#lmfao like damn.. gotta be selective STILL

[charmac]

Bit of a (late) long-ass personal post, but this past year has been insanely monumental for me and a lot of it, if not almost all of it, was centered around this silly comedy show.

Starting the year adopting the most perfect cat in the world purely because he looked like Agent Jack Bauer, I've ended up meeting amazing people and making great friendships, both online and in person, I met Glenn and Charlie and MEE and Meg (and Humphrey) and Danny?? got my first tattoo, bought way too much whiskey, and I've just really, genuinely enjoyed my time posting on Tumblr, making shit, and writing fic more than I have in half a decade. It's stupid, and sappy, and probably pretty parasocial, but I owe so many of my best experiences this past year not only to the show, but to joining this community. Because I wouldn't have experienced much of any of this if I hadn't jumped the casual fan on r/IASIP ship and washed up ashore here. And being here has improved my life and my mental health in ways I can't even begin to properly express.

So here's a photo dump of what I have to dub "A Very Sunny 2023":

To everyone here, thank you for being a part of my 2023. I'm not sure what 2024 has in store, but I'm happy I'll be here, creating and experiencing whatever it is, through and beyond.

[callsign-marlie]

good boy. (18+)

pairing: Jake "Hangman" Seresin x gn!clinican (Callsign: Doc) rating: M warnings: 18+ content minors DNI!!!, SUB!HANGMAN!!!, boy's got his head in the gutter 25/8, praise kink hELL YEAH, innuendos galore, handjob mention, pegging/PinA depending on how you visualize Doc :3, thigh grinding, choking kink?, did i mention innuendos EVERYWHERE? summary: a stress test is not a good time for Hangman to imagine getting a handy from his doctor... a/n: HOOBOY THIS IS UNEDITTED. It came out like water and I wrote it in an hour and fifteen minutes LMFAO please enjoy and i'm sorry for the self indulgence. might have to do this from Doc's POV too if people are interested ;)

“Very good, Lieutenant.”

Hangman was doing his best to breathe in and out of the silicone mask covering his mouth and nose. The air collecting tube was connected to a piece swinging just above his head, creaking eerily at each foot strike. The electrodes measuring his heart rate and pulse tugged against his taut skin. The wires they were attached to were tickling each rib while he speed walked up the inclining treadmill. He was hyper aware of how much hardware he was connected to thanks to the quietness in the lab. 

Doc didn’t allow music to play during stress tests. All focus needed to be on them. A shame, really. 

Cardiopulmonary testing was commonplace among naval pilots to make sure their bodies were in the best possible shape to handle the strains of supersonic speeds. Anything less than above average and you’ll be doing PT every morning for the foreseeable future until you are exceptional. These tests didn’t happen often, maybe once every three years, but on a select detachment like this one, all pilots must be subject to one to ensure they would be able to handle the impending trauma for high-G flight.

“How are you doing?”

Doc’s eyes were trained on their computer screen, but he could hear the smirk in their voice as the treadmill ramped higher. “Just peachy, Doc. I could do this all day.”

Doc tore their vision from the squiggling lines to wrap a blood pressure cuff around his upper arm. This part? The worst. The constriction of that stupid wrap bothered him more than his face being covered.

“You know I’m perfect, you really gotta do that?”

“It’s just a part of protocol, Lieutenant Seresin. If I don’t track your blood pressures and you’re hypertensive under exertion here, you could blow a coronary in the sky and die before your plane incinerates you. Period, the end. Do you think I'd want that on my conscience?”, they teased. The cool metal of their stethoscope stung against his inner elbow as the cuff inflated tightly.

The treadmill ticked up again. The pace was getting awkward. He wanted to jog, but it was still too slow to keep pace. “At least I’d go out in a blaze of glory.”

Doc was silent as they released the pressure of their cuff. “Good boy, you’re doing great.” They ticked in the new number to their computer.

If he wasn’t as sturdy as he was, Hangman would have face planted. G-Good boy? Was that a fluke? Did they think they were talking to their dog? Or a kid, maybe? Doc sees all kinds of patients being such a well renowned physician to North Base and its inhabitants. He felt a flush grow across his cheeks and a warmth in his chest. Doc’s grin of satisfaction was enough to extend the fire to the pit of his stomach. “Ah, there’s the heart rate increase. Keep going.”

Jake couldn’t help his breathing getting heavier. He was doing well? As he damn well should! He was the best of the best and he was only going to prove it. The treadmill ramped further, the aviator finally taking off in a comfortable jog. 

“You look great up there,” Doc encouraged, eyes running over the cut muscles of his torso. “Give me more.”

Give me more. All Jake could imagine was Doc’s hands wrapped around his neck, his breathing tight, their core straddled against his thigh as they ground down onto him, hot and hard. He could hear his own moans, loud and raunchy. Spittle would be running down the side of his lips begging to be kissed. He would be a good boy and let them work their magic, wishing they'd move slightly north to slide over his cock. He would be doing his best to look them in the eyes while they-

“You alright, Lieutenant? Your ventilation rate just increased exponentially. Get it under control. Can you do three more minutes for me?”

“A-anything for you,” he sputtered, doing his best to reign his brain in. The sweat that was pooling along his upper lip was becoming a nuisance. He felt like he was only breathing in heat. Three minutes. Just had to hold out for three more minutes…

No, he needed to push further.

The burning in his stomach was causing more of a problem than he anticipated. Jake never experienced a runner’s high before, but this had to be damn near close. He always thought runners were masochists putting their body through such turmoil all to chase the pavement. The way he was feeling, it had to be similar.

“Don’t stop. Push yourself.”

Push yourself. Jake’s imagination went wild at the thought of Doc’s fist twisting around his cock, their fingertips dusting over the tip before pulling away. Push yourself. He imagined himself squirming and writhing against the bed, the loss of friction agonizing when they teasingly pull away. They always came back though, fingers twisting around the head of his dick until he was purple and so hard. He was always so close… it just wasn’t enough.

“Open your eyes Lieutenant. That’s it, good job. Can you keep going?”

His legs were automatic at this point. He didn’t feel anything else. Just the pulse in his head and his constricted breathing were the only things keeping him grounded. Jake was near a sprint up the hill, running up a ladder. “I can go! I can go!”

“Give me one more minute, you’re doing so well for me!”

Did this idiot even know what they were saying?! Jake’s head was a lost cause. He could feel himself bent over and oh so full, his asshole pulling and stretching at every thrust behind them. You’re doing so well for me. He imagined himself trying to hold back his whimpers at each pound into his little hole, but their skillful fingers would knot in his hair and pull. He’d be yanked up harshly against their chest. Doc’s fingers would be flicking, pinching and pulling at his nipples as he came apart in pieces–

Jake bailed. Holy shit. His body was a complete limp noodle minus the al dente one hanging between his legs.

“Great job, well done! Excellent work!”

His chest was heaving and his mouth was completely dry. The hardness in his shorts was extremely uncomfortable as he doubled over, watching the track slow and the machine lowering itself back flat. He was trying the best he could to conceal the tent in his shorts as Doc moved behind him, their hips so close to his. He could feel their heat. He could feel just how close they were as they reached on their tip tops to undo the velcro strap of his mask with nimble fingers. He wondered what they would have felt like spreading him wide…

“All done, Lieutenant. That was one of the most emphatic passes I’ve seen yet! I’ll have the results to Admiral Simpson by tomorrow. Head to the showers, you deserve it.”

He was spun to face them, his head dizzy, as their nitrile-covered fingers worked to dig under the electrodes. They snapped them off with 10 delicious rips from his skin, the hair on his chest pulling at the sensation. He needed to grab the side rails in order to stop the moans from escaping his throat.

Doc tossed the aviator a towel to dry off and reached into the top cabinet next to their work station to grab a water bottle for him. The hem of their shirt rode up just enough to tease a view of small of their back and a full view of their ample ass in those tight as fuck scrubs.

Hangman, his face creased in concentration, trudged off the treadmill with knocking knees to reach for his t-shirt on the chair by the lab door. The standard issued naval PT shirt was on at light speed, sweat leaking through the heather gray, as he turned to wave goodbye to Doc. “Th-thanks for your time. And, uh, thanks for the water. Uh, I-I'll see you again.” A hand moved to brush the sweat off his face… and maybe extinguish part of the embarrassed burn in his cheeks while he exited the lab. No way they didn't know. No way.

“I look forward to it,” Doc cooed, their eyes drinking in his body.

He needed to get the fuck out before he creamed his shorts right there.

Their gaze lingered steadily on the soft curve of his ass for a moment too long before they sent him wink, turning back to their paperwork. “The heart never lies, Lieutenant. The heart never lies. I can see it all.”

—-

“Yo Bagman, how’d the stress test go?” Phoenix was all smiles as Jake exited the lab, peering up from her too-old lobby copy of People magazine. “Doc didn’t torture you too badly, did they? I heard they had a mean streak.”

Jake sneered at the woman. “It’s Hangman. And they said it was an emphatic pass, thank you very much. I’d like to see you weaklings try to beat my time. You won’t come close.”

Rooster, who sat beside her to wait for his own turn, looked up from his phone with a quirked brow. “Ya know, I’d be a little offended if I didn’t know you suck at running. Don’t tattle, Hangman. It’s not a good look on you when your credibility is already shakier than an earthquake.”

Bob, who was sandwiched between the two, squirmed unsteadily in his seat while attempting eye contact with Hangman. “You know, what Phoenix said is true, though. I heard they had nearly sent Coyote through the roof when he went in for his hip therapy after that basics accident he had. He said they kept saying “how well” he was doing as they started to bend him like a pretzel. He said the relief he felt when their fingers dug into just the right spot was something that…”

Jake wasn’t listening anymore. He didn’t even acknowledge them as he hustled through the door, slamming it shut behind them. Fuck those idiots.

He needed a cold shower.

---

tagging: @fangirlofallthings22

[aforrestofstuff]

I'd like to know if you have any cooking skills headcanons!! Like, from who's able to make a absolute meal to who burns microwaved instant noodles.

I’ve done a few individual headcanons about cooking before, but I think it’s time for a refresher. You could call this... the main course.

Okay, enough of that bullshit. Here’s the hcs. Thanks for your ask, anon! ❤️❤️💞

Disclaimer: this shit is crack as fuck because I have very strong feelings about cooking lmfao. FOH don’t interact.

Tornado of Terror: She’d find a way to burn ice cream, honestly. She tries so hard (by god she tries) but her meals always come out as a convoluted mess with ingredients that have no reason being together. She eats her steaks well done and boils hamburgers. It’s a nightmare. She doesn’t really spend too much time in the kitchen, however, because she knows she sucks at cooking and because of this, makes 90% of her diet consist of takeout. But if she did spend more of her day cooking, she’d probably discover the recipe to meth accidentally. It’s that bad.

Silverfang: Stubborn old grandpa way of cooking. He’s got a handful of recipes that have been passed down for generations and he’s gonna carry those fuckers to his grave. When Garou was living at the dojo, the little bastard would try to make some changes to these recipes and Bang had to will every molecule in his arthritis-riddled body to not RKO this kid (not really, Bang wouldn’t hurt a fly). But I digress. He’s a decent cook, knows all the fundamentals and all of that shit.

Atomic Samurai: Can’t cook or bake for shit although he, of course, talks himself up like he can. The extent of his cooking knowledge is only within the realm of “shit you can roast over a campfire when your cheap ass can’t scrape together enough coin to pay the electricity bill”. But now that he’s got that S-Class paycheck and three other disciples to freeload off of, they pretty much cater to his every food-related need. He’s useless in the kitchen. Utterly fucking useless.

Child Emperor: Doesn’t know how to cook (little bastard ain’t even tall enough to reach the stove imo) but luckily he’s got that PHAT BRAIN so he can easily just build a Gordon Ramsey bot 3000 to replace his incompetence in the kitchen. His diet consists of Dino nuggets and microwaveable noodles so it’s not like he’s doing the world a great disservice by not learning how to cook properly.

Metal Knight: Same as Child Emperor except he’s a rich bastard and programs his bots to make that fancy shit with only the finest ingredients. He’s got enough cash from doing black market tech trades and building up his robo-army that this motherfucker could snort caviar for fun. He’s a real pompous asshole about it.

King: His mom taught him to cook a few things, nothing serious. He’s one of those dudes that doesn’t really know how to make much, but the few dishes that he does know how to cook are fucking BOMB. He’s got a cast iron skillet for making pancakes and everything, bitch is already halfway to being a chef himself. Other than that, however, he’s a ramen monster. His blood is practically pre-packaged bone broth.

Zombieman: I’ve said this in a previous hc but he’s a damn good cook. One problem though: he only knows how to make single servings of everything because he eats alone almost all the time. He specializes in meats. Bitch is a carnivore. He bought himself a set of those 500-dollar butcher knives so he can carve up cuts like a monster. He hemorrhages cash into fancy wood chips so he can get that smoky flavor juuuuust right. He’s got an Outdoor Chef setup on his patio. My mans is living the DREAM.

Drive Knight: He can eat but does he really need to? His cooking expertise is popping a new battery in. There you go.

Pig God: Oh my god if this man’s kitchen isn’t Michelin-Star quality. He eats a lot and he cooks a lot, it’s only natural. He’s got an indoor grill and pot chandelier and buys industrial-sized buckets of pickles and roast beef by the cow and— okay he just has a lot of food, alright? And he’s got that PHAT S-Class paycheck so my boy probably has a whole walk-in fridge just to put all the fucking food he eats. Bonus points if he hires a dishboy to work and a contractor to implement a three-sink dish station with “Clean-Rinse-Sanitize” stickers slapped on the steel, lol. But yeah, he cooks for 500 people at a time because he eats enough for 500 people at a time. Gotta maintain that figure, you know what I’m saying?

Superalloy Darkshine: He has. Oh my god— he has a full shelf dedicated to just. DOZENS OF JARS of whey protein. He has two blenders: one for fruit smoothies and one for protein shakes. His kitchen? Spotless. He knows how to cook and he eats like a bodybuilder (because he is one, duh) so he’s got that fridge STOCKED at all times. He cleans like he’s getting paid for it because nothing feels better than wiping down a gas stove until that bitch is spotless. However, his taste is garbage. He can throw down in the kitchen but does it taste good? No. Sometimes the ultra-healthy alternative to something isn’t always the greatest. He’s grown accustomed to putting zucchini in his cakes and almost damn well likes the texture of it, but don’t invite this guy to the potluck because he WILL show up with a vegetable nightmare that’s sure to make even vegans gag. Sorry bud, but nobody likes soy bacon.

Watchdog Man: furry ass.

Flashy Flash: I’ve said this before in a previous hc, but he’s pescatarian. He grew up on a coastal town before being sold of to the ninja village like a goddamned carpet and now fish is the only meat he eats. His cooking ability is about as good as one would expect from a homesless ninja. Like Atomic Samurai, he can throw it down over the campfire and still find a way to make a decent dish (in both presentation and taste) despite having limited knowledge and resources to work with. Bitch can whip up a five-star meal with some branches, a fish, and half a carrot like it was second nature. That’s about it though. He’s useless in an actual kitchen.

Genos: It’s canon. He’s a housewife. He only knows how to make the select few dishes that play an integral part in Saitama’s diet, though (because Genos can eat but he doesn’t really need to, so he only does it when he and Saitama are sharing a meal). Those dishes include things like: actual garbage. He cooks shit food. It’s not his fault. Saitama just eats like a fucking twat. There’s rats that live in the dumpster outside the restaurant I work in that have a better diet than him. Genos just works with what the poor bastard’s got and has gained a pretty mediocre grasp on cooking because of it. If he wanted to, though, he could easily be the best chef in all the land. Too bad he’s more focused on being an ultra-powerful speed demon.

Metal Bat: Tries his absolute best to cook healthy meals for him and Zenko when he almost always resorts to just popping a frozen pizza in the oven and calling it a day. I’ve said this before in a previous hc, but he eats his shit BURNT. Bitch like his steak well done, his yolks grey, and his chicken vaporized. The only exception to this is sushi because there really is no other way to enjoy it other than having it raw. Trust me, though. If there was a way to burn the fuck out of sashimi while still having it be sashimi, he’d find a way to do it and like it. But yeah, as I said: he sucks ass at cooking. He’s tried the tutorials, he’s bought the skillets, he’s sharpened the knives, but he just can’t fucking do it.

Tanktop Master: Same as Superalloy. They bond over gross-ass ultra-healthy recipes that only they enjoy. The Tanktop Gang loves him but they always kindly refuse to eat over at his house because they know he’s gonna try to make them ingest a broccoli loaf or some shit. He’s not too strict about his diet, though. He’ll chill out and have a pizza every once and a while, but only when he’s hanging out with the homies.

Puri-Puri Prisoner: He has a job in prison where he helps out in the kitchen for seventy-five cents an hour, but that’s about the extent of it. He’s got the bare basics down and could put together a decent meal for date night if he really tried (and had a damn kitchen to work with). On top of that, he can throw down some tasty prison food recipes, hand-crafted from the brick box itself. Ramen pad Thai, anyone?

Amai Mask: he’s rich as fuck, why does he need to cook? Bitch hired a chef and now all he does it drink skim milk and eat food from the top shelf. He couldn’t fry an egg if his life depended on it. Poor bastard doesn’t even know what a whisk is. And don’t even get me started on how much of a slob he is. The ten-minute process of making a single plate of spaghetti will have his kitchen in such a disgusting state that it’ll take him and a trusty Mister Clean Magic Eraser five hours just to clean it up. That is, if he even has the basic human decency to pick up after himself. He’ll probably just hire someone to do for him and then tip them a crisp 100-dollar bill for their troubles, only to make an even worse mess tomorrow.

Iaian: I’ve said this before in a previous hc, but yes: he can cook. It’s nothing special. He’s got a suburban dad sense of cooking where he, like King, can only make a select few dishes but makes those dishes taste magical. He’s got 0 utensils and shit kitchen to work with (because Kami’s place is probably like, centuries old on account of him still being a Samurai), but boy can Iaian whip up a feast like no other despite all that. It’s all protein-packed flavor bombs that look simple in comparison to, say, Zombieman or Metal Knight’s food, but it still tastes good all the same. Kama eats off of his plate all the time and it used to annoy him but they’ve grown so close that they might as well share forks at this point.

Okamaitachi: Can’t really cook, but they are a baking god. I don’t know much about baking but I know they’ve got a cupboard dedicated to their plethora of sourdough starters. They buy yeast by the pound and make enough bread to feed entire armies some days. Whatever the gang doesn’t eat, they donate it to the local homeless shelter and make it a habit to go out of their way performing good deeds that don’t always involve sword fighting (something Kami insists he instilled into them via his teachings— which is bullshit. Kama is just naturally good-hearted and sweet).

Bushidrill: Can’t cook or bake for shit but like Atomic Samurai and Flash, can throw it down on the campfire. Don’t let this man near any turkeys or pigs because he will spitroast the fuck out of them.

Fubuki: Okay, not only is she a great cook but she’s as dogmatic as a coked-out head chef. She and the Blizzard Group sometimes cook together in her massive kitchen (she poured all of her measly paycheck into it because by god, if her apartment doesn’t have a kitchen fit for a chef then it’s not worth living in), and she’ll be barking orders like a damn crow. She’s got the two-grand knife set, cast-iron everything, bronze accents on the sink, and the ability to deglaze a pan without starting a fire. She’s a natural. If she cooks for you, then that’s how you know she likes you. All in all, her food tastes and looks great. She’s a bit low on funds on account of being only Class-B, so she sometimes takes little shortcuts when plating her dishes, like using celery leaves in place of parsley and all that jazz.

Saitama: I’ve already said that his diet is absolute shit and part of that is due to being poor, but I will show mercy and say that he’s a decent cook. He only makes what he knows he’s gonna like and doesn’t leave any room for experimentation unless his budget allows it (which isn’t often). His kitchen only has the bare essentials. Genos has offered to buy him more equipment and even renovate the damn thing for him but Saitama refuses each time because then he’d have a bigass kitchen just for making a poor man’s omurice, and that would be a waste. His talent, though? Making a perfect omelet. He can fold the egg like a sheet with no tears and no brown spots. It tastes heavenly.

Mumen Rider: Ultra-safe in the kitchen. He doesn’t even own a knife sharpener because he’s clumsy enough to know he’ll cut himself the moment he even tries to use it. His pot handles all have coverings and he’s watched all of the food safety and fire safety videos out there. He could give a goddamned seminar on it. Food-wise, he’s a decent home cook. Nothing special. He does, however, share Superalloy and Tanktop’s nasty habit of over healthy-ing everything to oblivion and making it a tasteless, vegetative mess. It doesn’t matter if you invite him to the potluck or not because he’ll bring a cauliflower pizza anyway and y’all better fucking enjoy it or he’ll start crying.

Sonic: The same as Flashy Flash, minus the pescatarianism. He’d butcher a pig without blinking an eye, and often uses his katana in cooking (even though it poses like, 87 different safety hazards and is most definitely health violation). He can forage quite well and has taken a liking to wild mushrooms and berries over the years. It’s gotten so natural to him that he now knows by heart the specific time of year in which the wild berries are ripest, and which species of salmon inhabit certain streams on any given day.

Garou: Would burn water. End of story. His cooking is so bad and dangerous that everyone thinks he’s an arsonist when he really just starts fires on accident. Don’t let this fucker near a stove, for the love of god.

[anonil88]

Lovecraft Country Season Finale liveblog

Bih I'm scared as fuck but whew chile here we go.

Oh damn so this is the next fucking day god damn. Oh shit the book of names is a book of spells.

Awww fuck she passed out too cause she's carrying his baby.

Oh fuck yall see topsy and bopsy, in the title card.

So Tic and Leti are about to have different understanding and fears of the book and their legacy. Oof this magic is rage and anger.

Why do i feel like Leti bouta be the real savior here in this story.

George ?!?!?! His mama ?!?!? HIS MOMMA. I wonder when was the last time he saw her, like just how old was he when she passed etc.

Aw he's his mommas boy, also hold up she said he gotta fucking die?

Oof so she was in love with his uncle and his daddy. They both raised him so hey I guess they both were a part of his parental village.

It's like the exorcism.

SHE IS BEYOND C'EST!!!

Ah so they are going to bind Christina's powers....damn.

Lmfao they really locked sprinkles in the basement.

This is cute and stressful but I cannot stand this music selection.

Stop cutting yalls mother fucking hands.

YO WHAT IF THEY SUMMON CTHULU

Ah so they summoned Titus so Hannah could get her revenge.

SHE DOES LOVE HER! OH SHIT THEY REALLY CARE ABOUT EACHOTHER.

What the fuck does this do??? Like what is the purpose?

Omg they are speaking Xhosa.

Dee is #traumatized and pissed the hell off at her mom, which she deserves to be.

Hippolyta is rocking this damn hair yall.

Oh damn Diana.

Well I see where Ruby is going to come into play here damn.

Christina said bet let's have to have a fucking conversation.

Oooo that trade your legacy or your life.

Damn, god damn.

JI-AH!!!! But also his ass better fucking apologize right fucking now.

Thankyou Tic for the apology she deserved it.

Aww the grief cycle, wait huh? Family? Huh? Yall had sex, um what?

Here these blood sisters go.

Wait sis was in jail ? Why she ain't say that from jump.

Leti said can you please fuck your girlfriend so that we can bind her.

But, sis you done fucked Ruby over time and time again. She ain't wrong tho.

Omg I love this comic book! Awe no sweetheart no. Your momma got you on everything.

Hippolyta is gonna make her child an arm, I bet you.

Ayyy

Here these two go. I can't even lie these two are foine as hell together. She really teaching her.

She can use the potion for the body of christ.

Omg they gon kiss omg omg.

Oh some time has passed, and I oop. Ji-ah just family now?

Ruby got her sister on everything and is just gonna deal with loosing her lover. Damn.

This is so wholesome. Which means this episode is gonna go to shit.

Binding spell here we go, ewwwww he's eatting his family members. Gag.

Christina is about to be pissed off but they intend to bind her powers not kill her.

How are there only 20 mins left bruh.

The towns people still there o.o

This family is crafty as hell and I think Ruby is having 2nd thoughts.

Aw shit Christina is in Ruby's body. Awwww shit.

NO! 😭😭😭

This shit is going south fast as fuck.

I was right, watch every fucking one die.

Bruh. Wait what if this is a dream.

The shoggoths gon get Dee, nooooo.

This is too much, this is too much.

All dressed in white, she said you played on my feelings and I don't appreciate that. Fuck.

YOOO THERE ARE 10 MINUTES LEFT!

Sprinkles is that you? Since....nah its not sprinkles. AYYY SPRINKLES.

I think Leti has a protection on her so she's possibly alive.

Omg they cut his veins straight open.

I.....wtf.

See she is still alive, this gon fuck him up but might give him strength idk.

This is so fucked.

But im pretty sure Christina is gonna.....yep.

Aw shit it comes down to Ji-ah. This is fucking epic.

They tore a damn hole in fucking time and bound her damn powers.

So black people now have magic that the white folks can't access, thats mad smart.

Oh no Montrose nooo noooo

So this feels like a series finale but this was really really good.

Dee bouta get sprinkles to eat her ass up.

Ayyy Dee is the robot girl.

One season and done it seems but im really happy with this. A good win of black folks finally persevering. I know a lot of folks aren't gonna be happy I think but it was enjoyable.

[unproduciblesmackdown]

also i’ve been mulling over the “we’re Living ex machina!!!!” line and like, it still doesn’t make sense Really, but here’s my Afternoon Musings i guess

i’ve only actually seen ex machina once like 3 years ago but as i remember it goes a little something like This: some rando white-collar programmer guy has like, won a contest where the prize is to go hang out for maybe a few days or a week or so with this ~visionary genius~ tech dude played by oscar isaac at oscar isaac tech dude’s off-the-grid reclusive mansion or whatever.......i thiiiink the Protag Programmer won b/c his programming submission was Really Good but also maybe there’s a [randomly selected] element to it, or maybe we Think it was partly random selection but then learn it was actually All “yeah i chose you b/c your coding was the Best,” idk. doesn’t really matter but anyway yeah protag guy gets helicoptered in to the oscar isaac genius bro’s secret mansion 

oscar isaac soon reveals he has this advanced ai android whomst he wants the Protagonist to study / turing test, and the protagonist does that, but during one Conversation Session with this android (who is named ava i think? and designed to Look Like a Woman oo) like the lights turn off and ava-i-think informs the protagonist she’s found a Weakness in the mansion’s security system and hackt it so that the power (and thus the Security / Monitoring Systems) shut down for a minute like this but could feasibly be thought of as a glitch and anyways she’s like yeah i have feelings and thoughts and i want to Not Be Trapped here, ya gotta help me out here buddy, and then yknow ooh the systems come back on, oscar isaac can Observe them again, intrigue.....tl;dr protag and ava keep having these short secret convos and Do plan to break her out, there’s this dramatic moment where oscar isaac (who’s natch been acting weirder and more erratic as the plot unfolds) confronts the protag after the protag has just like, tried to get him blackout smashed by Hanging Out With Him lmfao and oscar isaac is like “ooh i knew you were planning to break her out, i’m gonna stop you guys though haha pwned” but then oh further twist, turns out ava and protag Knew that was the case and were thinking one step ahead and idk but yeah they break her out and oscar isaac dies but ooh further twist!!! ava locks the protag (or well, just Does Not Unlock, As Planned) in some room and leaves the mansion and gets on the Helicopter meant to take the protag back to wherever after the planned end of his stay. and the protag is just stuck there b/c everyone else is dead and presumably he dies as ava gets to exist in the outside world now, idk, we don’t need ex machina 2 where he’s escaped or smthing lmao

and i do NOT get what winston is comparing their situation to lmfao. like, oh rian is like an advanced ai android??? if anything, her being the more like ~true believer in High Finance as a means of socially beneficial effect~ vs winston like, having the supposedly cutthroat and cold Math approach would make Him more of the ~oh no more a robot than a person~ (though i think it’s Ambiguous whether we wanna judge ava as more Scary Bad or Sympathetic).........you can’t even really make the connection that “oh no we’re being deliberately Replaced!!” b/c if winston is [protag programmer rando] and rian is [ava] and wendy is, i guess oscar isaac then, uhhhh oscar isaac most definitely did Not intend to ~replace~ the protag with ava, he very much wanted her trapped in his mansion still........and the protagonist Only got “replaced” by ava in the sense that she took his place on the helicopter out of the reclusive secret mansion. i really doubt she planned to, or would even be able to, like take over his identity/life beyond that.....certainly not his job lol like, coworkers are gonna notice you’re a different person, there was no implication the androids can like oh shapeshift their appearance or whatever, and no implications about what ava even intended to do in the Outside World which is kind of bemusing b/c like, what of the Practical Questions of being an android and needing whatever Fuel Source a robot does, idk that might’ve been addressed or smthing like “oh yeah they can just Eat,” also she clearly does not Trust People considering her only company was evil oscar isaac creator and she wasn’t interested in bringing the protag along, plus yknow the fact that she Did deliberately manipulate the protag into thinking that she wanted to escape into the world With him........but not like i guess she has any choice for any other world to escape into but the one with all the people where she pretends to be an organic human

like there is just NO point of comparison where these situations line up unless you get soooooooo like broad strokes about ex machina that you’d do better to compare your experience to Anything else lmao. like, does winston think she’s some like, ideal advanced version of him?? like you might consider a crafted AI android to be?? i don’t know but i mean i think we have a more feasible explanation for why he’s so Insistent about this totally being Ex Machina, if only b/c as a straightforward comparison i swear to god it doesn’t work lmfao None of these points line up at all with any significance that’s worth insisting on

given that winston’s Apparently Canonically meant to be crushing on rian, and we have his example of ribbing her by calling her “gal gadot’s quirky sister” which is like, okay so the dunk is “you look similar to this famous a-lister who everyone thinks is pretty” and “also you’re quirky, boom” like, i think that could easily be meant as like, a Tell that winston already ~likes~ her.............aaaand it’s also somewhat ~ambiguous~ but i mean i think it’s safe to say that in Ex Machina you may understand the protag as having Fallen For the ai android lady. so maybe we can Understand this invocation of ex machina as being like “ooh person meant to replace me is Attractive but ultimately i think this Overall Situation is a bad thing i shouldn’t feel this way i resent it” like, a bit of a Reach, but honestly it’s way more of a reach to think about applying anything else about this scenario to ex machina, so i could v much believe that the thought that went behind writing this is once again, like, “okay winston’s invoking one thing on the surface level here, but simultaneously he’s already (inadvertently probably) acknowledging like oh also i have a crush on her already”

between this episode seeming to be Setup and the [winston has a Canon crush] and the fact that it probably seems like They Will Fuck A Nonzero Number Of Times or Make Out At Least But It’s Billions So, Might Get A Humorous Cut To [Postcoital] Or A Scene Where They Arrive At Work Together Short Of Breath With Messy Hair  And Hickies And Winston’s Got A Hoodie W/ “Property Of Rian” On It Until He Goes "Oh Shit Woops” And Hands It To Her And She’s Like “Oh Btw You Forgot Your Glasses.....Uh You Left Them Here On Your Desk Yesterday I Mean Of Course” And Hands Them To Him And An Unnamed Character Stands Up And Asks “Daily Poll: Who Had Sex With A Coworker Last Night” And Rian And Winston Raise Their Hands Before Going “Oh Wait” And Lowering Them With A Shake Of The Head And A Nervous Cough and i’m exaggerating but you know, the equivalent of the billions writing saying “wwinnnk” at us. i am fine with them having an unsolemn like, quasi-rivals-to-lovers (or -And-lovers) dynamic, even with it being a bit messy in like, still an overall Fun way, where yknow it doesn’t have to be peak epic romance cuz a) that’s just Always true and yet it can still be overall an okay thing even if they don’t quite get it together / mostly just trade sparks and sometimes hook up and b) idk seems like mayybe rian’s character isn’t meant to go beyond this season, so, an inherent limit there if true

i’m like Apologetic for being like “already i like their dynamic even as Romantique and it’s kinda cute and fun and i’m willing to continue to be engaged w/ this as long as the writing doesn’t completely fuck it up” lmao like, i guess i Did inadvertently give myself time to prepare for this exact eventuality b/c of wondering if this exact character would have A Thing w/ winston whenever she showed up and even if i was like “haha the character could show up Anywhere and do Anything and what are the odds, right” i was also like “hmm but i’m going to really think about it though” like, as always, didn’t think i was cassandraing that hard, but truly did do it 4x03 style where everyone else can be like “you never [made the text post or gave any indication you were thinking about “what if whoever she plays and winston have some kind of romance thing going on”]” and i can go “i only thought it but didn’t say it....doesn’t count” but well. i did think it lmao and why would i make it up.......sorry i had such a head start on Getting More Used To This Notion.......some crimes can never be forgiven.meme.......

anyways natch “intense horrible passionate” seems a little foreboding but maybe she was talking about it relative to [any Normal show] rather than the standards we’re used to on billions, where this was all but a Meet Cute, and a kind of quasi coworker rivalry where nobody’s taking it *that* deeply seriously and they also seem to mutually like each other by the end of 5x05 already so how not-amicable can it get. and re: Intense like, maybe the writing in future episodes will totally upend this, but i’d say rian and winston in 5x05, even when “clashing,” was like damn near laidback and chill. neither of them seem at all that pressed, but maybe even a sorta-playful Friendly Rivalry is more “intense” than, say, a dynamic that involves no rivalry at all. imo “Passionate” is just like, okay, so they’ll fuck or at least make out? sure. not sure what to make of “horrible” lmfao maybe again it’s addressing like “this is a lil messy and they’re kinda rivals!!!” like, certainly not an ideal start, except by billions standards it IS weirdly great. rian seeming good-naturedly amused by winston is something we didn’t get from his longtime-coworkers until like, now, sort of, and still not to the degree that anyone has smiled at him as many times as rian did in like that course of [1 min long First Scene Together] wherein also winston always gets off to a way worse start with people lmao............like everything about this seems Way Better And More Dialed Back And Grounded than usual, actually. but it’s that like, point of reference of “what’s Usual for winston and, more broadly, Billions” that maybe explains this weirdly strong language when all in 5x05 seemed chill actually

anyways like i said Sorry For Already Liking Rian/Winston This Much with my head start and all where like, i’m even tentatively looking forward to seeing where this goes, by “tentative” i also mean going [”i’ll kill you” the office.jpg] at billions where i am fully aware that maybe where this goes *is* a mess and not in like, just kind of a fun, non-melodramatic, not-treated-like-a-total-joke-but-also-not-that-big-a-deal way, where 5x05 could seem like Those Halcyon Days b/c everything from here out just devolves into an unappealing disaster.......but this is an unexpectedly solid start imo and like. even if this doesn’t become like this epic romance where they officially date and if rian does eventually depart the show by the end of the season, it can still just be Enjoyable and Fun for the characters and, god forbid, the viewers, where like, you don’t have to demand we be desperately invested with our entire life in this deadly serious heartwrenching epic romance, they can just kind of mess around and enjoy having a mutual attraction w/ this mathy rivalry and etc and it’s neither a tragedy of “the greatest love story of all time torn asunder” Or, truly god forbid,” this is a Whole Mess In A Bad Way b/c winston’s involved and ugh who could Really like him, being at all romantically entangled is an embarrassing mistake surely, ew cringe we hate him............like, cautiously optimistic in how like i always say that a Romantic Arc is just an easy/efficient way to develop both characters and it could certainly humanize winston an ounce in a show that treats him more like a walking algorithmic plot device and the thoughts of any viewers but us are limited to “winston annoying” basically........the show doesn’t seem to treat rian as a joke, so it seems possible that their mutual Romance in whatever way it unfolds could also be Not A Joke, which means winston’s part in it isn’t a joke, so that’s Some aspect of him for people to take seriously, for once..........like, the way his apparently-already-official crush played out in 5x05 *was* funny but it also didn’t seem like oh it’s a joke b/c his feelings are a total joke......it might seem that way if this *was* totally unrequited and going nowhere, but i somewhat get the sense that the interest is mutual even by the end of the ep, that didn’t strike me as a “shove off, it could Never Happen” shutdown from rian there, just like, hold off on that for rn maybe cue to rein it in a little, not just yet........anyways lmao i’m like “oh yeah i started this post about the baffling ex machina thing” but yeah the point is i think so far it’s pretty solid and i like it and am cautiously but [relative-to-billions level of Hopeful] about whatever developments we’re surely gonna get b/c it def sounds like this has Not ended with 5x05, but seriously @ billions i swear to god. yes so far the approach to winston’s crush here and even their unfolding mutual dynamique and dare i say, romantic interest, is being handled with an encouraging level of “this is Humorous but the characters / their feelings are not what’s being treated as A Total Joke or anything,” but who knows what will come next, this is billions and you can’t predict anything. fingers crossed about it all, though

[empyrebled]

SHIPPING INFO   //   answer the following for your muse(s) so people know how shipping works on your blog. REPOST. don’t reblog.

001.     /     WHAT’S YOUR OTP FOR YOUR MUSE ? :     shiro and xanax     ...     no but headass have ya’ll seen the sheith on my blog like 002.     /     WHAT ARE YOU WILLING TO RP WHEN IT COMES TO SHIPPING ? :     i’m pretty much comfortable with anything ! no nsfw just yet, i have two more months till i can actually write it, but as far as that, nothing’s off the table ! 003.     /     HOW LARGE DOES THE AGE GAP HAVE TO BE TO MAKE IT UNCOMFORTABLE ? :    well, for one, any one below thirteen with an actual adult. hell, shipping anyone ( same age group even ) when they’re younger than fifteen actually lowkey makes me uncomfortable. if the age gap is just a couple years, though, then i’m not bothered at all. 004.     /     ARE YOU SELECTIVE WHEN SHIPPING ? :     honestly ? yeah     ....     i need to know the mun well enough, first of all, and i have to explore aspects of a relationship besides ones i’ve already deemed canon for my shiro. needless to say if it works out and i’ve talked with you for a while then by all means !! let’s go from there !! but idk, anything less than that ??  005.     /     HOW FAR DO STEAMY MOMENTS HAVE TO GO BEFORE THEY’RE CONSIDERED NS.FW ? :     typically, imo, i think when they start getting a bit handsy. make - out scenes are gucci, but when it starts getting a little bit past that, unfortunately i can’t write that just yet. 006.     /     WHO ARE OTHER MUSES YOU SHIP YOUR MUSE WITH ? :     hAHAHAHAH well idk !! i haven’t really been talking to anyone besides a keith mun to even consider shipping. before i even had a blog for shiro up, though, i did ship with my friend and her oc !! i still ship them, they’re just so cute    ...    plus my friend is an absolute blessing and i just love writing with them in general lmFAO 007.     /     DOES ONE HAVE TO ASK TO SHIP WITH YOU ? :     if it’s anything more than unrequited, it’s preferred for us to communicate first. i’m selective, and i’m particularly jaded because of past experiences both in and out of tumblr roleplay.  008.     /     HOW OFTEN DO YOU LIKE TO SHIP ? :     shiro and i are BIG ASS ROMANTICS ok shipping is my damn hecking life 009.     /     ARE YOU SHIP OBSESSED OR SHIP MORE-OR-LESS ? :    not necessarily ‘ obsessed ‘ but shipping is beautiful and i love it so yeah !!  010.     /     ARE YOU MULTISHIP ? :     HELL YEAH HELL YEAH  011.     /     WHAT IS ( ARE ) YOUR FAVORITE SHIP(S) IN YOUR CURRENT FANDOM ? :     sh / eith. my lifeline. the reason for my existence. I HAVEN’T TALKED ABOUT MANY OTHER SHIPS but sh / eith is life rn 012.     /     FINALLY, HOW DOES ONE SHIP WITH YOU ? :     if we click and bond really well ? i’m so so so down holy shit ??? ! honestly it just comes to be. and if u want it all u gotta do is ask !!

tagged by :     @regihelion, thank u love !! <33 tagging :     anyone who didn’t get tagged yet lol i’m a little late