#so i'm happy to hear you point it out :')
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how did u learn to paint?? like i just cant wrap my head around it
<3 I love answering asks like this!
You will have to bare with me, I don't save many of my studies, and my files aren't that organized so I don't have as many images as I would like.
The studies I've found most helpful for myself personally with painting are various master studies. (This is also, as always, alongside study of fundamentals.) And always follow a study with self-critique (and, if you can get it, outside critique!)
"Master" in this sense means anyone who you want to learn something from.
One way you can do this is by copying an artist's work directly. This is to try and understand some of their stylistic techniques. Leyendecker, Andrew Loomis, and John Singer Sargent are personal favorites of mine! I try to keep these quick, I'm not trying to get an exact copy.
I also get a lot out of copying photos. In this case, I'm not trying to glean some technique, rather, I'm trying to interpret the photo and explore my own stylizations.
(photo credit mountain men of alaska )
I also really enjoy taking a painting or piece that already exists, and making it "mine" by putting my characters in it haha, which is sort of a combination of master studies and photo studies!
(William Bruce Ellis - Covent Garden (1930)) (Barberini Faun)
And then, in my work that's not a study at all, I'm informed by all of these!
What master studies do is help me refine my style and practice my technique, but also I'm communicating with artists of the past through my art! They're teaching me! And I have so much to learn.
And of course... most importantly... I paint.
a lot.
I don't do as much study anymore, not because I feel I've learned all I need to, but because for work I draw 50+ drawings a week. 'Drawing for work' and 'study' occupy the same space in my brain and I need some fun drawing time!
So to sum up, draw a lot, reference constantly, and copy the people you want to draw more like!
(and, of course, when doing a study off of someone else's work, always give them credit. If it's your photos there's no need.)
#I really tried to pare this one down cause it got LONG#as always I am more than happy to delve deeper into any of these particular points!#I'm always always always happy to explain as much of my process as possible#and I'd love to pass off some of my knowledge to others!#I love to see people creating art and want to do anything I can to help empower people to do so more#I love you mwa mwa mwa#asks#edsheerankinnie#art tips#painting tips#I pretty much wear my influences on my sleeve#like I don't care#I honestly get so so so excited about art I'm like shaking a little#like oh my god#we get to MAKE Things#we get to sit down and through the power of our own hands we get to CREATE#and I get to access the knowledge of humanity. throughout history#I get to reach my hand out and have people who are long gone pass their knowledge on to me.#like come on. that's unreal...#at some point you will unlock this feeling if you let yourself#the feeling of connection over centuries#when you hear michelangelo was so shocked by the lifelike nature of his own sculpture he threw his chisel at it to see if it would move#when you see rockwell's love for simple moments between normal people#when you see cave paintings of a woman and you know she was loved.#you get to fucking connect#and feel human#and it's really special#and it's why I think everyone should draw. everyone should draw a LITTLE#music too#augh I'm emotional
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Late to the game as I’ve kinda been kinda non-here for a minute but I scrolled through the Dot and Bubble tag, and thought I wanted to write this post into existence.
There's this part in Doctor Who Unleashed where RTD says this:
“What we can’t tell is how many people will have worked that out before the ending. Because they’ve seen white person after white person after white person, and television these days is very diverse. I wonder, will you be ten minutes into it, will you be fifteen, will you be twenty, before you start to think, everyone in this community is white. And if you don’t think that — why didn’t you? So, that’s gonna be interesting. I hope it’s one of those pieces of television you see, and always remember.”
And I'm like. Yeah. But the reason this works even as well as it does is largely thanks to the work of the previous showrunner with the previous creative team, which was notably the first era to have any writers of color (amongst other firsts in terms of inclusivity in directors, composer, actors). While Chibnall fumbled whenever he tried to write about race himself, he did have the self-awareness to have Black and South Asian writers writing the episodes where race is the focus (and a female writer for the episode where sexism is a focus; my point is, he seemed to know his shortcomings).
I wonder what the current creative team looks like? (not really, but I wasn't 100% sure for all of them)
To quote RTD:
“...before you start to think, everyone in this community is white.”
This is pretty non-self-aware, right? It's pretty “It is said, and I understand this, there was a history of racism with the original Toymaker, the Celestial Toymaker, who had ‘celestial,’ and I did not know this, but ‘celestial’ can mean of Chinese origin, but in a derogatory way,” right? (from The Giggle Unleashed) It's pretty “and I had problems with that, and a lot of us on the production team had problems with that: associating disability with evil,” right? (from Destination Skaro Unleashed)
—none of which are issues that should be overlooked, but think how much exponentially better they might’ve been addressed if he’d consulted with Chinese writers and wheelchair-using writers before going straight to giving the Toymaker weird fake accents and making Davros walk?
How many Black or non-white people do we think saw the Dot and Bubble script before it landed in Ncuti’s hands?
And this just keeps happening.
And like, from some of the shocked responses I've seen from white viewers to the ending of Dot and Bubble, maybe the episode's unsubtlety was needed? From the way RTD talks about it in Unleashed, the episode was written with a white audience in mind, Baby's First Microaggressions (where of course the microaggressions come from people who are pretty self-admittedly white supremacists). Ricky September, a more seemingly normal depiction of someone in the racist bubble of Finetime, seemed like an interesting element, up until the way he died.
The ending worked for me, because I do think the Doctor's reaction is true to how the Doctor would react. I just keep thinking of how much better the core themes could've been handled by someone with actual lived experience on the subject matter.
#dot and bubble#fifteenth doctor#rtd critical#anti rtd#ricky september#lindy pepper bean#dw negativity#racism#antiblackness#words by seaweed#not to be anti rtd. im just very critical. Anti RTD is just a tag which people use or block#every showrunner has their flaws but RTD is the only one self-righteously virtu signling over NOTHING. which is why im more critical.#plus the on-set sxual hrassment and what happened with Chris Eccleston etc. it vindicates me. idk. not tryna be a hater#ALSO dot and bubble is leaps and bounds better than any racism commentary I expected from Russell T Davies. so theres that.#can you tell I'm shy abt making long posts that someone is likely gonna be not happy about-#I usually search tumblr for posts to rb and talk in tags. but I couldnt find any posts about this this morning! tho I think ppl have since#etc its fine to critically appreciate imperfect media etc I do it all the time (as a Black fan) (who also thinks Rosa has Flaws) etc#I did see someone on twitter pointing out the hypocrisy of all white writers but twitter does not have space to talk about things#also love that The Church on Ruby Road has Mark Tonderai who became the first black director w The Ghost Monument. I love his directing#but that's the Christmas special. it is not part of this season. and honestly fr it's not close to enough#love the inclusivity in front of the camera. lets get some of that in the writing team NOW. it's hurting for it.#bring back Charlene James. can you hear me? was the best episode of Season 12.#the ep felt like a commentary on the “RIP Doctor Who” ppl under every official Doctor Who post? hence social media?#it does work best that way!! it just felt a little off of that way in rtd talking#idk im rambling. I did enjoy it tho. I just wish. but well.
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...yeah they're moving the fuck on.
#we wont hear tommys name after this ep#why are maddie and chin so AWKWARD about this#why does it look like they're keeping more than just the pregnancy a secret?#the universe will bring you someone special#like hes not baking an entire boulangerie AND patisserie because he cant bring himself to CALL tommy?#i'm happy to be proven wrong but also i'm so fucking tired of the hampster wheel#heres to furiously ignoring canon from this point out
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opening the group chat for the first time today and there's like 200 new messages because everyone's Going Through It today it seems but one of my friends dropped 'I'm separating from [terrible boyfriend she's been living with for like eight years] for real this time, I just moved a bunch of stuff to my parents' and I'm losing my mind because y'all the subject changed almost immediately HEY HI EVERYBODY ELSE SHUT THE FUCK UP I WANNA HEAR ABOUT THAT???
#'I moved my stuff and my dog' can't leave the pup behind! 'I had to last winter and it was a big reason I wound up going back' HELLO--#was he holding your fucking dog over your head. I will kill the man?????#I DIDN'T KNOW SHE'S TRIED TO LEAVE HIM BEFORE??#I'm-- so-- okay listen. admittedly I am of course simply nosy. of course I am.#but also I have never liked david Ever. justin and I were LITERALLY talking DAYS ago about Worrying About Her being stuck with him#because she moved TO CALIFORNIA with him and he was being a piece of shit then and she had NOBODY out there#and now they're in denver and like. it's his house it's his money etc etc it's a really... logistically difficult situation#but at least she's made some friends in denver and convinced her parents to move out there so she's not COMPLETELY unsupported#like she was in CA#my point is: I'm nosey but I'm also INVESTED. I fucking hate this guy darling I've wanted you to leave him this entire goddamn time#she's talked *a little* about problems with him before but also we've been around him before and he's just generally awful#and it's. like. I'm so so so fucking glad you're moving in with your parents but also. genuinely are you OKAY--#MAN AND ALSO. EVEN IF IT WASN'T 'I HATE THIS GUY AND I'M WORRIED ABOUT WHAT THE BREAKING POINT WAS--'#THIS IS A SERIOUS LONGTERM RELATIONSHIP? IT ENDING IS A BIG DEAL REGARDLESS?? WHY DID WE CHANGE THE SUBJECT SO FAST HELLO#.... actually I've identified the source of my Wanting More Details#which is: hey babe are you in a phase of this where hearing about how much he fucking sucks shit would be upsetting or affirming.#because I wanna tell you how fucking happy I am that you're leaving him. because he's a piece of shit and you deserve better than that.#ARE YOU IN AN EMOTIONAL SPACE TO HEAR ABOUT HOW I AM SCOOPING YOU INTO MY ARMS LIKE THE CAT SAMURAI MEME.#AND THREATENING THIS MAN WITH A SWORD. BECAUSE HE'S TERRIBLE. CAN I GET A VIBE CHECK THERE. SHOULD I WAIT--
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i don't know how to be merely acquaintances when we used to be friends. or i think we used to be. i don't know how to yearn for a simple hello when you've been heaping your affection on me months ago, and i don't know how to talk to you when you won't say anything. when suddenly it's all about me. you know i have nothing to say, you know my brain is void of everything but horribleness and i cannot tell you about my day because i don't even know about my day. i cannot tell you about my day when i know you won't listen, when i know you'll apply your philosophy to my world and don't believe me when i say that everything is terrible. i don't know how to be the person you seem to think i am, or the person you want in your life. i don't know if you want anyone else in your life now that you're in love and sappy, found another recipient for your affections, leaving me empty and wounded and yearning.
you said you missed me. said it many times, while i was gone. now i'm back, have been back, and i wonder how you missed me, why you missed me, when you won't talk to me. i think you mistook missing for worrying. i think you mistook caring for a feeling of obligation. i think you like missing me more than talking to me.
and i think i can't breathe with how much that hurts
#how do you miss me when you won't talk to me? how do you like me so much and then go to just. not?#how did i let you in when i try so hard not to let people do that because i know that once they get past the walls all i'll be left with#is the idea of them rotting and withering inside me. polluting the space i create to keep myself safe.#why does everyone leave? leave in silence too. leaving behind so many questions and so many words engraved in my brain#i am so tired of *grieving* when those i grieve are still alive and well and thriving and i'm reminded that it's versions of myself#that i'm grieving instead. how do you grieve yourself? how do you not fucking fall apart over it?#just. fucking talk to me. don't make it be true that all i'll ever be is nothingness and the memory of someone you liked once#but never never never liked enough#i'm so so cold already. i'm a shell. i want to be warm again but it always leaves me so hollow and hurting#i grieve the dio who was warm. i grieve them i miss them i am so so angry that he had to leave. to hide. with no way out#i'm happy for you. i'm happy you're happy. but you're no better than anyone else and it makes me want to run away again#but i have nowhere else to run and no one else to be. and it's so fucked that it doesn't matter who i am i'll never be enough#for someone to just. stay. to see me and to stay. to hear me and to sit and listen and just. just fucking stay.#maybe i'm not worth staying for. maybe there's nothing to know nothing to hear nothing to see nothing to listen to nothing to find#maybe all i'll ever get is one/two good months paid for with a lifetime of grief. and i'm at the point where i don't want the good months#anymore with you or anyone else who tears down these walls with affection that is so endlessly addictive and leaves me yearning.#on the off chance that it will keep the grief away too. but that's the thing about grief isn't it? it's here to stay. unlike you#god this is so fucked up and i'll delete this later but for now i just need to. let it out. poe said i should make a side blog for the grie#but poe's not there anymore. poe has stopped starting fires. so this goes on main until shame makes me take it down#blah#personal#not st
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Psst, dunno if you already knew, but askgiegueandcrew is posting again. They're also making a fan fiction reboot of the story. Thought you might be interested. (I do enjoy seeing you go crazy in the tags)
*deep breath*
WHAT
WHYYYYY DIDN'T TUMBLR NOTIFY ME THAT @askgiegueandcrew IS POSTING AGAIN
also yes I'm totally going to check out the fanfic
#okay i am glad ppl enjoy my cogdis tag ranting bc like#since i started cogdisposting i've made an effort to share my thoughts & reactions to All cogdis fan content on tumblr#bc i know it's discouraging when u share the fan art/writing/etc you poured effort into and only hear radio silence#so i decided to Be The Change I Wish To See In The World#plus when certain cogdis blogs disappeared i became a liiiiil bit obsessed with Collecting the fandom lol#and like. CogDis is my favorite game and it's SO underappreciated so i want to help keep its fandom alive#i just really like seeing other people appreciate CogDis too#hopefully my... uh... effusive style hasn't been too offputting to those unfamiliar w/ it lmao#it's kind of a relic of early-2010s online fandom culture -- most of which wore out its welcome and was abandoned as 'cringe'#i'm happy to see that nowadays (at least on tumblr) there's a kind of neosincere re-embracing of that old unabashed expressiveness#(see for example 'cringe culture is dead' 'i am cringe but i am free' etc.)#then again maybe tumblr is just one of few places where that expressiveness never left?#generalizing about social trends without representative data is always a risky business#okay i'm way off track. the point is THANK YOU (anon for letting me know and askgiegueandcrew for continuing this masterful project)#cogdis#...
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so this is probably my best digital painting yet!
reference image is from here (x) I have no rights to it and make no money from this.
#portrait#digital painting#this is very much the closest to photorealism i ever intend to go. not that it is that- i just don't usually get this close.#i did learn a lot!#i hope to use the stuff i learned to make more intentional choices in future#i found out that skin texture is incredibly hard to paint! all I could manage was making it look like she's wearing liquid foundation#i'm also really trying to get the hang of colours! even in this i had to adjust it so much after I'd finished to get it to look less flat#the neck was so hard :( i think it still looks a bit odd#also in the photo shes wearing this beautiful Nigerian dress. but i was so tired at his point it was day 2 of painting for hours#so i gave up on it :/#btw if you are reading these tags (anyone):#none of this is supposed to read as negative or self critical. I just enjoy talking about developing art skills and what's hard about it et#if you have thoughts I'd be very happy to hear from other artists#not particularly looking for advice though. this is just fun for me :)#i didn't intend to paint this actually i was just getting skin tone references for a character#and i got so absorbed into this little practice painting#if i'd intended to post it i would have chosen someone more well known or a model or something#i feel a bit weird about posting a painting of someone i don't know#and idk if she's in the public eye at all#but i doubt this post will be seen by many people so it's probably fine
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help i'm listening to an orchestral arrangement of holiday by green day and i can't deal with it
#it's so disgustingly high up. the melody. that it sounds like pirates of the carribean#like. do you not get the memo to give the melody to anyone but the violins?? give it to the cellos or the trombones smh#other than that musically it's really good. BUT the reason i'm on here#is because i need someone less sleep deprived than me to queue up holiday and then more (by 5sos) and tell me is it the same chord#that holiday ends on and more (and bobd) start on??#if so. you know what i'm gonna do#i'm gonna fix this#and i'm tired enough that i feel like i can do better than anything i hear right now#was singing along to my cd in the car on the way back from orchestra and just. singing high harmonies like i'm delta goodrem#because apparently i learned everything i know from her? checks out#but the point is. that's not the main melody#in holiday. or it straight up sounds like pirates or some video game soundtrack#anyway the video is by epic orchestra. you can look it up#they didn't get the memo on how to write bass parts for orchestra apparently. fuck off i learned on teeth (song)#green day#holiday#boulevard of broken dreams#5 seconds of summer#more#silver arranges 5sos#thinking of making it some choose your own adventure between easier/more and holiday/bobd where they can swap next songs#and musically it works perfectly#help i'm listening to their bobd arrangement now and i swear it sounds like on of the triumphant end scenes from pirates#i don't watch enough movies bc it sounds generic movie soundtrack happy. which is stupid. it's boulevard of broken dreams#it's meant to be SAD. just cause it's in a major key ffs#sorry i should shut up and go to sleep#you can ask me about this later#i will post any demos that i make. you might not remember by then#because if i had the word 'soon' in my vocabulary...#just as well no one is relying on me
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i got my order of the persona cafe charms today!! theyre so cute and the colors look great on them!! i love the little bonuses too 😭😭 thank you so much !!
ahh i'm really glad to see everything arrived safely! thank you so much for buying from me ^^
#signed sealed delivered#duskerot#postcards#i'm always trying to make the colours of my designs as vibrant and poppy as possible#despite how much cmyk wants to fistfight me. in the middle of the road. in the rain#and i think this whole set in particular looks good all displayed together#so i'm happy to hear you point it out :')#thank you!
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not gonna lie the idea of an oc incarnation is extra appealing because, at least to me, 13-14-15 seem to have this tangible character continuation whereas 12 feels so isolated at times so I'd love to have a 13 that's a more direct continuation
But to loop back to the topic of 'voice', trying to think of actors that feel right seems borderline impossible
#;out of time.#like. I understand why 13 feels like such a reset. its a new era its a new showrunner its a new jumping on point#and props to russell for making 14 feel like SUCH a continuation of 13#15 seems like he might have shades of 12 which makes me VERY happy but I digress#but I am also. endlessly fascinated in exploring regeneration through incarnations. like on a narrative level. you know???#maybe the 'tism is 'tisming idk#but then its like. I am having such a hard time envisioning an incarnation that follows 12 through that lens#like an actor (or actress) I can look at and just go 'That's it. I can hear 'I am the Doctor' through their mouth'#like I can think of like one or two but idk if thats just recency bias at work so I'm just aaaaaaa#anyway Im gonna go play some games to reset the ol' brain I'm lurking tho
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.
#good news first: it's a sunny day! yay!#and it's also Friday!#and we've got a hearing this morning AND then we're going to another courthouse which is supposedly very pretty!#now the mid news: I'm gonna spend all day with *them*#which I am inordinately happy about#but also#now that I know they're ~spoken for~ this is only going to make it worse for me#like I don't look forward to deepening this crush at this point in my life#should I also add that I've barely slept?#like I was dead tired got home past 10 pm#and then couldn't fall asleep until 2 am#bc I kept thinking about it all#(and blasting music in my ears)#where is the bad news you ask?#here ya go#first of all I'm even more nauseated now that I've got this new piece of info#(which at least somehow has the merit of corroborating my theory that it's all psychological/stress/etc)#second of all I'm hyper mad at myself for crushing so hard on a near stranger#and I've got a whole different kind of stomach ache every time I think about yesterday#and how it came out that they've got a girlfriend#third of all I've got no idea what to wear today bc I feel like I've run out of outfits this week?
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TDI Advice wanted!
Hi TD fans! I'm planning a rewrite of TDI, the cast will be 18 for in-universe reasons (think legal contracts, I'm not gonna be weird about them). I'm aiming to make it more realistic and in line with the 2007 aesthetic, i.e era appropriate lingo & references, mobile phones are rare, homophobia is a bigger concern etc, but I'm wondering how far I should take it?
In the end I'll write what I enjoy, but should I lean more heavily into the gritty side of reality TV both on and behind the screen, include more notable sexism, potential slurs and creepy behaviours etc? The point is for there to be believable drama in-universe and the topics planned all have some merit to be present. I have some hard lines I'll never cross (see last tags on the post for those curious) and I want people familiar with the themes to feel seen rather than exploited reading it.
At the end of the day the cast are just youngsters getting to know each other and themselves. I want to humanize them and write believable conflicts without demonizing anyone, it is intended as a character driven story after all. But I also want to know what others think would make for an enjoyable read/take on the show.
The cast will inevitably diverge from their canon counterparts, but I am unsure how to handle certain characters, an example being LeShawna. She's clearly based on a racist stereotype, but her personality, background and lingo are a huge part of her appeal and I'd rather portray her in a better light than change her from the ground up. If you have any pointers I can keep in mind for her or anyone else you think is often portrayed poorly in canon or fanon then please let me hear your takes! This goes for non-TDI castmates as well, even if they don't show up in the story I wanna know what people think does and doesn't work for them and their tropes/traits cause it might still be relevant!
#Td#Tdi#Total drama#Id love any opinions no matter how personal or miniscule. Even outside of fic writing I love hearing theories/analyses.#Also: I already have some things very strongly set in stone so I won't change this project to perfectly appease someone else's vision#Some charas will inevitably be OOC at points but I am using canon information and what we know from stuff like other seasons and their bios#-as my basis for most things. Because while I want to explore some unrelated topics I still want this to be the TD cast. Not my OCs.#That said there will be personal headcanons thrown in. But I hope they flow well with canon and don't stand out as a sore thumb.#Some HCs might replace canon traits but only if I think they were bad/random or underdeveloped.#And if you have songs you think fit the campers pls send them my way! Good character playlists really helps w getting into their headspace#While I am a huge IOTS fan I don't intend to reference it in my work. No gore or character deaths because that stuff is too impactful both-#-for the characters and for the show in-universe. It would derail everything which is what makes IOTS work but is unfitting here.#All TWs will be listed once I start writing. I'm happy to tag niche phobias/squicks/TWs as well so if you're interested in reading but-#-worry that something specific might be included then just ask! No matter how silly it might seem I've got you covered.#What I won't include: SA nor heavy sexism/racism. I might not touch racism much at all outside of beauty standards/racist tv tropes.#Any heavy topic included will be approached with a lot of care and consideration for those affected. There will be 0 shock value inclusions
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So I've been cooking up some alternate outfit ideas for my Lmk sona and this is what they'd look like if they were with the Demon Bull Family! The idea is basically they'd be something of a court musician but it's mainly just a title.
Edit: Added the version without her armor <3
I don't have a concrete story but the initial idea was that cas was friends with swk in the brotherhood days and stuck with dbk after everyone else got sealed away and the whole consumption incident went down since she had nowhere else to go (and conveniently was the only lady around that he could ask for relationship advice when courting Iron Fan). They didn't expect Cas to live this long, only really expecting to have her around through her natural lifespan but they noticed she wasn't aging so now she gets to be their babysitter for date nights! Through the years she's been something of an aunt/sister figure and has become fiercely loyal to the family despite having no desire to take over the world. Redson built her electric bass and the armor she wears over her gems, the Bass has 2 extra buttons on it- the fire button spews fire out of the pipes and the Bull button unsheathes her sword from the neck of the instrument since she can't exactly walk around with a sword on her hip so easy these days. She travels with a heavy metal band across the continent- i like to imagine her intro episode has the crew excited about a big band coming to the city and while they wait they run into redson and annoy him cause he's bragging about getting exclusive vip passes to the show. The crew would expect someone mean from the music and the from the rest of the family but Cas is super welcoming and nice when the crew sneak backstage to bother redson some more XD
#my art#sketches#lmk oc#it me!#Cas#i'm not mentioning connie because they're the same no matter the au#though you can bet they're gonna flip when they hear redson and dbk opened a barbecue restaurant without telling them#they want a taste! Cas is probably the only mortal who can eat the Inferno level simply because Connie will consume it#and also they've been eating this boys cooking for years- they've gained an ungodly spice tolerance#i also like this concept because i think it'd be funny to have wukong be weird about Mk knowing Cas now#and innocently being like 'we should invite them over to hang out- since we're cool with redson why not the token nice one of the family?'#and Wukong is just getting flashbacks to the last time they spoke- right after sealing away dbk and is like 'haha that's nice bud-#'but oh darn they're still touring and won't stick around- she'll probably be leaving the city super soon! what a bummer!'#"all the more reason to get together Right Now!!!' :D '... Thats... GREAT Bud- i can see no reasonable point to argue!' ;w;#Meanwhile Cas is Vibing- big chillin- is only gonna realize her mistake when she locks eyes with swk and they both immediately share a Look#and wordlessly agree to simply Not Bring It Up#i have 1 other design i'm working on- i have the sketch and concept done already#i just need to color and finish it#that one i had the entire outfit And Lore a lot more thought out than this one but i had this idea first and REALLY wanted to draw the bass#im so proud of it you have no idea- the idea of the sword hidden in the bass and the flame jets make me so happy#it feels like something Redson would make- Cas uses it for all their performances they love it so much#And they wear the armor he made Religiously- even if their gems are covered by clothes or theyre chilling at home#unless they just woke up and haven't gotten dressed then they're most likely wearing them- the necklace especially#I still gotta make a regular Ref sheet but these are more fun- i have so much random info about Lmk cas i wanna ramble about >:3
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I wish you didn't think so low about yourself. I worry a lot when I see it cause I can't be around a lot anymore. That and I worry that you might think we aren't friends since we don't chat or write a lot. Genuinely I care about you so much! Whenever I see you pop up after being gone for awhile or when I'm gone it's just like "ah good, Ambie still is around thank god". I love seeing you here even if it's not writing with me. I just enjoy and always have enjoyed having you on my dash. You don't have to post this by the way. I just wanted to let you know how I felt. I mean it when I say this: no matter what you think or how negative you get, no matter what your brain tells you, you are wanted by the people who are here. The ones who matter and care about you, even ones you might not be aware of, want you around. You have become a staple here with your vast array of muses, interactions with others like Tala or Aven, and so much more. It'll be a sad day when you get off for good (or if I leave before you), but just know you'll always be special to many people, but for a fact you'll always ALWAYS be special to me. I wouldn't be here if not for you, Ambie.
anonymously tell me your honest opinion about me
starling, you would be here even if i wasn't. you shine too greatly for everyone not to notice you <3 thanks for creating stories with me.
#sometimes i wish i didn't think so low of myself either ngl#i think i've gotten to a point where i feel like i don't exist to my friends or the dash as a general whole but my friends especially and#that makes me not want to be around ? like i tell myself im so excited to get on then i get on and everyone is so happy and im like oh nvm#and ugh idk when it got like this#but this legit made me cry so much#idk who my friend is anymore and i hate that for me#but on a lighter note#idk how long i'll remain on tumblr but i want to write with you. always even if im not around. im just always tired and depressed#but i get so excited when ppl want to write with me and sometimes i get overstimulated quickly#but believe me when i say that i stalk everyone i write with even if it seems like i'm never around.#i needed to hear this though#i get too in my head about things and psyche myself out#uwu you're too precious#🌺ˑ » petals swaying in autumn breeze.
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going to help out at the school my mum teaches at- yahoo!! :D
#sunkinginforms#I'm literaaallyyy gunna be getting there as the kids are leaving tho#but i WILL be helping out with the breakfast program soon#sunkingrambles#i'm mainly going in there as a one man organization and layout change team- and because i know how computers work and my mum...#uhhhh- she's getting there <3#but yeah- im excited to like- get out..side xD fjjsjskndjdkf#ive been genshin nonstop for the past three days#and liiikkkeee- it's fun- but it's also gotten to the point of brain numbing cuz I'm just using muscle memory at this point#cuz theyre liikke- big main quests that I'm doing so i can't host co-op at the same time- it's a whole thing#I'm more present in gaming when I'm talking with someone- so the podcast on in the background helps a little with that#hdjskdhsjfjjf#this is a lot- but like-- IM EXCITEDDD#i get to make an outfit for tomorrow#maybe I'll convince my mum to somehow coordinate outfits with me-- actually that might kill me- she'd be so cute <3#i love her- she's just- uhhhh NOTHING- I LOVE HER <3#HAPPY INTERNATIONAL WOMEN'S DAY- YOU GET TO HEAR ABOUT MY MUM#AND HOW COOL AND FUNKY SHE IS#also she called 'Jamba Juice' 'Juice Jamba' and that was cute ☆
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hello seb its me the catboy in your head. leave tumblr and get a tasty snack you deserve it
anyway hi seb howre you
Thanks thanks I'll try to do that I really deserve a treat I really do
I'm okay I think. Could be considerably better. A lot better actually but I'm fine I suppose.
↑ the lady
#i have my cat here and she's very cute#so that's nice#but i had this coming the past few days have been really weird#and then my first thought after waking up was 'oh this is not the right body' and then i wasn't really able to look in a mirror all day#cause it just felt wrong like. not my face nope nope who the fuck are you#same with my voice yeah today was a depersonalisation day indeed#for lack of better wording I'll call it that#again i apologize I'll return to being silly and happy in a bit#this was rather nice i think i needed to cry again I'm like if repression was a person so it's good to get all of that out once in a while#future me is gonna hate me for this but i do not care#at this point saying I'm good and everything's splendid is not gonna do me any good either so whatever#oh who am i kidding there's a good chance future me won't even remember this#if i do remember then it'll be classed as a nice experience#vani🐈#sorry again i know it's not really what people like to hear from their friends but yeah i feel better now really
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