#so im flipping you off personally
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You might possibly be one of the rudest ppl I've ever seen on this app. Chill the actual fuck out. Ppl are calling you out for being rude, and all you do is cuss them out and make fun of them. Also, men dni?? Srsly?? Wtf kind of person secluded literally like 50% of ppl from interacting with their blog. I saw a post of yours cause I like Arcane, but I'm sad I gotta be in the same Fandom as someone as nasty as you. Especially the "I hate children." Someone dropped u on ur head as a child, I swear... Get the stick out of your ass and maybe stop insulting people for existing.
FUCK. THEM. KIDS. like yall are the reason i can’t have fucking fun on this goddamn account anymore.
“calling you out for being rude” all bc people want to CONSTANTLY disrespect ME and not listen to MY BOUNDARIES and interact with my shit anyways when it’s NOT. FUCKIMG. FOR. THEM.
maybe people should learn what boundaries are and realize things in the world aren’t going to cater to them just bc they’re online. my shit is NOT for stupid fucking kids who cannot read a simple dni, men bc this is an account solely for horny lesbian shit, and ageless blogs bc idk how old y’all are and im not having kids on my ADULT smut posts.
so you can suck my fucking clit.
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oh mona ft. lxl shikishi how i miss you so…
#i don’t think i’ve ever mentioned it (till now) but… this is the last surviving image i have of this shikishi#idk if it vanished during the move™️ or if my mother threw it out by accident while i was quarantining in my ‘c-19 for daizo’ era#or if it just sprouted wings and flew off to become top idols one day… but it’s gone :(#im forever glad that my past self decided to use it as the profile image for the tl account bc otherwise it’d be *gone* gone#thank you past me for the courtesy… i still think ur a dumbass for not keeping the shikishi safe in the first place in a memorable location#but thank you for at least giving me a little trace to remember it by…#…anyways profile image on there is now asumona shikishi~~~~ got a cleaner pic of them while i was cleaning out the drawer so~~~~~#my miserable shikishi bonus count remains at 2… sighssss#missed out on vol 1 bc i bought from am.jp like a dumbass instead of checking for bonuses… vol 2’s vanished… and vol 3’s just didnt arrive#(which. incidentally. is also. like. a cautionary tale of why u should wait for bonus announcements before placing preorders…)#(<-was dumb enough to preorder vol 3 the moment it went up [note: before the bonus announcements] and was shocked to receive no bonuses)#(idk if it was just a one time thing but i’d rather not risk it y’know~~~~~~ proxy fees add up~~~~~~)#im just glad that i could buy vol 4 at ani.mate in-person (by chance)… though it did make my family think i had bought bl manga instead…#…anyway that’s enough 4-5 am babbling for one day…#throwing this ‘promise’ here: if i can get up by 1pm im finally gonna clean the rest of the idolsengen chapters… no more procrastinating…#perhaps. maybe. idk. no guarantee.#either way nghy canon u agree y/y#<-cant stop shillin’ nghy (sorry <3)#t h o u g h speaking of nghy i found. like. 6 nghy stickers in my drawer (the one from the 4th charasong album kuji)#so i trimmed the cheki-esque borders off one of ‘em and now it’s sitting nicely in one of the card slots of my phone case~~~#cute lil’ portable nghy that i can just flip up to look at whenever i want~~~~~~~
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THE ORDER OF PALMS An order of holy folk that serve The Helm, working to create powerful Aasimar Paladins for the purpose of protecting any who hire their help. [BACKSTORY UNDER CUT]
One day, Gjör and her peers were lead by their mentor Opheria, to a mission far from their home. On the peak of that mountain village, they saw upon the horizon, the castle of their home go up in flames. Horrified and scared, the apprentices sought to follow their mentors guidance, and followed her lead into a small barn. It was there, that Opheria proceeded to slaughter each and everyone of the apprentices. It seemed she somehow had a hand in this sudden attack on the Order of Palms. Gjör D'annevual survived a sword through the 'heart', on account of a rare condition, that places her heart on the other side of her chest. When she finally managed to bring herself back home, the Order was insulted by her survival. She had so many better peers, why couldn't any of them have survived? This runt was seriously the only thing that survived Opherias wrath? It was better to just wash their hands clean of this. Thus the Order decided to banish Gjör from their ranks. She now travels the land in search of a purpose.
#luckys original content#dungeons and dragons#MY OCSSSS MY WONDERFUL OCSSS ITS BEEN SO LONGGGG!!this is a fairly old character that i made foreeeever ago#i was trying to go full on into DND LORE ONLY instead of makin up my own stuff. so when i was lookin around i learned abt THE HELM#the god of protection or watever it was. i also like playing paladin bc i love to hit things w my sword. i also like aasimars bc theyrprett#im sure i ahd other Min Maxy reasons for her but i dont have her sheet n ive forgotten everything. never got a chance to play her but yknow#maybe someday. I LIKE HER ALOT TOO. big and strong and well meaning but a lil dumb. justa lil dense n stupid. but she tries!!#I LIKE CHARACTERS THAT HAVE JUST SMALL THINGS DIFERENT ABT THEM. i knew some1 who had that condition. where everythings just flipped#aint that fucked up? that ur organs can just be flipped? and inever see it in fiction. its so neat. imagine finding out like THIS too#she had blacked out from the sword through the heart. the last thing she heard from her mentor was;#'you were a great student. that is why you above all else must die. i hope you understand' spoken through a gentle voice and a gentle smile#the very same that had guided Gjör so far through her journey.A BETRAYAL LIKE NO OTHER! she awoke utop a pile of comrades#each bloodied and dead and cold. she used her own magic to heal herself. to catch herself from the precipice of bleeding out#when she stepped out of the barn she had found that the village was burned to the ground#she was shellshocked!! it took her weeks to limp all the way back down that mountain. all the way back to the place she called home#only to be spit on and kicked back out. being a Paladin of the Palms was her entire life. what was she to do now?#OH SO THE ART. I RLY LIKE HER DESIGN.heavily based off of THE BABY SITTER from HALO LEGENDS. i fuckin love halo so much guys.....#i just love that trope of Big Strong Person in Armor that we all thought wasa fullgrown MAN takes off the helmet to revel shesa PRETTY GIRL#my favorite in the WORLD!! i also like the silly frilly pretty dress sorta motif in gjors armor. it hides all the stuff i dont wanna draw#thats all the ramble i got in me for now. PLEASE ENJOY. and ask me abt my ocs
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Bit of a (late) long-ass personal post, but this past year has been insanely monumental for me and a lot of it, if not almost all of it, was centered around this silly comedy show.
Starting the year adopting the most perfect cat in the world purely because he looked like Agent Jack Bauer, I've ended up meeting amazing people and making great friendships, both online and in person, I met Glenn and Charlie and MEE and Meg (and Humphrey) and Danny?? got my first tattoo, bought way too much whiskey, and I've just really, genuinely enjoyed my time posting on Tumblr, making shit, and writing fic more than I have in half a decade. It's stupid, and sappy, and probably pretty parasocial, but I owe so many of my best experiences this past year not only to the show, but to joining this community. Because I wouldn't have experienced much of any of this if I hadn't jumped the casual fan on r/IASIP ship and washed up ashore here. And being here has improved my life and my mental health in ways I can't even begin to properly express.
So here's a photo dump of what I have to dub "A Very Sunny 2023":
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To everyone here, thank you for being a part of my 2023. I'm not sure what 2024 has in store, but I'm happy I'll be here, creating and experiencing whatever it is, through and beyond.
#personal#sunny 2023#sunnyblr#sorry to be really annoying but yk#this is my blog and i like to use it to document things#and this is the best format for this kinda thing :) so excuse me#this has been a crazy year when i look at it all#i had a shortlist of photos for this post and it ended up 72 photos#lmfao like damn.. gotta be selective STILL#the expansion of my sunny wall is like poetic you see#again im sorry i think thisi s probably peak absolute insanity to most ppl who follow me#but so much shit happened i wouldnt have dreamed of#like crazy insane wow i still cant believe this was all real#glenn flipping me off remains my favourite thing to have captured#i love that stupid video it makes me go crazyyyy#but yes obviously top moment goes to charlie calling me out in the audience about the tattoo. then finding out he told mee about it#again thank you. like. i straight up owe all of this to sunnyblr existing#if it didnt i would just. not have been this deep and able to meet people and experience all of this
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hi more drug question
I have been told many many times that using ecstasy will basically fry your seratonin receptors so that you will never be able to feel happy again unless you are using the drug. I am assuming now that this is false but I am curious now as to how false. Is it something that CAN happen if you take too much at once or too often, or is this just random Drug Scary misinformation
Also also since wellbutrin is not an SSRI does LSD work when you are on it or does it also cancel it out
lol that's kind of an extreme version of what I usually hear! you're right that basically the answer here is no. this comes from a couple different things. first is MDMA induced serotonin toxicity, and 2nd is something called "serotonin syndrome" which is a real thing that can happen, but it's really really hard to get like this. prepare for a very long answer lmfaooo
MDMA induced serotonin toxicity occurs when you take too high doses too frequently. MDMA IS slightly neurotoxic, but so are many prescription drugs so don't let that word freak you out too much! basically MDMA works by dumping large amounts of serotonin into your brain, hence why it's the happy/love drug lol. if you take too much too often, your brain will straight up run out of serotonin. obviously that's bad! it's not as simple as "never feeling happy again" but you will essentially have depression for a bit because of lack of serotonin (on its own, low serotonin levels following modest MDMA use is not damaging and resolves within a few days) but the real problem is that if you are on MDMA with depleted serotonin, your brain will continue releasing dopamine which will attach to the serotonin receptors and damage them. this is what can cause long term depression symptoms, the damaged serotonin receptors. ultimately your brain will heal this on its own unless for some reason I guess you keep taking it a lot (which would have no effect. when you take too much MDMA your brain just runs out of serotonin to dump so like. it just won't work lol)?? it can also be treated with the supplement NAC, which I would recommend taking any time you use MDMA because of this!
to sum up MDMA toxicity: it can happen but only if you're misusing it! it's generally recommended that you dont do much more than 1 dose every 3 months or so to make sure your brain has time to reset. research interactions with anything else you're using (prescription or not), take some NAC in the weeks following a dose, drink a lot of water, keep your body temperature regular because that can worsen it, and take some antioxidants like alpha lipoic acid and grape seed oil during/immediately after taking MDMA - it's when you come down that your brain is delicate and could use the protection. also this may sound counterintuitive but weed also has antioxidant properties, so smoking it as you come down helps a lot. also if you DO have MDMA toxicity taking more MDMA will not help u feel happy unfortunately it will just make it worse lol, your brain only has so much serotonin to give
now serotonin syndrome can happen with the misuse of any drug that works on serotonin including MAOIs, SSRIs, and SNRIs, usually by taking a VERY large dose (but some people are just extremely sensitive). it usually takes care of itself eventually, but the amount of time it takes and stuff is kinda hard to pin down bc it's REALLY misunderstood and tends to be overly self diagnosed. again this is like super super hard to do. you would have to take a MASSIVE dose or mix it with other serotonin affecting drugs (ESPECIALLY MAOIs. DO NOT MIX MDMA WITH MAOI ANTI DEPRESSANTS). like 5 times the normal dose at least probably (partner is currently trying to find some literature on it so he'll add that in the replies if he finds anything interesting). it will cause things like heightened anxiety and body temperature and can cause kidney problems or seizures if it's like really bad and untreated. but you'd feel REALLY bad before it got to that point, so in general like, if you take any type of drug and feel extremely bad after go to the doctor lol. mostly this will also just heal itself; your brain is pretty resilient! again usually if this does happen it's very minor. cases bad enough to require hospitalization are exceedingly rare
to give you an example of what these can look like, I have a friend who was given about 3-4 times a regular dose by a fucking piece of shit asshole she knows and, this part is crucial, it was mixed with a very large amount of alcohol AND acid (which can slightly increase the neurotoxicity. normally not a huge issue but becomes one in circumstances like this), AND coke; like she was blackout drunk and while not on a lot of acid or coke, this is just too many things to have in your body and brain at one time. the mixture of such a large amount different drugs caused her what I'm guessing was a mild case of both of these things at once. she experienced slightly worsened depression for about 6 months after, and actually had a mild stutter for almost a year. I made sure she took some NAC and other things that aid brain healing, and she didn't try molly again for a long time to be super sure she didn't overload her brain before it was ready. this is a pretty extreme case, and even with that she has fully recovered thankfully. do NOT EVER do drugs with someone you don't trust with your life. DO NOT EVER do drugs in doses you have not confirmed for yourself to be safe and DO NOT EVER mix drugs without finding out if it's safe!!! just as a small aside though: usually taking molly and acid at the same time is perfectly safe. in fact it's called a candy flip and I HIGHLY recommend it because it's fucking awesome. again, just make sure you are taking safe doses in a safe environment
OKAY now finally your specific question about Wellbutrin: I actually take Wellbutrin so I can answer this one from personal experience! Wellbutrin should not alter the effects of LSD in any way HOWEVER! both of these drugs lower your seizure threshold! I'm on the max dose of Wellbutrin (which is the max dose BECAUSE of seizure risk) so when I plan to drop acid I usually either skip my dose entirely that day or only take half depending on how much acid I'm planning to take. because of the way Wellbutrin works, this shouldn't cause you any problems as far as that goes. for me, not taking my Wellbutrin for a day mainly has the effect of making me more fatigued, and acid counteracts that really well by making me feel very awake/aware. if you don't want to skip or halve your dose though you can also take things that will RAISE your seizure threshold. so like I sometimes will smoke hemp because CBD actually will help with that. the risk here isn't huge either way especially if you have no history of seizures, but again if it's something you're concerned about you should be just fine skipping or lowering your dose for the day. acid usually lasts about 12 hours too so i personally don't even care about skipping the Wellbutrin that much because it basically does the same thing for me. I did take my full Wellbutrin dose the last couple times I've done acid though because I was taking a very small amount of acid (about half a tab)
in summation lol sort of TLDR I generally would recommend MDMA for recreational use because the risks of damage are low and it's safe if you are safe about it. and it's honestly just a really fun one! the only negative effect I've ever felt is some emotional and physical fatigue the following day, and this is largely because of how emotional and energetic you are on it. I just make sure to have the next day off to lay around and listen to music :)
taking it with a partner or loved one will give you an especially beautiful experience, as MDMA has been proven to facilitate extremely open emotional conversations. in fact, when MDMA was first synthesized it's primary use was in psychotherapy! research was shut down during the war on drugs, but in recent studies it's demonstrated amazing abilities to treat and even straight up CURE disorders like PTSD. for a personal anecdote, my partner actually completely fucking cured his alcoholism on a combo of MDMA and whippets (nitrous oxide) lmfao. like dude straight up went from getting black out drunk multiple nights a week to drinking nothing for the past year and a half without any other treatment program. LSD has been proven to have similar incredible results with treating and curing things like depression, anxiety, PTSD and addiction and is also a very fun and very safe one.
sorry to reiterate for the billionth time lol but it's important: these drugs are safe and fun if you make sure they're safe and fun! do your research and never use in an unfamiliar environment with people you wouldn't trust in an emergency! also I know this sounds like a lot, but remember I'm giving you like the absolute safest possible practices and emphasizing sort of over cautiousness because I think it's always better to be too safe. I've taken molly without nac and I've taken kinda big doses a little closer together than I should have without any problems. there's a bit of flexibility to these guidelines, but it's always better to think of them as being rigid so you don't end up too far in the other direction. like I've said it's really really hard to do actual damage that would last more than like a day or 2 max. most of the time you'll just be sleepy the next day from all the dancing so it's nice to do it on a day 1 of a weekend. also it only lasts like a couple of hours lol so it's not your whole day or anything!
#sorry this took me like a fucking hour i kept having to check myself w my partner + google to make sure i wasnt talking out of my ass lmfao#im sure ill be rereading and editing it for the next hour as well#damn just spent like another half hour#hope this is thorough enough for ya ajdbsjhdkshdkshs#on a tangentially related note: ive been weaning myself off of my SNRI (venlafaxine/effexor) bc it didnt help at all#and made my nails extremely brittle ????? like so bad they were constantly breaking to the quick and making me bleed#so pretty soon ill be able to do acid and molly again. sweet blessed molly how ive missed you#cant believe i forgot to mention this but as another personal mdma anecdote: my partner and i started dating while candy flipping#hed been staying at my house for like 4 months at that point but we hadnt really talked about like. relationship definitions#and I was EXTREMELY nervous bc id never even like kissed someone fr before him#but the acid and ESPECIALLY the molly made talking about our feelings with each other really easy and safe feeling#we do it every once in a while as like a poor mans couples therapy lmfao. its much easier to be open and honest and vulnerable#while crucially taking down the defensive wall that can cause you to lash out and stuff#highly recommend 👍#wtiting a book called the couple that rolls together stays together. its about doing molly but also skateboarding#drug ed#i cant stop adding to this post im sorry
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should i start collecting porcelain barbies
#me whenever i remember porcelain barbies exist#30th anni midge is so cute are you kidding me...#i wish the only redheaded barbie from the porcelain treasures line wasn't plantation belle#bc that means if i want a redhaired porcelain barbie from the 90s i have to get one called plantation belle#torn... but i for sure want midge 🖤🖤 im in love w her#remember when they reproduced midge for her 60th anni in silkstone but they just kept her with her original basic swimsuit look >:(#way to piss me off. personally#they al-READY reproduced swimsuit midge. they shouldve done something special for a 60th anniversary!!#the original design on the 55th anniversary christie doll is the kinda thing midge deserved too. a tribute!#me when i have a million barbie doll opinions cuz im me#tales from diana#i can talk about old barbies with the same passion as i talk about shakespeare and i can flip back and forth between those topics#because to me they are the same. my Beautiful Sweet Obsessions#i want them to fill my life
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being jewish with zero affiliation to israel and rather a generational line of activists for palestine is a hard line to walk and sometimes i wish i could just fall off
#i hate zionist jews i hate i stand with israel signs in my neighborhood i hate leftists who write and speak and act like theyve never met an#actual jewish person in their life and believe that were all genocidal monsters (in spite of our own genocide which i assume will eventuall#flip around to leftist holocaust denial) i hate that people are blaming israeli civilians for the faults of their deeply corrupt government#i hate that i cant say zionism is inherently antsemitic without getting fucking maimed i fucking hate it here the world is on fire just#fucking let me burn#anyways#sorry#free palestine#any other#jumblr#girlies (gn) relating to my vent#bc im started to feel ashamed of myself my culture and my people#and its such a fucking shitty feeling#like i can barely look in palestine / gaza / etc. tag without seeing blindingly blatant antisemitism coming from left right and center#like just say you hate jews and fuck off#i cant look at this shit anymore fuck#idk why im so worked up about this rn i just. btwn weeding out all the zionist blogs i didnt know i followed and just being so fucking-#and weeding out all the antisemitic leftist blogs i didnt know i was supporting its all just crashing down#im so fucking tired#and im so fucking tired of having to defend myself any time i talk about the jewish experience in any of this#and im so fucking tired of people equating judaism with religion only#and im so fucking tired of the double standard of also equating with only one race#like there arent jews of every race#the reason you cant see any of this shit is because nearly a century later were still dealing with the aftermath of the 6mil person murder#were always at the cross roads of some ridiculous double standard or the scapegoat for when things are going badly#like fuck i just#dont want to have this fucking identity anymore it makes me a walking talking breathing living fucking target#idk what to do I'm just#desolate
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oh
#oh em gee he looks so exquisite#they are all going to fashion week or something i thought there was only one fashion week why are there 20#okay i literally didn't think that#i just didn't realize there were so many fashion weeks#YOU ARE NOT GOING TO PARIS!!!!!!!#anyway need to stop by and make my monthly jun or joshua post to confirm i am alive#school is definitely schooling#i'm nervous for my molecular bio lab bc it's one continuous experiment until the end of the semester so#if you fuck up the mistake follows you and i was like Oh.#i rly love my prof for molecular bio but the class pisses me off so bad omfg#he's sooo nice and accommodating and he does his best to explain everything as simple as possible#but whenever someone asks a question during the lecture everyone else takes it as a cue to start talking#THIS IS NOT PERSONAL CONVERSATION TIME!!! WHY ARE YOU NOT EVEN WHISPERING??#these girls behind my friend and i were legit talking at normal volume i wanted to turn around and slam my#shitty wooden flip-out table over their heads#okay that sounds rly violent and awful but like OH MY GOD it's so disrespectful and rude!!!!!!!!!!#and the thing is he's too nice to tell the class to stfu he will just be like 'guys im having trouble hearing the question'#if i were the prof i would literally jump on the podium and scream at everyone to shut the fuck up#it's my only class that's like that#on my period and feeling overly sensitive and emotional abt everything that's prob why i'm so angry abt it#I WILL TAKE A LIGASE ENZYME AND PUT IT IN YOUR THROAT SO YOU CANNOT SPEAK AGAIN!#anyway<3
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on another note
#4-5ish months i’ve been the main (i’m pretty sure only) person cleaning every weekend#my only days off and through the week clean dishes or load up the washer and pick them up#occasionally someone else w load it but not pick up or vice verse#november i lost all motivation i ask for help i get told they’re tired or they work or later or im met w but i did xyz the other day blah bl#blah blah yk#i tried to clean in nov but i just can’t im tired it’s constant that im cleaning i want to do things not go from work to home for chores to#also cook and then clean up dinner because i also have a job#and when i do something im not like OH well i did xyz! so i won’t do that …no i just say okay because why bring up what i already did things#need to be done why are you arguing with me like we want to bring up receipts? i’ll bring them up#i’m cleaning up clothes that’s not mine i’m cleaning up shit piss ans throw up of a dog that is not mine i walk said dog occasionally#but nope not the other way around why would they do any of that when it’s not theirs ?#i ask them to pick one day to make dinner nope i can’t i’m busy i have xyz …okay i have work gym appts errands too#and since i have cleaned in like a month or over it’s a mess but no one has taken action to fix that it’s just it’s messy in here#that’s why i hate if you need help ask. .#I ASK I DONT GET HELP you ask i help but god forbid i ask#‘but you clean weird’ ‘you do a deep clean’ it’s a regular clean i clean to clean not to light dust and see it be back to how it was in a#day or two. deep clean is i’m up in a ladder cleaning the vents cleaning cabinets shelves i can’t regularly reach or are hard to get to and#honestly that should be a monthly thing#weekly is wipe down appliances. sweep swiffer vacuum and mop the floors. wipe countertops and flat surfaces. flip the chairs around tighten#bolts wash the tablecloth clean the table. vacuum the couches lint roll any cloth surfaces. clean or wipe down the stove/microwave depending#on how dirty. clean bathroom tub toilet sink floors mirror. this is not a deep clean w that you get the fridge and dishwasher windows move t#the furniture to clean under that. i am tired and i dont ever get to finish everything#bathroom stays last and weekends are only so long i also go to the gym or need to go to the store or have ot to do#and ik i brought up here that im depressed but im not bring that up to them because regardless these things need to get done be it a the#worlds slowest pace but does need to happen and i don’t want to use that as an excuse because i will just let myself lay in bed and not show#shower or move does this mentality eat away at me maybe idk but it’s what my parents gave me and it’s not changing i don’t think so here we#are.#we can wait another month and i might be on the up but ill be down again so 🤷♀️#like actually i can use a lot of things as an excuse but that doesn’t help anyone does it ?
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saw a take that peeved me in the vocaloid feed on bluesky but i don’t wanna be confrontational there + my thoughts are too powerful for a 300 character per post thread so im making it tumblr’s problem
due to my intense vsynth brainworms this is going to sound incredibly pedantic and annoying which is why i am posting it here okay here we go
the post was sort of a ‘callout’ of a creator who uses synthv for covers of fnf songs or whatever. the general body was like “they write their own lyrics but they make the vocals using ai with a program called synthesizer v” (the implication being, “this person is an ai-using fraud, don’t support them”)
if ur in the community or like have a little bit of an idea of how ai is associated with synthv specifically this is a nonsense uninformed take (the ‘ai’ training is used for autotuning/cross language synthesis/some other shit idk but the point is it’s not the type of ai that like, writes the melody/lyrics for you and is voiced from random samples from unknowing providers but i’ll get back to this later)
ai is mentioned on synthv’s website (also vocaloid’s much to the detriment of news articles that report on hatsune miku) so it’s a common misunderstanding, whatever. it would be nice if people actually looked into the ways ai works in vsynth at least a little bit but in an age where artists are on the defense against the ai boogeyman i guess i sorta understand the knee jerk reaction to assume the ai in vsynth software like synthv is the Bad kind. annoying, but nothing new.
but i think what made this post rotate in my mind to the point of crystallizing into unnecessary rage is an add-on that was like “i just prefer my music to be sung by real people!” followed by “by the way, vocaloid isn’t ai, so no you’re not bad if you like hatsune miku music”
ohhh man this actually did piss me off a little cuz wow way to really shout to the heavens that you have no damn clue what you’re talking about
firstly, i COMPLETELYYYY understand that the premise and general sound of vocal synth music is not for everyone. the computerized words, the unrealism, or even the fact that it’s not an actual person singing, like whatever that’s fine i get it. but like you can’t go around and be like “by the way vocaloid [aka hatsune miku] is chill don’t worryyyy” bc that line of thinking from my understanding doesn’t really make sense? miku isn’t a real person either 😭😭 her latest release even uses ai! (at least i think it does cuz vocaloid 6 has ai support but idk i guess that doesn’t matter) does she just get a free pass cuz she’s an internet darling?
miku is a piece of software where you write the midi for her vocals and input the lyrics so a slurry of samples recorded by saki fujita can be played back in an in-character singing voice. synthv is a piece of software with similar character voice databases where you do the same thing, write a midi and input lyrics so a database’s voice samples put it all together to sing back. the inclusion of ai in this process is to streamline the workflow for the user to automatically work out the pitch transitions between notes to save on time manually tuning, creating a more realistic playback. this ai, perhaps merely the inclusion of these two letters in the proximity of synthv’s marketing, is what makes synthv both Significantly Different and Inferior to miku.
the lack of ai with vocaloid (as far as op knew, cuz need i remind you vocaloid as of its 6th installment uses similar ai to synthv lol) making it Better than synthv sent the implication, TO ME, that op thinks that the ai used in synthv is the type that like, takes samples from other people without their permission to create the voices (then leading to the “i just want my songs sung by REAL people” aka not sung by dubiously gathered samples). i recognize this means of creating ai voices to impersonate other people and make them say things they should not without their knowledge or permission is CERTAINLY bad but like that’s not how any of this works if we’re talking synthv (you could argue this applies to those utau banks that make voicebanks for like sonic the hedgehog and shit but those usually sound like ass and are about as convincing as a sentence mixed youtube poop). maybe that’s not what they meant (i don’t wanna dig up the post cuz i don’t wanna be bothered and it’s probably gonna piss me off to the point of starting something which i don’t want) but based on my understanding of their point this is like. wholly untrue. in fact synthv voicebanks (particularly those from eclipsed sounds whose terms of service are free to read on their website) have special terms specifically designed to protect the voice providers of their databases BECAUSE of the extra realism in their voices (terms such as, “you can’t credit any voice work done with Solaria to Emma Rowley [her voice provider] or anyone else besides the software itself” in the case Solaria is used to say something objectionable and cast it on Rowley, that would be a breach of the terms and might even get your license revoked). shit like that is likely what people who are afraid of ai voices expect to happen but there were contracts signed to protect and inform the voice providers of what their vocal likeness is being used for + compensation paid to them for their work providing vocal samples SPECIFICALLY for this product. and ofc miku is the same. ITS THE SAME. BUT MIKU IS A FUNNY INTERNET MEME SO SHES FINE. GRRRRR!!!!!!
#mayor talk#IM SORRRYYY i’m so insufferable with this shit#what a 4 year consistent attachment to a niche ass music subculture does to a mf#don’t seek out op if you find the post etc etc i have fought in the internet argument trenches and im NOT doing it again#i might find the post to block them tho. nothing personal kid but you have awakened my wrath#anyway i mentioned in the post but i GET the defensiveness against the mention of ai in association with art and music#vsynth on the surface sounds like it’s perpetuating this ai rise. ‘oh i didn’t have a real person sing it i used software to do the singing#for me so i could save on hiring a vocalist’ [vocaloid being an alternative to hiring a vocalist per hour is a legitimate selling point]#i can see people who sing or do music or appreciate either bristling at that. ‘a computer sung this? hm…..’#i try to say it out loud and i feel like i’d piss people off! but as we know the difference in workload + sound makes it less black and whit#it’s just. frustrating to see people immediately assume the worst whether they’re talking about synthv or miku. :[#on the flip side it’s also annoying seeing people argue for the difference between generated ai vocals and vocaloid by saying#‘vocaloid is not only different but BETTER and MORE VALUABLE bc it’s hard to use/you have to do it yourself’#yes gen ai and vocaloid demand different workloads and learning curves but uh nooo please don’t say that#please don’t imply that art only has value or goodness depending on how much an artist suffered to make it noooooo
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actually lion king by ghosting works as an utena song
#lyrics are about a naive person demanding the truth only to be crushed by it#the process involving being the ''bride of the lion king'' (bride imagery! hello!) then DEMANDING to suffer (dueling? swords of hatred?)#and after seeing the truth (end of the world? but also just the reality of ohtori) then flips into demanding the ''head of the lion king''#if you put akio into the role of the lion king.. lol. cut his head off!#and idk. lyrics like ''you should have seen that bride- how beautiful she died'' you can bring that around to like the coffin metaphors#''and so i took her to the place she longed for. and showed her all she asked for'' like. LIKE.#''stairs she climbed they led her to the palace built for gods'' DUELING ARENA. ZETTAI UNMEI MOKUSHIROKU. CASTLE OF ETERNITY!!! DIOS.....#changing only the line ''she needs to see the things he's seen'' to the things SHE'S seen to refer to anthy instead. but it all works still#in my minds eye#im just saying im just saying. like im literally just saying#< turning goth songs into amvs in my head#rgu
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Ummmm it doesnt matter that character ages were removed from the Sonic character profiles they do still have their old canon ages and if you think that actualllyyyyy they never acted or sounded like those ages then youre a creep looking for excuses to put them in adult situations :/ Like thats child endangerment that you're depicting there??? Why do you wanna see that blorbo of yours beaten and bloodied and traumatized??? You ACTUALLY wanna beat up kids? You freak??
And why are you drawing him driving a fucking car he should not be driving a car he's a child! And STOP drawing Shadow with guns!!! Children shouldn't have those!
And while you're at it, stop drawing art of Amy working at a bakery! Like wow what a freak you actually want to break child labor laws in real life???
I know plenty of 12 year olds that own apartments and cars of their own, so I can confirm that these characters were always ALWAYS meant to be their previously listed canon ages! If you say otherwise youre a freak!
(This is Not a serious post, for the love of god)
#Personal#Am I going thru it tonight? Yes I am! Did something become the final drop that spilled the water? YES IT DIIID. AND THE FIRST THING WASNT E#EVEN RELATED TO THIS MESS#Im fucking tired im TIRED#I dont like nsfw! Guess what I do? I dont fucking look at it#I dont go digging up some VERY SERIOUS ACCUSATIONS to throw at people instead!#Fucking separate fiction from reality do you people realize that#1- You have watered down a very dangerous word that no longer means anything#Am I seeing a serious accusation of someone or am I seeing someone thats basically going 'i dont like what they draw/write' and trying to t#turn it into a moral issue? I dont know!#And guess who that fucking benefits because it sure isnt the kids?#2- Yall are one degree of separation from evangelical purists and that one degree is the name#Because guess who else goes 'THIS IS BAD FOR THE CHILDREN' and 'THESE QUEER TERMS ARE BAD' (and not im not talking about top and bottom)#Im going fucking insane I feel like in a few years this post wont even be that much of a parody#I feel like we will indeed get a repeat of 'Stop drawing these characters doing flips off buildings or running in front of trucks! The chi#The children will be inspired to do the same!' times#And people Still wont see the parallels between themselves and very very dangerous hateful people#(And no the dangerous person isn't the one drawing your NOTP or the thing that squicks you out. Perfectly tagged for you to avoid it. But y#you wont. Because you'd rather go out of your way to upset yourself then blame that person for your upset feelings#and then harass them and act like you did the world a favor (youve done nothing youve just harassed a random person))#Can we please PLEASE go back to avoiding the type of art or writing we dont wanna see#And doing so quietly instead of forever ruining someone's life#And forever ruining words that actually used to mean something and that were actually useful in pointing out dangerous people
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Sometimes if I’ve gotten done with a therapy appointment my dad will ask what we talked about and it’s like. Girl who do you think 🤨
#the klock keeps ticking#havent really done any therapy shit in a while cuz. yeah having a whole trust issues thing happening after bad experiences#but had to do a psychiatrist appointment today just cuz if i dont every once in a while i cant have meds#and yeah just makes me think how my dad has the audacity to ask that shit its like#first off even if we didnt talk about you like. why would you casually ask someone what they discussed in therapy alsjks#like this conversation can only be dark. unless he thinks idk my problems are just that stupid#also its like. personal? and every time ive been like uhhh dont ask me that i dont wanna talk about it he gets all pissy#saying that like i OWE him that information and he wants proof im trying to fix the things he deems as problems about me#which is stupid in every possible way like damn the entitlement#on the flip side my mom is really insecure shes like ‘i know youre probably talking about how much you hate me in there 😩’#liiiike. dude. get a grip#so insecure soooo insecure over the idea of looking like a bad parent but refusing to ever admit youre wrong or that your behavior is bad#so yeah obviously i need to keep these people as far away as possible with this shit
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sometimes i think about interactions boat and i have had and things he's said to/about me over the years and it makes me feel as though i must occupy some little space in his heart. like i live in his mind rent-free the way he does for me, although not nearly to the same extent lmao.
speak of the goddamn devil i just got a steam notification he's playing tf2
anyway i never thought i'd have that kind of effect on a person, much less my favorite content creator. but it sure appears to be that way, and idk. it makes me feel special. warms my heart n all that :)
#was one of two people to give me their phone number when i had to drop off of discord 2 years ago#never took advantage of it though (shy (also we have different brands of phones so texting probably wouldnt work right#other person was an irl friend (never contacted them either#i remember one time YEARS ago when he was wanting to read jjba on stream or smth like that#him: it's like REALLY not family friendly me: well i shouldnt watch bc i am a Child him: no its ok you dont have to skip It's very dirty th#like guy clearly just wanted me there bc he enjoys my company And he's said he does! i remember him saying he likes seeing me in chat#and once again he was the one that wanted me on the staff team when usually the staff pick new recruits and boat has final say#and apparently he's talked about me to his other friends. that's kinda where the old Time to Mod in-joke started#he was using voice to text to talk to whoever and said my username but the thing misinterpreted it#that coupled with the meme drawing i did that he edited so it's him just saying 'pain'. eventually that dumb fucking image spawned#and then there was the night he spammed it and spam mentioned me in chat when he was streaming while i was ASLEEP#once we were in a vc and he was like 'wow i'd forgotten what your voice sounded like' NEVER heard him say that to anyone else. What#dont even get me started with him and my artwork (man would probably flip tf out seeing what i can do now LOL)#guy literally wanted ME to design an official tff logo but at that point they were kinda slowing down so it never happened#but yeahno i just. ugh. our friendship means a lot to me. i am ITCHING to speak to him again you have no idea#and to just give him a big ol hug. been wanting that for such a long time#quite frankly a friendship dynamic like no other ive seen#dont mind me REMINISCING. im sooo sappy about him he's the most important guy in the world to me#if god exists he knew we'd be too powerful if we grew up together
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jacob and leah like "we have never met the c.ullens directly, but i think its safe to assume - and this is nothing against bella, we love bella, - that they are monstrously stupid sewer people,"
#like imo the tribes hatred of the c.ullens makes a LOT of sense#them just being there puts every human in the area in danger even with the whole vegetarian thing#not to mention that again. just being there. will often cause an irreversible often traumatic change in members of the tribe#that could have been completely avoided had they just bopped around in alaska instead of a place where they were explicitly unwanted#on the flip side? the c.ullens hatred and attitude toward them is really baffling and inexcusable#and really just feels like an excuse for smeyer to use her white self inserts to live out every racist fantasy she could think of#like the tribe basically just says 'dont kill people and stay tf off our lands' which is WAY more reasonable than they probably deserve#and theyre like 'you guys are so rude and awful for that :( im gonna dehumanize you about it'#and again. this gets personal for jacob and leah when bella gets looped into what they view as the c.ullens shit#theyre going to protect her and charlie and tentatively ally with the c.ullens in order to do so! but christ alive theyre gonna hate it#*:・゚✧*:・゚✧ small and knowing clown / ooc
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thinking
#jc’s cawing#retj thinking to be exact#its infecting my brain again tbh#not my main interest but its there#ive kinda been flipping through a bunch of different ones recently then coming back to them#its on and off all the time but anyways#thinking about old server stuff#probably one of the happiest and most depressing parts of my life#the amount of times ive laughed because of that damn server is astonishing#and then there was the horrible gut wrenching fixation#why the fuck did my brain do that?????#im never stepping foot into a server again unless someone specifically asks me to#actually yknow what im opening discord rn#jester notification jumpscare#i am NOT talking to it 😭😭🙏🙏#what in tarnation is that status bro#ROBERT SEAN LEONARD WHAT ARE YOU DOING HERE??????#oh my god im so fucking dumb that what dps stands for#its dead poets society oh my god 😭😭😭#rsl my bbg#need him BAD!!!!!!!!!#squealing oh my god hes so !!!!!!!!!!!!#hamilton mention what the fuck#giggling#I SHOULD NOT BE LAUGHING AT THIS BUT I AM 😭😭 im a horrible person actually oh my god#MY PRAYERS WERE ANSWERED TOO LATE LMAOOOO 😭😭#how is mwb still alive what#actually last message was nineteen days ago so i guess it isnt#ok im done
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