#so i couldnt watch it in full
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my reaction to sonic 3 post credit scene but as shadow because I had my very cool shadow hoodie on lol
#sonic 3#sonic 3 spoilers#spoiler#shadow the hedgehog#now ill be the one littering places with spoilers for everyone else#ill remember to try and tag them though#NOBODY commented or reacted on my shadow hoodie >:( at least not within my ear- or eye-shot#maybe one kid trying to pick everyones attention about it but i couldnt hear him well#kept trying to make myself as visible as possible. smiling friendly and showing my bootleg sonic plushie i also brought and all#no avail#so since nobody was to match my freak i decided to do it all myself and go full out#my family isnt the type to stay on credits you see :( so when the scene started i decided to stay in place right before exit and watch#Forgive Me Or Not Father But I Shall See My Next Character Teaser Whether You Want or Not#also given shadow got the same ending as in adventure 2#it mustve been very fucking funny actually#to see a girl cosplaying as him tripping on stairs and almost falling#Helios Cinema we are seeing each other again in my full sonic freak mode in 2027#or whenever they announced the movie on#long post
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These two lines in the movie make me the most mentally unwell.
"I should have been the one to go. You needed your mother more than you needed me."
The amount of layers to this, oh my god. He's blaming himself for being alive. He probably wants to die. He genuinely thinks Adrian needs Emilie more.
And it's been YEARS since Emilie's passed away. Look how tiny Adrian is over there, he only just about comes about the bedpost. Gabriel still looks like he did in the pictures of when Adrian was little. It's been literal years. It could have literally been a full decade ago.
And Gabriel breaks the narrative here. He's supposed to be telling a story, he's supposed to be saying what happened in the past. But at this point, he doesn't say "your mother was taken from us" or anything like that referencing Emilie's passing. The story breaks, he's using a statement. I should have been the one to go. It's completely out of the story, because he isn't saying what he felt then, there's no "I felt like I should have been the one to go". It's just "I should have been."
Because he still thinks this. It's been about a decade, and his opinion, his feelings about this, is still "I should have died". It interrupts his storytelling because of how strongly he feels this way, almost like it's a fact to him.
And then he follows it with "You needed your mother more than you needed me." Again, he says this like it's a fact, like Adrian actually did need his mother more. Because he believes it himself. And this could be because of so many things. It could be because of the way people consider the mother to be the one supposed to care for the children much more than the father, or it could be that Gabriel himself didn't see how much Adrian needed him, or even that Gabriel didn't see himself as useful to Adrian. Especially because he said he should have been the one to die. He's essentially saying he was useless. That he was expendable but Emilie wasn't. He literally is implying he doesn't see any worth in himself regarding being a father.
And then it's not just his grief, it's Adrian's grief that has him desperate to bring Emilie back. He literally doesn't care about himself, he wants his son to be happy and doesn't see himself as able to do that. He loves him to the point of being suicidal and self-sacrificing if it would give Adrian what he need, all while simultaneously not seeing himself as what Adrian needs because he doesn't think he has that much worth regarding him.
#it is one am and i am on my shit#Gabriel agreste has made me so insane about him ever since i first watched the show#like he's unironically been my favourite character. probably because i wasn't able to watch the full level of his bullshit in the show#movie gabriel is exactly the character i wanted/envisioned gabriel to be and the redemption was exactly what i wanted#and i will randomly remember the movie exists and die inside when i remember this scne#and don't get me started on how many times he tightened his grip around adrian when hugging him oh my god#this man was so convinced he couldnt make adrian happy himself he didnt see that Adrian was slowly recovering on his own#and the fact that Adrian wasnt even angry he just understood he knew and he hugged him oh my god#adrian had finally learnt to let go and now he wanted his dad to let go too-and dont get me started on how he calls gabriel dad#also “you have to let her go” maybe its not just Emilie herself he meant but the idea of her and what she meant#like the idea that emilie was perfect emilie is what adrian needed that gabriel is nothing next to her#aughhhhhdhhshsjsjsshsh im going insaneeee#miraculous awakening#miraculous ladybug#miraculoustalesofladybugandcatnoir#miraculous movie#gabriel agreste#adrian agreste#chat noir#hawkmoth#hawk moth
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what ur favorite dsmp character. like i feel like its wilbur but i wanna make sure. my favorite is technoblade cause adowdiafjjef idk man i love him so much
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#further discussion in tags i wanted to keep the post empty for hilarity#YES SORRY C!WIL HAS CONSUMED MY EVERY WAKING MOMENT. MY WIPS AND MY GALLERY IS FULL OF C!WILBUR#hes so. he was selfish and he dared to dream and he wanted and he almost got it and he watched it all crumble before him through his hands#or anothers and he was back and he wanted to fix everything but he couldnt (like putting a bandaid on the crater) everything#goes unsaid everything gets stuck in his throat in the end he ran off again and there are only two directives for him: live (failed) and#learn (failed) and love (almost)#he is a fifty-thick layer of actor-metaphors and masks and costumes and roles to play. there is so much more 2 say but im running out of#words#imagine it like a sliding scale of favouritism and c!wil has gone beyond and is just sitting above the scale and under is c!quackity#-> c!SBI -> cranboo -> ccharlie -> so on so forth#i love ctechno too theres so much going on with the motherfucker (affectionate) i could draw him in So Many Situations too#and the fan designs are so >>>>>>>>>>#and the blood god imagery is SOOOOOO >>>>>>#the brutality and gentleness he is oft depicted in is SOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO#image stolen from Ratthew on twitter#hymns questioned
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I had a super sexy Jimmy dream and im so fckn happy 🤤
#it was him (like Robert California era) sitting in a full restaurant and he began pleasuring himself and everyone watched him and I couldnt#hold back and sat myself on his lap and made out with him while I gave him what he wanted ❤️🔥#godddd it was so hot#a thing which made me happy as i woke up
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question for those who have watched ror, how long would you say the song in betweens are? like how long does it take to get from one song to the next? since its a shorter movie i assume like-at most 15-20 minutes between songs???
#ive decided on 6 songs#i cut a few#keeping this is love as a short contrast song really so im not#really? counting it#but i was curious on how long it is between songs in the movie#because in d1? there is a very large gap between each song since#as ive realized#theres only FIVE SONGS in d1#not counting be our guest and if only reprise#same in d2!#i think ror has the most songs out of all the movies and yet its the shortest#i think d3 has 7#d2 has 6#and d1 has 5#im only counting full songs so short songs like happy birthday and the did i mention proposal dont count for me#yeah counting whats my name(cuz its made to be such a big thing even though its not the full song) and this is love(i couldnt not count it#that would be a discervice to brandy) ROR has EIGHT songs NOT counting shuffle of love because from what ive seen its not even really there#it slike played through bridgets headphones or something idk#anyway i was curious and heres my thought process for stupid shit for my rewrite#also watched Ror a little bit and the only song so far that doesnt feel forced or wedged in was red like#so this is love just-happens#and love aint it just HAPPENS??!?#LIKE THE SONGS MAKE NO SENSE FOR 'WHERE' THEY ARE#in all three descendant smovies-EVERY song actually made damn sense for where they were put#esp for d1 d1 had that song placement down pact.#bring back kenny ortega please
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why is no one on this godforsaken website blorboifying lon chaney jr as the wolf man in the 1940s universal monster movies. look at him this is like the definition of sopping wet poor little meow meow or whatever ppl say these days
#hes most pathetic in the sequels tho not the original#all the sequels (technically crossover movies with the other monsters but hes there) are just him trying so hard to kill himself#like theyre all him wandering around sadly like “please kill me i cannot live with the beast i become under the light of the full moon”#anyway. finally watching frankenstein meets the wolf man rn if u couldnt tell
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It's always interesting to hear about people's weird/unexpected "alternate life paths". Like, something that you could have done with your life, a job you almost took, a school you almost went to, etc - that was still actually realistic enough that it could have happened, but NOW it seems to not suit your current personality.
Like for example, I currently hate advertising (how manipulative it is, brands trying to be 'relatable', social media amplifying it to an obnoxious extreme, etc.) so much that even seeing a little ad before a youtube video is grating to even witness, but there was a point in time where I was genuinely seriously considering going into marketing/making commercials as a career lol. Or like, I have a relative who was very inclined to be a pastor when they were younger, even though today they're a super strong atheist, etc. etc.
#BECAUSE I knew I really liked filming and editing things and doing set design and costume design (from having done little bits of that#here and there in media classes and my own stuff - i used to be a lot more into making videos than I am now). BUT I was always thinking#that a movie is WAAY to big and long. even a short film. So I was trying to think of ways I could still like#have the fun of scouting locations to film and dressing up actors and etc. etc. without it having to be a Huge Million Dollar Production#on tv show or movie level. SO then I was thinking about like... just doing commercials. Or music videos. Like shorter things where I still#get the fun of the filming and everything but it's less of an intensive long term project.#So there is an alternate version of me (I suppose if i somehow did not end up having physical and mental health issues#as badly somehow.. or like.. randomly came into wealth and was able to pay my way through a nice college despite missing#days constantly being out because I'm sick or something lol) that works in some corporate advertising office coming up with commercials#and directing or filming them or doing the sets for them or something in that general vicinity.#I also was considering being a corporate psychologist. or whatever its called.. oh from google:#''Industrial and organizational (I/O) psychologists study and assess individual group and organization dynamics in the workplace''#I don't think I even knew what the job entailed. I was at the time just thinking like.. the type of person that comes into a business offic#and gives everyone personality assessments or does MBTI or big-5 testing crap for whatever reason that some businesses get that#done for people. Really i just wanted to be in a Corporate Big Office setting yet still do psychology. Because I used to be really fixated#on living in a big city. Like the ideas of everything being walkable. picking up a coffee in the morning. walking to my job in a Big#Skyscraper Building. people watching in a huge hotel lobby for lunch. flying frequently (I love airplanes and airports aesthetically).#living in an apartment with a giant window overlooking the city. etc. etc. BUT that was before i had really BEEN to a city. Then I actually#hung around a city a few times and went places and I was like... AUGh... The Sensory Overwhelm.. cars people lights loudness noise scary#everything happening all at once. etc. etc. (though even when I wanted to live in a city i NEVER strove for the Night Life. when i say I#enjoy city imagery I mean like... in the day time. Many people who like cities talk about The Night Life and post pictures of cities all#lit up at night and clubs and dancing and restaurants. none of that EVER appealed to me. perhaps a sign I am not a real city person. Like#I am NOT standing in a crowded bar full of loud people in the middle of the night lol.. get AWAY from me!!) but I do adore the#architecture of like bright white clean sterile modern spaces like huge airport lobbies or malls or etc. I think thats what reminded me of#city and what I liked about the idea of that life. Like I always LOVED the layout of schools and hospitals and trainstations and public#transport in general. Though even then I knew enough that I would not be a good architect/city planner. so I guess my adoration for those#spaces was merely to be channeled into LIVING there. but then I realized I didn't even really want to do that that much. I mean I still#definitely aim to live NEAR a city. like the little areas outside of it. I would never live in a rural place 4 hours from anything. I liter#ally just COULDNT since I need close access to hospitals sometimes lol. But I used to want to live in the CENTER of citites like high rise#condo. and now I'm like.... eh....... perhaps a smaller quieter walkable space nearby lol.. ANYWAY.. alternate me in my Business Suit eheh
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like if u asked me hey joelle what have u been up to the last three months that have kept u from bein a full time blogger has it at least been fun or productive. id have to be like. i dont fucking know. ive been watching a lot of movies on the couch
#and playing a lot of pokemon until the switch killed my hands#then i remembered i could put the switch on the tv screen and kill my hands less. but then i couldnt watch movies so i stopped doing that#have u at least been more present in ur life w the less screen time. no. have u kept on top of ur self care tasks. no.#but the movies are fun :)#i dont i simply dont know what ive been doing with my time bhsfg not anything thats made me feel even a little bit better in any way#so i guess the patient does need full-time blogging to live. ill get back on that at some point
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[Image description: A digital drawing based on María Álvarez from the film María, llena eres de gracia. There is a dull red border around the piece. Maria's face is only visible in a small square near the left corner of the border, looking off to the side with her hair messily drooping onto her face. Her mouth is open to show a sliver of her teeth, but her expression is unclear. This square is situated above a drawing of Mary - mother of God - but the angle is off and the elements don't align perfectly. Mary - who has a hand placed over her heart - is drawn with a blue, hooded robe atop a long-sleeved red shirt with a gold trim. She's wearing a doubled-up pearl necklace, which resembles the halo that is around both of their heads. This halo is made up of white, wrapped-up pellets of drugs. The background for Mary is a blue colour while María's is purple. On the border, the phrase "nombres/given name" (which is usually present on Colombian passports) is written, and below the border, in a larger text, it says "llena eres de gracia". The lineart is a thin, invariable, and dark blue.]
Inktober - Day 7 (Passport)
Film - María, llena eres de gracia (Joshua Marston, 2004)
#inktober#inktober 2024#maría llena eres de gracia#maría llena eres de gracia fanart#maría álvarez#maría álvarez fanart#maria full of grace#maria full of grace fanart#digital art#this was the film i studied at a level spanish so tbh i couldnt weigh in on the true merit of it#like i enjoyed it and i thought on rewatch all of the symbolism is very rich#and maria is a brilliant character (blanca also grew on me in rewatching it which was controversial in my class)#so i would say worth a watch defo but i gen have no idea how it would be recieved outside of how i studied it#brilliant performance for defo tho#song of the day is heaven up here by echo and the bunnymen <3#(the first and only band so far ive seen live so very very good#i love the way mac sings in this song i love fun and interesting delivery in music
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BenzGarfield at the presscon for This Love Doesn’t Have Long Beans
(x, x, x)
#i am going to sleep now i almost couldnt remember the damn title when typing this#hoping one of the news channels uploads to YT quick so i can watch a full recording over breakfast#this love doesn't have long beans#benzgarfield#benz atthanin#garfield pantach#i love them i love them i love them#kentakim au in my mind fr#pit babe cast#change2561 cast
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...
#oh lads. lads. lads. lads. im being sucked back into the world of academia#i dont even kno what happened. a week ago i was crying bc i was like: this is impossible. i simply cannot do this.#and then i went into the lab sunday and miraculously i was able to easily read some papers. like i dont kno how to discribe how baffling it#was. like reading papers is like pulling teeth and this was somehow easy. i think maybe it was bc i let myself get distracted and wander#thru it. and then after that i got so much done this week and i was tired but having fun. and like the thing is: i fucking love evolution#it's like puzzling out the code for life in both a metaphical and literal sense. its fucking incredible. and my project is also very#interesting. if a bit intimidating in its scope. ya kno. just in the way photosynthesis is generally intimidating#but i think i have a strain thats lost chlf which is really interesting and my advisor said we might have the money to try some crispr for#my cyano children. hypothetically. maybe. and i get to do some poking around in genomes. theres so so much to love there#how could i possibly want to do anything else? and yet. and yet. here at the end of the week im so wrung out and i kno i just have to start#again on sunday and i kno im gonna have to step it up in terms of reading if i want to make it through a committee meeting and proposal#defense. not to even mention a comprehensive exam. and what do i get at the end of all this? a lifetime of academia draining my life away.#bc what i do is so academic. so whats the point? its just so frustrating.#and on top of that ive got all this data from my old lab that i kno i have to work on. and i will. i will. but with what time?#anyway the point is. i can see a path forward now where i stay here and decide the pain will be worth it despite not knowing where im going#after that. im just so tried#but right now it feels like im gonna stay until someone kicks me out#but that doesnt exactly make me feel happy. ugh. but if i stay i want to get my old pi to come here and give a seminar. ill warn her how#intimidating the department is tho. we've had 2 talks in the last 2 weeks that were... not good. particularly the one this week#like she couldnt answer a single question they thru at her and didnt seem to kno her data sets. it was hard to watch. anyway. i just want#to see my academic mother again. send me back to the desert! let me rot in a field full of sage#but send me back to the hills of an older mountain range. where i can climb sandstone cliffs and lay in carpets of moss. except i wouldnt do#that bc of all the ticks and threat of lyme disease...#anyway. im still tired. still sad. and there doesnt seem to b a way out#unrelated
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my verdict on the day of the doctor novelization is that the plot is still so stupid to me but at least i can live my life knowing moffat can write ten marginally correctly but he only keeps it in a novelization where nobody is going to see it. (my personal highlights under the cut)
him. aroace
this is a really good take on the ten and river dynamic, they're acquaintances and ten purposefully keeps it that way. the "time can be rewritten maybe her horrible death that happened in front of me can be prevented if i stay away from her" really goes well with how he's left after the events of journey's end
"he had to stop thinking before it tore him apart!" is THE most ten narration i've seen in my life. i need to eat rocks
this part just makes me really really sad. the dissociation between the tone and what's actually happening (him getting tortured. for months). how he's so clearly not acknowledging what's happening to him (he won't describe the screaming as his own). how he latches onto the only other presence there and focuses on charming her and making her laugh??? this also makes the hinting at a romance between ten and elizabeth that moffat does, extremely fucking upsetting because you can see how ten is just so fucking lonely and on instinct attaching himself to anyone who has any amount of regular presence to him. even if. well. you know. the torture.
like this. see. i need to be shot
you will hear from my lawyers steven.
[coughs up blood]
the "over and over". i need to be put in a blender
AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAH
#i say marginally. it's not perfect. but he manages to get ten's general vibe down well and wow i didnt know u had it in u dude#manic and melodramatic. talking himself hoarse. pacing everywhere. repeating what he's saying over and over#simultaneously fearing and embracing death. full of so much love and anger and grief. like yeah .. thats my boy... he is here..#but the queen elizabeth marriage plotline is still. Annoying ! (i can see v clearly that moffat is trying to do like#a madame de pompadour 2.0 re: queen elizabeth in the novelization and it's like. steven he's aroace we've established this)#and i still. dont like what this overall story is trying to accomplish! but this is the fault of the episode the novelization cant fix that#but besides the expected gripes i have it was much more enjoyable to read than watching the actual episode#the structure of it was fun and does a lot in making use of the written medium that u couldnt do in tv live action#dr who#10 era#11 era#aspec doc tag#also realizing all my highlights are a singular aroace ten moment followed by ten being the saddest wettest beast you'll ever see. lord
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every time the new guy at work does something so unbelievably brainless that all i can do is stare at it with my mouth fucking hanging open, all i can hear internally is when he confidently told me "yknow, [perfectly competent other coworker] hes just not all there. he just acts without thinking. i dont do Anything without thinking it through first. 😏."
#i just watched him test if the condiment dispenser was working by literally just Pouring mayonnaise out of the machine and onto the counter#while the little cups we use to catch and hold the stuff was literally an inch away#i try to be so nice but i couldnt help it i full volume went WHAT are you doing.
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watching ap bio past season 1
#ada speaks#im sorry lynette i cant stand any episode youre in i need more of jack hanging out with mary stef and michelle or his freakass students#it becomes so hit or miss but god there are some really good hits still 😭😭😭#i cant even explain what is wrong with lynette and jack other than the dialogue and Vibe is so rancid it makes me avert my eyes#i don't even think it was this bad on my first watch#what do you mean you guys are more like cousins. how are you as the writers acknowledging this and yet still.#anyway there are like. i think its the third episode to the sixth? unbearable#i think i remember the finale of s2 being them getting together but at least i get to see glenn breasting boobily thru the hotel hallway#i cant fucking stand how s1 effectively ended with jack being like. i like these little fuckers. and then this season is.#yeah anyway forget all that my arc is that i will grow to like toledo bc uhhh this is my conflict with lynette now. bc ofc the only reason#that a man would do Anything is for a woman he's obnoxiously in love with#nevermind the fact that they fucking had this same arc for him last season and the episode where he was like yeah fuck it#i actually Like my weird coworkers and im gonna go hang out with them instead of this miserable woman#not that lynette goes against that. but they couldnt even stick to anything relevant to like. being from toledo#shes just this. quirky snarky woman who also for some reason really loves her home town. we dont even know shit about her.#i legitimately think the biggest misstep is not having her more integrated with the other women in the show#because as it is her literal entire character revolves around jack#she shows up to interact with the rest of the cast and remind us she's working at the school only to have jack check her out or some shit#like ok. contrived plot device of a character#im going to stop talking about lynette now im sorry i wish she was written better LOL#in a show full of really fucking enjoyable women she is certainly. there!#i think its literally just like. it irks me so much because jack is just like. Waiting to get through the 'friendzone period'#and we barely see lynette after she tells him they should just. be friends. like ok. show them being friends then#she can be fun when shes involved in some crazy scheme. but no. only when its about this ~sexual tension~ is that allowed
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#shenanigans going down in the kings harem 🤪#this was so crazy tommy really went full sun king picking a new mistress in that episode#peaky blinders#tommy x michael#tommy shelby#arthur shelby#john shelby#michael gray#im posting all my drafts if you couldnt tell#i havent wctually watched peaky blinders in like a year
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They should make a support group for kids who had too much unrestricted internet access as a kid because it is just so complex. I also do not want to bring up pony.MOV in an expensive therapy session.
#been watching rainbow dash presents and MAS and listening to some old pony songs#i heard 5 seconds of love me cheerlie and i suddenly remembered what being a kid was like#its kind of sad how much my childhood was full of online stuff that i couldnt even process but then again my brain was fried with grief#at the time#good god though#but!! on a lighter note i loved and still love rainbow dash presents#i didnt even realise it was based on fanfics until i was halfway through it as a kid#i was a bit dense#but i was 8#but their Rainbow is... very me i love her#pinkie also#i realised thats why Gay Bar is so familiar to me because pinkie sings a snippet in it in episode 2#anyway#YEAH 2012 was a great year for me but i was so weird#cookie rambles#mlp#my little pony#sonic#sonic videos were very this#nostalgia
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