#so dion's not as focused into it

[razzle-zazzle]

I really like how you stick to Dion's character and when you expand on it then it seems like something he would do. In your Psynautica Au Dion leaves to support his family. Yes he leaves but it's FOR them. So my question is this, do you think in an all cannon he would have been the one to run away to camp instead of Raz (if Dion was psychic) in order to become a Psychonaut so that he could make money for his family that way?

Or do you think he just does side jobs in the nearest town the circus is in and supports his family that way?

There's actually a few major differences between Psynautica and Canon Dion! Because as I said, I don't think canon Dion could run away without drastically changing the circumstances and his motivations—and though the Psynautica Aquatos are still performers, there's a lot that's different: Augustus and Lucrecia's memories were never manipulated, for one, and there is no water curse. Just Augustus not wanting to see anymore of his family lost to space travel.

Additionally, in Psynautica, Raz already ran off to go see his heroes, giving Dion the idea. I've changed it so that Raz didn't run away with the intention of getting a job, the receptionist just mistook him for an intern and Raz got pulled into hijinks—but the basic takeaway is that Raz reached out, made connections, and ultimately helped the family.

So Naut Dion decides that if Raz can pull something like that off, then he can too. And this Dion, while still fundamentally Dion, has just enough teenage rebellion in him to tango with space travel, to look beyond the skies. Because while canon Dion has plenty of evidence of the curse, naut Dion doesn't. All naut Dion has is Augustus' and Lucrecia's stories about the Valermo Incident—he doesn't have a watery hand dragging his siblings down. So it's easier for him to disregard his father's warnings than it is for his canon counterpart, though he certainly has plenty of fear in the back of his mind when he gets his first posting!

He's still Dion, of course. He still does it to serve the family's interests just as much as he's serving his own, still worries if he made the right decision and deals with homesickness constantly. He's still an idiot with too much to prove—he's just gone and jumped straight into the deep end himself, rather than having his little brother spur on events to turn his whole world upside down.

As for the second part of your question, no. If canon Dion were psychic, he would simply ignore that part about himself. Repress it so hard he doesn't even realize it's there. And canon Dion definitely puts a lot more focus into performing, so I don't think he would really pursue a job outside of that.

[demynom]

Why are there so many posts about proving that the two first canonically gay final fantasy characters are not actually in love and were never in love, despite being presented in a way that is natural and authentic (and deeply compelling) in the context of what kind of story it is

[ilostyou]

i’m sooo confused by this weird chunk of the internet insisting that taylor is this awful person all because she didn’t like. worship celine dion on stage

[brain-bumbler]

I sometimes think about how the endless travel of a traveling circus has likely made the Aquato kids social skills poor and made them very lonely

Ohhhh I love that idea! I know that most circuses are actually quite social- they have traveling schools, and families usually settle down for the off-season in the same cities or towns, so kids have both new and old friends.

But I don't think the Aquatos have the typical circus experience! I think their family moves mostly on its own, maybe frequently switching between circuses for larger performances, but never staying in one place. They have too many enemies. They can't go near the big top, and wherever they are they're always set apart, always different.

I think its just so open to interpretation depending on the plot! Maybe some or all of the kids are very socially adept from meeting so many people and keeping up long-distance friendships, maybe they can always fit into a new group because they work with such diverse people.

Or maybe they're more isolated, more nervous, always having a curse hanging over their heads that no one else would understand. They stick close to each other, drive each other crazy. But who else do they have?

I imagine having a boyfriend or girlfriend would be hard for the older teens, and I remember how hard it was to keep friends after moving. It makes me think of all the ways that interacting with the interns could go!

[sea-of-dust]

Alva,Frederick,Edgar,Demi x Rock Vo. GN! Reader

Compared to the way you dress they would have never guessed you knew your way around a ballroom

N: I'm gonna keep thinking of acheron and black swans dances final frame. Also Frederick's new skin, that thing has a grip on me,poppin party,Céline Dion,Mustard service references

Warnings: mentions of drinking, might be ooc

Ugh, you and luca being friends is one thing, him noticing the hunter and saying "ez sweep" is another. Luca would tell you what to do against him you'd do it, he'd get pissed you two would do it everytime you see em. Strangely enough is that you've never seen Alva before and when you asked who the fabled "tall coat guy" luca would answer "litterally a tall coat guy"

As soon as you did see him however you knew why luca didn't want you to ever meet him. His cold gaze, the scar near his eye, the elegance he radiates. "Are you single?" "Excuse me?" Luca would know instantly if you met him when you come back like a children's cartoon protagonist that's just been kissed by their crush. "Wow..." he was mortified.

Luca does get a bit werided out when he thinks too much about you crushing on his teacher, that dosent stop him from giving you heads up tho. "There's a public map" you stop tuning your neck nearly snapping to see him "where? Can I perform? Is the tall coat guy gonna be there?" "Dunno" "I'll take it" So the most delulu person on earth (you/j) decided to perform under the deck of the ship, not paying much mind as you played songs you thought he'd like, trying not to make direct eye contact with this seemingly uninterested man, too focused on his conversation with the clerk. You thought maybe he had tuned you out after the first few chords, until the next match with him where he hummed. A humming a little too similar to the lyrics you sang. While kiting him you could barely believe your ears, you had to have Demi fact check you.

A few more performances and a chair was all it took for him to begin to speak to you. "That voice of yours is wonderful" your eyes widen, looking up at him quickly, he smirks, reminiscing on the concert. "I'm normally not the type to like rock. I'm glad you're an acception" you froze, you could have sworn he could hear you internally scream or atleast see you blush as much as you did

He isn't very social but you've gotten the treat of seeing him smile, and not terror shock you as much. "You've gotten soft" "have I now?" In truth you went from being able to kite at least 3 ciphers to 2.5, he doesn't terror shock you but he makes up for it in actual shocks. Atleast he's friendly enough to show you where the dungeon is before poking you with the staff. There would also be the occasional soft look in his eyes eventually making a bit more physical contact with you. "You're so pretty" you re-wrap his bandages causally mummbling that out, he retracted his hand quickly. "Did I tie something too tight?" "No" you hold out your hand for his arm. "Do you really think im pretty" your eyes widen "I didn't think you heard me but yea, the way your eyes pierce into people is attractive" you blush embrassed you're rambling this much "atleast in my opinion" he looks away before placing his arm into your hand to continue wrapping, you continue on nervously wrapping them. He'd look at them later on in the match, thinking about what you said, it's too distracting for him to just not hear "you're pretty" over and over

He'd ask you out pretty awkwardly, because it would be straight to the point. "I love you, please consider me as a partner" "." He'd stand there like a brick and you would be to, out of pure shock your brain would have just exploded by then. "Sure-" brainfart of an answer, biggest regret of your life. Thank god he didn't seem to mind.

He likes comming out of his office just to see you out there practicing, you'd hear his foot steps and greet him with a smirk. "You've been in there for 15 hours I can't feel my hands" "I'm sure you're fine" "they feel like white noise" "so you feel them" "no" closing his eyes he'd listen to your careful fingers press on strings and strum, whenever he opened his eyes he always looked love struck so you try to block out his face from your mind, but the more you try to shut it out the more clear it gets. You had to stop looking at him when you practice

He'd notice if you've overused your voice during a match. Coughing, trying to relieve strain, pinching the front of your neck. He'd stop you mid kite and tell you about ways to relieve it. "Hopefully you like tea and honey." "?" "For your throat" "oh" he kisses your forehead. "I'll prepare some after this. Go decode for now" you'd have a higher chance of failing ciphers after that, Luca had to supervise. "He's so pretty..." "decode for him" easiest way to get you to lock in and to shut up about Alva

The only pet peeve he has with you is when you're both in a match and a survivor would say something along the lines of "I don't know how to get around this hunter" and you and luca would respond simultaneously "ez sweep" so he started finding loop holes, such as winking at you during kites, flirting with you if he found you first leaving the cipher bare, and just going after Luca first. He was no longer "ez sweep" to you two anymore, you had to tell a new survivor to "follow their gut!" For a while

He didn't care much for your rumors about being an aristocrat, if anything they're an afterthought, and an explanation on why you're able to causally name plants, and almost never use your hands when eating you'd eat fruits with a fork or a toothpick. This did come into play when you asked him to dance. Surely nothing it could be fine? He barely remembers how to do ballroom dance, so you went easy on him. It felt like a roller coaster. You could be able to tell he was embrassed everytime he almost stepped on your feet, the quick turns he wasn't ready for you'd catch his eyes widen. Somehow able to dip someone as tall as him you catch an exhausted smile on his face. "I should do this more often with you" he scoffs "maybe another time"

Ugh, as a musician he respects you knowing your talents after attending a show you did in the lobby, or just hearing it blast a few times but knowing your background you're gonna have to go the extra mile to even get him to associate with you. A person dressed like some local turning out to be an aristocrat, and their family respects that? Ridiculous you must be lying

He'd warm up to you slowly, he was annoyed he could hear you practice? Take these headphones. Then he couldn't hear the piano? Alright you'll change the time you do practice. He'd hate to admit it but when overwhelmed He'd purposely look for you while practicing, chaotic riffs like the ones you play would usually overwhelm him, but there's a difference when you practice, you're humming the lyrics softly while playing watered downed versions of certain bits, sometimes pleasing soft riffs. It's therapeutic, won't let you catch him listening though

That changes when you begin to date him. Now he's in the same room! "Im gonna pratice one i dont think youd like much" "I'm sure I can enjoy it regardless" you hum uncertainly hesitantly placing your fingers where they need to go, and begin to play, the melodies seeming uncertain of themselves as if shy. "With all the times I made mistakes infront of you I never expected you to be so considerate it hurts your performance" he sits closer to you "I'll be alright, play as you see fit regardless of me being in audience" "alright..." You play a bit hesitantly in the beginning, but pretty quickly you practice as usual, you sigh as you complete it. "That was too difficult" "do you want me to not be here when you practice?" You're not very sure how to answer that

He'd enter your room at night. "I know you're awake" "WOAH" you jolt back squinting your eyes to try and get a better look at him. "Why are you here at this hour?" "I got scared" "Sure bud" you embrace him, letting stiff arms return the favor. In truth he was kept awake by the thoughts of things couples usually do, sleeping in the same bed being one of them, imagining you there just wasn't going to cut it for him, to have you near him, to trust him enough to sleep in the same room as him let alone close to his chest, he felt at ease. You would wake up to his grip firmly around you or from him carassing your cheek or playing with your hair.

It feels werid when you two aren't in manor games together, you're like eatchothers lucky charms, he can't really handle if you're in too many games without him in a row. "I gotta get back soon Frederick might sleep on the piano again" Demi raises an eyebrow "he what?" "what if he stares so hard at my guitar it ends up full of sorrow" Demi's heard it all, she's heard of him evaporating, laying on couches, playing piano then sighing pausing and continuing to play a more loudly and harshly (according to Luca) "he thinks about alota things at once you know"

He does feel a bit strange when it comes to physical affection. Hugs and small kisses did feel a icky, when you do show him physical affection you'd try to keep it to a minimum accolading this, he judges you for that. Playing with his hair and stopping he looks up at you with narrowed eyes "what?" "Keep going" he grumbles. He'd start turning around to judge you if you dared to remove your hands from him. Sometimes even initiating, which would confuse and fluster the heck out of you. He does have his limits don't push them and he'll be fine.

He'd invite you to practice with him sometimes. It would always fluster the hell outta you but barely for him. "Are you sure?" You look around a bit frantically "I'm sure" "I'll get my gutair then" as soon as you sit down with him it usually goes with him beginning to play, you joining in after seeming to get the gist, you realize there was sheet music the entire time for you, say that you're "built diffrent" for just knowing what to play automatically "I'm just built like that" "Uh huh..." he disregards it, he knows you forget about the sheet music most of the time. Atleast he doesn't stay there for hours away from most people, that much anymore, now he spends atleast half of that practice session with you.

So to punish you for almost always never paying attention, he decided to make a song, no surprise he'd already think of making you a song, this was just an excuse for if you ever asked him why. "Do you mind if we practice again today" "you can't get enough of me can you" teasing him, you go with him hearing the unfamiliar song he began to play, you get behind him and begin to read the sheet music. "This one has alot of emotion to it" you continue to listen, wrapping your arms around his neck. "I think I got this" letting go of him, you play along with the emotional tone of the song. Test magically passed

You'd tease him with some song choices, letting him recognize the songs he wrote played on your gutair, or singing a lyric he just can't pass over for some reason "you haven't found everything you've been searching. Find it with me then we'll lose it and find it again" he blushes you could tell he was thinking too much on it. he turned away closing his eyes as you continued on singing, was your voice always this hypnotizing? Why are these chords so flustering now of all times? "Please stick to rock" "this is rock" "oh" you could barely hear that, getting closer to him you whisper in his ear "pleasantries-" "something I say to you, love" "so you know this" he tries to hide his flustered face. "The lyrics are pretty tame I'm surprised a song you've heard for a while now flustered you" you hug him kissing his cheek. You look foward to his reaction whenever you play songs like that near him, or just him paying too much attention to the lyrics and drifting into his imagination

Now imagine him finding out those you being an aristocrat rumors were real. You had him thinking you were normal until you ate a grape with a toothpick and knew how to tie his aggressively fancy bows. As soon as a partner dance came along you quite litterally swept him off his feet. A style of partner dance that was unique full of dramatic turns it almost felt like you were just dragging him along a bit, a weightless, graceful dance that would have been unexpected if you weren't accustomed to it. A dip is where you two make eye contact. "Did I tuker you out too much?" You smile uncertainly,him huffing to catch his breath, his mind racing with thoughts. "I'm fine" "would you like to do for another then?" "I'd rather not"

Ugh, pretty loud and he just hears the mumbles, he'll think it's incoherent metal, disrupts painting when you hear a sudden yell no matter how pretty it is

He dosent dislike you personally, after all you gave him your spare ear muffs when he brought this up to you. He becomes a good ally after that, you could go for a rescue and he'd be able to cover you. Those ear muffs come in handy, so handy that hunters try to take them. Unfortunately, you or him are always the first to yank them off or knock It out the hand of the hunter

He would slowly become apart of you Demi and Lucas crew. That one guy in a group that's never there but when he is it makes that day better, he's that guy. It gets so hype over there the hunter would turn their head wondering about the noise. "we got it guys!!" "YEA" "were getting a 4 escape!!" The hunters oprea singer

He'd grow super attached to you after you say something positive about his art. "Youve made this in a day?" "Yea?" "I find that hard to believe, the layering in this, the way they don't just lay ontop of eatchother but blend, not to mention accurate shadows" you take a pause dazed at the fine work. "It's beautiful" he doesn't speak, shocked that you knew the beauty and worth of his art something that most he met didn't understand, he fell for you hard over those comments, exactly why he shows you his pieces more often

You two would start dating rather quickly, you dropping signs the most aggressive way possible, causally holding hands when alone, sharing a cipher and really bad ideas "we should rescue luca" "no" "?" "He told me I should cut my canvas in half so I had four drawings instead of two" "...I mean in concept it's good but it might set ya off" "it already did" "after half then?" "Yea" thankfully Demi swooped in

You do try to sit down and paint with him. It was like a toddler following along a Bob Ross tutorial, but atleast Bob didn't stare at your painting for long periods of time. "Are you familiar with aristocrats?" "Yea?" He narrows his eyes "are you one?" "Are my drawings that bad?" "No these strokes are just ones nobility usually do" "crazy" he knew you were an aristocrat, and one that appreciated his art is even better. "Consider me your biggest fan in the art world" he giggles going back to his piece

He's run out of paintings during a match? Suddenly this isn't a match it's a rock show. "Find something in the item boxes nearby I'll distract them for you" distract them the loudest way possible how did you even bring an amp to a match?! "Why do you keep playing poppin party songs" "1) they're loud enough to cover the sound of us moving 2) they're more focused on me, the source of the music and 3) if you actually noticed" you point at Joseph "I found out he in particular has a real liking for Arisa he's not just gonna ignore her out of all people" Sure enough a familiar photographer appeared in the distance. "You mind opening the exit gate"

Despite him being sarcastic as hell he tries to sing along when you practice or perform. "You look like someone just sucked the life outta you" "how do you do this on the regular?" "Vocal practice wait till you have to scream in matches to save people" "." This stuff isn't for him but listening to you do it sounds alot better, and its nice to hum. You've caught him humming more times than you can count, and whenever you tell him he gets embrassed. "It's cute tho" "I'm sure the hunter could catch us if I continued" "They're across the map"

He hates the way you kiss whenever you're rushing somewhere. You do this thing he calls the entertainer's peck. Where you'd wave or acknowledge him, kiss his cheek and continue walking. He hates it because of how it lingers, you can't just take his hand to turn him toward you only to kiss him on the cheek and leave to a concert area or to decode. You're making him lose focus, one of those kisses that make you want another. You'd have him mummbling like a fool, espically if he could chase after you he'd give you his own peck, which led to the part he hated the most, the soft "I'll cherish this" expression on your face when you look back at him. He's giving you another until you stop looking at him like that!

He knew you were an aristocrat and he was thankful for it there was a higher chance you realized his talents. Hed ask you to dance first. "Shall we dance?" "Sure" informal way of accepting but formal style of dance. The way you both were able to be in sync no matter what move you threw at him, it turned out to be more of a test of skill than a friendly dance, as soon as you dipped him you could see all of the energy he lost hit him at once as he could barely keep himself up, you giggled at his predicament. "We should do this more often, you're alot more used to this than I thought" "we should, maybe I could try tossing you" his face straightens "nevermind"

Party! She's litterally with you all the time, with Luca as a carry on. You three would basically host rock concerts in the manor. You'd sing about freedom and living on, who cares for the noise complaint invest in ear plugs!!

You'd always be with her or luca during the games, though you do prefer Demi a bit more, she dosent laugh so hard it alerts the hunter. She's also more aware than Luca making running away alot easier. Though after games you prefer Luca, Luca doesn't cling to you so much you have to sleep in the same bed as him to make him feel better, he just calls you his hero

Does help when you're rescuing her, Naiad could be dashing toward you yet all be stopped by a simple ear spliting shreak from you, you had her seeing double. "I didn't know you could also do metal" "it's useful with the amount of commissions I get"

She'd randomly get an idea to try and wing along while you play. "I got it I got it" reasuring herself you begin to play familiar chords as she opens her mouth you change them to diffrent ones "I DONT KNOW THE LYRICS TO TEAR DROPS" "you got it!" She indeed barely had it, barely able to say of the lyrics correctly. Her revenge? "You mind playing this" she shows you probably the most confusing sheet music you've seen in your career a Frederick special if you will. "Alright-" and so the manor wondered what happened to the music they randomly heard when passing your room for the next 2 days

She'd fall asleep If you two weren't summoned for a round that day leaving you and her alone to explore the manor or practice guitar. People would come and go to you twos makeshift karoke. Espically Norton apparently. "IT WAS LOST LONG AGO BUT ITS ALL COMMING BACK TO ME" those two would sing with their hearts out the whole manor could tell you the lyrics by heart. You could play a cord to a song she'd accidently "ITS ALL COMMING BACK TO ME" "." "That wasn't the right song?" "No"

Almost scream royality. Random bug? "AHHHHHH" small spoke? "AUHHHHHHH" you and luca pretending to be possessing eatchothers bodies "NOOOOOO" surprisingly she doesn't scream like this when a giant nun lady jumps at her, except when she did and found out why you're scream royality. "So how'd ya get chaired?" "Rescue me first" "you're way too far from half" she pouts "so I tried screaming to burst her ear drums like you do..." "and?" "And she looked me straight in the eyes, then the cat screamed louder I swear it was like one of yours and then I was here" ".pft" "not cool!"

She gets tipsy during rounds, leading to some fun confessions of love. "Y/n...I love youu" she leans onto you, puckered lips to an exaggerated degree. "I gotta decode Demi" sighing you let her cling onto you tighter "did any person tell you how cute you are? Am I the first?" "You aren't" she gasps dramatically "reallllyyyy?" "Yea, a barmaid got to me before you" she blows a raspberry

She leads you away for rounds, asking for help setting up a kiting area. "Thanks for the help" she lands a kiss on your cheek. "Demi" "what?" "I appreciate it but Luca might vomit over this again" "he forced himself to" she wraps her arms around your waist, leaning in to be closer to you "he'll be fine" he wasn't fine. "You two really gotta get a room" "wadya mean?" "You keep looking with these lovey dovey eyes, were all on the same cipher and that poor guys probably single handedly evading that rock guy. "Arent they the same person" "yea they both got that same scar" "now you're tag teaming me?" "Yea" you both make the same look.

If she were ever to escape the hunter injured she'll run to you near instantly. "I think you should kiss me and all my injuries will heal" "that's not how it works Demi" you continue your healing "you're so warm..." "I know" "hehe" you kiss her forehead, finishing up. "I'm still injured" she dramatically places her hand on her forehead, both of you hearing a cipher being popped. "Oh look you're at full health" she sighs "worth a shot"

You being an aristocrat? She didn't care much but it did affect how you did certain things, and explained why you knew how to take care of plants,paint, and piano...barely the gutairs more fitting. When you asked her to dance, she got flustered, such a formal request, but comming from you it should have been a bit obvious it was comming. She didn't expect how graceful you were, it felt like an instructor dancing with their student for a test, the turns focused eyes turning to soft looks whenever you made eye contact with her. It was a flustering the hell outta of her she couldn't think for more than two secounds with you suddenly invading her thoughts with the shift in demeanor. When she took the lead by the end and dipped you, you seemed to snap out of it. "You're really good at improv" "how sweet of you" she huffs bringing you up to stand. "Would you like to dance again later?" "You sound like an old noble"

[if-whats-new]

What's New In IF? Issue 30 (2024)

By Aj, Dion, Briar, Jen and Peter

Now Available!

Itch.io - Keep Reading below

If you read the zine, consider liking the post: it helps us see how many people see it! And sharing is caring! <3

~ EDITORIAL ~

Event Highlight!

In this Issue we take a quick look at the Videotome Jam hosted by Freya, the dev behind all the Videotome game engines!

Continue reading to find out more!

We want some feedback!

As we’re starting to get a hand of things, we would love some feedback from you guys! What you enjoy, want more or less off, how we could improve... Anything goes! We even have a nifty form.

We hope you enjoy this new issue!

AJ, DION, BRIAR, JEN AND PETER

~ BE A PART OF THE ZINE ~

THIS ZINE ONLY HAPPENS WITH YOU!

Want to write 1-2 pages about a neat topic, or deep-dive into a game and review it in details? Share personal experiences or get all academic?

WRITE FOR THE COLUMN!

Prefer to be more low-key but still have something to share? Send us a Zine Letter or share a game title for Highlight on…!

WE WANT TO HEAR FROM YOU!

Came across something interesting? Know a release or an update announced? Saw an event happening? Whether it's a game, an article, a podcast… Add any IF-related content to our mini-database!

EVERY LITTLE BIT COUNTS!

Contact us through Tumblr asks, Forum DMs, or even by email! And thank you for your help!!

~ EVENT SPOTLIGHT : Videotome Jam - "Waiting" ~

November 16th to December 1st 2024

Videotome Jam is a two-week-long game jam for games made in any of the Videotome engines with the optional theme of "Waiting".

What is Videotome?

Videotome is a series of small homebrew IF/VN engines made by Freya Campbell (communistsister), an indie game developer focusing on narrative games that are usually:

science fiction, horror, &/or romance

close to 100% LGBTQ characters

free/PWYW with low tech requirements

liable to make players keysmash due to feelings

Videotome was first released in April 2022 as a part of a game entry for the Domino Club collective. The initial idea for the engine was to make writing text-heavy games as hassle-free as possible, focusing not that much on the visual presentation format, but more on the writer's experience. It would allow writers to write in a notepad and then it would somehow grab the .txt file and parse the lines into an array, spitting them out one line at a time as a kinetic novel.

At the moment there are four engines available:

Videotome, for linear, no frills text / images / music;

Videotome ADV, adding a more conventional layout with ignorable choices and branching;

Super Videotome, for more fully featured and freeform image/canvas use;

Videotome Heartbreak, adding a stat raising dating sim & storylets structure to the above.

If you're more interested in the process of making these engines, check out the devs blog post - Words, Friction, Syntax: Stuff I thought about when making Videotome. (The post also includes a very interesting case study concerning other game engines Freya has experience with.)

If you want to check out some examples of projects made with Videotome, take a look at this collection. It includes games made by both Freya and other devs.

~ ONGOING (VOTING) ~

The voting for ECTOCOMP 2024 has officially started! To vote and participate as a jury, you must do so by giving between 1 to 5 stars on each entry page of the jam. The voting period ends on November 30.

~ ONGOING (SUBMITTING) ~

A Hallmark movie is a feel-good, family-friendly film, often centered around romance, personal growth, or holiday themes. A Very Hallmark Game Jam with a theme of “Charming Love Interest with a Secret” is also all about that!

Are you a fan of Videotome games? Then the Videotome Jam with an optional theme “Waiting” is for you!

This year’s Yuri Game Jam is in full progress. The devs have until December 2nd to submit their projects.

The Educational Jam is a perfect place to learn something new. Discuss some obscure tidbit. Showcase your insight about a specific thing, your pub trivia skills, or that Wikipedia rabbit hole you went down last time.

Disabled Rep VN Jam has a very simple premise but a very important message.

Once upon a time, a game jam was held to create stories around the theme of fairy tales… and that game jam is the Once Upon A Time VN Jam. It’s running from October 1st to January 31st.

Concours de Fiction Interactive Francophone 2025 is for all French-speaking enthusiasts. Submissions are accepted March 3rd 2025.

Are you perhaps a fan of more somber, melancholic themes? Then check out the Dying Year - Visual Novel Jam! You have until the end of the year to participate.

The Black Visual Novel Jam is all about working with creative professional developers who work in visual novels to bring more Black stories to life. The goal is to create a space where Black creators can show their unique storytelling through visual novels.

~ OTHER ~

PIZZAPRANKS is accepting submissions for their Indiepocalypse Issue #61. If you’re a dev and would like to try out your luck, definitely check it out! Any game is welcomed, not only IF.

~ NEW RELEASE ~

In Arctic Adventure unearth forgotten journals, repair malfunctioning equipment, and solve puzzles to piece together the station’s dark past. But beware—some secrets are better left buried in the ice.

You are a dragon - huge, winged, flying and even capable of magic. Only here, in a system of caves created by your magic, you can be yourself. But the time has come for you to leave your home. The old map, that you've been keeping since times immemorial, is now ready to unravel it's secrets in A Dragon and the Tower.

You’ve spent your whole life visiting the majestic Hotel Lexington, and now you’ve inherited it! The once-grand building is in disrepair, and rumored to be haunted! You’re the only one who can restore its former glory before it’s lost forever. Check in to your hotel, and check out the ghosts in Haunted Hearts Hotel.

As always, don't forget to check out the submitted entries to the events mentioned in the previous pages. They deserve some love too!

~ NEW RELEASE (WIP) ~

You are a key member of "The Constellation Club," a close-knit group of friends brought together by your shared love for music and dreams. Over time, the club members drifted apart, but a mystery brings you all back together. Reunite with your friends, uncover secrets, and chase the dreams that first united you in The Constellation Club (Twine).

Have you enjoyed the first Volume of Oblivious Melodies? Then be sure to check out Chapter 1 of Volume 2 (Twine)! You play as the Horne siblings, navigating their emergence into gentry society. You will delve into a country divided by class, religious dissent, political factionalism, and the ever-encroaching interests of empire. @oblivious-melodies

In Ashenmaw - Dragons of Marrowoods (CScript) you play as a freshly hatched dragon whelp, navigating the odds and ends of the politics and mysteries of the five flights. Intermingle with the younger races, and jump headfirst into uncovering the secrets of Ashenmaw and the Marrowoods. @ashenmaw-if

Aydan joins his husband Leo in this important family reunion that takes place 2 months after his father’s death. Suddenly, they are all trapped in the house for 3 days and the lawyer states that one of the siblings is the murderer of their own father! Find out who the real culprit is in Guilty at 5PM (Ren’Py).

In a realm of forgotten tales, you emerge as a ghost to yourself. Stranded in a land where memories fear to tread, the icy breath of solitude kisses your bare flesh, a chilling reminder of your forsaken existence. In this realm where salvation dances with oblivion, Snowborn (CScript), awaken to tread the treacherous path through a world steeped in sorcery and demise.

You are a young nobleman, in a stagnating empire, either on the verge of resurgence, or it’s final demise. An Empire held together by fragile institutions, led by ego-driven men. And here you are, in the middle of it all. As this den of vipers strike, where will you fall? Find out in Scion of the Alason (CScript).

You wake up suddenly with a system telling you that you are occupying the body of a green tea b!tch! The spy of the fearsome overlord, Hasthael who betrayed him for the male hero, resulting in the death of his beloved lightning hound. Avoid the fate of dying and accomplish the missions given by two of the available systems in Project Dominion (CScript).

You are the Aeon, an omniscient entity as old as time. When your powers begin to malfunction and the source of an incoming threat is unbeknownst to you, how will you protect the fabric of the universe? Abandon your omnipresent form for the first time in millennia and craft an identity as a demon to infiltrate the Ethereal Plane in The Time Keeper (CScript).

~ UPDATES ~

Aesemyr: The Withering (CScript) released 3/4 of the "university gathering" path of Chapter 3.

After Dark (CScript) released the last part of the fifth day of the journey.

Eldritch Tales: Inheritance (CScript) released part one of Chapter 3. @darielivalyen

Honor Amongst Thieves (CScript) updated their public demo. @leoneliterary

Oh Mother, Where Art Thou? (CScript) started Act 2 of Chapter 1.

Our Life: Now and Forever (Ren’Py) added extra content to their Patreon demo. @gb-patch

The Abyssal Song (Twine) released Chapter 5. @ri-writes-if

Virtue’s End (CScript) has updated their Patreon demo. @virtues-end

When Life Gives You Lemons (CScript) updated their public demo. @when-life-gives-you-lemons-if

~ OTHER ~

Is playtesting something that interests you? Check out part one of Drew Cook’s let’s TEST IF #1: being a playtester. @golmac

GlasswingGames is currently running a giveaway! You can enter to win either a chibi or emote of a character of your choice! @glasswinggames

~

As always, we apologize in advance for missing any update or release from the past week. We are only volunteers using their limited free time to find as much as we can - but sometimes things pass through the cracks.

If you think something should have been included in this week's zine but did not appear, please shoot us a message! We'll do our best to add it next week! And if you know oncoming news, add it here!

~ MAYBE YOU NEXT? ~

We did not get a submission this week. But if you have an idea for a short essay, or would like a special space to share your thoughts about IF and the community...

Shoot us an email!

~ HIGHLIGHT ON ~

A couple of games that we thought were cool.

God-Cursed by @wings-of-ink (Twine)

I think this game is fantastic. Plot, ROs, writing, everything. Deserves thousands of reads and compliments!

//recommended by Briar [Team]//

Your favourite game here?

Do you have a favourite game that deserves some highlighting?

An old or recent game that wowed you so much you spam it to everyone?

Tell us about it! And it might appear here!

Hello! I appreciate what you all do. As a living thing with a 9-5 job, I couldn't regularly check updates from existing WIPs, especially the ones I really like. I also tend to be the last person to know new IFs with lots of potential. So, I'm glad that with your zine, I get weekly updates from everyone in one place. Thank you, thank you so much!

- a very mysterious anon

WE LOVE TO HEAR FROM YOU ALL! WHETHER IT'S GOOD OR BAD, OR EVERYTHING IN BETWEEN...

Have something to say? Send us a message titled: Zine Letter!

As we end this issue, we would like to thank:

our awesome mysterious anon!

For a very encouraging message!

As always, huge thanks to all you readers who liked, shared, and commented on the last issue!

What might be tiny actions are huge support and motivators to us!

Thank you for cheering us on this journey!

~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~

We actually have a separate Zine for all our individual Interviews!

Last Issue’s Interview with Leia Talon will be added this upcoming week.

And see you again next week!

AJ, DION, BRIAR, JEN AND PETER

WHAT'S NEW IN IF? 2024-ISSUE 30

[jazziejax]

Queen Treatment for

The King

Pairings- Tashi Duncan x black!OC, Art Donaldson x black!OC, Patrick x black!OC

Summary- cute, sexy, and heated moments between Dion King and her best friends who adore her

Warnings- anxiety attack??, jealousy, crying?, confessing if feeling, girls kissing ;)

Jazzie’s Notes!- sorry for any typos or mistakes, it is yet again, 1AM…I guess this is when I thrive??? It’s also not proofread because I don’t enjoy reading my own work :)

Word Count- 3,239

Part I, Part II

The only that Dion could hear was the sound of her small grunts that sounded through the empty tennis court as she hit the ball back and forth. She was currently practicing with one of her teammates. She had asked the girl to match her in the cafeteria earlier, catching her with some of her friends. The table had gotten quiet when she walked over but she didn’t care. Daphne agreed and Dion walked away, but she could hear the hushed cheer between them. She was a good player but nowhere as good as Dion. Although said skills weren’t anywhere on display at the moment. She was struggling to play against some regular who could barely keep up with her.

She was in her head after what Patrick had told her. She knew she told the boy to let the whole situation go and she’d talk to the girl but it’s been two days and both of them have been MIA with the other. She and Tashi never had something like this happen between them and it was throwing Dion off her game.

Instead of focusing on her opponent, watching their moves to see their weaknesses and strengths, whether they were better at a backhand or forehand, she was listening to the sound of her heartbeat. She could hear the sound of her feet hitting the ground in an irregular pattern. She could hear the sound of other people practicing tennis beyond the fence. All those things distracted her from thinking, trying to make her mind blank.

Trying to erase the thoughts about what Tashi was doing right now. Trying to not think about what Patrick said about Tashi. Trying to think of something other than the fact she still had feelings for her best friend. Trying to stop the feeling she got in her heart and her stomach whenever she thought about her. Felt that she was near. Trying to rid the thoughts of the girl who’s been plaguing her mind since they were thirteen.

She swung with all her force when the ball came her way, causing the bright beam to soar across the net. Daphne ducked as the ball passed her, barely skimming her shoulder. Dion slammed her racket down in frustration, letting out a loud groan. She was out of breath as she racked her fingers along the surface of her tight bun. Her back faced the girl on the other side of the net as she tried to collect her thoughts and calm her heart. Her fingers clasped at the nape of her neck, Daphne could see her shoulders rise and fall quickly, sweat glistening in the sun off her back.

Quicker than usual.

Concerned, the girl hopped over the net and jogged over to Dion.

“Hey, D, you okay?” She asked, stopping a few feet away from the girl. But Dion didn’t answer her, she couldn’t hear her. Her mind and heart were racing as she took in deep breaths. Her head started to spin, so she bent her knees and rested her hands on them to keep her up. She could feel her throat closing up in her. Worried, Daphne eased closer to the girl. She placed her hand on the girl’s back, not minding the sweat she could feel beneath her fingers.

“Hey, you’re okay. You’re alright.” She tried to soothe. Seeing that it wasn’t helping the girl, she looked around to see if there was anything to help her. Catching the sight of her water bottle sitting near her bag, the girl ran over and grabbed the large bottle before running back. She squatted down to the girl's height, handing the bottle to her. “Here, drink this.” She said, grabbing Dion’s wrist and placing the bottle in her hand.

Dion immediately twisted the cap off the bottle. She stood up and threw her back bag, starting to chug the cold water in the metal can. Daphne just stood there, watching as the girl put her mouth on her water bottle. She could see some water spill past the mouth and make its way down the girl's sweat-covered skin. Dion then brought the bottle down once she was down, causing Daphne to gulp and snap back into reality.

“You good?” The pale girl asked her long brown hair in a high ponytail. Dion looked over at her, hard brown eyes making contact with her green ones. She was a little taller than Daphne, who found it and her general aura to be a bit intimidating. Especially now.

“Yeah.” Was all Dion said, still trying to catch her breath, although it was better than earlier? She looked down at the bottle in her hands, the unfamiliar feeling of the metal cup in her hand. “Uh, sorry about your water.” She said, looking back up at her teammate and pointing at the bottle. “I drink it all.” She then held it out for the girl to take.

Daphne, who was a little more nervous than before, awkwardly chuckled as she took the bottle back. “It’s no problem at all.” She said. There was an awkward pause between them, both girls looking anywhere beside each other with their minds clouded.

“What was that, just now?” Daphne suddenly asked, causing Dion to look back over at her. The darker girl furrowed her brows, which made Daphne start to panic. “I mean, like, are you okay? Because that looked like it could have gotten worse. Intense, I mean.” She rambled, not wanting to sound rude and step on any toes, especially those of the Dion King, aka King Dion.

“Yeah, I’m okay,” Dion said, offering the girl the smallest smile which made Daphne feel things she wasn’t ready to admit. “It’s just…life.” She continued with a shrug. “It’s getting a little rough.” She joked, using her fingers to accentuate the word little with a small smirk on her face. It was almost like someone flipped a switch somewhere with how fast she chugged. She went from this girl who looked utterly helpless a few moments ago, back to regular charming Dion King.

“I know what you mean, schools kicking my ass right now in more ways than just class work,” Daphne said, a slight smile on her lips. “But, I’m always here if you need to talk, ya know? I’ve been told I’m a very good listener by…friends?” She said, more of a question to herself than to Dion. Dion furrowed her brows again in confusion, something she finds herself doing a lot of lately.

“I don’t have many friends,” Daphne answered her unspoken question. “Or any, honestly.” She shrugged.

“What about those girls you were eating lunch with earlier?”

“Sports groupies. Regular Stanford students that liked the idea of me being here on the tennis team and I was, kinda the only one that gave them the time of day.” Daphne stated with a simple shrug. Dion nodded at her with her arms crossed. “So that’s why I heard their giggles when I walked away?” She asked, even though she already knew the answer. Daphne silently winced at her words, almost tucking her head into her shoulders.

“You heard that?” She asked. Dion just chuckled and softly nodded her head. “Yeah, but it’s no big deal.” She shrugged. The girls shared soft giggles, unbeknownst to the lurking figure near the gates.

“Um, but yeah. I might take you up on that offer.” Dion said before walking over to her bags. Daphne was stunned into silence a little. “Oh. Cool. Cool, cool, cool.” She said, nodding her head as her eyes followed the girl’s form when she caught another figure in the corner of her eye. She looked over to see a familiar face.

“Oh, hey, Tashi.” She said casually.

Daphne almost froze at the girl’s words but she just tensed up as she continued to gather her things. Slinging her bag over her shoulder, she turned to see Daphne look over at the tall and slender figure of her best friend. Tashi didn’t say anything, arms folded over her chest as her eyes darted between the two. Before the atmosphere could get awkward, Dion started walking to the exit gate.

“See ya, Daph.” She called out over her shoulder. Daphne smiled, waving at the girl before she realized that Dion couldn’t see her. “Oh. See ya.” She called out. Dion passed Tashi without a word, feeling the girl's eyes follow her but not her body. Tashi stood at the gate for a moment, as she watched Dion walk away before looking back over at Daphne. Said girl just awkwardly smiled and waved at her, intimidated and uncomfortable under the tennis player's harsh gaze. Tashi gave her a once over before offering a sliver of a smile and a two-finger wave and jogging off to catch up with Dion. Daphne stood there, watching as she ran away.

“What the fuck just happened?” She whispered to herself.

“What the fuck is your problem?” Tashi hissed as she caught Dion. The girl in black didn’t turn around to answer her, keeping her eyes forward as she walked quickly to her dorm. “Don’t speak to me that way, you know I won’t answer you.” Was all she said, never once stopping. Tashi sighed as she trident father herself, too caught up in her emotions to think straight. She knew Dion was right, the girl never responded to such language, no matter how much she used it herself. After a few seconds of silence, the only sound being the sound of their fit hitting the ground, Tashi spoke again.

“What has been up with you these past few days?”

“I could ask you the same thing.”

“I already know that you know.”

“Okay, but I want to hear you say it.”

There was nothing said after that, causing Dion to let out a bitter chuckle. “That’s what I thought.” She said as she adjusted her bag on her shoulders and sped up her walking. Tashi said, following the girl hit on her trials. “Dion, it’s not like that.” The light-skinned girl pleaded.

“I don’t know what you mean, I can’t read your mind, Tash.” She said, still focused on her destination, never meeting the eyes that had been flushed on the side of her face their whole walk.

“What? So you want me to admit that I was jealous of how close you and Patrick were becoming? How I felt that you were replacing me with my boyfriend. The sexual tension between you two? Is that what you want?” She hissed. “As if you didn’t fuck Art when you came back from shopping, knowing we could hear you two in the next room.”

“I would never fuck Art to make you jealous, Tashi.” Dion said, her tone softening for just a few moments. “Not to make anyone jealous. I love Art.”

“You love him?” Tashi asked, almost stopping her walking at what Dion said. But Dion continued. But she couldn’t tell if whether it was because her mind was too busy to realize what she said or she was trying to avoid conversation. “Yes. Just how I love you and Patrick.” Was all the girl said.

“That’s not the same.” Tashi said, catching back up to her once she shook back from her shock.

“It is that same.” Dion said, stopping right outside the door of the dorm building and staring Tashi dead in the eyes for the first time during their whole conversation, back to her cold exterior. Both of them could hear the sound of Tashi’s heart breaking. But Dion was sticking up for herself. And Tashi was hearing the exact words she didn’t want to. She never wanted her love for Dion to amount to anything else in the world. She wanted what they had to special l. Something that almost existed outside of time, in a pocket just for them to access.

“Why wouldn’t it be?” Dion asked, looking innocently into Tashi’s eyes. She knew her words dug a knife into the girls heart but she was tried of Tashi playing with everyone’s feelings. Especially her, when she’s been there since the beginning.

“So, don’t even try to spin it like that. Like it’s on me. As if you and I don’t have sex when he or Patrick isn’t here.” Dion spat back quietly, going back to the what they were previously talking about and getting pissed all over again. “You were the one that agreed we could sleep together, but I never did for the sake of you. You were the one who still wanted me to be available so we could have what we had going on. I don’t know what you have going on in that head of yours besides tennis but you need to be honest with yourself before trying to put the blame on me.” She hissed before slamming open the glass door to the girl’s dormitory area. Tashi couldn’t say anything, knowing Dion was telling the truth. She felt her heart clench at the girl's words, Dion’s stress evident in her tone. It hurt her to even think about what she could have been going through these past few days.

She continued to follow the girl. To be fair, her dorm was directly next to hers. Nothing was said between them after that, but the air was tense wherever they stepped, so tense that it could suffocate those who were just in their rooms studying. Dion walked a step ahead of Tashi all the way to her dorm, and when she was about to opened the door, Tashi’s voice stopped her.

“I admit it.” She started. Dion paused, her back still facing her. “I admit that I was jealous because I thought I was losing you.” When she saw that Dion had no intention of turning around, she placed her hand on her shoulder and moved her. Now face to face, Dion spoke.

“Is that all?” She asked, her harsh tone from earlier now gone, replaced with a softer one. One that showed sadness. And her eyes wound meet the girl across from her, pulling on Tashi’s heartstrings.

“No.” Tashi said timidly.

Dion glanced up to meet her eyes, signaling the girl to continue.

“I can’t lose you, Dion.” She started, dropping her constant tough girl act. She always became vulnerable around Dion. And now here she was being vulnerable in the middle of the hall. “It was already tough watching you basically live the married life with Art around campus. He practically lives in your dorm room. I was jealous then because I didn’t have my boyfriend around and it felt like Art knew more about you than I did at some point. I didn’t say anything because…I felt like I had no right to. Not after what we agreed on. And then Patrick came and I saw how close you guys were, always laughing and jumping around. And whoever that chick was you were practicing with.” She ranted, her breaths becoming short as her heart rate picked up. Dion took a step forward, looking Tashi in her eyes that looked like they were about to water. “I could almost feel you slipping away from me. And I can’t have that because you’re all I know. You’re all I have, Dee.” She confessed.

Dion shook her head at the girls words, eyes mirroring Tashi’s. “That not true because I’ll never slip away from you.” She started, taking another step and clasping Tashi’s hands within hers. “Tash, you’ll always be my number one. No one could ever replace you.” She said. She looked down at their intertwined hands, the contracts between their skin tones almost symbolic of their opposite personalities. Yin & Yang.

“But you have to realize that I need other people in my life too.” She gulped, looking back up into her eyes. “You decided that you wanted to be with Patrick. You decided that you wanted to still sleep with me even though you don’t want anything exclusive. You make all the decisions, Tashi. I want to make some of my own.” She said softly, bringing her hands up to the girl's waist and pulling her close. Tashi unconsciously did the same, placing her hands on Dion 's back. They were practically breathing each other's air at this point. Telling every breath the other let out against their skin. “And just because I love them doesn’t mean I love you any less. You will always be important to me.” She said before cupping the girls cheek and connecting their lips. Tashi lunged into the kiss, missing the feeling of Dion entirely.

In the middle of the hall, the two girls kiss in each other's embrace, currently not caring if anyone saw them. To catch their breath,they pulled away from one another and connected their foreheads. Tashi closed her eyes as she raised her head to rub her nose against Dion’s face, basking in her scent and the feel of her skin on hers.

“You love them?” She asked, her words so soft that even their proximity didn’t do anything for it. But Dion heard her, and she nodded her head.

“I do.” She said, taking a moment to continue. As if saying it out loud made her finally accept what she was feeling. “But you will always be my first love.” She said.

“And you will always be mine. And I will always love you.” Tashi said.

Dion had the urge to kiss her again at her words, but she could feel her tiredness getting to her. So she grabbed hold of Tashi’s hand and opened the door to her room. She didn’t even turn around to look at the girl as she spoke. “I have something for you.”

Closing the door behind her, she dropped her tennis bag and made her way to the same nightstand she grabbed Patrick’s gift from. She pulled out two long dark red boxes. She handed one to Tashi, who filled her across the room, and kept the other one.

Opening it, Tashi could see that it was a silver tennis bracelet with large diamonds in it. They were all different cuts, giving the bracelet a more unique feeling than just the average tennis bracelet. “I have a matching one. And I know you’re more of a good girl but this was all they had. Maybe in the future I could get some custom ones made for us.” She said. Tashi just smiled down at the gift. “I love it.” She said, before looking up at the girl. “I love that we have matching ones.” She said, taking it out of the box and letting Dion clasp it in her wrist before doing the same for her.

She looked down at the beautiful bracelet with a soft look in her eyes before looking back up at Dion. “I love you.” She said, her tone egging for reassurance. Almost scared that Dion didn’t feel the same, no matter their previous conversation. Dion smiled at her. “I love you too.” She said before grabbing a hold of her hand that held the bracelet in her wrist. “Stay the night.” She demanded more than asked.

After taking a shower, the girls laid within her bed while light kisses were shared between the two. And then they drifted off to sleep, within each other's arms.

Thabk you guys for reading!!!! Let me know if you want more of this little series. I’m currently writing another full length Chakkengers fic that will go off the movies plot a little, with my own things to add and tweak. That will be out soon!

@lottiematthewsceo @djoenthusiast @summerssover @tsukishimawhore @miximora @jackierose902109 @rueblackst @douceurrrr

[ephemeral-roses]

Since it's been months, I am now forcing myself to be a brave little boy to post my process on my version of Ares, along with some art of Aphrodite. And sorry if the post is tagged weirdly, I still am unsure how to properly tag posts. I post every blue moon, so I don't think I still have an understanding of it.

These are my most recent and decent art of him, and I got a few notes on his design.

● His first scar is the one on his cheek, but it wasn't from any war or battle. When he was younger, he was exactly what one would imagine Ares to be, very arrogant and proud, with fighting on his mind despite having never been to any battles. He would play a game where he and someone would spar, and whoever gets the biggest scar wins. Hermes lost, only because he was so good at it.

● The tattoos he has are from Thrace, where he is said to have been born and was his favorite place. The symbol on the back of his hand is a snake, relating to them being one of his sacred animals.

And here is some art of him I made a few months ago, based on some paintings I've found of him. My favorite genre of Ares art is when he is dorned with flowers, the Erotes are playing with his weapons, and he is very happy with Aphrodite. It makes me very delighted.

Speaking of Aphrodite, this is what she looks like. I got a few notes on her personality and design.

● Since she is Aphrodite, she is very vain, focusing on her physical appearance a lot and becoming emotional whenever someone undermines or doubts her beauty, with the ability to become wrathful.

● But, as a mother, she is able to self-love aside for her children, putting her entire attention to them. Before she gets with Ares, she has already had a handful of children with previous lovers. Ares doesn't mind, of course.

● Her design is, of course, based on her origins from the sea and her being a sea goddess.

● She emerged from seafoam but was then taken in by Dione.

● Despite valuing her appearance and the way she presents herself and encouraging others to do the same, she does have one little quirk she inherited from her years living in the ocean. She eats like a beast, especially when it comes to seafood. When it is in her sight, she is devouring it like a wildwoman. This is just being very silly and having fun. Don't worry about it.

● Her little, uh, braid thing (I guess, I don't know what you'd call it exactly, I'm not good with hair) is divided into 7 sections, for the 7 types of Greek love. I'm gonna be transparent here. This is me trying to sound clever and creative when I'm not.

● When she is upset, whether sad or angry, her body starts resorting back to water and seafoam. I still can't find out how to draw it, unfortunately, even though the visuals look cool in my mind.

I am gonna try to post more frequently, especially the designs I've come up for the other gods. So far, this is all I could bring my energy to post.

[cryptictongues]

Dawns in Dalimil

pairing: Joshua Rosfield x Fem!Reader rating: Mature word count: 1.7k summary: You and Joshua have a sweet moment post-coitus.

warnings: Mentions of sex and the sweetest fluff EVER!!

Spoilers: There are a few mentions of things that if you aren't in a certain point in the game, you won't understand what I'm talking about. But just to clear things just in case, this takes place when Dalimil is first introduced.

Author's Notes: Just a heads up, please read my pinned post before following me! Minors and ageless blogs will be blocked as this blog's content is NSFW.

[AO3 link]

It’s late in Dalimil, so much so that the market outside the inn is dead silent and the ale house downstairs doesn’t have a whisper. The place is taking its rest, taking everyone with it before the dawn breaks… well except for the two of you.

With heavy breaths, heaving chests, and sweat shining on your bodies, you and Joshua lie in a small bed within a room from the Dalimil Inn recovering from the passionate love-making you both endured. Your trip to Dalimil was supposed to be short-lived as you both are trying to make it north to the Isles of Ark to meet with Prince Dion. However, the tension between the two of you had finally come to its breaking point and the most passionate, intimate sex you have ever had began and lasted until the dead of night. 

The bed creaks as Joshua moves to his side and you feel him get close to you, a hand placing itself under your left breast and lips making homage against your neck. He massages the subtle skin as he gives feather light kisses, causing you to giggle as a shiver runs down your spine. He bites down gently on the skin below your ear, causing a small yelp to leave your lips. “You are insatiable, you know that?” You breathe out, and he lets out a low chuckle into your ear. “You do this to me.” He bites down a little harder this time around, sucking and licking the spot to get another sweet sound out of you. You push him away slightly, laughing as he tries to keep his head in between your neck. “I need a break, Joshua. We’ve been at it nonstop for hours.”

He grabs the hand pushing against his chest, smirking at your struggle to get it out of his grasp. “You didn’t give me a break when I oh so kindly asked for one.” He brings your hand to his mouth, kissing your fingertips as he gauges your reaction. You scoff and sit up slightly. “Hey I gave you a cool down, and besides I did all the work that time. Give me some credit.”

Joshua shakes his head in amusement, propping himself up so his head was in his hand as his hand keeps hold of yours. “I hope you did enjoy yourself. I surely did.”

You grin, amused at his current demeanor. “Oh I most certainly did. To be honest, I didn’t know you had it in you.”

He grins as well, mischief appearing. “Didn’t have it in me to do what? To make you say my name like a prayer?” You smack his arm, a small oof leaving his lips. “You know what I mean.” You look down to his chest, focusing on the purple glow coming from it. “... but that too I suppose.” 

“If it’s any consolation, I was very nervous.” You cast your eyes back at him, shock strung on your face. His eyes focus on you, the softness of his gaze making your heartbeat just a tad faster. “All I want is to love you properly, and it is my duty to ensure that you receive that love in full. If I couldn’t love you in moments of intimacy, I think I’d go mad.” 

His nervous admission was precious, and it made you happy. Joshua and you have been close for so long, and to know he had felt just as nervous soothes you. You bring your hands to his forehead, brushing the strands of sweaty hair away. You then cup his cheeks and bring his head down for a gentle kiss. Leaning your head against his forehead, you let your hands travel to the beautiful hair at the nape of his neck. “I promise you I have never felt so loved in my life.” You place another kiss on his lips. “Only you can love me in the way that I need.” You kiss the apples of his cheeks. “You could never disappoint me, especially when the love I receive comes from you.” You then kiss right under his ear lobe and speak in a whisper. “And if it's any consolation, I didn’t sense your nervousness. You exude confidence.” You snicker a little bit, causing Joshua to pull away to look at you. “Especially since you tried to basically fold me in half.”

Joshua groans, and throws half his body on you, head hiding into your neck and an arm around your torso. You throw your head back into the pillow, laughing fully with your chest. Joshua lightly smacks your backside, more as a signal to quiet down as to not wake anyone rather than in embarrassment. You start wheezing as you try to calm down, the memory of Joshua trying to push your legs back against your body making it hard to. It had caused you to curse out, a muscle pulled in your thigh and him apologizing profusely as he massaged it back to good health. Looking back, you know it would be a silly memory you both could laugh at.

“I’m sorry I didn’t mean to.” Joshua says, his voice muffled as he buries his face deeper. “I admit I got carried away.”

You chuckle. “I know I’m flexible, just not THAT flexible.” 

You feel him vibrate as his muffled laugh travels before he sits back up into his last position, only letting his hand go to the marks he had left on your neck and chest. He traces them, circling his fingertip on each hickey he had brought to light. “Maybe I really did get carried away…” You can barely hear him, his voice almost nonexistent as he mutters. “Do they hurt?”

You are taken aback, a little surprised he would even ask that given that he had a few hickeys on his neck as well and scratch marks that run along his back. Your silence convinces him and he places his hand over the mark above your collarbone, an orange glow lighting around his hand. It takes you a minute before you smack his hand away, shaking your head vigorously. “Don’t you dare try and remove the marks you blessed me with. Do you not like seeing them?”

“No, of course not.” Joshua says quickly, hand still in the air after you’d smacked it away. “I apologize for my hastiness.”  

You take his hand, kissing the back of it before putting his palm against your face. “I’m in no pain, I can assure you.” Your other hand goes to trace the purplish pink blemishes on his neck, copying his earlier movements. “Would you want to get rid of yours?”

“Absolutely not.” He speaks immediately, a shiver running down his spine as you push on one of his hickeys, the ache feeling more like bliss. You hum, engaging in his reaction. You love how sensitive he is; every touch and stroke upon his body makes him squirm in your hold. It is endearing, as well as mesmerizing. 

“If you keep touching me like that, you won’t be getting that break.” Joshua breathes out, both enjoying your touches and cursing you for the hold you have on him; his will being shaped by your gestures.

You feign innocence, acting like what he said didn’t have an effect on you. You continue touching his chest as the hand still holding onto his lets go to grip on his waist, squeezing his skin causing him to jolt with a gasp. “Hey!” 

You laugh and continue to do it, making him laugh hysterically as you tickle him. He tries grabbing for your hand, but your previously occupied hand on his chest grabs his hands, holding onto both of them as you continue your attack. He releases grunts and is moving his body frantically to try and get away. Next thing you both know, he is on the floor.

“Oh Founder! Are you okay?” You panic, climbing off the bed to see the damage you caused. 

With a sigh, Joshua smiles. “I’m alive, even after your attempt to murder me.”

“I would do no such thing!” You huff before pulling him up. You both are, once again, laying back down on the bed flat on your backs. The sleepiness is starting to set in and you can feel your eyes start to shut, when all of a sudden you feel hot air hitting your ear. You turn your head, eyes fully shut. “What?”

“Lie closer to me.” 

“Our shoulders are literally touching.” You say, sleep seeping into your words.

Joshua groans. “You know what I mean. Let me hold you.”

Without a peep from you, Joshua rolls you to your side so you face him and brings you into his arms. He squeezes you to him, cradling your head in one arm and the other pushing your body into his. You groan, the heat from his body heating yours to almost unbearable lengths. “You’re too hot.”

He chuckles. “I don’t care. You are going to let me embrace you after the number you did on me.”

“I didn’t mean to push you off the bed.” You whine, kicking your feet against his legs to get back at him for his attitude.

He chuckles and reaches down to your butt, giving it a light squeeze.“I was talking about our love making but that’s a good excuse too.”

“Can I adjust at least?” You ask, already starting to shift. Joshua hums and lays on his back, letting you scoot into side. Arm around his torso and the other held close to your chest, you lay your head down against his chest. His heartbeat is steady; a calming rhythm that’s lulling you to sleep.

Joshua watches as you slip away, sweet hums vibrating from your chest as you sleep. All he can think is how pretty you look in your sleep, especially with your messy post-sex hair and slightly swollen lips. He could watch you sleep forever, but sleep was starting to take hold of him as well. He kisses your forehead, whispering a goodnight before he enters dreamland.

And you both sleep soundly as signs of life start to pick up outside; with shops getting ready for the day and the hustle and bustle of people taking the streets of Dalimil. 

[tiredwitchplant]

Everything You Need to Know About Crystals: Bloodstone

Bloodstone (The Blood of Purification)

Color: Green with bright red splatter. Some have white mixed in

Rarity: Easy to obtain

Hardiness: 7

Type: Chalcedony

Chakra Association: Root, Heart, Solar Plexus, and Sacral

Deities: Brigid, Dione, Persephone, Christ (believed to be his blood in Christian mythology)

Birthstone: March

Astrological Signs: Aries, Pisces, Libra

Element: Fire

Planet: Mars

Origin: Australia, Brazil, China, India, USA

Powers: Open Doors and Remove Walls, Prosperity, Strength, Courage, Purification, Vitality

Crystals It Works Well With: Red jasper, Black Tourmaline, Hematite, Amethyst

How It is Created: Bloodstone is a variety of chalcedony quartz with a distinctive dark green color combined with specks and clumps of red jasper inclusions

History: The distinct blood red marks within the stone are often used for talismans because it is believed that the stone protect one from evil spirits. In medieval times, it was believed the blood specks came from the blood of Christ while he was being crucified as his blood dripped down onto the rocks. Legends such as the tale of Percival, one of King Arthur’s knights who went on the quest for the Holy Grail, illustrate the combined qualities of bloodstone. Percival was a knight trained in the physical aspects of combat, but his quest took him into the spiritual realms, teaching him lessons about illusion and the power of unconditional love. In ancient times, it was believed that this stone could heal, banish negativity, and guide people who were lost. It was worn by warriors on their arms to help heal wounds during battle and to stop the bleeding quickly. It was also worn on the breast of a warrior to feel them with courage and strength. It was said to keep their morals high, even after very heavy casualties.

What It Can Do:

Banish evil spirits and negativity

Heal wounds and one’s mental state

Used to draw money and increase wealth

Clams fear and anger

Ensures victories in legal battles

Balances and ground the energy in one’s heart to promote action

Gives courage and teaches on how to avoid dangerous situations

Heal the ancestral line

Benefits blood-rich organs, regulates and supports blood-flow, and aids in circulation

Egyptians believed it shrank tumors

How to Get the Best Out Of: Wearing it as a bracelet or something on the arm area and a necklace near the heart is a great way to utilize bloodstone to its full potential as it works well near the bloodstream and blood-rich organs like the heart.

How to Cleanse and Charge: Cleanse it by running it under water or bury it in your garden for a deeper clean. Charge it by placing it under a full moon or using green and red candles around it.

Crystal Grid:

General Well Being

Layout: Lemniscate

1 clearing crystal

1 light-bringing crystal

1 immune-balancing crystal

Crystals to Use:

Bloodstone

Green Aventurine

Que Sera (Llanoite)

Quantum Quattro

Cherry, Rose, Smoky, or Emerald Quartz

Hold your crystals in your hands and state your intention for the grid.

Lie down.

Place a clearing crystal beneath your feet (sit up to do so).

Place a light-bringing crystal above your head.

Place an immune-balancing crystal halfway up your breastbone over the

higher heart chakra.

Use the power of your mind to connect the lemniscate over and around you.

Remain in the grid for five to fifteen minutes, focusing your attention and breathing gently

into the immune-balancing crystal. If you become aware of energy that needs to shift out of

your body, send it down to the crystal at your feet for transmutation.

Remove the crystals in the reverse order in which you laid them, then cleanse them

Heart and Immune System

Layout: Lemniscate

1 grounding crystal for the feet

1 pinkish-burgundy crystal or immune stimulator

1 emerald-green crystal or immune soother

Crystals to Use:

Emerald

Emerald Quartz

Fuchsite

Cherry Quartz

Rose Quartz

Ruby

Garnet

Green Aventurine

Lepidolite

Bloodstone

Que Sera

Quantum Quattro

Hematite Quartz

Hold your crystals in your hands and state your intention for the grid.

Sit down on the floor.

Place a grounding crystal at your feet.

Lie down fully.

Place one crystal above the heart on the higher heart

(thymus) chakra.

Place one over the heart seed at the base of the breastbone.

Check your heartbeat—it will quickly indicate which crystal should be placed above, and which below. If your heartbeat feels too rapid or is pounding heavily, or if it feels too slow and heavy, switch the crystals around.

Use the power of your mind or a crystal wand to trace the lemniscate, crossing the circles over your heart.

If dizziness results, breathe deeply and send the energy down toward the crystal at your feet for transmutation.

When the layout is complete, remove the crystals in the reverse order in which you laid them. Stand up slowly and ground yourself by stamping your feet.

Sources

[jtl-fics]

Is there still time to ask for tbd?

WIP Wednesday 9/4/24 (Closed) | TBD AU (15/20)

“Oh yes, how’s her pregnancy moving along? We are always so focused at work that I rarely have the mind to ask.” Jackson starts to lead Aaron away from the Court and up towards where Matthew was sitting with Wren. 

Jackson looked over his shoulder and shot Andrew a wink.

His brother was in good hands.

“Why were you so late?!” Dion demands drawing his attention back to the Court.

“Needed to help my brother.” Andrew answers.

Dion pouts but his gaze shifts to where Orion was reading a story with Ophellia, “Ok…” he says.

[absolutebl]

54 BLs Announced for 2023 that didn't happen

Here if you list of BLs announced for 2023 that didn't happen and for which I have no word on whether they'll release in 2024 instead.

I've put the ones I really regret didn't get made in bold.

If they actually happened and I just missed it please let me know in a comment with the place you watched it. Thanks!

Organized by country!

Cambodia

My Croissant

trailer - announced 4/2023

China

Couple or Not

From Durian Culture Production this was suposed to be an A/B/O. Gui Ming who swaps consciousness with himself in a parallel universe. In that universe he is married to his rival Shi Youtian.

Desire the series

Another one that was supposed to be A/B/O The story of Bai Lan, a young man who wants Mr. Shen, a proud alpha, to be his omega. According to the casting announcement ‘Desire’ will consist of 24 episodes with 45 minutes runtime per episode.

Japan

Boys Love Omegaverse (Boys Love Sequel)

Announced for 6/9/2023 but never aired. This seems to just be borrowing the branding and have nothing to do with either BL originals since it's about 4 men in an idol group.

Given the series (remake)

Fuji TV announced and episodic series focuses on Ritsuka as he rediscovers his love for music thanks to Mafuyu. Given the Movie focused on their bandmates, Akihiko-Haruki, and their tumultuous relationship. The storyline for this second film involves Ritsuka temporarily joining Hiiragi and Shizusumi’s band, and the tension that brings to his new relationship with Mafuyu. It will also delve into the relationship between Hiiragi and Shizusumi.

Takumi-kun Series 6: Nagai Nagai Monogatari no Hajimari no Asa

remake of the first movie

Korea

Blueming 2 AKA Blueming Season 2

This was one of my favorites from 2022 year (9/10). I’m not thrilled about this. It’s the same director as TMS2, and I didn’t like that one all that much either. Still, I’m always intersted in where Korea goes when it’s given enough rope to hang itself.

Choco Milk Shake 2

Strongberry

First Love's User Manual (TutorYim) Silkwood (Peach Of Time)

Heesu In Class 2

was to air 2023 03.02

Korea's gay version of Sex Education. Heesu’s world revolves around Chanyoung, his best friend and secret crush. He doesn’t mind cheering Chanyoung from the sidelines or listening to all his girl problems. He doesn’t care if people only know him as “Chanyoung’s friend.” Then one day, Heesu starts hearing his name everywhere. On the bus, in the halls, during lunch… Turns out, there’s a rumor going around school (Got a love problem? Find Heesu in Class 2 and he’ll tell you what to do!) and with that, Heesu suddenly finds himself the center of attention. But how could he give anyone advice? He doesn’t even know what to do about his own crush!

Jump the series

From SOL Entertainment (producers of Cherry Blossoms and others) for Gaga. Coming-of-age drama that 'jumps' to the next chapters of life: love, friendship, competition, mistakes, dreams and hopes.

Love Supremacy Zone

Best on a novel and 29 year old man wakes up in a 19 year old's body and has to make his friend happy or die

Wuju Bakery AKA Space Bakery (JeffBarcode)

Silkwood and Be On Cloud partnered for this. ‘Wuju Bakery’ was originally scheduled to be released in 2024, but changes in the production house’ schedule showed that it would air sooner in November 2023, and then it didn't. The drama stars Thai actors Jeff Satur and Barcode Tinnasit and Korean actors Dion and Jun In-Kyu (Q) About a spaceship that crash-lands into and destroys a bakery shop. Of course this means the alien and the baker end up living together. At the same time, other aliens-in-hiding all around the city start hunting for them. One of my most anticipated BLs. It sounds SO WEIRD.

Taiwan

First Note Of Love

Was casting 5/2023. About a singer with stage fright and his timid fan

Pray in Love

From SoulChill (the producers of Innocent) the illegitimate son of a mafia family and his policeman boyfriend who's lives get upended when one has an arranged marriage and the other a promotion.

The Only One

Based on a novel Mou Mou from the Your Name Engraved Herein folks, high school set stepbrothers trope!

Wishing Upon The Shooting Stars

Reunion country set romances from director Ryan Jiang: My Tooth Your Love, and WBL.

Thailand

2 Worlds (MaxNat)

Domundi announced parallel worlds love triangle story with MaxNat as the leads (finally!) PuPa & Kram are in love but PuPa is murdered and Kram is pulled into a parallel world. In that place, 12 years ago, Kram & Tai were in love but Kram was killed by Tai's dad. Now Tai encounters the Kram from another world, what will happen next? Is this a second chance or is Kram sill morning his dead lover, and does Tai need to help him get home or convince him to stay?

4 Minutes (BibleBuild)

Be On Cloud announced original story written by Sammon (Manner of Death/Triage) especially for them… described as a ‘bitter’ drama. When asked if there are many love scenes, Bible said yes! It was planned for the 4th quarter of 2023. Didn't happen.

7 Times 4 Days

Arton A Bangkoks The story of ‘Won’ a 27-year-old Korean teacher who travels to Thailand on an exchange program. Stays with his mother’s friend who has an 18 year old high schoolson.They get closer.

Acadex

Star Hunter announced this may bot be bl? The Eclipse + Destiny Seeker + Harry Potter 4 + The CW.

After Sundown (ZeeNew)

Mandee announced for 7/15/2023 Phra Plerng and Rawee enter into an arranged marriage. The two have to solve mysteries according to the scholars’ prophecy, but the twist is, if 6 months passes and their relationship hasn’t progressed, Rawee will have to break the engagement immediately.

Big Dragon 2 the movie (concludes the series)

Star Hunter announced.

Boy Never Smiles (KimCop)

Follows the story of a young man who travels to the future. To return, he must make that boy smile.

Boyy of God

announced for 11/2023 about the lives and loves of a group of Christian boys that play together on a water polo team.

Chiang Mai Adventures From Wayufilm for subscribers only, a travel romance. Aired as a film on YT here.

Cinderella Boys

From Cloth Lab who brought us Restated (which I never watched and never got EngSub).

Close Friend 3 Soju Bomb

sampler pack VIU ? new cast from seasons 1 & 2 group of friends who traveled to Korea with dreams of becoming idols. Unfortunately, they don’t debut, so they invite each other to get drunk before they return to Thailand. during this night, several events transpire that change the course of their friendships

Deep Night

MCOTHD30 was casting this 4/2023

Flirt Milk

Star Hunter announced this Y-novel adaptation standard pop fodder, but they are cute. One boy accuses another of breaking up his relationship to pursue his gf, but it's not the gf the boy was into.

Friend. Boyfriend

The series depicts Aum and Nack who are best friends and co-workers at a bar. Their personalities are very different, one is quiet and caring, the other is a laid back playboy. Mew is a newly recruited staff member at the bar, he is good looking, talkative and it doesn’t take long for him to grab the attention of Nack. This creates tensions at the workplace as Aum realizes he has more than platonic feelings for Nack, forcing Nack to choose between the two.

Future From Me

Was casting 5/2023 One boy secretly in love with another since middle school.

Heart by Heart

Half Toast Production adaptation of the y-novel of the same name, the trailers are GOOD. I’m more excited for this one then I thought I'd be. Has a bit of Tasty Florida, bad boy/good boy, high drama going on.

Hot Bamee and Yummy Gyogung

9Cats Studio was to brign us this starring Nutt Witsarut (Daisy from SCOY) as Gyogung & Boat Yongyut (Tim from My Secret Love) as Bamee.

Lost in the Woods

Fifa, a high school student preparing to enter university, is given the duty of taking care of his grandma in the province before the school year starts. There he meets Chief Hem, a forest ranger.

Love Puzzle AKA Plengrak AKA Pleng Prai Love Puzzle

From KOB Entertainment set in the same universe as Chains of Heart (SIGH). BUT Noh Phouluang is in this so you know I will watch it but it looks like it'll be a hot MESS. A new exchange student has a one night stand on the night of his arrival, turns out the boy is a senior in his new uni department.

Love Syndrome – The Beginning prequel

Tells how the couples from Love Syndrome met originally.

Mystique in the Mirror

Side couple is PitchBank from Golden Blood, authored by Dr. Dr.Patrick Rangsimat (My Ride) interview here.

Nilundon

Announced for 12.29.2023 didn't air. Postponed from 2021 to recast one of the leads, never a good sign.

Punk Spy

Domundi trying out Tommy (formerly JimmyTommy) to star opposite Thomas Teetut (new talent). OMG are we gona call them TomTom? Please people. Please? Small town romance of two people who keep secrets. And they are searching for the truth. Poppy (everyone’s favorite comedic character actor) is in this one too.

Rule No.1: Don't Be too Emotional

Oxin brings us a Korean novel (by Hwang Seol!) adaptation, freshman realized his senior is hiding dark secrets. Was casting 4/2023

Sunset Vibes

Star Hunter reusing the Big Dragon pair as a one night stand but uh-oh he’s my boss, adapted from a web series! I’m game. Trailer here.

The Chinese Family (working title)

GDH to star Billkin of ITSAY

The D Project (working title)

GDH to star PP Krit of ITSAY

The Internship

This Wayufilm short film was set to premiere in June 2023 on their YouTube Channel. The storyline follows an intern who encounters a ghost at his workplace.

The Outing Series (Max Nattapol & TopTap)

BL sub plot within a story of 3 families that manage a top advertising agency. Anan, Phupha & Taurus take their families & close employees for an annual outing at a resort. There, the dark secrets of 22 people with different views on love and relationships are revealed.

True Moon

Star Hunter to do yet another loosely disguised attempt at the 2 Moon franchise? Trailer here.

Two Worlds (MaxNat)

Lakorn style, Phupha and Khram love each other but later Phupha is murdered. However, something happens and Khram is pulled to a parallel world where, 12 years ago, Khram and Thai were in love. However, Khram was killed by Thai’s dad.

Waterboyy 3 AKA Waterboys (KaownahTurbo)

not a remake. Why do they not cast Est Supha in one of these? That's the real quetion. Ram, a young fisherman from the country after he gets accepted into the most prestigious swimming academy in the country. Ram has a hard time fitting in with the high society students that populate the school because he didn’t grow up in a life of privilege. Luckily he has Q to protect him during these trying times.

Wish Me Luck

Be Brave Entertainment Hub to produce this BL about a boss and his temporary employee in an advertising company, based on Bittersweet's y-novel of the same name สุดที่รักษ์. Starring my boy Fiat (Grean Fictions, SOTUS S, My Gear and Your Gown, Triage) who I’ve been waiting to lead a BL for a decade (it feels like) and Na Naphat (KinnPorsche, UWMA). Trailer here.

Wish You Luck

StudioCommuan Sci Fi dystopian BL about a luck-stealer and an optimistic innocent. Trailer here.

Y-Moment

Mflow consortium piece of some kind.

(source)

Okay that's it. I won't be updating this I don't think, so make sure to comment with any corrections.

[theycalledmebaby]

LOVERS AND FRIENDS

| steve harrington x fem!reader | 18+

-END OF THE ROAD

summary: flashback to the first time Steve Harrington made you cry.

warnings: angst.no smut. typical middle school bullying? mention of shitty dads. not edited.

series masterlist | series mixtape(coming soon)

October 2002

7th grade, end of the school day. Boys II Men’s “End of the Road” plays on the radio, sending chills down your spine. You’re trying to keep your composure as your mom asks how your day was, battling back tears. It’s a cruel twist of fate that this song is playing right now. Not only is it the end of your friendship with Steve, but this was one of the few songs you both agreed on.

Growing up, your tastes in music diverged—you leaned toward hip-hop and R&B, thanks to your younger parents, while Steve Harrington was all about pop. Backstreet Boys, NSYNC, Britney Spears, Celine Dion—those were his favorites. Despite your differing tastes, you both shared a love for movies and cheesy drama TV series. Except during his weird Titanic phase when he made you watch it every weekend, or the fact he hated horror movies, which drove you crazy since you loved them.

Steve’s parents were strict about the media he consumed, while your mom, being younger and more lenient, wasn’t as restrictive. This meant Steve was always reporting back about your music choices or horror flicks, especially when Eddie Munson was around.

You met Eddie when you were eight—he was your mom's best friend’s kid, and since your mom often babysat Steve, the three of you were inseparable. Steve and Eddie got along well, but Steve’s jealousy over your friendship with Eddie often led to him tattling on your movie nights.

Yes, Steve Harrington, once a nerdy, goody-two-shoes tattletale, evolved into the King Steve everyone adored. But Steves's sensitive side, the one where he'd cry during The Lion King and learn Grease dance moves with you, was never truly hidden. He’d hold your hand during thunderstorms, kiss your scraped knees, and walk you to class every day, always reassuring you when you cried.

Steve was your first in many ways—the first best friend, the first boy to kiss you, but also the first to make you cry and break your heart.

The first time Steve broke your heart was when he started dating Nancy Wheeler in the second semester of sophomore year. That’s another story. But the first time he made you cry was in 7th grade when he called you ugly in front of all the 7th and 8th graders, including your crush, Tommy Hagan. Steve humiliated you on purpose.

Since last summer, after you told him Billy Hargrove asked you to be his girlfriend, Steve’s been a dick. You’re not sure why—he didn’t seem to dislike Billy back then, though he does now, thanks to their fight.

When Billy broke up with you, the first week of 6th grade, he did it in front of everyone at early morning break. He almost made you cry. And Steve sucker punched him. It was the first fistfight Steve had ever been in. Billy gave him a black eye. They both got lunch detention for a week and Steve wouldn't talk to you for a couple of weeks after that but said it was just because he was grounded.

 Since then he’s become a complete asshole to you, and you get it. He’s becoming more popular, you two have different interests, and that's okay. Friends grow apart, but you never expect this from him. For his words to hurt so bad. To embarrass you like that in front of everyone. Just like Billy did. Just like Eddie did that day in the park.

Fuck boys. 

—----------------------------------------------------------------------------

You hear your mom saying something to you, but you're too focused on the lyrics. 

Although we’ve come to the end of the road, still I can’t go. Why does this stupid song have to be playing right now? You think to yourself as the tears stream down your face now. You couldn’t believe him.

You two had gotten into an argument in your last period and Steve commented that you are probably just obsessed with him and jealous. You blew up on him and said some pretty mean things and so does Steve. 

“oh get over yourself Steve Harrington, like I would ever want to be with someone as lame as you. Why don’t you go fix your stupid hair”

 “Yeah well, no one would ever wanna be with you, 'cause you’re crazy and.. and ..and ugly!  Everyone knows Billy Hargrove only went out with you 'cause he felt sorry for you!” No one wants to be around you! Thats why your  step dad never sticks around and...and why your real dad didn't stick around!

You didn’t respond. The tears in your eyes were evident, and the classroom fell silent as the teacher walked in. Thankfully the bell rang, and you grabbed your backpack, and left without a word when Heather and Robin called after you. It was all a blur.

Steve cried himself to sleep that night. You were once his best friend, and he had promised your mom he’d always take care of you. How could he say such things? He had always thought you were perfect—the prettiest girl he’d ever seen. The comment about your dads made him sick. He was ashamed and scared to apologize sooner, worried about how you’d react and fearing he’d get in trouble with your parents, who you hadn’t told, but he didn't know that.

You eventually forgave him, but things were never the same. You’d say hi in the hallways or chat online, but the closeness was gone.

That was the first time Steve Harrington made you cry. Unfortunately, it wouldn’t be the last.

[nd-of-a-manatee]

What if:

Raz's acrobatics change over time.

Because it serves a different purpose now, y'know?

The Aquatos are performers. Their movements are supposed to be exaggerated, rhythmic, and artistic. Form over function to please an audience.

As a Psychonaut, Raz largely uses his skills for traversal, combat, and focusing psychic energy. It's an advantage for his movements to be so quick and concentrated that his enemy hardly has time to react to--let alone see--what he's doing. And to help him dodge blows to the face. It almost becomes a form of martial art.

So imagine his family's surprise when Dion challenges him to prove that he hasn't let himself get rusty, and Raz sends himself sailing clear through the tent and into a lake.

[jerseyshoresy]

You’re On Thin Ice, Buddy

FLUFF

Shoresy teaches you to ice skate!

Shoresy x gn reader

Warnings: cussing

“What the fuck do you mean, you’ve never been ice skating?” Shoresy was looking at you with such incredulity that you had to look away in embarrassment. He continued his tirade while skating back and forth in front of you as you watched from the bench.

“You’re Canadian, for fuck’s sake! Never been on the ice. Your parents should be arrested. That’s fucking shameful.”

You were expecting a strong response from your longtime friend (and crush), but this was just absurd.

“So what I’ve never been on the ice? It’s not that unheard of. You’re acting like I told you I have a secret third arm or never heard Celine Dion,” you argued to yourself, realizing Shoresy was gone. Sighing, you took in your surroundings. You always wanted to skate, especially in a rink like this, but you were too afraid. You had gotten teased in the past about your lack of experience skating, yet it never bothered you until Shoresy gave you shit for it today. You knew teasing was all in good fun for him but you just couldn’t shake the heartache from his accusatory tone. You got up to leave the rink and catch up with Shoresy later when all of a sudden he came skating over to you.

“Y/n! Look at what I found!” He held up a pair of battered skates. “Size (insert here), ready to go.”

You would’ve been beyond flattered that he somehow remembered your shoe size if you weren’t too busy focusing on not throwing up all over yourself from nervousness.

“Shoresy, I’m not sure this is a good idea. I’m really not that balanced and—“

“Y/n,” he replied, a hand grasping your shoulder, “you can do this. There’s no better feeling than being on the ice. I want you to experience that too.”

You felt yourself melting in his eager gaze. Before you knew it, you were all laced up and gingerly standing on the blades. Shoresy slowly coaxed you out from the bench and onto the actual rink where you began to slowly but surely make your way around the edge.

“See? You got it so far. You’re doing good.” His words of affirmation and hand on yours made your face warm up with a blush. You made a few more circles around the rink and you were finally starting to get the hang of it.

“Okay. I’m gonna try it by myself now,” you said, reluctantly letting go of Shoresy’s hand. You never realized how empty your own hand felt until you missed the touch of the man you came to love. Taking in a deep breath for encouragement, you pushed off with your skates. You savored the feeling of the slight breeze on your face as you skated around the rink. After a few slow laps you made your way back to Shoresy. You decided since your lessons had gone well so far, you could speed up a fair amount. Everything was going well until the last few seconds. One moment you were upright and laughing, and the next you were tumbling down, on your way to meet the ice with your face. You didn’t even have time to react before you felt a strong grip hoist you up as your knee smacked against the ice.

“Holy fuck, y/n, are you alright?” Shoresy anxiously eyed you up and down, taking in any injuries you might have acquired. You felt tears well in your eyes but you were determined to keep them at bay.

“I’m okay. Can we go sit down for a second, please? I think I really hurt my knee.”

Shoresy nodded and helped you skate over to the bench. As you sat down, he took note of your inability to do anything without little groans of pain. Wordlessly, he scooped you up and brought you to the locker room. After setting you down on the bench carefully, he unlaced your skates and brought you an ice pack. As he sat on the bench next to you, he picked up your leg and placed it on his lap.

“I’m gonna feel around your knee to see where it’s bruised. Let me know if it hurts too much, okay?”

You nodded, your heart pounding with anxiety due to your injury and the closeness of Shoresy. You felt your breath hitch as his fingers began sliding over your knee. All your worries were immediately put to rest—you couldn’t believe he was handling you with such care. Your heart was fluttering in your chest from his ghostly soft touches. You never wanted this moment to end, but you were pulled from your enchantment when he broke the comfortable silence.

“Good news is, nothing serious. Fuck’s sake though, y/n, you scared me, and I don’t say that often. I thought you were gonna take a tumble and hit your head. I don’t know what I would do if you got hurt.” You weren’t sure exactly what he meant by that so you decided to take a leap of faith.

“Shoresy,” you half whispered, “thank you for today. All of it. And I mean it.” You glanced at his lips, then slowly started to lean in. He quickly took the hint and met your lips with his own. You felt like there were fireworks going off in your stomach as he deepened the kiss, gripping your waist and the back of your neck. After what felt like the shortest yet longest moment of your life, you two finally pulled away for air, lips still slightly parted.

“Yeah, so…,” Shoresy said, a bit flustered, but you just smiled.

“Now that my knee’s all busted, I need someone to drive me home. And I may need someone who’s already proven themselves as a very capable man to nurse me back to health.” This time it was Shoresy’s turn to smile (that missing tooth make you fall even harder for him, it’s just so charming!).

“Do I get to wear a sexy nurse outfit?”

“You can wear whatever you want as long as I get a break from ice skating for at least a year.”

“Deal.”

[chthonic-cassandra]

Recent books, fiction -

Emma Cline, The Girls - a teenage girl in the late 1960's ends up on the outer edges of a Manson-like (very closely Manson-like) cult. This was okay, but not great, falling too often into cliches about teenage girlhood and lacking a sharp understanding of cult dynamics. By basing the fictional cult in the novel so closely on Charles Manson's Cline gets to handwave a bunch of things about how and why it works, but the seams in the construction show through anyway; Cline's understanding about what leads people to join and stay in these kinds of groups, and how the internal dynamics function, seemed to me persistently surface-level. The strongest part of the novel is the protagonist's potent desire for one of the closest inner circle girls in the cult, which is the reason she becomes entangled much more than any draw from the cult leader himself. There was something interesting there, if Cline had focused on it, and something interesting too in the hints about our protagonist's solitary experiences of lesbian masochistic desire, but this thread was resolved in a way that felt to me disappointingly simplistic. The hints about our protagonist's adulthood following her experience of the cult are also flat, without the messiness of what it can mean to survive that experience. Worth reading as an example of a fictional depiction of organized abuse, but not a great one.

Mona Simpson, Commitment - family saga novel following three siblings as they make lives for themselves following their mother's depressive breakdown and institutionalization in the early 1970's. This had some flashes of clarity and insight, but fizzled out quickly into banality. There were some things that Simpson wanted to say about pragmatism vs making art, and about living in fear of mental illness, but it all got sanded down. The depiction of 'mental illness' is also two dimensional at best. This suffered especially for me in proximity to a recent read-through of The Frederica Quartet, which deals with some similar themes with an incomparably greater level of complexity and beauty. While this novel wasn't terrible, the fact of how lauded it has been made me feel cynical about the state of contemporary literary fiction.

Dion Fortune, Moon Magic - a hilarious but less than successful chapter in my weird journey of reading Fortune's fiction work. Like The Sea Priestess, to which it is a loose sequel, this novel centers around a blatant Dion Fortune self-insert initiating a repressed professional man into sexualized spiritual enlightenment. Unlike The Sea Priestess, Moon Magic is told largely from the point of view of said Dion Fortune self-insert, which brings the narcissism levels up to the nearly intolerable. Left unfinished at Fortune's death, the final chapter was written by her friends which was also not a great choice.

Melody Razak, Moth - a left-leaning, intellectual family in Delhi struggles to cope with the cataclysmic violence of partition. Stepping back from this book there are elements of it, and of the way each character was drawn, which I appreciate, but I felt consistently uneasy reading it, so much that I put it aside for a week in the middle, which is unusual for me. There was something about Razak's narrative gaze which felt exoticizing in its hazy simplicity; this maybe has to do with her conviction to "tell the untold stories" of women who experienced violence during partition, which I don't think is ever a great way to go into a fiction project for reasons I have written about elsewhere. However, the intensely brutal violence of the final section of the book somehow landed for me more as a reader; I don't actually know how I feel about the representational ethics of it, but something about the extremity brought it to a narratively more effective place. I'm still trying to sort through why.

Stacey D'Erasmo, The Complicities - after her husband's conviction for fraudulent business practices, a woman moves to a town in New England, opens a massage practice, and gets emotionally involved with a beached whale. Ugh. This was very bad, and I don't know how it ended up on my to-read list. Flat, simplistic prose style, irritating narrative voice, unlikable characters. Whatever.

Kikuo Tsumura, There's No Such Thing As an Easy Job (trans. Polly Barton) - genuinely hilarious satire on Japanese capitalist culture. A young woman, burnt out on her previous job (the nature of which isn't revealed until the end, which was an effective choice for me and so I'm not spoiling it), seeks to find a form of employment that will require the least possible from her intellectually and emotionally, ending up in increasing surreal work situations. This kind of book often doesn't work for me (I'm not a big humor person), but this was sharp and understated and very good. The section at the cracker factory in particular had me trying ineffectively to explain its hilarity to people around me. Recommended.

Catherine Lacey, Biography of X - in an AU United States where the southern states seceded in the mid-twentieth century, a newly widowed woman attempts to find out the truth about her wife, a notoriously secretive and manipulative artist. This was ambitious in its metafictional conceit and had a premise that intrigued but ultimately didn't live up to its promise. The world-building of Lacey's AU felt implausible and insufficiently developed; there were so many aspects of it that didn't land, like the distracting use of real-life figures or the total lack of critical analysis around race and gender. If the AU premise had been removed and the focus kept tighter on the central relationship it might have worked, but there too we just didn't have enough to go off of. This mostly just made me wish I was rereading Siri Hutvedt's The Blazing World, a much, much stronger metafictional depiction of a female artist, which maybe I should do.

Mariana Enríquez, Our Share of the Night - in Argentina during the period of military dictatorship, a young father attempts to save his son from the abusive group of which he has been a part since childhood. I loved this book so so very much. As a horror novel, as a depiction of organized abuse and intergenerational trauma, as a representation of the ways that state and interpersonal violence repeat and mirror. It's not a perfect book - I think that the last third could be tightened and shifted in certain ways - but what it's doing is so strong and specific that I don't mind. I sort of want to buy a copy and reread it right away. Strongly recommended, with the content note that it is a very emotionally plausible and unsparing depiction of its subject material.