#so for any saturn lovers such as myself - this for u....... | Explore Tumblr posts and blogs

plutonian-moon · 2 years ago

Text

random astrology observations p1 ! 🎧 ☆°

take what resonates leave what doesn't !!

8H moons can have toxic relationship with mother figure, here mother can be very intense, possesive and controlling (scorpio moons and moon-pluto (hard aspects) can relate too) ☆°

nemesis (128) is a asteroid that can tell u about ur enemies for example nemesis in 1st house can be their own enemie (i have this and its hard lol) ☆°

8H venus/scorpio venus/venus-pluto (hard aspects) are very obssesive lovers but they can also attract so many obssesive lovers and also people that can be jealousy of them ☆°

if u dont relate to a specific placement/s in ur natal chart then u can look at ur persona charts for example u dont rlly relate to ur moon sign even to the aspects, house, degrees etc then u have to look at ur moon sign in ur moon persona chart bc its like ur second moon sign ! and u can see if u relate (also looking at ur sun sign here can be important and yes ur sun sign and deegres will be not changing and if u have a pisces moon 20° for example in ur natal chart then in ur moon persona chart u will have pisces sun 20° BUT here house position and aspects changes so u can look at this ! ☆°

if u dont have any 1H placements in natal chart and ur beauty dont fit the rising sign (remember to look at ur deegres, aspects, decans and chart ruler!) then u can look at ur asc persona chart asc + sun position and if u have any 1H placements there bc they can tell abt ur type of beauty i give myself as a example bc in my asc persona chart i do have virgo rising 20° with 1H moon, 1H venus and 1H saturn (in whole sign tho bc in placidus its in 12th house but i use both whole sign and placidus so yeah lol) and people assume that i am a virgo or i have a virgo placements but i dont have in my natal chart any virgo placement/s lmao so i was thinking always from what this can comes from + also people tend to think that i am a cancer rising or even libra/taurus rising or capricorn and yeah here i can see why ☆°

alsooo pls look at ur chart ruler persona chart bc its can tell u so much abt ur personality traits etc ! i sometimes think of this as ur second birth chart looll i have in my chart ruler 12H stellium with 1H neptune and 1H chiron with mercury conjunction pluto + asc conjunction pluto hehe so powerful i lov this sm ☆°

anyways i notice that 12H placements love sleeping its can be their literally hobby lmao .. pisces/neptune dominants/stelliums can relate too ! ☆°

sun conjunction mercury are so talktive and if they dont have afficted sun or mercury then they tend to have great communicative skills ! but they can like gossip alot ☆°

5H uranus are so fucking creative and have the most unique interests ☆°

mutable mercurys or risings can have fluid personalitys its literally can depends of the people that they meet they tend to not even notice that they can have change in personalitys to different peoples ☆°

4H pluto/scorpio IC can come from home that they dont feel safe in and they can experience even abuse in childhood awh :( i wanna huggg yall!!! i have in my IC/4H persona chart my pluto in 4th house so i understand yall btw we need a support group !! 😩😩 ☆°

lilith 1H/lilith-asc (conjunctions/squares/oppositions) or 1st house pluto/scorpio risings/pluto-asc (conjunctions, squares/oppositions) are very magnetic and powerful peoples but in worse cases these peoples can attracted many unwanted attention and be sexualized .. or they can getting alot of comments abt their body .. :/ ☆°

4H venus, 4H jupiter, IC libra, IC taurus and IC sag can have pretty house or they can have a good relationship with their parents BUT !!! if afficted or if this person have also malefic in 4H then its not gonna be like that ! (i have 4H venus so u can think that i have unproblematic childhood etc) but its not true i have 4H chiron, 4H neptune, 4H uranus, afficted moon in 8H, moon opposition pluto, sun opposition saturn, 8H saturn, 12H ruler in 4H pisces venus... that is squaring my poor 1H pluto and i have in IC/4H house persona chart 4H pluto with 4H saturn and my childhood was very bad so yeah always look at everything in ur birth chart bc theres so many things to look at and if u will look at only one placement and ur not gonna look at the aspects, degrees, decans, rulers of houses then its not gonna work :p ! ☆°

virgo placements are so comfy to be with !!! and yall reminders me of a plant mom and nature lovers !!! also virgo placements can be a big cats lovers (scorpio placements too!) ☆°

pisces venus/7H neptune/venus-neptune (hard aspects)/5H neptune, venus in pisces decan and sometimes even pisces deegres in venus (12° + 24°) are people who tend to attract many fake ass cheaters peoples to their love life also peoples with addictions or with mental health problems but they can also attract peoples who are artists or are interested in art ! also musicans ! but plz be careful and try to not ignore red flags :( bc u can giving so much in love even if its bad for ur mental health plz take care of urself ily/p ☆

2K notes · View notes

loseyoutoloveme · 4 years ago

Note

can you do a rundown/review of every song on folklore like you've done for selena? and what your current top 5 are??

considering this is officially one of my top 3 favourite albums ever i’m v happy to 😌! warning, absolutely every single song will be ranked 10/10

thank for wanting to know my thoughts :( i can’t believe anybody would volunteer to read this JDNSKSDJKDS

first of all, my top 5 is probbbbably gonna change (maybe not tho bc my lover top 5 hasn’t really changed a lot), but for now, i think it’s: august > seven > mad woman > illicit affairs > mirrorball

THE 1:

ngl my very first thought was that it reminded me of same love by macklemore skdjdskjdskjsd but not in a bad way!

literally some of the prettiest lyrics, i knew just from this song that this would top red as her best lyrically (best album in general)

honestly just rly sad and sweet and one of those songs that has such a universal sound i feel?

also the simplest song of the album lyrically (also not in a bad way, just like objectively this is the easiest subject matter on the album with the least opaque lyrics), so a really good opener

best lyrics: “we never painted by the numbers baby but we were making it count/you know the greatest loves of all time are over now” and “we were something don’t you think so/roaring twenties tossing pennies in the pool/and it my wishes came true it would’ve been you”

a cute girl, 10/10

CARDIGAN:

i was surprised by the darkish sound of this one

idk what that like clanking sound in the background is but i find it a lil distracting in the first half of the song - but if i ever find out what it is and it has some symbolic meaning/purpose for being there (i assume it does) i’ll accept it sdjknsd

i love the nostalgia that is so present in like almost every song on this album :(

also the music video is stunning and frames the entire album in the most interesting way, metaphor-wise

best lyrics: “i knew you’d linger like a tattoo kiss/knew you’d haunt all of my what-ifs/the smell of smoke would hang around this long/cause i knew everything when i was young/i knew i’d curse you for the longest time/chasin’ shadows in the grocery line/i knew you’d miss me when the thrill expired/and you’d be standing in my front porch light/and i knew you’d come back to me”

10/10

THE LAST GREAT AMERICAN DYNASTY:

love this one bc it’s like a nice lil exhale in an album filled with angst, like it’s cute and boppy without being aggressive

i’m suddenly absolutely obsessed with rebekah harkness, particularly the “bitch pack” thing and her dyeing someone’s dog green

i love taylor’s storytelling and i love how that’s always been a big part of her approach to songwriting. this is taylor at her best narration, like starlight but so much better. this is a type of songwriting that is so underused these days, esp by mainstream artists and i love so much that she has always used it and been so invested in it

the pronoun change made me screech. sooo goooood

taylor’s obv a deeply autobiographical artist which is why it’s so incredible to hear her tell OTHER people’s stories and somehow make them so her own. like i think it’s mostly the english major in me that just gets so emotional over that...... the way that other people’s stories became our own through the way we tell them......

this song is def the one that is most explicit about the album’s theme of telling stories but ones that tell something about her (and about her listeners too), by switching to personal pronouns at the end. it sets up a pattern for the rest of the album, where each song is about one thing (the actual story she’s telling) but also about a bunch of other things.

a good example of why she’s the greatest songwriter of this generation

best lyrics: “there goes the maddest woman this town has ever seen/she had a marvelous time ruining everything”

10/10

EXILE:

bon iver’s voice was a full shock to the system the first time i listened and idk why sdkjnds it is just so deep and i was not at all expecting it esp after the cuteness of tlgad

anyway these lyrics are GORGEOUS

i love a duet where the 2 singers’ lyrics are meant to be directed at each other. is there a word for that type of duet idk but it always makes a duet infinitely better

the miscommunication exemplified in the bridge...... chef’s kiss heartbreaking

out of all the songs this is the one that makes me feel the most like i am in the middle of a forest in winter. i can already picture myself listening to this song in december with the sound of a crackling fire in the background mmmmmmmm my exact vibe

best lyrics: “you’re not my homeland anymore/so who am i defending now?/you were my town, now i’m in exile seeing you out” and “i’m not your problem anymore/so who am i offending now?”

10/10

MY TEARS RICOCHET:

this chorus BRRROOOOKE ME

writing songs presumably about the masters situation and framing them as breakup songs was absolutely galaxy brain

i feel like the image of tears ricocheting has like a million layers to it and is just suuuuch a smart metaphor

also just such a visually rich song ? so is every song on the album but the metaphors of this song are all just so visual

best lyrics: “i didn’t have it in myself to go with grace/and you’re the hero flying around saving face/and if i’m dead to you why are you at the wake?” and “i can go anywhere i want/anywhere i want, just not home”

10/10

MIRRORBALL:

ok so i did like this one on first listen, i loved absolutely everything on first listen, but it didn’t hit my top 5 until like 8 listens later, so it’s def a big grower and i think could be a huge fan fav by next year

the self-awareness in her writing will never fail to amaze me

the way that life is just performing...... yeah

but it’s crazy to me that a person could be like “i’m a compulsive people pleaser and performer and i’ll do anything to get ppl to like me” and that leads to “i am a disco ball” like ???? her brain is so big. it’s such a gorgeous metaphor.... and the circus imagery AHHHHH

best lyrics: “i’m still on that tightrope/i’m still trying everything to get you laughing at me/i’m still a believer but i don’t know why/i’ve never been a natural, all i do is try try try/i’m still on that trapeze/i’m still trying everything to keep you looking at me” and “i can change everything about me to fit in”

10000/10

SEVEN:

this one simply rips my heart out

at first i was like oh this is so weird and then the chorus just would not leave my head

for me personally, nostalgia is literally 90% of my personality and just for so many personal reasons the thought of childhood ending and all of the growing pains that come along with that have been at the forefront of my psyche for the past year. so it just kills me whenever i find a song like this one and it kills me that taylor specifically has several songs about this topic and this is 100000% the best of them all. like it’s the most beautiful experience to have your thoughts and feelings and fears expressed so perfectly by a total stranger, and that’s rly what art is about and i love taylor for doing that for me and millions of other people

i just feel like this song brings up so many vivid beautiful memories of childhood for so many people, like being outside in the summer and screaming and being free. ugh

the pause after “i hit my peak at seven” before completing the phrase........ OOOOOOOOOF IT HITS TOO HARD

and sound-wise, just so off-beat and cool and unique

best lyrics: “i hit my peek at seven/feet in the swing across the creek” and “are there still beautiful things?” and “love you to the moon and to saturn/passed down like folk songs/the love lasts so long” and “before i learned civility/i used to scream ferociously/any time i wanted”

100000000000/10

AUGUST:

i knew immediately that this would be my favourite tbh like i could sense it the second it began

i wrote my first impression thoughts in my journal and you can tell the exact moment i got to the bridge bc i just started screaming sdnjksdkjsdn

i would 100% get a tattoo that said “to live for the hope of it all”

everything about this song is LITERALLY flawless like i have.......no notes......no thoughts.......it’s just an absolutely perfect song

best lyrics: “back when we were still changing for the better/wanting for was enough/for me it was enough/to live for the hope of it all" and “august sipped away like a bottle of wine/cause you were never mine”

100000000000000000000000000/10

THIS IS ME TRYING:

this song is rly good but i keep forgetting it exists omg :/ once i learn all of the lyrics i’ll appreciate her more

the strings are gorgeous

i was rly surprised that this one was done with jack instead of aaron just bc the bridge of this sounds SOOOO the national

these lyrics could be interpreted in so many different ways depending on the listener’s experiences and that’s beautiful

best lyrics: “i was so ahead of the curve/the curve became a sphere/fell behind all my classmates and i ended up here” and “it’s hard to be at a party when i feel like an open wound/it’s hard to be anywhere these days when all i want is you/you’re a flashback in a film reel on the one screen in my town”

10/10

ILLICIT AFFAIRS:

that soft high note on “down,” “stop,” etc is sooooo nice

i don’t have many thoughts on it, it’s just so soft, SOOOOOO gorgeous instrumentally and lyrically

best lyrics: “it’s born from just one single glance/but it dies and it dies and it dies/a million little times” and “don’t call me kid, don’t call me baby/look at this godforsaken mess that you made me/you showed me colours you know i can’t see with anyone else” and “you taught me a secret language i can’t speak with anyone else/and you know damn well/for you i would ruin myself/a million little times”

100000/10

INVISIBLE STRING:

like i said about tlgad, this is a nice little break from all the angst and pain and anger sdnjksdnskjsd just a sweet little break to remind u there are good things in the world too. so placed really well in the tracklist imo

super super super super cute chorus

so many pretty melodies

absolutely an autumn song btw

best lyrics: “time, mystical time/cutting me open, then healing me fine”

10/10

MAD WOMAN:

i literally lost my mind listening to this for the first time

i have such a thing for scorned women anthems like i will immediately love it whatever it is

the pure rage when she says “cause you took everything from me” gives me full body chills

it is just so eerie and haunting and perfect

best lyrics: “women like hunting witches too/doing your dirtiest work for you/it’s obvious that wanting me dead/has really brought you two together” and “every time you call me crazy i get more crazy/what about that?” and “good wives always know/she should be mad, should be scathing like me/but no one like a man woman”

1000000/10

EPIPHANY:

i find this one so hard to listen to but it’s absolutely beautiful and devastating and so heavily relevant for i think the whole world rn

the heart monitor and the trumpets tying both of the topics in together is so genius and so heartbreaking

i think will be the sygb of folklore where it makes everybody cry so much that it becomes a skip despite being a beautiful song

best lyrics: “something med school did not cover/someone’s daughter, someone’s mother” and “some things you just can’t speak about”

10/10

BETTY:

first of all THE HARMONICA

this made me so happy bc it’s just so debut and so fearless and it made me SOOOOO nostalgic on my first listen, because it really felt to me like i was getting to listen to a song from debut or fearless for the very first time again

it’s just so sweet and cute and simple and yet another very self-aware moment of looking back to her past material/subject matter

best lyrics: “would you have me? would you want me?/would you tell me to go fuck myself/or lead me to the garden?” and “i’m only seventeen, i don’t know anything/but i know i miss you”

10/10

PEACE:

the bass at the beginning is soooooo nice

this miiiiiight be the strongest song on the album lyrics-wise but idk yet

not much to say, it’s just so gorgeous

best lyrics: “i’m a fire and i’ll keep your brittle heart warm/if your cascade ocean wave blues come/all these people think love’s for show/but i would die for you in secret” and “would it be enough if i could never give you peace?” and “i talk shit with my friends, it’s like i’m wasting your honour”

10/10

HOAX:

i have a feeling this one will be underrated/underappreciated bc it’s just simple and dark and the last song, but this is....... a lyrical masterpiece

i feel like i need to be playing this on vinyl with all of the lights off and just a candle burning yknow, like there’s just something so dark and ancient about it

best lyrics: “my winless fight/this has frozen my ground” and “your faithless love’s the only hoax i believe in/don’t want no other shade of blue but you/no other sadness in the world would do” and “you knew it still hurt underneath my scars/from when they pulled me apart/but what you did was just as dark/darling this was just as hard”

10/10

OVERALL: 10000000000/10 literally one of the best albums i have ever heard and (while i wouldn’t put it past her to top it) absolutely the best work of her career. so complex and layered and emotional and painful and genuine and different. not to get ahead of myself but this is/should be considered her blue, her rumours, her abbey road....... god. can’t wait to listen to this album for the rest of my life and play it for my future children and just watch it live on as the greatest work of one of the most important artists of the 21st century

4 notes · View notes

ofcloudsandstars · 5 years ago

Text

Life Update:

I have been away for a BIT but a lot has happened since then. Aside from some crazy energy shifts (some early spooky spirit-level vibes coming from Pluto coming out of Retrograde on the 3rd) having wild vivid dreams and bizarre experiences, there's some that took the cake and also I needed some time to just be quiet and spend my little free time not chatting to anyone or being online.

Anyway a story I wanted to share is the on going saga with that rich man who spent his years saving and conserving a rain forest in Tanzania. We met on Autumn's Eve to discuss his project he was trying to raise money for. He is going through a lot right now cause it's his second Saturn return and this huge farm he owns in Tanzania that he made a shit ton of money from is falling apart due to climate change and corruption. It turns out this man has dabbled in/has interest in the occult (as all bored white rich people do) and was interested in my craft. He's an American born and raised in Louisiana that moved to NYC for a while to write for a magazine, had some wild experiences with a vodou church there and moved to England when he got married but now has been divorced for like 17 years and is still not over it. Anyway I felt comfortable opening up about my practice and that evening anyway I was going to go to a friend's house to do some autumn eve magic and had some stuff in my bag. So he asked for a tarot reading for insight in his future and we like hang out in Hyde park which is GORGEOUS in fall colors right now and I do a reading for him. This is the beginning of a very long story so if you are interested in reading another episode in my hot mess ass life, get a nice cup of tea and click the read more lol.

Essentially we can summarize his current life as his job is going through a tower card phase due to saturn return shaking up all that foundations are weak or no longer serving him. He's supposed to resurrect the rainforest conservation project and he already knows this answer deep down inside. I am like cool that's great we connected cause I have been making a lot of friends recently that are getting involved in forest conservation or are buying land to grow forests on with native trees so its cool we created this friendship. Nice. Now he wants a love reading which I just feel reluctant to do. I already had that feeling you know when someone wants a love reading when they really shouldn't be focusing on that? Its fine though cause Tarot is honest as hell and validates my feelings. He essentially wants someone to distract his current troubles and saturn return lessons to get whisked away in a romance and dump his issues on from the failure of the farm and his divorce of 17 years he's still not over.

He's still unsatisfied so to placate him I do a lenormand reading of what type of lover could suit him now in his troubling time. Lenormand just shows someone that is ambitious and working in the same field but also a side kick. Cool so you want a cheerleader to support you when you are down that’s nice don't we all. He then says the reading is vague and doesn't everyone want that? And I am like no not at all like for example, I currently don't want any relationship I want to work on myself but if I were to have an ideal relationship I'd love it to be with someone who is a home maker, someone who is emotionally available, who's love language is like smothering me physically with affection, definitely not someone who fucks off for two weeks to months at a time to the other side of the hemisphere, but anyway it’s all hypothetical so it doesn't matter. Anyway with his lack of satisfaction I am like, look sir, next week is the Libra new moon, it's a great time to ask to find a partner that will be a great match in this trying time.

I completely forget that I gave him this information. We smoke a blunt he was keeping in his nifty dressy blazer inner pocket and I go off to see my good Aries witch friend and have an INSANE NIGHT where we nearly BURNT down her fucking apartment in an episode of ✧ *:・ﾟFire Magic Gone Wrong *:・ﾟ✧.

I was trying to make some candles for autumn's eve with carved green apples and when I melted the wax we didn't realize how powerful her oven was. Plus my stupid lazy ass left the wick in there. So when we tried to open the oven cause we were smelling the intense smoke, a fucking PLUME of dark smoke would come out BURNING THE SHIT out of our eyes and choke the shit out of us. We tried to open the windows and vents, I tried to quickly pull it out and some wax splashed out and burned the shit out of my leg and arm and I have little burn mark scars now, but with the wick in there with that heat it IGNITED there was a burst of flames coming out, My friend was NOT HAVING IT like imagine an Aries hollerin and a Fire Ablazin and the fire alarm is louder than a fucking rave EDM beat like I was trying to think as clear as possible and see if she had a fire extinguisher she was like: BITCH DO I LOOK LIKE A RESTAURANT TO YOU and so I call the emergency line to get the fire department while she fucking, just, gets a massive fucking cauldron of water and dumps it in the oven and wax is oil so you know what happens when you throw water on flaming oil it fucking EXPLODES so she's like fucking James Bond slow motion running away from a ball of Fire and fortunately the fire is out cause it gets smothered by smoke and water

...so I am like: Oh thank you mr. police sir but the fire is gone no need to come, but as my friend is still HOLLERIN in full panic mode in the background and the police on the phone still hear her Panic and is like: Uh no we are still coming..

Its a bit comical and surreal at this point cause I try to calm my friend down with some water as I air out the apartment and she goes from Hollerin to q u i e t real quick when she hears all these LOUD ass sirens. She's like.. Alex.. What are we gonna tell the police when they arrive?? I am like damn bitch why you acting like we did something contraband like its just an oven fire we extinguished it. But she was having that Black Moment of Fear™ like we were two hot mess black witches gonna have the police up in her apartment due to some dumb ass witchcraft gone wrong like I was still trying to be calm but she was like whispering my name like Aleeexx those sirens, they are coming for us!! And I was like oh my god you are panicking they are probably just police cars for something else we are in London shit happens here all the time.

Anyway the loud sirens just STOP in front of the building and she's like: a l e x... All of a sudden we hear a Bing! And its the fire department outside. We see the windows in the hallway outdoors and this MASSIVE ASS FIRE TRUCK THE SIDE OF THE BUILDING'S WIDTH is just parked there y'all.. The neighbor across the hallway opens her door to see what the fuck is going on and she was not pleased. Since her windows face the street her whole living room looked like a rave disco with red and blue flashing lights she was like what the fuck were you dumbasses doing and my friend is like ohh my god..

So next thing we knew there were 5 Fully geared firemen in the apartment and like.. Miraculously with the power of all that is good in the world there is like no sign that there was ever anything that happened?! So the firemen of course were wanting some explanations. Of course they can smell a little bit of smoke but I am like: Oh yeah sorry it was a grease fire gone wrong it was the first time we used this oven but we managed to squash it, it was just overwhelming and we wanted you guys over just in case it escalated. So one fireman is like snooping around for some further answers like: haha cooking sausages usually kicks up a lot of grease, what were you cooking? And my friend who is guilty as hell is like: its just oil but so sorry wejustletitburnintheovensosorryitwasjust and I am like taking the conversation by the horns like: We were trying a recipe to bake the apples over there (yes the ones still hollowed out on the kitchen counter,) but it went wrong. Anyway the firemen noted that there was like no damage ("don't even mention it to your land lord! Haha!" one says) and they just install two fire alarms for free and leave. So me and my friend who are Shaken from this Drama especially when after the firemen left there was no trace of like anything even happening and this all escalated and deescalated in less than an hour so we just scrap any magic we had planned that night and watch The Craft instead. Autumn’s Eve completed..

Ok so I have a blissful and amazing Mabon then a few days pass and I am back at work with the shenanigans of the weekend out of my mind and I get a text from the old rich guy again. He wants me to come over for dinner on Sunday and chat some more about the forest conservation project. I am a bit annoyed as it's Libra new moon but maybe I could balance dinner with him and go home and do some spells (balance, see what I did there? lol.) So I say yes, it's Libra new moon afterall and maybe its nice to make a new friendship revolving around helping the planet.

He's texting me like: Do you like Oysters? And I am like.. that's so random why Oysters? And he goes on about how he's from Louisiana and he gets homesick so he likes eating them I am like ok I guess.. But he's also like: let me get some Gavi (white wine) and I am starting to get that feeling of unease but I am like: I got to work early the next day so I am not going to drink. He's like ok fine.

I mention it to some of my coworkers and they are teasing me about how this old man wants to 'play in my rainforest' and it makes me want to gag. Like I am hoping that its a case of me misjudging some man like surely this is a sensible old man that is lonely and just is happy to find a friend that cares about the earth and his project? Anyway Sunday night comes and I am on my way to his house. He lives in some gorgeous townhouse off a main street. The stairwell spirals up the 3 floors of the house with exotic trees growing in between the landings and reaching up through the center of the spiral stairs. There are pictures of artwork he's collected as well as some chameleon named after him in the rain forest in Tanzania as a thankyou to his conservation efforts. I get to the second landing before his kitchen and I hear to my DREAD some fucking jazz music. Oh hell no. I immediately am like: I need to use your toilet. So I go to his immensely large bathroom which also has little trees growing in there in between the large sink and deep teal painted clawed foot tub. I am texting my Aries witch friend cause she lives around the corner like: GURL GET ME THE FUCK!! OUT OF HERE!! and she's like: Oh no baby you's in danger, let me know if you need help. So I gather my strength like: Ok he can't be this delusional especially after the Talk and the Tarot on his lovelife and the fact that he's old enough to be my dad, so let me keep the convo friendly and hopefully this will be a big misunderstanding.

I mean by now you know my fool meter is immensely high, but anwyay I go into his kitchen and I ask him boldly what's the occasion for this dinner? So he skirts the question by saying how he designed his home after stuff in Louisiana that he misses blahblah and stuff from the rainforest I am like: Cool, whats the occasion for this dinner? And he's like: You know, celebrating friendship, you want wine? I don't want wine cause I told him I need to go home early I have to work, and he mentions the spare bedroom on the top floor. I tell him I'm uninterested in staying over even though yes it's conveniently 10 minutes walk from my job but I have house plants to take care of (yeah I use that house plants excuse I don't give a fuck! lol). Anyway he steers the conversation to the fresh oysters he just shucked. So we are eating oysters, I try not to put any energy on the nature of him eating his oysters and I direct the conversation to how he came about conserving the rainforest, his networking skills and how he raised money to buy that much land and plant millions of trees. I end up gleaning a lot of helpful and not so much helpful info (I mean, it just helps if you are a wealthy well connected white man lmao), and we even talk about other interesting stuff like I get him to talk about how the stock market works, his daily routine at the members club I work at, William Kamkwamba who built the windmill in Malawi from some inspo from library books (his ex brother in law made a film about it which he suggested I stay over to watch with him, which I declined cause of my house plants I needed to get back to at home), his divorce he can't stop talking about cause he's not truly over it. Anyway dinner is nice, we eat some very unseasoned gumbo he made that reminds him of his childhood and throughout the dinner I am doing shielding energy exercises and channeling the power of Saturn to re-affirm my boundaries and practice the glorious power of "No". So with Saturn's channeled influence I am ready to put an end to the night and I am like: thanks for everything I think I'll go now, but before I go should I help with the dishes? He says no cause: It's a one-man show. I ask him to Elaborate, and instead he offers me to get some chocolate so I am like.. ok...

Anyway he is standing at the other side of his kitchen so I get up to get some and he turns around to embrace me, and y'all... it's a LONG and UNCOMFORTABLE hug complete with 1. back rubbing, 2. neck sniffing, 3. aura invading, so I pull away to ask about what chocolate it is and it's dark chocolate oh god. Anyway this is actually the beginning of the climax of the tension of the night to my foolish self cause this man who is unwillingly ignoring my discomfort has the fucking audacity to ask the question: Do you like dancing? I literally answer him with the same boldness that he asked that question: I hate dancing and never danced in my life. lol. He wasn't taking No for an answer so he decided to be like: Let me show you music I like to dance to. So he puts on some old 70s-esque rock and starts dancing alone in his living room like: Dance with me! I am like No. He says something like: I love dancing it helps to open you up. We all just got to get over our embarrassment and let loose! I am like: Ok I gotta let loose in your toilet again be right back.

So I hide in his bathroom again texting my witch friend like: S.O.S. BITCH let me come over to your apartment and she's like: Oh sorry I am in a party in north London .............. 😭

So I go out to face the mess and he's now trying to get another song I could potentially relate to so he's like: Let me play this song my 13 year old picked out for me.. Great.. Next thing my Ears are hearing is: Mr. Brightside by the Killers and I am dying y'all.. I am over it.. He is taking my laughter as an invitation to get me to dance but now with the full power of Saturn I was like: No. I am going home, I don't feel well, I have been having some kidney issues ("Oh is that why you were always in the bathroom?"- "Yeah that's.. why.. definitely..") and I gotta get up early. So he looks sad. I am like it's ok, we can hang out in the day time, outside of your home next time and talk more about the rainforest conservation. He's like, ok but before you go we have to do this? I am like: Do what?

NEXT THING I KNOW TO MY HORROR I SEE HIM LEAN IN, TAKE MY SIDES AND TRY TO KISS ME AND I AM LIKE:

NO!!

I Push him away, and FLY down his 3 flights of stairs, spiraling down his house, and he's chasing me like fucking No-Face chasing Chihiro saying: I WASN'T GOING TO PUT MY TONGUE IN YOUR MOUTH!! The fact that he said that I could feel my fucking bootyhole clench with dismay. I was mortified. I grabbed my shoes and was like.. see you around I guess (He is a regular at my job lol), and I fly down the street.

When I get home he texts me if I have a moment for a chat so I am like ok fine why not? He fucking VIDEO CALLS ME and on top of it is eating something fucking nasty and I have misophonia so I am fucking disgusted and I turn off my video (I mean its like modern millenial tech etiquette but video calls are pretty intimate or you have to prepare for them, just springing up a video chat is a bit violating?) and he's like: Oh should I turn off my video too? I don't answer.. so he does..

So he calls to essentially apologize. He admits that I at MANY TIMES have expressed that I was not interested in any relationship other than friendship and that he just wanted a friendly kiss on the mouth and it wasn't supposed to be sexual. Ok... He also says that he doesn't understand why we can't be intimate and be friends.. With my DEAD SILENCE he then fills it like: Ok yeah that's true there is a massive age gap and different comforts with intimacy.. He then admits he has a sexual attraction to me and it would be dishonest to say otherwise but we should still be friends.. I am like: I wouldn't mind being friends but I can't trust someone who doesn't respect my boundaries like I have boundaries. We end with him saying: I understand, you have your boundaries then.. Lol.

Anyway as a blessing I haven't seen him since..

It took me like a full several days later after seeing another witchy friend who asked me about my new moon libra rituals I realized I didn't get to HAVE ANY cause he fucking Eclipsed my night with his bullshittery, that it was actually my fault as I gave him an idea to use that evening to try to find a partner when I did his tarot reading on Autumn Eve but instead he was trying to use all kinds of tricks of seduction for me to be his unwilling cheerleader. Goes to show that a man can spend years of his life planting 16.7 million trees and still be trash lol.

-------

Other than those recent drama episodes not much has happened to me other than some resurfaced trauma and closure from years ago in college that ended a chapter in my life for me once Pluto came out of retrograde. Other mildly exciting news, I also worked my Alchemist friend's bar yesterday on Sunday for a Fungi Fest in Hoxton. (Look up her work she's Mama Xanadu she does cool shit.) She made non-alcoholic cocktails potions with spirits based with roots and herbs like damiana, maca, passion flower etc that makes you feel energized but also mellow (three spirit is one of the partners that work with her their stuff is kind of nice though you do feel like you're drinking some type of brew) and her brews were made from different mushroom infusions like one was a delicious turkeytail brew made with hibiscus and douglas fir and another was with kombucha and seabuckthorn juice and one with a mushroom named amethyst deceiver and hops. She also makes her own essences and made some mushroom essences (like flower essences but with the vibrational influence of mushrooms) to add in there. I met some interesting and Strange people like you do at any alternative spiritualish wholesome event. I met a beautiful boy who is sadly in a relationship that we vibed very hard to the unfortunate dismay of his disgruntled girlfriend and I met a couple from poland who looked like a lost boys vampire couple (one was dressed in a black iridescent latex trenchcoat with one long earring with playing cards attached to it with long hair and his girlfriend had like layers of black scarves and coat like some mori grunge style with a black bowl hat on) who were trying to convince me how MDMA is the same as medicinal mushrooms and that it's its own type of spiritual ritual now. (I was like, sure Jäan..). Now that I have had a moment to like rest and reflect, and accept that I can't save some of my house plants and my life's direction still seems so uncertain and Hot Mess I am like ready to focus on my craft again and interact with my blog lol.

Anyway if you read until the end wow, thanks so much. I hope you had a great new moon.

#personal story #get ready for another one y'all

8 notes · View notes

artsy-dreamer · 6 years ago

Text

Brotp ask meme

I came across this ask meme by @seasonal-brotp-prompts (really great blog by the way, you should check it out) and I thought I’d try filling it out ^u^

1) Your first BROTP?

I’m gonna say Samantha and Nellie? (Samantha will forever be my favorite American Girl :D )

2) The first BROTP you had after you learned what a BROTP was (if different than #1)?

Sunil and Vinnie, I think? (from LPS)

3) Your overall all-time favorite BROTP?

*inhales* CINNABUDS!!!!

(aka Jun Hiiragi and Kakeru Kogure from Onegai My Melody)

I could go on for HOURS about how much I love these two and why I love them so much... but I have other questions to answer XD I will tell you why I call them “Cinnabuds” though! I’ve often had the tendency to call Kakeru “cinnamon roll” and Jun “cinnamon dork”, and they’re best buds for life, so that’s how I came up with the name :p Not to mention that their friendship is sweeter than Cinnabon! :D

4) The BROTP currently giving you ~the feels~?

Also Cinnabuds... the ending of s2e37 is so sweet, just thinking about it makes me a little emotional sometimes :,)

5) Your favorite BROT3+?

Hmm... I’m gonna have to go with Fritz, Mistel and Raeger from Story of Seasons! I’ve never actually played the game myself, but I love the characters and their stories, and I like to imagine these three all being kinda like brothers ^u^ (Raeger is the exasperated dad friend, lol)

6) Any BROTPs you dislike/disapprove of? How come?

Hmm... not really?

7) We’ve all heard of the “friends to lovers” trope, but are there any canon lovers you wish would go back to being just friends?

None come to mind... 🤔

8) Any OC BROTPs (with your own, other people’s, or a mix?)

The only one that really comes to mind are two OCs I made years and years ago- Tanya, a Japanese-American girl who loves gymnastics and cute things, and Allison, a laid-back country girl from uhhh... I forget, was it Tennessee?? Yeah, I never developed those two very well XD That was a time in my life where I was making OCs by the dozen but only doing a little with each of them...

9) A BROTP of yours that most of the fandom ships romantically?

Try almost all my brotps ever... D,: But to name one, I feel like the only Animal Crossing fan who prefers Julian and Colton as friends 🤷‍♀️ (plz don’t hate me)

10) Ever started friendshipping something because of somebody else?

When I first came across this drawing by @suzanami, I fell in love with the idea of Beau and Zell having a brotherly relationship! I thought it was such a cute idea, and it remains one of my all-time favorite Animal Crossing headcanons to this day ^u^ They don’t seem to actually be related, though (Beau has 7 siblings, while Zell has 3) so I came up with my own backstory for them- Beau’s dad died when he was very young, and since he didn’t have any older brothers to look up to, his neighbor Zell took him under his wing when they were kids, and they’ve been as close as real brothers ever since ^u^

11) Any crossover BROTPs?

I... don’t really think about crossovers a whole lot? ^^;

12) Are most of your BROTPs m/m, f/f, or m/f?

M/M

13) Admit it: do you have any self-insert BROTPs?

Me and Punchy, tbh XD

14) Do you tend to friendship certain tropes, and if so, which ones? (Villain/Hero, Smol/Tol, Punk/Pastel, ect.)

I’ve noticed a pattern with my favorite brotps- one tends to be extroverted, adorkable, and a little dumb, while the other is more introverted, sensible, and constantly facepalming at their best friend’s crazy antics... but at the end of the day, they care a lot about each other, and truly enjoy being in each other’s company ^u^

15) Tag at least 3 people to fill out this meme!

Hmmm... I’ll tag @kookyshygirl88, @simplyghosting and @secret--psalms--saturn (if you want to ^^;)

#seasonal brotp prompts #ask meme #brotp #platonic #gen #whats this?? an original post?? XD #this took me way too long to finish filling out lol #but it was fun sharing my thoughts #ive had that beau and zell headcanon for years #also sbp if you’re reading these #your reply on my moodboard made me smile so much!#i read it over and over again ^u^#i couldn’t reply to your reply but I wanted you to know that :)

12 notes · View notes

opalai-pixel-witch · 7 years ago

Text

He woke up to nothing (Ethan/Norman fanfic thing)

Sooo...I decided to go for it and post a fanfiction I’ve written here, since I haven’t been making a lot of art lately. Aaand of course it’s Jaydars fanfiction :P Basically fluff and hurt/comfort stuff. I hope it’s at least somewhat enjoyable ;u; If you want to see more, please let me know!

Summary: Norman reflects on the insecurities that followed him into his new life. As it turns out, Ethan has his own share of insecurities too.

Four months of living at the Mars' residence, and Norman Jayden still wasn't quite used to it yet.

He had always lived alone, after finding a place of his own and before becoming involved in the Origami Killer case. He never went out of his way to make friends or find possible roommates, and so he was used to managing on his own. It was better for him anyway, he thought--for as long as Norman could remember, having company around brought him anxiety, a sensation he grew skilled at hiding but not at overcoming.

One cat was not anxiety-inducing company, and thus Saturn didn't count.

The profiler's introduction to ARI and Triptocaine didn't do wonders for his social life either. He was already very reclusive, being focused solely on his work, but the addictions brought along all the more reason for him to hide himself away from other people--especially when the withdrawal symptoms would kick in. He never wanted to let on that he had a problem, both due to the risk of it putting his job on the line and the issue usually causing more trouble than it was worth.

And then there was the issue of work itself--it took up a considerable portion of his time, it would sometimes get him traveling from place to place, and as evident from the previous case, it involved a fair amount of danger. He couldn’t take the risk of bringing anybody into a life like that. What was the point of becoming close to someone if you were most likely going to lose them in some way?

Those were the main reasons Norman saw connecting with people as a hindrance, and tried to avoid it when possible. He would've been lying if he claimed not to feel a bit lonely at times, but in the long run, it was just another small obstacle. He went on with his life not expecting anyone to open themselves up to him willingly, or go out of their way to help him, or show any sign of sorrow when he would be gone.

And he certainly never would've expected to find himself in the bed of the man he'd helped save the child of. And yet here he was.

Norman didn't think he'd come back to this town at all, with the awful memories it would bring, and its corrupt police force, and the rainfall that seemed like it would never end. He expected the possibility of living there even less.

I guess there are just certain people who make up for all of that, he thought to himself as he pulled the covers over his head. There may be a Carter Blake, but there's also an Ethan Mars, and that's more than enough to balance him out.

As if on cue, he heard the soft sounds of footsteps entering the room, and shortly after an amused voice asking him, "Are you hiding from me, Norman?"

"Mmf...no." The younger man pulled the covers down just a bit to make his voice sound more audible. "It's just a habit of mine. I tend to bury myself in the covers when ah'm going to sleep.."

"You're so cute," he heard Ethan reply, a faint teasing tone in his voice. Norman couldn't help but smirk, trying to ignore the heat of his face as he felt the weight of the architect settling next to him.

"I am not," he retorted. “I just don’t tolerate the cold too well." He moved the covers down a little more to get a good look at Ethan, his blush growing hotter as he covered his mouth in a sudden surplus of shyness from seeing him in nothing but his briefs.

It wasn't his first time seeing Ethan like that--Hell, he'd seen him wearing even less--just seeing his lover revealed like that always got that reaction out of him. Norman never understood people who slept in only their underwear, whereas he himself slept in a t-shirt and sweatpants.

Also, it didn't help that Ethan looked really attractive without a shirt on.

"Let me help warm you up, then," Ethan said, getting into the covers and huddling up close to the profiler. Norman pulled the covers over both their heads and gently rested his head on Ethan's shoulder, and in turn he felt the older man's warm arms wrap around him lovingly, pulling him closer so both of their bodies were right up against each other. Norman exhaled softly at his touch--he always felt safe and comfortable when Ethan held him like that.

Norman moved his head back away from Ethan's shoulder, only for his vivid green eyes to meet his partner's gentle blue ones. It was nearly impossible for him to maintain his composure under the father's affectionate gaze, and even if the shade brought on by the covers prevented him from viewing them properly, that didn't stop the feeling of warmth that spread throughout his body, that excited yet calming feeling he would always get whenever he'd spend time doing things like this with Ethan.

"Is something on your mind?" Ethan asked, interrupting his train of thought.

Norman managed to snap out of his trance and bring his focus back to reality. He looked Ethan over again as he thought about how to answer without sounding too mushy, taking note of the soft smile on his face, but also the slight worry in his eyes.

Worry was not a new look on Ethan--and for good reason. After losing one son and finding your remaining child trapped in a flooding well for about three days, how else were you supposed to feel?

But Norman wanted to get rid of that expression. Ethan shouldn't have to feel worried when everything was okay now.

"Nah," he answered. "Not...Not really, I...uh, I just...I like your eyes."

The heat in his face returned, this time out of embarrassment. Only around Ethan did he ever have trouble finding the proper words. How eloquent of you, Norman.

But it must've been a good enough answer for Ethan, because the architect was now grinning from ear to ear, and the concern usually settled in his eyes faded away. Norman received a tender squeeze as a reward, and could not help but return the smile.

"Thanks, Norm," Ethan replied, lips brushing up against Norman's cheek as he leaned in to kiss him. "Yours are nice too, if I do say so myself."

"They're nothin' in comparison," Norman said, glancing off to the side for a second as he felt himself grow shy again.

"Shh," Ethan hushed him. "I don't want to hear any of that. You have beautiful eyes, and that's final."

He then pressed a kiss to the younger man's lips, starting off gentle at first before pushing a bit harder to convey the passion he felt. Norman quickly reciprocated, leaning into the kiss to deepen it as he brought his arms around Ethan's waist. As the two of them continued to exchange kisses, Norman took in everything he felt during the moment—any time Ethan would hold him a little tighter, or lean in a bit further, or a hand would stroke the side of his body as both men tried to shift into more comfortable positions as they did this. Norman loved and longed for every second of it, every second that involved being close to the man he had fallen for.

Eventually they stopped before they could get too carried away, and once the lights were out they settled into bed, snuggled up close to one another as they drifted off into sleep.

————

Norman found himself waking up in the middle of the night--to absolutely nothing.

No nightmares had. No withdrawal he was forced to endure. No danger he needed to stop. Just nothing at all but the silence and the darkness of the bedroom. It was far more preferable, at least as preferable as waking up during the night went.

The profiler sat up slightly and looked over at the room, taking in his surroundings and making sure that there really wasn't anything wrong. Everything around him was quiet and tranquil, even outside the house where it actually wasn't raining for once. He wondered for a brief moment if Shaun had another nightmare and came into the room for reassurance, but he brushed off the idea, remembering that he didn’t hear anyone’s voice upon his awakening.

Norman then noticed the feeling of something at the other side of the bed, taking up space near his feet. He leaned in a little further to see that Saturn had come to join them, and was now curled up cozily in her slumber as well. A small smile crossed his features as he reached over to scratch the back of her head, getting a groggy mewl out of the cat.

Once sure that everything was in order, he lied back down on the bed to try and get himself back to sleep, only to feel a pair of arms pull him into a tight embrace. He felt Ethan right up against his back, his head pressed up against his shoulder. His smile grew a bit wider as he gently grabbed the older man's hand, giving it a light squeeze.

"An' what're you doing up so late, Ethan?" he asked in a hushed voice.

"It's, um...it's nothing."

Ah. That voice. It was a particular tone that Norman had grown to recognize instantly, both from Ethan and from most people he associated with in previous cases. It was a tone of apprehension. Ethan was fearful about something.

"Ethan...?"

"I'm just..." He felt his partner's body shifting a bit uncomfortably from behind him. "...I just wanted to make sure you were still here."

Norman turned his head to look back over at Ethan, unable to get a clear glimpse of his face due to him ducking his head downward. "Well...yeah, of course. Why wouldn't I be?"

"I...I-I dunno, I..." Ethan moved his head back up to meet the younger man's eyes. "I'm still afraid of--of losing you or Shaun. It's pointless. You shouldn't worry about it."

"But you worry about my problems all the time," Norman responded, turning himself around in Ethan's hold to face him as concern took over his expression. "Did somethin' happen earlier? Ehnothah nightmare or ehnethin’?”

"No...No, e-everything's fine. Really. I just need to be close to you right now." The architect rested his head on Norman's shoulder, his grasp not weakening for even a second. "You don't mind, do you?"

"Of course not," Norman answered. “Ah’m just trying to look out for you.”

The room grew silent again after his response, but he didn’t mind. He was never really the type of man who wanted to talk for hours on end. He was completely content with remaining warm and secure in his lover’s arms, and he hoped that he could help him feel the same way.

“You are happy here, right?” Ethan asked him softly.

“I nevuh felt bettuh,” Norman replied. “Why do you ask?”

“Just making sure. I, um…noticed that you sometimes look…distant. I-I’m not saying that’s not okay or anything—“

“It’s just how I am,” the younger man responded. “How ah’ve always been. Nevuh tried to get close to people before…” He ducked his head downward a bit and looked off to the side, tensing up slightly. It felt strange, opening up to Ethan about this topic. “…ah’m still adjusting to it is all. You’ll have to be patient with me. Ah’m not used to living with others, an’…this might sound stupid, but I feel a bit like ah’m intruding…like I don’t actually belong here or somethin’.”

Norman hoped that Ethan wouldn’t take that the wrong way. He truly wanted to be here, and he wouldn’t have traded his nights sleeping by the father’s side and his days spending time with him and Shaun for anything else the world had to offer him. But he had been alone for so long before this, it was almost like he couldn’t be anything but that.

“I didn’t think that was something you’d worry about,” Ethan said after a moment of silence. “I mean…I asked you to stay with us. If I didn’t want you here, I wouldn’t have given you the key. And Shaun was really excited too, when we told him you were moving in...and he's actually been sleeping a lot better since then.”

Well, okay. That was a better response than I was expecting. The tone within his voice didn’t betray his words either, it seemed. The architect didn’t sound hurt or irritated--he instead sounded merely confused. Not to mention the way Ethan's reminder that he was wanted warmed his heart...and could it have been true that Shaun was having less difficulty with sleep because of him?

Still, Norman felt like he should have admitted that differently, in a way that didn’t sound so somber. After all, it was Ethan who was currently feeling anxious about matters, and so it was up to Norman to help soothe him.

“Let’s just say you’re not the only one who stresses out ovuh things he shouldn’t,” the profiler sighed, shutting his eyes. “An’ ehneway, it’s nothin’ serious at all. It’s just a consequence of living alone for so long.”

He then took Ethan’s face into his hands and placed a kiss upon his lips, one that was quick but long enough to express the affection he wanted to convey. His shoulders tensed up slightly as he pulled away, due to the fact that he wasn’t used to initiating their kisses, but he could see his partner’s expression, even with how dark the room was, and any insecurity he had felt before was chased away by the reminder of just how cute Ethan looked when he was caught off-guard.

“But you know what? If I shouldn’t worry about intruding because you gave me the key, then you shouldn’t worry about me not enjoying myself.” He drew his arms around his lover’s torso, one hand slowly and gently caressing his back. “Because if I didn’t want to be here, I wouldn’t have accepted the key."

Already he could feel Ethan relaxing under his touch, and he could not help but smile a little in success. Ethan's arms were still wrapped quite firmly around him--not that he would ever complain about that--but he felt his chest up against his, falling a bit as he exhaled and the tension began to leave his body.

"An' you wanna know somethin' else, Ethan?" Norman asked, lowering his voice to a soft whisper as he gave a tender squeeze to Ethan. "You an' Shaun have made my life a lot bettuh, too. I don't even want to think about where I might be right now if you hadn't contacted me again. But I don't hafta think about that now...an' neither should you."

Finally, he heard a soft, shaky laugh from the architect. The hold around him began to weaken slightly, much to his dismay, but he knew that it meant Ethan was growing calmer now, and for that he couldn’t feel that twinge of disappointment for very long at all.

“I’m so glad I have you here, Norm,” he sighed, relief and adoration flooding the tone in his soft voice. “I always feel better when I talk to you.”

“Ah’m happy I could help,” Norman responded, allowing his smile to spread wider across his face. “An’ you should remember that ah’m not going ehnewhere if you don’t want me to. We're all here, we're all safe, an' ah’ll make certain that nothin’ like what we’ve been through before evuh happens to us again.”

He felt Ethan’s arm slowly move up his body, and a hand reached up to caress his cheek—it was his left hand, he noticed, due to the pinky finger that felt partially missing against his skin, another reminder of what the father had been put through months ago. Another reminder of what Norman wanted to prevent from happening again, that protecting this man and his child was his top priority now, no matter what the circumstances turned out to be. He leaned into his lover’s hand as it moved up further, fingers running through his thick, dark hair.

“I promise to do the same for you,” Ethan murmured, absent-mindedly playing with the younger man’s hair. “After everything that’s happened, I’m not taking the chance of risking my loved ones to danger."

"I know you won’t,” Norman whispered, still eagerly leaning into Ethan’s touch for a moment before moving over to kiss him again, looking into his eyes with a compassionate expression in his own. “I know how anxious you’ve been about things aftuh our situation. I can tell that it’s been affecting you more often recently.”

“I’m sorry.” Ethan ducked his head down quickly, a faint look of regret crossing his face. “I didn’t want it to be obvious. I did what I could to try to hide it, but…”

Norman gently grabbed his lover’s chin and brought him to make eye contact with him once more. “You don’t hafta apologize, Ethan. An’ you don’t hafta hide your anxiety from me. You know ah’d always try to help you howevuh I could…don’t you?”

With only a slight amount of hesitation, Ethan nodded. “Yeah…I-I do.”

“Good.”

Silence took over the two of them once again, though it was a different type of silence than before. Despite the reassurances the profiler kept supplying, the atmosphere still felt somewhat tense to him. But he knew it was impossible to chase all of Ethan’s fears away. It was just one more thing they had to endure together.

He then felt a bit startled when Ethan’s arms tightened around him again all of a sudden.

“Ethan?”

“I think I still need to be close to you,” the older man whispered. “If you don’t mind.”

The tension melted away in an instant, and Norman rested his forehead upon Ethan's, nuzzling him slightly in the process. “You know I don’t mind.”

Ethan laughed a bit in response as he proceeded to snuggle up closer to Norman, his embrace as warm and firm as ever. Norman hummed softly at the feeling of extra warmth as the two of them made themselves comfortable in their positions again, and soon after they felt themselves slowly drifting off into sleep once more. It always felt good knowing that he was helping out his new family, and he also couldn't help but feel a hint of relief from getting his own insecurities off his chest--even if he didn't get direct answers to them.

"Norman, I love you," Ethan murmured into his ear, trying (but failing) to suppress a yawn.

"I love you too, Ethan."

But going by everything the architect had told him, perhaps he didn't need direct answers after all.

#Heavy Rain #Ethan Mars #Norman Jayden #Norman Jayden/Ethan Mars #Jaydars

15 notes · View notes