial huff at this even if his newly freed tail wags behind him. You grin before turning back to Sprout. "Yeah, trust, we weren't expecting it either. They were also about as explosive as you'd expect. If Teagan and Shrimpo weren't fighting, it was him and Rodger or her and Rodger or all three of them depending on the day. At this point, Glisten was aware he was in a little too deep, but he had fallen hard and fast and didn't know what to do."

☁ "What did he do? I can't expect him to do much in that situation." Astro pipes in, mindlessly handing Cosmo his glass- which the cake roll was reaching for. "And what happened to Toodles?"

☁ "That's what Glisten did." Cosmo steps in, dipping his stolen treat. "He would take Toodles the second this started up and would come to either mine or Y/N's room. His was still being put together and if nothing else, he knew he could trust us to step in if they tried bringing the fight to him. Which they did. It seemed if they were fighting, everyone needed to fight."

☁ "You're joking." Sprout spits, putting down the bowl with the flour mixture he was adding to the mixer. "That's so ridiculous."

☁ "I wish we were." You shrug. "But no. Which is kind of why they hate our relationship so much because we don't fight, and our arguments are often just a matter of temporary disagreement then true hostility." Your tail gives a whip behind you. "It only got physical during this period once. Once was all that was needed though. Shrimpo and Rodger had gotten into it with Teagan instigating, like pouring gas on an electric fire, and Shrimpo snapped, throwing a fist. Toodles saw and Glisten stepped in then while Scraps took Toodles. He was already on the brink, but they didn't break up during that."

☁ "How did they break up?" Sprout asks, now thoroughly entwined in this story. "They aren't together now, as far as I'm aware." He turns back to adding the powdered ingredients and you let him finish before answering.

☁ "Shrimpo and Glisten walked in on Rodger and Teagan." You explain and the bowl is nearly dropped in time with Sprout's jaw. Astro hums at this, having a similar expression when he first heard it. You nod before continuing. "They broke up with them then and there. They didn't take it well and it was this huge thing once more. Runs were absolute agony for the a little while. Glisten, in his defense, absolutely refused to interact with them though. Refused to look at them, talk to them, and I'm pretty sure for a while refused to do runs with them."

☁ The mixer is stopped and scraped as a few cookies sheets are pulled out and prepped, Sprout moving to roll the dough balls out, adding chocolate chips as he does. "When was all this?"

☁ "Right before we got Astro back was when the peak hit. It slowly got better when we got you back, and it's remained a little stagnant. Until recently." You give a devious smirk, knowing all three are hooked onto the information you're about to share. "Let me preface this with saying, everything I tell you I have permission to do so. Goob knows I'm doing this-"

☁ "Goob's involved?!" Cosmo whines, now looking wide awake.

☁ "Not in the way you think!" You quickly remedy. "No, he's involved in a different way. Because him and I work really well together, we do a lot of runs together, which duh, you guys know, but Glisten has wanted to get away from...you know...So he's started hanging with us a lot more. Anyway, they do their own thing, we do ours, but Goob came up to me the other day, and you wanna know what he said?"

☁ "Is that even a question?" Astro snorts. "What do you get from teasing us like this?"

☁ "Satisfaction, especially when I tell you that Goob has a big ol' stinkin' crush on GLISTEN." You share, and all three gape at the new piece of information. "Scraps won't have it, she's literally fuming because, and I quote, why would he want to get involve in all that drama. Goob literally refused to let her say anything about it further, going to war. I had never seen Goob so upset with his sister before."

☁ "Was this during that run we did a couple days ago? The one where tripped over a can of pop and smoked his face against a machine?" Cosmo eagerly asks, sitting up with his hands slamming on the table. "And Glisten was the first to run over and oh my god-?!"

☁ You nod excitedly. "It was! Goob literally has not stopped talking about it since. He even asked how we got together."

☁ "And you had to tell him all about how I was the one to do it?" Sprout smirked, sliding the first batch into the over. You excitement paused as you turned to stare at him, scoffing in his direction. "It was a group effort."

☁ "Nope. All me. Sprout is the greatest. C'mon. Admit it." His spotted cheeks upturn in time with his catlike grin and you continue to scoff.

☁ "Over my dead body maybe." You cross your arms, turning away from him as he comes up behind you. His arms wrap around your shoulders anyway as he nuzzles into your cheek, blowing a raspberry against it and making you squirm against him. You let out a yell at the action, even if he tightens his hold so you can't get out.

☁ The other two simply watch, remaining ignorant to your cries at them for help.

☁ While this has started as just something between you and Astro, watching you and Sprout, with Cosmo returning to burrow in his side, Astro lets his tail wag this time. His heart practically bursts at the full feeling it has and how lucky he considers himself to be a part of this.

☁ You and him will have more date nights, just the two of you, but these moments with all four of you have a way of just making him feel so special.

☁ Almost to the point he feels bad for the others as he knows they'll never feel the same happiness he feels with you guys.

☁ He hopes the past version of himself can rest easy now, knowing he's happy and content, and wouldn't change it for the world.

Also: The Cookie Recipe Sprout is making -> Here!

[f1-stuff]

hello mal. would you share your favourite charlos moments as teammates? i would love to know what you really think is the best

Hello! I was putting this off bc it was causing me much distress just thinking about which moments I would choose, but here we are! You didn't specify how many so I narrowed it down to my all-time top 10, with a few honorable mentions.

You did specify 'as teammates', so I'm gonna leave out the infamous singapore 2018 pool, tho it is an all-time charlos moment to be sure... The order is honestly kind of random because I found it really hard to rank them (don't ask a mother to choose her favorite child!)

10. Cookie decorating!! (2022) - I love this video so much (which is why I made a whole charlos flirting video essay about it). It's just chock-full of classic ways the two of them interact and joke around (Charles trying to blindfold Carlos for him, constantly trying to steal things out of his hands, both whistling/humming the same song at different points, touching constantly...). And why were they sitting like this?? (we know why) Anyway, I don't think we talk about it enough.

9. Monza Ferrari battle (2023) - I simultaneously love and hate this moment asfghdka which is maybe why it's down so low on the list. It's the most adrenaline and anxiety I've ever had watching F1 (I was literally running circles around my living room, yelling at the TV). But I think it also just exemplifies how competitive the two of them are, how hard they race each other without crashing. Like, their rivalry is core characterization for them, therefore it had to be on the list!!

(their tyres are literally kissing) ((this was foreplay for them))

8. Bahrain 1-2 (2022) - A classic!! Their first double podium and 1-2 as teammates! Their hug in parc ferme!! Carlos trying to pour wine into Charles' mouth on the podium!!! They were so giddy and happy, and it felt like the start of an incredible year...(we all know how it really turned out 🥴) This could maybe be higher on the list, but it feels so long ago now that I think I'd need to rewatch the race to draw back up those emotions again.

7. 'Lord Perceval' is coined (2021) - This whole moment is so cute, and it became pretty iconic since the team would go on to use the nickname a lot, and it spread throughout the fandom. It's sort of funny bc they were clearly joking around, but it caught on. They became the Smooth Operator and Lord Perceval, and I think that's beautiful.

6. Monaco hug (2024) - It was actually harder than I thought to choose between this one and the Monza '24 one. They both feature Carlos being super happy for a Charles win, his patented charles hair grab, as well as charlos cradling each other heart-to-heart, cheek-to-cheek. ❤️ I went with Monaco bc it came first in the year so had a greater impact on me, and bc Charles finally broke the Monaco curse.

5. Carlos' birthday surprise (2022) - Set the standard for Charlos birthday shenanigans. Charles complaining about his legs cramping in the cupboard LOL. I just love how happy Carlos looked in all those clips... Also, they were on their honeymoon that weekend or something, because there was also the 'I know you very well' hilarious lissie mackintosh vid and the 'you're doing great love'.

4. The bracelet video (2023) - Just...iconic. Charles asking Carlos for help with his bracelet and Carlos calling him 'darling,' asking for a kiss afterward. They've never been more married.

3. THE tiktok (2022) - This might be too high on the list tbh, but for the sheer shock value of waking up to it that day and the mania it caused in the charlos community, it's a hard one to beat. 😂

2. C² song challenge in Fiorano (2021) - this one gets the place of honor as #2 bc it's charlos' favorite moment together (along with Bahrain '22). They've both mentioned a few times that they fondly remember that day, and how much they laughed. It's also at the very beginning of their partnership, and it shows how immediately they acted like giddy besties.

1. Chili plushie (2024) - Okay. I guess?? This is my all-time favorite charlos moment??? 🥺 It was my favorite of 2024, so it could be recency bias. But something about it being the start of their bittersweet end...Carlos gifting him the chili...'so you remember me for the rest of your life'...Charles in his denial era...oof. I just really love these two, and this moment made me emotional about their years of friendship, rivalry, and shenanigans soon coming to an end.

This was so hard!!! But alas, I forced myself to narrow it down, and also to try and represent all of the years of their partnership, in different scenarios (racing/non-racing). Obviously, there are so many other amazing moments, so I'll consider it a blessing that we are so spoiled for choice as charlos fans ❤️

Honorable mentions (that I struggled not to include):

Drivers' parade car with swapped names

'Jazz'

Mexico balls grab

Blindfolded sim racing bdsm hair-pulling !!

Train sandwich share

Miami start-stop challenge

'jamon iconico'

Jenga challenge (my first ever f1 gifset!!)

Charles snoozing next to Carlos during football

Goggle games

'Take off your clothes, Carlos'...

There's just so many 😌

[hellsenthero]

You Call Him Daddy

DBF!Joel X Fem!Reader

How were you supposed to know that your much older boyfriend was your dad's best friend?

MASTERLIST

*****

You didn't know who Joel really was when you met him. You hadn't realized that your dad's buddy from work was the same man you were seeing privately.

Joel didn't realize that the girl he was seeing, that he was fucking, was his best friends daughter. He hasn't known that when he joked about how good your mouth is, he was joking about it with your father.

Your poor father hadn't known that he wasn't the only man you called daddy.

But now it was all out in the open.

Both you and Joel lay together in bed, silent save for your heavy breathing. The thin sheet had been kicked down to the end of the bed. The blankets were lost somewhere on the floor. Sweat clung to your body, your face, and your neck. Joel threw an arm across your torso, and you groaned at the sticky heat of him.

"Joel," you grumbled as he tried to pull you into him.

"Come closer," Joel ordered with a mumble. His face was pressed into his pillow, muffling his voice.

"'S too hot, I need to shower."

"Shower later, cuddle now." You laughed at your boyfriend's little pout.

"I hate you," you said as you rolled into his embrace.

"'S not what you were sayin' a few minutes ago, darlin'."

If Joel heard the response you grumbled under your breath, he didn't let on.

The late afternoon sun shone golden rays through Joel's bedroom window. This late in August, you could already see a few red tipped leaves outside, an early sign of autumn's approach. It was pretty, but it was also a reminder to you that Joel's two week long summer vacation was coming to an end.

"Two more days of your vacation left." You said as you turned to look into Joel's dark eyes.

"Fuck, don't remind me."

"I wish you didn't have to go out this afternoon."

"I know, I'm sorry, but I promised my buddy I'd go to his place for a barbecue ages ago." Joel paused, taking the moment to wiggle in closer to your body. "You could always come and meet my friends from work."

"Do you really want to introduce your friends to your much younger girlfriend on such a large scale?"

"If it means showing you off, yeah." Joel answered.

"Well," you said as you trailed a finger up Joel's naked chest. "As much as I love showing off, I think I'd rather do it on a smaller scale."

"You can text me if you change your mind."

"I know," you answered with a quick kiss. "I think I'll visit my parents' place tonight, I'm getting low on toilet paper so I think I'll steal some from them."

Joel's grin was as bright as the sun shining in through his window. "My little thief. I can buy you toilet paper if you need it."

You shook your head. "I know, I could easily buy it myself too. But it's not as fun as stealing it from my parents' supply closet."

"Well," Joel said with a yawn as he stretched. "I'm glad you'll be amusing yourself when I'm out."

"You'll come by my place after your barbecue?" You asked as you slipped out of Joel's embrace.

"Of course, darlin'." Joel answered as you slipped your underwear back on.

"Good." You leaned over Joel and gave him a quick kiss before spinning away to throw the rest of your clothes on.

---

You were surprised to find the gate to your parents backyard wide open.

After leaving Joel, you ran a few errands before driving to your parents' place. You almost thought you had the wrong house when you heard such a commotion coming from the open backyard. Music, laughter and the smell of barbecue accosted you.

Your dad yelled your name as he saw you appear around the corner of the gate.

"Hey there sweetheart," your father greeted.

"Hey," you answered as you gave your dad a quick hug. "What's going on?"

"Your mother and I are throwing a little barbecue get-together with the guys from my work." Alarm bells began ringing in the back of your mind. "I didn't think you'd want to hang around my buddy's much. Otherwise, I would've invited you."

"Oh, that's okay."

"But now you can stay for the meal and I'll introduce you to some of my friends."

Before you could answer, a pair of arms slid around your waist. You knew who they belonged to, and you knew what was coming, but everything happened too fast for you to stop. You were spun around to meet a giddy Joel who was quick to lean down and kiss you.

Right in front of your dad.

"So glad you made it," Joel said as he pulled away from your lips. "How'd you get the address?"

"Joel," you gasped. You looked between your father and Joel with wide eyes.

"Miller," your father spoke with an edge. "Whatcha doin'" He asked all too casually.

"This is be girl I've been tellin' you about." Joel said all to proudly. It wasn't until he finally looked away from you and at your father's fuming gaze that he realized he was missing something.

"You mean to tell me that the girl you've been seeing, the one you've been sleeping with, is my daughter?"

"Dad," you gasped as all the colour drained from Joel's face. "It's, we uh-" you stammered, unsure what you could say that wouldn't make the situation even worse. "We didn't know." You said. Your gaze flit between Joel, your father, and the other party goers, wondering if any of them had clued into the absolute shit show that was happening in the middle of the backyard.

"She's half your age!" Your father hissed at Joel. His hand gesturing between the two of you.

"I know, but listen-"

"Listen?" Your father cried. You could see out of the corner of your vision that a few people were picking up on what was happening now. "You want me to listen to how you seduced my daughter into your bed, Miller? About how my daughter, who's half your fuckin' age, has been fooling around with one of my best buddies from work? Is that it? Is that what you want me to fucking listen to?"

"Listen daddy-" you tried. Both sets of eyes landed on you.

"I got it,"

"Absolutely not!" Joel and your father said at the same time.

"Oh my god," you cried, your hands flew to your face in shame, absolutely mortified. "I'm, I'm going," you said before hastily turning around and rushing from the backyard. Two sets of voices called your name, but you didn't turn around, instead moving faster out of the backyard and towards your car. You could feel the onslot of tears coming. Your vision grew blurry as you yanked your car door open and threw yourself behind the wheel. You blinked back the tears as you grabbed for your seat belt, determined to race out of there and possibly never return. You were stopped from pulling out of the driveway by your passenger side door opening up.

Joel slid into the passenger seat with a great commotion. "Baby," he began as he leaned towards you, hid hand reaching out for your own.

"Stop," You pulled your hand from his reach and grabbed the steering wheel. "I need to leave, Joel. Now!"

"Drive then," he ordered.

You didn't bother arguing with him about leaving his car behind before you pulled out of your parents' driveway.

"I'm fucked," you said about five minutes into your drive home. "Absolutely fucked, Joel!"

"No-"

"Yes!" You cried. As you came to a red light, you took the chance to rub at your eyes like a sleepy infant.

"My dad knows we're together! He knows we're sleeping together!"

"I know," Joel answered calmly.

"He thinks you seduced me!"

"I know."

"Why aren't you upset?" You cried. A few more intersections to drive through, and you'd be turning onto your street.

"I am, but not in the way you are, darlin'."

"What?"

"Just drive," Joel said, pointing to the lights up a head. You were almost home. "We can sit and talk once we get inside, yeah?"

"I don't think I can sit still right now." You answered honestly. "I'm, I'm like buzzing," you explained weakly.

"I'm sure you're anxious and stressed, darling. Look," Joel said as you pulled into your driveway. "Let's get inside,"

You practically raced inside, determined to sort through the days absolute shit show. "He's gonna make us break up," you said as you paced across your living room carpet. "That or my parents are going to disown me."

"They won't-"

"Then they'll make us break up!"

"They can't make us do anything." Joel answered.

"Oh my god," you moaned in utter mortification. "Everyone from your work saw that today! They all heard how you're dating the slut that's your best friends daughter!"

"Hey!" Joel interrupted harshly. "You're not a slut, and it fucking pisses me off that your father would insinuate something like that to you. You're a grown adult," Joel's hands came up to cup your face. "We're in an adult relationship, one where we're both happy and consenting. We haven't done anything wrong."

"I know," you answered. "And it never felt like that before, like what we were doing was wrong. But now, with my dad's reaction," you trailed off. Unsure if you really wanted to voice how your father had you doubting your relationship.

"I know. But do you really want to let others control our relationship?"

"No."

"We can talk to your parents, yeah? Explain that this isn't some fling between us. That we really care for each other."

You paused, taking a moment to look into Joels dark eyes. "Not a fling, huh?" You asked, some of your spark returning.

"Not a fling, darling."

"You really care for me?" You asked as you settled yourself on Joel's lap. His arms circled around your back.

"More than you know." Joel answered. You met in the middle for a kiss, your body going lax in his arms. But just as Joel deepened the kiss, your phone rang out. You turned around to see a call from your dad coming through. You leaned over, picking it up from the coffee table to show Joel. "Let it go," Joel told you. "We can talk to him later."

"Not now?"

"No," Joel answered as he maneuvered you to lay across the couch. "He needs time to cool off. And you, darling," he said with a smirk, his head tilted down so he could press a soft kiss to the side of your neck. "You need a distraction."

You tossed your phone somewhere on the carpet. Moving to your hands underneath Joel's shirt, trailing along the muscles in his back. "Okay," you answered. But Joel gave you a look that you knew all too well, one that had you correcting yourself. "Okay, daddy."

[letstalkaboutfandomsbaby]

╔══•.·.☆.·.♥︎.·.☆.·.•══╗

buff guy

╚══•.·.☆.·.♥︎.·.☆.·.•══╝

ʚ Part 4 ɞ

❥ CW: chubby fem reader x buff guy, fluffy date

❥ A/N: better call me butter bc i am on a roll!! Here's part 4!!

He picks you up again on Saturday, same car, casual clothes.

"You look nice," he says when you open the door.

"Thank you," you reply, staring at his biceps. "Your shirt is really tight." He looks down, then back at you.

"Do you not like it?" You scoff.

"I mean..." You press your lips together, smoothing out your lip gloss. "You're... very buff and very attractive... Anyone would love to stare at you in that shirt."

"You think I'm attractive?" You gulp, holding your purse close.

"I... I thought you knew that. I mean... I'm sure everyone finds you attractive."

"The only one I care about is you."

Your cheeks burn, and he holds his hand out for you.

"Shall we?"

You chose a horror movie, but now that you're halfway through the movie, you're not sure why.

There's quite a lot of suspense in this movie, too much in fact. Every time the main character turns a corner, you tense in your seat. You're so scared you can barely eat your popcorn.

"Are you okay?" he whispers gently, leaning close to you. You nod, but realize he can't see you in the dark.

"Yeah, I'm good. Just wondering when the jumpscares will happen." You hear him chuckle quietly.

And then, right on cue, there's a jumpscare. You jolt, hand reaching out, grabbing something solid to ground yourself. Once the scene is over and you're finally able to breathe, you realize what you're holding onto.

"I-I'm sorry," you whisper, beginning to pull away, but he grabs your hand, keeping it on his bicep.

"It's fine. I'm here." His hand is so big against yours, so warm, safe. It's insane how big his arm is. Is he flexing?

You keep your thoughts to yourself, trying to focus in on the movie, but the heat coming from his body is remarkable. You swallow hard, taking a leap of faith and resting your head against his shoulder. He tenses, but relaxes. You stay like that the rest of the movie.

"That ending was so predictable," you complain as you leave the theater. "I mean, the ghost is destroyed by the forces of good? That's so cheesy."

"You have a lot of opinions about the movie." You slow, looking back at him.

"Sorry, I—"

"Please." He reaches for your hand, squeezing it. "Don't ever apologize for telling me how you feel. I love hearing you talk, even about the things you don't like."

He's rubbing his thumb against the back of your hand. It's so so warm.

"...Okay."

"Would you like to go home?"

You did. You were tired, but you had fun. You liked hanging out with him, even if it was in the quiet dark.

"Did... you want to do anything else?"

"I want to do what you want."

You huff, pouting slightly, which he smiles at. You twist your mouth in thought, before lighting up.

"Oh! There's this Italian ice place closeby that I really like! We could go there..." You pause. "...If you want."

"I would love to." He pulls you closer by your hand, bringing your body towards his. "Show me where it is."

The Italian ice spot is not far from the theater. In fact, you're able to walk there, although your heels are starting to pinch. You ignore it, encouraged by the idea of a sweet treat as you enter the place of business.

There's a line, so the two of you get in it, looking at the menu.

"They have fruity flavors but also milk-based flavors, like cookie dough, and they also have custard you can mix in." You point to the menu. "I like getting the blue raspberry and cotton candy! But it looks like they don't have blue raspberry today."

"Would you like to go somewhere else?" You glance at him.

"What? No, I like this place! I'll just get mango or something." He nods, standing tall again.

"Excuse me." The two of you turn to see a blonde woman standing there, phone clutched in her hand. "I hate to bother you, but you're just so hot! I was wondering if I could have your number."

You feel your heart sink. Of course he would have other women interested in him. This probably happens all the time. Why would you bother trying to get to know him when he could have any woman he wants?

"That's very rude." A strong arm wraps around your shoulders and pulls you towards his side. "I am clearly on a date." The woman flushes and raises her hands.

"Oh! I'm so sorry! I thought you guys were siblings." His face turns sour.

"Siblings? That's ridiculous. We look nothing alike. Do you need glasses?" She blushes darker and takes a step back.

"I-I'm sorry. My mistake. I'll leave you two be." She shrinks away to her other friends who are now glaring at the two of you. You want to disappear.

"You didn't have to be so rude," you whisper to Guy, and he grunts.

"I wasn't being rude. I was being honest. She needs to learn to mind her business."

You hum in thought, looking back at the menu. His arm doesn't leave your shoulders until you step forward to order.

"This is very good," he remarks as he stuffs spoonfuls of Italian ice into his mouth. Of course someone of his stature would get the Italian ice and custard in the largest size available.

"I'm glad you like it," you reply, taking dainty bites of your fruity ice. "This is my favorite sweet spot. It's more popular in the summer, but there's always something nice about a sweet frozen treat during the cold weather!"

He smiles, licking cream off his lips. You swallow at the action, clearing your throat and focusing on your dessert.

"So, um... what are your hobbies? I know you go to the gym but do you do anything else?" He shrugs.

"Not really. If I'm not doing my job or working out, I don't do much."

"Oh..." You pick at your dessert. "Don't you get bored?" He shrugs again.

"Sometimes. When I get bored at work or home, I usually come to see you."

You feel your cheeks warm up, but you try to hold your ground.

"Oh, so you only think of me when you're bored, huh?" His eyes go wide, but he relaxes when he sees you grin.

"You're fucking with me."

"Mm-hm!" you say with a nod, giggling. He shakes his head, but he's smiling.

"No. I think about you all the time, actually." You feel yourself melting like your Italian ice, but you try to stay strong.

"You must get tired thinking of me."

"Quite the contrary." He scoops up the last of his dessert, shoveling it into his mouth. "You're the most interesting person I've ever met."

"You barely know me."

"I know." He puts down his empty cup, staring at you. "That's why I'm trying to change that."

You bite your lip, taking a deep breath. You stare at the last third of your dessert.

"I don't want anymore."

"Do you want to take it home?"

"No, it'll melt and won't be good anymore... but I don't want to just waste it."

He holds out his hand, which you stare at before you slide your dessert over to him. He takes it from you, tipping the cup back and drinking the rest of the slush in your cup. You watch his Adam's apple bob in his throat, amazed at how it moves. He puts the cup down once he's done, giving you a thumbs up, which makes you smile.

"Thank you."

"No problem. I'll always be here to eat your leftovers."

You giggle at that, standing up.

"Alright, I'm ready to go home now."

You discard your trash and take about ten steps out of the Italian ice place before you have to stop. Guy slows beside you.

"What's wrong?"

"I'm sorry, I—" Your face twists in pain. "My heels really hurt."

"Oh..." He clenches his fists before unclenching them. "Here. Let me carry you to the car."

"Wha—"

Before you can ask what he's talking about, he's leaning down, arms outstretched as he picks you up bridal style, lifting you to his chest. He starts walking away.

"OH MY GOD! PUT ME DOWN!"

"Don't wiggle. I'll drop you."

"PUT ME ON THE GROUND RIGHT NOW OR I'LL SCREAM!"

"You're already screaming."

"PUT ME DOWN!!"

He stops at a bench, leaning down and resting you on it. You take heavy breathes, lightly slapping his arm.

"You can't just pick up a girl like that! You need to ask for permission!"

"I'm sorry."

The two of you rest in silence as you catch your breath, hand on your chest. He sighs, squatting down so that he's closer to eye level with you.

"Stay here. I'm going to go get the car and bring it to you."

"That sounds like a much better idea than carrying me to your car."

"I'm sorry." He puts his hand on your knee. "I'll be back. Don't move."

"I won't," you say as he stands, giving you one last look before he walks away swiftly.

You lean back on the bench and stare at the sky, taking deep breaths.

He picked you up. He picked you up and carried you, and he didn't complain about your weight or act like it was even hard. No one has ever picked you up like that before. Is he really that strong? He doesn't even seem real—

"Excuse me? Ma'am?" You blink, escaping your thoughts and looking at the young man who was now in front of you. "I'm sorry to bother you, but do you know the direction to the movie theater?"

"Oh! Yeah, of course."

You start explaining the route, the directions he would need to take, but he wasn't really getting it.

"Wait, so which street do I take a left?"

You sigh, explaining again, this time slower as Guy's car pulls up in front of you. You're still explaining as he gets out, approaches the two of you and aggressively grabs the young man's shoulder.

"She's taken," he grunts between gritted teeth. The young man looks up at him, frightened, starting to shake.

"I-I-I just wanted to know where the m-movie theater was." Guy blinks, his expression relaxing as he lets go of the young man.

"Oh. Sorry."

The young man scurries away from the two of you before you can finish giving directions. You look up at Guy, arching your brow.

"So I'm taken now?" He swallows, looking down at the ground.

"Only if you want to be."

You sigh, shaking your head as you stand.

"Alright, big boy. Take me home."

The drive home is silent, and Guy has a death grip on the wheel. You don't comment on it, instead looking out your window and watching the world go by. He pulls up to your apartment, opening your door for you as usual. He leans down with his arms outstretched, but you raise your hand.

"Do not carry me." He pulls back, letting you stand up on your own, closing the door behind you. He follows you up the steps, pausing when you turn around at the door.

"Before you go in," he starts, fists clenching, "I would like to apologize for a few things today."

"What?"

"I would like to apologize for carrying you without permission. That was very rude of me. I would also like to apologize for saying that you were taken. That's not my decision to make. I didn't mean to make you uncomfortable."

You sigh, crossing your arms and leaning on one leg.

"You're a little rough around the edges, huh?" He twists his mouth, unable to look at you. You sigh again. "You're lucky you're cute, or else I'd be super pissed." He swallows, looking up at you.

"You think I'm cute?" You shrug.

"Yeah, in a rugged, scary kind of way. Like a pitbull that wears pajamas." He smiles softly at that, and it reaches his eyes.

"Thank you. That's the best compliment I've ever gotten." You laugh at that, throwing your head back. You calm yourself down, smiling at him.

"You're really something, huh, Guy?" He shrugs, still smiling at you. He suddenly frowns, glancing at the ground.

"I have to tell you something." Your heart sinks.

"W-What?"

"I have to go on a business trip this coming week. I'm leaving Sunday night."

"Oh! Oh, okay," you reply, relieved that it wasn't anything bad.

"But I should be back on Friday evening, if everything goes well." You nod.

"Got it. Thank you for telling me." He stares at you, shifting on his feet.

"Can I text you while I'm gone?" You think about it, then nod. He seems to light up at that. "Can I call you at night?" You shrug.

"Sure, if you want to."

"I would love to."

You rub your arms, thinking. You take a step closer, motioning him towards you. He tilts his head a bit, leaning closer. You lean in with little thought, pressing a chaste kiss against his cheek. It's light, barely there, but it was still something. You pull away, and Guy is staring off into the distance, like a deer caught in headlights.

"Are... you okay?"

"I..." He clears his throat. "I gotta go."

"Oh! Okay."

He spins on his heel, taking a few steps down before stopping, turning back and returning up the stairs. He grabs your hand gently, placing a kiss on the back of it before giving a swift 'goodnight' and going down the steps again. He practically races into his car, and once it's on, he speeds off. You watch his car leave, furrowing your brow.

"What a weirdo..."

[heavysighing-dreamyeyes]

craziest thought: what if arkham knight and redhood are twins?

RH is Jason the older twin, AK is Jayce the younger twin

They both were adopted by Bruce and became Robin and Redstart respectively, Batman's Wonder Twins. The twins met Reader in Gotham Academy, saving them from a bunch of guys asking for your number. From there, the three became a tight knit group.

Then, disaster struck when Robin and Redstart had to seperate for a while because of different missions. Jason stayed in Gotham, Jayce went to a different country.

Jason found a lead about his mother and track it down only to get captured by the Joker.

When Jayce came back, it was to a home with a dead twin. Filled with anger, he tries to get revenge only to be stopped by Batman. Tensions were high, Jayce became even more angry and frustrated at his family. The only good thing in his life now was you, but your presence was not enough to calm his rage. Maybe in another world, if you tried harder, you could prevent Jayce from taking the path of revenge but this world is not that world.

Just like his twin, Jayce got caught by the Joker and went through hell.

"Two birds in one stone! Or should I say crowbar?" Joker laughs, a bloody crowbar in his hand.

Batman's spirit has never been as crushed as this moment, watching the video Joker sent to him of Jayce being tortured with the same crowbar that killed Jason.

You became a ahadow of yourself. Two of your best friends died one after the other. All the naive hope and determination left in you died like a little candle light after hearing about Jayce's death.

End Scene.

i'm fasting right now so all sorts of ideas are cooking in my brain. honestly i just want to see RH and AK duking it out for you but then this happened lol anyways thank you and congrats on your followers milestone!!

ooooooooooohhhhhh, OW! Ugh, this AU is just– wow– I'm so invested. There's so much angst potential here and the way this brain worm has not left my head since you dropped this in my inbox!

Just– you went from having the world, two best friends that you would do anything for (and they would do the same for you) and now you're left with nothing but twin gravestones?? Frothing at the mouth and unwell.

It's almost worse when they do come back, because neither of them are the same. Of course they have similar goals, a desire for revenge, but they aren't the boys you spent every single second of your day with. You think they would work together, but they're angry at everybody, angry at each other, and I would even say they're angry at you.

Jason is angry nothing changed when he died, he's angry that you didn't do enough to save his brother. But he's also angry at AK for leaving you behind, for falling for the same trap he did.

AK is angry that you didn't find him– that no one found him. He blames everyone for not being enough to help when he was mourning his brother. And he's so angry that his older brother– the one who got the mantle of Robin– let himself get killed.

But anger doesn't change the fact that you're still you. You were (are?) their best friend, and that starts to twist you into some sort of prize. If they can get you on their side, doesn't that prove that they're in the right? It's a mockery of how they used to argue over your opinions as children. But none of you are kids anymore, and now there's a war with too many sides in Gotham that you're stuck in the middle of.

And you hate that they expect you to choose, you're angry too. You don't want to choose– wouldn't want to even if they were the same as they were before. Even if you could choose, your options are between a crime lord and the head of a militia, and who knows what would happen to you if you gave into either of them.

But don't get it wrong, you want to help them, you miss them more than anything. And there's really only a handful of people who understand that, so if you go running to Wayne Manor in hopes of finding a better way, well, let's just say it never crossed your mind how that would affect them.

[entitled-fangirl]

Dumb football game.

Jason Todd x reader

Summary: it's the little moments with Jason Todd that make it worthwhile

Masterlist

....................................................................

"Stop doing that."

Even from across the apartment, he could tell when she bit her fingernails. She reluctantly pulled her hand from her mouth and set it in her lap. Her eyes still stayed on the chewed nail.

Jason emerged from the kitchen with two bowls of spaghetti in his hand. Was the sauce from a can? Yes. But did that take away from the fact that he can make spaghetti? Never. As he sat down, the couch cushion caved in, making her grab the armrest like usual. He was a large man, after all. And every time he sat down, she all but tumbled into him from the sinking into their soft couch.

"Game on yet?" He asked gently as he handed one of the bowls off. 

The two had bonded over college football. It was dumb. Completely dumb. Neither went to college, nor did they really know all that much about football. But they loved choosing opposite teams every game and making a bet out of it.

She hummed out questioningly and picked up the remote, finding the channel quickly. They had barely missed kickoff. She muted the commentators quickly- the two were always easily overstimulated by the loud voices.

Jason made himself comfortable. His feet rested on the coffee table. He pulled her legs up, forcing her to lay against the armrest and used her legs as a table. She did minimal complaining.

"Blue team wins and I'll do the dishes," Jason remarked passingly.

She sat up. "What if I also think the blue team is gonna win?"

He took a messy bite of his food before giving her a 'seriously' look. "You don't," he spoke through the food pushed into the inside of his cheek. "You always pick the purple teams."

"No, I-" Damn it. "Well, I like the blue team's mascot better."

He chewed and swallowed. "Really?" He asked, not believing her for a second.

"Yeah. Yeah. I want to bet on the blue team this time."

He shrugged. "Alright. I liked the purple team anyway."

They shook on it like always and quieted down to eat and watch the game. She quickly realized that she'd made the wrong choice.

She hated the blue team. Their uniforms were lame and the mascot only stood there. He didn't do anything cool. She opened her mouth-

"No," Jason muttered with a hint of a smirk. Even through his peripherals, he saw her slouch further against the sofa. 

What would be odd silence for a normal couple was absolute domestic bliss for the two- just the occasional rustling of adjusting or the cheer as a side scored. And, of course, when the heater kicked in.

Three quarters and two empty bowls later, Jason sat at the edge of his seat. He gently rubbed her ankle at every play.

They were tied half way through the last quarter. 

"I wanna raise the stakes," he murmured.

"No," she teased back and hid her face in the pillow. 

"Why not?" He laughed, tugging her ankle and pulling her down towards him. "You don't want to lose?"

She giggled as she was tugged towards him. She loosely kicked at him, to which he restrained her legs with ease.

"C'mere, pretty girl." He pulled her up towards him and manhandled her until she was sitting on his lap, her back against his chest. He wrapped his arms around her, keeping her in place. "What's the matter? Don't want me to win?"

"You practically took my team," she complained. 

"So whiny when you lose."

"Haven't lost yet."

"Right," he smirked. "Yet."

The two continued to watch until she was the one to break the silence. "Dishes. And you have to skip your workout to go shopping with me."

"And if my team wins?"

She shrugged. "Won't happen."

"Okay, princess. If you say so."

…

Final two minutes of the fourth quarter. Jason's team is leading, but the blue team is fourth & goal with 15 seconds on the clock.

Normally, the two wouldn't be so involved in this- but with the higher stakes (Jason only said he'd get a 'favor' from her if his team won), they were on edge.

"My quarterback is just better than yours," she taunted.

"Baby, he's not."

"Well, his name is better."

"You're not wrong about that part."

The ball is passed. They hold their breath.

Caught in the end zone.

"YES!" She brakes the tension, crawling out of his lap with the widest grin on her face. She picks up the bowls off the table and pushes them into his chest teasingly. "Dishes don't do themselves."

"Calm down. There's a flag on the play. Think they're reviewing it."

Shit. She turned, seeing the referee on the field, announcing the play- but with it on mute, they just stared.

Then the points were taken away.

"No. Nah uh. That's not fair. They got the ball-"

Jason laid back with a smirk. "'S not how it works… I think." He holds the bowls out to her. "But like you said. Dishes."

She lets out a dramatic huff and takes the bowls to the kitchen.

"Love you!" He calls back to her with a wide grin.

"Fuck you, Todd!"

His voice lowered. "Yeah, you'd like that."

He'd googled the rivalry before the game.

The blue team never wins.

…

The next day, Jason drug her down the street from their apartment. To a nail salon.

"What is this?" She hesitatingly asked.

He shrugged. "My favor. From winning yesterday. I get to pick the color."

"Jason, I never get my nails done."

"I know. That's the favor. So you knock off.." He gestured widely at her hands, "…the biting stuff. I'm paying."

Her lips quirked up. "You're a softie, Todd."

"Don't let Bruce know."

...........................................................................

[sugarcubeindulgent]

HEYAAA

js wanted to A. request and B. say that YOURE AN ABSOLUTE MACHINEEE (lovingly) thank you for feeding us sm 🫡 anyway pls pls head-canons on each of the club member's ideal type n some sprinkles on things that secretly make them fold pretty pleaaseee

the club members types & what makes them fold.

⊹ ࣪ ˖ contents. suggestive content. fluff?

a/n: thank you so much! and thank you for the request, anon! i hope you enjoy! these are all MY headcanons, please don't find offense or anything of the sort.

bill dickey's ideal type would be softer women. he'd prefer a softer face and big doe-ish eyes with soft lips and softer hands. i think bill would be into fat women but only because he believes they're all insecure and that they'd be easiest to manipulate. anyways ; style-wise i think his ideal type would be a girl who dresses hyper-feminine. whether it be the trashy y2k bling look or the soft coquette, if it exudes femininity that's ideal for him. he'd want his partner to not wear perfumes or anything scented. he really loves the natural scent of people. personality wise i think bill would like mean people. not mean to him, no he's too sensitive for that. but just the most hater, miserable people like him. his ideal type in personality would be a "what should i tell him next?" "tell him to go kill himself!" "oh yes!" dynamic.

as for what would make bill fold...sex. yeah. pull up your shirt, your skirt, make a dirty hand gesture and anything and everything on his mind will fly out of the window. though that wouldn't be much of a secret. a more secret thing that makes bill fold constantly would be you simply smiling at him in search of approval.

josh levy's ideal type would be older but shorter women. physically i'd like to think he loves nice smiles and big, textured/curly hair. round asses, yeah. as for style, i think josh would really love it when a woman dresses boyish and or masculine-oriented. cargo shorts, baggy clothes, boxers - just think of a masc or butch, that'd be his ideal type fashion and style wise. as for personality he'd want someone kind and soft-spoken. so loud and volatile i think a part of him is as scared of kindness from women as he much as he craves it. he'd want a kind and sweet type because it's the opposite of him. think of an older, unapproachable girl who's really a total sweetheart and very kind. that's his ideal type.

he'd fold at anything. no, i'm not kidding. but bonus points if you touch his face or hands when trying to get him to fold, it'll make him a puddle.

pete dinunzio's ideal type would be anyone with a nice rack. i genuinely do not think he'd give a fuck about anything except how nice someone's tits are. has a thing for crooked teeth though, gaps, snaggle teeth, overbites, etcetc don't ask me why, no clue. fashion-wise i think he'd like any trashy or maximalist look. the more he has to take off of you the better. scene kids, trad goths, gyaru's, tanned bimbos, emos, etcetc. personality wise his ideal type with be someone who hates all men. it's an insecurity thing, he wants to be special by being the only man you can tolerate. definitely would want some really smart and intelligent, as in smarter than anyone's he's met. surprisingly, i don't think he's a big fan of piercings or tattoos. reasoning for that is mine to headcanon and mine alone.

he'd also fold under any attempt of sex. the tried and true thing is nasty, freaky, dangerous sex to make him do whatever you want and or to win any argument.

jerry stokes's ideal type would be funny and uniquely attractive women. he'd like aquiline noses, broad noses, freckled faces, scarred skin, if something is rare or "atypical" he'd love it. i think he has a big thing for dyed or funky hair in any capacity, favors blue hair out of every other color. i don't think he even necessarily has an ideal type, just things he'd prefer to see when looking at his partner. now, style-wise - alternative, we know this. but he wouldn't want outlandish or messy fashion to view. grunge, romantic goth, unlabelled - his ideal type wouldn't be someone it'd be difficult to hug or spontaneously undress if that makes it easier to envision. personality wise, jerry's ideal type would just be someone intelligent and funny. he wants to laugh, he'd want to laugh and also be able to engage with you in what he wants.

jerry would fold with anything. end of story!

[tumblingxelian]

I really hate how much disrespect Salem gets in the FNDM.

Villains like Loki chuck cosmic temper tantrums cos their dad didn't quite love them enough and ooh so deep, so tragic!

But Salem a victim of relentless abuse and isolation loses the only person she was close to becomes, heaven forbids 'upset' that the being who can and at several points do snap their fingers and being him back. Opt not to because of either A, entirely arbitrary rules they just made up, or B, spite, she is somehow already a violent attacker or a "Brat".

Then they torture and punish her, essentially trapping her once again with no escape and she lashes out. Oh how bratty, how childish, how spoiled the people say! While acting as though Ironwood is comparatively tragic and deep and actually gave a shit while Salem being horrified & enraged at the death of humanity is "Fake" or whatever.

Then she spends potentially millions of years in isolation and doesn't really seem to bother anybody until Oz shows up and brings a job with him. Also evidence again that the gods can but chose not to bring him back because they are assholes. & thanks to one vague conversation where-in she could just as easily have been talking about being more than the Brothers people assume "She wants to turn her children into incest broodmares!" Despite all signals indicating that she cared about them long before she knew they could do magic and still mourns them after the fact.

& so on and so forth…

Its just tiring and frankly reeks in no small part of sexism that Salem is presumed as having a cosmic tempter tantrum when we already have an over emotional temper tantrum throwing egomaniac & his name is fucking Watts!

I just fucking hate how Salem is not afforded any nuance, respect or gravitas by so much of the FNDM. You don't have to like Salem, but I HATE that she gets such worse treatment than male villains who are infinitely more petty, puerile and pathetic than she could ever be.

[infinity-or-oblivion]

heyyyy realm nation I have an au for y'all: arranged marriage foolhalo. now hear me out I'm thinking longgggg history of conflict between warring kingdoms (think montagues and capulets) I'm thinking fundamental moral differences that make peace nearly impossible I'm thinking innocent people caught in the crossfire and most of all I'm thinking doomed yaoi. foolish and bad hate each others guts so intensely and somehow have so much in common and I just think forced 'romance' is so fun. anyways foolish is the eldest prince of his family which includes ros and owen and clown and tango and perhaps sneeg and phil and then bad wants to strengthen their kingdoms alliance so he marries foolish except they HATE each others guts and bad’s kingdom/family of pili and pangi and hannah and baghera all keep attacking foolish and his family

okay so that was my initial idea and then I started thinking about the kingdom of fools found family dynamic (because I watch almost exclusively ros pov btw) so here's my pitch: eldest prince foolish and his siblings are Owen, clown, and ros. that’s all i really want tbh BECAUSE LIKE THE DYNAMICS ARE SO GOOD I WANT SOME FAMILY CONFLICT THAT IS ULTIMATELY ROOTED IN LOVE IS THAT SO MUCH TO ASK FOR

so like: middle child that often feels slighted owen, sometimes feels threatened by more talented clown, foolish who cares about all of them so much but he’s stretched thin and can’t do everything himself, and of course. clown and ros my beloveds, baby of the family ros, and all of her brothers love her and feel very protective of her. but sometimes she feels like she doesn’t add as much to the kingdom since she’s more of an artist than a fighter, and also others see her as a weak point, and sometimes she doesn’t get the support and validation she needs from her brothers (except clown??) and of course then there’s clown. he’s got weird eldritch shit going on, something about messing with the magical and ethereal that he becomes intertwined with it, also some ctechno-esque feelings about only being seen as a weapon/tool for others, ANYWAYS I love tr!clown wish he would FUCKING STREAM MORE. rotating them all in my mind like a rotisserie chicken

but like ive been thinking about that time foolish and ros went on a fishing trip after foolish came back from the dead and how good that was and I'm also thinking about the low-key jealous (??) vibe Owen has going on all the time and of course I'm the number one clown and ros fan so yeah. I can't stop thinking about them teehee

and tango is probably a trusted advisor to foolish or something along those lines, as well as sneeg (sneeg and clown divorce canon???? must've been the wind...)

and then on the red/green side there's bad as the king/whatever patriarch, with pangi as his nephew or something like that idk, and then pili is an assassin pangi somehow befriended that hangs around all the time and won’t leave. and also has/had some sort of insane situationship with ros?? also hannah and pac as trusted advisors and the rest of red team as other mercenaries/hired hands (architect sausage, pirate baghera, etc). and let's not forget that pangi and pili have some sort of insane doomed yaoi thing going on too, they truly are the most dysfunctional found family

and with blue, there’s tubbo, cpk, kind of phil and beky and coy and scott (??) and of course aimsey. oh my god tr!aimros is fucking insane, ros is having a Rough Time and foolish is really good at supporting her even though he doesn’t always have time or really get what the hell is going on with ros and aimsey. anyways tubbo is an old friend of foolish, gets along great with ros, and his ex-husband is ‘friends’ with pili. so that’s great. (huge fan of tr!Tommy just kind of being there and annoying tubbo from time to time very in character for him). and tubbo, aimsey and cpk are canonically brothers I don't make the rules, beky is silently recording everything and judging everyone, coy is just trying to build a cool farm and keeps getting pulled into drama

anyways. there's my concept and I keep trying to write something but I can't figure out how the fuck to go about it, so I figured someone else might like the idea. godspeed soldiers

[leons-art-pit]

I feel bad, asking ANOTHER request but.. what about C3 with Tango and Joel? Bonus points if they're trying to blow eachother up with their mind?

I turn into the yippee creature everytime you drop a new piece of art. It's so. Dopamine filled AJSKSK

ITS BEEN TWO WEEKS IM SO SORRY

i went a little insane on this and have been working on it little by little over the past two weeks and im really happy i took my time because i love how it turned out <33

i hope the wait was worth it :D

also the designs and scenario is within an au im still putting together (same world as this one); my favorite dynamic is two characters that don't hate each other as much, but sometimes still make that attempt on the other's life- hence the poisoned ice cream. like, he doesnt exactly want to tango dead all the time, but it would be really funny to see him out of commission for a bit, (un)fortunately it fails

[trippygalaxy]

YOOOOOOO CONGRATS ON 400 FOLLOWERS TRIPPYYYYY 🎉🎉🎉

and for my request, could I request either platonic Legend or Four with a reader who really REALLY wants to be affectionate with their new friend who they got close to quickly, but because of having literally zero experience with physical affection being given from anyone ever (like friends or family rarely ever hugging them that often) they are SO afraid of going about cuddling or even just casual touches 'wrong'

like. reader just wants to cuddle or literally just lean against their friend while the Chain are relaxing at camp but is too shy or embarrassed to ask

(What not being hugged enough as a child does to a mf 😭)

Lessons

OOOO I do love a good platonic fic! Also this is very specfific, i am sending many hugs to you Anon <3

Summary: The Ask Above!

Characters: Legend & GN!Reader (Platonic) Warnings: Legend has a weird way of speaking tbh, reader is touch starved and unsure how to give touch, no romance anywhere Words: 900+

"What's your deal?"

A voice cuts through your anxious thoughts, rough with traces of concern, a voice familiar yet one you dreaded in this moment. Looking up from picking at your nails, you find the veteran staring down at you with furrowed brows and crossed arms.

"Nothing," You grumbled, scooting away from the hero as he unceremoniously plops down beside you.

Though the hero isn't too far from you, his warmth feels miles away and as suffocating as a blanket. You can feel your tendons tense, discomfort of unfamiliarity gnawing at your raised hairs. It was dumb- you're hands twitched, wanting to reach out and at least have a pinky on the pink hero's form but your hands felt like stone, unable to move.

"Don't think it is," The hero grumbles back, watching you from the corner of his eye. "You don't be sulkin by yourself so often, but you've been a hermit all day. Whats up?"

You hated how perspective the hero was. And you hated how he always knew what someone was feeling- most of the chain assumed that the hero, as rough around the edges as he was, wouldn't pay that much attention to group outside of battle. But he did, he wouldn't say anything directly, but you could see how he would always have food on him when Hyrule got more and more tired from overusing his magic, how he almost always had a story to tell Wind when the boy was hanging his head, how he'd herd the boys when he saw Time getting to his limit. The hero of Legend was a veteran of people and adventures.

WHICH SUCKED!!!

"I just..." You trail off.

How would you explain this without sounding crazy? Or weird? Or sounding overdramatic?

"Does it have anythin to do with our new guide?" He huffs, eyes trailing off to the new form huddled by the fire with the champion.

Ignoring the growing embarrassment on your cheeks, your knees curl up to your chest as you avoid the hero's dark eyes. A sound of vague understanding comes form the hero, much to your dismay.

"It's just that..." Biting your lip, you cast your eyes to the new, friendly figure who laughs with the scarred hero before facing the grass once more.

This guide, a new friend that the chain welcomed into the group as they were in need of a knowledgeable mind to aid them through this new, twisting Hyrule, was a soul more gentle than any you've ever faced. They were kind, and funny, and sweet and understanding-- an unfamiliar face you wished to know, but as the boys clap them on the back, bump shoulders and high five...the movements felt so foreign to you. You wanted nothing more than to be beside them, to join in with their laughs, your hand landing on their shoulder as your bellies ache from laughter but the idea made your stomach twist and hand burn.

What if it wasn't the same? Would you offend them? Would they see it in a light you didn't meant to shine? What was the rules to this game you weren't pick for?

"Hey," A gentle voice startles you from your thoughts, Legend, who looks at you so softly that the burn in your nerves soothe. "Look, I dont have a damned clue what your thinkin about or whats the issue, but I aint about to judge ya for it. I promise."

It...wasn't often that the hero- or any of them- made promises...

"I just...I want to be like the chosen or rancher." You sigh, sniffling from the cold night air. "They- they just have these hands and hearts made to reach out and hug but...I- I was never taught that. My heart and hands are rough, they're sweaty and unsure and I just want..."

"Touch?" Legend offers.

"Yeah..." You sigh, hands rubbing your face. "A-and I know it sounds stupid but--"

"It aint stupid." The hero scoffs. "Look, I aint the best with this stuff but...If I can offer some advice or words of wisdom than...Nothing you've done has made us uncomfortable, and if it did than we talked to ya, didn't we? Cause as much as we hold in, we say even more, and our new friend aint any different either. You don't know until you try, and if you cant try first, than just ask. I know it sounds scary, but whats scarier? Having a small conversation, or facing a reality where you made someone you care for uncomfortable around you?"

Silence washes over the both of you as the words tumbling from the hero's mouth comes to an end. Another chime of laughter dances in the air, and this time it doesn't bring tension or raised nerves. It...was peaceful, you guessed.

"Thats easier said than done, ya know?" You turn to Legend with a weary smile.

The boy faces you with a shrug. "Everything is, but this is an issue you wanna solve, right?"

You nod, looking over your shoulder to where your new friend stands, cradling a cup of...something. "Then you gotta solve it, you aint got nobody to hold your hand and walk you through personal relationships. You get advice, but then its you who has to follow through."

"Thats stupid."

"Yeah well, so are you it seems."

"Hey!" Your hand meets the man's shoulder, who offers nothing but a mirth filled huff.

Dusting off your hand, the hero stands with a quiet grunt, stretching his legs before turning back to you, that soft look but an echo now but still there. "You'll be fine, I promise ya."

And just like that, the hero and his wack ass boots turn on his heel and head back into the center of the camp. His words where...harsh, but sometimes a blunt reality check is needed when you're too stuck in your own head.