#so i have to get up to feed them except on weekends when my dad pours them A FULL BOWL EACH!

[horce-divorce]

amazing how some animals are so misunderstood and display altruistic behavior, like rats giving up food to help a friend... meanwhile these fucking cats are over here ganging up on one of their own and refusing to let her use the litter box bc they don't wanna fucking share 🙄

[samgirl98]

Mending a Family 9/?

Prev | Next

Dick knows I know about you. Don’t worry, your secret is safe with me, but I don’t think they’ll ever give up.

Jason put away his phone; he would think about that later. Right now, he wanted to give Jazz all his attention and know what happened to make Danny a cute five-year-old.

“I don’t know how much you know about Danny’s and mine biological parents,” she trailed off while rocking Ellie.

“I heard enough,” Jason answered while Danny said, “Almost everything. Except how I got de-aged ‘cuz even I don’t know or the few days leading up to that.”

Jazz nodded, “good, that’ll make things easier.”

Jazz put a now asleep Ellie on the rocker and looked at Jason and Danny. They were sitting in their new living room. Jason had chosen a little house with the closest neighbor two miles away. They were still in the woods but twenty minutes from a little town with schools, a library, and a general store. Would it be easier to disappear in a city? Maybe. But Danny wouldn’t be able to use his powers as well in the city.

Plus, it’d be easier to avoid Oracle, too.

“Mom and dad were supposed to be out of the house that weekend. They were going to test a new invention. The Fenton Demoleculizer. It was supposed to tear ghosts apart ‘molecule by molecule,’ as they liked to say. It didn’t work that way.”

“Things rarely do,” Danny chirped.

Jazz sighed.

“Ellie had come that weekend to visit. They both took down a ghost and returned them to the Ghost Zone.”

“Stupid Skulker,” Danny added.

“Mom and dad caught them both transforming. They didn’t hesitate; they shot Danny first. Thankfully, I had come down the basement when mom shot Danny. If it had been dad, well, let’s say he’s a horrible shot. Thankfully, the Demoleculizer didn’t work how it was supposed to and only de-aged Danny.”

Jazz sighed and rubbed her eye.

“I was able to get Danny and throw him through the portal, which is how I assume he ended up with you. Mom and dad were furious and thought I was overshadowed. They were ranting about how they didn’t notice their baby boy was dead and were tricked by a filthy ghost. There was no talking to them.”

“In the chaos, Ellie got hit with the Demoleculizer, too. I knew there was no going back at that point, so I got her and went through the portal. Those few minutes must’ve been days here, though, because, well, you know, we didn’t land at the same place or time that Danny had.”

Silence reigned as they all digested what Jazz had said. Jason couldn’t believe any parent would turn against their child that way.

But then again, Sheila did the same to me, he thought.

“So now what,” Jazz asked, “we can’t mooch off you forever, Jason. As much as I appreciate what you’ve done, it isn’t fair that you have to feed three extra mouths now and leave your old haunt for Danny.”

“Whoa, hey, it’s no trouble to me at all. Besides, I already think of Danny as my kid, and parents are there to care for their kids.”

Jason took a deep breath, “Besides, I wasn’t in a good place before Danny. I won’t lie to you guys; I’m not a good guy. I’ve—I’ve killed before; I’ve hurt my family. If anything, I would understand if you guys don’t want to be around me.”

“When you said you’ve killed, have you ever killed innocent people or…?” Jazz left the question hanging.

Jason shook his head and told his story of how he had been killed and returned to life. The Lazarus Pit and League of Assassins were hard to get through, but Danny and Jazz deserved the truth. He told them about his return to Gotham and how he set up a criminal empire. (One that he abandoned for Danny.) He mentioned Titan Towers and his so-called revenge against Tim. He told them all his sins.

Jason turned to Danny, “Do you understand now, Danny-lad, I deserve their anger.”

Danny got up and hugged Jason tight, “You came back angry. It’s not your fault, either.”

“While I’m not too glad to hear about the killings, I understand why you did it. Besides, you’ve left that behind, and you’re taking care of Danny. I’m not here to judge but to take care of my baby brother and sister. And you, Jason, have taken in Danny and protected him. Not many people would do that. So, for that, I thank you.”

Jason almost felt like crying. The Fentons didn’t judge him, and they didn’t refuse to give him their love and forgiveness. Jason felt like he belonged to a family for the first time in a long time.

“Now, it’s time we redecorated. Isn’t that right, big brother?” Jazz asked with a smile.

____

Tim had been able to follow the cold anomaly north. It had disappeared somewhere in Vermont.

“What do you think it is,” Tim asked Barbara.

“I don’t know, but do you think it’s related to Jason disappearing?”

“It’s too much of a coincidence for it not to be.”

“Hmm,” Barbara hummed, “I’m going to set it up for the program to look for this anomaly in Canada. It has disappeared in the continental US; Canada is the only logical conclusion.”

“Should I tell Bruce?”

Barbara sighed, “Let’s give it a few more days and see if anything new comes up. If it doesn’t, we will have to tell him about it, but let him come up with his conclusions. If anything new shows up and leads to Jason, I suggest we observe him first instead of getting the whole family descending on him.”

“What, why?” Tim asked incredulously.

There was silence on the other side.

“Why, Barbara?”

“Tim, Jason left for a reason. There are no signs of struggles, and he took everything he had; he doesn’t want to be found by us. Shouldn’t we honor his wishes?”

“But everyone misses him. Bruce is going crazy looking for him.”

“I love Bruce, but he’s a hypocrite. He ignored Jason when he was right next door, and now that he’s gone, he wants him back. It sounds like he just wants some control, like usual,” Barbara said angrily.

“But Dick is also,” Barbara interrupted him.

“Dick isn’t much better. Look, I love everyone, but how we’ve treated Jason,” she sighed. “If he’s just living his life and not killing people, then I see no reason to make him miserable.”

“If that’s how you feel, why are you helping me look for him?” Tim couldn’t help but ask.

“Because I’m a hypocrite, too.”

Then she hung up.

Dick knows I know about you. Don’t worry, your secret is safe with me, but I don’t think they’ll ever give up.

Jason put away his phone; he would think about that later. Right now, he wanted to give Jazz all his attention and know what happened to make Danny a cute five-year-old.

“I don’t know how much you know about Danny’s and mine biological parents,” she trailed off while rocking Ellie.

“I heard enough,” Jason answered while Danny said, “Almost everything. Except how I got de-aged ‘cuz even I don’t know or the few days leading up to that.”

Jazz nodded, “good, that’ll make things easier.”

Jazz put a now asleep Ellie on the rocker and looked at Jason and Danny. They were sitting in their new living room. Jason had chosen a little house with the closest neighbor two miles away. They were still in the woods but twenty minutes from a little town with schools, a library, and a general store. Would it be easier to disappear in a city? Maybe. But Danny wouldn’t be able to use his powers as well in the city.

Plus, it’d be easier to avoid Oracle, too.

“Mom and dad were supposed to be out of the house that weekend. They were going to test a new invention. The Fenton Demoleculizer. It was supposed to tear ghosts apart ‘molecule by molecule,’ as they liked to say. It didn’t work that way.”

“Things rarely do,” Danny chirped.

Jazz sighed.

“Ellie had come that weekend to visit. They both took down a ghost and returned them to the Ghost Zone.”

“Stupid Skulker,” Danny added.

“Mom and dad caught them both transforming. They didn’t hesitate; they shot Danny first. Thankfully, I had come down the basement when mom shot Danny. If it had been dad, well, let’s say he’s a horrible shot. Thankfully, the Demoleculizer didn’t work how it was supposed to and only de-aged Danny.”

Jazz sighed and rubbed her eye.

“I was able to get Danny and throw him through the portal, which is how I assume he ended up with you. Mom and dad were furious and thought I was overshadowed. They were ranting about how they didn’t notice their baby boy was dead and were tricked by a filthy ghost. There was no talking to them.”

“In the chaos, Ellie got hit with the Demoleculizer, too. I knew there was no going back at that point, so I got her and went through the portal. Those few minutes must’ve been days here, though, because, well, you know, we didn’t land at the same place or time that Danny had.”

Silence reigned as they all digested what Jazz had said. Jason couldn’t believe any parent would turn against their child that way.

But then again, Sheila did the same to me, he thought.

“So now what,” Jazz asked, “we can’t mooch off you forever, Jason. As much as I appreciate what you’ve done, it isn’t fair that you have to feed three extra mouths now and leave your old haunt for Danny.”

“Whoa, hey, it’s no trouble to me at all. Besides, I already think of Danny as my kid, and parents are there to care for their kids.”

Jason took a deep breath, “Besides, I wasn’t in a good place before Danny. I won’t lie to you guys; I’m not a good guy. I’ve—I’ve killed before; I’ve hurt my family. If anything, I would understand if you guys don’t want to be around me.”

“When you said you’ve killed, have you ever killed innocent people or…?” Jazz left the question hanging.

Jason shook his head and told his story of how he had been killed and returned to life. The Lazarus Pit and League of Assassins were hard to get through, but Danny and Jazz deserved the truth. He told them about his return to Gotham and how he set up a criminal empire. (One that he abandoned for Danny.) He mentioned Titan Towers and his so-called revenge against Tim. He told them all his sins.

Jason turned to Danny, “Do you understand now, Danny-lad, I deserve their anger.”

Danny got up and hugged Jason tight, “You came back angry. It’s not your fault, either.”

“While I’m not too glad to hear about the killings, I understand why you did it. Besides, you’ve left that behind, and you’re taking care of Danny. I’m not here to judge but to take care of my baby brother and sister. And you, Jason, have taken in Danny and protected him. Not many people would do that. So, for that, I thank you.”

Jason almost felt like crying. The Fentons didn’t judge him, and they didn’t refuse to give him their love and forgiveness. Jason felt like he belonged to a family for the first time in a long time.

“Now, it’s time we redecorated. Isn’t that right, big brother?” Jazz asked with a smile.

____

Tim had been able to follow the cold anomaly north. It had disappeared somewhere in Vermont.

“What do you think it is,” Tim asked Barbara.

“I don’t know, but do you think it’s related to Jason disappearing?”

“It’s too much of a coincidence for it not to be.”

“Hmm,” Barbara hummed, “I’m going to set it up for the program to look for this anomaly in Canada. It has disappeared in the continental US; Canada is the only logical conclusion.”

“Should I tell Bruce?”

Barbara sighed, “Let’s give it a few more days and see if anything new comes up. If it doesn’t, we will have to tell him about it, but let him come up with his conclusions. If anything new shows up and leads to Jason, I suggest we observe him first instead of getting the whole family descending on him.”

“What, why?” Tim asked incredulously.

There was silence on the other side.

“Why, Barbara?”

“Tim, Jason left for a reason. There are no signs of struggles, and he took everything he had; he doesn’t want to be found by us. Shouldn’t we honor his wishes?”

“But everyone misses him. Bruce is going crazy looking for him.”

“I love Bruce, but he’s a hypocrite. He ignored Jason when he was right next door, and now that he’s gone, he wants him back. It sounds like he just wants some control, like usual,” Barbara said angrily.

“But Dick is also,” Barbara interrupted him.

“Dick isn’t much better. Look, I love everyone, but how we’ve treated Jason,” she sighed. “If he’s just living his life and not killing people, then I see no reason to make him miserable.”

“If that’s how you feel, why are you helping me look for him?” Tim couldn’t help but ask.

“Because I’m a hypocrite, too.”

Then she hung up.

Dick knows I know about you. Don’t worry, your secret is safe with me, but I don’t think they’ll ever give up.

Jason put away his phone; he would think about that later. Right now, he wanted to give Jazz all his attention and know what happened to make Danny a cute five-year-old.

“I don’t know how much you know about Danny’s and mine biological parents,” she trailed off while rocking Ellie.

“I heard enough,” Jason answered while Danny said, “Almost everything. Except how I got de-aged ‘cuz even I don’t know or the few days leading up to that.”

Jazz nodded, “good, that’ll make things easier.”

Jazz put a now asleep Ellie on the rocker and looked at Jason and Danny. They were sitting in their new living room. Jason had chosen a little house with the closest neighbor two miles away. They were still in the woods but twenty minutes from a little town with schools, a library, and a general store. Would it be easier to disappear in a city? Maybe. But Danny wouldn’t be able to use his powers as well in the city.

Plus, it’d be easier to avoid Oracle, too.

“Mom and dad were supposed to be out of the house that weekend. They were going to test a new invention. The Fenton Demoleculizer. It was supposed to tear ghosts apart ‘molecule by molecule,’ as they liked to say. It didn’t work that way.”

“Things rarely do,” Danny chirped.

Jazz sighed.

“Ellie had come that weekend to visit. They both took down a ghost and returned them to the Ghost Zone.”

“Stupid Skulker,” Danny added.

“Mom and dad caught them both transforming. They didn’t hesitate; they shot Danny first. Thankfully, I had come down the basement when mom shot Danny. If it had been dad, well, let’s say he’s a horrible shot. Thankfully, the Demoleculizer didn’t work how it was supposed to and only de-aged Danny.”

Jazz sighed and rubbed her eye.

“I was able to get Danny and throw him through the portal, which is how I assume he ended up with you. Mom and dad were furious and thought I was overshadowed. They were ranting about how they didn’t notice their baby boy was dead and were tricked by a filthy ghost. There was no talking to them.”

“In the chaos, Ellie got hit with the Demoleculizer, too. I knew there was no going back at that point, so I got her and went through the portal. Those few minutes must’ve been days here, though, because, well, you know, we didn’t land at the same place or time that Danny had.”

Silence reigned as they all digested what Jazz had said. Jason couldn’t believe any parent would turn against their child that way.

But then again, Sheila did the same to me, he thought.

“So now what,” Jazz asked, “we can’t mooch off you forever, Jason. As much as I appreciate what you’ve done, it isn’t fair that you have to feed three extra mouths now and leave your old haunt for Danny.”

“Whoa, hey, it’s no trouble to me at all. Besides, I already think of Danny as my kid, and parents are there to care for their kids.”

Jason took a deep breath, “Besides, I wasn’t in a good place before Danny. I won’t lie to you guys; I’m not a good guy. I’ve—I’ve killed before; I’ve hurt my family. If anything, I would understand if you guys don’t want to be around me.”

“When you said you’ve killed, have you ever killed innocent people or…?” Jazz left the question hanging.

Jason shook his head and told his story of how he had been killed and returned to life. The Lazarus Pit and League of Assassins were hard to get through, but Danny and Jazz deserved the truth. He told them about his return to Gotham and how he set up a criminal empire. (One that he abandoned for Danny.) He mentioned Titan Towers and his so-called revenge against Tim. He told them all his sins.

Jason turned to Danny, “Do you understand now, Danny-lad, I deserve their anger.”

Danny got up and hugged Jason tight, “You came back angry. It’s not your fault, either.”

“While I’m not too glad to hear about the killings, I understand why you did it. Besides, you’ve left that behind, and you’re taking care of Danny. I’m not here to judge but to take care of my baby brother and sister. And you, Jason, have taken in Danny and protected him. Not many people would do that. So, for that, I thank you.”

Jason almost felt like crying. The Fentons didn’t judge him, and they didn’t refuse to give him their love and forgiveness. Jason felt like he belonged to a family for the first time in a long time.

“Now, it’s time we redecorated. Isn’t that right, big brother?” Jazz asked with a smile.

____

Tim had been able to follow the cold anomaly north. It had disappeared somewhere in Vermont.

“What do you think it is,” Tim asked Barbara.

“I don’t know, but do you think it’s related to Jason disappearing?”

“It’s too much of a coincidence for it not to be.”

“Hmm,” Barbara hummed, “I’m going to set it up for the program to look for this anomaly in Canada. It has disappeared in the continental US; Canada is the only logical conclusion.”

“Should I tell Bruce?”

Barbara sighed, “Let’s give it a few more days and see if anything new comes up. If it doesn’t, we will have to tell him about it, but let him come up with his conclusions. If anything new shows up and leads to Jason, I suggest we observe him first instead of getting the whole family descending on him.”

“What, why?” Tim asked incredulously.

There was silence on the other side.

“Why, Barbara?”

“Tim, Jason left for a reason. There are no signs of struggles, and he took everything he had; he doesn’t want to be found by us. Shouldn’t we honor his wishes?”

“But everyone misses him. Bruce is going crazy looking for him.”

“I love Bruce, but he’s a hypocrite. He ignored Jason when he was right next door, and now that he’s gone, he wants him back. It sounds like he just wants some control, like usual,” Barbara said angrily.

“But Dick is also,” Barbara interrupted him.

“Dick isn’t much better. Look, I love everyone, but how we’ve treated Jason,” she sighed. “If he’s just living his life and not killing people, then I see no reason to make him miserable.”

“If that’s how you feel, why are you helping me look for him?” Tim couldn’t help but ask.

“Because I’m a hypocrite, too.”

Then she hung up.

So I don't know yet if I'm going to make that Barbara would help Jason from time to time and actually talked to him (kind of like how she helped him during the Cheers story line) or if she should also be one of the ones who ignored Jason. I'll think it through.

@idontgetpaidenoughforthisshit @skulld3mort-1fan @theauthorandtheartist @emergentpanda-blog @jaggedheart11 @fisticuffsatapplebees @booberrylizard @fantasticbluebirdfan @thegatorsgooseoose @cyrwrites @kjoboo91 @crystallicedart @amaramizuki666 @spekulatiusmuffin @meira-3919 @kilasmess @bubblemixer @lexdamo @wonderland-daisy @mj-arts-n-stuff @amyheart19 @dolfay @the-church-grimm @undead-essence @aph-mable @lizisipancardo @purrloin77 @writer-extraodinaire @charlietheepic7 @sinfulloccultist @nootherusernameworked @coruscateselene @chaoticchange @itsberrydreemurstuff @gmkelz11 @feral-bunny31 @paroovian @thatonegaybitch68 @d4ydr34min9 @overtherose @fandomwandererer @vipower001 @thordottir45 @blackrabbitt3t @rosecinnamonbun @bianca-hooks123 @epilepticnerd @dat1angel @consouling @flamingenchiladadragon

[antisociallilbrat]

Wisdom Teeth Poly Losers HCs

I got my wisdom teeth out recently and :)) I am in so much pain bc what was suppose to be a simple surgery turned into fuck shit bc ofc I had to have complicated teeth :))) my bottom teeth were on my nerve line and the dentist didn't realize this until they were pulling my bottom teeth out- I was awake too, just numb :) anyways enjoy some headcannons for what I think would happen with the Losers getting their wisdom teeth out

So this is set in my Poly losers universe and when they're young adults most of the losers have to get their wisdom teeth removed

The exceptions are Richie because his dad was a dentist so he had them removed in high school and also Eddie because of his mom

Eddie didn't even need his removed but of course his mom had them done anyways :/ I think also because of her he had them removed first, a year or so before Richie

This leaves Mike, Stan, Bev, Ben, and Bill who needs to get their removed

What prompts this is Bill, who a tooth ache and refused to go the dentist. Due to his parent's neglect he never really went to the dentist so he doesn't see why he has to go now

It takes Eddie threatening to forcefully drag Bill there himself for him to finally go

And yes Eddie goes with Bill and yes Eddie holds his hand during the appointment because Bill won't admit it but he's a little scared of those tools

Turns out one of Bill's wisdom teeth are infected and need to removed asap

So when they get home to discuss scheduling Bill's surgery with the others, Bill's worried and Mike being Mike graciously mentions how he still needs to get his removed to agrees to do it with Bill

This gives Stan the idea that- Hey they're starting to have a bit of extra income, might as well go get everyone else's done too

They're going to have Mike and Bill go first and then the next weekend Bev and Ben and THEN Stan will go

There's no reason he decided he would go last

Any who Bill and Mike's surgery happens and Bill is the BIGGEST BABY who clings to Mike the moment they get in the car

They're both drugged up and Mike goes to kiss Bill bc 'oh no his baby' and poor Ben has to get into the back between Mike and Bill to keep them from accidently hurting themselves

Bill and Mike just both end up clinging to Ben and the moment they get home won't let Ben leave them

They both proceed to pass out on Ben on the couch

Ben doesn't mind

Also I love the idea of Richie spoon feeding Mike and Bill with mocking pouty faces and going like 'Oooo does Billy Willy and Mikey Wikey hurt?'

Mike laughs (the best that he can) at Richie and Bill throws a pillow at him

He misses

Otherwise Mike and Bill heal up with little complications- Thanks to Stan and Eddie, and neither of them mind eating junk food like smoothing and apple sauce for a couple days

Oh also Bill ended having to braces a couple weeks after his surgery because he never got them in his teens and turns out he needed them- he's very upset about it

You can take the headcannon of young adult Bill with braces from my cold dead fists

The next weekend it's Ben and Bev's turn

Knowing what happened with Bill and Mike, after the surgery Bev and Ben ride home in separate cars

Richie rides in the back with Bev in the car she's in and drugged up Bev is OBSESSED with Richie's hair

Like she can't stop herself from running her hand through it and tugging on the curls

Richie finds this hilarious

Meanwhile Ben gets nauseous from the pain medicine :( bb is not having a good time and rides with his head in Bill's lap

But it turns out Ben probably has the easiest recovery of them all bc the next day he feels completely fine and can act like normal- aside from his mushy diet but he was already a big smoothie guy anyways

Poor Bev suffers

She's a texture person when it comes to food and Stan and Eddie has to fight to keep her from eating the wrong things bc she keeps trying to rush the healing process

The next week is worst than the actual surgery for her

The moment she gets the okay she can eat like normal though, all the Losers work together to cook her her favorite meal

And by all the Losers I mean Ben and Mike while the others help

Also she had to quit smoking during her heal week and that was absolute hell so she was very grouchy

Everyone- even Eddie- was happy when she got to light up again

Then it's Stan's turn for him to get his teeth out

He's very calm and composed and he trusts Eddie to take care of him since its Eddie and he's been helping Stan take care of the others

Turns out Stan's teeth are impacted which means a big ouch

But he's Stan and he'll be damned with unnecessary teeth are going to break him

He actually manages to sleep the whole way back and barely wakes up when Eddie changes his gauze- he goes back to sleep and sleeps till the next day

And then the next day he is in absolute pain and its like the pain meds aren't even working

He won't tell the Losers but they know. They all stick close by, particularly Richie and Bill since they both don't have day jobs

They know Stan is in pain because he actually allows the two dufoses to cuddle him in his bed- and he's usually not a cuddly guy

If one of them have to get up there's a Loser ready to replace them

Mike makes sure the mushy food Stan eats is till kosher <3

Stan very much loves his Losers bc he didn't have to say how much pain he was in, they just knew

Okay that's all, yes I know there's spelling/grammar errors. I'm in pain and on pain pills, whadda want from me?

[liaromancewriter]

Did your pairing watch the Super Bowl? If yes, is it like a big thing for them? Are they fans of a certain team or did they watch just to be with friends and/or for the HT show?

I meant to reply to this after Super Bowl Sunday, but it slipped my mind.

Cassie and Ethan are not football fans per se. But if the New England Patriots had made the play-offs and the Super Bowl as a result, they would have watched to show their Boston pride.

Ethan grew up around football because of Alan and his dad's friends who would meet at their house to watch a game together. But Ethan's never been one to enjoy football or root for any particular team. (Unlike this Author who roots for the Patriots every year even when we miss the play-offs 3 seasons in a row.)

Cassie only watched the game because Max did, but otherwise she prefers basketball and tennis. She does enjoy the half-time show though, so if a favorite singer is performing she'll make sure to watch that.

Max tries to catch games on TV or live in person when he can. He's always been a supporter of Washington DC home teams even if they suck; New York teams are second. He and Sienna will often go to home games together; they might take friends with them too and make a party out of it.

Before Max, Sienna never gave football much thought except her cousins are huge Saints' supporters. So, she was exposed to sports growing up. But it's like her reaction to baseball (bk1, ch5) where it's more about enjoying the atmosphere than understanding the game.

Max & Sienna didn't watch the Super Bowl this year as they were in New York City for a weekend getaway. But in future years, they will host epic Super Bowl game day parties at their condo. They have a large entertaining space indoor and outdoor, so it works out no matter how big the crowd.

Sienna is lucky that she married a man who loves to entertain and feed others as much as she does. They love having a reason to host their friends: cookouts in the summers, Oscar parties, Mystery Dinners with costumes, NYE, just-because get togethers, etc.

Tags under the cut

Character Asks: @annfg8 @bluebelle08 @cariantha @crazy-loca-blog @coffeeheartaddict2 @doriopenheart @lucy-268 @jerzwriter @lady-calypso @mrs-ramsey @queencarb @quixoticdreamer16 @rookiemartin @tessa-liam @trappedinfanfiction

[amnotaqueen]

Stuck At Home With Narc All Day

It rained all day so I had to endure being in the presence of my NARC husband the entire day. He does everything as if no one is around him and no one else has preferences or needs besides him. He plays music and videos on his phone loudly as if there is no one else in the house trying to read or listen to anything else. He sings along to his music loudly because he doesn't care if he is disturbing anyone else in the house. I and my son don't matter.

Who waits until close to 10 pm to start drilling a special needs 7 year old with autism, intellectual disability, and probable ADHD about Bible trivia and hits the kid with a switch for not answering correctly? I and my son are falling short of his too high expectations and we are getting punished for it. My son was yawning as his dad made him sit and watch a video about Noah. It was a kids video, animated with slow moving drawn pictures instead of the fast paced cartoon animated videos. And the pictures were accompanied by the voice of a narrator.

Our son does not focus well or retain information well in general. When it is late and past his bedtime and he is obviously tired, he focuses even less. And when his dad is angrily demanding that he answer correctly or get hit with a switch and get screamed at, he can barely focus at all. So, my husband's method of what he calls 'discipline' was causing our son to become more and more flustered and panicked and actually distracting him from focusing to answer correctly and set him up to fail so that the cycle of getting hit and screamed at would not end.

He had all day to study about Noah with our son. He could have done this earlier in the day when our son was more alert, but he chose to nap earlier in the day. I and my son did not nap. So by 10 pm, our son was naturally tired as he usually goes to bed around 8pm during the week and 9pm on weekends. Why choose the time of day when your child is most tired, least likely to focus to make them study and demonstrate proficiency in the subject matter and punish them when they can't do it? Because you are a narc and you don't have good sense and no decency.

The only thing my husband pays attention to is what is on my plate or my son's plate or his own plate. What is going into his mouth is what he is about. He is looking at what is going into our mouths because he sees what we are eating as food that he cannot eat. I prepare meals and sometimes I freeze food to have as leftover meals during the weekend when I like to rest more from cooking. So today, I warmed up some Nigerian soup my husband had made a while ago and gave it to our son for dinner.

The way he acted when his big eyes were peering at my son's dinner... The way he said, "That's my soup! Where were you hiding my soup? I thought it was all gone. " Sounding like a big, selfish child. I told him I froze the soup because I meal prep. I told him no one hid his soup, and that his soup was all go except for this small amount I had set aside for another day to feed our son. He said, "I know. I'm just kidding." But I'm pretty sure he was not kidding. If he had known the soup was there, he would have eaten it even though I had set it aside for our son. Now, I'm afraid he will start eating the food I put in the freezer for our son to eat on weekends. He is selfish and everything is about his own belly.

I have not heard from CPS besides when I reached out to them on Wednesday evening because they said they would get back to us on Monday. Well, Monday, Tuesday, and Wednesday passed without hearing from them. He said their recommendations are that we get counseling and get our son diagnosed. He asked if we agree to do that. I told him that I am willing but my husband may not be and would have to let them know. I asked if they were done with us if my husband said no to their recommendations. He said he would get back to me ASAP. I have not heard back. It's very discouraging when you reach out for help to avoid a tragedy and it seems like your issues are unimportant, overlooked, trivialized, and no one can be a good support for you.

I know counseling for us, like, for our marriage, is pointless. He is not going to change. Would be a real miracle if he changed, but it's that type of overly hopeful, delusional thinking that got me and my son stuck with an abusive narc in the first place. And getting more diagnoses is not going to help. He already has diagnoses: autism and intellectual disability. My husband disregards those diagnoses and just wants to spank, hit, yell, and punish all the time. Is getting another diagnosis going to make my husband realize that he shouldn't slap our son in the face? These diagnoses are irrelevant to my narc husband.

[ambroseandmox]

Personal stuff under the cut.

So February is always a bad month. Anniversary of some deaths and my dad going to jail; weather here is typically cold and the days are short so I struggle. But March picked up, things were OK, and suddenly I got a new hyperfixation.

That usually happens when my brain goes bad.

Anyway, the Batman hyperfixation kicked in (I've been reading batman off and on my whole life, but I haven't collected comics since I stopped working at a bookstore) and I started getting anxiety attacks. All the time. Work, home. Didn't matter. Some fanfic descriptions also trigger it but I have no idea why. (There’s a Jason Todd-centric one called Something in the Static, I think, which is a non-Robin Jason Lives AU, sounds fantastic, I have it open in a tab,and As soon as I look at it I start shaking. No fucking clue.) I was thinking maybe this is trauma from growing up in a home with an emotionally and verbally abusive dad leaking out by proxy, but if I haven't read the story yet, how come it's hitting like that? Either way, trust me to have an awful, uncontrollable hyperfixation that also presses on all my sharp edges until my psyche bleeds. Very on brand.

Another sign of bad brain is that I started getting fanfic ideas and also the urge to actually write. I haven't written a fic in over 5 years. And I've never written more than 9,000 words.

Except my current story is well over 30K words in only a couple weeks.

I've had some periods of gender dysphoria in the past, but it's been over 5 years since the last bout of really distressing feelings. And they're back now. And more insistent than ever. I've started buying some clothing to try and alleviate it. I also have body dysmorphia, and that's a longstanding issue, and they're feeding into each other. If I wasn't convinced I'd look fatter, I would be booking a haircut for the weekend because I can't look at myself any more. Not that I ever really did, but even reflections in elevators are uncomfortable.

I used fitbit so I can see where the endless anxiety kicked in (April 4). My resting heart rate has spiked up by 7 points and my sleep has dropped to under 4 hours a night. I'm struggling to eat, let alone eat healthily.

I have rolling anxiety attacks all day long, but I can breathe through them. But the only thing I want to do is read fanfic and scroll tumblr, so I've been doing that while on the clock at work and I can't stop. Very fucking poor coping mechanisms that will come back to bite me in the ass and I know it and I can't stop. It does help with the anxiety because the brain shuts off whatever is churning in it. I've tried listening to music and it makes it worse. Podcasts actually seem to work the way a tumblr scroll does but then I risk typing what im hearing and that's also not great.

Anyway, I'm an absolute hot mess right now. I don't have anyone I can vent to about this in real life so I'm putting it here. I have an appointment with my counselor tomorrow night, and I think im going to talk about the gender stuff... I feel like that's probably what's percolating the most because it's the least safe topic for me to talk about. But that's also terrifying for me.

Im married to someone who I've never discussed these feelings with. I've never said the words out loud. And it's beyond scary to contemplate. I don't know what I'm going to do.

[deadpool-scar-bro]

i supposed i had to talk about this bullshit sometime so i could leave it behind i guess so here i go

so im gonna talk about my experience being hospitalized.

april was hell for me. i started having my period which was like normal at first but then day by day the amount of blood that was coming out was just too much. i tried medication (depoprovera) to stop the bleeding and it worked for a while but the bleeding came back again and again. the bleeding continued for the whole month and then some.

when i went to see my ginecologist she did an ultrasound and discovered that the endometrium in my uterus was way too fucking thick. like 30 mm. and that was what was causing the bleeding.

she gave me some more medication and told me that if it didn't stop the bleeding i would have to go to the hospital for blood transfusions and whatnot. she recommended me another ginecologist who worked at a hospital who would take care of me and keep her posted while i stayed there.

i was hospitalized in april for 1 night and then i left the next day. the experience was miserable and horrible except for the fact that i met two older women who were in the same room as me and they were very kind and distracted me from everything by talking with me. the doctor gave me a medication that seemingly stopped the bleeding for that weekend.

and because i'm a fucking idiot i was like "oh i'm better now, i should go to work or smth 'cause i can't keep missing days! i'll get fired!"

needless to say, this was a really stupid decision. that same monday the bleeding came back with a vengeance and continued on through the week despite the fact that i kept taking the medication.

i still showed up for work because i really didn't want to keep missing days. i was truly miserable.

the next week was even worse. i couldn't move at all. i didn't go to work. i saw my doctor again and she gave me another medication that only made me bleed more because she knew that getting rid of the endometrium would stop it. but i was already too weak by that point.

she had me do bloodwork on the next day to see my hemogoblin levels and what my bloodtype was since i couldn't say for sure

that day was like... fucking surreal fr. in the morning i was so weak but i still tried my best to be kind to the nurse who took my blood samples in a lab near my house. they told me by the afternoon i would have my test results back and they would send them to me by e-mail.

i couldn't stand for long and i couldn't walk without feeling extreme pain but someone still had to feed the dogs and the cat, and i was home alone the whole day since my family was at work. when i went outside the light hurt my eyes and i had to wear sunglasses even inside the house 'cause looking at my phone screen was painful.

i was sitting in the dark for the majority of the day and it was still too bright for me.

i ordered food 'cause i couldn't cook for myself and then i tried my best to just survive the day. i already knew my hemogoblin levels were pretty dang low even without the test results, and i knew i would need a blood transfusion. tho i was still holding on to hope that i wouldn't have to get hospitalized again (although a little voice in my head told me that i couldn't be that stupid and that i knew it was inevitable)

but here's where it gets fucked up because the lab didn't give me the hemogoblin results, only the blood type test results. i waited the whole day to see if they would hand them over but they never did.

i was in critical condition and they didn't give me the information that i needed until it was already 8PM. and only because they called my mom to tell her that they were pretty low (i was at 4 g/dL).

i prepared a backpack with stuff that i remembered i didn't have the last time i was there. my dad drove me to the emergency room and i was hospitalized again

the last time i was there i was told if the bleeding wouldn't stop with medication i would have to get an uterine curettage, so that's what happened

i was given blood transfusions that first wednesday night and the next day. on friday i got woken up pretty early to get into surgery.

a friend of my dad that works at the hospital visited me while i waited for my surgery to start and he talked to me for a moment. and then i was taken into the operating room.

waiting for everything to start was nerve wracking. we were waiting on the anesthesiologist since he was assisting another two operations. the doctor approached me after some time and told me they had taken the decision to place an IUD after the curettage because it would help me in the long run to stop the bleeding. i signed the consent forms and then the anesthesiologist finally came.

they gave me spinal anesthesia and let me fucking tell you, it hurts like hell and its demons came to dance on your back. its fucking awful. it fucking hurts so bad. its agonizing pain and i was sobbing uncontrollably and the guy was like "stop shaking or you could get paralyzed" and i was like "i know that and i'm trying very hard not to move but it fUCKING HURTS"

after that was done i remember the guy hovering over me and being like "we're going to give you oxygen" and then

when i woke up i remember seeing another blood bag hanging over my left side and then getting the oxygen thing off. i coughed and then BOOM awake af !!! the nurses moved me to one of those beds with wheels and then i was taken into the recovery room

i knew that i had to wake up my legs so i could go back to my room. so i started doing the kill bill thing like "okay move your big toe" it fucking worked i was moving both feet and i was sitting up in no time (since they don't need to cut you open for this kind of surgery)

i was in some moderate pain but the bleeding had stopped and that was really all that mattered to me. after that i got food and my mom came to see me to bring me stuff. among the stuff was a booklet with letter soups and thats what kept me sane for the rest of the time i was there

i was free to go the next day. the doctor did a biopsy while i was in surgery and i'm still waiting on the results of that. the doctor said that with the amount of medication i had been given on the weeks leading up to the surgery it should have stopped and the bleeding shouldn't have been that extreme. so something wrong with me and they gonna find what

the doctor said that my body will need 2-3 months to adapt to the IUD. on those first months i'll still have periods but they'll be lighter. eventually after a while i'll stop having periods altogether, which hell yeah fucking finally

last blood test i had 10 g/dL hemogoblin, which is still not great, but it's better than fucking 4. i just have to keep eating stuff rich in iron, and take my iron suplemments and vitamins and i'll keep getting better.

idk what the future holds regarding this shit but i guess being that close to dying has really given me some perspective

like my daily stresses seem so miniscule to me now that after a while i'm like "ah whatever at least im not dying"

so thats something i guess

i'll forever be grateful to the people that donated blood for the blood bank in the hospital because thanks to them i lived to be annoying for another day. i'll forever be grateful to my friends and family that also donated blood for me.

and i'm glad that i didn't give up, and that i was too stubborn to die. ahorita no, parquita. luego nos vemos, flaca.

so yeah. i lived.

[dredshirtroberts]

God it's no wonder i never thought of my birthday as anything really special and have just been waiting for people to forget it's a thing for years. Fuck the reality of the situation dawned on me and my god is it depressing.

Like...

When your choice - the thing you pick to do because you want to and think it will be fun - for your EIGHTEENTH BIRTHDAY is a Southern Republican Leadership Convention and the only reason you can complain about it 13 years later is because your politics have changed so drastically (for the better, absolutely for the better do not get me wrong), something has gone deeply, deeply wrong in how your family has handled your birthday up to that point.

oh sure we did fun things over my birthday but it wasn't like I had requested we go on a 2 week trip across the country by minivan, mainly camping the whole way in early springtime, and the only reason we were in town to be able to go to the Washington National Art Museum was because my dad wanted to go to a weekend hockey camp, and that just so happened to be the same weekend when the hockey team my family rooted for actually fucking won a game to get into the Stanley Cup on *coincidence* like...

My sister always complained about what we did "for" my birthday, especially if it was something I specifically requested (like the Art Museum because if we're going to be there and i'm 16 and fucking really into art, i wanna go to the art museum because what the fuck else is there for me to choose from in April in Washington DC?). You know what we did for her birthday *at her request* multiple years in a row? Waterparks, Amusement parks, fancy dinners at her favorite restaurant. My mom *chose* to go on long family vacations over her birthday, it wasn't on accident and coincidental and because we were already going to be there, it was on purpose and the reason we were going was *for* her birthday (except that one year, when it was for my sister's choir opportunities but one year as opposed to *multiple instances.)* We went to the beach many many times for my dad's birthday. We always did things *they* wanted to do.

When I became "fun" to hang out with (read: I was old enough to drink alcohol with my parents), I did a sit and drink with my family at a local bar until my little sister drove us home. I went to the only gay bar in a 100 mile radius with my roommate and didn't even drink, and no one even really cared it was my birthday. I went out drinking with my parents, my aunt and her at the time boyfriend (now husband) and their frat buddy and we lost my aunt, my mother collapsed because she was too drunk and I had to half carry her to the corner where my sister was going to pick us up, and hand feed her chips my dad bought for her when he finally fucking caught up like fifteen minutes later after we told him it was time to go home.

My requests for my birthday were "Something small, at home, nothing fancy, just maybe if we could get steaks and potatoes and broccoli, and a fun dessert" because if I made a big fuss, it was always "oh well that's really expensive and we all know your sister is going to want a big ol' birthday and man we really can't plan for that, and boy the off season in springtime is a terrible time to do things huh? Except for when it's your mother who has an earlier birthday but that's obviously beside the point"

My birthday this past year, another "milestone" in my family were it for anyone else, was a complete disregard for my request of something small because I didn't want anything big. And I got ignored. At my own birthday. And told that my family doesn't believe what I tell them about myself. And judged and berated and the only reason any of that was saved was because my partner loves me and even though they lived far away at that time, they bothered to try and do something special for me, but only within the bounds of what i was comfortable with and that's all i wanted.

i cried because i hadn't gotten anything even close to that in over 2 decades. I didn't know i could *like* my birthday.

I am....I am so mad. I am furious. but also? mainly? I am just...

i'm really fucking sad. what the *fuck*.

[thestoryden]

Hey, i was wondering if you could write an eddie x reader where her parents fight, can't really provide a good home so she goes to his trailer for comfort a lot! No smut please, thank you!

Home for the Weekend

Paring: Eddie x Fem!Reader Warnings: Parental Abuse Word Count: 751

i am in love with this request. i worked on this in between some other of my fics. hopefully it comes out to your liking anon ❤.

also my requests are open, but it is taking a bit of time to get through them all.

A cup hurdles over your head and smashes into the wall. It shatters to pieces and falls to the floor. Then a saucer comes after it. You duck down. 

“Seriously?” your dad yells. “Dishes at the kid.” 

“Well, Mark, sorry for having such a bad aim.” your mom screams back. “I was trying to hit you.” 

She sits back down at the table. Trying to compose herself. 

“Can we just, like, eat.” you interject. 

“Go to your room.” your dad retorts, “you can come back and eat when you stay out of other people’s business.” 

You purse your lips and get up and head for your room. You shut the door behind you and slide down it. 

“Young Lady!” your mother calls out. “You better stop slamming doors in my house.” 

You sob and cover your mouth. You click the lock on your door as softly as possible. You feel like the sound will swallow you up when you hear it. It sets off another back and forth between your parents. You throw on a hoodie and head for your window. You slide it open and climb out. You grab your bag from your bed and pull it through the window. Then shut it behind you, leaving it slightly cracked. You tumble towards the forest as you scramble towards the shortcut to Eddie’s. 

When you arrive at his door there is a note waiting for you. 

“Y/N, gone out to get food be back soon. Eddie.” 

You laugh. Of course, he knew you were coming over. It was 6’oclock on a Saturday. You had come over consistently every Saturday night for the past four weeks, because your parents kept trying to have “family dinners”. This time it seems Eddie has finally caught the rhythm of things. You slump down at his door and wait. It feels like an eternity, but after a while Eddie pulls up in the driveway. You breathe a sigh of relief. 

“Y/N,” Eddie calls from his van, “You’re early to our appointment.” 

“Correction, Munson, you are late.” you jeer. 

He breaks out into a massive smile. You pop up from the ground as he half-tackles half hugs you. You push him off. 

“Okay, okay, I get it, you missed me.” you say. 

“A whole 24-hours without seeing your face, how could I not.” he laughs and ruffles your hair.

You enter into his trailer and head for his bedroom. You can’t help but take solace in the familiar surroundings and the quiet. This place seems like a pocket of the universe tucked away from time. You think about asking if you can stay the whole weekend. You drop your bag on the ground and lay back on Eddie’s bed.

“Hey sleepyhead,” he shouts from the kitchen, “come get some food before it gets cold.” 

“Oh, shit,” you say under your breath.

You scramble to the kitchen and grab a burger from the greasy bag. You bite into it and finally feel like you are not starving for the first time today. You tear through it. 

“Jesus,” Eddie says, “Do they not feed you over there?” 

You raise an eyebrow. 

“Sorry, not funny,” Eddie grimaces, “Do you want to talk about it?”

You have finished your food at this point and the thought of talking about your family situation makes your stomach jolt. 

“Eddie I-,” you start.

“-don’t want to talk about it. I get it,” he finishes, “but why not think it over with this.”

He reaches into another one of the bags and hands over a chocolate shake. 

You accept it begrudgingly and you both head to his room. 

“It was the same as the last time. Except this time, he- he-” your voice breaks, “he threw stuff at me.” 

You begin sobbing loudly. Eddie wraps his arms around you and you nuzzle into his chest. He reaches a hand to your head and smooths his hands gently over the crown of your head. 

“Hey, hey don’t worry. You can stay here as long as you need.” he says calmly. 

You rest in his arms and he gently rocks you, and you stay like that for hours until you drift off. He gently lays your head onto a pillow. He grabs a blanket and wraps himself up in it and lays down on the floor with a balled up hoodie for a pillow. Your body rises and falls slowly as you breathe, and he falls asleep watching your body move through the soft rhythm.

[talesofstyles]

Drs Styles

paediatric heart surgeon harry, husband harry and dad harry. honestly the holy trinity.

warning: they did it in the car. bloody animals.

Harry

“Move your car, please!”

“What are you going to do? Write me a ticket?”

“This is in the interests of safety for the children!”

I look at the time in the car. I’ve still got about twenty to twenty-five minutes to watch this drama unfold at the school gate. I just wish we had popcorn because drop-off and parking situations at the school gates are always more entertaining than Good Morning Britain. 

The school gate is a strange social scene, and honestly, I don’t blame my wife for trying to avoid it like a plague. Sometimes, you don’t even have to talk to these people to know everything about their lives and more. I swear there are more gossips in the class WhatsApp group and daily playground chattering than in the copies of The Sun and Daily Mail combined. You know who’s married, who’s getting a divorce, whose husband shagged the au pair again, whose party you haven’t been invited to, even who’s looking for a builder. 

I see the school caretaker chuckling to himself as he sweeps the autumn leaves off the pathway, no doubt also enjoying our morning entertainment. 

“Why is Mrs Chambers screaming like that?” Alma, our eldest daughter, asks from the back of the car. 

“Because that man parks his car in a drop-off zone,” I reply, still watching him as he removes a child from his car seat. “Do you know who that is?”

“I think the boy is your classmate,” Alma turns to her sister.

Fiona, our youngest, peers over to inspect. “Oh yeah, that’s Rufus and his dad.”

“Do we like Rufus?”

“Not unless we like boys who pee down the slides,” Fiona scrunches her nose up. “He stood at the top and peed down like a waterfall. I haven’t gone down the slide ever since.”

I shake my head and let out a chuckle. “M’sure they’ve cleaned it up since, button.” 

Did you know that choosing a school for your child after nursery can be a head-throbbing, stomach-twisting, heart-pounding experience? Well, it can. How is one supposed to choose a school anyway? According to the proximity? Leavers Results? Adorable uniforms? Parents’ agendas?

After many, many discussions and visits through more schools than I can count, we ended up with Thomas’s Kensington. It’s a great school, and only ten minutes away from our home, making school runs easier. The downside of this school is the fact that it costs us an arm and a leg and that they’re always trying to rip us off any chance they get. Also, they only take the kids until 11, so after that, we’ll have to look for other schools again. But since our girls are only seven and five, we can worry about that later. 

There’s a strange mix of parents at this place. I went to school up in the North and the school gate scene is nothing like this. Here there are more au pairs, fancy cars, nicer clothes and people coming with impressive tans from their last weekend break in Antibes. The kids here are suited up too: the PE kit is the size of a small weekender bag, and we put them in uniforms that make them look smart, hoping that will increase the size of their brains. A child walks past our car with a cello case, another with a hockey stick. It’s a different land here. One that my socialist in-laws constantly tease us about and one which my mum was hysterical about because she was scared her grandbabies would be little Tories. I promised her I’d keep them grounded by only giving them plain hobnobs. None of those luxury chocolate covered ones.

Jokes aside, my girls are happy here. They’re thriving. They learn French and Spanish and Mandarin, even if they share a class with kids who have ridiculous names like Kitty and Archibald. 

A knock at my window calls me to attention. I wind it down.

“Are you Fiona’s dad?” A mum asks me.

“I am.”

“It’s about Ophelia’s riding party this Saturday at the riding stables.” 

Like I said, it’s a different land here.

“I thought we RSVPed to that?” I look at her in confusion.

“Yes, you did, but we have to change the food options as one of the partygoers is allergic to nuts. I’m making everyone aware and we need to let the guests know that they can’t bring any nuts on the day.”

A dirty joke is right there on the tip of my tongue and I’m trying my hardest to keep it in. My wife would definitely find it funny though, I’ve got to remember this and tell her later. 

“Noted,” I mean, I wasn’t going to send my daughter to a party with a packet of cashews anyway but I nod politely.

“And just gift vouchers for gifts please. Smiggle, if you can.”

Again, I nod, biting my tongue at the presumptuousness. But then I suddenly panic, because we haven’t entered the realms of pony riding just yet. Do I have to buy jods and boots? If I don’t, will my daughter be the odd one out? But Ophelia’s mum saunters off before I’ve got the chance to ask.

“Do I have to go to that party, daddy?” Fiona asks. 

“Well, we’ve already replied, poppet,” I tell her. “Did you not want to go?”

“I’ll go if I have to.”

I don’t answer because I get distracted by a vacant space. I edge the car forward so my girls can hop off. 

“I love you both. Have a good day, make good choices.” 

“Bye daddy! We’ll see you after work!”

***

Evelina London Children’s Hospital is our second home. Of course, as a children’s hospital, we try to make the place as fun as possible as not to freak those little patients out at being ill. It is bright and primary coloured, and each ward is decorated according to its own theme with different colours and lovely artworks. There are televisions and toys almost in every corner. We have a giant slide on the ground floor, and even the bins are shaped like red London buses. The aim was to help the children to forget that they’re in a hospital and take their minds off their sickness.

Since my wife and I are in the same department, our offices are next to each other, both overlooking the Thames. It’s nice up here. Would’ve been nicer if we could sneak in a quickie, but that’s practically impossible with our shared secretary’s desk sitting literally in front of our doors. 

Speak of the devil.

“Good morning. Here’s your tea,” my secretary follows me into my office with a cup of tea and a tiny plate with a couple of rich tea fingers. “Clinic until 3 pm, scheduled PDA ligation in the laboratory for 4 pm and then evening rounds on the wards.”

“Mornin’ Rhonda, you look lovely today,” I greet her cheerily. She’s a stern-looking woman who definitely likes her tea as strong as tits and who has probably never cried in her life. With such severity, she runs a tight ship, but she secretly has this affectionate side in her too. Not only is she a great secretary, but she also takes care of us in a way as a grandma does. She makes us tea, feeds us in between surgeries with biscuits or nice baby cheeses and crackers just so we wouldn’t starve. 

See that sofa over there in the corner of my office? Rhonda got me that. It was around the time when I had just become a new father with the sweetest, most gorgeous little baby who did not sleep. Alma wasn’t a fussy baby though. For some reason, she just wouldn’t go back to sleep after her midnight feed for months. Believe me, I tried everything. I changed her nappy, I swayed and jiggled and rocked and sung her to sleep. Odd nonsensical songs like, ‘Alma darling go to sleeep. Sleepy sleep sleep. Pleeeeease. I’m so tirrrred. My eyeballs may actually exploooode. I don’t want you to see thaaat.’ And she would just look at me all wide-eyed like I’d lost the plot. Those were song lyrics? That was rubbish. Please don’t give up your day job. Also, it’s not sleeping time. I’m awake. I’m ready for life. Come on, entertain me, old man. Isn’t this nice, just you and me? Tell me everything you know. EVERYTHING. 

Except of course she didn’t say all that. She would just stare at me and I had no idea what was going on in her little head. 

I took over my wife’s patients at the hospital during her maternity leave, so I had longer hours at the hospital. One day Rhonda found me napping on the floor between surgeries, so she sweet-talked some porters into looking for any old sofas on the go and paid to have this one reupholstered. She even bought me a fleece throw for it too. We really don’t deserve her.

“You hittin’ on me?” She deadpans. “Yer wife not doing it for you these days?”

“It’s the blazer. I’m a sucker for a blazer.”

“If I’d known, I would’ve worn it more often,” she replies. “Did my nice dress yesterday not give you the fanny flutters?”

“It’s schlong shiver for me,” I roar with laughter. “And it’s the tartan, makes you look well old.”

“YN, yer husband’s a bloody git, did I ever tell you that?” Rhonda says loud enough for my wife to hear, and I can hear my wife’s laughter from her office next door. “Drink your tea. Your first clinic appointment is in twenty.”

“Yes ma’am,” I salute her. 

***

The Arctic ward in the Evelina is home to many of our imaging, heart and kidney services. The name is probably giving it away, but everything is decorated in blue and white to go with the theme. We have several zones, and since paediatric cardiology clinics are held in the Walrus zone, I spend a great deal of time each day looking at walrus and snowflake decals. 

“Doctor Styles!” I hear a little voice shouts in excitement as I walk towards the waiting room in the outpatient ward. I smile, because I recognise that voice even before I see the little person.

The waiting room is very open here compared to other hospitals. There’s a sea of noise, snacks, tiny juice boxes and colouring pages. There’s also always a look of expectation, judgement on the faces of parents and guardians every time I walk in. They want to see if their doctor is old or qualified enough to see their children. There’s always one child who has the whole gang with them; parents, two sets of grandparents and even several aunts and uncles, and there’s also at least one child running around in circles out of boredom. 

This little lad bounces off his chair and hurls himself at me in a way like a little puppy would when its owner comes home from work. I put an arm out, hoping that he’ll apply the brakes but no such luck and he bundles himself into my arms. “Nice to see you, mate.”

His parents smile as they watch their son’s antics, who then runs off as I shake their hands. I turn around to see what caught his attention, and I can’t help but chuckle when I realise it’s my wife. 

“Doctor pretty Styles!” He exclaims excitedly as he bundles himself into her arms. She gets a mouthful of curls in the process. 

“Hi Rory,” she greets him as she runs her fingers through his curly mop. 

“Oi,” I pout as I walk towards them. “You don’t think I’m pretty?”

“Your wife is prettier,” he says with a shrug, his tone matter-of-fact.

She laughs and gives him a high-five. “Rory, you are officially my favourite patient.”

She is right. Rory is one of our special patients for sure. We’ve both known him for about six years now, ever since Rory’s mum gave birth to this tiny human next door at St Thomas and his heart was literally broken. I remember watching proudly from the theatre when my wife replaced two of his valves when he was born. It was in our early years of training. Long time patients like Rory almost always feel like family. We’ve seen all their parents’ tears and watched over their children throughout the years. They send us cards and wine every Christmas and despite all attempts to keep a professional distance, their kids do feel like our own.

Rory shrugs off his dinosaur rucksack and unzips it, pulling out a drawing of a blue whale and an opened packet of KitKat. I like that the whale wears a top hat and appears to also don a moustache. 

“I drew you both a picture. Only one though, because I figure you can share,” he says with a big toothy grin and hands the packet of KitKat to my wife. “And I’ve got half a KitKat here. Do you want it?”

“I’m good for now. Keep that KitKat for later on the tube,” she smiles and waves at Rory as she begins to walk away towards the fetal cardiology ward just down the hall. “Bye Rory, thanks for the picture.”

“Bye doctor pretty Styles,” Rory replies, making my wife laugh as she walks away. I give her a wave and a wink. 

“Hey Rory, did you know a blue whale has a heart the size of a small car?” I ask him and his eyes widen.

“No way! That’s mega!” He exclaims. “Do you think you could operate on a whale heart?”

“I would need a very big ladder,” I tell him. “And a wetsuit. I’d give it a go though.”

A senior nurse from the outpatient ward, Florence approaches us with a junior nurse trailing behind her. “Dr Styles, always a pleasure.”

I smile at her. “Florence. How are we today?”

“Busy as usual,” she replies. “We’re about twenty minutes behind I’m afraid. We had Dr Goodridge in this morning and you know he likes to talk.”

“He always runs over,” I chuckle. “Well, don’t worry. I’ll skip lunch and get us back up to speed.”

“I’ll make sure to send some snacks for you. Here’s your chart, your files are already in your office. And this is Alice, your nurse today. She’s newly qualified so might need some instructions.”

The new nurse looks terrified so I smile at her to try and calm her fears. I totally get that. When you work in medicine, unfortunately, you’ll realise that there are a lot of rude self-important wankers. 

I look down at my chart and find Rory’s name on the top of the list. “Well, look who’s coming with me to the exam room.”

Rory reaches out to hold my hand and we walk towards the examination room. His parents follow us closely, carrying the usual coats and devices that people do when they know they’re bound for a hospital waiting room. I see them inside and sit behind the desk.

“So, young man, I hear we’ve had a touch of drama with you. Can you tell me what happened?”

I’ve actually already got the information in the file, but I like the way this kid tells a story. He reminds me of my youngest. 

“So… I was at school and we were doing PE and I wasn’t really feeling it because it was cold and really we should have been inside but Mr Witter makes us go outside because he used to be in the Army apparently and he says we should get used to the cold but that’s what they do in prisons.”

I smile. “Go on.”

“And then my heart started running.”

“You mean racing?”

He nods firmly. Racing isn’t even the word. It sprinted to the finish like Bolt at 252 beats per minute, three times the speed it should.

“It felt like bubbles in my chest and then the school went crazy panicky and they called the ambulance and they brought me to the hospital but not this one, it was another one and it wasn’t as good because you weren’t there and they had really bad biscuit.”

His mum adds. “And they gave him some drugs to bring it back to a steady rhythm; they were close to shocking him.” Her voice trails off and both parents’ faces look drawn and pale remembering the incident.

Rory looks absolutely unbothered by this. To be fair, we have put this little man through everything. We’ve cut his chest open more times than is necessary for someone so small, we hook him up to machines and put him on treadmills. His resilience and character amaze me, and I really can’t imagine what it feels like to see your child so vulnerable and helpless, to be paralysed and weighed down with such worry.

“Alright then, little man, we need to make sure that your heart is working as it should. This is Alice, and she is going to take you over for an ECG and we just need to make sure your tick-tock is in good shape.”

Rory nods and jumps off the chair. His dad offers him a piggyback, and his mum smiles at them. I can hear Rory offering that half KitKat to Alice as they leave the room. 

His mother turns to me as the door is closed, her shoulders relaxing, allowing herself to breathe. “And how are you?” I ask her.

“You just think it’s done and then something like that comes along to scare you,” she says with a sigh.

“Let’s have these tests and then see if it’s anything major to worry about,” I try to calm her. “Episodes of rapid heartbeat is quite common in Rory’s case, and we can look into drugs to remedy that if necessary.”

She smiles, nodding.

“Did you have any other questions for me?”

She studies my face for a moment too long. “I… well, it will show up in Rory’s records soon, but my husband I are… I mean we’re getting a divorce.”

I pause for a moment. Of course, I know these things happen in life, but I’ve known this couple for years. I’ve seen them at their lowest ebb, bound by friendship and their love for that boy. I really do feel sorry for them.

“Oh, I’m sorry,” I mumble.

“We just… we’re terrified about telling Rory.”

“He doesn’t know?” I ask.

She shakes her head. “We’re scared of breaking him. I mean, look at him. All of this stuff he’s been through and he carries on like nothing has happened. We don’t want to upset him.”

“It took a team of us the best part of six years to build Rory’s heart. There's a warranty on that workmanship,” I reassure her. “Have that chat with him. He’ll be fine.”

***

“Have we got time for dinner first?” I turn to my wife as we walk out of the hospital. We don’t normally have the luxury of ending our shift at the same time, but today is exceptional. We have parents’ evening at the girls’ school so Rhonda made sure to clear up our schedule after our evening rounds at the ward. 

“No, but we can raid M&S and eat in the car?”

I’m starving and I almost cry with relief at the suggestion. “Always knew I married the right woman.”

She chuckles. “Damn right you did.”

We leave the car at the hospital and she drags me along the walkways to Waterloo, the breeze biting at our cheeks. I pull her into M&S, dodging the marching commuters and grab a basket. 

“I’ll look for some wine,” she says before she saunters off. “Oh and I want sushi. None of that crap with the mayonnaise please.”

“Alright.”

I skipped lunch today so the whole place calls to me. I start taking very random things off the shelves: a packet of raspberry iced buns. That’ll do. I also take some hummus for my wife because she bloody loves hummus. I’m not even joking, I’ve seen her down a whole pot of it. Then I take some sushi as requested, some coleslaw, a family bag of mature cheddar and red onion crisps and a trifle. I hope I don’t bump into Rhonda. Next are cheese twists, noodle salad and cocktail sausages. 

It takes me a while to notice that there is a man right next to me with a roll of yellow stickers in their back pocket. Hello there, you are one of my favourite people tonight. Have I managed to find that sacred hour when all the food is being marked down? He labels some prawns with dip and even though I get a little squeamish about eating fish near its expiry date, I put it in my basket. I then follow him around the corner. Now, this is dinner. I put all sorts of random food in my basket and smile at the thought.

Ooh, knockdown pizzas. I should get a pizza. That’s tomorrow’s tea sorted, the girls will love it. Although I can’t help but wonder, what’s the limit for us to feed our daughters frozen pizza in a week before they get taken away from us? But eh, we might be able to get away with it if we give them frozen peas on the side. 

“Look at you,” says my wife, depositing two bottles of red in the basket. 

“Yes, it’s me. I’m the yellow sticker bitch.”

She snickers as we turn to head for the tills. “Excellent work.”

***

“Mr and Mrs Styles, welcome.”

“Mrs Ebner, always a pleasure,” I shake the headmistress’ hand who’s standing at the door. 

“Busy evening?” My wife asks her as she shakes her hand next.

“Always,” the headmistress replies with a smile, then proceeds to speak like she’s reading out of brochures. “But such a wonderful opportunity to connect with our parents and build on the special relationships we have with our school community.” 

Two uniformed minions appear.

“Lewis, Maggie, could you please show Mr and Mrs Styles through to the drinks reception?”

They both nod in unison. The boy holds his arms out like a waiter showing us to our table. We follow them through the school’s grand corridors to the main hall. It’s the one thing I like about this place. It’s very Hogwarts-like with hefty engraved name boards and sepia photos of successful sports teams. In the hall, a throng of parents mill around waiting to see respective teachers. It’s the same every year. We all dodge the people from the PTA trying to sell us quiz tickets, and the bowls of crisps out of hygiene concerns.

“Red or white?” Asks a lady in an apron.

This right here is the very reason we get through parents’ evening. From the look of the bottle, it’s decent wine too. I think that’s where a good proportion of our fees is going. 

“Red, please.”

We both take our glasses and walk to the corner of the hall. It’s essentially a holding area without the background music. The idea is that all the parents will get on and create a party vibe but it just becomes a strange family gathering. As terrible as it sounds, it’s sorted into cliques: parents who know each other via NCT groups, the international expat brigades who keep to themselves, the parents who’ve ostracised themselves by gossip, the ones who you know regularly brunch and ski together.

The boy from earlier suddenly appears in front of us. “Mrs Hughes is ready for you.”

I put my hand on the small of my wife’s back as we walk towards the classroom. Fiona’s teacher first and then Alma’s straight after. Right, we can do this.

“Mrs Hughes, we meet again,” I shake her hand. I’ve got no qualms about Mrs Hughes. She’s a seasoned teacher who likes a slack and sensible moccasin and we’re familiar with her since she taught Alma two years previously. When we enter the classroom, Lewis bows in reverence, taking his leave and I wonder whether to tip him. 

“It’s always lovely to have another Styles girl in my classroom. Fiona is a particular delight.”

My wife and I smile proudly. I’m sure Mrs Hughes says this to every parent here about their child, but that’s always nice to hear. 

“She talks a lot about you,” my wife says. “She seems to have settled in well.”

Mrs Hughes opens up a couple of books and it’s classic Fiona. Alma is ordered and neat—if she makes a mistake then she erases it completely and she underlines things with a ruler and listens to instruction carefully. She gets that from her mum. Fiona though, on the other hand, she’s all me. She has more wild abandon about her; no rulers, no rubbers. She puts giant crosses through things that don’t work and likes her bubble writing decorated with doodles of many, many cats.

I glance around the classroom as Mrs Hughes talks to us about standardised scores. The theme of the school is to show you how smart and educated these children are. Look at the copperplate handwriting, their reproductions of Van Gogh and our languages corner where they’ve all had a go at telling us what they like in French. I spy a contribution from my girl. J’adore les chats et le gâteau au chocolat. 

I’ve lost track of the conversation so I try to catch up.

“So to push Fiona into those top scores, perhaps we can look into tutoring? For maths, in particular, so she can grasp some of the concepts a little more tightly,” says Mrs Hughes. 

My wife and I look at each other confused. “Uh, I don’t think there’s a need, right? She’s only five.”

“It’s never too early,” replies Mrs Hughes. “We run an after-school tutoring club on Tuesdays that would help.”

Back when I was a youngster, clubs were fun endeavours that involved matching baseballs caps or were a chocolate biscuit that you had in your lunchbox. Maths tutoring session was not a club.

I ask her. “Is it free?”

“It’s fifteen pounds per session.”

See? My point being this should be a parents’ evening, not a sales session.

“Well, then it’s something to think about,” says my wife. “It could be that Fiona catches up with people throughout the year.”

“Possibly,” Mrs Hughes nods. Still, though, she proceeds to go into her folder and passes me a form. Sneaky. “Fiona has also shown great interest in languages and art. Her pictures have been a joy.”

Mrs Hughes goes to a file and pulls one of Fiona’s drawings. I glance down at it. It’s a standard child piece of art. The grass and sky are strips of colour to the top and bottom. It’s a family portrait, and we are as tall as the broccoli style trees. Wait, hang on a second. I count the number of people in the picture again. Is that-

“And Mrs Styles, I gather congratulations are in order,” she says with a smile. “Such lovely news.”

“I’m sorry?”

“Fiona told me it’s a boy,” she adds, and the sheer terror on my wife’s face at the realisation is priceless. “You must be very thrilled.”

I study the picture. There’s a house in the middle, and standing in a line in front of the house is our family. The one slightly taller than the broccoli tree is me. I’ve got my white lab coat, and I look like a serial killer because I’m holding a scalpel with the size of a butcher’s knife. Next to me is my wife, also with a white lab coat, but instead of a scalpel, she’s holding a very chunky baby who rather looks like a basketball with a head.

“Oh dear,” I chuckle. “Guess now we know what she’ll ask for Christmas.”

“Yeah,” my wife shakes her head. “We’re not expecting.”

“Oh, I apologise,” Mrs Hughes says with a sheepish smile.

“No worries, Mrs Hughes,” I tell her. “So, what else has our girl been up to here? Besides gossiping of course.”

Mrs Hughes laughs under her breath. “Well, in class, Fiona is attentive, bright and very helpful. She is a credit to you both.”

***

“I swear your daughter, Styles.”

We’re sitting in the car now. Finally done with parents’ evening, still laughing at the slightly creepy, chunky basketball baby in Fiona’s picture and the fact that three people, including Mrs Hughes, have congratulated us for the ‘baby’.

“You haven’t called me Styles in years,“ I turn to her with a grin. “Not since medical school.”

I can’t help but flashback to the good ol’ days when we had matching university hoodies and we’d test each other on the parts of a kidney whilst walking into lectures, sitting next to each other, sharing pens and cans of Lilt. 

“Well, after that I became a Styles too,” she chuckles. “Would be confusing then, wouldn’t it?”

“True,” I laugh under my breath, then I grab her hand and pull it to my mouth so I can kiss her knuckles. “Thank you.”

“What for?”

“For being a Styles.”

“Aw, aren’t we soppy tonight?” She smirks. “Alright, stop the car.”

“What?”

“There,” she points to a dark empty spot and I oblige. 

Then, before I can even ask her why, she reaches over and grabs me by the collar. Pulling me close to her and gives me a kiss. I kiss her back, and I smile when she bites gently on my bottom lip.

“Oi, oi. Something’s got you randy.”

The next thing I know, she undoes her seatbelt and then rolls her trousers down her legs along with her knickers, fumbling and giggling at the awkward movement. I push my seat back and pull my trousers down. 

“Don’t fall on gearstick now,” I joke as she climbs over to straddle me. “Well, unless you want to, of course…”

She laughs as she lowers herself over my lap. I really can’t believe what’s happening here.

“Mrs Styles, we’re about to have sex in a car. Around the corner from our daughters’ school.” 

“I know,” she says with a smile before she runs her tongue along my neck. “Not our first rodeo though.”

“Oh right, we did it in our Volvo years ago, didn’t we? Thought the suspension couldn’t take it.”

“And it turned out fine. Told you that you needed to have more faith in the Swedes, they’re a reliable breed.”

“I love it when you talk about Sweden.”

“Ikea.”

“Fuck.”

“Meatballs.”

“Billy Bookcase.”

She throws her head back in laughter and I take this as an opportunity to run my tongue along her collar bone. She gasps. I reach down to lift her before I slowly lower her over my cock. We both sigh as I enter her, a long exhalation with our lips barely touching. 

“Viggo Mortensen.”

“Isn’t he Danish?”

“Tomato, Tomahto.”

I smile at my wife and push my hips up, silently telling her that we don’t need to talk about Swedish people anymore. She grabs onto the car seat and levers herself up and down. I look at her in the eye, a goofy smile still plastered across my face.

But then I squint. Light. Bollocks, what’s that? Where’s that light coming from? Crap, that’s bright. Shit. I see the flash of a hi-vis jacket, a knock at the window and someone shaking their head.

Oh sodding fucking bollocking shit wank.

[beann-e]

Bnha Characters reacting to when you quit your job

bakugou

your steps were quiet as you tried to work up the energy to unlock your front door. Your hands sweating and cold when you finally got the energy to put the key in the lock a deep exhale leaving your lips when you finally walked in.

Your Body only carrying you to your kitchen counter before you dropped your keys and bag on the same counter your body now rested against.

The room heating up and shifting from the ice quiet atmosphere youd created when you felt strong arms wrap around your waist and pull you back to meet a hard chest

Small kisses being planted on the side of your neck as you let out another sigh of relief as you spoke trying not to drown in the comfort being given to you “ baby “

Your body shook as you heard a deep grunt of acknowledgment “ we — we need to talk “

you felt as another set of kisses were placed to your neck before his head snuggled into the spot between your neck and shoulder “ I— I think I made a mistake“

You bit at your lip as you kept going “ I— I was trying my best to stick up for myself y’know like you told me”

“ mm—and did you“

“ I did —I mean I did stick up for myself and I had to I needed to bu—”

“ slowly losing interest y/n “

you let out a shallow cough “ but I think I did it at the wrong time “

his body stood up a bit straighter head still remaining in the same place somehow “ baby I —i lost my job “

You felt as your boyfriends body went hard almost as if he was trying not to slam your own body into the floor in anger his grip around your waist only getting tighter “ like I said I — I wrong time“

“ wrong time? — y/n wrong place “ he screamed as he jolted your soul out of your already shaken figure. His head flying back to look at you conveying all the anger and annoyance he held, “ what the fuck do we do now “

you let out a small laugh to try to ease the tension “ we — we rely on your hero check ? “

You watched as he sucked his teeth and moved out of the kitchen “ I can barely feed a fucking roach with my salary y/n “ his voice getting louder as he walked into the living room you following closely behind “ i — i can barely feed you — us — y/n this is why we don’t have little crumb snatchers running around now “

his voice deep and heavy “ cause we’re broke do you get that babe ? huh no — fuck — you— fuck fuck fuck you gotta go back — you can’t just be chilling around the fucking house while i’m working my ass off that’s not how starting a family works y/n “

“ baby it’s just until I can get a new job “

“ tch— and how long will that take y/n “

“ well I— “

“ huh months ? “

“ well n— “

“ couple weeks “

“ I mean hopefull— “

“ babe you don’t even fucking know “ he sighed as he griped the skin on the bridge of his nose “ so fucking stupid — so so so fucking stupid “

the room went quiet as your eyes dropped to the ground. “ wel— no — I — I don’t know kats” you shook your head “ I— I really don’t“

“ and that’s the problem y/n “ he screamed eyes finally opening to look at you.

God, he loved you but seriously you just didn’t think sometimes

It’s not that he was calling you stupid it’s just that he really really loved you

He loved that you listened to him. That whenever he gave advice you heard it and went with it.

The night he told you to speak up he was honestly just fucking with you. He always forgets that he has someone who loves him now meaning he’s taken seriously. He always forgets he’s not in high school anymore.

He can’t say something crazy and asshole—ish and expect to just be ignored. He has someone that loves him and will truly listen.

Your not the stupid one

nor the one in the wrong he is

and he knows he is because he heard everything you said about your situation. Yet, he knew you were different from him whereas he had been speaking his mind for years regardless of ranks.

You couldn’t.

You had a job where everything relied on ranks and status. You couldn’t just say whatever the fuck you wanted to like he could and yet he convinced you that night to speak up whenever your boss gave you extra work you didn’t wanna do.

His eyes felt heavy and so did his body his brain automatically beating himself up as he stared at you imagining the rough day youd had. If he was pissed off with the current situation he could only imagine how you felt.

Someone who hated to rely on others yet, now having to rely on their boyfriend.

“ come here “ your eyes lit up at the statement as your tired body wobbled over and into bakugous arms. Head hitting his chest as he crushed you “ I love you and i’m proud of you “

your heart sank.

“ fuck those idiots you only have room for one anyways and hes— fuck trust me I know i’m enough “

Shoto

“ so “

“ so “

You sat on the couch legs splayed out in front of you and hands playing with the tassels of the pillows placed next to you.

God you loved these pillows. You actually remember the day you bought them.

Y’know back when you had money

“ y/n “ you watched as shoto shifted uncomfortably on the couch next to you “ my love what are you doing home “

He shook his head confused at the body placed comfortably next to his own “ your not supposed to be home for “ he looked down at his watch moving his suit jacket up his arm to create space and to make sure he was seeing the time correctly “ for 7 more hours “

you let out a short laugh “ you sound like you just got caught cheating sho “

his eyebrows crinkled together as he stared at you in disgust “ y/n I would never “

His hand moved to be placed on your thigh “my love is that what you think ? — if that’s why your here then I can assure you tha—I mean honestly if so I would never be stupid enough to disrespect you in our home— you could’ve went to my office at least I mea— “

“ I lost my job shoto “

The air shifted as the hand on your thigh suddenly felt colder than before “ I— I lost my job “

you took a deep breath shaking your head “ it’s a long story on why but i’ve been leaving the house — pretending really— to go to work “

You chuckled “ god i’m sucha bad person “ your small chuckle turned into a hearty laugh as you felt your body go slack “ A fucking horrible timekeeper too if I managed to forget my husband gets off before me on weekends “

“ do not say these things about yourself “

“ it’s not like it’s a lie “ your tear filled eyes coming up to look at his. ” right “

“ I will not stand for this y/n “

“ for what — having an unemployed s/o—i mean you already have one so not much to do about that “

you scoffed “ why don’t you want a housewife ? huh“ you smiled “ I can wear the skirts for you y’know with the aprons cook you dinner and maybe we can have kids y’know we can even get —“

“ enough “

your body shook your eyes widened facing the 6 ft male now towering over you “ your always joking about serious things and I — I don’t understand “ his eyebrows creasing in desperate need to understand you. Eyes darting around your face “ how “

his voice going deeper as he got angrier “ y/n you lost your job“ his eyes grew wide “ do you realize how serious this is “

“ wh— “ you shook your head letting out a short scoff “ of course I do —I mean sho i’m the one who qui—lost it “

“ no you clearly don’t “ he scoffed “ not if your sitting here making jokes in my face “

His mouth quirked up in disgust “ it’s almost insulting — disgusting really “

“ wh— sho—“ you felt as a tear fell from your eye “ baby what could be so disgusting huh ? so ‘ insulting ‘ about me choosing to leave huh “

his eyes softened “ because of your reason to leave “

“ my reason ? “

“ my love I know you — I know you didn’t get fired and I know you wouldn’t just leave you loved it there “

your head dropped as your fiddled with your fingers “ so that means something led you to make that life changing decision and it hurts me that you were forced to make it “

Your heart broke, he was right he was always right, for days at work youd been dealing with an overbearing co worker who would tell you to do everything they didn’t feel like doing and when you finally decided to say no to them

They went and told your boss. Who even though you’d been working there longer than your so called coworker still believed everything they were told.

That was the day that you sadly found out your job favored years over hard work.

Due to the other person being there longer you were trumped in telling your story. It was seen as not necessary because , someone who was there for so long would have no reason to lie on someone like you.

A newbie

“ someone made you quit this job “

“ sho no they— I decided “

You felt as the couch shifted from him kicking it. You thinking he was moving to grab his shoes except walking past them and unlocking the door instead.

“ baby where are you going — we need to talk about how we’re going to split the bills now that i— “

“ i’ll handle it “

“ shoto you can’t put everything on your dads card we’re not “ you let out a soft exhale “ we’re not children anymore “

“ i’ll pay for it all myself — and you can be my little housewife “ he scoffed as your expression grew sour “ it was so funny a moment ago right “

“ shoto i’m not gonna ask again where are you going “

“ where else “

your eyebrows came together in a furrow “ wh— “

“ my love you work for my company ? obviously who ever I put in charge “ he shrugged walking barefoot to his car unlocking the door “ isn’t doing a very good job if they fire their bosses s/o ? “

He got into the drivers seat as he turned the car on and reversed the car “ needs to learn respect no ? so i’ll just have them switch places with you“ he smiled softly “ i’ll see you when I get home “

His once furious eyes turning soft at your body hidden in pajamas “ go inside baby —it’s cold —go order us some takeout i’ll be back in a little ok “

“ sho “

“ just let me handle this —i love you and i’ll be right back my love—go “

You shook your head softly “ go y/n “

[i-need-entertainment]

Haikyuu Boys and the moment they thought their child came from satan

Characters: Akaashi, Washio, Konoha, Kita, Suna, Ushijima, Yahaba, Iwaizumi, Futakuchi, Daishou, Numai and Iizuna

Warnings: Children, children can be cruel- please proceed with caution, the guys being called not-nice-things cause kids are (albeit cute) incarnates of satan. I say this with love, and yes I have trauma, mentions of injuries, nerf guns and shooting someone with them, pushing someone down the stairs

Akaashi Keiji:

When your son was first born, he was very much a parents-only child. He didn’t like to be held by strangers, which were anyone not his parents.

But there was one exception to that rule, and that was Bokuto.

Which was good because even as an adult I don’t think Bokuto could handle being rejected by little Akaashi.

As he got older, he slowly warmed up to more people, but he was still very shy everywhere not home.

Bokuto had been visiting for the weekend, wanting to come see his friend and his family!

Bokuto had left that morning, and your son was still not happy. He really wasn’t a difficult kid, but this weekend had been a long and active one, so he was very tired.

And seeing as he was indeed Akaashi’s son, he was also very blunt.

“Come on buddy, let’s go take a nap. I know you’re tired.” Akaashi tried to coax his son to come with him, eye brows furrowing when his son shook his head and refused.

“Why not?” his son pouted as he looked up to his father.

“Cause I want uncle bokuto…” Akaashi frowned as he kneeled in front of his son, “I know, but he’ll be back to visit soon.”

His son shook his head, “No, I want him now, I want him to tuck me in.” One of Akaashi’s eyebrows rose, his head tilting to the side abit, “Why Uncle Bokuto? Why not daddy?”

His son sighed, “Because I don’t like you, I like Uncle Bokuto.” Before he trudged off towards his room, dragging his blue blanket behind him, leaving Akaashi speechless and betrayed.

You wasted no time in assuring Akaashi that ‘he didn’t mean it!’ and that ‘he probably won’t even remember it when he wakes up’. But that didn’t do much to sooth the seething pain of your first born betraying you✌😔

Washio Tatsuki:

Washio was outside with the kids, watching over them while they played.

You were inside, talking on the phone with your mom and sipping a cup of tea/coffee.

You were flipping through a magazine, laughing at a memory your mom had brought up, when the front door burst open.

Turning around, the smile on your face dropped when you saw Washio holding your youngest (3 yr old son), who was balling his eyes out.

Apologizing to your mom you stood up from the couch, immediately walking over to them.

“What happened?? Did he get hurt?” Washio sighed as he gently handed him off to you, running a hand through his hair as he shook his head.

“I don’t know, he won’t tell me. All I know is he’s scared, but he won’t tell me what scared him.”

You frowned as you held your little boy, cradling his head against your chest as you slowly rocked back and forth, whispering words of comfort into his ear and kissing the crown of his head.

Eventually, he stopped crying, he was still a bit sniffly and had a few hiccups, but he had settled down quite a bit.

You sat down on the couch with him on your lap, Washio standing after he had brought the twins in as well.

“Wanna tell me what scared you baby?”

Your little boy looked at you, slate gray eyes shimmering with tears as he wiped his cheek before turning to look up at your husband.

He pointed a little finger, “Daddy, daddy’s scary.” He then proceeded to dive back into you, head snuggling into your neck.

You quickly looked up to see your husband's eyes widen as his jaw dropped, looking down to your son in complete and utter disbelief.

It broke your heart the way he clung to you that night, head buried in your chest as he quietly asked if he was a good father, conclusion: kids can be cruel…

Please don’t hate me, i guarantee this hurt me more than it hurt you

Konoha Akinori:

You had brought out old videos from Konoha and yours high school years, wanting to show them to your kids since they were curious. And you and Konoha had wanted to trip down memory lane anyway.

You had chosen a game of Fukurodani vs Nekoma, since those were always good ones.

Your kids were more than entertained to watch it, since dad had long hair?!?!?

They also liked seeing some familiar faces, like Komi and Saru and others obviously.

But one of your children found a specific moment a little...too funny.

It had been a rough match, and a close one as Konoha had remembered it. Akaashi had been subbed out after a ball caught his nail, Washio had very minorly twisted his ankle, and Bokuto had already gone through 2 emo modes, the 3rd not far away.

Konoha had been getting over a cold, he was no longer sick but he wasn’t at 100% yet, so he wasn’t completely in it.

Not to mention he had to make up for the absence of both Akaashi AND Washio.

It was half way through the second set, he was in the back and Yamamoto was up to spike, only Konoha wasn’t expecting Yamamoto not to hit and instead for Kuroo to come up from the back, meaning the ball his Konoha right in the face, knocking him down on his butt.

You all kinda laughed at that part, I mean, who wouldn’t? (don’t lie-)

But what you didn’t expect was a full on demonic cackle coming from your 3 year old who was sat in between you and your husband.

It wasn’t a chuckle, or even a laugh, IT DIDN’T EVEN SOUND LIKE YOUR 3 YEAR OLD!!

It was...unsettling, and when she bounced back not 2 minutes later, you snuck a glance over to your husband, who was slowly scooting away.

Kita Shinsuke:

Kita came in from the fields, closing the door and slipping off his shoes, stretching his hands above his head as he groaned.

He smiled when he heard little foot steps echoing through out the hallway, watching as his little girl ran towards him and into his arms.

He smiled wider when you walked out of the nursery, little baby in your arms as you came up to him and gave him a kiss.

Time skip to dinner that night, all 4 of you are sat at the dinner table.

Kita is sat at his usual spot on the end, you sitting to his right as his daughter sat to his left, you feeding the baby.

He put down his fork to rub his neck, fingers trying to work out the knots that had formed over the past few days.

“You know, granny and I are going to get massages this weekend, why don’t you join us? Gin said he’d be willing to watch the kids.” Kita smiled towards you as he nodded.

“That’d probably be a good idea, thanks honey”

You nodded as you continued to feed your youngest, sending silly faces and smiling at her little giggles.

Kita was about to continue eating when his oldest daughter asked him a question.

“Hey daddy? Why do you need a mass-age.” He chuckled at the way his daughter said massage, going back to eating.

“I’m goin’ cause my neck is sore sweetheart, it’s just from work, nothin’ to worry bout.”

Your daughter nodded, returning her attention to her plate as well.

“So, basically, daddy’s just really, really old.”

You turned away so your husband wouldn’t see your smile, and it worked until you snorted and started laughing.

His small glare towards you only making you laugh harder.

“It’s not bad daddy, you’re just really old, but s’okay, I still love you.”

He shook his head, eating the rest of his dinner with a pout as your daughter carried on like nothing happened and you explained why she shouldn’t say those things.

Suna Rintaro:

Suna was sat on the couch with his oldest son and daughter, watching a movie.

Obviously it wasn’t scary or inappropriate for children, I mean, it was a kids movie. But he had to admit, this one was cutting it a little close.

He would have turned it off but...it really wasn’t that bad and the kids were sitting quietly and watching it, so he figured it’d be okay.

His kids weren’t exactly squeamish, and they didn’t scare easy, but they were also only 8 and 6, so he wasn’t going to risk it.

He also didn’t want to risk it with you, he had a comfy bed and he’d prefer to continue to sleep in it😊

Sometime after the half way point of the movie, a scene came up that was questionably violent for a kids movie. There wasn’t any gore or anything, but it wasn’t a clean death either.

He reached for the remote to change it when his kids started giggling.

Not like uncomfortable awkward chuckles, I mean real and sincere laughter...AND SOME DUDE HAD JUST DIED?!?!?!

Suna texted you with a ‘please help, our children are demons’ as he tried to return his focus to the movie and not his snickering children.

Ushijima Wakatoshi:

Ushijima had just picked 3 of his kids up from school, and was taking them home.

His 2 oldests were talking to each other about school while his youngest (of the 3, not in all), just sat quietly and listened to the radio.

His oldest had asked about his day, and Ushijima told him all about his practice and the practice games they played.

The 2 oldests were entranced, and loved hearing about the sport, his middlest however did not.

It’s not like he hated the sport, but it wasn’t really for him. He much preferred martial arts to volleyball, which was fine with Ushijima, at least his son was happy!

Anyway, Ushijima and his 2 oldests started to talk all about volleyball, the middlest looking confused.

“Wait, why is it like that?” Ushijima peaked in the rearview mirror, “It’s the rules, like how there are rules in Jujitsu.”

Your middlest turned towards the window, “Yeah, but Jujitsu is cool, volleyball sucks.”

Ushijima almost crashed, and it wasn’t long before he got home, pulled into the drive way, parked, and turned to face his middlest with a face that said ‘where did I go wrong…?’

His son just turned to face him, “What?” Ushijima shook his head, turned off the car and headed inside.

When he got inside and walked past you, all you heard was him muttering ‘no child of mine will say that about…’ as he headed straight for the bedroom to lie down.

Yahaba Shigeru:

Yahaba was walking around the living room, sorting through the mail as he separated bills and important things from junk mail.

He had been working in his office all day, doing paper work and what not, and right now he had his ear buds in since he was technically in a work meeting. (muted with the camera off cause how else do you do things virtual?)

So he was completely unsuspecting of his two sons as they snuck up behind him, both holding nerf guns in their hands as they crept closer and closer.

Yahaba had paused, slipping his phone out of his pocket as he started to talk to his coworkers about something when all of a sudden the unmistakable whirring of the automatic nerf gun started.

Before he could even turn around his sons had open fired right on their dad, Yahaba yelping as he started to run, grabbing a pillow from the couch as he fumbled with his phone, desperately trying to mute himself between being pelted with nerf bullets.

“ACK- hEy! You two! Quit it!-” He had made himself a shield out of the couch cushions, finally getting his phone and apologizing to his giggling coworkers, he wasn’t in trouble obviously, the distraction and entertainment was a gift to them all.

The meeting then finally ended, and Yahaba turned to find his sons searching for bullets, him shaking his head as he walked towards them.

“Nice try boys, but I collected the bullets as you shot me, so there’ll be no more of that.” His youngest shrugged as he then decided to instead throw the toy at Yahaba, his oldest then hitting him with it as he shrieked and made his way to the master bedroom.

Iwaizumi Hajime:

You and Iwaizumi had 3 boys.

3 boys who were close in age and high in energy, never a great combo when they’re stuck indoors because of the rain.

You had been taking a nap due to a weather-related head ache, while Iwaizumi did some work from home.

He had heard some questionable sounds coming from the basement, but he didn’t pay them any mind, figuring they were just being kids.

That is until he heard a distinct ‘ow!’ from his middlest.

Walking down the stairs he could hear his youngest chanting something like ‘fight! Fight! Fight!’ which obviously made him move faster.

He rounded the corner to see his oldest and middlest in the middle of a circle, each with one of his boxing gloves on as they circled each other.

“The heck are you guys doing??” They all turned to face him, that was when he noticed they had drawn on themselves to, what he guessed, look like pro-wrestlers, the basement was also a mess.

“Having a cage match, it’s 2 for 2 so far, this round decides the world-class-gladiator-basement-fight-to-the-death match, and the loser gets sacrificed.”

He almost let it go as his boys were being normal boys, until the last part hit him.

“Wait- what?! Sacrificed to who?!” His son giggled, “I don’t know, it’s only pretend, daddy.” Deciding he could no longer bear their empty stares he made them clean up the basement before spending the next 1 ½ hours cleaning off marker.

Futakuchi Kenji:

You guys had taken your 3 girls to the park to have a play-date/picnic with Aone and his wife/kids.

You were sitting and chatting away with his wife, while Aone and Futakuchi talked about their high school days, Aone gladly telling Futakuchi’s embarrassing moments.

Your youngest daughter was 3, and so far it has proven to be the worst of any age they had experienced yet.

Or rather...he had experienced yet.

For you, she was a perfect little angel, sweet and giggly, super cuddly and very much a momma’s girl.

But towards her daddy? She held nothing but malice. She would often smack him and run away to you giggling, or scrunch her nose up at him when he tried to get a hug or kiss.

You guys didn’t know what brought on this sudden hatred, but you were sure it would pass someday.

Your baby girl had waddled up to the picnic blanket and plopped herself down on your lap, playing with some nearby grass as the more adults continued to talk.

Deciding to try his luck, Futakuchi got the attention of your daughter.

“Hey, why don’t you come sit in Daddy’s lap.”

Your daughter turned towards him and shook her head, “No.”

Futakuchi pouted, “Why not?” Your little girl huffed as she only turned her head this time.

“Because I don’t even like you dada.” She then plopped her head back down on your chest while you and Mrs. Aone started laughing and Futakuchi’s face showed only pain.

“hEy! I helped make you, the least you can show me is some gratitude!” Your youngest only stuck her tongue out at him, causing an audible chuckle out of Aone and more pain for Futakuchi.

Daishou Suguru:

When you and Daishou had your first child, your daughter, you never had a hard time getting her to sleep.

But for some reason, lately she had been getting out of her bed in the middle of the night, with seemingly no reason.

Now, don’t get me wrong. Daishou loves his little girl.

But sometimes...kids can be creepy, and yours were no different.

When she woke up at these awful hours of the night, she’d just go to you guys’ room and...stand there...she wouldn’t say anything, just stand there with her teddy bear in one arm and the other hanging limply at her side.

It was almost 3 am, so naturally Daishou had long since been asleep.

He had just rolled over to the edge of the bed to grab some water when he almost screamed.

Standing right there was his daughter, just standing there, watching him.

He sat up, rubbing his eyes as he took a deep breath.

“I- go back to sleep, it’s late.” Your daughter just nodded, turned around, and walked out of your room and back into her own.

Heart still beating out of his chest he got his sip of water, laid back down and tried to go to sleep, which proved difficult with the blank stare of his child still stuck in his mind.

Numai Kazuma:

You, Numai, and your 4 children had taken a road trip as your big summer vacation.

Currently, you were all driving through this cute little town on the out skirts of one of the cities.

Two of your boys were sleeping, one reading his picture book, and your youngest and only girl was looking out the window.

You had taken a turn driving while Numai had taken a small nap, although he had woken up a little bit ago.

You guys had gotten to the outskirts of this small town, and were coming up on a cemetery.

Your daughter was 4, so she knew what a cemetery was. You guys weren’t too worried, she had grown up with 3 older brothers so things like bugs or ghost stories never really bothered her too much.

You and Numai had started talking to each other when you heard your daughter speak up.

“Hey mommy, hey daddy,” You took a peak into the rear-view mirror, your husband turning to look at his daughter.

“Yeah baby? What is it?” Your husband asked as he smiled towards his little girl.

Smiling, she turned towards the window and pointed to the cemetery.

“That’s where all the dead people are.”

Numai blinked as he just nodded and turned back around in his seat, slumping down as his eyes held a certain ‘deer in headlights’ look, slowly turning to see you as he pointed towards your daughter than to you.

“That came from your genes, not mine-” He winced when you slapped his arm, shaking your head as you too tried to erase the utter creepiness you were feeling after that.

Iizuna Tsukasa:

Iizuna yawned as he walked out of the master bedroom, having just woken up from a 3 hour nap.

Today had been a particularly intense game, which they had won, but had left him exhausted.

You were downstairs in the bathroom, working on washing the magic-marker your other children had put there off of your 10 month old baby while your 2 oldests were upstairs in time out where you left them.

Iizuna walked through the hallway, smiling as he heard his two oldests talking and playing. Or at least, it sounded like they were playing.

Recently, your oldest, your daughter who’s barely 4 and your son who just turned 2 had been bickering all the time, fighting over toys and had resorted to pinching.

When you had caught them and put them in time out, Iizuna was dead asleep, so he didn’t know his kids were supposed to be in timeout, and at the ages they were at it wasn’t unusual to see them play together.

Turning the corner his smile dropped as he sprinted towards his kids, watching in horror as his oldest pushed the middlest down the stairs, simply watching as her brother tumbled as Iizuna lost 10 years of his life.

Quickly scolding his daughter he ran down the stairs and carefully grabbed your son, who thankfully had no injuries, heart beating out of his chest as he sighed.

You, having heard tumbles and then tears, speedily rounded the corner with your now marker-free child in your arms.

It was safe to say neither of you knew how to respond to that, your oldest simply waving from the top of the stairs as Iizuna now has a significant amount of trauma.

[thissugarcane]

qaf rewatch notes, 1x15

...apparently i'm just making notes for the bdsm au I AM NOT GOING TO WRITE instead of the other canon divergent AU I HAVE TO FINISH WRITING.

anyway, 1x15 is "the ties that bind" and... is this the one where Lindsay says she's marrying the french gay? [nope, it's jack kinney and the leather ball.] I think it is. if only they'd let her..... there's ANOTHER AU I'd like to read: where lindsay goes through with the marriage (but brian keeps his parental rights and makes sure Mel gets visitation). etc.

we open with Justin in the shower, oh hotass. now I know what this one is about, it's the one where Brian finds out about his dad's cancer. oh yeah, and the leather ball!

also, wait, Lindsay is asking Brian to watch the baby. Didn't he just give her two fucking grand to pay for childcare? It's obviously a weekday since Justin is getting dressed in his uniform. fuck, nevermind, let's talk about how Brian clearly asked Justin to come over on a school night then Justin crashed. :D

Oh yeah, Dr. Dave's kid is coming by. whatever! the kid is smarter than dave and mikey, maybe I'll watch those scenes.

okay so let's talk about an AU where brian takes Justin to the leather ball and presents him with an offer of maybe, a real evening/weekend of D/s. right? or plans to, except Lindsay comes by and ruins his whole grand gesture.

also, to note: Ted's able to talk and flirt, ish, with the really hot Alpha Dale Wexler; he just does it by being self-deprecating. Oh Ted.

In the diner: Justin's smile drops when Michael's mean, even though nobody notices. also, when Justin calls someone's fetish "gross" deb immediately corrects him to "kinky". lol. also in the same conversation Brian definitely admits to fucking a guy "for a while" that liked to wear diapers. more interesting to note than him being ok with infantile play is him admitting to having a semi-steady fuck, hey?

Jack shows up and clearly he's never been there -- which probably suggests that Brian hasn't been living there aall that long, but also that Brian always goes to J. not a surprise, but.

"nonfat sugar free organic mueslix", yeah, this kid is DEFINITELY from portland.

Justin is making waffles and hand-juiced sauce for them in Deb's kitchen. something brian is gonna have to bend on in order for them to be happy together is be grateful and start to enjoy Justin's need to cook and feed people.

okay so deb is great when she thinks brian's positive, but let's note: deb doesn't hesitate to hand the baby to Justin! also justin looks so excited to look after gus!

I will die on the hill of Justin's problem / issue with Brian is less about monogamy and more about family. he wants to build and share a life and a home with the man he loves, and if he got the surety and security of that, I don't think occasional tricking in specific times and places would threaten it. there was a fic where in s5 -- maybe it's a canon scene? -- where Justin's all "if we had what those guys had, that'd be good. But we don't. They're a couple. We aren't." about the guys they have the foursome with. Like, non-monogamous or not, those guys were obviously a strong couple.

anyway, I think it was a fic. but it was good. Justin Taylor loves to cook for people he cares about, Brian is just going to have to accept that as part of their life together.

randomly, ted calling the leather ball weird is hilarious, it's not even too risque. otoh Brian coming onto Emmett with "hello big bottom, how'd you like to polish my boot with your tongue" is flat-out great. brian always appreciates emmett's efforts to be fabulous.

I forgot about the st andrew's cross scene! and Brian being like, aesthetically impressed rather than like, hot and into it.

ugh, now i'm even like "okay, so if Brian's looking for a real Dom to ask questions of in terms of getting back into the scene he could talk to Dale..." no, self! no more AUs.

interesting how uninterested brian actually is in the real leather play. he's there to watch and he's there to fuck, but he doesn't actually get much into the play itself. I mean yeah he shoves off the guy offering to take him on because of his dad's news, but even before that he's entertained, not into it. not willing to show his hand in public? or not into it?

I wonder why they never brought up Ted's foray into bdsm again? you think blake ties him up? that'd be interesting, blake venturing into domination.

So Mel has a good point about Brian putting his own needs above Gus's. But Brian also has a pretty good point about he only went out for a couple of hours and left him with Justin, who's one of the most important people to Brian.

Also David just dumps his kid on Michael as if that's okay. he really does want a wife with a dick.

the entire coversation at the diner after the leather ball where Brian tells Justin he'll tie his balls together if Justin spills to Deb: they're so cute together.

randomly: hank just said "fuck yeah!" lol this kid IS smarter and cooler than dave and mikey.

the whole conversation between jack and brian: what I don't have the capacity to write, but I always find super awesome when people pull it off, is the whole... like, Brian's remembering good stuff about his childhood and his dad along with the abuse and the bad. deb says "I know you think your dad never loved you" and he doesn't hesitate to call his dad "you selfish old prick". but he also smiles when jack mentions the bowling league. Brian doesn't just hate his dad, which is actually harder to write.

Lindsay reaming Brian out for taking care of Gus.... okay. mostly fair, Lindsay. Also while Lindsay pretends to be nice to Jack Brian's in the background with his hand on his temple-- it's hilarious, like "why is this my life". I wonder if Brian would have admitted to Jack he was a grandfather if he wasn't dying? If he didn't know there was limited damage Jack could do.

Also, I always forget that most of S1 doesn't hinge around the relationship between Brian andJustin-- like, Justin's often a minor part of it.

[jadedxrealityw]

-New Addition To The Family- Draco Malfoy x Female Reader

    ☼-☪-☼

   Kody: some fluffy Draco for the soul

   Request: Some cute fluff of Draco Y/n toddler scorp and their new baby @futuremrsmalfoy20

   House: N/A

   Possible Triggers / Warnings: children, fluffy Draco, cursing

    ☼-☪-☼

   (this story is going is not going to be long at all. Just something short and sweet)

   today was the day you would bring your infant daughter home. You had been in the hospital for two days and were just about tired of the bright fluorescent lights and terrible food. You were standing outside the large wooden door that led you into your home with Draco and Themis in a baby carrier.

   Draco had asked your mutual friend Pansy to watch Scorpius while he went to pick you up from the hospital despite her distaste towards children. Scorpius was her one exception and Themis as well. That’s why she was ‘Auntie Pans’ to Scorpius.

   “Come on, let’s show Themis her home” Draco said from beside you, lifting the baby carrier up a bit so you could see Themis’s grey eyes. They were just like Draco’s. You nod once towards him and he smiles back at you. You reach for the handle and push the door open.

   you are met with the sight of Pansy holding Scorpius in her arms staring back at you- but they weren’t the only ones there. Next to Pans was Theo and Blaise. “Welcome home Themis!” they all exclaimed in unison. You burst into a fit of laughter.

   “I thought you two were busy?” you ask, referring to the couple Blaise and Theo. You had wanted them to meet Themis at the hospital, but they told you they had been behind in work that they needed to catch up on. “Surprise, we lied. Pansy planned for us all to be here on a certain day.” Blaise informs.

   you nod once and turn your E/c eyes toward Pansy. She shrugs nonchalantly and walks over to you “Take this snot rocket” she says in mock disgust while handing you Scorpius who held his arms out wide as soon as he saw your face “Mommy!” 

   scooping him up in your arms, you turn your body towards Draco who was placing the baby carrier on the table so he could undo the buckle around Themis. “Daddy’s here too” you say and Scorpius giggles in response. He had yet to say the word dad, daddy, or any variation of that word. 

   Blaise, Theo, and Pansy both look over Draco’s shoulder “Finally, another girl around. We girls have been surrounded by testerone for years” Pansy comments. Draco shakes his head as he undoes the last buckle “Love you too Pans” he replies. She gives him a half smile.

   “She looks like Y/n more then Draco” Theo points out, gesturing towards her face. Themis did indeed have more of your facial structure then her fathers, while Scorpius was a spitting image of your husband. “I thought they cloned Draco when i first saw Scorpius” Blaise adds, making Theo and Pansy snicker.

   Draco rolls his eyes, lifting Themis from the baby carrier “I did not clone myself” he retorts. Pansy grins widely “Yeah guys. Scorpius is like bright and cheery and you were a little shit when you were a kid” You hold back laughter as you realize what’s coming next.

   “Wait until my father hears about this!” all three of them say before going into laughing fits. Draco seemed unamused to say the least “I hate you all. Also Pansy you can’t curse around Scorpius, he repeats everything he hears. Pansy rolled her eyes “Everything, but Daddy huh?”

   “ha ha ha. So comical, i’m putting Themis in her room” Draco held Themis’s head with his hand before leaving the room and down the hallway. All of you turned to follow Draco as well and into the nursery. Themis’s room was a mix of  green, black, and white. 

    ☼-☪-☼

   a week later

   you had almost forgotten how newborns love to wake you up in the middle of the night with crying and screaming. Wear protection kids. As you slept peacefully in your shared bed, you heard the wailing of your infant daughter. You shot up instantly. 

   Draco had his arm around you, so he was yanked up as well. Poor dude. “What the fuck- are you alright Y/n?!” he shouts, assuming the worst. You look at his worried expression. His platinum blond hair was a sticking out everywhere, making him look like a goof.

   you held back a laugh “Sorry hun, Themis is crying i have to go check up on her-” as you spoke you then heard the crying of your other child Scorpius. Draco sighs with a small smile “I’ll check on Scorpius then, meet you back here?” he said, like you both were going on a mission. It was sweet.

   you nod once. Draco slithers his hand behind your head to rest on the nape of your neck, pulling your face close to his. He leans in a kisses you sweetly. It only lasted a couple seconds, but you enjoyed it very much. “Alright” you say and both of you crawl out of bed. 

    ☼-☪-☼

   you walk out the bedroom door and turn to the left while Draco turns to the right. When you get closer you notice that the nursery door is open and you vividly remember closing it so the light from the hallway wouldn’t shine on Themis’s face and wake her up.

   an uneasy feeling invaded your stomach as you approached the door. You push the rest of the door open and spot a strange sight. Scorpius was sitting in Themis’s crib holding her delicate head in his lap. They were both crying. What in the hell?

   “Scorpius?” you say, nearing the crib. He looks up at you and points to Themis “Help” he cried out, making your heart tug. Who would want to see there baby cry- well both babies. You reach into the crib and lift Themis out. As soon as you grab her, you notice that the diaper she was wearing was full.

   before you could even speak to Scorpius Draco comes busting into the room at full speed with his wand “I can’t find Scorpius! I looked around the house and every other room! I know that you told me that if i ever lost one of the kids you would leave me, but i don’t even know how to use that thing in the kitchen!”

   you bought a dishwasher 

   slowly moving to the side, you reveal Scorpius in the crib. Draco’s face that once was distraught was now revealed “Oh thank merlin” he breathed out, practically sinking onto the floor. It was kind of amusing. “Are you okay?” you ask, walking over to the changing station that was in the corner. 

   he stood up slowly “My whole life flashed before my eyes” he spoke, making you snort out a chuckle at the dramatic way of speaking. You lay Themis down and began to remove her onesie. “And?” you question. “Please don’t leave me. I know i was a little shit back in school, but i like to think i’ve grown”

   “You have. I’m not going to leave you, you goof now go console your son please” you say, turning you head to give him a side glance before going back to changing Themis. Draco nods and walks over to the crib “Hey little one” he said as he reached into the crib.

   Scorpius held out his arms, grabbing onto Draco as soon as he picked him up “Now why were you in here Scorp?” Draco questions with a small pout. “I think he was trying to help Themis, but didn’t know how” you said, putting a new diaper onto Themis.

   Draco smiled brightly, poking at Scorpius’s stomach playfully “I’m glad he’s already trying to help his sister like a good big brother” he praises. Scorpius’s frown turned into a bright smile and giggles cutely. Super adorable. “Just like you, super protective” you say, lifting Themis from the table.

   Draco rolls his eyes “I’m not super protective” he snaps back. You raise a brow at what he just said “You punched Harry in the face when he was wiping dust off my robe” you say and watch as Draco begins to sputter “I thought he was grabbing your ass okay? what was is supposed to do?”

   “Not punch him?”

   “Well-” He closed his mouth, unable to come up with anything to say “Whatever” he mumbles. You smile and walk towards the loveseat in the corner of the room “Alright i need to feed her. Can you take Scorpius back to bed for me?” you ask.

   Draco shrugged “It’s not like i haven’t seen those before” He said, referring to your breast. You narrow your eyes, something that scared Draco. “Okay okay. Scorpius say goodnight to mommy” he crouched down next you. Scorpius grabs your face with his tiny hands and kisses your cheek “Mwah!”

   you chuckle at his super cute behaviour. He gives you a toothy grin “G’night mommy!” he speaks and your heart just melts “Goodnight Scorpius”

    ☼-☪-☼

   the next morning

   you awoke to the sound of children's laughter, which was pretty sweet to wake up to in hindsight. You sit up in your bed and turn to face Draco, but he wasn’t there. Strange sense it was a weekend and Draco was usual the one to sleep in on these days. 

   deciding to investigate you pull the black duvet off of your body and push yourself to sit up. As soon as your straightened your back you smelt something- delicious. You couldn’t decipher what, but it smells wonderful. So wonderful that your stomach began to rumble. 

   you throw your legs over the side of the bed. You stand up, the air nipping at your skin and causing goosebumps. You look around and spot your light grey hoodie you had gotten from Pansy and slip it over your sports bra and black and white flannel pants.

    you let out a yawn as you walk across the cold hard wood floor that lined the hallway. it was definitely too early considering there were no signs of Narcissa. She usually stayed over on weekends to watch the kids so you and Draco could go do something together- but you both ended up just sleeping in. 

   children tire you out like that 

   as you made your way to the stairs the children's laughter got louder and closer. Was everybody downstairs? You start to walk down the steps, rubbing the tired feeling away from your eyes. Once you reach the last step you turn the corner to see a very- funny view.

   Scorpius was sat in his booster seat munching on food while Themis was in her cradle, shaking around a toy hippogriff that Pansy had gotten her as a joke. You named it ‘Chicken’. It is just as funny as Scorpius’s stuffed white ferret that she also got him. His name is ‘Dray’

   Pansy is a great aunt

   After looking at that you see Draco at your kitchen stove frying up what looked like sausages. “Draco?” you spoke and watched your platinum blond husband almost trip over his own feet in shock. Once he turned around you noticed he was wearing a apron that had a floral pattern on it. It was Narcissa’s.

   he musters up a smile as he leans against the counter, spatula in hand “Hey there darling. How did you sleep?” he asked and you shrug, smiling “Just fine- um, what’s all this?” you question, making your way around the table. He smiles and turns back to the pan. 

   “Breakfast” he states confidently. You look at the table and notice all the food, eggs, toast, jam, hash browns. It was impressive, but suspicious “Since when can you cook? You almost burnt the house down when i asked you to boil noodles”

   he rolls his eyes as he plates the sausages on a plate “Mother has been coming over early to teach me so i could be a ‘proper husband’ as she says. Plus you cook for us all the time and with the new baby i felt you needed a break” he explains. 

   Draco grabs your hand and lifts it to his mouth. He kisses your knuckles lightly which made you smile “Thank you Draco” you say. He sends you a wink before placing the plate with all the other food “Now eat before it gets cold” he adds. You nod and go over to sit down next to Scorpius’s booster seat.

   you look at what he was eating and notice he was chewing on french toast. You look up at him and grab his tiny pale hand “Now who made you that delicious food?” you ask in a playful manner. Scorpius gets visibly excited and points his other hand at Draco.

   “Daddy!”

   you and Draco both freeze. The one word Scorpius refused to say was just spoken. You look over at Draco and notice his expression falter before a big smile came to his face “Yes! Pansy owes me galleons!” he shouts excitedly. You shake your head considering he was already insanely wealthy.

   but he probably just wanted to prove Pansy wrong. “That’s what your thinking about?” you ask. Draco looks at you and shakes his head, walking over “Not just that. I’m very happy. I’m happy that Scopius said dad and I’m happy that i have a healthy children” he spoke before crouching down beside you.

   “and i’m happy that i have a beautiful wife that stuck around for so long. Even with all my family issues and shitty attitude” Draco looks up at you with a loving smile. What a cheesy dork you thought. You lean down and he follows along as you both kiss. It was short and sweet, but you cherished it nonetheless. 

   “Now sit in a seat so we can eat” you spoke, pulling back from him

   he stands up and takes a seat next to you and Themis’s cradle “Yes ma’am”

    ☼-☪-☼

   Taglist: @the--queen-of-hell @sonbelleame @dracosathenaeum @pxroxide-prinxcesss 

    ☼-☪-☼

   Kody: I hope you enjoyed this short Draco fluff, it was fun to write. My requests are open as well as my taglist. Anyways, peace. 

[pilmik]

No better way to start a writing blog than by writing something completely self indulgent lmao college students this might hit too close to home but in my defense the new sem started and I'm. Mess

Gen: angst ig???some fluff? hurt/comfort? Quite literally just me writing what I want to hear

CW: insecurities, negative thoughts

Wakatoshi loves volleyball

Everyone knows this

Ever since he was little, he's lived and breathed for the sport

There's nothing better to him than the feeling of the ball hitting his hand, the adrenaline rush of a scored point, the satisfaction of a game well won

He didn't get this far on enjoyment alone though

As his s/o, you know this better than anyone, save for his coaches and teammates of course

You know the effort he's put in, you know that for every second he shines on the court in front he's spent hours practicing alone or with his teammates

And he shines on the court

Watching him play will never fail to make your heart stutter and your lungs feel like they're not getting enough air

After being with him as long as you have, you know enough about volleyball to know that Wakatoshi is something special

His speed, his strength, his reliability

No matter how many times you see that spike, the sound of the ball hitting the floor stays deafening

Wakatoshi was made to play Volleyball. It's an objective fact. Sometimes you think that the sport loves him just as much as he loves it

Sometimes, you get so jealous you could scream

one of the perks of being the volleyball captain's s/o is that you always get the best seats

You watch front row as your boyfriend leads his team to victory, and he always leads them to victory.

You watch, time and time again, as he scores the match point, that sharp wham of the ball hitting the court that sings triumph

Wakatoshi isn't the most expressive person. When his team wins a game, most people would write off his impassive face as nonchalance or as vanity, thinking maybe he's won so many times it doesn't feel like anything for him anymore

But you know him. You know that if you look hard enough at the end of a game, you can see a gleam in his eyes. A gleam that somehow means both satisfaction and hunger

Because while at the end of every game means victory, the end of every game also means the start of a new one, a new challenge, a new opportunity to be on the court. He loves every second of it

You know you're probably the worst person on the world for feeling this way about someone you love, but every time you see that gleam in his eyes, any pride and happiness you feel on his behalf is stained with resentment and an envy so bitter it stays on your tongue for days

You've never had that gleam in your eyes. You've never loved something so entirely, so completely as Wakatoshi loves volleyball

You honestly doubt you ever will

It's not like you're talentless or you don't have hobbies, you have the things you're good at and you have the things you like to do but it's not the same

You want so desperately to know what he feels like, to be doing something and to think, I could do this for the rest of my life and die happy

on your worst days, you wonder why he stays by your side at all

You watch him play, surrounded by his court and his team (no the court or the team, his.) And you wonder what he could get from you that he couldn't get from the sting of the ball on his palm, or the squeak of his shoes on hardwood

He's brilliant, wherever he goes be burns so brightly you swear he leaves scorch marks. What could a forest fire possibly want from a candle?

You watch them play a game against some college team, they win straight sets and Wakatoshi dominated the court, scoring a majority of the points. you're quiet on your way home, and he asks if you were bored by the game

You immediately tell him no, because on most days you love seeing him play, and you try and explain how you feel

He doesn't understand what you're talking about, obviously

Contrary to what most people think, your boyfriend isn't stupid or dense. He has trouble understanding different social cues and conceptualizing some of the more complicated emotions other people feel, but he's not an idiot

But these specific insecurities are something he's never had to face. For him, it's been volleyball since the start. His earliest memories are of his father in the yard, tossing a blue and yellow ball into the air while he sits on the engawa, chubby hands holding tight to a pink vabo-chan plush

It doesn't make sense to him, if you don't have anything like that, then all you need to do is find something you're good at, correct? Then you'll be happy

He tells you this, in his usual matter-of-fact way. (you can imagine how that went)

He doesn't understand why your eyes go glassy, or why you tell him you'll be fine walking by yourself for the rest of the way

But he does understand that he's made you upset, and he knows that he never wants to look into your eyes and see tears that he's put there

As he walks back to his dorm, he's wracking his brain trying to make sense of how you told him you felt, and what he said in response

He's still thinking as he enters the doorway, ignoring Tendou's greeting as he neatly removes his runners and puts them away

This, of course, alerts his redheaded friend, knowing Wakatoshi was taught to mind his manners

He leaves whatever he was doing to see him at the entrance, taking in his pinched expression. He knows that Wakatoshi walks you home after every game, and it doesn't take a genius to connect the dots

He quickly presses the pad of his thumb between Wakatoshi's furrowed eyebrows, smoothing the lines there

"trouble in paradise, Wakatoshi-kun? You can't keep frowning like that you know, you'll get wrinkles! Everyone already thinks you're an old man"

Wakatoshi trusts his best friend, even if he teases him constantly. Besides you, Tendou is his main confidant

He explains what happened much like someone would explain a mission report, in perfect unbiased detail. He tell him what you said, how he thought and responded and your reaction. Tendou is always patient with him, giving him his full attention.

After he finishes his story, his friend sits on his haunches in the middle of the hallway for a few minutes, pointer finger to his chin, head cocked and eyes to the ceiling, hmmmmmming thoughtfully

Wakatoshi waits at the entrance of their dorm room until Tendou snaps his eyes away from the ceiling and onto him

"Wakatoshi kun, I'm going to need you to imagine something for me"

His eyebrows pinch together again, but he nods

"Imagine you never played volleyball, you're exactly the same in every way, except your dad never showed you so you never learned how to play. Try and imagine who you'd be"

Wakatoshi tries his best to imagine, he replaces the blue and yellow ball in his memory with a red one, the bouncy kind they sell in bins at the grocery store. He replaces vabo-chan with some kind of stuffed animal wearing a bow

He thinks about school, about going straight home after class is over, and going to the gym only on weekends

He finds he's skipping parts of his life in large gaps, empty spaces he doesn't know what to do with, his future completely blank. It's terrifying.

Tendou must see the dawning horror on his face because he jumps up quickly with a flourish, clapping his hands together once to draw Wakatoshi out of his daydream

Tendou looks at him, smiling and says "y/n-chan doesn't have their volleyball. Most people aren't as lucky as you, finding your volleyball so early Wakatoshi-kun. Some people never find their's at all"

He stands at the entrance quietly for awhile after Tendou returns to his room, thinking about how scary it felt to imagine, even for a few minutes, his life full of the blanks that his sport filled

He wonders how it would be like to have those blanks empty all the time, with not even a clue how to complete them

Swallowing his pride, Wakatoshi realizes he wouldn't be able to live like that. Wouldn't be able to go forward into such unknowable territory, under such impossible odds

He thinks about you waking up every day, seeing your life full of blanks, and still pushing forwards despite it

He doesn't get much sleep that night.

You wake up in the morning to Wakatoshi's text ringtone

7:10am Toshi <3: Call in sick for first period.

7:10am Toshi <3: I am going to pick you up at 8.

7:13am Toshi <3: I will bring you breakfast.

7:27am Toshi <3: Wear a light jacket, it's chilly.

The half of you that's still hurt over yesterday wants to tell him to shove breakfast up his ass, but then you realise something

You stare at your phone, deeply confused

Doesn't he have volleyball practice before school?

You get ready quickly, and sure enough, when you walk out of your door at exactly 8:00, Wakatoshi is there.

He's wearing his tracksuit and runners, and he hands you a paper bag from the conbini. There's an apple, a bag of grapes and onigiri. In his other hand he's holding a warm drink, written on the lid is your favourite, exactly how you like it

"I am taking you to the park."

You tilt your head up at him, confused

"don't you have volleyball practice?"

"I'm skipping. We are going to feed the ducks."

The idea of Ushijima Wakatoshi skipping volleyball practice stuns you into silence, and you simply follow his lead to the direction of the park, you walking and him doing some sort of ridiculous exercise thing that looks like it'd make you puke

When you get there, you're happy to find that your usual bench is empty.

Wakatoshi pulls a water bottle out of his ridiculously-deep men's tracksuit pockets while you take the bunch of grapes out of the bag, neatly dividing it in half. You decide to take the big half of the grape bunch for once, because he was being a jerk yesterday and you deserve to feed the ducks more than he does. You give him his half and you both start feeding the ducks in silence

After awhile, he decides to speak

"Tendou made me imagine something yesterday"

You turn to face him, but he's still looking at the ducks

"he told me to imagine my life if I'd never played volleyball"

He frowns

"he said to imagine everything about me was the same, except I never started playing. I found that it was difficult"

"there were many things I found I couldn't fill in, both in my life and in myself"

"but the worst part was imagining the future. I couldn't imagine a single thing to put in it"

"I wouldn't be able to live like that. To live every day and see blank spaces and uncertainties. It sounds terrible"

He pauses for a moment and you're like :/ wow king thanks for the pep talk

But he takes a deep breath and he continues

"I think, for a person to face that uncertainty and keep pushing forward, they would have to be exceptional"

Your head snaps to look at him so fast you almost get whiplash

Exceptional

There's a word that you've never used to describe yourself

"I think, that if I knew someone like that, I would tell them that they are strong in a way that I doubt I will ever be"

He finally turns to look at you, and you try your best to see him through the tears distorting your vision

"after awhile of thinking, I finally thought of something that I could put in that blank future. Would you like to know what it was?"

You just nod, not trusting your words. His big hands gently engulf your own and for a moment you're absolutely certain Ushijima Wakatoshi will be the death of you

"if I didn't have Volleyball, if I didn't have a single clue of what I could do with my future, if I still had you by my side, I think I would be alright"

One hit K.O.

He keeps going though, as if he didn't just kill you

"if you would have me, I'd like to be in your blank future. For as long as it takes for you to find your volleyball, I'll be there. If it's months or years or decades,"

"if decades pass and you never find your volleyball, I would still like to stay by your side. Maybe your volleyball is looking for volleyball?"

His face contorts in consideration of the idea, and you can't help but laugh wetly, your tears soaking into his jacket as you bury your face into his arm

He presses a soft kiss to your head

"I apologize for what I said last night. I didn't understand"

You only shake your head

You two sit in companionable silence for a little longer so you can eat your breakfast, then you both walk to second period hand in hand

It's only in the boredom of your math class that you realize the gravity of what your boyfriend had said to you in the park

11:08 you: Tendou

11:08 you: was I tripping

11:08 you: or did Wakatoshi /propose/ to me in the park today

Tendou is typing......

A/N: I've never posted this kind of stuff before so comments would really be appreciated! Like if there's something I could do to make my stuff easier to read or whatever I wanna hear it! Even if it's mean I promise I'll only cry a little

[arambleaway]

Lets pretend the lack of Phoenix backstory isn't a logical mechanical choice and instead treat it as a facet of the character because I think it has interesting implications. I saw a post that I can't find because I'm an idiot that mentioned how odd it really was in a story context that we never hear or see anything about his family and given my personal bias I have some thoughts. So. Treating it as a story feature. Lets begin.

I am extrapolating my ideas from a couple places. The first being that 1) Phoenix never really mentions his family so something happened to cause them to no longer be a part of each others' lives. 2) There is a seeming lack of grief and no mention even while on trial for murder in college. 3) Phoenix does not, to my eye, appear to hold the hallmarks of people growing up in an abusive household. But 4) He latches who he is onto other people with worrying intensity.

I'm merging these facts with my own belief that Phoenix is trans (disprove me I dare you) and my own observations as to what Phoenix is like as a parent. Also the fact that his name is Phoenix. Because honestly. So anyway. My conclusions are thus:

Phoenix is trans, but he didn't pick his name. He was named Phoenix at birth by his exceedingly law-hating hippie parents, which seems to be a popular idea from my narrow exposure. My view is that he was one of those kids that was like 7 and just knew. (Bastards. I love them but ugh. I wish) So Phoenix's parents being the amazingly supportive people they were, immediately swapped pronouns and even relocated him to another school so that he could have a fresh start without having to deal with a bunch of questions. The absolute bastard of a teacher nearly wrecks that (diatribe for another post) but Miles and Larry are enough to make them keep Phoenix in place because of how much the two mean to him.

Huh, guess this means Larry and Miles don't know about the trans thing. And even though they like Miles for hanging with Phoenix they aren't thrilled about Miles's hyperfixation. I bet it would be like when you go to a friends house they try to feed you except whenever Miles is over its like "try art!" or "have you ever thought of opening a business?" You could probably have some funny shenanigans as Miles, Larry, and Phoenix try to follow these kinds of suggestions in the most... them way possible.

So Phoenix's parents are super supportive throughout his childhood even reaching out to get him Miles's address though they aren't thrilled about Miles's Dad's job. Probably part of why Phoenix didn't know anything about Miles vanishing is that his parents didn't exactly care enough to ask.

A note though before moving into the reasons for the rift, are that while Phoenix's parents were super supportive, it was in a very hands off way. I'll get back to this.

So college comes around and Phoenix wants to take some law classes. Which his parent just are not thrilled or happy about. To the point where its like: fine, but we aren't going to pay for them. And then Phoenix sees Miles in the Paper and they are just... appalled. They refuse to pay for anymore of Phoenix's college and spend a rather taxing weekend trying to convince him to go back into art and trying to tell Phoenix that swapping majors for a man is ridiculous and law is nothing for a good sort like him. Oh. hehe, just had the thought that this is when Phoenix first watches Legally Blonde and it does the exact opposite of what his parents were hoping.

So they are arguing and by the end of the weekend they, honestly rather cordially, tell Phoenix that he is their son and they love him but cannot condone his choice. And he can take what he likes from his things in the house. They'll keep it all for him so that he can have it there when he comes to his senses and finds a decent career. But until then, it would be best if they didn't see him. Thus, Phoenix goes back to university heartbroken and seriously questioning if he made the right choice. (He probably watches Legally Blonde more than he'll admit.)

Then Dahlia comes along and the worst possible moment, and he is absolutely gone because he is craving that validation affection offers and hey law must be good for something because the courthouse brought him his darling Dollie. He latches all his insecurity and worry into the idea of loving and being loved by Dahlia/Iris. Which then makes his defense of her make more sense to my demi brain because I cannot comprehend that level of dumbassery for love. Just personally. It also makes sense because he absolutely latches onto Edgeworth after the trial because doing so is safe in a sense. Edgeworth can't hurt him because he isn't there and even if they are saying he is evil, Phoenix can save him after all he proved law wasn't evil, he can prove Miles isn't either. Or actually, he has to prove Miles isn't evil because if he doesn't then his parents were right and he fucked up is a massive way. So it goes.

The parent thing though! Swooping back around to the whole independent, hands off style of parenting, I really strongly believe in that being how he grew up because that is exactly how he is with Trucy. People will emulate their parents' good parts when parenting themselves, so I think he really emulates that part of how he grew up. He trusts her to act independently and lets her have her space. But he is very clearly always there for her no matter what. (which ties into everything above see? Occasionally i have maybe a sense i know something about what I'm writing.)

So yeah. My zigzagging thoughts on why Phoenix is the way he is and the family he comes from. I guess just a last note is I don't think they ever reconcile. Especially not after the disbarment. They would see the news and just... crumple because they knew it, their darling son has been corrupted. Oh. ouch. They see that and empty out his room. And Phoenix sees it all sitting outside when he goes to try and talk to them. Oof. Oh. Why do I hurt myself like this. Maybe they even fucking move. They treat it like the death of a child and just leave. So Phoenix doesn't actually know where they are. Which might also contribute to the whole 7 years of depression he goes through. Ughh. Now I wanna think about that. NO. I have other shit that popped up. Later ramble, later.