#so im a little miffed rn

[phagodyke]

waiting to leave..... 1.5 hrs to go ‼️

[stevebabey]

CONGRATULATIONS RUBY!!! You're one of my favorite authors so I trust that you'll make something amazing out of this request (if you like it and feel like writing it, no pressure)

❤️‍🔥 with “Nobody in the world has hands this soft.”

just a little steve hand appreciation blurb (bonus points if you include comparing hands with him!!!)

M!!!! AHHH THANK U ANGEL!! im literally so :')) rn u are so very talented so it really means the world for me to hear u like what i write!! your bonus point suggestion like shaped this whole blurb im so glad u included it & omg its the first to break 1k+ words. i went for mutual pining besties bcos i've only written established relationship so far ! enjoy my dear!!! <3

You can’t believe you’re listening to advice from a 14-year old.

It feels like a new low. The idea that you can’t figure out the flirting thing on your own combined with the fact it’s your kid friend Dustin who seems to have a mountain-load of advice makes you feel— well, less than stellar.

But times are tough. And shit, it’s not actually bad advice.

Besides, despite Steve being your best friend, you’ll admit Dustin and him are close as well. Close enough that you made Dustin swear not to rat out your feelings to Steve at the first opportune moment.

He’d scoffed, then very reluctantly agreed. Seemed miffed you wouldn’t let him play matchmaker. Then set to work formulating a perfect plan on how you were to woo Steve — though he insisted you really didn’t need to because Steve was already well and truly obsessed with you.

“Honest!” He had said, eyes bright, and with that familiar cocky smile like he knew more than you. Which, in this case, might be true.

“Steve’s crazy for you, I can tell. He once gave this whole talk about,” Dustin waved his hands around. “Electricity. It’s a whole thing with him. Just trust me, you guys have it.”

Which leads to the here and now. You’re in the passenger seat of Steve’s beemer, the drive-in screen glowing ahead of you, just out the windshield. It’s night time, the dark lit up by dozens of shiny neon signs dotted about around the drive-in keeping you cozy in the car.

There’s an advertisement for Scoops Ahoy! ice-cream, all red, white, and blue, nautical symbols in every corner on a board to your right; a crimson and mustard coloured hot-dog stand with bright lit bulbs around it and a comically large weiner atop it. Beside it is a less glammed up, but nevertheless, trusty popcorn stand.

One of the buckets from there sits between you two, balanced between the seats. Steve seems to be unaware of your inner turmoil, his interest in the film properly piqued as you debate internally on Dustin’s advice. The film is miles away to you, worrying your bottom lip as you reconsider Dustin’s words.

“Just, like... find a way to touch his hand. No, wait- compare hand sizes! That’s like the oldest flirt in the book.” He’d nodded with enough fervor you nearly didn’t question him. Nearly.

Narrowing your eyes at him, you’d asked. “And where did you hear that?”

“Suze.” He’d said plainly. “And Suzie said she heard it from the girls at one of her camps. And it worked on me, so it’ll work on Steve. He’s simple!”

So, how do you go about this? You’re not sure there’s a natural way to ask to compare hand sizes. This feels like a flirt you’d do if he was just a handsome stranger at a party and you had a couple tequila shots on your side for encouragement. Leaned against a wall, sultry giggles and seductive touches; that seems more fitted for the flirt you’re about to try.

But you’re Steve’s best friend, not a stranger, and there’s certainly no liquid courage in your veins. No party. Just you, armed with more butterflies in your stomach than you can count and the advice of a 14-year old. God, you’re screwed.

You steel yourself and steal a glance at Steve. He’s in that grey shirt you like, long sleeved with just two buttons up the top. Both of them are undone.

You feel a bit peaky at how it makes you flush, seeing a flash of his chest. Briefly, you wonder if he’s worn the shirt because he knows it’s one of your favourites. The thought provides no relief to your nerves.

You fix your eyes forward and miss the way Steve glances to check on you, a smile toying at his lips.

Coincidentally, when he reaches for the popcorn, so are you — and your hands brush in the middle, burning hot, and you startle at the touch. Steve’s already apologising, pulling his hand but in a moment, you see it clearly there; your segue.

“Your hands are so much bigger than mine,” You comment, with a quiet chuckle to seem casual, shifting yourself to face him better. Your stomach turns over with nerves and you have to force yourself to meet his eye.

You raise your hand a bit, palm facing him. “See?”

Steve’s pauses, only for a moment, but it’s enough to send your heart rocketing. Just as you’re about to retract your hand and hope to hide your crumpled pride, embarrassment stinging at your chest, Steve grins.

He chuckles and twists in his seat to face you, unfurling his hand and extending it out towards your own.

He wavers, hesitating just short of pressing his hand against yours and when your eyes dart up to his face, your stomach tightens up a bit more at what you find. Nervous, you think giddily, he’s nervous.

In another second the expression is gone and he presses his hand flush against yours.

“I think you might have the world’s smallest hands,” He jokes, curling his fingers over the top of yours just to prove the point. He’s wrong but compared to his large hands, you can see why it certainly might seem that way.

“I think you just have huge hands, Harrington,” You remark, enjoying the feeling of his hand against yours far too much.

The butterflies in your stomach have evolved into something bigger — some sort of lovebird that pecks at your heart and leaves it bleeding in your chest. The beat of its wings gets louder every second Steve doesn’t pull away. In fact, he leans in closer.

“Nope, it’s your hands, 100 percent.” He nods along, lips quirked into an amused smile. The film continues unnoticed, just flashes of light that illuminate the side of his face. Subconsciously, you lean closer into his space, nearly close enough that you could lean over and lay one of him. If you wanted.

Steve continues with a tease, “I’m serious! Nobody in the world has hands this small.”

“Nobody in the world has hands this soft.” You counter with a grin. It’s true, Steve’s hands aren’t at all like how you’d expected; instead of calloused and rough, they’re supple and soft. Like a lover, not a fighter.

It takes a moment to realise your slip. Your heart stutters and Steve’s eyes turn a little wide. His cheeks flush and the only comfort is the obvious delight on his features, even as he blushes pink. His eyes dart to your lips. You hold your breath.

“Yeah?” He asks and licks his lips. “I- I’ve, uh, heard— well, some would say the same about my lips.”

It’s not nearly as smooth as you’ve seen him be, words a bit fumbled. He screws his eyes shut for a moment, gathers his courage, then keeps going. His voice is quiet, eyes watching you closely. “Softest... yeah, softest in the world s’what they’ve said...”

If by some terrible tragedy you’ve misread this and he’s not asking for a kiss, you’ll happily let the ground swallow you up after this. But with the nervous gleam in his eye, his pink lips, and hand against yours, you think you like your odds.

You close your eyes, lean in, and think of luck.

And even if it was just a line, you have to agree; these are the softest lips you’ve ever kissed, and maybe in the entire world.

join the celebration <3!

[iodrawsandtalks]

rhetorical.

why are nb people so casual about accepting media with racist remarks or historical erasure and then stigmatizing our reactions if we show them.

im mainly miffed rn about how we got Jade in Honkai: Star Rail rn who uses a whole ass whip and has said “slaves should be obedient to their masters”. And like where is the rage. Why is nobody mad there is a whole ass slave mistress in their big game.

Or why both honkai and genshin games continually market cultural appropriation that conveniently is no longer a problem when its black culture

i kept getting hit with the media literacy excuse like brother you need HISTORICAL literacy

Man i just want to play my games without having to put up with a monkey getting whipped, with a euphemism for a character crazy about watermelons and chickens, or even black characters having lightning/chains.

Like its not my fault im in anime circles and like that kind of content. Its not my fault that I’m born black either.

And like if we apply this to like a 10 year period there are much more examples like the little mermaid incident. I get people hate disney, their cashgrabs, and bad CGI but people were making fun of little black girls they never met because they couldnt understand why a black girl would want to see a black ariel. Why must the problem boil down to racism and why are people who have never experienced it there to dismiss it.

Or that time that final fantasy director said putting black people in the fantasy with ELVES and multi headed birds would affect historical accuracy.

Like are selfless people just rare? Can NOBODY understand societal issues they’ve never suffered? Why do people not fight racism for the sake of those who will come after us??

I’m not selfish if i get mad that some game is insensitive, i get mad on behalf of younger black people entering media spaces like me and feeling like killing themselves like i did. It never stops. And people will put their own issues above everybody else’s. I couldn’t stand using twt as a black guy bc when they find out you’re black they move you to the end of the cutting board and wait till you slip up so they have an excuse not to listen to black people. The n word isnt censored. Nazis can tell you that you should be out on the streets committing crimes like the rest of your people instead of being on twitter. Ive seen so many people look the other way when the right company inserts racism(hyv, inversely disney).

I always get told “its normal” in regards to complaints of international media perpetuating stereotypes and racism and like IT SHOULDNT BE. YOU SHOULD BE ANGRY. oh with hoyoverse honkeys its like “their game is from china and china hates black people🥺” racism is not enforced there. Racism is not enforced in any nation with a stable government. Some places enable it, but as far as I know theres no place where residents have to hit their daily slur quota. The developers are just incels. Racism makes me sick to my stomach and has my veins running hot. Ill feel ready to cut somebody or myself and you’re telling me people will downplay it and dare to say “its not a big deal”?

[bloggerspam]

it doesnt get that far, but Bats and Constantine DO visit at a later date, after they've sorted out the rancid ecto in Jason.

Mostly to hash things out and make sure EVERYONE is aware and in agreement (he's side-eyeing Constantine so hard rn, cuz he made Amity a no fly zone without even explaining why)

Though Bruce is a little miffed that they sent Damian home with a little friend on their last visit, and is trying to get more info on how to care for the little thing.

The lazarus pits = ectoplasm thing ALWAYS intrigues me. It's the best thing to discuss and hash out in dpxdc imho.

Also yes! Tucker's liminality is one of my faves in this AU. I love the idea that he's barely hanging on, and that he has to rely on slow, outdated (some might even say ANCIENT, see what i did that) technology just to keep it together and manageable. Nobody talk s about how Danny can jump into video games NEARLY enough in this fandom, and im making Tucker my poster boy for it. I never give him enough love, if subjecting him to trauma can count as love.

I also wanted to soft launch a sort of disability-adjacent character to my repertoire. He's essentially crippled, mentally and emotionally, and has severe ADHD on top of that. His body is just a vessel now, and sometimes he has to manually make himself breathe.

I just wanna see him not only survive with a handicap, but thrive!

and as I've said before, we writers love you too, you crazy animal ;)

DP x DC prompt #189

You know those prompts where Danny refuses to enter Red Hood's territory because he knows not to enter a ghosts territory? Yeah, this is the opposite.

Batman sends a few of the Batfam to Amity Park to investigate the ghost sightings. When they get there, however, Jason refuses to step into the town due to some instinctual feeling he has.

[simperator]

thank you @lightbluuestars <333

Are you named after anyone?

my middle name is a weird blend of an aggressively welsh and estonian name, first name is literally just after the season lol!

When was the last time you cried?

often. two days ago? emotional regulation is a skill that im learning late in life so crying is a very common simperator occurence, but i'm learning! (also the 12 hour shifts get to me)

Do you have kids?

no, i don't really have any plan to have kids either. but theres a dilemma here because i REALLY want to be a grandma!

Do you use sarcasm a lot?

only jovially or if i find myself really miffed, i mostly try to be earnestly sweet and goofy without sarcasm since i get really embarrassed if my tone is off and it falls flat ://

What’s the first thing you notice about people?

their noses! i love noses, especially if they're unique, i love how they frame faces and that tends to be where my eyes go!

What’s your eye color?

grey!

Scary movies or happy endings?

i love both of them equally but it depends on who im with the most! when im with my friends i love talking through horror flicks and when im alone i like to curl up in bed watching pride and prejudice for the 4th time in a month lol

Any special talents?

i haven't been to a hair salon in YEARS, i always cut and colour my own hair and, at least to me, i've never been disappointed with my own work!

Where were you born?

somewhere in the mountains in canada

Hobbies?

i love baking, gardening, sketching, and i'm getting into pottery and ballet!

Pets?

one old dog, he turned 14 this year! he's my little stinker and my little puppy forever <3

What sports do you play/have played?

basketball >:) i was on my school's team for a season and mostly just spent the whole time gossiping with the other team instead of actually playing lmao

How tall are you?

5'7!

Favorite subject in school?

i ADORED my world religions class, the teacher legitimately changed my life for the better, and there was a real relaxed sense of peace and camaraderie even if we were from different """cliques""" (a stupid not real concept)

Dream Job?

a florist or a professor and a writer on the side. or one of those people who live in national parks and work there! books and plants is my goal!

tagging: @jossambird @tasty-ribz @rightintheghoulies @the-hole-in-terzos-shoe, and everyone else i missed or forgot the urls for because im working rn!

Thank you for the tag @conjuring-ghouls ! Sorry it took forever. 😅

Are you named after anyone?

No, but I was very close to getting named Hey You.

When was the last time you cried?

Uhhh, maybe two days ago. 🥲

Do you have kids?

Yep.

Do you use sarcasm a lot?

I sure do, even more when I’m around family and friends. I also have to catch myself when I do it to rude customers. Whoops.

What’s the first thing you notice about people?

Their looks, like their clothes and how they present themselves. I feel energies and I tend to pick up things like their moods, little quirks, etc.

What’s your eye color?

Green.

Scary movies or happy endings?

I lean more towards scary movies, but it depends on what I’m in the mood for. I hate romantic movies. 🙃

Any special talents?

I don’t think so. I cake decorate for a living if that counts?

Where were you born?

In the boot of Louisiana.

Hobbies?

Reading, writing, gaming, music, creating art, listening to podcasts and watching Markiplier and a few others on YouTube.

Pets?

One big pupper.

What sports do you play/have played?

None, not a huge sports person. I used to play cabbage ball and kickball with friends and cousins if that counts.

How tall are you?

I think 5’3”.

Favorite subject in school?

Mostly art. I did enjoy environmental science too.

Dream job?

Definitely a tattoo artist. I apprenticed for about a year some years ago, but work and life got in the way and I had to let it go.

Tagging: @crooked-hourglass @ramblingoak @belissmatopolina @ghoulzs @thenick100 @ghost-bc-gf-enjoyer and whoever else! No pressure at all!

[saturno-sol]

How do you all have the energy to post on multiple platforms??

What sort of witchcraft do y’all practice, who do I need to sacrifice to so that I’m able to continually interact and engage with more than one social media platform at a time

[bri-of-the-shire]

ok, so ive had a very busy week. might need to open up some emergency commissions for the holidays.

my car fried itself when we were trying to take a roadtrip to a friends house. it had been having some issues with oil that no one could figure out, and that day, it ran out of gas before it was empty, started rattling like crazy, engine light came on, and i had a flat all at once. i filled up the flat but my psi measurer was an electric one that was dying, and when it read the air was at 30 psi, the tire exploded.

we were gonna change the tire, but half of the jack kit was missing from the car. we were at a gas station, trying to get ahold of a tow, and a AAA guy just happened to see us and changed the tire to a donut for free, which was very sweet of him. i filled up on gas, but the car was still rattling, and the check engine light was still on, so i headed to the nearest shop.

they got a new tire for me and diagnosed my car, saying they wouldnt have the part til tomorrow. we were in the middle of nowhere, but my roommate had a cousin who lived a couple hours away. they wouldnt be able to pick us up til past when the shop closed, and the town was so small, there werent even uber drivers. when i asked if it was ok for us to get the belongings we could out of our car and wait outside the shop, he offered to drive us somewhere safer, and got us to a well lit restaurant to stay for the couple hours it took my roommate’s cousin to get there. things couldve ended very differently as we were two Obviously Stranded Obviously Queer women in some small town in the south but everyone there was genuinely so kind to us.

next day, the car parts came in and they realized that wasnt the problem. it wasnt something they could fix, but they knew i was a couple hours out, so i found a tow in town to take it to the dealorship since theyd have the specialized shit. the tow couldnt get the car picked up that day, so we had to wait another day.

that night, my phone died, so i plugged it in and forgot about it and watched a couple movies with my roommate and her family. when i went to check on my phone after 5-6 hours, i had over 20 missed called from my parents, and nearly 70 messages from them and anyone they could get ahold of to text me, and my dad bought plane tickets for 5am the next day bc they thought i was dead. which like. it had been a very stressful two days ofc, and i probably should have my phone on me, but ffs i was out for an evening after a very stressful 36 hours. i’m glad they care, its just. a very extreme reaction.

i woke up early the next day to stay on the phone with the towing company, and eventually my dad got in and met at the dealorship and found out the issue was gonna be a LOT steeper than originally intended. like $850 was quickly turning into thousands.

we met my dad for dinner, talked to him about options, and yesterday, we traded it in, and used the money go towards a new one. also had to pay another few thousand out of pocket, but. at least there wouldnt be as many issues and possibilities for breaking down again like this.

drove about 3 1/2 hours home and i finally slept in my own bed again for the first time all week last night.

christmas is in about 15 days and i dont know if i’ll be able to get gifts for my family, friends, or my roommate’s family who put us up for almost a week on short notice. i know im in my 20’s and no one really expects anything big from me esp after this but. idk. i’ll try to finish up some work and at least get a paycheck in time for utilities.

[finalboyfinn]

Who do you think initiates the first move between bruce and vance and what do you think they did?

hiii anon! thank you for this ask. sorry i took so long with it... weirdly i havent thought much of this 💭💭 i have this own little idea in my empty hollow head. anyone else should say their own take on it frfr im... rlly tired rn ill edit this in the morning after i post it ,,, which is brave im afraid this whole thing is incompetent.

it's... technically bruce? he plays the long game. bruce is a gentleman, charming fella. a gentleman who thinks subtlety goes a longggg way. he's a hopeless romantic too. i hc that vance isn't that good at determining what's platonic and what's romantic so bro just thinks bruce is just showing more care this week than others (he doesnt want to give himself false hope). bruce picks flowers out of his mother's garden, compliments vance all the time, is by his side the majority of time basically helping vance do stuff that he is perfectly capable of.

("...i can fix my own damn choker." vance grumbles, standing still as bruce clasps the green choker back around his neck. "i know! i just like doing things for you." bruce grins, fidgeting with material before backing off. not before styling his hair back in place though!)

because that's what bruce has been taught to do if you like someone and BOYY, does he does he in— cautiously. like petting an unfamiliar dog for the time, you let it smell your hand first. and that goes on, and on, and on til vance finally gets the hint when bruce gets a little miffed by vance's lack of... reaction ☠️☠️

"do you like me or something?" vance says, staring at handpicked bouquet of daises in bruce's hand like they're from a different planet. the flowers torn up by their roots, dirt scattering on the pavement. bruce could SCREAM.

"well, yeah." he's smiling but it's strained.

"why didn't you say something?"

"i thought i was being really obvious."

"you weren't." he was. he really was.

"uh, i dunno what to say, man. i'm really sorry, we can forget—"

"we should go out." vance cuts through bruce's fumbled apology. he's deliberately not looking at bruce's face. he's staring at slowly drooping flowers like they've personally offended him.

"what?"

"friday. go see a movie. together. i'll pay."

bruce accepts of course but all he's really thinking is 'i could have done that the whole time?'

[wistfulrat]

a 4-part rec list of my fave drarry fics - the thrillers, dramas, soft bois, and wankbanks getting me through 2020′s shitstorm

[ for my fellow fledgling drarry stans bc im also very new here! like tbh i think the last fic i read pre-pandemic was a 1D ziam series back in 2013?? lmao god. but alas, after reading HP fanfic for the first time during lockdown & subsequently 300+ drarry fics since then, it is time. it’s time to be embarrassing about it online via lengthy rec lists. and if you end up loving any of these fics? follow the authors, leave kudos & comments on their work, send them nice msgs bc they do all this shit for free & that’s wild ]

part 1: thrillers

mood: for when i need something exciting, haunting, immersive, fast-paced

includes: case fics, mystery fics, plotty adventures!! expansive world-building, time warps, magical theory, wizarding politics!! the thrill of a chase!!! you’ll get your drama & spicy sex but mostly it’s the unravelling that hooks you. because for these?? you’re here for the ride, bitch.

Shibboleths by @lol-zeitgeistic​​ - 100k - E Douglas Adams sci-fi fantasy rom-com wet dream. i'm mad about how good it is. the boys are hogwarts professors and something Scary Big is happening in the magical world and the Dursleys are here?? i audibly gasped, i laughed, i remained on the edge of my fucking seat the whole time

Hermione Granger's Hogwarts Crammer for Delinquents on the Run by @waspabi​​ - 93k - T canon divergence excellence!! jkr*wling is punching the air rn. harry doesn’t learn he’s a wizard till he’s 17 and he’s Miffed. voldy is ruining everything, the Order is underground. hermione’s got her own band of rebel teens. also draco’s here and he's very gay for harry and very mad about it. road trips, tent sleeping, hijinks, guerilla warfare, seizing the press, feisty kids out to fuck ur shit uP while flirting a little. this is honestly an all-time fave.

If an Injury Is to Be Inflicted by @shealwaysreads​​ - 45k - E ANARCHIST DRARRY IS GOD TIER and the pacing here is relentless. it’s a post-war hellscape and harry’s missing and draco is scheming. it’s violent, it’s sexy, it’s tightly written, it’s got observations on the cost of survival and revolution, it’s brilliant.

Azoth by @lol-zeitgeistic​ - 88k - E 8th year magical theory time and the boys are Ambitious in a hot-mad-scientist kind of way. harry is a late-bloomer Swot and has a heart-boner for genius!draco and draco tries not to have a gay panic about it?? there’s animagi, alchemy, poetic theories of change!! & lots of bird metaphors. immaculate

The Boy Who Only Lived Twice by @letteredlettered​​ - 54k - E a spy and his handler ohmygoD I'm a hoe for missions of the impossible sort and secret identities!! & the unravelling of said identities!! the need to be seen at war with the need to escape. draco & harry as equals, evenly-matched and whip-smart and terrifying on the battlefield?? incredible

Who We Are in The Shadows by @quicksilvermaid​ - 100k - E an ex-auror. an elusive investigator. boys Gone Rouge. it’s very hot of them in a magical-bourne-identity kind of way. powerful werewolf harry + intelligent draco + outmaneuvering bad guys outside the law?? there’s a reason you’ve seen this specific creature fic in every drarry list bc IT’S FUCKING EXCELLENT IS WHAT IT IS

Turn From Stone by @harryromper​ - 45k - M post-war hogwarts castle-magic turned malevolent as shit and it might be lost forever except!! hermione’s going to save the day and her plan’s seedy as hell but the DA gang + draco are all here. an adventure fic feat. the black lake but even more ominous, haunted common rooms, libraries of death, flying daggers, deception, ancient spells, drarry fighting for their lives but in a hot way.

The Art of Shadow Boxing by @tommylane​ - 178k - E draco’s a professional fighter in Thailand and oh shit harry’s here but he hasn't seen harry in 7years?? and what the fuCK happened during their AU horcrux adventures with the trio that made draco disappear to Thailand?? something is amiss. mafia moms, wrestling sexily, so much pining, flashbacks, pentagrams. draco needs a hug.

The Fall of the Veils by @letteredlettered​​ - 60k - M "muggles find out about wizards, wars are fought, apparition is abolished, political conspiracies abound, draco is asexual, and harry has legilimency sex with him” -- IS THAT SUMMARY NOT FUCKING WILD I WAS HOOKED. the scale of this fic is breathtaking and makes you appreciate the labor of world-building in genre fics bc the political and moral complexities of this fic, bitch??? lives rent free in my head

REVOLVELOVER by @firethesound​ @lol-zeitgeistic​​ - 46k - E hit-wizard harry and anti-government extremist draco!! ethics, political corruption, car chases, subterfuge. and god the mood of this fic. the characterization! weaponized-stoic-hurting harry. obsessive-anarchist-yearning draco. carnal, us-against-the-world kind of love. hmm I would simply die for thEM.

Like Clockwork by agentmoppet - 40k - E curse-breaker draco and unspeakable harry!! they’re both hoes for puzzles. harry has a Secret and broods a lot. draco is pissy about it. they’re both too clever for their own good. featuring mysterious objects with a side of trust issues and wanting to murder your crush.

Burn the Curtains and the Wine by @nerdherderette​​ - 24k - E mr. and mrs. smith but it’s harry and draco and it’s exactly as hot and exciting as it sounds. the secret lives of married assassins feat. car explosions, sexily dueling in the desert, draco wielding muggle weapons!

In The Hand by aideomai - 28k - T HELL YEA DRARRY MULTIVERSE BITCHES LOVE THE DRARRY MULTIVERSE. harry’s been missing for months and now we’re dabbling in other dimensions, messing with time travel, racing against the clock, meeting every version of drarry you’ve ever read about. fics within a fic!! god I love it I would read anything aideomai writes tbh, they invented thrill and they do it with less than 30k words?? the talent

Crossing Lines by ren @alcoholicrevo - 48k - E smuggle rings, undercover investigations, draco being hot, harry being flustered by draco being hot -- all of this taking place on a swank train with themed sections and everything. it’s magical murder on the orient express time, bitch!!

Tales from the Special Branch by @femmequixotic​​ - 1.2m - E a 5-part, multiple pov, behemoth of an auror-fic series worthy of its hype bc you know what? it truly Has It All - murders, drama, sex, treason, spooky magical shit, political conflict, drama-ridden relationships, a truly complex & full-bodied cast featuring the Hot Slytherins. jkr*wling fucking WISHES she had the range

[part 2: dramas | part 3: soft bois | part 4: wankbanks]

[niskotus]

have u ever elaborated further on the pseudo-apocalypse thing or are u keeping that secret for rn.. cause i would love so much to know more i love ur characters and wanna know more abt the setting soooo bad

I DON'T THINK SO ACTUALLY .. i dont know how much i can go into it rn but i can share some tidbits at the very least >:-)

➜ the reason i say the sun's "bleeding/crying/dripping" etc instead of just one is that every character views it differently and feels of it differently (e.g damir thinks the sun is alive, endre thinks the sun is drooling) - the only real more common threads are just "well Something's coming out of it" and "i think things might end soon" ➜ the setting itself is a living thing ➜ weather is kind of a nightmare. "false" snowstorms are common and can happen in near-tandem with heat waves. (false as in everything's been covered in snow for what feels like forever now, but that doesn't mean it's always cold). sometimes it rains ice crystals that dye the entire sky blue or red for days, sometimes the sky just does that unprompted. trying to keep track of weather gets really ridiculous very frequently ➜ because of all this animals have also had to adapt very rapidly, which means a ridiculous amount of animals both Very rapidly evolved into opportunistic carnivores and are Very miffed at the general state of things. humans obviously aren't the first choice, but they certainly are more of a choice than before. also really excited to show what regular animals look like in this world ➜ 80% of the cast wearing ridiculous leather is mostly an aesthetic choice but also because of that. damir's layered outfit is something that helps him stay grounded and something that protects him, atleast a little. endre's does nothing he's just like that ➜ generally just. very, very disorienting to exist in and only becoming more like that as time goes on. whatever the sun is doing often makes the air very thick and fetid in the same way a high fever does. everyone's a little strange ➜ alternate world & time's a little weird and i don't have a strict timeline down, but this is all pre-(atleast mainstream) internet and tube tvs, landline phones and phonebooths are thriving

THANK YOU SO SO MUCH ALSO that genuinely means the world to me .... im a little skittish and lost 24/7 but people have been very sweet about this story and the stuff i make and it warms my heart everytime

[gayregis]

blood and wine rewrite au basic layout

i already posted something like this before but i cant find the post so im just rewriting all of this from the top of my head

everyone’s repurposed roles:

geralt - he’s still a witcher. he’s geralt of rivia. obviously. i don’t have time or interest to think about how to rewrite the entire witcher 3 game to be lore-friendly, but i assume there would be less triss and more dandelion involved in it. for this let’s just take him as geralt having done everything in tw3 but with the personality of geralt from the books because geralt from the games doesn’t have much of a strong personality good for writing or thinking about.

regis - a bitch. nah jk. he’s same regis but just what he was like 100 years ago when he got his head cut off. he’s less spiralling-into-doom than he was then, and is less desperate and hopeless overall, but is slowly getting there once again. he doesn’t remember anything about learning from his mistakes and becoming a good person, because this regis didn’t get any of that. to this regis, it’s like no time has passed at all since he died, and he’s ready to start partying again without any thought of the consequences. he’s moved to toussaint because everyone’s already tipsy there and the north is plagued by war so it’s not a really great source to be drinking from (like if there was a sewage leak near the vineyard you sourced your wine from). he doesn’t remember anything about maturing up or about becoming a surgeon or about the hansa, so that sucks.

dettlaff - not a fucking maniac. actually a character geralt will likely spend a good amount of time talking to. total character overhaul because he does not have a personality in the actual DLC. he arrived in toussaint because he had heard that regis had returned and wanted to fix things wih him, he had previously left him.

syanna - not a fucking dumbass, yet still naive in her own way due to being blinded with the promise of power. in this, she is planning to stage a coup on the duchy (because she is the older sister, so it IS her right by law) and she supports regis’ slow dive again into uncontrollable insanity because it helps her prop up rumors that her sister’s reign is ineffective against real threats and is cursed. but this alliance does not go as she planned...

orianna -  in this, she is the owner of a gladiatorial school (instead of an orphanage), and is still like in canon a wealthy and influential individual of beauclair, yet reclusive from human society. she is regis’ best friend and goads him on, because she never fixed her own issues with alcoholism and now is elated to have him back and forgetting that they had disagreements which drove them apart in the first place. they’re best friends (NO romance) and it’s just good to see how insanely different orianna and geralt are because they’ve both been regis’ close friends at different points in time.

the purpose of this:

fix regis’ relationships with the vampires. he slowly drove all of his good friends away by going off the deep end and many are likely wondering whatever happened to him. but books regis would never consider partying like that again, so we bring the party regis back and then slowly de-escalate him into normal books regis again, and we finally get closure with him and his old friends.

cool dramatic stereotypical vampire shit. i’m talking about a final battle or conversation in a giant dark castle with large open windows and billowing drapery.

regis’s hairstyle

give syanna actual agency as a character and give her motivations that extend beyond pure revenge (although they are related to revenge) and make her more unique so she is not just a ripoff of renfri. 

demonstrate anna henrietta and geralt’s relationship as it was in the books. he was genuinely intimidated by her and i interpret him as being jealous of her relationship with dandelion, so he in practice was quite withdrawn around her as she was her overemotional and embellished self

give dettlaff an actual character, holy shit. i hate how sorely underdeveloped he is in the game. i understand why because it’s not meant to be writing, it’s meant to be a video game, but come on. i hate having the vampire with the cool character design be the ultimate villain of the whole narrative. in this, he’s someone geralt can talk to and sees himself in. he’s emotionally mature and doesn’t mix with the other vampires. since we already know what regis is like, we don’t have to sit through dettlaff making excuses for him and trying to describe what his character is like. we also get a better view of regis’ past through dettlaff’s lense. 

give orianna an actual character, holy shit. i hate how they didn’t even try with her and just used her as a “surprise, she is quite evil!” gimmick. have her actually have a larder for blood that is lore-friendly yet still jumps out at the audience as morally wrong.  give her more personality and development.

examine regis’ backstory without actually getting into every single year of those 4 centuries. we can examine how it started good, turned bad, went worse... there’s a lot of loss involved and i think this would be nice to process it.

roughly what happens (under cut because if i ever do write this fic out, this is spoilers, literally the synopsis of the whole thing):

anna henrietta sends envoys to geralt. they establish that the duchess has no conflict with geralt and that her conflict was with dandelion, only. she has requested his help because he effectively dealt with many monsters while he was in beauclair and established a trustworthy reputation (also, he’s famous, and toussaintoirs are superficial). instead of the beast of beauclair killing particular victims, it’s the countryside which has been plagued by vicious attacks of the devil knows what.

geralt arrives and examines the scenes of the attacks. the sincere majority of the victims are alive, so he speaks to them. they remember nothing, but woke up with their village fucking absolutely trashed and with vomit everywhere. they all have wounds on their necks. geralt thinks he knows what’s up, but is reluctant to deal with it because of his memories of regis, who he misses

damien de la tour is assigned to geralt as a sort of backup. they argue and geralt manages to get him to stay put in beauclair while he rides to a village they believe will be attacked next. it’s not even a full moon so the vampires don’t even come out in their bat form (disappointing) but instead just mesmerize their way in in humanoid form. dettlaff sneaks up on geralt who is (ahem) staking out the situation, and is like hey dont kill regis hes not evil hes just misguided!! and geralt is like REGIS? EMIEL REGIS? THTS WHO’S LEADING THEM? i ..... i know him.... and dettlaff’s like what the fuck how... then they get caught and regis is like oh hey dettlaff who’s this guy and geralt feels very left out :( and also sad bc regis doesnt remember shit and geralt even lists the hansa members by name and regis is still like O_O ok yeah im just going to hypnotize you to get lost ok goodbye! but dettlaff prevents him from doing this and they both get thrown out of the party.

after the party geralt is a mess and is like wtf so hes back and what... how... huh... and dettlaff doesnt know how he returned or why he returned either but they compare geralt’s knowledge of how regis died with dettlaff’s knowledge of how regeneration works and they figure out that regis just regenerated from his past body and that’s why he doesn’t have any of his memories from when he turned good.

then they eavesdrop a little more and find out that syanna has been talking to regis and making deals with him (its... not really like she thinks, regis really hasnt been doing anything he doesnt want to. shes just like “hey can you attack this village here” and regis is like yeah i was gonna host a party there tomorrow night ...) so they are like who the fuck is this woman and track her down to her base of operations, and then they find out that THEY got followed by damien de la tour, who identifies her as sylvia anna. geralt is a little miffed on behalf of dandelion that damien seems to be so close to anna henrietta but i digress.

geralt reports his findings to the duchess but does NOT mention regis because the duchess knows who regis is. then we get the same vampire talk from canon b&w where the duchess and damien are sorely misinformed on every single thing ever.

geralt is defeated and has no idea on how to fix this and hes looking hard into a mirror by candlelight and then decides to go to bed so he turns around and regis is right behind him like hey. cue ‘holy shit what the fuck’ moment and freaking out. regis explains himself and says that he doesnt remember him but the fact that he gave so many specifics weirded him out and he kind of wants to know more out of curiosity. also he wants to talk to dettlaff but feels too bad about how he argued with him like 3 centuries ago that he cant just ask him directly.

so they talk and geralt is all :(( and regis is like ok well. i kinda want to get these memories back because they sound pretty significant and also im pretty miserable. but also im not going to stop partying bc its the only thing that makes me feel alive rn. so long!

geralt and dettlaff talk to orianna and she dislikes them both but still talks to them and then regis materializes and also begins bothering them and its quite civil but this scene just serves to demonstrate how annoying they are as friends lol

there’s scenes where you can either save damien / syanna from being unalived by the vampires’ / regis’ hand, only if you let syanna die will the duchess be mad and accuse you of being heartless like dandelion is and then geralt and the duchess actually get into an argument bc of that comment but geralt ofc loses bc hes scared of her lol

no matter what you get regis his memories back but your decisions to either continue helping him or not is what makes him change or not. even after he gets his memories back (or because he gets his memories back?) he decides to raze beauclair bc hes just so fucking miserable and geralt has to talk him down, if you are harsh and not understanding and shame him etc then he doesnt change, if you condemn his actions but still offer your support then he does.

if you offer your support > geralt talks about the hansa like For Ever and regis then adds in everything and yay regis is back to normal. theres like a wholesome montage of geralt being like “just TRY to sew up a wound i promise you you will be good at it” and regis does and hes splendid at it. regis and dettlaff finally make up and are bros once again. we help orianna with her issues and she realizes stuff but is still going to have a drink once in a while. if syanna is alive she doesnt hate on any of this but just decides to make up with the duchess and then become captain of the guard (damien gets fired for being a dumbass).

if you do not offer your support > regis goes to cry in a delapidated creepy old castle and you have an epic fight (geralt is backed up by dettlaff) and he turns into a bat and geralt almost dies, they manage to decapitate regis again and put him in the ground and set a timer for 50 years

if you redeem regis then there’s an ending scene where the duchess is like “oh regis i didnt know you were in town” and hes just like <:) ahaha... yeah...

cue crying about milva/cahir/angouleme For Ever. maybe link this with the fic where geralt and regis bring them all back as ghosts/real ppl and then they have to deal with those consequences

[husbandits]

i know ive got kind of a lot of projects rn buuuuut think abt the gang joining overwatch....

hana ends up in charge of keeping micah out of trouble, and by the end of it his hair is tied up in ribbons and she's got a full set of nails on him

charles and john watch hanzo practice archery, but when they compliment his aim he gives them a /look/ because he clearly missed the spot he was aiming for by a whole inch and a half

i'm lowkey obsessed abt shipping susan and reinhardt, like he's got a very similar theatrical-romantic vibe to dutch, but with rein it's genuine and he just wants to smother his partner in very open and doting affection. he also gets a little self-conscious because he's a bit older than her and tends to treat her like a princess. also if you think rein doesn't like to get pegged you are 100% wrong

bill is initially really defensive when zenyatta starts following him around, asking him questions abt his feelings, but after a few days when zenyatta finds him in the middle of a panic attack and doesn't tease or make fun of him, just lets him vent and offers sympathy, he gets a little more okay about the idea of opening up about his issues

a lot of ow fic (and my own hcs) puts meals as a communal task in the reinvented overwatch, so im betting simon is a little anxious at first (esp because there's immediately a lot of the gang casually shitting on his skills since in 20whenevever they have easy access to a lot more spices/fresher and better preserved food). you can take my headcanon that he's actually a pretty good cook when he has a decent workspace and ingredients from my cold dead hands tho, and i feel like he'd have a lot of fun with learning new recipes and experimenting with new flavors

sean and jamie are like imediately best friends! mako just kind of takes sean in as another kid to keep his eye on, jamie's just really happy to have someone who doesn't make him feel stupid for not knowing/still learning how to read

related to above- i feel like mako and hosea become united as obligate group-parents, even if they don't exactly get along in other areas. they and ana have tea parties every now and then when they need to unwind (dutch isn't invited)

orville and bastion end up hanging out a lot, if only because bastion doesn't mind having ppl around as long as they don't disturb their plants/bird, and their little garden-area is a very peaceful place to hang out/nap

trelawney is miffed that everyone keeps unintentially making fun of his style, esp. when they call him outdated, so eventually he gets genji to help him modernize his look. he doesn't go as far as genji wants, but his haircut, makeup, and pretend piercings look punk af

arthur takes to spending his time in solitude, drawing the odd shapes of the omnica around him and trying to come to terms with where they are. he spends a long time, at first, in the infirmary as angela helped him overcome his tb and now he has a little bit of a crush on her, even if she probably doesn't return it (she does, she's just a little distracted/wary of the nightingale effect)

jesse and kieran bond over being horse boys

[thevalleyoftriumph]

someone asked Duckie this but I personally would like a second opinion from someone whos equally into the fandom as they are. Is ponythe-ytgem a bad person?

im gonna answer this similarly to duckie [also duckie if u see this hi bro hope ur havin a nice day] and also under a cut cos i can ramble a lot

while the term “bad person” is a suggective term that can have very different meanings depending on who you ask, im just going to assume you mean “just a generaly dislikable person for any reason in particular” as most often do

tl:dr, i dont think shes a bad person, per say, and am cutting her a lot of slack due to being young, but i do think she should express her opinions differently and should also get new friends because wow that crowd is so toxic i need a hazmat suit to get close to it.

ok onto the longer portion.

hold on im cold lemme get a blanket

ok there we go back on topic

i dont really know much abt her aside from what i saw from an incident a while back, plus some other things i saw floating around my dash via word of mouth and some longass game of telephone with my own occasional check at her blog. her most major thing seems to have been some encounter with kiingcorrobo [i genuinely cant remember how the blog is spelled so im sorry :pensive:] and her thing abt seamoon. lets talk about seamoon first, then well talk abt the other stuff.

anyway while im personally a little more biased to dislike her [she did apologize for what she did however so ill try not to let this cloud my judgement overall] and because shes a minor like i am [and if i remember correctly around my age? maybe older but im unsure and i dont feel like goin to her blog rn] im not going to be as harsh as i usually would be when dealing with just some random person on the internet whos an adult. because children wouldnt know better either way.

anyway i do personally believe that her opinions abt seamoon are valid but she could possibly go a better way about it.

her whole issue with seamoon is. fine. i get it, you dislike a ship due to personal reasons, you dont owe anyone an explanation aside from “i just dont like it” and as long as youre not a dick over it, i dont see the issue.

i do think she could go about it differently [she once said there was no proof? i think? dont quote me on that my memory is bad] and that it could just be “ohh a best friend stare” despite how heavily its hinted at [i remember that one a lot better cos it got me a little miffed ngl] and like. ok. fine. just acknowledge that its very strongly hinted at and then go on your way, you dont need to insist its not real.

HOWEVER. 

i have repeatedly seen people get angry and violent with her over this. yes, she definately could have gone about expressing her opinions better. yes, she shouldnt disreguard any sort of wlw rep or coding because she doesnt like it for whatever reason. ill admit that much.

but that does not, ever, at all, make it okay for people to have treated her, a CHILD, presumably, the way they have.

people are entitled to their own opinions as long as it isnt harming anyone! and if someones opinions seem a little off, you dont immediately attack them, especially if theyre someone thats young and probably dont know the full extent of what theyre thinking. you tell them what theyre doing and why its wrong or just iffy in general, and help them grow from that. we are human, humans naturally grow to better themselves when given the chance, and if theyre never given a chance to grow from the past, then they cant ever grow up. if you want her to grow up, then give her a fucking chance. 

now. lets talk abt the kiingcorobo thing.

from what i know; someone told kiingcorobo that she supported whitewashing and was homophobic, i believe.

now, im not a person of color so i am not really inclined to talk abt whitewashing, all i can say is that its terrible and fuck anyone who does it, like honestly if you whitewash u have. no rights.

so i cant talk abt this topic much aside from; whitewashing is terrible, dont do it, but i personally have no idea when she [pony] mentioned it at all and honestly im not too willing to go searching thru her blog fo hm. actually no im pretty hung up on this brb

ok no she hasnt mentioned it as far as i can tell. so im unsure on those claims and im more inclined to give her the benefit of the doubt, being a minor and all, and while minors are not autmoatically excused from doin bad shit that just means they still have a chance to better grow from that, so. yea.

anyway onto the topic im actually able to talk abt. the homophobic comment.

lgbt people can be homophobic! wow! doesnt matter if its internalized or youre just genuinely an asshole, lgbt ppl can in fact be homophobic. bi/pan ppl, gay ppl, trans ppl, no one group of the community is completely pure from that. thats just a fact.

however, due to the issues shes had in the past with the seamoon thing, i do think ppl are just taking that as her one defining personality trait. theyre probably seeing that n twisting it wayyy outta proportion.

thats my general thoughts on her and wow this is way longer than i had originally hoped and this reads more as an analysis of her as a person rather than my general thoughts but. eh what can you do.

oh but i do think she could get better friends lmao, shes in such a toxic crowd and for someone so young i feel genuinely so bad for her. 

[gothamcityneedsme]

Next time you answer the phone, pretend you're a fax machine and just start screaming. Or, y'know, actually have a panic attack. A few of those seems to get through 'only call me if it's an URGENCY' to pretty much everyone who is likely to call me and isn't some turd from the government.

This guy is a friend of mine that I do like talking to, it’s just that i…dislike phone calls.  we’re better friends IRL imo, but we can’t see each other often so phone calls are the middle ground.  So i dont want to actually be m ean to him >

and I would end the call sooner, but he’s like…swamped by work a lot (he’s working close to 80 hour weeks rn) and so i like…am one of the few outlets he has rn and I dont want to take that away from him because, geeze, the guy gets stressed (tho he’s been better and they’re cutting down on hours, down to 70!! wow!! lol!) but still.  I wanna help my buddy.

We started talking about robots so it was redeemed a bit. I got to wax poetic about the movie ‘Her’, which is always a positive for me lol.

I just do also get tired and I’ve spent all day talking to strangers about stuff I only half-understand so im totally out of spoons now.  but will have to talk about my roommate that im currently a little mad at so im saving the last half a spoon i have to fake not being slightly miffed.

[thebaybae]

aight so here is the story

I am honestly so pissed and appalled rn that I find myself getting even more pissed off as time passes???

this is what went down this morning;

I showed up for my lesson, Rocky was a bit off. He just felt very short strides and unwilling to go forward. We (me, trainer, lady I ride with) went into the derby ring (rare, it’s locked, lessons only, super fancy deep squishy footing) my trainer’s boss (so my barn’s ‘head trainer’) is teaching someone else in there.

Trainer asks me to trot Rocky by her both ways. He feels worse, bobbing a little and obviously limping. She and I agree he’s off but not horribly. I say that I will take him home and talk to my shoer. (SHOER SITUATION: feet got done on Tuesday a mere FOUR weeks after getting them done prior. My farrier flies in from out of state usually ever six weeks but had to come early because of a conference he was doing down here. I was miffed but understood, there wasn't much trimming needed. Rocky has CHRONIC thrush we have mostly eliminated but it’s trying to cling to life in his left front. Shoer went ahead and cut out the infected area of the frog and told me he would need some treatment there. When he was sore this morning I figured this was why and had planned to pack it, bute him and give him a few days off)

So trainer and I come to an agreement here but before I can step forward or hop off, trainer’s boss storms over from her lesson and in front of everyone starts loudly chewing me out about how my horse’s feet are ‘too small’ the shoes are ‘too short’ his feet are trimmed to short, ‘I've told you before’ ‘he’s DEAD lame’ blah blah blah and I’m sitting there like??? it’s not that bad?

She HATES my farrier. She has turned like 6 clients off from him and had one of her higher end clients take her 4 horses from her barn for a falling out after client started using this shoer.

Anyway I say ‘ok I'm gonna go pack his foot’ as she’s going ‘take IT home, put IT in ITs stall, ITS DONE’ (yeah she kept referring to my gelding as IT and it was weirdly irritating me?)

Anyway I take his tack off and bring him to trainer’s crossties for packing ( I don't have magic cushion) before I can do this head trainer walks up with HER (very expensive) farrier and they start bantering about my horses feet.

She tells him ‘take him up and remove the front shoes and redo them’ and he TAKES ROCKY AND DOES THIS?! I AM THEN SENT A $50 BILL FOR THIS!? THAT I DID NOT ASK FOR OR CONSENT TO...?! She also introduced me to him as ‘this is Kaitlyn, your new client’ HELLO?!

As this guy is talking to me my CURRENT FARRIER CALLS? and im just panicked the trainer called him. I call him back and explain (in distress) and he is luckily very calm and comforting about it but basically defeatedly was like ‘it’s probably easier for both of us if you just do what she wants’

I'm pissed. I DON’T WANT TO PAY $225 FOR BASIC SHOES. I DID NOT CONSENT TO THIS.

EXCUSE ME BUT WHAT THE FUCK?!

Please advise. I am tempted to talk to my actual trainer (a saint, I adore her) that she is about to lose me as a client because I am fucking GONE as in trainer-less or LEAVING THIS ENTIRE FACILITY

to be fair I should have flipped and refused on the spot but I was literally standing there with my mouth gaping in the goddamn twilight zone wondering if this was real life

[neurodivergentchaosking]

Story Time: husband edition

thanks to me reading from blood and ash, i am missing my husband like crazy. I am going to see him in about 18 hours- but thats not gonna help.. let me back up and explain our weird relationship.

2018: left the Navy (medical discharge with so much godsdamnned PTSD) and got a short-lived job at Walmart, thats where we met. what can i say? we found love in a hopeless place.

I knew i was going to marry him the moment i met him. I just fucking new it.Which was annoying cus he had a gf (also short-lived)

I may have hunted him down and did a few tactics to get his attention/ what i wanted- things i have fully confessed to him lmao-. i wanted to be with him.

he broke up with his GF when i was at pride. topless in Seattle <3 (omg post-op i can wall around topless like fucking everywhere). and we com hung out the next day...had very active sex... and then we just never were apart.

We couldn't bare to be away from each other or do anything. being in each others arms felt like home. sounds like a fucking fairytale right? too bad that shit aint sustainable. we eventually moved in and like...absorbed each other...we just smoked weed and ordered doordash. we also have a lot of unresolved trauma that we may have taken out on each other- oh the fun unintentional toxic traits you learn as a survival mechanism of severe psychological abuse-we tore each other apart emotionally

the things is, when i love someone...i love them with all of me.i will do basically anything that i think they need to be happy...i would literally murder for my people i don't give a fuck...but like also... i hate just as fiercely...and because i have trauma brain i cant always access the love and only can find the things i hate about them so i think hate them even though i dont.- *sigh* oh trauma brain, i hate you.

he is also a typical cis male when it comes to sex. clitorus, whats that? -which is insane because it is literally fucking pierced- he was also ROUGH and not in a good way. he was lucky he had such a huge cock and i have an active imagination....and a vibrator

anyways after a month after getting married (courthouse wedding woohoo)...i decided i wanted a divorce. we stayed seperated but in the same apartment- cuz im poor-

in walks Mary, my Ex (not ex at the time) with undiagnosed NPD just begging for a food source.Lets my cat out (that went missing for 8 months) and BLAMED IT ON MY HUSBAND. and my stupid ass believed her.

i barely spoke to my husband after that for months.

i did have an epiphany during a roadtrip through my childhood (Cali)...I wasn't ready to give up on my husband. so i forgave him for everything.

we still have so many fucking issues, and we both decided to be friends for now till we can grow the fuck up and get our heads outta our trauma

but its so HARD. literally!. he comes over every week, we smoke weed, laugh talk cuddle, ug i get reminding of how much i love the way he thinks. hes so fucking clever. he always pulls me tight against him like we can just never be close enough (i feel the same). I love the way he smells! i love that he is the most kind man that has nothing bad to say about people and yet can still admire my utterly savage nature and feel so accepted. 

Ive never felt more seen and more loved- in my life- and its really fucking stupid (ug im bawling RN fml) that i dont get to be with him. that i hafta wait. thats dumb as shit.

theres always so much sexual tension between us, and the way he looks at me makes my heart fucking melt. like last week i was showing him new music and i was singing along and it was MUCH higher than im used to (i may have perfect pitch, but my range fucking sucks) he was just staring at me like i was this precious little angel in front of him (all of these things im incredibly NOT).

Honestly im just waiting for him to go to therapy. thats all its gonna take for me to start things up again....theres obviously a lot more to the story (include my uterus randomly yeeting our unborn child) but ugg u got the story you needed to understand why this stupid vampire porn book im reading is making me crave my stupid soulmate, and im just a bit miffed about it so yall hafta suffer this long ass story thats anti-climactic af. mwahahahaha