#so anyway im a ninja turtle fan now-

[bulbabutt]

don can't sleep and needs a second opinion. good thing raphie's always there and knows exactly how to help

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[peachy-wolfhard]

Dating Leo II

a/n: I wanted to add more after I posted part one so here it is Bone Apple Teeth, I love leo sm so its LONG

Let me know if you would like to be on my tmnt taglist!

Warnings: swearing, grandchildren mention (splinter is gonna splinter), illness mention, insomnia, mentions of slapping leos bald head

Word count: 738 -woof

Insomnia gang

This turtle physically cannot sleep

When you don't spend the night he is CONSTANTLY texting you everything that comes to mind

“y/n…why is pizza a circle?” “idk lee can i come over :3” “yeth pls HURRY IM DYING HERE WITHOUT U”

Lying in his bed, cuddling, matching eyemasks ON, fan ON

Even with all of that, nothing works

The nights that the both of you are actually able to sleep he has a grasp on you

Holds you so close to him all the time, you guys are joined at the hip

Everyone besides Mikey and Splinter thinks you guys are gross

“You can't even say their names apart now it's ALWAYS Leo and y/n. You can't separate them they will DIE without each other”

“Calm down Mikey please you're scaring Shelldon”

Splinter is…well Splinter. He stays in your guys' relationship, with how dramatic you guys are he doesn't need his soaps

He loves to show you baby pictures of the boys esp the ones of Leo

((cough cough he definitely mentions grandchildren like the old man he is))

Bites all the time like anytime anywhere

Making breakfast peacefully listening to music- CHOMP

Getting ready for work- CHOMP

Dr. Delicate Touch has to intervene

Play fights with you in slow-motion

(slow motion voice) “yyy/nnn iiiimm goooinggg tooo kick your aaaasssss”

(also slow motion voice) “im gooonnnaaa kick yours firrrst”

HAND! HOLDING!

Initially, it started as a way to keep Leo from running off when exploring places, but then it turned into a regular thing

“My love, light of my life, future spouse eHEM!”

“What Leo”

“WHERE’S YOUR HAND I AM GOING TO DIE WITHOUT YOUR HAND IN MINE!! I ALREADY FEEL WEAK PLEASE I AM SUFFERING”

Absolute drama queen and don't get me started when he’s sick

Picture those old paintings of the sick children in bed, he’s that but dialed up to eleven

All he wants is cuddles and daytime television and don't you DARE come in between him and his Maury

Giving him medicine is surprisingly easy maybe it’s because he’s so out of it or maybe he’s just in love he’d let you do anything to him

But if you’re ever sick he does the exact same for you

If you fight medicine (just like me fr) he’s NOT afraid to use those ninja moves to get you to take your meds

Loves it when you read to him no matter what you are reading

Manga? Sign him up! Horror book? Let's get spooky! Sad book? I'll get the tissues! He just loves to hear your voice especially if you do different voices for the characters but not overly comedic voices, he’s here for the story!

Falls asleep listening to your voice with his head on your lap 99% of the time

Going to the Hidden City for date nights and getting up to absolute mischief

(having to then call Raph to come get you guys because you pissed someone off and just kicked their butt)

Speaking of the Hidden City! During their break in the Hidden City (when everyone gets arrested) you join Leo at the spa

After he gets kicked out he BEGS you to go to the creepy spa across the street with him

“Sorry sweetheart I too am in DIRE need of some relaxation plus it’s not often I’m in an exclusive club”

The moment he shows up with that gorgeous hair you’re suspicious

Texts you a selfie of his new hair with the creepy ass background

“Whatcha think? Even more handsome than normal? ;)” “go back to being bald i miss slapping ur bald head :(“

Anyway when he starts “sleepwalking” your immediate reaction is “Maybe it's the wig” but quickly forget all about it due to relaxation

“Um… yyyy/nnnn could you please help me out with one teeny tiny situation…? Please?”

Now you and Leo are on the case!

“Ooo lala finally some privacy ;)”

“Don't touch me until you’re bald AND we figure this out”

“Pwetty pwease? JUST ONE!”

“Fine, ONE kiss”

After the evil hair reveal and fighting with your boyfriend’s hair he's finally bald again

Leo explains the massage guy’s deal but it falls on deaf ears

“Hey, who’s that guy?” “He'sthe non-member we kicked out earlier!”

“I bet he and that human are the thieves. Call the cops”

After a quick stay in jail, you’re now peacefully back home

[lotus-sunn]

TEENAGE MUTANT NINJA TURTLES MUTANT MAYHEM COME LOOK

(note does this count as spoliers to the movie??? maybe but just in case SPOILERS!!!)

(didnt you hear me SPOILERS GUYS!!!)

your still here? good then you know!

OH MY GOD EVERYONE LOOK AT ME I JUST WATCHED MUTANT MAYHEM YK THE MOVIE AND WOW I LIKED IT I WOULD HAVE TO SAY...MIKEY OR DONNIE IS MY FAVORITE AND AHHH I LOVED THE ART I WAS SCREAMING WHEN MIKEY SAID COWABUNGA

Anyway, on further notice, the April x Leo...we will see how I feel about it. I felt a little stingy after seeing 2012 Donnie and April; it practically was the same scene. but nevertheless, I will be willing to give this a shot! My guy leo deserves love and he is a teenager! So of course he would fall for someone. Of course.

But CMON LOOK ITS PRACTICALLY THE SAME SCENE

TELL ME YOU SEE IT IM NOT CRAZY I PROMISE IM NOT

i cannot STRESS IT ENOUGH THEY ALMOST SAY THE SAME THING but that will be another post where i show the similarites in the scenes. Now Im not here to say things that are mean to enjoyers of apriltello! You guys like your things, and I like mine! 

Anyways, all in all, I really like it, and I also like the concept of a new-found family. It looks like Splinter actually gets to have a love life that will seemingly (from the looks of it) last.

unlike well these two

Also how, when the post credits play, we see the SHREDDER and that HE will be involved in maybe a new movie! But most likely, the cartoon SHOWS THAT THEY ANNOUNCED. CAN YOU BELIEVE THAT? AHHH, I AM SO FUCKING EXCITED!

Ahem. Moving on, at first I was kind of shocked at how squeaky (no offense) Donnies voice was, but it kinda grew on me after the end of the movie. i mean cmon, JUST LOOK AT HIM.

Of course his voice grew on me. Anyways I really liked the art style. First of all, it was so creative, especially how colorful it was! I mean, did you see Superfly at the arcade when he was with turtles? LOOK AT THAT EXPLOSION OF COLORS 

Also the SONGS???? ABSOLUTELY ALL FUCKING BANGERS I KNEW ALL OF THEM (the ones with lyrics yk) I NEED MORE CONTENT OMFGGG AHHH AND ALSO they ACT like teenagers (no hate to Rise they did it great as well or any other version of tmnt its just it kinda felt a little more for adluts at times or mature but thats just me dont attack me ) BUT LIKE THEY EMBRACED WHAT GEN Z IS AND ALSO THEY ACT LIKE JUST SOME FUCKING GUYS IN NEW YORK (I only confirmed that information with my cousin who lives in New York I'm taking her word for but of course take everything i say with a grain of salt.)

Personally, I'm still down with my girl APRIL ONEIL! I liked their April! I personally still LOVE Rise April more then mutant mayhems but thats juust me being biased of course! But I love how they continued with the "April is like their sister" thing and am glad they made Splinter more of a father-like rise which I EAT UP they did great!

Also while I watched the beginning I noticed how early they brought Baxter stockman up. I was confused at first but later understood but that my dear readers begs the question

Is he still alive?

Well, the movie kind of makes it look like he IS dead, but in the scene where they had him, they just took him in with them, so does that mean he is still alive? Will he come back to his mutant family?? How will he react to Superfly, his first kid, being presumably dead?

questions and more questions or should I say curiouser and curiouser? (I'm sorry.) 

Also, did any of you notice while they played the credits that THEY DREW MASTER SPLINTER FROM THE ROTTMNT?? I can't get the image now, but as soon as I do, I WILL SHOW YOU GUYS 

I also love the references to the old turtles in the credits and, I think, some of the movie scenes. 

loved that ( a nice call back)

And they also gave back Raph's sai's! Maybe they didn't want to upset the ahem uptight fans that are afraid of change, to completely tear down their movie (yes, I'm targeting you). (I saw what you did to rise. It was just a new weapon IT WASNT THAT FUCKING SERIOUS) But of course, if that was just their preference and choice, then that's cool too! 

Anyway, that's enough from me. This post is going to get way too long if I keep going, i might overload your brains haha!

so I will save you all the trouble and shorten this up and conclude my rant/friendly check in with all of you

Final thoughts:

All in all, it was a fantastic film that I enjoyed watching. It was SO worth the year I had to wait for. (Don't ask me to elaborate, please.) Should you watch it if you want to get introduced to TMNT? YES! Should you watch it if you are already a fan of TMNT, who is a nice person who isn't afraid of change??? Yes, you should!

I promise, you will love it! or at least, like it somewhat, no pressure! 

Good day and good night my fellow readers who took the time out of their day to read someones thoughts.

[haywire-cebus]

Anyways here are my rottmnt pokemon team headcanons bc i love making these so much

Leo: Torterra, Riolu, Ninjask, Zangoose, Gibble, Kedabra

Donnie: Blastoise, Rotom, Porygon, Beldum, Golek, Cacturne

Raph: Drednaw, Clefairy, Machoke, Snorlax, Makuhita, Ludicolo

Mikey: Torkal, Smeargle, Bellossom, Baltoy, Cranidos

April: Crustle, Zorua, Solosis, Fletchinder, Skitty, Noivern

Casey: Tirtouga, Mimikyu, Porygon-Z, Trubbish, Amaura, Applin

My reasonings on why for each are below the cut :):

Leo:

Torterr:- big and strong but so cute and full of love and life. He kinda just. Holds the fam together. his first pokemon (all the turtle pokemon are the brothers starters)

Riolu: Blue pokemon and physical fighting with some Magic, and i just love riolu and i feel like it compliments Leader Leo very well (he evolved when leo steps up and accepts his role as leader. leader of what? idk i havent thought that far into this au)

Ninjask: greatest ninja ever needs a ninja pokemon :)

Zangoose: his eye. His eye marking. Is like leo’s. Im a simple man i see red eye mark i go ‘oh thats leo’ 

Gible: blue and chompy. I like the idea of leo being Tormented by this lil chompy guy and then he evolves into this real powerful pokemon. And then he still torments him for him

Kedabra: teleports. leo teleports.

Donnie:

Blasoise: gun turtle. Idk what else to say (i was gonna give him torterra bc ‘but my real passion is biology’ but. Gun turtle.) I think he helps leo take care of his torterra tho

Rotom: this feels a lil self-explanatory lol. but with his rotom, he builds more than the “standard’ rotom body options for him, including one of those toy punching robots (fighting), a jetpack form (flying, but cooler than the fan form), a robot dragon (dragon), a fertilizer spreader thing (poison), and of course his favorite: Gun (steel)

Porygon: again, self explanatory i think. It evolves in a really Climatic Moment too and like Saves The Day (but more of a one-off episode Climatic Moment)

Beldum: another lil robot guy. donnie thought it was cool, and then he learned its evolution is super strong and went “heh knew it all along” but he is clearly lying to look cool

Golek: a lil robot (kinda) guy

Cacturne: he likes botany. And also hes smart enough to kno he needs some type differences in his team (the cacturne was a gift from his bros when they saw how much he liked their grass types)

Raph:

Drednaw: i mean LOOK at that guy. He’d have a shiny version bc the shiny version is a greener shade AND has red on it. Big spiky. 

Clefairy: cuddly boy for a cuddly boy

Machoke: he saw one pokemon fight as a kid and fell in love. And then he saw the contests and started entering those, and people think he aims for the “cool” ones but he keeps winning the “cute” ones with his machoke

Snorlax: raph uses him all the time to make his brothers (mostly donnie and leo) sleep, bc he has snorlax (SAFELY) lay on them and fall asleep

Makuhita: cute lil punchy boy :) also reminds me of the paper friend

Ludicolo: i mean come on look at the lil guy of course hes raphs pokemon

Mikey:

Torkoal: fiery turtle. Hot and fun. I think he likes to leap into the air using his back steam (i imagine him yelling “FULL STEAM AHEAD” and then torkoal moves so slow)

Smeargle: self explanatory. Little bouncy art guy. this is his main pokemon, always hanging around him outside the pokeball.

Bellossom: this one just looks like mikey to me. i think him getting it was like a “he saw it abandoned and wanted to return it to its trainer, but it lost a contest so the trainer abandoned it. it now doesnt wanna do contests, but wants BLOOD” type thing. (ok it doesnt want blood but it likes fighting more)

Baltoy: mikey saw this lil clay guy and they bonded immediately. Also some psychic bc mystic magic feels psychic to me. his smeargly likes to paint on it like ceramics

Cranidos: looks like the robot dino from the cut episode, so of course i picked it

Chingling: im not 100% sold on this as one of his pokemon, but its bright and cute and psychic, so i picked it. im open to other ideas tho

April:

Crustle: when they were little and first met april, they wanted her to be apart of their Turtle Squad, so donnie played distraction while they went to catch her one. They saw crustle and went “legs and shell? Fuck yeah turtle pokemon.” when they brought it donnie immediately was like “thats a crab.” but april was so touched she refused to let them try again and she cherishes it so much

Zoura: its mayhem. little chaos fox/animal. always on her shoulders/in her arms/pranking the bros

Solosis: she thinks its cute (raph agrees) but she has to keep it in its ball when shes around donnie bc the texture makes him very upset

Fletchinder: she gives me bird vibes idk and shes passionate (firey). 

Skitty: april deserves a cute lil kitty i think. it pretends to be nice but is also means to the boys behind aprils back (aprils pretends not to notice and plays innoncent when the bros confront her but when they leave she gives the skitty a poffin)

Noivern: one donnie actually caught for her (as a noibat) bc it was purple (and he obvs likes purple) and it flies so she could travel far easily and safely. april and donnie are besties and they are the only two the noivern let ride on its back, everyone else it will only carry them in its claws

Casey:

Tirtouga: future donnie made/revived him, and gave him to casey. Casey is a Part of their Turtle Family. Also hes from 100 million years ago, casey is from future. Theyre both lost in time. Idk its cute

Mimiku: it gives me future vibes. It now uses the pikachu disguise to be more intimidating than its form beneath the disguise (due to the electricity). I think also the future has a poison variation that makes it dangerous to touch if it doesnt trust you

Porygon-Z: i really dont wanna say why he has the evolved form of donnies pokemon. But i think yall kno. yes its sad. and yes its weird when they go back in time and see each other. but i think the circumstances that made it evolve to porygon-z are Apocolypse-Only so donnies wont go past porygon2 and make it Extra Weird

Trubbish: a trash pokemon from his apocalyptic future. theyre everywhere. casey loves him and is very defensive of him when he first gets to the past/present, bc new york looks so clean in comparison to the future (when he finally sees all the trubbish there bc its a city hes happy bc his trubbish isnt an outlier)

Amaura: future leo gave him the egg, and he was carrying it around for a while. It only hatched in the past (bc it felt safe enough to do it). yes casey cried. yes he named it after leo (subtly) (it isnt that subtle. probably nicknamed it like Ardo or something).

Applin: the first pokemon he caught in the past/present. He was so surprised to see such a vibrant grass type and he got so excited (grass type are very very rare in the future)

Mikey did the classic Pokemon Magic (thats esp common in the movies) and summoned dialga to send casey back in time. Leo helped by summoning palkia to send him to the right Space. Giratina is there for idk the kraang prison dimension. I havent formulated a lot of it this is just for funsies.

[mew-cake]

Rise of the Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles is literally one of the best interpretations of the characters I have ever seen. It does something new with these established characters that is just a breath of fresh air.

Raph was always “the angry one”. But now he’s the tank. The big guy with a heart of gold. And more interestingly, he acts like a leader. I remember is past turtle stories there would be friction between Raph and Leo about who the leader is which always felt kinda forced because the only reason Raph acted like that was because he was the designated lancer. But taking that character and making him the hard-shelled, soft-hearted older brother who looks after his siblings?? Oh my god, it’s so good.

Donatello has always been The Smart One(tm) and while that stays the same, they play it up more. He isn’t just the tech guy when plot demands it. Right down to his fighting style he is The Tech Guy who knows what to do. I’ve also seen some stuff about how he’s good representation of low empathy, especially when it comes to people on the autistic spectrum and yeah, I def see it. He does lack empathy a lot of the time, but that doesn’t make him any less compassionate.

Mikey I’m kinda sad cuz it feels like he hasn’t gotten a lot of time to shine. As of now I just finished episode 17 out of 26 and it’s honestly sort of a let-down. Mainly because I love Mikey?? I remember early on there was a comment about him being an artist and my brain was like “!!!” because hey! I’m an art kid who loves the color orange! Like, let me see some of his art!! Even with my own personal gripes, I adore the changes made to Mikey’s character. Before he was just the designated goofy character, but now he feels more like a whole person rather than a gimmick.

Leonardo has Protagonist Syndrome and it is a tad annoying. BUT! I’m not asking for perfect and nuanced character writing here. He’s a fun dude. Analysis brain turned off. He’s pretty cool. ALSO I really like he’s a red eared slider because we have those turtles were I live and I love them.

Splinter was kinda hard to get behind at first since, ya know, he’s normally the wise old master. Now he’s just sort of a old grandpa. But!! I appreciate the change in direction, and I really like how they’re going about the whole story. Like, he’s a kung-fu movie actor. Who also is apparently actually good at fighting. At least enough to get noticed by Draxum and mutated. So that creates this really cool dynamic of someone who lived the high life of stardom and is now just sorta chilling out.

ALSO also at first I was a tad irritated because they kept failing a bunch of mission stuff and I’m like “wtf aren’t they cool trained ninjas??” but THEN I realized that by “trained ninjas” it just meant they watched their dad’s old action movies. They learned how to fight by watching movies and the practicing those moves in real life. Which explains a lot actually. And it’s also a really brilliant way to tie in every aspect of the turtles and their origin story. They are, in fact, cool ninja turtles dudes. But they’re also stupid teenagers who are in way over their heads.

This show is really good and I’m having a fun time.

[bluezeri]

anyway I think mikey opening the portal to save Leo should've been way more dramatic,

[alienpeppers]

i lov her a lot

[angy-mouse]

Rating Your Shameful Simps

DISCLAIMER: this is of course all /lh and my attempts to be funny. I have too many skeletons in my search history to really judge but that won't stop me from initiating some clown on clown violence with yall.

Let's get into it

Asra from the Arcana game

...really? That's the most shameful character you'd read smut for? A man with a pet snake? Haven't played the game yet but he's pretty cute I'm a big fan of the white hair on poc character design I think it's cool 8/10

ok not necessarily shameful but matt murdock 😳😳

Again, really? ik damn well y'all are freakier than that bc you're here aintcha. 10/10 tho I approve

peepaw afton

All that comes up in google images is Springtrap. You don't wanna admit you're a robot fucker, huh? 0/10

william afton😞

All that comes up in google images is that 8-bit grape fucker and a scrawny brunet in a Springtrap onesie... is this young peepaw? He's not hideous, I'd say a 4/10, 7/10 if I were straight

freddy fazbear (all of them) 🏃‍♂️

Fair enough, not my type but I can't judge much. I tried to get into Foxy in middle school and now I'm super into Monty and Sun/Moon so yk. 7/10 if youre into dilfy types

Todd from Eddsworld

Google says you mean Tord, who I'm told is a robot-building communist. I can't say shit bc I read some Tom fics back when i was super into Eyeless Jack, never learned anything about Eddsworld tho. 4/10 bc i dont really like the art style, probably 6/10 if he was real

Jeff the killer

You mean the middle schooler with no eyelids? Get some help and focus on your geometry homework, creepypasta simping is for middle schoolers questioning either their gender or sexuality and haven't gotten a diagnosis for their mental issues yet and I stand by that bc I'm a shining example, 1/10

epistemological anarchism itself

I googled it and still don't know, fair enough, 7/10

the dad from httyd or that one bald butler from cruella

Stoik is fair, if you're into dilfs thats very understandable and vikings are hot, 7/10, I googled 'cruella bald butler' and mans looks like a clean shaven babish who moonlights as Agent 47 4/10

Ron Weasley

Everyone knows the twins are the hottest Weasleys 2/10

Venom

ah, the vanilla's shame. 10/10 character, I'll be here when you

optimus prime and i’m not proud of it

you shouldn't be, everyone knows if you're gonna fuck a transformer you go for Soundwave or Knockout and if you fuck an autobot you go for Bumblebee. Shameful. 2/10

Uhhh, probably Soundwave from transforms (specifically from transformers prime)

correct. 10/10 (side note i loved transformers prime it was one of the first shows i watched when i got out of my 'im only allowed to like girly things' phase and theres so many hot robots but also i lowkey had a crush on both jack and miko if im remembering names right)

I've read smut for the ninja turtles, SPECIFICALLY the 2007 movie ones, and the 2014/2016 movie ones

Incredibly valid, I was like 13-15 when the 2012 cartoon came out and in love with Raphael, then the 2014 movie came out and they were 9ft+ and so strong and they all had their little personalized accessories like mikey had a seashell necklace and they were all in like kilts/loincloths and I decided I'd be okay with any or all of them we're gonna assume (read: pray) that theyre 18-19 100/10

Bahorel, from Les Miserables (not the musical. the book. he's not mentioned in the musical. i read 2000 pages of french puns and descriptions of the paris sewer system just to read smut about an arguably minor character. ask me about the battle of waterloo i dare you. please kill me. )

Dear God. 2/10 for the character, 10/10 for the dedication.

ya ever heard of A Monster In Paris? Singing dancing giant flea named Francoeur. yeeeeea

I cannot judge, I never watched the movie but I watched that clip where she's singing while he plays his little instrument 100 times when i was like 15-16. I'm gonna judge anyway 8/10 there are hotter monsters but he is a musician so

Finally, the big whammy

munkustrap from cats (be gentle on me)

Wow. Wow. Everyone take a second, open a new tap, google it. First of all: absolutely not. There is not enough personality in the world to get my to fuck this creature. Secondly: you can't even come back with 'oh i meant this character typo aha' because there is nothing you can replace 'munkustrap' with to make this okay, because it'll still be from cats. Shame on you, shame on your cow, shame on your whole family. -9000/10

[tmnt-mags]

Raphael x Fem!Reader

Reader is April's little sister and meets the turtles through her. I changed the ages and timeline a bit just because I don't feel entirely comfortable writing the turtles as 15 year old kids. SO the turtles are 18 the reader is 17 nearing 18 and april is 27.

Warnings: some mention of parent death, but nothing else!

Part 1/ ??

Im still pretty new at writing fanfic and have only done a few and this is my very first tmnt one. Constructive criticism and nice things only please!

I didn't remember my dad. My mother gave birth to me a month before his death. I didn’t remember him but my big sister April did. She told me everything she could about him, all kinds of stories and old home videos. It's almost like I know him but I don’t. Sometimes it's sad and I wish for nothing more than to have some memories with him, but I’ve had a good life and have a great family. I’ve lived with my sister since our mom passed 2 years ago from cancer. I miss her a lot, but I like living with April and I love our apartment.

We both have a deep love for media. She is a reporter with Channel 6 and I started making youtube videos right around the time mom died. It was like a video diary back then and has since turned into something completely different, though there are the occasional personal diary type videos.

I was wearing my favorite oversized sweater. It was a deep forest green and nearly reached my knees. It was worn and a bit tattered in some places, but it was the coziest thing ever.. I was barefoot in the kitchen listening to April talking about the latest Foot Clan activity and thinking about the questions she was planning for some guy who worked on the docks. She had convinced her camera guy Vern to take her over there before they shot her morning segment.

“You’re gonna be late!” I called into the living room while putting some breakfastt in a container for her to take on the road.

“Thank you shorty,” She rushed in and gave me a kiss on the cheek as she grabbed her breakfast and rushed out of the kitchen again to grab her bag “I’ll either be back for dinner or late!”

“That's really specific April,” I mutter as a lean in the kitchen doorway and watch her check her purse. “Do you have your touchup bag and your toothbrush?”

April let out a small gasp and rushed back to the bathroom. She came back out with a bag, gathered her things and blew a kiss as she ran out the door. I let out a laugh and went to eat my own food.

I spent the day editing a new video. I just hit 700k last week so I was making a special video to celebrate. It had some songs that I had covered laid over a video of me painting a portrait of my mother and father. It was taken a year before he had died and they had gone on a weekend getaway in the Appalachian mountains.

I didn't look up until April burst through the door. It was already dark out and I hadn’t even noticed.

“I just witnessed a Foot Clan attack!” she called as she walked through the apartment.

“What? Oh my god! Are you okay?” I practically jumped up and followed her as she began pacing around the living room. “April? Are you okay?”

“I’m fine! There I was at the docks trying to get some answers and then BAM! They were there!” She went on about the attack and then started about some kind of vigilante that fought them off.

“Vigilante? Are you serious?” She didn't answer, she just went into her room. I sat back down on the couch and tried to process what she had said. In the end I shook it off and went get some dinner ready.

Over the next few days April was hard to find. She seemed to be constantly on the move and didn't answer her phone. She came home talking about dad's old experiments and giant turtles, and over the next 2 days seemed to just be gone. The spire on the Sacks building fell and The Shredder, who was the leader of the Foot Clan, was arrested and Eric Sacks was revealed to have been working alongside him the whole time. It was a wild time for New York, and April was suddenly quiet about the vigilantes.

Time began to move on and April started talking about these 4 new friends she had that were brothers. They seemed like a fun nice group, and the stories she shared were great.

“So,” I started as we sat together on the couch, “when do I get to meet the brothers?”

April choked on her glass of white wine. “What? Meet them?”

“Yeah, You talk about them all the time! I would like to meet them. They’re all you’ve been talking about for like 3 weeks.” I said as I pushed her with my foot.

“Ummm,” April stopped to think and had a vague look of concern on her face, “I'm not sure actually. They’re pretty busy guys.”

I narrowed my eyes at her. “Uh-huh. If you don't want me to meet them just say so. I was just curious.” I turn my face away from her.

“No it's not that, It's just they’re kinda shy. They don’t really like meeting people.” April's face said that she was telling a lie.

“Okay.” I left it at that clearly something is bugging her about me meeting her friends.

April-

April went to spend some time with the boys, but couldn’t stop thinking about them meeting her little sister. How would she react? She thought to herself, ‘I fainted when I met them, and there are still times when it kinda freaks me out a bit. I don’t want my baby sister to get scared and I don’t want the boys to get hurt because of it.’ They had tried to act like April’s reaction didn’t hurt them, but she knew it did. ‘I just want everyone to be happy.’ She was sitting in the lair watching the boys fight and Mikey brought up their Christmas pop album again. She smiled, (y/n) loved music and often performed covers on YouTube. She was really good at it. She had even written her own songs but at this point refused to release or talk about them on her channel.

“April, is something troubling you?” The brunette turned, surprised to see Master Splinter.

“Oh it’s nothing really.” She paused, “Actually could we talk? I am having some trouble.” Splinter nodded and gestured for her to follow. Not answering the questioning looks of the brothers, they went into Hashi.

“The boys avoid this room as much as possible,” Splinter said with a chuckle, “they will not listen in in here.”

“Makes sense,” April laughed and sat down on a mat with Splinter while looking at the odd structures in the room, “I’m having some trouble with my sister.”

“Oh yes, little (y/n) she had only just been born. I believe your father brought her down to the lab twice in those last weeks.” He thought back fondly on the small soft baby that looked so tiny in the arms of her father but so big compared to him then. “ what is it that is wrong?”

“She wants to meet the brothers. She doesn’t know that they are turtles, but she knows I have new friends.” April said looking down, “ we are very open. We’re the only family we have left so we always know each other's friends. It’s a safety thing I guess.”

Master Splinter hummed and looked at April, who continued.

“She wants to meet them and honestly I want her to too! I think they would all get along so well and I think the boys would adore her. It would also be nice to know that there are 4 ninjas who would look out for her.” April sighed and looked up at the ceiling.

“I just don’t want the boys to get hurt. What if she is afraid of them? What if she screams and calls them monsters or freaks? What if she passes out or cries. It would hurt them so much, and I don’t want to see my sister frightened anyway.” April’s shoulders slumped and she lowered her face to look across at Splinter.

“You know your sister well? Do you think she will react this way?�� The rat questioned.

“I don’t know. This isn’t exactly a situation that has ever come up before or one I ever thought I would be in.” She played with her fingers in her lap and she watched him stroke his beard.

“I think you know your sister well and know what would be the best course of action.” He smiled, “I think the trouble now will be convincing the boys to risk meeting her. I have no doubt that it will be a split crowd.”

April nodded and gave a kind of exasperated smile. She knew exactly what he was talking about. Mikey and Ralph would agree, Donnie was iffy, but Leo would say no.

“Thank you Splinter. That does actually help. Do you mind if I stay in here a bit longer?” She asked.

“Go ahead child. Take your time.” Splinter got up and left the Hashi.

April sat and thought about what he had said. She thought back to everything she knew about her sister and what she knew of the boys. If her sister could be accepting she knew that they could have a great friendship. The boys were half a year older than her and they didn't know anyone their age. It would be nice for them to have that she thought. She knew Mikey would be super friendly right away, maybe even too friendly. Donnie would be polite but wary at first and a bit excited. Raph would be happy just to meet another person, but Leo would be cold. She feared that he would be distant and unapproachable and she knew her sister well enough to know she wouldn't be able to handle that.

She took her time and eventually rejoined the brothers. She brushed off their questions with a simple: “I needed advice.” She sat down with them as they all talked and joked around. Finally Donnie brought up the perfect opportunity.

“April you're lucky you don't have brothers.” He said as Mikey bombarded him with insane ideas for gadgets.

“Well I don't have any brothers but I do have a baby sister.” The turtles all turned towards her clearly shocked by this news. “She's actually about 4 months from turning 18.”

“Woah Angelcakes, We didn't know you had a lil’ sis. Is she as beautiful as you?” Mikey said while batting his eyes at her.

“I think she is absolutely gorgeous, and she sings and does art. She’s about to be a senior in high school.” April said while leaning closer to mikey. “Shes shorter than me and has curves for days. She used to be on the dance team actually.” April laughed and Mikey threw himself back and fanned himself with his hand.

“Why haven't you mentioned her?” Leo asked.

“You never asked if I had any siblings. She was born a few weeks before my dad died.” April smiled sadly at that “She actually asked if she could meet you.”

The boys seemed to freeze at that, and suddenly all eyes were on her.

“You told about us?”. Raph asked.

“Kinda. I might have left out the part about being ninja turtles, but I told her about my new friends and she wants to meet you guys.” Raph scoffed at her answer.

“So you didn't actually tell her about us.” He almost snapped at her.

“Cool it Raph.” leo warned.

“I don't wanna be looked at like a freak. She won't want to meet us when she sees us.” he stood up and walked off. April looked at the others who all looked like they wanted to disagree and agree with Raph at the same time.

“Sorry angelcakes, I'm sure baby angelcakes is great though.” Mikey shrugged.

April sat in disbelief that they all basically said no. The lair was quiet after that and she left after they ate some dinner.

She got home only to remember her sister was spending the night at her friends house. So she had the place all to herself. She let out a sigh and poured herself a tall glass of wine and sat on the couch thinking about the events of the day. She came up with a plan as she finished her cup and decided that by the end of the week they boys will have met her baby sister. She grabbed her phone and invited the boys to come hang out at her place for once this upcoming weekend. They didn't even ask if her sister would be there.

(Y/N)-

April had gone out to pick up some pizza for a late night dinner. I had school, homework, and some video editing to do and forgot to cook. April came home late and said not to worry about it and would grab some pizza. Her new favorite place didn’t offer delivery so she went to go get it. I decided that a nice hot shower sounded good and went in. I got out as I heard the front door open and close. I made my way to my room about to throw on my favorite green sweater only to remember that It had been washed and was in the dryer. So, I wrapped my towel back around me and opened my door to head out into the living room. I walked out and looked up only to meet with 4 pairs of eyes.

“Oh my bad,” I said, turning to go back to my room only to stop and turn right back around. “Ummmm…” I trailed off not sure what to say as I stared at 4 very large, very green, oddly human like turtles, all while in a bath towel that left most of my left hip exposed.

“Oh hi (y/n). I forgot to mention I had friends coming over.” April said walking into the room. “You might wanna put some clothes on though.”

“Yeah…” I said not able to look away from the very large turtle creatures sitting in the living room.

[sharkwing]

why do you like tmnt so much! im rlly interested cause you post so much about it and the style looks really pretty, but i wanted to hear about it some more!

Ooh you’ve opened the floodgates now!!! The answer for tmnt in general is that I LOVE modern day action adventure stuff, and most incarnations of tmnt scratch that itch in a way that balances lighthearted fun and meaty plot stuff really well. But Rise of the TMNT is my favorite, no contest, so I’m gonna talk specifically about that.

For context, the first version of TMNT I watched was the 2012 cgi cartoon. I like that version, it’s super nostalgic for me. But if TMNT 2012 is say, MCU Spiderman, Rise of the TMNT is it’s Into the Spiderverse. If you’re already a fan, it plays with the lore in really fun ways, and isn’t afraid to play with new spins on established characters (ex: one of the most popular side characters, who’s usually one of April’s love interests, is female in Rise!). If you’re NOT already a fan, it has gorgeous animation, endearing characters, fantastic writing, and a really cool aesthetic.

There’s also a shift from mostly straight Sci-Fi to Science Fantasy with the heavy involvement of creatures called Yokai. Yokai have been present before, but this time they’re front and center from the start—in Rise, a Yokai named Baron Draxum wants to wipe out humanity, who he believes to be a threat to his kind, by using alchemy to mutate humans into Yokai themselves. (Three guesses as to how the turtles came to be in this version.) The humans that get mutated are also handled really well. Most of them are villains, but unlike TMNT 2012, Rise...actually gives a shit about them? They appear often, are developed fairly well, and there’s some really nice subtle and environmental storytelling about how they’re all dealing with their mutation in different ways. Some of their lives are ruined, some of them straight up don’t care and go about business as usual, and for others it’s a mixed bag. New York is a weird place, and most of the regular human characters are just as weird and interesting as all the mutants and ninjas and stuff. It’s fun and dynamic, and honestly? Some of them look way better as mutants anyway (lookin at you, Hypnopotamus).

What really pulls me in is the characters. I love the boys in pretty much any incarnation, but like I said, Rise isn’t afraid to try new things with established characters. Leonardo (the blue one) is normally the oldest and the leader, and that’s...pretty much it for most versions of Leo. Rise shifted leadership and the oldest bro position to Raphael (the red one, hotheaded fighter). Not only do we get to see a new side of Raph, I’m not exaggerating when I say that now that Leo has room to breathe, this is the most personality he’s EVER had. Pretty much all the boys are extremely well developed and each have individual relationships with *each other* beyond being a team of heroes, something that’s missing from a lot of other incarnations.

Imo, the best change is the one that probably put the most old fans off of the show initially: Splinter, the turtles wise but distant father and sensei, is now...kind of a dirtbag, initially? In his first few appearances, he doesn’t do much aside from laze around in front of the TV. He doesn’t even seem to remember his son’s names. But the emphasis of this show is Character Development with a capital C-D, and by the end of its (unfortunately abbreviated) run he’s kind of the coolest version of Splinter there is, not to mention the best dad.

Unfortunately Rise of the TMNT was recently “paused” by Nickelodeon, and the crew was given six weeks to write a four episode finale to conclude the current storyline. For all intents and purposes, it’s been cancelled and is unlikely to return. This was apparently due to “a change in leadership with different priorities” rather than any fault on the show’s part, which is very frustrating. But! There’s a Rise of the TMNT movie in the works at Netflix, and some fans are hoping that they’ll pick it up for a series continuation. Idk how likely this is, but Netflix already streams Rise in Canada, and stranger things have happened. And even if Rise doesn’t return, I highly recommend giving it or even the 2012 version a watch! If you liked teen titans you’ll probably like 2012. Tmnt has a lil something for everyone, and I hope ya check it out!

[lovemesomesurveys]

Do you like bacon? Nope. 

Have you ever wished for something to come true and it did? When I was a kid, sure. Like, “I wish my mom would get me McDonald’s for lunch today” and she did. ha.

Do you like Rammstein? I’ve heard of them, but I’m not familiar with their music. It’s a German band, right?

Do you know a friend of a friend? I don’t have any friends now, but yeah I’ve known friends of friends.

Do you smile for no reason? It sounds creepy worded like that.

if somebody paid you a million dollars to get a green mohawk would you? Gahhh. A million bucks, huh... 

Ever had a BLT? Did you like it? Nope. I don’t like bacon, for one. We’ve established that. Second, I don’t like lettuce or tomato on my sandwiches or burgers, sooo. That doesn’t leave much else.

Are you in College? No, I graduated back in 2015. I’m glad I managed to finish before shit hit the fan with me.

Have you ever been to a State Fair? No.

Do you like Youtube? I do.

If so whats your favorite channel? I have several favorite ASMRists and vloggers I follow.

Do you enjoy compulsively cleaning electronics? I do kind of enjoy cleaning underneath the keys on my laptop.

What is your favorite small dog breed? Teacup Maltese dogs are adorable. They’re way too tiny, though. I prefer medium size doggos. I think it’s because I’m in a wheelchair and they’re the perfect height for me.

Do you smell bacon cooking? No. Clearly, you like bacon.

Have you ever bitten anything for any unknown reason? What was it? I don’t go biting random things. I’m not even someone who bites things to open them. 

Do you like the movie "The Master Of Disguise"? I’ve never seen it, I just have a vague memory of some bald guy in a green suit I think saying, “turtle, turtle.” lol.

What is the closest thing to you thats red? My hair. Well, part of it. :X I’m so overdue.

Have you ever gone into a toystore just to play with the toys? When I was a kid. That reminds me, my dad worked at the mall when I was a kid and sometimes he’d take me to work with him and let me pick out some toys at the toy store to play with in the break room. It was fun. 

When was the last time you went through a Mcdonalds Playplace? When I was a little kid. So disgusting imagining that knowing stuff as an adult now. Ew.

Do you have an annoying dog? No. I probably annoy her, haha.

What was the first comic book you ever had an obsession over? I was never into comic books.

Do you like kids pop-up books? Aw, I loved those as a kid. 

Does anybody else think bugs are cool and interesting? Most certainly NOT me.

What kind of toothpaste do you use? Sensodyne. 

Do you own a pair of striped socks? Yeah.

What is the most random thing in your bedroom? I’ll go with the 4ft giraffe in the corner that’s wearing a Santa hat. haha.

In a normal conversation do you slip out Latin? Uh, no? 

Can you sing? Nope.

If so, what is the highest note you can reach?

Have you ever been to the cream cheese capital of the world? No.

Was this survey random? Sure.

Have you ever been in a parade? Nope.

What is your mothers, mothers maiden name? I am not sharing that.

Do you have a different hairstyle? My hairstyle is very common and boring. There isn’t even a style to it, honestly. 

Am I annoying yet? At times. I don’t feel well, though, so I’m just not in the mood.

Do you like soybeans? I haven’t had actual soybeans. Do you press buttons just to see what they do? No. You could blow up the world or something.

Do you still play pokemon? No. I very briefly got into the Pokemon Go thing back when that was all the rage, but it was very short lived. It’s not much fun for homebodies, ha.

What is your favorite pokemon? Jigglypuff! <<< I always say that, too.

Have you ever put blue streaks in your white cats hair? I’ve never had a cat, but I wouldn’t do that if I did.

Are you blond? Nope.

Does it bother you when people have a collar turned up? I don’t care.

Are your nails painted? If so, what color? If not, do you like nail polish? Nope. I haven’t painted my nails in years. Not that there’s ever much nail to paint anyway.

Are you awesome? Nope.

As a kid did you like Barney, Baby Bop, or DJ more? Baby Bop.

Have you been to the Bzoink Forums yet? No, I never go on Bzoink.

Does any key on your computer and or laptop stick? Nope.

Does fire excite you? No, I’m a scardy cat.

Have you ever sung in a choir? Yeah, a few years in elementary school.

Do you go to church? I attend the live streams.

Have you ever had a theme(pirate, ninja, civil war) day Spirit Days or Weeks at work, sure. <<< Same, but at school.

Can you touch your tongue to your nose? Nope.

Have you ever been to Philadelphia PA? No.

Do you think Orlando Bloom is hot? I’m personally not attracted to him.

Do you think Twilight is over-rated? I was a big Twi-nerd back when the books and movies were coming out. I grew out of it, though.

When was the last time you where sick? what did you have? I have an infection currently that I’m on antibiotics for. 

What is your favorite number? 8 - I like the way that it’s shaped. <<< Saaaame.

Look at your toes. No.

If you are a girl do you hate girl drama? I like celebrity drama.

If you are a guy do you hate girls who prolong the drama?

ZZZ, im tired....are you? Always.

Favorite indie music group? I don’t have one favorite.

Have you ever pet a monkey? No.

Have you ever ridden a camel? No.

Have you ever punched somebody? Only very lightly like on the arm in a playful way.

Do you like cupcakes? I do. Orange or lemon flavoring? Lemon.

Can you sing opera? Nopeee.

Touchpads or Mouse's? Touchpad. I haven’t used a mouse since the early 2000s.

Have you ever been to a Disney theme park? I’ve been to Disneyland a few times. I love it.

[2k18leo]

TMNT 2007 talk

Okie dokie since we’ve been on hiatus for a long long time, but I still want to talk turtles, I figured I’d talk about the TMNT 2007 film again. If you’ve been with my account for a while you may know what a huge fan I am of this particular movie (of course I love the other films and may talk about them at a later date, but this one just hits differently for me mainly because it’s what got me into the Ninja Turtles in the first place) 

So, I have already briefly covered my take on the 2007 film as a whole.  Aaaand, @my-sai-and-i _and_i wrote a post that goes in depth about the emotional scarring that the fight had on Leo and Raph. It’s a wonderful post and you should def check it out 👌🏼

I am currently watching the 2007 film (yet again (HA what is my count up to now? Can’t keep track. Lol moving on—)) and once again I am breathless at the climactic fight BATTLE that Leo and Raph have. Every single time I watch it, my love for the franchise grows even more. I think this may be because I’m actually such a fan of the TMNT trope that is the constant butting heads of the two oldest brothers (oof sorry not sorry 🤭). I’m also going to talk mainly about this fight scene because it’s literally the EXACT scene that I started watching when I was first introduced to tmnt. That is already talked about in another post, however 😂

Okaaay, let’s get into this thing. First off, the score for this chase scene is already making you very anxious for some sort of confrontation between the two boys. It gives you chills right off the back. Whenever Nightwatcher accidentally cornered himself I got to thinking what it would have been like if we had seen Leo and his trip out into the city instead of the diner scene with the 12th monster. Like, was he just out looking for Raph and heard police scanners saying there was an issue with the diner? Then he headed over to possibly help, but ran into the vigilante Nightwatcher. I can only assume he was already looking for Raph since Splinter right beforehand advised Leo that he needed to get off his high horse and work things out with Raph. Since April and Casey were in the lair, I’m sure Leo didn’t expect Raph to go back to their apartment. He probably went around to their old hangout places in the city (before Leo was sent to South America) but since he had been gone so long, maybe he figured his brothers didn’t hang out anymore since it wasn’t all four of them. Sure, Casey’s a great friend, but never a replacement for one of the turtles. Leo could have also gone back to the construction site that they had partly demolished with that first monster a couple nights prior. Raph did make a point in saying that they needed to find out who was responsible for the sudden burst of creatures in New York. Don’t get me wrong, learning where the 12th monster was when Raph fought it was important I guess? I mean, it made the stone generals stationed in the area, but still not THAT close to where Raph and Leo ended up (they ran quite a ways. A mile at least.)

Okay, back to the rooftop scene. The setting was beautiful and I just— *chef’s kiss* love it. The rain. The red glow of the Red Eye Club sign. Which, I’m just now thinking about this but if an English teacher was asking you what the red sign symbolized I do believe that that could be some sort of symbol/foreshadow that Raph will be the one who comes out victorious in the upcoming brawl. In case I’m not completely giving that a whole-ass stretch, I looked up the Red Eye Club to see if it was a real place but all I got were a bunch of pictures of marijuana so I’m gonna assume NOPE. It could be a minor detail or it could just be a coincidence 🤷🏽‍♀️ I mean the neon sign did not have to be red specifically. Lol don’t @ me 😂

Anyway, I love the way the rain falls on the metal of Raph’s armor. I can only imagine how much of a BITCH that rain was to animate. 

Leo starting off with the good cop persona is very in touch with his character and I like. He’s still the “talk first, shoot later” wise character we LOVE, while Raph is so much the opposite (which we LOVE JUST AS MUCH (ugh sorry im gushing again)). I like how Raph stayed silent. He didn’t give his identity up. He didn’t try to stop Leo from starting a fight. He WANTED to fight Leo. And this was the perfect opportunity without Leo holding back by being aware of his own brother under the suit. It’s sort of like a Red Hood/Batman type scene. And, it’s hardly audible but, Leo then continues to try and calm down the vigilante by saying “The road you’re on is a dead-end. Believe me, I’ve tried it.” He has no idea who is behind the mask. For all he knows, he’s talking to a complete stranger, yet he is still trying to be the voice of reason. The Nightwatcher could be a deranged murderer for all he knows. He is only aware of what the News has been recently saying. You can tell he doesn’t know everything about this vigilante (which, side note but, this all seems a bit hypocritical if I’m honest. Up until Donnie and Mikey got jobs, all the turtles/Casey/possibly April did was vigilantism. I mean, does Leo think that the Nightwatcher is correlated with the monster sightings? Is that his main reason for being a vigilante to stop a vigilante??) ALSO when Leo said “…believe me, I’ve tried it” is that referencing his time in South America? I know he “got caught up in his own world” and “forgot about everyone else” but does that necessarily correlate with what he’s talking about? Did something really bad happen in South America that we didn’t see? Did he become like Hawkeye (cough* Ronin) in Endgame? 

This also makes me wonder what would have happened if Donnie and Mikey had gone out to help Leo search for Raph. It could have been like a Teen Titans scene where Robin was posing as Red X and the rest of the titans unknowingly fought their ally because he was seemingly just another villain. If things played out that way, I’m not even sure that Raph would have put up much of a fight. He didn’t have any major beef with his younger brothers. The scene would have probably been way less emotional as well. Plus, Leo probs wouldn’t have been captured. 

Whenever Raph first wields his weapons, signifying he’s ready to fight, Leo gives a very small smirk. He wants to fight as much as Raph does. But for different reasons. Raph knows his opponent and is angry with him— furious even. Leo… I think deep down he loves to fight. He knows he’s good at it. He knows he’s going to win. But it’s probably been a long time since he’s actually felt that great adrenaline rush of a fight (yes, I’m aware he was in the fight with the first monster but that’s not a one-on-one duel) Which is why when he says “Trust me when I tell you. You don’t want to do this” he says it in a way that he’s still trying to be the voice of reason… BUT it’s also very much a threat. He’s been wanting a proper fight for a while. There’s a certain thrill I’m sure he gets when he’s faced with someone who is probably an even match for him. Even with the threat he gives, he’s fully aware that his opponent will strike. 

COCKY LEO. 

I’m not going to even try to get into the subject as to why on earth Leo cannot recognize his own brother under the suit because @my-sai-and-i already explained that WAY better. 

I mean, Leo is chuckling as the Nightwatcher does his second swing. It’s funny to him because he still knows he’s going to win this fight. There is no doubt in his mind that he will defeat this amateur clown in a costume. But this is the way, I’m absolutely positive, Leo acted as a teenager to common criminals on the streets.  He’s always known how good he was at fighting, so I can bet money he was cocky growing up. And yeah, it’s way different than how he was fighting the raiders in the beginning of the film. Back in South America he acted all dark and silent, more than likely trying to keep up the persona of the Ghost of the Jungle. If he acted all cocky and obnoxious to the raiders, I’m sure word would get out, which might frighten the villagers even more. Being his sneaky stealthy self, he was less likely to scare the villagers, and probably able to keep up the thought that he was just a peaceful legend (kind of like Katara as the Painted Lady in Avatar (I’m referencing soooo many other things, but it makes sense to me 😂)) So, now that Leo’s back in the place where he grew up, of course, his old cocky tendencies would come back. It’s almost nostalgic for him. 

Another thing. Leo is completely defensive for the majority of this fight. He hardly ever throws an actual blow. He jumps back out of the way when the Nightwatcher swings his chain at him again. Which is a completely smart move. Another reason to note that he KNOWS WHAT HE’S DOING. He’s fought for about 20 years (we don’t actually know their ages in this movie (or do we ?) but I would guess around 18-20 ??) so he’s fully aware of the fact that one of the best fighting techniques is letting your opponent tire themselves out so you can then finish them off and become victorious. But Raph’s temper has always led him to go guns blazing. Shoot first, questions later. 

Leo continues to mock the Nightwatcher because he knows he’s going to get a rouse out of him. He spent a good enough time sparring with Raph to figure out how to egg on that temper. A temper that would then make Raph angry and thoughtless, thus becoming rash with his fighting technique. Ultimately becoming careless and in total defeat. Again, don’t get me started on how Leo has NOT recognized his brother yet. Even after Leo has eluded yet another strike from the chains and the Nightwatcher turns around, Leo still gives a CHUCKLE to his face. He’s begging for that temper to be released. He’s ready for a real fight. And Raph’s more than ready to finally kick his big brother’s ass. 

Raph absolutely takes on the offense with a full charge to Leo as he does three heavy swings. Leo eludes all three until coming back with a counter-attack on the third. Leo does a fair job of holding his defense until Raph throws a huge right hook to the side of Leo’s head. I mean, it’s enough to knock him back a few paces and shake it off. This is when his face really goes completely serious. He’s just been caught off guard. There’s something in him that’s telling him to quit the wise-guy act. I mean, it was a simple punch, something I’m sure he is mentally beating himself up for misreading. Yet, he doesn’t charge back. He stands his ground while Raph is still the offender. 

Then Leo tries to continue to coach this dude by telling him how anger is destructive. This is probably something Splinter did as they were growing up. Also, Leo never once unsheathes his weapons on the Nightwatcher (yes, he ultimately does with Raph, but that’s later on. Hold tight, my dude). Even when the Nightwatcher drew out his chains, Leo didn’t react by drawing his own blades. I feel like being able to hold your own during hand-to-hand shows power/strength, while fighting with weapons shows skill. Which is another reason why I think Leo teased him at the beginning of the fight; he didn’t really expect this vigilante to have had any actual training with these weapons. He’s probably just some punk who thinks it’s cool. Another Casey Jones or Purple Dragon that could probably be knocked on his ass in 3 hits max. 

Leo’s uppercut is powerful as hell. He shot Raph like 6 feet in the air. And that can’t be easy. I can’t imagine how much these boys weigh. They’ve got the mass of a typical bodybuilder + the weight of their shell + the weight of their weapons PLUS Raph’s entire armor. That’s heavy as hell. 

Okay. The “Goodnight, Dark Prince” line. I don’t like it. It doesn’t seem to fit. When has this character ever been referred to as the Dark Prince? The only other thing Leo has referred to this vigilante is Nightwatchmen. Though, I get that it would be kinda redundant to say “Goodnight, Nightwatcher.” 

That’s another thing. Leo never meant to kill this dude. Just knock him out to drop him off at the police station later. Leo doesn’t kill. I mean, the very beginning of the film where he had his one-on-one with the raider leader almost implied that he killed him. Because the shot changed as soon as Leo made contact with the guy and all you hear is a loud scream making a flock of birds fly away in fright. If he was dark enough to kill these types of men (because IF he killed him, that probably wasn’t the first guy he had killed) in South America, that’s most likely the “dark path” / “dead-end” that he was referring to earlier. But I guess being back in the city does make him revert back to his old tendencies (but it shouldn’t completely disregard whatever messed up shit he had done in South America. That stuff should still be carried with him). Not even Raph is low enough to kill criminals. In his first scene in the film all Raph does is knock out some burglars and chain them up for the cops to find later on. It makes me wonder what would it have been like if Raph had gone to South America instead of Leo, while Leo stayed in the city. Would Leo have taken on his role of his own Nightwatcher? In the 2012 series, we see him become some sort of vigilante but he’s got Karai and Shinigami with him. It doesn’t seem very in character for Leo to go solo like Raph did. Of course, Leo would still miss the fight, but I’m sure he’d wise up and get a job just like his younger brothers. 

Okay, here we go. Here’s that brother angst we’ve been waiting for. When Leo first realizes who’s actually behind the mask, he’s not angry. He’s not mad. Not even disappointed. He’s really just shocked out of his mind. Complete disbelief. He just walks closer to Raph in hopes to talk to him. Perhaps apologize for fighting him just moments before, that he truly had no idea. But Raph doesn’t even turn to face his brother before doing a powerful back kick to Leo’s chest. Which, of course, takes Leo by surprise. Sure they had had a couple arguments since he’s been back but honestly that’s how Leo remembered things being with Raph. He remembered small quarrels. Nothing serious. They had always butted heads. Even though Splinter warned Leo that Raph had taken Leo’s absence pretty hard, he didn’t really know what that meant until now. He didn’t understand why his brother had so much pent up rage toward him. 

And Raph is throwing all these words at Leo. Calling him out by saying that he believes the world revolves around him. That they couldn’t possibly survive without him. I’m sure these words sting a bit to Leo but that’s not what he’s focused on. He’s starting to register everything. THIS is why Raph has always had an issue with him. THIS is the reason for his younger brother’s constant attitude. And when Raph says that they got along just fine without Leo, for a split second, you can totally see the pain that causes Leo. Like, that shit hurted. But he raises his voice and retaliates by calling him out on his bullshit. He’s telling Raph how immature it is that he’s taken up this new persona (*cough* still a tad hypocritical since he did basically the same thing as Ghost of the Jungle) because it’s causing danger to their family. I mean, at least the villagers were never truly afraid of Ghost, but the citizens of New York are terrified at what the Nightwatcher is and his motives. It’s all they’re talking about on the News lately. Raph has been causing a panic without even realizing it because he’s been too blinded by his own good intentions. 

But Raph doesn’t want to hear it. Leo hasn’t been around. He left. He wasn’t there when the turtles were just sitting by without a leader while criminals still ran amok. I mean, Raph has been angry at the thought “why does Leo get to go?” “What are we supposed to do now?” And with Donnie and Mikey being too passive to stop Raph, there really isn’t anyone around to keep Raph from straying from this road. How can Leo honestly expect things to go back to normal?? How can this big shot waltz back into our lives after he’s missed the last year and a half? And how the hell does he think he’s still the boss of me? 

And now Leo is trying to explain to him that the reason for being gone so long was to better himself for Raph and the boys. It wasn’t up to him to go to South America and be gone for so long. He didn’t ask for it. Just like Raph never asked to be second best. He didn’t want someone to lead him. This is just how things turned out. Neither of them can help what they went through in the past. It’s just a recipe for disaster when one party is trying to be the best they can be for the other party and positively beats themselves up if they let the second party down. Aaand when the second party is completely resentful of the first party because they were chosen for the role the second party wanted. Leo can’t get over the fact that no matter what he does to better himself for Raph, Raph will still disregard it. And Raph can’t get over the thought of the living embodiment of perfection that is his older brother, so he’s angry with himself for not being as perfect and takes it out on Leo. 

And Raph has become his own leader. He’s become a lone-wolf that doesn’t need a leader anymore. He has good intentions (even though they are not being followed through quite right) and Leo is just coming back and messing everything up. Things have changed and Leo needs to realize this. But Raph also needs to take into consideration that Leo is trying to realize this. He’s been trying to reconnect with his brother. But Raph has put up such a strong wall around everyone that he thinks talking isn’t going to help.

Leo telling Raph that he isn’t ready to become his own leader is a tiny bit selfish in my opinion? I mean, I agree, but still. Like Leo sees that Raph never went on a hardcore training period off in some jungle halfway across the world. So, he thinks, how CAN Raph be ready if he hasn’t done that? But that’s the thing. Leo and Raph have their own way of doing things. Leo, in multiple iterations, tries so hard to have his brothers be exactly like him. If he achieves something a certain way, he expects his brothers to reach their achievements by doing it the exact same way. But Raph is fully capable of reaching his achievements his own way (same with Donnie and Mikey). That’s something that Leo has had a difficult time wrapping his head around. 

I also don’t feel like Leo outwardly staying that he’s better than Raph is true to his character. There’s no doubt in my mind that Leo believes that and has thought it on SEVERAL occasions. But with his “gotta be the bigger man” personality, it’s hard to believe he would stoop so low as to actually say it to Raph’s face. 

Now Raph laughs at this. And I feel like most of it is a fake laugh, but there’s still a part of it that’s real because he’s finally ready to show Leo that he’s better than him. This is the real fight that RAPH has been waiting for. The perfect match. The leader and the lone wolf. The Ghost of the Jungle and the Nightwatcher. Leo and Raph. 

Leo still tries to have him call off this fight. He’s confident in himself that he will win. Both parties are, in fact. They’ve both developed such different fighting styles since the time they’ve sparred together, that they’re basically strangers to each other now. They both know this isn’t going to end well. That things will be different after the dust (rain?) settles. Leo has a negative outlook on it. He doesn’t think that Raph will ever be happy towards him again. If anything, Raph will probably shun him. This defeat could push Raph over the edge. This could make Raph leave for real. He doesn’t want that. It pains him that he has to fight his little brother. But Raph? Raph has a positive outlook. He believes that after he defeats Leo, Leo will then see Raph’s true potential. He’ll be recognized as the best, no longer second-best. He finally gets to prove to Leo that things are different. 

Leo visibly sighs and shakes his head knowing there’s no getting out of this fight. His stubborn little brother won’t back down. It wouldn’t be honorable for Leo to stand down and admit defeat. It also wouldn’t be honorable to disgrace Raph by completely disregarding that he’s his brother and just going for the kill. He’s at a complete crossroads here. So, ultimately, he draws his swords. 

The shot of the two boys staring at each other from across the roof — I want that as a poster !! It’s so gorgeous. I’m just noticing this now but it’s split JUST down the middle in terms of color. It gives a very yin and yang type picture. Leo is on the side where the red neon sign is glowing bright, thus making him glow a faint red color. Raph, on the opposite end, is on the side where the shine of the moon is hitting down, making his armor almost glow a pale blue. Ugh so much symbolism I may cry.  Right off the bat you can tell the differences in the two boys. Raph has been in his ready-stance for a while. He’s been waiting for this. Leo stands tall with blades in hand but not in an attack stance. There’s still that sliver of hope that Raph will back down. It’s still early enough to put this behind them, but that window is fading fast. As the rain beats down around them, Leo realizes that the window is closed. Nothing will stop this fight. It’s happening. There is no going back. 

Per the theme this rainy evening, Raph is the first one to charge. He runs like the brute he has become, fists clenched around his sai so he’s ready to stab or punch. Leo charges in a very graceful samurai run. Also the music. The thundering drums that beat so deep and so fast. It’s such a powerful scene. 

The shot of the tip of Leo’s blade grazing the water on the roof is STUNNING. Honestly, who thinks of these details because I hope they got a RAISE back in 2007 😂 it’s beautiful 

I also love how they both jumped toward each other as their first move. This shows that they are now both on the offense. Something snapped inside Leo to make him change up his tactics a bit. Almost to throw off Raph, who has never been the best at a defensive position. His strong suit is in the offense. 

Still the differences between their fighting styles after the jump. Leo did a beautiful forward shoulder roll, which is a proper technique of coming out of a forward jump. It keeps your momentum going into your next attack. Raph landed on his feet which, may not be ideal, but gave him a split-second advantage to be on the offense for the next attack. Leo then had to block with his sword. This fight goes FAST. I’m watching it so carefully and I’m sure there are things that I’m missing. I love how Leo does a roll over Raph’s shell, and up until now I figured he had made contact with his shell, but he actually didn’t because just as Leo started his roll, Raph ducked forward out of the way. Then Raph does a couple kicks towards Leo’s head, which cause water to sprinkle EVERYWHERE and it’s gorgeous. Raph is just going ham and not letting up on Leo as he’s still going for those strikes. (Lol I took a stage combat course over the summer so I know a little bit of the lingo (but good god I am no expert so please call me out if you know I’m using improper terms)) Watching this scene makes me want to do a move chart with a list of moves they are doing and in the order they’re doing it haha. Finally, Leo is able to squeeze in two strikes towards Raph, both of which he ducks and then blocks. 

The camera angles are wonderful. Have I talked about that yet? I mean the shot of the two of them squaring off. The little shot of the two of them fighting between the E and the D in the neon sign. And even the upcoming shot from below when they’ve got their weapons locked together. So beautiful. 

This scene also really shows the details of the Nightwatcher suit. 

And when Leo is able to do an X cross block with his swords at the downward blow Raph is throwing with his sai, and the camera angles are just moving with the characters. UGH. Here you can see that Leo really is mad. The fury of the fight is showing through his eyes as he watches his brother with a predator-like stare. *frantically looks up synonyms for furious* and boy oh boy, Raph is just seething as he twirls his blades. This small segment of them circling each other (sort of like a Spaghetti western style) is a fighting trope that I really dig. Sais are actually a lot larger than I gave them credit for. Those sharp boys are HUGE. 

The way they have their teeth bared as they circle each other reminds me so much of two very dominate male animals fighting. Like two lions fighting for the pride. When Leo finally comes to a stop his eyebrows furrow just a tad bit more, almost impatiently waiting for Raph to make another offending move. Or possibly giving thought as if the fight was coming to its end. And Raph’s pupils are crazy dilated as he charges yet again. It’s like a sickness that has infested his mind, this constant need to one-up his older brother. It’s making him crazy. And the heaviness of that armor is making Raph charge like a rhino or something. And the shot of Leo tightening his grip on his blade gives the implication that there may have been a split second where he believed Raph was ready to be done with the fight. 

Their eye contact hardly ever breaks during this scene. Raph is wanting to see that split second of worry in his brother’s eyes. He’s wanting to see that hesitation. 

Now Leo charges and he has taken full offense. He strikes at Raph many times, closing him into the wall under one of the two signs. He throws seven blows before doing a jumping spin kick to Raph’s abdomen. You can tell that blow sent Raph back a ways, maybe even farther if that wall wasn’t there to stop him. He probably has some form of whiplash. And even as he’s starting to lock eyes with his opponent again, Leo’s sword comes RIGHT BY HIS NECK. Leo literally got so close to making a fatal would for Raph. And no, Leo had no intention of killing Raph. He was probably aiming to give Raph a nasty slash on his cheek. Just a warning. Something that would remind Raph to stay in his place. 

Now here it is. The locking of their weapons. The climax of the fight. Raph is enraged and is gritting his teeth so hard that he’s shaking. In the shot from below, you can see the absolute force that they are using to one-up the strength of the other as their muscles are just quivering. And Raph tries to make himself become larger to push Leo back. Leo gives a quick glance down to his weapon in fear that the thin blade will give out. Swords aren’t meant to withstand this kind of pressure. 

And when they do break. b o i. The shock and pain that sweeps through Leo is heartbreaking. He just lost. Even before Raph throws the final blow. Leo’s swords are finished, just as he is. His swords. The weapons he’s most likely had since he became leader all those years ago. A literal extension of his body. Taken away from him in an unforgivable instant. And right as Leo is taking a glance back up to Raph, Raph is already coming up to powerfully kick him straight through the jaw. Through his kick, Raph is still in his jump twirling around to deliver the fatal blow to his brother’s head. The spear of his sai is centimeters away from Leo’s head as he falls back and hits the concrete behind him. As soon as his eyes open after being knocked back, he registers how close that blade was to piercing his skull. He’s been around long enough to recognize a deadly shot. You can tell his mind is racing in that fraction of a second as he sees the blade and looks back up to Raph to question why on earth he would throw such a potentially devastating blow. And just like that, Raph standing above with Leo pinned to the ground, he has won. He has defeated Leo. Even still, you can see their expressions change numerous times as they process what has just happened. Raph still bares his teeth in anger/triumph. He’s finally showing Leo what he thinks of his “place”. Finally showing him that he is a worthy opponent to Leo. 

Again, Leo is in shock. All he’s thinking is “why” and “what” and many other synonyms for said terms. You can see his eyes flit between Raph’s own as he continuously tries to read what his brother is thinking. Then his brows furrow once more as it finally sinks in. Raph hated Leo for so long. Up until the point where he came close enough to kill him. It didn’t matter how much Leo trained to be better for Raph. Raph still hated him. Every fiber of his being. He’s confused and frightened still as to why. Just because they fought doesn’t mean there was any resolution. Leo is still left in the dark as to WHY his brother actually despises him. 

Raph, still seething, is beginning to shake all the way up to his face. Then it hits him. What he’s done. His pupils widen as his eyebrows slowly shift up. That’s Leo. That’s his older brother. That’s his family. That’s who he’s got pinned down. Who he nearly sent a sharp blade through the skull. Who he nearly murdered. Leo is still staring up at him, I’m sure wondering how someone could be filled with so much hate. Maybe for a split second, if the Ghost of the Jungle actually did kill those raiders in South America, Leo saw himself in Raph. Perhaps that scared him. This could have been the path Leo was headed down if it wasn’t for April coming and pleading for Leo to return home. No one was able to help Raph. No one tried to stop him from going too far down this path. Was it because he had been absent? Was this all because he left? This is what Raph really thinks of Leo, huh? 

I love how no words are spoken here, yet again. It’s brilliant what can be said without any actual words. There’s so much emotion between the boys after what just happened. 

And here’s Raph again. Still processing. He tries to shake it away as if it’s just a bad thought or a nightmare. He’s in disbelief of his own actions. He then starts to shy away from Leo as if in apology but honestly what’s to be said after that that will make everything better? He also looks a little to the right of Leo, but we don’t get to see what he’s looking at. Up until this point, I’ve always just figured he was just looking away in thought, not on anything in particular. But now, I feel like he could possibly be looking at the rain falling on the concrete roof as if to help him figure out that this is reality. That he’s actually here in this moment. And so is Leo. OR, he could be looking at Leo’s broken swords, which is also bringing him back to reality. He destroyed a part of his brother. He could have done so much more destruction. He gets up ever so gently as if Leo is a paper doll that will break under his weight or a sudden shift of movement. 

Leo still clutching onto his sword handles is probably subconscious instinct, like when something suddenly scares you and your muscles clench up and you hold tighter onto whatever. And here you can see that he’s actually showing that he’s in pain. His adrenaline is wearing off so the blows from just moments before are actually beginning to enflame his body. I’m sure there’s a part of him that’s scared of Raph now. Like there’s no more teasing or mocking. If he were to try it again, I’m sure he believes things could spiral out of control again. Something neither of them wanted anytime soon. His face is a little hard to read when he stands up, but mostly because he’s in pain and is showing that in his gestures and expression. Knowing Leo, he’s probably mentally asking so many questions. I’m sure he wants to talk. I’m sure he wants Raph to talk. But what on earth are either of them to say? 

They’re exhausted from the fight. Leo is visibly heaving his body. Raph is still stunned as ever as his eyes are fixed on his brother who is SOMEHOW ALIVE ?? He shakes his head slightly as the thought creeps through his mind again. As the more devastating idea enters. He doesn’t even want to consider what the aftermath would have been like. What if it actually happened. What if Leo wasn’t standing right in front of him? What if he was still on the concrete ground, covered in rain pellets, immovable. Just… still. With a single sai protruding from his head. No. He messed up. How could things ever be the same again? How could he move on from this? How could he go home and face his family? His brothers? Splinter? He feels like such a little kid. A scared child who’s worried about the consequences of his actions. He would be disowned. He would be shunned. He would be hated. What was he to do? He glances down at his weapons, still in hand, and gives a tiny gasp. These were almost murder weapons. Of his own brother’s death. So, he runs. Any specific destination, probably not. He just needed to be away from Leo. He has no idea if he’ll ever see him again. Or his family. He just messed up way too horribly. How would anyone be able to forgive him? How could Leo even be facing him?

As he turns away to disappear into the night, Leo inaudibly tries to call him back. Even after all that, Leo’s still trying to reach out to him. He doesn’t want Raph to leave. This is something they NEED to discuss. He’s not mad or angry at his brother. He’s confused. He could see it in Raph’s eyes that Raph was guilty about what he almost did. I’m sure he doesn’t audibly call out to Raph because he’s partially too exhausted to do so. Plus, I’m sure there’s still a bit of fear right on the surface. 

As Raph runs, he is most definitely ugly crying. But we can’t see that because of the pouring rain :’D so. And then Leo gets captured and yadayada. Wow. I think I may be FINALLY done talking about this 😂 I’m exhausted. If you read this much I’m honestly super proud of you and I appreciate you haha you’re amazing. If you have anything you want to talk about concerning the ninja turtles (preferably the 2007 film because it’s fresh on my mind, but I’m also down to talk about the other movies or the tv shows) don’t even hesitate to ask. I love talking about the turtles. We can debate certain topics, gush about OTPs, talk about issues we had with certain things. I love all that. 

[tangshcn]

What are your Tang Shen + Lou Jitsu's headcanons?

Ok strap in, this is gonna be long

Basically im gonna verbally puke my rottmnt Splinter hc origin story at u for the most part, so sorry in advance (i'll get to Shen eventually, i just need to figure out whatever it is shes got going on)

(By the way its kinda meta-ish at first but bear w me)

Ok so first things first: im going off my assumption that Lou Jitsu is a stage name and we're dealing w a whole ass new Hamato Yoshi

Going on a quick tangent though, i want to highlight some stuff ive noticed. Namely how the concept of choosing your own path regardless of what you were "born to do" seems to be a big theme in the series (ex. Draxum and the turtles)

AND how chillax the family dynamic seems to be, which i fully attribute to Splinter's parent and lack of expectations from his sons (which comes off as aloof desinterest in SOME case *coff*donnie*coff*, but thats not what we're talking about today).

And this just really makes me wonder, was he raised the same way?

My hellbrain says no.

We begin this story in Japan during Lou's (then named Yoshi, but will be called Lou for simplicity's sake) childhood as the clan heir to the Hamato clan, of the very few of its dying kind.

As the next head of clan, Lou is loaded with expectations. He'll lead a ninja clan in the future and must prepare for that moment.

He trains with his father (he was called Yuuta in the 2012 ver. and we'll be using him bc his mom has never been shown :( miss oginy at work) and he is taught to be quiet and to blend in, like a proper ninja. But Lou. Lou doesn't want that, he doesn't have a subtle bone in his body.

He was born to be a star and he will be one goddamnit, he won't be forced to remain in the shadows no matter how much his father wants him too.

And here's where he makes a choice: he can either

a) stay and follow suit w what he's been prepared for his entire life

b) he can leave and build himself ground up in a foreign country

Guess what he chooses

Anyways, there's a huge argument between Lou and Yuuta which ends with fresh faced 17-18 yo Lou taking the first plane headed to America. There were no goodbyes.

For the record, Hamato Yuuta isn't a bad guy, he's just a guy that wants the best for his kid(s? 👀 maybe... He also has a slightly younger son...... Saki.....) but can't seem to be able to consider that what he deems best isn't actually what would make Lou happy or successful. He still sees Lou as a child (which.. is kinda fair.. He's like 17) can't see eye to eye w him or see Lou's side of the story. They probably could have resolved the issue if they actually dealt w it but alas,,,,

Its a rough first couple of months of errand and short term jobs before he can even think of actually pursuing his dream of fame.

He's rejected from a couple of acting agencies until he actually finds himself working for one. As a handyman. Close enough, for now. At least he's seeing what its like upclose now. (He's handsome and charming but like... His acting is.. Godawful)

Its a pretty low-budget production of an action teen show and he flinches at some of the moves the actors pull (they don't even have doubles oh no). They're just so sloppy, jeez. So he takes it upon himself to tell them how to fix them so they look nice, at least.

He's in the middle of giving a demostration when the lead actress takes notice of him and fetches the director.

"We need that guy in here."

Lou's offered a spot in the show as a one off character so he can show off his moves. He ends up being an instant fan fave

The producers cave in and Lou gets signed up to the agency where they get all their teen actors, he does get an acting coach. Who happens to be a fellow actor, its the girl that accidently got him the gig in the first place.

"Hi, my name's Tang Shen. But we've already met. Got a name?"

And like that, a lifelong frienship was sparked.

[lesbianstarlightglimmer]

1, 8, 13, 19, 26, 35, 41, 48, 59, 65, 66, 74, 77, 82, 100, 147, 153, 185, 187, 225 ( FHDGHKHKGJFGJGFF.... uHHH that’s a LOT of questions, oops)

You’re good! sorry for the answer wait i was tired last night and knew i wouldnt be able to answer these well lol. anyways!

1- How are you? TBH SHOOK AFTER THAT EP

8- What did you do on your last birthday? My memories not the best but thankfully my birthday was on a friday and so i didnt hafta do much before i could go home and hang out. i wanted to do indoors kart racing but the only place we had in-state closed :(

13- If you could change your eye color, would you? hmm idk maybe but like id only do it if i could turn into a demon bat/aeon lmao.

19- Do you have any piercings? used to i think they’re filled now lol i had pierced ears but i got tired of caring for them rip

26- Something you are working on right now: i’ve been working on a Sugar Belle figure 👀👀👀 I’ve made the mane and tail and scrubbed the eyes and cutie mark off of a cheap rarity brushable so all i need to do now is paint but i had to bring it from home to my current place of residence bc i didnt trust my cats to not touch it lmao

35- Say 3 facts about your personality: I’m an INTJ, very much a logical thinker, and stubborn

41- Share 2 habits: I scratch at scratches, sores, and my scalp AND i regularly drink soda too close to bed lol (like rn for example)

48- Say 10 facts about your room: (based off of my room at home not this one since theres nothing about it lol) 

1. its pink

2. my bedding and some wall ornaments are black and white

3. i have a ninja turtle, acnl, and cat poster in my room

4. i have a display for all my tmnt, mlp, and funko figures i own lol. and by display i mean the top of my dresser is covered in toys

5. i have one floor fan but i also use my ceiling fan

6. i have an art desk but i dont use it

7. my bookcase is pink

8. i have 2 chairs (not including the art desk one) that i just do not use

9. fireball is almost always in there

10. dirty

59- Five weird things that you like: 

(not in any order)

1. MLP (since most people my age dont particularly like it but thankfully ive found on tumblr im not the only one!)

2. Funko pop (since tumblr like…hates them ig lol)

3. sleeping w something between me and the wall (cant do that here but at home i have a zebra body pillow between me and the wall)

4. praying mantises 

5. Rigby 

65- What is your favorite thing to do? Write! even if i dont do it aall the time i still like it!

66- What’s your favorite color? i like p much all colors except those that remind me of gross things. also highlighter yellow

74- Your favorite ice cream? baskin robbins’ icing on the cake is GOOD

77- Describe your favorite texture: tbh just anything really soft. EXCEPT VELVET I HAAAAAAAATE IT

82- What are four things you can’t live without and why?

1. Fireball bc i love him too much i mean i literally had a breakdown on friday bc i was freaking out at the possibility he had diabetes and thus would die young

2. google docs in some form or another bc i love to write but my handwriting sucks and sometimes when i hand write i get too excited and go too fast and thus just get scribbles

3. my fav chinese food? its just so good and i hope it doesnt close until im old and gray lol

4. my eggscellent hat bc its one of my prized possessions (see number 59)

100- Top three places to visit:

Is revisit alright?

1. New York

2. Canada

3. Italy (never actually been here i just wanna go there lol)

147- What’s the sweetest thing anyone’s ever done for you? not to be a r*mantic on main again but licherally anything my gf does for me. also anything my friends do for me in gen

153- If you have a boyfriend/girlfriend, what is your favorite thing about him/her? how dare you ask me to say only ONE favorite thing about my gf?! smh! no way to do so! ghdkslalkdfjg

185- Last movie you just watched: megamind!

187- You’re in a tattoo parlor about to get inked. What are you getting done? probably an alien head!

225- Five words/phrases that make you laugh:

1. IM AT SOUP

2. p much all of john mulaneys standup

3. all the mst3k shorts in gen i can quote them TOO easily

4. p much all of the monster factory w final pam and the truck driving simulator. some of the others too but those two really stand out

5. THIS COMIC HAS ME IN STITCHES EVERY TIME

Thanks for the ask!!

Ask away!

[couldnt-think-of-a-funny-name]

"crazy detention stories"...go

They’re really not that crazy I don’t think but fine- but as I had detention at least once a week for 3 years you’re only getting the highlights here:

So again, I only ever got detentions because I was late to school basically every day. Every single day, the office wrote me a late slip with my name spelled horrendously wrong. Different spelling every day. The most famous butchering was writing my name as “Millie Hoagie”. On my very last day of high school, I was predictably late, and they spelled my name perfectly correctly.

So listen my ‘reputation’ in school was basically “quiet good girl who’s never done anything wrong, ever, in her life” and “teacher’s pet” and the like. And despite the fact I was there every time all the ‘Bad Kids™’ who were also always in detention were always incredibly surprised to see me??? Like they never got over it. Every time I walked into the damn room at least half the class would be like “MOLLY YOU DON’T BELONG HERE YOU’RE INNOCENT!!” 😂

Also despite the fact I was basically invisible in the school as a whole all the trouble makers knew me by name because, and I quote a kid from my 10th grade Spanish class who was trying to hook up with me at the time here, “Guys like me are afraid of you, Girl, we’re just plain out scared that we gonna corrupt you!” and I still don’t know what he actually meant by that???

Bu anyway, this apparent rep usually gave me an upper hand with the teachers monitoring the detentions. Because, you know, some were fine, some were bitchy, some were insane. But all of them were pissed about the fact they had to be there instead of heading home.

The rules of detention were literally just ‘stare at the wall and don’t talk’, depending on which teacher they might let the students do homework. But since I was apparently a great person and always had the class’ incredulous response to me being in the room, they usually let me get away with sleeping or reading a book lol.

Of course…no one said any of the other kids were inclined to following the rules lmao. These were like, all the class clowns™ shoved into one room. Things always got real funny real fast.

It would always start off with the coughing game. If you’ve ever stepped into a school you should know what that is.

It would then escalate to everyone in the room playing catch whenever the teacher looked away for a brief moment

Detention was always in the health classroom so someone always tried to steal a limb off the skeleton without being to obvious

Some teachers would let people talk ‘quietly’ so jokes were fucking abound

One time I was minding my own damn business and a kid slides me a note saying ‘in like five minutes ask to go to the bathroom but head downstairs to the English wing’ before he snuck out without the teacher noticing. I get down there and he’s at one end of the hallway and another boy is at the other end. Upon seeing me, these boys run full speed down the hall at each other, leap up in the air when they get to the direct center, high five with full force, both scream in pain, and then hit the floor, clutching their hands. I was cracking the fuck up and trying to convince them to go to the nurse but they wouldn’t listen. I asked the guy why the hell they did that. He told me ‘because we wanted a witness and no one will ever believe you’ 😂😂

One time my sorta-neighbor Mike comes in and the teacher asked why he had detention and apparently, the principal had asked him where to find his friend Jose, and Mike responded “he’s out picking cotton” and the principal flipped out at what he perceived to be a racist joke and gave him a month detention. But the thing was, Jose was in an agriculture class and he was literally outside picking cotton that they had planted there earlier. Jose found it fucking hilarious and refused to tell the principal to get his friend out of trouble.

As I haven’t been inside a school building for quite some time now I don’t know if turtling is still a thing but it was…quite an epidemic for my senior class.

It’s when you turn someone’s backpack inside out right? But it was a full blown war with these kids. Trust no one. Never leave the room. Never look away. Holy shit. One of the best moments of this occurred in detention, when a boy reached to get a book out of his backpack to find it was gone. After 15 minutes of searching the room, he found it, turtled, hidden in a filing cabinet in the front of the room. Everyone, including the teacher, was loosing their shit, because how did someone pull that off so quietly and invisibly without someone noticing??? No one fessed up. The class was in fear of the turtle ninja for the rest of the month, but they never struck again. No one ever discovered who it was.

Guys: It was me.

One time it was raining and the teacher was in a bad mood so he insisted all the windows stay open. He left for a bathroom break or something and this one poor kid, who was now completely soaked as he was stuck with a window seat, just said “fucking bye” and just…climbed out the damn window. Left his backpack and everything. Didn’t see him again for at least a month.

There was one guy who always sold ice cream out of his bag when the teachers weren’t looking. Where he was getting it from and how it stayed frozen is beyond me.

Oh my God sometimes all the indie singer kids would just come and sit on the floor outside the classroom and talk loudly to annoy us??? The hell were they trying to accomplish??? Your singing ain’t special and you won’t be famous, please let us die in peace.

One kid had detention because when we were running laps in gym class he jumped up to hit the arch of the ceiling and accidentally set off the fire alarm. The teacher that day insisted on continuously referring to him as ‘the delinquent’, as if no one else in the room had broken the rules or something

One time one of the gym teachers was in charge of it and long story short he started doing the jersey turnpike. True horror.

One time the teacher got a call and she had to go down to the office and the second she was gone this one kid’s friend runs in with a huge tray going “Y’ALL I STOLE THE LASAGNE CUPCAKES FROM THE FOOD AND NUTRITION CLASSROOM” and we dined like kings.

Everyone would sometimes just break out in song for no God damn reason

One time one of the guys in charge of the detention was A) Not someone anyone recognized as a teacher and B) Potentially Stanley Tucci. Like…I was about 80% certain that this guy was Stanley Tucci.

He refused to confirm or deny or even give a name

One time I was really absorbed in my book when all the sudden a letter flew onto my desk, an anonymous sender that just said “You have a soft, sexy voice.” Neither of which is true, I’m pretty sure, and I could not for the life of me figure out who sent it omfg

One time a teacher was freaking out because he went to a psychic over the weekend and was told there was a lot of activity around him so I looked him straight in the eyes and told him I’m a medium and I can see that the devil had marked his soul and he threw me out of the room and refused to take that class for detention ever again😂

It was a hot summers day. The ceiling fans were on their highest setting. A boy nudges me, with a small carton of ice cream in his hands under his desk. “What do you think would happen if I scooped out a huge chunk of this and threw it at the fan?” he whispered. “Jamil, no.” I pleaded, but it fell on deaf ears. Soon, the room was filled with confused screams.

Apparently all the other regulars™ had bought me candy grams around Christmas time so they were confused when I showed up to detention with no candy and apparently the student council member sent them all to the other Molly in the grade because she was the popular one and this lead to about 12 boys grumbling for two and a half hours like “The one damn time I attempt to be a gentleman” and “I know where she lives” and “Gonna gingerbread her fucking locker” I could not stop laughing

Oh God okay one time the teacher we had was literally. Off the charts.

Like there’s the chill teachers, and then the bitchy teachers. And then this lady. She literally reminded me of Stubel

So I didn’t even know who she was but I walk in and do my shy smile/quiet ‘hello’ thing and take out my book so she immediately zeros in on me as ‘the good kid’ as usual

But she literally seemed to think every other person in this class was a hardened criminal holy shit. She was all over the place barking orders and yelling. And of course, you’ve got a room full of class clowns, like they feed off teachers like this. So the madder she got the more ridiculous they got. I was literally almost in tears trying to force myself not to laugh because I didn’t want to risk her turning on me omfg

So she yelled and flailed about the room and they kept going with jokes and paper wasps and lying about their names and just doing literally every thing they could possibly do so this woman wouldn’t have the chance to rest

This escalated with every minute and came to a resounding end when the teacher decided the Australian Kid™ was chewing gum and picked up the trashcan and shoved his face in it, screaming at him to spit it out as he yelled back “YOU’RE ONLY DOING THIS BECAUSE IM AN IMMIGRANT”

he was in charge of all the bullshit that day and it was hysterical but he wasn’t the one chewing gum loudly that was me

The vp came in to see what all the yelling was about to find a teacher shoving a boy’s head in the trash, one boy shirtless as another drew tattoos on him, the phone off the line with it’s cord wrapped around a kid’s neck, two boys dueling with skeleton arms, one kid with her leg out the window, a kid tying a skeleton foot to the ceiling fan, rubber bands and paper wasps flying from every angle, three people turtling backpacks, someone brandishing an epi-pen, sexual hangman being played on the chalkboard, someone eating ice cream and fanning himself with money, and me, crying into my book with my hand literally bleeding from all my efforts to not laugh at what I was witnessing

We never saw her in detention again😂

My one younger friend got a detention for being late and was really shaken up about it and I tried to tell her she’d be fine but then she got caught sliding me chocolate animal crackers during it, and subsequently got another detention because of this; somehow I was not viewed as an equally guilty party and didn’t get in trouble

This one guy came in complaining “You guys all told me to get a twitter and I get thrown in twitter jail my first day!” “That’s like a thousand tweets in one day, how the fuck did you mange that?” “Bitch I had a lot to say about McDonalds!”

One teacher came in and was like “I don’t feel like helping with homework but does anyone wanna learn how to hack a computer?”

Someone got caught pouring water out the window but when the teacher looked to see why she saw the youngest of the goats™ standing under the window with it’s mouth open waiting for more

One time the teacher wouldn’t let me go to the bathroom and after I asked for like the 5th time he said “It can’t be that important!” so I just pulled a pad out of my backpack and silently sat it on my desk while glaring at him and this 40 year old man looked like he was about to pass out and he finally let me go

I remember our final detention of senior year we were told that if we skip it we can’t graduate so everyone went into that room with a ridiculously nostalgic attitude and one guy finally stole the skull off the skeleton and we fucking tossed it around the entire time while singing and blatantly ignoring the teacher’s complaining lmao

I know there’s more but it’s 7am and this is long so all in all like…I do not miss high school but some memories are bearable lmao

[what-even-is-thiss]

Gender bender au