#so i have no real idea what they're doing
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thydungeongal · 2 days ago
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So there is a pretty clear shift in playstyle between TSR D&D and WotC D&D: for better and for worse, D&D 3e introduced the idea of encounter balance, de-emphasized mechanics that had previously encouraged the GM to think of the monsters as real living creatures (reaction rolls, morale, etc.), and it had the effect of making D&D a much more combat-focused game. D&D has always been a game that's opinionated about combat, it's basically the most expressive and detailed form of play regardless of edition, but combat in the TSR editions was not exactly zoomed in and tactical. The WotC editions purposefully made combat zoomed in, granular, and tactical.
And this has had an effect on playstyle: since combat is now the main form of player expression what players actually want is for their characters to get into combat. Because combat is the most fun part of the game. But the game has also changed from the largely amoral dungeon-crawling game into a game of fantasy heroics (even though a lot of the trappings of the amoral dungeon-crawling still remain, which contributes to the dissonance), so you can't just have the player characters going into combat for the sake of it. That would frame the player characters as kind of Fucked Up, and we can't have that in our supposedly heroic fantasy.
What you end up with is a variety of contrivances like "they're bandits," "they're cultists," or, my all-time favorite, "they attacked first" to make the action seem morally justifiable, even though gameplay is still motivated by a desire to fight. The monsters fight to the death and, importantly, can often not be reasoned and negotiated with, partly because combat is supposed to be the fun, engaging part everyone is here to do, but also because if they actually acted like reasonable people it could cause dissonance with the whole "the player characters are the goodest heroes."
As my friend @tenleaguesbeneath once called it: what is actually going on is that the player characters are hunting people and monsters who have been programmed to fight to the death and never negotiate for sport, while justifying it as self-defence.
It's a simple power fantasy, and I don't think there's anything wrong with it. Sometimes you want to play a morally uncomplicated game about killing guys with cool magic swords. But I think it's also fun to think about what the specific types of monsters players end up fighting reveals about Society the invisible, unexamined ideology lying under the surface that the designers of even modern D&D have failed to examine. And to me it often reads like a frontier justice fantasy. None of that is to detract from anyone's joy of the game, and for me it's just fun to think about and post about this stuff while Still Enjoying the Game, but if someone expressing that opinion makes you feel uncomfortable, why? That's pretty silly imo.
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thewriteadviceforwriters · 2 days ago
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Do you have any tips on how characters react after a heat in the moment first kiss?
Hey there! I'm so glad you reached out about depicting characters' reactions after an unexpected first kiss. This is such an important and tricky moment to get right in any romance story.
I don't talk enough about romance, so I've very excited to write a blog post about this, especially since in almost all my writing projects I utilize a romantic subplot.
Understanding the Emotional Impact
First things first, it's important to recognize just how powerful and transformative that first kiss can be for your characters, even if it's spur-of-the-moment or unplanned. A kiss like that has the power to shift the entire dynamic between two people, unlocking a whole new level of vulnerability, intimacy, and emotional intensity.
Think about it - your characters have probably been building up tension, attraction, and unspoken feelings for each other over time. And then, in one electric moment, all of that comes bubbling to the surface. Suddenly, everything changes. The world seems to slow down, and all that matters is the connection between them.
Whether your characters have been pining for this moment or it takes them completely by surprise, that first touch of their lips is guaranteed to trigger a whirlwind of emotions. Excitement, nervousness, relief, uncertainty - it's a veritable emotional rollercoaster.
And of course, the way each character responds will depend on their individual personality, past experiences, and overall mindset. A shy, cautious character might be utterly flustered and overwhelmed. A bold, adventurous one might be thrilled and eager for more. And someone with trust issues or a painful romantic history might panic and pull away.
The key is to really get inside your characters' heads and hearts, understanding how this monumental moment resonates with them on a deep level. That's what's going to make their reactions feel raw, authentic, and achingly real for your readers.
Crafting Nuanced Reactions
(The examples I use are very cliche, and personally not my writing style, but they're simply for your reference to get a rough idea of what I'm trying to indicate)
Okay, now that we've established the emotional gravity of that first kiss, let's dive into some specific techniques for portraying your characters' reactions. Here are a few ideas:
Focus on the sensations. When a character experiences something as intense as an unexpected first kiss, their physical responses are going to be heightened. Capture the racing heartbeat, the trembling hands, the tingling skin - all those little visceral details that make the moment palpable.
For example (Very cliche but, just for reference): "Her lips were soft and warm against his, sending a shiver down his spine. His heart pounded in his ears, fingers trembling as he cupped her cheek, hardly daring to breathe."
Showcase their inner turmoil. Don't just describe what's happening externally - give us a window into your character's jumbled thoughts and feelings. Are they overjoyed? Confused? Terrified? Let us see the full emotional spectrum unfolding.
Like this: "Panic rose in her chest as his lips met hers, every nerve ending firing at once. What was happening? This couldn't be real - it had to be some kind of dream. But the way her skin tingled, the way her stomach fluttered, told her this was very much reality."
Use body language and subtle reactions. Characters don't always have to respond with grand, over-the-top gestures. Sometimes the most meaningful reactions come through in the little, unconscious movements - a shy glance, a gentle touch, a subtle smile.
For instance: "For a long moment, they simply stared at each other, frozen. Then, slowly, a smile tugged at the corners of her lips, eyes sparkling with a mix of wonder and delight."
Lean into the awkwardness. First kisses, even magical ones, can also be a little clumsy and uncertain. Embrace that sense of fumbling vulnerability - it makes the moment all the more endearing and relatable.
Something like: "Their noses bumped as they leaned in, hearts racing. He hesitated, suddenly unsure, but then her hand slid around the back of his neck, pulling him closer. Their lips met in a tentative, exploratory kiss that sent tingles down his spine."
Contrast reactions between characters. If you have two characters with very different personalities or perspectives, lean into that contrast to create compelling dramatic tension. How might a guarded, cynical character react compared to an optimistic romantic?
For example: "She froze, eyes wide with shock. This was the last thing she'd expected - to be kissed by her best friend, of all people. Panic fluttered in her chest, desperate to pull away. But then she saw the vulnerability in his gaze, the slight tremble in his hands, and her heart melted. Slowly, hesitantly, she kissed him back."
The key is to get creative, have fun, and be able to let your characters' unique voices and perspectives shine through.
Additional Resources
And of course, don't hesitate to reach out if you have any other questions! I'm always happy to chat more about anything writing related.
--Rin T.
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jamethinks · 1 day ago
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Since Yor and Loid both work very dangerous jobs they have picked a few quirks in relation to safety. Their ideas of what's a normal thought process are a bit warped. But because they're so close it never really strikes them as odd
-
*Twilight and Yor enter a new building*
Loid: There are approximately 15 exits to the exterior, including windows
Yor: 20 security workers. Some are posing as wait staff. No guns only tasers
Loid: No. The head one has a gun. Small discrete. It's probably a pistol. My best guess is that he's not supposed to have it.
Yor: right. I think that table in the north east is our safest bet.
Loid: I said the same thing. Best escape route. Can accommodate moving Anya with ease
Anya: I just wanted to meet bondman.
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*Twilight showing Yor around a house they want to buy*
Loid: below the basement there's a secret cellar. There's also a tunnel that leads all the way to the garage at the back of the property so we can easily escape
Yor: that's nice but I am concerned about Anya. I don't want her to come down here and play and get stuck by accident.
Loid: ywah, I'm gonna have to work out the mechanics of it. Need it be discrete but also not easy for kids to play around with. Will take a minute
Yor: that's fine. But I do love having a cellar. Nice a spacious and soundproof.
Loid: you could kill someone down here and no one would know
Yor: exactly.
-
*Yor comes back from visiting Melinda's house and is discussing it with Loid*
Yor: the house is such a maze. If you wanted to break in you're gonna need a map
Loid: what's the security like
Yor: surprisingly light on the inside. You would be good once you're inside but getting inside is the real struggle.
Yor: I must say the landscaping is a great desception. You'd think it would be easy to break in and use the foliage as cover, but it's so noisy it would alert anyone.
Loid: *chuckles* those Desmonds really have a way with security huh
-
*watching a horror movie*
Yor, watching a man get chopped up: that's so anatomically incorrect
Loid: that's way to much blood for such a shallow cut
Yor: you only get that kind of spray for a jugular
Loid: There's no way they didn't get caught with all that stomping they've been doing
Loid: that's not how a silencer works
Yor: look at that bullet wound. That's way to big for the type of bullets they were using
Loid: The exit wound is the same size, too. Seriously, who directed this?
-
*Twilight about to teach Anya how to shoot a gun*
Yor: loid what the hell are you doing?
Loid: look ok she's needs to be able to defend herself against intruders. The stabbing and hand to hand combat rely on her being in close proximity. Guns are vest for long range
Yor:
Yor: fine. But we are not showing her how to use a shot gun. It's way to heavy. Trying a pistol.
Loid: No. Too small. It'll be harder for her to get a good shot in. Shot guns can be propped up so she won't have to carry it. Plus, they're way more socially acceptable to have in the house
Anya: Becky's probably playing dress up right now...
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therealbeachfox · 18 hours ago
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"Why do we make laser grids like these?" came the chirp from across the table.
"What do you mean?" Otto responded without looking up.
"I mean, instead of a messy random arrangement of lasers that a nimble intruder might be able to jump through, why not a simple grid wall with no gaps large enough to allow a person to pass?"
Otto sighed heavily and looked up from the blueprints he'd been amending and reworking to focus on his nephew. One of his nephews. One of his multitude of nephews because none of his siblings understood the concept of wrapping it up. He was at Mykola's place, so probably one of his. Too young to be Aiden, too old to be Eric. A, B, C... Connor? Conway? Conrad? One of those. At that extra annoying age where they're too curious for their own good, and have started to believe they actually know something, so get real argumentative about it when you prove they don't.
There's a reason why Otto didn't have kids. Or deal with kids. And tried to talk the Boss out of putting kids into his deathtraps. Fucking kids. Ugh.
"Because if we did that, it'd be impossible to get through." he said, hoping it'd satisfy the kid.
"But isn't that what you're trying to do?" Mykola's boy had his head twisted around to try and look at the blueprints from his uncle's perspective and was tracing out the twisting pathways with his eyes. "This whole thing is a giant 'You Can't Get In Here' tunnel. I don't understand why you're leaving holes in the security."
Well, the kid had actually asked, instead of just flat out stating that his way would be better. Otto grit his teeth and settled himself back for a proper lecture. "You're thinking too mundanely, kid." The boy looked up curiously and brushed a tangle of near-black hair out of his eyes. Slightly mollified, Otto continued. "This isn't like designing security for a bank or vault or something. This is something for my Boss. So we're already not designing like we would for the public sector, right?"
"Yeah? Yeah." Con-whatever agreed, though still looking just as confused.
"So, our issue is, whoever comes looking for whatever it is that the Boss is gonna put at the end of this is already going to be uniquely skilled and driven. Not just your average jewelry robbers or beat cops, right?"
"Right, yeah, you're going to be dealing with capes or cowls and stuff, sure. But wouldn't that mean you'd want it all extra locked down?" The kid was now looking directly at him. But with the intense look of someone who didn't understand but wanted to. It was by far more annoying than if the kid had just been flat-out disparaging of the whole process. Now Otto couldn't just tell him to shove off without feeling bad about it. Ugh.
"Well, here's the thing. If this was something the Boss really wanted to keep away from people, he'd have it put in some indistinguishable bank vault lock-box by a patsy that one of us underlings had hired through a third party, leaving two whole layers unaware of who even wanted the thing in there, and at least three whole layers who have no idea what the object even is besides. But he's not doing that, he's putting it at the end of a long tunnel of traps, alarms, and obstacles. Which means, what he wants is for whoever's coming after him to go through the whole thing. Which means it's gotta be at least theoretically possible to get through the whole thing. If you were a cowl and you came across a perfect laser grid that there was no way to squirm your way through and no way to work around, what would you do?"
Mykola's kid frowned down at the blueprints, eyebrows furrowed in tweenage concentration. "Start cutting through the walls, I guess. Either to find a way to cut the power, or to bypass the tunnel all toget-OH! Ooooooh, okay! I see, I see!" Otto grabbed the edge of the table to steady it as the kid started bouncing a little in his seat. "If you make it impossible, the cowls will start thinking outside the box and start looking for ways to end-run around the whole thing. If you make it difficult, but still possible, they're going to be too busy focusing on how to do the almost impossible thing so they're still playing by your Boss' rules instead of making up their own!"
Otto grunted and bit back the hint of a smile that wanted to cross his lips. Last thing he wanted to do was encourage the brat; then he'd be stuck answering questions all day. "Now you've got it. Make it hard enough that they waste as much time getting through it as possible without breaking out their bat-themed metal cutters or retreating and finding another way to come in altogether. Same reason why museums do it this way. Otherwise, the only way to get at shit would be to blow a hole in the floor, and that'd damage way more artifacts than whatever the thief was targeting originally."
"Okay, I think I totally get it. Is that why the HVAC ducts are big enough for sidekicks to get through? In case they can't work stuff out?"
Otto blinked and scowled back down at the blueprints to figure out what the kid was talking about, "No? No! I've got them as small as they can get without leaving the air rank, and we've got mesh grids every five feet just in case they try anyway."
The kid pointed down at one point in the blueprints and traced out a line that went way from one-third of the way through the hallway to right near the end, "Not on this one. And it's got this other branch that leads out to the bathrooms in the laundry mat you're using as a front, even!"
Otto squinted down at what the kid was pointing out. It was a second branch of the air circulation network, focused mainly on the above ground business, but with a few pipes down below ground as federally mandated backups to the system he'd been focusing on locking down. "No. That's not for the sidekicks." He growled and grabbed for an eraser and pencil and got to work grinding out alterations.
"Huh. So what about the-" the kid started.
"One thing at a time. Let me get this fixed, then you can ask the next one, okay?"
"Yeah, sure, okay!" The kid shrugged and grabbed up one of Otto's old notebooks that had the first iteration of designs for the Boss' main vault and started reading while kicking his legs.
Otto just ground his teeth and focused on his work. Only thing worse than a kid was a precociously bright kid with an honest interest in your work. Worse thing in the goddamn world.
He should message Mykola and let him know he needed to get one of his other kids to bring up snacks for the brat. He was at that age where he was going to get hungry long before Otto was done.
"Why do we make laser grids like these?" "What do you mean?" "I mean instead of a messy random arrangement of lasers that a nimble intruder might be able to jump through, why not a simple grid wall with no gaps large enough to allow a person to pass through?"
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bitterkarella · 3 days ago
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Midnight Pals: Fictional Writer
Jamie Lee Curtis: hello midnight society King: jamie lee curtis! oh wow! King: i loved you in Shelley Duvall's Tall Tales & Legends Curtis: oh yeah i was in that Curtis: sorry that's not usually what people recognize me from King: why? what else have you been in? Curtis:
Curtis: i was in halloween King: oh yeah! i loved that! John Carpenter: you hated it when it came out King: well now i love it! Carpenter: Carpenter: god damn son of a bitch
Curtis: and i was in the fog King: oh yeah! i loved that! Carpenter: you hated it when it came out! King: well now i love it Carpenter: GOD DAMN SON OF A BITCH!!
Poe: what brings you here, jamie lee curtis? Curtis: well, i have a relative who wants to be a fictional horror writer Curtis: so i was hoping you guys could give them some ideas Poe: King: Lovecraft: Barker: Koontz: Poe: a fictional horror writer?
Poe: when you say a fictional horror writer, do you mean a writer of horror fiction or do you mean they don't exist, like they're making up a character who's a horror writer or...? Curtis: yes
Poe: well jamie lee curtis i think it would be best if your relative came up with their own ideas Poe: that is a big part of being a writer Koontz: OH OH OH Koontz: have they considered writing a story about a dog?
Curtis: tell me more Koontz: ok so what if there was a dog that was so good that everyone loved her and petted her and this dog was named trixie Curtis: ok Koontz: trixie is my dog's name Curtis: ok Koontz: i named her after my dog Curtis: ok Koontz: if you use this idea, you have to keep the name
Curtis: ok but where does the horror element come in? Koontz: what if the dog had to fight an evil monkey? Koontz: an evil monkey who was jealous of the dog cuz the dog was so cool??? Koontz: also the dog is super smart Curtis: i love it! King: dean don't give away your best idea for free!
King: dean don't just give away your best idea! King: especially not to a fictional writer who doesn't exist! Poe: steve i'm pretty sure she just meant "fiction writer" not a writer who doesn't exist King: oh i thought she meant like a george stark situation Curtis: tell me more about george stark
King: oh well george stark was the evil alter ego of a fiction writer in the dark half and Poe: steve King: and he becomes real after thad beaumont Poe: steve King: what? Poe: King: oh! King: oh you almost got me, jamie lee curtis! King: well played
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hitmehardnsofttt · 8 hours ago
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HELLO MAAM U SAID WE WERE GETTING CAITVI X READER AFTER ACT 2! IT IS NOW PAST ACT 3!!!
yall gon get enough of yelling at me lmaoo here dammit!
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Cat got your tongue? | Vi Arcane x Caitlyn Kiramman x Reader
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FYI: reader works in the undercity brothel, caitvi x reader, smut, (no major plot but read with the idea that Cait usually tops Vi 😉) receiving, oral sex, strap sex, strap referred to as cock, threesome, Enjoy whores! (Art Credit.)
Vi: Hey! I'm in town for the weekend. Are you free tonight?
Me: I have a client at 7 but after that I’m free. 😉
Vi: Perfect, I want to surprise my girlfriend, Cait. Switch things up for the night. 👀 How much again? Been a minute ya know lol
Me: Haha, no worries. Usually $1000 for couples! But for you old friend…I’ll do $750 😉
Vi: My girl. We’ll be there at 10:30!
“Why did you want me to wear this?” Cait asks Vi suspiciously as they approach the brothel door. "And where are we? How long are you going to make me wear this blindfold?" Vi can't help but chuckle as she pulls her girlfriend along. Always ever curious, it's one of the things she loved most about Cait.
“You’ll see cupcake, now come on, we’re running late.” Vi replies. She does the confidential knock on the door.
“Hey!”
“Violet… old friend, this way.” Babette smiles as she leads them to your room.
———————————————————————————
As you’re adding the vinyl to the record player, you hear a knock at the door. They're here. No need to be nervous. I did teach Vi everything she knows after all.
You walk over and open the door.
"Violet".. you trail off. Just as beautiful as I remember.. “And Cait.. come in." God, Vi. Doing pretty damn well for yourself. Cait… she’s breathtaking. "I've been expecting you."
"Vi?" Cait questions. "Can you take this blindfold off now, what's goi-" Before Cait can finish her barrage of questions, Vi sits her down on the bed, removing her jacket along with her blindfold. Her big bright blue eyes scan you up and down. You can't tell if they're filled with curiosity, lust, confusion, or a mix of the three. She looks back and forth between you and Vi. Holding her eyes at Vi, and it appears to you she's almost asking for permission..guidance maybe? Vi nods at her and then you.
You walk over to Cait, removing your silk robe exposing the intricate lace set that leaves...nothing...to the imagination. Easy access too.
Her eyes dart up and down your body as you straddle her long legs. You take her by surprise when you pull her in for a kiss without saying so much as a word. Throwing your arms around her shoulders, you swipe her bottom lip with your tongue, waiting for her to let you in, and she obliges. The kiss is fiery, passionate, not nearly as innocent as you were expecting. She grabs your hips and starts to grind them against her own.
Vi throws off her leather jacket and pants before she makes her way onto the bed, positioning herself next to you two.
Still straddling Cait, you pull away from her slightly, giving Vi just enough room. You get lost in a trance watching the way they kiss each other. You feel yourself growing more and more aroused with each passing second.
"God, you two are....so...so fucking hot." Your words pull them out of their kiss as they can't help but chuckle.
You throw your hands up innocently, holding back laughter, "Hey, I'm just being real!" You use the moments of laughter as a distraction, crawling up towards the head of the bed on all fours. You lay on your back and spread your legs for them.
"Now..help her take her clothes off, Violet,” you instruct.
Vi rushes to start removing Cait's clothes, but your next words halt her. "Ah, ah, ah, slowly," you demand.
You wet your two middle fingers with your tongue and start to tease your clit.
Vi follows your commands. She lazily starts to remove Cait's navy colored lace top. Kissing her way down each inch of her body as she does. Cait throws her head back in ecstasy as Vi takes her time showing attention to each of her perky pink nipples. Her skin somehow shines, even in this low light.
"Vi...." she trails off as her hips buck in response to her touch.
"Good girls, nice and slow…just like that…” you tell them.
Cait returns the sentiment, easily removing Vi's binding tank, exposing her.
Something she used to be so shy about…Cait's really brought her out of her shell.
The sound of a gritty moan from Vi pulls you out of your head and back into reality. You focus your eyes on Cait as she pulls on Vi’s nipple ring with her teeth.
"Like i said.... so...fucking...hot." you moan out.
Your sultry words direct Vi and Cait's attention back onto you. They crawl towards the head of the bed, closing in on the space around you. Vi grabs the strap you set out for tonight off of the bedside table, applying it effortlessly.
She leans over to Cait, whose licking her lips as she watches you play with yourself.
“Go ahead, cupcake. Taste her. Taste how wet she is for us while I stretch you..." she trails off, leaving trails of kisses down Cait's spine as they get into position.
Cait arches her back for Vi as she lifts her little skirt, pulling her matching navy lace panties to the side. Vi can't help but smack her ass, leaving a large red handprint on Cait’s pale skin. She winces in response.
"God, you're so wet already," she teases her with the tip of her cock before sliding inside of her with ease. Just as she thrusts inside of Cait, you grab her head and seal her moans with your drenched folds.
"Holy..." Vi doesn't seem to be able to finish her sentence.
"Cat got your tongue, Vi?" you ask teasingly.
"Looks like..it’s got Cait's… actually....” she manages to retort between chuckles.
Cait remains focused. She swipes her tongue up and down your slick slit, expertly. Your hands still holding her head steady in place. Your stomach overflows with nerves as she spits on your clit before blowing slow paced breaths on it. She spreads the hood and sucks on you, causing your entire body to twitch in response.
“Fu-fuck..yeah Cait with your tongue out like that. Look at me."
At first, you're able to watch, enthralled with her, but the skill of her tongue becomes too much…causing you to drop your hands and throw your head back in bliss.
Cait pauses and Vi's thrusts slow. "Look at me, I wanna watch you when you cum. I wanna see that pretty face," she tells you. Her accent turning you on more than you’d like to admit. She lowers her mouth back down onto your soaking wet pussy.
Vi's once slow thrusts gradually start to become erratic and Cait follows suit. She buries two of her lengthy fingers deep inside of you and curls them up, reaching for that spot. Every thrust Vi's giving her is causing her fingers to go deeper inside of you.
"Cait..Vi....I-I'm..." you stutter on your words.
"Awww sweetheart, I know you can do better than that, tell us how you bad you want it, baby," Vi responds.
You clear your throat.
"I- I need to cum… so fucking bad...for you...for both of you...p-please..” you whimper.
"Thatta girl...go ahead...finish her off, cupcake," Vi instructs.
With her fingers still pumping into you, Cait uses her other hand to spread you once more before engulfing your budding clit between her sweet lips. She alternates sucking and flicking her tongue against it, finally pushing you well over the edge. Your sweet arousal begins to soak her face and fingers, but she couldn't care less. In fact, she relishes in it.
"Fuck, " Vi moans out as she too starts to reach her peak, enhanced by the sight of you two.
She feverishly grabs Cait's hips, slamming her back against her cock, vying for any little bit of more friction she can get against her clit.
"Vi, don't st-stop," Cait manages to mutter out. You watch hypnotized as they both climax together...their fully spent bodies both collapse next to yours. You turn towards Cait, stealing a kiss from her, and then towards Vi, grabbing her cheek and stealing one from her as well.
Cait let’s out a dramatic deep sigh before she asks,
“Well ladies... how do we feel about round 2?”
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radical-community-care · 2 days ago
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tbh when I first saw the sentence "Activism is not cold-calling" I thought it was gonna go in a different direction. I fully agree with the post! and it reminds me of the advice on how to build community that is about *listening* to people first and actually engaging them in what they care about instead of rattling off some points YOU care about.
so for example, instead of going to Moderate Jason saying "Hello comrade do you have a minute to talk about socialism and how billionaires' taxes should pay for bike lanes!?" just have a normal conversation and ask them what kind of problems bother them or what difficulties they have to deal with in their day to day lives. and you actually listen and ask questions and care about what they think and see if you can find any common ground. maybe the two of you (or them and someone else you know) face a similar problem or one with the same root cause or with the same solution.
and this is not about getting them to parrot talking points or use the same kind of political language you do or join your group - this is about getting them to consider that maybe there are approaches to their problems that are community focused rather than individualistic, that are about shared humanity rather than pointing fingers at scapegoats, that are pushing towards flatter hierarchies rather than more authoritarianism.
again, they might not use or like all those particular words. maybe they'll say "back in my day, I would bike to school, it's a shame that's not safe anymore for my kids to do now." and then you two together can brainstorm ideas of what might be done about that in your specific circumstances. and you do what you can to help with it! whether you teach them about citizens initiatives or organise a "kiddical mass" (bike demo with kids) or whatever else fits.
but of course bike lanes might not be important to Moderate Jason at all. it's just one example. maybe they're a car nut and care about right to repair. or maybe they like sitting at home watching tv and care about avoiding ads and trackers, or about media depiction and representation of characters with a marginalised trait they or someone they care about has.
chances are, you will find *something* they want to talk about that is influenced by "politics" in a wider sense. and you can just mention how you see these issues or what you can think of that might help.
it helps to practice this approach in your head or with like-minded friends: go through all kinds of different things people care about and think how those could be done better in your utopia. and what might be small steps from here to there.
I do that with fiction constantly. from sitcoms to epic sff, I often go "how would I propose this group or society handle things/ what would I do to make their world a better, more just place?" Or just revelling in how cool the heroes are that they actually do good things (and remembering those tactics and figuring out how to apply them to the real world)
Activism is not cold-calling.
Activism is not cold-calling, and this is critically important to understand.
I'm seeing a lot of posts on here about 'building bridges' and 'finding community,' and then (extremely valid) response posts saying "BUT HOW??" And I'm going to explain something that can be very counter-intuitive: there is strategy involved in community.
As a longtime volunteer labour organizer, I’ve taken and taught many trainings on the strategy of talking. Something that surprises a lot of people is the very first thing you do in a union campaign. You sit down with your organizing committee, take out pen and paper, and literally map it out. You draw a physical map of the workplace: where are the entrances, exits, break rooms, supervisor offices. Essentially, ‘where is it safe to have a union conversation.’ Then you draw another physical chart of your coworkers. You sort out who is union-friendly, openly hostile to unions, or somewhere in the middle, and then you plan out very deliberately and carefully who talks to whom and in what order.
Consider: If Vocally Leftist Jane walks up to Conservative David and says "hey what do you think about unions," David is going to shut down immediately. He's not inclined to listen to Jane. But if Jane talks to Moderate Jason and brings him into the fold, then Jason is a far more effective strategic choice to talk to David, and David may actually hear him out without an instant reaction.
IMPORTANT CAVEAT: If Conservative David turns out to be Alt-Right David, and could be dangerous to follow organizers, we write him off. We are not trying to reach Alt-Right David. We are trying to reach Conservative David, who may actually be persuaded to find solidarity with other employees as fellow workers. Jason is a safe scout to find out which one he is. It does no one any good if Leftist Jane (or even Moderate Jane who is a visible minority) talks to Alt-Right David and puts herself on his radar. Not only has she done nothing to convince Alt-Right David to join a union - she's probably actively turned him against the idea - but now she's also in danger and the entire campaign is at risk. NOBODY WANTS THIS. Jane was NOT a hero for doing this. The organizing committee was foolish and enacted a terrible strategy to everyone's detriment.
Where you can make a difference is with people who will listen to you. You having a conversation with your well-meaning but clueless Centrist Democrat Auntie, and maybe gently helping her understand some things the media has been glossing over, is way more strategically useful than you marching up to MAGA Neighbour You've Met Once and trying to "build community" or "understand" them. They don't care. They're impervious, dangerous, and cruel. But maybe your beloved auntie will think about what you said, and then talk to her friend Anna who IDs as "fiscally conservative" but didn't vote because she can't bring herself to get on board with Trump. Then perhaps Anna talks to her brother Nic who has MAGA leanings but isn't all the way there yet. Proto-MAGA Nic would not have listened to you, nor would he have listened to Centrist Democrat Auntie, but he might absorb some of what his sister is saying.
This is not a cop-out or an echo chamber. This is you spending your time and energy strategically and safely. You are not a useful activist to anyone if you’re dead. Anyone who is telling you to hurl yourself directly at MAGA assholes like cannon fodder has no understanding of the strategy behind community building, and you should feel comfortable writing them off.
Last point: If you are tired, emotionally devastated, and/or in danger: take a break. This post is for people who would feel better jumping into action, not for people who are too overwhelmed to even think about it right now. You are worth so much even if you’re not actively Doing Activism, and your rest is worth more than “a break period so you can recharge and Do More Activism.” We all deserve the individual dignity of being worthy of comfort, rest & safety just on the basis of being human, outside of whatever we're doing for others' benefit. To deny ourselves that dignity is to devalue ourselves, and that’s the absolute last thing any of us should be doing right now.
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everytimewetouch-dot-mp3 · 2 days ago
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this is the serial killer direction i WANTED that actors au nonsense to go. all that shit is happening too, but this was the part that sparked that whole idea.
this post is loooong
warning binghe is an obsessive yandere freak 🥰 bingyuan are freak4freak tho so like…. it's fine
dead dove do not eat; he is a serial killer and he's kinda horny about it lmao
luo binghe is maybe shen yuan’s biggest fan. when he was fourteen, he saw sy as the male lead in a classical romantic opera and it inspired him to act. he’s seen all of shen yuan’s opening nights and most of his closings, and he was coached by shen yuan’s older brother (until shen jiu dropped him as a client…there was something Not Right about that boy and sj didn’t want him close). he’s got a bit of a shrine to shen yuan in his basement, filled with photos and newspaper clippings a few dried flowers—whenever he was given flowers on stage, shen yuan always tossed one back to the audience. binghe has three. he has every part of shen yuan he can get his hands on, but it's not enough.
when he and sy start working on sqh's game, it's like heaven and hell all at once. sy is even more beautiful up close, even kinder and funnier and smarter than he shows himself to be in the few interviews he's deigned to give. every moment lbh spends with him is ecstasy. every moment he spends apart from him is suffering unlike any he's ever experienced. every day he yearns to touch, to taste, to take shen yuan. to have him and keep him and treasure him the way no one else ever could. no one loves him like luo binghe loves him.
this video game they're working on—it's got a lot of endings. most of the game is the player on their own, but there's one path that gets the shitty teacher character as a companion. and further down that path…well, there are a lot of romance options in a game as big as this.
things start out fine; lbh and sy have great chemistry, it turns out. even when sy has to play the cruel teacher, it's got this undercurrent of something that could easily open the door for the romance arc later on. lbh knew they'd have great chemistry. he and sy are destined to be together; of course they'd work well on screen. they hang out between takes, eat their meals together, carpool when they can. it's amazing.
it's not enough. binghe burns with the need to possess his beloved, and every day he's denied what he rightfully deserves, that fire burns hotter. one night, he goes out to try to find a hookup, just to let off some steam. it's supposed to be a hookup, it really is. he finds someone who looks similar enough to sy from the back that he can almost pretend it's him. but his voice is all wrong, and his attitude is too brazen, and it pisses binghe off so bad that he chokes the guy just so he'll shut up.
it's just—he doesn't stop choking him until he finishes a few minutes later, and by that point, the guy is…well. mbj helps lbh scrub the body and cover his tracks, and the corpse is found a few days later with no real leads.
it happens again a few weeks later. lbh can't have shen yuan, but so many pale imitations throw themselves at him. and every time, he takes them to bed and he swears he won't get angry this time. it's not sy; he knows it isn't sy. there's no need to be angry with them for pretending to be sy when they're not.
he gets angry anyway. he can't help it. he accepts these men's advances, he takes him to bed, he kills them and kills them and kills them. eventually, news comes to light. the date-night killer, a deeply uninspired name born only from the fact that their last known locations were all night clubs. they're all around the same height, all have short brown hair and glasses, all similar builds.
one night binghe asks shen yuan if he wants to go get drinks. he knows a nice quiet lounge, not too crowded since it's so exclusive. shen yuan declines. jokes that he'd better not—the date night killer likes guys with short brown hair; maybe they'd go after him next.
the next body that turns up is…different. still strangled to death, but it seems like the killer (a copycat most likely, the cops say) felt regret afterward. on the victim's back, over and over again, is carved "i'm sorry i'm sorry i'm sorry i'm sorry…"
his a-yuan is afraid of him. luo binghe hates himself, and he hates all these people who put themselves in his path, who get themselves killed by daring to try to replace a-yuan in his heart. it's their fault a-yuan is afraid. binghe is the only one who can keep him safe. he knows he is.
binghe keeps it together until they're approaching the end of shen yuan's time in the studio. the arc is almost finished, and shen yuan mentions that in a month he'll be leaving for his next show's rehearsals. some opera, binghe's pretty sure; his hearing sort of cut out when his beloved said he was leaving. the news is a knife to the heart. his a-yuan can't leave. a-yuan belongs with him, no one can take him away. binghe needs a-yuan, and a-yuan needs binghe.
that night, luo binghe and shen yuan vanish without a trace. binghe has a house. it's under a false identity, and it's way out in the mountains. there, he can keep his a-yuan safe and comfortable. there, he can work to earn his a-yuan's affection. there, no one can take his a-yuan away.
he explains to a-yuan that they're home now, that they are together as they belong, that luo binghe will be the best husband to his precious a-yuan. and sy is so beautiful, so clever, of course he figures out that luo binghe is the date night killer. it's alright though, binghe promises, because he only killed those people for daring to imitate his beloved. now that he and his husband are finally together, binghe's got no reason to kill anyone else. they'll be happy together now that there's no one else in the way.
when shen yuan smiles, it's like the sun breaking through the clouds. he shifts, asks binghe to untie his arms. of course, binghe obeys. anything for his husband. he's not a fool; he knows shen yuan might try to fight and escape as a test of binghe's ability to protect him, and binghe's ready. but instead, shen yuan reaches out and stokes binghe's hair, his cheek. 'binghe went so far for me,' he murmurs, a hypnotic gleam in his eye that luo binghe has never seen. 'i hoped that night… i thought for sure you'd take me when i turned you down for drinks, but you tried so hard to be respectful, didn't you? well. maybe someday binghe will let me see him work? i quite liked the one you carved for me, but i really didn't need an apology. you can try again, can't you? will you make something pretty for me?'
the next corpse is rather beautifully arranged. the wounds carved into the body are artistic, elegant flowing lines and flowers carved into the skin. in the middle of its back, the double happiness character is drawn. shen yuan thinks it’s a lovely wedding present.
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tagthescullion · 20 hours ago
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Do you have any headcanons about who the different PJO/HOO characters would see if they saw Nemesis? I think that Thalia would see Beryl and Nico would see Artemis.
so, I'm taking the book version of the goddess, which says you see the person you resent the most. that to me isn't who you hate the most, but somebody you dislike personally, somebody you probably thought of hurting or wish you saw justice from even if you don't want it to happen for real
thalia would definitely see beryl before being a tree, but what if she saw zeus too after he failed to save her properly and only turn her into a plant?
nico would see artemis for a while, then probably minos after he screwed him over at the worst possible time, and it'd be interesting if he saw percy as a source of resentment for his sexuality (we're talking a kid's mind here), and then later on cupid too, as he was the one who outed him.. after he's comfortable with himself, though, I bet he'd see minos as a base-image
percy might see gabe or ares, then luke for a while, but after TLO, I'm not so sure, as he seems to emphasise with luke a bit too much (I know kronos is his archnemesis but idk if he resents kronos as much as just plain hate him)
annabeth would see her step-mother. I know they're supposed to have made peace and all, but frankly, it's still shit what she did, and annabeth doesn't seem to hold the worst grudges but she did despise her step-mum in an obviously personal level..
it'd be interesting if jason saw jupiter since he might be resented that he had to be a leader and a soldier since he was a toddler based on little more than "you're jupiter's son"
hazel sees some teacher or other but what if she saw bianca? she was super jealous of the idea of bianca, and jealousy can easily turn into resentment
half the hermes cabin would see luke, not bc of what he did but bc he was still hermes' fave despite it all
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askshivanulegacy · 33 minutes ago
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It's ok to write with another person's input. And some people like to beta fics, even long ones. Having a beta reader isn't a requirement, though, and lots of people don't use one. If you want people to beta fics, probably breaking them up into chapters is better. That's easy to do when you're writing it yourself. 3000+ words don't appear overnight.
If that 3000+ words is AI slop though, yeah, no one's going to want to beta that. Why should they waste time on something you didn't? That sounds like you wanting everyone else to put in the work instead of yourself. You're just passing the buck.
Ideas have value insomuch as everyone and their dog has ideas. They're a dime a dozen. People don't care that you have ideas. They care about what you DO with them. Giving them to AI to let the AI do something with them is not your work.
Things only have value because time was spent on them. If I craft something, I can label value in terms of cost of materials and labor in an hourly rate. I can do that for writing too. The value of the A03 fics you read is literally based on the time someone took to write it. A 100-hr fic at $15/hr has a value of $1500. That also accounts for the skill and experience of the writer.
If you generate the same fic with AI, it takes zero time and zero effort, so the value is zero. There's no application of skill or experience or knowledge. Even if you were highly skilled enough to rate $30/hr, you multiply by zero. That AI fic is worth nothing.
That's just one example to describe the value of a fic.
But maybe you don't like capturing value in terms of dollars.
It still remains that if you didn't spend your time writing something, nobody else wants to spend time reading it. Why should they give you attention, comments, likes, etc., over something you didn't do? That attention wouldn't belong to you, it would belong to the AI. To everyone else, that fic has zero value.
If you want an AI to crank things out for your personal use, that's up to you and no one can stop you. If you enjoy that and you don't care about getting real results for real time and effort, you do you. Sure, it can have personal value.
But it doesn't have value to anyone else, certainly not enough to warrant time and energy to read, beta, or comment on it, when you yourself didn't want to do anything whatsoever and haven't earned their time.
You want attention for nothing. Real writers enjoy the process of creation.
just saw a fanfic on ao3 have a dedication for chatgpt... that section is meant for your horny perverted mutual who proofread your work, you violated sacred law and you will be torn apart and laid bare btw
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okay disjointed thoughts about the wicked movie 1 day after watching it lets go
-first of all, my movie theater put speakers outside and was just blasting the entire soundtrack on repeat. we could hear it down the street as we were driving up. that's just simply insane
-the opening establishing shots of the land were great but honestly. the very clearly animated dorothy and gang really annoyed me lmfao like I'm sorry it cannot have possibly been too hard to get a few extras to stand in front of a screen for point 5 seconds lol. it was so fast that I Know I'm being dramatic about it but they looked more cartoon than the flying monkey's did
-baby elphie and baby nessa are the cutest things I've ever seen in my life...
-I kinda...like the more human/animal hybrids that the stage show and the original movie had. sorry. like I Get they were only like that bc you can't make a real life goat sing and dance but they're just more interesting to look at than normal-looking animals who happen to talk!
-jeff goldblum's face being hidden every time he had a dance number...I have a sneaking suspicion that he wasn't really dancing lmfao
-whoever decided to bleach ariana's eyebrows deserves jail time
-when jonathan bailey first showed up on screen my mother leaned over to me and whispered 'he's HANDSOME...'
-when cynthia finished the 'wizard and I' I had to actually stop myself from applauding. it felt so weird and rude for there to be dead silence after that performance my GOD.
-also omg the part where she's singing about the wizard de-green-ifying her and the colors in the suncatchers were canceling out the green so she looked normal....inspired!
-madame morrible had these HUGE crystal ball looking rings and I just want them so much lmao
-glinda's friends were really funny the bit were she was like 'I need to lie down' and they immediately picked her up like a plank of wood and carried her off while the one was screaming 'WE NEED A PASTRY!!! IT'S AN EMERGENCY WE NEED A PASTRY!!!' had me cackling
-I wish there was more time between them moving in and 'what is this feeling' starting? like I wanted more time to see them bickering and then also more time seeing them getting along after the ball??
-'dancing through life' was BEAUTIFUL however two complaints 1) why would they cut the line 'what's the most swankified place around?' I Quote That Often and 2) at the end when glinda and elphie dance together like...it's beautiful and everything but from what I remember after their solo moment fieryo joins them?? and they have a cute three way dance moment??? and I'm very pro "they're all in love with each other" so I missed that lol
-also just in general would of liked to see more of fieryo with the girls! like it felt like ball->lion cub->emerald city, in the course of a couple days, and idk I just feel like they could have slowed it down a bit?? especially since they broke it into two movies?? like I don't think that Actually all happened in the span of a week, but they didn't do a good enough job establishing how much time was passing so it Felt like it. which is dumb bc then it just doesn't seem realistic that elphie and glinda are THAT attached to each other by defying gravity like it feels like not enough time has passed for them to really know each other
-boq felt very mild tbh I know ethan can be more unhinged than that
-would've liked to see glinda in magic class!!
-I was a little underwhelmed by elphaba's costumes? like there were clearly patterns on the material but it was all the same shade of black so you couldn't make anything out. it felt a bit flat. and I love the idea behind the freckles I agree with freckles I am pro freckles HOWEVER her's looked very obviously drawn on. like, I have seen way more realistic fake freckles before. so that was a bit annoying
-other than the lunchmeat dress glinda's costumes were good! especially loved the flower shaped one she wore to the ball
-the whole trying to escape in the hot air ballon scene was cool as hell but as the flaming remains of it fell to the ground I couldn't help but be like wow...she really just killed all those guards huh!
-also lmfao the bit in the woods with the lion club and fieryo has like a scratch on his temple. genuinely thought to myself 'is that his lobotomy scar' lmfao
-still trying to get over the part in dancing through life where people were dancing on the spinning gears in the clock tower...bitch
-the flying monkeys were correctly horrifying
-when I saw the broomstick I was like 'won't that be really uncomfortable between your legs' but then she just held it next to her like they do in the stage show and I was like....okay I guess you win that one? lmfao like I don't mind it for when she's hovering but when they had her like supersonic zooming on the broom it was weird that she wasn't actually riding it
-overall I just don't understand how it's an adaptation of act 1 but it's the length of the entire stage show?? lmao like I wish they took advantage of the split and added so much more but really really it was still just such a solid great movie. 5 stars. I can't keep talking about it right now I'm gonna start screaming.
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ohsohoney · 3 days ago
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When it comes to love you're just as blinded.
Part Fifteen
Eminem x Musician
Summary: It starts with a drunk embarrassing video, it spirals into something a whole lot more.
Note: Sorry sorry sorry for how long it's taken for me to update!! Had a lot on and then I got real sick. Hope this is an alright update though:) Continues on from the last scene where they were at the cinema!
Enjoy seeing the articles I tried to make too lmao, they're there not too far down after the first couple paragraphs. Idk what I was thinking w that one, but it felt necessary after the long wait!
| Set in 2014, just after the release of LP 2
taglist: @thelastemzy @helloitsme1223 @geekchic48
Masterlist
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It was Saturday, and Saturday typically meant that the weekend had finally come. And both of those things had yet to occur whilst I’d been staying in Detroit. Which, in truth, wasn’t the only thing to throw me completely off my game this morning.
Although honestly, it was a really big change.
Rosie wasn’t around yet. Apparently Saturday’s were sacred days within the Mathers household, seeing as the pre-teen liked to sleep in on the mornings she had off from school, which also meant that Marshall got to finally have a lie-in. Or, at least it seemed that way when I’d decided to venture from the confines of my room around about nine, after having had a brief breakdown over everything I’d woken up to.
The media was in meltdown mode.
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Every news outlet from here to Beijing was talking about the pictures that had been captured last night in the car park to the theatre, as well as the one’s I’d taken with that particular girl outside of the women’s bathroom. It seemed that other fans had connected all the dots in the time between my head hitting the pillow and now. 
I had zero idea as to what I was meant to do about it all. My phone was blowing up with notifications from every account that I held, as well as friends and even some family members I hadn’t spoken to since I’d told them where they could shove it the last time they’d come sniffing round looking for a payout. 
It was the most nauseating feeling, believing that you’d lost complete control over a situation.
But it was just as I’d gathered up the courage to go knock on Em’s bedroom door that my phone rang once again. Only this time, it was one of the names I’d been hoping to see. 
“Elia, you there?”
A shaky breath escaped me as I pressed my phone closer to my ear, hastily turning on my heel to head down the stairs. 
“Mila.” I exhaled, but even I could hear the anxiety that lined my voice and it wasn’t because Mila and I had barely spoken since the whole argument we’d had over Lottie. No, this was down to me knowing that things had to be really fucked up because my manager had shared that same wavering tone. “I don’t know what to do. Everything– it’s all just blown up in my face.”
There was a long pause which followed my clumsy reply, I used it to slip out of the back garden door to escape the sudden confining feel the house had started to give me. Which seemed so stupid in hindsight, what with how big it was, but that thought alone allowed me to take another deep breath. 
I shivered at the cold that overwhelmed Detroit in the early throes of winter but didn’t care enough to head back inside to grab a cardigan or even a pair of shoes. My mind honed in on the way my life seemed to be crumbling piece by piece, first with Lottie and her dad, then that whole back and forth thing with Marshall, and now this.
“It’s not as bad as you think.”
Rolling my eyes at the answer Mila gave, I could only huff out a mirthless laugh, stressed beyond belief. 
“Yeah, it’s not like my face is plastered over every gossip rag across the world– oh wait, it is.” I sniped back, “And they’re all painting me out to be Marshall’s next big fling, and if not that, then some fucking groupie. Like I’m not a nominated artist too, as though all I am is someone to mooch off of his fame.”
Mila sighed softly, even after my heated retort, and I could hear it clearly over the rustle of leaves as well the birds that seemed to be chirping in the distance. I tried to let them ground me. “I didn’t mean it like that. It probably does look pretty bad from your end–”
I cut her off with a scoff– so much for trying for a bit of calm. “Bad? Mila, bad would have been me spotted leaving Detroit and people conspiring over why I was here in the first place. Not this.” I dragged a tense hand through my hair, “Em is gonna flip his shit when he sees everything.”
She sighed, again, and I could only rub tiredly at my eyes. “Babe, listen to me. You’ve not ever really had any publicity like this,” Mila started, and before I could think to lash back at that remark, she was already beating me to the punch, “And no, before you say anything, not like that. I know that you don’t want anything out of this whole fiasco, believe me the amount of times I’ve had to suffer through just because your ego wouldn’t let you take anything for free is insufferable. But anyway, I simply meant in the way that you’ve not really had many big knocks or hits like this throughout the press. Sure, your family and your background’s been brought up a lot, but babe, those are just conversation starters for you now, it sort of was back then too. This is all just scarier to you because it’s new.”
I had to take a second to really hear Mila’s words, for them to sink and settle before I could analyse them. In a way, she wasn’t completely wrong. I could at least admit that. Didn't mean that I hadn’t faced my fair share of backlash though, just maybe not on this level? And not over someone I was supposedly dating either, my brain unhelpfully supplied.
I closed my eyes, silently wishing for a cigarette I didn’t have, and then unclenched my jaw.
“I don’t know what I’m supposed to do.” I confessed to her quietly, then shivered when another harsh wind blew through the garden. I wrapped an arm around myself, to shelter me from the cold air or how exposed I felt, I didn’t know.
Mila stayed silent too, until I heard a large intake of breath and the sound of a door closing on the other side. “Here’s what you’re gonna do. You’re going to talk to Marshall, you’re going to figure out what it is you want, not just him or his team.” She added as a forethought, knowing me far too well. “Then the pair of you, you and him, can decide how and where you want to take this.”
I exhaled slowly and watched as my breath clouded the air, it made me wonder how cold it might have been over in London. “Right.”
Mila continued on, her familiar lilt taking back the weariness which had homed it minutes earlier, “I mean it’s not like anything’s actually happened, if you want to you two can just ignore it easy, wait for this all to blow over. It’s just gossip.”
My eyes widened and I stilled at her words.
But I must’ve been quiet far too long though, because Mila called my name and suddenly I was forcing myself to blink as I attempted to swallow back the memories of that kiss, of him holding my hand with all the care in the world. 
“Right,” I repeated again, then cursed the way my voice cracked on the vowel.
Mila caught it right away and I felt rather than heard her internalise exactly what that could possibly mean, “You haven’t done anything– right?”
My mouth worked over words that wouldn’t quite come out and then winced when I heard my manager drop the phone to curse heatedly in Spanish.
It took a long minute before Mila had seemingly calmed herself enough to return to the call, time in which I spent worrying my knuckle between my teeth and wondering if everything that had happened with Em was even worth mentioning. If it mattered enough to him for me to voice it now. 
“How long have I been telling you that you need to get back out there, to meet somebody and have some fun? I’m glad you took my advice, really, but I didn’t quite mean wrangle the biggest old-school rapper into your bed whilst holidaying in his mansion!”
I let my head fall into the hand not holding my phone and pinched at the bridge of my nose. I didn’t want to regret it, the things that had happened with Marshall, but Mila was sort of right. What had I really expected to happen between the two of us? He was a Dad, more famous than anyone could hope to be, and a tad bit older… Okay, a fair bit older– a decade, sue me. Hollywood had seen worse.
That wasn’t even it though, how had I yet to consider what the media, the press, the fans would think of it all? I supposed I’d pretty much found out.
“I didn’t sleep with him.”
Mila made an odd sort of noise at my admission which sounded tinny through the speaker, “Don’t lie to me now! Those photos don’t offer much, I’ll give you that, but babe, there was some sort of connection there.”
I fish mouthed again. 
Mila didn’t seem to note the silence, “People are in actual awe over the look one picture managed to capture on his face! There’s no way you haven’t got that man wrapped around your finger.”
Blinking, I tried to recall what image she could possibly be talking about. I hadn’t seen anything of the sort. “I wouldn’t lie to you, Mils. Nothing like that has happened. It was just–” My mouth felt dry, the sort of dry you’d experience after being lost in a desert for days or just swallowed a spoonful of flour.
“Just what?” Mila prodded.
And I forced myself to finish my sentence, stare caught on the dampness that clung to the soles of my feet, “A kiss.”
I had a list now. 
Of tasks to complete, one of which warned me to stay off all social media for my own good. Mila’s orders, not my own. But still, I couldn’t quite part with my phone even as I stepped back through the garden door into the kitchen, shivering at the rapid change in temperature and the sick feeling of anxiety that welled inside of me. 
Even with that though, I noticed how the house now seemed to buzz, in a way which had me figuring that I was no longer the only occupant awake. So I swallowed back the lump of worry that sat heavy in my throat and made to trail my way further inside, ignoring the slight chill of tile that followed my feet. 
I found him stood at the very top of the stairs with Rosie hanging off his hip, the silliest of grins plastered across her face which only appeared to brighten upon seeing me. “El!” She called out in excitement before she turned to fix her father with a ‘told you so’ glare, “See, she is awake!”
Marshall rolled his eyes at the rebuttal, but did evidently blow out a huffed chuckle in turn, choosing to let his daughter slip down his side and out of the captive hold he’d had her in for my supposed sake. He shook his head at her before he then turned to me, the exasperated look he’d gifted her disappeared the moment he saw my face. “You good?” He asked me, brow furrowing as Z peered between the pair of us.
“Where’s your phone?” Is all I answered him with.
His expression deepened at the nonanswer, but he scratched his head in thought before he recalled, “Chargin’ downstairs, I think. Died when we got home.”
Home, home, home.
I realised, not for the first time, that I’d taken to thinking of it that way too. Calling it London and not home each time it got brought up.
Swallowing once more, I felt another wave of nausea overwhelm me. Rosie’s head tilted in confusion as she quietly made her way down the staircase, hand sliding over the wooden rail. “I–” I tried, but fumbled for the right words to say. If there even were any. I let go of another breath, “You should go take a look.”
Marshall greeted my words with a look of reservation but did move to step down off the landing, making it to the bottom just as Rosie crowded me, her smaller figure slotting into my side with ease. I allowed a hand to come up and cradle the top of her head, hoping that whatever transpired from this wouldn’t sour things enough to send me back to London early.
And why was that my only hope? Instead of the way this could all impact me and my career, or the people around Marshall?
I didn’t move to follow Em as he made his way into the kitchen, socked feet padding over the tiled floor, much preferring the warmth that radiated from Z as I fought not to worry at my knuckles once more. I didn’t know whether or not I wanted to bear witness to his reaction. 
“You’re freezing.” 
The words caught me by surprise and so I blinked away from where I’d just been staring off into the distance, then peered down at the girl whose arms were wound around me. Rosie had her head tilted back, chin resting on the curve of my arm as she waited for an explanation. 
“Sorry, just stepped outside for a minute,” I apologised to her whilst simultaneously answering the unasked question. It was subconscious, the action to rub a gentle hand up and down her arm in hopes to warm the pair of us up a tad, and Z countered her previous words by burrowing in closer. 
“Are you leaving then?” 
That next question immediately had me frowning, wiping away all the previous doubts that had just been running rampant through my mind. 
“No, not yet.” I assured her softly, peering down at her once again. Her face was half-hidden, blonde hair mussed by sleep, and in that moment she looked so much younger to me. “Why you asking, hoping to get rid of me?” I teased sweetly, hoping that the method wouldn’t send her skittering into her shell and instead give me something of an honest answer.
The girl shook her head against my arm, then shrugged, “Just, you looked sad.”
A sad smile slowly eased over my features at that and I couldn’t help the way I squeezed her tighter. “Busy morning, I think.” I said in comfort, then thought about my next words, “But even if I was sad, doesn’t mean I’d just pack up and leave. Me and you, we’ve bonded, gonna have a hard time getting rid, okay?”
I pinched her side playfully with that, a move that had her squeaking and tripping over her feet to get away from my attack whilst still staying plastered to my side. “Don’t! You’re actually the worst!”
Laughing as she dissolved into giggles too, I relented on the tickling. And it was just as I went to reply that a sound had my head snapping up and over towards the kitchen doorway, heart stilling in my chest at the sight of Marshall stood there, phone in hand, his face void of any emotion.
“We need to talk.”
Rosie appeared to be all too aware of the sudden tension that dragged between us then, as well as the coil of nerves which straightened my spine, because she let her arms slip from my waist and took her hand in mine, squeezing ever so as she turned to look up at me. Obviously confused, she had no words to offer but the sentiment was clear anyway, she cared enough to stand against her Dad without even knowing what was going on.
It threw me completely.
Marshall seemed to catch on to the silent protest too, his blank expression flickering with evident surprise before he managed to unclench his hand from around his phone and drag it over the top of his head. He slumped, the ridgid stress he’d just been wearing melting ever so slightly. “We just gone talk, Z. She ain’t goin’ nowhere, I swear it’s work stuff. Something happened and now we gotta work out how we gone fix it, baby. That’s all.”
Z stared long and hard back at Marshall and the man met her eyes dead on, showing her he only meant the truth. His words seemed to appease some part of her, I deemed, enough to have her tightening her hold on my hand once more before she reluctantly pulled away. 
I only wished that they’d had the same effect on me.
“That mean we’re not having pancakes then?” She wondered as she trailed across the hallway to head towards the kitchen, Em’s shoulders dropped slightly when she approached and he moved to run a hand through her hair.
“Promise is a promise. Jus’ have to wait a little longer, cool?” He answered, gazing down at her before he finally allowed her to slip by after she’d given him a nod. It was with that in which he turned to face me again and I had no idea what was going to go down, let alone how he was going to react. So when he silently gestured his head off to the side, I could only force my feet into following behind him.
We ended up in a small office just off of the living room, one I hadn’t really been in before now and that was decorated sparsely enough to ensure that no one else did either, at least not often.
Marshall took perch at the desk in there, large and mahogany, and leaned across it to start up the computer monitor stationed on its top. I found myself trailing after him, shuffling awkwardly on a dark rug for a second over where to sit before I just rolled my eyes at myself and moved around the desk to sit on its corner, uncaring for the way Marshall’s brows lifted in slight surprise. Because honestly, if we were going to do this then I wanted to see what the fuck the media was rioting over too, and how was I meant to do exactly that from the upholstered cushion sat on the desks opposing side?
He didn’t comment on it, though his eyes did trail over me for a split second before the screen flickered through the usual start up and login. I watched him type in his password, noting how he didn’t much seem to mind me peeking, before my eyes flitted back down to his face, taking in the way the monitor's light flickered over his skin and how his tongue darted out to wet his lower lip.
I wrung my fingers together in a way that would occupy my mind, mouth pursing at the sight of the slightly reddened knuckles I’d abused earlier. My stare must have caught Marshall’s attention too because I startled a tad when he reached out to pause my fidgeting, gaze lingering on the raised skin before the pad of his thumb moved to soothe it. 
Suddenly my tongue felt too big for my mouth and all I could do was stare before his startled gaze flickered up to meet me. It almost appeared as though he hadn’t even realised he’d done it. 
“Z’s okay, right?” I found myself asking him as I cleared my throat after he’d withdrawn his hand.
His sniff filled the silence as his arm jumped over to grab the mouse, now focused on the screen. “She um,” He coughed lightly, the click of the keys filling his tense pause, “She gets a little weary about shit like that, I guess. People leaving. Had a lot of ‘em come in and out of her life, figure it fucked with her a bit.” Marshall admitted gruffly, purposely paying attention to the computer now instead of meeting my eye. 
I continued to watch him though, content to wait. My patience earned me a little more.
“Thought she’d grown outta it though, you know? Used to cry for her mom when she’d drop her off, or when I took her to school. Shit was always worse when I had to tour. Couple years back, she even got upset when Maria, our cleaning lady, moved States. Didn’t come outta her room for days.” He shrugged lightly as he recalled it, acting as though it didn’t much bother him anymore, but I could tell that it was eating away at him still, how much he blamed himself for Rosie’s struggle. “Figure she likes you enough that it’s sort of– I dunno.” He sighed, then waved it all off, desperate to move on it seemed, “You know what, don’t worry about it. I’ll figure it out.”
I wanted to sigh then too, because how could he think that I’d allow that to just slide?
“I’m here for her too, you know.” I heard myself say after a second or two had passed and kept myself from looking over at him to garner his reaction to that particular statement. This was meant to be work. I was just here to work. Though, that reminder had long since grown old. “I get it, being scared to attach yourself to new people in fear that they'll hurt you by leaving too. And Rosie, she’s not messed up for feeling that way, it’s just a coping mechanism. One a lot of kids experience–”
Em scoffed at that and my eyes instantly snapped over to find him shaking his head at me.
I narrowed my eyes a tad, but not unkindly or in defence, just a little perplexed. 
“It’s true. Sure, they might not all have had a childhood like hers or mine, or even yours.” I acquiesced, “But even the kids who have that apple pie type life and grow up with cookie cut families can still be scared about those they love leaving. Like because their Dad works abroad a lot so they don’t see much of him, or how someone forgot to pick them up this one time and made them wait so now they’re fucked up forever.” 
I smiled at the small laugh that escaped from Marshall at that, probably thinking over how normal that had probably been for him as a kid. I got it. “Mind’s weird, man. Kids are adaptable, but they get just as scuffed up as the rest of us. Z’s the same, but she’ll figure it out.”
“Or, jus’ do what you did and hold onto it so tight that people have to fight their way into her life.” Em countered easily, earning an audible gasp from me before he was smirking away and reaching out to poke a finger into my knee, assuring me that it was all in jest, “And don’t call me man, that shit’s weird.”
“Why not? What’s wrong with man?” I protested, grinning now as I started to pester him, “We’re homies, aren’t we? Buddies? Brothers?”
I cackled when he reached up to crowd a hand over my mouth, shaking his head all the while, even as I shimmied to try and escape his onslaught.
“What about bud?” I asked him from over the top of his hand the second I could, trying to steer my head away as I swatted him with my foot in retaliation, “Or dude? Hey, how about bro? Bro’s a good one!”
“Elia.” Marshall warned in a low tone once he finally caught my wrists in his hands, stilling me completely. Though I could see the tiny beginnings of his smile.
My eyes flashed upwards to meet his when he stood up from the desk’s chair, “Yeah?” I only continued to push, hoping that it would get me somewhere. Where though? I had no idea.
“You talk too much.”
My smile was far too smug.
“First time I've ever been told that.” I rebuffed, letting myself lean a little further into his hold.
“Somehow I don’t believe that.”
Humming, my eyes flickered between his own. “What do you want me to call you then?”
Marshall stared back at me unblinkingly for a long second, before his gaze dropped to my mouth then away again. “Guess that’s jus’ another thing we can go ahead and figure out.”
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wingedshadowfan · 2 days ago
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⚠️arcane s2 act ii spoilers⚠️
my thoughts on the spit scene and the future of caitvi:
i don't wanna get into my personal feelings about the astronomical amount of disrespect spitting in someone's face communicates (esp bcuz i fear it might be culture to culture), but i wanna say two things about caitlyn's reaction and how that scene played out
i preface this by saying NO ONE can convince me vi spitting in cait's face was rehearsed or agreed upon by the two of them prior, bcuz how do you think that conversation would've gone?? vi wouldn't ask for that ever, and caitlyn wouldn't agree to it because of pride and status, let alone suggest it. literally listen to how they really to each other after the tackle. the spitting it was incredibly unnecessary (bet it wouldn't make or break whether ambessa was sold by their performance or not) and most likely an impulse or a choice vi made in the heat of the moment, because she spent the little time they had planning out how to double cross ambessa, not resolving her anger at caitlyn for how she'd treated her the last time they saw each other, so it just bubbled out of her (literally)
1) caitlyn barely flinches, and doesn't have a huge reaction after it happens either (does not seem very in character if the spitting was unplanned)
to me this is her own subtle way of accepting vi's sudden and very real feelings of anger and validating them, she doesn't fight back (performatively or lot), she doesn't argue, she just lets it happen and rolls with the punches which to me signifies her awareness of what she did to illicit this reaction, fake or real, and it's effectively like her saying "i kinda deserved that one, didn't i?"
2) caitlyn proceeds to wipe vi's spit towards her mouth instead of away from it (which is obviously very counter intuitive)
i know what you freaks are gonna say abt this one but stay with me. this feels like a promise for the future, like she's aware this isn't the last of vi's anger and that the things between them aren't resolved yet, they're not even, and she's got much to make up to vi for - this feels like caitlyn's readiness to keep her chin up and take everything vi's gonna give her, good or bad, she can take it
and of course, those points are deeply interconnected and united by the idea that caitlyn regrets what she did because she's aware of the pain she caused vi so carelessly, she still has deep feelings for vi, ignited immediately upon seeing her again, and she's ready to fight and give up so much for a chance at salvaging what they had, even if vi chooses to (rightfully) punish her, even if she needs to get it out of her system, caitlyn is ready to answer with compassion and let her
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ploshansky · 9 hours ago
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i've always found it particularly insulting when people insist that i'll have kids one day because i've always been pretty quick to divulge that childbirth is literally my greatest fear. i'm scared of the process, the mental and physical toll, the pain, the very real possibility of complications, the kid itself. like i've had nightmares where i wake up sobbing because either i had kids and i didn't want them, or i was pregnant and i didn't want to be. when people egg on the idea of me having kids it feels like they're telling me "mark my words you're going to be the first one buried alive" or "oh she's sooo going to have both her hands sawed off one day." normally i got the whole "well it's different when it's your kid," or of course, "you'll change your mind." okay, sure. stranger things have happened. allow me to present another angle: i know in my heart of hearts that i am not willing to be a parent.
i have very little patience. i hold grudges. i am very self-involved. i am somehow both flighty and steadfast in my ways. i can barely handle my own body and mind, let alone worry about a child's mental and physical state. i'll be the first person to say that moms are superheroes and i will forever kiss the ground that they walk on, but i'm not interested in making the sacrifices my mother made just for me to be a snotty teenager in return. "but you're so good with kids!" yeah, because i'm just playing with them. i'm not making sure they eat, cleaning their poop and boogers and vomit, paying for doctor's visits, etc. none of that matters though. i could be patient, forgiving, selfless, go-with-the-flow, organized, mentally stable, etc. the important thing here is that i don't want to. that should negate every single motherly quality that i do or don't possess.
for some reason this explanation (that i thought was actually pretty solid, but silly me) is always taken as a sort of bashful "o how nice it would be to partake in motherhood..... alas, i am simply unfit......." spiel where i paint motherhood as this far-off concept that i could only wish to participate in. usually i'm met with "nooo don't say that you would make an amazing mother!" but i'm literally telling you outright: not only would i be an awful parent, i have no interest in being one, and i certainly wouldn't want to put a child in the position of having a parent that's not 101% committed to the job. i get that moms make a lot of sacrifices, and if push came to shove, yeah i'd probably bite the bullet and make those sacrifices. but i would harbor resentment, and that doesn't do any good for either of us. i don't want a kid mainly because it scares me, but it would be so fucking unfair to a kid to have me as a mother.
and re: the whole "what if your husband wants kids?" thing–i do not want to be in a relationship where a baby is the only thing holding us together, much less the concept of a baby.
stop telling your teenage daughters who say they don't want kids that they'll change their mind
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edledamianfan · 3 days ago
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Ride homes late at night sure is a feeling, especially on a high way going at a fast speed on the way home. Looking at the window and u see the whole city below you. The lights and everything, it's just a feeling, fleeting moment that last with u for a lifetime.
I wonder that's what dick felt when he was Robin on the Batmobile. Every single night on the same roads, highways, going out, going back back after fighting crimes.
But there is something missing here.
Having music playing would've been nicer.
It would distract him from his thoughts.
Bats doesn't really do music ... but it doesn't hurt to ask. Well he did say no at first but after dick mentioning his thoughts about his parents and stuff. He reconsidered and ends up approving it.
Spooky decides picks the music until he realised he know nothing about today's music. So it look him a while until he found a playlist he seemed to find nice.
So the next time they're in the Batmobile, when the coast is clear and the night is saved and all they gotta do now is head home. Bats plugs in the USB for the songs and plays them.
Dick knows some of these songs. It's pretty popular in his time and there are some songs that he's not familiar with. But it gets him away from his thoughts so it's somewhat worked. He'll have to listen to it as this now their daily playlist.
The USB then stays there for a while even when dick is no longer here with Bruce, out doing his own thing. He didn't want to remove it.
And then a new Robin comes along. Jason asking what is that USB and Bats offers him if he wants to hear the playlist. He said yeah ofc.
1 min in he's thought to himself that Bats listens to popular songs, although these are kind of old. I guess he's somewhat the same like everyone.
And then Jason died.
USB was not touched again for a while until tim came along. Batman was pretty much on edge during this time, although curious about the USB Tim decides not to pry on it - directly to the man. Instead he sneak in back to the Batmobile during bed time just to see what's the USB is about. And then caught by Bruce himself.
Well he was mad at first but after realizing he was just curious what is in the plugged USB. Bruce decides to just show it for himself what it is about. Tim was definitely not expecting it to be a playlist. Bruce then asks if he wants to play this playlist. Tim just rolls with it.
Then Stephanie came along. She was pretty much straightforward asking what was in the USB. But Bruce was real defensive about it for some reason so Stephanie just shrinked back. He then realized his mistake and offers if she wants to hear the playlist. She happily accepts.
This time Bruce died.
Dick is now stuck with a kid he is not sure on how to handle. Stuck back in Gotham. Stuck in the costume he was trying to get away from.
He wasn't sure on how to do anything but he needs to do so anyways because he's the only one who can do it. This that happens and so the new dynamic duo was formed.
They then got in the Batmobile. And there Grayson is greeted again by that familiar USB. He thought he forgot, Bruce had changed Batmobiles a couple of time and with all that is happening he didn't think that he would remember to bring the inessential USB playlist into the new ride everytime.
He felt his warm all the same again.
Maybe a bit emotional.
But it maybe the inessential USB playlist gave him all the motivation and courage he needed at that moment.
He then stepped on the gas, drive out of the cave.
Into the night.
End note:
This was my playlist I was thinking about. U can check it out if u want! These are most of the songs I remembered that used to be on the car USB. Uhhh this ended up being longer than I thought I was gonna do like a short silly idea but hi if u reached the end 😅
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fairycosmos · 10 hours ago
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its so frustrating how difficult it is to get employed rn,, ive sent like thousands of applications since agust of last year and none of them called me back, even went to an interview and it went great only for them to not call me back 😭 im dying, i need a job but no one is hiring wtfffff!!! !
goddddddd fucking tell me about it. even though my current job is toxic as fuck im dreading when the temp contract runs out and im back in the job hunt. i've tried really hard to adapt this mindset of like detachment when it comes to interviews and stuff because honestly most of the time you could be the perfect candidate and they''ll still ghost you. the job market is LITERALLY impossible rn and even the most qualified people are struggling so pleaseeee i know it's easier said than done but try to practice the skill of not taking it personally. and it is a skill like it will take time and patience to build up the mindset and that thick skin but it is possible. anyway a lot of places just put out ads to see what's out there with no intention of hiring or put out ads even though they're hiring internally/ already have a person in mind for the role........and atp most places are looking for someone with two degrees and 10 yrs experience and 30 different skillsets who can juggle the responsibilites of 5 different titles all under one entry level position for absolute minimum pay.......it is utter madness !! obviously it's a good idea to reflect on each interview and try to like optimise how you present yourself to the interviewer but most of the time it's just good timing and luck when they actually pick you. nothing to do with your abilities or who you are!! wishing you all the luck in the world on your job search, totally understand how crushing it is x
job interview guide / thread of real job interview tips
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