#so i apologize for forcing you to interact with this pos even MORE

[greedbent]

@howthesleeplesswander || surprise starter for human!Spring! 〔´∇｀〕

“Didn't I tell you to be more careful?”

And if Kaz had startled the poor girl by his coming up behind her with no word of warning or semblance of a greeting before delivering harsh judgment . . . Good. He slid in easily at her side, matched her pace in a heartbeat, and kept on walking with the nonchalance of this being entirely planned between the two of them. The hour was late, but the streets remained—as ever—loud and bustling with the night life of the Barrel: distant clattering of coin in the gambling houses, cacophonous whooping and hollering of tourists hoping for a lucky break after hours of emptying their pockets (too inebriated now to care about their losses), an entire collection of drunkards wandering the dimly lit paths (with a few simply tucked away in corners quite possibly whimpering into their knees over their life choices).

Simply put: Not a place where this particular woman should be. Looking like she did. Young. Fair. Pretty. Wide-eyed. Innocent. Gullible. So out of place Kaz almost wondered if she had put effort into it, as if she'd found a manual on all the ways to appear the easiest target and followed it to the letter.

She might as well just be wearing a sign.

Even if Spring had flinched and briefly stumbled over herself, Kaz continued with nothing more than a pointed look back at her: Keep up. Don't draw more attention. As his own gaze kept a vigilant watch over their surroundings, he pinpointed any set of eyes turned their way. Her way, specifically. And the less than respectful whistling from a small group of the aforementioned drunkards (the ones who were high off the intoxication rather than low and miserable) as they watched Spring pass was what brought Kaz closer to her side.

“You shouldn't come here alone,” he reiterated, choosing at that moment not to announce that he'd already . . . persuaded a few pickpockets off her tail mere minutes ago. “Especially at this hour.” Kaz pursed his lips, made a quick move to steer Spring down a quieter street. “What the hell are you doing? No one has a dying need for flowers so urgent you'd have to make a delivery in the middle of the night. Or have you just had a spiritual calling to a new profession?”

“Spiritual” was not the right description for the “profession” implied here.

[kitfyy]

Hello fellow British Boys enjoyers

time to introduce myself (before I forget it)

I got no idea how to start this so uh-

call me Mr. rat, kit or kitfyy ofc :) (or anything else really, some others called me mango too)

I use he /him and they/them pronouns :)

I’m a minor (not comfortable telling my age, sorry), amateur artist and a local lotf enjoyer. even tho I just got into lotf a few weeks or days ago I am already obsessed /pos!!

I use tone tags because it is easier for me to understand stuff like that (I’m a bit stupid) so feel free to do the same for me!

also I sometimes act a bit weird, like I forget stuff very easily and can only really focus on stuff I like, I sometimes just run around and get really upset when my plans get ruined or some stuff that sound weird or feels weird, it just hurts my body smh🧍‍♂️

wanted to say that because I might just start ranting abt stuff I like or stuff that just happened to me lol

message me whenever you want, I just may won’t see it because sometimes I forget to check my notifications or I am at school/work so I don’t always see messages.

I can be clingy and I apologize for that. I just feel so happy whenever someone is okay with me so that’s something (understandable if you guys don’t want to interact with me)

OH OH also I use emojicons (I think they are called that) like :3 :] :D etc because I love them.

I’m a satanist but I don’t mind anyone’s religion as long as you don’t force it onto me <3

ALSO I AM IN MULTIPLE FANDOMS and I like a lot of stuff

some stuff I like

lotf obviously /lh

rats!!

helluva boss!! (hazbin hotel too but helluva boss is my top)

ghost!! (the band)

sharks & ducks (they r so cute)

genshin impact (not so active there no more)

FNaF & Omori

pokémon

planes, trains and especially buses (for some reason)

I also like collecting rocks. sometimes I just go to a specific rock beach and collect the rocks 🪨

anyways I don’t know what to say anymore :] so yeah, feel free to message me if you want to. I don’t mind ranting to me or venting or just yapping

stay safe everyone, I love you all <3

(also might add more stuff later on)

[polypromptsmybeloved]

An unlikely ot7 who nobody thought would even end up as friends let alone become a polycule.

A is a grump who finds most people annoying

B is an extremely lucky gifted kid who doesn't really have much friends

C is a loud rebel who drives people away with their behavior

D is someone who seems to care only about themselves and their selfish demeanour drives people away

E is a chaotic gremlin who can and will murder you. tries to make friends but people just find them annoying

F is pretty much a mysterious loner who doesn't really interact with people. And is also a sign language user

G is someone who has a really bad home life and doesn't get out much. Never had any friends and is the last to join the group

They all hated each other when they first met but then became friends and grew feelings

( basically a huge enemies to lovers polycule lmao )

When they first realized they had feeling one another it was very awkward, having fought all the time and literally being opposites attract kind of thing, they found a way to make it work. They still fight sometimes. Person A can be grumpy a lot, but their partners always find ways to calm them down. They still keep the though "I don't give a shit about you" attitude, but they have a soft spot for their partners. Sometimes a few of them (like two to three) hangout or go on dates alone. Many people question if they are cheating, but no one really knows that they are all dating. Person B can often be found studying, occasionally their partners will join them or try to drag them away to hang out with them. As much as they pretend to hate it, they enjoy the attention. Whenever the OT7 go out on a date, everyone around them just assumes that they are just a group of friends. (Just besties hanging am I right) Person C is often causing trouble/getting in trouble. Their other partners have to bail them out of the situations they got themself into. Sometimes, C will steal stuff for their partners (which they [partners] will sometimes go back and pay for. The 7 of them occasionally fight (often times they will be split into two groups) but in the end they all apologies and just cuddle watching a movie. Person D spends a loooooonnnggggg time getting ready for dates or anything at all. Their partners don't like it, but damn. They look good. D tries not to spend that much time on their looks but they can't help it. They feel really lucky that their partners still stick with them despite them being really selfish occasionally. When the OT7 came out to their other friends they all thought they were joking. After a while they [the friends] realized they weren't and accepted them none the less. Person E has probably killed someone once. Their partners are like 70% sure that they are joking. No matter what, they all would defend them in court. (Making sure they stay on their good side /j). When the OT7 go anywhere they have to use a big van, they all take turns driving to where every they are going and on what song is playing. It's chaotic but it's nice. Person F is a sign language user, when they all first met no one in the group could understand them so they were forced to just write down whatever they had/wanted to say. But secretly they all took lessons to communicate with F. When they finally told F (in sign language) they started sobbing (/pos). A polycule as big as theirs means that they have more people to play DND with!! Often times than not, they all end up flirting with each other in character (and occasionally out of character) When the other found out about Person G's home life they all took turns sheltering them. And when the time could they bought a house together. G is now doing much better, and their partners are helping them with whatever trama they might have.

[something-tofightfor]

It’s Dangerous To Fall In love V: Certain With Desire

Pairing: Nick Caldwel (Fire Meet Gasoline) x Female Reader

Word Count: 11,123

Rating: N S F W 

Chapter warnings: S M U T. The after effects of being in jail for an extended period of time. 

Blanket warnings for this whole story: Crime, death, blood, injury, violence, abandonment, anger, sadness, mentions of jail/prison time, terminal illness, adultery, mentions of domestic violence and emotional abuse

Summary: Where did Nick go - and what happens when he comes back? Are you able to keep your distance even after admitting so many things to each other - and after he goes a step further in his attempt to apologize for what he’s put you through? 

Author’s note:

I legitimately didn’t even realize that this fifth part was done and ready, so I apologize for the delay... but it’s here now. 

I appreciate all of the comments and interaction on this story so far; it’s been a challenge to write, but I’ve enjoyed it.

Comments and feedback and questions are always appreciated. If you need to catch up before reading chapter 5, you can do that by clicking below. 

It’s Dangerous to Fall In Love Masterlist

As you stared at the closed door, you couldn’t help wondering just how many times Nick was going to walk away from you - and how many times you were going to let him. 

Loving him was one of the most complicated things you’d ever done, but it was also right up there with the most worthwhile. That’s why I can’t let go. Not completely. You wondered if it sounded as pathetic to him as it had to you when you’d told him what you really wanted - the man to kiss you, take you to bed and touch you, to tell you that he still loved you, even if it was a lie. 

Baring those thoughts and emotions to him hadn’t been the plan, but the more you talked, the more time you spent with him, you began to realize that it was possible that Amarillo - and the unofficial ‘end’ of the previous chapter of his life - would be the only time that you could actually say any of it. Before he moves on. Before we go back to whatever normal means for us now. 

You’d danced  around real feelings and emotions in the communication that you had while he was locked up, but doing that was difficult when you were face to face. It was impossible when he was touching you - the casual brush of his fingers or the press of his palm sending a jolt of heat through your body each and every time. 

And now that you knew that he wanted the same things - that he thought the bed was a temptation, too, and that he wasn’t capable of just having sex with you, you didn’t know what to say. You wouldn’t continue to beg; that was beneath you. His explanation for turning you down was solid, and you had no desire to derail whatever progress he’d made when it came to his mental and emotional states while in jail by forcing him to compromise on what he thought was best for himself. But that doesn’t make it easier, and it never will. Standing, you walked back over to your bed and began gathering your things, deciding that while he was gone, the best course of action was a shower. Then I don’t have to get up early and take one tomorrow. He can take his time.

The water was hot, cascading down your chest and over your shoulders as you stood beneath it, and even though you’d intended on using the time to get whatever emotion out that you could, you didn’t cry. You were proud of yourself for admitting the truth to Nick, even if it hurt. He’d told you that he loved you in the first letter, but you hadn’t ever said it back until the situation had forced it - and you hadn’t gone any further until that day, admitting that even though you knew it was stupid, you couldn’t just turn off the way you felt about him. 

You loved Nick Caldwel, and you always would, no matter the outcome of your situation. Forgiving him would take time, but based on the way that the two of you had talked since his release - navigating through difficult conversations and finding ways to explain yourselves without resorting to arguments - you thought it was possible, even if it only mattered to you. But it matters to him, too. Slicking your hair back under the spray of the shower, you took a deep breath. He wouldn’t be trying so hard if it didn’t. 

And Nick was trying. You could see it on his face in every expression he wore, feel it in the way he was holding himself back when you were next to each other. You heard it in the catch of his voice, the wavering of it as he tried to come up with the right thing to say in response to the rapidly changing emotions between you. I have to give him that. I have to … cut him some slack. Not for leaving - not yet - but for the way he was behaving in the present. 

As you began to towel off, you heard the door close and then footsteps on the floor followed by the sound of your name. “I’m in here, Nick. Be right out.” Him coming back wasn’t a shock - he’d said that he would, and he hadn’t taken anything with him. He seemed calm, too. The door hadn’t slammed and he wasn’t stomping around. The man’s voice was even, although slightly cautious when he told you that he was back and to take your time. 

Getting dressed in your pajamas - more shorts and a t-shirt that had seen better days - you checked your phone before heading back into the bedroom, and even though it wasn’t quite midnight, it felt much later. “Bathroom’s yours, Nick. I -” Stopping in your tracks, you cocked your head to one side, eyes on your bed. “What’s… what is that?”

“My options were kind of limited.” He was sitting on the second bed, hands clasped together between his spread knees. “So I …” He stood, pressing his lips together. “I picked from -”

“You got me flowers?” Setting down the dirty clothes and your phone, you leaned over the bed and picked up the cellophane wrapped bundle that was resting on your pillow. “Nick, you -” We had a disagreement and he left to go and buy me… “Thank you.” Lifting them to your nose, you closed your eyes as you inhaled, the scent stronger than you’d thought it would be. “You were the last person … well the last man to buy me flowers.” Glancing up, you met his eyes. “You know my parents get me a bunch every year for my birthday, but aside from that, you were the only one that ever did.” 

He stepped closer, his hands in his pockets. “I don’t know if I have any right to ask you this, especially after what I said right before I left a little while ago, but …” He took a breath, tongue darting out. “I’m not ready to be in any sort of relationship, and I don’t know if you’d want that with me, even though …” Even though I just told you I loved you.  “But I’m gonna be in Mesa for a while, if not … for good again, and I’d like to keep in touch.”

“In touch?” Frowning, you set the flowers back down on your bed and then rounded the foot of it, head moving back and forth in confusion. “You make it sound like as soon as we get back, we aren’t going to … do you think that I’d come here and bring you back and then just … stop speaking to you?”

“I don’t know.” He shrugged. “I don’t want to get my hopes up. I don’t know what people are going to say, or what you’re gonna feel when it’s not just the two of us, and …” His eyes moved to the wrapped blooms, lingering there before thy met yours again. “I walked out of your life once and I don’t want to do it again, even if it means we only talk over text or on the phone.” Removing one hand, he pointed at the bed. “A sad bunch of flowers from a gas station is a really shitty start to an apology, but it’s still me trying to -”

“Nick, I just begged you to have sex with me, I’m pretty sure that -” He stopped you with a lifted finger, the corners of his lips briefly twisting up and into a smile. 

“There was no begging. You just told me what you wanted. There’s a difference.” There is, I guess. But … “Whatever happens to me in the future, I think … no, I know that I need to fix this as much as I can before I can move on.” Move on? Your eyes widened and he swore under his breath, reaching out with one hand and grabbing your wrist.  “I don’t mean move on from you. I mean move on from … punishing myself for everything.” Oh. Ok, that … “But you’re in my corner right now, so -”

“I never left it.” Inching closer, you wrinkled your nose, Nick’s grip loosening so that he could hold onto your hand. “Well, I mean, I might have vacated it for a couple months while you were gone, but …” He laughed at that and so you did, too, breathing a sigh of relief. “If I gave a shit what people were saying I wouldn’t be here right now. I wouldn’t have come to Texas to speak on your behalf. I wouldn’t have driven to you in the middle of the night.” Reaching out with the hand that he wasn’t holding, you rested your palm against his cheek. “Thank you for the flowers. Yes we can keep in touch.” His fingers flexed, the man’s focus on you as you took a deep breath. “I shouldn’t have dumped all of that on you at once, but you asked what I wanted, and -”

“Do you know what I want?” He paused, shifting his shoulders. I have no idea. “I want to go back to that day when you asked me to make you understand what the fuck I was talking about. I want to go back to you telling me that we could put off the wedding for a while if I needed to, and say yes.” He moved closer, his free hand moving from his side to your hip, the man cautiously touching you. “I want to look down at your left hand and see two rings there and then look at mine and see a third.” Fuck, Nick. “I want to take everything I’ve learned in the last two and a half years and go back to before any of it happened and keep it from -” Moving the hand on his face, you pressed two fingers against his lips, head moving from side to side. 

“You can’t do that.” But. “You know what you can do, though?” He didn’t reply, so you continued. “You can use it now. All of it. Losing your dad and deciding to leave and going to Texas and meeting Elena and everything that happened after … because you’ve got your life back now, Nick.” And you’ve got me. “And I want to be in it, in whatever way you’ll let me.” Because I love you. 

He didn’t speak, the man’s eyes locked on yours, but he did pucker his lips briefly, pressing a kiss to your fingers as his other hand tightened on your hip. You pulled your hand free from his and then dropped your other one, encircling him with both arms as you drew him into a hug. He let you - both hands flattening against your back, your mingled breaths and the sound of the air conditioner the only noises in the room. 

Being held by him was just as comforting as it had been earlier - it felt right, and you didn’t want to separate. But I should, otherwise I’ll stand here all night. He said your name, both hands sliding from your back to your waist, pushing you gently away. Yeah? “Being sorry wasn’t the only thing I was talking about when I said I meant it all.” He looked nervous, eyes darting around before he closed them, nodding. When they reopened, you saw Nick there, in a way that you’d been convinced you never would again. “I love you. I never stopped. I don’t think I ever will, and I know that everything I did might make you think otherwise, but …” 

You sucked in a breath, unwilling to believe what he was saying. Because it can’t be true. It can’t … he’s … “Nick…” He swallowed, waiting. “Why didn’t you just … say this before? Over the phone, or -”

“Because I needed to tell you in person. There wasn’t another option. I wanted to look you in the eye when I said it, because I knew it would probably be the last time.” You were still holding each other and you wondered if he could hear the beating of your heart, wondered if he could feel the slight tremble of your fingers as they curled against his back. “It might not mean anything right now, but I need you to know that it’s the truth. I’ve made a lot of mistakes. Closing myself off after my dad died. Leaving and not looking back. Elena. Ryan. But calling you that night wasn’t a mistake. And it wasn’t just because I knew your number, or because I -” This is everything that I… that I’ve wanted to hear him say for years.

“I love you too, Nick.” Sliding one hand up the center of his back, you cut him off. “And it’s not just a part of me that does. But you already knew that.” He smiled briefly. “Might not be easy, but between the two of us, I… I think we can -” 

“I’m going to kiss you right now.” He cut you off, the words leaving his mouth in a rush. “If you don’t want me to, then… stop me.” You had no intention of doing that. Nick closed the distance between you slowly, his hands still at your waist, yours pressed to his back - and only when his lips touched yours did you close your eyes, your entire body trembling at the feeling. 

— 

You didn’t pull away from him. 

He told you what his plan was, and you didn’t pull away. Instead, you leaned closer, your entire body shaking as he kissed you - for real - for the first time in more than two and a half years. He didn’t want to push his luck - had no intention of it, but when you sighed against his lips, Nick couldn’t help himself. 

He pulled you closer, your body flush against his, and then looped his arms around you, hands on your back. You were solid to the touch, more real to him than he’d ever hoped you’d be again, and even though you’d hugged multiple times in the previous hours and he’d gone to sleep next to you the previous night, the kiss was different. 

His cheeks were damp when he finally broke the kiss to take a breath, and at first Nick thought you were crying again, but at the slight widening of your eyes and the lifting of one hand, your fingers brushing over tops of his cheeks, Nick realized that he was responsible for the tears, and that they were still tracking down his face. “No reason to cry, Nick.” You smoothed your thumb over his skin, the look in your eyes one of understanding. “I’m right here.” 

He’d cried in the privacy of his room many nights after leaving Arizona, finally letting the emotions wash over him once the gravity of what he’d done had settled in, and after so long, Nick had assumed that he didn’t have more tears to shed. But I was fucking wrong. Just like I was wrong about so many things. “I’m so sorry Calabaza.” Running his hands up and down your back, he shook his head. “So goddamn sorry.”

“Is kissing me really that bad?” Your lips twitched, and he realized that you were trying to lighten the mood. “It made you cry, and you have to apologize? I think -” 

“No.” He leaned in again, pressing his forehead against yours. “No, it’s not bad. Not at all.” His hands moved from your back and to your face, palms dwarfing your jaw as he tilted your head to look into your eyes. Your hand remained on his face, too, thumb stroking over the bare patch on his cheek. “I want to do it again.” He saw the expression on your face change, a fleeting moment of worry passing through your eyes before it was replaced with one of determination and acceptance. 

“I want you to.” He realized then what it was - you weren’t sure that wanting him was the appropriate emotion to feel. I don’t blame her. “Nick, I want you t-” You were still nodding when your lips met for the second time, Nick’s fingers trailing down and over your throat from your jaw, yours sliding back to settle behind his ear like you’d done so many times before. 

If that night was the only night he ever got to kiss you again - if you woke up the following day and decided that it had been a moment of weakness to let him near you physically, that after what he’d done, you couldn’t bring yourself to let him touch you intimately again, Nick would understand. And I’m gonna tell her that.  I’m going to - But before he could pull away from you and speak, he felt you parting your lips, the tip of your tongue gently prodding at the seam of his. What? This… He reacted, though, drawing in a breath through his nose and opening his mouth to you, both hands settled on your shoulders. 

The first tentative stroke of your tongue along his was all Nick needed, his hold on you tightening and a deep sigh straight from the back of his throat audible as he adjusted the tilt of his head to match yours. It was everything he’d wanted for months, despite reminding and trying to convince himself that he didn’t deserve to have you again. 

It took him no time at all to lose himself in your kiss, his mind focused only on how close you were and how your hand tightened in his hair and the way you pressed your body against his, hips rubbing together. He felt his body’s reaction - blood rushing down and settling between his legs along with growing arousal coursing through his veins. If we don’t stop, I’m not gonna be able to hide the fact that I…

You were fresh out of a shower - hair damp, your skin clean and soft, and with another gasp, Nick pushed you away, his chest heaving. “Stop for a second, alright?” He swallowed hard, focused on your face. “We need to talk about something before we get carried away.” You were wary but still nodded, and even though he knew that he needed to, he couldn’t bring himself to stop touching you - or put more than a few inches of space between the two of you. “I didn’t buy condoms when I got your flowers earlier.” He paused. “And that was deliberate.” Nick said your name, trying to ignore the brief flash of disappointment he caught on your face before you forced it neutral. “When… if you and I get to that point again, it’s not going to be here. It’s not going to be in a random, out of state hotel that we’re in because you’re picking me up from jail. And I know what you’re about to say, because I know you; I don’t care if you’re still on the pill or you’ve got an implant or any of that shit. Anything else would be irresponsible as fuck, and -”

“Ok.” You nodded. “I understand.” There was a pause, and you opened your mouth again. “Did you and -” Closing it as quickly as you’d begun to speak, Nick knew what you’d been about to ask him. Did you and Elena use protection? 

The answer was a resounding yes - each and every time - but he knew that he couldn’t tell you that for the same reason you couldn’t bring yourself to ask the full question. He knew that you had with whoever you’d slept with while he was gone; it wasn’t fathomable that you would have done anything else with a short term relationship. But he understood why you would question what had been the case with the other woman. And she shouldn’t fucking have to. “Whatever happens with us, I wanna do right by you this time.” He licked his lips, narrowing his eyes. “And that means that as much as I’d like to drag you into that bed right now, I know it’s better if we don’t.” 

“I am on the pill, Nick.” You raised an eyebrow. “But you’re right. We’ve waited long enough, it shouldn’t… we shouldn’t … not here.” You looked away, eyes landing on the flowers that you’d set down. “I’m going to put those into some water so they make it through the night.” He didn’t say anything as you made your way through the room and grabbed the ice bucket, carrying it over to the sink and filling it halfway. Nick sat down on the end of his bed, watching you and trying to get his heart rate under control. Smart. 

You then walked back to the flowers, picking them up and lifting them to your nose, closing your eyes briefly as you inhaled. You didn’t stop yourself from smiling, and you didn’t keep your eyes off of him as you did it, either - peeking up from over the tops of the bouquet. “You think they’ll last for the whole ride back?” He cleared his throat. “Maybe we can stick the ends into a bottle of water or something, put it in the backseat cupholder?”

“That’s a good idea.” You shrugged, making your way back to your bed and taking a seat on the side closest to him. “I was just thinking about stealing the bucket, but…” That made him laugh and you joined him after a few seconds, reaching up to swipe at the back of your neck. “Nick I need to be honest with you.” About? “It’s taking every single bit of self control I have to not climb onto your lap right now and -” 

“Shit.” He exhaled, closing his eyes. “I shouldn’t have … I should have just…” You protested but Nick spun to face you, head whipping back and forth. “Fuck, I didn’t even -” 

“Why are you constantly apologizing?” You leaned forward, eyes on his face. “I get that you’re sorry, Nick. Of course you are. But you don’t need to apologize for turning me on. You don’t need to apologize for kissing me like that. You don’t need to apologize to me because I can’t keep my body from reacting to finally being touched by you again. What did you think was going to happen?”

“Would have been easier for you if you didn’t react, wouldn’t it?” He shifted, rubbing the top of his knee with one hand. “Or if you hadn’t reacted the way you are. Then you’d know that after all this time, you could finally move on.” 

“If I was going to move on I would have done it already.” You spoke so quietly that he almost didn’t hear you, but when you said his name, it was almost a plea. “We’ve both been calling this closure, but that… I don’t think that’s what this is.” I don’t either. “I love you, Nick. And I’m not sure what that means in the long term, but … it definitely doesn’t mean that I’m not going to react when you touch me or kiss me.” You arched a brow, dropping your eyes briefly. “And if this morning’s any indication, you’re just as into it as -”

“That’s not fair.” He tried to hide his grin, pressing his lips together. “The first fucking morning I’m out, I’m in bed with you, and you expect me not to react?”

“True.” You fidgeted on the bed for a few seconds. “What about just now, when we were kissing?  Did you -” Is she really asking this? 

“Yeah.” He didn’t look away. “If we would have kept going for much longer, I probably would have had to go into the bathroom and take care of it.” You ducked your head at that, Nick unable to hide his smile at the look on your face. “That’s another reason I stopped you. If I’m gonna tell you we can’t sleep together, it makes it a little awkward if I’m doing that with my di-” You interrupted him, lifting your chin to meet his gaze again. 

“We don’t have to have sex for me to “take care of that” for you.” You used your fingers to make air quotes, voice steady. “If… you want.” 

— 

You understood what he was saying and why - the man clearly outlining why he couldn’t and wouldn’t sleep with you, the denial of pleasure that he was forcing on himself when it came to being close to and kissing you. But he doesn’t need to. Not if we both want… The room was silent after your offer, Nick’s brown eyes darker than usual as he stared at you, his full lower lip caught between his teeth in surprise. “Don’t tell me that you wouldn’t like to feel someone else’s -” 

“Why?” He leaned in. “Why should I be the one that gets …” He dug the tips of his fingers into his eyes, swearing as he rubbed them. What? What does he mean? When Nick met your gaze again, there was determination in his eyes. “You gonna let me return the favor?” Tilting his head to one side, he crossed his arms over his chest. “Or is this going to be one of those nights like when you used to get me off and not let me touch you?” You laughed then - you couldn’t help it. 

“You’re the one that keeps stopping us.” Gesturing to yourself, you uncrossed your legs before setting your hands down atop your knees. “Like I said, there’s plenty of ways to -” He stood abruptly, the man’s hands hanging by his sides. “Nick?”

“You’ll tell me the second you want me to stop, right?” He stepped closer and you watched as he curled his fingers into loose fists and then flexed them. “No matter what it is that I’m doing?” 

“Of course.” Your voice little more than a whisper, you looked up at him. “And you’ll do the same?” He nodded, both hands moving back to the front of his body, and you watched as he pressed his thumb down against the tattoo, Nick’s chest rising and falling. “Oh, Nick.” Rising to your feet, you reached for him, taking both of his hands into yours and moving your thumbs over the backs of them, pulling him closer to you. “Talk to me. What’s wrong? If this is going to be an issue for you, we can just -” 

“Would you believe me if I said I was nervous?” He closed his eyes. “Not about what I’m gonna do, but about … you.” Me? Why? “It should have been you all along.” it should have been but it wasn’t. He looked down, watching your joined hands. “And I’m worried that you’re not gonna tell me if you don’t want - ” Don’t do this to yourself. 

“When have I ever been quiet about what I like or don’t like, Nick?” You squeezed his hand and then let go of one, that hand trailing up his chest. “Why would that change now?” When you reached the collar of his shirt, you hooked a finger into it, tugging down. “I’ll answer that for you - it won’t.” The reassurance seemed to help, Nick’s free hand moving to your hip, fingers sliding beneath the hem of your t-shirt before they made contact with your skin. 

You nearly whimpered at the feeling but held it together and held eye contact, nodding. “Alright.” He took a deep breath, squeezing your hand again before he let go, his hand moving along your jaw and urging you closer, the man’s eyelids finally drooping shut as he pressed his mouth to yours. You’d never get sick of kissing him, and certainly wouldn’t ever get over the way it felt to be held by him. How could anyone? 

While you knew that both of you had a lot to work through, you didn’t have to do it that night, and neither did he. We need to focus on this. So you did - holding him close and continuing to kiss him, mouths moving together in a surprisingly familiar way as he slipped his other hand against your opposite hip, rubbing his palms over your sides. When you pulled back, inhaling to fill your burning lungs with oxygen, he only hesitated for a second, hands bunching the fabric of your top between his fingers. “Yeah?” You nodded in agreement and when he began to lift your shirt, you helped by raising your arms over your head, letting him take it completely off of your body. 

You’d thrown on a sports bra after your shower but it covered very little. You didn’t even try to hide your sigh of approval as Nick stared at your body, hands returning to your skin and palming it, the man leaning in and then ducking his head down to kiss your shoulder. “Wait a minute.” You tapped him on the shoulder, the man’s eyes moving up to your face. “You’re a little overdressed. Jeans and a shirt?” Head shaking slowly from side to side, you raised a brow. “Pick one and take it off.” 

Not only did you want to give him the choice, you wanted to see what he’d go for first, and were unsurprised when he reached for the bottom of his shirt, arms crossed over his stomach as he removed it and tossed it to the side, along with yours. Like always, his jeans hung low on his hips, the elastic of his underwear visible above the waistband of them. Jail had slimmed him down somewhat, his arms muscled while his torso was leaner than you’d ever seen it. He had tan lines on his upper arms and neck, but the difference was slight and someone that hadn’t spent so much time looking at his bared skin likely wouldn’t have even noticed. But I do. “You’re staring.” You could hear the teasing tone in his voice and were relieved at the sound, nodding as you held up both hands in mock surrender. 

“You caught me. I guess I didn’t know what to expect, but … fuck, Nick. You’re…” Reaching out, you used one hand to undo the button on his jeans. “Take these off, too. So I can -”

“You first.” He met your eyes again, your name falling off his tongue like a plea. “Let me take care of you first, alright? I know you keep telling me I don’t need to apologize, but -” He stopped, closing his eyes. “Look, it’s gonna take me about three seconds if you touch me with your bare hand, and probably less if you were to use your mouth. I just -”

You laughed - out loud, the sound bursting from your lips and you immediately pulled your hand back as you grinned. “That’s really fair, Nick. I didn’t even think about that. I’m sorry.” It was good that he was being honest - and that he was keeping the mood light, but you knew that eventually you’d both have to take that leap, one of you initiating actual contact with the other. And it has to be him. It has to be me that shows him it’s alright. “I won’t touch you until you tell me to.” Both hands going to your hips, you pushed your shorts down an inch or two and then paused. “But Nick, if you don’t touch me, I think I’m going to -”

He moved forward, hands shooting out to replace yours and when you tumbled backwards onto the bed, bouncing against the mattress, Nick was quick to follow, though he didn’t reach for your chest. Instead, he hooked his fingers in the elastic band of your shorts and tugged them down. Wasting no time, he pulled them off of your legs and dropped them to the ground before he stepped between your knees, leaning down and flattening his hands on either side of your body. “Every single inch.” What? Propped up on your elbows, you stared at him, waiting. “I’m gonna show every single inch of you how much I missed you.” 

“Oh, I -” Taking a deep breath, you arched your back, leaning forward enough to kiss him again. “I like the sound of that.” You felt him smiling against your lips before he moved away from them, his mouth trailing over your cheeks and nose, pressing kisses into the corners of your eyes and then over your forehead. You wanted to touch him, but also didn’t want him to stop so you kept your hands in place, closing your eyes and letting yourself enjoy what was happening. He took his time, and when you felt one of his hands lift from the bed, reaching up to rub his thumb over your lower lip, you sighed, puckering your lips to kiss his skin. He won’t stop me from doing that. 

Nick moved slowly down, lips dragging over the line of your jaw and then, after he’d repositioned his hand behind your head to tilt it back, he kissed the underside of it, his mustache tickling the thin skin. You felt the mattress dip as he raised one knee, the man giving himself a way to balance his weight. Both of his hands moved to your shoulders, fingers stroking your skin while he continued his path down the center of your throat with his lips and tongue. 

He paused again at the base of it, stopping for long enough to press his lips against the dip, followed by his teeth scraping over the surface of your skin, the man moving to the left and following the line of your collarbone. The hands on your arms turned into his knuckles, the sensation vastly different than that of his mouth, and you didn’t know where to focus. 

He helped you decide by biting down on your shoulder and then glancing up, his eyes meeting yours briefly before he went back to what he was doing, Nick’s mouth tracing a slow path down the inside of your arm until he reached your wrist. He lifted your hand then, mouth covering the final inches it took to reach your palm, but instead of lingering there, he used one of his hands to flip yours over, his parted lips landing against your knuckles. No, not knuckles. One specific knuckle. 

He was kissing your ring finger - your left ring finger, and at the realization, you crooked your fingers beneath his chin, choking out his name and asking him to look at you. “Come here. Please.” He was confused for a second, but when you sat up, arms unnecessary to keep you upright, he understood. “I need to kiss you.” Need. Not want, Nick. 

“But I’m -” He blinked, wetting his lips without letting go of your hand. “I -”

“I don’t care. You can go back to it if you want, but… just come here.” He did as you asked, threading his fingers between yours as he sought your mouth once more. It was you that deepened that kiss, the edges of your teeth capturing his lower lip and then pulling on it, the man’s mouth opening as he chased after yours. 

You let him catch you - like you always had. And like I always will. That time, Nick’s kiss was almost desperate, his head cocked to one side as he pressed his lips against yours. You could feel it rolling off of him, and so you moved both hands, too, disentangling your fingers and winding your arms around his shoulders. Testing your luck, you leaned back, dragging him down with you until your back was flat against the mattress, Nick’s bare chest pressed to yours. 

He didn’t let you stay that way for long, inching back and using both of his hands on the mattress to put space between you. “You aren’t playing fair.”

“Do you blame me?” Biting your lip, you shrugged. “Seize the day and all that, right?” He smiled, cheeks rounding out and the dimple appearing on one side of his face. “You can go back to what you were doing now, I’m done kissing you for the moment.” That made him laugh, but it didn’t take long for him to lower his mouth once more after shifting backwards, his kiss landing just above ethe neckline of your bra. “Want me to take that off?” Preparing to raise the top part of your body, you said his name. “It won’t take -”

“I got it.” He smiled, one side of his mouth quirking upward before his lips settled into a more serious expression. “Relax.” You did, eyes on him as he reached for the bottom edge of your bra and pushed it upward, exposing your chest to him after only a few seconds. His eyes went wide, moving so that he could take in the sight of your bared skin - and then, for the first time in longer than you cared to think about - Nick’s breath fanned out over your chest … and was almost immediately followed by his open mouth. 

You cried out as his tongue flicked against the side of one breast, the man wasting no time in licking his way to the peak of it, lips closing around your nipple and then sucking, the pressure making your back bow. Oh, fuck, he… You relaxed again as he took a breath, both hands still on your body as he pushed both breasts together and then descended again, mouth moving eagerly between the two, damp skin left in the wake of his tongue. 

The air conditioning ensured that your nipples remained hard - but even if it had been eighty degrees in the room, his mouth would have done the same thing, the pressure of his lips and teeth sending surges of pleasure throughout your entire body. You could feel that he was itching to continue his journey down the remainder of your torso, though reluctant to remove his mouth from your curves. 

Nick ran his nose along the center of your chest - up and down - and then kissed your skin once more before his lips dropped to your stomach, hands releasing you before they slowly made their way down your ribs. He peppered your stomach with kisses, and you had to bite your lip hard to keep from writhing on the bed as his facial hair tickled your freshly-kissed skin, but Nick’s focus never wavered, the man dipping his tongue against your belly button and then going lower. 

You hadn’t realized it, but he was standing again, bent at the waist as he worked his way even further down, and when you watched him sink to his knees at the edge of the bed, it was your turn for your mouth to drop open. You focused on the man’s face, watching as Nick’s shoulders rose and fell with each breath he took, eyes locked on your body as he leaned back in. When his mouth made contact with the top of your thigh, you gasped, fingers curling to grasp the blanket. How is he able to tease me like this? He has to be so fucking worked up. 

He didn’t linger there, though, kissing his way inward - but Nick skipped over the center of your body and straight to the other leg, his palms on the outsides of your thighs, fingers slipping beneath the backs of them as he pulled your legs further apart. He only glanced up once, the questioning look in his eyes easy to read even though he didn’t speak. Do you want this? He would have gotten up if you’d told him to, would have immediately removed his hands if you’d asked - but you didn’t. 

“Yeah, Nick. I want you.” 

— 

Your permission was all he needed, Nick breaking eye contact and tilting his head down, his focus entirely on what was in front of him. Part of him had wanted to fast track it down your body to bury his tongue inside of you, but he’d forced the slow path instead, giving himself time to calm down and you time to tell him to stop if you wanted to. 

But your response to his mouth and hands had been more than he’d ever hoped for, your body pliant to the touch, breathing changing as he worked his way over your skin. He saw the way your fingers curled, heard the reaction to his lips against your finger, and when you’d pled with him to kiss you, he hadn’t been able to deny you. 

You were letting him back in - at least on a physical level - and Nick was thankful. But he was more thankful that you were an active participant; offering to take your bra off, wanting him to remove his clothes, too, letting him spread your legs as he settled between them. You weren’t just laying there - you wanted him and were making it known. 

He could smell you; sweet and musky, still one of the most alluring things he’d ever encountered. Nick had promised himself that he’d focus, not thinking about what had happened, but for a split second, he wondered why he was getting a second chance with you. Does it matter? He kissed the inside of your thigh, the tip of his nose running along the crease of your leg. No, it doesn’t. Not right now. With another slight turn of his head, Nick’s lips made contact with you - and then he stopped worrying, stopped thinking about everything but you and the way you tasted. 

He used his tongue at first, parting his lips and then extending it as he licked you, his grip on your legs tightening enough that he felt your muscles tense beneath his fingers, but it wasn’t in pain. He heard you cry out, the sound a mix of his name and a strangled moan, and then he felt your hands in his hair, fingers tangling in the strands. You weren’t pushing or guiding him, just holding on, reassuring him that you were there and didn’t want him to stop - and as he retracted his tongue briefly, he smiled against your damp skin, nudging against it with his nose. Good. This is … good. 

You tasted just like he remembered, and as Nick’s tongue began to move again, he lapped at you - focus shifting to covering as much skin with the flat of his tongue as he could with each swipe. You widened the spread of your legs even as you lifted one of them to drape it over his shoulder, the heel of your foot pressed against the center of his back. He kept his hand on that thigh, but pulled the other one away and brought it up between your legs, thumb pulling your skin taut to open you up just a little more. 

He heard you moaning his name again, and though he didn’t stop, Nick glanced up, finding that you’d collapsed back onto the bed, one of your hands leaving his hair and falling to your stomach, fingers splayed. When he dipped his tongue into you, your lower body jerked and Nick hummed, changing the angle of his head at the same time he swiped one thumb over you in light, tight circles, just above where his mouth was. “Fuck, Nick.” Your voice was thin and broken, hips pushing forward, and when Nick pulled away so that he could take a deep - and necessary - breath, he raised his head to look at you again, the motion of his thumb not ceasing. 

You were staring at him with your lips parted and your eyes halfway closed, but when you saw that he was watching, you smiled - a radiant one, your tongue swiping over your lower lip as your bare chest rose and fell. He knew that his mouth and chin were shiny and slick but he still raised his head further, pushing his lips out into an expression that was half pout, half smirk and then winked at you, tightening his fingers around your thigh. 

You gasped and then laid all the way back down, Nick returning his mouth to your body. Sealing his lips over you, he stopped the movement of his thumb and instead slipped a finger into you, your body reacting immediately to the intrusion. He paused - briefly - but when you began to thrust your hips forward, taking his finger even deeper, Nick started to move it, his tongue flicking rapidly against you. I missed this. Missed this so fucking much. 

You started to whine, a hand going back into his hair, and for the next few minutes, the two of you moved in tandem - Nick adding a second finger and lengthening the strokes of his tongue, his other hand still on your leg while you dug your heel into his back, hips jerking as you sought out more. But when he heard you say his name again, the sound low and full of need, he opened his eyes, looking up. 

You’d propped yourself up on one elbow so you could watch, your gaze nearly burning him as your eyes met. “Keep looking at me, Nick. Keep…” His tongue joined his fingers and you squeezed your eyes shut, moaning. That sound. That fucking sound is… He was painfully hard - the material of his jeans uncomfortable even through the underwear he wore, but he was still focused on you and on the way you were reacting to him. “Fuck, Nick, please. I want to -” You hissed, nodding your head as you urged your own legs open even more. He thrust his fingers in deeper, curling them upward as he alternated between licking and sucking on your skin, the suction of his lips accompanied by the occasional gentle scrape of his teeth. You liked that - hips surging forward to drag yourself against his mouth, and Nick fought to keep his eyes open and on you. “Make me come, Nick. Ma-”

Your words stopped as he sped up the motion of his fingers, and you went from simply touching the back of his head to grasping his hair, your fingers tight among the sweat-damp strands. You were close - he hadn’t been with you in a long time, but he’d never forget the tells you had - the way your breath quickened, the quiet “oh” you managed to squeak out, the way your thumb moved independently from your other fingers - tapping rapidly against his scalp… they were all the same, and Nick felt his own heart begin racing at the thought that you were about to tip over the edge - and it was because of him. 

You gasped out his name again, tightening your grip on his hair and then letting go - and then he felt your muscles fluttering around his fingers, your legs tensing as your back arched and your eyes finally closing as your mouth dropped open. That’s fucking… He groaned into you as you came, refusing to remove his mouth, though he changed the way he used it, no longer needing to work you up and instead focusing on prolonging your pleasure. 

When your hips began to shake, he switched from his tongue to his lips, pressing kisses against you as he finally withdrew his fingers, the length of them coated in a pearly white that made his mouth water. Somehow, you moved your leg from his shoulder and pulled your hand away from his hair. When he was free, he rose to his full height - still on his knees - and said your name, taking a long, deep breath. You cracked your eyes open and when he knew you were watching, Nick smiled at you, licking his fingers clean before sticking the tips of them into his mouth and then pulling them free with a pop. 

“Come here, Nick.” You beckoned to him with one hand, still propped up on the other elbow. “Come here and let me -” Turning his head, Nick used the bottom edge of the comforter to wipe the lower half of his face. That done, he crawled up the bed and used one knee to prop himself up above you, the hand that had been on your leg turning your head so that he could kiss the side of your neck. Before, you’d had no issues with him kissing you immediately after he’d used his mouth on you, but he didn’t know if that had changed, and didn’t want to ruin the moment with a denial of his affection. “Hey.” You pushed him away gently, saying his name again. “What’re you doing?” 

“Didn’t know if -” You turned your head back, lips skating over his cheek and then landing on the corner of his mouth, a smile spreading over them. 

“Nothing’s changed.” Your words were a whisper, the hand once again finding his hair. “Kiss me, you idiot.” And he did - hard and deep, the man’s mouth open against yours as your tongues met, nothing held back between you. He let himself rut against you a few times, the contact of his hips against your body making him moan loudly, and he wanted nothing more than to keep going. But I can’t. He allowed himself to kiss you for a few more seconds and then pulled back, eyes closed. I won’t. He was straddling one of your thighs as he knelt on the bed, hands falling to the tops of his knees, and when you looked up at him, there was curiosity in your eyes, along with sadness. “Nick?” 

“You ready to go to bed?” He forced the words out, settling back and resting his weight on his calves. “I’m gonna go and -” You sat all the way up, both hands pulling your bra back into place, the look in your eyes almost hard. 

“What the fuck are you talking about?” Reaching out, you took his face between your hands. “I know we’re not going to -” 

“Tonight’s not about me, Calabaza, it’s about you.” He kissed one palm, shrugging. “I’ll just go into the bathroom and -”

“No, you won’t.” You raised the leg that was between his, your thigh pressing against the seam of his jeans, and he forced himself not to react. “I’m right here, Nick. I want -” 

“I don’t deserve to have you anywhere near m-” You surprised him then, leaning forward and kissing him to stop his speech. He let you, the kiss lasting for long seconds, and when you pulled away, your eyes were shining. 

“That doesn’t matter tonight, alright?” You pushed his hair back and over his ear, swallowing hard. “After everything that we’ve been through, we deserve something good.” You paused. “You deserve something good. And if I’m saying that, then it has to be true.” Stunned, all he could do was stare at you, trying to figure out how to reply. I don’t know that I agree, but … “Let me take care of you, Nick. Please?”

A stronger man would have told you no. A better man would have firmly repeated that he could take care of things by himself, the same way he’d been doing it the entire time he was in jail. A decent man would have reminded you of what he’d done to you, and how he’d ruined everything. 

But instead of doing any of those things, Nick nodded twice, moving to the side and kneeling next to you before he lowered himself onto his back on the mattress, one arm wrapped around your body to take you with him.

— 

You’d known something was up when he hesitated with removing his jeans earlier, but you’d let it slide. And even in your post-orgasmic haze, you’d felt that he was holding himself back when he kissed you after getting back into the bed. But for the man to outright deny you the opportunity to get him off was a shock, and there was no way you were going to let it happen. No way. 

As he pulled you down on top of him, the look in Nick’s eyes changed again - apprehension still there but joined with a look of contentment. Good, that’s how it should be. Any other night, you would have taken your time with him and teased the man, the same way that he’d done with you, but Nick had waited long enough. He’ll enjoy it just as much, you rationalized as you kissed him once more, the palms of your hands flat on the mattress to support your weight. “Don’t think about it, Nick.” Murmuring the words into his ear, you pulled back so that you could look into his eyes. “Just relax.” He nodded once and you shifted off of him, hands moving so that you could undo his jeans - first the button and then the zipper, Nick’s hips lifting from the bed and allowing you to pull them down. When they were below his knees, he kicked them off, freeing both legs, and then settled back against the bed, waiting. 

You ran a hand down his chest and over his stomach, the heel of your hand making contact with his bulge, which was still encased in dark gray material. He groaned at the touch, continuing to make noise as your heel turned into your fingers, two of them stroking down and over him before running back up. His hips jerked, even though you weren’t touching skin, Nick’s hands gripping the blankets beneath him so hard you thought they might tear. “Can I… Can I touch y-” 

“Yes.” You squeezed him through his underwear as you replied, eyes flicking back up from  where your hand was and locking with his. “Fuck yes, Nick.” He only used one hand to do so, his fingers releasing the blanket and sliding across it until they could link with yours, both hands resting next to his hip. You slipped your fingers into the slit of his underwear, undoing the tiny button, and when you touched him for the first time, he hissed, back arching and his hips rising so that he could thrust himself into your hand. Yes. Just like that. Just like … Humming in approval, you wrapped your fingers around him and then pulled him free, not letting go as what you held came into view. 

You couldn’t take your eyes off of him - the man warm and firm in your hand - and after giving him a few slow, tentative strokes, you swiped your thumb over his tip, gathering the moisture there and spreading it. He was wrong. It’s been more than three seconds. Dragging your hand up and down again, you took a breath and then leaned over, continuing the motion of your hand as you kissed his abdomen. Following the trail of thin, wiry hair down from below his navel, you paused at the base of him, giving Nick a chance to tell you to stop. But when he didn’t - the man’s hips thrusting upward again, you turned your head and licked your lips, the tip of your tongue meeting his skin briefly, too. He yelped your name, his other hand finally moving to touch you, and at the pressure of it against the back of your head, you reacted, opening your mouth and running your lips against him - below where your hand was still working.

He groaned, the sound muffled from between his lips, which were pressed together. When you pulled your hand free from his, dragging the edges of your nails along the side of his thigh and then up and over the top,  Nick brought that newly freed hand up and bit down on the meat of it, further muffling his reactions. Oh, he… he had to when he was … You stopped immediately, keeping your fingers wrapped around him, and lifted your head. “Nick.” He opened his eyes, meeting yours, the look in them almost desperate. “Let me hear you.” Flipping your hand over and using your knuckles against his leg, you nodded. “It’s OK, Nick. You don’t have to be quiet anymore.” 

His eyes widened but he nodded, dropping his hand from his mouth and keeping his lips parted, the man’s breath coming out in quick pants. “Please, you…” He groaned as you stroked him again, wrist twisting a little when you reached the base. “Oh, fuck, that feels good.” You’d never heard him sound so needy, and when you lowered your head again, tongue extended, you heard him say your name, the end of it sharply cut off as you licked his skin, the plush feel of him against your tongue snapping you back to when you’d been together, your own eyes squeezing shut as you let out a low whine. “Calabaza, I -” 

That was all you could stand, dragging your tongue over his slit and then closing your lips around his head, taking him into your mouth with a low hum of pleasure. His reaction let you know that he could feel the vibration of your throat, Nick’s entire body shivering as he fell all the way back and laid against the mattress. 

Your hand and mouth moved together, fingers covering what you couldn’t take between your lips, and even though you tried to lose yourself in what you were doing, you couldn’t let go completely. Instead, you kept an ear out for changes in his breathing, tried to focus on the movement of his body and the tensing of his muscles in an attempt to ensure that you knew at least a few seconds before he was going to come. And he wasn’t quiet, the man’s breathing punctuated by gasps and grunts, quiet repetitions of “oh, fuck” and “shit” reaching your ears and putting a smile on your face, even though none of it changed your rhythm. 

He surprised you, though, his hips jerking upward and forcing more of himself into your mouth, your grip loosening as he hit the back of your throat. You gagged, pulling off of him with a surprised cough. Ow. He hadn’t done it on purpose, but Nick called out your name, both hands pushing against the bed as he struggled to sit up. “I didn’t mean t-” He looked worried, and you were quick to wave him off, hand still wrapped around him, your skin and his slick from your mouth.

“It happens.” You looked down and then back into his eyes, continuing to take steady, deep breaths. “You ok, Nick?” The apology still on the tip of his tongue, he nodded twice, lip curling when you dragged your thumb over his tip again. “Good.” Adjusting the position of your knees, you leaned forward, pressing your lips against the inside of one thigh. Before you got the chance to take him back into your mouth, Nick said your name quietly, one of his hands moving to cover the one you still had wrapped around him. “Hmm?”

He didn’t say anything, just tightened his hand over yours and nodded, urging you to move again with a single flex of his wrist. I can do that. The two of you worked together - the pressure of Nick’s hand guiding yours, the rest of him sliding against your tongue with every dip of your head. With him helping you, you knew it wouldn’t take him long to tip over the edge - and that was confirmed barely a minute later when Nick squeezed your hand, a long, low grunt following. 

“Gotta stop. Gotta stop unless you -” He hissed when you didn’t halt your movement, giving him a tiny shake of your head and twisting your wrist as much as you possibly could under his grip. “Shit. Shit, Cala… shit.” He was panting as you increased the speed of your mouth - continuing to work him over, tongue flat against the underside of him and flicking against every bit of skin it could reach. 

You wanted him to come - wanted him to fill your mouth, wanted to hear him say your name the same breathless way that had echoed in your mind in the months that you’d been apart. Only a few seconds later, you got your wish, his muscles tensing and then jerking beneath your touch, hips stuttering at the same time his grip on your hand tightened further. You squeezed his thigh, moaning as you got a taste of him. When you pulled back enough so that you could actually swallow, you felt him shudder again, the man saying your name with reverence as his hips continued to move. 

His hand fell away from yours and you confirmed with a quick glance upward that it moved to rest against his stomach. The man’s bent fingers twitched as you continued to suck, your lips sealed around him. Releasing him with a quiet pop, you took a breath, opening your eyes before you returned your mouth to his skin, tongue darting out to finish cleaning him up. But Nick didn’t let you, both of his hands rising and moving to your shoulders, fingers curling as he urged you back up toward the top of his body. 

You let him pull you, adjusting the position of your legs so that you didn’t accidentally hit him with either of your knees. When you finally got eyes on his face, you could see that he was smiling - the man’s expression totally relaxed for the first time in as long as you could remember. “Hey, you.” He spoke first, clearing his throat. “Get up here.” You did, stretching out on your side but leaning over so that you could nudge his nose with yours, eyes closing again before you pressed your lips to his mouth. Nick’s hands began to roam over your back, but both of you kept quiet, catching your breaths and steadying yourselves. 

Pulling away, you settled your head against the pillow and then bent one knee, lifting it and laying it over his leg. Nick’s hand dropped to your waist, urging you closer so that your entire front was pressed to his side, and for long moments, both of you just laid there, neither of you wanting to break the silence. But one of us has to. When the rise and fall of his chest was even, you cleared your throat quietly, the palm of your hand resting against his chest. “One of us has to get up and turn the light off.” You mumbled the words, eyes drooping shut. “Plug my phone in so the alarm goes off, too.” 

But still, you didn’t move, the steady beat of his heart beneath your palm lulling you to the edge of sleep. This is how it should be all the time. You had the thought before you could stop it, head turning enough so that you could kiss the front of his shoulder, but then Nick moved, the action forcing your eyes open and a sleepy “what?’ from your mouth. 

“Hey, it’s fine. Just stay here, alright?” He spoke quietly, rolling away from you before you could question it, and you racked one eye open, watching to see what he was doing. You followed his movement as he got out of bed, reaching down for his underwear and then heading into the bathroom. You knew that you’d have to get up, too, but you were exhausted, your body still recovering from what the two of you had just done. It hasn’t felt like this for me in … 

You dozed off, waking only when the mattress dipped, Nick leaning over to press a kiss to your cheek, the faint scent of mint reaching your nose. “Hmm?” 

“Do you want to get dressed, or -” He paused, fingertips moving slowly over your temple. “Or sleep like this? I’ll cover you up, and -”

“Wanna sleep with you.” You opened both eyes, head turned so that you could look up at him. “Like this.” He looked uncertain but didn’t tell you no, and when you reluctantly forced yourself into a sitting position, you sighed. “Let me go and…” You yawned, eyes squeezing shut as you covered your mouth with the back of one hand. “Will you be in this bed when I get back out here?” 

There was a long pause, but then he answered, voice hesitant. “Yes.”  When you opened your eyes and saw the look in his, you reached forward, thumb arcing over the line of his jaw slowly. Good. 

“Be right back.” Following his lead and picking up your shorts, you slipped them on before you stood, walking into the bathroom and speeding through your nighttime routine before flipping the main light switch off and heading back to the bed. He’d plugged your phone in, the tiny clock icon at the top letting you know that the alarm was set, but Nick was still sitting upright in the bed, bare-chested, though he had the blankets pooled on his lap. “What’s wrong?” 

“I missed you so much.” He looked up, a pained expression on his face. “And this just … made me remember how much.” Yeah, me too. You climbed in next to him, using both hands to turn his face toward yours. 

“That makes two of us.” Leaning in, you pressed your lips against his, letting them stay there for longer than you’d initially planned to. “We should sleep. Got a long drive tomorrow.” He didn’t argue, and when you both laid down, it was Nick that moved to wrap his arms around you first. He pulled your back against his chest and rested his chin on your shoulder, curling his body around yours under the blanket - the mirror image of the way things had been just before he’d left home years earlier. 

You were almost asleep when he spoke, breathing the words into your ear at the same time his arm tightened around your waist. “Love you.” It woke you up fully, the man freezing behind you, followed by the almost immediate loosening of his arm, a sure sign that he was about to tear himself away from you. No. No, you do not get to do this to yourself. You didn’t even think about it, turning your head toward him and clearing your throat.

“I love you too, Nick.” You sighed, scooting back enough so that you were pressed against him again, heart pounding as you nodded. “It’s ok.” He relaxed without replying, and as you felt his breaths even out again, you finally closed your eyes, too. It has to be.

What had happened that night probably hadn’t been the best idea, but both of you had needed it desperately, even if it was for very different reasons. Nick’s breaths lengthened, and when you were certain that he was sleeping, you allowed yourself to drift again, too. The last thought you had that night was about how difficult a position the two of you were in - and how much the earlier admissions by both of you had likely complicated things.

— 

 tag list coming separately ! 

[thejakeformerlyknownasprince]

Have you noticed the thing in fanfics of children's lit where the writer gives the protagonist new parent figures? The parent figures say things like "no child should have had to do x!". PF's don't prevent protagonist from doing heroism but might ground them for it after. Under their care, the protagonist is likely to get a job, often at the business of the PF. Seems less common for the Animorph (more in ATLA and Harry Potter), but if you have seen this, what's going on? Why do writers do this?

Why do writers do this?

Welcome to the fandom renaissance, Nonny!  My best stab as to what’s going on here is that we’re seeing fewer and fewer shipping wars due to a whole range of forces from “the average age of fandom is increasing” to “there’s an ongoing post-monogamy societal shift.”   BUT that there’s still a desire to see relationship-building fic go in the gaps where (for instance) Pro-Jacob Anti-Edward fic used to go.  So instead of writing about Edward and Bella’s romance, people are writing about Edward and Carlisle’s mentorship, or Leah and Rosalie’s friendship.

What’s going on?

Again, a stab in the dark: it’s a really fun story premise, one that can get away from the way ships are sometimes fraught with baggage.  Found Family is intensely cathartic, in the sense that it takes characters who are miserable and/or lonely in canon and allows them to build loving relationships with each other.  It also (IMHO) reflects that trend among Millennial Whippersnappers to move away from nuclear definitions of “family” and toward embracing everything from polyamory to sexless romance to adult adoption.

Not only that, but it’s awesome in that it lets writers play so much with foils.  Stranger Things obviously does this Up to Eleven (pun intended): Steve’s an arrogant jerk when he’s interacting with Nancy but a dorky sweetheart around Dustin, Hopper’s at his worst around Joyce but at his best around El, Billy’s evil to Max but might be redeemable around his mom, etcetera.  This premise gives fan writers the chance to get wildly different characters into a room together — what if the Tonks family adopted Neville Longbottom? — and start playing out the fun potential.

Why Avatar and Harry Potter (but not Animorphs)?

In a word: FOILS.  Both AtLA and Harry Potter are series filled with good, bad, and ugly mentors, and both series have contrasts between the good and the bad.  For AtLA, it’s no accident that Zuko finally reuniting with his father in S3E1 is intercut with the scene of Katara finally reuniting with her father.  Katara’s fam airs their grievances, talks things out, yells, cries, apologizes, forgives, hugs, and affirms their ongoing love.  Zuko’s fam deals with having 500 times as much baggage by... Zuko kowtowing silently on the floor while Ozai talks about everything but their problems with each other.  After that sequence, the desire to get Zuko into a room with Hakoda for some proper fathering is practically overwhelming, and many brilliant fan writers have obliged us by doing exactly that.

For Harry Potter, there’s no scene that’s as in-your-face with the contrast between healthy vs. unhealthy disagreement with one’s father, but there are still plenty of mentor foils.  Sirius and Petunia are probably the clearest examples.  Sirius is a raging mess who (on the surface) has nothing to offer Harry: he’s an ex-con with a drinking problem and untreated mental health issues who spends much of the series homeless.  Petunia has her shit together and (on the surface) is the perfect guardian for Harry: she’s a wealthy full-time parent who lives in a large suburban house, and is both his closest surviving relative and his legal guardian.  But of course all Harry needs from a parent is love and support, and Sirius offers that in spades while Petunia has none to spare.  Again, the desire to rip Harry away from the Dursleys and ship him off to go be a Black is overwhelming, and many beautiful works of fan fiction have done exactly that.

Animorphs... doesn’t have mentor characters.  Like, none.  Elfangor dies, Toby does her own thing, Erek can’t be trusted, neither Ax nor Jake wants to mentor, and all adults are possible controllers.  Eva’s the closest we get, but by the time she’s free, everyone (especially Eva) recognizes that the Animorphs are already more experienced than her.  We don’t even see a dynamic like the Teen Titans show where the villains mentor the heroes — Jake and Marco might occasionally parallel Visser Three and Visser One, but they don’t learn from the vissers the way that Robin does from Slade or Raven does from Trigon.  The kids just... find their own way.  So while people have written fic where Elfangor or Eva or Mertil or Tom mentors the team, there’s not this in-your-face missed opportunity for the kids to get the parenting they deserve in Animorphs the way there is with Harry Potter and Avatar.

Have you noticed the thing?

Personally, I love this trend.  I’m not much of a shipper — I’m not fond of “will they or won’t they” romantic premises, and actively dislike “they will because they’re soulmates” premises.  My favorite Ship Dynamics are all platonic.  Like, my faves include (but are not limited to):

Grubby Semi-Feral Mentee and Aloof Socially-Incompetent Mentor Bond with Alarming Speed Over Niche Magical Interest (see: Briar and Rosethorn in Circle of Magic, Boy 412 and Marcia in Septimus Heap, Jason and Bruce in Batman, Wart and Merlin in The Once and Future King)

Well-Intentioned Loving Parent Irretrievably Fucks Up Child, Copes with Fallout (see: John and Dean in Supernatural, Adam and Cal in East of Eden, Soichiro and Light in Death Note, Elaine and T.J. in Political Animals)

I’ve Only Known This Person With Extremely Specific Shared Trauma for 10 Minutes But If Anything Happened to Them I Would Kill Everyone (see: Toph and Zuko in AtLA, Luke and Annabeth in Demigod Diaries, Ax and Tobias in Animorphs, Spike and Angel in Angel, Parker and Eliot in Leverage, Johanna and Finnick in Catching Fire)

Saving the World Sucks But At Least My Ultra-Competent Siblings Are Suffering With Me (see: Edmund and Lucy in Chronicles of Narnia, Sam and Dean in Supernatural, the Hargreeveses in Umbrella Academy, the Crains in Haunting of Hill House)

Just Because I Tried to Kill You That One Time Doesn’t Mean I Won’t Help You Hide a Body, JFC We’re Still Family and I Don’t Know What You Take Me For (see: the Robins in Batman, Septimus and Simon in Septimus Heap, Kyle and Ian in The Host)

We Were the Weird Cousins At All the Family Reunions and We’ve Only Gotten Weirder Since (see: Kate and George in Story Time, Jake and Rachel in Animorphs, Po and Bitterblue in Graceling Realm)

[cinnamoonsworld]

Two Worlds Collide - Chapter 6 [Aizawa x fem!reader]

Hello everyone! Sorry if the chapter came out late this week, but my boyfriend had to study for some important exams and I didn't bother him during the week!  Enjoy the chapter <3 

-----------------------------------------------------------  Previous chapters: ch1 | ch2 | ch3 | ch4 | ch 5 You can also find me on Ao3! Warnings: mention of depression  Word count: 1,453 ------------------------------------------------------------ "Shouta can we know what you did to her?" Asked Present Mic to his friend while gulping down the last drops of beer he had. "Absolutely Nothing." Stated Aizawa feeling Nemuri's eyes on him. "Something must have been happened." She said in a serious tone. "She can not just change his behaviour like this." The three friends/colleagues were out for a quiet Friday night in a club to drink, as sometimes happened to him. Aizawa didn’t have to go on patrol that night, and once in a while he liked having his noisy friends around. Although he hoped you would be there that night, but you had declined the invitation hastily without giving any explanation the afternoon before when Hizashi asked you if you would join a Friday night of drinking with him, Nemuri and Aizawa .All three of them were clear that something had happened to you, but none of them knew anything. For two weeks now, you had become very coy and reserved with the teachers. Usually you would spend your lunch breaks or other moments of freedom during the day chatting happily with Midnight and Present Mic, but by now you had become nowhere to be found. Aizawa also tried to talk to you in some way, but every time you had a chance to be alone, you ran away without saying anything. He didn’t even understand when you were in your room, from which nothing but silence came. No one saw you running from all sides anymore. You acted as usual with the students, supporting them and listening to their doubts and problems." Did I told you about two weeks ago, when I met her out of the dorms with her quirk out of control?" Asked Aizawa while drinking a glass of Whiskey. "Sure." Said Nemuri with her cocktail. "And that she talked about more people, so that day something else must have happened after what you told her in class... you at least talked to her?" "I was not able to. " Replied the raven. "After that day I never had the opportunity to talk to her for real..." "And you should be a supervisor!" Shouted Hizashi while asking to the waiter for another beer. "She is your subordinate, if you want to talk to her, you can -Order her to.-" Actually, Aizawa didn’t want to force you. He still had in mind the angry look you gave him that afternoon, it’s as if it was burned into his mind. He also hated being forced to talk to someone when he didn’t want to, so he preferred to leave you alone and give you all the time you wanted to come and talk to him. Even though he knew you didn’t have a good relationship, he hoped that anyway, as the person you worked with every day, you would open up to him for what was happening to you. Instead, you created a wall you didn’t want to break down, and not just with him. The thing he felt the most about was not apologizing for his behavior. For once, he could let it pass, but his rigid nature had prevailed even before listening to your motivations. Nemuri changed the subject by starting to talk about his favorite thing: the last rumors about their colleagues, and Hizashi was immediately very interested in the thing. Aizawa, on the other hand, pretended to listen when he thought what you were doing at that time.

It was dark in your room, and the only light in the whole room was from the TV next to your bed. You were watching a play, trying to distract yourself. But even that night, like a couple of nights, you’d find yourself curled up in bed with a knot in your stomach. You still felt bad about what happened, even though you felt something more now: terror. Your manager has always been a very vengeful person, and you knew that very well, because you had felt what he was capable of. All you had to do was do something that didn’t suit him, and his revenge turned into extra training hours or interminable signatures, getting you home exhausted both mentally and physically. You didn’t understand why he behaved like that, but only too late did you realize that he wanted you to be a puppet at his command. You were his money-making machine, and you had to do everything he said without having to complain or anything. You felt awfully stupid for letting him treat you like this, but having only him as your manager, you never wondered if these behaviors were normal or not, and so you accepted everything. Every day, from when you got up to when you went to bed, you felt nervous and anxious. You didn’t feel like talking to anyone, and as soon as you could, you’d go somewhere to eat or spend some time alone listening to music to calm down. Sometimes you were so overwhelmed by your thoughts that you would cry whatever you were doing, and music was the only thing that could calm you down. One of the things you were most afraid of during the day was having to interact with Aizawa or be alone with him. You were always trying to do your job quickly so you could end up when the bell rang so you could go away with the kids, and spend as little time as possible in the teachers' room so you could not interact with him or other teachers. With Ereserhead you only spoke when he wanted to know something about one of his boys or to give you some job, but even there you limited the conversation to a minimum. You could talk even less about him. When you finished work, you’d lock yourself in the room and not go out until the next morning. You’d stopped checking your cell phone, and by now it was all about notifications from Rumi and the record company’s top brass. You didn’t have the mental strength to respond or visualize anything. When you were on your computer writing reports about the 1-A kids, you didn’t go on the Internet because you didn’t want to go check your PO box or the latest news about you on the Internet. You were literally out of this world. It also became complicated to do the simplest job, because all the tears you repressed during the day came out in droves when you were in your room. Sometimes it took you hours to finish something, which usually took you about 20 minutes. You hated being like this. And you were also thinking that when you watched that play under layers of blankets in bed on Friday nights. The Saturday morning arrived, with the clear sky and the fresh air that now made the few leaves that remained on the trees fly away. Inside the 1-A dormitory, the students had gathered in small groups in the large living room. There were people who did homework, who read manga or did internet research for all sorts of things. You were helping Mina, Kirishima, and Sero with their math homework, and you promised them after you noticed how hard all three of them were working on that subject and also to distract you a little from your thoughts. The atmosphere was quiet until the alarm sounded. The students all looked at each other worried, couldn’t figure out what was going on. "I'm asking to all students to stay in their dorms, there is nothing to worry about." Echoed the calm voice of Principal Nezu in the area's speakers. "I request to all teachers to come immediately to the main entrance." As soon as he finished the sentence, Aizawa came out of his room with a clearly irritated expression. "(Y/S/N) stay here and keep an eye on them." Said the teacher wearing his scarf. "Do not try to come out for any reason or you'll have chores for three months. Understood?" "Yes, Teacher!" Shouted the kids at unison with a slight blink of panic in their voices. You looked Aizawa in a worry face while he bolted out of the dorm, you were hoping nothing bad will happen to him.As Aizawa made his way to the main entrance, he noticed, first of all, that there was no sound that foreshadowed a fight or an assault. So they probably shouldn’t have fought. As he approached the entrance, he noticed a great rumour and the lights that looked like photographic flashes. It was too late when he realized that all the teachers were called to the entrance to face one of the things he hated most in the world: the journalists.

[oceanivoxjoquainx]

Let's talk about Eric Effiong

Let's be honest Eric's storyline and characterization is one of the most appealing out of all the characters in Sex Education periodt. A true gay, fierce, Drag QUEEN and I feel like ranting about this amazing force of nature. (Spoilers. Duh.)

When I saw the trailer for Sex Education it didnt even hit me that Eric was gay until I read the synopsis. Was just like "Oh I wonder which one of these three mains are the gay one people keep talking about" even after I saw him in drag like a dumbass 😣😂. Personally im glad we've reached a point where gay guys aren't overly feminine and even the brightest colours won't differ a character from the rest (unless I'm just a blind bish and he was obviously gay from the trailer) ei 👏🏾 ther 👏🏾 way; his character was refreshing when I started watching the show. I immediately clicked with him and knew what every look he gave or hand gesture he did meant. Felt nice. When Adam pushed him into the locker for the first time and started with the heterohomoerotic bs I knew that Adam had a raging boner for Eric and was another internalized homophobic bully™ and wasn't really excited for what was to come but I knew it was coming and tbh I liked it in the end.

Eric and Otis' friendship is so pure. Like?!? Get me a straight supportive bestie lilke Otis? Ik they fought but even then Otis was respectful and kept his boundaries and let Eric go through the motions before immediately belting into an apology at the first chance he got. Their dancing scene?!? Iconic. The fact that Eric sees Otis' house as safe and another home?!? Iconic. Otis going drag with Eric to watch an LGBT+ movie as a TRADITION (meaning they've done it numerous times)?!?! Iconic. The fact that Otis was straight up ditching Eric and Eric STILL tolerated him and let him do his thing without too much pressure!?! The most iconic of them all. Just pure love and respect all around.

I am so proud of Erics growth over the course of the season starting from a naive and scared gay doormat to facing homophia and getting beat up by those assholes on his birthday no less to losing his best friend and becoming depressed to channeling that anger into defending himself when people tried him to getting his sparkle back and coming back more fierce that ever before.

Speaking of him getting his sparkle back lets talk about that and why that scene is so important. A random guy asked Eric for directions and Eric noticed his nails were polished and the guy was wearing earrings and he was a big ole black dude. He was like Eric. When Eric noticed that the guy was out, loud, glamorous and proud he immediately switched back into the bright colourful and wonderfully gay Eric we all know and love.

THIS IS WHY REPRESENTATION MATTERS!!!!

It shows people that its okay to be who they actually are and inspires those who are lost to find or return to their true selves. Representation isn't just some offhand thing to throw on a character last minute. And even if you can relate to other characters who arent like you, it is always an amazing feeling to have a character that IS like you. It turned Eric from a popularity seeking doormat into a hurricane with 6 inch heels who was ready to straight up beat down a bully he's had for 4 years. It even inspired him to go back to church and rejoin a community that he closed off. That's exactly how it feels to have someone successful in the media and your life to look up to. Eric only interacted with that man for a few minutes but those few minutes changed his life for the better. So that's a lovely reminder for all who love to bash representation.

Back tracking to Eric's dull colourless period after the attack and his fight with Otis. It was saddening to see one of the brightest characters go dull and even the school felt it. He turned from a guy who rarely stood up for himself and what he wanted into the sass master he reserved only for his friends. All of his built up anger was released causing him to explode on Mr Hendricks (who is adorable tbh and just trying to do his best) and Anwar (I was proud of that punch you go glenn co co) and he even sounded off on his dad who he's usually passive aggressive to at worst. Just goes to show that the happiest faces can harbor the biggest pains and can snap. Moral of the story? Protect the happy few.

Eric also has a great family. Like that obviously know Erics gay and wears dresses because its all right there in his room which his parents enter at their leisure and while it seems that they're a bit homophobic its revealed that they (Erics dad at least) just wants Eric to be safe as he's already a target for being black and apart of an immigant family. He accepts Eric for who he is and what he does he just doesnt want anyone else to give him shit for it and if that's not one of the sweetest things in this world idek what is. Eric and his dad was probably one of my favorite dynamics in the show and watching his dad slowly fully accept that his son was strong and able to stand for himself he was able to become stronger too. This dynamic is important because I never see any gay black characters have a close relationship with their fathers and it was very heartwarming to watch.

Now onto Erics love life. He has a crush on the highschools other only gay guy Anwar who's the typical mean sassy gay we've all come to expect in highschool dramas. Otis saying that Eric doesnt have to have a crush on the only other openly gay guy at school was such a mood as its commonly shown that any gays in close proximity should get together. When Eric punched him I internally went "Finally!" Because all those jeers were becoming annoying. I'm glad Anwar got to come out to his mum over it though. And straight up told the audience that Eric didn't like feminine guys (alluding to him and Adams eventual clean up scene as of we didn't see it coming already).

Moving on to Adam tho, like I said we all been knew that this

was indeed coming and even though I hate the bully x bullied trope I still ended up liking it and hoping that Adam would change. The building up to that kiss was long awaited from episode 1 straight through to 8 with all the longing looks that Adam kept side glancing Eric with and the face cupping and the growls and the lingering touches. I just kept going sthdjksksbslaldbd when one of those moments happened followed shortly after with disgust because gays falling for their abuser is washed up but then immediately going back to jajaklamabsldkd because im shipping trash so 🤷🏿. Eric stepping to Adam in at the ball was one of the most iconic scenes of the show (along with the "Its My Vagina" scene) and the exchange between him and Adam gave be actual chills. The tension was THICCCC. Erics OUTFIT to the ball gave me chills 😭😭 dude came to slay and had everyone at that school proper shook and I honestly could NOT be more proud. I was hoping Adam would become a better person over the course of the season but nope so hopefully they cover all the issues that Adam has in season 2 and properly give him a redeption arc cuz he's still a trashy pos he's just a disaster bi on top of it. (Adam immediately going to suck Eric off is confidence I can only dream of achieving 💀💀) The lab scene was also cute but made me mad because how could Adam look scared, confident and still be a douchebag all in the span of a few seconds was beyond me. A+ acting on Connor Swindells part. I can see why Adam would have to stay in the closet and keep their... relationship?? a secret because it seems like Headmaster Groff would be a homophobic piece of shit and would add to the ever growing list of things Adam did wrong. Even so it doesn't excuse the fact that Adam is in fact a bully and Eric deserves much better. Was sad seeing Adam being driven off from Eric in the end tho. Eric thought that Adam didn't want to see him at all and was probably heartbroken and probably thinks Adam left because of him (my poor baby 😭😭). I feel bad for Adam too because he was just starting to express himself and was at the beginning of a redemption arc when he was just wisked away from the boy he's loved for what seems to be a very long time. I just want my boys to be happy and non toxic and I wish their relationship and them all the best in Season 2.

Eric Effiong is my favorite character in the show and I really want to thank Ncuti Gatwa for portraying him so well and for the shows writers who gave him a very fleshed out character with an amazing storyline and conclusion. His growth was incredible and his strength is immeasurable. I'm 100% certain that he will be a character the community remembers for years to come. Patiently now waiting on what's to come in Season 2 💙🙌🏾.

[photochoco]

Two Sides of the Same Coin

Chapter 3 The Rally 

Touko attends her first Plasma rally undercover. Some ice cream would be nice.

--- -- ---

Touko adjusted the belt of her uniform and smoothed out the smock before giving herself a final look over in the mirror. Clean and professional. Perfect!

It hadn’t even been a full week since she joined Team Plasma as a low-ranking grunt, and they were already preparing for a rally in Striaton City. From what Touko could tell, it was going to be a long trip there, so they were preparing to leave a few days ahead of the scheduled time to set up.

“Hey Lysandra!” Andrea called, poking her head into the barracks. “Sorry I’m late, the meeting ran long. Let’s head to the train station!”

“If you don’t mind me asking,” Touko said as the pair made their way to the exit tunnel, “What are the meetings you go to for?”

“I don’t mind! I’m part of the King’s Council. It’s a specific legion of Grunts that work closely with Lord N and the Seven Sages in multiple forms of business. Currently, we are helping the King and Sages pinpoint the possible locations of the Light Stone.” Andrea let out a tired laugh and scratched her cheeks with a finger. “...We’re also supposed to accompany Lord N to rallies and other places, but he gives us the slip so often, we’ve sort of given up on that front. I think he prefers being alone.”

The woman turned to look at Touko, who stared at her right back with wide eyes.

“Haha, piqued your interest, have I?”

Touko flustered. “W-Well! I mean, a little.”

Andrea laughed again in amusement. “I’m not surprised you’re interested, it’s a highly sought after position. It’s the highest rank a Grunt can be, and it’s quite different from being a Face Member who represents Team Plasma publicly. It’s also, like, really hard to get into. You have to be personally selected by Lord N, and approved by Ghetsis. And being picked by our King is pretty hard, since he doesn’t interact with others much. And Lord Ghetsis...ahehe...he’s a very intelligent and patient man, but he’s also very strict. And hard to please. He only approves candidates if he feels their loyalty to Team Plasma is unwavering.”

“Like you!” Touko pointed out. “How long did it take you?”

Andrea glowed with pride. “The King’s Council is generally made up of senior members. To be considered senior, you have to have been part of Plasma for 1-2 years, generally since the organization is so new. I’m one of the newer members of the legion.”

Touko was elated at this new information. Finally, she had found a way to get closer to N and find out more about what he was planning. But at the same time...1-2 years? She was only planning to be undercover for 2-4 months! But if it was the best way, if not the only way to find out what Team Plasma was doing, what choice did she have?

Determination set in.

“I’m going to become part of that council!” she said aloud.

Andrea looked at the girl’s blazing eyes and nodded approvingly.

“I like your attitude, kid. I can tell, you’ve got determination. You’ll totally get into the Council. Just remember: loyalty and passion go a long way here.”

“Hey!!” Brandon poked his head into the room, making both girls jump. The train will be leaving soon, hurry up already you Slowpokes!”

---

The scenery whizzed by in a blur outside the window, a beautiful display, but Touko found herself being pulled away from the window and listening to the conversation of her fellow coworkers.

“Did you hear? Lord N might be attending this one!” a kinky-haired grunt said excitedly.

That caught Touko’s attention.

“I thought he attended all the rallies,” she said.

“Oh no, usually Lord N avoids them. He’s not too fond of crowds.”

That is true, isn’t it...Back in Accumula Town, he’d put distance between himself and the rest of the crowd.

“Yeah, wasn’t the last rally he attended in Accumula? Where he met that girl Trainer?”

Touko stiffened.

“Oh yeah! Wasn’t her name Touko or something?” a second grunt chimed in.

“I think so? Ever since that rally he’s been interested in her. He met her a couple more times after that to try to find out more about her, I think. Kinda weird, huh? I mean, she’s just some Trainer!”

Touko swiftly turned her head back to the window, her face burning. How could they be so blase about what was probably a declaration of stalking? N really could do no wrong in their eyes, huh? She then smiled to herself.

He was “so interested” in her, yet he had no idea she had wormed her way into his team of self-righteous thieves..

I swear on my life, I will find out what you’re planning.

Then I’ll sweep the fucking rug out from under you.

--- --- ---

It was hot. It was too fucking hot. Touko tugged at the collar her uniform. Good god, this sucked.

Ghetsis was still talking, and Touko silently thanked whatever benevolent force that protected her from being one of the Grunts that stood at attention behind the tall man. They all stood perfectly in line with a rigidity that made them resemble statues. While Touko admired the discipline she was sure it took to stand still for that long, not moving, with the summer sun beating down, it was a bit...unnerving. Since she was so new, she was spared from standing on the stage with the entourage, but it was still horribly uncomfortable. Finally, she couldn’t take it any longer, and retreated into the shade of a nearby tree. The coolness was comforting, and the teen leaned against the trunk, suddenly feeling quite overwhelmed.

Two years…? She’d need to get into the Council at over six times that speed, there was no way she was going to stay undercover for one or two years, waiting. And she was sure Team Plasma and N weren’t going to wait for her, either.

Damn...what am I gonna do…

She jumped as she felt her fingers bump against another hand.

“Oh, pardon me, I didn’t see you there.” N poked his head out from the other side of the trunk, tipping his cap in apology. He blinked in surprise when he saw who it was. Touko leapt back and started to bow several times.

“L-Lord N! I’m so sorry, I didn’t see you!”

N held up his hands. “Whoa, h-hey, like I said, you don’t need to be so formal with me, please.”

“Oh. I’m sorry L-- sir.”

“It’s alright.”

The pair then lapsed into an awkward silence. Touko did her best to not look at N for too long for fear he’d recognize her.

“...Are you hot?” he finally said to break the quiet.

“--Excuse me?”

“Are you too hot in that uniform? It’s pretty sunny out, and it looks like it might be pretty uncomfortable.”

“It’s fine.”

“Are you sure? Your face is red--”

“I said I’m fine!!” The heat frayed Touko’s nerves and she snapped without meaning to.

N stared at her with a startled expression and Touko cursed inwardly.

Fuck fuck fuck I blew it I fucked it up--

“I’m sorry,” she mumbled. “The heat must be getting to me.”

N was silent for a moment, but to Touko it seemed like an eternity. He looked around.

“Ah, there’s an ice cream stand over there. Would you like some?” he pointed to a nearby ice-cream cart.

That...wasn’t what she had expected. “I--”

“C’mon!” Before she could decline or even protest, N grabbed her hand and practically dragged her to the stand.

“L--S-Sir! Really, I’m--”

“Really Lysandra, you don’t need to be so formal! Just N is fine,” N smiled at her, and Touko snapped her mouth shut at the sight of that grin and surrendered herself to his pulling.

She had to remind herself he wasn’t smiling at her. Not really. Still, it felt weird.

A few minutes later, as Ghetsis reached his closing statements, Touko and N walked back towards the rally, each licking a large ice cream cone. N insisted on paying for it himself, and Touko must have thanked him roughly ten times. She decided at least two of those thank you’s were genuinely from her.

The pair was happy to simply eat in silence and listen to Ghetsis’ speech. Now that Touko really paid attention to him, she realized Ghetsis was a very good public speaker. In fact, he was alarmingly good. Her insides wriggled uncomfortably. Even though the nonsense he was spouting about Pokemon suffering under humans was, well, nonsense, he definitely was not spinning it that way. If someone gave what he said thought, he truly might end up swaying people. It was alarming and incredible at the same time.

Time to really play the part. Touko decided.

“That was quite an impressive speech,” she spoke up. “I hope this doesn’t come off as rude, but I wasn’t expecting such eloquent words. Spoken from the heart.”

Bleh. Well-written bullshit.

N smiled again, one of those smiles that reached his eyes.

“It makes me happy to hear that. I uh, I wrote it myself.” His cheeks tinted bashfully.

“You did?!” A note of sincerity slipped into Touko’s voice, but she didn’t notice. “That’s amazing! You’re a very talented writer.”

N’s entire face flushed pink and he quickly pulled the brim of his baseball cap down.

“You flatter me, Lysandra. I just write what I feel, it’s my father who manages to put so much feeling into the speeches.”

“Speeches?” Touko echoed.

“I write most of the rally speeches, actually.”

“Whoa, that’s cool! I didn’t know that!”

“Most people don’t,” he mumbled.

As Touko continued to eat her cone, she racked her brain for something else to say that N would like.

Aha!

“It was after one of those speeches that I thought for a long time about my relationship with my Pokemon. In the end, I...I released them.”

She thought of her Pokemon, unreleased, but not with her. Her voice caught on a lump forming in her throat.

“I miss them a lot sometimes. But, their happiness was the most important thing to me. If they were happier being free, I couldn’t deny them that.”

N’s right hand made a slight movement like he wanted to place it on Touko’s shoulder, but decided against it.

“So, I take it you don’t have a Pokemon right now?”

“No. Er...was I supposed to keep one of them to assist me?”

N shook his head. “Pretty much all Plasma members are provided Pokemon to help us achieve our goals. It’s temporary of course. Once we take over the League and establish a no-Pokemon policy, all Pokemon will be released.”

But,” he added. “If you don’t have a companion yet, I can arrange to have a Pokemon given to you.”

Touko quickly swallows the last of her cone in her haste to answer.

“Really?! Thank you, N!”

Before N could say anything more, a group of Grunts walked up to the pair. They were accompanied by Ghetsis himself. Touko snapped to attention and bowed at the sight of him.

“Ah, I’m sorry to cut this short, but I must be going. I will speak to you later about a temporary Pokemon,” N said.

With a wave, he walked off with Ghetsis and the rest of his legion. Touko watched him go, a feeling of triumph growing in her belly. She still had a long way to go, but after all that, she felt miles closer to her goal than she had this morning.

“Ohohoooooo, what’s this?”

A finger prods Touko’s cheeks. Andrea stood next to Touko, leaning in close with a mischievous grin. Did someone have some ice cream?”

“Yeah, and? What’s it to ya?” Touko shot back playfully.

“I saw ice cream on Lord N’s face, too. What were you two kids up to, hmmm~?”

Touko’s face burned.

“Oh please, as if! He just bought us some because it’s so hot out!”

This made Andrea’s eyebrows shoot up in surprise.

“Well, that’s surprising! Lord N doesn’t do things like that with Grunts, or anyone else, for that matter.” She nudged Touko playfully with her elbow. I dunno what you did, but Lord N sure seems to have taken a shine to you. Just don’t tell Ghetsis, or he may think you’re after his heart, hehehe.”

Touko rolled her eyes. “Oh god, in his nightmares. Like I’d try to distract N from his duties, they’re too important!”

Andrea nodded sagely, but her sly grin never left her face.

“Don’t worry kiddo, your secret’s safe with me. Mainly cuz the other like, 80 grunts who have a crush on Lord N would be super jealous if they found out he got you ice cream. Now, let’s get out of this heat!”

As the pair began to hurry to the train station, Touko’s chest felt lighter than it had in days. She was getting closer, she could feel it. Maybe N wasn’t as difficult to figure out as she had initially thought. <- Previous Next ->

[animebw]

Binge-Watching: Anohana, Episodes 3-5

In which the illusion sadly breaks and I’m forced to recognize some imperfections, but we’re far from a lost cause yet. Also, I’m officially adopting Menma and I apologize for nothing.

Splinters

God dammit, I was worried about this. Those first two episodes of Anohana were walking such a delicate balancing act, an almost impossibly effortless mastery of tonal/visual/stylistic production and craft that seemed far too large for words to properly capture. They were raw, they were honest, they were lived-in, and above all else, they were completely self-assured. It was the kind of production that felt like it could only come from this show, the kind of ephemeral sense of a story that leaves you with no way to describe it but to say “Yep, that’s Anohana, alright,” and trust that your audience knows exactly what you’re talking about. It was honestly perfect at being what it wanted to be; too perfect, sadly, to last. Maybe it was only a matter of time before that magic wore off and I was forced to recognize that in the end, Anohana is still an anime, equally capable of delighting or disappointing as any other. Hell, not even Mushishi could maintain its perfect supertextual artistry past the first season. If there are cracks in a story, then at some point, they’re going to come out, whether you want them to or not. But it should be noted that while I have my criticisms of some of the aspects of Anohana that have started popping up, none of them doom the show. None of them are dealbreakers, or completely kill the experience. It’s just that they drag the show down to being good when before it was stunning. And that kind of disappointment can hurt a lot more than an abject failure; there’s no more frustrating feeling than thinking something you love has started to let you down, even if only a little.

The problem is, what made Anohana’s opening episodes sing is that for as obviously anime as they were, they didn’t feel like they took place in an anime world. They felt like part of our world, where people exist and talk and interact with their surroundings much like we do. I didn’t see the character quirks of Jintan, Menma, Anaru and all the rest; I saw the people they were, how they interacted with each other, how they existed in the grubby, scuffy, lived-in spaces they inhabited. It was by far one of the most verisimilitudinous anime experience I’ve ever had, even more so than the hyper-realistic stylings of Kyoto Animation that make them my favorite anime studio. But as the story has gone on, it’s added in new elements that shatter that illusion, characters and story points that feel too, well, “anime”, for lack of a better word to fit that same sensation.

Tsukuro is the biggest offender here; as fun a character as she is with her po-faced badassery (”I figured who should bring some ghost story props.”), she’s too obviously not a real teenager. She’s too perceptive, too emotionally composed, too much an obvious character archetype- the friend who sees through everyone’s bullshit perfectly- to feel real in the same way. There’s not a single moment over the course of her time on screen where she shows any sense of an inner struggle, any sort of push and pull between emotional states that leads her to the choices she makes. What makes Jintan so compelling a protagonist is that I feel the anguish inside of him, the constant undercurrent of despair that hits home for anyone who’s experienced a tragedy they struggle to get over. It’s an undercurrent throughout the entire show... but Tsukuro doesn’t seem like she’s swimming in the same stream. Even just a little sense that there’s a life and conflict under her composed exterior would go a long way to make her just as endearing and lifelike as her peers. Sure, it’s satisfying to watch her call out her friend’s grief-driven scheme (”Just shave your legs!”), knocking his arrogant ass down a peg and dragging him into the emotional muck with the rest of them, but I never get the sense that she ever so much as dips her toe in.

And on that subject, while Yukiatsu crossdressing as Menma to fool everyone into thinking she’d returned and then breaking down when confronted was undoubtedly a powerful moment, it’s another aspect that feels like it comes from another, less grounded story. It’s a fairly shocking character swerve to just be left sitting there upon completion, with no real expansion yet as to the kind of person he is to process his grief in such an extreme fashion. But the worst moment comes directly after he saves Amaru from a rapey creep; while that scene itself was genuinely horrifying and uncomfortable and completely in keeping with the fully realized world this show established so early on, their following conversation on the train reeked of lazy anime writing. We couldn’t save the flustered virgin bit until at least a little after said virgin was almost seriously hurt in a truly horrifying fashion? Seriously, imagine what a raw emotional headspace Amaru must have been in following her brush with assault, and it’s in that moment that Yukiatsu starts needling her insecurities, only to face no consequences but a blushing anime girl? It’s honestly kind of insulting in a way that I find impossible to defend; Anohana was supposed to be better than this. It was supposed to treat its world and characters with genuine respect. That was the promise those first two episodes made to me, and it’s disheartening to see that promise start to get walked back. I want this show to succeed so fucking badly, so please, don’t give me any more reasons to doubt you.

GOD I LOVE HER

Thank the gods, then, that Anohana has nowhere near squandered all the goodwill it’s built up. It would take a lot to completely shatter my faith in it after how stellar its opening volley was. And nowhere is that clearer than with Menma the ghost girl herself, who was completely and utterly stolen my heart over the course of these episodes. Any loser can whip up a cute anime girl and call it day, but it takes talent to craft someone like Menma, who’s not just so frigging adorable I want to pinch her cheeks every time she’s on screen, but adorable in ways that feel so fucking genuine. She’s all the excitability of childhood perfectly captured with that same honest filter of reality, processing a complicated world through a determined, spirited lens. And dear lord, she is amazing. I feel myself pausing the video to take notes at almost every single line of hers, that’s how often she puts a smile on my face. Taking advantage of the whole “wish” thing to make Jintan play along to her tune. Excitedly searching for the second “Menma” as if she completely forgot that’s who she was in the first place (”Maybe he saw my ghost!” “Then what would that make you?”). Hanging on Poppo’s shoulders to just casually go pee with him. ”There’s egg shells in here.” “Um... calcium!” I don’t think I’ve ever had such a visceral urge to Dad the shit out of a fictional character since Kagura, and even she would’ve have kicked my ass for trying.

But in the true spirit of Anohana, beneath that bubbly, excitable exterior is someone capable of real emotional depth, someone who can cry and laugh just as easily either way. In a lot of ways, Menma is both the most adept at hiding her emotional pain and yet the quickest to express it regardless, desperately trying to keep her fractured friends on the same page even as every false start lands like a crushing blow to her heart. She can’t even lie to Jintan’s dead mother about being happy with her current situation without tears leeching from her eyes, letting us know in no uncertain terms how deeply she’s truly hurting. And that one gut-wrenching moment when Poppo steals her attempt to say the gang’s old catchphrase, pulling her up short as she remembers that she’s still invisible to almost all the people she cares about? And she can only stand in minor shock as tears start dripping down? Fucking hell, that was painful to watch. I use the word “raw” a lot while talking about this show’s emotions, and there’s no better example of that than the cruelty with which such an exuberant little girl’s happiness is so easily snatched away by a completely inescapable mistake.

And yet, she never gives up trying for everyone else’s sake. Even after how disastrously the barbecue ends for her, the first thing she does when she and Jintan get back home is try and cheer him up with dumb Mario references and an improvised doll puppet theater (”My good boy radar is going off!”)   Because sometimes, it pays to let yourself feel goofy when you’d rather flinch away from feeling anything. And dear lord, I felt my heart grow three sizes at how unabashedly she was trying. It’s such a beautiful moment, such a perfect encapsulation of her wonderful character, that by the time it’s over, you’d follow this girl to the pits of hell and back if it meant paying back the happiness she gave to you. That’s the power of Anohana, and while it might not shine as brightly as it promised, it’s still shining really damn bright.

Odds and Ends

-WE DO NOT SMACK OUR DEAD CHILDHOOD GIRLFRIENDS IN THE FACE WITH OUR DIRTY SHIRT I SWEAR TO GOD JINTAN

-”Ventla, Ventla, Space People!” Poppo, you’re cool by me.

-”Welcome home!” “Eh.. I’m home.” aksjdhaksjdhas DORKS

-”Looks like barf!” The things chick says with a smile on her face, I swear.

-”I don’t want to be cute. I’m not my dad.” I dunno, it suits you.

-”You’re a winner chicken.” “Either way, I’m still a chicken.” Hey, chicken’s tasty, don’t devalue that.

-askjdhaskd yeah watch the curtains

-”Now I can’t see.” Congrats, you played yourself.

-Listen, when the snap of a freaking pocky can be so definitive, you know you’ve got a good thing going.

-”Plus, gotta catch One Piece.” Oh, that you have the rights for, but Pokemon was too much. Sure.

-”I want to be able to talk to everyone!” Jesus fuck, can these ED drops get any more evil?

Goddamn, this is one heck of a show. See you next time!

[fit-as-fxck]

hi. I have a lengthy update and a story.

Good Evening, Friends. Here’s an update that no one asked for. I continue to feel much, much better. I can credit that to a constant, normalized sleep schedule, a reduction of the constant stress of the last three months and making sure I eat. As far as movement goes that’s exactly what I've been focusing on. m o v e m e n t. This doesn't mean always going to the gym and slamming weights around, this means moving more intuitively and listening to what I want to do and what I need (without putting too much pressure on myself to be rigid with set demands). Some days I take my dog with me to the park while I do outdoor yoga (in preparation for my outdoor classes I always do in the summer). Sometimes I meet up with a friend and hit the trails for an easy run. Sometimes, doing “nothing” is more important and takes precedence. (If you don't want to read this all skip down to the bottom for a lil story I guarantee you’ll want to read.)

Habits/personal: Every morning make it a point to tell myself I'm going to stay present today. That’s my goal. To stay present and take advantage of every moment, and yes, it comes down to actively monitoring my habits. Even things like social media and electronic use impacts us and none of us were given a manual on how to navigate this shifting terrain. So yeah, reading an actual book before bed and shutting down devices actually does make a difference on our mind and body. Sometimes, we have to set rules for ourselves depending on our lives and how we know we respond to things like this. I’m starting a gratitude journal too so that’ll be new journey for me (it’s scientifically proven to lower inflammation in the body). My life is starting to go back to “normal”, finally. I was under intense life stressors for a few months. 

Training: 

I’ve done some easy trail runs with my friend (the one who was my old gym partner). His training is ramping up significantly and mine is just now recovering so I've only been joining him on his easy recovery runs. The first one I did, my legs felt like two ton bricks. It felt like I was running through jello. I’m not embarrassed to say it was just awful. Consider that I spent since October not putting an emphasis on cardio (only some conditioning), so yeah not surprising. The good news is, it only sucks for a little bit and then it gets better. I mean, each run I do I'll never have to redo again lmao. I hate treadmill running unless I'm doing sprints. I always choose outdoor if I can. I haven't done any major strength training and I’ve probably lost a lot of strength but I'm not worried about it. Muscle has a memory. I’m ready to pick up some strength training again but my goals right now are more geared towards movement and cardio (so the strength training will be to support that). And of course, yoga. I love doing more and more of it. It just makes you feel so damn good. Plan: adding cardio in 4 times weekly. Alternating between cycling, running, trail running, moderate intensity and intervals. Finishing with a handful of lifting exercises a couple times a week to stay strong. 

Nutrition:

Like I mentioned, I am making sure to eat. And haven't been too strict about it, like, at all. I’ve been fueling on pb&j’s. (Side note: I am always making sure I keep my caffeine intake low, I feel better without it. I do half-caff coffee mostly.) I’m increasing my workouts since I'm feeling good so my nutrition is going to be shifted to support those goals. I don't want be too extreme so I'll be following an 80/20 diet. 80% clean Whole Foods and 20% Oreos and Snickers (jk). A major pitfall of mine is failing to prepare to have food when I need it. This week, and for the following weeks, I'm meal prepping everything (which I should be doing anyways *glares* @ me). I’m sticking to whole, “clean” foods and following basic nutrition principles. I’m 100% sure you can make progress on nearly any “diet” as long as you follow nutritional fundamentals. I feel better when I eat better anyways. Sometimes we have to go back to basics. Foundations are what we build everything on and any tweaks we do to that foundation are just the “fluff” on top. Don’t want that foundation to have cracks in it, do we? (SO this week I made a homemade Mac and cheese. Most times I burn everything but sometimes my attempts are a slam dunk. I made my own cheese sauce and used half noodles and half shredded cauliflower to increase the volume and MAN IT WAS BOMB. YOU GOTTA TRY IT. YOU COULDNT EVEN TELL THERE WAS CAULIFLOWER IN IT. Sneaky vegetables.) Unfortunately, I'll have to cut out the Mac & cheese and pb&j’s BUT if it’s the weekend and I want a bagel, I'm gonna have a bagel (80/20 ok). I’m prepping things like grass fed beef, vegetables and sweet potates or rice etc (yes, its potates). 

Other (friends/lifestyle/inspo):

So I got a call from my gym buddy this week which I did not expect. When he started working out with me in January(?) he was what you would call “skinny-fat”, which is defined as not looking overweight but also not having any distinguishable muscle tone. Since then he’s put some serious size and strength and totally upped his cardio game. I started him out on some basic training and knowledge and then he continued on his own. When he called me he told me a man approached him in the gym and asked what he was training for. He told him he was training for an iron man (his overall bucket list goal). This is a hefty goal considering he started at ground zero. BUT everyone starts at zero and he is young and you won’t see me telling him he can’t do it. You can do anything you put your mind to. My friend told the guy about how he went down to 135 pounds at his thinnest (dude is like over 6 feet tall) and then went up 65 pounds at his heaviest. Well, they got to talking and this man started telling him about his friends going through BUDS training (SEAL training). And, my friend spilled the beans. He told him that he hadn't told anyone yet but his overall goal was to go out for the Seals. Yeah, aggressive goal. Thats when the guy told him he was special forces (ranger). He told him David Goggins was headed through town and they were all going to dinner with him. Yeah, I know, sounds odd. Anyways, this guy told him that the only difference between him and the ones that made it, was that now it was his turn to do it. That’s it. (Pretty crazy considering like 6% of people that go out for this pass). So my friend told him he “didn’t know anyone”. The guy told him that there were a ton of special forces in this area but they don’t tell you they are unless they want you to know. But, my dude meant he quite literally didn’t. know. anyone. He had lost all his friends when he found out they had different priorities and pretty much has no one around him supporting him on this, which is why he called me when he was astounded this happened. Serendipity, I guess. Put your goals out there into the world with iron conviction and the universe will find a way to meet you halfway. So this guy was 38 I think and didn’t look his age (not that 38 is old..) and told dude that he could probably smoke everyone in this gym and well, he could, based on the workouts he was doing. My friend’s jaw was on the floor with this whole interaction. He told me he was nervous and stumbling over his words and felt like he probably made an ass of himself. He apologized for it, saying he barely got any sleep and was super stressed and the guy said “Who gets sleep? And we’re all stressed.” The guy offered his advice and networking anytime dude sees him in the gym etc. 

We all come from somewhere, we all have dark, broken histories, large goals, even larger struggles etc and feel like our lives consist of constantly trying to pull it together until the day we die but, I swear, you gotta find a way to believe in yourself and even accept your failures. Whats the worst that could happen? You die trying? At least you followed your heart. Just like this dude, out of shape, stumbling, mad at himself because of slow progress but just look back three or four months... He’s strong now and the progress happened because he was patient with himself and didn’t give up even when he felt like it and he’s still not done. More power to him and anyone willing to try. Perhaps the overall goal doesn't matter as much as who we become in the act of trying (thank you Kaylo Littlejohn for that quote). Most times, people just need a positive push in the right direction. Maybe we can focus a little bit more on uplifting and being positive because that shit is contagious. 

[dailyaudiobible]

02/20/2019 DAB Transcript

Leviticus 9:7-10:20, Mark 4:26-5:20, Psalms 37:30-40, Proverbs 10:6-7

Today is the 20th day of February. Welcome to the Daily Audio Bible. I am Brian again with a big smile on my face because I am happy, but I am forcing this smile because I am tired. But that's okay. You know, jet lag is something that dissipates. Greetings from the land of the Bible. We are in Ashdod on the shores of the Mediterranean Sea with the ocean out there and it's beautiful as always. Ashdod was a Philistine stronghold, one of their five governing cities back in the day. And we haven't gotten to this point in our reading from the Scriptures we’re we begin to interact with the Philistines, but the Israelites and the Philistines were not always compatible, but our modern Ashdod is a coastal city and this is where we all gathered and got to know each other a bit last night and kind of just interact a little. Excitement is high. Fatigue is fairly high. Think we’re gonna be running largely on adrenaline today but that makes for a good night’s sleep tonight and that's what we need. So, today we’ll be heading out from Ashdod and heading south into the wilderness and I'll share that story tomorrow. But today, we need to get into the Scriptures and take the next step forward. That will lead us back into the book of Leviticus. We’re reading from the Christian Standard Bible this week. Leviticus 9:7 through 10:20.

Commentary:

Okay. So, in the book of Matthew yesterday, Jesus used agricultural examples, seed and soil and types of soil and what happens to the seed based on what type of soil that it's planted in. And, so, as we came into today's reading from the gospel of Mark we find that Jesus wasn't done with that discussion. He just kind of expanded it to the whole of God's kingdom. And the example He used was how a farmer will go out and plant at the right time and then, you know, he’ll wake up and go to sleep and wake up and go to sleep and wake up and go to sleep, days will pass, even months will pass, both day and night and the plant will grow. The crop will grow even though the farmer doesn't have any control over it and has to patiently wait. And then Jesus also compared the kingdom of heaven to a tiny mustard seed, right? It’s the smallest of all seeds He said but then it becomes the largest of the plants in the field. So, Jesus chose these metaphors for reason and in part it would be because his hearers would understand the story but they are no less poignant for us today at all because, in effect Jesus is telling us that the kingdom of heaven is happening all the time, right, day and night, even while the farmer doesn't know how it's happening it is happening, right? And Jesus also says that the kingdom of heaven is a collaboration, right seed and soil and although it begins small and grows and spreads and flourishes and gives life as we patiently cultivate and participate in the harvest. So, the kingdom is everywhere, and the kingdom is now. And even though we’re waiting for the fullness of the harvest, right, the fullness of God's kingdom, we are supposed to be diligent in planting seeds and nurturing the growth and harvesting the fruit. And it's not just out facing into the world, like we need to plant good seeds of good behavior and plant little witnesses of Jesus all over the place, although that we are. It’s also supposed to be as near as our own heart. We have to consider what’s being planted inside of us, because whatever it is that's what's going to grow up around us and we don't want to have a lot of weeds planted in our lives and then they grow up without us even knowing how their growing up around us. We want to be good soil.

Prayer:

Father, we acknowledge all of this and we invite Your Holy Spirit to come. This is a year where we are supposed to maintain, which means we are supposed to do maintenance. And in so many ways this is exactly what You're talking about when we’re talking about being good soil and tending a garden and seeing the kingdom flourish, not only with in us, but around us everywhere we go. And we will not be able to maintain or cultivate this without Your Holy Spirit and we won't be able to plant these good seeds or allow them to be planted in our lives if we aren't good soil. So, come Holy Spirit, show us the thorny places, show us the rocky places, show us the stubborn places that need to become good soil. As we reclaim these stony and thorny places in our lives and cultivate good soil within them, then the garden of our heart is expanding, and we have more room for more harvest. So, come Holy Spirit we pray. In the mighty name of Jesus, we ask. Amen.

Announcements:

dailyaudiobible.com is the website, its home base, its where you find out what's going on around here.

And what's going on around here is that our journey, our pilgrimage throughout the land of the Bible, well, it kinda began last night at our dinner but we’ll all be loading up on the buses and going and seeing things today and changing geography. We will end up quite a ways south of where we are right now. We’re on the Mediterranean coast. So, we are, well, we’re essentially as westward as you can go in the land of the Bible because there's an ocean there, there's nowhere else to go. But we will be heading to the southernmost point of Israel today as we experience the wilderness. And we’ll be posting pictures, videos, anything that we can to kind of keep this an interactive process as it's happening. So, certainly follow Daily Audio Bible on all the social media channels. You can find them at dailyaudiobible.com in the Community section. And yeah, just asking for your prayers. This is kind of our inauguration day where we’re just kind of getting into a new rhythm of traveling around the way that we will be and experiencing the land the way that we will be and also getting to know each other the way that we will be over the next couple of weeks. So, thank you for your prayers.

If you want to partner with the Daily Audio Bible, you can do that at dailyaudiobible.com. There is a link, it's on the homepage, thank you profoundly. If you're using the Daily Audio Bible app, you can press the Give button in the upper right-hand corner or, if you prefer, the mailing address is PO Box 1996 Spring Hill Tennessee 37174.

And, as always, if you have a prayer request or comment, 877-942-4253 is the number to dial.

And that's it for today. I'm Brian I love you and I'll be waiting for you here tomorrow.

Community Prayer and Praise:

Hi, it’s Sherry from Kansas. I was just listening to community prayer from February 9th and I want to thank Candace from Oregon for sharing the song with us, “Hallelujah, what a Savior”. The song, the melody I just keep hearing it over and over and I want to sing it out. So, thank you so much for sharing that with us and I do want to say thank you to Brian and his family. Your program is changing my life and I know you’ve heard that before but since I called in on December…my prayer request was played on December 8th…my life is completely turning around, not my circumstances, but me. And the Bible is coming alive to me in a way it’s…it never has before, and I’ve been to Bible college, I graduated but now I’m reading the Bible, I’m listening to the Bible and I’m hearing things and seeing things I never saw before and it’s amazing! So, I am so grateful to all of you for praying for me and my brother Kenneth. I thank you Brian, I thank you Candace, I thank you Blind Tony for your poetry. Those poems are about life. It’s real. Thank you. Thank you for everyone who calls in and how encouraging it is to hear all of you. I love you so much and I’m telling everyone I know about Daily Audio Bible. Thank you. God, bless. Bye-bye.

Hello dear DAB family, a year ago, the 2018 Israel group was preparing this once-in-a-lifetime pilgrimage. Those vivid memories bring me joy and inspiration. I know all of you will join me in prayer. Dear Lord and Savior, protect, provide, challenge, and guide the 2019 Israel journey. Bless Brian and his family, the tour guides, the bus drivers, the hotel coordinators, and the pilgrims. This is a pilgrim’s prayer by Jenny Child. God of our pilgrimage, you have given us a desire to take the questing way and set out on our journey. Help us to keep our eyes fixed on Jesus, that whatever we encounter as we travel we may seek to glorify You by the way we live. Amen. Dear pilgrims, your encouraging fellow DABbers from all corners of the world join you virtually as you traverse the land of the Bible. This is Cindy who relocated to Texas from Germany. Love you all. God, bless.

Hello my DAB family, this is Mark Street from Sydney Australia, today is Saturday the 16th of February and Byron I’ve just heard your message about your son and I’m gonna say this quickly because I don’t have time to explain but I’m sure you’ve been hearing my story and my separation and I tell you Byron, you know, because of my unfaithfulness for God, my son was about 14 and he fell totally to pieces, went into drugs, went into to everything. And you know what Byron, when I fell down on my knees and started worshiping  God again and apologizing to God for not leading my children to Him and __ Byron you know what, I have seen my sons just miraculously change. And while they’re not worshiping God yet, God has put a sense of peace as long as I am faithful and keep praying for them then He will help change their hearts as well. And Byron, if he will do this for me who was unfaithful, I know Byron, keep praying, keep loving your son and it will work out fine. There may be some bumpy roads ahead Byron, but you know what, God will take you through them as well. So, I just want to quickly pray. Heavenly father, life can be messy Lord, which sends us into worries and concerns for our children Father. And Father we know that You love all Your creation so deeply that You sent Your son here to die for our sins Lord. So, Lord we ask You to look after Byron’s son, put him back on a path that You want Lord and give Byron and his whole family a sense of peace. We ask this in Your name Lord Jesus. Amen. Byron, love you man and always wonderful to hear your voice and your commitment to God as well. Love you family. Speak again soon. Mark Street from Sydney Australia.

Hi DABbers this is Keira calling from Denver, mile high city and listening to the encouragement last week…from last week. Maggie May, oh, the first time I heard your voice I just really…just really fell in love with you and I know you’re in that room and stuck. And I pray to the Lord, Yeshua, that you’re going to get a better space, living space. And I just…I just really started bawling, you know, when I heard you…we are all…I feel like I’m in a little room too…that I’m kind of stuck in. I think we all kind of imprison ourselves in our little rooms or the enemy has or somehow we got in there, but you know Maggie May, you’re crying out and you’re screaming out to God and, you know, He’s hearing you, we all hear you, I’m praying so hard for you. And I also just want to lift up again my son Nish, Nishua, who is somewhere out of contact. I just hope and pray that he’s associating with good, kind people and that he’s, you know, I know he’s on some path, his own path and I just pray that he find peace and I want him back in my life but I want most of all what God wants and I want to pray for my ex actually that he find…find peace and God. He has schizophrenia, schizoaffective…

[thatlittledandere]

boueibu for the fandom ask thingie

Nice there it is

How I entered/learned about the said game/show/movie/etc of that fandom

I think this post was the first one I saw. After that there were a couple more (I remember conquest club flower crowns being among the first ones) and one night I decided to watch the first 2 episodes on a whim. Then the third one the next day, fourth one came out a couple of days later. Anyway I knew it was my kinda show after approx. one minute and I just checked and my blog has 438 pages tagged boueibu so um ya

tl;dr: saw a post promising gay on tumblr and gave in to the impulse to actually check it out

Fave character

hhOW CoU LD i pOS SIbL Y CHoOOSe??

Least fave character

The twins;;; I admit I was very prejudiced before the season even started bc I knew that new characters need screentime so the audience gets to know them and I knew that attention was going to be reduced from the student council, but I’ve disliked many characters at some point and learnt to like all of them so I was hopeful the show and the fandom would get me to warm up to them eventually. So far it hasn’t happened.

The worst thing is, at this point I don’t even think it’s about the lack of meta analysis and positive posts that I’ve seen; it’s just that...what I’ve observed about them so far is pretty much all there is, and their characters just don’t appeal to me. At all. They’re the unlikable kind of assholes.

I’m sorry all VEPPer fans I still love you even if I strongly dislike your faves;;;

OTP(s)

fuck bitches get money

honorary mention:

“I hate your stupid handsome as hell face get your Adonis body off me at this instant”

Pairing that everyone likes but I don’t get

...I gotta say Akorima. I’m even a little surprised by how popular it is;;; Their interactions are nice and it’s not a bad ship but I just don’t really see any romantic spark between them in canon 

this has absolutely nothing to do with my possessiveness

Fave thing about the fandom

Where there’s people there’s going to be disagreements and annoyance some quarrels and miscommunication but it’s been two years and the fandom is still pretty damn good at being nice?? Not perfect but the amount of anon hate and deliberately attacking people has been considerably low.

The most despised thing

Where are my reader-insert fics the fuck

also the more kinky stuff why are y’all so vanilla

am i just into wrong ships

or on the wrong sites

If there is something I would change from said game/show/movie/etc., what would it be.

Gosh... Now I’m not a writer but first off I think the Italian twins in the name of the father, the son and the holy spirit forgive me for uttering the sinful salvatore name could have been handled in a lot more respective manner. Having them in the first place is not a problem, and younger one’s inferiority complex is a good place to start but... The way they went about it...;;; Like please could you tone down the gross and racist by like 90%

And of course the Beppus’ redemption needs to be worked on. For starters, they could have one. Boueibu is about love and forgiveness and learning from your mistakes so the twins joining forces with the good ones is not something I’m against in theory, but I mean... The finale didn’t really solve anything;;; They still only care about themselves and Gora and the rest just. Hogged them in. Decided that they’re “one or two of us” now with no real reason to do so other than being nice and plot. And the twins aren’t nice, they haven’t apologized, they don’t seem to have done anything to the tension. This isn’t even the Vegeta level “not evil anymore, basically on the good side, but still kinda antagonistic” thing, they didn’t change or repent one bit and I’m mad the writers can do so much better than this

[unpopular-bishop]

i've realized why i'm still upset with duen and all it took was an awful night's sleep!!

the bohn and mind situation reminds me so much of the khai and chingching situation!! in both cases, our "playboy" characters get kissed against their will and then get blamed and dumped for it. and in the end, they are the ones to apologize and continue to take that blame. this scene in my engineer rubbed me so wrong bc i am still chafing about it from theory of love!!

putting my thoughts under a read more bc it turned into 2k of bullshit. tw: consent and assault

i'm not a khai apologist okay, i get it. as much as i adore him now, the first handful of tol episodes were hard af for me to get over bc i just!!! wanted!!! to beat him up!!!! and let third go find a good boyfriend (and friend) who would appreciate him. but khai won me over with how obviously he was trying his best to change. i know some people maybe think that it was too sudden but imo it wasnt because a whole lot had just happened to make him want to be a better person:

he'd just had his world turned upside down from finding that video confession; he felt like he was losing third, who has been his stable best friend literally since their first few days at college, and he didnt understand why bc honestly in his own selfish stupid way he did that awful shit to try to save their friendship; he nearly died after a fight with third where third told him to leave him alone and his last thoughts were of third and how badly he'd fucked up. like he got into a major accident and walked back to third just to see him again. when he woke up, third was there but there was still such distance between them. and he hated it. all of those things happened to make him realize exactly how much he loved and valued third, and how badly he had treated third thruout their relationship.

so khai tries. he tries to be a better person, a better person for third. you know what old khai would have done upon meeting chingching? you best believe he would have been all over that. but instead he was polite and kind but distant to her. all he did was give her a ride to the faculty and not out right reject her when she auditioned. that was it. that was it! (honestly khai began to treat girls politely but distantly upon falling for and pursuing third. even jam on the beach, he was never rude or mean. polite and distant is his new way of dealing with people who may upset his relationship with third. he also treated milk this way when she showed up and harassed him at his apartment which i also have feelings about).

khai says he put himself in the situation to be kissed. but here is the situation: he went out with his friends. that's it? that is the situation. he went out with the sound crew (kind of reluctantly even), and was again polite and distant with chingching. he was happy and feeling good because he was making progress with the person he finally feels secure and loved with, he's changing the way he lives and treats people. he's happy.

and then he gets assaulted by a girl he has done nothing to encourage. then he tries to leave and finds third kissing another guy. and then third blames him for being assaulted (bc being kissed against your will is assault, and i'll get back to that with bohn), and then when he finally catches up to third, third throws a glass bottle at him, yells at him and, in the end, tells him he thinks khai is unable to love.

and of course third is allowed to feel this way about all of these things, but he is so ready to believe the worst of khai. he is absolutely ready and willing (to the point of getting upset with two for trying to convince him otherwise) that khai is the same khai that has hurt him time and time again. he has been hurt too much and he just cant stick his already sliced neck out again like that. which is valid and understandable! khai has hurt him! (and khai assaulted him too, which i could also get into. but khai kissing third against his will doesnt mean that chingching kissing him is in any way acceptable as some sort of karma imo).

what got me though was just how miserable and vulnerable khai was when he talks about this with third finally. of course third wouldnt believe him. of course he put himself in that situation. of course its hit fault that a girl kissed him bc he has a reputation. nevermind that all he did was go out with friends (and alongside his current love interest) and drink? is khai supposed to be on guard at all times now, just in case someone who knows he is a playboy decides they wanna forcibly lock lips with him against his will?

all of this is to say that i just wish third had told khai it wasnt his fault that he was kissed against his will. is it his fault that there is a severe lack of trust between them? absolutely. but khai is not responsible for chingching's bad actions. he was assaulted and blamed for it and felt like he couldnt say that because no one would believe him due to his reputation which just....reeks of real life parallels that i dont think the writers meant to stumble upon but sure did.

now onto bohn and mind.

khai and bohn being playboys is portrayed so very differently, which i think is why i'm a little more upset with duen than i am with third in this situation.

where the first like five episodes of tol took time to set khai up as a serious playboy, its only mentioned with bohn. bohn meets duen within the first handful of minutes if my eningeer and the rest is history. the closest we get to onscreen playboy behavior is *gasp* bohn going to a birthday party for a girl he doesnt particularly like but is willing to go along with to the point of buying her a present, holding her cake, and dragging his friends to an awkward and bad party. she is never seen nor mentioned again after leaving (lmao dont worry tho she is set up as a slut so u dont have to feel bad for her! haha love that thanks bl writers).

the rest of the episodes sets it up to show that bohn shows affection through acts of service and physical affection. he is awful at communication and will do bad things to get attention (bc he was a lonely rich kid who only got attention by doing these things i'm sure) from duen bc to bohn it seems like duen wont give him the time of day most of the time. duen rejects his primary love language (physical affection) but occasionally accepts his secondary (acts of service) (bohn giving him space to study, hunting down that specific book for him, doing those dumbass tasks that duen's friends came up with).

cut to the planting trip. so far, the series has set it up as bohn being as open as he is able to be about his feelings when both his ways of expressing himself are commonly rejected and/or misunderstood by duen. he's tried to have a couple real conversations but has been dismissed or ignored (which i'm sure duen didn't mean to do on purpose but also i am on bohn's side bc nobody else is and i seriously need his friends to step up!!!). he feels insecure in the relationship and like duen does not even like him, let alone care enough to be jealous.

we have also set up the fact that if someone comes onto bohn, duen will be upset with him. when mind is first introduced, its him cornering bohn in a bathroom and aggressively pressuring him into going out with him. bohn rejects him (not nearly as politely and distantly as khai has interacted with girls post-getting with third) but is still blamed by duen when "caught". this is used as a set up for why duen doesnt trust bohn, duen using the rumors of bohn's playboy lifestyle to explain to himself why bohn is bad news (nevermind that the only proof he has is his friends telling him rumors and the one bday party where bohn is bored and obviously more interested in fucking around with duen than anything or anyone else).

and then bohn is sexually assaulted in the woods. which he is only alone in becaus he was cooling down from a fight with duen. he feels insecure and disrespected and unheard, and then he gets stalked by a man who he knows doesnt respect boundaries and spooked (and i'm sure is disappointed it's not duen that came to find him). mind disrespects duen, which is what makes bohn really mad imo, and then forces a kiss on him. bohn has to struggle to push him off, and then only manages to get mind to leave him alone by threatening to hit him. (notice that he did not actually hit him, which would have been a valid and understandable response? bc bohn isnt really as tough as he appears i think).

bohn's first thought is not "i have just been assaulted, i would like support in this processing time." its "if i tell my boyfriend i was kissed, even tho it was against my will, he will be angry at me. i dont want him to be angry at me."

again, he does not even think duen likes him. duen doesnt show it at all in ways bohn can understand (i think duen's love language is gift giving but if bohn told him to give him the gifts i dont think bohn really understands that). he is already insecure in his relationship and he doesnt want to tell duen someone else came up and forced a kiss on him bc he is scared duen will blame him for it and be angry.

unfortunately?? he is right. while i really appreciated king's advice on not lying, i really wish it had been more along the lines of "you should tell duen what happened so he can support you alongside us, your friends. and if he does not support you, thats fucked up of him and we will support you even more."

i cant blame bohn for not telling duen. a) he is scared he will be blamed. b) if someone cornered me in the woods and kissed me against my will i'd be fucked up about it too! i also might want to keep it a secret! c) he may be feeling embarrassed and ashamed. he is a grown man who was just kissed by someone else and he couldnt stop it from happening. we already known bohn feels insecure in his manhood (he is insecure in a lot :( ) and i'm sure this wasnt like. the most stellar feeling in the world! he needed some time to process!!

the point is, bohn goes to tell duen what happened. and he doesnt even get to? he gets told that duen saw it (and i guess we can pretend that it didnt look like a full on fight if that's what duen wants to think bc of his own insecurities) and then gets dumped. so from bohn's pov he was like. assaulted in the woods, violently shoved his attacker away, and then finds out his boyfriend saw it and........didnt come to help?? pretended he didnt see it and talked to bohn normally when he found him??? literally tested him and then got upset about his lying??? didnt check in with bohn at all to see if he was okay?

and then in the end when they make up, its again bohn going through a task (this time hunting duen down at night in the woods) to apologize to duen instead of the other way around? bohn was not lying to duen bc he did something wrong and wanted to hide it. he was lying to duen bc he a) needed time to process what happened b) was scared of exactly what happened happening and c) didnt even think duen would care about him enough to be jealous.

this got so long and i'm so sorry to anyone who decided to read this whole thing oh man. i guess my final thoughts are that the reason i'm still dissatisfied with where bohnduen ended up this season is because i feel like bohn and khai were blamed for something that was in no way actually their faults. neither of them invited people they werent interested in to kiss him. neither of them deserved to be blamed for it. yes, it was just a kiss and some may feel like i'm overreacted but to me it isnt just a kiss. its that both of them were essentially sexually assaulted and neither felt like they would be believed if they said that they werent at fault (khai actually believed he was and i'd bet bohn thinks he should have been more careful too).

it just makes me sad bc i know it was never be addressed, it was used as a way to break trust for both couples but? it only highlighted that third and duen werent willing to trust, not that bohn and khai were actually untrustworthy in this regard!

[erhhyhyth-blog]

Market

Marketing Insight Guides Book 5 The Marketing Attitude M M Marcia Yudkin Author, 6 Steps to Free Publicity This complimentary copy of The Marketing Attitude is my way of thanking you for being a subscriber to my Marketing Minute newsletter. Other volumes in the series are: Persuading People to Buy Meatier Marketing Copy Strategic Marketing Publicity Tactics All five volumes in this series are available in these formats: Paperback Kindle Nook Audiobook If you enjoy this complimentary copy of The Marketing Attitude, I would be grateful if you would post a review, tweet or blog post online. Thank you! - Marcia Yudkin The Marketing Attitude Insights That Help You Build a Worthy Business The Marketing Attitude: Insights That Help You Build a Worthy Business Copyright © 2011 by Marcia Yudkin Publisher: Creative Ways Publishing PO Box 305 Goshen, MA 01032 www.marketinginsightguides.com All rights reserved, including the right to reproduce this book or portions thereof in any form or medium. For information on ob- taining reprint permission or arranging for bulk sales, please write to Creative Ways Publishing, PO Box 305, Goshen, MA 01032. Cover Design and Interior Design: Kitty Werner, RSBPress Cover Photo: © Silavsale/Fotalia.com Author Photo: Gila Yudkin ISBN 978-0-9716407-4-0 Printed in the United States of America The Marketing Attitude Insights That Help You Build a Worthy Business Marcia Yudkin Marketing Insight Guides Creative Ways Publishing Introduction Seven years into our relationship, my primary care doctor, who practices solo, asked me what I did for work. His immediate next question: “Marketing, what’s that?” “Marketing is everything you can do to make sure you are as busy here as you want to be,” I explained. “Oh, you mean advertising?” he asked. I steered the conversation back to the topic of my health, but I thought a lot afterward about his response. It’s a com- mon misconception that only advertising brings customers, clients–or patients–in the door. Networking, referrals, di- rect mail and media coverage also boost business. It’s even more common to overlook the subtler and sometimes intangible things that attract or repel customers, especially factors in the realm of attitude. Your demeanor, expectations, mindset and ethics profoundly influence what people do after interacting with you or the business environ- ment you’ve created. Introduction | v vI | THE MARKETING ATTITUDE How you speak, what you do over time, decisions you have made (or not made) and elements you focus on or ig- nore also have a significant impact on your business fortunes. In this book, you’ll find anecdotes, explanations, tips and reflections that help you understand the attitudes and ac- tions that can hold back success or nudge you toward a busi- ness that is as financially and psychologically rewarding as you dare to dream. The chapters in this book originate in a weekly column, The Marketing Minute, that I’ve published since 1998. You can sign up for a free email subscription at www.yudkin. com/markmin.htm. I always welcome marketing anecdotes from subscribers and suggestions for topics to cover. Contents Introduction v Part 1 | Basic Marketing Truths Acquire Poise 13 Opportunity Can Strike Anywhere The Power of Asking 17 Nothing Sells Itself 19 When You Stop Marketing 21 Profiting from Mistakes 23 Your Preferences Shouldn’t Rule Accepting Feedback is Hard 27 Patience, Patience, Part I 29 Patience, Patience, Part II 31 Delays Happen 33 The Familiarity Effect is Real 35 11 15 25 Part 2 | The Importance of Quality 37 Forget “Good Enough” 39 Setting a Standard 41 Why Quality? 43 Contents | vii vIII | THE MARKETING ATTITUDE Why Good Enough Stinks 45 Be a Good Client 47 Part 3 | You Vis-à-Vis Clients 49 Forget About Wanting Folks to Like You 51 Can You Please Everyone? 53 Serve, Don’t Be Subservient 55 Client Crises: Resolved or Rejected? 57 Respect Potential Employees, Too 59 Everyone Knows–Or Do They? 61 Pricing: Don’t Explain 63 Price Complaints? Here’s What to Do 65 Unwittingly, You Attract 67 Oh, You Do That? 69 Create Fans, Not Customers or Users 71 Cultivate True Fans 73 Part 4 | Find Your Own Best Path 75 Ignore Other People’s “Musts” 77 They Said I Had To 79 Personality Stereotypes in Marketing 81 Silent Like Cal? 83 Redefine Yourself–Why and How 85 What’s Your Business Philosophy? 87 Set the Right Tone 89 Understand Your Limits 91 Cheesy or Credible? Your Choice 93 Forget Other People’s Numbers 95 Part 5 | From Success to Greater Success 97 From Small Successes to Big Ones 101 Beware Misplaced Pride 103 Create a Dependable Pipeline 105 Are You In Front of Customers Enough? 107 Not Advertising? Think Again! 109 The Grapevine Speaks 111 Long-ago Connections Can Return 113 The Power of Intention 115 What a Standup Comedian Learned Become Unforgettable 119 Don’t Get Drained by Questions 121 Part 6 | My Own Business Lessons 117 123 25-Year Marketing Insights, Part I 125 25-Year Marketing Insights, Part II 127 25-Year Marketing Insights, Part III 129 25-Year Marketing Insights, Part Iv 131 What You Already Know 133 Time for “Thank You” 135 Part 7 | Recession-Proof Marketing 137 When Recession is in the Air 139 Don’t Let Customers Feel Neglected 141 Bob Bly’s Advice for the Last Recession 143 In a Recession, Reconnect 145 Before You Lower Prices 147 Recession? Don’t Run Scared 149 The Get-Clients-Next-Week Formula 151 Be Choosy, Even in a Recession 153 The MarketingCAotntitteundtes | ix x | THE MARKETING ATTITUDE Part 8 | Customer Service Matters 155 The Math of Satisfaction 157 Small Touches, Big Impact 159 Soliciting Useful Customer Feedback 161 Apologies That Defuse Disaster 163 Where’s the Start Button? 165 Worried About Bothering Customers? 167 No Parking? No Problem! 169 A Tale of Two Banks 171 Appreciative Gestures Work 173 Recommended Books 175 Get the Whole Series! 177 Index 179 About the Author 183 Part 1 Basic Marketing Truths Acquire Poise While listening to the introduction to Napoleon Hill’s 1928 masterwork, The Law of Success, I was struck by a word we don’t hear much in business discourse today. Hill promised his reader the ability to go through life with harmony and poise. Poise–it’s composure. Dignity. The ability to remain bal- anced and confident while being pulled at from this side and that. Someone with poise neither dominates nor gives in most of the time to the forces around them. If they have passion, they also have the willingness to wait until that passion meets the proper place and time for its expression. In marketing, poise comes from clarity of purpose, deep knowledge of cause and effect, and attunement to reality. Instead of frantic efforts, desperate enthusiasm, robotic copycatting, nasty bluster or greedy pressure on others, you Basic Marketing Truths | 13 14 | THE MARKETING ATTITUDE focus serenely on getting from where you are to where you want to go, making adjustments whenever necessary. You make your mark on the world with pleasure and grace, receiving respect and affection in return. Poise certainly gets my vote as a virtue in business.   “Kill the habit of worry, in all its forms, by reaching a gen- eral, blanket decision that nothing which life has to offer is worth the price of worry. With this decision will come poise, peace of mind, and calmness of thought which will bring happiness.” –Napoleon Hill Food for Thought Opportunity Can Strike Anywhere Do you divide your life into business and pleasure? Great self-promoters go by the slogan “You never know” and never close themselves off to opportunities. One woman was on an airplane and her seatmate wanted to know about her work. Instead of thinking, Geez, I’m on va- cation, the woman talked about her work–a book for handi- capped travelers that she had just published. Her seatmate turned out to be Abigail Van Buren, of “Dear Abby” fame, and a notice in Abby’s column brought the other woman sacks and sacks of orders for the book. Sam Yost, a music producer, was on his way up a ski lift in Sun Valley, Idaho, when the man next to him started a con- versation. He turned out to be an Arizona radio executive, and before they reached the mountaintop, he agreed to play Yost’s recordings on his stations. And Joann Stoutenburgh of Antelope, California, once got nervous when a man followed her car for several miles Basic Marketing Truths | 15 16 | THE MARKETING ATTITUDE and then pulled alongside to talk. He was a lawyer, desperate for a word processing person, and he’d noticed her vanity license plate, “TYPNG4U.” Aha! She was happy to oblige. Opportunity can knock any day of the week, anywhere. So heads up!   “Life loves to be taken by the lapel and told: ‘I’m with you, kid. Let’s go.’” –Maya Angelou Food for Thought The Power of Asking Ionce learned a valuable lesson from Tony, a silver-haired man who looks like the corporate executive he once was. At a conference where he, another man and I had been hired as speakers, Tony was staying on the VIP floor, with a free computer and fax in his room and free room-service break- fast. “I asked for a complimentary upgrade,” he explained. “I always do. I’ve been put in first class on planes too just for asking.” The other speaker and I, staying in ordinary rooms, sat with this, stunned. “Do you give a reason?” I asked. “Nope. You just ask as if you deserve it.” Mentally I started rehearsing the magic sentence, “Do you have a complimentary upgrade?,” knowing that I’d have to practice my way into it. It reminded me of another key sentence, “My fee is...,” which equally requires confidence. Basic Marketing Truths | 17 18 | THE MARKETING ATTITUDE After all, what’s the difference between the $70/hour and $700/hour consultant? Mostly, the latter asks–or simply tells. Daring to ask, and to ask convincingly: how scary and how utterly powerful.   “Wishing gains you nothing, but decisions can change everything.” –Alan Weiss Food for Thought Nothing Sells Itself What could be more lucrative than selling ice in the tropics? The attempt of twenty-three-year-old Mas- sachusetts entrepreneur Frederick Tudor to do that in 1806 holds a lesson for anyone who thinks that brilliant ideas sell themselves. The plan called for Tudor to secure a monopoly over the ice trade from the government of the Caribbean island Mar- tinique. Packed in sawdust, most of the ice did make it from New England to its destination intact. However, the venture ran aground because his advance team met with derision and disinterest. Even the actual ice, once it arrived, did not inspire sales. According to historian Diana Muir, “Ice has a long his- tory of luxury use in parts of the world where hot summers alternate with cold winters, or where wealthy cities nestle against snow-capped mountains.” But in the tropics, no one Basic Marketing Truths | 19 20 | THE MARKETING ATTITUDE had ever seen or heard of ice, and they did not feel any need for it. Tudor did finally establish an ice empire, becoming rich by transporting frozen water to warm places, after bouts of bankruptcy and spells in debtor’s prison. Creating the mar- ket took 20 years.   “Advertising is the fine art of making you think you have longed for something all your life that you never heard of before.” –Anonymous Food for Thought When You Stop Marketing AMarketing Minute subscriber told me that three years ago, his company took in more than a million dollars. This year he’s on track to earn one-fifth of that, if he’s lucky. What happened? He handed over responsibility for market- ing to an employee who didn’t think continuing to reach out to new, current and past clients was necessary. Two years ago, his company did no marketing. Coasting on referrals and repeat business, not till January of last year did he notice that orders were drying up. Come spring, the drought became dire. Frantically he’s now trying to make rain, but there are few clouds left to seed. Save this message to reread in case you think you’re doing so great that you can give up marketing. You may not feel the slowdown for a while, but you eventually will, in a dreadful, delayed effect. Basic Marketing Truths | 21 22 | THE MARKETING ATTITUDE The law of entropy applies to businesses as well as physi- cal objects: Anything in motion will eventually come to a rest unless given a boost. Marketing provides the energy enabling not just growth, but also maintenance of your success. Be wise! Food for Thought “Hell is a half-filled auditorium.”   –Robert Frost Profiting from Mistakes Remember “New Coke”–when the corporation decided people were tired of Coke’s traditional taste, changed the formula and consumers revolted? Because the alteration was pulled back within weeks in favor of “Coke Classic,” this episode usually gets cited as a whopping marketing failure. Sergio Zyman, the marketing guy then at the helm, says the campaign was a great success. His reasoning bears think- ing about. The purpose of changing the formula, he says, was to in- crease the attachment of the American public to Coca-Cola and sell more of it. Although no one foresaw the insurrection of Coca-Cola fans, their outcry and the quick reinstatement of the established flavor did deepen the bond between con- sumers and the brand. Sales shot up, reversing the trend of Coke losing market share to Pepsi. Basic Marketing Truths | 23 24 | THE MARKETING ATTITUDE Being able to learn a lesson like this is a hallmark of en- trepreneurial maturity, I believe. When results don’t turn out the way you expect, don’t whine, wail or hide your head. In- stead, consider what you now know not to do and how you can invest money and energy more wisely in the future.   On the Web Read an article on the six biggest mistakes people make in growing their businesses: www.marketingformore.com/mistakes.htm Your Preferences Shouldn’t Rule Two years ago, my dentist moved into a new office. Visu- ally, it sparkles. Auditorily, it flunks. Treatment rooms connect with one another, so patients hear drilling and con- versation in the next room. There’s no effort to create privacy, and no music playing for a soothing ambiance. For me, going there is so stressful that I am looking for a new practitioner. This dentist’s operation ignores sound as an ingredient of customer satisfaction. Apparently everyone working there has a visual orientation to the world and assumes the rest of the world resembles them. It’s common to overlook the need to provide for people with divergent perceptual preferences. Some people learn best through hands-on, in-person experiences, some by watching demonstrations or seeing diagrams and pictures and others by listening. Basic Marketing Truths | 25 26 | THE MARKETING ATTITUDE In developing products, offer options: the same content that some can read, others listen to and still others come to a seminar to master in person. Surprisingly, some custom- ers even buy the same content in more than one format. It’s comparable to people who watch the movie and then read the book, or vice versa.   “Never go to a doctor whose office plants have died.” –Erma Bombeck Food for Thought Accepting Feedback is Hard You’ve slaved over your product and your marketing copy–or over a blog post, position paper or proposal. Your audience–not just one person, but a chorus of four or five–offers a response that’s radically off the mark. One of two reactions is very common: Ø “Ouch!” You withdraw, lick your wounds and sulk. Ø “You’re wrong!” A vigorous counterattack ensues. Hard as this might be, don’t take the feedback as a per- sonal failure or evidence that people are hasty readers, sloppy thinkers or downright stupid. Instead, communication has failed. Communication has a sender and a receiver. Consider therefore that you are 50 percent responsible for the misfire. Take a deep breath and turn on your curiosity: Ø What did you say or do–or not say or do–that led to that impression? Basic Marketing Truths | 27 28 | THE MARKETING ATTITUDE Ø What can you change or add to help people receive your message as intended? If it’s too late to modify what went out, learn for next time. Getting upset or angry about feedback is natural. I’ve been there, too. Transcend that, though, and your marketing gets better and better.   “To swear off making mistakes is very easy. All you have to do is swear off having ideas.” –Leo Burnett Food for Thought Patience, Patience, Part I Keep working the plan even if you don’t notice immedi- ate results,” I’ve told several clients recently when deliv- ering their customized month-by-month, one-year market- ing plan. I’m taking my own advice now as I systematically implement my own marketing plan for increasing traffic to and sales from my web site. I’ll admit, it’s frustrating to work so hard and watch the numbers inch up, oh so gradually. Yet I stay focused because of something I read more than 20 years ago in a book called The Path of Least Resistance. The author, Robert Fritz, pointed out that when you initiate change and don’t notice any results, you’re tempted to give up just when the effect is beginning to take hold. The evidence of success has not had sufficient time to appear. Quitting is understandable, but unwise. Showman P.T. Barnum understood this. “If a man has not the pluck to keep on advertising,” he wrote, “all the money he had already spent is lost.” Basic Marketing Truths | 29 30 | THE MARKETING ATTITUDE Courage! Take the right actions and close your eyes to re- sults until the slow-acting, steadily improving consequences show up.   On the Web Read comments from Marketing Minute subscribers on the question of how long is reasonable to wait from results from marketing: www.yudkin.com/waiting.htm Patience, Patience, Part II How quickly did you learn about the loss of the Colum- bia space shuttle and its astronauts or of the collapse of the Twin Towers? Chances are, you knew the sad news within hours. In today’s fast-notification society, it’s natural to expect potential customers to make up their minds quickly and to conclude that a campaign failed when it didn’t produce re- sults on first try. According to Jay Lipe, author of The Mar- keting Toolkit for Growing Businesses, impatience derails too many marketers. “Ninety-nine percent of successful market- ing happens over the long haul,” he says. Lipe recounts one very non-instant sequence of interac- tions that resulted in new business. His firm sent out a direct mail piece, to which Prospect X responded. A face-to-face meeting took place. Lipe sent a proposal. Prospect X received nine issues of his newsletter. Prospect X visited Lipe’s web Basic Marketing Truths | 31 32 | THE MARKETING ATTITUDE site, then sent an email inquiry. A second face-to-face meet- ing took place, leading to a second proposal. Voilà! Prospect X became a client. Total time from the first contact to the sale: five years.   “Many of life’s failures are people who did not realize how close they were to success when they gave up.” –Thomas A. Edison Food for Thought Delays Happen Years ago, Arik Schenkler developed mathematical cross- word puzzles and tried to sell them to publications in Israel, where he lives. There were no takers. So he went on to other projects, eventually deleting his sample puzzles from his computer. Then he received a note from an editor saying he’d been impressed by the samples and wanted to run the puzzles in his magazine. Seven years had passed before Schenkler’s marketing ef- forts came to fruition. Back then, the man now contacting him had been im- pressed by the puzzles, but his boss at the newspaper where he was deputy editor didn’t care for them. Now, as managing editor of a magazine, he had the power to buy. In 1710, Bishop George Berkeley appealed to God’s all- seeing powers to explain how we know that objects don’t van- ish when we’re not looking at them. Today, business requires Basic Marketing Truths | 33 34 | THE MARKETING ATTITUDE a secular variety of faith that marketing may be working un- seen when no such evidence appears before us. Remember this example when you’re tempted to wail, “Nothing’s happening!” (And pray that results occur sooner than seven years.)   “If you’re walking down the right path and you’re willing to keep walking, eventually you’ll make progress.” –Barack Obama Food for Thought The Familiarity Effect is Real In a fascinating book called The Luck Factor, British psy- chologist Dr. Richard Wiseman sheds light on something shrewd marketers know: Generally, the more times someone has heard of or encountered you or your company, the more well-disposed they become toward you. Therefore marketers aim to become a familiar name. Wiseman reports a study in which people were shown a large number of meaningless squiggles and asked which they liked. Respondents preferred the squiggles they’d previously seen, without consciously remembering they’d already seen any of the squiggles or realizing the factor underlying their choice. “This familiarity effect is not limited to squiggles. With- out realizing it, we all prefer things we have seen before,” Wiseman comments. “It is part of the theory behind brand- ing and explains why companies are willing to spend millions Basic Marketing Truths | 35 36 | THE MARKETING ATTITUDE of dollars on advertising campaigns to keep their products in the public eye.” Don’t have a fortune to spend? You can still use this prin- ciple by understanding that ten exposures of your name and offerings have a greater impact on your target market than one. Never spend your whole marketing budget in one go.   On the Web Learn how to become ultra-familiar by turning yourself into the company’s highly visible hero: www.yudkin.com/hero.htm Part 2 The Importance of Quality Forget “Good Enough” As copywriter extraordinaire Gary Halbert once point- ed out, you don’t need to be twice as tall to see twice as far. “Just a few more inches will put your head above the rest of the mob,” he says. The same goes for your marketing materials. Tweaks for clarity here and there, a creative turn of phrase, fresh graph- ics and ordinary, sincere language instead of jargon can turn basic and banal into compelling and powerful. “I made a conscious decision to put enough money into my web site to make it ‘good enough,’” one client confided recently. The trouble is that “good enough” evokes no enthu- siasm and fails to provide reasons for someone to choose you rather than the alternatives. To put it plainly, “good enough” produces a lousy response. “Better” begins to make your efforts profitable. “Outstand- ing” still isn’t perfect, but gets you noticed, remembered, The Importance of Quality | 39 40 |THE MARKETING ATTITUDE recommended and revisited when the time comes for some- one to plunk down payment. Last week, two people became clients who remembered me from five years ago. Are you making that distinctive an impact?   On the Web Discover how to go beyond quality to offerings with ca- chet: www.yudkin.com/cachet.htm Setting a Standard When E.H. Harriman was expanding the Union Pa- cific Railroad at the start of the twentieth century, he insisted that one stretch of track be made as perfect as it could be. Then he held out that stretch of track as a model for the entire railroad system. While many people ridicule an ideal of perfection as a waste of time and energy, I don’t agree. By having high stan- dards and striving constantly to reach them, you become better at achieving a top level of quality in less time. This doesn’t happen when you stop with “good enough.” In my copywriting mentoring program, where I’m teach- ing marketing writing, I’ve watched proteges internalize my standards and improve week after week. It’s like what hap- pened when Winston Lord turned in a speech to Henry Kiss- inger at the US State Department. Kissinger asked, “Is this the best you can do?” The Importance of Quality | 41 42 |THE MARKETING ATTITUDE Lord said, “I guess not. I’ll try again.” The very same exchange reoccurred, until the ninth time Kissinger asked, “Is this your best effort?” Lord exploded, “I couldn’t possibly improve another word!” “Good. Now I’ll read it,” Kissinger replied.   “Whenever we come upon one of those intensely right words in a book or a newspaper, the resulting effect is physi- cal as well as spiritual, and electrically prompt.” –Mark Twain Food for Thought Why Quality? In an online discussion, I was surprised to see quite a few Internet marketers define “quality” as whatever gets cus- tomers to buy and keep a product. That sets the bar way too low. Set it higher, and you’re more likely to inspire devotion, referrals and long-term pa- tronage. I’d define “quality” as having a low annoyance factor and prompting delight in at least one relevant respect. Annoyances like spelling errors, poor organization, lousy layout, inconsistent facts or an abundance of “umms” rarely prompt returns or refund requests, but they register with us- ers and affect enthusiasm for an encore performance. Merely getting rid of all the annoyances gets you only to “ho-hum,” however. To achieve quality, try listing at least five kinds of excel- lence for your service, publication, event or merchandise. The Importance of Quality | 43 44 |THE MARKETING ATTITUDE Then honestly rate yourself–or have customers do so–along those dimensions. Or identify competitors who stand out in those respects and assess whether you can match or surpass them–or stake out a different reason for reverence. A dearth of quality causes indifference. Quality creates fans.   On the Web Read an article on how and why to create respect for quality throughout your organization: www.yudkin.com/everymarketer.htm Why Good Enough Stinks I’m so much more productive, now that I’ve learned to stop when I’ve achieved ‘good enough.’” Chances are, you’ve heard something like that and prob- ably nodded your head. Consider, though, this perspective from literary agent Jennifer Lawler in Writer’s Digest: “As an agent, I turn down ‘good enough’ ideas every day. The distance between ‘good enough’ and ‘great’ may not be huge, but if you go that extra 10 percent, I can tell. So can everyone else. ‘Great’ has me making lists of editors I should pitch as soon as you sign with me. ‘Good enough’... I’d rather eat ice cream.” In a down economy, in a competitive environment, on an Internet where short attention spans rule, “good enough” gets you passed over. Note that Lawler’s extra 10 percent isn’t exactitude of de- tail–so-called perfection. Rather, she means more developed, The Importance of Quality | 45 46 |THE MARKETING ATTITUDE more distinctive, more encompassing, coming from deeper within oneself and producing a stronger impact. Whether you sell plumbing or divorces, do you always give your work your best effort? People can tell, and they choose accordingly.   “There is always some kid who may be seeing me for the first time, and I owe him my best.” –Joe DiMaggio Food for Thought Be a Good Client Years ago, a motivational speaker told me he needed new web site copy, and after asking a lot of questions, I told him the fee would be $3,000. “I’ll pay you $3,500,” he said. “I want your best work.” I always deliver my highest quality work. But his gesture may have persuaded me to be sure to deliver my very best customer service as well. Besides raising the fee, you can become someone’s A-list client by: Ø Being as clear as possible in specifying what you want Ø Setting reasonable rather than unrealistic deadlines Ø Supplying the information or items they need to com- plete their project for you Ø Refraining from changing the scope of work mid- stream whenever possible Ø Saying “thank you” explicitly and often The Importance of Quality | 47 48 |THE MARKETING ATTITUDE Ø Providing honest feedback, both praise and construc- tive criticism Ø Paying on time or earlier Why bother? Treating your vendors well lowers your stress, raises the quality of your operations and may someday enable you to ask a favor so you can deliver out-of-the-park service to a client of yours.   “The price of anything is the amount of life you exchange for it.” –Henry David Thoreau Food for Thought Part 3 You Vis-à-Vis Clients Forget About Wanting Folks to Like You Do you want people to like you? This near-universal hu- man desire can hinder the growth of your business. According to Marketing Minute subscriber Steve Clark, a sales trainer and proprietor of NewSchoolSelling.com, people whose need to be liked outweighs their need to take money to the bank fear upsetting potential buyers. They waste time with prospects who will never buy, never ask fence-sitters to make up their minds, and accept “maybe” because they dread “no.” I’ve seen clients of mine drop promising opportunities out of fear of being perceived as a pest and delay raising pric- es to remain well-liked. To counteract such a tendency, Clark recommends iden- tifying self-sabotaging beliefs, like “It’s rude to ask someone about their budget” or “Follow-up is annoying.” Create and drill into yourself more constructive beliefs to replace them, You vis-à-vis Clients | 51 52 | THE MARKETING ATTITUDE like “Discussing money is enjoyable” and “Follow-up is a ser- vice to others.” “Selling is not a place to get your emotional needs met. It is simply an arena for conducting commerce. Becoming more detached can make you a 35 percent more effective salesperson,” Clark says.   “You can’t please everyone, and you can’t make everyone like you.” –Katie Couric Food for Thought Can You Please Everyone? Robert Mankoff, cartoon editor of The New Yorker, which he understandably calls “the best job in the world,” once set out to find a cartoon that nearly everyone who had any sense of humor would find funny. He sent what he thought was his own very best cartoon to 2,000 men and women, asking them to rate it from 1 (com- pletely unfunny) to 10 (extremely funny). About 80% rated Mankoff’s cartoon 7 or above, which delighted him. Yet some respondents gave it a 1. Mankoff threw up his hands, calling this item “the most highly rated cartoon for funniness that I ever did, or (sob) will probably ever do.” His survey has implications for your marketing efforts. Whatever target market you’re aiming at, its members differ from one another, having diverse personalities, vary- ing educational and cultural backgrounds, diverging tastes You vis-à-vis Clients | 53 54 | THE MARKETING ATTITUDE or lifestyles and disparate values. Therefore, they won’t all interpret what you present to them in the same way. It’s foolhardy to aim at universal praise or acceptance. So long as you have enthusiastic advocates, ignore those who think you’re incredibly off the mark.   “I don’t know what the key to success is, but the key to failure is trying to please everyone.” –Bill Cosby Food for Thought Serve, Don’t Be Subservient Over the years, I’ve mentored hundreds of people, first in writing for publication and more recently in writ- ing effective marketing materials. While much of the work focuses on improving technical skills, of equal importance– and lasting impact–are unexpected lessons in how to act like a masterful professional. Some mentorees assume that serving clients means be- ing subservient. They’re surprised to learn that as a consul- tant, you don’t have to accept the client’s definition of the problem. Indeed, fulfilling the client’s request may lead the client into a dead end. Instead, explain why they’d reach their goal faster by taking a different route. Likewise, just because the client’s paying you, you don’t have to kowtow by accepting fees below what your experi- ence merits or by putting up with nasty behavior. You vis-à-vis Clients | 55 56 | THE MARKETING ATTITUDE For some people I’ve coached, their crucial step forward involves learning to deliver their work so their clients accept their knowledge and advice. In a nutshell: Think before doing. And respect yourself as much as you respect others. The best clients respect you in turn for standing tall and telling them what’s what.   “No matter what your product is, you are ultimately in the education business. Your customers need to be con- stantly educated about the many advantages of doing busi- ness with you, trained to use your products more effectively, and taught how to make never-ending improvement in their lives.” –Robert G. Allen Food for Thought Client Crises: Resolved or Rejected? Do your clients have emergencies? Jack Mitchell, author of the marvelous book Hug Your Customers, describes scores of urgent problems solved by staff of his clothing stores: a groom spilling coffee on his pants on the way to his wedding, switched luggage leaving someone without a suit to wear to a funeral and a woman desperate to buy men’s underwear on a Sunday. (She’d packed her house for a move and her husband was furious that she’d forgotten to put aside clean briefs.) I read about Mitchell’s heroics while suffering through four days with muddy water at our house. The well company came on a Friday, seemed to have fixed the problem, then 20 minutes after the crew left, the water turned to mud again. They didn’t return my call till Monday morning. “If this happens again, can you give me a cell phone or beeper number where I can reach you?” I asked the company owner. You vis-à-vis Clients | 57 58 | THE MARKETING ATTITUDE His response, counseling patience, conveyed that to him, living without water was no big deal. And until competitors move in on his territory, perhaps he can remain top dog.   On the Web Read responses from Marketing Minute subscribers to the question of whether or not they cater to client emergen- cies: www.yudkin.com/emergencies.htm Respect Potential Employees, Too Do you treat prospective employees as well as you treat prospective buyers? Marketing Minute subscriber Mark Sherman, a copywriter in Lantana, Florida, says you should. Sherman interviewed for a marketing position with a well-known software company and was told he was one of two finalists. The company had a hiring freeze, though, and he should call back in two weeks to set up a second interview. Two weeks later, when he called, the HR director said the position had been filled. What about the hiring freeze? “Well, the position is filled, that’s all I can say.” Understandably, Sherman felt something fishy was going on and that he had not been dealt with honestly. And the in- cident had long-lasting repercussions when he shared his un- ease with fellow staffers for a popular online forum who had been recommending the company’s flagship product. The You vis-à-vis Clients | 59 60 | THE MARKETING ATTITUDE consensus was to remove the demo from the forum library and stop recommending the program. “Hundreds, maybe thousands, of prospective sales were lost,” Sherman reflects. Honesty and respect in all your dealings can have a ripple effect benefitting your company.   Many a man’s reputation would not know his character if they met on the street.” –Elbert Hubbard Food for Thought Everyone Knows–Or Do They? Last Saturday, I watched with pleasure a presentation for children that included musical instruments from around the world. As he concluded, the performer invited the audi- ence to come up and touch the instruments he’d brought. I asked about a long bamboo cylinder that produced the mes- merizing sound of a waterfall when tipped. “It’s a rain stick, from Chile,” the musician said. “I don’t bother to introduce it any more since so many nature stores carry them now. Everybody knows it.” Well, I hadn’t seen one, I thought, and I know a fair amount about music. And judging from their reactions, some of the kids present were encountering both his violin and rain stick for the first time. It’s tempting to assume that something you see or hear everywhere is equally familiar to everyone in your audience. You vis-à-vis Clients | 61 62 | THE MARKETING ATTITUDE This exchange reminded me of times I’d been baffled by sports and fashion brand references in business copy, or by names well-known to enthusiasts but not to every customer. In marketing, it’s best to bring the uninitiated along by unobtrusively explaining insider references.   On the Web Learn how to demystify jargon in your writing without offending those who are already in the know: www.yudkin.com/jargon.htm Pricing: Don’t Explain Why does Report A, with 292 pages, cost less than Re- port B with 129 pages?” “Why does your X service cost $997?” “How much time do you spend on Y for $2,295?” When you get questions like these, act like a sphinx. Smile. Change the subject. Not every customer question deserves an answer, and these demand to peek into the sanctum of your business, where you lock away your preferences, procedures and strat- egies. Those belong to you and you alone. In addition, such questioner curiosity shines attention on factors that you don’t want customers focusing on. As Mike Schultz and John Doerr put it in their Fees and Pricing Benchmark Report: Consulting Industry 2008: “The more the conversation focuses on the underlying compo- You vis-à-vis Clients | 63 64 | THE MARKETING ATTITUDE nents of the price and price structure, the less it focuses on value, quality and outcomes.” You want customers to care not how efficiently you work or what you pay contractors and employees, but how they benefit from what you do for them. Value, quality and outcomes: Keep their eyes on that trio!   On the Web Obtain a crash course in the psychology of pricing from my article, “Four Paradoxes of Pricing”: www.yudkin.com/pricing.htm Price Complaints? Here’s What to Do When potential buyers whine that your prices are too high–or seem to stay away for that reason–what should you do? Add value. Pile on extra benefits that cost you little and mean a lot to the recipient, such as: Ø More personal attention. Say you’ll answer their ques- tions, offer advice for no extra charge. (Maybe you al- ready do this, but they don’t know it!) Ø More affordability. Accept credit cards if you haven’t, start an extended payment plan, offer a pre-payment discount. Ø More speed. Stop dilly-dallying with orders, and de- liver service faster than they think they can expect. Ø More security. Strengthen your guarantee. This nudg- es many potential purchasers over the decision line. You vis-à-vis Clients | 65 66 | THE MARKETING ATTITUDE Ø More stuff. Toss in bonuses. Often you can get these from businesses complimentary to yours at no cost to you. Ø More duration. Lengthen the duration of each trans- action: free updates for a year, free six-month follow- up. Ø More convenience. Make house calls. Deliver when and where the customer wants it. Create standing or- ders. Ø More accessibility. Perhaps you already have people on staff who speak Portuguese or know sign language. Tell this to your market!   “Where quality is the thing sought after, the thing of su- preme quality is cheap, whatever the price one has to pay for it.” –William James Food for Thought Unwittingly, You Attract Acouple of decades ago, when I was a young college pro- fessor, a colleague flopped down next to me and com- plained. Students flocked to her office hours to beg for advice about their personal problems. I wondered about this, since students never dumped their problems on me. Surely some- thing about her behavior in class was inviting the response she didn’t like. This incident floated back in memory when someone I was coaching mentioned that most of her clients had a hard time deciding what they wanted from her. “I’ve had a few cli- ents like that over the years, but not many,” I replied. “Might you be encouraging that somehow?” She agreed with the principle that if you don’t like how customers relate to you, the first place to look is how you comport yourself toward them. You vis-à-vis Clients | 67 68 | THE MARKETING ATTITUDE Bothered by bargain hunters? You’re probably sending signals that it’s fine to try to dicker with you. Plagued by last- minute, gotta-be-done-tomorrow projects? Consider how you’re inviting crises. To paraphrase down-to-earth Eleanor Roosevelt, “No one can take advantage of you without your consent.”   On the Web Read an article describing ten copywriting techniques for warning away unsuitable clients and inviting ideal ones: www.yudkin.com/idealcustomers.htm Oh, You Do That? Yesterday at the copy shop I’ve patronized for seven years, I read a poster about the shop’s publishing program. I read it again, more carefully. “Adam, you’re printing books now?” I called to the man who was binding manuals for me. “In house?” “Since last year. On that.” He pointed to a machine be- hind him. “Would you quote me on a book order?” “Sure thing.” Driving home, I marveled at how hard it had been for me to make the connections needed to realize they could get the business I was about to give to a company in Tennessee. I knew the local shop was publishing books. I had paged through some on previous visits. It never occurred to me that they would own the expensive machinery needed for digi- You vis-à-vis Clients | 69 70 | THE MARKETING ATTITUDE tal book printing. Their poster talked about publishing, not printing. I practically had to be hit on the head to get it. They should have told me–explicitly–either personally (they know I’m an author) or through a newsletter (they don’t have one). Don’t let loyal customers wander around oblivious to your capabilities.   “Early to bed, early to rise, advertise, advertise, advertise.” –Ray Kroc Food for Thought Create Fans, Not Customers or Users Have you been trying to attract clients and increase buy- ers of your products and services? Don’t, says Market- ing Minute subscriber Bob Baker, author of Branding Yourself Online. “I used to describe people who complimented my articles and books as ‘happy readers,’ or if they purchased something, ‘satisfied customers.’ Others talk about ‘users.’ ‘Fans,’ on the other hand, cheer you on, rave about you to their friends, fol- low everything you do with interest, go to great lengths to attend your public appearances, and more. Which would you rather have?” Although “fan club” usually connotes glamorous fields like entertainment and sports, Baker argues that angling for fans encourages anyone to develop some distinctive quality that in turn increases memorableness, repeat sales and refer- rals. You vis-à-vis Clients | 71 72 | THE MARKETING ATTITUDE Your distinctive quality might be an unusual point of view, a unique personality, an impressive background, re- markable connections, spiritual depth, or something else competitors lack. Your marketing and publicity materials then play up that quality along with all the more usual information. With a clear, appealing brand identity, you’ll have taken the first step to generating a crowd of clamoring fans.   On the Web Read my article on marketing tools that turn first-time contacts into long-term fans: www.yudkin.com/fans.htm Cultivate True Fans In March 2008, Kevin Kelly published a provocative piece suggesting that artists can make a decent living by attract- ing 1,000 “true fans.” A true fan purchases everything you produce, drives 200 miles to see you sing, comes to your openings, has a Google Alert set for your name, buys your out-of-print stuff on eBay. They can’t wait for your next work, and they spend $100 a year with you–for you, that’s $100,000 a year. Bloggers have quibbled with his math and attacked his assumptions, but Kelly’s idea of going for depth of apprecia- tion has validity far beyond art and music. How? Ø Nourish long-term relationships. One year-after-year customer has more value than four fickle ones. Ø Be responsive. Marketing Minute subscribers express surprise when I reply to their emails. You deserve it! You vis-à-vis Clients | 73 74 | THE MARKETING ATTITUDE Ø Be different. No one has intense loyalty for a “me too” product, company, person or service. Ø Show up often. Fans won’t forget you when they run across your name continually. Ø Be authentic, personal and consistent. Fakery and wobbling repel fans. Personality cements the bond.   “Always be a first-rate version of yourself, and not a sec- ond-rate version of someone else.” –Judy Garland Food for Thought Part 4 Find Your Own Best Path Ignore Other People’s “Musts” Has some know-it-all ever told you, you must do la-de- da to get work? You must have an up-to-date résumé or brochure. You must call friends of friends to network. You must... Some- times these general “musts” set you up for failure. If these “musts” don’t fit your personality and your past success pattern, you may not execute them well–or get around to them at all. My friend Kathleen has gotten hired for numerous jobs by walking into a certain office upon a signal from her intu- ition. No “Help Wanted” ad or sign, and no résumé on her part. Just being at the right place at the perfect time. A computer programmer friend gets the nod when he has a chance not just to talk but to demonstrate what he can do. He needs to engineer these kinds of opportunities, not talky interviews, to move around in the work world. Find Your Own Best Path | 77 78 | THE MARKETING ATTITUDE Once a business partner insisted I had to make cold calls to drum up clients. Wrong, wrong, wrong! Do it your way when that’s worked for you before.   “I have to change a tune to my own way of doing it. That’s all I know.” –Billie Holiday Food for Thought They Said I Had To But you have to make cold calls,’ they told me. I believed them, reluctantly, since they were the experts.” Over the years, numerous clients have told me this sad tale. Cold calls, properly made, are powerful, and one of my favorite books, The Well-Fed Writer, describes how Peter Bowerman used them to launch a business communications practice despite having no experience and no connections. But cold calls are not necessary to build a business. Through publishing, publicity, public speaking and network- ing, you can build a reputation that attracts business without you ever telephoning a stranger. Likewise, web sites are powerful business attraction tools. Yet you can certainly have a thriving business without a web site. My favorite local restaurant keeps its tables full without one. Find Your Own Best Path | 79 80 | THE MARKETING ATTITUDE Are any marketing activities or paraphernalia mandato- ry? Maybe a telephone. Maybe an email address. Maybe just one or the other. In deciding how to market yourself, clear your mind of “musts.” Come up with a fresh plan that suits both the ex- pectations of your target market and your own preferences.   “Re-examine all that you have been told; dismiss that which insults your soul.” –Walt Whitman Food for Thought Personality Stereotypes in Marketing Abusiness contact with whom I’d become acquainted by email and then by phone once sent me this candid comment: “Over the phone, you seem somewhat introverted. You must do some kind of Clark Kent/Superman thing when you give a talk if all of those testimonials are true.” Indeed, I do flip some sort of switch when I teach a tele- class, lead an in-person seminar or perform on radio. I’ve been known to flip the switch with clients, too. But the “in- troverted” comment reflects a popular misconception that certain personality types do better in certain media. In fact, many radio stars, like Garrison Keillor, and acclaimed actors, like Laurence Olivier, consider themselves shy. Because while growing up I was the quiet one in my fam- ily, not until my mid-30’s did I have an inkling that I could hold the attention of an audience, and enjoy it. With prac- tice, I’ve developed and polished my presentation skills. Re- Find Your Own Best Path | 81 82 | THE MARKETING ATTITUDE cently several people have told me they envied my “natural” speaking talent. Don’t allow personality stereotypes to keep you from ex- ploring any method of marketing.   On the Web Download my free audio manifesto on marketing for in- troverts: www.yudkin.com/introverts.htm Silent Like Cal? Last month marked the one-hundredth anniversary of Calvin Coolidge becoming mayor of Northampton, Massachusetts, two towns over from me. This got me read- ing up on America’s thirtieth president, who comes to us through the fog of history as “Silent Cal.” This taciturn man, I learned, was actually a distinguished communicator. The first US president to give a political speech on the radio, he held more press conferences than any president before him or since. Most Americans liked him and considered him principled and competent. His nickname points to a paradox that remains surpris- ing in today’s society: Someone deeply introverted can shine on stage, on the air and on paper, can persuade and even be popular. Though Coolidge became president upon the death of Warren G. Harding, voters elected him to a term after that. Contrary to stereotypes, introverts can excel at market- ing–in business as well as in politics. Find Your Own Best Path | 83 84 | THE MARKETING ATTITUDE A quieter style can be strong, creative, empathetic and alluring. Too often, though, introverts swallow the myth that they compare poorly with chatterboxes when it comes to bringing in business.   On the Web Read about four ways that introverts can magnetically at- tract admiration and followers: www.yudkin.com/in-charisma.htm Redefine Yourself–Why and How Alament I often hear: “The market is starting to regard what I do as a commodity, driving down fees.” However, by presenting you (or your firm) as offering something unique, not some same old thing, you come across as deserving premium pay. First, articulate what makes you different from others with the same title or those performing the same services– “executive coach,” “human resources consultant” or “virtual assistant,” for instance. Think: Who would be a perfect client for you who would not suit most competitors? Or try filling in these blanks: “I specialize in helping ___ (who?) who have ___ (what prob- lem?) get ___ (what result?).” Second, toss away or greatly downplay the title you previ- ously used and come forth with your uniqueness. Then you’re no longer a commodity. Find Your Own Best Path | 85 86 | THE MARKETING ATTITUDE BEFORE: Executive recruiter AFTER: We specialize in helping rapidly growing entre- preneurial companies find their first professional CEO. BEFORE: Virtual assistant AFTER: We turn “to-do’s” to “done’s” for overburdened moms. BEFORE: Used car salesman AFTER: Using matchmaking psychology, we find your next favorite car.   “If what you are selling is energy, charisma, and enthusi- asm, there is no competition, because most others are selling things that are lifeless, loveless, and dull.” –Stuart Wilde Food for Thought What’s Your Business Philosophy? My company helps people in distress save their homes before they lose them via auctions to sharks,” wrote a guy named Ike Okwuosa from San Francisco, introducing himself. “I operate under the abiding business ethos that a mutually beneficial solution for all concerned is a win-win deal, and every human interaction, no matter how innocu- ous, is a holy encounter. This way of thinking is reflected in my company position statement, ‘Because People Are More Important Than Property.’” Sincerity came through loudly and clearly in this state- ment. It got me wondering how many other people express a personal calling, a spiritual philosophy in their work. Later in our correspondence, Okwuosa asked me a ques- tion I couldn’t answer at first: “How about you, Marcia–what is your business philosophy?” Find Your Own Best Path | 87 88 | THE MARKETING ATTITUDE After thinking and thinking, I came up with two prin- ciples I hold dear: Integrity always matters, and excellence is worth pursuing for its own sake. These values have gov- erned my life for more than 30 years. Yet I’ve rarely put them into words and never used them in marketing. They’re simply who I am.   On the Web Read responses from more than 30 Marketing Minute subscribers on the question of their business philosophy: www.yudkin.com/philosophy.htm Set the Right Tone Gosh, you certainly don’t sound like a stressed-out aca- demic” is a typical opener I hear on voicemail messages from friends who are college professors. “You sound so up- beat,” marvel friends who call me. So much is conveyed in the way someone answers the phone, and I’ve adopted the habit of using a cheerfully ener- getic tone of voice. Someone who calls me in a depressed or angry mood isn’t quite as lugubrious or upset after such a greeting, and some- one who doesn’t know what to expect from me may begin to feel rapport building even before we’ve started the substan- tive part of our conversation. Other communication elements besides your telephone voice set a tone. Photos: Do you smile in yours, frown or look off into the distance, aloof? Find Your Own Best Path | 89 90 | THE MARKETING ATTITUDE Prose style: Is your web site jammed with jargon or does it talk accessibly to the reader? Reception area: Does your office waiting area offer com- fortable seating with up-to-date, appropriate reading mate- rial? First impressions last, and they begin sooner than you might think.   “Personality is the glitter that sends your little gleam across the footlights and the orchestra pit into that big black space where the audience is.” –Mae West Food for Thought Understand Your Limits AMarketing Minute subscriber asks: “When is it time to cut loose a difficult customer instead of trying to improve communication?” View difficult customers as a mismatch between your expectations and theirs, what you’re prepared to deliver and what they want, or your personality and their needs. Customers who try your patience, for example, aren’t horrible in themselves. For someone who loves extended in- teractions, they might be perfect. The issue then becomes: How willing and able are you to stretch for someone with different needs, expectations or habits than what you’d prefer? Sometimes attention to your communication skills re- solves the problem. Then you become able to help a wider range of people. Other times, it’s not cost-effective for you to contort to what they want. Find Your Own Best Path | 91 92 | THE MARKETING ATTITUDE Or accommodating them is too stressful or unpleasant for you. And perhaps you simply can’t–psychologically or practi- cally–satisfy them. In the last three instances, you might be better off to cut them loose. Prevent such headachy mismatches by describing your work process in such a way that ideal customers say “Yes!” and unsuitable ones go elsewhere.   “If you want to catch a trout, don’t fish in a herring bar- rel.” –Ann Landers Food for Thought Cheesy or Credible? Your Choice In one week, two clients voiced the same worry to me: “I don’t want to be cheesy.” One added, “I provide a high- quality service.” My dictionary defines “cheesy” as “tasteless and showy, often in a vulgar manner; cheap, shoddy.” According to Molly Gordon, author of Authentic Promo- tion, you can find important values in such concerns and then turn them into commitments. Like this: Complaint: Marketing takes too much time. Underlying Value: Balance, efficiency. Commitment: I am committed to efficient and effective use of my time. Complaint: Marketing costs too much. Underlying Value: Frugality, wise use of resources. Commitment: I am committed to making wise market- ing investments. Find Your Own Best Path | 93 94 | THE MARKETING ATTITUDE Underlying the “cheesy” fear might be respect for sub- stance over image, in contrast to the image over substance that pervades the media around us, Gordon suggests. “Mar- keting can be about sharing your enthusiasm and being avail- able to those who want what you have to offer. Try sharing your energy, excitement and ideas without feeling attached to whether or not someone hires you.” That way, your message clicks with your ideal clients– tastefully.   On the Web Learn how to become not only credible to potential cli- ents but also believable: www.yudkin.com/believability.htm Forget Other People’s Numbers We Americans have too much faith in numbers. The other day a client informed me that the av- erage response rate to offers on postcards was 4 to 6 percent. It reminded me of advice I’d once read on getting published. The Rule of Twelve, this author called it: Send out twelve book proposals and one will be accepted. There are similar statistics floating around about how many résumés you must send out to get one interview, and how many interviews pro- duce each job offer. If these numbers encourage you to try harder, terrific. But please understand, such numbers have the solidity of air. They do not come from research. And they have no power to predict how quickly your marketing campaign will succeed. If you create a perfect match, averages mean nothing. If you can write a project proposal that sparkles and per- suades, averages don’t apply. If you can keep trying after 200 Find Your Own Best Path | 95 96 | THE MARKETING ATTITUDE rejections, and succeed on try #201, who cares what other people’s numbers were? Not averages but creativity and persistence get you where you want to go.   “Not everything that can be counted counts, and not ev- erything that counts can be counted.” –Albert Einstein Food for Thought Part 5 From Success to Greater Success From Success to Greater Success | 99 Always Alert, Always Learning During the season of going back to school, I thought I’d provide a few suggestions for free, on-your-own mar- keting education. First, just becoming conscious of your reactions to the scores of marketing messages you encounter every day can teach you a lot. Which envelopes, letters, ads, newsletters and non-news stories in the news grab your attention, and which ones make you roll your eyes? With any “don’t” you discover, try turning it upside-down into a “do.” For example, recoil- ing from a brochure with an unfriendly, off-putting photo reminds you that your photo should be friendly and inviting. Second, discuss the best and worst that you find with business colleagues. When the headline you loved leaves someone else confused, and the design you hated doesn’t stop them from copying down the phone number to place an order, you’ve learned something valuable. Other times some- 100 | THE MARKETING ATTITUDE one else will be able to identify in words the aspect of a piece that disturbed you. Third, think about how you can borrow the techniques used successfully by others for your own business. For in- stance, I’m constantly hearing from readers inspired by The Marketing Minute to start their own email newsletter.   “You cannot teach a man anything; you can only help him find it within himself.” –Galileo Food for Thought From Success to Greater Success | 101 From Small Successes to Big Ones Susan RoAne, author of How to Work a Room, calls it the “Go Know!” theory of marketing: “One day my Aunt Yet- ta is standing next to someone somewhere who just happens to..., which leads to...” Marketing Minute subscriber Diane Darling has a sto- ry like this. Every couple of months she would send out an email newsletter containing tips on better networking to a growing list of more than 1,000 subscribers. In May 2001, she announced an upcoming seminar on networking in the newsletter. Fifty participants attended, among them a woman who was later asked by a Wall Street Journal reporter about the role of networking in a job search and mentioned Darling. Journal reporter Joann Lubin attended Darling’s next semi- nar and described it in vivid detail in an article. NBC Nightly News called after seeing Lubin’s article and filmed a networking session led by Darling that night. A 102 | THE MARKETING ATTITUDE month later, that segment aired. McGraw-Hill called: Would she be interested in writing a book? The Networking Survival Guide by Diane Darling came out in April 2003. Aesop might put it this way: Large achievements from small actions grow.   “Luck to me is something else: Hard work–and realizing what is opportunity and what isn’t.” –Lucille Ball Food for Thought From Success to Greater Success | 103 Beware Misplaced Pride Are you proud to say you get 90 percent of your new cli- ents by referral? That does indicate people trust you, but it should also send up a warning flag: Your business may be shaky, just six months or a year from collapse. Too many times to count, people have come to me who used to get all their business through personal connections. Until it was too late, they didn’t notice referrals were drying up. Their industry had changed, their contacts had mainly moved on or younger folks became in charge. Because they’d had such steady, dependable referrals, marketing was a cloud of mystery to them. They suddenly had to learn the basics, as if they had just hung out a shingle. How to avoid their peril? Create a reputation that extends beyond those who personally know you. Publish. Speak. Pursue publicity. Be known for a specific expertise or point of view. Get to know influential people by 104 | THE MARKETING ATTITUDE commenting on their blogs. Offer resources on your web site that strangers want to link to. Don’t wait. Get going on building that reputation now.   “Begin somewhere; you cannot build a reputation on what you intend to do.” –Liz Smith Food for Thought From Success to Greater Success | 105 Create a Dependable Pipeline Is your pipeline in tiptop shape? If yes, you dependably experience a steady stream of inquiries from potential clients or customers, with little ef- fort or attention. If no, consider one or more of these measures, thereby creating a marketing infrastructure that continually delivers leads: Ø Regular direct mail outreach. Each month, a mailing list company ships a local printer labels for newly in- corporated or newly registered businesses in his area. Sending them a special offer for printed stationery yields a couple dozen new faces in his shop a month, some becoming long-term customers. Ø Periodic seminars. For years, terrific leads came my way through several adult education programs where I taught every other month or so. After preparing 106 | THE MARKETING ATTITUDE once, I merely had to show up and perform well–and I even got paid a small amount to collect these leads. Ø Recurrent publishing. A blog, a column that you write every week or month or your own email newsletter will normally bring you inquiries like clockwork, too. Make marketing regular so you won’t suffer dry spells.   “Repetition makes reputation and reputation makes cus- tomers.” –Elizabeth Arden Food for Thought From Success to Greater Success | 107 Are You In Front of Customers Enough? How often is too often to contact customers? This question comes up at many of my seminars. Interestingly, I rarely hear it asked in a positive way: How often should we be contacting customers? In truth, hardly anyone contacts their customers too often. And hardly anyone contacts customers as often as is most profitable. Denise Lones, founder of The Lones Group, says that of 27,000 real estate agents she has asked over the years to add her to their database for marketing mailings, only five send her stuff more than four times a year. “And most of what they send is generic and boring,” she adds. Repetitive contact maximizes the odds that when the customer is ready to buy, you’re the one who gets the busi- ness. Educate customers on a variety of issues and you build credibility. Sprinkle in some creativity so that readers enjoy 108 | THE MARKETING ATTITUDE hearing from you, vary your offers, and you’ve got a scrump- tious recipe for revenue. Contact might be by mail, email or advertising on radio, in print and so on. Stay in sight, in mind–and solidly in the black.   On the Web Download a free recording in which I interview the own- er of a postcard marketing company on ways to use post- cards to get and stay in front of customers: www.yudkin.com/postcards.htm From Success to Greater Success | 109 Not Advertising? Think Again! Moving to a town of 920 people changed my perspec- tive on advertising. The phone company wouldn’t send us the Yellow Pages for three weeks, so I read ads in the local paper as if they held clues to buried treasure. When the phone directory finally arrived, it didn’t answer all our needs, since many tradespeople and personal service providers in the area don’t spring for a business phone and therefore aren’t listed. Even now that we’ve figured out where to shop or who to call for most of what we need, we occasion- ally get stumped, and asking around for referrals or search- ing on the web doesn’t work, either. When local businesses decide they can’t afford or are getting along fine without advertising, they don’t give even a passing thought to the folks who are urgently trying to find someone like them. National companies have their blind 110 | THE MARKETING ATTITUDE spots too, like skipping Yellow Pages in outlying areas and distributing glossy circulars that don’t mention locations. If you don’t advertise, you’re missing perfect customers who are making do, going without or tearing out their hair. It’s inconsiderate and shortsighted!   “Put yourself in the path of a charging stampede of peo- ple who are desperate to buy what you are selling.” –Ben Hart Food for Thought From Success to Greater Success | 111 The Grapevine Speaks According to Northeastern University professor Walter Carl, when college students keep track of how many times any brand, organization, product or service spontane- ously comes up in conversation, the average tally comes to 25 times a day. You can improve the odds that your company or brand gets talked about. Zipcar, a car-sharing service, gives each customer a col- orful card to keep on their key chain. What tangible item can you give away that will be seen–and asked about–by others? When professional speaker Patricia Fripp is at home watching TV, she signs stacks of “Thank you” cards so that every shipment from her office can include a hand-signed note. What personal touch can you add to your operations so buyers feel special? Post-it Notes became a runaway success only when they were put directly into the hands of secretaries, who quickly 112 | THE MARKETING ATTITUDE couldn’t live without them and spread the word. How can you get your product to influential users who will tell their networks about your stuff? When making a purchase, nearly 80 percent of people rely on recommendations, which you can encourage.   On the Web Find out how to form bonds with people who are often in a position to recommend you and your company: www.yudkin.com/influence.htm From Success to Greater Success | 113 Long-ago Connections Can Return Legendary advertising executive John Caples tells the sto- ry of a man who walked into a Steinway showroom to buy “the instrument of the immortals” 10 years after he first saw Steinway’s ad with that phrase. Only then was he in the position to buy the piano the ad had made him want. I experienced a similar demonstration of the long-term impact of marketing recently. In 1991, to promote our book Smart Speaking, my co-author Laurie Schloff and I appeared on a Boston radio show. Eight years later, the host of that show called me to say she was now launching a business show on WBNW Personal Finance Radio. Would I like to be a featured expert on her program? I became a Monday morning regular on the show, talk- ing about marketing. She would never have remembered me, much less known about my current interests, had I not put 114 | THE MARKETING ATTITUDE her on my mailing list and sent three postcards a year to her home. With every bit of marketing you do, you plant seeds. Keep them watered so that they can sprout and bloom when their time comes.   “The person who is waiting for something to turn up might start with their shirt sleeves.” –Garth Henrichs Food for Thought From Success to Greater Success | 115 The Power of Intention Do you believe that rustling up clients is hard work, or do you feel that they are waiting for you everywhere? Often, life brings you exactly what you expect. Here’s a story told by coach Zev Saftlas in his book, Motivation That Works. When his brother Ira got called for jury duty, he de- cided that one of the several hundred strangers he was sitting around with was undoubtedly a perfect client for his adver- tising agency. Ira relaxed in the waiting room until he got an idea who the potential client might be. After going over to start a con- versation, he learned that the man owned several businesses and did indeed need advertising services. “The rest fell into place by itself,” writes Saftlas. “All he did was set a goal.” Coach Andrea Conway puts it this way: “You have to ‘have it’ on the inside before you can ‘get it’ on the outside. The more you identify with struggle, the more struggle you 116 | THE MARKETING ATTITUDE attract to yourself. Instead, when you reach a place of inner security, knowing that potential buyers are asking for your offering, you can really soar.”   “By the act of observation and intention, we have the abil- ity to extend a kind of super-radiance to the world.” –Lynne McTaggart Food for Thought From Success to Greater Success | 117 What a Standup Comedian Learned During a cross-country call with copywriter and mar- keter Tony Blake, I couldn’t help pelting him with questions when I learned his first career was standup comic. How did he get from there to a career similar to mine? What had he learned from entertaining crowds in comedy clubs that applies to wooing customers? “As I traveled the comedy circuit, I saw that some clubs thrived while others were failing because they weren’t mar- keting themselves properly,” Blake told me. “I told club own- ers that I would do my standup gig at night while spending days coaching them on what was working elsewhere. Other comics asked for my help too, and before long I was doing much more advice giving than performing.” Blake added that one can’t succeed as a comedian with- out becoming an astute observer and amateur psycholo- gist, listening closely so one can shine the light of humor on 118 | THE MARKETING ATTITUDE human behavior. “You learn to think on your feet, and you become familiar with failure. If the audience doesn’t laugh, you simply move on to the next gag–and any successful mar- keter does the same.”   “Advice is like snow; the softer it falls, the longer it dwells upon, and the deeper it sinks into, the mind.” –Samuel Taylor Coleridge Food for Thought From Success to Greater Success | 119 Become Unforgettable Cowgirl Smarts: It doesn’t sound like a serious business topic, and perhaps that’s why meeting planners and audiences have been cheering wildly since Texan Ellen Reid Smith, author of a book called e-Loyalty, began giving talks wearing black leather chaps and an outsized Stetson. “I walk out on stage to a room of smiling, whooping at- tendees,” Smith says. “We start off the hour with everyone giving their best ‘Yeehaw!’ It breaks down all formality and gets their energy flowing.” Smith’s web site CowgirlSmarts.com continues the theme with historical lore, a series of books on the cowgirl approach to business and a period photo of one of her cowgirl heroes. “Before signing the contract, some clients ask ‘Now you’re going to wear your chaps, aren’t you?’ I’d been speaking to groups on e-loyalty for years, and I wish I’d done something like this sooner. Showing up in costume makes me more 120 | THE MARKETING ATTITUDE desirable as a speaker, more memorable and definitely more fun. I’ll still drag out my silk suits for the right market, but I prefer boots and attitude.”   On the Web Read my article on how and why to create a personal trademark: www.yudkin.com/trademark.htm From Success to Greater Success | 121 Don’t Get Drained by Questions Experts and consultants often find themselves perplexed on how to handle topical questions too big for a one- sentence answer but too small for a paid consultation. My colleague Joan Stewart channels some “How can I...?” publicity questions by inviting readers of her weekly ezine to post suggestions for the questioner at her Publicity Hound blog. “This lets my subscribers flaunt their expertise by pro- viding creative ideas and helpful suggestions–far more than I could offer by myself,” she says. Others have occasional call-in times, where anyone who gets through between, say, 1 and 2 p.m. gets up to 10 minutes of complimentary advice. You could also respond, “Thank you for your question. It’s queued up for a possible answer in my monthly newslet- ter. Make sure you subscribe at...” 122 | THE MARKETING ATTITUDE Another option: Answer questions by email, then com- pile the Q&A’s into a freebie report, a product or a Frequently Asked Questions page. I’ve seen specialists offering a low-cost pay-per-question service. My own solution is occasional “Ask Marcia” teleseminars, which I make available afterwards in recorded form. Somehow, leverage those questions!   On the Web Download my free Q&A recording on getting media cov- erage: www.yudkin.com/publicityideas.htm Part 6 My Own Business Lessons 25-Year Marketing Insights, Part I In January 2006, I celebrated my 25th anniversary of suc- cessful self-employment. Looking back, I identified four lessons learned to share with you. Lesson #1: Your first big success contains clues to a dy- namic that comes easily to you. Figure out how to harness that strength, give it a good run on a regular basis and you’ll experience a champion series of successes. On January 4, 1981, my first published article appeared in the Sunday New York Times. One tantalizing sentence in my query letter to them two months before had opened that door of opportunity: “In January, I will be retiring from col- lege teaching at the age of 28 and want to write about what it has been like to be a professor, compared with the way I saw professors when I was a student.” With that sentence, I promised an out-of-the-ordinary story skillfully told. This they wanted. My Own Business Lessons | 125 126 | THE MARKETING ATTITUDE For me, words have opened doors over and over again. I’d be loony to forget this. For others, impulsive calls or old connections sparked their first and later successes. Repeat what worked!   “Don’t measure yourself by what you have accomplished, but by what you should have accomplished with your ability.” –John Wooden Food for Thought 25-Year Marketing Insights, Part II Lesson #2 learned from looking back at 25 years of suc- cessful self-employment: Customer comments can con- tain pure gold. Many of my most in-demand services came about from a suggestion made by someone who wanted to do business with me. Ø A decade ago, someone emailed, “I want to learn how to be you. Can you teach me?” I emailed back, “What do you mean?” We worked out a tutorial program through which I passed on my marketing consulting skills. With periodic updates, that training program has proved a consistent seller. Ø Years before that, a Harvard professor called and said he couldn’t make my seminar. Could I present it to him at his office, privately? I met with him weekly and gradually realized what I was doing for him had My Own Business Lessons | 127 128 | THE MARKETING ATTITUDE a name: consulting. Undoubtedly others would want that too, I guessed, correctly. Ø When I started teaching seminars, the topics I knew the most about were already taken. The director of the Cambridge Center for Adult Education suggested “So You Want to Write a Book,” a class that went on to generate long waiting lists year after year.   “We are not doing the customer a favor by serving him. He is doing us a favor by giving us an opportunity to do so” –Mahatma Gandhi Food for Thought 25-Year Marketing Insights, Part III Lesson #3 from 25 years of being in business: Important strengths are not always obvious. While I knew from the get-go that I had a knack for the written word, I had several misconceptions or blind spots that it took years to overcome. Ø I believed I couldn’t captivate an audience. In my family, I was the quiet one, the bookworm. To me, good speakers were extroverts like my uncle, known for storytelling and oratory. I taught reasonably well, though, and with practice, eventually shone as a speaker and radio performer. Ø I also assumed I couldn’t sell. I briefly had a business partner who excelled at schmoozing, but my semi- nars and referrals worked much better than her net- working. Finally I understood that I did very well at bringing in business. My Own Business Lessons | 129 130 | THE MARKETING ATTITUDE Ø Only in the last few years, because so many clients and subscribers have mentioned it, have I realized that my moral beliefs and practices set me apart from some other marketers. It wouldn’t otherwise have oc- curred to me that considering moneymaking in the context of honesty and service could be a differentiat- ing factor.   “If you always do what interests you, at least one person is pleased.” –Katharine Hepburn Food for Thought 25-Year Marketing Insights, Part IV Lesson #4 from 25 years of being in business: Keep your feet firmly on the ground instead of getting swept up in what seems to be the hot new thing. During the Internet gold rush, many of my peers scram- bled to get their piece of the action. Some closed down de- pendable businesses in favor of unproven concepts or high salaries at companies that did not last. I had job offers that would have required me to suspend the business I’d worked hard to build. So I said no. And I did not redefine my focus to online-only expertise, specializing in tactics that could quickly become obsolete. Consequently, my income dipped only slightly with the dot-com crash and quickly rebounded. By understanding and applying the fundamental princi- ples of marketing and persuasive communication–knowing who you’re selling to, differentiating a company from com- My Own Business Lessons | 131 132 | THE MARKETING ATTITUDE petitors, generating targeted offers–I maintained compe- tence that can’t go out of date. And unlike those who flitted around during the dot-com boom, I still have clients who’ve been hiring me and singing my praises to others for more than ten years.   On the Web Read my tips on creating an email newsletter that lasts: www.yudkin.com/stay.htm What You Already Know Occasionally I get a product return or refund request with the rationale, “I already know all this.” I process the refund, of course, but sadly. My regret is not for my loss of revenue but for the buyer’s loss of value. I’ve experienced countless inspirations from reading or listening to points I already know. Ø Being reminded of something you’d forgotten can bounce against a problem you’re currently trying to solve, sending the 8-ball right into the pocket. Ø What you know but aren’t implementing isn’t doing you much good! Listening to or reading what you al- ready know can rouse you into action. Ø An expert who knows what you do may add surpris- ing examples or perspectives challengingly different from yours. My Own Business Lessons | 133 134 | THE MARKETING ATTITUDE Ø Communication strengths or flaws can teach you what to do or not to do in your own work. Ø The very process of engaging with a topic sets thoughts swirling into novel patterns. For me, audio listening is particularly generative. If my neighbors asked what I’m scribbling as they drive past me walking with a headset on my ears, I’d say, “Ideas sparked by stuff I already know.”   “Advice is what we ask for when we already know the an- swer but wish we didn’t.” –Erica Jong Food for Thought Time for “Thank You” Inspired by the holiday season, I think, last week I received an unusual number of “thank you”s and tributes from subscribers. This reminded me that the “thank you”s should equally be headed in the opposite direction. Every week, well over 11,000 of you decide to let me into your in-boxes, and I want you to know that I do not take that permission for granted. Without you, I would be missing a powerful stimulus for reflection and growth. So, thank you for your interest and for the minute or so that we spend to- gether every week. Thanks for agreeing with me–and for disagreeing with me. (I’m not always right, and I enjoy knowing you see things differently.) Thanks for correcting my errors. (Like the time dozens told me “inertia” should have been “entropy.”) My Own Business Lessons | 135 136 | THE MARKETING ATTITUDE Thanks for forwarding my emails to friends, colleagues, clients, students, networks, blogs or your Twitter followers. Thanks for sending questions, clippings and topic ideas for future Marketing Minutes. Most of all, thanks for the challenge of creating a zippy, useful marketing tip or anecdote week after week.   “When you are grateful, fear disappears and abundance appears.” –Anthony Robbins Food for Thought Part 7 Recession-Proof Marketing When Recession is in the Air In 2001, my two biggest dot-com clients had to cut me out of their plans. I had to hustle to make the year’s income match the previous year’s, but I was not concerned because I knew which marketing tactics to use when the economy contracts. Most businesses pay much too much attention to acquir- ing new customers and too little to current and former ones. When recession is in the air, it’s especially smart to contact your customer base more often. Studies show that it costs one-fifth as much to sell again to your customers as to turn a stranger into a buyer. Remember too that when folks believe a slowdown is in process, they become more cautious. Therefore anything you can do to reduce buyers’ risk will help. Reconsider your guar- antees–can you make them stronger? Add more testimonials to your marketing materials. When you do contact people Recession-Proof Marketing | 139 140 | THE MARKETING ATTITUDE not already within your sphere of influence, extend a get-to- know-you special offer that invites them over your threshold with little ventured and much gained.   On the Web Download a free booklet, 33 Keys to Thriving During a Recession: www.yudkin.com/recess.htm Don’t Let Customers Feel Neglected According to BBC radio in 2001, animals in the Col- chester Zoo were suffering effects of Britain’s foot-and- mouth disease outbreak. None actually caught the illness, but because zoos shut down as a precaution, animals were beginning to show signs of depression. They missed the hu- man crowds to which they had grown accustomed. As I listened to this story, I immediately drew a parallel with the economic slowdown in the United States. Advertis- ing spending had dramatically shrunk, in many cases as a precaution against possible cash flow problems rather than as a remedy for a bona fide financial crisis. “People should maintain spending to keep and expand market share,” I said to an editor for a chain of community newspapers. “Folks don’t think that way,” he replied sadly. Recession-Proof Marketing | 141 142 | THE MARKETING ATTITUDE The BBC story gave me a new angle on this. If you stop sending catalogs and cut back on ads, customers will miss you and feel neglected. Keep marketing–and you’ll be among fewer businesses reaching their mailbox or appearing in their magazines. Picture customers’ long faces, then make them brighter.   “The man who stops advertising to save money is like the man who stops the clock to save time.” –Anonymous Food for Thought Bob Bly’s Advice for the Last Recession Don’t get cocky. No matter how successful and busy you are, your business can take a downturn. Quickly. And quite unexpectedly. Take it from me.” Bob Bly wrote these words in his 1991 book, Selling Your Services, revealing that when the recession of 1990 hit, his two biggest clients stopped giving him work. His best source of leads slammed to a halt. His proposals were turned down one after the other. His income plummeted. He recovered within months, though, with these and other strategies: Ø Get back in touch with former clients and those who previously put projects on ice. Ø Propose new projects to current clients. Ø Bid at the lower end of your usual fee structure. Ø Give great service and don’t be temperamental. Ø Accept smaller jobs than you previously would. Ø Spend more time and energy marketing. Recession-Proof Marketing | 143 144 | THE MARKETING ATTITUDE Above all, he says, keep a positive attitude. “If you are depressed, prospects can sense your desperation and fear. Remember that you are talented and successful; the lull is temporary; and people will call you and hire you again.” Timely wisdom for many people.   “Adversity has the effect of eliciting talents, which in prosperous circumstances would have lain dormant.” –Horace Food for Thought In a Recession, Reconnect Years ago, Bob Bly wrote an article on marketing your way through a recession. He suggested that simply by calling past clients to say hello and find out what was going on in their business, you would get an average of one out of ten giving you a new assignment simply because you showed up in their awareness at an opportune time. My experience bears this out. A new client, an attorney, asked me what kind of work I’d previously done for attor- neys. So I contacted two lawyer clients to find out whether or not I could give their names as references to the new client. Two out of two, in addition to saying “of course,” asked if I could help them out with a current project. “Warning: Don’t call up and say, ‘I’m not busy and need work right now; do you have any assignments?’” says Bly. In one case, before sending my email, I visited the past client’s web site and learned he had won a major publishing Recession-Proof Marketing | 145 146 | THE MARKETING ATTITUDE award. Congratulating him on that news was a perfect way to reestablish our connection.   On the Web Find out how to network your way to connections that spell success: www.yudkin.com/networking.htm Before You Lower Prices Should you lower prices when cash flow slows down? Not necessarily. Try these tactics first: Ø Payment plan. Divide what clients owe into more in- stallments than usual, which often feels more afford- able to them. Ø Discount for prompt or early payment. Not only do you thereby get your money sooner, you lessen the odds of having uncollectable receivables later on. Ø Delayed payment. If prepayment or payment on deliv- ery is standard in your industry, allow people to pay later, perhaps even much later. Ø Bulk rates. Charge less when people buy more. This often raises the amount of your average order while making people think they got a great deal. Ø Bargains. Promote low prices on items or services you don’t ordinarily sell but that make good “loss leaders,” Recession-Proof Marketing | 147 148 | THE MARKETING ATTITUDE enabling new customers to sample your stuff and be- come more interested. Ø Bonuses. Offer extras with each purchase. Colleagues in related businesses may happily furnish bonuses at no cost to you for the promotional value this holds for them. Anything you can do to reinforce perceptions that you provide top-notch quality helps you keep prices stable, too.   “I buy expensive suits. They just look cheap on me.” –Warren Buffet Food for Thought Recession? Don’t Run Scared During a recession, scared businesses tend to cut back on marketing expenses. This appears to be the smart bet. After all, most customers have become more cautious about spending. So why not conserve your resources, wait out the downturn and have funds to spend when the econo- my picks up? In fact, smart businesses expand during a recession because they know there will be a shakeout caused by the scared businesses shrinking. During any recession, there are always more than enough clients out there to keep you busy if you continue to market, and market smartly. Capitalize on your strengths. Make the most of your business relationships. Create or revive pro- grams that enable customers to move ahead. (I just filled a seminar teaching a highly marketable specialized skill.) Above all, stay upbeat, putting the dynamics of self-fulfilling prophecies in your favor. Recession-Proof Marketing | 149 150 | THE MARKETING ATTITUDE If you behave like the scared businesses, or target them, you will contract. If you market to the smart businesses dur- ing a recession, you will continue to prosper. It’s up to you. On the Web   Discover five options for generating income fast: www.yudkin.com/newfast.htm The Get-Clients-Next-Week Formula Numerous Marketing Minute subscribers have been ask- ing me how to get clients in today’s slower economy. Here’s the winning formula. 1. Select a problem urgently felt by people or companies you know how to find. Sample problem: High gas prices have tripled the no-show rate at high-profile restaurants. 2. Create a specific offer that solves the problem for a low cost and that serves as a logical lead-in to your usual product or service. For instance: “For $295, I’ll suggest five creative and publicity-worthy incentives not being used in your mar- ketplace.” (Upon getting excited about those ideas, some will want to hire you to execute them.) 3. Give the offer a catchy name, such as “The No More Skittery Customers Solution.” 4. Add scarcity–you have space in your schedule for just three new clients or the offer is valid only through the Wednesday after Labor Day. Recession-Proof Marketing | 151 152 | THE MARKETING ATTITUDE 5. Put the offer in front of potential customers by calling them, sending a postcard or emailing them. Because desperation repels, take these steps with confi- dence and a positive attitude.   “In good times, people want to advertise; in bad times, they have to.” –Bruce Barton Food for Thought Be Choosy, Even in a Recession According to Reed Holden and Mark Burton, authors of Pricing With Confidence, 79 percent of business-to- business companies serve any customer they can get. What’s wrong with that? Typically, they explain, 20 per- cent of the customers account for 225 percent of the profit, with 80 percent causing the firm to lose money. And that statistic doesn’t take into account the extent to which the un- profitable customers increase your worry wrinkles and gray hairs. Being choosy about customers benefits both the bottom line and your sanity. Consider sending away those who: Ø Always press you for discounts Ø Need or demand an exorbitant amount of handhold- ing Ø Previously requested refunds Ø Are unpleasant to deal with, nitpicky, abusive, fren- zied, uncooperative or irrational Recession-Proof Marketing | 153 154 | THE MARKETING ATTITUDE Ø Threaten to go to the competition Ø Never pay on time Ø Represent where your company used to be rather than where it is going “It’s simply better for you that unprofitable customers are served by your competition,” say Holden and Burton. After shedding the undesirables, develop a clear picture of who you want as clients and pursue those. You’ll then have the positive energy needed to land them.   “He who chooses the beginning of a road chooses the place it leads to.” –Harry Emerson Fosdick Food for Thought Part 8 Customer Service Matters The Math of Satisfaction Are your clients “satisfied”? Maybe even “very satisfied”? Then get worried. According to customer service guru Ron Zemke, the mathematics of customer satisfaction have surprising implications. If customers rate you on a five-point scale, the increase in loyalty from two (poor) to three (satisfactory) is minimal. Improving your score from three to four (good) gets you just a modest rise. Only when you boost your rank from four to five (excellent) does customer loyalty take a dramatic jump: someone who gives you a five is two to six times more loyal than some who gives you a four. Now let’s translate that into revenue. You get a dramati- cally greater payoff moving fours to fives than raising threes to fours, because you will lose just a fraction of the fives every year compared to the fours. Fives spend exponentially more with you in the long run than fours. Customer Service Matters | 157 158 | THE MARKETING ATTITUDE Anything less than a five–“extremely satisfied” or “de- lighted”–and your buyers remain iffy and unreliable. What steps can you take today to lift your ratings to the top of the scale?   On the Web What is the optimal refund rate? Read Marketing Minute subscribers’ input on that question: www.yudkin.com/refunds.htm Small Touches, Big Impact While interviewing financial services clients about their experiences at one firm’s office, Marketing Minute subscriber Reva Dolobowsky found a surprisingly large impression left by a simple gesture. Being offered cof- fee in the waiting room set a tone of hospitality and helped transform what could have been a stressful meeting into a positive one. Clients also liked the fact that their advisor highlighted important points in a packet of information he was giving them to take home, and inserted all the materials tidily into a folder. “This was psychologically calming for the clients, signifying that chaos had been turned into order,” says Dolo- bowsky, head of Dolobowsky Qualitative Services. In another focus group, customers expressed apprecia- tion for handles on big bags of pet food. “This often over- looked detail expresses a thoughtful concern for making cus- tomers’ lives easier,” Dolobowsky notes. Customer Service Matters | 159 160 | THE MARKETING ATTITUDE “Another thing that comes up again and again from cus- tomers is tone of voice. When someone is being patient with them, they can tell right away, and it matters,” she adds. What extra touches do you offer that have an emotional impact on customers?   “There are no traffic jams along the extra mile.” –Roger Staubach Food for Thought Soliciting Useful Customer Feedback As a shopper, I go nuts when a store is perpetrating some easily avoidable outrage on customers and there’s no easy way to tell the managers. As a marketer, I don’t under- stand why suggestion boxes, common in my youth, have gone out of fashion. The most popular feedback tool today is comment cards, usually in the format of self-addressed postcards. Marketing Minute subscriber Susan Keane Baker, author of Managing Patient Expectations, offers these do’s and don’ts based on more than 20 years of experience with the use of comment cards by hospitals. Ø Keep the number of questions to a minimum. Ø Avoid two-part questions. “Confuse them and lose them!” says Susan. Ø Tell customers you appreciate their feedback. Customer Service Matters | 161 162 | THE MARKETING ATTITUDE Ø If you ask for respondents’ personal information, do so at the end of the card, not the beginning. ØMake comment cards available where customers wait, or mail them with your newsletter or invoices. Ø Ask permission to share what they’ve said, as in “Please initial here if we may share your comments on our web site.” Making customer feedback easy is a must when you aim at excellence.   On the Web To learn how to generate more repeat business, listen to a coaching session in which I help the owner of a translation agency with both traditional and innovative customer reten- tion tactics. It’s a free downloadable audio just for readers of this book: www.yudkin.com/repeatbiz.htm Apologies That Defuse Disaster Inevitably, you will make some horrible mistake. To keep the mistake from turning into a disaster, understand the difference between an apology that appeases indignation and one that turns a spark into a public relations wildfire. An effective apology has three components. Ø Admit blame. Say that what you did was wrong. Ø Express regret. Say the magic words: “I’m sorry.” Ø Extend an olive branch. Offer something to help take away the sting of the harm done by the mistake. Do not offer excuses. This is probably the hardest part of the formula. Do not blame the person who was wronged. You may have read about the magazine based in my neck of the woods, Cooks Source, which reprinted without permis- sion a previously published article. The author learned of this copyright infringement and complained. Customer Service Matters | 163 164 | THE MARKETING ATTITUDE The editor’s aggressive, you-should-be-grateful apology, shared by the aggrieved author and many outraged bloggers and news reporters, flashed around the Internet, igniting a firestorm of condemnation and the uncovering of scores of additional copyright violations. The magazine folded–mainly because of the wretched apology.   “The first rule of holes: When you’re in one, stop digging.” –Molly Ivins Food for Thought Where’s the Start Button? An entrepreneur profiled in Forbes Small Business called her system for sending payments via cell phone “sim- ple: once you complete the registration and download the software to your phone...” Simple? Yikes! Downloading software to my cell phone is something I’ve never done and would attempt only with trepidation. I’m a scaredy-cat when it comes to technology, and com- panies don’t cater to me. This week I looked at a disk I ordered from an informa- tion marketer and could not determine whether it was a CD or DVD. It arrived without a cover letter, with no instructions on or in the case. When I popped the disk into my computer, I could see both audio and video files on it, but the video files wouldn’t open properly no matter what I tried. I couldn’t find a “read me first” file on the disk, either. Also missing: a contact email. Customer Service Matters | 165 166 | THE MARKETING ATTITUDE What’s easy or obvious to a techie may not be to the cus- tomer. Keep in mind the power of fear and unfamiliarity. Plan for rampant cluelessness and you’ll see wider success.   “If you have knowledge, let others light their candle at it.” –Margaret Fuller Food for Thought Worried About Bothering Customers? Ionce read something shocking from Anne Holland, Mar- keting Sherpa’s Content Director: Some 40 percent of those who purchased her company’s PDF reports did not download what they bought–much less read them. After discovering this, Holland took steps to encourage customers to consume what they bought. After all, except for shopaholics, buyers who don’t use an item won’t turn into repeat customers or recommend the company. This story completely changed my feeling about follow- up after the sale. Instead of thinking, “Well, they bought, now it’s up to them to put it into action,” I understand now that it doesn’t serve them if what they were trying to do or learn remains in the purgatory of their to-do list. I am hardly bothering customers if I send follow-up mes- sages like these: Customer Service Matters | 167 168 | THE MARKETING ATTITUDE Ø Don’t feel overwhelmed! Here are two ways to get started. Ø Still have questions? Some have wondered about X or Y. Read today’s additional tips. Ø Here’s how so-and-so used the product you bought. Such follow-ups help customers–and by doing so, also help the company sending them.   “We are here on earth to do good to others. What the others are here for, I don’t know.” –W.H. Auden Food for Thought No Parking? No Problem! Considering the traffic, scarcity of metered spaces, ex- pensive parking garages and merciless ticketers, driv- ing to do business errands in downtown Boston is not for the faint of heart. Tom Roulston, a Business Printing Specialist at the Kinko’s near Boston’s Government Center, makes this chore easier for his regular customers. They call him on their cell phone and describe what they’re driving, and he goes outdoors to meet them in their car. While the car is double parked with the engine running, he takes their printing or copying order. For the customer: no ticket, no parking fee, no need to drive around the block looking for a non-existent space. For Roulston: customer retention that costs him nothing but the willingness to leave the store at a moment’s notice. Marketing Minute subscriber Minerva Sprogis, a cus- tomer of Roulston’s and the owner of a consulting com- pany called The Magic of Manners, told this story during Customer Service Matters | 169 170 | THE MARKETING ATTITUDE a Recession-Proof Marketing seminar. “I’m not a huge cus- tomer, but Tom makes me feel like a million bucks when he meets me in my car,” she says.   “If you don’t care, your customer never will.” –Marlene Blaszczyk Food for Thought A Tale of Two Banks Last week I called a local bank where I’d opened an ac- count two weeks earlier. I hadn’t yet received the box of checks they’d ordered. Could they please print me four checks that I’d pick up in an hour? An hour later, I walked into the bank, and a teller waved the checks in the air and rushed over to hand them to me with a big smile. I smiled back in astonishment. The teller had seen me exactly once before. Her warmth was echoed by others in the office. In New England, where I live, such feelings are rare in everyday business transactions. Compare now the branch of a large national bank that tries hard to be friendly. A designated greeter waylays me with pointless conversation. The tellers always chat me up, and once when I failed to play along, a teller repeated her question to me more aggressively. Customer Service Matters | 171 172 | THE MARKETING ATTITUDE The policy-driven friendliness of the second bank grates on me so strongly that I dread going there during business hours. I feel the opposite about my new bank. Don’t fake it. Phony cheer chills the soul.   “Honesty and transparency make you vulnerable. Be honest and transparent anyway.” –Mother Teresa Food for Thought Appreciative Gestures Work People like to be thanked. People like to feel important. I know these principles intellectually, yet still I’ve been surprised to see how the famous Gallup Poll organiza- tion carries them out. For the last five months, I have been a member of the Gallup Poll “panel” (note the flattering term!), offering my opinions on politics, health care, consumer purchases, etc. As many times as I’ve been asked to fill out a four-page survey and send it back, I’ve received separate mailings en- closing a magnet, a memo pad, a calendar, a members-only magazine–always thanking me for my generosity and ser- vice, urging me to get in touch if I have questions. On every survey, they even ask how interesting it was. Their sincerity feels real. Aren’t they going overboard? I’ve wondered, then re- mind myself that their testing undoubtedly shows that such Customer Service Matters | 173 174 | THE MARKETING ATTITUDE gestures keep their respondents from sighing and rolling their eyes when another survey form arrives in the mail. It feels great to be appreciated. Do you see a lesson here for your business? I do: Never take customers for granted.   “The person who has stopped being thankful has fallen asleep in life.” –Robert Louis Stevenson Food for Thought Recommended Books The following books provide valuable insights into mar- keting fundamentals, especially the inner side of at- tracting and keeping customers. Abraham, Jay, Getting Everything You Can Out of All You’ve Got: 21 Ways You Can Out-Think, Out-Perform, and Out-Earn the Competition. New York: St. Martin’s, 2001. Tips for growing your business from one success to the next. Goldsmith, Marshall, What Got You Here Won’t Get You There: How Successful People Become Even More Success- ful. New York: Hyperion, 2007. Learn how to overcome your business blind spots and get out of your own way. Hill, Napoleon, The Law of Success. New York: Tarcher/Pen- guin, 2008 [and many other editions]. Originally pub- lished in 1928, this is a timelessly wise course in achiev- ing success from the inside out. Recommended Books | 175 176 | THE MARKETING ATTITUDE Kennedy, Dan S., No B.S. Business Success. Irvine, CA: Entre- preneur Press, 2004. A good place to start if you haven’t yet encountered this street-smart expert’s marketing and self-management perspectives. Levinson, Jay Conrad, The Way of the Guerrilla: Achieving Success and Balance as an Entrepreneur in the 21st Cen- tury. New York: Houghton Mifflin, 1997. How to create a business you love that sustains you in return. RoAne, Susan, How to Create Your Own Luck: The “You Nev- er Know” Approach to Networking, Taking Chances, and Opening Yourself to Opportunity. Hoboken, NJ: Wiley, 2004. Teaches the art of creating and seizing opportuni- ties. Vitale, Joe, There’s a Customer Born Every Minute: P.T. Bar- num’s Secrets to Business Success. Hoboken, NJ: Wiley, 2007. A fun read offering a three-ring circus of ideas for overcoming business obstacles and creatively capturing public attention. Yudkin, Marcia, 6 Steps to Free Publicity, 3rd edition. Frank- lin Lakes, NJ: Career Press, 2009. Contains a chapter on overcoming fears of self-promotion, along with ideas for spreading the word by harnessing the media, network- ing, public speaking, social media and more. Get the Whole Series! What you are reading is the fifth of five volumes col- lecting my Marketing Minute columns and present- ing them by theme. The other volumes are: Book 1: Persuading People to Buy: Insights on Marketing Psychology That Pay Off for Your Company, Professional Practice or Nonprofit Organization Book 2: Meatier Marketing Copy: Insights on Copywriting That Generates Leads and Sparks Sales Book 3: Strategic Marketing: Insights on Setting Smart Directions for Your Business Book 4: Publicity Tactics: Insights on Creating Lucrative Media Buzz The series includes two audio CDs for each volume, on which I read the columns in that book. Listening to the con- tents in your car or while exercising often triggers ideas you’ll want to implement in your company, professional practice or nonprofit organization. Get the Whole Series! | 177 178 | THE MARKETING ATTITUDE For more information or to purchase the rest of the Mar- keting Insight Guides, go to: www.marketinginsightguides.com. If you’re not already a subscriber, sign up to receive the Marketing Minute free in your inbox every Wednesday by going to www.yudkin.com/markmin.htm. Index 33 Keys to Thriving During a Reces- sion 140 Abraham, Jay 175 Advertising 109–110 Allen, Robert G. 56 Angelou, Maya 16 Apologies 163–164 Appreciation 173–174 Arden, Elizabeth 106 Asking 17–18 Assumptions 61–62 Attitude v–vi, 144, 149–150 Attraction 67–68 Auditory orientation 25 Authentic Promotion 93 Baker, Bob 71 Baker, Susan Keane 161 Ball, Lucille 102 Barnum, P.T. 29 Barton, Bruce 152 BBC 141 Beliefs, self-sabotaging 51–52 Berkeley, Bishop George 33 Blake, Tony 117 Blaszczyk, Marlene 170 Bly, Bob 143–146 Bombeck, Erma 26 Bonuses 148 Bowerman, Peter 79 Branding Yourself Online 71 Buffet, Warren 148 Buren, Abigail Van 15 Burnett, Leo 28 Burton, Mark 153 Business lessons 125–136 Cambridge Center for Adult Educa- tion 128 Caples, John 113 Carl, Walter 111 Clark, Steve 51–52 Coca-Cola 23 Colchester Zoo 141 Cold calls 78–79 Coleridge, Samuel Taylor 118 Commodity, seen as 85–86 Controversy 113–116 Conway, Andrea 115 Cooks Source 163–164 Coolidge, Calvin 83 Cosby, Bill 54 Couric, Katie 52 Index | 179 180 | THE MARKETING ATTITUDE CowgirlSmarts.com 119–120 Credibility 94 Crises, client 57–58 Customer comments 127–128 Customer contact 107–108 Darling, Diane 101–102 Delays, marketing 29–34 Difficult customers 91 DiMaggio, Joe 46 Doerr, John 63 Dolobowsky, Reva 159 Edison, Thomas A. 32 Einstein, Albert 96 e-Loyalty 119 Emergencies, client 57–58 Employees, respect for 59–60 Entropy 22 Fakery 171–172 Familiarity 35–36 Fans 44, 71–74 Fast income 150–152 Feedback 27–28, 161–162 Fees 18 Fees and Pricing Benchmark Report: Consulting Industry 2008 63 Follow-up messages 167–168 Forbes Small Business 165 Former customers 139 Fosdick, Harry Emerson 154 Friendliness 171–172 Fripp, Patricia 111 Fritz, Robert 29 Frost, Robert 22 Fuller, Margaret 166 Galileo 100 Gallup Poll 173 Gandhi, Mahatma 128 Garland, Judy 74 Gestures, appreciative 159 Goldsmith,Marshall 175 Gordo, Molly 93 Gratitude 135–136 Halbert, Gary 39 Harding, Warren G. 83 Harriman, E.H. 41 Hart, Ben 110 Henrichs, Garth 114 Hepburn, Katharine 130 Hill, Napoleon 13–14, 175 Holden, Reed 153 Holiday, Billie 78 Holland, Anne 167 Honesty 130 Horace 144 How to Work a Room 101 Hubbard, Elbert 60 Hug Your Customers 57 Ideal clients 94 Information formats 26 Intention 115–116 Introverts 81–84 Ivins, Molly 164 James, William 66 Jargon 61–62 Jong, Erica 134 Keillor, Garrison 81 Kelly, Kevin 73 Kennedy, Dan S. 176 Kinesthetic orientation 25 Kissinger, Henry 41–42 Kroc, Ray 70 Landers, Ann 92 Lawler, Jennifer 45 Law of Success, The 13 Learning styles 25 Levinson, Jay Conrad 176 Liked, being 51–54 Lipe, Jay 31–32 Lones, Denise 107 Lones Group, The 107 Lord, Winston 41–42 Lubin, Joann 101 Luck Factor, The 35–36 Managing Patient Expectations 161 Mankoff, Robert 53 Marketing education 99–100 Marketing infrastructure 105–106 Marketing Minute vi, 21, 30, 51, 58, 59, 71, 73, 100, 101, 136, 151, 158, 159, 161, 169, 177, 178 Marketing Sherpa 167 Marketing Toolkit for Growing Busi- nesses, The 31 Maturity 24 McTaggart, Lynne 116 Mistakes 23–24 Motivation That Works 115 Muir, Diana 19 Musts 77–78 NBC Nightly News 101 Networking 146 Networking Survival Guide, The 102 New customers 139 NewSchoolSelling.com 51 New Yorker, The 53–54 New York Times, The 125 Numbers 95–96 Obama, Barack 34 Occupational title 85 Okwuosa, Ike 87 Olivier, Laurence 81 Opportunity 15–16 Path of Least Resistance, The 29 Patience 29–32 Personal Finance Radio 113 Personality 81–82 Philosophy, business 87–88 Photos 89 Pipeline, marketing 105–106 Poise 13–14 Postcard marketing 108 Post-it Notes 111–112 Price complaints 65–66 Pricing 63–64, 147–148 Pricing With Confidence 153 Publicity Hound blog 121 Quality 39–48, 66, 148 Questions, customer 121–122 Recession marketing 139–154 Redefinition 85–86 Referrals 103–104 Refunds 133–134, 158 Repeat business 162 Results 29–32 RoAne, Susan 101, 176 Robbins, Anthony 136 Rule of Twelve, The 95 Saftlas, Zev 115 Satisfaction, customer 157–158 Schenkler, Arik 33 Schloff, Laurie 113 Schultz, Mike 63 Selling Your Services 143 Sherman, Mark 59 Smart Speaking 113 Smith, Ellen Reid 119–120 Smith, Liz 104 Sound 25–26 Index | 181 182 | THE MARKETING ATTITUDE So You Want to Write a Book 128 Staubach, Roger 160 Steinway pianos 113 Stereotypes 81–82 Stevenson, Robert Louis 174 Stewart, Joan 121 Stoutenburgh, Joann 15 Strengths, personal 129–130 Style, writing 90 Subservience 55–56 Teresa, Mother 172 Thoreau, Henry David 48 Tudor, Frederick 19 Twain, Mark 42 Union Pacific Railroad 41 Values 93–94 Visual orientation 25 Vitale, Joe 176 Voice 88, 160 Wall Street Journal, The 101 Weiss, Alan 18 Well-Fed Writer, The 79 West, Mae 90 Wilde, Stuart 86 Wiseman, Dr. Richard 35–36 Wooden, John 126 Words, power of 126 Writer’s Digest 45 Yellow Pages 109–110 Yost, Sam 15 Zemke, Ron 157 Zipcar 111 Zyman, Sergio 23 About the Author Since 1981, when she joined the ranks of the self-em- ployed after deciding college teaching didn’t suit her, Marcia Yudkin has built a worldwide reputation as an au- thor, consultant, coach and expert in creative marketing. Prior to the books in the Marketing Insight Guides se- ries, she published 11 books, including Freelance Writing for Magazines and Newspapers, a Book-of-the-Month Club se- lection, and 6 Steps to Free Publicity, now in its third edition. Her articles have appeared in publications as diverse as The New York Times Magazine, New Age Journal, Cosmopolitan and Business 2.0. Her “Marketing Minute” segment aired weekly through- out New England for more than a year on WABU TV, and it turned into a free weekly newsletter on marketing and pub- licity that reaches more than 12,000 loyal subscribers on five continents. About the Author | 183 184 | THE MARKETING ATTITUDE As a marketing mentor, Marcia Yudkin advises business owners, independent professionals and corporate marketers on actions and attitudes that attract ideal clients and keep them. Her clients range from publishers and software pro- ducers to financial planners, executive coaches, management consultants and psychotherapists. She has a Ph.D. degree from Cornell University and a B.A. from Brown University.   For More Information Main web site: www.yudkin.com Subscribe to the Marketing Minute: www.yudkin.com/markmin.htm Mentoring program: www.marketingformore.com Publicity services: www.pressreleasehelp.com Naming and tag line service: www.namedatlast.com Contact Marcia Yudkin: marcia@yudkin.com Marketing/Business “Marcia Yudkin is one of the very few hype-free and totally trustworthy sources of marketing information out there.” –Nick Usborne, Author, Net Words and New Path to Riches Happily Create Customers for Keeps If marketing is the art of creating a customer, sustainable marketing creates customers who want to stick around and who match the values and approach of the business owner or organization. Discover the rarely discussed assumptions and actions underpinning the ability to build a solid base of customers you enjoy doing business with. Drawing upon her 30 years of business successes and mistakes, creative marketing expert Marcia Yudkin explains the principles that help entrepreneurs and companies attract a distinct set of buyers while maintaining the enthusiasm of both sides. According to Yudkin, following formulas that worked for someone else doesn’t guarantee a successful outcome for you. Instead, cultivate your own business philosophy, tone, persona and pace. • QUALITY: Earn attention and loyalty by setting high standards and ignoring those who talk about business as a “numbers game” • INDIVIDUALITY: Discard myths standing in the way of your unique path to success • TIMING: Cultivate patience–a marketing necessity • DOWNTURNS: Know how to prevent and recover from a business famine • INFRASTRUCTURE: Understand why “Rinse and Repeat” is a profitable marketing mantra • SERVICE: Learn what customers really care about and why • FANS: Develop resiliency and staying power via a core group of supporters Author of 15 previous books, Marcia Yudkin is a popular marketing mentor and publicity coach. An introvert who delights in the spoken and written word and in the power of an unusual angle, she guides clients toward creative, practical, short-term and long- term business success. $15.99 Marketing Insight Guides Creative Ways Publishing www.marketinginsightguides.com