#so even if the other test doesn't find anything (which I doubt going off the results from the test I got back already)

[thelastspeecher]

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[blacklunardice]

Request: I really loved the artist darling headcannons for Wade Wilson. Could you maybe do headcannons for Wade were he kidnaps his s/o and they constantly try to escape and tell him they hate him when he asks why? Like would he punish them or something and how?

✦Constantly Escaping✦

Warning(s): Post Kidnapping, Mentions of Punishment

Escaping Wade is 50/50 in terms of success, but the majority of the time he manages to catch you before you get too far. He finds it...fun seeing what plans you come up with. Of course, he doesn't treat your attempts as seriously as other yanderes would. He laughs it off, poking fun at you for how silly you are before taking you back inside the safe house. "Let's get back inside now, pookie." He would probably say while princess carrying you.

The man is a trained mercenary, so it's not that difficult to hunt you back down. So he takes everything in stride to your annoyance (probably, depending on you). If that wasn't bad enough, he skips over to your body lying on the floor after he just tripped you up with whatever (after another attempt). He'd sit right next to you, ask how was your time this attempt, and literally point out the mistakes you made during your escape. He won't really do anything drastic as punishment. He's pretty lenient when it comes to you, but he just doesn't want to hurt you. That's a line he wouldn't cross because he'd hate himself if you ever got hurt. By someone else's hands or his own.

Punishments with Wade are pretty simple; like disciplining a child. He'd either keep you in the room for you (until the time was up or when he got impatient/lonely and wanted your presence again) or take away any 'privileges' you have in this situation. He doesn't seem angry. Maybe a little annoyed in a playful sense, but not mad. However, despite his casual and jokester demeanor, he takes your attempts into consideration. Just in case.

I don't think he'd ask why you're trying to escape right away. It takes a while and certain buttons are being pushed to actually hit a nerve/get him to act serious. In this scenario, you'd probably just say you hate him in a moment of frustration or to get under his skin. Or in another, he'd just throw the question in the air without much weight to it and you'd answer with that. Either way, after hearing your words, he pauses for a moment. It's the first time where he's... at a loss for words. For a moment, it scares you a little.

That is until he goes back to talking and making jokes; brushing off your words. Despite that, a part of him was hurt by your words. Did you really mean that? Even with the way he presents himself to the world, Wade still has insecurities and fears. He tries to push the questions, doubts, and thoughts away. He couldn't think like that. Still, he needs to put them to rest in some way. Which is where his next actions will go.

He brings things from your old home. Even the bed you used to sleep in. You couldn't even begin wondering how in the world he was able to pull this off, especially with the vague answers he gave. This is his attempt to make things more comfortable for you. "You have such a comfy bed, you know. Gave it a test run; I couldn't resist. Like jumping on one of those beds at the mall." Wade already knew where you lived way before he kidnapped you. He smacks himself on the head for not considering bringing any of your belongings. "Of course! It was obvious from the start!"

This is essentially Wade's way of keeping you happy. Your happiness is his happiness. He'd hate to see you all depressed since your personality and smile are what he fell for. You becoming a husk of yourself would break his heart. So he's doing this for compensation.

[lemonwood31]

This is not so much an analysis as an appreciation post: I don't think I'm saying anything that hasn't already been said, and it's mostly just some general long-winded appreciative flailing. This time about my absolute favourite aspect of Halsin's character: his self-confidence. 

I absolutely see Halsin's self-confidence and his emotional vulnerability as two sides of the same coin: barring a few moments when he's genuinely taken by surprise (like accidentally wildshaping during sex), I see most of Halsin's vulnerable moments as risks that he's taking deliberately, and that takes a lot of guts. It interests me that those moments start very early on in your time with him; he doesn't strike me as particularly testing the waters with you to see if it's safe to open up, and then becoming more willing to be vulnerable as he gets to know you better; he's just... up front about his feelings and his doubts, right from the beginning. Like, if you're willing to ask a genuine question about what he thinks or feels, then he's going to respond with honesty, even if he doesn't know you very well. 

So, as much as I adore emotionally-vulnerable Halsin, that aspect of his personality (for me! I don't think there's any such thing as the One Correct Take!) is on a continuum with self-confident Halsin. 

Halsin who will talk to you about his doubts about his leadership ability, but also stands by his decisions: he doesn't give two shits what you, a person he's just met, think of his decision about Kagha, to the point that if you approve of it in a way he finds condescending, he literally tells you 'I'm glad you approve, but I don't care'. 

Halsin who is surprised you're interested, and shows it, when you ask about his likes and dislikes, but also refuses to feel embarrassed or apologise for using nature metaphors and talking about the Shadow Curse a lot, and has some fairly strong lines to tell people off about it when they try to suggest he should. 

Halsin who is nervous to tell you he's interested in you, and admits it (which again, takes a lot of guts), but who, before that moment, has a bunch of flirty lines with you where he basically lets on he's interested but is biding his time ('Not what. Who. But all in due course.' I have never in my life fallen harder or faster for a fictional character than when he said that to my Tav on my first playthrough), lines which speak, I think, to the fact that understandable nervousness aside, he really does know what he's doing in romantic situations; there's a quiet, restrained deliberateness about that flirting, on a par with the deliberateness I think he approaches most situations with. 

Halsin who may well not have fully dealt with his time as a sex slave, but who responds to your scepticism about whether he's processed it by hearing you out, admitting you have a point, but also (I think) not just adopting your view of the situation as his own, and instead resolving to take some time to reflect on it, to try it on for size and see how it fits in with his own views and recollections. 

Halsin who can struggle in social situations, and has been hurt a lot by other people's cruelty or indifference, and has led a life curtailed by his guilt and grief over the Shadow Curse, but has also lived for 350 goddamn years and had time to develop a whole lot of wisdom and perspective. Who has been a leader for a hundred of those years, and despite his doubts and failings has had a lot of experience with it, and probably has a keener sense of his failings because he's had so much experience of watching his own decisions play out and knows intimately, now, how much of leadership is about trade-offs and least worst options. Who is always, when it comes down to it, completely, unapologetically himself, even when other people don't like it, even when it might be convenient to pretend otherwise, even when he's risking being hurt again by doing so. It takes a lot of confidence to be that true to yourself, I think.

[vaultof-thoughts]

DOUBTS, INSERCURITY AND ANXIETY

The title is blood red, why? because when I used to have doubts, and still didn't really understand non-dualism at all, my brain would set off alarms with flickering fiery red lights. As if they were forbidden , as if I was committing some crime and conducting treason. Many of us find it difficult to deal with doubts, anxiety, insecurity because it just feels so bad, so ickish... so painful an it instantly sends us into a spiral- "Oh No! I'm not supposed to be thinking this, I'm supposed to be Zen and indifferent all the time!" "NO!!! All my progress has gone to waste.." (spoiler alert: there is no progress to be made) or just endless interaction with the (seeming) thought and just piling on to the insecurity and discomfort. Trust me, we've ALL been there, and it's COMPLETELY and ABSOLOUTELY normal and OKAY. Because guess what? This will blow your mind: IT IS IRRELEVENT. I'm serious. You could think the most gruesome, ugly, thoughts about yourself and your dream but it doesn't affect " " at all. SO, what does this mean? It means these thoughts aren't yours!! You aren't the thinker!! CELEBRATE that for a moment! bask in freedom of that realization. These thoughts are from of the ego, or character or WHATEVER. Thing is, this ego is an illusion.

Thoughts, feelings, sensations, DESIRES = Ego

Ego = "the ego doesn’t exist. It’s not a person nor an entity or anything like that. It’s just a longtime held onto perception. It’s just a pile of ideas, concepts, states of mind, thoughts and feelings that we’re clung to and built upon like a castle of cards. It was never you. It was never truly real. It seemed to be because you were it. It cannot exist without you knowing yourself as it." - @crystaldust

Conclusion is, whatever you are going through right now, you are not actually going through. (sounded better in my head) Instead, there is only " " observing a ILLUSIONARY life with a nice lil character and basically in different forms. So everything is " " (the character, the life, other people, the dirty clothes on your floor you're not gonna clean up, etc) are all just different forms of " " so basically just " " observing " " which also mean that nothing is REALLY happening. Like yes I just failed my chemistry test but is there really anything happening here?? without labels, words and meaning what is there? no thing. So even the doubtful, fearful, anxious and insecure thoughts are nothing, you are assigning illusionary meaning to them and on top of that taking them to be you. Like? And what is absoloutellyyy hilarioussss is that " " put this dream or play on itself, and on purpose for fun, and you're acting like it's the end of the world.

On a more serious note though, I know how hard it can be to see negative thoughts for what they really are! and to stop taking the illusion so seriously. There's death, murder, poverty, starvation and many things to react to. I know it can be hard. I know trust me, but in all honesty, guys, you are the observer! not the person. And again, I will repeat this until your ears bleed. It is ALL COMPLETELY Illusionary. This does not mean you're not allowed to bawl your eyes out or react to anything at all- infact, I mean the contrary. Do WHAT YOU WANT. It doesn't matter, there is no "process" to mess up on here. Just come back and notice " " It's always there anyway even observing right now. And remember not to be harsh on yourself and take good care of yourself :) and most importantly have fun.

(im super sorry this post is very long and chaotic im going to try to add some pretty colors and pictures and stuff in later so that people actually read it but bye and ily)

[respectthepetty]

Because I'm making Dangerous Romance my entire personality for the next three months, I need everyone to understand just how smart I think Sailom is, and who would I be without a wild ass theory?

TLWR: Sailom is going to make Kanghan care about him, so he will get good grades because Kanghan's grandma will pay off all his debts and possibly dangle a university scholarship in front of him, but Kanghan will find out and think this was another way someone used him for money, and that Sailom doesn't care about him.

Sailom got away from Kanghan by helping the teacher after the bullying incident. He outsmarted Kanghan at the car wash with the credit card switch. Then, he kissed Kanghan in front of everyone recording.

However, Sailom always understands the assignment and does his homework. Literally. And this is why he is smarter than everyone else.

Sailom is on an academic scholarship. Kanghan knows that.

Kanghan didn't just rip up Sailom's papers to bother Sailom. He did it because no paper = no score = no academic scholarship. Instead of fighting Kanghan, telling a teacher about it, or panicking, Sailom immediately got to work. Even when Kanghan followed him to the cafeteria, and Guy wanted to fight them, Sailom stayed focused.

Because to Sailom, Kanghan is a waste of his time. Sailom has goals greater than that school and knows Kanghan doesn't. It's not worth his time to fight Kanghan because 1) Kanghan can't really lose since he has money and power behind him and 2) Kanghan doesn't really have anything to lose since he doesn't care about anything.

And this is where Sailom will prove he is really smart - he will give Sailom something to care about.

I believe Kanghan is going to break Sailom's laptop because the laptop is the way Sailom does his homework. He even unplugs the computer in the episode two preview because if Sailom can't do his homework, he can't get good grades, and he certainly can't buy another laptop.

So it's really Kanghan's fault that Sailom's accepts the grandmother's offer because he needs money for a new laptop.

They are enemies. Sailom wouldn't want to be around a guy who doesn't care, but when Kanghan gets in trouble (this is the school, so the grandmother will be called there since the dad is busy), she will ask the honor student to tutor her grandson.

But that's the first deal. The one Kanghan knows about.

Because Sailom will lose that job, so either Kanghan doesn't pass his tests (doubtful), or he figures out there is more at stake for Sailom than originally discussed and there is a falling out.

Because the grandma will hire Sailom again after the original deal.

And that's when she offers him the bigger prize that wasn't mentioned in front of Kanghan, and Sailom, who always understands the assignment, will do his homework.

Kanghan asks Sailom why he accepts the offer instead of taking the money and running.

And Sailom answers honestly.

But, once again, I don't think Kanghan understands the extent of the deal. Saving money to pay off a debt versus the grandma willing to pay off his entire family's debt (brother's included if not more, like a university scholarship) is different.

Because the real conflict here is Sailom thinks Kanghan pities him.

And much like Only Friends' Ray, Kanghan will throw money around to control others.

While Kanghan believes people only want him because of his money.

So for a boy who doesn't care about anything in life since he uses money to control others because he thinks he is only wanted for his money . . .

Wouldn't it be smart to give him something to care about that he thinks money can't buy? Like Sailom's love and support? Because daddy will probably buy his way onto the team, which will only hurt Kanghan more.

So it would really hurt if he found out that it was all about the money for Sailom, the one person he thought was above it all.

Or at least for him to think that.

[aleksanderscult]

A follow up to my other question; if we had a sun summoner (basically an entirely different person than Alina) that really was the strong-willed person who wanted to stand by his side and take part in his fight for the Grisha, what do you think he would have wanted that to look like? (And i mean beyond the fold-plot part of the show because we know the plot of s&b and how she messed everything up.) Do you think he would’ve ever allowed the sun summoner to act as a soldier as he had? I think I have a hard time imagining an Aleksander that would allow the sun summoner to go out and be in any possible danger without him present which sounds incredibly limiting to what they’d actually be able to do. I can’t imagine them being allowed to make very many political moves if he got his ruler/queen without his say so and approval, (especially not alina because every political move or even thought she had was actively stupid or the opposite of helpful) so I struggled to understand what he would’ve wanted and expected from them post-expanding the fold. Would a sun summoner with military experience or political experience like himself be able to ever convince him to let them go on military missions by themselves without him? I’m basically trying to understand what we could’ve had he would’ve been like. What would he actually be like if he had gotten the strong-willed, empathetic, political savvy with a functioning brain kind of sun summoner and what Aleksander wanted…and deserved. So much of the character we saw with Aleksander was who he had to be when dealing with someone like Alina, who just couldn’t think for herself, didn’t want to, had no political understanding on the most basic of levels, and didn’t have a spine for practically anything. This isn’t an anti-alina ask, i’m just wondering what type of Aleksander we could’ve gotten with the type of person i described above and what he would’ve wanted from them and allowed them to do. I’m really curious as to what he could’ve been like and truthfully what he had in mind because I struggle to picture what he actually wanted or what he would’ve done had he gotten the type of summoner he deserved

Okay, let's pretend that he got the Sun Summoner that he truly wanted and dreamed of (as you said).

First of all, he would take his time to figure her out. Her views and opinion about him and the Grisha persecution (just like he did with Alina in S&B). Let's say that she passed the test here. Let's say that he found her logical, strong, determined and fierce.

The next stop would be for Aleksander to trust her. He doesn't trust someone easily and he would have to make sure that this girl is worthy of his own thoughts and plans. That would take some time and it would depend on how trustworthy and honest that Sun Summoner would be. Let's say that in time she passed this test too.

The next problem we have is that Aleksander is a controlling person. He wants to have the upper hand on things like ruling, taking military decisions etc. In the beginning, I imagine her taking her with him wherever he would go. Both because he would want to keep her close and out of his desire to teach her things. Like "Look how I'm handling things. Look what needs to be done. Observe and learn". Because I kinda doubt he would ever find a Sun Summoner all ready and knowledgeable about matters of the state like he is.

That's why trust is important for him. Because he would have to make sure that she can be counted on for important things and she wouldn't turn against him or usurp him.

I don't believe that in the beginning he would let her take full control of the kingdom or even an equal stand with him, but! If he saw her ready to fight and take part in wars he would take her with him in the battlefield and, in time after seeing her getting stronger and stronger, he would let her go by herself. Like "We've got a situation on the northern borders. Take one hundred men with you, finish them off and come back." And that's because it would be impossible for him to be everywhere at once. He couldn't be both in the battlefield with the Sun Summoner AND stay on the throne and deal with other, ruling matters. Sooner or later they would have to split and he would be forced to let her go and let her do something by herself. It's inevitable and Aleksander would know that. Sometimes they would need to share the responsibilities. Sometimes Aleksander would have to go to Fjerda to deal with some drüskelle while his Sun Summoner would have to stay in Os Alta because an important meeting with some Kerch ambassadors must take place and other things like that.

Now, about the ruling matter. Yes, he would make her his Queen but for how much liberty and freedom he would allow her to have in making decisions by herself is a debatable matter in this fandom.

Here's my own opinion of it:

In the beginning, if she would try to make a decision by herself, he wouldn't like it. Because he's not used to have others take major decisions (having the King rule him in S&B doesn't count here because in that occasion Aleksander had no other option but to obey him). So, in the first years, it would be kinda difficult for him to get used to it. He would probably not let her decisions be put into action. Like "don't overreach yourself, okay. I'm in charge here".

But! (and this is important)

I don't find Aleksander to be that kind of person who gets crazy feral if his Queen disagrees with a decision of his. If his Sun Summoner spoke reasonably about her disagreement, if she was calm and logical with her own reasons of why she finds his verdict wrong, he would listen to her.

Alina in R&R had said to him that "We would be equals until I disagreed with you. Then you would do to me what you did to Genya."

I disagree. I don't see him that way. Just like I said, if her own argument is spoken in a calm, reasonable manner and in a respectable, honest way, he would actually listen to her. He wouldn't be "OH MY GOD YOU ARGUE AGAINST ME!! DUNGEONS NOW!!"

It's all about the way she'll say it and what is the reason of their argument.

With Alina it was different because she spoke out against him for a matter of high importance: his fight against the Grisha persecution and, of course, Alina's character didn't know shit about politics, wars and what needed to be done.

So, in conclusion, in matters of warfare he would allow her to go by herself if he deemed her powerful and capable to go by herself without getting killed or captured easily and having the right knowledge in fights and strategy.

And in matter of ruling, it would be strange for him if she started and taking decisions by herself from the first week and he probably wouldn't like it. But as the years would go by, I think that not only he would allow her to have a saying but also he would ask for her advice (YES YOU HEARD ME RIGHT).

(oh and about your question if he would allow her to become a soldier: yes. Mainly because all Grisha become soldiers and the Darkling is a man that believes in having fighting skills. Let's not forget how he was teaching Grisha to learn hand-in-hand combat apart from developing their Grisha powers. Plus, I don't imagine him wanting someone that sits on the couch everyday. As much as he would fear for her life sometimes, he would want her to be a fighter)

[silverzoomies]

It's not really a question, but an idea popped into my head, I watched Days of Future Past recently, imagine a student from the future, for some reason (a power I don't know) manages to go back in time and become best friends with her favorite teacher when he was younger (Peter obviously!) I don't know if anything can come out of this, but in my head the idea was brilliant lol 😝

I’ve been meaning to respond to this ask !! I thought it was absolutely delightful !!

Days of Future Past is so cozy to me. There’s just something about the way the time period is presented - with all those lovable characters - that makes it feel so genuine and fun. I’m a goofball with a childlike imagination. Nothing is more comforting to me than imagining being there tbh. As silly as it sounds.

This concept absolutely warms my heart, since it fulfills that silly dream.

Anyway, I have some thoughts under the cut !!

Peter Maximoff headcanons - Student reader goes back in time and meets their favorite, speedster teacher in his teen years!

We know Peter eventually becomes a teacher in canon. I’m not really sure what he teaches, since they never really clarified. But there’s no doubt in my mind he’d be great at his job.

Mr. Maximoff is definitely a more laid back kinda teacher

I do imagine he’s the type to playfully mess with any students who act out of line. I’ve had teachers like that before in the past. The ones who take no shit and lightheartedly tease students. That’s absolutely on brand for Peter

I also get the vibe he’d be so “how do you do fellow kids” about everything

And the students would think he’s cool anyway. I mean, he’s fast. He loves cool music - and probably some really cool movies/shows/games too!

I imagine he’d deck out his classroom/office in all kinds of pop culture memorabilia. Very similar to the way he decorated his basement back when he lived at his mom's

Reader as a mutant student would be no different than the other kids. Y’all know you’d think he was the coolest teacher there ever was. Some of you might even look up to him! And maybe also develop a harmless crush. He is handsome, after all.

Imagine your surprise - after you’ve gone back in time for mission with some of the X-Men. It’s part of your training. You never thought you’d get the chance to time travel, of all things. Or, if we're following DoFP canon; maybe you went back in time with Logan? You're one of the last surviving mutants, and your mutation is useful somehow. It could go either way!

But Mr. Maximoff is there in the past. Only, he’s seventeen, acting on impulse, and being a playful nuisance.

He thinks you’re weird as hell. You totally bizarre, future kid. But you’re also pretty alright...since you think he's so cool 'n all. Most people just think he's a freak. And hey, you're a mutant like him! He doesn't know a lot of mutants yet!

And how the heck are you from the future - but you somehow know all the bands he likes, the movies he’s into, the shows he watches, even the games he plays??

Spoiler alert - it’s because Mr. Maximoff has a tendency to show off all his favorite things in class. Dude can’t go a single day without referencing Galaga, or Star Wars, or David Bowie, or whatever else

If you’re allowed to disclose any info about the future, you’ll probably tell him he gets a teaching job. Not only that, but the kids all love him

To which he responds with a - tsh, yeah. Right.

Why would he ever become a teacher?? He hates school! He can’t ever focus in class! His grades are the worst, and he bombs every test! C’mon…no way! What’re you tryin’ to pull his leg???

Y-You’re pulling his leg, right?

It’d be dope if you got the chance to hang out with him for a little bit. You could follow him around while he got into his usual, kleptomaniac shenanigans

Y’all would definitely cause enough trouble to get the cops called on you

Actually, when you find out the local cops know his name by heart - you can't help but do a double take

Mr. Maximoff? The coolest teacher in Westchester? The dude who’s always doggin’ on students for running in the halls? He used to be a lawless rulebreaker? Holy shit!! You almost couldn't wait to return to the future, just to poke fun at him for bein' such a troublemaker in his youth

Honestly, there’s a lot of really fun ideas one could pull from this, anon. I can’t even do it justice. I’d love if anyone else wanted to add their take. My brain has been so broken lately. But thank you for your ask!! I love you dearly!!

[themoodyestj]

hello "new person" assuming you aren't yet another sock account created by walker girl because she's bored and doesn't have any friends.

for someone who claims to have a brain, you sure bought a lot of the bs walker girl admittedly made up.

just open your eyes, if you really have a brain then use it and realize that hating on Jensen is a futile waste of time.

because he doesn't even know you exist, and everyone else is busy with their own lives.

there's no point to this, you can't help him, or hurt him, and even if you do this just for funsies, because you like to trigger people.

i guarantee, no one gets their day ruined over a stupid post on tumblr, i doubt anyone even thinks about it for more than 5 minutes tops.

so why don't you find something better to do with with your life?

i promise Jensen will be fine he's a grown adult, and he can solve his own problems just fine.

Oh my, my first hate mail. :D I was actually wondering why the AAs were so quiet while raging on in other platforms, and then I noticed my anon asks were off. They're bold with their words but not with their nicknames, am i right? But lets get to business, shall we? hello "new person" assuming you aren't yet another sock account created by walker girl because she's bored and doesn't have any friends. Oh, I take offense to that, delulu person. I am indeed a new person. Or... well, not that new, just started speaking up a bit more recently. I dont intend to prove anything to you, I dont give a rats ass about what you think, really, and im sure it would help your delusion to think that Im someone's double account, but I am not. Fairy Godmother turned me into a real girl, I swear. for someone who claims to have a brain, you sure bought a lot of the bs walker girl admittedly made up. Oh I do have a brain! It's not a claim, it's a fact! My mom got me tested! (Sorry, had to insert a Big Bang Theory joke here) And no, walkergirl is one of the people I read, but not the only one. Many many others share similar opinions, including people in your circle (except you club them to death like baby seals, you big bullies). Also, I have eyes. I can read. I can think. And if you dont mind me saying... dude, strong projection. Im not the one being fed up lies from the media despite a lot indicating the contrary. And I guess it's annoying to you that a lot of people start to to think the same... Fear us, because we are many. Muahahahahah (Not scared yet? Ah well.) just open your eyes, if you really have a brain then use it and realize that hating on Jensen is a futile waste of time. Ok. Read my characters. I DONT HATE JENSEN. I actually love him. And thats why i want to see him grow and be happy. I can love someone and have critical thinking. Imagine what would happen if you raised a child, which is the most love you can feel for someone, and only praise him? Youd get a Duhneel, and honey, no one wants that. One is enough, dear lord!

Besides, you don't get to tell me who I hate or not, delulu person, stop trying to force your opinion on me. Geez. because he doesn't even know you exist, and everyone else is busy with their own lives. Oh I saw that. I saw how people were getting busy with their lives, in fact, I was sent screenshot after screenshot of how people were busy living their lives. In fact, I know you didnt write this message, its your secretary, because youre busy with your life, right? You old geezers, stop trying to pull my leg like that! (LOL) It would be funny if it wasnt so tragic how one simple post from a small blog can rile you all up like that. But golly, am i happy you guys have a life to live! Go live it! there's no point to this, you can't help him, or hurt him, and even if you do this just for funsies, because you like to trigger people. Well, I do it to express my opinion, thats my point, and it so happens to trigger some very sensitive people. Although I dont go shove my truth in their faces, like you are, Im simply... expressing an opinion. Im sure the concept is familiar to you. But if I were trying to trigger anyone... You'd be playing right into my game, wouldnt you? Mindblowing, right? Maybe a teachable moment right there, just saying. i guarantee, no one gets their day ruined over a stupid post on tumblr, i doubt anyone even thinks about it for more than 5 minutes tops. Yeah, we've been over that. Im so happy my post didnt cause any imposition and people were able to live their merry lives without causing much of a fuss. And im grateful you gave me your five minutes of thinking about my post. Thank you for the attention. so why don't you find something better to do with with your life? Because... I dont want to and youre not the boss of me, neiner neiner? But hey, dont lose hope on me so fast, I do plenty of things! Do you want me to share some recipes of food I cooked for the first time this evening so you can use in your life when youre not thinking about me? I could share some! i promise Jensen will be fine he's a grown adult, and he can solve his own problems just fine. Oh, thank you for the reassurance, I was getting so worried about him! Im sure he is in great company, with you people salivating over him. He wont get dehydrated, thats for sure! Now on a more serious note... I really dont know what you expected with this message. To rile me up? To play with my insecurities? For idiotic messages, idiotic answers. You get it as you dish it. May this be a lesson. The thing is, as much as I love Jensen, I will never be so invested in him as you and your delulu friends are, because i keep a healthy mental stance when it comes to celebrities. So I would advise you to really follow your own advice and live your life, and live it well. Don't let my post ruin your day, its just words. And like you said, Jensen doesnt give a crap about any of us, so what would be the point, right? Tumblr is not my life, this is a place where i spend some time, but it doesnt really define me. If you check my blog... you wont find much there. Im not as proliferous as most bloggers, but hey, you sure gave me a run for my money this weekend! Ok, this was fun. See you never.

[gofancyninjaworld]

OPM Manga Update 229 Review:

No reason for this image, just me enjoying Saitama's meaty thighs. That's all.

Story: Like putting lipstick on a hyena

We open with Tatsumaki taking a phone call. She's dismissive of the idea of shooting a commercial to promote the Hero Association to prospective heroes -- until she remembers Saitama talking about how he'd once been weak and agrees. Let it be noted that Tatsumaki doesn't do anything half-assed: she throws herself into the role of ambassador with such enthusiasm that she ends up trashing the studio.

She is less than impressed with what comes out of the session: a cutesy, saccharine call girl simpering in a commercial, about as true a reflection of Tatsumaki as lipstick and a pink bowtie on a spotted hyena. Fubuki, unfortunately, comes home [1] just as Tatsumaki gets hung up on. Oh, dear, there goes the roof. Looks like they'll be staying in hotels for a bit -- ar at Hero Association HQ -- while the damage is fixed.

More goings on under the cut.

I'd love to blame Amai Mask for producing the AI-edited monstrosity. But the true blame lies with McCoy. He orchestrated the campaign. The public lap it up, it conforming to an image that's palatable to see [I have A LOT to say about this but that's another post.]

Nastier-minded people would have asked, 'which organization', but so it goes when one has the benefit of the doubt

After the HA executives praise McCoy for his adroit management of the HA's image, they (especially a guy I'm calling Walrus 'stache) turn to the recruitment figures to find...

...ah, let me wind back a second. It's true that the Hero Association is always recruiting, but it's taken on additional urgency with Metal Knight having apparently thrown billions of Yen away on infrastructure and weaponry that don't work [2] and Tatsumaki being unmanageable. We return to the story...

...that...

...the ad campaign had made no difference. The Hero Association approval ratings were up, but recruitment was still on its downward slide.

What gave?

The answer comes from two other conversations happening contemporaneously. One is between a Hero Association scout and Axel, the leader of a vigilante group known as The Hunters, the other between another scout and a super-sumo champion named Raiden. In each case, the scout is sent off with a flea in their ear as the prospect in question has another engagement.

Yes, there's another hero organization in the wings, and it's hoovering up as much talent as it can find. It's even reaching out to current heroes.

We cut to a very dapper-looking Genos being asked by a very tired-looking Dr Kuseno what his intentions are, given this information and the former's feelings about the Hero Association. Genos starts to answer, but we'll have to wait for the answer as the scene switches to Saitama doing a spit-take as he sees the commercial.

Meta: Finally, some good fucking food

Everything can be faked (except truth)

Many people have already noted the jab at AI fakery inherent in 'Tatsumaki's ad,' so I won't belabour the point. I shall leave it to another post.

Alas, heroes don't grow on trees

The Hero Association's newfound desperation to find new heroes has been a long time coming. People who make good heroes are rare critters. There is not only the need for exceptional ability (even C-Class heroes are incredible), but there's also a need for willingness to serve as a hero, moral principles, and stability under very trying circumstances. Fooled by the previously buoyant numbers of applicants, leading to 55 Hero Tests being conducted as of the time Saitama and Genos applied, they've applied an 'easy-come, easy-goes' attitude to their recruits. When they should instead have recognised them as rare talent to be nurtured, even the lower-class heroes. Looks like there have been seven more Hero Tests since those two joined, and the news has not been good.

At no point does the HA appear to have had more than 600 heroes on the books: retention seems to have been a big problem. It fits in well with the executive Gobrich's frustration with the situation that support for heroes is too top-down and hasn't listened to their actual needs and concerns. Bushohige (the Bearded Worker) has made similar points -- but no one's listening to him, either!

Sekingar at least appears to have seen the light in this regard and at least appreciates that heroes, whatever their abilities, need to be used *well* rather than be treated as a disappointment for not being S-Class heroes. But he's just one person and has only recently been promoted.

And now... with the advent of actual competition, the spigot of fresh new bodies to take in and use up has largely dried up. What a to do!

Speaking of drying up

Genos is draining the very life out of Kuseno at the moment -- it reminds me of Uu and Reigen. Yes, the doctor made him a cyborg, and so on one level, he can't really complain if he's the it man when it comes to giving him upgrades. But Kuseno is all alone. The stress of worrying about Genos when the latter casually dumps horrors on him and the burden of designing upgrades (how do you God-proof a person, anyway?) is really getting to him. And he has no one to talk to, let well alone share the burden with. [3]

Try not to die of overwork, doctor! At least not before you can find Genos a new situation.

Asides

[1] Looks like Fubuki lives with Tatsumaki in the manga. Either that or she lives close by and has a key. Love to see it.

[2] Truly an eavesdropper hears no good of themselves. The manga change from Metal Knight being scolded in person to overhearing it is brilliant.

[3] In a kinder world, Kuseno would be able to call Bang to at least have a sympathetic ear (heh, and Bang had a personality transplant). Kind and ONE don't mix, at least when it comes to his fictional characters, so too bad.

[vickyvicarious]

"I trust you will forgive me, but I have much work to do in private this evening. You will, I hope, find all things as you wish." At the door he turned, and after a moment's pause said:— "Let me advise you, my dear young friend—nay, let me warn you with all seriousness, that should you leave these rooms you will not by any chance go to sleep in any other part of the castle. It is old, and has many memories, and there are bad dreams for those who sleep unwisely. Be warned! Should sleep now or ever overcome you, or be like to do, then haste to your own chamber or to these rooms, for your rest will then be safe. But if you be not careful in this respect, then"—He finished his speech in a gruesome way, for he motioned with his hands as if he were washing them. 

Two things here. Firstly: I can't help but notice another challenge in this warning from Dracula. It isn't linked to anything they've been talking about. It reminds me of him telling Jonathan that of course he won't want to go anywhere locked... not only in him telling Jonathan what he wants/should do, but also. Well, the next day Jonathan went around testing what doors were locked, and it drove him into a panic as he learned nearly all of them were. Looking back, it feels a lot like Dracula is baiting Jonathan there, specifically tempting him to want to investigate different doors so that he then learns just how badly off he actually is.

Without spoiling anything about what comes next, I think the fact that Dracula is once again specifically mentioning other areas of the castle and that Jonathan shouldn't sleep there lest his rest be unsafe... this is bait, too. He's poking at a caged animal, trying to make it move and do something interesting. He's testing Jonathan here again after defeating him once with the letters/order to stay longer. It's a win/win for him honestly; either Jonathan listens to him and proves that he is obedient to Dracula/scared into submission... or Jonathan resists by disobeying, in which case whatever danger he winds up in will be gratifying to Dracula in multiple ways. First that he gets to torment Jonathan even more, and secondly that he gets proved right and it reinforces that Jonathan should continue to listen to/obey him.

Dracula says here, 'hey. I'm going to leave you totally alone and unsupervised this evening. Don't do this.' It may well be a truthful warning, but I'm not so convinced it's wholly genuine. It could just as well be a gilded invitation to disobey - and experience the consequences.

Secondly:

Dracula is once again mentioning Jonathan's dreams, unprompted. This is I think the first time he warns him about bad dreams as opposed to telling him to 'dream well', but him showing an interest in Jonathan's sleep (both manipulating the time it happens as well as remarking on the quality of it) is a repeated element. I think it is especially interesting in the context of Jonathan's response later that night, after he sees Dracula lizard crawling down the castle wall:

I shall not fear to sleep in any place where he is not. I have placed the crucifix over the head of my bed—I imagine that my rest is thus freer from dreams; and there it shall remain.

Jonathan seems to make a direct link between Dracula->dreams. He doesn't specify bad dreams (or queer dreams, which may have been his way of saying nightmares), but he specifically says he isn't afraid to sleep where Dracula isn't, thus implying he's afraid to sleep where Dracula is. It's possible that there is an element here of Jonathan doubting his own mind, but I don't think that's the main thing going on here. Jonathan really does believe that his sleep is a time to be afraid. That makes sense: a sleeping person is naturally vulnerable, even beyond his weird only-partially-awake trip to the castle, and Dracula has at least once walked right into his room without asking permission (the mirror incident). All this reference to dreams makes me wonder if he hasn't been dreaming well since he arrived in the castle, too. He hasn't mentioned anything but there are some possible clues. On May 8, before the mirror, he says that "I only slept a few hours when I went to bed, and feeling that I could not sleep any more, got up."

This could be down to bad dreams, though we of course don't know since he doesn't tell us. But also, on May 5 there is all that weirdness during the caleche ride which I think might be down to Dracula influencing Jonathan to try and make him sleep at least somewhat (there's another post in my 'dracula dreams' tag about it), followed by Dracula telling him specifically that "to-morrow you shall sleep as late as you will. I have to be away till the afternoon; so sleep well and dream well!" Then the next day Jonathan did indeed sleep super late. Maybe it was just that he had permission and had been kept up all night, so he was exhausted and let himself sleep in. Maybe Dracula had some kind of magical influence there too. I dunno - either way Dracula does still successfully manipulate Jonathan's sleep, it's just a question of method. I do know for sure that there's a lot of emphasis on dreams and sleeping already.

And that Jonathan wants specifically to protect his sleep. He takes the crucifix and hangs it above his bed with the specific intention of protecting himself while asleep. Now, I don't know why he didn't just wear it around his neck while sleeping as well as while awake, but at the very least him putting it there shows both a belief in the crucifix's power to protect him at his most vulnerable... and a feeling that he needs that protection.

[speaker-of-the-void-cats]

Let me tell you a secret...

...lean in closer. No-thing is watching.

It is done. The magnum opus, my most delicate, intricate post|patch|work, everything I couldn't stop thinking about since Shadowkeep until this very moment. But now, I can't remember a time when I didn't know it deep inside. I've always wanted to create something beautiful that lasts, that makes an impact in the waves and touches the hearts of those who will listen. Make them beat harder, faster, better, stronger. Give them a ring of spears in which to grow. Something that harmonizes and shares how the tales and tunes of old and new have moved me, made me feel. Something from my heart that draws it's power from yours. But I couldn't even begin to imagine how. I was lost in the Deep. I had no voice; barely a whisper.

This is the way. This is how we find the words. The light of action and self-realized purpose in the darkness of suffocating, deterministic thought. Thus we are truly unveiled.

The post broke the tumblr text editor more times than I can count, but I had to make sure it resonated and so I poured my heart into this one. It's been an enormous struggle against limitations, doubt, and failure, but I hope I made it work. One last word of advice, it is best viewed on a tablet or anything that doesn't occlude your view.

Even if it's not the truth, I share this in hopes you can find some of your own shining|singing|echoing back at you from the dark. Forget about me entirely. The clockwork is waiting, it just needs the trigger mechanism. The spark. The fuel.

It just needs you.

Go deeper. Don't slip. Find the cord and hold on for dear life. Tune your strings. Crank it up to 11. Keep your one-and-only mind sharp and true. Go all out within and refract the radiance. I'm not trying to confuse you, but do feel free to let yourself become vexed. Sometimes there's just no other way to understand a thing than to say and do it, no matter how imperfectly. Be a fool, call me senselessly woken if you must. Call me mad, delusional, over the top|edge|precipice. You'll have to excuse my morbid excitement, but there's simply nothing sweeter in the darkness than harmony.

Sometimes plants wither, even with care, if the atmosphere is unfair and the soil goes to rot. But the greater sin is for those who are called to care for it to instead turn a blind eye, or worse, rage against it.

//

ACCESS: RESTRICTED

DECRYPTION KEY: 2CA9SXUO2C$IKO-006

REP#: 011-PSYCHOMETER-TEST

AGENT(S): TRU-135

SUBJ: PSYCHOMETER FIELD TESTS

1. The new version works. Love all the knobs and antenna; very analog. I took readings off a hatch control out here on Europa and Cowlick was able to retrieve badly distorted voices in some kind of distress. I don't know if it's doing exactly what you Warlocks want, but it's doing something all right. Cowlick says it's probably tapping into her scrutiny, if you permit that term in your ivory halls.

2. Now, I'm not much for gadgets, so I won't ask you how you rigged this thing. But I am one for gossip. Weren't we closing in on some kind of workable theory of exactly how our Ghosts resurrect us? One which was, if I am not mistaken, based on research by the Future War Cult? Did any of that work survive Lakshmi?

3. You know they did try to recruit me once. The Cult. Over a game of poker. Fifty-two cards in a deck don't seem like many, this hard-ass Titan told me. But there are 80 658 175 170 943 878 571 660 636 856 403 766 975 289 505 440 883 277 824 000 000 000 000 different possible shuffles of 52 cards. You could walk back and forth across the observable universe faster than you could count all those possible shuffles. A lot faster. That's life, she said, and she had daisies impaled on the spikes of her skull. Life is endless permutation. So many possibilities. But the rules are what matter. Who cares how the deck shuffles if you don't know the rules of the game? We play this game over and over. Life and death. Light and Dark. But the only way you learn the rules, the only way you're ever gonna get one of those Truces you're named for, is if you come inside. Come into the Cult. Come on in and see. But I didn't.

4.Another thing she told me is that you can play poker with just three cards and two players. Jack, Queen, King. Ante one, max bet one more. High card wins unless one player folds. And in this game, there are many strategies available to the first player, but very few to the second, who acts to exploit the choice made by the first. Many possibilities against few. Sounds like you'd rather be the first player, huh? But if both players play perfectly, that second player wins in the end. Mathematical inevitability. Ain't that something? But I said, your game's just a toy. It's just a contrivance. That's not life. Life isn't one player always exploiting and beating the other.

5. Anyway, back to testing. Might go back to Cocytus and aim this thing at the gate. See how wild it goes. If you never hear from us again, you know Truce and Cowlick finally found something too spooky.

MESSAGE ENDS

_If the Light forgets while the Darkness remembers, then why does a Ghost's power of determination let it access latent memories imprinted in the dead? That's paradoxical. That should be a property of Darkness. How can such fundamentally opposed forces do the same thing?

Am I as shallow as those Guardians arguing over power levels? Trying to force a simple binary upon a complex spectrum… ? The Drifter talks about "spectrums of Light"—powers his Ghost can access because of its modifications. Forcing the metaphor, I thought. Light is not light. It doesn't have frequencies or spectra.

But if we are all constrained by our internalized ontology, by our tacit understanding of how the world works… maybe the circumstances of extreme survival compelled the Drifter to explore a new ontology. Maybe his Ghost achieved a new way to think about the Light.

Keep your eye on the Conductor's baton

Get ready to sing of sorrow|forgiveness

It's all up to you

But dread not

For destiny awaits us

//SIGNAL TETHERED TO UNKNOWN SOURCE

VEXSIG:MSDUND12

Transmitting....

I leave you this now, when it is too early to act. Before you have the faculty to understand it's gravitas. You were offered the age you've fought to restore. Everything we've lost. You won't find it on this narcissist's station.

I will set it in front of you, finely crafted and tuned. You mistakenly label it hubris, and resist. As you know ...

Failure is a catalyst. It breeds invention.

I was only trying to change your mind. To help you see a better future. That exchange... Did not always end in your favor. It does not have to still.

You believe my ideology... virulent.

All right.

Know that I have bled across time, and under the skin of the cosmos. My knowledge became its fabric, filled it's vessels, through its minds.

Humanity is scattered, yet to see a collective. But in the infinite forest of this infinite network the Vex have created... There is only one answer.

A Golden Timeline. With a heavy cost.

Come. Drink your fill. Let me change your minds.

Choice is the ego, raging against the inevitable.

You may not see a choice, but I make my own fate.

Don't ever let anyone else tell your story for you.

I can only make you look. Perhaps, in time, you will see.

Bpm jmab dwqkma - dwqkma bpib bzctg uibbmz - vmdmz ittwe bpmuamtdma jm pmizl. Bpqa tmaawv qa ewzbp tmizvqvo ioiqv ivl ioiqv.

Nwzmdmz.

Gwcz dwqkm uwdma ia i epqaxmz, uczuczqvo qvaqlm tizomz eqvla. Wvtg bpm bzcabml nme kiv ijawzj epib qa vmkmaaizg. Eqam ivl atg ivl xmznmkb, gwcz qvabzckbqwva lzwx, tmidqvo vwbpqvo jcb bpm pizl aemmb zqum wn mvtqopbmvumvb. Bpm xibp qa amb. Gwcz dwqkm qa cvtmiapml.

The living and breathing Alternate Reality Game we play in our heads and hearts every single second makes us trip over our feet in real reality. Cut open both and find your rhythm within.

Secant Filaments

The nature of the secant is to intercept a curve, a role all human relationships likewise fill.

Better think to remember your compass and protractor. You're gonna need 'em both at one point or another.

In this treatise, I plan to revisit earlier mathematical theorems and revise them considering our new observations on the Light, the Darkness, and lifeforms imbued with those respective powers. But before I do so, I must preface it with a personal note. Despite high-minded assumptions, mathematics is not an intrinsic language of the universe. It is how we describe the portions of the universe that we can observe. While numbers can track the abstract and find pattern in chaos, they cannot account for fundamental aspects of reality such as compassion or justice. The existence of the Lucent Hive, and Hive Ghosts in particular, may expand our understanding of causality, but they themselves are not "new"—the only thing that is new is our awareness and observation of them. These Ghosts have already been living alongside us. They've traveled with us. Endured with us. What we see is the mushroom, the fruit of the fungus. The fungus itself is a vast mycorrhizal network of filaments growing and working unseen below the soil, often barely connected to the fruiting bodies we observe. Similarly, we have observed Ghosts—Hive Ghosts included—without understanding the nature of the unseen filaments that may guide us. In our eagerness to understand the universe, we must not assume our observations are complete, or objective. Otherwise, we blind ourselves to possibilities… like the possibility that an unnoticed faction among us may be one temptation away from betrayal. Or that what drives our creator is no more than the same base desire for survival that drives all living things. —On Secants, Introduction, Ophiuchus

It's okay to be puzzled. It's supposed to be a hard and winding road. But we'll figure it out eventually. You've just gotta remember; take it one fragment at a time.

I dive to understand.

You get all that?

Here at the end and beginning is a gift from me to you, originally from another lost to the waves. Save your background, if you wish, for they verily do inform who we are. Clothe yourself in truth every day. Remember your past, the forsaken and the fallen. Fight to preserve their memory and possibility, and in the light of their truths we will seek evolution beyond this imperfect stasis.

Like you and I and everything, this amalgamation and its seed are ever changing as the wind. Living documents. If you feel any pull here, any resonance—any at all—if you drift or come undone, simply return to this place and remember who we are. Remember why we fight. Let your doubts become questions, and the answers you seek will be found in the map of your heart. In darkness or in light, your destiny will inevitably find you. Be ready.

We are, always and forever, Guardians of all existence. How will you decide to walk that vermicular path? Be careful.

I need a break before the third act. See you starside, my family in love|war. Be brave.

—MG

[yaffles-world]

Can I pls request a Reigen x reader one shot in which Y/n finds out shes pregnant after having a one night stand with Reigen. She first told Serizawa about it but told him to keep it a secret but Serizawa accidentally spills it to Reigen when they were having a conversation. Reigen is shocked but also offended that he was not the first to know about it but Y/n tells him she just didnt want to make things awkward between them because theyre workmates and shes also scared of his reaction. Fluff and comfort plss

A/N: hey! Sorry about the wait. Thanks for being my first coherent request! I really enjoyed writing this and I hope you enjoy reading it. Also I hope you don't mind but I still used gender neutral pronouns because.. well... it didn't feel necessary to make it a fem reader, as the author is someone who can get pregnant and uses they/them. Whew been a long time since I've done an x reader lol. I hope I covered everything you requested!

Warnings: lots of fluffy comfort hehe, brief mention of abortion but it's conclusion is very ambigious (Reigen is pro choice basically)

Word count: 1.3k

Taglist: @irummna @zooterscooter

I tapped my foot obsessively on the ground. I pulled open my phone, double checking the calendar… we were careful. I caught Reigen looking at me over his computer and I felt red creep up onto my cheeks. It was just a one time thing. It was a silly mistake. A wonderful, but ultimately one off, event. We knew that going in…

He was still looking at me. I smiled weakly, and he raised his eyebrow.

"You alright, y/n?"

A one time thing. We knew that moving forward.

"I'm fine!" I said, my voice cracking slightly. Serizawa looked up from his desk, eyebrows furrowed. "Are you alright?" I asked Reigen, trying to deter further questions.

He paused. "I'm… Fine… thanks?"

I checked my phone again. There was no doubt about it… definitely late. I don't know why it hadn't clicked until today. I just happened to notice and now I have to stay here for… 6 hours before I can check.

I tapped my feet incessantly. At least stimming was very commonplace in this office. But Reigen kept looking at me… I even felt Serizawa staring at me.

I took a deep breath. Worrying isn't going to change anything. I tried to focus on the bookkeeping, but my eyes keep blurring with tears.

I pushed my chair out, suddenly. It made a harsh scraping noise against the floor.

"Excuse me, I'll be back in a second."

"Are you sure you're okay?" Serizawa said, moving to get up, but I waved my hands dismissively.

"I'm really fine."

"Tch, okay, don't be too long then," Reigen said.

I went down the stairs and down the road to the chemist. Luckily there was one easily within walking distance of the office… It was a cold day, the wind was bristly. I rubbed my arms as I fought off the cold. It stung at my eyes. I pushed open the chemist doors and there was a whoosh of hot air from inside. And a strong smell of old people.

I made a beeline for the pregnancy tests and pushed it onto the counter. It was deserted. I made no eye contact, and hurriedly paid, before pushing into the office.

Conveniently, at least, I suddenly got the urge to pee. I pushed open the door to the toilet for our office. In all other circumstances it being outside the main room was inconvenient, but I was thankful now for the privacy.

…

Now we wait… I always hated waiting. My hands were shaking. It was just a one off thing… it wasn't meant to have CONSEQUENCES.

Two lines.

Faint, but clear as day.

What. The. Fuck.

I couldn't begin to process. I felt my body slump forward, and I just sobbed. I can't tell him. But doesn't he deserve to know? He can't know. It will ruin everything. It will be so awkward, he's gonna hate me, I'm pregnant oh my god I'm pregnant with Reigen Arataka's baby, I can't do this, I can't tell him, I'm-

I heard a knock on the door. I gasped and tried desperately to hold back the sobs.

"Y/n? Is that you?" Serozawa spoke softly.

I sniffled.

I heard him sit down on the other side of the door.

"Listen, I know I'm not the most put together person but I care about you. I'm a good listener I promise."

I shuffled over to the door and sat with my back against it.

"Do you wanna talk about it? I've been told I give great hugs."

I giggled slightly then sighed. "I think I'm pregnant."

He was silent for a long time.

"Oh. Right…"

"Yeah. I just took a test."

"Do you know who the father is?"

"Regrettably, yeah… It's Reigen."

"Oh. Well… I'm sure he'll be supportive. He can come off a bit… you know… sometimes, but, as you know, he's a great guy and he's good with kids so-"

"He can't know." I said suddenly, surprising myself. Serizawa went silent again. "At least not yet…"

"Okay. Well. It's gonna be okay. I promise."

I laughed. "I don't believe you."

"Try hugging me first." Serizawa said, and I stood up slowly. I opened the door, and he stood up. I basically fell into his arms. He wrapped his arms around me tight, and held my head with his hand, holding me close. He smelt like fresh laundry detergent, and he was unbelievably warm.

"You're right, you give great hugs." I squished my face into his chest. Maybe it was gonna be okay.

"Hey, what are you two doing?! I pay you to work!" Reigen said, walking out of the office to see where his two best employees had gone.

"Sorry boss. I just heard y/n crying so I came to check on them."

"Oh," Reigen's expression softened, as he looked at me. He went to reach out, but then shoved his hands in his pockets awkwardly. "What's wrong?"

"Oh nothing. Just that time of the month." I winced.

"Right… we could go for drinks later if you like? Cheer you up?"

"Um, maybe that's not the best idea." Serizawa said. I glared at him. Reigen looked at him confused, as panic started to set into his face and he stood like a deer in the headlights.

"What do you mean?"

Serizawa stammered. "Well, um, uhhh, your a lightweight?"

Reigen blinked slowly. "That's never changed anything. What's wrong? I'm not leaving until this is resolved. That's the boss's job." He waved his hands emphatically.

I looked desperately at Serizawa. I was sweating bullets and so was he. God damn it. I couldn't think of anything to say.

Reigen tapped his foot and waved his hands again. "Well? I'm waiting!"

"Y/n is pregnant!"

"What?!" Reigen and I both exclaimed loudly, staring incredulous at Serizawa.

Serizawa looked like he was about to cry. "I'm so sorry I was scared and it had to come out eventually but I'm still so so sorry-"

I sighed and wrapped my arm around a crying Serizawa as Reigen stared at me. I couldn't read his expression. He looked shocked but I couldn't tell beyond that. I gave Serizawa a hug. "Do you mind giving us a minute?"

He nodded and slunk back into the office.

Reigen stood there. Blinking. Expressionless.

"You're pregnant."

I wrung out my hands. "Well, it's too early to really tell, but the urine test was positive and I'm late for my period."

"It's mine."

"Mhm." I almost tore off my skin with how quick I was rubbing my hands together. Reigen silently reached out and took my hands, still staring into the distance.

"Why didn't you tell me?"

"I only found out 5 minutes ago."

"Serizawa said 'it was gonna come out eventually'. You were planning on keeping my child a secret?"

Oh boy.

"No, of course not, I just wanted some time. At least confirm it with a doctor. I didn'twant to make things awkward... I'm sorry. I was scared."

Reigen nodded slowly, still staring into the distance, before shrugging. "I suppose that makes sense…"

I nodded.

We stood in silence for what felt like hours. The buzz of the radiator is the only noise.

"What now…?"

Reigen took a deep breath. "I care about you deeply."

I blushed despite the cold.

"Whatever our relationship is, I want to be involved, and I want to help you." He squeezed my hands and finally made eye contact. "We're in this together. If you want to be."

"I do want to be…" I mumbled.

He pulled me in close for a hug. He was colder than Serizawa, and smaller, but he held on tighter. He held on like he was scared to let go.

"I want you to know I support you no matter what choice you take. Including a safe abortion, or putting it up for adoption. We're in this together, but it's your body, and it's up to you."

I squeezed him in tight, burying my nose in his neck.

"Now… How about we take the rest of the day off, hey?" He said, rubbing my shoulder. "Go drink some lemonade and talk about this."

I nodded. "I'd like that."

[lavenoon]

Since I can't read yet I come here with a question instead! (And if this wasn't already planned and won't spoil anything, of course). Because I'm an absolute sap, how does the first kisses happen with each of the boys?

So, the truth is, nope no kisses were planned - because while I am absolutely a hopeless romantic, I often forget there's a part after the mutual pining. Whoops!

But our idiot trio... They grow closer and don't even really notice. Like walking a mile and just thinking about each individual step, then looking back and going "Oh"

The reveal is a midpoint for that - they grew as close as they could for the roles they occupy in each other's life, and afterwards have that relationship as solid base to build even more on top of it.

Now for the actual kisses?

It's Y/N who takes initiative in both cases - the boys are a little more aware of how down bad they are, desperately trying to flirt while a lot of it either flies over Y/N's head or they interpret it as "normal" behavior (which it is, but still, way to miss the point, dear). So the little bird is the one who has to have their "Oh." moment!

I think. Well, this is me, and on the fly adaptations are the norm, so yes.

This realization comes late (because I am a whore for mutual pining, even though it's not quite self-aware in Y/N's case), after HQ finds out that they know each other's identities.

In the end, our dear star agents are let off the hook easy, due to some combination of "Well, we kind of knew this was going to happen sooner rather than later, our mistake to not separate you immediately", Dawn being a convincing bastard along the lines of "Knowing each other's identities can be quite the advantage, actually. We can join each other's long-term missions without any risk to our civilian identity, and you know how effective we are in the field", and also some bit of plot armor, I suppose (lmao)

But I've mentioned it before - they get one "test" mission to see just how efficient their trio is, and if it's worth looking past the (unintentional) breaking of rules). I still kind of want this to happen on a cruise? For Reasons(TM)

Robin poses as a high-standing trust fund kid, a role they despise but which explains both the need for a bodyguard and why no one has actually seen them before when they introduce themself. They play the role decently well by simply channeling their snappy attitude they used to show towards Dusk back in the day (and of course, still sometimes do, but much much more affectionate these days)

Dawn is the daytime bodyguard, mostly present for the afternoon meetings and keeping Robin from just. Mauling the sleazy business people they're forced to mingle with. They get flustered more than enough, still more used to the nice neighbor, so to be out of their comfort zone within the mission and then kept off balance by their way too smooth rival/ bodyguard?

It gets worse when they just feel that twitch in their fingers, watching as illicit deals go through, and they can't do anything yet. Sun makes sure to hold them back, a firm but gentle hand on their shoulder before he takes their hand to brush over their tensed knuckles. Signals them that yes, he saw, too - and it'll be okay. They'll take care of it together as soon as they can, and there's absolutely no doubt about that in his mind. The confidence is infectious, and Robin has a small moment of realization just how much they trust and understand Sun, and how much more they want to learn - they couldn't imagine a life without him long before already, but this makes them aware of that terrible need for more, still. All this condensed in the short thought "God, I want to kiss him."

They need to process that.

Unfortunately, Dusk doesn't help. Smug as always, he's their escort for any of the evening activities, more focused on the social aspect and having fun. Some dances, smarmy cocktail parties, plays - you name it, there's something going on, and for the sake of information Robin has to attend as much as possible.

They try to interact with everyone else, but truly just cannot stand these people, and are too unused to playing nice. They regularly tap out, and just go back to their bodyguard - scary guy, really, don't they mind? "Not at all, he's a sweetheart! (:" *cut to Moon standing near the wall, glowering with thermal vision and sharp teeth, arms crossed to hide the twitching fingers* "... Right." But they go back, and notice that it's reassuring for them both. They drag him onto the dance floor at some point, missing steps and dancing out of tune, because they just get so caught up in their usual banter. One comment just nearly breaks them, and they fear they're threatening to burst their cover with how loudly they want to laugh. If only they could shut him up with a kiss -

Wait.

Again?

And thus the crisis begins. They bide their time for a day or two, just processing that yes, they're in love with their - their.

Their everything sounds so incredibly cheesy - but they are, aren't they? Neighbors, rivals, friends - they touch each other's life on all accounts.

Theirs, they settle on. That's what they want the boys to be, anyway.

They don't know when it started - they just look back, and it looks like this was always the way things would have gone. Of course they ended up here - every step only took them closer to this point.

It's time for the next one, then.

Turns out they're just a bit of a romantic sap, and they look for "good" moments. Fortunately for them, I am also a romantic sap, and will god mod their universe to fit my cheesy needs.

They get Dawn first. They have a moment to themselves, after a long afternoon of boring meetings, and Robin stays behind in the room for a moment to breathe. Dawn waits near the entrance, glaring at a few people that just carelessly shoulder check him. Lets out a noise of disgruntlement, then crosses the room to check on Robin. They assure him they're fine, they just need a moment without this stuffy atmosphere. They glance up at him - and the amount of brain cells that activate in that moment is unheard of for them.

Perfect opportunity. "Lean down", they ask him. "Your tie's messed up. Let me fix it?" And Dawn - well, he's positively surprised for sure, that's a bold step for his little thief! So he is not complaining! He obliges, so so happy and confident that they finally started making some advances! He does not expect that they are about to just skip a couple steps entirely. Tug him down by his tie, the other hand settling on his shoulder, but the kiss itself is surprisingly delicate after the startling force to get him there. They pull back after a moment, trying to assess - and Dawn is just completely stunned. Well. They were pretty sure, but... "I didn't misunderstand, right?"

That's when Dawn snaps back to reality, and just cups their face with both hands, widest grin on his face before he mimics that first kiss again and again. But it's too passive for him, and they got their human kisses, so now he's adding a good nuzzle into the mix, all while Robin starts giggling. He's a little eager, after months of pining - so the two of them may stumble into the chairs and desk behind them. The noise does startle them out of their little moment, but then Robin looks at him, and just entirely deadpan says "Don't tell Dusk. I'm going to get him."

Dawn loses it, which is saying something, and they join in immediately after. He does promise to not snitch, though.

They don't have to wait long. Another on deck cocktail party, and they end up staying late long after the staff cleaned up the last of the drinks and snacks. The night sky out at sea - that's a view even Dusk will let them stay up for. They just lean on the railing, listen to the waves crash against the ship, and crane up their necks to look at the stars. After a while Robin does feel that, so they crack it. Dusk, very much interpreting that as "that sounded bad", just immediately looks down to check on them. They blink, surprised, when he's all worried with his hands near their neck, just fluttering and checking for an injury that isn't there. Yup, they think. This idiot gets it, and now. So they cup his face, resulting in a surprised little jolt when he locks eyes with them. Idiots already getting kissed. A little more insistently than Dawn, perhaps, but also over just as quick. They pull back again, look at his stunned expression, and grin. "Yup, been wanting to do that for a while."

Dusk... Appalled. Offended. Insulted to the core. He grabs them by the lapels of their suit, dragging them forward, and just shakes them (gently). "Then why did you wait this long?" And they're just holding onto his wrists and giggling, going "But this was perfect!" "I'll give you perfect -" "Like right now?" "Right -" And he blinks at them, and yeah, actually - like right now. Some of the remaining staff do remind them they aren't alone at some point. They just kind of slink back to their room then - giggling to each other like the fools they are.

They do kind of agree to leave any further new PDA for after they return home, and somehow the pining becomes much more bearable with the thought that it's only a few more days. There's a date - and then they'll discuss going on one <3

[ellie-andthemachine]

The Rookie: Echoes of the Past (Chapter Two) Synopsis: From oldest rookie to T.O., John Nolan takes on training the newest rookie, Officer Ellie Moore. In her first 6 months on the force, an unresolved case catches up to her, putting her survival to the ultimate test. A tale of mentorship, resilience, and facing one's demons head-on.

Read Chapter One here: Chapter ONE

“Hey, I’ll take the wheel for the first half of the shift if you’d like,” Lucy offered.

“You’re the boss, go for it,” Aaron chuckled.

Lucy started the vehicle and pulled away from the station, heading out onto the busy streets of L.A.

“7-Adam-07, show us on patrol,” Thorsen radioed in.

“So, you and Nat are going on another date, then?” Lucy asked, curious. “You said that you two hit it off really well.”

“Oh yeah, next weekend. It’s crazy; she knows all about me and doesn't even have an issue with any of it.”

“Well, why should she? You proved your innocence in more ways than one, especially with the documentary. You're a really stand-up guy.”

“Thanks, Luce,” Aaron said. “She knows the money I come from, and she doesn't care. It’s like nothing bothers her about it.”

“That’s Nat for sure: down to earth, humble, and super sweet.” Lucy smiled, “I’m so glad that you two hit it off well. Just FYI, I want an invite to the wedding.”

Aaron laughed, “Hell, you’ll probably be in the damn wedding. Matron or Maid of Honor and all that shit.”

“I wouldn’t say no. She’s an amazing friend and deserves to be happy, and maybe that’ll be with you. Who knows?”

“I hope you’re right. I’m ready for a lifetime of happiness; that’s for damn sure.”

The two rode in comfortable silence, with dispatch radioing other units in the background.

"Hey, can I ask you something?" Lucy asked.

"Sure, what’s up?"

"Have you noticed anything going on with Ellie? You two talk sometimes."

"All I know is that she’s been having some trouble sleeping. I mentioned how tired she looked the other day after the shift. Apparently, she deals with insomnia a few times a year; she says it's nothing she isn't used to."

"Do you think it's enough to affect her work?"

Aaron looked over at Lucy. "No, I don't. Why? Are you concerned that it might?"

Lucy sighed. "Not overly, no. I do worry about her. However, at the same time, I want to make sure it doesn't impact her while she's on patrol. We have to leave our personal issues at the door when we come in, no matter how difficult it is."

Aaron nodded. "Yeah, you're right. Hell, I'm sure every single one of us understands the danger it poses if we don't."

"Exactly. Look, if she talks to you—which I doubt she will, because Lord knows she barely opens up to us girls—but if she does, could you keep me in the loop?"

"Of course. Though I'm pretty sure you have nothing to worry about. She seems levelheaded enough."

"You know as well as I do that things can always change."

"True."

Lucy and Aaron pulled into the circular driveway of their alarm call.

“This is 7-Adam-07, dispatch, show us on scene,” Aaron radioed in. “False alarm, dead body, or burglary? Where’s your bet?”

“It's super quiet. I don't think it's a false alarm; we would've gotten a call from the owner. The owner may not be home, which leads to a possible burglary.”

“...or he could be dead and burgled.”

“Yeah, let’s not take any chances,” Lucy said, leading the way to the front door of the home. “Uh, Aaron, I’d say your bet is the closest; look,” she pointed to the steps, motioning to the blood droplets.

“Blood and the front door ajar. I’ll take back?”

“Yeah, radio if you find anything.”

“You too.” Aaron said as he unholstered his weapon and headed towards the rear of the home.

“7-Adam-07, our alarm call has turned into a suspected homicide and burglary. Standby.” Lucy radioed into dispatch and removed her weapon as well. Pushing the front door open, she called out, “LAPD!” Hoping for some kind of response, she received none.

Going room by room, she quickly but effectively clears them, noting nothing out of the ordinary in any. Upon coming to the bottom of the stairway moments later, she notices smeared blood on the wooden handrail. “Thorsen, I cleared the downstairs. There’s blood on the handrail. I’m heading up. What’s your status?”

“Clear. No sign of any forced entry. Nothing out here to indicate that anything happened. I’m heading around front to come in. Be careful.”

Lucy starts heading upstairs, her gun raised, ready for any altercations. “LAPD, is anyone up here?” She calls out once more. She receives no response again.

The first room she comes to is a bathroom. Nothing out of the ordinary. The next room is a guest room. Same. The third room’s door is ajar. She notices blood droplets on the white carpet, blood on the doorframe and knob.

Pushing the bedroom door open, she’s greeted with the sight of what she guesses is the homeowner—deceased. Lucy checks for a pulse and finds none. Sighing, she notices a closet and the master bathroom, and works carefully to clear the interior rooms.

“Chen, where are you at?” Aaron calls, entering through the front door.

“Upstairs, master bedroom on the left,” Lucy yells out. “I cleared the other rooms up here. I think I found the owner.”

Aaron quickly makes his way upstairs, heading for Lucy. “Aw, what the hell is that?”

“I’m going to guess our homeowner,” she says as she pulls out her radio. “This is 7-Adam-07, dispatch, notify detectives that our alarm call is a homicide.”

“7-Adam-07, copy.”

“Luce, look. There’s a message carved on his chest,” Aaron points out to Lucy.

Lucy walks over to the body of the homeowner and notices the bloody message that he has pointed out.

“'GiVe Me MOre,'” she reads aloud. “Give who more, and give them more of what?”

Aaron and Lucy look at each other, both curious and concerned.

"Victim’s name is Anton Yelkavich. Age 34. Has ties to Sureno 13," Lopez said, informing Chen and Thorsen. The scene was busy with crime scene techs.

"Sureno 13?" Lucy asked.

"Local gang. I noticed the number 13 burned into our victim’s flesh, back of his leg," Aaron said. "They’ve only been around for like, I dunno, 5 years?" he explained. "Any idea who’d want him dead?" he asked Angela.

"I’m guessing any of the other members of the gang, maybe even their leader, Victor Martin. We busted Anton months ago, and he flipped on the leader. Word has it Anton was going to get the others to also flip on Victor."

"So, you think that the others might also be in danger?"

"Possibly. We’ll have to check the list on the others and follow up with them. Are you guys able to help with that?"

"Of course," Aaron spoke up. "Hey, the message that was carved into Yelkavich, any idea what it means?"

"No. It doesn’t ring a bell. Maybe combing through the file might help some," Lopez said.

“We’ll meet you back at the station and split up the names,” Lucy said.

“Sounds good. See you two then.”

Aaron and Lucy stepped back over to the other side of the yellow caution tape. “You think we’ll have more victims before the day is over?” Aaron asked.

Lucy sighed. “I do. That’s why we need to get that list of names and act fast. I just can’t figure out the message he left. He wants more. More of what, exactly?”

“You know as much as I do. Are you still driving?”

“You can, if you’d like.”

“Sure thing, let’s go.”

“7-Adam-07, show us returning to the station,” Lucy radioed in.

“7-Adam-07, copy.”

Nolan and Ellie arrived at the location of their domestic dispute call. The home was small and quaint, nestled in a nice neighborhood. It was surrounded by a white picket fence with a small open gate, giving it a clean and tidy appearance.

“Nice neighborhood. What do you think the dispute is about? Burnt cookies? Cold dinner? Warm beer?” Ellie scoffed, a hint of cynicism in her voice.

Nolan raised an eyebrow, looking at her. “Nice neighborhoods turn you off, boot?” he teased.

Ellie rolled her eyes at the nickname. “Oh, come on. You can’t tell me that the nice white picket fence isn’t just a façade for what really goes on behind closed doors? It’s all a lie.”

“Well, until this call is settled, let’s just do our jobs,” Nolan replied, his tone more serious.

“Yes, sir,” Ellie said quietly, falling in step behind her training officer as they ascended the porch steps. She took the lead and knocked on the door. “LAPD!”

Waiting to see if anybody would answer the door and let them in, Ellie could hear signs of an altercation inside. “I hear yelling. Should I try again or go in?”

“Let’s try one more time,�� Nolan decided, knocking on the door once more. “LAPD, open up!”

Still no response.

Then, a sound of breaking glass came from inside the house.

“Alright, go,” Nolan ordered, giving Ellie the green light to take action.

Ellie unholstered her weapon and turned the knob, her heart racing as she found the door surprisingly unlocked. “LAPD! Hands up!”

“Woah, don’t shoot!”

“What are you doing here?” Ellie demanded.

“We got a call regarding a domestic disturbance, and I’d say we’ve got one in front of us,” Nolan interjected, his voice steady and authoritative. “Now, can anybody tell us what’s going on?”

The man in the room finally found his voice. “My wife here filed for divorce and is suing me for full custody of our two kids,” he explained, pointing toward a scared young girl and boy huddled on the couch.

Ellie, feeling the tension begin to ease, holstered her weapon and exchanged a nod with Nolan. “Hey, kids, my name is Ellie, and this is John. We’re here to talk to your mom and dad, okay? Can you go upstairs for me until we’re done?”

The young girl nodded, her wide eyes showing a mix of fear and curiosity. She took her younger brother’s hand, and they hurriedly ascended the staircase, disappearing behind a closing door.

“Now, let’s talk,” Ellie said, her tone softer as she addressed the couple before her. “Can we talk?”

The wife nodded, her expression a mixture of anger and hurt. “My name is Laura; this here is Patrick. He’s a lying piece of cheating shit. Narcissistic to boot too.”

“What the fuck, Laura?!” Patrick shouted, his face turning red. “I told you I’m not cheating on you. And I’m NOT narcissistic, that’s your mother!”

“I’ve got all the proof, Patrick. Phone records, credit card statements, you name it. It’s over,” Laura spat, her voice shaking with frustration.

“Guys, come on. Have you guys ever gone to marriage counseling? Any remediation at all?” Nolan interjected, attempting to steer the conversation towards a more constructive direction.

“I tried to get him to go. He wouldn’t. Hell, all he would ever say is that he wouldn’t cheat on me again, and that was that. Even if he wasn’t, the mind games! The mind games are enough for me!” Laura's voice trembled as she spoke, the emotional turmoil evident in her words.

“What mind games, ma’am?” Ellie asked, her voice gentle, as she sought a way to shift the course of the argument.

“Always talking about how I would be nothing without him, how I was only ever meant to stay at home, mind the house, mind the kids, have dinner and a beer ready for him the moment he got home. Well, that shit might have worked back in the 60s and maybe the 70s, but it doesn’t work on me,” Laura explained with a mix of anger and exhaustion.

“That’s not true, and you know it,” Patrick said, his voice lowered, a hint of remorse in his eyes. “Laura, I love you. I fucked up before, but I swear, I’m not...” He trailed off, his words heavy with the weight of his emotions.

“Then why am I getting phone calls from Patrice, saying how you took her out to Antonio’s and to her house to fuck her?” Laura demanded, her voice quivering with a mix of anger and hurt. “I’ve got the proof, Patrick. The phone records with her phone number, the credit card statement.”

“Laura, Patrice is screwing with you. She’s been calling my number. I’ve only answered it to tell her to leave us alone. The credit card used at Antonio’s was me buying lunch for a coworker and myself, weeks ago.”

“I don’t believe you!”

“I've got proof. It's in the other room, in the office. Can I go get it?” Patrick looked at Ellie, seeking her permission.

“Yes, go ahead.”

Patrick walked away, his steps heavy with the weight of his own distress, and Ellie turned to address Laura, her tone gentle but firm. “Laura, maybe hear Patrick out? Look, I’ve been through situations like this before, and Officer Nolan and I only want what’s best for your family.”

Laura's expression remained hardened. “With all due respect, Officer Moore, I’m making the best decision for our family. I’m getting us away from him,” Laura spat back, her words laced with a combination of anger and determination.

“All I’m saying is –”

“Gun!” Nolan's voice boomed, his eyes widening as he saw Patrick re-enter the room with a gun in his hand. “Patrick, put the gun down.”

Ellie had her gun out, her hands steady but her heart racing, her mind processing the rapidly unfolding situation. “Patrick, come on, put the gun down.”

“Yeah, Patrick, what are you gonna do, shoot me?” Laura's remark carried a tone of bitterness.

“Shut up, Mrs. Reynolds!” Ellie's voice snapped, her attempt to regain control of the room evident. “Come on, Patrick, you don’t want to do this. Think about your kids.”

Patrick's grip on the gun seemed shaky as he turned it towards Nolan, tears streaking down his face.

“Wait, stop!” Ellie's voice was sharp and commanding, her body moving to step in front of Nolan, acting as a human shield.

“Officer Moore, out of the way,” Nolan's voice cut through, his tone brooking no argument.

“I’ve got this, John,” Ellie insisted, taking a cautious step closer to Patrick, her eyes locked onto his. “Hey, things can be fixed. Don’t do this. You don’t want this hanging over you; it will make it harder to fight for your kids.” Her words were a mix of urgency and empathy, an attempt to reach a desperate man through the fog of his emotions.

Patrick's sobs wracked his body, his shoulders trembling as tears streamed down his face. “I only cheated once, early in our marriage. She’s never let it go. Laura and I were literally on a date last week, and we were happy. I don’t recognize my wife anymore.”

“We can help, Patrick. Please, let us help you both,” Ellie pleaded, her voice laced with empathy and a hint of desperation. Her eyes filled with genuine concern as she stared at the distraught man before her. “Let me help.”

“I’m sorry, but you can’t. She has friends in high places. Higher than you. I will never see my kids ever again,” Patrick explained, his words weighed down by the heaviness of his despair. His vision blurred as tears continued to blur his sight.

“I understand what you're feeling, but fight against it. She may have influential friends, but that's okay. We can still help. Patrick, let me help,” Ellie's voice held a mixture of determination and compassion as she began to slowly extend her hand toward the gun he held, her breath held in anticipation.

“You can’t. I’m so sorry,” Patrick's voice was a quiet murmur, his grip shifting as he turned the gun and, in a heart-wrenching moment, shot himself in the head.

“No! Dad!” Ellie's anguished cry echoed through the room as she watched helplessly, her heart pounding, as he fell to the living room floor. The shock of the tragic scene unfolding before her was overwhelming, leaving her frozen in a moment of disbelief and sorrow.

“Ellie!”

“Patrick!”

Nolan and Laura both yelled out simultaneously, their voices laced with shock and grief. Laura's desperate steps propelled her towards Patrick's lifeless form, but John moved quickly to intercept her, his firm hold preventing her from reaching the scene of the tragedy. “Officer Moore are you okay?” he inquired urgently, his gaze assessing her for any injuries.

Surveying the somber tableau before him, John noted Ellie on her knees beside Patrick's motionless body, her uniform and face stained with blood, and her face an emotionless mask. The weight of the moment hung heavily in the air.

“He’s gone,” Ellie's voice was steady but carried an undercurrent of sadness that echoed through the room.

With a heavy sigh, John instructed Laura to go upstairs and check on her children, offering her a brief but supportive nod as she complied. As he reached for his radio, he summoned the necessary assistance. “7-Adam-15, I need an RA on site for our domestic dispute call, a suicide.”

“7-Adam-15, copy,” came the response, the acknowledgment a stark reminder of the heart-wrenching reality they were grappling with.

Ellie sat on the retaining wall at the perimeter, her face a mask of exhaustion and turmoil. She responded to Bailey's questions as best she could, her voice carrying a weariness that matched her expression.

“How is she?” Nolan approached them, his concern evident in his voice, having finished briefing the other officers on the scene.

Bailey motioned for John to step aside with her, creating a bit of distance from Ellie. “She’s in shock. She answered the questions I asked her, but it's clear she's exhibiting the classic signs. It's all there.”

John let out a heavy sigh, his weariness reflecting his emotional state. "I figured as much."

Curious and deeply concerned, Nolan asked, “What happened?”

“She tried to diffuse the situation, but it escalated rapidly,” John explained, his voice tinged with a mix of frustration and sorrow. “She even stepped in front of me, literally in the line of fire. She believed she could get through to him. To both of them.”

Bailey’s expression shifted to one of understanding mingled with empathy. “Oh man. No wonder she’s in the state she’s in. That’s a lot to carry.” She shook his head slowly, grappling with the gravity of the situation they had witnessed.

Nolan and Bailey both turned their attention as commotion arose behind them, witnessing Ellie confronting Laura directly.

“You drove him to suicide! You threatened that man's children! What kind of mother does that?” Ellie's voice carried a mix of anger and accusation, her finger pointed accusingly at Laura.

“You wouldn’t understand. You’ve never been in my shoes!” Laura's voice wavered; her emotions raw as she fired back.

“I have! I have been in your shoes!”

“Officer Moore,” Nolan's voice boomed, a commanding force aimed at diffusing the escalating situation. “Stand down, now!”

Unfazed, Ellie continued to vent her frustration, her arm extending upwards toward the house. “Your husband explained everything in that room,” she yelled, her voice rising with each word. “And you just kept going at him!”

“Officer Moore! I said stand down!” Nolan's voice carried an even greater authority, the urgency in his tone unmistakable.

“Bitch, I will have your job if you don’t leave me alone. Like Patrick said, I have friends in high places. I’d watch yourself if I were you,” Laura's voice was laden with a warning as she turned and walked away, the tension in the air still palpable despite her departure.

Ellie began moving towards Laura with determination before being firmly restrained by John's grasp. “You disobeyed a direct order. You need to get back to our vehicle before I strip you of your badge. Now.”

The frustration radiating from Nolan was unmistakable, and Ellie's realization of her error hit her hard. She had indeed messed up. “Yes, sir,” she replied, her voice quiet and remorseful as she turned away and headed toward their police unit, slipping into the passenger seat.

“John, given the circumstances –”

“Bailey, she literally went after the victim’s wife. I wasn’t the only one who saw that. I won't be able to explain her way through this,” John's voice held a mix of exasperation and concern.

“Actually, Officer Nolan,” another voice chimed in from behind them, catching their attention. Another officer stepped forward, offering a different perspective. “Laura went after her. I overheard her saying that Patrick didn't actually commit the things she accused him of.”

Nolan turned towards the officer, seeking her nametag for identification. “Officer?”

“Hernandez, sir,” the officer responded. “Officer Moore was approached by the deceased victim’s wife. Laura started confessing that Patrick was telling the truth, that she hadn't filed for divorce because doing so would leave her with nothing. She mentioned that by his death, she would gain everything.”

Nolan exchanged a look with John, realization dawning upon them both. The situation had more layers than initially apparent, and they now had a more complex puzzle to unravel.

Bailey looked at Nolan, her expression a mix of astonishment and disbelief. “So, she just confessed to murder by suicide, basically?”

“Basically,” Hernandez affirmed, her voice carrying a tone of gravity. “Look, I’ve got it all recorded on my bodycam. You can have the footage for your case.”

“Thank you. I’ll get our Sergeant to retrieve the footage. Can you swing by the station later to give your official report?”

“Yes, sir. Right after we wrap up here, I'll head over.”

“Thank you,” Nolan acknowledged, signaling the end of their conversation. He turned his attention back to Bailey, his brow furrowed in contemplation. “While this development helps Ellie’s situation, I still need to talk to her. There's something that's bothering me about all of this.”

“Just... be careful how you approach it, okay? If you push too hard, she might shut down completely. Approach it tactfully.”

John nodded, his gaze meeting Bailey's with understanding. “I'll see you tonight at home.”

“Of course, hot stuff,” Bailey teased, offering him a playful grin as he walked away.

Observing Ellie's gaze fixed on the passenger side window, Nolan felt a pang of sympathy. The upcoming conversation was one he wished to avoid, but it was necessary. Settling into the driver's seat, he turned to face her.

“I need answers, and I need them now.”

Alright, so, here's chapter two. Much longer too. Sorry for the delay, I ended up growing an extra appendage in the form of a 3 year old little girl. She and hubby are finally in bed and now I am heading that way.

I totally accept constructive criticism. As well as a beta. So, if anyone is interested, let me know!

I hope y'all enjoy. If you have any questions, let me know!

[moonlightknightess]

hello , first I would like to say that I missed you very much 😭 honestly , second so in Eremika open relationship au( they're married anf have a kid toggether) what If sasha got pregnant from Eren ofc by accident , how would sasha react ( I think she would have a mental breakdown and panic cause she'll feel like homewrecker and thinks Eremika will resent her and the child , and the child will never feel like his half siblings, then she'll start thinking about (TW!!!) Abortion or giving the child up for adoption) and how would eremik react and how would they know ?

TW: Mentions of abortion

Hiii 🥰 Before I start I have to say I really appreciate your words, seriously! I didn't really expect anyone missing my pressence here so knowing that there is people who really like the things I write makes me both happy and sad a the same time 😭 (I don't mean to dissapear like that I swear!) So thank you 🥲

Now this is prime angst material!!! I try to imagine the whole thing and it ends poorly everytime I do 🥲 like, she would seriously be terrified when she finds out that she sees the two lines on the pregnancy test and that there is no other person she does it with other than Eren fucking Yeager, her bf's husband who somehow managed to sweep her off her feet, so there is no doubts it's his

I imagine that she would struggle a lot with coming into terms with not only becomig a mother, but also knowing that it's her bestfriends husband who is the father, the very same guy who is expecting his own child with the woman he truly loves, making her lose her mind little by little, like going into all the 5 stages of grief until she goes to the doctor and he congratulates her for the baby, dooming her life forever 🥲

Yes she would feel like a homewreaker! This was not supposed to happen ever, they all agreed on it but certainly didn't plan on how to act if by any chances it happened, and the fact that Mikasa was already expecting her own bundle of happiness just makes everything worse since she doesn't want to ruin her moment, so she doesn't say a thing about it, secretly plotting on an abortion or leaving the kid up for adoption once she gives birth to them, which breaks her heart just at the mention of it since its not something she wants to do at all! She always wanted kids on her own so doing such a thing makes her sick in the stomach! But at the same time tries to understand she can't in anyway take charge of a kid, she is simply not ready yet

From now on this could go in two ways, a short one and a long one, the short one being that Sasha eventually tells them about the pregnancy and EreMika somehow convinces her to take an abortion, the whole experience so heart breaking for Sasha and EreMika doing their best to help her through all of it, giving it a somehow tragic and hopeful ending at the same time (? Idk lol

The long one would be something like those stories in which there is a happily married family that somehow find out that the husband got a bastard child, especifially by running into Sasha after some time since she seemed to dissapear from Eren and Mikasa's life, just to find her with a baby in her arms that got Eren's green eyes and Sasha's redhair, the both of them placing the pieces together once they realize why did she seemed to distant from them

Confessions are made and before she can blame herself for anything and swear to never bother them it's Eren who suggest to at least try to form a family of three, to help her with the burden of raising a child alone and to let him take resposability of his actions, maybe seek redemption for all the time he has missed, even if it wasn't technically his fault, Mikasa also agreeing to it as a way to help her friend and because she could never live with the fact that all this open relationship issue stressed Sasha so much and she never did anything to help her

They would try for some time, maybe spend some quality time as a big weird family, and for time it seems to work, Eren and Sasha seems to get along pretty fine whenever they have to take care of their child and Mikasa loves the idea of her little girl getting a half-sibling to play with, ultil she herself addresses the elefant in the room by saying that it didn't felt genuine, that everything in between them in the romantic aspects felt forced

And it would be true honestly, there was nothing in between Eren and Sasha nor Mikasa and Sasha outside physical attraction, they only seeked each other only for pleasure reasons so even if they tried, they couldn't make everything in between them work, it would be a good old "lovers who felt out of love" only difference being that they never fell in love, it was mostly lust that lead them to this situation

And yet, they still care for each other, and since the experience at least helped to create a bond in between the kids they would at least want to be around each other, Eren because he still wants to be a present father, Mikasa because she still sees Sasha's kid as and extension of Eren and because she stills holds Sasha dear to her heart plus the time they spent together made her feel like a mother to her friends kid too, and Sasha because she just always wanted her child and herself to be a part of their lives, all of them understandig that there are not romantic feelings in between them but still wanting to form a family, giving a more happier ending in which Eren and Mikasa still stay together and Sasha eventually finds someone else, preferably someone that doesn't mind the closeness their partner share with her kid's father and his wife... and that doesn't mind her messing around with them from time to time either 🤣

I really think I went overboard with this 🤭 I'm just weird like this sometimes i'm sorry 😭 this one has to be the craziest thing I ever headcannoned

The worst part is that I just know that if it wasn't settled in the eremika open rs au I would make this three have their big weird family have a disney-like ending omg 😂 someone help me (?

[an-aura-about-you]

so who wants a friggin' life update?? under the cut because I imagine it's gonna get long and it's gonna touch on topics of hospitalization and contemplating a parent's illness and mortality.

so as if me having to go back to the office wasn't enough, I got word from my sibling that our mother went to the doctor back on like Tuesday and the doctor was like, "ok you need to go to the ER, we're calling the hospital to let them know." so she goes to the ER and she's got pneumonia. this is on top of her myriad COPD issues, but this apparently got a bit weird because she was hella confused and barely eating or drinking anything. (I have been informed this last bit matches her current dietary habits fairly well.)

and the thing about the confusion is this episode lasted over 24 hours and was severe to the point that she couldn't recognize my sibling at all. our mother's sisters checked in on all this, and both of them are registered nurses, and according to them they don't think the hospital was taking her condition seriously.

this is the same hospital that was hella dismissive about my sibling's fibromyalgia, so at this point the entire family's dunking on them.

but like, as soon as she was lucid again, the doctor was like, "ok, we're discharging her!" one of my aunts was insisting on doing some testing now based on some other symptoms she saw, but the doctor was like, "we wanna wait to let the pneumonia clear up first." and I'm over here like, "??? Shouldn't This Have Been Done During The Confusion Episode? Am I Missing Something?"

anyway, she's back at home and the advice the doctors gave her going forward is stop smoking weed and see a neurologist. which at this point is just farcical. she's been smoking pot since she was in high school and has made it clear she's not going to stop now, and she's also apparently pitching a fit about not wanting to see the neurologist my aunt recommended.

(I find it kind of funny and kind of said that this same aunt is pretty hung up on the notion of me eventually reconciling with my mother. the last time I saw her, she was trying to talk my mother up to me with zero prompting on the matter. I have no idea if she's aware of all the times my mother has apparently shit talked about her to my sibling. like, stand-up sibling behavior on my aunt's part, I guess, but she's wasting her time not because I'm not gonna come around but because my mother doesn't seem to care about her sister at all.)

but the really funny part about this whole tragicomedy is that, even if my mother is set on smoking weed and watching cable tv until she dies, she's probably not going to get either soon. we're all aware of the strikes by now, but on top of that pretty much all her regular sources of weed are gonna be cut off. marijuana is legal for medical purposes here but not for recreational use, and her medical marijuana card is about to expire. BUT with this most recent episode and official medical records firmly stating that she's not to smoke weed, it's doubtful that her doctor's gonna let her renew her card. she's cut ties with her most consistent drug dealer because he's apparently somehow out-asshole'd her. I know some other family members enjoy pot, but I have no idea who if any of them would be willing to regularly supply her with weed.

honestly, I'd say this whole thing ended on a fairly tedious note if I thought it was actually over. I'm still wondering what the fuck was up with that confusion episode. I'm pretty fucking angry about the confusion, about how her mind just gave her a clean slate for a while. word is she was extremely pleasant and agreeable in her confusion, and I'm like how dare you forget the hurt you caused. how dare you be vulnerable and unaware of the abuses you committed and, according to the family members I still speak to, continue to commit. how dare you put me in the position where I have to be the bigger person about this.

that particular thing puts me in mind of The Magnus Archives, specifically the episode The Kind Mother. that episode struck a chord with me well before this bullshit became a regular part of my life. I ended up briefly discussing the episode with my sibling because we were talking about listening to some of TMA this weekend, and they agree this episode will probably mess us both up.

and I bitch like I'm not already doing the simplest solution about this matter, which is continuing not to see or talk to her. and between this and her own bitching/reluctance about continuing to see doctors, I get the disgusting shiver of agreement that I'm not the only one who thinks things might be better if she finishes what seems like this prolonged process of dying. it seems like everybody's misery will be over when it happens. my sibling, gods love her, still has some kind of affection for our mother and doesn't know what to do with themself with all of this. Dad hasn't said much about this matter, and come to think of it I haven't seen him in person since this began, though we've spoken on the phone. and I don't even know how I'm gonna feel. the anger was kind of a surprise. not much of one. we're talking like the Fry meme: "I'm shocked! Shocked! ...well, not that shocked."