#so it's rly helpful w knocking out some of the in person stuff too and like.

[kuromi-hoemie]

lmaoo not me on vacation missing my manager 😩 she's a real cup of sunshine omg.. i can Feel when we haven't had our one on one in a sec bc I'll miss talking to her and won't be as energetic bc i haven't had my fill for the week ૮ – ﻌ–ა ♡⁠ we work in different offices but it's really really nice getting to see each other in person sometimes too bc she's so so pretty and rly fun and sweet and gives incredible hugs 😔💕🥰

we always end up hanging out n talking way longer than we need to, last time she was like omg yeah let me hurry up n finish so u can do ur thing and i was like listen.. i am never rushing u i love having ur company u are always welcome to stay as long as u want i can just work right here ૮ ᴖﻌᴖა take ur time ♡⁠

[p4ngilz]

Hii babe!! Omg I’ve been obsessed with your pajama pants book on wattpad for years I can’t believe I found your tumblr, ur my favourite Connor writer.

Anyway I figured I’d send an ask!! Maybe something with a daughter of Aphrodite reader? Could you do protective connor plss, I don’t rly mind the scenario whether it’s creepy guy or like in a battle or whatever.

Thanks so much!! 🩷🩷

HEYYY HII OMG thank u blushes kicks feet!!!

the damsel in distress trope is so outdated and children of aphrodite def have sparkly pink bejeweled weapons so this being set on the battlefield is crossed out of the list. also i dont like the ending but idk ??

edit: im sorry if this didnt meet your expectations of protective connor idk i feel like it's off or boring so feel free to ask for a redo or another one w this situation 😭😭😭😭 not sure if i interpreted ur req right but lmk if i did or if u have anything to say

wc: 1.7k words

contains: erm the general creep u meet while minding ur own business idfk that's literally it

"G'morning, beautiful." Connor smiles down at you as you wake up from your rest. How many hours was that? Three? Four? A few hours as your beauty rest was better than none, so you let that worry go and sucked it up.

"Morning, Connor," you replied, your voice as sweet and smooth as ever. Your resting place today was hidden between two dumpsters behind a convenience store. At first, the idea revolted all three of you on the quest, but the events that followed that night gave you no choice, and the smell would mask your scent from any monsters. Fortunately, you had your perfume balm on you, enchanted to last for days, so smearing the stuff under your noses was a big help to battle the stench of the dumpsters.

You laid a hand on your boyfriend's shoulder. "Feeling better?" After getting into a car crash last night, his body was probably sore. He pulled a muscle in his shoulder, too. His brother Travis was knocked unconscious, so after hauling him through streets, you two had no choice but to seek shelter somewhere hidden. You only found out, when the sun rose, that you were stationed behind a convenience store. Great. Those things were like playgrounds to the sons of Hermes.

Connor stood up and stretched, testing his shoulder. "Yes! Good as new. Man, I wish mortal stores had stuff flavored with something that tastes like ambrosia."

You gazed up at him, pleased with the state he was in now. "Glad to hear," you smiled.

"Wait, they do. I love salt and vinegar chips. Oh, man, I hope Travis finds some."

You wrinkled your nose, but at the mention of food, your stomach growled. Aside from doing your best to nurse the boys back to a decent state last night, you also took first watch. That, and exhausting all your fighting skills, left you hungry.

You rummaged in your bag for a bottle of water to start your day as Connor picked up his. There you found your plastic bag of half-finished ambrosia, a flask of nectar, your first aid kit, your last change of clean clothes, your hair clip that transformed into your celestial bronze crossbow with a beaded charm around the handle, a magic blow-drier for emergencies, and—there it was.

"Travis is inside. Let's go?" Connor held out a hand and helped you up from the ground, and the two of you walked into the convenience store. You caught a glimpse of Travis, but he didn't catch sight of you back. So instead you put your water back into your bag and headed for the bathroom.

There wasn't much work to do. Just a bit of dusting off your pants and a quick wash of your face and hands to feel clean. As always, you looked perfectly put together, roughed up but in a movie star way, thanks to being a daughter of Aphrodite. It was like those scratches and stray hairs framing your face were strategically placed by a personal makeup artist.

Zipping up your jacket in a way that complimented your figure and the rest of your outfit, you nudged the bathroom door closed with your foot on the way out. Neither of the boys were inside anymore. While you scanned the aisles for them, you felt a pair of eyes on you and turned towards the counter to see a toothy man wearing a puffer vest standing in line. "You lost, sweetheart?"

You didn't like how he looked you up and down. How you felt like you were being examined under his stare. You picked it up immediately, and it made your fists tighten. You simply shook your head, then made for the exit.

Travis and Connor were munching away at breakfast sandwiches and bagels. They handed you a sandwich of your choice and a bottle of yogurt drink and you ate it without complaint, the previous occurence quickly disappearing from your mind.

"Thanks," You mumbled, and then peeked into Travis's paper bag. It had even more sandwiches and snacks inside. Quickly, he wrapped them all up and stuffed them in his bag. "Snagged some extras on my way out." He grinned, satisfied with his work.

"Still headed for the next city hall, right?" He asked.

"Mhm." You took a folded up map out of your back pocket and opened it up. "There's a bus stop right there." You nodded in the general direction of the shed, tracing a manicured finger along the map.

You had to be honest, you were only doing that to look cool. Your dyslexia slowed you down in trying to look for your current location.

You followed Travis and Connor to the waiting shed, passing the map to the former. "Let me do that, love," Connor said as you sat down and began to open your yogurt drink. He took his seat beside you and opened your drink for you, passing it back along with a kiss. The gesture made your stomach flutter. No matter how many people would throw themselves at you and try to get your attention, nothing would ever beat the way Connor made you feel with his princess treatment.

However, your mood immediately soured when the guy from inside the convenience store appeared, sitting beside you and doing a little stretch. When he was done, he turned to you and smiled.

"You're a pretty one, you know that?"

The man's voice was gravelly and he sounded like he needed a drink. You kept your eyes on whatever you could stare at on the other side of the street. "Thank you," You replied.

"You here alone?"

"No," You replied, holding back the urge to grit your teeth. You started to tap your designer boots on the concrete, impatiently awaiting the bus.

"Hm. A doll like you shouldn't be here all by yourself."

You didn't reply. Internally, you gagged and made a face and cussed him out for having the audacity.

Connor tensed up beside you; you could feel it. You huffed and checked your nails, bored. Time seemed to go exceptionally slow while you were in this situation.

When you finally forced your head to turn to see why Connor was so pissed, you saw the guy literally ogling you, a smile on his face with dark eyes that seemed to bore into every bit of you they could find.

It was disgusting. You felt disgusting. Your skin crawled.

You crossed your arms over your torso and scowled, trying to seem as unappealing as possible. Desperate times call for desperate measures, or whatever the saying was. You put a hand on Connor's knee to reassure him that you could handle it, and switched on your meanest girl voice.

"Don't you know it's rude to stare?" You shot the guy your meanest girl glare. It worked, for a second, because the smile melted off his face.

Travis came along, pulling out a pouch where he kept fake ID's and documents in case you needed them. He settled beside Connor, who had draped an arm across your shoulders, and took off his sweater.

The man glanced up at him as he passed by, relentless with his questions. "Is that your boyfriend?"

"No, this is." You moved aside to show Connor. You didn't dare break eye contact with the man, you wanted to show that you weren't afraid.

The man's frown grew deeper. "Well!" He chuckled. "Lucky guy."

Connor cleared his throat beside you. You squeezed his knee, and as curious as you were to see how he looked (because he was hot when he was pissed) you flashed the creep your fakest smile, words laced with poison.

"Your mom never told you not to talk to strangers? It's dangerous, you know." He started to force a laugh, but you cut him off, continuing. "Stop talking, because I don't have any time to waste on you, dickhead."

There was a beat of silence as he processed your words. You cracked a smile and turned back to face the opposite side of the road, satisfied with yourself. But then you heard the rustle of that stupid puffer vest.

"Hey, now, sweetheart, don't be hard. You know, if you're here on vacation, I can tell you a few good places to visit, let me tell you—"

You had just settled your eyes back on your multiple bangles and bracelets when you heard a loud smack from where the man was sitting. Connor stood between you and him and your lips parted in surprise with how quick he was. His hand was raised and the man was clutching his own, face red and showing an expression of pain. You couldn't see Connor's face, since he had his back turned to you, but you could feel how tense the hand that was on your shoulder was.

The bus finally pulled over in front of you. Travis nudged you and Connor took your hand with a stiff one. "C'mon, Y/N, let's go," he said. You eagerly stood up, keeping his hand in yours, but he didn't move. Instead, he waited for the creep to board and when he did so, he looked over his shoulder to steal one last glance at you.

You raised up your middle finger at him, but to your surprise, Connor even gave him a shove further down the aisle as the two of you followed.

Connor and Travis made sure he was seated far, far back in the bus before settling into seats with you. Connor gave you the window seat and the three of you got comfortable, though Connor was still muttering curses under his breath. You sent Travis a thumbs up gesture when he looked at the two of you.

Connor didn't relax even after the bus set off, but he did kick his bag under the seat and take your hand back in his. He planted a kiss on your temple, then your hand. "You alright?"

You nodded. "Nothing I can't handle," You assured him. "Horrible morning, but it's fine."

"Bastard was about to touch you," He muttered, lips moving against the back of your hand. "No one touches my girl if she doesn't like it."

"Mhm." You gave his hand a squeeze back, just as you always do to let him know it's okay.

[narwhalandchill]

anyway tho like. overall (SPOILER FREE!!) natlan first impressions over last week in no particular order for me bc i felt like it sooooo

Firstly: the environments are absolutely insane like. i love the vibrancy they brought into it and the striking distinct sceneries between the three main regions (tho lowkey any water region post-fontaine is... unfortunate for basically feeling like its lacking a layer w/o diving) that rly make them feel unique!! like i havent explored an insane amount but a decent bit nonetheless and i think as much as i Liked fontaine the aboveground environments there just werent that unique which like. kinda couldnt be helped given the geographic inspirations like it was good and v beautiful in its own way but more like. mondstadt premium french steampunk edition if that makes sense. whereas natlan is already striking such a distinct image for itself and thats just great

also loving all the kinds of living creatures going about everywhere like not even accounting for the saurians genshins rly come so far from the early days of barely any non-monster creature anywhere (mondstadt cavalry but no horses moment) and i love all the creatures sm 💕💕 Especially all the surprise chests theyve incorporated into tiny interactions with the animals like it just feels v fresh and immersive. theyve rly nailed the feeling of making the natural environment feel lived in its so nice

the music is also just. knocking it out of the park like ive had to pause on multiple occasions just to listen bc holy shit its good 😭😭😭 and this is also sth i think compares to fontaine bc. i mean as much as of a cringe moment the whole "wow YPC left and now fontaine music is mid its over" tantrum was (ESPECIALLY once remuria dropped like 💀💀💀 that was just gloating . A whole music based region and culture????? ya we get it) buuut. now w natlan. i do have to admit that fontaine does suffer from some of its environmental soundtracks not being as distinctly memorable as previous nations and now natlan as well . obviously fontaine has its shiver-worthy standouts but its interesting that most of those for me are bc of their use in the AQ and that association . whereas natlans been jumpscaring me left and right on the first listen lmao . anyway to be clear the point is not me hating on fontaine music for lacking impact (but never polish or quality) in some tracks just that hoyomix in natlan is delivering some insanely good stuff rn jsjskskskakdkdk

next. SAURIANS. hoyo. Hoyo . WHY DO WE HAVE TO KILL THEM????????!??? HELLO????@?

ITS SO AWFUL I FEEL LIKE A MONSTER 😭😭😭😭😭 like the small ones?????? The whelps WHIMPERING?????? id rather you punched me in the face this is horrible 😭😭 like you rly saw all the complaints about killing the cute sea creatures in fontaine being too cruel and we dont want that and went bet 💀💀💀 why do i have to wear the skin of a baby saurians mom to murder the kids its so. This is terrible why would you do thisss. id rather merk 7848 seals in Fontaine than hurt a single saurian its so badd

But uhhhhh yeah saurians are great, i rly rly love their goofy animations and how much personality each kind exudes theyre just . Lovable shaped and all i just wish they didnt. Make them THE abundant overworld enemy we need for mats 💀💀💀

In all seriousness tho gameplay wise i really like how the saurians kinda bridge the gap between the older 1.x-2.x exploration where it was really mostly just you with your characters not that many exploration mechanics to boost mobility and traversal at all and then the 3.x era and afterwards where there are all forms of assistance from things like the dendro anchors and chenyu vale mechanics and everything bc. as much as the mobility boosts are nice they kinda had the risk of taking you Out of the exploration so it just turns into a zoom around with gadgets mini game ya know???? But i think w the saurians its a lot more balanced bc. youre still playing As a specific character with their own movement and controls not just getting warped from 1 location to another as a hydro bubble and thats rly rly nice. tho i have to say the koholasaur controls are kinda ass compared to the other 2 lmao . like ig its just post fontaine problems where we Already Got flawless underwater movement so its just. not the saurian alone but the water environments themselves just being ehhh without that added... depth (haha) there??

anyway unfortunately tho on a more negative note wrt the characters im still very uhhhh. mixed on the very modern design direction taken for the playable units and the overall lack of cohesion between a lot of them like. yes natlan is its own thing with different tribes and it should stand out but something about it just takes it a bit too far for suspension of disbelief . the three 5.0 characters i think look overall good and work well enough, but then theres designs like chasca and mavuika where its just . Ehhhh.

like chasca in particular (and im sorry in advance for never letting you unsee this either) i havent been able to stop thinking about a comment i saw about how like. her makeup is WAY too detailed and intense for genshins facial models and makes her face look really weird and just kind of like a bratz doll? compared to the rest of the cast like its really this borderline "yassified" parody of a heavy makeup look that just. Doesnt look natural nor fit in with the rest of genshins characters roster and she just looks off its . Weird. like obviously ik theres a lot of v intense hate going on for her design to the point where its actively hurtful to those who like her and idt thats good at all but this is kinda why her model has such issues for me. and the mess of an outfit doesnt help with the uncanny face stuff either lmao

mavuika is more of an outfit problem honestly like. her hair is good the eyes are amazing the color scheme is great & love the sun motifs and her hair accessory but i just. a biker????? Huh? and not even a particularly good looking biker design its literally just a plain bodysuit design without the usual detailing and dangly things to make it look better from the back that theyve usually done w bodysuit type charas (think shenhe) its just this. uncomfortable looking sausage casing of a disaster garment and that zipper is just.... not it 💀💀💀 like. it doesnt look completely awful if i dont actively think about it so its like whatever but i wish she was given sth a bit different. also ffs i hope she doesnt get ACTUAL motorbike animations like the memes are funny yeah but. thats too much for me sorry thats hsr and zzz stuff . like its just. The overt modernity in natlan isnt doing it for me very much 😔😔

But oh well i hope ill warm up to the cast over time. beyond mby chasca its not like i hate-hate the look of anyone to the point where its off putting its just a Bit of a mixed feeling for now. kinich and citlali are easily my favorites from the revealed designs tho and i do actually like xilonen as well (& kachina is baby) . n like to be fair maybe its just not my style this time around - fontaine was Really catering to me personally with the designs there bc i love ruffles and lolita style inspirations and more historical fashion references and uniform-like elements for garments so a lot of designs were just hook line and sinker for me personally lmao . but ig that does make it very fucking predictable that my favorite design in natlans cast so far is Easily capitano even tho he kinda doesnt count bc i just fucking love goth historical military uniform aesthetics so much its embarrassing 😭😭😭 dont ask me how many times ive rewatched The cutscene just to watch the way his garments shift around as he moves at the beginning its...........

iiii dont think im gonna comment on the WQs yet? since its bit of a spoilery territory and im far from done w all of them but ive really liked the ones ive done so far!!! And hmm what else

OH THE REPUTATIONS. So first RIP weekly bounties and requests past max reputation for 150k weekly free mora that was such an unnecessary change hoyo what the fuck.

BUT. i have to say. Absolutely LOVE how the reputations are now distributed among the tribes and how much more lived in the entire nation feels compared to p much. ANY previous one by having multiple settlements and communities that all get their own quests and narratives like. yes its a natlan thing bc it has the 6 tribes but i RLY wish theyll keep some version of this system for snezhnaya too bc like. Especially with the story quest incorporation into the tribal chronicles chain its just??? Such an organic way to tie a playable character INTO their environment and community in a way thats been a major failing in a lot of older SQs before like its just. genius

anyway point being. just Imagine playable tonia happening except theres also some sort of morepesok reputation questline and system like??? Actually featuring the village and its people AND childes entire family fr fr in their own storyline in a voiced capacity?? Please itd be so good 😭😭😭😭

but yeah i love the tribal chronicles approach so much its like the perfect marriage between world quests and story quests and reputation like chef kiss truly. and also new bounty and request QoL is great.

Also no spoilers but man doing the first parts of the scions of the canopy quest.... yeah i was in fucking tears . If you know you know.

aaaand i think thats it for now ??? Overall been having a great time, not pulling for anyone in 5.0 on my main, maybe kinich on my alt but cant guarantee him there . i think ill get xilonen and then mavuika for sure bc obvious archon (unless shes an on fielder HSJSKSOEKDIEI) but the big lookout is still chioris rerun lmao. xilonen and her at the same time would be ideal thanks xx

hope its been fun for yall too o777

[choptop-sawyer]

Hi again 😎💫 im here to dig at ur brain again bcs i. M. Aaa sorry i just love ur stuff but. I have this kinda rly specific storyline type hc area and I'd love to hear any hcs you might get from it if its at all jr thing. But um I keep sometimes thinking back to the idea of kinda, vaguely growing up in the same area as the Sawyers, being childhood friends (and being stupid 2gether, running arount the countryside, ditching school & playing in corn fields) -

But then having to leave in your late teens to school / whatever (I mean 😎 my sappy ass also thinks abt mutual pining w Bobby but you know...... nearly unrelated.......)

Then, later on (Bobbys now Chop Top, Nubbins is..... dead I guess but also >:( maybe not, the family is up to being a mess etc) returning to town to take a break from work or whatever. N meeting up w the family again, i mean, oblivious to the bullshit they get up to but.... yk

This is a bit rambly i should probs have waited to sleep but I can't get the thought of returning to the Sawyer door wearing Bobbys tie dye sweatshirt that hr borrowed u years ago and all the impact of being a former family member bc u were also kind of an outsider or whatever but also the drama of leaving so uwu sksjd

This got so long. All i wanted to ask is: sawyer family headcanons for a childhood friend returning to town after being away for years. Rip.

THANK YOU FOR SENDING THIS god I love the image too of just standing in the doorway,, you're not home, you've changed a little bit, but you still fit into some of the old aspects you know so well they fit you and cover you.

Actually this is great because that fic that I swear exists has pretty much the same premise but!!! I can make this one less tragic than that one. 😎

(This is mostly Chop Top n you centric please don't mind)

Also this timeline is all fucky. I think that as soon as Chop came home from Vietnam the Sawyers had basically uprooted themselves and were living in North Texas because of the... Hardesty incident. But like can we pretend that that never happened they r still there in Newt? Just for this. (Hope you like it!)

Chop Top's Childhood Friend Returns

You don't think you would have turned out the way you did without the Sawyers.

They were the main element of your childhood, a mystery that you had to be a part of. A mystery, because they were closed off. Mistrustful. The sickness of small towns carried to the extreme, because they were mostly alone. The loneliness made them more miserable, the misery made them more isolated. A cycle, a legacy.

So it was a a miracle that you were even allowed to be apart of some of it, but you attribute that miracle to Bobby.

He seemed to think you were as much of mystery as what you thought the Sawyers were. Two kids looking through a small window into another world. But he liked that. He liked that you were something different, something new. From beyond that small world of loneliness that lived in the house.

You learned quickly that he had a desire for anything beyond that world. So he'd invite you out with him, when you were kids, to run free in the tall grass, when you got older, to drive with him to places unknown. He had a knack for finding these odd places, and he always brought you along with the music cranked up loud on the radio.

Bobby told you many times that he wanted to see the world. He had this lust for life that went beyond the restlessness of the young. He also said that he wanted to bring you along with him when he saw the world. You didn't ever mention how that always made your heart skip a beat when he said that.

Maybe you should have. But the past is the past and you can't change that.

You knew the other Sawyers too, but Bobby tended to avoid them sometimes. But occasionally, you got to hang out with them.

Nubbins was an enigma. You didn't think Nubbins was his real name. But that's the only one you heard from him, but the name situation was the least confusing thing. He was the most open person you knew. And yet you couldn't understand him, and decided at some point that you wouldn't ever. But he was fun. His energy was infectious, if he was filled with joy, you couldn't help but laugh with him too. That was Nubbins, so absent of any purposeful deceit that he was almost a mirror, you saw yourself around him, sometimes it was uncomfortable, but other times it was fun.

Bubba was the opposite. He seemed to be legitimately wary of you. Bobby once told you that Bubba didn't like to leave the house, ever. He stayed and did the chores. You wondered if he minded, being stuck with all the chores but Bobby said he didn't. It was comforting for him. Always having something set to do. You only saw him once. Nubbins had made him tag along when he needed him to hang some things from a tree. Bones from indeterminate animals, a clock with a nail through it. You don't think Nubbins actually needed Bubba to reach the branches (he climbed pretty well) but he just wanted his little brother to see his work. Bubba didn't make eye contact with you the entire time. He was wholly focused on his task of helping Nubbins. But he was gentle when he helped his brother, careful, and for that you liked him.

Drayton was... well. He was the one Bobby argued with the most. He was his brother, but with how much age between the two, it was almost hard to believe sometimes. Drayton was the one that everybody in Newt knew the most. People liked him well enough, but they said he was odd behind his back. He knew that. You don't think he trusted anything outside the insular world he and his family had existed in for years, and was at odds with Bobby because he didn't get why Bobby wanted anything to do with the world outside.

Oftentimes you would see Bobby after he and Drayton got into it. He'd be fuming, but he'd smile when he saw you. You'd leave with him whenever he came to you. These adventures were the most fun you had when you were there.

The other times you'd go off were when he'd convince you to skip school. Bobby never went himself. He didn't get the idea of all those kids sitting in classrooms for hours, doing nothing but writing and listening. Why do that when you can find things out for yourself? Get into some trouble? In his mind, he was saving you from a very boring thing.

You two knew the area around Newt well. The fields and the flat expanses were the best kind of playground. Your dreams were still set in them. A kind of sunshine filled melancholy.

Bobby told you things in the grass. His dreams yes, but his own thoughts. On music, on late night radio, on movies, on you. He perhaps thought of you as wonderful as voices on the radio, stars on the screen. He never told you that though. But your name was never far from his mouth when Bobby talked about the things he loved.

You and him loved each other as much as two kids who didn't know how to could. He was always on your mind now, with not much tangible objects to remember him with. A photograph taken by Nubbins, your faces blurred because you were laughing. A button, the pin on the back bent. A sweatshirt, which he tie dyed himself, and gave to you one night. The colors were faded. You never did get to return it.

The years away did nothing to lessen thoughts of him. No, they just blurred all together now, and the stream of the sunshine filled melancholy was almost endless. You needed a break. There was only one place you could think of that could help you with that.

So you came back. All things led back to this place eventually. Newt was dying, or dead. Didn't you see somewhere that when a ship went down, it took everything with it? You didn't want to stay for long. But you had to see all of them, you had to know that they were all not these strange figures you had dreamt up.

You went right to the house. You'd never actually been allowed inside, Bobby just always said something along the lines of 'Grandma and Grandpa are napping upstairs' or 'there's a mess' (never mind that he could care less usually about messes.) But you figured he had had a good reason. Maybe he was embarrassed.

When you knocked on the door, your heart was pounding. And that was all. Nothing happened, no indication that anyone was there. You waited, the sweatshirt was too hot but you didn't want to take it off.

Maybe you should come back another time. You were just about to turn around and leave when the door burst open, almost whacking you in the face. And there (you couldn't believe your eyes you couldn't this was a dream) he was.

Bobby had a hammer raised over his head, grinning, he was poised to swing it down, but then he saw you and he felt as if he was in a dream too.

It's been so long. He thought he made you up, a dream to carry him through misery, and you looked the part, even as you stood before him on the doorway. The light of the setting sun shone behind you, heat waves shimmered in the dusk, and you... you.

Facing each other, you stood, just staring. Over head the sky grew colorful, in the fields the grass whispered in the wind. Nothing had changed. Everything had changed. Bobby dropped the hammer and grabbed for your face, and he held it, fingers digging in so tight it hurt.

"H-hey you." He said, and fell to his knees, releasing your face. You numbly touched the marks his fingers left. Bobby still looked like a man who had seen a ghost.

You called his name, and his eyes looked lost, like he hadn't heard it in a long time. He looked up at you, and you could really get a good look at him. His face was leaner, he looked sickly and wiry, but his eyes were just as you remembered. You sank down to the porch to sit with him.

"Fuck... FUCK I didn't... I- I thought ya'd forgotten all about me... uh.. uhm. Fuck! I mean, r-really! Turnin' up out of the blue like you're some kinda... ghost or whatever... WHOA man... like, ya here to return m-my, my sweatshirt? You're wearin' it, you can keep it! You look better in it anyway... heh, fuck." He rambled on and on, hands tensing and twitching as if they were moving to touch you again, just to reaffirm your existence. Did he know how glad you were to see him? Did he know that you hadn't felt right for the longest time being away?

You forgot all about the sweatshirt, the hammer he had raised with a sadistic grin. You reached out and held one of his twitching hands, and he stilled and stopped talking. There was a peace now.

It didn't seem possible for your heart to feel this full. But it was. And by god, if this wasn't the best decision you made in your life to visit your old hometown, if only just for this moment.

Bobby stood, with your hand still in his, pulling you up. He smiled at you, and you knew you still loved him, and in your deepest heart, you knew he loved you too.

But this time around, maybe you and him could love each other right.

[faerynova]

Dsmp fic recs p pls? 🥺🤲

oh god ok i guess im going back to my habit of keeping a word doc of fics so that i can find them again-- (yes i know bookmarks exist but i need more concise lists and better organization shut up)

anyway literally every single one of these fics is either physical or emotional pain so if youre here for fluff you are in the WRONG place good sir’am

IMMEDIATE RECS OFF THE TOP OF MY HEAD PLEASE READ THESE IM BEGGING:

The Villain Gets An Elegy (New Shoes) [oneshot] --- tubbo and quackity and the aftermath of schlatt abusing them. This Made Me Feel Everything At Once. (it would normally get a few points knocked off for using the name alex instead of quackity, but i can forgive it for the sheer QUALITY of the writing)

i am what survives if it’s slain [oneshot] --- exploring jack manifold going to hell and the aftermath of him coming back wrong and HOLY SHIT its so good love me some unhinged jack

blood in the water (we’ll never get free) [wip] --- punz doesnt show up after the disc confrontation, and dream kills tubbo. tommy is thrown in prison and damn thats some good tommy whump right there

snapshots in lavender [wip] --- technoblade is caught in a glitch during the potato wars and loses his memories. sbi try to bring him back to being a functioning person but technoblade is having a rough time of it. (im not done reading this one yet but im like 30k in and its REALLY GOOD)

MORE UNDER THE CUT BECAUSE I DIDNT WANT THIS TO GET TOO LONG

KARLNAPITY STUFF:

tick tock [oneshot] --- every time karl tries to tell his fiances that he time travels, his future self shows up to stop him because It Will Go Bad. top tier time looping.

a matter of politeness [oneshot] --- karl is too polite to say hes lost his memory, so he just pretends. (written by the same person that did tick tock)

drowning your demons in yesterday’s tears [wip] --- quackity struggling with trauma from schlatt and he’s been visiting schlatt’s ghost and just is in general having a really bad and confusing time

these are the lies [oneshot] --- karl gets a bit lost at the masquerade and ends up going home with james

Growing Pains [wip] --- the in between is Angry and karl mcfucking dies in front of quackity and sapnap. unsure of where exactly its going but i like the writing so far

tuck me in your covers, bring the colour back into my face [oneshot] --- quackitys got trauma from schlatt but his fiances are there to help

The Things We Lost [wip] --- quackitys got trauma from schlatt and this time its his fiances who accidentally triggered him

-

SOME GENERAL WHUMP ONESHOTS:

spider lily --- wilbur gets revived (not a villain) and hes having a bad time with, yknow, having a body again.

i wanna hear it’s alright [oneshot collection] --- variety philza whump oneshots

About Phantom Pains of Dying [oneshot collection] --- variety technoblade whump oneshots

on i go (move to move) --- technoblade has a bad time w chronic pain and respawning + SBI family

-

AND SOME IN-PROGRESS STUFF THAT IM RLY ENJOYING SO FAR:

Lemme get back to you on that --- ranboo has a really bad day and flips out and tubbo has his hands full with a panicking kid and a panicking husband

Freedom? --- basically dream is broken out of prison and techno and phil are taking care of him and listen i just like seeing characters get fucked. quackity torturing dream Broke him

crete --- tommy grows wings in exile and its the worst experience of his life. i have beef with the anatomy of the wings in stuff like this but i CANNOT deny the incredible whump content

[mikyouknow]

Please! Rewatch the quiz! I need something to remind me that that actually happened.

I still vividly remember that day. Going out on a chill bike ride with my two best friends for the first time in months. Sitting in the cool grass. Having a picknick. Not too hot out, nice weather. AND THEN I GET HOME TO THE ABSOLUTEL SHITSHOW THAT HAPPENED THAT DAY! Because what the HELL even was that, I still haven't processed anything. My mind keeps erasing that memory until some days the it just hits me square in the face and knocks me out 😀

So yeah! I would love it if you talked more about it, might help to cope a bit xD

Okay anon you motivated me, you were my Final push, I’m Doing it ! 🗣

Also I love that story tho you really have a Vivid memory connected to this whole thing and I’m living for it 😂 you were just having a nice day and then Boom, all this mess 💀

But aight so I’m Watching it rn and will be taking notes Live as I watch Here we go:

My first thoughts is, when Dream decides to do the quiz, he seems so like, confident? And then as soon as he reads the description, his voice falters at ‘and now things are changing’ and I’m Dead 💀 his confidence from two seconds prior in that moment goes like 📉 then cue flustered laugh lmao

“Do you ever catch yourself staring at your bff?” Dream’s flustered laugh and being all like “these questions are gonna be so weird” uhhhhh dude what are you expecting you’re taking a are you in love with your best friend quiz 💀

HES SO DEFENSIVE ON THIS ONE LIKE- he keeps wanting to make excuses aww drema aww 😭 it’s okay !! George is pretty we Understand you staring king 😌

Like legit that’s the first question and he’s already so flustered and- MY GOD GEORGE HASNT SAID A THING I JUST REALIZED WAIT HOLD ON I NEED TO GO BACK-

Two scoffs. That’s it 🧍‍♀️

GEORGE JSJWNSOWNEEJEN HES NOT SAYING ANYTHING IM DYING WHAT

Even when Dream first goes ‘aight imma take the am I in love w my best friend test’ George is SILENT 💀

Listen- listen, I’m having a moment over this cause I don’t remember him being silent from the start I thought it was like a slow descent into him just going silent eventually, BUT NO he’s just Silent from the moment the quiz is brought up 💀 but gives like a slight scoff when Dream’s voice wavered at “changing” like he’s very much Listening, just being So silent.

I just can’t wrap my head around how he doesn’t answer any of Dream’s comments, Dream keeps being like ‘right? Like that’s normal, right? Like that’s not weird. Right?’ And George is just SILENT 💀

“Do you get jealous if he or she has a bf or gf” LMAO THIS QUESTION MY BELOVED

His answer is so weird I will die on this hill.

ALSO GEORGE S P E A K S for the first time in the quiz 😭🗣 but not much, he says ‘but’, cause, yk, they both know he do get jealous so.

Which, again. Weird as hell. Imma say it, I’ve never felt jealous of my best friend getting a partner like what ???? W h a t

But ofc when they’re so clingy on each other, like a partner would take the others place because they pretty much have each other in that spot already, so it makes sense huh

And that’s not platonic btw I wanna make that clear LMAO

I think the points of which George laughs are interesting. And there’s something interesting to his laugh too. I don’t see his face lighting up with it, if that makes sense. It’s like a, I wouldn’t say ‘nervous’ laugh but, I struggle to find a better word for it 🤔

AYO MY MANS DREAM SAYS I DONT KNOW TO IF HE GETS BUTTERFLIES FROM GEORGE I- 💀

THATS NOT AN I DONT KNOW QUESTION KING

EITHER YOU DO OR YOU DONT AND YOU KNOW IF YOU DO OR DONT LIKE W H A T

I have to sit with this one for a second like . What ? 🧍‍♀️

Butterflies.

I’ve never. In my life. Like.

That’s not- you can’t say you don’t know- THAT MEANS LIKE-

Dear lord.

Aight I’m moving on (not actually imma be awake thinking about this later. Not by choice, absolutely not. This just won’t leave my brain unfortunately.)

Hang on. George says something here when Dream says ‘I have no idea’ but I can’t tell what he’s saying ? Like he mumbles something whilst Dream starts talking at the same time and I can’t make it out and I wanna know what he says 💀🗣

I Think he says ‘what do you mean you have no idea?’ Which like, YEAH, you Should question him on that king 🧍‍♀️ but it’s interesting how quiet he is, like he barely pushes the question, and this is like the second ?? Time he’s spoken so far. 🧍‍♀️

Also Listen to how flustered Dream sounds my god💀

This quiz never should’ve happened what’s Wrong with him like is he this blind ?? Did he Really think taking this quiz was gonna end well ?? 💀

“TecHniCally🥴”

“My future is your future”

I feel like we’ve talked abt these LMAO such Romantic phrasing my god

Again him going ‘right?’ And George is Dead Silent 💀

It’s interesting, like I’ve reached the ‘dreams’ question now, and it’s hitting now and throughout this quiz how, Dream is Loudly deflective, but George is silently deflective. If that makes sense? Like he’s choosing not to speak so his words can’t be thrown back at him cause he Knows if he speaks it’ll be obvious. Whilst Dream over explains and fucks himself over p much lmao. They’re both just a mess around this subject 💀

“How would You be in my dream” is such a funny sentence from George LMAO he’s so defensive 💀 like even I have had dreams abt Dream, like you’re his Best Friend, ofc you have dreams abt him my guy 💀 deflecting it is so weird. So Weird

“I’ve never hugged you” Sad hours 😔

It’s interesting here. Cause they speak abt the whole ‘do you go out of your way for this person’ and Dream is stuck on if he should say ‘more than anyone else I know’ or not. Which, there’s ofc observations to be had here as well.

But ! What I found interesting here was how George goes onto say ‘you made me pay you’ when Dream says he edited his video for him. And how George keeps the ‘lie’ going for a very short bit before laughing slightly, by god he sounds so.. different? Like when he usually makes little lies to troll or stuff like that, he’s much more extra and keeps the bit going and- idk how to explain it but the tone of his voice is usually way different. Here he seems to, idk, struggle to keep that up. His laugh is also just like, somewhat toneless?

LMAO The MOMENT Dream got the question ‘what do you think abt their laugh’ George’s laugh Stops. 💀

“Do you ever think abt what it would be like to Kiss your best friend?”

THE SILENCE

Also,

how Dream read ‘kiss’ 🤝 how Dream read ‘changing’

Some words hit this man different huh LMAO

“Why did that take you so long” on the kiss question, CALL HIM OUT GEORGE 🗣

HRKEJEKEEJEKJEEIEJ HOW ARE THOSE- SORRY WHAT DREAM ??

“HOW ARE THOSE THE ONLY OPTIONS” ???

God, for real, I wish Dream would get to sit down with someone one day who just Listened to him speak and allowed him to slip up and just sound so in love with George like give himself away simply because nobody is saying how weird he’s-

Hold on.

Wait. A minute.

George.

George is doing that LMAOOOO

Him sitting there silently and not responding to all his small questions abt what he Should answer and such, he’s so smart🧍‍♀️

AIGHT MOVING ON

George’s laugh keeps sounding very, like, strange😅

Anyways the way Dream Had to have a ‘yes’ answer to the kiss one will forever keep me up at night. Now along with the butterflies one🧍‍♀️

I rly wonder what options it is Dream is looking for when he says ‘none of these options’ so often. What is it you wanna say king ?

WHY IS THE BUTTERFLIES QUESTION TWICE AND WHY IS HIS ANSWER NOW DIFFERENT LMAO - drema it’s okay it’s Safe Space 🗣 I feel like he probably saw chat responding to his first answer and realized ‘oop, that’s not platonic’ and changed his answer LMAO 💀 he’s- Ahh hard to find the right words for my Thoughts here, but he’s doing that thing where he looks for others what is ‘normal’ instead of seeing what he feels, cause what He feels is, uh, well we all know what results he got at the end there,,

I mean the kiss question is all u need really. The butterflies one puts icing on the whole cake.

“Do you compare this person to others you’ve dated? Noo...” AIGHT AND THERE WE HAVE THE CHERRY ON TOP OF THE WHOLE THING

This was the one of the Most sus ones imo from when I first watched it. It had my head spin, head in hands for Days.

What do you MEAN you compare him to others you’ve dated? Why does he tell George to shut up, why do they both Know there’s a story there- I have so many questions on this and- this isn’t platonic 💀😭 AT ALL - and there’s no excuse or explanations for this one, they just Move On 💀

The Speed at which they move on 💀

And then George goes So silent 🧍‍♀️

Dream is cruising through the questions and George is so silent now. He was Stunned into silence from that shut up LMAO

I like how Dream picked ‘absolutely’ on being able to tell George everything :’)

So.

Why does George not say anything on the ‘do you think your best friend is in love with you’ question? No joke, no protest, no- no nothing?

That leaves us to fill in the blanks king, just saying🧍‍♀️

Why does Dream sound sarcastic when he says it’s a tough question LMAO

“I have no idea” aight good answer ig LMAO let’s Pretend

George’s silence is for real very sus there. Very. 🥴

Dream putting ‘no’ on thinking he’s in love, is Very funny and shows just how blind he is to himself.

He rly put ‘I don’t know’ for the butterflies one and found the nearest ‘yes’ option for the kiss one and then still put ‘no’ at the end - he’s a lost cause and owns no mirrors I see how it is. (/j btw lmao I have hope in drema ofc, he too can become more self aware one day<3)

“You are a little in love with your best friend” cue both of them laughing in just the weirdest ways. George just sounds absolutely toneless like, I don’t think he’s even smiling with that laugh, gaze absolutely dazed at what he’s being witness to, not even knowing what to do with himself in that moment. And Dream’s laugh is also just, weird?

“You don’t wanna ruin it, Dream.” Followed by Dream’s immediate, “oh what? It says-“ like immediately moving on lmao 💀 that “oh what?” Sounded like “oh what’s that there oh that’s rly weird wow let’s move on from what you just said ahem wow really weird thing over there” LMAO

“There’s a two percent chance there” LMAO

OH NO THE SILENCE WHAT

I THOUGHT I ACCIDENTALLY PAUSED THE VIDEO BUT THE SILENCE IS SO LONG AND SO LOUD

Then Dream going onto pretending like he’s gonna do another test As If he’s not been planning his escape excuse from the very moment he got those test results LMAO

And the silent pauses are taking me out 💀

‘I think we’re done’ HOW COULD HE LEAVE AT THAT POINT 💀💀💀

“COOL PODCAST” IM DEAD ON THE FLOOR

“WHY ARE YOU SO NOSY” DREAM I- WHY U SO DEFENSIVE GEORGE ASKING WHERE YOU’RE GOING IS A NORMAL THING TO ASK 💀YOU’RE THE ONE WHO’S SUDDENLY LEAVING

NOT DREAM AWKWARDLY SINGING THE WIZARD OF OZ-

HE SOUNDS SO WEIRD-

The tone of his voice is so off my guy is so ready to leave and sit and stare at a wall whilst looping heatwaves for five hours 💀

:((((( drema my beloved :((((( it’s okay to be in love !!

Not him leaving- he full on ignored George’s ‘where are you going?’

He’s not going anywhere istg the moment he left that discord he put his head in his hands and just Stared 💀

Poor George 🥺

[kiss4kazu]

Hi! could I request some headcanons for what kissing Ashe and Dimitri (Felix too if thats not too much if not its fine) would be like for the first time?

☆ first time kisses with ashe, dimitri, felix 

↳ ashe babie boy 

although ashe is really innocent and pure i think he’s easily one of the most romantic in blue lions and would really go above and beyond always for the person he loves. 

i know a lot of people probably see ashe as someone being too reluctant and nervous to actually ever make a move first but i think if he really liked someone, he’d be extremely obvious about it, blushing like crazy, a stuttering mess, etc and after enough pep talks from sylvain he’d finally make a move to ask u out on a date and it would be an absolute wreck.

would literally put together something so fckin cheesy n corny but in the most adorably ashe way that it makes you want to punch him from being so precious

like a cute picnic or something by a lake and he’d make cute little cakes with some help from annette and it would just be so pure. 

he’d rehearse how he’s going to confess in his head like a million times but when the moment actually comes it ends up just being a jumbled up mess filled with “ums” and he’d try to stick to the script him and sylvain came up with and get out a “y-you’re r-really… u-uh… p-pretty..” but then he’d fuck it all up by saying something weird n dorky like “a-and you s-smell really nice… w-wait that’s weird i’m sorry-” and you’d just hold back ur laughter, ur heart swelling with so so much affection for him. 

ofc he’d ask for permission to kiss you, cheeks crimson and his eyes looking up at yours like tht one starry eyed emoji. you’d give him a vocal response, since he rly needs that reassurance. no stutters just “of course ashe” and he’d smile so so big and then just swoop down totally uncoordinated. 

would probs miss your lips and have to readjust. 

kissing ashe for the first time would be … messy. he’s not experienced at all, and doesn’t know what to do with his hands and he’d honestly be a dead fish for a good few moments. but as you ease him more into the kiss, he’d loosen up a bit, tilt his head and just stop overthinking. his lips would be really warm and would taste so sweet from the cake and he’d smile so hard into the kiss that your teeth end up bumping into each other and you’d pull away laughing

ashe kisses are the best honestly the butterflies fireworks the whole shebang yknow. 

as he gets more confident he’d probably try out a few things he’s seen in books like slipping his tongue in and would be completely taken aback by just how nice it feels. would probably whine into the kiss, cradle your face in his hands, and once you guys pull apart for some air he’d just breathe heavily against your lips with the dopiest smile on his face :( <3 

he’d be rly slap happy after kissing you for the first time and would probably tackle u onto the picnic blanket laughing from happiness kissing your face everywhere and showering you in compliments, shoving his face into ur neck and just breathing in ur scent. 

he’s very clingy ok. 

↳ dimi !!

whew. ok so we’re gonna do academy phase dimi since feral dimi is uh… probs not sfw & violent skjdfjslkjfd  

academy phase dimi knows NOTHING about kissing n he has 0 experience so it takes him forever n a day to finally get the balls to kiss u and when he does … whew. 

i can imagine kissing dimi to be during like , a deep convo or something late at night, when he’s having trouble sleeping or something and ur just running ur fingers through his hair, listening to him as he vents and admiring the sound of his voice bc he’s always more talkative at the dead of night when he’s sleep deprived. 

he’d just look at u so so lovingly and it would be suffocating and ur just staring at his lips but u know ur probs way in over ur head bc uh he’s the future king of faerghus 

but then he’d ask for permission too like ashe tbh bc he’s just polite like tht and has too good mannerisms 

plus he cares a lot about your comfort and would never want to make u feel unsafe or uncomfy especially by his doing

and you would nod with quickness n he’d waste not a second to connect ur lips 

kissing dimi is like a trance tbh, type of kiss that feels like something in u is short-circuiting 

literally the type of kiss that makes ur knees buckle u know the ones. 

he’s a rly rly good kisser n it makes no sense bc he’s literally never kissed anyone before in his life n it kind of makes u mad bc why is he perfect 

a rly rly passionate kisser and he can be kind of rougher than he intends to bc he’s not good with fragile things 

clearly v dominant in the kiss, one hand with an iron grip on ur hip the other tangled up behind ur neck, gripping ur hair. after a while gets reluctant and starts to overthink things and pulls away apologizing for being too rough

you’d probs have to reassure him a million times tht its okay dimi ur not hurting me!! 

he’s rly touch starved tbh so he always tends to take pecks into full-blown makeout sessions or when he intends to just kiss ur forehead he ends up kissing ur cheeks too, ur jaw, down ur neck just riling himself up tbh and then he finally  looks up at u with his eyes all dark n ur just like … here we go

did i mention he groans a lot during kisses bc he does 

dimi’s other sides shining through when his emotions overwhelm him is just .. dimitri 101. 

he’s rough, seemingly an expert at this shit, his tongue shoving past your lips and completely taking u off guard. he’d literally kiss you so hard your head would spin and he’d do it all with a blush on his face bc he’s still a shy babie.  as soon as the moment is over he’s back to stuttering n being all awkward boyish prince. 

he’s also the type to shower u in compliments between kisses.

kisses lips “you’re so gorgeous” smooches neck “so amazing” kisses jaw “goddess i love you” 

im scream crying

↳ felix too bc WHY NOT ! i love him 

listen. 

this little fucker kisses the life out of people u heard it here first folks. 

he’s 100% a heat of the moment type of kisser. it could go two ways tbh. like if you got hurt or something on his behalf he’d scream at you with glossy eyes for a good 5 minutes and then just stare at you all >:( and then he’d just grab you and  kiss the fuck out of you.

probably the most passionate kisser out of the three, he kisses to the point where u can’t feel ur toes and stuff he’d just completely indulge without any fucks given bc he almost lost you and he’s not good with explaining his emotions so hopefully this helps you understand. 

the other way i can see a first kiss going down with felix is more.. vulnerable, despite his hard exterior. he is rough and mean but it’s not bc he’s genuinely a bad person he just has walls built up so high tht its impossible for anyone to rly climb over 

to get a kiss from lix, u definitely have to have climbed over tht wall of his, or just fly a wrecking ball through it n send it crumbling to the ground

you’re literally the only exception, the only person who can rly get through to him 

he’d probably turn to you for comfort a lot, when dimitri agitates him with memories of glenn or his dad says something that ticks him off and he wants to punch something he’d just go to you instead, knock on ur door and just waltz in like he owns the place, sitting down on ur bed and u would know he wants cuddles bc this is how felix communicates 

if he had to actually say “i want cuddles” out loud he’d probably shoot himself in the foot with an arrow so he’s glad u understand, u always understand him just by looking at him n it’s reassuring bc he’s never been good with words.

its kind of cringe to him that he likes being held but shocker he likes being held 

he also rly rly likes it when u play with his hair he’s like a cat he will literally start nuzzling into you, so warm and pliant to your touch

ok im getting distracted back to the kissing shit

felix would probably just be rly overwhelmed with emotions n he doesn’t rly know how to tell u “i like u” so he just says “im going to kiss you.” like a literal statement n then he does it n ur just like o-o bc wtf. 

if ur not responsive at first he’d just pull away after a while and wouldn’t meet eyes with u and be all blushy. 

would let out a tch like the little shit that he is, and u have to turn his face so he’s properly looking at u again and meeting eyes with u 

he looks so vulnerable and stupidly gorgeous so u kiss him this time so he knows the feeling is mutual and it’d take him a min to really gather whats happening but once he does he’d literally. suck. the. life. out. of. your. face. period. 

felix kisses r rough n messy n just completely self-indulgent and he groans shamelessly when u pull his hair tie out from his bun and tug at his hair yes i have a thing for felix’s hair leave me alone.

gives 0 fucks would literally shove his tongue down your throat pull you flush against him and he always calls sylvain insatiable but rly its this fucker who’s insatiable he is literally eating your face. 

you’d have to pull him away from you and he’d just pant so hard against your lips and look at you like he wants to devour you and its kind of overwhelming bc he’s fucking hot !!!!! 

would shove his face into ur neck and mumble out an “i like you”  and u would tease him n be like “what did you say i cant hear u?” and he’d elbow u in the ribs  and groan into ur neck and u would laugh n kiss his head, telling him u like him too

at tht he’d lift his head up, his hair falling over his amber eyes and u would just push the strands away from his face and kiss him softly one last time before going back 2 ur conversation about punching sylvain’s face or sumn

anyway i love felix thanks 4 coming to my ted talk. 

requests are open! <3

- vivi ★

[angeltrapz]

hhmmmmvnfj asks abt Lawrence? umm in a selfship way: what’s ur favorite gift he’s gotten u? — in a character analysis way, bcuz I’ve posted a lil abt it n u mentioned it in DMs too: if William had survived, bc Lawrence was handling new disciples at that time (like Brad n Ryan), how do u think Lawrence n William would’ve interacted? (esp bc we know William was at least vaguely aware of who Lawrence was pre-trap bc of their connections to John)

dfhskj thank u!!! finally getting 2 this

okay fr the selfship part: mentioned it a little bit when replying 2 the other ask u sent, but it’s a worry stone made out of rhodonite (which looks a lil like this), bc he knows how interested I am in gems + rocks n stuff like that but also bc he wanted me to have smth to fidget with in case I forgot my lil lanyard of rolling beads when we went somewhere! it’s smth I just run my thumb along bc it’s smooth n soft n fits perfectly in the palm of my hand. a lot of times if I’m in an uncomfortable situation I can’t get out of, having that w me helps a lot bc it’s grounding n it reminds me of him 💞💞

fr the character analysis part: KJSKFS YEAH I love getting 2 talk abt that bc I actually think abt it quite a bit. as u said, William and Lawrence have always been vaguely aware of each other on account of being connected thru their interactions w John, the doctor who he felt wasn’t kind/sympathetic enough n the insurance agent who denied his (EXTREMELY experimental, mind u) foreign treatment request. I’m not sure that they ever interacted face-to-face PRIOR to John’s death, but after William survives his test it’s just kinda like... who else does he have 2 talk to that might be able to understand even the tiniest bit what he went thru? he loves Pamela to pieces, of course he does, she’s his only family - but she didn’t see what he’d had to do, doesn’t rly KNOW like Lawrence would.

but I still think he’d absolutely be Cautious, bc even w the desire to be understood n maybe even have someone he could confide in, William knows now that Lawrence has been helping John for quite some time - as we see in 3D and as u said, Lawrence is the one handling new disciples, something that only John ever did; Amanda didn’t have her own apprentices, n Hoffman sure as hell didn’t either. that, n William doesn’t know how much involvement, if any, Lawrence had w his own test - that’s smth that wld haunt him a lil, I think. it’s hard to be comfortable around a person who is not only directly involved w the person who felt it necessary to put u in a trap, but who Also may have been the one to put fucking explosive bracelets/anklets n tattoos on u + SEWN A KEY inside of u, which is INCREDIBLY violating of his bodily autonomy. that could warrant a whole discussion of its own tbh.

but. Lawrence is the closest John ever got 2 having a TRUE successor (which I have conflicting feelings on; my reading of Lawrence in SAW 2004 was not someone who wld have joined up w someone who caused him so much pain, but fr the sake of exploring this, I think tht after going thru something as horribly traumatizing and irreversibly changing as he did, he sought that life of control n routine that he felt he had prior to his game, and well, John could certainly provide that,,,) n William would likely know this. Amanda’s dead, Logan is off doing who knows what n living his life, Hoffman is only doing it out of a weird sense of obligation?, and Jill isn’t rly a disciple, just some1 who’s been dragged into it too. (I think William n Jill actually would’ve gotten along tbh,, it’s a different thing entirely whether William would WANT to interact w her.)

I think Lawrence wld want to be able to reassure William that he had no hand in what happened to him (I don’t even know if Lawrence is the one who fitted the bracelets/did the key?), but he like. wouldn’t even know where 2 begin bc how can he explain that in a way that William could ever rely on? how could he ever convince William that he truly wasn’t responsible when all the other man wld have 2 do is look at all of th ppl he assisted John in securing/operating on? Hoffman was the one who put William in his trap, but Lawrence doesn’t know he’ll ever b able 2 prove that in a way William can believe. n I don’t think he’d expect William to believe him, not at all, but I think Lawrence at that point truly doesn’t have anyone - he and Alison are divorced and she has Diana, Adam isn’t around obviously, John + Amanda are gone, Hoffman doesn’t know he exists, so who does he have? I think he longs fr that sort of connection, even if it Is forged thru smth as terrible as what they were both individually put thru by John - they have tht common ground of being involved in his diagnosis + the way he responded to them (petty fucking grievances... kramer I will literally knock yr teeth in u fucker) n being ppl he considered partially responsible fr his downfall in a way (Lawrence wasn’t “kind enough,” William said no to a highly expensive and experimental international treatment that they weren’t even sure wld WORK). and like, not necessarily 2 the same extent, but they were both physically altered by what they went thru. Lawrence is missing his foot. William has scars + tattoos that he could get covered up, sure, but the experience isn’t going away. the scar on his side where the key was hidden is never going away. Lawrence’s prosthetic is functioning but the fact that he cut his fucking foot off isn’t going away. n that’s not even TOUCHING the lasting mental effects.

so I think William wld be feeling rly lost. he just doesn’t know what to do. he doesn’t know if he can even go back to the life he led b4 (if he does, it’s not for a very long time) n he has a hard time looking Pamela in the eye bc he feels personally responsible fr her having been there too + bc of what he’d been made to do to so many ppl. he feels alone, much more than he ever has before, n that’s saying smth bc his personal life was already extremely solitary bc he felt it was safer for him + his career. no one could possibly understand what he went thru, bc nobody saw it. nobody saw the way he tried so hard to keep every1 alive, the way he tried to help the people he worked with + CARED FOR even if he had 2 put himself thru pain to do it (holding onto those pulleys until his shoulders were almost DISLOCATED fr Addy n Allen, burning himself w the steam so Debbie could get thru the maze, the entirety of the shotgun carousel). Tara + Brent didn’t see him sacrifice himself fr his coworkers, n neither did Pamela. nobody knows. William wants some1 to connect with, n that just doesn’t seem like a possibility given that what he went thru in there is knowledge that only he himself + Hoffman carry.

but Lawrence knows. he understands n he's the one 2 kinda make that offer, to just be like “u don’t have 2 trust me right now, or even ever, but I understand n if u want some1 2 talk to, I’m here.” bc what does he have to lose? Adam is gone. Alison n Diana are gone. he’s by himself. and so is William, though he has Pamela. they’re both men who went thru smth unspeakably terrible bc a dying man wanted 2 play god n they came out of it much worse off than they ever were b4 John “helped” them. n William is just like. how much worse could it get? after Jigsaw, what could possibly be worse than what he’s already gone thru? so he’s just kind of like, “okay, we can work this out, I can’t say I trust u right now but maybe I can in the future. we can do this together. we can help each other.” n that’s how they end up meeting for coffee or breakfast/lunch/dinner every so often (coffee meets are at least weekly), n it’s just kind of like. the reassurance that some1 has seen the very worst parts of u and are still around. the relief of knowing someone sees u and knows how hard yr fighting to rebuild a life that’s been shattered into a million tiny pieces. n they’re struggling against that current together, and maybe it starts in a place of “I have no one else so I might as well chill w u,” but eventually William and Lawrence kind of fall into this uneasy friendship. they’re there for each other. William calls Lawrence when he has a nightmare that keeps him up fr hours after, shaking n w his heart beating out of his chest bc he doesn’t want to remember. Lawrence spends th night at William’s place every now n then bc he can’t be alone w his thoughts n the phantom pain in his leg just won’t quiet. they meet for coffee. they have breakfast sometimes. Lawrence has clothes n a toothbrush at William’s and vice versa. they’re in this together.

n maybe that escalates into more (which I believe wld only happen after they get 2 a point where they’ve discussed, at length, John’s legacy n who exactly would be continuing it + if anyone WLD be, n after Hoffman is “disposed of” in a sense), but even if not, they both know they Have Someone who looks at them n doesn’t see them as a monster, not the horrible person John thought he needed to “fix.” they both carry scars, both physically n mentally, frm what they went thru. they’re both struggling to get their bearings + Lawrence is still coping w what he’ll need to do after John’s (and eventually, Jill’s) passing. it won’t be easy, but they’re not walking alone. they’re wading thru the mud together, hand in hand, and fr William n Lawrence, that is enough.

[vanityloves]

anyways im gonna listen to/read the fuckin...rise of the ogre shit bc ive been putting it off 🪓🥴 im gonna put stuff under the cut bc im gonna be TALKING n dont wanna make a new post everytime

piss

ok he performed for 2 pounds 50. which is basically $3 today i- well it was absolutely a power play on his father behalf that also had the promise of money so.

also lol he said Rejection fueled my ambitions which, yknow,, i already knew but it still hurts and i will continue to talk ab it xoxo

AH HELP. "...if ebay had been invented at the time he would've sold me online there and then,"

"man hands on misery to man, yknow"

THEN PROCEEDS TO CONNECT IT TO MUSIC/HIS CAREER. this man said :) the one thing i truly have a passion for. the one thing i fucking like.

oh yeah. bullied by students AND teachers.

oh god hes 42ish during this interview? ok.

the fuckin school bully saying he wouldve acted differently if he knew what hed become

getting called "faceache", then proceeds to call 2d that. jfc he really does just repeat what everyone says. really "treating others how i was treated/how they treat me"

maybe thats why? hes kinder to fans? bc :] you support me and like me so, ok ill return that energy

MURDOC GETTING HIS ASS BEAT N PARADING HOME LIKE WELL I WON BC 'I PISSED YOU OFF' SJDJD

a real rowdy boy. absolute nasty boy. fraud and arson... shooting ppls windows with his air pistols

black sabbath being a huge inspiration? fucking absolutely.

became a satanist n shit at age 16? "it fitted me like a glove" "heavy metal and devil worshipping became my favorite past times" ajsj funny that ppl in trying times often seek religion or following of some sort

heavy metal being his favorite, n loving the clash, while hannibals was more punk based

hannibal breaking murdocs nose for the 2nd and 3rd time for playing his music on hannibals turntable

he doesnt sound that bitter? ab hannibal? he doesnt sound incredibly fond but he talks ab how he got him into a lot of music. so, i imagine they we're a bit closer than i thought?

international baccalaureate in antisocial? anthropology?

MURDOC IS ACTUALLY SMART HE WAS JUST. NOT INTERESTED IN THE SUBJECTS? I GUESS? (also,,, he literally Built cyborg noodle and i think he had a PhD too lol. but its always nice to hear hes actually...yknow, interested or good at other things)

alright but murdoc having a fascination w/ other cultures - or at least some interests, that lead him to actually study the damn subject and "pass with flying colors"

'fuck college though. im gonna be a rockstar'

he sold his soul at 18ish? whenever the fuck he got kicked out but college was mentioned so my brain goes to 18ish idk

he lived with his father still and paid rent via low paying jobs one including 'part time dressing as santa'

help he was ab to take a Personal Job for quick cash and uhh well, "still made me call him sir though" he really said 20 dollars is 20 dollars, huh "that story was totally true"

alright, 1997,,,

2d stuff

loves zombie stuff? thats really cute, and is freaked out by the way they move. god he rambles

both he and murdoc are horses in the chinese zodiac

[[jfc ok if the official shit compares them a lot i understand why ppl ship them but Dont. its a narrative foil and that doesnt always mean Romance jfc.]]

SUMTHINK.

truly... a lil stinker. super cute bouncing baby and a "bit thick" which is stull so endearing to me. hes just a happy man!

excitable 10 year old and would dance around his room

jfc the fact he has normal/caring parents. i kinda forget how opposite hes supposed to be from murdoc but i think thats another thing jsjsysg (murdoc said why isnt my tragic story making me famous why does he get to be the Star. no wonder he acts like a loon)

i still dont get how gettin bonked by a tree branch made him go bald and also turn his hair blue

big tiddy nurse mommy,,,

went to the same school as The Cure and got decent grades despite hittin the noggin quite hard. WANTED TO BE A STORM CHASER... OMG??

oh thats really cute, hed bond with his dad by building keyboards toegther 🥺💕

messed around with paints and graffiti? artistic king

MURDOC AGAIN: QHDJ 'VILLANOUS' GANG HELP

oh yeah d day...new instruments, new band, new singer - and 'had to be the best or no dice' and absolutely CONFIDENT that his songs were bangers ajsjd

but on that same note, had absolute faith (or desperate) in 2d which i love

ransacked the fucking music shop jdjdj and 2d said he was Just Standing There behind the counter the whole shift hdhdh

"thats when your eye came out, yeah" "yeah!-" HELP WHY DOES HE SOUND SO HAPPY AB IT ?? yes he said ut hurt but he sounds...ok

jfc murdoc ragdolling this poor mf around. dunking him and slapping him around. actually? so incredibly terrible and abusive and i hate him for that 🔫 im sorry 2d stans. we dont condone that behavior here ong.

how and why the FUCK did 2d's parents allow that fucker near their child after that i??? help. wtf. his moms a nurse why didnt she just have murdoc sit in plain view of other people. god damn.

2d flying out the window n hitting the curb "whoops"

"just two black holes...[ah] it looked great...a blue hair, blacked eyed GOD- the girls would go wild-" "pretty boy looks" ???? HELP. HE DOESNT GO LIGHT ON THE COMPLIMENTS, HUH

RUSS TIME

oh yeah, he straight up kiddnapped this man help. idk how he managed that, russ is a Big Man??

AND MURDOCS MUSIC WAS SO FUCKING SEXY GOOD that russel said hm alright ill stay, :] out ifbhis owm free will im screaming.

"oh this is one of them febreeze commercials" "uh . yeah sure. *murdoc turning on his Sick Tunes*" but that either means? it was just his guitar playing the convinced russ? unless he and 2d recorded sumn?

"2d was the looks, murdoc the brains, then russel truly was the heart"

'while 2d and murdoc liked music, this man was a MUSICIAN' god fucking bless this book holy shit ny man russ getting some respect. he said back hurts from carrying this band.

murdoc basically heard this guy had big trauma that gave him So Many Skills n said "thats what i want" ok idk thats actually really? inch rest ting to me. seems that murdocs fine handing out compliments but i guess that where his charisma really helps out yeah?

"he was going to be in my band whether he liked it or not" ...murdoc-

HELP. 2D IS LIKE BRO GO ON IM LISTENING 🥺 despite hearing the story 50-60 times and murdoc said fuck off you lil shit.

ok irrelevant but i love his voice! its super comforting n nice to listen to 🥺

HELP MURDOCS SO BITTER. "NOTHING THAT HAPPENS TO US IS NORMAL" WELL YEAH. THIS IS TRAUMA CENTRAL.

idk how/why he sucked up all his friends souls though ... how are they all possessing the same person. they said "its my turn on The Russ"

DELL IS HIS ACTUAL, LITERAL SOULMATE...KING...😭

went to a private school,,, and was already possessed? and the thing where he gets bigger and smaller is a reoccurring thing?

was in a coma for 4 years?

hiphop machine...time and history...the ultimate set i guess.

his knowledge was infinite and hes a "Renaissance man" hes so fucking smart our king. jack of all trades but a master of drums. he said i know im good and what of it

PAULA.

HELP. HE RMBRS THE STALL: CUBICAL NUMBER 3 🥴 IF I DO RECALL 🤤

yes russel our king. fuck up his nose 5 more times. probably stunted his growth too. he shrunk after russ gave him a wallop im sure

why dies paula sound like tracer overwatch

also only dated 2d for 2 months before joining the band?

HELP SHE REALLY WAS THE FIRST MURDOC FUCKER: "but when i saw murdoc with his thick greasy hair, green teeth and yellow skin i thought 'oh this is the ine for me!'" "OH HES SUCH A DANDY-" HELP ME IM HQJDHD

sick in the head...like i want to hurt people help girl. shes fucking Crazy. but she rly said damn i didnt hear back from him again 😭 and my purse is gone JSHHD

MURDOC: SHE WAS DEPRESSINGLY UGLY *still fucked her*

NOODLE TIME

"small japanese person!"

2d: we werent gorillaz until noodle arrived!

im dying the reason he chose gorillaz. 'swinging through the jungle baring my ass'

noodle really said "im just happy to be here" and she balanced everyone out 😭 "she gave off pure love and the fact that she could laugh at murdoc REALLY helped too" RUSS... IS BABY

JFC MURDOCS SO FUCKING CONFIDENT IN THIS BAND IM LIVING FOR THAT. HE SAID YOU WANT US SO BAD IT MAKES YOU LOOK STUPID. THE CHARISMA

2d rambling ab some girl he met and "ssSs" "whats the s stand for hawhaw" "i dont know!".

THE RECORD LABEL GUY.

one song is all it took i ❤ good for them

just murdoc talking ab the party that they threw for thier deal and saying "you dont know how much of a dick i felt like [when carrying one of those huge checks]" like oh thats whatll make you a dick? alright.

A FOOD FIGHT THAT WENT SO HARD THAT IT KNOCKED 2DS TONSILS OUT? WHAT THE FUCK

ahshdj damon and murdoc not getting along bc of Rival Band One Uppery + damon calling murdocs cuban heels crap since ge wore steel ones with gold spurs.

MURDOC FEELIN EMBARRASSED BC HES 'QUITE PROUD OF HIS SHOES'

but the band and damon getting over music and their ambitions and became a "paternal figure"

HELP MURDOC SAID AWIOGA @ RACHEL WHICH MADE HER THROW HER DRINK IN HIS FACE AND SPLIT FROM 2D. kinda sad actually, she said i still like 2d but murdoc kinda ruined it by trying to get it in with me, it put a strain in our relationship :/ oh god murdocs That Dude

nov 31 1998: started recording :]

40 tracks that got cut down to 15 holy shit

KONG STUDIOS 🤲

hooking up cameras in every room ejdjsu

webby artist of the year in 2006? holy shit

noodle learning ab kong studios omfg

JFC. YES I KNEW KONG WAS BUILT ON/IN A CEMETERY BUT I DIDNT KNOW PPL FOR THE FUCKING PLAGUE WHERE THROWN THERE HDJD

built in 1739?

the ghost of the first owners ghost still roams around in the kitchen in the early hours and moans 'aaa glass of water'

theres some rotting bullshit near the studios and in the summer its fucking TERRIBLE

the former owners were a biker gang, and they all died in a fire

murdoc said this place has bad vibes. i want it.

grim weather

the building feels impossible to escape from huHgg

[unproduciblesmackdown]

thank you teresa and soph for tagging me for 2020 Creator Wrap: Favorite Works

Rules: it’s time to love yourselves! Choose your 5 (or so) favorite works you created in the past year (fics, art, edits, etc.) and link them below to reflect on the amazing things you brought to the world in 2020. Tag as many writers/artists/etc. as you want (fan or original) so we can spread love and link each other to awesome works!

no particular order lol. wait also i didn’t quite follow “favorite” i suppose, i like, judged by Significance. but in a way that was still plenty subjective, so

tayston kiss on the Mouth - self-explanatory like of course it was crucial to draw a Tayston Kiss and i finally got around to it. also when i opened it now it was like “oh nice that’s cuter than i was remembering it even” lol. rly enjoy taylor here too like them in a tee and i like that they’re leaning back a bit but w/drawing their forearms/hands where i did it feels like they’re pulling winston in and i’m just overall like “nice that turned out well” @ drawing them here. i also personally enjoy the Blush Patch drawn in one linear stroke between them. it’s fun to try to have that essential detail be both Soft enough but also have some geometry to it b/c i’m always On That

riawin kiss on the Mouth - same thing all over again lol of course i had to draw it. and it started with several different failed attempts which was annoying but then i got this one in one night and it works well enough. also has a fun clothing detail in rian w/a hoodie (of winston’s) and once again i draw the hand-on-jaw l’intimacy and i think it Works Well again b/c why wouldn’t it, classic. also i’d been intending to draw the Lines detailing rian’s hair curls rather than silhouette and that was pretty fun to just jump into. oh i did the same thing with the Blush also, s/o to that. and the fact that there Is that height diff as depicted here....hopefully artistically successful in having you Think About It

tayston embrayston Cuddling - i think the first proper Fanart Of Fic? so that’s crucial. helping put the essential tayston ideas into the world and hopefully helping put People into Reading Said Fic, i’m glad this turned out to have enough of a relaxed vibe to do the concept’s written execution some justice....this was also just a success of “the colors i put down originally managed to be really Incongruous palette-wise” and i had to wrangle that situation with some added Layers lol but now they’re soft and nice i think, a much more Congruous pink-purple and i’m now remembering i struggled a lot picking a Solid Bg Color even though now a pale yellow seems like an obvious choice, s/o to the little border highlight around them i like that too....things turned out solidly here....enjoying the Geometry going on re: winston’s sleeve lol

agtikbi reprise - again i think it was Important to have done something for this absolutely iconic bit of media, thank you so much obcr for including this track. did a bunch of coloring for it (ft. many purple overlays as usual lol but that was always the plan) and the lineart i knocked out pretty fast w/o worrying about editing it super hard but it turned out solidly which is always a gift. really this was one of those “yeah it takes a while but i make pretty consistent progress and just knock it out in a couple of days” works ft. a decent amount of detail and that’s always an Epic Win and again i love agtikbi reprise so much so it was Very Good to have officially done something for it. also i’d been meaning to draw jeremy again for eons so that accomplished that goal too

monthlong riawinning - the opposite experience but also I Guess its own kind of win, where drawing is not quite as cooperative and one thing takes me A Month where it’s v much not consistent progress and i Do edit a lot which has pros (looks kinda fancy i guess) and cons (sweating details unnecessarily / overthinking or second guessing stuff / forest for trees or whatever / it takes ages and was it worth it....) like when i started with the Lineart Layer i was like “uh oh i’ve Cleaned This Up a lot but there’s already stuff i like too much to Restart this even though i’m not even close to halfway done yet” and yeah it took me ages to finish with lineart that’s been entirely Cleaned Up but then hey, you get this one thing with Completely Exhaustively Edited Lineart....i’m very Particular about like these self-imposed geometry rules re: lineart / shapes according to my own ~aesthetic sensibilities~ and stuff so like, it’s not even just a matter of Are The Lines Fairly Uniform Width / erasing stray marks / making sure the lines are all Closed and stuff, and even w/ the finished product it’s like “oh i could’ve connected some lines in rian’s hair for more Flow or moved this thing over by a few pixels or w/e,” isn’t that always the way though....it’s fun to have 1 Thing from this year v polished though. and i like the riawin contribution of “what if winston went down on rian and then there was this Snapshot Of Affection afterwards ft. an embrace and a kiss and the love language of tenderly feeling him up in the process” i was like “is this all Obvious or am i being too coy” and i was being too coy but here come opportunities like this one right here to make the meaning clearer i hope. that’s part of this pic’s Importance as well lmfao. the content of it and all

(everyone is tagged i think lol)

[mrsmess]

Faves and fails of SPN (season 13):

Favorite episodes in chronological order:

13:1 Lost and found - This is a very strong start of the season, might be one of the strongest intro episodes since the early seasons. Jack is actually instantly likeable, and apart from Dean shooting first and asking questions... kinda never, the boys do good. I also like the side characters, they make it clear that this could’ve been so much worse if some shitty people were first on the scene.

13:3 Patience - Loretta! Brought back from season 1 to die instantly. Oh wow. The SPN-way. But at least I dig the story. And Jody is here. And Sam is sweet to Jack. I’m fine.

13:4 The big empty - Cass is in the upsidedown. Jack goes hunting. Incidently, this discrepancy between the brothers is the kind I can get behind because it’s based on something real - a new family member, the loss of another, not some abstract drama where one of them lets their fear get the better of them and creates drama w/o even talking to the other. Spooky space entity in the big empty. Misha Collins, everyone! Nice. A kind shapeshifter. ”Even monsters can do good in this world.” Dean communicating sincerely. ”I need you to keep the faith, for both of us.” Cass - An angel so annoying that the big empty itself spat him back out.

13:5 Advanced Thanatology - honestly the brothers, loving them extra much this season, even when they argue. Hung-over Dean. Fun. Killing yourself for three minutes... Jeez, have you learned nothing ? No? Oh ok. It’s just a little death. And Sam’s reaction is more exhasperated than anything, it’s... funny. And then: ”I saw Cass kill you!” Yeah, like that matters. Also nice that the show finally ties up that whole how-do-people-die-w-no-death-thing.

13:6 Tombstone - STOP using ”but you died” as an excuse why people shouldn’t be back! Coming back from the dead isn’t just reserved for the Winchesters you know! Team free will 2.0. Nice! ”He’s an angry sleeper, like a bear” *spits out coffee* are you trying to kill me?! ”It’s good to have you back, Cass” to be constantly baffled by you. Jeez, the cringe! And the undertaker! Looking like a retro pinup crossed w Rosie the riveter! What a treat. Dean being a fanboy (and oh technically, couldn’t this obsession with cowboy-criminals count as a true crime -fad? No? Oh well.) Dean crawling through the ghoul-paths, referencing Die Hard. Good episode. Dean forgiving Jack. Sweet. Too bad Jack’s having none of it. They *have* raised a Winchester.

13:7 War of the worlds - a torture scene is the quickest way for me to start rooting for whoever is being tortured. Even Lucifer. Hey, and it’s also the quickest way to end up- if not on the fail list, then at least off the fave list. Oh, Ketch is back. Gun, mouth, now. Noooo, a twin! Shoot me twice. Fail list. Can’t be helped. Lucifer coming to Castiel’s rescue and burnin the brothers ”with their second-guessing and whining.” And Asmodeus showing up. Luci being sassy. Oh gods. Not an evil twin. I’m changing my mind, it stays on the fave list- what’s going? Oh I know: it’s an entire season of a soap crammed into one Supernatural episode. All the soap-tropes. It’s hysterical!

13:8 The scorpion and the frog - Dean insulting Smash’s excellent shoes. I rly don’t think you are in a position to criticize anyone’s wardrobe. Smash and Grab are funny. And the setting is too. And the brothers are really excellently cast in their roles in this heist: Sam as the awkward nerd and Dean as Mr TCB. Dean putting his hand into the bocca della verita! Sam: ”Dean! He’s immortal!” Dean: *knocks Shrike out*. Oh Dean. ”I just had an idea, but it’s a little crazy.” ”I’m good with crazy.” Crazy’s the only game in town. The Winchesters and the curveballs. Rolling Shrike in front of them. Brilliant! Good ending. But Sam! You know how to kill anything but you don’t know that you don’t blow on a burning piece of paper to put it out? .... *shrugs* that actually makes sense.

13:9 The bad place - instantly liking this artist. Crazy about the premise 3 minutes in. And very upset 5 minutes in. Poor Derek! The return of Patience, I’m equally pleased and distraught, stay away, girl! And Kaia! And Dean coming around to Jack. That’s sweet. Jeez, is that a helicopter shot. Hella pretty! Omg! Finally giant monster time! *chills* i have been waiting for this my whole life.

13:10 Wayward sisters - Holy hell. This season has been frickin awesome so far, and now I get all my babies together. Saving Sam and Dean. Finding Kaia. My heart is just full of rainbows.

13:12 Various and sundry villains - Oh no! I liked Dale. See here we are again, using actors from previous seasons: it’s the chick from Twihard and apparently she’s not random enough. Ugh . Oh! So this is a goofy!Dean episode! Those are usually welcome. The setup for this is very annoying though. Thank godess for Rowena! Bringing all the truths. I think I love her. Woah. Killing the girls like that. Harsh. Sam being soft and giving her the spell. I love him.

13:17 The thing - this episode makes me realise there’s not enough tentacles in Supernatural. Gabriel! Back with the boys! I’m so pleased.

13:18 Bring ’em back alive - Charlie! Gabriel! Lucifer! This is just a deeply satisfying episode. On multipel levels. I love the characters standing up for themselves, in different ways. Charlie’s simple line: ”that’s not your call” struck a cord; not everybody chooses to join your fight, some have their own and the right walk away from yours.

13:19 Funeralia - the right amount of silly according to Mr Mess and that counts for something around here. Sam showing genuine remorse at shooting Rowena and Rowena being genuinely upset that he would. I’m moved. And Rowena’s consession. The boys giving Rowena a pep talk! My heart!

Fail episodes in chronological order:

13:11 Breakdown - Donna is always a win, but dark and gritty? And monsters on the internet. Nah. Too much torture porn.

13:22 Exodus - have I mentioned that I don’t watch Supernatural for the post-apocalyptic scenarios? If I’m expected to deal with that type of grit I’m gonna need a whole lot more kissing.

13:13 Devil’s bargain - Ketch’s mere presence is enough to put this episode on the fail list. If he’s gonna be in this show the least he could do is to regrow that beard of his. Also the fact that Lucifer simply cannot chill. Gabriel is back but alas, doesn’t make up for the episode.

Honorable mentions:

Og and Magog are two hoots and a half.

The animators making the brothers equally tall in Scoobynatural. That’s adorable!

Camo-Samo in the final episodes.

Jack saying I love you to Sam in the final episode kinda killed me.

Mediocre mentions:

The rising son - Can tell pretty early that this is gonna bore me, and it does, but any scene with Jack and the boys is good. ”What would Mr Rogers do?” Good question. ”Dean feels like he has to protect everyone.”

Unfinished business - always here for Gabriel/Loki stuff, especially when it involves both Gabriel and Loki. But idk, vengence as a theme... not my favorite. Mary is sweet though.

Beat the devil - Rowena and Gabriel, I’m just so happy. But wtf were they thinking leaving Rowena w Lucifer. That pisses me off. Almost so that I can’t enjoy the reunion of Jack and Sam. Almost.

Summing up:

The shining star of this season is Jack.

It feels a bit like this is what I’ve been waiting for, for the boys to use what they know constructively and practically and personally: when they’ve met people in need of guidence before they’ve ditched them with someone they’ve deemed as more maternal but now they take Jack with them, which allows them both to be big brothers. That’s good.

[dark-naruto]

Hi!! ❤️❤️ I was wondering what your top Naruto fics are?? Doesn’t have to be sns (though that’s the best), I just really crave some fanfic 😭 thank you!!

i’m SO SORRY this took me so long to complete; i know i said it might take a while but i still never meant for it to take THIS long;;; i’ve been really busy lately and when i actually get some free time i just don’t have any mental energy left😫 ANYWAY, this is by no means an exhaustive list of my faves, but my memory’s p terrible, so this is the best i could do😭 I’M SURE there are many excellent fics that i just couldn’t recall on the spot, but I TRIED😣 listed in no particular order:

40m² by winterdesu: rating: mature; words: 11,544; post-war cohabitation; nar & sask emotionally support each other, cook together, and grow a balcony-full of houseplants. a smidgen of angst.

Scores, Settled by hanakage: rated: M; words: 8,908; bartender naruto, ad-exec sasuke. sasuke goes to the bar naruto works at during the world cup to research an ad campaign he’s working on. naruto shares his love of football w him and stuff… idk it’s rly cute i’m bad at summaries just read it lol

Advantage: Us by sirona: rating: Teen And Up Audiences, words: 30,947; tennis au; the boys meet when they’re kids at a tennis camp and then go on to compete against each other at Wimbledon when they’re older! idk if u can tell but i looove sports aus, even though i know NOTHING about any sport lol. there’s a short vignette that follows this fic, Home is where you are, rated Mature.

bleary by upottery: rating: Explicit; words: 2,813; this one’s basically a pwp, but w a looot of emotions and intimacy and j u s t 😌 it’s v soft n good and i love it. ninjaverse!

Spacey ramen and the idiotic two by taeggukswitch (rooxynroll): rating: Teen And Up Audiences; words: 10,950; idiots in spaaaaace! nar is a pilot and sasuke’s a programmer, they meet when they’re paired up for an exploration trip. as one of the author’s tags says, ‘they’re intelligent af but also share one brain cell’ and this is extremely correct. it’s just a v cute and enjoyable read! 

prairie town by applecrumbledore: rating: Teen And Up Audiences; words: 8,698; sasuke’s a research scientist who moves to a small town; his car breaks down and he meets hunky local mechanic naruto. i’m sooo bad at summaries lmao, but this is super soft and sweet and i read it whenever i’m feeling down as i consider it to be a p reliable cure for depression! 

Realization (In a Drunken Haze) by playitagain: rating: Mature; words: 25,509; major warnings for alcoholism/alcohol abuse, so if that’s something that really bothers you, you should maybe avoid this one! personally, i think this is the most realistic depiction of alcoholism & recovery i’ve ever read in a fanfic- so often, even when it’s pretty clear that one of the characters has a drinking problem, it’s never really addressed, or even if it is, there isn’t a realistic portrayal of the recovery process. like, the character will just fall in love and then miraculously get over their problem and then it’s happily ever after. and while having a caring, supportive partner can be an essential part of recovery, love isn’t a magical cure, yk? ANYWAY, nar’s an english professor working toward his phd, sasuke is a student (not in any of nar’s classes) working on his master’s degree. iirc, sasuke’s age was ever specified, but i don’t THINK it’s implied that there’s any more than a few (maybe 2 or 3?) years difference between them, so no ugly a/ge g//ap business going on here. nar’s in steadfast denial throughout most of the fic that he’s an alcoholic, but with sasuke’s support, he finally starts on the (sometimes bumpy) road to recovery.

What about you? by cambion: rating: Teen And Up Audiences; words: 14,974; nar’s two best friends both come out to him, forcing him to get introspective about the exact nature of his feelings for sasuke. this one’s ninjaverse, with sasuke AND team taka back in konoha, and idk it’s just v gooood…

here comes the sun (and his kid, and a whole lot of love) by moonwatcher: rating: Explicit; words: 34,808; modern, single parent au. this one does have past ss and nh, but they’re really almost never mentioned so even if that’s typically a disqualifier for you, you still might enjoy this one. sas n nar meet at a pta meeting at their kids’ school, where nar is also a teacher. there are a looot of cute sasuke & sarada moments in this, some cute nar & boruto moments as well (no himawari in this fic tho; both guys each have only one kid), and some gooood mutual pining. it’s just really sweet and cute and i liked it a lot!!

Tough Love by Rasengan22: rated T; words: 5,729; this one’s p angsty compared to most of the other recs on this list; sasuke’s suffering from PTSD and depression following a car accident, and he’s isolating himself and having difficulty leaving his house as a result. he’s successfully managed to push most of his friends away, however naruto proves to be incredibly persistent and won’t give up trying to help him. as someone who is struggling with a lot of the same issues that sasuke is, this one hit home really hard for me. i just WISH i had a naruto who refused to give up on me;;;;

Change by stammi_vicinora: rating: mature; words: 18,378; naruto convinces sasuke to take an unprecedented day off from work, and sasuke uses his free day learning to relax and unwind a bit w his bf. this one’s just really fluffy and sweet!!!

All things of dearest value hang on slender strings by sirona: rating: Mature; words: 15,713; hokage naruto and anbu captain sasuke. during a particularly hot summer in konoha, naruto plans a beach festival for all the villagers. this one’s really fun and cute, and it may already be on virtually every fic rec list ever made, but it’s one of my faves so i still have to include it!!

Love Is Blind by OfFansAndFlames: rating: Teen And Up Audiences; words: 992; after an accident causes him to lose his vision, sasuke plays it pretty safe for the first couple of years, until naruto convinces him to put his trust in him and take a risk: by going for a ride with him on the back of his motorcycle. this one’s short & sweet, and i just loooove the element of taking a leap of faith with someone you feel safe & comfortable with to do something that’s seemed impossible to you for so long. it reminds me that with the right support, you can do things that have seemed beyond your capabilities and find a new appreciation for life! ❤

the hard-knock life of a walmart cashier by geminiuchiha: rating: General Audiences; words: 26,650; nart & sask are college students and co-workers at walmart in this one, and it’s just!! rly funny and cute!!! i know i’ve described p much every fic so far as cute sdjslfjdssd but that’s my favorite kind of fic, so !!! mutual pining ftw!!

Mirai Kissaten by fourangers: rating: General Audiences; words: 3,586; despite the fact that he doesn’t really like coffee, sasuke ended up becoming a regular at a coffee shop near his work. it might have something to do with the cute owner that always serves him when he stops by every evening on his way home. this is a really cute coffee shop au, super fluffy and sweet!

and, last but not least! 3 of my faves by kinomiakai:

A Night of Poor Choices by KinomiAkai: rating: Explicit; words: 13,134; sasuke is convinced by his friends to go out to a bar with them to celebrate hitting an important financial milestone in a video game they’re developing. since the bar scene really wasn’t for him, he found himself wandering outside the club, where he meets a very cute dog leashed to a parking meter. a few minutes later, he meets the dog’s very cute owner… this one is just extremely cute!!! kurama’s an adorable stinker who’s far too smart for his own good n___n

Rebuilding by KinomiAkai: rating: Explicit; words: 25,705; this one is ninjaverse, post-war, and i mean, it’s p much essential reading imo!! reading it was extremely healing for me, so if u (somehow) haven’t read it yet, i really can’t recommend it enough!! so so sooo good!!!!!

Enter Naruto by KinomiAkai: rating: Explicit; words: 112,230; sasuke and naruto are both college students in this, with sas studying creative writing and nar studying psychology. sasuke takes his professor’s advice and goes to a cafe looking for inspiration, where he ends up meeting naruto! this is another all-time fave!! i save re-reads for when i’m really depressed, bc it always makes me feel better;; it’s just… r e a l l y sweet and good 😌💗

[srnokedmirrors]

* . time stands still , the way it did before.     it’s like i’m  s  l  e  e  p  w  a  l  k  i  n  g .

                          { courtney eaton, twenty-four, agender, they/them } Have you seen JACK C. KENNEDY walking around?  Little do they know, they’re the child of LEON S. KENNEDY from RESIDENT EVIL, and they ARE AN ONLY CHILD.  I guess that explains why they’re so CRAFTY & RESOURCEFUL and ALOOF & SELF-SERVING.  They are a COLLEGE STUDENT.  — penned by eve.

FIRST THINGS FIRST.

Hey guys !! I’m EVE , twenty from the EST timezone ( pronouns are she/her ) and I have TWO kids to introduce to you guys - the first being Jackie here !! I’m a huge fan of video games hence why my first two children are from them - RE in particular is one of my favorites. It’s a popular franchise , but if you’re not too familiar with it do not fret because all you need to know about Jack , their dad , and the world they originate from will be in here. And I apologize profusely if this is too long because I . . . have a tendency to ramble so !! Let’s get on with it.

TWS : Mental illness / depression ( implied ) , mentions of bullying & death & violence

I. THE PAST - DO YOU REMEMBER ??

You are born Jacqueline Cheri Kennedy , the first & only child of your father - Leon Scott , a lone survivor of the fallen Raccoon City - with no mother in the picture. Your father always wanted children , but his line of work is cruel to those who hold their loved ones dear , and originally the prospect was brushed off. But you are an accident - left on his doorstep - and the man who originally thought he’d never have children due to a fear of losing what he’s attached to . . . . he SOBS , holding your tiny body close and vowing that now , he has a new reason to live and not just survive.

So you grow. You grow fast , and as a child , you know a few truths - you like princesses & superheroes , and you are your papa’s little princess & your papa is your superhero. And you are treated the best you can - in the early years of your youth , you have to spend multiple week trips sleeping over at your Aunt Ashley’s before your father suddenly tells you ‘Daddy isn’t going to work anymore’ and he’s with you all day , every day , save except for school. You grow up with your father as your best friend and you know he loves you more than anything.

You are ten years old when you start to understand things - not ENOUGH , and not too much , but you can understand the fact that in a way , your beloved papa is sick. But it’s not the germy kind of sick - not the kind of sick that results in tummyaches or sniffles. No , it’s the kind of sick that you can tell his heart isn’t working - it’s broken , and you can tell his smile sometimes doesn’t reach his eyes and the weird stuff he drinks is to help with it - but he doesn’t want you to know he’s sick. He SMILES at you and plays with you and hugs you tightly and kisses your forehead and reads you bedtime stories and everything seems okay - but you know your superhero can’t fly as high as he used to , and you know he’s more sad than he lets on. But he does everything so he thinks you don’t catch on , and so you are happy even if he isn’t.

You are twelve years old when the big men in black jackets & bulletproof vests come knocking on your father’s door to beg him to come back to them , and he says hell no and there’s an argument you don’t listen to since FRANKLY , you’re busy pasting up posters of rock bands in your bedroom. You know your father doesn’t talk a lot about where he used to work or what he used to do - the only inkling you get is the next day , when you’re innocently helping your father find his unopened pack of plastic razors in his bedroom , and you open a drawer with a shiny badge that says ‘Raccoon City Police Department.’

You are fourteen when you first start finding your own voice - you are hardened from bullying that comes your way and you grow BLUNT & SARCASTIC and a lot of your father’s friends tell you that you’re just like him. This becomes a bit of a joke between the two of you - but it escalates further in school. They call you Jackboot since that’s a symbol of the opposite of what you stand for - you TALK BACK , you rebel , you aren’t afraid to show your poisoned tongue and it gets you in trouble. But you remain authentic - even if people don’t like you. But you’re still vulnerable - your first boyfriend breaks your heart and as you’re crying through screams & wails on your couch , your father gently hugs you close , rubbing your back and telling you you’re going to be okay. You are hardened , but you are not unbreakable.

You are fifteen when you finally realize why your father feels the way he does and why he quit his job , and why he’s so protective of you. You are innocently putting on makeup to get ready for homecoming when you hear gunshots coming from the living room. You pull out the shotgun your father keeps under his bed and when you head downstairs , your house is being broken into by MINDLESS DRONES OF THE UNDEAD and thank god you inherited your father’s accuracy , because you save one from biting your father’s cheek and then , he grabs you , and the two of you book it out of the area.

. . . Your father . . . was the only survivor of an outbreak - a bioterrorist attack - back in Raccon City. Your father was a cop for one day , and then worked as a government agent to quell parasitical outbreaks in Spain , and then the fall of Tall Oaks , and countless other machines. You learn the words Umbrella and C-Virus and T-Virus and thank GOD you are a fast learner since this is the reality of the life you’ll have to live in time. And your father holds you close and sobs and begs you to live your life the best you can , away from the shit he went through , but one evening is far too much - and you have already seen too much.

You still know the truth , though. You are still your papa’s little princess and he is your superhero - but your superhero earned his hero status at the price of his own happiness. And maybe you’re almost doomed to do the same.  

You are sixteen when you’re ripped from everything. Sixteen when you lose sight and it’s all erased. And sixteen when your superhero fades from your existence and you remember nothing but normalcy - and maybe it’s for the better. Maybe it’s also for the worse.

II. THE PRESENT - WHO ARE YOU , YOURSELF ??

S’OKAY SO. I’m gonna try and highlight what Jack is like with and without memories - their personality honestly doesn’t change much aside from obvious Resident Evil stuff & their bond with their dad.

WITH MEMORIES : So to start , Jack is an extremely blunt individual - they have a tendency to be a little bitch-faced and kinda-sorta don’t show their emotions very well , but they’re also extremely honest and don’t lie at all. They DO have a sense of morals & take everything they learned from their dad to heart - especially given the fact that now they’re aware of everything he’s done and been through and that they’re gonna be going through the same thing. But they also carry around a Devil-may-care attitude , snarky & rebellious and honestly maybe a bit short-tempered. But they are smart. They are smart and they know it and thank god they know how to act quickly on their feet in bad situations - they’re just. Kind of a dick. 

WITHOUT MEMORIES : So Jack wasn’t as nearly as close with their fake-life parents as they were their actual father , Leon , and that impacts them in the sense that they’re slightly more of a lone wolf than they were before losing their memories. They only remember rebelling against their parents & fighting with them whereas in real time . . . Jack & Leon never really argued. Jack never really disobeyed. But NOW they just remember always doing what the opposite of what their parents said and that sorta fuels their fire. And also , Jack isn’t haunted by what they’ve seen in terms of bioterrorism and viruses and all that , so that leaves them unaffected. They overall don’t change much , they’re just . . . them.

GENERAL FACTS ABOUT THEM AHEAD THAT REALLY DON’T CHANGE , BUT

Jack . . . is kind of. A philanderer aishufhasush like I will not lie to you they are an extreme flirt and honestly get around but will never commit due to the fact they fear strong attachments and what they mean so just. Apologies for that.

And when I say Jack is self-serving , I mean so in the sense that they only do things if the consequence benefits them or something they care for or someone they care about - like Jack will help their loved ones because they love their loved ones , but otherwise , they really just . . . want to only get involved if it physically , mentally , financially , socially , what have you benefits them.

They’re a DICK but they’re not like... an awful , awful person. They’re just sorta someone who mainly thinks of themselves and looks out for number one and those who PERTAIN to number one. It’s sorta better to show their character rather than like . . . tell , because they’re not the most nicey-nice OC but they’re like they’re dad - kind of grouchy & snarky sometimes but still with good intentions and not at all a bad person. Leon’s such a good character and Jack is both EXTREMELY like him and also. Not. 

Also rly quick Jack’s pronouns are again they/them and they take both masculine and feminine titles if there isn’t a gender-neutral option available. Jack said fuck gender.

ANNEA-WAAAYYYY onto the next part -

III. THE FUTURE - WHO MAKES YOUR CIRCLE ??

Just ?? General WCs I guess ?? Idk I got no braincells when it comes to this shit but

I’m gonna get the begging for hookup & ex connections out of the way FIRST because Jack is honestly. Again. A philanderer. Definitely kinda like a fuckboy tbh ausydgygdyagysgds

ALSSOOOOOO I’d love 2 see ppl that Jack just frequently butts heads with ?? Again they are kinda fighty so I’d love to see some enemies around

They don’t have a lot of friends so a few friends would be nice - but only a FEW close friends bc again Jack doesn’t rly open up , they keep their cards to their chest while simultaneously being an open book and it’s Confusing 

may b a longshot but . . . o-other . . . Resident Evil kids ?? Please ?? Baby Redfields ?? Please ??

IDK LIKE I’LL RLY TAKE ANYTHING BUT. that’s it for now if i do ciel’s intro tonight i will be genuinely shocked bc i’m EXHAUSTED bt yeah !! here’s jack !!

[viktcrr-archive]

MAXENCE DANET FAUVEL / NONBINARY. — viktor samuels is really making a name for themselves as a tier 3 shepherd. i think that he/they are studying english + visual arts in their senior year at lockwood, living in peregrinis. originally from rochester, new york, viktor is known to be observant & ingenious, but can also be reticent & dependent. — james / 20 / est / she/they.

3/5 !!! once again ... little edits

TW DEATH, HEAVY GRIEF, OVERDOSE / DRUG ADDICTION, HOSPITALIZATION, HYPERSEXUALITY, RELIGION MENTIONS, MENTAL ILLNESS

a e s t h e t i c s

old tvs and their static, worn tapes, horror movie screams, spilled ink, a sculptor’s hands, clay-stained, chicken scratch handwriting, messy notes, messy hair, scoffs and eye-rolls, bruised knuckles, sore throats, funeral homes and a crying preacher, shattered ceramics, knife fights, high ledges, vertically-striped pants, red lights, the moon shrouded in clouds, cigarette butts.

general info !!

full name: viktor phillip samuels

nickname(s): icky vicky :/

b.o.d. - jan 2nd

label(s): the black hole, the crepehanger, the impious, the opaque, the tempest, etc.

height: 6′0″

hometown: rochester, new york

sexuality: uuuhhh god … probably pan tbh

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biography !!

okay so … born and raised in rochester, new york to the well known samuels family. preacher father, a mother, a twin sister born 15 minutes before him - aka tatiana samuels, who died back in january.

kinda … grew up as a really awkward, quiet kid? like … just didn’t really interact with other kids super well, preferred being alone and like … digging up bugs in the dirt. only friend was like … his own sister.

grew out of this as they got older, instead sort of … becoming a bit of a dick? to compensate for years of awkwardness? will bite the hand that feeds him. was a full on nuisance by middle school. tatiana was not, at least, noticeably.

has always been a fan of darker materials, y’know - grim and creepy, morbid shit. big fan of tim burton ever since he was a kid, which isn’t … a good look for a preacher’s son, but he’s never really felt ~in~ with the rest of his family, anyway.

drew disturbing pictures as a kid probably tbh that prompted one or two or five phone calls home 2 assure everything was fine.

has always been really … good at art, in general - from drawing to painting to playing with clay, that’s always been viktor’s Thing.

aNyWaYs. being tatiana’s twin brother was kinda hard sometimes. tatiana and him were near opposites besides their same mean-spirited trait. she was better in the public than he was, but viktor was arguably more talented than tatiana. they both loved each other deeply and found each other as competition for their parents’ attention - a rivalry, of sorts.

high school is when viktor really started to act out - started extreme, like losing his virginity in their church and vandalism around the neighborhoods. faked being possessed in the middle of sunday service. almost had an exorcism performed on him, probably.

the only redeemable trait was like … his sheer talent with art. was in a 3d art AP course, specialized in sculpting - could pretty much create anything he wanted with enough dedication.

because his parents would be focused on disciplining him for his antics, tatiana could sneak away and get away with stuff easier. so like, y’know, that’s on the bright-side of things.

never been particularly motivated to do much - wasn’t planning on attending lockwood but his parents kinda … did and sent in his application for him b/c they were Not on board with him Wasting Away (wanted him out of the house asap)

actually pretty smart !! just doesn’t like … want to apply himself ever. double majoring in english and visual arts because they’re like … two of his only interests :/ plus he wants to write and illustrate his own series of children books with a style similar to tim burton’s

he’d been experimenting since high school but college is where he really started to like … crack down on himself and figure himself out. was out as pan & nonbinary by his sophomore year of college, just … not to his family, necessarily. thinks tatiana always knew, but didn’t … really use it against him, blessedly enough

always felt like the whole twin - connection thing was … both wack and also not-wack? sometimes it felt believable but sometimes he had no idea what was going on in tatiana’s head. but he felt oddly transparent to her, always - like he was predictable to no one but her.

( TW DEATH, GRIEF, OVERDOSE / HOSPITALIZATION BEYOND THIS POINT )

but when tatiana disappeared - it was like, like viktor knew. the moment she had been kidnapped - felt something deeply wrong in his gut. and when tatiana died - viktor felt something cut so severely in him. he knew, he always knew exactly when. he couldn’t put his finger on how - but he knew. even when everybody else held out hope for her to be found - he knew.

went on a bender around the same time, had always struggled w/ drug addiction but it got worse the longer tatiana went without being found.

( also struggled heavily with his mental health, too ?? has manic and depressive episodes. will fixate on a sculpting project for six months and then purposely knock it off the table and destroy it in the matter of seconds once it’s finished for. no fucking reason. impulse spends A Lot. )

when her body was found, viktor went off the rails. ended up overdosing and being hospitalized where he spent the next like … however long months … until they deemed him better.

stayed out of school until very recently b/c he just … didn’t want to go back. didn’t want to deal with it. didn’t want to be known as the dead girl’s twin. but then his mom kinda just was like ‘u go back 2 school or god so help me’ n he was like FINE.

so ya !! viktor’s back after being gone since tatiana’s body was found. that’s it, that’s him, a lil glimpse of his life.

trying to finish his senior year b/c he … obviously left before he could.

finding out that it was george who killed tatiana has ultimately ... caused viktor to spiral. his lows are some of his lowest, his highs are ... very high, but very bad. unstable & unpredictable in his actions it’s ... a whole thing :/

personality !!

the human embodiment of a gremlin, fed after midnight. a goblin, if u will. one of those cats with a narrow head and big ass ears. that’s him.

b i g horror & halloween enthusiast. loves the old campy horror movies. probably has an abundance of masks from different movies. dresses like a grimy millennial beetlejuice more than he should. love those vertically striped pants!

fashion alternates between e-boy (would b tik tok famous if he were like … 17), millennial beetlejuice, and like … goth in a crop top and sweatpants. big fan of crop tops. big fan of sweatpants.

he can be fucking mean. petty, aggressive, instigator. will literally spit in ur face or no reason. kind of person who’ll stick his gum into other ppl’s hair. other than that he’s like … pretty okay. he’s not always mean, he’s just a dick like … 70% of the time lmao

i mean yeah okay he’ll call someone a stinky bitch for no reason except He Feels Like It And Believes It. it’s fine he’s fine, we’re fine.

despite the fact tht he’s probably getting into fights whenever - considers himself 2 be a lover n not a fighter but that’s just because he Fucks a lot. kind of uses it like a coping mechanism, like he’s this big fancy carnival show that’s like ‘come one, come all! fuck the dead girl’s twin brother!’ may have a problem w/ hypersexuality but it’s nothing he’s fully. aware of.

the preacher’s whore son, basically

like i said he’s pan & nb, switches between he and they pronouns but like … he has such a fragile grip on his identity that u could call him ‘dog-faced bitch’ and he’d turn like hey wassup :)

vastly impulsive, like i’ve mentioned … destroys his own creations 4 the fun of it, spends all his money on useless shit, will cheat on someone bc he feels like it. screams into the night sky frequently, like a cat in heat.

i mean he also creates useless shit for no reason too. spent six months sculpting a hollowed out tree the size of him and then took a sledgehammer to it.

dramatic fuck. used to play the organ at the church like … when no one was looking after him and service was about to start. just these creepy as melodies. would do the same thing at home on his keyboard w/ the organ setting whenever he got grounded until his parents took away his keyboard sadjfkg

won’t talk about his time away b/c it’s not rly anybody’s business but ofc nothing is sacred to the watershed app, y’know, nothing’s private.

still like - he absolutely refuses to talk about tatiana’s death and like, his mental health or his addiction (he’s fallen back into it tbh but it hasn’t gotten bad again … yet) or like … anything involving his own emotions

will literally just change the topic! abruptly, no warning, asks about the jonas brothers instead.

that being said he’s obsessed with tatiana’s death. tatiana was very much a rock for him, kinda dependent on her in a way? just … being there, y’know, kept him grounded.

so he obv became a shepherd bc he wants to know Everything there is abt the app, wants to be deep inside it, wanted to know Who Exactly Killed Tatiana and like … not saying he wants 2 commit murder but :/ yknow. he’s very upset.

emotionally unavailable while also like crying twice a day.

will tell you straight up what he wants from you, no bullshit, no beating around the bush - just blunt. if he wants to just fuck, nothing else, then that’s that. if he feels deviation he’ll ghost in like. less than a second. kinda awful like that! feels no shame.

but like … also is emotional ?? as shit ?? it’s confusing. he’ll cry on a whim and then flip u off if u try to console him or like. ask him anything. will bite you.

he goes to therapy but he generally fucks around and wastes most of the time until the therapist threatens to like … idk what therapists r allowed to threaten. to send him off to another therapist? idk.

likes being intimidating but like … not with his body or nothing ‘cos he’s a TWIG, but like … uses his love for horror n creepy shit to his advantage. has an abundance of fake blood. has channeled the energy of jack nicholson and used it on tatiana’s boyfriends before.

( also a big fan of sfx makeup, has dabbled in it)

probably chases kids with a chainsaw (w/o the like … chain … or w/e … so it’s not actually Dangerous) around halloween

he’s generally never doing good, both mental health wise and morally.

would probably steal candy from a baby for the fun of it.

i don’t know if there’s a good to him, deep down, and i don’t know if he sees any issues with himself either !! nothing really breaks through to him anymore, the only person who ever really made him stop and Think about his actions was tatiana.

kinda introverted, recluse type who doesn’t rly like most people or going out, but he’ll go to parties if it means he’ll be high as shit.

pretty observant. likes to analyze people even though he’s probably not … fully right.

connections to the victims !!

tatiana samuels / his twin sister, other half - the only one able to control viktor.

george craig iii / close family friends ... they could appreciate each other, when viktor wasn’t being an outright asshole.

hana williams / ‘friends’ with benefits, their relationship was rocky at best but she was a good lay. have often fought due to their clash in personalities and viktor’s history with christoph.

christoph wainwright / an ex-hook up, an infrequent occasion whenever christoph wanted to tick off hana. viktor was often on board, never the one to consider others’ feelings.

wanted connections !!

he lives alone currently but like … ex - roommates where viktor was just. a nightmare to live with.

feel like a lot of enemies is also a possibility !! viktor’s messy.

people that like … knew tatiana. dated tatiana, even, and viktor would pretty much try to intimidate / scare them at any given chance :/

close friends of tatiana too

people who hated tatiana but liked viktor. people who hated viktor but liked tatiana

people who take pity on him and he Hates it viciously and vocally.

a band of hooligan gremlin kids who do drugs and fuck shit up around town like they’re edgy teenagers even though they’re all early to mid 20s.

the girl he lost his virginity 2 in high school lmao … a distant memory

fellow rochester locals, from church or school or whatever

exes from the past !! good terms and bad terms, but i love bad terms a whole lot mainly b/c viktor’s a jackass.

don’t know if he’s soft towards anybody but we can try. we can Try.

friends, old friends, new friends, bad friends, good friends, close friends, frenemies, etc. etc. all of it

hookups !! so many hookups. fwbs, one night stands, whatever.

uuhhhh god. i don’t know. im so sleepy rn. people in the same major or similar majors.

maybe a ride or die.

people he’s a bad influence on / an enabler towards / all around toxic for them / each other.

people he’s fought !! people who’ve seen him get into random fights and were like ‘uh wtf’

fellow shepherds !!

literally anything im not picky.

[dragimal]

TROS thoughts? TROS thoughts.

just some thoughts abt TROS and the trilogy as a whole. I don’t actively talk abt SW much so this’ll prolly be p disorganized, but I just wanted to throw some thoughts to the wind lmao. also thanks @cobwebbing for bullying me into watching TROS as quickly as possible and also yelling abt all these jumbled thoughts with/at me

overall I rly liked it! with a lot of criticisms! and I’ll expand under the cut

so, as usual, everything reylo was p spectacular. Rey trading off her light-saber to Kylo? that last bombastic kiss? Kylo fading into a force ghost to presumably reunite w/ his family? the mutual healing of one another-- and in particular, Kylo not only sharing his own life-force, but that which Rey had previously gifted him for the stab wound??? the DRAMA! the ROMANCE!! I was going absolutely (mentally) HOGWILD during those scenes, AAAAA I couldn’t have asked for better! Rey and Kylo are totally gonna have a force-ghost honeymoon and I’m here for it

my one big criticism w/ anything involving them was Palp being Rey’s grandad. Star Wars has always had weird hangups abt bloodlines, so it felt very fresh to see the protag be a whole-ass nobody-- u don’t need to come from some line of force-sensitive heroes/baddies to be somebody! ANYBODY can be somebody if they choose to be! yeah, she technically still renounced her “evil blood” to be a good person, but it felt a lot cheaper than just letting her be a nobody that chooses that path. I feel like there’s a nugget of good to be found in her adopting the Skywalker name at the end (y’all know I’m a sucker for adopted family~), but compounded w/ all the other hangups w/ bloodlines, it kinda felt like another affirmation that only Skywalkers can ever be the big important heroes or something, idk

that all said, I don’t hate Palp’s existence in TROS, I just don’t want him related to Rey in any way. tho his existence was still a bit awkward at parts (Snoke was a clone? who were all those cultists in the stands around the throne? how did he even survive the first trilogy?? hello???). but overall I rly liked the idea that the reason Sith kill their masters is for some reincarnation-death ceremony. when u hold that against the fresh new cast of heroes in this trilogy, you get this theme of, “evil ideals are always the same-- stagnant and unchanging. good must evolve and grow to combat it.” if that makes sense? I just rly like that implication

it was weird how easily Kylo seemed to drop any connection to Vader? like when Rey knocked Vader’s mask on the ground, I thought Kylo would either feel angry that she almost destroyed it, or betrayed by the reminder that he was never rly talking to Vader anyways, or SOMETHING, but he kinda just left it there in the snow? it was just strange, after all the build-up

now aside from anything involving Rey and Kylo, everything else was..... well, it was abt as I expected. which wasn’t good, coming off the heels of TLJ’s treatment of anyone that wasn’t Rey, Kylo, or Luke. while JJ and Rian do a fantastic job w/ reylo stuff, they seem to just let everything else fall to the wayside, which is unfortunate in a lot of ways

for one, Finn is one of my favorite characters in SW as a whole, and it’s heartbreaking to see his character arcs fall apart before they even start (post-TFA). he has so much depth and potential-- enough to even be the main protag, as some have pointed out. while I don’t agree that he’s a better foil to Kylo (and that’s not just my reylo bias, like they rly don’t have the same personality chemistry or thematic conflicts imo), I could totally see a SW trilogy centered around him instead (tho idk if I’d be able to properly doctor the script to THAT degree on my own... 🤔...)

either way, Finn’s potential was rly squandered the last two movies, and I’d love to see that rectified. I’ve always been disappointed that Finn immediately went to shooting other stormtroopers in TFA w/o any hint of hesitation, so I’d ideally like to give him some conflicted feelings during TFA to start off with. then, I’ve always thought his plot in TLJ should’ve been focused completely on stormtroopers-- no casino, no fox-horse racing or anything. he and Rose would IMMEDIATELY sneak onto the FO ship from the beginning of the movie as undercover stormtroopers, gathering info for the Resistance and trying to shut down the FO’s tracking tech, while also feeling out the thoughts of fellow stormtroopers. maybe some troopers would be gung-ho abt the FO, while others would like to rebel but are too scared, while others still had never considered the option of rebellion until Finn planted just a little seed for them. however, by the end of TLJ, his efforts might’ve *seemed* useless, like the FO might’ve killed off any defecting stormtroopers. then we’d hit TROS, and Finn might be a bit colder, and bit more willing to kill stormtroopers, b/c even if he could convert them, he wouldn’t be able to protect them, so he might as well end it as quickly as possible. but THEN he’d meet the former stormtroopers-- not just strangers this time, but some of the troopers he’d met while on the FO ship in the previous movie! they’d escaped, and his efforts weren’t for naught! his actions still mattered, and continue to matter as everyone moves forward!

also, can I just say, fucking weird that Finn’s suddenly force-sensitive?? I’m not necessarily against him being force-sensitive, but I’m attached to the idea of an important character that doesn’t have any significant connection to the force-- he was just a talented dude! but even then, I think I’d be more open to it if not for how it was introduced. apparently, the only reason he (or any stormtrooper, as far as we know) defected is b/c the force told them to. no personal decisions based on morals or logic or even basal fear, just some “force-instinct”. that’s just.... so insulting to his character and the potential for stormtroopers, I’m reeling lmfao

Poe is an interesting case for me b/c I don’t feel any particular way abt him. like, he’s fine? but I care far more abt reylo and Finn than I do Poe, so I haven’t put as much thought into how I’d change his arcs, BUT I do have a few ideas. since I’d nix Finn’s casino trip in TLJ, I’d have Poe kinda take the helm of that-- rather than a slow crawl thru space on low fuel, the Resistance’s problem would be their space-jumping tech (+ the FO tracking them of course), so they’d have plenty of fuel to jump, but for some reason they’d have to recharge or re-fix something after each jump? so it’s more like a lil space roadtrip for Poe’s plot, where he’s jumping the Resistance to different planets, hiding their ships somewhere before the FO catches on, and waiting until the can jump again to the next hiding spot. all the while, Poe’s keeping in touch w/ Finn, trying to keep the FO off their tails for just a little bit longer, or gathering info on their plans. I rly liked Poe’s TLJ arc of, “sacrificing a few for the cause is actually kinda shitty,” so I’d like to keep that, like maybe he makes a few risky decisions while running? and then later, when Finn tries to sacrifice himself to the FO’s canon (in this case b/c he thinks his efforts w/ the stormtroopers didn’t work, so maybe he can do just this one thing--), Poe’s like Oh Fuck No and smacks him outta the sky. so Poe has this moment like, “wow, perhaps I’m not as ok w/ all this sacrifice as I thought? also I might have a crush?😳” and then in TROS he’s coming to terms w/ his crush on Finn (and Zorii’s like, *nudges* “OH-HO??~”), but Finn’s still a bit broken up over how everything w/ the stormtroopers turned out in TLJ, so he’s been difficult to connect to. then when Finn meets the former stormtroopers, he gains back some of that confidence in connecting to others, and he finally *sees* Poe for the first time in a while and it’s all romantic and junk heheh

tbh I don’t actually feel particularly strongly abt finnpoe as a pairing, BUT I rly like the potential it has for Finn and Poe’s respective character arcs, and especially how it could so lovingly tie into TROS’ theme of, “we are only as strong as we are together, and together we can beat this.” unfortunately, that theme in and of itself is also kinda awkward coming on the heels of TLJ, where the Resistance was abandoned by the galaxy when there was only a small fleet of FO forces to deal with, yet the galaxy comes to aid when there’s a fuckin billion FO ships w/ PLANET-DESTROYING TECH on-board each?? I know the 2nd movie’s supposed to be a low point, but the huge turn-around in TROS just doesn’t make a whole lotta sense to me, and I don’t know how to fix that one lmao

Rose is.... a difficult one. I rly want to like her b/c I love Kelly and she has cute moments, but TLJ already didn’t give her a lot to work with, and she had insultingly little to do in TROS. I think that perhaps she’d work well as Poe’s thematic foil in TLJ? Rose’s sister was one of the ones sacrificed under Poe’s direction, so she prolly wouldn’t be too pleased w/ that, and would bring up counterpoints to Poe’s risky maneuvers w/ the Resistance whenever they check in w/ him. then when Poe goes to rescue Finn from the canon, Rose’s words are what play thru his head. for TROS, I’d gladly replace C3PO or Chewie (or both) w/ her, lmao. I can’t necessarily think of an arc for her, but TROS was already juggling so many anyways, I think it would’ve been fine for her to maybe be a lynch-pin for the squad-- someone trying to hold everyone together through these dire circumstances, but everything starts to fall apart... until some significant moment where she helps pull everyone back together, thus completing the theme of the film. also I would’ve felt FAR more distressed if it was Rose that was supposedly on the destroyed transport ship (tho that scene was already kinda stupid like... why couldn’t Rey sense that Chewie wasn’t on there... hm..)

the Hux betrayal was obvious even from as far back as TFA, but it was weird he was replaced by a nobody we never met before and don’t care abt lmfao. I mean I don’t rly care for Hux at all, but I care even less for this stranger who has no personality lmfao

[soflsms]

   ( sorry  I'm  late  to  the  party  im  in  pst  so  i  was  at  work  til  now  sdkfjl )  ANYWHO  hi  pals  what  the  h*ck  is  up  !!  im  chloe  ,  im  21  ,  i  use  she / her  pronouns  &  im  a  broke  a$$  geography  major  !!   i  am  SO  excited  to  be  her  &  get  to  rp  with  all  y’all  bc  judging  by  your  apps  skdflj  i  fuck  with  u  all  .  anywho  ill  stop  my  rambling  ,  below  the  readmore  is  stuff  about  sofie  &  some  wcs !!  

trigger  warning  !!  sex  work  ,  deportation  ,  neglect  ,  bad  writing  ,  alcoholism  &  substance  abuse

HAILEY BALDWIN  /  SHE/HER  /  TWENTY TWO  /  BILLIE EILISH VC

welcome to los angeles , sofie almeda ! the glitterati has been watching you . rumour has it you made your first mark in the industry two years ago & that your net worth currently stands at  8m . it seems as though you’re enjoying being a  singer since relocating from  harlem , new york city . some might say you’d be a good fit for the glitterati due to your hollywood ranking being a solid  #3, & it helps that fans speak so highly of your  individualistic & assiduous ways . unfortunately , our sources cite that those closest to you aren’t particularly impressed with your  self-destructive & choleric tendencies .

stats

name  :   sofie sydney almeda

nicknames  :   sof

age  :  twenty - two  .

birthday  :  december  eleventh  .

zodiac  :  sagittarius  .

gender  :  cisfemale  (  though  doesn’t  vibe  with  the  idea  of  being  STRICTLY  a  WoMaN  ,  she  finds  labels  restrictive  )  .

pronouns  :  she    &    her  .

height  :  5 ′ 6 ″  .

hometown  :    recife  ,  brazil  &  harlem  ,  new  york  city  .

nationality  :  american  ,  brazilian  .

ethnicity  :  english  ,  portuguese   .

label(s)  :  the  venereal  ,  the  bellwether  ,  the  opulent  ,   the  anaxiphile   .

occupation  :  singer  (  vc  billie  eilish  )  .  

quirks  :  fidgeting  ,  allergic  to  shellfish  ,  walks  quickly  ,  cracks  knuckles  ,  always  wears  her  lucky  ‘  st  christopher  ’  necklace  from  her  grandmother  ,  has  a  weird  ability  to  talk  herself  out  of  trouble  ,  can  tie  a  cherry  stem  in  her  mouth  ,  messy  emotionally  but  on - point  physically  ,  vvv  bad  driver  ,  loves  a  good  theme  party  ,  can’t  get  through  the  day  without  multiple  cups  of  coffee  ,  refuses  to  wear  glasses  in  public  even  though  she’s  quite  far - sighted  ,  always  carries  hand  sanitizer ,  prefers  rain  over  sunshine  .

background

         her  mother  ,  marcia  almeda  ,  was  a  recent  graduate  from  secondary  school  who  packed  a  backpack  and  went  traveling !! before  long  tho  she  ended  up  knocked  up  by  another  backpacker  ,  this  one  american  ,  while  they  were  having  a  fling  in  sydney  (  hence  sofie’s  middle  name  lmao  @  her  mom’s  humor  )  .  she  flew  back  home  when  she  found  out  &  never  told  sofie’s  father  oops !! so  marcia  had  sofie  at  home  in  recife  just  before  her  nineteenth  birthday  ,  and  marcia  was  enthralled  w  little  sofie  .  ofc  she  inherited  her  mother’s  beauty  (  i  hc  marcia  looks  like  alessandra  ambrosio  bc  hello !  )  &  little  sofie  lived  a  happy  early  childhood  life  in  her  grandparents’  home  in  recife.

         brazil  isn’t  the  safest  of  countries  &  marcia  didn’t  want  the  same  dangers  she  experienced  growing  up  for  her  young  daughter  ,  so  around  sofie’s  eighth  birthday  ,  her  &  her  mother  packed  up  and  went  on  a  ‘ trip  ’  to  new  york  city  .  joke’s  on  sofie  ,  though  -  it  wasn’t  actually  a  trip  ,  but  rly  they  were  trying  to  move  there  to  find  sofie’s  father  to  confirm  his  paternity  and  get  sofie  american  citizenship  .  it  was  proving  more  difficult  than  she  thought  ,  &  marcia  was  quickly  running  out  of  money  .  with  a  face  like  hers  ,  though  ,  making  money  wasn’t  too  difficult  ,  but  it  was  time  consuming  .  marcia  found  herself  escorting  older  men  in  order  to  pay  the  bills  ,  all  the  while  leaving  little  sofie  to  fend  for  herself  .  some  of  her  earliest  memories  are  of  strange  men  in  their  tiny  apartment  &  sofie  trying  to  block  out  their  conversations  with  her  lil  cassette  player  hiding  in  the  corner  of  her  room  .  eventually  ,  marcia  was  able  to  contact  the  father  &  they  set  up  a  meeting  .  sofie  had  gotten  her  hopes  up  that  she  would  finally  have  a  dad  (  she  got  dressed  up  in  her  sunday  best  &  everything  bc  reuniting  her  dad  was  a  BIG  deal  ) ,  but  the  meeting  ended  up  being  a  quick  exchange  of  words  ,  a  mouth  swab  and  a  couple  signatures  .  sofie  never  even  learned  his  name  ,  & this  queued  up  a  lifetime  of  daddy  issues  &  distrust  of  men  !!

        while  marcia  was  able  to  stay  in  america  much  longer  than  she  was  legally  supposed  to  ,  eventually  she  was  facing  deportation  ,  which  meant  lil  sofie  ,  with  her  citizenship  finally  confirmed  ,  was  put  into  the  hands  of  her  father  who  sent  off  to  an  american  boarding  school  in  new  york  without  even  contacting  her  .  she  would  spend  the  summers  in  brazil  with  her  mother  or  ,  as  she  got  older  ,  couch - surfing  with  different  friends  throughout  the  months  .  she  started  growing  apart  from  her  mother  as  she  aged  since  she  wasn’t  going  home  every  summer  since  she  didn’t  rly  feel  any  connection  to  brazil  .  her  grandfather  had  passed  away  &  she  only  has  faint  memories  grandmother  ,  plus  the  city  wasn’t  at  all  familiar  to  her  &  she  wasn’t  practicing  her  portuguese  after  her  mother  returned  to  brazil  .

         through  it  all  ,  music  was  proving  to  be  the  one  constant  in  her  life  she  could  use  to  escape  from  reality  .  she  had  never  done  any  training  or  classes  ,  but  she  just  liked  singing  along  to  whatever  was  on  the  radio  & practicing  on  her  own  .  she  also  found  a  passion  for  writing  poetry  which  she  later  would  realize  was  compatible  with  music  .  she  would  spend  HOURS  in  the  school  library  working  on  garage  band  lmfao  bc  she  couldn’t  afford  her  own  laptop  to  produce  music  &  her  dad  sent  just  enough  money  as  he  was  legally  supposed  to  .  but  she  worked  her  lil  tushy  off  &  applied  to  a  music  academy  in  nyc  &  was  rejected  the  first  year  (  DEVASTATING  when  mixed  with  her  impostor  syndrome  &  daddy  issues ) but  she  practiced  more  &  more  &  edned  up  getting  accepted  the  next  year  .  here  ,  she  worked  on  her  vocal  skills  &  music  production  ,  &  started  accumulating  her  own  music  &  selling  songs  to  music  producers  on  the  side  for  some  ca$h  money  .  

          by  the  time  she  was  16  the  state  decided  she  was  old  /  mature  enough  to  live  on  her  own  so  she  got  a  TINY  lil  studio  apartment  in  harlem  where  she’d  grown  up  with  her  mum  &  she  had  friends  who  she’d  grown  up  with  .  while  it  wasn’t  the  safest  neighbourhood  statistically  sofie  felt  safe  &  just  like  one  of  the  neighbourhood  kids  .  it  was  the  first  time  she  genuinely  felt  like  she  belonged .

        she  was  accepted  on  full  scholarship  to  nyu  & majored  in  music  composition  &  vocal  performance  where  she  started  finally  feeling  secure  in  herself  &  released  her  own  music  on  soundcloud  ,  quickly  amassing  a  following  &  becoming  an  ‘ up  &  coming ‘  artist  !!  she  was  contacted  by  a  scooter  braun  type  guy  who  was  interested  in  taking  her  on  under  his  management  so  she  dropped  out  of  uni  in  her  2nd  year  (  bc  tbh  her  grades  in  anything  other  than  her  music  classes  were  v  subpar  )  .  soon  enough  producers  wanted  to  work  with  her  &  she  was  making  enough  that  she  didn’t  have  to  sell  her  songs  which  she  hated  doing  but  had  to  pay  the  bills  u  know  .  oh  &  her  vc  is  billie  eilish  bc  ofc  shes  my  queen  go  stream  when  we  all  fall  asleep  where  do  we  go  on  spotify  u  won’t  be  disappointed  

        she  also  started  getting  into  the  partying  scene  here  yikes  !! it  was  a  method  for  her  to  numb  all  her  pain  from  her  past  &  impostor  syndrome  &  drown  all  that  out  in  pills  or  tequila  .  it  rly  wasn’t  healthy  bc  of  how  she  would  binge  for  a  weekend  then  try  to  stay  sober  throughout  the  week  but  failing  by  about  wednesday when  she  started  to  feel  hollow  .  she  wasn’t  gonna  be  a  one  hit  wonder  &  her  mom  sure   as  hell  didn’t  go  through  all  that  trouble  just  for  sofie  to  be  a  nobody  addict  !! so  she  kept  it  together  enough  to  start  making big  bucks  & well  …….  here  she  is  :~)

personality

        sofie  blames  it  on  her  brazilian  heritage  but  this  bitch  loves  a  party  !!  like  shes  the  one  who  gets  happy drunk  at  the  pre  then  is  the  first  on  the  dance  floor  then  later  falls  out  of  the  club  &  into  some  rando’s  bed !!  in  the  back  of  her  mind  she  knows  her  drug  &  alcohol  use  is  self - destructive  but  she  figures  shes  allowed  to  let  loose  sometimes (  even  if  that  ends  up  being  most  nights  )  ;  rly  she’s  just  in  denial  bc  she  doesn’t  want  to  change  her  ways  &  lose  her  identity  !!

        doesn’t  put  labels  on  her  gender  identity  or  sexual orientation  .  she  finds  them  restrictive  &  useless  for  herself  ,  labels  would  only  be  to  satisfy  others  .  she  doesn’t  see  herself  as  110%  female  either  like  she’s  all about  gender  being  a  social  construct  /  a  spectrum  ;  some  days  she’ll  get  dolled  up  &  wear  heavy  makeup  &  six  inch  heels  ,  some  days  she’ll  walk  around  in  a  bun  &  tracksuit  &  trainers  .  anyone  who  asks  abt  it  will  swiftly  get  2  middle  fingers  in  their  face  !! shes  uncontrollable  i  swear

         puts  up  a  tough  bad - ass  front  like  billie  does aksjdh  like  nah  nothing  can  hurt  me  im  bulletproof  !!  but  is  rly  just  kinda  broken  underneath  .  she  doesn’t  even  let  her  closest  friends  know  how  hurting  she  is  bc  she  doesn’t  wanna  burden  them  .  she  rly  uses  mmusic  as  an  outlet  tho  so  she’ll  act  totally  tough  then   go  to  the  studio  &  record  all  about  her  heartache  .  will  NEVER  let  someone  see  her  cry  no  matter  how  close  she  is  with  them  .  she  rly  sees  it  as  a  sign  of  weakness  &  shes  in  a  much  better  place  than  she  was  5  years  ago  so  she  figures  she’s  not  ALLOWED  to  feel  anything  but  grateful  .  

         this  bitch  overthinks  everything  !! half  the  time  she  isn’t  rly  listenning  to  whoever  bc  she’s  thinking  about  what  they  just  said  &  if  they’re  mad  with  her  .  she’s  that  friend  who  will  ask  u  to  come  over  to  formulate  the  perfect  text  response  &   fuss  over  it  for  hours  .  that  being  said  ,  if  someone  talks  shit  abt  anyone  shes  tight  with  ,  they’re  gonna  get  it  the  next  time   she  sees  them  .  she  isn’t  about  violence  &  would  never  get  into  a  physical  fight  ,  but  she’d  work  behind  the  scenes  to  ruin  their  life  .  but  then  she  pretends  like  she  rly  doesn’t  care  though  its  obvious  to  those  close  to  her  that  she  cares  way  too  much

has  a  very  hard  time  expressing  love  bc  she  didn’t  have  much  practice  w  it  growing  up  .  she  was  on  her  own  most  of  her  young  life  so  even  if  her  mom  would  tell  her   te  amo  she  would  be  like  uh  huh  gtg  bye !!  

tldr ;  poor  bitch  w  abandonment  issues  who  was  able  to  get  out  of  it  by  channeling  her  energy  into  music  &  numbing  the  stress  with  pills  or  alcohol  which  she  def  still overuses  but  she  doesn’t  think its  a  problem  !! yikeroony  !!  loves  partying  & having  a  good  time  ,  puts  up  a  tough  front  but  is  rly  soft  underneath  .

wanted (* = mw)

friends  from  high  school  !! -  people  sof  stayed  with  in  the  summer  bc  she  wasn’t  going  home  to  brazil  .  

friends  from  music  school  !!  -  she  def  felt  like  an  outsider  among  the  music  prodigies  at  this  school  ,  &  maybe  this  person  was  one  of  the  ppl  she  actually  connected  with  . 

come  out  &  play  !!  this  person  acts  as  a  good  influence  to  sofie  .  they’re  level - headed  &  very  grounding  ,  &  sofie  doesn’t  let  it  show  but  they’re  really  important  to  her  .  this  is  the  Softest  billie  song  (  prob  bc  it  was  for  an  ad skdj )  &  they  inspired  it  bc  it’s  how  she  feels  when  shes with  them  .  they  encourage  her  to  be  all  that  she  can  be  &  they  believe  in  her  ,  &  they’re  prob  the  one  person  sofie  trusts  the  most  which  is  SAYING  something  !!

*exes  on  bad  terms  !!  -   ok  this  would  basically  be  based  on  all  the  songs  billie  has  about  a  failed  relationship  /  heartbreak  !! shes  got  a  bunch  .  im  thnking  maybe  she  was  actually  rly  into  them  but  had  a  hard  time  expressing  it  bc  she’s never  been  good  with  emotional  expression  ,  &  it  led  to  the  relationship  feeling ?? unfaithful  /  disconnected  ??  idk  but  she  rly  loved  them  &  is  still  nursing  that  heartbreak  .  (  x  ,  x  ,  x  )

the  paris  to  her  nicole  !!  -  ok  i  f*cking  hate  that  i  said  this  but  she’s  nicole  richie  its  true  !! she  needs  a  messy  gal  pal  exactly  like  how  paris  &  nicole  are  i  stan  them  (  x  ,  x  ,  x  )

roommate  !!  -  bc  of  her  abandonment  issues  she  rly  doesn’t  like  living  alone  so  prob  is  the  roomie  who  will  sleep  in  their  bed  from  time  to  time  bc  she  doesn’t  like  being  totally  alone  .  

*when  the  party’s  over  !!  - these  two have  been  hooking  up  for  a  while  no  strings  attached  but  recently  feelings  have  been  caught  !! &  now  they  still  hook  up  quite  often  but  sofie’s  kinda  harboring  feelings &  pretending  all  is  well  but  she  rly  hopes  they’ll  just  stay  the  night  from  time  to  time  ,  &  gets  secretly  heartbroken  when  she  sees  them  flirting  or  leaving  with  someone  else  . they  can  also  have  feelings  if  u  want  that  angst :~)

fwb  !!  -  sofie  is  pretty  transparent  when  it  comes  to  what  she  wants  &  she’s  got  a  bad  habit  of  replacing  dealing  with  problems  with  getting  laid  !! like  u  know  in  movies  when  the  man  opens  his  wallet  and  a  row  of  like  20  pictures  of  different  women  fall  out  ??  that’s  sof’s  aesthetic  .  she’s  got  a  bunch  of  fwb  of  all  genders  so  bring  me  some  pls

***mutual  dislike  /  copycat  !!  self - explanatory  ,  sofie  thinks  this  person  is  copying  her  in  everything  she  does  &  thinks  its  annoying  af  so  she  wrote  a  song  abt  it  &  hopes  they  indirectly  get  the  message  even  if  she  drops  not  so  subtle  hints  .  skfldjh  itd  be  messy  pls !!

party  buddies  !!  -  someone  who  encourages  sofies  wild  ways  .  when  the  two  get  together  its  usually  to  get  drunk  or  high  &  thats  the  way  they  like  it  .  sofie  doesn’t  feel  judged  by  them  as  she  does  by  others  who  don’t  get  obliterated  at  every  social  event  (  what  an  idea  !!  )  so  she  rly  values  them  ,  even  if  she  doesn’t  express  it

 ** 8 !! - someone  who  kinda  reluctantly  got  into  a  relationship  with  sofie  out  of  maybe  a  desire  to  save  her  from  herself  ??  like  u  know  that  good  girl  bad  boy  trope  where  the  girl  tries  to  save  the  boy  from  whatever  he’s  struggling  with  ?  that’s  them  but  the  roles  are  just  reversed  -  good  guy  ,  bad  girl  .  it  was  kinda  just  filled  w  her  being  self - destructive  &  confiding  in  him  but  not  rly  reciprocating  the  care  so  he  became  kinda  distant  bc  of  it  .  tbh  she  prob  knew  he  was  too  good  for  her  but  had  a sliver  of  hope  he  wouldn’t  leave  her  even  tho  eventually  she  became  too  much  for  him  .  (  lyrics : you said, "don't treat me badly", but you said it so sadly, so I did the best I could, not thinkin' you would have left me gladly. i know you're not sorry, why should you be? 'cause who am I to be in love, when your love never is for me?” )

good influence  !! this  person  can  tell  that  her  beahvior  is  unhealthy  &  are  trying  to  gently  nudge  her  abt  it  .  she  can  tell  what  they’re  doing  but  her  addict  brain  is  telling  her  its  invasive  &  threatening  so  shes  not  the  fondest  of  this  person  ,  but  deep  down  she  really  appreciates  them

music buddies !! these  two  are  both  in  the  music  industry  &  rather  than  it  being  competitive  ,  they’ve  developed  a  friendship  from  it  & enjoy  working  together  .  

* someone  sofie  ghostwrites  for  !! for  whatever  reason  ,  this  muse  doesn’t  write  their  own  songs  & instead  pays  sofie  to  write  them  for  them  .  she  doesn’t  love  it  but  its  a  way  to  make  money  &  give  away  songs  she  doesn’t  feel  attached  to  but  are  worth  something  .  maybe  its  tense  bc  they  claim  the  songs  as  their  own  &  sofie  doesn’t  like  it  ,  this  could  be  ~escandolo~  later  !!

*** my boy ( high school bf ) !! - ok  tea  this  song  is  the  one  that  broke  her  into  the  industry  .  she  produced  it  all  herself  &  just  relased  it  to  her  soundcloud  thinking  it  wouldn’t  rly  go  anyway  but  !!  joke’s  on  yung sofie  .  essentially  he  thought  the  relationship  was  going  well  ,  she’d  met  his  family  &  they  rly  liked  her  but  !! sof  was  feeling  kinda  smothered  &  told  herself  he  was  lying &  cheating  on  her  n  shit  so  she  wrote  a  song  about  it  !! &  once  it  was  starting  to  get  attention  he  was  like  ….. uhhh  what  the  fuck  & she  was  like  haha  sorry  !! so  they  broke  up  &  ever  since  its  been  animosity ,  but  she  realizes  she  fucked  up  but  it  launched  her  career  so  she  doesn’t  know  whether  to  keep  up  the  idgaf  i  hurt  you  or  apologize  .  

* ex - friends  !!  ok  pls  i  have  this  hc  where  sofie  got  way  too  high  one  night  &  slept  with  this  person’s  dad  or  sibling  or  smth !!  u  know  that  line  in  ‘ bad guy ’  where  she  goes  ‘ might  seduce  your  dad  type  ? ’  ya  that’s  got  sofie  written  ALL  over  it  !!   &  now  they’re  not  friends  bc  sofie  can’t  keep  it  in  her  pants  but  both  sides  kinda  misses  the  other  but  are  too  stubborn  to  say  anything  :~(

exes from college / high school  !!  - ok honestly i just love all the exes plots . gimme someone who like maybe they were hooking up & decided to give it a shot dating & it worked for a while but ultimately fell apart bc of sof’s inability to open up. maybe theres still tension or maybe theyre friends now !!

* lovely  !!  -  i  need  a  male  voice  for  khalid’s  part  in  lovely  bc  i  need  this  song  in  my  life  bc  its  a  whole  ass   sofie  mood  ok  .  

i’ve  also  got  a  wanted  connections  tag  linked  HERE  dksfj there's  not  much  in  it  yet  but  feel  free  to  check  it  out  .  ok  i  love  y'all