#so i cant be like i freak out over nothing lol!! bc i dont. things do happen to me. frequently

[owleics-fr]

Hi i need someone to tell me things r gonna be okay lol

[crushedsweets]

i am so so sorry for the sheer amount of headcanons i'm making you crank out, HOWEVER... i am so curious as to if you have any headcanons for nina and natalie as a duo. i love the way you perceive them and write them it genuinely makes me so happy

i had to doodle them . ok. lets go..

nat was one of the first people nina met from jeff, since she and jeff lived in the barn together.

nina thought nat was a lesbian when they first met . that is literally the only reason why she wasnt mad jeff was living with a woman.

although nina was like, one of the ONLY people to notice toby/nat tension and was sooo heartbroken when she realized they were never getting together..... but then was relieved they didnt get together when she got over jeff because 'well i can't be the only single one!'

again, natalie grew up with 0 girl friends, only hung out with her brother and boys. even after meeting the creeps, theyre still mostly guys. so she's just kinda really awkward and weird around girls. not in a like, 'oh girls r so annoying' way but like... she just doesnt know how to fit in. she just feels so different in the worst possible way and always has.

and nina is very girly, outgoing, touchy, friendly, cute, etc. so it was very like UMMM?!? idk. natalie kept snapping at her, assuming she was fake and weird and just trying to get something from nat, but nina was so persistent and just. friendly. it started making natalie feel warm.

nina's presence started to heal natalies inner little girl. she had it stolen from her time and time again, from her dad, her brother, her peers - the operator, too.

so the two are eventually actual friends. they'll text and play mobile phone games together. sometimes they'll just sit on call and nina will be talking her head off while nat does her own thing at home. one time nat was at tobys cabin and nina was talking about toby on speaker and toby walked in and was like 'hey nina' .... nina almost threw up she was so embarrassed.

nina loves visiting nats bar because everyone is always talking to nina and giving her attention and buying her drinks, and at first nat was irritated but it kinda got nat some better tips since the customers started realizing ninas her friend. so nat was pleased. LOL

nat was never the type to go shopping, but she'll follow nina around and sit while nina tries on clothes and carry around all her bags that she buys LOL... ninas made jokes about nat being boyfriend material and nat just flatout says smth about how nina should get over jeff cuz he would never.

nat is friends with jeff but she's oddly comfortable just telling nina that he's a piece of shit. and ninas always like NOOO U DONT GET IT U DONT SEE WHAT I DO and nats always just .. not... impressed..

nina's always inviting nat out to try new foods. nat grew up just eating bread and noodles with butter half the time so it's fun. nina always tries to pay bc 'well i invited you!!!'. sometimes toby tags along but he feels a way abt going in public places..

nina rarely visits jack cuz she has no reason to, but nat is friends with him so sometimes nina pops in and she's always like ^_^ HELLO TALL MYSTERIOUS SLIGHTLY MONSTEROUS MAN... <3... nat smacks the back of her head cuz she's being dumb and drooling over a bunch of rando freaks. ... . ok i love nina and she owes jeff nothing but she is def not loyal LOLLLL AND SHE HAS THE RIGHT TO FAWN OVER EVERYONE she's a fangirl at heart.

they watch a ton of shows together. nina got nat into horror kdrama stuff, but they have to watch in dub cuz nat cant read the subtitles fast enough . . . at first nina cringed but now she doesnt care.

nat's painted/drawn nina several times, and nina almost cries everytime. she's put the drawings up on her wall before but anytime nat's at her apartment, she takes it down bc 'i dont want my art on ur wall stop it' LOL... kinda rude but whatevs.

ugh theyre just so fucking cute guys im sorry i love them . holds them. brushes their hair.

[figula]

this evening was a bit of a :|

a few hours after clare left benno told me that tmr we're gonna have to have a pub lunch w/ his family so i immediately freaked out bc this additional Thing on top of seeing boops & his gf last weekend + having clare this weekend (after like, 3y of nothing, bear in mind, so EVEN THO i was so happy to see them both it also took a decent amount of time to like stop being anxious + come down from that spike. like im still a little keyed up now. they both follow me on here btw + none of this is news to them i hope lol. i love u both im just insane x)

i got so angry (not at ben but at the situation, through fear) that i juts stopped talking and went away upstairs to lie in my bed to try and calm down alone

a few mins later ben came uptsairs + i immediately was like "i really just want to be alone actually" then realised he was crying so i was like ...ok come in (crying trumps general rage in terms of Need i think)

we think it's a long-term mental effect of the pandemic where he gets rly emotional after a social event ends bc it reminds him of like the 3y where it was just us in this tiny little universe + he panics bc i think he goes like straight to that place in his mind where he's just never gonna see anyone again? like every goodbye feels like it's gonna be forever

so anyway he tried to get me to talk about MY feelings during this time + i was just like sry i cant lol. you know when you're hollowed out inside through a combo of rage / general madness / having to remain compos mentis for someone else who needs you. AINT GONNA HAPPEN

so after that settled down i did message him on discord like "love u, not angry, will talk to you later this eve about MY feelings" (+ did stick to this obvs)

think the general sticking point is that while ben seems to have been a bit traumatised by lockdown + the social isolation i found it incredibly incredibly easy + stress-free, + have found the slow transition to normal life v difficult (and still do find it both difficult + incredible to watch in the sense that we're all just pretending covid is over bc like it's easier ig??). ill just c/p what i said to ben here: "if you found the lockdown unexpectedly traumatic I found it lovely and have found the return to normal really difficult & think people are just pretending we're back to pre COVID times when we aren't and I find that cognitive dissonance very hard to deal with, I also can't stand gatherings based around food anyway as you know and it seems to literally be all that is ever on offer and it struck me in the same way as the pret in Portsmouth or you being invited out for the meal when my sister was here etc busy couple of weeks that filled me with huge levels of anxiety and stress, thought tomorrow might be a bit more low key but no, got to to do something else I fucking loathe just very fed up and tired"

he asked me again to talk to him more about my feelings instead of just suddenly crashing when something slightly unexpected happens - i said yes - i think im just confused by how much he wants me to talk to him about LOOOL like if i told him every single anxious thought or w/e id be talking to him 24/7 and it just feels like i dont know which thoughts are the ones to share + which aren't???

anyway w/e it got sorted out w/ solid communication i think tbh like ben says we wont do the lunch. i said that he could do it if he wants but there's not a chance in hell im stepping foot into that pub lmfao like there are so few things he wants to do that i actually refuse (hopefully if u read my blog regularly you will understand that this is true) but i have reached my limit on Events Not In My Comfort Zone, and idc if he wants to do it, he's welcome to, but i will walk around the village during that time he was like "ok that's not gonna happen sweetie bc they'll think you hate them" so we're just not doing it. i do feel bad but also i literally like cannot do it? like i am just fully comfortable in the knowledge that i cannot do it, will not do it, and am simply not doing it. so if that means ben isnt gonna do it either that's just gonna have to be how it is. like not to be dismissive but ... this is how i am + he picked me knowing that so like.

OK loads more shit happened in the hour i took away from this post, benny thinks it might be worth postponing the woods trip just bc he's worried how to spin the lunch thing (whereas im like if you want to tell them im insane just tellt hem idc) but we had a good chat in bed + i love him a lot lol. i do like how good we are at emotionally comforting each other. i think we should 100% go tmr but he's a bit fragile (see above lol) so ill just defer to him on this one, im not exactly in a position to be like "JUST POWER THROUGH!!" hahahhaha anyway we'll see how he's feeling tmr. he's more cheerful now anyway bc we had a nice chat + committed to making some post-wedding plans as well so he wont feel that giant post-event freakout that seems to be plaguing him atm

[thegongoozlerreacts]

Cemetery Mary: Reginald's Route Part 2

now i am going to go get Reginald's good end! the bad end was,,,, it was,,,,,,, bad

anyways to get the good ending i'll just do the opposite of what i did the last time (and follow the ending guide lol)

spoilers belowww

ok so ive mostly been skipping thru everything and for some reason??? i keep ending up on the wrong routes?? like i accidentally got on the twyla route then the Crowven one like oopsies

not sure what i did wrong tho ?? i'll just start over

ok now im on the Reginald route, going shoppinggg time to get one wrong thing just to see what will happen ok nothing much happened just some dialogue

now to bring up the axe (bro he is so sus)

the cursed manga still freaks me out i skipped thru the church part but it still freaks me out also why did those people at the church look at Mary weirdly also im really curious about the black goo stuff,,, will i get an answer for it in the true ending or on the good end of this route?? im wondering if i should get the true end on Reginald's route (but it doesnt rlly matter which route i get the true end on since it doesnt change much apparently)

that part where Reginald gets mad at his neighbor makes me wonder if he's only super nice to Mary and around Mary like is his behavior different around other ppl when Mary's not around??

aww asking Crowven to stay,, cute

THEYRE SO CUTE AHHHH

now for Mary talking to the priest at the church,,, an interesting thing about this route is that Mary never realizes her ghost-communication powers, just gets caught up in some weird curse/wish thing in the form of defaced shoujo manga and a mysterious headstone

thats nice of him no threatening 'I'll make her be sorry' comments just him showing up w an umbrella

in the restaurant scene why does Mary see black goo come out of the mouth of Reginald's victim just another clue that the manga and the grave are connected to Reginald i guess??

OUCH

i tried to call twyla in the part where Mary needs to sleepover with someone interestingly u literally cant LOL twyla doesnt answer that makes sense tho

oho?? this is new a headache huh? and that music from the church when she was super sick is playing too ooh will she discover that Reginald's missing or smth?? learn more answers regarding the manga and the eye and the grave???

oh her phone is missing?? did Reggie take her phone? since he told her about the flashlight and Mary was like 'did he not realize my phone has a flashlight?'

maybe he took her phone bc its flashlight is bright enough that she would see that he isnt in the living room, unlike his flashlight

i am very incredibly nervous

OH WTF??? IS THIS HIS POISON MIXTURE?

hey maybe his antifreeze-poison thing is a mixture between antifreeze and rat poison since twyla said that it was 'some kind of' antifreeze that had a purple label but they werent able to find anything like that so maybe the label was actually a rat poison label???? or maybe im wrong LOL

ooooh it changes??? i went back and picked the middle 'grab something' bc i wanted to see if it was the same thing

it wasnt, obviously but also IS THAT MARY'S HAIR?? WTF???

what's the third thing

OH MY GOD

ok im gonna,,, im gonna continue with the first option that i picked if Mary doesn't discover the other stuff then i'll just re-load those saves and see

MARY DONT SMELL OR DRINK THE STRANGE LIQUID MARY?!?!??!

ah ok so she put it away and then u can pick to grab the other stuff alright

Mary dont rationalize the pictures,,,, they were taken without ur consent or knowledge Mary,,,,, Mary these are red flags Mary,,,,,

OH MY GOD ITS HER MOM'S NECKLACE ISNT IT OHHH MY GOD.

if i slept in her parent's room then this would be her plushie right?

"Is the Reginald I know... even a real person?" lol. lmao. no.... hes not,,, sorry Mary,,,

I KNEW HE HAD SMTH TO DO WITH ALL THAT WEIRD STUFF!!! I KNEW IT

jumped when the mirror broke lmaoo

oh god. i hope he doesnt catch Mary

oh no she's trapped :((( nooo Maryyyy

BBBBBBRRRROOOOOOOOO

oh fuck. oh no. oopsies...... i missed the quick time event im,,, Mary i am so sorry

bro wtf stay away from Mary?!?!??!

"It makes me sound like I'm crazy" my good sir you are crazy you are absolutely insane

"No matter how many times it happens" so there is time travel happening

that IS true i cant deny that but also,,, u like,,, thats not how u do it Reg

"You... love funerals so much. ...So I tried to provide you with as many as I could!" oh so THATS why he kills people ok,,,, ok then thats

yeah thats definitely not how u do it

how many times has he been like time travelling or like,,, looping i guess?? is it a time loop?? maybe??

HHHUH WHAT WHAT WAS THAT??? I DIDNT GE TTO READ IT?

i think it was purple text that said 'well since you asked so nicely' but im not sure?? im just assuming cuz she's out now so is Reginald behind the purple stuff? probably but like maybe its not on his side?? woah first time that some creature presented with purple is doing some good(?)/j

help?? Crowven??? i mean like yeah i would too but lets slow down for a sec

what the hell he just disappeared? and everything he owned too??

well that was a wild ride definitely more confusing than all the other routes and no ghost-communication too (unless the eye and purple text were ghosts?)

well im gonna process this ending, maybe ramble more to my brother bc he doesnt know anything and its funnier to theorize around him

i think im also gonna try to take a screenshot of that one purple text bc im curious abt it

next time i'll be playing i wont skip any scenes, and i'll be getting the true end on Crowven's route

[boldlyvoid]

Hi Em, i know it’s probably none of your business but i feel like i need to talk about it with someone and i honestly have nobody else to talk to :( i sent you an ask about thinking maybe im autistic like two years ago (late 2020 ish) and i cant find it again but basically ever since your answer i cant stop thinking about it and i honestly havent been to a psychologist bc im scared maybe she’s going to confirm it to me. I have been reading about symptoms and watching people talk about autism and i relate with so many things they say so idk, it gives me so much anxiety and im honestly so scared.

Also i hope this doesn’t trigger you but i talked to my mom about it and she was like ‘lol you’re definitely not autistic, you graduated from college and you’re clever and not incapable of doing things on your own’ and that made me really sad so now idk how to cope with it :( im so upset

the best advice I can give you is that you live in your brain 24/7 you know yourself well. you wouldn't look at your broken arm and think oh it doesn't look like most broken arms so it mustn't be broken. you'd feel the pain and experience it your own way and know that yes, this is broken. you know when something is up. you know when you have nerve pain or when your feelings are hurt. so if you look at yourself and you look at what it takes to be diagnosed with autism and you think, "hey that sounds like me" then that's totally you. you don't need a doctor's permission to say you have a broken arm, you fuckin know when the bone is popped out. so why can't you say you're autistic if you feel so as well?

as for your moms response that's very rooted in ableism but also autism is a hereditary thing, so your parents most likely have some kind of neuro-divergency that makes them see you as quote-unquote normal but that's only because it's their normal too. like my mom thinks its normal to get in her car and drive and not remember how she got to work because she was thinking about too much other stuff... as if that's not an adhd thing? it's totally normal to her... and my dad being able to hear every sound in the house and freak out over the smallest inconvenience is normal and "just man things" and not him becoming overstimulated from his autism....

your parents dont know you as well as you know yourself, if Autism feels like the right diagnosis for you and if you can ease your everyday life with accommodations specifically made to help neurodivergent people, then there's nothing wrong with that. live your life the way that will help you feel the best and fuck anyone who doesn't like it.

if i'm not following you and you want to message me privately, let me know and I'll do that, I'm always here to talk one on one if you need someone

[zukotheartist]

Hiii :) i need a bit of help

(Ik i said i wouldnt do rant posts here but this one is also advice seeking? So we'll let it slide this time)

It's about uni and mental health and jobs, etc and just overall oversharing lmao. Feel free to skip ofc lol but if anyone has some advice/opinions to share, im all ears.

Basically, i just really don't know what to do with my life💀. I even took a gap year in between hs and uni to decide and ig it still didnt work😭.

I'm in uni studying languages (mandarin, portuguese and japanese) and the language part is going well so far, I guess? (And I do like it!). I even like a few of the other subjects (some of them i only have them for 1 semester so theyre not major subjects) but i really just cant handle it???

I wasn't happy with my choice in the sense that I think my job prospects after uni won't be great but I knew I wouldn't be able to handle anything else (im terrible at stem and most high-paying jobs require it lol + i have depressive episodes 24/7💀 and im pretty sure i have adhd*). But even picking smth i like and am not terrible at (not great at either but at least it's not math lol) im not able to handle it???

I was trying really hard at first, i didn't want to fuck this up, but the rhythm needed is just... way too much for someone who stuggled all throughout hs and has shit mental health.

I managed to work hard for a bit (studying everyday after class, doing 8hr study sessions during the weekend, revising quickly while waiting in line, etc) but then i let loose (or even went full days/weeks with minimal amount of studying) bc it was so overwhelming and now im cramming like 2/3 months worth of 3 different subjects and my exams are in Jan/Feb (the first available dates on the 10th) and ill be lucky to pass a single one of them with the speed im going at.

Even on days i get up early to study and barely even look at my phone, it's just too much stuff and im not fast enough + i lack a lot of things bc of my slacking off in hs.

I go to uni in Italy and if you fall behind u have to pay more but ig it's better than putting all this effort and most of all money to then just drop out and be left degreeless?

But I feel so freaking terrible bc i literally dont even work part-time or anything and i still live with my parents and theyre the ones paying for all of my stuff basically? So to add a higher cost bc i couldnt keep up with uni🥲 but then, if i take a part-time job, ill be making some money but uni will be going even worst and itll still be a waste of money???

I've talked to multiple therapists/psychiatrists, asking them even for LIGHT anxiety meds and *all* of them have refused (I also made it clear that I would still go to therapy even if I got meds but nothing).

Studying calms me down a bit but even tho ive started doing it daily again and for hours on end, im still akskdkdkrkr

Ill talk to my family and my therapist but i honestly dont know wtf to do with my life. Ik the whole "dont cry over spilled milk" thing but i really wish i could re-do hs to not be in this fucking mess.

It doesn't really help that my only goal in life is to make a lot of money bc i think ill be alone (both romantically and platonically) forever but with the way it's going, ill be lucky to get a minimum wage one (im not saying it as a diss, those are respectable jobs too but like i said, my only goal is to make money so i can live comfortably and distract myself from my depression lmao).

This is all very specific and i doubt anyone responds (let alone reads) but if anyone does read, tysm for reading this sad long rant🫂🫂🫂. I pretty much wont be able to see my therapist until just a bit before my exams so this was also my way to let out some frustration.

.

.

.

*Ive tried to get an official diagnosis, and it's fine if im wrong ofc, but i was immediately denied and told that couldnt be it... bc of my age lmao💀

[youranxiousnerd]

Most Likely To Thoughts

because i am an angry theater kid

spoilers below

First of holy shit. That was one of the best episodes of the season. My second favorite (episode 5 has a special place in my heart okay?)

big red is awesome

i missed ABF this episode hes awesome

miss jenn you literally did the exact same thing 

“would you like to be the first” “im good”

ashlyn youre a cutie

oh my god guys they’re actually rehearsing

FRICKING GO BIG RED

EJ YOU KILLED IT

Gaston was ICONIC. 

the callback to 1x08

“monkies”

im sorry you guys haven’t blocked the 2nd act?!?!?!?! its MARCH the show was cast in January you’ve had TWO months i have been in shows blocked in less time

*angry theater kid screeching*

“It’s an expression, Sebastian”

Seb is going to snap one day. This is like the fourth time this has happened this season. 

Like he lowkey looked pretty sad and angry after that comment. Maybe the episode 10 Seblos fight isn’t going to be so private.

ANYWAYS back to the episode (i will gladly talk about seblos all day)

KOURT AND NINI KOURT AND NINI

they lookin good

kourt and nini have started a “relationships are hard” club and the members include big red, gina, and seb. ricky and ej pop in from time to time

kourtney that is a great lie well done

communication saves lives and obviously ricky and nini never got the memo

ricky no

did you learn nothing from nini and ej?

i do like how he immediately regretted it. like he knows he effed up

oooo ej, gina, carlos, and seb thats intersting

do not try to tell me carlos and seb dont hold hands in class bc they do

#giveusmoreoftheseforupleaseineedagroupchat

AIHFDAKFHGAL GINAS SNORT I LOVE IT

ej honey i think you like her

ngl i might have jumped on the portwell train

GINA LEFT BAHAHA

cash caswell

i hate him already

ej just sinking in his chair

carlos’ somewhat impressed face i cant

cash you son of a gun why

cash this is career day not show off your son day

ej noooo

“seize the day” theatre kids share a knowing glance

im shocked carlos didnt stand up and do the choreo 

miss jenn has a new man every episode omfg

mazzara is my fav

STOP

HOLD THE PHONE

THEY ARE DOING TECH WORK

I REPEAT, TECH WORK

IM A TECHIE IM FREAKING OUT OMFG

those are the nicest high school aprons like where are the ratty tshirts?!?!

how is sebs so messy

bitter seb

i smell tension

ope seb is mad

he is going to snap one day i swear

you can tell carlos regretted it or just doesnt understand what happened

im glad the seblos fight is building instead of something out of the blue

seb has been kinda pushed around this season im happy he is finally saying something

and no more seblos the rest of the episode rip

carlos go after your boyfriend come on

you know what would have been fun? they have their bantar while cleaning brushes and rollers in a clogged sink

ricky have you ever asked how big red is doing?

ASHLYN WITH A DRILL

OMFG GUYS I LOVE DRILLS YESSSSSS

why is there no drill piece in the drill what is she doing? is she bolting stuff or predrilling?

ash trying to be supportive

i love ashlyn guys

omfg two parents this episode what is this?

kourt’s mom being on her side love to see it

“i live to serve”

“i cleaned your desk a little” yep she’ll take you back after that

the shade kourtney is throwing im living for it

ricky just disappears and reappears

oof-okay richard

the pizza place fight. they were both in the wrong, im glad kourt shut them down

REDLYN NOOOO

i love them

ash is trying so hard and red is trying to get her to understand

mazzara you sneaky

i thought it was a date lol

miss jenn take the hint

PORTWELL HOME SCENE

that was really sweet, like go ej and gina, they have one of the healthiest relationships on the show because they learned what not to do.

thats a nice treehouse

lesbians build nice things

i should know

bc im one- ill stop

the treehouse scene-holy shiz. its amazing. props to josh and olivia, i was on the verge of tears. best rini scene of the season, hands down. it was beautiful

nini is sobbing i cant

ricky you can cry its okay

im so happy the breakup happened, major rini shipper in season 1 but they have fallen flat this season. it was handled so well and just gahhh

nini sobbing by herself 

NINA IM CRYING NOW STOPPP

roman sounds so good holy. 

like so good

this does damper my theory on ricky leaving halfway through the show and seb taking over as beast and singing this

MONTAGE TIME

“you’re gorgeous”

mazzara fell hard

“To Miss Jenn” why am i laughing

GABFILFBIWE PORTWELL

OH MY GOD GINA IS ASLEEP 

EJ AND THE HOODIE

GUYS I CANT ANYMORE IM LOSING IT

THE LITTLE SMILE WHEN EJ TURNS THE LIGHTS OFF

REDLYN IS BACK IM SO GLAD

you guys are adorable

howie fell hard

omfg ej

ej noo we love you pls be okay

redlyn you cuties

RICKY NO

IM SOBBING NOW

OMFG LOOK AT HIM

HE HELD IT TOGETHER FOR NINI 

GUYS IM CRYING I CANT

AHHHHHH

we stan big red in this house

ricky and the pillow no

glad ashlyn sticked around

i am dead. ricky thank you thats it.

like that broke me

i should not be crying over this i have already cried to much this season 

you know what would have made this scene better? seb just sitting on his bed then carlos texts him and he pushes his phone aside. something to show them drifting bc its happening and i need content

like where were they the second half?

ITS OVER

WTF

LIKE WHAT THE ACTUALLY HECK YOU CANNOT END IT THERE

WHAT IS HAPPENING 

As you can probably tell, I lost my mind this episode. I have no words, nothing at all. All I have is my tears. The past two episodes have been the best of the season. Episode 8 was another level.

[headofhelios]

Ok I am a single follower but I like hannibal tv but would enjoy ur movie thoughts I like some of the books too and have been meaning to get around to the movies 😳😳

OKAY I'M EDITING A READMORE ONTO THIS LOL I REALIZED THATS SOMETHING I CAN DO! so now my incredibly waaayyy too long answer abt my thoughts on 2002 will is under there. apologies bc this is less "movie thoughts" and more "2002 movie will thoughts" but well thats how the chips fell

GOD okay sooo for the record i am reading the red dragon book and am like 7 or 8 chapters in and full transparency im not like. enjoying it lol. the book pisses me off with its misogyny (all the women in it are either dead or it feels like you're supposed to think theyre Selfish Bitches or theyre just there for like. bizarre and uncomfortable sexual moments like the guys talking abt that woman in the elevator, or that one part of mrs. leeds diary which is like. i guess could be there to Show Her Humanity or whatever but 1. there are more ways to do that 2. the book doesnt seem particularly concerned with her humanity considering she's barely even given a first name and so far the novel hasnt seemed to disapprove of how will thinks of her as a possession of her husband) and its inconsistency with will's most important character trait or whatever (he's so intensely, extremely empathetic towards EVERYONE, even serial killers, which makes him really good at finding them! and he can never turn this off, to the point where every time he has a conversation with someone, he ends up mimicking the way they talk, even if he tries to stop! but also he never empathizes with the victims or HIS OWN FUCKING WIFE? HELLO? so it really feels less like "extremely strong empathy for everyone that he cant control" and more like "he can empathize with serial killers extremely well and also other people if we want to Make A Point in one scene instead of letting the point show through the whole book") BUT UHHH ANYWAY. MOVIE THOUGHTS. THE MOVIE THOUGHTS YOU ASKED FOR COMING RIGHT UP!

okay this is what i am worried will either 1. draw annoying tv will graham stans to my blog like flies or 2. end with me being hanged in the town square BUT. it must be said. i prefer 2002 red dragon will graham to tv will graham. and quite frankly? so far? i think 2002 red dragon will graham is better than book will graham. i cannot lie.

my reasoning: because 2002 will actually empathizes with more people than serial killers and his boss! y'know! like you'd assume someone with constant extreme empathy would! the difference between the first scene with molly in the book vs in the movie are SO striking to me now that i've read that part of the novel. in the novel he seems very... rough, i guess, and like he doesnt care about molly's worries. he doesnt seem to see things from her perspective, which especially feels like a kick to the gut because MOLLY! SEES! THINGS! FROM! HIS! PERSPECTIVE!!! she literally empathizes with him more than he does with her! what the fuck! MEANWHILE in the movie, he does seem to care about her. his assurances that he wont get too involved seem like assurances rather than him trying to get her off his back. he hugs her and tells her he loves her and i actually believe that yeah, he loves her, he knows she's worried about him, and he wants to comfort her and ease her worries. and the victims! AGAIN such a stark difference to me! in the book, will is like... uncomfortable empathizing w the red dragon, of course, but he doesnt seem to empathize with the victims all that much, ESPECIALLY not the women. he doesnt care about them. he sees them as possessions belonging to their husbands and its so fucking gross. despite already suspecting that the red dragon chooses families based on the women, he decides to waste time focusing on the husbands as a way of "asking permission to look at [their wives]." what the fuck? meanwhile in the film, he feels for the victims so much that he can barely even say that the kids were shot in bed! when he watches the tapes, he focuses on the women! because that's his fucking job!!! and we see him empathizing with them! wow!!

siiigh okay im gonna stop talking abt the book vs the movie now bc again im only like 8 chapters or so deep. but now we come to tv will vs. 2002 will, which is admittedly gonna be more subjective and part of that it bc i cant remember a whole lot of specifics from the show bc my memory is Very Bad. but anyway

let's get the shallow stuff out of the way. yes i prefer ed norton's face to hugh dancy's. call hugh dancy "gender" or whatever have your fun i support you and your right to call any blood covered man a gender but by god is that not even REMOTELY my experience. next shallow thing to get out of the way: ed norton's line delivery is like music to my FUCKING ears compared to hugh dancy's i am so sorry. like the jokes about will shaking like a damp chihuahua before taking 5 minutes to stutter out "he's killing them....... On Purpose, jack." are funny and all but christ i had SUCH a hard time watching the show bc of that im not lying. literally hearing 2002 will just say "he's not keeping them. he's eating them." nice and quick, matter of factly is better than well im actually gonna end that sentence there but you get the idea. like YESSS you little blonde bitch get to the point i love you!!!

OKAY NOW less shallow points but also less uhh idk man i just dont remember a lot of hannibal. but basically: after seeing how caring 2002 will is, i'm kind of... idk i'm just so over tv will and how abrasive and harsh he is in comparison. like i fell in LOVE with how vulnerable 2002 will is, how he feels like he cares deeply about the people around him (and honestly... idk i cant remember a moment in the hannibal tv series that made me feel the way i felt when 2002 will can't say "the kids were shot in their beds". it's like... yeah this is a guy who feels so deeply for everyone around him at all times. i believe that.) and i just dont remember getting that same feeling from tv will. i have been gently spoon fed the most excellent chocolate pudding and everything else in my memory is just a snack pack. i guess tv will has those moments (what comes to mind is when he brings gideon to hannibal's house and is crying and he says "please dont lie to me") but idk they just didnt really do for me what 2002 will does. and then their scenes with reba! wow! i rewatched the tv version after watching red dragon, bc the film version made me tear up, meanwhile the tv version i barely remembered and i wasnt sure if that was just bc of the different mindsets i was in while watching them or what. and ok i just rewatched the tv version again and like... yeah. it's the wills lol. i LOVEEE tv reba SO much she is giving everything in that scene!! she sounds so like... broken, both bc of dolarhyde's apparent suicide and bc of finding out who he was + what he was doing, she sounds so fragile and guilt ridden! she's amazing!! but will. idk. tv will's delivery just seems... idk this feels dumb to say but it sounds like writing. i admittedly LOVE the line "people who study this kind of thing say that he was trying to stop because you helped him." and his delivery there is good. but between tv "you didnt draw a freak, you drew a man w a freak on his back" and the 2002 version, the 2002 delivery seems more genuine while the tv delivery sounds rehearsed. idk overall the 2002 version of that conversation just makes me feel more? its like. idk i can feel the 2002 version gently holding my heart while the tv version is a scene that is nice in h/nnigram gifsets or w/e.

umm ok this is already suuuper long and my brain is getting a bit mushy so i'm gonna start wrapping it up lol. i'll probably compare book will and 2002 will again after i finish the book, and then i miiight rewatch hannibal, or at least parts of s3. but right now my thoughts are basically: book will is a fucking dick who has an easier time empathizing with serial killers than with his wife. tv will is a nothing girl after being so completely catered to + also idk he doesnt have the same fragility that i want from my wills now. and 2002 will is my little caramel apple. he has this delightful vulnerability and feels like he cares so much and empathizes with more people than serial killers and his boss and 4 people in a diner for one scene! 2002 will made me care about will graham! which is honestly kind of a feat!

[edengarden]

BNHA CONCERT BAND AU BC IM A NERD

IF YOU HAVE ANY QUESTIONS OR REQUESTS OR HEADCANONS AKSJHD PLS ASK ME I LOVE BAND I LOVE MUSIC AND I LOVE THIS-

Izuku Midoriya:

Boy definitely plays a wind instrument. I’m assigning him clarinet

Wants to be first chair so bad, he practices so freaking much I swear

ALWAYS. IN. A. BAND. ROOM. with Iida and Uraraka. They’re always practicing

He’s so confused with music theory, please help him. He just,, WHY is it minor?? WHY IS THERE A SOLO WITH NOTHING WRITTEN?? WHAT DO YOU MEAN HE HAS TO IMPROVISE WITH THE CHORDS WRITTEN OVER THE BARS-

Ochako Uraraka:

ALTO SAXOPHONE-

She’s also comfortable enough to play 2nd or 3rd clarinet if needed, or even soprano saxophone

Doesn’t have her own instrument, she borrows from the school and she HATES the reeds, they’re crap. When someone gives her a good reed, she CHERISHES it.

In jazz band also! With the same instrument, but she doesn’t feel ready for solos so she’s usually 2nd or 3rd. Bro when she has to switch from swing to straight she ALWAYS forgets and it’s the band’s downfall.

Tenya Iida:

TRUMPET TRUMPET TRUMPET TRU-

And he’s one of THOSE trumpet players, by the way.

“Sir the French horns aren’t tuned” yeah, he has perfect pitch

Literally plays flight of the bumblebee as warm up. Or has his own warm up scales. Never practices right before practice though, he thinks it’s “too late” for that

Has his own trumpet, it’s silver with hints of gold/brass. Takes care of it RELIGIOUSLY.

He HATES having to blow out spit onto the floor, but dude what other choice do you have??

Momo Yaoyorozu:

Sweet angel 🥺🥺 she’s an oboe player

Definitely bought her own instrument

Sight reading MASTER. she instantly gets the key bro, it’s so rare that she forgets an incidental

Definitely leads sectionals all the time. And she does it WELL.

When people (*COUGH* BASSES*cough*) slowdown, she’ll sway to the beat in hopes that they’ll follow her

Kyoka Jirou:

Electric bass or contrabass, give her either and she’s good to go dude.

Also has perfect pitch and knows her music theory WAY more than a high school student should know. She’s a genius.

Her warm ups? Jam sessions with Hanta and Todoroki. She just shouts a key and they go. It’s usually jazz, she plays a pretty constant pattern, Todoroki tries to improvise but hanta takes over pretty quick-

Definitely in jazz band as well. Also in a school competition band (like singer and stuff), also a one-woman-band. She’s in so many bands dude.

Shouto Todoroki:

TENOR SAXOPHONE

Also has a background in flute bc his parents wanted him to have ~versatility~

Knows all the theory in his head, like he knows what’s going on, he just doesn’t know how to explain it

*false note* “sorry my instrument isn’t warmed up, it’s probably my reed”

Has plastic reeds. And reeds ESPECIALLY for jazz.

Oh yeah he’s in jazz band! Loves that he’s like, the only tenor saxophone so he gets all the solos

Rikidou Satou:

TUBA PLAYER IN DA HOUUUSSEEE

Buddy actually brings the tuba home to practice, he drags that thing AROUND.

Always. Slows. Down. But no one knows it’s his fault most of the time, they blame Sero-

Firmly believes in the “basses are the foundation of the orchestra” mindset, he’s so proud to be a bass

Kouji Kouda:

Soprano Saxophone, but can also handle clarinet if the need comes (he just loves the sound of soprano sax you guys)

DEFINITELY in jazz band, but as a Tenor Sax 2 bc he knows if he went as a soprano sax he probably would’ve gotten solos

Is it Momo’s oboe?? Is it Kouda’s soprano sax?? No one knows the different except those two and Jirou

Plays Shostakovich’s jazz suite no. 2 as a warm up

DEFINITELY A SWAYER. He just gets into the mood of the music and SWAYS.

Tooru Hagakure:

Flautist!! She chose it as an 11 y/o bc it was a girly instrument but she really likes it lol

A mediocre player, she spends most of warm up with Mina tho, she thinks that she’ll get to warm up when she’s playing bc I mean— no one hears the flutes

Wanted to main the picolo for the sole purpose that it’s an Ear Destroyer. Aizawa heard the mischief in her voice and said no.

Sight reading?? What’s that?? She has no idea what’s going on, she just pretends to play and when she’s comfortable with the melody, she’ll just step in. NEVER notices key changes and signatures.

Yuuga Aoyama:

LASKHDSJ FLAUTIST!! Also clarinetist. He loves being able to stay where he is during practice even though he changes instruments it’s sort of funny

His cheeks get SO SORE when he plays clarinet though and he WILL complain.

“My flute is so heavy!” Kind of guy.

Definitely has his own instruments and takes GREAT care of them.

Wetting his reed with his saliva?? No, he plops it in a glass of water instead (the reeds are definitely his own, and expensive)

Tsuyu Asui:

Trombone gang bro.

Positions are burnt into her brain dude she’ll never go out of tune.

SO SMOOTH. SOOOO SMOOO- dude she plays so well?? It’s never spitty, but during jazz (yes she’s in jazz), if it’s a moody piece she KNOWS how to make it juuussssttt airy enough to be beautiful

Not that good with fast songs, but she makes up for her amazing ass vibrato and her range. GOD-LIKE RANGE.

Mashirao Ojirou:

FRENCH HORN!!!

Omg he plays like a king. And he’s so proud of being the ONLY one playing French horn, but there is PRESSURE, because a French horn is rlly tricky to tune dude. Have you SEEN it??

Always keeps his mouthpiece with him, as if he’s afraid someone will play his instrument?? Like no dude it’s good in it’s case but you do you I guess

He doesn’t stand out that much, but in the majestic pieces where he has a 5 measure solo?? He gives it his all and he pulls it OFF. Those moments are always the highlight of the piece

Mezou Shouji:

Bass clarinet!!

Once he managed to growl through bass clarinet and literally ALL the saxophone players were jealous AS FUCK

Buddy goes to a low E♭ like it’s nothing?? And then he goes up to like a high high C and you’re sitting there like THE FUCKING RANGE-

His warmups are like, quick scales and arpeggios. Bro he’s so steady when he plays and he could play for HOURS. Sore cheeks?? Don’t know her.

He so proud of being a bass clarinetist, but when he saw an octobass clarinet?? Aizawa better order one of those for him RIGHT. NOW.

Fumikage Tokoyami:

Baritone saxophone. Also lowkey really wants to learn bassoon because it’s such an old instrument

SKSKS he and Shouji sit next to each other, Tokoyami loves to read off of Shouji’s partition and create the WORST fourths you’ll ever hear. Even Midoriya told them to shut the fuck up once

In jazz band too!! Still plays bari sax

Such,, a good,, sound. So,, meaty,, and full,, and HOT. Bari sax is HOT!!

Plays moanin’s intro as a warm up. Search up the song. It’s bomb.

He loves to figure out new sounds with his bari sax. The Too Many Zooz type of sounds

Hitoshi Shinsou:

PERCUSSIONIST. Especially loves the bells, timpani, vibraphone and marimba.

He’s in the back judging EVERYONE. It’s so great for him, he gets to stand there and cringe and no one will know

Totally able to play 4 mallets like the king he is

Surprisingly enough, he’s rlly good in music theory. Like he could probably compose or transpose something no problem

Aizawa’s favourite, of course. Will ask him to sit in front while they play and circle the parts where he thinks something sounds off

Now that we’ve talked about the NORMAL band kids, I present to you,,, the gremlin band kids

Mina Ashido:

Percussionist as well!! She loves snares but you’ll see her pick up castagnettes even if y’all are playing something like Gymnopédie no. 3 she’s a bit confused but she got the spirit.

CANNOT READ SHEET MUSIC. Like notes?? No. She can do beats, just not notes. Let Shinsou figure out the ancient languages dude

Her and Hagakure don’t warm up, they just gossip together.

Did this to Bakugou more than once

SHE DROPPED SO MUCH EQUIPMENT LIKE HOW DID SHE NOT BREAK ANYTHING YET??

Denki Kaminari:

TRUMPET.

Buddy AIMS to have his spit land on someone sitting in front of him (rip Todoroki and Uraraka)

Thinks he’s cool because he plays trumpet, but he always loses count. God forbid Iida cant show up to practice because Kaminari will die

“Where are we? What are we doing? Which piece are we doing? Where are we starting?” Oh my god he’s so lost can SOMEONE please help him

Always gets in trouble during band camps dude. He and Sero are the Bad Brass duo

Eijirou Kirishima:

EUPHONIUM BABEY!! He thinks it’s so cool and he’ll get so insulted if someone calls it a “mini tuba”

DONT GIVE HIM SHEET MUSIC IN BASS CLEF HE HATES IT PLS JUST TREBLE CLEF

So!! Protective of his euphonium. His name is Johnny, by the way. He named his instrument.

When they finish practicing a piece, he’s the first to give feedback. Usually it’s good, like praises for classmates he heard and thought were really good!!

He’s so sweet. Willing to help others during practice and sectionals too!! It’s so sad that he’s literally on the other side of the room bc KAMINARI NEEDS HIS HELP-

Katsuki Bakugou:

Hehehe he’s a flautist. I’ve stood by this headcanon for like two years.

And he wants to be THE BEST. You never knew growling could be done through a flute until you met Bakugou.

CANNOT STAND slow pieces. He wants to go all out all the time, he always speeds up when the tempo’s slow.

Also in jazz band with what? Flute. Yeah, this is George Benson Time.

Will hit you with his flute if you ever think badly of him for playing flute. He’ll defend flute ‘till he dies.

Hanta Sero:

TROMBONIST!!! TROMBONE BABEY.

Will be so happy if he’s in charge of bass trombone?? Like yay??

Always wants to hit Bakugou’s head while playing.

Bro his playing style?? You know the like, lazy-ish trombone playing? But it’s just so full and smooth and heavy anyways? That type of shit.

In jazz band, he’s actually a natural at jazz, doesn’t practice that much so he’s like not even in a good position, buddy just slouches and sight reads.

I love Hanta sm guys I could talk abt trombonist!Hanta forever

[opens-up-4-nobody]

...

[phantom-bleu]

God PLEASE gush abt Timekeeper and all ur feelings abt them

ok lol *goes off* PLEASE THIS IS SO LONG im a little fucked up over timekeeper🙄 if u guys have any cool idea s. please . please talk to me

so croissant cookie tends to get bored with things over time and do more complex or daring things to stave off her boredom right. I think in timekeepers history, croissant did this by inventing more sophisticated and powerful time travel devices, eventually leading up 2 building the sonic embroider. which in principle is her finest work but in practice is way too much power 4 a regular cookie to have; the sonic embroider lets her see millions of years into the past and future, and see every branching path of the same timeline and go into an infinite number of other timelines on top of that, and the sonic embroider lets her do this in seconds. knowing literally everything that can possibly happen in the future, and seeing time on such a grand scale is too much for croissant to comprehend and still lead a normal life, so over time she goes completely off her rocker and many years down the line we get timekeeper who is deranged <3

timekeeper does not care abt gingerbrave or his friends, or most cookies because they can take a peek into a million different parallel universes where gingerbrave exists and in none of them does he have a grand impact on the timeline. I think that being able to see so many timelines that are all billions of years long massively devalues the worth of personal decisions or individual lives unless you have a huge historical impact. when u look at it the way timekeeper is forced to, the other cookies are just variables that decide if an outcome happens or not so its hard for them to empathize or show compassion because at the end of the day it literally does not matter if they do or dont. its like 1 drop of water in a sea of time yknow

i also think that bc of this timekeeper is perpetually bored and extremely lonely. nothing can surprise them bc they already saw that it was going to happen. they already know everything abt every person and have seen their life play out, so ppl dont interest them. destroying timelines and causing chaos and time paradoxes etc etc is probably one of the few ways they can entertain themselves nowadays because the very least thats something they cant predict the outcome of... and i dont think theyre just doing this to hurt others, they dont even seem 2 care abt their own life bc in the story croissant threatens to change history so tk never becomes the tbd director which would cause them to not exist.... that doesnt freak tk out at all though, in fact it excites them. so i dont think they do these horrible things to upset people, they do it for the adrenaline rush and simply dont care abt how it affects others, even if theyre the one affected

I think this is why they are so interested in croissant and having her join them bc croissant is unpredictable to them- there r plenty of times in the story where croissant takes timekeeper off guard, or moments where timekeeper says they couldnt have predicted something croissant does. And i think having someone who they cant predict, someone whos actually on equal terms as them for once is EXTREMELY exciting for timekeeper whos pretty much doomed themself to be one step ahead of everyone else.... croissant isnt one step behind them, so shes someone they can bond with almost like a normal cookie? and so they go to very extreme measures to get croissant to join them, partly bc they simply believe the ends justify the means but also because they are extremely desperate for a true companion

this is a silly one but: when croissant dropped cosmos gear into a time rift, timekeeper found it first, and time shenanigans meant they n cosmos gear spent years together and became the bestest of friends while only a few minutes passed between croissant losing the gear and going to search for it. hence why cosmos gear is both their pets at the same time, time travel means it can essentially be with both of them at the same time

this is also only tangentially related to timekeeper but hear me out. i think somewhere between making their first timecraft and the sonic embroider, timekeeper made a very compact timecraft which u can wear as a watch😏😏😏 but they were a little clumsy and dropped it in a rift somewhere and 1 thing after another happens and eventually the blue cheese family got their hands on it..... and none of them kno anything abt “tbd protocol” or like, anything abt the ethics of time travel, And theyre also huge assholes so basically they go around fucking with the timeline in ways that they definitely shouldnt which does Very Very Bad Damage 2 their history resulting in 1. the family completely collapsing and 2. roguefort and walnut getting trapped in a time loop in the future that they cant get out of bc no one has the power 2 go and undo the damage on the timeline :| thankfully timekeeper Does have that power etc etc etc 12345678910 abcdefghijklmnopqrs timekeeper/roguefort real *drops mic*

[littlebabycrybtch]

bro..... im sooo tired of ppl being whiny freaks about ppl liking fictional shit ‘~too much~’. like bitches are literally fully convinced if you prefer acting out certain ideas in fiction but not irl, thats not your normal preferential boundaries but rather your brain is a mental illness BOMB and you need to be fucking hospitalized for being imaginative and having autonomy. like yall if its not taboo or smth shut uuuuhp man you’re not ‘concerned for their health’ or w/e you’re fully just tryna get away with being a nihilistic asshole who lacks sympathetic reasoning skills. listen to me. fiction is valuable. the thoughts we have on it are important. the personal lack of value you happen to put on a media is next to worthless. its not a fuckin waste of time dude, creators are people, who live in the real world, they experience it and have ideas through it and about it, they form and tweak their ideas while still definitely existing in the real world, and then put that back into the world with a new angle and new perspective, to share with other people definitely encountering it in , you guessed it , the real world. thats not disconnected. its not nothing. these things do not magically appear from fairytale land, they are created. stories mean smth, people tell them for a reason, its ok to feel smth for any story, why would we even tell them if not with the intention to impact others emotionally somehow i mean??? fiction does not Just affect reality, it is valuable to real life society, it is a functioning thriving part OF reality. 

humans have told stories since the dawn of our existence. it is literally all but an inherent species trait for us to imagine things, its tied to each and every one of us, and to reject ‘fantasy’ as smth worthless to human life is frankly just fuckin wrong and weird of you. bitch we are Supposed to get outside the box, the fandom ppl you cringe your pants over arent thinking abt fake shit too much, you guys very often just arent exercising abstract thought and imagination enough, which actually hurts your ability to engage with it critically in all the ways its meant to be. if you dont see the value in fiction its because you put in no effort to form the analysis skills. in other words, you idiots dont get the hype bc you’re too stupid to get how you're supposed to compare a book to the real world it came from. ‘uu but cmon not everythings valuable what about [tumblr designated cringe media]-’ 1. ok! somehow you havent come to this conclusion yourself yet but thats not real, whatever ppl get to enjoy is not all abt you, your bias means less than dirt to others outside of hivemind social medias, you can keep it to yourself, ppl shouldnt care about it bc it means nothing outside of ur own space, its literally funny to me that you’re so elitist you want me to cater my interests to you, Your Standard Of Quality Isnt Universal, 2. ranking the values of fiction is the waste of time here, if you compare mlp to pride and prejudice ill dissect your teeth, different emotional impacts from tragic to funny to Just A Vibe are all able to be assessed as ‘valuable to somebody else so leave well enough alone’ if you dont have 2010+ funnyman brainrot disease that makes you incapable of reflecting on anything you can find a way to joke abt first.

i mean seriously like. whenever randos start engaging with medias you ppl dont like or in ways you dont get, the strawmans yall make up to get to be cringe culture vultures abt such benign shit, and almost Always at the expense of neurodivergent people with a deeply rooted undertone of extreme ableism might i add..... its just so selfish. u have a brain ok, you’re manipulative but we both know you dont Actually think ppl automatically default to being a waifu obsessed incel rotting away at their basement computer, stagnating their social skills and straying further and further from reality with each passing day, a poor disturbed wretch that you just HAVE to save from themselves, all bc they say they. prefer fictional porn or w/e to having sex irl. buddy thats not a big deal, theyre normal, just different from you. theyre fine, you’re just uncomfortable. as a functioning adult you’re gonna have to try and recognize that sometimes that feelings gonna be 100% on you, and you cant always just lie abt the validity of it to make ppl feel obligated into agreeing with you. this is gonna be one fragment of their personhood and your self obsessed brain imploding over how unrelatable that is doesnt fucking matter, grow up bitch like. how detached do you have to be to think thats so unstable or morally wrong.... its just a completely inconsequential preferential decision that only affects them and isnt a wrong choice at all cuz nobody has to get their dick wet if they dont wanna for any reason ever and thats gotta be that tbh.... and it kills me cuz they still inherently experience the real world and are capable of thinking abt it critically,,, even tho they... masturbate to drawings or w/e the fuck ppl think is unhealthy ???? like? imagination is just fun we dont need to moderate it anymore than we moderate other fun activities i mean lol ksdjfsd this is the DEFINITION of ‘just vibing’ no one FUCKING cares and it deosnt fucking matter the way you desperately try to make ppl think it does just so u get to be loud abt ur shortcomings as a decent understanding person. 

‘uuuuuu im sorry but thats unhealthy :///’ you sound like a goddamn maniac dude stories are not unhealthy having feelings abt them is not unhealthy thinking some anime bitch that was DRAWN TO BE HOT , IS HOT, is not UNHEALTHY and you clowns arent convincing anybody you ‘care’ abt that concept anyways !! im losign my mind here skdlsdfsd medias are literally DESIGNED TO DO THIS TO PEOPLE... WE’RE SUPPOSED TO FEEL THINGS FOR IT.... IT IS WHAT MAKES THE ART WE’VE TAKEN PART IN FOR CENTURIES, “ART”.... ITS JUST... HAVING IDEAS AND EXPERIENCING IMAGINATION..... whats wildly unhealthy actually is yalls toxic obsession with ‘harsh truth’ and validating your stupid ass cwinge feewings to the point where everything that gives your underdeveloped selfish ass hives has to be a matter of health and morals and whats ‘best’ for everyone. u dont know that shit!!!! ur a petty brat and im not ur mommy ok i wont baby you so u dont feel like the shitty whiny person you are, you need to grow and do better and think outside urself already, dont put the responsibility of making u feel right for judging somebodies benign hobbies on me. i wont bc its wrong and unnecessary. you’re not a savior no ones falling for that lmao you’re just a bitch girl xoxo get over it shit truly does not matter. let them write nsfw self insert fics instead of banging !! 

to make it real do yall really not Get that basic consent kinda doesnt just mean ‘no when im not in the mood at the time’ but it means ‘no if i just dont fuckin feel like having sex ever for literally any reason at all bc i choose what i do’ and pressuring them, even with what your warped brain translates as the best of intentions, is inherently disgusting? especially with the ‘i know how to help you’ attitude like......... ohhh die soonly ew lmao! lay off this nasty shit already please it doesnt matter! stop trying to make it matter!! its not hurting you or them you stupid tumblr phd ass!! and like again yeah some media shits just truly gross but tbr now its like even That kind of shit, the Real social issues caused by Actually problematic media that ppl should discuss Genuinely without ulterior motives, is being used more and more rampantly as just a stepping stone to get to the needless mockery of other harmless things in the media they want an excuse to bag on.......... like a bitch cant just be grown and talk about problems at face value without getting a bully jab in. smhhhhh you all fuckin suck please just stop talking already. so anyways yeah being attracted to fictional characters instead of real people or w/e IS funny, funny how many boyfriends they have when u have none xoxo theyre having fun and you can die sad abt it they get to die 5 times in an angsty fantasy fic and be brought back with mouth to mouth by fuckin kakashi every time and then they go get lunch irl while ur updating tinder bitch ... different fucking strokes ig !

[selfcareparker]

(lovely anon) ok so this may sound so dramatic but; let me paint you a picture: i’m responding to your latest message, sitting on the edge of the sofa. i type in “lovely anon” into the search and see this longgg post come up and i’m like uhhh... i scroll down and see the people you tagged and literally. when i saw @ lovely anon. i . cried . like full on tears. my brother goes “what are you doing” “she tagged meeeee” and he continued what he was doing and didn’t care LMAOO but i was so emotional? i love and appreciate you too and aAH IM CRYING!! you’re just really sweet and i didn’t expect it at all and it was really lovely to be a part of something :’)

the kermit pic sent meee but yes yes yes!! when you start uni let me know, lol i’m so excited for you!! let me know how it goes cuz i’m literally hype hahah & yes we will be in our sad corners of the world, missing england but you’re right it’ll be sooooo worth it in the end!!! and oH i’m glad you talk to them lol i truly thought you like haven’t seen them/haven’t spoken to them this whole time😭 that would’ve been awful!

also i totallyyy get what your saying about the english speaking thing. and idk why you’re insecure (well i *knowww* bc it’s not your first language and you’re studying it in college so yuh) but your english is great :)))

lol yeah that makes sense.. my mom took french in college and she remembers NOTHING HDJSHSJ (the fact that you wanna learn MORE languages i- ahh i so admire you.. you literally know so many languages🥺) yea i mean you know a bunch of languages bc you know the base of words lol, but i wonder if because you know latin it’ll be easier for you to learn french? oh- oh wait you said it’ll be easier HAHHAHA

THERES SO MUCH EXCITING STUFF TO TALK ABOUT HDGSJSJSL it’s so wild to me that you can’t watch chaos walking :( i’m a professional hacker tho so i’ll try and find a way for you LMAO (by professional hacker i mean i literally have gotten multiple free trials and i’m pretty sure the hulu police are after me bUT ITS THEIR FAULT BC WHY IS IT SO EXPENSIVE???) i mean the movie was good? and cute? and funny? but yea don’t think it’s gonna be the most fantastic thing haha AND THE DOGGO AWWW (i saw it again today- or my today lol, saturday, aND THESE OLD PEOPLE CAME AND SAT IN FRONT OF ME AND MY FRIEND LIKE ITS A LONG STORY LMK IF YOU WANNA HEAR IT)

SHARK FILMS?!?!! PLEASE READING THIS I HAD NO IDEA YOU WOULD LIKE SHARK MOVIES TOO FHSKSHSHDJDJGAJAYSJS ok so i haven’t seen any of the classics (i’m working on it) but i would probably watch jaws to laugh at it? not like that lmao but like comparing it. OKAY BUT HONESTLY I BARELY KNOW ANYONE WHO LIKES SHARK FILMS AHHH OKAY im adding “the shallows” to my watchlist bc it sounds super good AND SAME AHSJD ANY BODY OF WATER IN A MOVIE I JUST KNOW ITS COMING LMAO watch me not go in the water anymore after seeing that picture HHDJSJ

WHEN I READ THIS I JUST GOT DONE TALKING TO MY MOM ABOUT THE MEG AND THAT SCENE WHERE THE SHARKKK JUMPEDDDD AND ATE THE OTHER ONEEEE AND THEN JONAS HAD TO DO- bro i cannot (i think that one is my favorite because i love me a bit of romance and the subtle romance hAD ME) 47 meters down PHEW could you imagine?? i try not to think too hard about it i’m like “don’t be dumb catherine, don’t put yourself in a dumb situation” (not autocorrect having “dumb bitch” ready i am not lying) and i literally understand... there is no other way to explain 47 meters down

i CANNOT watch horror movies, can’t can’t can’t, i literally hate them i cannot do it!!! the thrill is tempting and it’s cool in the moment but i cant lmao. i don’t have nightmares about scary things (for the majority of the time) but going to sleep i’m like oooohhhhhh shit 🥲 literally what you explained

music !!!! music !!!! music !!!! (u ever write a word and now it looks weird lmao) MY BROTHER DOESNT LIKE MUSIC AND ITS SHIT IM LIKE WHAT IS WRONG WITH YOU- anyway, my music taste is all over the place i mean......... it’s crazy. earlier today i was listening to meghan trainor’s album “title” oUT OF NOWHERE, but just a few minutes ago i was listening to fall in love with me by earth wind and fire soooo lol .. megan is *chefs kiss*, i’m not familiar with stormzy🙈, harry styles.... IM SORRY IM THAT PERSON but i don’t listen to his solo music EEK i only listen to adore you... and not that frequently... the music video freaked me out... i like niall’s solo music a lot more, which i listen to a lot more. now. one direction. favorite. please & thank you. i have a playlist called “boy bands” and it consists of one direction and the vamps (obsessed with cherry blossom btw) but as you can see my taste is all over the place!! fr fr if i sent you what apple music has as my “favorites” it went from ariana grande to carrie underwood to glee (OBSESSED DONT LET ME TALK ABOUT IT) i mean please if you let me i will nonstop (hamilton HDJSH) talk about music all day😩 & NOOO UR MUSIC IS GREAT HAHSK IM NOT A BIG RAP PERSON BUT DOJA CAT IS MY FAVORITE!!

okay good, i’m glad :) i was just nervous that you did feel that way <3 and GOT IT HAHAJ healthy pressure is always good :’) my friend got me these pens cuz i love stationary and school supplies lol and was like “now you have to write something” soooo yea i feel that! and i saw you posted the ficcccccc literally so proud of you 🥺🥺 i’m trying to decide if i read it tomorrow or tonight..... sleep or a literal beautiful creation made by the sweetest person and is v v nice smut and college!peter and 4.7k...... sleep aint really calling no more.

GIRL ALL OF MY SENTENCES ARE TOO LONG HAHAHAH IN FACT THIS IS TOO LONG SOOO (also why am i 3 days late..😑) anywho it’s 1 in the morning so <33 lovely anon

🥰

oh my god the fact that you cried nearly made me cry too😭😭🥺🥺 (also, your brother LMAO), i wasn‘t even sure if you‘d see it but i immediately thought of you so of COURSE i included you <333

the hulu police lsjsjaiaik, girl i was ready to get a hulu membership when i wanted to watch big time adolescence and i couldn‘t find it anywhereee, and when i got to the payment it said i need a bank account that‘s based in the US or whatever. like bro i was about to pay you!! but i was forced to find it somewhere (and i did, on levidia,— not that i‘ve ever used it because it‘s illegal 😤 i would never!!! i‘d rather support billion dollar companies and spend my money on watching films that i can find for free 🥰🥰🥰 not

i‘ve found chaos walking online so i‘ll watch it som time this week!! also YES TELL ME THE STORY

okay so idk if you watched/are planning on watching falcon and winter soldier but i watched the first episode the other day and they were speaking french (just a few seconds) and I UNDERSTOOD SOME WORDS DLDJDJ and i was so proud of myself. i‘ve only ever learned french with duolingo lol (i only do like 5 mins a day and that‘s why i was so surprised that i understood some of it!!). and yeah apart from latin i feel like italian, german, french and english are all similar in a sense.. i mean obviously they‘re completely different languages but for example there are some grammatical constructions in french that i think i wouldn‘t understand if i only spoke english? so when i translate those things into english you can‘t directly translate them bc you say things differently, but when i translate them into german then it makes more sense to me. idk that‘s something i noticed so i feel like if you already know multiple languages it‘s easier to learn another language compared to if you only know one language and are trying to learn a second one. even if the languages aren‘t similar then i think you get the hang of it easier.

ikd slsjsjs also i don‘t want you to think that i‘m a linguistic genius or anything lmfao, like i‘m only fluent in english and german and i‘m just a wannabe (ew that word) polyglot sksj (yes i had to google polyglot— i do think learning ancient greek would be super cool tho? like imagine studying latin AND ancient greek, whew). and honestly i don‘t think i‘ll ever be fluent in another language bc i don‘t plan on living anywhere other than germany or possibly england and i‘m not dedicated enough to properly learn any other languages esp if i don‘t have anyone to speak the language with. but i still try my best and i just love language/languages as a whole so yeah i‘m happy & just learning as much as i can dkdjh🥰

(I guess language/linguistics are/is my passion (which sounds sooo lame lmaoooo) and the word passion comes from the latin word pati (i think💀) which means to suffer, and in german passion is called Leidenschaft which basically means suffering too, idk why i‘m telling you this maybe you know it already. but ok dumb fun fact, in german you can make compound words with as many words as you like, and the longest official german word is Rindfleischetikettierungsüberwachungsaufgabenübertragungsgesetz which is a law for the monitoring of labels on beef... this is such a dumb fact but i think about that word like once a day idk why dodjsjsj so... 👁👄👁)

but i‘ll stop boring you with my linguistics talk because truly i don‘t know much about languages but i am interested omg i‘m gonna shut up now.

now water + sharks. (so in non-covid times i always go to croatia with my dad during the summer, and even before ever watching a shark film i was always kind of scared in water.. but after watching so many shark films wldjdj HELP Like you know when you go deeper into the ocean and you can‘t see or feel the ground/floor? anymore.. then i just start imagining sharks. like i can‘t help it i just imagine a shark sneaking up on me or feeling something graze my foot ABD I JUST START FREAKING OUT SSKJSHSJ. idk. anyway kdkdh i do love the ocean/swimming though but the older i get the more i realise how fucking scary the ocean is ( even if we’re gonna disregard sharks)

your brother... what‘s wrong with him? HOw CAN YOU NOT LIKE MUSIC LIKE WHAT THE FAWK

OKAY BUT SAME ABOUT THE ADORE YOU MUSIC VIDEO DLDKDJSJSKSLSLKSKSJSHSH and yeah i have to say harry’s style (styles lol) as a solo artist isn‘t reaaally my cup of tea, and i only like the popular songs from his second album and the first album is only good when i‘m in the right mood (haven‘t actually listened to it in a while though, but kiwi is one of my all time favourites along with only angel but i hate the start, like it takes 40 seconds to actually begin properly). i like mgk and because of him i watched the dirt which is a film about motley crue, and now one of my favourite songs ever is same ol situation and i‘m into rock now lol. +++ justin bieber. I had a justin bieber cardboard cutout thingy😭 i was the biggest Belieber on earth when i was 13-16, but i didn‘t like his last album and tbh he‘s become a bit weird lately, BUT OH MY GOD. i Listened to his new album yesterday and i‘m in LOVE with the song hold on

i really like niall‘s music toooo!!!! And doja cat 😌😌😌😌 And THE VAMPS OG MY GOD. i got to see them live bc they were the opening/support act for little mix and ajdsjskslslsjsjsj. (Also i love concerts, some of the best memories of my life are concerts, i‘ve seen nicki minaj live 🥺🥺🥺🥺🥺🥺🥺 and justin twice and my heart fills every time i think about how excited i was, it was my first concert ever (16th of September 2016 😌) and i was the happiest person alive seeing justin drew fucking bieber (even if i‘m not tooo sure about justin nowadays)

i have a confession? Idk what hamilton is. I mean I‘ve heard about it and i keep googling it but i‘ve never watched it (is it even a film???? or like a proper musical? also pls tell me you grew up with high school musical. i have a few friends who didn‘t and it makes me so sad 😭😭😭 hsm is the best thing to happen to my childhood , the sooooongs— i still listen to some of them every week or month lool they make me so happy)

(Okay wait i was about to recommend some stormzy songs but you said you‘re not that into rap so i won‘t dksksjl)

What you said about my fic AHSLSLSJB (i wasn‘t sure if you sent an ask about it earlier? idk that might have been someone else, so if it was (and you‘ve read it already) i hope you liked it sksjsj i was...... unsure about it. and i have this reeaaallly long peter fic that i started writing in december and that‘s the only peter thing i currently want to write but also i can‘t because idk how to continue kddjj.) but I’m definitely getting back into writing i have a few blurbs that i want to write so 🥰🥰🥰

Oh and pls as soon as you read this let me know: violet or yellow? (it‘s just a tiny thing for my new theme slsksj)

[oh-shit-a-baby]

BLACK FRIDAY THOUGHTS PART TWO

A complete compilation of my thoughts throughout the musicals second half,,, this bois going to be real long bc I have a lot of thoughts lol

Now without @drawinglinesinarbitraryplaces :(

Yep dumbledore can still sing

Omg his voice

This song is going to make me cry aaaaa

Becky: you don’t look at all the same as I remember

Me: yeah no shit dumbledore grew a beard

Jesus,,,,, theyre just going to go for it right there,,,,,, ookay

Wtaf is this movie they’re watching

HOLY SHIT HER VOICE IS /PRETTY/ HER RANGE IS HUGE!!!

Idk if this is an unpopular opinion bc no one has an opinion yet but Becky and toms song is the cutest one ever and a bop and I love it

Jesus they payed for a balcony and they’re going to fucking use it aren’t they

WELCOME TO PEIP HQ IM SO DOWN FOR THAT

OH THERE ARE MANY DIMENSIONS????? U GONNA EXPLAIN THAT MR GENERAL MACNAMARA????

The black and white isn’t that what lexs sister was on about

Wiggly is the king u wot m8

President kurt knows nothing about anything and that’s a mood

So if the next movie isn’t about ‘13 years ago’ imma freak

U WANNA SEND ME INTO THE FUCKIN TWILIGHT ZONE AND HAVE DINNER WITH THE DEVIL??????!?!!

NO!!! FUCK THAT!!!!! FUCK THAT!!!!! FUCK THAT!!!!!

^^^president kurt quotes

In short, mr president, we are trying to stop the birth

*dramatic piano*

Of a god.

*dRAMATIC PIANO*

It’s good score tho 10/10

Sherman young

Nuff said

After today’s great battle???

Faith in the one true god!! All hail wiggly!!!

My new religion lol

LET LAKESIDE MALL BE A NEW JERUSALEM!!!!

*cue joey and Robert just screaming wiggly for like 5 mins straight*

NO THEY FOUND LEX

OH YEAH FUCKIN KILL THEM!!!

Who????????

FUCK YEAH LINDA

CULT??? NO! ITS A NEW EXCITING RELIGION THAT I STARTED!!!!

Yeah Gerald

She pronounces Cinnabon as see-nah-bohn what’s up with that lol

I NEED A WIGGLY DOLL...... IDEALLY FOUR OF THEM!!!

IVE MET GOD. HE HAD NOTHING NICE TO SAY ABOUT YOU.

*cue people dying and their mics stopping working*

Holy fuck they all wanna kill Hannah now (lexs sister gets a name now apparently)

LAUREN I LOVE YOU AS A VILLAIN

I would kneel before villain Lauren any day

I will deestroy everything, and then I will deestroy everything, and then I will deestroy everything and then I will oh shit it’s Gerald.

While I don’t want you to think for yourselves I do want you to understand what I mean when I say my evil shit

I’m sorry that choreo is a yike

ETHAN DARLING COME BACK I MISS YOU <<<333333

IM CRYING NOW

He’s in the black and white now we’ll that sounds like shit

NOT ETHAN

Hannah is the unsung hero of this musical so far

*said in wiggly voice* well, webby (Hannah’s spider imaginary friend who I think is gonna be the deus ex machina of this thing) is a stupid bitch!

Rotten little banana. I’m going to peel you. I’m going to split you in two. I’m going to eat you Hannah. I’m going to eat you right now. *all said in dramatic wiggly voice*

Aaand their mics broke again

We don’t get tricked! We’re grown ups!

And Becky and Tom are immediately evil the second they see the wiggly bc of course they are

Jesus beckys the villain???????

Welcome to the musical where everyone gets a villain song AND a hero song??????

Her voice is still beautiful

*Prancing around* DO YOU WANT SOME CANDYYYYY??????

She’s still wearing ethans hat my heart is going to go oh my god

And he just,,,,, leaves Becky to die?????

President Kurt in a space suit oh my god

And America is great again is playing in the background

MACNAMARA SAID ‘GODSPEED’ AND IS THAT A CATCHPHRASE I SENSE THERE

Yeah no president kurt can’t do foreign policy

His name is like howie or something but imma call him president kurt just like Tom was dumbledore for like the first half of this mess

Oh fuck joeys character is here and he’s gonna FUCK PREZ KURT UP

He’s eating an apple that means he’s a asshole

Holy fuck joeys character is like the ultimate capitalist

And also terrifying holy shit

NO MACNAMARA DONT GO IN THERE

Joeys character: Do you think that in the Netherlands they’d care about some toy??? Nah!!! They’re too busy with their free vacations and FREE healthcare!!

(When I refer to joeys character I mean the evil one he just doesn’t have a name yet so idk what to call him)

And joey can still sing I love him

His voice is so good and this whole villain is giving me spies are forever flashbacks

I have absolutely no fuckin clue what’s going on rn

Holy fuck joeys voice is so beautiful and his range is killing me

I take back what I said earlier this song is the best one bc joey

Holy fuck someone just hit like a high d and I have no clue who it was bc the video quality is not the greatest

JESUS THATS TERRIFYING

THE FUCK YOU MEAN DONT BE FRIGHTENED THATS MY SLEEP PARALYSIS DEMON

LOOK AT THIS FUCKER JESUS CHRIST

Wiggly is so scary because he speaks like a child and those are scary

MACNAMARA EX MACHINA

Mac: BEGONE

Prez kurt: SORRY JOHN I FUCKED IT UP

THATS THE HOOK FROM NOT YOUR SEED ISNT IT HOLY SHIT

Joeys voice and acting is gonna kill me

Yeah made in America is the shit

MAC NO U CANT DIE U DIE IN TGWDLM

Also the black and white is a dumb as shit name for an alternate reality

Prez kurt: MERRY CHRISTMAS MOTHERFUCKER!!!!

*wiggly voice* Uh-oh mr prezzy-wez. It seems you’ve misplaced your bomby-womb.

Well shits about to go down

I’m calling it the bomb bombed the White House

Oop no they’ve only gone and lost Moscow

Well fuck here comes ww3 I guess

And prez kurt is definitely insane in the brain

ITS THE HOOK AGAIN THE ‘ALIENS INVADING MINDS’ BIT OH MY GOD I FEEL LIKE A MUSICAL GENIUS

Jesus Sherman is a weird fuck and lex is kinda clever I guess it’s a shame we haven’t seen her for most of the musical

Lex: I THREW EM IN THE FUCKIN TRASH

LEX BABY NO DONT DIE

Lex: Is this what I live for? To be choked in a toy store?

Lexs beautiful song is this musicals version of not your seed but depression

And her voice is /pretty/

MAC?????????????

WHAT??????????????

OH MY GOD HE IS AUTHORISING HER TO USE HIS FIREARM YES QUEEN

I’m sorry lex and Hannah can do what

Jeffs voice kills me him and joey need a duet and that would be the end of me

What did lex just do in so confused

MAC DID THE SALUTE IMMA CRY YALL

And we’re back with Tom

Oh fuck lex is gonna shoot tom

Hold up Tom names his son Tim

Wiggly is playing mind tricks now yikes

Lex: KIDS DONT WANT THAT PEICE OF SHIT!!!

Tom: wat

Lex: THEYRE ALL INTO FORTNITE DUDE!!!!!

So the doll can only fuck with adults not kids???

Jesus Christ this is depressing

U wot lex

Lex: YOURE LIKE 40!!!!! YOU PROBABLY THINK YOURE LIFE IS OVER!!!!

Holy fuck this shit is deep

Wait lex still doesn’t know about Ethan oh my god

And Dylan gets another hero song holy fuck just give Robert a song already everyone else has one

At the same time though this is S a d

I’m not crying you’re crying

YES DUMBLEDORE U HIT THAT HIGH NOTE

Tom: in fact you’re real fuckin ugly

Me: yeah no shit

Lex: FUCK YEAH!!!! Should i move these boxes first?

*cue very clever scene change*

Yeah Gerald no one wants to talk to u

Oh my god Linda leave Hannah and ethans hat alone my heart is breaking for Hannah

Linda: is this some kind of a jooooke?????

They’re gonna set one of their dolls on fire ok ok ok this is fine

More villain songs ookay

If someone could tell me what the fuck is going on in this scene I’d be very impressed

Evil yoga

YES LAUREN U QUEEN

HOLY FUCK IS THAT CHARLOTTE??????

OH MY GOD ITS JAIME IN THE CHARLOTTE COSTUME IT IS CHARLOTTE HOLY SHIT

ITS CHARLOTTE AND THE HOMELESS DUDE HOLY SHIT

The choreo is...... interesting

Cue Robert not-Corey and Lauren being the only good dancers and getting special choreo

FUCK YEAH BECKY WITH THE GUN

LINDA NO

Ookay so everyone’s on fire this is fine

Emma and Paul ex machina

SOMEBODY NUKED MOSCOW!

paul is family third wheeling

YOU KNOW, SHE HAS THIS KOOKY RECLUSIVE BIOLOGY PROFESSOR

*audience fucking looses their shit*

WHO LIVES ON THE EDGE OF TOWN

Paul is having an existential crisi because he sHOULD HAVE WORN A WATCH

Someone’s gonna fall of that staircase by the end of this performance

HOLY FUCK ITS THE HOT CHOCOLATE KID

IT IS THE HOT CHOCOLATE KID OH NY GODDDDD

LOOK AT HIM

It’s the what if tomorrow comes bit!!!!!!!

Okay again this choreo is interesting but the vocals are all S t u n n i n g

They’re literally counting down until the end of the show imma loose my shit that’s the least subtle they’ve been during the entire show

Hang on hang on hang on hang on haaaaang on right there

Did lex just never find out that her boyfriend died we were deprived of a heart wrenching moment when she found out about Ethan

Like jeez I cried and I barely knew him she was dating the guy and just... didn’t ask about him????

ITS THE HOOK AGAIN

That’s it!!!!! Those were my thoughts the first time I watched this through!!!!!!!

Scream at me in the notes with any questions and I’ll try answer them :)

[fart-gate]

SG1

Season 2 episode 7

"MESSAGE IN A BOTTLE"

Notes by me

- A nice stroll on the moon!

- I was wrong its not the moon :\

- Daniel so matter of fact when he says things. The Confidence

- "you think it might be a booby trap?"

"..........booby?"

- Daniel said the name of the episode

- this old ass metal ball is gonna be a problem isnt it. The theme for this show is Ideas That Backfire so I feel like this is a mistake

- 2 more elements for the periodic table!

- "I think he has a crush on you"

"Uh we are recording now..."

"......oops"

Daniel your match making skills are abysmal pls stick to your day job

- the NID again?? Barf no thanks

- P4G881 is the next mission!

- daniel saying his archeologist skills are needed here with the ball and hammond saying Noted

- no glasses!Daniel

- "Jack come on....."

"DANIEL"

Scolding his little bro

- P5C353 is where the ball is from

- is it alive???

- guys you are holding a radiation infected ball with your bare hands do you WANT to die

- IMPALED 👀

- oh god right thru his shoulder

- the alarm is giving me anxiety

- the rest of them running into the room to help 😭 all my kids are in love

- "where the hell is tealc"

- they just have to watch him suffer while they try to get it out of him

- Daniel needs to stop blaming himself for everything

- quarentine! I know how you feel guys

- at least they gave him something to sit on

- the ball has little bugs in it. They look like bacteria

- OH GOOD GOD THEYRE ALL OVER JACK

- oh no not graham!!! Hes cute!!

- is tealc holding jacks hand 💕

- who cares about your quarentine !!! Graham needs help!! Hes got one foot in the grave!!! Typical that he would be allergic to the only medication that could help

- "it wont take us without a fight,sir."

"Damn right"

- junior protects tealc from the bugs

- tealc staying with him and dabbing his forehead with a cloth ❤ im fine

- "tealc, you dont have to stick around"

"Undomesticated equines could not remove me"

- tealcs first joke mark the calendar❤

- they called each other "my friend" I'm on the edge of my sanity here folks

- DAMN that was a good scream. He reached out for tealc god im having a good time

- Graham is not looking too hot! He wants to see Sam :) maybe a little in office dating will spice things up? Would love for Sam to date a co worker who she outranks

- if it cant live without oxygen then just give Jack a breather and suck all the air out of the room.

- maybe that wont work since the bugs are already in the walls and thru out the base.....dont listen to me I'm dumb

- oh we are switching it up today my dudes. 'When in doubt, blow it up' has turned into 'under no circumstances give this thing more energy' so bombs are off the table I guess :(

- Jack pls dont blame yourself. What is with you and Daniel putting everything on your own shoulders

- sam and fraiser height difference 💕💕

- Graham needs to not die pls. I would like to see more of him

- not me just realising how hairy daniels hands are

- ".....come here!"

"Who?"

"What? Anybody! just come here!"

Daniel needing someone else to confirm hes not seeing things lol

- it has intelligence! THEN LET JACK GO YA ELECTRONIC SHIT BAG

- ah ok!! We need to give it a good kick!

-it wants to talk thru Jack ! I would like to see it

- the music for this scene🔥🔥🔥

- sam holding jacks hand my brain is imploding

- he looks oddly water logged ?

- "Good morning, campers." I AM OFFICIALLY FREAKED OUT

- the bugs.....can talk

- RDAs acting 💕💞💕😭😭❤❤❤

- if only Daniel wasnt jared 19 then maybe we would have known all of this information from the writings on the ball

- "he wishes to live" THIS IS SUCH CHARACTER DEVELOPMENT FOR JACK BC OF HIS EARLIER ATTEMPTS TO KILL HIMSELF 😩😩😩💗💗💗

- P4G881 is a good idea. Let them infest an unpopulated planet

- I guess the bugs dont understand why someone would be nice to them lmao

- it worked! They let go!

- ok maybe not. Zombie!Jack

- best trope is the self destruct stopping at 1 second

- "we thought we lost you, colonel"

"wild horses, captain"

- lets never go to the planet that you sent them to ok? Okay

- ..........so is Graham still alive or no

~

Whump under the cut

Jack Oniell whump: metal spike through shoulder , pinned to wall, hanging off wall, crying, noises! , shocked by staff weapon mutliple times, infection, fever, screaming, blaming himself, worried tealc

No glasses!Daniel for less than 5 minutes 🤓

🎶listening to I Have Nothing by Whitney Housten 🎶 bc tealc is jacks bodyguard and if Jack died he would be heart broken 💔 bros for life

[mastcrplanncr-a]

issue #23 made me really heccin’ emo over eggman and sonic. i was prepared for it, but also ?? not prepared??? holy frick im just gonna ramble under the cut.

first of all, i’m just gonna’ idly ramble about some things i noticed.

Eggman, literally 11 issues ago:

he makes these off remarks and then changes his mind whenever it’s convenient for him smh. that or hes a freaking liar and. WELL THAT’S PRETTY TRUE HONESTLY.

i’ma be honest fam starline is a freaking mood rn. it’s ?? so dumb?? LIKE EGGMAN WHERE IS YOUR FUCKING FAILSAFE UR SOLUTION WAS “not touching the robots hurr durr” PL EASE.

In retrospect, though, this is an interesting parallel to Forces because he’d apparently learned from his mistakes. TBF, and it has been brought up elsewhere on tumblr, this is a man recovering from amnesia. He must’ve just not gotten to that part. OR HE’S JUST. DUMB AND ARROGANT. Like, yeah, sure, there’s no vaccine - lol the heroes can’t fix anything & it also means you’re valuable because you’re the one person who can. BUT COME ON EGGMAN.

my friend actually predicted this holy shit. i was rambling abt a discussion we had in the egg cult, where we were talking about the possibility of sonic infecting eggman to blackmail him into getting the cure because he’s reached the point?? hes so done with eggman’s shit??? all his friends are in danger and hes backed into a wall what else is he to do than do the one thing he doesn’t want to: use eggman’s tactics against him?

and my friend was like:

LIKE. IT IS A HUGE RISK, and Sonic went FOR IT. I’M SCREAMING TBH.

THIS CONFRONTATION WAS SO FUCKING RAW YOU DON’T UNDERSTAND. I thought I was ready for it but I really, REALLY wasn’t. I love the little details of Starline bein’ like: “oh fuck” - usually he’s pretty cocky around Sonic but uh. HE’S INFECTED NOW. And the zero remark - idk if that’s intentional on the writer’s part but ZERO TO HERO anyone?

anyway toxi broke down crying at this point. you have no idea how much i was sobbing over my blue son just. pouring out his heart to his nemesis. that’s top tier tearjerking material.  also starline passive aggressively readjusting his outfit lmfao. BITCH IM FABULOUS. but man the usage of ‘ BE’ and ‘LIKE’ - Sonic knows who Eggman is; he’d never ask him to be something he’s not. but it’s also a reiteration of sonic’s want to see good in him; being LIKE tinker is a statement in that he wanted eggman to be who he was, but NOT to go back. to do good for the world. have it be his own decision, because deep deep down:

isn’t that what he really wants?

Also, although there are those sickly sweet descriptions, the usage of ellipses in this narrative really fucks me up because you can practially hear the gradual realization in eggman’s voice. his mockery starts out so !!! but it just eventually gets straight to the point, as a list. as a routine. because he was used to it. and because, some part of him misses it. notice the usage of ‘need’ and ‘use’. they needed him, and yet he used the people that appreciated him sm like puppets.

some nice guilt there, huh, doc?

ALSO I SPENT LIKE, HOURS TRYING TO FIND THIS EXACT DIALOGUE, but Eggman has a conversation in Dark Brotherhood with Sonic and makes this remark:

LIKE??? this isn’t new to his character, actually? Ignoring the ken penders thing bc smh. Going by this game he’s actually kind of okay with that set up. And he just works so well with the others too??? this isn’t even taking into account the other games he’s teamed up with them. I’m sorry but my head just goes back to this line so many times; it’s one of the ones that stick with me, along with ‘complicated guy’ from lost world. HE COULD!! legitimately do good. and he actually doesn’t find it too bad??? IM EMO MAN...

and IMAGINE making super cool things that people genuinely like... eggman has a HUGE ego, that much is very apparent; he’s super big on appreciation as comes with. and with tinker? he had that - he felt appreciated and loved. people LIKED what he made, and he didn’t have to bend over backwards to have that. his work felt included and he didn’t have to take that appreciation by force like he did with his lackeys (which half the time was fake anyway) .

first and foremost - WE SEE THAT OPEN YOUR HEART REFERENCE, IDW. also sonic’s frustration here, in comparison to the lil smile the panel before - he’s just!! “WHY CANT YOU WAKE THE FRICK UP OLD MAN”. the justification here seems a tad bit like DENIAL to me. and the justification seems... kind of odd from him? since when does EGGMAN justify anything he does? He does what he wants and when he wants, because he’s the E.G.G.M.A.N. he doesn’t care what anyone thinks... right?

it’s because - especially with the usage of better - he didn’t like where that train of thought was going. for once, he’s justifying himself - because the alternative is admitting sonic is right. that he did like that life. that he’d want to go back. throw it in a hierachy and it’s all so simple, right?

also the inclusion of open your heart lyrics here. the incident with chaos was just as catastrophic. and these lyrics in context of the previous panel, highlights how sonic and eggman both seek unity and peace but in their own ways; eggman’s is just evil. it seems a little bit of a diversion to me - to antagonise sonic and make him forget about it. what better way to do that than to relate to him? ‘own styles that we won’t change’ highlights a stubbornness in ways, too, especially with the current context of eggman denying his old life. ALSO IT IS LITERALLY TELLING EGGMAN TO OPEN HIS HEART.

and ngl this seems like idle banter to hide the fact he genuinely felt remorse for his actions for a second. because lbr he has a habit of being all talk when a plan goes wrong or suffering inside,

which starline does quite pointedly explain.

As I was saying above, Sonic has no choice in what to do now - he’s reaching his limit. OR ELSE. hes pondering doing the thing he doesnt want to do. and honestly, ‘you can’t stop me. no one can,’ is so hardhitting not just because of its looming threat, but because of how much it solidifies for sonic that he can’t take the chance anymore. if anyone is going to change eggman, it has to be himself.

also can i just cry over how much sonic trusts tails. im getting sa2 flashbacks.

also man i’d like to point out the specific use of ‘lock you away forever’. it coooould be a reference to sonic’s time imprisoned during the events of sonic forces. bitterness?

NOT SAYING I CALLED IT, BUT I CALLED IT. it still hurts though. and wow, it really is horrifying when eggman fears his own heccin’ creation, huh?

i live for sonic being passive aggressive with eggman. give me more please.

im immensely concerned the direction starline is going, honestly. but it does say a lot about eggman; how he’ll keep trying the same things expecting different results, but failing and never seeing that. because he’s EGGMAN; every plan is brilliant by default!

i love how sonic just !!! SHOT... THE MOMENT HE WAS REMINDED WHAT WAS AT STAKE. son i love you so much you’re doing great sweetie

also, man, can we talk about eggman avoiding his blatant faults, and shoving his failures onto someone else? because this little scene here - eggman ur literally the one who crashed the thing. it had absolutely nothing to do with sonic. i feel as though this is symbolism of his self-destructive nature, honestly. hes always gotta make things harder for himself. (also starline’s face is killing me)

Eggman does what he has to, but technology won’t work every time you kick it. he thinks he can get everything through force but we have several instances in idw where force did NOT work out; you’re not gonna get far, egghead.

MHM, and just who does that sound like, Eggman? honestly the mirrors between these two are seriously destroying me. although sonic is in a horrible position, so is eggman; he likes to think he’s won the war, but hes surpassed his own expectations, and that’s going to backfire on him eventually. hes stubborn to admit he has NO REIGN over this and they’re all doomed, so he’s pinning his failures / loss on Sonic.

is that the amnesia kicking ya in the shin, eggman? or sonic’s reality check? either way, the doc hates emotions. dammit man why you gotta make him emo

future eggman is going to kick past eggman in the kneecaps. it’s times like this ur reminded how much of a kid he is. eugh but that’s work i want my victory and senseless destruction now. honestly if the doc is after success, he is certainly not getting it this way and I AM FEARING FOR EVERYONE’S LIVES. he’ll probably have to work with what’s left of the resistance like the back end of most games at some point.

I’m getting a little burnt out but i can’t forget my son and how much he hurts me.

first of all that third panel terrifies me. the fact it GOT that far does me great concern. the RED EYES? that’s pushing it fam i dont like that. the expressions are also just freaking destroying me; they’ve been PERFECT this issue. and the fact sonic is at his weakest when he feels like he’s failed everyone hurts me deeply. he has SO much on his shoulders and its getting too overwhelming for him.

also man... the whole thing with eggman... just stuff me man. but it hurts all the more because it’s so glaringly clear that there is?? some good in eggman??? he just. doesn’t want to admit it. and unfortunately these aren’t good circumstances to debate on that.

ANYWAY, THAT ISSUE WAS AGONY AND IM STILL REELING AND HAVENT EVEN. TALKED ALL THAT MUCH ABOUT SONIC HERE (on account of this being eggman’s blog) but idk if i’ll write anything on that.

gonna go cry about an egg now brb