#so here is the ''hey even though i told you i would be on vacation i am on vacation and this is why i havent been posting as much''

[haddonfieldwhore]

florida!!! - aleksander barkov

aleksander barkov x reader

summary: while in florida on vacation you reconnect with someone from your past

warnings: a mixture of aleksander and sasha used throughout, angst, nsfw implied, small age gap (not specific), not edited (it’s 3am)

word count: 4.1k (oops)

“i’ve got some regrets, i’ll bury them in florida”

the smell of coconut wafted through your nose as you applied sunscreen for the third time that day, your skin not yet used to the heat of fort lauderdale. you were visiting for 2 weeks, a much needed vacation from your life back home, and you already felt relaxed after only two days here.

some of your friends were supposed to join you on the trip, but eventually cancelled, either not having the money or not being able to get the time off from work.

though it would have been more fun with them here, you didn’t mind travelling alone, having studied abroad in college and enjoyed every second of it.

well, mostly - you thought to yourself. despite only being here once before as a child, florida was bringing up some memories in your mind that had been long dormant. it wasn’t the state itself that was to blame though; it was something else. someone, to be more specific.

your phone rang in the back pocket of your shorts, and you swiped answer on the call.

“hey jessie,” you answered with a smile.

“hey! how’s florida?” your best friend asked.

“i wish you were here with me, but it’s still pretty amazing,” you admitted.

“i know, i wish i was there too,” she sighed. “next time, i promise - even if i have to quit my job so i can get the time,” she laughed.

“how will you pay for the trip then genius?”

“leave that to me.”

“alright,” you surrendered with a chuckle.

“see any hot guys yet?” she asked, of course that’s what she wanted to know.

“a few, not that i’m really looking,” you admitted. while there had been a few good looking men you had spotted while you were here, there was one specifically that was occupying your mind for the last few days; and you were trying to drown out any thoughts of him.

“did you decide if you’re going to a game or not?” jessie asked as if she had read your mind.

“maybe - the arena is right near my hotel, but i just don’t know if i’ll find the time,” you brushed it off.

“babe, you’re there for 2 weeks, i think you can find time if you want to.”

“you’re right,” you sighed deeply, flopping onto the soft duvet spread across the bed.

“i always am.”

“i’m gonna ignore that,” you smiled. “it’s not like i would see him anyway,” you thought out loud.

“unless you did.”

“that’s not helpful,” you replied with a roll of your eyes.

“i’m sorry!” jessie apologized. “and don’t roll your eyes at me, i can hear it in your voice,” she teased, and you both laughed.

during the 2 years that you had studied abroad in finland, you had wound up entangled with the one and only aleksander barkov; who in the years since then had blossomed in the national hockey league and become the captain of the florida panthers.

things were good for the most part, despite both of your busy schedules you made it work, and all too quickly found yourself falling for the handsome and humble man. he was a few years older than you, kind, handsome, and a perfect gentleman. there were ups and downs, and he was away from home a lot, but you made it work, keeping things casual and not exactly exclusive; not that you even entertained anyone else when he was gone. unfortunately, like most college relationships, things fell apart when you ended your studies there. you tried for a few months after you finished your courses, but despite your feelings for him, there wasn’t enough to keep you in finland without school to occupy you when he was gone so much of the time.

you thought back to the day that you told him you were leaving; the hurt in his eyes broke your heart, but you both knew the day was coming. you were on borrowed time and you both realized it long before either of you gained the courage to admit it.

“i don’t want you to go, but it’s selfish of me to ask you to stay,” he said sadly, and you buried your head in his chest, tears threatening to spill from your eyes as he wrapped his arms tightly around your body.

“we knew it wasn’t forever right?”

“yeah, we knew,” he mumbled, kissing the top of your head.

a part of you wished it could have been.

“are you listening to me?” jessie’s voice snapped you out of it, and you ran a hand over your face in frustration.

“yeah, sorry,” you shook your head, trying to think about anything else.

“you’re thinking about him, aren’t you?”

“it’s hard not to - knowing how close we are right now,” you sighed in defeat. you had found it hard to stop yourself from wondering how he was doing, besides thriving on a successful hockey team.

“you miss him.” the way she worded it, it wasn’t a question, you realized.

“our lives are so different and it’s been years since i’ve seen him, jess.” the last time you had seen sasha was when he dropped you off at the airport, the kiss goodbye was almost enough to make you stay. you had texted him when you landed back home, and you’d kept in touch for a few weeks, calling eachother here and there but the distance drove a wedge between you. soon enough life got busy and it was easier to lose contact.

“you didn’t answer the question,” she pointed out.

“i don’t even know if he’s the same person he was back then - i’m certainly not. and he’s a hotshot nhl captian now.”

“of course people change, but this is sasha were talking about. do you really think he’d be that different than he was when you knew him?” she asked. you had told her so much about him, it was like she knew him even though they’d never met. and it was true; the sasha you knew would never let the fame get to him.

“i don’t know him anymore.”

“if you say so. i got to get back to work, my break is over. i’ll call you in a few days?”

“sounds good,” you replied. “love you jess.”

“love you too. keep me updated.”

before you could protest she hung up, and you tossed your phone onto the pillow next to you.

you stared at the ceiling for a few minutes, before grabbing your phone again, opening it to contacts without realizing what you were doing until your finger hovered over the name ‘sasha’.

you hesitated for a moment before closing the app, and googling florida panthers tickets instead.

•

three days later you found yourself sat in one of the crimson seats of amerant bank arena, waiting for the game to begin. you casually followed the nhl, not watching every game, but for obvious reasons, you had a soft spot for the south florida team; it helped that they were fun to watch and had become a force to be reckoned with these last few seasons.

as interested as you were in the game, you found it hard to focus on anything but the memories of aleksander that had continued to float around in your mind for the duration of your vacation. you had woken up this morning with an ache between your legs as you dreamt of the last night you had spent tangled with sasha beneath the sheets of his bed. you could still remember the way his hands felt tracing every inch of your body; not even a cold shower could erase it.

you’d considered not going to the game despite having bought a ticket, but wanted to experience a panthers game while you were here, unsure of when you would get the chance to see them play at home again.

the panthers won, and you weren’t sure if it was the adrenaline from the crowd lingering, but you found you thumb hovering over sasha’s contact in you phone again as you sat next to the pool back at the hotel later that night.

you decided against a phone call, typing out a text message before you could talk yourself out of it.

hey - it’s y/n from college. congrats on the win tonight! :)

a simple ‘hey’ didn’t seem like enough - you weren’t even sure if he had the same number after all these years, or if he remembered you at all. the doubt started to set in the second you hit send, the possibility that you hadn’t left as much of an impact on him as he had with you setting in fast.

what if he didn’t remember you at all?

you decided to call jessie to distract your mind, and you were thankful that it didn’t take her long to pick up.

“hey! i was just about to call you!”

“great minds think alike,” you laughed, her voice putting you at ease a little already.

“what’s up?” she asked.

“just sitting by the pool,” you replied. you hadn’t told her you’d decided to go to the game, and you hadn’t decided if you were going to tell her about the text you’d sent or not yet.

“ugh i’m jealous. i’m considering ditching work and flying out there to join you at this point. you’re still there for another week or so hey?” she asked.

“yeah, 9 more days actually. it would be nice to have you here, jess.”

“is everything okay?” she asked, always able to tell when something was bothering you.

“yeah, i think i just got too much sun today, my head hurts.” you weren’t entirely lying, but you just hoped she didn’t check the weather and see that it had been cloudy in fort lauderdale that day.

“bet you never had that problem in finland, hey?” you knew she was teasing, the climate in finland in fact being drastically drearier than florida, but you were hoping to not think about that for at least a few minutes.

“yeah, definitely not.”

despite the cold, you loved everything about finland. it took some getting used to the dark and cold, but each time aleksander showed you around different places around the country, you knew you would find it harder to leave.

for more reasons than just the scenery.

the day he showed you around his home town of tampere finland was the day you realized that you were falling in love with him.

you walked hand in hand down crowded streets, sasha pointing out different things from his childhood, like where he grew up playing hockey, his favourite restaurants, everything.

you looked up at him in wonder as the glow of the street lights illuminated his face, a light pink tinge across his cheeks and nose from the cold. fluffy white snowflakes fell softly around you, gathering atop the beanie that covered his head and across his broad shoulders.

it was only a few months since you had met, but it felt like you had known him for years. you never imagined a day would come where it would feel like you were strangers, even knowing that your time in finland was temporary.

“you don’t have to leave,” he had said, only a month left in your final semester abroad.

you laid bare next to him, his bedsheets the only thing covering your body as you fiddled absentmindedly with his hands, tracing calluses with your fingertips.

“once the semester is over i won’t have a place to stay, i can’t stay at the dorm.” you had gotten a job at a coffee shop that made you enough money to afford food and necessities, but you couldn’t afford an apartment with that salary, and hadn’t intended to get a job in your chosen field here. the plan was always to go home after your schooling was done.

“you could stay here, with me.”

it wasn’t an absurd idea; you spent a lot of nights at aleksanders house anyway when he wasn’t on the road. but in reality, he wasn’t home that often, and you would feel weird living in his house without him.

“you mean it?” you asked, your heart aching at the thought that even if he said yes, you knew your answer was no. part of him knew it too.

a notification went off on your phone, and you snapped out of your daydream, realizing that you’d once again become lost in memories of what once was.

you pulled your phone away from your ear, jessie’s voice getting quieter as she went on about something that happened at work today. you knew you were being a bad friend, and made a mental note to make it up to her later.

you saw that you had a text message and your breath caught in your throat as you tapped on it.

hey ☺��� it’s been a long time. you watched the game?

you stared at the message, suprised he’d responded so fast, if at all.

“i’m sorry, i gotta go, my phones about to die, i’ll call you tomorrow, okay?” jessie said, and you said a quick goodbye before you both hung up, leaving you alone to deal with your thoughts.

what had you intended when you texted sasha? you weren’t sure even you knew, but typed out a reply anyway; deciding you would figure it out as you went.

i was there actually - i’m in florida for a few days.

you impatiently waited as the three dots appeared to indicate that he was typing.

oh wow. thank you for coming to the game.

you smiled.

i wouldn’t miss it.

it took a few minutes after he read the message for him to reply this time, and you worried you’d said something wrong. deciding you didn’t want to sit by the pool anymore, you wrapped your towel around yourself, fighting of the evening chill that had begun to tickle your skin.

you’d made it up to your hotel room by the time your phone went off again, though it was a text this time; it was ringing. you assumed it was jessie, but froze when you saw sasha’s name light up the screen instead.

should i answer it? you thought.

a thousand reasons why you should or shouldn’t ran through your mind, but you ultimately swiped accept and closed the door behind you as you stepped in to your suite.

“hi,” you answered nervously. all these years later and he still had this much of an effect on you.

“hi,” he replied, and you couldn’t help but smile at the sound of his voice. “it really is you.”

“did you think it might not be?” you laughed slightly, and on the other end of the call, aleksander realized how much he’d missed the sound.

“i don’t know, maybe,” he admitted. “it’s good to hear from you.”

your heart skipped a beat.

“how have you been?” you asked, pacing around the room. despite how easily sasha used to be able to put you at ease, you couldn’t stay still.

“i’m good,” he replied, and you had forgotten that he was a man of few words at times. “what about you? what brings you to florida?”

you couldn’t exactly tell him that you had been good save for the fact that he was all you’d thought about for the last few days.

“good,” you decided was your answer. “why did you call instead of texting?” you asked. it had been years since you last spoke, but you felt like you were back in college, calling him while he was on the road to hear about his latest game.

“oh… i just wanted to hear your voice i guess,” he admitted, a blush forming across his face that he was glad you couldn’t see.

sasha sat in his car outside the restaurant where he and some of his teammates had been out to celebrate their victory when you texted, and he had excused himself to make a phone call, quietly sneaking out to his car.

of course he’d thought about you in the years since you left finland, always considering you to be the one that got away, despite the fact that you both knew from the beginning that you’d be leaving.

he hadn’t expected you to text him out of the blue that you were in florida, and it made him anxious to know that you were so close, especially knowing that you had been at the game earlier that day.

a happy anxious.

“yeah, it’s nice to hear your voice too.”

“are you coming to the game later this week?” he asked. you hadn’t planned on it, but the way he asked made you hope it meant that he wanted you to say yes.

“i might be, i’ll have to see about getting a ticket,” you replied, giving an open ended answer.

“if you need a ticket i can send you one,” he said, before quickly adding. “if you want.”

“do you want me there?” you asked, hoping you weren’t being too bold to assume that could be what he meant.

“of course i do.”

•

you spent the next few days feeling like you were floating on air, like you would wake up any moment and this would all be a dream.

you had been texting aleksander almost constantly, and he called you every night, catching up on the years you had missed, though it felt like no time had passed.

you were suprised when he had asked you to meet him after the game tomorrow, which he had in fact gotten you a ticket for. you tried to offer to pay for it, but he refused. you knew he could easily get them for free as the captain, but still felt wrong taking it.

you were getting ready to head to the arena, when your phone rang.

“are you ever actually working when you’re at your job?” you laughed as you accepted the call from jessie.

“i’m on my break for your information,” she argued playfully.

“fair enough. how are things back home?”

“boring without you of course,” she laughed.

“obviously,” you teased.

“did you decide if you’re going to the game tonight?” she asked, and you half wondered if she had cameras watching you.

“i am actually getting ready to go right now, stalker.”

“good - i’m sure you’ll have a great time,” she replied. “and who knows, maybe you’ll run into a certain finnish captian while you’re there…”

“i doubt it,” you lied. you still hadn’t told her that you’d already gone to a game, or that you’d been talking with sasha non stop for the last three days.

“you never know. cupid works in mysterious ways.”

“jess…”

“i know im just teasing.”

you talked for a few more minutes before you had to leave to go the arena, still thinking about what she had said.

if only she knew, you laughed to yourself.

•

you waited in your rental car after the game for aleksander to text you where to meet him, giving him time to shower and talk with the team after yet another panthers win.

he had let them know that he wouldn’t be joining them to celebrate tonight, but hadn’t told them why, deciding to keep your existence a secret for now as neither of you were sure exactly that this was.

you phone went off and you checked to see that he had sent you his location, still at the arena but he must have parked on the other side where fans couldn’t usually go.

you drove over until you saw him standing outside the players entrance, and your heart rate sped up.

talking on the phone was one thing, but seeing him in person was different.

you hoped you looked okay as you parked and got out, walking up to him with a smile.

“hey,” he smiled, and you couldn’t resist the urge to embrace him in a hug, which he thankfully returned.

sasha felt a pang in his heart as he held you tight to his chest, your arms wrapped around the back of his neck. he missed this; sure he had moved on with his life in the time you had spent apart, but there was a part of him that always wondered what it would have been like to have you there by his side the whole time.

“did you get taller?” you laughed, and he smiled, blushing softly like he always did anytime you complimented him.

“maybe,” he shrugged as he felt your arms release their grip on him. as you stepped back, he took in your appearance. you had grown up slightly since he’d watched you board a plane and leave him behind, but the years had been good to you.

“congrats on the win by the way,” you said, suprised at how the nerves had melted away. so far, he was still the same sasha, and you’d always found it easy to talk to him.

“thank you,” he said shyly, humble as ever.

“where did you wanna go?” you asked.

“do you want to get coffee?”

“sure,” you smiled. “lead the way, captain.”

•

you and sasha spent nearly three hours in the small coffee shop, catching up on anything you’d missed telling eachother over the phone, and repeating somethings you already had. neither of you minded, and when the barista let you guys know that they’d be closing up soon, you found yourself wishing you had more time.

just like in finland.

there was no one else in the coffee shop since it was late at night by now, and the soft music was quickly making you tired despite the caffeine in your system.

“i should take you home,” he offered, and then as if he read your mind, added. “i can pick you up tomorrow morning and take you to your car if you want.”

“sure - thank you,” he helped you put on your light jacket you had worn despite the florida heat, and you hesitated before slipping your hand into his as he walked beside you to his car, fingers interlocking.

once you were back at your hotel, you hesitated before getting out of the car.

“do you want to come up with me?” too scared to see his reaction, you looked down at your lap as you waited for his answer, but the sound of the engine shutting off made you lift you gaze and meet his eyes.

“i’d like that.”

•

you woke up to the feeling of sasha’s fingers tracing patterns on the bare skin of your shoulder, and cuddled closer into his chest as the sunlight crept in through a crack in the curtains.

“good morning,” he whispered.

“good morning,” you repeated, feeling the warmth of his arms wrapping around you, your legs tangled with his beneath the covers.

“i missed this,” he admitted, and you hummed in response.

“me too.”

he was silent for a moment, as if he was mustering up the courage to ask you his next question.

“do you ever wonder what things would be like if you had stayed in finland?”

you looked up at him, your eyes meeting.

“yeah, a lot actually,” you admitted. “sometimes i regret leaving.”

“you had to go,” he said, but you could tell that it had hurt him when you left. maybe as much as it had hurt you.

“it was one of the hardest things i ever did. leaving you.”

“we found eachother again though,” he replied, always finding a way to look at things in a positive light. reality set in as you realized the harsh truth.

“i’m only in florida for a few more days sasha,” you confessed, and you felt guilty. surely he knew that you had to leave again, but it still felt like you were doing something wrong.

“i know,” he assured you. “no one stays anywhere forever.” you knew he hadn’t meant it with any hostility.

“do you like it here in florida?” you asked, trying to shift the subject off of you leaving. “it’s so different from home.”

“it’s very different, but it’s nice.” he agreed, and while he knew when you called finland home you meant his, but there was a time when you called it home as well, even if you were just a guest there.

“yeah, it’s really nice,” you agreed.

“will you visit again?” he asked the question you had been dreading.

“i don’t know when i’ll be able to,” you said honestly. “but i’ll try, sasha.”

he smiled, placing a kiss on your forehead.

“we play in your hometown next month,” he remembered aloud, and you smiled, knowing you would see him again sooner than you imagined.

“i’ll have to get a ticket,” you smiled at him.

“i think i can help with that.”

disclaimer: all screenshots, events, and/or interactions depicted in this are a work of fiction. i have no association with any parties mentioned

[daffythefox]

i love my boyfriend. we talked and the devaluation thing is no longer happening rn. so that's good! also vacation is great, talking to one of my friends and hanging out! cant wait tho to go back to hanging out with the man i am mentally ill abt, tho.

[prettyfastcars]

Darkest little paradise | Mob!Lewis

Summary: You and Lewis are childhood best friends. You know him better than anyone, and you’re one of the few people he actually trusts fully. But Lewis has been keeping secrets from you. And when you find out exactly what he's been hiding, nothing is ever the same again. 

Themes: mob!lewis, angst, smut, possessive!lewis, virgin!reader, fluff, slight degrading kink, explicit language, slightly dark!mob!lewis, friends to enemies to lovers ish

Out of all places, he didn’t expect to find you out on your balcony drinking by yourself. 

Lewis had received a phone call from your very worried father earlier, the latter told him that you weren’t picking up any calls, and asked him to check on you to see what was wrong. Your parents were travelling and they were worried about you being alone when they suspected that you were upset. 

Lewis was confused as to why you didn’t reach out to him if you were really upset. Usually you texted him regarding every minor happening throughout the day. 

“Hey, princess,” He called out gently, stepping out onto the penthouse balcony to join you. “Your dad called me, he wanted me to see how you were doing. Everything… alright?”  

Dumb question, he knew. Of course nothing was alright if you were out here drinking alone. You looked like you had been crying too. Puffy red eyes, dried tears on your cheek. It was night time, and the city sparkled below like a shimmery tapestry. Yet you looked devastated, like you couldn’t even bring yourself to admire the citylights. 

The moment you looked up and met Lewis’ eyes, you felt like running into his arms and crying again. Lewis had always been your safe place. You two grew up together. Your families had been friends for decades. Your father and Lewis did business together, both of them powerful, feared, and respected in this city. But to you he was just your best friend. He was there right beside you for everything; school, high school, uni, graduation, vacations, all your good days and bad days, everything. 

But you knew you would feel dizzy if you got up so you remained seated on the lounge chair, sipping on more wine. You were one and a half bottles down. 

When you remained quiet, Lewis walked up to you and stood by the chair just watching you. He could tell you were a bit drunk, but the bottles of wine weren’t his main concern. 

He was more bothered by what you were wearing. 

Your families had been on enough vacations around the world for Lewis to have seen you in all sorts of swimwear. But right now, as you were dressed in nothing but dark red, lacy, see-through lingerie, it felt risqué and intimate. Thankfully you had a satin robe on, though it didn’t leave much to the imagination. It was driving Lewis insane. He had to clench his fists and take a deep breath in order to get his brain to function properly, and not be distracted by the amount of skin that you were showing. 

Did someone, other than him, see you like this? 

“Why are you dressed like that?” He tried his best to keep his displeasure hidden, but if you had been sober enough you would’ve surely caught the bitterness and jealousy in his voice. 

You looked up at him, and sighed. Everything seemed blurry in your drunken state. 

“You look so handsome,” You murmured, then chuckled humorlessly. “Were you out doing scary things while looking insanely good again?” You teased, and sipped on your wine again. He did look good, then again he always did. But right now, dressed in an all black suit, his braids tied into a low ponytail, his chains and rings… “Your nose stud looks extra sparkly tonight.” You commented, hiccuping after. 

Lewis let out a sigh, then shoved his hands in his pockets. “Why are you dressed like that? And why are you drinking alone? Did something happen?” He asked. 

That made you tear up again as his questions allowed the hurt to come flooding back in again. After a few seconds of silence, you answered, “I had a date tonight.” 

“What?” Lewis’ blood pumped faster than ever. 

You repeated, sounding more upset than earlier and on the verge of crying. “I had a date tonight.” 

He waited for you to give him more details, unsure of what to say. 

You continued, beginning to slur a little. “We were gonna have a cute date night. I made dinner, I got all dressed up,” You went to take another sip of wine but Lewis snatched your glass from you, and the look in his eyes told you that you weren’t getting that glass back. You sighed and resumed talking, “But he didn’t show up. I texted him, I called, I waited for an hour. Then his text came and he said he doesn’t feel like he’s ready for a relationship and what not.” 

“Well, at least he didn’t waste your time.” He said, trying to sound supportive. “If he didn’t like you, then–,” 

You cut him off, “I don’t care about being liked. I wanted him to fuck me.” 

Lewis froze again. His hand around the wine glass tightened to a point where he thought it might shatter but it didn’t. “Is that why you’re wearing that?” 

You rolled your eyes at him dramatically, “What do you think, Lew?” 

His hands were shaking. He didn’t know how to react to that. The two of you had been close all these years, but this was new territory. “Let’s get inside.” He said, already walking away expecting you to follow him. 

But you didn’t move. 

“What’s wrong with me?” You asked, making Lewis stop and turn around to face you again. Once you met his eyes again, you asked, “Why does this always happen to me?” You sniffled, wiping the tears that fell down your cheeks. “Am I not pretty enough?” 

Lewis sighed and walked over to where you sat. He placed the wine glass down and grabbed you by the arms, pulling you up. He kept an arm around you because he knew you’d be dizzy. “Who said you’re not pretty, princess?” 

You looked at him with teary eyes. “Then why doesn’t anyone want me?” 

He pulled you closer, looking at you with soft eyes. “Maybe he’s an idiot. Maybe he’s–,”

“But it’s not just him.” You sniffled, followed by a sob. “Everyone I’ve ever dated, they…” You hiccuped, “No one ever wants me. Everything feels great on the first dates, but then something always happens and they just… leave. Most of them never even tell me why, they just ghost me.” 

Lewis kept his poker face on as you wrapped your arms around him, finally feeling safe enough in his arms to cry your heart out. You sobbed, not worried about how your nearly naked body pressed up against him. You didn’t know you were driving him mad. 

“I just wanna feel wanted. And desired.” You cried on his shoulder, and he hugged you until your sobs fading into soft sniffles. “I want to experience things too, I deserve it, don’t I?” Lewis’ arms were warm around you, and that was all you needed. “I just wanna feel pretty.” 

“But you are pretty.” Lewis said, his voice soft and quiet. “You’re the prettiest girl I know.” 

You were quiet for a few moments, then said, “But even you don’t want me.” 

Lewis froze for a moment, then pulled away quickly, cupping your face so you’d look at him. “What’s gotten into you?” 

More tears fell down your face silently, Lewis wiped them away. This was way different than all the times he comforted you. There was a line you were both crossing here and you both knew that. 

“If we weren’t best friends, and if I’d let you–” 

“You’re drunk.” Lewis cut you off. 

But you continued, sniffling. “Would you? Would you want me, Lew? Am I pretty enough for you?” Before Lewis could answer, you grabbed his hand and guided it over to your chest. Another fell down your cheek. 

“Stop.” Lewis warned. 

“Please…” You whispered, placing his hand over the lacy material covering your breast. The warmth of his hand made you shiver. “I’d let you do anything.” Your voice dropped to a whisper. 

Lewis fought himself to remain in control. He could feel your racing heartbeats, your warmth and the softness of your skin. You were upset and hurting, and if he did anything, it would be wrong because clearly you weren’t thinking straight. 

One moment he was looking at you like he was in pain, and the next he pulled his hand away from your chest and wrapped it around your throat instead, making your eyes widen at the sudden rough movement. 

“Stop saying shit like that.” He hissed, in a lowered voice he had never used on you before. He tightened his grip around your neck just enough to have your full attention. “Now get inside, take this fucking outfit off of you and get some sleep.” His dark brown eyes stared into yours. “Stop acting like a needy brat, and do as I say.” 

With that he let go of you, pushing you away carefully. You wiped your tears and basically ran inside your penthouse. 

Lewis stayed out on the spacious balcony for a while longer, mainly to calm himself down but also waiting for his throbbing erection to calm down as well. Fuck. He wasn’t expecting that. 

After a while, Lewis walked back into your penthouse. He went straight into your bedroom and found you sulking in bed. Thank fuck you were not wearing that flimsy lacy thing anymore. It looked like you had had a shower as well. 

He grabbed a cold water bottle from your mini fridge and brought it over to you, sitting down on the edge of your bed as he handed it to you after taking the cap off. You accepted it quietly and took a few sips. 

He noticed you were avoiding his eyes. “Talk to me.” He said. He hated it whenever you two fought or argued, which you very rarely did. 

“I’m sorry.” You finally whispered, “I wasn’t thinking.” 

“I know. You don’t have to apologise.” He stood up, and said, “Look, I have to fly somewhere for work. I’ll see you back at your father’s house in a few days, okay?” 

Every fortnight Lewis and your dad got together to discuss business, and your families used that as an excuse for a get together each time. You nodded, still avoiding his eyes. 

“Hey,” Lewis bent down and tapped you on the nose playfully. “Don’t worry too much. Get some sleep, you need it.” 

He gave you a gentle kiss on the forehead, and didn’t leave until you gave him a faint smile back. 

—

Lewis couldn’t get that night out of his head. He was being plagued with what ifs. What if he had taken your offer? What if you two had slept together? Would you have woken up and regretted it? What would have happened if you found out that he was responsible for scaring away every man who ever tried to date you? Would you hate him? Would he lose you? 

No. He couldn’t lose you. You were his best friend. All he ever wanted was to keep you away from assholes who could never treat you right. One of those assholes being that guy who turned you down that night he found you drinking on the balcony. Lewis was the reason behind that text the guy sent you. 

He hated it, indirectly being the reason behind why you were upset after each failed relationship. 

Which is why he swore to never let you know what he did behind your back each time a man showed even the slightest bit of interest in you. He would never let you know how he stalked them. How he found every dirty secret about them and held it over their heads. How he often had to get physical and anonymously beat them up. How he followed and kept an eye on you from a distance each time you went on a date. 

But he couldn’t tell you the truth, could he? He couldn’t tell you that he was the one who threatened every boyfriend you’d ever had. He could tell you that he told them if they touched you, he would kill them. He couldn’t tell you that he had been doing that since you had your first boyfriend in high school. 

He had lost count of how many times he’d followed the men home and held his gun to their heads until they deleted your number and promised to leave the city. He hated that you got hurt in the process, each time. But this was necessary, wasn’t it? 

After all, you were his. Why should anyone else have you? 

He had waited his entire life for you to see him in that way. For you to realise that he was right there, and that he could treat you right. What sucked the most was that the first time you ever showed interest in him in that way, that night on the balcony, you were not sober at all. Lewis felt like an afterthought. And he hated it. 

But he was a patient man. He had waited years, and he would wait some more if that’s what it took for you to see him in that light. 

—

Your families, as per usual, got together at your father’s mansion for your biweekly lunch. Lunch and business talk were just excuses anyway. All of you just used the time to catch up, cook together, lounge by the pool, play games. And it always, always ended up becoming like a weekend getaway for everyone. 

Lewis looked forward to it, as he always did. Not to discuss business with your father but just to see you. When you were kids you two used to never sleep during these weekends. You’d build forts, and get lost in the hedge maze and play by the pool for hours. As you got older, playtime turned into movie nights. 

But this weekend, something was different. 

“Hi dad, hey Lewis!” You called out, looking happier than usual. Which Lewis found weird because less than a week ago you were drinking alone on your balcony, nursing a broken heart. 

Both men looked up at you, replying to your greeting from where they were sitting in your father’s office. But you breezed past them, disappearing down the hallway faster than Lewis could ask what had you in such a good mood. You were almost skipping. 

He made a mental note to ask you about it over lunch later. 

But he never got to do that since you were completely engrossed in your phone at the lunch table. And everyone kept talking to him and he had to reply to them mindlessly all while his entire attention was on you. Especially since you kept smiling down at your phone. 

A multitude of possibilities crossed his mind. And he hated every single one that had to do with you being involved with another man. He decided he’d confront you about it later. 

–

By the time Lewis managed to get to alone to talk to you, it was already night time. He’d missed dinner because he had important phone calls to take. And by the time he returned back to the dining room, everyone was drunk and you had already left. 

So here he was now, waiting for you in your bedroom. When you were younger, Lewis used to make fun of you for having an all pink room. After all, your father’s mansion was a behemoth, Georgian style mansion, complete with luxurious dark interior, all except your girly pink room. 

So then one day you got tired of his teasing and demanded an all black and gold room. You were fifteen then, and now many years later, the room hadn’t changed one bit. 

Lewis was looking around, noticing everything that hadn’t changed in many years, when you walked in. Still with that big smile on your face. 

“Oh hey Lew, ready for movie night?” You closed the door behind you and began dimming the lights, already searching for the TV remote. “Should we watch a musical?”

Meanwhile Lewis was standing there, in the middle of your room, looking all confused. Finally he asked, “What is going on with you?”

You kept lifting the cushions on the sofas, looking under them to find the remote as you mindlessly asked, “What do you mean?” 

“Stop.” He called out, wanting your attention. “Look at me!” 

That tone of his made you stop. This was the second time he’d used that voice on you now. The first time was that night he found you drinking alone. 

You turned to face him. You were used to this, him standing in your childhood bedroom, wearing nothing but his usual sweatpants, braids untied. Lewis had always been handsome, yet right now as he looked at you with a strange anger in his eyes, you couldn’t focus on anything else. 

“What is it?” You asked, leaning against the sofa for support as Lewis’ eyes stared deep into your soul. He was your best friend, but you had seen the way he worked. You knew why he was so feared and respected. Lewis could be intense sometimes. 

“You just seem…,” He crossed his arms over his chest, “Happy. All of a sudden. I mean, I found you heartbroken on your balcony just a few days ago and now you’re basically skipping with joy all over the place.” He said it like it was the most odd thing he’d ever seen. 

“Oh Lewis,” You chuckled. “Maybe I am happy.” You said, moving away from the sofa and stepping closer to him. “I wasn’t gonna sit and let a man decide if he wanted me or not. I thought maybe I should take matters into my own hands and, you know, get out and find what I want on my own.” 

Lewis frowned. “What does that mean?” His heart began racing again. He’d been away these last few days, and he was just now realising that you had barely texted him at all. 

You avoided his eyes with a coy smile and said, “My girlfriends and I went clubbing the other night,” You looked up at him with a mischievous smirk, “And there was this guy, and he seemed really nice, and…” You trailed off, smirking some more, “Well, you know, we kind of hooked up in his car and–,” 

One moment you were talking, and the next Lewis had you pinned to the nearest wall. His tattooed hand wrapped around your throat, keeping you in place as he leaned in with a murderous look in his eyes. 

“Who the fuck touched you?” He whispered, looking like he was trying really hard to keep his anger contained. “Just give me a name, and I swear I will–,” 

“So it was you.” You cut him off this time, your voice shaky and your eyes beginning to tear up. 

Lewis frowned. 

“This whole time, you’re the one making decisions about my life.” You watched how his face fell when he realised that you figured it out. “You had no right, Lewis.” 

“Yes I did.” He argued, leaning closer. “Now tell me who the fuck touched you?” 

You hated him at that moment. But his scent was familiar, his touch was warm as always. He was still that person who held you each time you crumbled down. He was still your best friend, but you were angry. 

“No one did. I had a theory, I wanted to see if it was true so I lied.” You sighed. “I never went clubbing, I didn’t hook up with anyone.” You explain. “ You know, I always wondered why you never seemed bothered like a true friend would each time I came crying to you about how I got stood up, ignored, or ghosted.” You scoffed, “Turns out it was you who hurt me each time.” You accused. “Why couldn’t you let me be with who I wanted?” 

“No one was ever good enough for you.” He whispered, his face just inches away from yours. 

“That’s not for you to decide, Lewis!” You sniffled, then raised your voice. “I’m an adult, I can be with whoever I want to be. I can sleep with whoever I want to–,” 

“No.” He said calmly, like he was stating facts. “You’re mine. They don’t get to touch you.” 

You struggled against him, and he loosened his grip around your neck a little but pressed his body against yours, keeping you trapped between himself and your bedroom wall. “I thought you cared.” You whispered. “Thought you wanted me to be happy.” 

Lewis pressed his forehead against yours, his other hand holding you at your waist. “You will be happy. You’ll be the happiest girl in this world.” He added, gently. “With me.” 

The audacity in his voice pissed you off. You shoved at his chest, managing to only push him an inch or two away. You forgot just how physically strong he was, but you were too angry to care. 

“I decide who I want to be happy with!” You yelled at his face. The mansion was big enough that no one else would hear you two arguing. “You don’t own me like you think you do!” 

Lewis chuckled, in that arrogant way of his, with his nose in the air. “You are mine.” 

“Why? Because you think so?” You scoffed, shaking your head at him. “What did you do to them anyway? Scare them off? Use them as punching bags? Throw them in your torture dungeons that I pretend don’t exist?” You never thought you’d ever say these words to him, but you didn’t care. He crossed a line. 

“Maybe.” He shrugged. “Maybe I did worse things, I had to get rid of so many boys I had to get creative.” Lewis gave you a dangerous smile, “You know I would do anything for you.” 

Those words, that voice, it sent shivers down your spine. “Lewis.” You warned, your brain seemed to just realise that this man was more than just your best friend. He was, after all, known for his ruthless ways. 

He smirked, stepping closer to you again. One hand on your waist, the other grabbing your chin and forcing you to look at him. His bare chest pressing against yours, only separated by the thin material of your PJ top. Your breathing got shaky, your brain got foggy. There was an unfamiliar tension in the air this time. It felt tangible the moment he easily shoved his thigh in between your legs. 

“What is it, princess? Now you’re scared of me?” He sounded cocky, and powerful. 

You stared into his big brown eyes. “I hate you.” You said, lying to his face. His handsome face. Flawless, like the rest of him. 

“Why?” Lewis smirked, “Because I kept assholes who would waste your time away from you? I’d say I did my duty as your friend. Isn’t that what friends do? Protect each other? Hmm?” 

You hated how he talked to you in that condescending tone. Mostly you hated how that tone made your body tingle. “I’ll tell my dad what you did.” You realised that only made you sound naïve. 

Lewis chuckled, “He’ll just think you’re throwing one of your bratty fits.” 

“I hate you, Lewis.” You repeated. 

“Oh you do?” He raised an eyebrow at you, mocking you. “I’ll believe you when you stop humping my thigh like that.” 

Your face burned when you realised that you’d been grinding on his thigh without thinking ever since he shoved it in between your legs. You froze and tried to push him away again but he wouldn’t let you. 

“Where are you going?” He said as you struggled against him. “What about this?” He pointed at the damp patch you left behind on his thigh. Your face burned even more as you looked at it. “Won’t you let me take care of that for you? Clearly your pussy is crying for attention.” 

“I don’t want you to touch me.” You didn’t sound convincing at all when you said it. 

That look in his eyes, his soft lips, the familiar scent of his, all that golden skin on display, the tattooed, rough hand holding your face… he was making it hard for you to think straight. And he knew. Judging by that smug look on his face, you could tell he knew. 

“Oh?” He taunted. “I remember perfectly well how just a couple of nights ago you almost begged me to fuck you.” He teased, “You even said you’d let me do anything to you.” He chuckled dangerously, like a villain. “Bet you would’ve even gotten on your knees and begged for me properly if I asked you to. You were that desperate for some cock in you. Do you remember that, princess?” 

His words made you breathless. On one hand he had crossed some boundaries, on the other he was giving you exactly what you craved, making you feel wanted and desired in his own dark, twisted ways. 

When he pressed his body against yours even more, you could feel something hard pressing against your abdomen. You gasped, looking into his eyes which were filled with a kind of hunger you had never seen before. It made you want to clench your thighs together, but with his legs in between yours, you couldn’t. 

“You feel that?” He rolled his hips in a way that made you very aware of his erection. “This is what I had to deal with for years whenever I was around you, always hoping and waiting you’d see that we belong together.” He confessed. 

“Lewis…” You couldn’t recognise your voice, it was so full of desire and need. But then you remembered what he did, and it felt like you sobered up and broke out of whatever trance he had you under. “You hurt me. For years.” 

“I did it for your own good,” He stated. “For us, can’t you see that?” 

“What you did was selfish.” You hissed, you placed your hands on his chest to push him away but the warmth of his skin made you pause. You could feel his heartbeats under your palms and just for a moment, you let your hands wander. Trailing up and down his toned abs, fingers tracing his tattoos. “It was mean,” You whispered bitterly, “Friends don’t treat each other like that.” Your actions didn’t match the way you reprimanded him. 

“I don’t want to be your friend.” He spat. 

“Neither do I.” You retorted. “Not after this bullshit of yours.” 

“You don’t get to push me away like that.” He grabbed you by the hips and pressed you even harder against him. 

You snapped, “You don’t get to make decisions about my life.” 

You opened your mouth to berate him some more, but he shut you up by pressing his mouth to yours, kissing you rough and hard like he hated you. 

You couldn’t control your hands anymore, you wanted to touch him and feel his warm, muscular body under your fingertips. You moaned into the kiss as his tongue slipped past your lips, stroking the top of your mouth while his hands slipped under your shirt, sliding up till he cupped your breasts, squeezing them in his large hands until you moaned even louder. 

His touch made you wild, enough for you to bite on his full lower lip until he hissed. Your hands sliding up and down his muscular chest, feeling every hard muscle. Fuck. He felt good. 

Flashes of that night filled your brain again, how you begged him to fuck you. And how he didn’t. A rush of anger took over you. 

“Why do you have to be so fucking moody?” You whispered against his mouth, as you pulled away to catch your breath. “If this is all you wanted then why didn’t you fuck me when I asked you to?” 

He smirked at the sudden dominance in your voice. “You mean when you begged me to?” 

“Shut the fuck up.” You snarled. 

Your words made him smirk as he looked down at you with lust in his pretty, warm brown eyes. How had you missed the way he looked at you all these years? 

“Oh? You’re using your big girl words now.” He taunted, mocking you with that smug smirk of his. “Admit it, you’re angry and you still want me to fuck you.”  

You were about to sass back at him but he grabbed your hand, moving it down his body, mimicking how you made him touch you that night. Lewis made you slide your hand past the waistband of his sweatpants, slowly, holding your stare as he had you wrap your hand around his erected cock. 

You breathed heavily now, lips parted as you looked up at him while instinctively giving him a gentle squeeze. He frowned and groaned like he hadn’t been touched in forever, “Fuck, princess…” 

You’d be lying if you said you didn’t almost forgive all his wrongs right there and then. Lewis let out some more strained moans when you slowly slid your closed fist up and down his cock, feeling it throb and twitch in your hand. You watched his face carefully. How he clenched his jaw, and closed his eyes, how his frown deepened when you explored and teased him with your hand. 

“Lewis…” You didn’t realise you were panting in need as you touched him. 

He opened his eyes and stared into yours. His hand wrapped around your neck again, hard enough to make you gasp in pleasure and pain. “Tell me you want me,” He leaned in to whisper in your ear, kissing along your jaw occasionally. “Beg me to fuck you like you did that night.” 

“I begged.” You chuckled this time, squeezing your hand around his cock again, enjoying the sounds he made. “You had the chance, and you didn’t fucking take it. Now, what if I don’t want you anymore?” 

Lewis scoffed and placed his mouth back on yours. Kissing you like he was hungry for it, biting your already swollen mouth. “Is that so? Shall we check, then?” 

He barely gave you time to think before he dipped his hands down your shorts, into your underwear until he felt the wetness gathering in between your legs. You shivered, moaning into the messy kiss as he moved his fingers around. 

He smirked, pulling away to look at you, holding your stare while his fingers gently inspected your wetness, teasing you, bringing you on the verge of begging for more. “That doesn’t feel like you don’t want me, princess.” 

You hated that mocking tone of his. It made you want to scratch at him like a feral cat. “Fuck you.” You hissed, unable to do much now that his finger threatened to slide deep inside you with how he kept toying with you. 

“Alright,” He pulled his hand away, “Come here then.” 

Lewis pulled you away from the wall and easily pushed you down on your bed, standing at the end of the bed to watch you for a moment. You watched him too. He looked like a fucking god. A muscular, heavily tattooed, handsome god. 

You almost gulped when you noticed he was eyeing you like you were the sacrifice left on his altar. Like he was ready to satiate his hunger. 

“You’re just gonna stare?” You couldn’t help the bratty words from leaving your mouth. Mainly because you knew that would get him moving. Having him just standing there watching you like that was painful because you wanted him so bad. 

Lewis crawled on top of you, grabbed you by the neck and said, “If you want my cock, you’re gonna ask nicely. Understood?” 

You glared at him, “I fucking hate how bossy you are.” You spat at him, already squirming under him. 

“And I hate how bratty you are.” He said, straddling your waist as he tore your shirt off your body, throwing it behind him. 

With no bra on, you instinctively went to hide your body from him. But Lewis grabbed your hands and pinned it above your head, securing your wrists in his one hand while the other cupped your breast. 

“You don’t have to hide from me, princess.” He whispered, kissing along your exposed neck. “It’s just me.” He playfully nipped at your neck and you moaned and squirmed under him, your brain already malfunctioning at his brief touch. 

“Don’t think that I’ve…” You gasped when he kissed around your ear, “forgiven you.” You whispered, breathless already, with shivers dancing down your spine. 

“Really?” He whispered, kissing his way down your body until he took one of your breasts into his mouth, kneading the other with his hand. He bit, and sucked on your skin, making your back arch off the bed as you whined in pleasure. “Haven’t you?” 

Your hips moved on their own, in a way they never had before. You were desperate for more, but were too proud to ask for it. Lewis lightly grazed your nipple with his teeth, and you let out a loud moan. One which made you want to hide your face in embarrassment after it escaped your mouth. 

“No, and I never will…” You muttered under your breath, still whining in pleasure as he played with your body. 

Lewis smirked as his hand reached down in between your legs. He lowered your shorts and underwear until you could easily slide your legs out of them. Your desperation was showing and he couldn’t stop smirking. 

You wanted to slap it off his pretty face. But you didn’t. You watched how he spread your trembling legs apart and settled in between them. You gasped in surprise when he lowered his face down until his mouth was inches away from your clit. 

This was new to you, and it made you a little nervous. 

He could tell. 

“Keep your legs right there for me.” He grabbed your thighs and parted your legs even more. “Now stay still, don’t move.” He whispered against your skin as he kissed your inner thighs. His warm breath caused goosebumps to erupt all over your skin. He looked up at you and smirked when he noticed it. 

You held yourself up on your elbows, looking down at him in anticipation. 

“No one else is gonna touch you like this, you hear me?” He leaned down, kissing your wet folds, his tongue slowly circling around your throbbing clit and licking down, parting your wet folds with ease. 

You shivered as you felt his tongue stroking your most sensitive parts. No one had ever even gotten close to touching you there. Lewis made damned sure of that after all. All so he could have all of you. 

“You taste better than I imagined…” Lewis chuckled as he looked up at you and found you with your eyes shut, head thrown back in pleasure. “You have no idea how long I’ve dreamt of this.” 

He wrapped his big arms around your thighs, keeping you in place and close to him. He placed his mouth back on you again, and licked in between your legs, making you whine as he tasted you. 

“Oh fuck, please…” You cried out, whimpering and begging. 

“Beg for it.” He whispered against your wet skin, making you hiss in pleasure. “Beg me to make you come.” 

You could feel your wetness trickling out of you, one drop at a time. Of course you had masturbated before but it never felt this good. No toy ever came close to how good his tongue felt slowly fucking in and out of you. 

You tried to grind on his face to make yourself come. But Lewis pulled away smirking each time. 

“Please,” You whined, giving in finally and unable to take his sweet torture anymore. “Lewis…” You pleaded, “Please make me come.” You could feel your legs shaking under his touch. “Please…” 

He almost wanted to tease you for a bit longer, but even he was getting impatient and wanted to fuck you as soon as he could. So he wrapped his arms around your thighs, securing you in his grip as he pushed his face further into you, fucking you with his soft, warm tongue until you were crying out loud, coming all over his mouth. 

You were gasping for air, your body squirming under him as you came. 

“You did so good, princess.” Lewis kissed his way up your body again until he pressed his mouth back on yours, kissing you just as hungrily as before. His braids tickled your face but nothing else had your attention in that moment. Not when his hands rubbed up and down your sides. Not when he lowered down just enough for you to feel his body weight, and feel his clothed erection right in between your legs. 

You had never been this intimate with anyone before, and just feeling his warm skin rubbing against yours had your mind going crazy. You moaned into his mouth, breathless from his kiss as his hand lowered his sweatpants just enough to free his erected cock again. 

You couldn’t help but whine as he rubbed the tip of his cock up and down your wet slit. You squirmed under him, seeking more of that feeling. 

Lewis pulled away from the messy kiss and looked down at you, supporting himself above you on one elbow. You had never seen him from this angle before. You couldn’t help but reach out to touch his face, because as angry as you were deep down, he was still your best friend. Still your favourite person in the whole world. 

And yet, he had been secretly hurting you thinking he was doing you good all these years. You couldn’t help the tears that fell down on either side of your face as you gently ran a finger across his perfect eyebrow. Damn him. Everything about him was perfect. 

“I hate you.” Was all you could whisper, feeling too much all at once. Anger. Betrayal. Desire. Need. Satisfaction. 

He smirked, pressing the tip of his cock against your hole and applied just enough pressure to make you moan without pushing inside you yet. “You can hate me while you’re being fucked by me, I don’t care.” 

Neither did you. Not when he slowly pushed inside of, stretching you open as he went. Filling you up until you couldn’t think once he was snug inside you. Fuck. It was too much. Too good. You couldn’t look away from him, more tears spilling down your face once he was fully in. 

Out of all the emotion you were feeling, the stab of betrayal hurt the most. After all, your best friend had been lying to you. Comforting you all these years while you felt insecure when he was the reason behind it. 

“Why didn’t you just tell me?” You asked. 

He knew what you were referring to. “I didn’t want to lose you.” He sounded just as breathless as you were. It was hard to hold back from wanting to fuck you like he dreamt of doing all these years. But he didn’t want it to hurt. So he was waiting, waiting for you to adjust to his size. “I couldn’t risk it.”

You moaned as he removed himself entirely, slowly, before pushing back into you. He was trembling with how much he had to hold back. You could tell. For a man of his magnitude, it was a given that being gentle wasn’t necessarily his forte. But he was still trying. 

“You’re so selfish.” You stated, even when you wrapped your arms around his shoulders, holding onto him as he fucked you slowly, as slow as possible. Letting you feel every inch of him moving in and out of you. It was so good it was agonising. 

“No,” He argued, still moving gently. “You know what would be selfish? If I asked your father for your hand in marriage behind your back. He would’ve approved of it, he loves me like a son and everyone knows that.” He kissed the side of your face. “But I gave you a choice, I was waiting for you to choose me. Getting rid of the competition all along was just… fun.” 

“Oh fuck you, Lewis.” You almost bit down on his shoulder when he tried to speed up a little. 

“You’re too tight, baby.” He whispered, kissing your face again. “Open for me. Let me fuck you, come on…” You heard him swear under his breath again, the warmth of his body on top of yours felt so good you never wanted this to end. 

Your heart raced even as you relaxed your body to let him in, to let him fuck you harder until fresh tears fell down your face. 

Lewis kissed your open mouth as you moaned for him, crying out loud each time his cock brushed against all the right spots inside you. “You’re all fucking mine,” He whispered, wrapping his hand around your throat again, “Is this what you wanted? Hmm? To be fucked like this?” He taunted. “Is this what you were begging for? You feel pretty now, princess?” 

His cocky words made you want to slap him but he felt too good for you to actually do it and risk him stopping. Instead, you carefully lifted your legs up and wrapped them around his waist, allowing him to thrust deeper into you. 

Lewis leaned down and pressed his forehead to yours while fucking deeper into you. The simple gesture felt too intimate. You were in sync, bodies moving as one, sharing the same breath, hearts racing, you felt connected. 

The more you moaned and whimpered, the more you felt him losing his ability to be gentle. At some point, he gave up completely and just fucked you relentlessly. 

You felt a familiar pressure forming in between your hips, your body begging for release. He could feel it too given how you clenched around him. 

“Already about to come for me, princess?” He chuckled, “That was quick.” You didn’t miss the arrogant tone in his voice. 

“Lewis… please.” You moaned, begging. 

“No.” 

His one word felt like it made your world come crumbling down. You cried out when he pulled out, right when you were mere seconds away from coming. 

Even he was surprised at how he was able to hold back from just fucking into you until you were both completely spent from coming too much. 

Lewis leaned in to kiss your swollen mouth. “You tortured me for years, princess.” He whispered against your mouth. “You don’t get to come that easily.” He pulled away and said, “Turn around for me.” 

You moved too slowly for his liking so he had to intervene. He pulled you onto your knees by your hips, shoving your face down into your soft pillow as he shoved his cock inside you again. 

His hand found its way to your front and he pressed the palm against your lower abdomen while he fucked into you. He liked how he could feel himself deep inside you with each thrust. And he liked how you clenched around his cock. 

“You feel me in here, princess?” He whispered, “You’re mine now, no one else is gonna touch you. Ever.” 

You moaned as he sped up when you least expected it. There was nothing to do but take it, take him deep inside you each time he filled you up. 

His hand travelled all the way to your throat and he choked you gently. It felt dirtier now that you couldn’t see him. He squeezed enough to make you lose your mind.

“Fuck! Please, Lewis….” You cried, your body moving forward and back with each thrust of his. You clenched the blanket under you in your fists tightly, biting down onto the pillow as he quickened his pace. 

“Are you going to come for me, baby?” He asked, his voice deeper now. “Are you going to be mine forever?” 

“Yes…” Your voice sounded muffled. “Yes, please…” 

“Promise?” 

“Oh damn you! Yes!” 

He chuckled, leaning down to press his chest to your back as he fucked into your harder than earlier. “Come for me, princess. Come all over my cock.” 

You came undone, hard and fast, moaning as you did. You had never imagined pleasure could be so blinding. Your brain was a foggy mess. You felt like you were floating. 

Lewis came right after you, groaning as he did. 

Both of you collapsed onto your bed, both catching your breaths and trying to calm your racing hearts. You could feel Lewis’s body heat right on top of you. 

Everything was blurry for a while after that. You briefly remember Lewis cleaning you up and placing the covers over you. 

When you came to again, you were laying almost entirely on top of his chest. Your ear right over his heart, which beat steadily now. His warm hand rubbed up and down your back. The room was dark now, all the lights were off. 

You wouldn’t see him but you still moved to look up at him. Or at least you tried to but the soreness in between your legs made you hiss in discomfort. 

“Sorry about that.” Lewis said quietly. You could hear the smug smile he was probably hiding. 

“I still hate you, Lewis. You piece of shit.” You muttered under your breath, placing your head back on his comfy chest. Your fingers traced over his skin, you knew exactly where all his tattoos were so you traced them even in the dark. 

“Sure.” He chuckled this time. “Didn’t sound like you hated me earlier. You screamed so loud I was worried we might have woken up the whole house.” 

Your face burned. You still couldn’t believe you actually did it. You slept with your best friend. It felt unreal. You tried to find that anger again, but it wasn’t there anymore. 

You still had one question. “Did you truly ever consider doing it? What you said earlier?” Your heart skipped a beat or two while you waited for an answer. 

Lewis was quiet for a moment then asked, “What exactly? I said a lot of things.” 

“Ask dad for my hand in marriage. Behind my back.” 

His silence said it all. 

“Asshole.” You muttered under your breath again. 

He laughed, tightening his arms around you protectively. “You love me, princess. You would’ve pretended to hate the thought of it. You would’ve thrown a bratty fit. But in the end, you would’ve said yes.” Then he paused and added, “You will say yes when time comes.” 

You hide your face into his chest even in the dark. Your silence said it all too.

[guksfairy]

word count: 1k

notes: JK is 22, OC is 21, Tsuki is Jungkook’s sister, secret relationship, mentions of a nsfw Polaroid, I love them 💕 (not proof read yet!)

♡︎♡︎♡︎♡︎♡︎♡︎

Best Friend’s Older Brother JK who happened to always be around when you come over to hang out with his sister, Tsuki, even though he had a job and was an active final year university student

Best Friend’s Older Brother JK who would keep a constant eye on you two so the second Tsuki would step out of a room he’d make his way to you and grab your waist before kissing you with all his might telling you how much he misses and needs you

Best Friend’s Older Brother JK who knows your whereabouts 24/7 and consistently confuses Tsuki when he’s aware where you’re at but she doesn’t

“Ugh Y/N left her work jacket here. I’m gonna go to her place before she goes in,” Tsuki, grabbing her keys, making her way to the front door is stopped when her brother answers, “She’s already working,” nonchalantly while cutting up some fruit he craved.

Tsuki stood frozen with her hand on the door knob before slowly turning back to face Jungkook with her eyebrows furrowed.

“What?”

With a subtle panic Jungkook quickly fixes his composure and replies, “Uh I ran into her earlier and she told me she was called in to cover someone’s last hour,” avoiding eye contact he clears his throat hoping it’s enough for his sister to not ask him anything else.

“Okay well regardless I’m still gonna take it to her and probably grab a bite to eat. You want anything?” Jungkook shakes his head waiting for the second Tsuki walks out the door to run to his phone and text you.

Koo 💕: baby my sister is on her way to your work

Koo 💕: just take off my sweater before she gets there sweetheart

Best Friend’s Older Brother JK who lies to his entire family before going on their annual family vacation that he was feeling a little under the weather in order for his parents and sister to leave him home alone. His parents and Tsuki reluctantly leaving him alone with little worry. Tsuki texting you the day of.

Tsuki my baby🤍: hey babe you think you can go check in on Jk later today? He’s not feeling the hottest 😕

Your phone pings moving your attention from your boyfriends’ lips to your screen. Reading the text makes you giggle peaking your sweet Jungkook’s attention as he reads the screen. If only his sister knew the second his family’s car was out of view he had already called you to come over with a duffel bag full of clothes enough for 4 days and 3 nights.

Best Friend’s Older Brother JK who carries a Polaroid he took of you in quite the intimate moment. You laying on his bed on your back, his cock clearly deep in you with your face showing nothing but pleasure.

“Pleaseee I just want an energy drink!” Tsuki begging Jungkook for the nth time to buy her a drink. She didn’t have the best sleep the night before due to staying up all night trying to finish a paper she put off until the last minute. Her brother refusing to because “energy drinks aren’t good for you”.

“I’ll buy. I’m craving some gummy bears,” you’re heard from the back seat as Jungkook parks the car in front of the store.

“Really?” Tsuki’a face lighting up with joy before her brother takes out his wallet handing it to you.

“It’s fine. Here,” his sister staring awkwardly at his hand extended to you instead of his own blood relative before snatching it making him panic.

“Give it back,” his tone was supposed to be stern but his sister unbuckles her seatbelt before leaving the car with the promise of grabbing your desired snack as well.

“Are you trying to be obvious baby?” you giggle hitting his shoulder lightly.

“Sweetheart I suggest you chase after Tsuki right now and grab my wallet,”

“What? Why? She’s just gonna get snacks,”

“Your Polaroid is in there,”

“The one you took of us at our picnic date?” already in a slight panic you get ready to catch up to your friend.

“No, the one where I’m fucking you raw,��� he says it like it’s almost nothing before laughing when you whine his name and get out of the car as fast as you could to get your boyfriend’s wallet out of his sister’s grip.

Best Friend’s Older Brother JK who pokes the inside of his cheek when his sister tries to talk you into a date with a guy from her graphic design class.

“Oh he’s so dreamy! Besides you need some,” she stirs the pancake mix she’s preparing for her best friend and brother.

Her brother, with his eyes on his phone screen, trying to block out his sister’s intention of setting up his girlfriend with another guy. Clearly not being able to when he slams him phone on the table placing all his attention to your conversation.

“Why don’t you date him then?” Jungkook says before you could even answer her previous suggestion.

“No. Seongmin is cute but he’d be way better with Y/N. I mean he did ask for your name last week when you walked me to class,” she smiles and winks at you before turning to the stove ready to make the delicious breakfast.

“He did?” your response made Jungkook look at you clearly reading why do you care?

“He did! Oh Y/N you’re so getting a boyfriend,” your friends excitement was cute but your boyfriend who had a pout on his cute face made you melt.

“I don’t think I need one,” getting up from your chair you give a quiet kiss to Jungkook’s temple and make your way to help Tsuki.

Jungkook’s cheek a shade of pink while his pout disappears and is replaced with a cheeky smile.

[satorusugurugurl]

Aloe Vera

Summary: When on vacation with your boyfriend, things are great, the drinks, the sex, and the pool. What wasn't great, was the sunburn? But you're dating the strongest sorcerer of the modern age! He’ll take good care of you!

Characters: Gojo Satoru x FAB!Reader

Word Count: 1,408

Warnings: language, sunburn (please wear sunscreen!) fluff~!

A/N: As someone who lives in the desert, this happens a lot. My S.O was sweet enough to rub aloe on me last week, thus my muse!

“Oooh fuck me.” You whine, shuffling into the bathroom. “Fuuuuck me.”

Satoru is right behind you, towel wrapped around his neck, sunglasses pushing his bangs out of his face. “I told you to put on sunscreen! But nooo, somebody stayed by the pool because someone wanted to live, laugh, and work on her tan.”

Your boyfriend was right; you had said those exact words to him earlier that day. When he specifically tried to get you to put more sunscreen on. You had a shirt for him and that you were fine. The sunscreen you put on four hours prior was waterproof, as you floated in a donut.

But the sunscreen had to be reapplied every four hours. If you had taken the time to read the bottle, you think you would know. You really should have listened to your boyfriend. But you were so excited that summer was just around the corner; the only sound you wanted to listen to was the sound of margaritas being made and beach balls bouncing.

If your skin ever felt like skin again, you would listen to whatever the sunscreen bottle and your boyfriend told you to do.

Your skin was so burnt it wasn’t even funny. It was painful and hot; it hurt to move with every step you took towards the shower. Satoru winced, watching as you whimpered, stepping out of your swimsuit and turning the water to a lukewarm temperature.

You don’t even have a chance to step in as arms gently wrap around you. Satoru intended it to be a comforting gesture. Instead, it had you jolting in pain as the cloth of your boyfriend's jacket rubbed against your burnt, sensitive skin. Your yelp had him pulling back, arms held out in front of him.

“F-Fuck baby! I’m sorry!”

“N-no, it’s okay, it’s fine, I-I’m just going to sit here and suffer for all eternity.” Satoru doesn’t say anything as you step into the water. You try to hold back the cries of pain that threaten to pass through your lips, but Gojo can still hear them. The tiny, pained whines have him wincing along with you. He hated seeing you in pain and regretted not making you put on more sunscreen. If he had been more stern with you, then maybe he wouldn’t be in the position that you are right now. But it wasn’t like he could go back in time. You had neglected to put on more sunscreen, and he had failed to pin you down on the pool deck and rub it all over your stupidly cute face. He could not go back in time to change the outcome.

There was, however, one thing he could do.

“Hey, I’m going to step out for a little bit. I need to run to the store in the lobby and grab a couple of things. Are you going to be okay?”

A pained yes is all he hears before you slowly sink to the shower floor, allowing the cold water to run over your burnt skin. Gojo wastes no time; the second who knew you would be okay on your own for a bit, he was bolting out of your hotel room and running down to the hotel store.

You shower to your best abilities without being in excruciating pain. Skipping on the rag and the loofah, you gently wash your body with your hands, which still hurts. You made a vow to yourself with the showerhead that you would never forget to reapply your sunscreen again. Even if you were to fail, your boyfriend wouldn’t.

For the time being, the only thing you could do was try to relax, even though it felt like you wanted to peel your skin off of your body. After your shower, you shuffle back into the main room, collapsing onto the bed, bare butt naked, enjoying the cool crisp sheets underneath you. Between your still-wet skin and the air conditioning, You felt some form of comfort as the hotel room door opened.

At first, you jumped, searching for anything to cover your skin, but quickly, the door shut a second later, and you heard the wrinkling of a plastic bag heading further into the room. “Toru?” You call down gently, lifting your head to search for your boyfriend.

“It’s me; you weren’t doing anything naughty, were you?” he teases, even though he knew the only thing you could do was cry in pain from the sunburn that covered most of your body. Having sex like this was out of the question.

“If by naughty you mean laying my naked ass on our bed, then yes, I am being naughty.”

You can hear his running footsteps just before his shadow spreads on the bed before you. For a second, you think that he’s going to wolf whistle or fist pump or even make some crude comment about how sexy you look naked on his bed, and he didn’t even have to ask you to do anything. Instead of crude comments, the bed dips under his weight as he flops near you.

One second, you're lying there in silence, and the next second, a cold jelly-like substance is squeezed on your back. Said jelly instantly eases the burn on your back, making you moan softly as Satoru’s hands gently rub the cooling, earthy-smelling liquid over your irritated skin. The contrast of cool against your burning skin felt magical. The pain subsided from a persistent throbbing or a mild sting.

“Mmm, Toru, that feels good~” You smile happily, “Thank you, baby.”

“You're welcome, sweetheart. Just remember this moment when I'm lathering sunscreen on you from now on.”

You scoff as Satoru rolls you onto your back so he can rub aloe vera over the front of your body. “Oh please, you think I’m ever going to get this burnt again?”

“You won't once I lather you up in sunscreen.”

“I just wanted to get a little tanner to give off goddess vibes.”

“Babe, you already do that.” The way your eyes widen and glimmer at his words makes Satoru fight the urge to pat himself on the back. “My sunburnt goddess.” He admires the lighter skin tones from where your swimsuit was to the darker tones of your sunburn. God, your skin was so pretty, even when it was burnt.

“Oh, haha, asshole. Sunburnt Goddess, my ass.”

“It's true; allow me to lather you in aloe vera and fan you with a palm tree leaf.”

You rub your face against the sheets. “But of course, my devote ivory follower~”

“Heeey, why am I the ivory follower?”

“Have you seen your pasty ass?”

Your boyfriend's hands stop their treading as he sputters in shock. “Pasty ass?! Pasty!?” You laugh out loud, lifting your head to look up at him. “I do not have a pasty ass!”

“I'm sure the astronauts in the space station can see your pasty ass when you're naked,” Gojo grumbles, digging in the bag and opening something. “The aliens can see your glorious ass from galaxies away. The honored one's ass, the strongest ass of the modern age.” Gojo perks up with a smirk, nodding as he slaps a cool patch on your forehead.

“Keep going, sweetheart~ I'm almost there~.”

You don't get any further as Gojo grabs one of his oversized t-shirts and carefully slips it on you. “Thank you, Satoru, for taking such good care of me, Satoru.” Your boyfriend grins, eyes shutting as he lies down next to you, teaching into his bag, handing you a popsicle.

“You're welcome, sweetheart.”

You both lick at your popsicles in the cool air of the hotel room. When a single thought crosses your eyes, wander over your boyfriend's exquisite body. “Hey Toru?” the man is sucking down on his popsicle like he was giving it the gluck-gluck-five thousand.

“Yeah?”

“Can you get sunburned with infinity?”

“Huh,” he blinked slowly, “I mean, the special grade curse Jogo didn't burn me—so I'm assuming not. Just another benefit of being the honored one.”

“The honored one with a pasty ass.” A smirk pulls at the corner of your mouth as Satoru chokes on his sugary treat.

Forever Tag List:

@darkstarlight82 @pandoness @nealeart @simp-plague @sugurubabe @chilichopsticks

[lemonlover1110]

𝐂𝐡𝐚𝐧𝐠𝐞𝐬

Satoru Gojo

[Chapter 22] Upset

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Pairing: Satoru Gojo x f!Reader

Discord +18 - Twitter - Ko-Fi

You’re not exactly on the best terms with Satoru when your vacation comes to an end. You try to act like you’re fine, but you can’t stand even looking at him. Perhaps you shouldn’t have asked for the reason why he left if you knew you couldn’t handle the truth. Everything with Satoru was doing great until you decided to ask that question. You knew you should’ve left it alone, but curiosity got the best of you.

Satoru knows that he messed up, he knew so long before but now you’re… Even colder towards him. He never really thought that was possible, but you’ve proved him wrong. Maybe it’s because now that he knows that you have a son together, you should communicate more, yet, you don’t talk about anything that doesn’t involve Ren. 

Lately that’s the only topic of conversation that he can have with you without you outright ignoring him– And about work of course. Satoru can’t even be mad at you for ignoring him because he knows that he fucked up badly. He thinks that maybe he shouldn’t have told you the truth, but if he keeps hiding stuff then your relationship will end up nonexistent.

“Hey.” He grabs your arm when you’re about to walk past him without saying a word. You glare at him, your look giving him a warning to let go of you. He does just as your eyes tell him. “My mom… Invited you to dinner.”

“Are you crazy? Why would I?” You don’t hold back on giving him attitude, he deserves it and you know he won’t do anything about it. You click your tongue, “You’ve lost your mind.”

“She just wants to see Ren.” He says, but it doesn’t change your mind about anything. You don’t care what she wants to do, she has to learn that she’s not entitled to your child.

“I love how you forgive her so easily. I know that if I was in your situation…” You begin but you end up biting your tongue. He made the right decision. “What does she even want? She can stop by the apartment if she wants to see Ren so badly. The woman is unemployed, she has time.”

“I think she wants to talk about getting a tutor for Ren.” Satoru shares, and you sigh. She’s brought up getting a tutor for your son and you’ve turned her down. Ren is going to start school soon, you just want him to enjoy the time he has left before going to school daily. He knows everything that’s necessary, at least from what you’ve seen.

“Can you tell her to drop it?” You respond, and Satoru takes a deep breath. He doesn’t really want to get in between your issues. He also doesn’t see a downside to a tutor so he can’t really agree with you.

“Why shouldn’t Ren have a tutor? I mean, since you didn’t send him to preschool then–” He says, and you have to cut him off. He’s irritating you more than ever.

“Ren is fine without one, Satoru. I’ve made my decision. This conversation is over.” You tell him, and he clenches his jaw. You walk away, and the man curses under his breath. You hear it though, and you just tell yourself that if he dares stop by, you’ll slam the door in his face.

“Daddy!” You hear Ren yell. A sigh escapes your lips as you stand in the kitchen. The plan was to not let him in, but you forget that this is his mother’s apartment and he obviously can get entrance easily. You shouldn’t be upset, Ren is happy to see his father… But you really don’t want to spend more time with Satoru.

Perhaps you should consider having split custody but the thought of not having Ren by your side at all times hurts. It’s selfish, but you think you have the right to be selfish after everything. Satoru can’t be the only selfish one here.

You turn off the stove and wipe your hands before walking out of the kitchen. You glare at Satoru as he picks up Ren from the floor, and he begins to talk to his son. Satoru looks at you briefly before looking away. For a man that wants your forgiveness, he sure loves to piss you off, at least that’s what it seems.

“It’s nice to see you, Satoru. Next time send a message.” You say to the man, who smiles at you. You roll your eyes at him, and Satoru bites down his bottom lip. He mutters an apology, but you pretend not to hear it. “I made dinner for two, seems like you’ll have to sit this one out.”

“It’s fine. I’m not hungry.” He lies. He hears his stomach growl but it’s not like he was expecting to have dinner with you and Ren. You do usually make extra though. He doesn’t know why he was expecting differently since he’s not in your good graces right now.

“Are you hungry?” Ren asks, and Satoru shakes his head. However, Ren hears Satoru’s stomach growl again. When you walk away, Ren puts his ear around Satoru’s ear, bringing his little lips to Satoru’s ear, “We can share my dinner.”

“It’s okay, baby. You’re a growing boy, you need it more than me.” Satoru grins. His son really is an angel sent from heaven– Well maybe not that, but he’s certainly sweet. “I’ll just order something, and get you a dessert too.”

“Can it be ice cream?” Ren looks at his father with puppy eyes but Satoru isn’t too sure that getting ice cream delivered is a good idea.

“We’ll see.” Satoru says before putting Ren down on the floor. Satoru puts his hands in his pockets, awkwardly watching as Ren goes to your side. The food you’re making smells so good, and his mouth is salivating. 

“Ren, take a seat, baby. I’ll give you your plate.” You tell the boy, and Ren nods in response. He makes sure to grab Satoru’s hand and drag him to the dinner table. Satoru can’t help but notice how Ren grew an inch. That almost brings a tear to Satoru’s eye because the kid is growing up too fast. 

It’s awkward to have Satoru sit at the dinner table while you and Ren eat. But Satoru wasn’t invited so he shouldn’t expect to have a plate. Especially when you’re mad at him.

“Can daddy sleep over?” Ren asks you, and you shake your head. There’s no space for Satoru in your home.

“He has his own home, and he has to say hello to his mom and his wi–” Satoru cuts you off before you can get the last word out.

“Yeah, I have to go back home before my own mommy gets worried about me.” Satoru chuckles, and he can’t even believe the words that leave his lips. He doubts his mother would get too worried about him. Only God knows how badly he wants to stay the night, he misses staying under the same roof as his son, but he knows you’d be too uncomfortable. He wishes he could go back to your vacation. 

Ren pouts, and you take a deep breath, knowing what’s about to come. However, you’re proven wrong when Ren decides to stay quiet. Instead, he asks for something different a few minutes later, “Can I stay with daddy?”

“As in?” You respond. You have an idea of what he means, but you don’t really want it to be what you’re thinking.

“Can I go to his home and sleep over?” His words hurt your heart but you can’t say no. You don’t feel like you have the right to say no. In the end, Satoru is still his dad and Satoru should be able to have him spend the night.

“If Satoru wants.” You respond, putting down your utensils because your appetite dies down. Satoru smiles at his son and nods, making you take a sip of your drink. You clear your throat and say, “I’ll go pack your bag.”

“I can help–” Satoru begins, but you don’t want nor need his help.

“I’m fine. Just watch Ren.” Your voice is a bit harsher than you mean it to be. You don’t mean to sound mad or upset, yet, that’s what your voice emits. Ren looks at his father, about to ask if you’re upset but he decides to stay quiet. 

“Are you excited?” Satoru rubs Ren’s back, smiling big at his son. Ren nods in response. He wonders where his dad lives, and how he lives. He’s not remember his grandmother’s big mansion, plus his father is a grown man, he ought to live separately from his grandmother.

“I don’t want mommy to be upset.” Ren comments, and Satoru sighs. 

“She’s not upset, if she was, she wouldn’t have let you go with me.” Satoru claims, and that makes a lot of sense in Ren’s mind so he allows himself to be happy about it. Ren stands up on his chair, looking at the hallway where his bedroom door is. When he knows the coast is clear, he gives his plate to Satoru.

“Since you’re hungry, you can have my leftovers.” Ren says when he sits back down. Satoru laughs before kissing the top of Ren’s head. He really can’t thank you enough for Ren. You’re not even talking to him though, and he has to think of how to fix that because showing up unannounced at your apartment isn’t going to.

“Ren… What’s a gift your mommy would really like?” Satoru can’t believe he’s asking his four-year-old (who keeps reminding everyone that he’s almost five) what to get for you. A couple of years ago Satoru would’ve known immediately, but you’ve changed. The person that knows you better than anyone is your son.

“A puppy.” Ren doesn’t waste a second. Now, Satoru doesn’t know you as well as he did, but what Ren answered sounds like something that Ren wants and not you. Satoru crosses his arms and raises his brows.

“Really? Is that something mommy wants or something Ren wants?” Satoru says, and Ren purses his lips together. How the hell is he supposed to know what you like? Satoru ends up sighing. He’ll figure it out.

He makes sure to finish the food quickly before you get back, putting the plate back on Ren’s side. Satoru ruffles Ren’s hair and stands up to go to the kitchen to get himself a glass of water. Satoru hears,

“Here’s your bag, Ren. Listen to whatever your daddy says.” And Satoru almost laughs at how stoic you sound.

“We’re not leaving yet!” Satoru yells from the kitchen before walking back. Satoru doesn’t really like being in his home for too long, why would he immediately leave? He’s still going to pester you, even if you’re mad at him. “How about we watch a movie here?”

“I mean, it’s not like I can kick you out. You have a key to the place.” You answer. “Knock yourselves out– Hold on, Ren’s plate is too clean.”

“The boy was hungry, what can I say?” Satoru and Ren have been caught red-handed. 

“Yeah, little Ren that barely touches his carrots finished them all?” You click your tongue, and Satoru scratches the back of his neck. 

“We’ve got a growing boy…” Satoru chuckles, and you roll your eyes.

[toournextadventure]

our little secret pt.v

Summary: Letters to you.

Word Count: 4.5k Warnings: swearing, mention of possible suicide (slight mention, nothing happens), mental instability, mental spiraling, religious talk (Southern Christianity) Pairing: Lorraine Day x Reader (Masterlist) A/N: this is like a little filler, just having fun trying out something different. Don't worry, there's still a giant chapter left! Also? When Lorraine signs the letters to you, she puts a little heart over the i <3

June 15th

I thought you said you’d always be waiting. But I come home to hear from your momma that you’re on a vacation with Roy? Why didn’t you tell me before I left? I would have given you a proper goodbye.

It’s probably a good idea, though. Roy could definitely use the break and I’m sure you can too. I know the past few weeks have been… rough. I’m sorry. I didn't know it was going to happen. But we can talk more about things when you get back. For now, make sure you have some fun, okay?

Your momma said y’all went out West. If you could write me back and let me know where, maybe I can meet up with you. We can have a proper vacation for once. Do y’all have any real plans, or are you just traveling? I’m sure either one will do the job. You always did want to get out of town for a bit.

Our shoot went well. Max and Bobby-Lynne asked about you the whole time. It doesn't sit right with me when they're constantly checking up on you. Maybe I'm just jealous. It's probably nothing compared to how you feel. At least they mean well, I suppose. They send you their love. Maxine sent… a little more than love, but I’m not telling you about that.

By the time you get this letter, it shouldn’t be too long before you’re back home. I’ll be here waiting for you, okay? Don’t forget to send me some postcards. And if you find anything cute, don't forget to buy it for me! I'll pay you back, I promise.

I'll see you soon.

Yours, Lorraine

—---

June 29th

Having too much fun?

We all thought you'd both be home by now. The 4th is next week, you know. We never miss the 4th. Daddy said he would cook out this year. He's making your favourite and Beau and Huck got the good fireworks. We can take the truck out and watch the show, just you and me. RJ will be out so we can be free for a bit. That’ll be nice, right? A nice little break. So you better not miss it.

Speaking of, Beau isn’t too happy that you’re not home yet. He’s been doing a lot of pacing and mumbling a bunch of nonsense. I think he’s being a bit dramatic. He’s not happy that you left without letting him know. Said he could have told you a few places to go to be safe. I think he just misses you. We all do.

We haven’t been out to a shoot for a while. I’m glad. It hasn’t been the same since RJ proposed. Nothing has, really. Things just don’t feel the same. There’s guilt in everything I do now, I don’t know how to explain it. I just don’t feel comfortable with anything, even daily chores. Did you ever feel that guilt? The one that sits deep in your belly?

On a brighter note, Jimmy and Liz are back in town. They seem to be doing good. And no, they’re not pregnant, thank God. It’s a modern miracle. They had hoped to see you before the summer is over. Of course they will though, it’s not even July yet, the summer is still young. Besides, I know no vacation is more fun than hanging out with us, right? Even Roy would agree, I know it.

Momma is calling me to dinner now, so I’ll wrap it up. I’ll see you on the 4th, okay?

Yours, Lorraine

—---

July 23rd

Hey darlin, I think it’s about time you came home. You’ve more than missed the 4th, and Lorraine ain’t too happy. It’s the first time you’ve missed a holiday, you know? It ain’t like you. I know this ain’t the happiest place for you right now, but your family is here. We’re all here.

Where’d you go anyhow? You and Roy are homebodies, y’all don’t know anybody out West. If you really wanted a vacation, you could’ve waited for us to get home. We would’ve taken you. I’m sure Lorraine would’ve been happy to go too. We could’ve had a double vacation, you know? Like we always talked about?

Huck and I won our competition the other day. Wish you had been there to cheer us on. We wiped the floor with everybody. Best team ropers in the South, just you wait. You’d best come home for the next one. I’d hate to get too popular for you to notice us, you know?

I’ll keep Lorraine calm and happy, but I really need you to get home, darlin. It’s a bit past time to be concerned. At the very least, send us a letter back. I can handle you being gone for so long if I know where you are. I know this isn’t a happy place, but we’re still worried about you. We can make it a better place again, I promise.

Just send me something back, okay? I’d appreciate it.

Love you, Beau

—---

August 12th

Hon, I really think you need to come home. Lorraine and Beau are losing their minds. No one has heard from you or Roy since you left, and your parents don’t seem worried at all. Your momma seems the slightest bit concerned, but your daddy isn’t. Everyone is just acting weird, so you need to come home.

Jim and Liz left for seminary again last week. They were mighty upset they didn’t get to see you before they left. It’s been about since Christmas since y’all were together, right? They miss you both. Y’all are family. Maybe try to write him while y’all are gone, I’ll write his address at the bottom in case you don’t remember.

If I have to listen to Beau and Lorraine ask where you are one more time, I’m going to lose my mind. You know neither one of them knows how to be patient or think logically. They have a single bad thought and run with it. I need you here to help me calm them down, because you’re fine, just taking a break from everything.

No one blames you for taking a break. After everything… it’s the least you deserve. I’m not supposed to tell you this, but Lorraine asked the other night if this is her fault. I told her it wasn’t. We all know that girl loves you to the moon and back. And we all know you love her back. Things can be worked out, but you’ve got to come back home first, okay?

After all this, you had better be having the time of your life, darling. I’m going to assume as much since you’re not answering anybody. Hey, if you can’t write back, can you at least give us a number to try and call you at? Beau said he’d pay any long-distance charges, he just wants to make sure you’re okay.

He’s playing the part of a dutiful boyfriend, you know. Everyone thinks it’s romantic. I know he’s just worried about you, but it’s weird to hear everyone giving him their sympathies. Is this how you feel when everyone talks to Lorraine about RJ? Like you’re in second place in a race you hadn’t wanted to compete in? Because if so, then I think I understand you a bit. It’s… not a nice feeling.

Ah, I won’t get sentimental. We can talk more when you get home. I think I understand you a little better. That’s kinda sad, isn’t it? Took you leaving for me to get a better grip on your feelings? Well, just come home soon so we can talk. As I’ve made clear, Beau and Lorraine miss you. But I miss you too, darling. Enjoy your trip, but please come home soon safe and sound.

With love, Huck

—---

October 9th

This ain’t funny anymore, you know. It ain’t funny, and you need to get home now. You can quit ignoring all our letters, we get it. You’re hurt, you’re upset, you wanna teach us a lesson or somethin. We get it, we understand, just come home.

Lorraine is losing her gotdamn mind, and quite frankly I am too. No one’s heard a peep from you or Roy. You didn’t even like the West, you had always said it was too different. Never liked how they did their food either. So why would you even go out that way anyway?

You’re probably out drinking those fancy beers they try to peddle up there. They’re not as good as ours and you know it. Or you’re out doing those stupid hikes that you never cared for, getting more blisters on your heels because you don’t even like walks. There’s nothing good out there and you need to come back.

You should’ve left us a note before you left. That ain’t like you, you know. You always let us know where you’re going. You couldn’t even go to church camp back in the day without leaving a personalised letter for each of us. But now you just up and leave in the middle of the night? No warning? That ain’t right and you know it.

People keep asking me where you are and I don’t have any more answers. I can only say “she’s on vacation” so many times before people realise it’s a lie. And it is, isn’t it? It’s a lie. You’re not on some damn vacation. If you ran off, just let me know. I’ll leave you alone as long as I know you’re safe.

Did we make you that miserable? Was being around us so awful that you had to leave? You could’ve told us first. We could’ve come up with a plan, something that wouldn’t hurt you so bad. I don’t know what we could’ve done, but we could’ve tried something. Anything at all.

I need you to answer my letters, honey. I really need you to let me know you’re safe.

Please be safe.

Love you, Beau

—---

December 17th

You missed Halloween. And Thanksgiving. Are you going to miss Christmas too? And New Year's Eve? Am I going to have to jump into the new year without you? Please let me know if I am, because I need to be prepared. I’ve spent holiday after holiday waiting for you to come back, for you to spend it with me again. I get my hopes up every single time just for you to not be there.

RJ keeps asking me what’s wrong, and I’m honest with him. I miss you. I miss you so badly my chest aches. But he doesn’t understand. He thinks I just miss my best friend. And I do, you’ve always been my best friend. But you’re so much more than that, and I can’t explain it to him until you get back because I need someone to hold on to while you’re gone. When are you coming back?

Are you waiting for an apology? Because I’ll give you one, I’ll give you as many as you want. I’m sorry about RJ. I’m sorry about the proposal and that I didn’t say no. I’m sorry about Mr. Dylan, he never should’ve touched you. I’m sorry I didn’t say goodbye properly. I’m sorry I avoided you after the proposal, I was just scared and didn’t know what to do.

I’ll say sorry for anything you want or need. Just please answer me. Please come home. I don’t want anything else for Christmas, I don’t want any other miracle, I just want you. Please come home.

I miss you.

Yours, Lorraine

—---

January 24th

We searched Roy’s room and found all his guns gone.

I’m done asking, darling, you need to call us or send us a letter. Now. Now, I don’t believe Roy would do anything to you, but your daddy is on a kick about how unstable he was. How he’s still sick from the devil and all that nonsense he would always preach. I know he wouldn’t touch a hair on your head, but I really need you to answer me.

Lorraine has been losing her patience with RJ. She yelled at him the other day just because he tried to hold her hand. Told him not to touch her. It was quite the show. And it’s going to get her in trouble. She needs you, you know? You’re not the only one who has to hide.

I’m sorry, but I went through your room. It’s been long enough, your momma practically gave me the go ahead. You didn’t take any of your letters from Lorraine. Did you mean to leave them? I hope you didn’t. I hope it was an accident, and you didn’t mean to leave us behind.

Beau has a letter for you too, but he’s not done with it. I don’t know how to help him. He’s got himself convinced he should’ve done more. I don’t know what he should have done. I don’t know what he could have done differently. Did you want him to propose? The three of us could’ve moved off somewhere, you know. We could’ve made it work if it’s what you wanted.

Everyone wants you home. They need you to come home. No one is complete without you, it’s like a big part of town is missing. Stevie from the bar finally pulled me aside and asked about you last weekend. I couldn’t even give him an answer. He said he’d pray for you. Said he’d keep a shot of the good stuff saved for when you get back.

Fuck it. I miss you too. You’re one of my very best friends, hon. You’re the one who’s been with me through everything. Hell, you introduced me to Beau. You’re the only one I can truly talk to about things. I need you home too, okay? You’re part of my home, so I need you to come back.

I need you to write back.

With love, Huck

—---

January 30th

You’re an absolute bastard. You know that? You’re a fuckin bastard. A vacation? Give me a fuckin break, you didn’t go on no gotdamn vacation. Where’d you go, huh? Somewhere we’d never find you? Did Roy convince you to leave? He probably did, the prick. Ain’t no way you would’ve left on your own, you’re not stupid.

What the hell were you thinkin? Just up and leavin like it ain’t nobody’s business. Well it’s my business. It’s my fucking business and you should’ve told me. You’re supposed to be my girlfriend. I don’t care that we’re pretendin, I still fuckin care about you and you just fuckin left? Did I mean that little to you?

We had a pretty great thing goin, you didn’t have to leave and ruin it. I don’t care that it was a lie, we were happy. I still had Huck, and you still had Lorraine, and we were happy. You didn’t have to pack your bags and leave like a thief in the night to, what, prove a point? Well I get it now, you weren’t as happy as I thought. You could’ve told me instead of doin all of this.

You’d better answer the gotdamn letter this time. I ain’t playin around anymore. You better answer the letter and get your ass home. And if Roy is readin this, then you better get her home. You’d better have kept your gotdamn hands and your guns away, and you better get her home. Now.

Beau

—---

February 15th

Hey, momma said I should try to send you something. She said you might answer me since I’m your baby brother. Are you and Roy okay? I don’t care what Pap says, I know y’all aren’t dumb, y’all didn’t go do something stupid. Roy probably just grabbed his guns to keep you safe. He’s not crazy.

Gramma came down with something nasty. The doctors think it’s pneumonia, but we’re still waiting for tests to come back. You both should probably get back just in case it’s bad. She misses you. She prays for you both twice a day. It’s really sweet, she just wants you both safe.

Seminary has been alright. Boring. You would’ve liked it more. Heck, you would’ve been better at it. No one knows the bible quite like you, I don’t care what Pap says. If any one of us should’ve gone off to study, it should’ve been you. Maybe once he sees how bad at it I am, he’ll change his mind. Think so? Probably not.

I’m waiting to propose to Liz until you both get back. I’ve got it all planned out and everything, even bought a ring. You’d like it, I think. But I can’t get married without my big siblings, right? Don’t worry, I can be patient. Y’all just get home safe and sound, you hear?

We love you. The both of you. We’ll see you soon.

Jimmy

—---

February 18th

Your Gramma passed away today. The funeral is in two weeks. That should be more than enough time for you to get back.

We’ll see you soon, love.

With love, Huck

—---

March 4th

Your Gramma’s funeral was today. You weren’t there. Why weren’t you there? You meant the world to her. She meant the world to you. You were the one she wanted to see, and you weren’t even there to see her buried.

She would have wanted you to be here.

Yours, Lorraine

—---

April 4th

A police report came in that they found two bodies in the river a few hours away from here. The bodies are decomposed too much to make identifications. I swear to god, hon, it better not be you. I know things were hard. For the both of you. But you didn’t have to go and do that.

It better not be you.

With love, Huck

—---

May 26th

Your daddy practically declared you both dead at church this morning. I guess after almost a year, he’s tired of worrying about it. He was never a patient man. I don’t think anyone really believed him, but who’s going to argue with their preacher? No one in this town, that’s for sure. Momma and daddy said you’re probably fine, just got sick of your daddy. No one would blame you if that were the case.

After church, Mr. Dylan told your daddy you and Roy had tried to kill him the night you left. If that were true, I don’t know why he didn’t bring it up when everyone was asking where you were. Don’t know why he saved it for now, but he did. Said you had both tried to kill him in the church.

He told your daddy you were a queer. Said you were a queer and you were going to infect the town with your sin. Huck hit him. Square on the jaw, knocked him out cold. I had thought it would be Beau. I hope he gave Mr. Dylan a concussion.

Did he really find out? Because I didn’t tell anybody, I swear. We always kept things a secret. At least I think we did. No one was ever around that didn’t already know. I know none of my crew told, they wouldn’t dare. I promise I didn’t tell anyone.

Momma asked me this evening if you really were queer. I didn’t know what to say. I didn’t know what her reaction would be. She has always loved you, I didn’t want her to think any less of you because of what Mr. Dylan said. Daddy said we shouldn’t talk about it while you’re not here. Said it wasn’t right to talk behind your back. I don’t want them to hate you.

I won’t ever let them hate you.

Yours, Lorraine

—---

June 1st

I hate you. Wherever you are, whatever you’re doing, I hate you. I hate you, and I hate Roy, and I hate this fuckin town and everyone in it.

You were supposed to be here, gotdammit. You were supposed to be here, and we were all supposed to grow old together. What the fuck were you thinkin? Don’t you know how much you’ve hurt me? Don’t you understand? We might not have been in love, but that didn’t mean I didn’t love you. I loved you, and you went and broke my heart like this?

We were all supposed to be together, you know. No matter what, remember? I thought you were my Huckleberry. Well what are you now, huh? A coward. You’re a fuckin coward. What, times get hard so you leave? You just pack your shit and leave with your crazy fuckin brother?

What were we to you? Were we just a means to an end? Nothing more than a toy for you to play with? Cause you were never that to me. You were never anything less than my best friend, the only girl I ever loved. And you just fuckin left me. Was I not good enough for you?

If that’s how you feel, then good fuckin riddance. Stay away. We don’t want you back in this town anyway. Go stay with your new fuckin friends that won’t ever fuckin know you or care about you the way we do. No one is ever gonna understand you like we do.

Don’t even bother comin back.

Beau

—---

June 2nd

Please come back. I can’t do this without you.

Beau

—---

June 4th

I broke off the engagement today. It’s all just too much. I can’t even stand looking at him anymore. Every time he looks at me makes my skin crawl. I can’t even stand being in the same room with him anymore. Each time he touches me makes me feel like a piece of my soul dies.

Did I do this to you? Did I push you to leave? If I did, I’m sorry. I never wanted to hurt you. If I had been smarter, I would’ve suggested dating Huck instead. Then none of this ever would have happened. The four of us would’ve been together and no one would have ever known. We could’ve been happy.

Were you that unhappy? I never wanted you to hurt. All I ever wanted was you. Every time I had to fake a smile with RJ, or play nice, I always thought about you. I didn’t care about him, he was just a good distraction so no one would know about us. It was stupid. I never should’ve been afraid of how I felt.

I need you to come home. I need you to come home and tell me everything will be okay. Nothing feels the same without you. Foods don’t taste good, the sun isn’t as bright, nothing is fun. Most days I don’t even want to get out of bed anymore. I would rather rot away than go another day without you.

I’m sorry, okay? I’m sorry for everything. I’ll take everything back, I’ll tell the whole world that I love you. I’ll hold your hand at the store. I’ll sit in your lap at the bar, and pull you to dance with me. I’ll do whatever you want, whenever you want. I just want you back. I need you back.

I love you. You’re my home. I need you here with me.

Please come back to me.

Yours, Lorraine

—---

July 1st

You took my heart with you, you know. No one else is ever going to have it. Please keep it safe.

Yours, Lorraine

—---

The bonfire was hot against Lorraine’s skin. Far too hot. Combined with the sweltering summer heat, it was painful. She didn’t care. Painful at least felt like something. It felt like something real, something she could focus on. Almost as real as the pile of letters in her hands, all stamped with the same thing on the front in red.

Return to sender.

“I’m sorry,” Max said softly. Her hand was surprisingly cool against Lorraine’s upper arm.

On the other side of the fire, off in the distance, she could hear Beau yelling. Drunken, incoherent rambling that no one could really understand. Huck had given up on trying to console him. After all, how could he console him about something that they couldn’t fix? What would be the point?

Another beer bottle shattered against the hard ground.

You were supposed to come back. You were supposed to be there waiting for Lorraine when she got back from filming. Then you were both going to talk, and you were going to come up with a plan to get out of the engagement, and then everyone was going to be happy. Maybe you could’ve gone out East for real, like the four of you had always talked about.

The letters in her hand felt like lead.

“Do you want us to give you a minute?” Bobby-Lynne asked. She squeezed Lorraine’s shoulders. It was comforting. Grounding.

“No,” Lorraine said softly. “It wouldn’t matter anyway.”

The letters were the last connection she had to you. Your daddy had quickly emptied out yours and Roy’s rooms, labeling you both as sinners and traitors. She had been lucky enough to grab your hat before he had thrown everything out. It sat comfortably on her head right at that moment.

Her last remnants of you.

No tears came as she held the letters over the fire. The flames licked the skin of her damaged fingers. She knew, logically, it should have hurt. It didn’t. Maybe, if she kept her hand there long enough, you would appear and pull her back. You would scold her for doing something dangerous, and then you could both go to bed.

That’s all she wanted. She just wanted to go to bed.

Her fingers pried themselves away from the letters, and she watched them fall onto the bonfire. One by one they caught a spark, turning a dark brown and curling around the edges before igniting. She could see the different handwriting on each page. Beau, Huck, Jimmy. Her own. All filling the pages with their thoughts, their concerns, their feelings. Things they would never dare tell each other.

She watched the fire until the very last letter burned. Your name faded away into the orange flame. You faded away into nothing, and when your name was no longer legible, Lorraine felt her own heart go with it. There was a space shaped exactly like you within her chest. No one would ever fill it, and she didn’t want them to.

You were her heart and soul. Her home.

She would never find anyone else for as long as she lived. And then, she would find you in death.

She would find you in every lifetime. No matter how long it took.

[luci-in-trenchcoats]

He's My Man (Part 3)

Summary: Russell's returned and it appears that the reader's past employment problems are behind her. But when a shirtless Russell invites her into his home and their flirting rises to new levels, the reader will have to grapple with a new reality she doesn't know how to deal with. Russell Shaw might just be the first good guy after all...

Masterlist

Pairing: Russell Shaw x reader

Word Count: 3,500ish

Warnings: language, gun shot injury mention, smidge of angst, fluff

A/N: That ending though 👀

__________

The sun was shining high when you woke, streams of light filtering in through the large windows. You hummed as you sat up, Colter typing away at his laptop outside. There was no sign of Russell though, a frown forming on your face.

He hadn’t left already, had he? He’d promised to tell you what happened back home.

You quickly changed in Colter’s bedroom into your joggers and AC/DC shirt, deciding to try Russell’s gifts out. The bra felt amazing, especially after wearing the same dirty one for a few days in a row. Even the lilac underwear was softer than you expected. 

Outside you shrugged on one of Russell’s flannel’s, pouting when you saw his car was gone and yours was in it’s place.

“Morning,” said Colter, nodding towards where a cup of coffee laid waiting for you next to your chair.

“Hey,” you said, taking it without sitting. “I didn’t mean to sleep so late.”

“Not a problem. You haven’t been getting much lately.” You glanced around and noticed he was packed up for the most part, probably itching to get on the road. 

“You have a new case?” 

“Yeah. Oregon, not too far,” he said. He reached into his pocket, holding out your car keys. You wearily took them, Colter glancing over the top of your head. “I told him to stick around but he wanted to make sure it was ready for you.”

You raised an eyebrow, Colter shrugging.

“Apparently Russell has a place 45 minutes from here. Some cabin on a lake? I didn’t know he had a house. But uh, he hasn’t been there in awhile and he went on ahead to clean and stock up or something. He wants you to head up there so you can talk.”

“Oh. That’s…sweet.” You chugged back half your coffee, Colter eyeing you suspiciously. “What?”

“Nothing. Go have your talk.” You hummed, taking another sip. “You don’t owe him anything you know.”

“I know. We’re just friends.” Colter smirked. “You want to go down that road, Shaw? I can’t help but notice you and Reenie got that whole enemies to lovers vibe-”

“And that’s enough of that conversation,” he said, standing with a stretch. He reached into his pocket again, tossing you your phone. “Russell said it’s safe to carry again. Call if you ever need anything, Y/N.”

“Have I grown on you, Colter?” you teased. He rolled hie eyes as you handed him your empty mug. 

“Maybe. I’m working on the having friends thing.” 

“Well, you Shaw boys aren’t conventional but you’ve grown on me,” you said, opening your arms. “Come on. Let’s hug it out.”

“This is why I don’t do friends,” he half grumbled when he stepped into it, rubbing your back once more. “Hey and if you do think you want to try rewardist work, call me. We’ll talk, figure out a safe way for you to do this stuff.”

“What makes you think I won’t just go back home and do what I was before?” you asked. 

“Did you really want to do that crap again?” You frowned, shaking your head. He stepped back, pushing you towards the streamer. “That’s what I thought. Go pack. I’m sure Russell will be looking for you soon.”

One Hour Later

After leaving Colter with a promise to stay in touch, you arrived in a small town on the edges of a lake. It took a few minutes but your GPS eventually found the right road to head down. You had to question it when it told you that you’d arrived at your destination. The cabin Russell supposedly owned look more like a very expensive rustic mini-mansion some rich people would vacation to on the weekends.

Still, you pulled into the driveway and found Russell’s beat up car there. Cautiously you exited your car and went up the steps of the front porch, ringing the doorbell twice. A large wood door whipped open and you’d gotten your wish.

There was Russell before you. Damp hair slicked back, a few water droplets trailing down his broad chest and disappearing into the waist band of his navy sweatpants. You could see his tattoos scattered across his arm, a few on his wrist and thumbs and good god, how long had you been ogling his body?

Your head snapped up, Russell cockily leaning with one arm up against the doorframe wearing a satisfied smirk.

“Oh, please. Look all you want, babe.” You huffed and stormed past him, fighting the urge to turn around and see what his ass looked like in this skinny little joggers he had on. Nope. You had more self-control than that.

“You wish,” you said, surprised at the mixture of modern and rustic touches inside. “So you squatting here, Shaw?”

“I wish,” he chuckled, walking past you into the kitchen area, the smell of sandalwood and vanilla luring you to follow after. “I picked this place up after I got out of the military for cheap. Been renovating it room by room for the past decade.”

“Marble countertops?” you asked, rattling your knuckles against the white and silver veined surface. Russell leaned against the island, his biceps flexing with the movement. “I thought you said you aren’t made of money.”

“Maybe I want you to like me for me and not my wallet,” he said, looking at you through his eyelashes. “You know how much that visit to that little boutique set me back?”

“Oh, I think you can afford it,” you said, smiling as you slipped behind him, ruffling his damp strands. “Next time you want to buy me lingerie, just be a big boy and say so.”

“Here I was being thoughtful with no ulterior motives,” he said, standing and putting a hand to his chest. He frowned, closing his eyes in feigned pain. “I’m hurt, Y/N.”

“You can be thoughtful and at the same time admit you’d like to see what your choices look like.” He dropped his hand smiled.

“I really did buy them without expecting anything. I was there and thought a girl like you deserves something nice in her fucked up life.”

“I know, Russell,” you said quietly, offering him a smile. “I honestly do appreciate it.”

He nodded before going to his fridge and taking out a pair of waters, setting one on the counter near you. “You’re welcome. And if you were ever so inclined to want to show off my fashion choices, I suppose I could suffer through.”

“You’d really take that hit for the team wouldn’t you,” you teased. He hummed, crossing his arms.

“It’s a heavy burden but one I’m willing to bear.” You rolled your eyes and laughed quietly, slipping away before you got any closer to a half-naked Russell. 

You pretended to meander around the house, enjoying the openness compared to Colter’s airstreamer. A large fireplace sat in the corner and you could see through the glass doors to the back covered porch that another sat out there as well. 

“I made up the guest room.” You spun around, Russell pointing down a hallway. “Fresh sheets. Towels. I thought maybe you’d want to take a real shower and relax before you decide your next move.”

“Next move, huh.” You crossed your arms, looking out the back windows as dark clouds rolled in over the lake. “That your subtle way of saying I can’t go back home?”

Russell’s smile fell, quickly replaced with a neutral non-chalence you saw right through. He padded across the hardwoods over to your side, watching the clouds with you.

“I meant what I said last night. You’re safe. No one, and I mean no one, will ever come after you again. Go freshen up and we’ll talk after. I promise.”

“Fine. But only because Colter’s shower sucks.” You knew Russell was holding back something but you’d let it slide for the moment. A hot, long shower sounded amazing.

Forty minutes later you exited the guest suite with freshly washed hair, smooth legs and clean clothes. Alright, maybe they were Russell’s clothes he’d laid out on the bed for you but you weren’t complaining. 

“How was it?” he asked when you found him on the covered back porch, a hard rain coming down.

“I hate to sound like a girl but that was so much nicer than your brother’s tiny ass shower stall,” you said, enjoying the cool air on your flush skin. Russell refrained from saying anything about the black Stones shirt you had put on or the way you were drowning in his sweatpants. You ran your fingers through your hair, Russell watching you try to tame the mess it’d become. “You didn’t happen to pick up any hair ties or scrunchies when you clearly went to the store and got me stuff, did you?”

He reached into his pocket with a smile and a dark green scrunchie appeared on his wrist, your eyes wide. “Wait, really?”

“I’m smarter than I look,” he said. You nearly asked for it when you decided to turn around, presenting your back to him.

“Can you handle a messy bun?” you asked. A spark rang down your spine as he gathered up your hair on top of your head, gently pulling it together and securing it. You patted it when he finished, Russell taking a bow to an imaginary crowd. You put a hand on your hip, shaking your head. “Okay, how the hell do you know how to do that?”

“I could tell you but I’d have to kill you.” You rolled your eyes. “I learned it at special ops school.”

“Russ.” He laughed, taking a seat on the outdoor couch, arm over the back of it.

“I have a kid sister. I used to do her hair and shit when she was little.” You grinned, Russell holding up a finger.

“Don’t. Say-”

“Aw. What a good big brother you are,” you teased, sitting down next to him. Russell’s eyes glinted with a retort but he settled for letting his fingertips dance over your bare neck. Your breath hitched, Russell, cocking his head. “I can’t concentrate on what we need to talk about if you’re going to keep doing that.”

“Does that mean you don’t like it?” he asked, his body inviting you to tuck itself in right under that open arm. He grazed his fingers oh so lightly over your neck again and fuck, you wished he’d just grab hold and smash your lips to his already.

“You think just cause you’re sweet and thoughtful and hot and save a girl, you’ll win her over with your horrible flirting, just like that?” He leaned in close, so close you felt the heat radiating off his breath.

“I already won and she knows it. She just likes making me chase her.” You shivered when he thumbed over the back of your neck, a cocky smile on his face. “And she is a woman worth chasing so I will as long as she wants me to.”

You leaned in just when he pulled away and stood up, taking a seat in the chair opposite you with a big, stupid, cocky as fuck, smile on his face. 

“Fucker,” you growled. Russell only smiled harder. “You’re gonna pay for that.”

“Oh, I pray I do,” he said, putting his hands behind his head, licking his lips. Your eye twitched, Russell chuckling deeply. “That’s my little queen of darkness I adore.”

“We will continue this conversation later,” you said, cutting him off. Russell nodded, taking the zip up from nearby and unfortunately tugging it on over his bare chest.

“So,” he said, shoving his hands in the pockets, taking a deep breath. “You want to know what happened after you left.”

“That’d be nice, yes.” Russell pursed his lips, turning his head towards the downpour. “Russell. Come on.”

“I know you want details but I’m sorry, that’s not happening.” Your jaw dropped as he held up his hands. “You have had enough violence and death in your life. Now, I will answer your questions but I will use my discretion. You do not need…you don’t need that crap anymore. Please.”

Russell dropped his hand, leaning his elbows against his knees. When he looked up, his green eyes were somber and your heart did that flipping thing again.

“Are they all dead? The whole crew?” you asked quietly. He nodded. “That was like twenty five guys.”

“...Technically, they killed each other off. That’s why you didn’t hear about it in the news. Police are keeping it quiet.” 

“How…you tricked them?” you asked. He nodded again. “You’re sure all of them-”

“Every last one. Sides were drawn. Elpine and some of his crew got involved too, killed in the crossfire. There’s no mafia left there. No one will ever look for you again if you decide to go back.”

“If?” you asked. Russell shrugged.

“You were forced to do a job you didn’t want. You don’t want to patch up scummy guys off the street. You get to live the life you want to now. You can do that back in Virginia…or you can do a clean slate. Start over somewhere new.”

“You mean here. Stay here with you,” you said. You stood up, going to the railing, a cold breeze hitting you.

“This is a safe place and you can take as long as you need to figure out what you want to do.” You felt him behind you, his hands settling on your arms. “I have enough. I don’t want to be a private contractor forever. I am more than happy to walk away and start fresh myself.”

“Russell, you are asking a lot.”

“No I’m not.” You frowned, closing your eyes. “Despite…I’m not asking you to pick me. I’m not that crazy. I know we’re still figuring each other out. I’m asking you to pick yourself. I’m asking you to trust now that I am not like those people you worked with. You never have to pick me if that’s what you want and there are no stings attached. Ever. Just don’t go back there. Start over somewhere where life will be kind to you.”

He rubbed your arms once before you felt him move away. You glanced back over your shoulder, Russell going to the fireplace and squatting down in front of it. A moment later, flames appeared and he was tossing a few logs from nearby inside.

“Russell.” He hummed, adjusting a large log with a sharp poker. He kept his back to you for a long beat, slowly rising and setting the poker aside. When he finally looked at you, his face was neutral, void of any signs of how he actually felt. You fidgeted, tugging down the hem of your shirt awkwardly. “Put aside the flirting. You and me…it’s not going to work out.”

“You’re sure about that, are you?” You scoffed, Russell holding up his hands. 

You stormed over to him, stabbing a finger in his firm chest. “I am not whatever you think I am. I’m not a damsel looking for her white knight to come save her. I didn’t ask you to take care of my problem. You decided to do that, not me. I don’t owe you anything.”

He slowly blinked, staring down with the tiniest hint of a smirk. 

“Why are you always fucking smiling?” you growled. 

“Well if you’re going to be the grumpy then I got to be the sunshine.”

“We’re not a fucking trope! I-I don’t need you. I don’t need you to buy me things. Or do things for me. Or offer to let me stay in this beautiful house. I’ve spent my whole life alone. There is no such thing as a good guy. All you want is in my fucking pants so let’s just fuck and get this fucking thing over with so I can go the fuck home.”

Russell’s eyebrows raised. He nodded, crossing his arms. “I’m not fucking you.”

“What? That’s…you’ve been flirting the second we met!” 

“Oh, we’re past the hookup stage. We do this, it’s cause we’re the real deal.”

“Insufferable,” you muttered, going inside, pacing back and forth in the family room. To your extreme annoyance, Russell didn’t follow you. He just sat out there next to his fireplace, watching the rain come down. He really wasn’t going to talk to you about this? He was going to ignore you?

You huffed, wandering throughout the house and finding it frustratingly gorgeous. While it certainly leaned masculine as did most rustic style homes single men lived it, it felt…cozy. There was a warmth to it, even in the large expanses, that you hadn’t felt since you were a child. It was built almost like a retreat, Russell’s safe place away from the world.

You sat down on the top set of the stairs, frowning with your head in your hands.

Was there such a thing as a good guy? No, Russell wanted you for sex. A quick fuck. Maybe a fuck buddy at most but that was it. Right? He was a single man in his forties. Ex-military and he still did contracted black ops work. He was a trained killer. A deadly weapon hidden under a boyish smile and pretty face. There was no way he was a good guy that actually wanted a normal life.

“Do you always talk to yourself?” Your head snapped up, Russell giving you an awkward little wave from the landing a few feet away. You groaned, wiping your face off when you felt the trickle of tears on your cheeks. Russell stepped up and stopped, sitting down a few steps below you, close enough to reach out and grab your hand. 

“I should go,” you said. Russell simply held out his open palm, your own hands now held in your lap.

“Whether I’m good or bad, I’ll leave that up to somebody else to decide. I don’t live my life in the black and white. But I can tell you if I only wanted to screw you, I would never have invited you to my home.” You stared down at your lap, closing your eyes when his callused thumb wiped under your eye, pushing away a rogue tear. “You ain’t a damsel. You’re my queen of darkness, remember?”

Your lip twitched up briefly, Russell letting out some satisfied little sound.

“I meant what I said earlier. Stay. Rest. Figure out your next move on your own time. If me being here complicates that, I can duck out.”

“No.” You grasped his wrist, flicking open your eyes. His palm felt so hot to the touch, your heart skipping when he grazed your skin. “Stay here.”

“Okay then,” he said. He stood, leaning over and kissing your forehead. Then he was moving down the steps, whistling a peppy tune. “I’m going to make us some grilled cheese and tomato soup. Love me some grilled cheese.”

“Wait!” you called, following him down the stairs. Russell spun around at the bottom, smiling up at you. “Why…I…I-I don’t understand. You’re really just going to let me stay here? Without committing to anything?”

His face fell, brow furrowing. “You’re really starting to scare me, Y/N. When’s the last time there was someone decent in your life?”

“I’m not sure anymore,” you said quietly. “The idea of someone like you being so kind crosses a lot of wires in my head.”

“That’s why you keep freaking out when I’m not a dick and give you space.” You nodded, fidgeting with the bottom of your shirt again. He smiled, reaching up, offering his hand again. You let yours slip into it, Russell lacing your fingers together. “Well, I ain’t like other men, sweetheart. I promise you that.”

“Why me?” you asked, taking a step down, putting you at eye level with him. “I mean, why wouldn’t you want someone normal?”

“A normal girl sounds boring. Now queen of darkness? That sounds like a woman that’s badass enough to put up with me. Let’s stop freaking out, go make lunch, and let me try to help you what you want to do, okay?”

“Okay.”

“Perfect.” He pecked a kiss on your cheek, pulling you along after him. “So. Has a man ever cooked for you?”

You shook your head, Russell frowning. You yelped when he picked you up and sat you on the kitchen counter, caging you in with his muscular arms on either side.

“Alright then Y/N Y/L/N. I’m about to make you the best goddamn lunch of your life.” Before he could move, you wrapped your legs tight around his waist, keeping him so, so close. Russell’s gaze turned heated, eyes darkening. “Don’t do that.”

“Do what?” you breathed out, Russell leaning in close.

“Don’t take me unless you plan on keeping me. Based on our previous conversation, we are not there.” Slowly, you unhooked your legs, Russell straightening, looking you up and down, eyes no less dark.

“Russ?” He stared at you, licking his lips.

“Fuck it.”

And then he slammed his lips to yours, stealing your breath away in the goddamn best kiss of your life.

_________

A/N: Read Part 4 here!

[reysdriver]

Hey, I was thinking about something with best friend!Eddie and fem!best friend!reader, but they secretly like each other.

Gareth invites the Hellfire club to spend a weekend at his beach house but Eddie and Reader decide to share the same room/bed.

(I would like things like them going to the beach or helping each other put on sunscreen... 🫣🫣)

Sorry if it's a very large or very specific request, you don't have to fulfill the request in parentheses if you don't want to

thank you!❤️

you and eddie share a bed on the first night of your beach house stay — bestfriend!eddie x fem!reader fluff

warnings: language, that's it i think

words: 1.6k

a/n: I might make this a 2-parter (or more low-key) cause I want to space it out and have the absolute max amount of pining and friends-to-lovers tension hehe

Gareth stared down at you, disapproving of you calling him ‘rich boy’, while unloading your bags from the back of Eddie’s van. 

“I’m not rich, my parents just own a beach house.” He defended. 

You raised an eyebrow. “You know that’s the richest fucking thing you’ve ever said, right?”

“They bought it back in the day when shit was just cheaper. You can go if you don’t want to be here, by the way.” Gareth said it with the sass of a true non-rich boy, and you decided to lay off the teasing. 

You put your hands in the air in mock surrender. It’s been a long drive from Hawkins close to Cleveland, you weren’t turning back now. “Alright, fine, I’m done.”

You and the guys returned to grabbing your duffel bags and backpacks, then you closed the van’s back doors and went towards the front door of the brightly-painted building. Gareth put the lock into the key but faced you all before turning it. 

“So, here it is, my family’s beach house. Ready for the tour and the house rules?” Gareth asked the three of you. 

Everyone was ready for the tour, but you all seemed disappointed that there were rules you had to follow on your mini-vacation. Nevertheless, you all nodded—not necessarily agreeing to anything, just wanting to get inside and put your stuff down. 

Gareth opened the door to reveal the inside of his modest beach house. Okay, maybe he wasn’t rich rich but you still thought about teasing him a few more times throughout your stay. The inside walls of the building were mostly made from light wood, with painted accents peeling in certain places. There were seashells and sand-filled bottles as decorations in the main hall—same as most beach houses, even though the whole point of them was that they were close to the beach all the time. 

“First stop is the kitchen.” Gareth said, leading you all and stopping in front of the table. “If you want to use it, you have to promise not to burn the house down.”

Eddie shook his head. “Now, Garebear, you know I can’t make any promises like that.”

You and Jeff laughed at Eddie’s joke, but Gareth didn’t seem amused. 

“I’m watching you, Ed. I’m serious, my parents will be pissed if anything happens to this place.” He looked back to you and Jeff as he continued. “Next, we have the living room. The tv works, plus we have some movies on those shelves, so we could maybe have a movie night or something tonight.”

Jeff went to look at the shelves that his friend just pointed at. “Yo, these movies are trash!” He laughed. “I’m not watching any of these.” 

“Thank you so much for that valuable addition to the tour, Jeff. And they’re for my parents, obviously.”

“What about where we’re sleeping?” Eddie asked. 

Gareth had told you all that the sleeping situation might be a bit problematic, and that he’d try to think of a best solution, but he hadn’t even told any of you what the issue was. 

“So, we have the couch, it actually even pulls out…” Gareth paused, then started walking down a bright hallway to a pair of doors next to each other. He opened one of them. “Here’s my room; I’m sleeping here, of course.” Before you could even take a good look inside, he shut that door and opened the other. “And here’s the main bedroom. Two of you will have to share the big bed.”

All three of you looked at him with wide eyes at the idea. At the exact same time, you and Jeff tried calling dibs on the couch, then cringed at the fact that you both wanted it. 

“Eddie, you don’t want the couch?” Gareth asked, noticing he seemed pretty calm about it all.

He shrugged. “Have you seen my room? I couldn’t give a shit about where I sleep.”

Even though you’ve seen his room and understood where he was coming from, Eddie seemed like he wasn’t being completely truthful. Unfortunately, you were too focused on having your own sleeping place to ask him what was wrong. 

“Since you said it together, I may have to flip a coin.” Gareth said, already digging in his pockets to find one. 

“No way, I don’t want to sleep next to Eddie.” Jeff protested. “No offence.”

“Offence taken, actually. I’ll have you know I am a lovely spooner, both big and little.”

Gareth laughed. “Yeah, like you’ve ever gotten to spoon with someone.” Before Eddie could even respond, he held out a quarter and stood between you and Jeff. “Alright, tails means Jeff gets the couch, heads means he gets to be Eddie’s first spooning partner.” 

You nodded, watching the coin intensely as Gareth tossed it in the air. It was spinning too quickly for you to really see the sides, so you just crossed your fingers and looked at his face as he read it. 

“Tails.” He looked at you. “Looks like you and Eddie can find a way to share the big room.”

You tried keeping your sigh quiet and hiding your upset, but you had to admit you were a bit disappointed about not having your own bed. You thought about it all throughout dinner and your movie night, and it stared you in the face when it was time to go to sleep.

Eddie dug through his duffel bag to find a pair of pyjama pants and a band t-shirt—of course. “If you want me to leave the room while you change, I can. I feel like that’s what girls want, right?”

You shook your head, fiddling with the fabric from your own set. “No, no, don’t worry about that. Just turn around for a second, maybe?”

He did just as you asked, turning around to face the corner of the room and getting changed himself while he waited for you to do the same. You quickly stripped yourself of the clothes you had spent all day in, and changed into the short black set you had packed with you. 

“Okay, you can turn around now.” You told him after you were done. 

He turned as you had said, but you both hesitated to get in bed, even though there was nothing left to do. 

“You know, I can sleep on the floor or something if you don’t want to share the bed.” He offered unnecessarily. 

“No way, I know you said you don’t care where you sleep, but that’s ridiculous, Eddie. I would never ask you to do that.” You slid underneath the bed sheets on your side. They were actually nice sheets; you would be sad to see Eddie sleep on the floor and miss that sweet thread count. “We’re basically grown-ups; we can share a bed without it being a big deal.”

He seemed less reluctant than before as he laid down next to you. “Well, I just wanted to err on the side of caution.”

You couldn’t help but chuckle at that. “You never want to be cautious, Eddie. That’s like, your whole thing.”

“Yeah, well, it’s different with you.”

You weren’t quite sure what he meant by that, but you chose to ignore it in case it was something negative. There was no way you’d want to share a bed with a friend after finding out he secretly hates you or something like that. 

The two of you were lying down on opposite sides of the bed on your backs, but you leaned over to whisper to Eddie. “Goodnight, Eds.”

He wished you a good night in return, but it didn’t do much in the way of easing your nerves. For that, you just shut your eyes, clutched the blanket, and tried your hardest to fall asleep. 

You weren’t sure about how long it took, but you did eventually sleep; and you woke up practically cuddling with your best friend. You were hugging him, your head was on his chest, and his arms were wrapped around your torso in return. You also weren’t sure how you got into that position, but you knew you had to get out of it. In an attempt to be soft and silent, you unwrapped your arms from Eddie and snuck out of his grasp. 

You stood up and walked over to the nice kitchen to make yourself some morning tea—and get away from the friend you were just accidentally snuggling. 

You didn’t even let the water in the pot fully boil since you didn’t want to wake anyone up, but it seemed your attempts to be quiet were unsuccessful, since you heard footsteps coming down the hall from the bedrooms. 

Of course it was Eddie and this was the one time he woke up before the clock hit a double-digit hour. “Morning.” He mumbled, rubbing his eyes. 

“Good morning.” You held out a mug for him. “Do you want some tea?” 

“Absolutely not. But I’ll make myself a coffee if there’s any here.” 

Eddie started rooting through the lightwood cupboards to find what he wanted, but you knew where it was, so you just handed it to him. 

“Thanks.” 

“No problem.” You told him. “So, um, how’d you sleep last night?”

“Really well, sweetheart. What about you?”

You nodded and held back a smile. “Same. I slept great.”x

[fanfictionalraven]

Faithfully

Title: Faithfully

Song Inspiration: Faithfully by Journey

Characters: Reader, Dean Winchester, other SPN characters

Word Count: 4, 904

Warnings: Pregnancy

Author's Note: This was an anonymous request. Such a beautiful song and so perfect for Dean. Thanks for the idea Anon!!

Highway run into the midnight sun,

Wheels go ‘round and ‘round, you’re on my mind,

Restless hearts, sleep alone tonight,

Sendin’ all my love along the wire.

“Another?” The bartender asks Dean, pointing to the beer he’d been nursing for a while.

“No thanks. Work tomorrow,” Dean tells him, tossing some cash onto the bar. He and Sam had rolled into town a little earlier in the day. Some case Sam had found; a witch or shifter or…something. Dean couldn’t remember. 

“Leaving so soon?” A sultry voice asks. Dean looks over to find a gorgeous, young blonde sliding onto the booth beside him. She tosses her hair over her shoulder and leans forward to highlight her ample breasts. A hand reaches for his knee but Dean catches her wrist.

“Sorry, Sweetheart. Not happening,” he tells her, letting her go. She rolls her eyes and stands, moving to her next target. Dean laughs lightly, shaking his head.

A few years ago, that would have been all the invitation he’d have needed. They would have wandered out to the Impala, maybe made it back to her place for a night of meaningless sex, and he would have returned to Sam first thing in the morning, satisfied. But all that had changed almost a year ago.

As he heads out of the bar and into the cold, he pulls his phone out, smiling at the screen. The picture that greets him is one of his favorites. It’s from the small “vacation” the two of you had taken only a couple months ago. It was one of Bobby’s old safe houses he’d told Dean about; a beautiful little cabin out by a lake. Dean had snapped the picture of you sitting on the small dock, feet dangling off the edge. You’d teased him about pursuing a career in photography after seeing it.

He finds your name with ease and calls as he climbs into the driver’s seat of his car. It rings twice before you pick up.

“Hey,” you answer. Dean smiles immediately at your voice.

“Hey,” he replies. “Bad time?”

“For you? Never,” you laugh lightly. He smiles even wider at your laugh.

“Still in Utah?” The familiar sound of the Impala’s engine roaring to life comes through the phone.

“Yea. Found the nest though. Taking it out tonight,” you tell him, as you lean back against your car.

“On your own?” Dean asks, voice laced with concern.

“No, Dean,” you say, smiling to yourself. “I’m not stupid, ya know?”

“That’s not what I meant, Y/N,” he says. “Just…you know…”

“Awwww. You worried about me, Winchester?” You tease him, pushing off the car and walking to your trunk.

“Always,” he admits, almost too quietly for you to hear. Almost. Your smile softens as you open the trunk, glancing around at your weapons.

“You just calling to check up on me?” You ask, pulling a machete out to check the blade.

“No…just…missed you,” he confesses. You swing the machete around quickly to test it out. “Haven’t seen you since…”

“The cabin,” you finish. “I know. I miss you too.”

The two of you had been off and on for the majority of the time you’d known each other. It had mostly been a friends with benefits situation until last year. Suddenly, you were way more on than off. It was starting to feel like a real relationship. You hadn’t slept with anyone else and Dean said he hadn’t. You trusted him, of course.

“I’ve been thinking…” Dean starts, seemingly getting the subject away from…feelings.

“Haven’t hurt yourself, have ya?” You ask. You can practically hear Dean roll his eyes.

“Will you shut up? I’m trying to be serious here,” he tells you. You laugh and slam the trunk closed, machete in hand. Your cousin’s car pulls up, parking next to your own. You smile and wave at her.

“Serious. Right. Sorry. Go ahead,” you say.

“I was thinking you should come to the bunker,” he says. You smile and roll your eyes.

“I was planning to come by after this,” you tell him. He sighs and cuts the engine off, having reached the motel.

“No, Y/N. That’s not what I meant,” he says. You hold up a finger to your cousin, asking her to give you a minute when she gets out of the car. “You should move…into the bunker…with me.” You’re mid swing on the machete when he asks, causing you to freeze. The machete slips from your hand, landing near your cousin.

“Jesus, Y/N!!” She snaps. You wave a hand at her in apology as you walk away. 

“What are you saying, Dean?” You asks. He lets out a chuckle. 

“I’m saying that…I’ve really started to hate sleeping alone, sleeping without you. I hate waking up without you,” he starts. “Now, I don’t wanna tie you down or anything. Do your hunts, whatever you want. I just want the bunker to be…home.” You hold the phone away for a moment and breathe deeply. You were mere moments from clearing a vampire nest. You weren’t about to cry. Returning the phone to your ear, you can’t help but smile.

“Dean,” you say. “I’ll go anywhere you go. You’re already my home.” Dean smiles and closes his eyes for a second, thanking anyone who was listening.

They say that the road ain’t no place to start a family,

Right down the line, it’s been you and me,

And lovin’ a music man ain’t always what it’s supposed to be,

Oh, girl, you stand by me,

I’m forever yours,

Faithfully.

You walk into the kitchen of the bunker one morning, stretching. Sam’s already sitting at the table, his laptop open in front of him. You smile at him widely and walk over, kissing his cheek quickly.

“Morning, Sammy,” you tell him. He looks at you and laughs lightly.

“Good morning,” he says, watching as you walk over to the counter, humming. You pour yourself a cup of coffee, swaying to the music in your head. “You’re awful perky this morning.”

“Am I?” You ask, glancing back at him. He laughs and nods. You shrug, leaning against the counter. 

“I guess you two had a good Valentine's Day?” He asks. 

“We had a great Valentine’s Day,” you laugh. 

“Well, I’m glad,” Sam tells you, looking back at his computer. Dean comes in, a smile to rival yours plastered on his face. He walks over and kisses you quickly before getting his own coffee. Sam looks at the two of you and starts to laugh. “Is that a hickey??” He asks. You and Dean exchange glances before Dean moves your hair from your shoulder, examining your neck briefly. He smirks.

“Looks like it,” he says. You laugh and shrug at Sam.

“I said it was great,” you tell him. Dean smiles and pulls you in for another kiss, your arms snaking around his neck.

“I found a case. If either of you care,” Sam announces. Dean sighs as he let you go and turns to his brother, taking a drink of his coffee. “Stacy Altman, 19 year old babysitter from Hudson, Ohio was murdered last night,” he says. Dean nods slightly.

“Oh, that blows. But if her name’s not Amara, how is that us?” He asks. You lean against Dean and he wraps his arm around your waist.

“Because her heart was ripped out,” Sam tells you both. You grimace and Dean nods.

“On Valentine’s Day? What is that, like an ironic werewolf? Alright, we’ll check it out. But first, I need bacon.” Dean gives your waist a squeeze then looks down at you. “You coming?”

“Think I’ll hang back, keep working this Amara thing,” you tell him, going to leave the kitchen. Dean smirks and gives your ass a quick smack. You let out a squeak of surprise and look back at him as you go into the hallway. You just hear Sam mutter something about the two of you being disgusting as you head back towards your bedroom.

Glancing over your shoulder, you close the door behind you before locking yourself in the bathroom. You look at yourself in the mirror, take a deep breath, then pick up the stick you had left on the counter earlier.

“Please be negative,” you mumble a quick prayer.

You and Dean had only been together for about a year. You were both hunters. God’s sister was currently on the loose and very much out to end the world. This had to be the absolute worst timing. The two of you hadn’t even discussed starting a family. It certainly wasn't on your radar and you couldn’t imagine it was on Dean’s either.

You’d bought the pregnancy test a few days ago when your period failed to make its monthly appearance. You hadn’t mentioned anything to Dean yet, didn’t want him freaking out over nothing. Cause that’s all this was, of course. Nothing.

The timer you had set on your phone goes off and you nearly jump out of your skin. You flip the test over and…

**

About a day later, Dean pulls the Impala into the garage of the bunker. He sighs as he cuts the car off and lays his head against the steering wheel. Sam looks at him and smiles a little.

“Dean, it’s not that big of a deal. It’s not like you cheated on her,” he says. Dean shakes his head slightly.

“Doesn’t feel different,” he says. “We just had this great day, things were going so well…”

“She won’t be upset, Dean. Come on,” he says, getting out of the car. Dean frowns then gets out as well. They both get their bags and then head to their respective bedrooms. Dean tosses his bag into the corner then sits on the edge of the bed, running his hands over his face.

You make your way down to the room nervously, wringing your hands. You’d been practicing your speech ever since you’d read the test. You had it all planned out and were absolutely prepared to tell Dean. That was until he’d told you they were headed home. The minute you’d received that text, your nerves had gotten the better of you. You had been running every possible bad scenario, each one worse than the last.

“Dean?” You ask, stepping into the bedroom. You frown when you see him so distraught. “What’s wrong??” You ask. He pats the spot next to him and you bite your lip as you walk over. He knows. He already knows and he’s breaking up with me. You sit down next to him and he turns to face you.

“This case…it was a witch, a curse…it was passed by kissing. I kissed the woman who had it and got it passed to me so she was safe,” he explains. You let out a breath and take his hands in your own.

“Dean, did you think I’d be upset about that?” You ask with a laugh. He sighs and shakes his head.

“I’m not finished,” he tells you. Your smile falls slightly and he looks at your hands. “The curse, it takes the form of your deepest, darkest desire and then that person or whatever kills you.”

“I’m…guessing that wasn’t me,” you say. He shakes his head. “Amara?” You already knew before he said anything else. From the moment she’d been freed from her cage, she had some weird connection to Dean. It had only been a few weeks since he told you that she’d kissed him and he couldn’t help but kiss her back. It stung, sure, but you knew it wasn’t Dean.

“I don’t want this, Y/N. I don’t want her. I just can’t shake this hold she has on me. Sitting here with you right now, I want nothing more than to kill her,” he starts quickly. “But when I’m around her, I can’t do anything.” You let his hands go and take his face gently, raising it up to meet yours. You press a soft, gentle kiss to his lips.

“I’m not mad at you, Dean. I know you love me. We’ll shake this Amara thing soon enough and get back to normal,” you assure him. “You and me. And…whoever else comes along.” He looks up at you, confused. You smile at him and stand, walking over to the desk. It isn’t until now that Dean notices the small gift bag sitting on it. “It’s a little late for Valentine’s now but…” You shrug and hand him the bag. He raises a skeptical eyebrow at you before pulling the pink and blue tissue paper out of it. He looks into the bag, then up at you quickly.

“Is this…” He stops before sliding the contents of the bag into his hand. His hands shake as he flips it around, trying to find the little screen for confirmation.

Pregnant.

“Oh my god,” he says, staring down at the test in his hand. “This is…”

A mistake. The worst possible timing. Not what I want at all. You brace yourself against the desk behind you, waiting for the death blow.

“This is…incredible,” Dean says finally, looking up at you. There are tears in his eyes threatening to spill over but his face changes the second his eyes meet yours. “Are you okay?” He asks, jumping up quickly. His hands come to rest on your shoulders as he looks you over. “Y/N, you look like you’ve seen a ghost. Which…is really saying something for us.”

“You’re happy,” you say quietly, looking at him. His brow furrows in confusion as he takes in your state.

“What? Of course I’m happy!! I mean…” He stops and shrugs. “Timing could be better but…a baby!!” He lets out a laugh and lifts you into a tight hug, spinning you around the room. You squeal and laugh as well, tears of sheer joy and relief streaming down your cheeks. “I’m gonna be a dad!! Sammy!!” He calls out, setting you on your feet. He grabs your hand and pulls you down the hallway quickly. 

Circus life under the big-top world,

We all need the clowns to make us smile,

Through space and time, always another show,

Wonderin’ where I am lost without you,

3…2…1…*beep, beep, beep*

You stare into the microwave as the light goes out. Popping the door open, you grab the bottle and test the milk on your wrist. Perfect temp. You turn to go feed your three month old son and accidentally send the stack of neglected and dirty dishes crashing to the floor. 

“Dammit,” you curse, setting the bottle on the counter. Kneeling down, you start to pick up the pieces of the shattered dishes and old food.

“Y/N?” Mary asks, stepping into the room. “What happened?” She comes over quickly to help. You glance up at her and shake your head before hissing in pain. You’d managed to cut your hand on a shard of glass. “Oh, Y/N.” Falling back against the counter behind you, your emotions overwhelm you.

“I can’t do this anymore, Mary,” you cry.

Dean and Sam were missing. They had taken on Lucifer once again and this time he was possessing the president. That was almost two months ago. For two months you've been struggling to take care of your newborn son on your own. Sure, you had Cas and Mary but it wasn’t the same. D.J. needed his father.

“I’m so sorry, Y/N. I…what do you need me to do?” She asks, handing you a dish towel. Wrapping it around your cut hand, you glance back up at the bottle.

“Could you feed D.J. for me? I just…I need a minute,” you tell her. 

“Of course,” she says. She gives your arm a quick, reassuring squeeze before leaving you alone in the kitchen.

You lay your head back against the counter and close your eyes, allowing the tears to fall once again as you contemplate life as a single mother. You knew this life was risky, of course. You knew there was always a chance one of you wouldn’t come back from a hunt. You just didn’t expect it to be two months into actually being parents.

“Y/N? Are you alright?” Cas asks, when he sees you. You shake your head, eyes still squeezed closed as you cry.

Cas frowns as he walks over, taking in the disaster that is the kitchen. He hesitates for a moment before carefully sitting down next to you. You lay your head over on his shoulder as the sobs rake through your body. Cas shifts awkwardly and you feel his arm come around your shoulders, comfortingly. The pain alleviates in your hand and you pull it from the towel, perfectly healed.

“Thank you,” you mumble between sobs.

“I wish there was more I could do,” he says. You wipe at your cheeks and shake your head.

“Please stop blaming yourself. You followed the plan,” you tell him, laying your head back on his shoulder. 

The two of you sit in silence for a while, you don’t know how long. Eventually, you sit up and find a clean part of the partially bloodied towel to wipe your face. You rise from the floor and look at the mess at your feet before taking in the rest of the kitchen. You’d really let things slide lately. You sigh and shake your head, going to get the trash can. Mary comes back into the kitchen.

“No,” she says. You stop and look at her.

“What?” You ask, confused.

“You need to go get some rest. Take a shower. Take a nap. Refresh and reset,” she tells you, taking the trash can from your hand.

“Mary, there’s too much to do,” you respond, looking around at the kitchen again. It wasn’t just the kitchen either. You knew the library, war room, and bedrooms needed your attention as well.

“Castiel and I will take care of it,” she says, sending a pointed look to the angel as he gets up from the floor. He nods, looking at you.

“Of course,” he says. Looking between the two, you realize there’s no point in arguing. You were absolutely exhausted, barely able to get any sleep the last two months. Mary smiles at you, reassuringly.

“Shower. Bed,” she tells you. You sigh and nod, reaching for the baby monitor but Mary snatches it up quickly. “I’ve got him too.”

“Okay,” you surrender, holding your hands up.

You head down the hall and steal a quick peek in at your son, sleeping soundly in his crib. Continuing down the hall, you go into yours and Dean’s bedroom, closing the door behind you. One hour-long, steaming hot shower later, you slip into one of Dean’s t-shirts then under the covers. You don’t expect sleep to overwhelm you as quickly as it does. Your last thoughts are the same as they’ve been for the last two months.

Where are you, Dean?

And being apart ain’t easy on this love affair,

Two strangers learn to fall in love again,

I get the joy of rediscovering you,

Oh, girl, you stand by me,

I’m forever yours,

Faithfully.

Dean smiles politely at the waitress, taking his order. She was clearly flirting with him even though he’d told her about you and D.J. She walks off to put his order in, dinner for him and Sam to go, and he pulls his phone out to call you. It rings three times before you pick up.

“Hey,” you say, smiling. You’re sitting in the library, having just gotten D.J. down for the night.

“I miss you,” he says with a sigh. “This waitress won’t leave me alone.”

“I’m sorry. Is Dean Winchester complaining about being hit on?” You laugh. He shakes his head as he glances around, his eyes landing on the mechanical bull.

“I told her I had someone back home and a kid. She’s still flirting,” he says, watching as someone gets thrown off. He lets out a chuckle. “I was better than that,” he mumbles.

“What?” You ask.

“There’s a…a mechanical bull,” he tells you. You throw your head back, laughing. “What’s so funny?”

“I would pay to see that,” you tease him.

“Hey. I was awesome,” he assures you.

“Man. I can’t believe I missed that,” you say, still laughing. He smiles and shakes his head before someone catches his attention.

“Babe, I gotta let you go. Think I just got a lead on our case,” he says, standing up quickly. Your smile slips slightly and you nod.

“Be careful,” you tell him before he hangs up. You sigh and lean back in the chair.

**

“Dean’s been hexed. He’s losing his memory.”

That was the call you’d received from Sam earlier in the day. He thought it might be best if you were there to help. Thankfully, Mary had been in the neighborhood so she could keep D.J. for you. You’d peeled out of the garage, tires squealing as you headed for Arkansas, a 7 and a half hour drive. You make it in six.

You whip into the parking lot of the motel Sam had given you the address to and park next to the Impala. Grabbing your bag, you make for the door of the guys’ room and knock quickly. However, it isn’t Sam or Dean who answer the door but Rowena. Your shock gives way to anger almost immediately.

“Did you do this??” You snap, stepping up to her quickly. Her eyes widen in surprise before she smiles.

“Afraid not, dear,” she says. “But I am here to help.”

“Help? Are you kidding?” You ask, looking at Sam as he steps up behind Rowena.

“I know, I know. But...I didn’t know where else to go,” he explains. You sigh and glance around, spotting Dean sitting on one of the beds. He’s laughing at whatever he’s watching on the TV. He looks over and his eyes lock with yours before he smiles widely.

“Hi,” he says, standing. He remembered you. You smile as you walk over to him.

“Hey. How are you feeling?” You ask, your hands resting on his arms. He looks down at your hands then back at you.

“Much better now that you're here,” he says, his smile turning into a smirk. “I’m, ugh…I’m…”

“Dean,” Sam says, frowning.

“Yea. I’m Dean,” he says, introducing himself. Your smile fades as you take a step back. He didn’t remember you. It was worse than you’d thought. Sam’s hand comes to rest on your shoulder and you shake your head.

“I need some air,” you say quietly before leaving the room. Dean frowns as you go and Sam sighs, ushering him to the bathroom to talk. He explains the situation to him, reminding him of everything, everyone. Dean runs a hand over his face.

“So, after everything…that’s it. This is what nails me,” he says. Sam shakes his head quickly.

“No. No, no. Dean. I-it,” he stops and takes a deep breath. “It’s not gonna happen, all right?” Dean looks at him and Sam can see the fear in his eyes.

“Well, you just told me my whole life story. And I gotta be honest, man. I…I can feel it, slipping out of my head. I mean ganking monsters is one thing. But this…” He covers his face with his hands. “I forgot Y/N and my own son.”

“We’ll figure it out. We will,” Sam assures his older brother before standing up. He leaves the bathroom and finds you outside the door.

“Can I?” You ask, pointing to it. Sam nods and steps out of the way. You push the door open slightly and peek in. Dean is standing over the sink, staring at himself in the mirror.

“Okay. My name is Dean Winchester. Sam is my brother. Ugh, Mary Winchester is my mom. Cast - Cas is my best friend. Y/N is my wi…girlfr…” He stops and you sigh before stepping into the bathroom. 

“Girlfriend,” you provide. He looks over at you then down, embarrassed.

“I’m so sorry.”

“It’s not your fault,” you tell him, leaning back against the door. He walks over quickly and wraps you up in a tight hug as though clinging to your very memory for dear life.

“I don’t remember what he looks like,” he says quietly. You can hear the crack in his voice, the emotion choking him up. You’re fighting tears yourself now.

“Just like you. Your eyes and everything,” you say.

“What’s D.J. even stand for?” He asks, still clinging onto you.

“Dean Junior,” you tell him. He nods and looks down at you. “You didn’t really want to name him after you but I insisted. Cause I want him to be just like his father.” He smiles a little before leaning his forehead against yours. “We’re gonna fix you, Dean. I swear.” There’s a knock on the door and you glance back.

“Y/N, we need to go,” Sam says.

“I’m coming,” you call back to him. You look up at Dean once more and take his face in your hands. You stand up on your toes, closing the distance between the two of you, and kiss him. You had to tell yourself this wouldn’t be the last kiss the two of you would share. “I love you.”

“I love you too,” he tells you. You can’t be sure if he actually means it or if he’s saying it back to spare your feelings at this point. Did he even remember how much you two loved each other? You smile at him before leaving the bathroom and following Sam out the door. Dean rushes out behind you to the desk inside the room. Rowena watches as he jots down a quick note and sticks it in his front pocket. He glances at her and she raises an eyebrow. “Just a reminder…”

**

The three of you get back to the bunker later the next day, Dean’s memories restored. Mary meets you all in the garage, D.J. in her arms. Dean practically bursts from the car and rushes over, taking his son. Mary smiles as she hands him over.

“Glad you’re better,” she says, patting his shoulder. Dean smiles at her before kissing D.J.’s forehead.

“Can’t believe I forgot him,” he says quietly. You smile as you walk past, heading towards the bedroom to put your bags away. Dean watches you go before looking at his mother. “I need your help.” She nods.

“Of course. With what?” She asks. He pulls a piece of paper from his front pocket.

“I don’t remember writing it but…it’s my handwriting. And I mean…” He trails off as he hands the paper to her. She reads it and her eyes widen before looking back up at him.

A few minutes later, Dean comes down to the bedroom and leans against the door frame, watching you. You’re busy taking the clothes from both of your go bags and putting them into the hamper to take care of later. You glance back and smile.

“I figured you’d still be spending time with D.J.”

“Wanted to spend time with you,” he says, walking in. He closes the door before walking over and wrapping his arms around you. You smile as you slip your arms around his neck. He leans in and kisses you gently, his hands sliding over your waist slowly. He pulls away too soon and you lean in again. He laughs lightly. “Hold on.”

“I don’t really want to,” you laugh.

“I wanna give you something,” he says. You raise an eyebrow at him as he reaches into his pocket. He pulls a folded piece of paper out and holds it up between the two of you. “I wrote this at some point during the whole…hexed thing.” You take it, giving him a skeptical look. He seems nervous and you can’t figure out why. You unfold the piece of paper slowly.

Dean. If you survive this, marry Y/N.

It was scratched onto the paper quickly and sloppily but it was for sure Dean’s handwriting. You can’t help the gasp that escapes your lips as you look back up at Dean. He’s watching you, trying to read your face, as he reaches into his pocket once again. This time he produces a ring.

“Oh my god,” you whisper.

“I, ugh…I thought I was going to have to save up to buy a ring but,” he stops and shrugs. “Mom gave me hers. Didn’t even ask. Said she wanted you to have it.”

“Oh my god,” you say again, swallowing thickly.

“Marry me, Y/N?” He asks. You take a shaky breath as the tears finally start to fall.

“Yes,” you tell him. He smiles widely and pulls you in for another kiss. This time you pull away too soon, holding your left hand up. “I want my ring.” He laughs lightly as he looks at it.

“Dad had it inscribed. I didn’t know that. Mom just showed it to me,” he says. You take it and hold it up, trying to read the inside. You smile widely as you make out the two words. They couldn’t have been more true for the two for you. He takes the ring back and slides it onto your left hand before lifting you and tossing you onto the bed.

Forever yours.

****

Forever Tags: @roseblue373

[chvoswxtch]

Macchiato from Frank Castle with a vulnerable Reader (recently escaped abusive relationship or is hiding from such an ex / targeted by the Villain of the Week after being in the wrong place at the wrong time). I'll leave it up to the barista whether or not to put it over ice.

Thanks again, for letting me submit some requests.

you're so very welcome! thanks for stopping by the cafe! 🖤

headcannon below the cut

frank castle makes sure you feel safe

frank could tell that you had a troubled past when he met you. he could see it, & sometimes he could feel it. he didn't pry, figuring you would open up when you were ready, just like he did when he revealed his own traumatic history

when you finally told him about the abusive relationship you escaped with your ex, a lot of things finally clicked. the things he'd noticed & picked up on suddenly made sense. the way you physically tensed whenever there was a loud noise, how you apologized profusely for the most trivial things, your overly cautious nature & hesitancy when it came to intimacy

it broke his heart knowing what you had been through, but more than anything it pissed him off that some asshole had been the one to do it. frank was furious when you told him, a look of pure rage in his eyes & his jaw set in a harsh line. the anger was practically rolling off him in waves & he was insistent on you giving him a name

but the second he saw a flash of fear in your eyes at his reaction, he quickly recomposed himself. he never wanted to scare you. he didn't want to be just another angry man in your house. even though you knew exactly who he was & what he'd done, you felt safe with frank, & he never wanted to ruin that

you were insistent about leaving it alone, not wanting to spend another moment in the past. you just wanted to move forward. frank respected that. but he also tracked that motherfucker down & sent him on a 3 month long vacation to the icu, not that you needed to know that

while frank did everything he could to make sure you felt comfortable, he knew there were certain things he'd have to be patient with you about. you were still healing from a lot of trauma, but he was determined to help you in any way that he could

at least once a month for the first four months of your relationship, frank reminded you that you were safe. sometimes you'd wake up in the middle of the night sobbing from a horrible nightmare, your dreams transporting you back to that dark place, & frank would hold you for as long as you needed, gently rocking you back & forth while stroking your hair, whispering softly in your ear

"shh shh shh, s'alright, baby. you're safe, yeah? I got you. you're alright. deep breaths, baby. no one's ever gonna hurt you again, I promise. you're safe with me, sweetheart."

as hard as frank tries to be mindful, he's human. he has his own trauma that he's still working through. while your issues manifest with fear, his manifest with anger. the first time he loses his temper & raises his voice, the look on your face physically pains him like a knife to the heart

he sees the way your eyes go wide, how you start to slightly tremble, notices that your breathing is more shallow & harsh. the way your eyes become glossy nearly brings him to his knees, & he quickly lifts his hands in a show of peace & takes a step back

"hey...hey, i'm sorry. i'm sorry, sweetheart. I shouldn'ta raised my voice like that. I didn't mean to. i'm not mad at you, alright? you didn't do nothin' wrong. I just...got frustrated. i'm sorry, baby. what...what do ya need? need me to leave? I can step out if you need a minute. just...tell me what you need."

frank doesn't mind that you're hesitant when it comes to intimacy. he lets you take things as slow as you want. he doesn't push you, doesn't try to guilt trip you, just lets you control the pace & follows your lead. whenever you try to apologize about it, he quickly cuts you off with reassurance

"hey, you don't owe me nothin'. i'm just happy to be here, yeah? I got you here with me, that's all I need. don't worry 'bout me, sweetheart. i'm not goin' anywhere."

frank goes to extra lengths to make sure you have peace of mind. he installs a full security system at your place complete with cameras. he makes sure you have pepper spray & a taser with you at all times. he's taken you to the shooting range a few times just to show you how to shoot just in case you ever have to. he's taught you a few self defense moves that you can protect yourself with. he doesn't just want you to feel safe, he wants you to feel strong

frank makes sure you understand that anyone that ever tried to get to you would have to go through him. whenever you're out in public, he's got his arm around you, or he's holding your hand. he's got his eye on you at all times. if he even thinks you look uncomfortable for any reason, he's at your side in a flash

frank is a fierce protector, & there's no one he protects more relentlessly than the people he loves & cares about. he'd wage war on anyone without a second thought just to keep you safe

[thatsmzbitchtoyou]

Run, pretty girl, run Chapter 3

Summary:  Even with the safeguards put in place after the fall of S.H.I.E.L.D., the remaining Avengers find themselves on the run after the American government falls into disarray.  The code word is sent, and they’re officially fugitives.  Bucky makes a run for the safe house set up for emergencies like this where the Avengers are told to meet up, but on the way saves the pregnant agent turned payroll specialist that he was partnered with.  Will they make it before she goes into labor?  Or at all?

Warnings: violence, pregnancy, childbirth, death of minor character, language, eventual smut

“Бегать”: run “Подтвердить” : confirmed “Enkosi”: thank you “Дома”: home “Добро пожаловать”: welcome

Previous chapter Next chapter

They reached Wakanda by midday.  As the stairs opened they were immediately surrounded by the Dora Milaje and a team of doctors that hoisted Y/N onto a gurney and Bucky walked alongside holding her hand until they reached the surgery area of their medical wing.  “I’m sorry, Sergeant Barnes, you cannot come past this point,” Ayo instructed him.

Bucky nodded unhappily and quickly turned to Y/N, leaning down until his face was hovering just over her face.  “I’m gonna be right out here waiting for you,” he promised.  The first tears started to fall out of the corners of her eyes as she nodded.  “Hey, pretty girl,” he said, trying to get her to look at him.  Y/N met his gaze, and his heart broke for the pain he could see swimming in her eyes.  “You, me, and a cocktail in Monaco,” he smiled sadly at her.

Y/N giggled at the inside joke they made for a vacation after successful missions, though it came out a little garbled as she started to choke up.  “Me, you, and a beer in Malta.”

“Sounds perfect,” he chuckled wetly as his own tears started to fall.  Y/N squeezed his hand before the doctors started pushing the gurney through the doors.  Ayo let Bucky watch her until she was out of sight and then led him to the bedrooms.  The room that Shuri’s family had made for him, even though he rarely used it even when he was there, was still just as he’d left it.  

“Get yourself cleaned up, rest, and we’ll come let you know when she’s out of surgery,” she said quietly.

“Enkosi,” Bucky replied.

Ayo looked at him for a moment, clapping his shoulder then leaving.  Once the door was closed behind her he made his way to the bathroom.  As he stripped out of his dirty, torn clothes and got in the shower he let the events of the day finally wash over him.  He cried heavily at the loss of Y/N’s baby, how it didn’t matter what he’d tried or done, he couldn't save them all.  He cried over the exhaustion of yet another government entity chasing him, and he still didn’t know why.  Another fight, another battle, another loss.  He cried for Y/N and how much she had to endure, and would endure, from this day forward.  He loved her as a friend and a partner, and trusted her with his life.  He loved her as more, and had been wanting more, but she didn’t need that right now.  When he was done he got dressed in the clothes provided for him, then walked back down to the waiting area near the med bay.

A couple of hours later a doctor came out with Shuri.  “She’s doing well,” he informed Bucky.  “We were able to remove the baby without further complications.  She is in recovery now.”

“Can I see her?” Bucky asked, glancing at Shuri.

“Yes,” the doctor replied.  “She’s not fully awake yet.”

“I’ll come with you,” Shuri said.  She led him through the med bay to one of the adjoining rooms.  Y/N was laying on the bed, slightly propped up, dressed in a medical gown with an IV in her hand, looking like they had bathed her.  She was asleep, her breathing heavy as Bucky walked to her, pulling the chair by the wall over so he could sit next to the bed.  He reached out and held her hand, his thumb rubbing her knuckles gently.  She only had a few bruises and cuts from the crash, but her belly was no longer large, only a slight bump left.  He fought off another wave of tears.  Shuri walked to the other side of her, taking her other hand.  “You are both welcome to stay here as long as you need,” she said quietly.  

“Thank you,” Bucky said.  “Do you know what’s happening?”

Shuri sighed and folded her arms.  “The American government has fallen.  Like S.H.I.E.L.D. all those years ago.”

“Was it Hydra?” he asked.

“No. It’s an invasion of a species called the Skrulls.”

Bucky sighed.  He’d been informed of this alien species that had turned up on Earth many years ago, and the possibility that some of them may attempt to overthrow governments and take over, but none of it had been confirmed as far as he knew.  Obviously the invasion had begun.  “It’s not just the American government, is it?” he asked.

Shuri nodded.  “Britain, France, Germany, Russia, North Korea, Japan, China, and parts of South America have been compromised.  We’re not sure who to trust.”

Bucky rubbed his temple with his free hand.  “Have you heard from anyone else yet?”

“Yes.  Most of the remaining Avengers have reached out in some capacity.  We have locked down everything here, but they are still planning on meeting in Sibiu before making any other further preparations.  We are also being monitored very heavily.  I could get you to Sibiu, but that’s about it at the moment without raising suspicion,” she said, sounding tired.

“What a shitshow,” Y/N whispered.

Shuri and Bucky turned sharply to look at her.  “Hey, pretty girl,” Bucky smiled, standing so he could be eye to eye with her.  

Y/N gave him a small smile, her eyes fluttering.  “Heya, hot stuff,” she smirked, making him chuckle.  She looked at Shuri.  “Hi sweetie,” she breathed.

Shuri took a step forward and smiled at her.  “Hello love,” she said quietly.  “How are you feeling?”

“Like I was in a car crash,” Y/N said, cocking an eyebrow.

Shuri chuckled as she pushed on one of her Kimoyo beads.  “I’m sure.”

The next moment the doctor came back in.  “Miss Y/L/N,” he greeted her as he walked up next to Shuri.  He gave her a pitiful smile, gently poking and prodding her in different areas and checking her over.  “Everything went well.  I’m very sorry for your loss.  We wanted to wait until you were awake to ask if you wanted to see the baby before…” he drifted off, unsure how to proceed.

Bucky squeezed Y/N’s hand as her eyebrows knitted together.  Her free hand moved to her stomach, where it was noticeably smaller than before.  She shut her eyes tight and bit her lower lip.  He leaned down and awkwardly hugged her, his face in the crook of her neck.  “Whatever you choose, I will support you.  I’m here for you,” he whispered into her ear.  Y/N nodded, her hand moving up to pat his hair.

“Can I just…can I just see him?” she asked quietly, swallowing harshly.

“Yes,” the doctor said, turning to the nurse by the door who nodded.  

Bucky stayed next to Y/N, Shuri moving to be by the head of the bed as the same nurse came back a minute later looking sad and holding a small bundle in her arms.  She walked over and Y/N sat up more, wincing slightly.  

“Would you like to hold him, Miss Y/L/N?” the nurse asked quietly.  

Y/N stared at the blanket in her arms for a moment before slowly nodding her head.  She opened her arms and the nurse settled the baby into them.  Y/N sat back and held him against her chest, staring at him as her tears silently fell.  Bucky looked down at the tiny human in her arms, marveling at just how small he was.  He looked almost completely normal except for the muted shade of his skin, like he was just sleeping.  No one spoke, no one moved, as they all let her have the moment with her son.

“Isn’t he beautiful, Buck?” Y/N whispered.

Bucky nodded and sniffed as he looked down at them.  “Yes,” he said.  “Just like his Mama.”

Y/N huffed a laugh as she reached a hand up and traced his face with her finger softly.  “You know, I was gonna name him Grant, after Steve’s middle name?” she mused.  Bucky sucked in a sharp breath.  She had never disclosed what she wanted to name him, saying she hadn’t decided yet, but she had been wanting to surprise Bucky with honoring his best friend.  She had also been friends with Steve before he left, and he was touched that she thought so highly of him.  “Grant James Y/L/N…my son…” she whispered.  Bucky sniffled at the use of his first name.  Y/N looked up at him and smiled through her tears.  “Thank you for taking such good care of us, Buck,” she sighed, then looked down at Grant one more time before kissing his nose.  She looked at the nurse and gave him back to her.  The nurse nodded to Y/N then the doctor and walked back out with Grant.  Y/N watched until they were out of sight, then turned on her side facing Bucky, grabbing his hand tightly and bringing it close to her face.  “When do we leave?” she asked quietly, squeezing his hand and keeping her eyes shut tight.

Bucky’s brow furrowed at her question.  “We don’t need to leave yet, Y/N.  We can figure all that out later–”

“When do we leave?” Y/N asked again, more firmly this time.

Bucky looked at the doctor.  “We’d like to keep you overnight at least, just to monitor your progress, otherwise everything looks like it’s mostly superficial cuts and bruises that should heal fine.  We can give you a solution to help dry up any milk that comes in, but you may still get some, and you will still bleed for a few weeks until your body heals from being pregnant,” he said matter-of-factly.  “But we can send anything you need with you when you’re ready to leave.”

“Okay.  Thank you,” she said in a clipped tone, a clear dismissal.  The doctor nodded and gave a deeper head bow to Shuri before leaving the room.

“I will give you some space,” Shuri said after he left.  “I’ll come back later to check on you,” she said, reaching over and squeezing Y/N’s shoulder.  Y/N nodded and whispered a thanks as Shuri walked out.

Bucky waited until she left then leaned down again to be eye level with Y/N.  She still had her eyes shut, her breaths huffing hot against his knuckles as she tried to keep her composure.  He leaned in and kissed her hand, keeping his forehead rested against her’s.  Y/N finally opened her eyes and looked at him.  He didn’t know what to say, so he stayed quiet, just staring at her, letting her do what she needed to get through the next little while.  She stared back at him, the tears building again and her face pinching in pain.  She let out a shudder and a sob that she tried to bite back.  Bucky’s other hand came up and pushed her hair back, scratching along her scalp, his own tears falling at her pain.

“H-help me,” Y/N cried, gripping his hand with surprising strength.

“What do you need, pretty girl?” Bucky whispered.

“I don’t know!” she wailed.  “I…my heart hurts.”

Bucky instantly climbed into the bed with her, which definitely was not big enough for the two of them, but he didn’t care.  He maneuvered her so her IV wouldn’t get ripped out, tucking her into his body, holding her as she sobbed against him.  Her hands gripped his shirt, her tears soaking it through, her breath heating his chest as his arm cradled her neck and head and the other pulled her into him by her back, her legs tangling with his as he moved one of the blankets over the both of them.  He continued whispering whatever he could think of to her, kissing her hair, her forehead then down the side of her face, pulling one of her hands up and kissing it along her knuckles and then over her palm.

“I’m so sorry Mamas,” he said.  “I wish I could fix it for you.  I tried, I really tried…” he broke down crying with her as she wrapped an arm around his back.

“It’s not your fault.  It’s not mine.  It’s no one’s but them,” she whispered, nuzzling her face into the crook of his neck.  “Like I said, you took such good care of me, of us…thank you,” she said, then kissed his jaw.  “Thank you…”

They held each other as they cried, mourning the loss of what could have been, but wasn’t meant to be.

@vioplay19 @mrsnikstan @scott-loki-barnes @tufflepuff23

[beautifulfuckup99]

since you do SMUT, I must have a min Yoongi 1-sh0t. I'm BEGGING!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

It'd be my pleasure! Lol

Title: Making it official

Warning(s): D!rty talk, Curs!ng (A lot of F-Bombs dropped), Dom!Yoongi, Public S!x, Unprotected S!x (Be safe, guys!), Sp!ting in mouth, Breed!ng K!nk, and some A!r Play K!nk

Author's Note: Read at your own risk. You have been warned! Lol!

***********************************

“This... Is nice.” You say gently as you sit across from Yoongi. The restaurant you two were sat at was a laid-back BBQ one and it’s clear, Yoongi had probably used Jin’s knowledge of food to pick this place out.

Actually, it’s clear Yoongi used MULTIPLE people’s help to plan this out for you. You eye Yoongi a bit closer. He’d been away on tour for so long that you had gotten used to only seeing him on your phone screen.

“Really? You like it?” He asks as if relieved, and you hum gently. This was awkward. It had to be though. Last time you two had spoken was right after hooking up for the first time...

You told him that a FWB arrangement just wasn't for you, and that you wanted something more official, but... Yoongi was scared. Scared of how toxic ARMY members would treat you. Scared that the public eye would scare you away. So, you two agreed to just stay friends. And then he ran off to tour.

But here he was now. Taking you off to Hawaii for a mini birthday vacation. And it was amazing. Because it wasn’t him. This wasn’t something he’d normally do. But he was doing it for you. And that had to count for something.

“Hey. Remember what we used to do?” Yoongi asks finally as he finishes his third drink of the night.

You pause at the question and eye his wicked smirk, trying to ignore the fire that it so effortlessly started in your core.

“We used to do a lot of stuff...” you tease, acting neutral on the outside. Yoongi laughs softly and blushes a bit at the innuendo.

"No. Dirty." He snorts humorously. "Follow my lead." He says just as a waitress walks over.

“Refill?” She asks and Yoongi smirks and nods. “Um... why not. It is our wedding night after all.” Yoongi says casually and the waitress pauses.

“Wait, really?” She asks and you stiffen a laugh, catching on instantly. Oh god. Not this same trick! Yoongi and you loved doing this at restaurants because it always ended in you getting something for free. You used to do this a lot as teenagers, and the fact that even now, in all of his much-deserved fame, he still remembered it? It just showed nothing had actually... Changed between you two.

“Yup! Went to the courthouse today...” You play along and the waitress gasps happily.

“Oh! Give me one second.” She says fast before rushing off.

You turn to Yoongi and shake your head playfully. “You’re still just as sneaky as before.” You tease and Yoongi laughs. “What? Me?!” He gasps playfully.

You hum. “I said what I said...” you laugh softly, giving Yoongi soft eyes.

*****************************************

After getting your dinner for free, and an expensive wine bottle that’s also on the house, you two decided to head back to the hotel that night and wash up for bed. Yoongi had booked one room with two beds and you had shrugged it off, thinking it wasn’t that big of a deal.

Yoongi showers first as you take off your jewelry and heels, and wipe off your makeup. When he comes out in boxers and a shirt, you slip past him, ignoring the way he eyed you.

The tension between you two was clear all day. At breakfast, at the beach, during lunch, afterwards when you were tanning by the pool. And again, at dinner. You could tell Yoongi was holding back on something.

The shower is nice and hot, and you wash every inch of yourself before getting out. You throw on a robe and walk out of the bathroom. Yoongi is already sat on the edge of the bed, watching you.

“Go ahead. Spill it. Whatever’s got you thinking so hard.” You say finally with a soft chuckle.

He presses his lips together, as if thinking about how he’s going to phrase the next few words before giving up. Instead, he looks at you, eyes soft and colored dark. You pause. You know that look. He’s giving you those eyes...

You blush almost instantly. “You..." You shift a bit but stay in your spot by the bathroom. "Now, Mr. Min Yoongi..." You mutter, deciding to tease a bit. "Are you giving me bedroom eyes? Huh?” You joke with a snort, trying to make light of this situation, but your heart is practically racing in your chest.

“Can we?” He whispers softly, voice deep and calm, as he looks up at you some more, rubbing his hands on his boxers slowly. You shift a bit. Could you? Could you actually break your promise to yourself and give in?

You shift the weight from one foot to the other. “I... I don’t know. Will tomorrow be the same?” You ask gently as you cross your arms around yourself slightly.

“I don’t think so. Because tonight, I... I wanna...” He takes a deep breath. “I just wanna claim you.” He finally says, honesty plain as day in his tone. It makes you blush. You stand up straighter too, in hopes that fixing your posture would stop you from melting to your knees the second his eyes roam your body and his tongue pokes out to lick his lips.

“Claim me?” You whisper, trying to play it off like it's the cringiest thing you've ever heard.

He nods slowly. “The way a wife should be claimed...” He whispers softly, referring to the restaurant game you two had just played earlier this evening. You snort at that.

“Oh? Wanna play married couple?” You try and joke, but your small smile falters the second he looks at you, completely serious. It makes you take a pause.

“And..." You hold yourself. "How... How should... A wife be claimed?” You finally ask, slightly giving in to the fantasy. The stare down you two were having was an unbreakable one. One that told more words than what you were actually speaking. He needed you. You could see it clear as day. And it made you whole body heat up...

“Like it’s the most important thing to me. Like having your body to myself is... Just as necessary as the air that I breathe.” He says. You swallow a bit.

“You’ll have to show me how it’s done.” You finally say, voice soft and coming out as a whisper, as if you were being squished by the tension in this room. You needed actions though. No more words. You needed to see him actually claim you. Actually say you were his. Not just a friend who he’d sleep with once when the alcohol kicked in.

He slowly stands up from the bed, and walks over to you, causing you to back yourself up against the wall. His hands start to roam your sides. His fingers worm their way into undoing your robe as he watches your face with gentle eyes, as if waiting to see if you'd stop him.

You don't.

You watch him as your breath stays stuck in your throat, and he pulls one hand away from your robe tie to place on your cheek. He strokes his thumb back and forth across your cheek bone, and his other hand tugs at your tie, causing your robe to fall open. He gives you one last look, silently asking, and you nod at his silent question. He slowly lowers himself on to his knees and you look down at him with your cheeks bright pink.

“I’ll only ever kneel for you.” He admits quietly before grabbing your hips to kiss along your stomach. Your stomach flutters at that, and you look down at him with a soft giggle. “You’re… you’d never have to kneel for me...” You try as you run your fingers through his shaggy black hair.

“Well, how else can I feel you on my face?” He asks simply as he keeps eye contact with you before lightly grabbing and moving your leg over his good shoulder. He kisses and bites down on different parts of your inner thigh, just enjoying the feel of your soft skin against his lips and cheek. You gently run your fingers through his hair and hum, head falling back against the wall, feeling at peace. “That feels... so good.” You sigh.

He looks up at you. “It should...” He whispers before slowly licking along your wet slot tenderly. You shiver slightly.

“I-It should?” You whisper.

“Mm... You taste so good...” he mutters against your pussy before sucking softly on your clit, rubbing his tongue on the tip of your clit as he sucks and holds it between his lips. Your back arches and you cry out softly, hips rolling against his mouth as you grip his hair as if holding him in place.

He picks you up and practically sits you on his shoulders as he moans against you, lapping at your pussy more eagerly now.

“O-Oh my god! Sh-Shoulder...” You gasp, instantly worried about hurting him. He pulls back and smirks.

"Any pain I get will be well worth it." He whispers before sucking hard on your clit, causing the curling heat in your stomach to get stronger.

“So pretty...” Yoongi breathes out right against your pussy before he dives right back in to eat you out, looking up at you. His eyes roll back slightly as if tasting you was his ecstasy.

He slurps at your clit before tongue fucking you, using his nose to nudge at your clit. You’re pressed against the wall with his face pressed against you and he’s using a free hand to touch himself as you leak on his face.

You feel every moan and groan he lets out as he focuses on your pleasure that was obviously giving him pleasure. Your back aches and Yoongi pulls back only a bit, a thin line of your wetness or his saliva connecting your pussy to his slightly puffy lips.

"Look at me." He orders and you pant hard, looking down at him instantly, feeling completely worshipped. You shiver slightly when you see him palming his cock through his boxers. Your cheeks flush deeply. “My god...” you groan at the sight.

“That’s right baby. I'm your god now. Say my name. My beautiful wife...” Yoongi taunts against your clit. It twitches at the vibration.

“Hm, fuck... Y-Yoongi. Call me your wife again,” you pant, body shaking slightly at the vibrations.

“My wife. My perfect fucking wife...” he moans before tongue fucking you faster as you begin to tremble. Your eyes roll back, and you cry out.

“I need to cum,” you call out, loudly. Your head falls back, and you hold his hair tightly to hold him deeper against you.

“Cum. Cum on my face. Oh, baby. My baby. My wife.” Yoongi pants breathlessly. Your back arches and you cry out loudly, eyes fluttering as you cum against his face. Yoongi licks it all up and then sets you down before yanking the tie off of your robe.

Your legs are trembling as he wraps the tie around your neck like a leash. "Get on your knees." He orders against your lips and you smirk, taking this as a chance to prove you were just as good as him.

You get on your knees in front of him and focus on trailing your tongue along his hard bulge through his boxers, reaching up to grab at the hem of them only to feel a tug on your new leash. "No hands." He growls, completely serious. You blush hard and hold your hands behind your back as he makes you look up at him.

"Open." Is all he says and you open your mouth, tongue falling out to hang outside of your mouth. "Fuck. Why do you look so prefect like that?" He shivers softly before using one hand to free his already fully hardened length.

You drool at the thought of it sliding into your mouth, and when he hits your tongue with it, you moan. God it was hard and heavy. And from the sight of pre-cum on the tip, you knew he was more than ready for you to return the favor.

You try wrapping your lips around it, but he hovers it above your mouth, tauntingly. "Beg." He orders, stroking his length slightly, lazily gathering more pre-cum at the tip.

"Please. Please. Let me taste it..." You pant, mind fully gone at this point. All you wanted was him at this point. Nothing else mattered.

"You're so hot..." He pants softly and leans down to kiss you, sucking softly on your tongue as you moan. He pulls back and spits the mixture of his and your spit back in your mouth before reaching two fingers into your mouth to rub it into your tongue and push his fingers down your throat, causing you to choke. More drool drips down your face and he rubs it in, moaning at how wet your mouth was for him.

He yanks at the tie around your neck, pulling your head closer to his cock, that's now twitching in anticipation. You moan excitedly and hold your mouth open as he finally slides the first two inches into your mouth, moaning in relief.

It eggs you on to keep going. You suck him off sloppily, working more as a vacuum cleaner than a person from how fast Yoongi was bobbing your head up and down his hard shaft. He moans loudly and looks down at you, his tongue slowly poking out to lick his bottom lip, giving out a breathy chuckle. "You drive me crazy..." He pants.

You moan against his shaft and the vibrations run through his dick. "Oh fuck..." He gasps sharply. "You take it so fucking," He pauses to pull your head further down to see how deep he could go. You feel his tip hit the back of your throat and gag, eyes watering as you hear him moan louder, so you focus on breathing through your nose. "G-Good! Good... Good girl..." He gasps out. He lets go of your head and you back up to breathe fully, trying to catch up on your breathing as your heart raced and the ache between your legs returns in tenfold.

He grabs your chin and leans down to kiss you deeply. “I want you. So bad...” He whispers against your lips before moving to kiss and bite along your neck. He then stands up and yanks at the tie around your neck. "Crawl." He smirks and you blush hard, feeling embarrassed, but doing as he said. You couldn't deny it anymore. You loved this new side of him...

He leads you outside, on to the balcony, and picks you up in an instant. He presses you against the railing. You hear the sounds of the ocean and feel the cool island night air against your hot skin since your robe is hanging on your shoulders now. Yoongi grips your ass and holds you against his crutch, you feel his cock pressing against your slot and whine softly as you grind your hips against it, causing him to groan. “You’re soaking me so fucking good...” He pants as he grinds against you.

You pant hard, head rolling back. That's when it all comes back to you. The reality of your current situation. You look around with wide eyes. “O-On the balcony?” You squeak in surprise.

Without missing a beat, Yoongi slides his tip into you, causing you to melt into a puddle of hurried pants and soft gasps. “I wanna make sure you see stars.” He whispers against your open mouth as he takes his time slowly sliding into you. “You feel me, baby?” He whispers as you nod hurriedly.

"M-More. More." You beg fast.

He smirks and shoves the rest of the way inside of you, causing you to moan loudly while he bites back his own sound of pleasure. "Getting a little loud there..." He taunts and you shiver.

“Of course, I am! You're... You’re so big...” You moan out as you wrap your legs around his waist.

“Mm... All fucking yours, baby...” He shivers, blinded with lust.

“Oh fuck.” You groan as you arch your back and start to grind your hips with his cock deep inside of you, moving with your hips. You angle your hips and moan, head rolling back as his tip finally hits that good spot. "Ri-Right there!" You practically plead as your arms go around his neck so you can dig your nails into the back of his shoulders.

“Oh fuck...” He hisses at the scratching. He fucks you harder and reaches up to grab your neck. “You’re so… fuck, you’re so fucking good. So sexy...” He shivers. You hum happily as he grabs your neck, and groan.

“How often did you think about this? Railing me... For everyone to see?” You pant. “Did it get you through tour?” You whisper in a taunting tone as he fucks you rougher.

“So. Fucking. Often.” He grunts through each thrust he gives you. “Almost every fucking night I thought about you.” He pants and hits your sweet spot relentlessly. It's like an endless wave of pleasure, only building higher. A loud moan escapes you before you can stop yourself. “Put on a show, baby. Get fucking loud.” Yoongi growls in your ear before he smacks your ass hard. Your head falls back now, not caring that you were so vulnerable on the railing, because you knew Yoongi had you. You just cry out for him, loudly, calling out his name repeatedly into the tropical night air.

“That’s my good fucking girl. You like being fucked? Hm?” He taunts as he makes you look at the stars by holding on to your hair. They just seem to get brighter with the pleasure. You two were up on the 18th floor and the air just felt thinner up here. You felt higher here.

“God, yes! I fucking love it! Fuck me! Own me!” You call out, not caring about modest behavior anymore. You felt so... Needed at this moment. It was a struggle to keep your eyes focused, let alone open. You were definitely seeing those stars now.

Yoongi pulls out of you and before you can whine about your pussy walls clenching against nothing, he turns you around, so you’re bent over and holding the railing. He starts fucking you faster from behind as he grips your hips harder. You know there’ll be a bruise tomorrow. But you don't care. You can't care. Not now. Not with this being the best pleasure of your life.

With a hand entangled in your hair, he pulls your head back and starts whispering in your ear that anyone can look up at you at any moment and see you getting fucked. That this is how he was claiming you. You were his. Anyone that saw you two would know that. That he was taken. His hand stays tight around your hair while the other one moves to rub your clit.

You fuck your hips back against him, moaning at the idea of people seeing you being so unapologetically his. Your eyes roll back and with no warning, you didn’t trust your voice anyways, you cum on his cock and hand, making a drippy mess.

“Oh, you really like that, don’t you...” Yoongi moans happily, not letting up. Something in him just needed to have you. Fully. He pulls you right against his chest and kiss along your neck. You whimper at the relentless thrusting. This time, it's slow and purposeful, like he was using your tight walls to jerk off his throbbing member. “Say. It.” He orders in your ear.

“I like it! I love it! I-I’m so fucking wet for you!” You practically purr and turn your head to bite down on his pulse point to stay quiet. He moans at the pain. “F-Fuck… Fuck, I’m going to cum...” You whimper against his skin. His neck has a deep bite mark in it now. You can't help but find it beautiful on his skin.

“Beg.” He grunts out, making you look at him as you feel his cock swell inside you. He was so close.

“Please. Please... Yoongi...” You beg quietly, so close to creaming his cock. He spreads your legs more, so your pussy is on display, and he rubs your clit fast and hard as he fucks you right against the railing now. The cool metal of it is pressed against your sweaty skin. It felt so good...

Your back arches and you moan his name in his ear, cumming again. “Oh fuck. Yes. Yes, Y/N..." He gasps out as you milk his cock. "I’m gonna breed you.” He growls, deciding in that one moment that he had to make you fully his. It makes you giggle, sex drunk by now.

“Do it… fucking do it!” You moan eagerly. He gives a few more pumps before shooting his load right in you. You barely have time to enjoy the feeling before he's picking you up.

“I’m not done with you yet.” He grunts, blinded by lust. You squeal as he carries you inside the hotel room.

**************************************

“Do you think someone caught us?” You whisper as you rub his shoulder lazily.

“And if they did?” He snorts and you chuckle.

“You wouldn't wanna deal with management.” You try, voice soft and slightly distant. You only come back to the reality of you laying in this bed with your best friend when he holds you more firmly.

“I’m a grown man, Y/N. Life is so short. Being scared that I can get in trouble for loving you? It’s not fair to either of us.” He whispers gently. You pause and look up at him.

“L-Love?" You blush hard. He chuckles.

"I’m done trying to please people. I want you.” He says as he gives you a look of adoration. It makes you blush. Yoongi grabs his phone, and you pull the sheets up to your nose.

“What are you doing?!” You giggle and Yoongi hums.

“Giving everyone the heads up...” he says simply.

He takes a selfie with your hair sprawled over his face and chest. Your face is not in the photo though. He posts it on to his Instagram with the caption: “Just me and you🖤”.

It makes you cover your mouth and stare at him in awe before you kiss him lovingly.

“Thank you...” You blush before hugging him tighter. He laughs and shies away as you roll on top of him to kiss all over his face eagerly.

[xllizs]

Surfs up! Lifeguard!Toji x bad surfer!Reader

not rlly proof read / TAGS: Smut w/ plot, Age gap (reader is 22 and toji is 30) size kink, size difference, all characters are 18+, low-key bimbo coded but not rlly, pet names (ex. doll), praise, lifeguard, beach, surfer, hotel room sex, toji with a white tank top and red trunks (and a whistle), life guard tall chair things but a big one, extra character(s): gojo (ps. if toji is spelt "tori" please don't bring it up, I hate my MacBook.)

Today you were gonna surf,

At least that's what you told yourself this morning.

You got outside of your hotel with the strong scent of sea salt, remembering how close you were to the beach. You had a bikini on while holding your hot pink and white surf board.

You used to surf so much when you were younger, but after college you really haven't. You decided this vacation was it.

The hotel you booked was practically on the beach with great waves that amazed you. You had to take the opportunity!

As you strutted down the railing you spot a black haired man on his way back from the lifeguard tower,

and oh god, he was hot.

You almost trip over yourself from staring at him while walking. His tank top fit him so well and hugged all the right places. The way his whistle bounced off his chest when he walked, you swore your mouth was watering. But you can't let him distract you. You told yourself you would surf!

You sprint a little toward a nice spot to sit at, "Hey!" You hear a shout and freeze. You look towards where the noise came from "Yeah?" you shout back. You realize its the black haired man from earlier.

"You surfing?" he questions you.

You look at him, then your surf board, and back at him, "Yeah I am" your brows furrow, confused on why he's asking. "We are just trying to let everyone know that the current is really strong today, so just be careful." he alerts you with a small smile.

You look at the ocean and wince but look back at him "Ohh alright, thank you!"

its not that you aren't a good swimmer, you just aren't a strong swimmer.

Looking around there aren't too many people right now at the beach, just surfers. You assume the lack of people is because of the harsh water. You set your stuff down and sit on your chair for a few minutes.

You take off your sunglasses and grab your board out of the sand and head towards the ocean.

Stepping into the ocean, its cold but not terrible. You continue walking into the water until you're hips deep and start to swim out more

The waves were HUGE. you jump to avoid them until you find the one you want.

That one. That's the one you tell yourself

You pick up a pace with moving your arms quick. You get a grip on your board and start to stand up on it and catch the wave! You couldn't believe yourself! You're doing it. You're in the air, you lean back and forth a little but catch yourself. But you suddenly fall off. even though you just fell, that was amazing. You forgot about the thrill.

You decide to start to head back to shore but you realize you're having a hard time swimming back. Fuck me. you say out loud.

Suddenly, a whistle blows.

"She's not even that far out, Toji." Gojo says rolling his eyes at the black haired man.

"The currents pulling her," he says putting his eyes back on the binoculars, "can she not hear my whistle?" he sighs, putting the whistle around his neck into his mouth, blowing it again. He points in your direction and signals to come closer to the shore. He opens his mouth for the whistle to drop down. Toji sits down on the tall and wide life guard chair. "I don't think she can get back to shore.." Gojo says, "I'll go" he says.

"No, I got it" Toji says putting his arm in front of the man.

Toji takes his whistle off and sits it next to gojo. He stands up on one of the steps, cross his arms and takes his tank top off , he jumps off of the tower and grabs a orange rescue tube.

FUCK! Is he coming over here?? You feel the current still pulling you and you keep trying to swim, hopefully making progress. You felt terrible and embarrassed. He even warned you!

You watched as he runs quickly into the water and dives right in, he swims faster than you ever could.

"You alright?" he worries. "Yeah, I just can't swim back. Im so so so sorry!! I thought I could swim back." you say with a pout.

"Don't worry about it, doll. Its my job" he responds with a chuckle

that nickname. shit. he's even hotter up close.

He throws a orange thingy towards you and you grab on

"You got it?"

"Yes!" you reply while using the other hand to hold your board.

He holds onto the other end and he starts to swim back with you, and he's just as fast as he looked. Soon enough you were back on shore and you pause right before you give him back the orange thing.

His wet hair, his v line, his abs. he was so fit.

you realized the longer than it should've been pause and give it to him. he notices your eyes analyzing his body, he does the same too you. He thought you were the prettiest surfer he's ever seen, maybe surfer isn't the best word.

"Thank you so much again..I'm really sorry." you repeat.

His expression softens and he gives you a reassuring look, "Look, its really okay. That was probably the easiest thing Ive ever done anyways. Im glad I saw you when I did." He says again with a small smile.

"That makes me feel better haha,"

that laugh, your voice. he didn't wanna stop talking to you.

"I was so embarrassed. I haven't even- FUCK OW!" You scream out. Tojis head whips back towards you rushing to your side. something pierced your foot, the pain makes you whimper.

He says you hop up onto one foot, "Here let me see." he says. He places one hand rubbing your back and the other holding your foot. "Oooh shit. that's a seashell. Its pretty deep too, but don't panic. I'll bring you over to where the first aid kit is ok?"

You nod your head and whimper when he touches close to the cut. "Im sorry honey."

You might be in pain but that nickname makes your face heat up.

"I can't walk over there, though." you say with tears in your eyes from the pain you got when you tried relaxing your foot.

"I'll carry you, no big deal."

before you have time to speak, he lifts you up and carries you bridal style towards where he sat before.

"Yo, Gojo! Get the first aid ready!!" he shouts out

You arrive and he sits you next to his friend, who you assumed was named Gojo.

"Okay Gojo, grab her stuff and I'll clean up her cut."

"Ight" Gojo says, he couldn't have been that much older than you, he was wearing a tropical button up that was open so you saw under, and red trunks. You point towards where your stuff is.

"Okay doll, I'm just going pull it out with tweezers and clean it ok? While I take it out I want you to squeeze my hand if it hurts. The cleaning won't be any better 'cause I really think its infected."

You nod and grab his hand. He takes the tweezers and gets a good grip. "Okay, 1, 2,3.." he pulls and you squeeze while your eyes water and you start shedding tears, once again whimpering at the pain. he hears you choke up on your tears and quickly looks up and back, "its ok baby I got you, its almost out. You're ok."

You breathe in and out calming yourself, being embarrassed of the big baby you're being right now. But it hurt so bad.

You feel relief but still pain when you realize its out

"Got it!" He smiles at you while grabbing stuff to clean it with.

"Hey, lets not focus on your foot, aye? What's your name and you live around here?"

you cringe at the coldness from the cleaning product he's using, "Uhh, I'm y/n, I don't live around here, but I came here cause its been a good few months since I graduated college. I really needed to surf again cause I was so good, clearly, I'm rusty" you give a breathless laugh and sigh at yourself. "Haha, well I'm Toji. By the way, I could tell you didn't live around here already, I would've noticed a gorgeous girl like you a while ago." he smirks. Your cheeks heat up again and you don't even feel the pain anymore. you realize you should flirt back. You sigh and say "I'm glad I had such a hot lifeguard save me" smiling at him

toji swears all blood rushes to his dick as he gets a boner from what you say.

You guys talk more and you realize the man is 30, but it doesn't bother you that you guys flirted. He flirted way more in the conversation you had though. Talking about your bathing suit, the way you smiled, how your eyes were shining in the sun. He was such a sly man.

At the point, Gojo had brought your stuff back and went into the lifeguard tower.

Toji wraps up your foot. He holds your hand as you walk down the 3 large steps. "Thank you so much, how can I repay you?" you wonder and stare at him, "no need doll, let me walk you back. You said you were here for vacation right? I'm assuming its one of these hotels?" he questions you, you point to the one you were staying at.

He grabs your things and wraps an arm around you, queuing you to wrap your arm around him for support.

You arrive and you guys take the elevator. The elevator shakes a little causing you to fall towards toji. He stares at you and kisses you. you close your eyes. he kisses you so good. his mouth kisses you down towards your neck and he sucks on it, making you moan. the elevator dings once it arrives at your floor. He tries not to hurt your foot but he can't wait to fuck you, so he picks you up. You put your keycard against the lock and it flashes green. He opens the door and slams it shut. dropping you onto the bed.

He starts kissing you hard while his dick grinds against you. with your bathing suit not being heavy the feeling causes you to moan. Like he did in the elevator he moves his way down sucking hard in different parts of your neck. leaving marks everywhere he went. As he is sucking down on your neck his hand finds its way to the bottom of your bikini. he puts his hand under it and rubs your clit. you moan. he kisses his way down to your boobs and takes of ur top with one hand. you were so wet from everything he was doing. the way he touched your clit so well. the way he was rubbing circles and your nipples and sucking on your tits. the way he kissed you. you have never felt better.

"Toji- fuck!" he moves down pulling his fingers out of your bottoms so he can take them off. he spreads your legs far apart. and starts eating you out. his tongue licks your clit so well. he sticks his fingers in you, starting with 2. he thrusts in and out and finds your g spot cause of how you moaned when he touched it.

his fingers curl against it multiple times. you squeeze around them. he thrusts them in so fast. "oh my fuck! don't stop toji please aw!" you whine out.

he curls against it again and you cum.

you pant out catching your breathe

"holy fuck oh my god."

hes not done with you. not even close to being done.

he sticks his tongue inside of you while rubbing your clit with his hand.

"fuck toji! please just fuck me already!"

he takes his tongue out and stands up from being bent down.

"You gotta beg for what you want baby." he says with a smirk, his dick so visibly hard.

"Please toji. please fuck me." you beg with a whimper.

"Good girl."

He takes his trunks off and he dick leaks with precum it was so hard. it was so big. your eyes widened. "holy fuck" you whisper. toji chuckles at your reaction, "you got a condom?" you shake your head in response "im on birth control"

after you said that, he wastes no time.

he takes your legs and drags you closer to the end of the bed and pushes your legs to your chest.

he strokes his dick and moves it up and down to get some of your slick on it. he purposely moves more on your clit making you whine out.

he starts to push his tip in. you've never taken a dick this big. he keeps going until his tip kisses your cervix. you moan when it hits places your fingers could never. '"god you're so tight." he groans. "so full, toji mmmm" you slurr out.

he pulls all the way out and quickly thrusts back in "fuck oh fuck!" you cry out "feels so good"

his thrusts are a little slow, but it isn't long until he goes fast.

the speed he was going was insane. you couldn't take it. it was unreal. you squeezed around him. "your pussy is taking my dick so good." the sounds of your body connecting was so loud. the sound of your wet cunt was just as loud. you moans sync with every time he touches your g spot. "ohh..myy..fuckk" your words coming out every time he thrust back in. you couldn't even speak. he was fucking you brainless. you were seeing stars "does my baby feel good?" he says with a groan after.

you open your mouth to speak but all that came out was a moan "Can't even fucking talk, babys fucked dumb huh?" he laughs you squeezed against his dick making him groan. he slows down, teasing you. "fuck toji-im gonna- cum im fucking- summing!!!" you cry out moaning you spasm against him but he doesn't stop. he's fucking you through your orgasm. "fuckkk how are you still going oh my god!" you are drooling so much. you can't take it.

after your, you can't even remember how many times you came. he still hasn't even shown any signs of cumming.

he goes slow and pulls all the way out and pushes back in again. you couldn't take it. he goes fast, but his thrust start getting sloppier. "gonna cum. gonna fill you up." he says catching his breath. he goes really fast again with a few more thrusts. slowing down again. then he comes. it felt so good. you were on cloud 9. you couldn't even speak.

he pulls out and moves you against the beds pillows, laying next to you.

"visit here again, okay?" he says still catching his breath.

NOTES: im sorry if my grammars bad or some seems rushed!! I thought of this after I went to the beach yesterday and the Current was SOOO strong!! these girls needed help and this hot lifeguard did exactly what I wrote that toji did. also I have no experience at all has a swimmer, surfer, or lifeguard... so please don't mind anything that's strange!! again my MacBooks autocorrect keeps changing toji to tori!! pls let me know abt anything else, criticism is helpful!

[strniohoeee]

Vigilance

Pairing: Matt Sturniolo X Female Reader

Synopsis: Matt is super jealous over Y/N getting male attention. He doesn’t know how to communicate this, causing Y/N to feel hurt🏵️ this is for the request asking for a jealous Matt when Y/N gets hit on

Warnings⚠️: None☺️ just super cute

Song for the chapter: Dead to Me-Kali Uchis

The triplets had orchestrated a vacation for our friends! They had invited Madi, Tril and Nate. The 7 of us were going down to Florida for 7 days! We had all been working on ourselves and our content that we hadn’t really had a chance to hang out and catch up.

Because we all live in different areas we had all decided to meet at the Air bnb that was on the beach. Although I am currently living In LA, I'm originally from NY and have been back home for the past 4 months, so I had to fly out alone.

And of course just my luck my flight was the only one of the 7 of ours that got delayed. So everyone was already at the house for a good two hours before I showed up.

I walked to the front door checking to see if it was locked, and I am not surprised that these fools left the door open. So I let myself in placing my luggage next to the door, and locking the door behind me

“HELLOOOOO” I yelled out, and to no surprise I heard nothing

As I walked to the kitchen I could hear talking, and laughing, so I knew they were outside on the balcony

“Who would’ve thought we’d all be together again” I said as I walked out the door

“Y/NNNNNN OH MY GODDDD SHES HERE” Madi said, jumping up and running to give me a hug.

“Madiiiii I’ve missed you so much” I said hugging her tightly

I walked over to everybody as they were all sitting around the little glass table that was in the center

“Hey Nick….I literally missed you so much” I said, giving him a big hug. Then I went over to Chris and hugged him “my favorite interesting character” I said squeezing him tight

“Yoo so good to see you again” Matt said in the most flirtatious way, giving me a big hug

“So great to see you” I told him after letting go

“Trilllll” I said as I gave him a hug too

“Yoo what’s Nate it’s been so long” I said as I gave him a hug

“It’s been like what a year??” He asked looking at me

“Dude I think it has been that long” I told him as I sat down next to him

“How was your flight?" I know it got delayed” Chris asked me

“It was alright. There was this dude next to me…oh my god wouldn’t stop talking to me” I said rolling my eyes

“Oh my god!!! A guy talking to you how dreadful” Madi said groaning

“Oh shut up” I said rolling my eyes at her

“What yall been up to while I’ve been gone?” I asked them

“The last 4 months have been insane. We’ve been growing by the second, and we just got back from tour” Nick said

“I saw! Congrats to Chris even though I’m a Matt girl” I said looking over at Matt

“The whole time we just kept talking about how much we missed you, and how you would have love coming on tour with us” Matt said

“I would killllll to have been on tour with yall” I said

“Why do you look so different” Nate asked me

I laughed at this and gave a confused look

“Different?” I asked

“Yeah….somethings different” he said eyeing me up and down

“Mmm, I dyed my hair black, and it’s longer now. I’ve might’ve put on some weight too, but uhhh not too much on that or I’ll spiral” I said laughing, they laughed with me

“Maybe it’s that” he said

“What the black hair? Or me gaining weight??? And answer carefully” I said raising an eyebrow

“I think it’s the weight! It looks good on you. Your bodies filling out” he said smuggly

“CREEPER MUCH” I said smacking him playfully

“Nooo not in that way. You just look so much happier and healthier now” he said rolling his eyes

“Yeah she looks healthier now cause her ass is fat” Madi said

“ALRIGHTTTT no more body talk” I said laughing

“It’s still pretty early, and we’re on the beach, so I say beach time???” Chris asked

We all agreed, and I was the first to get up and turn around. As I turned around Nate and Trils eyes followed down to my ass. Something Matt took note of, and he wasn’t happy about that.

Madi and I were sharing a room, and decided to match bathing suits. We both wore vibrant hot pink bikinis that were kind of a thong in the back. They weren’t cheeky but they also weren’t g string. Somewhere in the middle.

This was a matching suit we bought 5 months ago, and my body has changed in the last 5 months. So the top part was a little extra snug

“Madi you look so hot in pink” I told her

“You looks so hot in pink” she said

“I have to find my sun block, but could you go downstairs and find my purse” she asked me

“Of course baby” I said and went downstairs

All the guys were sitting on the couch waiting on Madi and I

“Have yall seen Madi’s purse” I called out from the kitchen

“Yeah it’s over here” Nick called out

“Perfect I’m coming” I said after slipping on my flip flops and walking over

“WOAHHHHH” Nick said causing everyone to look up from their phone

I just rolled my eyes at him, and went to grab Madi’s purse which was next to Matt.

“I like the pink” he said looking at me

“Thank you matt” I said smiling at him

“Oh I need a cover up. I left mine back home, and Madi’s are too small for me” I said

“Want one of my shirts?” Tril asked

“Sure” I said. He got up and came back a few minutes later with a shirt for me

“Thank you” I said slipping it on

Madi finally found her sunblock and came down stairs

“Aii bitches let’s go” she said

We walked out the front door and around the house to get to the entrance of the beach

Once we found a good spot we set up or towels, and I took off my shirt

“Hey could you pass me the sunblock” I asked Madi

“Yeah here” she said handing it to me

It was the spray on kind, so I sprayed myself except my back I couldn’t reach

“Back please” I told Madi handing her the bottle and turning around

Matt watched Tril and Nate, and immediately their eyes fell down to look at my ass. Nick also noticed this

“Y’all have no shame” he said to them shaking their head

They both laughed and put there hands up in defense

We all sat around tanning for a little bit, but I was starting to overheat

“Hey I’m going into the water it’s too hot” I said getting up and walking to the water

I got in the water about just below breast level. When I felt a ball hit me, so I turned around

“Oh I’m so sorry” the guy came walking over.

“Oh no worries it didn’t hit me hard” I said looking up at him blocking the sunlight out of my eyes

“What's your name?” He asked

“I’m Y/N, and yours” I asked him

“I’m Logan” he said sticking his hand out, which I happily grabbed and shook

“Nice to meet you Logan” I said

“Likewise” he said and winked

“Are you from here?” He asked me

“Oh no my friends and I are just on a vacation” I said to him

“Nice! I’m actually from here, but I live in Georgia right now for work” he said

“Oh, that's really cool. How’s Georgia?” I asked him

“I mean it’s nice, but it’s not Florida” he said shining his bright smile

“I mean that’s true. I’m from New York, so I get that” I said laughing a little bit

“You know tonight we’re having a bonfire my friends and I, maybe your friends and yourself would like to join?” He asked

“Uhh yeah maybe, I could ask them” I told him

“Alright well uh cool, I’ll see you around Y/N” he said started to walk back

“Yeah I’ll see you around Logan” I said, and decided to get out the water, and head back to everyone

“Who was that?” Madi asked me

“His names Logan, he was nice” I said to her drying myself off with my spare towel

“Yeah, and he was hot” she said

“Ehh he was okay” I said shrugging my shoulders

“Uhh no he was hot” Nick said chiming in

“So everybody was just watching me” I said laughing

“Well duh! A guy approaches you. We have to watch” Chris said

“Good to know, but anyways he invited us to a bonfire tonight on the beach. I told him I’d let you guys know” I told them

“Oh we have to go” Nate said

Everyone agreed except Matt

“How about you Matt?” I asked him

He just looked up from his phone and shrugged his shoulders

Hmm weird but what’s ever…”uhh okay” I said

We had gotten back from the beach a few hours ago, and decided to get some pizza from a nearby spot.

Eventually we all decided to head to the beach for the bonfire. I immediately saw Logan, so we walked over

“Hey Logan” I said

“Heyyy” he said going in for a hug, which shocked me, but I hugged him back

We all introduced everyone to each other and kind of just broke apart to talk to everyone

We were all sitting around the bonfire just talking

Logan was talking my ear off, and throwing compliments at me here and there. But I didn’t really care for him.

I kept glancing over at Matt who was occasionally talking to some girl.

I started to get a bit jealous. I really liked Matt, but I felt like he didn’t like me back. The girl had gotten up to get a drink, when Matt and I’s eyes locked. I smiled at him, and just kind of rolled his eyes and looked away.

That was weird?? And uncalled for

So I turned back to Logan and chatted with him. At one point he started to get a little too flirty. He went as far as tucking my hair behind my ear. And when I kind of moved my head away I looked at Matt, and he was watching me. But when he saw that he got up and started to walk away

“Uhh I’ll be back” I said to Logan and shot up walking after Matt

“Hey Matt what’s up?” I said walking with him

“Nothing” he said back bluntly

“Doesn’t seem like nothing” I told him

“Well it’s nothing” he said once again bluntly

“Did I do something wrong?” I asked him

“Nope” he said popping the P and looking at the water

“I’m not sure what I did to you, but whatever it is I’m sorry” I said and stormed off heading back to the house.

Got to the house, and went up to my bed. I started to cry. How could someone I adore so much just treat me like that. I didn’t do a single thing to him, and now he’s giving me the cold shoulder and being mean.

I ended up falling asleep before anyone came back, so I knew I’d face some questions when I woke up. Surprisingly, I woke up after everyone. I decided to shower and do my whole routine before heading downstairs

“Morning Y/N” Nick said smiling at me

“Morning guys” I said

“What happened to you last night?” Chris asked me

“Oh i got really tired, so I decided to head in” I told him as I sat down to eat a bagel

I sat next to Matt, and he didn’t even look over at me.

“Morning Matt” I said looking at him, he was drinking his orange juice, and all he did was raise his eyebrows at me.

We were on day 5 of our trip, and Matt was completely ignoring me now. He would go out of his way to not be near me, or interact with me at all. I spent those nights crying over how hurt I felt. I was hurting him, and he wouldn’t even talk to me about it.

Tonight everyone called it a night at about 12, but I was so riddled with anxiety that I stood up. I decided to sit outside on the patio

Once again letting tears fall from my eyes. Not understanding why he was being so mean to me. It was unfair.

I heard the screen door open and someone step out

“Y/N?” I heard someone say. I looked over my shoulder and scoffed

“What do you want Matt?” I said wiping my eyes and sniffling

“Are you crying?” He asked me sitting diagonal from me

“What does it matter” I spat at him

“Why are you crying?” He asked me with worry written all over his face

“Doesn’t matter not like you’d care anyways” I said to him

“I do care” he responded

“You’re not going to do this. You’re not going to sit and ignore me for 5 days, and then want to come out here and be all sweet and play therapist. You can go right back inside and leave me alone” I said shooing him

“Woah” he said taken aback

“Woah nothing matt…woah nothing. You’ve been a dick to me this whole trip, and I was so excited to see you. But for the past 5 nights, guess what I’ve been doing?? CRYING OVER YOU” I said slightly raising my voice

“God this is all my fault” he said rubbing his eyes and sighing

“It sure is” I said rolling my eyes at him

“I’ve been such an idiot. I’ve been bottling up how I feel so so fucking long” he said

“What the fuck are you saying” I said getting annoyed

“Y/N I like you so fucking much. That it actually brings pain to my heart and chest when I see you talking to other guys. And when Tril and Nate were looking at you making comments it just made me so jealous. And when Logan came over to you. I wanted to throw up with anxiety. I hated the fact that you were looking and talking to them, and not me. That I got so angry with you, but truly I was angry at myself, and jealous over someone who isn’t mine” he finally said

It took a second for all that to register in my head

“I..Matt what?” I said confused

“I really really like you. Like a lot” he said looking into my eyes

“Matt, I have liked you for the longest time. I missed you so fucking much while I was back home that I wanted to call you every second of everyday, but I just couldn’t bring myself to” I told him

“You should’ve….I would have picked up. For you I will always pick up” he said

“Y/N will you be my girlfriend?” He asked me getting up and walking to sit next to me

“Yes Matt. Yes I will” I told him looking at him

“God I’m such a fool. I will never ever do anything stupid like that again” he said pulling me in for a hug

“Matt never do that. Know that I am here for you. Always and forever. And however you’re feeling. Just come and speak to me about it. We will work this out together” I said pulling away

“I promise I will” he said giving me his pinky

I laughed and made a pinky promise with him, and with his other hand he pulled me in for a kiss.

The next two days of the trip were amazing. Matt and us had been doing everything as a couple, and truly enjoying the end of our vacation before we all had to head home

“TO US” we all screamed as we cheersed our soda cans

This was a vacation that would remain a core memory for me.

The End

Hope and pray that to the person who requested this likes it🫶🏽🫶🏽 Hope you guys enjoyed😘😘 time to keep pumping these stories out !!

-J💅🏽

[johnnieguilbertsgirlfriend]

hii can you do hamzah meeting u for the first time after long distance and u guys do some stuff ifyk

YES sorry been so long since the last post but here's a new one and sorry i had to include the car pic! sorry for my computer readers bc the song tag is huge lmao and if u dont want fluff/story then skip to the smut!

NIGHTS LIKE THIS - hamzahthefantastic x reader

CONTAINS: fluff, smut, virgin reader, slightly experienced hamzah (even though ik he's never laid pipe) p in v, praising, fingering, creampie, more idk

WC: 1.5k

story below the cut

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you had met hamzah online a while ago when he slid up on your instagram story, and the two of you were best friends ever since. he told you about everything; his youtube channel, vacations, plans for the day, and you shared your life too. you loved having someone to listen to all the little parts of your day, even if it was boring. he would facetime you while doing the most random things too, and it was fun. but you both decided you wanted more than that.

after months of repeatedly calling and texting, you decided your long conversations would be better with eachother present. and now, the day finally arrived for you to meet hamzah in person. you agreed to meet at the airport, since it was easier, and cheaper, for him to take you in his car. walking through the terminal with a suitcase in hand, you headed towards the parking lot. a mixture of excitement and anticipation bubbled within you. your heart was racing as you headed towards where he told you he was parked. approaching the car, you saw someone waiting outside of it.

it was him, with his familiar smile and curly brown hair. “hey y/n!”, he calls out, walking towards you to presumably take your luggage. you stop to look up at him, smiling. “hi hamzah!”, you say, hugging the boy you had been waiting so long to see.

“wow this feels so surreal”

“yeah, i can’t believe you’re here right now”

taking in his cologne, you step back leaving room for the two of you to walk side by side to his car. he opens the passenger side door for you, then opening his trunk to stuff your stuff inside. as he climbs in the car and shuts the door, you do the same.

“i was thinking since you’ve already been traveling that we can just head to my place and order doordash?”

“yeah for sure, that sounds good”

as he started to drive, you guys caught up. the ride wasn’t awkward because you guys had already spent so much time talking to each other that it was normal now. however, you couldn’t stop thinking about your relationship with him. you never wanted to fully admit this, but the more time you chatted with hamzah the more your feelings grew stronger for him. and every single time you would just push that aside, because you didn’t want anything to be different between the two of you.

but still, the way he brushed his hands through his hair, ruffling and messing around with it occasionally. and the way his eyes were focused on the road, occasionally biting his lips.

“are you okay?”

he said, effectively snapping you out of it.

“yeah, i’m fine”

hamzah places a hand on your thigh, keeping the other on the wheel. you stop thinking and automatically place your hand on top of his. the car stayed silent until around 10 minutes later, where he pulls into the street where his apartment is.

“alright we’re here.”

he pulls his hand away from your leg to shut off the car. you look at him awkwardly, feeling some tension in the car.

“sorry about that i didn’t mean for it to be weird. just forget i did that.”

you laugh to fill the silence. he stares at you, taking a glance at your lips and proceeding to hold your jaw, pulling you into a kiss. it was soft, but romantic, like he'd been wanting to do that for ages. you were unsure of yourself, until he reassured you, moving his hand to the nape of your neck. he stops to speak,

"you don't know how long i've been waiting to kiss you, y/n."

"is this a good time to say that i like you more than a bestfriend?"

*SMUT*

he pulls your body as close as he can to his, over the console of the car. hamzah kisses you, more passionately this time. his tongue slides into your mouth, skimming over your teeth. you moan as he gets more assertive with his actions, moving your hair from your neck. he places small kisses on your jawline and your collarbone, before starting to lift up your shirt. your hands snap to reach his,

"wait, um, i've never done this before"

"wait you're a virgin? you never told me that"

you look to the side, embarrassed and hamzah can tell.

"don't worry baby. i'll teach you, c'mere"

he says, climbing into the backseat. you follow him, now knee to knee.

"can i?"

"mhm"

he asks for your permission to lift your shirt, revealing your light blue bra. you knew the universe told you to wear a cute one today. he takes his hoodie off as well, showing his defined body, probably from going to the gym. his hands reach around to your back, unclipping your bra. you try to cover yourself, feeling self conscious.

"you're so beautiful y/n"

he moves your hands, going to cup your breasts, kissing each one. your fingers play with his curls, moaning in pleasure while he sucks your boobs.

"so, so beautiful"

he starts to lay you down across the seats, climbing on top of you and trailing wet kisses down to your core. he looks at you for consent, before sliding down your shorts, leaving you in a thong. he takes off his jeans, leaving him in his boxers briefs. he kisses you once on your forehead,

"i'm gonna make you feel so good"

he touches your throbbing core through your already wet panties. he teases you for a bit before taking off his underwear and sliding yours to the side. he slowly inserts himself into you, making you moan,

"fuck, you're so tight"

"h- hamzah"

"tell me if it hurts okay?"

he actually cared about not wanting to hurt you, and you nodded to let him keep going. he starts off slow before picking up some pace. you bite your lip while he sucks on your neck, biting a little.

"you're doing great y/n"

is all he can manage to get out before groaning. his right hand grips your thigh, pulling you deeper into him.

"holy shit, right there"

you groan, overstimulated from everything that was happening. hamzah keeps thrusting right where you told him, hitting your g spot everytime. all that could be heard in the car were breathy moans from both of you and occasional curses,

"i'm close-"

"just hold on baby"

you try to hold in the knot feeling forming in your lower stomach. he takes his other hand, fingering your clit. you let the feeling unwind and cum on him, moaning and shuddering. after a few more thrusts he does too, throwing his head back and groaning. he takes his dick out and shoves a finger in your pussy to hold his cum in. after a minute, he starts to speak,

"i don't know if this is bad timing but you're the best thing that's happened to me. i like talking to you everyday and just love you. y/n, will you be my girlfriend?"

"i love you so much, and of course i will."

he holds you close, kissing your lips sweetly. putting his pants back on, he goes into his apartment to find a towel to clean you up.

────୨ৎ────

another hamzah fic for my hamzah lovers <3 leave some more requests and i will do them! thanks for supporting my page :)