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7fckingidiots · 4 years ago

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Would you be alright with writing some HCs about the brothers and a MC who's a trans guy? Sorry if it's a tall order or too vague, they're a big comfort for me and I'd like to see what ideas you have bcs your headcanons are fantastic ;w;

HELL YEAH DUDE!!!! IM ALSO TRANS!!! AH!!!!! demigirl rights :3 but i also find a huge comfort in the boys and i hc all of them as trans because no one can Stop Me •• but i really hope you enjoy these and remember you’re valid and i care u so much! Also i hope you don’t mind but i kinda made it gender neutral so every trans folk could enjoy!

The Brothers With A Trans MC

Lucifer

He didn’t know until you came out to him honestly. He knew all his other siblings were trans but with all the work Diavolo gave him and adding new students from different realms on top of that he hadn’t really had time to notice any minor changes in you.

He feels guilty about this and immediately makes sure(like everyone else)to ask for your pronouns, name, and how you would like to present yourself from now on.

Fixes your ID cards and your papers with Diavolo right after dinner

God. He’s such a dad and he gets you things that have your new name on them. You wake up to see you have a new pencil case with your name embroidered on it with matching pencils. God.....he’s so weird i love him so much

Asmo does most of your clothing shopping but for formal wear he takes you shopping! He’s not about to buy you some cheap tux or gown ok it’s gonna be over 2000 grim and he’s gonna get you three of them STOP HIM

He’s not the best with verbal affection so he writes down notes that are like “you looked very handsome/pretty today.” or when he first starts writing them they’re like “you’re a boy/girl/kid. i’m proud of you.” Thank u mr morningstar

You want surgery or to start hormones??? He will stop all his work with Diavolo and spend forever looking up things for you, he wants you to be as safe as possible(pls he almost fainted after he realized you’d have to give yourself a shot like everyday dhdhdhjdhd hc that demons/angels don’t have to do hormone therapy i’m so JEALOUS)

Practices saying your pronouns in his study when you first come out. He just wants to make sure you feel as safe as possible in his care(and he remembers how terrible it felt to be misgendered)

Guess what....he loves you no matter what :)

Mammon

You’re blind as hell if you couldn’t see his top scars but I respect it

King DOES slip up on your pronoun change but always immediately corrects himself. Satan has a spray bottle that he sprays Mammon with when he does it. Mammon is NOT amused but the same can’t be said for Belphie.

Gender affirming activities??? Oh yeah like robbing a bank?? That’s pretty gender neutral and trans right?? Yeah!!! Wow such a good supportive brother.

If you want you can wear the formal wear Lucifer bought you to the said bank heist. Boom trans rights

You can practice painting his nails or doing his makeup if you’re too nervous to do it on yourself first!! Dw if it’s bad he also can’t do makeup or paint nails so once you let him return the favor you’re both laughing and Asmo is distraught.

KING at dying hair he will get you whatever you need and if you want an entire different hair cut entirely he’s ON it

Very used to being Loud and Brash but if you need someone to talk to about anything really he always calms down and sits down to listen to whatever you have to say.

Lots of gendered gifts from him. This said for men??? Oh ok adds to cart. Oh pink??? For ladies??? yeah that can go in there too

You’re never gonna believe this.....But he loves you and supports you :)

Levi

He was the first one to come out to you at the house!! He was just so excited! Same hat!!!

Gets literally any video game where you can design the protag/have custom pronouns and will play games like that with you for hours

Would you like a pride flag.....for u.....He has too many.....Please take the trans flag please he has no room....he bought in bulk for a pride event and didn’t consider the consequences of his actions

Miku binder but irl. He will get if for you but unironically.....thanks King. He just likes binders with patterns and i respect IT

Dysphoria?? He gives you his hoodie bc that was his trademark dysphoria hoodie and i GUESS for you he can share............he would give u anything just ask nicely he’s sensitive

Reads any character that matches up with your gender and is like!!!!! That’s you!!!! OMG!!!! You in da IRL

Goes back and edits his tweets if they use your old name or pronouns(also has he/they in his bio. this is for nothing just makes me :D)

If you haven’t chosen your name he’s gonna suggest so many fictional characters. POV levi kin assigns you.

You listen to music together that just has Trans Vibes.....maybe u cry together but there’s no judgment!! It’s just nice :)

God it’s wild but! He loves u and thinks ur great :)

Satan

Enby Satan. That’s all :)

He’s very quite about it, he supports you! He’s just not loud like his brothers

He brings you book about gender studies and LGBTQ history that he thinks would interest you(there some of his favorite books and they’ve made him feel the most comfortable in his gender)

Gives you a name list if you haven’t named yourself yet! He cares about you and wants to make sure you have the right name that suits you

He’s the one that tells you that it’s ok if you’re still figuring it all out, learning about yourself is a very tricky process and if anyone knows that it’s Satan

Any of the brothers would kill anyone who misgendered you but with Satan that shit is ON SIGHT

Asks you how you know and what were the signs that gave it away to you, but only if you’re comfortable telling him!! He just finds everyone’s experience interesting and would like to know yours as well.

Spells for fucking DAYS Satan personally kills body dysphoria the best he can(mainly bc he’s HIGHKEY afraid of you getting surgery he hates knives so much)

Makes your comfort food for you when you’re feeling down about yourself and will read whatever you want to hear outloud to you.

!!!!!! GET THIS !!!!!! He loves YOU :0

Asmo

Fucking excited!!!! This means you two are going to buy so much clothing together and he gets to style you let’s GO

Buys you whatever you want but he will make you try it all on so be CAREFUL what u wish for.....ur gonna be there till the store closes yeah......

Paints your nails with the trans pride flag!! Also does your makeup and gives you tips on how to look more masculine or fem!!

VOICE LESSONS

He will help you lower or raise the pitch of your voice if it KILLS him. It eventually becomes like a mini class after school

Helps with internalized transphobia! Hes dealt with his fair share and knows how awful it can be and he will NOT being having you experience that as well we r practicing Self Care now

Picks apart any one who misgenders you until they’re crying he has NO fucking time for that behavior in this HOUSE

Sometimes self care is eating whatever you want and sitting in the dysphoria hoodies while watching chick flicks with Asmo

He likes dressing you up but he’s always sure to set boundaries so he never puts you into something that makes you feel uncomfortable

ALSO edits his posts and takes down anything that makes you uncomfortable!!

He loves you so much!!!!

Beel

another one to hand you The Dysphoria Hoodie and it’s very large and comfy!

he’ll help you make out a work out routine that will help you get the body you want and it makes him really happy to work out with you :)

he’s gonna hold your hand if you have to take shots and will give you puppy eyes if you don’t let him. He’s just worried!!!! He wants to help

stands behind you whenever you’re nervous about coming out to someone, he will NOT have someone making you feel bad or misgendering you

he’ll see food with trans pride colors and gives it too you, probably doesn’t even know what it is half the time but it made him think of you so he makes sure to get it for you

he doesn’t trip up on any of your new pronouns or name and makes it seem like he never even knew them. dead name???? what’s that??? a type of sauce?????

will let you vent to him whenever needed and will always make you a sundae after you’ve finished. it’s comically huge but it’s tasty and does make you feel a lot better, thanks beel

makes sure you remember to take off your binder if you’ve been wearing it for more than eight hours! and if you’ve been wearing heels to feel more fem he reminds you to take those off too and has a pair of slippers for you in his room that you can wear instead

hey! get this! He loves you so, so much :D

Belphie

you’re trans? ok kid join the club. he doesn’t make a big deal at all

are you still gonna cuddle with him and join him in his quest to make lucifer’s life difficult? yeah? ok then cool what’s ur name

if he hears someone misgender you he waits till you’ve left the room and just kills whoever did it, dude’s unhinged what did you expect from him honestly

he’s actually really curious about any hormone therapy you’re on and likes listening to you rant about it to him. he likes seeing your face light up and it partly reminds him of lilith

calls your hormones something stupid like “oh dude, your gamer girl juice arrived.” or “hey your little man potion is here.” ...thanks belphie

will NOT let you sleep in a binder or push up bra!!! not healthy!! let ur chest breath guys

like mammon, he gets you gendered gifts but they’re so fucking weird? you didn’t need a girls version of a collectable hot wheels set???? he got you blue lightning mcqueen sheets?????? those EXIST here????!!!!! when does he even shop......

introduces you to new people like “this is our resident boy/girl/human. they don’t do much but i think they’re cool.”

he really does care about you but he remembers when he came out he just didnt want people to make a big deal about it so he’s just doing what would have made him feel the most comfortable, but you can still see how much love he has for you when you look into his eyes

he loves you, so, so much :)

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myriadimagines · 4 years ago

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Okay hi Sam, congrats again for 9k!! I'm terrible with requesting anything ever and gaaahh even when you're my friend I'm nervoussss because I'm just fearing I screw up. But maybe now when I don't have to make up any plot I could request?? But I requested an ID card from musicallisto too so you got this Jen... sooo could I get a ship drabble thing for The Maze Runner with prompt 32? (I literally just stuck my finger on random prompt BECAUSE I CAN'T CHOOSE MYSELF THEY ALL ARE SO GOOD) (1/7)

So for the apperance: I'm 5"8 girl, she/her. I have short, black pixie hair (my own hair color is brown), light skin and blue eyes with long eyelashes. I don't use makeup very often but sometimes I like to make myself pretty, usually if there's a birthday party or if I'm just bored. I usually wear t-shirts and jeans (long, capris or shorts depending on season). 2/7

Personality: I'm INFP-T Hufflepuff and very shy and timid with strangers, and I don't like big groups. At big parties you probably find me frozen against the wall and not moving. But with friends I'm very loud and make a lot of bawdy jokes. My friends say I'm loyal and kind. Despite that, I can be quite a hothead and it shows especially if I'm provoked by wrong people. 3/7

I also am very protective of my friends, going as far as cutting ties with people if they are mean to my friends (even if they haven't done anything for me personally). I've been told I'm like a lion protecting its pack in those situations. But if I have to deal with such situations myself (that people are mean to me) I'm incapable to survive from it without help, because I'm just blurting random things out if I'm angry at someone and I haven't learned to control it yet. 4/7

It often leads to people finding me childish when fighting. I find it difficult to talk verbally and I'm just awkward if I have to actually use my words. My hobbies include writing, learning to read more books, learning to play piano (I'm not very good with it yet though), play video + board games, taking long walks to the forest, fangirling and just clowning around. I want to be a crazy guinea pig lady when I'm old. 5/7

And for sexuality: I don't know my sexuality yet (I recently got to know there's a term called fictosexual though which means having sexual attraction for fictional characters), but I've been crushing on guys more than girls in fictional worlds. I've never dated anyone irl but I haven't really been wanting to date anyone as fictional characters have been enough for me as for now. But both genders are cool!! 6/7

Characters: Reader x Newt

Warnings: alcohol

Prompt: 32. “Oh God… I think I’m in love with you.”

Word Count: 475

A/N: thank u so much jenni!!! also u didnt screw this up at all and i’m super glad to hear u liked the prompt list :’) i debated between thomas and newt but decided to go with newt, i hope u like it!! 💕

NOT TAKING ANYMORE REQUESTS!

“Didn’t fancy on joining in on the celebrations?” Newt asks as he approaches you. He holds a mug out to you, and you wrinkle your nose, already knowing the disgusting alcohol concoction inside, but you take the cup anyway. He sits beside you, and you try to ignore how close his leg is to yours as he continues, “I have a good feeling about the new Greenie. I quite like him.”

Both you and Newt look over to the bonfire, where you can see Thomas a short distance away, getting to know the other Gladers. He looks disoriented, and understandably so — you remember how lost you felt upon entering the Glade for the first time.

The both of you turn away from the scene, falling silent as you listen to your fellow Gladers loudly cheering and jostling one another, enjoying the festivities. You enjoy Newt’s quiet company far more than the wild party raging on behind you, and you’re grateful for his calming presence. He takes a sip from his drink, wrinkling his nose at it slightly before he remarks, “Do you remember your first day?”

You gulp. It comes to you in your nightmares, the flashing lights, the loud mechanic sounds of the elevator. You slowly nod, and Newt chews his lip, “Yeah, me too. Was ages ago, but I still remember it like yesterday.”

“Do you think we’ll ever leave this place?” you blurt, and Newt falls silent, leaving you feeling miserably uneasy. Your shoulders slump, knowing the answer to your own question, and you let out a sad laugh as you remark, “I shouldn’t talk about this. We’re supposed to be partying.”

Newt doesn’t respond again, before he lets out a heavy sigh. He turns to face you, and you feel your cheeks getting flushed under his intense gaze as he tells you, “Look, I know it’s easy to feel hopeless about this whole situation, but we’ll be alright. We’ve got each other, yeah?”

You know Newt’s referring to the entire Glade, but you can’t help but think about just the two of you in this private moment. Newt’s always had that effect on you, making you feel as if you’re the only two people who matter, and you find yourself at loss for words before you suddenly confess, “Oh God… I think I’m in love with you.”

Newt blinks at you in surprise as you quickly clasp a hand over your mouth, but he quickly laughs to ease the tension. Gesturing to your cup, he teases, “I see the drink has gotten to you.”

You snort, quickly downing some, as if trying to wash the words out of your mouth. But Newt leans his leg up against yours as he takes a sip from his own drink, and you can see him smile out of your corner of your eye.

#tmr imagine #newt imagine #tmr #tmr drabble #newt #newt drabble #imagine #imagines #reader insert #drabble #drabbles #9k celebration #swanimagines

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planetjisungie · 4 years ago

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jolie- l.mh (part 1)

characters; prince! mark, princess! reader ft. dreamies, yuta and taeyong

summary; when you turn 18, you have to marry the prince of the eastern kingdom to secure an alliance. but what happens when your natural immature and positive personality collides with his cold and negative one.

an; king mark lee needed an au all to himself because this boy deserves the whole world, lets not lie here. also like i love this picture and it sparks big prince energy or like nutcracker ballet energy. also me deciding after 2 days of wallowing in self pity about how i hate having longass posts so im putting it into parts

"y/n! wake up darling!" your mother shook your body awake, causing you to grumble and thrash around. you were just having a dream about this peculiar event of 2 people switching bodies after a handshake. it was rather odd yet entertaining.

"what" you throw your limbs out on the bed in a lazy attempt to stretch and let out a groan. youe mother sighed and stood back. "its your 18th birthday today, the maids have your dress"

ah. there it is. the day youve literally blocked from your mind because of how much you simply detested the idea. it was signed and agreed 6 years ago that you, princess of the southern kingdom, would marry a prince from the eastern kingdom. though you had never met either of the princes, you had heard plenty of rumours and tales, some you believed, some you did not.

you slowly climbed out of bed, staggering a little as you walked towards the maids for your dressing. you didn’t actually need them, unless you were supposed to wear the death trap which is labelled a corset, but your parents insisted on you having them. so, you naturally made friends with them to make it as least of a work space as possible.

"good morning yeonha, nari" you greeted them with a smile which they returned. just because you weren’t necessarily the happiest doesnt mean you should relay the feeling onto the poor maids, and your friends.

"morning princess" nari said, causing you to roll your eyes. yes, they still called you princess out of habit and you hated it. as soon as your brother becomes the king, the first thing you’re doing is making everyone call you by your first name (as your parents refuse to let that happen as of currently).

with a deep sigh, you allowed yourself to be dressed, the constricting corset making you feel like your ribs were about to snap. the dress itself was beautiful though, a long pale blue dress which was off the shoulder, and had mesh sleeved elasticated around your wrists. your h/l hair was naturally curled, and fell around your face delicately as soon as the pin was removed, and one of your maids brushed the tresses. you were lucky in the aspect of hair, it was truly gorgeous and you had never hated it.

the heels were a slightly different case. they pinched your toes and no matter how much training you had to walk in them- they were satans creation. you preferred simple satin slippers, or just any shoe that does not have a stick on the end which could impale someone. a small golden and intricate crown was places atop your head, glittering earrings in and you were finished. you never really needed makeup, your natural beauty was well known in your kingdom though the people saw your kindness shine through more.

the southern kingdom was a very foresty and almost tropical place, with warm breezes and turqouise oceans, yet beautiful green trees and luscious grass, it was practically perfect. the eastern kingdom, was known to be a pretty cold place, not as freezing as the northern kingdom yet not as warm as the southern kingdom. oddly enough, the western kingdom was the hottest, mainly composed of sand and dry stone, one of your best friends lived in the western kingdom, prince jaemin.

huffing again, you left your room, concealing the winces from your feet which were already saw as you walked with quick steps to the throne room, where you would be waiting for the arrival of the eastern royalties. or so you thought. the frown on your face diminished into a look of shock and confusion when you saw the princes already there, turning to your parents who were glowering at you. oops, you were late.

"ah, y/n nice for you to finally join us" your mother said, grabbing your wrist and dragging you to stand next to her, facing the princes who were already bowing to you. there were two of them, one of which looked a little older with dark grey hair, and the other who had pitch black hair (pitch black hair was superior). the boy with grey hair was smiling at you and your curtseyed politely, but the black haired boy... he didnt look like he cared at all. reluctantly, you curtsey quickly before shooting a look at your mother.

"we welcome you warmly, prince taeyong and prince minhyung. we hope you enjoy your stay for the next month, dont hesitate to come to us if anything is not up to standards" your father bowed towards the boys. you stared distatastefully at the ground before looking up with a smile. even if you didnt want to marry yet, you may as well be nice to them as it is inevitable.

"y/n, go and make yourself useful whilst we show taeyong and minhyung their rooms" your mother said, staring into your eyes like a hawk. nodding you spun on your heels and walked out of the room rapidly, letting out a thankful sigh that you got out of that situation. roaming down the halls, you walk around, looking for any staff.

"oh! jeno!" you sped towards the knight in training. lee jeno was the mentoree of your mother’s knight, and soon to become yours.

"y/n!" he grinned and you wrapped your arms around him in a tight, warm hug. if you actually had a choice, you probably wouldve married jeno, seeing as he was your best friend and it wouldve been more of a friendship based marriage.

"how are the princes?" he asked, you locking your arm in his as you both walked down the halls. rolling your eyes you turned to face him.

"you know how i feel about this whole shitty marriage debacle. id rather not marry either- though im sure they’re lovely" that was another thing you did. always giving people the benefit of the doubt. jeno grimaced and nodded, his black hair bouncing softly as he did so.

"yeah i know. but you have a month, so maybe it would be good to try and get close to them at least" his naturally deep voice you had grown accustomed to, and it was hard to deny anything he said as all he spoke was truth. it wasnt like you had a choice anyway, it was all for some alliance. "yup" you muttered. looking outside, you saw sicheng, the gardener, planting new flowers and you gasped, tugging jenos arm. "look! lets go help out winwin" you dashed outside as fast as you could in your death traps for the feet, jeno trailing behind you. he knew how much you loved gardening and the outside.

"winwin~" you plopped next to him, promptly kicking off your heels as you kneeled on the soft grass, dress awkwardly flowing out around you. the gardener turned to you and smiled, pausing from digging out the old flowers and replacing them with newer ones.

"princess, did you need anything?" he asked, his attention now fully on you. nodding, you grab the other two trowels and handed one to jeno, grinning at winwin. "we have come to help" you announced, jeno chuckling at your eagerness to dig into soil. winwin nodded. "i see. well, you know what to do"

that was true. you often did spend time gardening with winwin and jeno, so it was unsurprising that you wanted to help again. digging into the dirt with a smile, you chatted with jeno and sicheng, just having a general good time whilst listening to the birds chirping and the riverstreams around the palace rushing. it was a very peaceful place, and you enjoyed it.

mark, who had finished talking with your parents was walking with his advisor, johnny, just around the castle when he saw your brother, prince yuta, looking out the window with a wide smile on his face. once yuta noticed their presence, he bowed towards them.

"oh, my apologies for not noticing you sooner" he apologised, which mark turned down with a small smile telling him it was okay. "is there something going on outside?" johnny asked, moving next to the window to see if something interesting was happening. following johnny, mark also stood at the window, all three of them now squeezed in as they looked out onto the palace gardens. marks gaze wandered before it landed on the 3 figures on the ground, planting flowers. it wasnt hard to figure out one of them was you, your crown gleaming in the sunlight. "did your parents force her to garden for a punishment?" johnny inquired to yuta who shook his head. "not at all, that doofus of a sister of mine likes doing things and has recently found enjoyment in gardening with sicheng" he answered softly, looking at his sister with adoration.

even from the window, mark could practically feel the waves of happiness radiating off of her. yet, they werent there when they met that morning.

#nct #mark #mark lee #lee minhyung #taeyong #lee taeyong #jolie #nct 127 #nct u #yuta #nakamoto yuta #prince mark is supreme

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pinkykitten · 5 years ago

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I was tagged by @writing-with-melon I hope my answers aren’t complete waste or if time and if so I’m sorry and I love you

Rules: Answer ten 10 questions, ask 10, and tag 10 people

1. What song automatically plays in your head when you look out the window on a long drive?

i dont really have an answer for this. i think i just automatically think about any song ive been listening to recently or any song that has been stuck in my head.

2. Do you have some snacks nearby when you write?

well i live in a two story house so the kitchen is downstairs and im usually lazy busy so since i have a mini fridge upstairs i just usually get water to drink while im writing. its kinda hard to eat and write cuz i loose focus really easily so when i am writing i am writing! i am in the zone! but if i am a little hungry ill usually snack on candy like chocolate kinder joys i love them but they r so expensive or snack on chips but i get like salt on my fingers or i like cheetos so cheetos dust and that just gets everywhere and later my hands and keyboard kinda smell like fart. 3. What do you do to combat creative burnout?

so burnout happens to me a lot so to get inspiration i either read other stories or fanfics which gets my head gears turning or i admire a piece of art or photography or a song. whats so unique and satisfying with writing you can explore and go anywhere with it, hehehe erotic if you know what i mean lol jk there are no barriers with writing just your imagination. there is inspiration any where you go and id advise to never stop writing. even if its a few short sentences or paragraphs about anything even bird poop its still progression and your mind is working and your searching for words like its all good for you bby. 4. Do you use (or like to use) prompts?

i do ill put the link here. im thinking of changing it though to do something different.

5. What is your favorite place to write?

lol boring, i know but my room. my room is really bright in the mornings and comfortable and chill and i have a candle of the pandora ride in disney that smells like the ride so its all good and relaxing and super peaceful plus i have a picture of myself the age of like 9 on my desk idk why but it encourages me and makes me focus to make sure i never get that cringy again.

6. What is a hobby or yous that you usually don’t talk about?

well i like working out HAHAHAHAHA jk that was a joke...get it...cuz i much rather be eatingokillstop. but i really like to draw which i have a art page you can see it if you click here pls look at my failed attempts to be hip and cool with the cool kids and being artsy fartsy. another hobby is i really like to do makeup and nail art, nail art is really tough guys no joke if you do it like you got wizard powers are something. maybe its bc my nails are shorter than pete davidson and ariana grande’s relationship, alright im trying to stop i swear!

7. Do you play an instrument? Which one?

no i wish though. i always wanted to learn to either play the piano or electric guitar cuz H.E.R looks so cool doing it.

8. How do you feel about your handwriting?

it sucks dont even try me. my sister can barely read it like no wonder nobody wants to steal my signature heck they can’t even read it!

9. Can you tell us of a story that marked your development as a person? As a writer?

ok sit back guys, sniff a nice amount of crack and get ready for the most cringy moment of my life but also a time when i knew i was meant to be *inhale* a fanfic writer.

so it was elementary school, i think 3rd grade and for my writing assignment we were given a prompt of idk what the heck tbh i think it was like be outside the box and im like ok imma nail this cuz im a weird child and yeah so i got my papers and pencil and i went TO TOWN on this paper. so i wrote two stories. one short story with a picture to go with it and one long story that yeah i buried years ago. so my first story was about a farmer was about that farming life. he had chickens and dairy. so i cant remember if the cheese was spoiled but doesnt matter. anywho these cheese and a chicken were alive like they could talk in the story and i gave them faces, yikes. but the whole story was the farmer was a b*tch and he was trying to eat the chicken and cheese so they hatched a plan to get away from the farmer. they did it successfully and they ran away. yay happy ending my teacher actually liked that one me too and my school mates were thinking what they heck is this girl on i made a story about how me and justin bieber made cookies for Christmas you know. so then my other story i was more proud of this one cuz it was a tone of paper, sorry trees, and this story was about how a female hippo (girl i was all about plus size and thicker girls and no body shaming) and an male ostrich were kidnapped from their own habitats and taken to become circus animals. failed version of Madagascar hey mine was before the circus movie OK THEY STOLE IT FROM MEEEEE. so they get taken and are treated to harsh punishment and the animals can talk and i think its in the point of view of the male ostrich guy thing. they are in the circus and they start to have this relationship happening. love starts blossoming its all good. im happy with this cuz i believed in love at age of 8. they find a way thru a kick butt scene of the animals escaping and the hippo and ostrich are so in love that they run away together and they have half hippo half ostrich babies and i think i named the species hipstrich or like ostppo idk but i was so proud of this story and when my teacher read it she was worried about me lol i think she thought i might like mate these two animals like secretly idk but she was like it was ok and i was like what this is frickin William Shakespeare writing or like F. Scott Fitzgerald writing. nevertheless it taught me a lesson that nobody else needs to like what im writing the main point and only thing that matters is if your proud of it and you like it and i really did. i will remember that story forever and thats what made me want to be a writer. lol sorry that was a lot.

10. @emdop I’m going to use this great question: Explain one of your WIPs in the most ridiculous way possible.

wellllll im working on my peaky blinders oc story its a lot of drugs money killing weapons jewelry rich profanities like its the show but written from my stubby hands so my oc and whatever its great and so excited to show it to you guys.

MY QUESTIONS:

1. WHAT MADE YOU WANT TO START TUMBLR?

2. IF YOU COULD CHANGE ANYTHING OF THIS WORLD, WHAT WOULD IT BE?

3. WHAT QUALITY IS IMPORTANT TO YOU?

4. WHAT IS YOUR FAVORITE OUTFIT?

5. WHAT MAKES YOU SMILE?

6. WHAT IS YOUR FAVORITE SONG IN THE WHOLE WORLD?

7. IF YOU COULD VISIT A PLACE, WHERE WOULD IT BE?

8. WHAT SHOW OR MOVIE UNIVERSE WOULD YOU WANT TO BE IN?

9. WHAT IS THE SCARIEST MOMENT OF YOUR LIFE?

10. WHAT DO YOU WANT MORE IN THIS WORLD THAN ANYTHING ELSE?

im tagging: @thatlittlered, @ardentmuse, @acciosnapes, @lotsoffandomimagines, @collecting-stories, @blog-of-a-multitude-of-fandoms, @naughtyneganjdm, @lenahellgizibe and two random followers @spiritsent, @sucker-for-my-fandoms

i was tagged by @writing-with-melon again ty btw, ps i felt so much pressure lol jk 😊

Rules: Answer 5 questions, Ask 5 questions, Tag 5 people.

1. What is your favorite book?

fifty shades of grey hahaha naw my favorite book is obv you all know this is series of unfortunate events but i never usually cry period and i never cry for books ever so when i read mrs. tom thumb by melanie benjamin, its the part when her sister minnie dies i cried so hard idk it was just emotional the wording the way she described her pain it was so beautiful written yet so sad and that was just amazing to me cuz im like this book made me feel things and im like wow i would love to write a book one day and make someone feel something whether it be sadness anger happiness annoyance anything they are having an emotion and that is super powerful to do that with just words. pls go check out that book its a good read. also im a fan of the greatest showman so i really enjoyed it. there are many other books tho that i thoroughly enjoy so much.

2. What piece that you’ve written are you most proud of?

oh my god ive always wanted to be asked this question hands down i am always proud of my platonic gender neutral tony stark fic called in·con·sol·a·ble window to me i wrote it so sad and i was feeling like depressed lol when i saw peter die in infinity war like i didnt know what to do with my life tbh but im so glad that @impetrichorny requested it tysm i just like how its not based on romance or fluff or happiness it is based on when you lose someone the nightmares and sadness you go through and that there is nothing nobody can do about it except just be there for that person so i really like writing angst and something that was out of the box. ive been thinking tho of doing a part two since the fate of all the characters has changed after endgame. who knows tho.

3. What is the last song that inspired you?

well for art it would have to good news by mac miller when i did that kobe bryant memorial on my art page. i dont want to give it away though but ill just say some very powerful womens music inspired my oc writing and making.

4. How do you feel about letting people read what you write?

at first i was scared cuz i thought i wrote like trash which that feeling kinda doesnt go away like some days i feel that way others i feel confident or it depends on the request it just depends but anyways i was always insecure about my writing so when i started writing it was more like lets see how this goes if not ill delete the whole page. im glad to say it went great but in the begging it was hard cuz i kept putting myself down but i learned to accept or just understand that you keep learning with writing you always learn knew things with writing how you can explain something better or you words get more intricate and people see the improvement and you do too thats why i applaud those who dont speak english that english isnt their first language. you are doing a tremendous job and keep practicing cuz you’re gonna make it to the top. ive also learned that some days are not my days and you can take time off when youre not feeling it when you have writers block. just recollect your juices sip some tea go to the beach relax your mind a little and take as long as you need to come back and give it your all. also comments and reblogs and likes a follows those meant so much to me and encouraged me. thats why i cant express it enough how much all those mean to writers, artist, photographers, anybody who is truly trying their hard in this area of social media. its makes a person happy smile and confident in their writing but first train your mind into loving what you make not what others thing. you have to be happy with the outcome that is what truly matters and what makes your writing the best. look at me getting philosophical.

5. Do you get distracted easily? If yes with what?

yes and with porn haha i get distracted easily like very easily homeschooling was really tough for me. music distracts me, netflix, the urge to watch david dobrik or unus annus or buzzfeed unsolved on youtube, heck my farts distract me. i gotta be like troy bolton i gotta get my HEAD IN THE GAME!

MY QUESTIONS:

1. IF YOU COULD BE NAMED SOMETHING ELSE, WHAT WOULD YOU BE NAMED?

2. WHAT PERSON INSPIRES YOU THE MOST?

3. IF YOU KNEW THE WORLD WAS ENDING TOMORROW WHAT WOULD YOU DO TODAY?

4. WHAT DO YOU OFTEN THINK ABOUT IN THE SHOWER?

5. WHATS YOUR WEIRD COMBINATION FOOD?

im tagging: @thatlittlered, @ardentmuse, @acciosnapes, @lotsoffandomimagines, @collecting-stories AND WHOEVER WANTS TO DO THIS IF YOU FOLLOW ME OR LIKE MY STORIES TAG ME ILL READ YOUR ANSWERS. HOPE I DID THIS RIGHT SORRY FOR TAKING SO LONG YOU GUYS ARE AMAZING MWUAH

#ask #@writing-with-melon #rambles #writing #tips on writing #unus annus #david dobrik #netflix #buzzfeed unsolved #peaky blinders oc #kobe bryant #mac miller #tony stark #peter parker #the greatest showman #tom thumb #troy bolton #zac efron

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kweebtrash · 4 years ago

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Hey, not necessarily a sex question. But as someone who loves reading fanfic and appreciates fanfic writers, I still can't bring myself to write it. How did you get into writing fanfic, and was it ever weird for you? Do you have any advice on how to feel less weird about it? Especially smut about real people? (To be fair I can't bring myself to write smut in general idk why)

I started writing naruto and yu yu hakusho fanfiction when i was ten and it was just a regular oc and the character i liked. It wasnt good at all but i thought it was the greatest. When i met my sister (non biological) in middle school we decided to come up with our own "anime story". We would write it in notebooks and pass it to each other during class and get in trouble for it. So i guess that was the first time ive written an "original" story. By the time i was 12 i knew what sex was (mostly) and i knew teenagers did it (my characters were teenagers) so i was like oh if they like each other then they should do it. But because i was 12 i was like THATS ICKY TO WRITE ABOUT (in detail) so i made them get in bed and then skipped ahead and wrote THE NEXT DAY 😂😂😂

Then when i got access to a laptop and internet thats when i round "real" fanfiction online and smut back when it was called "lemon/lime/citrus" whatever the fuck that means. I still remember my first one was about neji hyuga LMAO.

I started reading more fanfiction throughout my teenager years and kept writing for anime, wrote bandfiction, created a bunch of OCs to rp with my partner at the time and i think by the time i actually started having sex that i was like ok this isnt so weird to write about anymore. So when we would rp we would just text each other sex scenes and i guess it became normalized because we were doing it irl so writing about it was just like hey! We sorta know what were doing! Oh i also used to watch a lot of porn as a teen? Idk why. That stopped after like a year or so but i found out shit through that, like bdsm, squirting, how utterly gross blowjobs are, what a hitachi wand was, how much i hate spit, etc. So that actually helped me discover like my beginning kinks. Porn is still terrible tho.

I think the first time i wrote smut was with a wrestling fanfic? And i had been reading a bunch of fics that had smut and with my basic knowledge and slowly finding out what phrases i liked in order to describe things it flowed a little more naturally but it was still hard.

Then i think i didnt really write much until i wrote my pentagon story which i think is terrible but other people like it. I guess with my practicing, experience, and sex education it started becoming easier? You can tell in my pentagon story that i was still getting back into the swing of things bc my sex scenes are atrocious and ridiculous 😅

I never really liked reading series myself bc i didnt want just prose and build up. I wanted smut. I was like THATS WHAT I CAME HERE FOR. So i made it a point to write smut in every single chapter so that way people stayed interested. In doing so it also helped me practice and get better. Then i read A LOT of bad kpop fics and was like....why dont these people know that sex isnt like porn??

There is a lot of copying in kpop fics in the sense that a lot of them are written the same way and we get the usual; some u realistic giant dick, "ministrations, pussy, cunt", kitten every other word, thigh riding, everyone confusing abuse with bdsm, "daddy" popping up left and right without going in depth to what meaning that holds, random weird shit. And i realized WOW I REALLY HATE KPOP FANFICS lol. So when i started writing messy i was like OK FUCK THIS IM GONNA WRITE SEX LIKE HOW ITS SUPPOSED TO GO. Then i starting writing smut where the condom broke, they talked about birth control, having a mental breakdown during sex, sexual assault, accidentally wacking each other while moving around, giggling, talking, explaining what you want. This i think helped me a lot, especially with my mental trauma that was associated with sex. I wanted to make it fun and real while also possibly teaching my readers about sex and maybe influencing other fic writers to not just regurgitate what they read.

As far as advice, im not quite sure if i have any?? Maybe i do lol. Take it with a grain of salt maybe?

With writing i would suggest

Read fics you like and highlight key phrases or actions you think are sexually appealing

Practice writing shorter scenes, you can even do time stamps or drabbles, things like that-people love those on here

Look into things. Honestly i knew what a cock ring was but someone requested i USE it in a fic and i was like shit guess i gotta google how to use a cock ring and while awkwardly watching videos of guys putting these things on i learned about metal ones, cages, silicone, rubber, rings, how long you should keep it on for, etc. So RESEARCH! is key too

If youve never had sex before that also helps if you research. Porn can give you a little bit of knowledge in generic motions or toys to use but by no means is it great as far as realism and sometimes its just plain icky.

So porn can be a basis, research can be a middle layer, reading other fics and seeing what you like and dont like is on top, and writing ur own is like...idk frosting lol.

As far as being weird with real people; since i wrote bandfiction and wrestling fics i was used to writing about real people for a little under ten years or so. Also i have a really active mind at night and i have tons of sex dreams that fit into like a story based setting. Thats where all my ideas for prose, dialogue and smut come from. Not everyone ofc has a brain like that but writing down things here and there might work. Lets say you have a favorite idol moment-like some really slutty dance move during a performance, you could time stamp that for inspiration. Save a lot of gifs and pics of them looking *chefs kiss*, listen to some music (i like alina baraz, sabrina claudio, galant, alex tbh, and jooyong for softer, gentler scenes or if you wanna get freak nastie listen to some dumbass jae park, or pretty ricky, or any sex related song thats not pretty lmao. Like rude boy by rihanna or something with a hard beat).

I think its also good to try and picture yourself in a sexual situation. You dont have to look like you, you could make up however you want to look in the scenario, its fantasy after all. Also think "would i like this?" Like i wont write about some idol spitting in my mouth or slapping me or peeing on me or something because thats not stuff that im into and i would be forcing myself to appease someone else and the writing woukd end up sucking big time. This also doesnt help the lack of good fics bc people are just following the requests they get even if they dont like it. I would write about what i think id feel in the moment. Id probably be nervous or if im pretending i could be a cool badass, i would think about things that i find attractive like his (imma use his bc i do write mostly about boy idols) face in the shadows of the light, how nice or soft his lips look, they way hes conveying emotions and looking at me if we were in love or if we were angry, the hold he has on me, why would it be going slow? Is it sad makeup sex? Is it a first time together? Is it just comforting after a bad day? Why would they be rough? Are they angry? Had a fight? Had a slow burn relationship and its culminated into a big explosion? Did they hate each other but hide their true feelings?

So i would suggest not just thinking about sex but thinking about the moment and all the things that lead up to, happen during, and the aftermath of it.

And of course if you don't understand anything or need more info about sex you can always ask me!

I hope this help and sorry its long😅😅😅😅

#i love my readers!

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themaskedwriter · 6 years ago

Text

Leave Me Weak

Clues

If you want to find me just look to the sky. I mainly write for Bucky but I’ve struck gold in other characters.

Pairing: Bucky Barnes x Reader (AU)

Word Count: 5045

Warnings: fluff, descriptions of blood donation (needles/blood)

Summary: Donating blood was the last thing you wanted to do but you find that something else leaves you weak.

You knew this was a mistake.

Pushing your way onto the street in the pitch black night you pass through a small crowd outside the nightclub, with clouds of smoke drying out your already tired eyes.

Even though you lived in “the city that never sleeps” it wasn’t a rule you followed. You were accustomed to a very strict sleeping schedule for work that would normally have you waking up at this time but Nakia’s bachelorette party was not something you could miss, even if you knew you’d be paying for it later.

Sometimes you missed weekends like this, where you could stay out until the sun rose in the sky, sobering up with greasy fries smothered in cheese and steaming cups of freshly brewed coffee.

Mmmm coffee. You need to have some as soon as possible, especially if you’re expected to be up for the next few hours preparing the baked goods for the crowds that filtered into the Excelsior Bakery.

You had been working there for a while before the owner Mr. Lee had asked if you were interested in taking over the business. Your passion for baking was evident and he was happy to sell to someone he trusted.

The transition from worker to owner was scary but you were lucky to have Stan stay on to help. To ensure your success he continued to come in weekly and hand paint his famous sugar cookies.

They were Excelsior’s signature hit, square shaped cookies covered in royal icing with Stan’s original characters intricately portrayed on them. You marveled at the detail he put into each cookie and loved hearing about the characters; each a superhero he made up for his children’s bedtime stories.

You rubbed the chill of the night from your bare arms as an Uber took you to work. Unlocking the side door you flipped the light on in the large kitchen. It was quiet for now though soon the additional baking staff would join you.

Entering your office you quickly swapped your champagne sequined tank top for a comfortable cotton Excelsior Bakery t-shirt and let your aching feet rest in a pair of casual slip-ons as you put your heels aside. Your dark jeans were normal enough to wear to work though after a long night of drinking and dancing you wished you had a pair of leggings instead.

As you were preparing the coffee you heard the side door open as the loud voices carried throughout the back of the bakery. In walked Scott, Clint and Vis, who were way too upbeat for this hour as they greeted you, hanging their coats on the wall.

“Mornin’ guys,” you replied, looking over your shoulder as you anxiously waited for the pot to finish brewing.

When the coffee was finished you couldn’t help but take the first large cup for yourself; your slightly buzzed and very exhausted body needed the caffeine immediately.

Leaning against the table you lifted the mug to your mouth and instantly the three men were stricken with laughter. After swallowing the delicious brew you quirked your head at the group, wondering what caused the sudden giggle outburst.

As you brought the cup down from your lips your fingers brushed against the culprit making your eyes widen in horror. Christine, a colleague of Nakia’s, had insisted everyone wear tacky penis necklaces, one you just realized you had forgotten to take off.

Vis’ grin peaked through the hands that covered his eyes, while Scott was keeled over laughing hysterically.

Clint wiped a tear from the corner of his eye as he proclaimed, “I’ll never let you live this one down, boss.”

Slamming the mug on the counter you quickly took the necklace off and shoved it in your pocket, opting to throw it out at home because you were wary of what these pranksters would do with it here.

Once they calmed down and Scott no longer resembled a tomato you all began preparing the fresh goods for the day. Soon all different types of breads and rolls were rising the oven, as you finished making crumb cake, turnovers and other pastries, yawning as you set them to bake.

Your baking was done but unfortunately you couldn’t rest yet, inventory still needed to be done along with some bookkeeping. A third cup of coffee sounded tempting but you needed to eat and while you loved all the delicious sweets you made you knew you wanted something more substantial.

The air was still chilly in the early morning so you asked to borrow Scott’s hoodie as you walked to the corner of the next block. You frequented this deli out of convenience, even though your rolls were a million times better. By the time you got back to Excelsior you had to set the sandwich aside to deal with a delivery.

The hazard lights were blinking on the large box truck as you held the door open for M’Baku, the even larger delivery driver, who kindly carried in your order of flour.

“Hey man,” Clint affectionately greeted him as he slipped outside with Scott following behind as their work was finished.

“Scott, wait!” He turned around just as he got to the sidewalk. “Your hoodie,” you shouted, gesturing to yourself still wearing it.

“Leave it in the lounge, I’ll pick it up tomorrow,” he yelled, sending back a smile.

Back inside Vis worked on baking cakes as you settled in your office. Scott’s hoodie hung over the back of the chair you sunk into as you unwrapped your sandwich. A knock at your door alerted your attention to Darcy, a long time employee you recently promoted to assistant manager. She informed you the latest hire Miles, had just arrived for his first day.

Leaving the sandwich again you greeted Miles, assuring that he was in good hands with Darcy and his other shift employee Kamala.

Miles’ father worked in the same precinct as your friend Wanda’s brother, becoming hooked on Excelsior from the moment Pietro brought in a box of pastries. Officer Davis stopped in for coffee and snacks quite often after that and when he saw the help wanted sign he told Miles to apply for the job.

Miles had a few questions and though Darcy was just as capable to answer them you did so yourself, showing him the same kindness Stan showed you when you began.

You returned to the sandwich and took an unsatisfying bite of cold eggs and cheese on a roll. Oh well. It sat mainly to the side as you went over some paperwork, stifling a yawn as your tired eyes drowned in the sea of words. You felt your head nodding forward in slow motion, and there was nothing you could do to prevent it. Your shoulders slumped down as you fell into a slightly uncomfortable but much needed rest.

The loud vibrations of your phone buzzing on the desk startled you awake and for a moment your sleep deprived mind needed to gather its bearings before realizing you were at work and not in your comfortable bed, the place you were desperately craving.

Yawning again you rubbed your eyes, acutely aware you might be smudging last night’s makeup all over your face. The phone buzzed once more as a reminder, and you picked it up finding a text from Wanda.

No.

Not today.

Any day but today.

You read over Wanda’s text reminding you about the blood drive over at the fire station this morning. You promised her you’d donate, knowing how important it was to her after Pietro had been shot on the job and blood transfusions helped save his life.

You wanted to go, you promised you would go, but you really didn’t want to go today. You were more than exhausted and needed rest, but realistically if you went home for a nap you would definitely sleep through your alarm. Donate blood, then sleep. That was the plan.

Vis began working on a large cake order for Stark Industries and asked your assistance in helping him gather the ingredients.

He entered the large walk in refrigerator to grab eggs and milk while you assembled the rest of what he needed on the large butcher block counters. You eyed the heavy bag of flour, ambitiously thinking you could lift it on limited sleep and drained energy.

Bending your knees you gripped the bag that seemed to fight against you, causing you to tug with more force, bringing only the half ripped top of the bag up with you as you stood. Clouds of white smoke surrounded you, with puffs of flour floating off of the fabric of your shirt with every move you made.

“This is not your day,” Vis commented from a distance.

Your unamused face turned towards him, saying nothing as you sighed and then began to cough as you choked on flour that you inhaled.

You cleaned yourself up as best as you could in the bathroom. Your dark jeans had a white-washed fade to them and your t-shirt was now rinsing in the sink. No amount of wet paper towel would have been enough to clean the shirt whose fibers engulfed the flour like it was their last meal.

Opening the bathroom door a crack you called out for Darcy, who eyed your mostly bare skin through the door with curious concern.

“Couldja get my top from the office? It should be in the bottom drawer with my heels?”

Darcy returned, admiring the sparkly top as she held it up before handing it to you.

Once you were certain your hair, face and the rest of your body was free from flour you exited the bathroom, letting Vis and Darcy know you were leaving.

“Bedtime?” Darcy asked, following you to your office.

“I wish,” you sighed, grabbing your phone. “I promised my friend Wanda I’d donate blood at the firehouse so I have to head there first.”

Darcy’s head shook with laughter as she pointed at your ensemble. “And you’re going there dressed like that?”

You grimaced as you thought about it; a sequined tank top was a bit extra for a blood drive. “Hmmm, you’re right. I think I’ll keep borrowing Scott’s hoodie until tomorrow,” you said, slipping your arms into the large sleeves and zipping it up all the way.

***

The strong morning sun blinded your eyes through the gaps of the skyscrapers as you walked to the fire station. It was going to be warm today, you could already feel yourself sweating in Scott’s hoodie. Grabbing your phone you texted Wanda letting her know you were on your way.

Ambulances were parked on the block leading up to the fire station though red balloons caught your attention; they were tied to a large plastic sign on the sidewalk promoting the blood drive. You checked your phone finding Wanda hadn’t texted back yet but you went inside anyway hoping by some chance she was already there.

Surprisingly a small crowd had built up despite the early morning hour. The room was packed with broad figured firefighters and paramedics lining the walls and medical students tending to people already in the process of donating. Volunteers were everywhere, serving juice and cookies at a table in the back and handling the registration process for the line you were in.

Wanda was not in sight so you texted her again warning that you’ll be donating soon and would need her by your side. You weren’t afraid of the needle going in but the idea of it sitting under your skin irked you and you needed her as a distraction.

After handing in your paperwork you were nervously bouncing your leg as you sat down and waited, checking your phone for the millionth disappointing time to see there was no response.

Upon hearing your name called you looked up and were greet by a very young looking kid. He introduced himself as Peter and though he looked seventeen his ID badge proved he was in fact a med student at Metro-General Hospital.

Your stomach twisted with nerves as you sat back on a cot, comfortably crossing your legs as you watched Peter slip his hands into latex gloves and slowly collect the items he needed to draw blood. He whispered to himself, methodically going through the steps of what he should be doing.

His meticulousness should have been comforting as he checked over his tools, allowing more time for Wanda to show up. Your nerves began to bubble over more as you worried if something happened to her.

The packaged needle crinkled in Peter’s hands but he was quickly stopped by a leggy brunette in a long white lab coat.

“Mr. Parker, did you check her blood pressure first?” the woman sternly asked, knowing her answer as she had been observing him and the other students from the center of the floor.

Peter cleared his throat nervously, “Oh, uh, no Ms. Hill. I’ll do that now.” He let out an uncomfortable chuckle and she nodded in return.

With the blood pressure cuff in his hand Peter wrapped it around your sleeve and began to pump the bulb. The cuff tightened around your arm and Peter was focused on reading the dial but Ms. Hill calling his name out interrupted the process.

“Mr. Parker, can you tell me what’s incorrect?”

Peter checked that he placed the cuff in the proper spot, his eyes running along your frame until he noticed his error.

“Oh, um, miss, could you uncross your legs?” he asked, throwing a hint of a smile towards Ms. Hill who turned away.

You felt bad for Peter as he resumed taking your blood pressure. You couldn’t imagine how stressful his job could be. Being covered in flour was annoying but the thought of blood and other body fluids getting all over you made you feel sick.

When it was time to finally take your blood Peter asked for your arm, giving him your left one after rolling up the sleeves. You squeezed a ball a few times before he tied off the top of your arm with a painful elastic that squeezed your skin.

“There’s g-going to be a little pinch, okay?” Peter said to gently warn you, though hearing the shakiness of his own voice did nothing to calm your nerves.

You turned your head away as Peter began, tightening your core at the intrusion of the needle that felt worse than a little pinch and tried to breathe through the mildly uncomfortable pain. The sharpness beneath your skin continued and though you didn’t look it felt like Peter was stabbing you internally as he searched for a vein.

Picturing the needle inside your arm did nothing to calm your nerves so you searched for something else to focus on since Wanda was not there. A loud burst of laughter caught your attention and you looked over to see a group huddled together.

There were two men in FDNY shirts that threatened to split at the seams across their massive muscles. They had similar looks with blond hair and beards though they were distinctly different. The shorter of the two by a few inches, had longer blond hair with a full dark beard, while the other’s facial hair was fairer though his cropped hair had a darker tinge to it.

Your face squeezed tightly in pain as Peter apologized, claiming he was having trouble with your veins.

“It’s okay,” you lied, focusing your attention back to the group.

Hunk 1 and Hunk 2 were talking to two other equally large and handsome men wearing shirts with an emergency services logo on the back. The loudest of the group was a dark man with the brightest smile you’d ever seen. His laughter was contagious as he tipped his head back, palming the shoulder of the long haired man next to him he looked to be teasing.

Hissing in pain at the sharpness you felt you couldn’t help but look at your arm, seeing the silver needle prodding your skin. You weren’t a medical professional by any means, in fact the only brush with saving lives you’ve had is when Scott once choked on a Tic-Tac and you gave him the Heimlich maneuver, but you could tell something was wrong.

“Umm, Peter,” you meekly spoke, “That doesn’t feel right.”

“Yeah, you’re right. I’m going to try the other arm, okay? I think it’s the vein,” he said, convincing himself.

He undid the elastic and you could see the difference in skin tone from where it had been cut off by the band. Withdrawing the needle from your skin, he placed a cotton ball there, applying pressure for a few minutes before he asked you to take over.

Peter grabbed a bright blue roll of a self-adherent wrap that he applied around your arm. The uncomfortable way it clung to your skin added to your ever-building nerves. Sweat pooled on the back of your neck though you found relief rolling up the other sleeve, feeling the cool air comfort you skin before the elastic wrapped around your arm again. You squeezed the ball tightly, venting all your frustrations out through every pump of your hand.

Peter opened a new needle and you caught his gaze before he began. He looked confident and so you inhaled deeply, in search once more of the hunks to distract you. They had moved closer to the refreshment table and catching your eye was the man from before, whose long chestnut hair fell in front of his face as he leaned down to grab a cup of orange juice.

When he stood up you were mesmerized by full pink lips and the brightest blue eyes you had ever seen. He was drop dead gorgeous but judging by the way he held himself it didn’t seem like he would believe you if you told him. He was the most reserved out of the group, sporting a shy smile every time Hunk 3 said something and pointed to him.

“Ow!”

You didn’t mean to shout so loud, drawing attention is the last thing you wanted. You couldn’t even bear to glance at the huddle of hunks, instead focusing on Peter who was apologizing profusely.

Reluctantly he called over Ms. Hill and she had another med student named MJ come over to have Peter observe her. She inserted the needle into your vein with ease and silently judged Peter through her side glance before leaving.

By the time you officially began donating blood you received a text from Wanda, apologizing after she was stuck on FaceTime with her mom in Sokovia for longer than she expected.

You were thankful she was alright, texting her back about your bad experience so far. You told her not to bother coming since you would be finished soon, passing the time on your phone or occasionally sneaking glances at Hunk 4; he had caught your eye the most.

It felt like you were laying there for hours as your blood flowed like sludge in a pipe. People that were seated after you were now long gone. Shifting slightly against the cot made the needle twinge inside your arm and you really couldn’t wait until this was over with. Scott’s hoodie felt like your own personal sauna and you wanted so desperately to get out of it and into pajamas.

Peter kept checking on your progress and finally when you filled the container he, with Ms. Hill shrewdly watching over his shoulder, removed the needle from your vein and placed another blue wrap around your skin.

After thanking Peter you began to walk towards the refreshment table that suddenly seemed so far away as a wave of lightheadedness washed over you. If you could just get to the juice and cookies you would be fine. You had already been here for so long you wanted to get out.

Though you were burning up your skin was clammy, and sweat beaded on your forehead but you were determined to get to the table. It was a slow trudge, like shuffling your legs through thick mud. You’re almost there. Your vision is spotty and starting to fade but if you push a little harder you could make it.

Your ears fail you as they begin to clog. A soft voice coming from the indiscernible figure beside you asks a question. It’s muffled, as if you’re underwater but you’re able to figure out what they said.

“I’m fine,” you insisted not wanting to make a scene.

The table is barely visible but you’re right there, reaching out for the cup of juice you presume is in front of you. Your hands never made it though, as your body began its descent to the ground.

***

Bright fluorescent lights were shining behind the shadowy outline that hunched over you.

“There she is,” a man said.

You blinked a few times as your vision came back fully, noticing you were lying on a cot that had been tilted so your head was down and your legs were elevated. You asked what happened as your eyes began to focus on the curtain of hair that hung in front of the figure above you. He tucked the strands behind his ears to reveal familiar blue eyes.

Oh no. Hunk 4.

“You passed out,” Hunk 4 said, “All the color was drainin’ from your face. You almost fell but I caught you in time.”

You covered your eyes with your hands out of embarrassment, hoping this was a dream. Please wake up Y/N. When you heard the hunk’s soft chuckle you knew this was unfortunately real.

“My name’s Bucky and I’m a paramedic. Is it okay if I check your vitals?”

He asked for your name and smiled when you said it. Bucky gave off a comforting vibe and even though you were incredibly embarrassed from passing out he didn’t make a big deal about it.

Beside him was a small equipment bag, those beautiful eyes made contact with your own as he dug around for a stethoscope. His lips pulled into a tender smile as he asked you to unzip your hoodie.

Inhaling deeply you looked away, too embarrassed to face him again as you exposed the sequined top that was not appropriate for a morning blood donation.

“That’s pretty,” Bucky commented, placing the end of the stethoscope above your heart. “Doesn’t match your blue bandages though.”

The laughter that floated from your lips instantly became Bucky’s favorite sound. He was drawn to the way your smile warmed your face and noticed how beautiful you were as your eyes crinkled in delight. Listening to your steady heartbeat, he was thankful you couldn’t hear the way his own had definitely skipped in rhythm.

Warmth spread throughout your body as his soft fingers pressed against your inner wrist to check your pulse. Bucky’s wide smile and twinkling eyes definitely made your heart beat faster and you hoped he couldn’t tell.

Your eyes followed the lines of his smooth skin, up his arm towards the prominent vein that spread across his bulging biceps. You regret passing out, for obvious reasons, but mainly because you missed out on what it was like to be held in those strong arms.

Bucky asked you something though you didn’t pay attention as it finally struck you, he has been staring at you at the most unflattering angle possible ever since you woke up.

“Uhh, Bucky, can I sit up now?” you practically begged.

He asked how you were feeling and no matter the truth you would have told him you were doing much better. He adjusted the cot to a sitting position and turned around, calling out a name. Suddenly Hunk 3, otherwise known as Sam, was walking towards you with a cup of juice.

“Oooh!” Sam exclaimed, taking notice of your top. “How’re you feelin’ Sparkles?” He joked a little too loudly for your liking.

“’M good, thanks,” you said, taking the cup from his hand.

Hunks 1 and 2 came over as well to check up on you and though you appreciated their concern the attention made you want to crawl into Scott’s hoodie like a turtle and never come out again. Bucky sensed your discomfort and kindly asked Sam and the other hunks to give you some space.

“Thanks. I hate making a scene,” you said, offering an appreciative smile in between sips of orange juice.

“That’s the wrong shirt to wear at a firehouse then,” he chuckled, though he was intrigued as to your choice of outfit.

Bucky’s unasked questions were answered as you explained the bachelorette party, going into details about heading straight to work, hardly eating and then leaving after the flour explosion.

“Oh, so that’s what’s on your ear!”

“What?!” you panicked, rubbing your ears with your fingers.

Bucky’s eyes crinkled tightly as laughter bubbled up from the pit of his stomach, erupting from his mouth. “I’m just kidding Y/N!”

“Don’t scare me like that!” you feigned anger through a relieved smile, “I might pass out again!” you joked.

“Yeah you just might. Why did you think it was a good idea to donate blood after a night of drinking, no sleep and not eating?”

Bucky’s question wasn’t accusatory, in fact the expression in his eyes showed just how much concern he felt for you. You began to explain Wanda and her brother, and the promise you forgot you made to donate blood today.

“That’s real sweet of ya,” he said, with the hint of a Brooklyn accent coming through. “I work the night shift a lot too so I know how easy it is to forget these things, ‘specially when you’re tired.”

“Tell me about it, I’m exhausted,” you said, covering your mouth as talking about sleep brought out a large yawn.

“I bet you are, but uh… well here’s the thing,” he rubbed the back of his neck. “Since you really didn’t eat anything today what do you say you let me take you out for breakfast?” he asked, with a hopeful smile.

Your eyes widened at his proposal and Bucky wasn’t sure if that was a positive reaction. He hadn’t asked anyone on a date in far longer than he wanted to admit and he knew he was rusty.

“As a concerned medical professional I gotta make sure you don’t pass out again,” he said, chewing on his bottom lip as he waited for your response.

A wide smile spread across your face as you accepted his offer and it felt like he could breathe again.

Bucky helped you stand, assuring that you were steady and held your hoodie up as you slipped your arms in. As you zipped yourself up he leaned over the cot, grabbing something and studying it curiously.

“Uhh… is this…” he laughed, holding out the palm of his hand to reveal the penis necklace.

They might as well take all the blood from your body since you practically died on the spot.

“This is the worst day of my life,” you deadpanned.

Bucky couldn’t help but laugh, offering his arm out for you to hold. On your way towards the door you passed by the smiling hunks with Sam smirking at you both. Bucky slapped his hand, placing the penis necklace in his palm leaving Sam very confused as the two of you walked away.

It was a quick walk to the place Bucky wanted to take you for breakfast, a trendy little spot with exposed brick and wood beams and old floors that creaked under your step. A relaxed voice from behind the counter belonging to a man with a waxed mustache told you to seat yourselves.

Leading you to a table near the window, Bucky pulled out a mismatched chair for you before he sat down. You glanced around the room, spying lights strung across the ceiling and distressed furniture repurposed as the wait stations.

Menus were brought over and reading through the details of each item made your mouth water. Your starving stomach wanted all of it as you continued to scan through every delicious offering.

“So let’s get all of it,” Bucky replied to the comment you thought you said in your head.

“What?” your head lifted to see the sincerity in Bucky’s eyes.

Though he hardly knew you, Bucky was already willing to give you the world if you asked for it.

“No! I mean, I don’t think I could eat all of it anyway. Some of it, but not all,” you joked.

Bucky’s tongue poked out to wet his lips as he chuckled. “Y/N I mean it, get whatever you want. After donating you need to indulge.”

“Paramedic’s orders?” you asked with coy glint in your eyes.

A smile cemented itself on Bucky’s face as he replied, “That’s right doll, paramedic’s orders.”

By the time your server came around you decided to order avocado toast with a fried egg along with French toast that you insisted Bucky share with you.

During the wait for food you got to know each other. Bucky was from Brooklyn where he shared an apartment with Hunk 1, otherwise known as Steve, his best friend.

“He’s a punk but I love ‘im,” Bucky said without hesitation.

You didn’t realize how long you had been smiling until your food arrived and the act of chewing hurt your sore cheeks. You couldn’t help it though, everything about Bucky made your heart sing with joy. He was handsome and kind, funny and caring. He was… disappearing from your vision as you yawned widely, covering your mouth with your hand.

You had been yawning for a while, ignoring the need for sleep to continue talking with Bucky but it was finally catching up to you.

“I’m sorry, I’ve been selfish wantin’ to talk to ya all day,” he said.

“S’okay, I really didn’t want to leave either,” you admitted, sharing a smile with him.

Before leaving you exchanged numbers. “In case you feel faint,” Bucky said, nervously running his hands through his hair.

You caught the blush on his cheeks and felt your whole body fluttering. There was no doubt you would be calling him later; it was undeniable, Bucky Barnes made you weak.

#fic

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the-queer-look · 5 years ago

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flannel scarf and glitter hairspray

Name:Adrian

Age: 25

Sexuality: Demisexual, Lesbian

Gender: Genderfluid

Occupation: Banking – postgrad english major

Location: Campsie

I like to present myself in an androgynous way. Most of my clothing is pretty masculine in the sense that I do prefer pants and a shirt for comfort reasons, but if it’s a hot day, I’ll wear a dress, and I don’t feel invalidated by that. I still enjoy slight touches of feminine influences in my life, and definitely don’t shy away from traditionally feminine colours or anything like that. I don’t use makeup, but mostly that’s because I don’t know how to use it, rather than not liking it. I’ll put on eyeliner and lipstick and be done. My girlfriend will suggest foundation or contouring, and I just say “nah I’m good” and don’t bother to learn. I have a glitter hairspray that I use to seal in my makeup on the few occasions I do try to use it, and it gives me a nice sparkle. Probably terrible for my skin though.

Growing up as a Muslim, I frequently get asked “When did you know?” in reference to being a lesbian, and when I came out to my friends I had a bit which I’d rehearsed to explain it. When I was around thirteen, this exchange student came to our school and I was very quickly drawn to her. She was very good at art, and a very cool person, which let me have the incredibly lesbian chat to myself of “I just want to be her best friend!” I remember writing specifically in my diary “I just want a best friend. Just friends, not gay.” we got really close, and I eventually came out to her, and told her that I liked her, and she was accepting of it, which was nice, and we both then had to manage our way around her realising that she was asexual, all while we were thirteen. Her being asexual wasn’t off-putting to me, I was just thirteen and didn’t know how to approach it. Hell, she didn’t know how to approach it, because she didn’t know the label for it.

After that, I began to examine the relationships I’d had with other girls all my life. When I was very young, I remember thinking to myself “I wish I was a boy” because all of the boys in my class make my friends cry, and I think that if I were a boy, I could just make them happy, if I were a boy I’d know how to be better to them. But looking back at it I just… I was so gay, and just trying to be as straight about it as possible. I thought it would be fine if I were a boy, because then I would be allowed to like the girls and they would be happy with me. I also remember sitting in a circle in school and playing a spin the bottle truth or dare game, and always getting offended if someone didnt answer the obligatory “if anyone in our class was a boy, who would you date” question with me. If I was second choice? Offended hahaha.

I feel like there wasn’t much of a change in the way I presented myself from before realising I was gay to after, because I already accidentally dressed like a stereotypical lesbian. I guess I picked up a few extra flannels? And before it was just “I like flannel” and then became “flannel makes me gay, and gay people will know that im gay, and I wear a headscarf, so I need to let other gays know that I too am gay, so I will wear a flannel over my headscarf, and that will be my signal to all the other gays that I too am in fact gay.” and it worked great.

Realising that I was genderfluid was a much more drawn out process. When I turned eighteen I started to enjoy it when people would mistake me for a boy, I was beginning to dress very androgynously, my voice is deeper than an average cis girl, y’know. After I took off my scarf and got na undercut, people would mistake me even more. I eventually went and made a facebook account using the name Adrian, a close anagram of my dead name because I wanted to have an online space where I could be me and apart from my family. But then people who I knew in real life who’d added my new profile started calling me Adrian to my face and at first I, or my girlfriend at the time would correct them, but soon I realised that I kinda liked it, and I’d like to just go by Adrian. And that started to lead me to the point where I was examining my gender, and learning about different terms for trans and intersex people, and I thought that maybe nonbinary would be cool. I thought for a long time that I might just be a trans boy, but I also really didn’t want to go through the transition process, I’ve never wanted to go on testosterone, or have top surgery, or be wholly one of the boys. I’ve always felt comfortable in the little inbetween between boys and girls, the concept of gender as a spectrum is a very positive one for me, and I like existing somewhere on that spectrum. Genderfluid feels most comfortable for me right now, I like being able to embrace both my masculine and feminine side at will, and it suits the changing nature of my personality, and I hate the idea of sticking in the box of binary gender.

I feel like my presentation changed after realising my genderfluidity. Not so much in embracing my masculinity, but instead in embracing my femininity. I had always felt like maybe I couldnt be feminine because of how llong id spent dressig in a traditionally masculine style, but after realising that I was genderfluid, I made an effort to express that side of myself, and to not be boxed in by conventions.

I feel like stereotypes can be a bit of fun I the lesbian community, like when I was just coming out and still dressing as a very muslim woman, flannels were honestly my godsend, I felt gay even though I didnt look gay, I could just have the flannel on with my scarf and identify myself to the community. But at the same time there are a lot of stereotypes that I don’t like – there’s a lot of biphobia, based on bisexuals wanting to have fun with girls, but not settle down with girls. And that sort of negative stereotype annoys me because it’s just gatekeeping at that point, by saying that you cant really be into girls if you’re also into guys. It also invalidates the experiences of everyone who had to practice compulsory heteronormativity when they were kids, because we were always told that boys being with girls was the default, and that was what we were supposed to go for. Some people’s lesbian inner voice isnt as loud as other peoples, they would have dated men, but that doesn’t make them any less gay than anyone else. I hate the idea of gold star lesbians, just because you havent slept with a man doesnt make you better than someone who doesnt. I’ve never slept with a man, but I dont feel more valid than anyone else, if anything I feel less valid because they at least have had the experience to know that they’re definitively gay. When they’re in a bit of fun, stereotypes can be fun, but when they turn that corner into something toxic, it becomes a real problem which we need to be much more vocal about criticising and removing from society.

I feel like there are more and more mainstream shows that are coming out and showing positive representations of the LGBT experience. They do lean on stereotypical looks for their characters, but I feel like thats just visual shorthand so they dont have to do a lot of work with the characters, and can just front load a lot of their personality through their outfits.

I know for a fact that the internet is and will continue to be an incredible resource for queer people, as it gives us a chance to create a safe space to explore our identities in private. I for one wouldnt have even known that lesbianism was a thing without the internet because of my sheltered upbringing.

full gallery on facebook

#genderfluid #lgbt #LGBTQIA+#gay #lesbian #demi #demisexual #photography #identity #interview #portrait #muslim #queer #pride

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hypereactive · 5 years ago

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1. Who was the last person you held hands with? my best friend

2. Are you outgoing or shy? shy

3. Who are you looking forward to seeing? my best friend

4. Are you easy to get along with? depends. i try to be, but im also REALLY picky/have strong opinions on a lot of stuff, and im autistic..

5. If you were drunk would the person you like take care of you? yeah

6. What kind of people are you attracted to? a caring one, who listens before judging

7. Do you think you’ll be in a relationship two months from now? yeah

8. Who from the opposite gender is on your mind? my best friend

9. Does talking about sex make you uncomfortable? sometimes

10. Who was the last person you had a deep conversation with? probably my best friend

11. What does the most recent text that you sent say? “o”

12. What are your 5 favorite songs right now? uhm. I like A LOT of songs.

billie ellish- bury a friend and you should see me in a crown

rag’n’bone man - human

rebel - black pearl (hes a pirate)

Aladdin soundtrack - Prince Ali and one jump ahead

arctic monkeys - Do I wanna know?

13. Do you like it when people play with your hair? rarely

14. Do you believe in luck and miracles? yea

15. What good thing happened this summer? new job, in my field of study

16. Would you kiss the last person you kissed again? yepp

17. Do you think there is life on other planets? probs at least simple life

18. Do you still talk to your first crush? only if I run into him getting coffee (he works there)

19. Do you like bubble baths? if im in the mood

20. Do you like your neighbors? one i do, one i absolutely dont, the rest i dont interact w

21. What are you bad habits? im REALLY picky, and can come off as ungrateful (if u can’t do it right id rather u just not do it. apparently its more common to think at least you got something/they tried.)

22. Where would you like to travel? Anywhere w the right people. Nowhere without.

23. Do you have trust issues? kinda. More like I understand people wont understand me or meet my needs adequately.

24. Favorite part of your daily routine? morning coffee

25. What part of your body are you most uncomfortable with? my chin/teeth

26. What do you do when you wake up? if I have ResponsibilitesTM i get up and get coffee and leave the house in less than 20 min, otherwise i lay in bed on tumblr until i have to get up due to responsibilities or hunger.

27. Do you wish your skin was lighter or darker? im good w where its at tbh

28. Who are you most comfortable around? my best friend

29. Have any of your ex’s told you they regret breaking up? yeah.

30. Do you ever want to get married? yeah

31. Is your hair long enough for a pony tail? lol yesss

32. Which celebrities would you have a threesome with? none?

33. Spell your name with your chin. bdfuds

34. Do you play sports? What sports? not really. i like frisbee and longboarding if those count.

35. Would you rather live without TV or music? TV

36. Have you ever liked someone and never told them? no. I cant keep secrets.

37. What do you say during awkward silences? i usu dont. ill just go on my phone/leave/etc

38. Describe your dream girl/guy? my best friend.

39. What are your favorite stores to shop in? hot topic

40. What do you want to do after high school? lol im not in high school

41. Do you believe everyone deserves a second chance? depends on what they did and why, and if they want to grow as a person/make it right

42. If your being extremely quiet what does it mean? im tired/overwhelmed/content/bored

43. Do you smile at strangers? if i lock eyes with them and they smiled, i might smile back, but im pretty good at Not Looking At People

44. Trip to outer space or bottom of the ocean? ocean

45. What makes you get out of bed in the morning? ResponsibilitiesTM

46. What are you paranoid about? having a heart attack and no one being around to help me/not noticing until its too late

47. Have you ever been high? yea

48. Have you ever been drunk? yea

49. Have you done anything recently that you hope nobody finds out about? no

50. What was the colour of the last hoodie you wore? black

51. Ever wished you were someone else? no, but i have wished my parents were

52. One thing you wish you could change about yourself? my chin probs. idk i like myself

53. Favourite makeup brand? i dont wear makeup

54. Favourite store? this is a duplicate question.

55. Favourite blog? uhm.

56. Favourite colour? black/grey/light pink/raspberry/celery green

57. Favourite food? cheese, cheddar brats, spinach, chocolate chip cookies, milkshakes

58. Last thing you ate? rice w beef, spinach, egg and soy sauce

59. First thing you ate this morning? coffee and nutella

60. Ever won a competition? For what? I think so but i cant remember. Oh i think I won an anti-bullying poster competition once.

61. Been suspended/expelled? For what? lol nopee

62. Been arrested? For what? no

63. Ever been in love? few times now

64. Tell us the story of your first kiss? uh. no. cuz i didnt even like the dude.

65. Are you hungry right now? no

66. Do you like your tumblr friends more than your real friends? i only have one real friend so I feel like thats unfair

67. Facebook or Twitter? tumblr.

68. Twitter or Tumblr? still tumblr

69. Are you watching tv right now? lol no

70. Names of your bestfriends? no, bc hed not appreciate it

71. Craving something? What? not rn

72. What colour are your towels? grey or floral w pinks and blacks and oranges

72. How many pillows do you sleep with? 3

73. Do you sleep with stuffed animals? yes, usu. 2

74. How many stuffed animals do you think you have? total? uh. 8?

75. Favourite animal? birbs prob.

76. What colour is your underwear? why?

77. Chocolate or Vanilla? chocolate, unless its ice cream. then vanilla

78. Favourite ice cream flavour? berry (any) or cheesecake (also any)

79. What colour shirt are you wearing? grey

80. What colour pants? a darker grey

81. Favourite tv show? uh. i like sherlock.

82. Favourite movie? deadpool probs. or pirates of the Caribbean. or Aladdin. or detective pikachu.

83. Mean Girls or Mean Girls 2? never seen either

84. Mean Girls or 21 Jump Street? never seen either

85. Favourite character from Mean Girls? n/a

86. Favourite character from Finding Nemo? uhm. I cant remember. Probs the black and white one w the scar, or the starfish, or the sea gull

87. First person you talked to today? my sister

88. Last person you talked to today? my best friend

89. Name a person you hate? my past roommate

90. Name a person you love? my best friend

91. Is there anyone you want to punch in the face right now? my past roommate and most recent ex

92. In a fight with someone? currently? no? ever? yes.

93. How many sweatpants do you have? 5

94. How many sweaters/hoodies do you have? 6

95. Last movie you watched? i dont know

96. Favourite actress? i dunno

97. Favourite actor? i dunno

98. Do you tan a lot? no

99. Have any pets? no

100. How are you feeling? i dont know

101. Do you type fast? yeah

102. Do you regret anything from your past? yeah, but not overly

103. Can you spell well? i think so

104. Do you miss anyone from your past? no

105. Ever been to a bonfire party? i dont think so, but i want to (w the right people)

106. Ever broken someone’s heart? yeah, oops

107. Have you ever been on a horse? yep

108. What should you be doing? cleaning my house

109. Is something irritating you right now? no

110. Have you ever liked someone so much it hurt? yea

111. Do you have trust issues? yea

112. Who was the last person you cried in front of? my best friend

113. What was your childhood nickname? B. as in, just the letter

114. Have you ever been out of your province/state? yea

115. Do you play the Wii? no

116. Are you listening to music right now? yea

117. Do you like chicken noodle soup? not usually

118. Do you like Chinese food? i think so

119. Favourite book? uhm. sherlock (the whole series). the uglies series (scott westerfield). the secret garden. Fahrenheit 451. 1984.

120. Are you afraid of the dark? no, but sometimes im afraid theres something in it

121. Are you mean? no

122. Is cheating ever okay? no

123. Can you keep white shoes clean? if i want to

124. Do you believe in love at first sight? no

125. Do you believe in true love? im not sure i know what this means

126. Are you currently bored? no

127. What makes you happy? i dont know

128. Would you change your name? no

129. What your zodiac sign? gemini

130. Do you like subway? i cant eat there

131. Your bestfriend of the opposite sex likes you, what do you do? lol weve been dating for a while now

132. Who’s the last person you had a deep conversation with? my best friend

133. Favourite lyrics right now? uh. I dont know.

134. Can you count to one million? that would take a month, so no.

135. Dumbest lie you ever told? i dont know. probably that i couldnt go to work bc i was “throwing up from a migraine” when i hadnt thrown up (yet).

136. Do you sleep with your doors open or closed? it varies

137. How tall are you? i think im like. 5′8″?

138. Curly or Straight hair? curly. but not consistent

139. Brunette or Blonde? i am a brunette

140. Summer or Winter? winter. i can always wear more clothes

141. Night or Day? night. its quiet and calm

142. Favourite month? august and october

143. Are you a vegetarian? no

144. Dark, milk or white chocolate? yes.

145. Tea or Coffee? yes. depends on time of day/year/mood/etc

146. Was today a good day? i dont know

147. Mars or Snickers? mars

148. What’s your favourite quote? “if you cant explain it simply, you dont understand it well enough” -einstien is one of them. but there are more

149. Do you believe in ghosts? i dont know

150. Get the closest book next to you, open it to page 42, what’s the first line on that page? “aunt lillian’s footsteps became more distant, became whispers, were gone.”

@ramblebrambleamble i got bored and answered all of them

#about me

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thathumanwiththecatears · 7 years ago

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its the night after my birthday rn as im starting to type this, and i have no idea if i will actually finish this tonight and post it or not so just for reference to see how long it takes me to talk about this its currently 1:43 am on 2/5/18 and everything id under the cut because its very long.

so, i want to talk about literally everything going on in my head about gender, and im not gonna leave anything out, not even the stuff that i would normally be really afraid to talk about on here cause i just need to put everything down in words.

I currently identify as a genderfluid person who leans more on the masculine side. and just for clarification i will say i also call myself trans, trans masc, nonbinary, and genderqueer. I discovered that i was genderfluid in 2015 and i have been happy with that label ever since, of course with the normal self questioning every genderfluid person goes through.

for kind of a while but mostly recently, i have started wondering if i am possibly also intersex. for anyone who doesnt know what that means: its when you are born with ambiguous sex traits, so that can mean a lot of things like different hormones and genitals and stuff. so apparently, most people who are born intersex dont actually know, and neither do their parents, because if there is anything physically “out of the ordinary” you could say, they will just do a surgery to fix it first.

now one thing that made me think this was the fact that i have a hormone imbalance. and i havent actually looked into anything that much to even know if that is a sign of it, but what i do know is i was told to take birth control to fix it and i can not stand how it makes me feel. It feels wrong, sometimes it almost feels like my body fights with it too and like i have more testosterone because of it trying to counteract it. again none of this is scientific, i literally dont know how this shit works and feel free to tell me i am an idiot. There are also 2 other reasons i think this but im actually rethinking the posting literally everything cause im too uncomfortable posting about those two so im gonna not talk about them, but feel free to make up your own idea if you so choose, you will probably be wrong.

things that i had before starting birth control were: hair on legs and under arms growing really fast, i smelled worse, i will say i had a stronger libido, i had long dark hairs that would grow from under my chin and neck (not extremely noticeable but they were there), some hair on my tummy, and a few hairs occasionally grew in between my tiddies, and i had a VERY messed up menstrual cycle like i very rarely had periods. there are more things but at this time i cant think of anymore. these things have all like not stopped but chilled i guess, and i almost hate it?? which is one of the things that is making me more interested in trying to go on T.

There are many things i want from T but also so many things i am afraid of. i will mention the stuff im afraid of first cause i honestly feel like that is an easier list for me to talk about. so big big one, is my hair, i am terrified to lose my hair. so much of my self confidence comes from my hair its not even funny. i rely so much on my hair. people always question if im drawing myself when i draw characters because all of them have hair extremely similar to my own, but i just love this hair, i always have, and the fact that i actually get to have this hair on my head makes me incredibly happy.

another thing im less concerned about but a bit is my voice. i know that that is like one of the main things trans guys usually want to change but i like my voice. i like how it sounds, and i like to sing. im afraid of what my voice will sound like after, im afraid i will hate it, and the thing is, that isnt reversible, if i go on T and my voice changes and i dont like it, i cant just stop T and have it go back. that is a permanent change, same with the hair. the things im most afraid of are the permanent things so im very afraid of it.

face shape changing is one thing im on the fence about, on one hand i think it would be nice, but also, i like my face shape, or at least the face shape i pretend to have in selfies, but I also use makeup to make it more masculine and i love how that looks and wish it could really look like that. Because of the fact that im genderfluid not a trans man makes it so much harder.

things i think would be fantastic though, a big one for me is getting rid of periods, and i know that can be done by other things but it is deff a huge plus to this too, you see I got really used to not having them like ever, and now i have them every month, and i cant stand it. this is also gonna be really gross but whatever, i dont even like, do anything sometimes. i will just free bleed, if im home, if im wearing one of the pairs of pajama pants that i know always wash out all the blood then i just dont bother with anything, i have a short and not too heavy period so i dont even ever bleed completely through the pants either, so it just kinda works. its just so annoying and i hate that i have to deal with it now.

another thing is weird to some but body hair growth, some people hate it but i kinda like it sometimes, and if i decide i dont i can just shave it off and everything is great. also beards, i love beards, and judging by my family and the fact that my face tries to grow hairs without T tells me i can deff grow one. and again if i decide i dont want it i can just shave it off.

body fat migration, to make me have a less feminine body, and muscle growth, are both things that on my fat ass body i dont think would make too much of a difference quite honestly, but would i be pumped to look less feminine and be able to get more muscle if i actually worked out? HELL YEAH. and im just gonna slip this lil thing in here i like the idea of the uh,,, growth, that happens else where but just my body changing like that makes me happy, i know for a fact that i want to get my chest removed because its extremely annoying and gives me dysphoria, and quite honestly my tits are fucking ugly, i dont care how body positive i want to be and how i support any other person with large breasts, mine are so fucking ugly i have hated them since they grew in.

there are a ton of tiny things too that change that i want and like also just the fact of having those hormones in my body would make me feel normal. estrogen doesnt make me feel right. it makes me feel like something is wrong with me, and like i have taken away a part of myself. i dont know how to describe it, but that “hormone imbalance” felt more “right” to me than this. i feel like im messed up now.

im just conflicted. I want to be happy, I want to feel okay in my body, but right now i dont, and i also dont know if being on T would fix it, or give me irreversible side effects that i can never fix and leave me feeling the same way. I honestly just feel like i would be better with my “imbalance” cause that was the most normal i have felt. but apparently thats not “healthy”

literally like the main thing here is im not a trans man, and im not a cis woman, and yeah i lean more on masculine, but will i regret doing things to my body that actually make me physically closer to being male. i dont know, and there is no way to find out without really regretting it. but im just not happy how i currently am either, so it just makes it so hard. there is like no way for me to be happy like this, i just dont even want to have a human body, i would rather exist as just a formless entity that has no male or female traits.

this post didnt even help me figure stuff out. im still just as confused. I just want to be able to live as a man but keep my voice and hair, if i could do that i think i would be 100% ready to go on T. and these are such petty things and i feel so bad about being caught up on them cause trans men talk about how they are afraid to lose their hair but say how its worth it to them. and i feel so bad that i dont know if it is worth it for me. like i dont deserve to transition if i dont think its worth it.

it has been an hour now. and i think im done now. but i might post about this again.

#personal #genderfluid #trans masc

1 note · View note

rockformed · 7 years ago

Note

1-100 for that ask thing. Cuz fuck you

JESUS CHRIST WILLim putting this under a read more fuck you too

Spotify, SoundCloud, or Pandora?

soundcloud!!

is your room messy or clean?

always messy, last time it was clean was when we first moved in lmao

what color are your eyes?

very dark brown

do you like your name? why?

i do!! cause it means “helper”!! and i love to help vv

what is your relationship status?

single as fuck, ive never been in a relationship ;;

describe your personality in 3 words or less

shy, creative, and passive

what color hair do you have?

natural redhead babeyyyy

what kind of car do you drive? color?

i dont drive ;;

where do you shop?

usually i get my clothes from a place called torrid, they sell plus sized stuff!! but i get all my t-shirts from redbubble and thinkgeek!

how would you describe your style?

all over the place lmao, messy

favorite social media account

tumblr is m fav just cause the site works the way i think it should, in chronological order

what size bed do you have?

double

any siblings?

yep!! 2 step brothers, 1 half brother and 1 half sister

if you can live anywhere in the world where would it be? why?

a small cabin on a riverside with self-sustainability. i just dont wanna have to worry about stuff and be left to myself in a cute little cabin!!

favorite snapchat filter?

THE TIGER FACEMASK ONE

favorite makeup brand(s)

dont wear makeup :p

how many times a week do you shower?

i uhhhhh try to shower once every day but i have a hard time remembering a lot ;;

favorite tv show?

atm i dont have one, i dont really watch tv! im excited for the return of steven universe tho

shoe size?

8 womens

how tall are you?

5′3″ last time i checked!!

sandals or sneakers?

SNEAKERS, i hate sandals :(

do you go to the gym?

used to every day, stopped cause we moved away from my gym and i have no way to get there :(

describe your dream date

oh gosh, i dont really know, something chill where i could get to know the person a bit, maybe lunch at a cute airy restaurant vv

how much money do you have in your wallet at the moment?

i have misc change and a 15 dollar red lobster gift card lol

what color socks are you wearing?

im not wearing any!!

how many pillows do you sleep with?

3, and many stuffed animals :3

do you have a job? what do you do?

i do commissions, but i dont have a 9-5 “job” yet

how many friends do you have?

oh gosh, uuummmm 2 really good ones, maybe 7 others?? im probably forgetting ;;

whats the worst thing you have ever done?

when i was 5 i stole a harmonica from a cracker barrel and swore on the bible that the woman at the counter let me have it ;;;;; it haunts me everyday for real

whats your favorite candle scent?

i dont have a specific, but i love sweet scented candles, and holiday ones :p

3 favorite boy names

Ben, Oliver, and Andrew

3 favorite girl names

Lily, Genevieve, and Lorelei

favorite actor?

Robin Williams %100 forever

favorite actress?

amy adams

who is your celebrity crush?

Chris Pratt i guess??? i dont pay too much attention to that stuff :p

favorite movie?

ever, is wreck it ralph, atm is beauty and the beast (not the remake)

do you read a lot? whats your favorite book?

i dont read too much anymore, but my favorite book(s) is the Doll People by Ann M. Martin.

money or brains?

brains if by brains you include personality

do you have a nickname? what is it?

a lot of people on here call me Rock, but i dont have a real life nickname!!

how many times have you been to the hospital?

one, when i was born lmao

top 10 favorite songs

GOD fuck umm, Overwhelming by Jon Bellion, Fiddle and the Drum by Perfect Circle, 24 Karat Magic by Bruno Mars, Ticker Tape by Gorillaz, Separate Ways by Journey, I Believe in a Thing Called Love by The Darkness, Beautiful Girls by Sean Kingston (i know, i know), Kill Your Heroes by AWOLNATION, Clocks by Coldplay, and Hide and Seek by Imogen Heap.

do you take any medications daily?

nope!!

what is your skin type? (oily, dry, etc)

soft vv cause i drink so much fuckin water lmao

what is your biggest fear?

uhhh my loved ones dying and not knowing if i’d be okay if they did??

how many kids do you want?

NONE

whats your go to hair style?

natural i guess, i dont really do up my hair :0

what type of house do you live in? (big, small, etc)

ideally, id love one of those micro-houses and to travel the country with my house, but if that doesnt work out id like a shotgun style!

who is your role model?

Robin Williams, again :p

what was the last compliment you received?

“i love the way you color” was the last one!!

what was the last text you sent?

“my feet are gonna fall the fuck off” sent to my mom sjhdfjhdjfs

how old were you when you found out santa wasn’t real?

i didnt grow up believing in santa, my mom always just wrote her name on my presents!

what is your dream car?

a tucker, even tho thats very VERY unlikely lmao

opinion on smoking?

dont do it

do you go to college?

no, but i want to!!

what is your dream job?

character/concept designer for a film or game studio

would you rather live in rural areas or the suburbs?

rural!!

do you take shampoo and conditioner bottles from hotels?

no >:(

do you have freckles?

lots on my arms, none on my face anymore :p

do you smile for pictures?

yep!! i have a bad sameface problem lmao

how many pictures do you have on your phone?

100+, my phone doesnt tell me an exact number

have you ever peed in the woods?

yep, once when i was younger i got locked out of my house on the way home from school so i had to pee in the woods behind our house and wait for my mom to get home

do you still watch cartoons?

yeah, its the only thing i really watch lol

do you prefer chicken nuggets from Wendy’s or McDonalds?

Wendys, but Mcdonalds has better fries

Favorite dipping sauce?

sweet BBQ

what do you wear to bed?

sweatpants and a t-shirt!

have you ever won a spelling bee?

no, but i one a book fair contest once!

what are your hobbies?

drawing, singing, music in general, video games, and seeing how long i can stay up without passing out lmao

can you draw?

i like to think so

do you play an instrument?

flute, but i think ive forgotten how by now

what was the last concert you saw?

i havent seen any, but im going to see one next week!!

tea or coffee?

neither, unless we’re talking sweet tea lmao

Starbucks or Dunkin Donuts?

AMERICA RUNS ON DUNKIN YOU FOOL

do you want to get married?

yes, id like to!! but if the person i end up with doesnt want to im cool with that!

what is your crush’s first and last initial?

im not answering this fkdjgghjdhf

are you going to change your last name when you get married?

depends on the other persons last name and if they wanna change theirs!!

what color looks best on you?

green!

do you miss anyone right now?

yeah, a friend of mine and my dad :(

do you sleep with your door open or closed?

closed and locked lol

do you believe in ghosts?

somewhat

what is your biggest pet peeve?

when people are rude or self-absorbed ://

last person you called`

my mom

favorite ice cream flavor?

cookie dough!!

regular oreos or golden oreos?

regular (put them in the fridge first, they’re better cold!!)

chocolate or rainbow sprinkles?

i hate sprinkles :p tastes like paste

what shirt are you wearing?

a fallout t-shirt!

what is your phone background?

cinderella’s castle, a pick that i took last time i went to magic kingdom!!

are you outgoing or shy?

shy :3c

do you like it when people play with your hair?

yeah!! but only if i know them fkhgdfg

do you like your neighbors?

some of them, our neighbor to our right is really nice but past that we have two trump supporters and on the left we have a couple thats really really mean lmao

do you wash your face? at night? in the morning?

in the morning!!

have you ever been high?

nope

have you ever been drunk?

nope

last thing you ate?

a subway sandwich!!

favorite lyrics right now

???

summer or winter?

WINTER PLS

day or night?

Day, specifially mornings :o

dark, milk, or white chocolate?

milk!!

favorite month?

december :)

what is your zodiac sign

cancer!!!

who was the last person you cried in front of?

uhhhh my therapist lmao

FUCK YOU WILL THIS TOOK ME AN HOUR

#idontknowhowtorespondtothis #about me #hfjghjhawhdgbhjsgdfgs

5 notes · View notes

leppardbowie · 7 years ago

Note

1 - 150 ;)

HOW DARE YOU DO THIS lmaoo *putting away spork * lets do this hahah

1. Who was the last person you held hands with? Lmao no one2. Are you outgoing or shy? *hides in shame cube* very very very shy3. Who are you looking forward to seeing? I dont know anyone atm but I guess my dad lol4. Are you easy to get along with? Yah sure :p5. If you were drunk would the person you like take care of you? im not with anyone so lmao6. What kind of people are you attracted to? Idk if yeh mean personality wise , looks wise ? but ill say people who say what they mean and mean what they say people who don’t say sorry just bc someone was “offended” lmao and people who dont really give a damn lol7. Do you think you’ll be in a relationship two months from now? erm my mom says no8. Who from the opposite gender is on your mind? Jerry lewis9. Does talking about sex make you uncomfortable? Yes10. Who was the last person you had a deep conversation with? mermy11. What does the most recent text that you sent say? “googled it”12. What are your 5 favorite songs right now? 1. dont you forget about me billy idol 2. Is this love Bob marley 3. Blue highway billy idol 4. Crackerbox palace george harrison 5. harlem shuffle rolling stones13. Do you like it when people play with your hair? nein 14. Do you believe in luck and miracles? Yesh :p 15. What good thing happened this summer? um lmao nothing happened this summer 16. Would you kiss the last person you kissed again? Ive never been kissed17. Do you think there is life on other planets? YEAS18. Do you still talk to your first crush? ive never had a crush so....19. Do you like bubble baths? Yah :p20. Do you like your neighbors? NEIN21. What are you bad habits? ?!?!? idk lmao probably hating people too much22. Where would you like to travel? Trinidad 23. Do you have trust issues? eh 24. Favorite part of your daily routine? Crocheting25. What part of your body are you most uncomfortable with? I like all of me 26. What do you do when you wake up? stare into the void27. Do you wish your skin was lighter or darker? Naaaaahhhhhh I like my complexion lol28. Who are you most comfortable around? my mom 29. Have any of your ex’s told you they regret breaking up? Ive never ha any exes30. Do you ever want to get married? Yeah :p31. If your hair long enough for a pony tail? No lmao32. Which celebrities would you have a threesome with? eww 33. Spell your name with your chin.c hgyz n ndcf34. Do you play sports? What sports? Swimming :D 35. Would you rather live without TV or music? Tv Ive not seen television in 7 years36. Have you ever liked someone and never told them? Ive never liked anyone irl lmao37. What do you say during awkward silences? lol i laugh38. Describe your dream girl/guy? hmm I like all kinds of people so I guess just eccentric weirdos :p39. What are your favorite stores to shop in? converse and target :p40. What do you want to do after high school? work in the medical feel41. Do you believe everyone deserves a second chance? not everybodyyyyyyyy now42. If your being extremely quiet what does it mean? either you have offended me in someway or im holding back the urge to strangle you43. Do you smile at strangers? sometimes44. Trip to outer space or bottom of the ocean? OCEANNNNN :p45. What makes you get out of bed in the morning? the joy of life46. What are you paranoid about? aint worried bout nuttin47. Have you ever been high? no48. Have you ever been drunk?np49. Have you done anything recently that you hope nobody finds out about?no50. What was the colour of the last hoodie you wore? not really a hoddie but lmao ? turqouis jacket thing 51. Ever wished you were someone else? no52. One thing you wish you could change about yourself? my brain function53. Favourite makeup brand? dont have one54. Favourite store?dont have one55. Favourite blog?dont have one56. Favourite colour? RAINBOWWWWWWW57. Favourite food? tamales orrr carne asada58. Last thing you ate? noodles59. First thing you ate this morning? a lolipop :p60. Ever won a competition? For what? blue ribbon for swimming 61. Been suspended/expelled? For what? Nerp62. Been arrested? For what? No 63. Ever been in love? no64. Tell us the story of your first kiss? havent had it yet65. Are you hungry right now? yah lmao66. Do you like your tumblr friends more than your real friends? I dont have any friends irl 0_067. Facebook or Twitter? neither i dont even have facebook lmao68. Twitter or Tumblr? id glady delete both rn for a good sum of money69. Are you watching tv right now? I dont have a tv70. Names of your bestfriends? ?!?!? no friends irl but I mean tumblr wise @Bowieakajohn i talk to her alot71. Craving something? What? pizza72. What colour are your towels? dont have any lol 72. How many pillows do you sleep with? 173. Do you sleep with stuffed animals?174. How many stuffed animals do you think you have? used to have tons now i have like 3 :’075. Favourite animal? rodents76. What colour is your underwear? bleck77. Chocolate or Vanilla? vanillerrrrrr78. Favourite ice cream flavour? hmm :p I dont like ice cream that much butttt pistacio 79. What colour shirt are you wearing? not wearing a shirt haha80. What colour pants? black81. Favourite tv show? havent watched tv in yearsss 82. Favourite movie? Sgt. Pepper's Lonely Hearts Club Band 197883. Mean Girls or Mean Girls 2? Ive never seen that dingy movie84. Mean Girls or 21 Jump Street? neither lmao85. Favourite character from Mean Girls? I dont know any of them86. Favourite character from Finding Nemo? darla87. First person you talked to today? mommy :p88. Last person you talked to today? mommy :p89. Name a person you hate? nobody ahha90. Name a person you love? mommy91. Is there anyone you want to punch in the face right now? *triggered*92. In a fight with someone? no93. How many sweatpants do you have? none94. How many sweaters/hoodies do you have? none95. Last movie you watched? *chokes* did not finish but arizona dream eww holy jesus ew96. Favourite actress? none97. Favourite actor? Eddie redmayne , jake gyllenhal , jerry lewis , hugh jackman , christian bale , john hurt :p98. Do you tan a lot? never have never will99. Have any pets? Yas my bby guinea100. How are you feeling? aight101. Do you type fast? eh102. Do you regret anything from your past? eh eh eh yeh103. Can you spell well? Yah :p104. Do you miss anyone from your past? ehhhh not really105. Ever been to a bonfire party? no106. Ever broken someone’s heart? ?!? idk107. Have you ever been on a horse? no but I have pet a christmas show horse108. What should you be doing? chemistry109. Is something irritating you right now? nah110. Have you ever liked someone so much it hurt? no111. Do you have trust issues? didnt you ask this already ?112. Who was the last person you cried in front of? noone113. What was your childhood nickname? mommanoma (still is)114. Have you ever been out of your province/state? Yah :p115. Do you play the Wii? np116. Are you listening to music right now? in my head yeh irl no117. Do you like chicken noodle soup? yesh :p118. Do you like Chinese food? yeah119. Favourite book? immortal city120. Are you afraid of the dark? no121. Are you mean? sometimes :o but i try to be nice okay i try122. Is cheating ever okay? no123. Can you keep white shoes clean? never had white shoes124. Do you believe in love at first sight? ?!?!?125. Do you believe in true love? ?!?!?126. Are you currently bored? yeh127. What makes you happy? life :D 128. Would you change your name? no lol129. What your zodiac sign? scorpio130. Do you like subway? yeah had subway todat lol131. Your bestfriend of the opposite sex likes you, what do you do? lol if i liked em back cool :p132. Who’s the last person you had a deep conversation with? nerbedy133. Favourite lyrics right now? cant think lmao134. Can you count to one million? no lmao my brain short circuts at 65135. Dumbest lie you ever told? idk136. Do you sleep with your doors open or closed? locked137. How tall are you? 6″2138. Curly or Straight hair? my natural hair is an afro lol139. Brunette or Blonde? neither lmao redhead140. Summer or Winter? winterrrrrrr141. Night or Day? day142. Favourite month? november143. Are you a vegetarian? no144. Dark, milk or white chocolate? milky :p145. Tea or Coffee? Both :D146. Was today a good day? yeah147. Mars or Snickers? SNICKERSSSSSSSS148. What’s your favourite quote? “not a chance , not a snowflakes chance in hell” - david bowie149. Do you believe in ghosts? yeh :p150. Get the closest book next to you, open it to page 42, what’s the first line on that page?” I turn with the warm ador of a friend to those who have nobody “

WHY YOU DO DIS @bowieakajohn Y Lmaoooo

2 notes · View notes

santafe1899-blog · 7 years ago

Note

ykno what nvm answer all of them dickhead

fuck u

1. Who was the last person you held hands with?

2. Are you outgoing or shy?

outgoin

3. Who are you looking forward to seeing?

i see every1 i love p frequently tbh

4. Are you easy to get along with?

i reckon so

5. If you were drunk would the person you like take care of you?

yeah i trust em to (if they aint all drunk themselves)

6. What kind of people are you attracted to?

like 80% of the population

7. Do you think you’ll be in a relationship two months from now?

i reckon i got p good odds tbh

8. Who from the opposite gender is on your mind?

uhh helena cuz she just gave me a hug bless her

9. Does talking about sex make you uncomfortable?

yes. deeply.

10. Who was the last person you had a deep conversation with?

11. What does the most recent text that you sent say?

‘love u mom’

12. What are your 5 favorite songs right now?

choose any from this

13. Do you like it when people play with your hair?

f u c k y e s

14. Do you believe in luck and miracles?

ehhhh idk not rly

15. What good thing happened this summer?

so much?? bfs?? top surgery??? its been a good summer

16. Would you kiss the last person you kissed again?

give me

17. Do you think there is life on other planets?

al wouldnt be cuddling me rn if i didnt

18. Do you still talk to your first crush?

i dont even remember his name

19. Do you like bubble baths?

i dont have them often but theyre cool

20. Do you like your neighbors?

yeah theyre chill

21. What are you bad habits?

o god so many. drinkin paint waters prolly the worst one

22. Where would you like to travel?

santa fe

23. Do you have trust issues?

uhh nah

24. Favorite part of your daily routine?

talkin 2 the ppl i love

25. What part of your body are you most uncomfortable with?

well itll b GONE in 5 days SOO

26. What do you do when you wake up?

go back 2 sleep

27. Do you wish your skin was lighter or darker?

nah

28. Who are you most comfortable around?

the bfs

29. Have any of your ex’s told you they regret breaking up?

uhh nah

30. Do you ever want to get married?

howd that even work

31. Is your hair long enough for a pony tail?

we just tested n Yes

32. Which celebrities would you have a threesome with?

there r so many options wtf…the richest 2

33. Spell your name with your chin.

mjnac mjk

34. Do you play sports? What sports?

soccer 4 lyfe (im a forward)

35. Would you rather live without TV or music?

y would u ask me this

36. Have you ever liked someone and never told them?

im shit at that tbh i always end up spillin. prolly my elementary school crush cuz i got over it in a week

37. What do you say during awkward silences?

i usually awkward laugh

38. Describe your dream girl/guy?

uhhh… im tryina think a the similarities btwn the bfs…uhh…nice smile

39. What are your favorite stores to shop in?

somewhere w food

40. What do you want to do after high school?

art

41. Do you believe everyone deserves a second chance?

nope

42. If your being extremely quiet what does it mean?

m concentratin

43. Do you smile at strangers?

sometimes?

44. Trip to outer space or bottom of the ocean?

outer space

45. What makes you get out of bed in the morning?

food. promise a seein the bfs

46. What are you paranoid about?

uhhh losin people

47. Have you ever been high?

yep

48. Have you ever been drunk?

yep

49. Have you done anything recently that you hope nobody finds out about?

dont think so

50. What was the colour of the last hoodie you wore?

navy blu

51. Ever wished you were someone else?

yeahh

52. One thing you wish you could change about yourself?

i mean… appearance wise its already changin. but i reckon i cld prolly be less brash

53. Favourite makeup brand?

uhhhh idek know more than 2 makeup brands

54. Favourite store?

food

55. Favourite blog?

mine. uh jk like…the bfs? idk i only rly follow my friends n art blogs

56. Favourite colour?

blue

57. Favourite food?

mac n cheese

58. Last thing you ate?

a bagel

59. First thing you ate this morning?

pancakes

60. Ever won a competition? For what?

i won like 10 art competitions in elementary

61. Been suspended/expelled? For what?

bein a little shit once

62. Been arrested? For what?

vandalism rip

63. Ever been in love?

yeah i am rn

64. Tell us the story of your first kiss?

wed been datin for a month. we kissed then we both laughed

65. Are you hungry right now?

when aint i

66. Do you like your tumblr friends more than your real friends?

theyre the same

67. Facebook or Twitter?

uhh twitter

68. Twitter or Tumblr?

tumblr

69. Are you watching tv right now?

nah

70. Names of your bestfriends?

medda, crutchie, albo, spot, davey, kath

71. Craving something? What?

when isnt it mac n cheese

72. What colour are your towels?

like… a few diff ones

72. How many pillows do you sleep with?

73. Do you sleep with stuffed animals?

nah

74. How many stuffed animals do you think you have?

uhh like…1? i didnt get 2 bring my childhood ones n i aint the kinda person 2 collect em

75. Favourite animal?

dogs tbh

76. What colour is your underwear?

black rn

77. Chocolate or Vanilla?

chocolate

78. Favourite ice cream flavour?

cookies n cream

79. What colour shirt are you wearing?

blue

80. What colour pants?

grey

81. Favourite tv show?

b99

82. Favourite movie?

hot fuzz

83. Mean Girls or Mean Girls 2?

mean girls??? obv??? mean girls 2 was shit we all know that

84. Mean Girls or 21 Jump Street?

mean girls

85. Favourite character from Mean Girls?

janis

86. Favourite character from Finding Nemo?

nemo for sure

87. First person you talked to today?

crutchie

88. Last person you talked to today?

89. Name a person you hate?

90. Name a person you love?

you

91. Is there anyone you want to punch in the face right now?

yeah a lot

92. In a fight with someone?

not actively

93. How many sweatpants do you have?

too many (never too many)

94. How many sweaters/hoodies do you have?

prolly like..3

95. Last movie you watched?

spirit

96. Favourite actress?

m e d d a

97. Favourite actor?

idk a hot one

98. Do you tan a lot?

i tend 2 burn more

99. Have any pets?

theo

100. How are you feeling?

gay

101. Do you type fast?

moderately?

102. Do you regret anything from your past?

yeeeeah

103. Can you spell well?

im ok

104. Do you miss anyone from your past?

yeah

105. Ever been to a bonfire party?

fuck yeah

106. Ever broken someone’s heart?

uhh … yeah

107. Have you ever been on a horse?

yeah

108. What should you be doing?

payin attention 2 al

109. Is something irritating you right now?

yeah im hangin out w this rlly annoyin guy rn :/

110. Have you ever liked someone so much it hurt?

yeah.

111. Do you have trust issues?

not rly

112. Who was the last person you cried in front of?

uhh theo

113. What was your childhood nickname?

id rly rather Not

114. Have you ever been out of your province/state?

yeah

115. Do you play the Wii?

i mean sometimes but we dont got one

116. Are you listening to music right now?

yeah we have a playlist on

117. Do you like chicken noodle soup?

yeah

118. Do you like Chinese food?

yeah

119. Favourite book?

football

120. Are you afraid of the dark?

as much as like, ny1 is

121. Are you mean?

sometimes?

122. Is cheating ever okay?

absolutely not

123. Can you keep white shoes clean?

nope

124. Do you believe in love at first sight?

nah, just lust

125. Do you believe in true love?

yeah

126. Are you currently bored?

nah

127. What makes you happy?

theo, paintin, the bfs, medda

128. Would you change your name?

been there done that

129. What your zodiac sign?

cancer

130. Do you like subway?

yeah sure

131. Your bestfriend of the opposite sex likes you, what do you do?

“we did this already”

132. Who’s the last person you had a deep conversation with?

133. Favourite lyrics right now?

tbh ‘cause I’m never going down, im never giving up, im never gonna leave, so put your hands up, if you like me, then say you like me.’ mean a lot rn

134. Can you count to one million?

i mean…probably?

135. Dumbest lie you ever told?

“im straight”

136. Do you sleep with your doors open or closed?

closed

137. How tall are you?

5’10”

138. Curly or Straight hair?

i got str8 hair

139. Brunette or Blonde?

brunette by majority rules

140. Summer or Winter?

summer

141. Night or Day?

day

142. Favourite month?

july. 4 no reason…..

143. Are you a vegetarian?

nope

144. Dark, milk or white chocolate?

milk

145. Tea or Coffee?

ughh tea if i have 2. just give me a red bull

146. Was today a good day?

yeah

147. Mars or Snickers?

mars

148. What’s your favourite quote?

“it does not do to dwell on dreams and forget to live”

149. Do you believe in ghosts?

yeah sure

150. Get the closest book next to you, open it to page 42, what’s the first line on that page?

“Well – I don’ like sayin’ the name if I can help it. No one does.”

#muckity-mucks

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eggroll-sushi · 8 years ago

Note

1-150 ask mem

first of all, fuc k yoou

1. Who was the last person you held hands with?

my mom??

2. Are you outgoing or shy?

outgoing around friends

3. Who are you looking forward to seeing?

4. Are you easy to get along with?

i dont know, ive heard that no one really hates me but like i find it difficult to find someone who i actually enjoy talking to

5. If you were drunk would the person you like take care of you?

i dont really have any interest in anyone rn so... yes? id take care of myself

6. What kind of people are you attracted to?

so far everyone that ive liked is a either a nerd or a pretty shitty person so like ,

7. Do you think you’ll be in a relationship two months from now?

8. Who from the opposite gender is on your mind?

in what way?? idk im still thinking of this oe guy he had his pants pulled up pretty high with a tight belt on and a big nose. im not thinking in a romantic way or anything i just... it was a weird combination. . ..his hair was ok i guess

9. Does talking about sex make you uncomfortable?

uh yeah if its not in the brash or crude humor way

10. Who was the last person you had a deep conversation with?

you

11. What does the most recent text that you sent say?

“probably”

12. What are your 5 favorite songs right now?

killer - bastille, yeah i dont have any others that stand out particularly

13. Do you like it when people play with your hair?

i have curly hair so we just both suffer if they try running their hands through... but if i had a romantic s/o i probably wouldnt mind bein petted

14. Do you believe in luck and miracles?

yes? i think so

15. What good thing happened this summer?

i hung out with friends a lot.. .i think i dont remember

16. Would you kiss the last person you kissed again?

yeah i lovemy mom

17. Do you think there is life on other planets?

scary either way.. but the universe is pretty big so i guess

18. Do you still talk to your first crush?

not really theyre an asshole mostly

19. Do you like bubble baths?

i havent taken a bath in like 4 years.. but yes

20. Do you like your neighbors?

we do not talk

21. What are you bad habits?

being rude and disrespectful and aggressive

22. Where would you like to travel?

europe.. japan.. idk

23. Do you have trust issues?

24. Favorite part of your daily routine?

sleeping and eating

25. What part of your body are you most uncomfortable with?

i really dont know.. its like an all around tie.. .

26. What do you do when you wake up?

brush teeth and wash face, change into outside wear if im going outside, lotion my face and put on mascara, make tea/breakfast

27. Do you wish your skin was lighter or darker?

overall just smoother.. like a more even tone.. but darker i guess

28. Who are you most comfortable around?

y ou

29. Have any of your ex’s told you they regret breaking up?

ive dated.. once but i didn’t even like the guy.. i just said yes because it was like. .mmkfkucin 5th grade and then he broke up with me (i didnt care tbh) and then asked me back?? it was weird because he told me he was breaking up because he found.. someone hotter or something and they said if he dumped me they would date him and they didnt.. .it was wild tbh i dont really know why they did this it was like 6th grade. ......... ... .anyways

30. Do you ever want to get married?

theoretically, yes? but idk it seems exhausting and i cant grasp the concept of someone actually liking me for so long

31. Is your hair long enough for a pony tail?

yes

32. Which celebrities would you have a threesome with?

fuck i dont know i dont really think about that buds

33. Spell your name with your chin.

gthhju-asnhhy

34. Do you play sports? What sports?

no unless robotics counts

35. Would you rather live without TV or music?

36. Have you ever liked someone and never told them?

yes

37. What do you say during awkward silences?

i just try to do something funny

38. Describe your dream girl/guy?

nice, a kind person, likeable, liberal, ,

39. What are your favorite stores to shop in?

tjmaxx, marshalls, burlington. i go stright to that mf clearance section

40. What do you want to do after high school?

perferably die, but thats unlikely so i wanna go into a good college, make friends, get a decent job

41. Do you believe everyone deserves a second chance?

my mind says yes but my heart says no

42. If you’re being extremely quiet what does it mean?

1) tired 2) mad 3) i cant/dont wanna make conversation 4) im just .. zoned out

43. Do you smile at strangers?

if they smile first

44. Trip to outer space or bottom of the ocean?

im fucking terrified of both

45. What makes you get out of bed in the morning?

i have to go to school or i feel like shit

46. What are you paranoid about?

every time im disrespectful, aggressive, or really any action that i make

47. Have you ever been high?

48. Have you ever been drunk?

49. Have you done anything recently that you hope nobody finds out about?

sure

50. What was the colour of the last hoodie you wore?

it was a brownish orange (a coat with a hood)

51. Ever wished you were someone else?

52. One thing you wish you could change about yourself?

give myself a massive sponge dick

53. Favourite makeup brand?

i dont really wear makeup.. i like ChapStick

54. Favourite store?

tjmaxx

55. Favourite blog?

@eggroll-sushi

56. Favourite colour?

orange? either a peachy orange or a borwnish orange. but i can appreciate a good palette

57. Favourite food?

id say pho but i like a lot of foods

58. Last thing you ate?

oreos and milk

59. First thing you ate this morning?

blueberry english muffin with honey butter

60. Ever won a competition? For what?

recently my team won a robotics comp

61. Been suspended/expelled? For what?

62. Been arrested? For what?

jesus no

63. Ever been in love?

64. Tell us the story of your first kiss?

well ... my mo was telling me goonight-- (i havent had one)

65. Are you hungry right now?

yeah

66. Do you like your tumblr friends more than your real friends?

my tungle friends are also my irl friends

67. Facebook or Twitter?

twitter (i dont use either)

68. Twitter or Tumblr?

tumblr? i hate it tho

69. Are you watching tv right now?

n o

70. Names of your bestfriends?

you know who

71. Craving something? What?

food.. savory junk food........olives, nachos, ,,

72. What colour are your towels?

white

72. How many pillows do you sleep with?

two, but i have 3 on my bed

73. Do you sleep with stuffed animals?

i just keep em on my bed yeah

74. How many stuffed animals do you think you have?

4 on my bed (god bless your soul, okoshi, wherever you are) but like.. 10 total?

75. Favourite animal?

cat but i also like most animals

76. What colour is your underwear?

its currently gray

77. Chocolate or Vanilla?

dark chocolate

78. Favourite ice cream flavour?

blue moon

79. What colour shirt are you wearing?

black with white text

80. What colour pants?

shades of gray

81. Favourite tv show?

su? i dont really watch any others

82. Favourite movie?

the man from uncle movie/ kingsman

83. Mean Girls or Mean Girls 2?

mean girls?

84. Mean Girls or 21 Jump Street?

mean girls i guess

85. Favourite character from Mean Girls?

idk

86. Favourite character from Finding Nemo?

starfish

87. First person you talked to today?

mom

88. Last person you talked to today?

you

89. Name a person you hate?

protein shake (jk)

90. Name a person you love?

my mother

91. Is there anyone you want to punch in the face right now?

maybe

92. In a fight with someone?

im constantly in a fight

93. How many sweatpants do you have?

one

94. How many sweaters/hoodies do you have?

many, over 10

95. Last movie you watched?

Logan

96. Favourite actress?

janelle monae always looks stunning

97. Favourite actor?

uhhhhhhhhh dwayne is a friend

98. Do you tan a lot?

yes?

99. Have any pets?

100. How are you feeling?

sick

101. Do you type fast?

not really

102. Do you regret anything from your past?

yes

103. Can you spell well?

yeah i guess

104. Do you miss anyone from your past?

yeah i suppose

105. Ever been to a bonfire party?

i went on a camping enrichment?

106. Ever broken someone’s heart?

no?

107. Have you ever been on a horse?

yeah

108. What should you be doing?

studying for histry quiz

109. Is something irritating you right now?

yes

110. Have you ever liked someone so much it hurt?

no?

111. Do you have trust issues?

im pretty sure this was already asked

112. Who was the last person you cried in front of?

mom?

113. What was your childhood nickname?

ass (im still a kid, right?)

114. Have you ever been out of your province/state?

yes

115. Do you play the Wii?

when someone has one

116. Are you listening to music right now?

117. Do you like chicken noodle soup?

yes

118. Do you like Chinese food?

yes

119. Favourite book?

harry potteR?

120. Are you afraid of the dark?

yes

121. Are you mean?

yes

122. Is cheating ever okay?

123. Can you keep white shoes clean?

no. once i stepped in a massive puddle and got wet like halfway up my calf

124. Do you believe in love at first sight?

125. Do you believe in true love?

n..yes?

126. Are you currently bored?

yes

127. What makes you happy?

friends, having a good time, making people laugh

128. Would you change your name?

129. What your zodiac sign?

scorpio

130. Do you like subway?

yeah

131. Your bestfriend of the opposite sex likes you, what do you do?

we would both suffer

132. Who’s the last person you had a deep conversation with?

you (this is a repeat again)

133. Favourite lyrics right now?

134. Can you count to one million?

i could, yes

135. Dumbest lie you ever told?

bro idk

136. Do you sleep with your doors open or closed?

closed

137. How tall are you?

5′4″?

138. Curly or Straight hair?

i have curly hair

139. Brunette or Blonde?

brunette

140. Summer or Winter?

summer

141. Night or Day?

cant choose

142. Favourite month?

november

143. Are you a vegetarian?

144. Dark, milk or white chocolate?

dark

145. Tea or Coffee?

tea

146. Was today a good day?

eh i guess

147. Mars or Snickers?

mars

148. What’s your favourite quote?

“you’re like shaggy from scooby doo; always alone”

149. Do you believe in ghosts?

yes? im scared of them so

150. Get the closest book next to you, open it to page 42, what’s the first line on that page?

“’You will blow your eyes out,’ said Nwoye’s mother...” (Things Fall Apart)

#captaincreashion

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