#so maybe I haven’t changed that much. I still love those shows though they don’t make them like they used to

[arieslost]

fireproofs | ln4

summary: lando norris is hot and the 2024 fireproofs drive you crazy.

word count: 756

warnings: suggestive comments

masterlist — join my tag list here!

© arieslost 2024. DO NOT REPOST WITHOUT PERMISSION.

you’ve been grateful to mclaren for many things over the years, but aside from a fast car, this has to be the best gift they’ve bestowed upon you.

you don’t think it’s an exaggeration when you say that your jaw unhinged the first time you saw lando wearing the new black fireproofs that mclaren has him and oscar in for the 2024 season. he’d sent you pictures, along with a text saying, “what do you think? 👀”

you’d responded with “yeah, not bad” and subsequently spent the next half hour screaming into your pillow. you were able to save face over text, but now that testing is here, you’re a lost cause.

you’d seen lando in black fireproofs before, but something about this year is different. something about him is different. he’s more confident, more determined, and he somehow managed to fill out even more during winter break.

lando had felt bad for mclaren’s car launch sabotaging your valentine’s day, so while you were in the middle of insisting that it wasn’t a big deal, he was booking you a plane ticket to join him in bahrain for the grand prix and testing the week before.

so now, you’re twiddling your thumbs as you sit in your boyfriend’s driver room, both anxious to see him before his testing session begins and hoping he’ll be occupied on the pit wall for just a little longer so you can figure out how to keep your composure once he changes into his race suit.

“you’re still here?” it comes out like half an exclamation and half a question as lando slips into the room.

“you haven’t even gone out on the track, of course i’m still here,” you giggle when he pulls you into his arms and starts pressing kisses all over your face. “i can’t wait to see you put the car through its paces. oscar looked pretty good out there.”

“i’d rather put you through your paces,” he mumbles in your ear, and you smack his shoulder.

“maybe later, if you’re not too tired.”

“i’m never too tired for you.” he winks and kisses your nose before turning to change.

you have no shame in ogling his ass out of the corner of your eye as he does so, but for the most part you’re looking at updates from the first session on your phone until he sits down next to you to put his shoes on.

those damn fireproofs.

they hug his body a little too nicely. the muscles in his chest, back, and arms are perfectly defined courtesy of the tight material. you can’t even think about his shoulder to waist ratio without feeling a little dizzy with desire.

“you’re drooling,” he teases as he stands back up, the both of you knowing damn well that he loves it when you stare at him.

“i can’t help it, you’re too hot.” you’ve never had a problem with telling him just how fine he is, especially because your praise always manages to make him blush and that just makes him impossibly more attractive.

“how am i supposed to let you leave this room?” you complain, wrapping your arms around his torso.

he buries his red face in your shoulder. “the sooner i leave, the sooner i come back and show you a good time.”

“i thought you were taking me out to dinner.”

“that’s what i was talking about,” his tone is dripping in faux innocence, and you know he’s messing with you when you feel him kiss your neck. “good to know where your priorities lie, though.”

you open your mouth to patronize him, but you’re cut off when he squeezes your hips, causing you to yelp. “you are impossible.”

“hmm, good thing you love me so much then.” you can hear his smile as he speaks, and you run your hands across his back, feeling every ridge of muscle through the material of the fireproofs.

your phone starts buzzing in your pocket— the alarm you’d set to remind yourself of when he needed to get in the car. “alright,” you reluctantly separate yourself from him, taking one last lingering look at his figure before he pulls the other half of his race suit on. “i’ll stay for an hour or two and meet you back at the hotel, okay?”

“what dress are you wearing tonight?” he asks as he holds the door open for you.

“the papaya one,” you smirk, and he groans, dragging a hand through his hair.

“you’re gonna kill me, baby.”

note: i wrote most of this at 2 am in a purely feral state and did the bare minimum in editing because i’m drowning in schoolwork so apologies if it’s a bit rough!! mclaren posted a 10 second video of lando and oscar walking around and that was all it took.

lowercase is intentional because i wrote entirely on mobile!

requests are OPEN, and my inbox is always open for comments, criticism, and conversation! feel free to pop in!

reblogs are always appreciated <33

beautiful dividers by @/saradika !

tags (i’m sorry if i couldn’t tag you!): @venusacrossthestars @67-angelofthelordme-67 @emails-i-can-send @emmma232 @lieswithoutfairytales @valisjustvaleria @bwormie @meribfox @xfuckoffx @rai-scutum @clara760-blog @reptaysgf @harryismysworld @caz-93 @positiveaspirations @satanfinalgirl @ln4lova @crazymofo-96 @x-d1vine @anedpev

[raeofgayshine]

I just, how can I be embarrassed of young Elliot’s writing when it’s just so fucking funny?

How can I be embarrassed that my first attempt at writing was a fucking Extreme Makeover Home Edition fic with a family inspired by the dozens of TLC shows I was watching at the time, when objectively it is hilarious that, instead of watching cartoons, I was far more interested in watching shows about family drama or renovating houses, to the point I was so obsessed with them I was writing fic.

And not just one fic either. Like my first fic was that, but also years later when I was deep in my One Direction love, I wrote a second fic with the same premise it’s just One Direction was the celebrity guest on there also.

It’s fucking hilarious, like what kind of kid is like that? This is objectively one of the funniest thing about me as a person, so how can I be embarrassed about that?

[robo-writing]

Toxic ex-boyfriend Simon 🫠🫠

It’s the same routine ever since you broke up with Simon. Call after call, decline after decline, you’ve changed your number twice now and he’s still managed to find you.

He doesn’t take no for an answer, though I suppose you knew this already—The break-up was a pretty big indicator of that, or in his words, your “break.”

“You’re just a bit overwhelmed,” he said to you, not budging a little even with your full weight on him, trying and failing to push him out of your apartment. It’s as if you weren’t even there. “Never had a man treat you like you need to be treated, scared of new sensations?”

That certainly wasn’t the problem, but it was in one ear and out the other with Simon. Honestly, you’re not even sure if it even managed to go in one ear.

“Please, don’t make this difficult,” you begged, giving up on your attempt to push him out. “Just…leave. I don’t want to call the cops.”

At the mention of police he laughs, almost mockingly. It almost scares you.

“Alright then, I’ll entertain your little tantrum for now,” he says, stepping out into the hallway. “But when you’ve finally come to your senses, know that I’ll be waiting for you.”

A pause, and then: “Of course I’ll have to teach you a lesson about being a brat when you do, but you always love my lessons don’t you pet?”

Weeks later his words still ring in your ears.

Weeks later your phone still rings in your hands.

You don’t need to check the caller ID—it’s always an unknown number, but you always know who it is. You let it go to voicemail like usual, but today is a first—a small notification being visible from the corner of your eye.

One voicemail left by: Unknown Caller

Your curiosity peaks, with stubbornness quelling it soon after. It’s a voicemail from your ex, what could he possibly say to you that you haven’t heard a million times before.

Still, it eats away at you. It wasn’t like him to leave a message when he could just call. Hell, knowing him he’s more likely to show up at your door.

It lingers in your mind. You think about it for the rest of the day and it’s now you truly understand the plight of the cat when curiosity seems so enticing.

You relent when you lie awake restless, a losing battle as you find your inbox and hit play.

Your ears are greeted with ambient silence, unsure if maybe Simon left his voicemail open on accident. The moment the thought crosses your mind you hear it, the distinct rumble you know as wholly and purely Simon. There’s a shuffle, then his voice cuts through the empty air.

“Hey there pet. Missed ya.”

You find your eyes rolling as he continues.

“I know, I know, you want to keep me away,” he says breathlessly. “But I’m not sure how long I can keep playing this game.”

There’s a rustling, a deep inhale followed by the sound of something squirting.

“Had to take a minute, forgot I had these,” he says, then takes a moment to laugh. “I’m talking like you can see me, so lemme paint you a nice, clear picture.”

A rather familiar sound of skin against skin has your face growing hotter. You’re in disbelief, willing to deny what you think you’re hearing until Simon confirms it for you.

“Hear that, pet?” He growls. “That’s all me. Could be yours too, if you’d stop being such a fuckin’ brat.”

The sound of his hand is slow, methodical in his purpose. “Nice and wrapped up in those panties I love so much. Pink and satin, the ones you got for valentines—you know the ones.”

A sigh, as if he’s reminiscing. “God, you were a real animal that day. Purred so nicely when I stuffed that cunt of yours.”

Whatever anger you have towards him for stealing your underwear is soon replaced with lust, the sound of the fabric in sync with his hand enough to have you squirming in your bed. His voice like gravel echoes through the speaker, even worse is the slick sounds of what you’re certain is your panties stroking his cock, stained with pre-cum.

More noises, his breathing getting faster and faster. “So fuckin’ soft. Feels good wrapped around me, reminds me of when you’d get so needy you’d need to grind yourself on my thigh.”

Long stretches of time where all you can hear are his breathless moans and his hand moving faster. On instinct your thighs close around nothing as you listen to your ex-boyfriend jerk off in your ears.

“Should see me right now, nice and hard just for you,” he gasps.

Your pussy throbs as if on instinct.

One of your favorite traits about Simon was his undeniably large cock, how it would blush the prettiest shade of rouge at the sight of you, how you struggled to take it every time and how you could feel it in your chest when he fucked you. It’s all you can think about now, any reason you had for breaking up seemingly lost to you.

Another laugh drags you from your thoughts. “You were thinking about me just then, weren’t you?”

Embarrassment burns through your body. You have half a mind to turn off your phone, but you can’t bring yourself to do it. You can practically hear the smugness in his tone.

“Don’t worry, I’m thinking of you too.”

You hate the fact that he’s right. You hate the fact that he knows you so well. You hate the fact that you’re still listening.

You especially hate the fact you want him to do something about the increasing wetness in your panties.

“Just the thought of you, your body—that tight cunt of yours…” He cuts himself off with a moan, the distinct sound of slickness echoing in the speakers.

“God, just thinking about how hungry you must be for my cock…the things I’ll do when I get my hands on you.”

The laugh that emits from him is unhinged, animalistic. It excites you, as guilty as you feel for admitting it.

The sound of his hand speeds up as he talks. “You been taking good care of her in my stead? Touching yourself, getting her nice and prepared for when I come back? I’d hate to re-train her back into my shape.”

He’s so damn vulgar and you love it.

“Just remember, when you’re awake at night, and your thighs are pressing together so pretty, begging for something between them..”

His voice is clear as day, dark and unchained. It sends a full-bodied jolt through your own body, just barely resisting the urge to call.

“…That my cock will always be better than your hand.”

[writeonwhiskey]

the skz house: ch 23 (chan pov)

a/n: thank you @bahablastplz for editing! i really loved writing from chan's pov. i hope you all enjoy this one!!

[ read chapter 22 here ]

Chapter Twenty-Three: Of You

You haven’t spoken to me in days.

A few months ago, this wouldn’t have bothered me at all. I would have been fine with it. I would have preferred it. Here I am now, silently pleading with you at the table to look at me. But you don’t. And it’s my fault. I shouldn’t have said those things to you the other night. I shouldn’t have fucked you like that.

Seeing you hurt as a direct result of my actions has never been easy to accept. In the beginning I brushed it off as being necessary. After you bulldozed through the walls I had up, though, it felt impossible to reassemble them. I’m Humpty fucking Dumpty over here.  

Should I have sent you away when you showed up at our house? Lee Know was in charge of the applicants, so I was floored seeing you walk in behind Seungmin that day. If I’d seen you amongst the candidates beforehand, I would have rejected it...maybe. I would have at least been able to spare you of the bullshit I put you through then, and again now. It’s unfair to you. I know it is.

But once you were here, I didn’t want you to leave. I pushed you away because I needed you to make the choice to go—I’m too selfish when it comes to you, I learned that quickly. I’ve never felt this way about anything before and I honestly don’t know how to cope with it. I feel whole when I’m with you in general, I feel invincible when I’m fucking you…how can this possibly be wrong?

Now I’m left hanging on to the tiniest of threads that connect us and I’m trying not to cling too hard for fear that it will snap from all the weight I bear in this. The thought of losing you terrifies me. And I know it’s inevitable.

I attempt to talk to you after dinner when I see you in the hallway. I want to apologize for my actions, but you cut me off.

“Don’t be. You’re right. We should want to do this and I’m going to give it a try.”

I feel consumed with rage at your words. I want to lash out and scream or punch a hole through the goddamn wall. But I don’t. I let you go.

I have to let you go.  

On Sunday when you come to my room to grab your sheets, you don’t say anything. I deserve it though, don’t I? If I hadn’t taken that trip with you my father wouldn’t have grown suspicious. I wouldn’t have to give you up for the next two weeks when I already have so little time left with you. If I hadn’t opened up to you, this wouldn’t be so hard on both of us. And on top of all that, I’m the one who told you we should be open to this first. I’m reaping what I’ve sown.

Allie comes in a little while later to put her sheets on your bed. The sight of them there doesn’t look right. Neither does she.

I watch as she moves around my room, oblivious to my mood and making small talk. I’m responsive…I think.  I will myself to feel some kind of emotion while looking at her—even if it’s just lust. She’s pretty, I could be attracted to her. If I call her over to my bed right now, she’d come. I could fuck her…but I don’t want to.

My ears perk up when she says she wants to spend the first night with me. As much as I want to object, I don’t. I can’t, really.

After dinner, I quickly shower and get into my own bed with the lights off before she returns. I can’t fall asleep, though. I’m thinking about you. Who are you staying with tonight? Are you sleeping in their bed?

I’m still wide awake when she comes back in, wearing just a towel. I can’t even be bothered to take a gander.

It disturbs me.

She shouldn’t be here. 

“Chan? Are you asleep?” she calls out into the darkness.

I remain silent and still. I hear her change into her pajamas and climb in her—your—bed, and finally feel relaxed enough to actually try falling asleep.

She stays with Hyunjin for the next three days and it feels like a relief. I’d rather be alone. But…being alone, with my thoughts does little to help me. I can’t stop thinking about you. What are you doing? Is Seungmin being good to you?

As fucked up as my mental and emotional state are, on Jeongin’s birthday I can’t keep being a recluse. He’ll be offended if I don’t show up for a little while, at least. So, I join the others in the basement for drinks and karaoke. Drinking to drown my sorrows is not something I enjoy, but tonight I want to. Especially since Allie will be in my room. I don’t want to do anything I might regret—but have you?

I’m one drink deep by the time you come in with Changbin. You seem happy. He offers to get you a drink, which I don’t mind. Then he calls you his girl. Which I do mind.

At that, I finish what’s left in my cup and give myself another heavy-handed pour of whiskey to replenish it. Have you fucked him? I wonder. The thought makes me feel sick to my stomach. I can’t help but feel selfish. In this fucked up situation, I know none of these guys would do anything to intentionally harm you. I know you’re in good hands, but…fuck. I don’t want anyone else on this entire planet to have you.

As the night carries on, everyone’s having a good time and I’m sulking in the corner like a toddler that’s been forced to share his favorite toy. I don’t know how else to feel right now. I am used to seeing you be flirtatious with Hyunjin. Seeing you cuddled up to Changbin on the couch, though, makes me want to snatch you away from him and claim you in front of everyone. But I can’t.

I can’t even be mad at him. He means well. And when he gets up to perform, I’m left smiling at his antics. I couldn’t seriously hate any of them, even if you are involved. I’ve known them for too long. These are my brothers. At the end of everything, they’re the ones who will be with me the rest of my life. Not you.

“Chan-hyung!”

I’m ripped form my confuddled thoughts when Jeongin says my name. I immediately shake my head—I’m not in the mood.

“For my birthday,” he adds. “Stop being boring and old.”

I frown at that.

Then Lee Know is marching towards me, grabbing me by the arm, and pulling me to the other room. I don’t put up too much of a fight—I’m old and boring, after all.

“For your birthday,” I look pointedly at Jeongin to which he beams back at me. “What do you wanna hear?”

“That new song you were finishing up last week,” he says.

“No, not that,” I shake my head.

For my music production minor, I’ve been spending more time in the studio than usual. There’s no better way to get my feelings and frustrations out than through music. Tortured artist and all that.

“Yes, that. It’s my birthday.”

He’s really milking this birthday thing. He connects his phone to the speaker, and I silently curse myself for having sent him the song. Everything I’ve done lately has come back to slap me in the face.

The melody starts to play, and I let out a sigh, trying to shake my troublesome thoughts and get into performance mode. I turn to face the TV; I can’t look at you while I sing this.

“Got so many questions, you seek information. No need to be desperate, we’re just getting started.”

I started writing this song before we even took our trip, but only just booked the studio time to record it. The lyrics cut deeper now than when I originally wrote them. They reveal the way I’ve felt about you. The way I still feel about you.

This is bad, isn’t it?

Do you hate it?

Are you repulsed after the way I treated you?

As I continue singing, I turn around to face everyone. My eyes find you first. You seem taken aback—it’s understandable.

“Locked in sight, we’re in trouble. A lock and a key making rumbles. I know you want me, don’t crumble.”

I avert my gaze before the next lyrics. Looking at you and singing them will make me crumble. But I mean every single word. I never thought I’d meet someone that feels so perfect for me. Why did it have to be like this?

When the song is over, I pass the mic to Rhiannon and retreat back to the bar. You’re performing now. You’re smiling and happy…all the things I wish I could make you. But I can’t. I’m not allowed to. Not for real anyways.

My eyes are so focused on you that I don’t notice Allie until she’s snapping her fingers in front of my face.

“Earth to Chan—you okay?” she places a hand on my shoulder.

“I’m good,” I say, sitting up straight and drinking from my cup.

She’s standing between my legs. Again, I will myself to feel something…anything. Maybe not unbridled attraction, but at least a desire to fuck her. It doesn’t happen. I raise a hand to her waist to test it out, but it doesn’t feel right. I could kiss her right now, get it over with.

“I have class at 8 so I’m gonna head up. You coming?”

I shrug, dropping my hand from her waist.

“Come on,” she says, sliding her hand down my arm to my wrist.

I let her pull me off the chair and up the stairs with her. I guess I could go to my room with her. I probably should.

So, I do. I follow her up the steps, her hand still holding my wrist. We get to my room, and she shuts the door behind us.

“I’m gonna shower first,” I say, in hopes the steam will clear my mind up.

She releases my wrist and I retreat to my bathroom.

I should fuck her. I really should. Even though I don’t feel physically attracted to her, I can think of you to make my dick hard. Then I can fuck her and get you out of my head. I can end this turmoil.

The shower does little to make me feel better. Nothing can make me feel better.

Except you.

I spend far longer than necessary in there and when I get out, I’ve lost all conviction to sleep with her. As I re-enter my room, I’m hoping and praying that she has fallen asleep.

She hasn’t.

“Get some rest…I’m gonna go make a snack.”

“I can make you something,” she offers, pushing the sheets back.

“No, it’s okay—thank you, though. Go to sleep.”

She nods and pulls the blankets back over her.

Downstairs, I sit down on the couch and turn the TV on. I’m not even hungry. I just didn’t want to be in my room with her. I’ve never felt so hung up on someone before, it leaves me at a loss of what to do. If I fuck her, it would only be to help myself move on from you. I’m just not convinced it would work. And I’d hate myself after for it. But have you already moved on? The thought keeps plaguing me.

I remain in place, rooted to the couch, as the others start to file out of the basement. First Han and Charlotte, then Lee Know, then comes Changbin…and you.

He’s drunk. He has one arm slung over your shoulder, and both of yours are wrapped around his waist to support him. You help him up the stairs without so much as a glance in my direction. What are you going to do up there? I want to go up there after you, but I can’t.

The sounds coming from the TV start to annoy me. I mute it and stare blankly at the moving images. I don’t know how much time passes in silence. My attention is drawn to the stairs at the sound of footsteps coming down.

It’s you.

You immediately look away from me and proceed into the kitchen. I shouldn’t follow you. But I’m up and off the couch before I can stop myself. I’m drawn to wherever you are. I’m a magnet and you’re my true north.

With every step I take towards you the voice in my head—my father’s voice—is telling me to stop and turn around and I hate it. I hate that voice. I hate that it wants to steal the one piece of unadulterated happiness I’ve felt in years. You feel like bliss. You feel like hope.

He threatened to make you leave. I swear to God I nearly fucking broke right then and there. He can yell and berate me all he wants, but to threaten to take you away before our time is up? Out of the question. I put up a front, acted nonchalant about you.

‘She doesn’t mean anything, Appa.’

 Lie.

You mean everything.

When I enter the kitchen, you’re grabbing water bottles from the pantry. I don’t have a plan, but I know I need to be near you, so I walk over to the pantry and wait for you to turn around.

The second your eyes land on me, all traces of feeling confused and lost leave my body. I’m found. My body is filled with the purest warmth, and I have to touch you to get more of it. I have to have you. You avert your eyes to the water bottles in your hand and I feel a pain in my chest.

“Why are you doing this to me?” I ask, placing a hand on your waist and pulling you towards me.

It’s an unfair question. You don’t know this inward battle I’ve been fighting since you showed up here. But I don’t know what else to say. It’s less of a question and more of a plea, really.

“I’m not doing anything,” you say softly. “I’m just…existing.”

“That’s all it takes, honestly,” I reply.  

“Chan,” you whisper, shaking your head, eyes still on the water bottles.

You won’t look up at me. Why won’t you look at me? I need you to look at me.

I take a few steps back from the pantry and bring you with me. This is the most I’ve touched you in a week. I’m not letting you go. I hold your waist with one hand and use the other to grab the water bottles, two by two, from your hand and set them on the counter before returning my attention to you.

“I feel like I’m in shambles when I’m away from you,” I admit, hooking a finger under your chin, forcing you to look up at me.

“You’re drunk,” you say, trying to push me away.

I hold on to you tighter, standing my ground.

“I miss you.”

You close your eyes and sigh, shaking your head again. You don’t believe me?

“You can’t.”

“But I do.” I say, bending down to nuzzle my face into your neck.

If you push me away again, I’ll take that as a sign. If you’ve made up your mind, I’ll have to live with it.

I wait for it, but it doesn’t happen.

Instead, you wrap your arms around my neck and pull me closer to you. I take in a deep breath and feel the stars align as the familiar smell of your skin ensnares my senses.

My hand leaves your waist and trails up your back, into your hair. I grab a handful of it and tug back on it. You look up at me with those soft fucking doe eyes that make my insides melt. The complete and utter trust you have in me. I can see it.

I smash my lips against yours, maybe too hard, but I don’t care. I want you. I fucking miss you.

You don’t hesitate to kiss me back, just as passionately. Do you miss me too?

I grab you by the waist and hoist you up on the counter as we kiss. My hands fumble at the waistband of your pajama bottoms. I want you so bad. Why am I nervous? And then, you’re helping me, leaning back and lifting your hips to push them down. I pull them off and toss them on the floor beside us. I scoot you to the edge of the counter and lower myself to my knees.

You tangle your hands in my hair as I rub my nose along your slit, inhaling my favorite scent. You smell so good, baby girl. I use my tongue on you next, needing to have you with all my senses. You throw your head back and let out a quiet whimper as I continue to fill myself with what I’ve been deprived of. What I don’t want to go without.

You.

My hands grip your thighs and as I’m licking, lapping, fucking you with my tongue, the emotions I so desperately willed myself to experience earlier surface. And I know then. I know I’m done for. How can I willingly give this up?

I stand from my knees and pull you off the counter, covering your mouth with mine again.

Do you like the way you taste on me? Your moan says yes.

“My cock throbs every time I see you, y/n,” I tell you, breaking the kiss as I turn you around, groping your breasts over your t-shirt. Your head falls back against my shoulder and litter the side of your neck with kisses. I pull you against me and press my hips against yours. I want you to feel how hard I am. How hard you make me. I could come in my pants right now, without even fucking you.

I’m helpless when it comes to you. Can’t you see that?

“Tell me to stop,” I plead, resting my cheek on yours and thrusting my hips against you again.

You shake your head and lean over on the counter, poking your ass out at me. You’re such a good fucking girl. I slap your ass with the palm of my hand, watching as it jiggles in the dimly lit kitchen. I grab a hand full of it, squeezing tightly.

I push my shorts and boxers down and grab my cock with one hand, holding your hips steady with the other. I rub my cock up and down your slit, groaning at how wet you are. Your pussy is always so wet and ready for me. Do you need me just as much as I need you?

“Every time before I fuck you,” I say, teasing your opening as you moan, “I tell myself I can live without it.”

I ease myself inside of you and we both let out the biggest sigh of relief at the same time.

“But I can’t,” I continue, slowly withdrawing. “I fucking can’t.”

I thrust myself back inside of you with as much force as I can and all hell breaks loose.

I realize the precarious situation we’re in. In the kitchen. But I could not care any less. My cock is home inside of you. This is where I’m supposed to be. And I wouldn’t have it any other way.  

I keep thrusting into you and you fuck me back. You want me just as much as I want you, don’t you? But do you need me like I need you? I can’t ask you that, so I just fuck you harder instead. It’s not healthy to communicate this way, but I can’t bring myself to say these desperate words to you. You take each thrust of my hips without running away and I love it. I fucking love—

No. No. I can’t.

The sound of your hushed moans, combined with the knowledge that we could be caught at any second, have all of my nerves standing at attention. You grip the edges of the counter as I grip your waist, pulling you back against me as hard as I can.

Mine.

Right now, I don’t care if you’ve fucked Seungmin or Changbin or both. They can’t hold a candle to what we have when we’re together like this. That much I’m certain of.

You’re mine, y/n.

You stand on your tiptoes and arch your back. I grit my teeth, and squeeze my eyes shut, trying to shake off my release. I need more. But even with my eyes closed, I can picture how you look in front of me. I have every curve of your body memorized; do you know that? The dimples on your back that I love pressing my thumbs into when I grip your hips. The thought makes me growl as I pummel into you harder and faster.

You’re perfect. I need you to know that. With every thrust, every grunt, every moan. I need you to know.

“Chan,” I hear you say and my eyes snap open.

I see your hand buried between your legs, rubbing your clit and working yourself to an orgasm.

Yes. Please, baby girl. Come on my cock.

I feel your pussy, my pussy, clench around my cock as your legs start to shake and I let myself go too; thrusting into you with reckless abandon as I come.

I’m convinced there’s no better feeling in the world.

I’m glad you stayed.

I’m glad I didn’t see your name on the list before you showed up.

Your legs continue to quiver as I lay myself across your back, leaving my cock inside of you.

I don’t want to move.

I don’t want you to leave me.

[ read chapter 24 here ]

a/n: HOW ARE WE FEELING, MY LOVES? poor baby chan is stuck between a rock and a (constantly) hard place. i am so so so excited to hear your thoughts.

[gamerwoo]

dumb/random things skz would do while ur dating

a/n: don’t ask me what this is or why i came up w it these are just Thoughts That I Have Sometimes��

-

chan: if he has spare time and gets bored, he’ll splice up voicemails or voice messages you’ve sent him to make you say random shit and then he sends it to you out of nowhere with absolutely zero context. it could be anywhere from the raunchiest, dirtiest things you’ve ever heard, to just straight up dumb things, to him making you say how amazing and great he is and how much you love him. either way, he thinks he’s hilarious

minho: literally just stares at you for no reason. you’re on your phone across the room and he’s staring. just deadpan staring. and once you notice and make eye contact he gives you a mean look like you were staring at him first and he’s mad about it. even after you look away, he’s still staring. if you ask what he wants he’ll be like “why tf are you staring at me?? get a hobby, freak”

changbin: actually expects you to open doors for him and pull out his chair and lay your jacket out over a puddle. if you don’t, he just stares at you and eyes the thing he wanted you to do for him. obviously you’d never put your jacket over a puddle when he could literally walk around it but he’ll scoff and dramatically roll his eyes and make some comment about “guess romance really is dead” or something dumb

hyunjin: maybe he used to actually sketch you really nicely at one point but now he’s comfortable with you and now the only times he draws you is a really rough and quick sketch that’s so poorly done and it’s always you making ugly faces and he just slides it over to you and goes “this is you rn" and it’s you looking very pissed off and with a unibrow and you’re shrimp-backing so hard

jisung: keeps making those powerpoint presentations for you about different topics but he only makes them between like 11pm-3am so the farther into it he gets, the weirder it gets and the less sense it makes. usually the topics don’t really make sense either, though. like the time he showed you ‘101 reasons why you should still love me as a worm :)’. but there was the time he presented you with ‘69 reasons why i love you’ and even though 25% of them were weird things like ‘your breath smells normal’ and ‘you haven’t committed a felony so i don’t have to have a long distance relationship with someone in prison’ you still thought it was pretty sweet

felix: if you think he won’t act like those cringey gamer couples, you’re so fucking wrong. whether he’s doing it ironically or seriously, he’s going to drag you into his shenanigans. your names on different games have to match. they’ve been shit like ‘their dps / his pocket’ and 'grilled cheese / tomato soup’ to unhinged things like ‘mike huchie / mike hunt’ and ‘blowing smoke / smoke’. he always thinks it’s so fucking funny but you want to die. your discord names are ‘their daddy / his kitten’ and whenever you change it, he changes it back

seungmin: he does literally anything and pretends it wasn’t him. plays with your hair while you’re cooking dinner, but when you turn to look at him, he looks around and starts whistling. he’ll knock your closed water bottle straight out of your hand for no reason and then shrug at you like it was the fucking wind. even when he kisses your cheek he’ll gasp and be like “who did that?”

jeongin: he’ll act cute or whatever when he wants something but god forbid you do it back. the amount of judging he’ll do will make you want to leave the house. “please don’t ever do that again, you’re embarrassing me” as if you didn’t just copy everything he’s ever done to you. he’s gone so far as to pretend he doesn’t know you out in public over this. only he can be cute to get his way. if you do it, it’s cringe

[danikamariewrites]

hii!! I was wondering if u could write a fic with azriel and one of the spies he trains, kind of like arobynn and aelin but not creepy lol. azriel always protects reader yet when rhys notices the special treatment in his court, he grows distant. angst ensues!! possibly smut whatever youre feeling!

My Sweet Spy

Azriel x reader

Notes: I hope you don’t mind that it’s in bullet form anon! I can’t believe I haven’t thought of something like this before, I did change it a little and made them fall in love (so not rlly a master and apprentice thing) I also don’t know the word count for this but know it’s a lot.

Warnings: angst, enemies to friends to lovers, fighting and violence, blood (apologies for any typos I sped through editing this)

Your father was one of Azriel’s senior spies. At 100 years old you were still acting like a petulant child, driving your father mad. Being at his wits end he dropped you off in Velaris for training with Azriel. It was more of a punishment than anything

He wanted the high lord and spymaster to set you straight

During one of your father’s more high profile missions he was attacked and didn’t survive

His death made you resent Azriel for a long time

You didn’t come to training on time or at all some days, you wouldn’t speak for almost a year, and you acted out so bad (during Nesta’s stint at the bars as well) you and Nesta were separated and it was time for an intervention

While Nesta stayed at the House of Wind you stayed in the Town House

You still refused to speak with anyone, especially Azriel, but you pulled yourself together

Though your father was a hard-ass you loved him dearly. He was the only person you had left in the world

Realizing you couldn’t blame Azriel or Rhysand for his death you started putting in the effort of training and being a better person. If anything you were really at training for Nesta. You missed your friend and she was the only person you would talk to. Meeting Gwyn and Emerie at training made you light up. You hadn’t had many friends as an adult so this group of girls excited you.

You still wouldn’t speak to Azriel. At least not in depth. You would acknowledge him, giving him nods and the occasional yes and no. Azriel tried so hard to get you to open up. He apologized about your father’s death and even went as far as buying you a box of your favorite pastries, but nothing.

Months after Nyx was born and Nesta, Gwyn, & Emerie won the Blood Rite you were starting to warm up to everyone. You even spoke to Azriel, “Thank you.” Azriel was taken aback by how quietly you approached him, even his shadows were unaware of you. “You’re welcome.” He didn’t ask for what. Azriel had a feeling that those two words encompassed everything from putting up with you to housing and training you.

You started going to family dinners and get togethers more. While you still didn’t talk much you were showing more emotion.

You were on time for training and showed improvement. To Azriel’s surprise you were more skilled than he thought. When he reported your progress to Rhys he seemed to take interest in your skills. “Maybe her father taught her more tricks of the trade than we thought.” Azriel didn’t like what Rhys’s tone was suggesting.

Azriel tensed, waiting for the order he knew was coming. Rhys gave his brother a look he knew all too well. Then the dreaded words left his mouth, “I want you to build her up. Y/n’s father was a valuable asset, we need that again.” Azriel clenched his jaw. Doing his best to bite his tongue to think about his words.

The Spymaster knew this was an order from his High Lord, not a suggestion from his brother.

So Azriel began your training. You became more observant, an extension of Azriel’s shadows. His own shadows took a liking to you. Becoming their second master on missions, they protected you.

The only missions Azriel would take you on would be a year after your training started. And they would never be solo trips. You would go with him or another partner on short missions. You were never far from Velaris and if need be Azriel could come get you if you were in danger.

There was definitely a few tense nights where you two spent the night at an inn. You two never knew how to approach each other, never wanting to say the wrong thing to one another.

Your first solo mission was given to you by Rhys. The High Lord went over his brother’s head assigning you this. “I believe you are ready to do this y/n. You have shown change and a tenacity I haven’t seen since Feyre under the mountain.”

The high praise from Rhys made your heart soar. The fact that your change was noticed made you feel like life was going well. That there was a place for you.

“Thank you, Rhysand.” You bow your head slightly. “Azriel has trained you well, and you’ve done excellent work over the last few months.” Rhys slides a file across his desk to you. Opening it he informs you that you’ll be traveling to just outside Vallahan. A male who was once on Kier’s council defected and has been on the run for years. He has crimes to answer for and you will be delivering the High Lord’s justice.

When you didn’t show up to training Azriel went looking for you. Not being able to find you in the House he went to Rhys. “I sent her on a mission to the continent. Caliban was sighted and I thought she was the perfect person to handle it.”

Steam was coming out of Azriel’s ears. “How. Dare. You,” he gritted out. Rhys’s eyes widen at the change in his brother’s mood. Azriel was borderline erratic. “How dare you make that call!” Rhys held up a hand. “Brother, please. Calm down and think—” “Don’t tell me to cam down! Y/n has never been to the Continent! And she is far from ready to do something like this on her own!”

“Az just listen—” Azriel closed his eyes, taking deep breathes. “Where?” Rhys gave him a questioning look. “Where on the Continent id you fucking send her?” His voice was growing angrier with each word. Once Rhys told him he punched his brother square in the face and stormed out of the house.

Your father didn’t make many enemies but he had one that eluded him for years, Caliban. Once considered royalty in the Hewn City he became a fugitive of the Night Court. Now you were his target. Somehow he found out that he is your mission in Vallahan. Instead of running again he decided to face you.

Caliban made it easy for you to track him. To the point where you knew it was a trap

“You look just like your father,” was the first thing he said to you. “I suppose you’ll be just as easy to kill.” All rational thoughts left your head. You saw red as you charged at him. Azriel had taught you to used controlled emotion through your fighting technique, helping you unlearn your irrational behavior.

Diving at Caliban he swiftly side stepped you, a smirk dancing on his lips. “Still a petulant child I see.” You let out growl from deep in your throat. Jumping to your feet you unsheathed the dagger from your thigh. Caliban drew his own from thin air, ready to fight.

You slashed hard, chasing every step he took with a more aggressive one of your own. If Caliban was going to kill you, you were going to make it hard for him.

If you were going to die tonight you were taking this vile murderer with you.

Letting your rage take hold your moves become erratic. Distracted. Caliban lands a blow to your gut forcing you to double over. He grabs a fist full of your hair, clutching it as tight as possible he punched your face over and over again. Once your face was drenched in blood Caliban dropped you to the ground.

You were breathing heavily through your mouth trying to regain your strength. To get back up and fight again.

Caliban circles you, sneering down at you. “Poor little spy. Going to die all alone just like her father.” He lets out a deep laugh. A burst of anger rushed through you. Holding on tight to your dagger you quickly sit up and slash at Caliban’s inner thigh.

He howls in pain and drops to the ground next to you. “You bitch!” He spits at you. You laugh, collapsing on your back.

As the edges of your vision blur all you can think about is your friends. Specifically Azriel. He has been a constant, steady presence over the last few years.

All you could think about was how ungrateful you’d been to him. All the attitude you gave him that you never apologized for. All the things you didn’t let go of and had blamed him for, like your new shitty life and your father’s death.

But your life wasn’t shitty. It was good and you had a purpose.

Your father’s murderer was going to get up and you weren’t going to fight back because you were just so, so tired. And maybe you deserved to die. But you didn’t want to die without telling Azriel everything you were thinking.

Caliban screamed in pain. Turning to face him you see your guardian angel kneeling over him. Truthteller dripping with Caliban’s blood.

Azriel was fuming. His chest moving up and down with his rapid breaths. “Azriel,” you croak out. He snaps out of his trance. “Y/n,” he slide over to you on his knees, cradling your head in his hands. “It’s ok. We’re going to take you home.”

Mor appeared over his shoulder. A relieved smile gracing her full lips. Azriel stands with you in his arms. Mor holds onto his arm winnowing you both back to the Town House. Azriel brings you right up to his old room, setting you down gently on the bed.

Mor comes back with Madja in tow. The old healer giving Azriel a look that said “I know this is your brother’s fault” as she mended your broken nose.

Azriel holds your hand the whole time, being that silent calming presence for you until Madja left

“Why didn’t you fight harder? I know you could’ve gotten up.” There was pain in his voice. A long painful silence fell between you two before you answered. “I thought maybe I deserved it.” Tears silently fall down your cheeks as Azriel lightly squeezes your hand. He felt his heart crack a little. “I’m sorry,” you whisper. “For everything.”

Azriel shakes his head, his heart fully cleaving in two. “There is nothing to be sorry for y/n. Things haven’t been easy for you and I’ve seen that.” Azriel pulls you onto his lap hugging you to his chest as you sob.

Weeks later Azriel hasn’t left your side. Your words troubled him and he wants to show you that you deserve everything good in life. It was his mission to make sure you stopped punishing yourself for his past.

While Cassian gave him suggestions Azriel ignored his brother. His and Nesta’s relationship got off to a rocky start and the couple are still working their issues out.

Az decided to take a different approach with you. Some days you would take breaks from training. He would take you out to eat in the city or for a bonding activity, as Az liked to call it.

You gave him a questioning look the first time he suggested it. Then followed up with, “We do what I want everyday. Let’s do something you want to do.” You raised a brow at him. Feeling like this was a trap. But you’d take it. “Ok,” you shrugged and headed out the door.

You dragged Azriel from shop to shop to see where his limit would be for you buying extravagant items. He didn’t complain once though. Az just smiled and held a majority of the bags for you

Over the next few months you became closer with Azriel. The two of you have gotten so close you consider him one of your best friends. The spymaster quickly became your confidant. You opened up to him about things you haven’t even told Nesta.

It was your scheduled fudge night, where you each bring a different kind of fudge home, eat and gossip. Along with the occasional glass of wine. You were laughing about a story Az was telling you about Cassian in their 30’s. Rhys away with his father and the pair decided to party it up in the city without their brother. Azriel isn’t sure how he lost Cassian but when he finally found the General he was floating on his back in the Sidra.

“Just floating,” you snorted out covering your mouth. “Yes! He told me he saw a mermaid and just had to woo her.” That made you laugh even harder, leaning on his shoulder as you regained your composure. Azriel’s heart stutters at your palm lying flat against his chest. Your touch is soft and welcomed.

Az smiles down at you, watching the color of your cheeks go from that cherry red to their normal color. Your lips still pulled into a smile as you wipe the tears from your eyes. Azriel didn’t realize that he was softly smiling at you until you looked at him asking, “What?” He shook his head, “Nothing.” His voice gentle.

You brush it off going back to the chocolate peanut butter fudge Azriel brought. Taking a bite and sinking back into the cushions you ask for another embarrassing story. Azriel obliges because he could never deny you.

Another bonding activity you two cherish is painting. Like for the kids Feyre runs classes for you and Az find it therapeutic

Once a month, when there’s a free afternoon in the studio’s schedule, Feyre lets you two have a free paint session. You and Az set up easels to face each other and chat while you paint.

Your first painting session was silent except for the sound of the brushes and occasional question azriel would ask you. You only gave him one word answers of course. And the painting you made was a mess of colors. You just had to get your anger put and didn’t feel like trying. At the end of the hour you shoved it in the trash can and left without Azriel.

Today that first session felt like a lifetime ago. You were chatting with Azriel, gossiping and laughing like you’ve been friends for centuries

This time you were adding to a painting you started two months ago. You really wanted to get better at drawing and even asked Feyre to teach you the basics in your free time. Hands are a hard thing to draw but the skill came quite easy to you.

Putting the finishing touches on the shading of the sword you stand back and admire your hard work. It’s of one of the most important moments in your life, when Azriel taught you how to hold a sword. On that day you knew everything would change. There was a new trust between you and Azriel, he trusted you and believed in your abilities. It felt like the first time someone really believed in you, like your potential was truly seen.

In the painting Azriel was guiding your hand to grip the hilt correctly. The sapphire siphons looked like they were glowing and the white ribbon you cut on your fourth try was wrapped around your wrist.

“Are you finally going to let me see it?” Az asked, dragging his own brush in long strokes across the canvas. You squinted your eyes in thought, debating if you truly wanted to show him or wait for Feyre’s critique. “I guess,” you sigh.

Azriel laid down his brush and pallet, wiping his hands off with a paint cover cloth. Coming to face your painting his jaw dropped and his eyebrows shot up to his hairline. Azriel was rendered speechless by your skills. “Wow,” he breathed out. “Y/n…this is incredible. The detail. My scars even,” his scared hand reached out to touch the painting before he realized he shouldn’t. Instead he mindlessly moved to gently hold your hand.

The two of you stood there staring at your art for a while. You finally noticed Azriel had laced his fingers with yours. You smile at your joined hands, squeezing his before staring back at the painting.

Azriel looks down at you, that love sick smile you always seem to miss was on his face again. Just as he’s about to say something (he hoped would be romantic) Feyre came back from lunch. The bell above the door chimed causing you to jump apart.

“Wow!” She quickly made her way over to you to get a better look at your painting. “Y/n! This is fantastic! We must get it framed and hang it in the house.” The High Lady rambled on, praising your skills.

Azriel crept out as you and Feyre talked. He would talk to you again and there would be another time to tell you what was on his mind.

Missions these days were always vetted by Azriel before Rhys asked you to do anything. You haven’t been doing many lately anyway. Helping Azriel delegate, strategizing, and desk work has been your strong suit.

When Rhys noticed he called you both to his office. Azriel could tell Rhys was angry with him. He knew his brother’s tells well enough. You on the other hand just thought Rhys wanted a progress report on your skills again.

“Sit,” the High Lord said through gritted teeth. You tried to avert Rhy’s gaze while Azriel held strong, staring his brother down. Azriel would stand by his decision to keep you safe. That day he found you with Caliban scared the shit out of him. He never wanted you out there alone or without him again.

Rhys looked at you first. “I’ve noticed you haven’t been going into the field lately.” You shook your head, finally looking at your High Lord. “Care to explain.” You didn’t know what to say. Wouldn’t this be a problem between him and Az. “I—Az has been pairing me up less. I’ve been training more with the Valkyries and field work has been pushed back.”

Rhys let out a hum, his lips pulled into a thin line. “Azriel,” he directed his attention to his brother whose eyes haven’t left him once. “Why isn’t she out there? Is she not one of your spies? Is there not work to be done?” Azriel clenched his jaw. Once again biting his tongue.

“I have had y/n doing other tasks she is comfortable with.” Azriel’s voice was restrained. He saw right through Rhys’s questions and damn him. Azriel saw you were reluctant to go out after Caliban so he made a choice that would keep you safe. “Was it y/n’s choice or yours?” Before Azriel could explode on Rhys you rest a hand on his thigh for comfort. “It was my decision, Rhys. I haven’t been the best out in the field and Azriel found what I’m good at.” You look between the two of them with a small smile to diffuse the tension.

Rhys returned your smile giving you a nod. “I’m glad that you found something you like. Could you give Azriel and I a moment please.” You wordlessly get up and give Azriel’s shoulder an encouraging squeeze.

Once they were sure you were down the hall Rhys began his tirade. “You do not get to decide what her limits are. I know what she said just now, that was clearly to cover for you. But you cannot keep treating y/n like this.” “Like what,” Azriel spat back.

“Like she is a child! Y/n has come very far in her career, something her father would be proud of. By resigning her to desk work you tear down all the confidence she has built. You’ve kept her away from everything since Caliban. I needed her in the Hewn City and you told me no. I needed her in Autumn and Day and you shot those down too. Why?” Rhys was trying to keep his cool but there was a desperation to his questions.

Azriel stood from his chair. “She doesn’t want to be her father. Y/n is more than this.” Realization flashed in Rhys’s eyes. “Y/n has truly found something she is good at. She’s one of the smartest people I’ve ever met and one of your best strategists.” Without another word Azriel turned on his heel and left.

After that conversation Rhys laid off you more. He quickly realized things were more organized since you had left spying

You kept your distance from Azriel for a few days, unsure if you got him in trouble by lying to the High Lord. Well, it wasn’t a complete lie. Az just suggested a new position and you took it.

Did you work for those few days? No. You took them to rest. You haven’t taken a day off in over a year so, why not relax.

You baked cookies, something you used to do with your grandmother every week. You decided on snicker-doodles to enjoy while starting the stack of books Nesta and Emerie suggested you read.

Azriel also gave you your space. He’s been by your side for months at this point. You could use a few days without him, even though it pained him. Azriel loved spending time with you. Sure you brought chaos into his life, but it was the good kind.

On day four of being apart Azriel couldn’t take it anymore. He found you wrapped in your favorite blanket in one of the least used siting rooms in the House of Wind. A fire roaring in the hearth to keep you warm, a mug of tea next to a plate of cookies ready for you when you take a break.

Putting your book down you finally notice Az staring at you in the doorway. That love sick smile he thinks you don’t notice plastered on his face. “Hey,” you say excitedly. “Come, sit with me.” You pat the spot on the couch next to you.

He plops down next to you, curling a wing around you for extra warmth. Without a second thought you snuggle into his side. A blush dusts Azriel’s tan cheeks as he looks away from you. You giggle at the sight of the feared spymaster blushing.

You gently trace his cheek down to his jaw, taking in his beauty. Over the last year you had become very taken with Azriel. He had been there for you no matter what you threw at him. You pull Azriel’s face to look at you. You met his hazel eyes that held so much love and adoration for you, you just didn’t see it.

“Y/n I, there’s something I’ve wanted to say and I just—” Azriel cut himself off with a shake of his head, leaning in so his lips meet yours in a soft kiss you’ve been waiting months for. You kissed him back, running your fingers through his hair.

Breaking apart you give him a giddy smile. It was the most genuine look he’s seen on you since you came to them. “That was better than anything you could’ve said.” You whisper, leaning your forehead against his. Az smiled back, “I still have so much I want to say. Have to say.” “I have all the time to listen.”

[the-boy-meets-evil]

maybe something sweet and fluffy with woozi. trying to stay late to surprise him with dinner or something but he finds you asleep on the couch. he's been stressed and working more than usual (insane behavior) and you just wanna help him relax and take the weight off his shoulders

pairing: jihoon x gn!reader genre: est. relationship | fluff, maybe the tiniest bit suggestive rating: e for everyone (but this blog is still 18+) word count: 1440 warnings: mentions of food but nothing else

author's note: thank you for sending this! i am painfully late with this (and wanted to wait to finish all the requests before posting). this is for my baby @effortandmore for her birthday drabbles. ily lauren 💕 divider by @cafekitsune

taglist: @crepecakeu, @tinyelfperson, @dokyeomkyeom, @miriamxsworld, @hongrizoon, @klecksstorys, @gyuminusone, @aaniag, @naajaeminsgf, @straykidswhoo789, @kimseokgen, @beomesbabe, @haolistic, @harry-the-pottypus, @pyeonghongrie-main, @nuttywastelandmentality (strikethrough means can’t tag, check your settings!), join my taglist here

You’ve loved Jihoon for a long time. As a friend first and then slowly as something much more. When you first met him, you thought he was hard to read. Difficult to ever really know. As you spent more time around him, that idea morphed into something else as well. He’s not the kind of person to be vocal about what he’s thinking or feeling. If you’re waiting for him to tell you how he feels, then you’re going to be waiting for a while. Unless you know where to look.

That’s probably why it took you time to realize all the ways he was telling you that you were more than a friend to him. Over time, he started inviting you just to be around him when he was working on projects at home. Or inviting you over to do your own work at his place while he did chores around the house. Slowly, you realized that he always had your favorite snacks in the cupboards and favorite drinks in the fridge. Occasionally you would even mention needing something in passing and it would show up delivered to your house a day or two later. Never with a note, but always with the understanding that it was Jihoon taking care of it. Taking care of you. You realized that your heart shifted to caring about him as more than a friend before your brain even caught up. It was like he had been showing you all along that you could depend on him. 

Jihoon isn’t always one to say what he’s feeling, but he likes to hear it from you. It’s cute to watch his face light up when you tell him how much he means to you or why you think about him throughout the day. He’s easy, though, because he’s just as happy to have you around. Sometimes you don’t say anything at all, just curl up on the couch to watch a favorite show. Those are some of your favorites because you know how much space he’s made for you in his home. You know how important that space is to him so that he can recharge. But, he accepts you like you always belonged there with him. 

Lately, work has been a little overwhelming for him. Maybe not overwhelming as much as busy. You know how much he likes to be busy and would prefer that to work being too slow. It’s also clear how much he likes to solve a problem and be the one to find that elusive solution. So, this project has been challenging, often resulting in him staying late, and you know he wouldn’t change it. Even on the nights where he doesn’t get home until it’s nearly time for bed. 

Tonight, you’re trying to do something a little bit nice for him. It’s been days on end, even some weekends, of him busting his ass on this project. And you don’t understand the words he’s using. Haven’t ever really been tech savvy enough to get programming. What you do know, though, is that he’s been surviving on too much caffeine and food delivery. Sometimes he does listen and order from healthier places. Sometimes it’s all he can do to remember to eat at all, so it’s whatever can get to him fastest. But, he seemed pretty confident that he would be out of work at a decent time tonight. You decide to use your key to his place and let yourself in to surprise him with a great home-cooked meal.

For someone that doesn’t really like cooking that much, Jihoon has a pretty well-stocked kitchen. Although, knowing how considerate he is, that’s probably mostly because you liked to cook at his place and complained about all the things he didn’t have. All you need to do is show up with your ingredients. You decide on a menu of comforting foods that also can either keep warm on the stove or be easily warmed up without losing flavor. 

You figure that you should let him know that you’re going to be there when he gets home so it doesn’t surprise him. The food can be the surprise even if he knows you’re there waiting for him. He seems excited to see you when you text him. When the food is all ready, you figure that you can have a glass of wine while you wait. 

Jihoon: i’m so sorry, this is taking longer than i thought to wrap up

You: that’s fine, take your time

It’s not uncommon for Jihoon to send a text like that when he’s in the middle of a project. He hates it and you know he does. But, you also assure him that it’s fine. You didn’t have any actual plans and he doesn’t need to rush through work on your account. 

While you’re waiting, you decide on a little taste test of the food you made, careful not to make it too obvious that you’ve had some. Not that he would care, you just want the presentation to be nice for Jihoon. With some good food and a glass of wine down, you’re a little sleepy. Cooking can do that to you. There’s no harm, you figure, in getting comfortable on the couch while you wait and putting on some background noise. 

You don’t even realize that you drift off until you feel someone’s arms sliding underneath you. Your eyes flitter open and land on Jihoon. He’s got his shaggy hair pulled back into an elastic with strands falling out from the length of the day. His face is soft with nothing more than complete love and adoration. It’s so clear that he doesn’t want to disturb you and that makes your heart constrict further. This man has been working for who knows how many hours and he’s still taking care of you.

“I’m awake, babe,” you say through a slightly groggy voice.

“Sorry, was trying not to wake you up,” he says and pulls his arms back.

You catch one of his hands to pull him back in for a quick kiss. “I’m glad I woke up.”

“The place smells really good,” he comments.

“Yeah, I made dinner,” you say.

His face brightens for a moment and it makes you nearly melt. “I would’ve left sooner if I’d known.” 

“It’s a surprise, you goober,” you say with a smile. You pull yourself into a sitting position.

“Hey, it’s fine, I can get a plate,” he says.

“No, no. You go have a nice shower and by the time you’re out, I’ll have it all ready,” you say and get to your feet.

“You don’t have to…” he starts and you press another kiss to his lips before turning him in the direction of the bathroom.

“Go,” you say.

It takes a minute to shake off the cobwebs from your unexpected nap. By the time you’re in the kitchen and warming everything back up, you can hear the water running in the bathroom and the music audible even over the sound of the shower. It sounds like one of his more upbeat playlists, which is a good thing. Even if he doesn’t say much, you can always tell his mood by what playlist he puts on. Tonight, it seems like he’s in a good mood despite the long day at work. Part of you hopes that you surprising him adds to the good mood. 

The water shuts off, leaving only the playlist as your background and you know you still have a little bit of time before he emerges. So, it’ll be perfect timing as nearly everything is ready again. You’re putting a plate together when he emerges from his bedroom in gym shorts and a t-shirt, wet hair still falling around his face. The smile on your face is instant.

“What?” he asks.

“You’re just beautiful,” you say, smile still bright.

“I must look exhausted,” he brushes off.

“Still beautiful,” you insist and delight in the way blush creeps up his neck. To save him from saying anything, you hand over a plate.

“Can’t believe you did this,” he mumbles softly.

“I thought you deserved a treat,” you say as you grab your own plate. 

“Just having you here is a treat,” he says, unusually sappy with you.

“So you don’t want the rest of the post-dinner treats I planned?” you ask innocently. 

“Didn’t say that,” he says, locking eyes with you.

“How early do you have to be in tomorrow?” you ask. 

“I have the day off,” he says.

“Don’t get too full, then. I’ve got plenty of surprises for you,” you say. 

hope you enjoyed it! let me know 💕

[soulofapatrick]

The Beauty and the Brawn - Emmett Cullen x Reader

Summary: You try to prove to Emmett that he won’t hurt you with his enhanced strengths

Words: 2k

Warnings: Oral (F!recieving) 

Notes: idk what this is really, just had the idea for a few days 

Y/N’s POV

Emmett is strong, stronger than most vampires having gotten enhanced strength when he was changed. He’s always seen it as an added perk as it’s not something drastic like Alice’s future telling or Benjamin’s elemental manipulations, it was just that he was a little stronger than the others. Nothing more, nothing less. 

Then he met me and now, as much as I tell him otherwise, he sees his strength as a curse. He gets scared he’ll get too carried away with me, forget I’m still human and accidentally hurt me or kill me. As much as I reassure Emmett that he could never hurt me he will still try and avoid the topic, kissing me the most he trust himself to do. Every time we get hot and heavy and I guide things on a little he backs up with that pained look in his eyes. Everything about him screams that he wants me back but the pain in his eyes tells me he’s scared which always catches me off guard as this is Emmett Cullen. Outgoing, loud and loving Emmett… too scared to even touch me at times despite how much his feelings were mutual. 

Today is no different and I decide to take a different approach, even if it doesn’t mean sex. I just want Emmett to see that he can trust himself with me and that I’m not as fragile as he thinks. We’re sat on his bed, a bed he got Carlisle to get without specifying why. The Cullen’s don’t know me yet except maybe Alice and Edward because of their gifts but they apparently haven’t said anything to the others. Emmett doesn’t want them to all bombard me and he’s also worried about how Rosalie will take it that he’s moved on already which I understand and I agreed to take it as slow as he wants with meeting them.

Emmett’s hand is on my thighs as we sit shoulder to shoulder, watching a movie on the TV he also had installed. I’m barely paying attention to it though, focusing on his icy touch on my bare skin, being in only shorts as it’s just us here for another day to two. Emmett said the others had gone on a hunting trip and he elected to say home. I say fuck it, it’s now or never so I’m turning my body to face him, reaching over to cup his cheek and I ask, “Do you trust me?” 

“Of course I do, why-“ He’s frowning until I begin shifting, moving onto my knees and turning my body towards him, “Y/N, I-“

“Just trust me baby,” I stroke his cheek reassuringly, watching him lean into my palm and those beautiful golden eyes flutter shut for a moment. With Emmett’s eyes still closed I shift my body further until I’m straddling him, legs either side of his thick thighs. His muscles tense as he realises I’m seated, arms resisting ever so slightly when I guide his hands to my hips, holding them there to show him that he won’t hurt me. The heat seems to rise between us as I lean in, lips almost touching his as I whisper, “Emmett, I trust you. I trust you with everything.” 

His eyes fly open at this, the confusion and fear in them until he sees I’m not lying to him, keeping my face open and honestly so he can see the trust and love and it works as his expression softens, “Y/N.” He’s whispering, voice filled with emotions that I can’t quite decipher so I just lean forwards again and capture his lips in a gentle and pliant kiss. The kiss is tender and slow, as if we’re exploring each other for the first time. My heart is racing as I feel the softness of his lips against mine, the taste of him sweet and familiar, the tension in Emmett’s body slowly melting away as he gets lost in the kiss so I take another risk and deep it. Emmett’s hands are moving up and down my sides and back, testing the waters cautiously and the feel of his hands on my skin sends shivers down my spine, knowing I want more. 

Too soon am I having to break the kiss as unlike Emmett I still need to consume oxygen. His golden eyes have darkened a little with love and desire, a soft sound leaving him when I caress his cheek gently, “Emmett,” My voice is a barely above a whisper, as if scared to break the moment, “I need you. Need all of you.” 

Emmett’s eyes widen in surprise at the bluntness of my words, looking at me intently as if trying to decipher if I’m really serious about what I said. I can see the mixture of emotions playing across his face - desire; love; fear and protectiveness. I stay seated in his lap as I wait for his response, letting him work through his emotions and letting him decide. He wants me but he’s afraid of hurting me, his hands retreating again so I catch them in mine and squeeze reassuringly. His eyes flick down to our interlocked hands before back to my face before he’s swallowing and mumbling out, “Start with a shower first?” 

“Whatever you want Pretty Boy.” I’m nodding, guiding one of his large hands to my cheek and pressing a kiss to his open palm before he’s surprising me and drawing me into another kiss. This one’s different, he’s not holding back as much, it’s hungrier almost. There’s an urgency to the kiss, his lips moving with more purpose as his moves to the back of my head, deepening the kiss. His other hand finds it’s way back to my waist, pulling me flush against him. It’s like he’s been holding back for so long and how he’s finally allowing himself to let go and now he can’t seem to get enough. I respond with equal fervour, my hands tangling in his hair as we explore each other’s mouths. 

Emmett’s breaking the kiss before me, standing up effortlessly and cradling me in his arms as if I weight nothing which I guess I really don’t for him. I’m wrapping my arms around his broad shoulders, holding on tight as he carries me to the bathroom, feeling his muscles tense and flex under his shirt with each step. He’s setting me on the counter, a playful smile on his face and a rumble in his chest when I squeal at how cold the counter is. He’s stealing another kiss from me before moving to turn on the shower, letting it heat up and moving back over to me, standing between my legs. He’s looking at me with a soft expression, making sure this is what I really want, his hands running over my waist and pulling back slightly to ask, “You sure about this, honey?” His eyes are filled with concern and love, making me feel even more secure in my decision. 

To prove my point I pull my shirt over my head and letting it fall to the floor, watching Emmett’s lips part slightly in a hitched breath at the sight of me now bare except for a pair of shorts. Emmett’s eyes are skimming over my body, taking in every dip and curve and scar on display to him. His hands coming up to gently trace along my arms and down my sides, as if savouring the feeling of my skin against his fingertips. Despite his obvious desire he still checks with me if this is okay, eyes flicking back up to mine every few seconds until I’m guiding his hands up to my breasts, watching his reaction. He surprises me by dragging me into such a tender and loving kiss as he explores this new territory. 

Our bodies press together, Emmett’s hands now tracing circles on my back as he deepens the kiss, his very obvious arousal pressing into my thigh but he’s taking it slow as if he’ll spook me. His lips move down my neck as he murmurs against the skin, “You’re so fucking beautiful.” His large hands grip my hips and I’m soon standing again, feeling cold fingers dip into the waistband of my shorts. 

“Please.” I’m practically begging and Emmett’s groaning into the crook of my neck, surprising me again as he sinks to his knees as he slides the shorts down my legs, throwing them aside before his gaze finds mine and I’m having to bite my lip at the sight of Emmett on his knees for me. His strong hands grip my hips as he begins nosing at my thighs, lips ghosting over them and teeth grazing until he’s nudging my legs apart enough blow cold air over my slickness, making me gasp and squirm. Before I can say or do anything those skilled lips are kissing my folds, nose bumping my clit before he licks a confident stripe up, gauging my reaction. His tongue flutters against my clit before he’s eating me like a starved man, hands gripping my hips tight enough that I can’t wriggle away from the pleasure. 

My hand is gripping his hair, the other bracing myself against the counter as he moans, sending vibrations through that oversensitive bundle of nerves. He’s dipping his tongue in and out of my core with precision and sloppiness before he moves back to my clit, my body trying to jerk away but his grip is tight enough to promise bruises and fuck that just makes everything more intense. All too soon I can feel myself starting to pulse around his tongue that hasn’t stopped fucking into me and my hands tugs almost painfully at his hair while my head falls back with a whine, my thighs trying to clamp around Emmett’s head as my vision partially whites out and all I hear is white noise, unsure if I’m crying out Emmett’s name. 

“Emm, fuck Emmett, too much.” I’m begging and he finally pulls back, looking up at me with half-lidded eyes and he looks fucking dirty, his mouth and chin shiny with my juices and his golden eyes have darkened even more. His thumbs caress my hips as he pulls himself to his feet moving to kiss me with a cheeky grin when I lightly push his face away saying, “No, clean your face first.” 

“I do believe a shower was suggested.” He agrees and I’m nodding, tugging at his shirt to which he complies, pulling it over his head and I can’t help wet my lips at how good he looks. Sure, I’ve seen Emmett change but this is different, he’s baring himself for me and me alone. His shirt reveals his chiseled abs and braid chest, my eyes roaming over his muscular physique with appreciation. His defined biceps and broad shoulders are evidence of the immense physical strength he possesses and the way his tone torso tapers down to his waist makes me want to run my hands over his hard body. As he undresses further, my gaze is drawn to his thick thighs, my heart racing against as he’s straining against his boxers and fuck, he is in no way small. The boxers barely able to contain him, the angry red head slipped past the waistband, precum wetting his v-line a little, “Come on lovely, eyes up here.” 

I tear my eyes away from his enticing bulge, feeling heat rising to my cheeks at being caught. But I can't help the desire that courses through me as I watch him step out of his boxers, completely naked before me. My heart is pounding in my chest, and I can feel the anticipation building between us as we move towards the shower. As we step under the warm water, Emmett pulls me close, his hands roaming over my wet skin as we continue to explore each other's bodies. I know this is only the beginning, and I can't wait to see what other surprises Emmett has in store for me.

-----------

Twilight Masterlist

[janeyseymour]

Your Song

a sweet one shot based on Elton John's Your Song. Attached is my own version of it, if you wanted to give it a listen!

WC: ~1.95k

Melissa is sitting next to you as the two of you soak up the sun in the Summer morning. You both have your cups of coffee, waking up with the sun and the world around you, not quite used to sleeping in just yet. You have your guitar with you, and you’re strumming little tunes and fingerpicking different licks that feed your heart and your soul as she watches you in awe. And then something happens, and you begin to play a tune that you really haven’t played in a while. You sing it in earnest as your heart swells with love for the woman beside you. She has a gentle hand on your knee, and she squeezes it gently when you sing the first line of one of her favorite songs.

It’s a little bit funny, this feeling inside… I’m not one of those who can easily hide.

You remember when you first realized that you had feelings for the redhead who worked in the room next door to you. It was… unpredictable to say the least. And once you realized that, you did everything you could to hide those feelings for her. You were shocked that you were able to because well… you weren’t someone who could usually hide.

It took you months to confess your feelings to the redhead, when she was speaking of finally getting herself back out there, and you couldn’t hold back anymore.

“Just one date with me,” you blurted out before you could stop yourself. “Just one. And if it doesn’t work… it doesn’t work.”

She took you up on that offer, and here you were- three years later and married. You never thought you would get a chance with the absolutely stunning woman that was Melissa Schemmenti, but here the two of you were with shining diamonds on your fingers and the change in your last name to show for it. You haven’t been happier, and Melissa hasn’t been happier either- Barbara has attested to that too, so you know its the truth. 

I don’t have much money, but boy if I did- I’d buy a big house where we both could live.

As two teachers working in center city Philadelphia in an underfunded and poorly run school, you weren’t rolling in dough- even though the redheaded second grade teacher has been with the district for over two decades and has unofficial tenure.

But the two of you have spoken about moving out of your tiny little townhouse and upgrading to a big house. One where the two of you could live, and you think you might have convinced her at this point to have at least one child of her own.

“I mean… I would love to have a little Schemmenti running around,” you admit shyly as your curled up on the couch one night. You’re watching some movie where the main character is pregnant, and it makes you yearn for a child of your own.

“Y/N,” Melissa sighs as she looks at you. “I’m too old to have a baby.”

“But I’m not,” you tell her. “And… you’re so good with the kids at school, and I’ve seen the way that you go out of your way to make babies smile while we’re grocery shopping.”

Your wife purses her lips. “M-maybe. But I have to think on it.”

You give her your best puppy dog eyes.

“If we can get the money for a nice house and to afford IVF… I don’t think it’s off the table.”

You made her pinky swear that if you ever had the money and you were still at the age where you could bear a child, the two of you would go through with it. After that, you got a job at the local diner waitressing on Sundays. She hates it because it steals you from her, but she always comes in to visit you and keep you company. The money that you make immediately goes into a jar that has the words ‘Future’ written on it in your loopy handwriting.

So excuse me forgetting, but these things I do… You see I’ve forgotten if they’re green or they’re blue. Yours are the sweetest eyes I’ve ever seen. Who are you kidding? You could never in a million years the beautiful shade of green that your wife’s eyes are. They were the first thing you noticed when you met her five years ago. She didn’t believe you when you told her that.

“Was it my boobs?” she chuckles on your third date. 

You roll your eyes. “Your eyes. They’re… mesmerizing. I saw the way that they sparkled when you were talking about your kids or someone you loved, and I was determined to make your sweet eyes sparkle like that… did I succeed?”

“I would say so,” she smirks as she leans in to kiss you.

“Good,” you mumble against her lips. “They’re gorgeous, you know.”

“My eyes?” the redhead practically swoons.

You see your opportunity, and you run with it. “No. Your boobs,” you deadpan.

She smacks you on the arm playfully, and you put your arms up in defense. “Hey! I was joking!”

Since meeting her, you’re positive that her eyes are the sweetest ones you’ve ever seen. They’re so… expressive. You can see in her beautiful eyes when she loves something or someone, and you consider yourself the luckiest woman alive to be able to get to see them every morning when you wake up.

And you can tell everybody this is your song. It may be quite simple, but now that it’s done- I hope you don’t mind, I hope you don’t mind that I put down in words how wonderful life is now you’re in the world.

You didn’t even really mean for this Elton John to turn into your song, but it did. You were just playing around on the guitar that she keeps in her classroom while you waited for her to finish up dismissal duty for the day.

If you’re being quite honest, you forgot that you even knew you could play that song until you heard it on the radio in her car this morning. So, after a few misfired chords, you begin to play and lay your voice over the simplistic yet stunning chords.

She comes in, ready to head out for the night, when she sees you sitting up on her counter, criss crossed and with the stringed instrument in hand. And then she hears your voice. And she can’t do anything but lean against the doorframe and listening to your soft and angelic voice.

When you fire out the last chord, she starts clapping softly from where she stands, and it startles you. You immediately turn red upon seeing her. 

"I didn’t know you play,” Melissa says softly as she comes in.

“I dabble,” you shrug as you put her guitar back where it lives.

She furrows her brows. “I wouldn’t call that dabbling. How long you been playing?”

“Since I was thirteen,” you shrug. “My dad taught me basic chords, and I just picked up the rest.”

“Well, you’re damn good. And I love that song.”

“I do too.”

“Play it again for me when we get to my place?” she asks as she grabs your bags.

You do, and she sits and watches, mesmerized.

“Those words are true, you know,” you say softly. “Life is wonderful now that you’re in the world… my world.”

She kisses you gently as she wraps her arms around your waist. “It’s like I see in technicolor now.”

If I was a sculptor, but then again, or a man who makes a position in a traveling show. I know it’s not much, but it’s the best I can do. My gift is my song, and this one’s for you.

“Do you ever think we would be better off if we weren’t teachers? Or at least one of us wasn’t?” you ask Melissa.

“What do you mean?”

“I mean like… if I was a sculptor, or… someone who makes potions in a traveling show,” you sigh softly. “Like in our song… maybe then we could have a big wedding.”

Your fiancée rolls her eyes as she pauses making dinner to wrap her arms around you. “I think that we both love teaching, and I think that I love this little life of ours, and I wouldn’t change it for the world.”

“I just… I know it’s not much,” you frown slightly. “We could be so much better off.”

“We’re doing the best that we can do, and that’s more than enough for me,” Melissa promises you as she kisses your cheek. 

“I know that’s what you say, but-”

“If you were a sculptor or a man who made potions in a traveling show, I would never see you,” she says softly. “Being on the same schedule is really nice.”

You smile a bit sadly. “I just wish that-”

“I don’t wish for anything else… we have a perfect life,” Melissa promises you. “Besides, you know I don’t want a big wedding- having just our Abbott family and our families.”

“A-are you sure?”

“As long as I have you, it’s enough,” the redhead kisses you softly.

And you can tell everybody this is your song. It may be quite simple, but now that it’s done- I hope you don’t mind, I hope you don’t mind that I put down in words how wonderful life is now you’re in the world.

Your big day has arrived, and as of an hour ago, you are officially Mrs. Y/N Schemmenti. After a simple ceremony in the courtyard at the school, the place that brought the two of you together in the first place, you move the ‘reception’ over to Barbara’s house.

Your wife had insisted on making all of the food for the party, and by some grace of God, the task at hand was completed last night. Barb spent this morning decorating and giving Gerald detailed instruction of how to lay it out so it was ready for when you all got to the Howard household before heading out to witness the two of you tie the knot.

When you get there, it’s beautiful- more beautiful than you had expected. There’s a stunning balloon arch, a garden of flowers, pictures of the two of you, and a few tables set up perfectly.

Your eyes well, as much as you will them not to. “How did we afford all of this?” you whisper to Melissa.

“We didn’t.” You look over at her, and her eyes are shining with tears too. “Barb?”

“The Abbott crew threw it together for our two favorite teachers,” the kindergarten teacher smiles. “Go on.”

Mr. Johnson announces the two of you in with the most sincerity that you’ve ever heard from him before he says softly, “And for your first dance…”

He hits play on the phone that is connected, and the familiar melody melts over your body as you pull your wife in close.

The Abbott clan and your families watch as the two of you sway back and forth, dancing together as a married couple for the first time. Barbara films it, tears of happiness falling down her cheeks.

“I hope you don’t mind… I hope you don’t mind, that I put down in words… how wonderful life is, now you’re in the world,” you sing to her softly as she rests her head on your shoulder. 

Life has been strange up until this time in your life, and you’ve had your doubts about love and life before… but with Melissa Schemmenti by your side? Life is wonderful. 

[nicromancytarot]

3 OPPORTUNITIES TO MAKE THE MOST MONEY, WHICH ONE WILL YOU PICK???

This is a general reading based on a collective of people. Take what resonates and leave what doesn’t. If you don’t feel the pile resonates with you, don’t be scared to try another, if it still doesn’t feel right, that’s ok! Maybe our energies aren’t as connected and my readings are not for you.

I do these strictly for fun and educational purposes. I don’t change for these readings and I do not fake readings. I would tell you the cards I got but I pull like 20-30 cards each reading and that just slightly a strenuous task to write them all down lmao.

PICK A CARD READING

I asked my spirit guides what 3 opportunities coming into your life would give you the best and most successful financial abundance, pick a pile to find out.

Pile 1 ———> Pile 2 ———> Pile 3

PILE 1

1) Office/corporate job.

This will unfortunately be a place of unhappiness for you, you may feel as though you always have to keep your guard up to protect yourself from your colleges. This is certainly a workplace where you will have to work with others and contribute to the working aspect of it, but you may not feel safe or comfortable around some of the other people. This is most likely due to the fact that this is showing to be a workplace in which everyone is pushing each other out of the way in hopes to reach the top, but so many fall from the climb.

The reason I believe spirit is saying that it’s a good place for financial opportunities is because it truly does pay very well, the only downside being the people and environment you have to work with. You may feel as though you cannot leave this job due to the money and may feel oppressed by it.

ADVICE: Focus on your mental health before caring for others, give yourself a pat on the back for being able to deal with this situation and start by healthily and safely moving away from this.

2) Building a business or partnership.

It will be a risky jump at first and may even make you wonder if it’s worth it at the start - it very much will be so continue, persevere and do not give up. This will give you the best financial opportunity out of the three and I see the money rolling in quickly with the ace of wands. You will be able to share this money with those you love and even have the ability to flaunt it as you please.

To do this opportunity you will need to leave whatever current situation you are in at this moment. It will appear scary at first but it will become an uphill climb and you will reach it to the top.

ADVICE: Before starting this business or partnership you will need to take some time to clear any debts you have, ensure you will not have to deal with them after embracing this opportunity and make sure it is all taken care of prior to this new beginning.

3) Relationships.

I see you getting into a relationship with someone who will give you the opportunity to either work alongside them or allow them to supply for you. They have enough money to sustain the both of you, and even a family if needed. This is truly up to you and you will not feel financially burdened by them with whatever decision you make.

I do however unfortunately see this being a short-lived situation (around 2-3 years.) There will be an end to this relationship and at that point if you haven’t already, you will need to begin finding ways to make your own money. There will be a short period of stress and stagnancy at the beginning of the end of this relationship, but you will make it out unscathed.

ADVICE: Use manifestation and prayer to your advantage, God, spirit or source are always listening and are ready to give you the treatment you deserve, do not be shy of asking for help.

PILE 2

1) Humanitarian work, turned fame.

I see you working alongside charities or advocating for humanitarian causes. I’m being shown someone who is giving their everything while not expecting anything in return. With the knight of swords I notice a person leading a protest and it truly looks and feels like they are making an anticipated difference. Your angels, God or the universe is seeing this and preparing a reward for your hard work.

Unfortunately there will be a short time filled with gossip and hate, I see this reaching the media and that is what will fuel people to talk bad on you and what you are doing. Do not let this get you down because this will bring good karma your way and you will receive abundance in all forms, I see someone who is now able to spend money on what they want while still helping out with these important causes and spreading the word around the world.

This energy is so powerful, with the lovers I can tell that you, my pile 2 are destined to do this and to take this path. Your voice and your influence is sure to change the world, it will make people open their eyes up to the important things and you will be noticed for making the world a better place.

ADVICE: Visualise abundance in all forms, you guys are extremely talented at bringing your visualisations to life so use this ability to bring the most positivity and money your way.

2) Lawyer/place of law, defamation, lawsuit, divorce.

I know this doesn’t seem very positive in itself but I see many ways of this playing out for you. In some cases it may be that a few of you are becoming lawyers or even judges, if so I see this bringing in a windfall of abundance and you will once again be gaining money for imposing justice on those who have suffered injustice.

For those of you who don’t resonate with that, I see you going through some troublesome time with the law, I don’t see it being that serious but it would make sense having the fact that you guys are my famous pile. There’s something to do with either a tricky divorce, a lawsuit or a defamation case. Luckily, I do see you guys winning this and gaining a lot of money from it whatever it is. Weirdly enough I do notice you possibly meeting someone who could turn into a romantic partner in the future while in this place LMAO.

ADVICE: Let the lawyers deal with this issue, do not try to chase anything, you may get yourself in trouble. For those of you who are the lawyers/judges, continue what you’re doing, don’t doubt yourself.

3) Partnership or collaboration with friends.

For the time it would last it can definitely bring in a lot of money. I do feel as though the downfall would be caused by some type of betrayal or just an argument between friends. At the time of the end you will feel very trapped and not very sure what to do next and may even end up hoarding the wealth you have made.

Once this period is over, I notice that you will either begin working on this project by yourself or scrap it to create something new. I will not sugarcoat it for you - both of these decisions have the same fait, they either turn out to be very successful and bring in a lot of extra money, or they fail completely. Take some time to think what you want before rushing into anything.

ADVICE: Let go of guilt, there is no need for you to feel guilty for something ending, you can always try again or make it better, don’t be so hard on yourself.

PILE 3

1) Entertainment or public speaking.

This first opportunity is divinely picked, even if you decide not to do this for money, you will be doing it nonetheless (money is just an extra bonus.) I got the 10 of pentacles in two decks and the 9 of pentacles as well so I think we can both notice the amazing financial opportunities this can bring.

This will lead you to be very vulnerable and open, expressing your emotions and talking about past experiences. When doing this reading I had an urge to use one of my more “taboo” decks so I assume this has to do with something that a lot of people would frown upon. This could show as expressing mental struggles through music or even talking about trauma as a stand up comedian for example.

ADVICE: Use manifestation and prayer to your advantage, God, spirit or source are always listening and are ready to give you the treatment you deserve, do not be shy of asking for help.

2) Charity work + relationships.

I see that you’ll start some type of work just for the sake of helping others. This will bring in much manifested abundance in all forms. You will feel very shut off to the idea of other people helping you out and you may refuse help from others during this time.

A relationship or perhaps job offer will come your way, this will bring great teamwork and abundance. I feel at the start of this opportunity you will try your best to balance these two things, but will inevitably come to the realisation that you cannot have everything at once and will end up needing to choose one while losing and letting go of the other.

ADVICE: Make a gratitude list for both of these things, which one makes you the the most grateful? Perhaps that the one you must continue on the path of.

3) Spiritual work/healing.

There’s energy of you tapping into the 4D and learning that you can manifest whatever you please while also continuing to help other people on this journey. There could be a sense of working with past lives and alongside your spiritual gifts, maybe even helping people with shadow work.

Another very destined path, I feel this would treat you very well and help you gain a large sum of money along the way. This will however become very time consuming and you will need to stay very motivated and focused.

ADVICE: Don’t shy from asking for help when you need it. Always have courage and do not give up.

[bluejutdae]

One way emotion | Bang Chan

Notes: back at it with some Chris angst. Have fun :)

Warnings: toxic exes, sort of toxic Chan, sort of unreciprocated love, angst.

The bass from the party is still hurting your ears as you stumble out into the cool night air. The alcohol is still buzzing in your veins, making the world spin slightly. The cool hair makes you shiver but maybe it’ll help in trying to shake off the sense of discomfort that has been your companion all night. But it’s not the party that had you on edge; it was him.

Chris. Your ex boyfriend, Chris.

You knew he would be here, but you relied on the size of the house and the number of people present to avoid him. But fate is cruel, and he was always easy to find for you, a beacon that catches your eyes and your heart, no matter how much you wish it wouldn’t.

His presence is like a weight on your chest, pressing down on the raw wounds that haven’t yet healed since you broke up, and yet you danced around all night, like moths around a flame.

Your break up wasn’t a clean break, nothing between you and Chris ever was. Your relationship has been a mess of late night arguments, miscommunication, and hurt feelings. But there has also been love, at least from your side. So much love that it has almost burned you alive. You haven’t spoken in months,though, not since the last time you finally said enough was enough. But seeing him tonight is unraveling everything.

You’re not sure how long you’ve been standing outside, lost in your thoughts, when you hear the noise of steps behind you.

“Can we talk?” Chris’ voice is low, hesitant, almost like he isn’t sure he wants to talk.

“What’s there to talk about, Chris?”

“I just- I don’t like how we left things.”

You laugh a bitter laugh, shaking your head lightly. “You mean the screaming match in the middle of the street? That wasn’t our finest moment.”

“I just… I don’t want things to be like this between us.” Like this. Like, not talking. Like, not seeing each other. Like, crying yourself to sleep because the empty place he left behind is swallowing you whole. Does he cry himself to sleep too?

“And how exactly do you want things to be, Chris?”

He doesn’t answer immediately. He stares at his feet as the cool air of the night is still around you both. “I don’t know. I just- I miss you.”

The admission hangs between you, heavy and charged with everything that has gone unsaid for so long. It would be so easy to let yourself believe him. But you know better. You know what happens when you let yourself hope.

“You don’t miss me. You should have been there to really grow accustomed to me and, now, miss me.”

“That’s not fair.”

“Isn’t it?” You take a step closer to him, voice trembling with the effort of holding tears back. “You don’t get to show up out of nowhere and say you miss me, Chris. You don’t get to do that after everything we’ve been through.”

He doesn’t say anything for a moment, then, with a resigned sigh he nods. “You’re right. I don’t. But it doesn’t change the fact that I miss you.”

“I don’t know what you want from me,” it’s clear you are on the verge of crying, it can be heard in your voice.I don’t know either,” he admits. “I just- I want to be close to you.”

Those words finally break you. The one thing you always craved from him is the one thing he has never been able to give you. He has always kept you at arm’s length, always just out of reach, always an afterthought, always less important than work. “We can’t do this again. We’re bad for each other.”

He doesn’t argue with you because he knows it’s true. But instead of walking away, instead of leaving you alone like you know he should, he closes the distance between you. And before you know it, you’re leaning into him.

“Just for tonight,” he murmurs.

You know you should say no. But the need is too deep. So, you nod, and that’s all it takes for him to close the gap between you, his lips crashing against yours in a desperate kiss.

The kiss is rough, messy, full of teeth and tongue. It isn’t gentle, it isn’t sweet. It’s a fight, a struggle for survival that neither of you ever really wins.

Before you know it, you’re in his car. The leather seats cold against your skin as you tug at each other’s clothes.

The sex is intense as always, all consuming, leaving you breathless and aching in the best way possible. But when it’s over, when the rush fades and reality sets in, you’re left with that same hollow feeling in your chest, the same emptiness that has been there all along.

As you sit there in the backseat, both your breathing heavy, you know nothing has changed. Chris is silent beside you, his arm draped over his eyes, as if he can’t even bear to look at you. You want to say something, to ask him what he’s thinking, but you don’t know if you really wanna know the answer.

You want to tell him that you love him, that you always have, but the words are stuck in your throat, choking you.

So you say nothing, letting the silence create an ever bigger distance between you two. The truth is, Chris won’t stay. He never does. And you will be left alone again, trying to piece together the fragments of your heart, knowing that no matter how hard you try, you will never be able to forget him.

Because, again, the truth is, you don’t want to. You love him, even if he doesn’t love you like you do. And that is the most painful part of all.

As you fix your clothes, bitter tears finally come. Chris doesn’t reach out to comfort you, doesn’t hold you the way you wish he would. He just lays there, his breathing slow and steady, as if he is already a million miles away.

And you know that this is the end. Not the end of your story, but the end of the hope that has kept you holding on for so long. There is no future for you and Chris, no happy ending. Just this: meaningless sex in the dark, followed by the cold reality.

[nvrsaidiwasinurcloset]

Here With Me - Ethan Landry x Fem!Reader

hi!!! i wanted to request an ethan x fem!reader fic with some fluffy smut.

I was thinking along the lines of the friends to lovers trope: just a lot of mutual pining and sexual tension that’s built up over the friendship, which all comes to a climax (get it? 😅) when they break the tension and finally sleep together and admit feelings.

Please and thank you!!!! 😊

I didn't know my anon requests weren't on, they are now:)

Ethan Landry x Fem!Reader

This contains SMUT - Minors DNI

Summary: A rainy day leads you confessions with your best friend.

You and Ethan have been friends for years. He’s always there for you, you’re always there for him. You have movie nights on a weekly basis, if not multiple times a week. You’ve spent so much time with him lately that you don’t really have any time left to find someone to have a romantic relationship with. Sometimes you miss sex, sometimes you miss waking up next to someone, but that bond you have with Ethan, and the time you get to spend with him, overpowers any of your other wants. You’d been hoping that Ethan could be your best friend and boyfriend in one, but you haven’t had the courage to make a move. You two flirt with each other all the time, but you couldn’t shake the thought that he only did it because he had no one else, while you did it because you were head-over-heels in love with him.  

It started to rain as Ethan walked you back to your apartment. It felt amazing on the hot summer day, and you both didn’t care that you were getting soaked. You both laughed at each other’s appearance; his hair slightly less fluffy, and your mascara running down your face. As the rain got heavier, you decided to try to wait it out under a huge oak tree.

“Maybe we should just go to my apartment, it’s closer,” he suggested, the rain showing no signs of letting up.

“I don’t want to walk in the rain, though,” you sighed.

A mischievous smirk appeared on his face, as he scooped you up in his arms, and ran with you through the rain. It was only a block to his apartment, but it seemed like those gym sessions with Chad were starting to pay off. That boy carried you with ease, up to the main door to his building.

“Put me down!” you laughed, as he tried to still hold you and enter the code for his door.

“No, I think this is where you need to be,” he smiled, as your eyes connected. You saw something in them that you’d seen several times before, but you’ve never been able to figure out what it means.

Once you were inside of his apartment, he gently sat you down on your feet. You gave him a light shove for causing you to get even more soaked by the rain, as he plastered a fake-hurt expression on his face.

“Do you want some clothes to change into? I can put yours in the dryer,” he said, as he walked towards his room to change out of his wet clothes.

“Yes, please,” you said, walking into him putting on a dry shirt. You caught a glimpse of his abs. Yep, the gym has been good to him.

He grabbed a pair of sweatpants for himself and you and gave you a huge T-shirt to wear.

After you both had changed, you decided to go to the living room and watch a movie. It was scary, of course, and filled with many jump scares. You jumped in his lap at one point as the villain of the movie popped on the screen, the loud sounds adding to the jump scare. Ethan looked down at you, smiling. He noticed the paths that the raindrops took your mascara on, the way your eyes got big once the music sped up as someone was being chased, the way your lips looked like they’d fit perfectly with his.

“Did you see that shit?” you yelled, after the most gore-filled scene in the whole movie played out in front of you.

“No, I missed it,” he laughed a little, glancing back at the screen.

“How did you miss that? It was crazy!” You said, eyes still glued to the screen.

He noticed that you still hadn’t moved off of his legs. He was enjoying the feeling, too scared that if he moved, you would too.

You turned your head away from the screen, another horrific death scene playing out. Ethan looked down at you, and that’s when you realized that you still had the mascara dried on your cheeks. You tried to wipe it away with your hands, a grin playing on his lips.

“Why didn’t you tell me this was still on my face? I’ve been sitting here looking stupid for the last hour,” you laughed, as he frowned at your words.

“You don’t look stupid, you look beautiful,” your heart started to race, so you tried to play it off.

“Oh yeah, I’m sure I look beautiful with these streaks all over my cheeks,” you said, but he had that same look on his face as earlier, the one you can’t figure out.

“You’re always beautiful. It doesn’t matter if your makeup is messed up. It doesn’t matter if you’re drenched in the rain. Fuck, you could walk in here wearing a trash bag and I’d still think you were the most beautiful person I’ve ever seen.” he said, as he started to turn red at his own words. He meant everything he said, but he didn’t know how you’d feel about it.

“Well, if you feel that way, kiss me,” you said, as his eyes darted between your eyes and your lips. He hesitated, and you started to think that he might think you’re beautiful, but that doesn’t mean he’s interested. “…or not…” you trailed off, sitting up so you were no longer on his legs.

“No, wait,” he said, pulling you back to where you were before. He leaned down, placing a kiss to your lips.

As both of your mouths moved together, he started to get hard. You could feel him through his sweatpants. Your hands roamed his body, as his roamed yours, but he pulled away. You were confused, he seemed as into this as you were.

“I need to tell you something,” he said, distracting himself from your stare with the tv.

“What?” you asked, your hand reaching for his face, turning it towards you.

“I’m in love with you, always have been,” his words flew out of his mouth at a quick speed, you almost didn’t catch what he said.

“You’re in love with me?” You asked, smiling at him. He nodded, a small grin playing on his lips. The relief of you knowing his biggest secret lifting a huge weight off his chest.

“I’m in love with you too,” you said, pulling him back down to continue. This kiss felt a lot different than the other one. You could feel the love and didn’t question the intentions when his hands started to roam your body again.

You reached down to touch him through the sweatpants, him grunting into the kiss as you rubbed him. His hands went to the bottom of his shirt that you were wearing, lifting it up. Once he got it over your head, his eyes glanced down to your bare chest. He stared for a few seconds.

“My bra is in your dryer, remember?” you giggled, as he kissed down your neck. His hands roamed your chest, just like he’d fantasized about many times before. The sighs falling out of your mouth every time his hand over one of your nipples made him even harder. His hand trailed lower and lower down your body, rubbing you through the sweatpants.

“Fuck, that feels good,” you whispered. His hand moved back up a little, his fingers tugging at the waistband.

“My panties are in the dryer, too, by the way,” you whispered, his blown-out pupils connected with yours.

“You sure you’re okay with this?” he whispered.

“Ethan, if you don’t touch me, I’ll explode,” you laughed, as you took his hand, sliding it under the waistband.

His fingers wandered the new territory, especially your clit. The way your back arched when he brushed it over made him wonder what other reactions he could get out of you. He trailed his fingers a little lower, sliding one of them inside of you, before adding another. You’d been touch-starved for so long that it was hard to control yourself. He pulled his hand out of your pants, hooking your legs around his waist. He stood up with you wrapped around him, walking you to his room. Your lips were connected; your bare chest pressed against his clothed one. He tossed you on his bed, then pulled the sweatpants off you. He’d imagined you naked in his bed many times, but this was better than he ever thought it could be.

“You’re beautiful,” he whispered, placing kisses up your thighs.

Once his mouth connected with your clit, you made eye contact. Your mouth fell open as he circled the bundle of nerves with his tongue. He was intently watching you as your breathing got heavier, and your whines got louder.

“I need you inside of me,” you moaned out, his hard cock still confined to his sweatpants. He slid them down his legs, grabbing a condom out of the top drawer beside the bed. He put it on, and wasted no time slowly sliding inside of you.

He took it slow at first, before you really wanted him to pick up the pace.

“More,” was all you could get out. He started to thrust faster, letting a few moans fall out of his mouth.

“I have an idea,” he grunted, before stopping his movements. He pulled out, and walked to his closet. He grabbed another pillow out and walked back over towards you.

“Lift your hips for me, baby,” he said, as he put the pillow underneath you.

He quickly slid back inside you, the new position helping him hit that special spot inside of you.

“Oh my god,” you moaned, feeling your orgasm building. One of your hands traveled down to your clit, rubbing it quickly as you chased that high.

Once you started to squeeze around him, he was a moaning mess. It was hot to see him let his noises go.

“Fuck, I’m gonna cum,” he said, thrusts becoming more erratic.

He slid out of you and disposed of the condom, then snuggled up next to your naked body.

“That was better than I ever imagined,” he said, his fingers lazily tangling with yours.

“I agree,” you said. He started to smirk.

“You’ve thought about us doing this before,” he asked.

“Yeah, but my vibrator does nothing compares to this,” you said with a laugh.

“I love you,” he whispered.

“I love you, too.”

[ineffablelunatics]

The Good Place and Crowley

A while ago, someone sent an ask to Gaiman. It went as follows, “In the book, ‘Golden Girls’ was Crowley’s favorite TV show. Is that slo TV Crowley’s favorite or does he have a current TV show that he prefers?” He answered, “I think he’d love the ‘The Good Place.’”

The Good Place is one of my favorite shows. I completely understand why Crowley would like it. It has some of the best debates of the philosophy and ethics of modern day society including the afterlife. It argues that people should not be defined as good and bad. It shows that people can improve. It tells us why and how they improve.

There’s two things about Crowley that really connect him to these thoughts. 1. Crowley does not like to be defined as good(or nice). Though we haven’t really seen that include bad, I would assume that it would be the similar thought. It also might have something to do with Aziraphale saying those things specifically, but that’s another post. 2. That people are not defined by what happened to them, and that means that anyone can improve.

Crowley fell from Heaven. He fell from grace which made him demon which means that for all intents and purposes, he should be evil. But he isn’t. Crowley doesn’t ever really commit truly evil acts. Any truly evil act that Hell thinks Crowley committed, humans committed. Crowley just took the credit. Crowley likes the thought that people can change. In Hell, he sees tons of people who are awful, but he also sees people who just made some mistakes. He sees demons who are like him who don’t find joy in treating people terribly. He’s seen angels causing harm happily, but others giving away joy like lollipops.

Those two things are fundamental in the show, The Good Place. I would argue Good Omens as well. If Adam had always been treated like he was evil, he probably would have never had friends who he genuinely cared about so much so that their fear pulled him out of his power drunken state. If Aziraphale had assumed the snake was evil(if he even saw him lol), then smited him, where would Crowley and humanity be? The demon with the imagination burned to ash and humanity living with almost decision-less whilst tucked neatly within Eden’s walls. If people couldn’t improve then Shadwell would have never been able to put aside his fears and foolishness so that he could love Madame Tracy and show it. Gabriel and Beelzebub would still be planning Armageddon 2.0 if they hadn’t moved on and fell in love instead.

The Good Place reminds us of the things time and time again. Each of the four main characters get reset, and every time, in the right circumstances, they always become better people. They are also never really defined as good and bad either. At times, others try to define Eleanor as a bad person, but every time, she reminds them that, yes, maybe, she shouldn’t be in the Good Place, but at the very least, she should be in her very own Middle Place. Every time, Chidi teaches her how to become a better person(which only works, because she wants to be one) and in the process, he becomes one too. Just like Gabriel and Beelzebub.

This was way longer than I expected it to be, but here are some quotes from The Good Place and where I think they would fit into Good Omens whether that be place and time or people and relationships.

“Sometimes, when you’re feeling helpless, the secret is to help someone else. Get out of your own head. Trust me. The next time someone asks for help, say yes.” This feels like the whole of S2, specially Aziraphale with Jim and then Maggie

“If you have bills to pay and shit to deal with you don;t have time or energy to become a better person.”  The Resurrectionists in 1827 with Elspeth and Wee Morag

“If there were an answer I could give you to how the universe works, it wouldn’t;t be special. It would just be machinery fulfilling its cosmic design. It would just be a big, dumb food processor. But since nothing seems to make sense, when find something or someone that does, it’s euphoria.” All the couples in GO, but that quote right there seems to be how Crowley and Aziraphale has been holding on for so long

“I guess all I can do is embrace the pandemonium find happiness in the unique insanity of being here, now.” Nina specially during The Ball

“People improve when they get external love and support. How can we hold it against them when they don’t?” Beelzebub and Gabriel

“We have no plan. No one’s coming to save us. So... I’m going to do it.” Aziraphale(specifically him at the end of S2 in my opinion)but also just everybody in S1 with Anathema, Agnus, the Them, Aziraphale and Crowley, just all trying their best

“If soulmates do exist, they’re not found. They’re made. People meet. They get a good feeling, and they get to work building a relationship.” All the couples, but especially Aziraphale and Crowley with the Agreement, they were working on their relationship before they knew they were even working on their relationship

“What matters isn’t if people are good or bad. What matters is if people are trying to be better today than they were yesterday. You asked me where my hope comes from? That’s my answer.” Crowley, because deep down, at the end of the line, we know that he’s an optimist

*reminder that all of this is my opinion, if there’s anymore quotes you would like to add, please do, some of the information might be incorrect

[sister-lucifer]

“Here’s What’s Gonna Happen.”

[short no context size kink drabble]

[unnamed male x male reader]

[tw: no smut but very suggestive/NSFW, size difference, intimidation, shy/innocent reader, pet names, a bit of force but not physical, the unnamed male is kind of a creep tbh but I’M into it.]

[IF YOU SEE ANY TYPOS PLEASE LET ME KNOW.]

IF YOU LIKE THIS POST, PLEASE REBLOG! It’s easy, free, and it’s a great way to show creators some love!

“Don’t look so scared, pretty boy,” he laughs, eyeing you up and down as you press your back into the wall. He resists the urge to run his tongue over his canines while you cower like a frightened bunny. 

He keeps his hands deep in the pockets of his open jacket, not wanting to make any sudden moves—at least not yet. He’s slouching on purpose as well, though it doesn’t really make that much of a difference when you can still tell that he could easily pick you up and run with you if he wanted, and the idea of your legs dangling uselessly in the air as he carries you off to god knows where makes the both of you shiver for different reasons. 

“I haven’t hurt you yet, have I, angel?” he says, letting the words come out slow as he takes the smallest step closer. You hesitantly shake your head. The way you look up at him through your lashes with those big, frightened doe eyes make him wanna jump you right here. You’re trembling now, and when he notices he can feel his cock twitch in his pants. 

You open your mouth to say something, but you don’t even get to stammer out a syllable before he cuts you off. 

“Shh, baby…’s okay. I just wanna, ah…get to know you better. You’re just so cute, can’t leave you all alone…” 

He steps a bit closer, and he doesn’t miss the way you gulp nervously. You barely come up to his chest, and his shadow is swallowing you whole now. The little whimper you involuntarily let out makes his stomach flip with excitement. 

“So damn precious,” he mumbles. His eyes don’t leave your face. 

He pulls one hand from his pocket slowly, biting back a smirk as he watches you tense, and then deflate with relief when you see his hand is empty. He brings it up to your face, relishing the way you flinch back despite having nowhere to go. 

The better part, though, is when you feel how gentle his touch is. 

Clearly you were expecting him to hit or grab you, something rough and forceful; instead, his fingers lazily brush over your cheek, and then his palm cradles your face. His hand feels huge against your head, and it’s warm and strong. 

He can’t stop himself from smiling at the way your demeanor changes. 

You instinctively lean into his touch ever so slightly, your lips pursed just a tiny bit. You’re not pouting per se, but it’s clear to him that your shy nature is battling with your need for affection. He imagines you as a kicked dog, begrudgingly wagging its tail for a good scratch behind the ears. 

He looks around for just a moment to double check that no one is around. When he’s confirmed that you’re alone, he leans down to your height to talk lowly in your ear. He doesn’t stop cradling your face. 

“Here’s what’s gonna happen,” he says, without any room for protest, “you’re gonna get in my truck. We’re gonna stop at the corner store. I’m gonna buy some smokes, maybe some booze, and whatever you want. Then you’re gonna go back to mine with me. Sound good?” 

He’s not really asking, that much is obvious. 

He stands back up, looking down at you once more as he awaits your answer. 

His grin nearly splits his face when you bite down hard on your bottom lip and nod. 

“That’s the right answer, pretty boy.”

Like my writing? I take requests! NSFW or SFW for any fandoms in my bio (request rules + masterlist in pinned post)!

Also, please reblog! it’s free, takes two seconds, and really helps me out. 

Feedback is encouraged and appreciated. 

[cherr-22]

TNGDH 37

The night was long as Kyle said.

All the liveliness of the marketplace disappeared the next night and it felt as if the winter’s cold hadn’t gone away.

The candles held in the children’s hands fluttered with the wind. Small sobs escaped from the mouths of people who were wiping away their tears in the dark.

It was a quiet night. The longing and cries that were buried during the day seeped out in the dark.

I looked straight ahead at Kyle, who had his eyes closed. Why did he look more solemn and pitiful than those who were crying?

It was a night where two hours felt like a whole day.

*

I sat in the hamster house and stared at the system window seriously.

Underneath the familiar signboard, [Love Love Corner~❤], were items lined up. The background, which was normally translucent blue, changed to pink.

‘Did it update? I don’t see any particular changes though.’

I flipped through the pages and the system popped up as if it had just woken up.

[(ˉ﹃ˉ)]

Hey, Hey. Stop sleeping. Did you stay up all night or something?

I’ve been thinking about it since before, but the system strangely mimicked people. Like being tired, or feeling angry or embarrassed.

‘Though it’s nice since it feels like I have company by my side.’

I laughed and the system blinked. It showed me a different emote.

[(づ￣//￣)づ]

An emote waving its hands towards one direction.

I looked at the direction it was pointing. There was a small banner and underneath that banner was an item.

‘You made a banner just for this one item?’

Why so flashy.

I narrowed my eyes and viewed the banner the system spent its entire night on making. If I didn’t, it felt like the system would feel disappointed in its wasted efforts.

Let’s see. Valen…….

―Squeak…… (Are you serious……?)

[Today is Valentine’s Day! Try sharing your love to your fated partner!]

Hey, this…….

I stared at the system window with a puzzled expression on my face. If you had the time to make something like this, you should’ve made something more useful! I didn’t give you Miracle Points just for you to do this!

I crossed my legs and pointed my finger at the system.

How about making cookies cheaper! You know how much I lost from buying so much this time!

[（＞人＜；）]

The system displayed an intimidated emote.

……Was I too harsh?

I felt a little bad as I saw it sweating profusely.

Alright. I’m thankful you put in a lot of effort just for me. Who knows. Maybe it’ll be something useful. It looks to be an item that goes into my inventory, so I could take it with me and use it whenever it’s necessary.

‘Let’s see what it is first.’

I read through the description of the item called [Almond Chocolate].

Made with the highest quality almonds and freshly squeezed milk, with cacao grown from the sunniest place…… okay, whatever. It’s delicious. As for its ability… [Makes the person who eats it feel happy!].

―Squeak. (Come out.)

[ ε=ε=ε=┏(゜ロ゜;)┛]

I furiously kicked at the system window as it ran away. You’re telling me to pay 43 Hearts for something like this?

While I ran around the hamster house, the study door opened.

It was of course, Kyle.

He looked less tired than yesterday but still haven’t recovered fully yet. There didn’t seem to be any injuries.

I paused and called the system.

‘Hey, system.’

The system blinked with a [(⊙_⊙)？]. I took a deep breath and checked the remaining Hearts I had.

60 Hearts.

‘I’ll give you ten more, so can you add an extra chocolate option for me?’

It displayed an emote that looked like someone rubbing their chin. Where did it learn to do that? It hasn’t been long since it opened the store, yet it already became such a businessman.

‘It’s not a big deal. Just a fatigue recovery chocolate. I’m giving you extra Hearts for my request.’

I gave the system the puppy eyes. A nodding emote along with a [Loading……] sign came up.

Kyle walked over to me. I obediently climbed up onto his hand.

You must be very tired.

However, as the leader of the knights and the Grand Duke of the North, he couldn’t say a single word about how difficult and tiring it was.

That’s why, it’s times like this that I should…….

―…….

O-oh. Okay. Kiss me all you want. ……And stop eating my fur.

“You’re cute today too, Cashew.”

After kissing me for a whole ten minutes, Kyle reorganized my fur.

Somehow, I felt like my energy has been sucked out.

Maybe it’s because I haven’t received kisses like these for a while. Not only did they feel longer than usual, but I was also out of breath. I laid face down in his palm as if my soul was drained out.

Then, as if to comfort me, he shared some unexpected good news.

“You remember when I tried to inject something into your body? I apologize for what happened back then. That won’t happen again in the future. He told me that trying to force mana into your body could be bad for you.”

―Squeak squeak! (That’s right! You made the right choice!)

I jumped and sat up straight. Then, I patted his thumb with my small paw as if praising him. I’m so proud of you. You’re amazing. Listening to my words so well!

“You’re that happy? Besides your slow growth rate, there isn’t anything wrong with your body. Let’s wait a bit more and see. If anything does happen, we could always take you to the demonic beast specialist. No matter what, I’ll save you.”

I’m worried about your life, yet you’re worried about my own.

I turned around and checked the system window next to Kyle.

His lifespan had about a month and a half remaining.

I had no idea what remaining incidents were left for him, but I knew that there was one major event before the season was over.

*

“Ahem.”

I stood in front of Kyle’s door and cleared my throat.

Strangely enough, I always felt nervous whenever I stood before his room. The previous time I stood before his door, I felt nervous because I made a mistake, but today I just felt a little embarrassed.

The system worked faster than expected. In the 10 minutes it took Kyle to kiss me, they added an additional option in the store and raised the price.

Honestly, I wished the system had forgotten about the price raise, but there was a red line drawn across with the number 53 written next to it.

As a result, I only had 7 Hearts left. Once upon a time, I had over 100 Hearts……

This is all for Kyle. For Kyle.

I shook my head and knocked on the door lightly. Kyle’s voice was heard from inside, telling me to come in.

“It’s you.”

Kyle took off his glasses.

I walked over to his desk with the chocolate clenched tightly behind my back. He waited for me with a soft smile on his face.

Don’t smile like that. It’s making me feel strange.

I ignored the heat coming up to my ears and held out the box of chocolates to him. He obediently accepted it with a puzzled look on his face.

“What is this?”

“You will know once you open it.”

Kyle untied the beautifully wrapped pink ribbon and opened the box.

I didn’t look inside before giving them to Kyle, but there were round pink, white, and black chocolates filling the box with the center……

“…….”

“…….”

Hey. System.

Hey. Stop hiding from me.

“Did you make these yourself?”

“……Ah. Uh. Well. Yes. It just so happened…….”

Something was written on top of the large chocolate heart.

To my beloved Kyle, His Highness.

I felt like hitting my throbbing head a few times.

Why didn’t I check this beforehand. Why did I give him this. I should’ve seen what was inside before giving it to him!

My clenched fist trembled. Once I return, I will definitely get my revenge on the system. I’d only feel better once I either give it a premature death or grab it by its collar.

I wasn’t sure if Kyle understood my feelings properly or not, but he stared at the chocolates for a long time before picking up a round piece and putting it in his mouth.

“I had no idea you were good at making desserts too.”

“It just so happens that I’m good at various things.”

“But why the chocolate all of the sudden?”

“……From where I came from, today is the day where you give chocolates to someone you respect or are thankful for. It’s not a big deal, but I just remembered as I saw the calendar…… ah. It’s a traditional event passed down from generation to generation, so please take it.”

The situation was embarrassing, so I prolonged our conversation by rambling.

As soon as I finished my gibberish, he picked up another round chocolate and put it into my mouth this time.

“Then I must give one to you too. Today is February 14? I’ll keep it in mind from now on.”

“…….”

He laughed.

It was the most relaxed smile I’ve seen in a while. How can he smile so well when he looks colder than anyone else?

I relaxed my fist and squatted down. I heard the sound of a chair being pushed back, but I couldn’t raise my head.

Was there an effect in the chocolate that makes your heart beat? Or perhaps I was so embarrassed that I had arrhythmia.

I shut my eyes tight as I listened to my heart thump.

The chocolate he gave me melted in my mouth. It was so sweet that I started to feel strange.

Surely, it’s just the chocolate.

--------------------------------------------------------

Previous Chapter / Next Chapter

[pdriesta]

CHAPTER TWO

“how can i move on when i’m still in love with you”

genres — angst, angst, and more angst. suggestive.

word count —2.8k

summary — two years ago, pedri shattered his childhood best friend's heart by ending their relationship. he was her first kiss, first boyfriend, and first love. now, as she prepares to start fresh while pursuing her master's degree, pedri reappears with a single mission: to mend the heart he once broke. can she trust him again, or will their past define their future?

an — chapter two!! they are literally my babies

masterlist

you stood frozen in the doorway, staring at the familiar face you hadn’t seen in years. pedri’s eyes, those same deep brown eyes that once held your world, locked onto yours. he looked just as stunned as you felt.

“pedro?” your voice came out as a whisper, disbelief lacing every syllable.

“hi, y/n,” he replied, a nervous smile tugging at his lips. “can we talk?”

you blinked, trying to process his unexpected presence. “what are you doing here?” you finally managed to ask, your heart pounding in your chest. then it clicked. “did fer send you?”

he took a deep breath, his gaze never leaving yours. “he might have mentioned you were starting school in the city. congratulations, by the way. but i needed to see you, y/n. i know it’s been a long time, but i couldn’t let this chance slip by.”

you shook your head, memories of the past rushing back. “pedri, this isn’t a good time,” you said, your voice firm. but you didn’t have the heart to reject him. your heart still clenched at the sight of him, and your body craved to be near him. “but there’s a coffee shop around the corner. we can talk there.”

“okay, that works,” he said, nodding quickly. “lead the way.”

you grabbed your keys and phone, stepping out into the hallway and closing your door behind you. the walk to the coffee shop was silent, the air thick with unspoken words. you finally arrived at a small, cozy café and found a secluded corner table.

pedri was the first to break the silence. “i was planning to order. should i get you a macchiato? with caramel?” he remembered your favorite, of course he did. even though coffee was never his thing, he knew how much you raved about the drink and how many times he showed up at your door with it just to earn him a smile and a kiss.

“i actually don’t drink coffee anymore,” you stated, keeping your poker face. “i had to cut it out. it only worsened my anxiety,” your voice dropped, tinged with embarrassment.

pedri didn’t know what to say. he didn’t like the distant look you held on your face because it was unlike the vulnerable version of yourself he held and spoke through panic attacks with. how many had he missed? how bad had it gotten? the questions rested on his tongue, but he decided not to pry, even if that’s all he really wanted to do.

the silence was suffocating, making you feel even more self-conscious. “i do like matcha. maybe an iced matcha latte, please,” you politely spoke.

the whole interaction felt so foreign to pedri. between the two of you, you’d never been awkward around one another. your relationship grew so naturally and organically, where you could speak to each other about anything, even when life got busy.

“okay,” pedri offered you a smile before walking to the counter. surely, the patrons recognized him, which added to your nerves. you were already high-strung at seeing him unexpectedly, now you had to sit under the gaze of his fans.

once seated with your drinks, pedri looked at you with earnest eyes. you thanked him before taking a sip of your drink. “i’ve missed you, y/n. not a day goes by that i don’t think about you. about us. i made a mistake letting you go, and i’ve regretted it ever since.”

you took a deep breath, your guard still up. “pedri, it’s been years. we’ve both changed. our lives are different now. let’s not forget you are the one who broke up with me.”

“i know,” he said quickly, leaning forward. “but some things haven’t changed. my feelings for you haven’t changed. i wanted to tell you in person that i’m here, in barcelona, and i want to make things right. i want to make up for every day we’ve been apart.”

you shook your head slightly, struggling to keep your emotions in check. “pedri, it’s not that simple. you broke my heart. you don’t just get to show up and expect everything to be okay.”

“i know it won’t be easy,” he admitted, his voice earnest. “but i’m willing to try. i’m willing to do whatever it takes to prove to you that we can have a future together. please, just give me a chance.”

you looked into his eyes, seeing the sincerity and hope reflected there, but the pain from the past still lingered. “why now, pedri? why after all this time? we are so far from the people we were when we were teenagers.”

he sighed, running a hand through his hair. “because i realized that no matter what i achieve, it means nothing without you. the distance was an obstacle, but now we’re in the same city. i can’t let this opportunity slip by without trying.”

you bit your lip, torn between the walls you’d built and the part of you that still cared. “i need time to think, pedri. this isn’t something i can decide right away.”

“i understand,” he said softly. “take all the time you need. just know that i’m here, and i’m not going anywhere.”

you nodded slowly, feeling the weight of the conversation settle over you. “thanks for understanding. i should get back now.”

“of course,” he replied, standing up. “i’m just a call away if you want to talk more.”

as you walked back to your dorm, you couldn’t help but feel a mix of emotions. seeing pedri again had stirred up feelings you thought you’d buried, but you knew you had to protect your heart. only time would tell if you could ever let him back in.

after walking back to your dorm, you couldn’t shake the mix of emotions from your encounter with pedri. the sight of him, the tension between you, and the lingering feelings left you feeling overwhelmed. needing to talk to someone who might understand, you reached for your phone and dialed fernando’s number.

the call connected, and fernando’s face appeared on your screen, looking both concerned and surprised to see you calling. “hey, y/n. what’s up? is everything okay?”

you took a deep breath, struggling to keep your voice steady. “fer, i need to ask you something. why did you send pedri to my dorm? he showed up out of nowhere, and i don’t know what to do.”

fernando’s brow furrowed, and he looked genuinely puzzled. “i didn’t send him, y/n. i had no idea he was going to show up like that. but i’m glad you called. it sounds like you’ve had a rough day.”

“yeah,” you said, your voice trembling. “seeing him again… it brought up so many old feelings. i thought i was over him, but now i’m not sure. he’s still the same pedri who broke my heart, and yet… i can’t deny that part of me still loves him.”

fernando listened attentively, his expression softening as he processed your words. “it’s okay to still have feelings for him. emotions are complicated, and seeing someone who meant so much to you can stir up a lot of unresolved feelings. it’s clear you’re struggling with this.”

“it’s just hard,” you admitted, tears welling in your eyes. “i thought i’d moved on. i built a life without him. and now, with him showing up again, it feels like everything i’ve tried to forget is coming back.”

“y/n, i know it’s difficult,” fernando said gently. “but maybe this is an opportunity for you to address those feelings and decide what you want. if he’s really serious about making things right, you need to think about whether you’re willing to give him another chance.”

you nodded, wiping away a tear. “i’m just so confused. i don’t know if i can trust him again.”

“take your time,” fernando encouraged. “it’s okay to be cautious. just remember, you have every right to protect your heart. and if you ever need to talk or figure things out, i’m here for you.”

“thanks, fer,” you said, managing a weak smile. “i really needed to hear that.”

as you ended the call, you sat down on your bed, feeling a mix of relief and sadness. fernando’s words helped, but the emotional weight of the day was still heavy. you stared at the iced matcha latte pedri had left you, its presence a bittersweet reminder of the pas

pedri knew showing up at your dorm out of nowhere was a bad idea, but he couldn’t help himself. after speaking to your mom, fishing for any new information about you, he found out where you were staying. she even told him your exact dorm number. he felt a mix of excitement and nerves, knowing this was his chance to make things right. he had rehearsed what he wanted to say, but seeing you again had thrown him off balance.

when he knocked on your dorm door, he was met with the unexpected sight of you opening it while wearing just a tank top. he felt a rush of emotions, his heart pounding as he took in the sight of you. you looked effortlessly beautiful, even in such a casual outfit. it was clear that you had just been relaxing, and the flannel you pulled over yourself did little to hide the way you made his heart race.

pedri’s eyes lingered on you, and he could see the way his gaze made you shiver slightly. his mind raced with the realization of just how much he had missed you, how even the simplest moments were filled with a beauty he hadn’t truly appreciated until now. the contrast of your relaxed appearance against the seriousness of the situation only intensified his longing.

as he walked back to his own place, he couldn’t help but replay your conversation in his head. the look in your eyes, the guarded tone of your voice, the way you still affected him after all these years. he was determined to win you back, but he knew it wouldn’t be easy. the journey was just beginning, and he was willing to do whatever it took to prove his unchanging love for you.

the next day, you were rushing out of your dorm, already late for your first class, when you saw him standing there again. pedri, with a determined look on his face and your favorite iced matcha latte in hand. your heart skipped a beat at the sight of him, but you quickly steeled yourself, reminding yourself of the hurt you’d endured.

“good morning,” he greeted, holding out the drink. “i thought you might need this.”

you hesitated, glancing at the drink before meeting his eyes. “you didn’t have to do that,” you said, your voice clipped. “i don’t need your gestures, pedri.”

“i know,” he replied softly, not withdrawing the drink. “but i want to. i want to show you that i’m serious about making things right.”

you sighed, taking the drink from him reluctantly. “this doesn’t change anything,” you warned, taking a cautious sip. “we can’t just go back to how things were.”

“i understand,” he said, his eyes earnest. “but i’m here, and i’m not giving up. i want to earn your trust again, y/n.”

you looked away, the mix of emotions overwhelming you. “i’m late for class,” you said, trying to maintain your composure. “thanks for the drink, but don’t expect me to be waiting around for you.”

“i don’t expect anything,” he said quickly. “i just... want you to know that i’m here. whenever you’re ready.”

you nodded slightly, turning to walk away. “we’ll see,” you murmured, feeling the weight of his gaze on your back as you hurried off to class. the iced matcha latte in your hand felt like a tangible reminder of the past, and despite your best efforts to remain guarded, you couldn’t deny the small flicker of hope that he might truly be trying to make amends.

as you walked to class, you felt a familiar ache in your chest. the sight of him, the sound of his voice, the small gesture of your favorite drink—all of it brought back memories you’d tried so hard to bury. it was as if the wounds you thought had healed were being ripped open again.

you couldn’t help but remember the nights you cried yourself to sleep after the breakup, the way your heart shattered when he chose distance over you. it had taken everything in you to move on, to build a life without him. and now, here he was, stirring up all those emotions again.

tears pricked at the corners of your eyes as you quickened your pace, desperate to put some distance between you and the pain he brought back with him. the matcha latte, once a source of comfort, now felt like a cruel reminder of what you’d lost. you wanted to believe he had changed, that he was sincere in his efforts to make things right, but the fear of being hurt again was too overwhelming.

reaching your classroom, you took a deep breath and wiped away a stray tear. you couldn’t afford to let him see how much he still affected you. you had to stay strong, to protect your heart, even if it meant pushing him away. as you sat down and tried to focus on the lecture, the words seemed to blur together, overshadowed by the weight of your unresolved feelings. the sadness of seeing him again, coupled with the longing for what once was, felt like a heavy burden you weren’t sure you could bear.

after finishing all your lectures for the day, you were practically a zombie walking back to your dorm. the emotional turmoil from seeing pedri earlier in the day left you drained. stay strong, you reminded yourself; this is a stepping stone for achieving your dream. you breathed in and out, trying to push away the lingering ache in your heart. you were so exhausted you couldn’t even think about cooking or eating right now.

when you reached your dorm, you noticed a small delivery bag waiting at your door. your curiosity got the better of you, and you carefully opened it. inside was a neatly packed meal and a handwritten note.

you unfolded the note with trembling hands, your heart pounding as you read the familiar handwriting.

y/n,

i know it’s been a tough day, and i didn’t want to add to your stress. i hope this helps a little. i’m here if you need me.

— pedri

you stared at the note, the simple act of kindness making the lump in your throat tighten. you could feel tears welling up again, the pain and hope mingling in your chest. you’d told him not to expect anything, but here he was, showing up again and again, trying to make things right.

you sat on the floor, the food forgotten beside you, and pulled out your phone. you hovered over his contact, your finger hovering above the call button. your mind raced with memories of the past—of laughter, of love, and of the heartache that had followed. you remembered the warmth of his touch, the way he had made you feel special, and how it all came crashing down when he chose distance over you.

a part of you wanted to call him, to hear his voice and see if there was any chance of rekindling what you once had. but another part of you was terrified of getting hurt again, of opening yourself up to the possibility of more pain. you knew that trusting him again would require time and healing, and you weren’t sure if you were ready to take that leap.

you took a deep breath and stared at the phone, your emotions swirling in a chaotic mix of longing and fear. finally, you set the phone down, feeling a sense of resignation wash over you. it was too soon to make any decisions, and you needed more time to process everything.

as you slowly stood up, feeling the weight of the day pressing down on you, you glanced at the food and the note once more. the gesture of his continued efforts had left an indelible mark on your heart.

you resolved to take it one step at a time, to give yourself the space to heal and reflect. but just as you were about to walk away, a small voice inside you whispered that maybe, just maybe, you should give him a chance.

you hesitated, feeling the familiar ache in your chest. slowly, you picked up your phone again, your finger hovering over pedri’s contact. your heart raced as you considered the possibility of calling him, of hearing his voice once more.

finally, with a deep breath, you pressed the call button.

the phone rang once, twice, and then you heard his voice on the other end.

“hello?”

your breath caught in your throat as you tried to find your words. the decision had been made, but the uncertainty of what came next weighed heavily on you.

“pedri…” you finally managed to say, your voice trembling. “we need to talk.”

© PDRIESTA 2024