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endzithefangirl · 2 months ago

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"I'm gong to put 'being a WAG' on my CV" part 2

Authors note: The part 2 of this to celebrate Maxie winning the Brazil GP! Sorry it took so long, your girl is a STEM student, life got busy. Also now you know the inspo for the TechCEO!Reader.....

Summary: You come with Max to the Brazil GP to see many things: a win, an engineer.... and to have a long chat about Alexa....

Warnings: English isn't my first language, no use of Y/N, female reader, famous reader, swearing, also slight jabs at Max's dad and a few others...

Word count: 2.9k

It was the first race you had come to watch in a while. You desperately wanted to attend the one in Austin, but you got stuck in New York for work. But here you are, in Brazil, being driven to the paddock at 6:30 am for a delayed qualifying session that was probably going to be in the rain. You were worried about many things: the fans, your looks, the fact that Max's dad was going to be there, and the possibility that Max's ex-girlfriend might also be there, although Max reassured you that they were on friendly enough terms where it wouldn't be a problem.

Also, Max winning. He hasn't won since, like, April. He's been doing better recently, but he still hasn't won. And Norris was getting closer and closer to that number one spot. It was an incredibly chaotic morning. In that pre-qualifying session, Max was doing everything to avoid a repeat of the weekend before. On top of that, he was trying to end a months-long winless streak.

Great.

"Well, at least I brushed my hair today..." you mumble, looking at yourself in the phone camera. You still didn't know how to dress like a WAG. You were wearing jeans, the Red Bull jacket Max got you a while ago, some boots for the rain, and your hair down and brushed, which for you is a big thing. You also put on concealer. Miracle.

You were incredibly sexy to Max, though. Unfortunately, you both knew his father and the fashion police on social media might disagree. He didn’t mind, though. He actually preferred you didn’t wear a high-fashion, tight dress. It would have just been a distraction, not to mention, he wouldn’t see you in anything but a hoodie and a pair of sweatpants in the flat anyway.

"Did you know," you say, trying to make conversation to distract from the anxiety, "that your engineer Michael and I went to college together?"

"Really?" he asks, genuinely surprised. If he was honest, he had no idea what the engineers were like outside of their job. The rain was coming down harder, hitting like stones against the windshield.

"Yeah. So, if he got into MIT, he must be good."

Max chuckles, nodding as he looks at the road in front of him for a bit. His engineer was good, but then again, Red Bull didn’t hire anyone but the best and the brightest from the top of the class. He needed people who could handle the race and perform well under pressure. Suddenly, Max turns to you.

"Remind me again, who graduated top of the class at MIT?"

"Allen Chen..." you say, confused.

He laughs loudly before turning back to the road, his eyes fixed ahead once more. He was impressed that you didn’t even have to think for a second before listing them. That was very much like you.

"God, you’re a nerd..." he mutters affectionately with a smile.

"Says you," you laugh. "It's really raining, huh?"

Seeing your reaction to his little joke made him feel all warm inside. Knowing your sense of humor, you had absolutely no idea what you were doing to him. It was also making Max forget about the race, but at this point, he knew it was a rain delay anyway. "Yeah. Feels like we're in a carwash."

"Well, as a big enjoyer of the laws of physics, the best advice I can give you is to go slow on the turns but speed up when going uphill... There is an uphill, right?"

Max actually paused and turned back to you with a grin. It’s funny how you can switch him from hot to cold so swiftly. He still wasn’t convinced you weren’t doing it on purpose. But he couldn’t help but be amused and also impressed. "There are two hill sections, yeah. You sure you never thought of becoming a race engineer instead of becoming a nerdy billionaire?"

"I was gonna be one, but I had to drop out of college, you know, to run the company."

"You had to?" he said with an amused smirk. Max was well aware of the fact that you could buy out the entire campus if you wanted to. But he’d be lying if he said your workaholic tendencies didn’t slightly concern him.

"I tried, but it was really hard. And also, I had to move to New York—"

"Babe, you can run your business in every country imaginable and you’re telling me attending one university was too much?" Max knew he was being a smartass about it. This was more than just the workaholic in you, though. You were also a very stubborn creature, to say the least.

"Okay, I just went to college to get the visa, there, I said it. You happy?"

He chuckles, the car coming to a halt as you arrive at the paddock. The rain is hitting the sides of the car loudly. Max turns to you with a playful smirk. "See, was that so hard? But I’m happy if you’re happy, babe."

You walk out, people with umbrellas waiting for you. There were people taking your pictures as you walk into the Red Bull garage. You introduce yourself to everyone new, and a few of the engineers want pictures with you.

"Hey, we went to MIT together," you say to Michael.

"You remember?" he says, shocked.

"Of course I do," you say before Max pulls you to walk back to the driver’s area.

Max had been watching you talk to the engineer and the others with a faint smile on his face. You had been able to charm all of them within 30 seconds. It wasn’t particularly surprising, but he was still amused. He didn’t think many people realized just how captivating you were.

When you’re done talking to Michael, Max takes you to the Red Bull garage.

"That was easy. How did you make friends with my mechanics so fast?" he asks with a small chuckle.

"You might be a legend to regular people, but I'm a legend to nerds."

"Do I want to know how that happened?" he asks, amused. He knew you had always been incredibly smart and talented, but he had no idea you actually had a bit of a nerd fandom attached to you.

"I’m running a billion-dollar tech company," you say, shrugging.

He looks at you for a moment, his eyes wide. He always somehow keeps forgetting that you’re a goddamn genius. Because whenever he looks at you, he can only think how goddamn beautiful you are.

And yet you say stuff like that as if it’s normal.

You kiss his cheek. "I'll leave you to go ride fast. I'm gonna see if Michael will let me sit with them during quali." Max smirks as you say it before you kiss his cheek. He’d always found your ability to go from incredibly sexy to super nerdy to be insanely attractive. It was one of the things that made him fall in love with you in the first place.

"Sure thing, nerd. Have fun." Max jokes before giving you a kiss on the forehead.

You stayed with the engineers during quali, both because it was super interesting and also to avoid Max's dad in the front of the garage.

And then the rain fucked it all up.

All up.

Max was out of Q2.

He was 17th.

You all saw him and his dad raging in the front of the garage.

The whole quali was a mess, with so many crashes, slips, and generally poor driving in the heavy rain and fog.

As Max got out of the car, soaked and drenched from the rain, he slams the door shut in sheer anger. This whole quali was a shitshow from start to finish. So many poor decisions, so much poor driving. He wasn’t even the worst offender. And he was still only P17. In the garage, he could still hear his dad going on a rage, but he just couldn’t. Max was too annoyed and frustrated to listen.

"Well, that was shit," you say, turning around to Max from where you were sitting.

He didn’t even notice you were nearby until he heard your voice. He turned around to look at you, his hair and shirt completely soaked from rain and sweat. But he couldn’t help but smile at your comment.

“That’s putting it lightly…”

"They definitely fucked you all up with that delayed yellow flag," you say, taking off the headphones and walking over to him slowly. "Save my seat for the race, guys."

He’s about to open his mouth to answer when he finally notices the headphones around your neck and realizes you had actually been in the garage the whole time. Despite how bad the day had been so far, he’s still very impressed that you’re here in the garage and not in some skybox with champagne in your glass. As you come closer, Max can’t help but wrap his arms around your waist and pull you close, not caring how soaked he is.

You hug him back. "It's fine. At least you didn't crash like some of them. Take a breather and then you'll do great at the race later." You take a Snickers out of your pocket. "Calm down now. You're not yourself when you're hungry. Here, eat a Snickers."

He raises an eyebrow as he sees you take out a Snickers from your pocket. It wasn’t the most normal thing to have in a pocket, but somehow it wasn’t surprising at all. It was definitely very you. He also couldn’t help but think that you were probably the type of person to carry emergency snacks around in case anyone was hungry.

“How many of those do you have on you?”

"A few. They're for you if you want them. You know I'm a Mars person," you say, showing him the inner pocket of the Red Bull jacket he got you.

He smirked slightly. The fact that you were so casually admitting to carrying around a little bag of Snickers for him was hilarious. But knowing how much you care and how much you want to make sure he’s doing okay, it wasn’t actually that surprising at the same time.

“Of course you are… Can I have another one?”

He unwraps the second one and pops it into his mouth, chewing on it slowly as he looks at you. Max takes a seat in the chair behind him, his legs spread wide as he leans back, exhausted.

“…come here…” he says, pulling you to sit on his lap. You blink as you realize what he wanted.

He looks at you with a pleading look in his eyes. He usually wouldn’t ask for something like this because he knows you weren’t the type for public displays of affection in the slightest. But for some reason, he was feeling particularly needy, and he knew you would most likely not refuse if he looked at you this way.

He’s surprised at how easy it was to convince you, but it probably has to do with how terrible this weekend has been and how miserable he looks. Or maybe you’re just extra nice today. Who knows…

As you sit on his lap, the other engineers laugh.

"That's right. I know how to code and I get laid," you say, making them all laugh. "You should go have lunch and then be ready for the race."

He hums in agreement. He knew you were right, but he was still very reluctant to let go of you now that he’d finally gotten you to sit with him. He’s well aware that the others are probably still watching you.

“One kiss, please?”

You roll your eyes and give him a quick kiss. You ruffle his helmet hair as you stand up. "Go."

“See you after the race?”

You nod and wink. Max’s heart skips a beat as you wink at him, and he gives you a small smirk in response. There was something insanely attractive about your confidence and how well you handled yourself in this environment.

Before the race, you came to the front of the garage to wish Max good luck. You saw him talking to his dad in Dutch. "Hey, just wanted to say good luck," you say from the door.

His dad noticed you first as you came in from behind Max. Both Max and his dad turn to look at you, Max’s features immediately softening as he sees you. He had to hold himself back from just immediately coming up and giving you a hug… his dad was standing literally next to him… He takes a deep breath, his voice still sounding a bit tense and nervous as he looks at you with a forced smile. “Thanks, babe… Thanks for coming…”

"I'll be with the engineers. Just be calm; it's gonna be a good race regardless."

Jos, Max's dad, nods at you politely. You smile at them both and then leave.

Max watches you leave, his smile turning much more genuine right after. He really did get lucky, being able to be with such an amazing person. Even his dad seemed to acknowledge it with a respectful nod in your direction.

Max looks at his dad, taking a breath as he can somehow feel a lecture coming.

".....Ik denk dat als je het uit moet maken met de dochter van een drievoudig wereldkampioen... Je hebt haar in ieder geval vervangen door iemand die heel rijk is...." his dad said.

Max looks at Jos, his face already turning into a frown as he starts his little speech. He already had his suspicions as to where this is going, but he knew he won’t be able to stop him anyway, so he just listens.

"...... Ze is een beetje raar. Maar... Niet de slechtste die je hebt uitgekozen..... Denk je dat zij mij kan helpen met het installeren van het volledige camera-AI-systeem op mijn nieuwe plek?"

The question takes him off guard a bit. He didn’t expect his dad to actually say something like that at all. He looks at him for a moment, his expression conflicted. On one hand, he didn’t like the idea that his dad wants to ask you something like this. On the other hand, he’s well aware that you would excel at something like that… “I wouldn’t be surprised…”

Max won the race. After a red flag and on-and-off rain, Max was the winner of the Brazil GP after a 10-race no-win streak. You run to the barrier with Christian, the Red Bull team principal, cheering with the team as Max comes into the garage. Max parks the car in the garage, exhausted by the long and hard race, but elated by the victory. He gets out of the car, helmet in hand, as he walks up to the rest of the Red Bull team, adrenaline still running through his veins. He looks around at everyone, giving them all some high-fives and handshakes as he walks through the garage. But he’s most excited to see you, standing by the side, cheering together with Christian.

Max immediately makes his way towards you and Christian. He gives the team principal a high-five, but his main focus is on you, of course. He looks at you with a tired but joyful smile as he finally comes up to you.

“Hey there…”

"Whoooo! That was one hell of a race!

He wraps his arms around your waist, hugging you tightly, not even caring that he got you all drenched with rain and sweat. “That it was…” He gives you a quick kiss before going to do the post-match interview and then into the cooldown room.

As he stood on the podium, you cheered loudly from the bottom.

"Hey there champ," you say, coming through the door of the trailer a bit later. "We were thinking of dinner? And by we I mean your dad and I.... He has an Alexa?" you say, confused.

Max looks up from his phone, his face brightening almost instantly as he saw you in the doorway. His eyebrows raise in surprise at the mention of his father. Though he supposed it wasn’t really a surprise, the two of them were supposed to go out to dinner together after all.

“An Alexa?” Max asks, a look of bewilderment on his face.

"He asked me if I could set him up an AI house helper, and I was like, 'an Alexa?'"

Max nods and shakes his head, amused, a little chuckle leaving his lips at the thought of his father coming up to you with those kinds of requests.

“You’re gonna have to be careful, he’ll be asking you to install a whole AI security system in his house next…”

"....he does know my corporation is a partial owner of Ring cameras, right?"

“Maybe we should keep that little fun fact secret from him for now…”

You hug him tightly, more intimately as he stands up. He hugs you back, his arms sneaking around your waist to hold you tight against his body.

“Could you do me a favor?”

"What do you need? An Alexa?"

#f1 imagine #max verstappen x reader #f1 x reader #max verstappen

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tatoda · 2 years ago

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Guitar Pick | college!conrad x fem!reader

request

masterlist

part 2

summary: you go to Brown and maybe you don’t exactly fit in, but one brown haired boy makes you feel as if you do

pairing: college!conrad fisher x fem!reader

warnings: just fluff <3

wc: 800 (sorry it's short im getting back into things)

first con fic since last year :) a little rusty on the writing i apologize. sorry it’s not so long :(

It was the smell in the air that brought you comfort. The casual people-watching you would do as you walked down to the music store closest to campus— it wasn’t the best place to shop but it will do for the times you’re in Providence.

The ding of the door sounded as you walked through the store. The red interior with wood floors reminded you of back home, so that is why you kept coming back to the same spot every weekend. No one tried to bother you when shopping. Of course some boys would walk by and you’d glance their way, but they would never glance back at you the same way.

Picking up a guitar from one of the stands you sat down at the small corner couch. You have always loved playing any instrument, you would run around the house singing and hitting any object around the house to make drums until your aunt got you a ukulele at the age of 6 which took your dreams and desires for music to grow. Being at Brown surprised your family. They really thought you would just go to a music school, but you wanted to explore other career paths. Sometimes your parents weren’t proud of it but they supported your decision.

After a few minutes of strumming the instrument, you stood back up to get a new guitar pick. It was time for a new one— well that’s what you told yourself but you just loved shopping for new things. Reaching for a red and green one, another pair of hands reached for the same one.

“sorry.” glancing up at the voice, you see a boy maybe around your age, with brown eyes and brown hair as his cheeks turned a little red at the intersection

“no that’s my fault sorry, go ahead it’s all yours.” you gestured towards the pick.

“no, my mom raised me to be a gentleman. please take it.”

“i-“ but the tall figure cut you off

“please i was looking at another one anyways.” he looked down at you

“thanks, sorry again.” you softly grabbed it as he smiled gently at you before picking up a solid navy blue one

You didn’t think twice before you went to go pay for it and took off out of the store carrying on with your day.

The next day, you sat under a tree strumming your guitar just letting the nice weather hit for once. The shade of the tree helped you relax not being blinded by the sun. You were so busy strumming the instrument you didn’t realize the figure walking towards you.

“guitar pick girl.” the familiar voice called out making you stop in movement, the boy from yesterday. he was walking towards you wearing a Brown sweatshirt and sweatpants

“hi.” you softly introduced not knowing you would be seeing this boy again

“I’m sorry, i know it’s weird for me just to walk up like that and rude for me to not know your name. you left too quickly yesterday i tried to-to get your name but you were gone.” he played with his fingernails as he spoke

“sorry.” you smiled apologetically not knowing why this boy who you totally thought was cute was suddenly approaching you

“no worries,” he rocked on his feet “i-im Conrad, Conrad Fisher” he stuck his hand out to you and you lifted yours off the guitar

“y/n y/l/n” his eyes seemed to immediately remember the future

“how long have you been playing?”

“my whole life basically. you play?” he nods

“yeah just not too long ago maybe like a summer or 2, my mom wanted me to learn a song for her.”

“that’s sweet of you. you must be a mamas boy for the two times you have mentioned her talking to me.” you grinned at him

“yeah.” he sadly smiled and you didn’t feel like pushing him to ask about what it was all about “do you mind if i sit? you look like you need some company.” he gestured to the grass next to you

“all yours.” conrad then sat down next to you criss-cross

“what year are you?” he played with the grass that was in front of him

“junior, what about you?”

“sophomore.” you nodded and you both went silent but it wasn’t a bad silence, it was comfortable

“could i take you out sometime?” your eyes drifted over to conrad and his eyes went wide “sorry! i didn’t mean to come off so strong, i’d just like to get to know you better.” you looked down at his hands as they played with the grass faster and you put a hand over his to stop his movements

“i’d love that.” his eyes went to your hands and his visible relaxed

“i just thought you were really pretty yesterday.” that sentence made you blush and look down biting your lip

“i thought you were pretty cute too, conrad.”

#the summer i turned pretty #tsitp #conrad fisher #prime video #the summer i turned pretty season 2 #college!conrad fisher #belly x conrad #conrad fisher imagine #conrad fisher one shot #conrad fisher smut #conrad fisher x y/n #conrad fisher x reader #conrad fisher x fem!reader

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muwapsturniolo · 11 months ago

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✯Somebody Else✯

Black!reader

Inspired by this reel i saw.

Summary: Chris lays in bed with another while thinking of his ex-lover

warnings: hella angst, brief mentions of sex, swearing, Chris being upset. weed.

✯✯✯✯✯✯✯✯✯✯✯

Chris groans as he spills his seed into the condom, pulling out of the girl beneath him and collapsing next to her. Both of them breathing harshly from the intense sexual encounter.

After a few minutes, the girl sits up and tries to leave the bed, but Chris stops her, "Stay for a bit, we can roll up and chill."

She stares in confusion, not use to guys asking her to stay after sex. They are usually the first to throw her clothes in her lap and tell her to hurry up and leave.

It's a nice change of pace.

She nods and grabs her shirt, slipping it on along with her underwear. She settles back into the bed, sitting crisscross on the black sheets. Chris sits up, reaching into his nightstand to grab the items needed to roll a blunt.

As he starts grinding the weed, the girl speaks.

"Who's Dessi?"

Chris stops what he's doing, his heart clenching at the name.

"What?"

"Who's Des-No I heard you. Why are you bringing her up? How do you know her?" His tone holds a bit of malice, clearly frustrated with the name.

"You literally called me her name."

He pushes the paraphernalia to the side and rubs his hands over his face in exhaustion. "I'm sorry, I didn't mean to do that. that was probably awkward to hear." He apologizes.

He didn't even know he did it and it has him thinking, has he done this to other women who have laid in his bed? The thought alone makes him want to throw up.

"Wanna talk about her?" The girl offers. Chris slowly turns to her, "Huh?" She rolls her eyes and grabs the grinder from his lap.

"Talk about it. it's clear you still have love for her. Maybe if you talk about her you won't call another girl by her name." She jokes softly.

He goes back and forth with idea. He could talk about her and risk crying like a little bitch in front of his one-night stand, or he could keep his emotions bottled up like he always does.

"Roll up first, I'll play some music."

The girl nods and proceeds to roll two blunts, figuring they will be here for a while. As she lights the first blunt, the sound of Lil Uzi's The Way Live Goes fills the blue-illuminated room. Chris settles back down, a pair of grey sweatpants adorning his hips.

They sit in silence until Chris finally speaks.

"She was someone I loved...I loved her and she screwed me up big time." The girl hands him the blunt, figuring he needs the drug to continue. He takes a hit, ghosting it before blowing it right back out.

"We met a couple months ago and I fell hard. She was beautiful, a little shorter than me, with beautiful brown skin. She always wore wigs but I loved when she wore her natural hair, even though she said it was too much to keep up with."

The girl mumbles something along the lines of, "She ain't lying."

Chris continues, staring straight ahead, "I met her at a party and we left to get food. She laughed at all my jokes, was super sarcastic and just had an amazing vibe. After that night I felt like I met...My person."

He hands her back the blunt, now fiddling with his phone. "I started taking her out on dates, which was new for me because I'm not good in relationships, but I wanted to be for her. I did everything I thought she would like. I got her the flowers she loved, I would buy the little trinkets that reminded me of her, for fuck sake I even wrote love letters."

"Love letters? That's really cute." She mumbles, a small smile on her face as she relights the blunt. "I thought so but she didn't. This went on for two months... She would tell me all the time that she loved what we had but she didn't want to put a label on it yet." He chuckles as her voice fills his ears.

"let's not label things yet, you're having fun, right? That's all that matters."

He shakes his head, plucking the blunt from the girl's fingers. "My brothers and a few friends would ask me what we were and I couldn't give them an answer. When I explained to my older brother Justin, he gave me this look of sadness, like he knew what she was doing all along. He told me, but I didn't listen. I loved her." The girl nods, choosing to listen instead of speaking.

"Two months ago I started getting fed up with it. I wanted to make her mine. I'm bad at talking about my feelings verbally so I wrote her another love letter. I poured my heart out, telling her how I felt from the first moment I laid eyes on her, to the point where I realized I was in love with her."

She watches as his eyes get glossy. Of course he's high at this point, but this is a different type of glossy, a glossy only made by the salty tears your body produces.

"And you know what she did?" He laughs softly, the vocal expression filled with sadness.

"She called me and told me to stop. She told me she wasn't in love with me, that she wasn't in the right mental state to be in a relationship." He wipes the tears streaming down his face, cursing internally for getting so worked up.

"I was hurt, but who was I to be mad because she wasn't in the right mental state? So I told her I got it, and that she can hit me up whenever she felt better, or comfortable being around me again."

The humming of the 1975 begins to fill the room, the girl identifying the song as "somebody else."

She watches as his breathing gets harsher, a clear indication that he's going to break down any moment now.

"She hit me up a week later...I didn't even get a 'Hey how are you' text. instead, I got a fucking video of her getting her back blown out by some douche bag and her moaning how she loves him."

I don't want your body But I hate to think about you with somebody else

He breaks down, his sobs bouncing off the wall as he puts his head in his hands. The girl quickly ashes out the blunt and wraps her arms around him, holding him close. His whole body shakes in dejection, the tears streaming endlessly.

"A-an hour later she t-texted me and t-told me to f-forget about h-her because sh-es in a relationship."

Our love has gone cold You're intertwining your soul with somebody else

The girl rubs his back in a caring manner. She's only known Chris for about three hours now, and she already hated seeing him like this. She can tell this Dessi girl has truly fucked with his mental, screwing up any interpretation he has of love.

"Shh, it's ok. Everything is ok."

"I-I just don't understand! I did everything right and sh-she just threw me to the side like g-garbage! H-how can you tell me y-you aren't ready for a r-relationship then g-get in one?!"

Her heart aches for the boy. She may not know him that well, but if she ever met Dessi on the street she would dogwalk her for him.

She continues to comfort Chris, rubbing his back and mumbling praises in attempt to calm him down.

After 30 minutes, he stops sobbing and switches to sniffling. "Sorry for that... Must have been a huge turn-off to see a guy crying like that." He sits up and wipes his eyes, reaching for the other blunt. She stops him, slowly pushing his hand down,

"Wasn't a turn-off, if anything I found it attractive...I like guys who can be vulnerable."

And c'mon baby (I know) This ain't the last time that I'll see your face

The two stare at each other, the once blue LEDS now a soft pink, illuminating their faces and bodies in the warm lighting.

Maybe it's the weed, but the longer he stares at her, the more she begins to look like Dessi.

I'm reminded that I should be gettin' over it

He shakes his head. She doesn't look like Dessi, she looks like her own person.

I don't want your body, I don't want your body

Her own beautiful person.

He crashes his lips against hers, pushing her back against the soft pillows.

"I'm done talking about her, I want to focus on you Y/N"

✯✯✯✯✯✯✯✯✯✯✯

I LOVE THIS SM!!! SM ANGST! DO YALL LIKE HOW Y/N WASNT SAID UNTIL THE END?! IDK WHY BUT THAT WAS MY FAVORITE PART!!! ALSO IT'S FUCK THAT BITCH DESSI!!!

TAGLIST🍑

@bernardsgf @bernardsleftbootycheek @blahbel668 @mattfrfr @gdsvhtwa @sturniolo-aali @lily-loves-struniolos @kynda-avery @causeidontlikeagoldrush

@st7rnioioss @carolinalikesthings @mattslolita @suyqa @xxloveralways14 @pepsiimaxx @judespoision

@ivonchetooo1239 @imaslut4kehlani @that-general-simp @m4stermindd @itzdarling @gigisworldsstuff @adoreindie @braindead4l @pettydollie @chrissgirlsstuff @alexis007 @ratatioulle @yamamasjumpercables @luv4kozume @sturnioloslurps @kqyslyho3 @mattslolita

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starkwlkr · 2 years ago

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Hiiii! So I do not know if you are making requests but if you are doing can do: Charles x Reader where she is a medical student and will do an internship in formula one, Charles does not like her much until he gets hurt and have to take care of her which makes the two approach

kiss with a fist | charles leclerc

warnings: needles and blood mentions and charles being an asshole <3

Y/n was nervous. She was starting her new internship with none other than F1. She watched a couple of races, but she wasn’t a die hard fan. But she wasn’t here to watch men drive in circles, she was here to work.

When she first arrived to the paddock, she was already making enemies. She didn’t mean to, but a certain Ferrari driver had woken up on the wrong side of the bed that morning. Y/n bumped into Charles, nearly dropping his hot coffee on himself.

“I’m sorry! The photographer was backing up and I-”

“Do you not watch where you’re going? There’s all this space around you.” Charles groaned as he dropped his coffee into a trash can. “What? You want an autograph?”

Y/n rolled her eyes. “Not everyone wants your autograph. And I said I was sorry. By the way, I’m more of a Red Bull fan.” She really didn’t know anything about Red Bull to be honest. You could have someone explain every single detail of f1 and she still wouldn’t understand. All she knew was that Red Bull probably had more haters than supporters.

She quickly left Charles and walked to her boss’ office where she was supposed to meet him. Y/n was already wishing the day was over so she could go back home and bury herself in her blankets after her interaction with Charles, but she had a long day ahead of her.

“Charles Leclerc crashes into the barrier!”

Y/n watched from a monitor as Charles’ Ferrari crashed. The replay kept on going, sort of a reminder to the Ferrari fans that this season wasn’t going their way. Charles stumbled out of his car, almost tripping over his feet.

“He’s okay, right?” Y/n asked her boss. Sure, he was an asshole to her that morning, but she would never wish for someone to get injured.

“Yeah, I got confirmation that Leclerc is fine. Have you met him yet?”

“Sort of. Had to leave before I could even get an autograph.” She said sarcastically, but her boss didn’t pick it up.

“I’m sure you’ll get one.”

Yeah, no.

After the race, Y/n was going through the piles of paperwork she was told to do. She was writing down on her clipboard when she heard a knock on the door. She figured it was her boss or someone else other than Charles Leclerc.

“Yes?” She looked up to see the driver. “Oh. Finally brought me an autograph?” She went back to writing in her clipboard.

“No, someone made me realize that not everyone wants my autograph. I was just wondering if you have time to check if I’m dying.” He said casually.

Y/n dropped her pen and looked at him, wondering if he was serious or not. “Check if you’re dying?”

“Yeah, I crashed today. My head is hurting, I think I might pass out. I’m not dying, right?” Charles explained.

“Fine, I’ll check. Sit down.” Y/n pointed to the examination table next to the desk she was currently using. Charles followed her instructions and sat on the examination table.

“Are you going to give me a shot? Because I hate needles. And sometimes I get weirded out if I see my own blood.” Charles admitted.

“Why would I give you a shot when your head is hurting? I can if you want me to.” Y/n said, standing In front of Charles.

“Nope, I am good.”

“Great. So just let me check if you’re dying real quick.”

Before Y/n could even do anything, Charles spoke up. “My head actually doesnt hurt at all. I lied, I wanted to come here to apologize for this morning.”

“Did your mom find out and made you come apologize?”

“No, my mother doesn’t know but if she did she would pull my ear and tell me to treat women with respect. And I do treat women with respect, but I’ve been having a bad…” Charles sighed and looked down.

“Day?” Y/n guessed.

“Season actually. Point is, I shouldn’t have been mean to you and I’m sorry and i understand if you don’t accept my apology. If I were you, I wouldn’t.” Charles nodded and got off the examination table. Before he could leave, Y/n called his name making him turn around to face her.

“You forgot your lollipop. I have this thing where I give my patients a lollipop no matter what age they are so here,” Y/n handed Charles a red lollipop. “You’re still an asshole, just the sweet kind.”

“Was that intentional? The sweet comment then you giving me a lollipop?” He chuckled as he took the candy.

“Just take the damn lollipop, Leclerc, or I will give you a shot.”

#formula 1 #formula 1 imagine #f1 x reader #f1 imagine #f1 x you #charles leclerc #charles leclerc x reader #charles leclerc one shot #cl16 x reader #ferrari #f1 fic #f1 one shot #charles leclerc imagine

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glitterjay · 1 year ago

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ー picnic date

minors dni

jake x fem!reader

warnings public sex, pet names, fingering (reader receiving)

for @magyuhye <3

you were in your room, looking at your self in the full sized mirror in front of you. your boyfriend jaeyun had proposed a picnic date, and asked you to wear the prettiest dress you could find in your closet. you stood there admiring the flower pattern that went perfectly with the nice weather, and how it revealed just enough skin.

without thinking too much, you got yourself a nice water bottle downstairs, and waited for your boyfriend to arrive. soon enough, you heard keys jingling right outside your door. you boyfriend revealed himself as soon as the door opened, showing you that peculiar smile that accompanied him all the time. “you ready?”

on the way to the park, jake kept repeating just how amazing you looked, and how you were all his. the compliments never failed to make you feel extremely pretty, and also make your heat throb. your hand rested in the gear stick with his hand right on top. you loved that no matter what, jaeyun always kept contact.

you guys arrived at the beautiful park and settled down. the colors of the wonderful green grass and the tall trees went perfectly with the colors of your dress. jake sat himself right next to you, hand on your thighs at all times. you both giggled at random things, and admired the view before you.

as you watched some kids the birds eating a few feet away from where you were sitting, you felt something move under your dress. you looked down and realized your boyfriend’s hand was moving dangerously close to your heat, which was not a good sign considering you missed him. a lot.

“whats wrong, love?” jake asked, knowing exactly what he was doing. you simply shook your head, afraid your voice would betray you and crack if you spoke. he smiled at your actions, moving his hand in a blunt movement, making contact with your core. you couldn’t help but squirm a little, putting a hand over your mouth to stop any noise from being too loud.

this gave jaeyun the queue to slide your underwear to the side, caressing your folds with his finger. he covered your legs with another blanket he had brought in advance, this being his plan all along. “your legs must be cold, am i right? the breeze is a little chilly today” he pushed just the tip of his slender finger into you, teasing. he leaned in, nibbling your earlobe before speaking again “you look so pretty when you’re embarrassed”

you could feel your face turn even redder than it already was. you held onto his shoulder, hiding your face there. “j-jaeyun, don’t do this to me”. he giggled at your words, carefully inserting his full digit slowly into you. this made you bite his shoulder in response, scared of being way too loud and getting caught. “careful there, darling.”

he continued moving his finger, picking up the pace with every thrust. your entire world felt dizzy. you didnt know if the birds in your field of vision were real or part of your imagination. jake cooed at your fucked out expression. he decided to be a little bold, and with a smooth movement, he was hovering over you. with this new position, he was more free, and so, he added another finger.

you bit your lip, reminding yourself that you’re still in a public place. to some people, it might’ve looked like you both were playing. little did they know you were about to come undone right there and then.

“can- can’t hold it anymore”

your boyfriend smiled big, knowing damn well he was the one doing all of that. he wanted to take the blanket off of you, he wanted you to cry and scream his name at the fop of your lungs, he wanted everyone to know HE was the cause of such pleasure, but he held himself.

“go ahead, love. cum for me”

the pet name was enough to throw you over the edge, hand flying to your mouth to muffle your moans and cries. body left shaking at the adrenaline, embarrassment, and pleasure you felt at the same time. he left a kiss on your forehead, sitting straight on your side again, leaving you laying on your back. “fuck baby, we might have to go home soon and deal with this other problem.”

hello! one of two things here. first of all, i know today is october 2nd. i missed the first day, so i will be posting twice today. second, i suck at writing long scenarios so i apologize for that. if yall do like it tho, feel free to request more scenarios for other enha members (besides ni-ki and sunoo) in my ask! help this poor soul, i won’t be able to come up with things all on my own for the whole month

#— ✿ c's work!#kpop #kpop smut #enhypen #enhypen smut #jake #enhypen jake #sim jaeyun #sim jake #jake smut #jaeyun smut

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mischievouslittlecreature · 20 days ago

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Part 26: Do You Love Me

Summary: Tommy decides what to do about Mosley, and Lizzie comes home.

Word Count: 6,249

Warnings: Insecurity, a very unhappy marriage, and references to polyamory.

Previous Chapter • Series • Fic • Next Chapter

Chapter 5: The Thread is Ripping

“Which one is Mosley?”

Lucy and Ada were sitting in the observation booth, overlooking the MP’s benches. Craning her head to peer down at the men, Lucy gestured with her cigarette towards where Mosley sat, his head cocked as he listened to Tommy speak.

“That one.”

Ada leaned forward, arms resting on the banister, eyes fixing on Mosley with a keen level of scrutiny in them that reminded Lucy and awful lot of how Tommy looked at someone when he was first sizing them up.

Bringing her cigarette back to her lips, Lucy turned her attention back to Tommy, allowing herself a moment to just enjoy watching him speak.

“I’m really not sure about going ahead with this meeting, Lucy,” Ada told her as they went to meet Tommy out in the hall after the speakers were done.

“I know. But Tommy wants to hear what he has to say.”

“As if a man like that could have anything good to say.”

“All the more reason to hear it, then.”

“You can’t possibly be alright with Tommy considering working with him.”

“It’s just drinks, Ada. And he’s not considering anything with Mosley yet.”

Ada’s voice lowered, eyes shifting around to make sure no one was listening. “So what is he doing, then? Because I know my brother, and as bloody infuriating as he can be sometimes, I don’t believe that he actually agrees with any of Mosley’s more recent policies.”

A group of men dressed in fine, pressed suits walked past them. Lucy eyes them warily, waiting until they had passed before speaking.

“Burying our heads in the sand when it comes to Mosley and the growing movement behind him isn’t going to help anyone. Better to get to know if he and this new party he’s supposedly forming are an actual threat or not.”

“So you can deal with it now?”

Lucy wetted her lips. “Better to kill it while it’s young than when it’s grown formidable and strong.”

She could feel Ada still watching her while she broke their gaze to look around for Tommy.

“Why did he even ask me here?”

Lucy looked back at her, weighed in her mind if it was worth telling her or not, and decided that it was. “Because Mosley scares him.”

Shocked silence met her at that. There was a shift in Ada, as she finally started to understand what they were dealing with. “Does he scare you?”

“Yes.” She finally heard Tommy’s telltale heavy footfalls coming up behind them, turning to find him approaching hastily.

“Sorry, got cornered by a few people. Had to make small talk. Shall we?” He gestured down the hall.

“Tommy, you made me your political advisor,” Ada said as they walked. “And as your political advisor, it is my official advice that you don’t meet with Mr. Mosley.”

“Yes, I know.”

They made their way into a dimly lit, crowded lounge, embellished by leather seats and chairs, each circular table adorned with a small red-shaded lamp. MPs and other political figures were gathered at tables or milling about, the lounge with its bar a common place for them to gather to discuss business or other dealings.

Mosley was already seated at a table when they arrived, a newspaper held up to his face. He lowered it at the sound of their approaching footsteps, face breaking into a beaming smile that did nothing to hide the deadness of his eyes as he stood to greet them and shake Tommy’s hand.

“And Miss. Winters, of course, wonderful to see you again.”

She forced herself to shake his hand, skin crawling the entire time that their palms made contact. His leering gaze was respitefully pulled quickly away from her as his attention shifted towards Ada as Tommy introduced them.

She tried to hide how she inched a little closer to Tommy before they sat down.

From an outside perspective, it may have looked like the meeting went smoothly. But as Mosley continued to speak, Lucy felt her sense of unnerving grow.

“You know, I was rather hoping we might have this meeting alone,” Mosley said, eyes never leaving Tommy’s.

“Lucy accompanies me to most of my meetings, Mr. Mosley, and my sister is my political advisor,” Tommy explained.

Ada spoke up, explaining that she had advised Tommy not to meet with him, and Mosley’s attention turned directly onto her. Lucy was impressed at the way Ada met his dark, empty gaze without so much as blinking. When he brought his hand down with a crash onto the table, shouting in demand that the whiskey they’d ordered only a few short minutes ago be brought out now, his gaze remained fixed pointedly on Ada. A clear telegraphing of his disapproval of her presence. An attempt at intimidation. At frightening her.

If Ada was at all frightened by the display, she did a marvelous job hiding it. The corner of her lips turned up on one side, and she shot Lucy a look of mild amusement at the childish behavior from across the table.

Can you believe that shit, Luce? her eyes seemed to say. Lucy managed a smirk back at her, reaching into her pocket for her cigarettes. Mosley’s gaze was turned back fully onto Tommy, but not for one second did Lucy think that he hadn’t taken note of the quiet exchange between her and Ada.

Good. Better for him to know that they thought him ridiculous rather than that they were scared of him.

He dodged making any direct confirmations that facism was where he was moving towards politically. Instead, he gracefully turned the conversation towards, of all things, Ireland.

Lucy took a considerable gulp from her whiskey, eyes darting towards Tommy. His face remained schooled into an expression that gave away nothing, but she could tell that he was thinking of the same thing that she was:

That voice, on the other end of the telephone line. An Irish accent, explaining how there were men in Belfast who wanted him dead. Men who Michael had been allegedly cutting deals with.

Landmines, in their own fucking garden. But who was the gardener? Who planted them? It couldn’t be Michael, he had still been on a ship or in Belfast when they were placed. So who was it, then? The men from Belfast, or someone else?

And what the fuck did Mosley know about it, if anything? Was it just a coincidence, that he brought up Ireland now, of all times? Or was it an indication of something else?

Enemies. Enemies in every fucking direction that they turned. Her skin prickled with that feeling of approaching, looming danger. Drawing nearer and nearer with every breath.

She couldn’t say that she wasn’t relieved when Ada promptly stood, announcing that she was ready to leave.

Mosley ignored her. “We’re looking for someone to begin a dialogue with certain elements in Belfast with whom we don’t officially have any dealings.”

Lucy raised an eyebrow. She couldn’t help but find it a little funny how confident Mosley was that Tommy would be in any way supportive of his ideologies. And yet here he was, inviting him into his organization without seemingly even the slightest worry that Tommy would be opposed.

It was often that she forgot that other people did not know Tommy like she did.

Mosley did not seem dissuaded by Tommy’s gentle refusal of the offer. “It would involve a promotion.”

“Birmingham is my concern,” Tommy rose from his seat. Lucy mirrored him. “Ireland bores me.”

She and Ada couldn’t help but share a tiny smile at that. Tommy thanked Mosley for the whiskey, and led the way towards the exit. When she looked back while trailing behind him, it was to see Mosley watching them leave, a smirk pulling at one side of his lips. She turned her head sharply to face forward once more.

“What the fuck was that about?” Ada asked once they were in an almost deserted hallway, a good distance away from Mosley and the lounge.

“Ireland. It’s been Ireland’s day all fucking day long,” was all Tommy said in response, sidestepping her attempts to garner any more information on that subject. Instead, he started instructing her to go home and call her contacts from her time in Boston to ask about Michael. They drew aside, Tommy pacing back and forth, sounding off orders. Lucy watched him worriedly, sensing that something inside him was moments away from unraveling.

“What are you talking about?” Ada asked, as he continued to ramble on about Mosley.

“I’m talking about an empty chair, Ada,” Tommy’s voice was barely above a whisper. “My chair. My throne. People think that I’m gonna fall. They start behaving in a different way around you.”

“Who thinks that?” Ada had gone still.

“They start to circle,” Tommy continued, as if he hadn’t even heard her. She shared an alarmed look with Lucy. “Who’s gonna take the throne, eh?”

“Tommy…” Lucy tried, reaching out a hand to him, hoping to pull him back from whatever dark precipice he was teetering on.

“Linda, she wants some for Arthur…Aberama Gold…people in the north…Michael…” He seemed to only just then realize that words which he had not intended to speak had been pouring from his lips. His jaw hinged shut and he spun away, his back to her and Ada, clearing his throat while raising his cigarette to his lips. When he turned back to them, his expression was collected once more, the mask that had momentarily slipped once again firmly in place. He reissued his order for Ada to go home and make some calls. “I need to get back to Birmingham. Lucy.”

“Yeah.” She made to follow him, as he was already moving with quick steps down the hall.

“Lucy–” Ada grabbed at her arm, alarm clear in her voice. Lucy turned half back towards her, taking in the worried look in her wide eyes and reached out to squeeze her arm.

“I’ve got him. Don’t worry.”

Ada’s lips pressed together, and while the concern still shimmered in her eyes, her shoulders relaxed a little. With a nod, she let Lucy go.

She had to jog a little to catch up with Tommy, his steps more hurried than usual. Stupid short legs, she mentally cursed, shooting them a glower before quickening her pace.

“Tommy…” she tried to get his attention, but he didn’t acknowledge her, and she decided not to try again until after they were out of the office and in the car, pulling out onto the street to start the trek back to Birmingham.

“No one is taking anything,” she said finally, definitively. “I won’t let them.” When he didn’t respond, she looked over at him. Distress and paranoia was still etched onto his face, his eyes shifting around as if searching for unseen enemies. “Tommy?”

“They’re all coming at us, Lucy.”

“Michael is a problem,” she acknowledged. “And so are the people up north. But I think Linda really just wants to get away. She’d sooner take Arthur back into the country than try to have him take your position. And you know that Arthur would never agree to usurping you. Aberama’s loyalty is guaranteed so long as we continue to support Bonnie’s boxing career.” She reached out to smooth a hand over the back of his head. “We’re alright. It’s mostly Michael and Mosley that we need to worry about now.” She watched his throat work as he swallowed, and she dropped her hand to instead rest on his forearm. “And, if any of the others do try to betray us, I’ll just kill them.”

He let out a small snort, looking over at her fondly. She was turned almost entirely with her side pressed against the leather seats of the car, body jostling slightly as they bounced along the uneven cobblestones. She cupped his cheek momentarily, a reassuring smile tugging at her lips. Some of the frantic paranoia had gone out in his eyes, and she relaxed at the knowledge that she’d managed to calm him down at least somewhat. He leaned into her touch, quickly turning his head to press a kiss to the center of her palm before returning his eyes back to the road.

“What would I do without you, eh?” he asked. She pressed herself to his side, the physical contact doing wonders to calm both of them. And there in the safety of the shell of the car, she didn’t need to worry about anyone spotting them. Her head came to nestle against his shoulder, the material of his coat soft against her cheek.

“Tell me what you’re thinking in regards to Mosley,” she requested. Tommy sighed, eyes remaining on the road while she rubbed a hand up and down his chest.

“I don’t think he’s going to stop trying to get me to join his new party.”

“You’re not a fascist.”

“Some in the family would say otherwise.”

“Then they’d be wrong.”

Tommy gave her a little peck on the side of the head for that. “I think he may be one of the worst people I’ve ever met.”

“Yeah,” she agreed. “And we’ve known some bad ones over the years.”

Keeping one hand on the wheel, he trailed the other through her hair. Being careful, as he always was, not to pull on any of the strands. “I have an idea. But it’s dangerous. And I’ll need to talk to Younger…”

She gave him a knowing look. “You want to do to Mosley and the fascists what you’ve been doing to Jessie and the communists.”

“Yes.”

“You think that you can stomach pretending to be one of them?”

“If it means stopping him.”

She nodded. Mosley was a monster creeping in the dark, waiting for an opportunity to pounce. Someone had to stop him. Might as well be them. They were probably some of the best equipped for the job, anyway.

“You would be alright with it?” Tommy asked, and she smiled a little to herself at how he always sought out her opinion on things.

“I’m happy with anything that wipes that smug look off his face.” Closing her eyes, she tilted her head to press a kiss to his neck. “You have my support. Always.”

“Thanks, love.” His hand dropped from stroking through her hair to wrap around her shoulders. “Have you managed to dig up anything on this Captain Swing yet?”

“Not much. Her real name is Laura McKee. She really is a commander in the IRA. That’s all our friends in Belfast have been able to find out, so far. I told them to keep digging.”

“Right.”

They rode in silence for a stretch of time.

“Are Lizzie and Ruby still coming home today?” she asked.

“Far as I know.”

“Maybe…she’ll be better now that she’s had some time away and gotten things out of her system.”

“Yeah. Maybe.” He sounded about as optimistic as someone who had just been diagnosed with a terminal illness. Lucy gave him a gentle pat in sympathy. His thumb rubbed back and forth against her upper arm where it was clasped. “Thank you for helping me with everything.”

“Of course. It’s what I’m here for.”

He pressed a kiss to her hair, and together they both turned their eyes to the dark road sprawling out in front of them.

∗ ∗ ∗

When they arrived home, Tommy took all but three steps into the house, and was promptly collided into by Ruby when she came dashing into the entryway to throw herself into his arms.

“Daddy!”

“Hello, my girl,” he hoisted her up so that her weight rested against one of his hips. Just the feel of her in his arms was enough to have the ache of missing her lessening. “How are you, eh? Did you have a good time at Uncle Arthur’s?”

She nodded, long dark hair swinging with her movements. “I baked brownies with Auntie Linda.”

“You did?”

“Hey kiddo,” Lucy stretched up on her toes to place a kiss to Ruby’s cheek after handing her coat off to Frances.

“Hi, Lucy!” Ruby beamed at her, and Tommy felt his heart swell. There was a time, he knew, that Lucy had been afraid that Ruby would hate her, given her complicated relationship with her mother. He couldn’t have been more grateful that wasn’t the case. He was pretty sure his sweet girl was incapable of hating anyone.

Amazing; how something containing such kindness and purity could ever have come from him.

The click of heels on the floor was his only warning to another figure approaching before Lizzie rounded the corner. Her head was held high, dress swishing around her ankles, hair styled meticulously in dark waves around her face. She did not smile when she saw him.

Quiet stretched on between them all. Finally, he forced himself to awkwardly clear his throat.

“Lizzie.”

“Tommy.” She said his name as if speaking the word was like swiping a razor along the inside of her throat.

Swallowing, he set Ruby down on the floor, bending so that he was at her level. “Ruby, why don’t you take Lucy to the kitchens and show her what Aunt Linda taught you, eh?”

“Yeah! Okay!” She tottered two steps forward to latch eagerly onto Lucy’s hand and begin pulling her along. Lucy shot him a puzzled look, eyes darting between him and Lizzie. Clearly wondering what he intended on saying in her absence.

Don’t worry, he pushed the thought to her gently. Something clicked behind Lucy’s eyes as she realized what this was all about. She raised an eyebrow, giving him a look.

Don’t be too hard on her.

I won’t. Promise.

She looked only half convinced, but let Ruby tug her away without complaint. Tommy waited until he could no longer hear the clatter of Ruby’s shoes on the floorboards before speaking.

“Where’s Charlie?”

“In the library, finishing up his homework.” Lizzie took a step towards him. “Tommy, listen–”

“He overheard.”

She froze. “What?”

“He overheard what you said about Lucy to Polly and Linda. And then he got mad, and repeated it to her.”

Her lips parted, eyes widening. A look of mild horror settled on her features, and the sight of it brought Tommy an odd sense of relief. That was confirmation that she hadn’t been purposefully whispering poison into his children’s ears, then.

“Oh…” Lizzie said, throat flexing as she swallowed. “What did he say?”

“He said that she’s just my whore. That everybody hates her.” The words tasted metallic as he released them, just hearing them again making him momentarily furious with her. But he breathed in deep through his nose and forced himself to remain calm.

Lizzie looked away, down at the floor. “Shit. I’m sorry, Tommy. He was never meant to hear that.” She shifted from foot to foot, not really meeting his eyes. “At least it wasn’t that bad…”

“Not that bad!? He made Lucy cry!”

Lizzie said nothing to that, still staring down at her shoes. Tommy shook his head, fishing into his pocket for his cigarettes.

Wait.

He’d just swiped one across his lips when her words clicked, his face snapping up to bore his eyes into her.

“Fucking hell, what else have you said about her for that to be considered not bad!?”

Lizzie still wouldn’t meet his gaze. “Are things between her and Charlie…?” she trailed off, pointedly not answering his question.

Tommy studied her a moment more, lighter clicking to raise the flame to his cigarette before answering. “They’re fine. I managed to smooth things over. He was just having a tantrum; he didn’t really mean any of it. And he’s apologized.”

“Good.” The plain relief on Lizzie’s face had him considering her. For all her faults, she had always been understanding and respectful of just how much his children meant to Lucy.

“You should never have said those things about her.” He took a long drag of his cigarette. “You need to apologize too.”

Her lips pressed together. “I’m sorry that he overheard that, Tommy, really. But…”

“But what?”

“But I’m not sorry for what I said.”

His fingers tightened around his cigarette. “Why not?”

Her jaw clenched, chin raising. “Because it’s the truth, that’s why. Everybody despises her, Tommy. You don’t hear how they talk about her when they know you’re not listening. She’s nothing but your whore. Your mistress–”

“Don’t you dare talk about her like that–”

“I will talk about her anyway that I fucking please. I’ll do it out of the children’s earshot, but I won’t swallow my opinions just because it might hurt her feelings.”

“She hasn’t even done anything to you!”

“She’s fucking my husband!” Lizzie burst out. “She’s fucking my husband when she knows I’m not alright with it. You may have decided that she can do no wrong, but that doesn’t change the fact that she has chosen, over and over, for years, to hurt me by staying with you. I think that I ought to be allowed to be upset about that, and to say whatever I like about it when in the company of my friends and family.”

“Lizzie–”

“I have let you two carry on as you have! I’ve let you do that, Tommy! Even though it kills me. I have…tried to be at least cordial with her. I know that I don’t always succeed, and I am sorry for that. And I am sorry that Charlie overheard. I’d never intend to turn the kids against her. But I have feelings, Tommy! I have to get them out somewhere. Better with Polly and Linda, rather than to her face.”

“Doesn’t seem to fucking work though, does it? All the hateful things that you say always get back to her eventually.”

“You know what? Fuck you, Tommy.” He saw some of the ice-cold contempt that had been blazing in her eyes when she left for Arthur’s days ago ignite once more. “I don’t want to hear it,” she started for the door to one of the sitting rooms.

“Oi! We aren’t fucking finished here,” he moved to follow her, and she rounded on him.

“What more do you want!? I said I’ll fucking apologize! Now leave me the fuck alone! It’s the least you could do.”

“Why the hell did you come back then if you didn’t want to be around us, eh!?”

“Because your daughter kept asking for you,” she sneered furiously. “And I knew that sooner or later, you’d drag us back here anyway to have her close.” She took a step nearer to him. In her heels, she was taller than him, if only by an inch or two. “I didn’t come back because I’m no longer upset. Or because I forgive either of you. I don’t. I never will.”

“Forgive us for what, Lizzie!? For sticking to the agreement that the three of us made which you then decided to change your mind about?”

Her throat convulsed, and for just a moment, her eyes seemed to glimmer tearily. “We could have had an actual chance at being happy,” her voice suddenly dropped to a desolate whisper. “If she wasn’t here.”

He wanted to shake her. How could she not understand? He couldn’t be happy without Lucy.

“If you really believe that, then you don’t know me at all.”

Her bottom lip trembled, cracks beginning to form in the hatred molding to her face, giving way to heartbreak.

Before he could say anything more, she whirled on her heel and stormed out the door.

∗ ∗ ∗

Lizzie found Lucy sitting alone, head propped up on one hand while she considered the chess board before her. She was playing herself, Lizzie could see. Moving both the black and white pieces around the board. Trouble was curled in her lap, asleep.

She hadn’t really spoken to Lucy since she and Tommy had arrived home. The kids had monopolized their attention for most of the evening; Ruby in particular was eager to play with Lucy and her father after going so long without seeing them. Lizzie had been fine with leaving them to it. In all honesty, she could use the break after having to manage Ruby mostly on her own. And after their conversation about what Charlie said to Lucy, she would rather have not been in the same room as Tommy anyway.

He’d retreated into his office to take care of some business after they’d put the kids to bed, leaving her and Lucy to their own devices.

Taking a tentative step forward, she forced herself to open her mouth.

“Lucy?”

The redhead looked up, and Lizzie could see the wariness that immediately entered her face upon catching sight of her. It was a look that she saw crossing Lucy’s face more and more whenever they interacted.

Lizzie supposed she couldn’t entirely blame her for that.

She gestured to the chess board. “Do you…want someone to play with?”

Lucy blinked, that wariness still not quite leaving her face. “Sure.” She started to move the pieces back into their starting positions on the board while Lizzie took the seat across from her, examining the little carved pieces of black and white wood. Lucy had whittled and painted each one herself, along with the board.

Once all the pieces were set up, she took hold of one of the white pawns on her side of the board, sliding it forward.

“I’m sorry,” she finally forced herself to say the words when they were about halfway through the game. Most of her white pieces had been swept from the board by Lucy’s black ones. Not surprising. She had never taken to chess all that well. Usually, Lucy went easy on her.

She felt Lucy’s large brown eyes jerk upwards to stare into her face.

“For what Charlie said. I didn’t…he wasn’t supposed to overhear that.”

Lucy looked back down at the board. She had one arm crossed over her chest, hand folded against the opposite bicep. Like she was holding an imaginary shield between them. “I figured.”

Lizzie nodded. At least Lucy’s opinion of her hadn’t sunk that low, then. “Still, I’m sorry.”

“It’s fine,” Lucy kept her eyes focused on the pieces, moving her queen to take one of Lizzie’s bishops. “It worked itself all out. I’m sorry that Tommy got on your case about it.”

“He’s just protecting you.” She hated herself for being unable to wholly mask the bitterness that underlaid her words. A guilty look crossed Lucy’s face, her head dipping slightly and her shoulders drawing in as if bracing for a slap. On her next move, she pulled one of her bishops back, leaving her rook open for Lizzie to take with one of her knights.

She wondered if Lucy had let her take the piece on purpose.

“How were things at Arthur’s?” Lucy asked, clearly eager to change the subject. Lizzie hesitated. There were a lot of things that Linda had told her in confidence that she was not eager to share. Everyone knew that anything that was told to Lucy would make its way back to Tommy.

“Things aren’t good between him and Linda,” she finally settled on saying.

“What’s she upset about now?”

Lizzie worried at her bottom lip. “Everything, really. Truth be told, going there wasn’t much of an improvement from being here.” She should have gone to Polly or Ada’s instead. But she had been afraid that both of them would try to talk her out of any ruminations she had about divorce. Linda, at the very least, had understood her feelings on that front. “Only difference was that I wasn’t the one doing the arguing.”

“Mm.” Lucy made a sound of sympathy, taking one of Lizzie’s knights with her remaining rook. “I am glad that you’re home.”

“You don’t have to lie.”

Lucy cocked her head. “I’m not. Look…I didn’t miss any of the fighting, but…the house feels empty without you and Ruby in it.”

“We may not be here for very long.”

That wariness that had mostly melted away from Lucy’s face while they played returned. “What do you mean?”

Lizzie plucked up the little white envelope that she had set down in her lap while they played. She turned it over twice in her hands, examining her own looping handwriting of Tommy’s name scrawled in black ink on the back of it. Holding it between two fingers, like she would a cigarette, she held it out to Lucy.

“Will you give him this for me?”

Lucy eyed the envelope as if Lizzie had just held out a hand grenade to her. She supposed in a way, that she had. She took it with her pale, lightly freckled fingers, handling the envelope gingerly while she examined it.

“What…?”

“Linda and I talked a lot. We thought that writing down everything that we need to say would be better than actually trying to say it. She’s written one to Arthur. Well…technically I think that she’s written two. She hadn’t decided which one to give to him yet when I left.”

Lucy turned the envelope over in her hands, brows furrowed. “Lizzie, what’s in this letter?”

She picked up one of the black rooks she’d taken, rolling it between her fingers. “Just make sure that he gets it, yeah?”

She could feel Lucy’s deep brown gaze on her, could imagine the way that the irises shifted a little from side to side as they tried to decipher what was going on inside her head. “Okay.”

“Thank you.”

Lucy nodded, slipping the envelope into the inner pocket of her suit jacket. Lizzie brought her bishop sliding across the board.

“Check.”

“I can send him to you tonight, if you’d like,” Lucy offered. Lizzie could only bring herself to look at her face for a fraction of a second before she had to look back at the chess pieces again. Anything to not have to stare at that sad, guilty look emblazoned across Lucy’s face. She shook her head.

“I doubt he’s going to want to spend the night with me after he reads what’s in that letter.”

Truth be told, a lot of the enjoyment from sleeping with Tommy had long since faded away. Physically, it was still good–the man was nothing if not very talented at what he did–but it was hard to ever fully enjoy herself when she knew that he would rather be with her. Lizzie could feel it, the disconnect between them a living, ever present thing in the spaces between them. Even when he was with her, in the most intimate of positions two people could be in, he wasn’t really with her. He always left all the important parts of himself in the other room, with Lucy.

If only the little red head in front of her wasn’t around…

She shook the thought away. That wasn’t what she wanted. Not really. For all her faults, at least Lucy tried. Certainly more than Tommy ever did. It was her, who more often than not kept Lizzie company on nights like this one. When Tommy was too enthralled with his work to be bothered to pay her any mind.

In a way, it only made Lizzie more angry with her. It would have been so much easier to hate her if she had been cruel and unapologetic in her actions.

For a time, at the beginning of her marriage to Tommy, Lizzie had hated her. She had hated her so bloody much, she nearly choked on it. But over time the feeling had…not quite faded, but scabbed over. It was hard to maintain hatred like that for so long. Especially when the person it was directed towards went out of her way to be so bloody nice and accommodating so much of the time.

Sometimes it still returned, the scab ripping off for fresh blood and agony to flow forth. And with it, the poison inside her leaked out, boiling over to spill from her lips in the form of vile curses and words. Things she may have meant in the moment, but not later. Not after she’d gotten a leash back on the jealousy that raged in her heart.

In those moments when the venom flowed forth, the looks that Lucy would give her, like that of a kicked animal, only served to make Lizzie hate her even more. Because how dare she make her feel guilty for hurting her? When she was the one who had hurt Lizzie first by stealing her husband.

But can you really steal what was already yours? What was given freely? How could she say that Lucy had stolen Tommy from her, when he had never even been hers to begin with?

Her fury was directed at Tommy too, often even more so. She suspected that was by design, on his part. His attempt to shield Lucy from her wrath and the hurtful jabs that came with it as much as possible. Yet another expression of his oh so precious, undying love for her.

Once she’d gotten it all out, the anger and resentment would scab over once more. It was in those moments that she grew as close as she could to accepting the arrangement between herself, her husband, and his lover. She and Lucy could even be considered something close to being friends.

And then they’d go through the entire cycle again.

She wondered if the scab would ever fully heal. She hoped that someday it would.

What she would give, to be at peace with her life and her choices. To be content.

But she knew that a part of her, no matter how small, would always resent Lucy.

“Do you mind if I also read it?” Lucy asked, drawing her from her thoughts. She’d moved her knight to counter Lizzie’s check on the chessboard.

“That’s fine.” She knew it would likely make no difference what she wanted; Tommy would tell her its contents either way.

She moved one of her pawns a space up.

Lucy moved her knight again. “Check.”

Lizzie moved her king, even though she could already see where the game was heading.

“You’re really thinking of leaving for good?”

She kept her gaze fixed on the chessboard, not wanting to meet Lucy’s analyzing eyes. “It depends on what he says about what’s in my letter.”

There was a long pause, and she found herself wishing that Lucy would just move her queen and put an end to the whole bloody game.

“Lizzie, maybe if you just give things some time…it’s a madhouse right now, with the crash and Michael coming back…”

“I’ve been giving things time since the fucking wedding, Lucy. And he still hasn’t–” she bit down hard on the words before she could say them. He still hasn’t changed.

Lucy stared at her sadly. “You’re still hoping that someday he’ll choose you over me?”

“Just play your bloody turn, Lucy.”

She hesitated, and then slid the black queen across the board. “Checkmate.” Her hand retracted, going to fidget with the other in her lap. Trouble roused at the cease in being pet, raising her head with a questioning meow. “Do you want to play again?”

“No,” Lizzie rose from her chair. Divorce or not, she doubted she would have to wait long to be free of them. She had watched these past few years as Tommy slipped further and further out onto a precipice, his mind almost fully lost to his own ambition. And when he finally went over the edge, he’d take Lucy right along with him. She truly believed that he wouldn’t be alive within two years’ time.

It startled her, a little, how the thought brought with it no sorrow or grief, but simply a feeling of deep, potent relief.

“I think I’m just going to go to bed.”

That infuriating guilt was shining in Lucy’s eyes again. She had to bite down on her tongue to keep from lashing out at the sight of it. Despite everything, she had meant what she said to Tommy about trying to be cordial with Lucy.

“Lizzie, you know that if you ever wanted to, the three of us could…” Lucy trailed off, biting her lip. Not needing to finish the sentence for Lizzie to know what she was referring to.

They’d made it clear that the offer was always open, if she wanted to share a bed with both of them again, rather than just Tommy. And she understood that, in a somewhat stunted way, Lucy’s offer was an attempt at comfort; at maybe even consolidation, for the situation that they’d found themselves in.

“Not tonight, Lucy.”

She saw a flicker of disappointment cross Lucy’s features, but she merely nodded, clearly having expected the answer, not pushing it any further. “Goodnight, then.”

“Goodnight.”

She just got to the door before Lucy called for her again. “Lizzie.” She was still sitting at the chessboard, one hand trailing her fingertips across the golden rings she was wearing on the other hand she had resting on Trouble’s patchy black and orange fur. Her red-painted bottom lip was caught between her teeth. “Is there anything that I can do?”

Yes: Leave. And never come back. “No.”

“But maybe–”

“Lucy,” she cut her off before she could say anymore, gesturing to the board. “Even when you go easy on me, it’s you who always wins.”

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Thank you for reading! Please consider leaving a comment, reblog, or like. I always appreciate feedback and love getting the opportunity to interact with you and hear your thoughts!

#tommy shelby #peaky blinders #lucy winters #tommy shelby x oc #lucy winters x tommy shelby #my ocs #my fanfiction #lily writes #love me where i'm most ruined #peaky blinder fanfic #peaky blinders oc #tommy shelby fanfic

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missmarveledsblog · 5 months ago

Text

FLUMPY PART 5 ( JAKE SERESIN X READER)

SUMMARY : jake start his leave and his turn to take care of y/n although she is on the mend but he more excited to spend his time with her until his parent surprise him and start meddling with the help of some friends and little intervention

warnings: roommates to lover now i guess , bradley being menace ,jake's parents ( i gave them names) doing the lords work and pushing the two together , fluffy chapter ahead .

The first month and a half flew both so fast and slow in the same time week 8 she got the cast off her arms and her ribs didn't hurt as much but she was still in the chair with how bad the break was in her leg. The dynamic with her and jake was more flirty although still neither taking that step over the line but the flirting almost had Rooster ready to go back to work... almost.

" You sure you got this i can call in sick , go awol for a day no biggie" he said getting ready.

" Rooster i got this , we do be fine when you and the nurse go on dateS" jake rolled his eyes.

" What if your too busy giving her the goo goo eyes and forget to give her the meds" .

" you'll text to remind me i'm not kidding i got this" he pushed the man towards the door.

" Bye roo enjoy your first day back" she called enjoying the freedom of feeding herself.

" Bye pretty girl... lover boy" he whispered at jake as he was out the door. Seemly a new nickname he would call him not that jake cared since he's been called worse.

" Just us now .. enjoying that sweetheart" he asked .

" Yes cause i can do it myself although i appreciate you keeping me alive" she smiled .

" Your welcome .. what on the agenda today" he asked.

" Well i'm not in the doctors til next week so this week we can go out if you want although no beach just yet still haven't got all sand out from last time"she scrunched up her nose.

" Ok how about that park with those duck you like" he asked .

" Shit when did i turn into an old man.. But yeah they're nicer than other parks" she shook her head.

" Ice cream parlour too or diner" .

" Pfft like you have to ask".

" nah only one today" he held his hand on his hip.

" ohh are you the strict parent" she whined .

" you know that is a lie" he laughed .

" ok time to practise on the crutches so i can get out of this damn chair" she wheeled over as he took them off her lap knowing she got herself stuck with them.

" five minute today" he called as she went down the ramp.

" i should get a skate board so i can keep that" she laughed.

" yeah you'll end back up in the chair again nope" he followed her out .

" let master crutches first we can get back to the skateboard" she motioned him to bring them over.

" you can do it y/n" mrs. wilson called from her porch.

" thanks we still on for golden girls later" she asked as jake help her stand.

" jesus your like a kid and old person all in one" he laughed

. " excuse you mrs wilson is a legend did you know she was a dancer in vegas" she asked .

" i didn't also didn't need that image in my head" he hand her the crutches one by one. " ok up and down if it too much don't push too hard" he sassed.

" yes sir" she wobbled before she began not used to the strain on her arms but determine to do her minimal laps.

"Ok you got one now turn easy before you give me a heart attack" he yelled ready to rush to her side .

" i got it" she grunted as the sweat came to her brows needing to get some progress til she reach him .

" hey you did it" he laughed lifting her up and spinning her in a circle . "I did it," she laughed happily .

" now try again" he placed her down helping her balance before she set off each time it got a bit easier but she was all sweaty when the five minutes were up . " Can we see the nice ducks now?" she panted. " We can see the nice ducks," he chuckled.

they fell into a routine by end of the week and the of end of her ordeal, she was able to use the crutches more and more to point she didn't need the chair which was probably best news she heard even the physio therapist was impressed with her progress . she sat was sat waiting to see the doctor after another round of x rays to check her progress.

"It can come off" she asked shocked.

" it can come off you will need this strap for couple of weeks but the cast can come off" the doctor smiled.

" i can bathe without plastic covering i think i know how the turtles felt " she beamed.

" you can bathe with out the plastic , your recovery has been astounding y/n" the doctor praise as she excitedly held onto jakes hand .

" i mean its like a shot first accident and then another one not so bad" she joked.

" no more accidents" the doctor and jake said same time. " she will still need help though as the leg will be stiff and lost of muscle density as it healed" he added.

" see i still need you jake" she teased. " ice cream to celebrate but i need you out while he takes this off " she pushed him out.

" it's gonna be hairy" she whispered to the doctor who laughed.

" i don't think you boyfriend will mind y/n i can see why my nurse miss you" he shook his head.

" he's not my.. We're not... just cut me free doc" she huffed.

" how does it feel" jake asked as she looked down as the strap it was like a booty .

" less bulky its odd" she marvel at it.

" crushing it sweetheart you'll back to busting my balls in work" he smiled although it didn't reach his eyes.

" what's going on in that pretty head of your" she asked using his words against him.

" i don't want to go back to before" he admitted almost worry on his face.

" hey now that's silly i know we'd a rough start but your one of my favourite people i promise it would be like that" she held out her pinky .

" i would laugh but rooster told me how serious you take these" he wrapped his with hers .

" very now i was good so lets get ice cream" she nodded at the door as he held it open .

" hello what can i get you sir" the woman purred as y/n brow furrowed .

" WE will get two chocolate milkshake , he'll have a scoop of rocky road and scoop of pecan , i will have a scoop of chocolate brownie and scoop of cookie dough" she spoke up wrapping her arm around jakes .

" of course can i get you anything else" she turned back to jake batting her lashes .

" nope thanks" y/n gave her a tight lipped smile.

" what was that all about" he asked hoping it was what he thought it was.

" she looked at my crutches funny" she lied .

" pretty sure sounded like someone was jealous" he smirked .

" in your dreams ... if you wanna bang the icecream lady go ahead" she rolled her eyes.

" nah wouldn't want you to get jealous" he teased .

" i was not jealous unlike you with bill down in the nice duck park" she smirked.

" i wasn't jealous he's like eighty" he scoff although he was , not his proudest moment.

" yeah ok say that to your face when he was sharing his bread crumbs with me thought poor bill was going swimming"she winced.

" ok fine i wasn't jealous neither were you" he smirked knowing the both were .

" fine but you think i got a shot with bill or not cause dude always get the best ducks" she joked .

" i get you the good ducks next time" he shrugged.

" knew you were jealous" she laughed .

The flirty tension didn't stopped as they drove home , it was amping up to little touches as they pulling into the drive way only to see rooster and an older couple talking on the porch.

" what the".

" you know them?" she asked trying to get a better look leaning over him he almost forgot how to talk.

" my parents" he laughed .

" go say hi" she smiled going to get out only for him to help her out handing her the crutches .

" mama , pops what you doing here" he called from the car as she tried to hid not knowing why but she was suddenly shy and nervous as hell.

" hey baby boy , this lovely man bradley called so we could surprise you , is that her oh jake she is a beauty" his mother hugged him .

" mama hush" he hissed. " mama , pops this is my darling... my darling friend y/n" he felt his own cheeks burn.

" hi nice to meet you both sorry sort of slow moving" she got in front holding her hand out .

" oh its finally nice to meet you sweet girl , jakes told us all about you please call me beth" she hugged her making sure to be careful.

" all good things i hope" she squeaked .

" oh the best even the good duck park and call me john" he smiled hugging her next.

" what is it with you and that park" rooster head tilted.

" their cute" she defended.

" well i got to go but these two can keep you company , make em see sense" he smiled running off to the car.

" lets go inside she looking little pale" his mom sassed.

" yes ma'am .. beth " she stumbled over her words as they walked in . jake stood only praying and hoping they kept their mouths shut.

" ohh look at you so cute as a baby , what happened?" she cooed as the hope and prayer went unanswered as his mom pulled out his baby pictures.

" i'm still cute excuse you missy" he poked her side making her laugh as the other shared a look .

" course you are jakey" sarcasm hiding the truth.

"Oh this is him in a muddy puddle free as day he was born except boots and his hat little cute ... " .

" ok that enough of the pictures" he dived over taking them out of her hand .

" i'll show you another time" beth whispered.

" so we heard you been through a rough ride" he dad said.

" yeah the guy that done it took a plea deal which sucks but i'm out of all the casts and jakes been helping me alot really he's a credit to you both" she smiled .

" well it works out since you saved my ass with a room and i didn't have to stay at the base again" he smiled back at her.

" cause i'm the best roommate really" .

" even if she snores like a bear" he laughed.

" i snore like a kitten" she shot back.

" kittens don't make the walls shake" .

" that's roo" she flushed .

" you wanna show me that hanger thursday" his dad asked. " oh we can go for lunch" beth cheered excitedly.

" i guess that our plans thursday" . " you can show me his muddy puddle pic" she whispered .

" of course" the woman winked as jakes face fell.

" oh oh you can introduce him to my dad" she added.

" don't say that" jake laughed.

" wait maverick" john asked excitedly.

" he's a big fan of your dad" jake explained.

"He's a legend in the navy of course i am" .

"he's a cool ass dude y/n here grew up with all the legends around her".

" i mean i wasn't going to join the navy but i did go into a similar field of aeronautical engineering i can't wait to get back to work" she sighed a little sadly.

" wow smart too such a catch ... for some lucky guy" his mom cooed looking pointedly at her son.

" i do have to go car shopping the weekend with my dad we can bring your folk hard deck after" she smiled . " we'd love that we're staying two weeks bradley even got us free stay in an air b&b for those weeks" john smiled.

" well we better go we need to freshen up was a long flight and we followed bradley here is ok to visit in between our stay" his mom asked.

" of course always welcome also here put your number in we can sort details for lunch" she handed over her phone .

" i'll walk y'all out" jake smiled .

" it was so good to meet you".

" good to meet you darling girl can't wait for lunch" his mom yelled. " oh we love her" she said as they walked to the car.

" we're not only ones i don't think i've seen him so smitten" his dad grinned.

" you know your sisters are dying to meet her too" .

" can y'all relax we just became friends i mean yeah i think i may be in deep here but she only forgiven me i may of called her flumpy and said some unsavoury things and you two are planning our wedding here " he whispered only for his mother to swat him . " ouch we're good now and i mean there something there but i don't wanna rush it" he said .

" don't let a girl like her go son , she perfect for you" .

" i know she too perfect that why i wanna take my time i don't was scre..mess it up" he sighed.

" open your eyes boy and see things clearly" his mom kissed his cheek and his father hugged him before the two left.

" their right" mrs wilson called making him jump.

" you keep it under wraps too" he rolled his eyes heading back in to the house.

...........................

" JAKE" she yelled making him rush to her room in the middle of getting dressed to bring his father to the hanger.

" what's wrong" he asked.

" you think this is ok for lunch with you mom" she asked looking down at the sundress almost similar to the one he first ever saw her well awake and not covered with rooster hoodie. " jake?" she asked tilting her head.

" ye..yep that perfect you look .. wow" he fell over his words wondering what the hell was wrong with him.

" oh my dad promised to give your dad grade A tour whatever the hell that means but penny said it was good " she smiled trying to clip her necklace in place.

" here let me" he said coming behind her finger brushing her as he took it in his hand .

" thank you my hero" she giggled.

" you really look beautiful" he smiled eyes locked on her through the reflection of the mirror.

" thank you" she whispered a different smile a new one maybe his new favourite .

" you ready" rooster asked making them jump apart.

" yup ready" she called voice doing the weird thing it seem to do when she was nervous around him.

" i'll see you later darling" he smiled kissing her cheek before walking out counting it as a small victory . " that mans gonna kill me roo" she held her cheek goofy smile on her face. " the pinning is killing me" he whispered.

" over here dear i invited your friend and stepmother" beth called . " more the merrier" she smiled as they walked in . " look at you hotty" nat called . " says the one" she winked . " you look amazing" penny smiled.

" you are way too hot for my dad" she nodded.

" ok ladies shall we order" .

" please i am starving" y/n cheered.

" oh the picture as promised" beth smiled.

" haha nat here take a picture" she snickered handing over her phone then sending it to jake .

" not first time you've seen his ass or the last and don't get me started on the magic mike situation" nat rolled her eyes.

" yeah your dad was traumatised" penny giggled.

" what situation"beth asked.

" oh the first night i was home him and roo came into my room like almost naked and i mean this with the greatest respect great job anyways i may of told them to go shirtless not knowing my dad was there" she snorted as the waiter arrived at wrong time . they quickly ordered as the man rushed off.

" so why the whole well whatever".

" because we just became friends i don't wanna ruin that" .

" the way that boy talks about you i doubt anything you could do could ruin it" penny said truthfully.

" he never stopped when he would call home i mean i feel like i know you already" beth added. " and when he was at the base well he wanted to get back incase you needed him , he stopped sleeping around too... sorry" nat informed .

" what if i'm reading it wrong and make idiot of myself" .

" your being idiots now" nat bluntly said.

" y/n hey can we talk" a voice called.

part 6

taglist : @harrysgothicbitch

@djs8891 @darksparklesficrecs

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averydavery · 4 days ago

Text

The Like A Dragon Infinite Wealth Problem

Ichiban sprite WIP for my (admittedly self-indulgent) fangame

Pseudo-essay and ramblings below the cut

Tldr:

I’m a sore, butt-hurt player who feels a bit cheated and a lot disappointed.

Critical Rating- 8/10

Personal Rating- 6.5/10

SPOILERS AHEAD

So I’m writing this as of just finishing the game. Mind you, it took me about three-fourths of this year to beat LAD8. Not because it was challenging but because one thing or another pissed me off so much, I had to put it down for extended periods of time. Now I want to get my glazing out of the way so you understand the things that I’m 100% not bashing here and a lot of my criticisms just have to deal with how RGG studio as a whole has become as storytellers and developers.

But most obviously addicting was the gameplay. This is probably one of my favorite turn-based RPGs in terms of mechanics and strategy— and I played BG3 this year. It improved everything that was in 7 and added only more things worth liking, especially the inclusion of Kiryu breaking the entire physics and reverting to just pummeling someone. I thought that was a really endearing touch. Also, out of all the games I’ve put on the TV, this was the one my dad enjoyed watching most. For context, my dad is a fifty-three year old man who only plays first-person shooters and has no interest in any other kind of game. I play with subtitles too and he’s usually not a fan of that since he has poor vision but he LOVED watching the silly little “essence of” moves. He genuinely got excited whenever I did a shit ton of damage on an enemy lmao. Also in my dorm I have a poster of Ichiban and my dad pointed at it recently and said “I know that guy! He beats up people with his magical bat!” … literally sobbed.

Besides the gameplay, it had nice quality of life improvements from 7 which was to be expected. Although I am VERY opinionated in terms of the story, my favorite part was Eiji and Ichiban’s development. The ending scene had such a cyclical feel to it that kind of reigned in some of the craziness to remind the viewer that the first “new” character Ichiban met was Eiji and a lot of Ichi’s expository conflicts were the result of his actions. I thought out of all the antagonists, he was the most realized and motivated as well. A lot of the more shocking moments I cared for had him in it— either explicitly or implicitly. Also not to mention the “bon voyage” motif, that was adorable.

Other things I enjoyed a lot were Dondoko Island, what a great in-depth mini game that at times I’d much rather play than the main story, and Chitose and Tomizawa. I liked both of them a lot, I thought the were sweet additions, it’s just Chitose had a lot of bearing on the story in regards to Eiji and I wish I could see it through. She wasn’t in the ending much at all and I feel like since she was so guarded we didn’t see her personality very much. Tomi was a much smaller part of the story which was a bummer but regardless, he certainly didn’t bother me and I like him for what he’s there for! Also he’s the most down-to-earth and relatable character on the team so that perspective was nice.

Okay now onto why I didn’t like this game so much.

I enjoyed this game really up until Kiryu went back to Yokohama and got his own team. Everything I disliked about the plot could be traced back to starting around that chapter. If you boil it down, this game introduces itself as being a continuation of Ichiban’s story and revolving around him. But when we take ahold of Kiryu it reveals itself to be a game centered around both of them. And one side of the story is about a new, fresh, and beloved character we players are always excited to play as… and the other is Kiryu.

I’m gonna rip the band-aid off now: I am sick of Kiryu. Do I think he deserves a better ending than in 6? Yes. Have I played Gaiden? No. Do I think that they should’ve found a way to end his story in Gaiden? Yes.

We as players have spent SEVEN AND A HALF games playing as Kiryu, from 0 to Gaiden. I think it’s not a stretch to say they need to give him a rest. I wish everything that happened with Kiryu at the end of this game was either put into Gaiden and RGG had marketed that game as “the true twilight era and ending of Kiryu Kazuma” or been experienced through the eyes of Ichiban. After all, it felt like Kiryu was upstaging Ichiban more or less in his own game and not in a good way. If this game was supposed to be truly “shared” between the two of them then they shouldn’t have made Ichiban such a focal point and made it like some grand scheme visualized through two different lenses like they did with Kiryu and Majima in 0. Every time I was back at the helm of Kiryu was just biding my time until I was Ichiban again! And call this an original take (sarcasm), but I don’t think a game should be played like that.

Not to mention that RGG now has a habit of making the game unplayable by forcing the player to spend hours leveling up to beat a boss and while I think that’s a clever way to get the player to spend more hours in their game— I definitely think we can all agree that spending time grinding to level up or to get new poundmates was no one’s favorite part of the story. So not only am I trying to rush through Kiryu’s story that I’m bored by, the game forces me to stay playing as him which only makes me hate that half of the game more.

I also think this series has really lost its spark, it set a standard that the conflict has to be so large, so all-encompassing and complex that it doesn’t really know what story its telling. What I mean is done best in 3 which is my favorite game in terms of story, is because of its scope. Sure, the US is involved so the issue is slightly international and there is some silly, yakuza-brand confusion but 3 is solely focused on that little town in Okinawa. Everything came back to Kiryu’s attempt to settle down there and how the Tojo Clan still seemed to follow him all they to his doorstep. The plot was localized and familiar characters like Majima and Dojima made decisions remotely from Kiryu, while new faces like Rikiya and Mine got to shine. In 8, the scale is so large and is trying its best to be so fanservice-y that the story of “Ichiban finding his mom” is lost completely in the cracks.

Also the cult shit. I know this RGG but even for their standards, this was stupid and not in a silly way. I was just groaning.

Not to mention, Lani is a character I felt no emotion towards. I wish the story was solely been about Ichiban finding his mom and it had spanned the entirety of the story, rather than the player being told “well, Akane isn’t the important one that Palekana is looking for it’s actually this random kid she’s protecting that you don’t know anything about or have an attachment to instead.” I think if they had, again, narrowed the scope and simplified the plot to be Ichiban searching for his mom— it could’ve been way more emotional and impactful. They could’ve even tried to achieve that Twin Peaks “who killed Laura Palmer?” vibe. Be which I mean, a very simple question or sentence could’ve been expanded upon tenfold.

I don’t know, this has gone on long enough. What do you think?

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jesncin · 2 months ago

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Hello! I'm not sure if you read the Actions Comics #1074, but I wanted to get this thought out of my head. Spoilers ahead!

Clark got sent back in time when Krypton has yet to be destroyed. After saving a stranger from a malfunctioning flying bot, he was sent to Krypton Hospital and, after he was given treatment, a meal, and new set of clothes, he immediately went to place Lara and Jor-El were.

I couldn't help but think his sudden visit to Lara and Joe-El reminded me of how in some Asian countries, you could just walk into your neighbor's home, usually without a prior notice, and just...eat with them, talk with them, and other activities. I remember someone talking about how in their country, they would go to their neighbor's home so much and help them with chores like laundry, they knew the days when that neighbor does which chores and always got meal going there.

In my country, the Philippines, my grandpa's neighbors would just appear with no notice, and give my grandparents company!

Indeed, Clark did send some sort of message about his visit to that Lara received, but he immediately left from the Krypton Hospital to the place of Lara and Jor-El's, and even though the Science Council is conceited, the communal spirit must be so strong for Lara to just accept this stranger's sudden and quick request for a meeting, even though she doesn't know them.

just...something about community and how people just helping each other because they want to, which bring about an easier life and also a joyful one

Anyway! What comics have you recently read? I think Absolute Superman is out now! Have you read Absolute Superman? What do you think about it?

I gave said Action Comics issue a quick read!

It's definitely not intentional in the story, but it does serve as a nice jumping off point to thinking of Krypton as having a type of collectivist communal mindset for treating thy neighbors. Part of what fascinates me about Kryptonian worldbuilding is exploring what the idea of a doomed utopia could be like. I'd personally love to see writers pull inspiration from cultural philosophies like Gotong Royong or Bayanihan, along with challenging human structures of gender, class and spirituality. An indigenous-inspired Krypton would be phenomenal.

But as long as DC Comics continues to be a reflection of a white dominant industry, we're not going to get anything like that soon. The Action Comics story is charming enough, I like seeing Clark try out Kryptonian clothes and mention that he has a language barrier, but the white imagination can only go so far without having lived it.

I have read Absolute Superman! My feelings about it are actually pretty similar. I'm glad I wasn't excited for AbsoSupes because it sounded boring from the promos, and turns out, it (the first issue at least) was indeed dull. Something Absolute Superman shares in common with Absolute Batman is that it doesn't stand on its own. These takes rely on being contrarian (what they call "subversive") to their source material. If I didn't know anything about Superman, I'd honestly think this was a pretty generic alien superhero story.

I notice most of the people enjoying AbsoSupes are praising it because they've done 80 years of Superman homework to get all its references and recognize what it's twisting. But I think an over-reliance on expecting your audience to do reading pre-requisites to even like a story at all is weak. Absolute Wonder Woman on the other hand, is an outstanding, mythic take on the character- no homework required, just genuinely compelling characterization and storytelling.

(spoilers for Absolute Superman #1)

To bring this back to my feelings on Krypton, Superman writers and DC as a company; I think stuff like Man Of Steel, that Krypton tv show, MAWS and Absolute Superman reflect the very limits of the white imagination. New Superman writers are no longer invested in exploring Superman's origin planet as a utopia, because that's not something white people can relate to or fathom. Instead, they'd rather Krypton be a direct reflection of Earth's problems.

Kryptonians are now colonizers, classist and bigoted. Krypton is no longer the land of the future sending down their one hope to guide the imperfect people of Earth into a better tomorrow. There's no appealing contrast between Earth and Krypton anymore, and because of that- Kal El becomes an exception from Planet Colonizer. He's just some decent guy from the other equally shitty country. It's not that you can't make an interesting hero from that, but I've certainly seen that guy many times before. It's nothing new.

Kal now doesn't have a cast system and wanders around on his own, I've seen how that kind of character struggles because I've read Martian Manhunter stories. Kal talks to his suit because he's Iron Man now I guess. Kal was actually more grown up when he was on Krypton instead of a baby, so... just like Supergirl is in canon- well that's not new either. Lois Lane is a government agent here, because why have characters who occupy unique jobs like being a librarian or a journalist when you can make them yet another cop or agent? When the biggest personal experience integrated into Kal your Absolute Superman writer boasts about is how he's the first writer who is actually from Kansas to write Superman, this is what you get.

#askjesncin #jesncin dc meta #i know people love mark waid as a supes writer but be serious #is the guy who wrote Strange Fruit really going to give you the immigrant Superman story you deserve #i heard waid loved maws to the point he wish he thought of those ideas and I can't speak to the levels of dumb that makes him sound #media criticism #longish post?

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berryhobii · 1 year ago

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Hi queen hope your day is going great ❤️

Can I request bf!jungkook x black thick reader reader showing off her new bikinis that she recently purchased to him ( you don’t have to make it a smut if you don’t want to ʕ·ٹ·ʔ)

Thanks so much for your request! I hope you enjoy and please leave feedback if you want🩵I made this very fluffy and a little suggestive as well.

Impromptu fashion shows were a favorite of yours. Whenever you purchased new clothes, you just had to try them on at home even if you already tried them on at the store. You didn’t get your boyfriend to install that big ass mirror with built in lights for nothing.

Jungkook was sitting on the couch watching television when he heard you burst through the front door.

“I’m home, love!” You called, toeing off your shoes before entering the living room. Multiple shopping bags lined your arms, all of different sizes and colors.

He stood to his feet, coming over to help you with all of the bags. “Here, sweet. Let me help.”

“Thanks.”

“You sure bought a lot of things. Is this all for our vacation?” He asked as you two walked back to your bedroom.

“Yup!” You chirped. “There was a sale and I couldn’t resist.”

After he placed all of the bags down, he turned to you to give you some much appreciated affection. You were way ahead of him, wrapping your arms around his body to snuggle into him.

“I missed you.” You fluttered your eyelashes at him, tilting your head back to receive some pecks on the lips which he gratefully gave you.

His hands ran up and down your back, trailing down to your ass to give it a squeeze, almost lifting you off the ground.

“Missed you too.” He mumbled against your lips, rocking you two back and forth. After basking in the love for a moment, you pulled away.

“I want to show you all of the things I got.” You excitedly clapped, going over to start sorting through your bags. As you did that, Jungkook went to sit on the bed, leaning back on his hands and eyes focused on you.

Jungkook couldn’t help but admire and gaze upon you. You were just so perfect in his eyes. His heart swelled with love as he watched you pull random things out of the shopping bags, chattering about how you found them or how you caught a sale. He just loved seeing you so happy and passionate about something. And he loved being able to spoil you, not even caring about his credit card statement because it was all for you. He just wanted to give you the world.

He also wanted to give you a bite on that incredibly juicy ass. Everytime you bent over to grab something out of another bag, he was reminded of this morning when he bent you over the bathroom counter as you were moisturizing your coils. You barely got out of the door to meet your girlfriends on time, having to stop yourself from licking every inch of your boyfriend. And from him licking every inch of you…..again.

You made an excited noise, signaling you found something you really wanted to show him.

Turning to him, you held up some pieces of fabric but he couldn’t really tell what they were.

“I also got these swimsuits. They were 4 for 1. Don’t you love this color?”

He smiled at you. “Yeah it’s beautiful, sweet. I’m sure you’ll look gorgeous in them.”

“I’m gonna try them on! Wait right here!” You jumped on your toes before skipping over to the bathroom and shutting the door behind you.

While he waited, he looked through one of the bags closest to him, finding a few dresses and a new pair of denim shorts that he could imagine you in now.

“You’re definitely taking these.” He said to himself.

Right as he was about to snoop through another bag, the bathroom door opened and you stepped out.

His jaw could have unhinged itself from how hard it dropped.

A wide smile spread across your face, your feet taking you across the room to stand before your large mirror. It also just so happened to be right across from the bed so Jungkook got a front row seat to your curvy backside.

The dark purple fabric popped against your brown skin, the strings tied carefully on your wide hips to keep the bottoms up. His eyes practically swallowed you whole, gulping down a block in his throat as you ran your hands up your own body. You were just checking yourself out innocently but the way you were doing it was sending pulses straight to his cock.

You finally turned towards him, a hopeful and happy expression on your face.

“What do you think?” You spread your arms and wiggled your fingers.

The front was just as good as the back. The top was halter fashion, your full breasts sitting nicely and almost spilling out of the sides.

Biting his lip and trying to control his raging boner, he got out an, “I love it, sweets. The color looks great on you.”

Your happiness soared at your boyfriend’s approval. While you were body confident and didn’t need anyone telling you if they liked how you dressed, you just absolutely loved when your boyfriend complimented you. You loved dressing up and looking nice for him just as much as yourself. The whole reason you went shopping was to gather a wardrobe for the couple’s vacation you were attending with some of you and Jungkook’s friends. The plans actually made it out of the group chat and in about 2 weeks, you’d be on a plane with your best friends and your man for a week long vacation in Costa Rica. You were so excited!

“Okay! I’m gonna go put on the next one.”

The next one was a black and white one piece with a large bow across the chest. More modest but equally as cute.

“I like this one too.” And he did. He thought you looked great in anything.

Your next choice was a green and white two piece with a cover up skirt.

“This one is so cute! Can’t you just imagine me lounging by a pool? A margarita in hand? And one of those big floppy hats?” You twirled around, posing as if you had a hat on your head.

Yes he could. Your brown skin would soak in the sunlight, relaxation seeping out of every pore on your body. He just knew you’d look gorgeous with luxury and sunlight painting you.

“Come here, sweet.” He beckoned you. Of course, you came right over to stand between his legs, your hands going to push his hair back out of his face. He’s been letting it grow out lately and you’ve been loving it—playing with it, braiding it……..gripping it when he ate you out. He talked about getting a little trim before you went of vacation so you were basking in it for the time being.

His warm palms ran up the sides of your legs, chin resting on your lower belly to stare up at you.

“I’m so excited for our trip.” You said, running a thumb across his eyebrow to his piercing. That was certainly a welcomed addition to his lip piercing and his new sleeve of tattoos. He’s also been working harder in the gym so he just looked extra delicious lately. And the whole alternative bad boy aesthetic was sort of a turn on to you. He already had a full sleeve when you met him and it definitely fed your fantasies. And now that he was officially all yours, those fantasies were becoming true every day.

Fantasy number 43: A vacation in a humid place with your buff and tattooed boyfriend? Yes please!

“Me too. I can’t wait to see you in all of these clothes.”

“Really? I feel like I got too much.”

He hummed. “Doesn’t matter. Just make sure I get to take them off at the end of the night.”

You rolled your eyes at his suggestive tone but you’d be lying if you said it didn’t send shocks down your body.

Your hand pulled at his hair, tilting his head back. A grunt rumbled in his chest, hands gripping at your ass. “How about we practice now?”

Jungkook gripped you tighter, laying back and bringing you down with him. Squeals of laughter came from you as Jungkook pressed kisses all over your face.

“Should I show you the lingerie I got too?”

Oh yeah. This would be the best vacation ever.

#bts #bts smut #bts x black reader #jungkook smut #askberryhobii

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rustingcat · 1 year ago

Text

Vigilante

Kara was late.

She hated being late, but the amount of paperwork she had to sign was much larger than she anticipated, and the lack of signal in the classified room in the DEO meant that she couldn't alert Lena on time.

Kara made it to the lab an hour later, more exhausted than she realised.

"Kara! Is everything okay?" Lena asked the moment Kara put her bag down.

"Yes, I'm so sorry for the delay. I had to sign a LOT of papers for the DEO." Lena seemed so engulfed in the work, their work. The last thing she wanted was for Lena to feel like she's forced to take on the load.

"The DEO? Did something happen?" The worry in her voice was clear. Kara put a reassuring smile on her face to take some of it away.

"Yes, yes. I just signed an employment contract, I'm officially no longer a vigilante!" Kara said with a small chuckle.

"Oh, why the change? I remember you weren't a fan of working for the government before, especially with everything that went down with Colonel Hailey." Lena walked closer to her, a concern not completely gone.

"Well, now that my identity is public knowledge, Alex was very adamant in reminding me how open I am for lawsuits. Both private ones and from the government, like they could potentially sue me for stuff they ask me to do! How crazy is that?"

"Did you sign it already? I could go over it to make sure they don't put any peculiar articles or subsections."

"It's ok, Alex is still in touch with Lucy Lane. They went over the contract together several times before presenting it to me. Lucy is really good with this stuff." She reassured her.

"So you're a government official?"

"Yeah, free from any Supergirl related lawsuits, and with some pretty sweet tax benefits. Plus all of the salary they wanted to give me is going to go to different kinds of selected charities of my choosing, so that's awesome."

"I'm glad it all worked out."

"Me too." Kara breathed in relief.

"I have some news, too." Lena said as an excited smile spread on her face.

"Do tell," Kara said, biting her lip as a smile matching Lena started spreading.

"Okay, while you were off signing what was no doubt a mountain of paperwork," Kara nodded, "I found and fixed the problem with the distributor." Lena proclaimed proudly.

"What was the problem?" Kara asked, matching her excitement.

"We switched the materials connecting it to the compressor, but not the ones connected to the bio-terminal!" She explained quickly, her hands moving around in excited blur to match.

"Oh Rao! So it means–"

"We can start testing!"

"Ahh- Lena that's amazing!" Kara crushed into her best friend, giving her the big tight hug she deserves. She absolutely loved hugging Lena, really she took any opportunity she got. Feeling her warp around her tightly as if not wanting to let go, her smell that somehow always smelled amazing and feeling her heartbeat so close to hers. Hugging Lena was amazing, and she really deserved the most amazing hug after that discovery.

"Wait, we don't have their DNA to test it with." Kara noted once they pulled away.

"It's just a test to see if it can even process something like that, It doesn't have to be theirs. We already have exactly what we need." Lena explained.

"What do you mean?" Kara was confused, they didn't collect any DNA ahead of time.

"Samples of two specimens of the same biological sex, not to mention a combination of human and non-human DNA." Lena smiled at her.

"Oh." The room suddenly felt hotter. "Yeah, no… yes I see. Yeah that- that would definitely work." They would be combining their DNA. She and Lena. Their biological data would be combined. Kara felt very normal about this.

"Will you be able to extract some of your blood? If not, we can try saliva." Lena asked and she started to look around for the tubes.

"I think I can," Kara answered, looking at her fingers in an attempt to decide which one would be easier to cut. It's not like she would have to worry about the long term effect of the wound as it would heal once she stepped out into the sun.

Lena was already grabbing a syringe by the time Kara decided to go with her thumb, hoping to make the surface of the wound big enough to extract more blood.

She checked with her tongue to see which of her teeth is the sharpest –her upper left fang, and attempted her first try. It was painful, yet unsuccessful. She braced herself for the unavailable pain and tried again. The metallic taste in her mouth paired with the pounding pain in her finger told her she was successful. She took out her thumb and tried to lift it in a way that no blood would spill out. She held it above the tube Lena handed to her, letting the small drops fill it as much as she could, squeezing a bit despite the pain, until she was satisfied with the amount.

A quick walk to the window, letting the reflected rays of the sunshine upon her finger, fixed the little cut she created. She only wished Lena had similar powers. The syringe made her cut relatively small, but a cut was still a cut in Kara’s book. Lena was pressing a small piece of cotton to her arm, holding it tightly as she worked.

Kara walked closer to her. She was healed at this point and just as familiar with the machine as Lena, it was her turn to put on some work. She took Lenas wounded arm and gave it a small kiss to make it better. Lena's cheeks were immediately coloured with a light share of pink.

"All better now." Kara smiled at her. "Do you mind if I take it from here? You can keep pressing on the arm."

Lena simply nodded.

Inserting their blood samples carefully, Kara directed the machine to start the process. It was odd, she thought to herself, seeing all of the biological specification options for the combined data of her and Lena's DNA. Afraid to make a mistake, she slowly pressed on each button, choosing to unspecify everything before starting the process.

Kara looked at Lena with an exciting smile, biting down both her upper and bottom lips in the anticipation.

"And now we wait." Lena smiled back.

They watched in silence as the machine processed their data, searching for any errors or possible problems. They went through the math and the coding multiple times, they were at the very least confident in their work. The test was not to see a baby going through a full term, that process would take a few months even in their very advanced machine. Not to mention that due to the possibility of success, they knew that their first test subject should be for people who would be willing parents. So the test itself was only to see if the machine can prepare their given data to what could later become an embryo and then a healthy fetus should they choose to continue.

The process bar got closer to the end. No errors yet.

Lena was still pressing on her wound as she followed the process bar closely with her eyes. Kara wasn't sure if it was worry, tension or excitement on her face. Probably a combination of the three. She couldn't say she was faring any better, chewing in her bottom lip with similar emotions.

The bar got closer to the end. 97%, 98%, 99%, 100%.

Kara instinctively inhaled quickly. Holding her breath until the bar disappeared completely, replaced by a 'process complete' message on the screen.

"Oh my god!" She heard Lena exhale in relief.

"It worked!" Kara turned to face her, mouth wide open in shock and excitement.

"It did!" Lena confirmed in amazement.

They were hugging again before Kara fully realised she was doing it. Jumping in excitement in Lena’s arms as the latter laughed in response. When she settled down she noticed how close their faces were to each other, she could feel the heat radiating off of Lena's face warm her own. Suddenly their excited hearts became louder to her ears as she watched Lena wet her own lips. Kara instinctively mimicked the movement. They stayed like that for a moment, before Lena suddenly pulled away. Kara felt a pang of disappointment she could not name.

"I should check on this one project before I leave for today. Could you finish everything here?" Lena hurried to find her back, refusing to meet Kara's eyes.

"Sure," she had no problem wrapping everything herself. "What do you want to do with the PF?" It was the name they decided on for a successful processed DNA combination, a shorthand for Potential Fetus.

"It's not important, you can dispose of it." Lena finished collecting her stuff and exited before Kara could respond.

"Right." She muttered to the empty room. The project she went to check on must've been important.

Kara turned her attention back to the machine. She was familiar with the options, she designed the UI herself after all, yet they gave her pause. The button to proceed to the next stage had somehow become the most fascinating thing in the world. Flash images of small hands, a wild patch of dark hair and big striking green eyes passed through her mind in quick succession. She only noticed she clicked the button once a warning message asking her if she was sure she'd like to proceed popped up on the screen. Small panic went through her body as she realised what she almost did, Rao she almost greenlighted the creation of a baby for her and Lena.

She quickly pressed no, and moved on to check the other options. She had no need to restart the process to respect the bio-data for the PF, nor make changes to the DNA. She stared at the button to terminate the PF and all data related to it, but couldn't bring herself to do it. The images flashed her mind again. She wasn't sure what it was but she couldn't bring herself to do it, she couldn't press the button.

A message from Lena asking if she wanted a ride home made her notice the time. She sent her a quick message saying she would be right there, and turned back to the machine. Kara made a quick decision to store the data for later use, just in case they wanted to reexamine it, of course. Plus it was their first success, it could also be a reminder of their progress.

Kara finished turning off whatever unnecessary parts to keep the power consumption at a minimum, went over everything twice and spared a moment to stare at the container, before she left.

The images followed her to her dream that night, along with a familiar dimpled smile by her side.

Read in order in AO3

#look at them #succeeding in making a potential baby #that means nothing right?#supercorp #supergirl #kara danvers #lena luthor #supercorptober #supercorptober2023 #my art #my fic

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its-time-to-write · 1 year ago

Text

Hi y’all! This is my last unprompted angsty fic for a little! Gonna go back to our usually scheduled hijinks that are sitting in my request pile, I wanted to do this one first. I write all these as a way to deal with things that happen in my own life, whether it’s stressing about school and work, stupid romance, great romance, family, health, whatever, and I wanted to say (yet again) thank you for all the support. Sometimes I still can’t believe that you all like what I write but hey, there ya go

It’s funny, because my most popular fics are the ones that have been written directly out of my actual life. The ones that start out hard-to-deal-with, or with real, palpable heartbreak. The endings are often different because real life isn’t guaranteed a happy ending, but I’m allowed to take the past and see what it would be like if things went differently.

My characterization of Jamie is based on the only person I’ve ever really loved, which is why I can write his voice so clearly. I first watched Ted Lasso and was surprised at how similar they were, stupid hair and all. A lot of these fics are my way of archiving our story and immortalizing parts of it, as well as reminding myself that the love was there. It didn’t last and it wasn’t supposed to, but it was there.

Now, what’s real and what’s fiction? I’ll leave that up to you to decide, but I will say that it’s more than you might think and less than you might hope for.

So if you read this current fic and think, “huh, that was a really specific premise,” well I got news for you! It is. I’m in the first part of my journey on this, the early stages, and this story is not the way I want things to go for me. But I’m hoping that by creating a good ending out of a rough beginning, I can better face whatever lies ahead for me whether I approach it on my own two feet or with the assistance of some really sick wheels.

Anyway, enjoy this or skip it, it won’t hurt my feelings!

how to love being alive

Jamie’s at training when he gets the call. He barely registers the words on the other side when he’s cursing something awful, enough to make Roy Kent blush, and saying something about an emergency before speeding out the door. He pauses for a moment to look up an address in his phone, then he’s tearing out of the parking lot in a manner that puts Colin to shame.

To summarize, he’s not acting like himself.

He pulls up to a chiropractor of all places and the girl at the front desk must be able to tell who he’s here for because she just points to a door down the hall. Jamie’s pretty sure he’s never moved this quick in his life and wonders if this could translate to the pitch. Sure he’s fast, but he could always be faster.

He bursts through the door to see you borderline catatonic, staring at the floor while a doctor pats your arm. She looks at Jamie and says, “Let’s chat for a minute outside,” before he has a chance to say a single thing. Jamie can’t tear his eyes away from you as the doctor leads him out and shuts the door.

“Thought emergency contacts were for like, hospitals and shit,” he says.

The chiropractor shakes her head. Jamie notes that her name tag says “Dr. Hadley,” and has a vague memory of you mentioning her a few months ago.

God, it feels like a lifetime ago.

“We’re not confident she’s in a fit state to get herself home,” Dr. Hadley says. “Her headspace is a little messed up, which is to be expected. Usually people come to these types of appointments with some moral support.”

Jamie asks, “What kinds of appointments?” and Dr. Hadley tilts her head at him.

“You are Mr. Tartt, aren’t you?” she asks and Jamie just scoffs because he can’t decide between responding obviously, or telling her no, he’s not Mr. Tartt, that’s his father. He’s just Jamie.

Dr. Hadley knows who he is because she doesn’t live in a hole in the ground, so she doesn’t ask for identification. She takes his scoff as permission to keep talking, so she says, “She’s here for her MRI results. We’ve been in the process of treating a protrusion on her spine.”

Jamie is positive everyone in this office must think he’s on drugs because Dr. Hadley is talking like he’s supposed to know this, but for the life of him he knows you’d never said a thing.

“Your girlfriend has been in a severe amount of pain over the last few months, and we’ve finally been able to see the extent of the problem. Apparently she thought it would just go away, but it never did. So now she’s here with us.”

“She’s not my girlfriend,” Jamie says automatically. Because it’s true, innit? You’re not. You’ve been broken up for a month because he couldn’t take it anymore, couldn’t take the irritation at attending his matches and the tossing and turning in bed at night and the fact that you were wound so tight that you’d snap at the most minor offenses.

You hadn’t been surprised when Jamie said he couldn’t do it anymore, it’s over, and at the time he had wished that you’d shown just a tiny sliver of emotion. After all, a year and two months is a long time to be with someone for you to coldly slide him his key and then turn away as though he were a stranger.

He could have sworn there was a glimmer of tears in your eyes, but they’d looked that way for a bit now so maybe it was just allergies. There’s no reason for you to have been in the verge of tears for the entire month before the breakup, right?

Right.

But he can’t think about that now because Dr. Hadley is frowning at him in a way that so comically reminds him of Roy’s sister that he has to bite back a laugh.

Everything’s all twisted.

“I certainly hope your split was amicable,” Dr. Hadley says. “You’re the only one listed as her emergency contact. She needs someone to get her home safely.”

“Right,” says Jamie. “Yes. Fuck. Right. Um, what exactly is wrong with her?”

Dr. Hadley shakes her head. “That’s her personal information to share with you at her prerogative. And we should probably go see her, I’m sure she doesn’t want to be alone for long.”

Jamie snorts at that. This doctor doesn’t know you at all. If you’ve received any type of bad news the last thing you want is people hanging around.

Jamie used to pride himself on being the only one you’d let into the bad-new bubble.

You don’t count with those other people, you’d said once while wrapped around Jamie so tight he thought he’d have to call Ted to bring a crowbar. You said, I don’t have to pretend around you. I don’t ever get tired of you.

Jamie bitterly thinks that that statement turned out to be a lie, but he shakes it off because you’ve only been separated a month, and apparently he’s still your emergency contact for a doctor he didn’t know you had been seeing and fuck if you didn’t look like the most pitiful thing he’d ever seen. He’ll pretend it’s ok for as long as it takes to get you home and comfortable, and then he’s calling this office to get his number switched off.

So he follows Dr. Hadley back into the room as she softly says your name in order to break whatever trance has you studying the carpet like your final exam is in ten minutes.

You can barely look at her as she whispers something about going home and being gentle, to which you nod and finally look at Jamie.

He wonders if you recognize him, because the stare you have is so vacant that you might as well be looking at a stranger.

“Is she on drugs?” he asks because it looks like you’re on drugs.

Dr. Hadley shakes her head and holds out her arm to help you up. “No, she’s just in a lot of pain. And emotional distress. It’s a killer combo, and she’ll need extra gentle handling for a while. No sitting for too long, no bending, no lifting. There’s a back support at the front desk for you to take.”

Jamie thinks he hears something pointed in the way Dr. Hadley says, extra gentle. What, like he doesn’t know how bad an injury can take you out? He’s in the Premier League for fuck’s sake. He knows how to deal with a strained muscle.

Dr. Hadley transfers your arm over to Jamie’s so smoothly that he barely understands what’s happening as she ushers you both out the door, thrusting a small foam roll into Jamie’s free hand.

“For lumbar support,” she says. “Won’t help much, but it’s better than nothing.”

Jamie’s pretty sure he’s said thanks as you climb in the car and then he’s in the drivers seat and it’s dead quiet.

“Right,” he says to the silence. “What the fuck.”

You’re picking at your nails something fierce. Jamie has to fight the urge to take your hand in his. A month of separation is not long enough for this shit.

“Can you just drive?” you ask in a broken voice. “I don’t want to be sitting for longer than I have to.”

There’s a new pitch in your voice, one Jamie’s never heard before, so he doesn’t argue. He doesn’t turn on the radio or a playlist or a podcast or anything, just drives in silence. He knows if it’s quiet long enough, you’ll talk.

He’s the opposite. He doesn’t need time to crack wide open, just a kind touch or a soft glance and he’s an open book. He was always shocked how early into your relationship you’d figured that out. A soft, “What’s on your mind, Jaim?” and he was unloading about whatever stress or fear he had.

He’s two minutes away from your flat when you break the silence. “I have gradual onset paralysis,” you say in a voice devoid of emotion. “‘Gradual onset’ means it happens over time. Paralysis means, well…paralysis.”

Jamie can hear what you’re saying and he understands it, but what catches him is the way you’re like nothing more than a hollow body. Not cracking a joke, not picking a fight. Just- empty.

Jamie says a long and drawn out “Fuuuckk,” because what else can you say? It’s not really his business to comfort you or to pry, except he’s the one the doctor called, so he allows himself one question.

“How did it happen?”

Last he knew, you were healthy as a horse.

“Two disks in my spine popped,” you reply, still in that same awful emotionless voice. “They’re not really sure how, could’ve been any number of things. Anyway, it got into my nerves. And my spinal cord. And it’s messing things up and it’s only going to get worse. The scans were to see if they could operate, because sometimes you can remove the shards. Or whatever it is. But I guess they can’t, because if they tried I’d definitely be paralyzed. So all I can do now is be in pain and wait for my legs to shut down.”

Jamie doesn’t know how to respond to any of that but he’s saved from thinking of an adequate response because he’s at your flat.

It was smart of you not to sell it when you’d moved in with Jamie. He wonders if you knew the breakup was inevitable.

He hops out and opens the door like a gentleman, offering his hand like he’s some Mr. Darcy-type shit, except you had both agreed that Roy was Mr. Darcy and he was Bingley. So it doesn’t fit at all except as soon as you’re done clutching his hand so you can get out without unnecessary pain, his hand flexes itself like he’s in that damn movie.

It wasn’t even a conscious choice, just a thing his hand decided to do, and he definitely thinks he’s going to have to talk to Ted about this. Or maybe Sam. Sam knows shit and is good at empathy. Maybe he’ll know what to say when your ex-girlfriend tells you she’s not going to walk ever again.

Jamie follows you to the door as you fiddle with the lock and push it open with a sigh. For a moment he doesn’t know if he should go inside, but it smells like honey and cinnamon because it’s the beginning of fall and he thinks that he should at least make sure you’ll be alright.

He notices you’re moving weird. All stiff, like. You’re trying to get an icepack out of the freezer but you can’t maneuver in a way that’s comfortable so Jamie grabs it and hands it to you.

You mumble, “Thanks,” and Jamie catches a glimpse of the perpetual glimmer in your eye.

“D’you need me to call someone?” he asks. “I can get Keeley down here. Or fucking… Ted. Or Colin.” He doesn’t say Sam, because he needs Sam. He can’t talk to Sam if he’s here with you.

You shake your head. Jamie wonders if it hurts to talk, but he remembers how much you hate the sound of your voice when you’re crying.

You take a slow, shallow breath to collect yourself. “I’m ok,” you finally say. “Not much anyone can do, and you’ve got training. I- I didn’t know they’d call you. I still have to switch your number with someone else. I’m probably going to ask Keeley since my family’s still far away.”

“Right,” Jamie says. Not much else to say. Except-

“You were seeing that bone doctor when we were together, and you didn’t fucking say anything?”

It’s accusatory and he knows it, but he can’t for the life of him say it kinder. Ted’s always on about communication and shit, and that is not communication.

You shuffle over to the couch and use it to help you lay face down in the floor. The icepack is precariously balanced on the small of your back.

“Didn’t know how to tell you,” comes your muffled voice. “Least, I figured out how to tell you too late. What was I gonna say, ‘Sorry I’ve been a complete bitch to you for four weeks, I’ve got shit floating around in my spine that makes me hurt so bad I want to die?’ Sounds fucking stupid.”

Jamie wants to say, Swear jar because it’s a long-standing joke, but he catches the words right before they reach the tip of his tongue.

“You could’ve said something,” he replies instead. “Chronic pain’s shit. It’s really shit and it makes you act like shit to the people you care about. It’s not an excuse, but it’s a reason.” As the words are coming out of his mouth, Jamie is reminded of a time when the roles were reversed, and you were giving him the “excuse versus reason,” speech.

You’d said, You’re dad’s an abusive prick, Jamie. Makes sense that you’d have a lot of negative emotions.

Fuck, if only you’d said something sooner. Maybe this would be something that you’d be cracking jokes about, or Jamie would be holding your hand, or he’d be laying right next to you as he runs his fingers through your hair.

But your muscles spasm so that thought gets banished as you bite on your forearm in an effort not to yell.

“Fucking hell,” Jamie says. “I don’t think you’re sorted on your own. I’m calling Ted.”

He walks to the other room so he can pretend he can’t hear your protests.

—

Ted leaves training to Roy, Beard, and Nate. What’s the point in having four coaches if one of ‘em can’t leave for family emergencies?

Sure, you’re not actually family, but that’s Ted for you. He doesn’t do casual friendships.

Jamie is out the door like a shot as soon as Ted knocks with a “Sorry, coach,” that Ted barely has a chance to wave off.

Ted doesn’t say much once he’s inside, just rambles on about training and Kansas and Henry. He’s clattering around in your kitchen and you can’t find it in yourself to care what he’s doing so you just keep laying on the floor, willing your back to stop hurting.

Finally, he comes over and sets down a smoothie in a short glass with a straw.

“It’s so you can drink it without moving,” he explains.

“I don’t think I can do this,” you say more to the couch legs than to Ted.

He sighs from where he’s crouched down next to you. “You don’t really have a choice, darlin’. You have to do this. The question is, are you gonna go through it alone?”

You shrug as best as you’re able.

“Wrong answer,” says Ted, standing up. “You’ve got a whole crew of people here who are gonna root for you and support you with whatever you need. All you got to do is ask, sweetheart.”

Ah, fuck, you’re crying again and Ted can definitely tell because your shoulders are shaking. He’s pretty sure you’d want to save face so he stands up and says, “Beard’s coming over after training. Says he wants to figure out how to modify your house for a wheelchair or something. Thought I’d make us all dinner so we’re not so hangry when he mentions taking an ax to anything.”

The mental image of Coach Beard chopping down your stairs is enough to make you smile a little through your tears.

—

Waiting is really shitty. Like, really shitty. Every day is the same thing: tingly legs, shooting pains, phantom cramps. The worst was when Dani and Richard were over and you stood up to get something from the fridge, and your legs decided at that moment to lose feeling. You panicked with your arms held out for balance as you swayed back and forth for a moment, willing your feet to fucking move. They did, but not before Dani and Richard were on you in a flash, ready to catch you if you fell.

“Well that was weird,” you joke in an effort to cut the tension. They laugh, but you still catch their worried glance.

“You do not have to put on a brave face for us,” Dani says. “If you want to joke, we will joke. But if you want to cry, we will cry too.”

“You can cry,” Richard says, “I will just pour more wine.”

You laugh. There’s been a steady stream of Greyhounds at your flat for the last week and a half. Everyone and their mother (quite literally) has come by to see you. Your own parents were coming in a week to stay indefinitely while you sorted things out.

You wonder if it’s easier to lose control of your legs slowly or all at once? On the one hand, you at least have notice. But on the other hand, the long, drawn-out waiting feels like slow torture. Every day you wake up from restless sleep and experimentally wiggle your toes. Every day, you check off one more box on your mental calendar as you count down to a date that doesn’t even properly exist.

The only person who hasn’t visited is Jamie. You don’t blame him, though. Keeley’s come round almost every single day and has been successfully switched to your emergency contact. She’s the one you’re calling as soon as you discover you can’t move.

You’re pretty sure it’s getting closer. Your legs fall asleep more frequently and things are all numb. It’s like you know you’re in pain, but it’s not quite registering with your nerves.

It fucking sucks.

—

You don’t believe in intuition like spirits and all that, but you believe in it in that your brain can pick up things that you couldn’t if you were actually trying.

That’s why you’re pretty sure this is it.

Walking is pretty much a no-go right now, so you stiff-leg yourself to the couch and sprawl out as comfortably as you can.

You call Keeley, and she’s over in no time.

“Hi babes,” she says as soon as she’s through the door, “Can I call Rebecca for girls’s night?”

“Sure,” you say, “Might as well live it up.”

Keeley replies, “Great! She’ll be here in ten minutes,” and you laugh, really actually laugh, because of course Keeley’s already called her.

Rebecca swoops in all smiles and no sympathy which is great because if one more person pushes their lower lip out at you, you’re going to scream. She’s brought drinks and Keeley’s pulling out snacks and you’re going to talk and giggle until you fall asleep, ready for what the morning has.

“Is Shandy making a move on that one player?” Rebecca asks Keeley from the couch.

“Nah,” Keeley calls back, “He said he wasn’t interested right now. Still hung up, I think.”

“What player?” you ask. You know what Shandy’s like, and you feel for the poor guy.

Rebecca and Keeley are silent before Keeley says, “You wouldn’t know him.”

“Bullshit,” you reply. “I know everyone on that team and I know you haven’t signed anyone new recently. Is it Colin?”

Rebecca shakes her head and gives Keeley a look. Keeley shrugs. “You’re the one who brought it up, babes.”

Rebecca turns to you. “It’s Jamie,” she says. “She’s been trying to bag him ever since Zava showed up.”

You shake your head. “She’s not right for him. He deserves someone better than that.”

Keeley’s back from the kitchen and scrutinizing your expression. “And what exactly do you mean by better?” she asks.

You laugh. “Oh no, not me. I wasn’t talking about me. No, I’m not- he needs someone different. Like, I don’t know, Roy’s sister, maybe? She’s great and a doctor to boot. Very caring too.”

“You’re caring,” Keeley says slowly, “And anyway, Molly doesn’t like him like that. They’re just friends.”

“Hang on, are you putting yourself in the same bracket as Shandy?” Rebecca interjects.

You shrug. “I was a complete bitch the last month we were together. There’s no excuse for it. I’m just surprised he lasted as long as he did.”

“You were in fucking pain!” Keeley exclaims. “You said you weren’t sleeping and everything fucking hurt and you couldn’t even think straight.”

You grab a handful of candy from a bowl. “Keels, I appreciate the sentiment, but I majorly fucked it. Like, there’s no going back. So he can date whoever he wants as long as it’s not fucking Shandy. Can we please, please move on?”

Rebecca’s eyes are narrowed but they both acquiesce. “Keeley, what about your love life? I’m sure it’s boring as usual.”

Keeley shrieks and smacks her with a pillow. “Fuck off,” she replies. “I’ll have you know it’s going very well…”

—

You were right. You wake up still on the couch tangled in Keeley’s arms, and the standard toe-wiggle just… doesn’t happen. It’s quiet, the early morning type, the kind where the sunlight isn’t so harsh and birds are chirping softly and all of Richmond hasn’t quite got up to begin their day.

As you look at your unmoving toes, the first thing you feel is a rush of relief. The waiting’s over, you think.

You look over to the wheelchair that’s been leaning patiently against the wall all this time. Here’s the first day of forever. You’re in no rush for it to start, so you let Keeley’s little snores and Rebecca’s heavy breathing lull you back to sleep.

—

It’s definitely a learning curve. And it’s frustrating. And if one more person catches you crying out of sheer rage, you’re going to start throwing things. But like Ted said, you don’t really have a choice.

Your mom said, “The only way out is through,” then grinned at the murderous glare you shot her way. She opened her phone and pulled up a picture of you, age three. “Same lovely expression as always,” she remarks cheerfully. That cracks your frown. You always were a funny kid.

It takes a while to figure out how to get places. Keeley (the absolute angel) volunteered, but she’s busy with the PR firm and quite frankly, a little too delicate to help you into a car. You made the mistake of saying this exactly one time and because subject to a rant about how she’s “not weak, just PETITE FOR FUCK’S SAKE!!”

Roy had punctuated her argument with a couple “That’s fucking right, babe"s all while rolling his eyes behind her back. It made you giggle.

The general consensus was that at any given reasonable hour (or unreasonable if you’re Richard or Bumbercatch) a Greyhound or coach would be able to get you where you’re needed. And today, that place is Nelson Road.

“How often does Jamie come visit?” Jan Maas asks, straightforward as ever.

“Um, never,” you reply. “We broke up, remember?”

“Right,” agrees Jan Maas. “We all know that, I just assumed you had gotten back together.”

You laugh. How absurd. “And why on earth would you assume that?”

“Because he talks about you all the time,” comes his prompt reply.

Huh. That’s interesting. You haven’t received so much as a single emoji from Jamie, but hadn’t thought a thing of it. But this, this is strange. This does not fit into your idea of how broken up people act.

“Weird,” you say. “Wonder what the fuck that’s about.”

Jan Maas shrugs and moves to lift you from the car.

—

It’s weird to be at Nelson Road, number one because it’s been FOREVER, number two because you’re eye-level with all sorts of things you’d never noticed before (ahem, part of the wall Roy kicked that no one cared to patch up), and number three because the last time you were here, it was as Jamie Tartt’s girlfriend.

Jan holds open the door as you roll in, ready to face whatever lies in wait.

It turns out whatever is a very excited Ted and Beard as well as a neutral Roy who present you a coaching jacket and a whistle.

“You’re coaching with us today because that little rat bastard Nate went to the dark side,” Beard says.

You remark, “Tell us how you really feel,” earning a snort from Roy and a chuckle from Trent Crimm.

“Oh yeah,” Ted says, “this is Trent. He’s writing a book.”

“Cool,” you say, “but you do know I know jack shit about coaching?”

Beard shrugs. “Neither do we. Worked out pretty well so far.” That earns another snort from Roy.

“Right,” you say. “Well, I guess I’m up for anything.”

“You mean ‘down,’” says Ted. “Oh I’m sorry, is it too soon?”

“Never,” you reply. “It’s never too soon to make trauma-related puns and this world, it’s either laugh or cry. So fuck it, I’m going to laugh.”

“Fuck yes,” grunts Roy before turning on his heel to yell at the team to GET THE FUCK ON THE PITCH YOU LITTLE PRICKS!

—

You don’t do much except sit there and watch as the coaches yell and point and run drills. It’s a chore to remind yourself not to check out Jamie’s butt as he runs by so you start thinking not yours, not yours, like a mental mantra.

He’s not looking at you so you won’t look at him and you’re sure it won’t be a problem because there are so many people to look at and talk to, except lunch rolls around (haha) and you sit at the head of a table and Jamie’s on the bench right next to you. So. There goes the no eye-contact plan.

You take exactly two bites of your sandwich before thinking fuck this and pushing yourself back so you can roll away. You can just take the elevator to see Becca.

You’ve made it a good way down the hall when you hear Jamie calling your name while saying, “Wait,” so you move a little faster.

But it’s still new and you’re painfully reminded that arms are not legs so he catches you with ease.

“The fuck are you running away for?” he asks, and you want to point out that technically, you weren’t running. Metaphorically though, he’d be right.

“I’m not running,” you reply. “I was just going to see Rebecca.”

“Bullshit,” he says. “I know you, and that was running. Is it because of me?”

“No,” you say, and you realize how much you’ve been looking up today. Your fucking neck needs a break so you rub it and look straight ahead, past Jamie at a life-size decal of O’Brien on the opposite wall.

“Why would I be running away from you? You’re not- I’m the shitty ex in this situation. I’m the one who fucked things up, Jamie, so… you don’t have to like, pretend that it’s your problem. I actually think it would be better if you were just mad and avoided me instead of whatever the hell is currently happening.”

Jamie rubs his jaw. He should be exasperated, he should, but instead the gears in his mind are turning. A few words stick out to him and then it’s like the final puzzle piece has clicked into place.

“Hang on,” he says slowly. “Hold the fuck up. Did you mess things up on purpose?”

The moment the words are out of his mouth he wants to take them back and apologize, because there’s no way they’re actually true, except you have a look on your face that can only be described as guilty.

“Fuuckkk,” Jamie breathes out and you hurriedly interject, “It wasn’t intentional! At least, not at first. It started because I was irritable because I hurt a lot, and then I convinced myself that I was faking it so I got mad at myself for being a little liar. And then I couldn’t sleep because I hurt so bad and everything was making me uncomfortable so I started snapping at you. I noticed it pretty quick so I figured I’d get the pain checked out and sorted because I didn’t think pulled muscles were supposed to last this long. And it turned out that it wasn’t a pulled muscle but some of my disks were all weird, and then one day in between physical therapy and the chiropractor, I fell on my back and jostled everything wrong and it fucking popped.”

Jamie thinks he knows exactly when that was. He remembers you saying something about falling while walking to your car after work and him asking if you needed ice. It was at the tail end of things, and he’d taken your stiffness figuratively as opposed to literally. Like, you were acting all cold because you hated him, not because you couldn’t move.

“So,” you continue, “I just leaned into it. I mean, Dr. Hadley was only one of my doctors, but she’s the one who told me I- you know, could end up like this. She said if things popped and it got into my spinal cord or fluid or whatever and they couldn’t get it out, it was only a matter of time before it messed everything up. They only way to stop it at that point would be to not move so either way, I end up stuck.”

You half-sob, half-laugh. “I didn’t know how to tell you and I could tell you were already annoyed with me so I just decided to let it happen. You’re better off without me, anyway. I hate asking for help and I hate when people give me empathetic looks or what-fucking-ever, and I was going to have to ask you for a lot of help. You don’t even fucking have time for that, Jamie.”

Jamie is at a loss for words, and you’ve run out of things to say.

You stare at each other in the hallway by the elevator, breathing heavily. You’ve both triggered each other’s fight-or-flight response, and it seems you’re both down for a fight.

“Right,” Jamie says finally, “ok, yeah, ok. You didn’t tell me because you didn’t want me to have to deal with this?”

You nod.

“Right,” he says again. “That’s fucked up.”

You don’t respond and he looks at you closely. “You know that’s fucked up, yeah?”

You shrug.

“Jesus, babe.” Jamie runs his hands through his hair. He’s going to have to fix his headbands. “Alright,” he says yet again, “look. Dr. Sharon and me- we talk. And, you’re supposed to be able to talk to people about shit like this. Like, me playing football isn’t supposed to mean I don’t have time for the people I love. And if you’re feeling that way or if you’re hurting, you have to tell me so I don’t think you’re being all pissed off because you hate me. That’s the whole point of love, babe. You take care of each other’s shit.”

“Jamie, I can’t get places easily anymore. I can’t drive and I can’t go up steps. I will never be able to storm the pitch to kiss you or walk with you in Brazil. I get mad really easily because everything’s so fucking frustrating and I just want to punch something.” You shake your head. “You don’t deserve any of that. You need someone who can be there for you and isn’t a total pill to be around.”

“Are you fucking trying to push me away?” he asks.

“Yes!” you exclaim. “Obviously!”

“Well fucking don’t. You almost had me the first time, but good luck getting rid of me now.”

“Fine!”

“For fuck’s sake, just kiss,” groans Will, walking by with an armful of laundry.

“Fuck off, William!” you both say in unison and then Jamie’s on one knee, eye-level with you and brushing a thumb across your chin.

“Fucking hell, love,” he breathes. “You have to remember that you can talk to me, yeah? Just promise you’ll remember.”

You nod, unable to speak.

“Good,” he says. “We’re giving this another go. And if you can’t kiss me on the pitch, might as well do it here, yeah?”

#jamie tartt x reader #jamie tartt fanfiction #jamie tartt imagine #jamie tartt x y/n #jamie tartt x you #jamie tartt #ted lasso

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