#so many moments of that fic have fucked me up
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sooo I’m doing it for @k-kizkhalifa :} Do you daydream a lot before you write, or go for it as soon as the ideas strike?
There are times when I daydream a lot about a certain idea, like for example about the one about pairing Ron with Blaise, but mostly it’s just a Boom! and if I don’t write it now, it’s dead and gone.
Where do you get your fic ideas?
I imagine my (as in “original but in my way” or headcanonly or au) characters during certain activities (mostly: fucking) and I add something or someone extra, or I set the scene right before or after - as it comes to me.
Do you share your fic ideas, or do you keep them to yourself?
I rarely have a big idea that is different than a shortie I am writing or wrote already, but in my head it’s like once I say it, it’s done and gone - so sharing is equal to abandoning it most likely forever
How do you choose which fics to write?
Since I don’t understand the question really I will try answering how I feel it: I choose just by how I feel about right now. When I think of Eomer, I write about Eomer. As simple as that.
How many wips do you have? What fandoms/pairings are they for?
GURL YOU NOT READY!
I have many wips, mostly of HP wizarding world, and probably sometime soon I will release another chapter of two halves of Draco’s broken wand and my favourite pairing there is Draco/Bill Weasley and Fred/George/Hermione and since it’s me, it’s going to be juicy as fuck. Literally.
What’s the last line you wrote?
“He’s a cuckoo”
Post a snippet from a wip.
Post an out-of-context spoiler from a wip.
Draco is being blackmailed and fucked by Bill Weasley
Does this word [chosen by asker] appear in your current wip?
Do you work on multiple wips or stick to one fic at a time?
M u l t i p l e
Do you write scenes in order, or do you jump around?
I truly have no idea what I’m doing
Do you outline your fics? If yes, how detailed are your outlines? How far do you stray from them?
It depends. For Lucy I invented a whole new interest and branch of magical creatures for Lucius to be interested in and for the moment I was even sad that I am doing all this work to finish it with some porn scene.
Do you listen to music while you write? If yes, what have you been listening to recently?
Rarely as I am bilingual and most of the music I listen to is English so I get distracted very easily
What is your favorite location and position to write in?
Any. Sometimes I park my car on my driveway and just START WRITING
What’s your favorite time to write?
Any. No particular favourite time. But I don’t like meal time to use on writing if I really must differentiate between this or that
Do you write by hand, on your phone, or on your laptop?
99% phone.
Do you have a writing routine?
I barely have any routines!
Do you enjoy research? Which fic of yours required the most research?
Research yes, sometimes a lot! But for a fic? They don’t require much researching… maybe just checking if I remember something correctly or not.
Do you enjoy creating OCs or do you prefer to stick solely to canon characters?
I like creating OCs based on characters from other fiction and I am not ashamed at all.
Do you prefer writing AUs or canon fics?
Asking that a guy who writes hardcore gay porn from Wizarding World…
Do you prefer writing chaptered fics or one-shots?
Why not both at once?
Do you title your fics before, during, or after the writing process? How do you come up with titles?
I hate titling!
Is writing the beginning, middle, or end of the story easiest? Hardest?
I never know how to end stuff. Ever. Anything. I have to force myself to shut the fuck up.
How do you choose whose POV to write in?
I don’t like POVs
What’s your favorite part of the writing process (worldbuilding, brainstorming/outlining, writing, editing, etc)?
The part when I am just a finger that clicks and my subconsciousness does everything else.
What’s your least favorite part of the writing process?
Making sure it all makes sense! Fuck. That!
What area of writing do you feel strongest in?
Area of writing? As in I AM A DIALOGUE MASTER and a little bitch for remembering what the fuck did I start with
What area of writing do you want to improve in?
I won’t improve in remembering so maybe I can start making sense more…?
What’s something about your writing that you’re proud of?
I can make literally anything about gay men crossdressing or women wearing high heels and sometimes I can even make them sassy. I am not proud of myself at all so whatever
How much do you edit your fics? Do you edit as you write or wait until you finish the first draft?
Wips are being edited hard, especially longshots. I write, I stop, I edit two weeks later, I write and so on and it all depends on my mood.
Do you use a beta reader/editor?
Only for bigger or more serious projects and even then extremely rarely because I don’t know anyone that committed to my writing or weird enough and with so much free time
Do you take fic requests? Why or why not?
I WOULD TAKE REQUESTS ANYTIME BUT BEAR IN MIND THAT I AM NOT VERY GOOD AND YOU WILL SUFFER A LOT OF GAYNESS AND WEIRD SEX IN THEM, hit me up only if you’re ready for some hardcore porn or smut or sass
Is there a specific word count that you hold yourself to/enjoy writing the most?
I never think of that
How much of your personal life/experience do you include in your fics?
Barely anything other than sass and heels and my own stupidity
What’s your favorite fic you’ve posted?
I am currently a fan of my short incorrect quotes, it’s my most recent and most read work on ao3.
What fic are you proudest of?
Two Halves of Draco’s broken wand maybe?
What fic has been the hardest for you to write?
WHAT IS WIP IS A WIP BECAUSE IT IS HARD FOR SOME REASON
What is your most self-indulgent posted story?
Everyone would want a friend like you
What’s your most self-indulgent wip?
all of them :>
What is your favorite world that you’ve created for a fic?
I honestly have no clue!
Who’s your favorite character you’ve written?
From a fic? I enjoy writing young Narcissa, but frankly speaking I loved writing young Lucius and adult Draco.
What’s your favorite title that you’ve come up with?
I hate titling! Next question!
Is there a trope or idea that you’d really like to write but haven’t yet?
Next question!
What is your favorite genre to write?
Genre… as in dialogue-based fantasy weirdness?
What genre/trope do you tend to write the most?
PORN
If you could only write one type of AU for the rest of your life, what would it be?
one type as in the one where guys that canonically don’t fuck all of the sudden do?
Is there a trope that you’ve written before but are now sick of?
naaah
Who is your favorite character to write for? Has this changed since you’ve started writing for that fandom?
my most favourite of all times character is Sam Vimes but I don’t want to write ff about him really that much
What fic of yours would you say is the best introduction to you as a writer?
oh geez if you really need to think of me as a writer, please don’t read my fanfics EVER, I am writing them for fun and for fun only
How would you describe your writing style?
Funny, weird and sometimes even full of meaningful connections between the characters
Does what you like to write differ from what you like to read?
I try to be as good as my favourite writers!
What’s the average word count of your fics?
as me if I care about the numbers again and I will start telling random things
What is the most-used tag on your ao3?
maybe… blow jobs? High heels?
What’s the fandom/pairing distribution of your posted fics?
Harry/Draco!
Have you noticed any patterns in your fics? Words/expressions that appear a lot, themes, common settings, etc?
well yeah, blowjobs, denial, high heels, netorare, crossdressing, getting convinced, girls knowing and getting what they want… stuff like that
Are there any fics that you would change or rewrite if given the chance?
If I had, they’d be done already
How conscious are you about including symbolism or foreshadowing in your fics?
I have no idea. Next!
Do you have a favorite piece of figurative language you’ve written?
No idea. Next!
Have you participated in any fic events/writing challenges? If yes, what were they and did you enjoy them?
not yet! I plan on getting at drarry in january 2025!
Arethere any fics that influenced you to write the way you do?
The only fics that ever influenced me to write anyhow were Guarding Dark and some other fic about Sphene/Zeiat from but it was about writing more, not how
What are your favorite fics at the moment?
previously mentioned Guarding Dark, about death of Sam Vimes and dwarvish mine sign that happened afterwards. A very good fic, really a small treasure.
Are you subscribed to any writers on AO3?
no… I am a terrible subscription reader, I never have time and I always postpone to the point I hate myself
Do you spend more time reading or writing?
lately writing, but it’s a wave
What’s your favorite writing compliment you’ve gotten?
that someone read my book/story/fic and loved it or that it resonated with them somehow
What do you tend to get complimented on the most about your writing?
that it is funny I guess
Do you have a fic you wish got a bit more love?
yeah all the shorties that got little to no hearts on tumblr, it’s always that longer one that someone didn’t read whole I presume… if it’s long I had an idea! Not always a good one, but long idea anyway
Is there a particular fic that readers gravitated towards that you didn’t expect?
yeah my collection of those shortest fics is currently my most read anything on ao3 like wtf
How do you deal with writing pressure, whether internal or external?
there is no external pressure but internally I am in a constant state of chaos so I really have no idea what I’m doing. Sometimes I feel pressure, sometimes I don’t.
Why do you enjoy writing fanfiction?
are you kidding me? It makes me happy, it makes other people happy and it’s an act of creation so naturally I enjoy that. Also that bitch jkr did nothing to make them more interesting so I had to make a stand for them
What motivates you during the writing process?
a thought that “this will be fun”
Do you have any writing advice you want to share?
just write anytime you feel like writing, if you don’t have an idea for a name or some other detail, simply put [name] or [detail] and continue and it will clarify later if the character is Clark Bones, an architect who likes tomatoes or a Roan Desmond Ruttington, a gardener who killed his mother’s lover when he was twelve and noone ever found out; never let yourself stumble on some minor details and change major things AFTER you write an entire chapters or bigger parts, really, you will thank me later. Also if you write sex, please please please remember that fucking is a machine-like activity and courting and talking about it must be witty, with a good taste and if not that, at least dont be gross and remember that there is nothing less fun than gross AND boring sex scenes.
Thank you, Kiz!
Fanfiction Writing Asks
Do you daydream a lot before you write, or go for it as soon as the ideas strike?
Where do you get your fic ideas?
Do you share your fic ideas, or do you keep them to yourself?
How do you choose which fics to write?
How many wips do you have? What fandoms/pairings are they for?
What’s the last line you wrote?
Post a snippet from a wip.
Post an out-of-context spoiler from a wip.
Does this word [chosen by asker] appear in your current wip?
Do you work on multiple wips or stick to one fic at a time?
Do you write scenes in order, or do you jump around?
Do you outline your fics? If yes, how detailed are your outlines? How far do you stray from them?
Do you listen to music while you write? If yes, what have you been listening to recently?
What is your favorite location and position to write in?
What’s your favorite time to write?
Do you write by hand, on your phone, or on your laptop?
Do you have a writing routine?
Do you enjoy research? Which fic of yours required the most research?
Do you enjoy creating OCs or do you prefer to stick solely to canon characters?
Do you prefer writing AUs or canon fics?
Do you prefer writing chaptered fics or one-shots?
Do you title your fics before, during, or after the writing process? How do you come up with titles?
Is writing the beginning, middle, or end of the story easiest? Hardest?
How do you choose whose POV to write in?
What’s your favorite part of the writing process (worldbuilding, brainstorming/outlining, writing, editing, etc)?
What’s your least favorite part of the writing process?
What area of writing do you feel strongest in?
What area of writing do you want to improve in?
What’s something about your writing that you’re proud of?
How much do you edit your fics? Do you edit as you write or wait until you finish the first draft?
Do you use a beta reader/editor?
Do you take fic requests? Why or why not?
Is there a specific word count that you hold yourself to/enjoy writing the most?
How much of your personal life/experience do you include in your fics?
What’s your favorite fic you’ve posted?
What fic are you proudest of?
What fic has been the hardest for you to write?
What is your most self-indulgent posted story?
What’s your most self-indulgent wip?
What is your favorite world that you’ve created for a fic?
Who’s your favorite character you’ve written?
What’s your favorite title that you’ve come up with?
Is there a trope or idea that you’d really like to write but haven’t yet?
What is your favorite genre to write?
What genre/trope do you tend to write the most?
If you could only write one type of AU for the rest of your life, what would it be?
Is there a trope that you’ve written before but are now sick of?
Who is your favorite character to write for? Has this changed since you’ve started writing for that fandom?
What fic of yours would you say is the best introduction to you as a writer?
How would you describe your writing style?
Does what you like to write differ from what you like to read?
What’s the average word count of your fics?
What is the most-used tag on your ao3?
What’s the fandom/pairing distribution of your posted fics?
Have you noticed any patterns in your fics? Words/expressions that appear a lot, themes, common settings, etc?
Are there any fics that you would change or rewrite if given the chance?
How conscious are you about including symbolism or foreshadowing in your fics?
Do you have a favorite piece of figurative language you’ve written?
Have you participated in any fic events/writing challenges? If yes, what were they and did you enjoy them?
In [insert fic], what inspired the idea for the plot?
In [insert fic], what’s your favorite scene that you wrote?
In [insert fic], is there a deleted scene/idea you wish you could have included? Why did it get cut?
What was the hardest part of writing [insert fic]?
If you rewrote [insert fic] now, would you change anything?
If you wrote a sequel to [insert fic], what would happen in it?
What’s a fun fact about [insert fic]?
If a fic was titled [insert made up title], what would this story be about/how would you write it?
Are there any fics that influenced you to write the way you do?
What are your favorite fics at the moment?
Are you subscribed to any writers on AO3?
Do you spend more time reading or writing?
What’s your favorite writing compliment you’ve gotten?
What do you tend to get complimented on the most about your writing?
Do you have a fic you wish got a bit more love?
Is there a particular fic that readers gravitated towards that you didn’t expect?
How do you deal with writing pressure, whether internal or external?
Why do you enjoy writing fanfiction?
What motivates you during the writing process?
Do you have any writing advice you want to share?
Free space - asker can come up with any writing or fic-related question they want!
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★ TINY LITTLE FIRES.
for two firemen whose jobs are to help civilians, they've managed to spark flames inside you that you wish not to extinguish.
( fic demographics. ) jujutsu kaisen, toji fushiguro & sukuna ryomen, sexually mature | minors, ageless & blank blogs : do not interact & 2519 words !
╰┈➤ firefighter!toji fushiguro & sukuna ryomen & afab!reader (she/her), throatfucking, fingering, dirty talk mostly on sukuna's behalf, double penetration, anal & vaginal sex, unprotected sex, creampie.
( author's note. ) i thought of this specific prn link when writing this and thought it was tojikuna fucking reader. just a liddol visual while you read 😋
It was overwhelming, the heat of two men looming over you— how they were both so hauntingly handsome as their eyes explored your body. They caged you in with their bodies, tiny little fires sparking inside of the pit of your stomach as they held interest on you all night. Shoko wanted to hold a small celebration dinner after completing her residency, finally becoming an actual doctor. She held it at a small bar and grill, where the food was greasy and the drinks were strong. You hadn’t thought your night wouldn’t be one so special, just have a few drinks and enjoy the time with your friends. However, from afar, two men had their eyes on you the majority of the night. Crimson and hazel following your form in a way that had you constantly looking behind you, eyes never failing to meet theirs.
You weren’t the only one to take notice of their domineering stares, Shoko watching over your shoulder before saying, “You should go talk to them.”
Eyes widening as your head quickly turns to her. Immediately, you shook your head. “I’m here to celebrate you.”
“You’re here to have fun,” she corrects. “Plus, you need it— them. When was the last time you had a spontaneous hook-up, much less a threesome?”
She was right. You rarely spend your leisure time actually doing any leisure, always finding something to keep you busy or something that came around the corner last minute that you completely forgot about. Your social life went down the drain outside of her, Geto and Gojo. But even the time you spend with them is too short. However, you don’t want to be a bad friend.
“But,” you pout. “Who’s going to drop you home if you get too wasted?”
“That’s for me to worry about,” Shoko says. “I’ll probably have one of the waitresses do it if it comes to that.”
“I don’t feel—”
“I don’t care how you feel,” Shoko frowns, nudging you from your chair. “Go to them right now, or I’ll disown you as a friend.”
You’re not sure if you’re thankful for Shoko, or if you want to curse her. You feel like a mouse trapped inside of a lion’s den. Outside of the conversation with Shoko, you can’t recall how you even ended up in this situation, just knowing that you walked up to the bar, signaling for a bartender in their close vicinity. You let them watch you, slowly creeping closer towards them.
Other than their impressive physique that had other men gawking at them in jealousy, they were different. One had dark hair that went over his forehead, black strands that nearly prickled his hazel green eyes. He had a scar on the left corner of his lip that had you curious how it ended up there in the first place. The other man has messy pink hair and piercing red eyes as he scrutinizes you, tattoos travel down his neck that you’re not sure where they travel to because of the hoodie he has on.
You only remember through short conversation that they were firefighters, but other than that, they were very straightforward with what they wanted from you. And from the many men that have tried approaching you before, you could respect it. You respected it so much that you let them bring you to their shared apartment, their hands roaming your body the moment you were inside.
Your dress hiked up over your waist as the pink-headed man— Sukuna— has found comfort in your breasts, massaging and kneading the fat as the brunette in front of you plays with the hem of your panties, finding fun in teasing you as your head falls to the chest of the tattooed man behind you. Wedged between them, there’s no room for escape as they pull out soft moans from you. Your braids tickle Sukuna’s skin as he watches you fall apart so easily. “We’ve got you this worked up and we’ve barely done a thing to you. It’s kinda pathetic… and cute.”
Just as he says this, Toji’s fingers dip inside of your panties, running to run two fingers down your clit and in between your folds. It has your chest rising and falling in the anticipation of it all, so needy and desperate to be filled by these two large men. “You should feel how wet she is. It’s like she hasn’t been fucked in forever.”
It’s an epiphany upon both men, a deep hum reverberating off of Sukuna’s chest as one hand leaves from under your dress. Black painted fingernails that reach to grab your face harshly and forcing you to turn, your eyes meeting his daunting red ones. “You poor thing,” he breathes. “Your pussy needs to be well taken care of then, huh?”
“Yeah.” You can’t help but nod. “Yeah, it does.”
“It’s a good thing you got us, huh?” To which you nod again, whispering out a “yes.”
They lead you to the confined space of one of their bedrooms. You still have your back to Sukuna, sitting on his lap as he pulls the dress over your head. Breasts spilling out and leaving you nearly bare in front of them, the only thing left on you are your flimsy pair of panties with a hearty stain right in the center from your arousal. You can feel the hard erection of Sukuna right against your ass. Oh, how he feels so big and thick underneath you that it has your pussy clenching in a desire for something— someone— to be inside of you.
Sukuna’s hand snakes in between your legs, the gloss of the black shining underneath the dim lighting as he shifts your panties to the side. Your folds glisten and shine, resembling the gloss of a porcelain doll. He spreads your lust over your clit as Toji begins to undo his pants, a sliver of his dark happy trail peaking out as his shirt rises. He’s in a haste, dragging down his pants and underwear, revealing his lengthy cock. Dark and heavy shaft that weighs him down surely as it hits his inner thigh instead of standing up prominently. He surely rivals the few partners you’ve had down the road. It’s intimidating, but your cunt is a curious thing, not caring if it’s the same thing that killed the cat. From its nine lives, you’re sure you can be brought back to life over and over.
Tiny little fires ignited in the pit of your stomach, you’re sure that these men are the only ones able to extinguish them. Toji holds the hose, his length in hand as the tip drips in his precum, sauntering over to you with it in hand. Your head moves involuntarily, moving yourself to the edge of Sukuna’s lap.
“Look at her,” Sukuna moves a stray braid, pulling it back behind your air. “So eager…”
Toji adores it, reaching to cup your face as you lean closer to him. His cock so dangerously close to your begging mouth that's lolled open and ready. His tip kisses your bottom lip, smearing his pre against it and making your lips shine in the coat of lust-born gloss. Sukuna’s fingers still dance around your clit, teasing at your entrance as he plays with your folds. You moan and mewl, keeping eye contact with Toji while you squirm in the other man’s lap in need.
“Please…” It comes out in a soft breath, whiny as your voice jumps up a few pitches. With two fingers against your chin, Toji makes you meet his eyes.
“Don’t worry, I’ll give ya what you need,” he says before making the head of his cock enter your mouth. It takes your breath away, making you literally speechless as you’re only left to moan and mewl. Your muffled voice goes ignored as a dragged out groan leaves the brunette's lips as he curses. “Yeah, that’s so much better.”
Shallow thrusts in your mouth, it’s a filthy sight to envision as you’re held tightly by Sukuna. Finally does he end his torture against your pussy, the two fingers that swirled around your fat clit now pushing inside of your needy hole. Subconsciously do you clench, making it hard for him to enter before he’s slapping at the sensitive nub, making a squeal spark from your lips as the vibrations run straight through Toji’s cock.
“Fuck,” he curses, pushing more of his length inside of your poor little mouth, forcing you to open wider to further accommodate him. Sukuna bites at the shell of your ear simultaneously, stretching out your cunt with two of his thick fingers. Your whines of pain are muffled by the cock in your mouth, your legs tensing around the hand in between them as your cheeks hollow around Toji. A deep inhale you take before you momentarily stop breathing altogether, the head of his cock hitting the back of your throat and causing you to gag.
The choked out cough is only music to their ears as Sukuna bucks his hips upwards in you, fucking your hole with his fingers and Toji stilling inside of you as you struggle to breathe. Tears prickle the corner of your eyes, face pushed into his happy trail. Tangled in this web that you willingly trapped yourself in, it’s starting to frighten you as you feel yourself drowning in the water of their hoses. You cry from the overwhelming sensation, how it feels so good to be used like this, the wet sounds of your pussy being fucked and abused by Sukuna’s fingers and the mess that Toji makes of your face, your makeup being smeared as tears run down and your lip gloss dissipating with each and every thrust of his cock inside you.
It’s painful how Toji’s hand pulls at your hair, holding it as leverage as he drills his length inside of your mouth. Your mouth being used as a fleshlight for him to obliterate, he’s a selfish man as he can only think of his release. And it’s the sheer amusement of you that spurs on Sukuna, how your pussy salivates around his fingers as they stretch out your tight hole. Your honeyed slick painting the two digits as you clench around him. You continue to rock your hips against him, having him hold restraint as it goes straight to his cock. His free hand wrapped around the expanse of your waist as he batters your cunt until you’re feeling that call deep within. Your eyes squinting shut as you mewl out pathetically before the two men as Sukuna alerts Toji, “She’s gonna cum.”
“Well, she better hold it,” he says, speaking to you as if you weren’t there. As if you’re not the girl with his cock in your mouth. However, you obey, trying to keep it together as Sukuna’s unrelenting, his drilling inside of your pussy only getting worse in an effort to make you fall apart all too soon. Your legs spasm as you can’t hold it any longer, capturing Sukuna’s hand as you cream around his fingers. Fortunately, he doesn’t pry your legs open, only chuckling deviously to himself when your lower body finally relaxes.
Toji chases his high inside of your mouth, leaving you to gag and choke around his length as he fucks it until he feels himself twitching. “Make sure to swallow all of me. Don’t waste a single drop,” he says before grunting. He spills himself inside of you, forcing you to swallow as he cums deep. You squint your eyes shut as he pushes his hips deeper before finally retracting and his cock falling to his thigh. Your throat’s dry, the absence leaving you gasping for air as you whine out, head hitting Sukuna’s chest.
You’re made a pretty mess on his lap, your orgasm staining his pants as his fingers finally exit your cunt. He brings the coated digits to his lips, sucking them clean as a deep hum vibrates off his chest. “This starved pussy tastes so good. I think we might want to keep you after this.”
Sukuna pulls you both further on the bed, shedding his pants along the journey as you feel his length in between the crevice of your ass. Toji has your legs pressed against your chest, both holes out and vulnerable for their taking. You can feel Sukuna’s fingers inside your asshole, stretching you with the same two digits that were previously in your pussy while Toji’s got his cock aligned at your entrance. Your heart pangs heavily against your chest, trying to make a get away, but you swallow the anticipation away as you peet at Toji above you. However, it’s Sukuna that you feel first, his girthy length piercing through you as if it was creating a new hole inside of you as you cry out in pain.
“Breathe,” Toji has to remind you, feeling how tense you’ve become as Sukuna has stretched out your poor asshole. With all the prep he’s done, nothing could have prepared you for the real thing. Finally does your body relax when you feel Toji’s length glide against your folds before his tip kisses at your entrance. Both sheathing themselves completely in you, this moment feels like the most gentle they’ve ever been in you, waiting for you to calm down before you’ve given them the okay.
You’re the sweetest and most salacious thing they’ve ever devoured, cocks plunging inside of your holes greedily as they both thrust inside of you. The heat of their bodies leave you so dizzy as you can’t focus on a thing around you, and certainly not on a word either of them have said.
“Taking our cocks so greedily,” Toji pants into your ear. “You’re a selfish little thing.”
“But the best one we’ve had yet,” Sukuna rebuttals, thinking of the countless times someone’s had to back down in the past. They thought you were close to it, how in your eyes there were moments of second guessing and terror written all over you. But you pretty little thing, you’ve braved it through, stuffed to the brink by two enormous men.
Tiny little fires inside of you that they only make bloom even further, creating a wildfire in their paths as they beat and batter both of your holes. They stretch your out deliciously, having you ignore the ache that you feel course through your body as you gnaw on your bottom lip. No amount of water would extinguish the desire that’s now embedded deep within you, their seed spilling inside of you as you cream uncontrollably.
Bed sheets stained as the pungent smell of sex infiltrates the air as the room grows hot and stuffy, caught within the flames of shared lust. When they’re done with you, cum drips from your cunt and gaping ass as you fall on your face. When you finally head back home, you find both of their numbers saved inside of your phone and a message from Toji:
Sukuna’s right. I wouldn’t mind keeping you.
And you wouldn’t mind being kept.
( author's note. ) here's my hand at trying to write more plotless porn. :p
#sukuna ryomen x reader#toji fushiguro x reader#sukuna ryomen smut#toji fushiguro smut#tojikuna x reader#tojikuna smut#toji x reader#toji smut#sukuna x reader#sukuna smut#jjk x reader#jjk smut#jujutsu kaisen x reader#jujutsu kaisen smut#jujutsu kaisen x you#jjk x you#toji fushiguro x you#sukuna ryomen x you#sukuna x you#toji x you#x reader#x black reader#( 🀄 ) : standalone.#tw: (n)sfw
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Fictober Day 24 & 26: Against A Wall/Exhibitionism
Fictober Masterlist | Main Masterlist
Pairing: Matt Murdock x F!Reader
Prompt: Against A Wall/Exhibitionism(✨)
Summary: You and Matt can't wait to have each other.
Warnings: SMUT (18+), dom!Matt, public sex, slight exhibitionism (the window is open, and someone’s behind the door, but no one actively watches; it’s mentioned to be a turn-on though), wall sex, established relationship, use of "good girl", unprotected p in v, no foreplay, not proofread
Word Count: 1.5k
A/n: This was originally going to be two separate fics, but I decided to put them together because it works best like this. I didn't want to duplicate the plot, so I just merged them.
Read Me On AO3! (Coming soon)
The bar is bustling around you, but he is the only thing you can focus on.
His tight jaw, the beard that used to be only a stubble a mere week ago, those hazel eyes hiding behind his red glasses that reflect the neon lights of the many signs Josie has hanging around the place—he looks sinful like this, and you want nothing more than to get on your knees and suck the life out of his cock.
The condensation from his beer bottle trickles down the back of his hand. Your pussy has memorized the feeling of those thick fingers inside you, your neck yearning to feel them wrapped around your pulse point until you forget how to breathe.
He’s been wound up for weeks. It is rather selfish of you to think that it’s hot when he’s like this, but you can’t help it; this man does unspeakable things to you even when he’s not touching you.
They won their case today—he and Foggy. He should be enthusiastic, but the tension in his shoulders has yet to fade. He would have said no to his best friend’s offer to get drinks, too, if you hadn’t said yes before he could form a coherent thought.
He needs you. And you need him, too. He can smell the slick soaking through your lace panties. He can hear your walls clench around nothing as you cross your legs for some friction, and your heart starts to beat faster every time you look at him.
He knows you are praying to a God you don’t believe in, praying for his hands on you, praying that he will fuck you hard and fast and soon because if he doesn’t, you will lose your mind.
The glass almost shatters against the table when he sets it down more forcefully than intended. “I, uh, have to use the bathroom,” he says.
You look up at him. He tilts his head in your direction. As he gets up, his hand brushes over your thigh. It is only a breath, but the contact shoots straight to your weeping core.
Oh.
Oh.
“Excuse me,” and with his cane clutched tightly, he makes his way through the crowd.
You empty your glass in one big gulp, giving your friends a strained smile. “I better make sure he gets there,” you say.
“You really think Matt’s gonna get lost?” Foggy retorts with a laugh. “Matt? Come on. Guy’s like a bat.”
You shrug. “Better safe than sorry.”
You can’t wait for another second. Paving your way through the crowd, you make your way to where the bathrooms are.
Only one of the doors is ajar, which you take as your cue to slip in and lock it behind you. For a moment, you wonder if this is even a good idea; people might need this bathroom, but then your back hits the wall, and one look at Matt is enough for you to throw caution to the fucking wind.
“I missed you,” Matt growls, capturing your lips in a searing kiss.
You melt under the force of his fire. Greedy hands tear at your dress. Teeth clash in a fight for dominance. No fabric on your body is safe, his hands too eager, too desperate to care about your appearance. If you have to walk around with his cum dripping down your thighs because your panties are too ripped to cover your swollen cunt after this, he will gladly take it. He will take it for just a chance to have you.
“Jump,” he says, and you’re quick to wrap your legs around his waist as he hoists you up. “You know how much I love to hear you moan, but I need you to be quiet this time. Can you do that?”
Your moan comes in the form of a strangled breath, getting caught on your sealed lips before it can escape.
“Use your words.”
“Yes,” you choke out.
“Good girl.”
No matter how badly you think he needs you, it is worse. Much worse. His nerves are alight with a near animalistic craving beyond rational thought or reason. His need for you is branded forever into his weary bones, and they continue to ache until he finally has you right where he wants you.
Until he can finally thrust his cock into your tight pussy and listen to the way your walls grip him so tightly.
Until he can finally swallow your moans with the force of his lips.
Until he can drown in the force of your orgasm like a man stuck in the desert for too long.
Matt unbuckles his belt, freeing his aching cock from the confines of his underwear. Your panties are a long-forgotten afterthought. He pushes the lace aside with two fingers, exposing you to the cold air streaming in from the open window.
“Need you,” he grunts.
You’re so wet to the touch.
You gasp when his tip bumps against your clit. He misses once, then twice again. His impatience is written into the crease between his brows. Beyond frustrated, you reach for his cock, sliding the thick head between your folds.
This stoic, assertive force of a man you wanted to maul in the courtroom earlier as the jury gave their verdict of ‘not guilty’ has never looked more like a pathetic mess than he does in the flickering light of the bar bathroom.
He doesn’t give you time to adjust. Matt pushes his hips into yours, burying his cock in your cunt, and the wall almost caves in behind you. The force at which he pounds into you threatens to split your skull open, but oh, you have never felt more alive.
His face is buried in your neck. You’re all there is. The ghastly smell, the noise, the vibrations of the old water lines, he tunes it all out. His senses zero in on you, the sole object of all his desires. Now that he doesn’t have to focus on anything but you, he can finally breathe again. He can smell your perfume, taste the salt of your sweat trickling down your neck; you consume him.
Matt thrusts into you for just a little more of this intoxicating feeling—the way you’re clenching around him, and how your heart races for him. He aims his cock toward the spot that makes your toes curl in your heels, and he knows before you even feel it.
A cry threatens to break free from your soul. Matt clasps his hand over your swollen lips to silence you. You choke on it, rumbling like thunder in your chest.
It takes everything in you not to scream anyway. Not to moan. Not to cry out how good he feels. Right there, you want to say. Right there, don’t fucking stop. He drags his cock in and out of your pussy, though he never really pulls all the way out before he’s lost himself in you again.
The doorhandle rattles. He doesn’t stop.
You whimper. “Matthew…”
“Shh,” Matt coos.
Another rattle. “Is someone in there?” someone asks from the other side.
You look at the door, but before you can tell him to stop—stop because you don’t want anyone seeing you this way—his cock brushes against your G-spot. Your eyes roll back into your skull. Your words melt like candle wax on your tongue.
He pulls you down to meet him, your clit dragging deliciously over his skin. You’re losing it.
Only a few inches away, a stranger is trying to get into the bathroom, waiting, and it only spurs him on.
You bite into his palm.
You are so close, and even if someone were to break down this stupid door, you would probably still fall apart. Because the thought of getting caught being fucked so perfectly by the man of your dreams turns you on more than it should.
He puts his lips to your ear. “Ignore them,” he says. “Focus on me.”
Your walls clamp around his cock.
“Good girl. I want you to come for me. Can you do that?”
He thrusts harder. Faster. Deeper. Deeper.
You can’t stop yourself from moaning his name as the wave crashes into you, and Matt does the only thing he can think of that won’t give you away; he captures your lips in a bruising kiss that splits your bottom lip in two.
He drinks your blood like a vampire, drowning out his own grunt as his hips stutter and he spills into you. You’ve missed him so much.
Your orgasm has barely subsided when he pulls out of you, placing you back on your own two feet. The world is spinning.
“Wh–” you stutter.
He shushes you, index finger against your lips as he pulls your panties back on. His cum trickles out of your pussy into the fabric. You can still feel him so deep inside you.
“We’re going home,” he says.
“But–”
“I’m not done with you. We’re gonna take a cab,” he cups your face, “I’m gonna take you home, and I’m not gonna stop touching you until you’re covered in my cum.”
Your knees buckle.
“Okay?”
“Okay,” you breathe.
He has the audacity to look smug about it. “That’s my girl.”
Walking through Josie’s stuffed to the brim with his cum is a strangely erotic thought, but you know that the night has only just begun, and by the time he is done with you, you won’t even be able to remember your name.
@ebathory997 @the-b33skn33s @scoliobean @drmeghanjones @lanae111 @steve-chandler @lucienofthelakes @xnatyx @gpenguin666 @linamarr @mcugeekposts @itwasthereaminuteago @norestfortheshelbywicked @yarrystyleeza @littlenerdyravenclaw @etanordoesbullsh1t @thychuvaluswife @harleycao @schneeflocky @imjustcal @pipsqueakkitten @merlinbtch @sya-skies @amberritonicole @ravenclaw617 @pigeonmama @bohemianrhapsody86 @a-gir1-has-n0-name @callsign-ember @chittaphonstar @buckyyyismahhlife @trublu2u @zomtart @ethereal-blaze
#matt murdock#matt murdock x reader#matt murdock x fem!reader#matt murdock smut#daredevil#lizzi's fictober 2024#charlie cox
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sugarcoated brain [teaser]
⏯ teaser word count: 723 | full fic: 13.7k ⏯ genre: punk band frontman!shotaro, venue manager!reader, shotaro is whipped, reader is emotionally unavailable, is it a slowish burn or is it angst?, whatever it is ur reading a starlightkun fic so there’s a happy ending :), ft. eunseok/sungchan/wonbin as shotaro’s bandmates welcome back boys & wayv as reader’s coworkers ⏯ warnings: not necessarily a warning but since i do generally avoid describing the reader’s appearance in my fics, i wanted to give a heads up—reader works at a punk/alternative concert venue and is generally in/around that scene. reader is mentioned and/or implied to have some tattoos and piercings (other than earlobes) ⏯ extra info: set in the same universe as filler episodes, but u don’t need to read that in order to understand this one, filler eps!sungchan and sugarcoated!shotaro r just in the same band! also the title is from a 5sos song lol ⏯ estimated release: saturday, november 16, 2024 3:00 p.m. eastern time
“Is that sanitary?” Eunseok’s voice announced Roses for Eyes’ arrival that particular afternoon, as you sat atop the bar counter, scrolling on your phone in one of your few moments of peace and quiet around Venue:Hell.
“Kiss my ass, Eunseok,” you replied without even looking up.
“Yeah, I’ll get in line,” he retorted, making Sungchan and Wonbin laugh.
That finally prompted you to slide your gaze up, just in time to see the three of them laughing over by the stage as Shotaro flipped them all off over his shoulder, making his way towards you. He had two cups in one hand, one with a bright green straw in it, and the other without a straw, and you saw that the other three band members each had a plastic cup with a straw sticking out of them as well. You silently watched Shotaro approach, raising an eyebrow at him once he’d stopped in front of you.
“We were getting boba on our way here, and thought we’d grab you one, too.” His cheeks were a bright pink as he held the unopened cup out to you, and fished a packaged purple straw out from the front pocket of his black jean jacket.
“Who’s this ‘we’ that you’re talking about?” You asked humorously. “They all apparently think getting me boba is kissing my ass.”
Shotaro straightened up, puffing his chest out. “Actually, yeah. Fuck ‘em. I got you one because I thought it’d be nice to get you one too since you do so much for us every week. It’s uh-It’s honey milk tea, because I didn’t know what flavor you liked.”
“Thank you, Shotaro.” You accepted the cup and straw from him graciously, to a chorus of snickers from the spectators on the other side of the floor. “Honey milk tea is more than acceptable.”
“But it’s not your favorite?”
“I don’t have a favorite.” You set the cup on the bartop beside you to stab the straw into it.
“You—Hey, are those mine?” He seemed to have finally noticed the sunglasses perched atop your head.
“What? These?” You teased, tapping the plastic accessory arm on one side of your head.
“I was looking for those today!”
You took them off, offering them out towards him. “You left them here last week.”
Shotaro took the glasses just to turn them right back around, take a step closer to you, and place them back on your head, a fond smile on his face as he did so. “I think you look better in them, actually. You can hold onto them for a little longer.”
You swallowed, your chest suddenly feeling too tight for your heart, and six eyes suddenly feeling like way too many to be in the room with you two right now. You chuckled, trying to keep up the congenial tone as you once more pulled them off. This time, you folded the arms and tucked the sunglasses into Shotaro’s jacket pocket for him. “Thanks, Shotaro, but I can’t take your sunglasses. They’re really rockstar sunglasses anyway, not for someone like me.”
At that moment, you grabbed your boba tea and hopped off the bar, scooting out from between him and the counter. You avoided looking at the others, beelining for the back office.
When Shotaro had to come get his in-ears from you just a few minutes later, you gave him the same pleasant smile as usual, handing him the case. “Here you go.”
“Thanks.” He tapped the case against his palm, the sound dampened by the fingerless gloves he was wearing that day. “What did you mean? When you said someone like you.”
“Wh—About the sunglasses?” You’d hardly expected him to confront you about that comment at all, much less alone now, just you and him in the office, no peanut gallery. While six eyes had felt like too many, this felt far too intimate. You somehow felt more exposed than before. “Like I said—They’re cool rockstar sunglasses, that’s what you are. You should wear them you know, up on stage, being all cool and stuff. I’m crew; no point in me wearing them while I’m sitting back here where nobody can see them.”
He frowned, but thankfully didn’t try to give them to you again. “I think you’re cool, Y/N.”
With that, he left the office.
⤷ masterlist
#shotaro x reader#riize x reader#shotaro#shotaro imagine#riize imagine#nct x reader#riize#osaki shotaro#shotaro imagines#riize imagines#nct imagine#nct imagines#i: shotaro#f: sugarcoated brain#scb: teaser#writing#text#mine#taro
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a simple favor | stiles x reader
masterlist
pairing: stiles stilinski x f!reader (enemy/witch)
word count: 7,120
warnings: language, banter, minor blood, allusions to sex *gasp* but no smut (sorry!)
summary: despite being self-proclaimed "enemies", you manage to drag stiles to your house for help with a spell...and maybe more.
author's note: hi friends! hope everyone is doing as well as they can be, and hope i can offer up a small distraction. i'm back with another witch!reader x stiles fic but this exists in a universe in which you are a "bad guy" and stiles can't stand you...for now ;) more deets at the end! also please just roll with me on any witch stuff idk if anything is accurate to witch lore, i feel as if with magic the rules are made up anyway so i'm doing what i want :)
“Hi!”
“AH- Jesus, what the hell are you doing here?” Stiles jumps before his face contorted in annoyance.
He was on his way to pick up Scott. For some god forsaken reason his best friend wanted to get a tattoo before they started junior year and Stiles was meant to “supervise”. However, just as Stiles hops into the driver’s seat of his jeep, he’s greeted in the passenger seat by you.
And you may or may not be Stiles’s least favorite person in the world.
“I was waiting for you,” you state, point blankly like it was normal for you to have broken into his car.
Stiles rolls his eyes, “God, do I want to know why?”
“Doubtful,” you sigh, turning in the seat to start putting on the seatbelt, “You should probably start driving.”
Stiles slowly narrows his eyes, “Why?”
“I need your help with a spell.”
“My help? What makes you think I’m going to help you?”
“Because you know I could kill you with the snap of my fingers.” you roll your head in his direction with a pointed look, “Besides, you owe me.”
Oh yeah. Because you saved his life this past spring when Gerard Argent kidnapped him after his lacrosse game.
Stiles inwardly groans. You had a point. He had a feeling though no matter how many favors he paid you, you’d never let that go.
You may have saved his life, but the thing was, to him and his friends you were still the “bad guy”. You were still the same witch that pretended to befriend him and Scott when Scott first became a werewolf, just for them to find out you were playing them to help Peter, who had enlisted your help to regain his strength and heal from the Hale fire. Stiles had barely tolerated you since the day you met, but after that, any ounce of trust and respect he had for you vanished.
From that point on, Stiles decided he hated you. And despite defeating Peter, your presence loomed. For some reason, Derek leaned on you when he was building his pack of betas, giving Stiles more reason to despise you. But shortly after that, out of nowhere, Scott sought your help to try to stop Jackson as the Kanima and figure out who was controlling him. There was a brief moment where Stiles thought you could become an ally but admittedly he fucked that up when Peter came back from the dead and he jumped to the conclusion that you, once again, aided and abetted him. Turns out, in fact, he was wrong, and it was actually Lydia - his hopeless crush for nearly a decade - and he had accused and berated you for nothing. So any shot at you guys finding common ground was dead in the water. And you had decided to be petty and align yourself with the Argents just to piss him off.
He hadn’t seen you since that night. He’d heard off hand from Isaac who’d heard from Derek you were spending the summer on the East Coast, doing some witch training or coven bonding shit with your family.
That was until right now, in the front seat of his jeep.
“Scott is waiting for me.” Stiles finally responds; a half-hearted attempt to get you to go away.
You make a face, “Scott can go one night without being codependent.”
Stiles rolls his eyes, but he finds himself starting the engine. “Where are we going?”
“My house.”
“You’re taking me to your lair?”
“Ha ha.”
“I don’t even know where you live.”
“I’ll give you directions as we go. It's just right on the outskirts of the preserve.”
“You live in the woods?”
“Just drive.”
Stiles should question how quickly he concedes but there is in fact the possibility of you hexing him or something. Which you’ve yet to do in any serious or fatal way. But another part of him is admittedly curious; to know what exactly you want, to see how you actually live.
From the little information he’s learned about you the past year, he knows you live with your aunt and were home schooled up until recently when you enrolled in Beacon Hills High during the winter semester. But other than that, you were just the mysterious witch he hardly knew anything about. Aside from knowing you were a pain in his ass and someone he’s hesitant to trust.
But he thinks he can survive one evening with you.
The drive is quiet with just you providing simple directions. At one point he tries to make a feeble attempt at small talk, but you instantly lunge forward to turn on the radio.
You turn to look at him in disbelief when the channel that’s on is the police scanner he rigged up. He shrugs sheepishly before you shake your head and turn the dial to some indie station.
Stiles puckers his lips and nods as soft music fills the car. “Arctic Monkeys, nice-”
“Turn left at the stop sign.”
“Right.”
You turn to him with an amused look. “You don’t know how to act when we’re not at each other’s throats.”
Stiles scoffs, “Can you blame me? I barely think of you as a real person half the time, I don’t know what to say to you.”
You chuckle as you stare out the window, “Well we’re almost there.”
“What kind of spell do you need my help with anyway? And why me?”
“Because you’re a human.”
“Okay…?”
“And I need your blood.”
“Oh great.”
“It’s a spell to make a protection amulet. So I can wear it and not be found by other witches.”
“And why do you need that?”
“Now that is none of your business.” You sigh, unbuckling your seatbelt, “And we’re here.”
Stiles observes the road they’re coming to the end of. Your house is indeed at the edge of the woods: a modest victorian-gothic style home hidden by trees.
“I didn’t even know there were houses out here.”
“Not many,” you reply as the two of you hop out of the jeep.
Stiles glances between you and his phone as you lead him to the front door, also texting Scott that he’ll need a raincheck on the tattoo adventure and he’ll explain later.
“Is your aunt home?”
“Nope, she’ll be gone until late.” You answer, unlocking the door for you both to enter.
Stiles takes in what he can from the foyer. He can’t get a full view of the space but he can definitely tell witches live here. The living room is lined with wooden bookshelves and candles and trinkets. He doesn’t have much time to observe when he watches you head for the staircase.
“Um, where are we going exactly?”
“My room,” You call without turning around.
“Woah,” Stiles huffs nervously, “We’re doing this in your bedroom?”
“Don’t get too excited Stilinski, you’re here for business not pleasure.”
Stiles is grateful you still haven’t bothered turning around to look at him, because he feels his face heat up as he finally follows you up the stairs.
No surprise, your room also fits right in with the aesthetic of the house. Moody colors, wooden bed posts, and candles on every surface. He watches you flick your wrist and every candle lights up, casting a warm glow around the room. It's the first time he’s thought your powers were cool, but he’d never admit that out loud.
“Is this the lair you were expecting?” you ask, turning around to face him while standing in front of your desk, which is littered with books, potion bottles, and a large pot.
Stiles shrugs, “It’s a little underwhelming.”
“Were you expecting me to live in an underground dungeon?”
“Something like that.”
You hum and turn back to face your desk, taking stock of the potion ingredients on hand.
Stiles wanders over to stand beside you, his hands in his pockets. “So explain to me what you mean by needing my blood.”
You pick up a necklace from your desk: a silver chain with an empty vial hanging on it. “I’m essentially making a potion to put in here. And if I wear it, it will make it harder for witches searching for me to track me or my magic. And human blood is on the recipe.”
“But why me?”
“I told you, because you’re human. Not a werewolf or a witch; a human. And humans have the purest form of blood. It's basically the secret ingredient.”
Stiles rolls his eyes at your nonchalance. “Okay I get that I guess, but why me? Couldn’t you have found some other schmuck to help you? Or have you scared off every other person in Beacon Hills with your shining personality.”
You turn to Stiles with a tight smirk, “As you may know, not many people are even aware that the supernatural is real. I know you do, and unfortunately you’re my best option. Allison is still in France from what I’ve gathered, Lydia is something but I haven’t quite figured that out yet, and using my aunt would require me having to explain what I’m doing and why. So you’re it buddy.”
“Oh so I’m literally your last choice. Boy am I honored.”
“You should be.”
“Wait, do you mean your aunt isn’t a witch like you?”
“Nope,” you shake your head, focusing back on the bottles on your desk, starting to add ingredients to the pot. “She’s not even technically my aunt. She was a family friend that took me in when I was young.”
“Why? What happened to your parents?”
You swallow, “You’re nosy.”
“Fine don’t tell me, but I think it's fair I get a little information since I’m the one helping you.”
“You’re the one who owes me, remember?”
“Yeah but it sounds like you can’t complete this spell without me and it seems pretty important so…thinking that gives me some leverage.”
You glance over at him with a glare and Stiles shoots you an innocent smile that makes you want to wipe it off his face.
You let out a deep breath, “My parents fled to god knows where when I was five. Apparently, my family has a centuries long feud with another coven and they’d evaded them for years until then. They decided leaving me with Jules was better for my safety. So I’ve been in Beacon Hills ever since. I actually didn’t know most of that until this summer. I sort of…had a run in with a member of that coven without realizing and now I’m afraid they’re going to find me here. Hence the protection amulet we’re making. Is that enough background information for you?”
Stiles raises his eyebrows as he absorbs everything. “Wow that’s…heavy. There’s some witch coven out there that's been trying to kill your family for centuries. No wonder you’re the way that you are.”
I let out an unamused huff as I add the last of the pre-prepared ingredients.
“Wait, is that unicorn dust- are unicorns real?”
I smirk as I pour it in, “Like I’d give away that information to you for free.”
I bite back a laugh as Stiles mutters dammit.
Turning back to him, I hold up a tiny needle. “Your turn.”
Stiles’ eyes widen briefly, holding up his hands as he steps back from you, “Woah, woah, be careful with that thing.”
You scoff, “Stiles, it's a sewing needle.”
“Well, I still haven’t completely agreed to this. How do I know you’re not tricking me into draining all of my blood?”
You roll your eyes, “Stiles I just need one drop. And then you’re free to go off on your date with Scott.”
Stiles rolls his eyes this time.
I try to fix him with a genuine look for the first time in the months we’ve known each other. “Come on. Haven’t I made it clear enough that this is important to me? I seriously would not have brought you here if it wasn’t. Don’t make me beg.”
“I’d kind of like to see-”
“Reminder, I can kill you.”
“Alright,” he groans, “Let’s just get this over with. Did I mention I hate needles?”
“Aw poor baby’s scared of a tiny needle,” you fake pout.
“Oh my god shut up, like you’re not afraid of anything.”
“Yeah, I’m afraid of admitting something embarrassing like that.”
“Okay, just stab me already.”
You chuckle and take another step closer to him, holding out your left hand. Stiles takes a deep breath and apprehensively places his hand upwards into yours, and you gently hold the tip of his pointer finger. Stiles glances around the room, wanting to look anywhere but you pricking him with the needle, as minor as it is.
“Jesus, I can feel your pulse, you need to calm down.” you comment.
“Sorry that I’m a generally anxious person.”
“Yeah I gathered that over the last year from the fact that you literally never stop talking,” you snicker, “Have you always been like this?”
“As long as I can remember.”
“And it doesn’t drive Scott crazy?”
“Well, I think Scott, like most sane people, finds it endearing.”
“Oh. Does Lydia find your constant yammering endearing?”
“Woah, okay, there’s no need to bring her into this,” Stiles sighs rubbing his head, “Can you just prick me?”
“I already did,” I reply, making Stiles whip his head back, staring at his finger between yours, and sure enough, a red drop of blood was already forming.
“When did you…” Stiles whispers.
I shrug, dropping the needle into a bin beside my desk. “I kept you distracted.”
Stiles watches you quietly, his lips slightly parted in disbelief, while you guide his hand over the pot and gently squeeze his finger so three drops of his blood fall into the potion with a hiss. Stiles grimaces at the pressure but it's not as bad as he thought. He’s trying to get over the fact that you tried to make this a little less painful for him by pricking him with the needle while he wasn’t thinking about it. It was surprisingly…thoughtful?
“There, the final touch,” you murmur. You turn back to face him, his hand still in yours.
“Great. Do you happen to have a bandaid for the patient?” He asks.
“No need,” I reply, grabbing a small piece of gauze from the table and placing it over his finger to stop the blood.
Stiles once again watches you carefully. As you apply the pressure to his finger, he takes note of the way you bite your lip while you concentrate. After a few more quiet moments, you toss the piece of gauze away and gently press your thumb into his pointer finger and close your eyes, murmuring something under your breath. Once you open your eyes, you look back down at his finger and suddenly there is no puncture wound.
“There, good as new.”
You finally look back up at him - his face closer to yours than you remember - and he’s still staring at you silently.
“What? Were you expecting me to kiss it better?”
Stiles shakes his head, snapping out of his stupor. “Wha- no! No. Just…not used to you using your powers for good.”
I shake my head and finally release his hand, turning back to the pot and start mixing it all together.
Stiles clears his throat and glances over your shoulder. “So what now? You mix everything together in the pot and boom, you’re good to go?”
“Cauldron,” you correct, “And I also have to pour it into the vial and cast an incantation to activate it.”
Stiles nods, genuinely intrigued by the process. He watches you quietly mix everything for another minute or so, before you reach for the tiny vial, and then you basically ladle an ounce of it into the small tube.”
“Wow, that’s a lot of potion you’re not using. Do witches care about waste?”
I fix Stiles with a hard look and he holds up his hands in surrender. He continues watching you close your hand around the vial tightly and hold it to your chest, once again quietly reciting an incantation. Stiles is almost certain the words you are saying are in Latin, and again, he’d never admit it to anyone, but he was kind of impressed.
When you are finished, you open your hand and look down to study the vial. From over your shoulder, Stiles sees the vial now has a slight green glow to it.
“Assuming it worked?” Stiles comments.
You shrug, “I guess the only way to truly find out if it didn’t is if one of those witches show up here.”
Stiles nods and then proceeds to stand there and watch you struggle to get the chain clasped around your neck.
He snorts, “What, is there no spell to put on a necklace?”
You roll your eyes, “Shut up.”
He can’t help but chuckle as he stands up straighter. “Look, do you- I mean, would you want…I could..”
You groan, tired of listening to him ramble, “What?”
“I could help you, you know!” Stiles exclaims in annoyance. “God I don’t even know why I offer.”
You frown, too stubborn to stop trying but also too frustrated to keep going. Sighing, you remove your hands from around your neck and forcefully place it in his hands, “It's one of those stupid, teeny tiny clasps that aren’t meant for human sized fingers.”
Stiles chuckles as he takes each end of the necklace into his hands, while you turn around and move your hair out of the way. “Are you saying you know of non-human fingers that handle necklaces because if so I’m crossing my fingers for a tiny mouse because that would be adorable.”
You bite back a smile, thankful you’re not facing him, “Shut up.”
Stiles keeps chuckling to himself as he brings the necklace around your neck, and carefully works to clasp it. He definitely also doesn’t use the time to inhale your scent and start to wonder if you use some kind of fragrance or if witches have a naturally alluring smell.
As you impatiently hold your hair and try not to think about the cramp forming in your arm, you also definitely aren’t thinking about the feeling of his warm breath on the back of your neck and praying he doesn’t see any goosebumps form on your skin.
“There,” Stiles whispers unintentionally soft, making him clear his throat in surprise, taking a steep step back, “All done.”
You let out a quiet sigh of relief, dropping your hair and turning around. “Thanks. For the assist and the blood donation.”
Stiles snorts with a nod, “Yeah.”
I look down at the amulet I created and gently hold it in my hands, “Seriously though. You know I wouldn’t ask if it wasn’t important. So…thank you.”
Stiles swallows and nods firmly, a little unsettled by the sincerity of the last few minutes, “...You’re welcome.”
You nod as well, unsure of where to go from here. “Well, I guess now your services are no longer needed and you are free to go, and we are free to proceed with business as usual; only speaking when we see each other against our will.”
Stiles huffs, crossing his arms, “What if I want to stay a little longer?”
You raise your eyebrows, “Why?”
“I have a few more questions.”
“Haven’t I told you enough?”
“I think I’m entitled to some more information,” Before you retort, he barrels on, “Look if some evil coven could potentially be invading Beacon Hills - ideally not since that spell should prevent that from happening, so you say - I think I have the right to know more about what's going on so I can be prepared for it.”
“And how exactly will you, Stiles Stilinski, prepare for that?”
“By…telling Scott…”
You snort and nod. Well fair enough I guess. “What else do you want to know?”
“How dangerous are we talking? Like, how badly do these people want you dead?”
You shrug, “I’ve only heard stories about how the feud originated. Supposedly, my family at some point in time, did something to steal powers from this other family.”
“Well it sounds like you guys are the bad guys in this scenario. Which tracks knowing you.”
“Well I’m pretty sure they did it in retaliation to them killing someone in my family in cold blood.”
“Oh.”
“Yeah, oh. So this thing goes back generations but I’m pretty sure something must have happened between my mom and this woman from that coven. I don’t know what, but she in particular has a vendetta against her and our family.”
“Is she the witch you had a run in with this summer?”
“No,” you frown looking down, “It was her son.”
Stiles’s eyebrows raise, “Oh. And did he immediately try to kill you with some spell at first sight?”
I shake my head, “Nope. He just…pretended to be someone else to gain my trust and subsequently asked me out just for me to find out none of it was real and he was trying to get to my magic the whole time.”
Stiles widens his eyes with each new piece of information, his stomach dropping as he learns that this guy used and manipulated you. Yeah you definitely weren’t the bad guy in this scenario.
“So, fun summer for me. How was yours?” You ask looking back up at him with a blank look on your face.
Stiles ignores your attempt to diffuse the conversation. “So you were seeing this guy all summer thinking he was some innocent…fling…and the whole time he was actually plotting to, what, kill you? Take your powers?”
“Something like that,” You shrug, “I didn’t stick around long enough to find out the end game with that one.”
“How did he even track you down in the first place if you’ve been hiding away here your whole life.”
“Apparently they’ve been biding time in Salem, hoping one day I’d find my way there to train with other witches. And I didn’t even know there were people to look out for until a few days ago, when I was talking to another witch I had met, who recognized his mom in a picture. I left on the spot and haven’t seen him since.”
“Did you tell him where you were from?”
“Nope, was trying to go for the whole, casual, mysterious summer fling thing.” you chuckle humorlessly. “That worked out so well for me.”
Stiles sighs, “So he has no idea where to look for you, and that amulet should keep him from getting any hints.”
“Yup.”
“And after all this…your parents are still out there hiding from them, too?”
You nod, looking down again, “Yeah…sometimes I wonder if they’re even still alive.”
Stiles frowns, “Jesus…now I’m almost sorry for…”
“No, no,” You shake your head, your face twisting in discomfort. “Don’t do that. This isn't what we do. You don’t feel sorry for me. You despise me. And honestly I prefer that version of us, I can’t stand the thought of you sympathizing with me.”
“Okay, okay,” Stiles holds his hands up, “I get it. You know maybe I’m not sorry, because a fucked up childhood doesn’t excuse the shit you did to us last year with Peter, and the generally annoying shit you’ve done since.”
You make a face but don’t argue with him.
Stiles continues staring you down, with an unfamiliar look on his face. “But…that shit that guy pulled on you this summer…even you don’t deserve to be taken advantage of like that.”
Your eyes slowly revert back to looking at his face, trying not to give away how vulnerable you felt sharing that information; not to mention how vulnerable you were this summer just to have that blow up in your face. You shift slightly, still uncomfortable with the atmosphere surrounding you two right now. You cross your arms tightly across your chest.
“Thanks…”
The two of you let the moment hang in the air for another few seconds before you clear your throat, not being able to stand the sincerity any longer.
“Well I guess next time I try to have a casual fling, I shouldn’t do it with a stranger I knew for all of a day before going out with him.”
Stiles chuckles dryly, “Guess not. Maybe you’d be better off getting to know a guy for a while first. If you can keep one around long enough without driving them up the wall.”
“Ha ha. Because you’re the picture of a guy with a successful love life. Remind me of the last time Lydia gave you a second look?”
Stiles glares at you, as he starts to sputter, “She…was looking at me when I was playing in that lacrosse game.”
“Oh so over three months ago? Wow you’re making huge strides.”
“Look, I’m playing the long game alright?”
I shake my head, “God, I don’t know why you even bother.”
Stiles' jaw teeters open and closed, “What? Is it that out of the realm of possibility that she could ever like me?”
“No, I just meant you could do better.”
Stiles stutters but no words immediately form in response to that. He stares at you blankly for a few beats. “I can do better? Me? Can do better than Lydia Martin?”
You roll your eyes, “You say that like she’s God's gift to this Earth.”
“Yeah, well…she’s still nice - sometimes - and highly intelligent, not to mention gorgeous.”
“Stiles, I’m not trying to disparage your precious Lydia, I just think you could do better than someone who doesn’t give you the time of day.”
“What…What do you mean?”
“Well for one it's kind of pathetic you’ve been hung up on her for so long with no reciprocation whatsoever.”
“Okay, I wouldn’t say-”
“And second, I don’t understand why a guy like you can’t find a girl who actually likes him back.”
“Well you say that like I’ve got a parade of girls waiting in line to date me.”
You shrug, “Trust me, there are some.”
Stiles scoffs, “Yeah right.”
“I think you're underestimating how many girls just want a sweet guy who will treat them well with a moderately nice face.”
Stiles shifts awkwardly, “Is that your type?”
“My tastes are a little more refined than that.”
“Well how do you know most girls see me that way?”
“Because objectively speaking, you do have a moderately nice face. Maybe even a step above that. And look at you, you grew your hair out this summer. Do that to impress Lydia?”
Stiles flushes, “Well not just…”
“Because I’m sure it will work on plenty of other girls when they see you at school next week.”
Stiles lets out a deep breath, looking at you curiously, “Why are you saying all this?”
You uncross your arms and sigh, taking a step towards him, “Look I’m just stating facts, and maybe I can spare you a compliment since you helped me out tonight. You deserve better than waiting for someone who may never come around. And maybe, who knows, I’m wrong and one day Lydia will come to her senses and see what's right there in front of her. But don’t waste all your time doing nothing. You could at least have fun in the meantime. And I’m sure there are plenty of girls who would jump at the chance.”
You give Stiles’ shoulder what should be a supportive squeeze, but because it's the two of you it feels wrong. You awkwardly lift your hand and pat him a couple times before retracting your arm all together.
Stiles stares at you, once again in awe, confused why you’re being so civil with him…let alone…kind? His eyes hone in on the way your nose scrunches up when you instantly regret touching his shoulder, and the way your lip curves up in amusement as you look back up at him. Your eyes have a warm glow amidst the candles lighting up your room. And he’s once again in close enough proximity to you to inhale your scent; a mix of vanilla, berries, and amber.
Yeah it definitely must be a witch thing, because he somehow finds himself being drawn closer to you. And before he knows it, he’s leaning completely in and kissing you.
It's a rare occurrence for you to be taken by surprise, but you do jump slightly when his lips touch yours. He did it so fast you didn’t even have a chance to process it, let alone prevent it from happening. You don’t immediately kiss back but you don’t immediately pull away either, chalking it up to the shock.
Stiles very quickly realizes what he’s doing and the fact that you’re not reciprocating as he pulls away slightly to take in your full reaction.
You narrow your eyes at him slightly, “I didn’t mean me.”
Stiles’ eyes widen and his lips part, once again struggling to form words as he starts to pull back.
For some reason you’ll probably never understand, you instinctively reach out to hold his arms to keep him in place. He looks at your hands and then back to your face curiously.
You quietly breathe out, “I also didn’t say to stop.”
Stiles breath hitches, his lips curving up just slightly before he dives towards your lips again.
This time you instantly kiss back, pulling him closer by cupping either side of his face, as his arms come to snake around your waist.
As the kiss becomes more intense, Stiles reluctantly pulls away for oxygen.
“We shouldn’t be doing this,” he murmurs breathlessly, pressing his forehead against yours.
“You started it,” you muse, chasing after his lips.
He laughs softly, letting you kiss him deeply another few minutes before he gently caresses your face, pulling away.
“And I don’t hate what we’re doing but it's also very out of character. For both of us.”
“To make out with a hot person?”
“No,” Stiles sighs, but can’t fight the blood rushing to his cheeks, “I mean making out with each other. Honestly, this whole night has been out of character. We normally can’t stomach being in each other’s vicinity for more than five minutes.”
“Well if you haven’t noticed, this activity doesn’t require a whole lot of talking so I’m finding it easier to tolerate you.”
You watch Stiles roll his eyes, trying to rationalize what’s happening between you two. So you take a deep breath.
“Look, we’re not going to suddenly stop despising each other but there’s nothing wrong with two consenting people having a little fun. And you know…probably never speaking about it again.”
Stiles shifts the weight between his feet, becoming overwhelmed by the situation and the possibilities of where it could go; possibilities that both scare and excite him. And he can’t figure out what emotion is winning out.
“This probably won’t come as a shock to you,” Stiles speaks up again quietly, not meeting your eyes, “But I’ve never really…been with a girl…like this.”
The corner of your lips curl up. It wasn’t new information, but there was something about seeing this boy who usually goes toe to toe in insults with you be so open and honest with you.
You place your hands over his where they still rest on either side of your face. “We don’t have to do anything you don’t want to do. We can go as far as you want. Or we can stop now and pretend like this never happened. You are more than welcome to go.”
“I don’t think I want to go,” Stiles whispers hoarsely.
“Then don’t go,” You whisper back, leaning closer again.
“You’d really want to do this too?”
“Yes-”
“Because I know why I want to but why do you want to? After the guy you were with this summer I would have thought you’d be more…selective.”
“Oh that's exactly what I’m doing.”
“And you want to be with me? Why?”
“Because unlike the last guy, I know what I’m getting with you Stiles,” You state simply, “You’re a good guy. This has no chance of going anywhere. Absolutely no feelings whatsoever to get in the way. It’s perfect.”
Stiles stares at you, taking in your expression for any sign of uneasiness or lies. But he can tell you’re dead serious. His skin starts to burn in anticipation.
“So we’re doing this,” He says softly, somewhere between a question or a statement.
“I’m in if you’re in.”
“We do this once and we never talk about it again.”
“Sounds like a plan.”
“And no one, and I mean no one finds out about this. I mean it, you can’t tell anyone.”
You scoff, “Trust me, I plan to take this to the grave. You should be more concerned with yourself. I can’t see you going five minutes without squealing to Scott that you’ve finally seen a girl naked.”
Stiles closes his eyes and groans, praying you can’t see him blush again. He also can’t even process the fact that he is indeed about to see a girl naked.
After a moment, Stiles finally says, “I don’t have to tell Scott everything.”
“Okay, if you really believe that.” He rolls his eyes, making you chuckle. “So are you game, Stilinski?”
Stiles’ eyes flit across your face, before settling back on your lips. “Fuck it.”
He kisses you deeply and the two of you tug at each other like your bodies are never close enough. Your hands wander over his body until they end up at the buttons of his flannel, and you haphazardly start to undo them before he pulls away briefly to help you get it off of him. He shivers as your cold fingertips trace the contours of his chest and stomach, but he doesn’t get a chance to linger on the feeling as you kiss him again. He takes his turn to pull off your jacket, before sliding his fingers under the hem of your shirt, which you help him maneuver over your head. You once again only let him have a few seconds to take in your exposed skin, only your bra separating you two from complete skin to skin contact, before you’re pulling him back to you again.
“Do you have…” you mutter against his skin as you start to kiss down his jaw and neck, “Protection?”
Stiles’ stomach twists with nerves and excitement as he nods. “Yeah, I have a condom in my wallet.”
You smile against his skin, trailing down to his collarbone, “Been hoping one day Lydia would want to jump your bones?”
Stiles groans, tangling his fingers into your hair, “God, shut up.”
You chuckle darkly before gently pushing against his chest so you can move onto your bed.
Time passes in a hazy blur as you and Stiles finish undressing each other between sloppy and heated kisses. You try to go at a moderate pace with him, despite your own eagerness. To your pleasant surprise, Stiles is a quick learner as you talk him through how to touch you and make you feel good. And he makes you feel very good. And despite his own timidness and learning curve, he is very attentive to your needs as well as your comfort levels, constantly checking in and making sure you’re okay.
You’re more than okay by the time you’re done, the two of you collapsing back onto the bed, sweaty and panting.
“Holy shit,” he breathes out staring at the ceiling.
You smirk, pulling the sheet up to cover yourself, “Yup.”
You lay in silence for a few moments as you catch your breaths before Stiles speaks again.
“I hope tonight makes us even, because I think that counts as two additional favors,” He says teasingly, but when you don’t immediately respond, his head turns to you quickly, “You finished both times right?”
You chuckle softly and nod, turning your head towards him as well, “I did.”
“Good,” he sighs in relief, “I did, too.”
“I know you did.”
Stiles rolls his eyes but laughs softly, “Right.”
“And I’d say I was the one doing the favor,” You muse, “Now the next time you find a girl willing to sleep with you, you’ve got some tricks up your sleeve.”
He huffs with a nod, “I guess you’re right.” Another few moments of silence pass between you when Stiles looks at you again, and asks softly, “But seriously, it was good for you?”
You roll your eyes, “Yes.”
“Like, you’re not just saying that to make me feel better?”
“When have I ever worried about preserving your feelings? Trust me, if it was bad or you were doing something wrong I would have told you.”
“Yeah I guess that’s true,” he sighs. Another beat. “But like on a scale of one to ten?”
“Stiles!”
“I know, I know.” he regresses. “Can I ask for real though - and full permission to punch me if this is insensitive - but compared to the last guy…was I better?”
He watches you stare at him blankly for a few seconds before he starts to back pedal. “Probably not right? He was probably way more experienced even if he..”
“This was better.”
He turns to you again in surprise.
“You were better.”
Stiles stutters, “R-really?”
You nod, “You’re not an asshole who only thinks about himself. Don’t ever lose that quality.”
Stiles smiles softly, his cheeks warming up again.
“Seriously, it was good. Great even,” You continue, “If that’s what you’re like with me, I can’t imagine how good it would be with a girl you actually like.”
That last statement was like a bucket of cold water splashing over him. Right. You guys hated each other. And you were still the same girl who made his life inexplicably harder this year. But those things were easy to forget while he stared at you, your messy hair splayed across your pillow, your bare skin lit by the soft glow of the candles in your room, with a few noticeable marks across your collarbone that he was responsible for.
But this would be the first and last time this ever happened. And he will probably have complicated feelings about it for the foreseeable future, knowing the memory of his first time will always connect him to you. But he surprisingly feels less guilty than he would have thought.
“I should probably go,” He whispers after another few seconds of taking her and the moment in. Part of him wishes he didn’t have to leave at all and continue living in this bubble of false reality and denial. But he thinks his brain takes over in an act of self preservation to get out of there before he gets in too deep.
“Yeah, you probably should,” You whisper back, taking a deep breath.
He watches you sit up, dragging the sheet covering you up with you. He sucks in a breath as you grab a dark purple robe off of your bedpost and slip it on, covering the rest of your body and taking the image away from him. With that, he also forces himself up, locating his boxers and jeans on the floor and pulling them on.
You circle your bed as he starts to pull on his flannel again. He feels nervous under your gaze, and about how to act right now, making him fumble with the buttons. Without a word, you reach out and slowly and quietly help him finish buttoning it. He takes this one last opportunity to watch your face at this level of proximity, knowing he’ll probably never have the chance to do that again.
As you finish the top button, you look up at his gaze still laser focused on you, and for some reason he doesn’t feel compelled to look away.
“Thank you for tonight,” You say softly with a small smirk playing at your lips, “Thought I just needed a protection spell after the summer I had, but I guess I needed that as well.”
Stiles feels himself smirk too, “Happy to be of service to both.”
You slide your hands across his chest, smoothing out his shirt before taking a deep breath and step back.
“So, business as usual? I’m sure we’ll run into each other again once Scott gets himself into some more supernatural shit, and we’ll be back at each other’s throats in no time.”
Stiles chuckles, “I look forward to it.”
You give him your version of a tiny genuine smile. “Do you need me to walk you out?”
He shakes his head, “I’m sure I can find my way.”
You nod, also taking in his appearance under the glow of the candles while you can. You decide to take the opportunity to close the distance between the two of you and kissing him chastely one last time.
Stiles closes his eyes and reciprocates automatically, but the kiss is over before its even begun. He watches you pull away from him, unable to tear his eyes away from yours.
“Goodnight, Stiles,” you whisper before stepping away and walking around him towards your desk again to clean up.
With his back towards you now, he smiles to himself, huffing in disbelief at the night he’s had.
“Goodnight,” He says back softly as he takes steps towards your door. He glances back at you one last time, before leaving and finding his way back downstairs and out your front door.
Once he shut the door after sliding into the driver's seat, he lets out a long deep breath and rubs his face. Losing his virginity to his self-proclaimed mortal enemy was not on his bingo card for the night - or ever. But the more he sits with it, the more he’s weirdly pleased that it happened. Honestly, it was like best case scenario. Figuring out sex with someone he’s not trying to impress - well, to a certain degree - took some of the pressure off. And now he doesn't have to think about it anymore. Unfortunately, it was really good. Extremely good. Too good to just have been a one time thing, and part of him is disappointed there’s no chance of ever experiencing it again.
It was for the best. The moment hell freezes over is when he’d have actual feelings past irritation and mild rage when it came to you. So he shakes his head, putting their night together behind him as he pulls out of your driveway.
Still in your bedroom, you lean against the wall watching him drive away from the window. You smile to yourself, having a sneaking feeling this wouldn’t be the last time the two of you do this. Stiles just didn’t know it yet.
author's note: dying to know what people think of this, not the type of stuff i usually write. firstly, sorry for the lack of steam, i've never written smut and not sure i ever will but hope it alluded to enough for yall. also again, took my witch idea and flipped it into an alternate universe where the reader is a lil evil. there are elements of the other pieces i'm writing that assumes similar lore/backstory for the witch, but in this version, you don't grow up as stiles & scott's bff, you're isolated leading to some villianous tendancies. i also know i hinted at a lot of back story with some pieces from seasons 1-2, with this ultimately taking place right before season 3. so i have some ideas of writing other parts that dive into some of those moments, plus more parts that come after this of course. so let me know what kind of stuff you're interested in seeing from evil!witch x stiles (evil being used pretty loosely) THANK YOU FOR READING!
#stiles stilinski fanfiction#stiles stilinski fanfic#stiles stilinski imagine#stiles stilinski x reader#stiles x witch!reader#cursed from the start#mine#my writing#teen wolf imagine#teen wolf fanfiction#teen wolf fanfic
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Hello!! Your aot fics are so adorable!! Especially that Eren one, I really loved it. Since you said you would expand on it in the future, I was wondering if you'd want to do something like they get into a fight or something? Maybe one of them gets too busy with work/classes and just ends up neglecting the other and it leads to some hurt but hey, they're soulmates. They find their way back. If not though, just some more college! Eren x best friend! Reader? I love it!!
This happened before they got together, a moment that made Eren realise he would rather chop an arm and a leg off than make his best friend upset again.
At the time, y/n had a falling out with her group of friends, a misunderstanding happened and one of them blamed her which made everyone else turn their backs on her and unfriend her.
Eren on the other hand was saving up money so he could spend the three months of summer break at a specific beach he wanted to surf at, so he was trying to balance long hours of school and work and whenever he had free time he was extremely tired and most likely sleeping. He didn't know what was going on with y/n, in fact, this was the longest they went without talking to each other. He's embarrassed to say this but he would've forgotten about her if it wasn't for the fact he was constantly getting notifications from her.
If he was honest, he did get annoyed, but he tried to ignore it all. She was bombarding him with calls and texts, asking him where he was and why he wasn't answering her. What he didn't know was that y/n was trying to seek comfort from the only person she knew wouldn't hurt her the way the people she used to call her friends did, and was panicking when he kept leaving her on read or delivered.
One evening, there was a frantic series of knocks on Eren's door which woke him up in a panic thinking something was wrong. He opened the door to find his best friend standing on the opposite side, a grin on her face, “Eren! I've been knocking for so long, why didn't you answer?”
He let out a shaky sigh when he realised nothing was wrong and let her in, “fuck, y/n... I thought something bad happened.”
“Probably has something to do with the fact you look like you haven't slept in a decade.” Y/n raised an eyebrow while taking off her shoes, “what's up with that ?”
She was trying her best to cover up the fact she was crying an hour ago. She stumbled across a picture that her ex best friend posted of all of her old friend group together with the caption that was clearly shady towards her. It made her have a full blown break down and she couldn't think about being with anyone after that other than her best friend.
Eren ignored what she said and tried to wipe the tiredness from his face. The day wasn't going well for him, he forgot to turn in his assignment, he messed up at work multiple times which made his boss scold him at the end of his shift, and many other things happened that ruined his day more and more. But he couldn't let her know, he didn't want to seem weak in front of her.
“Nothing, just... Long day.”
He sighed when she took a seat on his couch, he was hoping to finish his nap at least until dinnertime, but it seemed like she had other plans.
“Sooo, What have you been up to? other than ignoring my texts and calls.”
“You know I wouldn't ignore you on purpose, y/n.” he murmurs softly, a hint of frustration present in his tone.
She shrugs, arms folded tightly across her chest as though she was holding herself together. She thought after spending over an hour crying she would stop feeling so emotional, but clearly she thought wrong because a new wave of emotions hit her again. She can feel her throat tighten and the sting of tears pricking her eyes once more.
“I don't know, you've left me on read a lot for someone who's not doing it on purpose,” she mumbles and looks away from him, a slight tremble in her voice, “but why did I expect more, since that seems to be the treatment I'm getting from everyone.”
“alright listen,” The sudden shift in his tone made her head snap towards him, his voice was sharper now, she never heard him talk to her like that before, “I don't know what bullshit made you catch an attitude, but I'm not in the mood to tolerate it. You've got plenty of friends so go complain to them instead of bothering me, god!”
She watched him with wide eyes as he slumped back against the couch and threw an arm over his eyes followed by a long and frustrated sigh. She couldn't hold back anymore and silently let the tears go. She never expected such harsh words to come from Eren, someone who she trusted to never break her heart and hurt her She went to stand up, but he quickly put his other arm out to stop her,
“No, sit down, we have a lot of talking to do.”
“There's nothing else to say-” she tried to say while holding back her son's, but he cut her off.
“I need to apologise, so sit.”
She wiped the tears from her cheeks despite the fact she was still crying. He removed his arm from his face and sat up to face her. He could tell now that something happened that led to what she said, and he needed to get to the bottom of it, but he needed to address his actions first.
“I'm sorry I said that, I promise you I don't mean any word that came out of my mouth,” he gently took her hand in his, and she let him, too weak to fight him off, “I've just had a rough day, everything that could possibly go wrong did and it all pissed me off.”
She nodded and opened her mouth to speak, but he lifted his free hand, stopping her gently. He held her gaze to make sure he had her full attention before he continued speaking.
“With that being said, I shouldn't have let it out on you and I am willing to apologise a million times to show how much I regret my actions.”
“No it's okay, once is enough,” her voice was strained as she tried to keep her emotions in control so she wouldn't burst out in sobs, "it's just-” she looked down at their interviewing hands and sniffed, “I've had a couple of bad days, so many things kept piling up and you weren't with me like usual,” her voice broke, unable to hold back anymore as the tears flew down, “I felt so alone.”
Eren's heart shattered at the sight of her breaking down and immediately wrapped his arms around her to pull her to his chest, “shh, it's okay, let it all out, I've got you now.”
He let her cry for as long as she needed, offering her comforting touches and words, and slipping an apology here and there because despite her telling him one was enough, he still felt very guilty over what he said and as she told him what happened with her friend group and all the horrible things she heard them say behind her back, his guilt grew so heavy it brought tears to his eyes.
His best friend, his sweet angel, his entire world, how could anyone think she would do anything to hurt others? One time she felt bad because she didn't turn on her TV for over a month and she didn't want it to feel useless, how would someone who thought that try to harm a close friend of hers? He felt so mad, so angry, how could he not? They hurt his most precious person.
He tried to comfort her in any way he could to make up for the days he wasn't there, and it seemed like being held and heard was all she wanted from him, so he did, the only time he separated from her was to pick up the food delivery. She ended up spending the night and fell asleep on his chest after venting her heart out to him.
As he held her sleeping body close to his, he started thinking about all their previous arguments, and how they always resolved them on the spot, never going to sleep mad at each other. That ended up being brought up in a conversation while he was out with friends and how he doesn't like making or seeing her upset because he could physically feel her pain, like he was the one hurting.
“damn bro, that's some soulmates shit,” Connie said before taking a huge bite of the fried chicken they were eating but kept his mouth open to cool it down while huffing "ah fuck, too hot" which made Eren laugh.
“he's right though,” Armin chimes in, a soft smile on his face, “remember when you got mad at each other and stormed off but ended up both going to the same spot? Or how you both caught the flu at the same time even though you were in two different cities? Or how she was out of town but knew something bad happened to you when you broke your leg? I don't think those are normal things that happen to everyone.”
Soulmates... Yeah, they're right. He couldn't describe them in any better way. They're meant for each other, whether they like it or not.
#���ᡣ𐭩 requested story#ᯓᡣ𐭩 beloved's stories#divider by v6que#aot x reader#aot x you#aot x y/n#aot x female reader#aot x fem!reader#eren x reader#eren x y/n#eren x you#eren x female reader#eren x fem!reader#eren jeager x y/n#eren jeager x you#eren jeager x reader#eren jeager x fem!reader#eren jeager x female reader#aot fanfic#aot fluff#aot angst#eren jeager#eren fluff#eren jeager angst#eren jeager fluff#eren angst#self insert#best friend!eren#college student! eren#best friends to lovers
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Chapter 4: Girl U Want
[can also be read on AO3]
Summary: Rory and Nikolai are forced to hold off an attack on Botha's life, and its the return of an enemy the 141 has faced previously
Warnings/Tags: Minors DNI, canon-typical violence, swearing, stabbing, wound tending, flirting via facetime
Pairing: Captain John Price x Fem!OC - 3rd person POV (Rory Sinclair)
Word Count: 3.5 K
A/N: the further continuation of Rory's story, this follows and expands upon the COD: MW2 reboot canon. Told from Rory's POV. allusions are made to the mission "Recon by Fire", and it's the first appearance of Gaz in this fic!
October 29 2022 11:30 - Abidjan, Republic of Côte d'Ivoire
Weapons fire riddled the building, streaks of daylight breaking through the pinholes pricked through the walls. Bullets ricocheted, carving trenches into the wood panelling, popping the twinkling bulbs of the string lights and blowing through the speakers causing them to smoke and sputter out sparks while the music died with a low, tortured warble.
The barkeeper ran for the backrooms, hiding out from the sudden burst of violence at his establishment, while Nik took cover by the door and Rory grabbed the edge of the table she was taking cover under with Botha, pulling it down hastily to flip it on its side, forming a barrier against the onslaught of lead being fired at them. “Fucking hell!” she snapped, tugging at her jacket to get the material off of her. Slipping her handgun from the now easily accessible holster strapped to her shoulder, she called across the bar room, “How much ammo have you got, Nik?” “However much they bring in,” he replied, tipping his head in the direction of the small force of soldiers headed in their direction, wearing matching outfits to the body that lay on the floor below the broken window.
Popping up out of cover, Rory took a brief moment to get a better look at what she was dealing with. Counting heads, checking what sort of firepower they were bringing down on her.
“Bugger me sideways,” she muttered, dropping back down. “I count at least twelve heads out there, some of them armoured with plates, all carrying ARs.”
Last time the 141 had come up against Konni it wasn’t out in the open like this, they weren’t so obvious, they were disguised as police officers and paramedics. Apparently they’d dropped those rules of engagement when it came to dealing with a quick severing of a loose end.
“Pick off the ones we can with what we’ve got,” she ordered, “Try to get them to waste their ammo on the way in, and we get close and personal as a last resort.”
“Close and personal with those fokkers?” Botha cocked his brow at her, less than impressed with her commands, staring at her as if she had gone mad.
“We wouldn’t be in this bloody mess if not for you. So kindly keep your gobby trap shut, and get into cover behind that bar so I have one less thing to worry about,” she barked before scuttling out of cover and patting down the body on the floor.
Besides the blood that now stained her hands, she managed to collect a smoke grenade and stashed it on her as well as the handgun strapped to his leg. It wasn’t much, but every bit of assistance was critical in a one-sided fight like this where the odds weren’t necessarily in their favour.
Crawling up to the window ledge, she peeked her head up and more bullet fire went off, tearing chunks out of the walls. Ducking quickly, she glanced over at Nik. “Right. That’s it. On me.” She gave the signal and he was quick to follow her lead.
Bullets volleyed back and forth, seeming to last forever, the car park becoming a war zone as casings tinkled on the hard cement, muzzles flared and sparked in the midday, and innocent civilians in the vicinity ran to take cover. Urban combat situations had always been her least favourite type of battle ground. Too many things could go wrong, too many variables left out of her control. Things could get bloody, brutal. And fast.
Despite the ferocity of the firefight – projectiles tearing into clothing, kevlar, and wood – when the dust finally settled, enough of an invasion force of highly skilled soldiers still remained.
Sharp shots of pain emanated down Rory’s arm from the pulsating, burning ache of her shoulder that was nowhere near ready to be dragged into a hand-to-hand combat situation. But alas, here she was. She caught herself reaching for the area where the left pocket of her tac vest usually sat carrying her brass knuckles, patting the phantom material and sighing. Unfortunately, in this case, she’d come ill prepared for such an eventuality. The carbon of her empty handgun would have to stand-in improvisationally.
As the first Konni operatives breached their makeshift fortress, Rory hung back, slipping into the dark hallway before rolling the smoke grenade into the middle of the room, using the element of surprise as an asset. Tucking the material of her shemagh up over her mouth and nose, she watched as grey smoke pumped into the room, coiling wisps of it curling up towards the ceiling and spreading out towards every corner. The compact room now a foggy mess, with limbs protruding from it cartoonishly as soldiers coughed and sputtered. Grabbing her jacket left crumpled on the floor, she moved silently into the masses. Wrapping the material around one of the enemy’s necks, twisting it tighter, the body in her arms acted as a human shield and her jacket the reins. Like a battering ram, she used the gasping soldier, clawing at his throat while choking for air and sucking back smoke, to break through the group of operatives.
Tossing him back against the counter, slamming her knee up into his solar plexus, she rammed the gun repeatedly into his face with each forceful punch in the nose. Hot blood shooting out from his nostrils sprayed across her knuckles like the last glob of brown sauce from the bottle splattering onto the plate. Whipping the weapon back and forth against his face, the metallic stench hit her nostrils, struck by the coppery taste that followed sucking on a penny as she let the body slip free and slump to the floor.
Out of the corner of her eye, she caught the streak of an unidentified flying object passing by, only to be met by a heavy crack and a groan from the other side of the room. Splinters from a chair hurled by Nik at the face of one of the Konni operatives scattered the floor and toothpick shrapnel blew out in all directions. The solid remains of the wooden chair quickly picked up and tossed like a shot put at another man’s back by the Russian, winding them.
In the confusion, she was grabbed from behind, a large arm compressing her waist and squeezing. Entirely thankful for her sparring practice with Ghost, Rory found her entry, her elbow connecting under the operative’s ribs, notching beneath plates and bone to find the soft middle. Sliding the tactical knife from his vest as his grip loosened, she shoved it up and into his armpit, stabbing at the axillary artery deep within the socket joint, carving away at him as the blade disappeared into layers of clothing, muscle, and flesh, only to reappear dripping in syrupy claret.
Each stab became simultaneously easier and more difficult as she continued to spear with abandon, the penetration lubricated, but the marrow deep throb in her shoulder made her grit her teeth with each grate of her bones through the muscle and tendon. Biting back a pain-induced moan, meeting with the chorus of grunts and wails of the man bleeding out on the floor, his ragged wheeze gave way to hitched breaths and then a wet, gurgling scream.
Wiping the arterial spray from her face with her arm, her attention moved back to the bar. Botha might have been shit about following her orders before, but he was certainly paying attention now that his life was dangling from a knife’s edge – literally so, in this case. Hidden behind the wooden structure, he hadn’t popped up like a prairie dog yet, maintaining his position under cover instead. She wasn’t all that surprised he wasn’t playing hero, he’d already promised he was out to cover his own arse before anyone else’s. She moved through the ruckus and grabbed a bottle from the bar, tsking her tongue at the poor quality of the stuff served on premise, before smashing it against the wood countertop and slashing outwards towards the sound of the cracking tile under the weight of heavy boots behind her. Failing to land a hit, one large hand gripped tightly in her hair, her head slammed into the bar for her efforts, face dragged against the shattered glass littering the counter. A hoarse yell tore through her throat with the same shearing effect as the broken shards ripping through her skin. Wet, hot anger spilling forth from her veins drove her defense, and the bottle in her hand was promptly slammed into his thigh. Twisting it, she dug the jagged edges into the skin left, then right.
“Сука!” The expletive was spat in her ear as she delivered the pendulum swing of torment to his leg and the back of her head collided with his teeth in a one-two punch causing the x ray to stumble back.
Teeth bared, saliva stained pink, she smashed the broken bottle into his face, followed by a decisive punch to his throat. Fragile bone crunched and cracked under the force she used, crushing the windpipe. A slow, painful death at the hands of prey animal rage.
Her heart raced, her senses numbed, her vision tunnelled to lock onto her targets. The blood thundered in her ears so intensely it felt like even her eyes were pulsating with each thump through the capillaries that fed them. Once the adrenaline wore off, she’d start feeling every wind up and hit.
Tomorrow would be hell.
Rory hissed and vaulted over the bar, grabbing a scoop of ice in a handful along the way, and held it to her shoulder. The numbing sting to her fingertips was almost a comfort – at least one part of her didn’t feel like it was falling apart. Blood streamed down her cheeks in rivulets where she wiped the bits of glass away with her arm. She was a mess, tattered and torn, her breathing made more difficult with the smoke that still floated in the air.
Her focus was set on the weapons dealer sitting on the floor with his knees to his chest and his gun in his hands, finger left curled over the trigger. Glaring at him and the waste of perfectly good ammo clutched in his grip, she scoffed.
“Don’t tell me you don’t know how to use your own bloody product.”
He glanced over at her, sweat dribbling down his forehead and soaking his brow despite never lifting a finger. “Course I do. But I’m not some bloody soldier, am I? This is for protection,” he said, shaking the gun in his hands. “It's defensive.”
“Defensive, my arse. It’s a gun.” She held out her hand for him to willingly place the weapon into, directing him with the curl of her fingers. “Hand it over.”
Snatching the weapon from him, she checked the clip. Completely unused. “Might’ve come in handy if you’d made this available earlier,” she grumbled, slotting the gun back together. “Stay here.”
Crawling around the edge of the bar, she peeked around the corner, the force they had to contend with earlier had mostly been cut down, just the last few stragglers left who refused to go down. The heavies who had likely faced the same sort of environmental and physical survival training she had been through, the kind that taught a person to push through the pain.
Lining up her shots, she took a steadying breath, her arm shaking under the strain of her shoulder. There was no point in going for fancy, it was better to go for effective, leaving her to shoot each enemy soldier in the chest.
The rapid succession of weapons fire cut through the sounds of savagery, fists pummeling into skin and muscle. The ear-piercingly loud bang of each burst of gunfire was deafening in the small bar as each target left standing was taken down.
Ensuring no one was getting back up, Rory peeked out the open frame of the window, checking for anyone still waiting outside. But, just like upon arrival, it was a ghost town besides the bodies left to linger in the graveyard of the car park. “Right, coast is clear. Nik, mind grabbing Botha for me? The arm’s out of commission and our guest needs to be handed off.”
Without question, the Russian reached down over the bar and dragged Botha to his feet, his hand gripping the other man’s collar like an animal’s scruff. “You heard the Lieutenant. No point in arguing.”
Swinging open the front door, walking out into the parking lot, Rory checked back over her shoulder. “Think you can get a clean up crew on this, Nik?”
He shrugged, his lower lip curling into a pout as he debated it. “Not a problem.”
“I see why Price keeps you on speed dial now,” she said, smirking back at him.
October 29 2022 16:00 - Safehouse
A cigarette dangled from her bottom lip, the smoke curling in the humid room with the thickness of paste as she paced back and forth in the bedroom. The door left ajar, allowing her an eyeline to where Botha sat in an old armchair in the other room, swigging back on a bottle of beer. Everything remained sweat slicked in the cramped apartment. Clothes damp, made worse with the weight of a quickly thawing bag of freezer burnt frozen peas that had been there for God knows how long draped over her shoulder, the plastic bag crinkling and crackling with every movement as she got in contact with the CIA operative Laswell had linked her up with for the transfer of the arms dealer in question to place him under protection.
The meeting was set for the next day, which gave them more than enough time for a quick patch up job before she’d finally get to return to Stirling Lines and have to deal with Sydney – or rather, Dr. Macallen as she was known now – tearing into her for living too dangerously. Rory was a far cry from the stick in the mud corporal Syd had once known. Only had herself to blame for that, really. If Syd hadn’t invited her out for drinks that night on leave, Rory would never have wound up meeting John.
With the call over, Rory walked out into the living room, closing the bedroom door behind her. The TV played at a quiet hum, the voices a droning whisper as they went over the latest sports scores on the news – English Premier League. It was like she had hardly left home at all. Tossing her mobile down on the empty seat of the couch beside Nikolai, she headed for the tiny bathroom.
Musty and dark, she flipped on the switch and was met by the sight of herself battered and bruised. Her cheek suffered the appearance of road rash, the skin raw and ragged with sliver-sized abrasions. Sighing, she stubbed out her cigarette in the basin and grabbed a cloth, rinsing it under the flowing water at the tap. Hunched in front of the mirror, she pressed the cold, wet cloth to her cheek, and with a hissed inhale between clenched teeth, let it moisten the dried and clotted blood that clung to her flesh, loosening it in order to slough it away.
The sting was the worst part, like a million little paper cuts all biting at her whenever touched by even the faintest of breezes. That same prickling twinge that chased up the nerves after nicking her leg in the shower with her razor but repeated again and again.
Could’ve been worse, she thought to herself, wiping away the flecks of blood. At least it didn’t look like it would leave a scar. Her shoulder, on the other hand, was going to have to be looked at again. Hell, might even force her to have to get surgery on it this time. Rory shuddered. Nursemaid Price was hardly something to look forward to. She was never a fan of how much of a stickler he was for the stringent schedule of taking her proper medications, handing out the correct dosage just shy of the little certified paper cup, and making sure to take them with food when required. She dreaded catching a cold when he was about, it made him twice the mother hen he already was.
Leaning down, she splashed water on her face and turned off the faucet, grabbing the first aid kit tucked away to bandage herself up when she heard the faint vibrations of her phone on the couch in the other room.
“It’s Price!” Nik’s low boom carried over to her as she aligned the gauze on her cheek, gluing it down with the available medical tape.
“Leave it. I’ll ring him back.”
Or not.
The muffled sound of Nik greeting her partner over the phone made her groan. Bloody hell. As long as it wasn’t the usual video call her and Price took part in during the evenings. Coming out into the living room, she realized she had been far too hopeful, catching a glimpse of piercing blue eyes on the screen of her mobile.
“What the hell happened, Ror?” Price’s voice thundered.
She sighed and walked over to Nik, snatching the mobile from his hand. “Thank you so much for that,” she muttered to the Russian quietly before heading back into the bedroom.
With the door firmly shut behind her, she continued, “Ran into a spot of trouble. Apparently the missiles Hassan has weren't just a gift from the Russians.” She paused, sucking her teeth, waiting for the inevitable gruff growl as she dropped another thing in the Captain’s lap. “It’s Konni, John. They came for Botha.”
“Konni? As in Makarov? That Konni?” he snarled.
“Exactly that, yeah.” Nodding, her eyes fluttered shut as she winced and took a seat on the edge of the bed.
His eyes narrowed at her through the screen, at the way she grazed her hand against the bandage on her cheek absentmindedly. “You okay, sweetheart?” The distinct growl remained in his voice, but the way he looked at her softened.
“Just a few scratches, nothing to fuss over. Should see the other guys,” she added with a smirk.
He sighed and dragged his hand down his jaw, rubbing at the scruffy whiskers on his cheeks and the stubble on his chin. “Fucking hell.” His voice a low rasp, “How’d they get their hands on American missiles?”
“Don’t know yet,” she said with a shrug. “I’m playing catch up with all this just the same, love. I’m giving you answers as soon as I get them.”
“Somethin’ for us to keep an eye out for in Spain then. Wonder if Konni will be joinin’ in with the narcos and AQ,” he muttered. “Bloody brilliant.”
His snide tone not going unnoticed, the corner of her mouth started to curl into a half grin as she bit back on it. “Careful, you’re starting to sound just as sarcastic as I do.”
Brushing a hand through his hair, the lines in his face deepened as a smirk crept up on him. “Learned from the best, I s’pose.”
“You did, indeed.”
On the screen, dark hair popped up from behind Price’s shoulder, along with a toothy grin, as the Captain’s young protege leaned into frame. “There’s the missus,” Gaz goaded. “How are we this evening, Lamb?”
It didn’t take a genius to note that she had clearly been through the mill considering the bandage on her cheek stained with blooming rust.
“Just peachy.”
“Sure looks it.”
“Sod off,” Price gruffed, elbowing the sergeant out of the way.
Rory laughed. “What’s got our Gaz with a pep in his step?”
“Ghillie suits,” he replied flatly.
“Ghillie suits, eh?” Her brow lifted and she couldn’t stop the shit eating grin that pulled at her mouth. “Well, let’s just hope you aren’t left picking clay out of your beard like last time. I’m not there to suds you up and trim your whiskers, am I?”
Price rolled his eyes, his face stern as he sighed – a quiet grouse at her constant teasing. But that didn’t hide the pinkish hue invading his cheeks. With a sharp clearing of his throat, the cold, resolute Captain returned. “And what about Botha?”
“What about him?”
“Nearly washed your hands of ‘im yet?”
“Nearly,” she said, glancing at the door, looking forward to being free of the burden. “Hand off is tomorrow, then Nik’ll fly me back to Stirling Lines. Can only imagine how much paperwork in triplicate is waiting for me there.”
“The life of an officer,” he mused, heavy brow furrowing.
“Yeah, almost forgot that was part of it. Wanted to stay far away from a desk job, and now look at me.”
“It suits you, Lieutenant.”
“Thank you, Captain,” she said, purring out his rank as if it were an endearment.
“And sweetheart’?” His powder blues locking onto her, the way they would when he was uttering a command. “Just make sure it’s not Nik greetin’ me on the screen tonight when I call again, yeah?”
She snickered, the implication clear about the type of call it might be. “Will do.”
“Tha’s my good girl.”
“I’ll see you later, my darling.” And with the blow of a kiss at the screen, she ended the call.
#call of duty#cod fanfic#cod mw2#cod nikolai#john price#kyle gaz garrick#oc: rory sinclair#oc: niel botha#skelly writes#fic: shadow dance#chapter 4
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brb just rereading katherine and sadie high on molly and losing my shit when katherine says "you're all i think about." while sadie fucks her. like @harrietdyker really out here murdering me
#so many moments of that fic have fucked me up#confessing 'you're gonna cost me my prenup' at her not to her#sadie actively pushing intimate thoughts out of her head while katherine won't shut up#yes please gimme that everyday#sadie x katherine
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The boy stops in his tracks. “I know you,” he says, tilting his head curiously. He’s not tall, but he’s regal nonetheless, dressed all in white. Something about him makes Leia’s hair stand on end, and although she hides it she feels a stirring in her own chest. I know you like I know my own soul, she thinks wildly, and wonders where it came from. Has she gone insane?
“That’s nice,” she says, and shoots him anyway.
He deflects it in a flash of light, a glowing blue laser sword appearing in his hand like magic. She’s only seen one of those before, and it’s Vader’s. If this boy is anything like Vader, she realizes, she’s in deep shit.
She’s smart enough to know when she’s outmatched. Leia makes the tactical decision to run for her life.
Later, as she’s getting the hell out of there, she wonders why he didn’t try to stop her.
She remembers being young and tugging on her mothers skirts, demanding to know why their guest was so sad. “Does he not like it here?” She’d asked, and then, trembling, because Kenobi always seemed saddest around her. “Is it…because of me?”
“Oh, Leia,” her mother sighed, lifting her into her arms. “It’s not that, I promise.”
“Then what is it?”
“Master Kenobi lost a child under his care, years ago.” Breha’s eyes grew deeper, darker. “It was not his fault, but he blames himself. You remind him of that child, that’s all.”
Leia had quieted at that, contemplative.
The next time she’d seen Master Kenobi, she had given him a hug. He didn’t seem to know what to do with that, so she resolved to give him more of them. “He’s lonely,” she’d told her mother. “No one should be lonely.”
Looking at Obi-Wan Kenobi now, the memory seemed so far away. He’d aged thirty years in the ten it had been.
He looks, Leia thinks with a small twinge of regret, very lonely.
“Leia,” he greets. “It’s been a long time.”
Out of the corner of her eye, Leia sees a glint of white.
Kenobi freezes in his tracks. “Luke?” He whispers, and through the distance Leia can hear it as if he’d been speaking directly into her ear.
Master Kenobi lost a child under his care, her mother whispers in her head. He blames himself.
In an instant, Leia understands everything.
Kenobi is still staring at the boy he’d lost so long ago when Vader cuts him down.
Later, as she’s pacing around on the Falcon to Han muttering darkly about Princesses and supernatural abilities, she rememberers the way the boy collapsed, as if all his strings had been cut. Vader was too occupied with him to even look at her as she shot at him desperately.
Luke. She hates him more than she hates herself.
“They know where you are,” he hisses frantically. “They’re coming for you. You have to run.”
“Wait!” Leia quickly pulls up their sonar. Nothing yet, but it would explain the distant queasiness she’d felt since they’d landed. She tended to trust her gut. “How do you know? How much time do we have?”
“Not important, and not enough,” he says. “I have to go, and so do you. You need to leave yesterday.”
“How do I know I can trust you? I don’t even know who you are.”
He pauses. “Call me Skywalker.”
“That’s not an answer, Skywalker.”
“Yes it is.”
She opens her mouth to argue, but there are faint voices on the other end, drawing nearer.
“Shit,” Skywalker mutters. “I have to go. I’ll be in contact, okay? Don’t ever tell me where you are, or where you’re heading. Vader and Palpatine aren’t shy about reading minds. Just leave as soon as you can, and figure out the rest.”
“But—“
It’s too late. The comm has disconnected.
She stares down at it, disbelieving. How would the Empire know they’re here? Why should she trust a stranger who somehow got her personal comm code?
Gut feeling or not, on paper this was a perfect location. Supplied, armored, and most importantly, extremely well hidden. There was no real reason to think it would possibly be found out.
It’s probably a trap. Almost definitely a trap.
Han sticks his head in the door, a sour look on his face. “Hey Princess, can you tell these idiots—“
She makes a decision then and there.
“We’re leaving.”
“What?”
“We’re evacuating, effective immediately.” She pushes past him, and he follows so close he’s nearly stepping on her heel.
“Why? I think it’s pretty cozy here. Actual sunlight doesn’t hurt, either.”
“Apparently too cozy.” She grabs the first person she sees, a pilot who stares at her with wide eyes. “Emergency evacuation. Spread the word to pack everything you can and leave, I’ll let you know where we’re headed when we’re in orbit.”
He salutes and scurries off.
“Woah, hey now.” Han snatches at her elbow until she turns around to face him. “What’s going on?”
“There’s a new informant. He told me the Empire knows we’re here. They’re coming for us.”
“And you trust this person because…”
“I don’t have a choice,” she snaps. Someone runs past them, holding three packs filled to the brim with rations. “It’s either he’s lying and we’re not in danger, or he’s telling the truth and we’re going to die if we don’t listen. It’s not exactly hard math.”
It could be a trap of course, but he hadn’t suggested any sort of direction or destination to follow, and Leia wasn’t inclined to share. Especially not after his tidbit about Vader and Palpatine reading minds.
He squints at her. “That’s not it.”
“What?”
“I don’t believe you,” he insists. He’s so infuriating. Leia doesn’t know why she hasn’t kicked him out yet.
“I don’t know what you’re talking about.”
“Yes you do, and you’re either gonna tell me why, or find a different transport when we head out of here.”
“Who said I was riding on your hunk of junk?” She demands. She actually was planning on going with them, since the Falcon has more than enough room for all the supplies that can’t fit in the other ships and none of the trustworthiness of the other pilots, but Han doesn’t need to know that.
“Well?”
Damn him. Damn him for knowing how to read her. She doesn’t know when she let that happen.
“I feel it,” she admits, defeated. “Something tells me he’s trustworthy. We’ll wait and see if it’s right.”
He studies her. She holds her head high, but inside she’s jittery at the scrutiny. They don’t have time for this.
“Yeah, all right,” Han finally says.
“Really?”
“Yes, really.” He rolls his eyes, like she’s not acting absolutely insane by putting all her trust in a random man she’s never even met. “Now come on, Princess, weren’t you the one who said we had to hurry?”
What is it about this man that makes it impossible to tell whether she wants to punch him or drag him into the nearest supply closet? They don’t have time to find out.
“So there’s good news and bad news.”
“Bad news first,” she demands.
“They know there’s a mole.”
“Shit.” Of course they know, how could they not? She should have been more careful, less obvious about the correlation of their movements with the Empire’s plans. “The good news?”
“They’ve tasked me with hunting down this ‘pathetic rebel spy,’” Skywalker says, humor in his voice. “That should buy me some time.”
Leia can’t quite stop the snort she lets out. “Seriously?”
“Yep. You’re speaking to a professional mole-hunter, here.”
“Well congratulations on the promotion, Skywalker.”
“Thank you,” he says grandly. Then, quieter, “It won’t last, Princess. They’ll find out eventually.”
“I know. Just hang in there, it will be over soon.”
“Will it?” He asks, suddenly sounding very young. She realizes that she has no idea how old he is. She doesn’t know anything about the man who has saved them more times than she cared to admit, and the idea rattles her until they sign off.
Later, she looks up the name Skywalker in their archives. There are a few results, but only one sticks out.
Anakin Skywalker, Jedi Knight and hero of the Clone Wars. Killed at the hands of Darth Vader. There are gossip articles too, speculations on his relationship with the pregnant Senator Padmé Amidala, who died around the same time Skywalker did. The baby, it seems, died with her.
Unless he didn’t.
It’s ridiculous. It’s impossible. The idea is so ludicrous that Leia almost rejects it entirely.
But it makes sense. By the Maker, it makes sense.
The child of Anakin Skywalker, it seems, would be a powerful Force user indeed. Powerful enough for Kenobi to take the baby and run. Powerful enough for the Emperor to want him for his own gain. Powerful enough to send Vader after Kenobi and take the boy himself.
Maybe even powerful enough to shield his mind from Vader and Palpatine’s intrusions.
Powerful enough to hide the fact that he’s a spy.
Leia sinks into her chair, covering her face as she laughs.
Maybe Luke isn’t so bad after all.
“No, no, no,” she mutters, digging through the smoking wreckage of the TIE fighter. “Don’t be dead, please don’t be dead.”
“Princess…” Han lays a hand on her shoulder that she immediately shrugs off.
“No, he’s not dead. He’s not. Luke!”
A faint cough answers her, and she’s so relieved to hear it she could cry. Behind her, Han starts bellowing for a medic and, “Some damn help here, do you expect us to move all this ourselves?”
“Luke, it’s me,” she sobs. “It’s Leia. You’re at the Rebel Base. You’re safe.”
More coughing, and there’s a worrying rasp to his voice when he says, “You know…my name?”
“I figured it out.”
“Smart.” This time, the coughing is so bad Leia and Han both wince.
“Shit, kid,” Han says, moving another piece of rubble. “Don’t talk. We’re gonna get you out of here, all right?”
“Stand back,” Luke chokes out.
“What?”
“Stand back. Please.”
Han protests, but something in Leia knows they should listen to him. She drags him back, and motions everyone else to fall back with them. They do, albeit reluctantly.
“Clear,” she calls, hoping Luke can hear her.
The TIE explodes.
“Fuck!” Han goes back in, Leia on his heels with the terrifying feeling that she’d just allowed Luke to die, before they both stop in their tracks. Around them, the broken pieces of the TIE are floating.
And curled up in the middle is a man dressed all in white.
“Luke!” She pushes past Han to start dragging him out, and after another moment of staring around them, he helps her.
As soon as they get clear, the pieces fall to the ground with a clatter. Luke falls limp with them.
Han is still looking at the TIE. “Can you do that?” He asks quietly.
Leia pauses her examination of the unconscious man in front of her to glare at him. “Is that what you’re most concerned with right now? Really?”
“Excuse me for asking, Princess!”
“It’s white,” Luke grumbles, pulling at his hospital gown bitterly. “I hate wearing white.”
“Should I be offended?”
He rolls his eyes. “Don’t even. You look great and you know it. I just feel like I never left.”
“Well,” she says gingerly. “I guess it’s a good thing you got sick of it. If we went around in matching outfits all the time, people might think we’re twins.”
He snorts. “Yeah, right.”
#star wars#star wars fanfiction#luke skywalker#han solo#leia organa#imperial luke skywalker#exactly when luke was taken by the empire is totally up to speculation it could honestly be anywhere from newborn to 5#as for why luke has his dad’s blue lightsaber here instead of like a red one or smth- well you see your honor I thought it would be a slay#but also when you think about it for more than 5 seconds you’re like actually yeah that’s sick and twisted of palpatine and vader actually#you’re carrying your fathers most treasured weapon#you don’t know your father once fought the rise of the very empire you stand to inherit with that blade. you don’t know who he defended#you don’t know your father brought about the end of the republic with that same weapon#he killed the younglings with it. he fought his closest companion with it#you’re carrying what was once your fathers most treasured weapon. you are your fathers most treasured weapon#just as your father is a weapon now#also I didn’t make it clear but obi-wan has his ‘strike me down and I become stronger’ moment like he still dies on purpose to cause proble#but when he saw luke he couldn’t look away. he had to see him with living eyes one last time#can u tell I had So Many Thoughts on everyone else’s perspective in this fic too#han is having a constant crisis in the background because 1) force is real 2) princess is annoying AND pretty which sucks for him#in particular and 3) pretty princess is learning to use the force and is hot while doing it. Chewie is laughing at him. life is hell#good lord did not mean to put an entire essay in the tags. i love their super special twin powers (cosmic entity that binds their souls)#edit: GUYS I FORGOT TO NAME THE FUCKING AU#AND WHEN I TRY AND FIX IT IT GLITCHES OUT ON MEEE 😭😭😭
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For reasons to be expanded upon at a later date (because I love the little bits about Boothill and possible paranoia/betrayal canon gives us so very dearly HNGH) I think Boothill like... He won't let himself fall into disrepair or anything of course, but he reeeeeeeeeeally does not like letting other people poke around at his body. It's a necessary evil to him. He does whatever maintenance and repairs he can himself. He started out with a massive knowledge deficit, simply because he didn't really have any exposure to that kind of technology until he left Aeragan-Epharshal, but he's taught himself a lot since then, he worked really hard at it!
Anyway, the point being, Boothill generally isn't super trusting of people.
But I think he would come to make an exception for Himeko, since he trusts Dan Heng a lot, and Himeko is one of Dan Heng's once-in-a-lifetime dearly beloved companions.
Himeko is so unflappable, I don't think she would even bat an eye about anything he throws at her, either. Like she enters the Parlor Car one morning (she's always the first one up) and Boothill is already there, waiting for her.
"Mornin', Madam Navigator."
"Good morning, Mr. Boothill."
And despite the fact that he blatantly broke into the Express (Pom-Pom is NOT happy about this JDKSAJDSKL), Boothill tips his hat, greets her politely, and is nothing but respectful when he says he has a favor to ask of her. Except it won't stay a favor long, of course- he has every intention of paying it back.
Himeko never agrees to things blindly, but she does bring up that all the knowledge Boothill contributed during the Charmony Festival was essential to preventing the universe from being pulled into Ena's Dream. And they were able to hold onto the Jade Abacus because Boothill used Tiernan's burial relic to summon the Galaxy Rangers instead. The Astral Express owes him a debt of gratitude, and besides, he's a friend of Dan Heng's. Of course she'll try to help him.
Boothill fidgets a bit, quickly brushes off the thanks, and tells Himeko he's having a problem with error codes. He keeps getting the same one, seemingly at random times, but the darn thing has no obvious cause. Dan Heng mentioned Himeko had been the one to rebuild the Astral Express. He knows it ain't the same, but it's not like he's askin' for any major repairs or nothin'. He was wonderin' if she could just take a look, maybe offer him some insight, since she seems to be somethin' of a mechanical wonder.
So Himeko walks him back to a another car, where she goes to tinker with machines without them crowding her bedroom. It's all neatly laid out and organized, and it only takes a second for Himeko to locate some specific device with a long cord. Instead of plugging it in herself, she holds the end of it out to him, like an offer rather than a demand, and Boothill visibly relaxes a bit. He still eyes it just a little warily for a second, but he accepts and plugs it into the port on his side.
Himeko pulls up the list of all recent errors, and they really are all the same. Boothill has had multiple temperature alarms over the past couple of weeks since the Charmony Festival, and they know it's not the environment, because Penacony is mostly dreamscape and kept mild year-round. The long-forgotten natural deserts are too far away.
Boothill is staring from the corner of his one good eye, so Himeko turns the hologram to let him see what she's doing easier. They don't appear to be false alarms. His internal temperature spikes and then slowly lowers again, high enough that if it lasted it would eventually cause damage.
One option is for her to start rooting through personal data, figuring out what he was doing at the time of each code, and tracing cause and correlation.
Instead, Himeko reads out the timestamps, and asks Boothill if he minds sharing what was happening around him when it occured.
Two weeks ago: He and Dan Heng went to explore Dreamflux Reef and found a bar- nice place, good atmosphere. Woman runnin’ it was a doll. Boothill left fer not even two minutes to get them drinks (Dan Heng knows like nothin’ about liquor, Madam Navigator, can you believe this guy) and when he came back, someone had already stolen his seat and was hittin’ on Dan Heng! Dan Heng didn't even care, just shooed ‘em off. Boothill laughed and said not to let him get in his way if he wanted to meet someone. Dan Heng looked at him like he'd grown a second head. Why would he want to leave with someone else, when he came here to be with Boothill?
Twelve days ago: While laying low- er, just rustlin’ up some grub- in the Moment of Blue, Boothill passed Dan Heng with March and Caelus playin’ on the beach, buildin’ sandcastles and the like. When he passed by again almost two hours later, they were still out there, with Dan Heng pullin’ March through the water on her inner tube and Caelus hangin’ off the back of it. He swam so fast! You'd think he was part water snake or somethin’. He looked happier ‘n a cat in a sunbeam… He has a nice smile, doesn't he?
Eleven days ago: Boothill was killin’ time in Dreamflux Reef when he turned the corner down a shady alley and saw Dan Heng, surrounded by three men demandin’ “protection money.” None of ‘em stood a chance, they were all on the ground before Boothill even blinked! So cool! Boothill wants to see that spear of his closeup- Anyway, Dan Heng stepped on one of ‘em on his way out, hahaha! Boothill stepped on the same guy a second time as he hurried to catch up.
Eight days ago: Here on the Express, actually. Boothill had mentioned bein’ curious about the archives, and Dan Heng personally invited him.
(“I remember that day, I saw you in the hall.” “Was there any problem with the heating that day?” “No, none. I don't think the temperature has anything to do with these error codes. I have a different theory, keep going.” “If ya say so.”)
Boothill was fascinated by an entry on aeons, and from a single question he asked about Lan, the two of ‘em ended up talkin’ fer hours. About aeons and Paths and Emanators, Acheron and Self-Annihilators, the Sea of Nihility, Tiernan, the Nameless and the Galaxy Rangers, their burial relics and their customs. Dan Heng finally just started writin’ and editin’ the entries in real time, with Boothill pointin’ things out and tellin’ him what to add in. They were at it so late that Boothill ended up sleepin' on a couch in one of the cars.
He'd figured there had to be something to make Dan Heng chatty- he'd caught just a glimpse of it that first night they met, sittin’ at the bar in the Reverie together. He'll have to ask about the archives more often, if it gets him all revved up like that.
One week ago: After that night of energetic discussion, Dan Heng was apparently hyped up, because after he'd downed some of Himeko's coffee (“You had some too, right? What did you think of it?” “It was great, even better'n chewin’ bullets!” "Thank you! That was my newest brew, I can't wait for everyone else to try it.") he actually asked Boothill to go hunting with him. Boothill asked who their target was, and was surprised when Dan Heng pulled out photos that looked like they were from March's camera, of all things, instead of a bounty or wanted poster.
And as he sat there, studying these pictures, Dan Heng explained that he wanted to hunt down these specific memory zone memes to record them into the archives. Planets with so much memoria are a rarity, especially with the Stellaron's activity thrown into the mix, which has surely affected the local “wildlife.” He might not get another opportunity like this for a long time. And Boothill had talked last night about his extensive expertise in tracking and hunting, so he should have plenty to offer here, Dan Heng would like to learn from his experience and see how he does things!
And oh, Madam Navigator, by the time Dan Heng was done speakin', his eyes were practically sparklin'! Just lit up like the sun! Boothill could scarcely believe it! The two of them couldn't even wait another day, they set out that very morning. It had been a long, long while since Boothill had tracked someone- er, somethin’- without the intent to capture or kill. It was…actually really nice. Nostalgic, but in a good way. It might even have been his favorite day on Penacony…so…far…
Boothill trails off as a couple of realizations crash into him. All the temperature alarms he's spoken about thus far- they've all happened in the company of Dan Heng. And now that he's thinking about it, he's pretty sure even the ones he hasn't yet talked about were with him, too. Dan Heng has been responsible for all of his error codes, every. single. one.
The screen in front of Himeko suddenly refreshes to the top of the list, displaying a new notification for the current time. Alert! Core temperature above normal range.
Himeko's knowing smile is sly as a snake.
Wwwwwelp, would ya look at the time, Boothill has some errands to meet, people to run, y’know how it is, he should really get goin'-
“Oh, Mr. Boothill? About that favor.” And Boothill jolts to a stop in the doorway because fudge, he can't just leave without hearing her out. He'd given his word. He has no problem running out on someone he thinks deserves it, but Himeko really had been kind to him to try and help him out. Her voice is just as knowing as her smile, Boothill can't turn around to look at her, or else he knows he won't be able to disguise the sound of his cooling fans kicking on.
“Don't make Dan Heng wait too long, ok~?”
“Y-Yes, ma'am.”
#honkai star rail#henghill#bootheng#Himeko KNOWS abort mission abort!!!#I really love Himeko sorta looking after Boothill the same way she does her crew even if he's not one of them haha. She's so sweet with-#-Dan Heng. She really seems to adore him and wants him to be safe and happy. I think she would be so happy he's found a new friend!#She wants to help this happen!! So get to it Boothill!!!#Was yapping about this fic to Ray and she nearly fucking oneshotted me: 'It's especially funny because we've got a Vidyadhara and a cyborg-#'-they literally have all the time in the world. SHE's the one who wants to be around to see it happen akfbbsbd''#AND JUST. GOD. Himeko knowing that she won't outlive Dan Heng. She's only human. She can't compare to a Vidyadhara lifespan. So she wants-#-to make sure Dan Heng has as many people as possible. She wants to know he'll be taken care of and not be lonely even after she's gone.#Himeko wants to see this important moment in his life happen she wants to be around for it *sobbing*#I'd been wanting to write this for a long time though because for me henghill is all about the little moments. like. they talked so much-#-back and forth in 2.2. they spent so much time together. they get along shockingly well. Dan Heng could have gone almost anywhere to wait-#-for the trailblazer to wake up after defeating Sunday. And instead of anywhere else Dan Heng returned right to Boothill's side. Was still-#-hanging out with him at the Reverie's bar. Still just chattering away. The point is that these two have a strong friendship to build a-#-romance on! They enjoy each other's company! They like spending time together! And I love that! I want to see their mundane nights!!#They'd have such fun dates uweh... They go on a coffee date and miss Himeko's coffee haha#(fun story Boothill's dialogue about Himeko's coffee was originally going to be 'it was uh...an experience. ain't nothin' else like it in-#-the world.' 'thank you!' But then I read Boothill's parlor car dialogue and? it turns out he LOVES Himeko's coffee? go figure ajfldjas)#(afaik he and Dan Heng are literally the only ones. how cute is that haha)#hsr#boothill#himeko#dan heng#hsr boothill#hsr himeko#hsr dan heng#my fics
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ANYWHO goodnight tumblr i'll be back on the art grind tomorrow i think 🙏
#haunted ecosystem#i'll take a burst of creativity in a different form than usual than the burnout slump i've been in for a few months#<- part of why my fandom stuff has taken a smidge of a backseat#dont get me wrong i am still very excited about my fandoms im just having fun off in oc hell (affectionate)#its nice to just be able to create and not really worry about perception. and also i feel Less bad about just throwing ocs into the wringer#((blame the fact i've been REALLY interested in whump recently and i have been. fixated. on one of my characters.))#and ALSO i've been! rekindling my flame for wtds. i've been putting off thinking about it since that fic got.#nothing bad happened? but it was still very devastating that somebody who i considered a friend from that fic just. evaporated.#but i'm gonna finish that fic for him :) even if it takes a year. even if it's the one thing i finish ever. it'll be wtds.#for where its gotten me and the fact its what got me out of my shell and is the reason i trust that my writing is good!#i used to really hate rereading my work. i catch flaws that are obvious to me. but that fic. i just think about how *good* the story is#that story means. a lot to me? as a person? like the main character is not a good person. but people care about him anyway.#and there are so many little things. so many sentiments. so much that is a love letter to people who've done bad but learnt to do better#because. god knows i wasnt a good person even just a few years ago. and maybe i see myself in him a bit.#he came from a place of paranoia and fear and pain. and maybe its a good thing that i've found it difficult to write him recently.#because god. i've been HAPPY. even with the rough moments and bad days. i've been happy. i mean fuck.#my birthday's what. ten days away? god damn man. i'm going to be 18. that's an achievement.#i want to look the kid who thought it was over at half my age and tell him we fucking made it. and there are more years to come.#there's a life ahead. even if it's going to be a bitch. even if it's going to be tough. there's love in your heart and people who care and#you're going to fucking live and you're going to feel better one day. you have people to meet properly and thank and cherish.#because for every day it feel like the world's ending there are a dozen more where the sun shines just the right way through the rain#and you can't help but smile because it's just so god damn beautiful.#and fuck it. you're sick. your hands hurt and your legs don't work right. and it's tough sometimes. but you have people who understand.#you have people who honest to god love you for who you are and appreciate your company. and 18 is the first step.#you've spent half your life unlearning things and you've spent half your life relearning how to be what YOU want to be#and if you're a mediocre artist and passionate writer then you'll be fucking great at that. taking the time to learn when it strikes you.#and maybe this is for me. but its also for anybody reading it too. please god if there's one thing you take from this let it be that#somebody out there cares. *I* care. god i care. even if we've never spoken proper i care about you.#i practically have a list of everybody i see in my inbox. i love seeing familiar names show up. i.#i dont know how to neatly wrap up this tag ramble. but. i am so damn full of love it hurts sometimes. its scary to be happy but thats ok!
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every time a hlvrai character gets woobified and turned into something even vaguely human a angel dies
#no benry would NOT fucking turn human oh my god#and bubby designs have a very large lack of “yeah this guy was built in a tube meant to be the perfect human”#and. i cant say much about tommy. tommy designs are surprisingly good other than the fact that people make him look like a child.#that man is 37#AND DARE I SAY. gordon designs are kinda fucking boring sometimes ok#like yes alright hes human but hear me out ok? hed be more fucked up gmod charactr looking than benry. have you seen what he looks like from#an outsider perspective. its so fucking funny but also gives me so many ideas for character desigbs#he is a vr headset and a set of controllers. tell me why i dont see more cool stuff with him#this is not at all dissing anyone specifically. i am just TIRED and having a moment because i looked at how awful my old hlvrai art was#if im being honest its dissing me more than anyone#sorry for being a hater on main. it will happen agaib#im so fucking tired of seeing trans [character] tags on fics and then seeing the most blatant transphobic woobification on earth. kills me#he would not fucking say that#these characters killed people ok.#not maintagging this
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i refuse to let clamp off the hook for underutilising himawari's fucking fascinating character setup and traits but on a less serious level im obsessed with the concept of her as an instigator of chaos.
like she's way less airheaded than she seems and it doesn't come off like Default Airhead Girl Behaviour or even Default Girl Companion That Ships Her Friends primarily (like not as hard as some other series by comparison I mean she's very I KNOW WHAT YOU ARE by default) specifically she just seems like someone that thoroughly enjoys being a little shit in a sincere way and giggling at her dumbass friends and has a shade of high emotional intelligence about it all. like she's just girl of all time. she's i don't know where im going with this just take this low effort meme from when i watched the holic stage play on youtube this isn't a coherent thought it's like 2am ill come up with better thoughts later
#ive seen kaguya sama and i know chika is a little bit rotted as a human being but we need to think about himas agent of chaos potential#this is all my personal intepretation but in general i find her a very cool character and working with the barebones framework is still fun#shes got so many interesting character traits#like how shes totally hooked on horror and spooky stuff more than the guys#but it has a distinct contrast with her deep fucking trauma and daily struggles with her curse-but-not-cause#theres smth that feels part coping mechanism part catharsis and part just straight up gap moe abt that#like....girl of all time#also her being depicted a lot either in rly bright sunny tones OR gothic lolita and no inbetween#i mean the joy of holic is everyone is basically posable dolls dressed up in whatever outfits you want but like its still a theme#and like we are given tidbits and small bits and pieces of her personality and interests and its not enough but its rly cool to think abt#they underused her frfr but what we do learn in how she reacts to stuff and bounces off other characters is so AAA#its wild how shes kinda a main character but kinda not in such a deeply fleshed out character driven story#i know shes a key player w loads of strong emotional moments but shes overshadowed a lot and it makes me wanna write mad headcanons#i find myself wondering how she copes day to day with her situation and how itd impact her personality around other people and self image#IDK you could write entire books abt her#but mostly: shes sillay#shes a little bit of a blank slate fill in the gaps but my brain is more than happy to supplement vibes and guesses#hima does not read as het to me because queer friendship groups work on stand user logic#i have a few fic ideas where it deep dives on her life as an adult and her push and pull w social interaction#but its early days on that so any details would b not very interesting past the conceot stage lol#i rly gotta get my ass to writing more fic but brain is a fuck writing longform is haaard unless its like idk visual novel formatting#anyway this is just nothing im not aiming for interaction here i just have half baked thoughts abt himawari the girl of all time#also hima kinda goes through hell and back so doing her dumbass 3 person comedy routine w her dumbass frisnds must be of big fuckin solace#its like that post about just being a girl who wants to have fun . she wants to have fun w friends#AND THAT IS OK justice for hima idk i love her even if she got the short end of the stick for deeply long term focused character writing
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.
#oh my god what the fuck was that. what the actual fresh fuck. was that movie#literally who was that for#I’m fucking!!! distraught?!?#I don’t even know where to begin#why did they continue the story like this?? we all know the history here we know how uhtreds story ends. we didn’t need to be smothered with#a watered down half baked unsatisfying angst fest#the story was so insanely rushed. the new characters so incredibly underdeveloped. and old faves barely got a word in#there wasn’t enough history in there for the history buffs and there wasn’t enough story in there for the fans. and fuck me there was ZERO#fan service. fan violence only#so many out of character moments!#if they were going to continue the story after ending the show so beautifully#they should not have done it like this#there were 3 moments I loved and they were each a split second long#and I have so much fanfic to write to make up for that#good fucking fuck I’m about to call out of work so I can write some emergency fixit fic.#man I did not expect it to be so disappointing.#I’m not gonna tag it because my sentiments are negative as hell but let’s just say tlk ended for me with the series finale#this movie is bullshit. except the fics that rise from its ashes.#they did us sooooo dirty after doing us so so so SO good#oh man what the fuck.#sigh.#at least my boys looked absolutely gorgeous#SIGH!
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It is in the way she moves that never fails to strike him. The fluidity and grace of a being who may as well be an angel sent down from the loftiest of havens to showcase what real beauty truly looks like. The white fur that is so pure it makes her look like she is perpetually shining in sunlight. The exquisite deep blue eyes that sparkle like precious gems. The hints of pink that adorn her nose and soft lips so elegantly. The way she smiles so sweetly that it could soothe any and all pain in an instant. To him, there is no chance she is anything but the most special heaven-sent gift.
It often felt like his soul had constantly searched to find her in all of his past lives, drawn to the warm light of her aura that shone like the brightest of beacons. He never knew if he had ever been successful, cats very rarely retained any tangible memory of what had preceded, so he always considered that this life must be the most rewarding of all. It had to be. That gift from the Everlasting Cat themselves was somehow his, and he never knew how to properly thank whatever force led him to her. If he could, he would beg for them to let him live the rest of his lives by her side, even if it means that this could be his last one.
Both cats are taking in a beautiful night outside of their shared den. It is situated just off of the main communal clearing in the junkyard, a quaint alcove surrounded by broken down appliances. It was gift of sorts bestowed to Plato once he finished his training, previously left vacant when another Jellicle was chosen to go to the Heaviside Layer.
It did not start out as much, with a few old and dilapidated cushions strewn out for him to sleep, but now it was smartly furnished with a large catbed and other little touches courtesy of Victoria, unbeknownst to her owners. She had made his spot a home rather than another place to rest his head, and on particularly hard or tiring days when his queen was not around, he would collapse into the bed and rub his head in to catch a trace of her scent to calm himself. As a way to thank her, he had worked diligently to clean up the outside area of the den, moving away bits of trash and weeds so that she had a semi-private space to practice her ballet routines in peace. Even a discarded bed rail was made to be a makeshift barre. It was selfless but purposeful, with the figurative renovations affording Plato his own spot to watch her as a devoted audience.
In a quiet moment like this, silently watching Victoria as she danced in the moonlight, Plato is again reminded of how lucky he is. From a rough life of fear having to survive on his own after being abandoned as a young tom, to now being in the midst of gentle tranquility amongst the welcoming community of the junkyard as a respected protector, it was a change that he rarely felt worthy of. Particularly when he saw the white queen at his side. When he had first laid eyes on her, it did not feel real, almost as if he had been reborn right then and there into a better life.
Time seemed to stop when he gazed at her, and he was always thankful for that. Thankful to be able to fill as many fleeting moments as possible with a sense of happiness that he wished for everyone to know. Thankful for how she unintentionally gave him a reason to be appreciative of every single day of his life since they first met.
Perhaps most self-serving though, he was also thankful for just how hot his queen is. The lithe shape of her body, strong but incredibly delicate, has always entranced him in a way he has yet to properly comprehend. Her round ass is something that he could never tire of either. Neither is her tight pussy that he has dreamt of everyday after first fucking her. The way she shows herself off with such a muted beauty when she chose to dance has always made the tom particularly hungry for her, and this evening was no exception. Seeing her flaunt herself in quiet confidence and surety always makes his lust burn wildly. She is in command of the world around her, the center of worthy attention, and he finds that side of her absolutely enthralling.
Not merely satisfied with sitting back and observing Victoria any longer, Plato sneaks up behind her.
"You know, I think you may have under rotated on that last spin Vic," he teases as his paws drape themselves along her shoulders. Standing closely, the tom towers over the white queen, enveloping her as she stands facing toward the side of an oven that acts as a mirror-like backdrop for her barre.
"Oh, is that so? I'd like to see my big lumbering tom do better. What do you think Plato? Do you want to show me how it's done?" she teases back. Victoria brings a paw to meet the one on her left shoulder, gently sliding her smaller fingers to interlock with Plato's as she peers up at him.
The tom brings his arms around her, hugging her smaller frame while humming lowly, "Nah. I don't want to show you up. Besides, I have to keep my body rested for patrol tomorrow." He tightens his hold, pleased with how soft and warm she always is on his fur. They stay cuddled together for a few lengthy seconds, appreciating the other's company. As she quietly sighs, content with being held, Plato lays a couple of kisses against Victoria’s neck. A shiver runs through her body, a reaction at his little advances, and it encourages him onward.
"Actually, you know what? Maybe I could expend a little energy right now. Have I ever told you how beautiful you are when you dance?"
"All the time, but you know I love hearing it. It gives me confidence knowing you are out there cheering me on." The queen smiles to herself, knowingly awaiting more from her tom.
"Not just beautiful Vic," he trails before closing the gap between them, pressing himself against her back, "Really hot too."
The queen lets out a quiet whine as he squeezes her harder, pushing her forward against the wall, effectively pinning her in. Her breathing sharpens and her heart starts to race as she finds herself all the sudden at his mercy.
"Plato, stop it. Someone is going to see or hear us!"
"Then you are just going to have to be quiet. Hmm?"
An arm sweeps across her chest, paw playing with her nipple. Within moments, another is grabbing hard at her ass. Victoria lets out a hushed moan, a confirmation of sorts, as she lets her tom take control.
"Beg for me," he softly growls into her ear. The way he says it is meant to be more playful, but he cannot hide the want coursing through his body. Not waiting for a response, Plato increases his efforts. One paw remains across her chest, now bracing her body against his own as the other paw rubs at her ass and thighs. When his paw starts pushing itself between the inside of her thighs from behind, brushing at the soft fur, Victoria cannot help but whine needlingly in anticipation as she quickly becomes desperate for her lover to pleasure her. The tom is careful with his moves though, slowly moving inward and forward in an almost teasing manner as he steadily moves higher up her legs. With him rubbing close to her center but not meeting it, Victoria heartedly pushes her legs together in an attempt to get some friction to ease the need in her.
“Please Plato, please. I promise I’ll be quiet,” she whispers, unable to focus. He is rarely so forward, and it is turning her on to be the object of his intense desire.
Plato does not have it in him to be cruel to her for long though, and the white queen is rewarded in moments. The tom runs his paw between her thighs again, rubbing against her pussy in heavier passes as she starts to squirm. It is so soft and squishy against his rougher paws, and he immensely enjoys the feeling. He keeps a divine pressure as he continues, delighting in the moans of his white queen.
“Oh god, that’s it. More, more!” Victoria cries, clearly more pent up for all of this than Plato would have thought. It only encourages him more to hear her whimper for him.
Sliding a finger between the lips of her pussy, Plato holds his smaller queen upright as she frantically tries to bend over to allow him better access to fingering her. He denies her for now, even though his mind is screaming for him to just give her whatever she asks for. Yeilding some willpower and relenting a bit, he starts to slip a finger into her wet pussy as she happily whines in relief, but the tom only goes about halfway. Pumping it in and out in small movements, he can feel her tense up as the pleasure builds. Plato pushes a second finger into her warm heat, again only going halfway. His white queen’s pussy is so tight, he cannot go any further in this position, but he is content with feeling her clench around him. The sharper breaths from Victoria are a symphony to his ears, and he quickens his pacing.
“Oh, fuck, please give it to me! Goddamn, I just need it so badly!” she yelps between moans.
“You know, I sort of like when you plead like this. Maybe I should slow down?” he muses as he smiles into her headfur.
“If you slow down Plato, I swear to Bast the only paws that will be touching you for the next month will be your own!” she bites back quickly. “Now, play nice. I know not so deep down you’re holding back.”
With a small laugh under his breath, Plato continues at the same speed, but not for long. Loosening his hold, he brings his arm down from her chest and pries her legs open with a forceful pull on the inside of her thigh as the other arm comes around from behind to rub at her heat again. Sinking his two fingers deep into her pussy now, the tom fills her up. He waits a moment for her to adjust to the stretch before jerking his wrist into a rhythm that makes her squeal in pleasure.
“Fuck, yes. You’re always so good to me when you listen, but please, more!” she cries.
Victoria cannot help but try again to move her hips for better contact, the pleasure becoming more than what she was wishing for, but she is stopped again by her larger tom pinning her in place. As her moans get louder and louder, Plato covers her mouth with his paw, her wetness still coating his fingers.
“Shh now, Vic!”
The tom pulls her head back so she is looking up at him, fucking her still with his other paw. There is an agony in the way her blue eyes beg for more as their gazes meet, and she wordlessly pleads for him to finish her off. He curls his fingers into her pussy, going faster as her back arches into his.
“I got you Vic, I promise,” he says softly before kissing her forehead. “Just hold on now.”
Plato pulls his fingers out and spreads her lips apart, roughly rubbing at her clit with his thumb. The white queen shakes against his body at the new waves of pleasure, but the tom stays with her, following her quivering as he relentlessly stays rubbing and rubbing at her most sensitive spot. Plunging his fingers in again, he fucks her hard, pressing his palm against her pussy and clit. Within a few seconds Victoria is falling apart, her whole body trembling in Plato’s arms. Muffled by her tom’s paw, she screams as much as she can before biting down on his finger to quiet herself. Weakly, she slumps against his body as he languidly stays fingering her down from her orgasm. The white queen’s legs twitch with each push of his fingers, and eventually Plato eases off when his love’s breathing starts to return to normal.
“Oh my goodness, that was fabulous, but uh…,” Victoria trails off between gasps, “Maybe this isn’t really a good spot Plato, don’t you think? I feel so exposed. What if Munk saw us? He would have a conniption knowing we were like this out in the open!” She turns to face Plato, giving him a gentle pat on his shoulder as an informal thank you.
“Oh, whatever,” he waves off. “He’s not innocent, trust me. Would you believe me if I said I once found him crouched down eating out Demeter when he was supposed to be on patrol?”
“Oh wow, really? Did you say anything?”
“Oh Bast, of course not! I would never be able to look him in the eyes if he knew I knew!”
“So, what did you do?”
“Uhhh…. well. Maybe I got something out of it too,” the tom confesses as he starts blushing.
With a playful swat at his chest, Vic giggles up at him as she waves her eyebrows.
“Oh c’mon! It was hot!” he digs in, not sure why he even said anything to begin with.
“I guess you guys see all kinds of stuff while out and about, wouldn’t you? Probably for the better that we make our little retreat then in case of wayward eyes,” she says coyly. “Assuming you aren’t done yet that is?”
With a wink, Plato grabs the smaller queen around her waist with both paws, and tosses her up over his shoulder as she squeals in excitement. “Nah, just getting started,” he jokes as he slaps her ass lightly before bracing her down with an arm. “Now, where were we?”
Victoria kicks her legs gleefully, powerless in such a position. With another ass slap, the white queen giggles uncontrollably, delighted when Plato literally flexes his muscles and makes her feel so light. The tom carries her across the small clearing in front of their den before ducking down through the doorway and out of the public eye. Standing at the entryway, the tom brings his free paw up and grabs her ass hard to a squeak from his love. “Everlasting, do I love… this so much,” he says as he caresses her backside. No matter how many times he gets to see it and play with it, Victoria’s round ass never fails to make him smile. “Oooooh it is so fun to hold! So soft you know.” Plato cups one asscheek, and then the other, slapping them enough so that they jiggle beside his ear over and over again.
Victoria claws at his back as he gets more spirited with his near worship, finding herself yet again at his full mercy and appreciation. Her tom never fails to let her know exactly what he cherishes so much about her, and the praise makes her feel truly special. “Oh ya? I know you love it so, so much, but what about this?” She wiggles her hips, making her ass shake on its own. “Or maybe... this?” Victoria tries as hard as she can to grind her hips into his shoulder, but it ends up being more of an awkward flailing in his arms. “Well, maybe not that then,” she says defeatedly.
“Or, how about this?” Plato interjects. He pulls her thighs apart as best as he can and fingers her once again as she moans, pulling out to lick the taste of her from his fingertips before starting again.
“Oooh yeah. That is better, but what else do you have?”
“I guess we’ll both see together. Hold on now, let me put you down.”
Plato carries her forward to the edge of their shared bed, and places her down softly onto her back. The white queen settles into the bed, and sprawls herself out. Standing above her, Plato is in awe of just how beautiful she is, staring intently at her whole physique like she is the greatest of artworks. For all he has seen, she is. Everlasting do those strong legs always look so great. The tom crouches down slightly and grabs a hold of her ankles. “Vic, do you want know what else I love? These.” He starts massaging her gently, slowly from her feet, up her legs like it is an act of dutiful reverence to her. At a point, Plato pulls her closer to him, raising her legs up so that he can massage at her thighs while they rest against his pelvis. When his big paws wrap around them, Victoria cannot help but whimper a bit as she gets more aroused.
“You know, I have always wanted to try something.” Without elaborating, he spits in his paw and jerks his cock to get it wet and hard. Pressing her legs together, he grunts as he thrusts between her soft thighs, essentially fucking them.
“Fuck, your fur feels so good. This is actually amazing.” He goes faster, huffing with each push of his hips as his cock pokes out from between her thighs with each thrust.
The look of enjoyment on his face tells Victoria that he is being genuine, but she is admittedly caught off-guard by this. Having every inch of her lusted after so unabashedly is never taken for granted though, and she has something in mind for him too.
Interrupting him after only a minute or so, she coos, “My love?”. The tom stops in an instant, listening intently as he gazes into her eyes. “That looks fun and all, but would you mind if I tried something instead? Something we both can join in on?”
“Oh god, absolutely. Whatever you want.” Plato’s heart beats in his chest. Neither of them are terribly adventurous, with new things coming very infrequently, so his love offering more is like a gift from the divine.
She brings her fluffy tail to brush along Plato's thighs before wrapping and unwrapping her tail gently around his length as it gets starts getting hard, giggling at the tense faces he is making.
"I cannot tell if you are enjoying this of hating it Plato! What's with the looks?"
"Ugh, its feels good Vic do not get me wrong, but you know how much I hate being tickled! I am just trying to keep it together!"
"Oh yup, whoops. Didn't think of that."
With a little grin, she lets her tail drop down before sliding herself back on the bed, just until her back paws reach the edge. Victoria lifts her right leg up and runs a toe down from Plato's chest, along his abdomen and pelvis with a light touch until she reaches his cock. She brushes a toe along its flaccid length, which gets another aroused jolt. Popping up to meet her back paw, she gives another run along the length of his cock, before bringing her paws together to sandwich it, playfully flopping his dick around while it is still mostly soft.
"How's that? Hmm?"
"Oh Everlasting Vic. Do you know how long I've been hoping for this? I don’t have a thing for paws, but damn those pads are so fleshy and soft! Show me what you got, please!"
Rolling it between her feet and giving it a few small tugs, the white queen gets Plato's cock hard before properly starting up her efforts. The feeling of her paws pumping up and down like that is a bit unusual for him, but there is a pleasant roughness and looseness to it. She switches up her method, alternating rubbing each foot along the side of his shaft while the other holds it in place. When desperate moans escape her tom's mouth as the pleasure builds, Victoria brings a foot to the head of his cock, grasping at it with her pink paw pads. Jerking his hips into her touch, the way she moves her toes and the pressure from them is revelatory. Sliding her foot along the top in little circles, he is at her mercy.
"Oh god that feels so fuckin' good. Those paws aren't just for dancing, and damn you are surprisingly good at this." The tom is astonished at her technique, enjoying every little move she makes.
Victoria works to edge her partner, never quite bringing him to his release. The way he shifts and gasps under her control is too fun and cute for her to end so soon, so she backs off and slows down when she thinks he is close, giggling at his desperation. However, the excitement of all of this is getting to her, and with a free paw, Victoria dips down to her pussy and starts rubbing the outside in tight circles. Within moments, she is even more wet, and starts fucking herself with her fingers while keeping rhythm with her feet. Little moans and lidded eyes carry her through each rush of pleasure, and the pacing increases as she gets lost in the pleasure rippling through her body.
"Oh fuck, why don't you beg for me Plato? You know, I really need to feel you inside me soon," she cries, clearly needy for more. "That cock is mine and I just want it so bad."
Almost like a race between her legs and arms, something is going to reach an ending point in all of this. Victoria's words bounce through Plato's empty head, and his resolve wanes as he chases the bliss of his queen's soft paws, fucking into her feet while Victoria still jerks him. Another toe grab around the tip is what breaks the tom, and he shoots off in large bursts, cumming into the air, all over her paws and ankles, and onto her chest with a groan as she watches on.
"Oh wow, someone liked that a lot."
"Fucking hell. Is there any part of you that is not perfect Vic?" He looks at her with an adoration unmatched by anyone. "Seriously? Goddamn. You can ruin me with either set of paws like its nothing!"
"Oh well, you talk too sweetly my love. Why don't you show me what other parts of me are perfect?" she says, spreading her pussy open with her fingers as a way to tease him.
Even though he just came, Plato is hard again at the greatest temptation he knows.
Not needing an answer, Victoria stops what she is doing and grabs her legs, pulling them up underneath her knees. She gleefully kicks her feet, admiring the cum covering her paws and ankles. With impressive flexibility, she brings her left leg up and begins to lick the cum off, eyeing Plato the entire time as she cleans herself. Moments later, she does the same with her other leg, pausing for a second to show off her tight pink pussy and asshole.
"You know, I have a dance routine that I want to practice later," she muses, trailing off in sultry manner as she rubs her paws over her ankles while maintaining eye contact. Without delay, the white queen pulls her legs up by the ankles, raising them up by her ears as she bends herself in half, "Why don't you help me stretch beforehand?"
"I-I'd love to," the tom stutters, licking his lips without realizing it. The way her pussy is on such a breathtaking display in this position weakens him.
"Well then, what do you think about this to start?" Victoria spreads her legs widely apart into a horizontal splits, completely opening herself up to his hungry gaze. Even with her legs extended out fully, her pussy is so tight that it only opens up the slightest bit at the stretch.
The tom drops to his knees and cradles her hips under his arms, pulling her body towards him. He gently kisses and licks at the outside of her wet heat, trying his best to hold himself back from diving in face first. The taste from Victoria’s pussy, even just a hint of it, makes Plato’s mind go wild. He loves taking his time to enjoy being between her legs, and he takes full advantage of every second she gives him. Each light touch causes Victoria to shiver and gasp in burning anticipation, and when Plato pushes his tongue into her, she is already moaning and shaking at the glorious pleasure rippling through her. The tom follows her through every jerk of her hips as he slowly edges her forward, bathing in the sounds of his love. Unable to contain his enthusiasm much longer, he lingers on her clit until Victoria’s whole body is trembling.
“Oh my Bast, hggh Plato that feels so good,” she whines sweetly.
Grabbing Plato by his head, dually holding on for dear life and also shoving his face even more into her pink heat, Victoria claws frantically as the pleasure builds, wordlessly begging for him to continue on, to lick more, for him to just stay in that spot and set her free. Licking and licking in a steady rhythm of long strokes and short wiggles on her clit, quickly the white queen is left squealing breathlessly as her thighs press hard against Plato's ears and her pussy pulses around his lips and tongue.
“Fuuuucck!”
Her body slumps back, relaxing as the tom ends his efforts just as he starts them, by giving her now starkly more reddish-pink pussy a final delicate kiss to finish it off and getting a final hint of her on his lips to savour and dream about for hours to come.
“Vic, I know I always say this, but I love you,” he tapers off as he licks his lips, “And I love how you taste. So good!” He stands himself up, staring down at her once again. “I can never get enough of it, but uhh, since we’re trying new things today, would you mind if I…?” His look is now meekly wide-eyed, clearly embarrassed about what he is thinking. Plato’s paws start rubbing on the outside of her thighs pensively, getting lost in the soft fur.
“Just spit it out Plato. C’mon what are you so coy about?”
“Well…” The tom grabs her sides firmly, carefully rolling the queen onto her stomach. “I was thinking of something, but it is more for me than for you to be honest.”
With a giggle, Victoria peers back at him and gives him a wink. “Whatever you want Plato, no need to be shy.” She flicks her tail side to side, curiously excited.
A quiet thud tells her that her tom is on his knees once again. When strong paws push her legs open again and a familiar nose brushes against her thighs, the white queen is confused, but is now pretty sure she knows what Plato is too nervous to ask for. His rough tongue licking at her pussy again jolts her out of her thoughts, and she quietly moans in anticipation. Plato’s large paws knead both cheeks of her tight round ass, almost covering them fully. With happy squeezes, he pulls her ass apart, admiring the sight for a moment. The pause feels long, at least to Victoria, but a sudden and heavy lick against her asshole following some licks to her pussy catches her off-guard and causes her to yelp out loudly.
“Plato! What are you doing back there?”
She does not get an answer beyond a muffled growl as Plato, still nervous, silently pleads for her approval. Without any further complaints for his lover, he plants a kiss on each of her asscheeks before kissing her asshole gingerly, much like he does when he eats her out. Another testing lick gets a squeak out of Victoria, and Plato starts to settle into his rhythm as both of their bodies relax into it. Worshipping her with his moves, the tom caresses her backside as he rubs his face into her ass and pussy, clearly enjoying every moment. The wet and warm sensations against such a sensitive spot is admittedly a bit uncomfortable for the white queen, but she cannot bring herself to stop her man from giving her asshole special attention. Even without seeing his face, she can easily sense the desire and enthusiasm he has for finally rimming her like this.
“Oof. You are really enjoying this, aren’t you?” she groans after a particularly harder lick.
“You have no idea Vic,” he says slowly. “I truly cannot explain it in a way you’d understand. I just love your pussy and butt so much I feel like I need to, I don’t know, pray to them right now or something.” The tom continues on, running the tip of his tongue against her asshole again.
The long strokes between her pussy and ass are a mixed dose of pleasure for the queen, but her tom wants to give her something to enjoy after being so welcoming to his exploits up to this point. Pushing two fingers into her wet heat, he fingers her again while licking at her tight asshole. Victoria claws into their bed, the paired sensations creeping up suddenly and strongly as they crash through her much harder than she was anticipating. One its own, his rimming was simply tolerable, but with his fingering, it is a totally different sense of pleasure that she has never felt before.
“Plato, please. I seriously need you to stop. You’re going to make me cum again!”
The tom stops immediately, and cannot help but grin. “I thought you weren’t going to like it Vic. Everlasting, that was pretty damn fun. You do taste good – all of you,” he says will a playful spank of her ass.
“Well, you know what, I kind of feel like I need to revere a part of you too,” she teases as she turns herself around on the bed, now facing toward him as he remains on his knees. Victoria runs a paw across his neck to the back of his head, pulling him into a number of kisses peppered all over his face. She pats a spot on the bed, “Sit down, please, for me?”
Without delay, Plato happily jumps onto the bed beside her, excited as always for her taking control. Victoria slinks her body in front of him, sliding herself between his strong legs. Her eyes are intensely trained on his, and the world around him seems to fade away, with only his love in view. For all he cares, he would live the rest of his life like this, dedicated only to her existence. His focus is broken slightly when the white queen smiles so kindly back at him, and he becomes aware of how much his heart is racing at what she has in store for him.
“You know, you look so big and powerful sitting like that. At least compared to me.” Victoria runs her paw softly against his thigh without breaking her eye contact, “So strong too.” The queen unsheathes her claws, digging them into his fur and lightly onto the skin of his thigh as she drags them slowly up his leg. “I know you would do anything to protect the people you love.”
“Well, I’m no hero Vic. Just doing what I can. You know -”
“I think its hot Plato,” she cuts in, clearly going somewhere with her thought.
The white queen creeps even more forward, her head now resting on his lap. She continues staring right through him, and it makes his fur stand on edge. “How you could easily fight off anyone or throw them around,” she emphasizes the last part with a gasp, and Plato can now feel her breath against his cock. He struggles to stay composed, loving every moment she teases him. She rubs both of her paws into the flesh of his thighs, grabbing them, “How you can flex these muscles like its nothing.” She moans a bit, possibly giving away how much her praise is not just from general appreciation, but from her own lust as well.
“Do you know what my favourite part is though?”
Plato cannot manage much aside from a choked, “W-what?”
“That your all mine,” Victoria whispers with a sultry rasp to her voice. She grabs his cock firmly in her paw to steady it, breaking her eye contact for a moment as she starts nuzzling the soft fur of her face against his length. “All mine.”
Winking up at her tom, the white queen opens her mouth and swallows him down with a quick move. Plato jerks his hips into her face, clawing himself into the bed in reaction. No matter how many times, the divine feel of her warm mouth and throat still takes him by surprise, and he cannot help but moan at how good it feels as he throws his head back in pleasure.
“Oh good god Vic, how do I deserve you?”
He looks down at his love, and she is still peering up at him with her intense stare. She pushes and pulls her head back, sucking his cock with a tenderness and love that is unmatched, all the while staying locked in on his eyes. It seems like she is worshipping him right now with her moves, something Plato is not used to. The tom is used to being the one smitten, endlessly trying to make her feel like she is the most important being on the face of the Earth. The intimacy of the blowjob, with them so focused on the other, feels like a spiritual experience more than it feels like sex. When Victoria gives him another small wink, Plato gulps hard in anticipation. The queen licks all over his cock before holding the head of it in her mouth with pursed lips, her whiskers bending along with her efforts.
“Holy fuck are you beautiful, Vic. I can’t put it into words.”
The white queen runs her rough tongue along the bottom of his cock, rubbing against the sensitive spot below it's tip. Plato instinctively grabs a hold of her head with one paw as the pleasure crashes through his body with jolts, with his love still staring intently up at him. “Shit that feels good!”
Humming in satisfaction at her efforts, Victoria presses firmer with her tongue, but is quickly stopped by her tom. “Vic, please. I cannot believe I am saying this, but stop. You’re going to make me cum again, and I don’t know if I have it in me for more after that.” Smiling as much as she can with her mouth full, she purrs against his girth, the vibrations a whole new sensation that Plato wishes her could explore more, but as asked, she pulls her head back, giving his cock a messy kiss as it leaves her lips. She climbs up on her knees, pressing her body against his chest.
“I guess we should really get to some of that stretching you offered to help me out with a little while ago, hmm?” Victoria smiles so big her fangs glint in the fading light of their den. “What do you think?”
“I don’t think I could stand waiting any longer to be honest,” Plato says, running a paw through the soft fur behind her left ear.
“Well then,” she giggles as she drops down from atop his lap and spreads herself onto the bed, laying on her side as she supports her head with one arm. “How do you want me first?” she asks, beckoning with her free paw for him to come closer.
“Lay down on your belly again. I’m not done with that nice ass of yours quite yet. I have one more thing to try, I promise.”
“Alright then, but keep that tongue to yourself this time, okay? If you lick my ass again, it is going to sparkle when I walk around!” The queen laughs off the last sentence as she settles face down into the bed, tail swishing in the air above her.
“Yeah yeah, but what a sight that would be though.”
Plato crawls up behind Victoria before raising himself onto his knees. His paws are swift to massage at his love’s backside again, still delighting in just how soft it is and how it jiggles around in such a mesmerizing way when he plays with it. The tom bends down and gives each cheek a light kiss once again before grabbing them firmly in his paws. Letting go with his right paw, he begins jerking his cock, quickly getting hard at the sight and feel of his white queen’s perfect behind. He returns his paw to the same half of her ass as before, and gently pulls her cheeks apart with both paws. The tom lines his hips up, and with as much care as he can, he thrusts his cock between her asscheeks, effectively sandwiching his length inside of them.
Plato fucks back and forth, huffing at the sensation. “Well damn Vic, what a surprise this is just a good as your thighs, but I think it may be even...,” he trails off before smacking her ass as she squeaks, “Hmm, oh yeah, even better!”
He quickens his thrusting, getting carried away at how much he is enjoying the soft cushion of her ass around his girth. “Fuck, I love it. I love it so much.” The tom growls as he picks her hips up and fucks her cheeks more and more, all while Victoria is near helpless as she goes along with it.
“Plato, enough with the personal fun! Now just do it, fuck me like you mean it. Show me what my strong tom is capable of!”
“Oh Everlasting, with pleasure Vic. You don’t need to ask me again I swear. You better hold on to your collar!”
Plato pries the queen’s legs open into a wide splits again before rubbing at her pink pussy. Victoria pushes her hips back into his touch as she moans desperately, needy for him to finally fill her up after all of this foreplay.
It comes in a most divine way for both the tom and the queen. Plato fucks into her wet heat to a loud mewl of approval from his love, taking his length as she gasps in utter pleasure. Victoria whines with each stroke, clenching around him as he fucks hard into her, chasing the pleasure. It is always worth the wait for either of them, Plato getting to experience her tight pussy that always takes his cock perfectly, and Victoria getting stretched and filled just so in a way that she cannot properly fathom. The pleasure when they meet is unrivaled, and the intense passion makes them truly feel alive. The tom increases his pacing to fully enjoy it, grabbing hold of the flexible queen’s left leg and bending it forward over her back, lifting her hips up slightly as he deepens his penetration. The tom fucks her with almost everything he has in this position, throwing his whole weight into driving his cock into her tight pussy.
All Victoria can do is squeal in response, breathless already from how good it feels. “Oh Bast. Fuck. More Plato! More!”
“Fuck you feel amazing. Ugh goddamn. Hold on for a sec.”
Plato eases off of her leg, letting it fall to the bed. He brings an arm around the queen and pulls her onto all fours so he can take her doggystyle, fucking hard into her again and again. The sensation and pleasure building in him never fails to make the tom feel like he is the luckiest cat around.
“More, please! For the love of Bast, fuck me like you mean it!”
The tom, in his lust, wraps his large paws around her lithe waist and lifts her body up clear off of the bed, slamming himself into her in any means to give her what she is begging for. Her paws and legs dangle wildly beneath her as she is made a ragdoll in his grasp with each frantic thrust.
“Oh shit, that’s it. Harder!”
Plato fucks her with a power he rarely shows, pushing his hips into her while also pulling her body towards his as he fucks her relentlessly from behind. Each thrust is made with as much of his length he can muster, almost pulling out each time before he slams back into her tight pussy again. It is all becoming too much for the queen, and with a few more hard thrusts, her smaller body convulses in his hands, momentarily fucked out as a massive orgasm tears through her.
“Holy fuuucck Plato. Aaah, fuck!”
The tom pulls out of her clenching pussy, lowering her down back onto the bed with the utmost care and letting her limp body sink into the bed as she recovers with sharp breaths.
“Damn that was good Vic, but I really think we need to work more on some stretching. Please?”
“Oh no, look who’s begging for it now,” she teases, waving her backside in the air. “Listen, give me a few minutes. I’m still coming down from all that. I think I caught a glimpse of a former life for a sec back there.”
“Fine, fine. I just want you so bad. I can’t stand it. I need to hear you scream.”
“C’mon take it slow! We have lots of time. I promise.”
Victoria pats the bed alongside her once again, inviting her love to join her. He dutifully follows her lead, laying down beside his queen to face her. He instinctively wraps his arms around her in a warm embrace, keen to never let her go. They stay cuddled for some time, sharing warmth between them.
“Hmm, I guess this is nice enough. I’ll never get tired of holding you. So soft and cozy, its nice.” He kisses the top of her forehead, tightening his hold on her smaller body as he sighs.
“I know I’ve said this a hundred times, but you’re not too bad either. Like a big blanket draped over me that makes me feel so at peace.”
“Oh yeah?”
“Of course. And maybe that blanket likes my ass a bit more than anymore else, but that’s just the way it is y’know. I would gladly be in bed all the time with a nice, warm, big thing like that.”
Victoria claws a path down Plato’s chest and abdomen, firmly grabbing hold of his cock. The look in her eyes is fiery, and she cannot hide the grin on her face as she watches her tom wriggle as she takes control again. She leans in and whispers in his ear, “Do you think you can you help me with something?”
“Whatever you’d like, just say the word.” The tom is nodding as he begs, eyes wide for her request.
The white queen raises her left leg up, extending it all the way up by her head and touching her shin against her ear. In that position, she opens herself up, on full display for her tom. She playfully claws down her leg to ensure Plato gets the full picture, kicking it in little waves as she moves to her thigh. “Well, I think I need someone nice and tall to help me get the full stretch into my legs. You look like the perfect person.”
“Is that so?”
“Yes, yes absolutely. Why don’t you stand up and we can get started?”
“Well then, anything to help.”
The tom jumps up off of the bed, standing as tall as he can while he waits from his love to make her way up in front of him. Even though Victoria is relatively tall when compared to the other queens, she is easily dwarfed by Plato standing over her.
The queen runs her paws along the tom’s chest, “Oooh yes, this is a perfect spot,” she muses as she looks up to him with a sweet smile. Victoria lifts her right leg up parallel to the floor before raising it slightly, brushing it against the fur just above Plato’s hip.
“Do you what this move is called?”
“Uh, no? Fancy leggy? What do you take me for Vic? I can’t even walk with half as much grace as you do. You're honestly magnificent.”
“You’re so flattering. It’s called adagio. Doesn’t that sound so romantic?”
“Kinda, yeah. Very elaborate.”
“Well, this,” she pauses as she raises that leg and arm straight up high into the air much like she does during her solo, “This is a développé.”
“That’s fucking hot. Bast Vic, you know I love when you demonstrate your skills like this.”
“Oh yes, I know. That’s why I want you to help me stretch.” She lowers her heel to waist level, stopping it with her paw. “Hold this for me,” she says as she offers her leg to Plato.
He brings it up to his mouth, kissing her foot gingerly, “For my lady, anything.”
“Okay, well then grab hold of my heel and lift my leg as high as it’ll go. I promise I’ll make it worth it.”
Doing as he is told, Plato raises it up, stopping as Victoria’s toes reach the level of his ear. The white queen is in a vertical splits, leaning to rest her legs fully against her tom’s body all the way from his feet to his shoulder.
“Good Plato, good.” She pats lightly against the paw holding her raised leg in place. “Now, fuck me like this.”
“What? How? I don’t want to hurt you Vic!” His eyes are wide is astonishment, running it through his mind how he can do it.
The white queen reaches between her legs, fingering her pussy to get them coated in her sweet wetness. She brings her fingers up to Plato’s mouth, shoving them in. The taste and scent sends a chill through him, his cock getting hard. “You’ll be fine. Do it for me, please? Stretch me out.”
Without needing any more of an invitation, the tom adjusts his footing and fucks slowly into her pink pussy as she purrs in response. Somehow, they always fit together perfectly, and this is no different. She is at the exact height he needs, and after a few testing thrusts, Plato’s hips find a rhythm as he pushes his cock into her tight heat as deep as he can manage like this.
“Fuck, I think you’re even tighter like this. It’s crazy.”
The tom is right. In this position, each thrust is sending a jolt of divine pleasure as her tom drives himself into her with a bit more resulting stretch and pressure than she is used to. He keeps on fucking her slow and hard, listening intently to her loud gasps and moans as she is filled so wonderfully.
“Bast, your pussy feels like heaven.”
“Hmm, then you’ll probably enjoy this then.”
Victoria loops an arm around her leg, and turns her body slightly on pointe so that the inside of her thighs are against his hips. She flexes herself even more, overextending into a full side split as she opens her pussy up more for her tom to bury his cock into. “Let me have it!”
The tom brings his own arm around her raised leg to support the queen, ramming his full length deep into her as she cries out. While he will gladly take her in any position, there is something so enthralling about getting the chance to fuck her as the ballerina she is. Plato’s mind is heavy with lust, enjoying every fleeting moment he can with his queen gifting him this special access. He is forceful with his moves, no longer holding back as much as he gives himself to her needs.
“Oh god, oh god. Fuck Plato, you’re stretching me out so good. That cock belongs deep inside me, don’t you forget. Keep it coming, harder!”
The tom roughly slides himself into her pussy again and again until Victoria is shaking.
“Fucking hell Plato. It feels so good.”
She can barely hold herself up as she cums again with a scream, her pussy clenching hard against Plato’s cock.
“Fuuuck!”
The white queen’s body slumps backwards against Plato as he still fucks her slowly, guiding her down from another revelatory orgasm as he supports her body with his own.
“Vic, that was amazing. I have always dreamed about something like this ever since I saw your first solo. You were just so beautiful when you showed off like that. Like this. Hhhgh, I just cannot help myself.”
The tom grabs her around her hips, pulling her off of the ground as they stay connected. As if she weighs nothing at all, Plato brings an arm behind her back to support her as he repositions the queen’s body.
He pulls her up so that they are embraced chest to chest, their eyes meeting again. The queen wraps her arms around him, pulling herself up into a hug. “I love you so, so much Victoria.”
“I love you too Plato.” She smiles sweetly up at him, nuzzling her head against his neck and chest as he tucks his head into hers. Their mutual lust quells for a fleeting moment in the den around them, with only the sound of low breathing being shared between them.
Plato is the first to break the silence as he begins kissing Victoria with an intense passion before starting to fuck her slowly again. He is languid as he thrusts into her, the look of utter adoration in his eyes as he cradles her in his arms. The queen loops her arms around the back of his neck as she longingly moans into his mouth, returning the love he is showing as they connect in quiet intimacy.
Their mouths break away as both try to catch their breaths, quickly getting exhausted as they continue intertwined, but neither is remotely interested in stopping now.
“Vic?”
“What?”
“So, I know I promised that I was done with personal requests, but I just thought of one more. May I?”
She laughs softly, amused by his tenacity with always finding new things to check off a mental list with her. “Go ahead. How could I say no?”
Plato kisses her forehead, murmuring a smitten “Thanks.”
The tom slides his arms up under her arms, lifting her off of his cock to a meekly frustrated whine from his love, clearly satisfied with his efforts up to this point but still wanting more. Plato holds her out at arms length, admiring her smaller frame. “You are so cute Vic, by the way. An angel in my hands.”
Swinging his arms up above his head quickly to a surprised yelp, the tom places Victoria so that she is sitting on his shoulders riding his face. Bracing her against his lips, he spreads his large paws across her lower back before he rubs his face into her heat. Unlike before, he is not keen on going slowly, kissing and licking wildly at her folds and clit as she claws the top of his head for stability. Her legs and thighs are quivering against his back as she moans loudly.
“Fucking hell Plato, I feel like I’m gonna black out up here. Shit you are too good at this!”
The tom grunts against her heat, blinded by the white fur shoved into his eyes. The queen curls her body forward, resting her chest atop of his head. “Plato, I think I only have it in me for one more time. Maybe you should choose wisely how you want that to happen?”
The tom gets the hint, stopping his exploits. He gently lowers her in his arms down to eye level, still licking his lips in ecstasy at the taste of her. “Well, are you ready then?”
“Oh yes, my love. Show me what my big strong man still has left in him”
Plato grabs under her ass, raising her in front of him and lowering her onto his hard cock. The queen clenches in glee as she slides over him, the pleasure of how he fills her up never waning. The tom brings his arms beneath her knees, adjusting her body and his hips before he quickly pumps repeatedly into her pink pussy with all that he has. Victoria shrieks in his arms, flailing her arms until they find his shoulders for support.
“Oh yes, fuck me just like that Plato. Holy hell! I’m all yours!” she cries out.
Her words unlock something in the tom’s mind, and his thrusts become heavier and hungrier. Plato growls with each push of his hips, getting feral as he takes his queen apart. Victoria screams in pleasure as he fucks her as hard and fast as he can, burying his cock into her warm heat like his nine lives have always been dependent on this very moment.
“Fuck, fuck. Fuccck!”
The queen squeals loudly as she cums, but the tom does not slow down, slamming himself into her. He leans forward and kisses her in his arms, biting at her lips and neck as he continues to fuck her. Victoria cums again, eyes beginning to roll back as her tom overwhelms her in waves of immense pleasure. Plato stays incessant with it, chasing his own release as he fucks her raw. The queen can barely talk, merely squeaking as each thrust makes her see stars.
Stepping forward, Plato throws their bodies down onto their bed, still ensuring that his queens lands relatively softly onto her back. He straddles her body, throwing his hips down into her. He looms over the white queen as she shines in the moonlight draping their den, kissing her frantically in a fit of pure love and lust. Victoria claws desperately at his back, carving scratches and pulling out clumps of his fur as she thrashes beneath him in beautiful agony. Forcing her thighs apart, he deepens his penetration, fucking her as her legs wrap around his back.
“Plato my dear, cum for me,” she whispers barely audible in contrast with the tom’s heavy breathing, but it rings out crystalline in his head.
Fucking in to her pussy, swollen from overstimulation, the tom thrusts hard into her as she yelps. The white queen cums hard again, moaning as she shudders uncontrollably against his skin. Above her, the tom unloads into her warm heat with a lengthy groan, flooding her tight pussy with throbbing waves of his cum before collapsing down onto the queen. Cum leaks out from her red pussy as they stay locked together, both utterly spent.
Victoria’s body is twitchy, fur completely on edge after being fucked so passionately. Her mind is still trying to play catch up from all of the orgasms, but she manages to reach out from underneath and give an appreciative pat to the tom laying overtop of her. They are both powerless to move, still recovering.
Plato gently cups Victoria’s face in his paws as they kiss. “I love you Vic. My love is yours today, tomorrow,” he stops to take a deep breath in, raising his head to look down a her, “It is yours for as long as there is air in these lungs. I swear I will find you in the next life, and if there isn’t one, then I will thank the Everlasting Cat at the gates to the Heaviside Layer for every single moment with you. You are the light of my life.”
“That’s so sweet, my love. I love you so much too. You are my total feeling solace in this world, steadying me.” She contemplates the words before starting again, “But, I mean this in a nice way, get off of me. You are so damn heavy”
Plato pulls out of his queen as cum pours from her pussy. He rolls onto his side, bringing Victoria beside him. They silently share a gaze of complete adoration, smiling excitedly to one another just like they did after their first time together.
“Fucking hell. That was the best time I’ve ever fucked you Vic. That was it. My god.” The tom’s breathing is still heavy, all of his energy totally wiped out in such a feral burst of lust. “I’m going to be dead on my feet for patrol tomorrow. How the hell do I explain to Munk why I can’t move?”
“Just look him in the dead in the eye and tell him that you were fucking your girl silly. I’m sure he'll understand. He seems like he can excuse a little break in private from the sounds of it, if you know what I mean.” She raises her eyebrows again as she grins.
“Oh lord, shut up,” he laughs.
“Hey, wait a minute, I thought you said you loved me? Pardon me with the sudden attitude you big oaf!”
“Vic, I love you more than literally anything, but I am not sure if it can trump that look Munk gives us when we are lacking energy. Have you even seen him disappointed? Its way worse than when he’s mad.”
“Tell him you are just trying to treat me like he treats his wife, mouth and all.” She nods once to sell her words.
“Oh my God!”
“Is that what Demeter said while you were watching them? I bet she did!”
“Why do I tell you anything? Seriously?”
Plato grabs his queen and pulls her into a tight hug as he kisses her forehead gingerly. After all of this, it is probably a good time to actually use their shared bed to get some rest and sleep. This night has proven to be one of the most rewarding in Plato’s new chapter of life, and he will always be thankful to whomever blessed him with the brightest light that shines in his universe. Being beside his white beauty is ultimately far more rewarding than anything pleasurable in this life or the one preceding or potentially following it, and he would never want to change a thing about that.
#well first of all this is dedicated to every Victoria simp around#she is the best and deserves everything good all of the time#they love each other so much y'all just do not understand#Plato has been hoping to explore fucking her while she does parts of her ballet routine / solo and he went for it anons#plus he has been dying to hotdog her ass and fuck her thighs#the good lord Everlasting Cat was shining down on him (and on Vic's white fur)#that is not to say Victoria did not utterly enjoy every moment - she really really did and want Plato to do it again at some point#it took me way too long to get around to writing a legitimately dedicated whole fic about Platoria and that is a shame really#not to mention I have also been threatening this fic since freaking April of this year and just left it for so many months#but here it is in all of it's 9720 word glory#that is the longest one yet - fitting really given the last fic was end of last year#so had to do it up properly#i appreciate everyone who follows this blog and waits patiently for these fics to drop#thank you for your support#not sure if there will be another one this year but you never know
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“never is a promise” | 12.4k
old man!logan x f!reader
SUMMARY: You are everything Logan isn’t: sweet, trouble-free, much younger—and, to top it off, Charles' caregiver.
WARNINGS/TAGS: mdni smut 18+ mentions of drinking. angst. some fluff. old man!logan x caregiver!reader. implied age gap (reader’s in her twenties). miscommunication. slow burn. pining. reader is shorter than logan and has long hair. charles in his cupid era. petnames. minor injuries. wound tending. mentions of blood. virgin!reader. dirty talk. cum shots. fingering. handjobs. oral sex (m receiving). loving sex. sex with a lot of feelings (is that a tag?). unprotected p in v.
A/N: i just want to fall in love with him. that’s it. that’s the reason why i wrote this long ass fic 😭 while doing so, i had “never is a promise” by fiona apple and “cool about it” by boygenius on repeat. give them a try if you haven’t listened to them (your lives will be CHANGED) (also, thank you for reading <3)
No matter how often you play chess with Charles, you never manage to beat him.
“You’ve been staring at that knight for five minutes. It’s not going anywhere, I promise.”
Chuckling at his sarcasm, you fold your hands in your lap, lifting your eyebrows in mock surrender. “Okay, I get it. You’re the master of chess,” leaning back in the chair, you cross one leg over the other. “Can we play something else?”
“I’m quite entertained, thank you,” Charles says, sliding the board closer to you across the table. “Your turn.”
“How is it that you don’t get tired of this game?” you mutter under your breath, eyes fixed on the board as you weigh your options, hovering your hand indecisively over the chess pieces.
“Please do something before I’m forced to make a dash for the toilet.” He hangs his head, pinching the bridge of his nose—a telltale sign of one of his irritable days.
His words spur you into action, encouraging you to finally slide the knight into position. You glance up, meeting his gaze with a hint of challenge. “You go now.”
Charles doesn’t hesitate, and he moves a bishop. “Check.”
Fuck. You hadn’t seen that coming. “I’d prefer to walk away with my pride,” you joke, pushing your chair back and pretending to lose interest in the board.
That makes him smirk, a barely there grin dangling on the corners of his wrinkled lips. The truth is, you wouldn’t stop playing for anything in the world—not even if this old man kicks your ass every single time he suggests playing chess. “You’re not out of the game yet.”
Quietness settles over the tank while you allow yourself some time to come up with a new strategy. After a moment, you decide to go for a pawn, using it to block his bishop.
He doesn’t stop grinning, studying your move with an amused glint in his blue eyes. “Not bad, but you’ve left your king exposed.”
You gape at the board, your fragile confidence faltering for a split second. "I still have some pieces in play."
Charles nods, his brows drawing together in thoughtful consideration. "True. But sometimes, it’s not about how many pieces you have left—” He reaches out, carefully sliding his queen across the board. "It’s about where you place them.” He relaxes, hunching over, his eyes searching for yours. A smile that’s all teeth welcomes you. “Checkmate."
“Damn.” You blow out your cheeks, your gaze tracing the path of his queen. Somehow, he’s trapped your king with no easy way out.
He leans back with a satisfied grin. “That’s three games in a row. My suggestion is that you start rethinking your strategy.”
“Or maybe you’re just a better player,” you admit, a mix of frustration and admiration palpable in your tone. “No more chess for today, though.” You stand up from your seat, gathering the board and chess pieces. As usual, they find their place under Charles’ bed, and you turn back to him, beaming with delight. “I think you owe me one after all this.”
“You’re a terrible loser, my dear,” he says, his eyes twinkling as they take you in. “Reminds me of someone I know.”
At that exact moment, you hear the familiar creak of the tank’s door opening, followed by a cough you immediately recognize.
Without thinking, you straighten your back as Logan steps into the room. Charles notices it, but says nothing in return.
It was an infatuation—or at least, that’s what you try to convince yourself of. Logan is a very good-looking man, probably the most handsome you’ve ever laid eyes on.
The fact that you live with him doesn’t help at all. You think that if you only saw him occasionally, this—this anxiety that grips you whenever he’s around or when you hear his voice—wouldn’t happen in the first place.
Whether it’s good or bad luck, you’ve been sleeping under the same roof as him for over a year, and the crush you’ve had since the first time you exchanged words with him only seems to grow stronger with each passing day.
What you figure out over time is that men like Logan aren’t the dating type. He’s never brought anyone home, and for that, you’re secretly grateful. The last thing you need is to see him with another woman—thank you very much. Still, the thought gnaws at you: he could easily be meeting someone elsewhere.
In fact, it’s more than likely that he’s hooking up with other people. It doesn’t have to be at—
Alright. You don’t need this either.
Logan’s heavy footsteps resonate even louder, his presence more imposing, and he seems especially pissed off. Then again, he always has that demeanor—angry, grumpy, locked in a constant battle with life.
But today… today, you haven’t seen him this troubled in weeks.
“Look who’s joined us,” Charles mumbles, steering his motorized chair to meet him halfway. The chair bumps against Logan’s legs with a thud that sounds almost cartoonish, and Charles scrunches up his nose, his nostrils flaring in disgust. “You smell like shit.”
“Yeah, I missed you too, Pop,” Logan grunts, shoving his hand into the pocket of his suit, searching for something. That’s when you notice the bloodstains on his shirt, smeared across his chest, and the missing buttons at the top. Your breath catches in your throat, and you bite your tongue to keep from asking any foolish questions. “They gave me new ones,” he mutters, looking you in the eye as he tosses the pill bottle at you.
You leap forward to catch it mid-air, your heart skipping a beat. Logan holds your gaze for a moment longer, his expression unreadable, before giving a slight nod and turning on his heel to storm out of the tank.
When your attention goes back to Charles, you see how his eyes remain locked on the pills you’re holding, his head lowering in defeat. “He’s waiting for me to die.”
“Don’t say that.” You squat to be at his eye level, momentarily hiding the meds from his view. Still, you struggle to make him shift his gaze. “He’s taking care of you, which is something completely different.” You place your hand on top of his knee, giving it a reassuring squeeze. You’ve had this same conversation innumerable times, yet each time feels like the first. He offers you a melancholic but knowing look as you softly say: “You have to take them, Charles. I’m sorry.”
He raises a hand, his trembling fingers curling around your wrist, examining you, trying to find an answer in the lines. “Don’t be. At least you’re here.”
“I’m sure Logan’s tired; that’s why he doesn’t stay any longer. Haven’t you seen him?” You rise to your feet, moving behind him to guide his chair. The tank sort of has a chill in the air, metallic walls that seem to press in around you both. “Besides, you wouldn’t want to play chess with him. Rest assured I’ll always let you win,” you murmur next to his ear, succeeding in eliciting a chuckle from him.
After that, you help him with his daily routine. Charles isn’t heavy, and you manage to get him onto the bed, his frail body yielding to your gentle support.
You slip the rest of his body beneath the blankets, tucking him in carefully before handing him two pills and a glass of water. “All the way down, okay? And I wanna see that tongue after you swallow them.”
If looks could kill, you’d be six feet under, covered in dust and dirt. Charles sticks his tongue out, putting the glass down on his nightstand. “Happy?”
“You’ve got no idea how much,” you say, adjusting the covers. The silence of the tank surrounds you both, and you can sense his gaze lingering on you. You flick your eyes up, furrowing your brows as you sit in the small space beside him on the mattress. “What is it?”
“You fancy him, don’t you?”
Freezing on the spot, your eyes narrow. “I—I don’t—” you trail off, pushing the words out with some effort. “Are you trying to read my mind?”
His whole chest rumbles with laughter under your touch. He finds your hand once again, intertwining your fingers with his. “Don’t be so naïve. I don’t need my abilities to see the way you get all flustered when he passes by. Why do you think they say older people are wiser?” he inquires, his lips forming a straight line. “We’ve lived too much not to notice the most common things, my dear—and let me tell you that you do a horrible job at pretending.”
“Of course I like him. Logan’s a good man, he keeps us safe.” You glance down at your hands—his, weak and delicate, in evident contrast to your own. “I’m not in love with him, Cupid.”
“Oh, you should’ve seen him years ago,” Charles says, his eyes glazing over as he drifts back into the past. His body remains here, within the confines of the room, but his mind is elsewhere, somewhere far away. You give his hand a gentle tug, trying to bring him back. “When we took him in, he was pursuing a career as a cage fighter. I had never seen anyone like him in all my years of educating mutants. He was so… different from the rest. Reserved, didn’t talk much at first. But I gave him a family, I—” His voice falters, overcome by his own emotions.
That’s when you realize he’s no longer with you, his gaze unfocused, looking around the tank as if seeing it for the first time. It pains you to see him like this, completely disoriented and disconnected from reality.
“Why are we here? What has happened to the rest? Has he told you anything?”
These are the questions he asks every day without fail—questions that you can’t, nor want, to answer. Since you’re not exactly sure the explanation would soothe his troubled mind, you feel forced to play dumb.
“I don’t know, Charles. We don’t really talk that much, Logan and I.” You stand from the bed, not without pressing a chaste kiss to his forehead before. You smile at him, hoping he doesn’t realize the gesture lacks authenticity. “Why don’t you get some rest? I’ll let you know if I hear anything worth sharing.”
Once you close the door behind you, you settle back into it, releasing a shaky breath. Being Charles’ caregiver was a challenging task, especially in moments like these, which required immense internal strength not to crumble in front of him.
You squeeze your eyes shut as you adjust to the harsh sunlight, fighting to regain your composure. When you finally scan the area, the only thing that meets your eye is the deserted smelting plant you now call home.
You open the sliding door, the noise breaking the stillness and forcing Logan to look up from his plate. He’s eating like a starved man, casually drinking from a small bottle of whisky on the table, already half of it gone. After those long drives through the nights and the early hours, he always returns hungry.
You pour yourself a cup of coffee, setting it on the stove to heat. Neither of you says anything for a few minutes: he eats, and you sip your hot coffee in silence, not wishing to disturb the breakable peace that hangs by a thread.
Thinking this is how the noon will continue, you begin to walk toward your room until he clears his throat, stopping you in your tracks. That simple gesture makes you whirl around, anticipating something.
“This is delicious,” he acknowledges, pointing to his plate with his fork, the rice with veggies and meat you cooked last night nearly gone. Dipping his chin, he adds in a low voice: “Thank you.”
You’re taken aback by his unexpected willingness to engage in conversation. Moments like these are as rare as seeing Halley’s Comet, so you proceed with caution, as if you’re approaching a skittish animal—one wrong move, and the opportunity is lost.
Setting your mug down on the table, you sit on the chair opposite him. Deep down, the hammering of your heart echoes in your ears, and you hope his sharp senses don’t pick up on it.
“I’m glad you liked it. Charles ate two bowls of it,” you explain, unable to suppress a smile. Logan hums, tilting his head to the side as he keeps devouring his meal. You take another sip of your coffee, blowing on it in a futile attempt to cool it down. “He wants to talk to you.”
“Huh?”
“Charles. He—he asks to see you a lot,” you begin, carefully choosing your words. “I know it’s none of my business, but I think it would make him feel better if you spent more time with him.”
The sound of a distant train rumbles through the walls, amplifying the silence between you. Logan doesn’t utter a word; instead, he puts down his fork, the clinking noise making you jump slightly, the intensity of his stare becoming overwhelming.
“You’re right about one thing—what I do or don’t do is none of your goddamn business.”
Just like that, the buildup dissolves in a matter of seconds. You bite down on the inside of your cheek, nodding absentmindedly. “I’m sorry,” you murmur, feeling a wave of shame wash over you. How stupid were you to think he might want to talk to you? “I just—I want to be of help.”
“Just take care of Charles. That’s all you gotta worry about, all I’ve ever asked you to do,” he barks, clenching his jaw, and you can tell he means each word.
When he talks to you in this tone, it makes you think more rationally—it reminds you that you don’t really know him, and yet you agreed to work for him in exchange for a roof over your head and food on your plate. He’s not your friend, and he’s excellent at making that crystal clear every time you cross the line.
Logan pushes you away like you’re nothing, like you’re just another of the many burdens he has to deal with.
It should be enough to send you running to your room, but despite the knot tightening in your belly, you somehow remain rooted in place, your eyes sharp like daggers.
As another train echoes in the silence, you come to terms with the knowledge that one more question will drive him away.
And sometimes, you speak before you think, as you do now: “Whose blood is that on your shirt?” you ask, voice steady and cold. Perhaps it’s you who wants him to leave this time.
He shakes his head with offense, frustration crinkling his eyes. “I don’t need this shit,” he groans, his gruff voice loud enough for you to hear it. He gets up from the table, placing his plate in the sink without much delicacy. At last, he heads to his room, slamming the door with a deafening thud that reverberates through the entire place.
It’s not a crush, that voice deep inside you insists as you’re left alone in the kitchen. And it’s valid: a mere crush wouldn't cause this kind of pain, wouldn’t make your chest feel this heavy and your limbs numb.
Whenever he leaves, he takes a part of you with him, never to be returned. By now, you’re certain he’s stolen all those missing pieces from you, and you’ve got no idea how much longer you can endure before you shatter completely.
You seem to have won this battle, but what you end up losing is far greater than any fleeting gratification.
Loving Logan is maddening, to say the least.
To this day, you still recall every detail of the night that altered the course of your life—the night you met Logan.
The memories are rather vivid in your mind, and you revisit that moment on nights like these, when you can’t sleep and the past appears to be much more appealing than your present.
Pressing your cheek against the cold pillow, you let your eyelids drop, reconstructing the full scene behind your sealed eyes.
It was your third week working at that restaurant, and you were still getting used to its daily rhythm. Waitressing was working wonders for you—you had a good memory, and people often gave you generous tips.
Everything was going well: you were the only waitress on shift, and your boss had left for a brief errand, promising he would be back soon.
During this lull, a group of men entered the restaurant, already drunk or high—probably both. They sat at one of the empty tables, immediately calling for you.
One of them, a tall blonde, was the loudest. “Come here, baby.” He pointed his finger at you, gesturing for you to approach him. The nickname felt wrong rolling off his tongue, and as you obliged, he shoved a handful of bills into the front pocket of your apron. He clutched your waist, dragging you nearer. “I’m getting married tomorrow. Think you can do something special for me?”
His friends cheered him on, laughing and pounding their fists on the table. You managed to slip from his grasp and asked them what they wanted to order.
While they took their time deciding, you noticed a limousine parked in the distance, probably the vehicle that had brought these morons here. The driver rolled down his window, hanging his arm from the armrest.
Though you couldn’t see his features, the interaction alone was enough to make you look away.
An hour went by, and the men refused to take off. They’d eaten, drunk, and danced—and driven you crazy in the process. The rest of the customers had decided to leave once they realized the night was far from finishing for the noisy group of friends. You apologized, feeling incapable of doing anything to change the situation.
Your sanity felt threatened as you turned off the TV, ending the sixth round of karaoke, their shouts and hoots ringing in your ears.
“We’re closing in ten minutes,” you informed them, starting to collect their dirty plates and glasses. Out of the corner of your eye, you spotted the blonde man standing right beside you, his piercing blue eyes burning holes through your skin. He attempted to graze your shoulder, but you quickly stepped back, keeping a safe distance between you. “How do you plan to pay? Cash or credit?”
“How about with a kiss, huh?” He inched forward, his face dangerously close to yours. Unaccustomed to being approached in this manner, you ducked your head, unsure of your next move. His breath reeked of beer and vodka, a horrendous combination that had you nearly gagging on the spot.
As he backed you against the counter, one of his large hands cradled your face, urging you to make eye contact with him. “I swear I can be very, very nice. You haven’t given me the chance to show it yet.”
“Hey, pal. You said one hour.”
The first time you heard his voice—low and husky, the kind that could send shivers down your spine.
Your eyes locked with Logan’s, your pleading gaze seemingly stirring something in him as he got a grip on the situation. His brows bumped together in a scowl, and you didn’t miss how he limped as he made his way into the restaurant.
There was something about him—how he moved, his stance—that felt strangely familiar.
“We’re busy in here, chauffeur,” the blue-eyed man protested, slightly losing his balance while still holding your cheek.
Your rescuer squared off against him, their noses practically brushing. He worked his jaw, his half-lidded, tired eyes taking in the sight of you. “I’m no fortune-teller, but I don’t think she’s into you, bub.”
“Come again?” the blonde guy released you, much more concerned with defending his bruised pride. “What’s the matter, Grandpa? Is it past your bedtime?”
“I want you to pay me for the ride, and for waiting a fucking hour and a half for you and your friends,” the older man spat, jerking his thumb toward the limousine. “I’m not taking you back to the hotel. You might want to start looking’ for another driver.”
The group of men closed in around him, their anger bubbling. “That’s not cool, dude. We had a deal,” another voice snapped, but Logan couldn’t seem to care less.
“Well, the deal’s off. And leave the girl alone, will you?” he retorted, his tone dripping with disdain. “So, where’s my money?”
He couldn’t have predicted it. One of the men behind him swung a plate, striking him in the nape and catching him off guard. Logan collapsed to the floor, clutching his head in pain. The others took the opportunity and began to pummel him, kicks and punches landing wherever they could.
You screamed at the top of your lungs, desperately trying to intervene. You grabbed at their clothes, digging your fingernails into every patch of exposed skin you could find, but they shoved you aside with brutal force. Your back slammed against the nearest wall, a jolt of sudden pain making you wince.
The blood in your veins turned to ice as you watched, paralyzed with fear that they might kill him. But then—
Three metallic claws emerged from his knuckles, and he used them to push himself upright. Despite the blood smeared across his nose and mouth, he managed to stand, his quickened breathing coming out in short puffs.
The men backed away in shock, leaving him alone amidst the chaos.
You stared at him, your hands trembling as recognition dawned: it was The Wolverine.
The familiarity, the sense of having seen him before, all made sense now. It all flooded back in a rush—the comics, the news, the rumors.
“Get the hell outta my sight,” he growled, pressing his claws against the fabric of the blue-eyed man’s jacket, making him flinch.
You couldn’t make out what you were feeling. It wasn’t fear, but intrigue. Even as the group of men fled the restaurant, you couldn’t tear your eyes away from him. At first, he avoided your gaze, focusing on his shoes as he retracted his claws.
Once the immediate danger had passed, he slumped forward, groaning. You gently draped one of his arms around your shoulders and helped him into a nearby chair. His weight felt like a thousand bricks, but you accomplished to get him seated.
He rubbed a shaky hand over his graying beard, his face twisting in pain as you pressed a makeshift towel of napkins against his lower lip, where blood continued to flow.
Taking the towel from you, he continued tending to himself. You scanned his features, scrutinizing him.
“You are…” you began, the words feeling inadequate at the moment.
Logan nodded hesitantly, his silence confirming your suspicion. “Yeah, that’s me,” he tugged at his shirt collar, exposing some of his chest hair, fresh blood staining his work clothes. Your gaze fell there, and you quickly chided yourself.
The poor guy was bleeding, and you were checking him out. Jeez.
Kneeling by his side, you introduced yourself. “Thank you for stepping up for me,” you said afterward, and he shook his head dismissively. “They were a pain in the ass. I don’t know how you even managed to drive them here.”
“Money’s money, darlin’. Doesn’t matter where it comes from, as long as—” he was interrupted by a coughing fit, and your concern deepened as you continued to spot more of his injuries. “I’ll heal,” he reassured you, his expression softening in an attempt to calm your anxiety.
Your eyes pierced his with an intensity that seemed to unsettle him. Warmth crept into your cheeks as a question surfaced in your mind: “Is there anything I can do for you?”
“You don’t owe me anything, kid,” he replied, a hint of gruffness in his voice.
“But I could help you,” you persisted, your voice betraying a touch of eagerness. Stifling a cough, you tried to mask your enthusiasm, and sighed. “Are you hungry? I could cook you something, or pour you a drink. We’ve got plenty of liquor—”
Logan interrupted you, placing the towel down on the table. “Have you ever taken care of an old person?”
Tilting your head, you considered his question. “How old?”
“Ninety-somethin’.”
You nodded, memories of the events from years ago surfacing. “I lived with my grandparents for most of my life. When they fell ill, I spent a lot of time with them. My mom had to work long hours, and I—well, the point is, I did take care of them,” you paused for an instant, his expression unreadable, though you perceived a slight relaxation in his posture, as if your answer had put him at ease. “I like being around old people. They have stories to tell,” you added, a genuine smile breaking through, “and I’m a good listener.”
“Then I suppose there is somethin’ you can help me with.”
And so began a new chapter in your life.
The very next day, you were moving in with him and Charles. It took several weeks for the latter to warm up to you and get used to your presence.
Initially, he was hopeful that you might also be a mutant, but his disappointment was palpable when he discovered you lacked any supernatural gifts. Leaving that aside, he valued your company.
“The shots mellow the seizures. The pills keep them from happening,” Logan had once explained, detailing the medications Charles needed. You recalled the psychic attack from a year ago and its consequences, but that wasn’t a topic to be discussed with Logan, and you understood why.
“Where do you get these?” you asked, examining the bottle of pills with a curious glance. “Without a prescription, I mean.”
“Oh, you don’t wanna know.”
Soon, you got adapted to the whole package: his unpredictable temperament, his mood swings, and his nightmares. Logan Howlett was a puzzle box of surprises, one you could never quite unlock.
Fast forward to the present day, you realize it must be already late, because Logan’s heading to work. You stand on your tiptoes, peering out of your bedroom window. Your humid breath fogs the glass as his eyes find yours, and then he slips into the vehicle, blending into the shadows of the night.
The distant rumble of his limousine signals his departure, your forehead pressed against the glass, as if somehow that could take you with him.
There goes another piece of you.
You find yourself shaving Charles the moment worry takes over your senses.
He’s retelling a familiar story: that one time Logan, Scott, Jean, and Storm saved Rogue from Magneto.
On any other day, you wouldn’t mind listening to his stories, despite having heard them countless times. This one in particular is your favorite.
But today, it’s hard to focus on it, even more when one of its main characters is missing in action.
Logan hasn’t come back home yet.
It’s been an entire day, and he’s usually back by morning to rest. Now, after having cooked dinner and helping Charles shower, you’ve run out of distractions. There’s nothing left to occupy your thoughts, nothing to ease the building anxiety gnawing at you.
You texted him multiple times—no answer. You even called—also nothing. Every time Charles asks if Logan’s at work or sleeping, the knot in your chest tightens. That’s when your mind starts to spiral, and you’re convinced you’ll burst any moment.
After putting him to bed, you pace the kitchen, picking at your nails and biting the raw skin around them. The sting of pain is there, but it’s faint, not enough to overshadow the real fear clawing at your insides.
All these what-ifs that storm through your mind make you feel nauseous: what if he’s dead? What would you do with Charles? How would you provide for both of you without a salary?
Just as you’re about to dial his number again, Logan materializes out of thin air through the sliding door.
He’s got a dark bruise under his right eye, and his once-white shirt is littered with bloodstains. You stare at him—he’s limping harder than usual, each of his movements slower.
Walking towards him, your hands cup his face. His skin feels rough beneath your fingers, and he lets out a grunt as you graze his split lip. “What happened?”
“They were followin’ me. Had been doin’ so for a few days now,” he says, making no effort to pull away.
“Did you kill them?” you wonder out loud, still inspecting his injuries. The pad of your thumb hovers inches away from his bruised mouth.
Covering your hands with his, Logan ducks his head, closing his eyes for a brief second and swallowing thickly. “Somebody had to do it, sweetheart.”
You limit yourself to a nod, because you know there’s nothing you can reproach him for. You were no stranger to the idea of him killing. It was an implicit truth between you.
“I thought—I was so scared, and I—” your voice wavers, and you feel your eyes watering, the tears prickling at the corners. “I thought you—”
He doesn’t let you finish, already knowing how it would end. “Hey, look at me,” he’s the one touching you now, tilting your chin up. Your eyes keep flickering over the cuts and old scars you spot on his cheeks, his neck. Logan forces a pained smile, unable to hide his discomfort. “It’s fine, I’m alright. Just a bit fucked up, but nothin’ you haven’t seen before,” he jokes, trying to lighten the mood, and it works. You bite your lower lip, suppressing your grin. “I always come back, don’t I?”
“But you can barely stand,” you whisper, not sure why you’re speaking so softly. You make him turn his back to you, helping him shrug off his coat. As expected, remnants of dried blood decorate his shirt like highlights. “Let me help you.”
“I don’t—”
”There are cuts all over your back. And your chest—you’re not healing properly,” you say, turning him to face you again. The look on his face suggests only one thing: he’s about to throw in the towel. “You don’t have to do everything on your own.” You think you’ve never been this close before, his proximity both intoxicating and comforting at the same time. “Please.”
He ends up giving in to your persuasion, allowing you to guide him to the bathroom. Logan sits down on the toilet, watching you gather supplies to clean his wounds. When you come back, he’s still staring at you, his eyelashes fluttering together each time he blinks.
Starting with his cheek, you press a damp towel to his skin, and he hisses. It takes everything in you not to flinch in sympathy.
“How’s Charles?” he asks, probably trying to distract himself as you continue to clean his wounds, the towel darkening with his blood over time.
“He’s doing great. Asked for you a lot, actually,” you take a look at his jaw, where one shallow cut is already starting to fade away thanks to his healing ability, something that never fails to amaze you.
Logan hums, tilting his head. ”I’ll check on him in the morning,” he murmurs, and you flash him a quick smile, finishing with his face. He’s now free of dirt and blood, his brows furrowing as he pauses to collect his thoughts. “The other day, when we talked—”
You cut him off, turning to the sink as you rinse the towel, watching the water get red. “Forget it.”
“No, it wasn’t okay—how I acted,” he stands up from the toilet, and you feel his presence behind you, the alarm inside your head going off as the space between you shrinks. “I know you just want what’s best for him. For us. I’m sorry I was a jerk,” his voice comes out even huskier at this time of the night, sounding afraid of waking someone, even though it’s just the two of you here.
“Apology accepted,” you swirl around to meet his gaze, only to find yourself nose-to-nose with him, and you lean back against the sink, your spine pressed into the cool surface.
Logan places his hands on both sides of the vanity, caging you with his body. Like the most beautiful tree, he stands tall in front of you, and you take a deep breath, getting drunk on his distinctive scent. “Are you… okay?”
You watch as he lowers his head, pursing his lips before muttering: “Imma need you to do something more for me,” he says, almost pleading, and you can’t avoid the amount of thoughts that rush into your mind.
Gone was your decency when you had to deal with him.
That’s when he looks up to find your eyes, his harsh expression evolving into a more vulnerable one. “Have you ever removed a bullet?”
If you thought listening to Logan’s nightmares was painful, nothing could have prepared you for the sounds he makes while you pull several bullets from his wounds.
He sits shirtless in front of you, grunting at each of your careful movements. As you remove one bullet lodged near his ribs, Logan practically yells, and you rest your cheek against his, desperate to ease his suffering.
“I’m sorry, I’m sorry. Almost done,” you whisper into his ear, hoping your words might bring him some relief. He lets his head fall forward, resting it on your shoulder, trusting you enough to tend to his injuries, his thoughts drifting elsewhere.
It takes you half an hour to clean both his chest and back, but Logan doesn’t complain. When you’re finished, he goes straight to his room, flopping onto his bed, the mattress creaking under his weight. You see the way his chest rises and falls rapidly, his breathing still labored.
You wish you could lie beside him, even just for a few minutes, but your last shred of self-control stops you from doing such a thing.
“Get some sleep,” you say leaning against the doorframe, your advice sounding more like a plea. He looks exhausted, dark circles sunken beneath his eyes.
Logan lets out a bitter laugh. “Do I look that bad?”
You roll your eyes at that, your fingers curling around the doorknob. Glancing back at him over your shoulder, you catch something in his look—a glimmer of something you struggle to put into words, but you decide not to look further into it. “Good night, Logan.”
“Good night, darlin’—and thank you,” he murmurs, holding your gaze until the door shuts between you.
Then you sprint to your room, gently closing the door before biting back a smile, replaying the last hour in your mind. How close to you he had been, how comfortable he seemed around you.
You hadn’t just crossed lines—you’d broken them. You almost pinch yourself to make sure you weren’t dreaming.
Somehow, your racing mind calms down, and you fall asleep, one hand tucked beneath the pillow, the other resting against your chest.
You’re a light sleeper. The sound of something shattering wakes you, leaving you startled and disoriented.
Dawn is just breaking, the first rays of sunlight slipping through your window. You sit up, pricking up your ears as you scratch the back of your head, listening attentively.
Logan’s voice filters into your room—he lets out a string of profanities, and you stifle a giggle, throwing off your covers and putting on a sweatshirt that matches your pajamas.
Barefoot, you walk down the hall, stopping at the kitchen’s entrance. Logan is kneeling beside the table, gathering the shards of a broken mug. It seems like he’s just gotten out of the shower, tiny droplets of water trailing down his neck.
“That was my favorite one,” you say in a low voice, teasing him. His back muscles flex under the material of his shirt, and he turns to look at you, his expression a silent apology. “I take it you’re not using your glasses?”
“I’m gonna stop you right there.” Rising to his feet, he grunts, digging his fingers into his lower back with a grimace. “They’re called readers for a reason.”
You decide to let him have that one, grabbing a new mug from the shelf and handing it to him. He accepts it, thanking you, and fills it with freshly brewed coffee.
“Was it a nightmare?” you ask, watching as he sinks into the couch, spreading his thighs apart with a sigh while you take a seat at the table instead.
Logan gives a nod, sipping some of his coffee. “At least I slept for a few hours.”
“Are you really going to stay up? It’s pretty early.” You stretch your arms over your head, a yawn escaping you before you can hold it back.
“Wouldn’t be the first time.”
You hesitate for a moment, but then comes your question: “Can I join you?” You prop your elbows on your knees, any trace of sleepiness now gone with the wind.
He squints his eyes, his unrelenting stare boring into you. “Feel free.”
So here you are, studying him as he drinks his coffee, his fingers wrapped tightly around the ceramic. There are so many things you want to ask him—about how he’s feeling, if his wounds have healed—but it seems you’ve entered a silent staring contest without even knowing it.
Not that you mind him looking at you—you just want to know the reason why.
You snort, and he arches a brow. “Do I have something on my face?” You decide to ask him, straightening your back.
“I guess I can’t help but wonder why you agreed to all of this,” he says, setting the mug down with a soft clink. By this, you understand he’s referring to being Charles’ caregiver and leaving your old job behind. “I mean—you could be doing better things with your life. Why would you choose to do this?”
“I told you before: I wanted to help you,” you shrug, trying to keep your tone light even as your stomach tightens with nerves. You watch as Logan folds his arms, the muscles of his biceps becoming more visible. “Plus, I love being around Charles.
“I don’t think people your age would be that interested in spending their days like this,” he says, and you toy with a lock of your hair, wrapping it around your finger.
“Well, good thing I’m not like most people my age then.”
His silence hangs heavy in the air until he speaks again. “What do you mean by that?”
“You know that feeling when life seems like a race? And you just have to keep up with certain things that everybody else is doing, or you’ll be left behind?” You pause, the words falling more naturally than you’d expected.
Logan nods, making it seem like he understands what you’re trying to say. Whether he truly does it or not, you don’t know.
“When my friends started going to parties, getting boyfriends… I couldn’t. My family wouldn’t let me. And even when I could, it felt like it wasn’t really what I wanted.”
Inhaling sharply, you stop yourself. The conversation suddenly feels far too personal.
“You never had a boyfriend?” He gets more comfortable on the couch, his voice gruff as he rubs his chin, waiting for a reply.
A familiar heat settles between your legs. “I went out with some guys, but it never led to anything serious,” you say, your cheeks getting warmer the more details you share with him. “I guess I wasn’t the kind of girl they were looking for,” you add, not missing the way his lips twitch momentarily.
“How could they not want you?”
“They didn’t think like you do.”
“That’s because they were boys, not men,” he mutters, his gaze dropping to your hands before returning to your face. “Did they treat you right, those boys?”
Swallowing hard, you can hardly register the uncertainty in your own voice. “I mean… yes, I think they did. They were nice to me.”
There it is—the faintest hint of a smirk dancing on his lips. “Nice doesn’t mean good, though.”
You dig your nails onto the table, your pulse quickening, trying to hide how affected you are by his words. “What is it that you want to know?”
“Come sit with me, doll.”
Doll. Doll. Doll. Inside your chest, your heart gallops, your legs trembling as you get off the table, moving closer to him.
Feeling lighter with every step you take, you plop down beside him, and Logan sits straighter, his knees almost bumping into yours.
You can’t bring yourself to look at him—this is happening, just like in your filthiest dreams.
His hand slides up to yours, not applying any sort of pressure. He scrutinizes your skin, bringing your hand to his lips, and he presses a kiss to the inside of your wrist.
It tickles, it burns—it ignites a fire inside you, one you know you can’t ignore. A gasp attempts to escape you, but you suppress it.
“Did you let them touch you?” he whispers, attaching his mouth to your neck, brushing the sensitive spot where your jaw and ear meet.
This time, you moan, any possible rational thoughts turning into putty, melting with the way he’s touching you. “Logan,” you purr his name, begging for something, anything he’s willing to give you. Your thighs, once shoved together, spread of their own accord, and you hear him click his tongue.
“I asked you something.” His teeth graze your pulse point, forcing you to close your eyes.
“I didn’t. They wanted to, but I—I wouldn’t let them,” you answer, and as if he’s rewarding you, his fingers begin to tug on the hem of your sweatshirt, rolling it up your body and over your head. He tosses it to the floor, admiring you.
“Why?”
Goddamn.
“Because I was waiting for the right guy,” you manage to get out, grasping his hand and positioning it on top of your right breast, encouraging him to go on with what he had started. His pupils widen further, and he squeezes your tit roughly, eliciting a moan from you. “I think I’ve found him.”
Logan scans your face, searching for any sign of repentance in your expression. “I’m going to hell for this,” he murmurs under his breath, his hard-on noticeable through his tented sweatpants. “Lay down.” You obey his command, easing yourself onto the couch, and sinking into the cushions as he presses himself to your side.
He peppers your neck with kisses, playing with the waistband of your shorts. “I’m not gonna kiss you, but I’ll make you feel good. Just this time, ‘kay? And we don’t talk about it.”
You accept his offer, knowing that you’ll probably regret it in a couple of hours. Right now, it doesn’t matter. You need his electrifying touch, his fingers, his—
With a swift motion, your shorts are yanked down your legs, and his calloused hands part your thighs even wider. A damp spot on your underwear sells you out, and his thumb rubs gentle circles over that area, causing you to lift your hips.
“So this is what you look like when you touch yourself, huh?” He edges his fingers closer to your clit, his breath tickling your ear, and he dips his tongue into your collarbone. “I hear you all the fuckin’ time. You’re not as quiet as you think.”
It should embarrass you, the fact that he has listened to you pleasuring yourself. But in a moment like this, it only succeeds in fuelling your desire. “Please. You said you’d make me feel good.”
“And I will, but you’re greedy as hell,” he says, his movements more deliberate now. You feel hot all over as he pulls your panties to the side, exposing your glistening cunt.
Logan’s on the verge of drooling all over you, reaching for your folds and spreading your wetness. “Men aren’t strong creatures, honey. You’ve got no idea how hard it is to hold back.”
“D-don’t hold back,” you stutter, losing your composure when he returns to your clit, his fingers coated in your arousal while they flick your swollen bud. “Oh, Logan…”
“You make the prettiest sounds,” he rasps, mouthing at your jaw, though as you try to kiss him, he slows his pace. “What’s wrong? Am I not giving you enough?”
“Sorry. I’m sorry,” you whisper, fascinated by how big his fingers look in comparison to your pussy. “I’m just—”
“Needy, I know,” he finishes for you, and he picks up his merciless rhythm again. Heat pools in your lower abdomen, and you can’t help but arch your back every time he teases you, grazing your entrance with his middle finger. “Don’t get ahead of yourself.”
You dig your nails into his arm, relishing the way his body responds to your touch. He grinds his cock against your hip, his teeth nipping at the column of your neck. “I want to come. Please, make me come,” you sob, letting out a shaky breath.
A thin sheen of sweat covers your forehead, and Logan locks eyes with you after what feels like an eternity. “Please, Lo.”
The nickname snaps something inside of him. His fingers circle your clit with a fervency you hadn’t experienced before, your pleasure seemingly being his primary focus. “The shit I’d do for you.”
You warn him, telling him you’re close—so so so close—until the fire in your belly flares, and blood rushes to your ears. You collapse against him, holding his hand firmly against your core, hips jerking as you ride your orgasm.
The world narrows down to this—this moment, your most desired fantasy.
Logan holds you as you go limp in his arms, rubbing your clit ever so slightly, murmuring soft praises. “Y’did so good, sweetheart,” he whispers, planting a kiss on your temple, burying his nose in your hair. You’re still out of breath, the pulsing between your parted legs persisting long after your release. “Told you you weren’t quiet.”
A giggle bubbles up from your chest, his beard tickling you as he slides his hands up under your shirt, finding your nipples.
“It was n-nice,” you tell him, your voice faltering the more he toys with your hardened peaks. Your skin heats up again, heart racing at the thought that he isn’t done with you yet.
“Just nice?” One of his hands makes its way back into your pussy, ghosting his fingers over your hole, and he smirks when he feels you squirm. “You surely know how to hurt a man’s pride.”
“I wasn’t—I didn’t mean to—” You can’t structure a proper sentence, not when he’s playing with you like this.
Logan rubs your arousal between his fingers, as though he wants you to see how slick you still are, even after coming. “Are you going to touch me again?”
He hums, feigning uncertainty. “What do you think, baby? Should I make you come with my fingers now?”
It’s like a switch flips in your mind. He knows exactly how to make you beg and which buttons to push, using that power to his advantage. “Yes, please. I want it,” you plead, intending to buck your hips into his touch, impatient for more.
“Do you fuck yourself with your fingers?”
“Sometimes, but I can never finish—Oh my God.” He slips one finger inside you, causing you to curse, your voice barely above a whisper. You clench around the intrusion, your head falling back onto the cushions. “Fuck me.”
“In a minute.” He begins to thrust his finger in and out, gathering your juices every time he goes back to hammering that sweet spot in your interior. Soon, one finger becomes two, and he reduces you to a panting mess.
Tears threaten to swell in your eyes, and you whine as he involves his other hand in the matter, furiously rubbing your clit. “Your fingers feel much better than m-mine, Lo.”
“I can tell.” He curls them just right, and you push back against his thrusts, tilting your pelvis to meet him halfway. “There you go. Take what you need, sweetheart. I’m right here, I’ve got you.”
Everything feels frenzied, fast, the way your inner walls spam and contract around his fingers as you chase your second climax.
Once you come down from your high, your blurred vision catches him tugging the waistband of his sweatpants down. His cock springs free, and he fists himself, stroking his length angrily.
You watch as some pre-cum dribbles from the head, and you lean forward, watching it closely.
“You look goddamn beautiful when you come, darlin’,” he murmurs through gritted teeth, his jaw clenched tight. Hovering over you, he rucks your shirt up until he can see your tits from above. He alternates between your breasts, squeezing them while he continues to stroke his girth. “Want to see these all dirty.”
Logan truly loses it when your hand reaches out to him, tracing a bulging vein near the head of his cock. You meet his lustful gaze, batting your lashes, and then you feel his come splashing against your bare chest, a choked moan escaping Logan’s throat, spurts of his hot seed landing on your skin.
“Fuckin’ hell… fuck,” he grunts, still tugging at his cock, enamored with the masterpiece he’s created. When it’s finally over, he lies beside you, hiding his face in the crook of your neck. You run your fingers through his hair, and he nuzzles further into your touch with a groan. “I’m too old for this.”
Minutes pass as both of you seem to grasp the gravity of what has just happened. Eventually, Logan rises to his feet, disappearing for a brief moment before coming back with a towel to wipe his come off your stomach and chest.
He’s gentle with you, his gaze trained on his task until his eyes flick up to meet yours.
“Don’t look at me like that,” he says, pulling your shorts back up.
“Like what?”
“Like you want to see right through me.” He adjusts your shirt to cover your body again, but the towel remains in his hand, a reminder of the previous events.
I’m not gonna kiss you, but I’ll make you feel good. Just this time, ‘kay? And we don’t talk about it.
You don’t have to talk about it. You definitely don’t.
Two days later, he’s the one who comes looking for you.
You’re nearly asleep when he knocks on your door. “Come in,” you mumble, a bit of drool having dampened your pillow. You dry your mouth with the back of your hand, your back turned to the door.
He steps into your room cautiously, as if navigating a minefield. The mattress dips under his weight. “Were you sleeping?” he asks, caressing your leg over the covers.
You shift onto your back, your body responding before your mind. There’s no blood on his clothes—that makes you feel a bit better, and you shake your head.
“Good.” He looms closer, fumbling with his belt. His thumb applies little pressure to your lower lip, and your mouth parts to let him in, salivating.
This is just like Pavlov’s dog experiment—except that Logan isn’t an experimenter, and you aren’t a dog.
Yet, when he approaches you like this, you can’t help but respond, settling into a routine where you both take take take from each other.
Logan doesn’t fuck you, even when you beg him to. He gets you off with his fingers, his thigh, his mouth—but his cock remains out of the equation.
“Just the tip,” you plead, voice laced with pure need, when he’s got his face nestled between your legs.
As he stops eating you out, his beard shiny with your arousal, he’s still got that angry look on his face. Your cries don’t get to him.
“That lie’s older than me.” He slips his fingers back inside you, aiming to make you drop the subject. “Come on, baby. Gotta get ready for work, but you need to come first.”
Nor does he stay the night after telling you you’re the most gorgeous girl he’s ever seen in his life. Just when you think he’s fallen asleep, his legs intertwined with yours and one of his large hands under your head, you drift off.
By the time morning comes, he’s gone. You just know that when night falls, he’ll be back for more, drawn to you like a moth to a flame.
Despite all that, Logan won’t kiss you. He keeps his promise, and you hate how determined he is.
“Not even once?” you ask him one night while going over the scars on his back. You’re in his bed this time, and he has his nose buried in his pillow, moments away from dozing off.
“No,” he answers, squirming slightly under your touch. “I’m tired. Stop doing that.”
“How did you get this one?” You trace one scar that’s close to his shoulder, resting your chin just inches from it.
He turns his face to see your eyes. “Well, I was doing Pilates, and I—Hey!” He laughs when you pinch the skin near his ribs, tickling him. “I don’t even remember. Must’ve got it a long time ago.”
“Did it hurt?” It’s a dumb question, but he doesn’t mention it.
His index finger grazes your cheek, and he chuckles at the way your eyelids flutter. “In the past, they all did. But not anymore,” he replies, though you wish you could believe him.
You know he’s in pain most days. That when he goes down on you, and he’s on his knees for too long, he has trouble standing up without cursing. That no amount of alcohol, or his healing ability, helps him with it.
You kiss each of his scars before curling against his side, brushing your nose against his. “And now?” Your eyes fall to his lips, silently hoping he’ll say Yes.
Instead, he sighs. “I think we should go to sleep.”
So despite the lack of kisses, the miscommunication, and the fact that he won’t fuck you even though you know—you feel—he wants to, things are good between you.
Charles notices it, openly expressing his recent realization. “He looks happier, doesn’t he?” he asks says after winning two games of chess in a row, startling you.
“Logan, you mean?”
“Yes, my dear.”
You glance down at the board, fidgeting with the pieces. “I guess so.”
“You guess so?” he parrots your previous words, raising an eyebrow in doubt. “Look at me,” he says, and as you do it, he points a shaky finger toward your neck. “I assume mosquitos have taken a liking to you.”
Heat rises to your cheeks, your hand flying up to cover the hickey you had completely forgotten about in the first place. “Charles, I’m—“
“Are you happy?” he interrupts you, and you nod, because you are.
A nagging thought lingers at the back of your mind. You don’t know if you’re asking for too much, but it still feels like something’s missing.
One morning, you accidentally overhear a conversation between them. The door of the tank is ajar, and right before you step inside, you recognize Logan’s voice in the distance.
“Charles, I’m fine, alright? I don’t need your advice.”
There’s a pause before Charles responds. “You know, Logan… this is what life looks like. You should take a moment and feel it. You still have time.”
Logan doesn’t say anything in response to that. And if he does, you don’t stick around long enough find out, because you’re already turning on your heel.
A poet once said: “Blowjobs are fucking amazing.”
Actually, you might be wrong. Those may not have been a poet’s words, but your best friend Keira’s from high school.
You remember the sleepovers at her place—she had a boyfriend at the time, a boy she had met at a party you hadn’t been invited to.
“Welcome to blowjobs 101,” she had declared one night, holding a hairbrush like a microphone. “Don’t worry, sweetie. I’ll tell you everything you need to know when the moment comes.”
Luckily, many years later, that moment arrived.
Just ten minutes ago, you were cooking dinner, sniffling back tears while chopping onions, so lost in thought that you didn’t realize Logan was already home.
He tossed his keys onto the table, hugging you from behind seconds later. You leaned back against his chest, enjoying the scratch of his beard against your sensitive skin, his lips planting soft kisses wherever they could.
“How was work?” you dropped the knife, wiping your tears as you turned to face him, throwing your arms around his neck. Logan pulled you in tighter by the waist, giving your ass a firm squeeze.
“Hell, as usual,” he looked into your eyes, finding them all glossy. “You miss me so much you started crying?”
Of course, you didn’t talk about it—but words aren’t the only ones who can convey meaning.
You’re not sure how, but one thing led to another, and now you’re on your knees, Logan’s cock filling your mouth. Your lips, swollen and red, suck hard at his tip, pulling the foreskin back, and his hips jerk deeper into your throat. “That’s it, fuck. Doin’ so good.”
Your movements are far from graceful. As a matter of fact, it’s all too sloppy and desperate. Saliva drips down your chin, some of it coating his balls, and you fondle them at the same time you bob your head.
Keira’s advice plays on repeat in your mind, and you pull out every trick you know to make Logan roll his eyes.
So far, you think you’re doing pretty great, judging by the way he’s gripping the back of your head.
“H-how is this your first time suckin’ cock?” he slurs, more to himself, his voice strangled as you make eye contact with him. He brushes your hair out of your face, bewitched by the sight of him disappearing into your wet mouth. “God, I fuckin’ love you.”
Taken aback by his sudden confession. you involuntarily gag around him. He pulls you off his cock, not even sparing you a glance, tucking himself back into his briefs. “Wait, Logan—”
“Not now,” he mutters abruptly, withdrawing into his bedroom and shutting the door behind him.
God, I fuckin’ love you.
God, I fuckin’ love you.
God, I fuckin’ love you.
But still, he doesn’t want to talk about it.
How bad is it to tell somebody you love them and then avoid them?
Yeah, it’s absolutely terrible, right? Tell that to the idiot himself—Logan Howlett.
It’s been over a week, and no matter how many times you press him for an explanation, he keeps dodging it.
Things go back to how they were before you two started fooling around, and Charles’ questions don’t take long to come: “I thought you two were getting somewhere.”
“Me too,” you admit, your voice quieter as you try to appear indifferent.
You have no answer for him. Not that you don’t want to discuss your relationship problems—it’s just that you don’t know what went wrong.
When evading you isn’t enough, he works longer hours, which only adds to how little you see him. At least he lets you know if he’s going to be late, sparing you from waiting up.
But apart from that, your interactions have dwindled to nothing, and it’s eating you alive.
You’re madly in love with him. You thought you knew that already, but now that he’s distant, the depth of your feelings has become clearer than ever.
He’s everywhere you go, just not physically—he has conquered your mind.
And it should be funny, loving someone who used to be no more than a myth for you. Though Logan is real—maybe too real for your own good—and he hasn’t been the mutant you once read about for quite some time.
This morning, he’s having breakfast at the table when you walk into the kitchen. You hold your breath as your shoulders brush for a microsecond, his gaze following your steps.
You’re no longer accustomed to sharing the same space with him, so it makes sense that you stay as far away as possible.
After an awkward silence, he stands up and mutters something about checking on Charles and giving him his meds, leaving you alone with your thoughts.
It’s infuriating, how collected he seems. Why isn’t he miserable like you? Doesn’t he miss you? Didn’t you two have something… special?
I’m not gonna kiss you, but I’ll make you feel good. Just this time, ‘kay? And we don’t talk about it.
The shit I’d for you.
God, I fuckin’ love you.
Not now.
The memory of his words lingers, seared into your unconscious, though the sound of his phone jolts you out of your thoughts.
It’s ringing beside the coffee machine, and you try to ignore it, determined to be the bigger person.
But after five minutes of the relentless ringtone echoing in the empty kitchen, you’ve had enough.
Unknown caller—interesting. What could he possibly be hiding?
Charles, you better keep that asshole busy, you think to yourself, swiping right to answer the call.
Before you can say anything, a woman’s voice fills the line.
“James! Thank God. It’s Gillian. You didn’t reply to any of my texts, and I was starting to get worried,” she lets out a giggle, the sound grating against your nerves.
As your grip on the phone tightens, your knuckles start to go white.
“Look, I know you said you weren’t available, but I haven’t been able to stop thinking about you since that ride. I didn’t see any ring on your finger, so what do you say, huh? Will you let me take you out?”
Red. You’re seeing red.
“James? Hello? Cat got your tongue?”
At last, you clear your throat. “Hey,” you greet her, pacing around the kitchen. “I’m deeply sorry, but James can’t talk right now.”
“Excuse me?” she snaps, her high-pitched voice echoing through the speakers, and you pull the device away from your ear. “This is James’ number. Who the fuck are you?”
“Oh, I’ll tell you who the fuck I am, you intolerant piece of—”
Before you can finish, the phone is yanked out of your hand, the call hastily ending.
There is no use in playing dumb, not when Logan’s standing right in front of you, observing you like you’re a child who’s made a severe mistake.
His deep, brown eyes pierce your soul, shattering any chance you had of coming up with an excuse.
“What where you doing with my phone?” It’s the first thing he asks you, his voice still steady, the calm before the storm.
Perhaps you’re not as mature as you thought you were—your forehead furrows, unwilling to back down, and you fall silent. He takes a step forward, as if he can’t believe your attitude. “Think I asked you somethin’. Why did you answer?”
“Gillian sounds like a lovely lady. Tell her I said ‘Hi’ the next time you see her,” you croak, attempting to walk past him, but he doesn’t budge, his solid frame blocking your path. You collide with his chest, and it feels like trying to move a brick wall without success.
“We’re talking. You can’t just leave.”
The nerve of this man.
“You can’t be serious,” you retort, staring at him, wishing the emotion in your tone could capture even a fraction of what you’re truly feeling. “Weren’t you the one who walked away first? After telling me you loved me?”
You search for any sign of the man who once held you close, but he feels miles away, hidden under all these layers that smell like cheap whiskey and gasoline. “You didn’t mean it.”
“I did. I meant every word,” he growls, his fists clenching at his sides, and you don’t miss the exhaustion in his eyes, the dark circles that expose the fragile façade of control he’s so desperate to maintain. “Goddamit! You’re doing that thing again!”
“What thing?” you exclaim, your mouth hanging open in frustration. “What the fuck are you talking about? I’m not doing anything.”
“Yes, you are! You’re trying to see through me, like you can read my mind.”
“Well, sorry to disappoint, but I’m not a fucking mutant. I just have eyes, Logan.” You throw your arms up, exasperated. “People actually look at each other when they have a conversation, in case you haven’t noticed.”
“You’re testing my patience,” he mutters, rubbing a hand over his face.
“And you are testing mine.” You rest your back against the table, raising your chin. “So, who is she?”
Logan drops his shoulders, slamming his eyes shut. “I drove her once, last week. It was a long ride and she… wouldn’t stop talking. Didn’t shut up for a single second. She hit on me, but I told her I’m off the market.”
“Why? ‘Cause she talked too much?”
“No. Because I love you,” he says, pure awe transforming his expression, like he doesn’t believe he has said it out loud. “I don’t know when I started feeling like this, or if I’ve always felt it, but—I do. I love you.”
Oh.
You had heard those words slip through his lips before, but now they sound different. It might be that keeping him at arm's length has felt like death by a thousand cuts, or perhaps it’s the realization that this is the first time someone’s declaring their love for you.
Fuck. He loves you. As in, he’s in love with you?
“Then why do you keep running?” You edge closer to him, your eyes trained on his. “I’m done with the chase, Logan. It’s tiring—I am tired. I’ve been sleeping like shit, trying to figure out what—”
His arms surround your body, cutting you off and pulling you close. The hammering of his heart matches yours, and you return the hug, nuzzling your nose against his neck.
You fear that this might be all you’ve ever needed, feeling as if the pieces he took from you in the past are finally falling back into place.
Logan holds you as if in a past life he lost you, but now, he’s decided to never let you go.
This profound sense of completeness, of being where you’re meant to be, makes you realize you’ve found home in the warmth of his embrace.
“I’m sorry. This… this scares me, alright?” he murmurs next to your ear, raking his fingers through your hair. “You make me feel things I didn’t think I could feel anymore. That’s what I’m running from—the part of me I thought was gone. But you… you brought it back.”
You feel a deep urge to curl up and cry, wondering why on earth he would ever think he was unworthy of being cared for. “Logan, I…”
“I sound pathetic, I know. It sounded way better in my head.”
“Don’t you dare say that.” You retreat a bit, looking him in the eye. He stares down at you with a tenderness you’ve never seen before. “It’s not pathetic to voice how you feel. I want to know it all, want to know everything about you.”
“Everything?”
“Yes, everything. But I need you to promise me that you won’t run away anymore. I know it’s difficult, but it’s not fair to any of us.”
His eyes peer directly into yours, and he gives a nod. “I promise to do my best.” He presses your foreheads together, and that’s when his mouth turns into a grin. “You’re not going to say it back?” he teases, gripping your waist. “Come on, I said it first. Twice, for the record.”
Lifting your shoulders in a half-shrug, you find it hard to conceal your smile. “I may need a bit more convincing.”
Kiss me. Kiss me. Kiss me.
Before you know it, his lips are on yours, almost making you lose your balance. You whimper into his mouth, tightening your arms around his neck as his tongue wastes no time in finding yours, stroking it sensually.
The wait had been definitely worth it—you’d do everything all over again if it meant having him kiss you like this at the end of the day.
He tilts your face so that he can deepen the kiss, and a whine gets caught in your throat when his fingers pull gently at the hair at your nape, nibbling at your bottom lip.
“I love you, too. Very much, to be honest,” you blurt out against his mouth, pleased with the way he laughs at your reaction, squeezing your hips. “But I still have some ideas in mind.”
“I’m all ears.”
Here goes nothing. “Fuck me like I’ve been asking you to.” You cup his cheek, guiding his lips into yours one more time. “Please,” you mewl, standing on your tiptoes. “Want you to be my first.”
If it were up to you, you would’ve begged him to take you right there on the kitchen floor. But Logan, ever the gentleman, insists on moving things to his room.
Each of his movements is slow, igniting your skin with a burning heat, leaving his name imprinted where his teeth sink into your soft flesh.
You’re left in nothing but your underwear by the time he murmurs: “Let me take my time with you.” He trails his lips down your chest, your stomach, until he’s planting several kisses along your ankle. “I don’t know how I got so lucky, baby. Look at you.”
Under his gaze, you feel shy, your eyes snapping to the ceiling instead. “Shut up,” you say, tugging at his shirt to undress him, your fingers tracing the lines of his abdomen before you pull him into a bruising kiss, sucking on his tongue.
He strips out of his black slacks and hovers over you, his clothed cock grinding against your throbbing core, eliciting a moan from both of you. “So goddamn beautiful. Can’t believe you’re mine.” His tip grazes your entrance through the fabric, making your toes curl in ectasy. “I’m gonna make you feel good, I swear.”
At first, he’s extremely careful, making sure to stretch you out with his fingers while you stroke him, pumping your fist to match his rhythm. “Keep that up and this’ll be over sooner than expected,” he warns, taking one of your nipples into his mouth.
It doesn’t happen like it does in the books or movies. No foreplay could’ve prepared you for the moment he enters you.
You move clumsily beneath him, your nose bumping into his forehead as he eases the first inch of his length inside.
For a moment, you’re not certain which hurts most: the dull ache in your nose or the way he’s splitting you open.
Logan freezes, his eyes wide in concern. “Shit. I’m sorry, sweetheart. Are you okay?” His hand cradles your face as he props himself up on one forearm, pushing your hair back while you adjust to his size. You laugh despite the sting, and he wipes away your tears with his thumb. “You’re laughin’?”
“I’m just happy,” you manage to get through the lump in your throat, raking your nails down his back, feeling the rough texture of the scars beneath your fingers. “I love you. Since that day at the bar, I—” you pause for a second, gasping at the sudden wave of pleasure when he twitches inside you. “I’ll always l-love you. Forever.”
As you wrap your legs around his waist and tell him you’re ready, something inside him shifts.
He feels like a madman, his eyes fixed on your face the whole time, searching for any hint of discomfort, though he occasionally glances down at the place where your bodies meet and become one, entranced by the sight of you taking him in, slick coating his length.
Your heels dig into his lower back, pulling him back to the present—back to you, with your pretty tits bouncing each time he pistols his hips, the intensity of his thrusts increasing.
“All those times you took care of me, when you—Fuck,” he groans, nipping at your jaw to regain some of his composure, his humid breath dampening your skin. Your scent drives him wild, and he reaches for your hand, intertwining his fingers with yours. “You made me feel loved when no one else did. My girl, love you so f-fucking much.”
His pace is nothing more than a voiceless testament to everything he feels but can’t find words to express.
With each minute that passes, your dripping cunt grips him tighter and tighter, his thrusts losing finesse. He needs you to come first—why does he feel like a virgin?
When you tell him you’re close, the world around him turns into a musical. You cling to the sheets, the mattress creaking noisily as he clutches the headboard, determined to find that angle that will push you over the edge.
“That’s it, sing for me,” Logan mutters from above, hypnotized by the crease forming between your brows. “Come on, let go.”
Time seems to slow down as your muscles tense and you clamp around him, your body sagging against him. His name spills from your lips in breathy whimpers, like an endless prayer, and your mouth engulfs his, tongues and teeth clashing in a fevered kiss.
Soon after that, he surrenders to the coiling tension deep within him, pulling out just in time to stroke himself once, twice, before emptying his hot load across your mound.
You gently thumb the head of his cock, coaxing out every last drop of his hot seed. He’s panting as he comes down from his high, his brain foggy and blissfully blank for a while.
Logan loses track of how many times he tells you he loves you—he does it when he pulls you into his chest, when his lips press against your temple, and when you crack that smile, the one that resembles the very purpose of his existence.
“So this is what it feels like.” His voice sounds low like a murmur near your ear, and you stir, half-asleep.
“Hmm?”
“Nothing, baby. Just thinkin’ aloud.”
You don’t have to talk about it, at least not now. Deep down, he knows that whatever thoughts run through his mind will somehow find their way into yours.
This is what life looks like. You should take a moment and feel it. You still have time.
And God, is he feeling it.
dividers by: @cafekitsune thank you!!! :)
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