#so grateful to all the disabled activists linked here!!!

[trans-axolotl]

Notes on the Radical Model of Disability

I'm seeing a lot of discussion today about different models of disability, and wanted to share my recent reading notes on the radical model of disability, which for me has been a super helpful model for understanding how disability works.

"The radical model defines disability as a social construction used as an oppressive tool to penalize and stigmatize those of us who deviate from the (arbitrary) norm. Disabled people are not problems; we are diverse and offer important understandings of the world that should be celebrated rather than marginalized."

Source: AJ Withers, Disability Politics and Theory. "Looking Back But Moving Forward: The Radical Model of Disability"

Key Points:

The radical disability model was developed by many disability justice activists (including Sins Invalid and the 10 principles of Disability Justice), and was inspired by many different models, including the social model. Withers points out that there are a lot of valuable parts of the social model, but also lots of limitations.

The radical disability model is not the same thing as the social model of disability. It rejects the strict social model separation between "impairment" and "disability." Traditionally, in the strictest versions of the social model, people use "impairment" to describe someone's individual limitations--generally considered the "biological" part of disability. People often use things like chronic pain and hallucinations as examples of "impairment." In the strict social model, disability is described as oppression added on top of the "impairments" people are living with. People usually describe things like inaccessible buildings and strict social norms as examples of the disabling impact of society. Withers points out how sometimes, the social models ideas about the separation of impairment and disability can leave many disabled people feeling excluded and like their experiences aren't represented. This article by Lydia X. Z. Brown talks a little bit more about those topics--using the terms "essentialism" to describe the impairment view and "constructivism" to describe the social view.

Instead, the radical disability model argues that you cannot easily separate impairment and disability, and points out that both "impairment" and disability are always socially contextual. Disability must be analyzed in context to the society we are currently in, both so that we can understand the experience of oppression and so that we can understand the impact it has on our bodies and minds. For example, someone living with chronic pain will still have chronic pain no matter what society they live in. But things like whether they can sit while they work, whether they have to work at all, if they can afford assistive technology, if there is easy access to pain medications, etc, all affect their body and lived experience of pain in a very real way. Ending capitalism would not suddenly take away all the pain they are experiencing, or make them not disabled. But it might change their ability to cope with pain, what treatments are available to them, and what their bodily experience of pain is like. Similarly, someone's experience with hallucinations can be dramatically shaped by the context they are in, whether they are incarcerated, if their community reacts with fear, whether they have stable housing, and more. The radical model of disability looks at how the different contexts we live in can affect our very real experiences of disability. Instead of the medical model, that only looks at disability as a biological, individual problem that can only be fixed through medicine, or the strict social model, which focuses on changing society as the only solution for disability, the radical disability model looks at how different societal contexts change both our biological and social experiences. It acknowledges that disability is a very real experience in our bodies and minds, but looks at how the social environments we live in shape all parts of "impairment" and disability.

Intersectionality is a key concept for the radical disability model. Withers points out how disability studies often ignores intersectionality and only focuses on disability. "Disability politics often re-establish whiteness, maleness, straightness and richness as the centre when challenging the marginality of disability. Similarly, when disability studies writers discuss other oppressions, they often do so as distinct phenomena in which different marginalities are compared (Vernon, 1996b; Bell, 2010). When oppressions are discussed in an intersectional road it is commonly treated like a country road: two, and only two, separate paths meet at a well-signed, easy-to-understand location. Intersectionality is a multi-lane highway with numerous roads meeting, crossing and merging in chaotic and complicated ways. There are all different kinds of roads involved: paved and gravel roads, roads with shoulders and those without and roads with low speed limits, high speed limits and even no speed limits. There is no map. The most important feature of these intersections, though, is that they look very depending on your location." (Withers pg 100.)

The radical model of disability is inherently political. The radical model of disability looks at who gets labeled as disabled, how definitions of disability change, and how oppressors set up systems that punish disabled citizens. Oppressors set up systems of control, violence, and incarceration that target disabled people, and shift the definitions of disability based on social and economic changes. Withers shares examples of this, talking about the eugenics movement in the United States as an explicitly white supremacist movement that defined "disability" in a way that targeted racialized people, how homosexuality was added and then taken out of the DSM, and many other examples of the way certain people are labeled as "deviant" and impacted by ableism. Disability becomes weaponized by oppressors as a tool of marginalization, and affects many different marginalized groups. This interview of Talila A. Lewis is a really great article that explains more about a broader definition of ableism, and expands on a lot of the topics mentioned here.

Disabled is not a fixed, one-size-fits-all, never changing identity. However, it is an important personal and political identity for many people, because our experiences of disability are real and impact our bodies, minds, and social experiences in many ways. Withers argues that in disabled community, we need to have room to celebrate and have pride in our disabled identity, as well as being able to recognize the pain, distress, and challenges that being disabled can cause us.

Within the radical model of disability, we should work collectively to build access and actively fight to tear down the systematic barriers that prevent a lot of disabled people from participating in our communities. Withers argues that we need to think beyond just changing architecture (although that's important too!) and understand the way things like colonialism and capitalism are also access barriers. Going back to the first point about disability in context, Withers explains that we must also think of access in context--there is no one "universal" way to make some accessible, and we need to be able to adapt our understanding of access based on the political and relational context we are in.

TL;DR: The radical model of disability is similar to the social model of disability, but instead of viewing disability as being only caused by society, it looks at how our real experiences of disability are always shaped by whatever social context we live in. It acknowledges that our disabilities are embodied experiences that wouldn't just suddenly go away if we fixed all of society's ableism. The radical model of disability is a political model that analyzes how definitions of disability shift based on how oppressors use systems of power to marginalize different groups of people. It offers us a framework where we can feel real pride in our disabilities, but still acknowledge the challenges they cause. It points out the importance of organizing politically to dismantle all kinds of access barriers, including things not traditionally thought of as access issues, like colonialism, capitalism, and other forms of oppression. Here's a link to another great summary by Nim Ralph.

other reading recommendations for understanding the radical disability model: “Radical Disability Politics Roundtable.” by Lydia X. Z. Brown, Loree Erickson, Rachel da Silva Gorman, Talila A. Lewis, Lateef McLeod, and Mia Mingus, edited by AJ Withers and Liat Ben-Moshe.

"Work in the Intersections: A Black Feminist Disability Framework.” by Moya Bailey and Izetta Autumn Mobley

"Introduction: Imagined Futures" from Feminist, Queer, Crip by Alison Kafer.

[ewh111]

Annual List of Favorite Film Experiences: The 2020 Pandemic Version

Happy new year! So happy to finally arrive at 2021! All the best for a much better new year!!

What a year it was. Since March 12, I've spent 98% of my time within the confines of my condo. The good thing is that as a natural introvert, I have not yet gone stir crazy. I get plenty of social interaction via Zoom. And as a type-2 diabetic, I have been especially careful, staying at home, going out only for essential work or errands, like groceries. I'm grateful that my extended family connected more through the pandemic via weekly 90 minute Zoom family check-ins.

After just two months of work from home, I surpassed the longest time I hadn't been on a plane in over 15 years. (In 2019, I took 42 flights--15 of them international; in 2020, just eight, all prior to the first week of Feb.) As someone who typically travels a lot for work, it's strange to be so stationary. But I'm not complaining. Without the daily commute, travel, and regular schedule of evening and weekend events, I've quietly appreciated the ability to get more sleep, find time to exercise, and even lose some weight. As I reflect upon the past year, I choose to look at the silver-lining and see this period as a positive, massive macro re-balancing of my life.

When things do get back to some semblance of normalcy, the ones who will have the most difficulty adjusting will be these two girls, Freddy and Maxie, who have been so spoiled with attention over the past 10 months.

Now onto this year's favorite film experiences.

What a strange year for film. The last time I experienced a communal movie-going experience was at the Sundance Film Festival back in January. Since 2020 will be remembered as the year of an uber-significant election and home confinement, it seems appropriate to begin this year's conversation with these two themes: democracy and geography, aka places we couldn't travel to.

LESSONS IN DEMOCRACY

Boys State

One of most riveting experiences is my favorite film from the 2020 Sundance Film Festival. This documentary follows four participants in the Texas edition of the week-long Boys State program. The filmmakers lucked out by selecting four boys whose journeys turned out to have fascinating dramatic arcs during the week. What unfolds is a totally engaging microcosm of the political dynamics in the rising generation of voters in America. Trailer: https://youtu.be/E1Kh_T5ZBIM

Hamilton

What a delightful escape from confinement and inability to see live theater by revisiting the stage musical phenomenon via the viewpoints of multi-cameras. It was a new way to appreciate the words, the music, the choreography, and staging of this remarkable work about Alexander Hamilton and his fellow founding fathers. Trailer: https://youtu.be/6s9sNvkjpI0

What the Constitution Means to Me

Missing live theater? Here's another gem to take in. Fast-paced, funny, deeply personal, and defiant, playwright Heidi Schreck plays herself in a mostly one-person show, revisiting her days as a teenager debating the meaning of the Constitution in dingy American Legion halls, linking her personal family history to our country's founding document. Trailer: https://youtu.be/P2zSRdVanDY

Crip Camp

Incredibly inspiring and engaging documentary about Camp Jened, a Catskills summer camp for teens with disabilities in the 1960s and 70s, which prepared many members to become leaders in the movement that eventually led to the passage of the ADA. An important piece of lesser known history and fight for social change and equity. Trailer: https://youtu.be/XRrIs22plz0

TRAVELING WITHOUT LEAVING THE COUCH

My Octopus Teacher (South Africa)

A truly meditative and surprisingly moving documentary. In a kelp forest off the coast of South Africa, a noted underwater photographer documents his, dare I say "friendship," with an octopus whom he visits every day over the course of a year. Trailer: https://youtu.be/b-lbIJHlmbE

76 Days (China)

New York-based filmmaker Hao Wu worked with two journalists in China who recorded harrowing, fly-on-the-wall footage inside four Wuhan hospitals at the epicenter of the COVID-19 outbreak, a clearly risky endeavor unsanctioned by the Chinese government. While this may seem unappealing to watch as we still struggle with the crisis, this apolitical, humanizing, compassionate, and ultimately uplifting film documents and honors the courageous doctors and nurses and their relationships with patients and family members grappling with the unfolding crisis over the course of the full 76 day lock-down in Wuhan. Trailer: https://youtu.be/x_f6-jhbsR4

Your Name Engraved Herein (Taiwan)

The highest ever grossing LGBTQ film in Taiwan, as well as its most popular domestic film in 2020, this is a sensitive, poignant, slow-burn story of coming out and first love in an all-boys Catholic school in a still socially-repressive Taiwan immediately after the lifting of martial law in 1987. Trailer: https://youtu.be/mzfVBg54BGw

A Sun (Taiwan, again)

Driven driving instructor father + marginalized night-club hairstylist mother + high achieving, golden child # 1 son + disowned black sheep younger son serving time in juvenile prison = unhappy family. This multiple winner of Taiwan's version of the Oscar, A Sun is an intricate, engaging, character-driven family drama full of disappointment, redemption-seeking, and tragic setbacks, but uplifting in the end. Trailer: https://youtu.be/LBogLcE2wNQ

Gunda (Norway)

An unusual viewing experience, I did not expect to be so drawn in and highly moved by this intimate, up-close and personal barnyard portrait. A totally mesmerizing and beautifully filmed, black and white, wordless and scoreless documentary (only ambient farm sounds with no humans in sight)--just a sow named Gunda and her piglets with interludes by a one-legged rooster and herd of cows. And yes, there's a subtle message. Trailer: https://youtu.be/05Gc2lANyTQ

The Painter and the Thief (Norway, again)

An intriguing and fascinating documentary about the strange and complicated story of a female Czech artist, whose two most important paintings are stolen from an Oslo art gallery in broad daylight, and the thief who turns out to be an addiction-addled male nurse who she unexpectedly befriends during the trial. Trailer: https://youtu.be/LKBiKDZSf_c

Mucho Mucho Amor (Puerto Rico)

The story of the iconic fortune-teller with millions of followers in the Spanish-speaking world: the bedazzled and caped, effervescently flamboyant, gender non-confirming, Puerto Rican television astrologer Walter Mercado. Disappearing from the airwaves without a trace in 2007 after decades of daily uplifting telecasts, no one knew what happened or where he had gone. Until these filmmakers tracked him down. Here, they tell his story in this loving portrait of the legend, in time to participate in an exhibition dedicated to his 50 year career at a Miami museum before his death last year. Trailer: https://youtu.be/XEJqiucxyrs

Welcome to Chechnya (Russia)

A gut-wrenching and chilling documentary about courageous activists who help LGBTQ individuals flee the repressive regime of Chechnya where violent, homophobic beatings and executions play out regularly and whose leader denies the existence of gay people in his republic. The doc plays like a menacing thriller with the filmmaker going to great lengths to protect the identities using elaborate digital facial disguises. Trailer: https://youtu.be/GlKkj_aHMXk

Tenet (Russia, the Amalfi Coast, Oslo, the future, and the past, among other places)

This is not an easy film to like. One of the most anticipated on my list of "must sees," but the pandemic delayed my viewing till its recent VOD release. Was it worth the wait? Well, it was almost incomprehensible for the first third. But it is here because I'm still thinking about it long after watching and is high on my list to rewatch. To enjoy on first viewing, you should stop trying to figure it out and just let it wash over you and enjoy the ride--it will eventually make (some) sense. Despite all its complexities, Christopher Nolan's ambitious concept boils down to a simple plot: rich Russian bad guy (Kenneth Branagh) wants to end the world and an unnamed secret agent-type guy known only as the Protagonist (John David Washington) tries to stop him. Oh, and there's reverse entropy. And inverted time. And yeah, there are spectacular scenes with time moving forward and backwards at the same time. Like its title, the film is one giant palindrome. Trailer: https://youtu.be/AZGcmvrTX9M

Apollo 11 (Space)

Watching this documentary is like witnessing Neil Armstrong, Michael Collins, and Buzz Aldrin's mission unfold before your eyes live, in real time. Put together from previously unreleased, stunningly crisp, and beautiful archival footage and communications audio from NASA, this is a breathtaking experience that captures the awe of the achievement without talking heads or commentary. Trailer: https://youtu.be/tpLrp0SW8yg

HOW TO DEAL WITH DEATH

Soul

This time out, Pixar tackles existential questions, like what it means to be alive and what is the "before life" in this metaphysically jazzy and terrifically "soulful" film featuring a predominantly Black cast. Trailer: https://youtu.be/xOsLIiBStEs

Dick Johnson is Dead

One would not expect a filmmaker's decision to document her father's descent into old age and dementia to be such an enjoyable and amusing ride. The result is a uniquely comic and bittersweet approach on how to handle his mortality, including envisioning and staging various ways he might accidentally hasten death. Her inspired choice to embrace the time left with her father in this way is endearing and touching without being sentimental. (And the director happens to be a college classmate: Kirsten Johnson, Brown '87.) Trailer: https://youtu.be/wfTmT6C5DnM

AND THREE MORE

Mank

David Fincher masterfully tells the tale of Herman Mankiewicz, the writer of Citizen Kane. Part social history, part examination of the underbelly of Hollywood's Golden Age, part homage to Orson Welles and Citizen Kane, the film is beautifully and evocatively shot in lush black and white with standout performances by Gary Oldman as Mank, Amanda Seyfried as Marion Davies, and a screenplay by Fincher's late father, Jack. Trailer: https://youtu.be/aSfX-nrg-lI

David Byrne's American Utopia

An exhilarating and spirited concert film by Spike Lee who beautifully captures the exuberant grey-suited, bare-footed David Byrne and his similarly wardrobed bandmates on a minimalist stage--a perfect remedy for home-confined and connection-starved human beings during these unusual times. The Byrne-Lee pairing perfectly "makes sense" as you take in the penultimate number, a cover of Janelle Monáe’s "Hell You Talmbout." Trailer: https://youtu.be/lg4hcgtjDPc

Sound of Metal

A character study of self-discovery and emotional truths, Riz Ahmed gives a riveting performance as a heavy metal rock drummer who suddenly loses his hearing. The immersive experience is enhanced with the film's amazing sound design. Trailer: https://youtu.be/VFOrGkAvjAE

HONORABLE MENTIONS

Borat Subsequent Moviefilm (perhaps the film most representative of the craziness of 2020), Ma Rainey's Black Bottom (great performances by Viola Davis and Chadwick Boseman), The Personal History of David Copperfield, Da 5 Bloods, The Way I See It, The Invisible Man, Trial of the Chicago 7, I Lost My Body, The Life Ahead, Wolfwalkers, The Bee Gees: How Do You Mend A Broken Heart. 

In the Queue

Minari, Nomadland, Bacurau, Small Axe, Beanpole, The Forty Year Old Version. 

2020: THE YEAR OF NON-STOP STREAMING

Honestly, given the lack of traditional theatrical releases, I did spend an inordinate amount of time streaming shows than I normally would. It has made me wonder about the challenges of narrative storytelling in the 90-120 minute format vs. the longer episodic format which is so much more conducive to storytelling and character development.

MY TOP 30-SOME FAVORITE PANDEMIC STREAMING EXPERIENCES 

In descending order of bingey-ness--is that a word?--i.e., inability to stop watching episode after episode. (And occasional commentary...)

Dark (Netflix)--I gave this German series a special shout-out last year (Twin Peaks + Stranger Things + The Wire + time travel), and season 3 finally arrived this summer. So good, I devoured it twice in one week. Complex, mind-bending, and addictively dense storytelling with time travel that makes sense (Tenet, take note) and super satisfying series finish. Ultimately unraveling the intertwined family tree of all the time-traveling characters will make your head spin for days. 

Money Heist (Netflix)--I needed something to replace my addictive need after Dark, and four seasons of this Spanish heist/thriller fit the bill perfectly. Plus, I think the series is rich in lessons on organizational behavior and leadership development/dynamics. Dissertation, anyone?

The Umbrella Academy (Netflix)--Not a genre I typically find appealing (superheroes), but I loved the combination of family dysfunction, sibling rivalry, humor, and more time travel. After finishing the two seasons, I really missed the characters and can't wait for next season. And as a JFK assassination buff, I loved that season 2 took place in Dallas,1963.

The Queen's Gambit (Netflix)--Girl survives car crash in which mom dies, grows up to be charming woman who is addicted to alcohol and does chess.

The Flight Attendant (HBO Max)--Girl survives car crash in which dad dies, grows up to be charming woman who is addicted to alcohol and serves first class. But not anything like The Queen's Gambit.

The Great* (Hulu)--Wickedly dark comedic period piece (Catherine the Great's 18th century Russia) with colorblind casting where scheming powerful people plot to get out of loveless marriage.

Bridgerton (Netflix)--A light romantic period piece (Regent era England) with colorblind casting where scheming powerful people and debutantes try to get into marriage and maybe find love.

Tiger King (Netflix)

The Crown (Netflix)

Sex Education (Netflix)

The Last Dance (Netflix)

Better Call Saul (Netflix)

Never Have I Ever (Netflix)--Best narrator ever!

Ozark (Netflix)

Watchmen (HBO Max)

Ugly Delicious 2 (Netflix)--David Chang is back with interesting take on food and culture. The classism of steak-eating?

Flavorful Origins (Netflix)

The Great British Baking Show Season 11 (Netflix)

Pen15 (Hulu)

Mrs. America (Hulu)

The Good Place (Netflix)

Ted Lasso (Apple TV)

Alex Rider (Prime)

Love, Victor (Hulu)

Giri/Haji (Netflix)

Ratched (Netflix)

The Undoing (HBO Max)

Lovecraft Country (HBO Max)

Zerozerozero (Prime)

Industry (HBO Max)

The Boys (Prime)

What We Do In the Shadows (Hulu)

We Are Who We Are (HBO Max)

Pose (Netflix)

Normal People (Hulu)

Indian Matchmaking (Netflix)

Middleditch & Schwartz (Netflix)

Schitts Creek (Netflix)--Don't be put off by this comic treasure being so low on the binge scale. The series gets better with each season, and I'm slowly watching it because I know the end is coming, and I don't want it to end.

[nonbinary-nature-lover-jeri]

Coming Out To All My Facebook Friends 

A week ago I decided to come out to all my friends on Facebook even prodding to see if I got a reply from people I wasn't sure of. This is the letter followed by observations about the response:

Dear Friends,

As most of you know in late Summer of 2014 I began a gender journey. All my life I had felt insecure about my gender. There were a number of opportunities earlier in my life to look at my own gender identity. In the second half of my Junior year in high school at Pine Tree Academy I boarded with a local dentist and his wife. They had a daughter a few years older than me in college where she stayed in a dorm. As the dentist and his wife worked I often had a couple hours every now and then when I was alone. I discovered the daughters wardrobe or at least the part she left at home. I tried the clothes on and remember feeling that this was more than simple curiosity. Meanwhile at school there were a couple bullies who had made comments and shoved me when they knew no one could see them. At the end of the year I passed around my yearbook for signatures. Two of the entries were quite hateful. One used "gay" as an insult and the other called me a "faggot." So come Senior year I made it a point to butch it up a bit, (appear more masculine), to avoid the bullying.

After graduation I left for college at Atlantic Union College in Massachusetts. In my first year there I met up with 3 or 4 gay guys. One of them was gender non-conforming, I became friends with him and had chats with him in the dorm stairwells where we found a measure of privacy. One memorable night he even took me and a couple others to a gay club. This was the fall of 1975 and my young mind was just overwhelmed by the experience. We continued to share secrets and concerns with each other. I came out as being attracted to guys and he shared both some of his exciting weekend encounters and his sadness at not being able to reconcile his sexual orientation with the church's beliefs. Soon Winter break came and we went in different directions. As the break ended I was informed of something pretty horrific. My flamboyant gay friend had committed suicide. I was scared, sad, confused and determined to keep my secrets hidden which I did until 1987.

I came out as gay in February of 1987, thirty years ago. I quickly got involved with the community. I began working with people with HIV/AIDS (PWA), devising outreach programs and assisting PWAs secure services and support. During that time I heard a sermon at the Unitarian Universalist Church by a guest preacher who ran the denomination's LGBT Program. He quoted Harry Hay, an early gay rights pioneer and founder of The Radical Faerie movement. What he said really struck a cord because his belief was that gay and lesbian people were different then straight people not just in the choice of sexual partners but also in our gender expression. The belief was that people like me were shamans, magicians and priests who stood between men and women and helped heal stresses and misunderstandings between men and women. I thought that I had found the answer.

During this time I got to know several transgender individuals beginning in the late '80s. They were for the most part trans women and while I didn't feel completely like a man, I didn't feel completely like a woman either. So, while I felt an affinity with my trans friends back then, their gender identity didn't match up with how I was feeling. By this time I had entered a relationship which became quite well known given our willingness to open up to the press. In an effort to be attractive to my partner who like hairy guys known as "bears" in gay subculture, I grew a beard stopped trimming hair off my body and became a bear, at least on the outside. I really grew to hate how I was frequently read - many presumed I was hyper masculine and probably into leather and S&M. I was really repulsed by that idea. I kept this a secret and our relationship weathered lots of challenges that came our way unitil August of 1996. On that date, for several different reasons, my partner and I changed our relationship from partner to close friend.

In 1996 I came to New Mexico and continued to work in HIV/AIDS work, focusing on prevention. As a way of deflecting presumptions about my masculinity I grew my hair out and declared myself a fairy bear which sometimes morphed into a "care bear." I got to know some wonderful Trans people here and learned a lot from them, particularly a couple Dine'/Navajo trans women who shared the ancient wisdom passed down by their elders about genders beyond male and female.

By 2009 my disabilities, symptoms and medication side effects made it difficult to work. Eventually I was declared disabled and left work. I began searching the internet for information that would answer the lifelong confusion I had about my gender. I began to see talk of genderqueer individuals. At first it didn't click with me because all I observed were individuals who were assigned female at birth. Finally a news story changed everything. I happened on a news story about a hate crime that occurred in California. I've shared the story many times so I will just lay out the facts. A high school student who identified as agender, (who had been assigned male at birth), was riding home on a bus and had nodded off to sleep. A boy sitting nearby who thought it would be a practical joke to set the person's skirt on fire. The agender student sustained serious burns on his legs and their story, (many agender individuals prefer people use a singular version of they as their pronoun), made local and national news. In response the community rallied round them. The high school the agender individual attended had an event where most students and teachers in the school wore skirts for a day to show their support. Other schools and groups honored diversity and showed their support in other ways. This story, particularly the explication of what an agender and genderqueer person was, really meant something special to me.

I continued to explore, I came out as trans/agender on my blog. I will not rewrite what I already have in my blog. If you haven't read it leave a comment and I'll give you a link. After this gender journey I'd been taking on my own I felt the need to connect with others. I discovered a trans support group here in Santa Fe and went to my first meeting. I wasn't sure I'd be accepted but that fear soon left as I was warmly welcomed. Soon I became involved in the group and helped out with a website and a Twiiter account. I also help facilitate meetings now and then. I have met so many wonderful trans men, trans women and nonbinary/genderqueer individuals. I have learned from their stories and continued to engage in self reflection.

I am very grateful to all the people I have met on my journey. Everyone of you has played a part in my life and your kindness and knowledge have been very important. I now identify as a trans femme, agender, nonbinary/genderqueer person, but if it's easier for you to remember you can call me transgender.

I am part of the trans community, a community that is now under siege. I consider the trans community as a very large extended family. When a black trans woman is murdered it breaks my heart, when someone is bullied and tormented so often they consider suicide I am deeply saddened. I also am dismayed that some on the right have reduced our community to mythological bathroom predators. I want my trans men and trans women friends to be free to use the facility that aligns with their gender identity and I, along with other nonbinary trans people want to have a gender neutral restroom available. Just like you all we want to do is take care of business, wash our hands and leave. We've been doing this for years without a problem. It's simply a fact that after losing the marriage equality battle the religious right aimed their sights on trans folk. A mythology was created and occasional incidents involving cis men were woven into the tale. I promise you we aren't putting ourselves in further danger by lingering in the bathroom one second longer than necessary. It's trans people that are the victims in some bathrooms. Bullies in schools are on the lookout for anyone who isn't their idea of normal. So it's trans students, gay and lesbian students and gender non-conforming cis students who get verbally and physically attacked. This needs to end now! I am proud to be a member of the trans community. This community has changed my life and made it meaningful again. If you don't understand, that's okay. Ask questions, read up on who we are and remain our friend. On the other hand, if you don't understand and refuse to learn and open your heart then, regrettably, I can no longer remain friends. I am too old to deal with negativity! I faced enough of it earlier in my life. As for my wonderful friends, family of choice, biological family and fellow activists who accept me and my community I thank you from the bottom of my heart ❤️!

Hugs, Jerry/Jeri

After this post began to receive likes and kind comments I was moved to respond. Here is that response with the names removed

I am feeling so blessed and overwhelmed with gratitude at the response to this post. Three of my friends, from way back, during my years in Norridgewock, Maine from 13 - 16 years old. Your simple "likes" were so moving for me. It shows you may not understand all I've shared but your willing to try. You'll never know how much that means to me and the literal tears of gratitude I've shared. Thank you so much! I was also moved by the "like" from my high school classmate at Pine Tree Academy. A time filled with both wonder and joy as well as internal turmoil I didn't show anyone.

And... my friends from my college era who left comments or "liked" this post. I'm so overwhelmed by their memories, their acceptance and/or their willingness to understand, even if it's with some trepidation. This means so much.

Then there are all friends who knew me during my gay/AIDS activist 🏳️‍🌈 era your acceptance means the world to me. Finally my new trans family 🦄 who've welcomed me with open arms, gave me encouragement and advice and support and love ❤️ your literal and virtual embrace have sustained me during the last two and a half years. Thanks so much. Finally my two unwitting fairy godmothers, your inspiration means more to me than either of you will ever know. I owe you so much and I will try and pass it on by being an inspiration and activist in our community. Before I end I should acknowledge my friend and dare I say apprentice, we embarked on our new journey together and I wish you all the best life has to offer. I may have missed someone, if I have I'm sorry but know your friendship is gratefully accepted. To all thanks����🏼, hugs🤗, love❤️and unicorns🦄!!

[giarts]

Navigating Toward Justice

Submitted by Tiffany Wilhelm on May 27, 2020

Reflecting on: What advocacy is being done to address the needs of African, Latinx, Asian, Arab, and Native American (ALAANA) arts communities in need of greater support?

At the top of my to-do list, I keep a list of links to resources that help me navigate philanthropy. They help me wrestle with questions like: how do I/we keep moving in the direction of justice? How can I/we acknowledge that systems of white supremacy, patriarchy, and capitalism have been extracting resources and labor from land and people for centuries and that I/we’ve played a role in that? How can those of us in philanthropy (in its many forms) support the artists and organizers fighting to upend those systems with a myriad of strategies daily? Before the pandemic, during, and after. I’ve shared those links at the end of this post, and my work and words here are indebted to the individuals and collectives whose words are represented there, as well as many others.

• • •

I’m honored to work as a program officer at Opportunity Fund in Pittsburgh, PA. The foundation is the legacy of Gerri Kay, who was a white woman like me, whose values and passions guide our work every day. She fought for (her words) “civil rights for African American and LGBTQ people” and for “humanistic values,” a philosophical and ethical stance emphasizing the value and agency of human beings. Our Executive Director Jake Goodman has said, “Gerri believed that art has precious value, in the lives of individuals and to greater society. Art can break down barriers, build empathy, illuminate new perspectives, criticize existing systems, connect us, humanize us and make the world more beautiful.”

When this crisis hit, we moved quickly to send a message to our grantee community. About a week later, we made deeper commitments to many things called for in this time: increased payout, a COVID-19 Response Fund, loosening restrictions, minimizing reporting, sending approved payments in advance, and a commitment to listen. Jake’s voice and leadership is always full of heart, care, and empathy. I’m so grateful for that.

Then we set about the work to honor those commitments. Jake immediately began spending time in virtual and phone space with our grantees to hear what was happening, how folks were responding, and what was needed. We attended organizing meetings, joined Zoom town hall meetings, and talked to artists and arts organization folks.

Although we’ve been moving toward participatory panel processes in our regular funding cycles, we believed that this moment called for fast, trust-based funding decisions. The Opportunity Fund board reviewed notes from the many conversations, and determined that prioritizing support for grassroots entities and small arts organizations would align with our values and have a strong impact in communities, especially communities of color. These are also the entities least likely to have access to larger foundation emergency funds or government assistance.

As we do in our regular cycles, we looked at the racial representation of our funding in “real time” as we made draft and final decisions about unsolicited grants from our COVID-19 Response Fund with a spreadsheet that was constantly updating the demographic distribution of our funding. It is clear to us that COVID-19, as well as nearly every other system in this country, has disproportionate negative impacts on people of color, so our funding needed to reflect that greater need.

In the end, 43% of our COVID-19 Response Fund went to Black-led organizations, 35% to white-led organizations, and 23% went to organizations with Latino or multi-racial-team leadership. Over half the funds went to entities with budgets under $500,000 and 79% went to entities with budgets of $1.5 million or less. Much of the funding was unrestricted. We have also pre-approved some general operating grants for arts organizations in our next cycle, no application required. We sent our list of grantees to foundation colleagues, knowing that funding from one foundation can be the vote of confidence needed for another foundation to give, especially to small organizations.

• • •

Beyond the Opportunity Fund, it’s also my deep honor to be a facilitator and board member for artEquity. Early in the pandemic, philanthropist Wendy vanden Heuvel made a strategic and justice-centered decision. She asked artEquity—a community whose values align with how she wanted to distribute resources—to take full control and power over how to allocate $1 million toward COVID-19 relief. The team at artEquity, led by Carmen Morgan, sought advice from people throughout the community by asking questions including, “How can we disrupt old patterns of philanthropy? What can we do to rebuild a system of giving informed by our values and ethos of justice? When this moment is over, what can we take away from this new model of giving?” Soon after, the team developed a plan to launch the Artist + Activist Community Fund, a rapid response fund targeted specifically to alumni of artEquity national facilitator training and organizations and funds recommended by that alumni community.

The list of entities, funds, and artists supported to date is fierce. Scroll down that page and you will see the artEquity team's transparent report to the community about where the funding is going and the demographic representation of the distributed funds. The team is analyzing that data to identify who isn't receiving sufficient funding and asking how we can seek out those folks for the next rounds of funding.

artEquity has shared some lessons learned relevant to all of us well beyond 2020:

Give support to individuals, not just institutions;

Build relationships 365 days a year, not just when needs are acute;

Provide support to individuals [and organizations] without asking them to prove their worthiness;

Be mindful of your identity (race, gender, disability, immigration status, sexual orientation) and how that may impact which people and organizations you support;

Give to people with social justice values who will in turn exponentially spread those ideals through their work and art-making.

• • •

To the question, “What advocacy is being done to address the needs of African, Latinx, Asian, Arab, and Native American (ALAANA) arts communities in need of greater support?”

While some institutions have used their resources to enter public conversations, amplify voices, conduct policy research, develop communications campaigns and advocate for policy change, the small organizations I work with most intimately have responded to the crisis largely through practices that deliberately prioritize communities of color.

This everyday advocacy is being done by people of color—often Black women—doing mutual aid work, leading grassroots organizing, providing healing and mental health support, distributing resources, and advocating in predominately white institutions and funding entities. I’m grateful it’s being done at Opportunity Fund and artEquity. It’s being done by each human committed to justice speaking up for levels of support long stolen or withheld from Black, Indigenous, People of Color artists/individuals, and organizations. It’s being done anytime someone points out that predominantly white institutions still receive the vast majority of funding.

It’s not yet enough, but I hope it represents navigation in the direction of justice.

A Just Transition for Philanthropy

Philanthropy Has Changed How It Talks — But Not Its Grantmaking

Can Foundations Achieve Equity?

Pretty much everything that Vu Le writes

Justice Funders Assessment

5 Lessons to Guide the Transition to a More Just Philanthropy

Resonance: A Framework for A Philanthropic Transformation

Trust-Based Philanthropy Project

Barcelona Commitment from EDGE Funders

It Takes Roots Challenge to Philanthropy (during COVID and always)

COVID-19: Using a Racial Justice Lens Now to Transform Our Future

All of Justin Laing's work

Tiffany Wilhelm is program officer at the Opportunity Fund.

Posted by Tiffany Wilhelm on May 27, 2020 at 01:22PM. Read the full post.

[issues-in-design-psychicsuesie2]

LINK EXPERIMENT ON TUMBLR x 2   No picture again but it had more info from the website link above than last try. 

WHAT HAPPENED I applied for this free cell phone service option that not a single person I spoke with in Pennsylvania was able to show or suggest to me after 2 months of communication with people all over the city by foot-ish about moving there and looking for local resources to accommodate my automatic disability income limitations: The disabled population are not in control of this disappointing autonomacy. I found this resource totally on my own with my spirit guides; the Universe (prana). I clairaudiently heard “..just type in ‘free cell phones’ and see what comes up..” and Qlink popped up at 1 or 2 on the search list. It was about a week ago so that memory is already slow now. I am grateful the term I was able to search was so acute, which made it simple, but I wonder if the program is so NEW, that maybe no one knew it existed, and after 2 months of moving and transferring to another college and openly declaring to everyone that it just did not fit in my budget. I’m not embarassed, I’m disabled. But there is a lot of violating pressure to buy what you simply CAN’T on this income. This income cap/bracket (the people in it) have NO OTHER REAL VIABLE CHOICE but to ASK ‘OTHERS’ FOR HELP like this every month or so. People don’t make friends with them/us because they can think and have thought that we/SS recipients are jealous of their income or success or that we are lazy and irresponsible. This kind of stuff does not make social security recipients SAFE in todays technologically advanced and social environment. So, capitalism in the technology is putting us (disabled people) in real economic danger rather than freeing us to cope & get our educations while enduring limitations so harrowing they can cause bereavement level emotions in people who are conscious that they will never work in their fields again because of invisibles. Anyone: “Please get people to stop bullying us to purchase technology we cannot afford, in lieu of food, housing and water.” And maybe knowledge. Disabled people have the right to seek or wait for programs that will help them economically via political service achievements in the civil rights areas here in America, before spending money irresponsibly that they do not have, and because of the energy over the conservative right, confusing them. The US government provides a proof of income doc that we have to show everyone liberally in order to get the benefits of those programs and even this could be simpler, too, as SS via/and the US government can just link all of the services electronically with the helpful invisibles. But since so many people have to see it, what is the big mystery with how short-changed we are? And, on top of it, I also still haven’t found a food bank I can access by going in and easily picking up fresh fruit or vegetables and canned goods. This is sad. Food access should be immediate. (@Jonas, I might have been able to get a nice modest art table if I had been able to save money here. And, because I deserve the power to ‘give’ to myself maturely what will make me comfortable in this chronic condition under all of this displacement stress. Instead, I/we/pain victims are always coping with insufficiencies that cause hopeless deprication like this. And, just fyi: who is talking about the deprication artists can experience when going through biological life shutdowns, vs. maybe the average citizen? Artists have already reached specific, acute aesthetic consciousnesses and that needs to go into the social security and housing conversation somewhere so that they can give us ALL a boost in our daily lives no matter which condition or “slow” we are suffering.) 

CONCLUSION  This graphic artist made this technological discovery all on her own in an environment teaming with creative professionals querying the capitalist and technological dogma in todays world for fun almost daily as part of their automatic knowledge. Is the QLink program that new? How did they miss it? Or, is QLink not cool enough to be noticed visually? The website is sort of dry.. At any rate:  Where are the real information systems?  Where are the real information systems? Where are the real information systems? Where are the real information systems? Where are the real information systems? Where are the real information systems? Where are the real information systems? Where are the real information systems? Where are the real information systems? Where are the real information systems? Where are the real information systems? Where are the real information systems? Where are the real information systems? Where are the real information systems? Where are the real information systems? Where are the real information systems? Where are the real information systems? 

[concept arised.] DESIGN ISSUE Not every state has been added to Qlink and I can’t see why.  DESIGN ISSUE I sent 2 pics of ‘proof of income’ or ‘proof of sitchie’ (SS dis.inc.)(medicare card). They approved me for phone & service which I am getting by mail. Discernment: The mail portion is absolutely helpful to my pain condition.  This process illustrated that VA was NOT on the list of qualifying states with QLink, but since my school address was PA, I was able to discern that PA was on that list. BUT: I cannot see which other states are or aren’t, and I think that this HURTS THE PEOPLE by inadvertently harboring CONFUSION, if it is innocent, and by ‘harboring confusion’ if it is driven by conservatives. Vis a vis, state vs federal; Federal linking is my hint. People may abuse loopholes. So nip them.   I really feel the Social Security income proof is what did the trick; but, the decisions that are made and the reasons they are chosen are also invisible! I didn’t get any feedback on submissions. O.O With multiple addresses, I am sure I qualify for service. Lots of professionals have more than one address and it is parochial to assume that people in the social relief systems do not, as they can receive grant money to attempt their educations and relocate to do so temporarily, as they intuitively become aware that this is available. PLEASE NOTE: Intuition reveals invisibles. But I don’t feel it is ethical in a federally backed system to leave disabled people 'intuiting’ so many of them. These are benefits liberals voted to instill so they could enjoy them before becoming entirely physically impaired of doing it at all. So, why aren’t there more disabled or retired people going into college on them? The Universe: It’s the invisibles. And the conservative right.  CONCLUSION 2  Artists are politically active. Disabled people are politically active. We can be politically involved and we can be activists and that is how we are actively involved in changing people’s lives when beginning to experience too much chronic pain to make art anymore in certain types of medias. (Most of my work is now in fine art mediums leaning a little craft because of my disabilities; craft mediums allow mobility to stretch out stiffening muscles and mounting pain, computers do not, but I don’t think it will go well much longer.) I HATE PAIN. I HATE PAIN. I HATE PAIN. I miss art

~ Just under 4���, wood and acrylic work by ME. :) 

[ladyimaginarium]

Hey, guys, I'm nervous to even make this post, because I'm usually not the kind of person who does this kinda thing, let alone ask others for assistance, but I really need your help. It's Autism Acceptance Month, and most of you don't know this, but I'm under a conservatorship ( in case you don't know what that is, the link leads to ASAN and conservatorships and why they're inherently abusive to autistic and otherwise disabled and neurodivergent people and should be made illegal ) in a dysfunctional household that's trying to recover and I'm going into a mental hospital today of my own free will. It's possible I'll explain my situation a little in the future but it's not a guarantee but what I can guarantee is that I'll be updating y'all on my time in care.

For those of you who don't know me, hi, my name is Arcana ( and for those I'm extremely close to, Angel / Angie ), and I’m a queer, trans / nonbinary / genderfluid, Two Spirited, intersex, mspec, aspec, autistic, disabled, neurodivergent, HoH, chronically ill, psychotic spoonie witch, mixed Native / Indigenous and Ashkenazi Jewish "Canadian" bodied system, I'm an aspiring activist, ASMR roleplayer, fashion model, voice actrex, film actrex ( hopefully getting into something big on Netflix and/or HBO one day ), ASMRtist, youtuber/vtuber, polyglot and writer, and I need support, especially because I don't know how long I'll be in care.

You can donate to my P*yP*l account while you also consider taking a look at my Throne Wishlist, which is the next best thing you can do to support me, even if that's as simple as spreading the word around, it's a privacy first Wishlist that's constantly updating and has a bunch of things in several categories ranging from different prices — the lowest price being $2 — and it's a safe and anonymous way to buy gifts. Please also consider checking out my social media, leaving a kind message here on my wall and my podcast which is where I'll likely be sharing my experiences on, and possibly even on my YouTube and Tiktok, too.

It's starting to feel really hopeless right now, and I'm not sure if I'll ever move out and get away from my controlling mother who I'm not sure if she'll ever change, and my future looks really bleak right now, but at least I'm going to a mental hospital for an evaluation and hopefully get the help I need, although we are psych critical and pro recovery, so please consider helping me out.

Don’t feel pressured if you can’t afford any of the more pricier merch, but if you are able to buy at least some of this stuff for me, it would be greatly appreciated. If you can't, please consider reblogging and help a queer disabled autistic person of color afford the tools they need to make it through the day and/or make their stay at the hospital a little easier. Gifts are not necessary, either, but certainly appreciated, especially because I know that my time in care won't be easy, but after receiving your gift, I'd be more than happy to send you a personal thank you photoset or clip or post something on tumblr or elsewhere, regardless, I'd really appreciate it!

Keep in mind that you are absolutely not required to donate anything ever, however, if the tarot readings I will end up giving or my content or even myself touches you and you want to leave a tip or a donation or buy a gift, I’m keeping that option open, I am grateful for anything, but please never feel like you have to, especially if you’re worrying about how to buy food next month or if you’re hanging onto your sanity, this is only for those who’re physically and mentally able to give, those who have energy and spoons to care and to people who have money. You’re not horrible, cheap, awful, rude, unworthy or unlikeable for putting your survival first, so please don’t trip, and I say it all the time, and genuinely mean it, if you feel like people in your online/offline communities have more urgent needs and therefore should be prioritized in terms of support, absolutely please feel free to help them instead/first ( if you have the funds to help multiple people, anyway! )

I didn’t have a good childhood and not to mention I'm neurodivergent, and as a result, this led to me being a bit slow out of the gate ( mostly because my mother refused and neglected to teach me necessary lifeskills like she did with my older neurotypical sisters and honestly sought to suppress me and my autism rather than teach me anything of value ) when it comes to learning life skills and being able to make money and I am currently seeking many resources online for making extra money, while learning “basic” life skills as an adult.

Passover and Easter are here, so if you want to use this occasion to help out my disabled mentally ill spoonie plural queer Native and Jewish ass, please do. Please boost if you can, I need all the help I can get. Please don't tag as d//nations, I dont want tumblr to suppress this post, thank you so much for reading, and I hope that whoever's reading this are having a happy holiday!

Update: It turns out that I won't be hospitalized which is complete and utter bullshit, but instead I will be assigned a team, not that it helps much, because it's certainly not what I asked for and it's not the same thing as being hospitalized, but whatever, but if you still want to support me, the opportunity is still there and would be greatly appreciated!